#I didn’t even answer your initial question! yes you should! 100%

[holdingontoheadache]

hi this is probably soooo random but how much do you think it’d hurt to listen to stardust by zayn and then smfs by fob??

i’m listening to stardust and idk why it feels like a stab in the chest and i kinda wanna hurt more 🫣

Andy!! ✨

So I was curious myself and listened to them back to back and.. stardust represent the same thing in both songs (or at least that’s how I interpret it lol)!!

With Zayn’s stardust, it represents love as stardust and that feeling of weightlessness that comes to admiring another person. The butterflies in your tummy and the bashfulness that come from expressing those feelings for said person. With FOB’s [so much (for)] stardust, it also represents love as stardust and reminiscing on those initial feelings for the other person and not so much regretting that it happened, but regretting that it didn’t end well. Hoping and praying that it would turn into something that was never meant to be; “so much for even trying!” and all that!!

And I love to be there with you

‘Cause you make anywhere at all

Feel like stardust

Floating all around us

vs.

I think I’ve been going through it

And I’ve been putting your name to it

So much for stardust

We thought we had it all

Also, the very first lines of both songs being:

Pretty Christmas on a cardboard cup

I wait for you outside to pick me up

vs.

I’m in a winter mood dreaming of spring now

Burning myself down, burning myself down

Burnin’

Zayn’s stardust takes place in that same winter before it goes bad! Fob’s stardust is the aftermath of that winter, wishing for it to be spring so badly to move on and forget the stardust that’s represented in Zayn’s song!!

[favroitecrime]

Do you believe that the Israeli children murdered are culpable for the crimes of their government?

I think we both agree that Palestinian children and Palestinian civilians are not valid military targets, despite what Netanyahu and the Israeli government may claim, but do you believe the same applies to children who are being raised in Israel?

gonna need you to point to where i said otherwise bestie

but to entertain the question(s) in full:

I’ve overstated how much I believe children should never be victims & sexual violence is also never excused. I’d never stand & advocate for the lives of Palestinian (& Syrian & Congolese & Sudanese & Armenian & Puerto Rican & Polynesian &&&&) children whilst simultaneously wishing unwell on another group of children.

But there’s a lot of things I hate about this framing & it’s that first and foremost, the children are not the only ones that matter here. What good is saving the children if they’re stripped of the elders of their family? What good is sparing the life of a disabled Palestinian girl in Gaza being wheeled from the North to the South by her father if you’re going to arrest her father and leave her stranded to be saved by other passer-bys? What good is saving the children if they’re wishing they died along their parents?

Second, not only are the civilians not valid military targets, they’re not targets at all. None of them deserve to suffer. None of them deserve to bury their dead in mass graves. None of them deserve to be killed whilst seeking shelter in schools, hospitals, mosques, churches, etc. None of them deserve to starve for days on end & no water in sight. None of them deserve to watch their mass graves dug up and over 100+ of their loved ones’ bodies being taken away by israeli forces to god knows where (likely the skin bank, where they harvest Palestinian organs for their own). They deserve none of it. Hamas could be in every damn room in every damn building and it still could never justify anything, let alone being military targets.

Third, it should shame you by now to STILL shift the narrative to israel & israelis whilst discussing Gaza or Palestine. Enough already. It’s been 41 days. We’ve condemned enough. The conversation cannot be redirected to straw-man arguments & questions meant to what? Pull out a scandalous answer? Was I expected to say yes I see the kids as military targets? What’s your next step knowing my answer is no?

Finally, the government lied. The israeli government has lied repeatedly. They’ve been putting out numbers of their victims ranging from 1200-1500 and just announced today that they’ve overstated how many of them died because it turns out 200 of those bodies were bodies of Palestinians. Which begs the question, if they were so torched and barely recognizable, who did the torching? Why did they silence the interview of one of the survivors as she says that the IOF were largely responsible for the death of multitudes? Why is it they’re interviewing soldiers who were on duty that day who’ve said their orders were to target anything that moved? An israeli plan was mass killing everyone at the music festival because the orders were to go for anything that moved.

Mere days after the initial invasion/“attack”, one of the women who was held in her home with her children went on an interview and said they didn’t harm them at all. They stayed for two hours, one even politely asking for a banana, before quietly shutting the door behind them. Her youngest was so undisturbed they kept tapping away on their tablet. Hamas may not be complete angels, but they’re not barbarians. They’re not savages. Children would never be their main targets, nor targets at all. Any dead children were either caught in a crossfire or much more likely killed by the IOF.

I reject the narrative that I, or anyone else in defense of Palestine, agree with the death of children (no matter who they are). I reject the idea that I, or anyone else in defense of Palestine, would be okay with acts of sexual violence being committed to anyone. And I refuse to cover up the atrocities happening in Palestine with any sympathies you expect me to extend to israel.

Children should never be victims. Including Palestinian children. Free Palestine. 🇵🇸

[atwentywhore]

Hi! No hate at all (I love your blog) but I was curious about your post about true-crime. Can you explain why you hate them? I for one find them fascinating and very informative. You can’t erase history and these are stories that need to be told!

Hello! First off, thank you for the kind words! I appreciate it 😊

Before I answer your question, I will say this: I am by no means an expert in this subject and what I am about to say is purely my opinion. However, if you do feel the need to research further (which I recommend), I’m sure google will be much more informative and explain things much better than I will. I will do my best to articulate though!

I’m sure at this point it is no shock to my followers/friends that I am not a big fan of true crime to begin with. Which is saying something, because when I was younger I was definitely all over it. Whether that be documentaries, docuseries, podcasts, crime scene photos, 911 calls, etc. I was consuming that content at an alarming rate and almost became desensitized to it as a whole (which is NOT something to brag about mind you). It wasn’t until I truly looked within and asked myself why I found this content so fascinating. Why was I so unbothered by actual peoples suffering? That’s when I was realized that this isn’t something I should be consuming for entertainment. There is nothing fun or entertaining about the real life suffering of my fellow human beings.

That was when a switch really flipped and I started seeing more videos/posts about people who were the friends and families of the victims begging people to stop sharing their loved ones stories, telling people how horrific it was to see people talking about these terrible things like they were nothing and having to relive the trauma they dealt with over and over again. And that is exactly what happens with most of these docuseries about serial killers/murderers in general. And yes, in case you haven’t guessed it, this is 100% in reference to the new J*ffrey D*hmer docuseries….

This whole series was framed as being informative and really trying to tell the victims stories, not J*ffrey’s. Yet, it did the complete opposite. And if you pay attention and listen, you will see that the families who initially agreed to this were lied to and are now disgusted by how the whole series of events are being portrayed. This docuseries isn’t about the victims, it couldn’t care less about them. And I don’t care if you agree or disagree because the real people affected by his actions are not happy with it, and neither should you.

I think we really have to sit down and ask ourselves why we seek out content about other peoples suffering, especially when those were real people. What makes it so informative? What does this docuseries give you that a quick google search won’t? Why won’t we, as fellow human beings, listen to others who have been affected by these horrible tragedies and not consume this content? This series was not made to shed light on his actions, it was a pay check. One they didn’t even share with the families that lived through the events you now watch on screen.

And to your point of “these stories need to be told”… D*hmer, G*cy, B*ndy, etc. are some of the most well-documented serial killers in history. There is no shortage of content or information on them. What is the point of constantly rehashing the atrocities they committed every other year? If you’re curious, look it up yourself.

And it doesn’t just stop with docuseries, it’s most true-crime content in general. Over the years, people seem to have forgotten that these horrific stories they are listening to/watching are about real people. People who can’t give their consent to have their story told. Or even just families who were never asked if it was okay to share this information. Imagine you are scrolling through tik-tok and come across a video of someone telling the story of a loved-one of yours who was murdered. Can you imagine how triggering that must be? Now this isn’t to say that all true-crime content is like this. Some are “ethically sourced” (for a lack of better term) but I would hazard a guess to say that most of this content is not.

Please keep in mind that I am not saying that if you consume this type of content that you are a terrible person. I cannot tell you to not listen to these podcasts or watch these tv shows, but what I can say is be mindful. Are the families/people affected by what you are about to watch okay with it? Have they even been consulted? If not, why would you continue?

Anyways, that was a super long winded answer, but I hope this helps explain my viewpoint. I literally wrote this out in a google doc before transferring it over here. Let me know if you have any other questions 😊

[iambilliejeanok]

Work Meets Love.

Pairings: Madara x reader

Warnings: 18+ not for minors. Slight degradation. NSFW. 100% Smut. Slight fluff. Overstimulation. Mentions of pee

You woke up to the sound of light rain hitting the window of the large office space. Wrapped in a black and white throw blanket comfortably sitting in Madara’s lap, your legs dangled on each side of his work chair, arms loosely wrapped around his abdomen while your head rest on his chest. You initially came here to cuddle for a little, snuggling into him while he worked on some important documents regarding the establishment of the Kage summits that would be taking place more often, to maintain peace amongst different villages.

The rise and fall of his warm chest lulled you into a nap you didn’t intend to take, but you had no willpower to fight the inviting slumber, Madara not having the heart to wake you up either, a smile pulling at his lips as he watched you rest. Madara worked more often than he took breaks, leaving you lonely most of the time. After voicing out your mutual need for affection and attention, you were both able to work out a way to cater to each other. One of solutions being that you’d get to cuddle with him while he worked in his office, as long as you promised to stay quite and be good. No trying to get off on him like you usually enjoyed, or else you’d be sent away to await a long and hard punishment as soon as he finished his work.

His chin lightly rest on top of your head, hands flipping through stacks of paperwork, peacefully signing away, the weight and warmth of your body against his own calming, helping him think through a couple of problems that were recently brought to his attention at the previous Kage summit. He lifted his chin as you lifted your head, instinctively pausing at what he was doing so you could get comfortable again. You shifted in his lap to try and find a cozier position, bringing your arms up to wrap around his neck, placing a few kisses on his cheek before nuzzling your head into his neck. Once your shifting had stopped Madara was able to go back to his working, careful about not being to loud with the papers on his desk so as to not wake you up. Even though he gave you specific instructions to not fall asleep on him while he was working, you obviously ignored them, which Madara thought he’d remember for later, but for now he’d leave you to your nap, seeing that you weren’t as distracting this way.

The small smile on his face from your kisses was gradually replaced with his serious work face again as he went back to reading and signing the documents. A few minutes later you shifted again, a minute later again, until your constant movements began to bother him. Your eyes slowly opened, your hips still shifting in his lap, realizing that you needed to go pee. You whined, deeply annoyed at the inconvenience of having a bladder. You reluctantly pushed yourself off of him, stopped by the large hands on your waist. You looked at him, your eyes half lidded as you attempted to shuffle off again, still being held in place by the strong hands on your waist. “Hey sleepy head”, he teased, pulling you closer to his chest to embrace you. “I need to pee!”, you whined out, voice muffled as he held your head down onto his shoulder, drowning you in his loving embrace. “Baby, I thought we agreed you were only to come cuddle for an hour twice a day?”, he musingly questioned. “You���ve been here for nearly two and half hours”. “I’m just really tired…and I miss you too much. I didn’t want to nap by myself”, you sleepily responded. “I need to pee”, you repeated, trying to break away from the embrace you couldn’t fully enjoy while being so pressed. “But baby I missed you too”, he said, holding you tighter as he planted small kisses on your cheek. “Madara”, you warned, a hint of mischief in his smile as you finally managed to lift your head up to look at him. “I need to go pee right now. Please let go”, your voice a little louder , growing slightly impatient. He leaned in closer to you, placing his a hand at the back of your head before pushing you in for kiss. You whined in his mouth, hands flat against his chest desperately trying to pull away. His arm snaked around your lower back, keeping you flush against him while the other kept your head in place, his mouth ravishing your own in a passionate kiss. The sound of the rain was much louder now, the pattering at the window coaxing you to pee all the more. You whined again before Madara finally broke the kiss, his lips slightly parted to catch his breath, loosening his hold on you. You were able to shuffle back and swing one leg off him to stand, the blanket dropping to the floor. Just as you turned your back to him his hands found their way to your hips again, pulling you back down to ungracefully plop onto his lap. He pushed you slightly forward, adjusting you so you sat on only one of his thighs, your crotch resting against the fabric of his pants. “Madara, I’m really going to pee, you need to stop!”, you warned, the tone of your voice serious, knowing exactly what he was up to. “Stop what?”, he teased. You couldn’t believe he was taking this as a joke. He slowly pushed his thigh up, keeping you firmly planted against it as his hand gripped your waist, moving you back and forth as he repeatedly pushed his thigh up into you, forcing you to ride him. The only thing between you and his thigh was the thin, black lacy underwear you wore, underneath the baggy shirt you borrowed from your husband. That didn’t help your situation at all! The pressure you felt on your clit mercilessly poking at your bladder. “Madara please”, you whimpered, knowing you stood little to no chance against his actions before you’d pee. Your husband simply ignored all your pleading. He pulled you back against his chest before spreading your legs wide with his own. His hand reached in between your legs, pulling out another desperate plea from you as his middle finger pushed against your clit through the the thin material covering your forbidden fruit. You felt your bladder about to explode, not sure if you could hold it any longer as Madara’s finger stroked your clit. “Do you think you can hold it in a litt- ”, but you finally let go, unable to hold it in , you finally let go, making a mess all over Madara. He felt the warmth of your pee quickly spread all over his lap, completely soaking him. He sat in complete silence, the sight of you peeing on him making his dick twitch in his pants. He should do this more often.

“Fuck baby”, he whispered directly into your ear. “Look at the mess you made. Peeing all over me. How filthy”. You couldn’t see the sly grin planted on his face as he spoke. Looking down in utter shame you apologized,“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to it’s just th- mmm!”, he cut you off in a kiss. His hands lifted the shirt you wore up, quickly pulling it up over your head, leaving your upper body bare. He infused chakra into his hand, damaging the fabric of your underwear easily enough to rip it right off of you, leaving you naked on top of him. His lips immediately returned to yours, one hand cupping your boob while the other possessively cupped your naked pussy. He ran his tongue along your lips, demanding entrance as two long and slender fingers stroked between your other lips, forcing you to open up for him with a moan. His tongue explored your mouth, swallowing all your moans. His fingers stimulating your clit in quick and rough strokes, flicking on the little nub to bring you closer to your orgasm much too fast. You couldn’t stop moaning into the heated kiss that threatened to burn you as he brought you closer to heaven, pinching and pulling at your sensitive nipple. You braced yourself, feeling the first wave of pleasure tower you like a tsunami about to wreck an entire city, when his fingers suddenly stopped, immediately snatching your orgasm away from you. “Nooo please”, you reached one hand up to bury it in his thick black hair, your other gripping his forearm as you desperately tried not to bring your hands to your pussy to finish the job. Kami help you if you ever dared to give yourself an orgasm after he denied you one. You whimpered, not looking forward to being edged tonight.

He totally ignored you, his hand lightly slapping your wet pussy, causing you to whine at each slap, before tilting your head up so he could kiss you again. You were way too lost in the kiss, Madara groaning into it as he slipped two fingers into your heat, remembering how good this would feel on his dick, your tight pussy swallowing him in. His fingers immediately setting to a slow and steady pace, curling as they stroked your g spot. As much as he lived for tongue fucking you, he broke away from the kiss only to hear the pretty sounds you made as he slowly finger fucked you. His other hand joined the assault, two fingers spreading your lips apart as his thumb came up to massage the little nub. You moan aloud, almost screaming as he introduced you to shocks and jolts of intense pleasure. “Fuck yes baby, is daddy making you feel so good?”, his voice much deeper as he groaned into your ear, his dick pressing against your ass as you squirmed on his lap, enjoying the pleasure he was blessing you with. “Answer me!”, he growled this time, startling you to respond, “Yes! Aaahhh, ooohhh fuck daddy! That feels so….aaahhhhh! Please don’t stop!”, you pleaded, nearing an orgasm you knew was about to destroy you. You screamed as he added more pressure to everything, generously stimulating you to a shuddering, drooling mess before he stopped. You let out a high pitched whine at the loss of his fingers, all stimulation stopping at once. You bucked and squirmed in his lap. You couldn’t even babble any words, having to wait for the pleasure to subside before you could complain once again. “Why would you stop!”, you were finally able to cry out. Madara kissed the tears flowing down your cheeks, bringing both his hands up to massage your breasts, his second favorite part of your body. The first being your ass, he swore the sight of your ass jiggling as he pounded into you would be the death of him. Especially when he fucked you in front of a mirror and he got to see your boobs bounce and ass jiggle at the same time, prepare the funeral because you stole his fucking heart with how gorgeous you were. He never lasted too long when he fucked you like that. You strained your neck to look him in the eye. He looked back at you, relishing in the intense eye contact as he rolled your pretty brown nipples between his fingers. “Please, can I c-cum. Please daddy”, you sniffled, hoping that he would sympathize if he saw the needy look in your dark brown eyes. His heart fluttered when you called him daddy. Having a beautiful and strong, young woman like yourself totally submit to him definitely boosting his ego. But unfortunately for you he was the in the mood to make you cry tonight. Especially since you interrupted his work with your cute self.

“Give me one good reason to let you cum and I’ll gladly make you squirt all over my lap my love”, he said, trailing his hands back down to your pussy. You stuttered as his fingers took their position again. Two thick fingers sinking into you, the other hand spreading your lips apart as his thumb pushed up against your sensitive clit making you throw your head back, a long whimper leaving your lips. You were so beautiful like this, completely submitting to him without him even having to ask for it. “Let me know when you’re ready to answer”, he spoke before lowering his head to latch onto your nipple, his warm tongue flicking around it before he started sucking. His thumb began massaging your throbbing clit again, his fingers curling has they repeatedly stroked your g spot, the tantalizing actions leaving you a whiny mess. “I n-need t- to… to.. cum d-daddy pleeeaasee”, you cried out, trying your very best to keep up with such blissful cruelty. “Why?”, he breathed out, your sweet sweet nipple leaving his mouth with a pop, his hot breath fanning over it. “Because! I..I-I’m daddies angel, oooooh fu- aaahhhh!”, you tried your best to answer. “My sweet baby, of course that’s true, but did you forget that falling asleep here in my arms while I’m working is against the rules?”, he spoke loud over your cries, unrelenting in the way he lovingly stimulated your private parts. You broke down, your juices adding to the mess you made earlier on as you neared your orgasm. Your piercing cries were slightly muffled by the rain pouring outside as you came closer and closer, body shaking and drool falling down your chin as your eyes rolled to the back of your head. Madara watched his wife convulse in his lap, the erotic sight proving to be too much for him at the feel of his painful erection straining against his pants. A soft moan left his mouth, completely inaudible to your ears, your body violently shaking as you finally came, Madara trying hard to continue stimulating you through it. He wouldn’t stop until you’d let it all out. Even if he was mercilessly over stimulating you he didn’t care because you asked for this anyway. You couldn’t handle the orgasm that possessed you, the vice grip on your husbands hair forcing a deep warning growl out of him. He knew you probably wouldn’t hear him because of how far gone you were, his big hand cupping your pussy as you came, preventing you from squirting all over the place, creating a little puddle in his hand until you were finally done.

“Shhh, baby…I know, you’re fine. Just breathe. You need to relax”, he whispered in your ear, his arm wrapped around your waist and his hand running up and down your tummy, holding you flush against his warmth, slowly bringing you back down to earth. “Look at all this mess you made, my angel. You and I both need a shower don’t you think?”. “Mmmhmmm”, you hummed in response. Basking in the glow of your orgasm. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you. Let’s get you all cleaned up my love”, he spoke, standing up with you in his arms. You clung onto him as he carried you to the bathroom. You were ready to spend the rest of the night making long and hot sweet love.

[sacredsorceress]

Finders Keepers || Bucky Barnes

pairing: bucky barnes x avenger!reader

summary: you and bucky have been dating for years and just as he finally finds the courage to pop the question, he loses your engagement ring.

a/n: happy weekend! reblogs and replies are super appreciated!!

word count: 1.9k

warnings: none, pure fluff

masterlist || request || taglist

“Now that I’m thinking about it, maybe I should just wait.” Bucky said, pacing back and forth across the bridge.

Watching his friend nervously fiddle with the tiny velvet box in his hand, Sam chuckled pushing himself off of the railing.

“Buck, stop stressing out, man.” Sam laughed. “She’s going to say yes.”

Making his way over to Sam, leaning over the railing, Bucky sighed staring at the reflection of the streetlamps glowing in the water of the river beneath him.

“You don’t know that.” He said. “She could say no. She deserves better than some bridge, maybe-”

“Buck, if I know Y/n she’s going to think this is ten times better than anything else you could throw together.” Sam assured his friend. “You guys met on this bridge fighting one of the big three... that’s pretty romantic if you ask me.”

“There’s no such thing as the ‘big three’.”

“Of course there is, but because I’m such a good wingman- I’m gonna let it slide for the night.” He said, leaning over the railing beside his friend. “Do you remember the size of that android? If she didn’t find out about her mutation right then and there your ass would be dead right now.”

Bucky couldn’t help but laugh because he knew that he was absolutely right.

The two of you had met two years ago to that exact day in the place where he and Sam were standing right now. Bucky and some of the other Avengers, including Sam, had been fighting a ginormous Android. Just as the fight was heading increasingly south and Bucky had come to terms with the fact that his overextended life would be ending sooner than he thought, he watched as the fist that was about to pound his body into the ground halted in midair.

He was shocked. He was sure he was going to die. He was even ready to welcome it, but when he looked around, trying to find out why the android would stop so suddenly, he glanced to the side only to meet your wide eyes, arms extended outwards toward the android. Despite the fact that he could tell that the android was struggling to move, he watched as you lifted your arms, the android rising into the air until you swung your arms, throwing the it into the river beside the bridge.

Once the initial splash of water had washed over the bridge, Bucky immediately pushed himself off of the ground, running to find you. When he did, he discovered you, soaking wet on the ground, staring back up at him.

“I... I don’t-”

You scrambled to find words to say to him- to explain what had just happened even though you didn’t even understand it yourself- but Bucky didn’t even care. He was in awe.

“You- you saved my life.” Bucky said before realizing that you were still on the ground and he reached his hand out to you. “What’s your name?”

Glancing at his hand for split moment, you grabbed it, pulling yourself to your feet.

“Y/n.”

“Y/n.” He said testing the sound of your name in his mouth before smiling. “I’m Bucky.”

From that day, you and him had been inseparable, beginning to date not long after. On the day he asked you to be his, he knew that that was the last time he was ever going to be asking anyone that question because you were it for him. He was completely and utterly yours and he didn’t want anyone- or anything- else.

“Yeah, I guess you're right.” Bucky smiled, snapping himself back into the moment.

Watching the smile on his friend’s face, Sam couldn’t help but smile in return, patting his friend on the back.

“She should be coming by soon, right?” He asked. “Sure you’ve got the ring in there and everything?”

Flipping open the lid of the tiny box, Bucky picked up the ring that was sitting inside, turning it around to watch as it shined under the streetlight.

“You’re the one who helped me pick it out.” Bucky said, glancing over his shoulder at Sam. “If you change your mind now I think I’ll throw you over this bridge.”

“It’s great, Buck-”

“Hey! Buck!” They heard your familiar voice shout.

You were here early.

Shit.

Afraid you would catch him with the ring in his hand, Bucky scrambled to place it back in the box, but as he did the ring slipped from his fingers. Juggling to catch it, he leaned further over the railing. Just when he was sure that he caught the ring however, it slid off of his vibranium hand and into the water with a tiny pop.

“Shit!” He swore to himself.

“Holy shit!” Sam exclaimed in a hushed voice. “Did you just drop the ring?”

“Yes I just dropped the ring, Sam!” Bucky whisper shouted. “You’re not helping! Shit. Shit. Shit! What do I do?”

Glancing over his shoulder, watching your figure quickly approaching the both of them, Sam grabbed the box from his hands, shoving it in Bucky’s jacket pocket.

“Listen! It’s gonna be fine.” Sam assured him, patting his friend on the chest. “Just ask her, okay?”

Glaring at his friend as Sam began to back up in the opposite direction, Bucky yelled once again in a hushed voice.

“How the fuck am I supposed to do that without a ring?”

But before Sam could answer, you came up behind Bucky, resting your hand on his shoulder. When Bucky glanced back at where Sam had been, he had already taken off into the darkness.

Taking a deep breath, telling himself that everything would be okay, Bucky turned around to face you.

He didn’t have to fake the smile that immediately met his face as soon as he looked at you. 

You always managed to take his breath away.

“Hi doll.” He smiled, resting his hands on your waist.

Wrapping your arms around his neck, you leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss against his cheek.

“Hi baby.” You smiled. “So, what’s the occasion? Why did you ask me to meet you here?”

Admiring the way you looked standing underneath the glow of the streetlamp above him, he tried to relax, remembering the speech he had been practicing in front of mirrors and Sam for weeks.

“Do you remember the last time we were here?” He asked.

Of course you did. How could you forget?

“Of course I do, Buck.” You laughed. “How could I forget saving the love of my life’s life?’

It was crazy how still after everything he had gone through and two years together with you, he could still feel his heart skip a beat when you called him the love of your life.

“Well I- I asked you to come here because I wanted to ask you something.” He said removing his hands from your your waist, instead taking your hands from around his neck and holding them in his.

As soon as he said that he had wanted to ask you something, your heart began to race in your chest. Was he doing it? Was he finally going to propose to you? The two of you had discussed marriage before, so it wouldn’t be a shock, but you never knew when he was going to ask. Or how.

When he backed away from you, your hands still in his, you watched as he kneeled in front of you, his eyes meeting yours.

He was doing it. He was really going to do it.

“Y/n.” He said.

“Yes?” You asked, not being able to help the smile on your face.

“Um,” Bucky began, able to hear the shakiness in his voice before he cleared his throat. “I uh... I know you’re already guessing what I’m doing right now, but I have this whole speech and everything so just bare with me okay?”

You nodded. 

“Of course, Buck.”

“When I had my mind cleared back in Wakanda and came back from the blip, I didn't think I would ever have a normal life again, you know? I thought all this dating stuff was behind me and I was just going to be that guy who fights people with a metal arm.” He chuckled. “When you saved me right here two years ago, I thought I was going to die this miserable 100 year-old guy and I just accepted it, but then you threw that dumb hunk of metal in that water and- this sounds really cheesy but Sam said I should say it anyway- you saved my life, but you also saved me. You gave me another chance at life and I don’t ever want to live it without you, so...”

You felt as his hands dropped yours and watched as he pat his jacket pockets before slipping his hands inside of one of them, pulling out a small velvet box.

“Will you marry me?”

He didn’t even have time to open the box before you nodded, a bright smile gracing your face.

“Yes.” You laughed. “Of course I’ll marry you, Buck. Is that even a question?”

Glancing between the box in his hands and you he chuckled nervously.

“Yeah?”

“What do you mean?” You asked, laughing.

Pushing himself back onto his feet once again, Bucky pulled you close to him, only the box separating the two of you.

“Save my ass one more time?” He asked.

As he did, he opened the lid of the box to reveal... nothing.

There was no ring in sight, only the empty cushion where you would have expected one to be.

Furrowing your eyebrows you looked up at your fiancé.

“Did you....” You tried to piece the situation together, taking the box in your own hands. “Did you lose it?”

“I dropped it in the water when I heard you coming.” He admitted.

Not being able to help yourself, you laughed thinking about your fiancé being so nervous he dropped your ring into the water moments before proposing to you.

“Where?” You asked.

Rather than answering, he guided you over to the bridge’s railing, pointing at the water below.

“It slipped somewhere over here.”

Rather than teasing him once again for dropping your engagement ring in the river minutes before proposing, you leaned over the ledge of the bridge, stretching your arms out. As you did so, you felt Bucky come up behind you, resting his hands on your waist while he tucked his chin into the crook of your neck, peeking over your shoulder at the water below.

Sensing the piece of metal, you pulled your arms forward, bringing the ring to the surface. When it landed in your hand, you leaned back into your fiancé’s chest, slowly opening your hand to reveal the gorgeous ring resting in your palm.

“Oh Buck.” You cooed. “It’s perfect.”

Taking the ring between your fingers, you slipped it onto your ring finger, stretching your hand out to admire the ring he had chosen for you to symbolize your commitment to one another for the rest of your lives.

“Finders keepers.” You teased him, laughing as you showed off your ring.

Wrapping his arms around your torso, you felt as he pressed a kiss to your cheek from behind.

“That’s fine by me, doll.” He hummed. “As long as I get to keep you.”

[felrend]

Thoughts on Aloy

I rolled credits on Horizon two days ago and have had some time to think about the over all story and game play for the sequel. It’s been interesting reading other people’s thoughts and opinions and how different a lot of them are from my own. Even one of my favourite gaming podcasts are utterly different and they didn’t pick up a lot of story beats that I did. Maybe because they game lined the story and didn’t focus on every single side quest and talked at length to your companions like I did. Horizon Forbidden West has exceeded my expectations and improved a lot of things from the first game. It also dropped the ball on a couple of things but it didn’t ruin the experience for me. And HFW is 100% my game of the year. The story was captivating and left me begging for more  but also dropped a lot of lore and twists that I never thought I would see coming.

I’m going to break my thoughts down by categories and yes, this may be a long read and I’m sorry! Lol

First we gotta talk about Aloy and the growth that she has gone through from beginning to end. Aloy has the literal weight of the world on her shoulders and isn’t afraid to bulldoze her way through people to get to the results she needs. She can be harsh and doesn’t put other people’s feelings or beliefs into consideration when trying to get things done. And yes, Aloy can be cold and stand offish when people like Erend and Varl reach out. She doesn’t know how to people or to rely on any one. There’s probably some fear mixed in with being rejected if she opens up and shares her world. Especially the realization that she wasn’t born but made. You see that struggle in the beginning when she initially gives Varl the focus and has to answer his questions. It’s her brushing it off and shying away before moving on to the next thing. But Varl pushes her, makes her realize that she can’t do this alone or she’ll either fail or die trying. Varl was that spark that Aloy needed. He didn’t give up on her and followed her to the bitter end. Even calling her out on running off. You also see the pain her actions have caused and her not realizing that leaving after Meridian would be such a big deal. She’s not comfortable in group settings or being praised. She literally did not have that growing up. She had rocks thrown at her and adults brushing the other kids away from her. Of course she’s going to be socially awkward and anxious. As the story goes on though, you see her compassion and love of the world around her. The side quests are the perfect example of her warmth. Aloy is kind and understanding when dealing with the side characters, being stern when needed but also showing that not all hope is lost.

She also discovers patience when dealing with Beta and watching her unwrap those feelings for her sister is really powerful. I knew the two of them would have their “blow up” moment and I wish there was more to it. I wanted them to storm off after the fight and then come together when Aloy realizes that she is also putting pressure on Beta for not being Elisabet. I did the quest with Delah and Boomer at Hidden Ember and thought I did it at the perfect time story wise. If you haven’t played it, Boom or Bust, then I highly recommend. You should also visit them at Chainscrape when you first start playing. Because you get a great weapon that I kept in my weapon wheel for a majority of the game. 

Aloy is a complex character that is still growing and developing. Which is why it bothers me that people are being so harsh about her personality and characterization. She’s not your cookie cutter protagonist. And I appreciate that Guerilla Games is taking their time with developing her. Aloy has a lot of trauma to unpacked and rushing that would do her a disservice. We see the woman that she is becoming and the fact that she is going to pave her own path rather than trying to live up to her mother’s standards is a beautiful thing. Also being able to take the time to mourn Rost and realizing the importance of his presence in her life was such a key moment for her. Has she fully mourned him? No, but it’s leaps and bounds ahead of where she was at the start of the game. And if it wasn’t for Varl, who knows if we would have gotten that.

It also upsets me that people are letting the fact that there is no “ship” ruin the experience for themselves. Or that their desired love interest was “taken away”. Does Aloy need a love romance? No. Is it something that she deserves as an ending? Possibly. But I’m also a big Erend fan and their relationship seems to be cannon or at least growing in that direction. So please take that criticism with a grain of salt. I do understand being upset with some of the writing choices for certain characters. And I’ll get to that soon. But this story deserves the chance to be played and explored. So keep going. It might not be right in your face, but I picked up on a few moments that shows the door isn’t closed.

This post is already going pretty long. So I’m going to cut it short here for now and delve deeper into each character. Because there are a few that have been introduced that deserve so much more love!

[dazz-linglight]

Smut with best friend!Sunghoon pls 😭🤚🏻

(He's irresistible 🥺)

Working overhours again was tiring but at least you are getting paid for those extra hours. Plus time though you're not alone, you have Sunghoon working with you. You've been friends since he started working there a few months ago and somehow you were the only person who truly understood this man of few words. Also it didn't take long for you to develop a seemingly innocent crush on him. He is handsome, tall, smell good, is a real gentleman, how could you not be attracted to him?

You stretch and let out a little yawn after being focused for so long, which caught Sunghoon's attention.

"Tired?" His voice a little deeper since he hasn't talked in a while, sending shivers down your neck.

"Yeah, I wasn't expecting to be working till late today, but here I am." You sigh and stand up to stretch your legs a little, which were starting to feel numb because of how much time you spent sitting down.

"You had plans for tonight?" He asks also standing up and walking towards you, supporting his lower back on your desk and crossing his arms. He was wearing a classic white shirt today and his signature black tie that made you swallow dry and look into his eyes before he noticed where you were staring. Little did you know that he already noticed. The same way he has been noticing this whole time.

"No, actually I just wanted to have a night to myself, you know? face masks, order some good food, take a bath with candle lights.. Just a little spa day to relieve stress." You felt your shoulders getting heavier, as if all of your responsibilities accumulated on them and closed your eyes for a second, only to open again when a pair of strong hands landed on your shoulders. You let out a little surprised moan until it hits you that Sunghoon is massaging your shoulders. You bit your lip to avoid another moan of coming out.

"Better?" He whispered dangerously close to your ear and you nodded, hearing him let out a low laugh under his breath.

"I asked a question and I would like an answer." His voice sound even deeper than before.

"Yes, it's good..." You reply not louder than a whisper, any other noise and he probably wouldn't have heard. You stayed quiet for the next seconds, not knowing what to say. Does he know? Is he messing with you on purpose? Does he feel the same way? You're too scared to ask and maybe cause the end of your friendship, so you just stay quiet while he was massaging you.

"You know, I have a question for you." He suddenly said, grabbing your attention.

"I was wondering, since we're alone in this office, it wouldn't be a problem if we become more comfortable, would it?" He stopped the massage to grab his tie, pulling it off with his eyes locked on yours since you turned around.

"I don't think so..." You say, carefully looking at his big hands wrapping his tie around his left hand and took a step closer to you.

"It's hot in here, don't you think? I think... I should do something about it." He said slowly dragging his fingers to his shirt and unmade the first buttons, watching your reactions. Of course he's also attracted to you. You're his type, physically and in personality, but he also didn't wanna risk ruining the friendship, but he couldn't take it anymore. He's been fantasizing things with you, specially how you would look while you two do dirty things friends don't do and even though he was almost 100% sure you're attracted to him too, he was waiting for the right opportunity to make a move. Now alone in the office with you wearing those clothes that hugged your body so perfectly and the whole thrilling part of doing something risky in a place like this, how can he resist? And what can you say? You're too distracted by his hands and the fact that this is really happening, it's not just a daydream. He stepped closer and whispered in your ear.

"You think I didn't notice the way you look at me? Why do you think I wear these tight shirts, hm?" He pressede a little kiss behind your ear and continued teasing.

"You think I never noticed the way you clench your legs everytime I lean on your desk? I wonder what you do when you're alone.. Do you think about me?" You were now too embarassed to answer, the heat going all the way to your face, you're looking everywhere but his eyes. So his index finger came to your jaw and turned your head to being your gaze directly at his eyes, which were darker than usual.

"Now you're quiet? What happened to the talkative person I know, hm?" One of his hands came to your neck and the other to your waist, pulling you until there was no space between the two of you.

"Guess I'll just have to take those words out myself, then." He grips your chin and smiles sweetly.

"Don't be afraid, I'll be gentle with you." He press a soft kiss on your lips and caresses your excited body with his other hand, going between your legs and you moan because at the contact. He switched positions to lay you down on your desk and kissed you wildly, pulling your long skirt up and wet panties down. You were obviously needy and he could see the way you bit your lower lip while he opened his slacks, tasting the mix of saliva he left. You look back at him and a let out a "Please, hurry up.." He debated making you beg, but instead slid two fingers in and you squirm.

"It's not enough..." You complained and he stroked his length slowly, pulling his fingers all the way out and rubbed the tips over your hole, barely sliding it in.

"So you want my dick?" He asked and you nodded kicking the back of his leg.

"Put it in before I make you regret it." Sunghoon smirked at your initiative, finding it hot that you finally decided to talk.

"As you wish." You feel something warm slide in, like an explosion that getting bigger and filling you up. He thrusts into you and moans out breathlessly with you.

"Fuck yes.." He pulled almost all the way out and pushed back in deep and fast, hans pulling your hips against himself and damn did it feel good. Perfect, even. Your bodies moved rhythmically in sync as he studied your pretty skin, running my hands over your torso and breasts, listening to the delighted noises escaping you. He leaned over you using the desk to support his weight and began to stroke as deep as he could, folding your legs up.

"Ah- Sunghoon!" It came so suddenly that almost made him pause, but instead he picked up the pace, finding stamina he didnt have before, and fucked you with all his might, pushing into you faster and faster and you notice that the climax will soon be reached with all the warmth that flows through your body.

"Fuck, I'm going to cum.."

"Me too.." The fire ignites and burns around you, euphoria flowing through your bodies. You gasp when he grips the base of your neck and tighten his fingers around it, coming down to kissand bite your collarbones, your moans resonating loudly in the office. He let out a deep groan as you both have reached a trembling hot orgasm.

"So good, so beautiful.." He takes you in his arms andbrings you to sit up, you can see the glitter in his eyes. He smile and kisses your forehead, caressing your hair and you feel safe in his embrace. You didn't know that it was possible to have such feelings, so painfully incredible.

[hongism]

mists of celeste ➻ 37

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, smut ➻ word count: 16.9k(? i think?) ➻ rating: M ➻ warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, future warnings tba chapter specific warnings: talks of torture, talks of past self-harm, nothing directly graphic all mentioned through conversation, graphic depiction of a panic attack ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you

⇐ previous | next ⇒ | masterlist

✧✧✧ act five ➻ part four

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“I’m going to kill the king, Hyunwoo.”

“Y/N, you can’t… that’s going too far.”

“I don’t think we have a choice any longer.”

“We always have a choice, Y/N. It’s just about what you decide to do with that choice that matters. Think about why you’re doing what you’re doing, and what your intentions truly are. It’s not about revenge or payment for a crime — the crimes of his people cannot be put onto his shoulders.”

A sigh passes through your lips, one that sounds more exasperated than anything else, and Hyunwoo lifts a brow upon hearing the noise.

“This is revenge, Hyunwoo. He allowed my past to be taken, he created the law that allows the military to do that. Not to mention the other crimes he has committed — even if they are a result of him sitting idly by and watching them happen. I’m not saying Jisung is always right or that he is a saint for wanting to do this. But if Jisung won’t commit to doing it, then I’ll do it for him.”

“And we swore to find a way to get those memories back, Y/N. Don’t let this cloud your judgment. Don’t let your devotion to making Jisung happy decide your future. If this is something he wants, then he should do it himself and face the consequences on his own! It’s not a burden that you should bear as well. I know this is something you will come to regret!”

“Then you’ll have to stop me with force because I’ve already made my mind up about this. I don’t see Jisung getting in my way right now. But after all, isn’t this what he wants? He’s just too much of a coward to do the dirty work himself!”

“We both know where he stands on this, which is precisely why he’s not here. Just — please let us try one more time. I’ve spoken with a few of my off-planet contacts about this, and we have one last idea that might reverse the effects of the serum. You know how difficult this is; the military keeps such a tight wrap on everything about the serum. It’s near impossible to just get a spare vial, and even harder to examine how it works with test subjects while still being ethical. We are trying our best, I promise, just please hold out a little while longer. Jisung is getting things set up now… so please… just come with me and try before you do anything drastic.”

The man extends a hand, palm facing towards the ceiling and fingers outstretched for you to take. There’s hope in his eyes, a hope you haven’t seen from him in a long time, and that look is what brings your feet forward. You place your palm over his and curl your fingers tight around the side of his hand. He squeezes back as a small grin overtakes his lips.

“If this doesn’t work, then you know what I have to do, Hyunwoo.”

“I know,” he whispers. The hope in his eyes flickers a little, like a flame hit by a gust of wind. “In that case, I’ll do whatever I have to so that you don’t come to regret that decision.”

“Hey, get up. It’s go time.”

You wake with a start, not fully come out of the memory that paints the insides of your eyelids until you look around at your surroundings. Yeosang seems to be the one who woke you seeing as his hand is still outstretched to your arm. The sight of him brings you back to reality and reminds you of where you are and what exactly is going on. Jongho sits on your other side, dressed in nicer clothes than you’ve ever seen him wear before — a pleated and pristine navy suit complete with a bright yellow tie and hair gelled back on his head. Yeosang too wears a somewhat expensive garb although he appears more natural in the silk tunic covering his torso. His naturally dark roots are starting to peek through the blond near his scalp, accentuating the harsh part down the middle of his head.

Despite the fact that both look relatively harmless in this state, you know they each have weapons hidden somewhere on their person underneath that formal wear, just as you do with the knives strapped over your thighs under the skirt attached to your waist. Such an outfit like yours is something you hardly agreed to — it was moreso an insistence on Seonghwa’s part to at least dress the part (although he had to listen to some of your incessant nagging about how you could never fight in a dress so he had to settle on finding a substitute in the form of a jumpsuit with a skirt wrapped around the back. Yet the more you pick at the seams and touch the fabric, the more you recall the none too pleasant conversation you and Seonghwa shared as you were preparing to leave for the mission.

“Perhaps I do have an eye for beauty after all, or is it that you simply look breathtaking in anything?” Seonghwa stands in the doorway to your bedroom, not a mind for privacy as he watches you struggle to tug the zipper of your suit up.

“Can’t even breathe on my own, huh?” You huff out as you drop the zipper in defeat.

“I’ve already seen every inch of you, have I not? There’s nothing to hide that I haven’t seen before,” Seonghwa says through a laugh. He watches your cheeks flush with color before dropping his arms to his side and coming closer to you. He remains wordless as he pulls your zipper up for you, smoothing the fabric under his fingers down once it’s pulled up to your neck. “It suits you. Things like this, I mean. The silk makes you look… softer, yet the color combination of black and white makes you look lethal. Perfect definition of beauty, no? That something so delicate could also kill you? A wonderful dichotomy in my eyes.”

“Someone is in a poetic mood today.” You don’t hide the way your eyes roll to the back of your head, but Seonghwa doesn’t seem all too bothered by your show of faux-annoyance. Instead, his hands find your hips and turn you to face him directly, staring so intently into your eyes with his own dark ones that you lose the rest of your retort.

“I’m sorry. I wanted to go on this mission so desperately but that didn’t quite work out.” You’re quick to shake your head, already in the midst of denying his words before he even finishes his sentence.

“It’s alright. I’ll have Yeosang and Jongho there with me.”

“I would go if only Hongjoong would let me bu—” The thought cuts short as you place a hand over his forearm.

“Seonghwa, it’s okay. Hongjoong is right to have you stay here while you’re not 100% better. And you can both keep an eye on Jisung this way. We’ll bring Wooyoung back as quickly as possible, I swear.” Instead of consoling the man, your words seem to have an opposite effect as he drops his gaze to the floor.

“If I were stronger, this wouldn’t even be an issue. You should not have had to waste so much time having to look after my fragile and weak mental state when you could have caught up to the ship sooner and had all three of them back in one go.”

“This is what we’re working with, Hwa. It has nothing to do with your welfare. We still would have been too late regardless of whether that night had happened or not. So please — it will all work out and be okay. It has to.”

Seonghwa’s smile is quaint, a small twitch of his lips, then he’s leaning in to close the distance between your lips. You lift your hand to push hard against his chest, furthering that distance before he gets the chance to meet your lips with his.

“I just put on this black lipstick and you already want to mess it up? How rude,” you scoff. That isn’t a real reason, and you both know it, and you only solidify that further when you speak next before biting your tongue. “You shouldn’t push it right now. I still haven’t forgiven you for not fighting my decision to go with Jisung. Besides wasn’t the decision to… stop whatever this is mutual?”

“It was, of course,” he murmurs back, not quite meeting your eyes. “I am merely a creature of habit, so it will take some time for me to adjust to this change. But… Y/N, might I be so bold as to ask you something?”

“Hm, isn’t that a question right there?”

“I’ll take that as a yes then?” You regard him with a small nod but pull away so that his hands drop to his sides again. “Were any of the feelings you had for me something real and tangible? Not just because of what we are and that comfort of both being Sirens, I mean.”

You should have known he would bring this up eventually, especially with how the two of you are constantly dancing around each other and the topic. Still, you aren’t ready for it.

“I… don’t think I know the answer to that question, but even if I did, I-I might not be able to answer with complete honesty.” The smile that comes to paint Seonghwa’s lips is nothing short of sad and painful, not quite reaching his bright eyes with its usual mirth.

“It’s a conversation I wish for us to have one day, but I too fear that I might not be able to be completely honest either. Perhaps — perhaps we got a little too caught up in the heat of things without truly thinking about why we were doing the things we were doing.”

“Why did you do it then? I was the one who gave the initial push, I started things, I claim responsibility for that, but you pulled right back. So why?”

“I have found time to think about such things quite a bit lately since I was left in the medbay alone for so long; however, now is not the time to talk about that as it would take too long. Has Wooyoung brought you back yet?”

“No, not since the night in the medbay. But San very clearly said three days until they would land on Dorado, and it’s been six since then. They should be there by now, and the deals should have gone through. Wooyoung’s was to be immediate after all.” Seonghwa’s smile drops into a half-hearted scowl.

“Without Wooyoung on the inside, we will have no way of knowing where San and Mingi are.”

“Unless Jisung decides to be kind with his information.” You run a hand through your hair, mussing the already down tresses enough to be somewhat noticeable. “We’ll have to make do.” Seonghwa stretches across the empty space between you

“I won’t keep you any longer then. Tell the others good luck from me, and please… be careful? No unnecessary risks if you can avoid them. I’d like to see you all back in one piece.”

Reality swoops in on you as Jongho places a firm hand over your thigh.

“You alright? I can practically feel you thinking so hard.”

“Yes, yes, of course. Just… wondering about the mission.”

“It’ll be okay,” Jongho murmurs, squeezing at your leg a little tighter. “It’s a straightforward mission — easy in and out.”

“Hopefully.” Yeosang is the one to hum the word but he doesn’t look at either of you as he speaks. “Once we’re in, I’ll talk to the main desk and ask for someone with Wooyoung’s general appearance. It’ll be a bit difficult because they will have given a new name — something a prostitute would have. I’m not sure how many people in there will have similar appearances to Wooyoung but we’ll have to do our best. You two remember what you’re supposed to do?”

“Yes,” you nod. “Follow suit, wait fifteen minutes for you to pass through the reception area, then ask the same thing. A male short in stature with black hair and tanned skin. All prostitutes have collar so it won’t be Wooyoung’s defining feature any longer.” The recitation rolls off your tongue with ease after having heard Yeosang repeat it so many times by now. He nods in approval nonetheless.

“Remember there are cameras in each of the rooms. Don’t know how they use them but it’s something to be aware of. Hopefully, one of us will be able to come across Wooyoung, and in the case that you do?”

“We are to stay in the room with him for the allotted time, ping back to the ship and let Hongjoong know we have him, then wait for his signal,” Jongho responds. “His contact here on Dorado will be hacking their surveillance systems once we are certain that we have Wooyoung in a safe position.”

“Hongjoong sure seems to have a lot of contacts for someone who doesn’t trust people,” you murmur more to yourself than to anyone else, but Yeosang picks up on it nonetheless.

“His contacts are few and far between. This is one he has known since before he became a captain, so he holds a bit more trust with him. Back to the plan though, after his contact confirms our safety, you’ll crack a window and hop out hopefully unscathed. Remember that the Upper Echelon of Dorado is tight on security. Whoever gets Wooyoung out will have to be mindful of guards and try not to look suspicious. If any guards stop you, do not engage with violence. Simply do as they ask you to and tell them that Wooyoung is your slave. And one last thing: don’t forget we’ll be going in silent so keep a close eye on your wristbands. Understood?”

“Clear as day,” Jongho says while you offer only a hasty nod.

“Good, stay sharp then. We’ll be landing soon, and it’ll be go time immediately after that.” With that, Yeosang sits back and shuts his eyes, leaving you and Jongho to stew over the plan again in silence. At least until you decide you can’t take it anymore and turn to talk to the Berserker again.

“Are you nervous at all about the mission?”

A shrug.

“No more than usual. Recovering Wooyoung won’t be easy by any means, of course. It’s a step in the right direction, right? How are you feeling?” As though sensing your nerves, he pats your thigh a few times, and you simply stare down at the dirty floor beneath your feet.

“I feel a bit guilty in a way because I’m not too worried about the mission,” you admit, albeit quietly because you aren’t sure how please Yeosang would be to hear the words. “The only thing that is on my mind right now is how San is doing and if he’s okay.” Although you told Seonghwa otherwise, the sudden radio silence that Wooyoung has given you has made you anxious to an unspeakable degree. And not having the security of being able to see San through Wooyoung’s eyes is plaguing you more than you’d like to admit.

“I understand that,” Jongho says through a deep exhale. “I feel the same way about Mingi right now honestly. No matter how much faith and trust I have in Mingi, that fear always lingers and resides in me.”

“That’s how I feel about San. I shouldn’t be worried about him but part of me is just fearful that we won’t make it in time. That he’ll accept the serum before we can get him out.”

Jongho brings his hand up to take hold of one of yours, squeezing around your palm as tight as he can without hurting you.

“I know San better than I know anyone on the crew, besides Mingi perhaps. I’ve spent years at San’s side. He was the only person who trusted me at first and trusted me enough to let me in. That trauma he bears, the scars on his past, the red in his ledger, those lingering pains that resurfaced when the mutiny happened — I have felt them all. I spent months at the foot of his bed, taking what pain I could away for as long as I could, just existing to comfort him and help him get through even one more night. And in that myriad of emotions I felt from San, not once did I ever feel him desire to take it all away. Those scars he bears are part of him, and he treats them as such. Something like… small accessories on a bigger picture that he won’t let go of. So no matter what happens, I have confidence that San won’t let them win. He’s far too stubborn for that, his heart is too big, he has too much love in his body for such a thing. He would rather die before he forgets the crew, and that fact alone makes me confident that San will hold out.”

You are left in the wake of Jongho’s words for too long, letting them crawl under your skin and find a home there. You count the seconds that pass before your voice finds you again.

“I understand that.” Forty-one seconds. “It’s just the fear of him being hurt when I’m not around to stop it that is hard to get past.” Jongho’s smile is nothing if not soft and gentle, the epitome of understanding.

“In our line of work, that fear is always present. It’s always a possibility too, but at some point, you reach a point where you accept that sometimes, you won’t always be able to save someone from all pain. Just because you can’t prevent every ounce of pain doesn’t mean that you are doing something wrong or that you’re not doing enough.” Jongho pauses. Some emotion fills his red eyes and leaves them swimming with something unspoken. “There are some pains that we must allow to happen, no matter how much we wish to do the opposite. Even something as horrid as pain can be necessary and needed to move forward in life. Try not to dwell on it too much and focus on Wooyoung for now, yeah?”

“I’m trying my best,” you sigh and drop your head back against the seat. The second your thoughts begin to drift, you are brought back to another memory, this time one of Hongjoong’s dark office with Seonghwa at your side.

“You punched Jisung in the face?”

“Please, I let him off easy,” you huff back, ignoring the lieutenant’s slight shock in favor of finding interest in the wall.

“That’s not the important part,” Hongjoong cuts in from where he sits behind his desk. You shift to glance over the captain. “Does Jisung know anything about you being a Siren?”

“No, not that I recall,” you mutter after little thought. “I never slept with him or anything like that, and I can’t remember him ever seeing my back so it’s safe to assume he doesn’t know. Besides who would just see tattoos and immediately assume ‘Siren’?”

“Then his interest in you has nothing to do with you being a Siren?”

“Exactly, but why is that important? I can tell you why he wants me if that’s what you’re curious about.”

“We’re just eliminating suspicions right now.” Hongjoong shifts his focus to where Seonghwa stands. He wears a bit of a cocky grin as they stare at each other, both feet slung up on the edge of his desk and one brow raised. “See? Jin has nothing to do with this.”

“That doesn’t eliminate the possibility altogether!” Seonghwa retorts. A frown mars his otherwise pretty features, twisting his lips into a scowl so deep that you feel your own muscles ache at the sight of it.

“You live your life in fear of Seokjin. For what? Do you not trust me to keep you safe?”

“That isn’t it and you know it, Joong. I will not sabotage your plans simply because of what I am. That is why we keep my identity to be a closely-guarded secret yet our number one enemy knows of that identity. That is a weakness, and it’s one that you need to take seriously.”

“Why is that? Sheltering you would be more suspicious to the crew than anything else. Unless you would like to inform them of your identity? Allow me to call them all right this instant.”

“No! No, Hongjoong, I — fine. Have it your way. Keep believing that you’ll be able to fix where Jin went wrong by ignoring the issue altogether because th—”

“That’s enough.” You bristle at the tone of the captain’s voice even though he is not speaking directly to you. “I’m still on edge as well, Hwa, and I know you are as well. I know why you are too, but please have at least a little faith in me. Now, Y/N—” Hongjoong turns back to you now “—I’d like to ask about the nightmares you had that night.”

Your initial response is to inhale sharply and glance over at Seonghwa with panic boiling in your gut.

“Why do you want to know?”

All Hongjoong does is roll his eyes and drop his feet off the side of his desk. You purse your lips at the action, watching him with wary eyes as he shifts his position to prop his elbows up on the same wood.

“Seonghwa, you’re dismissed.”

“I — Captain?”

“Dismissed, Lieutenant. I need to speak with her in private.”

“Why is it something I cannot be present for?”

“That was an order, not a suggestion. Now go.” If possible, the temperature of the room would drop ten degrees. Seonghwa seems to want to retort further but he bites his lip instead. Then, he gives a quick bow at the waist and mutters a goodbye before slipping out of the office without any further issue. “What did your nightmares consist of?” Hongjoong repeats, arching a brow as he speaks this time as though it will get you to talk faster.

“You didn’t have to get me alone to ask me that, did you? What is this really about?” The questions flow without hesitation, and your second refusal to talk about the dreams draws a sigh from Hongjoong’s lips.

“Do you know anything of Seonghwa’s relationship with his mother, Y/N?” A beat of silence. You shift your weight from foot to foot, glancing away from the captain to find interest in something on the floor.

“I… did witness a few of his memories when the two of us were still with each other in the dreams, but — if you mean to ask me about his nightmares, I have nothing to offer. I didn’t see those at all.”

“No, he already told me all about those nightmares. I don’t need to know more of them,” Hongjoong exhales with a shake of his head. He draws his arms up over his chest as he talks, falling back to slump in his chair and letting his exhaustion shine through. “Initially, I was going to have Seonghwa go with Yeosang and Jongho on this mission. But now, that plan has changed and I will be sending you instead.”

“Why?”

“I can’t send Seonghwa down to Lynder unless I myself can be at his side the entire time. There is far too much of a risk if I am unable to do that.”

“Risk? Of what? He would be with Yeosang and Jongho, would he not?”

“Yet if even the barest whim overcomes him, they would have to listen to whatever he says because of his position as lieutenant. I am the only one with more power than him, and as such, he has to listen to me. If he goes to Lynder, the risk is of him abandoning the mission to seek out his mother.”

“That doesn’t sound like something he would do at all,” you counter. Both you and Hongjoong drop your chins at the same time, although yours is more of an accusatory and pointed action compared to the slumping defeat that comes over Hongjoong’s body when he lowers his head.

“I don’t know how much or what exactly you saw in Seonghwa’s memories. I do not need to know either. But something you need to know is that we have been back to Lynder exactly once since I met Seonghwa there. And that one single time, two years ago, we had to lock Seonghwa in the brig for six days straight to keep him from breaking out to kill his mother. Seonghwa tore cuts into his arms and shoulders so deep that Yunho had to come stitch him every night until we finally chained him to a wall to get him to stop. When he finally gave up on trying to break out, I went in and took the cuffs off, only for Seonghwa to choke me hard enough to fracture my neck and leave bruises that lasted for several weeks.”

“A-Ah…” The sound of your dry swallow echoes in your ears. It’s hard to imagine Seonghwa — cool, rigid, stoic, gentle and calm Seonghwa — ever being so depraved and rabid as to harm himself as well as Hongjoong. Seonghwa, whose greatest fear is losing his captain. Yet the grave expression coating Hongjoong’s delicate features remains serious and deadpan, and you know every word is one that holds a memory that is painful to recall. He’s telling the truth.

“Have you ever had that voice in your head telling you to be cruel, Y/N?”

“Of course I have,” you admit through a whisper, like the words are going to break the threads of tension hanging in the air.

“Seonghwa has lost his will and his mind to that voice time and time again, and it gave him his reputation as the Lieutenant of Death. Mingi may be a slave to a childhood which bred him to be a monster, but Seonghwa? He’s a slave to his own consciousness, the part of him that spent years trying to be perceived as an Elitist so that he could hide what he really is, someone cold and calculated without an ounce of remorse or emotion. He put his own monsters under the bed, but now he can’t get them out.”

Hongjoong sits up a bit straighter all of a sudden. His gaze is still unfocused and hazy though, refusing to look you straight in the eye. Either subconsciously or through the fog of that revisited memory, Hongjoong lifts a hand to his neck and rubs idly at the skin there.

“My Seon—Lieutenant is strong, but strength isn’t worth a damn thing when the person you’re fighting is yourself. He admitted to me once that the thought of letting that voice win is more terrifying than the act of killing his own mother. So for that reason, I can never allow such a thing to happen. Seonghwa’s demons are nothing if not rabid dogs begging for a pound of flesh, and if he can’t fight them on his own, I’ll do it for him.”

“Y/N, are you sure you’re alright?” Jongho yet again brings you back to reality, most likely a bit disturbed by the way you are squeezing his hand tight enough to hurt, but he takes it without complaint. “You keep drifting out of focus.”

“Yes,” you say, filling your chest with air when you remember to breathe properly again. “Everything is fine.” Rather than responding with words, Jongho just places his other hand over your joined ones and brings them to rest on his thigh. If you listen closely enough, you’re able to hear him humming a soft melody under his breath but the rumble of the transport car covers most of the sound up. Still, it’s a relaxing sound that brings you some much-needed peace of mind for the remainder of the ride.

And as it turns out, Yeosang wasn’t bluffing when he said the three of you would be there soon because you had barely started listening to Jongho’s soft song when the car comes to a screeching halt that leaves you lurching forward.

“Alright then.” Yeosang stands first, hands smoothing down the fabric of his tunic even though it’s still perfectly in place. It’s not against his nature to get nervous or anxious, but it is still odd to witness like this. He is usually stoic in an unsettling way yet the grim expression he now wears is only accentuated by the crude shadows cast over his face. “It’s go time. Let’s get Wooyoung back in one piece, yeah?”

With that, the three of you climb out of the vehicle to be greeted by a dark and pristine city with thick clouds of smoke billowing through the air below you. Looking over the lip of the road is like looking down a cliff with the dramatic fall to the lower portion of the city. You weren’t exactly prepared to see such a drastic difference between the upper and lower echelons, yet looking over that cliff is like looking into a different city altogether with wooden buildings and decrepit warehouses that can barely hold themselves together. Where you stand with Yeosang and Jongho feels like a different world altogether with roads lined with lights and technology, tall buildings made from wood with exquisite carvings detailing the sides. From what you saw of the city in Seonghwa’s memories, Lynder has not changed one bit since he was here last.

You can’t clearly see many of the buildings below your feet, but it doesn’t stop you from wondering which one could possibly be that bar where Seonghwa met Hongjoong, if it even still exists. Jongho pulls you away from the road by the arm, tugging you along behind him as you approach a new building. The swaying wooden panel outside the door is a dead giveaway, but it’s the absurd amount of lilies trailing over the railings that tells you what this place is.

“They weren’t bluffing with the House of Lilies name,” you mutter, wrinkling your nose a bit at the overwhelming stench. Yeosang has grown alarmingly still; he lingers outside the tall double doors with a hand hovering over the brass handles without budging even an inch for far too long. You could pretend to not know why he’s hesitating, you could act like he is merely holding you back and push past him in annoyance, yet instead, you find yourself laying a hand atop his shoulder and squeezing the fabric there lightly. “No matter what happens in there or what we find in there, we will bring Wooyoung out alive.”

Yeosang releases a shaky exhale that makes his shoulder quake under your fingers.

“I know we will.” He looks past your face to make eye contact with Jongho then gives a curt nod. “Here goes the first fifteen minutes of hell.” The Elitist pushes hard against the brass handles, and the door gives way to his effort.

If you thought the smell outside the House was horrid, you don’t even know how to describe the reeking stench of flowers that hits you with the force of a tsunami. It’s thick enough for you to feel as though you are wading through a sea of flowers when in reality it’s just a strange yellow haze hanging about the interior. Yeosang doesn’t let the smell affect him in the slightest; he walks inside without missing a beat, shoulders pushed back so far it nearly hurts to see. Despite that, he walks like a prince, like someone who knows how to act in high society with ease, and for the first time, you don’t see Kang Yeosang before you. Instead, it’s Kang Minhee, the forgotten prince of Aera, who walks before you and heads for the front desk where a middle-aged woman with dramatic hair and hefty makeup stands.

“We should mingle a bit and look natural,” Jongho whispers when the two of you stop just inside the doors. “May I?” He motions to your arm with a small smile, not saying anything else and leaving you confused.

“May you…?”

“Quit being dense and give me your arm,” he huffs back and extends his elbow for you to loop your arm through, and this time, you get the hint, hooking your hand around the inside of his arm. Yeosang shifts to look back at both of you as you pass, and you offer each other discreet nods before he returns to speaking to the receptionist.

You let Jongho lead the way for the most part since you aren’t sure what you’re supposed to be doing outside of “looking normal”, although even doing that is somewhat difficult. Jongho doesn’t stray far from the entrance area until Yeosang dips into a hallway and out of sight without looking back at the two of you. Moments later your wristbands buzz, signaling that it’s time for the first fifteen-minute countdown to begin. Jongho shifts to fiddle with his wristband while you keep your hand folded over his elbow still. It gives you a chance to glance around the whorehouse without the distraction of having to act normal, but frankly, there isn’t much to see beyond the bodies filling the foyer and mingling about the lounge before you. There are flowers everywhere — probably an overabundance of them, and they aren’t just lilies as they were outside. You can’t pinpoint whether those flowers are the source of the clawingly sweet scent stuck to the insides of your nostrils or not, but that yellow fog seems partially responsible to some degree.

“You seem to know how to look like you belong in high society,” you mutter once Jongho pulls his attention back to your surroundings. A huff of laughter leaves his lips.

“It’s not because I grew up that way. I was merely an observant child who wanted to grow up and have more than what I had.” A smile cracks his stony expression. “Isn’t that what all children want?”

“I—”

Well, you wouldn’t really know, would you?

Jongho’s expression softens as he realizes what he’s said and who he has said it to, and his gaze turns apologetic seconds later. He turns to flag down one of the workers milling about with drinks, taking two glasses of what looks like wine in one hand. Jongho angles one of the half-full flutes in your direction. You take the hint with relative ease despite the clawing scent of flowers still muddling your thoughts.

“I didn’t mean to hit a nerve,” Jongho says through what seems to be a sympathetic smile. “What do you think your childhood was like? If you don’t mind talking about such things. We have time to kill after all.”

You draw your lips into a tight purse, curling them around the edge of the wine glass and pressing an imprint of your dark lipstick there. Subconsciously, your hand tightens around the inside of Jongho’s arm as well, although the Berserker doesn’t comment on the added pressure as he simply continues to regard you with the same steely and careful gaze.

“I think it must have been rather sad,” you admit after some thought. It must not be the answer Jongho was expecting at all because his brows draw together in confusion. “What kind of childhood must one have for them to willingly sell away their memories by fourteen? The more I think… about that time — when they gave me the serum — I recall fighting the doctors but I don’t think it was because I didn’t know what they were doing. I’m certain that I knew my memories would be taken from me. It was the act of them strapping me to a chair like a prisoner that frightened me.”

This time when Jongho smiles, all you can see is pain in his deep red eyes.

“I would have given anything in the universe to have my memories taken away at that age too, if it’s of any comfort to you.” He pauses to swirl the liquid in his glass, watching the red liquor dance before his eyes under the yellow haze around your bodies. “Don’t think you’re weak for wanting to forget that past. No child should ever deal with pains that strong, even if you can’t remember what they are.”

“People like you… San, Mingi… the whole crew honestly — how can I not view myself as weak in comparison? People who were given the choice but denied it and rejected it unlike me, who apparently didn’t want to be left with some shred of dignity. What did I become with that fresh slate they gave me? All I could do then was be weak, but it seems like that hasn’t changed one bit.”

Jongho won’t let up with that devastating smile, and you are about to turn away so that you don’t have to see it any longer when he finally lets it fall.

“For what it’s worth, you are rather strong in my eyes. During your fight with Jisung, I’ll admit that I tried to ease some of your pain then. It’s not something you know about — the others know of it by now so I should have told you sooner and I’m sorry for that but I have a special mutation in my genes that gives me the ability to take away and absorb emotional auras. I inherited it from one of my grandparents so it’s something I grew up learning how to use and I carried that over when I joined the crew. I attempted to do that with you because you were in so much distress and I was worried but — b-but your pain was too much for even me to bear. So before you go around calling yourself weak, you ought to give yourself more credit. Just because the pains you bear are different doesn’t mean that they are any less than the pains the rest of us bear.”

Jongho doesn’t say anything more than that; he slings his wine back in one shot like it’s nothing then places the now empty glass on a waiter’s tray as he’s passing by. You don’t touch your own, mulling over the glass as you fall deep in thought. If Jongho could feel that much from you, then it begs the question of what else he might be able to feel from you.

Can he sense that I’m a Siren too? Would he be able to tell that Seonghwa and Wooyoung are Sirens as well?

Your mind shifts to latch onto something else he said. Your pain was too much for even me to bear.

“It’s okay, Y/N. Stand down,” he murmurs. “You need to pick your battles, and this is not one for you to fight right now.” Again you feel that pull of warmth coming from him, like someone is trying to pull something from your chest, but it retracts almost instantaneously. Jongho falters. His eyes squeeze shut harshly, face contorting with something that almost looks like pain in your eyes, but that lasts less than a second before he’s recovered again. It’s not enough to stop the onslaught of emotions coursing through your veins.

You had been too preoccupied at the time to think about that moment until now.

“That time — did I hurt you? When you tried to take it away, did I hurt you even a little bit?”

“Nothing you did hurt me, Y/N. It wasn’t your fault, I promise you didn’t do anything. It’s something I have done time and time again for others on the crew and something I would do again as well. It’s what I’m good at, and something I was born with for a reason. If it helps even a little bit, then why would I not take the temporary pain?”

Every fiber of your being is telling you to fight those words, to tell him that it’s not worth it, your pain should not be a burden he has to bear as well, yet no words fall from your lips. Your mouth stutters uselessly without saying anything, and Jongho just keeps smiling like nothing is wrong. The clenching in your chest is not fine, however, and you force yourself to turn away from him in the hopes it will alleviate that pain. Instead, your eyes travel to a head of bright red hair that is so starkly different than anything else in the room that you have to stare right at it. It would be nothing odd or out of the ordinary to you since the crew you are now part of has such a wide array of hair colors. It would be something you look right past without much thought.

And yet you find yourself staring right at it. Right at the girl who turns to look around the lounge with red hair sweeping through the air.

You jolt.

Something hits your shoulder hard enough to tip your drink over and spill some of the red wine onto the floor. Your hand retracts from Jongho’s arm to touch the knife hidden behind the fabric of your skirt. You’re forced to pull your gaze away from the girl, finding the man who bumped into you to just be a stumbling drunk man with little sense for spatial awareness and direction. Jongho wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you a bit closer to his body. The man continues on without any regard for you or the wine he just spilled. Jongho takes your glass with his free hand, discarding it at the nearest flat surface before redirecting his focus back to you.

“It’s okay, Y/N, everything is okay.”

“I’m fine,” you murmur back, but your gaze goes straight back to where that redhead just stood.

“You look like you just saw a ghost.”

Instinct tells you to stay put and continue on with the mission, putting that familiar face to the back of your mind. But again your heart is clenching painfully in your chest, racing so fast that you feel the pounds echoing in your ears, and you know you can’t let go of her that easily. Not when she’s this close to you.

“I think I did.” You pull away from Jongho to go chasing through the crowd after that red hair, but the Berserker moves with you in a rush.

“Y/N, we can’t get off track. There’s only six minutes until it’s your turn to go to the counter.”

You wave him off with a dismissive hand rather than responding with words. Moments later, you find your target again, just as she is turning to head for the hallway that Yeosang went down not too long ago.

“Soojin?” You throw the name out as a last resort, mostly a desperate attempt to see if you are right and your eyes aren’t playing tricks on you in this heady yellow haze.

She freezes in place. It gives you just enough time to shove past the crowd and get closer to where she stands. You close your fingers around her shoulder, tugging with as little force as possible so that she turns to face you. There’s not a doubt in your mind when you see her face. She seems to recognize you as well based on the way her eyes are blown wide as saucers. The girl — well, you suppose she would be a woman by now — glances past your shoulder to look at Jongho. Her throat rolls as she swallows around nothing.

“You must have me mistaken for someone else,” Soojin whispers, bringing her gaze back down to you. She dips her head a bit then pulls away from you to head down the hall. You think back to Jisung — the threats and odd comments he made combined with the newly resurfaced memories of Hyunwoo lingering at the forefront of your mind, and you know without a shadow of a doubt that you can’t let her go this easily.

“P-Please, Soojin — I need to talk with you. It’s important, please, I have so many questions and no one else to ask.”

“I’m sure you do, little scapegoat,” she huffs back. “I actually have work to do though and a client waiting for me, so I’m not all too inclined to speak with you. I’m not sure why you came here, but I don’t think I have the answers you’re looking for either.” You don’t have a chance to keep her from leaving after that because she turns and leaves so quickly that it leaves you reeling. Jongho tugs you back by the arm, pulling you from the hallway and out into the lounge again before you can chase after her.

“What the hell was that?” He hisses under his breath.

“She — I-I knew her. She w-was my teammate, one of the p-people assigned to my unit in the military. I… I had no idea she ended up here of all places. Jongho, I have to talk to her, please, I have to. This c-could be what I need! If Jisung won’t tell me the truth, then maybe she knows something. She has to know something o-or else I—”

Your voice dies in your throat, but your unspoken desperation seems to reach Jongho nonetheless. The key to whatever memories you lost could lie in Soojin. Things happened so quickly at the end, perhaps she learned of something before leaving Eros with the others.

“She called you a scapegoat,” Jongho says. He swallows hard, Adam’s Apple bobbing with the motion. “What was that about?”

Truthfully, you hadn’t gotten that far. You didn’t even think to question that part but it is odd and not something you recall her calling you in the past.

“I’m not sure why she would say that. All the more reason to speak to her and ask. Jongho, please!” You attempt to pull away from his grip as you speak. The Berserker doesn’t budge, too strong for you to fight like this, and he doesn’t let up even when you try to slap his hand away.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” He yanks you back to him and brings his free hand up to rest on your forehead. This time, you can physically feel the panic in your bones ebbing away and being pulled to your forehead where Jongho touches you. It’s a frightening sensation but the influence he has over you takes that fear away as well, leaving you in a daze of confusion because you know you should feel bothered right now but you cannot bring yourself to feel that way even as Jongho pulls away from you. His jaw twitches just a hair, not moving much beyond that, then he grits his teeth to hiss out his next words. “Wooyoung is our mission. You have to focus. You have two minutes to get up to that counter and do your job. We can try to track down your teammate later, but not on a mission like this.”

You have it in you to at least be angry enough to tug your arm out of his grasp.

“Don’t touch my emotions like that again. I understand you trying to take my pain, and as much as I hate that and despite the thought of you taking my pains for me, this is different. Emotionally sedating me for the sake of completing a mission better is different.”

You don’t give him a chance to reply before you’re heading off for the counter where Yeosang stood not too long ago. The woman who previously occupied the space behind it has disappeared, now replaced by a young man who must be younger than you from the looks of it.

“How can I help you, ma’am?” He asks as you sidle up to the desk.

“I’d like a room, an hour’s worth.” You fumble a bit with your pockets as you try to fish a credit chip out without exposing the knife strapped to your thigh, but the boy doesn’t look up until you slide the chip across the counter.

“Of course, of course,” he hums. “Do you have any preferences for pleasure tonight?”

“A male short in stature with black hair and tanned skin,” you recite back, forcing a smile onto your lips when the boy glances up at you. He tilts his head to the side. You swallow the saliva gathering in your mouth as the stare grows unsettling then he shakes his head and speaks again.

“Would you like someone more submissive or dominant?”

“Hm? Oh, um…” That wasn’t part of the plan. Surely Yeosang would have mentioned it if he had known they would ask. But what would he have said if they asked him the same? “Um, submissive is fine, I suppose?” The boy hums again then motions towards the hallway where Yeosang and Soojin both headed down.

“Your room will be on the second floor, Room 213. Please take the stairs at the end of the hall.” He passes a keycard your way along with your credit chip, leaving you with a grin and a soft-spoken, “Your courtesan will join you shortly. Enjoy.” You bristle at his words but manage to smile a little bit as you take both the card and your chip back. You leave the counter to head for the hallway, not pausing to look back at where Jongho might be, but you ping your wristband as you go. Nothing has come in from Yeosang’s side again so it’s safe to assume he doesn’t have Wooyoung with him by now. It leaves you and Jongho with more pressure and either more or less of a chance to recover him, so you can only hope for the best as you climb the stairs to the second floor.

Room 213 is empty as expected when you slip inside, and it’s free from that odd yellow fog outside as well, so you bask in the freedom and breathe fresh air deeply while you can. It’s a basic and standard room — much more like a small hotel room than anything else from the cabinet near the door and the double bed pushed up against the wall. There’s a metal sink as well close to the window but nothing else adorns the room leaving it rather dismal and simple. Not that you expected these people to treat the courtesans with even an ounce of respect; it’s still disheartening to think of Wooyoung being stuck in such a small and cramped space without a choice.

Whatever peace you thought you could have is cruelly interrupted less than five minutes later as a series of shy knocks reach your door. You blink up from where you sit perched on the edge of the neatly made bed. Is this how Yeosang felt waiting for his door to open? You inhale sharply, heart pounding mercilessly in your throat and choking you with the strength of an actual hand. And shamefully, you can’t even bring yourself to look at the door when it slides open, too afraid of not seeing Wooyoung standing behind it.

“Y-Y/N?”

You snap your head towards the door so quickly that your neck pops with the effort, eyes blinking open faster than ever, and even when your gaze settles on him, you still can’t quite believe he’s really before you. In that moment, the two of you merely regard each other with stunned stares like neither of you can believe this is possible, and in that time, the door slides shut again to leave you together in the all too small room.

“Wooyoung.” You bring yourself to your feet, standing on shaky legs as you face him. “W-Woo—”

He cuts you short by barreling into you with such force that it knocks the air out of your lungs. The metal around his neck scrapes against your skin hard enough to cut but you pay it no mind as he squeezes his arms around your waist and releases a heart-wrenching sob into your shoulder. Reason returns to you then, bringing you to ping your wristband again; although this time you tap it three times to alert the others that you have Wooyoung with you now. There is nothing more to do after that other than to hug him back as his tears soak your neck and shoulder.

“I-I didn’t — I di-didn’t want to lose hope b-but… fuck it was s-so hard not to and I was st-starting to think I wouldn’t ever s-see you again,” Wooyoung sobs. You almost want to cry with him if not for the small blinking light in the upper corner of the room that catches your eye and sends a surge of panic through you.

“The cameras, Wooyoung. They’re still on, we need to—”

“Y-Yeah, they’re — they only c-check if you hit the button by the bed.” Wooyoung pulls back from your shoulder, at last, rubbing at his tear-stricken cheeks so hard it makes his skin blossom with red. He pauses to catch his breath, or at least steady himself enough to speak without choking on his words. “That si-signals that you’re unsatisfied so they’ll c-check and see what’s — what’s wrong before sending a new courtesan.” Wooyoung puts his hand in yours and laces your fingers without hesitation. The touch seems to offer him some more comfort that helps calm his small hiccups and cries. “Is Y-Yeosang okay?”

“He’s alright, yeah,” you whisper back through a smile. “Misses you something awful, but he’s here too. He tried to get to you first, but they must have sent someone else to him. Jongho came as well. To get you. We came to get you, Wooyoung.”

Those words make Wooyoung’s eyes well up with sickening haste. He sinks to the bed before another sob forces its way out, and you sit down beside him like the mattress might collapse if you move too quickly.

“I’m so glad. So fucking g-glad. Being in a pl-place like this without Yeosang — it’s fucking hell.” Wooyoung sinks his teeth into his lower lip just to keep it from trembling.

“Have you…” Surely it’s not a question you have any right to ask, and part of you feels like Wooyoung did need your help but merely did not want to bring you to this place, even if just to watch through his eyes. Still, you swallow the nerves and force the question out. “Have they made you work yet?”

“It’s not important whether they did or not,” Wooyoung says through a weak smile, but that tells you all you need to know. It sounds too rehearsed and monotonous, like he’s been told to say this even if only by himself. “B-But what’s the plan? How are we getting out? Is someone coming to get us?”

“Um, we’re to wait the allotted time here until we get news from one of Hongjoong’s contacts here. He’s a hacker, and he’ll take care of the surveillance system so that we can open the window and get out that way. We’ll meet Yeosang and Jongho in an alleyway not too far from here after that. Then head back to the ship on a transport car.”

“Thought of everything, huh?”

“I sure hope so.”

“It should work just fine. We’re on the second floor though, so it’ll be quite the fall. Just remember to not go face-first.” Wooyoung’s smile is infectious, and you laugh along with his jest, hand squeezing around his. “How is Seonghwa doing?”

“A-Ah, I nearly forgot you knew about that. Um, he’s alright but Hongjoong didn’t think he was well enough to come on the mission with us.”

“Captain is up then? Yeosang mentioned he’d been out for quite some time because of his injuries. That’s great news that he’s up! I — he’ll be happy to hear that I have some info about where Mingi and San are being held too. I can tell him when we’re back on the ship. B-But Seonghwa is okay otherwise?”

“Yunho said there’s no lingering signs of health issues so he’ll be okay physically. I… I have so many questions that I don’t even know where to begin.” Wooyoung’s smile stretches a bit wider.

“I assumed you would. That’s okay though; we have a full hour to use anyways, so you can ask me anything while we have the time to be alone together. I would say we could do it later when we’re back on the ship but Yeosang probably won’t let me out of his sight for even two seconds from now on. It’d be best for us to get it all out now so we don’t have to hear him scribbling in that damn notebook of his.” Wooyoung can’t hide his elation despite the teasing words, and you know that getting to see Yeosang again soon means more to him than you could ever understand. Yeosang must be feeling the same way himself, waiting out this hour with painstaking patience.

“What happened in the days you didn’t let me in? You went quiet for so long I was getting worried.”

“Ah, we shouldn’t start there,” Wooyoung murmurs, glancing down at the floor. He pauses. The breath of hesitation leaves your stomach in knots. “Nothing you want to hear, I promise. That’s why I didn’t try to bring you in. It wasn’t anything pretty, but I assure you there was nothing they could do to hurt me physically. I’m too far gone for that sort of torture. It’s… over and done with now. More scars to add to my collection, and more for Yeosang to cry over probably. We’ll both be fine. You’re probably wondering about the whole connection thing and us both being Sirens and such, right?”

“I — admittedly yes, but looking back now it seems almost obvious? I can’t believe I didn’t see it sooner, I guess. But yeah, specifically that connection or whatever it is. Yeosang said he didn’t know much at all about it.”

“Right, yeah, I don’t know much myself either, to be honest.” Wooyoung presses his lips into a pout. “It’s hard to say what exactly it is. Seonghwa’s books don’t really have anything about this sort of occurrence, but what I’ve gathered from it so far is probably all that Yeosang told you. ‘There’s no place in the universe that you can hide from each other’. Daichi told me that once.”

“He told me the same actually.”

“Mhm, I think he knows a bit more about it than he claims to. For me, I can almost hear you in my head when you’re in distress, even when you’re far away. Except it doesn’t sound like you’re scared or anything like that. It almost sounds as though you’re softly singing to me? Like… I’m on a boat with gentle waves and you’re singing to me through the water. When I’m asleep and dreaming and you reach out to me for help, I can close my eyes and find myself on a boat like that. A white boat on a black lake. And I hear you singing to me in the water, look down, and see a tiny flickering light through the darkness. For years I’ve had that dream.”

“Yeosang… he talked about you having such a dream. Swimming in a black lake and trying to reach someone but not being able to?”

“Yeah! Um, I’ve woken him up so much because of that very dream. I would have that dream time and time again before you joined the crew, desperately swimming to reach you but it was like something was blocking me from getting to you. Like I could never reach you no matter how fast I was. I would never be able to get in. Then suddenly — one night I did, and I woke up in a box of fabrics in the cargo bay.” Wooyoung shifts to look you in the eye, a weak laugh slipping through his lips. “That feels so long ago now.”

“I’ve been wondering how to thank you for that,” you murmur. “If not for that moment, I would have died.” The skin around your nails suddenly seems a lot more interesting, and you busy yourself with picking at it mindlessly rather than looking back in Wooyoung’s direction. He doesn’t let your hand drift far from his though before he’s tugging it right back into his grasp. His other hand finds its way atop yours as well, holding your joined ones together tightly.

“I didn’t do it to get a thank you. It was just… the right thing to do. It’s sad that we live in such a bad and awful society where you feel the need to thank me for doing something as simple as that.”

“Did you not thank Yeosang for saving his life once upon a time?” You dare to ask. Wooyoung is a bit startled at first, caught off-guard by both your sudden question and the content behind it, but he laughs loud and clear without restraint.

“For someone who claims to hate talking about his life, he sure does talk a lot, doesn’t he?” Wooyoung brushes his bang out of his eyes, pushing the strands that have quickly grown unruly and long to the side. “Yeosang never lets me thank him. Any time I’ve tried, he shut me down before I could finish. Honestly, he saved my life twice. Once when he chose me from that lineup of slaves and spared me a crueler fate, and once when he broke those chains and set me free.”

Chose… me…? Then it wasn’t Yeosang’s mother who picked Wooyoung out for him?

You don’t get to dwell on that thought for long because Wooyoung simply continues to ramble, more and more peace coming to his shoulders as he calms down further.

“Yeosang only ever thanks me. As odd as that is.”

“Did you — have you ever saved his life then?” You already know the answer to that question, but it’s already hanging in the air between you by the time you catch yourself.

“Yes.” Wooyoung is beaming by now, lips stretched wide as he grins. “I got him out of prison when they charged him with treason.”

“And that’s what he thanks you for?”

Wooyoung’s smile doesn’t falter even as he shakes his head in denial.

“He never claims to have saved me, not even once. Instead, Yeosang says that I saved him.”

“B-But why? Objectively he did save you, so why does he not acknowledge that?”

“Because, Y/N, there’s a difference between loving someone and being in love with someone. Yeosang and I loved each other for many years before. But just loving each other wasn’t enough for Crown Prince Kang Minhee to break my chains and commit treason. When ”I love you“ turns into ”I am in love with you“ and ”I am in love with the mere idea of you“, then Yeosang set me free. Even though I would never have asked him to do it, he chose to on his own accord. So he thanks me and says that I saved him because of that. Because I trusted him enough to put my life in his hands time and time again and let him fall in love with me. He claims it to be a difficult thing — allowing an Elitist to fall in love with you. But with Yeosang… he has only ever made it easy. There are times where it is difficult and frustrating, where I wish that he could be anything other than an Elitist, for fuck’s sake, times when I would rather break his neck in an absolutely non-sexy kind of way, but that’s part of love and loving someone. That’s why he’s grateful to me. It sounds selfish and egotistical to say, but after having him repeat himself for so many years, I’ve grown to accept that even if I don’t believe I deserve it.” Wooyoung speaks with a raw conviction that you’ve heard before. It’s the same tone Hongjoong used when speaking to Seonghwa in the medbay, the same tone Yeosang used when talking about Wooyoung and their past together.

Even if you wanted to formulate a response, you don’t think you would be able to because of how overwhelming the emotion in Wooyoung’s voice is. He’s had every opportunity to blame Yeosang for the misfortune in his life, claim that if only Yeosang hadn’t picked him from the start he would be better off, claim that Yeosang got him out of being a slave only to put him in a more dangerous position. Wooyoung could even blame Yeosang for not protecting him well enough to keep him from being kidnapped and tortured.

Yet not once has Wooyoung blamed him.

Perhaps you were being unfair in pushing the blame onto Seonghwa’s shoulders when he didn’t fight your decision to go with Jisung. Is it so wrong to want someone to fight for you? Yet Yeosang has fought every day for Wooyoung and continues to do so. Wooyoung, who has been through hell and tortures he does not wish to speak about, asked about Yeosang’s well-being before anything else. Yet if they were in your position — if Wooyoung were the one agreeing to go with Jisung to save the others, would Yeosang not drop everything to fight for him?

Your mind screams back at you, telling you that it’s different, the situations aren’t the same, the relationships aren’t the same, and you cannot compare yourself to people like Wooyoung and Yeosang who have had years to figure this out. And so, you don’t compare yourself to them.

Rather you compare Seonghwa and Hongjoong to them. How Seonghwa’s worst nightmare is not being able to save Hongjoong from himself. The sheer will and determination in Hongjoong’s eyes when he said he would never let Seonghwa’s demons overtake him. You can’t help but wonder if perhaps that is similar to what Wooyoung and Yeosang have. Neither are anything remotely close to what you have — had, your mind suggests ever so helpfully — with Seonghwa yourself.

“It may be selfish, but I don’t want you to push me away. I would rather be hurt and still have you in my life rather than to be perfectly fine without you.”

That memory slips through unannounced and unasked for, and the mere prospect of why it’s coming back to you while you’re having such thoughts scares you so much that you slam the door in that memory’s face and throw away the key before it breaks loose.

“But anyway that’s — I rambled a bit too much, that’s not the point, um, have you ever had similar dreams like those? The ones I had, I mean? Before waking up in my body or before you came to the crew, any time you can remember. I know you haven’t had much opportunity yet, but you’ve had a few experiences by now.”

“I can’t recall ever having those sorts of dreams. That dream you mentioned about the lake — I had a dream that I was drowning in a black lake the night you came to save Seonghwa, but when I wake up in your body, it’s simply that. All I know is falling asleep and waking up like a passenger in your consciousness. I don’t have any control like you’ve had over my body.” Wooyoung’s eyes are oh so expectant and pleading, and it twists something painful in your gut. You want so badly to have information for him, to be able to give him answers or even a hint as to what could be going on, but frankly, you have nothing to offer. “I’m sorry, Wooyoung. I-I feel utterly useless in this whole situation. I d-don’t know what’s wrong with me or my head, I just can’t remember at all and I don’t… You and Seonghwa seem to have this whole Siren thing figured out, how it works, what sort of abilities you have, how to use them. I, on the other hand, have so many gaps and missing pieces in my memories. I’ve had one or two moments where I consciously used some sort of ability, then Seonghwa tried to help me learn, but other than that I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“It’s okay!” Wooyoung rushes to reassure you, squeezing his hand tight around yours as he smiles again. “Y/N, please don’t worry about that. I don’t expect you to have an answer right now, it’s really okay. We’re gonna figure this out together now that you finally know what I am and we’ll be back on the ship soon. And I can help you understand more about being a Siren in general too! If we can get to the Dreamscape together, maybe Daichi will be willing to talk.”

“Last time I was there, he tried to kill me and told me that if I kept asking questions he would end my life,” you snort. Wooyoung’s smile drops into a grave expression that doesn’t fit his features.

“In the beginning — when I first started seeing Daichi, that is — he wasn’t like that. He wanted me to find other Sirens. That’s what ultimately made Yeosang choose Captain’s crew because Daichi had told me there was a Siren there. Then as more time went on, Daichi seemed to get more and more frightened by the idea of Sirens finding each other. He started telling me that someone dangerous would find me, someone I should guard myself from.”

“He warned me of the same when I first came aboard. But Seonghwa mentioned how Daichi’s job is to guide Sirens to each other?”

“That’s true, yes, but Daichi seems to have changed his mind along the way. I can’t understand why, but I’m sure it will make it a lot more difficult to find two more for Captain.” Your conversation dies a bit there, leaving both you and Wooyoung to stew over the predicament. According to Daichi, you spent years denying your identity and refusing to listen to him, so you never made an effort to find any Sirens like both Wooyoung and Seonghwa have been apparently. Still, it leaves you more curious than before, especially given what all happened in your latest escapade in the Dreamscape.

“Tsukio can find you anywhere, even while far away! This mental connection you share, this link — the two of you are a dyad, a yin and a yang, a pair that cannot be severed. No matter how far apart you are, the two of you will always be able to come back to each other.”

“Did he ever tell you that we will always be able to come back to each other?”

“Come… back to each other? No, I’ve never heard him say such a thing before.”

“I remember seeing you in a dream before, not the Dreamscape but an actual dream. But that dream felt more like a memory, and I asked you about it once in the medbay. I know you told me no then, but does it have anything to do with what Daichi said possibly?”

“Hm, I suppose it could?” Wooyoung leans back and looks up at the ceiling. You can’t figure out what’s on his mind just through his expression, and what he says next doesn’t help much either. “But I don’t have any sort of memory like that.”

“You — you were wiped with a serum too, weren’t you?”

“Did Yeosang tell you that as well?” Wooyoung asks through a frown. “Did he mention how guilty he feels about that too? Probably, that would be very much like him to do so. Guilty for things that aren’t even his fault… but yes. Yes, my memories were wiped too.”

“I have another question. I’m sorry for asking so much all at once. Yeosang never gave me a clear answer though, so I’m still curious, but why haven’t you told Hongjoong about this?” Wooyoung doesn’t answer right away. Instead, he sinks his teeth into his lower lip and refuses to look your way for a bit. The silence drags but it’s nothing uncomfortable or unsettling. It isn’t like you’re on a time crunch right now either, so you’re more than willing to wait until he is ready to speak.

“It’s something stupid and selfish honestly,” he whispers after a bit. His other hand finds purchase on the bed, picking at a loose thread hanging off the sheets. “I didn’t expect Yeosang to take it so seriously, but now he’s adamant even when I try to tell him otherwise. Really it’s just that when I was still a slave, I didn’t always have to wear the collar. It dampened and muted my abilities so I couldn’t use them freely. Shocked me a lot too whenever I foolishly tried to use them without permission, leaving some really ugly and awful scars. Yeosang always treated the wounds when that would happen.”

His hand travels up to touch the band of metal hanging about his neck. You follow the movement with your eyes. You can’t miss the spreading scars underneath the metal as he shifts it, like little lightning bolts of pale skin hiding beneath it, and you wonder if that’s what you felt the first time you woke up in his body.

“I have a lot of scars from lots of different things. It shouldn’t be any different, and it shouldn’t even matter because it’s stupid and childish and I need to get over it. Even though the collar is dead and doesn’t work, like it doesn’t mute my abilities anymore or anything like that, just the idea of having it on keeps me sane. Being a Siren is both a blessing and a curse. Some abilities you’re born with are crueler than imaginable and can be used to do horrific things. The things I was forced to do with mine are not something I ever want to revisit again. So… I keep the collar on because the trauma I suffered while wearing it for so many years keeps me sane. Merely the idea of wearing it prevents me from using my abilities because I was conditioned into a state where if I tried doing anything while the collar was on, I would be hurt. When it comes to visiting you, it’s different because I’m asleep when that happens. And whenever people other than Yeosang or myself try to touch it, I get thrown back into the memories of his father taking it off me to use me as a weapon and I-I can’t — it’s too much to bear.

“I trust Hongjoong. I really trust him and admire him and respect him so much. As much as I do Yeosang even if it’s in a different way. But I have an innate fear of authority that tells me no matter who it is, the people who have power over me will abuse it. That if anyone above me knows I’m a Siren, I’ll be used again, and I’m afraid of that. So it’s not that I don’t want to tell Hongjoong. Just that as long as I have this collar on and as long as these demons linger at the edge of my mind, I don’t think I can ever tell him what I am.”

You want to express an apology for bringing those memories back or at least offer an ounce of consolation because you can almost feel the pain radiating off his body in waves. But the moment you reach out to pull him into a hug, the door to your room slides open out of nowhere. You jerk, and Wooyoung lifts an arm to protect the both of you, but you take the initiative in pushing him down to the bed. In one swift movement, you climb in front of him, one knee down on the mattress and the other stretched out in front of Wooyoung’s body. The blade against your thigh is cool on your fingertips, but you don’t pull it out quite yet. The flash of red hair before you stops you at the last second.

Soojin?

The girl is already halfway in the room, door sliding shut behind her, and the second it’s fully closed, she turns to twist the lock into place.

“W-Wait, we’re n-not supposed to lock the doors!” Wooyoung protests, leaning up over your shoulder to see better. Soojin levels him with a sharp glare. You reach behind you to push Wooyoung back enough so that he’s hidden behind your shoulder, matching Soojin’s stare with equal intensity. The girl steps closer to you, draws a single finger up, and stabs you hard in the chest with her dull nail.

“You and me need to have a chat after all it seems.”

“What do you mean?” You clench your fingers around the handle of your knife, still not completely at ease with the woman standing in front of you.

“What do I mean? I mean that my fucking client downstairs just tried to fucking murder me and gave me a message from Han Jisung of all people! Seeing you and hearing from that bastard on the same day after being free from that past for several years? That’s no fucking coincidence, Y/N.”

“Murder!? How did you — how did you get away?”

A laugh of disbelief escapes Soojin’s lips as she pulls back a few feet.

“I killed him, of course! What else was I supposed to do? I dumped the fucker’s body out the window for staff to clean up later. This sort of thing happens frequently enough for them not to question it, and besides, I told them it was a jealous worker so they won’t really care all too much about him. But what the fuck is going on? Why are you here and why did Han Jisung just tell me my time is up and try to have me killed?”

“I… I-I don’t — I’m not with Jisung, I know nothing about that at all. He—” You cut yourself short with a sharp inhale, eyes darting across the floor like it has all the answers in it. “Wait, he knew I would be coming here though. Did he know that you worked here?”

“Unfortunately, not by choice though. We ran across each other around a year ago in the city, and I mentioned working at the House in passing.”

You shift to motion back at Wooyoung and pull your hand off the knife on your leg at last.

“He was brought here against his will by Jisung. Well, whoever Jisung is working with at least. I only came to get him out. We’re — he’s part of the crew I’m working with now. Jisung knew where he would be and that I would come to get him.”

“And he’s still a psychopath when it comes to you then?” Soojin scoffs, brows knitting together to accentuate her disbelief. “He tried to have me killed just so that I would stay out of your business?”

“I don’t know, Soojin,” you exhale. “It doesn’t make any sense why he would do that. I already made a deal with him and he’ll get to take me regardless of what happens here.”

“T-Take you?” Wooyoung interjects. “Take you where?” His hand latches around your elbow and squeezes hard. You ignore the man in favor of maintaining your focus on Soojin, however, much to his dismay.

“Unless you know something Jisung wouldn’t want me to know and he couldn’t even risk the thought of us running into each other and speaking.” At that, Soojin tilts her head to the side in confusion.

“What could I possibly know that you don’t?”

“What happened before you left the crew?” Her confusion intensifies to a dramatic degree.

“Have you gone mad? Do you not remember or something? You were always a bit bad with memory, yeah, but has it gotten this bad?”

“Please, Soojin, I’m begging you please just tell me what happened before the crew fell apart. I know you called me a scapegoat for a reason, please.” You reach out across the empty space between your bodies, having to stand to reach her, but when you do, you close a hand around her wrist. Soojin blinks between where you hold her and your face without speaking for so long that you think she’s going to refuse you again.

“I called you a scapegoat because I thought you were in on Jisung’s plan at the time,” she says finally, pulling her other hand up to run through her hair. “You would’ve done anything for him so I thought that was just another part of it.”

“What did I do?”

“I should be asking what you remember happening instead.”

“What I remember is stealing documents and plotting to dismantle the military from the inside out with you guys but I fucked up. I know I fucked up and got caught and Hyunwoo took the blame for me and it got him fucking executed.” Soojin leans back, hand tugging out of your light grip.

“I know nothing of what happened after Ash, Juyeon, and I left Eros. But before we left…” It’s her turn to hold you by the wrist. She turns your arm over and exposes the inside of your left arm, right where that damned brand sits against your raised skin. “You didn’t deserve this. It wasn’t your burden to bear. You were the scapegoat, and that’s why the team fell apart, that’s why we all broke up and ran away. You didn’t plan to steal anything, nor did you plot a thing. Neither did Hyunwoo. It was all Jisung; Jisung wanted to dismantle the military and kill the king. When Juyeon, Ash, and I found out what he was planning to do, we brought it to Hyunwoo. All Hyunwoo said was that stopping Jisung wasn’t something he could do. So he told us to leave while we still had the chance and that he would take care of things. He would take the blame so that no one else would have to get hurt. But you didn’t want him to do that, so you ran off and carried out Jisung’s plan for him.”

“Which part? Did I k-kill the king… before Hyunwoo died?”

Soojin heaves a deep sigh.

“The last night we were all together as a team, you snuck out of the barracks and infiltrated the palace. You stole the documents Jisung wanted — whatever the fuck they were because I don’t even know why he wanted them in the first place if he was going to kill the king anyways — and you killed the king that night too. Everything went to shit. It all happened too fast for the rest of us to know what was really going on. You just came back to the barracks and turned the lights on and…”

You don’t realize how hard your head is pounding until the woman trails off, voice dying in her throat, and then it hits you will so much force that you feel your body beginning to lurch. You would fall over, most likely smack your head on the sink as well, if not for Wooyoung jumping up and catching you by the waist before you can fully go down. And thanks to him, all you do is hunch over and hold your head in your hands as a stab of pain sears through your skull.

“Breathe, Y/N, breathe for me,” he urges as you slump your weight back against him. “You need to breathe, okay? You’re hyperventilating. One breath every five seconds, slow it down, you’re okay.”

“Th-There was blood. There was blood, wasn’t there?” Looking at Soojin fills your vision with pure crimson, but it’s not because of her hair this time.

“Yes,” she whispers back, not daring to speak any louder than that. “You were… drenched in blood that wasn’t yours. And we were so scared you had been hurt somehow. I carried you to the bath and cleaned you but you didn’t have a single scratch on you.”

“O-Oh god,” you choke out. The red in your vision turns coppery as a different image takes over and a new memory swarms your head.

“What the fuck did you do!?”

Hands squeezing hard around your throat, shoving you under bloody waters.

“Let her go!”

“You ruined everything! How could you do this? Why are you so fucking useless? I told you to sit still and not do anything!”

The water spread to your nostrils and forced its way in as you struggled to find air.

“Jisung, release her right this instant!”

The hands around your throat just grew tighter.

Wooyoung eases you down to the floor when the rest of your strength leaves you. He keeps a hand at your waist, using the other to hold your head to his chest in a desperate attempt to control the wild tremors shooting through your body. You keep a hand pressed to your throbbing temple but it does nothing to alleviate the pain you’re in, one that feels as though something is trying to rip your head in half with their bare hands.

“C-Can’t remember more. I can’t, I do-don’t want to remember anymore, I — it hurts. It hurts too much, it hurts so much.”

“Shh, it’s okay, it’s okay. You don’t have to remember anymore, okay? You’re good, you’re done, no more. No more.” Even through the pain, you can’t miss the desperation in Wooyoung’s tone. His hand moves for your arm where your wristband sits, buzzing uselessly against your skin. “Y/N, what does this mean? Is something happening?”

You want to answer, You even open your mouth to do so. Yet the moment you do, the taste of that metallic soapy water fills your mouth and you choke on air.

“Y/N, please, what does it mean? Are we in trouble?” You think you shake your head but the panic in Wooyoung’s eyes isn’t reassuring and you aren’t sure you have any hold over the muscles in your body right now. “Please, do you know where our friend is?” He asks, directing his focus to where Soojin kneels in front of you.

“The brunette?”

“Brunette? No, no, I’m talking a blond?”

“J-Jongho,” you force out, gritting your teeth until your jaw hurts from the force. “Jongho… here too.”

“I saw that name on the register,” Soojin cuts in. “I checked it to find what room you were in and saw his name further down on the list.”

“Please get him and bring him. Please, I know you — we just need your help right now, please,” Wooyoung begs. His grip on your waist tightens a little as Soojin hesitates, and it doesn’t let up until the girl nods and leaves the room in haste. Wooyoung brings you back to his chest once she’s gone, matching your shaky breaths as he gently rocks you back and forth. “I can’t… know your memories or the pain you’re feeling right now, but I know what it’s like to suddenly be hit with memories you forgot you had. Ones that were suppressed behind an iron wall. I know what it’s like to have it slip out and hit you.”

“It fucking hurts.” You clench your jaw again, feeling a burn of pain up the side of your face with the movement. “Like someone is stabbing my b-brain with a da-damn icepick.”

“Are the memories painful?”

“I d-don’t know. I can hardly think straight. My head hurts. That’s all I can think about.”

“The serum… I’m assuming it’s the same one I was given back then. It can’t take away memories. Yeah, they tell you that it’s a wipe, but that’s only because they don’t want you trying to find those old memories. It can’t remove parts of the brain like that. They just use it to lock away memories but there’s no guarantee of it being permanent, so when you do remember something they tried to lock away, it hurts.”

“D-Does it hurt you like this too?”

“Yes, but I’m — pain isn’t something that bothers me all too much, and I’m lucky enough to have Yeosang nearby when it happens. I’ve got a prescription for the pain from Yunho too. We can… we can get you something long-term back on the ship.”

Another stab of pain hits as the door slides open, metal grating hard on your ears, but this time Jongho stands with Soojin. He rushes over to join you and Wooyoung on the floor in a panic, obviously torn between being excited to see Wooyoung again and your current crumpled state.

“Yeosang’s hour is up and he’s waiting at the meeting point. Captain hasn’t buzzed in on the contact yet.” Jongho reaches down to lay a hand against your forehead. You’re quick enough to turn your face further into Wooyoung’s shirt, inhaling the sickening floral scent that clings to his skin.

“Don’t even think about trying to take it away,” you hiss.

“I can’t take physical pain, don’t worry. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Here, something for the pain.” Soojin interrupts the moment to lean over you with a cup of unknown contents. “Fast-acting pain reliever. Every room has some in it just in case patrons get too out of hand. We keep it in the cabinets, I promise it’s nothing bad. It’ll numb you and make you a bit sluggish for a while, but it’ll also take the pain away.”

“Thank you,” Wooyoung murmurs as he takes the cup from her hands. He helps bring the cup to your lips, pushing some of the murky grey liquid inside into your mouth, and you struggle not to gag around the taste of it. He doesn’t stop until the entirety of its contents are drained into your mouth then tilts your head back to keep it down when some threatens to drip out the corners of your lips. An unknown hand comes down on your knee.

“Y/N, I’m so sorry.” Soojin. “I didn’t mean to hurt you with this information.” You swallow hard only to choke a second later on the putrid aftertaste clinging to your tongue. Wooyoung lets you cough into his shoulder without complaint, passing the now empty cup back to Soojin.

“You couldn’t have known,” you murmur after escaping the coughing fit. “It’s not your fault.”

“I didn’t know what they would do to you after we left the planet,” she sighs through the quiet of the room. “I should have expected it honestly, knowing Jisung, but maybe I hoped he would be better than that. He always manipulated you so it only makes sense that he would try to manipulate your memories too. Do you at least know what happened a little bit better now?”

“Y-Yeah, yeah.” You try to pull away from Wooyoung and get up but his grip on you doesn’t let up. “My memories were taken away for a second time and replaced with something else. So instead of only losing fourteen years of my life, I lost eighteen and spent the last three years believing those manipulated memories to be real. I’m peachy.”

Another buzz from your wristband pulls your attention away, and Jongho glances down at his own too.

“Cameras are down.”

“Let’s go then,” you mutter.

“Are you okay to move? Don’t push it if you’re not strong enough.”

“We need to go now while we still can,” you protect, letting Wooyoung help you to your feet even if it’s on shaky legs. Jongho gives a curt nod then heads for the window, no doubt to pry it open. Soojin catches you by the arm before you can fully turn away.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. Even if you can’t remember all of it, there are still things I regret saying and doing to you. I should have known back then how much Jisung was manipulating you and not pushed so much blame onto your shoulders.”

“You can get out now with us, Soojin. While you have the chance.”

“And do what with that freedom?” She huffs out a dry and lifeless laugh. “Wander aimlessly? Ash and Juyeon are both missing in action. I have no clues or leads on where they might be or if they’re even alive. I don’t have anything left out there beyond the House.”

“I��� if I hear anything out there about them, I promise I’ll send you a message. I’ll find a way to get news to you, maybe through my captain’s contact or something. I swear if I can help you get out of this hellhole I will.”

Soojin reaches up to ruffle her hand through your hair, mussing the loose locks more.

“You always were a good kid, Y/N. Too good for the life you were forced to live.” It hurts to watch her smile. It hurts even more to let Wooyoung guide you to where Jongho waits by the now open window. “Go while you can, you three. The medicine will wear off in a few hours, but hopefully, you’ll have access to something better by then. I’ll make sure you get out safely.”

Jongho dips through the open space first, hopping down to the pristine streets below with little issue.

“Send Y/N down next!”

You can’t tear your gaze off Soojin. You don’t know when you might see her again or if you even will, and it hurts to leave her behind like this but she just keeps smiling at you with bright eyes and blinding hair.

“T-Thank you, Soojin. Please stay safe, if you can.”

“Always.”

With that, Wooyoung hoists you over the ledge of the window and dangles you far enough down so that your fall is softened a bit. Jongho catches you by the legs, taking the brunt of your weight before you hit the ground. Wooyoung drops down beside you without warning a second later. As Jongho eases you down, you dare to glance up at the window you just left from, and it shuts slowly without a sign from Soojin inside.

Wooyoung rushes back to your side and loops an arm back around your waist when you start to slump forward again.

“That’s — that’ll look too suspicious,” you mutter, pulling his arm back to his own side.

“We just dropped out a fucking window. I’m sure that would look more suspicious.”

“I’ll be okay.”

Yet two steps later, you’re stumbling over your heels and Jongho comes to your rescue this time. He tugs your arm through his own as he walks forward without saying a word. You can only lean your weight on him and slump your chin against his shoulder.

“Thank you…”

Silence drapes over the three of you as you make your way to the meeting point with Yeosang. You aren’t in as much pain as you were earlier (Soojin wasn’t bluffing when she said fast-acting) but the medicine is already making you a bit groggy. It feels a bit like you’re wading through sludge just trying to walk a few steps, and frankly, Jongho is the only thing keeping you going at this point. Wooyoung lingers at your other side. Every once in a while, you feel his worried gaze find its way to your form. He might even be speaking to you at some point because you hear something that sounds vaguely like his voice through the radio static in your ears, but there is far too much on your mind and too much to think about right now for you to pay any attention to that.

If… if I killed the king before Hyunwoo’s execution, then who did I kill that night? Did I kill anyone at all? Was that memory fabricated? What have I been working towards all these years if that’s a lie?

Funny how your search for answers only left you with more questions instead. There are too many questions to keep track of and not remotely enough answers to them. You know you won’t be able to have those answers yet either, not while San and Mingi are still missing and Jisung is bothering you. Where would you even look for answers now? Jisung would never tell you a thing, Hyunwoo is dead and gone, and now you’re leaving Soojin behind.

The one thing that reaches your brain through the static in your ears is a dry and choked sob. You pull yourself out of your thoughts as Wooyoung disappears from your side. It doesn’t take much to guess why. You’ve reached the meeting point, the all too small alleyway where Yeosang waits for you three, and Wooyoung is running straight to him with reckless abandon.

“Y-Yeosang, angel, Yeosang, my god I’m—” Wooyoung’s voice dies in a cracked sob when he reaches the Elitist. His hands barely brush the man’s shoulders because Yeosang drops to his knees in front of Wooyoung, face hidden but no doubt bearing tears, and he balls his fists around the flimsy material of Wooyoung’s pants. He presses his forehead to Wooyoung’s hip, hands traveling further up to press against the small of his back. Wooyoung can only card a hand through Yeosang’s hair in response, but it’s enough for now. It’s enough for both of them like this, with Yeosang’s knuckles white from the pressure of clinging to Wooyoung, and you and Jongho maintain your distance as best you can to give them this moment.

“Are they happy?” You whisper to Jongho even though the answer is blindingly obvious before you. The Berserker’s lips twist into a small grin.

“I don’t think there’s a word strong enough to describe how they’re feeling right now.”

Yeosang pulls his head off Wooyoung’s hip and stares up at the man with tears on his cheeks and stars in his eyes. Wooyoung dips down to the Elitist’s height, pulling his face up to his own and slotting their lips together like nothing else in the universe exists around them. Again, it’s raw, as all emotions between these two seem to be, but it belongs to them and it’s something you can’t take away from them. When they part lips to gulp in desperate breaths of fresh air, Wooyoung places his forehead over Yeosang’s and takes the breath from his lungs like that. They don’t exchange words but there doesn’t seem to be a need for words either, not until Yeosang seems to catch hold of himself and come back to his senses.

“The car is waiting for us at the other end of the alley. Driver’s already pulled up.” Jongho nods when the Elitist drags his gaze over to where the two of you stand. Yeosang lets Wooyoung pull him back into space after that, unable to contain a smile as the Siren continues to press more kisses to his cheeks. You and Jongho trail behind them to the other end of the alleyway. Seeing them together like this makes it worth it. You knew it would and you were striving to bring them this moment, but seeing it unfold before you like this increases that feeling tenfold.

Once in the car, Yeosang sits Wooyoung down in one of the cushioned seats then drops to the floor between his legs even when Wooyoung protests and tells him to get up.

“Stop, that’s weird! It looks weird, Yeo, please! It looks like you’re trying to su—”

“Shut up,” Yeosang mumbles back as he drops his head to rest against Wooyoung’s thigh. “You’re the one who makes everything dirty. Get your head out of the gutter.”

Wooyoung obviously doesn’t mind all too much because he returns to toying with the Elitist’s blond locks moments later as you and Jongho settle into the seats beside the pair. And from where you’re sitting, they really do look like young boys again, more than just a former slave and ex-prince but also less than that. Just… boys who fell in love despite the odds set against them.

“I’m sorry, Woo, I’m so sorry.”

“Shh, angel, I know. It’s okay. We’re okay.”

You tune out of the conversation there. It’s far too intimate and personal for you to encroach on, and the medicine has you falling asleep in your seat anyways. Jongho seems to pick up on that, reaching over to pat your leg.

“Rest while you can.”

A hum comes as your reply as you slump to the side, head hitting the side of the car with a loud thud. Jongho exhales a quiet laugh and pulls you over to rest against his shoulder instead.

“’m sorry for snapping at you,” you murmur. You’re forcing your eyes to stay open long enough to get the apology out but it’s growing more difficult by the second. “I didn’t mean to, I was afraid… of her slipping out of my grasp but… that’s no excuse.”

Your fluttering eyes snap wide open when something presses down hard on your nose. You blink uselessly at Jongho and the finger he hovers over your face.

“Stop talking nonsense, yeah? Rest. I’m not going anywhere.”

“You’re not?”

“Hm, no, I’m not.”

“Promise.”

“I promise I’m staying right here.”

“And we’ll get San back?” You mumble just before the drowsiness wins.

“We’ll get your San back too, I promise.”

✧✧✧ a/n: yall imma be honest this chapter feels like a whole fever dream and a half but i love it nonetheless she’s my Baby i hope you guys love her just as much and enjoy her <3 lots happened but also not a lot happened? i feel like the wc is so dramatic for Not A Lot but yaknow that’s life ! next chapter we’re getting juicy and bringing a part 16 move back bc teehee that’s what i do best u know me anywho let me know what u think as always i love u all im so happy to bring u guys this chapter and so excited for the coming ones!

taglist: @faeriewoobin​​ @sugarrimajins​​ @atinyinwonderland​​ ​@sparklychangbin​ @jeong-uwu​​ @jeonartemis​​ @anothershorthuman​​ @xxbluestrifexx​​​ @haotheheckk​​ @noonawriter​​ @lostscenarios​​ @nlost21​​ @mirror-juliet​​ @okokokok123-45​ @purple-aeon​ @theoinkypiglet​ @toothlessshiber​ @atinyarmyx1​ @simpforhyunjin​ @hwangwoosan​ @vampire-jimin​ @softyubi​ @drumboydowoon​ @chatsgotmytongue​ @just-a-starfruit​ @babydolljo​ @scintillating-souls​ @khjssss​​ @rawrrainn​ @hewwo-from-the-other-side​ @icekdy​ @eggteez​​ @bangtanxberm​​ @uglychildd​ @lucymultistan​​​​

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

[wxnderlustfandoms]

not a villain [loki x teen!reader]

[not my gif]

pairing: loki x teen! reader (platonic), avengers x teen!reader (platonic) 

description: you try to make loki feel more welcome after thor brings him to the compound, thinking it would be good for him. he thinks you’re just trying to get on his good side for selfish reasons, but after overhearing you defend him to the avengers, he realizes you see the good in him

word count: 2291

warnings: none really. 

a/n: not me taking this description straight from my shifting script and turning it into a fanfic lmfao

in a way a continuation of this headcannon because the reader’s powers are the same and its the same backstory. 

After the fight at the airport between the avengers, they all realized how stupid the accords were and how it provided them no freedoms to do the things they needed to. However, you pointed out that the idea of an accords was okay because if we’re being honest, the avengers didn’t really think about collateral. The avengers all met with the countries that made the accords and worked together to revise them to work the best for both parties. 

Once that was settled, you all moved back into the compound and returned to normal life. Well, as normal as you can get with the avengers. 

One day, you heard a loud booming noise outside and saw a flash of light come from outside. You opened your window and flew out quickly to investigate. When you got closer, you saw a tall blonde with longer hair and a hammer. With him was another tall man with long black hair. A few other avengers were already there and they seemed to be on edge. 

You landed next to them and realized that the blonde was Thor. He was an avenger and you remembered seeing him on tv when New York was getting attacked. 

“I’m sure you all remember my brother, Loki,” Thor introduced, gesturing to the man with black hair next to him. Loki looked about as excited to be there as everyone else was to see him. 

“Wait, wasn’t that the guy who attacked New York? I saw him on TV when I was a little kid,” You asked Sam quietly, whispering towards him. Sam nodded his head and you looked back to Thor confused. 

“Why is he here, Thor?” Tony asked, holding his armor-covered hand up to him, prepared to attack if he needed to. You seemed to be the only one not in a fighting stance, but to be fair, you really didn’t understand what was happening. 

“I believe that it will be good for Loki to come and live with us all here! Who knows, maybe he could even become an avenger with the proper training!” Thor boomed with a smile. You felt yourself smile a bit just looking at him, he radiated so much pure, optimistic, happy energy. 

“Absolutely not, he tried to take over the world, Thor. He killed people,” Natasha argued back.

“My brother may have had a complicated past, but I just know that this will be a good opportunity for him!” 

You didn’t feel as though you were in any place to take a side, as you were not there in New York and did not know anything about Loki, but you felt as though if Loki was here to train to become an avenger, he should be able to. He didn’t seem like a terrible guy. You listened to them go back and forth for a while, discussing things you once again couldn’t input on because you were a child when these things happened. 

Eventually, Thor convinced the rest of the Avengers to let Loki stay with them. However, he was basically on house arrest at the compound until they deemed him trustworthy enough to leave, and Tony made sure to tell Loki how he believed that to be a long, long time. Loki seemed to not be bothered at all, and hadn’t really talked throughout the entire interaction. His brother kind of took the lead and spoke out for him. 

The next week, you didn’t see Loki much around the compound. He seemed to be brooding in his room or something like that. You shrugged and just thought he might be taking his time to get comfortable. 

I mean, he did try to kill a lot of people in this compound. It's got to be awkward to just run into them in the same compound now that he lives with them, You thought, walking into the kitchen. Your wings flexed in surprise when you saw Loki in the kitchen. He looked up when you walked in and he looked like he was going to leave once he was aware of your presence, but you stopped him.

“You don’t have to leave, you know? We both live here and this kitchen is big enough for the two of us,” You said. 

His face didn’t betray what he was thinking, but he didn’t make another move to leave. You got out some ingredients to make a sandwich for yourself and looked over to Loki, who was looking through the cabinet. 

“So… you’re like… a god?” You asked him the question you’d been thinking the whole time since he moved in. 

He looked at you and raised an eyebrow. The look on your face told him you were being serious. 

“Yes,” He responded bluntly. You raised both of your eyebrows in your surprise that you got a verbal answer. 

You hummed, going back to making your sandwich. Loki didn’t seem to find anything he wanted in the cabinet and made his way to leave the kitchen. “See ya, Loki!” You said as he exited. 

The next few weeks went the same way, you running into Loki and initiating conversation with him, trying to get to know things about him. He was very blunt, his answers short. Sometimes he didn’t even answer and the conversations were very one sided but you still didn’t give up trying to get to know him. You knew that because Thor was still taking care of things on Asgard and coming back and forth, he didn’t really have time to check on how Loki was but for a few minutes. And the other avengers made no attempt to socialize with the god. So you decided to. You weren’t sure if they knew you were talking to him all the time, but if they did none of them made an attempt to stop you. They knew you were trusting, but they also knew you weren’t dumb, so they trusted you. 

One day, you caught Thor when he was visiting the compound and asked him what Loki’s favorite earth food was, or if he could bring him some food from Asgard. Thor was surprised a teenager was concerned about Loki, but thanked you for thinking about him. He told you about an Asgard dish that could easily be made with Earth food and you thanked him, going to the kitchen and started making it. When you were done with it, you went to Loki’s room and knocked on his door. It took a minute before he opened it, but he was surprised to see you when he did open it. 

“Hi! I noticed you didn’t seem interested in any of the snacks in the cabinet and haven’t really eaten any good meals since you got here, so I made you something. Thor said it was similar to an Asgardian dish. I’m… not sure exactly which one. It was pronounced weird. But I hope you enjoy it!” You said, handing it to him. He wasn’t sure how to respond, so he just looked at the dish and then back up at you. 

“Anyway, I hope you have a good day, Loki!” You told him, walking back to clean up your mess in the kitchen. 

Loki stood there with the door open, looking at the dish. His thoughts were jumbled and he couldn’t figure you out. What could you possibly want from him that would make you try so hard to get on his good side? He appreciated the gesture, but he didn’t trust that it was just out of the kindness of your heart.

Later that week, you were hanging out with a majority of the avengers in a lounge room, TV on in the background, but you all were mostly just talking. 

The topic of Loki got brought up quickly. They started talking about still not being able to trust him and how awkward it is he lives at the compound now. Usually you wouldn't say anything because you didn’t feel like it's your place but you just had to this time. 

“Well maybe, if you guys even tried to talk to Loki, you would know he’s not a terrible person,” You defended. 

Bruce laughed, “Are we talking about the same man that mind controlled Clint and made me go all hulk mode on everyone?” 

Clint agreed. 

“Jesus,” You stood up, wings ruffled in anger.

“[Y/n], why are you getting so defensive?” Sam asked. 

You turned around and gave him an annoyed look. “Because you all are sitting here, saying Loki could never be anything but a villain, but won’t stop treating him like he is!” You threw your hands up in defeat. Walking a bit to the right before turning back to them. “Like, how is he supposed to prove to you guys he’s good when you won’t even give him the time of day! I’m not saying to go in trusting him 100%, I know he did bad things in his past. But haven’t we all? Isn’t there some part of our past we wish we could go back and erase because it was a mistake?” You looked to Natasha especially while saying this. 

“[Y/n], I understand what you’re trying to say, but it’s incredibly naive of you to trust Loki, and to compare what he did to any of us,” Clint responded. You looked at him, confused and hurt. Looking to the other people sitting in the room, they agreed, nodding their heads. Your eyes started tearing up. 

“If I’m too ‘young’ and ‘naive’ to understand these things then why am I even an avenger? You can’t sit here and constantly bring up my age and lack of experience when I try to say things just because you don’t think I’m right! If Loki’s villainy in the past never affected you guys personally you wouldn’t be sitting here holding this, what? 5 year grudge against him!?” You felt a few tears fall down your face and you brushed them away, almost angry that they decided to fall when you were trying to talk to your comrades. You were trying to tell them that you don’t want to be treated like a kid, but here you were crying like one. 

“[Y/n]...” Sam started, getting up when he saw you were crying. You shook your head, turning away from them and running back to your room. You collapsed onto your bed and let out a few sobs. 

You weren’t necessarily crying because the avengers didn’t accept Loki. It upset you, but that wasn’t why you were crying. You were crying because this wasn’t the first time they have brought up your age to belittle your opinion or said you were not experienced enough to have an opinion on something. You were sick of them treating you like that when you’d been a part of the avengers for almost 2 years. You jumped slightly when you heard a knock at your door. You thought it was Sam coming to talk to you, but you didn’t want to speak to him.

“Go away, Sam,” You yelled. 

“It’s Loki,” You heard his voice from the other side of the door. Your eyes widened in surprise and jumped up off the bed. Walking to open the door. You tried to make it look like you weren’t crying, but when you opened the door he could see the redness and puffiness around your eyes. 

“Is… something wrong?” You asked, having no idea why Loki would come talk to you of his own accord. 

“Can we talk?” He asked. You nodded and led him into your room. He looked around for a second, taking in your room before you sat on the bed and invited him to do the same. You sat more towards the middle of the bed, crossing your feet in towards you. Loki sat near the edge, barley making an indent in the covers. It was probably as awkward for him as it was for you. 

“Listen, I’m sorry if I’ve been annoying you the past few weeks. I’ve been trying to make you feel welcome here but I know it's been a lot. No one really wants a teenager all up in their business. So… I’m sorry,” You started, looking up at him.  

Now, you were usually good at reading people, however, ever since Loki moved into the compound, you could never read his face. Even now, you looked at his face and couldn’t see a single expression that revealed what he was thinking.

“I don’t understand you. Why are you so nice to me? And why would you go against your teammates to defend me? What exactly does that accomplish you?” You sigh a little as you realize he overheard you talking to the group of people out there.

“I don’t really have a reason to be nice besides wanting to make you feel welcome. I know what it’s like to feel… out of place.” You gesture to the wings on your back and the horns on your head. “Ever since this happened, the avengers are the only people that seem to accept me as the way I am. And I believe everyone deserves to have that. Even if the avengers don’t end up being that for you, I hope you do find it.” You explain. “I trust that you have good in you. Being mischievous doesn’t mean being evil,” You smile at him.

For the first time since Loki moved in with the avengers, he smiled. Even if it was a small smile, it was genuine. He nodded and got up, on his way to leave. Before he did leave though, he turned around and revealed he was never truly annoyed by you and enjoyed the talks you had. 

[hangekitty]

Tea for 3

Erwin x Levi x gn!Reader Headcanons

Scenario: the three of you decide to open up a tea shop together

Warnings: none!

Genre: fluff! Polyamory

Universe: Modern AU!

A/N: it’s a little short, but it’s definitely sweet. These headcanons have been on my mind a LOT and I just had to write them down. I feel like I mostly write polyamory stuff (even my private work is like 70% polyamory) but I am working on monogamous relationship stories as we speak! Should I keep writing polyamory? 🤔

First of all, it was Levi’s idea to open up a tea shop, even if he doesn’t want to admit it. He had first brought it up out of curiosity to see what you or Erwin thought. It wasn’t brought up again till Erwin found a little shop that was up for sale, to which Levi pretended not to be excited; in truth, if Levi was better at expressing himself he would have been jumping up and down with pure happiness.

Levi will probably need some convincing to actually go for this opportunity. I can see him being a little insecure as to whether he deserves such a chance at this; so hearing the two of you, the people he loves most, give him so much affection and encouragement he couldn’t refuse.

You three spend long nights together designing the interior and exterior of the tea shop; going for a sleek botanical look with a hint of rustic charm.

You were the creative of the three, designing the logo and even the menu; Erwin would be like 😧 being super impressed with your talents. He is very good with his hands in the DIY department, but can barely draw a stick figure!

You decide to call the tea shop Ackerman & Co. (as much as Levi tried to argue against it, it is of course his dream and thought it would be a lovely gesture of yours and Erwin’s love towards him). Needless to say, Levi loved your reasoning and eventually accepted it.

The three of you visiting the store before buying it, Erwin ever so vigilant with his questions. From “Is there a persistent mould problem” to “are the neighbours noisy?”

Luckily it seems things are perfect, the store is located just off the high streets but close enough to attract some wandering customers. A little detail I would like to add is that the store is close to a cathedral and one of Levi’s favourite things to do (especially at night) is to open a window and listen out to the bell chimes.

“Is it big enough for your bed?” The answer to that is yes! As you insisted that the three of you share a King size bed (although Levi doesn’t sleep that often as it is, he still enjoys the company) you worry that the living space may not be enough. Don’t worry, Erwin sized out the place; he measured the entire flat above the shop out with only a measuring tape.

You ask Miche, Hange and Moblit for help when it comes to building up the tea shop! From painting to decorating, Hange goes a little overboard with the plants, but it only adds to the charm. “Who the hell is going to water all of these?” Levi groaned, “don’t worry love, I will” you reassure him, he will of course make you keep a diary so you can keep an eye out and record watering times!

Erwin insists on adding a bookshelf into the shop; this means that customers can read whilst they are there, even setting up a weekly book club! You also suggest keeping a spot out for a book exchange, keeping an on-going flow of new content for the regular customers.

Before you officially open the shop, Kutchel (Levi’s mum) visits with a gift; it is a large kettle decorated with a giant green bow to ‘baptise’ the place (also came with a bouquet of flowers because she is a sweetheart). “I am so proud of you baby”

Levi won’t cry, but he’ll cry

Let me just say, Kutchel adores the two of you and is so proud and glad that Levi has people in his life who adore him as much as his mother does (although initially explaining polyamory to her was a challenge, she just didn’t understand at first! But she supports and loves you once she grasped the concept!)

The first day of opening was BUSY. Little did you three know, but Hange had invited EVERYONE they knew and even going up to people in the streets to come to the opening.

The most confident was Erwin, he was the main spokesperson in announcing your new place. Levi barely spoke, mostly to contain himself from just crying out of happiness. So to keep his strength, he will hold onto your hand all night, giving it tender squeezes if he started to feel overwhelmed.

Levi would be the manager, mainly working on the teas and coffee orders, Erwin is most definitely the baker, making muffins and cookies and all sorts! You were the waiter/waitress but you also had your hand in baking and/or tea making when it was needed!

You put up a message board in the main room so that customers and/or friends and family can leave post-it-notes on the board. Most of the notes you get are compliments of the establishment, but you will get the occasional “I love Erwin/Levi/Y/N” notes from your loved ones; those notes you keep up forever. - if ever you get any missing cat posters, Levi will make it his mission to look for said cat.

Levi insists on getting WIFI, but Erwin annoyingly will point out the large bookcase, stating that books are enough. He does eventually give in, but will purposefully set the password annoyingly long and complicated for the sake of being petty. The password would look something like L1v1nYNrmYl0vr$

You notice that Levi spends more time in bed with you three! He has definitely settled down a lot more, feeling so much joy that his dream came to light. You and Erwin of course enjoy the extra person to cuddle in bed.

Frequent visits from your friends, Hange will bring their laptop into the cafe to finish their thesis or other scientific reports; they would quite literally spend all day there and will sleep on the sofa if they could get away with it. - you do at least have a spare bedroom so if Hange stays too late, they have a place to sleep.

Levi putting out cat food for the local strays, a cute little quirk you only started noticing when a dozen cats were lined up outside the back entrance of the store.

The tea shop will of course be successful, so Levi decides to experiment and start his own line of teas. Starting off with the basic breakfast and earl greys and then into the fruity and herbal teas. Once he got his customers approval and satisfaction, he then sells the tea bags (and loose tea leaves) to customers to take home. He calls his tea ‘Teas of Freedom’ (like wings of freedom lmao) which become very popular.

GLASS TEAPOTS; you get to see the water change into beautiful colours once the teas infuse. The most popular being the jasmine tea where the flower blooms when the hot water is applied; Erwin’s face lights up EVERY TIME Levi prepares this kind of tea.

Can you imagine Levi’s face when someone comes in and asks for a Starbuck’s like order, he would be like “HUH???” But don’t worry, you step in and take the order effortlessly; Levi is a tea man, coffee is somewhat a foreign concept to him.

On quiet days, Erwin will come up behind you and wrap his arms around your waist, whispering sweet nothing into your ear and rocks you side to side. This man is so in love with you. He does this to Levi but not as often...mostly because even on not so busy days Levi is busy.

Imagine catching quick little kisses whilst its busy, hugging is one thing but a quick kiss on the cheek is honestly so cute; Levi would 100% get distracted and a lot more clumsy if you plant a forehead kiss on him whilst he’s preparing tea.

EEEEP I hope you enjoyed it!! I love EURI as it is, but being a x reader it meant I got an excuse to write them!

[willwriteforhugs]

how stray kids asks you out <3

skz scenario - all members (individually) x reader

genre: fluff, dating au, angst if you close your left eye

word count: 1.6k (total)

warnings: some cursing, but nothing else :)

a/n: hello, lovelies!! this is my very first (posted) stray kids fic- i hope you all enjoy. it’s nothing major, but i really had fun writing it. if you’ve found me on the explore page, hello! i’m a hot mess. pls validate me by reading what i write.

just kidding.

maybe.

ANYWAYS- please keep in mind that this is written in a totally lighthearted way, and this is 100% fictitious. this is for entertainment purposes only. thank you for reading!

chan: 

he is actually so shy about it :’(

but he knows he’s gonna go through with it

cause that’s the kind of person he is

he just wants his emotions to be out in the open

whether the feeling is mutual or not

so he just improvises 

he approaches you with completely no context? like he just walks up and starts a convo but you can’t tell why

you think he’s just. being chan

but no

he’s pretty chill, actually

his face is so tho red but he doesn’t know that so don’t say anything

a few minutes in he kinda just snaps because he just couldn’t wait

“y/n-ah, do you wanna- i don’t know, get together sometime? are you free?”

this takes you off guard completely

he misunderstands your reaction *screams*

and he immediately regrets saying anything

but you scramble to reassure him 

when you say you’d like to get together, he loses all humility

becomes a total flirt

this flusters you but the two of you have such CHEMISTRY 

“so it’s a date?”

“it’s a date.”

minho:

is the type to completely deny his own feelings until the very last minute

plus, tbh

he probably thinks you hate him

so he has a hard time convincing himself to finally ask you out

but when he does...

he just bites the bullet (lmao pray for him)

walks RIGHT THE FUCK UP TO YOU

“y/n.”

when you respond he just kinda:

“will you go out with me?”

you also probably thinks he hates you too (go communication!!)

so you’re just like *surprised pikachu face*

but he just stands there and waits for your response

he’s sweating on the DL

but you kinda just go with it and say yes

he’s hella surprised but doesn’t wanna show his excitement

so he just smirks and is like

“okay. what would you like to do, and when?”

(just because he’s a cocky lil shit doesn’t mean he’s not a gentleman)

but he’s also secretly planning the whole first date in his head

will i hold y/n’s hand? what will they wanna do? should i-

- minho’s brain

(aw)

changbin:

is on the bolder side

(be careful with this one)

(he’s feisty)

he probably let his feelings fester for a long time

so this is overdue

but he spends the whole day shamelessly flirting with you

he finally just asks if you want to grab some food

you don’t even really realize it’s a date until he insists on paying for everything

this makes you all clumsy and embarrassed

but he thinks it’s the cutest shit ever

well now he’s clumsy and embarrassed (sobs)

TECHNICALLY he doesn’t officially ask you out until after this

he pretty much just straight up confesses

the audacity i can’t

“y/n-ah... i really like you- will you let me take you out? on a real date?”

* gesturing to the take out *

he isn’t embarrassed at all

you CANNOT stop looking at his eyes

they’re so genuine and loving that you almost forget to answer

once he gets confirmation he promises to both plan and pay for the whole thing, even as you protest

how are you already in love with this man 

hyunjin:

poor hyunjinnie probably spent the last four months trying to decide how to ask you out

he’s been head over heels for you for a while now

and he knows he needs to make his move

(cause, let’s be honest- you’re a catch, and he’s protective. could i make it any more obvious?)

he ends up thinking that just being straightforward is the way to do it

so he spends the whole day just trying to get you alone

this is harder than he anticipated

so finally he just grabs you while you’re in conversation

and goes

“y/n, i’m sorry-it’s important, can i just talk to you a sec?”

you go with him, if not out of pure curiosity 

literally the SECOND you’re alone he just swivels around says

“did you know that you are really hard to catch alone?”

and you’re kinda just like: 

huh

but he continues

“anyways, i just had a question for you?”

“oh, okay. what is it?”

this is when the nerves hit him 

“oh, uh- i guess i was just wondering- if you would go out with me sometime? nothing big, i just-”

you interrupt him without thinking

“yes.”

* cue one completely flustered and w h i p p e d hyunjin *

jisung:

is not shy at ALL

but he wants to make sure you’re comfortable

so he doesn’t make a big deal out of it

he spent a lot of time debating how to do it

but he decides to write a note (so cute)

he waits until you leave the room for a sec

he slips a note into your bag that just says

“date? -jisungie”

with a lil heart next to it

then he panics and just books it

when you find it a bit later you’re initially confused

but then it kinda hits you

you FREAK out and track him down-

only to realize you have no idea what you want to say to him

but he knows you too well

and he just laughs when he sees your face

this makes you laugh too, even though you’re nervous

when the two of you finally recover he’s just

“but really- please? let me take you out.”

you know your face is on fire

so you just nod

but that’s all the confirmation he needs

felix:

king of overthinking 

we all know felix has EVERYTHING planned in his head

like, to a T

he’s been very stressed about asking you out, but he also doesn’t want to miss his chance

so he just thinks and thinks and thinks

he just wants it to be perfect for you

he decides to just hang out in the comfort of your home to do it

the two of you are just chilling (y’know. FRIEND THINGS.)

but he is completely in his own head

and you can tell

you get to be a little worried for him, so you just ask:

“hey- are you alright? you seem a little off tonight.”

he turns super pink and tries to play it off

but since you’re a stubborn piece of work, you pry a lil

and he cracks under pressure (I FEEL BAD OMG)

he finally just looks up and snaps:

“y/n- i’m really sorry. i wanted to to this well, and make it cute and romantic and have you fall in love with me in an instant. but you- god, you’re so nerve-wracking!”

you just sit there

completely flabbergasted

he bursts into awkward laughter, and between coughs he’s just like

“y/n, i was gonna ask you out. i’ve loved you for a while now.”

he continues: “but i guess i fucked up, didn’t i...”

you jump and interrupt him

and insist that he was being crazy- what was he doing letting his mind run free with that?

finally, to shut him up, you just lean over and place your lips over his.

seungmin:

is surprisingly confident

but also low-key has no idea what he’s doing

he decides to send you a text

he asks if you want to grab coffee, which you absolutely do

he doesn’t realize until later...

that he didn’t actually specify it was supposed to be a date.

oops.

but he kinda just goes with it, and the two of you maintain good conversation

finally he interrupts you mid-sentence and is like

“y/n, will you answer a question for me?”

you nod, and he continues:

“what is- uh- this- exactly? to you?”

* nodding down at your long empty coffee cups *

you don’t really understand the question (valid)

he kinda just sighs and starts laughing

“well. it was supposed to be a date. i’m just really bad at this.”

you just. cannot believe your ears

he just laughs harder and says

“so. can we try again?”

you start laughing too

and you know that even if it wasn’t the best first date,

you’d felt right at home. 

jeongin:

poor baby is SO NERVOUS 

he’s spent like,,,,

the last 6 days trying to plan how to finally do this 

but he decides to approach you and let it try to come up naturally

you two carry a conversation for a few minutes and then he asks

“so...do you- you know- like anyone?”

your face turns bright red

you can’t stop thinking

does he know oh my god am i that obvious i-

but you end up just looking away and being like

“i mean- i guess?”

he can’t decide how to respond

because on one hand- that person could be him

but on the other hand, it’s more likely that it’s not, and then it would be awkward as hell for him to ask you out

he kinda panics

then against his own will he just goes for it

“y/n-ah. i don’t really know how to say this- but will you let me take you out? i really like you...”

his ears are RED OH BOY

his voice kinda just trails off and you can tell he feels insecure

but when you tell him yes...

he was literally born for this

he gets so excited and doesn’t hide it at all

thank you so much for reading!! p.s. my asks are now open, feel free to send in your requests !

[just-a-fangirl13]

Thoughts & Theories about MacGyver 5x10 [MacRiley]

HOLY SHIT! 

This episode was absolutely INSANE. Im writing out my thoughts once and for all because I need to stop thinking about everything that happened (I highly doubt I will be able to but here's to trying)

SPOILERS FOR 5x10 OFCOURSE

Straight off the bat, I was screaming *internally* and yelling at Mac when he showed the diamond to Bozer. I suspected it yesterday when we got the snippet of Murdoc saying the words DIAMOND and RING with extra emphasis..(everyone on twitter said I was jumping to conclusions.. I thought so too honestly) But damn I did NOT expect them to actually do that!

Now here's why I am not mad about it anymore. [this is my interpretation you are free to disagree]

Firstly, when Mac told Bozer he was going to propose he didnt say I’m doing it because I love Desi or I want to spend the rest of our lives together or because she’s the one (doesn't mean he doesnt care for her ofcourse)

He said “Ever since I lost my dad & Jack, I have been thinking about the bigger picture and a commitment to make things work is exactly what Desi and I need right now. A grand romantic gesture.” He wanted to propose for stability so he could finally be on the same page with her. They never really defined their relationship before and this was a way for Mac to final bring it together. A grand romantic gesture is usually something people use to win their partners back which is what Mac was trying to do I guess. It almost sounds like he has to do it so he doesn't lose her again 

(ill get to my second reason in the end)

Then ofcourse Bozer tells Riley about it so she can be prepared. Bozer is such a good friend. He is supportive of Mac AND wants to protect Riley. I love him for it! He really is doing everything to be the best friend he can to both of them. (Leannas death was so painful and I just want to hug him but thankfully Riley had that covered.)

Next we get the BIG REVEAL. The moment all of us had been waiting for. 

The moment that SHOOK Angus MacGyver and CHANGED EVERYTHING!

Rileys Feelings!

“You want me to say it out loud? Fine. Yes I had feelings for Mac. There I said it. and yeah watching him and Desi together was breaking my heart so I moved out of his house. I should have said something to him a long time ago but I didn’t and now its over. ”

I had the opposite of a HEART ATTACK! (my heart rate was through THE ROOF!)

I have to say they really really outdid themselves on this reveal. 

SIDE NOTE: If anyone comes for Riley and tries to call her a slut or a home wrecker? You will have me to deal with. Even after Murdoc played the clip of her confession she still tried to deny it and brush it off so it wouldn't complicate things for Mac and Desi. If Riley had wanted, she could have easily told Mac this to his face while he was dating Desi and then let things happen from there but she DIDNT. She kept that secret buried so deep she herself was in denial.

(also if anyone calls Mac a player or anything like that.. I will end you. He is doing his best to deal with everything that has happened to him and people keep giving him shit for it....)

Anyways, we see Mac’s expression & he is just confused and shocked and clearly not trying to think about it because it changed EVERYTHING for him. 

[Murdoc saying I THINK IM ON TEAM RILEY was a HUGE HIGHLIGHT for me! I love him so damn much!]

Desi took it really well too actually. If they keep going down this road of growth and maturity for her I think I could actually like her again. (Russ too when he apologised to Bozer) 

She didnt throw a hissy fit or say I knew it or look at Riley like she was the villain. She focused on the mission & I respect her for that.

(Riley does say, “the next thing you are going to hear on that recording-” and then gets cut off by Desi.. If this will come into play at some point later on or if it was just her trying to explain herself, remains to be seen.)

Then after the climax, we finally hear Riley say the words to Mac in real time and we get our FIRST MacRiley hug of the season! 

At this point I thought they would agree to be friends and make the friendzone thing clear BUT NOPE. (you have no idea how happy I am about it not going down like that!)

I was also a puddle on the floor. SO

“Mac look-”

“You don’t have to say anything if you dont want to. Really.”

“I want to. Last year in Germany. I realised I was starting to have feelings for you. Real feelings. I didnt want to make anything weird between you and Desi. I didnt want to mess up our work or our friendship so I decided to bury it. Until the feelings passed.”

“Emotions aren’t a science. You can’t control them.”

Gosh they are so perfect together! The way they look at each other and the HUG! OH MY GOD THE HUG! Its just perfection.

Now we also see this from Desi’s POV. Again no anger or jealousy from her. I think it was an understanding. She realised that she and Mac were never going to work.. maybe a little pain but honestly everything that went down with her and Mac was her fault too. The lack of trust and understanding was always a problem for them. Sure, things were going well but she didnt seem like she was ready for a commitment if im being honest. If Mac had proposed I think Desi would have said no.(again nothing wrong with that) 

She didnt want to label their relationship..they haven't said the words I love you to each other and I dont think they even live together. It really was way too sudden.(these are just things im assuming people define how well a relationship is going by.. I have no experience.)

Then ofcourse we have what im calling the goodbye scene. Its the break up before the break up in my opinion.

Desi tells Mac that they should pretend the last 24 hours never happened (that might actually include Mac wanting to propose but make of it what you will..) and that they should have a clean slate. But its very clear from Mac’s face and Desi sees it too that he isnt 100% onboard with it. He cant forget about it.

Which is when Desi says “Look Mac just do whatever you feel is right” and Mac looks confused.

She then gives him a goodbye kiss. 

Look if you have ever watched any show/movie before where the characters are saying goodbye to each other or breaking each others hearts...THERE IS ALWAYS A KISS ON THE CHEEK. A final farewell of sorts. 

That is what it seemed like to me. It was Desi telling Mac to do what he has to. Even if it inevitably leads to their break up.

Again real emotional maturity from Desi here!

Then we get the scene, Monica Macer (the show runner) tweeted about back in December.

Mac knocking on someones door. If im being honest? I thought it was Desi’s place and he was going to propose...

BUT it turned out to be Riley’s.

Mac clearly hasn't stopped thinking about what happened. I wouldnt either if my best friend who has put her life on the line for me and trusts me 100%, now has feelings for me? That would turn my world upside down too.

especially if I had feelings for her that I buried so deep that I never acknowledged them.

Also this is my scenario for how their first kiss goes down just FYI.. (Mac showing up at Rileys doorstep and finally confessing his feelings and kissing her *probably won't happen that way now though, but I still love it*)

Mac hesitates for a second before finally knocking on her door.

“Mac? Everything okay?”

“I can’t pretend like the last 24 hours didnt just happen. They did. So I gotta ask. Did it work?”

“Did what work?”

“Hiding your emotions and letting it pass. Did they go away?”

and I proceeded to pass out. My brain just checked out...

Now initially in all my freaking out I thought Mac was asking Riley about his feelings. If HE buried them deep enough would he still be able to move on with Desi but then I rewatched it and I realised he was asking RILEY if her feelings were still there, if there was still a possibility of something ever happening. 

She never told him its all good now! my feelings are gone and it was a long time ago. She told him she buried it but he needed to know if a future with Riley was something tangible. 

BASICALLY ANGUS MACGYVER ASKED RILEY DAVIS IF SHE WAS STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM. *I think I need to go to a hospital now*

So this was my second reason for not being annoyed about the proposal. The writers used it to show what a huge impact it would have on Mac. How much Rileys feelings would actually mean to him. the GAME CHANGER it would be.

A friend of mine said it was kinda funny and a little jarring but I liked it. (I could have done without the proposal) But I understand why they did it. They couldnt have Mac and Desi break up the same day Riley’s feelings came out because then people would hate Mac. They had to make him want to take the next step with Desi but then drop a bomb on him, that would make him question everything.

Again this is what I took away from it.

BUT GOSH WAS THIS EPISODE AMAZING!

I do get that some people are not happy with this and some said it was too sudden *not like we’ve been waiting since season 1 or anything* but I think after 5x11 things will slow down again. Mac may break up with Desi only at the end of the season when he finally comes to terms with his feelings. (Some people are still cautious and I get it but after everything that just happened I find it hard to believe that Mac and Riley won't end up together after all.. not to mention the leaked script conversation between Mac and Riley from 5x15)

Now I dont know how the final scene ends.. they definitely dont get called away for their solo mission immediately after because Mac’s cheek injury is relatively healed in this stills, which means Riley does answer Mac’s question. She may try to avoid it or deflect but he is standing right there so...who knows.

Next weeks episode is a MacRIley solo mission and lets just say things definitely are heating up a bit..*wink wink*

YUP IM HYPED. 

BRING ON THE SEXUAL TENSION AND THE ANGST!

[4ragon]

oh can we please hear the magatama essay??

Oh boy oh boy, let’s go

Ahem

How to Lie to the Magatama

An essay by JJsADragon

Unlocking Psyche-Locks with the Magatama is a really fun mechanic throughout the Ace Attorney series. It’s introduced in Justice for All when Pearl charges the Magatama Maya gifts to Phoenix with spiritual energy. She describes it thusly: “This is the power of the Magatama. Only you can see these "Psyche-Locks", Mr. Nick… The more someone wants to hide their secret, the more locks you will see. If it's only one, I think you can easily unlock it.” 

Basically: If someone has a secret they don’t want to share, you have to present in-game evidence and break the locks. Things get a little more complicated with the introduction of Black Psyche-Locks, but the general gist of it stays the same. Someone has a secret they don’t want to tell you, and you can unlock that secret with evidence.

This, I believe, is fundamentally wrong.

Why do I think that? Well, I always really like picking apart these mechanics, both as in-game mechanics and how they would work in the real world. In particular, I think the most interesting way to see how something works is to figure out its shortcomings. What does and doesn’t set off Apollo’s bracelet? Why doesn’t Athena notice The Phantom’s whole deal? And, more to the point, when does the Magatama straight up get things wrong?

There are several moments I want to focus on. We have seen the Magatama fail several times throughout the series. Or, to clarify, we have seen at least one time when locks should have appeared where they did not, and several times where the chains did appear and the answers uncovered were either incomplete or just straight-up incorrect.

So, let’s find out how and why the Magatama fails us. First up: 

The False Negative: Farewell, My Turnabout

Fortunately, I think this one is the easiest one to understand. The Magatama has one very clear false negative in Justice for All: Farewell, My Turnabout. Phoenix asks Matt Engarde if he murdered Juan Corrida, and he replies, “Just so we're clear, dude, I didn't kill anyone, and that includes Juan Corrida, OK?” And he’s correct. He didn’t kill anyone. He did not actively commit any murders. And on that technicality, the Magatama does not go off. He did not kill anyone, and he knows it. He believes it. He feels no residual guilt over it. His hands are clean. Hell, he seems kind of gleeful about the fact that he was ‘technically right’ when the truth comes out later.

So, why didn’t a Psyche-Lock appear? As I said, it was a technicality. He wasn’t trying to hide it from Phoenix, he just truly felt no responsibility for what happened. He felt no guilt about it. The Psyche-Locks don’t appear until Matt’s secrets come up. 

This, of course, lines up neatly with our understanding of the Magatama. This instance very clearly falls within what we know about Psyche-Locks. If you’re not trying to hide it, if you truly believe what you’re saying, it’s not a secret the Magatama will alert you to. So, what about these other instances? Do these line up as neatly in the rules of the Psyche-Locks?

The Half Truth: The Cosmic Turnabout

This one is a little strange so I’m just going to touch on this.

In day one of your investigations for The Cosmic Turnabout, you run into a conflicted Bobby Fulbright. When pressed, two Psyche-Locks appear, and unlocking them leads you to three conversations: 1) The bomb threat before the launch, 2) Why Simon Blackquill was given permission to prosecute, and 3) The mysterious Phantom.

So why do I call this a false positive? After all, he is technically hiding all these things. And yet, a lot of how this Psyche-Unlocking goes down doesn’t really make as much sense when you consider that Bobby Fulbright is The Phantom. It really doesn’t make much sense how much information he’s feeding them about the situation, unlocked Psyche-Locks or not. Especially the way he goes about the whole thing. 

We know in hindsight that The Phantom doesn’t actually care about Simon Blackquill or solving the crime that he committed. Every display of emotion is an act. So why does he make a big show of feeling conflicted? Why does the bomb threat that he made lead him to divulging all of these worries about Simon going after the Phantom? Was him revealing this information part of his game? Since we know he was trying to cover his tracks, was he feeding us half truths for a reason? Did he want to feed us this information?

If that’s the case, that leads us to a new problem. Since the question asked was “Why Are You Being Cooperative”, why wouldn’t the fact that he was the Phantom ping the Magatama? He was being cooperative so that he could feed you information, not because he cared about any of the things he was ‘troubled’ by. So why does the Magatama only pick up on half the truth? After all, the Phantom wasn’t knowingly tricking the Magatama.

(Also if you haven’t read this comic I thought it was a super interesting theory. Not sure I ascribe to it 100% but it was a really interesting take.)

I think it’s important to note in this example that, no matter how you interpret The Phantom’s actions, all signs point to him wanting to divulge this information for one reason or another. There was an intent about it. He may not have known a thing about the Psyche-Locks, but he very clearly was baiting the protagonists with an intent. And technically, without knowing it, he was also baiting the Magatama. 

This means that, in the end, the information he actually revealed to the protagonists was not a closely guarded secret of the heart. Yes, you still needed to present evidence and draw it out of him, but I think The Phantom wanted the characters to draw it out of him. It’s not a secret that a bumbling detective was having trouble hiding, it was information that a spy wanted planted. There was intent here, no matter how you look at it. And that leads us to our third example.

The False Positive: The Stolen Turnabout

Unlike the previous two cases, this is the first time that someone has straight up lied to the Magatama. Trials and Tribulations: The Stolen Turnabout. I always get so mixed up by this case. It took me three playthroughs to finally get the hang of who was doing what where and when. And do you know why that was? It was because of one lie that Luke Atmey told us early in the investigation.

Phoenix: Detective Atmey... You were knocked unconscious by the thief, weren't you!?

Atmey: Ha ha ha! Surely you must be joking... You think that I, Luke Atmey, could be knocked unconscious so easily!?

Phoenix: This sword proves it!

Atmey: ...! Th-That's...

Phoenix: Before the theft, this sword was in the hand of the statue of Ami Fey. Furthermore... at that time, it was not bent.

Atmey: Aaah... Err...

Phoenix: ...There's only one explanation. You were struck on the head and knocked unconscious by this sword! Well, Detective!? What about it!?

Atmey: ...I'm impressed. You truly are an "Ace Attorney"...

Unlock Successful

Unlike every other instance, this is just a straight-up lie. This is not a technicality, like with Matt Engarde. This is not pieces of the truth, like The Phantom. This is just factually incorrect. Luke Atmey was not knocked unconscious by Mask☆Demasque. In fact, this not only is a lie, it’s a calculated lie. Without knowing about the Magatama or its capabilities, Luke Atmey used it to convince us that he was knocked unconscious by Mask☆Demasque at the scene of the crime to disguise the fact that he was Mask☆Demasque, which is even wilder when you realize later that even that was a lie! He was covering up a lie with another lie with another lie. It was not just a ploy to fool you into thinking he was attacked my Mask☆Demasque, it was also a part of him convincing you that he was Mask☆Demasque when he wasn’t.

So why the FUCK does the Magatama go off?!

There’s of course a meta answer. The writers weren’t thinking that hard about it. They just wanted to use the Psyche-Locks to make the story more interesting. But that’s boring. I want to go deeper.

Luke Atmey, like The Phantom later on, wanted information planted. But he couldn’t simply tell everyone he was attacked by Mask☆Demasque. After all, he knew admitting to it would put his credentials under scrutiny. So he needed someone to organically draw it out of him. Again, he wanted this information out there. Otherwise, him agreeing to Phoenix’s conclusions, hell, him setting up this scenario with the Shichishito wouldn’t make any sense. Plus, it was only behind one Psyche-Lock and led to him revealing a photo of the crime, one that he was very meticulous about taking to create an alibi.

So. What does this all mean? How are people confusing the Magatama? How are people lying? I think that the element that Pearl got wrong in her initial explanation is that the Magatama reacts to secrets that, deep down, a person wants to divulge. After all, with enough evidence, you can eventually draw all sorts of information out of a person. Some are certainly more closely guarded secrets than others, but in the end, I think the Magatama reacts to secrets that a character wants to share but is not willing to do so without that prompting. It doesn’t have to be real, it just has to be something the person is keeping secret with the intent of finding a way to plant the information.

This can even apply to Black Psyche-Locks. Unconscious secrets that are hidden even from the person hiding them? Those are deep hurts that I think drive a lot about these characters’ personalities and motivations, and I think things like that are the kinds of stuff that a character wants to confront but is unable to do so out of fear, so they push it from their minds.

Let’s look at a few more examples. In Bridge to the Turnabout, Miles demands info from Larry, and he’s able to completely circumvent the Psyche-Locks by divulging something completely irrelevant about his crush on Iris. When Miles realizes his mistake, he discovers a completely new set of Psyche-Locks. Or when Phoenix confronts “Iris” about the presence of another Iris at the crime, “Iris” (cough Dahlia cough) uses that to start planting these ideas about Iris as the original betrayer, as the one who had wronged Dahlia in the first place. I feel these are both things that the characters did want to share, despite not wanting to do it unprompted.

Anyway, uh, that’s most of what I got. Perhaps there’s a stronger answer out there for why the Magatama may react in places it shouldn’t. Maybe there’s some other hidden rule they haven’t mentioned. Or maybe it is just as simple as “The writers didn’t think that hard about it.” But hey, I think I like this interpretation better.

[dying-suffering-french-stalkers]

For the ship game: prime numbers for Lupin x Jigen!

HERE YOU GO GHOST, THIS WAS FIVE PAGES IN A GOOGLE DOC AND TOOK ME SEVERAL HOURS

Under a cut, allegedly, though mobile has been known to just IGNORE THAT. Sorry in advance if this gets goofed for anyone.

2) Who is always horny and will have sex at any time, in any place?

Lupin, obviously (and canonically). Just the horniest man you ever did see. Jigen knows what he wants and when he wants it, but he has difficulty keeping up with Don Juan Triumphant over there. Lupin is also far less picky about locations and times than Jigen is. Jigen still has a FEW standards, thank you, and also a stronger sense of self-preservation. Lupin sometimes tries to start shit in public or during a heist and Jigen is like “I REALLY, REALLY APPRECIATE THE SENTIMENT BUT CAN WE NOT.” The closest to public anything Jigen will put up with is bar bathroom/back-alley hookups, and he doesn’t really tend to do that with Lupin or Goemon since they have secondary locations far more suited to such activity (or at least the damn Fiat, if nothing else). That said, Jigen is a spiteful bastard and gets a huge kick out of riling Lupin up over the walkie-talkie during jobs. He is more than happy to get jumped by his boss after they make it out and secure the loot.

3) Who is more into taking showers/baths together? Who tries to make it relaxing and who tries to make it sexy time?

Honestly, while I can totally see Lupin and Jigen doing this with their other partners, I have a harder time imagining the two of them doing this together and I’m not sure why. I feel like these two on their own both like the privacy bathing gives them, whether it’s to clean wounds or decompress from a job.

On the occasions when they do bathe together, I feel like it’s an unspoken kind of thing, where the other person quietly slips in the tub/shower with them and they just don’t bother protesting. I think Lupin is more likely to join Jigen in his bathing, but if Jigen is sleepy enough or lonely enough he might do the same. There is a lot of mutual appreciation of scars. They’ve definitely smoked in the tub before (Intricate Rituals™). Lupin is probably more likely to get handsy, because Lupin, but two can play that game if Jigen is feeling it, and also Jigen gives Lupin a run for his money in the staring department. No hat to hide behind now.

Lupin has also 100% done the whole “Hey Jigen, do you know if—stop screaming, it’s me—do you know if we have any more instant dashi? Goemon’s gonna slice up the sofa if I ruin soba night again.”

5) Who sleeps on the couch when they get into a fight?

Jigen, but to be fair, he canonically sleeps on the couch most nights (possibly to keep an eye on the door, possibly because he knows that place, at least, is always “acceptable” for him to occupy). It’s an odd night if you don’t see Jigen out there with a glass and a bottle of scotch and an old movie on TV. The main difference is that if he and Lupin have been fighting, he won’t bother with the formality of a glass and the TV will be playing far louder or not at all.

7) [A] Who said “I love you” first? And [B] who ends their arguments in a fight with “Because I love you”?

I hate to take the coward’s way out here, but I think the answers are A) either one - depends on the headcanon/fic/version of the characters I’m feeling that day, and B) both.

For A, they’re both the sort of people to show their love—true love/affection, not just flirtation/infatuation, LUPIN—in action, not words. Lupin is a man of many words to a fault, generous with his verbal and physical affection, so Lupin has to find a way to make sure Jigen knows he means it and how he means it. He may rightly fear that Jigen won’t believe him (or else believe him but take it platonically) if he says “I love you” to his face, so first he’ll show him through every little action he can. Jigen is a man of few words to a fault, so saying personal stuff like that out loud is both a last resort and the point of no return. Getting him to say it at all, unambiguously, and while sober is like pulling teeth. Once one of them finally spits it out, though, I think the other is quick to reciprocate (again, if they manage to say it clearly and under good circumstances and not ambiguously/while drunk or wounded/etc. They’re both idiots and selective cowards so this is a big if). The mutual relief is palpable and immediately followed by sex, because they’re both (horny) idiots and selective cowards who do not want to talk about Emotions and Personal Things any more than strictly necessary.

For B, ohhhh man, if it isn’t that same emotional avoidance coming to bite them in the asses! Looks like talking about deep emotions is strictly necessary after all! You know it’s a Big Important Argument for them if this is what it comes to. This is going to tie in somewhat to the answers for 11, 17, and 23, so stay tuned. “Because I love you” coming from either of them should give the other pause, but if they are angry enough, they’re both quite likely to storm off after that declaration anyway. They’ll come back and have a real discussion later, but the shock or frustration of that arresting declaration dropped in the middle of an argument is something neither of them are great at dealing with. Hearing that from Jigen might be enough to stop Lupin in his tracks, but Lupin might also be so dead-set on something that he’ll steamroll right over it even if he knows he’ll regret it later. Hearing that from Lupin probably only makes Jigen angrier because of his awful self-esteem (see answers 11 and 23), and even if he’s been working on that, his instinct will be to snarl “Yeah, right” and storm out the door. I like to think that one day they are able to get to the heart of the argument sooner (because this is almost always it) and work on the behaviors that worry the other so much, but alas, they are a mess.

11) Who makes fun of the other for having a crush on them, and who has to remind them that they are in a relationship?

Once again, either of them depending on the day.

As you mentioned in your JiGoe post, Jigen says it partly because he thinks it’s funny (“You have a crush on me, Boss? Fuckin’ embarrassing”) but also because he’s fishing for validation. His self-esteem/confidence in anything outside his shooting skills is shit and he still can’t quite believe that Lupin isn’t lying/he hasn’t conned Lupin into something. This is rather overestimating his conning skills and underestimating his many good qualities, but, well, genuine, lasting affection is kinda new for him. Much to Jigen’s annoyance, Lupin figures out exactly what Jigen’s up to after the first few times and answers him seriously (and positively) instead of continuing the “joke”. Lupin loses patience for this particular tactic over time but I like to think that Jigen finally begins believing in the affection, too, so it comes up less and less and one day Jigen might actually play the quip straight without the self-deprecation. Ideally he would just take the damn compliment, but it’s LupJig and banter is one of their love languages.

When Lupin says it, he typically is playing the quip straight and fondly giving Jigen shit for showing an Emotion and motherFUCKER I just realized Jigen could probably be considered a tsundere. I hate this. ANYWAY. Jigen then immediately snarks back that yes, Lupin, considering we’ve been travelling the world together and actively fucking for X years, it’d be damn awkward if I didn’t by now.

13) Who initiates duets? and who is the better singer?

Lupin absolutely initiates duets, or rather, he tries to; whether or not Jigen actually chimes in is another matter entirely. Lupin is also the better singer by far (when he’s sober). He loves singing along to pop and rock in the car (“This is the reason God invented America!”).

Much as it would please me personally to give Jigen a smooth operatic baritone, there’s no way in hell he sounds good after smoking a pack a day for twenty-something years. I think Jigen can carry a tune and he’s a decent hummer and whistler, but his singing voice isn’t spectacular.

Lupin occasionally succeeds in getting Jigen to join him in car karaoke, though as in all things, Lupin is much louder and more impassioned. Jigen frequently hums along under his breath, though, and Lupin loves hearing Jigen’s a cappella renditions of classical music (complete with hand motions).

When Queen starts becoming popular, car singalongs become much more involved because it’s MY silly headcanon and You Are Not Immune To Queen. Jigen cried the first time he heard “Bohemian Rhapsody” and he will kill Lupin if he ever tells Goemon or, God forbid, Fujiko. When the four of them are in the car it’s a full-on Wayne’s World headbanging party. (Pops is the drunk guy they pick up along the way. Also, seeing Payless Shoe Source in this clip dealt me psychic damage.)

Lupin and Jigen (and Goemon) are the living embodiment of the drunk friends singing “Sweet Caroline” post, and Jigen is specifically this version of “Sweet Caroline”.

17) Who is more protective?

THAT IS THE QUESTION, HUH, GHOST? Jigen’s job and, to a certain degree, raison d’être is protecting Lupin, but (to cheat slightly and quote your own DM to me), if you think Lupin won’t raze everything to the ground to keep Jigen (and the others) safe, you don’t know him at all. They are this meme to the deepest of faults. They are both so desperately afraid of losing what they have (and in Lupin’s case, this is tinged with a bonus, even more concerning “what is his”) that they will go full self-sacrificing, scorched-earth policy. This is, in fact, my favorite reason for Lupin to do the worst thing he does: fake his own death to protect his partners. Lupin never stops to think that maybe, JUST MAYBE, he should trust his partners to fake grief and keep the secret long enough for whoever’s on their tail to give up or let their guard slip. Lupin is willing to hurt them in an effort to protect them, so in that way, I suppose Lupin is the “most” “protective”. Jigen’s self-abasement to the point of unhesitating and perhaps even hasty sacrifice is painful, too, but Jigen would never dare go to the same level of deception (except in Goodbye, Partner, apparently? But 1) I haven’t watched it yet and 2) while awful, I still feel like fake betrayal pales in comparison to very convincingly (AND MAYBE REPEATEDLY) faked death).

19) Who drives and who has the window seat?

They split driving duties, but Lupin genuinely loves driving and Jigen is more than happy to prop his feet on the Fiat’s dashboard and smoke or sleep the hours away.

23) Who thinks they are not good enough for the other’s love? and who’s more afraid of losing the other? Who thinks they keep messing up, only for the other to tell them they don’t need to worry?

HERE WE GO AGAIN!!! I think the answer to all of these is ultimately Jigen, but that’s not to say Lupin doesn’t share the exact same worries.

Jigen has a very difficult time believing that his partners’ love is genuine, and since Lupin is the one he knew first, that’s where it first manifests. Jigen has had very, very few good romantic connections in his life (if any). He doesn’t know what Lupin could possibly see in an older, prickly hired killer with a drinking problem and a head full of demons. He’s willing to believe that Lupin keeps him around for his skills, for protection, and for sex, sure, but anything past that? Doubtful. This ties into the other two parts of the question: Jigen is afraid that if he fails in his sharpshooting or his protection, he will be cut out of the gang, or worse, Lupin will end up dead because Jigen slipped up. As mentioned in question 17, Jigen cannot bear to lose Lupin and he would never forgive himself if he believed it was somehow his fault. Accordingly, Jigen takes “failure” that exceeds his usual margin of error very seriously in the early days. Later, he is better about this, but the worst-case scenario still stands.

Lupin, on the other hand, has had plenty of romantic connections, some good, some bad, though it is perhaps telling that Fujiko is his longest romantic relationship other than Jigen. He is afraid that if he doesn’t put on the world’s greatest show at all times, no one will give a rat’s ass about some scrawny grandson of an old French thief (or the perhaps unwanted/disliked son of a ruthless crime lord, because I love that fanon for Lupin the Second). He must live up to and indeed surpass the previous Lupins, he must shower his partners in money and adventure, he must always, always come out on top no matter how south the plan goes, or else what is the point of him? It takes time for him to turn his persona off for more than a few seconds, to let the quieter, sometimes contemplative side that slips through the cracks come to rest out in the open. Years down the road, Jigen finally gets up the courage and the words to tell Lupin that he would love him no matter what he did or where he went, even if that was nothing and nowhere. And again, see question 17 re: losing Jigen.

29) Who does some crazy stunt to try and impress the other and who ends up driving them to the emergency room after it backfires?

Lupin is by far the most guilty of this. He’s constantly pulling dumb shit, whether that be for World-Renowned Gentleman Thief reasons or just He May Be Stupid reasons. Case in point: the tunnel scene in The First, after which Jigen was duly impressed. Fortunately for Lupin, Lady Luck must be head over heels for him because the bastard keeps surviving, but sometimes even she can’t save him from medical consequences. Jigen bulk-ordered “Stupid Hurts” band-aids specifically for Lupin. Jigen’s bad choices are more likely to literally backfire on him, but Goemon more than makes up for Jigen’s slack in the Crazy Stunt department.

[obeyme-kaidii]

Lesson 45 Summary

MC continues to study sorcery with Solomon’s help, and begins the process of acquiring their “Sorcerer’s License.”

***SPOILERS BEYOND THIS POINT***

The day begins with MC helping the brothers learn their way around human world appliances and food. Asmo points out that it’s been a long time since he’s been in the human world, and that it’s progressed considerably since then. Beel agrees, stating that they make progress very quickly. Asmo wonders if it’s perhaps because they haven’t changed all that much themselves, so it only seems that way.

Lucifer reminds MC that they have a meeting with Solomon. MC is initially confused, but then Lucifer remembers that they had passed out because of Solomon’s food in Lesson 42, so they likely didn’t hear when Solomon was making those plans. He then explains that MC is meeting up with Solomon and he and Beel are coming along. The brothers, predictably, complain. But Belphie seems to have some idea as to why Lucifer and Beel were chosen, though he doesn’t explain further.

After breakfast, MC, Lucifer, and Beel meet up with Solomon in front of the Sorcerers’ Society Headquarters. The society is tasked with providing assistance to sorcerers living in the human realm. The way Solomon speaks about them, indicates that he doesn’t exactly have a lot of respect for the organization. (Some of this is explained later)

Solomon explains that to become an official sorcerer, the Society issues you a license. Much like learning to drive, you are first granted a provisional license before you are able to apply for your full license.

Lucifer attempts to ask Solomon why he and Beel are needed in order for MC to apply for their license, and Solomon deflects, saying it will all make sense once they are inside. Lucifer is of course suspicious of Solomon’s intentions, but nevertheless, follows him inside the building.

Once inside the building, the group is noticed by other sorcerers immediately who recognize both Beel and Lucifer as powerful, well known demons. It seems that some did not believe that Solomon’s apprentice had actually “tamed” the seven rulers of the Devildom. With Beel and Lucifer accompanying them, this proves that they had, and makes Solomon be taken more seriously.

Solomon goes on to explain he’s actually on bad terms with the Society (why is this not surprising?). This apparently has a negative effect on MC’s ability to be issued a license. And it turns out that Solomon actually founded the society back in ye olden days, with the help of his talented apprentice, and eventually left the Society after a difference of opinion.

He then tasks Lucifer and Beel with protecting MC, to make sure they aren’t harassed during their visit.

Without answering any further questions from the brothers, Solomon leads the way to the reception area where MC starts the registration process. The receptionist does not seem at all pleased to see Solomon, but he smiles and continues on like he doesn’t notice.

Solomon instructs MC to hold out their hand, and the receptionist presses their staff to the back of their hand, causing a seal to appear. The magical seal takes on the shape of 3 staves and 7 stars - the crest of the Sorcerers’ Society, Lucifer explains, having recognized the symbols.

The 3 staves are to represent the “Three Magi” who are responsible for “inventing the magical arts”. And the 7 stars represent the “seven virtues” - temperance, chastity, generosity, patience, diligence, gratitude, and humility.

(In other words, the opposites of the Sins the brothers represent - gluttony, lust, greed, wrath, sloth, envy, pride (in order))

Solomon then explains that in order to be granted a license, MC must complete seven trials, and will be awarded 1 star for each. According to tradition, Solomon will give MC their first trial as their master.

Solomon then casts a spell on Lucifer, temporarily restraining him. Lucifer and Beel are understandably angry, and MC has the option of yelling at Solomon for what he is doing. Lucifer is quick to shift into his demon form, as is Beel, but he stops Beel from intervening - insisting that a simple spell like that was not enough to stop him.

Not wanting to anger Lucifer further, he then explains that this is all part of the test for MC. Wanting to do what he can to help MC, Lucifer stops resisting and let’s Solomon continue. Solomon then casts the next part of his spell, and shrinks Lucifer down so that he can fit in the palm of MC’s hand (omg this sounds so cute 😭 someone draw this please).

Lucifer is completely embarrassed, and MC is able to ask Solomon to turn them back, but he refuses, explaining that it’s part of MC’s test. They are to “protect Lucifer for one full day” (24 hrs).

Beel thinks that will be easy, saying they just have to hide out at home. But Lucifer then points out that his brothers are in fact the ones most likely to cause trouble for him, so home is probably the last place he’ll be safe. Solomon goes on to explain that MC cannot command the brothers and restrain them. They instead must rely on Beel’s powers to keep Lucifer safe. Beel is also forbidden from acting on his own to protect Lucifer.

Solomon states he’s going to be staying with them to oversee the test, apparently amused by the situation which only annoys Lucifer more (angy mini Luci is an adorable mental image 😂).

The first place they head to is Simeon’s cafe. Both Simeon and Luke are shocked to see mini Lucifer, and find him absolutely adorable. Simeon teases Lucifer about how cute he is, poking his cheeks and making Lucifer blush. When Luke tries to poke his cheeks too, Lucifer still manages to intimidate him and scares Luke away. MC is then given the option of poking his cheeks or petting him, making Luke and Beel jealous that they can’t do the same.

Beel points out that even though Lucifer has only shrank, he actually smells like a human now. Luke is surprised to learn that Beel can tell the difference, and Beel explains that everyone smells different - even Luke, who he says smells like an angel. Simeon continues to tease Lucifer about his current condition and how it must be because he cares so much for MC. Lucifer ignores Simeon’s taunts, reminding the group they need a plan to keep him safe before they can go home.

Solomon explains that in order to harness Beel’s powers, they must first learn how to draw out his “true power”. He goes on to say that simply saying the same incantation that MC used in Season 1 to harness Asmo’s power won’t work - MC needs to understand Beel “true nature.” It’s decided that MC should spend as much time with Beel as possible (including sleeping with him, which makes mini Luci super jelly) in order to learn more about him and what makes Beel, Beel.

Lucifer states that he will be sleeping in the same room as Beel and MC, since he has to stay close so they can protect him. And Solomon chimes in that he’ll be sleeping with them too so that he can keep an eye on things. He gets excited about the idea of a “pajama party” with the group, and Luke and Simeon are obviously jealous that they can’t join them.

At home, Lucifer and Beel go over the plan once again, reminding MC to stay on their guard and to protect Lucifer. Solomon thinks they are being over dramatic, but Lucifer assured him that he’s underestimating what his brothers are capable of and the lengths they’d go through to harass him. Solomon asks why his brothers hate him so much, and Beel explains they don’t really hate him and MC is able to agree with him, encouraging and comforting Lucifer.

They finally head inside, and the first thing they hear is a voice chanting a spell. Soon, they all are falling through the darkness. Everyone then realized that they aren’t actually falling, that it’s just an illusion. When the illusion clears they find themselves in an odd building. Lucifer identifies the voice that he heard earlier as Satan’s and wonders if he perhaps created a world to trap them in. But Beel recognizes the location as a building from one of Levi’s video games. (And Lucifer immediately calls Levi a bastard for trapping him in another game. 😂)

Levi then makes a dramatic entrance, completely in character as the Lord of Shadow. Beel, Lucifer, and Solomon are not impressed with Levi’s performance, exasperated at being trapped in another video game.

Levi doesn’t let them discourage him for long though, quickly turning to MC to explain what it is they are doing there. MC must defeat the “Demon Lord Satan” in order to save the world (and thus win the game). Lucifer ignores Levi, demanding that Solomon returns them home immediately, but Solomon insists he is unable to do so since he doesn’t even know where they are right now (which I think is total bullshit, but I digress).

Beel then explains to Levi what the situation is - that MC has to protect Lucifer as part of their test, and that they can’t do anything that would put either of them in danger (and I’m assuming that Levi already knows this because he didn’t say a thing when he saw Lucifer). He then says that they absolutely cannot go find Satan, since that would be the worst possible thing to do with Lucifer.

But Levi is a step ahead, and already knew that they wouldn’t want to seek out Satan. He summons up a projection of sorts of Satan, allowing him to speak to the group. It appears that Diavolo snuck off to the human world for a surprise visit (without informing Barbatos, but come on, we all know the butler knew this was going to happen), and Satan has now taken him hostage as an incentive to get Lucifer to participate.

Staying in character, Levi gives MC some money (100 Grimm to be exact, which yes, shows up in your in game mailbox lol) so they can purchase some armor and supplies. (And please play along with Levi 🥺) Levi then gives MC a special “Lord of Shadow” talisman, wishing them luck on their journey. Lucifer, now thoroughly annoyed, reminds Levi that there will be consequences for doing this to them. And Levi, the super cute otaku that he is, explains he just wanted to play a new game with his brothers. 🥺

(NOTE - Based on an in game chat between Barbatos and Simeon, I believe it was Simeon that alerted Levi and his brothers of Lucifer’s...condition. Which is just another point in the “Simeon is an asshole” column.)

The group then heads into the nearby town to start their journey. The first thing they decide to look for is armor and weapons. MC is given the option of breaking nearby barrels (just like in an RPG), which Solomon finds extremely amusing, so he joins MC in smashing things before Lucifer yells at them to stop screwing around and find a weapons shop. 😂

After finally locating the weapons shop, they realize that Little D Number 2 is actually in charge. Solomon remarks that the equipment doesn’t look that great, but Beel is quick to point out that it’s the first town in the game, so that’s usually how it works (and I find it super cute that Beel probably has experience with RPG games like this because he plays with Levi 🥺❤️). When Beel tries to ask Number 2 if he sells food, he soon grows frustrated when he learns that, just like a video game character, Number 2 can only respond using certain phrases.

Solomon eventually is able to buy gear for himself and MC (and thank god his sprite is now wearing his sorcerer outfit and not his hideous human world outfit 😂), and Beel says the only thing that would have fit Lucifer was a small outfit for a fairy, which Lucifer absolutely refuses to wear. Beel was really hoping for armor for himself, so MC is given the option of attempting to haggle with Number 2. Number 2 then offers them a quest - seek out the Greedy monster that is hanging out at the local casino (whom everyone immediately recognizes as Mammon), cheating people out of their money, and get back the money he stole from Number 2. Then Number 2 will gladly give them a great discount on a full armor set for the Lord of Flies.

Everyone decides it’s best to head to an inn for now to get some food and rest, and that they’ll go look for Mammon the following morning. While eating dinner, Lucifer has trouble since he’s so tiny, and MC is able to offer to cut it up for him. He then takes it a step further and asks to be fed (guess you have to enjoy what you can when you’re forced to be pocket size? Lol), making Solomon and Beel jealous.

When they are done eating, they head up to their room and Solomon explains that they will need to share beds since Levi didn’t give them enough Grimm for a bigger room. Solomon and Lucifer will be in one bed, with Beel and MC in the other.

Sometime after laying down, Beel attempts to talk to Lucifer about Satan, but he doesn’t answer. MC then is able to talk to Beel and reassure him that Satan likes Lucifer, he just has trouble admitting it. Beel then tells MC the story of how he came to respect Lucifer -

As a young angel, Beel’s only gift was his strength, and he struggled to control his powers. Often making a mess of things, with Raphael giving him a hard time. One day, Lucifer comes to check on Beel and offers him some words of encouragement. He tells him that being a Celestial Realm soldier isn’t about attacking, but protecting. And that Beel’s powers mean he can protect everyone. He then goes on to say that once Beel learns to control his powers, he’ll recommend him as a cherubim and get him a position as a Celestial Realm Gatekeeper. This was a huge boost to Beel’s self esteem, and he’s been grateful to Lucifer ever since - swearing to do everything in his power to protect Lucifer.

Beel then explains to MC that he knows his brothers all love Lucifer too. Because they wouldn’t have fallen with him otherwise. He acknowledges that Satan’s situation was different, but since MC became part of their lives, he was an entirely different demon. In fact, Beel believes the same could be said for the rest of his brothers too, and he likes who his brothers are now with MC around more as well.

He then says this is why he likes MC so much, and MC is given the opportunity to kiss him. After sharing a sweet kiss, Beel corrects himself, stating he doesn’t like MC, but actually loves them.

Favorite Scenes -

Sorcerers’ Society Crest

Mini Luci

Mini Luci 2

The first test

Solomon is amused

Pets and pokes for mini Luci

Levi’s game

RPG life

Fairy Luci

Beel’s history with Lucifer

I love you Beel

[side-shawty]

Burn XIV (Stark!Reader)

XIV: Family Business

Fandom: Marvel (MCU)

Type: series

Prompt/Summary: Family is not just blood.

Pairing(s): Peter Parker x Stark!reader, Tony Stark x daughter!reader

PREVIOUS CHAPTER

•

The next morning you somehow found yourself a tangle of arms and legs with Peter. 

After the initial wariness of your surroundings faded you were still finding it hard to believe this was all real you relaxed into him again. You pushed your face into his chest and breathed in his calming scent as his strong arms unconsciously tightened around you. 

Your eyes slipped closed again and you were almost asleep again when the light sliding of the door opening could be heard. 

You hoped they’d go away once they saw you were both asleep but there was no such peace with the Avengers.

“Aww look at how cute they are. You owe me five bucks Sam,” Natasha spoke.

“No you owe me, I said they’d be attached at the hip within 12 hours and you said 20,” you could practically hear the smirk in his voice.

“Okay, but I said 8 so, both of you pay up,” Bucky interrupted and it took everything in you not to look at them and roll your eyes. 

You could hear the exchange of money and Bucky’s over-enthused “Thank you,” in reply.

Peter groaned beside you and held you closer, “You guys are way too loud,” he told them, eyes still closed.

“And you’re way too stingy, can’t we see her too?” Nat said and you giggled a little at that, effectively blowing your cover.

“She’s up!” Sam said and you and Peter both sat up, rubbing at your eyes and stretching.

“She wants to go back to sleep,” you told them and they laughed lightly.

“No time for that. Time for hugs,” Nat said, coming to your side of the bed. 

Meanwhile, Peter got out of the bed and told you he’d be back with breakfast before kissing your cheek. The simple action made you giddy.

“Bleh,” Bucky fake gagged as Peter left and he and sam sat in his now vacant spot.

You hugged each of them tight, you hadn’t realized how much you missed everyone. 

“So lover boy was here all night, huh?” Sam asked wiggling his eyebrows as if he didn’t know the answer.

“Yes he was, we talked and we slept and I will take no more questions,” you crossed your arms over your chest. 

“That better be it,” Bucky said but there was no threat in his voice that warranted concern.

“Gosh, you’re really showing your age today aren’t you Buck?” Nat teased before turning to you. “Earlier he asked me what an AirPod was,” she laughed and you laughed with her.

“And here I thought you were getting the hang of this new fangled century,” you told him.

“Listen I’m trying okay, everything is so fancy for no reason,” he sulked and you laughed again.

“Seriously though kid, how are you?” Sam questioned and they all looked at you expectantly.

“In one piece,” you said honestly. “Some scrapes and bruises and a cut on the back of my neck that’ll probably scar but I’m alive,” you smiled.

“Was it a shock device?” Bucky asked darkly.

You hesitated before answering, “Yeah.”

Bucky’s metal arm flexed as he balled his hand into a fist, “I’ll fucking kill those HYDRA assholes one day.”

You placed a hand on top of his fist, “Hey,” he looked up at you, “I’m alright. Thanks to all of you I’m here and breathing. I love you guys.” 

Before you knew it they pulled you into a hug and you held back tears giving you their own declarations of love. When Peter came back in with food they all decided to let you eat in peace with your boyfriend. Peter told you the doctors would be here around one and in the meantime, you’d probably get several visitors. 

All too soon, he had to leave for the city, there was only so much school he could avoid without the possibility of not graduating on time. He left with a promise returning that evening and a soft kiss on your lips. 

Before anyone new came in you asked FRIDAY to call your mom downstairs. She helped you shower and change into sweats and one of Peter’s shirts with a wink. She told you that she would have stayed longer but Morgan would be waking up for the day soon. 

Your dad stopped by for a little after she left and after Sam and Bucky blew something up he also had to leave.

The next ones to walk through the door were Steve and Rhodey.

“Well if it isn’t two of my favorite soldiers,” you smiled as they walked in.

“As long as I’m the number one favorite I accept,” Rhodey said before gathering you into his arms for a tight hug.

When he let go Steve was next, “Keep dreaming Rhodes.” 

“Well I would tell you who my favorite was if I thought it wouldn’t hurt your feelings,” you told them as they had taken the same positions as everyone else and sat on either side of you.

“C’mon now Y/N you wouldn’t want to give the old man a heart attack.”

Steve rolled his eyes.

“Anyways, how are you Y/N?” Steve asked.

“Good, healing, y’know? Seems like it’ll be a long process but I feel better than I did when I first woke up last night.”

“I’m glad to hear it, we’re only going up from here.”

“Definitely, by the way, I haven’t seen Thor, Clint, or Bruce today.”

“Thor is off-world, apparently whatever HYDRA used to brainwash Harley is similar to the mind stone so he’s trying to get it out ahead of it,” Steve told you.

“Clint had to run home, Laura is going to give birth soon and Bruce should be by later with your other doctors,” Rhodey finished.

“Ah got it. I cant wait for little Y/N to be born,” you said.

“Yeah because Barton is definitely gonna want to name is kid after the girl who put retractable grates in the vents to mess with him,” Rhodey rolled his eyes.

“Well he shouldn’t have tried to prank me on my own turf.”

“Everywhere is your turf,” Steve said.

You grinned, “Exactly.”

Steve hesitated before speaking again and his face became solemn, “Listen I’m sorry that I couldn’t do more for you that night.”

“So am I, we’re family, I should have protected you,” Rhodey added. They both let their heads hang low.

You took one of each of their hands into you, “You guys, look at me,” they obeyed, “I’m so incredibly happy right now you have no idea. A lot went wrong but I’m okay, even if I do have to spend a couple extra days in here.”

They both smiled at you and things felt okay again. They stayed for a little while longer leaving you with words of encouragement before you were once again left alone.

However, you weren’t suffocating the way you had been at HYDRA. You asked FRIDAY to project the water by the compound onto the right wall, it felt like you could finally release all the tension in your body.

Before you knew it your eyes slipped closed and you fell asleep.

——

You were awakened again by the sound of the door opening, this time Bruce and your dad walked in with —

“Well this is quite the surprise,” you said smiling.

“How could I not visit my favorite fire-wielding hero,” he spoke and made his way over to bring you into a tight hug.

Bruce hugged you next with a smile and then went over to one of the machines you had unhooked when you first woke up. Your dad gave you a kiss on the forehead and then stood beside the other scientist.

“To what do I owe the pleasure Doctor Strange?” You asked.

“You know me,” He took a seat next to you on the bed, “I love popping in and out but after I heard what happen I made sure your dad kept me in the loop. I know magic stuff keeps me busy but I am still your Godfather,” he told you.

“Mystical Godfather,” Tony threw in, “A totally made up title.”

Strange rolled his eyes and silently mocked your dad, “Still a title.”

“Debatable.”

You laughed lightly at their childishness.

“In all seriousness though, your dad ordered a full workup. He said your flames turned purple and wanted to make sure it didn’t damage your body in a non-tradition sense,” he told you and you nodded.

“So I only get a visit if my life at risk?” You asked overdramatically, throwing a hand to your forehead, “You wound me.”

“Haha, very funny. Now sit up straight while I work my … magic,” he said.

“Booo, your jokes have gotten worse since Christine got pregnant,” However, you sat up straight as he stood.

Strange was quick to begin in a flash of warm light symbols surrounded you, several of them had even went in and out of your body. 

After a few minutes, he was finished and the light and symbols faded away. His face was littered with mixed emotions.

“What is it?” You asked, concerned.

“Are you alright?” Strange asked and the question grabbed the attention of Bruce and Tony.

You were confused, “I mean aside from some injuries that might scar I feel fine.”

“Tired? Weak? Foggy mind?” Strange asked.

“Barely, it was bad when I first woke up though. What does that have to do with anything?”

“Part of what a ‘full workup’ is is looking into your soul or aura and it seems like whatever happened when you released those purple flames caused a hole,” Strange explained. 

The room was silent. All three men looked at you anxiously as you sat in shock, you weren’t sure what to say.

“So a piece of he is just poof! Gone?” Tony asked, bewildered at the idea.

“It’s a small piece but essentially, yes. There’s a chance it may come back over time but things like this are usually done only in dire situations of stress or emotional turmoil.”

“Well my situation checks all the boxes,” you said quietly to yourself.

It was then that tour father decided to move from his spot beside Bruce and wrap an arm around your shoulders. 

“Are you alright?” He asked.

“I think so, this is just a lot to process.”

He nodded and the room fell into silence once again.

“Well on the bright side,” Bruce spoke up, “It seems the damage Hydra did to your powers was temporary. If your readings are correct, you should be at 100% in no time,” he finished with a comforting smile.

“Thanks, Bruce. That actually does make me feel a little better,” you smiled with him.

After that Bruce ran a couple more tests and then the three men were gone again. However, your father did leave you your phone which you were beyond grateful for. You were playing a random game on it when Dr. Evans came to give you a quick check-up and update before leaving. 

You had a few more hours of peace before your next visitor decided to show their face, it had to be well after sunset by now. 

There were two knocks on your door and you replied for them to come in. You locked your phone and placed it on your bed as he entered and for some reason seeing him made you lose your breath.

“Harley,” you whispered.

•

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