#I did absolutely nothing to deserve this treatment

[rolandkaros]

some thoughts on doping

people (fans, players, etc.) who complain about special treatment for top players need to deep the fact that the qualms they have with the way that jannik and iga's cases were treated are barely related to the actual cases at hand and more to do with the fact that they believe others have been hard done by harsher treatment. which is an important complaint to verbalize, but directing that frustration at the players you believe are getting "special treatment" is part of what allows that unfairness to continue, because nobody is calling out the root of the problem which comes directly from the organizations in charge of actually managing these cases.

inevitably world #1s will have the money, resources, team, etc. to find the source of the positive test, to justify themselves, to prove their innocence, etc. and while i completely understand the frustration that not everyone has those resources i also don't believe there's any reason for somebody to not use such resources if they have them at their disposal.

so yes, i think it's fair to push for more player support within the realm of doping, but acting as though jannik or iga have done something wrong for utilizing the tools they had is kind of comical to me.

and there's the other side of the coin, wherein these people truly believe these associations are actively covering for guilty players. which brings me to another important point that a complete disbelief in the integrity of the system does absolutely nothing unless it is acted upon. which is to say, if you truly believe that jannik and iga were guilty of doping and the "special treatment" you mention is implying that the atp or wta or itia or wada covered for them, that is a very serious accusation which undermines the integrity of the sport of tennis as a whole. that may sound melodramatic, but i truly think that if you believe these associations are corrupt when it comes to doping (as proposals of "special treatment" in the case of guilt would suggest), i believe you are obligated to advocate against it in a much more substantial way than posting about it on social media. it would be concerning to me if people truly had zero trust for the integrity of organizations like wada and the itia, but continued to consume the sport without raising a question...until a player they don't like gets a positive test.

in all honestly, i don't like how either of the cases were handled. i have problems with both. but i also know that in both cases, they were cleared with no significant fault or negligence as the final verdict (i know wada stepped in with jannik but that's still up in the air so for now i'm disregarding that). i have no reason (or desire) to believe either of them intentionally doped. i do think the main reason they were able to "wrap-up" their cases as quickly and efficiently as they did was due in part to their statuses as top level players. but i don't believe that the verdict was subjectively dependent on it. and i can disagree with how the cases were handled, AND i can say that i think all players deserve better treatment in these processes, AND i can still maintain that i trust the verdict of both cases.

shifting focus slightly, i do think there's a reality where organizations like the atp and wta are self-serving. and it sounds really harsh and unsympathetic, but it also makes sense. the atp and wta have responsibilities as associations to promote tennis, to protect it not only as a sport but also as a brand. the atp spent the entire first half of this year basically promoting jannik as the second coming of christ: obviously they're going to shit their pants when they find out about a positive doping test. it's in their best interest to do everything they can to preserve their own image, to only release such information if they had been completely sure of his guilt. and likewise, it was in their best interest to keep that information quiet even once his innocence was ruled. i'll say myself: it didn't feel right to me that it was kept quiet as long as it was. i do think that, once a case has been handled, it should still be released as public information. but i understand why the atp didn't want to release the information, and i understand why they might not care as much if it was someone ranked outside the top 100 or someone who's never won a tour-level tournament. like i said, it sounds harsh and unsympathetic, but that's business. i don't think it's just but i do think it makes sense.

iga getting a split ban is another example of this. granted, i don't know exactly who decides how punishments are implemented, so it's possible that the wta had no involvement this, but i don't think it was coincidental that the split ban allowed her to play at the finals and bjkc. it makes sense for the wta as a brand and an organization to advocate for her to be able to play those events. [VERY IMPORTANT EDIT: not going to delete what i already said for the sake of transparency, but i've been told that this actually was completely coincidental. a player can return to tour after a provisional suspension as soon as they submit an appeal. so iga was suspended, submitted the appeal, returned to play the finals & bjkc, and then was given a one month ban. the provisional suspension also counted towards the ban.] equally, it makes sense for them to release a statement supporting her, even though they are meant to be unbiased.

so it's not fair. it's not just. but it's not a problem with the integrity of the players, it's a problem with whole procedure. but i think too many people are quick to jump at players like iga and jannik, who yes, got off pretty easy, over something which ultimately has very little to do with them. they showcase the symptoms of underlying problems, but they are not the cause of those problems themselves. and people who rush to blame them need to either evaluate the true source and target of that anger, or they need to have a very real conversation about their trust in organizations such as wada and the itia which truly are meant to be just and fair, without awarding that same trust to organizations like the atp and wta whose concerns are far less objective.

[pallanophblargh]

Had a bit of a “regression” this past week where I had stumbled upon and subsequently ripped open an old wound.

I’m always trying to shed my grudges, but their claws are sunk pretty deeply nonetheless. Between the gaslighting and the casual disregard, it’s hard to find any closure. I have to make my own.

I broke my carbon pencil 3 times, at which point I had to call it quits.

[silenceinternalmonologue]

Somebody asked me to talk about the misconception that Loki is always trying to kill Thor, so here are some thoughts.

When Loki and Thor are children, Thor is the one who expresses bloodlust: "I'll hunt the monsters down and slay them all". We can infer from this scene that Loki was not violent or murderous as a child (unlike a certain scene in Thor: Ragnarok would suggest which, let it be remembered, was completely improvised and therefore not written with Loki's actual character in mind).

Loki never expresses a desire to kill Thor (except on Svartalfheim, and we all know that was a trick).

The closest he comes to this is his command to the Destroyer: "Ensure my brother does not return. Destroy everything." Notice how direct the latter part of the sentence is, while the former is vague and left up to interpretation. This is a partial reach, but I wonder if Loki wouldn't have just told the Destroyer to kill Thor if that's what he really wanted.

Loki had the opportunity to use the Destroyer's death ray on Thor, and he didn't. He chose to slap him instead. Yes, this proved to be nearly fatal, but he could have been much more direct. The Destroyer is a literal killing machine.

Even knowing Thor was mortal, I sincerely doubt Loki believed he would actually die. To Loki, Thor has always been his strong and unbeatable older brother. He has probably seen him mortally wounded hundreds of times and it was probably impossible to imagine him dying from a slap.

Remember that at this point, Loki has no reason to believe that Thor won't try to kill him as soon as he finds out he's Jotun. Thor had been happily killing hundreds of Frost Giants just the week before, and had likely been doing so for the last several hundred years. So even in this "him or me" situation, in the midst of a mental breakdown, moments away from attempting genocide, Loki isn't able to directly attempt to kill Thor.

Loki never even comes close to killing Thor at any other point in the films. They fight on Bifrost, but they're fighting more for control of the mechanism here than with intent to hurt (let alone kill) each other.

In the Avengers, Loki doesn't even pretend to try. He stabs Thor once with a tiny dagger that looks like it affected Thor as much as a bee sting.

In TDW he takes it a step further and sacrifices himself for Thor (or at least tries to). Is the opposite of trying to kill someone trying to die to save them? I feel like it might be.

In Ragnarok he tries to... turn him over to the Grandmaster? I guess? And we get the snake story, but like I already said, that was improv done with no regard for Loki's actual character. And then Loki literally saves the entirety of the Asgardian people and supports Thor becoming king which doesn't seem very murderous to me.

In Infinity War he sacrifices himself for real this time, first throwing away a goddamn INFINITY STONE to tackle Thor to the ground with no thought for his wellbeing and then having the life choked out of him by his greatest fear and tormentor and also oh my god it's been FOUR films since the last time he sort of maybe subjectively tried to kill Thor and he's been actively trying to save him in three of those

This got a bit long and rambly but yeah. No matter how you look at it, Loki's attempt-to-kill-Thor count is either one or zero. That simply doesn't add up to any number high enough to qualify as him "constantly" trying to kill his brother. Also his attempt-to-save-Thor count is by my calculations AT LEAST six, and that's only on-screen and obviously not counting the hundreds of years they spent together before this.

[theheadlessgroom]

@beatingheart-bride

And it was very clear that this was the best gift the children could've gotten that day: After blowing out the candles and having a little cake, Lon and Erika tore into their mountain of gifts with gusto, finding all manner of delights, ranging from storybooks to dolls to costumes for dress-up to a pair of lovely watercolor sets, just to name a few. But while these gifts were delightful, and there was no denying the pair's excitement over them, it was clear that their grandparents staying at Gracey Manor was the most wonderful gift of all.

And while the festivities got underway (with Lon eagerly joining his great-uncles and Wilhelm in a little bobbing for apples, and Erika asking June and Josephine if they wanted to make some spooky arts and crafts with her), Dorian saw an opportunity to speak to his best friend, saying, "I have those fabric designs I'd like you to look at, if you don't mind."

"Oh, not at all!" Randall nodded, setting aside his slice of cake as he took the designs and looked them over, only for his brow to knit together: Bottles and rattles? Little storks? Teddy bears, stars, and moons in pastel pinks and blues?

"Dorian, these are patterns for baby clothes," he frowned. "Why do you want-!!!!"

It was at that moment that it hit him like a ton of bricks, his eyes widening and his jaws dropping open as his head whipped back to look at a smiling Elizabeth and a grinning Dorian. Randall spluttered for a moment, trying to get the words out, but all he could manage to do was point to Elizabeth and stutter out, "-You are?"

"Yes," she grinned, as he then pointed to Dorian, sputtering, "Y-You...you mean...?"

"We do," the young master grinned as he squeezed his wife's hand, saying what he and Elizabeth had been itching to tell their best friends all month long:

"We're expecting!"

[txttletale]

Sorry for anon, I'm shy. I think I'm one of the liberals you're complaining about and I don't want to be. If (and only if) you have the time/energy, could you elaborate more on where the Harris campaign went wrong? I promise I don't mean this in a sealioning way - I genuinely want to understand and move towards a better perspective, but I don't even know what to Google to start.

it is extremely conventional political wisdom that running as the incumbent party during an unpopular administration is a gruelling uphill battle--harris was in this position, and i think going all-in on her continuity with biden, who is extremely disliked (for many reasons, ranging from his fervent passion for genocide to a vague sense that He Made The Ecnomy Bad And Woke) was a catastrophic error that any dickhead with a political science degree would have told her to avoid. unfortunatley she surrounded herself with biden's people who in the run-up to him stepping down had already proven themselves to be completely self-deluding and isolated from reality.

the absolute worst thing you can do in the electoral situation harris was in is go on television and say "i would do absolutely nothing differently to the current (unpopular) administration" and she did literally exactly that.

other facts are that the constituency her campaign decided to go all-in on, of, like, sensible moderate center-right republicans who value bipartisanship, basically hasn't existed since tea party birtherism became ascnedant in the republican party if it ever did at all. the idea that there was an election-winning segment of voeters who would vote for harris if she proved that she wasn't "too liberal" through serious policy commitments to right-wing positions was just not founded in reality--like it was a strategy that failed to grapple with the basic reality that the modern republican position on democrat politicians is that they're adrenochrome-chugging child rapists.

in a similar vein her hard pivot to border fascism was morally deplorable but also a total waste of time because donald "build the wall" trump has made his personal brand synonymous with anti-immigration politics and so she was simply never ever going to win anyone over from him on that ground. & finally of course there was the campaign;'s wholehearted and total contempt for her own potential voters, which manifseted most obviously and evilly in their treatment of anti-genocide protestors and their flying bill clinton out ot michigan to lecture arabs about how they deserved to be bombed but also seems responsible for their total lack of consideration of (again) conventional elecvtoral tactics 101 like "energizing the base" or "getting out the vote"

so tldr it was just a disastrous campaign that prioritized the egos of biden campaign staff and biden himself over winning or facing basic reality

[nariism]

you're mad at him.

you're mad at him and he knows it. you've been giving wriothesley the silent treatment ever since you arrived at the fortress of meropide, bandages in hand and a flurry of curses erupting nonstop from your mouth.

not a single word has been uttered between you since you sat him down in his office. despite refusing to speak to him, much less look him in the eye, you're dutifully bandaging up his raw knuckles like you remember sigewinne showing you back when she decided to go on vacation.

"it's very easy," her voice rings in your ears. you bite your tongue to prevent yourself from snarking back at her imaginary presence.

you only hoped she was enjoying herself up on the surface, accompanying neuvillette for the first time in ages. while she absolutely did deserve a vacation, you wished that she had given wriothesley a stern set of instructions to take care of himself in her absence.

if she did, maybe you wouldn't have had to come all the way down here just to witness him in such a state. your poor heart can't take this kind of worry.

the warden has come out the pankration the most unscathed, only sporting a split lip and bloody nose. his knuckles are red and cut, but it's nothing in comparison to the two inmates who had decided it was a good idea to incite a riot in what should be a controlled environment of the prison.

physically, he's fine. emotionally, he's having a complete meltdown.

he can't take this silence anymore; can't bear having you be upset with him, knowing that he should have been more careful about rushing in to stop the riot himself. the prison is crawling with guards for a reason, yet in his haste he decided it would be faster to intervene alone.

"hey," wriothesley calls out softly, timid despite his looming presence over you. "i didn't mean to worry you or–"

"why can't you be more careful?" you suddenly interrupt, voice cracking weakly. you gaze up from where you're kneeling on the floor, bandages halting in the air while you challenge him with your eyes. "don't you know how stupid and reckless that was?"

he holds your stare for a few moments, stunned by your sudden rebuttal. and then you tear your eyes away from his again, focusing back on tenderly wrapping up his hand.

"you always make me so worried staying down here day and night," you continue, voice so quiet he can barely make out your words.

"i'm sorry," he tells you earnestly.

"i know you're strong. i know it. but you're not invincible. would it kill you to cherish your life a little more?"

"i'm sorry," he says again.

you falter, a sigh escaping you as you peer up at him again. there's something softer in the way you look at him now, with all your frustration melting away into concern. you rummage through your bag for a wet wipe before standing to cradle his face.

wriothesley can't breathe when you're being so gentle with him. his hands find your waist and squeeze it to draw you even closer, until he can almost rest his head against your stomach.

"i love you," you finally tell him, and he feels the relief wash over him. "i can't stand seeing you hurt, so please be more careful."

you swipe the cloth under his nose a few times, gently dabbing at the skin and cleaning up the blood that has dried there. his steely eyes drift shut under your warm touch, allowing you to clean his face. when he only nods in response, your hand stops.

"promise me."

he looks at you again, a brow raised at your stern tone. but he would always relent to you, no matter what it is you wanted.

"i promise."

you blink down at him for a second, taking in how beautiful he is underneath his bloody nose. finally, you lean down to kiss the top of his head— a gesture of forgiveness and love that he's grown so accustomed to.

there's sunshine in your smile when you pull away from him to discard the used wipe, all previous signs of anguish gone from your expression.

his heart nearly stops at the sight.

you were right. he should cherish himself more. he can't stand seeing you fret over him even if it is a little endearing.

for now, he'll just enjoy having you take care of him. it's been so long since he returned to the surface, all he wants to do right now is bask in the light you bring down here with you.

"oh nurse," he teases, giving your hips another squeeze. "my lip got busted, too. got a remedy?"

you roll your eyes but press a kiss to his lips anyways.

© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.

[junrenjun]

love and lacrosse jackets

pe teacher!vernon x chemistry teacher!reader (fem)

genre: fluff

wc: 3k

warnings: reader is referred to as ms. (and other fem pronouns), reader wears vernon's clothes

a/n: this is not an understand series update and i apologize for that. however, here's a vernon teacher au with a little side of lacrosse and dad!seungcheol

You were suddenly thrown out of your thoughts by one of your students sighing and turning from her worksheet. “Ms. y/n, can I ask a question?” 

You knew this student, Maya, was likely trying to get out of doing her assignment. She was too smart for her own good. “Depends. Is it about the worksheet?” 

She paused for a second, turning her head slightly away in order to avoid your gaze. “...no.”

You continued. “Do you need to go to the bathroom or the nurse?”

Maya sighed and mumbled, “no.”

You turned back to your computer while giving your final response. “Then I think you know the answer. I would be happy to talk to you once you’ve balanced all those equations.” 

You should’ve known she wasn’t giving up that easily. If anything, she probably gave up halfway through the worksheet because she knew the answers and was just looking for something to entertain herself. “Mr. Chwe lets us ask him questions all the time.”

You snorted. “Mr. Chwe is a PE teacher Maya. You don’t have worksheets to do in his classes. Unfortunately, you do in chemistry. So please finish this or at least study for your quiz next week.” 

Maya was apparently taken aback by this. She was quick to defend herself, saying, “how do you know we don’t do worksheets in PE?”

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes. Maybe you should've been a college professor instead of a high school teacher. “I’m the girls lacrosse coach and he’s the boys coach. We spend a lot of time together and I’ve never once seen him make a worksheet.” 

An evil grin spread across Maya’s face. You internally groaned at this. That expression means she’s up to absolutely no good. She turned and tapped on her partner’s arm. Great, now she’s distracting other students too. “Henry, wouldn’t Ms. y/n and Mr. Chwe make a cute couple?” He grinned and started going off on a tangent about how funny it would be if the two lacrosse coaches were dating. 

This conversation really took a turn for the worse, didn’t it? There’s nothing you could do but groan, out loud this time, and put your head in your hands. Your neighboring teacher, Mr. Seokmin, really has impeccable timing though. He stuck his head through your door and grabbed your attention a few moments later. “Hey Ms. y/n, do you have a student that can run an errand for me real quick?”

Now was your chance. “Maya, since you seem to have no interest in balancing any more equations, why don’t you go help Mr. Seokmin?”

Before she could protest, the physics teacher grinned brightly at her before exclaiming, “perfect! Come on Maya, I need someone to help me carry these projects to the library.” Once she was finally out of the room, you breathed a sigh of relief. 

It didn’t last long though because your other students suddenly started giggling and murmuring amongst each other. Henry, who was still turned toward you, decided he needed to continue Maya’s antics in her absence. “You did say you and Mr. Chwe were close.” More giggles were heard. 

You’re not sure what you did to deserve this treatment from your 3rd hour honors class of all people, but clearly it was something. “Alright if you all don’t go back to your work I’m not offering any extra credit on this next quiz.” The rest of the hour passed in silence. 

“What’s with the long face?” Vernon thought the joking would cheer his best player up, but it just made Henry frown even more. 

After a few moments of silence, he finally answered, “I had a quiz in chemistry today. Don’t think I did too well on it.”

Vernon was quick to ask him which teacher he had. “Your favorite, Ms. y/n,” Henry responded. 

The PE teacher rolled his eyes at the comment but still clapped his hand on the player’s shoulder. “You’ll be fine, kid. She offers extra credit. But she also told me you and Maya were pestering her the other day instead of doing your work, so maybe you should put a little more effort into understanding the material next time.”

Henry grumbled, knowing nothing good would come of an argument. “Yeah, whatever you say Coach.” Then, he dropped his bag on the ground and ran out onto the field to start warming up.

Vernon felt someone approach him from behind. “See dude, even the kids can pick up on you and y/n’s chemistry. Haha, get it? Chemistry? Y/n teaches chemistry.” The head coach could barely restrain himself from flicking Mingyu in the forehead. He was a great assistant coach, but an incredibly annoying friend. 

“Why can’t I just be friends with a coworker and fellow lacrosse coach?” Vernon complained. Mingyu simply watched on as his friend continued. “Just because we’re both single doesn’t mean we should get together. I mean she’s really cool and works really well with the kids. And she’s an insane lacrosse player, an even better coach too. I think she could get the girls to state this year. I just think…” He’s cut off by Mingyu smacking his arm. 

For once, he’s grateful for the assistant coach’s intrusion, because he turns around to find you jogging up to him. Weird, he thought to himself, since you and the girls have a game today. You skid to a stop next to the two, and make eye contact with him. “You don’t happen to have an extra SVHS shirt do you? I think I forgot my coaching shirt at home today and I really don’t want Seungcheol getting on my ass for it.” 

Vernon’s world comes crashing down at that moment. Maybe he does have a teensy little crush on you. Because the thought of you wearing his clothes has him swooning. Mingyu, ever so helpful, snaps him out of the moment by clearing his throat to yell at the boys for messing around. Vernon blinks at you for a second before stammering out, “uh yeah I think so,” and reaching into his bag. He pulls out a gray quarter zip with the words “SVHS” and “Coach Chwe” embroidered on the chest. He debates hiding it from your sight and shoving it back in his bag to save you both the embarrassment, but he knows how strict Seungcheol is as an athletic director. 

He eventually tosses it to you, stuttering out something about good luck while watching you throw it over your head. Once it’s on you say, “I have the same one, so hopefully no one sees the difference. Thanks Chwe.” He can’t even process your words because his brain is simply malfunctioning seeing you in his clothes, especially ones that say his name. He’s no better than his high schoolers. Before he knows it, you’re turning on your heel and jogging back to the main field. 

Someone comes up behind him, filling Mingyu’s absence, since the assistant coach ran off to lead practice drills in the middle of Vernon’s little crisis. He hears the lacrosse captain snickering and then telling him, “damn Coach, you’ve got it bad. You’re redder than a tomato.”

Vernon simply cannot handle it any further. “Oscar, for heaven’s sake, please shut your mouth and go back to practice.” Oscar throws his hands up in mock defense, before grabbing the ball that rolled over to Vernon’s feet and running back onto the field.

You really need to give Vernon his coach’s jacket back. It didn’t help that you weren’t a morning person, and seemed to accidentally leave it at home whenever you left for work each day. It also maybe didn’t help that it smelled just like the boy’s lacrosse coach, who, admittedly, smelled pretty damn good. But, you couldn’t hoard Vernon’s things forever. You were lucky enough that you had gone a week without him mentioning the jacket at all, which you chalked up to him knowing you were busy.

Tomorrow, you told yourself. Tomorrow you would take the jacket back to school and give it to him. You even laid it out with your own jacket, which you were going to wear the next since you had a game anyways. That, however, was a mistake. Because in the morning, groggy from lack of sleep, you accidentally threw on Vernon’s jacket and shoved your own into your work bag. 

How no one told you until 3rd period, you’re not quite sure. Mainly because Seokmin had specifically complimented your outfit when you visited him before your first class. You thought maybe it was because you were wearing a new pair of pants. Clearly it was not and the physics teacher was using it as a means to tease you (and Vernon by proxy). If only you had known.

Maya stepped into your classroom extra peppy that day, which was already a recipe for disaster. The fact that she was the one to catch that you were wearing Mr. Chwe’s zip-up certainly did not help. A gasped “oh my god” stopped you in the middle of your lecture. You pointedly looked at the girl before asking, “Maya, is everything alright?”

The poor girl could barely contain her excitement, practically shaking in her seat. “You’re dating Mr. Chwe! I knew it!”

You were caught so off-guard that it took you a while to respond. “Maya, where did you even get that idea from? And you’re being disruptive, I’m trying to teach about equilibrium.” 

She stood from her seat and pointed at you, before excitedly exclaiming, “your jacket. You’re wearing Mr. Chwe’s jacket!” You looked down and, sure enough, Vernon’s name was plastered across the chest. To put it plainly, you were mortified. In fact, you’re pretty sure you’ve embarrassed yourself even more when you don’t respond for a solid minute. 

Finally, when you’re done wallowing in pity in front of a bunch of 16 year olds, you make your way to your desk and pull out a hall pass. You hand it to Maya swiftly before telling her, “if you’re too invested in this to learn chemistry, go bother Mr. Chwe about it. It’s his planning period.” She gapes up at you before scrambling out of the room.

You turn back to the rest of the class, making sure to pointedly look at Henry. “No other questions about my love life?”

A deadly silence spreads across the room. Henry sinks back in his chair but you watch a hand creep up from the back of the classroom. You sigh and call on the girl. She’s clearly surprised you even allowed her to speak, because the question is whispered to the point you can barely hear it. “Why do you have Mr. Chwe’s jacket?”

The inquiry is enough to throw you off the deep end. “Ok, I’m not teaching the rest of class. I don’t care what you guys do as it’s either A) not disruptive or B) asking me about my personal life.” 

Seungcheol is surprised when there is a knock on the athletic office door in the middle of 3rd period. Students should be in class and if it were a staff member, they would have just let themselves in. He tells whoever it is to come in and is slightly less surprised to see Maya standing in front of him. She doesn’t let him speak first, quickly letting out, “do you know where Mr. Chwe is?”

He raises an eyebrow at the girl. “You got a hall pass kid?” he fires back. Maya waves the piece of paper around in his face. He rolls his eyes. 

She puts her hands on her hips and looks pointedly at him. “Seriously though. Do you know where Mr. Chwe is? It’s supposed to be his planning period or something.”

Seungcheol is still confused why she needs to see Vernon in the middle of 3rd hour and how she managed a hall pass for it. “Why?”

Maya plops down on the chair in front of his desk with a sigh, clearly this conversation was not happening without a little bit of a fight. “Ms. y/n sent me to ask him a question.”

The athletic director can’t help but let out a snort at the girl’s comment. Maya is suddenly interested in his reaction. “Why is that so funny? Do you think they’re dating too?”

Seungcheol is surprised yet again. “Do you think they’re dating?”

Now Maya snorts. “Obviously. Ms. y/n is wearing his lacrosse jacket today.” She laughs when the man’s eyes practically bulge out of his skull. He rustles around his desk, grabbing a notepad and writing another hall pass for the girl.

After scribbling for a second, he passes the note to the girl and tells her, “Mr. Chwe is in his office, room 218.”

The girl grabs the note from his hands and gleefully gets up to skip out the door. She stops midway through and calls out over her shoulder, “thanks Dad!”

“I’m not dating Ms. y/n, Maya. You know that.” Vernon sighs exasperatedly. “Why are you even asking me this?”

He knows he’s in for trouble when she smirks. “She’s wearing your coaching jacket today. Care to explain that?”

Vernon knows he should’ve asked for it back sooner rather than later. But he was secretly hoping that he would be able to see it on you one more time. And the longer you have it, the more likely it’s going to come back smelling like you (not that Vernon cares anyways right?). He doesn’t miss a beat though, explaining to Maya that he lent you his jacket for a game and that you probably mixed it up with your own. She’s not impressed, but she knows it’s an explanation that’s most likely true. This doesn’t stop her from interrogating Vernon further. “Do you want to date Ms. y/n?”

His silence is incriminating. He can tell by Maya’s mile wide grin. Trying to put an end to it, the lacrosse coach stands up from his desk, telling her that he’ll walk her back to whatever class she left from.

One tiny important detail he forgot is that you teach 3rd hour honors chemistry. A class that one of his players, Henry, shares with Maya. And he’s currently standing outside your door, watching as you type away on your computer. Sure enough, “Mr. Chwe” is embroidered across the chest. Vernon thinks he might combust on the spot. His student clearly picks up on this, muttering something about how she’s “seen middle schoolers with more balls.” 

He waits outside your door as Maya enters the room. There’s only a few minutes left of the period, so he figured it would be better for both of you to talk away from prying eyes. As the bell rings, he patiently watches the students trickle out your door. When he’s sure that everyone is gone, he steps into the doorway. What he does not expect is for you to walk straight into his chest, stumbling back with the cutest “oomph” he’s ever heard. 

Vernon is stunned but you look completely mortified. Probably because you just ran into the man whose jacket you’re wearing basically without his consent. His assumption is correct because you start mumbling out apologies. “I’m so sorry I thought this was my jacket when I grabbed it this morning. I didn’t mean to wear it today, I made such a mess of this. I shouldn’t have even asked for it in the first place. I was just about to change, give me a second I…”

The lacrosse coach cuts you off in the middle of your little rant. “Do you want to go out with me after your game on Friday?” 

You blink at him, not even processing the words he just said. When you finally do, your cheeks flush and you glance down at your watch. “Do you think you can ask me that in like 4 hours, Chwe?”

Vernon has no idea what you mean by that. He gawks a little bit. Do you need time to think about it? Are you not interested? Do you already have a boyfriend? Shit, he should’ve thought this through.

You break him out of his little trance with a small chuckle. “We’re on the clock Vernon. And you have a class in three minutes.” 

He glances at his watch. His freshman PE class is probably waiting for him. He mumbles something about meeting him on the main field before practice. Then he’s out the door. You’re left there, stunned, still in his jacket. You don’t bother to take it off the rest of the day.

A few hours later, Mingyu and Seokmin are watching you both converse from afar. Vernon’s cheeks are the reddest they’ve ever been. You’re fidgeting nervously but also smiling. It seems to be going well. Seokmin turns to the assistant coach before saying, “took them long enough.”

They hear someone approaching and turn to see Seungcheol. “You both owe me $20.” 

Both the teachers roll their eyes at him but reach for their wallets. Maya pops up from their other side, walking up to her father. “I should be getting at least half of that. I did all the work.” 

Seungcheol grunts, pondering her proposition. He turns to her. “What about this? You can either get $20 now or $200 if y/n is Mrs. Chwe before you graduate college?”

Maya’s eyes brighten and that sinister smile spreads across her cheeks once again. “Deal.” (She’s $200 richer at her college graduation).

[hannieehaee]

them accidentally ditching you on your bday pt. 2 - hhu

content: angsty, gender neutral, established relationship, conflict resolution, direct continuation to this, fluff, happy ending, etc.

part 1

wc: 3889

a/n: literally so many ppl requested thisjhdf im glad u guys liked it!! im working on vu and pu versions for this rn btw <3

masterlist

seungcheol -

seungcheol sat there for a minute or so, simply pondering at what had just happened. it was 100% his fault, that was something he was very well aware of. he knew that it had simply slipped his mind, but that did not wipe away the hurt he saw in your eyes upon entering your shared apartment. knowing that you had been waiting for him all day made him feel like an asshole. he couldn't believe that he had forgotten about your birthday even upon coming home at midnight the night prior. he felt like such a hypocrite, always whining at people to give him royalty treatment on his birthday but absolutely ignoring you during yours. you, his most favorite person.

he felt hurt that you had decided to spend the night with some friends, instead of in the arms of your boyfriend, but he understood. this was what he deserved. god knew that he wouldve pulled out all the dramatics if you had done the same to him, which was why he was now at a standstill, not knowing what he should do. he wanted to see you so badly, get on his knees and apologize, letting you know over and over again that you were the most vital person in his life and that forgetting you was something that not even he could forgive himself for.

now, he could've sat there and lamented himself over his stupid mistake, or he could run after you before you made it out of the building. he did not want you going to bed angry, or much worse, sad, so he picked the latter and got off his ass to chase after you, not caring about his current exhaustion as he took the stairs rather than the elevator in order to be able to catch up to you before you made it to your car.

luckily for him, he was able to catch you just as you stepped out of the elevator (having ran down five flights of stairs and almost injuring himself in the process), completely unsuspecting to his sudden ambush. he hadn't noticed until now, but you had dressed up, clearly ready to go clubbing or partying with your friends. he felt bad to get in the way of your plans. no, he felt horrible to accidentally ditch you and then ruin your plans. but he needed to at least try and make amends. he knew that if this were him, he'd want you to try and make it up to him.

you jumped back a bit at seungcheol's sudden apparition as you rounded the corner upon exiting the elevator, seemingly not having expected him to come after you.

"cheol, what are you doing?", you didn't seem mad, but your tone let him know you were clearly not content with him.

okay, he didn't think as far as this. his main goal was just to convince you to stay, then he would come up with a way to make it up to you.

"baby, i ... i'm so sorry. i know how hypocritical this is coming from me. i never meant to forget, you know that! there's nothing i can do to make up for having forgotten about you today, but please, please let me try."

"cheol .. i don't know," you paused, "last year when i texted you at 12:03 you complained about it for over an hour. you're the one always making a big deal about this. i assumed you'd care when the shoe was on your foot, but apparently not."

"i do! i do care. baby, please. let me take you out. ditch your friends. i'll take you somewhere. anywhere. i'll even take you out tomorrow too! i'll take the day off. how does that sound?"

"you cant take the day off, cheol. you're an idol-"

"i dont care! they can come and try to drag me away from you if they want. i want to be with you. please let me. please don't leave. cant stand the thought of you going to sleep alone after what i did."

you chuckled at the first half of his statement, feeling touched at the second part of it.

"are you sure?"

he scoffed, deciding to go on a leap and hold onto your hands, pulling you closer to him, "yes! there's nothing i wanted to do more today than be with you! it mightve slipped my mind that today was the day, but i had a beautiful day for us planned, baby. will you let me show you? please?"

cheol knew it was hard for you to say no to him, specially when he whined and pouted at you, giving you his best performance in order for you to understand how badly he felt. it didn't take much more for you to break, finally letting a smile graced your face as you squeezed his hands in yours.

"you better make this worth my while, choi seungcheol," god, he hated when anyone called him that, but you were the exception.

"always."

wonwoo -

wonwoo was astonished at himself, for lack of a better word. he had never been more disappointed in himself than in this moment. sure, he didn't take birthdays too seriously, and he knew you didn't either, but you always made him feel so special on his day he had only wanted to do the same. he was a lowkey guy, so his ways of showing love sometimes went unnoticed by most people, except for you. you accepted the subtlety of his love, loving him all the more for it. he felt terrible that today he showed you the exact opposite of what he had planned. he had taken weeks to perfect the dinner he had wanted to make for you, having prepared a romantic night for the two of you. all he wanted was to make you feel loved as he held you through the night, but his plan had stupidly slipped his mind.

what kind of asshole ditches their significant other on their birthday? for a stupid video game out of all things? as soon as wonwoo communicated what you had texted him to mingyu, his roommate couldn't help but scold him, telling him this was very uncharacteristic of him. which it was. everyone knew wonwoo to be a very sensible guy. it was very rare for anyone to have their feelings hurt by wonwoo. the guy was just simply too emotionally intelligent to ever be perceived as a hurtful individual. except now he had shown a careless part of himself that rarely ever faced the surface.

he was unsure of what to do. it was clear by your messages that you did not want to see him. you quite literally had asked him to not come. your texts to him were always filled with love, somehow being able to have your affections to him transcend even through text. but these were cold, and with good reason. still, wonwoo did not want to give up. the only thing that would be worse than ditching you on your birthday would be to stay where he was, knowing you were not only upset but also hurt by his actions. or rather, lack there of.

so, wonwoo was now on his way to you. well, to your apartment. you had mentioned in your messages that you would be out with friends due to his absence. it killed him that you had chosen to be with your friends over him, but he was fully aware that he only had himself to blame for that. he was glad you at least had someone to be with while his forgetfulness kept him away from you.

he had a key to your apartment, often heading over to fall asleep in your arms after a grueling day of being an idol. upon arriving there, he knew you'd be gone, so he allowed himself in, hauling in all the ingredients he had packed with him in order to make you the dinner he had been planning all these weeks. he was unsure of when you'd arrive back home, so he needed to hurry just in case. there was also a chance you'd come back in the early hours of the morning, knowing you would sometimes stay out with your friends til 1 or 2 in the am. having practiced this dinner multiple times, wonwoo was able to have it all done by 10, hoping that you'd arrive soon so the dinner wouldn't go to waste. he took care of the ambience, lighting candles and even moving furniture aside to make space for his set up. all he had to do now was wait for your arrival.

it had taken you around two hours to arrive. wonwoo had simply sat there waiting for you, not wanting to contact you as to not disturb you. okay, maybe he had maniacally texted you back earlier, apologizing for his mistake over and over, but had received no response, so he had decided it'd be best to just wait for you to arrive on your own. and now you were here, crossing the door to your apartment.

you stopped upon spotting him, widening your eyes before taking note of the dinner table behind him, "wonwoo? what are you doing here?"

he smiled sadly at you, slightly unsure of what to say, "i cooked for you," he paused, continuing upon seeing your confusion, "im so sorry. time got the best of me. i cant believe it slipped my mind. i knew it was today, but i got too distracted. i never wanted to make you feel like i didnt care. i do. so much."

you stood there without saying anything, still carrying a slightly shocked expression on your face. so he continued.

"baby ... please, have a meal with me. i prepared all this for you. this is what i had planned for today, if only i hadnt forgotten. let me make it up to you, please. i already called off tomorrow. i had a whole day planned for us, but i'll do whatever you want. if you want me to leave, i will. just, please. i need you to know how much i care. i love you, you're everything."

you continued to stare at him for a bit, a soft smile slowly breaking into your features before responding.

"nonu .. you didn't have to do all this. i'm sorry if i made you worry. this is ... it's such a sweet gesture. of course i want you to stay. all i wanted all day was to be with you," it melted his heart that you had wanted him all day, but were separated by none other than himself.

he pulled you into his arms halfway through your response, humming as he felt you hug him back. nothing felt as nice as your touch against his.

"im so sorry, beautiful. this will never happen again, i promise."

"i love you, wonwoo. thank you."

"happy birthday."

mingyu -

mingyu had never hauled ass quicker than at that moment, not even bothering to say goodbye to his roommate before grabbing a jacket and sprinting out of the door.

he couldn't believe his behavior towards you. you had always been a top priority to him, and to now realize he had forgotten your birthday gutted him tremendously. but what got to him even more was the knowledge that you had probably been waiting all day for him, having agreed beforehand that he would make space for you on your special day even through his packed comeback schedule. the sole thought that you, the bestest person he had ever met, had sat alone waiting for him all day, made him feel like the worst boyfriend. so now he was quite literally running in order to get to you.

the dryness of your voice during that call should've been the first hint that something was wrong, but what really made the alarms go off in his head was your lack of response when he said 'i love you' to you. mingyu knew it was dumb to care so much about it, but he thrived off words of affirmation, so your lack of response made him immediately assume something was wrong. you had never not reciprocated his words of affection, much less hung up on him. the moment he expressed his concerns to wonwoo, he was reminded by his roommate that 'oh wait, isn't it their birthday this week?' suddenly his mind started spiraling, now remembering that he had forgotten his boyfriend duties on the most important day.

it didn't take him too long to get to your apartment. okay, he didn't actually run there, he was just being a tad bit dramatic. but dramatics were necessary in this situation, which is why the moment you begrudgingly opened the door after his incessant knocks, allowing him inside, he immediately dropped to his knees, looking up at you as he rambled apologies at you.

"baby, i'm so fucking sorry. god, i don't know how i forgot. i swear the day just slipped my mind. i had plans ready, i swear! i've just been so busy with the comeback- not that that's an excuse! you have every reason to be mad at me. it won't happen again, i promise, i-" mingyu wasn't sure when exactly he was going to stop listing off constant apologies to you. he wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying at this point, just repeating himself over and over again, letting it slip past him that you were now standing above him, holding in your amusement at the state of the pleading man before you.

"mingyu, please get up."

like an obedient boy, he got up, now towering over you as he usually did. he immediately held onto your hands, bringing them up to his chest as he continued his apologies.

"you have every right to be mad at me. i neglected you and forgot about you when i shouldn't have. i didn't even wanna come home to wonwoo tonight! i wanted to come to you! but we have a schedule early tomorrow morning, so it was just easier. but i'll cancel! i'll stay here with you! i wanna make it up to you-"

"mingyu, shut up!"

that was enough for him to slam his mouth shut immediately, looking at you as he waited for your next command words.

"mingyu, listen. i understand. i was hurt you forgot, but i understand you're really busy right now, okay? i'm not angry at you. you don't have to cancel your schedule either. i don't want to get in the way of-"

"i'll do it! you're my top priority, baby. you know that."

"i still don't want you to cancel, gyu. it's fine. i'm not angry. i appreciate your apology. just wanted to be with you today .. i'm sorry if i made you worry," you looked down, almost as if embarrassed by having felt hurt by his actions. this made mingyu melt with guilt.

"no, baby. fuck. how can i make this up to you? can i stay here tonight? hmm? i'll cook you dinner and wake you up with breakfast. i'll even cut my schedule short for tomorrow so i can be back home with you earlier. how's that sound?"

"sounds perfect mingyu, thank you," he took this as confirmation to finally hold you in his arms, swaying you back and forth as he hummed the birthday song lightly against your ear, causing you to giggle against him.

vernon -

everyone was aware that vernon could sometimes be a little too chill for his own good. he didn't make too big of a deal about most things, simply going with the flow and allowing things to evolve on their own. except that could not be done in this situation. right now, he needed to make a choice. give you your space, or run home to you, tail between his legs as he apologized for ever having forgotten about you. the last thing vernon would ever want was for you to not feel the immense amount of love he's always had for you. he knew he could be bad at showing it sometimes, but you were the absolute love of his life, which made him feel devastated over and over again as he kept rereading your texts.

'maybe you should stay at the dorms tonight. not really in the mood for you to spend the night. im sorry. love you.' that was what you had last sent to him exactly thirty-eight minutes ago. how could he just sit with that for the rest of the night? specially when all he wanted to do was be with you and hold you and kiss you and show you how incredibly obsessed with you he was. he was never good with dates, but he had always gotten any and all dates pertaining to you right thus far. he even had a gift for you he had purchased a few months back, but he had stupidly forgotten the day he had been preparing for was this week. this mistake was an outlier, truly, but it hurt you nonetheless, which was all vernon cared about at the moment. he couldn't believe you'd been having to hint at your birthday while your boyfriend remained clueless. you must've felt so dejected. he winced at the thought.

however, right now was not a time for lamentations. even if you kicked him out and told him to get fucked, vernon had to at least try to come home to you now. he quickly went over the situation with his members, explaining that he had been a total douchebag and neglected you. that earned him scoldings from all members present, calling him all types of names and demanding he head over to your apartment right this instant to beg for forgiveness and hope you wouldn't just send him right back.

so now he was on his way to you, despite you having instructed him to stay away. he wanted to respect your wishes, but he couldn't go to sleep tonight knowing your heart was still hurt because of him. he needed to at least see you and have you know that he was willing to try and mend things. vernon wasn't one for public displays, nor was he one for dramatics, but he was willing to pull all stops for you if it meant you'd forgive him. which was why he was currently running through the hybe hallways as he called up his driver to be ready to take him to your apartment as soon as he reached the parking lot.

he had had time to think over a game plan on the way over, except nothing came to mind. the two of you had never fought before. sure, there had been a few minuscule spats here and there, but he had never seen you angry at him before; he'd never given any reason to be until now. he didn't want to freak out over this, but knew how hurtful it must've been for you to feel so neglected by the person who's supposed to love you most, so he felt a pit in his stomach with the worry that maybe this would be enough for you to finally snap at his forgetful tendencies and end it. he didn't have much time to think about this, however, as he now stood in front of your apartment door, fearful of knocking on it.

the decision to open the door was made for him, as you incidentally opened it yourself, yelping at his apparition on the other side of it.

"vernon? what are you doing here?", you didn't seem angry. you seemed more confused at his presence. that was good.

"i- uh ... i'm sorry."

okay, kind of a bad start.

"vernon. i told you not to come over tonight. i'm sorry, i'm not really in the mood to see you right now," even though you didn't appear angry, your eyes wouldn't meet his, making him deflate a bit.

"are you mad at me? i'm so sorry. i didnt mean to forget, i swear," vernon knew there wasn't much he could say past that, but he wanted you to at least know he regretted his neglect.

"i'm not angry, vernon. i'm just a little ... sad. i tried to be subtle about it. i mean, i dont even care for my birthday that much, but i hoped my boyfriend would at least remember it."

"baby, god. i am so fucking sorry. i never meant to make you feel like i didn't care. it just slipped my mind. i know it's not a valid excuse, but i need you to know that it doesnt mean anything. i'm just a fucking idiot. i'm sorry."

he was rambling now. somehow you being hurt by him trumped the chance of you being mad.

"vernon, it's fine. i dont want you beating yourself up about it. i'll get over it. i just need space tonight. i was about to go meet with a friend before you got here," you seemed like you just wanted to get out of the situation, clearly feeling awkward at even expressing your disappointment at him. it made vernon feel like even more of an asshole.

"no! be mad! you shouldn't get over it. i should be making it up to you. stay. please. i'll do anything you want. i'll take tomorrow off. we can do something together. anything you want. i have a gift for you and everything! i got it while in japan, the date just slipped my mind, i swear. please stay. i don't want to leave you alone if i made you sad. please."

"vernon ..."

"please. i don't want to force you. if you want to leave, i'll accept it, but let me make it up to you. i dont want you to feel like i dont care. i do. i know i dont express it much, that's on me. i'll make it known. i'll show you. i don't want to hurt you again, i-"

he was unable to finish his sentence, now stumbling back due to a sudden weight against him. you, with your arms now wrapped around him as your face nuzzled his neck. he instinctively wrapped his arms around you, squeezing you in as he lowered his head to breathe you in, humming as he felt the relief of having you in his hold.

you pulled away too quickly for his liking, eyes slightly glossy but not enough to consider it worrisome, "i forgive you. i'm sorry, i didn't mean to exaggerate. i did feel neglected, but-"

"but nothing. don't apologize, please. this won't happen again, okay? i love you."

"i love you too," you smiled at him before pausing, "i .. do you wanna come in?", you seemed a bit sheepish, probably feeling awkward at hearing vernon ramble apologies at you for the past five minutes, showing way more emotion than he usually did.

"come in? oh, you're not leaving? wait, don't answer that. yes," he held onto your hand before you could say anything, pulling you in for a quick kiss before leading you into your apartment, all under the promise to make up for his previous carelessness and never make you doubt his affections for you ever again.

[yourdeluluescapist]

SHACKLES| Bangchan X Fem!reader| Request! @jiyeonslays

A/N: For some reason, anytime I give a date on anything. Life decides to hit me with its trials. Romance for some reason hinders fanfics. It was supposed to only take 2 days, but apparently my love life didn't like that answer. But i did put in more effort to make it a little more worth it. <3

Warnings: smut, creampie, semi rough sex, half angst half fluff.

WC:1617.

✧

It’d been 2 years since he went to jail for murdering him. You’d wished it hadn’t been labeled murder, it was just much needed vindication. He did it for you, to protect you, to make sure nothing came between him and his love. But thankfully, he was released today. And you were damn well gonna give him a warm welcome.

---

The price of safety from another almost felt like it wasn’t worth it. You’d missed Chan ever since he was locked up, even if it was legally wrong. It was the only way, the only exceptional thing that could’ve been done to keep you safe. You knew damn well if he didn’t do what he did, it would’ve broken you. 

You normally weren’t the one that thought killing another should ever be an option. But the pain, the abuse that went under every type, and the downright disgusting treatment of you.  It felt right, divine intervention, the only call that could begin to rectify and convict your ex of his act of torture.

Hours upon hours of his verbal berating, his fist clutching whenever you didn’t agree, and the pain from being treated like nothing and only seen as another thing on the earth that stole breath from the earth. 

But Chan? He saved you from that, freed you from that torment and showed you what real love was. Being treated like you mattered was refreshing and very much needed. He took care of you even after all the reassuring that killing him was the right decision. Throughout all he did, you were still never prepared to watch someone you hated with all of your being, simply die in front of you.

Trauma was never something you’d wanted to have to stomach, but knowing it all. You almost wished you pulled the trigger instead of Chan.

But all reminiscing made you forget the fact that you had ignored while rethinking all of this while spread out in your bed.

He’d be getting released today, and right now? You should have already been on the road..

A heavy groan and slow, yet heavy hand slowly dragging down your face. You clothed your naked body, got your keys, and left to start this dreadfully long 2 hour drive.

- - - 

He got into the passenger seat of your car, the look on his face looking different after so long. But his aura hasn't changed, he was still the same chan. Even after taking the life of a man who absolutely deserved it. That comforting smile still melted your heart, and all you wanted to see was that smile you had missed so much. All day, all night. 

“Hey, baby. It's been a while huh? Did you miss me?” Chan turned his head to you, smiling ear to ear as he studied your face again.

“Don’t ask me something stupid like that,” You leaned over from your seat and hugged him. “Of course I did, you know that.” You slightly pouted.

“Hey I was joking.” He chuckled, his tone softening from how much he missed you too. “I know you did, and you’re well aware I did too.” He embraced you and placed a gentle, clasping hand behind your head and kissed the top of your head.

”I wrote and sent you things every day! Even your favorite books, and sometimes those pictures we took a while ago.” You pulled yourself away from him to give him his space.

“And I thanked you for all of that. Especially those nude ones, I needed something to pleasure myself too.” He smirked, leaning onto the car down and placing his head on his fist.

“Even in prison, you're still a walking, talking cock.” You put the car in drive and pull out the lot.

“One you’d always happily service” He said in a jumpy tone, shooting a playful punch at your elbow.

Once you guys got on the road, silence and whatever was on the radio made the ambience of the car for the next hour. Though quiet, it was sweet. Being with him after all this time, you didn’t care how you spent your time with him.

Thinking back on all the unhinged and fun conversations you shared in this same car bestowed a lingering smile on your face. It was so good to see him again. Every part of your body pulsated and quivered with pent up excitement and libido. Being near him brought it all back, you haven’t done the deed with anyone since then, and you thought.

“God, I missed him badly. I’m wet just sitting next to him now, I’m so pent up I could just strip him and take him whole..” 

Knowing that, that's what you were going to do. You wanted him to take you whole, you’d been waiting for him to touch you, to fuck you, just simply kiss you after all this time. You just yearned for another time where his key would unlock your hole.

- - -

The feeling of being picked up and slammed on this bed he used to always take you on was lip biting. He didn’t waste a second when you shot the offer of. 

“Tonight, I don’t care what you do to me. Whatever hole you please, however rough you wanna do me. I just want you to fuck me crazy.” 

“Was this what you were waiting for? Just for me to fuck you like a slut?” He asked in a husky voice, his hands dancing against your breast. 

“Mhm.” You moaned at his touch, “That’s exactly what I want, I’ve been waiting years for this. I need you bad okay?” You quiver at every movement, you haven’t been so tense at a man’s touch since then. It feels like you couldn’t even handle this let alone full blown fucking. But your body told you, it wanted it all. 

“Well okay princess, I'm gonna have my way with you okay?” He leaned down, being mere inches away from your neck and began to pepper you down.

You nod in agreement, his lips feeling like butterfly wings across your skin as he kisses around your neck, slowly going down the line and making it to your clavicle, playfully nibbling at it and getting more sensual everytime your body shakes in pleasure. 

He groaned as his kisses got lower and the depth between each one getting harder and harder. You had basically begged for him to hurry up and get down to your pussy. Though he knew that, and he loved taking his sweet time to savor every part of you. To tease and to annoy you. 

“Oh, Chan!” You screamed, “Just get down there already, I'm begging you I can't take it anymore.” 

Taking what you said into playful consideration, he stopped kissing you from top to bottom and quickly dragged his tongue down your torso until he was met face to face with your sopping wet entrance.

He was like a plumber the way his tongue plunged his tongue in and out of your vagina. Also following that, the onslaught of a very much invited finger joined in to make sure your pipes were cleaned. 

He only sucked more and more, kept changing from fast and slow with his fingers. You couldn't handle it anymore, your body knew it couldn't hold that orgasm any longer. And knowing that, you came all over his face and his fingers.

“That's only the first time, sweetheart. He uttered, licking his finger clean and beginning to take his briefs off. Releasing his rock hard cock, veins bulging all the way from the tip down. Tense and ready to reunite with its plaything once more.

He had crawled on top of you, showing every ounce of his muscular body like it was in 4k. His big chest, his bolstering biceps, and chiseled abs. Also not ignoring his huge package that was waiting to get in the back of your truck.

“Are you finally gonna actually fuck me? You know I hate that foreplay shit, I'm too horny for that.” You playfully pout at him, a seductive smirk growing on your face.

“Mhm,” He began to drag his tip around your clit, covering it in all of your sweet juices. “Just you like it.” He said as he rammed it inside you, a strong sexual moan escaping your mouth with pants following its path.

“Oh my, FUCK. I needed this, after so long I’ve been begging to be filled up like this again. His cock is just playing inside me, I can feel every throb with double the effect. My pussy is just hugging him back with every time that dick shows me it still wants me.

He didn't beat around the bush this time, his strokes went deep. In and out repeatedly, harder and harder with every second that passed. You could feel him getting closer and closer, and you only began to think more wildly. Making you wrap your arms around his torso, your grip tight as he started to pound you harder. 

“Cum inside me, Chan. Please, I want it so bad.” 

“As you wish, princess.” He replied, going balls deep inside you and releasing a fat load inside you. One that would definitely knock you up.

You pant and pant feeling his cum course through your vagina.

After he dropped that inside you, he had basically collapsed on top of you, obviously wore out after so long without sex. Though he was heavy this was the only time that you would let this happen .So you caressed his head and your fingers through his hair as he cuddled up on you. 

You missed this and would do anything to keep this forevermore.

[hotchtits]

hotch and elle and the killing of their respective 'main' unsubs

if i see one more fucking person say

"oh its so unfair that elle got fired for killing a guy when hotch literally did the same thing and everyone praised him for it"

i think i just might lose it

lets break this down and actually think critically about this

when hotch literally did the same thing

wrong!! what did hotch actually do?

hunted down an escaped (after being arrested and identified) and prolific serial killer that had assaulted him in his own home and targeted his family

listened to said serial killer murder his wife over the phone

entered a literal fight to the death with the serial killer where he had to beat him to death with his bare hands because otherwise both him and his son would have been murdered next

it was self defense. pure and simple. he had no gun, no weapon other than his hands and he knew that if he stepped away, it would be over. there is quite literally nothing else could have done.

what did elle do?

hunted down an uncharged and unconfirmed suspect

tried to provoke him into attacking her

when that didn't work, shot him and planted evidence as well as lie about what happened when the police arrived

did the guy deserve it? absolutely. he was a scumbag and a rapist and deserved to die. but the show makes her actions inexcusable for a reason. you cannot do that as a law enforcement officer. you cannot go and shoot someone who is not actively threatening you, especially not without evidence. additionally, the reason he was uncharged was because she panicked during the undercover mission.

i agree that she definitely wasn't ready for it, and that someone else should have been the bait but she was asked and she confirmed that she would be okay.

"but they should have realised that she would have panicked" why? up until that point, she had been a brilliant agent and had never given any indication that she might not be able to do it. again, she told both hotch and gideon that she'd be fine. why would they doubt her? she's good at her job.

everyone praised him for it

also wrong!! emily and rossi look at him in nothing short of horror when they run in to find him beating foyet to a pulp. even morgan, while comforting him, is obviously disturbed by the scene.

hotch and his team also faced a hearing about the aftermath of the case. it didnt matter that foyet had been stopped and that he and his son were safe, he still had to justify every single action he took.

there's another counterargument here that "well they might not have praised him for it but they understood why he did it" and... yeah? again, self defense.

anyway. this is one of those topics that makes my blood boil. i love elle. do i think they way they never brought her up again was unfair? yes. do i think that the way she suffered because of a choice gideon made was unfair? yes. was she wrong for shooting that guy? honestly i'm kind of glad she did.

but im sick of people saying that their circumstances were the same because they weren't.

people also love to cite misogyny here and while CM has a fair amount of it (dont get me started on the treatment of paget and aj) its not fucking misogynistic to recognize that what elle did was illegal and hotch didn't "get a pass" for what he did just because "hes a man"

TLDR: stop comparing elle and hotch's situations with the intention of pointing out the inequality of their treatments because their situations were in no way comparable.

[33-16]

i can't believe we have to keep making this point every few months but nothing, absolutely nothing will ever justify the way that max was treated by jos as a kid. that treatment did not make him the person he is today, he is that person, kind and the light of so many people, despite all the harsh treatment he's received. he deserves so so much better than he was ever given and anyone who justifies this abuse is just as bad as the abuser themselves.

[honeygrahambitch]

"What the hell is that?" Will asked as he almost dropped his phone. He forgot about scrolling and got up from the bed. Hannibal froze. He was just about to put on his shirt.

"What exactly?" He asked as if he didn't know what Will was referring to.

Will pulled the shirt off his arms and his eyes remained stuck to the huge bruise on his right ribs. It looked as if it was painted in all the shades of purple.

Hannibal didn't say anything, just like a child who is waiting to get scolded.

"How are you even able to...do anything while having this?"

"It's nothing. Ouch." He gasped as Will poked him with his index finger.

"I assume you have some broken ribs."

"You are not a doctor, you cannot make this kind of assumptions."

"Where is this from?"

"I might have fallen off my motor last week. It was not my fault."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Is this some kind of interrogation?"

"No, this is some kind of me caring about what happened to you. Half of your body is fucking purple."

"You can't fix it, now can you?"

"No but I can definitely make it worse."

"Dirty talk?"

"Shut up, isn't it bad enough that you will be a pillow princess for the next weeks?"

"That's not necessary. The bruise doesn't stop me from doing anything."

"You can't even kneel."

"Probably not but you can."

"I'm leaving for work. Don't text me."

"The silent treatment? Very original. And for what? Because I didn't report this to you?"

"The silent treatment bothers you? Let's see how healthy communication makes you feel. I am very upset, Hannibal, because I feel like we should share this kind of things in a relationship. This is a big deal. To me, at least."

"The healthy communication is appreciated however if it was you in my place, you wouldn't have mentioned it either. Correct?"

Will didn't know what to say. "This is not about me. Take some responsibility."

"Alright."

"That meaning what?" Will asked and crossed his arms, waiting for some kind of resolution.

"I did not think you would make a big deal out of it. I thought you would just roll your eyes and tell me that that is what I deserve for using a motorbike."

"Don't get me wrong, I hate it even more now and I will still roll my eyes but not because I don't care but because you thought I wouldn't care."

Hannibal raised an eyebrow.

"I don't need you to feel like you have to put on a strong facade. I like you vulnerable just as much as I like you arrogant."

Hannibal softened to that. Even the pain ceased to exist after hearing those words coming from Will's mouth.

"Then you should know I have taken so many painkillers in the last days that I feel like I am constantly drunk."

"You're an idiot. That's why you didn't let me join you in the shower two nights ago. I would have seen..."

"Yes. And when Jack Crawford patted my back yesterday I thought I would snap his neck like a twig."

"I can't believe I haven't noticed it myself. This is on me too."

"I am very good at pretending everything is alright, darling, don't blame yourself."

"Yeah, well, be good at not pretending because next time that happens I will break your ribs and I am not even kidding."

"I know. Even if it sounds tempting, I will sit that one out."

"Weirdo." Will commented under his breath. "I'm seriously leaving for work. Don't get too drunk on painkillers and call me if anything. I mean it."

"Absolutely."

"When I'm back we'll see if you can kneel."

[hazblog-hoetells]

A lot of fics are like "aftercare? You'd be lucky of Vox even handed you a towel" but like listen ok. Listen to me.

Vox is gonna be the one that feels the dopamine drop the most. He's very accustomed to not tying feelings to sex because he's only ever been around toxic people, so he often sees it as a sort of boom, done, that's the end of it. BUT.

This guy's ego is fragile. When one minute his partner is moaning his name and begging for him, and then the next minute acting like nothing happened, it hits him kinda hard. One of his weak spots is thinking he's a passing fad and knowing deep down that his fame and popularity are superficial and that he doesn't have any real connections to other people.

What I'm saying is, you gotta be the one to take the initiative here. Because he really just doesn't think to do it. Even just kissing him or rubbing his back or holding his hand after just has him...confused. And praising him? Oh boy. Whether it's "you did so well" or "that was amazing" his breath catches in his chest and he doesn't know how to respond. He's trying to find a way to sound like he's in control by saying something smug like "Yeah, I know" but he can't, his brain is focusing on what kind of mind games he thinks you're playing. He's not gonna let you get the jump on him.

He doesn't really understand why you're sticking around after you already got what you came(lol) for. His brain just won't make the connection that you like to be around him for reasons other than getting dicked down. You'd have to nearly treat him like a doll for him to get the idea. He's confused the whole time you help him get cleaned up and get something to drink and just lay next to him. He absolutely doesn't hate it, but he just doesn't understand why you're doing it.

Now, while half his mind is in utter turmoil thinking you're playing 5D chess with his brain, the other half is through the fucking ROOF. He won't ever say it out loud but this feeling of being taken care of is doing funny things to him. The more narcissistic parts of him think he deserves that kind of treatment anyway, but there's a weird twist in his chest at the fact that he never asked you to do any of it. You weren't doing it out of any kind of real obligation, he never tried to force you or manipulate you to do it. You acted like it was the most natural thing in the world. It takes him a long time to get used to, but he does start to reciprocate.

He knows what to do, he just has a really hard time letting himself do it. Vulnerability is NOT his strong suit. It's awkward at first, but eventually he takes a lot of pride in it. He likes to "win" at aftercare. Making sure you're cared for gives him a sense of accomplishment in addition to that funny, fuzzy feeling that makes his words get caught in his throat.

This machine is FRAGILE; Handle with care

[peoplesgraves]

I have yandere thoughts yet again

Imagine being a Model and you literally can’t get away from obsession.

Yandere Fans cover their walls in pictures of you. They rip out every magazine page your included on and papermache them above the ceiling so you can look down on them every day. If you have shoot with other models they’ll use those too but with cut/scratch the other people out or even crop their face over the other person. If you ever did a meet and greet it would be absolutely packed and would likely get shut down because everyone’s fighting over who’s your biggest fan and who loves you the most. Those who do manage to meet you end up lovesick,sobbing messes so the pictures usually turn out bad. But the fans don’t mind as long as you look good in them.

Yandere Models all want to be pictured with you and they’ll do anything to make it happen. From blackmailing other models to drop out or bribing whoever’s casting, nothing is too dirty or too illegal if it means getting to spend all that time with you. Models will starve themselves and do all matter of dangerous treatments or plastic surgery just to have a leg up and hopefully be chosen to pose alongside you. It doesn’t matter how much it hurts or how much they lose, it’s all worth it to have all the tabloid gossiping about the two of you after the latest editorial you were pictured in together.

Yandere Photographers who only care about you. Who call you their muse and only ever take perfect pictures. They’ll take awful pictures of other models who they feel are a threat to your career until they’ve been all blackballed from the industry. If you have shoots with other people then there’s a super noticeable difference in quality over the way you look and the way other people look. The photographer obviously plays favorites but no ones going to say anything. It’s what his muse deserves.

A Yandere Stylist who is just a little too cheeky. Always staring obviously at your lips when putting gloss on or making jokes about having to punish you if you smear your makeup one more time. They’re always jovial and smiling but there’s something dark in their eyes that only you get to see. Their touch lingers when they’re tailoring your clothes and their hands go from professional to more like a lover whenever they’re helping you take 100 Bobby pins out of your hair. They’re always by your side always joking and touching and waiting for the second you get lipstick on your teeth or a fly away.

A Yandere Manager whos always on your nerves. Who’s older and has more experience. They always have some excuse for steamrolling over you and just making whatever decision they want for you. They’ll keep you in line with their connections and their influence. In a way you both get what you want. You’re the most loved and sought after model in the industry and they have you too dependent on them to ever try to leave. Stylists and photographers are a dime a dozen but your manager has your entire career in his grasp.

Yandere Paparazzi who are ironically more ethical towards you as yanderes then they would be if they were normal. They don’t take bad pictures or catch anything embarrassing about you, or at least not that they show publicly. They might snap a few pictures at vulnerable moments to keep just for them, they’re the only ones who get to see you like that. While they may do their best to protect your reputation the same can’t be said for anyone else. They’ll slander other models left and right. Wether it’s true or a little editing magic they’re good at swaying the public opinion against anyone they need to. Just let them watch from the sidelines and you’ll never have to worry again.

[nicossolaceo]

Please block and report Nqueso-emergency. She just attacked a journalist on Twitter for no reason.

She is harassing and attacking people non stop and she's taking absolutely ZERO accountability for her actions.

Yesterday she attacked a journalist that covers 911 because she did not like the character Whitney wrote about. She mocked the journalist whom is a WOC and tried to steal her phrase "bestie boo" as some sort of insult.

When she was asked today to hold herself accountable for what happened by bullying the media person.

"I didn't send anything directly to her."

Like everything that comes out of your mouth is a lie.

You can make up all the cousins, the aunties, the family members from set all you want. And you can change your URL but you're the rotten person you always have been Nqueso-Emergency aka Kinardscoffee aka Bree.

And if you still wanna play stupid, you literally word for word attacked Whitney the same way "kinardscoffee" attacked Lizzie on Twitter back in May but you wanna sit here and continue to play dumb. And I got those screenshots as well "bestie boo."

You were kicked out of the Bucktommy fanbase for a being an evil racist person and was literally called out and deleted your account and now you're back to what? Cause chaos and be even more racist. You clearly did not learn your lesson cause here you are now doing the same shit and attacking innocent people.

911 fans block and report this account, she's a fraud and she is a disgusting person.

Whitney did not deserve this, she did NOTHING wrong to deserve this treatment.

Hold yourself accountable nqueso-emergency/kinardscoffee/bree or get out.

[evellynssocbrainrot]

This is mostly to speak in defense of this post made by @starsandscars81

First of all, my intention isn’t to gatekeep anyone else’s take or opinion on this subject matter. If you think differently that’s completely fine. It’s none of my business. 

Anyway, on to the analysis.

Kaz and the Darkling are, without a doubt, two of the most flawed characters in the Grishaverse. They’ve both done bad things and certainly aren’t good people. Even so, I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again: comparing Kaz to the Darkling is still… extreme. And just not it. By comparison, no matter how much awful stuff Kaz has done, it’s no joke that he is over a million times better than the Darkling. 

The Darkling definitely didn’t start off as an evil character, and all his intentions aren’t horrible either. His main motivation is to help the Grisha, his people who have faced years worth of discrimination. He worked hard and built the second army and the Little Palace, which became a kind of haven for Grisha to come together and exercise their gifts. And coming from someone who dislikes the Darkling, I can tell you now that that is wonderful. I’m glad that he’s doing his best and defending his people. That is great. But even then, you can’t deny that some of the things that the Darkling has done on that path are borderline disgusting. The first being massacring hundreds, if not thousands of innocent people. Even if he’s doing it for the sake of his people, killing so many people who are not at fault is not an act of a selfless hero, but pure villainy and cruelty. And what’s worse is that he did this several times. Not just once, and without second thought. Reminders that these innocent people included harmless children.

The rest of the horrible deeds he’s done all come down to his treatment of Alina Starkov (and a bit of Genya Safin, as well). Whether you like Darklina or not, never forget or sugarcoat the idea that he ABUSED her. He may have loved her, he may have understood her, but he hurt her. Over and over again. He lied to her and hid his true intentions. He placed a collar on her and touched her without consent. He stole her power and claimed her as if she was nothing but an object. He was possessive of her and emotionally tormented her even after she ran away. He killed the only mother figure she had and completely destroyed her childhood home. He was absolutely disgusting. There is nothing at all to forgive and redeem. He was already beyond redemption when he created the Fold. And once again, IT DOESN’T MATTER if he loved her. It doesn’t matter at all when he did nothing but hurt her to such extreme amounts and would have continued to if he ever won, or if Darklina actually became canon. 

And what makes the Darkling even worse is that he doesn’t regret any of it. This is where he truly can be labeled as a heartless and cruel monster. He doesn’t express so much as even a sliver of remorse over his inhuman behavior. He doesn’t feel bad. He doesn’t reflect on it or think about it. In fact, he still believes himself to be in the right. He doesn’t even realize how awful he is. Doesn’t show any sign of improving himself. I mourn the person he could have been. I mourn Aleksander Morozova. But I will never defend the person he is today. I will always believe that the death he was given was far too light and SHOULD have been worse. It’s what he deserves. 

He didn’t start evil, but he became evil. He had hundreds of years to rethink his actions but never did. He wanted to defend his people, but you don’t do that by expanding the Fold and causing further destruction. You don’t do that with pointless mass murder. He loved Alina, but you don’t express that by ruining her life. Once upon a time, he was a young hurt boy, but now he’s nothing but a revolting, monstrous and horrible psychopath.

With that said, now I’ll move on to Kaz.

He is not a good person. I’ll tell you that now. I’m not at all defending the bad things that he’s done. Neither am I ignoring his bad qualities. He is manipulative, cruel, and violent. When he freed Inej from the Menagerie, his intentions weren’t to save her, but to temporarily make use of her skills. I know this, and I’m not dismissing it.

But here are some things that set him apart from the Darkling.

The first being that almost everything Kaz does has reason. There is ALWAYS a reason. His rage is targeted at hyper-specific people. People who deserve it. He killed Oomen, but because he hurt Inej to the point that she nearly died. He dropped a man from a tower, but because that man blackmailed a Zemeni sex worker. He destroyed Van Eck and his empire, but because Van Eck was a bitch. He spent all his life trying to crush Pekka Rollins, and he did, but because Pekka ruined his life. “Kaz Brekker always had his reasons.” The Darkling had no reason to commit mass murder and hurt Alina. 

The second thing is boundaries. The Darkling didn’t have fucking boundaries. Kaz, on the other hand, no matter the amount of violence and destruction he commits, never crosses some lines. He never ever raped or sexually assaulted anyone, he never hurts innocent people, he never hurts children, and never actually spread firepox around the city of Ketterdam. 

The third being awareness. This is a big one. The Darkling, in his path of vengeance, hardly considers his environment, the people around him, who he should get mad at and who he shouldn’t. And even after the horrible deed is done, as I said before, there’s no remorse and regret. For Kaz it’s the opposite. He is hyper aware of where he is. Who he’s with. He’s careful and considerate. And for some of the horrible things he’s done, despite how understandable and trauma-inflicted they are, he regrets them. He feels bad. He knows he’s not a good person. He knows he is awful. He knows he isn’t worthy of Inej. When he was drowning in the waters of Fjerda, it wasn’t himself he was thinking of. It was his crew, Inej. He was worried for them. He blamed himself for the positions they were in and vowed that no matter what, he would save them. He would fix this mess. The same applies in the next book, when they were all trapped in the Geldrenner hotel. It’s himself Kaz blamed, nobody else. 

We don’t even need to tell Kaz that he’s awful. Because he already knows it and wholeheartedly believes it. And unlike so many other similar male characters in YA fiction, Kaz desperately wished that he could change. Perhaps he doesn’t say this openly, but you know deep down that he doesn’t want to be this way. He doesn’t want this life or the trauma. 

Speaking of the trauma, so much of what Kaz does is because of it. Does it excuse his behavior? Certainly not. But it does help with understanding why. And even now, the consequences he suffers from the trauma are bad, but still don’t excuse what he does. Kaz himself thinks so. 

Kaz was a boy who was hurt, like the Darkling was. He lost someone important, like the Darkling did. But the way he responded to that was immensely different. Even the desire for money is understandable when you realize that the lack of it was what made him and his brother end up on the streets. And the money he got, he literally spent a large portion of it to buy Inej a ship and remake the Emerald Palace into the Silver Six. And before that, he gave up the last of it he had left to pay off Inej’s contract.

AND, speaking of Inej. Only someone extremely stupid would say that the way he treats her is the same as the way the Darkling treats Alina. The dynamic is messy and flawed, but they are young. It’s understandable if they fail from time to time. But overall, Kaz respects Inej. He adores Inej. He’s devoted to Inej. He’s loyal to Inej. He wouldn’t betray or abandon her for all the gold in the world. He’s protective of her, but not possessive. When he sees other people get close to her, he’s jealous. But not because he wants to keep Inej to himself, but because he wants to be able to get close to her like that as well. He realizes the wrong ways he treats her, and then proceeds to claim that he isn’t so bad that he can’t pull himself together for her. He spends a good portion of Crooked Kingdom going out of his way to make up for his behavior and it shows. It doesn’t make him any better a person, but it does make him a far better lover. A worthy book boyfriend <333.

Outside of Inej, you can see how much he cares about his crew. He protects them, he the Parem from Nina, he refuses to give it to Jesper, he gives Wylan advice like a big brother, he gave them all time to rest and recharge in the Geldrenner hotel while dragging his aching body all the way to the Slat to gather more people for his plan. He gave his crew every single resource he had left and even then, contributed alongside them when putting his plan to action. The Slat and the Dregs themselves have become a safe space for young people who don’t have a family or a place to go. He may be selfish with the world, but with them he’s nothing but the most selfless person to ever exist. 

The list is endless, honestly, but this is why it doesn't make any sense to compare Kaz to the Darkling. If I were in a life and death situation, and I was forced to put my trust in one person, Kaz or the Darkling, I would choose Kaz in a heartbeat.

Damn, this took way too long.