#I can. Of course I can. the fuck am I gonna do if I don't write?
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littelovelunette · 1 day ago
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Can you write a story where Vi got reader pregnant and but before they find out she is pregnant she thinks she just had the flu (this is how I found out… but I’m not talented enough to project it in writing and I don’t wanna use AI so could you please!)
Not Flu, Is It?
Vi x Pregnant!Reader
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It's been a few days you were woken early in the mornings with a wave of nausea.
You shrugged it off, it was flu season and given your terribe and weak immune system, you were sure you'd just caught flu.
And so was Vi, she was helping you through it with flu treatments and medication too.
Goodness, was Vi so worried for you.
Ome of those days, you were laid next to Vi who was stroking your hair lovingly before suddenly, her expression changed, one of confusion, "Baby, did you get your period this month?"
"No," you looked up, your voice weak from the constant throwing up and sickness, "I think not, everything's been so hectic I just lost track of it."
"Throwing up, missed period, tummy ache," Vi listed off all your symptoms, hands running down your back in a soothing manner, "Even an idiot could've reasoned you might just be pregnant."
"I am?" You mumbled, burying your face in the crook of her neck.
"We can't be so sure like that, I'll go run down to the store and get you some tests, okay?" Vi tilted your head up so you could meet her gaze, you gave her a small smile and a nod.
"Mm..." You stared at her as if waiting for her to add something to her last words, puppy eyed gaze lingering on Vi.
"... And some chocolates, I got you," Vi gave you a reassuring squeeze before she got up, keys jingling and jacket rustling as she quickly got herself ready.
Once Vi was decently dressed she gave your a forehead kiss, "Call me if you need anything, I won't be gone long."
You grinned weakly and nodded, "Ba-bye."
A little while later, Vi returned with the pregnancy tests and the door clicked open, "Hey, babe, I'm back," she said, her voice wavering from nervousness as she walked inside the shared apartment.
She set the tests down, "So," she looked at you, "Do you wanna just take them now? Or..."
You got up, grabbing one test up, "Should I take two at once? It would be safer in case I get a false," you said, reading the instructions on the box.
"Sounds 'bout right, just— I never had to do I don't know," Vi said awkwardly scratching the back of her neck.
You giggled before picking up two tests and disappearing in the bathroom.
"I'll still be here if you need me," Vi quickly added, leaning against the wall next to the bathroom door.
"Peeing on a stick shouldn't be that hard, right?" You called from the bathroom. Vi would've replied before she heard you do exactly what you said. That knocked the words down her throat.
"Y—...eah," Vi managed.
A little bit later, you put the tests on the bathroom counter waiting according to what the box said, "After 15 minutes it'll show," you told Vi.
Vi nodded and held your hand, "You nervous?"
"Of course I am, I never thought of being a mother until now and suddenly now that I think about it— you're gonna call me crazy but— I'm sorta' praying I am pregnant," you looked up at her, "Does that make me crazy?"
"No, of course not," Vi said reassuringly, rubbing circles on the back of your hand, "I respect whatever choice you make, it's your body," she smiled, "But of course I am happier that you choose to keep the child if you are pregnant."
You giggled and leaned against her body, "Because I'll finally be able to hold something over your head—"
"How? You're short as fuck," Vi looked down at you as if to exaggerate her point.
"Not that, you idiot!" You shoved her playfully, "I meant, I'll be able to say 'I gave birth to your child' whenever we fight and I get to use the labour hours to my advantage," you smirked, glancing at the test.
"Oh, you are evil," Vi said, also averting her gaze to the test.
"Only the finest."
The moment 15 minutes were over, you checked the tests and sure enough, it read positive.
You looked at Vi, who was already teary eyed, she picked you up bridal style and just squeezed you close like she'd merge herself with you.
"Oh my goodness," Vi whispered staring at the tests, "We're gonna be parents."
"Mhm," you giggled, leaning your head against Vi's chest, "Meaning you're gonna be doing whatever I tell you to because I call the shots."
"Got it, ma'am," Vi said with mock obedience making you roll your eyes.
"Y'know what— p-put me down, I think I'm feeling super pukey," you said and Vi quickly let you down, you opened your mouth to say something but shook your head, turning back to the toilet and retching.
"Well, you can start being a diva maybe after the morning sickness is over," Vi held your hair back, a small smile on her lips.
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agirlwholovesrockstars · 1 day ago
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𝚑𝚎𝚢 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛 | e.m
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ᡣ𐭩 pairings : Eddie Munson x Popular!FEM!reader
ᡣ𐭩 wc : Eddie being a dork and a gentleman, I must warn you that this is going to be so fluffy, no use of y/n, establishing a relationship, sprinkle of angst, Robin is besties with reader, Eddie is pretty much unfazed and oblivious about readers hints to him
ᡣ𐭩 navigation : EDDIE MUNSON | AGATHA'S MAIN PAGE
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"So, how do I look?" You twirl around to give a full 360 of your entire ensemble
"Girl, come on, you always looked good" Robin huffs as she stood up at the edge of your bed, muttering words under her breath
"I just needed to make sure" you fixed your blouse once more and pull down your denim skirt
You tweak your makeup and hair one last time until Robin had you scraping off your feet at the mirror by the door of your house as you rolled your eyes as she hands your keys to your house as she goes over to your car
You scoff, "Robs, in a few weeks, it will be the happy heart's day week"
"And so?" she says as she opens the passenger seat
You gasp as you clutch dramatically on your chest, "I needed to get ready as much as possible before the biggest event begins"
Robin chuckled as she shakes her head, "Babe, you always looked perfect even when there's no occasion!"
"Thank you!"
"What?"
"That's what I needed to hear because getting ready is not made for the weak"
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You sit with your friends at lunch, Robin is over there with Nancy where you should've been sitting but you got a duty to fill in
Outside of school, that's where who you wanted to be and on the inside you're just pretending and it feels absolutely exhausting and you don't feel like yourself anymore
You do not enjoy it
Sooner or later, you're gonna cut off silently of the "group" that you're hanging out with
You feel how plastic and fake everyone are, the fact that you always have to look good all the time to maintain your fucking what.....social status? your reputation at school? I mean, ever since they made you "popular" (even it's against your will they just pulled you into their world) completely changed everything for you
You gonna have to stay consistent and you have to follow what are the trends are, of course, the popular ones should always be on the track
You even became conscious on the things that you aren't even paying attention that includes your body and face
While you're on the thought of dissecting at how bullshit social class at school, Unbeknownst to you, there's one person in the cafeteria who is clearly admires you
It's expensive and the fact that you always have to invest on every little thing that you and Robin know that you don't even needed it
What's the point of anything?
You don't even like what they're talking about always gossiping about every student in Hawkins, the varsity boys are always been so fucking disgusting at how they kiss and tell, you try to put a facade that you're interested
The only real ones there is Chrissy
Robin keeps an eye out for you, "I just know she's on the edge"
"Who?" Nancy asks as she follows Robin's line of sight as she hums
"Yeah, probably, she has to leave them for own good"
"Wait, nance, look" She points out
Robin and Nancy watches the infamous long haired rockstar passing through slowly at the table that you are sitting
"You should try the facial cream that I am using" Rebecca suggest as she inspects your outfit
He can sense your uncomfort as he continues listening
God, you feel like a fucking animal at a zoo
"S-Sure" you stutter as you forced a small smile
"Rebecca, stop, she looks fine!" Chrissy defends you as she rolls her eyes as she puts on a lipgloss
"Well, she's gonna have to keep up with us if she still wants to be included" she shrugs as if her words don't sting you
"What the hell? Rebecca? she can't even can catch a break-" Chrissy reasons with her but someone else interrupted
He doesn't even mean to pry but can't help but eavesdrop on your ridiculous conversation
"I think you look fantastic"
You, Chrissy, and Rebecca and the rest of the group looked turn their heads as their faces grimaced when their eyes fall into the opponent except you and Chrissy but he didn't care about them
He only looks at you, he didn't even falter, he didn't broke the eye contact when you finally do look at him
The way he saids it, it just felt so genuine, you know deep within your heart, it's bad to have someone such as a man to validate your feelings, no, that's not what you're looking for
What you're looking for is someone who is authentic enough not to see you as a girl who always trying to impress others (you don't even have to if we're being honest) but you want someone to view you as a human being
"Thank you" you say shyly as you flash him a smile
"Anytime" he says with a wink that made your cheeks flushed before he walks away getting back to his table
Chrissy grins beside you as she nudges your shoulder, she giggles as you bite your bottom lip to hide your smile
Rebecca watches the whole exchange as she overheard the boys "as if he could pull her" they snicker, she slowly turns around her head at the metalhead with a stern look on her face as she snaps you out of it
"Hey! don't even think about it"
"Boys like him are dangerous"
Granted, that you don't know him well enough, but he has always been so kind even for just small gestures like that, it is just insane that everybody else assumes that he is unpleasant person, you couldn't even stand it, let alone letting this disrespectful comment slide
Before you could even stop yourself, "Oh really? I am much more scared of the boys that we had in our clique"
The boys are scoffing as you flip them off, you know they can't say anything because they're fucking cowards that's what, they're just beefy with you because hell, you can't let them boys have you, they're so untrustworthy, only wanting you to be bedded and headed out to next victim, it's sickening
you're the only one who can talk to Rebecca like that, the one with the sharp tongue not afraid to fight back
Chrissy almost spat her drink as she puts her cup on the table to compose herself
A couple of collective "oohs" threw in your way making Rebecca abruptly stop retouching her makeup as she puts down her compact mirror to squint her eyes at you
She incredulously laughs as she leans forward closer to you, "Don't come running at me crying getting your heartbroken to some guy with no future"
You glare at her, "No, I won't, you'll see"
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Robin is right
You're fucking close to ditch them
Rebecca's words echoed into your brain "It's the policy, wanna stick with us? you're gonna fake it till you make it"
You're so uncomfortable and it's so itchy that it actually makes you wanna scream and tear the clothes to shreds
Who the fuck that you let them rule you?
Being a people pleaser is such a draining and makes your sanity crumble
"Lose the jacket"
Out of your ear ringing rage someone in the back spoke up as you close the door on your locker
As you live and breathe
It's him
You look at him bewildered as he opens his mouth again but closes it as he motions for you to take off your tacky jacket that Rebecca advices you to wear every goddamn Thursday because of the outfit policy for the campus, it's so bullshit
You finally registered what he's trying to tell you as you take it off in a swift move
You decided to wrap it in your waist as you can breath easily and your skin isn't irritated anymore
"What do you think?" You look at your outfit but in his eyes, even though it isn't your style and it's also not exactly your style as well but to him?
It fits you and only you can wear something like that
"Better"
You smile at him as he gives you a tight nod, you taken a notice of his attire, he always dresses up real nice (it's actually what you wanted, the freedom to do what you want)
"Oh, are you auditioning for the talent show?"
His brows shoots up in your imply, "Y-Yeah, I am with the-"
"Corroded Coffin, yeah"
You caught his eyes light up, "Y-You know m-my band?!?"
"Hell, yeah, I do! I like your stuff, it's cool"
He can't believe himself right now, "So, you know my name?"
You laugh at his adorable looking face as he watches you with a dumbfounded expression
You cupped your mouth, "Yes, I do know you, Eddie"
"As the weirdest and the freak, huh?" You noticed his cheeks grew pink, it's so cute that you want pinch it
You click your tongue as you aggressively dismissive your hand at him making him chuckle, "I absolutely do not approve of such statement in my department"
You giggle, "I admire you though for being so selfless, I wish I had that"
Eddie never thought you'd care for a nobody like him, but now, after this interaction he felt like a somebody because someone really sees him
You overheard one of your teachers telling all of the participants to get ready, you looked over his shoulder and saw his bandana hanging from his pants
You had an idea
"Do you mind?" You point at the bandana, Eddie furrows his brows at you as he nods and he removes his bandana from his pants
He gave it to you, Eddie watches you intently as you fold his bandana, he doesn't know what you're doing but he has never been so focused on your looks and he has never seen you this close but damn
He is so entranced by you
The moment you're done with the bandana, you quirk your brow at him for a permission as you raise it aiming at his head and he just shrugs making you chuckle slightly
He feels so hot as he felt your fingertips grazing his scalp and it tingles his heart wickedly
You adjust and secure the knot at the back for good measure and you take a step back to look at your final makeover to him making him so nervous yet again and so bashful under your gaze
You nod in satisfactory for yourself, "So metal"
He beams at you and your compliment as you reached for his hand and you pull him startling for a sec as he immediately intertwined his fingers with you and your heart expands at the touch,
Both of you stopped at the nearest corner of the room that has a mirror on it
"Woah" he moves his head sideways and your grin stays intact as you watch him in the reflection
"See, I told you it will be a nice touch"
"You're far more greater stylist than any of your blood sucking friends"
You stare at him with big wide eyes and he thought he offended you until you bursted out loud cackling as he laughs with you
"Never would've thought that I will be saying this but I fucking agree with you"
He felt how frustrated you are with them, he can tell it by the way you cussed out
"Then why stay?"
Your laughter died down as you smile at him sadly, you sigh, "Well, I'm just like anyone who is new at school trying to be accepted from anyone who has opinions of me and yeah, just your typical social climber, I guess"
He takes your words carefully as he begins to smile, "You don't have to be"
"What?"
"You don't have to do this or that just to fit in, I'd say, let it go and let yourself flow and I think you are already amazing and you don't have to prove anybody else and you let yourself shut off just for other person's sake"
Your mouth open up slightly at his words, you know he is wise but you never thought he had words that are so profoundly true, now, you understand why those kids at school love him
He turns his body to you as he face you completely with a serious look, "Are you happy?"
You frown as you took a deep breath, "N-No, I am not"
"That's your answer"
Your lips curled into a grateful smile, "Thanks, Eddie, you don't know how much your words mean to me, I needed that"
"Don't need to thank me, sweetheart"
Oh, okay, the sweetheart rolls so nicely on his tongue
"I'll get going, see you around, Eddie"
"Sure thing"
Before you leave out at the door, you hurried back as you shout out loud, "And best of luck to your performance! I'm gonna cheer for you or else, I'll wring their necks!"
He snorts at that as he shakes his head and smiles as he exits the room
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So, you came up at the event and wore the puffy red satin strap dress that has petticoat underneath with a sling bag on your shoulder as you carry the heart balloons on the other hand
You did your makeup and hair like you always wanted to do, you smile to yourself as you look down at your creation
You feel good
It's so liberating
You finally felt contented and most importantly
You feel like yourself
Chrissy's mouth hanging agape as she smiles brightly as she looks at you
"She is such a little bitch" Rebecca slams her party cup on the table as she stomps her way to you
The whole class is there, they all given you compliments here and there and you've never been more so happier
You didn't saw her coming as you felt a harsh push on your shoulder almost stumbled you over
"What the fuck are you wearing?!?"
"Have you never seen a dress, Rebecca?"
"Are you jealous? because she can wear it better than you?"
You bite your bottom lip as you stop the laugh erupting from your mouth as you heard Robin's voice out of nowhere, causing the whole crowd to react
Nancy elbows Robin as she also laughs at her as well
Eddie is headed at the kitchen to pour himself a drink but abruptly stops at the commotion in the living room when he saw you there, wow is all he can think of right now
The cherry lips looks so enticing and inviting on you, he nod to himself, you've listened to his words and you took his advice that he never thought you would do but you just did
Yeah, he's mind is going blank the longer he stares at you
"Who the fuck said that?!?" Rebecca exclaims
"Here's the balloons that you're asking for me to bring" you hand it out to Chrissy as she gingerly took it
You turn your back around her but before she could lay a hand at you
You dodge it as you step aside making her lose her balance as she fall face flat in the floor making everyone in the room, boomed with laughter
"Ouch, that's gotta hurt" you tease with a smirk on your face
She grunts and grumbles, "Shut the fuck up!"
"Hey, I'm not done talking to you!"
"I think we are done-"
"You are not welcome-"
"Guess what, Rebecca, I don't give a shit about your self-proclaimed righteousness clique bullshit"
You lean down as she moved backward as you caught her faltered at her bratty attitude hinting that you are dead serious to your point, you got her right under your claws
You grinned, "You might be not so feisty anymore, huh"
"It's official, y'all, I'm balling out-"
"But I made you!" She tantrums like a toddler
You laugh in disbelief at her behavior
How fucking pathetic this is
"Well, it turns out highschool isn't about based on whether you are popular or not, it's about being a state of mind, I am choosing for myself now"
"Me too!" Chrissy snakes her arm onto yours as you beam at her
"No- you-" she grab a hold to her calf but she yanks it freely
"I am fed up, Rebecca! Don't make me tell everyone how you're so abusive to us, making us what to drink and what to eat, I am sick of it!"
A loud audible gasp fell at everyone's mouths
That's where it fell apart for Rebecca, the shell has been broken and it's clear, the real her squeaked as she ran towards the door out of embarrassment and ashamed
You and Chrissy chuckled at each other as you got a glimpse of Robin and Nancy raising their cups to you as you nod at them
"We're having a party, don't we?!?" You announced
After a beat of silence, everyone cheered and the music started playing
You said to Chrissy you will be out for a minute as she lets you to it
The moment you closed the door behind you at the backyard, the heavy feeling is now gone out of you
You can breathe easily now unlike before
You sat down at one of the pavements at the small stairs towards the pool
The sounds of chains jingling as you turn your head around who is approaching to your silent peace celebration of victory
He appears in his usual style, but except for he's wearing a maroon polo, (you don't see him wearing any like that before) a few buttons open at his chest revealing his silver of skin, ripped black jeans and belt chains
As always his favorite black boots, you felt thrilled to see him again
"Oh hi, Eddie"
"Hey"
He's holding a heart balloon which he offers to tie it around your wrist as you let him
You both hold eye contact at each other as he moves your bangs that it's poking your eye as you blush at his gesture
Does he have any idea of what he's doing to you?!?
You scoot as you offer him a seat next to you as he gladly accepts it with a smile
"I saw what you did back there"
You chuckle, "I'm sorry for stealing your moves"
"My moves?"
"I only did what you always do at the cafeteria"
"Oh that" he laughs "Y-Yeah, I always just speak up and standing for what it's right-"
"Exactly, I've always loved at how you preach"
He sheepishly smiles as you can see how deep his dimples are, you're fighting every bone in your body not to squeeze his cheeks right there and then
"Say, um- c-can you join me?"
You act dumbly, "On what?" but you know damn well what he's implying
Fuck, focus, Eddie
"Me, just me"
"You?"
"Y-Yeah, the two of us"
"Together?"
"A-a date" he blurt out and gauging himself at your processing expression
Your eyes sparkled and Eddie's chest is about to blast off at the proximity that you moved even closer to him
He can breathe the living days out of you and he can't stop smiling at your reaction
"I thought you'd never ask"
"Wait, what-"
You quickly peck at his lips as he swallowed hard and his cheeks turns bright red as you giggle at the transfer of your lipstick to his
He is frozen as a rock but his brain electrocuted to wake him up
He cups your cheeks as he leaps and gives you the most leg wobbling kiss that you ever gotten in your life
You dive deeper as his hands flies to hold your waist tightly as your freehand goes to his neck as you place your hand on his chest
You both breath heavily as you both cackled of your lipstick being smeared at your faces
You take a wet wipe to clean his face as he did yours gently, avoiding not to remove your makeup
"What would Rebecca thought about you and me together?"
"Why should I care? When I already love him the way he truly is"
He looks at you as he reads you carefully, no trace of uncertainty just pure genuine care and love for him
He slowly smiles as kisses your cheek as you sigh in content
You heard "Hey Lover by The Daughters of Eve" started playing at the party
"Eddie, that's our theme song!"
He follows your line of sight as he listens, you begin to sing a long to it, he finally got the meaning of it
"Hey, hey, lover, you don't have to be a star, hey, hey lover, I love you just the way you are"
He chuckles as he watches you, "I love you too, sweetheart"
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a/n : let's pretend this is a very late valentine's gift to all of you but nonetheless, I made it! I had this idea for so long but I found the right song to relate the story that I had in mind! :))
please don't forget to like, comment and share! I will be so appreciative if you did all three and thank you so much of your support and take care! 🥺🫶🏻✨
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universalthaumaturge · 28 days ago
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so. chapter 5 huh.
#hunter the parenting#ramblings abound:#i think this was the first time in a long while i've actively. “geeked out”? over something?#don't really like that term but i *did* just sit there emitting various noises awestruckedly. and i don't tend to do that?#certainly been years since i reached a point where the only thoughts i could muster were ''this is so FUCKING COOL'' and such#ok anywase. thoughts. so:#the purple text “just cause you can dont mean you should” guy is jambles in the credits right. havent seen anyone talk about that yet#fuckin hell. brok character arc possibly incoming. who'da thunk it!#(i'da thunk it there are NO two-dimensional characters in this series (except when they're 2d-animated but i digress))#D's eyes flashing gold???? it might be non-diagetic but like. cmon. of course he's got something going on.#also what's going on with grimal and elise. what is going on with them. hey. hey what is going on. theyre still exceedingly suspicious. hey#matilda...#alright spoiler territory: is the tree arm white moth gift a thing#someone said the umbra looked wyrmy. is she... is she a black spiral dancer?#its been a couple months since i've done a wod loredive so i might be a tad rusty.#also. love how we can see her channeling rage before going glabro#and her crinos..... with that shadow over her face and her eyes glowing............... must admit i am Infatuated. badly. huh who said that#god the whole build up the whole reveal the whole fight the whole aftermath it's all just. so fucking good.#solar sorcery occam mural was great#“god” saying fatigue instead of fatigue was great#git???? lost a fucking arm????? is grimal ok???????????#seems like no one died but like. theres def gonna be a hopital scenes.#so wait was spit really just out of ritalin...?#god the fucking. canon ads. NO ONE is doing it like ogre poppenang#brok drank a molotov btw??? almost forgot about that#hang on. does marckus still have the oculus. marckulus. thats for sure gonna be plot relevant right#the fucking. ''cant wait for the audiolog where marckus annoys matilda with questions in their umbra trip'' in the comments section. amazin#amanda... shes getting a raise right. god i hope they don't push matilda's work on her. it *would* be funny but PLEASE she needs a BREAK#wait matilda is full-on garou and her surname is Wilde. probably a pseudonym which makes it even fucking funnier. she did it on purpose
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oathkeeper-of-tarth · 1 year ago
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Also I quit my job of what would in about a month or two have been 10 years, and perhaps now I will get to actually be a human being again.
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includedisco · 4 months ago
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This must be my shortest comeback ever as a fanfic writer
Fist episode of a show I've waited "years" for finally aired yesterday. Episode one was great and let me tell you it gave me inspiration and motivation to write. I was so excited, buzzing with energy and bursting with ideas. This thing darn broke me out of my writing hiatus is the shortest time ever😃🙌
Until...😒 I jotted down a few lines for each of the three ideas in my head. By few lines I mean maybe 4 each but just that alone I felt like my sanity was exiting my body. 45 minutes later, I'm back on hiatus😅 yep that's the writing we all love. The mood is one fickle b***h. Until next time when the mood strikes again on 29th February🙄✌️
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feral-ass-raccoon · 4 months ago
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why are all these posts acting like US queers are dead. like i love the positivity[?] but we aren't. we aren't dead. guys. we're fucking spiteful you really think we're going down that easily??? i kid you not i saw a post that went like "we mourn your deaths but stay strong" like bestie??????? "bring out your dead" "I'M NOT DEAD YET" fuckin scenario
no i don't know a whole lot abt the situation but i 1000% wanna check in so if any body has articles abt both side pleaseeeeee sharee 👉👈 looking at you @santaclaushohoho1
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bell-swamp-fitzjames · 5 days ago
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mcdonald goodsir talking scene but its like an hour bc i just would like to see them talk more
#oh fics i must write things i must think#not to imply im not giving my two current fics my all i just am doing varying degrees of brain power on writing#i want to do a refresh on my one college gothic course bc i'm going to be doing ghosts in my next#multichapter fic where idk if this will change talk about things i need to pin down but#i think it will be collins crozier and eventually tozer who are able to see ghosts and they exist but i'm#going to be keeping it where generally ppl don't think this is real at all slash like#idk the spiritualism movement etc is like our real world but the thing is ghsots REALLY DO exist i guess osrt of just furthering#the yes and of tunnbaq actually eating these guys souls#but i also dont know what else im changing bc like rn its just like ok everything the same but i get to describe how to certain characters#its MUCH worse actually like imagine tozer seeing irving in camp only for him to later see his body being brought back idk#i think im gonna combo i tmaybe with the one wild thing i started back when venus in furs had me GOT#where tozer makes his own mutiny but ugh we shall see#i'm considering letting manson also see ghosts idk man i know this fic cant to everything but im also like#oh tee hee i can write morfin and collins and oh tom hartnell is here and of course tozer#and then new we are also saying fuck it and adding crozier which opens#lots of things#ENSEMBLE CAST CURSE YOU like looove this show but why are there so many guys#if i want to write a sick and cool fic i have to think about too many guys and then i shoot myself in the foot by going#yeah ok..... and what if we explored so much in this one thing#says the guy who also has to go through hoops to write terror fic sorry i forget my roots#i act like i didnt fucking make fictional show mickey's sister the same as his real life one and made her a lesbain in high school#LIKE MY BROTHER IN CHRIST it doesnt matter#i guess its just bc i worry i dont get these guys and again theres too many of them#like what if i write c#well they are all fictional#anyways i shouldn't put in the tags so much if you read this im giving u a kiss
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theflyingfeeling · 26 days ago
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local cry-baby complains about her sad little life and self-created problems again, pt 325
#i keep seeing ads for summer festivals and feeling sad because of no blind channel in them#sad because i miss them yes but also sad because if there's no BC it means i'm not going to music festivals next summer#as there's no other finnish band or artist that i care enough about to travel around the country for and pay those expensive tickets for#and none of the non-finnish bands or artists that i like ever come to finland#except for alvaro soler who has a gig in tampere#but it's at this festival for middle-aged people lol and i'm not sure i wanna go there alone#yes i can and likely will do it alone if i must. i actually have no problem doing things alone. i have done things like this alone before#but some things are just more fun NOT done alone ya know#and so. if i'm not going to music festivals i'm probably gonna do fuck all next summer#and that's just gonna be sooooo much fun 🙃 the brain absolutely loves that 🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃#my local music festival is gonna have max. 3 artists that i'd like to see. all performing on different days of course#and i don't like summer music festivals _that_ much that i'd pay for a 3-day ticket just for one artist per day#in fact summer festivals are pretty terrible lol there are so many people there and so many of them are drunk or otherwise annoying#and again i'd be going alone which only adds to the terribleness of the experience#BC was the only exception for me 😭#i would travel to another city and pay for an expensive ticket and tolerate all the terribleness of summer festivals#because i knew that the 50-60 minutes i'd get to spend with my boys (and my friends) would be worth it#and omg yes i understand how incredibly privileged i am for having been able to do so in the past summers#ultimately this rant is not (just) about blind channel
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goatsandgangsters · 11 months ago
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jfc salt in the fucking wound
SO I FINALLY, AFTER FOUR YEARS, TESTED POSITIVE FOR COVID
would you like to know. the ONLY place I have gone in the entire last week. the only place?
hauling up to boston to go to my job :))) that I am leaving :)))) because of how often they make me commute to boston :))))))) the job that I just gave my two weeks notice at on monday :))))))))
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shiryawashere · 2 months ago
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you ever miss your comfort character so bad you gotta go outside about it
#idk i've been pretty stressed that's probably why i randomly got rly sad abt it#and by it i mean the uh. gestures vaguely at fandom i guess#either nobody's there or it feels like i'm not exactly welcome. or both! which tough shit i'mma take up the space regardless but like#this weird sense of elitism I get in a space that's built by and nurtured by people whose MO is 'caring a lot' is.. hm.. interesting#idk just got reminded this morning that some people view critique as a free pass to drag a creator through the mud#when what you SHOULD be doing is uplifting them so that they can improve and reach their maximum potential. you clown. you absolute buffoon#it wasn't targeted at me or anything it just made me so angry/sad. smad. i'm smad about it#i just get hit with a wave of what's the point. what's the fucking point nobody cares abt things made with passion for the love of the game#we don't have time/it's not good enough/it doesn't matter/it's been done better/why x when we have y#and you know what fair enough everyone's entitled to their own emotional responses of course.#if you think your opinion is reason enough to tear it down then we're gonna have to agree to disagree on that one i think#just keep in mind that you could have loved what they made. other people could have loved it. it could have changed something for someone.#i personally know artists and have worked with artists who have put so so much effort into making something work over and over and over#only to have no audience and get back up saying guys let's give this just one more try.#hell back in the day I was an accomplished writer kid who was told that you may be good but nobody gives a fuck#artists who use up all these resources just to bring something new into the world and nobody's looking. what's the point. what's the point#anyway. i'm gonna go wade through the snow for a bit maybe sink my bare hands into it you guys want anything#started the post thinkin abt my blorbos ending it crying putting my shoes on alright I'm going I'm GETTING the FRESH AIR fuck off#i'll be god once i've gotten a bottle of coke and some mozzarella sticks. wait am i pmsing. fuck#god i hate that i don't drink sometimes.
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punkrockisafulltimejob · 5 months ago
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I'm working on a project on my computer and vaping, this is the closest I've been to my normal pain level in days. I know it won't last, especially not when I'm trying to sleep later.
Trying to ignore the guilt of disappearing from work for three days, when the last time I did that it was my mental breakdown two years ago.
#it's not like then#not really#I mean it is and it isn't#my physical health was/is in a point of decline and the fear of pushing myself too hard became/is becoming too much#but I've grown so much in the last two years#I'm not gonna lie#sometimes I wish I had quit the work force back then#I obviously couldn't have predicted the sharp decline of my physical health over the course of this calendar year#but it happened#so the day to day question becomes now what?#now what do I do with myself/my life/my time/my energy/my independence/my god knows what else#nothing I am physically capable of doing is going to fulfill me and the things that fulfill me are now out of reach#so what fucking now?#I think this is it folks#I think it's time to start planning my exit strategy from the work force#and I don't know how the fuck I'm gonna do that when we literally just bought a condo#and I have therapy tomorrow too so I get to try and relay all this to my therapist in just half an hour lol#I don't regret dropping down to maintenance sessions#but sometimes you just need more time#tomorrow I'll get on the phone and be like ohmygodjoshitsbeensuchafuckingweek#ihadaflareupsobadicalledoutofatotaloffourdaysofworkandleftearlybythreehoursoneday#andnowimhavingcompletefearsaboutbeingsocompletelyincapacitatedthatillneverleavethehouseagain#and he'll be like well first of all BREATHE#second of all there's nothing indicating that this is unlike every other flare up that you've managed to fight through after a week plus#and then I'll be like butwhatifimstuckhomewithkaren24/7andshedrivesmebatshitwhenicantleaveonmyown?#and then he'll be like what did I just say about breathing?#but then he'll point out that the point of us moving is so we can get more space and be able to separate ourselves from her more#and then I'll cycle back to but she won't see reason and take the downstairs bedroom now instead of god knows how long down the line#trust me we do this every two weeks lol
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itzphynix · 8 months ago
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Gender is happening to me.
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bitegore · 10 months ago
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hands on the mirror staring into my own eyes repeating 'we do not play defense' to myself until i stop trying to play defense on shit no one is even trying to dig at
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naomiknight-17 · 11 months ago
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Sitting in a waiting room with Mom cuz she has a doc's appointment
There's a sign on the door saying masks are STRONGLY encouraged
Only Mom and I are wearing masks
There are over a dozen people waiting
The fact that I haven't massacred the whole room is a testament to my incredible self-control
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an-aura-about-you · 1 year ago
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sometimes the best thing about a day of work is that it's over.
#work whinging in the tags#a coworker was out today and will be out on Monday as well#Monday it won't be as bad but today it sucked because this week's the week I do my day team's banks#I don't bother telling my night team this because every time I did before it didn't made any difference#I busted my ass working on the early banks getting them as done as I could#but of course I still get one bank like 6 minutes before my break and it's got a query that requires me to look at 500 items#so naturally I'm late to my break but fuck y'all I AM gonna take my entire break#so of course by the time I get back I already had a bank waiting for me#and I couldn't keep on top of some of my day team's bank work because of it#one of my day team banks ended up taking like an hour between doing that work a 1200 item query & working 4 other banks on the side#and THEN the person who hands out banks forgot to assign one to me until I had already clocked out#for the record they got the bank about 20 minutes before I was scheduled to clock out they had plenty of time to do it#and then I said that I can do it but it was going to be overtime at this point#and they said 'that's okay' so I took that to mean I was supposed to do it#so I said 'ok I'm working on it now'#only for them to ask 'are you working on the bank?'#like yes???? I literally just said I was??????#and that's when I realized that they possibly meant 'that's okay' as 'don't worry about it you can go for the night'#but if that's what they meant THEY SHOULDN'T HAVE USED A PHRASE AS AMBIGUOUS AS 'THAT'S OKAY'
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metanarrates · 2 years ago
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basically: not using the aromantic label cause I don’t think it’s crazy applicable to my life (i feel like my weird relationship to romance is more easily chalked up to me being autistic polyam and a lesbian) but I believe in their beliefs
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