#I can’t do anything without a recipe it scary

[ah0yh0y]

Craving food but not what’s in the house or like I don’t have to make it

I just want someone to cook with me

[hades-in-bloom]

Al Dente

Leon S. Kennedy x Reader

summary: he might be of Italian descent, but he still can’t nail cooking pasta.

warnings & contents: assumed older Leon, but could be of any period; assumed age gap, but could be none; reader could be of any gender; fluff with attitude and smth that could be considered a prelude with grabbing and kisses; mentions of drinking; no pasta recipes, really, just stupid banter; a little bit of manhandling

a/n: am not Italian, so please let me know if I’ve committed any blasphemy. Also, this is one silly piece of writing because I’m de-stressing and can’t write anything serious, but am also obsessed with Leon tapping into his Italian descent. As always, proceed with caution and at your own risk. Minors DNI! Masterlist xoxo

***

‘Oh, I swear…’ Leon mumbled, taking a look into the deep cylindrical pot that was cooking on the stove; the water boiling merrily. Kennedy sighed; he got distracted for a few minutes while taking a call from D.S.O.—which seemed enough for a batch of pasta to turn into goo.

Again.

Leon huffed out a bad word, lifted the pot from the heat, and dropped it straight into the sink without any attempt to retrieve its doughy contents. The man cracked open another beer bottle and took a sip, visibly consumed with heavy thoughts; the number of beers had perfectly correlated with the number of unsuccessfully cooked batches of pasta. Although Leon has never encouraged food waste, this time the big and scary D.S.O. agent refused to give up, steadily losing his sobriety with each try.

You watched him suffer for quite a while, half through the bottle of wine yourself—because grabbing popcorn would be too obvious and undoubtedly rude, although the show was getting more entertaining by the minute; Leon’s frustration was evident.

‘How’s it going?’ you hummed from behind his back. You did your best to hide your smirk.

Leon groaned. He knew you were having a laugh; who wouldn't in that situation, anyway.

‘I’d rather shoot a horde of zombies,’ Kennedy mumbled. He took another sip of his beer and hummed, assessing the situation. ‘Also, I'm running out of pasta.’

You were convinced he deserved the roast; however, his genuinely concerned facial expression made you chuckle.

‘Should we take a break?’ you tilted your head slightly, watching his reaction.

‘We?’ Leon raised his eyebrow, giving you a side-eye. ‘I am getting tortured. What exactly are you doing?’

You thought about it briefly; took a sip from your wine glass.

‘I guess I should be qualified as moral support?’ you assumed.

Leon scoffed, then couldn’t hold back a chuckle. He turned around, facing you; his eyes trained on your features then.

‘I bet you don’t know how to cook a proper al dente either.’

‘You bet?’ wine was your liquid courage, so you might have been too venturesome at that moment. Neither of you complained, though. The man of the hour was intrigued. ‘What if I were to cook you the nicest al dente pasta you’ve ever eaten, Kennedy?’

Scott snorted in a friendly manner and folded his arms over his chest.

‘Ever eaten is a bold claim, sweetheart,’ he teased, his smile growing wider. ‘My family were immigrants from Italy, you know that, right?’

You shrugged his comment off light-heartedly.

‘If I lose, I lose, right? And you could claim your prize,’ you smirked. Oh, you had no doubts he was interested.

His gaze bore into yours for a second; then his features relaxed, although you still could see his shoulders tense—you let it slip.

‘Alright, go forth and forward,’ he smirked; his stare spoke volumes. ‘I will start thinking of what you owe me in return when you screw it up.’

You quickly cleaned up the kitchen countertop, allowing clean water to boil one more in the cooking pot while you measured two portions of store-bought pasta.

Leon watched your actions over your shoulder before you felt his large palms on your hips.

‘Nicely done,’ he murmured from under your earlobe.

You knew he wouldn't be able to play fair; he wasn't big on losing, whether major or minor—and you cooking pasta al dente better than him, taking into account his heritage, was a below-the-belt insult to him. Thus, he didn't mind deploying desperate measures.

‘That’s cheating, Kennedy,’ you muttered, putting the batch of pasta into the pot.

‘I don't remember me touching you being against whatever rules,’ he hummed, placing his lips on your neck. Your heartbeat fastened. ‘Fairly, I don't remember us discussing any rules.’

‘You’ll regret it when I win,’ you claimed. Leon glanced into your pot once again. ‘A couple of minutes more…’ You hummed.

‘How do you know the perfect timing?’ he moaned into your ear. You smirked.

‘Who knows, maybe it would be awful…’ you teased, and he shook his head.

‘No, it won’t,’ Leon concluded quickly and, by lifting you up, grabbed you onto his shoulder. You squealed, losing the ground from under your feet, and clung onto his t-shirt from the back in an attempt to keep your balance.

‘Oh, you fiend!’ you watched him turn off the stove before dragging you into the bedroom. ‘That was our dinner!’

‘I think you're right—we should take a break; maybe, we could order pizza…’ he hummed. You groaned in response, helplessly hanging from his height, his hand holding you tight right under your asscheeks.

Leon let you slide from his shoulder onto the mattress in the bedroom, hovering over you in the next second. His lips barely touched yours when he smirked and watched you blush then.

‘…after I finish with the appetizer.’

[lxstfathier]

Cachorrita

Los Vaqueros x Reader

Headcanons

Summary: you got caught in the middle of the narco violence, losing everything. Thankfully, the vaqueros rescued you and decided to adopt you… as a pet.

Warnings: murder/trauma mentions, pet play, collaring, poly relationship (?), slight smut.

A/N: i can’t stop thinking about Ale and Rudy, they’re both so cute and boyfriend shaped and i love them very much 💗 so i got this silly idea in the middle of the night and decided to write it, don’t ask me what the hell is this, just enjoy it. And please remember that english is not my first language. Hope y’all like it :)

♡ Your parents were killed by el sin nombre, and you were kidnapped for a few days with the intention of human trafficking. Luckily, you were rescued by los vaqueros before you ended up being trafficked for real.

♡ It was nice to be free again, but everything you had ever know didn’t exist anymore. Not even your home. You had nowhere to go, and such a naive little girl like you would be an easy target in Las Almas… again. That’s why the vaqueros offered you to stay with them, in their base.

♡ You accepted immediately. They saved your life, and you would trust them with it.

♡ At first, it was weird to live among military men. Seeing them always with a serious look on their faces and yelling orders was quite scary, but soon you got used to it. You got along with everyone, and they all treated you in the nicest way possible, so it wasn’t as bad as you thought.

♡ They even gave you your own little room!

♡ Once you started to get more comfortable, you gained the confidence to get out of your room more often, exploring the base and helping around with the daily tasks, learning the basic things. And it wasn’t long until you grew closer to Alejandro and Rodolfo, following them around any time you could.

♡ Alejandro thinks of you as one of those stray dogs that Rudy used to bring into the base (in a cute way), that’s why they started calling you “Cachorrita”.

♡ You love the nickname, but you loved it even more when they actually started treating you as a puppy, making sure that you’re always happy and taken care of.

♡ One day, they surprise you with a pretty collar. It’s made from the softest and most finest leather, in your favorite color, and it also has a cute heart-shaped tag that says “Cachorrita” and “Propiedad de Los Vaqueros” in the back. Such a sweet gift. It made you teary. You hugged every single one of them as a thank you and then Alejandro put it around your neck <3

♡ It doesn’t matter if they’re all at the base, or just a few soldiers, you always go out to spend time with them. You keep them company, listen to anything they have to say, comfort them, or just snuggle on their lap while they play with your hair. They say often that you’re way better than a therapy dog, but you don’t really think so.

♡ One time you decided it would be a great idea to cook something for them, so you prepared chilaquiles con carne, and they all went insane, saying that it was delicious, better than the bland military food they were used to eat daily. So now you cook for them almost every day, remembering the recipes your mother taught you.

♡ Even though they all agreed to collar you, only Alejandro is allowed to put a leash on you. He doesn’t do it often, just when he has to do a lot of paperwork in his office, taking you with him to keep you at his feet for hours. “Good girl” he says petting your head while you rest your chin on his thigh. “Keep being obedient and i’ll give you a treat when i’m done”. If he gets stressed, he might use that pretty little mouth of yours.

♡ They won’t hesitate to spoil you. You want new clothes? Stuffed animals? Jewelry? The newest iphone? don’t even worry about it, Ale and Rudy will be buying it all for you.

♡ When they go away on missions, they always text you whenever they can, making sure that you’re fine without them. Rudy always gives you one of his credit cards, telling you to use it if you need something. But you have never used it, you have everything you need at the base.

♡ When they come back, the first thing you hear is Alejandro yelling “Dónde está nuestra cachorrita?”, and you’ll come out of your room as fast as you can, running to them to hug them tight, glad that they’re all safe and sound.

♡ Sometimes, when Alejandro or Rodolfo get horny (which is often), they come to you, and you spread your legs for them, happy to please them however they want. Rudy fucks you sweet and slow. Alejandro fucks you fast and rough. But you like it more when they both fuck you at the same time.

♡ When you get your period, they all treat you as if you were dying, giving you everything you want and need. Alejandro makes sure you have pain pills and a hot water bottle to put on your tummy, and Rudy goes to the store to get more pads and your favorite snacks.

♡ When you wake up in the middle of the night because of your constant nightmares, you sneak into Rudy’s room, getting in the bed with him and cuddling up in his chest. “Qué pasa, cachorrita? you got nightmares again?” he asks, half awake, and when you whisper a “si” he just holds you closer, hearing his heart beat until you fall asleep.

♡ They teach you how to use a gun, just in case. But you really hate it. Those things are heavy and loud and scary.

♡ Speaking of things you hate, you also don’t like going outside due to your trauma. But Alejandro and Rudy insist on taking you out at least once a week, going to the local market for some groceries, and you hold Ale’s hand as if your life depended on it, way too scared to let him go. But, if you behave well, they buy you ice cream on the way back.

♡ You’re not a brat, but sometimes you accidentally do something they don’t like. They’re the military after all, highly disciplined men, and you aren’t used to that. If you do something slightly disrespectful or don’t listen to orders, it will result on Rudy or Ale yanking you by the collar, planting a firm smack on your ass. “Don’t do that again, entendido?”.

♡ You love stealing Ale’s military jackets. They’re comfy, oversized and smell like him. But you didn’t expected him to get you your own jacket, embroidered with “cachorrita” on the front and a bright pink armband that says “emotional support”. And you love it, of course, but that doesn’t stop you from stealing his jackets again.

♡ You have an oral fixation, and Rudy thrives off it, letting you bite his arms, lick his neck or have a really messy and heated up kissing session (if he’s not busy). Sometimes he even lets you suck his fingers, but be careful with that one cuz he might want to give you something bigger to suck on.

♡ If any of Los Vaqueros gets hurt on a mission or training, you will take care of them just like they do with you, not leaving their side until they feel better. You can’t stand seeing any of your -new found- family in pain, makes you feel sad :(

♡ When your birthday comes, Alejandro and Rodolfo enter your room early at morning, singing las mañanitas and giving you the gift they got for you. It’s exciting, so you quickly open the box, eager to see what’s inside. Gasping when you finally admire the pretty set of fluffy ears, tail plug, and thigh high socks with paw print, all in your favorite color. “Why don’t you try it on for us, cachorrita?” Alejandro suggests, and you’re more than happy to do so, already feeling a tingle between your legs.

♡ You’re on birth control, obviously, but Rudy and Ale are already thinking about getting you off those stupid pills…

[courtofmatchups]

Hello! I stumbled across your page and I love it so much! I was wondering if you could match me with a character from Obey Me.

Pronouns: She/Her

Zodiac Sign: Pisces

Personality to lovers: Lovey dovey, affectionate, cuddling, willing to listen an/or just sit in silence with them to spend time together. Loves kisses

Personality to everyone in general: Very polite, kind, listens wholeheartedly, is often sought out by other to give advice. Loves giving hugs

Likes: Water (drinking water and being in bodies of water), sleeping, playing video games, watching tv, reading, trying out new recipes. Hanging out with friends and family. Will try just about anything once.

Dislikes: excessively scary and horror things, gore (I can be a scardy cat)

Fav foods: Chicken, non dairy ice cream, tea(all kinds of tea) alcoholic beverages (I like trying them to see how they taste), WATER(I can’t go without it).

Least Fav Foods: anything I’m allergic to (seafood, mushrooms, dairy)

Also I am a very creative individual I like to paint, edit photos build things small house restoration projects.

It seems to me you've captured the heart of...

The Gluttonous Sixth Born

Beelzebub!

I saw that you enjoyed trying out new recipes and KNEW that Beel would be the perfect match for you. Your personality is compatible with his too. Beel is super affectionate, so expect lots of hugs. And sitting in silence with you would be something he'd like to do with you. Your presence is calming to him.

Beel also appreciates how you treat people. Especially since his brothers would trust you so implicitly. You give out really good advice, and that to me seems like a big indicator of a great personality.

Beel would want to try new things with you, since you have mentioned you enjoying doing that. He already does much of the activities you enjoy with his brothers, but doing them with you would be even more special to him. I think he would also like whatever you create: edited photos, paintings, whatever. And in the event you have to do a home renovation project, he's gonna help. He's super strong so that would be a huge advantage.

But his all time favourite thing to do with you would be to try different foods with you. Well, the ones you aren't allergic to, of course.

In conlclusion, I see a very happy relationship between the two of you

[lunarsun12]

Jay Parenting Dilemma

Masterlist

After a week babysitting, Jay kids. Heesung has enough of their behaviours. First he got pushed by Sunghoon as he claims the bathroom first. Then Sunoo literally tried to rob him! Luckily Jake was there to stop him.

Heesung decided to make a bet with Jay. If he can actually control his kids, then he will be Jay chauffeur.

Will Heesung be Jay chauffeur?

Back At Enhypen Chat

Today 16:00

Niki🕺: Who took Sunoo and Sunghoon soul?

Jake🐶: Same question, those two are being so nice. Sunoo didn’t call Lyla a furr ball

Niki🕺: Sunoo even complimented Sunghoon his hair. And the scary part, I saw them giving eachother a hug

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: Your Uncle Jay has been strangely responsible. He made Sunoo say sorry to Sunghoon for stealing his clothes

The day before the strange behaviour

Back At Heesung and Jay Chat

Today 1:00am

Jay🦊: HYUNG! Why did you call me! It is 1am!!

Heeseung🦌: You wouldn’t answer if I texted you so calling you is the best answer

Heesung🦌: We need to have talk about your kids!

Jay🦊: They are fine! Mind your own business! Look how angelic they are

Heesung🦌: I wish…I don’t have to intervene BUT when it was my turn to babysit the kids. They almost turned against me when I said no when they asked for more money!!

Jay🦊: They love the hustle and bustle. What’s the problem?

Heesung🦌: Name one time, there hasn’t been a problem with them?

Jay🦊: Hmmm, it’s late! My brain is not working right now

Heesung🦌: Hah! I bet you can’t go a week making the behave. Without having me and Jungwon to intervene

Jay🦊: Is this a challenge? I show I am always responsible. When I win, you will to be my chauffeur

Heesung🦌: Hah, that is never going to happen. Good luck making them behave

Present day (Day 6) …

Back At Enhypen Chat

Heesung🦌: I wonder how Jay is holding up?

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: He is doing fine…actually. He is making them his 3 hours curry

Niki🕺: Eomma can we come over! I want to try his famous curry recipe

Jake🐶: Us too!!

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: This is suspicious! I have the police on speed dial. No one come near Jay house tonight

Sunoo☀️: Good Evening fellow family!

Sunghoon❄️: Today is the best day! Appa finally told Sunoo off. He immediately started to be beareable

Sunoo☀️: Appa, finally stopped showing favouritism to Sunghoon. Naturally I will be nice

Niki🕺: This gotta be a joke…

Sunoo☀️: NIKI! WHEN YOU ARE COMING OVER! I MISSED YOU!!

Niki🕺: You guys are seeing this..

Jake🐶: SOMEONE FIX THEM OR ARE WE IN A PARALLEL UNIVERSE

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: Could get your Appa to come. We have some questions

Heesung🦌: Drats, Jay is taking it seriously. I gotta do something fast before I really become a chauffeur

Jay🦊: Hey guys! What’s up? Who knew parenting is so hard. Thanks Sunghoon for helping!

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: You okay hyung? You actually sorting your family out?

Jay🦊: It’s time for me to change my attitude! I have forgotten how cute my kids are

Niki🕺: Something is wrong you…YOU NEVER COMPLIMENTED THEM LIKE EVER

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: Sunoo and Sunghoon is your Appa making you act

Sunghoon❄️: I don’t act. That’s sunoo job, he actually sorted the bathroom fight this morning and gave us a hug

Sunoo☀️: Appa is the best!

3hours later…

Jay🦊: YOU BRATS! HOW DARE YOU RUIN MY CURRY. YOU BOTH HAVE ONE JOB!!

Sunoo☀️: We didn’t do anything….

Jay🦊: That’s it! THIS IS THE THANKS I GET FOR BEING NICE. I WILL CONTINUE MY OWN WAY!! Heesung Hyung is a liar!!

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: Hold on hold on! How about you continue this new leaf. What about you said calling them cute

Jay🦊: Cute my butt! They are little demons! This is coming out both of your pocket money!

Sunoo☀️: THIS IS NOT FAIR! IT WASN’T US!!

Jake🐶: Has anyone seen Appa? He has been missing for some time…

Jungwon🐈‍⬛: Awww you miss your Appa? He said he is going on a run, don’t he will be home soon

Sunghoon❄️: This didn’t last long! Sunoo can be so annoying..

Sunoo☀️: YOU NOT INNOCENT EITHER!!

Jay🦊: Why did I even adopted kids! I just can’t win!!

30mins later…

Heesung🦌: I’m so glad, I put a stop to this. I can’t be Jay chauffeur my rep

[thesiblingsoftheblackandwhite]

Tinky sighs, closing his eyes in hopes of resting them for a moment. He shifts his position. The pullout creaks under him. The stove has been off and it’s too dark out, they should all be asleep.

Karaxis?

A tad annoyed, he breathes in, opens his eyes, and swivels his head to the hallway. Blinky waits at the spot just before the foyer entrance. Tinky expects some sort of response, but doesn’t get one. Widely confused, he opens his mouth to ask.

Can you read to me?

They stare at each other. T’noy blinks. Bliklotep makes a strange face before smoothing it out as best he can. He visibly squirms in place. Tinky tilts his head, eventually setting his expression into a little smirk as he leans forward.

Oh, I see. The Watcher wants another bedtime story? Don’t you know all of them by now?

Thank them Blinky is able to catch the teasing tone. He relaxes as Tinky gets off the couch to look through their pile of books. He gestures for him to sit. Tinky frowns at their selection.

There’s not a lot of stories, unless you wanna fall asleep to cookbook recipes.

He chuckles, hoping to get a similar reaction. But Blinky doesn’t respond, lightly kicking his legs out from where they hang.

You know there’s no point if I pick for you.

Bliklotep kicks his shoes off to hug his knees.

…I really messed up today.

Tinky sighs, foregoing his search and climbing onto the couch.

Wiggly’s going to forgive you. Other than that, I can’t think of anything else you did wrong.

Blinky squeezes his legs tighter. That hadn’t been what he’d meant.

…Do you want me to make something up again?

Bliklotep liked that word. Again. As if the last time they had done this was no more than two days ago. He nods. Tinky hums in response and crosses his legs.

C’mere.

He holds out his arms as if expecting a hug. Blinky watches him and slowly uncurls. He crawls closer to T’noy with a neutral face and rests his head on his thigh. He waits there, unblinking, as Tinky starts carding his fingers through his hair.

OK, timelines…timelines…

He tries to come up with a suitable story.

Oh! Remember that timeline where Hidgens finally got his dumb musical accepted, and then he killed everyone in the cast and almost the whole audience-

Blinky tenses. His hand grips the sheets tighter as his body’s discomfort increases.

Tinky. Nothing scary.

The story stops.

…I’m not sick, T’noy.

The hand leaves his forehead.

Just checking.

Tinky keeps running a hand over his hair. The noise is nice.

…OK. Did you like the one about the dinosaurs?

Blinky hums tiredly, yanking his eyes open the second they close.

Dinosaurs…yeah…

Tinky never got why that was one of his favorites. Bliklotep had been around for it, after all. It wasn’t unknown. He starts the story anyway. Not the meteor part. His little brother had said no violent stories tonight. But everything before was just fine.

…Herbivores like sauropods and iguanodons would eat plants that were around the Earth, or underwater…

Eventually, he stops when Blinky’s breathing doesn’t change. Karaxis looks down to find his brother’s eyes wide open and slightly shaking. He knows it’s not from a lack of exhaustion.

Bliklotep. Close your eyes.

His tone is gentle. Blinky frantically shakes his head. Tinky rests his hand on his shoulder.

You’re exhausted, hon.

He gets another head shake in return. T’noy makes a face in the dark. He knows why he’s doing this; it doesn’t make it easier.

It’s just us. Promise.

He adjusts Blinky so that he doesn’t slip off his thigh. Blinky stiffens and gets shushed.

Would the rest of the story help?

A hesitant nod.

OK.

As T’noy continues, whispering, Bliklotep darts his eyes around the dark room. He reaches up to grip his big brother’s leg and squeeze. This doesn’t cause Tinky to stumble over his words. They’re the only sound in the house, save for Pokotho’s quiet breathing from behind them. Blinky unwillingly whimpers.

Blinks?

That manages to stop Tinky’s story, his voice laced with concern. Still without fully blinking, Bliklotep lifts himself off his leg with a shuddery breath. T’noy questions if he’s OK. Blinky only shakes his head once and, in a split second decision, dives into his brother’s arms.

Ugh-

Bliklotep crushes him in a hug, hiding his face. Tinky is quick to adjust them so they’re both resting comfortably. He rubs his back, feeling along his spine and shoulder blades. Tinky holds him tighter and starts humming a slow tune instead of continuing the story.

It’s around forty minutes after that when Blinky closes his eyes.

[v-sansings]

For our beloved lemonberry lady <3

🍲, 🎞️, 🛏️,☀️

You know me too well, Holo! As you wish☺️

🍲: If I had to think of anything for this one, hers and V’s would probably be the same thing. Having such a long time spent in the human world, Ena would probably have a couple favorite foods she’s tried to bring back to the compooter.

I’d have to say her and V’s shared comfort food during fall would have to be a tortellini soup: V somehow managed to get the recipe from her mother and when her and ENA made it together, it sealed in a core memory of them spending time together as a couple: laughing and getting ingredients all over the place. It’s one of their favorites not just because its fucking delicious, but also because of its sentimental value🥰

🎞️: Both women enjoy movies that are soft and gentle compared to more action based movies(that’s more Moony’s speed).

That and since they both love music, it’s become a tradition for when V and ENA hop into comfy vintage pjs and watch things, it’ll be things like Ghibli movies, period romances like Pride and Prejudice, and maybe some recorded or movie musicals if they’re feeling a little peppier. It helps them both relax🎶

🛏️: Without a doubt. Both of them would try to, but when it doesn’t work, they both wake up tangled in blankets and with no escape. Until they can figure out what to do, they just get as close to each other as they can while they’re squeezed into the blanket and push themselves together like ingredients in a pressure cooker🥲

☀️: I have a feeling that neither one particularly likes the brutal heat of a southern summer. Spring is nice but it also is the time for bugs to swarm in after a long winter and they are particularly angry when they wake up.

Fall is the best time for both women cause it’s not freezing to the point where ENA can’t take the cold anymore(the computer world doesn’t often get winter cold), but it’s not so hot that V will pass out from heat exhaustion.

Fall has so many benefits; the sun finally cools just enough for going outside to be enjoyable, there’s all sorts of special flavors for things, you can bundle up in the cutest little sweaters and skirts, etc etc. That and there’s always Halloween: which is a time that both women go crazy over! Funky music, cool costumes, scary movies, and cool decorations everywhere!

What’s not to love!🌞✨

[rainydawgradioblog]

the greatest love SONGS known to man

Singer/songwriter Adrianne Lenker, lead singer of the band Big Thief, has blessed us with quite possibly the greatest love songs known to man through her 2020 solo project album literally entitled 'songs' . most of you have probably heard the song ‘Anything’ on TikTok, or at least those who are on the side of TikTok I’m on, and I’m happily here to inform you there’s more where that came from! Adrianne sings about magic, nostalgia, loss, vulnerability, the universe, and, of course, love. she articulates all of our feelings much better than you ever could, trust me! so here are my two cents on each of the songs on songs, which I hope convince you to love her just as much as I do, or at least give the album a listen. without further ado, songs, by Adrianne Lenker! The Greeks had Plato, we have her. 

two reverse: the most beautiful opening song - it is an unapologetic declaration of deep, all-consuming love that sets the tone for the rest of the album. the guitar and her voice of course are wonderful as well, overall just gets you so excited for what’s to come. who is Grandmother Juniper and where is her recipe?

ingydar: tickles my brain like no other. her little harmonies with herself? so good. every time I listen I have to relisten because it scratches something up there. the lyricism in this one I think is particularly good; everything eats and is eaten? poetic. this song just continues to explore themes of wishing everything that was temporary could stay a little longer and longing for it when it’s gone. the sentimental audience will love this one.

anything: what even needs to be said about this song - there is a reason it is her most popular solo project song. words cannot even do it justice! it’s such a soft song yet I find myself wanting to scream it every time in plays. this song I think is the accumulation of every good element of the album put into one; calming melody, lovely guitar, insane lyricism. how does she so perfectly articulate the impermanence of love itself? dragon in the new warm mountain didn’t you believe in me? this one seriously can’t be beat. I’ve never listened to it and not played it over again. shoutout the little ‘woo’ at the end. 

forwards beckon rebound: this song feels very Adrianne and feels a little like an homage to some of her older solo projects. it’s towards the middle of the album and definitely more somber than the songs that precede it, so if you’re into that, awesome. 

heavy focus: i listen to this one and i wonder why i am not around a campfire playing it right now. it’s one of the more folksy ones on the album and feels very reminiscent of ambiguous old times, almost a post-loss song, hence why it belongs to campfires and old summer nights. it’ll make you shed a tear, or at least it does for me. 

half return: Adrianne has a very special talent on romanticizing the mundane. this one similarly feels very reminiscent on old times, not even necessarily positive old times. yet somehow she sings about that rusty swing set in Minneapolis and i want to go to it? i love it. 

come: the guitar for so long at the beginning - we’re building up to maybe the most heart-wrenching song on the album. and her vocals coming it at the beginning, like come on. it’s slow, it’s lovely, and it hurts so much. it is the perfect song in the middle of the album to just bring you to tears; in an album about love and reminiscing and impermanence she includes this ballad of death, of the fear, of the cold. it’s a song about loss yet there’s such a deep love here that you feel throughout that Adrianne captures so perfectly, shows exactly why she’s so great at what she does. the guitar fading out at the end. brava. 

zombie girl: innocent, sweet, wholesome. this one captures the feeling of new love, of the feeling of it being totally encapsulating, and scary, and the initial curiosity and excitement of getting to know a new person, almost before life gets in the way. the birds are also a nice touch. 

not a lot, just forever: Adrianne’s magnum opus. are you kidding? this song is everything. the entire album Adrianne sings about how things just pass and this song just talks about how deeply you want to hold onto that love. to hold on to everything. it is the greatest acceptance and painful song about losing, about loving so deeply you wish it could be permanent. you want to intertwine yourself with another person in hopes they’ll stay with you forever. it hurts. it hurts so badly. how easy it could be to stay here forever. the ups and downs of love, the poison, the longing, the earthly paradise another person can feel like. not a lot, just forever. i cry. 

dragon eyes: this is song is what being in love feels like. the longing to just want to be recognized by another person. it’s as if she perfectly articulates the beauty of simple pleasures of another person. the transformative powers of love? it’s just so lovely. this is how i feel, i always end up listening to it again. also, the guitar is particularly good in this one. 

my angel: the ending credits to songs. amazing. enticing. tear jerking. beautiful. it would only make sense for the album to end so softly. i love how she’s used the entire album to talk about her love in comparison to the natural elements all around her, the sparrows, the wind, the dragons. however, the person she loves is an angel. a mythical creature sent by something higher, that’s what this song is about. she concludes the album with the comparison to the heavens. How could love be a force that can be explained by anything on earth? it feels so much greater. once again, i’m a fan. 

that's all! thanks for reading! go take a listen!

xoxo,

gabi

[dionysianmirth]

i love this recipe and have been making it for about a year with some thoughts

i only add 2 ingredients so it’s 3 things total but they do wonders and it looks deceptively simple/plain despite the flavor punch it packs.

i don’t fry the potatoes or add any oil (don’t worry, the last ingredient will take care of it) but i do peel the potatoes because i found the fry is too much work to flavor ratio (it’s a lot more active to monitor the potatoes for browning than to peel and throw them in a big pot and set a timer, but it does give it a very savory french fry flavor if you do decide to fry them first), and potato skins can cause stomach discomfort if you eat too much of it (something about enzymes?). it’s quite fast and low effort to remove the skin with a good peeler (i use the cheap $15 for 3 y-shaped peeler recommended by everyone from professional chefs to reviewers by kuhn rikon that is scary sharp and cheap enough to replace often despite it staying sharper than most of my peelers for longer) then:

i boil the potatoes in chicken broth (i use the knorr professional flavor base because it comes in a huge tub that you can use with rice and stuff, you just gotta chip off a little piece of the thing and it lasts forever without being $$$) and

throw a few blocks of a savory cheese instead of adding butter or cream. i found that this recipe is especially good at incorporating cheese because it mixes beautifully without getting the chewy or stringy texture when you make cheese too hot but it still add the butterfat flavor + the characteristics of the cheese without needing to use actual butter which i never seem to have on hand (i use the $14, four pound block of cheddar that i get from walmart and cut into rough chunks based on my intended usage before freezing. the cheese is cheap asf but tends to get moldy quickly if not used quick enough or if the fridge isn’t cold enough.) i’ve only tried a few standard blocks of cheese like the colby jack and cheddar you get in the refrigerated section, im not sure if soft cheeses would work as well with the flavor of the mashed potatoes or if hard aged cheeses would melt as easily, you might have to grate it first instead of just. throwing a 1.5 inch cube into the saucepan like i did when i made this but it still tastes great and you can’t even tell that there isn’t “butter” in it and it has more flavor depth than butter or cream alone

the broth will take care of the saltiness and the cheese will add the butterfat flavor missing from the butter so it doesn’t taste bland or inedible. you can add spices during the boiling period like garlic and onion powder or even like dried herbs for maximum flavor, but it’s honestly good enough to eat on its own.

the mashed potatoes are to die for and freeze beautifully so i’ll usually make this is bulk and freeze a bunch. it’ll be a bit grainy when reheating because the water will have separated from the cells of the potatoes but recooking it over the stove and mixing it a bit will bring it back to the original flavor and texture, maybe a little less wet and more deluxe or dense tasting if anything.

it’s savory, hearty, and comforting as fuck honestly. looks beautiful with a slight yellow tinge and would do numbers at a potluck since it scales well without a lot of additional work. i honestly ate more of this than i’m comfortable sharing when i was in the throes of depression esp. since i didn’t feel too bad since potatoes are the somewhat nutritionally complete (not entirely, you’ll need to supplement a few things but good enough when you’re tight on cash and have no energy)

the only upgrade i can think of would be to pass the mash through a sieve instead of mashing inside the pot (or a drum sieve if you’re fancy) as that helps with texture allegedly but i just used a fork. they’re soft enough usually after boiling. or like better ingredients but we’re here to ball on a budget

My perfect mashed potatoes

The secret is in the water; literally, it’s IN the water.

See, when you boil potatoes, a lot of special starches and sugars and stuff leeches out into the water. When you drain the water before mashing them, you throw away a lot of good stuff, which is a big part of what makes mashed potatoes “dry” and bland, even when you add large amounts of cream and butter and things.

So don’t throw out any water.

Here’s how you do that:

First, cut your potatoes into smaller cubes than you probably do. (I’ve left the skins on for flavor and also, that’s where a lot of a potato’s nutrients are, like protien and iron and vitamins B and C, just to name a few)

The reason for cutting them smaller (besides avoiding giant peices of skin) is so that there is less space in the pot between each peice for water to fill, so you use less water to cook them. That’s important because you won’t be draining any water, so you can’t afford to have too much water! For the same reason, just barely cover them with water when they go on the stove.

But! Before you do that, put the pot on the stove with some butter, garlic, and seasonings; let the butter start to sizxle just a little then put most of a single layer of potatoes in the pan and let the brown and sear. Turn them, brown them on all sides, get ‘em fairly dark (I forgot to get a pic here because I was worried I’d burn the butter).

Ready? now throw the rest of the potatoes in right on top, and add your water, give them a stir. This way, you’re boiling in some of that lovely fried potato/french fry flavor.

Okay, so, as they cook, you may need to add a little water, not too much! ideally the very highest piece of potato will be poking just above the surface. Now, when your potatoes are really really soft, mash them directly into the water. Just pull them off the stove, leave all the water in, and start mashing. Trust me. At first you’ll think there’s too much water. If you get them mashed and they ARE a little too liquidy, just put ‘em back on the stove. You’ll have to stir often or constantly, but they will steam off additional water without losing any good stuff.

Now add some salt, and taste. Right?! And you haven’t even put in any cream or cheese or anything yet.

Speaking of which, you can use like, a third of the amount of butter or cream or anything, and they will still taste better than usual. So they taste better AND they are higher in nutrients AND lower in fats and salts! That’s a lot of win — enjoy your potatoes!

Fuck Columbus! Indigenous Rights! And happy Thanksgiving!

[cleverhottubmiracle]

The Congressional Budget Office recently projected that Social Security could face a cash-flow crunch in 10 years. If no changes are made to the program’s funding structure, benefits would have to shrink by 23% in 2035. This is problematic for many U.S. households that rely on Social Security as a primary income source or are still working but have limited retirement savings. Many of you fall into the latter category. Like me, you’re still working, but retirement is closer than we’d like to admit. And no matter how much you have saved, it’s scary to give up your paycheck — while retaining your taste for stylish clothes, amazing food, and memorable adventures. So, let’s talk about five new strategies to help lock in the comfortable retirement we deserve. Source: Canva. Gamify your wealth The problem with traditional retirement advice is that it’s boring. Adding up what you spend, making a budget, tracking performance against your budget, prioritizing paying off debt…it’s all about as interesting as Charlie Brown’s teacher. If you can’t stand to budget or track your spending, there is another way. Try making it a personal game to spend less on everything. While this strategy isn’t as precise as setting spending limits, it is vastly more motivating. The way you implement this will vary based on your shopping habits, but here are some examples: Challenge yourself to spend less on groceries this week versus last week. Repeat the challenge every week until you’re a master of getting more from your food budget. Try shopping from the sale flyer and buying generic products. Experiment with vegetarian meals by swapping tofu into your favorite recipes. Embrace cheap ingredients like rice and dried beans, both of which you can cook up easily in an Instant Pot. Swear off impulse buys. Don’t buy anything without price-shopping and looking for coupon codes. Browser extensions like Rakuten and PayPal Honey make this easy, at least when you’re shopping online. Use cashback apps and loyalty programs to your full advantage. I have earned thousands from loyalty programs, cashback credit cards, receipt apps and, yes, even the apps that pay you to play games. Do your own nails and get a low-maintenance haircut. You can save thousands annually by limiting your salon visits. Never assume you have the lowest price on recurring purchases. I recently realized that the “subscribe-and-save” price I was paying to Amazon for a certain product was higher than the going rate at a store near my house. My mistake? Blindly assuming Amazon had the best deal. Don’t do that. Always price-shop your recurring purchases, whether it’s a bottle of SPF moisturizer or your car insurance.   Invest more and here’s how Investing more today could be your most impactful wealth-building strategy. This is a simple, mathematical truth. Say you are 50 and you hope to retire at 65. The money you invest now has 15 years to grow. The money you invest in 10 years has less potential because it only has five years to grow. And yes, the normal ups and downs of the stock market ensure that your investment growth will not be linear. But you can lessen the uncertainty by investing every month. In investing-speak, this is called dollar-cost averaging. A small regular investment can benefit your bottom line more than larger, periodic investments. Try these strategies to invest more: Raise your 401(k) contribution rate. Because traditional 401(k) contributions are pretax, they reduce income taxes withheld from your pay. For this reason, when you raise your contribution, you see a smaller reduction in your net pay. It’s kind of like free money. Take advantage. Start investing $15 monthly in a taxable brokerage account. Open a no-fee brokerage account and set up automated investments. Pick an amount you won’t miss. If you are gamifying your wealth as recommended above, those habits should unlock at least $15 monthly. Start there or go higher if you can afford it. If you don’t know what to invest in, pick an S&P 500 fund with a low expense ratio. Tackle the debt High-rate debt is a nasty wealth problem. It consumes your hard-earned cash with interest charges that add no value to your life. Here is the process for paying down debt: Reduce your regular spending so your debt balances aren’t rising monthly. You can’t stop using the credit cards until your budget balances. Chop up the credit cards. Don’t close them as this can lower your credit score. Pick one debt account to pay down at a time. It makes sense to start with the highest interest rate, but you could also start with the lowest balance for a quick win. Pay the first account off and move to the next one. Repeat until you are debt-free. Only consolidate debt into a longer-term loan as a last resort. Whether you use home equity or a debt consolidation loan, these facilities tend to introduce more problems than they solve. Consider balance transfers only if you commit to repaying the full balance before the promotional rate expires. Know that if you can’t get past the first step above, you will need to go the traditional route: Make a budget and enforce spending limits on yourself. Also consider recruiting some close friends to be your debt support group. Love your job Loving your job is an overlooked wealth strategy. When you know what aspects of your job you enjoy the most, it’s easier to identify: Related career paths that can raise your income Side hustle ideas that could grow into a business Part-time roles that could replace your full-time gig in case you want to slow-roll into retirement Feeling fulfilled at the end of your workday also keeps you sharp and healthy. You may be willing and able to work longer — say into your 70s — and spend less on medical bills as a result. Both efforts contribute to greater wealth later in life. Know yourself   Have you ever bought something you ended up hardly using? You’re not alone. In 2023, GoBankingRates quoted these shocking statistics about non-essential purchases: Americans spend $3,768 on impulse buys, according to Ramsey Solutions. Americans throw away 11.3 million tons of clothes annually according to Earth.org. Americans spend an average of $18,000 annually on nonessential purchases as reported by Vox. The trick to stemming unnecessary purchases is knowing yourself well enough to make disciplined shopping decisions. Often, the strongest urges to buy don’t come from need. You might instead be frustrated, bored, excited, or stressed out. Understanding those feelings and how they impact your spending is an important aspect of good financial management. Even if you can’t quite identify the motivations behind your spending, you can implement some practical strategies to slow the impulse buys. One effective strategy is a waiting period. Before you buy anything other than food or gas, make yourself wait 24 hours before you complete the transaction. In that time, consider why you want the item and how it will add value to your life. Wealth strategies for the retirement you want The reality is that Social Security won’t fund a stylish and interesting retirement, in its current state or any future state. That’s why it’s critical to take charge of your finances now. Small efforts to curb spending, invest more, pay down debt, and find enjoyment in work will pay off over time. Your future self will thank you for the wealth and confidence you built in the process. Source link

[norajworld]

The Congressional Budget Office recently projected that Social Security could face a cash-flow crunch in 10 years. If no changes are made to the program’s funding structure, benefits would have to shrink by 23% in 2035. This is problematic for many U.S. households that rely on Social Security as a primary income source or are still working but have limited retirement savings. Many of you fall into the latter category. Like me, you’re still working, but retirement is closer than we’d like to admit. And no matter how much you have saved, it’s scary to give up your paycheck — while retaining your taste for stylish clothes, amazing food, and memorable adventures. So, let’s talk about five new strategies to help lock in the comfortable retirement we deserve. Source: Canva. Gamify your wealth The problem with traditional retirement advice is that it’s boring. Adding up what you spend, making a budget, tracking performance against your budget, prioritizing paying off debt…it’s all about as interesting as Charlie Brown’s teacher. If you can’t stand to budget or track your spending, there is another way. Try making it a personal game to spend less on everything. While this strategy isn’t as precise as setting spending limits, it is vastly more motivating. The way you implement this will vary based on your shopping habits, but here are some examples: Challenge yourself to spend less on groceries this week versus last week. Repeat the challenge every week until you’re a master of getting more from your food budget. Try shopping from the sale flyer and buying generic products. Experiment with vegetarian meals by swapping tofu into your favorite recipes. Embrace cheap ingredients like rice and dried beans, both of which you can cook up easily in an Instant Pot. Swear off impulse buys. Don’t buy anything without price-shopping and looking for coupon codes. Browser extensions like Rakuten and PayPal Honey make this easy, at least when you’re shopping online. Use cashback apps and loyalty programs to your full advantage. I have earned thousands from loyalty programs, cashback credit cards, receipt apps and, yes, even the apps that pay you to play games. Do your own nails and get a low-maintenance haircut. You can save thousands annually by limiting your salon visits. Never assume you have the lowest price on recurring purchases. I recently realized that the “subscribe-and-save” price I was paying to Amazon for a certain product was higher than the going rate at a store near my house. My mistake? Blindly assuming Amazon had the best deal. Don’t do that. Always price-shop your recurring purchases, whether it’s a bottle of SPF moisturizer or your car insurance.   Invest more and here’s how Investing more today could be your most impactful wealth-building strategy. This is a simple, mathematical truth. Say you are 50 and you hope to retire at 65. The money you invest now has 15 years to grow. The money you invest in 10 years has less potential because it only has five years to grow. And yes, the normal ups and downs of the stock market ensure that your investment growth will not be linear. But you can lessen the uncertainty by investing every month. In investing-speak, this is called dollar-cost averaging. A small regular investment can benefit your bottom line more than larger, periodic investments. Try these strategies to invest more: Raise your 401(k) contribution rate. Because traditional 401(k) contributions are pretax, they reduce income taxes withheld from your pay. For this reason, when you raise your contribution, you see a smaller reduction in your net pay. It’s kind of like free money. Take advantage. Start investing $15 monthly in a taxable brokerage account. Open a no-fee brokerage account and set up automated investments. Pick an amount you won’t miss. If you are gamifying your wealth as recommended above, those habits should unlock at least $15 monthly. Start there or go higher if you can afford it. If you don’t know what to invest in, pick an S&P 500 fund with a low expense ratio. Tackle the debt High-rate debt is a nasty wealth problem. It consumes your hard-earned cash with interest charges that add no value to your life. Here is the process for paying down debt: Reduce your regular spending so your debt balances aren’t rising monthly. You can’t stop using the credit cards until your budget balances. Chop up the credit cards. Don’t close them as this can lower your credit score. Pick one debt account to pay down at a time. It makes sense to start with the highest interest rate, but you could also start with the lowest balance for a quick win. Pay the first account off and move to the next one. Repeat until you are debt-free. Only consolidate debt into a longer-term loan as a last resort. Whether you use home equity or a debt consolidation loan, these facilities tend to introduce more problems than they solve. Consider balance transfers only if you commit to repaying the full balance before the promotional rate expires. Know that if you can’t get past the first step above, you will need to go the traditional route: Make a budget and enforce spending limits on yourself. Also consider recruiting some close friends to be your debt support group. Love your job Loving your job is an overlooked wealth strategy. When you know what aspects of your job you enjoy the most, it’s easier to identify: Related career paths that can raise your income Side hustle ideas that could grow into a business Part-time roles that could replace your full-time gig in case you want to slow-roll into retirement Feeling fulfilled at the end of your workday also keeps you sharp and healthy. You may be willing and able to work longer — say into your 70s — and spend less on medical bills as a result. Both efforts contribute to greater wealth later in life. Know yourself   Have you ever bought something you ended up hardly using? You’re not alone. In 2023, GoBankingRates quoted these shocking statistics about non-essential purchases: Americans spend $3,768 on impulse buys, according to Ramsey Solutions. Americans throw away 11.3 million tons of clothes annually according to Earth.org. Americans spend an average of $18,000 annually on nonessential purchases as reported by Vox. The trick to stemming unnecessary purchases is knowing yourself well enough to make disciplined shopping decisions. Often, the strongest urges to buy don’t come from need. You might instead be frustrated, bored, excited, or stressed out. Understanding those feelings and how they impact your spending is an important aspect of good financial management. Even if you can’t quite identify the motivations behind your spending, you can implement some practical strategies to slow the impulse buys. One effective strategy is a waiting period. Before you buy anything other than food or gas, make yourself wait 24 hours before you complete the transaction. In that time, consider why you want the item and how it will add value to your life. Wealth strategies for the retirement you want The reality is that Social Security won’t fund a stylish and interesting retirement, in its current state or any future state. That’s why it’s critical to take charge of your finances now. Small efforts to curb spending, invest more, pay down debt, and find enjoyment in work will pay off over time. Your future self will thank you for the wealth and confidence you built in the process. Source link

[projectilecry]

crock pots are fucking magical. get one, you can seriously pick them up for cheap at like goodwill and places like that, and look up some slow cooker recipes. the crock pot does the work for you while you go do other shit and you come back and have wonderful delicious fucking food ready for you. (and the crock pot is a jewish invention!!)

you don’t need lids for all of your pots. it makes them more annoying and harder to store. get a flat lid or two that’s pretty big so that you can use it for like any pot or pan you have. if they come with lids don’t just throw them away, but you can pretty safely put them an an annoying to reach area for long term storage if you have the flat lids.

a tip on food safety/storage: the rule i learned for foods that need to be refrigerated (like dairy and meat and anything that contains a decent bit of either) to keep them safe to eat was essentially a rule of fours. these foods have a window of four hours (cumulatively!!) that they can be in conditions between 40°f and 140°f and still be safe to consume. after that amount of time is up, they’ve been in suitable temperatures to harbor and grow bacteria for long enough that you really shouldn’t eat them. this is a bit flexible for some foods if they are uncooked and you’re going thoroughly cook them before eating, but it’s generally not the best practice. whole cuts of red meat like beef or lamb is probably the best bet for this type of treatment (or cheese, but some cheese doesn’t need to be refrigerated in the first place) (it’s often the hard cheeses that can do without refrigeration, the soft and wet cheeses should always be refrigerated just like dairy milk) as they are generally less dangerous bacteria prone than poultry, but it’s not advisable in general. moral of the story, don’t freak out if you accidentally leave your expensive tenderloin roast you were looking forward to out on the counter for five hours, just check it out to make sure nothing seems to have changed with it and it doesn’t now smell or look obviously off and it should be completely fine once properly cooked. do not, however, do this with any ground meats, as they can and do develop bacteria all throughout (every exposed surface is another place for bacteria to easily grow) much quicker than whole cuts (plus the die/extrusion plates used with the grinder and the grinder itself can easily harbor and grow its own bacteria which is then transferred to your meat when it’s ground). this is why humans can generally eat steaks that are still pretty raw inside, but you don’t and shouldn’t eat a burger that’s been barely cooked at all (a bit of pink is fine, but if it still looks raw at all or is a darker red it should be cooked more). the phrase i remember this rule by is four between forty and one-forty - maximum of four hours spent between the temperatures of 40°f and 140°f.

spices are your friends and aren’t scary. you don’t need super good quality of everything at first, there’s no need for the $10+ tiny jars of artesian garlic powder, the cheap store brand stuff will do unless you decide to invest in higher quality ones later. don’t be afraid to use them and experiment with them. sure, don’t dump like tablespoons of things in your food without knowing what you’re doing first, but add a little at a time and taste frequently when it’s safe too and you’ll get more comfortable with them in no time. the worst thing that will happen is your food ends up underseasoned, which can be pretty easily fixed (unlike overseasoning).

there is no real way to stop pasta from boiling over and doing that weird starch foam thing it does other than just having a really fucking big and oversized pot to the point there’s so much pot and so little water it physically can’t climb the whole side. none of those tricks and hacks you see will consistently stop it, and while some like putting a wooden spoon across the top can help mitigate the damage a little bit, you’re going to have a little boil over sometimes. don’t freak out about it, just turn down the heat a little bit and stir it around to collapse the bubbles. it’s not going to ruin anything, it’s literally just water and starch, and it’s quicker and easier to clean the outside of your pot and wipe your cooktop down after you’re done than it is to try to outright prevent boil-overs.

good and sharp knives keep you safe, especially if you’re not as good with them in the first place. i cannot stress this enough. sharp knives actually do what you want them to do and don’t require you to put half your body weight into leverage to try to cut something. a dull knife requires you to exert all sorts of weird force on it to get it to do what you want and increases your risk of it slipping and accidentally cutting you exponentially. be careful, of course, like you should with anything sharp at all, but don’t be afraid to work with properly sharp knives. if you’re uncomfortable with your skills, try practicing often on things you don’t necessarily need to cut but can. if you’re eating an apple for a snack, why not go cut it up beforehand for some extra practice instead of eating off the core?

you can grow a lot of your own vegetables pretty easily, and even from store bought ones!! you can make a simple container garden out of a home depot bucket or anything like it with a few holes poked in the bottom to allow drainage. squash are pretty easy to grow from seed (though you may want to start them inside in a small pot and transfer them into your outside containers once they’re not seedlings anymore, especially if you have rabbits) and fairly hearty, and if you chuck a grocery store tomato in any old patch of dirt it’ll probably start growing little baby plants by itself.

Anyway some things to follow when youre a beginner cook:

Don’t constantly shift your food around in the pan if you want to form a crust on it, the less you move it the better.

Don’t be afraid to add water if youre frying up food and the food/sauce looks a bit dry.

Don’t fry up your garlic early on in the cooking process (unless youre making a quick garlic oil) as the garlic flavour can straight up disappear if overcooked for too long and/or the garlic can become bitter if burnt

Don’t overcook your vegetables. Look up recommended cook times for them. Your distaste for vegetables stems from them being overcooked and being poorly seasoned.

Don’t microwave stuff for more than 2 minutes at a time unless you know what you’re doing. Reheating stuff tends to fare better when you mix food between microwaving times since microwaves develop hotspots if you microwave it uninterrupted for too long.

Don’t try cooking everything at the hottest setting. It’s super tempting to have a high flame and do a meal quickly but actually follow directions and cook at medium or low heat.

[chilimili212]

The Congressional Budget Office recently projected that Social Security could face a cash-flow crunch in 10 years. If no changes are made to the program’s funding structure, benefits would have to shrink by 23% in 2035. This is problematic for many U.S. households that rely on Social Security as a primary income source or are still working but have limited retirement savings. Many of you fall into the latter category. Like me, you’re still working, but retirement is closer than we’d like to admit. And no matter how much you have saved, it’s scary to give up your paycheck — while retaining your taste for stylish clothes, amazing food, and memorable adventures. So, let’s talk about five new strategies to help lock in the comfortable retirement we deserve. Source: Canva. Gamify your wealth The problem with traditional retirement advice is that it’s boring. Adding up what you spend, making a budget, tracking performance against your budget, prioritizing paying off debt…it’s all about as interesting as Charlie Brown’s teacher. If you can’t stand to budget or track your spending, there is another way. Try making it a personal game to spend less on everything. While this strategy isn’t as precise as setting spending limits, it is vastly more motivating. The way you implement this will vary based on your shopping habits, but here are some examples: Challenge yourself to spend less on groceries this week versus last week. Repeat the challenge every week until you’re a master of getting more from your food budget. Try shopping from the sale flyer and buying generic products. Experiment with vegetarian meals by swapping tofu into your favorite recipes. Embrace cheap ingredients like rice and dried beans, both of which you can cook up easily in an Instant Pot. Swear off impulse buys. Don’t buy anything without price-shopping and looking for coupon codes. Browser extensions like Rakuten and PayPal Honey make this easy, at least when you’re shopping online. Use cashback apps and loyalty programs to your full advantage. I have earned thousands from loyalty programs, cashback credit cards, receipt apps and, yes, even the apps that pay you to play games. Do your own nails and get a low-maintenance haircut. You can save thousands annually by limiting your salon visits. Never assume you have the lowest price on recurring purchases. I recently realized that the “subscribe-and-save” price I was paying to Amazon for a certain product was higher than the going rate at a store near my house. My mistake? Blindly assuming Amazon had the best deal. Don’t do that. Always price-shop your recurring purchases, whether it’s a bottle of SPF moisturizer or your car insurance.   Invest more and here’s how Investing more today could be your most impactful wealth-building strategy. This is a simple, mathematical truth. Say you are 50 and you hope to retire at 65. The money you invest now has 15 years to grow. The money you invest in 10 years has less potential because it only has five years to grow. And yes, the normal ups and downs of the stock market ensure that your investment growth will not be linear. But you can lessen the uncertainty by investing every month. In investing-speak, this is called dollar-cost averaging. A small regular investment can benefit your bottom line more than larger, periodic investments. Try these strategies to invest more: Raise your 401(k) contribution rate. Because traditional 401(k) contributions are pretax, they reduce income taxes withheld from your pay. For this reason, when you raise your contribution, you see a smaller reduction in your net pay. It’s kind of like free money. Take advantage. Start investing $15 monthly in a taxable brokerage account. Open a no-fee brokerage account and set up automated investments. Pick an amount you won’t miss. If you are gamifying your wealth as recommended above, those habits should unlock at least $15 monthly. Start there or go higher if you can afford it. If you don’t know what to invest in, pick an S&P 500 fund with a low expense ratio. Tackle the debt High-rate debt is a nasty wealth problem. It consumes your hard-earned cash with interest charges that add no value to your life. Here is the process for paying down debt: Reduce your regular spending so your debt balances aren’t rising monthly. You can’t stop using the credit cards until your budget balances. Chop up the credit cards. Don’t close them as this can lower your credit score. Pick one debt account to pay down at a time. It makes sense to start with the highest interest rate, but you could also start with the lowest balance for a quick win. Pay the first account off and move to the next one. Repeat until you are debt-free. Only consolidate debt into a longer-term loan as a last resort. Whether you use home equity or a debt consolidation loan, these facilities tend to introduce more problems than they solve. Consider balance transfers only if you commit to repaying the full balance before the promotional rate expires. Know that if you can’t get past the first step above, you will need to go the traditional route: Make a budget and enforce spending limits on yourself. Also consider recruiting some close friends to be your debt support group. Love your job Loving your job is an overlooked wealth strategy. When you know what aspects of your job you enjoy the most, it’s easier to identify: Related career paths that can raise your income Side hustle ideas that could grow into a business Part-time roles that could replace your full-time gig in case you want to slow-roll into retirement Feeling fulfilled at the end of your workday also keeps you sharp and healthy. You may be willing and able to work longer — say into your 70s — and spend less on medical bills as a result. Both efforts contribute to greater wealth later in life. Know yourself   Have you ever bought something you ended up hardly using? You’re not alone. In 2023, GoBankingRates quoted these shocking statistics about non-essential purchases: Americans spend $3,768 on impulse buys, according to Ramsey Solutions. Americans throw away 11.3 million tons of clothes annually according to Earth.org. Americans spend an average of $18,000 annually on nonessential purchases as reported by Vox. The trick to stemming unnecessary purchases is knowing yourself well enough to make disciplined shopping decisions. Often, the strongest urges to buy don’t come from need. You might instead be frustrated, bored, excited, or stressed out. Understanding those feelings and how they impact your spending is an important aspect of good financial management. Even if you can’t quite identify the motivations behind your spending, you can implement some practical strategies to slow the impulse buys. One effective strategy is a waiting period. Before you buy anything other than food or gas, make yourself wait 24 hours before you complete the transaction. In that time, consider why you want the item and how it will add value to your life. Wealth strategies for the retirement you want The reality is that Social Security won’t fund a stylish and interesting retirement, in its current state or any future state. That’s why it’s critical to take charge of your finances now. Small efforts to curb spending, invest more, pay down debt, and find enjoyment in work will pay off over time. Your future self will thank you for the wealth and confidence you built in the process. Source link

[wyldefcrged]

SEND ME 🤍 + A SHIP AND I’LL TELL YOU… [ VOL. 3 ] *sneaks this in for Lorelei*

Who cooks meals for the other? Wynter def does the cooking. She actually has specifically laid claim to one of the full/penthouse suites of the hotel because they have a full chef kitchen and pantry and fridge and freezer that she can use and she can always go raid the hotel and restaurants supplies if she needs something and can get exotic herbs and ingredients that come from non human cultures and recipes without anyone batting an eye.

Who spams the other with memes? If anyone does its Lore bc Wynter doesn’t keep up with social media and pop culture enough to get the references and Lore absolutely has to explain every single one if she wants Wynter to actually get it.

Who likes to tidy around the house? Neither so much, that’s what Wynter pays and tips the hotel staff for.

Who likes to play pranks on the other? Lore probably likes to pull some stuff now and then but Wynter isn’t really the prankster jokester type. She’ll tolerate it from Lore tho. If she must.

Who asked the other to move in with them? I mean. Wynter kind of bought a penthouse suite and Lore already lives in the hotel so kinda just. Happened? Lore just kinda migrated in and stays when she wants to.

Who is in charge of the music during a car ride? Lore. Wynter does not care enough to argue about it. Lores music taste does sometimes give her a headache.

Who is more likely to tickle the other mercilessly? Lore probably torments Wynter but lbr anything they do probably turns to fucking pretty quickly b

Who needs to hold the other during scary movies? Neither Lore loves them Wynter will watch them they just kind of entangle flop cuddle on the bed or the couch or floor or whatever.

Who has to help the other when it comes to technology? Neither so much. Wynters up to date for the most part she just doesn’t do the social media doom scrolling Lore might.

Who likes to get a bit frisky in public / an inappropriate setting? Both. Zero shame.

Who wakes up first, and do they wake up the other or let them rest? Probably Wynter. She only sleeps a few hours most nights. She’ll leave Lore sleeping and go train or read the news or catch up on her files or current case info.

Who is always taking pictures of the other when they aren’t looking? Lore. Wynter does take pics of Lore and the two of them and when they’re out and stuff but Lore def takes more.

Who always forgets their wallet and never ends up paying for anything? Probably Lore. Wynter never cares. She knows Lore has money if she needs it but Wynter likes being a provider.

Who can’t sleep because the other snores or moves too much at night? Lore is more restless but it doesn’t bother Wynter at all.

Who is better at video games, and do they let the other win or show no mercy? Lore. Wynter prefers physical board and card games etc. Wynter will play video games but she will get annoyed before too long.

Who always gets up in the middle of the night to use the restroom and accidentally wakes up the other? Maybe Lore up and down, Wynter wakes up enough to realize it’s just her and then goes back to sleep.

[serperioranimations]

BUCKLE UP KIDS, ITS TATER TED TALK TIME

I can definitely be on board with this. I am a disabled artist myself, (neurodivergent/ADHD), and I have a range of characters with physical and mental disabilities, and this also includes Red leader Tord. As well as Tom. And Matt. I’ll put my thoughts and response down below.

I also agree with the scarring points, how in film, evil characters have scars to look more “scary”. There is three examples off the top of my head that literally have the word “scar” in their name. However, I won’t really be discussing that here.

I wouldn’t say MY version of red leader is a bad guy(at least not to Edd, Matt and Tom), he’s moreso just a guy who went about things the wrong way while trying to get his friends recruited. Whole thing. He made up with them eventually. And while he has the ability to come off as intimidating, it’s moreso about the level of power he holds in a room rather than his “scary” appearance.

My portrayals of disability, at least with with red leader tord, mostly focus on the mental effects of his disability. Sure, the physical stress is a lot, but the mental stress of having to worry about your perception and how you are viewed as a disabled person makes a lot of disabilities ten times worse.

He fears that he could get into another accident and lose more of his body and therefore his humanity. Sometimes he has to take his arm off because he hates that he now has to have machinery as his arm. He has nightmares where he’ll be full robot and it freaks him the hell out.

Obviously, there are things that affect him physically too. In the crash, he lost some of his teeth and his cornea had a piece of glass stuck in it and it was damaged. His depth perception is greatly impacted because he’s now blind in his right eye, and he has to wear dentures. He had to change parts of his lifestyle in order to keep them in tact, such as quitting smoking. He also quit because he was scared of getting robot/synthetic lungs and further losing his humanity.

Not to mention, he has to do a lot of work to make sure he can actually LIFT his arm, as it has a lot of machinery in it and that can get quite heavy. He has a lot of frustration surrounding that as well. My version of tord is a tinkerer and always is trying to find new ways to improve something. So his arm is never quite finished. It’s more of an extension to his character than it is a replacement for his arm.

My portrayal of future Tom also has this concept, in the fact that he is blind. His visor does do a lot of things for him, and Tord spent a very long time even trying to get it to work AT ALL.

In a comic I made, it’s implied he had to go through several versions and tests over multiple months to even get him to see ANYTHING. And that comic also implied that it was only a START.

And even if it allows him to see, he still needs to take care of it, he has a backup incase something happens, he has to charge it, all this stuff. And also, it cannot help him see all the time. Like when he turns into a monster.

It can’t help him see when he turns to the size of a building. In fact, when he feels himself turning, he often tries to get the visor off of him as to avoid breaking it because he knows how hard Tord worked on it. But without it, He’s just a giant blind monster who has no idea what’s going on or where he is. And that is a recipe for disaster, my friends.

I will say my representations of technology are not exactly “realistic” and I’ll fully admit that. However, I think it’s important to take into account that sometimes, people just wanna design cool robot stuff that can do cool things. It’s the whole reason people love the idea of flying cars. Yes it’s unrealistic, and we have so many other vehicles that would be way more efficient, but come on- the idea of a flying car is very entertaining. And most of the time, that is what I focus on. If it’s entertaining or interesting.

Plus I’m just like “you know what, I like you- here’s some cool shit you can do cool things with.” That’s how I see the technology in WTFuture. Or at least that’s how I go about it.

In a more realistic and grounded universe outside of Eddsworld, such as my own original story “The Bad Hunters”, I would obviously go about this differently.

But in a world where people can turn into vampires, superhero’s, giant monsters, and just overall break most rules of physics and real life, I think it’s understandable why people in the fandom often default to “because it looks cool” when it comes to designs. After all, I think Edd Gould himself shared this sentiment. 90% of the decisions or jokes he made in his show, I guarantee he made “because it’s funny” or “because it’s cool”.

Like, for example, I have this joke that Tom during meetings will play minesweeper in his headset, because 1- it’s in character that he wouldn’t pay attention to meetings, and 2- it’s funny as hell. And let’s be real- if you’ve been on a zoom meeting that was boring, you’ve probably pulled up minesweeper or solitaire. Is that something realistically that a blind person would be able to do if they had a headset that allowed them to see? Absolutely not. But is it funny? Yes.

Future Matt also has a pretty big disability- that being he has some memory loss related to a brain injury. He got shot in the head and his eye was replaced with a metal one. He also had to get his jaw fixed. He often struggles with remembering what people just told him, and sometimes he forgets where Edd is and that he left. It also, much like Tom and tord and their disabilities, took some getting used to.

He’s also got a mini super computer in his eye that allows him to calculate bullet trajectory and allow him to dodge bullets matrix style. Because fuck it- future Matt is cool, he deserves cool shit. Also because tord was like “aight bro what if I made sure you never got shot in the face again”. Again- is it realistic? No. But is it cool? Yes.

Overall, as an author with disabilities myself, the portrayals of disability I enjoy the most are the ones that acknowledge “this shit sucks” but also are ones that allow for some levity and lightheartedness. This applies to both mental and physical disabilities.

Like toph from ATLA. Yes, she can’t see through the earth and she’s insanely powerful, but also, girlie can’t swim. Obviously, her drowning is no laughing matter, and they don’t make fun of that. But her confidently putting a poster on a wall the wrong way because she can’t see is hilarious.

Or like in arcane, when sevika gets a sick new arm made by jinx, only for it to turn out to be an unpredictable hunk of junk that will do random shit like blast music or shoot fireworks, and sevika is just like “bro are you fucking kidding me”. That may be the most realistic portrayal of a disability aid/tool I’ve ever seen. Sometimes it works great, but sometimes it’s a fucking piece of shit. It also helps that Sevikas arm links to her gambling addiction, hence the slot machine. Sure, it’s not the most “realistic” portrayal, but it does further her character and I think that is also a valid way to write it.

Overall, what I’d say is that I definitely agree with all of what was said above me! These are all valid points and the portrayal of scarring being used the characterize “evil”, or make them look scary, as well as just treating prosthetics as perfect replacements definitely don’t always sit right.

But also I would say that with portraying disability, don’t go the easy way out and basically get rid of their disability by giving them a perfect replacement with no issues that would realistically go along with this. Not just because it’s harmful and disability erasure, but also because it’s boring as shit.

Challenge yourself. Do some research. And most importantly, HAVE FUN.

-your friendly neighborhood tater

The Problem With the Eddsworld Fandom's Depictions of Red Leader/Future Tord, A Disabled Perspective

Disability is a contentious concept for most of society, with most either treating us with disgust, confusion, refusing to treat us as human, or to see our struggles as what they are. Ableism affects all people in many different ways, but as someone who focuses a lot of my energy in fandom spaces, the pervasiveness of ableism with how media and their fans interpet and react to disabled characters is a very personal situation for me. While many may argue that an ignorance to these topics in fiction has little bearing on real life, the prevalance of these tropes have echoed and led to feelings of othering for many disabled people, and oftentimes support the same notions that lead to the day-to-day ableism in our own personal lives.

In recent years, I have experienced this most often with the prevalance of negative disability tropes perpetrated by fanfiction surrounding the character of Tord, also known under the alias of Red Leader in some fanworks. It is a problem not just common in the Eddsworld fandom. A more recent, and much larger fandom in Mouthwashing also shares a common trend of repeated ableism in fan depictions and interpretarions of disabled characters. Most fan creators are unaware of these tropes and the harm that they cause, but as a disabled person, I am unable to ignore it.

For context on myself, you can call me Fish. Get it? Or"fish"eus? I like to think I'm funny. I am a mentally ill, disabled, and neurodivergent creative who has niche interests in representation in media and the intersection of intersectionality and fandom spaces. I experience chronic pain due to a multitude of conditions, all of which are invisible disabilities. I am NOT an amputee or have a facial difference, like the character I am analyzing. I can only speak based on my own research in my attempts to portray him positively, but I want to mainly focus on the ableist tropes I see and the real life effects they have. That is something I CAN focus on, because I've been dealing with it for years from conditions that came onset later in my life. I will be speaking from that perspective, but will be doing my best to try to educate on what I do know from my research to help authors, artists, and creatives create a better portrayal of him in fanworks.

The most common tropes I see with him are what I will call "The Disabled Villain", "The Innacurate Disability", and "The Ignored Disability". There are a few tropes in each, but for ease of organization (and the sake of your (and my) time), I will be talking about them together in these sections. There are also overlaps in many, but I will define the main issues with them.

The Disabled Villain

James Bond, Wonder Woman, The Witches. You name it. You have most likely seen this trope at work in cinema. A malicious evil-doer is revealed to have a "horrid" face symbolic of the true evil within their soul, while the beautiful, able-bodied hero is meant to stop them. It's a trope as old as time, one that goes back to even Plato. Tropes are tropes, people subvert them, so a few cases down the line may be excusable. But that has not been the case For many years, the most prevalent form of representation for disabled people was in these villains. Imagine if the only representation you had for yourself was narratives surrounding how the way you look or what your disability is and have it only be equated to evil people. It leads to a villainization of disabled people. People react to facial differences with disgust, because they are "shown" that it is "evil", or "ugly", or equal to being a horrible person. As stated by The Nora Project, "According to the book Disabilities: Insights from Across Fields and Around the World, disabled students are two to three times more likely to be bullied in comparison to their nondisabled classmates. The disabled villain trope contributes to this phenomenon in overt and subtle ways. For example, the trope implicitly encourages fear of disability and difference, while validating, and even elevating, those who fight against the evil, Disabled Villain. Bullying based on fear and disdain is almost a natural consequence of the trope when viewed in this light". Another big issue is that disabled characters have not been given space to exist outside of villainy. There are not many complex narratives surrounding them. This leads to our disabilities being downplayed, us being dehumanised, and we are seen more like props in real life, or simply tools to achieve a message in a narrative.

Tord's disability is never explicitly shown in the show. It is something more prevalent in Fanon, specifically in fanworks that focus on the "Future" era of the show's timeline, where the narrative and outside discussions on the show implies a high tech society, potentially dystopian, potentially a consequence of his actions. These ideas have taken a life of their own in the fandom, with many creators fully expressing these ideas. The problem arises when Red Leader falls in line with this trope. In many works, he is the sole disabled character, a figure of pure evil, or given little nuance in the narrative. Artists illustrate his scars as bright red, crimson, or, in TBATF, green. For some reason. In this way, they attempt to highlight the villainy by equating him with common symbols of evil: facial differences and disabilities. Unfortunately, these are not just symbols. These are conditions and scars that real people have, which the fandom tends to ignore in favor of dramatization.

This was a trope I most commonly saw explored in fanfiction when I first joined in 2016/17. The show, unfortunately, subtly and accidentally perpetrated it by having the only character visibly and irreparably "damaged" by the giant robot fight be Tord, despite the fact that Tom, who had a whole missile directed at him and got buried under a house, was fine with at most a leg injury and a cut on his arm. Luckily, we have grown past the need for ableist tropes, and the faults of the show can be left in the past!

... Not.

Disability tropes have simply evolved in how the fandom treats Tord. Even if it is now done with more consciousness and sympathy towards his character, ignorance still prevails. Let's talk about common pitfalls people fall into when writing him.

The Inaccurate Disability

In fanon perception, Red Leader is an amputee with a high tech prosthesis and a facial difference resulting from burn scars. Like many disabled characters, he suffers from a collective fandom lack of research. But never fret! That is what I have subjected myself to for the past four years, so your friendly neighborhood disabled Fish can tell you how to right your fandom wrongs! Just kidding! Take this as a pointer, and do your own research.

As is common with fictional prosthetics, his arm prosthetic is treated as a perfect fix for his amputation. It acts just like, if not better than an actual arm. The issue with this is that is isn't realistic. Yes, I know, I'm criticising Eddsworld fanfiction for not being realistic. STAY WITH ME HERE. Once again, if it was one instance, or a few, that explored prosthetics being incredibly functional in science-fiction, then it could be a cool concept. But when every sci-fi work has it, then that is no longer a concept. That is a misconception. And I have interacted with people who believed that prosthetics were 100% functional! The thing is, like all disability aids, it does not suddenly make us able-bodied. For example, I have ear defenders that I wear when I experience pain within my ears. But that does not mean my hearing will now become normal, and I will no longer experience pain from the sound I'm hearing. What WILL happen is that I will straight up not hear you. Like, literally. Can you repeat that? I had my ear defenders on. Oh, you're saying that my ear defenders aren't prosthetics and are not a fair comparison? Well, that's fair, but take this as an illustration of a disability aid and how they differ from able-bodied experiences. Also, many prosthetic users do many things without their prostheses, and some even prefer NOT to wear them. Blogs that explicitly cover disabled representation, such as @/cripplecharacters, have posts that cover WHY many amputees are not fans of this trope. The problem comes with that it erases disability, and yet also treats us like we are given a space at the table of representation. It's just another way that authors avoid actually doing research.

Other things that people tend to ignore are how burn scars, or any scars, would not only appear on a character, but also affect them. I have seen, aside from skin tones that looked like they were picked out of a crayon box instead of what would appear on a person, teeth exposed, wounds that look as if they are fresh from the explosion YEARS after they occurred, and what I like to call "paper shredder" scars. Because instead of them looking like burn or shrapnel scars, it appears as if his skin was put through a shredder. Once again, another consequence of the show's at most-30 second scene with questionable decisions that made massive ripples in the fandom. With the injuries Tord received, it is most likely that he would have two kinds of injuries: a burn on 18% of his body (minimum, based on rule of 9s), and/or shrapnel scars from debris. While shrapnel scars would manifest as darker scars, the burn scar would likely be a hypertrophic scar, as "70% of patients develop hypertrophic scars following burns" (Finnerty et. al). The scars, when healed, are warm toned on the boundaries of their areas and cool in between. When on a pale skintone, they are not too dissimilar, and would therefore not have such a drastic color difference as seen on skin. They would also not go down to the bone or skin, as that would be a completely different kind of injury, and are also commonly done to make him look "scarier", which then aids the Disabled Villain trope. It also treats these scars and injuries more like a work of fiction, rather than something that many real people have experienced, adding to continuous misinterpretations of real life disabilities and facial differences.

For writers wanting to include consequences of burns, what would be more likely to be affected are his hearing, vision, and nerves on the right side of his face, as burn scars can go as deep as nerve endings. Also, burn scars, especially third degree burns, require treatments, such as burn-specific skincare. Scars, especially burn scars, can affect you and become disabling. For artists, the main thing I don't see artists do is draw him with damaged hair follicles. Burn scars damage the scalp and eyebrows, preventing hair growth. I am sorry, but he would not still have fluffy, luscious hair. Do not kill me. He just wouldn't. And if you are saying that he had it in the show, I can't hear you because my ear defenders are on, but I hope you heard me, as we've gone over that the show is inaccurate and we should do our own research.

Even well intentioned authors and artists ignore many aspects of the disabilities he would likely have!

Which brings us to the last trope...

The Ignored Disability

Many well meaning people intend to give him nuance by trying to avoid the Disabled Villain trope. Accidentally, however, they end up completely ignoring his disabilities instead.

Just like the high-tech prosthetic, the real disabling aspects of having a disability are at best rarely mentioned. I have seen, in some fanworks, that he goes straight from amputation to having a prosthetic. And that is where his disability ends. Because the prosthetic ends up being a fix-all situation. Authors refuse, or forget, to include aspects of amputation, such as the healing process, stump or phantom pain. Artists will cover up his scars with a helmet or a mask, another trope that undermines his disabilities and attempts to brush it under the rug. I understand that there is a discomfort for able-bodied authors in thoroughly exploring how a character feels about their disability. That is something I think we should. Avoid. If you're not familiar with the experience of being that minority, you do not need to add commentary on it. And if you do, and it just falls into more negative tropes, I will send a salmon cannon at you (/j). However, I do not agree with brushing every disabling aspect of his life under the rug.

People can assume it's not a problem, like it isn't something blatantly apparent. But, if you assume that disability and being disabled is not a "big thing", you end up where your medication is denied because your insurance refuses to see your common procedure as not a necessary medical intervention because you're "too young". And that is not fiction. That is what inspired me to write this essay, because the day that I got that news was the same day I sat down and told myself that I needed to share my perspective on the perception of disabled characters by honing in on one of my favorite characters and how the fandom treated him.

Disabled characters deserve to be included in media, disability and all, with care given to how their life would operate as a result and what they would experience with their specific disability. That's why many people recommend sensitivity readers who can give proper insight upon that disability and can advise people to properly portray it.

But if you cannot afford or access that resource, what can you do?

Fish's Non-Cohesive List of Ways I Tried to Write Tord as a Non-Amputee Without a Facial Difference

Do research!! The more you are to try to understand what you are writing about, the less you are to misinterpret or misrepresent it.

Look into resources that focus on portraying disabled characters, especially with those you wish to write about. Read blogs, research tropes that are common in disabled characters, and hell, read medical journals. They can provide great insight (<< nerd who likes reading medical journals)

Include more disabled characters. Make the other boys be disabled! Want to be canon compliant? Create OCs who have disabilities! I have a bunch! It's 2024! Be cringe and be free! The character's disability would go against the traditional narrative form of "usefulness"? I'm an animator who can't wear headphones and a theatre performer who can't physically handle the volume of a band. And yet, we find ways to persist, to exist. We will always find our way to live in the way we want to, in whatever way we can.

Look into disability activism. Learn the difference between the Medical Model and Social Model of disability. Know what an invisible disability is. Listen to us when we say that we don't want to be treated as special or an inspiration for simply living (inspiration porn). The more you are aware of what we struggle in real life, the more aware you will be to not repeat those mistakes in your fiction.

Write what you can. Highlight little talked about aspects of having a burn scar or being an amputee, such as the recovery, or treatment for the chronic pain, or how different he would be in battle due to decreased depth perception. As a disabled author, I have personally touched on the experience of gaining a disability later in life, and how he copes with it. Now, not all of y'all can do that. But that is a personal experience I do have, and it is something I have highlighted in my own work. So, while I couldn't tell you the ins and outs of having a burn scar or a prosthetic arm, I could describe the shock and frustration that comes with suddenly experiencing difficulties, or even being unable to do what you had done before.

I ask that, if you are willing to do better, or to start on the right foot, you take what I have written, reflect on it, and treat disabled characters, and in turn, disabled people, better from here on out.

Fiction is not reality, but the way we deal with it is reflective of who we are and what we believe. The boundary for our own personal being does not suddenly stop within fiction. When we interact and interpret it and create for it, it is integral that we remain conscious that bigotry runs rampant, albeit often as an unseen force, within fandom spaces, and do our best to counteract that.

I have doubts that the new eddisode will treat this topic with the same respect. I hope you can all go forward with what you have read in this WAY LONGER than I expected essay, and do what those grown British men cannot. Even if they erase it, retconn it, or do not treat it with respect, let's all go forward and do better!

As for always, you can discuss more in the tags or my inbox!

I hope you have a wonderful life,

Fish

[terrible-twst-oc-ideas]

3 Terrible Three Questions - Halloween Edition

Question 1: How do you celebrate Halloween? Do you do anything specific to celebrate?

🌰 Oh! My granny and I always used to go pumpkin picking. We’d pick out one pumpkin each, and then go home to carve them. They were never very good jack-o'-lanterns, but we had fun making them. The best part though was what we’d do with all the innards afterwards– we’d bake with them! We’d always make roasted pumpkin seeds and pumpkin nut muffins, and then pick out a new recipe to try, usually one that seemed weird. Last year, we made pumpkin pasta, and it was actually really good! I won’t be home to bake with her this year, but I am still planning to keep up the tradition while I'm at school. Granny even sent me a few recipes to try.

🎶 Not particularly. When I was still attending school in Fleur City, we’d usually participate in the Topsy-Turvy festival instead of celebrating Halloween. Our teachers would have us gather in the square and allow us to enjoy the festival at our leisure. I never liked it much – it was always too bright and chaotic – so I’d usually try to sneak off somewhere quieter. One year, I think when I was about seven or eight or so, I got it in my head that I’d simply walk all the way back to the school. I only made it to Noble Bell College’s main street when I was found and promptly returned to my teachers by one of the students, who’d recognized my school uniform. I didn’t appreciate it at the time, but it probably saved me a lot of trouble…

🏹 Well, when I was younger, I used to compete with all the neighborhood kids at trick-or-treating. None of us would ever play fair, but that was part of the game – we’d all find the sneakiest way to collect as much candy as possible without getting caught cheating. Like, if you just bought bags of candy from the store or got it from your house, you’d get caught for being too obvious, and same for saving candy from previous years or holidays. I always had a winning strategy, though: I’d start early, get my brother to trick or treat with me for double the candy, and have him drive me around to different neighborhoods for maximum candy-age. It definitely worked every time.

Question 2: Do you enjoy horror media?

🎶 I don’t like horror movies, but I do appreciate a gothic horror novel every now and then, especially in the colder months. The idea of exploring an old, secret-filled castle or mansion has always stirred up my imagination, ever since I was a kid listening to my hometown’s old legends… It's admittedly my favorite thing about living in my dorm.

🏹 Uh, yeah, of course! I’m a horror movie champ. I can watch any of those movies no prob, and totally don’t get scared and wanna hide behind my brother or anything… I’ve never understood why he likes all those movies so much…

🌰 Um… no. Horror’s admittedly not my thing. Though, I might entertain seeing a horror movie on a date. The idea of cuddling a partner during a scary scene does have a particular romance to it...

Question 3: Do you usually dress up for Halloween? If so, what are you going as this year?

🏹 Yup! And this year, I'm going as a chimera! Been planning the costume since August, and I’ve already got all the stuff for it. It’s totally gonna wipe the socks off of the judges of the school’s costume contest this year.

🌰 I do enjoy dressing up when I can, usually in something elegant. This year, I’m planning on going as a ghost prince. I found this lovely sparkly white suit on clearance at the formal wear store in town, and I can’t wait to wear it.

🎶 No, but that hasn’t stopped Delano from trying to get me to wear something. He even went out of his way to buy me this vampire costume that... does have a particular classical and gothic quality to it… hmm. I think I'll probably end up humoring him and wear it, just so it doesn’t go to waste.