#I can’t REMEMBER THE DETAILS UGH

[cashewally-sarcastic]

grabbing past me and shaking them WHY DIDNT YOU WRITE DOWN YOUR WORLDBUILDING

[abbyshands]

finger sucking w/nerdy!gf abby

warnings; finger sucking (obv), implied (ish?) gagging, talk of a strap-on but not used, abby refers to the strap-on as her dick, strap-on is referred to as her dick

a/n; i've had this idea non stoppp ugh so i had to get a lil drabble out :3 and thank you SO much for all the love on my first fic, i'm so honored <3 if you have any ideas you want me to do a drabble/fic for, plspls lmk!

└── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──┘

god, most days you just can’t shut those pretty lips of yours, not around her, anyway. your girlfriend is serious in regards to her college classes: doesn’t miss a single homework assignment, spends at least an hour every evening on her work, and the library is her home away from her dorm.

and you, of course.

abby anderson wasn’t sure what to look out for when she began to fall for one of the most well known girls on campus. seriously, you were like one of those girls out of the movies: popular, pretty girl, cheer team, flawless persona. everyone loved you, including herself.

you were a nice girl, but that mouth of yours was a killer. abby wasn’t just your girlfriend, but your best friend, and you told her every little detail about every little thing you did. rambling and rambling, you’d probably go for hours if she didn’t stop you.

in general, abby didn’t mind that, because it wasn’t that she wanted to feel like you weren’t being heard by her. she did care, and she did want to hear you out. but it’s when you began to do it when she was busy with her work, that it became a bit of a problem.

and even if it doesn’t seem like she is on the surface, the raging dom in your nerd of a girlfriend just can��t help but take care of it.

she had had it with the rambling for this evening. you were perched in her lap, rattling off every single thing wrong with how cheer had gone today. some girl had messed up her form, which made an issue for you and the girls on your team, etc, etc, etc.

god, did abby love you, but, fuck, did you need to shut up every once in a while.

one second, you’re speaking, babbling away. but before you even know it, your open lips are getting pushed past by abby’s index and ring, which get shoved knuckle-deep into the back of your throat. “hush, baby,” abbys commands.

your eyes widen in surprise, eyebrows raising as you let out a small, “mmph!” and whimper. what the hell had she done that for? you hadn’t even been misbehaving! so then, you find yourself grumbling, giving abby a confused look, face hot.

abby obviously doesn’t feel like explaining. when does she ever? she could care less about your opinion when it came to things like this. just take what she gives you. she shushes you, not giving a care in the world how curious you are for her reasoning. “shhh. suck, baby, suck,” she said firmly.

you didn’t want to listen at first. you were in the middle of speaking, for god’s sake, and you wanted to finish what you were saying. but you were a simple woman, and this was just like every other time you had sucked abby’s fingers: your body was physically relaxing, calming as every word you’d been saying before leaves your head.

and then your head was on abby’s chest, eyes closed, and hands in your lap as you sucked her fingers like a baby. “mhm,” abby coos, knowing full well how easy you were. it was such a simple task, shutting you up, that is. “good girl. so cute like this, princess.”

“mmm,” you let out softly, cuddling into her closer, if that’s even possible. you can’t even remember to get mad at her, or ask her why she was shushing you like this. if it means her fingers in your mouth, you don’t give a fuck. abby can’t help but chuckle, her other hand on your hips.

“there you go. such a pretty baby. you suck so well for me, doll,” abby whispers. the way she says it makes your mind flash with all the times she’s made you suck on her strap, giving you words of praise as you did it, because that’s what a good girl deserves.

“you know i love hearing you, baby, but i’ve gotta focus now, okay?” abby says in a tone that sends butterflies down to your abdomen, and maybe somewhere lower, too. you do what you can to nod, sucking abby’s fingers like a pacifier as she cradles you like a baby.

abby smiles down at that pretty, fucked-out look on your face, even when she hasn’t done much at all to you, and goes on. “maybe if you behave, i’ll let you suck my dick a little later, yeah? that sound fair to you?”

it’s like she can read your mind. of course it does, you like the sound of it a bit too much. so you nod once more.

it’s a win-win, really. she got to have her peace, and you got to feel better by sucking on her fingers. and just then, abby thrust her fingers deeper into your mouth, letting you curl your tongue around them as you moan.

“promise you if you’re good for me, i’ll give you all my attention when i’m done with my work. just keep being good, n’ sucking me, okay?” abby asks, moving her free hand from your hip back to her homework. you miss the feeling, but you know how abby feels In regards to her classes, her homework, school in general. so you nod.

“mhm,” you murmur, lips around abby’s fingers. but abby pulls them back, your own drool covering them when she does, and you whimper at the loss. god, she was just playing with you now.

“say it,” she says firmly, the kind of tone you know she only uses when she’s not playing around.

but then again, when is she ever?

“i- i will, abby,” you say in response, giving her those sweet puppy-dog eyes of yours, begging her to give you her fingers back. she smiles.

“that’s a good girl.”

so as she’s doing her work, she’s sitting in her chair, you cradled in her lap with her fingers deep inside your mouth, bouncing you up and down on her lap to keep you calm. it’s almost fucking childish, but, fuck, does it give you butterflies.

and once she’s done with her work, she pulls her fingers from your lips, covered in your spit and all. that’s when she kisses you, slow and sloppy, giving you all the attention that your plump lips are so badly craving. she finds the way you take her glasses off to kiss her adorable, because it shows just how needy you are.

and to reward you for being so good for her, she’ll have you sit up in her lap, thighs on both sides of it, and use those same drool drenched fingers to finger you, letting you ride her up and down like the good girl you are. you think of that “later” she promised you, mouth wrapped around her dick as you suck her off, and that only drives you even crazier as you’re riding your gf <3

[theemporium]

Your cocktail idea is so good! Can you do a violet fluff for Max verstappen with prompt "How do you always know exactly what I need?" "I pay attention." ? I feel like max would def be the person to remember absolutely every little detail about someone he cares for🥲

thank you for requesting!🫶🏽

3. "How do you always know exactly what I need?" "I pay attention."

.

“Hey, babe, do you know where that dress of mine is?”

Max frowned a little as he reached to pause his game, pulling his headphones off to rest around his neck before he turned to see where you were standing by the doorway, looking a bit frazzled and stressed out. 

“What?” He asked, his brows furrowing in concern as you rubbed your hands over your face before letting out a groan. 

“Ugh, that stupid blue dress that I love,” you groaned as you rounded the living room, towards the SIM set up he had in the corner. “The one you got me from Mexico, remember? I was thinking of wearing that to that coworker’s fancy dinner thing this weekend but I can’t find it anymore. I swear I saw it just the other day but I’ve been looking for hours and I can’t find it.” 

“The one with the strings on the back?” Max questioned, watching as you nodded solemnly. “Oh, I sent that to the dry cleaners with my suits last week.” 

You blinked. “What?” 

“I sent it last week when I told you I was getting all of my suits dry cleaned,” Max repeated with a casual shrug of his shoulders. “You said the other day that you were thinking of wearing that one.” 

Your eyes softened. “And you remembered?” 

“Yeah, of course,” he murmured with a small frown. “It’s that coworker you hate, no? You said you wanted to wear a dress that you felt comfortable in and knew you looked good in. You always say the blue one is your favourite too, so I sent it off.” 

“You are not real,” you murmured fondly. 

“You also said to Victoria that you love wearing that silver bag with it so I put it on the top shelf of my wardrobe so the cats wouldn’t get to it,” Max added as a passing thought. “Knowing Sassy, she will have a sixth sense that you’ll need it that day and rip it to pieces.” 

“How do you always know exactly what I need?” You questioned, shaking your head in disbelief. 

“I pay attention,” Max shrugged. 

“I love you,” you breathed out before leaning down to press a smacking kiss on his cheek. “Like, a stupid amount.”

Max snorted but happily accepted your affection. “I love you a stupid amount, too.” 

“Glad it’s reciprocated,” you murmured, nuzzling your face against his neck as he pulled you down onto his lap, the game long forgotten by now. 

“I was also thinking you could take one of my cars too,” Max added with a cheeky smile. “As a proper fuck you to your coworker.” 

You sighed happily. “You are literally perfect, Max Verstappen.” 

He beamed back in response.

.

[pucksandpower]

What Happens in Vegas

Max Verstappen x Red Bull driver!Reader

Summary: the morning after the Las Vegas Grand Prix, you wake up with one new wedding ring and zero clue about what happened … or who your husband is

You wake up with a pounding headache, the sunlight filtering through the curtains feeling like daggers in your eyes. Groaning, you roll over and glance at the clock on the nightstand.

12:37 pm.

Far later than you would normally sleep, but given the circumstances, not entirely surprising.

The night before was the Las Vegas Grand Prix and things had gotten a little out of hand afterwards. Okay, more like a lot out of hand.

The details are fuzzy but you vaguely recall dancing on a table at some point and did someone get pushed into the hotel fountain?

Ugh. You make a mental note to apologize to whoever ended up taking an unexpected late-night swim last night.

Sitting up slowly, you rub your temples, trying to ease the jackhammer currently going off in your head. Getting blackout drunk maybe wasn’t the most professional move, but hey, what happens in Vegas and all that.

You stumble into the bathroom, turning on the faucet and splashing some cold water on your face. As you reach for a towel, the glint of metal on your left hand makes you pause.

No. It can’t be.

But there it is, a simple gold band around your ring finger.

A wedding ring.

Your wedding ring, apparently.

“What the hell?” You mutter, staring at your reflection in disbelief.

You rack your brain, trying desperately to remember what happened last night. But it’s no use, the details are lost in an alcohol-induced haze.

You married someone last night. In Vegas. While ridiculously drunk.

This is bad. Really bad.

Your career, your reputation, everything is on the line here. Who knows what kind of scandal this could cause if word got out? You need to figure out who you married and do damage control, fast.

Taking a deep breath, you try to calm the rising panic. Freaking out won’t solve anything right now. You need answers and sitting here panicking won’t get you any. Time to do some investigating.

You quickly throw on some clothes and head downstairs to the hotel lobby. The drivers had agreed to meet for brunch today before getting thoroughly wasted last night. Maybe one of them knows something.

As you step out of the elevator, you immediately spot a group of your friends chatting in the lobby. Max, Charles, Lando … the usual suspects.

Lando is the first to spot you. “Well good morning, Mrs. Lando Norris,” he says with a cheeky grin.

You freeze. No way. There’s no way you married Lando. The kid is like a little brother to you. An obnoxious, hyperactive little brother. But Lando just laughs at your stunned expression.

“Kidding! You should see your face right now,” he giggles. Little punk. But at least that rules out Lando as your surprise husband.

You roll your eyes and shove Lando playfully before turning to the others. “So, crazy night last night, huh?” You say, aiming for nonchalance.

Max shrugs. “I mean, it’s Vegas. Things do tend to get wild.”

“Right, wild,” you echo. Time to cut to the chase. “So wild that I ended up getting married apparently.”

You hold up your left hand, wedding ring glinting in the light. The others stare at it then at each other, puzzled.

“Wait, you actually got married last night?” Charles asks incredulously.

You throw your hands up in exasperation. “Yes! And I have no idea who I married. Come on mates, you must remember something from last night that can help me figure this out.”

But their faces are blank, everyone shaking their heads. Useless, the whole lot of them.

You turn to Max, who averts his eyes, looking uncomfortable.

“Max, come on. You always know everything that happens on these nights out. Help me out here,” you plead.

Max shuffles his feet, not meeting your gaze. “I mean, it was pretty crazy. I was very drunk too,” he mumbles.

You sigh in frustration. Clearly you’re not getting anywhere with this group. You need to try someone else, someone who maybe left the party early last night.

You recall Fernando complaining about the horrible music at one point. Bingo.

“Alright, I gotta go see if I can find someone who can get me answers,” you announce. “You drunkards are no help.”

As you turn to leave, Charles calls after you, “Let us know if you find out who the unlucky guy is!” This earns snickers from Lando and Max.

You shake your head and head out to find Fernando. That Spaniard better have some useful information or there will be hell to pay.

One thing is certain, you will get to the bottom of this. You need to find out who this mystery husband is, sort out this mess, and most importantly, get this ring off your finger before the media catches wind of your drunken Vegas wedding.

This is going to be one hell of a day.

***

After leaving the unhelpful group in the lobby, you set out to find Fernando. The Spaniard has always had a keen eye for details. If anyone saw what happened last night, it would be him.

You find Fernando sitting alone at a table in the closest coffee shop, sipping an espresso. He looks irritatingly fresh-faced and put together given the wild night you all had.

“Well good morning, chiquita,” he says with a smirk as you plop down across from him. “You look like you had quite the night.”

You scowl at him. “No thanks to you. Leaving the party early again, I see.”

Fernando shrugs. “What can I say? I’m getting too old for these Vegas nights out with you crazy kids.”

You roll your eyes dramatically. “Oh yes, grandpa, you’re soooo old at 42. Anyway, I need your help figuring something out.”

You hold up your left hand, the wedding ring glinting under the lights. “Any idea how this might have ended up on my finger last night?”

Fernando raises an eyebrow, looking far too amused. “Well well, our little Y/N got married in Vegas. Who’s the lucky man?”

You huff in annoyance. “That’s what I’m trying to figure out! I don’t remember anything from last night. But I woke up this morning hungover as hell with this on my hand.” You waggle your finger for emphasis.

Fernando sits back, stroking his chin thoughtfully. “Hmm, interesting. And you say you remember nothing?”

“Nothing!” You exclaim, throwing your hands up. “Everything after the third tequila shot is a total blank. Please tell me you saw something that can help me out here.”

You give Fernando your best pleading puppy dog eyes but the Spanish driver just shakes his head.

“Sadly, I did not witness this alleged wedding. I turned in early, unlike you wild youths.”

You groan and let your head fall to the table. “This is bad, Fernando. Really bad. I could lose my seat over this if the team finds out I pulled a stunt like this. I need to figure out who I married!"

Fernando pats your head condescendingly. “There there, I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think. Your secret is safe with me.”

You peer up at him suspiciously. “Just how secret is this? The smirk on your face makes me think you know something.”

The smirk widens. “Maybe I know something, maybe I don’t. But I’m not going to spoil the surprise for you.”

“Nando!” You smack his arm as he laughs. “This isn’t funny! Just tell me who I married!”

“Nope,” he says, popping the P obnoxiously. “It is too entertaining watching you squirm.”

You let out a frustrated growl. “You’re the worst. I don’t know why I bothered asking you for help.”

“Because you love me, that’s why,” Fernando says with a cheeky wink.

You can’t help but smile a bit at that. You’ve always had a bit of a soft spot for the menace.

“Ugh fine, keep your secrets,” you concede. “I’ll figure this out without your help.”

You start to stand up but Fernando stops you. “Leaving so soon? Stay, have some breakfast with me. You’re going to need your energy today.”

Your stomach rumbles at the mention of food so you sink back down into your seat. “I guess I could eat something while I plot my next move.”

A waiter comes by and you order a massive plate of food to soak up the alcohol still swimming in your system. As you tuck into your meal, you notice Fernando watching you from across the table, looking thoughtful.

“You know,” he says. “Whoever you ended up marrying ... they are a very lucky man. Underneath this hungover mess, you have a good heart. Don’t be too hard on yourself over one wild night, eh?”

You pause mid-bite, touched by his sincerity. “Thanks, Nando. That really means a lot coming from you.”

He smiles and squeezes your hand briefly before returning to his coffee. The playful twinkle returns to his eye. “Even if you did get married like an idiot last night.”

You snort. “Wow, thanks. Way to ruin the moment there.”

Fernando shrugs, unrepentant. “What can I say? I live to annoy you, little sister.”

You finish up your meal, feeling slightly better with some food in you. As frustrating as that encounter was, at least you can count on Fernando to keep this quiet. Time to go gather more clues.

You stand and point an accusatory finger at Fernando. “This isn’t over. I will get to the bottom of this mystery marriage!”

Fernando just smiles enigmatically. “I have no doubt. Good luck, Mrs. Whatever Your New Last Name Is.”

You stick your tongue out at him maturely and flounce away. That man is infuriating. But the quest continues. Time to find the next driver on your interrogation list.

***

You decide to try your luck with Daniel next. The Aussie partied hard but he’s also a notorious gossip. Maybe he caught wind of something that can point you in the right direction.

You find Daniel lounging by the pool, sunglasses on, basking in the Vegas sun like he doesn’t have a care in the world.

So unfair.

“Hello there, sunshine,” he drawls as you walk up. “Don’t you look fresh as a daisy this fine day.”

You glare at him from behind your own sunglasses. “Stuff it, Ricciardo. I’m only here because I need information from you.”

Daniel gasps, clutching his chest dramatically. “You wound me! Here I thought we were friends.”

“We are friends,” you roll your eyes. “When you’re not being a pain in my ass.”

“A pain in that fine ass of yours? Perish the thought!”

You smack him lightly upside the head and he chuckles. “Alright alright, what do you need from old mate Daniel?”

You plop down in the lounge chair next to him and hold up your left hand. “I need you to tell me anything you know or can remember about how this got on my finger last night.”

Daniel lets out a low whistle. “Well tickle me pink and call me Sheila, Y/N’s gone and got herself hitched in Vegas!”

You shush him frantically. “Keep your voice down! The last thing I need is for this to get out.”

Looking far too delighted by the situation, Daniel leans in conspiratorially. “Right, top secret and all that. Who’s the lucky fella then?”

You sigh. “That’s what I’m trying to figure out. Everything after we moved on to OMNIA is a total blackout. Please tell me you know something.”

Daniel taps his chin thoughtfully. “Let me think here ... I may have some recollection of the night’s events.”

You perk up. “Yes? Go on then, tell me!”

“I do seem to remember ...” he pauses theatrically, “... that I was your very own ring bearer for the occasion!”

Your face falls. “Seriously? That’s all you’ve got?”

Daniel grins cheekily. “What can I say, it was a beautiful ceremony. I was truly honored to be part of it.”

You smack his arm. “You’re no help at all! Come on, I’m desperate here.”

Daniel laughs and puts up his hands. “Alright, alright, I’m just having a bit of fun with ya. Truth is, I was as pissed as the rest of you lot last night. Don’t remember much myself.”

You sigh. Of course it wouldn’t be that easy.

Daniel must take pity on your crestfallen face because he places a hand on your shoulder. “Chin up, Y/N. So you got a little wild in Vegas, it happens. I’m sure you’ll get it all sorted out.”

You nod but can’t keep the worry from your face. “I know, it’s just ... this could really screw things up if anyone finds out. I don’t even know who I married!”

“Well then it’s a good thing you’ve got the Honey Badger on the case!” He proclaims cheerfully. “I may not have the details but I’ll sniff around and ask some questions on the down low.”

You smile gratefully. “I appreciate that. Hopefully someone around here knows something.”

Daniel pops to his feet and offers you a hand. “Too right! Now come on, up you get. Let’s go scrounge up some greasy food and hair of the dog for that hangover, eh?”

You let Daniel pull you to your feet, feeling bolstered by his positivity.

As you head towards the sports bar in search of a burger and fries, Daniel slings an arm around your shoulder. “Cheer up! This’ll make for one hell of a story someday. It might even become a Grill The Grid trivia question.”

Despite everything, you have to laugh. Trust Daniel to look for the bright side.

But you still can’t ignore the uneasy feeling in your stomach. You married someone last night. For real. It’s not just some random hookup you can laugh off. There’s a living, breathing person out there who you pledged your life to and you don’t even know their name.

What kind of person did drunk Y/N choose as a life partner? Are they worried about this too? Or are they some opportunistic sleaze looking to take advantage of you?

You shake your head, realizing Daniel is watching you with a quizzical look. No use speculating. Just keep searching for answers, one driver at a time.

***

After saying goodbye to Daniel, you set off in search of Lewis. As the life of every party, surely he has to know the details of your wild night.

You eventually track him down just outside the hotel, walking his beloved bulldog. Lewis grins when he sees you approaching.

“Ah the bride awakens at last! We were wondering when you’d emerge,” he says with a chuckle.

You roll your eyes. “News sure travels fast. I’m guessing Nando blabbed?”

Lewis shakes his head. “When you have an impromptu wedding in the middle of a rager in Vegas, people are going to talk.”

You wince, dreading how far word of this has already spread. But that’s a problem for later. Right now, you need information.

“About that ...” you say. “I don’t suppose you happen to know who I ended up marrying last night?”

Lewis’ grin widens. “Now what kind of best man would I be if I spilled the beans?”

You stare at him in shock. “Best man? You were there?”

“But of course!” Lewis declares. “Had to lend my impeccable fashion sense for your dress. Pulled some strings with a stylist I know and got you all hooked up last minute.”

Your mind is reeling. You got married in an actual wedding dress? This just gets worse and worse.

You wrack your brain trying to picture it. But you have zero memory of any dress. Lewis must read the confusion on your face.

“Don’t worry, I had it safely delivered to your room after you started taking it off in the middle of the club. Though I’m guessing you were in no state to keep track of it,” he chuckles.

You shake your head, still stunned. “I didn’t see any dress in my room. What did you do with it?”

Lewis taps his chin. “You know, I did pop in this morning to check on you but you were still passed out cold. So I had the dress boxed up and sent off to be preserved and framed as a gift.”

He crouches down to scratch Roscoe behind the ears. “That’s from me and this good boy right here. Couldn’t let such a work of art go to waste!”

You’re touched in spite of yourself. “That’s really sweet, thank you. But I would really rather just know who I married right now.”

Lewis stands back up and wags his finger. “Ah ah ah, where’s the fun in that? This is the most entertainment we’ve had all season!”

You groan as Lewis laughs. “Come on, Lew. Have mercy and put me out of my misery here.”

But Lewis just zips his mouth. “My lips are sealed! Don’t you worry though, he’s a great guy. You’ve got my stamp of approval.”

You cross your arms in frustration. Of course Lewis would drag this out like a sitcom. But his clue gives you pause.

“He’s a great guy,” Lewis said. So your mystery spouse is someone Lewis personally knows and actually approves of. That narrows it down a bit.

Lewis gives you an apologetic smile and checks his watch. “I’d best be off. But don’t worry, you’ll figure this out!” He tosses a wink over his shoulder as he saunters away with Roscoe in tow.

You watch them go, mind spinning.

Lewis doesn’t just compliment anyone. So apparently drunk Y/N didn’t marry a total disaster. That’s something at least.

You absently twist the wedding band around your finger. You wish you could remember anything about him, about what happened between you.

Did you have a beautiful ceremony? Exchange heartfelt vows? Share a magical first dance as spouses?

You shake your head ruefully. If so, what a shame not to remember any of it. Here’s hoping that this “great guy” turns out to be someone who can make you fall in love all over again ...

***

You decide on a new approach — find the person who actually married you and your husband last night. Whoever officiated the ceremony must know the identity of your mystery groom.

The only problem is, you have no idea who that could be. It’s not like Vegas chapels employ actual priests or judges to perform marriages. It was probably just some random person licensed to perform marriages.

You start making the rounds of the chapels on the Strip, showing your ring and asking if anyone remembers you coming in during the night. But you have no luck — most of the chapels you try to check in with aren’t even open yet, catering to the drunk impulsive crowd that comes out after dark.

After hours of fruitless searching, you plop down on a bench in front of the Venetian, racking your brain for what to try next.

A group of women in matching Bride Tribe shirts walk by, laughing and chatting in that way only tipsy daytime bachelorettes can.

One of them pauses as they pass and calls out to you. “Hey hun, you look down. Guy trouble?” She gestures to your ring.

You debate waving her off but then reconsider. Maybe a bachelorette party would know their way around the Vegas wedding scene.

“Yeah, you could say that,” you reply. “I’m trying to find the person who married me last night but it was a bit of a ... wild impromptu thing. I don’t even know where it happened.”

The women gasp excitedly. “Oh my god, a drunk Vegas wedding? That’s epic!” Says the one in the rhinestoned Bride To Be sash.

“Epic disaster more like,” you mutter but can’t help smiling. Their enthusiasm is infectious.

The bride puts her arm around you. “Don’t worry sweetie, we’ll help you sort this out! I know all the best chapels.” She turns to her posse. “Ladies, let’s help her track down her mystery hubby!”

You find yourself swept up in the bachelorettes’ mission to assist you. After barraging you with questions about the wedding (“Please tell me you at least had a cute dress?” “Oooh was it Elvis themed?”), they decide that the most likely chapel was The Little Vegas Wedding Chapel off the north end of the Strip.

You all pile into their pink party bus and soon pull up at the aforementioned chapel. The receptionist greets you with a smile. “Welcome ladies! Who’s the lucky bride today?”

The girls nudge you forward. You clear your throat awkwardly. “Well actually, I’m trying to find out if I was a bride here last night.” You show her your ring. “I don’t remember much but I know I got married. I was hoping you might have a record?”

The receptionist types away on her computer, then frowns. “Hmm doesn’t look like we had any late night weddings yesterday. Our last was at 10 pm.”

You sigh but thank her anyway. So much for that idea. At least the bachelorettes are still upbeat as you climb back on their bus.

“No luck there but it was still a fun adventure!” The bride-to-be seems to have all the enthusiasm in the world.

You nod, grateful for their attempts to help. As the bus starts moving, the bride gasps.

“Wait, girls, I think I know where we need to go!” She turns to you excitedly. “There’s this little all-night chapel down on Fremont Street. Our friend Val got married there on a total whim a few years ago and she said it was fabulous!”

A chorus of squeals greets this news. You aren’t sure this is a solid lead, but hey, it’s not like you have any better ideas.

“Alright, let’s give it a shot!”

Twenty minutes later you’re climbing out of the bus in front of a small chapel with a neon 24 Hour Weddings sign. Taking a deep breath, you push through the door into the kitschy Vegas-themed space.

At the front counter is an older man in an Elvis costume that must be at least a size too small. Bingo. You hurry over and show him your ring.

“By any chance did you marry me and some guy last night?”

The Elvis impersonator peers at you for a moment before his face lights up in recognition. “Well slap me sideways, you’re the lovely lady I helped get hitched last night! What a shindig that was!”

Your heart leaps. Finally a lead! “Yes that was me! Do you by chance have a record of who I married?”

Elvis frowns. “You mean you don’t remember the young fella? He was real handsome, said some mighty sweet vows if I recall correctly.”

You shake your head in frustration. So close and yet so far.

Elvis pats your arm. “No worries darling, old Elvis remembers. I gotcha hitched to ...”

You lean forward eagerly as Elvis taps his chin, racking his memory.

“Now let’s see ... young fella you married. He was oh ... a bit taller than you I’d say. Had one of them European accents — German, Swedish, or somethin’ like that. Brown hair I think. A pretty good lookin’ chap. Dressed real sharp too.”

Your heart sinks as Elvis delivers the extremely vague description. Brown hair and a little over your height? Well that only narrows it down to about half of the paddock!

You groan and smack your forehead in frustration. So close! Elvis gives you an apologetic look.

“Aw shucks, wish I could tell ya more little lady. But I was croonin’ so many love songs last night that all you couples started to blend together.”

You force a smile, knowing he did try his best. “That’s alright, I appreciate you checking for me.”

Back outside, you fill in the eager bachelorettes on Elvis’ less than helpful clues. Their excitement deflates a bit.

“Dang, that could be like, anyone!” One says, voicing your thoughts exactly.

The bride-to-be squeezes your shoulder. “Don’t worry hun, we’ll keep thinking! Your mystery man is out there somewhere.”

You give her a grateful hug. “Thanks ladies, for all your help today. I should probably get back to my hotel and keep investigating.”

The gaggle of girls walks you back to the bus, firing off more wild theories about your potential groom.

“Oooh what if it’s that sexy Spanish driver … Alfonso?” Suggests the bridesmaid named Amy.

“It’s Alonso,” you correct with a laugh. She may be way off but you appreciate the enthusiasm.

As you say goodbye to your new friends, your mind is spinning once again. So Elvis confirmed this wedding really happened, though his clues weren’t particularly enlightening.

But he did say one thing — whoever you married gave sweet vows. So apparently in your drunken state, you picked someone who could be sincere and romantic.

That has to count for something, right?

You glance down at the wedding ring on your finger, the physical reminder of the huge secret you’re unraveling. Did you really promise to spend your life with someone here of all places? And do they plan on holding you to that promise?

Your gut twists with anxiety but also a trace of curiosity. Who is this mystery man who can make drunken Elvis shed a sentimental tear?

Whoever he is, you’re going to find him.

***

Exhausted after a day of fruitless searching, you decide to head back to your hotel to regroup. You slump down onto one of the plush couches in the crowded lobby, mind still spinning over the bizarre situation you’ve found yourself in.

Who exactly did you end up pledging eternal devotion to in your drunken stupor last night? So far your quest to unravel this mystery marriage has led nowhere.

But you can’t rest yet. You need answers.

As you sit there contemplating your next move, your phone starts blowing up with Twitter notifications. You blink in surprise. Must be big news dropping for this much activity.

You open the app and nearly swallow your tongue when you see the top trending hashtag: #Y/NMaxWedding.

Your stomach drops to your feet.

No no no, this cannot be happening!

But with a sense of impending doom, you click on the hashtag. Immediately you see the bombshell that has sent your world into a tailspin.

It’s a tweet from a fan account, featuring photos they somehow obtained of a Clark County Nevada marriage certificate between you ... and Max Verstappen. Your teammate.

You stare slack-jawed at the images of the official document signed by you and Max as spouses, clear as day. Your drunken Vegas escapade isn’t a secret anymore. It’s public record, blasted all over social media.

Numb with shock, you scroll through countless tweets analyzing, freaking out over, and cracking jokes about you and Max’s surprise nuptials. Some fans are outraged. Others seem delighted at this bombshell gossip.

You groan, head in your hands. This is an absolute disaster. What was merely a drunken mistake is now immortalized online. There’s no hiding it or hoping it will blow over quietly.

You married Max freaking Verstappen in Vegas. The sometimes arrogant and standoffish but always crazy talented driver you’re teammates with. No wonder he was acting so squirrelly this morning when you asked about the wedding.

Some logical part of your brain knows you need to talk to Max, start figuring out what to do for damage control. But the overwhelmed emotional side just wants to crawl under a rock and hide.

In a daze, you make your way up to your suite. Once inside, you toss your phone onto the bed, not even bothering to read the likely hundreds of texts blowing it up. You are in no state of mind to talk to your manager or team right now.

Collapsing onto the couch, you stare blankly at the wall, feeling numb. Despite all your investigating, a part of you still hoped that maybe it wasn’t real. Maybe the ring and certificate were just part of some elaborate prank.

But there’s no denying it now. You’re well and truly married to Max Verstappen.

A hysterical laugh bubbles out of you. Of all the drivers, of course you had end up with him. Max, your fiercest rival, constantly pushing you to be better. The teammate who drives you crazy but also loves to compete with you and rile you up.

God, your friends are never going to let you live this down. Married to Max. It’s like some cheesy fanfiction brought to life.

You glance over at your silent phone. The logical part of your brain knows you need to call him. You’re going to have to talk about this and figure out what the hell to do next.

But the overwhelmed part wants to put that conversation off indefinitely. You need time to process the bombshell that just upended your life before you can face Max.

Your inner debate is interrupted by a knock at your door. You freeze. No doubt it’s the Red Bull PR team come to scold you or paparazzi looking for a comment on your no-longer-a-secret marriage. Well you have nothing to say to them!

“Go away!” You yell but the knocking persists. With an irritated huff, you wrench open the door, fully prepared to give whoever’s there a piece of your mind.

Instead, you come face to face with the person you least expected but probably most needed to see. Max stands in your doorway, sheepish and awkward.

For several tense beats, you just stare at each other, the weight of this life-altering moment hanging between you.

Finally Max breaks the silence. “So ... quite a day, huh?” He gives an uneasy chuckle.

You continue gaping at him, stunned into silence. Max shuffles his feet, not quite meeting your eyes.

“Can I uh, come in? I think maybe we should talk.”

Wordlessly, you step aside and let him enter the suite. Max perches on the edge of an armchair while you sink onto the couch. More tense silence.

Max clears his throat. “So I’m guessing you’ve seen it?”

You nod mutely. Max sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

“Look, Y/N ... I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. But I woke up just as confused as you this morning. Wasn’t totally sure it was even real.”

He hesitates then continues softly. “You were pretty out of it last night. We all were. Getting hitched was obviously crazy but I guess it seemed fun in the moment.”

You shake your head, finding your voice at last. “This goes way beyond fun, Max! We’re married! Actually married!" Your voice edges up hysterically on the last word.

“Yes it was a ... crazy night,” Max laughs nervously.

You scoff bitterly. “That’s putting it mildly. I’d say a drunken Vegas wedding to my teammate counts as more than just crazy!"

Max winces at your tone. “Look Y/N, I’m sorry for not telling you sooner. But we were all wasted last night. I didn’t even remember at first—”

You cut him off sharply. “Well I don’t remember any of it! As far as I’m concerned, this so-called marriage never even happened.”

You begin pacing. “We need to get this annulled immediately before things get worse. It was clearly an idiotic mistake.”

Max frowns, looking hurt. “Whoa, no need to be so harsh. It may have been drunken impulse but ... maybe it was also fate.”

You stop pacing and stare at him incredulously. “Fate? Are you insane?”

He stands and steps towards you. “Hear me out. We’ve been teammates for years now. Maybe deep down we both wanted this.”

Your jaw drops open. Max keeps going.

“I know it’s crazy but what if this marriage was meant to be? We owe it to ourselves to give this a real shot before bailing.”

You gaze at him in disbelief. Is he seriously suggesting ...

“Give this a real shot?” You repeat faintly.

Max takes your hands earnestly. “Yes! We’ve always made a great team on track. Just imagine how great we would be together off track too.”

You open your mouth to argue but Max presses on. “Plus, my children need a mother.”

You yank your hands back in shock. “Children? You have kids?”

“Well, not human kids,” Max admits sheepishly. “But my cats, Jimmy and Sassy! They need a maternal influence.”

Your head spins as you try to keep up with Max’s ramblings. Is he pranking you right now?

He fixes you with his most charming smile. “Come on, wifey. Just give it a chance! We’re clearly compatible if drunk us wanted to get married.”

You stare at him like he sprouted a second head. Max gazes back hopefully. His smile really is kind of adorable ...

No! Snap out of it! This is crazy.

But he does raise some valid points. And backing out now would cause an even bigger scandal ...

You slump down onto the couch with a groan. “Fine! We’ll stay married for now. But we explain to the team it was just drunken foolishness.”

Max pumps his fist. “Yes! See, we’re already compromising with each other. It’s like we’re meant to be husband and wife!”

That finally breaks through your haze of shock. Oh god ... you have to tell Christian Horner that you married Max Verstappen.

***

You take a deep breath as you stand outside Christian’s hotel suite, arm raised to knock. “Ready for this?” You ask Max.

He grimaces. “Ready as I’ll ever be. Might as well get it over with.”

You steel your nerves and rap sharply on the door. After a moment, it swings open to reveal Christian mid-yawn.

“Y/N, Max, to what do I owe the pleasure?” He asks curiously.

You shuffle your feet, not sure how to start. “Uh, hey Christian. Max and I have something we need to discuss with you. Mind if we come in for a minute?”

Christian narrows his eyes but steps aside to let you both in. “What’s this about? I just got off a conference call with the factory team in Milton Keynes and I was finally planning to try my luck with the slots downstairs.”

You perch awkwardly on the edge of an armchair while Max stands next to you stiffly.

How do you even begin to break this kind of news to your boss?

“So Christian, funny story ...” you start lamely.

Max jumps in, deciding to just rip the bandaid off. “We got married last night.”

Christian’s eyes widen comically. For a long moment he just looks between you two like you each have three heads. Then he throws his head back and laughs heartily.

“Good one guys, you almost had me there! Trying to pull one over on your poor old team principal, very funny,” he chuckles, wiping his eyes.

You give a weak smile. “No uh, we’re actually being serious. We got married for real last night.”

Max nods. “It just sort of ... happened.”

Christian collapses onto the sectional, looking between you in shock. “This would be a great time for you to stop with the prank.”

“I’m afraid we can’t do that,” Max says solemnly. “We were drunk and it was all really quite fast ...”

“No no, this must be some kind of joke!" Christian protests, though he’s starting to look uncertain. He grabs his phone off the coffee table. “Let me just check online, there’s no way ...”

His voice trails off as he scans his phone screen, eyes going wide at the headlines. With a low groan, he collapses back into his armchair.

“It’s true? You two actually ...” He drags a hand down his face. “Please tell me this is all some elaborate hoax the internet cooked up. Please tell me that two other people named Max Verstappen and Y/N Y/L/N happened to get married in Vegas last night.”

You shake your head helplessly.

Christian drops his head into his hands with a groan. “Unbelievable. Two of my drivers running off and eloping in Vegas! The media is going to have an absolute field day with this.”

He fixes you both with a stern glare. “Do either of you have any idea the position this puts the team in? The scandal it could cause?”

You hang your head, properly chastised. Max speaks up tentatively. “We’re really sorry, Christian, it was incredibly stupid of us. But it’s done now so we just have to deal with it.”

Christian sighs heavily. “You’re not wrong. The last thing we need is more media drama so we will have to get out in front of this.”

He pauses, regarding you both shrewdly. “I don’t suppose there’s any chance you’ll pursue an annulment right away and we can pretend this never happened?”

You glance at Max, who takes your hand and shakes his head. “We’ve talked it over and want to make this work. It happened for a reason.”

Christian makes a strangled noise. “Make this work? You plan on staying married??” His voice rises in pitch, verging on hysterical.

“We want to try,” you confirm, squeezing Max’s hand.

Christian looks desperately between you two once more before his eyes roll back and he slumps over in a dead faint.

You and Max rush over in concern. “Christian!" Max taps his face urgently. “C’mon, wake up!”

After a few tense moments, Christian’s eyes flutter open. “Wha ... what happened?” He mumbles.

“You passed out when we told you we’re staying married,” you explain sheepishly.

Christian groans, covering his face with his arm. “God help me, this is a nightmare ...”

You have to bite back an inappropriate laugh. Seeing your usually unflappable team principal so flustered would be funny if the situation wasn’t so serious.

Max helps Christian sit up and hands him a glass of water. “Sorry for springing this on you. But we’re going to make the best of it.”

Christian fixes Max with a weary look. “Just promise me no more reckless surprises from you two.”

You and Max raise your right hands in unison. “We promise!”

Taking a deep breath, Christian straightens his shirt and smooths his hair, regaining his composure. “Right. Well this is certainly an unexpected development. But the show must go on.”

He adopts his usual businesslike tone. “We’ll need to draft a press release announcing this immediately and get ahead of the media cycle. No commenting publicly until we strategize.”

You both nod obediently. Christian checks his watch. “I needed to get our PR team on the phone five minutes ago. You two, order room service and lay low until you hear from me.”

He ushers you politely but firmly out the door. As it shuts behind you, you turn to Max with wide eyes. “Well ... that could’ve gone worse?”

Max winces. “I thought Christian was going to burst a blood vessel at first. But it seems he’s taking it in stride.”

You both burst into slightly hysterical laughter, the stress melting away.

Looks like you have a marriage to figure out how to actually make work.

***

One year later

You take a deep breath as you knock on the door to Christian’s office, Max by your side. It’s time to break some more big news to your team principal.

“Come in!” Christian calls.

You enter to find him sitting at his desk surrounded by the usual organized chaos of strategy plans and data analysis.

He looks up, blinking in surprise. “Y/N, Max, what brings you by?”

You glance at Max, who gives you an encouraging nod and tentative smile. Turning back to Christian, you clasp your hands together nervously.

“Hey Christian. So, remember last year in Vegas when we promised no more reckless surprises?”

Christian’s eyes narrow warily. “Yeeesss ...” he draws out.

You look at Max again who blurts out, “Well we have another surprise coming your way. You’re going to be a grandpa!”

Christian’s jaw drops. His gaze darts down to your still flat midsection then back up to your nodding, beaming faces.

“You ... you’re ...” Christian stammers, looking like all the blood has drained from his face.

You take pity and confirm it for him. “Pregnant, yes. Surprise!” You add with an awkward chuckle.

For a few long moments Christian just sits there, mouth opening and closing wordlessly like a fish. Then, his eyes roll back and he topples forward, head thunking down on his desk.

You and Max rush forward. “Uh no, I think we broke him again,” Max winces, gently shaking Christian’s shoulder.

After a few tense seconds, Christian stirs with a groan. “Oww, my head ...”

“You passed out when we told you about the baby,” you explain sheepishly.

Christian blinks blearily up at you both hovering over him anxiously. “The baby ... so it’s really true then?”

You place a hand on your stomach. “Yep! There’s going to be a little Verstappen running around in around seven and a half months.”

Despite his obvious shock, Christian manages a weak smile. “Well how about that ... we’re expanding the Red Bull family.”

Max claps him on the back. “I know it seems a bit crazy but we’re thrilled.” He squeezes your hand and smiles softly.

Christian lets out a long breath, straightening his rumpled shirt. “Well, I appreciate you both coming to me first this time. We’ll need to strategize how to share the happy news.”

You can’t resist teasing him gently. “Don’t worry, we’ll do our best to avoid making you faint again in the future.”

Christian levels a stern finger at you both. “See that you do. My heart can only take so much.” But his mock glare melts into a warm smile.

You exchange a grin with Max.

It turns out that sometimes what happens in Vegas doesn’t stay in Vegas … but neither of you is going to complain about that.

[allophonicmess]

Too Sweet

Logan Howlett x fem!Reader

Act 3

Warnings: spoilers for Deadpool & Wolverine

This is a fluff chapter. Gotta give you guys some candy after all that angst

Word count 4.1 K

Life resumed as normal after that. Or as normal as it could be when you are suddenly placed in the new timeline. Logan kept getting confused by little details that were different to the life he had lived before. Professor X ? Sure he exists but he had hair. Cyclops? Oh yeah. He was just as annoying as he remembered. Who are the fucking Avengers and what sort of rich nerd was Tony Stark? And what about Jean?

“A hot red head with the telekinetic powers?” Wade hummed, pretending to be lost in thought. “Uh, no. UNLESS! Charles used to have a beautiful flowing mane that I don’t know about. He is turning grey, you know… but it suits him. Silver fox”              

So Jean was out of the picture. That was good, right?

Logan groaned at Wade's bad joke. He shifted his focus outside, watching the landscape change from looming tall skyscrapers to even fields and trees that started changing colour with the season. It reminded him of home.

“Just to get this straight.” Logan shifted in his seat. The car that Wade had bought from the dealership had been heavily discounted and Logan now understood why. You would think it can’t get worse than the Odyssey? Oh boy, were you wrong. It was too small for 4 people, let alone 2 mutant men. He already felt sorry for whoever might have to sit in the back for whatever reason.

“Y/N has powers?” Logan asked, trying to play it cool. The whole drive had been a big Q&A.

“Yup,” Wade said with a pop. One hand on the steering wheel and the rest of him laid back in his seat.

“They call her Osmium, too?” Logan didn’t like this dependency on the wanna-be hero. But he had to make a good first impression.

“Osmimimum? Uh no. She is called Atom” Wade laughed “Don’t if she actually does stuff with atoms… It's more like…” Wade groaned as he tried to think of an example.

“She manipulates density.” Logan pointed out. They had trained together many times. But Y/n was never allowed to use her full potential with the X-men. They condemned violence and so she was often left out on mission and focused on keeping the school running.

“Ugh- I guess? She once told me in great, boring detail why ‘Atom’ is a bad superhero name for her but they kept it for the marketability. “ He shrugged “Oh! I remember that one time we stopped a child-mutant trafficking and she got mad, like REAL MAD, and then she turned this one guy into goop.” Wade nodded fondly, thinking back at that moment. “And I mean like Nickelodeon kids choice award goop, like slurpable slushy goo, like-“

“Okay, alright! I get it.” Logan groaned in annoyance. Shaking his head at Wade. He was thankful for the man’s support and friendship but god was he annoying. Constantly.

“I wish she would do that to me sometime. It’s on my ways-to-die bingo. But she keeps refusing!” Deadpool hit the wheel dramatically.

“You are disgusting,” Logan stated dryly. “The most disgusting person I ever met.”

“Don’t forget the most annoying!”

...

The decision to go back to teaching was not made out of fun or for the joy of doing it. Maybe partially, even though Logan would not openly confess so. It was made out of necessity. Living with Wade and Al became tiresome after the first few weeks. It was always the same antiques, the lack of schedule as well as a constant state of chaos that made him crave the ordered life at the school once again. He hoped that it would give him a sense of belonging. The X-men might be different here, with a few quips and details that didn’t match with his reality. But living at the school would tie him to a strict schedule and by god, he needed some structure in his life.

 But all in all, it meant home.

“Okay, peanut. Today is a big day. But I know you’ll do great and meet a lot of new friends.” Wade joked in a motherly tone as they arrived at the Mansion. “And no hair pulling or biting unless they ask for it, okay?”

“I can’t wait to be rid of you” Logan groaned as the car came to a halt. He exited the car with a low groan, stretching to lose stiffed muscles. Not having to constantly ride in Wade's joke of a car was another reason that he preferred living at Xavier’s Institution. Speaking off:

“There you are. Welcome, welcome.” Xavier rolled into the mansions yard.

“A pleasure to have you, Logan. I must say, I was very pleasantly surprised when I received your response to my inquiry.” He moved towards Logan, offering his hand for a handshake.

Logan inspected the man. He was older, in his 40s maybe. But younger than the Charles Xavier he had worked with. He sported shaggy longer hair that was starting to thin out. Soon he would need to get it trimmed to keep his professional exterior. Along with a beard that was rather spotty and seemed too reminisce of his look in the 70s. Xavier looked like a mix of the two versions that Logan got to meet during his time at the school and it made him wonder how time worked here. Events seemed to play out in different order, they didn’t happen at all or much later than seemed correct.

He shook Xavier’s hand, thanking him for the offer. “Of course. I was surprised when you contacted me.” Logan confessed. His gaze shifted towards the grand building in front of him. It was the same old English style build that he knew, with a few modern elements added here and there.

“Is it familiar to you? The school? I assume you have experienced quite a few dejá-vus since arriving here.” Charles observed Logan.

“I do. Some things are the same. Others don’t match what I know or didn’t happen at all.” He confessed. Already feeling the brother connection build, similar to the one he had with the other Charles.

“You will find your answers. I am sure of it.” Charles turned around motioning Logan to follow him inside. “I think it is best if we continue this conversation in my office.” He looked over his shoulder at Wade, who had waited in the car, listening in on the conversation.

“Oh, yeah, I’ll be on my way. You call me if you need to get picked up, Pookie!” He waved at Logan in a motherly way.

“You aren’t coming?” He asked, somewhat confused. But then he saw Charle’s face, the intense stare he gave Wade.

“Uhhh, no I technically have a house ban for no apparent reason-“

“You burned down the west wing” Charles answered dryly.

Wade clicked his tongue, “Right, okay. Yeah… But! It’s very modern now.” He chuckled weakly. “You’ll still call me up for a mission, right?” He tried to persuade the professor.

“If the mission takes place outside of my building then yes.” Charles agreed, focusing back on Logan. And leading him inside. Neither of them commented on the cheer that Wade gave as he drove off.

Being back at the school felt surprisingly good to Logan. It was like coming back from a long holiday. Most everything was the same: Students running in the hallways, playing games in the gardens and-

“Fancy seeing you here!”

Logan turned around quickly, looking for whoever addressed him. Some children were buzzing along the halls, none of them too interested in him. Then he spotted her by the stairs. Leaning onto the dark wooden rails of the gallery. The light from the window behind her illuminating her figure.

“Y/n”, he breathed.

“Hi! Charles told me that you wanted to start teaching again.” She made her way downstairs, focus shifting between not falling and keeping her gaze on him. She seemed pleasantly surprised to see him.

He turned more toward her, watching her get closer to ground level. With each step he felt his excitement grow “He contacted me, actually. Asked whether I wanted to work here…”

“Oh really? What a coincidence ”She grinned mischievously, stopping at the end of the stairs and leaning on one of the bannisters. She kept a little space between them. There might be some familiarity between them but she didn’t want to push him too far yet and give him the chance to get closer to her if he felt like it.

But Logan stayed in place: “Do you have anything to do with that?”

She smirked,  and he felt some of his charm return to him . He might be rusty but some things were just engraved in him.

“Maybe” She shrugged, smiling softly with a playful sparkle in her eyes “But I’m assuming that you won’t be teaching history, right?” Y/n teased carefully. The multiverse situation was a thing she wanted to be careful about. Wade had told her a little bit about what had happened to Logan before he transferred but she didn’t know any details.  

“No, I teach PE and defence classes. You do science, right?” He shifted his weight from one leg to the other, hoping to lose the tension in his body. He threw the tidbit of knowledge into the conversation, hoping that he was right and that the two versions of her had that much in common.

“Chemistry and Literature, yeah.” She smiled. She then looked at her watch before pointing towards another corridor with a sigh “I’d love to talk more, but I need to get to class. Maybe we could meet sometime.” She secured the book in her arms.

“Yes.” He answered with a stiff nod, his hands were getting sweaty.

They stood In awkward silence.

“Maybe over a coffee?” She asked, looking up at him, her lip curled upwards. Her look became more expecting as he watched her in silence.

 He would catch the bait she just threw, right? Scott had laughed when she asked him about what Logan had been like; What this version might be like.

 ‘He’s an asshole’ He said ‘a cocky asshole and who thinks he can charm any girl he likes’ she blushed at that comment ‘But he is into the dark, mysterious type if that is what you are after’

“Maybe”, Logan gave  cold and curtly.

He regretted his demeanor when he saw her smile slip for just a moment.

Fuck.

Her face slipped for a moment “Oh.. okay.” She huffed softly. “See you around then.” Y/n nodded quickly before running off.

...

A routine established itself after the first weeks back at the school. The work there itself was the same. Teach the children standard curricula, training them in controlling their powers and some extracurricular activities.

He would spend some evenings with the other members of Team X ,as they called themselves here. Sometimes he would meet Y/n in the hallway but he didn’t work up the courage to stop and talk to her beyond a quick ‘hello’.

What is wrong with you? You used to sweep women off their feet. She is offering herself to you at any chance and you still can’t manage to ask her out?

He sighed as he changed back into his regular clothes. The class had just ended. It was Friday, still fairly warm for October and the trees looked beautiful in all shades of red, orange and yellow.

 Would be perfect for a romantic walk… A charming, rugged man could ask a woman out for that.

“That guy died a long time ago…” He mumbled to himself. Picking up his bag and closing the locker.

He exited the gym, making his way to his room or rather apartment. Wade managed to burn down the teacher's quarters along with the kitchens and cafeteria in some wicked stunt. No one knew what happened and that was for the best, he guessed.

However, that incident resulted in a modernized reconstruction with more spacious rooms for the teachers and a communal cafeteria that students and members of Team X shared.  Great for extroverts but Logan had to pass it every time he went to his rooms, much to his dismay. To make it worse,  the communal space was separate from the hall via a glass wall, allowing for a perfect view of everyone who tried to sneak past. Which led to uncomfortable situations such as this.

“Logan!” Piotr called, waving his huge metallic arm to get the other man's attention. Logan's initial reaction was to ignore him as he had done many times with the members of his old team.

No, he wanted to do better. He needed to. It was that kind of behavior that made him spiral in the first place. So he took a deep breath and channeled all jolliness available to him after 6 hours of teaching and a generally low level of it to begin with.  He slowly made his way towards the teacher's table.

“Come, eat with us.” Piotr offered him the seat next to him on the thick wooden bench. A seat opposite of… fuck- of fucking course he was in on Wade’s plan to play matchmaker.

 “We can’t have you get scrawny, eh?” he joked.

“Not that that would be likely to occur” Y/n joked as Logan sat down. His look snapped towards her and her eyes widened in shock at what had just come out of her mouth.

A knowing, wicked grin spread across Colossus's face. That fucking asshole…

“What are we having?” Logan asked, ignoring the situation that had just occurred. He tried to keep his gaze on Piotr who was busy filling a plate with whatever was in the big metal pot on the side of the table. His eyes shifted to Y/n every so often.

“Pierogi. I am trying out new recipes for a cooking class with my students” He said proudly, placing the plate in front of Logan “Y/n said, they are very good. Right?” He asked her, putting the woman on the spot.

“Oh, uhm…yeah. I like the new… stuffing.” She said, the answer sounding more like a question, carefully looking at Logan when he tried it. She was thankful for Piotr’s brotherly demeanor and gentle nature. Yet sometimes he would tease her as any older brother liked to do. And they sure liked to do it in front of people that the younger sibling might fancy.

Logan nodded in agreement, complimenting the man for his cooking.

“You cook here regularly?” He asked with a mouthful.

“Of course! Cooking is a very important life skill. As well as baking. You should join one of Y/n’s baking classes, she is very talented.” Colossus complimented the woman, making her grin.

“I plan on holding a workshop on the weekend for older students and alumni. You should come.” She offered, a hopeful look in her eyes. Maybe she was too discrete the last time she tried to get Logan to ask her out. So this time she tried to be more direct with her offer.

“I don’t bake,” Logan answered in a backhanded comment as he continued to eat. He didn’t think too much about it. He had planned to ask her out after lunch. He was overly focused on what he would say to her once the others left to notice how he had sounded.

It only occurred to him when he saw how Y/n visibly deflated. “Oh, right” She hummed, swallowing another bite of her food, eyes looking anywhere but towards the man who had once again rejected her so swiftly.

Piotr, just sighed with disappointment, leaning back in his chair. His hard elbow bumped into Logan’s side.

You fucked it up. Again.

...

“Okay, stop. You mean to tell me that she tried to ask you out not once but TWICE and you rejected her?” Wade paced through the living room. Trying to make sense of what his friend had just told him. “You mean to tell me that you now spend 3 months at that school? Being in her proximity 24/7 and actively avoiding her?”

Logan sat on the familiar black couch that looked even more beaten up than the last time he was at the flat. With disgust, he realized that he didn’t even want to know what caused the new damage.

 “I don’t avoid her”

“Oh no? And yet the few times she does catch you creeping in the halls you manage to scare her off.” Deadpool said down one of the rotatable bar chairs. Swirling dramatically.

“No wonder the girl’s not interested in a sad drunk fuck like you,” Al commented from the table where she sat, carefully packaging her newest acquisition of sellable goods.

“ No, Al that’s the thing! The girl wants him DESPITE being a sad drunk fuck!”  Wade jumped from the chair to pace around some more. He had to come up with a plan to get the two to spend time together, and get to know each other better. Create some closeness to let the sparks fly and catch on.

“That’s even worse.” Al laughed, snoring.

“Thank you for the compliments… Reassuring.” Logan groaned, regretting to even have answered Wade when he asked him about how things were going with Y/n. Maybe he wasn’t ready to be with someone again. He liked her and wanted to get to know her but something was stopping him. The urge to protect her from danger and he still thought of himself as the greatest danger to her and his team.

“On the other hand, she is still interested after being rejected TWICE. So you still have a chance, Pookie.” Wade said, sitting down next to Logan, yet again way too close.

“I’m gonna help you, buddy, Don’t you worry.” He leaned in closer, his lips brushing Logan's ears “Act three needs some lovin’ and I make sure you get all the loving you need, baby” He whispered towards Logan. And with dread, and a bit of disgust,  Logan accepted that he had no chance of stopping the man.

...

By the time the midterms rolled around, Logan had gotten familiar with the schedule and his  profession once again. He slept better, tended to snap less at people and even his drinking tendencies seemed to get better. Being part of a community felt good and it made him angry at his younger self for rejecting the people who loved him out of some ill-placed ideology: that to keep them safe, he had to distance himself from them.

And yet you are doing it again.

He sighed as he trotted into the community kitchen. He broke his coffee maker in a fit of frustration last week and hadn’t found the time or energy to tell Charles to get a new one. He stayed out of the professor's way for the most part, not wanting to be roped into some conversation about ‘needing therapy’. So he sourced his caffeine intake from the machine that sat in the big, homely department kitchen. Another benefit was that there was always a fresh pot ready and waiting for him. Downside, there were almost always people in the kitchen, waiting for others to join in for conversation and breakfast.

This morning he should be safe from conversation. Most students and some staff went home for the fall semester break, leaving the school running on a minimal level to accommodate those who had no home to go to. There were no classes, meaning that the school apparatus calmed to a halt.

In practice that meant that almost everyone slept in with no pressure to get up early. And for Logan, that meant that he could enjoy his drink in peace before people tried to talk to him.

Lost in thought he strolled into the kitchen. It seemed empty, thank god. He sighed in relief, stretching languidly. The air exiting his lungs in a low groan.

Then a soft click sounded through the room.

A fridge being closed.

“Oh hey, you’re up early.” Y/n appeared behind the full-size fridge door that had previously shielded her from his view. She looked a little tired, not yet fully awake and a bit tousled from sleep.

Aww C’mon. Maybe Wade was right about the universe wanting them to come together. But primarily to annoy him and allow for Wade to give him the ‘I told you so’ speech.

“So are you.”  He answered, leaving on the door frame and watching her pour some creamer into her cup. Upon closer inspection, she did look younger than her other iteration. Her features were softer looking with fewer wrinkles and scars. He needed to ask her about that at some point.

She leaned onto the counter to reach for another cup, taking it out of the overhead cabinet. Proceeding to pour some coffee in it. “How do you take your coffee?” She asked, turning towards him.

“I’ll take two sugars” He answered, moving towards her with slow even steps. The threat of Wade’s ‘help’ kept looming in the back of his mind, pushing him to be more open towards her and to come out of his shell. Who knows what that maniac had in mind?

Y/n hummed in agreement, dropping in two cubes of sugar and stirring the dark liquid before handing it to Logan.

He thanked her softly, holding the porcelain with his much larger hands. He had moved quite close to her, both leaning against the kitchen counter. The closeness and difference in height between them meant that Y/n had to look up to him, to make eye contact.

With a grin he noticed how she shifted her stand, one hand bunching up the material of her cardigan.

You still got it if you let it happen, man.

They stood in comfortable silence for a moment, enjoying their drinks and watching the sun paint pictures onto the kitchen surfaces, colored by the stained glass windows.

She was the one who broke the silence. “Are you ready for the training session today?” She asked, turning towards him, shifting her position so that her hip was pressed against the counter.

“Training?” He asked confused, setting down his cup to cross his arms over his chest, the muscles shifting visibly under his skin.

That’s right! Show her what you got!

“Yes, staff training? We got the call from Washington about a mutant security threat. Charles wants us to be ready just in case. Do you read your emails?” She teased, watching him over the rim of her mug.

“I don’t know how that stuff works if I’m honest with ya.” He shrugged “Do you go on missions regularly? On Government orders?” He remembered that Xavier had mentioned something along the lines of that. Some complicated struggles between heroes about government regulation and so on.

“Yes, after the blip it was decided that an X-team force should be established to take care of mutant-related threats or endangerments.” She explained.

He had heard of that, too. “Right. What was that blip again?”

The energy in the room shifted suddenly.

Y/n huffed, almost spilling a bit of her drink. “Ha, that’s a bit of a heavy topic for morning coffee talks.” She looked around uncomfortably. Logan seems to have hit upon a heavy subject.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” He apologized quickly. Beating himself up for screwing it up once again.

“No, no it’s fine.” She shook her head, setting down her drink to cross her arms as he did. Only that she seemed to do it defensively. “Half of all life stopped existing for five years and… that left a few scars.” She explained somberly, softly nodding to herself.

Logan blinked, his mind moving at high speed to get the conversation on a good topic again. Anything to turn it around and to prevent her from having a bitter aftertaste to their first proper talk.

Yet it was her, once again, that stepped up. She noticed how he got nervous, eyes wandering, shoulders sagging.

“I’ll explain it to you later. When we are not so pressed on time.” She reached out slowly, placing her hand on his arm, squeezing it in reassurance. Y/n smiled at him softly, moving around him to exit the kitchen and prepare for the day ahead.

Without thinking Logan placed a hand over hers, just in time before she pulled hers away. It had her stop in her tracks. Her eyes moved to where his rough callused palm warmed the back of her hand, up to his eyes. He was watching her with intention.

She was nervous. This was either going to be an invitation to finally get to know him or he had enough of her and told her to stop fancying him.

“You can explain it to me on a walk to the lake? Tonight?” He asked, one eyebrow raising in question. His hand squeezed hers gently.

A second of silence followed.

She exhaled, the stress leaving her body but she had to keep her composure. A grin spread across her face “Sounds like a plan.” She held eye contact for a few beats, then let her hand slip out of his hold as she left.

That’s how you do it, Tiger!

Her lips pressed together to keep from smiling too hard as she exited the hallway.

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[loveinhawkins]

Barely ten minutes into the hike from Skull Rock to Lover’s Lake, Dustin heaves a sigh like he’s the most long suffering person in the world to ever exist. Steve rolls his eyes.

“Jesus Christ, Henderson, what?”

“I’m bored.”

“God, you’re such a whiner. No, you—you’re like a little kid on a road trip, like, are we there yet?”

Behind them, Max and Lucas snort in almost perfect unison.

Out of the corner of his eye, Steve sees Eddie’s lips twitch into the faint semblance of a smile. It’s very quick, blink and you miss it, before he turns sombre again, looking down at the forest floor. Steve can’t blame the guy; he can’t imagine that he has all that much to smile about.

“I just meant,” Dustin says, “that we could use some entertainment.” He jerks his head meaningfully at Eddie—who thankfully still has his head down so he can’t witness this tremendous lack of subtlety—and mouths, You know, a distraction.

“And I’m the entertainment guy,” Steve says flatly.

“Well, we’ve gotta keep you around for some reason,” Lucas pipes up.

Steve turns around, walks backwards so he can point warningly at him. “Thin ice, Sinclair.”

But it’s all for show, and he keeps walking backwards, pretends to trip on a tree root and narrowly avoid a pratfall. Max actually giggles at that, which is a victory in and of itself, but Eddie’s looking down at his feet.

Hmm.

“If I wanted slapstick, I would’ve called Charlie Chaplin,” Dustin says.

“He’s dead,” Max points out.

Dustin quickly draws a hand over his neck, Cut it out. Which—yeah, that’s fair. Don’t want the conversation straying into stuff that’s too close to… everything.

“So you want education instead?” Steve says. “I think I can remember how to identify, like, some trees and shit from—”

“Forget Lover’s Lake,” Dustin says, “I’m walking you straight into a retirement home.”

Steve opens his mouth, ready to play up his outrage, and then he hears a very soft chuckle from the side. Eddie.

Steve catches Dustin’s eye, winks briefly in reassurance. Nice work.

“Oh, sorry, is that not entertaining enough for you?” Steve turns so he’s front facing again, kicking a few stray twigs as he thinks. “Uh… ooh, did I tell you about the affair? At work?”

“Someone’s having an affair at Family Video?” Lucas says, sounding disgusted.

Max cackles. “The scandal! At a family establishment, no less.”

Dustin points at her. “See, this is why you should play D&D!” he says, annoyingly sing-song. “You’ve got a flair for words.”

“How about I stick my flair right up your—”

“Uh, okay,” Eddie interrupts suddenly. “I need details.”

Aha, Steve thinks, smug. Got you.

“Fire away, Munson.”

“Did someone, like, confess to you while you were ringing them up?”

Steve scoffs. “No, it was—” He cups his mouth, calls, “Hey, Rob?”

Up ahead, Robin and Nancy turn.

“What?”

“The affair shift.”

“Oh!” Robin whacks Nancy on the arm in her enthusiasm. “This is such a good one. Okay, so am I gonna be her or—?”

“No!” Steve says. “You’ve gotta be me, you can’t do her voice right.”

“Ugh, fine, fine. Wait, I need to get into character.”

Robin makes a show of ruffling her hair, and Steve doesn’t even roll his eyes, can only grin as he hears Eddie cough a much stronger laugh into his elbow.

“Nance, count us in,” Robin says.

Nancy looks a mixture of surprised and amused. It only takes a moment of hesitance before she mimes holding a slate, mouths counting down. “Action!”

And they’re off.

It’s probably so stupid, Steve thinks, to be this loud right now, but he can’t bring himself to care—not when he can hear raucous laughter from all directions: Robin captures his flustered, wide-eyed look, while he dramatically re-enacts a woman storming into the store, demanding to see her husband’s account.

And he thinks Eddie actually laughs the loudest when he gets to the reveal: that said account was full of romantic movies the married couple had never seen together.

“Not one,” Steve echoes—and not to brag, but with this delivery? Juilliard, eat your heart out. “Not. One!”

The kids dissolve into more giggles; Robin fights to stay in character as Nancy jokingly calls, “And, scene!”

And Eddie throws back his head, and laughs and laughs.

Happiness is a good look on him, Steve thinks.

They all quieten eventually, but a lightness in mood still remains, as the kids huddle off together—“Hey, shitheads, not too far!” Steve says, far from the first time—and Eddie sidles up, fleetingly knocks their shoulders together.

“Steve Harrington. Who would’ve thought it, huh?”

“Thought what?”

Steve glances over at him, suddenly struck by the fact that the sun will go down soon; and he doesn’t really need to know what Mordor is to know that he’d rather not get there. That he’d rather freeze time, so they could all just walk in the woods forever.

Eddie shrugs. “You’re a good storyteller.” His eyes are soft, like that isn’t all that he’s saying. Like he’s saying Thank you.

Steve shrugs back. “I’m a man of many talents,” he says.

Eddie chuckles, and this time his smile doesn’t fade away.

Steve allows himself a moment or two to admire the scenery, and if that means looking less at the way the sun still shines through the gaps in the branches, and more the way that it illuminates Eddie’s lingering smile, well…

Well, so what?

Right now, we’re happy, Steve finds himself thinking.

They can stay in the Shire for a little while longer.

[seireitonin]

Dating Toby?? Like is he clingy, jealous or protective of his partner??

(I don't know....this is my first time doing these things.....)

Toby brain rot :3 this is how I see Toby mixed with some canon information! (I’m gonna try to keep it realistic)

What would it be like dating Toby?

Toby’s life is filled with tragedy

Abuse, death, murder, mental illnesses, being a slave to Slenderman

It’s all bad

So when he finds you, someone that accepts him and loves him despite all that, he’s not letting you go

He’ll do anything for you

I mean to the point it’s unhealthy

Because hes obsessed with you

Like really obsessed with you

He’s super touchy, not only because he likes to feel close to you, but it keeps him grounded

That’s important to him because his disorders/ mental illnesses cause him to hallucinate or space out

He’s not gloomy he’s actually upbeat but when he remembers something from his past or the current state of his life he goes through episodes of depression and mood swings

They can get really intense and as you’re with him you’ll learn how to support him through it

Just laying with him, making sure he has water and reminding him you’re here for him will help lots and lots of physical affection

If his mood swings get violent he’ll isolate himself from you but it’s heartbreaking to hear his suffering

His swings can go from extreme anger to intense sadness to reckless happiness

Since he hasn’t had much kindness or interaction in his life he doesn’t have the best social skills

He’ll say whatever is on his mind with no filter and that includes you too

So he’ll say mean things unintentionally a lot because he doesn’t understand how what he says can be hurtful

And he might try to call you sensitive for it too

“Ugh you’re overreacting I didn’t even say anything that hurtful. It’s just what’s on my mind”

He literally doesn’t understand how it can make you feel because he’s a bit detached with emotions

It’s gonna take a while for him to understand but he loves you so he’ll try to understand for your sake and will work on apologizing

He can also just be rude or a jerk sometimes in general

Toby likes just spending time with you to the point where you’re connected at the hip

He won’t say he loves you with words but he says it with his actions

He brings you gifts, holds your hand, goes on walks with you, holds you and try’s to be better for you (even though it’s really hard because he’s set in his ways)

He talks a lot so sometimes you’ll just listen and smile

Since he can’t feel pain, when he gets back from missions you’ll have to help him check for injuries to make sure he’s okay

He doesn’t say it but he appreciates it

Sometimes he’ll just stare at you because he loves you so much, taking in your every detail

He notices everything about you, from your body language, how you tan in the summer and lighten in the winter, he even knows how many times you breathe in a minute

Toby eats a lot of instant ramen so be prepared to eat a lot of that at first but you start to cook for him because he needs to eat better

Toby never expected to have a girlfriend since he’s a lot to handle but he liked the way you handle him

He’s full of himself literally thinks he’s gods gift to earth so sometimes he puts himself before your relationship but he’s trying to change that

He’s really funny especially if you like dark humor

He’s a jealous man. You’re his no one else’s

If someone even looks at you romantically he’ll go crazy on them

Remember, Toby is still a murderer and enjoys murdering

Chasing them down and threatening them and if it escalated kill them with a smile

He does it all for you. Everything is for you.

“You know I love you, right?”

He looks at you covered in blood

Toby likes it when you wear his sweaters

He wants a family one day and hopes you can give that to him

He’s possessive over you but does it out of intense love and obsession

He wants to keep you safe by any means necessary because he’s so used to losing the people he loves and he really doesn’t wanna lose you

Toby drives a pickup truck and likes to drive you around in it

He likes to sit in the back of it with you and look at the stars in an open field

Since Toby’s older his tics have calmed down but they’re still there and he still has the occasional tic attack

You’ll have to help him through those because sometimes he can’t even talk when he’s having one

Stuff he can squeeze, ice pack on his forehead and making sure he doesn’t hurt himself

He’s happy you don’t see him as a burden like everyone else did

He’s never letting you go

He didn’t know he could feel love this intense

[trashogram]

He Chose You (Pt. 9)

Lucifer/Reader: Lucifer chooses you to be the mother of his child. Rated Explicit.

Warning: Character Death, and minor details of childbirth.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 13.5 | Part 14 | End

“You’re glowing!”

You’d scoffed while watching as your body literally began to illuminate from the inside out.

“Well of course.” You’d snickered, looking from your hands to Lucifer. “Every mother does.” 

Your hand came up to clasp your mouth shut, but the Freudian slip was already out there. Lucifer stared at you and you stared back. 

Your lips wobbled and torso trembled until you could no longer hold it in and burst into laughter. Elation ran its course, and Lucifer joined you — laughing so hard that he slapped his knee. 

When you fell into his arms and let yourself be held, you imagined it would only be for a little while. This bizarro pregnancy had you on some kind of high, and all the worries and doubts that had been building up disappeared. 

—

You can’t remember for how long you’ve been walking but there’s discomfort in the soles of your feet. The landscape changes as soon as you truly behold it. 

The endless field of tall grass and the trees so tall they could touch the sky had been replaced by golden sand. You could feel its gentle heat on the ends of your toes. Beyond the sand is a gently rolling ocean, lilac beneath a honey gold sky as the sun has only just set. The sound of rhythmic, rushing water is so real and so close that you’re immediately calm. 

Memories flood your mind like a sneaker wave. You’re a child again, running away from the water as it laps at you. The shock of the cold water goes away quickly and you want to follow the pebbles and seashells that drift back out with the retreating tide. 

You look back, away from the sea, and see the blonde woman behind you. You grin. 

She’s wistful. 

It stamps down on your joy. The air is salty and wet blowing through your hair and inhaled through your nostrils. You want to speak, but you can’t think of a thing to say. 

“I wish this was goodbye.” Her voice carries above the waves, muffling them until they’re nothing but a dull roar. 

—

You awoke to the sensation of falling and seized in your bed. Lucifer startled beside you. He’d been sleeping wrapped around your belly; a compromise to laying perpendicular to you so that he could continue talking to the soccer-player in your stomach. 

He or she had not stopped moving since they decided to make it known that they were, in fact, not dead.

(You’d chided the baby for that, and for doubling in size in less than two week’s time, much to Lou’s amazement:

“Hell isn’t ready to be ruled by two speed demons.” You’d deadpanned.)

“Huh?” He grabbed you without thought. “What—”

Movement erupted from deep down in your core, muscles clenching and unclenching quickly, forcing you to seize again. 

“I think I’m — ugh!” You gritted your teeth. “—I’m going into labor.” 

Lucifer doesn’t do anything for a long moment. 

Then he flew into a panic before you could say ‘Jesus Christ!’. 

—

The hallway outside illuminated with the sheer brilliance of your body, literally glowing. It hadn’t stopped since it started, only a few weeks ago. Fortunately, the glow was tied to an almost paralyzing euphoria. It was the kind of delight that turned your blood into gold while racing through your body. The kind that kept you from complaining that you’d become Tinkerbell.  

“Steady. I’ve got you!” Lucifer assured whilst trudging over the carpet with you in his arms. 

An influx of pain rippled through you for the first time, providing distraction from the mortification you might’ve felt in that position. It hasn’t escaped your notice that the Prince of Darkness was a shortstack. Your brain had a hard time accepting that for as small as he appeared, Lucifer was capable of unimaginable feats of strength and endurance. 

So, you didn’t think about it. Instead you focused on breathing in and out deeply as your partner kicked at the front door of your neighbors’ apartment with the toe of his boot. 

As if waiting at the door, Warren Farrow appeared from behind the polished wood. His expression was of minute surprise, but within seconds he was turning back and calling for his wife.

Lucifer managed to pivot the two of you into the Farrow home. Warren guided you with an unusual vigor in his step, as though he were a man decades younger. 

“We’ve had it set up for weeks now, Sir.” Warren said gravely. 

Through the convulsions, you observed the inlet that Lucifer had taken you into. It was like a roomy closet, covered in tapestries and littered with candles of all shapes and colors. 

Warren’s wife was flitting about, quickly lighting the pitch-black surroundings until you could see the mere outline of things. 

You were drawn to the center of the crowded room, where a humble white cot covered in white towels contrasted everything else.

It occurred to you then that this entire pregnancy had been a shit show, not the least bit because you’d never gone to any OB. You hadn’t checked in with any hospital, or stepped foot in one — how could you? 

Therefore, any  and all “check-ups” you’d had had come from your creepy neighbors with their tea and their scrutinizing questions and their buzzard-like stares.

You’d consoled yourself throughout with the brief, semi-serious talk with Mrs. Farrow three months into gestation.

“What? Were you a midwife or something?” You asked incredulously. 

“Yes, honey.” Cass had patted your hand like you were a simpleton. “I helped deliver babies for over 15 years. I was younger than you were when I first started!” 

You had stared. ‘Oh god, how many crazy cultists are actually nurses in disguise?’

“Here we go, all set. You can lay her down here.” Cassie came over brusquely, smoothing over the wrinkles in the cot before Lucifer put you down. 

He laid you on the sheets, light as a feather, jarring as you felt your belly weigh you down. The King didn’t go far, reluctant to let go of your hand. You held on like a vice as well, gripping and squeezing with each contraction. 

You felt pinches in and around your abdomen, but the pain was… off. It came not from true agony, but the overworking of your internal organs in contrast to the pleasantness that you embodied post-glow stick phase. 

Hearing childbirth horror stories all your life, and just the horrors of raising children in general, you expected to be screaming and thrashing. 

This wasn’t as bad as some of your past periods had been. What’s worse than that, however, is the unnecessary guilt you feel for how troublesome it isn’t. 

—

Lucifer struggled to remain in one spot as the urge to pace up and down the cramped little birthing room ate at him. 

He didn’t want to leave you — not that his two hosts would dare make him, regardless of tradition — but old habits die hard. He was fidgeting, putting all his weight on one foot then the other. 

You were his exact opposite, laying placid and relaxed on the birthing bed, eyeing the little room. Microexpressions flitted across your face, some of confusion and some of hurt, but aside from your firm grasp on his hand, and the occasional grunt, you may as well have been dozing off. 

Eventually you glanced at him. 

“Do you wanna sit down?” You asked calmly. 

Lucifer tried to laugh but it came out like a strangled wheeze. “Nahhh, this is fine. I’m fine. Are you fine? I mean I know you’re not fine, but can I do something? Whatever you need, I can get it for you!” 

His rambling ends with you bopping him between the eyes teasingly. “You’re silly.” 

It’s inexplicable, but Lucifer’s mood lightened at your mellow admonishment. He meets your warm, drowsy expression with an adoring smile of his own. 

“I am.” He kissed your forehead. “You’re an angel to put up with it.” 

A too-loud rasp interrupted the soft moment of nothing but affection and kisses. Cass was standing at the foot of your cot, hands on each of your knees as she kept your legs apart. 

“Get ready, honey. You’re on your way.” She hailed. 

–

A cry split through the air and it went straight to your heart. 

You gulp down air (Lucifer mimicking you without meaning to) with sweat pouring from your hairline. The lack of pain hadn’t meant a lack of effort, and you still felt like you’d run a marathon just to pass the little being currently wailing in Mrs. Farrow’s arms. 

“It’s a girl.” Mrs. Farrow declared.

There was no attempt to hide the sidelong glance she gave Mr. Farrow. The lines and grooves on the elderly man’s face deepened until he resembled a gnarled tree trunk.

“Hmm.” Was his reply, deep baritone rolling like thunder in the tiny room. 

Vehement indignance blazed to life inside your mind when the old man looked at you, critical and disappointed. You felt like tearing him and the rest of this old, tacky room to shreds. Yet, exhaustion had planted its roots deep inside of you, and all you could do was glare at the old couple from your makeshift bed. 

‘Why does it fucking matter?’

“Gimme my kid.” You growled.

As if to piss you off further, Cass ignored you in favor of wiping the baby clean before passing her off to Lucifer. The old bat presented her to the King like she was a fallen bannerman’s sword, even curtsying while doing it. 

It was so weird that it brought you out of your anger for a second. 

Lucifer was clearly apprehensive, and his insecurity made the grand gesture stranger. He swallowed visibly, making eye contact with you when he couldn’t break away from the internal turmoil he was struggling with. 

“Bring her to me.” You demanded. Lucifer nodded vigorously, cocking a head toward you. 

It was fucking nonsensical, but at last Cass obeyed and brought you a bundle wrapped in silky black. 

The baby’s wailing tapered off as soon as she’d made contact with you. And like a child on Christmas morning, you shifted to sit up as much as you could and pry open the swaddling cloth. 

You sniffled. 

All at once, the breath caught in your throat and your eyes welled up with tears.

The newborn was as flagrant as her father in terms of skin tone and hair. She hadn’t yet opened her eyes but already you could see none other than a spitting image of Lucifer himself. Right down to the rosy apple cheeks that made up her pudgy little face. 

You were a little surprised to see that she had a nose. A little black smudge, puppy-like - anomalous like the little growths on her forehead and the itty bitty spade on the tip of her wagging tail. 

She was perfect. 

“I think she’s a Charlotte.” You manage to tear your eyes away from the miraculous hellspawn in your arms just long enough to search Lucifer’s golden gaze. “What do you think?” 

His Majesty is a whimpering mess beside you. “Y-yeah. That’s perfect.” 

Peeling the blanket back just that much more, you lean toward him. It takes a little coaxing, but sure enough Lucifer traces a delicate claw over the child’s tiny brow. 

“Hello Charlotte.” He whispered. “We’re so happy you’re here.” 

Adoration overwhelmed you, nigh on visible like the air was tinged with its color, its scent, its warmth cocooning the three of you. 

Daddy, Mommy and baby. A strange but happy little family. 

Lou embraced the two of you, hiding his face, and subsequent weeping, in the side of your neck while your baby cooed. 

The background chants of ‘Hail Princess Charlotte’ and ‘Hail King Lucifer’ were, thankfully, not enough to ruin the moment. 

Nothing could. Until. 

It doesn’t dawn on you that anything is wrong when the glow has faded. It’s only the incidental look at your fingers, with Charlotte’s tail curled around them, that freezes you. Numbness then began to crawl up your body, as if waiting for the moment that you’re brain would connect the dots. The copper scent of blood made your nostrils flare and heart hammer.

Fear clutched at you in an instant. “Take her. Take the baby.” 

Your desperate hiss and barely-there shuffle to push Charlotte into Lucifer’s arms fully had his face falling. 

“W-wai-wh-What’s happening?” He asked, panic rising. 

Mrs. Farrow is prompt, crone’s face scrunched and nose prominent as if she could sniff out the issue. She’s stood at the end of the bed, already lifting the sheets off your body before you can seek her out. 

A stiff hand appears over the covers, covered in shiny dark claret. “She’s bleedin’ too much.” 

Lucifer’s eyes blazed from where he hovered. “Why?”

The elderly woman was ready to shrug, but she stalled. Perhaps out of fear. “It happens, your Grace. Birthing a baby takes a toll on the mother, sometimes it’s too much.”

“Then why are you just standing there?”Lucifer bared his fangs, ivory in the lowlight. His eyes were a haze of vermillion, so opaque that you couldn’t find his pupils or the soul inside. “Help her!” 

The truly demonic scrape of his vocal chords frightened you, as did the sudden appearance of tusk-like horns protruding from his skull and the fire coming to life between them. His beautiful skin marred and stretched and cracked as if his form were a prison barely containing the true beast within. 

Energy crackled in the air, heat rising to blow back your hair and dry the air from your lungs like a flung-open kiln. The breath was stolen from your lungs as ivory wings shot out and overtook what little space was left in the alcove. 

Reality was literally distorting around Lucifer’s warped rage. 

Mr. Farrow, for all his reticence, reached for his wife’s shoulder from within your line of sight. 

“Lucifer.” You hissed, bearing the brunt of his inhuman stare when he turned to you. It took real energy to speak. “I need you… the baby…”

It didn’t take anymore prodding for the blond to intercept your daughter once your desperation got through to him. The Devil slowly shifted back, revealing the depth of his fear in the cloudless turn of his gaze. He met you halfway - finally - and pulled Charlotte close to his chest.

A pang of thankfulness made laughter bubble up from your diaphragm. It hurt. Everything hurt again.

“Stop. Wait.” Lucifer begged, voice turned to ice. Fragile, cracking. His natural white glow had dimmed significantly like a cooling star. “This isn’t— I promised you this wouldn’t happen! This can’t happen!”

A shudder ran through you. 

“Hey.” You lifted a hand and placed it on his pale cheek, thumb brushing over where white met red. “Nothing… for it now.” 

“No, don’t, that’s… No.” His agony was so palpable, as his fury had been. 

“You’re gonna be a great dad.” You murmured. 

Lucifer bowed over the side of the bed with Charlotte snug against him. You could feel the warmth of his breath, and then the splash of his tears against your cheek as he broke down. You felt it deep in your bones, and the lump in your throat that choked you. 

“Not without you.” He said. “I can’t do this without you.”

A pained smile was your response. Vision a-blur. Cotton tongue.�� 

“You… will.”

Lucifer shook his head fiercely. “I promised you. I swore I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. I can’t… I can’t...” 

“Please. Please don’t — ” Anguish turned Lucifer’s once melodic voice into broken notes. “Don’t leave us. Please, please, please.” 

His sobs intermingled with Charlotte’s whimpering. She fussed as she was woken from her doze by the growing, tangible urgency. You wished you could calm both of them. Take them in your arms and make it all go away, promise that you weren’t going anywhere. 

“Please. Please. Please.” The word fell from the Devil’s mouth like a prayer. 

You wondered if he really was praying. Praying to his Father. 

It broke your heart. 

The candlelight around you was getting brighter as the rest of your surroundings grew dark. Lucifer, as brilliant as he was, lingered somewhere in between. You squinted when his features began to fuse together in your mind. It did little to help, as large, dark shadows blotted out the corners of your sight. 

Charlotte was bawling and you fought to open your eyes again. You hadn’t realized they’d closed. 

You were so tired. The will to rise up and comfort your baby was dwindling. Everything had succumbed to a thin stream of light in a sea of darkness. 

With a breath, and another Herculean effort, you opened your eyes again. 

White blinded you. 

And then you were nothing.

***

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[hijackalx]

Question for Astarion, Gale, and Gortash (might be considered a headcanon ask maybe?) How would they react to seeing their sweetheart in the Wavemother's Robes?

LETS DO THIS BABEYYYY !!!!!!

GN!reader

NSFW BELOW

let’s set the scene. i’m imagining like……. a ball or a party or something 💃💃🪩

GORTASH

this man has no shame like he does not give a SHIT who is watching he will want to fuck right then and there. honestly loves showing you off so you wearing something revealing/flattering is a plus to him. ALTHOUGH he is SO obnoxious with his PDA and will be touching you all over. mostly to make everyone else jealous 🤭 you’re his arm candy for sure

he loves how the robe accentuates your shape. also the little back window omg DON’T let this man see back dimples he turns into a wild animal. he catches glimpses of your back whenever he can and always rests his hand in that spot when you’re standing together. definitely thinks about fucking you from behind while you’re wearing it

you will eventually disappear together because he couldn’t wait any longer (he has two seconds of patience). will probably fuck you over a table in a secluded room or something, throwing the back of the dress up or to the side so he can easily slip inside you. while you’re fucking he’ll tell you how everyone thinks you’re a whore or a slut for wearing something like that (endearingly)

ASTARION

SO much obvious staring. i feel like he’ll glance at your body when he knows you’ll see just to get you flustered. will also make comments like “darling, did you dress up for me?” and give soooooo much praise on how you look. LITERALLY never-ending praise. and it also progressively gets hornier LMAO you WILL feel like he wants to eat you up

OBSESSED with how it exposes your chest/stomach. and the little peeks of collarbone too UGH GOD THE COLLARBONES !!!!!!! gets turned on thinking about covering the area in hickeys/bite marks so that the next time you wear it everyone knows you’re his

he’s pretty patient with it and waits until the night is over to finally fuck you. he mostly just thinks it’s funny to get you wound up throughout the night with his dirty talk and then make you wait LMAO asshole. but anyway, when he lays you down he’s definitely going to be “scolding” YOU for teasing HIM all night 😭😭😭

GALE

MY SWEET BOY IS LITERALLY A FLUSTERED STUTTERING MESSSSS !!!!! his cheeks turn red and everything. anybody remember his reaction to you wearing haarlep’s clothes? it’s basically like that LMAO like he can’t look at you at all without thinking about all the things he wants to do to you— but that’s not very gentlemanly of him so he’s a little embarrassed by it 😹😹

he’s particularly interested in your exposed hips……… or more so how he can tell you’re not wearing underwear. he fantasizes about wrapping his arms around you from behind and slipping a hand underneath the robe to get you off with his hand/fingers

if you tease him at all or flaunt your figure because you know he’s watching his restraint will SHATTER. even if you’re in the middle of talking to someone he’s taking you by the hand to lead you somewhere private. sooo much dirty talk like he will tell you EVERY SINGLE THING he’s thought about doing to you. IN DETAIL

[reesespeanutbutterfuck]

love marks & battle scars

[rival! enemy! ken sato x baseball teammate! undercover KDF agent! reader]

part 2

part 1 | part 3

pairing: ken sato x reader

cw: rivals to lovers, enemies to lovers, eventual ANGST, cursing, hardcore!intimidating!reader, matsui’s daughter!reader, cursing, minimal details are modified to fit into the storyline, girldad!kenji, reader becomes emi’s mother figure, goofy ahhhh writing as usual

ken sato, your egotistical new teammate has been ticking you off and thinning your patience, being a threat to your place in yomiuri giants. 

ultraman, your nemesis who always gets in the way of your job in the kdf, that you only joined in hopes of finding leads and getting clues to track your parents.

and somehow you even ended up being a co-parenting his… kaiju daughter. something you never signed up for.

Ken, as Ultraman, found himself at the scene where Gigantron was, earning a few back pains from being thrown here and there like a ragdoll. Just in the middle of catching his breath, a jet flew in front of his face.

“Ultraman, surrender. Leave this to the KDF and for the nth time, stop intervening.” 

He knows that voice. Your voice. Even if you have a voice changer, he recognizes that monotonous voice from the last time he heard it in a similar scenario last night with Neronga.

“Ugh, you again? Can you lay off me?” his attention went to you.

“Not until you lay off our mission.” you replied, looking down at him under your helmet and the jet window.

After rushing to the KDF headquarters, you managed to put your gear inside and catch up with the last jet in the air force. You pulled a pilot away from the cockpit just as he was about to get on and you got on instead. Before the pilot could grumble, you flew the jet up toward the direction of the other jets but stopping by where Ultraman got thrown first. 

“Saturnine, right? Can you please, please fly a little further? Almost as if you want to kiss my face.”

“I don’t kiss bad lips. Dream on, Ultrafail.” 

He remembers you from Neronga’s attack last night. How could he not? You kept rambling violent verbal threats to him and you even almost “unintentionally” blasted him with a missile. Moreover, you wore a different uniform. He doesn’t know what you look like, because your face would always be covered, and your voice changer alters your voice along with radio distortion.

While bantering, you were distracted when Gigantron let out a loud roar before it flew away with the package. Your eyes went back to Ultraman.

“Stay out of KDF's business.” 

You followed with your jet, and so did Ultraman. You were now in front of the jets’ formation, and Ultraman’s following not that far behind. He really doesn't listen.

“If Ultraman interferes, you are authorized to use deadly force.” You heard Dr. Onda say on the radio. You ignored it and focused on catching up to Gigantron. Ultraman’s the least of your worries.

Ultraman accelerates and tries to converse with Gigantron to no avail. You can’t hear what he was saying, but you think he’s trying to convince the Kaiju to hand him the package. Ultraman’s putting himself between the KDF and Gigantron.

That little…

Now it’s time for your backup plan. Just as Dr. Onda commanded to fire the missiles, you also accelerated the speed to reach Gigantron. Ultraman thought you were about to try and wave him off again, but you had other plans. 

“What the f–” Until the pilot caught a glimpse of you through the window when you flew ahead. “Sir, Agent Saturnine appeared on the site!” 

“What?!” Dr. Onda grits his teeth, pushing one of the Computer Agents to see through the monitor cameras. “Hold fire!”

“Missiles have already fired, sir! She’s trying to turn the jet around to get in Gigantron’s way and fire from its front!”

When the KDF’s missiles almost reached Gigantron, Ultraman blocked them with his force shield. Now’s your chance.

You failed to consider a spot, Ultraman. 

Ultraman looks back and immediately recognizes you. What the hell are you– 

No.

Ken’s eyes widened from behind the mask when he realized what you were about to do but it was too late. You fired multiple missiles at the other side directly at Gigantron where Ultraman’s force shield doesn’t cover. Then came a big explosion as you hear Gigantron's loud, desperate roar and the sound of its fall from the height like an asteroid. The impact of the explosion from the other’s jets’ missiles and yours repelled your jets away miles from the explosion. Gigantron hitting the ocean surface also made a big wave upon landing.

Then the environment suddenly turned quiet. When the smoke dissipated, you tried to look down and search for the Gigantron’s whereabouts but you could not see clearly from the height. You have to retrieve that package. Even Ultraman was nowhere to be found anymore. Is he dead? In your defense, you didn’t plan to hit him with the missiles too, he was in the way, it’s his fault for meddling.

You need to find Gigantron now and complete the mission. KDF’s drones and Dr. Onda himself searched with you. Later on, after a while, you finally found Gigantron’s unresponsive body but no package to be found. Until you looked beside Gigantron and what you saw gave what it was away.

Fragments of shells.

You looked back at Gigantron’s unmoving body. You weren’t sure if it’s dead or just unconscious. But one thing’s for sure. Aoshima’s going to kill you.

And you failed your mission.

Ultrafuckingman.

—

With a sour mood, you woke up once again the following day. At your house, you sat at the tabletop chair and mindlessly poured coffee to an old, chipped rim cup. 

“No work in the morning?”

When you heard the male voice behind you, you accidentally poured your coffee into your hand and when you flinched it spilled all over everywhere from the kettle. You silently muttered a sharp ouch as you tried to soothe the scalded spot. 

The man behind you is none other than your father, the one and only baseball champion, Hideki Matsui. Skyrocketing expectations, only expecting the best from his only daughter who took the same line of work as him. As a retired athlete, he wanders around, occasionally attending interviews and reunions from his old Giants teammates. 

You sighed before you replied without turning behind to meet his eyes. 

“I got suspended.”

—

After the stunt you pulled to eliminate Gigantron, and when Dr. Onda announced that the Kaiju egg hatched, Aoshima had a word with you and suspended you for three days.

“Aoshima, if you'd just let me talk to Dr. Onda alone–”

Aoshima faced you. “Dr. Onda does not chat with his personnel. Whatever you have to say, say it in front of me, and I'll relay, Agent Saturnine.”

“I can’t. It’s a private matter. Besides, it wasn’t my fault why the mission failed. I did what I could.”

“You were there even if you’re off-duty.” Aoshima’s brows furrowed, pointing outside.

“You didn’t say I shouldn’t meddle when I’m off-duty. Clearly it was your fault for giving unclear instructions.”

Aoshima sucked air through his nose. “I’m still a rank above you. So as your Captain, do as I say. Go home and rest.” and then he walked away from you and went in the door to Dr. Onda’s office.

—

Your dad, Matsui scoffs at your revelation. “Suspended? Just what trouble did you cause in your discreet workplace? Well, you'll live with it, it’ll help you focus more on baseball. You have a whole season ahead of you.”

You winced in annoyance. “Dad–” 

“You didn’t start the game last night. Why is that? You’re always first in sequence as the right fielder.”

You gripped your coffee cup. You don’t know how to answer. He would surely have a negative reaction, but you wanted to tell him the truth about Sato.

Speaking of Sato, you researched about him last night. Kenji Sato, number 7, LA Dodgers. His stats were decent. He might be one of the best players in the Dodgers, but he's nowhere like that here. At the end of the day, stats don't matter. You want to see him in his full potential to believe in his skills. He's built quite a fanbase here in Tokyo, too. Not surprising, he was born here in Japan, anyway.

You turned your head to him. “Shimura decided it’d be great if Sato was first in the court. He’s the best player of the Dodgers back in LA.”

“I know that. He’s a threat. Don't let him be better than you. I saw him, he bats ineptly, you already have an advantage. But even if he’s not a threat to your title, he’d be a threat to the points of the team. And when there is a threat. We eliminate it.”

You want to tell him to give Sato the benefit of the doubt because it’s his first time in the team, but you chose to keep your mouth shut.

“Right.” you turned your head back to your coffee and started fidgeting with the coaster underneath.

“Make sure you maintain your place in that team. Don’t take a place less than being Captain. And do something about that Sato.” you heard him say before he went outside through the main door, not saying a word more. he didn’t even tell you where he’s going, or what time he’ll be home. 

You exhaled all the tension out and bowed your head. “Maintain your place in that team.”, yet no “You’ve worked hard enough for your place in that team.”

This is your life, you have to suck it up.

You looked at the picture frame at the side of the tabletop near the fruit basket. You picked it up and looked at your family picture. You caressed your mom’s cheek with your finger. If only… If only she were still here, maybe your dad wouldn’t be this hard on you and things would be a lot better because you don’t have to risk your life working in the KDF. 

You’d do anything to be with her again.

Arriving at the Tokyo Dome, you immediately went back to the locker rooms, avoiding your teammates and the interviewers trailing you everywhere. Where are the security guards? When you got in the locker room, they were still following you so you struggled to close the door. The pushy ones were trying to get your attention and pushing the door open. When you locked it you got pushed back upon the impact and lost your balance, resulting in you falling on your behind. You shook your head and caressed your back.

—

“Persistent, aren’t they?” you were shocked when someone offered their hand to help you up. You didn’t even notice some of your teammates were there with you inside.

Ken smiled down at you, with his hand still hanging in the air offering to help you get up. But you didn’t even gesture to reject him, you just scowled at his hand, got up by yourself, and left him hanging.

“Not into accepting help from others. Got it.” Ken withdrew his hand, and muttered to himself. He heard the other teammates’ snickers at the corner. He guesses this is what he gets for being Mr. Helpful.

One of the teammates put an arm over Ken’s shoulder and followed you with his eyes. “Hard shell to crack, isn’t she? That’s how she was always like.”

“Yeah. God knows how long we’ve been teammates, yet she always keeps herself at a distance. No one knows why.” another teammate whispers to him, careful not to be heard by you.

Ken panned in your direction, you were organizing your locker, completely uncaring about your environment. He pursed his lips before removing his teammates’ arms from his shoulder and walking back toward his own locker.

The game started not long after warm-ups. You were first in sequence. He finally saw you play and he must say, you really proved yourself worthy of your title. You were aggressive yet still seemingly holding yourself in restraint. When it was his turn to be in the court, you followed him with your eyes as he walked in. You thought he was about to redeem himself for the disappointment he was last night, but he was even more disappointing tonight. Last night it was just banter, tonight, he picked a fist-fight with the catcher from the other team. 

What the hell is he doing this time?

The fight was bad. You can’t even look at their direction or the jumbotron while the referee was holding them from each other. Shimura was humiliated. He yelled to call him off the game and told him to get a time-out. 

“The second time you do this, Sato, you’ll be kicked out by the management!” Shimura yelled at his face.

You caught a glimpse of Sato’s fuming mad face when he passed in front of you with a lowered head when he went to the exit to the back of the arena, possibly to the locker room.

You paid him no mind and instead focused on the last game. When the game finished, you didn’t bother to know anymore if your team was fined for Sato’s behavior. You were about to go back to the locker room to get your things after the game but a teammate called your last name to get your attention and told you to wait up.

When you faced him, he was holding his own ice pack to cool his neck. “You’re going to the lockers, right? Can you give Sato an ice pack to help with his face?”

“Who are you to tell me what to do? He did that to himself.” you looked at his ice pack. “Why don’t you do it yourself?” 

“Coach Shimura told us personally to tell you to deliver one to him because you’re the only one Sato doesn’t sneer at.” 

You side-eye Shimura to confirm, who has his eyes on you too to see if you’d comply. You take your own unused gel ice pack from the bench, put it in your pocket and turn your back to make your way to the locker room.

When you opened the door, you saw Ken’s topless figure sitting still on the bench in front of his open locker. You two were the only ones inside the dim locker room. He didn’t turn to the door to see who came in when the door made a sound. He can feel someone’s presence behind him, but he doesn’t know it's you. 

He felt you walking behind him, he thought it was just another teammate getting his things so he didn’t pay you any mind and just minded his own business.

You went to your own locker first at the opposite side of his. You opened your locker first to get your things before you towered behind him with your hands inside your pockets. His naked back was in full display, he was holding one side of his head in pain, and his eyes were shut. You fished the ice pack from your pocket and dropped it on the bench just beside where he was seated before you turned away.

The soft thud of the ice pack landing on the bench beside Ken shook his eyes open. His eyes first landed on your back that he immediately recognized, before it landed on the ice pack that had your name on it. 

Your steps toward the door halted when you heard his voice.

“Thanks.” Ken spoke from behind you.

He waited for you to say something, but you didn’t say anything. Except, you continued to proceed to the door.

When you opened the door, you stopped midway. Your head turned slightly to the right, to his direction.

"Stop being a burden to us. If you have any respect for this team at least, because you clearly don't have any respect towards any of your teammates, you'll either get your shit together or resign." 

And then you went forward until you were fully outside the door and left him hanging for the second time, again.

***

© reesespeanutbutterfuck 2024 don forget to support your creators by reblogging !!!

taglist (do comment if u wanna be added): @moonjellyfishie @aise-30 @lovingyeet @ririkacchi @mitski9328373 @cheomain @ultrawa

[vampyrixdarling]

I LOVED YOUR ZOMBIE SONIC WRITING HSHDJF

Okay so Sonic with a reader that he caught feelings for, right ? But the thing was, they were a big bad meanie guy out for BLOOD. They liked Sonic too, but refused to change their villainous ways tehe

IM IN LOVE Q THIS IDEA

HCs or a one shot is fine >:)))

— 「𝐒𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐜 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐡𝐨’𝐬 𝐚 𝐯𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐧」

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ MASTERLIST

╰┈➤ Sonic the Hedgehog x villain!reader

: ̗̀➛ synopsis; Sonic never could’ve predicted that he’d be falling for the same person who would actively endanger his home and his friends. But it happened. Mutual pining with slight rivalry mixed in with playful fighting, who’s to complain?

: ̗̀➛ Type; romantic headcanons

: ̗̀➛ warning(s); brief mentions of fighting (not detailed), swearing.

Likes/Reblogs are always appreciated!! <3

I’m like honestly SO embarrassed of the quality of this😭 please let this slide Orion I am BEGGING🙏🙏 my writing is normally SO MUCH BETTER I SWEAR

→ Sonic is someone who prides himself on being able to save his world from any threat that dares try to destroy it or hurt his friends or innocent people. He’s a hero, and he’s proud to call himself one. Sure, the praise and the fame that comes with it is cool and all, but all Sonic really cares about is saving all that he can, and taking down evil. He doesn’t need a reward for just doing what he loves. Hell, he’d even get to hangout with his friends just talking about the fight he had, and try some of Amy’s delicious deserts of course. Except if it was strawberry shortcake. He’d stay far away from that if he could.

→ You, on the other hand, were just another villain. You found a kind of sadistic joy in the misery of other people— a sick satisfaction from watching all those below you suffer a terrible fate at your hands. It’s always been this way for as long as you could remember, really. There wasn’t a moment you truly felt happy. No moment where you truly felt complete. And maybe, just maybe, causing pain and suffering to those undeserving made you feel just a little better about the dull, boring life you had. Something like the phrase, “if I can’t be happy, nobody can”, as much as you hated it.

→ But, nobody could deny the slight excitement you felt when the blue blur himself stood in your path, eyes locked on yours as he got ready to attack. A fight with him was never boring, that much was guaranteed. and perhaps you felt the same way, unfortunately you’d never get to finish your thought before he spin-dashed into you, sending you flying into the nearest wall.

“Ugh, come on, [Name]… haven’t we been over this once before?”

“Three times, actually. Learn to keep track.”

The hedgehog rolled his eyes as he sped towards you again. Meanwhile, with a cocky grin on your face, you shakily got up.

→ Sonic would feel extremely conflicted and confused. On one hand, you were everything he hated. Someone who felt joy in causing terror and harm upon those he cared for. But, on another hand, there was an undeniable chemistry between you guys. None of you would ever admit that, though.

→ He hated how felt this way about you. He shouldn’t feel anything like this for any of his enemies. But, there was also this one flaw about him. The fact that he’s willing to give second chances and hope for the best. He does see the good in you, no doubt about it. It’s just that you’re being so damn difficult, he wish you’d just give up.

→ But you weren’t oblivious to this. You saw how the hedgehog briefly hesitated before landing a punch to you. You saw how his eyes lit up once he realized you weren’t dead from that landing. And, a part of you felt pity for him. You realized how hard this was for him, to hurt someone he’s grown to love, and you really wished you wouldn’t care. But you did.

Because you loved him too.

→ None of you took the realization well. You both hated each other for feeling this way, and while you both tried to separate from each other, you just kept coming back. You both would swear it’s because you’re causing trouble and Sonic’s just trying to save everyone, but you both knew it was different. But one day, during a pretty heated fight..

“Why can’t you just let me do what’s best for you, [Name]?!”

“This isn’t what’s best! You don’t know anything about me!”

“I know that I love you!”

…

Oh.

Oh..

→ Once the awkwardness was out of the way, and you two were finally able to confront each other… you got it all out. You both had a talk about how you really felt. He expressed his concerns, and you voiced your clear distain towards leaving your villainous ways. Which, he understood. He hated how you refused to stop, but you just wouldn’t listen to him. So after negotiating, you agreed to slightly tone down your attacks. Which wasn’t much, but at least you weren’t killing anybody.

Bonus: He’d LOVE chasing after you and getting into so many playful fights with you while you’re attacking the town. It would be so fun and exciting for the both of you.

[ransprang]

Can I request headcanons for bg3 (basically the whole party) for the holiday seasons? (Fem aligned pronouns) Where reader was isekai'd from our world and she asks the party about holidays and is kind of bummed out theres nothing really similar to Christmas since its one of her favorite holidays. So When it gets cold out reader buys everyone a gift and wraps it with birch bark to surprise everyone? If you dont want to do the holiday thing maybe just reader who gets Isekai'd and has zero idea what to do and is really scared of everything because she has no idea whats going on?

hii thank you for the request, and have a happy holiday season!

BG3 x Christmas HCs

Astarion

looks at his Christmas gift “what in the hells is that?” “Is it poisonous or does it explode?” He just can’t fathom you’re just giving him a present. No ones ever been kind to him let alone share festive gifts. Eventually he will show up at your door naked “Is this a ‘Christmas’ enough present for you?”

He can’t stop laughing when you convince the rest of the camp to wear Christmas hats, “Clowns.” He calls them. You have to nudge him hard for him to stop ruining the festive spirit.

⁠”Is this Santa of yours a vampire? I mean..if he only comes out at night and punishes the naughty ones,” he gives you a smirk

Withers

"Ah the annual rite of gift-giving on the solstice. I do not value such material possessions but the sentiment is not lost on me." He will accept your gift but you will never see him use it.

Will show up at camp wearing a small Santa hat on his bald head. Will not answer any questions about it.

Sometimes you think if you hear him humming jingle bells but you can never make out the words because it's in some archaic dead language.

Laezel

touched your present with a stick “What is that? Are you trying to kill me?” She has a disgusted expression. Why would you spend your time getting her a gift instead of finding a solution for the parasite?

After a while of convincing, she’s ready to open it. She has a soft smile and doesn’t let it show that it actually made her warm even for a second.

After you sit her down and tell her the Christmas lore she rolls her eyes “Your kind disappoints me.” You tell her about the magic of Christmas as she smirks condescendingly “Whatever go do your thing, I’ll watch.”

Once she learns the carols and traditions there is no stopping her. She’s a woman who believes in long-standing institutes and traditions and she will uphold yours with pride too when she gets used to it.

Halsin

the way this man would hug you after receiving a gift ugh. you cannot tell me gift giving isn't one of his love languages, so he'd really really appreciate it

he keeps a very open mind while listening to you talking about Christmas and the traditions you practice. Being a druid he has his own rituals and beliefs which others judge so he is open

whittles you a wooden figurine of your favorite animal or of your pet from your world if you can describe it in detail

he would love the gift exchanging part of the tradition. he’d get everyone a gift, not as intricate as the one for you though. Maybe more so around herbs, flowers and potions

Shadowheart

"oh my, a present.. for me?" she'd be surprised that you even thought of getting her a gift

when she unwraps the gift she'd have a small smile on her face, "thank you y/n. this is very thoughtful of you. i'll remember this."

she’d be tad jealous that your beliefs are so fun. she’d lowkey wish Shar/Selune had celebrations that got people together

Gale

"A present? for me?", being locked up in his tower for so long he is quite taken aback.

"Why, where are my manners, thank you y/n. I do wish you told me about this tradition of yours. I'd have gotten you something. No matter, once we get the guests in our brains out, I'll make sure to get you something."

he'd use his magic to try and conjure up snow no matter where the party is camping

Minsc

Minsc gets very excited by whatever you get him since it's the thought that counts. "Look at what y/n got us Boo"

he sees how your eyes light up as you talk about Christmas so he gets equally excited for you

Minsc would dress up Boo in a red hat and green jacket (don’t ask how he got them)

nooooooot the best gift giver. he isn’t crafty, so he may end up making you arrows and a bow. but his smile is so big and bright that you’ll have to pretend to really like it

Wyll

He surprises you with a thoughtful gift before you can even give him one. His noble upbringing covered the strange Christmas customs of your land.

"To have you in my life is gift enough, my love. You didn't have to get me anything, your smile alone would have sufficed." Nonetheless, he accepts your gift with an elegant bow.

You both do a slow waltz to every single Christmas song you hear, no matter what the tempo or the lyrics are. You are simply too lost in each others' eyes to care.

Karlach

"Presents! For me? You're kidding!" She would run around camp like an excited toddler with her gifts. You would have to remind her to calm down so she wouldn't burn down the place.

"Thank you, soldier. I love it so much," she would grin at you. She would ask a lot of questions about Christmas and fall in love with the holiday. Gifts, food and wine, all of it would sound amazing to her after spending so many years in Avernus.

She would get really into the celebrations and her joy would be infectious. Watching her bust out her hip-hop moves during Silent Night would be the highlight of your evening.

Jaheira

"Oh, you got me a gift? How nice. See you can be kind to your elders." She would make fun of you in the moment but appreciate the gift nonetheless.

"It's not a knitted blanket for grandma, is it? I'm not ready to retire just yet."

Being a druid, she's not interested in the religious elements or traditions but joins in heartily for the eggnog and anything else booze-related.

your gifts,

admins sar, san & sav

[tizeline]

I just finished binge reading everything under your separated AU tag and I have QUESTIONS!! (that mostly just stem from me being a mikey fan) Be prepared as I will ramble.

So. My #1 burning mikey question is as follows. Why does he decide to, you know, NOT eradicate all of humanity? Does he just do it because all of his family is? Ugh it’s hard to phrase this but I’m wondering if Draxum’s word means so much to him he changes his entire world view, since draxum was the person who made him believe humans are evil, if he changed his mind he must be right? If he is the very last one to change his worldview, how does he react to the person who essentially indoctrinated him into believing humans are evil just going back on his word? Would he just, idk, try to keep going by himself (proper villain arc style!) Or does he get his own little human/outside friend to convince him, like his two other brothers do? What would happen if instead of a human/outside friend to convince him humans are okay, he gets someone like say, leatherhead, who was experimented on by the earth protection force?(Since in 2012, he was experimented on by the Kraang, but I don’t see a way of that happening when they were locked away his entire life) Huzzah for conflict! or better yet, That same leatherhead convinces him humans are okay? Though that those seem out of character…. And of course maybe it would be mondo gecko, who he befriends and then finds out was human just a few months before and still views himself as such…. So many possibilities!!

speaking of other characters, do the Drax trio have any Yōkai friends? Like one Sunita, or maybe even one yoichi usagi, per chance? Though I’m pretty sure they’d be pro-human so… idk how that would work. The question still stands.

Also, seeing as you mentioned Raph starts to hang out with Leo,Donnie and April, how does mikey react to that? Would he feel abandoned or left out? (Who am I kidding of course he would but like. It does t hurt to ask!)

And seeing as he’s alone now and he’s not training all the time (I hope) this feels like a good Segway into asking: does he have as much of a love for art as in canon? What are his and Raphs interests (since we know Leo’s!)

thanks! I love ur work and ur art and ur Au and ur mother for creating you.

P.s. I had another question I wanted to ask but I can’t for the life of me remember what it was rn so you can expect more asks from me in the near future ;)

Hoo boy, long asks mean long answers, strap in folks!

So EXACTLY what causes Mikey to change his mind on everything is something I'm still working out the details of. Draxum definitely plays a part in it, considering how much faith Mikey has in his dad, Draxum of all people changing his mind would be one of the biggest reasons for Mikey to also second guess himself. It's not like he'd instantly change his entire worldview though, after Draxum gives up on the Evil Plan, Mikey, or rather Dr. Positive, tries to motivate him to come up with a new plan for a short while. He gives up after Draxum makes it clear that they're Done™ with that, and Mikey isn't very keen on trying to do the Evil Plan all on his own considering HIS ENTIRE FAMILY decided to just give up on it. That doesn't mean he'll suddenly start liking humans, he still thinks they suck ass, he just isn't actively trying to cause their downfall anymore.

For both Leo and Raph, a big reason why they changed their minds on humanity was because they interacted with humanity and learned how wrong many of their previously held assumptions about them were. It makes sense that that's the catalyst for both of their redemption-arcs, and in that sense it also makes sense for Mikey to unlearn his prejudices against humans by interacting with them. HOWEVER! You bring up an interesting point, for Mikey specifically it would probably be more effective for another yōkai/mutant to give him a new perspective considering he'd be a lot more willing to listen to them rather than a human. I haven't been planning on including Leatherhead or Mondo, but it would be fun idea so I might do so.?That being said, getting to actually know a human later on would still be a good learning-experience for Mikey, I'm kinda tempted to bring in Woody from the IDW comics into the story too, for example.

So then we get to the topic of friends! Despite The Drax Bros growing up in yōkai society, they're still a bit isolated. They can go and hang out in The Hidden City basically whenever they want (as soon as they're old enough to do so), but when it comes to actually getting close to other yōkai and forming proper friendships...? So first of all, Draxum has a Reputation™ amongst yōkai, he's a well known figure and a lot of people are honestly a bit intimidated by him. Most yōkai thinks it's best to just stay out of his way, which includes staying out of the way of his weird kids. Basically, the bros' association with Draxum has a tendency to get in the way of them actually befriending anyone :/ Not just that, but while there are certainly yōkai who don't have the most positive feelings about humans, the Draxum family's stance on humanity is very extreme, which even most "human-critical" yōkai will find off-putting.

All of this is to say that no, they don't have a lot of friends haha. Leo hangs out at Run Of The Mill all the time, and Hueso definitely has a soft spot for him, but at most he's only acquainted with the other employees and regulars there. I'd imagine that includes Sunita, considering her dad works there and as such they've interacted on occasion. But again, Leo's extreme view on humanity makes most people uncomfortable and as such they'll mostly indulge him in civil small-talk to avoid getting on Draxum's bad side. Raph and Mikey...? They might have some casual friendly connections with some yōkai in The Hidden City, especially Mikey can be quite sociable if he can keep himself from ranting about humans for two seconds lmao. But for the most part, honestly, I think The Drax Bros are content staying a bit closed off from others outside their family. The three of them are very close and they know they can trust each other, that last part's important considering their Big Plans aren't exactly.... legal.... and as such they need to remain secretive about everything to others. I feel like they'd mostly start bothering finding new friends after they decide to abandon their Destroy All Humans Plan.

(Sidenote, I really like when Usagi shows up in TMNT stories, but I've never consumed any Usagi media myself. Almost all I know about both Miyamoto and Yuichi I know through TMNT and as such I don't feel confident enough in my knowledge about the Usagis to include either of them in the story. I HAVE been planning on reading the comics, so maybe I'll include him at a later date??)

But OH BOY Mikey's reaction to Leo and Raph starting to hang out with Donnie and April?? :D Both of Mikey's older brothers ditching him to hang out with their new little brother and his annoying human friend??? :D OH BOY YOU HAVE NO IDEA! :D

Listen, look at this from Mikey's perspective: You finally find your Long Lost Brother™ after thirteen years of him being presumed dead, great! Small problem, he's been brainwashed by the evil humans who kidnapped him and now thinks YOU'RE evil for some reason? No matter! He just needs some time to adjust! So you're patient with him, you show him kindness and understanding while gently trying to guide him back to the good side, to his REAL family. You do EVERYTHING right, and how does that bastard repay you?? HE instead turn your brothers against YOU! He ruins your plans of saving the world! Everything was PERFECT before HE showed up and started complicating things, and now your family is BROKEN and everything sucks! And it can all be blamed on Donnie.

...Hate is a very strong feeling, I don't feel like Mikey is really capable of feeling something like that, at the very least not against someone he does still technically considers family. Rather, I think the best way to describe the feeling Mikey is about to start feeling about Donnie would be bitterness. Mikey takes all the negative feelings, all the hurt and confusion about the situation he's ended up in and directs it all at Donnie. Because it all comes back to him, doesn't it? It was only after Donnie got reunited with them that things started going wrong. And from Mikey's point of view, Donnie has basically stolen Mikey's brothers from him. Needless to say, Mikey is dealing with a lot of negative emotions that he doesn't really know how to cope with them aside from taking it out on Donnie.

Donnie, who is so used to being love-bombed by Mikey is VERY flabbergasted over him basically just completely flipping a switch overnight. Mikey will just be glaring at Donnie like he's trying to explode him with his mind and Donnie's just "???who are you and what have you done with Mikey???". He starts acting really hostile towards Leo and Raph as well, it's all very weird!

Back to me not having figured out the details of the entirety of Mikey's character arc, one thing I'm contemplating is how long I wanna drag it out for. For example, I know I want to change up the events of the movie at least a bit in the AU for the sake of novelty. One way of doing that could potentially be for it to focus not on Leo's and Raph's ever growing tension in their relationship, but rather focus on Donnie's and Mikey's relationship? It'd be extra interesting if Mikey hadn't at least completely gotten over his hang-ups about humans when we bring Casey Jr into the situation. CJ looks at Mikey and sees a younger version of the man that was basically an uncle to him, like family, and Mikey looks at CJ and is just like "ew. human." and that'd be a whole dilemma to deal with. But as interesting as that could be, I'm scared that it'd just get tedious if Mikey is stuck in angst-mode for too long. We still have the entirety of season two to get through before we get to the movie, it's gonna be a while is what I'm saying. Then again, character growth takes time, maybe Mikey reconciles with his own family and starts the path to befriending Donnie by the end of season two, but they run into some roadblocks along the way. They ARE very different people, even in canon, I'd imagine it might take some time for them to properly befriend each other.

But next question - Mikey and Raph's interests! Mikey already likes to draw, but he'd definitely start doing it way more after the season 1 finale (oh wow, a healthy coping mechanism, imagine that!) Raph... Raph likes training. Even after it becomes clear that they're not doing their Big World Domination Plan anymore and as such don't really need to train as much, he still does it just because he genuinely enjoys it. He becomes proper friends with Casey the season one finale and she also really likes training, so it becomes a bonding experience for them. Leo and Donnie later on also introduces him to human media like Jupiter Jim and the Lou Jitsu movies and he gets really into it too XD Nerds!!

... Oh man, I think that's everything! Anyway, thank you, I'm glad you're enjoying the AU so much :D

[crazyoffher]

WATCHTOWER. - 2

jenna ortega x fem!reader

summary: the same late-night visitor meets with you once again, this time with a goal in mind.

warnings: unedited. somewhat long, which i'm very sorry for i just love attention-to-detail sometimes.

word count: 2600+

part one part three

Scandal was playing on the TV, but you weren’t paying attention to what was happening — not that it mattered because you replayed the show so much you could name an episode's events off the top of your head. It was a rather chilly Thursday night for springtime, and you lay on the couch all sprawled around with a massive headache and a runny nose. 

You had allergies, and they acted up harsher than usual, causing you to take the entire week off of work. You wanted to stay around in case Jenna came in that week, but you felt like fainting the first Monday, and you had been told to go home by your manager, Derek.

You were mindlessly scrolling through your phone, looking through Jenna’s entire Instagram your feed, when you were interrupted by a caller screen. It was your regular closing buddy, Jack, calling. 

“I told you, the cleaning supplies are stocked under the boxes on the shelf next to the cooler.” You sighed, assuming that he was calling because he couldn’t remember the location of where you put the items. 

“No, bro, it’s not that.” He practically screamed into the phone, erupting a groan out of you. “Keep your voice low; I have a massive fucking headache.” 

“Well, I'm sorry that I can’t contain my emotions after just dealing with Jenna Ortega, who was looking for you.” That got you to sit upright. You have to be fucking kidding me.

You sighed heavily. “You can’t be serious! Ugh.”

“What? You were expecting her? God, I hate when you keep exciting secrets from me (Y/N), like when you literally served Zendaya and I had to sit and gawk at you when you were telling me you and her had a conversation!”

Rubbing your eyeballs, you put the phone on speaker as you pulled yourself up, turning to clean up the mess of tissues and plates that had accumulated over the past two days. “What did you say to her?”

“I told her that you work Monday, Thursday, and Saturday every week, but that you’d be gone the rest of the week because you were sick. When the fuck did you meet her?” You loaded the tissues (and empty ice-cream pint) into the trash and set the plates into the sink, saying, “Two weeks ago, when you decided to do the easiest job on Earth and leave me to do all of the cleanup work, you assface.”

“Man, you better be good by Monday because she looked pretty down when I told her you weren’t here.” You sighed at that; it only made your hatred for your pollen allergy worsen. “And she told me she’d be back on Monday if she wasn’t too busy that day.”

“I’ll take this as a sign to actually start taking my antibiotics.” You filled a cup with water, grabbing a Tylenol pill for your headache. “Why haven’t you been taking them in the first place?”

“So I’d have an excuse to take more than four days off. You just have to hate working at a Michelin star that celebrities love to raid sometimes.” You downed the pill, or more so, tried to, as it came back up, making you cough.

“Yeah, well, you tell that to Marissa, who’s been covering your days. She looks like she’s on the edge of a breakdown constantly.”

You attempted to swallow the pill again, this time successfully, as you downed the entire glass of water before placing it in the sink, joining the dirty plates. “Well, she’d be more accustomed to it if she didn’t decide to work only once a week and constantly coax me for a share of my tips. Now go back to cleaning up.”

Leaning against the counter of your kitchen, you hung up the phone, saying your goodbyes to Jack. Couldn't she have come around next week?

On Monday, you returned. In your nice suitwear, you made sure to groom yourself extra well in the morning in case Jenna did make her return to you that day, and she did…not.

To say you were disappointed was an understatement; you even stayed out five minutes past twelve to see if she’d walk in, but to no avail. Closing the doors to the restaurant with Jack, you took each step to your car with a form of anger.

“Are you alr-”

“You said she was going to come today!” You huffed. He shrugged, choosing the right words to reply to you; otherwise, you’d go insane.

“If she wasn’t too busy, she said. She probably just had an overwhelming day.” He assured you, but you weren’t necessarily in a positive mood. You mimicked him, putting your hands on your face and rubbing your eyes.

“Or she just didn’t want to see me. She probably saw that I wasn’t there and was like, “Oh, well, fuck that girl then.” Ugh, I hate sickness.” Sneezing right after your sentence, Jack shuffled away from you slightly before climbing into your passenger seat when you unlocked your car.

You had promised to give him a ride because his car’s engine sounded off and he didn’t want to take it to work. “I call the music!”

“It's my car, asshole.” You jumped into the driver's seat without fighting Jack for the Bluetooth, as he had already been connected. “All I’m saying is, you shouldn’t worry. Celebrities, especially rising ones like her, are always busier than we are. Plus, you’re not all that special; I know I wouldn’t willingly go to a restaurant to see you at midnight when I’m a second away from passing out from tiredness.”

You shoved him, one hand on the wheel, as you rolled out of the parking lot and onto the immediate freeway. “And you’re so amazing?”

“I’m perfect, thank you very much.” 

It took you about thirty minutes to drop off Jack at his apartment, seeing that it was in a different town, and he made you stop at a gas station for a bag of Munchies. As soon as you fell onto your bed, you were out like a light.

When Thursday came around, you weren’t so optimistic about Jenna showing up. Actually, you debated calling out just because you didn’t feel like working that day, but you knew that your request would probably get declined because it was last-minute and it wasn’t for an emergency, so you got ready.

To your surprise, the day was calm. There were only about two well-known celebrities, and they were enthusiastically nice to you and tipped generously, leaving Jack to complain about your tips for the day, considering that he had almost half less and had a drink thrown on him by a TikTok influencer.

“Why do you always get the nicer tables with big tips while I get stuck with cows who try using their “influence” to get out of paying for their seven-fifty ($750) dollar meal?” He huffed, pretending to be busy because he was currently dealing with — actually, not even a D-lister, just somebody who was in the background of a Marvel movie in 2015.

Meanwhile, you were on your thirty minute break, munching on a burrito you had bought before walking into work that morning. “Because I’m nice and charismatic, even to those that throw their food on my clothes. You, on the other hand, have no charisma at all, and you purposefully set a bitchy tone whenever someone’s mean to you. Nobody’s tipping a man who looks to be on the verge of throwing them onto the highway.”

“Well-”

“Carlile!” Derek called out Jack’s name — or technically, last name, “Back to work, there’s a girl that came in, I’m thinking B-list but on her way to the A-list.”

“I’m dealing with some background extra right now!” He called out, buttoning up his vest he had unbuttoned earlier to breathe, and Derek came into the back where you guys were. “They wanted to leave, so Harvey gave them their check and took your tip from them while he was at it, so go and serve the girl!”

Derek left, and Jack huffed. “God, I hate that fucker. I’m getting that tip back.” And with that, he disappeared as well, anger evident in his step. You just laughed at him, twenty minutes left on your break as you laid back on the chair, tearing up the bulky burrito.

Not even five minutes later, Jack came rushing in, sweat beads on his forehead as he had a large smile on his face. “Guess who’s here.”

“Mmm, by the way you’re smiling, I’d say Spencer Charnas.”

“No, dumbass! Jenna’s here.” You coughed, choking up the burrito chunk you tried to swallow. “You’ve gotta be kidding me.” Getting up, you viewed yourself in the mirror. Your hair was messed up, tie in disarray, and your shirt sleeves slightly wrinkled from having them rolled up. You were not looking sharp.

“Yes, I told her that I’d switch her table over to you after getting her the drinks she and her — might I say, massive bodyguards, ordered. So go!”

He ushered you out of the backroom, hands on your tie fixing it into place and undoing your sleeves, fixing them down to your wrist. “I thought she was gonna come after we closed, like how she did before.”

“I guess she couldn’t wait to see you, buddy. Now you go and get your first girlfriend, yeah?” He patted your back, and you slapped him on the arm before heading into the dining section. Luckily, she was sat at the edge of a window where there was an empty walkway to her table, avoiding you of any interruptions by surrounding customers.

“What would you like to get started with?” You adjusted your vest, not making eye contact with Jenna just yet. Any observant person could tell you were nervous. “Well, hello to you too.”

You looked up, meeting her eyes and smiling. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there last Thursday, got a little sick and thought it was best to not infect everyone, especially you.” 

“It’s fine. Oh, and here.” She reached into the bag sat next to her, pulling out the book before handing it over to you, urging you to take it due to the weight of it. “Thank you. I didn’t expect you to finish so early, you said you’re busy constantly, after all.”

“I read it on the days I wasn’t all too busy, mostly on the way to meetings and in my trailer on set.” Jenna shrugged it off, adding, “And you were right, it’s a really good book.”

“Well, if you ever need any more book suggestions, I’m here. You want to get something to eat, or do you want me to come back in a bit?”

“Mmm, give me like five minutes, yeah?” She flashed you a smile that you dumbly nodded at, turning on your heel and heading into the kitchen, meeting Jack halfway there and you practically jumped on him.

“Someone’s giddy.”

“Oh, shut up. She’s making me nervous, Jack, she keeps eye contact — do you know what it’s like to hold eye contact with a pretty girl?”

“I’m assuming it’s nervewracking.”

“Oh right, I forgot. You can’t talk to girls.” You put his hand on his shoulder, sending him a fake sympathetic smile that he glared at.

“So, when are you asking her out?” Jack grabbed a couple plates, presumably for the table he was serving and you just laughed, causing him to send you a look.

You stopped upon seeing his confused glare. “Oh, you’re not joking. She doesn’t like me, I think I’d know if a girl likes me.”

“But, you wouldn’t. You’ve never had a girlfriend in your life, despite your many talking stages, all of which were online. You’re not experienced in body language, bud. Go out there and take her order, and see how it goes from there.” Leaving you standing in the busy kitchen, you thought about it.

Taking advice from Jack wasn’t the best idea, though. He dated a catfish for five months, for fuck's sake. 

Walking back into the main room, you walked over to the shelf and put the bulky navy-colored book back in it’s former place, shifting some books to slot it in. Eyeing Jenna’s table, you saw how she sat there, hands clasped together, talking to her bodyguards.

“You ready now?” You walked up to the table, hands together behind your back, and gave her a small smile.

“Yeah, I’ll have,” Jenna re-opened the menu, pinpointing her option as “Lobster ravioli with Mascovy duck breast, whatever that is.” She laughed slightly, a smile still etched on your face, and said, “And…a date with you.” She spoke lowly, as if she were purposefully lowering her voice so you couldn’t hear her.

“And a what? Sorry.” You apologized, leaning in slightly closer to hear. “A…chance to hang out with you, if you’re up for that. Other people, like friends, can be there too, of course.”

Your mouth gaped open, and the longer you took to answer, the more anxious Jenna became.

"Definitely, yeah, sure.” You managed to get out, nodding your head extensively, and Jenna’s anxiousness faded. 

You got her bodyguard's order as well, practically running to the kitchen to give your paper to a chef before scanning for Jack and watching him eat a lobster that one of the cooks seemed to have prepared for his break time. “Did you ask her out?”

“No, but she asked me to hang out with her.” To your words, Jack shot one hand up and mumbled something that you couldn’t recognize, lobster in his mouth.

“She practically wants you.” He repeated, this time more recognizable. “Yeah, yeah.” You waved him off, pacing around with your hands glued together, thinking. 

“No, think about it.” Jack set his plate down, swallowing the last bits of his lobster. “She’s busy, right? She’s got like five thousand movies coming out this year and next year, which means that she’d be making time through her busy schedule to be with you! She likes you a lot.”

You stopped, your hands transferring over to your hips. You eyed him, skeptical at first, before sighing. “You think so?”

Jack nodded. “Definitely, go get her tiger.” He pushed you away, hearing the sound of your name being called along with four plates being set off to the side.

You took the plates, setting them on a tray before balancing it on your hand, suddenly a lot more paranoid about dropping them than you’ve ever been. “Here you go.”

Bringing the tray into both your hands, you set the plates aside one by one before tucking it under your arm. “If you guys need anything else, just call me over.”

“Well,” Jenna’s voice stopped you from walking away, “In order for me to see you again, I’d need your number.”

“Right!” You said rather enthusiastically, taking her phone that she held out and typing your number in, sending her one last smile before retreating back into the kitchen.

Sadly, that was the last time you saw her that day because Harvey decided to steal your table, as he did to Jack earlier, to try and capture your tip.

“(Y/N).” Derek called out for you, walking into the room to catch you wiping up tables. “That girl you served earlier, the one that Harvey stole, told me to give your tip to you. She definitely caught on to him.” He laughed, handing you a stack of money before waving goodbye.

You gawked at the amount, five-hundred dollars as a tip was probably the biggest you ever got, and it was from a girl who, besides you, took an interest in you that she was sure to soon act on.

☟ ☟ ☟

i feel like part one was written remotely better than this part, but regardless, i hope you enjoy this :)

[fr3akingtf0utrn]

Trans Spidey reader where the reader is really into Miguel’s fangs and talons and everyone at HQ knows but Miguel (basically just sexual tension between oblivious people)

Miguel O’Hara x FTM!! Reader

Warnings: slight nsfw, def some hard tension, swearing, we stan cat claw Miguel. And remember I am German.. so poorly translated Spanish

I didn’t put a lot of detail in that reader is trans, but I feel that it’s still reassuring to know this fic has a trans reader :)) knowing that it’s about him but sorry!!

———————————————————————

“Yo, where’s your head at, mate?” Hobie hits your shoulder getting your attention. You blink from zoning out and uncross your arms.

“Uh just zoning my bad,” you say while boosting yourself back on your hands on the ledge, shoulders near your ears.

It was around lunch time at the HQ and you and Hobie were sitting on one of the ledges in the main lobby where you walk in. It was actually pretty quite since everyone is in the cafeteria, only some passing by.

“Are ye still thinking bout him, bro?” Hobie scoffs but chuckles at the same time. You roll your eyes, “kinda but it’s something else about him..” you ponder off.

Hobie rolls his eyes, “what? how he got like monster like features?” You go quiet and your eyes go wide.

“NAH MATE-!” He pushes you and fake gags. You cover your face and stand yourself up and start walking.

“Dude, I knew you liked em’ but not like that!” Hobie follows you as you guys hop down to the bridge, but you stop and he trips over you.

“wait,” you slowly turn around to him, “is it that obvious?” You frown up at him, waiting for his response.

“Yes! Bruv, you stare at him 24/7! And when you do it’s like your eyes turn to heart eyes.” He says and you groan throwing your head back while covering your face once again out of embarrassment.

“What about him interest you??” Hobie asks and you groan once again. “It’s too embarrassing,” you words slur from your hands.

He places his hand on your shoulder while walking around you. “I promise you it can’t be that bad,” hobie says and you move your hands giving him a look.

He raises his eyebrows, you look down. “His fangs and claws..” you mumble. “Huh,” hobie’s eyebrows furrow.

“His fangs and claws! Have you seen them! God I can’t there just so, ugh,” you throw your arms up.

Hobie stares wide eyed and mouth open, “lord, are you sure that’s the only thing?”

“We’ll obviously not, he’s so sweet when we’re alone. And he helps me a lot with certain things,” you say and comb your hair with your fingers.

“what kind of certain things??” Hobie smirks.

You side eye him, “your impossible to talk to.”

“If you think about it, it’s like monster fucking,” hobie says nonchalantly. You eyes went wide and jaw dropped. “You’re fucking disgusting,” you push and kick at Hobie and he stumbles.

You turn around and walk away. “Where are you going, dude?!” Hobie calls out to you. “To blow off steam!” You yell back and swing away.

“I would go find Miguel for that then, mate!” He laughs and sees you fumble a bit while swinging.

——

Your eyes barely left Miguel’s body the entire time. The thing was, you were barley listening to Miguel ramble.

He usually tended to do that when you guys were alone.

No matter what he does, he was just perfect. The way his hips swayed without realizing, giving sassy looks at others, which you found funny and cute. God, you wondered if he really did even know you liked him, you were obvious.

You were leaned against his desk, arms crossed and zoned out.

I wonder what triggers them..

how does he control them too?

most of all, I wonder how they feel…

Miguel turned towards you, “you get what I mean?” He suddenly asked.

You jumped, “uhm yeah sure.” Your head was still crowed.

He raised his eyebrow at you, “ why are you always out of it, cariño? You’ve been like this a couple days,” he asked you as he walked over to where you were.

You cleared your throat and boosted yourself up on the desk, “yeah, I’ve just been thinking..about- things?”

“Is that a question or statement?” Miguel’s eyes were on you, watching your body tense from his stare.

Miguel was utterly oblivious as well when it came to liking someone. Never noticed until someone points it out or if he gets jealous.

And, you had no idea he was literally obsessed with you. Jess had to smack the fuck out him to get his shit together and ask you out.

You let out a nervous chuckle and adjusted the neck of your suit. Miguel huffs and walks over to you. Your head was looking down at the ground, not noticing how the distance started closing until you saw big hands go on either side of your hips.

Miguel bad you trapped between his arms, his hips between your legs.

“Tell me,” he demanded. “huh,” you barely had words, ‘does this man not know notice what he’s doing?’

“Tell me what’s wrong so I can make you focus or feel better,” Miguel repeated. You bite the inside of your cheek, “okay..” you move yourself so you can reach for Miguel’s hand.

Miguel furrows his eyebrows, but continues watching, not wanting to stop you.

You grab it, admiring the pretty veins before pressing down in the middle of his palm, causing the talons to shoot out. You gasp and grin slightly.

Miguel raises his eyebrows, since he just takes his claw out on command, he didn’t know that was a way they could also show.

Your fingers graze his talons, loving the sharp edges. Miguel stares, eyes lidded looking at your mesmerized face. Suddenly, you gently drop his hand and reach up for Miguel’s face.

His eyes widen and he’s pushed up against you, your hands on his jaw.

“sorry, can I please just..?” you ask gently and Miguel nods like his hypnotized by you.

Your thumb traces his cheekbone while the other grazes his lips. Miguel’s body felt like it was on fire, being pushed up against you while your hands on him.

If you weren’t so oblivious and mesmerized by him right now, you would of felt the bulge creeping up against you, including the heat between your legs.

You lift Miguel’s upper lip, “can you show me them..please,” you ask noticing his fangs aren’t showing.

Miguel once again nods and opens his mouth, a soft sharp sound was heard and they appeared.

Your eyes shined with amazement and a slight grin. Your thumb stayed in his upper lip to get better angles of them.

Without noticing, you leaned closer and your thighs squeezed against Miguel’s hips. Miguel’s breath hitched when he felt you. His eyes swirled with red lust watching over you.

He felt special that you were so entranced by him, all your attention on him in this moment.

“..so sharp, Miguel,” you said under your breath and he felt his eyes go lidded as your other hand went to hold his hip to pull him even closer if that was possible.

You moaned as your thumb got a slight cut from his fangs, blood immediately oozing out. Miguel’s eyes widening, “..can I?” He asked.

You nodded and placed your hand that was on his face, onto his hips now. Miguel looked into your eyes as he stuck the tip of his tongue out and kitten licked the blood.

He leaned forward and placed one of his hands on your thigh, squeezing slightly with his claws.

Miguel wrapped his perfect lips around your thumb and sucked slightly, you feeling him suck the blood out. You watched with your mouth slightly open, and shifted your hips in the counter, accident brushing against him.

He grunted and released your thumb with a pop, his tongue still sticking out his mouth as he let you go.

Miguel’s claws dug into your thigh and slightly ran your hands up his body, loving how your hands fit on his snap waist.

Your hands made it to his biceps and then to his shoulders.

Miguel seemed breathless as your hands traced him, him staring into your own lidded eyes.

Your eyes flickered down to his plump brown lips, seeing the blood that dried slightly on them. You licked your own and you both leaned in slowly,

As soon as you felt his breath on you, a loud accent was heard.

“OI MIGUEL!! Can I steal Y/n?? I need him for something- oh..” Hobie stopped immediately in his tracks when he tilted his head up and saw you two connected by the hips.

Both of your heads snapped to him, staring wide eyed.

Hobie quickly turned around on his boot, he shoved his hands in his pockets, “I’ll just tell him later if guess! SORRY MATES!” Hobie yelled.

As soon as hobie was at the door he yelled, “make sure to use those fangs in bed on him, Miguel!”

“GET OUT,”

The sight was something, but that something was something that Hobie wish he didn’t see.

[blessedbucky]

we tried the world, good god, it wasn't for us! (part 1)

pairing: satosugu/reader

word count: 8k (oops)

tags: autistic!reader, autistic!satoru, suguru has depression, unplanned pregnancy, pregnant sex, vaginal sex, anal play, you and satoru are gonna rizz suguru with the 'tism, uhhh let me know if there's something else i need to add!

comments: once again it's just pure self-indulgence! we need more autistic reader inserts! and more autistic satoru! this is also posted on Ao3!

No.

Yes?

As you tap the pencil against the table irritably, you squint down at the sketchbook. You twirl the pencil around and move to erase the bottom portion of the sketch but hesitate. Did it…? Ugh! Why are you like this? You’d been so keen to soak in all the distinct details to remember those that you completely missed the basic. Did this damned cursed spirit have legs or not? The rest of it had been so floaty. Surely, it wouldn’t have any use of them. Right? Then again, the forms of curses sometimes make no sense at all.

Hmm, alright. There had been a ripped, worn cloak. Red and blue ribbons that could easily be mistaken as toilet paper to a panicked non-sorcerer. Unkempt hair and bald spots. There’d been a mask, but the curse sensed no hostility or prey, so it didn’t reveal what was underneath. You debated on calling a sorcerer in to lure the spirit in to a fight, but you don’t have the energy to deal with strangers and anyone close would snitch.

You tap on the screen of your phone, flicking away the text that you’ve already read. There is someone that could collect that curse for you…but then he would wonder why you know about the exact location in the first place. No, no. Best not to tempt fate like that. Besides, if you have to sit here and debate whether it had legs or not, isn’t that some indication that there had to be something there in the first place?

About twenty minutes later, the front door opens, and you’re finishing sharpening the colored pencils. A shame that you can’t color this particular sketch, you think as you flip back to the front, but your much less non-threatening sketch of Nue needs to be colored, anyway.

“I’m home!”

There’s a noticeable crinkle of bags that gets closer and closer to the kitchen. Many of them. Perhaps it’s your humble upbringing or it’s inherently you, but this inclination of his for spoiling you will never not fluster you. These days, you can let it slide a little more since it’s not only you that’s being spoiled anymore. Or maybe, after nearly a decade of knowing him, you understand that this is a way he communicates.

When you look over your shoulder, you can’t help but smile at the sight of him in the doorway. Sure enough, he’s loaded up with bags. Some are plastic ones from the konbini, some a little nicer and prettier, and some are outright designer bags. Those ones, you note, are not for you.

“Welcome home, Satoru.”

Satoru hesitates before he tosses all the bags away from his arms and throws himself at you with what can only be described as a manly squeal. “Waa! I have the cutest wife!” You’re prepared for a full body attack, but Satoru only plasters himself across your back, and wraps you up in his arms. He’s unbearably gentle about it. “How are my babies, hmm?” His hands flick away some pencil shavings before they rest on your belly. “Ugh, I could kill those geezers for keeping me away for so long. You’re so big now!”

You tilt your head back, deadpanning his upside-down face. “You’re so lucky that you’re married to me. I think other women would think you’re calling them fat.”

“Would they?”

“It’s like you don’t pay attention to people at all.”

“I only pay attention to the ones I like!”

You pat the tops of his hands. “I know, darling. I know.” It’s then that you notice a little something. You turn around in his arms so you can study him fully, specifically his neck. “Speaking of people you like…” Curiously, you reach up to touch the bruise just barely peeking out from under the collar of his shirt. Satoru tenses at your touch, smile faltering, but relaxes when you only ask, “Why on earth did they call for Suguru?”

“Eh. You know the protocol when there’s more than two Semi-Grade 1’s.”

Your eyes light up. “There was more than one?! How many?! What did they look like?!”

“Why yes, dearest, we’re both fine. Thank you so much for asking, dearest. Oh, no, dearest, don’t be so concerned since you’re oozing with it right now.”

You wave away the sarcasm. “Shut up. Did one of the spirits have a technique to switch bodies? Because you don’t know how much you sounded like Suguru just then.” Satoru snorts. You won’t let him interrupt your very important research. Vibrating with excitement, you spin around to snatch your sketchbook from the counter and start flipping for the next open blank page. You don’t have many pages left, though. You need a new sketchbook. “You got sweets, right? Describe the spirits while we taste-test them!”

From over your shoulder, a hand slaps down on your sketchbook so hard that you squeak. “Darling,” comes Satoru’s sing-song voice. Shit. “My most beloved Sketch,” he goes on to croon. He’s pressing you against the counter to block your escape. You wonder if you wiggle your ass if that could distract him. If he’s still got hickeys, it hasn’t been too long since Suguru fucked him, but Satoru seems like he’s having a good day, and his libido is sky-high on those days. “Mother of my child,” he stresses. “What is that?”

Oh, you’re definitely sweating now. You could try to lie…or you could play dirty. Yes. That one. You pull on the perpetuate restlessness that’s set in since you were benched and that puts tears in your eyes. Once again, you’re turning around in his arms and looking up at him.

“It was Aka Manto, Satoru!” You fist your hands in the front of his jacket. “Aka Manto!” The way that he tilts his head back and slaps a hand over his eyes means you’re successfully hitting him below the belt. “How could I resist? That would be like putting Agumon, here and in the flesh, right in front of you and expecting you to walk away!”

“Agumon?” Abort! You shouldn’t have invoked his special interest! “Okay, if I was you and I was pregnant and Greymon was the one in front of me then you’d have a case! You risked your life for an Agumon-level spirit? I don’t know whether to be mad or disappointed! You could’ve totally resisted that!”

“I couldn’t! I heard those teenagers gossiping and heard them talk about the red and blue toilet paper and all the possibilities started running through my head!” You blindly slap a hand against the sketch. “This is a good thing! I can keep myself busy with researching! I have to figure out if it’s a true vengeful cursed spirit or an imaginary vengeful cursed spirit before I register it!”

“Register?” Oh. Oh, no. You’ve done it now. “Register implies Special Grade.” You know you’re in serious trouble when he slips his blindfold off. Damn your empathy! You should’ve made sure every single light in the apartment was on before he got home! Satoru is one of the few people that you can stand eye contact with, but not so much now. You don’t want to make him angrier, though, so you look at his forehead instead to give the appearance of eye contact. “I know my super intelligent wife wouldn’t put herself alone with a Special Grade.”

“Never,” you chirp nervously. “On a totally unrelated note, did you know that those geezers are super pissed right now? They had to fork over a ridiculous amount of money to reward Mei-Mei for capturing a Special Grade. Heh…heh…”

Then, Satoru…disappears.

The sudden loss of his support makes you stumble, and you have to catch yourself on the counter. The gust of wind from his warping sends colored pencils rolling off the counter. Just as you’re crouching down to pick them up, Satoru is back, and he’s not alone.

“Oh. Hello, Sugu—”

“Talk some sense into your stupid best friend!” Satoru demands of a flustered Suguru who is trying to recover from being warped so suddenly. To everyone but Satoru, warping is jarring.

“Isn’t that you?” Both you and Suguru intone at the same time.

Satoru harrumphs before he’s stomping off to pick up all his shopping bags and leave the kitchen. Knowing him, he’s going to sit on the couch and aggressively eat his haul until he makes himself sick. This temper tantrum is starting to get under your skin, especially when you think about him getting crumbs on the couch. Just the thought of sitting on the couch and getting bombarded with them makes you want to claw at your skin already.

Suguru touches your shoulder in warning before he slips it under your arm. “Let me do that,” he insists before he helps you up on your feet. Then, he crouches down to gather up all your colored pencils, examining the ends on your behalf. He separates out the ones that will need to be re-sharpened. “What have you done now, Squid?”

“Sketch, Squid—can you two come up with cooler, more original nicknames for me?”

“Those are original,” he replies with a smirk. “You have no one to blame but yourself. It’s not my fault that you were torturing a squid spirit when we first met.”

“I was six, Suguru.”

“And have you changed at all since then, Squid?” You refuse to answer that. Suguru, though, has known you longer than anyone else. “That’s what he’s angry about, right? That’s the only reason he drags me into your fights. As if I’ve ever been able to stop you from doing what you want.”

“I have a cursed technique!” You announce loudly enough that Satoru can hear you from the couch. “Have you both forgotten that the whole point of my technique is to not be seen by spirits? I can pacify them! If I actually thought that I was in danger, I wouldn’t have gone near it!”

Suguru sighs softly before he raises up to his feet. “You know that you have a tendency for tunnel vision when you’re excited.”

“It was Aka Manto,” you whine.

“Aka Manto is Special Grade?” His nose crinkles in disgust. “Ew.”

“Just based off a preliminary search, the legend has been around since the thirties, at least. It could be longer. So, it’s had time to establish itself and accumulate power. I’m surprised it’s gone so long without being exorcised, but a spirit that haunts bathrooms is probably something that sorcerers think are beneath them—”

Suguru interrupts your hypothesizing with a finger to your lips. “This isn’t only about you anymore, okay?”

“No one cared about this before I got knocked up,” you snap.

“They did,” he sings. “You don’t want to admit it because you’re trying to be manipulative right now.” The accusation has your jaw dropping. “You’ve always been a non-combatant sorcerer, Squid. Just like Shoko, hmm? When you’re on a mission, you’re paired with an active sorcerer. Does that sound like no one caring?”

You try to dismiss the point with a snide, “They only care about me like a prized scientist, same as Shoko. I’ve dedicated all this time to studying and researching cursed spirits out in the field. I can categorize them and seal them better than any other sorcerer can.”

“The higher-ups only see you as that, but Satoru and I don’t. There are others, of course. Most of the auxiliary managers adore you. More importantly, there’s Nanamin, Shoko, Nanako, Mimiko, Tsumiki, Megumi—”

As quickly as your temper flared up, all that wind leaves your sails. “Alright, Suguru, I get it. You don’t have to keep adding salt to the wound.” You shuffle past him to plop down in a chair. “It’s just…hard.” And since you know that Satoru can and is listening to this conversation, you add, “Imagine Satoru being completely cut off from anything Digimon for nine months. This is my Digimon. Cursed spirits are my thing, y’know?”

Suguru follows after you, wrapping a hand around the back of your neck to pull you forward. You bury your face against his belly, practically purring when he starts lightly scratching his nails against your scalp. “I’m really proud of how well you’ve been dealing with all these changes. I know that is even harder. The unexpected pregnancy, the…what do Americans call it? Shotgun wedding?”

“Changes are easier when I have you and Satoru,” you mumble against his shirt.

Suguru’s hands momentarily still. “You make things so hard on me, Squid.”

“I know.”

“It’s not for the reason you think.”

“What’s the reason, then?”

“Nothing that I can talk about.” Your brows furrowing, you tilt your head up, digging your chin against his stomach hard. With how toned it is, you doubt that he can feel it. Cryptic asshole. “Why don’t I start collecting curses again, hmm? It’s safer when they’re under my control.”

“No.”

Suguru rolls his eyes. “Who is treating who like glass now? Don’t you know? I’m Special Grade sorcerer, Geto Suguru. I can handle swallowing some cursed spirits—”

“I said no.”

As if you would add to his burden like that. As if you’d add fuel to the fire. Suguru doesn’t think that you and Satoru can’t see he’s in an episode right now. If he hadn’t been forcefully called out on that mission, you aren’t sure how long he’d go on with locking himself away from the outside world. The girls help bring a piece of the world to him, keep him afloat when he blocks you and Satoru out, and give you updates on how he’s doing.

It’s a slippery slope, the curse consumption. It’s like rot. Too much and it can fester inside him. It could be something else like the loss of a student. Sometimes, it’s reminders of that fateful day during second year of high school or that night that he found the twins.

Whatever the trigger, his episode always starts the same. Sleepless nights that leave him sleeping throughout the day to make up for it, though nothing ever helps ease that overwhelming exhaustion. Teaching drains what little energy he has. Parenting doesn’t help, either, because he always tries to put on the best face that he can in front of the girls despite how much he’s fraying at the edges.

So, a normally punctual Suguru begins to be late to work. The circles under his eyes grow darker. His lack of attention can almost match Satoru’s. Conversations are forgotten, plans are dropped. It builds. It’s when he starts missing meals, not only for himself but also for the girls, that his self-loathing gets bad. They know how to cook for themselves, but you always tell them to call you or Satoru immediately if they have to do it more often in a week than not.

“I’ll deal with it,” you insist. “I need a new hobby, anyway.” You lock your arms around him, squeezing tight. “I’ve had to watch a bunch of documentaries to help me sleep. Sharks are really cool.”

“We’ll take the kids to an aquarium, then,” he whispers.

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

Your eyes meet his. “Do you mean that? Are you done ignoring me and Satoru?”

Suguru closes his eyes, sighing softly. Then, he smiles, taking being called out in stride. And, by stride, you mean simply avoiding the conversation. “Shall I bring the girls to stay the night with us?”

“Please.”

“You’re so spoiled, Squid. You’re no better than Satoru.”

“You’d be spoiled, too, if you let us.”

“I’m already spoiled enough as it is.”

“How?”

Suguru gives you one last scritch on the scalp before he steps away and calls out, “Satoru, would you like to take me home so I can pick up the girls? Do you think we should stop for Megumi and Tsumiki?”

Pregnant lady privileges give you access to the shower first.

Throughout said shower, you can hear the raised voices of competitive children and Satoru as they all have a tournament on the old 64. It’s a welcome distraction since you got so scatterbrained that you forgot to bring clothes with you and have to sneak back to your bedroom.

There’s a hoodie on your side of the bed, one that you’ve never seen. Your expression softens at the sight of it. The bag off to the side tells you that this is something Satoru bought for you, and this is also his way of reaching out after your earlier argument. It’s both an olive branch and a warning that he wants to talk, that he’ll do it in good faith, and that if his natural bluntness comes off as rude or out of pocket then it’s unintentional.

You shove your face against the hoodie after you pick it up, rubbing your face against it like a cat because the material is so soft and feels so good. It’s thin, too, so it won’t leave you sweltering since your temperature is running hotter these days. It’s two-sizes too big, so even Satoru can fit in it. You wonder how far his sweetness goes—if he got it so big so that he could wear it because he likes how it feels or because he’ll leave his scent on it for you? It’s probably both.

“Kitten.”

Keeping the hoodie pressed against your cheek, you turn your head to pout at Suguru. “You’re meaner today than usual.”

“Giving you cute nicknames is mean?”

“How is squid cute? Octopi are the cutest cephalopod.”

Suguru merely hums and leaves it at that. You don’t miss the click of the lock behind him before he saunters over to stand beside you. “Earlier, you asked me how I’m spoiled,” he starts as he drops down on the edge of the mattress. “I had an answer, but it wasn’t an appropriate time to give it.” He glances up at you from under those thick lashes, with those violet eyes, acting so damn coy. “Do you want to hear it now?”

“Does it have to do with all those hickeys on Satoru’s neck?”

“It does.” You slide between his legs spread so wide that it’s obscene. The gesture, along with reaching out to grip his shoulders, is enough to tell him that you’re okay being touched today. You think you are, but then his hands brush along the side of your bump as he’s going to place his hands on your hips, and you flinch away from the touch with your whole body. “Shit. Sorry. I read you wrong—”

You check yourself. It wasn’t so much the touch, you think, as it was the reminder that Suguru has been…avoiding you a lot more than he does Satoru. “No. Um…” You rein it back in and stop touching him. “I want to make sure I’m not reading you wrong. We haven’t…y’know…since before I got knocked up. Well, before I started showing, anyway.” You wave a hand over your bump. “If this bothers you, I can go get Satoru.”

Suguru breathes out your name. “I don’t want him right now. I want you.” His gaze darts away, looking guilty. “I’m sorry. After you made the announcement, I didn’t want to cause you more stress.”

“When have I ever held back from telling you that I’m not up to it on any given day? Isn’t that how this whole thing between us three started? For the days when my libido and Satoru’s can’t synch up?”

Jujutsu sorcerers like to fuck.

When you live your life in such a bleak and deadly world, you cope however you can. It’s mostly through smoking, drinking, and sex. You, Satoru, and Suguru are no exception. Satoru may be the worst, though, because he never really has the chance to go all-out in the field. Most of the time, if he’s not overstimulated or mentally drained, then he’s buzzing with physical and mental energy. So, when he is home, he fucks like a stallion.

In your role, you work with people a lot. You may meet with the higher-ups more often than Satoru does to report on research or answer their questions after an incident. The more stressed you are, the easier it is for you to get overstimulated, and you don’t like to be touched when the world is screaming at you from every angle.

You don’t even remember how the idea came up…

Oh, it might’ve been you and Satoru making dirty jokes about sore wrists. After you and Satoru complained to Suguru about how old touching yourselves was getting, he offered himself up. It’s a win-win, he reasoned, because he’d been on too long a dry spell that he wanted to break, and you and Satoru could get your needs taken care of without one or the other feeling guilty or having your hands or fingers falling off.

Greedy you, greedy Satoru…how could you both turn that down?

“You’ve had a lot more to worry about the past five months than sucking my dick.”

“You ever think that sucking your dick makes me worry less?”

Suguru laughs and holds out a hand. “Come here, Squid.”

That’s how you end up where you are now. Face down, ass up, pillow tucked under your tummy, and Suguru doing his best to be quiet as he pounds into you in case any little ears are up against the door. You’re biting down on your chew necklace because it’ll be a cold day in hell before you willingly bite down on cloth for an extended amount of time. You don’t know how Satoru does it, but he doesn’t know how you can handle rolling around in wet sheets. If he forgives you now, he’ll be pissed again when he hears you dropped your towel and jumped Suguru’s bones.

The second trimester saw you getting hit by the horny truck. It hasn’t even been that long since he got his cock inside you, but you’re a fucking livewire these days. You exist on a low burn and you’re always on a hair trigger. Your nipples are off limits because the first trimester tenderness still has a chokehold on you, so he’s keeping his hands busy by spreading your cheeks and watching the slide of his cock in and out of you.

Suguru, who can get a little mean in bed, thumbs at your asshole, and that sends you over the edge. You catch yourself before you give the game away to the damn kids, throwing your head forward to bury your face and your moans in the mattress. Your entire body trembles and Suguru’s hips slow to a crawl, letting you come down without sensitivity, groaning quietly as your pussy tries to milk him for all he’s worth.

He hunches over, back bowed over yours, leaning until his breath is hot on the shell of your ear. “This is how you spoil me,” he husks as he reaches down between your legs. You hiss when his fingers quickly glide over your clit. “You and this perfect little pussy.” You roll your face against the sheets, moaning because if he doesn’t shut the fuck up, you might come again. “I can’t believe you thought that I wouldn’t want this.”

Panting, you turn your head to the side and spit out the gem-shaped silicone in your mouth. “Sorry for thinking that pregnancy doesn’t look good on me.”

“You should be sorry. It looks beautiful on you.” Your hand flies back, digging fingers into his ass, trying to keep him inside you when he slides out. You whine at the loss. “Impatient,” he chides. “On your back. Let me see that gorgeous body.” Heat crawls up the back of your neck, the tips of your ears.

“Stop it. You know I’m bad with sarcasm,” you grumble. You do as he says, though, and roll over. The pillow, previously under your stomach, is now in the small of your back and you sigh in relief. Your back has been aching something fierce lately. “Ugh, Suguru!” You cover your face with your hands because he’s staring at you. Gaze sweeping over your body, fingers following along with his eyes. “Stop looking! Leave that for Satoru.”

“It’s not sarcasm. Pregnancy looks so good on you.” You squeak when he grabs your hips, roughly hauling you down to settle the backs of your thighs over his. You’re not looking, but he slaps his cock against your pussy, making you squirm. You do dig a heel against his ass, trying to hurry him up. “It may have been an accident, but knowing that Satoru came inside you…” He slides back inside your pussy. “Knowing that it stuck…” His hands cup the sides of your bump. “You have no idea how jealous of him I’ve been.”

Your hands fall away from your face. “Okay.” Shyly, you reach down and lace your fingers through his. “Next time, I’ll let you accidentally knock me up.”

“It’s not an accident if it’s planned.”

The two of you snort and grin and you just start giggling. “You’re such an asshole.” You throw your arms over your eyes. You think you might cry. You’re a whirlwind of emotions—horniness and happiness with a shit-ton of longing. “Can you just let me say I wanna have your baby?”

I love you.

Would Satoru be mad if you said it now?

“A married woman saying things like that?” Finally, Suguru starts moving. It helps distract you from the words stuck in your teeth. “How lewd.”

“Pregnant Married Woman Begs for New Daddy—how’s that for a JAV title?” Suguru can’t hide the hitch in his breath, the way his fingers dig harder into your skin, how his thrusts pick up speed. You lift your arm up, peering at him, grinning in sadistic delight when you see how red his cheeks are. “Do you wanna be our daddy, Suguru?”

Suguru can talk all that sexy shit but can’t take it? Because he reaches down to start rubbing slow circles around your clit, knowing that letting your orgasm build slowly makes your brain leak out through your ears. Sure enough, the heat starts in your toes, and pleasure rushes through your veins.

“You first,” you breathe out as you clutch at his wrist. “Want that come inside me when I go off.”

“Whatever you want, darling.”

You’re not sure how long you doze after you and Suguru were done. He’d wiped you down because you hate your skin to be sticky, same as Satoru. Which, speaking of, he’s in bed with you when you wake up—propped back against the headboard, shirtless, and on the 3DS. You shuffle closer, putting your head in his lap, and listen to the familiar sounds of Ocarina of Time 3D.

“I can’t wait until the new Animal Crossing in November,” Satoru gripes.

“Just play Pokémon. Did you know that there’s this challenge that’s spreading around on the internet? It’s called Nuzlocke and it’s supposed to be super hard. It’s up your alley.” His thumbs briefly pause. You know the challenge entices him. “You’re not betraying Digimon by playing Pokémon, I promise.”

“Yeah, whatever.” He snaps the 3DS shut, not even bothering to save his progress.

You lean forward to kiss his tummy, right over the scar that runs from his neck down along the upper half of his body. The day that he got this scar…it was and still is such a stark reminder that, no matter what, all sorcerers share the same fate. Just because Aka Manto didn’t notice you doesn’t mean another spirit won’t. “I’m sorry, Satoru,” you apologize quietly. “I really did fuck up with this. It’s so easy for me to forget that these aren’t pets or even comparable with wild animals.”

“I get it, I guess. Well, not really. It’s like me cutting myself off from sweets and I don’t think I can do that. So, I don’t get what it feels like when you can’t be around your thing. Ugh. Why did we ever get in a relationship? Talking about feelings sucks.”

You giggle. “You’re doing well.”

“You’re not being sarcastic, are you? Because I’m kinda freaking out. I’ve got four months to get my shit together.” He digs the heels of his palms against his eyes, groaning with frustration. “Yeah, sure, I can handle teenagers or those kids out there.” He means the twins and Fushiguro siblings. “They’re not babies, though. What the fuck do I do with a baby? And, let’s be honest, those kids are all pretty fucked up already, but the thought that I can fuck a kid up?”

You raise up on an elbow, watching him. “Satoru…”

“Oh, Christ. I’m having an existential crisis, Sketch. I’m a walking cliché right now. What if I become my old man? Are you gonna end up resenting me, too? Holy fuck, what if we turn into my parents? I have a horrible personality. I’m so selfish and conceited. I’m going to hurt this kid. I—”

Oh, okay. Has Satoru ever had a panic attack? Because you think he might be having one. “Satoru,” you call out as you press your hand against his chest. Under the skin, his heart is beating like crazy. “Hey, Satoru, I need you to look at me.” He does as you ask, sparkling blue eyes a little crazed with his dread. “Why isn’t Infinity on?”

“Huh?” He blinks out of the haze and looks down at where you’re touching him. “What? Why the fuck would Infinity be on right now? You’re touching me.”

“Right, but you’re scared right now. Infinity is your defense mechanism. Sometimes, you don’t even realize it’s flaring up when you get overstimulated. It usually blocks everything out.”

He squints at you before he repeats, “You’re touching me.”

“If you were selfish, your body wouldn’t care that it’s me, right? You’re not even thinking about it consciously. Keeping me safe, even from yourself, is instinct.”

“You might be reaching…”

“You could’ve let the Zen’in clan take Megumi,” you point out. “You took in the children of the only man that’s ever gotten close to killing you.” You lift up from the mattress completely, yanking the sheets up and over your bare shoulders. “You actively participate in the system you hate because you want to rework it from the inside-out, top-down. You want to protect kids, so why wouldn’t that extend to your own?”

“Fine, I won’t actively hurt the kid and I’ll make sure they don’t get physically hurt. That doesn’t mean—”

The pieces start to add up. Suguru isn’t the only one that’s been spiraling. “Were you doing retail therapy? Is that what all the bags are for? Don’t answer. I already know.” No wonder he’s been so snippy lately. “We got shoved into this. I’m doing okay right now, but I’ve lost my shit sometimes when you’re not around. I’m scared shitless that I’ll end up exactly like my parents, too. But…if I keep thinking about it then I will end up like them. I’ll get so lost in my head that I ignore this baby.”

“You’ve lost your shit and didn’t tell me?”

“That’s what you’re focused on?” You shake your head, chuckling in disbelief. “Yes, I did. Because I’m pretty sure that having a mental breakdown is a rite of passage for soon-to-be parents.” Lacing your fingers through his, you give a reassuring squeeze. “I know how terrifying this is. This might not help calm you down because you’re a little bit of a control freak, but you need to get it in your head now that we’re never gonna have all the answers and we’re gonna fuck up. All we can do is apologize and try to do better.”

Satoru’s cheeks puff out and his bottom lip juts out. “I hate unknowns.”

“Like I said—control freak.”

“Shut up.” He tugs at your hand. “Hey, come here. Sit in my lap.”

“Yes, yes.”

Satoru holds out his other hand, letting you use them as support while you climb up to straddle his waist. He tilts his head forward, shoving his face right between your breasts, and sighs happily like the little pervert he is. You only encourage the behavior with your quiet giggling.

“Sorry for being a bitch earlier,” comes a muffled apology.

“You weren’t being a bitch. Dare I say…you were actually mature about it.” He digs his fingers into your ticklish side, making you squawk. “I’m being serious! You knew you didn’t have a level head and couldn’t handle it sensitively, so you went to get help.”

“Ha!” He leans away from your chest. “You’re definitely overthinking my actions. It boiled down to me not wanting to deal with you anymore.” Yeah, right. What a fucking liar. “And what good did it do me to get that asshole? He leaves me to babysit his kids while he fucks my pregnant wife.”

“Joke is on you because you’re into sloppy seconds.”

“Heh! Fuck yeah, I am.” He sighs sadly. “I wanna fuck you so bad right now. I wish I had the mental energy to get it up.”

“We’ll cuddle tonight and have really gross, lovey-dovey morning sex. Sound good?”

Satoru bats those big, stupidly blue eyes at you. This drama queen somehow has tears in them and his bottom lip wobbles as he asks, “Can I suck on your nipples? I promise I’ll be gentle.”

“We’ll see.” You run your fingers through his hair. “You did really good today. If they’re too sore, I’ll make you chocolate chip waffles, okay?”

“Best wife ever.”

***

In the morning, you spoil Satoru.

You’re in his lap, on his dick, and his mouth never leaves your tits.

It hurt when he first put his mouth on them, you’ll admit, but it’s not enough pain to overload your brain. It’s that addicting pain, like how good it feels to stretch out a sore muscle. If it was a bad day, you wouldn’t want to deal with the confliction. That’s how you know today will be a good one.

And why wouldn’t it be a good day?

It’s a full house. All your favorite people are here. Suguru is curled up in the guest bed, Nanako and Tsumiki on either side of him while Mimiko is sprawled out and drooling on his chest. Megumi is out on the couch. You only hope that you can convince them all to stay longer. It’s the weekend, so no school. You’re not above bribery.

You and Satoru slowly rock. His huge hands are on your ass, guiding your movements, doing more work than you are at lifting yourself up and down on his cock. The grip he’s got on your ass gets rougher as he gets closer to coming, so it spreads your cheeks apart. Gentle as it is, sweat still lines your skin and his, so he has to sometimes readjust his grip. That’s all to say that his fingers are getting close to your asshole. Just the memory has you quickening the pace.

“Want him here so bad,” you whine.

Satoru knows immediately who you mean. Talking about Suguru in bed isn’t new for you and Satoru. “Fuck, I know. He blew my back out yesterday. Hey, wanna hear a story?” He reaches down, thumbing at your clit. “Didn’t really jerk off until I got in high school. First fantasy? Fucking your sweet little pussy while he’s plowing my ass.” You bury your face in the crook of his neck, biting down to muffle your moan. “Yeah? You want that? One day, baby. Not now because no way I can be gentle when that’s going down.”

You pant against his neck. “We have to tell him.”

“We will,” Satoru swears. Your orgasm hits you like a freight train, and he swears. “Fuck, fuck, fuck! Yeah, we’re gonna fucking tell him. We’re putting a ring on that bastard’s finger.” You nod along deliriously, chanting your agreement. “We’ll romance the fuck out of him. I swear that this kid is gonna have three parents—aw, fuck, ‘m coming!”

Satoru licks his come out of you before it has the chance to drip down your thighs. After he’s done, he flops behind you, and winds his spindly limbs with yours. You didn’t even realize how early it is until Satoru’s phone flashes in the pre-dawn light and flaunts the time. There’s a little time before you two have to roll out of bed. Chocolate chip waffles with strawberries and whipped cream actually sound really good right now. You’ll make Satoru help so that the food will be done when everyone wakes up.

“Were you serious about it?” You hum in question. Satoru goes on to elaborate. “Were you coming or were you agreeing with me about telling him before the baby is born?”

“Both,” you answer bluntly. He snorts in amusement. “I’ve been thinking about how we can confess.”

“No way! Me, too!”

“I don’t even want to imagine what your idea is.”

“Rude,” he bites your shoulder in rebuke. “We can take him on a date night. Serenade him with some fine dining. Finish the night in a nice hotel—”

“I will never do fine dining ever again, Gojo Satoru.” Just the memory of the plates rotating in and out of the table with so many varying, awful textures…you gag. Your teeth start to hurt. “I don’t know how you’ve put up with that for your entire life.”

Satoru laughs. “They bribed me with desserts to put up with it.”

What a stark reminder that you and Satoru are two sides of the same coin. Whether it’s your parents telling you to starve for the night if you refused to eat something because you hated the texture or his parents bribing him to force himself to grin and bear it, it’s all the same. Even after you were diagnosed, your parents still forced you to eat whatever they made because they refused to make two dinners. You had to learn to not let the discomfort and disgust show because they’d make the same thing again, over and over until you liked it.

Filled with a sudden and fierce protectiveness, you roll over and face Satoru head on. He raises a brow at your sudden change of mood. “Infinity doesn’t recognize me as a threat,” you remind him. “So, I want you to know that I could rip your balls off, no problem. If our baby doesn’t like a food or the way something feels, no one is going to force them to put up with it. End of story.”

Satoru blinks, processing your threat. Then, slowly, he looks down between your bodies. “Oh.” His cheeks are flushed when he raises his head back up. “I’m hard.”

Somehow, you’ve been banished to the couch while Suguru and Satoru take charge of breakfast.

“Mister and Mister Control Freak,” you mutter under your breath as you shuffle out of the kitchen.

The couch is big enough that you don’t even touch Megumi when you sit down on the other side. You silently play a game on your own 3DS, trying not to wake him prematurely, but he starts to stir not soon after the smell of waffles fills the air. You reason that the girls won’t be far behind.

It’s cute, watching Megumi slowly lift up, spiky hair even wilder, blinking blearily. He harrumphs, so put upon by the waking world. You expect him to crawl off the couch and rummage around in his overnight bag to find a book to read, but he doesn’t do that. Instead, he scoots closer to you, almost touching you. His eyes droop and he starts slumping in your direction. Just before he presses against your side, he remembers himself.

Voice rough with sleep, he asks, “Can I?” It makes you gooey on the inside. Makes you want to give him shit, too. Because he can pretend to be the cool and stoic type all he wants, but he’s stupidly protective of his sister and he does sweet things like never forgetting to ask for permission to touch you.

“Yes,” you answer warmly. “Thank you for asking.”

Megumi grunts, slumps against you, puts his head on your shoulder, and yanks his blanket up over himself. You bump your cheek against his head affectionately. It’s not long of watching you game before he’s dozed off again.

Not long after, the girls emerge from the guest bedroom all at once.

Three sets of feet go running. You’re certain they’ll be lured to the kitchen by the aroma of breakfast, but they bypass it entirely, and sprint to where you are on the couch. Megumi is startled awake, and you cringe at the sound of three high-pitched voices calling out your name.

Your relationship with touch is…complicated. You’re starved for it, but you only want it from people you know. Even with them, you have to prepare for it. You try to reason with your brain that the girls are excited. They haven’t seen you in a little while. As most little girls are, they’re ecstatic about your pregnancy because they dream of when they can have that, too. But they dogpile you, crowding close, reaching their hands out to touch your baby bump. Nanako, in her excitement, even slips her hands under your shirt. Panic shoots through you and you jerk as if you’ve been electrocuted.

“Girls,” Suguru’s voice rises above the rest. You don’t look over your shoulder, but his disappointment is palpable. “What have we said about touching people?”

Suguru has only spoken with Nanako and Mimiko, but even Tsumiki knows the answer. In unison, they mutter, “Ask.” The sigh of relief you give when they back away makes you feel awful. “We’re sorry.”

“Dumbasses,” Megumi hisses at them all.

“Yo! Who taught you that word?” Satoru shouts from the kitchen. “Bad word!”

“You,” Megumi answers bluntly.

“Breakfast is ready,” Suguru announces.

Guilt and anxiety twist up your insides. For all your talk of not making your child do something, you worry about not being able to give them the things they’ll need. Babies don’t care about overstimulation. They’ll cry. When they’re older, they’ll crave this same kind of touch, and how horrible a mother would you be to deny them that? Parenting has no breaks. A child’s needs come before your own. Do you think you’ll be allowed to have days where you don’t talk? What if you’re in public with them and you have a breakdown?

“Squid.” Suguru is crouched down in front of you. “I see you spiraling.” He holds out a hand. “Come eat.”

“Not hungry,” you whisper. The anxiety has muted your hunger. “I want to go back to bed.”

“If Satoru dragged me out of my spiral, I have to do the same.” You scowl at him. How is that even fair? You weren’t the one to pull him out of his hole. “I’m being very nice right now. I won’t make you talk about it. I just need you to try and get a little something down. If it’s too loud in the kitchen, I’ll bring it out here.”

Right. Okay. You’ve dealt with being pushed to power through the overload for your entire life. If you want to be a good mother, then you’ll keep doing that. That’s what being a parent is, right? Sacrifice. If you can force yourself to do something so that your child never goes without, you’ll do that. It’s better to practice now.

With a shaky sigh, you take Suguru’s hand, and let him help you up to your feet.

***

Sunday night comes too soon.

When it’s only you and Satoru left in the penthouse, you start to scheme.

Try to, anyway.

The two of you are on the couch, hunched over Satoru’s laptop. You’re both hopeless when it comes to romance, so you think that the internet might be helpful. The two of you titter and fuss and argue over control of the laptop after the first search of ‘how to confess’ only brings up articles for high schoolers.

“Wait!” Satoru is dead serious when he declares, “We need to buy a house.”

Your eye twitches. “Satoru,” you start slowly as you pinch the bridge of your nose. “He hasn’t even said yes. We don’t know that he even will. Can we take this one step at a time, please?”

“Eh? We should start the process, though. We only have four months left and it feels like we have so much to do. On top of my assignments, my mother is on my ass about Inu no Hi. Oh, we’ve got the babymoon to schedule. And we have to go to parenting classes because it’s not like either of us are asking our parents for tips.” He brightens. “Oh! What about that? We’ll have him house hunt with us, and we’ll pop the question when we make our choice.”

If you think too hard about the list he rattled off, you will meltdown. Like you told him, one step at a time. Just ignore all the rest. “Pop the question? This isn’t marriage. We can’t be overbearing. He’s like me. He’ll hate grand gestures and a house is…big.”

“Why are you struggling so much with this? You were his best friend first. Hasn’t he dated before? What’d they do when they were trying to pick him up?”

“School in the sticks was awful for us. Everyone knew everyone. We were the weird kids who saw things that weren’t there and that stuck with us for the rest of our lives, even when we learned to hide it. So, yeah, he was hot by middle school, but no one was interested in the local freaks.”

Satoru flops back with a loud groan. “Could you guys have been any more pathetic?”

“Your sympathy astounds me, Satoru, truly,” you say dryly.

“I wish I’d had met you guys sooner,” he confesses after a moment of silence. “I was such a problem child, always throwing tantrums, so I think my parents would’ve thrown money at yours to let you guys live with me at the Gojo estate. I’d probably have a less shitty personality if I was around people who understood me.”

“That’s debatable.” He digs his toes into your ticklish side, and you swat his feet away with a squeal. “I think the worst parts of your personality come from the fact that you were super spoiled and raised to think you’re a god. I also think the good outweighs the bad, so don’t get self-conscious.”

“Me? Self-conscious? I don’t know the meaning of that, dear.” Satoru shifts his position and puts his head in your lap. It’s his favorite place, you swear. He’s on his back. As he’s looking you in the eye, he reaches up to touch your face. “Ever since I was a kid, I never thought that I could connect to someone the way I’ve done with you.”

Heat rushes to your cheeks. You do have to look away from the eye contact this time. “You liked Suguru way before you liked me, y’know.”

“No. It was definitely you first,” Satoru corrects. “Shoko clocked me crushing on you even before I realized it. You should’ve seen how protective Suguru was of you.” He gives an airy laugh. “That’s why I’m not worried about him saying no, Sketch. It’s you. How can someone not be head over heels for you?”

You burst out into tears.

Satoru rolls with it because you’re a ball of nervous, hormonal energy these days. If you cried easy before, it’s insane how fast it can happen now. “I love you!” You definitely shouted that. You’re also definitely sobbing loudly. It’s okay because it’s with him, in private. Then, you think about how he wouldn’t care if you were in public because Satoru is the same.

Is this what true love is supposed to be like?

Because Satoru has admitted that you’ve taught him so much about his true self, but he’s taught you to accept yourself. Satoru is so sure of himself, both cocky and authentic. He knows that he doesn’t understand things like social cues, and he could give a shit less when he misses them. He’s loud and brash, especially when he’s excited. He’s blunt and a lot of people don’t like that, but a lot do. Ijichi has admitted that it saved his life when Satoru told him to quit being a sorcerer. Students have thanked Satoru for the honesty because it pushed them harder, and they survived because of it.

“I love you!”

Satoru keeps laughing but lifts up to a sitting position. “Alright, alright. I got it.” He slips an arm around your shoulders, reeling you in close against his chest. Before you smush your face against his shirt, he kisses your forehead. “I love you, too.”