#I can apologize like jake blues all the live-long day but nothing will change and nothing will be learned from the experience :]

[chiropteracupola]

...what if I put him in the videogame.

[trekscribbles]

Triple Threat: A Stone Triplets Fic (Chapter 2)

Fandoms: Leverage/Leverage Redemption, Librarians, and Almost Paradise

Cross-Posted: Ao3 and FF

Summary: Eliot and Jake are both in the Philippines for separate jobs that turn out to be related. Kai takes the existence of Alex's brothers as a personal attack on her mental health. Ernesto happily goes along for the ride.

Read Chapter 1 here.

Chapter 2: Double Trouble

The last time Eliot saw Alex was when they were 16 years old. Alex had been living with Uncle Danny for 6 years at that point, so the brothers didn't have much of a relationship even then, and the reunion had been awkward and tense. Jake was the one who tried to keep them together, who talked their father into hosting Christmas that year. He was the one who'd called Alex and begged him to come home for a week. Just a week.

They'd lasted three days.

At the time Eliot had blamed Alex—immature, bull-headed Alex, whose verbal and then physical fights with their father had led to his living with Uncle Danny in the first place. If he could have just learned to keep his mouth shut, most of the fights wouldn't have happened. Eliot and Jake had learned that lesson—why couldn't Alex? He always had to have the last word, no matter what the cost.

That last visit was what finally convinced Eliot to leave home. He thought about college, but eventually decided to enlist as soon as he turned 18 (without telling their father). Jake was supposed to go with him, but he'd wanted to see Alex one more time before they left. When months went by and Alex didn't come back, Eliot left both his brothers behind.

Age had given Eliot perspective, but by the time he was ready to apologize, Jake wouldn't take his calls. Alex had already joined the DEA, and a series of undercover assignments for both of them made it impossible for Eliot to reach out. And then he got involved with Moreau, and getting in touch was no longer an option. It would have put them in too much danger, and that was one thing Eliot would never do. But after a while, even that became an excuse. After he escaped Moreau, after Nate created a team and a family for him, he let the silence continue. He'd made that choice on his own.

And now apparently Alex was in the Philippines. Permanently, according to the detective who introduced herself as Kai Mendoza. That was all she would tell him (through gritted teeth, as though Eliot had committed some unforgivable sin by asking). "We have to take care of this mess," she'd grumbled. "Then we'll take you to see Alex."

She hadn't asked if Eliot wanted to see Alex, and part of him was glad for that. If he'd been given the option, he wasn't sure he'd have said yes. It would have been easy to say that he was too busy, that he couldn't stay, that it was better for them not to meet. But now that the offer was there, Eliot couldn't turn it down. One way or another, he was going to see his brother today.

Kai and her partner Ernesto drove him and the two men they'd arrested to the police station, where Eliot was firmly told to stay in the car. Kai paused after giving the order as if waiting for him to argue, even after he nodded and promised to stay put. Apparently Alex hadn't changed much since they were kids.

While the others were inside, Eliot took a few minutes to call Hardison and update him on the job. It was just the two of them on this one, with Hardison pulling the strings from somewhere in Vietnam while Eliot worked on the ground in Cebu.

Hardison picked up on the first ring. "All done? I booked you a flight back to New Orleans on—"

"I ran into a little snag," Eliot interrupted.

"What kind of snag?"

Eliot explained most of his encounter with Kai and Ernesto, but he couldn't bring himself to include the fact that he'd been mistaken for one of his long-lost triplet brothers. Hardison knew he had siblings, but Eliot hadn't ever gone into details about them. He wasn't sure what he'd say now, and he knew Hardison would have questions. Best to leave it be. He'd give Hardison a more in-depth explanation later.

"So now what?" Hardison asked.

"Now we wait and see if they can salvage the sting. If they arrest Flores, our work is done."

"And if they don't?"

"I'll let you know."

There was a pause, as if Hardison was trying to decide whether or not to voice his next thought. "Is there something else?"

Eliot sighed. He tried not to lie to Hardison or Parker, but he didn't want to have this conversation now. "Not about the job," he answered. "I'll explain later."

To his credit, Hardison didn't argue, even though he had to be burning with curiosity. "Okay. Call back when you have more to share."

"Yeah."

It was another twenty minutes before Kai and Ernesto emerged from the police station, both wearing grim expressions. They were talking as they approached the car, and Eliot caught the tail end of their conversation through the open windows.

"I didn't want to bring him in on this," Kai was saying.

Ernesto shrugged. "We don't really have a choice anymore."

"Things get messy when his family is involved. It'll only complicate things."

Interesting. Which of his relatives had already come to the island? Evidently Eliot's family had a knack for disrupting the locals.

"Ocampo's orders," Ernesto said. He opened the passenger door and slid into the car, turning to look over his shoulder at Eliot. "We'll take you to see Alex, but you're going to have to come back to the station and explain what you were doing with Flores."

Eliot crossed his arms. "Figured you'd want to know that first."

"We do," Kai said, with a frown at her partner. "You owe the delay to Alex. He's helped us out in the past, and Ernesto thinks we should tell him you're here before he finds out from someone else."

"The surprise could kill him," Ernesto said mildly.

"You just want to see his face when we show up with his doppelganger."

"Don't you?" Ernesto asked. Kai huffed and dropped into the driver's seat.

They lapsed into silence during the drive, which Eliot appreciated. His stomach had begun an uneasy churn, though he told himself it was just because of the heat. There was nothing to be nervous about. Sure Eliot hadn't reached out, but neither had Alex. Neither had Jake, for that matter. Eliot had gone home once, just after he got out of the service, and found Jake had taken over the oil company. Their neighbors said that Jake was turning things around, digging out of debt and even managing a profit, and Eliot accepted the blessing and drove out of town without stopping by the house. It was enough that Jake was happy. He didn't need Eliot coming back and ruining things for him.

Kai pulled into the parking lot of another hotel, dodging groups of brightly dressed tourists as she went. "He owns the gift shop here at the resort," Ernesto explained, flashing a friendly smile over his shoulder. Kai didn't look at him as she got out of the car, but Eliot was happy to keep his silence. He trailed behind her as she led the way through the resort, winding around pools and umbrella-covered tables, slowing every few moments so Ernesto could greet someone. Apparently the friendliness wasn't an act—or else it was a very good one. But something about the man felt genuine, as if he couldn't be bothered to put up a front.

Kai, on the other hand... she was harder to read. Especially now that she wasn't giving Eliot anything to work with except the occasional glare.

Before long the bustle of the resort faded as concrete transitioned to sand beneath their feet. A small building rose ahead of them, still against the backdrop of gentle waves and lazy clouds. A soft breeze ruffled Eliot's hair, filling his lungs with salt and sunshine. He wanted to stop, to look out at the water and breathe in the sea spray and the silence, but the others kept walking.

No wonder Alex had picked this spot. If retirement was in Eliot's future, he could see himself in a place like this.

Ernesto reached the door, and Eliot took one last windswept breath to brace himself.

"You look nervous," Kai murmured.

No he didn't. He knew he didn't, because the only emotions he gave away were the ones he wanted people to see. And he was most definitely not nervous. But her eyes lingered on his, and something softened in her expression.

"Don't worry," she said, giving him a small, hesitant smile. "It'll be fine."

"Alex," Ernesto called, and Eliot's stomach gave another roll. This was a mistake. He shouldn't have come. He tried to back away, but Kai put her hand on his arm and cut off his retreat, guiding him inside.

The gift shop was empty besides one man restocking a rack of post cards. He stood with his back to them, but it was impossible to mistake him for anyone else. He had the same build as Eliot, the same brown hair he'd have to fight to keep straight in this humidity, the same scarred hands from years of work and fighting.

"Hey!" Alex said without turning around. "Check it out, I got new cards."

Ernesto started across the room, gesturing for Eliot to follow. "How come you didn't tell us you had a twin?"

Alex looked at him. "A twin? I don't have a tw—"

His eyes fell on Eliot, and his words died. Eliot could feel Kai watching them, waiting for a reaction, but he couldn't think of anything to say. Hey, how've you been the last 30 years? Oh, me? Well, first I was an international assassin, and now I work with a group of thieves who steal from the rich and give to the poor. I still punch people for a living though. How about you?

Something started beeping. Eliot started—no, not started, just looked around for the source—but Alex slapped his hand to his wrist and the sound stopped.

"Everything okay?" Ernesto asked. Alex made a noncommittal sound, glancing at him before returning his attention to Eliot. His eyes seemed bluer than Eliot remembered. It was probably just the lighting, but since it was the only thought that didn't spiral out of control, it was the one Eliot clung to. Blue eyes like their mother's, like the pond water in the back yard. Blue eyes that had been red with anger and hurt the last time he'd seen them.

"Which one are you?" Alex asked.

Behind him, Kai made a choking sound. Ernesto shushed her.

"But—" she sputtered. "Are there more of them?"

Eliot refocused on his brother. "You don't recognize me?"

"You both look the same," Alex deadpanned.

"Well, we're in the Philippines and I'm speaking English."

For a long moment Alex simply stared at him as if trying to read the details of their separation in his face. Then he reached out, and Eliot braced himself for the punch. He wouldn't fight back—not at first, not unless things got out of hand. He could take a hit or two, let Alex burn off some of his anger, and then try talking. They weren't 16 anymore. They could handle this like adults.

But Alex didn't hit him. His arms flashed out past Eliot's head, wrapping around his shoulders, pulling him tight. "Eliot," he murmured, crushing him in a hug that drove the breath from Eliot's lungs. He didn't care. He grabbed two fistfuls of Alex's shirt and squeezed, pressing everything he couldn't voice into the embrace.

"It's good to see you," Alex said at last, gruffly. He pulled away without taking his hands from Eliot's shoulders. "What are you doing here?"

"Uh... work."

Alex frowned at the hesitation. "What kind of work?"

Eliot sent a look over his shoulder, where Kai and Ernesto still waited. They clearly had some kind of relationship with Alex, but how far did that extend? Likely not far enough to keep from arresting Eliot for the half-dozen laws he'd broken to secure his meeting with Flores. "I'll tell you later."

"Now's as good a time as any," Kai said. "You can tell us now or at the station, whichever you prefer."

"We can give them a little longer," Ernesto argued.

"Flores is still out there. The longer we wait, the more time he has to act."

"Who's Flores?" Alex asked. He let his hands slide from Eliot's shoulders, a frown settling over his face.

Kai gave him a pointed look. "I'll tell you later."

"I think you should tell me now."

"I don't care what—"

Ernesto held his hands up, putting himself between the two of them. "Kai, we can give them a few more minutes to catch up. We'll be outside, Alex. Ten minutes." He looked at Eliot. "Then you come to the station with us. Understand?"

"Fine," Alex said. "Ten minutes. I got it."

Though Kai looked like she wanted to argue, she allowed Ernesto to guide her toward the door. "Nice friends you've got," Eliot muttered.

He'd meant it as a joke, but Alex gave a serious nod. "Yeah. They are. They're closer than some of my family."

Apparently they were going to fight after all. "I didn't know how to contact you," Eliot said.

"You're smart. You couldn't figure something out?"

"Couldn't you?" Eliot countered. "The last I heard you were undercover. Reaching out would have put you in danger."

"I'm retired now," Alex said.

"So I hear."

Alex crossed his arms over his chest. "I did try to find you. There was a rumor going around that you'd died."

"I didn't. Well, I did once, but it didn't stick."

"How long ago was that?"

"While you were still undercover."

Alex gave a frustrated growl. "Fine. We both could have done more, alright? Just... fill me in on the case."

The case was a safe topic, so Eliot embraced the change without complaint. He gave his brother the basics as he knew them: Robert Flores was looking to set up a base to smuggle drugs to the United States. Hardison had been tracking him throughout Asia, but when business kept him in Vietnam he'd contacted Eliot about finishing the job. "Should have been simple enough," Eliot said. "Set up a meeting, figure out his weakness, take him down."

"But you weren't the only one after him," Alex said. He heaved a sigh. "How mad was Kai when you showed up?"

An involuntary smile pulled at Eliot's lips. "She thought I was you. I think she wanted to kill me more than Flores's men did."

Alex chuckled, sobering a moment later. "So this is what you do? You go after international criminals?"

"More or less."

"With who? I mean—CIA? Interpol?"

"It's kind of a freelance operation."

Alex shook his head. "That doesn't make any sense."

"It's a lot to explain," Eliot said. "And I will, I promise. Soon as we have the time."

"Right." Alex gave him another long look, and a small grin appeared on his face. "It's good to see you, man. It's been too long."

Eliot didn't try to stop his answering grin. "You go by Walker now?"

"You'd already taken Mom's name. Didn't leave me with much of a choice."

"Yeah, but... Walker? As in Texas Ranger?"

Alex hissed and shot a look toward the door. "Don't say it out loud, man. I've got a reputation to keep up here."

Eliot laughed, but Ernesto chose that moment to knock and peek into the gift shop, effectively ending the conversation. "You two finished?" he called.

"For now," Alex answered. "Where's Kai?"

"She went to get some coffee. She'll be back any minute."

Alex nodded. "Good. I wanna be back before the afternoon rush."

"You're not coming," Ernesto said. "I don't think Kai can handle two of you."

Eliot folded his arms. "For the record, I'm not Alex's double. If anything he's my double. I'm older."

"By eight minutes," Alex snapped.

"That's older."

Alex huffed a wordless reply, and Eliot felt a glow of something familiar in his chest. This was an argument they'd had hundreds of times—Eliot, being the oldest, started it most often when they were kids. Jake had come next, and then Alex—Baby Alex, they called him, whenever he was being annoying. Eliot was pleased to find the joke still funny.

Even better, Alex seemed to still find it annoying. Eliot couldn't say why that felt so comforting. Maybe it was just that he was thankful to see a glimpse of the old Alex, the one he'd known before they let their father and their pride get in the way of their relationship. Maybe it was the fact that Alex was relaxed enough to have this conversation in front of Ernesto. Maybe Alex had found a team the way Eliot had.

Maybe it was a good thing he'd come here after all.

[typical-simplelove]

Vital Words (E. Pettersson)

Summary: Four times Elias failed to have the words to talk to you and One time he finally found the words to talk to you. 

Warnings: none that I can think of!

a/n: Thank you so much to @dripkingpetey for helping me with this! Without their help, this would not have been finished. So, thank you! 

Word Count: 4593

There were a few days in his life in which Elias could point to and say “that is when my life changed.” There are the obvious ones, when he got drafted, played his first NHL game, or scored his first goal. However, those days pale in comparison to the day that he met you. The day he met you, Elias knew that he was gone, even if he could barely talk to you. To put it simply, you changed Elias’s life. 

One

You were sitting on a bench in Stanley Park watching the ducks swim in the water. You weren’t doing anything and weren’t waiting for anyone. All you wanted to do was sit and stare. You weren’t expecting anything to happen all that interesting. You were just about to take out your phone and post a picture to your Instagram story when out of nowhere, a soccer ball hit you square in the head. For a moment, you forgot what was happening.

When you finally realized what happened and where you were, all you saw was a ton of very, very handsome men and even prettier women crowding around you profusely, apologizing. However, all this didn’t matter, all you could focus on was this one person. He had the most beautiful blonde hair and striking blue eyes. He didn’t say anything; however, he caught on to you staring. You could feel the heat and throbbing on your face -- you’ve been caught staring.

You knew that you somehow said, “I’m ok. It’s fine.”

“Can you tell me your name?” the friend of this mysterious blonde said.

“My name’s Yn.”

He nods and says, “Yn. My name’s Brock and my friend over here is incredibly sorry for hitting you in the head.” Brock gestures to the same blonde man whose face suddenly grew hot. 

“Oh, um, I’m fine. I grew up with my neighbors and family hitting me in the head with soccer balls all the time,” you replied, getting a laugh from the crowd around you. 

“If you’re all ok then, we’ll let you be. Unless, Elias, you have something to say?” Brock says with a smirk, knowing his friend was developing the start of a crush on you. This mysterious blonde’s name is Elias you thought to yourself. He’s really cute.

Elias said nothing. He was too in awe of how beautiful you were. 

“Okay then,” Brock says, looking puzzled at his friend. “I hope that we didn’t ruin your day, Yn.”

“You’re all good,” you replied as the crowd around you left. As everyone was walking away, you saw Brock shaking his head at Elias. I wonder what that was about you thought to yourself. 

“Dude,” Brock said once you were out of earshot. “What is wrong with you? You hit her with a ball and can’t even apologize? Come on, man.”

Elias said nothing, his face noticeably getting hotter.

“Oh no! Is Elias tongue tied over a pretty girl?” Jake chirped.

“I’m not!” Elias insists, finally speaking. “She’s just really beautiful.”

Brock and Jake snicker next to Elias. 

Today was the day that Elias met you, the day that his life changed. Even if he didn’t know it, he was subconsciously living his life to find his way back to you and make you proud. He only knew your name but he wanted every part of you - good and bad. He wanted everything with you, and yet he couldn’t think straight and say anything to you. Elias’s life was thrown a curve ball and everything was about to change. And this was the first of many frustrating encounters in which Elias cannot find the words to talk to you. 

Two

For weeks after Elias’s encounter with you, he could not keep you out of his thoughts. Your HC colored hair, the way your EC colored eyes twinkled in the sun, the way your forehead wrinkled together because of the glare of the sun. These thoughts sporadically came into Elias’s mind and he smiled like an idiot in response. 

The next time Elias saw you was at the next home game. You and your best friend had tickets to this game for a while now. You both grew up in Vancouver and were long time Canucks fans. You and your best friend received these gifts as a corporate gift at your guys’s job. The seats were amazing as you two were sitting behind the Canucks bench. You were wearing your Pettersson jersey and your best friend was wearing her Boeser jersey. Little did you know that the boy who has been plaguing your thoughts was Canucks number 40, the same boy who threw a soccer ball at your head. You didn’t go to the games to watch the players. You went to the games to watch the game. For this reason, you had yet to realize that Elias Pettersson was the same boy who has been stuck in your head. 

When the team came out onto the ice you noticed someone you recognized - Brock. You began looking at the other players and remembered them as they surrounded you making sure you were okay. With this, you realized that the group of people in which the soccer ball came from were the Vancouver Canucks!

“YFN, remember how I was telling you about how I was hit in the head?” you rushed out.

“By a very handsome man,” your friend teases, earning an eye roll from you. “Yes, I remember.”

“Guess who’s number 6? And number 40?”

Your friend, oblivious and confused to what you're implying, glances down at your guys’s jerseys. You just stare at her. It takes a few moments of you staring at her for her to realize what’s going on.

“Oh my goodness!!! Elias Pettersson hit you with a soccer ball!!!”

You just nod, not wanting to bring any attention to yourself.

“Well, now that you know who he is, maybe you should DM him and talk to him,” YFN starts.

You interrupt her, “No, no way. There is no way that he’d want to talk to me. And besides, what would I have to say to him?”

“Um, I don’t know. Something along the lines of, ‘hi, you hit me with a soccer ball, you’re gorgeous, and I can’t stop thinking about you and you owe me so maybe we can go out for drinks or dinner sometime?’”

“No, absolutely not. Isn’t that kind of creepy?”

“Not really, I mean --” YFN is interrupted when you hear your name being called from the ice. You look over and see Brock  calling out for you from the bench.

“Oh!” you begin, shocked directing yourself towards the ice. “Hi! It’s been a while. This is my best friend, YFN. YFN, Brock.”

Brock gives you and YFN a nod and then gives you a finger indicating for you to wait a moment. You nod in response and look at your friend. She just smiles at you with a Christmas morning grin on her face. You roll your eyes and shake your head before returning your gaze to the ice where Brock is. You see Brock trying to get Elias’s attention. You instantly begin to feel the heat rush to your face. You silently try to will it away knowing that Brock is going to bring Elias over. 

“Hey YN. You remember Elias, the one who hit you with a soccer ball.” Brock says.

You nod, “yeah, I mean, It doesn’t happen all that often anymore so it’s not that hard to remember who did it.”

You chance a glance at Elias and your face grows even hotter. He is so much more gorgeous in his hockey gear. You stare for a few seconds but it feels like hours. You imagine just running your hands through his hair and just getting to look into his eyes all the time. YFN clears her throat to try to get you back to reality. You see Brock whisper something to Elias. Elias turns to your but pales, if that's even possible. Your energy instantly deflates knowing he’s turning pale because of you.

“Anyways, we have to get back. It was good to see you, YN.” Brock says. 

“It was, yeah,” you reply. “Good luck tonight.”

Brock flashed you a smile before skating away. As he’s skating away, you watch him smack Elias’s head and then shake his head. As the duo join more of the team, you watched more of their teammates shake their head towards Elias. 

Elias wishes he could say something to you. He doesn’t know what it is about you but for some reason, your presence makes him tongue tied. He had the thoughts, this time, about what he wanted to say but couldn’t open his mouth to say it. He didn’t know what it was. He didn’t really know anything about you. He knows, though, that if he got to know you, it would be even harder to talk to you. 

“Dude, again, what was that?” Brock accuses Elias. “You can’t stop thinking about her and you can’t even say anything to her?”

“I don’t know what to do. Whenever I’m around her, I can’t get the right words out.”

Throughout the game, whenever possible, Elias constantly glanced at you. Every time he glanced at you, you were always looking right at him. When he catches your eye, he can’t help but smile at how flustered and red you became. He knew that for a fact that he was falling absolutely in love with you. 

Despite the win and Elias finding the back of the net that night, you and Elias both went home with a weird, empty feeling. Elias just hoped that the next time that he saw you he could get the words out.

Three

Despite the silent resolution to himself to get the words out to you when he saw you again, Elias couldn’t. It didn’t matter. You made his mind go blank and forget how to talk, both in English and Swedish. Ever since the home game you were at, you were the only thought in Elias’s head. He hoped to see you in the stands again. If Elias was making dinner, his first thought would be if you liked what he was making. If Elias was watching a movie, his first thought would be whether or not you liked said movie. Again, if Elias was playing video games, his first initial thought would be if whether or not you liked video games. 

It was worse when he actually left his apartment. If the team went out for a team brunch or night of drinks, Elias wanted you there. He wanted you to be there to experience everything with him. He always thought that maybe he would run into you. Elias wanted to know if you liked the same things as him. He wanted to know you. He just straight out wanted you. He wanted to wake up holding you and kiss you good morning. He wanted to cook you breakfast in the morning and show up at your door with your favorite coffee. Every single day, Elias hoped that today would be the day that you two would randomly meet each other again and he could redeem himself. He hoped that maybe you would slide into his DMs to talk to him. He just hoped that the universe would work in his favor once again and not laugh at him. 

So, when Elias saw you again, he blessed the universe. Despite the location of this chance meeting - a gas station. 

You were struggling to bring the gas pump to your car. You mistakenly drove into one of the stalls that ended up with the pump being on the opposite side of the gas gauge on your car. It was hard. You were already running late and desperately needed gas in your car to get to work. 

Much to your chagrin, a fancy looking sports car rolled up at the stall behind you. You sighed. You didn’t want anyone to see you struggle, especially someone who must be able to figure out a gas station properly.

As you continue to struggle, the person in the sports car notices you struggling. He decided to get out and help you. 

“Do you need help?” you hear someone ask. Your ears perk up knowing that you’ve been caught.

“Oh! Yes, please! I forgot that the gas gauge was on the other side of my car and now I can’t seem to get the pump to come over. And, I am running extremely late.” you ramble, you cheeks beginning to flare. When you finally look up and notice this man, your cheeks flare even more and you stop breathing. You look him straight in his piercing blue eyes and he looks right back into your EC eyes he so desperately remembers. You stop breathing. Elias, you think. The boy that has been plaguing your thoughts constantly just has to be driving a fancy sports car and happens to see you again when you aren’t put together. 

“Hi,” you whisper and your face grows even more red. He just stares at you, finally blinking this time, and doesn’t say anything. Typical, you think. Elias doesn’t say anything, he just nods and reaches over to grab the gas pump from where you were struggling to bring it over the hood of your car. In doing so, his hand slightly brushes yours and both your faces grow a deep red. As Elias effortlessly pulls the gas pump over into the gas gauge, you can’t help but take notice of his very toned arms. You imagine what it would be like for him to hold you and take care of you. Your daydreaming inches your face to grow even more red. 

When your gas tank is full of its needed gas, Elias takes it out and puts it back on the stall. 

“Thank you,” you begin. “You have no idea how much of a life saver you are. Thank you so much, Elias.”

Again, he doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t have the words. All he can think about is wanting to kiss you. When he saw you struggling, all he wanted to do was make you feel better. He wanted to help you fill up your car with gas, give you a giant hug, and then buy your favorite hot beverage to help you. When you barely whispered a hi, Elias knew he was gone. How is it possible that one word made him so flustered? All it took was for you to say hi and he was gone. There was nothing he could do about it. He couldn’t tell if the universe was laughing at him or blessing him.

He nods in response to your words of thanks, that’s all that he can do. As you walk away, Elias tries but desperately but fails to call out a wait. He wants to exchange phone numbers so that you guys don’t just meet based on fate anymore. He wants to tell you that he can’t stop thinking about you. He has all these feelings and yet can’t say a single word to you. 

When you get in your car, you have the biggest smile on your face. You shake your head in a playful way to try to wipe it off. You can’t. As per usual, Elias can’t say a word to you. However, just seeing him for all five minutes will be enough to pump your feelings further and fuel your daydreams for the next few weeks until the possible fate encounter again. 

Elias watches you from where he was standing and watches you smile and shake your head in a playful manner. His smile widens even more. He takes this as a sign that maybe you are as infatuated with him as he is with you. When you drive away, Elias’s smile falters but only slightly. Just seeing you gives him a reason to smile. When he got to practice after your fated encounter at the gas station, Elias still had a bright smile on his face. He played very well and everyone took notice. After practice, Brock questioned Elias about his actions. Elias can’t do anything but proudly wear a giant smile on his face. This is enough for Brock to know exactly what is going on in Elias’s head. Elias saw you again. However, Elias’s lack of want to say what happened proves that Elias didn’t say anything to you, again. 

Brock just hopped that one day Elias would be able to tell you how he felt about you. 

Four

“She’s getting married!” Elias exclaims to Brock over the phone.

“What?” Brock questions, absolutely confused. 

“Yn, she’s getting married. If only I had the guts to say something to her maybe then she could be marrying me!”

“Whoa, slow down buddy. First, you met her only a month ago. If she were getting married now, then she’d have been engaged one month ago, too. Second, I don’t recall ever seeing a ring on her finger. Lastly, I need to know exactly what happened.”

“I went for a run and I was walking back when I bumped into her. She was walking out of one of those wedding boutiques carrying a bag in her hand. What am I going to do? I am so in love with her and I now find out she’s getting married?” Elias hastily rushes out in distress. 

“Did you say anything to her?”

Elias goes silent. No, he didn’t. He was walking and looking down at his phone when he bumped into you. You were about to scold him for looking at his phone, but when you noticed it was Elias, your face softened. You gently greeted him good morning. Once again, as per usual, Elias couldn’t say anything. He just gaped at you. He looked up at the building you were walking out of and the bag in your hand. Elias paled. You were carrying your wedding dress and he lost his chance with you. You gave him a confused look before connecting the dots. You rushed out a hurried I can explain. He didn’t listen. He shook his head and walked away.

“Why didn’t you let her explain?” Brock questions, flabbergasted. 

“What was I supposed to say?” Elias answers. “’Yes, please explain that you are getting married and break the heart of someone who is head over heels for you. Oh, and by the way, I can’t even say one word to her!”

“Maybe it’s not a wedding dress. She said she could explain. So, this means that it might not be a wedding dress.”

“Possibly,” Elias sighs. Their conversation is briefly interrupted when Elias hears a chime come from his phone. “Give me a minute. I got an Instagram notification.”

Elias takes his phone away from his ear and opens Instagram. He notices that it’s a DM notification, from yourusername. Elias stops breathing for a second. He’s taken out of his daze when he hears Brock’s questioning. 

“I have to call you back. She just DMed me.” Elias explains. Brock whistles in response think that Elias might finally be getting his chance with you. 

After hanging up the phone, Elias goes and looks at the notification. He has yet to read what it says. He takes a very deep breath before opening it. 

Yourusername: Can we talk? Maybe meet for coffee? Yourusername: Oh! It’s Yn. The girl who you keep on seeing but can’t seem to get the words to talk to her?

Elias laughs at your second text but goes pale immediately with your first request. You want to meet? What is he going to say to you? Elias decides that all that he can do is be honest with you; it’s what you deserve considering his actions.

_eliaspettersson: I would love to meet but I can’t promise I’ll be able to talk to you.

At least he was honest you thought. You wait a few moments before replying.

Yourusername: What if you try?

+ One

You were shaking. This was it. You were going to meet the man who you couldn’t stop thinking about. You were extremely nervous. You were waiting outside of the coffee shop you, Elias, and Brock were to meet at. Elias asked if Brock could tag along. He said that it meant that there was more of a chance he would be able to talk to you if Brock tagged along. You agreed. You would do anything to hear him talk. 

“Yn!” you hear someone call behind you. Your nervousness heightens but your smile grows. It fades a little bit when you realize it was Brock who called you, not Elias. 

“Hi, Brock,” you say to Brock. You look at Elias, “Hey.” He looks at you not saying anything. You sigh. You really hoped he would say something to you. Elias takes note of your sigh and takes a deep breath. Brock silently questions Elias’s actions. He looks like he is contemplating something. You are about to lead Brock and Elias into the coffee shop when, all of a sudden, Elias scoops you up into the best hug you have ever had. He holds your waist tightly but not too tightly. Tight enough to show that he is not leaving. He nuzzles his head into your neck and kisses it softly. You’re shocked at first but don’t hesitate to wrap your arms around him and hug him back with just as much compassion and love. You both hold the hug for just a few seconds then normal but if feels like eons. Brock clears his throat to signal that there were other things that needed to be discussed. When you and Elias separate, you both have a flushed look on your faces. You are about to lead Elias and Brock into the coffee shop when all of a sudden, Elias takes your hand. You jump slightly at the contact but don’t let go. 

When all three of you sit down and have your coffees, you decide to start explaining. You figure that Elias wasn’t going to say anything and it wasn’t Brock’s place to try to fix things. 

“So,” you begin. “I’m not getting married. My sister is getting married in a few months and she needed me to go pick up her dress. That was the only reason that I was walking out of the wedding boutique.”

You pause, waiting for a reaction. Elias smiles softly. Brock, however but no unexpected, is the first one to say something. 

“I told you, Petey.” Brock says. “I told you there was no way she was getting married.”

“Should I be offended that you don’t think I could be getting married?” you joke. Now it’s Brock’s turn not to be able to say anything. “I hope that this means that we can start over, Elias. Or at least have an actual conversation. You have been plaguing my thoughts for the past month and I have no idea what to do.”

Moments pass in awkward silence.

Finally, someone speaks quickly, “Can I take you out for a proper date and apology? A date because I am crazy about you and an apology for hitting you in the head with a soccer ball and not being able to say anything to you?”

You just smile. His voice is so much more beautiful than you thought. And, my goodness, that accent? You can’t help but fall more in love. You nod, words failing you this time around. 

“Finally!” Brock exclaims. “Now, I can leave so you two love birds can get to know each other.”

You and Elias both turn crimson red. You get kind of worried that Elias won’t be able to talk to you. 

However, your nerves are settled when he winks at you and says,“I think we will be just fine.”

+ Two, bonus

Four Years Later

“Remember, when you see her, you actually have to talk to her,” Brock jokes. Four years after that day in the coffee shop, you and Elias were getting married. For the first few months of the relationship, Elias constantly got tongue tied. However, as he got to know you more and fell more in love with you, he got less tongue tied. All this was thrown out the window whenever you got dressed up of any kind. Any time you got dressed up for a charity gala or for a night out with your friends, Elias instantly forgot to talk. Based on his track record, when he sees you, Elias might not be able to get the words out. He, and everyone else, knew that you were going to be dressed so beautifully for your wedding day. With your flowing white gown, lace veil, and perfectly styled hair, you were going to be so drop dead gorgeous that Elias will with no doubt have many, many hardships talking to you. You had to tell the guys that if they were going to place bets against him speaking, don’t tell Elias. 

“Very funny, Brock,” Elias tries to defend but his deep red blush peeking out shows that he is just as nervous about this. “I can actually talk to her now.”

Elias’s brother snickers behind him. “You barely said a word last night at the rehearsal and she was dressed pretty casually.”

Elias knows he has no defense. He knows he’s screwed. There is nothing he can possibly do to calm the nerves. You and Elias both opted to use the traditional wedding vows partially to try to garner a better chance of Elias being able to speak to you. Elias is just hoping that he can say “I do” without hesitation so that it doesn’t look like he doesn’t want to marry you. 

“What if I can’t speak to her?” Elias nervously asks. 

“Doesn’t she do something to bring you out of your head so that you can talk?” Brock asks. Elias doesn’t say anything but then remembers you do. Whenever you two are out with anyone and Elias fails to say any words, you would always softly stroke his bicep with your thumb to remind him where he is and that there are certain social norms that need to be met. Obviously, the action is more playful than accusatory. 

Elias nods in response. He is hoping that he can remember to talk. Gosh, he hopes that he doesn’t screw up. 

…  

When he saw you walk down the aisle, Elias knew he was screwed. The way that the light bounced off of your glowing smile and the white dress that compliments your body in the most perfect way set Elias over the edge. He wasn’t sure if he would be able to shake your father’s hand and promise him that Elias will take care of you for the rest of his and your life. 

When you reached Elias and flashed him your greatest, beautiful smile and whispered a soft hi similar to the one from the gas station all those years ago, Elias almost collapsed. Everything in the world disappeared; everything except for you. Elias just stared at you with the biggest smile on his face. He would have continued to smile at you if your father didn’t clear his throat signalling that Elias couldn’t just stare at you. This cough brought Elias out of his trance; he promised that he would love you, care for you, and provide for you forever as long as you shall live. You then gave your father a tearful hug and took Elias’s hand. When you were both situated standing in front of the officiant, you both turned to each other. Elias still had yet to say a word to you. This did not go unnoticed by you. You released your right hand from his grasp and reached over to his left bicep and stroked it softly.

With your soft action, Elias finally got the words out and said in a soft tone, 

“This is the start of our forever.” 

[gucciwins]

Into You

Breakup’s bring heartache but they also bring a new beginning.

Word Count: 8658

A/N: Angst, it was fun to write. Honestly, I really loved this ending. I struggle with endings but this felt like the perfect one. Relationships take work and no communication can ruin that. Remember to love and to trust. I love you 

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Julia: Dinner at 7 Cafe Habana

Julia: He won't be there

You sigh at the sight of the second message. It's pathetic that your friends have to let you know, but you don't want to run right into him. It is the last thing you need but the thing you want most. 

Pathetic. 

Y/N: I'll be there x 

You look at the text you sent and sign grateful for her reaching out. You haven't seen your friends in a few weeks, and it's been months since you've been to your favorite restaurant. Everyone knows how hard it's been since the breakup. They aren't choosing sides, but sharing a lot of the same friends is hard. You live in the city, and he's always on the road, it's only fair he gets to go out with them because you know you'll have other opportunities. 

You wore a comfortable sundress and black flats, not wanting to drive in heels. A gold bracelet on your wrist, fingers bear no rings like you usually did. A ring tan sitting on your right index finger makes your eyes foggy, but you shake the thought away and enjoy the ride down PCH window down the ocean breeze coursing through your hair. Joni Mitchell on blast to overpower your thoughts of memories connected to this exact drive you're making. 

Walking in, you take a deep breath and smile as soon as you open the door. The smile drops instantly when you see who's sitting two seats away from Julia right next to Jeff. Brown curls and a broad back. Tattoo's on display. You see her mouth an apology and lifts her phone. You walk out without a second thought, hoping they didn't see you. 

Your phone rings once you're back in your car. It's Julia, so you answer.

"Hey babe, I didn't know I swear. He walked in with Jeff talking about how he was here for the weekend then going back home to London." 

"It's fine, toots." You sigh. 

"Are you doing okay?" She asks voice a bit low.

You're trying to choke back your tears, but it's hard. It's hard because he's so close yet so far. He seems fine, perfect even, and here you are crying in your car like a loser. 

"It hurts, and it hurts to know he's fine. He's not hurting like I am. I miss-" You cut yourself off as you feel your tears falling down like a waterfall. "I want the pain to pass." 

"Sweetie, do you want me to meet you at your apartment?" 

"No, just let them know my sister called me and that it was a family emergency, but everything is fine. I'm going to head to her house for the weekend. Hug, my nephews. Stuff my face in cupcakes." 

"As long as you promise to bring me one." 

You laugh for the first time in what feels like forever. "That I can do." 

"Next Saturday, Alex's birthday. Say you'll show up for him." 

"I'm there. Got his gift all wrapped up." 

"You're not alone." She reminds you. "Despite all you think, you're still our friend." 

"Thank you. I love you, toots." 

You know breakups are never easy, but this one flipped your entire world upside down. You're not sure what's up or down, left or right. All you know is you gotta keep putting one foot in front of the other.

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The music is loud. It hurts your head, and you can't hear yourself think.

It's perfect. 

It's been so long since you allowed yourself to go out and drink. A party with friends is a guaranteed good time.

You decided to dress up. The way you dress is an excellent way to hide your emotions or so you've been told. A black dress, your favorite black dress. The little back dress that every woman is supposed to own. You paired it with red heels your sister gifted you two Christmas ago. Makeup was simple, but you did go with a bold red lip. It always made you feel more confident. 

You're three shots in when you hear a voice behind you. You ignore it at first but turn around when they say your name. 

"Jake?" 

"In the flesh." He jokes.

"Oh my gosh!" You bring him in a hug before pulling back to get a good look at him. "I didn't know you were in town. Do you know Alex?"

"No, his sister is my girlfriend." 

Your eyes widen. "No, we talk once a week, and you've never mentioned the girlfriend. Since when?" You punch his shoulder. 

"We've been together close to eight months now." A big grin on his face.

"My best friend is all grown up. Committed relationship, met the family, next is moving in or baby if you're following your dad's footsteps." You tease.

"No, baby, but we are moving in together. My lease in Seattle is up, and she has hers for another year."

"I'm happy for you." You place a hand on his forearm, letting it rest there. "She's amazing, and we get along so well. It's perfect." 

He nods, and you keep chatting as if no time has passed. It's comfortable with Jake, he's been your best friend since childhood, and although your sister thought you'd end up together, it just didn't work. You kissed once, and it was like kissing a wall. It's a sibling love, one that will never fade. 

He clears his throat, causing you to look at him. "I heard about," You cut him off before he can continue.

"Think everyone has, but I'm good. I won't lie and say I've been fine because I haven't been, but I'm getting better." You tell him truthfully. 

"Was it bad?" 

You run a hand through your hair. "Awful. No yelling, we never liked to yell just lots of crying. I did the crying, and he did the heartbreaking." 

He nods and hands you another shot that you accept happily. 

"I was so lost the first week that I thought about moving from the state, the country." You laugh at the thought now. "But here is home, at least for now." 

"Have you seen him? I know he always disliked me."

"That is true, could never get him to see you were just Jess to my Cece." 

"Obviously, I was Cece." He fakes a hair flip.

"Well, of course, all I do is go home and break out singing to any song."

"Never change, buttercup." He kisses your head and then tenses up. 

"Think I'd be six feet under if laser eyes existed." 

"What makes you say that." You go to turn around, but he doesn't let you. 

"He's at a table with Alex. Drink in hand, looking our way, and he doesn't look happy. Do you think he's going to march this way?" His hold tight on you.

You groan and lay your head on his chest. "If he made eye contact with you, then yes, he'll be over soon, so that means you got to go find your girlfriend, and I need the bartender's attention." 

"Always a phone call away. We leave on Friday, dinner Wednesday." Jake walks away and quickly finds Annie. He whispers in her ear, and she looks your way. A big smile on her face and you blow her a kiss. She grabs it and stuffs it in her boobs. Annie's a weird one, but she's the best. 

Knowing he's watching you makes you uncomfortable. He wasn't supposed to be here, this was your night, and now you just want to cry, don't even care about drinking anymore. 

You walk out to the balcony and smile at the sight of the moon. LA doesn't allow much stargazing, but the moon always shines bright. Now would be a perfect time for a smoke, except you don't do that. Always were miss goody-two-shoes.

"Nice night." His voice interrupts your thoughts. "A bit chilly for Los Angeles." The deep, smooth voice sends chills down your body, not the weather.

"Weather is always unpredictable here." You mutter.

"How you've been," Harry asks, stepping closer. 

"Fabulous." 

Sarcastic answer. How typical of you. 

"I haven't been that good either." 

You're close to tears. "What do you want, Harry?"

"I wanted to check on you. Haven't seen you at any gathering of our friends." He twists his H ring, keeping his hands busy. "Bit worried." 

"They're your friends, don't get no right going anymore." 

Harry's three steps away. "Not true, everyone in there cares for you. Just because we-" He stops.

He can't even say it. He broke up with you, and he can't even say it. 

"They all love you."

"Yeah, well, I wish I loved myself." 

Harry flinches as if you've slapped him. The words hurt him, but not as much as they hurt you. 

"Don't say that, love." 

You turn to him. "I'm sure you want to be friends, and that's great, but I can't now." You let your tears run down your face, not caring that he can see. "I love you, and I was sure you were it for me, but I can't stand being around you without wanting your arms around me. I can't see you talk to everyone yet, not talk to me, but most importantly, I hate that I don't get to be the one going home with you anymore." 

Harry remains quiet. Green eyes are filled with tears. 

"You have to understand." 

"No" You step close to him, heart close to beating out of your chest. "You have to understand that you destroyed us for your career. To benefit yourself, not caring what you broke along the way. It's been one month, and all I can think is that I'm not good enough for Harry Styles, the rockstar. No, he needs another famous person on his arm, not an elementary school teacher who doesn't own a pair of Gucci shoes."

"Please let me," Harry's voice cracks.

"A year. Twelve months. 365 days. All for what, all for nothing. "I love you," and "we'll have a small wedding." It was all a lie. I was just kept around for fun while you took a break from touring. Maybe I'll be good enough to write a song about."

"You don't get to do that." He cries.

"Why not!" You tell. "You broke up with me with no warning out of the blue. We had sex on the kitchen counter, and fourteen hours later, you broke my heart." You have so much sadness and anger, and you know you're close to drowning. "I had no choice but to let you go, but for all I know, you've let go of me weeks before." 

"I don't know what to say." 

"You're not the man I thought you were." You walk away from the hand on the door. Your back to him, his shoulders are shaking in sobs. "That's the most disappointing thing, you lost yourself in the industry now you're just one of them." 

You walk out and catch Julia's eyes. She goes to step forward but stops herself when she sees you shake your head no. You can name everyone in that room, but you know that at the end of the day they'll pick Harry. 

It hurts, but all one can do is pick themselves up and move on.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

The days go by slow, but Summer has finally arrived. The California heat is only rising, but it’s a cooler day, and you're at the beach when you look over at your sister laughing as her husband splashes her with water. 

Your stomach twists in the worst ways possible, you're jealous and green isn't a good color. You've spent most of the time caring for your two nephews seeing as your sister and husband worked not that you minded you did have the summer off. 

It's been four months since the breakup, and some days it feels like it was yesterday. The pain comes crashing back when you wake up and stretch your hand out to touch him but tense up because you know when you open your eyes, he won't be there. 

Malibu beach is not a place you've frequented, but little Ty asked for this specifically, and none of you never learned how to tell him no. 

You close your book and grab your phone from the bottom of the bag. Slip your hoodie over your head, the breeze picking it up, and adjust your black shorts. You signal to Tess that you're going for a walk and that you have her phone. She sends a thumbs up. There you go on a walk with your back towards the sun. 

It's funny, before dating Harry you walked the beach every Sunday on your own. Enjoying the laugh of families and the seagulls flying high. Then he joined you and together hand in hand, you'd walk down talking and sometimes just taking in the silence allowing the waves to do all the talking for you. Towards the end, he'd convince you to stay in and cuddle him, and beach Sunday became cuddle Sundays. You can’t remember a time you did go on a walk alone again when you were with him. 

In the end, you lost both. Lost Harry and lost the love of the ocean because of the painful memories tied to it. With time you must remember the things lost and changed, but this is something you're reclaiming. Routine is constant and good. It gives stability and strength. 

"Sweetie," you hear someone yell but keep on walking. It's probably a child going in too deep. 

You stop when you hear your name being yelled and turn expecting to see Tess but instead are met with kind blue eyes. A sincere smile on her face. It's Anne. 

"Oh dear, thought it was you." She says. 

"Hi, Anne." You say a bright look of surprise on your face. 

Anne steps in close and puts her arms around you in a big hug. A mother's embrace is one you've longed for and will continue to long for the rest of your life. Anne treated you as a daughter from the moment you met, and that's something you're sad to have lost. 

"You look so tan, how long have you been in town?" You ask, admiring her as you pull away. 

"A week. Came down to visit Harry." She offers a small smile at the name of her son.

"That's great. Summer's a good time to enjoy the ocean here." Anne nods, agreeing. "How were you able to spot me?" You ask genuinely surprised she was able to do so. 

"I'd recognize you anywhere. The yellow jumper helped."

You look down and chuckle. "It does shout "look at me."" 

You stand there a few more seconds looking around nervous to ask her to join you, but you really liked her company, and as much as you like being alone now was not the time.

"I was just walking down, would you like to join me?" You look down at your toes afraid she'd say no. 

"Oh, yes, my dear. Sounds fantastic." 

She takes a step forward, and off you go. It's quiet, not the uncomfortable kind, but allows you to get lost in your own thoughts with no pressure of not starting a conversation. Your thoughts are calm, it might be the ocean or Anne, but you're grateful. Losing Harry wasn't just losing him, it was losing everyone that he introduced you to. You were friends for over a year before you started to date. You met Anne a month into the friendship, and it was easy. She doted on you for your kind and quiet nature. She had said something about your aura being pure. 

You didn't have a mom, she died when you were three in a car accident. Your dad being in and out of rehab but enough to keep the roof over your head. Once Tess turned eighteen, she got an apartment and moved you both in. At eleven years old, you got the call your dad died. Tess adopted you, and ever since then, it was the two of you. That is until she met Andrew in a biology class. He helped Tess pass with an A. Turns out that he was studying to be a doctor. They started dating once the semester was over and didn't look back. Tess was always a good student, maintaining A's and B's while caring for you. Andrew learned of the situation and didn't leave like most people would do no, he stayed right there. He became a constant and even began to help with school work and projects. You always told Tess that you were preparing her to be a great mom. Andrew's family was very accepting of Tess; they treated her as their own, but you never felt like you belonged. It was the perfect family, but you didn't see where you fit in. Tess knew that, but she reminded you that she wasn't going to walk away from you that you would always be her number one. To this day, it stands true, obviously falling a little under her children, but love still strong. 

But with Anne, she didn't see you as someone broken or lost but someone who needed a bit more love. Love is what she has given you, she became your friend, someone you could trust in along with Gemma. It felt like your world was falling apart when Harry broke up with you because you couldn't turn to them, and your sister had her family to worry about. You always were good at becoming unseen when needed. Never wanting to be a bother. Except, here with her by your side, you don't know how you're supposed to let her go. 

Anne stops walking and takes a seat in the sand, placing her sandals by her side, and you join her without questioning her. 

"I waited for your phone call. Every day for the past week when Harry gave me the news even though I knew you wouldn't call." Anne cleared her throat softly. "I hoped you would."

You sigh. Those words were enough to bring tears to your eyes. You thought you were dried out of tears, but you were wrong. "I was close on many nights but- I-I it felt wrong too. He's your son, how could I do that to him?"

"He may be my son, but you're important too. My heart has enough space in there for you in a relationship with him or not."

You nod. Trying to wrap that around your head that she loves you even though Harry does not.

"The breakup came out of nowhere. The day before we're fine talking about adopting a cat and the next, he sits me down to tell me we're breaking up." You block the memories trying to resurface and trace small circles on the sand. 

You did out a seashell and cleaned it off before asking your question.

"Did he tell you why he was doing it?" It hurts to ask, but you need to know if he was honest with her.

Anne sighs but nods. "He said that it wasn't going to work out. You couldn't handle the public eye anymore and that it would only continue to affect you and your job. Said something about not fitting the image." 

A tear falls down, but you're quick to wipe it away. "He sat me down and told me we were breaking up. Didn't let me ask why or anything. A year together is nothing in this industry, we barely made it a month to the public eye. You'll be forgotten quickly, also tell me that because he was working on the new album, he needed an image more than the one he had." 

"That's not who I raised him to be," Anne says, disappointment evident in her voice.

"Although he broke my heart, I still love him. I still love him as much as I did when we first got together. I just don't trust him." 

Anne grabs your hand and links it together. She anchors you together because although she knows that she said you can count on her, this would most likely be the end of your relationship. Neither of you wants to admit it. 

"It's funny, the first month I avoided every place we ever went together, and it was hard because we did a lot around here. There are roads I avoid completely. This is my second time back at this beach, and I loved it here." You run a hand through your tangled hair due to the ocean breeze. "But now I'm going back to these places, and I pray every time I get out of the car not to run into him even though that's exactly what I want to happen. It's cliche, I know, but I really did lose my best friend." The tears are falling silently, and you are grateful Anne doesn't comment on it, but you swear you can see her eyes glisten. You rest your head on her shoulder and look out at the waves, no clouds in sight, just a clear blue sky. How you wish your brain would look this blank. 

There's so much you want to tell Harry now months after the breakup, but there's the fear of breaking down in front of him.

"Anne" 

"Yes, darling." She responds softly. 

"I-I uh-" You clear your throat. "If I were to give you a letter to Harry, would you give it to him. There are some things I need to get off my chest, and he needs to know." 

"That I can do." 

You sit up and grab both her hands and bring them to your chest. She looks at your love and sadness in her eyes. "You can only give it to him when you know he's better. He will need to hear this later when our hearts don't ache as much. When you as a mom realize he needs it. It'll be the closure we both need."

"I promise."

You make plans to meet for breakfast the next morning as she has no plans and knows he's busy. You'll deliver the letter and be on your way, closing that door behind you. You spend half an hour together more before you walk her down to the pier and make your way back to your sister. Heart heavy but not as broken.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

You roll over and smile when you see Harry still asleep. He's lying on his stomach, and his head turned in your direction. You lay on your side, happy to admire him. There's a hint of a smile on his face, must be from the dream he is having. His long eyelashes resting on his cheeks, looking delicate and fragile. Not an inch of stress on his face. You can't help yourself and bring your index finger up to trace over his plump pink lips. Soft. You stop when you see him twitch a little but continue when he lets out a small snore. The room is quiet; your apartment is not located on a busy street, something your sister said was a must for when your nephews came to stay. You let Harry rest and get up going to the living room. You sit on the floor looking out at the window at the birds flying around, chirping away basking in the morning sun. You hear the creek of your door and know Harry is on his hunt for you. He's clumsy, so you won't be surprised if he crashes into the couch. He still must be tired. You hear a quiet "shit" and let out a chuckle. He stumbled around the corner with his misplaced shoes. You don't comment on it knowing he'd just turn the blame on you because he got out of bed for you. 

"Poppet, after last night, I thought you'd like to wake up in my arms." Harry sits behind you, the blanket wrapped around him now being placed over you as he drags you into his lap. 

"I'm an early riser, you know that." 

He sighs into your ear. "Means I didn't tire you out enough last night."

"Oh no, you did just that. The bruises are proof."

He laughs and kisses your neck lightly three times. 

"Coffee in the kitchen if you want some. Also, some muffins Gabby bought me for taking her dog on the hike with me."

"I want something else for breakfast." He whispers into your ear. His hand sliding up your thigh. He's met with your black shorts, he knows there is nothing underneath seeing as he put these on for you. "Will you let me?"

"Only cause you asked nicely." 

Harry is quick to lay you on your back. Your shorts come off just as quickly, he pushes your shirt up to expose your breasts. He sits back on his knees and allows you to see how hard he is in his shorts.  

"You're beautiful" He breathes out. "A true dream." 

"You told me that last night repeatedly." You remind him how he whispered in your ear at dinner with your friends around how the red dress had him hard as soon as he saw you walk in. You knew that if he picked you up, you would not have left your apartment. The night ended precisely how you wanted with Harry in your bed. Three months dating, it felt right. 

It was perfect. 

He leans in, placing small kisses on your calves, slowly moving up to your thighs. He kissed last night's bruises gently, a reminder of how rough he got once he got a taste of you. It drove him crazy. 

"Smell so sweet." He dragged his lips up to your core. His tongue between your folds, you moan softly under him. He pressed little kisses to your clit, you felt him smiling against you when he felt your thighs begin to tremble.

You let out a louder moan when he slipped a finger inside, your hands reached down to grasp at his hair. He pulled back to look up at you with dark eyes, smiling at you with wet lips. 

"You're a tease, baby." You breathe out as he slips in a second finger. He moves slowly, building up the pressure. 

He brings his mouth back down to your clit, gently grazing his teeth over it. 

"Oh, fuck!" You gasp. 

"C'mon poppet, come for me." A moan leaves your lips when his tongue picks up speed, making up for the loss of his fingers. "Please, let go for me."

You grip his hair harder, letting your orgasm take over your whole body. His tongue slowing down as you throw your head back and lay your hands on your side. He slowly works you through it until he sees your breathing come down, gentle kisses to your hips. He works up until he gets to your breasts. He leans in kissing each one gently. "Sorry, I neglected these beauties. I got so lost in you." 

Harry continues to move slowly, but you have had enough of slow. You pull him up into your arms, until he settles on top and kiss him until it leaves you breathless. 

You taste yourself on him, Harry kissing you harder as your hand begins to trail down to his shorts. He breaks the kiss and leans your head left, giving him more access to your neck, which he accepts quickly. He's slow and gentle compared to last night. 

"Going to let me make love to you, poppet." You nod wishing he'd move quicker as he kicks his shorts away. 

“Yes” You whisper, he’s building up the anticipation. 

He lines himself up, slowly pushing in. You let out a whispered fuck at his size. He goes in gently, not wanting to hurt you, always wanting you to feel good. 

Harry leans forward, kissing you as he begins to move against you. 

"Baby," You breathe out. "B-baby-y-y faster." 

Harry keeps your lips close, his breathing picking up. Whispered words against your lips. “I'm going to make love to you for the rest of my life. It's you and me, poppet." 

Your eyes shoot open, and you're quick to look around. You're in bed, left side empty. 

He's not here. 

He hasn't been here for months. Why does he keep coming back? Your brain needs to let him go, but you know that isn't the one holding on to him. 

You get out of bed and walk to the kitchen for a glass of water. There has never been an easy way to move on. This letter might be the best start.

 Harry,

I love you. I'll always love you. 

That's hard to stay, but it's the truth. You are my best friend. Remember the first time we talked on the phone and how we didn't want to hang up, so we talked about everything. From my first broken bone to your job at a bakery. You told me all about your childhood and all your dreams. At that time, I thought I would be at your side cheering you on as you were accomplishing them but that’s not the case. Just know that I'll be rooting for you.

I'm sorry I didn't fight for you. Guess it seemed like I didn't love you, but I did. I do. I think only ever having my sister on my side, I never realized I never learned to fight for those I love. Never doubt my love, it's real.

Don't be afraid to move on and love again, you deserve it. You deserve the greatest love out there. 

Remember, just because you love summer doesn't mean it can stay because who knows what October can bring. 

Maybe one day we'll find a way back into each other's lives, but until then, take care, H. 

Y/N

You put it in the envelope and seal it. You write his name on the front. 

It's time to close the chapter, time to move onto the next. 

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

October has finally rolled in, and you couldn't be more excited. Autumn brings in the cold and the changing of the leaves, but if you were to ask the students, it just means candy. For the month each Friday, a new activity is done in honor of Halloween. Your classroom is decorated in pictures drawn of your student's favorite movies. As well as small pumpkin string lights your sister gifted you last year. Your classroom door has black paper covering it and white ghosts—22 one for each student with their name on them stuck to it. You added caution tape to give it more detail. Then added small pumpkins around. It reads "Spooky Students" the class had a good laugh at the name, proper pleased. 

The first week was simple, doing a math game. 

Candy corn math. 

The children enjoyed it, all having fun adding and subtracting. Tina ate one and almost cried because she thought she'd get in trouble. You assured her it was all for fun. Then let them all eat their treats as you played them Halloween music. Fridays are meant to relax and have fun. That's exactly what you show your students. 

The second week they make spider headbands. Grace, your teacher assistant, helps with the cutting and stapling. The students enjoy gluing the spider's eyes most. It's an easy project when the students are focused on it. You have an hour of the day left and decide to play, It's the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown. It's starting, and as you're organizing the glues and packing away the scissors in their pencil boxes, Nicole, the front desk assistant, tells you there's a package you have to sign for. You nod to Grace to look over the class, and she gives you a thumbs up in return. As you reach the main office, you see a baker with two boxes chatting with Matthew Collins, the Vice-Principal. 

"Good afternoon gentlemen, I assume this is for me." You say, pointing to the pink boxes. 

"Good afternoon, got your kids treats, I see." He acknowledges. 

You shake your head, stepping to look at the note sitting on top of the box. You flip it open. 

Figured you and the children deserved a sweet treat. Take care, honey. xx Anne 

PS: A dozen snickerdoodle cookies are waiting for you at home. 

Anne, always so sweet and thoughtful. You had kept in contact with her after that time you handed her the letter. You came to realize you couldn't lose her, and she wasn't about to let you go without a fight. 

"A good friend actually sent them, knows how excited we get for October." You tuck the note in your cardigan pocket. 

"Well, that's a great friend to have. I hope your class and you enjoy it. Have a great weekend." Mr. Collins leaves, and you bid goodbye to the baker. 

As you make your way back to your class with two dozen cupcakes, you can't wipe the grin on your face. They are going to be so excited. The cupcakes are half chocolate and half vanilla. The orange frosting swirled beautifully on each one, each topped with a spider ring. 

You return, and all the kids are focused on the scene when Sally begins to yell at Linus as he's waking up for making her miss the Halloween festivities. Grace is quick to help you tell the kids you have a surprise for them all. The movie still plays as Grace places napkins on their desks. 

"A friend sent me a treat for you all because she heard how wonderful you've been doing." You tell them slowly approaching closer for them to see the box in your hand. "Say, do any of you like cupcakes." Cheers filled the room with your words. 

You both worked fast to give them each a cupcake of choice, no arguing whatsoever. Kind students you have. Grace grabs chocolate, and you grab the last vanilla for yourself. Grace lets you know she's going to get waters from the cafeteria to give to them. 

You sit at the back counter legs cup, leaning against a llama poster that says, "We love learning." A small gift for Julia. You grab the cupcake and fix your spider headband before taking a picture to send to Anne. 

Y/N: Cupcakes were a real success. I can't thank you enough. Love you, xx.

Anne: Don't you look precious. 

Anne: Glad, you all enjoyed it. Love you xx

It's an excellent way to end the week with a sweet treat from Anne and good old classic Charlie Brown. 

It is now the third week. The four first grade classes made a trip to the pumpkin patch. The school budget did get slightly raised this year, allowing you to buy small easy to carry pumpkins for each student. Parent chaperones are enabling you to make smaller groups to take each student to different activities. Your small group of six decided on the slide mountain that was atop of bales. It was fun, even going down yourself. Then that led you to picking pumpkins. Joey has trouble deciding before leaving the slightly bigger one when his arms got tired. You decided to get two big ones and two small pumpkins to take to your sister's house and you could carve together this weekend. It was now your turn for the hayride, and Chloe was really excited. She was the first one on, and as the trip went on, her head kept turning, wanting to see it all. This place really outdoes themselves each year, decorations only getting better. As it was closing time to go back to school, all students sat at the tables awaiting their apple cider and cinnamon-sugar donuts. 

You were about to take a seat next to Henry, the shyest student in your class when your name is called. You turn around and see Jeff, Harry's manager, and friend. 

"Hi Jeff," You step close and accept the hug he offers. 

"How have you been?" He asks.

You nod. "Good, welcoming the cold weather."

"It is nice."

Your grin begins to fade slightly as the small talk gets awkward. It's been a long time since you've seen Jeff. Not at all, forgetting how important a friend he was to you as well as Glenne. 

"What brings you here?" 

"On a class field trip." You gesture to the table behind you, seeing the kids sneak glances at you. 

"That is wonderful, good class this year?" 

You grin thinking about each of your students. "The best."

"Her cider is getting cold." Susan whispers, the small wide-eyed blonde says to Joey, worrying for you. 

"I've got to go back, probably going to bomb me in questions as soon as I sit."

"Of course." Jeff smiles in understanding.

"Tell Glenne I say hello. Take care, Jeff." 

You turn around, heading to the table. You laugh as your students quiet down as you take a seat. 

"Alright, what do you want to know now?"

The students always take your mind off everything. No conversation is ever dull, still trying their best to find out more about their teacher. 

Although seeing Jeff was nice, he's not the person you wished to run into every day. 

No, that someone has beautiful brown curls and emerald green eyes. 

The end of day breezes by, back in the classroom, the students grabbed their backpacks and walked out front to meet their parents. As you tidy up the classroom, Grace walks in a tight smile on her face. You know she has something to ask, but don't pressure her to do so. 

"Was that man a friend, we saw you with," Grace asks, wiping down the desks, "mom's were gossiping, thinking you were being asked out or was an old flame. Don't have to tell me, but he did look like a friend, at least an old one." 

You close your planner, happy with the coming week's plan. "My ex's friend.." You explain. "We were close. He was always kind and welcoming. Lost a lot of people during the breakup." 

She shoots you a small smile. "Never easy, but you don't get through it alone. Some people are meant to come into your life as lessons." 

Grace's optimism never fails to make you grin. "That is really nice to hear." 

"I keep waiting for the grand gesture for my ex to sweep me off my feet." Talking about this, tears at your heart, but it has weighed you down. "I just want to run into him. Go to our favorite places in hopes of seeing him even just for a moment." 

"That means you're not ready to put yourself out there?" Her voice was full of curiosity.

"Correct. I love Harry, I always will, but my heart seems to be holding on for some reason." 

"I'm a phone call away if you ever want to get drunk and watch movies and eat our weight in food." She offers sincerely.

"I'll keep that in mind." 

Grace bids you goodbye and walks out. It's nice to be reminded you have people around you supporting you, but all you want today is to see the sunset and you know just the spot.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*     ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Malibu is known for having the best spots for the ocean view and standing here, a blanket wrapped around you, hearing the waves continue to crash with the rocks below you believe it is. You came here because you know not many people know about this location and if the other two cars there say anything about it continues to be unknown. 

Growing up in Southern California, you have always been grateful to have the ocean nearby. You and your sister would always make your way here to celebrate good days or to clear your head. You spent your day here when you got accepted into UCLA and when Andrew proposed to Tess. This place is full of good memories; it's like being there all the bad in your life disappears. Bringing Harry here for the first time was a big step in your relationship, it was you letting him get to know you, no barriers in the way. 

You hear a car pull up, but don't bother looking over thinking the person might be heading down the trail. It's a couple, and you can hear the girl whisper something then heads off to the dirt trail. You're not sure how long you stand there when you take one final look before unwrapping the blanket and placing it in your trunk. Just as you are about to close it, you hear your name called. 

You turn around quickly and are surprised to see him. You weren't even aware he was here, last you heard he was on the last leg of his world tour. 

He's dressed in a black Columbia hoodie, grey Nike shorts, and black running shoes. His hair has beautiful long curls, and he's got a clean-shaven face, always made him look younger but does give a good view of his strong jawline.

"Harry," You breathe out. 

Your heart is beating so fast you think it might jump out of your chest. You've been waiting for the day you run into him, but it was not today.

It might be the worst day. After a field trip with first graders, no one is making out as clean as they arrived that morning. Your lavender knitted sweater has sugar stains, and your old blue jeans have dirt on your knees from kneeling to help with the pumpkins. You wore old black converse never bothered with the dust, but this time you wish you had your back up pair. You don't even want to imagine how your hair looks. You snap out of your thoughts when Harry stops giving you a once over and breaks the silence.

"I always seem to find my way here." He tells you, looking down at his shoes. 

You sit in your open trunk of your CR-V and scoot over to let him know to sit. He does so without saying more. It's a heavy silence, but you don't give it much thought looking out at the ocean. 

"I got your letter." 

The letter you wrote four months ago. If you're honest, you didn't think back to that since you handed it over to Anne. 

"When?" You questioned.

"Two weeks ago," He looks over at you, staring at you, waiting for you to look over at him. "How long did mum have it?"

You lock eyes with him, his eyes filled with curiosity and kindness. "Since June." You look away, not able to take in all the emotions coming up. "Guess you were finally ready for it."

Harry nods and stands up, and he walks a few steps before making his way back to stand in front of you. He looks nervous about sharing, and all you can do is offer him a smile. He lets out a deep breath. 

"I went on this date that Jeff set up for me, and it was awful. Nice girl, but everything felt wrong. It was wrong." He runs a hand through his loose curls as if to get rid of the nerves. "I looked at her, closed my eyes, and opened them, and the person I wanted it to be was not in front of me." 

Harry's looking at you as you try to wrap your head around his words. You don't know how to respond. He was waiting for you, but he was the one who left you. 

"You didn't realize it until then?" You're confused. It took him eight months to realize he made a mistake. 

He stares right at you, not wanting you to miss his next words. "I realized it the second you walked out the door." 

Your face drops at his words. 

Harry runs a hand down his face before taking a step forward. "I tried to find you. I would go all over Los Angeles hoping to run into you, but I stopped after the party when you told me the truth." 

"I was harsh, felt awful at how I handled it afterward." 

"Don't apologize," he gives you a half-smile, "I deserved that. Honestly, I needed it." 

You both go silent. You're staring at one another, memorizing each other's faces that you had begun to forget. You could stare at Harry forever, and you always told him that he had a face one could get lost in forever, finding new details to memorize. 

"Do you even remember that night?" You ask because you know you do. It used to haunt your dreams until it didn't. That day no longer lingers at the back of your head, but if you think back to it, all the emotions come again, hitting you harder than ever.

Harry sighs, "Every time I close my eyes." 

You walk into your apartment, surprised at the quietness. Harry always liked to have music playing. He's sitting on the couch staring at the black screen of his phone. 

"H, ready to cook dinner, got home early because you said you wanted lasagna tonight. Always faster when we cook together." Stepping closer to see why he's sitting so still on the couch. 

"Sit with me." He whispers, patting the seat next to him. 

You sit down, reaching to grab his hand, and he lets you. He squeezes it tightly before letting go. 

"I love you." His eyes meet yours. He looks in pain. "But I'm breaking up with you."

A million thoughts run through your head. Harry's breaking up with you. He's leaving you.

He looks at you, waiting for you to say something. "It's not easy for me, but it's what's best for my career. I will be going back on tour soon, releasing a single. You wouldn't handle all the attention with paparazzi well, so I'm saving you. It's easier for others in the business, but you wouldn't survive this" 

His words cut daggers into your heart.

It's best for my career.

It keeps repeating in your head, his job, he doesn't think you're enough for his lifestyle. You weren't enough to keep him happy.

"Harry, it doesn't-" The tears are rolling down your face, you can tell he wants to reach over to wipe them, but he holds himself back. "So this is it?" 

He nods. "The end for us, but we can-" You cut him off before he can say, friends. 

You already had him in your life as a friend. You can't go back to that not after knowing how he loves being the little spoon, how much he loves his hair being played with, but most importantly, how kind and gentle of a lover he is. He has so much love to give and do not receive that any more will break your heart: no kisses, no hugs, and no love. 

You grab your keys, bag, and slip your shoes on. "Goodbye, Harry." 

He stands eyes red, he looks sad, but he has no right. He wanted this, not you. His house had become a second home, but now you feel like an unwelcome guest. You walk out without looking back each step towards your car, making you cry harder. 

This is the end. An end, you never saw coming.

It seems like you were both lost in the memory when you hear Harry begin to weep quietly. Your heart pulls you in two ways, wanting to comfort him or sitting there, letting him cry, but before you can decide, he's wiping his tears.

He lifts his head to meet your eyes, his eyes keep filling with tears, but he doesn't bother to wipe them anymore. "Are you happy?" he whispered.

You nod a small smile on your face to assure him. "I am. I'm not sad and miserable anymore, but I'm also not filled with sunshine. I lost a lot when we broke up; you have to know that," He nods letting you know he's listening. "I also found myself, found love I lost over the years. Found love in me." 

He smiles when he hears that his dimples were coming out. "That day at the party, I was in the worst place possible, but I reached out to my sister and told her I needed therapy. I wouldn't have gone if it weren't for my sister's support. Honestly, you were in the back of my mind because you shared to me how important and impactful it was for you, and I know I had so much to share not just from the breakup but from my childhood." 

"I'm glad." He chokes out his voice, rough from crying. 

"I am too." You smile because this is nice. All the running you did didn't allow you to talk with Harry, but the time has come, and you're grateful for that. 

"I wasn't planning on coming up here today, obviously," You gesture to your dirty clothes. "I had that pull to come here as soon as I was pulling out of the school parking." You confess to him.

"I finished a yoga class and was on my way home when I took the wrong exit," Harry corrects himself, "Or well the right turn looking at it now." 

You're not sure where you stand with Harry, but you both know the feelings are still there. As if they never left. 

"We can't pick up where we left off." 

Harry nods, agreeing. "In that case, may I take you out on a date Sunday?" 

"I'd love that, Harry." 

You stand up and pull him in for a hug. You know you surprise him because he tenses up before wrapping his arms around you. You sigh as you feel Harry squeeze you tight. He breathes you in, and you can't help but let out a small laugh. 

"Did you just sniff me?" You're laughing against his chest feeling his heartbeat pick up.

"Oi, don't laugh at me. You smell like strawberries." He defends. 

"Pretty sure I smell like dirt and sweat. A field trip running around kids will do that to you."

"I disagree." He pulls back to look down at you, but you keep your head on his chest, liking being in his arms. "Always smell great." 

You move to pull back, thinking it must be too much too soon for both of you, but Harry doesn't let you. He holds on tighter. "Couple more minutes, please love," He whispers against your hair. You nod and let him begin to sway you both gently as if you were both ones with the wind. 

"Is it too forward to ask to kiss you?" Harry asks timidly.

You lean back and laugh before looking up at him, his eyes hopeful but also knowing. "It is." 

"It was worth a shot." 

Harry leans in to gently press a kiss to your forehead, his lips soft. He steps back after a few seconds. "I'll call you."

You nod. "Please do."

Harry holds his car door open but makes no move to step in as if waiting for something. You don't want him to leave. 

"Harry," You call out. He turns around and shoots you a cheesy smile causing you to smile back. "I really want you to kiss me, trust me but," 

Harry nods in understanding. "Slow and steady, love." 

You stare at him, and his eyes are bright and hopeful. Hopeful in their future together. "Slow and steady, we can do that."

Just like that, you and Harry both drive away from each other, but your future together has never looked brighter.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

Thank you for reading! I love you 

Come talk to me and tell me what you thought of Into You 

[giorno-plays-piano]

The Pretender Next Door Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader Warning: Swearing. Summary: Lying is despicable, but nothing beats the humiliation of pretending you have a lovely boyfriend when, in fact, you have none. Could your handsome neighbor help you, though? Words: 1293. P.S. This is the first story I have ever published on Tumblr. And my first non-dark!story in English, ughh. _____________________________________ Part 1. They say that moving is one of the big causes of stress. You would agree, indeed, standing in the corridor and keeping the door open for the guys from relocation service. Now they were carrying your white drawer chest, and the moment you felt pity for them, sweaty and tired. You didn’t look any better, though. Sometimes you still wondered why you decided to move to New York, of all places. You couldn’t stay a day more in Key West, but there were many more locations you could choose. Why New York? You had always hated huge cities, the terrible noise from busy streets, subway trains stuffed with people, and dirty fast food restaurants with rats in the kitchens. Yes, this job you were offered looked nice and was well-paid, but you could find the other one. Why New York? Maybe because you craved to change your life so much you didn’t want any half measures. Anyway, you were free to move again if anything would not go as you expected it to, right? “Thank you,” you said awkwardly when the guys put the drawer where you showed them. “So, we’re almost done.” One of them wiped the sweat from his brow and tilted his head. “There’s just one bookcase left.” “Yeah, thanks.” They went into the corridor while you stayed inside your new apartment, looking on the white walls and a big open window in your living room. In fact, this window was the reason you chose this place, full of light and fresh air. The building wasn’t new, and the neighborhood didn’t look very pretty but it was more or less safe. Besides, subway was relatively close meaning it would not be hard to get to your new job. You sighed. What were you doing with your life? Where were you going? Did you actually want to have a new job? Could you handle being away from the place you loved and hated the most? The place you called home for more than 20 years. You stepped into the corridor again and opened greyish door, thinking about scrubbing and washing it with a soap right after moving the furniture. Maybe then you would go and have a bath yourself: you looked awful, tired after a long trip, no makeup, your hair in a loose bun. Not that you cared, anyway. You were not expecting any guests today or, in fact, in any other day. You did not know a soul in New York. Apparently, you forgot there were still people around you. When you snapped out of your thoughts, you suddenly saw a tall guy with blonde hair and a breathtaking smile. He had probably said something that you missed, but the only thing you did in return was bumping your back against that greyish door of yours. Damn. He wasn’t even intimidating or scary – on the contrary, the stranger looked like that pretty boy from a typical romcom – yet you backed away like a coward instead of introducing yourself. “Oh, I’m so sorry!” The guy apologized immediately, obviously concerned with making you uncomfortable. “Did I startle you? I’m really sorry!” “No, no, it’s alright.” You felt deeply ashamed. The stranger belonged to the type of guys you never talked to; to be honest, he was the type you never even looked upon, too handsome and glowing like a giant sun. “I’m sorry for spacing out like that. It’s my fault. Please don’t mind me, I’m probably gonna be your weirdest neighbor. ”Your weirdest neighbor? Is this what you were really ought to say to a guy like him? Like, seriously, girl? “Ah, I doubt it. We have a guy who sing songs from Bridget Jones Diary every Friday and a woman who wants to marry a tree.” God, his smile was contagious, and you involuntarily grinned when he let out laugh. “I’m Steve. I live right next door to you.” “My name is Y/N. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Steve.” You finally relaxed a bit and tried to be friendly with the first person you met in New York. “Sorry about this, I’m not very social and I can be a bit awkward. But I don’t know any songs from Bridget Jones and I only have platonic feelings for trees.” “Then I’m sorry to say you lost your chance to be the weirdest! Didn’t expect a competition here, did you?” Now you were really laughing loud at his words. Steve had a nice sense of humor, and he was seemingly enjoying your reaction. Well, maybe moving here wasn’t as bad as you thought? You had at least one very good-looking neighbor who was friendly enough to go and have a small chat with you.  Oh, who you were trying to kid? A pretty guy living next door probably meant you were going to have many sleepless nights because of all the girls he would fuck right behind the wall of your room. Steve looked like a movie star with his broad shoulders, tout body and that gleaming white smile of his. He was literally radiating disarming masculinity in his white t-shirt and simple blue jeans as you stared at him, now feeling a bit bashful.  You were ready to kiss two guys carrying your bookshelf once they broke the silence with their heavy panting. Both Steve and you hurriedly moved to the sides of the corridor to give them more space.  “I wanted to ask if you need any help.” Your neighbor was smiling again. “You know, if you decide to move your bed or drawer from one wall to another, anything like that.” “Oh, thank you, but I’m ok, guys are almost d…” With that you heard a loud bang and an instant cursing: the bookshelf they were holding suddenly slipped from the arms of one of the guys, and the second one was forced to drop the bookshelf too. Horrified, you watched how it fell to the floor and broke down with several shelves flying to the carpet in your hallway. God, something just had to go wrong. “Shit.” One of the guys groaned. “My hand slipped. I’m sorry, miss.” “I’m gonna fucking kill you, Jake!” The other one was nearly screaming at him. “What the Hell?! Slipped? Do you know you practically threw this thing at me?!” “Pat, I’m sorry, I mean… Dammit, what are we gonna do now? ”You bit down on your lip and came closer to look at the damage. Apparently, you would need to find someone who could repair your bookshelf now or go straight to Ikea. More expenses. Great. “Well, at least you’re unharmed.” You sighed and tried to smile, still thinking of who you should even call for fixing furniture. “As for the bookshelf, it’s ok, I’ll think of something. I’m not going to call the company, don’t worry.” They were gone in five minutes after numerous awkward apologies and many thank you’s, and then you realized Steve was still there, standing silently on the very same spot. For some reason you felt guilty. Did he feel obliged to stay because of your little incident? Did you have to say something? Well, as a matter of fact, you did, but what there was to say? “Sorry, man, please come back when I’ll get my shit together?” When you spaced out again, your handsome neighbor came closer and squatted down near your unfortunate bookshelf, taking one of the pieces of the wood into his hands. “You know, I think it’s really easy to fix these ones. If you want, I can grab my tools and do it right now.” God, now you really hoped Steve would bring tons of girls to his apartment. He got to have some flaws, didn’t he?

[path-of-my-childhood]

USA Today: What Is Taylor Listening To?

Below is the list of all the songs that originally appeared on Brian Mansfield’s USA Today article “Taylor Swift is listening to...” (from November 12th 2008). Article and list of songs can still be accessed with the help of Wayback Machine, if the Flash is enabled in your browser. Enjoy!

A Fine Frenzy - Almost Lover

Acceptance - Different

Aerosmith - Dream On

Alana Grace - Black Roses Red

Alana Grace - Paranoid

Alanis Morissette - Hands Clean

Alison Krauss & Union Station - If I Didn't Know Any Better

Alison Krauss & Union Station - New Favorite

Amos Lee - Colors

Anna Nalick - Breathe (2 AM)

Anna Nalick - Catalyst

Anna Nalick - Forever Love

Anna Nalick - In The Rough

Anna Nalick - Paper Bag

Anna Nalick - Wreck Of The Day (Live)

Aslyn - Be The Girl

Augustana - Sweet and Low

Avril Lavigne - Fall To Pieces

Avril Lavigne - Why

Backstreet Boys - All I Have To Give

Backstreet Boys - Climbing The Walls

Backstreet Boys - Crawling Back To You

Backstreet Boys - Incomplete

BarlowGirl - Never Alone

Ben Folds - Landed

Ben Folds - The Luckiest

Ben Folds Five - Brick

Ben Jelen - Come On

Ben Lee - Catch My Disease

Better Than Ezra - Breathless

Better Than Ezra - Our Last Night

Beyoncé - If I Were A Boy

Beyoncé - Irreplaceable

Beyoncé - Me Myself And I

Beyoncé ft. Bun B, Slim Thug - Check On It

Big & Rich - Holy Water

Big & Rich - Save A Horse [Ride A Cowboy]

Billy Currington - Why, Why, Why

Billy Gilman - Clueless

Billy Joel - Uptown Girl

Billy Mack - Christmas Is All Around

Blake Shelton - Austin

Blake Shelton - Don’t Make Me

Blake Shelton - It Ain't Easy Bein' Me

Blake Shelton - Nobody But Me

Blink-182 - Feeling This

Blink-182 - What's My Age Again?

Blu Sanders - Like the Movies

Blu Sanders - We All Lose It

Blu Sanders - You By Her Side

Bone Crusher ft. Killer Mike, T.I. - Never Scared

Bonnie Somerville - Winding Road

Boys Like Girls - Hero/Heroine (Acoustic)

Boys Like Girls - Thunder

Brad Paisley - It Did

Brad Paisley - Whiskey Lullaby

Brandi Carlile - Fall Apart Again

Brandi Carlile - The Story

Brandi Carlile - Throw It All Away

Brandi Carlile - Turpentine

Brandi Carlile - What Can I Say

Brett Dennen - She's Mine

Britney Spears - (You Drive Me) Crazy (The Stop Remix!)

Britney Spears - Do Somethin’

Britney Spears - Everytime

Britney Spears - I Love Rock 'N' Roll

Britney Spears - I'm A Slave 4 U

Britney Spears - Lucky

Britney Spears - My Prerogative

Britney Spears - Outrageous

Britney Spears - Sometimes

Britney Spears - Toxic

Britney Spears ft. Pharrell Williams - Boys (Co-ed Remix)

Britney Spears ft. Ying Yang Twins - (I Got That) Boom Boom

Brooke Fraser - Deciphering Me

Bruce Robinson - All Over But The Cryin'

Bruce Robinson - Virginia

Cartel - Honestly

Chamillionaire ft. Krayzie Bone - Ridin'

Chantal Kreviazuk - In This Life

Chingy - Holidae In

Chris Brown - Gimme That

Chris Brown ft. Juelz Santana - Run It!

Christina Aguilera - Beautiful

Christina Aguilera, Lil' Kim, Mya, Pink - Lady Marmalade

Ciara - Get Up

Coheed and Cambria - The Suffering

Colbie Caillat - Battle

Colbie Caillat - Feelings Show

Colbie Caillat - Magic

Colbie Caillat - One Fine Wire

Colbie Caillat - Oxygen

Colbie Caillat - The Little Things

Coldplay - Sparks

Coldplay - The Scientist

Coldplay - Trouble

Coldplay - Yellow

Concrete Blonde - Joey

Corinne Bailey Rae - Put Your Records On

Courtney Jaye - Can You Sleep

Cyndi Thomson - I Always Liked That Best

Damien Rice - 9 Crimes

Damien Rice - Delicate (Live)

Damien Rice - The Blower's Daughter

Daniel Cage - Catch Me When I Fall

Daniel Powter - Bad Day

Daniel Powter - Jimmy Gets High

Dashboard Confessional - As Lovers Go

Dashboard Confessional - Ghost Of A Good Thing

Dashboard Confessional - Hands Down

Dashboard Confessional - Rapid Hope Loss

Dashboard Confessional - Secret

Dashboard Confessional - Stolen

Dashboard Confessional - Vindicated

Dave Barnes - Until You

David Banner ft. Magic, Lil Boosie - Ain't Got Nothing

David Gray - This Year's Love

David Mead - Nashville

Deana Carter - We Danced Anyway

Def Leppard - Armageddon It

Def Leppard - Bringin' On The Heartbreak

Def Leppard - Foolin'

Def Leppard - Hysteria

Def Leppard - Let's Get Rocked

Def Leppard - Love Bites

Def Leppard - Miss You In A Heartbeat

Def Leppard - Photograph

Def Leppard - Pour Some Sugar On Me

Def Leppard - Rocket

Del Amitri - Roll To Me

Dem Franchize Boyz - Ridin' Rims

Dem Franchize Boyz ft. Peanut & Charlay - Lean Wit It, Rock Wit It

Diana Anaid - Last Thing

Dido - Here With Me

Divinyls - I Touch Myself

Dixie Chicks - Cold Day in July

Dixie Chicks - Cowboy Take Me Away

Dixie Chicks - Easy Silence

Dixie Chicks - Godspeed (Sweet Dreams)

Dixie Chicks - Goodbye Earl

Dixie Chicks - Long Time Gone

Dixie Chicks - Lullaby

Dixie Chicks - Not Ready To Make Nice

Dixie Chicks - Top of the World

Dwight Yoakam - The Back Of Your Hand

Eagle-Eye Cherry - Save Tonight

Eamon - I Don't Want You Back

Emerson Drive - Fall Into Me

Eminem - Lose Yourself

En Vogue - Don't Let Go

Enrique Iglesias - Bailamos

Eva Cassidy - Songbird

Faith Hill - The Lucky One

Faith Hill - This Kiss

Fall Out Boy - Grand Theft Autumn

Fall Out Boy - Sugar, We're Goin Down

Family Force 5 - Love Addict

Fastball - Out Of My Head

Fefe Dobson - 8x10

Fefe Dobson - Bye Bye Boyfriend

Fefe Dobson - Don't Let It Go to Your Head

Fefe Dobson - Everything

Fefe Dobson - Revolution Song

Fefe Dobson - Rock It 'Til You Drop It

Fefe Dobson - Stupid Little Love Song

Fefe Dobson - Take Me Away

Foo Fighters - Best Of You

Fort Minor ft. Holly Brook & Jonah Matranga - Where'd You Go

Fountains of Wayne - All Kinds of Time

Frankie J ft. Baby Bash - Obsession (No Es Amor)

Gabrielle - Out Of Reach

Gary Allan - Life Ain't Always Beautiful

Gary Allan - Nickajack Cave

Gary Allan - Promise Broken

Gary Burr - What Mattered Most

Gavin DeGraw - (Nice to Meet You) Anyway

Gavin DeGraw - Belief

Gavin DeGraw - Chariot

Gavin DeGraw - Chemical Party

Gavin DeGraw - Follow Through

Gavin DeGraw - I Don't Want To Be

Gavin DeGraw - Just Friends

Gavin DeGraw - Meaning

Gavin DeGraw - More Than Anyone

Gavin DeGraw - Overrated

George Strait - Blue Clear Sky

George Strait - Carrying Your Love With Me

George Strait - Heartland

George Strait - I Can Still Make Cheyenne

George Strait - One Night At A Time

George Strait - Run

George Strait - The Best Day

Gin Blossoms - Found Out About You

Goo Goo Dolls - Here Is Gone

Goo Goo Dolls - Iris

Gorillaz - Feel Good Inc.

Grace Potter And The Nocturnals - Apologies

Gwen Stefani - Hollaback Girl

Gwen Stefani - The Sweet Escape

Heidi Newfield - Johnny And June

Hellogoodbye - Here In Your Arms

Hillary Lindsey - Over You

Hinder - Better Than Me

Hinder - Lips Of An Angel

Hope Partlow - Don't Go

Howie Day - Collide

Howie Day - She Says

Ingrid Michaelson - The Way I Am

Jack Ingram - Hold On

Jack Ingram - Make A Wish (Coming Home Again)

Jack Ingram - Maybe She'll Get Lonely

Jack Ingram - Measure Of A Man

Jack Johnson - Better Together

Jack Johnson - Good People

Jack Johnson - Taylor

Jake Owen - Eight Second Ride

Jake Owen - Ghosts

Jake Owen - Hard Not To Love You

Jake Owen - Startin' With Me

James Blunt - Carry You Home

James Blunt - Goodbye My Lover

James Blunt - You’re Beautiful

Jann Arden - Insensitive

Jason Aldean - Why

Jason Mraz - I’m Yours

JAY-Z ft. UGK - Big Pimpin'

Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah

Jem - 24

Jesse McCartney - Beautiful Soul

Jesse McCartney - Just So You Know

Jesse McCartney - The Best Day Of My Life

Jessica Andrews - Baby To Love You Once

Jessica Andrews - More To Me Than You

Jessica Andrews - More To Me Than You (acoustic)

Jessica Andrews - Second Sunday

Jet - Look What You've Done

Jewel - Good Day

Jewel - You Were Meant For Me

Jimmy Eat World - Hear You Me

Jimmy Eat World - If You Don’t, Don’t

Jimmy Eat World - The Middle

Joanna - All I Want For Christmas Is You

Joanna - Screaming Infidelities

Joanna - Ultraviolet

John Mayer - Comfortable

John Mayer - Slow Dancing in a Burning Room

John Mayer - Waiting On the World to Change

John Mayer - Your Body Is A Wonderland

Johnny Cooper - Everything

Johnny Cooper - Texas To You

Jon McLaughlin - Beautiful Disaster

Jonas Brothers - Burnin' Up

Jonas Brothers - Tonight

Jonas Brothers - Year 3000

Joseph Arthur - Honey And The Moon

Josh Kelley - Amazing

Josh Rouse - It's the Nighttime

Justin Timberlake - Cry Me A River

Justin Timberlake - What Goes Around Comes Around

K-Ci & JoJo - All My Life

KT Tunstall - Other Side Of The World

Kanye West - Diamonds From Sierra Leone

Kanye West ft. Jamie Foxx - Gold Digger

Kari Kimmel - Notice Me

Katie Herzig - Fool's Gold

Katie Herzig - Sweeter Than This

Katy Perry - Hot N Cold

Katy Perry - Thinking Of You

Keith Urban - Better Life

Keith Urban - I Told You So

Keith Urban - Making Memories Of Us

Keith Urban - Somebody Like You

Kelis - Brass In Pocket

Kelis - Milkhake

Kellie Pickler - Best Days Of Your Life

Kellie Pickler - Didn't You Know How Much I Loved You

Kelly Clarkson - Low

Kelly Clarkson - Miss Independent

Kelly Clarkson - Some Kind of Miracle

Kelly Clarkson - The Trouble With Love Is

Kenny Chesney - Big Star

LFO - Every Other Time

Landon Pigg - Can't Let Go

LeAnn Rimes - But I Do Love You

LeAnn Rimes - Damn

LeAnn Rimes - The Right Kind Of Wrong

LeAnn Rimes - This Love

LeAnn Rimes - You Are

Leigh Nash - Last Christmas

Lenny Kravitz - Again

Lenny Kravitz - American Woman

Lifehouse - Everything

Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz - Kings Of Crunk

Lil Scrappy - No Problem

Lil Scrappy ft Young Buck - Money In The Bank

Lil Wayne - Go DJ

Lisa Loeb - I Do

Little Big Town - Boondocks

Little Big Town - Bring It On Home

Liz Phair - Everything To Me

Liz Phair - Why Can’t I

Loretta Lynn - Fist City

Lori McKenna - Your Next Lover

Mandy Moore - I Wanna Be With You

Mannie Fresh - Real Big

Mark Wills - Take It All Out Of Me

Maroon 5 - Harder To Breathe

Maroon 5 - She Will Be Loved

Maroon 5 - Shiver

Maroon 5 - Tangled

Maroon 5 - This Love

Mat Kearney - All I Need

Mat Kearney - Nothing Left To Lose

Mat Kearney - Where We Gonna Go From Here

Matchbox Twenty - If You're Gone

Matchbox Twenty - Long Day

Matt Nathanson - I Saw

Matt Wertz - Everything's Right

Matt Wertz - Red Meets Blue

Melissa Etheridge - I'm The Only One

Meredith Brooks - Bitch

Metro Station - Now That We're Done

Metro Station - Shake It

Michelle Branch - Breathe

Michelle Branch - Goodbye To You

Mike Jones - Flossin'

Mindy Smith - Come To Jesus

Miranda Lambert - Bring Me Down

Miranda Lambert - Greyhound Bound For Nowhere

Miranda Lambert - Gunpowder And Lead

Miranda Lambert - Kerosene

Miranda Lambert - Mama, I'm Alright

Miranda Lambert - More Like Her

Miranda Lambert - What About Georgia?

Missy Higgins - Warm Whispers

Mozella - You Wanted It

Morgane Hayes - If Ever There Was

Morgane Hayes - Lonely Anywhere

Morgane Hayes - Train To Tupelo

Mr. Big - To Be With You

My Chemical Romance - Helena

Nelly - Grillz

Nick Lachey - I Can't Hate You Anymore

Nick Lachey - What's Left Of Me

Nickelback - Far Away

Nina Gordon - Tonight And The Rest Of My Life

Norah Jones - Turn Me On 

Oasis - Wonderwall

OneRepublic - Apologize

Our Lady Peace - Somewhere Out There

Pink - Just Like A Pill

Paramore - When It Rains

Paris Hilton - Nothing In This World

Pat Benatar - Anxiety (Get Nervous)

Pat Benatar - Fire And Ice

Pat Benatar - Heartbreaker

Pat Benatar - Hell Is For Children

Pat Benatar - Hit Me With Your Best Shot

Pat Benatar - I Need A Lover (live)

Pat Benatar - In The Heat Of The NIght

Pat Benatar - Little To Late

Pat Benatar - Looking For A Stranger

Pat Benatar - Love Is A Battlefield (demo)

Pat Benatar - My Clone Sleeps Alone

Pat Benatar - Precious Time

Pat Benatar - Promises In The Dark

Pat Benatar - Shadows Of The NIght

Pat Benatar - Treat Me Right

Pat Benatar - We Live For Love

Pat Benatar - Wuthering Heights

Pat Benatar - You Better Run

Patty Griffin - Burgundy Shoes

Patty Griffin - Christina

Patty Griffin - Goodbye

Patty Griffin - Heavenly Day

Patty Griffin - One Big Love

Patty Griffin - Peter Pan

Patty Griffin - Rain

Patty Griffin - When It Don’t Come Easy

Phil Collins - Can't Stop Loving You

Pitbull - Ay Chico (Lengua Afuera)

Pitbull - C**o

Plain White T's - Hate (I Really Don't Like You)

Plumb - Blush (Only You)

Plumb - Stranded

Rachael Yamagata - Be Be Your Love

Rachael Yamagata - Worn Me Down

Rachel Proctor - Didn't I

Rasheeda ft. Lil' Scrappy - Rocked Away

Ray Charles - I've Got A Woman

Rebecca Lynn Howard - Forgive

Rihanna - SOS

Rihanna ft. Jay-Z - Umbrella

Rilo Kiley - Portions for Foxes

Rob Thomas - Ever The Same

Rogue Wave - Eyes

Ronnie Day - Outside

Ronnie Milsap - It Was Almost Like A Song

Ronnie Milsap - My Life

Ronnie Milsap - Smoky Mountain Rain

Ronnie Milsap - (There's) No Gettin' Over Me

Ryan Adams - Come Pick Me Up

SHeDAISY - In Terms Of Love

Santigold - L.E.S Artistes

Sarah Connor - Bounce

Sarah McLachlan - Fallen

Sarah McLachlan - Stupid

Savage Garden - I Want You

Savage Garden - Truly Madly Deeply

Seal - This Could Be Heaven

Secondhand Serenade - Maybe

Semisonic - Closing Time

Shakira - Don’t Bother

Shakira - Underneath Your Clothes

Sheryl Crow - It's So Easy

Sheryl Crow - The First Cut Is The Deepest

Shop Boyz - Party Like A Rock Star

Sia - Breathe Me

Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars

Snow Patrol - Chocolate

Solange - Sandcastle Disco

Something Corporate - Ruthless

Space Girls - Wannabe

Staind - Everything Changes

Stephanie Chapman - Cowboy, I Tried

Stevie Nicks & Don Henley - Leather And Lace

Sunny Sweeney - Please Be San Antone

Survivor - Eye Of The Tiger

Susan Haynes - Bottle Rocket

T-Pain ft. Mike Jones - I'm N Luv (Wit A Stripper)

T.I. - Top Back

T.I. - What You Know

Teddy Geiger - I Feel Like Dancing

Teddy Geiger - Try To Hard

The All-American Rejects - Dirty Little Secret

The All-American Rejects - Swing, Swing

The Ataris - The Boys of Summer

The Calling - Wherever You Will Go

The Cardigans - I Need Some Fine Wine And You

The Corrs - Breathless

The Corrs - Summer Sunshine

The Fray - How To Save A Life

The Fray - Look After You

The Fray - Over My Head (Cable Car)

The Killers - Read My Mind

The Killers - When You Were Young

The Lemonheads - Into Your Arms

The Spill Canvas - All Hail The Heartbreaker

The Veronicas - 4ever

The Veronicas - Everything I'm Not

The Veronicas - When It All Falls Apart

The Wallflowers - Closer To You

The Wreckers - Cigarettes

The Wreckers - Crazy People

The Wreckers - Lay Me Down

The Wreckers - Leave The Pieces

The Wreckers - Stand Still, Look Pretty

The Wreckers - The Good Kind

The Wreckers - The Good Kind (acoustic)

Third Eye Blind - How's It Going To Be

Third Eye Blind - Semi-Charmed Life

Three 6 Mafia - Side 2 Side

Three Days Grace - I Hate Everything About You

Thriving Ivory - Angels On The Moon

Tila Tequila - I Love You

Tim McGraw - Angry All The Time

Tim McGraw - Can't Tell Me Nothin'

Tim McGraw - Guess You Get Used To Somebody

Tim McGraw - Telluride

Tim McGraw - The Cowboy In Me

Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers - American Girl

Tori Amos - A Sorta Fairytale

Trace Adkins - Every Light In The House

Train - Meet Virginia

Trillville - Neva Eva 

Trisha Yearwood - I Don't Paint Myself Into Corners

Tyler Hilton - How Love Should Be

Tyler Hilton - Kiss On

Tyler Hilton - Missing You

Tyler Hilton - Up Late Again

U2 - One

U2 - With Or Without You

Unkle Bob - Swans

Vanessa Carlton - Who's To Say

Vertical Horizon - You're A God

We The Kings - Check Yes Juliet

Wheat - I Met A Girl

Yellowcard - Only One

Young Buck - Shorty Wanna Ride

Young Jeezy - Air Forces

Young Jeezy - Bottom Of The Map

Young Jeezy - Get Ya Mind Right

Young Jeezy ft. Bun B - Trap Or Die

Young Jeezy ft. Akon - Soul Survivor

Young Jeezy ft. T.I. & Lil Scrappy - Bang

Yung Joc - I Know You See It

Yung Joc ft. Nitti - It's Goin' Down

[heyyyharry]

Chapter 13: Stay The Night

(from the My Girl Trilogy: Be My Only)

…in which Y/N doesn’t feel safe in her flat, but Harry is too far away.

AU: actor!Harry, older!Harry, younger!Y/N (4-year age gap).

Chapter 12: Ex’s And Oh’s - Their relationship is no longer a secret.

Wattpad link

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When Y/N left her flat this morning, she was filled with stress.

She had taken the bus to clear her mind instead of driving to work, but as she waited at the bus stop, she realized it was a terrible idea. She loved mornings in London. The feeling of being just a tiny nobody in the sea of busy strangers rushing off to work made her feel at ease. After yesterday, however, everything had changed.

A group of schoolgirls also waiting for the bus had been staring at her for two minutes now. As their chatter and snickering rang in her ears, she was sure one of them had taken a photo without her consent and posted it on Instagram with the caption: 'I met the bitch who kissed Harry, and she was ugly as fuck.'

Y/N told herself to ignore them, not giving them the satisfaction of being right about whatever personalities they had picked out for her. Besides, there were only four of them, so maybe she was overreacting. She wasn't the center of the universe and didn't walk down the street with that kissing photo glued to her forehead. But unfortunately, that was exactly how she was feeling right now. She envisioned a spotlight shining on her everywhere she went, and even the homeless guy across the street knew she'd kissed the Harry Styles.

It was the longest bus ride ever, even though she'd chosen to sit at the very back to avoid unwanted attention. Thank God, those teenage girls had got off one stop before her, and she was allowed to walk the rest of the way to the bookstore in peace. Well, it had been peace before she entered the bookstore.

"Good morning, Y/N!" Alice and Eddie said at the same when she walked in. Since when did she get a heartwarming welcome for being thirty minutes late? Was she living in a nightmare? Should she pinch herself to wake up?

"So, I was just telling Eddie that I need a new haircut—" Alice started speaking as Y/N hung up her jacket. "I would like it shorter, and maybe I'll have it dyed to match the color of my dress. My cousin Layla is getting married soon and—"

"It's okay, Al. You can ask me anything," Y/N cut her off, and Alice's eyes grew slightly bigger.

"W-What are you talking about?" the girl stuttered as she exchanged looks with Eddie, who was tongue-tied and could only shake his head.

"I know you've seen those photos and read all the things people have said about me," said Y/N. "And because you're my friends. I want you to be honest. Tell me what you think about me. Ask me questions. Just...don't be so weird. I can't take it."

Shifting from one foot to the other, Alice exhaled as her chest caved in. "I-I'm very sorry it happened to you. And...and for what I said about Harry and Ruby being soulmates or whatever. I did-didn't know it was you."

"I'm sorry too," Eddie blurted as he adjusted his glasses. "I mean...I mean, what Alice just said."

"Nice try, dumbass."

"Hey!"

Y/N snorted as Alice gave Eddie the finger. "So you guys believe me?" she asked.

"Of course we do!" piped Alice. "You and Isaac broke up on good term so you're free to date whoever the fuck you want. Fuck those bitches. Believe me or not, I created another account, just to defend you from hate comments."

For a second, Y/N thought she was only joking, but then quickly realized she was not. "You didn't have to, Alice! I don't even read those comments!"

"Yes, I did have to, because you're my friend." Alice's face contorted as she placed both hands on Y/N's shoulders. "I'm so glad it's you, by the way."

To hear this from Alice of all people made Y/N feel much better. She didn't need validation from every single fan of Harry's to feel worthy of her own relationship, but it was nice to have at least one who supported her.

"It's all thanks to you, Al," she said.

"Thanks to me?!"

"Thanks to her?!"

Y/N couldn't help but laugh at Alice's and Eddie's reaction. She answered them with a firm nod. "If last year you hadn't given me those tickets to see the Heathers musical—"

"Wait a minute! You went to see it with him?!" Alice covered her mouth as her jaw dropped.

"Yeah, well, no, we were...caught in the rain so we didn't get to see it. But before that, we were going to see it together. That was basically how it all started. It's—" She rolled her eyes and exhaled. "It's a long story."

"Tell me!"

"Maybe some other time. I'm sure Eddie doesn't want us to—"

"Tell us!" Eddie chimed in, already resting his chin on his palms like a child waiting for his bedtime story. As they continued to chant "tell us, tell us!", Y/N was left with no choice but to grab a chair and sit down with them.

Taking a deep breath, she began, "Harry and I met when I was nine..."

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Nine-year-old Y/N was thrilled when Gemma agreed to take her to Harry's football game. It was not only the first time she'd got to see him play, but also the first match she had ever attended. She didn't even know the rules. All she knew was, there were two teams, Harry's was red, the opponent was blue. If a player kicked the ball into the other team's net and the goalkeeper from the other team couldn't catch it, then this team got one point. The team with the most points at the end won. It sounded simple when she put it like that, but she knew it was more complicated in reality.

Gemma seemed to know all about football, but the more she explained, the more confused Y/N got. How could anyone remember all these positions? What did a 'penalty' mean? And what the heck were those red and yellow cards the referee was holding?

Frustrated, Gemma eventually gave up and told her, "you'll get it when you're older."

Y/N knew Gemma didn't mean to hurt her feeling, but her words had done just that. 'Older', she despised that word, yet it was all she wanted to become. Older. Smarter. Prettier. If she'd achieved all of those things, she would be good enough to become Harry's girlfriend. Sitting with her head hung, she bit her nails and pondered the idea. It was only when the parents roared with cheers that she snapped back to reality. She looked up just in time Harry was running toward his teammates and screaming with joy, as the goalkeeper on the other team flopped down on the grass, looking defeated. Their reactions made it clear that Harry had just scored.

"Did they win?!" She looked up at Gemma with hopeful eyes, and the older girl gave her a shrug.

"Not yet, but they're already leading 2-0 and there's only five minutes left."

"So they're surely gonna win?!"

When Y/N received a nod as an answer, she jumped and screamed his name so loud it startled Gemma and a few other parents. But she didn't pay attention to them. Every fiber of her being was vibrating with anticipation and her eyes were fixed on her crush. In her imagination, the other boys started to fade into the green of the field, the spectators evaporated like mist in the sun, and Harry was glowing like an angel.

His team won that day, as predicted. Y/N knew she hadn't contributed even the slightest to their victory, but she prided herself on being his good luck charm. And therefore, Harry would be so happy to see her.

While Gemma was chatting with a cute guy she'd run into, Y/N rushed toward the group of older boys who were heading out of the field. Harry spotted her right away, his face gleamed as he waved his hand in the air.

"You were amazing!" she bubbled. "Gemma and I were cheering so loud for you! I knew you'd win!"

"Thanks, Bambi. I'm glad you came," Harry said as he stroked her head, making her feel so happy she almost didn't notice the other boys.

That was only until she heard them snickering, and one said, "I didn't know you had a little sister."

"No, she's my neighbor," Harry answered with a straight face. And the smile Y/N was wearing slowly withered. 'Neighbor'? Was that all she was to him? Not even a friend? Just his 'neighbor'? Ouch.

"You're hanging with little kids now, Harry? Are you a babysitter?" a fat boy said as he cackled and showed his shiny braces.

"How old are you, little baby?" said the skinny one with red hair and squinty eyes. She should've taken his condescending sneer as a sign not to answer his question, but being the only girl there and younger than them all made her feel pressured to tell them what they wanted to hear.

"I'm nine," she said while fidgeting with the hem of her shirt.

All the boys cracked up like she'd just told a funny joke. But the only joke here was...her. They were all laughing at her.

"Hey, that's enough, Jake!"

When Harry glowered at them, their laughter slowly died down. But neither that thin boy nor those who'd laughed at her showed any remorse for picking on a little girl. Y/N hopelessly studied Harry's reaction, a line appeared between her brows as she clutched her hands tightly together. She was waiting for him to ask them to apologize, or at least tell them that she was more mature and probably smarter than all of them combined.

But Harry said nothing about it. He told her to get back to Gemma before she got lost and then walked off with the rest of the team.

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That photo. That goddamn photo.

Harry knew it should've been the least of his concern now that there were at least five different shots of him kissing his girlfriend floating around on the Internet. Still, he was sitting here and getting fed up with the photo of her and Isaac at the wedding reception.

They looked happy. Way too happy. If the way they laughed hadn't already driven him up the wall, seeing Isaac's arm tightened around his girlfriend's waist had done the perfect job. It was all he'd been thinking about since last night.

Given a short break between the two scenes, Harry returned to his chair and pulled out his phone to send Y/N a text, but he sat and contemplated at the screen for a long moment. He felt petty when his brain told him to ask her about the photo with Isaac. But his heart, which knew better, told him to avoid talking about any photo. She had dealt with enough of shit on her own, and the last thing she needed was her pathetic boyfriend getting jealous like a hormonal teenage boy.

After what seemed like an eternity, he finally typed down a line and pressed send.

⌲ Morning, love! How's your day been? :)

It didn't take too long for her to reply, so he guessed she was on her phone while 'working' again.

⌲ Bambi: So far so good. How's yours?

⌲ Everything's great, except for the fact that you're not here, which sucks.

⌲ Bambi: You're a good liar.

⌲ I'm not! I really miss you! :(

⌲ Bambi: No, silly. I mean...

⌲ Bambi: Niall told me you asked for his thought about the photo of me and Isaac.

⌲ Damn it, Niall.

⌲ Look, baby, it's no big deal.

⌲ Bambi: Yeah? Then tell me what you think about the photo. Answer honestly.

⌲ I think you looked great in that dress.

⌲ Bambi: Harry...

⌲ Okay. Fine. I don't like the way he had his arm around you. And you two looked like a happy couple...

⌲ Bambi: We're not though. I'm with you.

⌲ I know...I'm not doubting you or anything.

⌲ Bambi: You sound like you are...

⌲ I'm not. I swear!

He impatiently drummed his fingers on the arm of the chair, and let out a harsh breath when her reply finally popped up.

⌲ Bambi: They were playing a really good song so I got lost in the moment and kept stepping on his feet. That photo was the exact moment when I was about to fall and he caught me just in time. We were just laughing at how stupid I was.

⌲ Oh...

⌲ Bambi: Feel better now?

⌲ Yeah :)

Three dots appeared as she was typing, but they were interrupted by a call from Jeff. Harry had been expecting the call since last night, but his manager had been too busy to respond.

"Hey, man, how's it?" Harry implored as he leaned back in his chair.

"We can't figure out who leaked the photo," Jeff said, his voice was heavily low. "You need to ask her, Harry."

The actor tossed his head back and drew in a long breath. He didn't even want to face Ruby after what had happened the other night, so asking her if she'd leaked the photos of him and his girlfriend would be much worse. But it seemed like he had no other choice.

"Fine, she'll be here any second. I'll try to speak to her."

"Great!" Jeff marveled, but Harry didn't see what was so great about that. He was still full of tension as he tapped his foot and buried his hand in his hair.

"What about the other thing?"

"What other thing?"

"Have you read my text from last night?"

"Oh, that." Jeff huffed. "You can't do that, mate."

"What? Why?"

"You'll draw even more attention to yourself and your girlfriend if you speak up about the issue."

"But people want to hear the truth. They'll stop talking if I just make a post to explain everything—"

"Harry, stop!" Jeff cut him off. "These people won't ever stop unless they forget. You know you can't please the angry mob no matter what you feed them. They're not here for answers, they're here for drama. So they will just turn every word you say against you."

"This is not about me though, this is about Bambi!"

"Bambi? That's her name?"

"N-No, her name's Y/N." Harry squeezed his eyes shut, rubbing his forehead. "I want to protect her. She's not...she's not like the others. She's not used to this."

"Then you need to let this go. Don't give people more reasons to hate Y/N."

Harry nodded as he unclenched his fists. "You're probably right...thanks, man."

"Hey, your mess is also my mess." Jeff cackled and told Harry that he needed to go, but if Harry needed anything, he could always ring him up. "Good luck with your Bambi," he said before ending the call, and Harry only gave a chuckle as a response.

The last text he'd received from Y/N was: 'I gotta go. Talk to you later.' So he guessed their conversation was also over. He quickly typed down 'I love you', sent it, and put his phone away.

"Is Ruby here yet?" he heard the director ask everyone as she made her way toward him. "Harry, have you talked to Ruby?"

"No, I—"

"Hold on!" Evangeline held up a finger in front of his face as she checked her phone. "Her assistant just sent me a text. She'll be here late due to traffic. Well, why aren't I surprised?"

Laughing, she sat down in Ruby's chair next to him and snapped her fingers to get his attention. "Hey, you alright?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. He almost blurted out his usual answer to every situation, but nothing seemed to get past the eyes of this woman. "I know no criticism could bring you down, but you're worried about your girlfriend, right?"

"Yeah," he admitted, not knowing why, but he went on anyway. "She's not famous. She doesn't even like the idea of being famous, so this is a lot for her to handle. I just...I wish I was home with her right now. To make her feel safe."

It was the first time he'd openly talked about Y/N to a co-worker, and it felt really nice to be able to get certain feelings off his chest. Besides, he trusted Evangeline. This lady had never worn fewer than three colors in one outfit, and her hats were always much bigger than her head. Right now she was wearing a massive yellow summer hat with extravagant ruffles feathers on the wide brim. No negative comment about it could force her to take it off. She simply didn't care about being judged and had never judged anyone.

"I kept wanting to ask you if you got a girlfriend at home, but now I know," she said and patted him on the shoulder.

"Really?" He snorted, his eyebrows pulled together. "I mean, most people would've assumed I was with Ruby."

"You and Ruby?!" the director gasped as if he'd just said something outrageous. "Hein? You and Ruby don't look happy together. You're just good at pretending like you are in love. I thought you had great chemistry on-screen, but off-screen? Not so much."

"Well, that's a relief." He rolled his eyes and exhaled a laugh. "I'm just so tired of people thinking we're 'a match made in heaven' just because we look good together on-screen."

"What's her name?"

"Huh?"

"Your girl. What's her name?"

"Y/N." Harry smiled as he scratched his nose. He could never say her name without a smile on his face.

"That's a pretty name," said Eva.

"I call her Bambi instead." He shook his head at the memories and laughed a little. "She has...these...very pretty eyes. The prettiest I've ever seen. But they were so sad, and—" The man stopped talking when he saw the way Eva was gawking at him. Immediately, he exclaimed, "oh God, I'm sorry for oversharing. Let's just...just forget what I said."

"Quoi! Please continue! I love hearing stories about love!" she said and clutched her chest. "I'm a hopeless romantic and I think the story of how you met Y/N was beautiful!"

"Thank you." He hung his head, picking at his own nails as his voice lowered to slightly above a whisper. "I care about her a lot. And sometimes, I just feel like...she could be happier without me."

"Doesn't she love you?"

"She does, of course...Very much I'm afraid." He twisted one of the rings on his fingers, eyes on his feet instead of Eva. "She could just have a normal relationship without having to hide, or going online and read the terrible things people say about her that aren't true. I'm trying to protect her, but it's scary to think that...that she should be protected from...me."

Eva was deep in thoughts as she cocked her head and fiddled with her hoop earring. Harry assumed she agreed with him but then she uttered, "you know, you do think a lot like your character Jay."

"How so?" he asked.

"Well, you're in love but your insecurities tell you you're not good enough, and therefore you don't deserve to be in love. That is not fair for sweet Y/N." Eva wrapped one of her curls around her finger and gave a half shrug. "The only thing which is worse than loving someone who doesn't love you back, is loving someone who's afraid to love you."

"I'm not afraid," he said, almost defensively, and she pressed her lips into a gentle smile.

"I know you aren't. But when things get...complicated, and you feel like you should let go, just remember what I've told you today. If you let go, thinking it's what's best for Y/N, you're not doing it for her, you're doing it for yourself, and it's very selfish."

Harry stayed quiet, needing time to let the advice sink in. But before he could open his mouth, Ruby burst into the room and frantically apologized for being late...again.

Eva stood up fast and clapped her hands to get everyone's attention. "Next scene in five minutes!"

Ruby was quick to spot Harry from across the room. Instead of looking away when their eyes met, she shot him a smile. This could be a good sign, he thought and rose from his chair. They held that eye contact as he walked over to where she stood, and she didn't wander off to avoid a confrontation. She took a deep breath, squared her shoulders and crossed her arms. She was finally ready to talk.

"Hey," he said with both hands in his pockets. "How are you?"

"Better than ever. Thanks for asking," she said. Her face showed the opposite of distress, and this time he couldn't tell whether her cheerfulness was fake or real.

"I actually want to ask you about—"

"I know you think I took and leaked those photos, but I didn't," Ruby told him with her head held high. "It was the Declan twins."

"So you knew it all along?"

"Yes," she admitted without pause, keeping her expression neutral. "They did it because they were both bitter that Isaac had turned them down. They were obsessed with him. The only thing I'm guilty of is not doing anything to stop them, because I also wanted to get back at you and the girl."

"Right..." Harry breathed, pinching the bridge of his nose and putting a hand on his hip. He wasn't sure what to do with this piece of information. He couldn't call up the twins and demand them to take down the photos, which had already been shared all over the internet. He couldn't sue them either, it would only make everything worse. He couldn't stop being friends with them, because, well, he had never been friends with them, to begin with, and they obviously didn't care about him. So there was absolutely nothing he could do but accept that fact and move on. Nevertheless, he was glad to have found out the truth.

"Anyway, um, thanks for telling me."

"Wait," Ruby stopped him, making him turn around and blink at her in confusion as she stood there with her lips slightly parted. It took her a second to finally say, "how is she?"

"What?"

"How's Y/N?" She cleared her throat and shifted from one foot to the other while plucking at the cuff of her shirt. "Um...I've read the things people said. Know how it feels to deal with shit like this so..."

To say he was shocked would be an understatement, because this wasn't the Ruby who'd shown up at his hotel room two nights ago. In fact, he couldn't remember the last time he'd seen her like this. He supposed it was a good thing, yet he would need some time to get used to it.

"Yeah, well, I'm taking care of her," he said, giving her a smile.

"You're always taking care of people." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and shook her head a bit. "But...at least now it's someone who deserves it, right?"

Harry stilled, not knowing what to say. If Eva hadn't intervened right then, he might've just blurted out something stupid to get rid of the awkward tension.

"Harry, Ruby!" Her thick French accent turned their heads at the same time. The lady snapped her fingers at them. "I need you both! Hurry!"

Breaking into a grin, Ruby hastened to her position. Harry felt a surge of happiness as he watched her start a conversation with Eva. What he saw was the charismatic woman who had enchanted him when they first met. The old Ruby was back, and she was finally healing, this time, all on her own.

.

.

.

Whenever Y/N felt dejected, she would seek for therapy in writing. She would write to kill time and to be distracted, and at the moment, she needed her imagination more than she needed air. She had eaten dinner alone and sat in front of her laptop since 6 PM. Hours had passed and she had written almost three thousand words in total. She was too tired to continue, but not tired enough to fall asleep. So if she stopped now she would lie in bed wide awake and think about all sorts of negative things.

She knew she shouldn't have done what she'd done earlier that day. She had sworn to herself and Harry that she wouldn't go online and scroll through the comments about the photos, but she had. And it was too late to regret it now. She had thought she could sympathize with what Ruby had dealt with. But now that she was in her shoes, she realized she could never sympathize with what someone was going through, until she had to go through it herself.

She'd been teased in school when she was about six or seven. Back then she hadn't got the guts to stand up for herself, so her greatest escape would be going home and holing up in her room, where there was no more invasion of destructive words. Now with social media, the bullying started all over again as you went home and logged on. People were free to share pictures and videos, and one tiny mistake could ruin your life. That was the reason she'd tried to keep her life online and offline as private as possible. She knew what would happen when people knew too much about her. But everything was different now. Those people had got inside her head.

She wanted to tell Harry as he was the only one who could make her feel safe. But she didn't want to make this a bigger problem for him. If he'd known how she was feeling, he would've dropped everything and flown home to make sure she was okay. Hadn't she messed up his life enough already? Besides, he had a movie premiere to attend tonight. He'd been so excited when receiving the invitation, because some directors and actors he looked up to would be there. The least she could do for him as a girlfriend was to allow him to have fun without worrying about her every single minute.

It was 1 AM, and the sound of doorbell woke Y/N from her sleep. She lifted her face from her arms and realized she'd been asleep on her desk for God knew how long. Tired, she checked the clock again to make sure she hadn't mistaken. It was exactly 1 AM. And the unexpected guest rang her doorbell a couple of times more to make it very clear that they wanted to get in. All the people who could pay her a visit at this time of the day would never do that.

She got up, feeling a bit woozy as she walked to the living room and picked up her keys from the coffee table. There were footsteps rushing down the stairs as she headed toward the door. Did that person just...run away?

Y/N's heart was pounding so hard she almost couldn't breathe. She unlocked the door and pulled it open immediately, panting with wide eyes when she saw nothing but an empty hallway...and a box left on the doormat.

She looked to her left, and then to her right, and once she was sure she was alone, she picked up the box and shook it twice. The object seemed to be much smaller than the space within the box, but she couldn't figure out what it was. It couldn't have been a bomb, because who would've bombed her, anyway? So it couldn't be that bad.

And she was right, it wasn't that bad. Because it was worse. It made her wish it'd been a bomb.

The box dropped to her feet as she shrieked and jumped back, gripping the edge of the door so she wouldn't fall. Covering her mouth with one hand, she gulped down breaths to stay quiet.

It was a rat. A dead rat.

The head was flattened. Fresh blood soaked into the fur it touched, matting it together. She noticed an eyeball had been squeezed out and turned away, pale in the face and feeling like she might throw up. She hadn't touched it, but her fingers were already numb. It took her a few seconds to look at it again. Her chest rose and fell with rapid breaths as she read the letters written on the bottom of the box.

GOLD DIGGING SLUT!

Y/N slammed the door, locked it as fast as she could and covered her mouth to muffle her crying. Fighting the weakness in her knees, she dashed straight into her bedroom to get her phone and call the police.

.

.

.

"Don't open the door! No!"

Y/N shrank back into her blanket as the girl in the movie was stabbed to death by the creep in the mask. After only a second of resisting and screaming for help, knowing no one would be able to hear her, her body dropped to the ground, and she laid there like a butchered animal in a waste of blood.

Y/N's heartbeat was racing, nearly exploding as she held her breath and turned to aunt Lynn, who had dozed off a while ago. The babysitter's head was tilted back, her mouth was open, and her eyes were closed. Y/N had never thought sleeping aunt Lynn would be scarier than the usual aunt Lynn, but right now it appeared so.

When the doorbell rang, Y/N jumped to her feet, clutching her chest as she took a few steps backward until her thighs hit the edge of the coffee table.

"Who's there?!" she raised her voice.

Her aunt was still sleeping soundly on the couch. If the person outside were to kill both of them, aunt Lynn would probably die in peace, and Y/N would die screaming like the girl in the movie.

"Who is it?!" the little girl asked again when the doorbell rang for the second time. She gathered all the courage she had left and marched toward the door. "I-I have a...a knife here! I'm not afraid to use it!"

"You have a knife?!"

"Harry?!" Y/N blew out her cheeks as her shoulders sagged. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to see you," he said. "Just let me in."

She was about to unlock the door but then she cowered back, her hands squeezed into fists against her chest. "How do I know you're really Harry?" she asked, and the boy responded with a soft chuckle.

"Who else would I be, kid?"

"Maybe you're just really good at faking his voice."

"Are you watching horror movies with aunt Lynn again?"

"How do you know that?! Who are you?" she gasped and stepped away from the door, but she could hear Harry let out a sharp breath.

"Don't be silly, Bambi. Aunt Lynn always makes you watch those stupid movies—" he paused suddenly. "She's not there, is she?"

"She's sleeping," Y/N mumbled, now feeling less on edge because this boy sounded a lot like Harry. Still, she needed solid proof in order to trust him. "If you're Harry, then...then tell me something only Harry knows."

"Bambi, come on."

"I'm serious!"

"Okay, okay!" He laughed and his shadow underneath her door moved around a bit. "So uh...you hate green peas but your mother loves them, so you keep it as a secret to not hurt her feelings."

"I love green peas."

"No, you don't!"

"I just changed my mind yesterday."

"Then how could I know if you're only telling me now?"

"Fine, you're right," Y/N breathed as she finally relaxed and unlocked the door.

Harry greeted her with a big smile. He was wearing flip-flops and pyjamas so she guessed he had been ready for bed before he came over. She hadn't checked the time, but she was sure it was almost midnight now. So why was he here?

"Couldn't sleep. Want to talk to you," he answered the question she hadn't asked and stepped into her living room, smirking as he saw her aunt drooling. "Man, she looks even scarier sleeping."

"Right?" Y/N snorted, closing the door and telling him to follow her to her room before they woke up her babysitter.

There they sat on the edge of her bed, side by side. Neither knew how to begin even though they both had a lot to say to each other. And as usual, Harry had to start the conversation. Y/N would never swallow her pride to forgive him before he apologized.

"I'm sorry about the other day," he said while tapping his foot and staring at the floor. "I...uh...I know you're mad at me—"

"Yes, I am," she cut him short, arms crossed over her chest. "I'm also disappointed. But my mum said if a person didn't want to be your friend, then you shouldn't try to change their mind."

"I do want to be friends with you, kid."

"You have friends." She turned her face away and gave a mirthless laugh. "Awful ones. But who am I to judge?"

Harry was quiet for a moment. She wasn't looking at him to see his reaction but she could feel his eyes on her.

"I love hearing you say things. Even when you're upset with me," he said, a smile could be heard in the tone of his voice.

Unexpectedly, he reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, and she jerked away, making him set his palms down flat on the bed.

"You're the smartest girl I know, Bambi," he said with a timid smile. "Sometimes you're even smarter than me and those boys."

"Sometimes? You mean, all the time."

Her remark made him cackle. "Yeah. All the time." He nodded. "I guess...I was just...trying to make myself seem cool, but it actually made me look like a jerk. So...I'm very sorry. You know I would choose you over anyone else."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Even when the whole world tells you to stop being friends with me."

"Yup." He took her hand and hooked their pinkies together. "You have my word."

"Well then, apology accepted." Beaming, she rose from the bed and pulled him up by the arms. "Now you should go before my aunt gets here."

"Right! My mum would be so mad if she found out I was gone!"

A thunderous boom made the kids jump and scream as they clung to each other. In a blink of an eye, the rain came pouring down like a giant waterfall. With both arms wrapped around Harry's waist, Y/N hid her face into his chest when a flash of lightning blinded her. She knew it was silly but she couldn't help it. She was stuck in adrenaline mode.

Harry stared out of the window, watching the violent wind bending the trees, and he grumbled, "crap, how am I supposed to go home?"

"Then don't!" Y/N blurted, making the boy chortle.

"Are you scared?"

"I'm not! It's just—"

"Just what?" He cracked a smirk, held onto her shoulders and bent his knees to look into her eyes. "What did I tell you about watching those horror movies?"

"If you're only teasing me, then maybe you should go home." She shrugged his arms off and gave a dismissive wave of her hand, but the boy stayed right where he was instead of leaving. Sitting back on her bed, she crossed her arms and lifted an eyebrow at him. "Well?"

"I think I'm gonna stay," Harry said with a shrug. Without waiting for a response, he jumped back on the bed and lied down with his arms folded under his head.

"What about your mum? Wouldn't she be angry?" Y/N questioned as she held back a smile.

"She'd be angrier if I came home all soaked. Might as well just stay here and face the consequences in the morning."

Nodding once, the girl climbed on the bed to lie down on her back, her hands resting on her belly. She closed her eyes so the lightning couldn't bother her anymore, but then she felt Harry inching closer.

"I will protect you," he said.

Y/N turned to lie on her side as she opened her eyes slowly. She found herself mirroring him. His luminous green eyes were so different in moments like these, softer than she knew eyes could be. And she almost drifted off when she remembered what he'd just said.

Yawning, she told him, "the murderer would just kill you first."

"If there was a murderer, then we'd both be dead."

"I feel much safer now. You're doing a good job."

Harry snorted at her sarcasm while toying with a lock of her hair on her pillow. She didn't think he was aware of him doing that, but she didn't say a word, not wanting him to stop.

"I'll protect you from everything else," he went on. "Storms. Bullies. Spiders...Wait, you're the weirdo who loves spiders."

"They're cute. My teacher has one as a pet."

"Your teacher's a weirdo."

"That's...kinda true," she said, making both of them laugh.

"But seriously—" He stopped twirling her hair as his eyebrow snapped together. "I will protect you."

"I know you will." She giggled, clutching his hand and holding it tight.

When another bolt of lightning struck and rumbles of thunder shook the earth, she didn't even notice. Nothing could scare her now that he was here.

.

.

.

"You didn't have to come over, you know?" Y/N said as she locked the door, but Isaac didn't speak. He cautiously looked around her living room to make sure everything was normal. His hair was soaked from the rain and so was his jacket, which he shrugged off and hung on the coat stand by the kitchen door.

She knew no one else to call. Harry was in Paris, her father was in Holmes Chapel, her best friends had gone on their honeymoon. It was only at times like this that she began to see the importance of having more than a few people you could trust. She had never hated loneliness until tonight.

She'd called Isaac only to have someone to talk to. But what she hadn't expected was him driving all the way here in the pouring rain just to make sure she was okay.

"Have the police arrived?" he asked when she came out of her bedroom and brought him a towel to dry his hair.

"You came shortly after they'd left," she said. "They took care of the box, but there was no way to figure out who put it there."

"Have they checked the camera in the hallway?"

"There's no camera in the hallway. The lift here doesn't even work." Y/N covered her eyes with one hand and laughed out loud. She didn't know what was so funny about receiving a dead rat as a gift while living in the most unsecured building in London. But finding humor in a situation like this made her feel less anxious.

For the next fifteen minutes, they were just sitting on the couch and checking their phones in silence. Y/N didn't have anything to check on her phone, but she didn't know what to say to Isaac either. So she ended up looking through the old pics and reading old messages from Harry. She was too scared to even turn off the airplane mode, let alone go online and get bombarded by more hate words. At least those words didn't smell like dead rats.

"Ugh..." she grunted and held her nose. Just the thought of that nasty smell could almost make her vomit.

"You okay, Smiley?"

"I'm fine," she lied, nodding fast. And then the words just slipped out before she could stop them. "Do you think you can stay longer? I know you have to go to work tomorr—"

"I'll stay until sunrise, yeah?" he said without a second thought. "You can just go to bed. I'll still be here when you wake up."

"No, I'll...I'll stay up with you."

"You seem tired, Smiley."

"I'm not..."

She was though. She'd been struggling to keep her bloodshot eyes open ever since they sat down. But Isaac knew better than to argue with her.

"How about I get you a blanket and a pillow so you can lie down here?" he suggested.

She thought for a moment before giving him a nod. Her eyes followed him as he got up and walked to her bedroom. He came back not so long later with a blanket and a pillow, and took a seat in the armchair so she could take the couch. Y/N lied down on her side, facing him with her hands under her cheek. There was a window behind Isaac, and from where she laid, she could see lightning jag across the night sky, ripping it like paper. Quickly, she covered her ear before the loud thunder cracked the air, making Isaac jolt upright.

He chuckled when he saw her grin. "Are you making fun of me?"

"I am, yeah." She nodded, making him screw up his face.

"That's not how you treat your hero."

"Aww, I'm sorry, my hero," she said, pouting at him.

Isaac shook with laughter as he leaned back in his chair. Although he didn't want to show it, he was exhausted. She could see it in the way he stretched and kept rubbing his eyes with the heel of his palm.

"I hope after tonight you won't regret being my friend," she murmured, watching his eyes widen.

"No, I love being your friend," he said. But she didn't know how much of that sentence was the truth. She didn't speak, so he went on, "are you going to tell Harry about tonight?"

"I don't know." She stuck out her bottom lip, shaking her head. "He'll freak out for sure."

"Yeah, but you should tell him. Maybe wait until tomorrow."

"Yeah..." She gripped the blanket and shivered when there was another thunder. "I hope whoever sent me the rat got swept away by this rain."

Her random remark got Isaac laughing. "I hope so too," he said. "They deserve it."

"Promise you won't tell Harry?"

"That I was here?"

"No." She shook her head slightly, feeling a lump in her throat as she spotted the frown on his face. "Just don't tell him about tonight. I'll do it myself."

"Okay." He forced a smile. "I promise."

Neither of them said another word, and Y/N couldn't feel her muscles anymore. Her eyelids fluttered as her eyes became heavier and heavier, finally sending her into a dreamless sleep.

.

.

.

When Y/N woke up, Isaac wasn't sitting in his chair anymore. The window curtains were closed for he didn't want her to get blinded by the light. She pushed herself up from the couch, resting her arm on the backrest and looking around to find him. He wasn't there, but his jacket was still on the coat stand, so she assumed he was in the bathroom. She held onto her head, and the memories of what had happened seemed like a terrible nightmare. But she knew it'd been real because she could still smell the rat.

The ringtone caught her by surprise. She muttered a curse word and reached for her phone on the coffee table. It was Harry. Great! She had just woken up, and now she had to improvise a speech to explain the previous situation without freaking him out. She meant to sit and watch her phone ring, but her conscience didn't let her do it. So she let go of a harsh sigh and picked up the phone.

"Good morning, my favorite girl in the world!" he said with a sing-song voice, and she silently cursed him for it. She didn't want him to be so cheerful before she told him a real-life horror story.

"Hey, baby. I just woke up."

"What's wrong? You sound tired."

Fuck, he noticed.

"No, I...well..."

"Smiley, can I borrow a towel?"

Shit!

"Is that—"

"Smiley!"

"Yes!" Y/N almost screamed at Isaac, who was standing at her bedroom door. He quickly caught on to what was happening when he saw her on the phone, so he mouthed an apology and hurriedly went back inside.

"Is that Isaac?!" Harry sounded out of breath. "Why is he there at seven in the morning?"

"Harry—"

"Did he spend the night there? Bambi, please tell me—"

"Fuck, someone was outside my flat at 1 AM!"

The other side went silent. For a second, Y/N thought Harry was gone.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, but with a much softer tone this time.

Taking a deep breath, she kneaded her shoulder and shut her eyes and she said, "someone rang my doorbell at one in the morning. I came to answer it, but no one was there. There was a...a box."

"A box?"

"Yeah, a box...And...and there was—" A dead rat in it. "There was a note in it that said 'gold-digging slut'."

"Fuck," he cursed heavily. If this was his reaction to only the message, she didn't want to find out how he would've reacted had she told him about the rat.

"I called the police and they couldn't do anything about it, so I had to call Isaac. I didn't know anyone else, I—"

"It's okay, baby. I get it, I get it," he breathed. "I don't want you to stay there tonight, alright? I'll phone my assistant. You already have the key to my house so—"

"Harry, I cannot stay at your house."

"—I'll send a bodyguard. You'll be much safer there. I'll call my assistant right now," he said quickly, not listening to whatever she wanted to say.

"Harry!" she raised her voice, at the same time, laughing to lighten up the mood. But both of them knew she was awfully stressed out. "I can't...I can't stay at your house."

"Bambi, don't do this, okay?" Harry hissed, sounding so frustrated that it made her guilty she had brought this upon him. "You're staying at my house until I get back. Just a few days more, baby. Please."

She swallowed and massaged the back of her neck. She didn't want to bother him, but if she'd said no, he would've done something as crazy as gone home to her. She couldn't let that happen.

"Fine, I'll get my stuff," she said at last, blowing out her cheeks.

"Good girl." Her boyfriend sighed in relief. "I'll keep you safe, yeah? Even when I'm not there, I'll...I'll make sure that you're safe. Just a few days more and I'll be home with you and everything will be okay."

"Okay," she mumbled, faking a smile even though he couldn't see her.

When she was a little girl, she would feel safe every time he promised to protect her. But now she feared it wasn't true anymore. There were things that were not in his power. There were things that he couldn't prevent. She could only hope nothing worse would happen in the next few days before he returned. She needed him badly, now more than ever. If only she could tell him that...

[cocastyle]

Thankful

Pairing- Jake Peralta x reader

Word Count- 4,870

Warning- none

A/N- here’s my first attempt at a Brooklyn 99 one shot! I’ve recently become obsessed with the show and was in the middle of watching season one when I saw the Thanksgiving episode and had this idea. I plan on writing more Brooklyn 99 one shots as I go seeing as each episode makes me fall more and more in love with the show than I already was before. I hope you all like this!

When asked which holiday was someone’s favorite, most people responded with Christmas or Halloween. But for Y/N L/N that holiday was Thanksgiving.

It was the holiday where she could celebrate being thankful for everything good in her life, where she could stuff her face until she fell into a food coma, and the holiday in which she could spend time with the people she loved and cared about, the people she was thankful for.

So Y/N was always excited when it came to Thanksgiving, but this year was different for this was the first year she would be spending the special holiday with her friends of the 99th prescinct in Brooklyn and Y/N was determined to make it perfect especially for Jake Peralta.

Y/N had been working at the precinct for a little under a year and had even been dating Jake for a few months now, so she had heard a lot about how the man hated Thanksgiving and wanted nothing to do with it. He wouldn’t tell her what the reason was, but then again, he wouldn’t give her the chance to even ask, always pushing aside the topic before it had even begun.

But Y/N, being the Thanksgiving loving person that she was, wanted nothing more than to show her boyfriend just how great the holiday was, even if that meant just getting to spend an evening with the man she had grown to love.

Luckily for her, her best friend Amy Santiago wanted to host a small Thanksgiving dinner for the squad, so Y/N had been quick to volunteer to help the girl make all the necessary preparations. Now it was just a matter of getting Jake to come.

Knowing that the man would decline if he knew too far in advance, Y/N waited until Jake entered the precinct on Thanksgiving Day after just getting back from a case to ask him.

“Check it out, chair jockeys!” Jake exclaimed as he walked into the room with a bag of cocaine in hand. “While you were busy tickling the ivories on your computers, I was doing a bust. Cocaine!” Y/N chuckled softly at the voice he made before Jake handed the cocaine over to an officer. “Thanks, Lucius,” he said.

Jake’s eyes then flickered around the office as he looked for someone, finally stopping once he caught sight of Y/N. Jake grinned and walked over to the girl before giving her a quick kiss in greeting and wrapping his arm around her waist.

“He ran, I pursued. Whole thing turned into an awesome car chase,” Jake said, obviously trying to impress his girlfriend. Y/N knew better than to think that was the actual story, but she just entertained the boy by looking impressed.

“Well, at least you’re done early, so you have time to go home and change for Y/N and I’s Thanksgiving dinner,” Amy said.

Jake furrowed his eyebrows and opened his mouth to object to coming, but Y/N was quick to stop him with a kiss. She pulled away and the boy instantly smiled at her with a dreamy expression on his face.

“Please come,” Y/N whispered as she gave him her best puppy-dog eyes. “Please. For me?”

Jake frowned slightly, his eyes flickering over the girl’s face. “I know what you’re trying to do and let me just say that is manipulative,” he said as he pointed a finger at her.

“Please? All you have to do is dress up,” Y/N said as she walked over to her desk and sat down. “Ugh. Why do we have to dress up for Thanksgiving?” Jake asked. “I don’t even celebrate that stuff. The whole holiday is based on overeating. We should be wearing velvet track suits and diapers.”

“Jacket and tie,” Amy insisted. “Rosa’s even wearing her formal leather jacket.” The three looked over to said woman who nodded, “It’s the one without any blood on it.”

“You’re gonna dress up, and you’re gonna give a toast about what you’re thankful for. Start preparing,” Amy told him. “Oh, I prefer not to prepare for my roasts. I just wing ‘em like scat jazz,” Jake said before beginning to imitate jazz. Y/N shook her head, a small smile on her face as she stared at the man who had stolen her heart.

Amy gave the girl a look and Y/N was quick to look away, knowing that Amy (and everyone else in the precinct) just wanted her to tell Jake that she loved him already, the one thing the two hadn’t done since they started dating.

“Are we singing?” Scully asked, breaking Amy’s gaze away from Y/N which the girl was silently thankful for. “No, no, no, no,” Jake said in a rushed voice, but Scully didn’t seem to notice and began to sing some opera.

Realizing there was no stopping the man, Jake looked to Amy and Y/N. “I’m not dressing up for your party,” he whispered.

“But you’ll come?” Y/N asked in a hopeful voice. Jake’s eyes flickered over to the girl before he hesitantly nodded his head. “Fine, I’ll come,” he said. “But I’m not dressing up!”

And with that, the man was rushing off leaving Y/N to do a little happy dance. Part one of her plan was complete.

Jake Peralta was officially coming to the Thanksgiving dinner.

- - -

By the time the Thanksgiving dinner had arrived, Y/N was practically bouncing up and down in excitement. She had arrived early to help Amy set up everything seeing as Amy had been kind enough to make all the food and Y/N had been waiting and watching as their friends began to trickle in.

It was only when she got a text from Jake saying that he was there that Y/N sprinted over to the door and opened it up, coming face to face with her boyfriend.

“Wow,” Jake whispered breathlessly as he stared at the girl in front of him who stood in a black sweater dress that fit her just right and black boots to match. Y/N blushed and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear while Jake looked her up and down. “You look gorgeous, L/N.”

Y/N smiled softly, but it faltered slightly as she took in the man’s appearance. He was really set on not dressing up. Instead of a nice shirt and tie like Y/N and Amy had told him, Jake had gone out of the way to do the exact opposite, wearing one of his usual plaid shirts with a blue jacket over it. Even the tie he wore to work had been purposefully taken off much to Y/N’s dismay.

“Thanks. You look. . .um. . .comfy?” Y/N muttered. Jake smiled, not noticing the small amount of hurt in her eyes. “Thanks, that’s what I was going for. I was being serious when I said I wasn’t going to dress up,” Jake reminded her.

“I can see that. Uh. . .come on in,” Y/N told him. Jake nodded and entered the small apartment before asking, “You sure this is Amy’s place? It looks like my grandma lives here.”

Y/N gently whacked the man who smirked and looked to her. His smirk fell slightly when she noticed how she looked out of it and he frowned before putting a hand on her arm. “Hey, what’s wrong?” Jake asked.

“Oh, my God, Amy, that’s so cool that you still live with your grandmother,” Gina said, interrupting the conversation the two had been having and saving Y/N from Jake’s question. “I live alone. This is my stuff. I like quilts,” Amy told her with a shrug.

“Stop. Each sentence is getting sadder,” Gina said. “It looks like you live on the set of Murder, She Wrote,” Rosa commented.

“Well, I gotta say, it’s not as bad as I thought it would be. I mean, the football game’s not on, so I can still watch it later at home. And it’s kind of cool to visit a time before electricity was invented,” Jake teased.

Amy frowned and reached for a stack of papers with a sigh, “I have to practice my toast.” “Woah, Amy. How long is that?” Y/N asked, her eyes wide. “Eight pages,” Amy responded.

“Single-spaced?” Jake questioned. “Double-sided,” Amy added. “Santiago style,” Y/N and Jake muttered making Amy crack a small smile while the couple chuckled.

Jake wrapped an arm around Y/N waist and was about to question her about earlier when Terry interrupted. “Mm-hmm. Hey, excuse me. Can we please eat? My body is starting to digest itself. Terry needs nutrients,” he said.

“No eating until the Captain gets here,” Amy told him. “Okay? Sorry.” “Don’t apologize. I’d rather spend Thanksgiving at your house than with my sister,” Rosa muttered. “It’s so pleasant and boring. But, Holt, at your house, surrounded by these idiots? Guaranteed train wreck. Thanks for the invite, Amy and Y/N.”

The doorbell rang, breaking the conversation and making Amy tense up. “He’s here! Okay, he’s here, everybody. Be cool. Hitchcock, why do you have your shirt off?” Amy asked and the whole room looked to the man who was sitting shirtless beside Scully.

“Can’t spill food on your shirt if you’re not wearing one,” Hitchcock replied. Amy shook her head slightly and rushed over to the door.

Sensing that Jake wanted to talk, Y/N looked to her boyfriend and said, “I’m gonna go help Amy and make sure she doesn’t ramble too much.” Jake didn’t even get a chance to say anything back before Y/N was rushing after Amy.

The two friends opened the door to see Captain Holt standing there. “Captain Holt,” Amy greeted. “Happy Thanksgiving, Sir,” Y/N said with a smile. “Happy Thanksgiving. Your apartment was very easy to locate,” Holt told Amy.

“Thank you so much. You look beautiful,” Amy said. Y/N facepalmed and looked to Amy who frowned at her word choice. “Weirdest conversation ever,” Jake called out. “Nice work, you three.”

Y/N sent her boyfriend a small glare while he just winked at her. The girl sighed and clapped her hands together. “How about we eat?” Y/N suggested. “Yes, please!” Terry practically yelled.

The group all chuckled and made their way over to their seats. Y/N was still a little upset and hurt by Jake, but it all washed away when he pulled her seat out for her and made sure she was all situated before sitting beside her, taking her hand in his almost immediately.

Y/N smiled lovingly at the boy and kissed his cheek before Amy cleared her throat to gain everyone’s attention. “Before we eat, I’d like everyone to go around and say what they’re thankful for this year,” Amy said.

“I’ll go,” Y/N announced before she stood up, grabbing ahold of her drink. “First of all, I just wanted to thank you all for coming. It really means a lot to me and Amy that you all came. I guess I’ll start by saying that I’m thankful for each of you. The move from my last precinct was pretty hard for me, but with all of your help, you all made it a whole lot easier. I never expected to create so many friendships or to find someone who I am lucky enough to call my boyfriend, let alone find a group of people who would become like a family to me. So I guess I just want you all to know that I’m thankful for everything you all have done and for the family you all have given me. To you all.”

Everyone was smiling by then, even Jake who hadn’t taken his eyes off of the girl since she sat next to him. Y/N held her drink up in the air and the others did as well before everyone took a sip of their drink. Y/N sat down and Amy looked around the table to see if anyone else wanted to go.

Jake let out a sigh and grabbed ahold of his beer bottle. “Fine, I’ll go next. I am thankful that Thanksgiving only comes once a year. People stuff themselves, and then at midnight they run to appliance stores and trample each other to death. It’s a garbage holiday.” Jake sniffled and pretended as if he were about to cry. “I’m sorry. I just get emotional when I talk about how bogus Thanksgiving is.”

Y/N frowned and set her drink down on the table while Amy scoffed and muttered, “I’ll just go. I actually prepared a little something.”

“You did?” Jake asked in fake shock, but Amy ignored him.

“When I was a little girl, playing cops and robbers. . .” Amy began, but was cut off by the sound of someone’s cellphone ringing. That person happened to be Holt who quickly stood up and went to take the call. “Excuse me. Please. Continue, Santiago,” Holt told her.

A panicked look appeared on Amy’s face as she sisd, “Or I could wait.” “No waiting, just toasting. I want you to toast. Now I wanna eat toast. Give me some toast!” Terry exclaimed.

“Okay, I’ll be right there,” Holt muttered before walking into the room. He stuffed his phone in his pocket and looked to the group. “I have to head back to the precinct.”

“No. Why?” Amy asked. “Someone stole ten thousand dollars from the evidence lockup,” Holt explained. “That’s awful,” Y/N said at the same time her boyfriend exclaimed, “Yes! Oh, awesome.”

He stood up while everyone looked to him confused. “Why is that awesome?” Holt asked. “It’s a case,” Jake explained. “You said I could hop on any case that came up. It’s a Thanksgiving miracle!”

“Wait, Jake. Do you really have to go? I actually kind of wanted you to-“ Y/N began, but he was already grabbing his jacket. “I’m sorry, baby. I’ll see you later, okay?” Jake asked as he bent down to peck her cheek. He then stood up and grinned at the whole group. “Have fun, you guys. Let’s roll!”

And with that, Jake and Holt were walking out the door, leaving the rest of the squad watching after them.

A deflated look crossed Y/N’s face and she looked back to see everyone watching her sadly. “What?” Y/N asked. “We’re sorry. We know how much you were trying to get Jake to like Thanksgiving,” Charles said.

Y/N shrugged. “It’s no big deal,” she said as she forced a smile. “He doesn’t like Thanksgiving and that’s that.”

That was a lie and everyone could tell just from the look in her eyes. It was a huge deal for Y/N, even if it was just a stupid holiday and Jake hadn’t even made an effort to enjoy it for her. Y/N let her eyes drop down to her empty plate, ignoring the looks everyone was still giving her.

“Let’s eat.”

- - -

Y/N let out a small sigh as she put her head in her hands. This could not be happening.

After Jake and Holt and left, the squad had discovered that Amy didn’t know how to cook and that all of the food was disgusting, so the dinner had been ruined.

Wanting to fix it, Charles has suggested going to bar, but they had all been kicked out within minutes of being there. Now they were back the precinct, still all dressed up and still all starving, and Terry was trying to get to Scully’s secret food stash that was hidden away in the ceiling.

How it had come to this? Y/N wasn’t sure. But the one thing she was sure about was that this Thanksgiving was the worst one she had ever had. Maybe it was because she had been trying too hard to get Jake to like it. Maybe that had been her first mistake. After all, if she couldn’t even get her boyfriend to want to stay, then how could she expect to be able to host a great Thanksgiving dinner?

“Sarge, am I too heavy?” Charles asked, breaking Y/N away from the wallowing in her own self-pity that she had just been doing. She lifted her head up and let an amused smile break out onto her face once she caught sight of Charles sitting on Terry’s shoulders.

“No,” Terry answered the man. He then looked to Scully, a fire in his eyes. “Where is it?” “There, the one with the water stain,” Scully said. “There’s a lot of food up there?” Terry asked. “Yeah, it’s a smorgasbord,” Scully assured him.

Y/N perked up slightly as she watched Charles reach for the ceiling tile. Maybe Thanksgiving could still be saved?

However, Y/N was proven wrong when the tile slipped from Charles hands and fell to the ground, revealing old wrappers and rats. Everyone let out screams while Y/N groaned, feeling tears begin to prick her eyes. “Of course,” she muttered to herself. “Of freaking course.”

All she had wanted was to spend her favorite holiday with the man she loved and her new family and now not only had their dinner been ruined three times, but Jake had been gone the whole night just so he could skip out on Thanksgiving.

That plan she had? Yeah, that had pretty much gone out the window.

“I think the rats got to it,” Scully said. “You think?” Terry asked. “This is the greatest thing that’s ever happened,” Rosa muttered as she smiled at the rats.

Not being able to take anymore, Y/N shook her head and stood up with a sniffle. She wiped at her nose and quickly picked up what purse. “Okay, it’s over,” she said defeatedly. “I’m sorry everyone’s Thanksgiving was ruined. You all can go home now, that’s what I’m going to do.”

“Y/N, wait,” Amy called out, but the girl shook her head and looked around at her friends with tear filled eyes. “No, it’s fine. Thanksgiving is over. It’s dead. It was a bust. Just. . .I’ll see you all tomorrow,” Y/N muttered before turning on her heels and beginning to walk out.

“Y/N!” Charles called after her, but the girl was already gone.

- - -

“The money was still in the bookie’s safe. All the numbers match. Let’s head back to Santiago and L/N’s party,” Holt announced as he put the money into his jacket.

Jake frowned. He had been able to miss out on the party because of the case, but now that it was solved, what was his excuse?

Thinking for a moment, the man turned to Holt and gave him a small shake of his head. “Ah, no thanks. I think I’m gonna head home and watch the football game, which was ruined for me!” He yelled as he glared at the men they had just arrested.

“What’s your problem with celebrating Thanksgiving?” Holt asked. “It’s a sucky holiday,” Jake replied. “It’s always sucked. My mom worked. My dad was gone. And I sat at home, watching football.”

“Look, Jake. I came from a very formal family. My parents were not especially affectionate,” Holt told him. “Really? ‘Your Honor’ wasn’t a big snuggler?” Jake asked in amusement.

Holt ignored the man and continued, “But the beauty of being an adult is that you can make a new family with new traditions.” “Well, that’s nice, Captain, but I don’t have a new family yet, so I guess I’m stuck with my awesome old traditions,” Jake said as he turned to walk away.

Holt looked at him confused. “Even L/N?” He asked. Jake blinked abefore turning to look at the Captain. “What about her?” Jake questioned.

“She helped plan this whole night just for you and you don’t think she did that because she cares about you? Because she thinks of you as family?” Holt asked.

Jake blinked in surprise. “She what?” He questioned, not believing that Y/N would plan the night just for him.

“Peralta,” Holt sighed. “L/N planned this whole night for you so that she could show you how fun Thanksgiving can be. It’s her favorite holiday and all she wanted to do was share it with you, to show you how much it meant to her and how much it could mean to you if you let it.”

Jake shook his head. “I don’t think you get it, Captain. Y/N wouldn’t do something like that for me,” he told the man. “You sure about that?” Holt asked as he titled his head slightly.

He didn’t give time for Jake to answer before he sighed and turned to walk away. “Okay. I’ll tell the squad you couldn’t make it.” Holt then walked away leaving Jake by himself.

“Thank you,” Jake muttered, but instead of feeling even the tiniest bit grateful, all he felt was guilty for ruining the night that the girl he loved had planned for him.

“There’s no way,” Jake whispered to himself. Why would Y/N do something like that for him? Still. . .Jake let out a sigh of frustration before hurrying out the door and heading towards his apartment.

After all, he had to change into something nice if he wanted to make it up to his girlfriend, right?

- - -

“I’m here! I’m here!” Jake exclaimed as he walked into the meeting room where the group was all about to chow down on their Thanksgiving meal of foreign foods.

The squad all cheered while Jake, now fully dressed in a suit and tie, smiled and walked over to an empty seat. “Finally something to actually be thankful for.”

“What are you wearing?” Rosa asked in amusement. “Y/N and Santiago said to dress up, so. . .” Jake trailed off as he gestured towards his outfit. “Although, I did it mostly for Y/N. Okay, it was one hundred percent for Y/N.”

“I’d expect as much,” Santiago said. “Well, you look beautiful. That’s my thing now. I’m just owning it.” Jake gave her a grateful smile before his eyes flickered around the room, trying to find the eyes of the one person he really needed to apologize for.

A frown formed on his face once he came up empty handed. “Where’s Y/N?” Jake asked.

The whole squad fell silent and looked down at their plates, trying to avoid the man’s gaze. Jake frowned more and looked to his best friend. “Boyle?” He asked.

Charles looked up at his friend as a guilty look flashed across his face. “She went home,” he suddenly blurted out. Jake looked at the man confused before looking at everyone else for confirmation. “She what?” He asked.

Amy sighed. “She was upset about the whole Thanksgiving thing not going the way she had planned and you leaving, so she went home,” Amy explained.

“And you let her? Even when she was upset?” Jake asked as he quickly stood up. “You’re the one who left her!” Amy shouted in defense.

Jake frowned, knowing that she was right. He was silent for a minute as he tried to think of what to do before he let out a small gasp. Jake then looked to Charles and smiled.

“Boyle, can I borrow some of this food?”

- - -

Y/N stared blankly at the bowl of ice cream that sat in front of her, a million emotions running through her head as she did so.

By now she had ditched her dress for a pair of her comfiest sweatpants and one of Jake’s shirts that she had stolen the last time she was at his place. And as the events of the night continued to haunt her, Y/N began to stuff her face with ice cream, hoping to eat away her feelings and somehow make herself feel better.

Her therapeutic eating didn’t last long before there was a knock on the door. Frowning, Y/N reached over and turned on the TV in an attempt to drown out the knocking and get the person to leave.

However, the knocking only grew louder and more persistent the longer she took and she eventually let out a sigh as she reluctantly turned the TV off and went to the front door.

She threw open the door without a second thought, not caring about her appearance enough to even attempt to look somewhat decent. This was a mistake on her part and Y/N’s eyes widened at the sight of Jake Peralta standing before her dressed up in a nice suit and tie, a strong contrast from the clothes he had been wearing the last time she saw him.

“Jake,” Y/N whispered out in surprise. “What. . .what are you doing here?”

Jake’s eyes scanned over the girl and Y/N started to grow self conscious as she seemed to curl into herself in an attempt to hide how awful she looked. Jake only smiled and let his eyes lock with hers as he stared at her like he always did, like she was the most beautiful thing he had ever had the pleasure of seeing.

He then held up a small paper bag and Y/N was instantly hit with the smell of spices and something that she didn’t recognize but that had her mouth watering. “I brought food,” he said as if it answered everything.

Y/N watched him with weary eyes before smiling softly and taking a step back. “Come on in,” she told him making the boy smile as he did as she said. As he walked in, Y/N took the time to take a good look at Jake. “You’re wearing a suit,” she commented.

“Yeah, someone once told me that you’re supposed to dress up for Thanksgiving meals like this, but it seems I overdressed,” Jake teasingly said as he looked to the girl.

“Damn, I forgot I was wearing this. I. . .I’ll just go change real quick and we-“ Y/N began as she went to walk away, but Jake was quick to grab her wrist and halt her in her tracks.

“You look stunning as always, Y/N,” he assured her. Y/N softened slightly at that and felt herself relax as she looked at the boy. He blushed under her gaze and looked to the floor.

“Listen, I. . .I’m sorry for the way I’ve been acting about this whole Thanksgiving thing. I never really had a family to celebrate with, so it was hard for me to come to terms with the fact that now I do. You put in all this effort to help me have a nice Thanksgiving for once and I was a jerk and I’m sorry. Then there was the whole thing with the toast earlier and how I was rude after you had just said a nice toast. I’m sorry for that too.”

“What I really should’ve said was how thankful I am for you. You’ve made me a better person since the day we met and have given me everything without expecting anything in return. I’m so thankful for you, Y/N, and I’m sorry I don’t tell you that as much as I should. If it’s okay with you, I’d like to have that Thanksgiving dinner with you now. And I promise I won’t be rude or try and leave before it’s over,” Jake said.

He let his eyes flicker back up to her and he frowned slightly once he noticed the tears in her eyes. “You’re crying. Why are you crying? What did I do?” Jake asked, his voice coming out rushed and in a panic.

Y/N just smiled at the boy and shook her head at him before grabbing onto his tie and pulling him forward. Jake blinked in surprise at the sudden proximity and Y/N smiled lovingly at him before whispering, “I love you, Jake Peralta.”

Jake’s mouth fell open in shock before a goofy grin appeared on his face. “I knew it,” he whispered teasingly making the girl give him a look. Jake chuckled and leaned in slightly so that their lips were almost touching. “I love you too, Y/N. Always and forever,” he said.

Y/N smiled before tugging the boy the extra inch closer, resulting in their lips crashing together in a passionate kiss. They kissed for only a moment before Jake was relucnatntly pulling away.

“As much as I would love to keep kissing you and declaring my undying love for you, I just drove fifteen minutes here and the food is already starting to get cold,” Jake pointed out.

Y/N chuckled and leaned forward to peck the boy’s lips. “Then let’s get this food out and start eating! I’m starving!” Y/N exclaimed.

Jake let out a small laugh and pointed at the girl as she began to walk away. “I knew I loved you for a reason,” he muttered.

Y/N just winked at him in response before holding a hand it for him. He quickly took it and smiled in adoration at the girl as she began to walk them towards the dining room.

It was only when they got to the table and Y/N began to put the food out that Jake whispered, “Happy Thanksgiving, Y/N.”

The girl stopped in her tracks and looked back at the boy with a huge grin on her face. She leaned in and gave him a small kiss, a kiss that had him blushing slightly and smiling that goofy and dazed smile of his.

“Happy Thanksgiving, Jake.”

[adventuresloane]

The Million Ways The World Ends

Pairing: Dani/Aubrey

Rating: G

Words: 2.7k+

Raffle prize for @space-unicron !

Summary: "It was like before, when they worked in near-silence and with barely more light than the blue stovetop flame, so as not to wake up anyone else. It might as well have been just the same. Except it wasn't, actually. They'd been in the small kitchen for twenty minutes now, the longest they'd stayed in such a close proximity in weeks."

The world is ending, again. Dani and Aubrey decide to make pancakes about it. (Just some quiet pre-Amnesty finale hurt/comfort because we deserved it. Gift for @space-unicron on tumblr!)

Read on AO3

Aubrey was up at 4 AM and knee-deep in a Wikipedia article about the origin of leap years when the knock jolted her. After taking a moment to reassure herself that it was a person at the door and not a sign of worse to come, she let her breath out. She got off Duck's couch and went to the peephole. 

Technically, it wasn't impossible that she was hallucinating. It had happened before on nights like this--sometimes when she went long enough without sleep, she heard passing police sirens that weren't there, and once when she got her meds mixed up before bed, she thought she could feel the color blue. But standing outside the door, Dani's form looked solid enough. Her heart beat harder than it had been before, stirred up her insides into mush. She unlocked the door. 

"Dani," she said, and then, remembering the others in the apartment, tried more quietly, "Dani." That was all she could think to say. 

Dani, though, only had to look at Aubrey once and then glance away. "Have you slept at all?"

"No."

"You should."

"Well, so should you," Aubrey answered reflexively. 

"You know I don't sleep," she said in a whisper, all the more muffled as she turned her face toward the ground. There might have been a brief, tired smile there, or just a shadow.

Anyway, this, at least, was familiar. They'd had the same pointless conversation many nights, before everything had happened. Though usually, it had happened when one of them was standing in the doorway of the other's room at the lodge. But they weren't at the lodge. Still, this, Aubrey could handle. "Yeah, I know," she sighed. "Apparently I don't either anymore."

"I didn't think you'd be asleep."

She nodded, then waited for more. When Dani didn't give it to her, she scratched the buzzed back of her head and mumbled, "Um, so...do you need something? Everything's okay at Leo's place, right?"

"Yes. Yes, it's definitely fine, I just..." Her arms squeezed more tightly around the brown paper grocery bag, making it crackle. She seemed to remember, at that point, that it was there, and quickly held it straight out to Aubrey as if she were handing her a squawking baby. 

"Oh," Aubrey said a full two seconds before thinking to take the bag from her. She squinted into the darkness to see an egg carton, white bags full of several different kinds of flour, milk in a glinting glass bottle. "Uh...thank you for the groceries?"

Dani had always been quite a bad bluffer. She released the word, "Sure" in a long, heavy breath, not unlike the huff of a sad dog. Something else seemed to come out of her along with it, something that had been buoying her. 

It was getting chilly. "Is that it? Or do you vant to suck my blood?"

That wasn't what Aubrey had meant. She had meant to ask whether she needed anything, again, really. The shitty joke was supposed to have translated, however crudely, into an outstretched hand. But Dani hadn't taken it that way. She jerked as if in reaction to a static shock from the doorknob.

Pancakes, her addled mind put together in that moment. They were ingredients for pancakes.

"No, that's all," she whispered. "Sorry, I...you should keep trying to rest, or..."

"No, hey, hold on." Aubrey reached for her, almost grabbed the sleeve of her sweater, and then pulled her fingers back as if from intense heat. 

This, she realized, had already become a muscle memory. The flinch was her very body not wanting to repeat what had happened yesterday and in previous days.  This past afternoon, when she and Dani and the other Sylphs had made the trek to H2Woah! That Was Fun--the hot springs were closed to them now--they had sat on opposite ends of the backseat, Jake between them. When Aubrey had seen her standing alone over one of the pools and looking straight down, she had thought about it hard, had told herself to let it be, and then regardless had gone over to put a hand on her shoulder. To which Dani had immediately said, Don't, and then, Please. And it was fine, and it made sense that she wasn't ready for that, and it was alright that she was still grieving after Ned and the government and everything, and still of all things that had happened it was this that made Aubrey feel like throwing up into the deep end.

So she wasn't touching Dani now. Dani stopped anyway at her call, hair swinging as she turned her head back towards her. 

Even in her disguised human form, there was a moon-like shine to her eyes. The pupils looked almost glossy.

Aubrey kind of wanted to apologize, though she wasn't sure for what. She swallowed that instinct back hard and said instead, "Do you want to make pancakes?"

For a moment, she said nothing. Then, quietly, but in a voice that sounded more alive than she had in weeks: "You have to invite me in first, you know."

The sun was far from rising still. But the sky held a little more of blue than of black now, to more starkly outline the silhouette of the crater that had been Mt. Kepler. Duck got up at six, out of habit, though since the encroachment of the FBI on the town, his Forest Service duties had been reduced, and he didn't need to head into work as early. They had a couple hours alone. 

It might as well have been like before, in the lodge. They didn't have the stainless steel surfaces of the building's kitchen--stainless steel that they tried not to muck up too much, lest they invoke Barclay's grouchiness--but this was far from the first time they'd made insomniac pancakes in the wee hours. Dani mixed dry ingredients with the sifter. Aubrey whisked the batter hard. Eggs were broken and left a little shining goo on the edge of the granite countertop, which they resolved to clean later. It was like before, when they worked in near-silence and with barely more light than the blue stovetop flame, so as not to wake up anyone else. It might as well have been just the same. 

Except it wasn't, actually. They'd been in the small kitchen for twenty minutes now, the longest they'd stayed in such a close proximity in weeks. Aubrey spoke one or two hushed words at a time, telling her where the pans and utensils were in the unfamiliar kitchen, and sometimes she didn't even speak to do that, just gestured with her spatula or foot at a cupboard door. In the lodge, their quiet had been the quiet of kids at a sleepover after lights-out, warm in the darkness, struggling not to giggle or to look each other in the eye for too long in case their laughing started up again. They had smeared batter on each other's noses. That felt like a long time ago. The only thing they'd had to worry about back then was disturbing Mama, who at that time would either be asleep or up late working on her art, always there somewhere. Mama wasn't anywhere now. Probably nowhere that existed according to the government, anyway.

Aubrey flipped a pancake straight out of the pan and over the back of her head. 

She wheeled around only to find Dani dropping to her knees on the tile. She caught the pancake in her palm just before it hit the ground. Then she intoned, "ow, ow, shit, ow," flipping the hot, floppy thing frantically from hand to hand so as not to let it fall, the harshness of her whispers making up for the lack of volume. 

"Wait, wait, I gotcha, just hold up--" Aubrey brought the pan over, down to her level. Finally, in sailed the offending pancake like a live fish on land. Even in the dim light, she could see Dani's reddened hands. Both froze, crouched on the floor, locked in eye contact while they waited to hear whether anyone had been woken up by all that. No sound came.

Dani cracked first, with a snorting laugh she tried to muffle by hiding her mouth behind her hair like always. Aubrey wasn't far behind, giggling through her teeth until she sounded like a hissing kettle. They alternated laughing and shushing and more barely contained laughing, calming down only to glance at each other again and start right back up, and this went on for maybe a couple minutes before Dani's voice changed and Aubrey looked up to find her crying. 

"Oh, honey..." 

"It's fine," Dani blubbered, scrubbing her eyes. "I'll be fine, I'm sorry."

"It's not fine," she murmured, swallowing the lump in her own throat. She looked out the window. "You can cry it out if you want. The world's falling apart and everything's shit."

"Falling apart?" She almost laughed again, wetly. "It's fallen. Mama's not even..." She choked herself off.

Aubrey gulped hard again. Gulped down her desire to brush the tears away with her thumb. Gulped down how much she wanted to feel the smoothness of Dani's cheek like a balm on her hand. Her fingers twitched. Instead of putting them on Dani's shoulder or knee or face, she stood and then, holding her breath, held her hand out. 

Through her tears, it took Dani a moment to notice the gesture. She took a few more just to blink in surprise. Aubrey felt her chest about to burst.

Then it was her turn to be surprised. Dani, instead of taking her hand, grabbed her upper arm to pull herself off the floor. Aubrey didn't know whether to jolt away from the touch or melt into it. She did neither. She just stayed steady and stiff. Still, Dani kept touching her bicep. First she clung to it. Then, after awhile of her sniffling and struggling to regain her breath, she started to trace the black tattoo on Aubrey's upper arm. There was just enough light from outside now to see it plainly. 

"It's the Black Rabbit of Inlé," Aubrey murmured. "Watership Down was my favorite book as a kid."

"Mm?"

"Yeah," she sighed. While she talked, she felt her own breathing start to regulate again, though she hardly realized she'd been struggling with it before. If she could keep talking, she was still okay. They both were. "I got that after my mom died. He's the rabbit grim reaper, basically, in the characters', uh...weird rabbit mythology. It's cooler than I'm making it sound. Anyway, he's scary, but you find out in the myth towards the end of the book that he can be fair, too, and even kind of merciful."

As she went on, Dani didn't look at her directly, only nodded and "mm"ed occasionally. Early on in their relationship, this was something that had confused and then embarrassed Aubrey. She had assumed that Dani was annoyed by the rambling and simply too polite to say anything. They had had one of their very few fights over it--or, rather, they had come as close to an actual fight as they ever had. When Aubrey, with no small amount of passive-aggression, had said that Dani could leave if she didn't like hearing her talk, Dani had whipped around to look at her with such shock that Aubrey couldn't fathom how her next sentence could be a lie. I do like it, though, she'd said. I just want to hear your voice as much as I can, no matter what you're saying.

Dani wasn't actively crying anymore, just sniffling now and then as snot kept dripping from her nose. "I like Fiver best," she said in a voice that was only a bit hoarse. 

"So you have read it!"

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, the way she sometimes did when she grinned. "You mentioned before it was your favorite."

She tried to ignore the familiar surge in her chest, the good ache that almost overwhelmed her. "Figures you'd like the shy, spiritual one. I was always a Bigwig fan myself. Hey, I burnt the hell out of this pancake. You still wanna make more?"

They did. When they were done, they sat on the couch with their plates and ate and watched with parched, tired eyes as golden light peeked over the broken mountain. On the night that the great stone peak was destroyed, it sent up so much debris and powdered rock into the air that the sun looked pale and watery in the gray sky for days afterward. It lent a certain authenticity to the end of the world, a certain movie quality that was almost validating. Now, after the disturbance caused by the destruction of the mountain, the animals were starting to congregate again in the area. The birds in the morning sounded louder in the now quiet town than they ever had. Or maybe they had always been there and were now simply more noticeable. That, too, was to be expected of the end of days.

The pancakes tasted good. While she had a second serving, she tried to keep a running tally of things that still existed, for now, anyway. Birds. 5:18 AM breakfast. Her own encyclopedic knowledge of Watership Down. Presumably, Watership Down itself, assuming the ragged copy in her room hadn't vanished from the shelf. Sunrise.

The woman tucked up against her, having set her plate aside. Dani had always done something to her. For her entire life, Aubrey had tried to get a hold on her perpetually scattered, racing thoughts and wrangle them into order. As it turns out, Dani could quiet them, gently, with just a touch, just the presence of her body. Right now, Aubrey could feel them settling to the bottom of her skull like sand in a slow-flowing river. In the past, no matter what monster she had faced, she could stumble back to find Dani waiting, always waiting at the lodge, steady and calm and content to let Aubrey lean against her as she stretched. That seemed like a very long time ago.

Aubrey almost wanted an apology, though she wasn't sure what for. She pushed the  idea aside. She tried to focus on Dani's cool, soft skin against hers. The sense of familiar calm returned to her, like a loyal pet. Everything, objectively, was shit. Mind-blowingly, deathly awful, actually, if you counted the FBI and the aliens and the distinct possibility of interplanetary war. And it didn't feel that way, just now. It felt like she could evade it all, like the thin girl by her side could hide and shield her from all of it. All the world will be your enemy, Prince of a Thousand Enemies, and when they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you. The still dim, compact living room had the feeling of a den or burrow. The two of them had the feeling of two creatures huddled in the dark, small in the grand scheme of things, but absurdly alive.

"Did you like your apocalypse pancakes?" Aubrey asked.

"Even better than insomnia pancakes."

"Are you scared? About, you know. Everything."

Dani really seemed to think about it before saying, "Kind of...no?"

"That's pretty insane of you, I'm not gonna lie. You're either incredibly metal or you're lying."

"You know I can't lie," she answered wryly. "And, well, I've seen it before, you know. The world ending, I mean. My world ended for the first time when I left Sylvain. I thought I'd die."

Aubrey nodded. She understood. The world had ended on the night her childhood home burnt down. Again when Ned died, when Mama left. Though she was ashamed to admit it, it had even, in some smaller way, ended when Dani seemed to be done with her. She felt that she could lose almost anything else so long as Dani was with her. And here she was, and so, somehow, just in this moment, there was nothing to fear. "Guess the world's always ending, huh?" Aubrey said. "The universe keeps trying to nerf us and we just won't die." 

"It ends all the time in a million little ways." By now, Dani's fingers had worked their way in to weave between Aubrey's. She squeezed. "But you and I won't."

[amydancepants-peralta]

46. Argument leading to kissing/sex for the prompts? 🥰

Sooo I really wasn’t going to make this smutty.  And then, ya know … smut happened.  Here goes.  I hope it fills the prompt okay!

*NSFW*

I like the way it hurts

The day had held such promise when Jake and Amy had walked out their front door that morning.  Amy had been clutching two reusable coffee cups filled with precious homemade caffeine (because this way they were saving the planet and saving money, she’d stated with pride the first time they used them), her body turned away from Jake as he’d locked up.  His hand had slid over her waist briefly, wandering dangerously low before leaning in to drop a gentle kiss to her neck, and when she’d looked over at him in mock indignation he’d thrown her a wink, grabbing one of the cups of java.  

Their laughter had bounced off the staircase as they’d made their way down to the car, neither of them aware of what the day had in store for them.

Fast forward to this evening, their angry steps heavy against the wooden planks as both face resolutely forward.  Both were waiting for the other to throw the first grenade, and the tension between them was palpable.

Jake waits until they’re crossing the landing to their apartment before taking the first shot.  “All I’m saying Amy, is that Boyle and I had been working that case for weeks before you came along.  There were things that we knew that couldn’t be contained to some dumb report.  You should have taken my opinions on board.”

“I’m a Sergeant, Jacob.”  If he was going to full-name her, then she was going to do the same.    “Sometimes, there is information that I am privy to, that I cannot disclose to you.  You know that.  And despite that, you went against me.”

Two of Amy’s uniformed patrol officers had been conducting a routine walk by today when they had noticed two familiar faces walk into an unmarked building.  Chaze Wagner and Tyler Melton - the two men currently on the APB for their alleged involvement in seven robberies, five assaults, two counts of drug trafficking, and a partridge in a pear tree.  To put it simply, they were Not Good News, and their location had been reported through to Amy without haste.

Under her direction they had run surveillance on the building, holding until further instruction; while Amy, knowing that Jake and Charles had been working on a case involving these two, had headed straight to them for the update.     

Having come out of a meeting with higher-ups earlier that day, Amy had shouted clear instructions  as they suited up: for them to hold their positions with the patrol officers on scene until the ESU had arrived.  Given the location, there was the ever present danger of civilians being involved; and it had come to her attention that Wagner and Melton were working under the hand of D’Antonio (a much bigger fish), and if they played their cards right they just might walk away with all three.  

To his credit, Jake had followed instruction without question.  Until, that is, he saw another man - someone that he and Boyle only knew to be a man named Andrews, enter the building.  Someone that, in his eyes, was the worst of the lot, and before he remembered that he was NOT on point, he had been running into the building, gun raised and shouting out instructions.

If he had waited, if he had explained what he had seen, then maybe Amy would have had the chance to tell him what she knew.  That Andrews was FBI running undercover, and that his links to the majority of the crimes had been deliberate.

But he hadn’t listened, and had dove head first into the fray, and under Amy’s shout the squad had followed.  The resulting altercation had left Andrews in hospital with a gunshot wound to the shoulder - struck by the men he had been deceiving - Wagner and Melton in custody; her officers limping back to the station with varying injuries, and D’Antonio still at large.  It was a semi-successful operation, that could have been far better, and the result had left Amy seething.

Needless to say, things had been very tense back at the precinct as Jake and Charles processed the paperwork on the two arrests.

“On paper, Andrews was bad news, Amy.  The things that our sources had told us he’d been involved in ran longer than what the other two had done, put together.  He was incredibly good at getting away when things take a turn, and there was no way I was going to let him do it again.”

Yanking her key out of the lock, Amy shoved the door open and waited for Jake to walk through before slamming it behind him.  “Yet another reason to fill out your paperwork properly, Detective!  If all of that had been ‘on paper’, like you say, then you would have been told about Andrews’ involvement in the operation.  And then maybe you wouldn’t have run in there, guns blazing, and two of my officers wouldn’t be on medical leave right now!  Not to mention all that undercover work, that has now gone up in flames!”

“Well, you should have TOLD me that!”

“You never gave me the chance!”  Letting out a frustrated growl, Amy reaches forward, grabbing Jake by the tie and yanking his mouth towards hers.  He’s surprised by the sudden change of pace but only hesitates for a moment before pushing right back, teeth clashing as their tongues duel, fighting for dominance.  Her left hand is still wrapped around his tie and she uses it to pull him even closer, right hand heading straight for his hair and tugging with just the right amount of pressure. 

He pulls away with a gasp, hands gripping both of her upper arms as he stares down at her, jaw set in anger and eyebrows knitting together.  

She wasn’t ready for the kiss to end, and she wasn’t interested in talking right now. She lets go of his tie in favour of slapping him against the chest - not hard enough to hurt but enough to let him know that she was hurting. He pulls back slightly, frustrated, but does nothing. Not that she needed to be concerned.  Jake would never hit her.  He glares back at her, and she hits him again with less force.  

He picks up on her cue, and before another thought can be made Jake has dropped his grip on her arms, grabbing her wrists and pushing them upwards until they’re above her head, pressing into the door.  He’s pinned her there, hips holding her into place as she cranes her neck forward, desperate for another kiss.  There is no hesitation, and they sigh into each other’s mouths as their lips move.  

One hand still gripping her contained wrists, Jake uses his other to roam Amy’s body, hand heavy as he follows the curves he knows so well.   Her belt, heavy with equipment, falls to the floor with a clunk, and her regulation navy blue pants soon follow.  Having half a mind to quickly push off her work boots, Amy takes the opportunity to kick her pants across the living room, moaning into Jake’s mouth as his hand grips her thigh, pulling her closer to him.  

His hands are in her underwear within seconds, deft fingers working her up the way only her husband has ever done, and Amy finds herself pulling against the restraint of Jake’s wrist around hers, desperate to wrap herself around him completely.  He tightens the grip in response, and she waits until he’s pulling back from their kiss to bite his lower lip in retaliation.

His eyes flash as she pulls away with a satisfied smirk, and he releases her grip before yanking at her blouse, buttons bouncing off the floorboards as they scatter.  She gasps at the destruction of her beloved uniform, wrapping her arms around Jake’s neck as he lifts her, hands gripping her ass as he stumbles back towards their living room.

Shaking her head, Amy grips Jake’s hair in her hand, steering him toward the bedroom in between hot kisses.  From her current vantage point she can reach the plaid covering him easily and she makes quick work of it, pushing it as far down his shoulders as their position allows before sinking her teeth into the base of his neck.  There had been many a hickey marked in this spot in the years they had been together, and there was no chance of that changing anytime soon.

Her bra ends up somewhere between the hallway and their bedroom, and as he throws her unceremoniously onto the bed Amy lets out a breathless moan.  She needed him.  Now.

Flannel and pants cast aside without a second thought, Jake crawls up the bed to meet Amy, pulling her in for a heated kiss as he tugs at her underwear, letting her legs take over as they lower.  His follows hers soon after, and with a nudge of his knees to her thighs he’s pushing in, both releasing a sigh as the scratch began to be itched.

He sets the pace quickly, spurred on by the dig of her nails into his back, and before too long they’re both a mess - a jumbled set of limbs and breathless moans racing for completion.  

In an attempt to stave off his impending climax Jake begins to trail kisses along the side of Amy’s jawline, teeth skating at the edge of her earlobe as he travels further, moaning into her skin as one of her hands move to card through his hair.  

His eyes flit to the right and for the first time he clocks the beginning of her bruise, taking in the dark hue spreading across her tan skin.  She can pinpoint, almost exactly, the moment that he realises just how much he fucked up, and that the consequences for said fuck up didn’t end at the precinct. 

He tunes his attention back to her, gaze apologetic as he leans in for another kiss, far more tender this time. His pace slows as his hands land on either side of her face, holding her close as he tries to make his amends with every twist of his tongue against hers.  It’s all very sweet, and the apology is appreciated. But she wants to be fucked, and hard. 

She bends, taking advantage of his hands on her face by wrapping her legs around his waist, jutting her right hip forward and forcing them to roll.  He grunts at the unexpected change of pace, fingers digging into her skin as she begins to move. 

“Oh my god, Ammmess …” he moaned, and Amy felt the shiver run down her skin. 

She loved when he did that - held onto the M sound of name, sounding it out like he was saying Mmmm.  It made her feel … delicious.  Jake said and did a lot of things that made Amy felt treasured, but this just may be her favourite. 

He looks again at the bruise, seemingly unable to look away, and she cups her hand against his cheek, gently pulling his face back to hers.  She smiles down at him as their eyes meet, hips still rising and falling, resting the other hand against his chest as she leans down to kiss him softly - a juxtaposition to the pace she has set.  “I’m fine, babe.”

Jake simply hadn’t seen it.  Hadn’t noticed, during the fray, when one of the perps had gripped Amy by the shoulder, pushing her with all of his might against one of the walls, hand reaching back in preparation for another blow.  She’d been bracing herself for the onslaught when Boyle had grabbed the man by the waist, yanking him backwards until he’d hit the floor.  Jake had missed it all, too busy wrestling Wagner to the ground, and she’d been quietly nursing her arm all afternoon. 

He noticed it now, though, and she could see the cogs turning in his mind.  Reaching into her mental bag of tricks, Amy squeezes her inner muscles against his length, leaning down to rest her forearms on either side of the bed as she changes angles.

His eyes squeeze shut as he throws his head back, moaning as she moves up and down, and Amy licks along the edge of his Adam’s Apple, waiting until his head has dropped back down before pulling him in for another kiss.  

They stay like this for a hot minute before Jake’s arms are wrapped around her, twisting until she’s underneath him once again.  He smiles down at her in victory as she grunts at the change, nose rubbing against hers before kissing the bridge.  

Amy moans as her husband thrusts harder, reaching underneath to tilt her hips just so, hitting her at the perfect angle over and over.  Her legs tighten around him, hand reaching up to grip his hair as the sensations begin to overwhelm her.  His pace has turned erratic, and she knows that he’s not far away from it either.

She twists her head, nipping gently at his earlobe as she whispers harder into his ear.  HIs responding sigh leaves shivers down her skin as he cups the back of her head with his free hand, before raising himself onto his upper arms as he really begins to pound into her.  

This.  This is what she had been needing all afternoon.  Her body begins to shake, desperate to move with him but also too incapacitated to do anything other than stay still, absorbing the push of his hips against hers as they both race towards completion.  He fuses his mouth to hers, tongue thrusting against hers in perfect match to their movements below, and when they break away he whispers how much he loves her, how much he needs her, and how very sorry he is.

She answers him with a sharp cry as her climax takes over, fingers pulling at the roots of his hair as she tightens around him.  It all proves to be too much for Jake, and while she continues to ride the high he joins her, face buried into Amy’s neck as he calls out her name, pouring himself into her as he stills.         

Heartbeats continued to pound as they lay together, sweaty skin sliding onto sheets.  

Heartfelt apologies would come later, along with steadfast declarations to listen for the other before jumping off the deep end.  These were rules that they both knew, and for the most part stuck to.   But every now and then, something would challenge their commandments, and today had been no different.

Proving to each other each time, that together they had something worth fighting for, was what set them apart.  And they wouldn’t change that for anything.

[peraltasames]

when you’re scared and alone (just know that i’m already home)

Jake is in prison, and Amy is three days late.

so emma @fourdrinkamy prompted me w this and i may or may not have teared up a little writing the last part and had to remind myself that they are together and happily married now omg enjoy the angst

title from already home by a great big world

read on ao3

It takes Amy three days to notice that she’s late.

It shouldn’t take that long, she’s as meticulous about her period as everything else in her life. She marks them on her calendar each month and checks taking her birth control pill off her to-do list each day. Never before in her life has she been three days late.

Never before, though, has she been spending hours after each shift combing through files upon files about Melanie Hawkins and her team, looking for the slightest inconsistency or slip-up. Never before has she been surviving on four hours of sleep (if that), fuelled by coffee and the motivation to get her boyfriend out of jail before he’s beaten or shanked or worse.

It isn’t until Friday morning, while she’s sitting at her desk yawning after a particularly long night and jotting a note down in her calendar to visit Jake’s mother this weekend, that she spots the little X marked on Tuesday of that week.

Twenty minutes and one frantic trip to the bodega across the street later, she’s perched over the sink in the precinct bathroom, waiting for a tiny symbol to dictate whether or not her life is about to change drastically.

She’s thought about kids a few times over the past year: watching Jake play with Nikolaj in Charles’ living room on Christmas Eve, babysitting Cagney and Lacey and realizing maybe they could handle parenting after all, helping her nephews build a blanket fort after dinner at her brother’s house. These thoughts have materialized in her brain as a faraway possibility for after they’re married. Ideally, she would already be a lieutenant or higher. Ideally, the father of her child would not be indefinitely locked up in a prison a thousand miles away.

Just as she sets the timer on her phone for three minutes as instructed by the box, the bathroom door swings open. Amy cautiously looked around the bullpen before scurrying off to take the test and made the judgement that the few women on the floor had gone to the bathroom recently enough that she would not be interrupted. Her worn-out, panicked brain did not take into consideration that Gina is very pregnant and gets up to pee very frequently.

“Amy, what are you - oh.”

By the time Amy meets her gaze, Gina is already looking at her with complete bewilderment.

“Are you-“

“I haven’t looked at it yet,” Amy says quietly.

Gina nods, slowly approaching her as if she’s made of dust and the slightest movement could make her disintegrate on the floor. It dawns on her that she must look as weak and helpless as she feels.

“No matter what it says, you’re not alone,” Gina promises her, her hand cautiously grabbing Amy’s, still gripping the edge of the counter for support. “You guys are gonna get him out, and even if you don’t…you’re not alone, okay?”

The sentiment of her friends supporting her is comforting, but another person being here, knowing that she may actually be carrying a child, tips the scale in her brain from stress and worry to full-blown panic. She isn’t alone, she knows that, but no support system could make doing this without Jake any less terrifying.

Nothing could make the idea of raising a baby, his baby, without him there every step of the way an even remotely acceptable possibility.

She doesn’t feel the tears until they’re soaking into Gina’s shirt over her shoulder, barely registering the sobs until they’re wracking her body and she’s clinging onto her friend for dear life.

“It’s gonna be okay,” she hears Gina say, her voice sounding distant, as though Amy is underwater and drowning.

“I-I can’t do it without him-“

“I know, girl. I know.”

The vibration of her phone, accompanied by the same loud, repetitive beeping sound that wakes her every morning, makes Amy jump out of Gina’s arms.

“Do you want me to look?” Gina asks, her eyes a little softer and more sympathetic after seeing Amy completely unravel before her. She’s kept most of her breakdowns since Jake’s been gone private and tries to put on a brave face at work, knowing that they’re all missing him and Rosa too.

Amy nods weakly, shakily wiping away tears with the sleeve of her blouse. She waits as Gina surveys the three tests on the counter (all different brands, to get the most conclusive result possible) and looks back up at her.

“All negative.”

The two words pass over her with a wave of relief, her body collapsing back against the wall behind her and sinking to the floor.

“I’m not pregnant?” she sputters, making sure she heard her correctly.

“You’re not pregnant.”

Gina comes to sit on the floor next to her, shoulder-to-shoulder, and pats her knee gently. Amy leans into her slightly as her stream of thoughts begins to clear.

“I’m three days late.” She tries to make sense of her body’s tardiness now that the most likely explanation is off the table, coming up with nothing. “I’m never late.”

“If you want, I can bring you to my OB/GYN appointment after work today to get checked out,” Gina offers. “She’s dope, we listen to Beyonce during my ultrasounds.”

Amy musters a small smile, nodding her head.

“Thanks, Gina.”

-

Just like every day, regardless of whether she’s still at the precinct or already home for the night, Amy is waiting anxiously by the phone for Jake’s call at ten o’clock. She picks up on the first ring, as always.

“Jake?”

“Hey, babe.”

His voice rings through her ears like a symphony. Their daily half-hour phone calls (as long as he can risk without a guard walking by) since he managed to acquire a contraband phone have been heavenly interruptions from an otherwise Jake-less existence.

“How are you doing?” she asks. “Is everything okay?”

The pause on the other end is a little bit too long, but it’s followed by an assured response that she knows is only for her benefit. “I’m doing okay. Just missing you.”

She subconsciously wraps his warmest, coziest blue hoodie tighter around her body. It’s one of the only ones that she hasn’t already worn to the point that she needed to wash it, one of the only things that still smells like him after nearly three weeks.

“I miss you too,” she sighs. “So much.”

“Is something wrong, Ames?”

It’s truly a testament to how well he knows her that he’s able to detect that something is off from so few words. She’s spent the past two hours since returning from the doctor’s office wrestling with whether or not to tell Jake about her false alarm today, or about the cause of it, which Dr. Abrams referred to as “alarmingly high stress levels.”

Though she doesn’t want to burden him with worries concerning her (she thinks she’s worrying enough for the both of them), there is nobody that she wants to - needs to - talk to about this more than him.

“I, um-“ she fiddles with the edge of the comforter, closing her eyes as she lets out a deep breath. “I had to take a pregnancy test today. I was three days late.”

“Was it - are you-“

“It was negative, don’t worry.” She cuts him off before the worried thoughts that had saturated her brain earlier today can reach him. “It was just scary for a minute.”

Once again, her head spins with anxieties over the thought of what may have happened if the test had been positive.

“You never miss your period. Did you see a doctor?” His voice has lost its confident steadiness, a facade that she can tell he puts on for each phone call just to ease her mind.

“I did, I’m totally fine,” she swears, hoping that she’s convincing enough to put his mind at ease. “It’s just, you know, regular stress.”

It would be a better lie if she hadn’t been stressed about something every single day that he’s known her.

“Ames, please promise me you’re taking care of yourself,” he pleads, now discernibly worried.

“I’m good, babe, you don’t have to worry about me.”

She adds it to the growing list of lies she’s told him lately: yes, I had dinner; no, I haven’t been crying; work was fine; I left the precinct hours ago.

“Okay,” he says, voice still laced with skepticism. “I’m really sorry I wasn’t there for you today.”

Her heart breaks, as if it can shatter any further. It is so annoyingly, utterly Jake to apologize for not being able to comfort her when he’s the one behind bars.

“God, I love you,” she murmurs, tears falling onto the pillow supporting her head.

“I love you too,” Jake echoes, the words heavy with the weight of the miles between them. “And Ames, about the test…we’ll do that for reals one day, okay?”

She has to believe for her sanity that he’s right, that it won’t be fifteen years and that they won’t miss their window. The idea of doing the whole “married with children” thing with anyone else is not an option that she’ll even begin to consider, as she told her mother shortly after Jake received his sentence. He’s been it for her for a long time, probably even longer than she’s realized.

“We would have cute kids,” she agrees, a small smile creeping on her face at the idea of creating something that is half-her and half-Jake (god, she hopes they get his hair and her organizational habits).

“The cutest. Our kid would put Terry and Charles and Gina’s kids to shame.” She can practically hear his trademark grin through the phone, though it’s a poor substitute for the real thing.

They spend the next twenty-eight minutes talking about hypothetical kids and the life they’re going to continue to build together. Afterwards, she sleeps the best she has in weeks, dreaming of the day that their happily ever after is no longer on hold.

[shaniahnoel]

Everything Has Changed: Chapter 8

Word Count: 2164

Warnings: Cuss words

Author’s Note: I feel like I have to explain myself to my anon inspiration as he/she seemed to really love Fearless (while still liking EHC). Since beginning it, EHC has been my favorite fiction to date and so I wrote a lot more. While Fearless is posted to where I’ve written, EHC posts are chapters behind what I’ve actually written. I just stopped posting because I felt like no one was interested and I lost my spark to get on here. 

Master List

Iris didn’t take to the motorcycles as well as Riley had. She’d had her ride with Fangs, thinking that she might be more comfortable with his larger frame. After riding with Toni, however, she realized that Fangs was a terrible driver. The quarry had a fair scattering of Serpent youth, and Iris lingered in her shadow. Fangs threw a possessive arm over Iris’ shoulder, while Toni linked arms with Riley.

“Clear attachment makes meeting Serpents a hell of a lot easier. I love them, but they can be assholes,” Toni explained. Fangs snickered in response.

“Way to state the obvious, Topaz. They both know Sweets.”

The Serpents sitting around on the couches didn’t look inviting as Riley and Iris approached, but the animosity lessened when they realized who her father was. Deciding the best course of action was to fake comfortability, Riley threw herself onto the nearest couch, leaving a gap so that she’d be in between Iris and other Serpents. Toni perched on the armrest while Fangs collapsed onto the ground in front of her, back pressed into her knees.

“Thinking of joining,” a Serpent asked Riley, piercing her with deep green eyes.

“I haven’t really thought about it honestly. I’ve always admired the family vibe here, though. It’s solid.”

Satisfied by her answer the girl turned back to her friends, leaving the four in their own bubble. There was a stretch of silence, broken only by a sneeze and the wheeze of the cushion as Riley brought her knees up to her chest. Fangs grumbled at the loss of her hand in his hair and turned around to face the girls.

“So, what could possibly have gone so wrong that you girls dove willingly into the Serpents den?”

“My best friend is an asshole. Clearly it’s genetic because so is Iris’ boyfriend.”

“Ex,” Iris said quietly, causing Riley to flip onto her knees to stare at her friend more directly.

“You’re done? Like done done?”

Iris nodded, water welling up in her eyes and Riley put an arm around her. The girl looked so broken that even Toni slipped a hand down to her shoulder. Fangs dug his heels into the ground, studying the small dirt piles forming as if they held life’s secrets.

“What happened?”

“I’m just done with his bullshit. The cheating, the lies, the double standards, it’s all bullshit.”

“He cheated again,” Riley asked, clenching her hand. This, she thought, was the ultimate problem in undefined relationships—Jake always argued it wasn’t cheating because they weren’t dating but got pissed if she talked to another guy.

“Well, yes, but that wasn’t what pushed me over the edge,” Iris answered slowly, and a small flicker of annoyance flared up inside.

“This has to do with Kieran and me, doesn’t it?”

Iris nodded, biting her lip. Riley sighed, rubbing her temple where a headache was forming.

“I have elective with the two of them, third period. Kieran went off about your fight over Fangs and Sweet Pea this morning. Kieran was on the usual rant against the Serpents, but then Jake brought up whether you’d screwed either of them. He said he didn’t think so, and then Jake suggested he make a move quickly to stake his claim…”

Iris trailed off as Riley pulled her phone angrily from her pocket, reading the apology for the first time. It sounded genuine, heartfelt, but all based on staking a claim. She exhaled slowly, breath hissing through her teeth.

“Is that all?”

“Well, I told Kieran that he didn’t deserve you at all. I also told Jake that I wouldn’t be with someone who talked about my best friend like that. He called me a bitch, and I told him maybe so, but I was no longer his.”

“Damn, and everyone thinks the Serpents are what’s wrong with the Southside,” Toni said, shaking her head in disbelief. Riley wrapped her arms around Iris, holding her until the tears had subsided once more. When she was done caring for her friend, she realized she needed to take care of herself.

“I’m going for a walk,” she said to no one, shaking her head as Iris made to follow her. Through an overgrown path in the woods there was a shallow portion of Sweet Water River. The days had grown colder, but Riley couldn’t resist the feel of water rushing past her. She rolled up her pant legs and discarded her shoes and socks. There was a rock only a few feet out from the riverbank, projecting out above the flowing water. She waded out to it, navigating carefully over the smooth rock bed, praying that her perspective perch was as dry as it appeared from land.

It shouldn’t have been so surprising. Kieran had been her best friend for years, she’d seen the way he was with other girls. Maybe it was just that she’d never expected it to come her way. She wasn’t the best friend he’d fallen for, but a means to attack the Serpents. What was his problem with them anyway? They’d never done anything to him. Or to her. Serpents had only cared for her, truly been there in her darkest moment. Thinking of the accident sunk her mood lower into the swirling emotion.  

She wasn’t sure how long she’d sat there, only that her feet and butt had gone numb. The breeze caused her to shiver, but there was something cathartic about the experience. Her outside matched the inside and it seemed poetic. Maybe a little painful as well. Glancing down she realized that her toes had begun to turn a delicate blue—it wasn’t just an expression of literature, apparently. As she gently lifted herself from the rock to ease back into a standing position, the peaceful silence was broken.

“There you are,” Sweet Pea’s voice rang out. The sudden boom of his voice startled her out of her reverie and she jumped. Her numbed feet weren’t prepared and fled out from underneath her. She landed heavily in the icy water, shrieking as cold flooded into her clothes.

“Shit,” he cursed, and Riley turned to see him hurrying towards her, his feet surprisingly sure across the water. He bent down and scooped her into his arms; she pressed herself into his warmth, fully aware of just how cold her body had gotten. If he was uncomfortable, she couldn’t tell, his gaze stayed forwards as he winded his way expertly through the woods back into the clearing.

Most of the Serpents had dispersed, save Fangs and Toni who were right where she’d left them. Iris was leaned against Fangs shoulder, a small smile lingering on her face. Her toes ached as life started to flow back into them and her cheeks flushed as Toni stood up, looking concerned.

“She’s fine, Topaz. She just fell in the river.”

“You and rivers,” Toni said, shaking her head as she smiled in relief. “I figured that’s where you went, but you were gone a little while.”

“Just a lot to think about is all.”

“Did you decide who gets to stake their claim,” Fangs asked, barely flinching as Toni slapped the back of his head.

“Desperate much, Fogarty,” she attempted to tease, a tinge of sadness still in her voice. Sweet Pea lowered her to the ground and she stumbled to the couch, curling her feet under her. She tried to ignore the way the denim clung to her. Fangs slipped his leathers off and wrapped them around her, rubbing a hand down her arm briskly.

“She’s a popsicle, SP. Chill,” Toni said so quietly that Riley wasn’t sure she’d heard correctly. Sweet Pea fell onto the couch beside her, a scowl etched into his face. He sat as close as Fangs did, leg pressed against hers, but there was something much more preoccupying about his leg. Fangs removed his arm from her shoulder, but left it slung over the back of the chair. Riley fought against another shiver that threatened to rock through her.

“Nah,” Fangs said, finally answering, “I know that I’m a ladies’ man, plural, not a lady’s man.”

Riley snapped her fingers in mock disappoint. “Know any guys who are down for commitment and can cuddle without becoming sexually frustrated?”

Iris snorted. “I don’t think you’ll ever get that second qualifier,” she said.

“Fiiiine,” Riley mock pouted. “I’ll settle for someone who actually cares about me, not my body or the people he might piss off.”

She’d tried to keep her voice light, but nothing had ever sounded faker. Fangs arm twitched behind her but retracted. Sweet Pea’s arm took its place, curling around her. There was a protectiveness in the gesture, lost in Fangs’ play and Kieran’s possession. Sighing deeply, Riley remembered the days she was afraid to have a guy look at her. Glancing up at Sweet Pea she realized that she was still that girl, when the guy had eyes that seemed to see through her entirely. The shiver that followed wasn’t purely due to the chill.

“You need to go get changed before you die of hypothermia.”

“It’s not that cold.”

“Your lips are literally blue. Sweet Pea can take you home, he has his truck. You’ll turn into an icicle on a bike.”

“Where do you live,” Sweet Pea asked, a hint of exasperation in his voice.

“Right off third,” Toni answered for her, giving him a pointed look. “Not even out of the way.”

“Out of the way for what?” Riley asked, but Sweet Pea ignored her.

“Alright, let’s go.”

 The ride was silent. Riley’s face flushed as she remembered the last time that she’d been alone with Sweet Pea and his truck. Another Serpent’s bike roared behind them, continuing to Sweet Pea’s house as they turned onto her street. When they’d walked to the vehicles, Riley had learned that Sweet Pea was only just far enough from her house to have a different bus. The gravel crunched beneath his truck and Riley groaned as she looked at the clock after taking in the empty driveway.

Sweet Pea turned to her expectantly.

“I forgot they were heading to Greendale. Mom said if I wanted to go, I needed to be home by 4.”

Sweet Pea laughed as he too glanced at the clock. “4:05, very punctual.”

“Oh shut up,” Riley laughed, pushing his shoulder. The smile on her face wavered uncertainly as he caught her gaze and held it.

“That’s a new laugh,” he said, and, unless her eyes were deceiving her, there was a faint flush to his cheeks.

“I only use it outside of school,” she said as dead pan as she could. Sweet Pea rolled his eyes, probably thinking that she was an idiot—a thought she wouldn’t have held against him. But then he laughed, not with any hardness or mirth, but with what seemed to her to be pure happiness.

“Where are you off to after this,” she asked, quickly regretting it as the carefree teen was replaced by the teenage gang member.

“Serpent business,” he said roughly. Riley deliberated a second, wondering what that mean.

“Be safe,” she said quietly, squeezing his tensed fist briefly before slipping out of the truck. The wind was freezing, but thankfully the heat of the truck had gotten her mostly dry. It wasn’t until she opened the door that he started the truck back up. She twitched back the curtain to watch him go.

In the next hour she had a scalding hot shower, chasing away the cold and questionable smell of the river and settled onto the couch to continue her rewatch of Criminal Minds. Three episodes in she went and locked the door between the garage and her house because, in the words of Jason Gideon, no one ever thinks to lock a door behind a locked door. It was dark before her stomach began to growl, demanding the food she’d forgotten to make. She was surprised to see that it was already 8:00 p.m. but it was no surprise that her mom and sister weren’t home yet. This trip to Greendale had been to visit the Asbury’s, longtime friends of the family. Her mom needed the support, but Riley had no interest in awkward small talk with their teenage son. Ellie would probably be staying over—they had a daughter a year younger who thought Ellie was the coolest kid she knew. Which, Riley thought, may be true.

As Riley cooked the noodles, she wondered if this was a glimpse into life after high school: binge-watching old shows and forgetting to eat. Not a bad future, she mused, but she wasn’t desperate to fast forward the two years. She jumped as the timer went off, making a mental note to avoid shows about serial killers when she lived alone. When she finished eating she cleaned up her mess and retrieved her bookbag from her room. Before she could start her work, there was a knock at the door.  

Tag List:  @ella-full-of-secrets @my-ships-have-sunk@54fangirl@everheart12@inspiredbynewt@poolpartyingwithjaws@southsidesserpent@lynniev @karleedaniels27 @the-greatt-perhaps @lilybellsworld @cherylblossom-komwonkru @oldestfairytale

[theosymphany]

Under the sun’s warmth

Piers came to slowly, being very aware of a warm body beside him and a pair of beefy arms that held him close from behind. He smiled a little, taking a deep breath and taking in the warmth and the pleasant scent of his partner. Chris was quiet, which meant that he must have been awake.

He turned, trying to get a glimpse of Chris but it was hard without straining himself.

“Morning.” He said, lazily twisting himself slowly to face Chris.

“Morning.” Warm brown eyes greeted him with a small smile.

“You’ve been up long?”

“A little. It’s cute to watch your sleep. And wake.”

“Creep. Your arm must be sore.”

“Well actually it’s quite dead.” Chris squirmed as Piers moved to let him retrieve his arm. “Ow, ow ow!” The pain was evident on his face as blood rushed back in.

“Sorry.” Piers said, rubbing along Chris’s arm to get the blood back in.

“Hurts like hell, but it’s ok, all worth it.” Chris winced, then smiled again. “Or is that an excuse to feel me up?”

Piers withdrew his hands sharply. “Excuse me, who had his hands inside my shirt while I slept?”

“You’d complain it’s cold otherwise.” Chris said, with heavy lidded eyes.

“It is kinda cold. What time is it?” Piers glanced over at their alarm clock.

“Hmph, still early, and oh.”

Chris must have felt him go stiff because he held his wrist. “It’s OK babe.”

Piers shook his head, as if trying to forget. “July first…. It’s hmm, six years now.”

“Yep.”

“Well I remember it for a different reason. It’s six years after our reunion six year ago!”

“Ha. That was sweet too, even though I didn’t’ realize it at the time. We should celebrate with, uhh, a big bottle of Rakija and the scent of cheap hooker’s perfume.”

“You know, for a big dumb American you blended in pretty well to Edonia.”

“Yeah well, guess all that training is muscle memory now. As I recall you guys stood out like sore appendages. Guess who’s the sniper?”

Piers was suddenly wide awake. “We were not running intel Chris. We wanted to be visible and we wanted to find you!”

Chris grinned in apology. “Well well. That always gets a rise out of you.”

Piers sighed softly. “It was really stupid what Command did to us. Forcing you back in the outfit on a mission doomed from the beginning.”

“Like you said at the time, the world was going to hell in handbasket and the mission didn’t have a sliver of a chance if you all went without me.

“I said that?”

“Yep. Turns out you were truly capable enough on your own, Acting Team Leader Nivans.”

Piers was quiet for a moment. “I know that I wouldn’t have done half the stuff I did if you weren’t there beside me. You fight for the ideal. I fight for the personal.”

“Give yourself more credit than that. You did right with Jake and Sherry, and all the other decisions you made there.”

“But…”

Chris cut him off and put an arm around Piers’ back. “There is great strength that comes from protecting those you love. You made the sacrifices and you made it happen. I can’t ask for more than that. Well, except spend the rest of our lives together, and some secret room service couple of times a week.”

Piers face planted on Chris’ chest. “Here we are all serious and you let your other head do the talking.”

“Oh hell no. He does all the talking where you’re involved.” Chris said with a wink.

“So it’s a Sunday, what are we gonna do today?” Piers said, resolved to change the subject.

“Hmm, easy morning, take Ruff out, food, some woof time and whatever else?”

“That’s like most of our weekends.”

“That’s good right? Or you want more adventure? White water rafting with zombies?” Chris’s eyes sparkled with mischief.

“I want as few reminders of nasties as possible. No humidity, no water and no tentacles. Something American, homey…. Hmm I know. That Southern BBQ place that has the massive meat platters that has way too much food for two people. I want that.”

“Ha. Always planning his food first. That’s my Piers. I’m in hungry mood today and don’t fancy cooking so hell yes! And it’s too much food for two people, but not two people and a four-legged black hole when meat is concerned.”

“Oh yes! We have to bring Ruff along, you’ve got the rug and picnic set in the car. There’s a nice trail up nearby on the hill. He can run off lead and we can enjoy the sun.”

“Sounds like a date.” Chris kissed Piers on the top of his head.

“Thanks for buying lunch.” Piers kissed the crook of Chris’s neck.

“I am?” Chris asked, then shrugged. “I am.”

--

The little hill was windier even on a warm summer’s day. The wandered along, Chris holding Ruff’s lead while the GSD went exploring and working off those wings and brisket and pulled pork and hot links.

“One good thing about all that distant control is we don’t really need this anymore.” Chris said, gesturing to Ruff’s lead.

“More us time.” Piers grinned.

“Hey look, there’s a swing near the trees over there. You thinking what I’m thinking?”

Piers looked around. “No tangos in sight Captain.”

“Good boy.” Chris said. Ruff yelped happily somewhere and Piers shook his head.

“There’s only one seat.” Piers said as they got to the swing.

Chris tested it for his weight then nodded in approval. “It’ll take.”

He sat first, then motioned for Piers to join him.

“If you insist.” Piers said cheekily as he straddled and sat himself on Chris’s lap.

The warm rays of the afternoon sun shone through the west and Piers can see it had bleached some of Chris’s hair. His face took on a softer glow, though he can see a few new lines on his face. If anything, they added to his confidence, his authority.

“What are you thinking?” Chris swayed gently on his feet.

“Of how beautiful you are with the sun on your face.”

“Thinking just the same thing.” Chris said, leaning in. “You still take my breath away every day.”

They danced their lips around each other, gently savouring each touch, planting kisses light as a dragonfly skimming across water.

Piers nuzzled his face next to Chris, feeling the little pricks from his stubble. Chris held him in his arms as they swayed gently in the breeze.

Piers could feel Chris’s heartbeat, and the warmth from his arms joined with the warmth of the sun. The hold was solid and he hugged Chris back, thinking of nothing else but to be in the moment, desperately drowning out everything else.

Slow sniper breaths. The sky was blue, the clouds tinged with orange. The grass was more green than yellow, but only just so. There’s the call of birds, rustles of insects in the grass, the odd creak and groan from the swing as they swayed in time to his breaths. Chris was rubbing his back soothingly and he realised he was squeezing a bit too tightly.

This is real. All of it, and he is here. All of him.

Ruff watched from a distance his daddies locked in love. He tilted his head, half expecting the whistle for him to come but knows that he’s probably got more time freedom to roam still. He found a warm spot in the sun and sat low, keeping a vigilant eye on their surroundings. His favourite humans are going to have all the time and peace in the world.

Another year another July 1st Tribute. Thanks for the rest of the fandom for their works and support. I based the final scene on @daemoncollection‘s gorgeous work Under The Sun’s Warmth - http://fav.me/dcfwyal which is reblogged above. Shoutout to @nimrod262 as without his encouragement this work wouldn’t have happened.

[melaenis-ficente-blog]

A Heart’s A Heavy Burden || Dark Squad + Dragon Tales

Summary: Jake Long the American Dragon challenges the dragon deep within the woods for possession of Howl’s heart...

@american-dragon @oh-heartlessman

 JAKE:

Here is a thing about dragons:

They are old creatures and they have been around long before humans and will very likely continue to be around long after humans. There are dragons and there are Dragons, but dragons had walked the earth far longer than anything remotely human. They are creatures of legend and the old and Jake had not actually ever seen one up close before. In America, you see, most of them had been driven away, as cities rose up, as skyscrapers tore through the air, as the world changed and magic faded from the land.

Dragons -- capital ‘D’ -- revered dragons and they knew to give them the utmost respect.

Now, Jake had gotten whiff of the dragon back when it first broke through the house on Main Street and took to the air. Fu had pestered him about going to see the dragon and pay proper tribute to it.

“Smells different, that one,” grumbled Fu. “Could be dangerous.”

But Jake was -- Jake was an eighteen-year-old boy finishing up his last semester of secondary and he wanted to skateboard and he wanted to watch movies with his girlfriend and he wanted to study for his history final (okay, so he didn’t really wanna do that but that was the stuff he should be doing, ya know?)

Then there was the case of one Kiki Takayama.

Jake had returned home from school one day and Fu instantly lumbered up to him and demanded they go to the hospital to see her, because she was a sorceress from a long line of powerful Japanese witches and really, Jake should’ve introduced himself earlier. Especially since they had been in the same weird alternate Grecian household or whatever.

So, Jake showed up with a bunch of peonies and that was when he learned the full story of the dragon in the woods.

The dragon in the woods was not a full dragon, as Fu had suspected, but the shadow of a sorceress. And in her clutches was the heart of one sorcerer. Actually -- it was Melaenis and Howl, who had been Jake and Kiki’s weird alternate Grecian masters or whatever. But the fact of the matter -- Howl was in danger, as long as the dragon still clutched his heart.

Now why it had taken Jake a solid month to make the trek to the dragon’s cave was another story, which he tried to say was because of finals and stuff, but really, he was a bit nervous. Fu had given him dragon prep and he’d finished the last of his exams before actual finals season and here was a free weekend before prom and stuff, so off the the woods he went.

He was in his Dragon form, flying through the air, with Fu on his back. Fu had on a knapsack, filled with some old Chinese trinkets that he had in his old trunk. Jake didn’t ask about the coin around Fu’s neck; after the whole sphynx cat in the park incident, Fu had not said much about Yan Yan or the coin and very much avoided Jake’s questions on the matter.

He soared through the sky, his little wings giving him an extra lift as he cut upwards through the air and made a loop (“WATCH IT KID!” yelped Fu, clutching on tigheter) and then dove back down. The cave was easy to find and Jake landed with a soft thud. Fu got off his back, getting back down onto all fours.

The opening of the cave was dark. Jake raised his neck, wings curling into his back, and trod over to it. He could definitely smell the dragon -- and the magic that permeated everywhere. His tail brushed against the forest floor, sweeping closer towards him.

“Hello?”  called Jake, in the dragon language. “I’m here to, uh.”

“He seeks an audience with the dragon,” said Fu, in Beast. “As a member of the Order of the Dragon, he wishes to offer a tribute.”

THE DRAGON:

The dragon had claimed this quarry and this forest for her kingdom two and a half moons ago.

Two and a half moons was a blink to a creature such as herself. And yet in that blink, the dragon had amassed her fortune steadily, her caves brimming with gold, relics, and fine cloth. In the eyes of a dragon, it was nothing. In the eyes of a dragon, even her home here was but a humble little pocket of the vast, brilliant world-- a world that belonged to her. She should not have to curl up in such a cramped cave. She shouldn’t have to hiss and spit at the farmers around this delicate ecosystem to provide her what was her own. She should not have to entertain so many fleshbag-visitors, their blood dull and magic-less, their minds clouded with arrogance. Knights and farmboys and would-be lords. None of them scared her but all of them made her restless.

This was her kingdom and it should be given, not taken. She was a dragon and she should be worshipped, not plotted against.

Each day, that restlessness grew and she dreamed of starting from scratch. She entertained herself with these fantasies: scorching the town down into ash so she might grow something new; offering the townsfolk their lives if they took a knee and burning half of them just to hear the screams anyway; leaving this little town entirely and seeking her own-- she heard stories of a dragonhold in the east, in the Himalayan Mountains where men were few and the weather wild.

She was stopped every time by a whisper.

It was her stupid witch.

Somewhere around the turn of the second moon, her witch had woken just enough for the dragon to feel her consciousness pushing against her own. It was her daughter that woke her more than anything else: Magdalena Rose the size of a foal now, flying on her own. She brought back a tattered spellbook in her talons one knight, a prize fitting of a witch, not a dragon. She’d cocked her head, that crown of feathers fluttering as those round, blue eyes gazed curiously at the dragon, as though she were waiting for something.

This is a common spellbook, the dragon said to her offspring. This is not a thing of great magic.

Magdalena Rose chirped low, the sound more birdsong than dragon, and the dragon blinked: seeing the witch press a kiss on the creature’s plume of feathers.

Then the daughter skittered farther into the cave, back toward her father-- who might find such childish drivel charming-- and the witch disappeared.

But these moments, where the dragon felt the veil of her power fade, became more frequent. Whenever the dragon filled her mind with visions of fire and blood, the witch asserted herself. No, she hissed.

When the voice of the Dragon-Boy came, the witch opened her eyes again.

But the dragon was still in power. The dragon was the one that rose from her half-slumber and smelled the air, rich with that ancient, rare magic of the Dragon guardians. It had been a long time since she’d smelled anything like that...since the demi-god came, oh how she still wanted him for herself…

Perhaps the Dragon-Boy would stay. If not, she’d break his fragile hide and bless the front of her cave with his blood.

No, said the witch.

Shut up. The dragon rose and slipped toward the entrance. Her great head emerged from the shadows and peered down at the small creature, more wyrm than dragon, more hatchling than full-grown. Oh, the forms of the Dragons had always made the dragon laugh. To Mundus, they seemed ethereal and powerful-- until they saw what a real dragon should look like.

Even his Eastern kind made this one look a fool. But a prize was a prize.

A tribute, repeated the dragon, sounding amused. And what does a young Dragonling such as yourself have to offer me? And why have you taken so long to deliver it? I should punish you for your tardiness alone.

JAKE

Fu glared at Jake, because honestly, there was no good explanation for why Jake had taken so long besides adolescent foolishness. Jake crunched some leaves under his claws, shifting his weight to his back haunches and glanced at Fu briefly. He felt really in over his head, especially seeing just how flippin’ big this dragon was -- hell, this dragon could so easily crush him with one snap of her jaws. Not to mention the deep, dark magic that was radiating off of her. Jake’s Perception only usually worked in his Dragon form and boy, was this dragon absolutely stinking of dark magic.

Fu cleared his throat.

“I apologize for his tardiness,” said Fu, dipping his head lower. “He is still a young one and adolescent troubles got in the way.”

Damn, why was Fu suddenly Mr. Speech Man?

“Uh. Yeah. Sorry finals and stuff. Uh.” Jake raised his neck, tilting his head back towards the dragon, before trodding over to Fu and gently taking the knapsack between his teeth and shaking the contents onto the forest floor.

Out toppled a few jade sculptures and some bronze vases filled to the brim with gold coins.

Holy shit Fu, thought Jake, making a mental note not to pay for Fu’s pizza order because apparently the dog was loaded.

“I hope these tributes will be okay,” said Jake, dipping his head and nudging one of the vases towards the dragon. As he lifted his head, he took a moment to survey the back of the cave. A heart would be small and he wasn’t sure where to even begin to look, but a peek was as good a start as any. “We can help you take them inside.”

THE DRAGON:

Ugh. Millennials.

Still, the dragon lifted her head and made no move to slay the Dragonling, while he fetched the knapsack full of treasure. The dragon’s nostrils flared. She could smell the metal and could name each mineral residing in the knapsack-- jade, gold, bronze.

Sure enough, these treasures spilled out, clanking against each other, music to the dragon’s ears.

But back in the time of dragons, such a gift would not be enough from a Dragonling and certainly not one that had already insulted a queen such as herself. At the height of her power she received herds of cattle, from sheep to cow, along with piles and piles of gold, carried in wooden wagons, drawn by beautiful, white horses. The Dragonling would have provided either all that wealth or something of even greater importance: something of great and rare magic.

A jade sculpture, a few vases, and a fistful of coins were nothing to her.

But this was not the time of dragons. Her disappointment soured in her mouth. The urge to maim him anyway rose and rose-- and then the witch appeared again, a flash of her seaglass eye in the mind of the dragon. And it wasn’t worth the fight, nor was it worth, she supposed, spilling the blood of one so unique, even if he wasn’t smart. That would bring a Council of Dragons at her doorstep. And oh, she’d always hated politics.

Very well, she intoned instead, her voice measured, betraying nothing-- not her pleasure or displeasure. Bring the items in, Dragonling. And tell me your name, the name of your family, and how it is you have come to Swynlake.

The dragon then turned back into her shadowy cave, her tail sweeping behind her. At least this afternoon would not be a dull one. Perhaps she would have a new trophy by the time all was said and done.

JAKE

All things considered, Jake thought this was going very well. And by very well, he meant that the dragon hadn’t totally eviscerated him in the first three minutes, so things were pretty good.

Fu, meanwhile, shifted nervously. Jake didn’t notice this. He just ducked his head in reverence and followed the dragon into the cave. Fu skittered behind him, haunches raised, eyes darting around the darkness of the cave. He sniffed around, the dark magic clinging to every last rock and crevice.

Jake followed the dragon, gazing around.

Oh, uh. I’m Jake Long. Of the Fuijan Longs. But I’m from Brooklyn. And, uh, well I’m just here ‘cuz the Council wants all candidates for National Dragons to, like, have experience in international places, ya know? Especially America, ‘cuz Americans are whack.

He tried to laugh a little, but in Dragon form, it came out like a growl that echoed through the cavern walls.

“Oh! Darling -- have you brought me a present?” called a voice.

Jake raised his head, peering over the dragon’s shoulders to see a scantily clad Howl Pendragon walking towards them.

Jake’s first thought was DO NOT LOOK AT HIS CROTCH.

His second thought was now where is that heart.

“What a fine specimen,” said Howl, waltzing over to Jake and peering up into his eyes. Jake blinked, glancing from Fu to the dragon, then back to Howl. He wanted to ask if Howl was okay, but Howl seemed...fine? Happy, almost?

He tried to remember what Kiki had said, about Howl’s heart being held captive, about how he had no free will any more. About how he would die if the heart wasn’t returned to him.

“Uh. Hi, Howl. Do you remember me?” asked Jake, speaking in human tongue. “Kiki and I were your, uh, charges during Greek Week.”

“Oh, yes! That was a lovely week. Just me and --” His voice faltered and he stood, glassy-eyed, unblinking for a good three seconds, before he cocked his head. “Where are my manners? Come on in -- I’ve made some lovely avocado toast for Diablo when he gets back.”

THE DRAGON:

Out flew Diaval to collect the treasures from the ground and carry them into the rest of the hoard one by one. The dragon swept into the cave with her new, knobby-kneed envoy behind.

She did not think much of the guardian dog as he huffed and snuffled around her cave. Guardians and familiars were brainless creatures, especially the canine variety, much too concerned with security for their charges-- and so the dragon merely assumed the guardian was sniffing out potential traps and pitfalls. She was glad her witch had attracted a clever bird. They were less concerned with safety than with opportunity.

The Dragon-boy, meanwhile, was so dumb as to be mere child. His adolescence had only thickened his stupidity.

But he came from a wonderful line, didn’t he?

Because the dragon knew the Fuijan Longs. The line of Dragons was a prosperous, well-known one, going back generations and generations. And the older the magic, the more powerful it was. Or so the rule went, though the dragon herself had found an exception in one ambitious, dragon-eyed witch from Florence.

It was the boy’s magic alone that kept her from growing instantaneously bored and turning his pretty scarlet scales into jeweled dressings for her home. Though her mood might change as the weather did and whether or not she determined he was more useful dead than alive.

The sorcerer appeared then, ever the curious fool. The witch stirred again at the sound of his voice, but the dragon ignored the witch and drifted further into the cave, until she reached the bed she had made out of the most beautiful of her treasures. She settled into it, a shower of coins tumbling over her scales. Her eyes slanted as she watched Howl scurry around like an ant to serve their...guests.

Tell me of the world, said the dragon after just a moment of watching. Is Swynlake the first place you have visited, Dragonling? Are there any of my kind left in...what was the stupid word you said? Brooklyn?

Her heart hungered for news of her sisters and brothers. Even if it were only rumour, like the tales of the dragons in the Himalayas.

JAKE

There were no dragons in New York City.

Maybe there had been, once upon a time, but not since white people had come to the land and driven out all that was magic and all that belonged. That’s what some of the older Dragons had told Jake, anyway, and some of the fairies in Central Park and some of the gnomes that lived under the subway system. Magic still lived in the city, of course, flourished even, some would argue, if you knew where to look.

But there were no dragons.

Maybe in Montana or Wyoming or someplace with mountains and a big sky. Canada, Jake knew, had a thriving frost dragon population in the north and even some old forest dragons and mountain dragons. Texas was rumored to have some desert ones, too.

Not in Brooklyn, Jake answered, as Howl shuffled around to get the avacado toast. But in, uh, Texas. Which is close. Sorta. I haven’t met any in America. Just Dragons -- like me Dragons, not you dragons.

He scanned around the cave, trying to figure out where the heck this heart thing was. Fu was stoic, sitting like an actual dog and waiting patiently for Howl. But he glanced at Jake and sniffed loudly. Jake wondered why the fuck he did that -- then realized. Oh, duh. Of course the heart wouldn’t be, like, out in the open. He had to use his other senses.

“Here you are,” said Howl, and a plate of avocado toast gilded towards Jake. He caught it between his teeth, trying to get a scent of Howl’s magic and see if he recognized it anywhere else around the room.

So, uh, nice place you got here, said Jake, and he tilted the plate so he could snatch the toast on his top teeth  and pull it into his mouth. The plate floated away from him and he munched on the toast,  looking around the room.

His eyes caught a little orange flame resting upon a pile of gold. That was weird.

The magic smelled stronger there.

Wow, that’s a lot of treasure. Do you want us to bring the new stuff over?

THE DRAGON:

The dragon did not know of any place called Texas, just like she did not know any place called Brooklyn. She could imagine what these places looked like though: all concrete, metal and asphalt, massive buildings sprouting  up from the ground where Mundus all swarmed in their suits. When she had been alive and free, the world had yet to be shaped by the hands of men. All those metal forests were just dreams in their minds. Instead the world was beautiful, lush, and green, and there was enough space for dragonkin. They roamed the hills, the jungles, the wide and deep rivers, the mountains, the plains. And each one of her brothers and sisters were unique and powerful. Their magic inimitable.

But men came and had to name everything. Their languages were crude too, their tongues clumsy. They knew nothing of true names. They stole the magic from the places they stuck their flags in and spoke in the harshest of tones. Brooklyn. Texas. Disgusting.

And so the Dragon boy’s story made the dragon want to sigh and rest her head again. The longing pounded inside her for the world as it had once been. She hated this cave, she hated the Dragon boy who knew nothing of true power, she even hated the sorcerer that her witch loved, watching as he wasted his magic preparing toast. He was a ridiculous, petty, shallow-minded thing. She hungered over the magic inside him and missed the shadow she’d once danced with through the sky. Both of these things were wasted on him too.

And so, bored and tired, restless and lonely, the dragon had nothing but the treasure she had surrounded herself with. Her eyes flicked to the Dragon boy who had brought her a few more of these trinkets and the dragon thought only of those.

Yes, boy. Add your gifts to the pile, she answered and said little else, having lost all interest in the Dragon boy; he could tell her nothing else. He could give her nothing else.

Her eyes drifted away from him then and toward the glittering crystals encrusted in the cave walls. They murmured of magic. She listened to their gentle conversation and felt at least a little better. She had found the most beautiful place in this forsaken forest. If she must be alone, then here was a good place to build.

JAKE

It was now or never.

Jake had imagined several cool action sequences in his head before and they were always set to Ruff Ryders’ Anthem by DMX, so in order to pump himself up, he played that song in his head as he trod over to where the creepy raven thing had dumped the treasures and carefully picked them up in his mouth, walking over to the treasure horde.

He eyed Fu, who was pretending not to pay attention to him (at least, he hoped that Fu was pretending) and instead in deep conversation with Howl. Jake caught a snippet of what they were talking about -- something about deep conditioner.

Jake took a deep breath, dropping the trinkets onto the treasure trove. They clattered onto the jewels and the coins and other valuables and Jake darted his eyes, pretending to organize the vases and set them upright. Really, he was sniffing, try to scout out where exactly this heart was --

“Psst kid,” a little voice piped up and it took all of Jake’s incognito training not to jump up. “Over here -- the flame -- it’s me.”

Holy shit -- the fire was TALKING TO HIM?!

Uh, dude. What?

“You don’t have much time, she’ll hear. What you’re looking for -- it’s buried under me -- quickly, pretend you dropped something.”

Jake froze for a second, a necklace still between his teeth. He opened his jaw and it fell.

Oh no. I should get that.

He dug his claws into the mound, trying to find something that was not supposed to be there.

THE DRAGON:

At first the dragon realized nothing.

She had no reason to suspect. Her mind drifted, she breathed deeply the magic of her cave and even the forest beyond this one. For the dragon, everything was connected in a fine network of energy, magic like blood, pumped by the heartbeat of the world that lived deep in the core of it all. And she, born from earth and fire and sky, knew every part of it. It was the magic that sustained her now. It was the magic that she had become when the men had first come to slaughter her body, not realizing that a dragon’s soul did not easily die.

It was magic that was left, now that everything else was gone. It was all she had. 

And so she did not realize what the Dragon boy intended until he stuck that measley claw into her treasure and reached for some of her most precious magic at all.

The sorcerer’s heartbeat pumped harder as the Dragon Boy’s claws found it. Badumdum. Badumdum. Badumdum. It sang only her name.

And the dragon whipped her head around, mouth opening at once to show off every single one of her razor sharp fangs, catching the thief in the act.

She roared at once and rose from her bed of treasure, whipping her tail toward the boy. Coins, goblets, plates, jewels flew into the air and she wacked the Dragonling down.

HOW DARE YOU! Her voice thundered. She lunged toward the boy with fire sparking in her mouth.

JAKE:

Oh shit.

Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shitshit shitshit shit shit shitshit shitshit shitshit shitshit shitshit shitshit shitshit shitshit shit shit shit shit shit.

Shit.

This was not good.

Before he could process what was happening, his claws wrapped around something soft and fluttering, and then the full force of the dragons tail smacked him across the face. He tumbled down on the pile of treasure, coins flying everywhere, but righted himself as soon as he was able to.

His own heart thumped in rhythm with the one he held in his claws.

The dragon lunged, but Jake was prepared and kicked up from the floor, flying into the air. He sharply turned as he neared the ceiling of the cave, and his back skimmed the rocks, as he weaved in between the stalactites.

“FU!” he yelped.

That was the cue -- Fu started to bark and ran towards the entrance of the cave.

All Jake had to do was somehow manage a hairpin turn and get the FUCK outta here. He just had to do it. It was now or never. He had to face the angry beast behind him. He had to do it --

With a roar, he made a sharp turn, the dove towards the cave floor.

THE DRAGON:

First the apprentice witch had come, with her demigod in tow. She had left them in ruins and they had fled here in pieces.

Next, the child from the Order, playing knight in his armor and insulting her with the brandish of his magic shield. She’d crushed the shield and smashed the boy. He, too, fled, a dog with his tail between his legs.

And now the Dragon Boy had come, another after the heart of the sorcerer.

The fury filled the dragon, blinding her with it. She lunged for the boy ready to snap him in half with her teeth. This time, there would be no survivors and no one would escape. There would be a corpse, a body, a mid-day snack. First, the boy, then the sniveling hound. And if her fury was not satiated--

If there would only be more boys, more witches, more demigods, more traitors, more thieves, come to collect what was rightfully hers--

She would swallow Swynlake whole.

With a thunderous roar, she snapped her jaws right as the Dragon Boy ducked. He slipped below her jaw and then up toward the ceilings. The dragon’s snout crashed into the wall, shaking the entire cave. A cloud of dust blossomed through the air, dirt and rock raining down.

The dragon roared again and pushed off the wall. Fire erupted from her salivating mouth, a jet of it shooting down the cave toward the boy. And though he was small and agile, she would not let him escape. She’d learned from her skirmishes with the others--

The dragon smashed her entire massive body up into the ceiling, dislodging a line of stalagmites. They fell like knives and blocked the path of the thief, causing him to veer up again. But there was nowhere else to go.

There was just the dragon, the fire, and her gaping jaws.

Surrender now! She commanded him. Or I will burn you and the heart both!

JAKE

He heard his mom’s voice.

Not Gramps, chastising him and swatting a roll of newspaper at him. Not Fu, grumbling and mumbling and making sarcastic comments under his breath.

It was his mom he heard in the back of his head.

I’m disappointed.

There was nowhere to go -- just the dragon, only the dragon, her mouth wide, the teeth bared. Maybe if he had trained more, maybe if he had made some better plans, maybe if he had come earlier, maybe if he was just…

If he was just better. Not some half-Dragon mutt, whose mother was human-locked.

“KID!” Fu’s voice was barely discernible under the dragon’s roar.  “We gotta get outta here! Just drop it -- “

Jake looked straight on. There was only fire, only darkness -- she would kill him if he didn’t comply.

He drifted down from the air, landing on top of the pile of coins. His feet scrambled a little and a few of the treasures tumbled down, but he managed to steady himself and set the heart down gently. It was still warm.

“I’m sorry,” Jake whispered, to the flame that had spoken to him, not even sure if it heard. And he stepped aside, head ducked down, as he walked down the hill and towards the dragon.

It’s yours, he said. I surrender.

THE DRAGON:

Yes. Hers.

She’d claimed it. She had spent weeks and weeks guarding it, and before that, weeks and weeks waiting to claim it for herself. The witch had not been brave enough to act on the selfish wants of her own heart, but the dragon was not so weak. She still remembered how it beat in the palms of the witch’s hands. She tasted its magic even now, with smoke still billowing from her nostrils. That magic was why she found this cave and hid the heart deep within it. It was hers. Hers, hers, hers!

Enemies! Knights! Liars! Thieves! They all came for what she had earned.

Nobody, not even the wizard himself, deserved that heart-magic, which made it beat strong there upon the floor of her cave.

And the dragon realized that as long as it did beat, the heart would be vulnerable. Her enemies would be many and oh, they’d come. They’d come with wand, sword, or wit. They’d pretend to befriend her. They’d betray her inevitably-- even Diablo was no friend to the dragon, even Soleil would eventually hunger for the heart-magic too. The only friends the dragon ever had died long ago. Her kin was near extinct. There was no one to trust, no one but herself.

Herself, and the heart. Mine mine mine.

She would swallow it whole and then it would always be hers.

Then watch, Dragonling, hissed the dragon. She swept toward the beating heart. It beat faster, thrumming alone and dirty on the cold ground. Watch and spread my message to the rest of the forest. There will be no more Heart of Howl Pendragon. His death rests on your shoulders.

“NO!” cried a voice in the cave. Was it the insipid fire demon? The boy’s Guardian? She didn’t care. She relished in the protestation. And when the wizard fell limp, she would burn him until he was nothing but bones.

The flames caught in her mouth again. Mine mine mine--

Then deep within, the witch opened her eyes.

The fire halted and the dragon suddenly threw her head back as though she’d been struck by an invisible hammer. She jerked again. A strange cry, reedy and thin, slipped from between her teeth-- more human than beast. She wailed again and a spout of fire ejected from her maw up toward the roof of the cave as the fire sprouted like flowers between her scales.

And as quickly as it began, it ended, and through the smoke sat a naked woman, her eyes glinting ruby red. She reached for the heart and then stood slowly, on legs that felt too small and thin after months wearing a dragon’s skin. But she found her balance and took one step, and then another, until she emerged through the smoke with her head lifted.

She clutched that beating hard so tightly, one might think her nail would puncture through. She clutched it, the magic thrumming its way through her veins as though it were her blood. It was why her eyes still glowed red. The dragon was still close, so close. (The dragon would always be close.)

“Howl,” she called to him. And the heart beat quicker, calling for the wizard too.

JAKE

His head was ducked down and he was prepared to begin his walk of shame towards the cave entrance. His own heart was pounding in his throat and he wasn’t ready to face Fu. He stood under the dragon, unable to meet its glowing red eyes.

He’d fucked up, he’d royally fucked up and --

There was a shout. Jake jerked his head up, unsure of where the noise came from then --

The dragon lurched and a spout of fire catapulted towards the . Jake yelped, jumping in the opposite direction. From deeper in the cave, Howl Pendragon ran towards them, arms outstretched, but the dragon shruddred and Howl collapsed on a pile of coins as a cloud of smoke enveloped them both.

Jake coughed, eyes straining to see through the smoke.

“Howl! Uh -- Dragon?!”

From the smoke emerged -- holy fuck was that Mel?! She was the dragon?!  She was holding the beating heart in her hand?! She was okay!  She was--naked.

Oh god she was naked.

Jake shifted immediately back into his human form (clothed) and covered his eyes.

“He’s behind you!” said Jake, fingers clamped. He reached out his other hand to point in the general direction, to Howl who was passed out on the ground, one arm dramatically thrown over his head, his golden hair spilling across the golden coins (Jake, of course, did not see all of this as he was very much not looking at Naked Melaenis).

“I think he heard the, uh, commotion and ran out after you but then, uh, I dunno he just sorta fainted I guess?!”

MELAENIS:

Melaenis moved, stumbling toward Howl’s collapsed body. And as she went, step by uneven step, as though she was relearning how to use her legs, the poem trickled back in…

...Go and catch a falling star…

Oh, but she had something so much better than a star cradled in the palms of her hand.

She knew what she had to do. It was as though no time had passed between now and that March midnight so long ago, when she’d first pulled this star from Calcifer’s embers. She blinked and saw Howl’s home and its floorboards and the runes she’d scrawled. The candles, the silly bookshoppe girl in the corner, Howl tied to the chair, unaware that he was but a pawn in a much bigger game than he could ever imagine.

And above all else, she remembered the heart. How it beat, how it sang, how it called to her. How the dragon roared in response.

Could she do it now? What had changed between then and today? Nothing, Mel knew. She arrived at Howl’s side, kneeling down with her knees pressing crescents into the dirt, and the dragon still lived inside of her. There was no fire demon or contract to break for Melaenis. It still hungered. Mel hungered. She paused over his body, holding his heart, and she still wanted it.

Gazing down at Howl’s sleeping face, he was beautiful just like this. Could he not stay like this-- a sleeping beauty, hidden in a witch’s cave?

Mel’s eyes softened and she tilted her head to the side like a bird, inspecting its egg. Gently, she removed some hair from his face.

The dragon burned and salivated, wrestling for control again. No-- that was not the dragon at all, but her own hunger. It was not a hunger for blood or for flesh.

Things would be different, when Melaenis’s sleeping beauty awoke.

No where / Lives a woman true, and fair, went the spell cast so long ago: a prophecy true. And the prophecy had spoken right if Mel was supposed to be the prophesied woman. She’d doubted herself the last time, but now in the damp cavelight, covered in soot, she realized it was always supposed to be this way. Howl had found his deceitful woman, and she had betrayed him as the poem had said, just as she betrayed her master before him, and her father before that. It was only Melaenis who was wicked enough to hold a heart wrapped in wicked magic this long-- and live.

“Let’s see if the rest of it is true, my darling,” she whispered to Howl and Howl alone. And very gently, she pressed the heart into Howl’s chest.

Blood spilled-- blood, and then bright, otherworldly fire. Mel felt the heat of it, but she felt the beating of the heart much longer, even after the flames had died and there was no more heart.

Still, it beat-- it beat, for it was in Howl’s chest. Mel’s fingers spread over Howl’s skin, and she marveled at the sound, the beating stronger and stronger until, at last, Howl opened his eyes.

HOWL:

He gasped.

The first thing Howl noticed was how his chest ached. His torso had never felt like that before, all raw and aching and tender and heavy. It was almost suffocating, clawing at his rib cage, expanding outwards, stabbing him in the side.

A throaty groan escaped his lips. His eyes fluttered open, though everything was a blur

The second thing Howl noticed was the sound. A thump, thump, thump, de-thump. It was in his ears. In his throat. In his chest. In his fingertips. It echoed in his brain. Thump-thump-thump-de-thup. He wanted it to stop. He was not used to it. He wanted it out.

His vision grew clearer. He could make out a figure, peering down at him.

The third thing Howl noticed was Melaenis.

Mel -- his Mel, not the dragon, not the creature of blood and fire who had burst through on that March night so long ago. His Mel, naked and standing over him, her brows knit together, ash over her face -- just like the first moment they’d met.

“Mel,” he croaked, then slapped a hand over his heart. “What the dickens -- what --”

He sat up as much as he could, reaching for her, cupping a hand under her chin, and the heaviness, the thump-de-thump, he realized what was going on and --

“Calcifer!” he cried, snapping his head, trying to scan for the fire demon.

There was a whoop, an exclamation of excitement, and a orange burst of flame catapulted through the cave and landed right between Howl and Mel, sparks flying everywhere. Neither of them was singed though and Calcifer’s flames grew and grew, engulfing the two sorcerers.

“You did it!” said Cal. “And I’m still here -- do you know how flippin’ rare that is?!”

“An old wives’ tale,” said Howl, “says that every so often, when a demon bond is broken, the demon can still stay around.” He pressed a hand to his heart, marveling at how it felt, how heavy it was in his chest.

He looked at Mel now, and that heaviness in his chest turned to lightness and it was such a lightness he’d never felt, almost as if his heart was going to inflate like a balloon and take him far away from here. He let out a suprised laugh, then leaned forward (Calcifer between them), kissing Melaenis on the mouth.

“Uh, sorry to interrupt,” said a voice, and Howl lifted his head slightly to see the Dragon boy a few meters away. “I guess everythings -- we did it?! I mean you did it!”

“Mel did it,” said Howl, flashing a smile. “And now -- dear God, I need to take a long bath.”

[baelllamyblake]

Brainwashed by Love ( Bellamy Blake x reader )

Requested : me LOL

Warnings : Gore, abusive words?, curse words, angst, mentions of sex

Pairings : Bellamy x Reader

Word Count : 1,914

A/N: HOO BOY I can not wait for the writers’ block after this one. I basically just took the whole Alie taking over Raven sequence and replaced Raven with Y/N. Maybe a lil slow? I don’t know? At least it’s long lmao. I've seriously got a problem i have nothing else to do but write fanfics for bellamy help me pls

FEEDBACK IS GREATLY APPRECIATED SO PLEASE FUCK ME UP WITH IT <3

You were emotionally vulnerable and heartbroken but you didn’t think taking the chip would change the course of your life forever. The vicious dispute about the grounder massace between your boyfriend Bellamy and you left you in painful tears, struggling to find a way to relieve the angry build up in your chest. It left Bellamy trying to fix his guilty conscience by crawling on top of another girl in bed.

“ Hey, Bellamy.. I wanted to apolo- “ you said sincerely, swiping open the tent flap. You stopped dead in your tracks, frozen like ice. Bellamy was naked, interlaced with a girl that wasn’t you. The girl squeaked quietly before rushing to scoop up her belonging and get the fuck out of the tent. The severity of the situation intensified as Bellamy cleared his throat and rose to his full height, staying silent and averting his gaze from yours.

Your chest tightened and your breathing became shallow and quick. Your heart was breaking before Bellamy in a matter of seconds. He desperately wanted to embrace you and apologize profusely but knew that you would shove him away instantly. Tears streamed from your eyes and refused to stop falling. “ I didn’t think you could sink any lower, Bellamy but you always manage to surprise me. “ you choked out, stifling a cry before turning on your heel and storming out. Bellamy slapped the sides of his head, cursing himself for pushing away the only person that genuinely cared for him.

You briskly walked to the Ark and demanded Jaha give you whatever he was feeding to his ever-growing cult. He was hesitant to place the blue chip in your hand. “ We need Y/N. Once she takes the chip, the others will follow. “ Alie said, observing your heaving chest and puffy, red eyes. Jaha nodded in agreement and placed the chip in your hand. You glupped it down, the pain fading away instantaneously and a smile curling on your face.

“ Time to get to work, Y/N. “ Alie spoke, an empty smile on her digital face. You nodded in agreement, tears ceasing to fall instantly. You couldn’t even remember why you took the chip, but you knew everything was okay in the City of Light.

The heartache was gone, the pain ceased to exist, and you no longer cried yourself to sleep every night that Bellamy never returned from the tent. The false comfort of the City of Light put your heart to ease and every bad memory ceased to exist. Word spread around camp that you took the chip and Bellamy began to fall apart at the seams. Bellamy couldn’t believe he drove you to take the chip, he lost you completely.

While Bellamy was breaking down little by little every day, you were playing pawn for Alie. You hacked into mainframe after mainframe, looking for Alie 2.0. You thought nothing of it, you were willing to do anything for the City of Light. It wasn’t until retrieving the chip maker that Jasper who was accompanying you made you realize that was something was missing. You couldn’t even recall anything of Bellamy: his face, his voice, and none of the memories shared between you.

You tried everything in your power to force Alie out of your brain. She was everywhere you were, she saw everything you saw, and she heard everything you heard. Alie managed to break your rebellious spirit by removing the mind blockade and every painful memory flooded in every crevice and crack of your mind. You shrieked in pain, sweat beading at your hairline, writhing from left to right in a hospital bed.

Abby struggled to help relieve the pain while Alie coaxed you into giving in, promising that all of your suffering will end.

The last thing you could remember was accepting Alie’s offer and the world faded to black. Jasper stood by your side until you awoke. You woke up quietly as if you were awaken by daylight. “ Woah, Y/N. Are you okay? Take it easy. “ Jasper shot up from his seat, pushing you down from your biceps. You noticed your forearms were bandages but you didn’t know what. Jasper watched you examine your wrists with concerned eyes.

“ I’m sorry for lashing out like that, Jasper. Thanks for helping me. “ you said casually, looking to Jasper with a smile on your face. Jasper narrowed his eyebrows slightly, put off the fact that you were begging to get Alie out of you. “ No problem, Y/N. I’m always here for you. “ Jasper said, returning a fake smile before injecting a reaper stick in your neck.

You woke up, taking in a large gasp of air. You were in the back of an idle vehicle, voices immediately stopped speaking once they heard you came too. “ You need to get out and identify your location, now. “ Alie said, sitting on the bench to your left. You hopped up with vigor, quickly unlatching the door and running out into the dark night. “ I can’t see anything! It’s nothing but forest! “ you yelled, furiously turning around yourself, Alie standing behind you with a tilted head. Clarke and Jasper scrambled to subdue you, holding you down and injecting you with another reaper stick dose.

Clarke and Jasper drove and dragged you into Niylah’s house, fastening your wrists to a bedframe to keep you from escaping. Bellamy watched from behind them, guilty that he made you turn out like this. Jasper decided to take first watch over you. You woke up with a groan, taking a look at your surroundings. “ Where am I? “ you asked, Jasper fiddling with a knick-knack on the table. “ Somewhere safe. “ Jasper answered with a sigh, not bothering to look at you. You started to fiddle with the fabric restraints.

“ Hey! Y/N, stop that! Clarke, get in here! “ Jasper yelled, panicking that you managed to dislocate your shoulder and rip open a wound. Clarke rushed in, eyes growing wide at the sight of you. “ Alie! If you let Y/N, you’ll never get Alie 2.0. “ Clarke yelled, grabbing the attention of you and Alie. Clarke held in her fingers the superior version of Alie. You instantly complied and stopped resisting, allowing Clarke to pop your shoulder back in its place and to bandage your wrist again.

“ Thanks, Clarke. I wonder about something. Do you ever see faces of those you’ve killed? You know, like Wells, Finn, Jake Griffin, and Lexa?, “ you asked in a cheerful yet devious tone. Clarke did her best to brush off what you had said. “ I just wanted to say that I think those deaths were completely your fault. “ you said bluntly, Clarke furrowed her eyebrows in anger. “ Shut the hell up, Alie, “ Clarke demanded firmly, you bit her on the wrist and drew blood. “ Fuck you, Alie! I can’t wait to get you out of Y/N. We’re going to fry you, bitch! “ Clarke yelled furiously, Bellamy rushed in to restrain her and drag her out. “ They’re going to use an EMP. Nice job, Y/N. Keep working at them. “ Alie said, deep in thought before disappearing from your vision.

Bellamy and Jasper stepped in to cover Clarke’s shift. They stepped warily around you, anxious of what you had to say next. They both sat at the same table, keeping their gaze strictly on you. Bellamy kept his eyes fixed on your face, the blood running down your face contrasted brightly against your (S/C) skin. Bellamy felt guilty yet again for doing this to you.

“ Hey, Jasper. How does it feel to live in the shadow of your best friend? How does it feel to be the burden of the group? How does it feel to have to be constantly saved by your friends? “ You asked quizzically, tilting your head. Jasper grew uncomfortable, teeth grinding and foot tapping against the dirt floor. Bellamy noticed your manipulative game and sent Jasper out to spare him from you. You bore your eyes in Bellamy who was looking off in a different direction, deep in thought.

“ Hey, Bellamy, doesn’t it annoy you that you didn’t the credit you deserve for killing everyone in Mount Weather?, “ you asked with crooked intention. Bellamy didn’t even acknowledge what you said, much less your presence. “ I mean, it’s quiet a shame really. The deaths are on your head as well. Too bad you’re not a natural born leader like Clarke is. She’s back one day and you’re already following her around like a lost puppy dog, maybe you like her more than me. Maybe you want to fuck her as well. It doesn’t matter anyway because you’ve already asserted your authority by massacring 300 grounders who just wanted to help out. “ you said flatly, eyes burning with a secret rage. You wanted to break Bellamy further than he already is. Bellamy clenched his jaw and fist silently, trying his hardest not to lash out at you. He knew that you weren’t yourself, you would never say anything like that.

Niylah barged in, screaming, crying and cursing in your face, saying that everything was your fault. Bellamy shoved her out, worried because you knew where you were currently being hid. “ You’re fucked. “ you said with a devilish smile, letting out a laugh. Bellamy shook his head and left, demanding everyone find a way to get Alie out of you.

Everyone scurried to create an EMP device, leaving to gather parts. They rushed into your room in the middle of you trying to commit suicide, proposed by Alie. Jasper and Bellamy inhibit from you doing so while Sinclair set up the EMP device in front of you. “ No, please, Sinclair! I’ll get brain damage if you use that! “ you screamed, crying and resisting against Bellamy and Jasper. The group used it anyway, your body slumped and you were unconcious. Bellamy finally touched your face after time apart. Thank God, you were breathing.

Bellamy thought about what he was going to say once you woke up. Clarke extracted the chip from the nape of your neck with master skill. You woke up with a groan, fingers shooting up to the pain on the back of your neck. Everyone waited with bated breath, were you going to feel pain or was the effort rendered useless? “ Ouch, this hurts. “ you said, wincing as you ran your fingers along the stitches. The group let out a big sigh and a couple cheers. Bellamy held your hand tightly and you looked up to him with a sweet smile on your face.

“ Thanks, sweetheart. I’m sorry for what I said to you. “ you said, bringing his hand to your face to peck a small, weak kiss. Bellamy breathed a small chuckle, moving the hair off your forehead. “ I’m so sorry for what I did to you, Y/N. You wouldn’t have been in this position if I wasn’t such a stupid idiot. “ Bellamy apologized, pouring his heart into his words. You accepted his apology with a sweet smile before pulling at his clothes so he would hop into bed with you. You fell asleep soundly in his arms, Bellamy kissed the top of your head and pulled you in close. 

He fell asleep for the first time in weeks.

[kenjkats]

HEYY because I have no self-restraint JakeXMC for numbers 1-23, 38, And 41? THANKS LOVE!!♥️

YOOOO ES3 ON THE HORIZON I AM HYPED FOR MY MANS JAKE THANKS FOR THE ASK

LOL I GET IT THO it’s JAKE. MCKENZIE. Who has the restraint???

Note: Using F!MC and default name Taylor. And these get specific so I might use personality/backstory HCs especially for MC

1. How do they fall asleep? Wake up? Any daily rituals?

They’re quite cuddly. Even if they didn’t go to sleep in each other’s arms they often wake up to find that Taylor is resting against Jake’s shoulder and he has that arm wrapped around her. Waking up varies, either very lazy mornings filled with groaning and “five more minutes”, one of them stretching and smacking the other in the face. Or, groping each other half asleep that devolves into sex. I don’t make the rules.

2. How’s their team work? Do they share well?

GREAT. They got through a bunch of hellish life and death situations on La Huerta, their daily team work is a piece of cake. Although they argue over whose turn it is to do a certain chore.

3. Are they open about their relationship? How do they feel about public displays of affection?

VERY OPEN. Jake McKenzie doesn’t give A F*CK. If he wants to kiss Taylor, he’s gonna kiss Taylor. And she doesn’t mind at alllll. A big lesson from the island is you gotta live in the here and now and say you love the ones you love when you can. Everyone hates them a little for it. Lots of eye rolling and groaning and, “Seriously? Do you have to do that HERE?”

4. First impression of each other? Was it love at first sight?

Not love, but they were attracted to each other right away. Taylor saw this pilot sleeping in the cockpit with his feet up and thought he was lazy, snarky, but cute. Jake definitely noticed her when he laid eyes on her, masking it with jokes and nicknames, of course.

5. Nicknames? Pet names? Any in-jokes?

6. Any tasks that are always left to one person?

They kinda settled into the routine of Taylor cooking and Jake doing dishes. Some sort of similar agreement goes for most of their other chores.

7. What annoys them the most about their partner? Would they change it if they could?

They love each other’s little quirks, but what annoys them both is that the other has the tendency to cut the other off for their sake. Taylor not telling Jake or the gang about some dangers (that she could talk about without messing up time) just to protect them. Jake trying to make her go when Lundgren was after them. Stuff like that. They wish the other would let them just be there for them cause they’re supposed to be a team, but the need to protect the other gets in the way.

8. What do they like best about their partner?

Taylor loves Jake’s hair (she runs her fingers through it a lot because it’s surprisingly soft), and the smirk he gives her a lot. Let’s not forget the beautiful blue eyes that like to wander over her body.

Jake loves her smile. He tries to hide it most of the time, but it makes him melt. And the way she smells. When they’re lying next to each other at the end of the day and he takes in her scent he feels happy and safe, because to him she smells like home.

9. Do they discuss big issues? Religion? Marriage? Children? Death?

Yes but they’re both a little awkward about it and there’s a lot of beating around the bush. But they eventually do, especially when a situation forces them to. Jake makes sure to insert a lot of jokes and puns to deflect the awkwardness of any conflicting opinions. Although they surprise each other with their very similar views anyway.

10. Who drives? Cooks? Does the handiwork? Cleans? Pays the bills? Handles the public?

Taylor drives. Jake actually only knows how to work planes. Go figure. Taylor cooks most of the time except for when Jake is in the mood to barbecue or grill things outside. Jake does a lot of the handiwork around the house. Cleaning is split, with they heavy-duty outdoor stuff taken care by Jake (he likes it because you do those less often than say, sweeping lol). Taylor pays the bills. They hate the public XD

11. Do they celebrate holidays? Anniversaries?

They do! They usually have a thing with the gang then sneak off to have some private time drinking together, lying in a hammock cuddling, or… things.

Their favorites are New Years and their anniversary. Add to that the anniversary of Jake’s name being cleared, letting him move back to the states so they can live together.

They also celebrate the anniversary of when they all returned home. It’s a special holiday only they celebrate. Lots of feels and good times on that day.

12. Is there a wedding? What was the proposal like? Any kind of honeymoon?

THERE IS. It was on the island. Their relationship never went along the normal progression anyway. Everything just happened quickly. Jake proposed one day after all the mess on La Huerta. They were still on the island, but everything was more lax. They could afford to party, relax, and figure out how to get home in peace.

Jake and Taylor were sitting quietly on the beach, talking about how great it felt to be free from all the weird stuff. And Jake is staring at her as she talks about home. He never thought about getting married, but he wasn’t stupid, either. He saw very clearly how lucky he was, how he wanted her and only her, and just asked then and there. Why wait?

It was a lovely little ceremony officiated by the Vaanti, with a feast of course and Raj getting everyone drunk. They saved the honeymoon for when they got back home, and had it on a regular island getaway without time magic nonsense.

13. What do they do for fun? Do they have a favorite activity or do they like to switch things up?

They’re very chill. They like to lay around the house, or go for walks and hikes outside. Occasionally they do go for an adrenaline rush: surfing, jetskiing, diving, Jake flying them around, that kind of stuff.

14. Anything they both dread?

An angry Michelle, Zahra, Estela, and worst of all Grace lol

They can handle anything else, really.

15. How adventurous are they?

Very. They’re that type of couple that likes to go on mountain hikes and would try anything that gave you a big adrenaline rush.

16. Do they keep secrets? Lie? Cheat?

Nope. By the time they get back from La Huerta they’re pretty much open to each other all the way. There are times though when they feel the need to hide something from the other when they feel like it would keep the other safer or it was unnecessary to worry them about it, but these things usually come out if they need to.

17. What would make them break up? Would it be permanent?

If they can’t keep up with adjustments in each other’s lives. I mean Taylor would be adjusting to the new life of being an adult: finding a job, getting used to paying bills, and figuring out what she wants to do with her life. Jake on the other hand has to get used to being back in the states, and could have trouble adjusting into the quiet normalcy of everyday life. 

I could see Taylor hang on even if they had trouble keeping up with each other on top of these life changes, but Jake would be the type of guy who might ask to cool off if he feels like he’s being a burden or hindrance in her new life.

Probably not permanent. Taylor is stubborn and would keep coming back.

18. What are their dates like? How long do/did they date? Do they ever feel the need to take a break from each other?

They feel a little awkward at first readjusting to life back in the normal world and going on actual dates that didn’t involve simultaneously running away from prehistoric predators. But when they do adjust, they hang out a lot. 

Jake shows her around his hometown, and they like to take little trips together and he shows her all the places he’s been with his old plane Delilah. They like going to bars together, or camping, or just hanging out at one of their houses or in the backyard, lounging around, talking, and drinking or eating. When they get a little bored of the quiet, they like to go hiking, or to the beach and do fun activities like jetski races ofc.

I HC that Taylor doesn’t really have a home in the US like she thinks, so when they go back they move in together right away. They maybe date for about a year before Jake cuts the BS and asks her to marry him lol. They were never the couple to take things slow anyway. They were sure of each other from the start.

Ofc they need breaks from each other. Everyone needs alone time. Taylor likes to go out with the girls: Michelle and Estela especially, while Jake likes to have alone time in his hammock or watch a game with Craig, Zahra, and Sean.

19. What do they fight about? What are their arguments like? How do they make up?

They fought quite a bit when they were adjusting to a normal life and living together. Not having to worry about surviving attacks and starvation lets you notice the annoying things a little more. They argue about bad habits and chores, but nothing too big. Their arguments are just a few annoyed words, then one of them, usually Jake, walks off before they lose their temper and say something they don’t mean.

They make up by just approaching the other and hugging them, mumbling an apology. Always a lot of make up kissing/sex lol

20. What does their home look like? Their room?

Simple, but homey. These two could live on a shack on the beach and decorate it with a bunch of souvenirs from their travels, which is basically how they decorate their actual home. Nothing fancy. Same with their room.

21. Do they share any interests or hobbies?

Yes! I imagine they love watching sports and support Sean in his career. They also love outdoors-y type activities. Jake shares his enthusiasm for flying, and tries teach Taylor how to fly his new little plane. Taylor introduces Jake to a bunch of her favorite TV series.

22. Does their work ever interfere with the relationship?

In the way of time maybe. They feel frustrated when they’re trying to get into a routine. Taylor is a fresh grad trying to settle into her first job and she’s kept busy quite a lot. Jake on the other hand doesn’t have too many options after serving his country. He goes back to being a pilot and is away a lot.

23. How do they hug? Kiss? Tease? Flirt? Comfort?

Jake often does the side hug, draping one arm around Taylor to pull her in then kiss her on the forehead. Taylor likes wrapping her arms around his waist when he does this and buries her face in his chest.

Their kissing always leads to things. They can’t help it, they enjoy the feel of each other too much and if they are alone, they will take advantage lol.

Flirting is shameless. Doesn’t matter when or where, even in serious life and death planning mode with the gang, Jake especially will find a way to pull out a flirty joke or pull her into a kiss. You miss all the shots you don’t take, is one of his life mottos.

They comfort each other with light-hearted jokes, words, and light touches or lingering hugs. Like when Taylor found Jake’s idol. She hugs him for comfort and he returns it, asking her what’s wrong and reassuring her. Or like in the tent before they went after Rourke and Jake poured his heart out to her about Mike. She was there for him and reassured him, making sure he knew she was there for him.

38. What are they like in the bedroom? Any kinks/fetishes/turn-ons? Anything they won’t do?

Insatiable, really. They just go at it whenever they can and wherever they can, you saw them on La Huerta lol EVEN IN THE CAVE XDD

So they’re really hungry and rough about it, especially in the beginning, but then they also have that side where they’re softer, slower, and are more gentle - usually in quieter moments and later on when they fall hard for each other.

They won’t do anything too crazy, but they do like to mix it up now and then (cough tying each other up is canon cough). Hmm stuff with food, blindfolding, doing it in non-bed places, stuff like that. Jake loves LOVES watching her though, it’s a simple thing is a huge turn on for him. Like he’ll watch her as she moves on against him or he rocks against her, drinking in the way her face looks, how her hair is splayed over the sheets - all of it. Drives him crazy.

41. Are they party-goers? What are they like when they’re drunk? Does it happen often?

Yes but in that relaxed way. Like, they’ll go to a party, but are the ones sitting around and just drinking in their own little group. Jake isn’t drunk too often. The man’s threshold is HIGH. But when he is, he gets kind of sleepy and is extra touchy with Taylor. He also either laughs more or gets a little miffed with people around him who make fun of him cause he looks so drunk. Like Craig will crack a joke and Jake tries to push him a little, but he misses and just ends up sitting on the floor. Idk XDD

Taylor is drunk more often. She tries to drink the same stuff Jake does, but usually can’t keep up. She’s a happy drunk, prone to dancing, yelling, and lots of giggling around her friends. She’ll also drape her arms around Jake a lot, kissing him all over his cheek and ruffling his hair, still giggling.

Send me a ship and some numbers and I’ll give you HCs (limited, see this link for ships I do!)