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thetownwecallhome · 2 years ago

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TNBC Shower Thought-cloud #5: Sally the Ragdoll

((OOC:

So the sequel book to Nightmare Before Christmas All Hail the Pumpkin Queen, came out this last year and I just gotta make my stance clear now: if you like that book, cool.

I don't. Like, I really don't. To make a long story short, Shea Anshaw's take on Jack and Sally finally getting married ft the revelations that

Sally wasn't actually made by Dr. Finkelstein

Sally is a princess from another world

Sally wax poetic abt awesome girl-boss royalty ((like, human royalty, the kind that commits genocide and apartheid)) being legit and cool and how you shouldn't question it

This newest girl-bossification of Sally is positing the same question the TNBC-critical sphere has been asking for years: is Sally from Nightmare Before Christmas dependent and therefore can't be a good feminist character?

The hyperbole take on her being " her [Sally's] entire purpose is being supportive of Jack, who isn't supportive of her and who doesn't deserve her as a girlfriend "

This isn't a fringe opinion nor is it held only by people I dislike. Lindsay Ellis jokingly told Sally to "get her bachelor's degree" in one of her vids which I am very obviously not butthurt at all by as you can tell, while Hasani Walker made a webcomic where that functionally happens; Sally and Jack break up to work things out individually before they really try it out as a couple.

Just so we're clear, my disagreeing with these two and other creators is NOT meant to be war on people who don't ship SallyxJack, nor is it a roast on people who are critical of Sally/TNBC as a principle.

BUT, when it comes to Sally ((in the film, not the games or spin offs, the film)) being a doormat of a woman who's too good for her man...I disagree.

---First thing's first, My take on Sally is highly influenced by The Nightmare Before Christmas : The Film, the Art, and the Vision which my sister bought years ago. In that book, Carolyn Thompson said this -

While TNBC is the story of the time Jack did a thing and ruined it for everyone, it's Sally who embodies everything the filmmakers want the audience to feel about Jack.

Set up and seen before Jack is even on screen, Sally is a part of the world of Halloween, but also an outsider in it. This gives her the position to see Jack the way the audience does; Just like Sally, we are awed and enamored with Jack when he first pops up, then saddened and sympathetic for him once we realize his plight. Though she's absent from Jack's finding of Christmas Town, she IS there for the town meeting when we the audience (and her) are gushing over his gushing over Christmas. We sense along with Sally Jack's frustration with the town citizens, are saddened to see him pander to them, and can tell he’s not well when committing to his Xmas experiments. Most important of all, Sally recognizes Jack’s Xmas takeover as wrong and wants to stop it, even if she love him. Even without hearing him sing “I bet I could IMPROVE IT TOO” like we do, Sally knows Jack is wrong. Regardless of her care for Jack, visibly, she’s the only one who sees what’s happening with Santa is wrong. Sally tracks him down in order to help Jack, but she’s none the less Santa’s real ally. From everything we know about her, Sally, like the rest of Halloween Town, is not a mean monster and doesn’t like to spread misery ala Oogie Boogie, and she’s not too hopped up on enthusiasm to forget when she’s hurting people like Jack and the town very much are. Sally is the og critical stan. now join me for a tanget-

Interestingly, any other holiday film ((Year without a Santa Claus, Hocus Pocus, Hop)) would make the voice-of-reason audience-surrogate character a peppy human child who's interacting w the holiday characters, but in TNBC, the writers made the surrogate someone who's also a holiday character- Sally. Sally is kind of to TNBC what Nick Calloway is to The Great Gatsby. Yeah, that's a stretch-Nick is of course the narrator and author-stand in for his story where Sally isn't (although, a TNBC narrated by Sally sounds dope as hell, ngl), tho more importantly, while Nick learns along with the reader how cruel and fruitless the American dream Jay believed in actually was,

---Sally is a character who doesn’t have to learn anything. tanget- again

A lot of people have this opinion on Disney heroines like Belle or Ariel, that good characters, female or otherwise, don't necessarily have to learn anything. I could take or leave Belle and Ariel in as far as if they should learn a lesson in their movies. But in my eyes, that character will always be Sally. Sally is a character you wanna aspire to be like and who doesn’t need to learn the lesson of the story. And yes, Sally is also in-love with Jack. You can be extra cynicalsassy and use this to say "TNBC was made to make you feel like you could make out w Jack Skellington" (( I'd like to point out that Nick is all but canonically in love with Jay in GG)) but that's not the point. More importantly...how/why is that a bad thing that Sally is in love? TNBC doesn’t pass any bectal tests. If women always supporting other women is the only mark of feminism ever then I guess, but I mean, what’s wrong if a woman’s inspo and motivation is a man? What’s especially wrong if she’s self aware and tries to battle that man’s influence within the story. How is that "putting up with" or "enabling/excusing/thinking only of Jack". Sally...really doesn't do that...

---Sally has wants, but within the narrative of Nightmare she's just a bit taken back by needs. At the start of the movie what Sally wants, and the reason she says "I know how you feel" to Jack, is to be active.

“I don’t want to BE patient”

“I’m restless, I can’t help it!”

Sally wants to be anything but Finkelstein's cute assistant because SHE knows she's more than that. She wants to be a part of Halloween Town. What's keeping her back is her reluctance to be free, which she finally throws to the wind after seeing Jack's tower from afar, which is why she's so happy throwing herself out the window - that's her 'let it go' moment of actually taking action in her life. The man she loves is evidently doing it -why shouldn't she? Her actual 'need' is to escape from Dr. Finkelste and it’s really not an obstacle, if we're being honest. The balls are all in her court; Fink's at most an irritation to her. She literally came back to his lab just to be sewn up and smile in his face about poisoning him. She can, and does, so often easily escape because she’s NOT perturbed by him. Sally is, at this point in the film, totally in control of her wants and her needs. But then- the plot kicks in and she has her vision. It's then that her real need in the story, the need she recognizes, outweighs her wants, that need being: "omg I gotta stop this undead himbo from hurting himself and other people!" Sally’s #1 goal in the film is NOT to be Jack's gf, it’s just to save him from himself. Jack inspires her, makes her feel good, but she doesn’t let that stop her from seeing things for how they are ABOUT him. Her words in "Sally Song" never read to me as "notice me senpai I wish I was good ENOUGH" self-loathing. If anything her succumbing to “it’s never to become '' about Jack isn’t some “I love you even though you’ll NEVER luff MEEEEE” devotion, but forlorn frustration. “I think it’s not to be '' = Jack’s never gonna change”. It's Sally's lament about how she doesn't believe Jack will ever want her that way because she just knows what kind of person he is*. But that's not the only thing she sings about in this song. Sally has been apart from the crowd and wants to be a part of it, but any joy she’d have in her new independence is kinda sucked up by knowing Jack is gonna get him and possibly the rest of the town killed. She even wonders in her song if she wants to or ever can be really a part of Halloween Town when she clearly can’t do the hype-Jack-up song and dance like the rest of them. Jack evidently treats her like an equal part of the team, but 1) for Jack that's just another citizen he thinks doesn't understand him, and 2) it's participation in a project she knows she doesn't want to be a part of. Real monkey's paw there, Sally!

If there is anything close enough to a lesson for Sally in the film, arguably, it’d be not to underestimate Jack as unable to change. She’s not only validated by the end of the film, she gets to see Jack really bounce back and be the person she loved at the start- and then is taken aback that he not only does this but finally recognizes her affections, her efforts, and her as a person. final tangent:

((I think the make-or-break-you point with Nightmare is a question of whether or not you think Jack learned his lesson. While I think the filmmakers could have really handled that better, especially in “Poor Jack”, I think what they were going for in their own crunch of an ending is Jack falling in love with Sally is his redemption- he finally came around to seeing her and her way. The Film, the Art, and the Vision makes a point of how Sally is far more than Jack’s romantic interest. ))

Being Mr. Cynical again, you could handwave this as just a throw-in from the writers; "actually she IS REALLY important lookit all the things she do!" but I believe in that statement because they believe in that.

--Sally's MO is centered around Jack. Narratively, yes, she exists in compandum to him. But, within the actual story of the film, Jack isn't her soul purpose in life. The fact that she tries to stop him is proof enough of that.

The argument that Sally is too good and better than the relationship she's in falls apart because Jack and Sally aren't IN a relationship in the film. They hook up at the end -that's not the same as them being together or a couple. The logic of this take is, again, confusing Sally's wants with her needs, and also presuming Jack always loved her and just didn't realize until the end of the story, which is NOT the text of the actual film, that's fan speculation. (( I prefer Jack falling in love with Sally on the spot out of nowhere. It's such a Jack way of doing things...)) I think what convinces people that Sally is “dependent” on Jack or only ever his side-kick is how expanded media treats her as character, as well as her relationship w Jack. In the 2000s, all that mattered for making spin off material of kid’s franchises is keeping the cast recognizable and that means undoing their development if the point of the story is that they change. It happened in every Land Before Time sequel where Cera and Littlefoot have to be the respective team-racist and team-leader, always, ever, all the time; it happened in the Finding Nemo comics set after the movie where writers still made Marlin overprotective of Nemo; it happened to Jack in Kingdom Hearts and Oogie’s Revenge. The writers may want to write an actual story, but it’s easier to just write what the characters are like in the original. SO, Jack HAS to be an oblivious, selfish manchild and can never learn and is also really despondent and prone to abandoning ppl he supposedly cares about. This sucks enough for Jack's character, but I think Sally suffered even worse than him. At that time, media and merch did treat Sally like she was JUST Jack’s love interest. Literally in Oogie’s Revenge's game pamphlet the only disc for her is “she’s sewn her way into Jack’s heart”, like she’s just his side piece and not the woman he ended his movie with who was also a really important character you followed within that movie. We can only repeat what we know from the film so oop!-Jewel’s MIA and Sally has to live with her sexist ex/boss who doesn't even like her.

---While we're here, I'm 100% sure Sally and Dr. Fink’s relationship is not familial. Some fictional mad scientists do love their creations like they were their children (see also: Mad Monster Party, 9, Frankenweenie for animated examples). Not Dr. Fink. While not exactly predatory ((because it's a fricken kids film, ew)) Dr Finkelstein is a sexist old man. He's problematic. Fink made Sally to be his sexy secretary. He's mad because her life doesn’t revolve around him the way he thinks a woman who works for him life should. In the end, he just decided to go and make a copy of himself since he knows now what he wants is to be told how awesome he is. I really don’t vibe some fic authors (and Shea Anshaw's) insistence that they be anything like ‘family’, hence why I made fun of it on this blog.

For all I disagree with between our headcanons, I much prefer Hasani Walker's take on Sally to Long Live the Pumpkin Queen. Hasani went in w good vibes; he made decent takes and criticisms; he made some good art; he did a sweet crossover between stop-motion properties, and MOST importantly, Hasani gave Sally a hat and a cool girl vest. Did Shea Anshaw do that? No!

It feels very at home and on-brand for TNBC that Sally was made from whole cloth as a ragdoll, but is still her own autonomous person by the rest of town and even the leader eventually. Reminds me a lot of the Oz books where the Scarecrow, Jack Pumpkinhead, and Gump are all just possessions but who are seen as people by the heroes, and even made official citizens by the heroes, which they are. What's more Halloweeny than a living-ragdoll-frankenstein woman being co-ruler of everything spoopy, or even just a citizen loved and respected as much as the rest of the town for her own attributes? If that's what you want, and it's what Hasani actually did for her, than give her that. Outside of her purpose within the story that I already mentioned earlier... what about Sally is sexist? So TNBC doesn't pass the bechdel test and Sally's main inspo happens to be her man. Not her soul purpose like in mother!, just her muse, her kin, her dearest friend. Secret of NIMH and Kubo and the Two Strings have female characters whose motives are their men and those characters don't even have first names. I kinda really hate the implication that a woman can't have a male character as a motive ever or else. As a feminist, I agree, women characters should be individuals and not props for the men. The problem to me isn't so much the insistence that a woman be there for support, it's writers crafting a story where certain characters fill more of a role or purpose in cunjunction to another, and when the writer happens to make said character a woman.

Also, since the whole point of LLTPQ was to give Sally her own agency and importance...how is it fair that she HAVE to be a royalty HERSELF in order to be her own person?

Is it because she was made to be a sexy nurse and that's somehow wrong or shameful even though the whole point is it's not her fault? Is it that people would accuse her of “leeching off" Jack just for being in a relationship with him? You know? The thing bad, sexist people do to women and sax workers irl if they have famous boos when they themselves aren't famous? If the only people complaining are those who think Sally is JUST Jack’s sidepiece, why validate those people? Wanting her to have agency within the movie and so giving her different choices as opposed to just INSTANTLY marrying Jack? That's a take I can vibe with because that is true to the nature of what Sally is, which is not just the Mad Scientist's beautiful assistant. By making Sally a "princess all along '', you imply that her even possibly starting from the bottom makes her beneath Jack and she has to rise to be his equal. Sally never had to do this in the original movie. Sally really was the smartest, most in tune person in town.

I talk a big game, of course, but even as my fav character I know I've done Sally wrong too. The "Mothball" comic is one of my biggest regrets from this blog. It's SO badly worded and I think it's a comic that REALLY needed a second opinion. Sally did nothing wrong in that comic, but both it and Jack made her feel like they were both in the wrong. Trying to give Jack and Sally a conflict as a couple was hard and I ended up rehashing some really harmful language, which I didn't want to do for either Sally or Jack. Don't like that comic. My first choice of retype, redraft.

final thoughts?

What people (me, Lindsay, Hasani, Shea, errybody) actually want of Sally is to have her own agency and 'character' apart from Jack. While narratively, yes, Sally functions as being there to endear Jack to the audience, my point is as a character within the narrative-Sally does have her own autonomy apart from him. She is massively independent of him. I know because that's who she is throughout the entire movie. I think it's because we all see she clearly does have her own interests/agency/character beyond that that we're all anxious to get more of that personally from her...which Disney won't do because they're Disney and certain characters can't come as their own especially when they fufilled another character's purpose in the og film.

Anna can't really do anything that isn't tied to Elsa because it's Elsa who's the reason any of Frozen happens at all.

Belle is always only the cheerleader of the Beast because his character arc is what drives the story.

Sally has to always be in toe of Jack because TNBC is Jack's story and she loves Jack.

But, we love Sally.

Give Sally her own limelight. Give her a limelight that isn't compltely making her a different character or demanding she be the same character as Jack.

Let Sally say #$%&

))

#sally the ragdoll #sally the nightmare before christmas #nightmare before christmas #the nightmare before christmas #tnbc analysis #sally skellington #long live the pumpkin queen

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the-friendliest-freak · 3 years ago

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crushedbyhyperbole · 5 years ago

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Good Ole Stuffing

A/N: For @xxloki81xx ‘s 2019 Xmas writing challenge, filling the song prompt: It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas - Michael Bublé. Thanks for organising this badass challenge

This is a Bucky Barnes x Reader w/ powers fic where their relationship is established. The story is set a couple of years after another of my fics, Disco Ball Diva. I think I might make a cluster of fics with this reader character because she’s hilarious and sassy as fuck.

Read Disco Ball Diva | Main Masterlist | Mobile Masterlist

Words: 3.3k

Warnings: 18+ only please... Smut, threats of bodily harm, and terrible terrible language.

Summary: The early arrival of Christmas and a prank courtesy of Sam ‘turkey boy’ Wilson ruins your super-chill fall vibe. Bucky makes it up to you, and let’s face it, his recipe for stuffing is right up your street.

November 1st. You sighed blissfully. This day always felt so peaceful, like all the tension that built up over the course of a year just seeped away leaving behind a fresh, crisp, new-feeling world much like the old one but lighter; unpacked and unburdened. This was one of the things you loved about Halloween, aside from the dark occult connotations, and the child-like excitement that came with this holiday, All Saints Day had its own special feel; everything felt cleansed. Except your mind – that was always filthy.

Halloween at the Avengers compound had been an evening garden party with a bon fire, a haunted house marquee, carnival games and spooky themed circus acts. It was more for the families of all the Avengers and Stark Industries staff (families with children), but you but you loved every second regardless. Kids in costumes running around excitedly with candyfloss, completely hyperactive on sugar and E numbers. Adults in costumes running around excitedly, completely hyperactive on alcohol. But that had been later in the night, after all the kids had gone and all who were left were those of your who lived in the compound.

This year, you and Bucky had done the couples thing. Collaborating costumes for the first time had been fun and your adaptation of Sweeny Todd and Mrs Lovett had gone down swimmingly, especially since you actually baked pies for the party; apple and blackberry, made to look like a bloody filling. Delicious.

It wasn’t the first Halloween you’d had together, you’d been together 2 years now and things were going great. You’d danced around each other when you’d first joined the team but as time grew on you came to realise that you truly cared for the man formerly known as The Winter Soldier, and learned that he felt the same. And boy, did he! Bucky poured his heart and soul into you, giving life to the aching hope you cherished, that one day all the tension between you would evolve into something amazing. And that he’d fuck you senseless. Phew! That man was passionate on a whole other level, even the thought of him was enough to get you going.

Sweaty and in desperate need of a different kind of release, you quit the gym having worked through your hangover, and hit the showers. If you’d have told yourself a couple of years ago that you’d be an exercise-loving badass Avenger with a badass Avenger boyfriend, you’d have told yourself to suck a dick. You’d come a long way since Tony Stark picked you up, back when you were a hotdog seller whose superpower was simple prismatic projection. Now you were a fully-fledged Avenger whose power could both protect and harm, as well as look snazzy as fuck. Your Avenger name was Suncatcher, which was a hell of a lot better than Rainbow Brite - the name Bucky first called you when you joined up. That asshole!

The communal area in the compound had a different feel altogether. Not the calm you loved about All Saints Day, but something glowing and bright and-.

“What the fuck is this shit?”

Your gym bag was heavy as you toted it the final few steps into the lounge where you observed a kind of carnage you’d never seen before, not even in the aftermath of battle.

Bucky’s head snapped in your direction, his glitter-covered hair fanned, sending sparkling dust everywhere. There were fairy lights wrapped around his metal arm, plugged in, no less, and he had baubles on the floor all around where he knelt.

“Hey sweetheart.” He was at your side in seconds, having ditched the lights and come to give you a hug and a soft peck on the cheek.

“Where’s the Halloween shit?”

Bucky’s mouth flapped in surprise at seeing your deep scowl, and he thumbed over his shoulder at his friend.

Ahh yes, the other culprit. The Falcon.

Sam had been knelt by Bucky, hidden from view when you’d entered. Now he was out in the open, exposed, and he was struggling to stifle his mirth.

“Well, this ain’t happenin’. Hell fuckin’ no!” You stood in front of the partially assembled Christmas tree, hands on hips, bristling. “I will fucking fight you both.” You were sure you looked fierce. Amazon queen that you were.

“C’mon, Rainbow Brite.” Sam smirked. “Tis the season to be jolly.”

“Fuck that!” You gripe indignantly. “It’s Halloween until December 24th and not a day before.”

“You tolerate this woman?” Sam jibed at Bucky, rolling his eyes with a long-suffering groan.

“Get stuffed, turkey boy.” Your irritation was only half serious, you loved talking shit, especially to Sam. “I light up his life like the glorious disco ball of sexy bitchin’ badassery that I am.”

Bucky pulled you in for a hug, chuckling against the top of your head. “Speaking of stuffing.” He murmured.

“Oh baby!” You moaned salaciously when his hands slid down to your ass. “You know I love me some of that 100 year old sausage meat stuffing.” You cackle with glee at the disgusted noise Sam made.

You were sorely tempted to push Bucky down on the sofa, straddle him and make a scene of dry humping him just to get Sam to flee the scene. Bucky would let you do it too, he’d long since stopped being embarrassed by your exhibitionist behaviour. But you wanted this man to fuck you senseless and that called for the soundproofed bedroom in which he slept.

Nightmares. It was for the nightmares, alright. But it certainly served your needs.

“If I’ve got to tolerate this Christmas bullshit before the corpse of Halloween is even cold then you,” you paused to poke his pec playfully, “robocock, are going to make it up to me.”

With a grin, Bucky tapped your thigh and bent down a little. Jump up, his eyes said.

No sooner were your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck, were his lips on yours in a searing kiss and he carried you away. Somewhere in the background Sam was muttering something about being scarred for life, counselling needed and some other lame ass complaint. You didn’t care. Bucky had you and he was going to take you.

There was no preamble once his bedroom door banged shut against the frame. Bucky threw you down onto the bed and tugged down your yoga pants, knickers and all. He knew what you needed from him, he was great like that, reading your mood and desire like you were an open book. It had come with much practice, but it had come.

You were yanked by your ankles to the edge of the bed and Bucky was inside you immediately, where he stilled, eyelids fluttering as he allowed you both a moment to adjust. You were tight, even after all this time as his lover. More so because he hadn’t warmed you up beforehand, but you were great. Perfect, in fact.

You grinned at his sharp intake of breath at the purposeful flex of your pelvic floor, teasing him, goading him to fuck you sore. To leave you with that burning throb that reminded you for days of the feel of him buried deep in your cunt.

“Lose the shirt.” You commanded with a sly smile and he obeyed instantly. “I’ve been thinking about you naked all damn day.”

“Yeah?” He threw your legs over his shoulders folded you in half, leaning over you until his hair tickled your face, swaying as he started a slow rhythm. “Been thinking about my cock too? I bet you have.”

You groaned deep as he slammed into you hard, once twice, three times. “What girl – doesn’t love – vintage – accessories?” Your grin was taunting and your hit your mark. You loved it when he talked dirty.

“I’ll give you vintage.” He growled, dragging your hands up above your head to pin you down, his hands locked with yours. “You’ll feel this tomorrow, for sure.”

It was brutal. The depth and force of his thrusts, and the angle he achieved by forcing your knees down onto the mattress by your ears using his weights as leverage. You could hardly breathe, but that was half the thrill. Gasping and keening, dizzy but exhilarated, you took every inch of him as he drilled you down into the bed. Paying rent, you called this.

“You gonna come for me, huh, sweetheart?” Bucky read the violent flush blooming on your face and décolletage with an arrogance smirk. “Gonna let me feel that sweet little pussy flutter? Yeah, you are! I’m gonna fuck you until you come around my cock.”

You had no words for him, only grunts and gasps made of what little air was in your lungs. He didn’t mind, he was giving you this, fucking you how you needed. It wasn’t always brutal like this, sometimes you couldn’t bare anything more than the softest touch, when you asked him to make love to you instead of fucking you into oblivion.

“Feel that?” He slammed into you hard and ground against you for a few beats, his pubic bone wreaking havoc with your clit, before resuming his punishing rhythm. “I’m gonna destroy that gorgeous hole of yours so bad you won’t sit right for a week.”

He was so close, straining to hold back until he pushed you over the edge. Impossibly he picked up the pace, pounding you ruthlessly until your eyes rolled back into their sockets. You practically drooled on yourself, groaning as you crested the huge mountain of intense pleasure he built for you. The wave crashed, destroying what was left of your self-control. You cried out, tears undammed as they spilled forth. It was exquisite, the sharpness of your climax and the painful burn where you were stretched so perfectly around his swollen prick.

The first violent contraction of your cunt dragged him with you, his cock twitched almost painfully as the pressure between his hips exploded. The air around you grew heavy to the point where he couldn’t draw breath, and as he filled you to brimming with his jism small flecks of multi-coloured light erupted all around.

He slowed and sat back on his knees, prolonging your orgasm with slow deep strokes until you began to relax. The light show was spectacular, undulating spectrums layered over one another, growing in size until you came back to yourself.

Bucky stroked his hands up and down your thighs gently, watching as your breathing settled and your eyes cracked open to meet his. Your shock was temporary, followed by guilt and suddenly he could breathe more than short shallow breaths. You hadn’t realised you’d used your power; it was a reaction to the intense emotions you’d felt. The first time it happened, Bucky panicked, but now he knew to ride it out, and sometimes it added to his pleasure.

“How was that?” he whispered, lowering your legs to the mattress and curling himself against your spine.

“Best stuffing, evarrrr…” You spoke quietly but with a smile, blissfully worn out and on the verge of unconsciousness.

“Not bad for 1940s vintage, huh, sweetheart?” He pressed a kiss into the hair at your temple and pulled you closer, feeling you relax back against his chest.

“They don’t make ‘em like they used to.” You mumble and Bucky chuffs a soft nasal chuckle, rubbing his stubbly cheek in your hair as you succumb to complete peace.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Everywhere you go…

Take a look at the five and ten, it’s glistening once again

With candy canes and silver lanes that glow…

You stirred from sleep, grumbling at the infernal racket that was threatening to ruin the amazing dream you were having about Bucky kissing every single inch of your body.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Toys in every store…

But the prettiest sight to see is the holly that will be

On your own front door…

The muffled vibrating that accompanied the horrendous tune pulled you further from sleep and made you crack an eye open like a sleeping dragon. A phone. Someone’s phone was ringing. Some Christmas-loving heathen’s phone. Ughh!

A pair of hop-a-long boots and a pistol that shoots

Is the wish of Barney and Ben

Dolls that’ll talk and will go for a walk

Is the hope of Janice and Jen

And Mom and Dad can hardly wait for school to start again…

You were soon bolt upright, slightly woozy but too grumpy to care. You scoured Bucky’s room for the source of the annoyance and fixed, confusedly, on your gym bag. What the fuck? Hands frantically searching, you pulled out your phone to find one missed call from ‘Fist of Victory’. Bucky must’ve called you to wake you from your nap. Blissed out as you were, he must’ve left you to sleep while he ran some errands and did some chores, like bringing your gym bag from the common room.

The screen flashed and the voice of Michael Bublé piped up once more. Bucky again.

It’s beginning to look a lot like-

You killed the call and, with an irritated nasal sigh, you delved into your settings to undo whatever heinous crime had been committed on your phone.

It’s beginning to look-

“Nope.” You swiped the red button, growing more annoyed by the second. Your phone asked you for a password but your pin didn’t work. “Don’t do this to me!” You groaned, trying everything you could think of short of factory restoring your device.

It’s beginning to-

“What the actual fuck?” You raged. It was no use. Some bastard had set your ringtone and locked you out of your own security. “Fuck Christmas!”

Dirty yoga pants pulled on in haste and phone in hand, you raced from Bucky’s room towards the common room where you hoped to find your beau or at least someone who could fix this travesty. Micheal Bublé’s voice chased you down the halls until you were about ready to flush your phone down the nearest shitter and call it quits.

Shoving through the door of the lounge, you were faced with 4 pairs of eyes around a dinner table laden with food; Bucky, Nat, Sam and Steve turned to look at you. Bucky’s smile faded when he saw the state of you, dishevelled and panting, pink thong over the top of your inside-out yoga pants; furious. You froze, cringing as the song continued uninterrupted in your hand.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Everywhere you go…

There’s a tree in the Grand Hotel, one in the park as well

It’s the sturdy kind that doesn’t mind the snow…

There was confusion from three of the four, Bucky included as he ended the call, but Sam – oh that bastard! You lunged for him and almost got to him too, before a solid metal arm wound around your waist and pulled you back.

“You!” You struggled hard against Bucky’s strength, but even if you got free Steve was ready to stop you before you could hurt yourself, and it would hurt, but it would be worth it to punch that smug parrot in his weak-looking jaw. “I’m gonna fucking pluck you, roast you and feed you to the homeless.”

The amused glint in Sam’s eyes goaded you further but you succumbed to the calming effect of Bucky’s arms tightly gripped around you. You dropped your head against his chest and groaned.

“C’mon, y/n! Get into the Christmas spirit.” Sam chuckled and you flipped him the bird.

He knew he’d won this round but you’d find some way of paying him back. Maybe you’d set fire to his tree on Christmas Eve so Christmas Day would have that vibrant bonfire smell that reminded you of Halloween, which was only yesterday. You huffed.

“Is this why the tree is up so early?” Nat said judgingly with a slight roll of her eyes. “You should probably fix her phone.”

“Hell no!” Sam snorted around a mouthful of food. “This is too much fun.”

“Suit yourself.” Nat hid her smirk behind the rim of her coffee cup. “I’m not going to save you when she chokes the life out of you, Darth Vader style.”

Coughing and choking preceded grains of rice spluttered into a napkin as Sam’s wide eyes flitted between you and Nat. “She what?”

“Wanda has been working with her on expanding the range of her powers so she can effect larger areas further away from her body.” Steve chimed in. “It’s impressive.”

“The air gets thick and suddenly you can’t breathe.” Nat cocked a brow. “She doesn’t even need to touch you and you’re choking to death.”

“From over there?” Sam pushed his chair back a few inches, like that would make a difference.

Steve and Nat nodded deliberately, solemnly.

You grinned, projecting a light show worthy of your wrath. Sam was out of his seat and backing up before Bucky turned you and positioned himself between you and your target. Sam didn’t know you couldn’t reach him and it was fun to make him squirm so you tried, like, really tried to stretch your power outwards at that winged menace. The air grew heavy and it seemed like everyone held their breath, everyone except you.

Bucky stroked his hand into your messy hair and tilted your head ready for his kiss. You knew he was trying to distract you, and it worked. Lips and tongues eagerly danced until you were moaning into his mouth and pressing yourself against his growing arousal. The room relaxed as he ravaged your lips, forgetting you were not alone. Your tummy growled aggressively and broke the spell, bashful giggles followed.

“Looks like I’m going to be making it up to you again, darlin’, on behalf of that bird brain.” Bucky kissed the tip of your nose.

“Well…” You drawled. “If you’re going to fuck me every time he pisses me off then I might sign him up on a contract.”

Bucky smeared his lips against yours in a passionate but tongueless kiss before swiping a plate full of food from the table and shoving it into your hands.

He swept you up bridal style and spun you around once for good measure. Nat caught your eye and you mouthed ‘thank you’ to her. She winked subtly with that pursed lop-sided smirk she does when she’s highly amused. Steve was looking elsewhere, seeing his childhood friend head-over-heels in love and so confidently displaying his emotions was a moment of awkward pride for him.

Sam was forgotten as Bucky carried you back to his room with a grin on his face that already had you weak. Your phone was forgotten, turned off in your hand, and as you disappeared down the hallway, those in the common room would swear they heard you humming a tune. A tune that fit with the words now playing in your head.

It’s beginning to look a lot like sex-mas

Several times a day

Take a look at that perfect bum, and that juicy pair of plums

And the cock that’s going to fuck my cares away

It’s beginning to look a lot like sex-mas

Get the toys and stuff

If I’m still walking straight, and not with a funky gait

Then he hasn’t truly boned me hard enough

A pair of nipple-clamp bells and some lube that smells

Like cherry and not something yuk

A straining hard cock that gives my ovaries a knock

And I’m gonna give it a suck

And when we’re done, we’ll watch some porn until we’re ready to fuck

It’s beginning to look a lot like sex-mas

Fingers tease me slow

When he’s giving me metal three and working them ruthlessly

Until I’m screaming and I’m ready to explode

It’s beginning to look a lot like sex-mas

And we’ve ruined Bucky’s bed

We’ll take it to the floor or stood by the door

Where I’m on my knees so I can give him head.

It’s beginning to look a lot like sex-mas

He’s gasping as he comes

Filling me to the brim and holding me close to him

Rubbing my cheeks so tender with his thumbs

I do love Bucky’s plums.

If you’ve enjoyed this, why not try my other Suncatcher fic, Disco Ball Diva. Same sassy reader character, just earlier on in her Avengers career.

#xxloki81xx2019xmas #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #reader insert #reader with powers #bucky barnes fan fic #marvel fan fic #writing challenge #my writing #suncatcher cluster #cloudy's writing

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creekfiend · 6 years ago

Text

Man can 2018 finally be the year ppl stop passing around those posts about HEY I BET YOU DIDN'T KNOW ABOUT THIS HILARIOUS DARK EDGY SIDE OF XMAS... KRAMPUS! AMAZING! LET'S BRING BACK KRAMPUS! POST KRAMPUS FANART! LOL! and perhaps, just, accept that krampus is wildly racist and antisemitic as a concept and uhh, is just, a hooknosed child-eating goblin in blackface, which is a fairly impressive racism x2 combo when you think about it, nicely done, Europe,

Like. Please.

It is the Modern Ages. Can.... can y'all just be NORMAL edgy weirdos and draw Nightmare Before Christmas fanart or something... I'm honestly begging u. Thx

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willgayers · 7 years ago

Note

“You can’t keep pretending it didn’t happen, cause guess what? It did!” Reddie

wowza! so this request has been in my ask box forever but here it finally is! this contains the whole losers club by the way, as it is a weekend-getaway ;-)

mainly reddie of course, but with some side-stenbrough and benverly!also a lot of platonic stozier

might start doing moodboards paired with my writing by the way, if i have the time lmao, but here’s one for this anyway!

The Losers Club were supposed to have a great weekend getaway.

They’d driven all the way to Bill’s parents’ cabin — and the series of misfortunate events had started literally on the day of arrival, Friday morning, when they finally got to the cabin and realized the electricity was off. Bill had to call his parents (because what the hell does a 18 year old know about shit like that?), who had to call the electrician and the teens had to sit in the car for a hour and a half, waiting for him to show up.

He took another hour to fix the power box but once he was done, the losers thought “well! now we can get this party started!”, but they were wrong.

“So… this really is the cabin?” Stanley deadpanned the second they stepped out of the car as he could now see the place fully, not exactly impressed. “You see Bill, when you said cabin, I imagined we were going to see a good old fashioned winter wonderland house. Not Jersey Shore- Xmas Edition.”

Richie laughed at the joke.

“Oh, c-come on, Stan. All cabins have m-magic.” Bill said.

“Magic?” Stan frowned.

“Yeah! Don’t you know?” Beverly joined. “It’s like, a thing. Cabins are so cozy. They’re in the middle of nowhere, away from the city noises… they’ve got that nice wooden smell too.”

“I bet this place smells like detergent.” Stan just snapped, and his friends laughed at his melancholia.

“Magic, huh?” Richie asked Beverly as they started walking in. “What’s that mean?”

“Shit, fucking hell!”

They turned their heads around to see Eddie kicking his suitcase that’s wheels got stuck in the snow, Mike rushing to help him.

Then Beverly and Richie turned to look at each other again.

“I’m sure you’ll find out.” Beverly smirked and walked ahead, leaving Richie standing there on the porch by himself, blushing a little but then shaking off whatever thoughts Beverly had just pushed in his mind before he walked in too.

—–—

“Mike, can you get the groceries?” Beverly asked in the kitchen, as she looked inside the fridge. It was empty as presumed, only a block of cheese and a half-empty bottle of Fanta inside.

“Sure,” Mike said and walked outside, his feet scrunching on the snow as he looked around himself, smiling at the sight. It was beautiful — trees around the cabin covered in snow, a lake opposite with a thick layer of ice over it. He didn’t understand what Stan meant by Jersey Shore Xmas Edition. This place was great!

He got to the car and pulled the door open, only to have his eyes widen in shock.

He walked to the back of the car and opened the trunk; sighing in relief as he found three bags. Grabbing them, he then closed the door and slammed the trunk close, walking back in.

“This place is huge, Billy!” Richie blurted out as he rushed down the staircase from upstairs. And he was right — the place was huge. It was made of wood, but very modern. One of the walls was completely just a big window, the kitchen was huge and it was just a one big room with the living room combined; the house had three floors (basement had a hot tub and a minibar), and four bedrooms.

“I guess so,” Bill shrugged, grabbing one of the grocery bags from Mike.

They placed them on the table and started to unload them, but frowned soon.

“Wait— t-these were all?” Bill asked.

“Yeah,” Mike said, a little confused too. “But this is just… the beer. And some… salad supplies?”

“Yeah, w-we had s-s-seven bags!” Bill blurts out.

“Richie, where’d you leave the rest of the bags?” Mike turned his gaze to Richie, and suddenly so did all of them — and Richie winded back the events in his head; Bill paid. Stan and Mike grabbed the bags. Beverly and Ben were already waiting by the car; Richie was waiting for Eddie to buy his chocolate bar and oh my fucking god Eddie looked so cute when he smiled to the cashier and Richie’s heart expanded in his chest and then Eddie asked if Richie was ready and Richie just starry-eyed nodded anddddd…

“Oh, shit,” Richie mumbled, and all the losers looked shocked. Beverly started to speak.

“Please don’t say that–”

“I forgot them to the store,” Richie said and literally all of them let out a whine or a groan, paired with super over-dramatic expressions but hey; forgetting groceries at the store is an annoying thing.

“I’m sorry!” Richie tried.

“Richie, it’s a thirty minute ride back!” Stan said. “I am not driving again! Were you not just with us in the car? The road here is a nightmare!”

“I said I’m sorry!” Richie said.

“God, Richie, you had one fucking job!” Stanley blurted out, holding his hand out.

“Okay, lets just c-calm down.” Bill said, giving his boyfriend a look, and Stan didn’t say anything, but this didn’t stop him from glaring at Richie who was trying to escape from everyone’s gazes, still standing at the final step of the stairs.

“We’re just gonna go luh-light today, and eat some s-salad!” Bill smiled, holding up a can of tuna and a bag of salad. “And tomorrow f-first thing we drive to the st-store.”

“Well I’m not fucking driving,” Stan snorted.

You don’t fucking have to, Richie wanted to snap, and like Bill would’ve known this, he looked at Richie who zipped his mouth.

“You don’t h-have to,” Bill just said to Stan. “I’ll drive. Lets just, m-make this salad now, okay?”

Stan looked at him for a moment before nodding, and grabbing a cucumber.

“Okay,” he mumbled, and Bill smiled lightly, pressing a kiss to his cheek, and Richie fought the urge to roll his eyes.

“We should probably take our stuff upstairs,” Ben said to Beverly, who nodded.

“Yeah,” she said.

“The first room on the left is mah-mine and Stan’s, because that’s my room.” Bill said. “Other than that, you’re f-free to choose.”

The couple nodded before leaving upstairs, dragging their bags.

“I can take that,” Ben said to Beverly who smiled admiringly as her boyfriend grabbed her bag; clearly struggling.

“Ben, it’s okay, I can carry it—”

“No, no I’m fine!” Ben choked out a laugh.

Eddie and Richie glanced at the two of them as they passed from between them, and then they glanced at each other; both of them clearly nervous.

“How many bedrooms did you say there were, Bill?” Richie asked.

“Four.” Bill said as he washed the salad leafs.

“And uh… the rooms, they wouldn’t happen to be single bedded, would they?” Eddie asked, clearing his throat.

“I… think one of them, is.” Bill mumbled, looking up as he was trying to remember.

“Great! Which one is it?” Eddie blurted out.

“I think it’s the one at the end of the h-hallway.” Bill said.

“Yeah, because I’m sleeping in the one down here,” Mike said. Everyone turned to look at him; like why would he wanna sleep down here by himself? Why would he volunteer?

“What?” He asked. “Someone’s gotta be the holy protector of this house. Besides; I’m the greatest cook. I’ll be the first one making breakfast.”

They all chuckled a little.

“Right! Breakfast. Some bacon, eggs, muesli… sounds great!” Stan said, and the smile faded from Richie’s lips as he realized where this was going. “But wait a minute— something’s wrong… oh, that’s right! You can’t make any, because Richie forgot them all!”

“Okay d-drop it Stan.” Bill said.

“I’m just annoyed! Richi—”

The look on Bill’s face made Stan stop talking though, and just mumble something under his breath before he continued on chopping the cucumber.

“Anyway, as I was s-saying, there’s one room that’s single bedded.” Bill said.

“Well great,” Eddie said. “We’ll take that one then!”

Richie was kind of disappointed at how eager Eddie was with taking the single-bedded room; did he really not wanna sleep in the same bed with Richie that bad? He wasn’t that bad, was he?

“Right?” Eddie asked a Richie, who nodded.

“Right,” he said.

“Well— the room won’t take itself, will it?” Stanley tilted his head.

“God, eat a freaking Snickers, Uris,” Richie just mumbled and threw his Nike bag over his shoulder as he started marching upstairs.

Mike tried to choke his chuckle as Eddie just smirked at Stan, before following Richie upstairs.

Stan was glaring after Richie, and then turned his gaze to Bill, who was also smirking at Richie’s joke — and Uris rolled his eyes.

—–—

“Is this the one —?” Richie asked as he opened a door on the left, revealing a bathroom. “Uh, no.”

“Unless you wanna sleep in a bathtub?” Eddie joked.

“I don’t think it’s big enough for the both of us, Eddie-Spaghetti.” Richie said, amused.

“We can take turns.” Eddie shrugged, and Richie laughed before turning back around and starting to walk further.

Eddie tried not to think of the way Richie’s laugh made something inside him flutter, and the way he found himself smiling at the sound.

Then Richie stopped at another door.

“Ah! It’s this one!” He said, walking in, only to see Beverly and Ben at the left corner.

“Hi,” Richie said, glancing at the bags on the floor. Eddie arrived behind him, raising a questioning brow.

“…hi?” Beverly and Ben said.

“What are you doing in mine and Eddie’s room?” Richie asked.

“It’s not yours, it’s ours.” Beverly said.

“Uh? No it’s not? It’s single-bedded!” Richie said.

“Uh, I don’t care — this one has a balcony.” Beverly said, opening her suitcase.

“Don’t open that! This is our room!” Richie said.

“God, why can’t you just share a bed?” Beverly asked, turning to the guys again.

Richie and Eddie glanced at each other, and then back to Beverly.

“Yeah, we’re not gonna sleep in the same bed.”

“Nope, sorry.”

“Or we could change the beds,” Ben suggested. “I bet they’re not that heavy.”

He walked over to one of the beds, and started pushing it. Not moving. He walked to the other side — still not moving.

The other three just looked at him, and Eddie twisted his mouth; this was realy not working.

“Maybe if I pull it from here-” Ben tried and started to pull the bed from the leg-end of it, but ended up falling down to his butt.

“Are you okay?” Beverly hurried to ask.

“God, what are these, fucking bolted to the floor?!” Ben blurted out.

“Well—” Eddie sighed. “I guess we’re just gonna have to take the other room.”

Richie turned his head to Eddie almost so fast his glasses dropped down.

“But we’re gonna have to sleep in the same bed,” he spoke.

“Well,” Eddie shrugged. “No can do.”

They made sure to give Beverly one last judging eyes though, before quietly walking to the last room at the end of the hallway.

And a whistle left Richie’s lips as he opened the door.

“Wow,” Eddie said.

It was huge.

The room had a giant window at the top of the ceiling, so wide that you wouldn’t have even needed a lamp because it illuminated the whole room; but regardless, there was a white big crystal lamp hanging on the ceiling. On the floor there was a sheep hide (presumably fake though, as Bill and his family were vegetarians), and the bed was a California king size.

“I think we got the master bedroom,” Richie said to Eddie, and they glanced at each other again, before both of them high-fived and rushed in.

“Holy shit, this room is like the size of my entire house!” Richie blurted out.

“God, we even have a mini fridge,” Eddie said, opening it.

Richie chuckled as he fell on the bed, his gaze following Eddie who was walking around the room, looking at every tiny detail in it; and Richie was looking at every tiny detail in him.

Truth be told, he had been in love with Eddie ever since sixth grade, yet he’d never have the courage to tell him how he felt other than by joking pick-up lines Kaspbrak never took seriously; because it was Richie! He flirted with everyone. But what Eddie didn’t know, that every time Richie flirted with him? He really meant it.

“Hey, good news!” Eddie spoke, his head inside some room behind the corner.

“Yeah?” Richie asked, and Eddie turned around.

“We have a bathroom — so there’s still that bathtub.” Eddie said, and Richie laughed.

“What, I take the bathtub and you take the bed?” He asked.

“Well since you offered,” Eddie shrugged, soon a smirk rising to his lips; and Richie couldn’t help but smile at the sight. Eddie saw the… look in Richie’s eyes, something he wasn’t sure if he’d seen before, and he felt his tummy fill with butterflies as he just chuckled and glanced away. And then the door swung open.

“Guys! Food is ready!” Ben said, his jaw then dropping as he looked around the room.

“Wow,” he said.

“My words exactly, Benny-boy!” Richie said, jumping down from the bed. “Still want that balcony room?”

“You two hit jackpot.” Ben mumbled, and Richie let out a raspy laugh, ruffling his friend’s hair on his way out; and Eddie felt his legs go limp.

God, this was going to be a long, long weekend.

—-

“Popcorn?”

Richie lifted his head up to Stanley who arrived in the living room with a bowl of popcorn in his hands later that day.

“Wow, is it poisoned?” Richie joked to his friend who laughed, clearly over his mood from earlier.

“No, it’s not poisoned, Rich.” Stan said, and Richie smirked before he reached out for the bowl.

“Oh wait, actually—” Stanley joked as Richie’d already thrown the whole handful into his mouth.

“Kidding.” Uris smirked and Richie laughed, as Stan started to hold the bowl out to the rest of them.

“I still can’t believe your parents own a cabin this big,” Richie said, as the whole club were sitting in the living room, some of them on the couch and some of them on the floor next to the sofa table, sitting on top of a another freaking sheep hide. “Are y'all secretly millionaires or something?”

Bill chuckled at Richie’s question, sipping on his beer.

“No, unf-fortunately.” Bill said. “This cabin used to be my grandpa’s.”

“Your grandpa’s? But this is so modern,” Eddie said. Him and Richie were sitting next to each other on the couch; and Eddie wasn’t drinking either. Richie was a little surprised at this, because Richie not drinking had never stopped Eddie before — it had never stopped any of them before, honestly, but now Eddie wasn’t. He’d objected from taking a beer twice already. But maybe he just wasn’t in the mood.

God, Richie; it’s not because of you, he thought to himself.

“Yeah well, grandpa never l-liked it.” Bill shrugged. Maybe that’s why.

“So was your grandpa a millionaire?” Beverly smirked from the couch, sloughing with the beer can lazily in the hand that was hanging out from the hand rest.

“More or l-less.” Bill said and all their eyes widened.

“Your grandpa was a millionaire and you never told us?!” Richie blurted out, and Bill laughed.

“Well why would’ve I?” He asked. “It’s not like I had the m-muh-money.”

“God. A millionaire in our midst.” Richie said. “Step back Stan, I might marry Bill.”

Eddie glanced at Richie as their friends laughed, feeling as though someone had just punched him in the chest. He lowered his gaze and just leaned to grab some popcorn from the bowl on the table, trying to eat his feelings away.

“Not if I do it first,” Stan said, throwing a hand over Bill’s shoulders and smiling at him.

“I’m serious, there might be a ring to it! Richard Denbrough.” Richie said, fake majestic, and everyone laughed again; all except for Eddie.

Stanley just rolled his eyes amusedly, saying; “Tough luck, Tozier.” — before pulling Bill in to a kiss.

“Get a room,” Ben joked.

Mike and Beverly chuckled as Richie turned his gaze to Eddie, who didn’t look entertained at all. He looked like he was drowning inside his big hoodie, his legs stretched out on the table in front of them, and he just looked so cute Richie could’ve swooned right there and then.

“You okay, Eds?” Richie asked.

“Fine.” Eddie just said.

God, what’s wrong with you?! He thought to himself. It was just a joke!

“Yeah? You don’t look like it.” Richie chuckled. “You’re sulking.”

They hadn’t even noticed that the rest of the losers were paying attention to them now.

“No I’m not,” Eddie said.

“Yes you are,” Richie said, leaning to press his finger against Eddie’s cheek to try and pull the corners of his mouth up, and Eddie burst out in a chuckle.

“Stop!” He laughed.

“There! Not broody anymore,” Richie smirked, and the other losers exchanged looks.

–—–

“So uh… how are we going to… do this?”

Richie and Eddie were standing on opposite sides of the bed in their pj’s, looking at each other and the bed alternatively.

“Well uh… you take that side and I take this side,” Eddie said from the left side.

“Right,” Richie said. “So we just… get in.”

“Right,” Eddie said.

“Right.” Richie said again.

Eddie nodded, and they both climbed to the bed, getting under the blankets; and then they realized the blankets were in fact just… a one, blanket.

“Uh…” Richie mumbled.

“Well I mean— it’s a huge blanket,” Eddie said. “I’m sure we can manage with it.”

Richie nodded in agreement. It wasn’t like he had anything against this.

“Yeah, you’re right,” Richie nodded.

They looked at each other in the slightly bothered silence, the room was dark other than the light around the bed that was coming from yellow night-lamps on the night tables on both sides of the bed.

“So… good night,” Eddie said.

“Good night,” Richie said back.

They looked at each other for another few seconds before Eddie nodded and gave a small awkward smile, and then turned his back to Richie, leaning to pull the string of his side’s lamp to shut it. Richie looked at the back of his head for a moment (and Eddie sensed this, as he didn’t feel the bed shift first), before he turned to his side and leaned to close his lamp.

Neither one of them fell asleep; they didn’t get even close to it; and then, after approximately five minutes, Richie spoke.

“You up?” He asked.

“Yeah,” Eddie said.

“I’m not even tired.” Richie admitted, and Eddie smiled a little, even though in the dark room it couldn’t be seen. Well, and he did still have his back towards Richie too.

“Neither am I,” Eddie said, and Richie turned around. Eddie did the same.

“So you wanna like… talk?” Richie asked.

“Okay,” Eddie shrugged softly. “About what?”

Richie shrugged.

“Something.” Richie said.

“That’s a wide subject.” Eddie chuckled, and Richie smiled.

“I like your laugh.” The words rolled off of Richie’s tongue and he did not mean to say that out loud — but oh, shit, he did.

Eddie’s brows raised up a little and Richie was too afraid to turn his gaze away, as his lips were a little parted.

“I mean—”

“You like my laugh?” Eddie smirked, amused.

“No, that’s not what I meant-”

“So you don’t like my laugh?” Eddie asked, faking offended.

“No, I like your laugh.” Richie mumbled, embarrassed, his cheeks pink.

Eddie looked at him in the dark, a wide smile on his lips. He then decided to speak too.

“I like your…” everything, he could’ve said. “Glasses.”

“I don’t even have them on right now,” Richie said.

“Can you see anything?” Eddie asked, actually a little curious.

“Honestly? No.” Richie said, and Eddie laughed again. “Especially cause it’s dark. I’m blind as a bat.”

“Awww,” Eddie cooed, and that did something to Richie; he didn’t know what it was, but he could feel the tension in the room change, so he got more courage.

“I like your hair,” Richie continued.

“I like your hair too,” Eddie smirked.

“What, this old thing?” Richie joked, running his fingers through his hair, and Eddie bit his lip gently — God, how he wanted to do that.

“I like some of your jokes.” He just said, his voice going mellow.

“Holy shit, now that’s a compliment!” Richie blurted out, and Eddie smirked.

“Don’t let it get up to your head.”

“I like your smile,” Richie said, earning exactly that from Eddie, even though he had just brushed Eddie’s previous comment off. But come on, as if he was gonna let that one slip.

“I like your eyes.“

"That’s great, I’d look kinda scary without them.” Richie said, and Eddie laughed out loud, making Richie smile in the dark.

“Oh my God,” Eddie said. “That’s awful.”

“But it’s true,” Richie said.

“It is true.” Eddie agreed, biting down on his lip to stop himself from smiling.

“You… you said you can’t really see in the dark, but that doesn’t stop you from like… feeling, right?” He asked, his tummy flipping with butterflies as he thought of what to do next.

Richie felt exactly the same, even though he had no idea where Eddie was going with his. He kinda did, but he wasn’t sure.

“That’s… yeah, glasses don’t really… have anything to do with… feeling.” He uttered out, palms getting sweaty.

“Good,” Eddie said, before leaning to close the gap between the two of them, pressing his lips to Richie’s.

A tiny grunt left Richie’s mouth as he felt Eddie’s lips on his, and after processing for hardly three seconds, he grabbed Eddie’s wrists and rolled himself on top of the smaller boy.

The kiss turned passionate soon, both their tongues fighting for dominance — the kiss was hungry and thirsty and desperate for all the times that they’d been supposed to be doing this already.

Richie’s lips soon moved down to Eddie’s neck, earning a sigh from Eddie.

“I like your— your lips,” Kaspbrak breathed out as Richie kissed down his tanned skin. “-especially on me ohmygod.”

“Your skin smells like peppermint,” Richie moaned out in ecstasy, before attaching his lips to Eddie’s again; and it felt so right.

Outside snow was landing down in big flakes, covering the already white ground even more, the night-sky was filled with stars and Richie and Eddie forgot about everybody else in the entire world;

This must be what Bill and Beverly meant by “the magic.”

–—–

“Wakey wakey so we can get eggs and bakey that Richie forgot in the store!”

Richie woke up to Stan’s voice in the lobby, opening his eyes; and nearly gasping out loud at the sight of Eddie in his arms. His brunette head was resting against Richie’s bicep, his arm wrapped around Richie’s and their legs tangled together; and slowly, the events of last night started coming back to Richie. The way Eddie’s body felt on top of his, the way his lips felt like on Richie’s, the way his name sounded like coming out of Eddie’s mouth in a soft whisper-

“Richieeee and Eddiieeee are you up?!”

“Shit,” Richie breathed out.

Stanley was gonna march in any second now, and if he saw Eddie and Richie spooning, he wouldn’t stop talking about it ever, so Richie had to do something. He kept on glancing at the door, and Eddie, biting down to his own lip, trying to think of a way to get out;

And then he just jumped up, Eddie immediately waking up.

“A spider!” Richie squeaked, pointing at the bed.

“Shit, where?!” Eddie blurted out, jumping up too.

“Get dressed, Stanley’s coming!” Richie hissed as he pulled on his sweatpants, and Eddie’s eyes widened, before he grabbed his pajama pants and pulled them on, getting his sweater over his head just in time as the door opened.

“Oh, great! You’re up!” Stan said.

“Uh-huh!” Eddie and Richie rushed to say.

Stan just did them the finger guns before walking away, whistling a tune.

Looks like Richie and Eddie weren’t the only ones who’d experienced the “magic” last night.

“So uh… about last night-” Eddie started.

“We should go,” Richie cut Eddie off. “I’m starving.”

Eddie looked at him for a moment before nodding.

“Right,” he said, and even though Richie felt kind of bad, he just nodded back at Eddie.

“I’m gonna… get changed.” He said.

“Yeah, me too,” Eddie said, but neither of them moved. And then Kaspbrak realized it would be awkward for some reason; not for him, but for Richie apparently. Which was weird, because they’d literally just been naked with each other.

“I’m… gonna go do it in the bathroom,” Eddie however still said.

“Right, okay.” Richie said.

Eddie just nodded and grabbed some clothes from his suitcase, before walking to the bathroom.

Why was Richie acting like this? Last night he was alright, why was he so weird now?

—–—

Mike, Stan and Ben were chopping for wood outside as Beverly was warming up the sauna near the pier; they were gonna do the whole “winter swimming and then sauna”- thing later that day; so the only ones left to go to the store with Bill were Richie and Eddie.

Richie was horrified; he’d have to spend time with Eddie again? God, he’d literally just woken up with his sight full of Kaspbrak, not to mention last night — now he’d have to go grocery shopping with him?

He felt odd; not that he didn’t wanna hangout with Eddie. Because he did. Like, a lot. Too much. Damn, way too much. That’s why he didn’t wanna hangout with him. And Eddie was just so — normal!

“Maybe they still have our groceries from last night?” Eddie asked from the backseat as they sat in silence in the car.

“Yeah, maybe,” Bill said. “At least I have the r-receipt.”

“You do?” Eddie asked. “That’s great! Just — lets not forget the bags this time, huh, Richie?”

Eddie’s chuckle echoed to the front of the car where Richie swallowed nervously.

“Yeah, lets not,” he just said.

Eddie glanced at him from the mirror, turning his gaze away immediately though as Richie glanced back at him. He was just trying to keep things normal, because Richie was clearly making a big deal out of last night. Not that it wasn’t a big deal, because it was, but Richie made it seem like it shouldn’t have happened. And it was starting to upset Eddie.

—–—

The grocery trip wasn’t as bad as it could’ve been, if you don’t count Richie hiding behind every possible aisle and/or pile of soda cans etc, and now they were already back inside the cabin, cooking some dinner.

“I can’t believe that they gave you everything we forgot,” Beverly said. “That’s amazing!”

“We’re tourists from the city. They probably did it out of pity,” Stanley snorted and everyone chuckled; except for Richie, who was still walking on eggshells around Eddie.

“You okay?” Eddie asked, looking into Richie’s eyes, trying to get the deeper message to him - but Richie just nodded, continuing to mix the mashed potatoes.

“Hey, you’ve got some-” Eddie leaned to brush a tiny bit of the mash off of Richie’s cheek, and literally all of the losers dropped what they were doing to stare at the pair; but Richie was lightly gaping at Eddie, and then they turned their gazes to the losers, who quickly went back to whatever they were doing.

Eddie too just grabbed his salmon slices and waddled over to the oven.

Throughout the whole dinner, Eddie and Richie didn’t look at each other, and when Richie asked if someone could pass the ketchup, Eddie just went for it automatically but Richie refused to take it.

“You want it?” Eddie asked, and the second he did, both him and Richie went red— remembering certain details.

“Oh my God,” Stanley growled, grabbing the ketchup bottle and lightly slamming it in front of Richie, before flashing him a fake, snarky smile. “There you go, Tozier.”

The other losers definitely had a hunch.

–—–

“So the sauna’s all ready?” Mike asked, as the whole lot of them stood outside wearing nothing but swimwear, their gazes glued to the hole made to the water in front of them. None of them had ever tried winter swimming, except for Bill — and he claimed it was fun.

“Uh-huh,” Beverly said.

Eddie was shaking from the cold, his hands wrapped around his tiny frame, and Richie felt so bad; he just wanted to pull him against his chest and warm him up, but he couldn’t.

“So… who wants to go first?” Ben asked.

“I think Bill should do it since he’s done it already,” Eddie breathed out, trying to warm himself up by rubbing his hands up and down his arms.

“I think Bill should be the last,” Mike said. “Because he really is the only one who’s done it; he should stay and make sure we’re all doing it right.”

“That’s true,” Stan said. “Richie might accidentally drown himself.”

“Ha-ha, Uris,” Richie faked a laugh, and Stan smirked.

“Okay, I’m gonna go first!” Beverly said.

“As always,” Richie mumbled, flashbacks from the quarry hitting him.

“Okay, just lower yourself in and swuh-swim to the end, th-then swim back and just ruh-run to the sauna.” Bill said, and Beverly nodded.

“Got it,” she said, and started to lower herself in; and she screamed the second she did.

“Wow,” Richie said. “That how she screams in b-”

“Do not say it,” Ben deadpanned but Richie couldn’t help but smirk nevertheless.

“Now just swim!” Bill chuckled, and Beverly did as told, shrieking the whole time though, before she was finally back and up. The boys laughed as she ran inside to the tiny sauna- building next to the pier.

“Next?” Stan asked, and Ben raised his hand.

“Oh, shit, this really is cold,” he breathed out, and Bill smirked as Ben swam from end to end and soon he ran in too.

“Okay, I am done waiting here in the cold,” Eddie blurted out, and he went in fast.

“Shit, shit, fucking shit, fuck fuck shit fuck-”

He cursed his way through it, and for a moment Richie forgot about how awkward things were between them and just laughed with the rest of their friends.

Then Eddie jumped up.

“How was it?” Richie asked, still in the relaxed state.

“Oh you’re not gonna survive it Tozier,” Eddie just breathed out before sprinting to the sauna, and Richie bit his lip gently as he stared after him.

Next went Stanley (who throughout the whole thing reminded his friends repeatedly about how this was such a bad idea and how he hates them), then went Mike (who giggled adorably and said ‘Wow, that really was cold!’ once he got out) and soon there were only Richie and Bill.

They stood there in silence, glancing at each other and the water.

“You know, just, w-whenever you’re ready.” Bill said, hinting Richie to just do it.

“It’s probably really cold though, right?” Richie asked.

Bill raised his brows.

“It is, yes.” He said.

“What if I just didn’t do it?” Richie asked, and Bill fake gasped.

“Are you ch-chickening out, Richie?” He asked, and Richie glanced away.

“Oh, you are suh-so not gonna chicken out!” Bill laughed, grabbing Richie from the arm to try and pull him towards the water.

“Hey!” Richie laughed, trying to protest.

“Get in!” Bill laughed.

“No! No—”

“Guys! Hey guys!”

Both Bill and Richie turned their gazes towards the sauna, seeing Beverly.

“The power’s out. Again.”

———

Back inside in the (now dark) house again, there were candles all around as the losers were all cuddled on the sofa under blankets, and dressed now — Richie was sitting alone on the opposite chair though, and him and Eddie kept on glancing at each other every now and then as Bill stood in the corner of the room, speaking to the phone.

“Tuh-tomorrow?! Wha do you m-mean tomorrow, mom?!” He snapped, and pretty much all the losers sighed or whined in frustration.

“I’m sorry honey, that’s just what he told. He’s not in town today, he’s coming back first thing tomorrow morning.”

“Well wuh-what are we supposed to do till then, huh?! It’s already getting coh-cold in here! By the time he arrives we’ll b-be in h-h-hypothermia!”

“Get some wood for the fireplaces.”

“We already u-used them all for the s-s-sauna!”

“You went to the sauna? Billy, honey, you know it takes a lot of wood. Why would you-”

“Well how was I supposed to know that the p-p-power goes out when it was just fixed yesterday!”

“You should really find a new electrician,” Richie noted and Eddie rolled his eyes in amusement.

“Why don’t we just go get some wood?” Mike suggested.

“What, you suggest we chop down a tree?” Stan snorted.

“No, Stanley, there’s that gas station nearby. Maybe they have some?” Mike said.

“That’s true,” Ben said.

Bill listened to them, and then sighed to the phone.

“W-we’re gonna go get some wood from the g-gas station.” He said.

“Okay. Drive carefully though, the road’s a nightmare this time of the year!”

Stan smirked smugly a little as he heard Bill’s mom agreeing with him.

“Sure. Bye.”

And then Bill hung up.

“So, who’s going?” He asked.

“Richie,” Stan said.

“Huh?” Richie asked.

“You and Bill are the only ones who didn’t swim,” He shrugged. “You’re not freezing.”

“True.” Ben murmured, snuggling closer to Beverly.

“Well I don’t wanna go alone!” Richie blurted out. “It’s dark already!”

“Aww, are you scared of the dark?” Stan joked. “Or scared that a yeti will come?”

Richie glared at Stan.

“I’ll come wih-with you.” Bill said.

“Bill, this is your cabin,” Beverly said. “You have to be here.”

“Why?” Bill frowned.

“Well if something happens!”

“We have c-cellphones.” Bill said, holding his phone up. “See?”

Then he glanced at the screen.

NO SERVICE

“Shit,” he blurted out.

“What?” They all asked in unison.

“We just lost the reception,” Bill mumbled.

“Oh, great!” Richie blurted out, falling back in his seat. “This is just like the beginning of a horror movie!”

“Richie, come on.” Beverly said.

“Teens go to a cabin to have some fun time — they drink, they have a fun time, they have sex-”

All the losers turned to look at Eddie with wide eyes, and Kaspbrak went bright red as Beverly mouthed a “nice!” at him. Richie hadn’t even realized what he’s said as he was too busy staring at each finger he held up at a new thing.

“-then the power goes out, they lose cell reception, the nerd has to go get some supplies by himself—! You’re literally throwing me out to Jason in here!”

“Well, no can do, Tozier.” Stan said. “We’re all freezing, Billy owns this place-”

“I’ll go with you,” Eddie said, and all the losers turned to look at him.

“What?” Richie asked.

“Yeah,” Eddie shrugged, getting out from the blanket he was sharing with Beverly and Ben. “Lets go. Before Jason awakens.”

“You’re… you’re-”

“Yes, I’m coming with you, lets just go!” Eddie said, wanting to escape from under the amused eyes of their friends who had just totally realized the two of them had had sex.

“Okay,” Richie just then said and got up.

“W-wait a minute guys,” Bill said. “We don’t have s-service, so you gotta drive cuh-carefully, okay?”

“Okay,” Richie said and Eddie nodded.

“Do we need anything else?” Eddie asked and Richie glanced at him; Eddie glanced back, Richie blushed a little at the thought of having to sit inside that car alone with Eddie and turned his gaze away.

“If they have flashlights.” Stan said. “That would be great.”

“Okay. Flashlights and wood. Got it.” Richie nodded, and they started to walk away. Richie grabbed the car keys from the basket on the vestibule table, and they stepped out of the cabin.

They rushed over to Bill’s Range Rover (aka, Soccer Mom Mobile), and Richie started it in silence.

He took off from the front yard, and as he drove on the snowy road only lit by the lights of the car, Eddie finally spoke.

“Can we-”

“Eddie, please, I’m trying to concentrate on the road,” He said.

Eddie looked at him for a moment before nodding.

“Okay,” he said.

The gas station wasn’t as far as the grocery store, so it took them about fifteen minutes to get there;

Only to realize it was closed.

“Fuck!” Richie cursed out, kicking the door after trying to desperately pull it open.

“Calm down,” Eddie frowned.

“We just drove fifteen minutes for nothing, Eds!” Richie snapped. “Fifteen minutes, on a narrow, deadly road for nothing!”

“Maybe he’s just having a cigarette break or something,” Eddie said.

“This sign says closed. I think that means the place is closed.”

“There’s a phone number,” Eddie said, trying to ignore the slightly offensive tone Richie had just used. “Why don’t we call it? Check your phone. Do you have reception?”

“Alright, alright,” Richie mumbled, overwhelmed by all the babbling from Eddie.

“I have,” he said and glanced at the brunette.

“Well great! Call the guy,” he said and Richie nodded.

He tapped the number to his phone, before calling it.

Beeeeeep.

“He’s not picking up,” Richie said. “What if he’s sleeping?”

“He closed the store fifteen minutes ago, Richie. He’s probably not sleeping,” Eddie said.

Beeee-

“Hello?”

“Hey!” Richie blurted out. “Hello, hi, I’m uh, outside your gas station and I had no idea it closes at 9pm and my friends and I are staying at a cabin nearby and the power went off and we’re in desperate need of some wood and flashlights.”

Silence.

“So you want me to come open the store that I just closed.” The man said, a little rude.

“…yes please?” Richie mumbled.

“What’s your name?”

“Richie.”

“And how old are you?”

“Uh… eighteen.”

“God damn, you kids! I don’t understand how your parents let foolish babies like you out there, when you don’t even have a thing such as ready-wood prepared! Let me guess, you also didn’t bring any water?”

“Hey, we do have water and we used all our woods for a sauna,” Richie said, kinda offended.

“Okay, right… Well, I’m turning around now — but it’s gonna take me half an hour.”

“Half an hour? If you closed the store fifteen minutes ago and you’re not even home yet how is it-”

Eddie raised his brows at Richie in a ARE YOU SERIOUSLY COMPLAINING NOW?- way, so Richie shut it.

“Okay. Thirty minutes. Got it.”

“That’s what I thought.”

“Thank you, bye.”

And then the man hung up.

“Thirty minutes. We gotta wait thirty freaking minutes,” Richie growled, stomping back to the car. He got in, and soon after Eddie climbed in from the passenger’s side.

Richie put the heating back on as he rubbed his hands together, gently breathing against them to try and get them warmer. His glasses were all fumed and he removed them, starting to rub them clean with the hem of his shirt that was peeking out from under his jacket.

Eddie looked at him, feeling kinda bad.

“Do you want my mittens?” He asked softly.

“I’m fine.” Richie lied with kind of a cold- tone of voice as he readjusted his glasses to his face.

“Okay, that’s it,” Eddie spat, and Richie turned his head towards him.

“Huh?” He asked.

“You can’t just keep pretending like it didn’t happen, Richie, cause guess what— it did!” Eddie snapped and Richie swallowed.

Oh, shit.

Here we go.

The conversation Richie was trying to dodge.

“I don't—”

“God help me Richie if you say you have no idea what I’m talking about,” Eddie breathed out, and Richie went quiet.

“I don’t get it! What did I do? Did I do something wrong?” Eddie asked, Richie turning his gaze away. “I thought you wanted it too, I—”

“I wanted it!” Richie blurted out, slamming his legs down towards the seat in frustration, and Eddie went quiet. “Okay?! I wanted it so bad you have no idea.”

“Then why are you like this?!” Eddie blurted out back at him.

“Because I’m in love with you and it scares me!”

Eddie’s lips parted as he looked at Richie, who closed his eyes, not daring to look at Eddie.

“You’re in…”

“Love with you. Yes.” Richie said. “And last night was— for you, it was probably just a heat of the moment kind of thing, but for me it—”

“It wasn’t just a heat of the moment kind of thing,” Eddie said, and now Richie turned his head towards him.

“It… wasn’t?”

“No,” Eddie shook his head lightly, a soft frown on his face. “Richie, I…”

He took a deep breath, before he turned his gaze away to the dark winter and the ugly yellow lit up logo of the gas station, and finished his sentence.

“I love you.”

Richie looked at him, inhaling shakily as he felt like his whole body went limp as Eddie just stared out of the window, nervously licking his lips.

“Can you… say that again,” Richie asked, and Eddie turned his gaze back to Richie, a surprised look on his face, as he soon started to smile.

“Yeah,” he said, leaning closer. “I love you.”

A smile started tugging on the corners of Richie’s mouth as well, and Eddie chuckled, glancing at Richie’s lips before kissing him softly.

Richie kissed him back, lifting his other hand to grab Eddie’s cheek.

God, why had he been so afraid? There was nothing to be afraid of. He should’ve figured it out by himself; Eddie was the one who kissed him last night. And Eddie hadn’t told Richie to stop. Not once. Of course he liked Richie too.

They seemed to had lost the track of time, beacause suddenly—

Knock knock knock.

Both Richie and Eddie yelped out, Eddie pulling himself back to his own seat and Richie turning his head, to see an old guy with brown beard.

Richie rolled down his window.

“You must be Richie.” The guy said.

“Uh, yeah,” Richie said. “Wow— did it… did thirty minutes pass already?”

“No, I was faster than expected.” Then he gestured Richie to come out, who glanced at Eddie (that just nodded with a small smile) before he did. “You see, the road was…”

Eddie smiled and bit down to his lip as he watched Richie follow the guy, and soon he felt a ridiculously girly giggle leave his mouth— but he didn’t even care.

Richie got the wood and flashlights and apologized and thanked the gas station owner for about a dozen times, and he just told Richie to be more prepared the next time. And before Richie could get in, he gently nudged him to the side and said, “remember to be safe, also.” as he nodded towards the car, knowing damn well Eddie was inside, and at first Richie thought it was kind of creepy but then the man let out a raspy laugh, and Richie laughed back. He just seemed like a harmless old codger.

“Sure. And thanks again,” Richie said and the man just nodded, still snickering. He then waved at Eddie also, who waved back with a smile.

“He seemed nice,” Eddie commented.

“Yeah.” Richie agreed, not wanting to tell him about the man’s little “final addition”, and then he started the car.

The car ride back, of course wasn’t as awkward as on the way to the station, and Richie even tried to hold Eddie’s hand while he was driving but they learned that it was not that good of an idea as Richie nearly drove them off the road.

“Ho-ho-ho, merry Christmas!” Richie joked, slamming the door open. “And happy Hanukkah.” He added, glancing at Stanley who rolled his eyes.

“We have some wood,” Richie said, holding up a bag.

“And flashlights!” Eddie said, holding up a pack of them.

The losers noted the now zen- tension between the of them, and couldn’t help but smile. And they definitely didn’t wanna tell them that their trip was actually for nothing — as they’d found out that the only reason the power was out was because Ben had accidentally pulled one of the cords out.

“Great!” Mike said, clapping his hands together.

“You wanna light up the fireplace?” Beverly asked.

“Sure!” Richie said, placing the wood down.

“Wait, I forgot my phone in the car,” Eddie said, handing Richie the flashlights. He was about to turn around and walk away, but Richie grabbed him by the arm.

“Wait,” he said, and pulled Eddie close, pressing his lips to Eddie’s who was taken by surprise, straight up melting to the kiss and losing all function because this was in front of all their friends!

“Oh, my, God.” Beverly just said; they had all known, of course. They’d all known Richie and Eddie had undeniable chemistry, they’d all known something had happened at the cabin, they’d all found out what that something was; but they were still a little taken aback by actually seeing this now.

“Now you can go,” Richie said as he pulled away, and Eddie was a little dizzy, not even sure what he was supposed to do, but then he remembered.

“R-right,” he stuttered out, before turning around and walking out.

“Wow,” Ben commented.

“Wow exactly,” Stan said. “You turned him into Billy! Now I might just want a kiss from you!”

“F-funny, Stan.” Bill joked, and Stanley smiled sweetly at him. Richie then kneeled down in front of the fireplace to start tucking the fire in, and Mike leaned to whisper to Stan.

“So we’re just not gonna tell them about the power?”

Stan looked at him and shook his head with a tiny smirk, and Mike nodded, smiling wide.

“Okay.”

@superbyersbros@xbell22@donthateonk8@stenbroughbros@reddiebrekmyheart@itsgreywaterrichie@donvex@blueeyespurpleskies@ageorgymi@oh-youre-the-worst@eddiekaaspbraak @whipashwhipash@rissyq @richietoaster @edskasqbrak @urtury @bukiminajimu @kcutieeesblog@stansmansuris@adorefack@reddieaddict@icyeyes102@denbroughbill@graveyardshipper@taletellingsir@anxiety-freak-yuuri@rheddie@queertrashmouth@richiefreakingtozier@castletozier@tohzier @80soleff@lonewolfhard@low-key-dying @sad-synth@richietoaster @badboyharrington@beepbeep-losers@temptedtozier@kaspbraccs@kylieee827-blog @sad-synth @low-key-dying@officiallyreddie@reddietofall@stanleyboii@eternitynurarms@remushlupin@turtleneckrichie@rosegoldrichie@80srichie@asteroidbill@lonewolfhard@trashmouthgazebos@littlepointman @finnhardwolf @allison0609 @fabulousprinceali @tatiscribbles @s-s-georgie

#reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #it 2017 #it 2017 fanfiction #fics #stenbrough #stozier #benverly #bill denbrough #stanley uris #beverly marsh #mike hanlon #ben hanscom #losers club

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compiledrammings · 3 years ago

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Man, I bet Holiday/Christmas/Legally Distinct Winter Festival at Bratum would be such a lovely affair. Christmas Eve you can find Arin and Garret running around finishing up Christmas shopping. In the late evening everyone meets at the Church of Helm for some kind of community event, cuz it's a massive central location. There's a float contest that's actually a sculpture contest, cuz it's a dwarven holiday. During Christmas Day the others show up to Queltrin and Odexa's place to exchange proper gifts (Garret brings most of breakfast except for the bacon, which Kaven brings too much of)

And then in the upper part of the city there's a winter fair that probably resembles an early kind of American State Fair(tm) with all kinds of absurdly dangerous contraptions and rides to celebrate, cuz like the dragonborn don't really get the religious or culture weight of the definitely dwarven holiday, but an excuse to have a party is an excuse to have a party

Forgotten realms holiday in Rime is probably basically nonexistent

Christmas-au in Rime tho is the coziest, cutest thing. Bunny makes everyone matching ugly Christmas sweaters, Bright spends two whole days decorating the most elaborate Christmas tree the Dale has ever seen, and Flake is bah-humbug throughout the entire thing but secretly enjoys the pictures of his wonderful little crew he's tripped and fallen into

Maria obviously hosts and makes an elaborate Xmas feast

And does a yearly dramatic reading of "the night before christmas" in the middle of town

It's become a tradition for children (or really drunk people) to act out the story as she reads

Bunny follows after her and does a dramatic reading of the entire script for A Nightmare Before Christmas immediately afterwards, complete with Bright acting out Oogie Boogie badly

No one in town knows who they are but the storyteller is smiling and clapping so they quickly get into it

---

I'm love

It's also done at like, 3am so everyone is either gone to bed or too drunk to follow along

It's actually bunny remembering two stories that maria told badly and thinking they were one thing

I'm gonna go with the people who founded the city arrived in the first winter of the year and so there's a Christmas type holiday then.

And then three moons is kind of a new years thing that is weirdly enough a relic of the ancient cultures that somehow stuck around through everything

I was mostly also kinda doing a Bratum Christmas au but it's nice to have OFFICIAL LORE™

flake is my 'grew up in urban/suburban' insert so he knows All the typical traditions and is like what the fuck are y'all doing, where are the stockings

and Maria's like... on our feet? we wear socks??

#Bratum #rime

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qtsp00k · 3 years ago

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Riffin Over a Santa Sci Fi Flick

When you grow up with 4 television channels entertainment entails elbow grease. So lube up those parietal lobes and join me as I riff over MST3K presents: Santa Clause Conquers the Martians. Not just one martian. Perhaps not, all, of them. Oh I am definitely making toaster dolls. Mars is the most Xmassy planet of them all. They deserve Santa. Red planet. DAMMIT Janet. I do not like these martians, man. I do not like green grease paint hands. Kidnap Santi Clause??? Well that sounds. like a nightmare, before Xmas. Wait! Is Santa just the biggest elf?! Physicality biased hierarchies be Irken me. You there! Pull some levers, PuLL sOmE LeVeRz! Gee, maybe they should grease those. (that shouldn't be a problem) He was lookin for his martian toilet hooch. Musta set it to well done. Torg. Skippy hid there safely for hours, making full use of the facilities, but then reached back into the space toilet and was fried by shoddy circuit work (everything on this ship is shoddy) Suzie has no qualms about Bernie-ing about her brother's charred remains. She's clearly a sociopath. Lil Suzie Socio. Skippy's toast. Once they taste naturally cooked children flesh they'll never enjoy their pyramid nuke box children again. I wish I could decide who lives or dies; there's too many martian names to remember. Say it's cold one more time. Santa will keep us warm. We just need to fashion an ice blade to slice into his bowl full of jelly. I'm sure it's friendly. Don't run or anything. I enlisted specifically so I could harm children. Bah humbug. That door had as much heft as the robots torso. One of these elfs is an inside man! How many elfs do ya think are inside that robot? I'm willing to bet that was the best of the score. Holy hackwork batman. Shoulda sobered up more for this scene. Lookit at em sway. Mrs. Clause can hold her liquor. oh ah do statues arms get tired? Until this moment I've known NO peace, WoMaN! Rudolph the red tipped rocket. A bloaty dead martian? Martianmallows. I feel a recipe coming on. Matcha is green right? Quite humorous, Santa, but your breath is atrocious. Oh good. Pass the flask; Santa needs to swish. Sure, taking food from strangers seems like a swell idea. It doesn't look like cyanide at alllluh. He wants some alone time with Santa's lap. It's ah all in english heh. Munchausen syndrome set it quick with Santa. If you each grab one of my pigtails we won't get separated while we're flying thru space. That's not how space works! Our parents can only afford to give one of us an education. They're being spared from the rest of this movie. Lucky. Careful with those helmets! They cost a whole $10 to make. wiggle wiggle Bites hand. Oh good, Mars didn't have child labor. Just what we always wanted; thanks Santa. These earth kids do look tasty, but they're useful...for now. We're just exhausted and starving. If he tries to climb into the sleigh, we could have ourselves a good old fashioned trampling scene. (drunky got run over by the reindeer) Mars just got their very own drunk mall Santa. I'm impressed Santa's gone this long without a smoke. He thinks this is all a pipe dream. Did Santa scarf down a homing beacon. awright Larry, Moe, and Curly, we get it. Did I say Curly? I meant incompetent. Even if martians are colorblind they should see his skin matcha matches theirs. Prolly at the bar pesterin Gainan. Sexism is lookin pretty sweet right about now. Suzie Secretary isn't on busket duty. Ms. Frizzle is gonna burst thru the wall of kool aid man's stomach any minute now. Why won't someone PLEASE think of the CHILDREN Holdin Santa Clause HO HO hostage. Did they just stuff their hands into one another's arm pits? Oh yeah, air them puppies out. How many bad actors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?? omg he's legit struggleeennn with it. It's pronounced nucular. Bam, whack, right in the kisser. He's faking. He just

wants his prince to wake him. I hope an army of dangerously faulty toys in our future. These martian kids have a lotta repressed rage. Read the room bro. No one likes you! We're gonna probe the snot out of you once you're old enough to breed. As you can see the popualtion of Mars is hopelessly inbred. This crew is our best and brightest. Brightest green maybe. Well they aint no vivid tangerine. Ho Ho. GO already! Thru a slight miscalculation Santa and the kids land on the moon. Oh no, a sequel. Oh! Lyrics. They're uh proud of this... Spelling? Is that allowed? Don't invoke the wrath of Herr Maus. THE END Wasn't that fun. I think we've gotta new xmas classic in the mix. You should hear all the wildly inappropriate jokes I kept to myself. Did reading this make you want to see the film? Do you feel like you've already seen it? Anything you imagine is probably 8 tiny reindeer times better than the film actually is. Or do you just want this 6 minutes of your life back? Let me know in the comments below. And stay tuned for a toaster dolls tutorial and Martianmallows recipe.

#mst3k #santa clause conquers the martians #bad xmas movies #bad christmas movies #retro movies #sci fi santa #bad movies #old sci fi movies #christmas classics #toaster dolls #martians #stoned santa #funny #funny stuff #scope the #invader zim #riff #references

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captawesomesauce · 6 years ago

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8, 10, 11

8. three songs that remind you most of summer and vacation

ooo.. Summer songs... Ok, let's do this. First off, right off the bat, the first song that comes to mind is

Suburban Lawns - "Gidget Goes To Hell" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UPoPhqCMYhg

I'm old enough to actually remember the Gidget show and my older sister LOVED watching it and all those beach musical things.

The Ataris - The Boys of Summer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qt6Lkgs0kiU

Because... ya know...

The Go Gos - Vacation + Lyricshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0fQESUBMwGg

And of course if we're going with Summer/Vacation songs, how can I NOT pick the Go-Gos?!?!

And I know it's only 3 songs, but... since when do I ever play by the rules???

Elvis Costello - The Other Side Of Summer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ww0hN-puTdA

This is a really special song that showcases how much range he has, and the lyrics are so perfectly biting and poignant.

Placebo has 2 summer songs too, Husker Du has Celebrated Summer, Type O Neg had Summer girl and Summer breeze, Deftones My Own Summer, Modest Mouse Summer, The Cure has Snow In Summer and Last Day's of Summer, and Foo Fighters has Summers end. Bravery has the great Swollen Summer, and Bad Lieutenant did Summer Days, but I have to... HAVE TO... include this song:

Bananarama - Cruel Summer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9ml3nyww80

10. three favourite Halloween/spooky songs

Oh ... Shit. LOL. Ok. Let's Do this!

First off, you gotta go with the Misfits... ANY song by the Misfits... even if it's just static, it'd still be the best!

Misfits - Dig Up Her Bones - YouTubehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgSLz5FeXUg

Ministry - Everyday Is Halloween https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFPI9b9N6CQ

because.. Truth!

and for the third... I mean, how do I pick a third? Bauhaus? Boingo? Type O Neg? London after Midnight? Theatre of Tragedy? Killing Joke? NiN? Rob Zombie? Son House's Death Letter Blues? David Bowie's Scary Monsters? Rockwell's Somebody's Watching me? Cranberries Zombies? (RIP) anything off the Nightmare Before Xmas or Lost Highway Soundtracks??? Oooh what about Fred Schneider's Monster??

You know what, I'll go with a song I bet none of you have ever heard...

Love Like blood - Shed Your Skin https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHp-LaLOpw8

Now go listen to all the others too lol

11. three favorite songs from movie or TV series soundtrack

Trainspotting had so many wonderful songs like Iggy Pop's Lust for life, Brian Eno, Primal Scream, Lou Reed, New Order, Pulp, Underworld... so many good things...

I'm going to go with

Underworld - Born Slippy (Nuxx) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XiMrrleH_hI

The Wicker Park Soundtrack has some of the best songs ever, and I can play it a thousand times on repeat. Broken Social Scene, Mum, Mogwai, Mazzy Star, Stereophonics, Postal Service, Snow Patrol, +/- and the Shins are all top tracks but I'm going to go with

Jaime Wyatt - "Light Switch" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Op5AT3Etvs

I love this song so much.

Now for #3.... Do I go with the Big Easy and show of my love of Zydeco?!?! Into the Sun had Mr Pearl Jam himself, Lost Highway has my FAVORITE Smashing Pumpkins song of all time, Eye, Not Another teen Movie had some great 80s songs, and so did the Wedding Singer and Grosse Point Blank. But... I'm going to go with Garden State Soundtrack.

Thievery Corporation, Zero 7, Remy Zero, and the Shins all had some great songs, but the real stand out to me was Colin Hay's track. I always loved Men at Work, and this song is just so great

Colin Hay - I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5J-DtKldpE

#brainsludgemissives

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birdlord · 8 years ago

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What I Watched in 2016

Here are the movies and TV series I watched in 2016, some with commentary and some without. The number after the movies is the date of release, my faves are bolded, and rewatches are marked with as asterisk. Last year’s list!

01 Do I Sound Gay (14)

02 We are The Best! (13)

03 Hateful Eight (15)

04 Welcome to Me (14)

05 For Your Eyes Only (81) - I listened to a lot of back episodes of the James Bonding podcast early this year, which of course led to watching a bunch of Bond movies. Not all, and not in order, certainly.

06 She’s the One (96)

07 * Diamonds are Forever (71)

08 It’s Complicated (09) - I think it was an article about the kitchen design in this movie that led me to watch it?

09 The Natural (84)

10 * Anna Karenina (12) - Never having read the book I can’t REALLY speak to this movie but haha I kinda love its commitment to artifice.

11 About Time (13)

12 What We Do in the Shadows (14) - I did enjoy this, but wasn’t as taken by it as I thought I might be. Found the werewolves the funniest by far, so I wish they’d turned up more often.

13 The Abominable Bride (15) - counting this as a movie, it was the Sherlock xmas special and I recall exactly zero about it, so…..must have been amazing, right?

14 Wake in Fright (71) - Never Go To Australia

15 Hail Caesar (16) - I think I’d have to see it again to determine if the whole thing actually holds together, but at the time, it felt of a piece with the Coen’s cheerier output.

16 In the Heart of the Sea (15)

17 The Night of the Comet (84)

18 Laggies (14)

19 * Bowling for Columbine (02)

20 A Gentleman’s Agreement (47) - confessional, experiential journalism, but done by Cary Grant in the 40s. Ahead of his time/gender?

21 Barefoot in the Park (67)

22 Suddenly Last Summer (59)

23 Tangerine (15)

24 * His Girl Friday (40)

25 That Touch of Mink (62)

26 * Charlie’s Angels (00)

27 9-5 (80) - Holy shit, somehow I thought this movie was just a rah-rah, girl power story about a bunch of secretaries getting together and overthrowing their boss and yeah, that’s SORT OF it but it gets way way weirder in the final third.

28 * Who Framed Roger Rabbit (88)

29 * The Addams Family (91)

30 * Addams Family Values (93)

31 Frida (02)

32 Bridge of Spies (15) - A E I O U and sometimes SPIES :O

33 Swimming With Sharks (94)

34 Sleeping With the Enemy (91)

35 Fatal Attraction (87) - Watched this movie and the previous one as part of an 80s/90s thriller weekend. These two are an interesting contrast to one another, being as the first is about an abusive husband and the second focuses on the most notable example of the “crazy ex-girlfriend”.

36 1 Cloverfield Lane (16)

37 The Man Who Never Was (56)

38 * To Die For (95) - This was a super fave of Teen Emily, who definitely identified with the Lydia character. Watching this time was a huge reminder than Illeana Douglas is a goddamn national treasure.

39 Trouble In Paradise (32)

40 Eraser (96)

41 * Flashdance (83)

42 * Notting Hill (99)

43 Gone to Earth (50) - Not the best Powell and Pressburger out there, but one takes what one can get, right?

44 Holiday Camp (47)

45 Never Sleep Again (10) - This is a four-hour doc about the entire Nightmare on Elm St series, and is the reason I watched Freddy’s Revenge a couple of movies down the list. It’s not a series that I have a particular attachment to, so I learned a ton.

46 Clouds of Sils Maria (15)

47 Mommie Dearest (81) - I’m not sure that I have enough appreciation for high camp to really get into this. There were some moments, but overall it’s a fine example of the kind of thing that is Not For Me.

48 Nightmare on Elm St: Freddy’s Revenge (85)

49 Inside Man (06)

50 Trainwreck (15)

51 White God (14)

52 * Sleepwalk With Me (12)

53 Amy (15)

54 * Meatballs (79)

55 Everybody Wants Some!! (16) - I found this a huge disappointment, and I’ve been a bit mystified by its positive reviews and inclusion on critics’ end of year lists. While D&C definitely has a “main character”, and we do follow him and his friends, other people and subsets of the high school are given serious time and consideration. Ultimately, I don’t think following this one dude tripping through a bunch of different college subsets was as illuminating. Plus, weak jokes.

56 * Dazed & Confused (93) - had to cleanse the mind-palate by watching the original!

57 Summertime (55)

58 The Money Pit (86)

59 Zombeavers (14)

60 Mistress America (15) - I am finding Greta Gerwig more and more charming, the more I see of her. Greta, let’s be friends!

61 While We’re Young (14)

62 The Invitation (16) - quite effective, very upper-middle-class bohemian LA horror film. I’ve heard some complaints about the final scene, but I thought it was an effective & clever way to show an expanding scope without an extra expense or sets.

63 End of Days (99)

64 Escape From New York (81)

65 Escape from L.A. (96) - Watched these two together, on the same night. They definitely should NOT be watched that way, given how identical the plots are. Unbelievably terrible ’96-era CGI in the second one, hard to believe that Jurassic Park was three years previous?? Gotta get that Spielberg money, am I right?

66 High Rise (16) - my only real disappointment in this movie was not being around to see the decline of the civilization - we jump straight from things being fine (if weird) and everything gone to heck. My favourite part is the decline, give me decline!

67 The Great Outdoors (88)

68 * Catch Me If You Can (02)

69 Little Darlings (80) - just your classic losing-virginity-at-camp story, but…wait for it….with GIRLS.

70 * Good Will Hunting (97)

71 Popstar (16) - diminishing returns, but some funny bits (mostly in the songs, not surprisingly).

72 Tarzan (16) - watched this with friends and relatives, at a drive-in theatre a couple of days after my wedding! It’s NOT a good movie, but it was a fun time.

73 Love & Friendship (16) - got completely obsessed with Tom Bennett based on his 100% rate of scene-stealing in this film. Sevigny feels utterly out of place - am I capable of seeing her in a period piece set before, say, 1975 without feeling weird about it?

74 The Night Before (15)

75 Ghostbusters (16) - So I know I was supposed to be charmed by Kate McKinnon, but her schtick just doesn’t work on me, for whatever reason. I was also really frustrated by the final fight scene of this movie - it had obviously been hacked up in editing, and wtf is up with punching ghosts instead of containing them? I’m glad this movie happened, and certainly a great deal of the criticism it came in for was deeply unfair, but it was distinctly disappointing to find that this movie just wasn’t that great.

76 Brooklyn (15)

77 Poltergeist (82)

78 * Before Sunrise (95)

79 Love & Basketball (00) - Effusive praise for this movie somehow came to my attention from all over the place this year, so I finally had to watch it.

80 The Man Who Knew Too Much (56)

81 * Road House (89)

82 Carol (15) - watching this FINALLY allowed me to fully participate in Today’s Meme Culture

83 * Out of Sight (98)

84 Happy Texas (99)

85 Red Rock West (93)

86 Weiner Dog (15)

87 The Trouble With Harry (55)

88 * When Harry Met Sally (89)

89 Jungle Fever (91)

90 Ocean’s 11 (01)

91 Star Trek Beyond (16)

92 Two For the Road (67)

93 * Seven Year Itch (55)

94 Maggie’s Plan (15) - like I said earlier about Greta Gerwig? I liked this one even more than Mistress.

95 The Dish (00)

96 Splash (84)

97 Desk Set (57) - watching this and the next were inspired by stumbling across a blog about depictions of librarians on film. I particularly hit on this one because I’ve always wanted to see a Hepburne/Tracy film, and never had (to my memory, anyhow).

98 Party Girl (95) - one of those movies I’d always noticed on the shelves at the video store, and never actually watched it.

99 * Young Frankenstein (74) - saw this in the theatre, Gene Wilder notwithstanding I…..don’t think it’s good. It’s only extremely intermittently funny, you guys! Plus, the Putting’ on the Ritz bit makes me uncomfortable (especially in audio-only form, which I heard TOO many times after Wilder died).

100 The House of the Devil (09)

101* The Witches of Eastwick (87)

102 The Borning (81)

103 * Shaun of the Dead (04)

104 Dolores Claiborne (95)

105 The Conjuring 2 (13)

106 In a Valley of Violence (16) - definitely watched this because I happened across an article about the movie’s dog star.

107 The Witch (16) - very effective in getting across the supernatural, natural, and social dangers of early puritan America, and Black Philip has entered my idiolect for any creepy animal/person/twitter feed.

108 * Wayne’s World (92)

109 What if (13) - riffs on When Harry Met Sally’s fundamental question of women and men being friends, and basically comes to the same conclusion. yawn.

110 The Martian (15) - I read the book as part of a book club last year, and finally got around to watching the film. Since I found the worst of the writing in the book to be those passages dealing with description, the movie was a lot less annoying to experience.

111 Sleepless in Seattle (93)

112 * Thelma & Louise (91)

113 Casino (95)

114 Other People (16) - wept several times. GOSH I love Jesse Plemons, he’s so hugely sympathetic. Would watch in virtually anything.

115 The Life & Death of Colonel Blimp (43)

116 Primary Colors (98)

117 Edge of Seventeen (16)

118 *Die Hard (88) - loaded up the laptop with this and the next four xmas-set movies, for watching on planes and in airports, while we were on the road at christmastime.

119 *Batman Returns (92)

120 *Scrooged (88)

121 * The Apartment (60)

Theatre - 5

Drive-in - 1

All the rest at home or at friends’ homes!

TV SERIES

*The Office US S2-3

War & Peace (2016) - you bet your BOOTS I started the book after watching this. Did I finish it? Not even close.

Love (2016)

Better Call Saul S2 - this is a show I enjoy while I’m watching it, but I don’t particularly find it memorable. Why? Who knows. It’s still something I look forward to, but not a show that sticks with me.

Great British Bake off *S1, *S2, S7 + Xmas Specials - a eulogy for Bake-Off as it was. Pour one (pint of double cream, that is) out for what once was.

Broad City S5

Travel Man S1, S2 - I find Richard Ayoade so desperately charming, but ever time I’ve watched one of the movies he’s directed, I’ve ended up disappointed. This show is a bit hit or miss, depending on the guests he brings along, and the episodes definitely have a sameness to them, but if you find this guy even a sliver as entertaining as I do, it’ll pull you along anyhow.

The Night Manager - so looking forward to Hugh Laurie’s upcoming career phase as Bond Villain.

Cooked

Newsradio S1-S3 - I’d seen an episode or two of this over the years but never sat down to fully appreciate it. It’s making me miss Phil Hartman all over again, a fresh devastation, plus haha did u know Tone Loc plays a security guard on this show? It’s all true.

Lady Dynamite

OJ Made In America - I’ll count this as a series, since I didn’t watch it in the theatre. Still haven’t seen the other big OJ series of 2016, but I loved loved LOVED this. What impressed me the most is that, in spite of its 7 hour+ running time there were still aspects of this story that could have been expanded upon.

Silicon Valley S3

* Veep S1, S2

Catastrophe S2

Pulling - went back in time to get more Sharon Horgan in my life, since Catastrophe seasons are terribly short and far-between. I’d been aware of this show for a long time, and somehow wasn’t expecting it to be as near-devastating as it ended up being. What, did I forget what a British show was like?

Another Period S2

Difficult People S1, S2 - Another late discovery, but a great one. A fine example of just giving some funny people a show, and letting them just do their thing on it every week.

Fleabag - yes, I’m in for this, obviously. And if I wasn’t, the show designed itself to put me off, from the first moments. A wise move!

One Mississippi

Very British Problems S1, S2

Atlanta - I’ve got a bad feeling that this show’s deserved success will lead to surreal elements being deployed, but much less deftly than they were here.

Please Like Me S1-S4 - Tore through this entire series greedily, am now suffering until they make another season. Balances some very harrowing elements with comedy and an ensemble cast of loveable/terrible humans.

Divorce - Sharon Horgan’s writing minus her acting is a hollow empty shell, but hey, I’ll take what I can get, when I can get it.

The Fall S3 - I’d decided last year after S2 that I was done with this show, and yet, here we are, I was drawn back in.

The Crown

Insecure

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