#I am the lack of flavor factor

[pure-mornings]

british cuisine is the no 1 reason I’d not want to live there. with how boring fish n chips is what the fuck did they eat before

say what you will about the British they went off with fish and chips.

[robolvrr]

Hi I just finished reading your Pharma fic and I must ask for more like this but maybe some more torture? If that makes you uncomfortable then feel free to not do it!

debt collector. *. * ·

pharma x reader warnings: nsfw. mentions of medical torture. dark content. a back-alley doctor of all trades gives you deals too good to be true.

three knocks.

do you have a death wish?

the silence makes you wince. this night is bitter and your nose is ruddy, two moons overhung in the black beauty sky. gloved hands gingerly rub for friction, last ditch effort to gain some comfort. you know once this rusted door slides open, you won't be at ease and he will be there, watchful as a vulture's vice.

there should be no surprise when your miracle doctor is summoned, though you suppose the sizable difference in height and build is a factor. his smirk is a permanent fixture and what he lacks in pupils he offers in personal intrusions, crowding you inside with a croon of baritone greetings.

several mechanisms relock themselves. the mask covering the lower half of your face rolls down your chin, his colossus hands so precise, so tender, slipping your limbs free of a winter coat.

"my favorite patient. i do hope those.. prescriptions i've suggested you have been doing the trick."

originally, you had come here for the medical services. simple check-ins, an health examination every once in awhile. his rates were cheap and you had no insurance, so knowing a cybertronian of all things - billions and billions of years old no doubt with just as much field knowledge - quelled most of your concerns.

most of them.

pharma was an interesting mech. if he were a man, you're sure you'd fumble your tongue more. he has a funny way of getting you to agree with him.

"dear. i do adore our shared moments of silence just like any other, but i asked a question. how else am i to know my efficiency if you get all shy on me, mm?"

his grin tears some more seeing you squirm, mumbling an apology and turning your head as if he won't catch the warmth on your cheeks in the opposing mirror.

"sorry, pharma. to be honest.."

"yeees?" pharma sounds like he knows exactly what is bothering you.

"the medications.. they've been making me anxious. i think. i see things more than usual out of the corner of my eyes. i hear a thump and suddenly my heart is racing."

"no better than an alley cat, it seems." a grumble leaves your pout and he, still smiling wide and knowing, tuts in false concern.

"doctor, please. i know you told me these methods of yours were experimental. i'm organic. our biology is different, at its core. but i just need to sleep. that's all i need."

"all you need?"

his digit slips something gritty and round in your mouth. you swallow like the good patient you are, even though the flavor cakes your throat and makes you gag. it helps when he cups your throat, tickling the column of your neck.

he has such a way with touch. you forget you're frustrated.

"yes. i just want to sleep."

with a note of finality, his servos clap together, urging you to stay still. it may have been a few minutes, or hours, though it's unclear. there are no clocks down here. your head feels so heavy.

with a thunk, you are falling and with a grandiose hum, he is catching, placing you atop his table like a frankenstein doll.

sluggish muscles make way for well-crafted pins. acupuncture just edging discomfort, or is the fuzziness at the trim of your blank expression a sign of the end?

"then sleep you shall."

his voice echoes loud and glorious. an angel's choir - an angel of death.

the drilling pain kisses you again, fleets. you whimper, but he doesn't miss the jolt of your legs, or the shaky breath you gift his audials.

"i can gift you peace, sleeping beauty. i promise. however.. the subject of payment has been on the table for too long. i must collect."

schlick.

squishy and wet. hardness swelling where it shouldn't, nestled in your praising stare. lashes graze metal.

"speechless? you'll feel better after, sweet thing." in a corner of your mind dozens of atmospheres away, your sense of survival is thrashing in fear. it is not strong enough to pierce this hypnotic veil.

"in fact, you won't feel much at all."

pnk!

-

this room is warm and this table is cold and his hands, his hands, so big and perfect and familiar.

pharma's thumb slowly drags up along your cheek, before escaping back into his intake for him to taste-test. you think wearily that it's bright and tangy, just like the hues of his opulent frame.

"that's it. sink."

you smile.

a/n: thanks for the request! if i did get into darker stuff, like descriptive gore, i'd end up making a sideblog. also a giant prose writer so i like to leave things to the minds eye so to speak. if you can't tell, pharma and his versions of "romance" aren't sweet. will u match his freak? ;)

[flfverse]

hihi this might be a stupid question but I thought I’d ask anyways: did you come up with the bdsm AU?

If not, do you have any fic recs with the same ‘verse?👀

If you did, do you have plans to write more fics in the same verse, outside of the ones you’ve written?

Sorry if this is overstepping at all, I just adore this AU and am a curious fellow🙈 No pressure to answer🫶

not overstepping! i am also a curious fellow, and you’ve given me an opportunity to Talk History.

see, i did not come up with the BDSM AU, but i’ve read it for years and became fascinated with how people played with it. i love fandom history, so i eventually started to wonder where it came from and how it evolved.

the first BDSM AU was written by Xanthe (who has a website you can read all her stuff on, xanthe.com, and it also has an faq about her original world, super interesting) back in 2006. now, it’s possible that other people independently came up with a similar idea earlier than this (indeed, theres an early 2000s fantasy book series with a Vaguely similar premise), but everything i’ve ever found cites Xanthe as the first to do it in fandom and the one to popularize it, so we’re going with that.

the fic series was Stargate: Atlantis fic (john/rodney, for those familiar) with the basic premise of “alternate universe where being bisexual and kinky is the default.” no biological factor! just a different balance of sexualities. i only read part of the very first fic because they’re quite long and i don’t all the way jive with Xanthe’s writing style, so take this with a cup of salt, but they also lacked the dystopian edge many of the modern fics have. let’s be honest—like many fic tropes, it was mostly an excuse to write smut :P.

now, while Xanthe was quite a big name, and did have people spinning off and writing their own versions of her world, it might not have gone anywhere was it not for Helenish. Helenish took issue with Xanthe’s spin on the world and thought that she hadn’t fully explored the worldbuilding potential. she wrote Take Clothes Off As Directed, which i’ve recced on this blog and in the notes of Free Falling, because it is PHENOMENAL. it kept Xanthe’s premise and used it to explore a sexism allegory, very very similar to my stuff and other current popular BDSM AUs.

people began writing in Helenish’s ‘verse, some minor drama broke out between the two writers and their followers (presumably minor—much of this happened on Livejournal, which famously and tragically had many accounts wiped in 2007-2008, especially accounts that posted queer stuff or nsfw stuff or, in cases like these, both. so it’s difficult to figure out what exactly was happening in fandom around then, especially if you’re me and never used LJ and don’t know how to effectively navigate it)

annnyway, the thing took off, made its way to other fandoms, more and more people wrote their own versions, etc. over time, people began combining it with Omegaverse fics, since the two are pretty similar; when those fusions were pulled apart later, they affected one another; this is where BDSM AUs became more biology-flavored, and where we get certain Omegaverse tropes like “omega drop.”

if it wasn’t obvious, i’ve done a lot of looking into this, and i hope to do more soon and eventually put all that info to good use in some form of project—not sure what yet. i’m also not at allll biased between Xanthe and Helenish…..genuinely, Xanthe did a good thing and wrote a LOT of influential fic, we’re just…very different writers.

but ANYWAY, yeah, definitely not my idea, i’m building on the backs of thousands of writers before me. and it’s awesome.

i DO have a fic rec list somewhere on this blog, but i’m actually in the process of updating it! the goal is to get around 40-50 fics on there and i’m pretty close, so keep an eye out (it’s just taking a long time because i have to read fics to know if they’re good enough to rec….and then i just read fanfic for 6 hours….and then i reread some of them because they’re just really good….)

not sure what you mean by the third question—i don’t currently have any plans to write an AU outside of FLFverse, like a different fandom or plot or anything. i’ve thrown around the idea of what i affectionately call the SLSverse (that’s “seems like soaring,” get it, synonyms?), which would be what-ifs or AUs of the AU, but not its own thing.

within FLFverse, yes, i plan to write more fic XD. 2024 has been the roughest for my writing since probably 2019, which really sucks, but what can ya do. in truth, when i started writing Free Falling and Cross the Line and all those in fall 2023, i was hours from home/friends, unemployed, borderline flunking college, and like, big depressed—i had a ton of free time! and FLFverse was approximately the only thing i cared about. now i’m home again and have a job and am doing More Okay at school (academia and i are not friends), and i have other big fun projects to split my time between. i’m pretty determined to at least finish FF, even if it takes me another 10 years, and along the way i’ll write whatever oneshots strike my fancy.

so, yeah! that’s what’s up. thanks for the ask and giving me an excuse to yap about this AU <3

[tobiasdrake]

Okay, here we go. It's time to give a new game a go. I've had a lot of people pushing for this one so I'm excited.

I realize those are supposed to be rays of light shining off of whatever the thing is - a star, presumably - but it honestly looks like it's shooting at me. Should I be concerned?

I bet it tastes like lemon. It looks lemon-flavored to me. Though that might just be the black-and-white color scheme.

Hey. Uh. Pro tip, don't stand directly over someone's face when you're wearing a dress. There are better angles you can approach from.

Fortunately for you, I am a, uh... I am a....

...

You know what, I just woke up and I do not have sufficient information at this time to describe myself as "gentleman", "lady", or "person of esteemed character". I will get back to you when I have gathered more information as to my personal gender situation.

Yeah, sorry, I'm coming down from a wild trip. The kind where you can't be 100% sure if the things you just did caused the hallucinations or were part of the hallucinations. I think I actually saw the curvature of time.

It's a serrated crescent. I don't know what to do with that information. But I have it now.

Thank you, I feel like I will be able to hold more coherent conversations when I am more fully awake. And possibly caffeinated. If that is a thing we have.

FUCKING OW

I'M AWAKE

Ugh, that's like rolling over in just the wrong way so that your whole leg cramps up and then you have to throw yourself out of bed and walk on it to make the unbelievably agonizing pain go away. I GUESS I'M DONE BEING ASLEEP NOW.

There we go, information gathered. I have consulted the pocket notes I wrote to explain my gender to me and arrived at a conclusive answer: Masc-leaning non-binary.

Now that this mystery has been settled, I'm ready to face the day.

Well, the maybe/maybe-not hallucinations were fantastic but then it ended in violent agony so I'm gonna say that balances out to a 5.

You are alarmingly invested in my naptime quality. Are you trying to hint that you want me to go away for a couple more hours?

I dunno; I kinda just ruined my appetite for bedtime and I don't want to be that one person in the group who keeps trying to talk for hours and keeps everyone else awake.

Plus we're supposed to go fight the big bad evil guy in the morning and that might not be an appointment that we can show up to sleep-deprived. He might take offense.

Then again, we might be able to intimidate him with our cavalier attitudes and complete lack of regard for the severity of this situation.

OH NO

I didn't mean no! I just meant... we should really consider all the factors first!

...

I might be history's greatest monster.

...ugggggggh how did this become my problem.

Why does Odile get to be a Madame? I want to be a Madame. Super unfair that she gets the cool title and I'm just... uh....

SIFFRIN. I'm just Siffrin. Unfair.

If we're all staying in the same place then what's even the point of calling it a sleepo-- I MEAN I AM DOWN AND VERY ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT YOUR SLEEPOVER IDEA YES THIS IS A WONDERFUL PLAN.

...

...

...

*quietly shuffles pocket notes back into pocket*

My memory is fine. Perfectly adequate.

OH THANK YOU I wanted one but I was too machismo to ask. You're always looking out for me, Mar... Merma....

Mirabelle! You're always looking out for me, Mirabelle. I appreciate it. ^_^

Now then. We have a fulfilling day ahead of us! Time to carry out the task I was assigned wander aimlessly around the village pokin' stuff.

[thewhumpcaretaker]

Top 5 favorite john wick ships⁉️⁉️

Omg the asks are coming so fast um um um

John x Helen. The OGs. Love itself personified to the extent that it's almost religious. They will find each other in every lifetime and they are bound to each other by a power that reshapes international political systems and outshines the powers of death. The sweetest domme and most devoted sub that ever lived. They're brought together by blood transfusions, bullet wounds, and the complete lack of any familial support system. If they're getting whumped, they're getting whumped at the same time because they're soul mates that can feel each other's emotions even beyond the grave (this is Broken Veil lore). The flavor of the whump is honey and that's what they call each other. Fun fact: I literally, irl had to quit writing about them because I stopped sleeping, oops.

John x Vincent. Churchduel sends my brain into immediate overdrive. I am thinking about it all of the time. Sometimes, I try to think other thoughts, and Churchduel thoughts assert themselves out of the ether instead. Unconditional love and impossible levels of redemption. Throw your punitive justice out the window to prove you're not a cop, we came to cum and it WILL save him. Actually healthy underneath it all because this is secretly an NPD/cluster B positivity story about how a narc can have a healthy relationship with proper accommodations. The flavor of this whump is strawberry and it is mixed with so much cocaine. I NEED Vincent and he needs so much help. Kiss this sad wet cat!!! Kiss him now, John, with tongue!!!!!!

John x Santino. I can't think about them without my heart fluttering. I feel their love for each other inside my own body. They are pure entities of angst and hurt/comfort, to the extent that I can write endless drabble and ficlets about them which I don't normally do. They don't even require context, Santino is just distilled clinginess and need while John is distilled comfort and they just produce an outpouring of gentleness as John helps Santino heal and Riccardo Scamarcio's pronounced eye bags haunt my daydreams (I swear to god, there is never a time when this man looks like he's had a full night of sleep and I think that's just his face. What a face <3). The flavor of this whump is coffee and cigarettes, and the whumperflies make me feel like I'm passing out.

John x Caine. It is a goal of mine to get feral about John x Caine. That one GIF of Caine saying "are you dead John?" and looking like his heart just shattered is buried in my brain, waiting to blossom. Also the fic with the head pats. THE HEAD PATS. And the wet spot induced by the head pats...I can't. I'm dead. People should please send me John x Caine asks, I need to figure out how to write them so I can dive into this because there's so much potential. Their whump flavor remains a mystery and I need to know. I'm getting hints of something slow and ponderous and gentle, perhaps a relaxing tea?

Vincent x Chidi. Let's be honest: Beyond Judgement could just happen with Chidi instead under slightly different circumstances. The point is for there to be a bodyguard who will do anything for Vincent and love him unconditionally like daddy didn't. Chidi might not offer that enemies to lovers factor, but he could absolutely bring out the best in Vincent. He's the one person in the world who is canonically there for Vicent and doesn't want him to die alone and forgotten. Also I spent the better part of today thinking about that Vincent web weaving image set and how much I want there to be someone there to prevent Vincent's tragic fall

Bonus:

Jude x no one. Get it Jude. Live your best aroace life and whip some folks platonically. I'm spinning you in my brain anyway.

[actualrealvampire]

Can you describe the taste of each blood type and what makes them different from each other?

Yes, I can. O+ has a slightly richer, deeper flavor. All blood tastes metallic, but O+ the most so.

O- is milder, a little less complex, more agreeable. A little bitter, like dark chocolate.

A is sort of silky. It’s smoother, lighter. A little less metallic tasting.

B is a kind of lighter, brighter flavor. It has a different type of metallic to it.

AB is more complex, it has a sort of zest to it, almost tangy. Like A and B are juices separately but nectar when combined.

There are other factors that affect the taste of your blood as well. If you eat a lot of fruit or things with natural sugars, your blood is a bit sweeter (I like this, personally.) if you drink a lot of alcohol your blood will taste slightly alcoholic. Like a wine. If you take a lot of different medications, especially ‘zoloft’ it gives your blood a weird taste. I do not know how to describe it other than weird. If you are diabetic, your blood will taste sweet in a slightly unpleasant way, like accidentally adding too much sugar to your coffee. Some people, but not all, who have very high blood pressure or cholesterol have slightly salty tasting blood. (I kind of like this, but only in small amounts) it can be a little bit like drinking soy sauce. If you’re anemic, your blood lacks a certain metallic flavor, but it also lacks a certain depth and is slightly… stale tasting. And if you smoke, your blood tastes bad. It tastes like the nicotine smell, and has an unpleasant and noticeable staleness.

Over the years I have tasted many different liquids to be able to compare different types of blood to them. I am still a man of science at my core, after all. I’m glad doing so has useful applications.

[jamesisinniagara]

Update #5 on Jim's Old-Fashioned Oat Bars

What is working?

Positive Feedback from Existing Customers: Loyal customers continue to praise the oat bars for their taste and quality, which reaffirms the product's appeal.

Consistent Branding: The authentic and homemade identity of the bars remains a strong selling point, resonating well with the community.

What is not working?

Sluggish Sales This Week: Sales were unexpectedly low, highlighting the need for stronger marketing and outreach efforts to maintain momentum.

Limited Market Reach: The challenge of expanding to new locations persists, and the lack of widespread exposure might be contributing to the dip in sales.

How do I feel the project is coming?

While the slow sales week was discouraging, I’m viewing it as a temporary setback and an opportunity to reassess strategies. The journey of building a business is proving to be as much about resilience as it is about passion.

What am I learning about running a business?

Importance of Consistent Marketing: Even when sales are steady, consistent outreach is crucial to keep the brand visible and attract new customers.

Value of Diversified Channels: Exploring avenues like online sales, pop-up events, or subscription boxes could help mitigate slow periods and expand reach.

Tracking Seasonal Trends: Keeping an eye on customer habits and seasonal factors might provide insights into slow weeks and help with forecasting.

What am I learning about myself?

Patience and Persistence: This week reminded me that progress isn't always linear, and staying motivated during tough times is essential.

Problem-Solving Under Pressure: I’m honing my ability to adapt quickly and brainstorm creative solutions to challenges like low sales and limited exposure.

Renewed Focus on Creativity: I’m discovering that experimenting with new ideas—whether it’s a promotion, a new flavor, or a collaboration—can reignite energy and enthusiasm for the business.

[evolutionsvoid]

Not really sure if you could qualify this as an entry, more like a ramble or daydream. Doesn't matter, writing it anyway. I am here in the freezing north, hunkering down in my makeshift snow cave as a blizzard runs rampant outside. The wind hasn't stopped howling for days it seems, and the snow is coming down so hard that the air is just solid white. Can't get research done in this, can't even leave my shelter! Just stuck here until it finally blows over, but there is no telling how long that will take. Working on staying warm through all of this, but thankfully I got enough gear to keep myself from freezing. The unfortunate part I am dealing with right now is that the menu is a tad lacking here. I brought provisions with me on this trek, since I can't always count on hunting for food. They have done me well so far, but the days have depleted my stock and the storm prevents me from getting something fresher. Dried meats are not the worst, they just get quite samey. The good stuff has all been eaten, so I am just left picking at what remains, bland and basic it may be. Of course I got plenty of lichens collected, which means I can survive a good long while on Crust Soup, but I shudder at that thought. Rather start eating the snow then choke down that wretched sludge. Gnawing on practically frozen jerky makes my brain and stomach yearn for the foods of home, wishing I was there to scarf down an entire pantry's worth. Every miserable bite brings to mind the delectable treats and hearty feasts found in a dryad kitchen, and it honestly isn't helping things here. That is why I am going to write about them now, to try and get these things out of my head and onto paper. Maybe my idle scribbling will distract me, and I will look up from my journal to find the storm gone. Eh, probably not, but lets go for it anyway. There are plenty of plants and fungi that can be found in a dryad's kitchen and garden, so lets see what we can think of! 1. Rind Berries - One of the foods that shows the dryad way of reusing and recycling, as we find ways to get more nutrients out of the things most people throw away. To be truthful, Rind "Berries" are not really berries. They aren't even plants. They are a type of blobby mold that grows on discarded fruit shells and rinds. Once you have eaten the good parts of a harvest, take all the discard pieces and pile them onto the compost. You want to have it on top, so that the mold can properly form and that you can better harvest it. In time, these clusters will form on the decaying rinds, and you can pluck them off for one last treat! Delightfully squishy, you could eat them all day! The best part is that their flavor changes depending on what fruits and rinds they grow on, so there are so many options! Anytime I visit a shop that specially grows them, I always find new flavors and combinations to try. I have heard humans don't like them so much, as they look too close to the usual berries they eat. They say that they get fooled into thinking they are going to be eating a blackberry or raspberry, and then get thrown off by the pungent savory flavor of this juicy mold.     2. Blaze Tip - Sometimes called "Fire Arrows," these are a special pepper that get their name from their pointed shape. They are often compared to spear tips or arrowheads, especially since they are indeed sharp at the end! Their undulating fruits grow upward, forming a pointed tip that can actually break skin. This is meant to ward off herbivores, making them painful to eat, especially when you factor in their spicy juices! The insides build up reserves of the liquid, which then shoot out when the fruit is squeezed or the tip punctures flesh. This injects the spiciness right into their foe, and is quite the shock for those trying to eat them! However, we have found this defense mechanism to be quite tasty, and a great way to add a spicy flare to a dish. By plucking one of the peppers off and jabbing them into a hunk of meat or vegetable, you fill it with that invigorating heat that will perk up any diner! Oh, they are just perfect combined with a big juicy grub! Fill that larvae with spice and pop them right into your mouth. That will get you going for sure! If you are planning on consuming the whole pepper or chopping it up to add to soup, be sure to remove the pointy end. Dinner ain't the same when you stab yourself in the mouth.     3. Noodle Trees - Not exactly a tree, it is actually a fungus, but it still is delicious! Grows long stringy strands that were meant to help produce and spread spores, but now are grown to make something similar to noodles. Just cut them off when they reach the right length and add it to whatever dish you want. It is important to keep these fungi properly trimmed, though, even if you aren't planning to eat them. They were bred to constantly grow these strands, even past their natural limits. If left to grow out too long, they tend to rot or can even smother the fungus under their sheer weight. So shear them off, toss them onto a plate with sauce and grubs, and enjoy! 4. Honey Bottles - Here is a plant that every dryad knows from the day they first emerge from the soil. Honey Bottles (or Nectar Pods) are what every sapling is raised on in their early days, until their stomachs properly grow in and can handle more solid foods. As with pretty much every plant and fungus on this list, dryads have selectively bred and grown this species over time to get them to the point they are now. Honey Bottles form these large pods that are filled to bursting with sweet nutritious nectar, loaded with everything a sapling needs to grow big and strong (but of course they still need plenty of sun and soil)! If any household has saplings or are expecting one, it is guaranteed that this plant will be in their gardens or homes. You want plenty on hand, because the little ones are a hungry bunch! Thankfully, these plants are pretty hardy and are easy to maintain. And when it is time to eat, all you need to do is pluck a ripe pod off, bite off the tip and let your hungry little sapling drink their fill. Of course, honey bottles can be used for other things, not just feeding the young. Their sweet nectar can be used as an ingredient for baking or cooking, and tends to show up in a lot of dessert recipes. Some folk whip it up into a wonderful frosting for cakes and other treats! Some add the sweetness to some more basic dishes, especially with young ones at the dinner table. The one drawback to having honey bottles be the perfect food for saplings is that they get a love for sweets and have a hard time trying other things! So sometimes a little dab of nectar is needed to help expand the palate.

  5. Weeping Citron - A citrus fruit that gets its name from how the juices drip from the ends of its tendril-like growths, and also referring to what people do when they get their first taste of its sour flesh. Weeping Citron can be eaten as it is (for those able to handle the flavor), or added to juice drinks and recipes, but it shows up in dryad kitchens a lot for another reason. A thing I feel I should mention to my non-dryad readers is that dryads do not normally cook with fire. Dryads and fire are things that have not mixed well in the past, and the element can be dangerous to our homes and beloved forests. This means that fire is not a thing normally present in our day to day lives, thus we aren't used to handling it. Does that mean any dryad will run screaming at the slightest flame? No. Dryads are not deathly terrified of fire, we are just very wary of it and don't have a lot of experience with it. I am quite comfortable with the element, as I make campfires, but there is still some unease. But even if a dryad was fully capable of working with fire, there is a high chance their home is not. Obviously, dryad houses aren't built with fireplaces, or areas where a cooking flame can be lit, thus we cannot use it. We do have dryad bakeries and restaurants that utilize flame, but they were specially built to harness and contain this element. So in the end, this means a lot of our food and dishes are served at room temperature, as there is no flame to cook or boil. While our stomachs can handle rawer food than humans can, breaking down tough meats and vegetables makes digestion much easier. This is where the Weeping Citron comes in. Its highly acidic juices can be used on meat to break it down and make it easier to eat. All one had to do is rip off a tendril of the fruit and squeeze out the fluid into a container. Then you add the flesh and let it soak, giving time for the acid to eat away at it. I have heard that some humans use this cooking method as well, so perhaps this concept is a familiar one to you. However, I am sure most humans are used to dishes being served piping hot, which is one of the major differences between dryad and human cuisine. It certainly takes some getting used to for both sides, but once you figure that out, there is a whole world of delicious foods to try! Believe me, I am always sure to try out the local cuisine wherever I go! Makes me wish I was researching food right now instead of this...   6. Clutter Stalk - I swear this fungus was called a "Cluster Stalk," but I keep seeing it be written as "Clutter." Could it be a regional thing, or did I just make that up? No clue. Anyways, this fungus is known for its CLUSTERS of harden spore pods that are meant to be eaten and dispersed by animals. The spores within are able to survive the digestive process and then are deposited with in a healthy load of feces. I am sure that probably spoiled some appetites talking about that, but that is just how the fungus starts. The rest of its growth process relies on regular soil nutrients, and thus poop is no longer in play here. When it starts to fruit, it forms these CLUSTERS which we harvest and eat. Taste good on their own, or add them to a soup! If you are giving them to saplings to eat, best serve them in a bowl. Poor coordination with a fork will send these things flying everywhere, which is messy enough when done by accident. The little ones find it quite fun playing with these things, using them more as toys than food. Also, humans seem to always make comments about this fungus, referring to its peculiar appearance. Some would say this is noteworthy, but I honestly feel they have these jokes or "observations" about practically any plant or fungus. Yes, they look weird and resemble certain somethings, but when you say that about everything it is hard to take seriously. They say similar stuff about us too! You wouldn't believe what I have heard them say whenever they see small dryad effigies... 7. Climbing Eyes - When in their natural state, the name probably doesn't make sense to people. Red fruits on a vine, where does the "eye" part come in? When these fruits grow ripe, though, that is when the answer reveals itself. They will begin to swell and the crimson shell will crack open, revealing white flesh beneath. With a darkened pit in the center, ringed by the pale meat, the fruit takes on the appearance of eyeballs. It gives quite the look during the growing season, with vines of eyes clinging to the trees! When ripe, the fruits have a tart, refreshing flavor, lovely as a snack or turned into juice. They also can be heated up, which causes the flesh to rapidly expand and turn into a large spongy puff! We call them "Eye Poppers," and we can make them without fire by simply roasting them next to a Heat Cage. Humans like to call these plants "Dryad Eyes," and joke that these are where our eyes are, which I personally don't get. Why do they keep up with this odd prank, acting like they can't see our eyes? It's bewildering.   8. Tarwood - The fruits and nuts of plants aren't the only things we eat, as the Tarwood tree shows. This tree is known for its extremely sticky bark, which traps and kills insects and other critters. This is meant to secure the species more nutrients, and protect it from parasites and herbivores. The combination of crisp bark and sticky fluids, though, cannot be passed up. Since the tree grows this bark in thick, shaggy strips, one can peel off pieces without causing too much damage. Careful harvesting keeps the tree healthy, and results in a bunch of gooey bark laden with bug treats! You can snap into this bark as is, or crumble it up and sprinkle it on a salad or other dish. Glue on your own insects and pieces to personalize the flavor! It is a fun snack for saplings, as they can decorate the bark with a variety of bugs, nuts and seeds. Art you can eat!     9. Gall Candy - Not really a specific species to this one, but they do fare better with the more brighter and colorful ones. Everyone knows how galls can form on plants, be it by insects, parasites or disease. In most cases, these are problems (especially if the plant they are growing on is you), but some of them can have their uses. If you get the galls that are formed by insects laying their eggs in them, then you got the start of something tasty. Have that plant swell up into a big ball, and then pull it off. What you get is a crunchy treat with a surprise in the middle! Add a candy coating or a dip into honey, and you got yourself some Gall Candy! Some you crunch down on in one go, while others you suck on to enjoy that sweet flavor. If one looks to grow and sell these, best find a species that makes real colorful galls, as those are the ones that catch the eyes of saplings.   10. Fly Traps - "Fly Traps?" you may ask, confused by their addition here. "Aren't those just used for pest control?" Indeed, we grow these in our gardens to help feed on any invaders or pest that may try to damage our crops, but we always find extra uses for things. It is the dryad way! Their sensitive hairs help them detect bugs landing in their maws, which then snap shut and coat them in digestive fluids. This makes a good meal for the plant, but we found them to be pretty tasty for us too! Ever had a Fly Wrap? You take a big trap on one of these plants and then drop a bunch of meat and ingredients into its waiting maw. Let it close on this morsel and begin to digest it. This breaks it down into a nice gooey sludge, mixing it all together. You then snap the trap off after a certain amount of time has passed, depending on how crunchy or gooey you want the wrap. The sealed maw makes the perfect shell, holding in all the goodies for you to take a bite out of! Obviously, there are countless recipes for these, but I am still a fan of the original Fly Wrap. Get some big bugs and stuff them in, then give it a minute to just start the digestive process. You want it to still have that crunch to it, where the shells aren't completely dissolved. I feel it adds a nice texture to the meal, as a wrap filled with only goop is a little too samey for me.   11. Marsh Squidhorn - Not to be confused with an actual animal, this fungus gets its name from its appearance and preferred habitat. Long crimson tendrils coated with a pungent slime, called gleba, that is used to attract scavenging bugs for spore dispersal. The "marsh" part also refers to this gunk, as the smell is quite potent and very "swampy." The tendrils themselves have a nice meaty texture to them, and work great when slapped onto a bun! The slime atop them makes the perfect sauce, though that depends if people like the earthy, swampy flavor it has. It is definitely a polarizing taste, either people love it or hate it. Very potent, even in small doses. Critics of it describe the experience as "eating a handful of bog mud." I enjoy the flavor, though it is one I couldn't eat every day. Makes a nice spread, and works great on sandwiches.   12. Black Umbrella Cap - Mushrooms weeping goo is not an uncommon thing but, like the Squidhorn, some of them are specially bred to make that goop tasty! The black slime leaking from the Umbrella Cap is meant to disperse spores, but this is now used as a popular spread and condiment, often called Ink Sauce. It has a bitter, meaty flavor to it, which works well when paired with sweeter dishes or breads. Harvesting the stuff is simple, just take a cup or bowl and scoop up one of the hanging droplets. It's like a natural dispenser! I did have a jar of this stuff packed for this trip, to help add some flavor to my blander rations, but that is long gone. I licked the container clean two days ago, but I may be tempted to see if I missed any.   13. Garden Pot - Another example of us finding an extra use for pest control plants. The Garden Pot is like a vegetable cauldron that lures in bugs with an irresistible scent then drowns in them digestive fluids. Certainly a good way to catch insect invaders before they start chewing on your plants, and also a great way to make some delicious broth! It makes some tasty soups from all the bugs that fall in, or you can add your own ingredients! The digestive fluid breaks down a wide variety of meats and foods, so you can melt up a wonderful broth and then ladle it out into bowls. Garden Pots are pretty much outdoor kitchens, and are excellent at making a meal out of unwanted crops. Whenever you get fruits or fungi that are damaged or too far gone, just toss them into the Garden Pot to add some flavor to your next broth! Of course, always leave some of the soup in the plant so that it can eat too!   14. Puff Loaves - An absolute staple for any dryad kitchen, Puff Loaves are pretty much our version of bread (though we totally still make and eat bread). Soft spongy fungi that you can use for practically anything! Slice it open and stuff it to make a sandwich! Scoop out the insides and fill it with some delicious buggy broth! Drizzle warm honey over it and enjoy it as is! Slice it up and add the spread of your choice! The possibilities are endless! Ooooh, what I would give to have some right now. Two slices of Puff Loaf with a big slab of honey beef right in between! A little drizzle of fly sauce and oh I can't keep talking about it! I will go crazy! 15. Sky Fans - A brilliant blue shelf fungus that grows on tree trunks, the color and shape makes it seem like a piece of the sky fell down. A hard skin hides a soft inside, which makes a pleasant texture when biting into one. Just snap them off a tree and use them in a variety of recipes. The spongy flesh within wicks up fluids nicely once the skin has been cut open, so soaking them in juices adds to the flavor. Even as they are, they are quite tasty. Slice them into triangles and dip them in some honey or ink sauce. An easy snack for when guests come over! Just prepare a bunch, because it is easy to scarf down a ton without thinking! 16. Bulawa Fungus - While its club or mace like shape gives it its name, the more known thing about this fungi is its parasitic nature. The spores infect insects, which then leads to the fungus growing through their bodies and bursting out in bulbous stalks. Bad news for insects, but edible for us dryads. The thin stalk isn't really the part you eat (though you can), it is the swollen top that has the real flavor. Crunchy shell outside, with powdery spores on the inside. The dust has a nice mellow flavor, and kind of leaves a tingle on the tongue. Usually dipped in various sauces or coatings. It can either be snack or a dessert depending on what you cover it with. Word of advice that may seem obvious: don't feed these to any pet bugs you may have. They are tasty treats for sure, but I don't think you want to be picking them off your dead friend.   And I think that is enough for now because I am about to eat this journal entry, as it seems way more appetizing than Crust Soup... Chlora Myron Starving Natural Historian -----------------------------------------------------

“Flora and Fungi of the Dryad Kitchen”

Weird writing about all these fungi to eat while I am not even a fan of mushrooms on pizza. Truly a fantasy world, I guess! Which ones would you eat?

[elsolaer]

STELLE HEADCANON: EFFECTS OF THE STELLARON.

here's a quick roundup of headcanons on how the stellaron that was put into stelle affects her physically, mentally, & otherwise.

throughout the game, a constant issue that the player character (who will be referred to as stelle from here on out) is consistently mentioning or experiencing is headaches. there are often options to say that your head hurts and in uncontrollable dialogue & flavor text its alluded to often enough that i'm going to attribute it towards a physical side effect of the stellaron. stelle has learned to ignore it for the most part but the stronger the stellaron's influence becomes, the worse her headache becomes. this happens regularly in battle because the bulk of her power is from said stellaron, but is overridden by adrenaline. these headaches can make it difficult to sleep and think straight. although her personality is a large factor as to why she's constantly zoning out/not paying attention, the physical effects of her condition do NOT help.

another physical effect is lack of energy. stelle is often very lethargic and ready to (try to) go to sleep. as mentioned above, this is overridden often by adrenaline but it is not uncommon for her to start dozing off wh en there isn't much action going on. the specific reasoning for this is unknown, but i imagine it'd be extremely exhausting to have something like this in you at all times.

this one's just straight up canon: stelle regularly has premonitions of future events and flashbacks of past events that she had no part of. she's like the world's worst prophet. i write her as consistently saying weird, out of context things and part of why i lean so heavily on it is to make it difficult to tell if she's actually saying something important or if it's just nonsense. she herself is not aware of if what she's saying is true or not. her most vivid experiences are when she's asleep- this girl has not known a peaceful night of sleep. her dreams are consistently vivid and surreal and while they are not always prophetic, they often are. especially when she's near another stellaron that would correspond with her own.

much of stelle's odd mannerisms and "delusions" (the twins at the end of the goethe hotel hallway, the smiling man at the alley by the theatre, etc…) can also be attributed to the stellaron's influence. i'm still going back and forth on this, but im thinking that a lot of the weirder inner monologuing that goes into the poetic & overly detailed territory is from its influence as well. it may even be a voice in her head, but i'm not going to go too far into that in case we find out otherwise.

this is a smaller thing, but i imagine stelle has a lot of dumb luck that may have something to do with the stellaron. it evidently gives her premonitions and flashbacks and all of that oracle type nonsense so… it would make sense that it helps with her intuition as well.

obligatory mention: i don't think the stellaron will let stelle truly die unless something interferes or it's power wanes. in the beginning of the game when she shields march, i know that welt helps her but it's said consistently that nobody knows exactly what stellarons are or what they do. they just know that they are extremely powerful, (usually) catastrophic entities. all three of the one's we have seen so far (stelle's, jarilo-vi's, xianzhou) have been extremely different from one another. while they paint it as welt was the one who helped stelle survive, later we see stelle brings herself back to life when she's skewered by cocolia. the way that i'm interpreting it as of now is that welt stabilized her, especially since she had just recently gotten the stellaron put into her at this point. side tangent: i expect that the end of xianzhou we will see the cycle continue of stelle dying and bringing herself back to life so that she can harness another aeon's power, but i am also extremely interested in seeing welt's role in this since he had a major role in stelle's first death.

[erigold13261]

Anon who can’t draw here. Why do you think NSR and Psyconauts characters all look so queer(affectionate) and attractive? (Attractive as in top tier character design) i would like an opinion of an artist

Love you!

Well it all depends on the person looking I would say. Someone who is a bigot and likes these games would deny that any of them look queer. Others might say a character is horribly drawn if they aren't sexualized. And then some people sees a "bad" character design (one that seems to be universally hated) and still love it to bits.

However, I do think that a large portion of the eccentric-ism of each game, in both design form and storytelling form, is a huge factor of why "less normal" people like these games (so people who aren't cishet or neurotypical). Both games really play with shapes and colors along with darker topics (even if it's just implied). So already there will be a disproportionate amount of "not normal" people already in these fandom spaces.

That alone counts for a large portion of people seeing these characters as queer, which can affect the media as a whole as people who look up fanart/fic of these games are now seeing more queer headcanons or art that shows off things they didn't realize were subtly implied or referenced to in the game.

But also, with in-game reasons, I would say Psychonauts having a canonically gay couple does help make other characters look queer, or at least accepting of queerness (which helps people see those characters as some flavor of queer even if it's not fully implied or something). Then there's the fact that those games talk about mental illness, healing, getting support from your family, love, all things that a lot of queer and neurodivergent people want in media without it being made a joke or villainized. (Plus the added angst is something that really helps people connect and possibly project onto characters).

Similar reasons for NSR, where the game kinda promotes shipping in the sense of Sayu talking about love and May with 1010 (and all the retweets and shares from Metronomik being cool with ships) so already there will be people who ship queer relationships, which then get promoted by the game company, leading people to see this as a soft canon. And even though I think Eve is the only confirmed queer person (She's demisexual, but correct me if i'm wrong about the others being or not confirmed) there are still a lot of queer coding in these characters (one being Neon afraid to dance/not liking his body and wanting to make 1010 look more masculine, which can be seen as trans-coded, at least to me).

The story itself of NSR is also something that resonates with queer and neurodivergent people. It is about overcoming an oppressor, making amends with friends and family, learning how to communicate, dealing with mental illness as well. The story itself is a big factor of people liking this game, since gameplay can be lacking at times. The characters have depth but also allow for a LOT of manipulation in their story and behavior as they are not as fleshed out compared to like Psychonaut characters.

I am starting to lose focus. I probably have more to say about NSR but I'm gonna go into the design/visuals for now.

Design wise, the characters are unique. Psychonauts plays around with shapes really well, especially when constructing hair and facial proportions. And NSR, though a bit standard in how it presents bodies, still has unique silhouettes and character designs (especially with DJ and Mama), not to mention the colors are vibrant and not natural (psychonauts tries to stick in a more "realistic" color palette at least in the real world but still plays around with their colors).

So like, the attractiveness/top teir character design, comes from strong and unique proportions along with cohesive color design. Shape theory is also a really good thing that goes into character design. Like my favorite thing about NSR is how physically different Eve is, even though she is a human (supposedly) she is built differently to show how she feels like an outcast. And then you have characters like Helmut who, even though still fits in with the rest of the cast, is extremely big but still shows off how soft he can be instead of being intimidating with his size (also love the fact that he's probably the biggest extrovert and still has anxiety/panic attacks).

Even just the color of the characters is important. 1010 have super bright and saturated colors to them, but only one color each and black and white covers most of their body to give breathing room to their designs. As Sayu's phases progress, more and more colors appear, but all the colors are complimenting each other instead of fighting for dominance.

Looking just at Helmut, both mental world and character design. Lots of colors and shapes are being used, but nothing is fighting for dominance a lot of the time. You are still able to see where you need to go most of the time in the game, and Helmut's design has a breathing room for the eyes to rest on (such as the black of his coat and his face area).

So yeah, the combination of character design (visual and vocal) and the story really are the main contributing factors for a lot of these characters being well liked and either queer-coded or canonically queer. Hopefully this made sense, I basically just woke up so yeah lol.

[sanjuwrites]

hello on this day of nice asks i would like to ask about the love of my life aishwarya. how did you come up with her, misc trivia (what’s her favorite ice cream flavor, what dish is her absolute weakness, what kinds of books does she love) things you’re going to include in the series and things you’re not i want to know everything pls

oh my god i could go on for ages about her, i love aishu to pieces. i have an entire "aishu begins" style fic in the works, but i am happy to feed you until i finish that one (which wont be for a while lmao)

okay aishwarya rajesh is a heavy combination of people i know in my life, and some of my own personality traits thrown in there. there's a lot to be said about the lack of queer poc/brown women in hollywood, and that was definitely a driving factor of in the creation of her character. she was originally someone i would just write these little scenarios about in the margins of my notebook, going as far back as my freshman year of high school with a couple of other OCs.

ironically, i've always had the same face claim and profession for aish - anupama parameswaran (who is absolutely stunning btw) and paramedic. She evolved as I did, fleshing out into a fully fleshed character over the years.

when i restarted lone star and started engaging in the fandom, i realized that this was a safe space for this character i had shaped into someone i loved so dearly.

anyway enough about how i created her <3

favorite ice cream flavor: has to be haagen-dazs coffee-chip or talenti's chocolate peanut butter cup gelato. she's literally obsessed with chocolate and peanut butter, it's a sureshot way of getting you to forgive her.

favorite dish: aloo paratha, oh my god it's pani puri. whenever tk and carlos did something really stupid, they'd go begging Aparna to help them make aloo paratha so she'd forgive them. once carlos started picking up cooking, carlos started making it himself, picking up so many other recipes. it's a bonding thing for the trio now, where they all go to one of the three houses and make one of aparna's recipes. they absolutely carry this into their adult life, and it's one of aishwarya's favorite traditions that was carried from their childhood.

books she loves: crime thrillers. she's obsessed with them, she thinks there's so goddamn interesting, and she will make carlos read them with her and send him her insane theories (she's right almost 95% percent of the time and it drives carlos nuts) (he doesn't know she reads ahead and actually knows how it ends, and she just likes his reaction) (tk does know this and watches the chaos unfold with his cider every. single. time.)

okay so i've alluded to an aish/iris relationship before, but never really discussed anything, buuuut aish's got an ex-boyfriend, rahul. thye broke up on good terms because rahul realized aish was in love with iris but wasn't ready to confront it yet. they stayed friends and i have not decided yet, but i think they hooked up on and off throughout college, after which iris and aish reconnect again romantically (they do repair their friendship, but they both wanted more)

i'm cutting myself off, because i could tak about her for hours and still have more to share. she's so special to me.

send me more asks about her, please. i love talking about her.

[duvithemook]

I keep seeing on my dash this one post that pushes the idea that "literally any aspect of the self is invented, you have nothing that you couldn't live without, your personality is invented" and I just. Fucking hate it. It's a sense of nihilism taken to the nth degree masquerading as an optimistic sentiment.

The poem it cites, "The Flinch", is mostly responsible for what enrages me, but the pseudo-intellectual comic about "just change your personality, it's not hard" is also infuriating. Let's remove some nuance from the argument, like relapsing into old habits, necessity due to environmental factors, and lamenting beneficial behaviors because they don't reflect the self, and just focus down on the main argument: "you are the way you are exclusively because you have decided to be, and that can change at any moment". Let's really examine it.

Firstly, on an entirely and EXCLUSIVELY scientific level, the argument of "nature vs nurture" being foremost in human development of brain structure is STILL HOTLY DEBATED. To tell the truth, we know shockingly little about the human mind and habit development that can't be disproven on an individual basis! On top of that, many things cited in the poem, like the way someone tastes food, are PURELY biological and not even based slightly in choice. You can't CHOOSE to like a flavor or texture you hate, and while it's good to see if that changes over time, it's not something you can make an active choice to enjoy.

Secondly, from a non-scientific standpoint, the false equivalences are through the roof. To put "learning an instrument" on the same difficulty level as "quitting an addiction" on the same necessity level as "reforming your personality to spice things up" reads as at the very least tactless and thoughtless, and at the very worst nihilistic waffle about how lack of flexibility is cowardice, that everything a person chooses is inherently wrong if not constantly under scrutiny, and that we're all basically mindless non-individuals following habits except for the real chads who constantly change everything about themselves and never commit to a solid set of personality traits.

Third and finally, the most infuriating part of the whole thing: the final part, to insist upon completely discarding the self, is an actively harmful sentiment for people who struggle to find their sense of self, people who tend to depersonalize or dissociate, and people who might use it as an excuse to exhibit harmful behaviors. People like that, like myself in the first and second categories, would feel as though the sand we had finally collected a handful of was smacked from our hands, only to be told to collect some elsewhere. What am I to do when I don't have a personality as much as a set of things I try to achieve? IS that a personality? Do you believe I should change my goals and ideals because Breaking Habits Is Good, or should I stick to my guns on some undefined, unspecified, arbitrary set of rules? I know that writer doesn't have an answer for any of this, but I do: the individual is TANGIBLE. It can be FELT when it is HAD, and those without it feel the bloody gape it's missing from like a bullethole.

TL;DR you are not immune to pseudointellectualism and smug self-assured nihilists can find a purpose to life by eating shit. Try it, I hear it's a great habit breaker.

[moe-broey]

I don't know where you want to take the FE flavored bits in your Pokemon AU, but in the Pokemon Anime there are some side plots involving modern/vestigial royalty. (Dawn's or Chloe's doppelgangers come to mind.) So, if Al and Shari are still descended from royalty in this AU, the Honedge line could be an Ancient Royal Family Tradition. I can picture Gustav using Alfonse's Aegislash or lack-there-of (still a Doublade?) as a point of contention, even if the family "kingdom" is just an old castle estate now. If Al doesn't have one/evolved his later than normal/non-traditionally than he is still Immature and Not Ready etc. Which would kinda fill in as a decent plot translation for their Bad Paternal/Filial Relationship.

But that's just a thought, since Aegislash really is just a strangely "Alfonse" pokemon. I hope however your ideas take form they bring you joy.

OHHH THIS IS FASCINATING.... I'm def most familiar with the game lore, and even then it's been a while since I was Deeply in The Interest so I'm rusty! The idea of the Askr family still being royalty here just wasn't a possibility in my mind!

For the lore of it, I was definitely gonna start with referencing the Aether Foundation, and go from there (esp since gen 7 has my ENTIRE heart story/character lineup wise, DEF left the deepest impression on me back then! 🥺🫣 ScarVio def matches it though). But my thought process was, translating royalty into being the head of a big important foundation or company... esp one like the Aether Foundation where it's benevolent on the surface, just. Has one crazy motherfucker behind it corrupting things from the inside 🧍. WHICH... wouldn't be a one-to-one, but I think also the politics of different organizations could easily translate to evil team plots and whatnot (esp in the case of Embla, maybe a rival to whatever Askr has going on?)

But as you can probably tell, none of this has even been thought about yet LMFAOO 😅 I DO really like the approach here though... where the "royalty" is just some old tired but emotionally significant tradition. The rivaling families can still exist too. Just on a much, MUCH smaller and petty scale. WHICH IS SO FUNNY TBH.... imagine being just some guy, who gets tangled up in this. Stupidest most oddly compelling family drama ever, that spans generations. Which surely won't explode into something catastrophic.... if...... general rules about evil teams in Pokemon and Embla itself is anything to go by.... (LIKE. USING "evil team" as a BROAD descriptor here. In my head I'm imagining what if Team Aqua/Magma weren't extremist environmentalists and instead had like an XY old royalty family rivalry plot. Something to that effect!)

BUT!!!! BUT!!!!! I DO REALLY LOVE THE AEGISLASH IDEA........ the Foreshadowing of it...... but also the characterization!!!!! With Aegislash's offense form/defense form gimmick!!!!

I am ALWAYS thinking about Alfonse's characterization of being someone who may play defense for a little too long. During the Flavia FBs, he guards and blocks to his detriment, not making any real progress in the sparring. Then there's the promo/introduction of that PVP mode, demonstrated by Alfonse battling Veronica -- wherein, Alfonse starts off strong, but because he played too defensively as the game went on, Veronica got the upper hand and won. (THAT EXAMPLE. IS ALWAYS SUCH A FUNNY ONE TO PULL FROM FOR ME.... but the AMOUNT. Of characterization you get from it, even if it's not in-game material and is a promo/demo of a new mode. It's fascinating to me, and you see so succinctly how it plays out!)

But then you have the offense side of it!!!! Where there are just as many moments it seems (or, as time has gone on and Alfonse has gained more confidence), where he acknowledges that a defensive approach won't work. He thinks it through. He comes up with A Plan. And that plan usually involves going ALL out, All or Nothing, FOR THE THROAT, putting his whole pussy into it!!!!!! The reckless factor, the "calculated risks", ect ect!!!!! Get em, Alfonse!!!!! You crazy bitch!!!!!!

I JUST THINK. THE WAY YOU CAN DO STORYTELLING IN POKEMON. IS ALWAYS SOOOOOO FUN AND FASCINATING. You have 1000+ mons to pick from, with HUNDREDS of little quirks that make up all of them. From dex entries, to playstyle, appearances ofc, typings, and game mechanics (age old tried and true storytelling device of the friendship evolution Pokemon, AND EVEN!!!! TRADE EVOLUTION POKEMON!!!!! Which could inform you about a character's connection to other trainers, even if that other trainer isn't a character themselves... the implication, that maybe a loner type trainer has a trade evo Pokemon that they WERE able to evolve... who helped them do that? 👀). That's just a handful of the things you can work with! The amount of depth you can go with is astounding!!!! And perhaps... overwhelming 😅🧍

[bh-writingdump]

Divine Punishment

Part 2: Jackal [5]

[1st draft, reframing]

You race to the elevator. If you keep at this pace, you’ll make it to the golf course in time to put 24 holes by dinner. the hallway parts preemptively for your arrival.

Only for a voice like whip shouts. “Mx!” Why of all thing did you hire a senior manager with the voice of a bullfrog? “Jameson & Co just acquired Davi’s Pops.”

Internally, you groan. That’s bad. Davi is financing a venture that they couldn’t follow through on without help. There’s no way Jameson & Coo wouldn’t shut it down long before the product release. They’ve been notorious of undercutting prices and finding every single way to pour salt in your wound. And you already moved the cheapest labor you could overseas. There aren’t any more corners that can be cut.

Heavens and Earth, this mess will take month to balance out… unless.

“Mix, we’ll be in the red by next—”

“Dissolve 25% of the earth department, shut down all experimental projects with a risk about 10%.”

Your assistant close behind, scribbling. While the upper manager stares in disbelief.

“You have your orders go.”

You push the elevator button with more force than strictly necessary. Several others gathered by the elevator. Looing at each of them, you say. “this one’s mine.”

Your upper manager leaps into the elevator after you, “But that’ll mean laying off at least several hundred to make the—”

“Nobody’s getting laid off if I can help it.”

You send them a hard look, shutting them up instantly, but it’s too late. The folks waiting for the elevator eye each other, already ready to pass around the newest gossip that will screw with productivity further.

“Whatever comes out of your mouth better be damn worth it. the drop in morale alone, possible rats jumping ship before I can lay them off…

“Sorry, Mx, but that was only one of our allies acquisitioned. Several root beer family packs deals have fallen through picked up by Rip Tide Inc. 40% of our profits will be from those partnerships.

“Who signed off on those?”

By the lack of a response, you can only assume it was a shareholder or member of the board you pressed an executive behind your back. Those sluts will bend for anyone. “Of course they did.” Exasperated, soon as the elevator hits the market floor, you grab the manager. A pear shaped fellow with a penchant for polos and bandanas like some sailor-wannabe greets you.

“We need a new plan yesterday. There’s several flavors a rook proposed. Jade Yumenes, call nem and set up a plan of how to market those by Monday.”

The manager open his mouth to argue but one look over your shoulder and he sighs. “Yes, Mx.”

You glance over your shoulder finding not your upper manager there but your assistant typing away at xyr tablet. “That’s unfortunate.”

“What now? Another acquisition?”

“You fired Mx Yumenes last week.”

“What? Lemme see that? Sue enough the termination papers were signed by you. “call them and tell them they—”

“I’ll tell nem.” Your assistant still hasn’t looked you in the eye. Whether scared you’d fire them to or equally bogged down in the details of saving the company, it doesn’t matter.

“The factors will be closed overseas. Do we have any left locally?”

For several moments, you assistant doesn’t response, tapping away.

“Hey! You snap.”

Xe doesn’t even finch. Taking their time setting xyr tablet aside. “I’ve already sent word to the factories but it’ll take time to—”

“I don’t want to hear how you do it, make it happen. I am not losing this popsicle stand to some live streaming teenager.”

You march back toward the elevators. Canceling the golf, it can wait. For all you know your private golf courses will be something that has to be sold as well. A pity, it’s good to have a backup.

* * *

Late into the night, you make calls. Call in favors. See to it managers are back in the office and consulting executives how to expunge nearly 200 employees in a day.

Signing another form, you find yourself nodding off. you fill up another cup of coffee, it barely peels open your eyes. you stare into the gourmet fresh grounds. The murky brown bean water spins and swirls beneath your spoon. Until your head feels light and all of a sudden, you yourself being pulled into it.

You nose elongates to a sharpened point. Each swirl of your spoon sending it in a spiral, taking more of you with it. You try to yank yourself out, scream for help but by the time you do, you’ve face has stretched too far. It comes out as a whisper.

The sparse chatter of overtime workers flows through the door. Loud enough to drown out your whispered pleas as your dragged into your coffee.

Amongst the boiling juice, all your senses infused with the smell. You try to climb out. Something drags you deeper. Its scaley and smooth, a snake? How is there a snake in your coffee?

Never mind that, its tail rattles. The sound deafening beneath the surface. You kick, pulling. It’s too tight.

It’s then when your body starts to burn from the heat and oxygen starvation that wave rolls through the coffee.

A wave runs through the coffee. Then, you feel the snake pause in its tugging. The wave comes again, this time strong enough to force you further back. The snake yanks on you even harder.

Not until the third time the wave rolls by, this one enough to pick you from the water and throw you against solid ground. You cough and sputter, desperately climbing up the shore and away from the water. A V-shape comes toward you.

This time you hear a harmonious whistle in the distance. Whoever was after you, disappears. So does the muddy water until its clear enough that you can see the bottom. Shale like rock lines the floor, all the way to the bottom. Unless it’s hiding beneath one of the decaying logs or in the mud at the bottom, you doubt it’s there.

As you recover, it strikes you as strange. You were certain you’d inhaled some of the coffee-water—whatever that was. Yet, your throat doesn’t burn, much less did you spit up the coffee. In fact, you’re entirely dry, in an entirely different suit than you came in. Your favorite from back when you declared your first company to the public and began collecting shareholders.

The dark green matched with a treefrog green tie and stripped shirt with limited edition Oxfords that you’re certain you lost years ago. Not only that, but it doesn’t have that tiny stain nobody managed to get out on the inside of the sleeve.

A chill rolls down your spine.

However you got here, someone must knew your routines, your history and gotten past 50 people without any raising the alarm of seeing a stranger, then somehow drug you and get you here…

But it felt so real..

You pull up your pant leg but there’s no mark of the creature.

Could it be a hallucination?

You glance around the rolling fields of wild flowers popping up between the rocks and patches of fertile soil. You’re sitting on the edge of a glacial lake. The cool wind as it rolls off the water despite the direct sun. You don’t recognize.

Whatever they gave you, it must’ve been strong.

But who?

You climb up a nearby hill. The walls of the lake steep but you manage to scale the uneven terrain to its lip. The view nearly makes you fall back again.

It’s no wonder you didn’t recognize the mountain. You’ve got to be in the middle of a whole range of them. Somehow at the top of one, you the slope in front of you is so sheer, no human could drop down it.

You blink, staring at it. “How… is that… even?” You glance back. Only to see something long and green crawl out of the water in a serpentine fashion. You gasp, stumbling back.

You feel yourself tipping over. You close your eyes, already knowing that’s it. You’re done.

Dying of the most convoluted assassination ever.

Fantastic job, you.

Just as you expect to feel the crushing embrace of jagged rocks, you hit something soft. You open your eyes to be staring at a blue sky though waves of golden grain.

It’s as if someone knocked you out again. The sun’s a little lower in the sky. The winds hot, everything’s warm. You wander through the grain. It stretches on endlessly all the way to the horizon. Except a little hill with someone waiting beneath a tree.

At a distance, you’d have assumed the strange to be of a pale complexion. Upon closer examination, you realize it’s because they literally are a shade of off white. Bones. A skeleton. Admittedly, you’d never seen a skeleton before. You’d heard of them in old myths but you assume they all died off awhile ago in the wars.

Clambering up the hill, you notice another figure beside em. This creature smaller, partially obscured what has to be a great deal taller than you.

The skeleton with the face of a jackal waves eir companion, a cat monster, back. By the time you summit the hill, amazed you hadn’t broken a sweat, eir companion had disappeared beneath the tree.  You only catch a bit of their conversation “I can handle Skylar. Ze’s just surprised.”

Skylar? You look behind you? There wasn’t anyone else. Or did they think you were this Skylar. E got your pronouns right though… which is concerning.

“Skylar, it’s been awhile. Do you remember--”

You close the distance, grabbing the stranger’s tie and yanking em down to eye level. Fuck all these god damn tall people. They’d look you in the eye for once. “I don’t know how you got the drop on me but if you want to escape with a single penny to your name, you’ll get me to the nearest police station. Right. NOW.”

For lack of a name, you call em Jackal. Jackal hums as if encountering a tricky conundrum. “Huh, you should’ve remembered upon seeing… how queer. Are you hungry?”

“I don’t think you understand the situation your in.”

Jackal smiles pleasantly. “Likewise.”

“You drugged me. KIDNAPPED me. Then kept drugging me! I don’t care if you’re from Jameson & Co or some other half-baked scheme, you’re lucky I don’t tear you apart as it stands. There’s a tracker within me, they’ll find me any minute now.” You cross your arms, memorize this hustler’s features for eir time in court.

“Skylar…” Jackal sighs.

“My name isn’t Skylar! Do you even know who you kidnapped?”

“Enlighten me.” You wait for the sarcasm but none comes.

“Soon to be your worst nightmare. Where’s your car?  You’ve got to have a car somewhere to be in butt fuck nowhere?”

Jackal remains silent as you search the nearby fields. There aren’t even game trails. It’s as if nobody has been out here for years. You don’t even see any signs of animals. Just the grass.

Whatever this place is, something is very wrong with it.

“I have nothing to hide. I could’ve told you I live here.”

Before you realize it, you’re fist flies, hitting em square in the jaw. The move seems to surprise you just as much as em. You’d never hit someone before. Yet, it came so easily.

“Oh, that’s rich. You’re wiping minds too? Think I wouldn’t notice how I forgot I took self-defense classes?” You bounce on the balls of your feet. It doesn’t feel natural, not like punching him. Didn’t have to be. All you have to do is convince this bozo e picked the wrong joy to kidnap. “How about I ruin that pretty little suit of yours?” It hadn’t been lost on you the accoutrement. It’s an exact replica from a fictional frog from a picture book you loved as a kid. “Unless you want to fess up and tell me how the hell I got here?”

Jackal’s shoulders drop. “you wouldn’t believe me.” In eir moment of looking away, you charge.

Instead of fighting back, the jackal ducks beneath your arm. Quite a feat for someone a foot taller than you, like it was a game. You turn on your heel, racing at him again. E pulls at the fabric of eir suit like it suddenly appeared, Sniffing it, Jackal murmurs while examining a pocket watch. “You have strange tastes. This was outdated even in my day.”

The next time, you dive for a tackle. This time Jackal disappears entirely, as if being corporal was a distraction. You whirl around, half expecting em to drop out of a tree only to find em further down the hill. Long strides graceful, unlike you as your stumble on your hands and knees, practically tripping over yourself.

“No matter, I’ll make do.” E shirks off the coat, letting it crump to eir feet along with removing eir socks and shoes like some wild child as your father would say. Burying eir feet in the loose soil, e sighs.

You stalk up behind the Jackal.

E sighs, “You can’t expect to meet me and dress me unannounced. It’s rude.” Jackal holds up the pair of sleek leather boots, glaring at them. “Your people’s ideas of footwear verge on torture, are you aware? Or do you just, make do?”

“What?”

Jackal shakes their head. “Never mind, what was it you wanted to ask me?”

“What is wrong with you?” You growl. “You kidnapped me for a ransom or to eliminate me right?”

“No. Why would? I was the one who invited you here.”

It’s akin to mixing gummy candy and soda. “Fine. You don’t want to help me. I’ll find my own way home.”

“I wouldn’t advise that.” Eir voice comes from beside you.

You definitely don’t scream. Instead, you leap back, tumbling down the hill. Jackal shouting after you. When you finally stop, Jackal’s leaning over you. “Are you—” E sighs, disappearing to dodge you from kicking em. “Of course, it’s all fun and games before someone checks up on you.” Jackal rolls eir eyes. “If wrestling would help, I would’ve initiated.” E dodges, not even bothering to pretend e was cheating.

“Then leave me alone!” You shout.

This time you throw your hand, Jackal catches it. You freeze as Jackal pats it. “All right.” A sad sort of smile spreading over eir serene features. “I’ll be here if you need me.”

Next thing you know, you’re snoring on your desk. Coffee spilling all along the floor and someone knocking at the door. You groan.

It was just a dream. None of it was real.

You can’t help but laugh, somewhat hysterically.

Of course it wasn’t real! You fell into your coffee, suddenly woke up on a glacier. Then fell into a meadow hundreds of miles away that had no bugs or people in any direction but a jackal headed skeleton cosplaying as a child’s book character.

You let yourself laugh for awhile. Evening ignoring your secretary’s calls until finally you get a grip. It has to be the stress of managing this transition. That’s it. The headaches, the dreams, it’ll all go away once this blows over.

[billk128]

Anna Shoemaker - Someone Should Stop Her - demo notes

To start, thank you Anna (and John), for allowing me the listen and to offer my feedback, I really appreciate it. Ask any questions, and I don't know how to be other than honest, so forgive any lack of knowledge or dismiss any questionable feedback, I'm just winging it and letting the thoughts fly.

Holy crap - Holly has nearly 4.5 million hits on Spotify. OK, most of the below can be ignored, but I immersed myself into this and enjoyed it. And I am used to being ignored.

I approached this in a few different ways, but landed on an in-between "review" and I guess what I'd call "production notes" - the latter in part based on my own experience helping create, arrange, mix, and "produce" our own (Chilblains) attempts at music, but still tied to my long listening history and the review aspect (I ended up taking and leaving notes on each song). And I also listened from an album perspective (or "record," the term as I use it below), considering sequencing and the flow of songs.

Admittedly, this genre of music falls outside of my typical lanes, but that factor enabled me to listen differently and appreciate the elements and melodies and vocal permutations, all of which are quite good and well presented. So I have enjoyed the exercise because the music is good - great job, Anna!! And the melodies are sticking with me, always a good sign...

Real Life Baby kicks off the set nicely, with a versatile blend of music and a generally crisp-sounding mix that previews much of what is to follow. The more organic sounding elements I hear - I believe that is a banjo in the mix in the chorus and outro - are integrated nicely. The vocal progression perhaps overreaches a bit in that 2:03-2:20 bridge (hard to make out what's being sung), and hints at a larger release, but then you pull it back. Which is an approach that I comment again on below...

One general note, and I hear it across a handful of songs - the fretboard fingering squeaks are a bit too prevalent in the mix - they do add some authenticity, but in moderation, at least to me.

In Fields, the acoustic guitar is a highlight of a really good 2nd song in the record sequence, albeit the whispered parts seem more like a sonic deception than part of the story. Excellent backing track mix to the conclusion as well.

Game of Thrones has an attractive melody, though the generally unimpactful drumming throughout starts to register as a minor weakness, while the effect-centric and the at times washing over sound template starts to get a bit more apparent in this track as well. But the heightened tempo is welcome and rises above the drums, and coupled with the winning vocal arrangements could make this a candidate for a single. I also very subjectively thought some lead guitar lines added to the outro might add some flavor...

Not Your Baby gives the drums some room to express, and they deliver to a degree, but I still find them a bit stiff and maybe too compressed sounding here. Then I feel the tension/release aspects of this (and other songs) gets a little short-changed. For example here, at 2:08, the "I'm getting older..." piece starts - you do it once; maybe run through those 2 sets of lines again, sustaining that tension, and then the release hits with the drum break, and let that release continues through the outro...and while I do like the slower instrumental ending, it's a tact you use on other songs, so just a consideration to mix things up a bit.

Back Again hints an electric guitar backing that I admittedly wanted beefed up a notch - maybe just in the chorus for a little extra edge. Squeaky fretboard alert, and you peel back a bit again for the ending, but that musical outro is nicely imagined - and echoes a combination a band from Philly called Marah used to employ in a more rock setting (they are since defunct).

Iced Coffee ring bluesy torch-like - a good change of pace here - and hearing what I would consider your more natural vocal style in the verses is appealing as well.

Gas Station Parking Lot has a pop country texture here, an electro texture there, is another song about a boy and a girl (can't really say men and women when the phone is so critical to the decision, but I am clearly not the demographic), has kind of gratuitous cursing, but also a strong lead vocal and supporting vocal textures, a bracing bridge...and then sort of an exhaled ending. Maybe too many good ideas that don't quite coalesce.

Close to the Sun has a great chorus and hints at a rock version that might be a good alt take to release as a "B" side. Pump up the tempo and guitars a bit, get a rock drummer that kicks in during the first chorus, reconsider the ending (which feels a little clipped). Just ideating here - the song is strong, if perhaps a bit unfinished, and placed well in the record's sequence, setting up for...

Horse Girl 's gentle intro (fretboard alert) and delicate vocal techniques. I feel the song really starts to gain momentum and then it ends - and again, this kind of stop/start approach used frequently on the record leaves me a bit wanting at times. Which isn't necessarily bad, you want the listener to want more, so a subjective and fine line of balance there...

Miniskirt has a promising, indie guitar tone to start that thickens up and gets washed over a bit by keys in the chorus - and if that is more consistent with the overall tone of the record, the song doesn't really rise above that level.

Wishful Thinking - Another song about a breakup indeed, ha, this might be the best line on the record (kidding!! still, timely). That said, you might want to move this one up in the sequencing (or not, I'm thinking Spotify listeners not listening all the way thru...). I say this because this one also struck me as a potential single. It's a wistful pop tune, with a bouncy tempo, hooky chorus, and sneaky effective guitar. (The tune also reminds of Jesse Malin songs, and Derek Cruz's guitar/production sound on those, NYC indie dudes...). But sequencing less an issue when you have...

Holly - Per the note way above, when I saw this song kicking ass on Spotify, I started laughing at my old self. Here are my initial notes, and I clearly know NADA, hilarious: "3 songs w cigs now, and too many Fs and fretboard runs…a nice tempo jump, but stemmed by the torchy conclusion…maybe add some more rhythm guitar to the mix...drums, meh"...listening here now for the Xth time, it sounds wonderful. Other than the drums and the ending, ha, I just can't help myself...

Final notes: To be clear, I have no issues with curse words, but their value diminishes with use and their use gets "explicitly" labeled and cut from radio versions, that's all.

Songs about relationships...finding other ways to express the emotions and frustrations and everything else in life is hard, but mining other artists attempts at reflecting on humanity will inspire new thought. I have my own faves, but the options of course are numerous...

Again, really good record, thank you again for letting me immerse and spew my nonsense, congratulations and good luck!

-b

973-610-0440

billk128@gmail.com

[titanicfreija]

"Your Guardian clearly learned much of her expression from you, but her youth leads to an earnestness I appreciate. The result has been enlightening, if overly.... Saturated?"

"Are you looking for a word that means "too much" in a way like too much of an intense flavor or bright color?"

"Indeed."

"Yeah. She's... A lot. And the sweetest! She doesn't even know what she said! I've been glowing all day."

"I am often puzzled by your use of this word. You lack the capacity for taste in addition to referring to behavior as having a flavor. Having seen what you refer to, I understand better. Is this a standard use of the word?"

"It has been. Language, you know."

~

"Indeed...."

"...?"

"..."

"???"

"I have been observing Guardians on the field more closely. As you say, to observe a Ghost and a Guardian would require constant surveillance, but I am granted a view of active Guardians regularly in situations where they depend heavily on their Ghosts. Where do you hide? During combat?"

"Depends on the Guardian. I stay in Freija's mark-- the belt. Most of us stay in backpacks and pockets, and a few of us know how to exist dematerialized or incorporate into helmets, but I can't do that."

"Hm."

"What is it?"

"I am wondering if this conversation would be better to have with your Guardian. I believe so. However, I ask you now-- Is it stressful?"

"What--fighting?"

"In a sense. You reported feelings of guilt, regarding your Guardian and taking part in combat. I understood you to pity your enemies, but the guilt regarding the harm your Guardian suffers escaped me. I understand, now."

"Oh, you got to see someone really get hurt and get healed up, huh."

"The horror of war is just that. I never before considered the horrors of healing."

"Those slurping noises are the worst, aren't they? After that, it's the wet noise when you're putting limbs back on and bones grinding when you're setting them. Especially ribs."

"How many teeth do humans have?"

"When?"

"..."

"Thirty-two, but there have been biological limitations and complications that prevent development or growth; and traditions of removal for medical and cosmetic purposes throughout history so it depends on when the Guardian lived and died first as well as natural factors."

"They are fragile."

"Yep."

"Mrph."

"Yeeeaahh..."

"She does not complain?"

"Occasionally. She says she's in shock most of the time and doesn't feel much."

"Do you worry she lies?"

"... Sometimes, but she's not great at hiding pain."

"You watch your Guardian suffer frequently."

"... yeah."

"You have seen her body in multiple states of damage."

"Do you have a point?"

"I understand your sense of humor."

"...."

"I often forget you are also warriors. Even the kindest amongst you."

"I'm hardly the kindest."

"And still the kindest will have been through just as much war. Possibly more, as you yourself have only recently engaged. What do you think she will say when I ask her about the times she has been wounded in battle?"

"That she doesn't remember them."

"I wonder if you are correct."

".... Me, too.

~

Hard Questions

New Angle

Honest

Radio Chat

Scripted Questions

Battlefield <-

Fear

Enlightening

More like Interrogation

(In)humanity

Underlying

Ghost Affection