#I am proud to have progressed and become a better writer

[tswwwit]

Hey, I’m sorry, I really hope you don’t take offense to this but reading the newest one shot you just posted, and comparing it to Familiar!AU, it just goes to show, to me, how *starkly* you’ve improved. Of course I love familiar!au and it was well written, but this new fic is legitimately something else, just in the sheer quality of the prose. It’s downright EVOCATIVE. It’s gorgeous. The imagery and sentence structure and diction, damn. Thank you so much for writing it.

Again, I hope you don’t take offense. I’m simply telling you because if someone believed this about my writing, I’d want to know.

No offense taken at all! I know I've improved over time, and I appreciate you sticking with me through some of my rougher previous stuff! It's good to know that the progression is showing.

Let it be said: I shall never stop in my quest to become Good At Writing to better inflict Silly Gay Shenanigans on the internet.

[bardic-inspo]

2024 Writing Retrospection

Tagged by the lovely @amoremagnificentbastard 💜

What's been your biggest learning point this past year?

Don't wait until you're done with X to write the Y thing you've been dying to get to. Don't kill your own joy by forcing yourself to earn the fun parts. Write the fun parts now. Write them whenever and however you want to. Start as many things as you want. You don't have to finish everything you write for it to be worthwhile. Some stories are stepping stones for you to find your footing to the things you've wanted to work on, deep down.

How has your writing developed this past year?

I've been steadily working on becoming more concise and building my dialogue skills. I do still like to wax poetic on the tangible aspects (and I often have a lot to say, case in point hehe), but I'm proud with my progress. I think Aeterna Nostalgia in particular is a good example of this, especially compared to other longfics I've written. I think it gives my writing a better balance than it had in the past. I plan to keep working on this!

Good writing habits?

I think I've gotten better at gauging when to hunker down and when to take a break! And about taking time between when I stop editing and when I do my final, pre-posting read-through.

Bad writing habits?

My inner editor never shuts up. I have a love-hate relationship with it, because I do think it makes me write at a painstakingly slow pace, but in some respects, it saves editing later. I do wish I could shush that instinct a bit more.

Favorite thing you wrote?

Both of my Ascended Astarion fics, Aeterna Nostalgia and Blood in the Mortar. I don't see many portrayals of Ascended Astarion in the vein I depicted him (and I pretty much instantly devour those fics anytime I do), and so with these fics, I felt sort of like a kid in a candy shop getting to write the exact sort of thing I wanted to read myself.

Favorite reads?

Oh god, so many! Too many to count!

Since I mentioned not seeing too many Ascended Astarion fics in the flavor of him I typically like to read, I thought I'd call out some amazing writers who've written a dark and devilish A!A who still loves Tav/Durge/his consort. These are fics that, in my opinion, handle the complexity of A!A very well, and don't shy away from his darkness while still honoring all of the elements that make Ascended Astarion very much still Astarion. Many also feature a consort/Tav/durge/main character who can go toe-to-toe with a power-tripping Ascendant.

Sonnet of the Lone Cardinal by @brain-rot-central

Death & His Maiden by @pinkberrytea

Hell & You by @ladymdc

How Far You've Come & No Good Deeds & Magic, Music, and Mazes by Garnett Gibson

By Proxy and Oblivion & Obsession by @alcetryx

(*This is no shade whatsoever to those who write a more corrupted A!A whose affection for Tav is twisted, I just personally prefer the flavor I described. This list is, of course, non-exhaustive, and just features some of the fics I happened to read that I wanna throw more love on!!)

Biggest win?

About a year ago, I was brand new to a new fandom. I hadn't written in ~6 months or so. I'd never written anything besides Fallout fanfic. I had a lot of self-doubt, and felt like probably no one would read anything of mine, anyway. I felt like I was already late to a party where everyone had already made friends/servers/connections and fanon had some well-rooted opinions.

But now here I am, a year later, having made some amazing friends and met so many kind people who inspired me and encouraged me personally and creatively. I'm not self-doubt free, but I feel like I've found a space where I can write what brings me joy, and I get to be giddy about that with others. That's huge to me. That's everything.

Goals for the new year?

To keep working on the things I strove for last year: write what brings me joy, write semi-regularly (3-5 days a week), work towards being concise, and to write lots more Aeterna Nostalgia!

Your favorite words of the year, aka the words you check each chapter for, making sure you didn't repeat them 788 times?

OOOF I have a lot of these hehe. Off the top of my head, some common offenders include breath (like stealing/holding/catching a breath), jaw clenching, and the words 'fleeting', 'briefly', and 'tender'.

What are you excited for in the new year?

Reading more good fic, writing more fic, and getting to be giddy with friends about it!!

Tagging in turn: @electricshoebox, @brain-rot-central, @ladymdc, @dismalzelenka, @wilteddreamsofbaldursgate,

@elinorbard, and @marlowethebard if you wanna do this, no worries if not! 💜

[sunflowerquill]

The Glorification of Self-Deprecation in Art/Writing Spaces

Heads up, I also still self-deprecate from time to time, and I think it's perfectly fine to be humourous about yourself!

Most microtrends (usually with audios for short-form content or memes) in the writing and art community tend to always have a really... self-deprecating character to them? Again, it's of course alright to acknowledge your weaknesses in a funny way sometimes, but I think that social media's nature usually encourages people to be self-deprecating for laughs because people can more easily relate to flaws than strengths. Self-deprecation gets more engagement because negative content gets more engagement.

Sometimes, it's so people can feel better about themselves and see that every writer/artist has their flaws (which is good!). But when you start to identify with your self-deprecating thoughts so much that they become 'quirky flaws' that your mind is unwilling to change, it becomes a problem.

A big one I always see in the writing community is in regards to procrastination; rarely ever making progress on your work, doing everything but writing, etc. Now two notes here: of course procrastination can stem from things such as neurodivergence, and that's an exception! Procrastination isn't laziness. I myself have struggled with it in the past (and still do sometimes). But what I've personally learned is that scrolling through procrastination-related and self-deprecating memes on social media helped me much less than actually trying to fight my procrastination.

I'm not saying it's something easy (again, especially when it comes to procrastination that relates to neurodivergence), obviously you can't just tell your brain to stop procrastinating. Self-deprecation may ease the problem in the moment, but if it becomes a constant thing, I think it's more likely to turn into an obstacle for your journey rather than a boost.

It's alright to make memes/posts/thoughts that showcase how proud you are of your work! No matter your skill level, there is always something to admire. At least once in your life you'll have a moment where you're proud of what you've created. Cling onto what you think you did right and be proud of yourself for it!

For example, in the first drafts of my books (and even now to a lesser extent) I found myself holding back while writing. I feared adding 'flavour' to the narration because I believed I always had to have the serious formal style of more classic authors. I did make jokes about that to myself a lot, but I never really worked on improving because of it. I kept it as my 'quirky writing flaw' even though it bothered me a lot. It was only when I finally decided to get out of my comfort zone and improve that I felt better about my skills. I may not be fully there yet, but I have improved a lot in that aspect; and I am proud of it.

So next time while writing (or creating art), instead of always thinking to yourself "haha i'm so bad at writing kiss scenes" think "damn am I good at writing character descriptions". And also the classic "what's the issue here? How can I improve?" etc etc.

Happy writing/creating art. Hope this encouraged you, even slightly!

Toodles <3

[imustbenuts]

ouggh could you please elaborate on your criticism of brave Alfonse ...I like hearing your thoughts (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠)

alright. so this is just a messy sloppy thought vomit essay again im so sorry in advance.

and i am salty overall about this.

in 2 words: traditional conservatism

in many many words:

ALFONSE. OPEN UP YOUR WAY CARVE YOUR OWN PATH WHAT ARE YOU DOINGGGGGG IF YOU ARE SAYING HE HAS POTENTIAL JUST. FUCKING. COMMIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU COWARDS! HAAAAAAAAAAAUGHHHHHHHHHHHHG learn from your dad's ruling policy yes but don't become your dad and carve for the affection you cannot have jfc

IN MORE WORDS

gustav is. objectively speaking, not a good father in the emotional growth department. I've mentioned and maintained by him looking like an Asian tiger parent from my pov. even if he does lay out proper foundations and maybe good hc adjacent policy for country ruling, his approach of parenting is questionable at best.

I get him operating under pressure and sickness with a limited time left to raise his son in a manner befitting of the throne but like. All sink and no swim? No proper explicit guidance? You can't just be "I want my child to meet expectations and dispense no love", that's just straight up neglect my guy. hes very much the 2 faced proud big important parent person.

realistic, but yuck.

i dont think they even have a father son moment probably ever. Henriette and Gustav have a more functional relationship bc they actually dated and had proper human interaction, but it's likely given cultural asian and high expectations context irl, his kids were treated more like objects and successors. Despite everything he might have felt and expressed behind the scenes. again, the affection is not expressed and conveyed directly enough to his kids, and alfonse being his successor means. alfonse has major daddy issues and anxiety about succeeding the throne.

So now, brave alfonse, having lost this dad and understandably craving for fatherly affection and going through it in the plot, is. you know. in the process of redefining himself. arguably is always, but now, its either he's the successor of, King Gustav the Great II or The Next King of Askr. his role as with many many other of his type are to be a signifier of a new era. thats the whole point of successors!

hes even all "ILL OPEN THE WAY". implying that something before wasnt working out and a new path must be blasted open for a better future. thats the whole theme.

But the effect of Alfonse donning his fathers armor in this case is not respect, it reeks of insecurity! again, does alfonse know his father as Gustav The Person to a reasonable degreee? if by that we mean a neglecful parent but a decent king, okay. but why is there a need to repeat this cycle by wearing from head to toe, from body language to skill 1:1 of his dad. howis this a good thing...

dude. what the hell is intsys doing. do i need to call their parents or what the hell is this conservative traditional filial pathetic nonsense. what the hell happened to all of the other fire emblems who are 5 steps more progressive than this

(granted i do find FE to be very conservative on the whole now that ive stewed in the pot of it all but thats a me thing. it could also be dependant on the writer but idk them well enough to know who does what)

and heres my ideal fucking scenario, right. not very hard. id argue just picking up gustav's mantle OR axe and then working it into a new outfit that is explicit alfonse's would be miles better and what i would want. a signifier that alfonse the character knows himself and wants to walk his own path while honoring the good parts of gustav and discarding the bad.

not this. reanimation method of almost wanting to wear his fathers' skin. as if he cant move on and stand on his feet. as if hes unsure. as if they dont want him to commit (at least not yet bc we gonna milk FEH for as much as we can). despite. all the things that have been happening.

instead of rolling with the punches the armor feels like him not doing that. it might have been an easy alt to decide on, but character wise, i dislike it a lot.

[tellmegoodbye]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you @sznofthesticks for the tag!

How many works do you have on ao3?

10. I used to have around 30, but I orphaned a bunch of my old stuff recently.

What's your total ao3 word count?

112,750

What fandoms do you write for?

Shameless, 911 Lone Star, and hopefully 911 in the future? I really want to but I don't have any ideas atm.

Top five fics by kudos:

I excluded fics that I cowrote, so this is all completely my own writing. These are all more recent too, so this is much more representative of my current writing style.

shut the door and let go

lover, please stay

when all is said and done

our love will guide us home

will the pain stop (if we go deeper)

Do you respond to comments?

I try to respond to as many as I can! Sometimes I run out of words to say (communication has never been my strong suit) but I read every single one and they always make me smile.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

will the pain stop (if we go deeper)

This is the most I have ever projected my personal experience onto a fic. I was going through a breakup at the time and not handling it very well, and writing a breakup fic really helped me cope with it at the time.

I'm doing much better now, and my ex and I are on good terms. Even though the ending to the fic itself was angsty, I'd like to imagine that the characters are doing better now as well.

What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics tend to have happy endings, but if I had to pick the most satisfying happy ending it would be lover, please stay.

Most of this fic is pretty angsty, but the ending makes it all worth it I think!

Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully I haven't received any nasty comments. I did receive a kind of weird comment once, but I completely forget what it even was.

Do you write smut?

I never did before I got into the shameless fandom, and then I kind of went crazy with it after that.

Craziest crossover:

I've never written a crossover before. It's not something I've ever considered or even know if I would want to do.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Hopefully not!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Many times with my ex, back when we were still dating. It was a lot of fun and definitely something I'd like to try again in the future! I've always enjoyed collaborating with other people.

All time favorite ship:

Favorite ship I've written for? Tarlos. Favorite ship I've never written for? Tiva, aka Tony and Ziva from ncis. I also love Densi (Deeks and Kensi) from ncis la.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have not written a chaptered fic in years and it is something I would really like to do. I have several ideas including a detective au that I've floated between two separate fandoms, but I still haven't been able to make any progress regarding those wips.

What are your writing strengths?

Angst and introspection! I love getting into a character's head and psychoanalyzing them (I am a psych student, after all 😂) and I also love writing sad shit. I'm a sucker for pain, it seems.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Transitions. We all know them, we all loathe them.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

If it makes sense for the situation/characters, of course! I wouldn't go overboard with it though, since I don't actually speak any other languages myself.

First fandom you wrote in:

Minecraft youtube, but like the old school kind. Around 2014-2015ish. And I physically wrote everything down in little journals. Fanfic was only something that existed in my head at the time until I discovered the likes of ff.net.

Favorite fic you've written:

My most recent fic always becomes my favorite, and that holds true today too!

My push coda, my baby, our love will guide us home.

This is something I'm incredibly proud of, and it's also my longest fic to date and something I wasn't sure I would ever be able to finish. I'm still kind of in disbelief that it's finally real.

Tagging (with no pressure ofc) @strandnreyes @carlos-in-glasses @freneticfloetry @welcometololaland and @lemonlyman-dotcom

I do remember this tag going around a few months ago so if you've already done this, you can either do it again if you want to or just accept this virtual hug from me. 🫂

[ghostfanwriter]

Hiiiii! I hope you’re thriving rn and experiencing only pleasant things ❤️ I just wanted to check in since it’s been a while but this is in no way an attempt to get an explanation or to force you to come back (or even respond at all). I really love you’re fics and I think you’re extremely talented! Dirty Hands is my fave fic out there and I’m so greateful to you for writing it! You should feel so proud of yourself for your works and creativity. Many people loved them but what’s most important is that you loved them as well! I hope you’re ok and I’m sending you peace and love 😘

- 🐰

It seriously aches so bad when one of you sends me a message about how much you miss my stories... But in a good way, I promise!!! 😭🩷

I've been struggling with a few personal issues, stuff like changing jobs (looking for one, fingers crossed 🤞🏻) and my mental health for the past few months. Mentally it's been a little dreading, with depression and anxiety, but I'm working hard to make progress and having you all checking in (so many of you sent me messages, ily all so much 😭) makes it all so much better and makes me feel really special and loved.

Anxiety made writing hard, though. I love Dirty Hands with all my heart and the idea of writing something for it that wasn't as good as I hoped made me run away from it and let it sit back in my drafts for months. I've made progress and have been writing more lately, but again, I put a lot of pressure on myself to make it as good as I can.

But having you all asking about it and saying so many kind things about my stories makes me melt and quite literally, wanna cry. It shows me that, even if in this microcosm of Tumblr, my stories have meaning to someone. And reading comments, reblogs and messages about it always makes my day just a little bit brighter.

All that to say... I am writing, and I know you're all super kind and overly patient with me, but I'm feeling better now, and I'm ready to trust myself again and get back to writing.

Hopefully the eighth part of Dirty Hands will be coming this weekend, and I'll try to also (as I do some reading to prevent plot holes) edit and fix some stuff on the previous parts. So I'll be reblogging them as I edit 🫶🏻

Maybe this whole sentimental journey doesn't make sense to some of you, "Dude it's literally just fanfiction!". But you all are just so kind and so extremely sweet that I can't help but really see each and every single one of you as my friends, who are always there to cheer me up when I post something. So thank you all, really. You have no idea how actually meaningful (and quite lifesaving) it is to read your words of encouragement, I can really feel the love from here 🥹

Becoming a writer is a big, huge dream of mine, and having my little friends from over here being so nice gives me the courage I need to pursue it professionally 🩷

I love you all and I can't wait to share more with you, see you soon!

Love, Ghost 🩷🫶🏻

[trkstrnd]

in my humble opinion there is no reason to continue to complain about a plot that has been resolved poorly. it takes so much energy to sit there and be negative and talk about why it bothers you about the thing you’re supposed to enjoy. that’s the thing with this show. as a fandom, we collectively understand that the writers aren’t always going to write what we like, and we can give or take anything to or from the show that we like or dislike, so why are we spending so much time on the dislike? it’s fiction, at the end of the day, no matter how much the actors or writers are adamant that it’s real to them. they’re taking what they get and playing it in stride, and we are watching it. we have the power, as a human being, to take what we need and leave the rest, and yet every time i log in i see people continuing to complain about things that we should simply move past, because no matter how much we hate it, it will not change. canon is canon.

i recently did a project for my film and television analysis class about audience reception, and we talked a bit about how, many times, fandoms can see or create things that aren’t there, or latch onto things that they think they can do better (which, let’s be honest, we can, but we don’t have a job in the writers room and even if we did we would be getting abused by higher ups (im so proud of the writers guild okay)). We talked about how it can almost become an obsession within and obsession. we watched a documentary in fandom and how some people incorporate it into their lives in a healthy way, and some people, not so much, and i think, especially in this fandom (which i am keeping vague so other fandoms can use this post to convey their feelings if they like), the line is incredibly blurred.

in this class, we also watched Paris Is Burning, which is representative of queer movements in the twentieth century, and we talked about backlash the film got, because the representation wasn’t quite positive with everyone exhibited in the doc. We had a lengthy discussion about how oftentimes, queer theory in media isn’t necessarily pretty, and when queer filmmakers came out of the gate, they showed these ugly, messy, real stories so they could exhibit the humanity and progress that these stories made.

Sometimes people make mistakes; a lot of times, things and conversations happen offscreen, and if you’re going to latch on to one storyline and let it ruin your overall view of the season or piece of media as a whole (when you previously lived it), im not going to tell you what to do, but i will say to try looking at it through a less critical eye.

throughout the season, progress was made. it’s exhibited later in the season, which means there is still a lot we don’t see, to have such a shift like that.

that doesn’t mean it didn’t happen. it means there’s a set amount of time in each episode and there are other storylines going on. we are privileged enough to get the ones we do get (even if they’re not great), so use your imagination! bridge the gap! understand that not everything is sunshine and roses all the time and when it is, it doesn’t necessarily make good prime time tv.

tl; dr: please stop using canon as ur only source of material because there is so much more that we didn’t see!!! tv embraces fandom creativity! and shitting on it all the time isn’t healthy! plus, it makes those of us who moved on and feel okay about it feel really fucking shitty <3

[abundancewithher]

hi stars and hearts! mimi here, and I hope you all are doing well today. I took a bit of a break honestly unintentionally but I’m grateful for the break i had, now it’s time for me to be consistent. I kind of had writers block, I had no idea what to post or to talk about even though I have a list of topics to discuss.

It just didn’t feel genuine to talk about the things on my list at the time and I want this to be an enjoyable topic for me to talk about and for others to read. but right now I am going to start a show on Netflix about finances. it’s called how to get rich, I will keep you guys updated and hopefully I’ll like it and it’ll help me out.

but I would like to talk about some thing I decided I’m going to do starting today. I have decided to challenge myself for the month of August to expand who I am and what I would like to become. it has been on my mind to do a goals list for the month of August and I finally did it today which I am very happy and proud of.

I broke it down into different categories so that I can tackle it with ease and not feel overwhelmed by the things that I wrote down. The categories are; health, work/socials, home, personal, fun/activities, and money! we all know that this account is to document my progress and hopefully influence other young women to become the better versions of themselves, so I thought it would be very fun to do this and hopefully have others joining this challenge too!

now, I will be updating you guys on this weekly on Saturdays so stay tuned for that! But that is all I would like to say right now because I have to get ready for bedtime.

ttylxoxo, mimi💋

[thelocalmuffin]

well hey!! for the wip asks, how about 🏅and 📥 ? ;)c

🏅 What is something you recently felt proud of in regard to your writing (finished a fic, actually planned for once, etc). I actually have a lot of pride of being able to become a better writer. When I started, it had been years since I had wrote, but now I see my current progress and am proud of it. I have gotten better at handling feedback and structure.

📥 What is your fave fic to receive comments/messages on? The Masked Apprentice. It's an older fic but someone went out of their way about a few months ago to tell me how the story personally moved them and it brought me to literal tears.

Thanks for sending the ask!

[yuriisclumsy]

[Update!]

Hi, lovelies! It's been a hot-second since I posted anything here in the blog. I wanted to update you guys so you know I'm still alive and not 7-feet under :). There are a couple of things that have happened in the last two months, hence my long absence from Tumblr. It's nothing bad, I promise. If anything its been great!

[Udre you can skip this part and go straight to the bottom if you don't want to read it :)].

If you guys remember, last month I said I'd go on hiatus because of finals and would come back after shortly after they were done but...I had a few other things coming up that left me unable to write due to time (and a MASSIVE writer's and artist's block; talk about perfect timing...).

For one, I am now officially a US citizen 🥳🎉! That was my Christmas present for 2024, apart from going with my dad to an American Football match that my brother couldn't go because of a cold, so I went in his stead. My favorite thing was my dad's comments through the game: "Congratulations for becoming a citizen!" and "This is the American dream!" I left the stadium with a proud dad and better understanding of how American Football works.

After my successful upgrade in status, I had boring check ups with doctors, and then Christmas and New Year's came (EPIC the Musical was the peek of the last week of the year in my humble opinion), I started the new spring semester, had family members visit our corner of the world, and now my birthday is literally next week. The fact that I'll be 19 is wild to me. Crazy how time flies by. I feel old...

So, yeah. Been a little busy.

Now, my blog.

I didn't just sit around doing Nothing the pass month and a halt. I did some writing, with the occasional drawing sessions. I'm also almost done with the next two arcs of the Divine City, and did some more brain storming for my other series, and future ones (I know I'm crazy). I have a few new characters that are works in progress, but they can stay that way since they're for the Devine City's Chapter. Which is...a long time from now 😅.

Aside from that...I've had not one, not two, but three writer's crisis, where I've just debated if I should rewrite the whole of The Divine City for the sixth time or completely abandon it. Though I feel like the bane of my problem is the last chapter. I ducking hate it man. I'm more exited for the surprise I have for the next chapter, but I can't write it because I have to fix the mess I made before I can move on 😭😭. How lovely.

Final note: don't expect me to upload a bunch of stuff for the next few months, even if I've never been one to constantly upload on the blog, just keep that in mind. What I will try is post more drabbles and doodles. I feel like it would be better for me.

Anyhow, thank you all for reading this, I hope you all have a great rest of the day, night, morning, or evening!

[For my moot]

I have finished Lyla's design! I'll upload it to my blog later today so you can see it. You'll like her overall look, clothes, and color scheme much better that the precious one, I'll tell you that much. And a little heads up, the next two arcs will be about the Academies lore and "Demes". I think you'll appreciate knowing more about the schools that the girls go to. ALSO I'll be updating the map of the city. It won't happen for a while, but I'll give you a heads up when I do!

@udretlnea

[elsthought]

Disclaimer: This monologue is based on the writer's imagination yet some parts of it were dedicated to her previous experience.

I Am Beautiful

Monologue

Next month, Miss Gingoog 2025 screenings begin. Hmm, I need to practice now. How should I ramp? It should be like this: (singing "Introduction"—ramp) No, no, no, look at your back! You're like a walking camel! I remember how the gay coach my classmate joining a pageant last year said 'breast out' (breast out), 'butt out' (butt out), 'chin up' (chin up) and walked like this. Be confident! How about practicing my Q&A? I wonder one of the judges would ask me, "Candidate No. 8 what inspired you to join this pageant?" Well, I should answer like this, "Thank you, ma'am. The struggles in my barangay motivate me. I am standing here as a spokesperson, aiming to raise awareness about our community's needs: inadequate infrastructure, particularly roads, limited resources like water, and poverty. This prompts a call to unity and collective progress. I believe by working together to address local issues, we can foster a thriving barangay, progressive city, and ultimately, developed country. Thank you. Lourdes Besande, Bagubad! (turn and walk but tripped over) Ouch! 

Then my mama heard the dashing noise after I tripped over and said, "What are you doing there, Lourdes? Can't you see our house is flimsy? You would build one if this house collapse! I feel her voice is getting near, and she would see me what I am doing right here. There my mother is. "My goodness, Lourdes! Are you daydreaming again? Take off now those heels, or else I will strike that at you! If you will join that nonsense pageant aside from the fact that you don't have a sponsor, try to look at yourself! Many beautiful, intelligent, and wealthy candidates competing there have a high chance of winning while you? I don't know. It would be a shame for us. You better get this bolo and cut the grasses of our neighbor's backyard so you can help me earn a living. (Then mother left.)

Mama, I do have my sponsor. My Ninang encouraged me to join. Many beautiful candidates, intelligent and wealthy, while me? Yes, I'm poor, but that doesn't mean I can't compete. But does Mama mean I can't compete because I'm stupid for her? Well, she's never been proud of my achievements at school. "What's this? 2nd honor only? not first? for her 2nd honor in class is still stupid. But, does she also mean I'm not beautiful?" I'm not. I remember when my brother says, "Look at me, I'm very handsome; Ate's face is different." I wonder what's wrong when my classmate laughed at my face during our graduation pictorial. "HAHAHA," a mocking laugh of our neighbor when I answered her that my dream profession is to become a stewardess. She just said, "Nah, only those beautiful can become stewardess." There was a time when a committee chose me as a candidate that would represent our barangay. I heard one of their members whisper, "Are you sure with our candidate? Could we win? Her nose, her skin, she's not beautiful. She's not suited for a beauty contest." 'Lourdes' they say, an old-fashioned name not suited for pageantry. There's a guy, "I like you. Please stay with me. I need you." I thought he's admiration was real, but I found out he only likes me because I wear a mask. It was pandemic that time. After I helped him with his projects and assignments, he left me like a toy. You, you, all of you see me the same. 

But as Christina Aguilera's song says, "I am beautiful no matter what they say. Words can't bring me down."

Why are people like that? I see them all beautiful, but everyone sees me ugly. Do you know what beautiful truly means? It can't be defined by just looking at someone's physical appearance. Physically appealing and beautiful are not the same. Because a beautiful person has a humble mind and a kind heart. I believe I have those qualities, so I'm beautiful. Maybe the one you see as different or out of your standard of beauty is not called ugly but unique. No one can say someone is ugly because there's no ugly creation of God. All of us are beautiful in our own unique ways. 

(Talking to herself) If everyone sees you ugly, I'm here to say you're uniquely beautiful. A crown suits you. 

[noblest-roman-of-them-all]

Hey there, Dr. Picani.

What a year it has been since I last wrote to you. I wanted this letter to have a bit more energy and oopmh to it, but I'm afraid I don't that in my right now. I still wanted to wish you a happy birthday though, so

Happy Birthday!

I know in the first letter I mentioned how you helped me feel a little less afraid of the concept of therapy and that helped me get started in therapy and I even went to group therapy for a while. But then I moved and my therapist went on sabbatical and I've done some self therapy, done a little bit of book work, done some reading, I even done a little bit of art therapy on my own!

But I think you know where this is going...I'm kind of afraid to go back to therapy again. It's going to be a lot of new things and this time I'd be going into it with some...pretty hefty diagnoses. And I don't really know what to expect anymore. I'm gonna be honest, part of me just wishes you could be my therapist. As a writer myself I really appreciate your use of stories in therapy it does make it a lot easier to externalize and process that way.

I...kinda feel like Aang. I have doubt about whether or not I'm capable of being who I need to be, but for myself. But I also know that I am capable of growth, even if I'm not that person now, I can become them. I don't always believe it, but I know it. And I know that because of the lessons you've taught me.

It...maybe a little while before I'm really ready to take on therapy again, as much as I know I could use the support, I'm still a little afraid of it. But in the mean time, I'm going to continue using the resources I have on hand, I'm going to do my best to be mindful of my beliefs about myself, and I'm going to continue to create the art that I love. And I'm going to do it all knowing that even if you can't actually be my therapist, that you'd be proud of me. That you'd be supportive and encouraging of my growth and progress, however small it is or seems to be. And that helps and it means a lot to me.

So on your birthday, I want to say thank you so, so much for every lesson you've taught me and for believing in me. I have a sneaking suspicion that your birthday wish for me might be to get the help I need, just a guess based off your talk with Elliot, and I will work on looking into it soon. But for now, happy birthday and I hope you can get one of those cartoon looking cakes. You definitely deserve it.

And thank you to @thatsthat24 for sharing this wonderful character ans series with all of us. This series has truly, truly made my life so much better.

[myaquariusheart]

15/11

I am feeling extremely low right now, not even right now for the past few days actually. The last time I felt pure joy was when I was watching the previous few episodes of Ghost that got leaked. I wrote a review on it but saved it in drafts, it needs some work done honestly. I haven't felt that excited or happy in a long time and I just wonder why. I'm rewatching JoJo so I can understand it better, I'm always watching it and not paying attention, and then I'm about 50 episodes in and I don't know anyone's name, or what's even happening in the plot. I started from episode 3, as I've watched 1 and 2 so many times, and after that, everything becomes a blur. After Dio has the stone mask and kills Jonathan's dad my concentration just flutters away like a butterfly someplace else. Jonathan and his dad are such lovely and forgiving people, even after Dio stabbed his dad, George, he forgave Dio on his deathbed, only God and the writers know why because he doesn't even deserve it because he doesn't even care. Battle after battle Jonathan still forgives Dio and even grieves him, maybe because he does see him as his brother, but he killed your dad, what's the worth of forgiving him. Even in death, Dio doesn't want peace for you. Still to this day, I don't understand Dio's problem, they took you in after your dad died and you just want to do them dirty for what reason? If I also hear Hamon one more time I'm going to go crazy but at least that's done with after a few seasons. Anyway, today I had work around 11:30 and I don't know I how still managed to be late? I'm so awful and don't know how to fix this, I've always been at least 10 mins late to every single job, Hibagon, Well Being, even Cabana I was always there after the time I'm supposed to be, I don't know what's wrong with me or if I'm actually cursed with the late curse, even though I made that up. Even when I try to wake up early and do everything right something else happens to stop me. I remember during Jury Service I was always so late and the day I woke up extra early to be there on time, the bus was canceled and I had to get an Uber there which cost me so much and I never even got to get that money back. I even got scammed today but thankfully the bank gave me all my money back. I opened a Depop account to help out A, and some girl was interested in buying the glasses, I have no idea how to use Depop and stupidly gave her my details and she managed to scam me £400!!! I was sitting with A and he knew something was wrong, thankfully the bank saw it as something unusual and contacted me straight away, so I managed to report them, block my card and order a new one and get my money back. It was scary and so embarrassing I couldn't believe it. It's all dealt with and I managed to make a Paypal account that's connected to the Depop, just need to educate myself on online selling. I went to the gym after with Cake, it was a good session and we are trying our best to push each other, she has better resilience than me and I'm really proud of her progress. I just hope we can see more in the next few months, it's only been 1 month and the progress can properly be seen in about 6 months. So we need to keep pushing ourselves and go as much as possible. I'm planning to go to Oxford this weekend and spend some time with Boyn, literally got off the phone with her now and my tickets are all booked and I'm so excited to go!!!

[slayingfiction]

What would your advice for just-starting-out young authors be?

I love new writers! I’ve never known a better way to escape my reality and live a thousand different lives.

I started writing when I was young, maybe 12 or 13 years old. I am now 25, and very much consider myself to be a child, but still, in my 10+ years of personal writing and classes, here are some of the best tips I can give anyone who is new to writing, regardless of age.

Read. Read. Read. Then read some more. The easiest and fastest way to learn how to write is by reading and studying how other people have written their stories. Study their balance of dialogue vs description vs action. Study the words they use and what they’re choosing to describe. Study the scenes that make you feel something, or pull you to the story even more, and dissect it until you understand how to do it.

Daydream. At night, in the morning, before and after school, during school, during work. When people are trying to talk to you, just daydream. Image worlds with populated moons. Imagine worlds with multiple human-like species all living in the same area. Image a boy who goes home and cries to his adoptive vampire parents, and girls who practices knife throwing every night to prepare for the apocalypse that no one sees coming. Dream of everything and anything because that’s how you keep and improve your creativity. Eventually you may even write something with it.

Write for yourself. Always start by writing what you enjoy, and love your characters and your stories. Everything about your first draft should be because you love the story, not what other people like. You will never please everyone, so start with yourself, and build a community with the ones who love your story as much as you do.

Do it on your own timeline. If you want to write a book in a month, edit the next and publish right after, do it. If you want to write the first five chapters of 8 books without finishing, do it. If, like me, you want to write your first novel at 18 years old, and 7 years later still not feel ready to publish, that’s ok! You are not falling behind anyone else, you are exactly where you should be on your own path.

Practice. Your writing will improve with practice, that’s how it works, it’s how it always works. No way to skip right to publishing a first draft and becoming famous for it. Practice and just keep writing, you will improve.

Challenge yourself. While you may love fantasy or romance, or maybe all your story ideas are too big for only one book and they all end up being series’, you need to try new things. Write a mystery short story. Write poetry on how you feel. Write one page on how you could survive a zombie apocalypse as long as you have your coffee in the morning, it doesn’t matter, just try new things. Trying new things is how I wrote this haiku: Take a deep inhale, Breathe fresh air into my lungs, I savorfreedom. Is it the greatest haiku ever? No, but it makes me happy, and reminds me that I can write, good or bad, and still be proud of myself.

Keep all your projects. Good or bad. Look back on them years later and think, yeah that was terrible, at least I’m better now. Or maybe think, this wasn’t as bad as I thought it was. It’s a progressive journey. You can take your time. DONT EVER SHAME YOUR YOUNGER SELF FOR THEIR WORK. THEY TRIED THEIR HARDEST AND WROTE AS BEST THEY COULD. WE ARE PROUD OF OURSELVES, NOT EMBARRASSED OR SHAMED. Whether the work is from years ago or days go. Be kind to yourself, no one else owes you that.

Compare. Compare to popular novels, compare to your friends stories or to people online. Compare and see if your character are developed enough, or if your story makes sense, or if it’s relatable. When comparing however, keep in mind that your written style will be different than all others writers. Your first novel will not be the same as an author’s 10th book that just went viral on TikTok. It takes practice and time. Compare for style, technique, structure and plot. Not for popularity, worth, importance, and don’t feel down thinking that someone writing at a higher grade level makes them better, it doesn’t.

Share your work. If you are embarrassed, use a pen name. That’s perfectly fine. Put your work out there and get feedback. Having one person saying your story is (negative criticism here) is going to happen, don’t freak out. It doesn’t mean your story is flawed and should be tossed. If most people are saying that, then maybe it’s time to revisit the story and plot. Getting feedback from people reading your story is important, you want to ask specific questions so you don’t get generic answers. Get real reviews from real people, the mean voice in your head doesn’t get a say.

Learn the difference between perfect and done. I know, I know. Perfectionists around the world just scoffed and thought ‘I would if I could’. Here’s the thing, it’ll never be perfect. A word won’t be right, you can’t find the right way to convey an emotion, your choice of vocabulary isn’t up to your standards, I get it. You want your work to be absolute perfection so that everyone loves it and no one can say a bad thing about it, but it doesn’t work that way. Instead make it to ‘complete’, then nitpick some details, then it’s done. Done is good, it’s where you want to be.

Self-publishing? Pay for a professional editor and a graphic designer. It makes a difference, I promise.

There’s lots of others, but I would say as a writer-starter-pack, these should get you started, then you will learn lessons all on your own, or find them as you’re writing later on. Truly, just have fun, and the rest will come with time.

Happy Writing!

[hazelnut-u-out]

EPISODE REVIEW TIMEEE:

(contains spoilers for "a rick in king mortur's mort")

i actually really loved that episode. i've been so fucking starved for morty content that this was really nice. i loved the callbacks, parallels, and contrasts that were drawn pretty clearly between this episode and "the vat of acid episode." TVOAE is actually one of the episodes that makes me the sickest to my stomach. it's so unsettling and bone chilling to watch.

this episode, on the other hand... this felt earned.

(perhaps because of my morty bias and the fact that i've gotten basically no morty this season, buuuuut...) i'm giving this one a 10/10???

wow... didn't think i'd go that far, but uhhhh... yeah. i went there.

it just mastered the art of parallels, callbacks, and development beautifully.

my initial thoughts, as always:

(this is a long one… yk how i am with morty…)

-morty acted so much like early-series rick at the beginning that i was honestly a little bit ready to accept that part of his character progression is becoming a mini-rick. to be honest, i still see that being a possibility, but this was... not exactly that.

he still took the sword for a reason early-series rick would have instead of a classic "these guys seem cool" morty reason ("oh shit these other guys want the sword so now i want the sword, even if i'm jaded and cynical about it"), and it almost felt like the "rick and morty" dynamic was flipped a little bit- as in, morty being the rigid jerk and rick being berated verbally for a second. that being said, morty was still childishly excited about being a medieval knight and it was cleared up that morty was only being rude to rick initially as a trauma response. he expected rick to abuse him, but that wasn't the case. when he realized he was safe, he let his guard down.

(look at him sulking in line awww)

-RICK USING MORTY PET NAMES. RICK USING MORTY PET NAMES.

i think a little part of me melted when he called morty "lil junebug."

SHUT THE FUCK UP- i am so unwell. so mentally normal about that.

i genuinely cannot believe that's a canon nickname rick uses for morty. that. is. so. cute.

just the sweetest lil pet name.

(plus grandpa rick putting a hand on his lil junebug's shoulder, because why not?)

-OMFG RICK APOLOGY?? like genuinely?? oh my god??

i mean... that was still kinda dickish lol. "i'm gonna intentionally do the least amount possible to actually change, but make you feel like i am."

you know what, though? bc of the fact that this is essentially a follow-up to TVOAE, i'd say the entire premise of this ep WAS change, and highlighted that... so i'm giving the undercut a pass.

-i also liked the subtle callback to the "auto park feature" with the sword "fighting deacon frost." i liked that morty didn't think it was cool, but it didn't trigger some insane reaction in rick.

he's just like, "i dunno... i thought it was cool... :(" and he moves on.

-"holy shit, this is who i am to this kid?!... i've gotta fix this!"

and then he... actually puts in the work to better a real human connection instead of manipulating morty to keep him pliant?

wow.

-like i said, rick is still being a fucking dick here and there in the convo, but i'm genuinely proud of him.

-i'm also so happy for morty. this must have been such a healing experience for him. god. he's been through so much. shoutout to the writers for not putting him through more emotional abuse for fun.

-another bit that made me think that morty is slowly developing into a little rick was the moment where he uses a science lecture to ruin the knights' faith in their culture. during that whole sequence, he does sound a lot like rick...

-SPACE BETH CHILLING WITH HER GIRLFRIEND, GUYS.

-RICK BRAGGING ON MORTY ABOUT THE LITTLE LECTURE! THE HANDS ON THE SHOULDERS! EVERYTHING!

this reminds me of an ask i answered a little bit ago where i talked about rick being morty's primary caregiver. this episode felt a lot more like a father/son type development than a grandfather/grandson.

i get that the rest of the family was proud of morty, but rick was the one saying "hey! this is the little dude i'm raising! look at him go!"

-i was a little nervous that morty was going to kill/let rick kill the knights, which would have meant that he's veeeery similar to rick now, but he chose not to. that was a nice touch.

-(i thought the little moment where jerry was like "what's happening? appliances are breaking that i haven't touched!" was funny hehe..)

-i thought it was sweet that rick got the meeting's attention just to give morty the floor.

-i wasn't a fan of morty begging rick to stop supporting him, though. it felt like punching the underdog character with his own fist, but i guess i like it better in hindsight because it shows yet another trauma response. morty doesn't trust himself AT ALL. he thinks that by doing this his way, something will inevitably go wrong. damn.

-i also liked the little details about how witchy rick can be, haha. first, we see him ACTUALLY bend down and read the bones himself, then the witchcraft penis? that was a nice touch. rick definitely has an interest in witchcraft.

-(one of my favorite songs as a kid was "ruby tuesday," and i got so excited that the montage song was a cover of it, but... alas... no.)

(i just thought mort looked cute here lol)

-THE HUG? (of course they had to make it less heavy with the "we're gonna make your dick so fake," comment, but it's so nice to see rick hug morty and try to calm him down.)

-TELEPATHY? WHAT THE FUCK? THAT THREW ME SO HARD I GOT WHIPLASH.

-shit, man....

"i love you."

"i love you, too..."

-as soon as morty asked rick if he was a robot/clone, i was on the edge of my seat, chewing my lip, biting my nails, pulling my hair- waiting for the reveal that he was, but...

they didn't fake us out! hey! :)

(will say that the "this family has enough clones and robots in it" comment did make me a lil nervous, bc we KNOW of a clone, but... uhhh... who's the "robot"?)

-one of my biggest issues with "rick: a mort well-lived" was that marta stayed in the game, meaning that the only part of morty that heard rick say he loved and respected him didn't join with our morty. it bothered me that our morty didn't get to hear that.

i'm so happy that they fixed that this ep. MORTY HEARD RICK IS PROUD OF HIM. MORTY HEARD RICK LOVES HIM. i hope this is the "morty gets the grandpa he deserves" beginning. i'm loving it, and hope it's far more than just 22% of the time.

overall, AHMAZING EPISODE! kinda sad we had to wait until the end of the season to get a decent in-depth exploration of morty, his current character, and his reaction to rick's healing, but i'm so glad my boy got his apologies. he got his "i love you." he got his "i'm proud of you." he got is hug.

he got his autonomy.

congrats, lil junebug.

hope ya get more <3

[calaisreno]

2022: Writing Year in Review

This year I posted 19 stories, less than my usual, but that was one of my goals. I'm satisfied with what I wrote.

I'm most proud of posting The Last Envoy because that story had been in the works for years and it was time to figure it out and share it. Doing that was a great writing experience and a great fandom experience for me. I'm so grateful to everyone who read it and let me know what it meant to them.

[I also read a lot of stories this year and added authors to my list of favorites. I'll share those in another post.]

My writing goal for 2022 was to post less. Not because I am bowing out of the fandom, tired of writing, or hoping to become a 'real, published writer.' (*sarcasm: fanfiction IS real writing. Fight me.)

I wanted to post less because I needed to write differently and that required a new mental attitude. According to my Scrivener writing history, I actually wrote as many words in 2022 as I have in past years; I simply haven't posted them all. (They are steeping, or ripening, or whatever first drafts do when you leave them be for a while.)

One of the ways I learned to write was simply by writing a ton of stories and posting most of them. This is the Just Get Over Yourself and Do It School of Writing. I've been in the Sherlock fandom on AO3 for five years now, and I've written far more than the 133 stories and 1.6 M words I've posted. I'm proud of some stories, and I cringe at others. They all stay up for anyone to read because in writing them, I became better; they are a record of progress.

But writing well isn't the only goal of writing. Nor are numbers the goal (words, stories, hits, kudos, comments). As I consider where I'm going with my writing this year, I remind myself why I write:

To tell a story I'm excited to tell.

To try out something new that might not succeed, but I just want to see if I can do it.

To thank someone who's been supportive by writing something they will love.

To start a conversation with readers.

To get something out of my system.

To have fun writing a story that's just fun to write.

To work out feelings about something that happened, either in RL or fiction.

To imitate something I admire.

It's a new year! I've got stories in progress, but I'm not making goals. Working on goals implies that "done" is more important than "doing," that "being a writer" is more rewarding than "becoming a writer." For me, goals do not produce joy. If I have to make a goal, it is to carry on becoming a writer, and (I hope) never actually arriving. Being is not as much fun as becoming. Well, if I have to have a goal, it will be to have fun writing in 2023.

As Ao would say (quoting Ursula Le Guin): "It is good to have an end to journey towards; but it is the journey that matters, in the end."

I'd love to hear your reflections on the year just ended or goals you have for the new one. Tagging a few; probably not all I should tag; consider yourself tagged.

@totallysilvergirl @thetimemoves @discordantwords @therealsaintscully @shiplocks-of-love  @sherlockwatson-holmesblog @jobooksncoffee @keirgreeneyes @raina-at @7-percent  @a-different-equation @shelleysprometheus  @helloliriels @blogstandbygo @jrow @mydogwatson @momma2boys @thegildedbee @copperplatebeech