#I am no motivated enough for that lmao
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Shout-out to me (got sick and then immediately also bruised/cut my hand reaching under a car) :]
#spotatalk#I was gonna doodle something silly butttt#I am no motivated enough for that lmao#luckily the bruise isn't like... stopping me from using my hand it just ouchies if I set it again something stupid-style lol#i'm having a time but!!!!#it's fine!!
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for @chanonara <3
#svtgifs#svtcreations#svtsource#forsvt#fywonwoo#seventeen#the video you sent quite literally got me over the giffinf slump LMAO#or at least gave me enough motivation to make one set LMAO#i might finally make a wonu set who knows not me!#wait fuck i didn't even tag the members yet oopsie#chan#wonwoo#i am ignoring how different the coloring looks in every one of these i simply do not see#b.edits
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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible
#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything#i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by#while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi#i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real#problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about#and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real#or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason#i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place#because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk#negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed#a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO#i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait#and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life#like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it#just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy#i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy#and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation#because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life#anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is#to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck
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hey hi hello! first of all i'd like to say i took your patron saint uquiz and it. Changed my life unironically it's so good. i follow you now because every line in that quiz was a gut punch and i loved it. top tier hurt honestly
my question is this - i am a fanauthor. on the side i also write my own original fiction but i specialize in fanfic. Am I allowed to use your poetry for a reference folder? I wouldn't use your poetry in a fic without explicit permission and without linking back here of course, and I'd never use it for commercial work outside of maybe taking inspiration without copying, but I wanna have a ref folder of Things That Made Me Feel Things about a character. It's not planned to be public as of yet, it's just supposed to be a bunch of screenshots in my drafts, but I'd like to maybe one day make it public once the fic was complete. (I already have your blog linked in my drafts actually, so if it goes public I'm not gonna forget.) I just want to make sure you're comfortable with me using your poetry for fanfic of all things
It's cool if not and have a great day! I still think your poetry is great and evocative and all
hi, anon! you're all good, i prommy. so glad you like the quiz + the poetry, and i would always prefer people come and ask questions if they're uncertain! no trouble at all.
my general stance is that as long as it's clearly credited, i am totally cool with my work being used in personal projects. like you said, i've got a tag for the things that people make! i love to see what people create. if it's for a noncommercial creative project then i would say there's no need to ask beforehand (unless it would make you more comfortable to ask, in which case go ahead and i'll almost certainly say yes <3). my only thing is that if you post it, please tag me in it/send it to me so that i can reblog it here for people to see!
if there are any questions about using my work that anyone has, feel free to ask. i don't think i've got anything particular going on outside of common practice! same way you'd treat, like, a richard siken poem or smth: you wanna credit it so that people can find the source material, and make sure you're not using it for profit unless you have an understanding with that author. i trust you all to be decent about it <3 kiss kiss go out and make your cool little things so that i can be delighted and amazed with them
#extremely selfish motivations i think you should all go make things with my poems cause i love to look at them#collecting them on the blog like pretty rocks to look at every so often#except instead of rocks they are like. beautiful pieces of creative work.#i just think it's so cool that you can take one set of words and then use them to create something new. isn't language and art awesome#anyway trust you all! except that one person who copied my. quiz questions. of all things. girl come onnnnnnnnnnn#would've said you could absolutely use my quiz for inspo as long as you credited me somewhere... that's all that it comes back to...#anyway. i'm bigger than someone using my really unique and awesome quiz questions on uquiz dot com. (<— affirmations)#do i need an FAQ? i feel like i'm assembling enough topics to warrant an FAQ.#something to think about...#ask#not poetry#OH MAN ALSO. FORGOT TO SAY IN THE ORIGINAL POST. fanfic is so totally cool with me. i write fanfic lmao#if you are an astute observer... and you know how to get to my main account... my ao3 link is there you can read me for filth#this is halfway a trick question cause my main account is so incredibly easy to find and if you've taken the quiz you saw it#unless you came here straight from like. uquiz. and didn't see the tumblr post. in which case WHOA.#... people know that it's just my main account posting the quizzes right. like the matching usernames make that clear??#just occurred to me that it might cause some confusion. whateverrrrrrr as i said no shame in fanfiction i love to see it haha#making no promises cause i am so bad at watching media and probably won't know what it's about anyway#but chances are pretty good that i'd read the fic if you sent it to me. non-zero for sure#(<— guy who wants to see people using his stuff for creative work so so so so so so so fucking bad)
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crazy to think that i started this blog stressing about going to uni and now i’m graduating in less than a month
#and the fact that i’ve actually met some cool people off this site that i’m genuinely friends with now#hehe love y’all#and everyone else who’s stuck around thank you <3#hiding this in the tags just because: i am genuinely happier than i’ve ever been since starting this blog#and that is mainly because of my life outside of tumblr—work school and friends and all#and so i’ve been directing alot to my time and energy towards them because again with the interaction rate on this app#at least outside of tumblr my time and energy is appreciated a bit more#sure i’m not writing fanfics to my irl but ykwim#that being said i do like to pop in on here from time to time#but writing has been something tahts just been pushed to the deep corners of my mine#partly because of school but also due to lack of energy or motivation to actually write#i have so many drafts of bareky complete drabbles but that’s about as far as my writing can go atm#so we’ll see if that spark comes back for anyone who’s still here lmao#anyways#enough of me yapping. just wanted to share a thought and then some#if you’re still here: i hope you’re doing well :)#jen rambles
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guys, I just want to let yall know that I haven't forgotten about my hoshis smau and my piwon serieeee. I'm gonna focus on these two now (+ on the niki's fic) ଘ(੭*ˊᵕˋ)੭* ̀ˋ
(PIWON ASKS I DIDN'T FORGET ABOUT YOU EITHER🤭)
#i haaate leaving things unfinished#idk why my motivation was so low for those :(#jwzkwjdjwj i am getting it back now#no matter if my works flop#i will keep writing and finish them bc i enjoy writing them#ugh writers on tumblr i promise i get you#i even just started uni#and im in a new city#you will def see me more complaining about it herre#anyway i yapped enough#i want to write more#but it's getting late here lmao#goodnight everyone!!!#☆ rose's rambling
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The write a thon theme in October is Hyrule so this will be perfect for another Lanayrulie hehe
#daily bailey#I don't have a whole lot of writing motivation now lmao#but i have a few ideas for lanayrulie and/or funny tales#also you might be wondering if I will write stuff with ravio#well my answer is maybe!#ravio is a very new obsession and so i am not confident enough to write him in a fic just yet hehe#also motivation is down the drain#ive been kinda taking a break from writing other than write a thons#but expect more headcanons and stuff
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me puttingon the filters "remote" and "data science major" on this job site from my university and just scrolling thru and applying to a ton that don't need cover letter without reading the qualifications/requirements 😀
#data science major is enough LMAO i'm slightly qualified at least right#if they get back to me i can read/reconsider LOL#bitch has to write a goddamn cover letter at some point tho lmfao#tmrw i'm getting together w my friend who also needs to apply for jobs i'll surely write a cover letter then right for shore#bro there's this unpaid internship that is like pretty fitting for me#but it's fucking unpaid which is so annoying lmfao#didn't realize it was unpaid until today (i saw it like yesterday lmao)#anyway looked at my email and reminded that i have to reply to an email abt a job i actualy have rn lmao 😭#and just didn't do this semester#but i want/need to get back to it#but i've spent the last week rotting and doing absolutely nothing#idk where the motivation to do things is gonna come from LOL but we gotta do it#i gotta put work time like scheduled out in my gcal or smth to make myself actually do it :\#and even then it probably won't rly happen lol#ig i spent the last while lying here clicking apply -> submit resume to all these jobs that don't need anything else LOL#so i'm not completely doing nothing 😀#i also have done a bunch of club stuff 😀 for the club that i am no longer director for but ya know#i need to wash my hairrrrrrrrrr lmao ;-;#jeanne talks
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@umbrumsol (❌)
It was surprisingly rare to catch Bedeku in such a vulnerable state nowadays. Bad day, simply put. Which added to finding the presence of that... creature, more overwhelming than anticipated.
Their eyes widened a little as they stared at him, their heart nearly skipping a beat upon feeling his claws digging into their chin.
“... R-really...” They spoke up eventually, mostly annoyed at having been caught in that state. They forcefully wiped unshed tears with one hand, while showing a small frown as they tried jerking their head away. “And who may you be to... g-get a kick out of such things...?”
#♡✗ ic#f:💎#umbrumsol#got enough energy and motivation to reply to this 👁️👉👈#needless to say- I am very excited lmao
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Idk its sorta funny that it took me 25 years to really ask for help and I just... completely lost my oldest and closest confidants and then I'm just stuck on the other side like... wow I was really getting physically abused again and they just... abandoned me over love bombing. Usually I try to forgive but... man even if it stopped feeling so raw, and I was able to completely blame myself[both for the initial abuse, and the fallout ensuing from talking about it but fearing being too negative or focusing on myself too much, resulting in ""love bombing""] I just can't see myself actually... engaging with them. Which is fine enough, I closed myself off to everyone including them long before that anyways. I'm certainly a self fulfilling prophecy, I do wish there were less casualties in the meantime.
#sardonic speeches#best part about being bullied by your former friends in elementary is it really just...#cements that people will leave and they wont care when they do so theres no use worrying too much over it#i think 10+ years of the closest thing to friendship i can muster is enough to mourn and grieve over tho lmao#atleast i can use tumblr again without the thinking useless thoughts thing#idk i think ill drop off social media and maybe life in general in a bit tho...#i just... wish i had been self motivated enough to do anything? or talented enough that someone felt i was worth motivating#i mean... my mentor said he was proud of me but he never#idk.#said i was smart or funny or anything?#i can always pretend i am but... man ive never really had shit going for me#which isnt to say i couldnt still do something with myself!! thats the case w plenty of people i just....#lack ambition or motivation and i hate living w myself but uhm... i am myself so other ppl arent into it either#god then add capitalism on top of it and like... bro i dont want to use my labour for a conglomerate.#like... truly glad i didnt go thru school to be in debt for a stem field and have all the research im passionate about not be funded#and then have my findings used for absolute bullshit#hs me was right dissuading myself from shooting for a graduate degree program like epidemiology#idk i just dont trust that companies would release a cure en masse and if i had ever contributed...
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Ate shit on my bike today, 0/10 do not recommend. However it did teach me why layers are important + trust my gut when it comes to my bike. Walked off with stinging hands and a skinned knee thanks to 3 jackets and two pairs of pants... the cold saved me. Fixed the issue, glad I spilled a 5 min walk from the store so was able to find the tool to get the handlebars back in alignment but yea... next time I feel everything shift like that I'm stopping. The all in one bike tool I grabbed seems to work so no worries next time it happens but you bet the ride home + experiencing any turn again was nerve wracking.
#smol's rambles#busting myself to pick up hrt was not on my 2024 bingo but that gave me more motivation to not lose it lmao#just hope the rest of the bike is okay because i have a 5 am shift tomorrow morning and im not going to be awake enough to inspect it fully
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4 more scenes. Then I can type this up. And then. I never have to look at it again.
#writing woes#the final stretch baby. nobody asked for it but. final stretch.#god. please. i want it to be done.#i really hope like at least 1 person thinks its good.#I'm so fucking nervous people will think it sucks. please I'm so nervous. ugh#ughhhhhh i want it off my plate#but i hope. it's good.#i see all the flaws in it. is it ooc? are the characters even close to right? do these motivations make sense?#is this plot point coming out of left field? have i justified my thoughts on including this scene enough?#is any of this earned? is it too long? does it make any sense???#is this anything more that masturbatory self-indulgent nonsense?? does it need to be? (yes)#how do people stand it lmao its so Rough.#i was gonna do at least 1 more pass of edits bc thats what i need to do for my academic works. but god above i am so sick of looking at this#i don't want toooooooooo
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The New Year is upon us!

Thought I’d take a second away from my Good Omens content and chart down some goals I want to work on this year. If you skip, I hope you have a great start to 2024!✨
(content down below:)
Continuing to dive into things I am passionate about, working out a balance in both my professional field of study and personal life (professional: discovering new viola works and engaging with the music-historian mindset, giving myself those opportunities to refresh my love for the instrument and to take some stress away from the demands of the performance route) (personal: continuing to engage with fandom things, aka GOOD OMENS lol, observing/admiring more artworks, etc.)
Protecting my peace. I want to surround myself with good energy and people who will accept me for who I am, and not criticize me for being myself (particularly w family members)
Documenting more things! (whether that is via journaling, pictures/videos), and working to focus on both how the good and bad experiences serve in my growth (as a person and a musician). The second part is a life-long exploratory journey, but one I will always actively work towards improving on, even when I feel that I am in a good place with it.
Give myself more grace, particularly when things are rough and my mind wants to shut out the world. Showing the same kind of compassion and support for myself as I do for others around me.
This year was a pretty hectic time for my life moving forward, going by too fast at times, but I hope 2024 brings in some good times! Cheers🫶✨




(enjoy some 1827 Edinburgh Crowley <3)
#2024 i hope you are a good one#because 2023 was a whole handful to deal with#i'd say there was a strange balance of both good and bad things that happened#(does good omens s2 count as both? 🤣)#lmao no but fr#idec if s2ep6 gave me more crippling depression#i still loved s2 and am even more excited for s3;)#that in itself is enough motivation to keep me going
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I just played through the genshin archon quest and i must say... I did not not like it... I had zero expecations, since i am pretty burned out with the game, and wanted to play to see a bit about fontaine and because childe appeared in the trailer. And i must confess i was pleasantly surprised... Not to say i'll keep playing as much as before, but oh well. If you end up playing or watching womeone else play it, i'd be interested to know what your thoughts are! Anyway, enjoy the weekend clari <3
oh rly!!!!! ugh i saw like,,, that fucking super cute clip of him giving traveler his vision to keep safe or whatever the heck and it made me squee and i am SO mad about it AHAHAHA ughhhh i literally have a post in my drafts where i'm just ranting about how mad i am that hoyoverse diD THIS TO ME grrrrrrr >:c
eventually i do want to play it, at least to see what it’s all about, and i’d be a fuckin’ liar if i said i didn’t miss mr ajax at least a teeny tiny bit (and that seeing him again didn’t make me feel a lil giddy waaah) >.< i’ll def let you know my thoughts tho whenever i do play it!!! i’ll just reblog this post n add onto it! aw anon <33 thank you sweetpea, i hope your weekend went wonderfully!! <3
#i ammmm curious i cannot lie#it's more just like ugh finding the motivation to bust out my computer and start the game n all that#i also like#am terrified it'll suck me back in and i genuinely really don't want it to because i always end up regretting it#and feeling disappointed and unfulfilled and like i've wasted a bunch of time LMAO#anyway~ this needs a tag so i don't lose it#maybe i'll just tag it with#inky.genshin#inky.ajax#that should be enough hehe#thanks for letting me know ur thoughts anon bb!!#please keep safe and stay hydrated <3 enjoy your week ahead!#inky.bb#clari gets mail
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what do u meannnnnnn i'm abt to be post college graduation 🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️🧍🏻♀️
#apparnelty some family friends coming to my graudation#bc ig i'm the first in the generation to graduate or whatever the fuck#and like whatever that's fine but ffs i wish they would've come to my show instead#that i co directed and literally love sos o so oso sosososoososooo much#so so so proud of that#i don't give a shit abt my graduation tbh lmfao TT#so it lowkey doesn't mean much to me that they want to come to my graduation ;-;#it would've meant so fucking much if i knew they would be able to come#and want to see that and i could like suggest hey instead come see this show LMAO#like it probably wouldn't have happened but whatever#also just like i have like no motivation and no interest in stats at this point lmfao#ALSO bc these ppl all gonna be fucking talking abotu and asking abt what i'm doing after#I DON'T KNOWWWWW what i'm fucking doingggggggg#i alr get enough talk from my mom abt how i'm not applying to enough jobs#i dont need family friends to also be asking me and my answer just being ha idk#i'm fucking staying at college tho like on campus bc i'm a fucking loser and don't want to move on#like not rly. i'm kinda trying to see it as like#the alternative would've been me at home being a loser lol#and that would've been so annoying and even if this isn't the 'right' thing to do or most traditional#at least i'm choosing to do it ig#and i get to stay in this club w my bestestestestest friends for another yr#idc if i'm like not moving on when i should LOL too bad for me that's a future problem#and also kinda figure out this weird right after college time period w my friend who i'm rooming with#ok. slay that was. acool turnaround from me lmfao just . yeah ok that's the positive side ig lmao#anyway i also dont give a shit about graduation bc i hate my university rn lmfao :) and the world is burning down#jeanne talks#i am . procrastinating#imagine knowing what the fuck i learned in this class this whole semester#ugh literally two group projects to end on and two of the most boring annoying group project experiences i've had LMAO
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HJSDFG DW IT'S STILL BEING WRITTEN!! :D
I got some of chapter three done Ages Ago and I still intend to finish it at some point—it's just taking a while because I've been focusing on stuff outside of dp/dc for a little bit!! The second chapter came out six months after the first so Technically if I manage to post it before May it's early HJSDGF!!
Glad you liked the first two chapters either way!! It's Awesome that it inspired you to think of your own stuff!! It's super cool that you put your focus on the way the rest of Amity is impacted by everything!! :D
Jack Fenton likes to tell his kids stories about his childhood, sometimes. Likes to talk about his college years, likes to talk about the vastness of the Fenton family, likes to talk about the little cabin in the woods he didn’t leave until he was twenty years old. It’s something of a hobby of his, to reminisce. But like every parent, there’s just a few things that go unsaid. A secret name, a secret origin, some lost fragment of a past lightyears behind him. His children have inherited near nothing of it, he’d thought, and perhaps it was best they never know. And then he discovers his son can fly. (Or: Forty years ago, Jax-An crash landed in Earth’s atmosphere. Five minutes ago, Jack Fenton realised he might have passed more onto his son than he’d first thought.)
Hey guys I posted a dp/dc Kryptonian Jack Fenton fic okay bye have a good day!!!
#My toxic trait is taking 2000000 years to post things I Already have finished so fics I Haven't completed before posting take Forever lmao!!#Do I Technically have enough of the chapter to post it?? Maybe?? But I want it to reach its intended conclusion!!#I Am still around though so!! It's still being thought about and looked at!!! It's not abandoned or anything!!#It's so sweet to see that people are still reading this and interested in it either way!! Really great motivation for writing!!#Shoutout to everyone who's read the first two chapters/commented honestly you've all been So Nice!!! I'm really grateful!!#Also apologies in advance to anyone who sees this reblog and thinks that the third chapter's actually been posted HSJDGF#IT'S HAPPENING EVENTUALLY DON'T WORRY!! ☀️🌟🌻#Anyway hope everyone's having a good day!! Bye for now!! :D
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