#I am literally overwhelmed with the need to watch this anime but I need to pace myself and I'm kinda watching it on my own rn

[dragon-seahorse]

I'M GONNA GO INSANE AND EXPLODE I LOVE THESE TWO IDIOTS SO MUCH!!!!

[flem17ng]

It’s a date.

UCLA! jessie fleming x reader

summary: reader starts her first semester at UCLA and meets bruins midfielder, jessie fleming.

content: fluff, short one-shot. author has no knowledge of the American education system.

The first day of university was always going to be hard. New people, new campus, new lecturers and new classes all together. Maybe it was the fact you’d never been this far from home before that made it worse. 

UCLA was your dream school. Quite literally. You remeber looking at the university website back when you where in middle school and imagining yourself there: kicking a ball in the oval, studying in a library, laps in the big pools. the feeling of actually being here was… overwhelming. 

Like all eighteen year olds do, you had launched yourself into this thing head first: packed bags, kissed your dog goodbye and hopped on the plane. And like most eighteen year olds , you where now struck with the intensity of your actions. 

Here you where, miles from home, no connections in the state, standing outside the lecture theatre for your first class. So yes, overwhelming would be the word of choice. 

You looked down at your timetable for what seemed to be the hundredth time in the last minute, checking and triple checking that you had got the room right. 

“Environmental Studies: Spheres 101”. The name of the course seemed to taunt you at you stared at it blankly. 

Leave it to you to go to one of the most prestigious sports schools in the world, (doing very minimal sport yourself) and end up doing a course all about what? Water, earth, wind and fire?

You knew it was more important than that of course. You picked environmental engineering for a reason: because you cared about that sort of stuff! 

You took a long breath readying to walk in when-

“Oh shit I am so sorry! God I was not looking where I was going!” The thump in your shoulder didn’t knock you quite as off balance as the thick Canadian accent. You froze for a moment, not knowing whether to be pissed at this stranger’s clumsiness or charmed but the voice that reminded you of home. Your eyes flashed up to meet the source of the voice and decided to be charmed. 

Her eyes where the first thing you noticed: large and brown and…. well charming you suposed. Every other part of the girls face fell neatly into place behind those eyes: perfect, warm and adorned with a lopsided and slightly guilty smile. 

It was then that you realised you hadn’t responded. 

“Oh no don’t worry. I was distracted myself” you rushed out, words melding into a lump as they rushed to get passed your lips. It was worth it as you watched the girls guilt melt away into an easier grin. 

“Another Canadian! I thought I was going to be alone here you know” she laughed “I don’t think I would have survived”. 

You nod eagerly, feeling the other girls  relief. “God same! I’m already off kilter over here”

“Eh. we’ll muddle through” she grinned back giving an animated wink before looking back at the door you where still loitering before. 

“Might need to…” she trailed off at motioned with her chin to the door. 

“Right right yes! I don’t want to be late to learn about the spheres of the environment” you drawled sarcastically. The girl rolled her eyes in agreement. 

“Right!? when I saw that on my timetable I couldn’t believe it! I swear I learned this in 9th grade”. 

“American’s eh?” you tut with a playful smile. God you hoped none of the resident americans would over hear you. 

The girl (you realised you didn’t yet know her name) laughed loudly, her teeth flashing handsomely (Looking at her you realised that “handsome” was a pretty accurate diagnosis: broad shoulders, a freakishly athletic build, sharp jawline. Yes, handsome was the word). Together you walked forward into the lecture hall, thankfully not late before parting ways: her going to sit next to a few other athletic looking girls with tight ponytails, and you going to sit near the front (curse your poor eyesight). 

~

To be brutally honest, after that little interaction, you almost completely forgot about the handsome canadian girl with charming eyes from your environmental engineering course. Almost. You saw her about a few times: in the distance on the playing field, walking around campus. But you hadn’t really talked to her since that first class at the beginning of semester. Everytime you got into class she was already there, sitting next to the Bruins girls, pen in hand, with deadly focus. 

You reasoned that it would be impolite to interrupt her, it would be nosy to try join her little group and it would be downright stalkerish to try track her down across campus. 

Not to mention the university work that was flooding in… it was not stopping for anything, that’s for sure, definitely not your strange hang up over a girl you had one interaction with. 

Your reasoning for this preoccupation was simply that you missed home: Canada seemed so far away especially as the weather only got warmer. This girl was simply a reminder that the faraway moose land was real! Additionally, maybe your brain got confused: a kind interaction plus the familiar Canadian accent equals weird unreasonable attachment. 

You shook your head and tried to refocus your eyes in the screen in front of you. You had been staring at the blank document you so long that your head had started to ache and the hot chocolate you bought before you sat down was now definitely cold. The cafe was one of those tiny ones with maybe three indoor tables and a booming espresso machine that took up most of the counter space by the cash register and drowned out the soft music echoing from the speakers. 

You had found it during the second week of semester and now frequented it most afternoons to try and crank out as many assignments as possible. Routine was important, you must understand that. 

You squeezed your eyes shut and rubbed your temple before being rudely startled by a tap of the shoulder. 

“Jeezus! give a girl some warning please!” you snapped before looking up at the offender. Brown eyes stared back at you filled with an amused glint. 

“We gotta stop meeting like this” she laughed. The same laugh that showed off her handsome features and warm glow. 

“Oh hey! It’s um… you!” it wasn’t meant to sound like a stutter but it came out that way anyways. 

“Jessie” she smiled softly, catching your fumble “Jessie Fleming? We have some lectures together?” 

“Yes no! I remember sorry. I just didn’t catch your name” you rambled, feeling suddenly very foolish. She patted your shoulder to pull you out of the spiral. 

“I know. I’m just messing” she sat down in the seat opposite you with a sigh. 

It was then that you really looked at her. She looked very much the same as she had the first time apart from a few key things: her hair was shorter (sitting just above her shoulders whereas before it had hung in a long plat down her back) and her left eye seemed strangely swollen and purple. 

“Um… get into a fight Fleming?” you asked, indicating to her, now obvious, black eye. To your surprise she laughed!

“Oh this old thing! No just a bad tackle during soccer practice” she grinned, poking the swollen lid with a dramatic wince. 

“Soccer… OH! Oh it makes sense now” you lean back in your chair and look at her like you had only just noticed her properly. 

“Fleming! 21! bruins midfielder! God I never made the connection!” you laughed, feeling stupid. Maybe if you had payed more attention to the sport at your SPORT university, you would have found out her name sooner. 

“Oh hush. It’s really nothing” she muttered looking embarrassed. 

“No, shut up Fleming. No it isn’t! I heard a girl in the library talking about your goal in a match a few weeks ago! Boy I know jack shit about sport but I know it was impressive” you hissed back eagerly. 

“No really-“

“Take the damn compliment Jessie”

“Fine! Thank you” she smiled awkwardly with a role of her eyes “It was a pretty good goal I guess”

You smiled and watched her for a long moment as she settled into the seat fully. Your eyes followed her perfect nose, flickered up to her eyebrows before coming to rest at her lips. How could someone look that good so effortlessly?

“Staring is rude” she stated bluntly, as her lips curled into a smirk. You looked away with a jerk, cheeks flaming. 

“I- I was not!”

“Okay…”

“I wasn’t staring! You soccer types, always so big headed!” you mumble, crossing your arms across your chest. You felt childish: of course you had been staring! God how silly that this girl, Jessie, thought you could hold back from staring at her! You’re only human after all. 

“I-“ Jessie started to speak but cut herself off, her mouth hanging open slightly. 

“Yes?”

“I might be out of play for a few weeks. Concussion protocols and all that but… well stop me if this is too forward but, I’d love for you to come to a game? One of my games I mean” her question ended in a rush before she leaned back from the table with big curious eyes. You stared back, dumbfounded. It took a shake of your head to get you to respond. 

“You want me to come to a bruins game?”

“Uhh. Yes?”

“You know I don’t know anything about soccer?”

“I did assume that, yes.”

“But you want me there?”

“Yes.” her tone was soft but firm, determined. “I want you to come to a game please. To watch me play? Or we can watch it together if I’m still out for injury?”

You laugh and clap a hand over your mouth. 

“Are you asking me on a date Jessie Fleming?” you spit out, feeling suddenly emboldened by the other girls flustered expression. Jessie’s cheeks only became redder at your sudden inquiry. 

“Yes please?” came her hopeful squeak. 

You grinned and leaned over the table, placing a soft kiss on her cheek, just under her bruised eye, before sitting back in one swift movement. 

“Ok. But you’re going to have to let me wear your jersey 21. Oh, and explain the offside rule.”

Jessie groaned, but her pink cheeks gave her away. 

“Fine. It’s a date.” 

[unmaskingdisability]

So you want to die (but shouldn't do that)

A list of ways I force myself to keep going even when my entire body is on fire & my brain feels like it's going through a cheese grater

MAKE A PLAN WITH SOMEONE YOU ACTUALLY LIKE - Not a friend you have to gear yourself up to hang out with. A good friend, that will cost low spoons, and plan to do something you enjoy. Nothing extravagant that requires a lot of energy, and it doesn't even have to be in the imminent future. Make a dinner plan for next week and think about that lilac lemonade you've been wanting to make for them. Make a plan to hang out later this month and watch anime with your friend that's good at bullshitting and making you laugh. You won't want to do this when you can't imagine leaving your bed. Do it anyways.

DRAG YOUR EXHAUSTED ASS OUTSIDE - Dress in as many layers as you need or just wrapped in a blanket. Wear sunglasses and headphones if you need. Don't force yourself to do anything, except being outside for at least a few minutes. Sometimes it's cold and wet and all I can handle is walking out for a minute. Sometimes it's warmer and pleasant and now I'm exhausted slumped in the sun or under a pine tree instead of in a dark dirty (mine is anyways bc of the wanting to die and pain) room

VENT - Look I'm the master hypocrite. I run a disability group and I still haven't told pretty much anyone in my life I had to quit my job after my body broke down too far too fast. I advocate emotional vulnerability all day and will legitimately enact it constantly, about everything except how fucking miserable and hopeless and depressed and in pain and scared I am. You don't want to tell anyone because you're convinced they already hate you or are about to leave. I'm not gonna say you need to get over that tonight. But you gotta get it out of your head and your muscles and your body. You've gotta write or draw or splash paint (I will literally fingerpaint just colors sometimes) or hack up invasive plants or make poetry or cry to the person you do feel comfortable talking to. You've gotta get it out You've gotta get it out and also! If being honest about your life and difficulties does push people away fuck them!! Community is everything and that's something they never were, so it's space for something real

GO SOMEWHERE NEW AND BEAUTIFUL - This is one of the hardest things to do when depressed, but if helps so much when you can get yourself somewhere new & exciting and show your brain good things are still happening. For me, this looks like going to a new park, or science/art museum, or to see some pretty lights strung up for the holidays. Nowhere so crowded or busy it'll be too overwhelming, you just need to show your brain everything isn't awful static and get some dopamine pumping.

I'll keep adding to this because I'm full of too much spite and exhaustion and reluctant extreme caring so much to leave you all alone in this shithole

[babyspacekwid]

Some of my Astro placements and how they manifest

Chiron 4th house:

This placement talks of a wound surrounding the family and home, and well, I would often search for a home because no where to me felt like home. I still feel misunderstood and out of place, BUT, I have made deep and valuable connections that have helped guide me and make me feel the love I should have had. Not to say this placement is completely hopless, it’s beautiful and it’s real and it’s tough, but you come out stronger. I use to hate that fucking perspective too. Like okay??? Who gaf if I come out stronger I’m fucking suffering, like why didn’t I get the parents everyone else has? Why’d I have to walk on eggshells? I felt like my anger and sadness was invalidated because I didn’t feel strong. I felt worthless and disorganized. I was a mess and I still am. Idk if that’s ever gonna change tbh, but despite all, it’s true. You DO come out stronger. In every aspect I have. Home is your people it was never a place, home is your mother cradling you for the first time in a while, it’s your friends taking care of you when you’re sobbing. Home is your dad realizing his mistakes and apologizing. Home is a feeling, it’s refreshing and comforting. Home was never suppose to be stressful, or feel like a war zone. To whoever has this same placement I feel you and I love you.

Mars in Aquarius in the 5th house

I do things unconventionally and I only realize this when I’m with other ppl. It can be as simple as the way I eat my burger, to my taste in music. Which is everything. I like literally everything. I don’t care the genre. If it’s good and catchy I love it. I did a lot of different hobbies as a kid too? Like taekwondo, dance, soccer, painting, singing, writing. But I never stayed long in any of those hobbies. Loved anime which ik everyone likes these days but where I live and during my childhood it was still a bit taboo or considered weird to watch. I was the kid that got along with everyone at school too. I didn’t see the point in highschool having a social hierarchy of popularity. It’s fucking stupid. I remember this one kid in my class who everyone thought was weird, which from their perspective I understand because he liked to talk about taboo topics that everyone thought was outrageous, but I was enjoying conversing with him because his perspectives were fresh and built my own views and opinions. I also have a 5th house stellium and I just fucking hate anything that isn’t fun like. I can’t do the 9-5 I have to enjoy my life like this society was not meant for the way my brain works istg.

Lilith 8th house

Constant comments were made about my body when I was young. From good to bad to what the actual fuck are you saying to a 12 year old. No cause it still happens and I’ve learnt to deal with it, but it has greatly affected how I view myself, my sexuality, and my comfortability with it.

Sun and moon in Gemini

I got the worst of both worlds wtf is this?! Considering my chart is 60% air signs you’d think I’d be use to it but I’m notttttt. I try to stray away from the stereotypical “Geminis intellectualize their emotions” but it’s true we do, but I think it’s cause feeling our emotions are overwhelming. Geminis ARE emotional. There’s just so much going on that my brain decides “I need a solution to this now cause feeling is pain” also hate that I’m not consistent. Consistency is my worst enemy, it doesn’t agree with me and my behaviours and we have an ongoing tense relationship, so I don’t finish anything. Not the books I wanna write or the paintings I wanna finish. Working on it tho 😭

Jupiter in Leo in the 11th house

I know so many people, and the friends I’ve made feel like my soul family. We’re siblings at this point. (Also rlly love the spotlight. What can I say I’m an attention whore)

[karliahs]

i finished season 6!! i have...many thoughts. arguably too many. and please be aware that unlike my last screaming session, there's a fair bit of discussion here that isn't wholly positive! if negativity/criticism of this show is going to bum you out (genuinely no judgement if so), please don't click this readmore!

organised into a numbered list to pretend i'm capable of coherency. okay.

i am extremely biased and you shouldn't listen to me probably

there is a sense in which this show cannot win with me once it starts changing the status quo beyond approx the cultural festival, because i'm in the weird position of having spent literal years living mentally in this space that's like vaguely post-kamino to just post-overhaul. that's my comfy cozy little status quo zone and i like it there a lot. so when this show necessarily, very legimately wants to move its plot and characters forward from that point, there is always a part of me that feels a little like someone just ripped a big wall off my favourite playhouse - it's a legitimate story development but also hey :/

that said! when i was looking ahead at the stuff i knew happened from the point after i stopped watching, i kind of thought "huh, it sure does seem to escalate pretty intensely and become Just All War after a certain point." and i kind of thought that perception might be a function of my knowledge being all from spoilers, bc naturally that will focus on big plot developments and leave out quieter in-between moments. but uh... nope! again i cannot be trusted with perceptions about pace but...my feeling when watching is very much that at a certain point horikoshi decided he was barreling this thing right to the finish line

and that's fair! a lot of what's going on here with this status quo shake-up is like the objectively competent storytelling move where you don't give the audience time to slow down so they're feeling the same sense of overwhelm and fear that the characters are. basically it's me not them but boy would i have liked...space. for characters to slow down and react and feel things.

2. midnight was fucking robbed

she was robbed!!! why even kill her if you aren't gonna give it...weight. i know she's a minor character but best jeanist is a minor character and i feel like his fakeout death was borderline given more screentime and gravity than midnight's real actual death. and i know this show isn't about aizawa but fuck!! she had a big big place in the young aizawa arc, she mattered! to mic and aizawa! they were friends for 15 years! and they just don't really...do anything with it. i feel like if they'd killed mic off there'd have been...something. something that wasn't here. and she's not that much more minor a character than mic

3. the dabi reveal ruled

we all knew but christ. dance with your son in hell! the wilder and more bloodthirsty he gets the more i'm here for it. go for it you funky little maniac. love that he was animated like a weird little marionette while talking about shouto being a puppet. it's genuinely impressive that even with 0% surprise factor this still hit so good. i'm rotating him in my head like a microwave

and i say often that this show is better at creating problems than solving them for me but it sure is good at creating problems like. that fucking house. the pressure cooker of misery. tiny little touya soaking it all in. harrowing

4. the thing where dabi is a foil for shouto does not hit for me

i know i just said a bunch of good things about the dabi stuff but. okay.

i was conceptually never here for the concept of endeavour redemption arc and i will say! i was at times pleasantly surprised. the ep that basically concludes that the best thing he can do for his family is to stay the fuck away from them had more maturity than i expected. and again i genuinely enjoy the drama! it's very good drama!

but there is just. something about the thing where dabi is specifically there to be like. this is what shouto needs to try not to turn into with his anger towards his father, this is the path that could lead him down that just... for me it rings too much like vilifying the anger of an abused child. after they went so hard and so explicit on the domestic abuse angle.

i'm not saying you can't tell good interesting and valuable stories about anger after abuse, and even about how it's easy to become consumed by hatred when you've been wronged and let that take away your future. probably this story is that for some people. it isn't for me.

5. i love mirio but the missed potential of his temporary quirklessness fucking haunts me

idk if i can even say more about this like. i love him. i was happy to see him again. i long ago accepted that this show will never dig into quirklessness in a way that would satisfy me (and yes i know about Future Events and will be pleasantly surprised if that proves me wrong). but i truly cannot get over the missed potential of doing nothingggggg with this character who explicitly had a power that only let him be an incredible hero because of WORK. and effort. and training. and then having him lose the power but not the work and effort and training, and then shoving him gently out of the narrative until he just gets the power back one day. when your protagonist grew up quirkless!!! the opportunity for reflection on that is so obvious!!

okay apparently i could say more about that. sorry. read pez dispenser debris

6. hawks man

i already yelled (positively) about the twice stuff last time but it's worth yelling again because fuck!! again it's wild to me that after actively encouraging and seeking out spoilers, i still managed not to know this. and it fucking hit. toga's line where she goes "if [heroes'] purpose is to save people, did they not think jin was a person?" hit so fucking hard i had to pause the episode and put my hand over my mouth and stare at the ceiling for a while. it's...genuinely damning

and i think they did a really incredible job building hawks' character to the point where he does this. like. it's one of those perfect tragedy things where you can see all the pieces spinning into place. make someone into a weapon and they're gonna draw blood.

and then as always. i just vibe way more with the creation of those problems than their solutions. i'm sure they will do at least a little more with hawks but. idk. i feel like horikoshi is so good at breaking stuff and then he kind of hastily glues it back together and i'm like wait please. the wreckage was so fascinating. fixing it would be so long and hard and also fascinating. this is what fanfiction is for probably

7. lady nagant!!

i knew nothing about her going in and i liked her a lot. the music worked so well, there's this one specific kind of circussy little riff that i liked almost as much as AFO's theme, my other fave piece of music from this show

and again it's like...genuinely damning! holy fuck! and i'm trying to just enjoy the parts where they launch extremely cutting criticisms of hero society without remembering that my vague amalgamation of spoiler knowledge suggests we will not be....doing a whole lot with that

8. iconic yellow scarf era of sadness! at last!

in some ways i am the ideal audience for this narrative and in other ways i am again hopelessly biased. bc i have been craving content that addresses the fact that my boy is like this for so long, but also it's so My Favourite Subject that i have seen done well so many times that i'm like...would anything ever really be enough for me, an addressing midoriya's self destruction guy for literally 5 years now

in my head i expected this arc to be izuku going fully rogue so i was surprised when this was like...a semi-sanctioned thing, at least at first. but makes sense so you can then build to him being basically totally rogue. and oof the build. i really liked the visuals! let my son be fucked up and scary and haunted

and god when he admits he can't go back because he is so scared. i feel like the mall scene hit way harder for me this rewatch because there are so many horrible aspects to it, but particularly the thing of looking at these people all around you and knowing if you cry out too loud they will all get hurt. and it will be your fault, if you can't bear it quietly enough. and you are fifteen fucking years old. so the moment at jaku when izuku looks around at all the evacuating civilians and you can see him realising that him being anywhere near them could doom them. because they're near you, and this person with impossibly destructive power wants You. you're next...that inversion. that pressure. i love him forever and ever...

9. i knew aizawa would not be in this arc but i felt his absence so keenly

like i know i know. he's a minor character. he was busy not having a leg anymore. but i would have killed a man for anyyyy kind of OFA reveal reaction/one of his kids running around the city with a target on his back from the world-ending villains reaction. please. please. i knew i wouldn't get it but i still wanted it very bad

[nostalgiclittlespace]

LITTLE SPACE IS VALID AND SFW

CW: Mentions of anti-agere, age play, and fetishes

So, I was just checking my notifs and saw some harassment on one of my posts. Someone saying that Little Space is inherently sexual, that regressors were stealing terms, etc.

And I am here to remind you of why that is WRONG.

Age regression is a stress response. It can be caused by a traumatic event, being a part of a DID system, or even day to day stressors that overwhelm us. We literally enter the mindset of children, and this is medically recognized. Various conditions such as PANS, DID, PTSD, depression, BPD, dissociative disorders, catatonia, and even stress disorders all recognize behavioral regression. It’s LITERALLY medically recognized.

Besides, you don’t even need a reason; if it’s fun and relaxing for you, then go for it! It’s proven to be an effective coping mechanism.

You can be online and post about your little space. How is it any different from any other community sharing their interests? We are making virtual safe spaces and encouraging each other online. Nothing wrong with that.

Little Space is inherently NOT SEXUAL. In what way is watching kids shows, having stuffed animals, and using a sippy sexual??? Crying because you’ve had a long day, getting to go to the park, playing toys????

HONESTLY LOWKEY WORRIED ABOUT THOSE AGEPLAYERS BC GEEZ WHAT—???

don’t let anyone tell you that your regression is sexual. Clearly, they are incorrect. If you have an age play kink, then fine. I’m not discussing it here. But don’t you dare come after my community and tell us to start conforming to your fetishes. No, I will not be taking criticism on this. You are VALID for being a SFW AGE REGRESSOR. DONT LET ANYONE TELL YOU OTHERWISE. ONLY YOU GET TO DEFINE THE PARAMETERS AND BOUNDARIES OF YOUR REGRESSION

[bratbby333]

. . . ⇢ ˗ˏˋ [ blog update ! ] ࿐ྂ

+ some housekeeping and info on new writing

hello my loves !! i wanted to give y'all some insight on what's been going on in my mind palace lately. there's a lot...so...cmon, take a walk w me...and maybe bring some snacks.

ੈ♡˳ first and foremost ! my work has received a lot more attention recently and i am so excited. with actual tears in my eyes, im happy to report that i surpassed 1,000 followers the other day. i am at a loss for words...just...stuck in a perma-state of disbelief.

im sending out the biggest thank you to everyone who has supported me, who's interacted with my work, to the lovely friends ive made though this account and to the heartbreakingly beautiful anime that brought me here in the first place. i am genuinely in awe...overwhelmed, even...i didn't expect any of this to happen when i started this blog and i am forever indebted to all of you for getting me here. im actively fighting off the inevitable surge of imposter syndrome as i type this out...i just love y'all so fucking much. this community means the world to me and i wanna scream at the top of my lungs in order to demonstrate my deepest appreciation for each and every one of y'all.

ੈ♡˳ secondly ! a message for my little angel babies, my day one followers; thank you for taking a chance on me. for watching me grow. for sticking around as i worked to get better at writing. im sure a lot of you started following me for my gamer!bf sukuna series...trust me, i love him and i know y'all do too. but i feel like my writing is heading in a different direction...and with a heavy heart, i'm absolutely gutted when i say that i am taking a pause on that series. i am forever grateful for the support and may return to him soon, though i cannot promise that. i owe so much of what my account is now to that series and i will never forget that.

for everyone who joined me as i delved into dark/dead dove content, thank you from the bottom of my heart for allowing me a safe space to explore different forms of story-telling. my choso fic was the first stepping stone and then i skipped every other stone on the path and jumped head first into the deep end with my dead dove gojo fic...i deeply appreciate all the positive feedback i received on both of those. after posting them, i realized that i am very into writing dark content. i know that taboo themes/dark content/dead dove subject matter isn't for everyone and i understand people's apprehension in regards to it. but with that being said, i will be moving forward with publishing darker content.

ੈ♡˳ so here's the writing update !

i did a poll asking y'all what kind of content you enjoy. a good chunk of people said long form fics (which is great, cause i do too !! mommy needs plot). so, i am migrating away from one shot writing. both because i've been thinking about it for awhile and because y'all are into longer stories, as well. but fear not, i will still write shorter stuff along with headcannons, drabbles, etc...it just won't be the main focus of my blog anymore.

ੈ♡˳ now, time for the big reveal ! perhaps it's a bit anticlimactic, but bear with me...

im so excited to announce that i have two new series coming ! it will be a dark, modern!au featuring choso (with a few other special guests) and a dead dove sukuna series.

i'm almost finished with the outlines, and have fully completed the theme layout + mood boards for both works. i hope to get the first few chapters wrapped up in the next couple weeks. if you want to be tagged in either of these (or both), just leave a comment or send me a message !

(also !! i may or may not be cooking up a dark medieval au series in collaboration with another writer on here...so be on the lookout for that hehe)

while i take breaks from writing my two series, i'll be working through my requests ! so if you've sent one in, i promise i will get to it, unless i literally cannot think of a good way to write it (im only human, im so sorry). also, im sure we already knew this, but im a slowww writer. i wish i could churn content out quick as fuck but i am too hypercritical of myself…it's both a blessing and a curse, honestly.

if you made it all the way to the end of this nightmare of a brain dump, i love you. if you've been with me for a while, i love you. if you're just now joining me, i love you. everyone who’s supported me in any way, shape, or form, i love you.

i present you with the sloppiest kiss with tongue (only if you want it, of course. i can also give you the tightest hug, the gentlest head pat, or my social security number...access to all my bank accounts? a mansion in the hills? my passport? hand in marriage? my first born child? literally whatever you want, babe).

okay !! i think that's all for the updates. feeling: very ambitious and motivated but also overwhelmed and mildly stressed but overall super excited for what's to come. im looking forward to this new adventure and i hope y'all come along with me ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

thank you again…for literally everything. yall hold a special place in my heart and always will. so, here we go !

see you on the other side, my loves.

— jade 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪

[italeean]

HI ELLE! CONGRATS ON THE FOLLOWER MILESTONE 💖💖💖

And this event sounds so fun so I had to send in something (no pressure ofc ^-^)

Description: I literally had to go around asking my friends to describe me bc I couldn’t think of much besides that I’m an introvert and pessimistic about myself lmao. So from the intel I’ve gathered: I’m shy, friendly, kind, care a lot about those closest to me, and worry too much about things. My interests are pretty boring, all I do is play videogames (mainly rhythm games nowadays) and watch anime occassionally, although I can get very passionate about them. I don’t have much of a preference to the people I surround myself with, as long as they can handle my more reserved nature and respect my boundaries.

I am a lee leaning switch :3

And I’d like to choose genshin impact as the fandom. I started playing not too long ago and it’s been my new hyperfixation.

With a romantic relationship with a male character!

Oh and my name is Sakura!🌸

I hope I did this correctly kahdjahdjahsh

Have a good day/night‼ And take your time!

Sakuraaa 🥹💕 After months of inactivity, I'm taking back the reins of this event and I'm more than ready to match you up with your special someone hehe ✨️ Thanks for your patience, e spero ti piaccia il mio lavoro 💚🤍❤️ (and I hope you'll enjoy my work) 🍡 *hands you the dango to eat while you read*

🔮 Without further ado, your match is... KAZUHA

🔮 Why did I choose him for you?

1. You say you're pessimistic about yourself, and this little ray of sunshine is the perfect way to bring some light in 2. He's delicate and soft-spoken, which won't make you feel overwhelmed by endless talking 3. He's super perceptive, which means he'll understand how you're feeling without you having to tell him, which can be hard sometimes when you're an introvert 4. If you play rhythm games, he might play a tune with leaves to match the rhythm you're playing in the game! That would be so cute... 5. Even he's usually a ray of sunshine, he can have his bad days, especially when he thinks about Tomo, and you'd be able to support him quietly thanks to your personality and your emotional baggage 6. Kazuha is a generally quiet person, so expect many, MANY successful sneak attacks... and if your sides or ribs are sensitive, you'll be in for a bumpy ride 7. He's the personification of gentleness, so he'd be sure to inquire about your boundaries without you even needing to tell him anything 8. He likes the sound of your laughter even more of the song of the wind between the leaves, so tickling you is one of his favorite ways to "bring some light into your pessimism" 9. I feel like he'd LOVE to blow some air into your ears or pepper kisses on your neck if those spots are sensitive 10. He also does mind a few pokes if he needs to be cheered up... and if you do that to get his attention, he'll get the hint and proceed to tickle you as much as you'd like!

🔮 Tickle scenario

Kazuha couldn't ask for a better morning than this. Azure sky with some fluffy white clouds, the music of nature made by the wind that caresses the leaves, lying on the grass in silence with his eyes closed...

... and you.

You and him had started dating a few months ago. He was the best thing that had ever happened in your life, and he thought the same about you. You two didn't need loud love, your relationship could be compared to a warm, soft cocoon. You expressed your feelings through little gestures and by being there for each other.

Unless you were bored.

Don't get me wrong, Kazuha loved every aspect of you, but when you were bored, you were quite the handful. Little pranks, pokes, silly jokes... you would try everything to distract him, and that's what you wanted in that exact moment.

Calling him was an amazing option, since he was a samurai with an astounding control of all his senses, but where was the fun in that? You surely could do much better, so you got up, making as little noise as possible, and approached him with your hands shaped in claws ready to attack.

His eyes were still closed, perfect. You just needed to attack. 3... 2... 1... Now!

Or so you thought...

As soon as your fingertips came in contact with his ribcage, you felt something gripping your wrists and in a fraction of second, you were on the grass, facing the blue sky and a white-haired guy with an ominous smirk that you had learned to fear.

"Were you trying to wake me up, love?" He asked in a sweet tone mixed with a hint of playfulness, "Alas, your reflexes seem a little sluggish, like a lethargic bear cub." He tsked with no annoyance in his voice, just a little mocking.

"Maybe you're the one who needs a little awakening, aren't you, little cub?"

Before you could make up even the faintest argument to object, his hands started zapping your sides with ruthlessly, relentlessly and with the meticulous precision provided by the knowledge of every single spot that made you squeak, squeal or even snort.

"Ka- wahahahait nooo..!" You begged, but your pleas fell on deaf ears, as the tickle assault only increased in intensity. You attempted to swat his hands away, but that was futile as well. His reflexes were much faster than yours.

"Not good, your reflexes don't show any sign of awakening yet. Such a lazy little cub..." He joked, enjoying the blush that invaded your cheeks because of the nickname, "Do we really need to take extreme measures to make the lazy cub arise?"

Your eyes widened in shock and glee, and your laughter became much more nervous. "No no nohoho w-we dohohon't... we don't need to..! Please we do-" Not even Kazuha's refined lexicon had a term to define the high pitch of your scream, and the samurai knew this was his stop signal.

He raised his hands and helped you sit up while you were gasping for air, using his Anemo vision to create a gentle, refreshing breeze for you.

When you recovered, you looked at him with a gaze that meant war and pronounced the words: "I swear to the Seven Archons, I'll get you back."

Your warmongering glare was met with a smug, playful one. "Come at me then, cub, and show me your awakened reflexes" He chuckled, getting ready for a day full of combat.

[transgenderdoctorwhomst-old]

I'd like to hear more of your broody 11 ideas pls

Love when people make the doctors act not human <3

when he's not travelling with the ponds i think he copes by fostering large (human infant sizedish) baby animals so he can Hold them and Take Care of them until it breaks naturally. he does not want to subject himself to the Ice Bath Stop Being Broody time. he also does not want to have/adopt an actual baby right now. therefore, project his overwhelming Wanting To Take Care Of Thing feelings on to animals or his friends.

i think gallifrey would've made medications to help people snap out of it. he does not have access to gallifrey. renegade time lords have a Great time coping.

the doctor, amy, and rory swiftly develop plan "amy distracts the doctor while rory prepares an ice bath, and then rory wrestles the doctor into it." amy distracts him by letting him hold her Firmly while watching TV. sometimes she can escape by shoving a soccer ball at him to hold while she gets food or whatever. the doctor always tries to fight them even though he literally told them how to break him out of it if he's being "too much of a nuisance" or just generally they need him in his right mind for one reason or another.

it takes way too long for him to explain this behaviour to them. i am actually inclined to think river will explain it to them. not because she experiences it too, that's up for debate, but because she's had more than a few instances of him popping by her cell for a broody snuggle. and by the third day of the doctor clinging on to them like a koala they are Desperate for an answer.

[fairycosmos]

Oh boy, things are extremely rough atm. Can you recommend any healthy coping mechanisms? I literally don’t know a single one that works for me except for self destruction and being on my phone until I don’t feel anything anymore. And apparently that’s not what we’re supposed to do when we’re sad

ok so unfortunately all of my healthy coping mechanisms only half work for me and it's a total gamble whether or not they're going to on any given day. and none of them ever cure my mental illness which is annoying. like they're not fail-proof solutions and a lot of the time they're simply frustrating in fact it often feels laughable to even try them. a walk is not going to make any of this better. but consistency DOES strengthen your coping skills like a weak muscle. like even after 3 days of practicing them i'm like Ok well i feel like shit but i survived without hurting myself and that was the whole point. not a cure but a tool. ok i'm just going to list them because otherwise, i will ramble forever. btw it's ok to do like, even half of one of these per day. there's no need to overwhelm yourself at all :) coping is coping.

meditation - it sounds and feels like bullshit but i follow this youtube called great meditation and they upload 10 min guided meditation sessions and they have truly gotten me through a lot of low moments at this point. sometimes i feel much better after and sometimes i barely notice a difference but the point is i've sat and breathed for a bit

journaling - i thought i needed some sort of mental health diary for this but then i just opened a google doc and followed these mental health journal prompts ( just one every other day, nothing overwhelming, and no pressure to write a lot or to write anything in particular) and it helped me organise my thoughts and notice the patterns i was/am locking myself into. there's also trauma processing prompts online if that is what you're after.

free writing - again just opening a word doc but this time you just write without thinking literally letting go and putting down whatever words your fingers type - no judgement no curation no performance no expectations.

submerging my face in cold water, holding ice cubs - good for grounding.

crying my eyes out, purposefully listening to sad songs or watching sad movies in order to do so - cleansing, painful, tires you out and can make you feel renewed briefly.

breathwork - again there's some great youtube vids for this. i do this 20 min nervous system reset somewhat often, but there's shorter ones that are also very effective. box breathing also helps if you just need a simple go to - breathe in for 4, hold for 4, our for 4.

lie down on a hard surface or the floor with your back straight - another grounding thing. to occupy your mind during this you can name 5 things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one you can taste.

pat your arms, legs, stomach, head, chest gently and breathe deeply - again it can be grounding.

watch trail cam vids of cute animals, use the wikipedia page generator to read up on smth you've never really thought about before, download duolingo and start learning a language. not to become fluent just to get your mind out of the place it's in, even for 5 minutes.

literally just move around especially outside - HATEEE to say it but stretching on your bedroom floor, going for a walk, following an exercise video etc - it can really help you feel a bit less stale and myopic. if it's too much, opening a window is a good start. or simply standing outside your house for 2 minutes and going back in. the air will feel good.

make sure all your bases are covered - have you eaten, have you slept, have you showered, have you talked to someone in the last few days, are you hydrated? if not, make a small move towards doing one of those things. feeling like crap physically only compounds how crap you feel mentally and so the cycle perpetuates.

scream, punch/throw pillows, snap pencils, stab at paper with pens.

affirmations - i'm trying to build a list of ones that resonate with me specifically because a lot of them don't LOL. but there's a lot of good resources online for this. one of my favorite current ones is: doing a little is better than doing nothing. a job half done is better than a job not done at all.

do something creative - it's not about being an artistic genius it's about doing something tangible with your hands and getting out of your head and using the space in your brain to focus on something that doesn't feel doomed. drawing, singing, cooking, playing an instrument, writing, whatever you want. you don't have to have done it before. you can just do it.

talk to someone you trust/care about, let them in even a tiny bit. it's ok to verbalise these things. give them a fair chance to be there for you the way you'd want to be there for them. i know it's hard, all of this is, but it's not impossible. also, look for any communal resources you can find - support groups, local therapists who may offer sliding scale prices that are affordable. it all sucks but it's something.

will add more when/if any come to mind. i'm sorry you're feeling like this and i sincerely hope it all becomes a bit lighter for you soon. sending so much love. x

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

WHATISUPEVERYBODY you know it wasn’t my intention to watch literally one episode every two weeks but here we are i guess ITS TIME FOR ANOTHER KNOX REACTS TODAY ITS MONKIE KID SEASON 5 EPISODE 4 LESGET IIIIIT

The ssssstorm within, alright, alright, something to do with Mk and blowing up maybe? who knows, perhaps we shall find out MWAHAHA! Well, i mean obviously we’ll find out we’re watching the episode—listen i just woke up i can’t be held responsible for my incoherent ramblings LETS MOVE ON

Face in hands bro i miss flying Bark. BRUTAL DUDE (gotta say it at least once every episode sorry bois :pensive_emoji:)

Sniffs, just plow straight through the underbrush its fine—

Monkey King and Mei face down… okay…. this is…. a very fun frame i will admit…. who wants matching icons—/j/jj/

PREGUFFINGLKJA;DSF WE’RE REALLY RIDING THOSE MCGUFFIN JOKESLKGMSDF

sniffs

scratches head. okay so we’re just using sandy yelling as a gag now… cool cool cool okay sure sure, not like Sandy never raising his voice made the emotional beat of him yelling when contention happened devastating and startling. I guess the whole overwhelming Mk with WE GOT THIS!! talk would be an inevitable one, it always worked before. I mean, except for during the season 2 special. And… any other time hype up hasn���t really… worked… Listen I’m just overanalyzing probably but some of the choices in this season with the characters just feels off to me. Ngl with every episode I watch, the less it feels like monkie kid to me. The last one wasn’t so bad, and hey, we’re only a minute 25 into this one so that might change but that’s my gut reaction right now. Makes me a bit sad! I’ve been watching Dragons Rising (ninjago) with my buddy and been having the time of my life, the animation is gorgeous and it feels like the new peeps really understand the characters and its honestly so much fun, and then I’m kinda sitting here with monkie kid and puzzle pieces that don’t really fit and I’m not sure what to do with it! I know like, it’s the same writers but it just does not feel like it to me. Could be how rushed they always are, they’re doing their best, like—oNCE AGAIN TO BE CLEAR, when I criticize anything or say it feels off, this is NOT me saying bad writers bad people bad bad bad, I’m just saying how it feels to me! It feels almost like they’re trying to bring the comedic lightness of season 1 back but like… it feels kinda plastic and wrong! WORDS FAIL ME, PLS DON’T QOUTE ME I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT LETS MOVE ON

the kneeling down is kinda cute good for them

Sandy hype man!

…..

Is he just trying to get them all out of there so Mk can have some breathing roomGML;SMADF Cause otherwise splitting up is a terrible idea

Special Sandy training!!!

Mk smashing rocks together, okay that was cute h;LGKAJWOEF

Sandy so excited about meditation

sniffs

I FEEL LIKE MK COMPLAINS A LOT MORE THAN USUAL. Why is he so whiny?? Was he this whiny before? Am i losing my mind???? I’ve never wanted Mk to talk less before what is going on

Mystic Monkey meditatiNGN;LAKSDF WHY IS HIS FAKE BEARD ORANGELKMGSDF oh he’s impersonating sandy. SANDY AND WUKONG HAVE SIMILAR COLOURED HAIR I THOUGHT HE WAS USING MONKEY KINGS HAIR COLOUR DON’T LOOK AT ME HGLKAJSDF

The crackity cracks are backity back

“I see you” WELL THATS METAL DOPE

I WILLL ADMIT, THIS IS GREAT, BRO REALLY NEEDS THIS BIG ITME

….me fr pretend to meditate so true==

Storm within that’s funny

SANDY’S A GREAT PERSON TO TALK TO ABOUT THIS

LIL SNEK

I GOT SOMEONE TO FIGHT TAT’S NOT JUST MY THOUGHTSLKMGOWIEFMSDF

MK PLS

ooop next—SECRET TUNNELLLL SECRET TUNNEELLLLL THROUGH THE MOUNTAINNNNNNNNNNN

Just got led to it np that’s funny

Mk’s opening secret access swishy gold thing is fun

Bro’s really assaulting a rock

Owaaaa big ol turtle…. with cracks!

HELPGLKAM;WOEF

Classic

Ah yes meditation, who could have seen this coming

gGKASDF BRAVADO KILLED

I know he’s complaining as a deflection but :T man Mk whining so much is getting old really fast. Like its for the gag and you could say its for the deflection but MAN. Every four seconds he’s got his whiny voice on, bro?? I’m hoping they get all the humour they want out of that gag in this episode :(

I SWEAR I’M NOT TRYING TO BE NEGATIVE THIS IS JUST DOING A NUMBER ON ME OUGH

HEY GET OFF MY SANDY OI

RELEASE MY MAN

COME ON TURTLE

Bro literally has to face his trauma to save his friend what the heck turtle that’s so rude—

OKAY WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO WATCH THIS? I’ve tried two separate types of headphones (one stolen from my brother) a friend’s tv and just my computer’s speakers and the audio volume difference in the voices vs the music is STILL jarring. Like???? I have it turned up so much just to HEAR the voices and TRY to understand them and then the music kicks in and its bLARING and AGGRESSIVE and NOT IN A CINEMATIC WAY. dear gods its like they made monkie kid as unfriendly to watch as possible for me what is going on I’M TRYING TO ENJOY MY MONKIE SHOW STOP JARRING ME OUT OF IT [SHAKES LEGO UNTIL THEY FALL TO PIECES] I’M TRYING TO ENJOY MK HAVING TO FACE HIS TRAUMA SOMETHING I’VE HIGH KEY WANTED TO WATCH SINCE SEASON 1 WAILS

Acknowledging the “okay, i want to push that away, but i’m not going to” is really neat i like that

Hello disembodied voice

Okay, i may not be vibin with the audio, the animation, or the jokes in this ep, but my GODS does Ashe know how to write brutal dialogue. The reason Mk being so afraid of his monkey powers is because he likes it?? Oh yeah, I’m down with that i am SO down for that, I have been clawing at that concept for AGES, I am SO DOWN

So who’s going to be trying to control mk this season? Snake guy?? Newbie?? The choosing yourself and making your own path is really heavy handed so far hL;GJKASDF

Sandy’s advice?? GOD TIER. We love that. I love actual good advice in cartoons thank you

Conversations with self!!! OHHH OHH I LIKE THE EXHALE

TAT WAS NICE

OKAY SO THE HWOLE MIND SEQUENCE I’M A HUGE FAN OF

TERES MY BOY

Sandy’s trigger word is Worthy huh he dont’ like thatLKGMA;OWEFWHEEZE

nah we are so glad Mk has Sandy here actually that is so good I’VE BEEN WANTING SANDY MOMENTS FOR SO LONG AND WE GOTTEM THANK YOUUUUUUUUUU like, the rest of what i said still stands but the emotional beats still hit really nicely and I’m very grateful we still have that!

Yeah that car is gonna get smashed by mei or pigsy and tang yeah yup there we go

oH WOW-oh nvm there it goes

well ! Wonder what mei found! That felt like a little bit of a clunky ending bit for some reason i can’t explain but! Big fan of the Sandy and Mk content I love them, totally deserved, been wanting Sandy talk like that for AAAAGES BLESS

Okayokay, always ending on positive note so lets go over one more time: Mk’s talk with himself? BANGER. Once he got talking, I really liked the dialogue and I really liked the vibe of the whole thing, Loved his exhale, loved the admittance of that all being part of him and that he chooses to work on other parts of him that is AWESOME and super cool to see depicted the way it was all cinematic and cool we love that. Love diving into a little bit of the complexities of our man Sandy! Love him opening up a bit to Mk so he can see he’s not alone in his struggles! That Sandy’s got something like that too and he’s still one of the most wonderful kind people Mk knows! The people who Mk has surrounding him are all exactly what he needs and that’s really cool!!! Ough okay welp, maybe I will be thinking about Sandy and Mk’s dyname for the rest of all time RAAAAAAA I REALLY enjoyed how they wrote them there.

Thanks for reading! Sorry I’m still a bit all over the place with my reactions, i feel like I keep repeating the same things but by GOSH the audio is THROWING ME. But yeah that was a nice way of addressing some of Mk’s trauma, even if it was only for like three minutes, its well done and I enjoyed it! very excited to see they can still nail those emotional bits. HOPE Y’ALL HAVE A SPECTACULAR DAY AND GOOD VIBES HUNT YOU DOWN RELENTLESSLY. KNOX OUT

[nerdy-talks]

Obey Me! Nightbringer Lesson 40

I'm gonna start this post by venting a little, so please bear with me ^^"

It's been a rough few months.

The one thing I get the most joy from has also been turning me into a massive emotional wreck.

First, there was the finale of Attack on Titan. No lie or exaggeration, I cried for 3 whole days. And tonight I will be experiencing the same pain all over again since the Dub is scheduled to air.

Then Jujutsu Kaisen... Gojo. Nanami. Need I say more?

To break things up, I thought I would finally sit down and binge watch Fruits Basket. It was the one anime that I was surprisingly able to avoid all spoilers with. And like the fool I am, I thought "aww, this looks like such a cute anime! I bet this series won't be sad."

As I said... I'm a fool lol. But at least I wasn't crying alone. My Mom had watched the entirety of Fruits Basket with me, and she also shed some tears I shared the pain, mwhahaha! >:)

Now, I can add Obey Me! Nightbringer to the list of things that have made me sob like a baby.

This scene specifically :

I was seriously overwhelmed with emotions.

I couldn't stop the tears from welling up in my eyes. I tried my best to choke back my feelings. But I was unable to contain myself, and the ugly sobbing began.

I dunno.... Lucifer showing his genuine gratitude to us is just... so sweet and precious to me.

The part that actually made me cry is him telling us "May the path you walk in life be full of joy and happiness."

Lucifer.... There's literally no way that I could ever be happy without you and your brothers in my life!! T_T

Those 7 boys have been majorly responsible for my joy and happiness since the very beginning, and even though we were supposedly returning to them in the future/present... It still doesn't make saying goodbye to the past boys any easier.

Like... I would have clung onto Lucifer here and cried into his chest while apologizing for crying... But they mean so much to me, I just wouldn't be able to stop myself ; ^ ;

And ohhhhhh boyyyyy! When it came to us calling upon each of the brothers for their power and they each said goodbye to us.... Let's just say I was so happy that I was home alone because I was legit wailing, so much that even my dogs were looking at me like "what the Hell is wrong with you, you weird human?" xD

Then!

Even though I am skeptical, suspicious, and on guard about our "return" to the future/present... I burst into tears again when I read this :

Levi.... please don't cry.... you're making my tears well up again! T^T

And then to make matters even more emotional :

Welcome home! ; _ ;

I'm not sure if I'm just in a phase where I cry easily, or if I'm growing softer as I get older.... But either way, it's clear that my love, devotion, and feelings for fictional characters is more intense than ever before lol

[cucumberteapot]

Across the Spiderverse - End Credits Analysis

Good afternoon, everyone. I am back again to discuss this amazing film we all love and I wanted to talk about the end credits. Typically the end credits signify the end of the film but in this rare case, I feel there is a lot to speculate about the visuals and what they could mean for the future film. Afterall, the next installment will be called '"Beyond" the Spider-verse' after all. Beyond canon. Beyond animation and live-action. Beyond narrative conventions in film and storytelling.

So let us begin... one last time.

We are introduced to the end credits with the beautiful violin of Metro Boomin, Roisee and A$AP Rocky's 'Am I Dreaming', invoking Miles' dilemma of belonging to Spider society, hiding his identity from his family and the inevitable challenges he faces and will later face in the next movie. Personally, I'd like to interpret these visuals as Miles' actually dreaming in conjecture with the song's title, or an artistic representation of Miles' headspace. However you interpret it is up to you.

Regardless, this sequence takes place in a surrealist void and we see Miles' spiderman logo spray painted onto what we think is his suit but in actuality is one of Spot's spots. Miles is an artist and customises his costume accordingly, but when we learn it's on a spot, it conveys how Miles' personal and superhero lives are interconnecting and the dangers that pertains.

Then we see Miles properly and he is clearly overwhelmed by this new reality he has to navigate thus hefalls through one of the spots. This sequences makes the effort of conflating Spot's spots with the dimension travel portals and as we see throughout, they represent the uncontrollability of Miles' situation and the moralities of the characters going through them.

Thankfully, Miles is able to catch himself from falling any further. He slings his webs from what looks like buildings but are instead more spots.

Gradually the spots disintegrate, forcing Miles to keep swinging. As Spot threatens in his dialogue and his vision in Mumbattan, he is disrupting Miles' home dimension and forcing him to see him as more than a "villain of the week". Even if Miles goes home, his home will not be the same after the Spot's interference.

But even though Miles keeps moving, it's not enough and we see Spot's giant hands reaching through his holes to grab Miles and presumably pull him through them. I already talked a little bit about Spiderverse villains and their hands in a previous post so you can read more about that here. But here Spot is dehumanised and characterised by his hands, becoming a force of nature by the end of the film that Miles will need to reckon with.

And Miles does by jumping through the black hole in Spot's equally giant head. No longer is he trying to catch Miles or bat him away, but waits for him to attack. Miles leaps through him but he doesn't harm the Spot. He is still powerless against him on his own and so he keeps running, this time avoiding white spots or spotlights instead of black one, perhaps reflecting the inversion of challenges he will face in the Earth-42 dimension.

But then he is distracted. Miles is stopped in his tracks by another titan - the Earth-42 spider that bit him. On first watch I thought the spider was the Go-Home Machine but I feel the same imagery applies. Miles never choose to be bit. To be Spider-man. And he didn't choose to go to the Earth-42 dimension. All of these things were by the consequences of someone else's decisions or consequences. He quite literally can't fight against these components.

Unable to fight back, the Earth-42 spider bites down on Miles like when he was bit and sends him crashing through the floor, creating more spots to fall through. Interesting though when Miles falls, he falls upwards, which if you're aware of the upside-down imagery of the Spiderverse films you'd know that when Miles takes his 'Leap of Faith', he is falling but the camera pans it upside-down to make it look like he is rising to the city - to his responsibilities as Spider-man.

In this case, the inversion is happening. Miles is now Spider-man but he is falling upwards and backwards - he can't see where he is going on this new journey. Then we get one of my favourite transitions in this sequence and that is when Miles stops struggling and goes through one of the spots to become Prowler.

Man, what a cool shot.

But yes, I think the way Spider-man and Prowler deal with the uncontrollability of their situation if interesting here. When we first meet Prowler in the film, he is 100% in control of the situation regarding Miles' capture. But here (and perhaps internally), this isn't so much the case. as Prowler ascends he lets his body go limp as he is engulfed in purple - the colour represented by Prowler and Aaron Davis. Meanwhile Miles' backdrop is blue which I believe represents his father (he wears a blue uniform and a blue shirt in ATSV) as well as half of the Spider-man colours - blue and red. Note: Rio wears a red shirt in this film as well so this would signify that, yes, Miles is strong and therefore Spider-man because of his parents. Furthermore Miles struggle in the blue (father) could represent his struggle to save him from Spot while Prowler's limpness is because his Jefferson is dead.

However, while hued in Prowler purple, we see Rio's large head watches anxiously as a small Spider-man adapts to his situation and reaches upwards while multiple Prowlers in the background don't move at all. I don't think it's too difficult to interpret what Rio is reacting to. Rio is likely reacting to learning who Spider-man and Prowler are, but her expression is not so much as fear but concern for her son/s. Likewise with Spot and the Earth-42 spider, Rio is magnified in Miles' mind. By the end of the film, he summons the courage to tell Rio he is Spider-man, but it wasn't enough. Now Miles needs to reconcile with this alternative identity as the Prowler. An identity that was a villain in his dimension and who might not be willing to reveal that information to his Rio.

As Miles ascends, he sees his father basked in a red background (danger, blood) and likewise, he is giant. Once again all these people in Miles' life are overwhelming for him and are constantly just out of reach. When I watch this scene, I am reminded of the Andrew Garfield's Spider-man trying and failing to save Gwen Stacy. Similarly, Miles reaches for his father but it's not enough, and it doesn't help that the very person trying to prevent him from saving him is waiting through one of the spots.

Much like throughout the movie, Miguel assumes a predatory role as he watches for Miles before fully jumping through the hole. He then swings along to catch up with Miles before appearing as another giant force to contend with.

Interestingly, Miguel stops swinging and instead claws at Miles to catch him. Like the Spot, Miguel serves a similar role in threatening Miles' existence as Spider-man by trying to control him and fit him into some kind of dichotomy. With Spot, it's becoming Miles' nemesis even though Miles doesn't really care. With Miguel, it's making him experience a trauma based on self-projection and as Miles says, "an algorithm". Because that's the way it has to be. It has to be this big tragic origin story with nemesises and trauma.

But then Miles turns around with a response. No. We don't see him turn to face Miguel (we have to think this because Miguel just disappears) but after watching the movie, we know Miles doesn't view the Spider society with the same rose-tinted classes anymore - and this includes Gwen.

Speaking of, we see Gwen swing from portal to portal, presumably in search of Miles but is unable to find him. They swing in opposite directions, implicating their own separate journeys throughout the film but unlike the other characters beside Prowler, Gwen is scaled the same size as Miles. Pink is often used to signify romance and I believe this speaks to their reconciliation in the next film, but interestingly Miles does not seek out Gwen is return. Even if they do become a couple in the next film I feel like Miles' perception of Gwen has definitely changed and he no longer has this sketchbook-drawing idea of her anymore.

But instead of seeking out Gwen, Miles comes face to face with his reflection in a spot. He's confused for a moment before taking a step back and seeing it's Earth-42 Aaron. In the first film, Aaron was a source of comfort for Miles when his father didn't understand him. Now his living-ghost serves as another obstacle in his path and a reflection of who he could've been if not for the spider bite. This is further emphasised by how Aaron is framed exactly like the Earth-42 Spider, and in the next movie I feel like no matter how much Aaron and Miles loved each other, Aaron's influence would've led Miles on a very dark path if not for the morals instilled by his father.

Then Miles runs through another spot and is being chased again by giant versions of Miguel and Spider society. Specifically, they run after him, reminding us how Miguel is "not like the others," and his influence of the other Spider-people is detrimental to the Spider-man identity.

But then Miles swings away from them and we see the Spider-people again but scaled to his size, showing us that in the end how Miles embodies the Spider-man identity better than any other character in the film - "You're the best of all of us, Miles."

But even though Miles is swinging along with the rest of his Spider counterparts, he dimension travels through one of the spots or portal and this time it's a choice. He's not struggling anymore, he's letting the portal take him to where he needs to be and that is into the eye of a young Miles Morales from the first movie who doesn't have his fade yet. Miles remembers Rio's words about looking after his inner "little boy" and before we can pull out to see that little boy's full face...

The camera turns in another cool transition around the back of Miles' head to reveal Prowler standing face-to-face with Spider-man, both masked but not assuming any threatening body language. While Spider-man and Prowler were on unequal footing by the end of ATSV, here there is a sense of self-reconciliation and understanding. That no matter how giant Miles' problems are with the Spot, Miguel, Rio, Jefferson, Aaron or Spider-society, he will always have himself.

Roisee sings the bridge of 'Am I Dreaming' during this part and it completely encapusates Spider-man and Prowler's dynamic. Especially the lines, 'I choose me now, What's wrong with that?' - Straight chills. There's just so many layers.

Coming to an end now, the camera pans around Spider-man and Prowler disappears, presumably letting him return to his dimension, and Miles runs through his hoodie from the first film when he took that first 'Leap of Faith'.

This right here is the defining moment of Miles' Spider-man identity. It wasn't getting bite, it wasn't Uncle Aaron dying, it wasn't the training from Peter and Gwen and it certainly wasn't Miguel denying his identity.

It was right here on that rooftop when he decided to take the 'Leap of Faith' and chose to become Spider-man.

[fraylin]

An Aeka Fictive's Guide to Watching "Tenchi Muyo!", part 1: the OVA continuity

Greetings, friends, mutuals, partners, metamours, and perfect strangers! Perhaps you are wondering what this anime franchise is in which I seem to be deeply invested? Well, worry not! I am here to rant at you about it.

Beginning in 1992, the Tenchi Muyo! franchise is one of the more sprawling and complex canons of anime. It was one of the first anime to make it big in the west among self-identified anime fans, while the market was stll struggling with popular appeal. It eventually aired on the Cartoon Network's Toonami block and became a nostalgic hit for viewers who were too removed from affordable rentals of the VHS cassettes and later DVD releases; a generation or two of fans now fondly remember the characters with adaptations for the American market like adding in a "Y" to the character Aeka's name under the assumption English speakers would read the "ae" as singular sound, instead of two distinct vowels.

From the OAVs (Original Animated Videos) that started it all, through the multiple TV shows, theatrical releases, spin-offs, video games, novels, and two distinct continuities of prose fiction, it can be a little overwhelming.

That, in a very literal sense, is why I am here. My name is Aidel Rayarvol-Spillbaum, and I am a fictive of Masaki Aeka Jurai. As someone whose identity is founded on the Tenchi Muyo! franchise (and a princess in particular) as a source, you can be assured that I have strong opinions that are rooted in being well-informed about the franchise's history and diverse incarnations.

The first thing you should know:

The majority of the Tenchi franchise as it stands at present is utter rubbish that I would only recommend as an example of "what not to do". The problem, you see, is rooted in that sprawling nature. Thus, here is your guide to what to watch and read, and what to avoid.

(For consistency's sake, all character and creators names will be given in the format of their country of origin; Family Name and then Given Name for the characters and Japanese crew, Given Name and then Family Name for the Canadian/American crew)

Tenchi Muyo: Ryo-Ohki

The series that started it all—unless you count a single-frame glimpse of a prototype design of Ryoko to be found in the midst of an episode of Ranma ½ Nettōhen.

Ah yes, that legendary Ranma fandom favorite, Ryoko from Tenchi Muyo!

But first, some wordplay: "Tenchi Muyo!" as a title is written 天地無用, more often seen on packaging as the Japanese equivalent of "This Side Up". It roughly means "Do Not Switch Top And Bottom", and is written with characters more often interprested as "Heaven and Earth" and "Useless", with the switch/reversal part being implied. It suggests the upheaval of the main character's lifestyle...while also giving us a secondary meaning: "Tenchi is Useless", or in the more canonized English translation No Need for Tenchi.

(via characterdesignreferences.com)

That, in four kanji, is the plot: a boy named Tenchi has his life flipped upside down and I'd like to take a minute just sit right there by the arrival of a seemingly ever-growing collection of beautiful alien women who squabble over him to the point that he might as well not even be present. It is what western anime fans think of as the standard of the "harem" genre: a seemingly unremarkable boy attracts improbable numbers of unusually attractive (and often just unusual) women who for some reason think he's the greatest thing to come out of Japan since miso paste.

Spoiling the plot beyond that is no more necessary than Tenchi himself, since the OAV series began as a mere six episodes, going from Ryoko Resurrected to We Need Tenchi, followed by the bonus The Night Before the Carnival. Featuring concepts by ThunderCats animator Hayashi Hiroki and the Okayama-born Kajishima Masaki , this first batch of canon had scripts written by Hasegawa Naoko and are highly recommended as an introduction to the franchise.

This is where things become immediately complicated.

Kajishima lent his given name to the series's protagonist Masaki Tenchi as a family name, and pushed for the action that didn't take in space to be set in a quiet rural part of the Okayama Prefecture. Kajishima claims that the ideas that came out of him working with Hayashi were based on ideas he'd been working on since he was a teenager...while Hayashi's account suggests that the concepts were more the result of his and Kajishima's original pitch having been a Bubblegum Crisis spin-off as a slice-of-life comedy.

What's evident is that Kajishima had some big ideas for the series that he wasn't clearly communicating to others; Hasegawa would later recount how often details of the vision he shared with her during her writing of the scripts for the first six episodes (and a later series of Tenchi Muyo! light novels she authored) were after-the-fact, shocking her with major character reveals that probably could have better informed characterization in those first few episodes.

The thing was, the fans wanted more. Tenchi Muyo! was a hit, and spun off into the aforementioned novels by Hasegawa. An author's note from the first novel (One Visitor After Another: Hexagram of Love) reveals just how complicated this became:

Well, y’see I’ve kinda just about finished my first novel. Are you absolutely sure...

(via Tenchi Muyo! FAQ)

Released starting in May of '93 when the fandom was still waiting for more, Hasegawa's light novel series offered development for which the fans were desperate, and established the first divergent reality, the "Hasegawa Canon" that was for a time considered by the Japanese fandom to be part of the official OAV continuity. The first novel introduced concepts like the connection between Tsunami and Washu...as well as a fan-favorite character that many western fans don't know got her start in this branch of the OAVs, Mihoshi's partner Makibi Kiyone.

(image via No Need to Review Tenchi)

The light novels have yet to get an official English translation of any sort, but for a time, these (and an assortment of audio-only CD dramas introducing new characters and plots) were enough for the Japanese fandom....

But only for a time. At the onset of 1994, a manga began to be released, with art and stories by a little-known mangaka, Okuda Hitoshi. Okuda's characteristic style (further developed in his original series Detatoko Princess) shines through in his interpretations of the character designs.

The writing and art has a much more "gag manga" feel to it, even when the story turns serious. Still, it was some of the earliest Tenchi content this system's previous host had available to her, and so I have a certain fondness for it and the new characters it introduced, like the nervous shipwright Asahi, and Ryoko's much more meek and kindly clone Minagi.

The official translation also dates back to when English language publishers would flip the art for an American audience. Check which version you've picked up: left to right, or right to left?

The different tone carries into jokes like the characters debating who would be who among the characters in a Mito Komon parody, pointing out sound effects as if they were physical objects, or referencing the relative density of the screentone used to render Mihoshi's comparatively darker skin.

The later run of the manga was able to take advantage of details communicated in the light novels (perhaps as well as Kajishima's self-published dōjinshi full of sketches and concepts), such as Aeka's hair being naturally a curly blue-green.

The manga assumes you watched the first six episodes of the OAV, and marks a second branching continuity from them...soon followed by a third:

The little-known Tenchi Muyo! Ryo-Ohki game for the PC Engine (and later remade with bonus material for the PC-FX) split off into its own short-lived continuity. The game borrowed Kiyone and introduced another Galaxy Police officer, the high-strung and intense Hakua, voiced by Suzuki Masami in a performance so identicaly to her portrayal of Amelia wil Tesla Saillune in the Slayers anime that you can effectively know everything you need to know about Hakua by thinking of her as "Amelia from Slayers, as a space cop".

Other characters made minor appearances in both the original and remake, including the little-known Earthling Makura from the drama CDs showing up here as a pizza delivery girl and martial artist...are we certain that Ranma 1/2 is not part of the Tenchi Muyo! franchise?

(Makura defends Aeka, via Legendaryanimefanjp1's playthrough)

But such a high degree of popularity meant that the OAV's creators could not leave well enough alone. Come the Fall of 1994, the next batch of six OAV episodes began, focused on a storyline about Ryoko being replaced by a duplicate...and then visits from the adults of the royal throuple family of Jurai.

The start of the second batch of episodes marks the departure of Hasegawa and Hayashi from the franchise; Hayashi expressed both a dissatisfaction with how the characters turned out compared to his vision, and a disinterest in getting involved in Tenchi as such a large-scale project. It is in these episodes and the following light novels more directly co-written by Kajishima that we start to see Kajishima's ideal for the franchise starting to take shape, with a deeply complicated family tree that unfortunately means every major cast member is somehow related to another.

For almost a decade, that was it for the OAV continuity. And, in my opinion...that's the limit of what you need to worry about.

2003 brought a third OAV series that introduced yet another member of the harem and Mihoshi's weird little brother, 2016 saw a fourth series that focused on Tenchi's father remarrying and the development of relationships and expectations placed on Tenchi and his multiple love interests, and ing 2020 a fifth series developed plot points from the spinoffs and Japan-only novels and firmly established that Tenchi would marry all of the girls. 2002 brought us Tenchi Muyo! GXP, a spin-off focused on a luckless childhood friend of Tenchi being effectively press-ganged into joining the Galaxy Police and given his own harem, while 2009 gave us War on Geminar, a spin-off focused on Tenchi's half-brother getting isekai'ed and becoming the protagonist of his own harem.

Are you noticing a pattern, there? Well, don't worry about it too much: it's all garbage. GXP is almost watchable, but Kajishima considered it a failure of his vision due to directorial interference, and wrote another series of light novels focused on making sure that protagonist Seina's harem got even bigger and more complicated—a plan eventually realized in last year's Paradise Starting OAV.

Don't recognize any of these characters? Well, you see, you'd need to have read the spinoff novels that were never translated into English...and be familiar with the prose-only untranslated alternate canon of another spinoff...and possibly a bit drunk because by that point I cannot imagine you wanting to be sober....

As I said, the OAV continuity beyond the second series is not recommended. The shift to digipaint weathered a lot of the charm of the visuals, while an excessive use of badly-integrated CG for vehicles (including poor Ryo-Ohki) took that weathered charm and tossed it in the garbage. Both the original Japanese and the English dub are affected by the death or departure of the original voice actors for major characters.

In summary: the only parts of the OAV continuity that I can really recommend to an audience that is not fluent in Japanese are the first two series, and the Okuda manga.

Join us next time, when I tackle the multiple TV series continuities...or at least, the only one worth watching.

[stellas-starry-sillies13]

okay hi stella!! this is for the matchup reqs

so for gender boy pls <3

probably blue lock for the fandom (pjsk will probably get a lot of attention and i'm highly obsessed with bllk rn if you couldn't tell lmao)

for my personality i can be rlly shy and awkward when you first meet me, but once you get close to me i'll start acting how i usually do, being friendly and silly (insane and bouncing off the walls) i am definitely an introvert but i can be extroverted to people i'm close with. i'm super insecure sometimes and i get stressed, anxious, and overwhelmed easily

good personality traits are: kind, caring, selfless, good listener, funny

bad personality traits are: too selfless (i stop caring about what i want and only listen to what other people want), annoying (sometimes), when i'm tired i get very lazy

my love language is 100% physical touch, and i like to receive words of affirmation and physical touch

i'm very sensitive to being excluded, disappointing or letting people down, and i feel guilty when people worry about me

hobbies are drawing, reading, playing violin, playing games and watching tv (anime)

some talents i have are writing, playing my violin, and i'm a pretty fast runner! ^^

i'm a-okay with any age range as long as they're a minor! (bc i'm a minor)

so i'm assuming the only characters from bllk i can be matched up with are the ones you could write for from your previous blog (which off the top of my head was isagi, bachira, chigiri, nagi, reo, and rin???) so out of those 6 i wouldn't want to be matched up with isagi or nagi

what i don't want in a partner would be them telling me off or getting mad at me over small things, or just being an ass in general

what i would want in a partner would be them being really kind and willing to help me with whatever i need, and also someone that loves me for me ^^; and will help me feel better about myself

OKAYYYY that's all ty Stella!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

` . < Bluelock Matchup No.1~! > . '

A/N: HIIII WA ER BO LE.girl. in case you didnt know, someone who is introverted around strangers/acquiantances but extroverted around friends is called an ambivert LOL. Like me :p also im sensitive to being excluded too you have no idea. We kin each other. I kin all my moots. Anyway hop you like this ! !!!!! Thank you for requesting :3

For the grand reveal, I match you up with....

` . < Bachira Meguru~! > . '

A/N: he is literally PERFECT for you.physical affectin? ✔ words of affirmation? ✔ loves yuforo you? ✔ Helps you wuth every single thing to exist? ✔ like wow. Anyway hope you like this

Loves how energetic you are

You guys can bounce off the walls together

You guys are actually probably high on sugar

He loves that youre selfless but he definitely stops you if you go too far

Imagine someones trying to take advantage of your kindess and hes just. Staring. at them. With that huge smile. And those scribble eyes.

Yeah he'll just scare them off

His giving love language probably physical touch so like. No worries. Hes a cuddlebug. He'd also definitely be very affirming with words. He compliments your everything.

You guys probably have races all the time just because you say youre fast. He probably introduces you to chigiri

Also he will always include if youre in a group.

Though lets be honest, you dont need anyone but him anyway

[moonrisecoeur]

i have been. debating sending this bc i know i am cringe. op i am so sorry feel free to ignore and delete bc this is just actual pure filth lmfaooo

op i literally think about pegging leon 24/7 its a full time JOB inside my brain i need to peg that man so fucking Bad its not even funny. i know hes so fucking Noisy. i wanna make him beg for my strap, i wanna fucking edge him until hes begging and crying to be fucking ruined. i wanna pretty him up, put eyeliner on him so i can make it run down his face from fucking him so hard. i wanna mark up his neck and pull his hair while i pulverize him. i wanna tell him hes taking it so well and how hes such a good boy, how pretty he looks bent over for me while i fuck his cute ass. i want him to hug me while i praise him bc hes so overwhelmed. tell him how hot it is hearing him moan and whine, encourage him to make as much noise as he wants, itd be cute to watch him try to not pillow bite because hes trying sooo hard to do what you want like a good boy. i want him to be borderline Incomprehensible, voice shaking and cracking as he tells me how much he loves me, how much he loves the way i make him feel. i wanna make him cum untouched. i wanna overstimulate him. i wanna grope his fat tits and milk his dick. i wanna make him watch himself getting fucked. put him in a collar, lingerie, fuck anything-hed be gorgeous no matter what he wears. shower him in kisses and affection and make him feel the most loved he has in his entire LIFE while short circuiting his brain n marking him with bites and bruises for everyone to see.

re2 leon is my fave man he has my heart and god id love to just take care of him. after a long shift i wanna slam him against the door and fuck him while hes still in uniform. make him feel so good. such a whiny cutie. cuff him up and bite his freckles while i fuck him late into the night, clean him up and cuddle him after, make him breakfast in the morning n give him kisses.

re4/re6/older leon is a subby bitch too. just as god damn fine and id do oh so horrific things to him. hed love it so much, not having to think, make decisions, take charge. just let me whatever i want to him. hed get off so hard being under you and told how fucking good, pretty, perfect he is. he needs your approval so fucking bad-its all that poor man wants, god he needs it so BAD. he needs to feel safe and loved and wanted, like this is Critical. id make SURE i fuck him so good he cant even think about his insecurities or problems. and dear fucking lord do not get me started on that slutty waist and button down of his in re6. he's keeping the gloves on while i press his hands into the mattress and bite his arms.

its so fucking funny bc i hc leon as a switch BUT GODDDDD SUBBY LEON MAKES ME FUCKING FOAM AT THE MOUTH LIKE A RABID, FERAL ANIMAL

its not a want it is a NEED

I NEED THIS MAN UNDER ME I NEED TO REARRANGE HIS GUTS !!!!!!!!!!!!

guhhh last anon again but now i really cant stop thinkin about sub leon. legit i have so much more to say i just love him so much. theres so much. More. i wanna say but lord. im trying so hard to be normal man 😭😭

first off. hi. hope u had a yummy thanksgiving if u celebrate it and if not i also hope ur having a good day !!

ALSO WTF WHY WOULD I DELETE THIS i literally woke up this morning and checked my tumblr notifs as one does and i literally see this behemoth of an ask and im reading through and im literally screaming bc why is this my internal monologue. like. did u get inside my head or something??? did u steal this from my brain bc i literally think about this approximately 1000 times a day.

i’ll literally be at work and my thoughts be like ughhh i wanna hurt him and make him cry but also want to love him and take care of him but also want to fuck him so so slow and deep i can feel it moving around if i put on hand on his abdomen and then i just spiral and then i remember im making a fuckin caramel macchiato or something >.<

so!! in spirit of our delusion i’m planning to write smthin for u based off of this vibe!! just give me a lil bit 👉👈

BUT TELL ME EVERYTHING TELL ME ALL UR THOUGHTS I WANT TO HEAR THEM ALL I WANT TO KNOWWWW ‘i have so much more to say’ okay prove it. tell me everything