#I am just simply
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heyo friends and beloveds i am simply sorry about being so behind on asks tbh my tumblr routine these days is logging in once a day, scrolling through like 5 posts max on the dash, and calling it a day
i will get to them though!!! i love talking 2 yall ! <3 🥰
#when will i get to them? i cannot say#but feel free to send all the things#i am not ignoring u all#i am just simply#not performing my designated girl blogger role atm#🩷🩷🩷#kay bye#nat speaks
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I already hate small talk a lot because while I know it is the starting point for human relationships, it also feels so fucking performative most of the time, but there IS a special circle of hell version of it where someone you were once incredibly close to (who perhaps maybe was the person who knew you best in the whole world) is now giving you all the classic small talk conversation points because one, they are very much living the performance of 'actually I am friends with everyone and I have to keep up appearances' even tho they were the one who dropped you like a hot potato multiple times, and two, because they are the one who hasn't cared what's going on in your life for 2+ years so they really only can ask the typical small talk questions because they know literally nothing about your life now 🙃
#about me#please ignore#I am just simply#going through it#I am SO TIRED OF THIS#I got the most generic 'happy birthday' message from her this year when years ago we would have a multiple hour phone convo on each of our#birthdays instead#and that was jarring enough#but I was like WHATEVER I am mostly over it#but now she is giving me the classic 'how have you been? how is uni' questions WHEN SHE HASN'T CARED IN YEARS#and I indulged her and answered#AND WAS LEFT ON READ FOR OVER A WEEK AGAIN#I never learn I guess#there are like at least 30 messages from three/two years ago where I tried to reinitiate a conversation and she straight up ghosted me#but now she wants to do small talk? NOW????#my best friend says fuck her and to just ignore her#but that feels so fucking impolite
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non-practicing slut. is this anythign
#this post is not about being ace i am actually the furthest thing from ace one could be#im simply a massive virgin loser#just putting that out there#more power to you if yourelate to it for that reason thoughb
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BTW... PSA.... even if we arent mutuals if youre in my notes regularly theres a Very high chance i am still fond of you. yes im vaguing someones tags on the compliment the person u rbed this from post. but like. positive vaguing? THE POINT IS im weird abt following ppl but IM STILL SENDING U FOND VIBES...
#i have to acclimate myself into following people. first i have to spend a few days to weeks checking someones blog manually#and i cant follow too many new people in the same burst or else theres TOO MUCH new unfamiliarity on my dash#and i become a small and easily frightened beast alarmed by change#also im just....................... incredibly picky kjhsdkjjkdsj sometimes ppl i generally am :)! towards do occasionally rb#from someone who i want to throw bricks at. and then i cant follow them but im still :)! when i see them in notifs#and sometimes its just that im going AAAA!!! AAAA!!! and cant put more new things on my dash#or in some cases its someone im fond of seeing/chatting w whenever we have talked BUT they simply are also into stuff im not rly into#and i dont want it on my dash despite liking them as a person. etc. you know how it is#ALL OF WHICH TO SAY................... :)!#rimi talks
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humble contribution
#basic: interpreting mizu’s gender based on what u think fits best#based wired inspired: interpreting mizu’s gender based on the ship so that it’s always a gay relationship#also whoever drew taigen’s nose Like That..#i am forever thankful i need to kiss them with tongue#ode to taigen’s nose: page 1 of 204737835737493#did i spend too long on this instead of just simply grabbing screenshots? look away#blue eye samurai#mizu#akemi#taigen#taigen’s top knot before it met its early end teach the angels how to sing baby 😔🙏#ringo#my art#yuri is when there’s blood and themes yaoi is two blokes who do fuck all
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steam still hasnt approved my fucming build but at least its finally warm enough for me to put on the classic bunlith fit so its not all bad ig,,
#goth#trans#transgender#lgbt#no u fool#u see i didnt just lose one of my fishnet arm thingies#im simply living up to my nomura belt goth roots and am embracing ~asymmetry~
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couple people coming over in three hours so the only logical course of action is to sit here and think about that and do nothing else
#full on party or literally just three close friends don't matter#i will simply stare at the clock#i am darryl in the Having A Few People Over song 100% of the time
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if I see one more post about Aegon “bullying Aemond his entire life”, I will go fucking ballistic, I swear to g—
scratch that, I will actually go ballistic right now. this is the “Aegon doesn’t deserve such a shitty treatment” club and I’m the self-proclaimed CEO. we are about to do some analyzing and reading so BUCKLE UP.
gonna make one thing clear first — Aemond was bullied when he was a child. no one denies that, no excuses can be made for that. I’d only like to note that there wasn’t only one bully. here’s a quick reminder:
now that we successfully counted to three, let’s look over Aegon’s other horrible crimes relationship with Aemond throughout the years.
📍 the night Aemond lost his eye (S1EP7), Rhaenyra suggests he should be “sharply questioned” (she means tortured) so they can learn who told him that her sons were bastards. Viserys, in his perpetual denial, angrily asks Aemond “who spoke these lies” to which he replies that it was Aegon. it is clear that Aemond does that to deflect suspicion from their mother but his words come as a surprise to Aegon.
he’s in a tough spot — Viserys demands the answers “as their king”, not their father (to signify his authority and pressure them into telling the truth). and Alicent screamed in Aegon’s face and slapped him just a minute ago, so he may be less eager to defend her. he can easily lie and say that he overheard some maids gossiping or that he can’t remember where the rumor came from. instead, it takes Aegon about 5 seconds to back Aemond up.
📍 we didn’t get many scenes with young Aegon and Aemond in general, but here’s a short bit people keep overlooking: when Harwin and Criston start fighting, Aemond and Aegon instantly gravitate toward each other. and moreover, Aegon puts a hand over Aemond’s back (which to me is either a protective or a comforting gesture). what a horrible brother, truly.
📍 next we see them all grown up before dinner in S1EP8. I think it’s safe to assume that if Aegon has been bullying Aemond all these years, Aemond wouldn’t want to spend a second in his company. he’s seated between Helaena and Otto, both of whom are dear to him, so Aemond can stay at the table and chat with them. and YET, not only does Aemond voluntarily talks to Aegon, but their conversation seems friendly (you can barely hear it in the show so here’s the enhanced audio). Aemond makes a joke about Aegon’s drinking habits — Aegon quips back — and then, what a shocker! Aemond starts venting his frustrations to Aegon (“Even when the noose is so tight, they expect us to break bread”). nothing would’ve stopped him from venting to Otto but Aemond stays with Aegon. he wouldn’t have done that if there hadn’t been some level of trust between them. he wouldn’t have done that if he hated Aegon’s guts.
📍 at dinner, when Aegon pisses Jace off and the brunet springs to his feet, Aemond stands up too, which forces Jace to act as if nothing happened and come up with a toast. Aegon watches him with a shit-eating grin on his face. it’s the face that screams “I know you won’t dare to act up in front of my brother and my brother has my back”.
when Aemond makes a toast and calls Rhaenyra’s sons “strong”, Aegon raises a cup to that. he can sit this one out — Aemond has his personal vendetta against the boys, and it would be safer for Aegon not to meddle. but what does he do instead? when Luke gets up from the table (clearly intending to go to Aemond), Aegon instantly stands up, comes up to Luke and not just stops him but slams his face into the table right in front of Rhaenyra without thinking twice. and it doesn’t look like Aegon is just messing with him — no, it looks like he wanted to do that for a while. like Aegon finally got his chance to stand up for his brother too. AND he also stops Baela from joining the fight.
📍 S1EP9 is when we get a glimpse of Aemond’s ambitions: he deems himself better than Aegon, he thinks he deserves to be king. but once he finds Aegon and they get into a fight, it turns out that Aegon knows that Aemond is a better choice. he doesn’t want to fight him, he begs Aemond to let him go. and Aemond can do that — Criston has his back to them, so Aemond could’ve pretended that Aegon managed to break free. and even once they caught Aegon, I have no doubt that Aemond could’ve helped him escape. but it seems that, despite his displeasure, Aemond values his family the most. he can’t betray his mother’s trust, and he knows Aegon is the first in line to the throne. Aemond envies him, yes, he may even hate him because of that. but he values his family the most.
📍 as @florisbaratheons noted, during the coronation scene, when Aegon glances at his family, Aemond looks right at him and gives that tiny nod that says “I may hate this and think I am better for the job as king. But I’ve got your back.” I like that Aemond is the one who keeps eye contact in that scene. He could’ve turned away to signal his dissatisfaction with the situation, there wouldn’t have been any consequences for that. But he didn’t.
📍 what I find interesting about S1EP10 is the beginning of Aemond’s dialogue with Luke. that’s the boy Aemond wished to get back at for years and yet, he starts by saying “Did you think that you could just fly about the realm trying to steal my brother’s throne at no cost?”. Aemond could’ve skipped that part — imagine him saying smth along the lines of “Wait, Lord Strong! Don’t you think you and I have other matters to discuss?” (to which Luke answers that he doesn’t want to fight and the conversation goes on). instead, Aemond makes a point to remind Luke: my brother is the king, and I came here on his behalf. you can argue that Aemond doesn’t do it for Aegon specifically but for his family in general. but Aegon is a part of the family, and S1 Aemond has his priorities straight.
📍 as much as I hate comparing the show and the book (these are two different things and should be viewed as such), I’d like to remind you that Aegon was the only one who stood by Aemond’s side after Luke’s death. I wonder why we didn’t get that scene… I guess it’s because it would be kinda hard to call Aegon “the main bully” after he literally throws Aemond a feast. but we do get to see Aegon supporting his brother: in S2EP1 he welcomes Aemond at the small council meeting despite his mother’s protests (“Aemond is my closest blood and my best sword”). and he trusts Aemond wholeheartedly, that much is obvious.
📍 let’s get to the most controversial part — the brothel scene in S2EP3: some people believe Aegon is being a bully at that moment. those people seem to forget one little detail:
it’s been only a few days after the death of Aegon’s son whose murder was a direct result of Aemond’s ruthless actions. does Aemond ever address it? does he express his condolences? does he mayhaps help to catch the killers, being the skilled fighter that he is? the answer is NO.
I do think Aegon’s joke was cruel (I wrote a whole post about it) but that’s all it ever was — a JOKE. the humiliation comes not from the things he says but from the fact that Aemond is found in a vulnerable position and surrounded by a group of strangers while his brother laughs at him. TGC explained it best:
I also love @notbloodraven’s take on that scene:
Aegon lashing out so cruelly at Aemond seems to be an effort in making Aemond feel as badly as he does and blaming him for Jaehaerys without actually saying the words.
would this be the right way to act? no. but there’s no right way to grieve and to cope with the loss — and HIS SON WAS BEHEADED so maybe take 1% of the sympathy you show your favorite character(s) and cut Aegon some slack.
+ other things worth talking about:
📍 @bietrofastimoff23 analyzed S2EP3 beautifully and I can’t help but mention the scene that happens before Aegon goes to the brothel. it’s the moment when Larys suggests that Alicent and Aemond are plotting against Aegon. he isn’t surprised by the idea that his mother can do that — but the second his brother is mentioned, Aegon’s face falls and he shakes his head no. because there is no way Aemond would ever do that to him. and instead of asking for any proof, he asks Larys “who spreads these lies?” and then commands him to “tend to them.” Aegon can ask him to spy on Aemond, to find any dirt on him, find any weaknesses he can use — he does not.
📍 it turns out to be true — Aemond was plotting behind his brother’s back. which is treason btw (I don’t think Criston intended to keep things from Aegon — he probably believed that Aemond would let Aegon in on their plan). and Aegon does have the power to remind Aemond of his place — he can throw him off the council with a snap of his fingers, he can take offense at Aemond’s attempt to publicly humiliate him (their conversation in High Valyrian — Ewan himself calls it a “public execution”). but that’s not what happens: as TGC phrased it, Aemond’s betrayal “breaks a bit of Aegon’s heart off”. an actual bully would’ve immediately pushed back, but Aegon silently sits down and doesn’t argue, he’s so defeated he can’t utter a word. he has the means to be a bully but he doesn’t contemplate it for a second.
📍 I don’t want to talk about S2EP6 because it makes me sick but I will reiterate one thing: never ONCE Aegon made fun of Aemond’s disability or tried to cause him any physical harm. just want to point that out.
there is no moral to this story, I guess. if you managed to read till the very end, thank you. if you still hate Aegon, that’s your opinion and you are allowed to have one — but please, for the love of god, just stop making shit up. no, Aemond was NOT bullied as an adult, absolutely nothing suggests that he was. Aegon was naive to blindly trust him and it backfired on him, that’s the actual story. and if you are so eager to hold Aegon accountable for his mistakes, maybe it’s time for Aemond to take responsibility for his actions too.
+ some of my favorite critical posts about Aegon and Aemond: x, x, x, x, x, x, x, x.
P.S. I will not argue with anyone so please don’t waste your time — I consider all my arguments solid and that’s enough for me. if you are thinking of sending me anon hate, pls go take a walk instead, it will do you more good. 🌿
#aegon ii targaryen#sorry if I sound passive-aggressive guys (I totally am)#I am just so fed up with barbecue jokes and people mocking Aegon’s suffering for no fcking reason#I log on to this hellsite and 90% of the fandom is suddenly like that#so I had to make this post simply for myself (and maybe for 3 other people lol)#to think that people made excuses for Luke who MAIMED Aemond for life and then dared to laugh in his face#but when it comes to Aegon everyone is nitpicking his every move without ever trying to take his feelings into consideration#aegond#aemond targaryen#hotd critical#hotd S2#hotd spoilers#house of the dragon#aegon the second#laura rambles#the greens
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when obi-wan said 'I won't kill anakin' and then spent the entire rest of his life following through on that. fuck everyone else obi-wan I respect you yoda should've taken you at your fucking word
'boohoo why did he walk away and not kill anakin this time either even with all the suffering he'll go on to cause if he lets him go' he's told you why very clearly you just didn't believe him I guess!! desperately not killing anakin is obi-wan's main export. it's his universal constant, his life's work, his magnum opus. he gets creative about not killing that guy. he tries to send anakin's teenage twink son to do the job for him because he simply can't. he fucking... peaces out and dies to avoid killing anakin. that's like his whole deal. whether he's right to be like this is another entirely separate conversation but it is what he is
#also it's a prequel and I think we would have noticed if obi-wan killed vader before luke even met him lol#star wars#obi wan kenobi#if anything it's a thrill to me that he had the chance again and. didn't do it. like I said universal constant#'What if I simply. didn't'. and then he didn't. and was sad about it forever. it's the good stuff#this is entirely performative indignation btw I am not vagueblogging at anyone I'm just waxing histrionic for fun lol
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i personally believe chuuya simply DIY-ed a makeshift leg cast with the stuff he found in prison but ended up bridal carrying dazai out anyways because they wouldn't have made it in time at that pace
bonus:
#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bsd manga#bsd anime#soukoku#skk#skk comic#dazai#chuuya#mersault#skk fanart#fanart#my art#art#comic#he can actually walk just fine he just wanted chuuya to bridal carry him#they didn't want you to know that i am simply filling in the blanks#he also helped him get cleaned up but that was getting into cheesy sappy fluff territory and i can't draw that to save my life#iztea draws
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The constant temptation and promise of everything and nothing in the odyssey. The sirens promise odysseus to know, and the lotus eaters promise him to forget. He could be an immortal, and he could be a beggar. Be known, and be a stranger. He could be alive, and he could be dead. He could be odysseus, and he could be nobody. And the man of many ways tries to be a little bit of everything.
#i've been thinking about this. for months.#i wanted to talk about this by properly writing something but i simply cannot wait. i just have to say it.#i am thinking about this almost every day. it's just. ughhh#i WILL write about this i'm telling you bro#anyways i have so many ideas that make me fall to my knees. but i'm keeping them to myself for now shhhh#niko rambles
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(you are his little cabbage.)
#fobedit#peterick#pete wentz#patrick stump#fob#fall out boy#anni edits#patrick i am afraid you are simply his little cabbage#just cause i couldnt stop thinking about pete yelling at him that he's gorgeous. same
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WHERE IS HE D:
(sorry for deleting and posting this again 🙇♂️🙇♂️ one tiny insignificant thing was bothering me and when I edited it it wouldn't show on reblogs and that kinda made me go 😠😠😠)
#HARRY NO#CROWLEY THIS ISNT FUNNY#CROWLEYYYYYYYY#this was hilarious in my head#it's even more hilarious now#don't worry Harry is safe#Crowley is just simply in the mood for giving his angel a teensy weensy heart attack#or maybe he's just processing the question#maybe he's trying to locate the rabbit by using his ✨snaky sense✨#nahhh he knows where the rabbit is he's just messing around#(he had to watch Aziraphale practice his amazing magic tricks for the entire week leading up to this)#(can you blame him for doing some ✨magic tricks✨ of his own)#(he's a fast learner okay)#(he sure can make rabbits disappear)#(THE RABBIT IS FINE I SWEAR)#(YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE ME)#(WHEN HAVE I EVER LIED TO YOU)#(AM I NOT TRUSTWORTHY GUYS?????)#Crowley what do you mean “blelele”#good omens#crowley#aziraphale#ineffable idiots#ineffable husbands#aziracrow#harry the rabbit
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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I have been in the solavellan fandom for...A While. (do not count the years, i beg) and everyone has their tropes and themes re: wolves/halla and hunter/prey and the New Herald being worshiped/the Old God nearly forgotten, and tbh I like bits and pieces of all of them, but like...
For me, the most compelling story is that Lavellan is just Some Guy (gn).
They meet Solas and accept that he is like them. He's an elf. One of The People. You are like me. I am like you. We are The Same People. And because of that, I will protect you with whatever power the humans around us have given me, because I know this is not the safest place for either of us.
And it just fucking... gets him, right? Because that's his whole deal. The world is broken because the people aren't People. He's not like them. They're not like him.
I just love the idea that this impossibly old, incredibly powerful sort-of-god, trips into a hole and nearly throws his entire game away because a regular person (albeit one who was thrust into extraordinary circumstances) decided to be kind. Offered him protection and friendship. Asked him to tell them stories. Grieved with him when he lost one of his oldest friends.
He could not deny that they were a person, because they treated him like a person.
I love how ordinary that is. How simple. How devastating.
'You're real, and it means everyone could be real. It changes everything, but it can't.'
#Solavellan#solas x lavellan#dragon age#like it's such 'in another life i think i'd have really loved doing laundry and taxes with you' vibes#like to live an extraordinarily long and devastatingly bloody and ultimately lonely life#and then be offered love simply and honestly with no strings or caveats from a person who genuinely just...likes being with you?#RIP buddy i think I'd have gone a bit feral myself#I think this is probably why I am still foaming at the mouth over them a decade later#i have never wanted 2 people to Catch a Fucking Break so badly in my LIFE#let them have their life with laundry and taxes ;_;
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I can’t stand that TikTok trend that’s like “just saw Hadestown and my boyfriend is walking the entire way back to the hotel without looking back at me to prove Orpheus was a chump” because not only do they not get the whole point of the Orpheus and Eurydice myth they also Were Not Paying Attention to the musical they just saw.
Hate people who see WSS as “just a Romeo and Juliet retelling”. Hate people who see Hadestown as “Just an Orpheus and Eurydice retelling”.
Hate people who watch a musical that takes a classic story everyone knows and uses it to explore/critique our modern society and only see it as a funky retelling.
Not Getting The Point of WSS is one thing because it’s more subtle and it can be really easy to just see it as a modern R&J, especially if you don’t really know R&J.
How the fuck do you watch Hadestown and see it as just an O&E retelling? It is one of the most heavy-handed political musicals out there how are so many people missing the point?
Orpheus has to fail. Not because that’s how the Greek myth ends but because that’s the whole point of the message of Hadestown.
Social reform is hard. Changing the world is one of the most challenging things you can try to do. So often we see people try to make a difference in society, to change some kind of injustice in the world. And so often we see those people fail. It can feel so impossible to actually do some good in this fucked up world because we see these people who are smarter and stronger and more qualified than us fail over and over again.
Why do we even keep trying?
Because we have to.
Because one day, someone will try and they’ll succeed.
One day Orpheus won’t turn around.
One day the people of Hadestown will get to see someone escape and they’ll know they can escape too. Only then does the world get to change.
So we have to try. We have to keep singing the sad song, no matter how many times Orpheus turns around, because one day he won’t.
In the Greek myth, Orpheus fails because he loves Eurydice.
In Hadestown, Orpheus fails because we fail.
We try and we fail to make a difference. We try and we fail to change the world for the better. We try to see the world for what it could be and it keeps letting us down.
But we don’t give up. We don’t stop singing.
Hadestown is genuinely one of the best musicals ever. Full stop. This musical is one of the reasons i wish I was smarter because I would love to be able to do an entire thesis on this show and all the themes and messages in it. Some of them are subtle. Some of them aren’t.
It is not just an Orpheus and Eurydice retelling. I am begging people to hear the real message.
Never stop trying to change the world.
One day we’ll make it out of Hadestown.
We just have to keep singing the song.
#i’m sure someone has already said this but i simply Must get my thoughts out into the world#listened to the soundrack on a whim at midnight and started Feeling Things#and now we’re here.#not every musical has a deep underlying message and i understand that the average person won’t always pick up on the ones that do#but how do you watch HADESTOWN and come away only thinking ‘orpheus should have just not turned around’#i am constantly furious about the lack of media literacy running rampant in our world#hadestown#orpheus#eurydice#orpheus and eurydice#greek mythology#musicals#Broadway#saframbles
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