#I am funny
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buddiehasmyheart · 2 months ago
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*eddies first day at the 118*
bobby: welcome to the gay-eighteen
eddie: uh- i’m not gay?
bobby: you will be by the end of shift, come with me i’ve got the perfect person you need to meet.
bobby: BUCK! come meet eddie, you two are going to get into an extreme partnership. you’re going to be baby trapped with his kid, co-parent his kid, look at each other longingly until eddie here has the balls to admit he likes men and then kiss and get married.
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Old man Daniel Molloy during the Loumand fight:
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trans-wojak · 10 months ago
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Either join their war or stfu I’m sick of y’all clogging up my feeds
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hotcacaonoice · 8 months ago
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Things I’ve texted my roommates as PJO /HOO characters:
Idk just thought it would be fun…
Leo: did you know that women spout milk out of their breasts like a cow water fountain?
Percy: my breath smells like cucumber
Nico: I AM ITALIAN
Will: 😃😃😃😃😃men !!!!!😃😃😃😃 men in love!!! 😃😃👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨
Jason: doing the NYT crossword and then bedtime.
Annabeth: if I don’t finish all my work, I will have to put myself down.
Piper: what do you think they will say if I offer them a vagel (vagina bagel)
Also Nico: do you guys want play by play following people home updates
Lester: at your funeral I will sing ding dong the witch is dead (with love)
Grover: I’m shaking for some reason. Am I anxious? I cannot tell. Never mind I just had too much coffee
Frank: I know one blond man and he is a jumpscare.
Hazel: please ignore the fact that I look like I just saw naked grandma
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lunozapp · 2 months ago
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nathancomet · 3 months ago
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Me Writing at Midnight:
When I write in a late-night creative rush with all the feels, one of two things always happen.
1. I have crafted starlight in the form of words
2. Shakespeare is rolling over in his grave
There is no in-between.
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knownoshamc · 5 months ago
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What if Louis figures out that Armand was and is in love with Daniel, in a "aha!" moment like in the good place. Like there is a moment in which Armand is 😍 at Daniel and Louis just connects the dots "Wait a minute... This is whom you love!" Bonus if Armand erases his memory every time Louis figures it out.
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wifeyoozi · 4 months ago
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Not what I meant when I wanted shua creaming
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smashstiel · 23 days ago
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@romanticfistfightz had a vision
(for nonpolish speakers. its basically like. "delete this" "i wont bc i love you")
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dumbest-of-cunts · 1 year ago
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I felt this deep in my soul
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crown-eats-rocks · 7 months ago
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the unstoppable force and immovable object are dating btw. AND they’re gay
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13-hadley · 2 years ago
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hi tumblr today i come to you with the funniest thing i have ever made. tomorrow? who knows. (nothing)
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"What's your favorite fruit?"
Me: This one.
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which-qsmp-egg-would · 27 days ago
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Is there any of the egg ask polls do you think Poll or Tequila could win or be good contenders for?
memory related trauma /hj
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vreetea · 5 months ago
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Has this been done before??? I wouldn’t know.
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sparklyeyedhimbo · 1 year ago
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sprite: *standing around with his bangs parted* first: HEY who the fuck are you sprite: *pushes his bangs together* first:...oh it's you, zee sprite: *parts his bangs* first:..HEY where did zee go? sprite:
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