#I am SO SICK OF THESE PEOPLE DMING ME | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

star-on-a-beach · 2 months ago

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Hi, important thing that I'm just saying now.

Unless you ACTUALLY HAVE SOMETHING TO TALK ABOUT and don't just want my attention, please don't constantly DM me. Every so often is okay, but I honestly get really kinda annoyed if I'm constantly DMed things that have no real meaning or I can't really respond to them.

I am not a silly person. I don't usually reciprocate silliness. I don't know how to respond to random things usually, and I get annoyed doing so because I don't understand, I don't like being silly in random senses- and tbh I don't really like being actually silly all that much at all, except for rare cases.

Is it ok to dm me something random every so often? Yeah, go ahead. I don't mind if it's not constant.

But I really, really, really don't like being DMed random things that I can't respond to constantly, multiple times a day, and DMing me after I very clearly do not respond because I'm busy or don't have the mental capacity for it. Whatever the reason, and whether you want me to respond or not (why would you be DMing me if you didnt want me to respond, i dont know), it's not fun for me to be receiving those notifs all the time.

Once again. OCCASIONAL is fine. And by occasional, I mean every few days. Not every day.

I've tried to be kind about this, but it's gotten to the point I'm flat out not liking DMing anyone anymore because I'm rarely having a gen conversation where the other person is just goofing off when I'm trying to not be. Please. I'm not having fun with it, I'm just getting annoyed. If this keeps up, I'm gonna just flat out ignore any constant random messages.

I'm not saying this is targeted. But I am saying this is a boundary that I now have because I'd rather talk to people when I'm not completely irritated by pointless DMs.

And I'm also gonna say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with doing this if it's your style, it's a me problem, not a you problem. But I am very much not the person you should be DMing with your randomness, I thoroughly dislike it.

And one more thing, you do not have to send me a ton of reminders or send me the same post over and over. I've seen it. I get it. My memory is shit but it's not THAT shit, I struggle to see the point to being sent the same thing or reminder over and over, even if it's just in a comical way.

I'm sorry if I'm acting like a downer. But I'm sick of passive-aggressively trying to tell someone I'm not in the mood for DMs when I have absolutely have no response for the things they send me, then feeling guilty when I consciously ignore them.

If you have any questions (which, I imagine there will be some) then DM me BUT ACTUALLY DM and ask and not just something random

Thank you for reading, I apologize if this came off as hostile, I'm exhausted and annoyed and this is long overdue.

Edit:

I forgot to add, I'm normally not gonna respond to DMs from midnight to 12 PM EST unless they're important or I make an exception. Preferably, if it's not important, please just wait for the morning and let me have my peace. Please.

#important #boundaries

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55sturn · 3 months ago

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okay, so, let me get this straight.

you think that because someone is mutuals with you they're automatically supposed to drop what they're doing to interact with a fic you made.

I think I know who you're talking about when you say that she doesn't interact with your fics and she doesn't "show you love" but like you only hit people up and talk to them when YOU need something, or when YOU need to vent.

and people are required to drop what they're doing in their lives to interact with your fics to make you feel good about yourself, and it shows how jaded you are about it because on that last post you made???

"this flopped so hard" It got almost 300 likes. and you're telling me it flopped?? like show some humility, be humble for once, you aren't famous and you're allowed to be upset about works not doing well but keep it to yourself damn, do you think about all the smaller creators on here that make amazing works and fics that get 0 recognition, because I don't think you do?

when i first joined this app, I considered you to be one of the more popular involved people on this app. I looked up to you and the things that you wrote. I thought "wow, this girl is cool" I don't think that anymore, I think that you believe the world revolves around you and that you're simply mad that you aren't as famous or well-loved as you want to be, so go unpack that with someone else because its embarrassing to spread that shit on here when its clearly your own unresolved issues.

and here's a tip!! if you want to be anywhere near as well-loved and appreciated as the girl we alllll know your talking about, maybe interact with people and stop holding this cold idgaf demeanor to the people that reach out and do want to get to know you, its not working for you and you're not anywhere near as famous as you need to be to pull it off

okay this is a long post so, take it as you will.

i may not express that i’m checking up on them out right all the time, because i’m just dming them about god knows what as a way of seeing how they’re doing because i know that people can sometimes shy away from being directly asked “how are you holding up?”. i know that there has been times where i have reached out to people asking for opinions or ideas out of the blue after not talking for awhile, but i never meant to make them feel like i’m only talking to them because it’s beneficial for me, and because my actions and words have done that, i am extremely sorry because that’s not what i meant to do and it makes me feel sick that that’s exactly what i’ve done, and i wish i could take it back, and i will do whatever i can to make up for it. i would get excited to have others opinions, especially those of my friends, because i hold their opinions in high regard, i figured that interacting over asks and whatnot would count as us being friends and talking, and didn’t see that me dming whoever when i needed an opinion or to vent would take away from what i viewed as us talking, but looking back, i can see how it was misconstrued and interpreted.

you guys genuinely have no clue who i am talking about because i haven’t interacted with them since i deleted my original blog, went awol from the fandom, and started my new one over a year ago and i’ve been trying to interact with them again because we started talking for a little bit over text because we were good friends but things have changed. as for who you believe it is, it’s not them. people can assume what they would like but i promise you, you’d be wrong.

i never said that people were required to interact or support their friends work, i know my wording looked that way but and i completely take full responsibility for my poor choice of explaining what i meant, i know i could’ve done so much better with that. when i get upset that someone doesn’t interact with my fic, it’s because i’m tagging them because i believe i’ve written an idea or concept that they would like, or it’s a concept i’ve seen them talk about and i want them to see that their idea has been brought to life in a way that i hope does it justice, or because they asked to be tagged, and i want them to know that i’m thinking about them and their interests, or because we’re friends i miss seeing them around because they’re off doing their own thing and i love to see it but i miss being apart of their life.

and i will agree with you on that, i got used to my fics doing extremely well and getting these insane numbers that i’ve never had before, at least not on my original blog, that when i saw my recent fics at the time not doing the same, it made me think that those works weren’t as good or well-written which led to me spiralling over my writing, because i want to put good writing out, i want to put out things people will enjoy because i love writing, it’s a hobby i’ve kept up with since i was thirteen, but because i’ve been doing it so long, i’ve grown far too critical of it, other people’s validation either help solidify that it’s a good piece or it helps me push away the idea that it’s not as bad as i think it is. i know i’m not famous, i have never claimed to be famous. i get so sensitive over my writing that i take someone not liking what i write, as them not liking me because i view my writing almost as an extension of myself, and i want people to like me because i like making friends and having a bunch of friends, it’s not because i want to be known, i don’t care about being known, i care about having friends and making those connections and bonds with people because i’ve always been someone that enjoys having a huge group of friends, it makes me feel a lot less lonely because when i’m not on social media, at home, i’m completely alone and closed off because all of my irl friends have moved away and i don’t have a good relationship with any of my family.

i don’t think the world revolves around me, i never have. it’s not about me wanting to be known or famous or well-loved for my writing, it’s about me trying to have or find that bond and connection that i’ve only once in my life before i found out what that person had been doing to me and her other friends behind our backs. the cold demeanour is me protecting myself from being hurt, because i’ve been on the internet for a long time, i’ve been hurt by people i held close to me for whatever reason because there are people who move weirdly and me being naive at a young age. i can be apprehensive towards people i don’t know because i don’t always know how to handle someone actually wanting to get to know me without me approaching them first. and i do interact with people, i haven’t checked thing i’ve been tagged in recently because i haven’t had enough of an attention span or the time to actually go through my mentions, but i do go back when i finally get the time to myself to just sit and go through all my mentions or things i’ve been sent and reply to them, on top of me not having notifications on for this app because no matter what i do, they break my dnd settings and multiple others and a lot of my notifications being broken. and the fact that my asks are a mess because there’s requests from the beginning of this blog that i was never able to write that i don’t have the heart to delete because i hope that one day i can do them justice, or asks i’ve forgotten to reply to because my life out of social media gets so hectic and insane that i can only focus on one thing at a time, but it’s on me for not going back to them.

in conclusion, i know there’s shit i need to work on, i’ve been telling myself that, and i know that i’m not portraying myself the way i want to be seen. i fully get what you’re saying now that i’ve had time to think about what you’ve said and really think about my actions as of the last couple months, and i regret that i’ve made you dislike me and my recent actions because i’ve never meant to come across as someone who is so self involved, i tend to become impulsive and say whatever when i’m upset about something, i need to work on not reacting so quickly or viciously. i promise that i do appreciate every like, note, comment, dm, reblog, everything i get, i have just never been good at expressing my gratitude, especially with growing up in a house that uses insults and damn near verbal abuse disguised as tough love to show and express gratitude, i’m working on expressing my appreciation for everything in my life, but i psyche myself out and draft everything when i write up these thank you posts because there’s not enough words to show how thankful i am that people took a liking to something i started to keep my hobby and love for writing going.

it’s something i can’t even wrap my head around sometimes, because it’s surreal and some days i think that i’m going to wake up to it all being a massive joke on me. the person i’ve been and acted like in the last couple months is not someone i’m proud of being, i became someone very centred on numbers and how much people like me, and it stems from my problems with being the oldest and never having that support or appreciation in my home life that it’s mow manifested into everything else i do. i know that i have these unresolved issues and i’ve been trying hard to fix them with the knowledge i have but i’m not a professional and i can’t fix this shit wrong with me until i get to therapy but living in a house where i’m really not allowed to leave because everyone is so dependent on me and that doesn’t believe in therapy, it’s hard, and i see how badly these things are affecting everything i do and it makes me sick to know that i’m not being the friend i started out as to so many people, because they don’t deserve that shit.

what you expressed and have said is seen and heard, and i know that really, it boils down to me being so involved in my head and my thoughts, that i block out those around me and their feelings, meaning it comes down to me being ignorant, and it really is without me meaning to, and this truly and wholeheartedly, is of no one’s fault but my own. and i know that no one else is to blame, no else has ever been to blame, i was so scared to acknowledge what i was doing wrong because it meant having to take a deeper look within myself to see where it’s all coming from and that was something i wasn’t ready to do because i was dead set on making it appear like i was unaffected and unbothered due to expressing emotions being something i’ve never been the best at, especially since i’ve grown into the habit of ignoring everything. and i want to do better, i always have, i’ve just never known where to start and not knowing what to do to start fixing something overwhelms me and i just shut down. but i’m hoping that me acknowledging my faults as a person and as a friend, whether as a current or as a past friend, is a good or relatively decent starting point, and that i can figure out where to go from here. because i hate that i’ve hurt people and have made them feel unappreciated and like they’re only a rung on the ladder in my life, because i have never viewed any of my friends that way, but i know that my actions have made it seem that way, and again that’s purely because of my own ignorance.

i take full responsibility for everything you’ve said because there is truth to a lot of what you’ve said, and i see it now that i’ve taken the time to think about how i’ve put myself out there and how i’ve acted, but i hope that it’s clear that those things were never malicious or done with full intent of hurting or using somebody. i hope that there is a way for me to undo what i’ve done. and i apologize for all of it, and i will make up for it, if given the opportunity or not.

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spirkkock · 1 month ago

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there is something horrible about the sheer amount of times I am asked for money for people, and what it means about this world.

I'm not angry at people who are DMing me asking for money, nor am I angry that a homeless man asked me for money today while I was in the laundromat. I've seen the horrific conditions that exist on the streets in my city, of people with sores of rotting flesh because of tranq, people so grimy that all of their clothes and skin become grey, and people bleeding profusely all over the seats of the subway and I can't look at because I'll cry or faint.

The people of my city desperately need help - they're living in conditions worse than hell. The people who are in my DMs are in conditions worse than hell.

And I'm so fucking angry, because I have to donate to these campaigns, and I have to root around in my bag for change, meanwhile MY FUCKING MONEY is being systematically taken out of my paycheck against my will to produce these very conditions.

There's just something absolutely fucking sick about the government producing this system, only then for me, and for everyone else who lives here, to bear the responsibility of trying to help people with whatever meager money we have. Because government officials certainly aren't experiencing it. Biden and Kamala aren't staring at the flood of DMs of mothers and fathers begging for money to escape a genocide, they're not holding back tears on the subway as someone shits themselves because the only food they have access to is rotting in a dumpster.

It's fucking sick and disgraceful and I can't fucking stand it and I hope these politicians rot in hell, and I think if there is any justice in the world they fucking will.

#cw: gore

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ze-lla · 6 months ago

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Trigger warnings: mentions of predatory behavior and mentions of self harm

(And kind of a vent? More of a rant tho.)

I can’t believe I have to post this but apparently I do.

I AM A FUCKING MINOR.

I’m sick and TIRED of seeing predators dming me and flirting with me in my dms even AFTER I say I’m a fucking minor.

IVE STATED THAT I AM A MINOR MANY TIMES ON MY PAGE. I do NOT feel comfortable with people over the ages of 18 dming me shit.

I get it, my photos may look like it’s for nsfw shit but it’s NOT. I post what I post because I fucking love my scars, and I like communicating with people that are similar to me and struggle with the same things I do. which is why I post my scars.

My page is NOT for fucking predators.

I WILL NOT HAVE ANY ILLEGAL RELATIONSHIPS. I DON’T FEEL COMFORTABLE WITH IT.

Yes, I’m a femboy, I like dressing up feminine which is why I use the fucking term, that doesn’t automatically make what I dress or post sexual.

I’m a TEENAGER, I will wear the shit you see in my posts, it isn’t something to sexualize.

If you want to interpret my posts as sexual fine, whatever, I can’t stop you but PLEASE do NOT comment, reblog or dm me making it sexual when it is NOT the intentions.

I’m not a fucking idiot when it comes to predatory behavior, I can tell when you are a fucking predictor or not.

So don’t call me a “baby boy” or any sort of pet name even AFTER I said I’m a minor.

Go ahead and say it’s “my fault” for the pictures I post. Which let alone is a bullshit statement because I can’t control other peoples actions when THEY can, ESPECIALLY when it’s an adult.

If you are over 18 and like my photos you are more than welcome to like it but do NOT dm me or openly sexualize my photos.

I. AM. A. MINOR.

(And no this doesn’t affect me being pro-para.)

#self h@rm #paraphiles please interact #paraphilia #pro paraphile #pro para #femboy #rant #slight vent

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lunarmourning · 5 months ago

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Ok hi i have just one quick thing to ask. Can you explain the times where you've gone into servers and gcs and told greg you were mad at her and then when asked why you didn't tell it???

hi I don't usually like to answer these on my Tumblr especially since the situation has so much more than I could ever explain from an ask (when I say every situation I've been accused of has two sides, I mean it! I know for a fact that a lot of the stories people heard are lacking so much context) and I am really not comfortable airing trauma I haven't fully revovered from on Tumblr but I will answer this one. If I'm assuming what you're referring to right (if I'm not, don't be afraid to shoot another ask! i haven't gotten a lot of explanation of what I did wrong from. anybody. Also I am in no way uncomfortable with someone reaching out to me through dms, I would not be mad at anyone who got wrapped up in this situation for wanting to talk. Even Greg, I promise I would be comfortable with dming with her about if asked). (warning this is gonna be rambley, I just woke up)

I assume this would be when I would talk in a gc about my feelings in the relationship. I would like to explain that the only times I've talked about Greg in a gc were when I was mid breakdown or meltdown (often triggered by Greg doing or saying something triggering and then just. leaving me alone. which, happened several times.). Also, I would never talk with anyone that I knew Greg was friends with. I didn't feel like my breakdown gave me the right to ruin anyones relationship or perception on it. Which is, genuinely, the only reason I never came to anyone from the sunshine cult for support about her in my relationship because of how. many toxic that had been done to me in the relationship (which is the reason I eventually broke up with her after months of consideration, and the reason I blocked her. I felt sick talking to it and kept getting flashbacks. just generally felt uncomfortable and decided the best thing would to put distance. I in no way meant to hurt her through this). So, I talked with friends she didn't know very well (like Pip! hi Pip thank you for being supportive when my ex was being weird about my disability). I would like to repeat, I would only do this mid breakdowns.

About not communicating that I was mad. i literally. did. and tried. so many times. One of my earliest problems in the relationship is that we just didn't communicate at ALL. And Greg kept repeatedly hurting me because of it. It got to the point I was scared of her. I tried multiple times to talk about how the things she was doing was hurting me and every time I would be shut down and given excuses. Like that she didn't know how to communicate (I'm actively getting hurt here and I'm trying to express that. so we would end the conversation, I would have a breakdown alone in my room and she would go to bed. and it would happen again. I would like to say in a relationship where both people [likely,I am unsure if I have It fully yet. still researching] have bpd, that communicating is SO important and the lack of it is why we both feel we were hurt in the relationship. Greg never expressed when I was hurting her so I never knew. And I would like to say that it's valid and I'm so so sorry if I hurt you, but if you had told me I would've stopped in a fucking heartbeat. I told you when you hurt me, you just didn't care.). Or that she was dissociating (which is okay!!! often times I didn't even know and then I would be in "trouble" for trying to make her talk In that. Pls I promise if you had expressed that you would talk about this later and not just use it as an excuse for not talking about it ever I would be okay!!! it's just when every single time on four or more occasions, every time I was trying to express how I was getting hurt from toxic behavior. Also a lot of these dissociations wouldn't come until I tried to communicate so. hm. and this happened every time). So after repeated times (throughout MONTHS) communicating things that she would do over and over again, I kinda. gave up. If I ever told her I was mad and didn't explain, I'm so sorry and looking back that was wrong of me to do. but. I did. i did tell her. and after getting yelled at and ignored for hours to days on end for simply trying to fix something that had hurt me. i gave up. Can you blame me for making a stupid decision with someone who would never listen?

Greg at some point also sent screenshots of me trying to communicate for the final time before I gave up to people without my permission. My friend, who actually talked to me about my side of the situation unlike everyone else, sent me what Greg sent. And I was not surprised to see how much of that conversation was cropped out. A lot of the stories being told about me are half-truths, with things left unsaid to make me seem like a bad person.

(this situation also has a lot more behind it so please don't take this statement as all of it. Both this singular accusation and everything else has SO much context. This is simply me trying to explain one or two situations. Like I said, if anyone has any questions about another situation don't be afraid to reach out. I would be happy to talk to anyone who was willing to listen.)

#theres so much context.pls #i tried to fit as much as i could on here but theres moee

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astrobei · 2 years ago

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The end of the year is near. Give a shout-out to your favorite mutuals and tag them to spread love before the year ends! (from: a secret anon)

ohhhh my god ok ok i wish i could tag every single person i am technically mutuals with because i adore every single one of you and your blogs so much !! unfortunately if i did that you’d probably be here scrolling through this post well into the new year, so. this is by no means an exhaustive list!!

@elekinetic ELLA !! you were one of the first blogs i ever followed on st tumblr when i joined and i immediately. IMMEDIATELY. fell so in love with your scripts and your writing! you so are so insanely talented and such a backbone of byler tumblr and i can’t believe we get all of ur content for free. for FREE!! and not only are u insanely talented but somehow u are also so funny and one of the sweetest people i’ve ever and ur taste in everything from music to books is so immaculate. will never get over u dming me just to scream at me ABOUT me which seriously makes my day every time it happens and i’ll never EVER get sick of talking to you! ella i love you so much and i’m so glad we started talking this year!! i hope 2022 has nothing but the best of the best in store for you <3

abby @strangeswift HELLO ! every time i see ur url in my notifs i visibly light up i stg you are so precious to me <3 ur love for not all the prayers is singlehandedly sustaining me, and i’m so touched that long car rides have unofficially been dedicated to reading my fics. you are such a breath of fresh air and getting an ask from you is always the highlight of my day. you make me laugh you make me smile like an idiot at the tumblr app on my phone you are just so!!! PRECIOUS 2 ME!! i love your blog so much and i can’t wait to bother u so much in the new year !!

sierra aka THE @finalgirlbyers aka THE byler blog of all time !! sierra there’s just something in ur posts that’s like straight crack i stg i just need more and more and more and more every time! in my mind u will always be sierra loveqbrl madcleradin finalgirlbyers ft that one period of 15 minutes where u had ur secret username that just so happened to coincide with me running my tumblr stats website thing and u being immortalized as that forever in my phone. because apparently i reblog from u more than anyone else which YEAH. AS I SHOULD. as everyone should!!! sierra u are so fucking funny and your urls are just one of those that are so comforting to see in my notifs. one day we will have an actual conversation because i am so bad at dms but i could try and make an exception for u <3 love u so much sierra love bbq i hope 2023 is so good to u !!

@toystoryfan HI TOY! u are so important to me i hope u know that omg u are so sweet and so uplifting and i can’t believe i wasn’t following u before but i love your blog so much ! u have such a comforting presence and i love reading through ur tags and every time i get an ask or a reply from you i get so excited! thank u for being such a positive shining force, with me and all of my mutuals too, it’s so so so appreciated <3 i adore you so much and i hope the new year has nothing but good things to offer u !!

@wibble-wobbegong hiiiii wibble ! i hope u know that every time i see ur blog i am just picking it up and holding it so carefully in my hands. i think i also followed u pretty early on into my tumblr adventures (or at least i saw ur url everywhere bc everyone i followed rb’d from u !) so in my head ur like. an og byler tumblr blog. u are so so sweet and i will never forget u referring to me (in the context of how intimidating i am) as “just some guy” because it’s SO TRUE!! i AM just some guy! anyways. just know that i adore you and your blog is so so incredibly precious to me ! love reading ur tags love reading ur posts u are so correct all the time and ur icon is. well. iconic. love u wibble i hope u get one million followers in 2023 bc u deserve it fr

last but certainly not least— irene aka THE @byeler hello !! i know we haven’t spoken one on one all that much and i’m terrible with responding to dms anyway but . ohhhh my god i have been a little obsessed with you ever since i got twitter sjdksjf in a very normal and sane way i promise ! irene you are so sweet and kind and supportive and so insanely down to earth for literally being THE beansie! i’m so in love with your writing and it’s no secret how much i yelled and screamed into the pillow when i read i’ll find myself in the moonlight 😭 had to sit down and just. Think. i just started heavy hopes and. god. GOD!! I LOVE IT SO MUCH. !!!!!! anyways i freak out a little every time i see ur name in the notifs but u are so lovely and approachable u make everyone feel so at ease and i treasure every interaction we have! thank u for ur mile long list of reddie fic recs, i’ve been making my way through them for the past week and ur taste in fics is just as incredible as ur writing <3 hope u have a wonderful new year irene i love u much !!

#/ask #ok if we are mutuals know that i love u #i just.#have been typing for 40 minutes and i need to move on before this post takes u all of 2023 to scroll through #god #so full of love today #kissing each of u on the head #so tenderly

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iknowyouliedbane · 2 years ago

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The Story & Legend of Lord Banegrivm aka Rogueknight

Banegrivm's Discord is Banegrivm#3328 or banegrivm#3328

The Fist is his guild.Say you met him on WOW Emerald Dreams, say you noticed his lovely his armour or something. This bloke won't know what hit em.

Here kitty kitty Pumpkin where are you little mans...I heard him say in over voice chat once a long time ago. Must have cats working his magic for him.

He has been attacking me through the ether. Nothing he has stated online or otherwise, has been made a secret. He habitually blasts his personal business in chat on Emerald Dreams on a regular basis, if you are in his guild. Which I am. I am right here within his ranks. Ive seen people come, ive seen people go. Ive heard about all the victims he ruined mentally/emotionally/ etc and never gets justice served to him for his crimes. He thinks he is s leader, but he is more like the police. He is not good at being the leader is this guild, and here on discord, I have seen it all.

He vapes weed out the side dorr of his place in Mechanicsburg, PA, upper floor, he is behind 2 security doors. He sleeps during the day like a vampire. I know this because ive been stalking him for years. Im in Wisconsin but sometimes go to Pennsylvania for skiing at the family cabin, so yeah I made a pass to verify that he lives there, even though way out the way! But anyways, just to see if what I found lonline as public information, was true, which he does live there. But I dont care, I just forgot the address and moved on, but I know that he is in hiding and has no income, makes everyone here in the guild pay his way, pay for the game subscription, his stuff is all charity for him, he is not on disablility not going there, but anyways he has no income becasue he begs ofr help from me and others, and im sick of it. Now that I know that truth, i feel bad for him. Kind of, but not really, he could get a job and leave his abusvie mom who looks over his shoulder the whole time, he even made her a moderator and its creepy, sometimes I think he is living vicariously through her, like she isnt doing it, she isnt emailing harrassing emails to his rejectors, (all me again), fake accounts) and I think he is living in insanity. He doesnt have an identity anymore, he lost that when he 'lost face" with society, and now an outcast, so he lives in issolation. He dreams of taking us all to court, he said to us, that all the people who stalked him online should pay, yet, he was the only one abusing anyone. Im wise enough to know that, yet here I am, a part of his dark sick twisted circus. He has no idea he added me as a member to The Fist, and then he met Vinnchzzk or " whoever the hell that is".., after "she" left the guild I realized he had no idea that "she" was a HE. He thinks Vinn is the first version of "her" he has met. Vinn is a guy!!!!! Its a big fat joke on him!!!!! He fell for it, she isnt even a real person. April had the charactor online from a guild in another state, and her photos were used but its not actually her, she has nothing to do with the discord, guild, cuild chat, WOW, EverQuest, etc etc etc. She only was in a couple of our D&D sessions, and that whole youtube thing went nowhere fast, The Dept of Dread on youtube playing a Ravenloft campaign in 2021ish?)

He thinks he met the real girl on social media, but "she" met him from EverQuest, a long ass time ago children. Im in my 40s, so that is telling you something, I was just a kid, Ive known his ways for years now. Banegrivm, whoever this charctor is, also goes by Reverend Bob on the Ravenloft game, he narrates and does a fine job and everything, but make another person do the DMing, and he takes all the credit, we are all talking about that, and I have a lot of respect for Bane but I wont say that everything he has done is okay, its just not cool to be honest. I wont usehis real name here so i can avoid defamtion lawsuit, he is waiting for someone to do so. But I can vent myself about a fictional charactor, from a guild that im a part of, but have had not official introduction to any of these people if known for 20 years, im not even sure they are who they are anymore.

I met him online years ago, before WOW. Ive been following this for years, and he will keep yelling at him mom and threatening her if she doesnt cast spells on the women who reject him online. I think he gives her sexual favors to read tarot and give him answers. I dont actually know but that is what another tarot reader told me about them. But I have made fake accounts for him to fall victim too, like the hunter becomes the hunted, he fell victim to my collosal web, spun with love and hate, just for him. Nothing more powerful can come about than that which comes from the heart, and the heart of an earth angel is what he tried to crush with his corrupted roots of rotting hatred and scorn. He is the bane to everything that could be magical or beautiful, or innocent. He is a corruption that is is hiding with his mother, the author of the book the Throne of Piddle, he proclaimed this. Ever since the Circle of Corriander or whatever the fuck it was called, he has made me SICK.

There is an existing post from someone who knew him from the same place and they mentioned barfing or something, so < im not alone. Plus I have heard and seen the screenshots of countless professions of love then turn around and hex the same person to dust. He is a real warlock. He attacks you with his mind and searches you with the email you use for things, dud. He is not that smart. He thinks he duped his victims and the protectors of his victims, by lying about someone making a title of Banegrivm and posing as him doing illegal shit then saying Oh! That wasnt me - they made a fake handle or whatever he would say with his lack of tact. I have nothing against him personally but the fact that he constantly lies in his various online functions pisses me off to no end. Yeah, he definitely was guilty of that long convo witht he person posing as a teen, even though he fell for that bait...He tried to say online that he was innocent and has a problem even being around children because he is afraid of being a monster in other people's eyes, avoiding judgement either way if he is guilty of child-grooming or not, he is still in hiding and hiding his drug habit from his own mother, she is his narcissistic supply, and between her and his grandmother who he claimed raised him, he publically says he is special, and this si how these women raised him to think of himself, as better than other, since his father and soon thereafter stepfather abandoned his mother, (gee I wonder why that would be, maybe she was crazy and couldnt get away from her mother, generations of insanity and narcissism)

Im the kind that keeps freaks monsters and the like up on my wall. Sure I had to add him, to get in his circle, but its all part of the hunt. The hunt for the truth.

So yeah its not great looking for whoever wants to judge me go ahead but i know that as long as he keeps looking up these tumblr pages with his name, he will know that we know ;)

#banegrivm #mutiny #whodoyouthinkyouare #kukanisback #hethinksimafemale #eyespycyclops

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f4iry-bell · 3 months ago

Text

CANCELLED (smau)

pairing: grayson hawthorne x lyra kane

summary: lyra goes viral after posting a video calling out tobias hawthorne and his ways, also she mentions his grandsons which caught the attention of grayson hawthorne.

tagging: @unnoodles @nqds @alwaysthefangirl @clarissaweasley-10 @benny1989fredd @imaseabear @never-enough-novels @elysianwayy77 @whatsamongus @sheisntyou

warning: non canonical events??? cursing

a/n: GET HIM LYRA!!!

smau masterlist , masterlist

posted on @lyrakane 's account and story.

♥ 86k likes

lyrakane: tobias is NOT a good man and his grandons aren't worth hyping either. you guys need to stop ass licking those guys just because they're attractive. link to janeson hawthorne's arrests. grayson hawthorne looks like a spitting image of his grandfather and many people have claimed that he's rude asf to his employees. also, he covers up jameson 's arrests as well. my friend worked with their publist, follow for more tea!!!

9,598 comments

username: wait, no grayson is rude irl???

user1: apparently, I've heard a lot of people say that.

username: i mean he LOOKS rude but i always thought he's nicest because he always get bullied by jameson on the internet but never bullied back, yk???

username2: omg no way knew it. FINALLY THEY'RE GETTING CANCELLED, ESPECIALLY GR@YS0N

user3537: why jameson getting arrested for running around shirtless and drunk is so hot—

grayson's message

DMING LYRA:

g.h: this is grayson hawthorne, i am texting you to kindly ask you to take your video down. thank you.

l.k: kindly??? you????

g.h: if you can't tell, people spread lies.

l.k: the 'people' was my FRIEND, i trust what she says.

g.h: you don't even know me, neither does she. with one or two encounters you cannot judge someone and go on social media to ruin their image.

l.k: first of all it's a HE. second of all im ruining anything that is NOT true.

g.h: how much do you want?

l.k: excuse me?

g.h: money. how much? you probably posted that to gain money and interactions.

l.k: and you said you're not rude? don't assume shit, asshole. i posted because I'm sick of you and your brothers getting away with things. you're done.

lyrakane blocked graysonhawthrone.

#the inheritance games #grayson hawthorne #lyra kane #grayson x lyra #the brothers hawthorne #jameson hawthorne #the hawthorne brothers #xander hawthorne #avery kylie grambs #avery grambs #nash hawthorne #the grandest game

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eb3yr · 7 months ago

Note

Hello, I am from (Rafah) in the refugee camp. I have left my parents at home, my younger siblings have been relying on me for their education, due to the family being economically poor, I took the responsibility of going to do domestic work. in 2017 in the (Gaza) Strip. In the family I was working for, everything was destroyed after riots broke out, the house was bombed, and unexpected deaths occurred frequently. And that's when we ran to Rafah. I am facing the challenge of leaving there (Rafah) because my mother is sick, she has 3C colon cancer, and my father has type 2 diabetes. I am their biggest support, the cost of leaving (Rafah) is $5000 and those it's too much money, I can't afford it right now. Please, I am at your feet, I am asking for your help so I can get home. Thank you🙏 DONATE AND SHARE

Thanks for DMing me like the other twenty scammers, so I can check your pinned scam post begging for donations. FYI, I just sent an ask to every person who's ever reblogged your posts telling them this message:

"Hi, just wanted to let you know that the post asking for aid you reblogged from foggyblizzardharmony is a scam. The blog was made this month, reblogged some Palestine-related posts and immediately started begging for aid. These kinds of scam blogs are extremely common now and send out inbox spam, which is how I found it."

On top of reporting your blog and your posts. I do this to every scammer who messages me.

Get fucked, idiot. I hope people take notes and start to do the same.

#I am so incredibly sick of these scammers #get the fuck out of my DMs #free palestine

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scoobydoodean · 11 months ago

Note

I am reblogging this, and I want people to know when I do so, that for a long time, I have considered Bear a friend. He's been a follower of mine for a long time and actually has his own tag on my blog #thee number one benny stan to hold all of the lovely things he's sent to me over the last year when I started formally tagging things. I was tagged in and frequently reblogged his art over the last year, which I have always thought was lovely and unique (and have told him so).

Over the last year, I became increasingly aware that a lot of people do not know Bear as a person who occasionally pops into their inbox to spread love and positivity—which is what I have always known Bear for—as a sweet, lovely, creative person.

When the anon mail from some benny stans started happening, I did not believe that he would send people such terrible things. My experience with him had always been positive, and he came to me a few times when Courtney was getting anons he thought could be misconstrued as being from him (though no one, including me, ever implicated him in any way), and told me it wasn't him. I believed him. My way of making sense of the harassment Courtney was being sent that seemed so deeply connected to Benny and recent posts Bear had made (despite no one ever saying that) was that perhaps someone who disliked both of them was sending the messages, and then DM-ing both of them about it to stir up drama as some sick little game.

Courtney and I discussed this. Bear and I discussed this. I urged Bear to protect his mental health by not going to Courtney's blog to see messages that filled him with anxiety (and frustration over the lack of shared interest in Benny and deanbenny). It has been perpetually clear that despite being blocked, he often goes onto Courtney's blog and then gets upset about hate messages being sent to Courtney about Benny, and how Courtney responds to them. Courtney has never once named him in connection to any of these messages, and people sending Courtney ugly things about Benny OR about Bear is not Courtney's fault.

ETA:

Over the last few months, I have grown sadder and sadder as I faced more evidence (despite the fact that absolutely no one tried to prove it to me) that Bear is the one who sends a lot of the ugly messages Courtney has received (including suicide bait). I genuinely did not want to believe this was the case.

However, I have seen vagueposts that happened too close together, timestamped before Courtney receieved hate mail about Benny AND a few minutes after they responded to it. I've become aware of a lot of stories that have saddened me that show a particular pattern. I will leave most of those for other people to share or not share.

I also reached out to someone recently about negative experiences connected to Bear that I had heard about, and harassment that resulted from blocking him for some unpleasant behavior. I've been asked not to be too specific to protect their identity. I also want to add that Bear was a follower of theirs prior to this, and they'd had friendly interactions:

He came back after being blocked and harassed me from multiple accounts (one of them had anons that had been sent calling people racists. [I say] anons because the account was empty). The first one was an "apology"—typical, "I'm sorry that you felt bad, but I didn't do anything wrong". Other anons were hate mail, name calling, yada yada. [...] Note that since this started I thought it was best (from a cursory glance at his blog) that I never utter a word to him. well then I took some measures in hopes that would stop him without me having to contact him. He called me a racist and said that I used the term "harassment" to make him look like a thug, and then he started DMing my mutuals sending them [posts he made about me]. When people started unfollowing him, he deleted [everything he's said] [...] Then he made a post apologizing [...] to anyone but me. Days passed and he kept vagueing me, saying I was the worst person alive, love bombing and following MY mutuals and talking shit in DMs that I was racist and a terf [...] Basically, he's been playing the victim while implementing every single abusive tactic under the sun to the point that a couple of mutuals unfollowed me I think because of him? There's no way for me to know but they're mutuals now so I assume that was the cause. [...] He keeps stalking everyone I follow leaving comments, likes etc etc. I'm so tired 😩

Here, I would also like to cosign Courtney's warning on this. Do NOT harass anyone over this. Do NOT send anyone ugly messages. I will eat you alive.

I don't want to start drama and I don't expect you to respond to this but I think you deserve to know what's being said about you. tumblr. com/transfagbenny/738678589192552448/and-id-appreciate-if-we-stopped-using-the-terms

i actually am going to address this because this person has been lying about what's been going on for months and they've apparently been harassing other people for months if not years, so. it's time to put an end to this.

before i start though i want to make it abundantly clear that if you take this as an opportunity to do anything other than block this person, then you are trash. do not send him messages. do not tag him in things. do not harass him in any way. leave him alone. if you need to block, do so and then move on. hate mail and harassment is disgusting behavior and i don't want to be surrounded by anybody who engages in it. and if you do it on my behalf, i think you are worthless and i want nothing to do with you.

so, this is what happened: back in february of 2023, an anon asked me if i had any opinions that would get me canceled with the dean girlies. i replied, "oh now we’re talking!! hmmmm let’s see. i don’t care about benny at all. deanbenny does nothing for me. deanbenny is dust. it is dust. drowley rights forever" and i did not tag it because i'm not an asshole. bear then sent me a message that at the time i thought was funny/cute because his url reflected that he was obviously a huge benny fan. we had a very cordial exchange. everything was good. we chatted a little bit about how neat it would've been if benny had been played by a black actor and how the racism problem with gordon would've been fixed if gordon had been played by a white actor. not all of our conversation is visible anymore (and i also don't think all of it was on this post anyway) because i've since blocked him so his replies no longer show up on my posts. the point is: everything was fine. it was a good tumblr exchange. he continued to follow me. i did not follow him then or at any point.

the problem is that he kept coming onto my posts and into my inbox to try to make things about benny. that is not okay. i had already said that benny was a character (and deanbenny a ship) that i was not interested in. to me, this is an obvious boundary i've established that he repeatedly crossed. it's not an egregious violation, obviously. more than anything it's annoying. what he should've done, if benny was that important to him, was unfollow me and move on. but he didn't and i indulged him for awhile but at a certain point i thought, "okay maybe if i stop indulging him, he'll take the hint." so i stopped responding. he did not take the hint. he got worse and he even started commenting on things that he couldn't make about benny, just to willfully misinterpret things i said and taking them completely out of context. unfortunately, i don't have receipts for any of this because at the time i didn't know it was going to become an actual problem (however I have since learned that this is an established pattern of behavior he engages in, so you can probably find examples on other people's blogs).

it got so annoying, though, that i very carefully broached the subject in a private server with people i trusted. without naming any names or using any incriminating language (i.e. not specifically referencing benny), i basically said that there was someone being annoying about a specific character on my posts and i wasn't sure what to do about it. immediately, a handful of people replied with some variation of "the benny stan? he's been doing that to me too." i do have receipts of this (and an entire server to back me up) but i hope you can all understand why i'm not going to provide those or name names (or ask anyone to get involved publicly). the point is, it became apparent that i wasn't the only one and this was a pattern of behavior. i also learned during that conversation that bear has a history of harassing people and calling someone racist or a transphobe if they block him.

at that point, i decided not to rock the boat. i would just continue to ignore him and maybe he would get bored and move on. well that obviously didn't happen. he kept doing it and as a fun added bonus, he started to make vague posts about me. the thing is i don't actually care if he vagueblogs about me. it's his blog. he can do whatever he wants. it's none of my business. i mean i personally think he should've just unfollowed but, again, his blog, his choice. it is annoying that every single time he would do it, someone would send me a link or a screenshot of him doing it, but that's not really his fault. so, again, i just ignored it.

this is where we get to the incident in question. after a private discussion among a small group of friends, i posted this obviously joke poll at the insistence of @letterstothedevil, a tumblr user who has given me permission to include her in this.

the original message about the poll:

the permission:

now EYE think it's abundantly clear that the poll was a joke amongst friends, but maybe it wasn't, and i'm not going to fault anyone for not magically knowing that. i am, however, totally willing to fault someone for being a gigantic asshole. bear commented on the post and i, admittedly, gave a somewhat dismissive response because at that point i was so tired of him being willfully obtuse and twisting every little thing i said that i just didn't want to bother. he then went and made a series of not-at-all-vague posts calling me racist and claiming that i simply do not care about the racism in the show and it's obvious because i've never ever discussed it on my blog (which is a hilarious lie given that i'd specifically discussed it on my blog with him). at that point, there was no reason not to block him. he was already doing the thing that i didn't want to deal with. so i did. and i thought that would be the end of it.

again, i was wrong.

i then started to get anon messages daily about benny and deanbenny and how i'm racist for not liking benny, etc. this was harassment that EYE was on the receiving end of. nobody else was a victim of the messages i was being sent. they were sent to me and it is not my job to make sure other people are protected from the harassment that i am experiencing. i'm pointing this out for two reasons: 1. because i did try to protect bear from it for awhile anyway. i knew that people would assume it was him and at the time i was still giving him the benefit of the doubt, if for no other reason than the fact that i didn't think he could send me messages since i blocked him. and 2. because when i did finally start to respond to some of the messages, bear acted like he was somehow the victim in all of this (and continues to act that way to this day).

i don't know if bear had (or currently has) anything to do with any of the messages i get (which, thankfully, have slowed considerably). what i do know is that at no point during any of this happening did he stop looking at my blog and vagueblogging about me.

when i finally did answer a few of the messages, bear had a bit of a meltdown about it. i know this because he used a separate account that i hadn't know existed to message me and because he talked to one of my friends about it. (i'm not going to name that person but if they want to get involved publicly of their own accord, that's up to them lol). i'm also not going to share screenshots of what bear said to me because he explicitly asked me not to (it's also the reason i'm not sharing screenshots of the numerous receipts i have of the things he's said and lied about on his blog but, unless he's deleted any of them, you can go and find the posts yourselves.) what i am going to share is that in the message he sent to me, he flat out lied about his behavior. he told me he hadn't been vague-blogging about me, that he would never ever do that about anyone, and that he would certainly never harass someone (all things that i have receipts of him doing).

it took me awhile to respond to this message because i was still trying to be gracious about the whole situation. i recognize that he is much younger than i am and i think it's important for me, as a full blown adult, to take that into account. i had a private discussion with a few trusted friends about how to handle this because it was important to me to not let him off the hook for his behavior and for lying just because he's young. this is what i ended up saying:

his response was to double-down on his lies (while, hilariously, vague-blogging about me and the whole thing) and then go into victim mode about something so completely unrelated and far-fetched that i decided i simply wanted nothing to do with him ever. (this is when he asked me not to share screenshots, so i won't, but this is me saying that i have ALL of the receipts, bear, so if you continue to lie, you will not like what happens.) i blocked his alternate account and tried to ignore him.

the harassment continued. again, i have no idea if he was actually part of it. the vagueblogging continued. he started to do it to other people he associated with me. many of them blocked him because of his behavior. i continued to answer some of the hate i received, continued to ignore and/or block most of it. it got so bad that i was sent seizure bait on more than one occasion, one time bad enough that i actually ended up going to the ER. there are receipts of all of this, too. you can see on my blog the messages i've been sent. i think at one point i even shared a snapshot of what my inbox looked like. i've shared privately with friends (who can confirm if they want to, but no pressure) screenshots of the kinds of messages i get that i don't respond to. the point is, that for a period of months, i was relentlessly harassed. and at no point during this time did i say anything to or about bear (or anyone else). the most i've done is respond to messages that have been sent to me. i've largely sat quietly while this thing happened to me and bear continued to make posts about me and act like he is somehow a victim in this. he's assumed things about me and my identity. he's violated boundaries i've set. he will not let this go. and i'm not the only one he's doing it to.

i'm so fucking tired of it. leave me alone. leave my blog alone. leave my friends alone. leave any and all of the people who have blocked you for your own inappropriate and obnoxious behavior alone. that's it. that's the end. none of this would be happening if you would just respect other people's boundaries. i don't want you on my blog. i do not want to interact with you. i don't want anything to do with you. that's it. the end.

#thee number one benny stan

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apple-but-sour · 2 years ago

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Hi apple I’m not a follower of urs but GOD that post of yours is exactly what I’ve been saying for ages. On anon so I don’t get swarmed but ohhh my god as a former inniter (healed-ish❤️) c inniters can be some of the most repugnant people fucking ever. A lot of them are downright cruel and openly post death threats. Last year, when Dream apologists were getting gore and death threats sent to them. I ended up dming a few to check in and all of them were super kind despite the fact I was an inniter and they were, well, getting death threats. I was vagued for saying “maybe don’t send death threats, porn, or gore to a population of largely minors that’s inappropriate”. They cannibalize their own community because they’re so rabidly hostile to each other. It’s sick and has driven me away from the fan base of the character.

Not to mention looking for MCYT fics at all is hell on earth. Even IF you filter the tommy tag.

Ah I'm sorry to hear that. To be honest y'know I try to be #notallcinniters but many recent events combined made me not trust that side of the fanbase at all.

And it sucks that the fanbase around c!Tommy is full of such toxicity coz, even though I myself am not a fan of the character, it upsets me to see some c!Tommy fans in Dreblr lament over the fact that it's hard to find fellow enjoyers they can interact with. And I've seen a lot of people express that their dislike of the character is at least somewhat influenced by the way some of his fans act.

I dunno what else to say, it just all sucks. I'm sorry you had to deal with all that anon. Wish this fandom was kinder.

#apple answers #anon #discourse

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adel-memes · 3 years ago

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Honestly, didn't think I would be back here talking to you about it but. I guess it's time for context since you didn't bring it up, Nicole @juxuluxe (correct me* if you want to be referred with another name. I may be against you but I don't want to disrespect you.)

Of course, everyone who sees this post. Proceed with caution if you are triggered by the following:

Abuse. Guiltrip. Trauma. Emotional abuse. Self harm threats. And anything of that nature.

Because It's time for my side of the story. The one where I purposefully kept hiding cause it's ugly and tiring. Not just because I wanted to heal but also because you promised and said you will get better. You are talking about others treatment towards you but you didn't give context so people who don't know about the issue will not be able to judge fairly.

First of all, I'm not here for fueling this. I just want to give context of things you didn't bring up or even address with details, but like you, I don't have a lot of proof because I deleted my accounts. Why? Because I wanted to avoid you, ironic but it's true. Majority of my reasons to creating new discord and tumblr accounts is to just avoid you. So yeah, same mistake unfornately. Still it's only fair if I say my side if you get to talk about yours. It's only fair.

Also I'm trying to say this as gently as possible but also as straightforwardly as possible. I'm tired of this happening every few months and there isn't enough context and I have keep blocking over and over but this time I'll unblock to talk to you directly and openly.

So listen to me after all these years. Nicole, may I remind you of what you did? You may not remember me or shut these memories out, yet but here's something that might remind you. The name Ash? Yeah exactly.

You claim allegedly Kaenith harassed you but as far as I can see from the whole documents and the asks is, all they did was keep track of every single time you wished death for them or approached them without their consent. Honestly their actions are logical if you think of how serious it can get when you see person wishing to harm you multiple times or disrespecting your boundaries. Kaenith repeatedly told you to leave them alone and even when you wanted forgiveness and sought it out they still wished you to grow just to stay away from them???

Now I'm not here to talk about that. But I want you to hear me out and explain why you think you're the one demonized and isolated when you brought it upon yourself with your abusive behavior. Do not excuse it with mental illness. Just because you have issues doesn't mean you shouldn't take accountability. We all know this. But of course, taking accountability doesn't mean everything will be okay. Some things just better be acknowledged that they will never be fixed.

And I am saying this as someone who is in the same shoes. I am also mentally ill. I was also a minor at the time. YOU are older than me in fact. Yet for some reason, I had to act like the therapist despite being younger one who actually didn't know how to tackle these things.

I'm all for forgiveness and carrying on. I will say it from now so you don't claim like I'm purposefully hiding some facts or whatever. I will state everything I can remember.

I do remember you dming me and telling me who you are when I accidentally liked some of your posts in the past and I will be honest. I appreciate the fact you did come clean and say "hey it's me nicole" when I didn't know it's your account and we managed to settle it on a clean note. I acknowledge and respect that.

But I will address that it's getting real exhausting to see this start up every few months. It's not even supposed to be called drama but I'm tired. Honestly just typing this is bringing up bad feelings and sickness. I wanted for it to end yet it still comes up over and over and over with more out of context claims.

So let's back track. I remember befriending you and few others, out of respect I won't mention their names. But hey I was excited, I wanted some friends to talk about FS with me.

Of course at the time, the whole anti thing went off, some people left the fandom even, and I don't want to talk about it I didn't even do anything and just observed from the side and whatever. But our friends, they were antis of the whole shipping thing and you wanted their approval and that started your whole agenda against the members of this fandom who happen to be on the shipping side. I remember you talking about being an anti and disliking the whole thing. I do know you did it for them because I remember seeing you post vent posts about it when we were friends. But it didn't get you the approval you wanted and you were upset by that.

Long story short because I don't want to disrespect them and add them into this if they don't want to. It continued until they blocked you. They all blocked you. Except for me who was terrified you will die if I left as well.

Because of this I got the unfortunate stick of dealing with your abuse first hand. Let me say this briefly and it might make sense why you got blocked or avoided by people but I'll be honest. You were controlling, possessive, had a jealousy problem, and anger issues. Not only that but you would also lovebomb people as if that makes everything great and okay.

It didn't. It only blinded me to think I was wrong and doubt myself. I had to stay stuck going "what if I'm wrong. Look at this good supportive space.." as if that supportive environment wasn't just me playing therapist OR act as just some toy for you to treat depending on your mood. Happy? All is well except for eggshells I had to avoid so I don't ruin your mood. Anything else? Lashing out or venting or blaming or so on.

To remind you, I will say what happened in our so called friendship. If I responded late, you will ghost me and talk shit on tumblr. I used to stay up till 4 am to talk you out of suicide knowing I will wake up at 7 or 6. I had to deal with falling asleep in classes and getting yelled at for not taking school seriously because I was worried you will die. No one knew I was stuck trying to act like a hero and save you while growing distant with everyone around me because I had to spend all my time with you or be anxiously waiting for you. I couldn't even get enough time to eat because I was scared you would think I'm ignoring you.

It didn't end there. Remember your romantic advances? Despite me repeatedly saying no? I'm, to this day, grateful for not knowing you irl because if you couldn't handle me saying no in texts and had breakdowns that were filled with guilttrips, then I don't know what would have happened if it was in real life. I repeatedly told you I'm on the ace spectrum (demisexual at the time!) and not interested and I repeatedly told you I will always care and love as friends but it wasn't enough and you would claim you're so unlovable that you want to die. Putting me on the spot to think of whether I should pursue such a relationship with you or not. I was terrified yet I still thought we were friends.

I wanted to help you. But you were actively traumatizing me and the abuse still hurts to this day. I had to deal with being terrified of notifications and getting sick because I didn't answer quick enough. Because I was afraid loved ones will die because I didn't answer quickly.

Because that's what you did. I literally once slept in. For few minutes. I woke up late. And saw our dms had many notifications where you were asking where I was and that you will die and proceeded to IGNORE me when I tried to talk and reach out to explain myself on discord AND tumblr. I wanted to explain myself FOR SLEEPING IN?????? You went to vent on tumblr about saying I was ignoring you and you want to die??? While not listening my attempts to tell you it's a misunderstanding???? Please think of how it felt being just a child thinking their friend will die and it's all because they slept? Do you know how that messes up a person?

There's so much more I can say. But I don't want to bring up the past, I had to right now but this is the truth. The only reason I'm talking is because I want to give context of how you were in the past and why people avoid you. Like why are you talking about if Kaenith is keeping tabs on you who wished for them to die??? It doesn't even matter how old you were, you never wish death for someone??????? Especially someone who didn't even talk to you or do anything???? Enough is enough? You were already showing abusive behavior and then those threats? It's obviously concerning and stressful!

Give the whole context and understand that the reason people avoid you isn't because they demonized you it's because you had some unhealthy abusive behavior that needed to be checked. It wasn't because people want you to feel excluded, it was out of safety. I'm sorry this happened and I'm sorry it's continuing to stress you out and I'm only here to give context. I don't want you to get hurt and honestly I don't like posting this but I feel more safe with being in public than staying behind closed doors because I don't want to be alone with you. Even if I want you to be okay, I'm still hurt by you. Even if we talked it out and I forgave you, it still hurts.

The solution is in your hands. It's to leave this fandom or keep it private with your friends if you don't want someone to keep tabs on you. Just understand, you were abusive and that's why people are wary of you. I hope you're better now or working on it. I admit I didn't expect to talk to you again but I want you to understand what you did and how some people just can't forgive. It's traumatizing. So, just. Stop. It's hurting you and causing more anxiety. Let it rest, you don't have to be in this fandom or anything. As advice from me to you, please just go into another fandom or don't even interact with this fandom just talk about FS with your circle of friends. Create a new account and go into another fandom where no one will keep tabs on you and you can rest assured. Let's just end this and stop bringing it up, it only hurts all of us especially you.

The reason I'm addressing this is to talk about the truth, I wouldn't bring past stuff with someone I forgiven but the reason I am this time is because I want to give context since you didn't mention your actions in the post. Even if you did before, you have to at least make it fair and bring some context to what happened.

I know abuse cycles happen. I know some of your private life. I know of these things. Honestly I wish it didn't happen but it still did. I know you had a rough life and it explains your actions in the past, but it doesn't excuse it unfortunately. It's why people who knew your past in this fandom avoid you. I hate holding someone to their past but it is understandable why some do.

I came to speak of my side and of course, I don't know everything about everyone else in this. I just wanted to give my side. The people reading this are free to decide whether to believe me or not. I just hope you know that I hate saying lies about people, I always love hearing both sides of the story and I never ever want to be unfair. The strangers who see this post and don't know me, you can ask the people around me. Let them tell you if I'm a fair person or not. I never want any harm inflicted on anyone. I get tired and angry and sad. But my main goal is to advise and to explain.

Lastly, I hope you do stay safe and get better. I still go through various emotions thinking of you, all ranging from anger to sadness to hurt, but at the end of the day. I hope you do get better. I'm sorry it's lengthy but I needed to give context from someone who isn't you or kaenith.

Until then, take care everyone and I will try to answer questions if necessary but only for a little while. Also if you're not part of this and didn't talk to Nicole or so, don't get involved or say anything about them(? Her? Idk. Again, correct me if I'm wrong.) Fellas. I don't want any anons that are on either side of the issue attacking each other. Do it anywhere else this post is only to give context. This whole thing still makes me sick but I didn't like how there wasn't any context and it just dropped in the fs tag.

#four swords #also correct me on pronouns or so idk but i just wanted to respectfully talk about this #excuse if theres typos im just so tired and i want to help out but idk what to do and hhhh #ok got your @ this time I didnt know how to spell it but here you go!

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fire-atwill · 2 years ago

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Okay I’m watching Exandria Unlimited: Calamity so prepare to be sick of me! Imma tag spoilers and shouldn’t be too annoying cause ya boy is Not Commenting on everything cause these episodes are Long)

Im 2 hours into the first episode, I love them all. Brennan is incredible I love his style. I love how each of them have their own strengths, I’ve always found Matt’s knowledge of lore and his ability to connect the story in a fascinating way to be my favourite part about his DMing. For Aabria i think she does an incredible job with NPC’s I never really forget that they’re there which is cool. I haven’t actually seen much of her Critical Role DMing but I watched Misfits and Magic and her NPC’s are amazing I adore them.

Brennan brings such magic to his descriptions tho it’s incredible. He’s always tying it back to the characters themselves, allows so much freedom and yet fucks with everyone so much. He feels like a benevolent trickster god. Like if Artagan was real.

Moving on to the characters themselves!!!!! Yes my loves this will be a long post. So far I have only watched their introductions so my opinions may change

Zerxus - this man be ballsy as fuck. Yall see the fucking a weird giant being of light and tell them to stop what they’re doing??? That’s bigger than the being who’s HAND YOU ARE STANDING ON. His conversation with Elias hurt a little bit. Im sure nothing will go wrong there

Loquatius - this is just Sam. Iconic, amazing, an attention whore. The ABC’s of Sam (for legal reasons this is a joke). In all seriousness I think he genuinely does love Laerryn and it’s just not a compatible relationship anymore.

Laerryn - Im already in love. Can we take a second to appreciate Aabria absolutely freaking out over everything going on and the moment her character is introduced she goes full on role play moment Im in love!! Idk I just kinda….resonate with her a bit? Always looking for the next thing to go wrong, disliking small talk, ya know the works. Obviously I’m not gonna destroy a bunch of shit due to my hubris but that might just be because I don’t have magic soooooo

Nydas - he reminds me of Fabian so much I adore him. Morals? Who’s she? Nah I adore him. I do think he genuinely cares about people but cares more about himself and his wealth. Who knows maybe that’ll be part of his character development. I’m sure nothing will go wrong in the meantime :)

Cerrit - now y’all know I adore Travis. Cerrit is so COOL. Idk, I love the idea of someone who doesn’t have magic being in a party filled with people with magic it just amuses me. I’m very excited to see where this goes also seems like we’re getting a murder mystery?? And by murder I mean consumed by an entity of unknown origin???? Loving it

Patia - again I’m in love. Marisha Ray is incredible and The Range??????? Keyleth the most awkward motherfucker to ever exist and then Patia a stone cold ice Queen. Fuck the defrosting ice Queen trope if she burns the world down out of sheer disregard I would still kneel before her because I love her. Yes thank you I am in love with Marisha Ray and no I will not apologise

This was longer than I thought it was going to be.

#exu: calamity spoilers #exu: calamity #actually having so much fun

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