#I always wonder what their relationship could’ve been if the writers actually cared about them

[mickeym4ndy]

insp

[skhardwarevers1]

tell me about the long lost 313 arc 👁👁

okay okay so at first glance my plans seem kinda simple yknow? Really depressing somewhat religious death filled 313 arc, right? But there’s so much more to it

For context: Cyber (creator of the CDs and metaphor for ME….sometimes) has been talking directly to 313 quite frequently, cuz he had his shit together and was taking care of things in the computer world. So naturally 313 felt a little special knowing that their creator saw them as an equal, someone to talk to, someone real

and then one day the messages get shorter, the chats become sparse. Over time 313 grows more concerned—but Cyber said everything is fine and he’s still making CDs, so maybe he’s just busy right? But they never seem to go back to the way they were.

313 slowly comes to realize that he’s not coming back

while this is happening, 313 says screw it—Cyber always talked about rehabilitation in the failed batches, let’s try that! 1479 ends up being the easiest to work with and 313 dedicated their time to making them “perfect” (aka, like himself)

Cyber is lurking and watching this go on as he is finishing up the final touches on the last of the batch just before 3000-3013. 313 knows this. Well not really, he just assumed but he was right. 313 spent ages looking over the old chats between him and Cyber, hoping that one day he’d be able to return to that sort of relationship with him

and that’s where we get to where the actual arc begins….

one day, after 3013 had “disappeared”, 1479 gets a final message from Cyber

in short, it essentially said:

“You have potential to lead all of the CDs to greatness. I will be gone forever after you receive this message. It was nice working on you all”

meaning that 313 was no longer the favorite to be the standard or leader, 1479 was.

and that Cyber took his own life without even telling 313.

this….is devastating to him.

he was supposed to be the leader, the standard, his favorite. And he’s just going to leave like that? Appointing some failed freak he’s never spoken to before as the favorite? 1479 wouldn’t even be where they are if it weren’t for him!

cue an extremely deep spiral of wondering what he did wrong, what was flawed in him, what he could’ve done better. Blaming everyone else, being aggressive, borderline violent at times. Questioning why in the world Cyber would leave

Cut to: a little bit later when the rest of the CDs discover the broken screen and decide to leave. They stayed grouped together to an extent—traveling to a spot and splitting up before regrouping, mostly looking for 3013.

313 spends a lot of time poking around Cyber’s stuff—finally getting to see the place someone he held so dearly lived in. He keeps a lot of stuff, one of which being a diary long abandoned—a note about wanting to live in a specific spot in one of the last pages. for some strange reason, 313 is compelled to see it. Since Cyber couldn’t. Just to tie up some loose ends, you know?

cut to: this unspecified place Cyber wanted to live in. 313 had seen pictures of Cyber before, he looked at them a lot actually. He would know if he saw someone that looked similar to him.

which was a good skill to have, because casually walking down the street,

Alive and well,

was Cyber.

it couldn’t be a doppelgänger. 313 knew Cyber. That was Cyber.

this broke everything in his life. He spent years believing that Cyber was dead, when really he just abandoned all of them—abandoned him

He doesn’t know which one he preferred happening

either way, he was pissed.

so he did what any normal person did and followed him to the roof of his apartment to confront him

cue: a really emotional argument that I would have written back then

basically 313 said

“You lied to us, abandoned us, gave us morsels of hope just to crush it into dust”

and Cyber said

“I tried, I really did. But I wanted to move on to different things in my life. I’m a writer now, I still code, I was happy then and I’m happy now. It was better if I made you think I was dead over just leaving without a word”

to which they kept going back and forth about, and this is the part where 313’s “borderline violence” comes into play and the fact that they were on a roof.

it’s very obvious that 313 and Cyber share many traits, namely their inability to overreact and get very emotional in arguments. It devolves into petty insults and threats of violence soon enough, until one of them is backed to the edge without knowing it and the other hasn’t realized that they’re seconds away from causing a death

and so, the staging of Cyber’s suicide emerges

Cyber ends up falling—which only fucks with 313’s mental state more because now he really is gone. No second chances and it’s all their fault. They run from the scene and let people believe it was some sort of attempt.

he never told anyone, not by the end of the arc at least. I may have thought about pulling a remembrance-esque arc of him coming to terms with everything, but I didn’t even do the first arc so….yeah

[dulcewrites]

“I don’t give you permission to die before me” surprise she does, (but it’s also weirdly romantic, then I remember all the bullshit Aemond pulled on the reader and I immediately go back to hating him��).Nah I’m joking idk the readers end in FMO, but imagine she does. I hope she haunts Aemond and Alys if they pull a stunt like Daemon and Rhaenrya did. Which honestly was so disrespectful and every time I bring it up the Daemrya shippers always say “Laena would have wanted it anyways 🤪”. It’s not about what Laena would or wouldn’t want it’s disrespectful. Like imagine if your best friend fucked your husband at your funeral 🤨. Also the idea of Aemond catching them is something I’ve wondered could have happened, because I wouldn’t be surprised if it did happen 😭. Like they where getting down in the open where anyone could have caught them. They where lucky it was Aemond who was to busy trying claim Vhagar to actually care and then dealing with the loose of his eye instead of one their kids especially Baela or Rhaena. Imagine when Aemond was getting his eye stitched up he casually mentioned that Rhaenrya was busy with her uncle during her “nightly walk” 😭.

If Aemond saw it and if I was him, I would’ve pulled that shit out after Rhaenyra thought it was cute to say I needed to be sharply questioned. Like girl you want to be funny, I can get hilarious.

Ugh Baela or rhaena seeing it would’ve been so sad :(. Imagine your dad laughing at your mom’s funeral, ignoring you the whole time, and then fucking someone afterwards

The Rhaenyra/Daemon/laena thing is why I’m so confused when people act as if we missed some big story laid out in f&b. Or as if the writers took something from them to make Rhaenicent happen. I definitely think they did laena’s storyline/her as a character wrong. But the people who act like she would’ve been ok with Rhaenyra marrying Daemon (regardless of how close they could’ve been) are weird.

They are in the same boat as the people who act like two young girls possibly having an incestuous relationship with their old ass uncle cousin is the epitome of wlw representation.

[positivelyholland]

Hey can I request a steve rogers x daughter!reader where she is paralysed and he gets mad at her for something and makes her feel bad about her not being able to walk, the others try to comfort her. then she gives him the silent treatment and he is miserable and tries to make it up to her. is that too specific???? i’m sorry😂 btw I loved the Tom Holland x sister angst!!! you are a really good writer keep it up❤️

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Daughter!reader

genre: angst, fluff

warnings: reader is paralyzed, bad mental health, a few swears

A/N this is crap so i apologize 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lay in your bed, that’s all you could do. That’s all you have done for months. You have paralyzed from the shoulders down for a few months now, and you hated it.

You absolutely hated living this way, you hated your life right now in general.

A few things that you hate about your life:

you can’t move

you can’t be productive

you’re pretty sure your dad hates you for being paralyzed

While you obviously didn’t choose to be this way, your dad still acts as if he blames you for it. You used to be a very helpful person.

You felt bad that your dad had to take care of you, while being a superhero, so you decided to make it up to him by helping you with whatever he needs you to.

But you obviously can’t do that now that you literally cannot move, and your dad seems bothered by that.

“Hey Y/N” your dad said. He had just gotten back from a mission, and he always checks on you after he finishes those sorts of things.

“How did it go?” you wondered. You could still talk since your paralysis started at your shoulders. You were so thankful that you still could communicate with people, and it was the only thing that kept you sane.

“Good, how’re you feeling?” he asked you.

“Okay, I guess,” you responded. His expression changed at those words, into a look of sorrow.

“All the avengers really miss you. And we miss your help on missions,” he said sadly.

“I miss helping you guys too” you said, emotions matching his.

“God Y/N, why did you have to do this to yourself?” he asked you, changing the atmosphere to a more uncomfortable one.

“I didn’t choose this” you simply stated.

“Yeah, I know, but there’s so many things you could’ve done to prevent this” he seemed angry now, instead of his previous tone that was full of concern.

This has been happening a lot lately. Your dad is quite bothered by the lack of contributions coming from you, but he knows there’s nothing anyone can do about that. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t take his frustration out on you sometimes, though.

“I’m sorry, Dad” you said, which was your usual response when things like this happened. You’ve learned that arguing with your dad always makes matters worse, so you decided that you’ll just apologize whenever he’s mad, and it works most of the time.

Lucky for you, it did work. He just scoffed and then walked out of your room. Now, just because it didn’t get as bad as it could’ve, that doesn’t mean that his words didn’t hurt.

What he’s been saying lately has taken a huge toll on you, and not only was your relationship with your dad struggling, but your mental health was too.

Staying in the same spot in your bed all day, with minimal social interaction and not being able to be active would harm anyone’s mental health, and you weren’t exempt from that, and the situation with your dad wasn’t making it any better.

You felt tears start to fall down your cheek, and you quickly wiped them off before anyone saw them. Sometimes Nat or Wanda would randomly come into your room to check on you, or just to keep you company, as YouTube can only keep you entertained for so long.

That was one downside of living in the Avengers tower, anyone could walk into your room at any time. But you still didn’t bother to lock the door. You actually enjoyed the little random visits you would get.

Just as you wiped your face clean of any sign of sadness, more tears fell. You didn’t bother wiping them off this time, so you just kept silently crying to yourself, muffling your sobs with your pillow.

You were so caught up in your emotions that you didn’t hear Nat open the door to your room. The second she saw your tears, she rushed over to you, and her motherly instinct kicked in, as it usually did when she was with you.

“Oh my God, baby what happened?” she asked you. Usually you aren’t that open with most people, but it’s Natasha, so you decided to tell her everything. You didn’t see anything wrong with telling her. Besides, you trust Nat a lot, and she was basically your mom.

So, that’s exactly what you did. You told her about the shit your dad has been pulling for the past few months, and you told her about your struggling mental health.

Nat’s heart ached because of the things you’re telling her. She never likes seeing you upset, and the news that your own father caused your pain angers her even more.

After a few minutes, Wanda walked into the room to come bring you some soup she had just made, as she knows her homemade soup is your absolute favorite.

She too was heartbroken at the sight of you crying, but now you were crying in Natasha’s arms. The other difference was that she didn’t need to ask you what was wrong, she just decided to read your mind instead of making you explain everything to her.

Wanda approached where you and Nat were, and as she got there she hugged you on the opposite side Nat was on. The three females just stayed like this for some time.

Wanda started quietly humming to you, in an attempt to comfort you, and it worked. Nat was stroking your hair to help calm you down, as well

You might have one shitty dad, but at least you have two amazing moms (or at least that’s what you thought of them as). After staying in that same position for a little while, you heard your dad walk into the room.

Steve felt so bad for saying the things he did. To be honest, he was just genuinely broken at your current situation, and he was not mad at you at all for it, rather incredibly sorrowful.

He never meant to take his feelings out on you, but that’s just what happened. And when he noticed that Natasha and Wanda had been up in your room for some time, and then he heard your quiet cries, he knew he had really messed up.

So, he made his way up to your room, steps heavy with guilt. Once he saw you crying, with Wanda singing and Nat playing with your hair to comfort you, he swore he felt his heart shatter. They’re comforting her because of me, Steve realised.

He walked over to your bed, and cleared his throat in an attempt to make his presence known. At this, Nat gave him a death glare, but she then walked out of the room, knowing that Steve needed to apologize.

Wanda got the message too, and she kissed your forehead before giving your dad the second look that could kill he’s gotten that night.

After a few moments of awkward silence, Steve spoke up.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N. I did not mean what I said at all” he said. You could tell he genuinely did mean his apology, but you still didn’t respond. “I know that doesn’t justify what I said, but if I’m being honest, I said it because of how guilty I feel for your current situation” he continued.

At this, you turned your head towards him, the small movement being one of the only things you actually can do. Steve kept talking, trying his best to explain why he’s been saying the things he has been lately.

“I forgive you,” you simply say after some time.

“Thank you, Y/N/N, I love you” he told you.

After his apology that time, things were a lot better. Your relationship with your dad was a lot better, your mental health had improved, etc. On top of that, Steve made sure he’d try to never say anything that could hurt your as much as the words he said that day did, and since he is Captain America, he did a damn good job.

[river-bottom-nightmare]

hello - do you have any dick grayson-centric fic recs?

do i-do i have any dick grayson centric fic recs?? oh babe you have come to the riGHT PLACE. as any of my mutuals could tell you, i have so many goddamn fic recs it’s not even funny anymore. here are some of my personal top favourites:

1. And The World Came Crashing Down by @zhe-angst-diary  ~5k. a fic centered around dick’s self-sacrificial tendencies, especially for the batfam. a bit angsty, very much feels, a tad ooc, but i really did love it

2. bad signal by @prismatic-et-al 38k. the plotfic to end all plotfics. this author is one of the most brilliant dc fic authors i have ever come across, and the way they weave this dark, mysterious story is nothing short of ingenious. i was on the edge of my seat the entire time. again, brilliant.

3. Breathe In, Breathe Out by @kirazalea ~20k. this woman is one of my all time favourite writers for just some really really good stories about the batfam working through and overcoming their issues. this series is comprised of 2 fics that deal with the batfam discovering how much of an impact other people’s blatant sexualization and dehumanization of dick does to him, and how, over time and with help from his family, he picks himself up and starts to defend himself. really just a wonderful series

4. Declensions by @dustorange 13k. the best rom dick grayson fic to ever exist ever. you ever look at dc making dick romani and how they fuck up all the time and think “this could have had so much potential?” this work of art tackles that issue and creates something spectacular. each line of this fic had me screaming with joy. the robin cape symbolism? beautiful. i reread it all. the. time.

5. Don’t by @haunt-the-stars ~4k. do i have too many fics on here about dick dealing with + recovering from sexual assault and rape? probably. do i care? no. this fic takes a dive into trauma and how it can affect victims. it was absolutely heartbreaking, but also has the actual best wally + dick friendship i’ve ever read ever. seriously. if “wally west is a Good Bro” could be condensed into one fic, it would be this one. 

6. the fit of the cowl by @quillium ~4k. some people could argue dick was the best batman. other could argue the cowl only hurt dick. still others say dick could’ve been a much better batman if was better written. regardless of your opinion, you should definitely read this fic. it delves into the different reactions the batfam have to batman!dick. the family dynamics in this one were super interesting, and it’s always wonderful to read a fic about dick grayson  but from someone else’s eyes

7. Hard Truths and Other Realities by @ckbookish  ~108k. a series about dick feeling lost after being fired from robin and eventually finding his way again. featuring very very much wonderful uncle clark, and bruce isn’t an asshole, he’s just a worried dad that fucks up a lot but tries his best to make amends. also, dick bonding with jason. it basically takes you through that time period from the end of dick’s robin to him solidly affirming himself as nightwing and starting to forgive bruce. a really cool take on canon, loved this series!

8. Job Performance by @i-just-want-to-destroy ~3k. ohhhhhh dear god does this fic give me the feels. set during s1 yj, it shows what being a vigilante since the grand age of 9 does to someone, how much it hurts dick to compartmentalize, how much he doesn’t even realize it. this fic leaves you with a sense of “wow. this child. he’s really fucked up.” in a heartwrenching way.

9. a soft place to land by @bluebeauregard 3k. the best dick + tim being brothers fic i’ve ever read. people like to expand on his gradual acceptance and love of jason, people go batshit crazy over him practically parenting damian. and while i do love those, dick and tim had the best canon sibling relationship in the comics (at least, in pre52). this fic takes that and runs with it, and it’s so goddamn unique. i have literally never read this idea anywhere, so i was blown away by both the fic and the way the author wrote it. 

10. touch starved by @iwhumpyou ~4k. we’ve all seen fics where timmy’s touch starved from not receiving much affection from his parents growing up and the rest of the batfam smothers him in hugs. but what i really want is a fic where dick’s the one touchstarved because he grew up in the goddamn circus where everyone was close, but ever since he came to live with bruce, he’s been starved of the affection he used to so freely get, because his entire family is most certainly not the touchy-feely type. and for added angst, he doesn’t do anything about it because he knows his family has issues with trust/intimacy and he wants to make them as comfortable as possible. anyway apparently that fic exists and it’s this one read it and sob with me will you?

11. you gotta tip on the tightrope by Anonymous 12k. for people that don’t actually know much about comics canon and why exactly dick went undercover at spyral, this fic is absolutely wonderful. it shows the lead up of events that led to dick faking his death and leaving, and why exactly he chose to listen to bruce. (i’m using “chose” liberally here). plus, sibling bonding!! specifically with jason!

12. young volcanoes by @dottie-wan-kenobi 3k. i haven’t read this fic in a while, so i don’t remember some of the finer details, but i do remember loving it. also i have it bookmarked on ao3 with the tag “THIS!!!!!!!” so that counts for something. this fic focuses more on dick’s relationship with the titans rather than bruce or the jl, and centers around what their friendship has done for dick/how it’s helped him, and how much he loves them. a wonderful team fic. 

anyway, i hope you enjoy these babe!! these fics are all so so incredible, and i just want to give all of these amazingly talented authors one big incredible hug. 

[casmick-consequences]

Cas&Dean VS Claire&Jack

So I wrote [a small little theory] a while ago as to why I think Claire and Jack wouldn’t have been shown on screen together/have any connection throughout the show on-screen/off-screen at all. And so here I will some points as to why I think that is. 

AKA here’s the long awaited essay/conspiracy theory y’all have been asking for.

First of all; let me start off by saying this is 100% meant as a joke (no it’s not) and it’s not to be taken seriously (yes it is) as it’s literally just a dumb theory (it definitely isn’t). And second; fuck the C*W for contributing to every little bit of tinhatting this fandom (especially us hellers) has succumbed to.

-

Now; for this theory we have to understand a few things:

How Dean and Cas work as individuals

How Claire and Jack work as individuals

How Dean and Cas work as a duo

Let’s start with the first two things.

How Dean and Cas work as individuals

Dean Winchester is a masculine, tough but loving hunter. He cultivates a “bad-boy personality”, and makes sarcastic jokes at even the most morbid times. Underneath, though, he's become hardened by life as a warrior (as Daddy’s blunt instrument, if you will). He’s been taught to fight his father’s battles, and protect the ones he loves and cares for. But soon began to see that neither of his parents (especially his dad) did the job they were given when they had children. He didn’t just have to be a brother; he had to be a father and mother. He’s had to grow walls around him to stay strong for his little brother, but over time, after making a family for himself, it became easier to tear those walls down. However, he has his weak spots and is an emotional and loving human being through and through.

Castiel, the Angel of Thursday, is an angel of the Lord. He’s lived for aeons, and as an angel has (just like Dean) been taught to fight the battles of his creator and father. He’s a warrior, and he’s been given the job to follow the orders of said creator. Only for those orders to be thrown out the window once he meets Dean Winchester. The man who showed him that hate and anger isn’t always the true answer and that you can choose to be good. Everything that he has been taught slowly breaks away as his hard exterior crumbles, and he develops into a being with emotions, as he slowly but eventually learns to love and care for this man, and with that; humanity.

How Claire and Jack work as individuals

Claire Novak, a woman who has lead a tragic life, where she lost both her parents early on. Her father said yes to be the (permanent) vessel of an Angel, and her mother just disappeared after dropping her off to her Grandmother. After the grandmother had passed away, she was left alone. She had to fight through the world on her own, as she put a wall around herself to make herself stronger for the people around her. It took a while before she found her place in a loving family filled with strong women, who didn’t just help bring her walls down, but build a home instead.

Jack Kline is an innocent, naive but loving Nephilim. The son of the human Kelly Kline and the archangel Lucifer. He was destined for evil, as a Nephilim is one of the most powerful creatures in existence. But, with the help of his three Godfathers (heh), he learns that he doesn’t have to be evil. He can be whatever he wants to be. Controlling his powers has been hard, but no matter what happened, his mindset never changed as he grew to love the people and love the things around him. His biological father saw his power, but his chosen father saw his kind soul. Castiel believed he could create paradise, and he did, as he became the God that the universe deserved.

There are alot of parallels between Dean/Claire and Jack/Cas that can be compared to here. Let me show you a few:

So we’ve established that with Claire being Dean-coded, and Jack being Cas-coded, there could’ve definitely been potential for a cute Claire/Jack dynamic in the show. Why wouldn’t they have done that, you think? Perhaps this question can be answered when we look at thing number 3:

How Dean and Cas work as a duo

Destiel is the relationship between the hunter Dean and the angel Castiel. Castiel was ordered by God to free him from Hell, and afterwards he was supposed to do as he was told while Dean was supposed to figure out how to “stop the apocalypse” which happened to be a bunch of garbo afterwards knowing what we know now. Nonetheless, Castiel didn’t listen, as he quickly grew fond of the hunter and, because of him, developed a sense of emotion and free will. This lead to Castiel helping Dean throughout the Apocalypse, and beyond, and they’ve been best friends ever since.

There have been MULTIPLE essays on Tumblr about how this relationship works, and it would be silly of me to try and summarize stuff that hasn’t been said a million times already. But basically; What they have is quite a bit more than best friendship. It has been confirmed in 15x18, Despair, that Castiel has been in love with Dean for quite some time, as Dean’s own feelings are kind of all over the place. Nothing has been confirmed, yet nothing has been denied. But, seeing as all the insane things Dean has done for/because of/regarding Castiel... for instance:

defended his behavior to his brother and father when neither trusted him in season 6

kept his trenchcoat when he “died” in season 7, and keeping it with him in the trunk of his car(s) for the entirety of Castiel’s absence.

absolutely despises angels, and hates praying, yet he only ever prays to Castiel when he needs anything because he’s the only one he trusts

couldn’t get his mind of of him when he was possessed by Lucifer, and later taken by Amara in season 11

Has Castiel being referred to as his Colette by Cain (subtext but not really subtext because it was so incredibly obvious)

was supposed to be completely enamored by Amara and was supposed to be so hypnotizingly attracted to her that he couldn’t focus on anything else, yet he called out for Castiel’s name when it came down to it (aka the equivalent of calling out someone else’s name during sex) 

keeps looking at him like that

acted like a grieving widow when Castiel died in season 13

gets down on his knees to pray to, cry for and apologize to Castiel in Purgatory when there’s millions of creatures hunting his ass

...it’s easy to say that this is more than just a “brotherly friendship” between the two. There is dialogue that would NOT have worked between Sam/Cas because it would’ve felt weird. I wonder why.

So now to get back on topic; why is it that we’ve never seen Claire and Jack on screen together?

Is it because the writers didn’t have time to put them together in any given scenario whatsoever? Is it because the writers didn’t care enough for Claire to give her some more airtime with the boys? 

Or is it perhaps that if there was a possibility that they’d be on screen together, that they’d have a very similar (if not the same) connection to one another as Dean and Cas, only written as an actual little brother/big sister friendship dynamic?

-

So yes, TL;DR: the actual reason that Claire and Jack never met is because they would’ve had the exact same dynamic as Dean and Cas, but in this case platonic. Which would’ve meant that the audience would’ve seen a clear difference between the Dean/Cas dynamic and Claire/Jack dynamic, and it would’ve shown that the way they’ve been writing and directing the Dean/Cas scenes is romantic.

thank you very much, and I bid thee a very good night. <3

[boypussydilf]

oh my god, talk about the doctor and the master now. i accidentally typoed doctor as cocter at first. cockter. is this anything

the cockter. timecock. i am the doctor and this is my cock. im so sorry. everyone look at my immortal freaks . there are no cocks involved. um originally i wasnt gonna put this post under a readmore bc for some reason i wasnt expecting it to get long but like, it did, so, n. now those sentences r gonna be all anyone sees unless they click through. that’s great

describe their canon relationship/dynamic

BY GOD!!! they’re childhood friends. …i think. i think its said or at least implied that they knew each other As Actual Kids and not, like… however the fuck old they were in The Academy. im saying they knew each other as kids. played in each others backyards or whatever the fuck baby time lords do. anyway. childhood friends childhood BEST friends who Continued to be best friends for the rest of their lives because they’re so similar theyre practically like the same person. except for that the master let the society they were raised in & their own ego get to them and goes around believing they Deserve completely to be obeyed and served and get to do whatever the fuck they Want, and the doctor on the other hand had a granddaughter to take care of and then he meets humans and learns The Wonders Of Compassion by force. They are the same person on different paths and are forced to be enemies because of it. “Forced” by their own decisions and worldviews, but still. They were best friends who promised to Be Together Forever and then they left each other and they both just want to go back to being best friends and doing everything they planned, SO badly, but neither of them is going to budge from their own way of thinking, so all they get is little bits of banter and the hope that maybe they can convert the other one to THEIR side and scraps and echoes of what they could have if they had each other.

And also they try to kill each other. Mostly the master tries to kill the doctor. He actually SUCCEEDED one time but yknow, regeneration.

your ideal/headcanon version of it? how does it differ from how it is in canon & why is this your favorite version? any other alternate versions of it you enjoy?

oh fuck before i do anything else i need to go look for one fic thst isnt actually related to any part of this except being about them I FINALLY FUCKING FOUND IT. GOD. i dont think i have time to reread it tonight though. sad. SO ANYWAY. they are one of those pairs where like. I like them so much for specifically exactly what they are in canon instead of for Potentials and visions i have in my head. they’re perfect the way they are. I mean that technically varies from era to era of the show because different writers but…. the core concept is always pretty much the same and it’s good. they’re good the way they are.

I do have to dedicate a line to the headcanon people have that twelve & missy were fucking in the vault. Sorry. Yknow i think ive seen two different fics where bill refers to it as “the sex vault” in her mind in passing. Reasonable conclusion i guess

what do you like about their relationship, why is it interesting or enjoyable to you?

i like wanting something you can’t have & wishing to go back to something you can never return to, and i like character foils and people who are just variations on the same concept, constant reminders of what you could’ve been if you’d taken 1 different step. and also i like when they make stupid jokes at each other like the fate of the world isnt at stake or like they arent about to fight each other or so on

what about the individual characters involved? what does this relationship mean to them, what makes it unique among their relationships?

*taps literally just the entire summary of their relationship*

Ok that and like …. they both on some level see each other as the only person in the universe who can TRULY understand them. They’re Time Lords for gods sake theyve had superiority complexes ingrained in them since 5 minutes after they were born (or loomed, whatevers to your liking) and even the Doctor isn’t completely immune to like. Oh my massive alien brain and two thousand year life means you humans can never really Get My Feelings. which is sort of fair but not really. And they’re both, like, basically exiled from their home- when their home EXISTS gallifrey is destroyed with all the time lords dead every other week but like the rest of the time it isn’t. anyway they’re both Renegade Time Lords, they decided to Leave and to interfere in the lives of Outsiders and they have broken like every law that exists and they are no longer welcome home. So with both of them thinking they’re Above any other species, as much as the doctor tries not to, and both of them being unable to turn to any other members of their own species, they look at each other and go. You’re the only motherfucker in this universe who can handle me. You’re the only person who can get me. You’re the only place i can go to for real true complete understanding. Please come back to me so we can be bitches together.

they’re also each other’s Exceptions <3 the master will just kill people instantly with no hesitation no second thought and no remorse. and like. Technically regeneration makes it. harder to die. what with the coming back to life thing. but there are ways around that. The master could straight up kill the doctor forever they could’ve done it already if they wanted to. but they don’t bc they care and theyre hoping they can still be friends again. And the doctor tries not to kill people, generally, but some threats outweigh that. If there’s someone with a bomb that can end all life in the universe, and they can’t be reasoned with or incapacitated, but you do have a gun, shoot them in the head. On the other hand, the master poses a very significant threat to a lot of people all the time and the doctors like. ican’t kill them tho. theyre my friend :( Doctor people are dying

favorite interaction they have in canon

the scene in. i think its the sea devils? where they have like a 3 minute long swordfight and towards the end the doctor has the master’s sword and is holding him at swordpoint. stops to steal one of his sandwiches and take a bite. then gives his sword back to keep fighting bc hes having fun.

also like. literally every time they interact in series 10. itsall so fucking good but thats also very nonspecific so mmmm. the whole bit at the end of the eaters of light, with the doctor going “that’s the trouble with hope, it’s hard to resist”, and saying, maybe the master’s turning Good, but maybe it’s all an act, and her agreeing, “yes, that sounds like something I’d do” and it’s so- s10 is so fucking good, man, and they manage to play it JUST right so that up until the last minute you really just… dont… know. maybe the master is actually changing. maybe she really is feeling remorse and remembering compassion maybe she really does want to be good and maybe she really is trying and maybe she really is getting there. but maybe its just an act. a trap. another trick from a master of disguises. a way to get under the doctor’s skin. you can think one way or the other but you can never feel certain until the moment she literally kills her past self to turn around and side with the doctor. to go fight alongside her friend, to go Do Good, despite the fact that she’d be walking directly into a hopeless situation, a certain death, there is no benefit to this there won’t even be a victory and she’s doing it anyway, and maybe she wouldn’t do that on her own, not yet, but she’ll do it to be by her best friend while he makes another one of his stupid, stupid decisions.

and then she dies, and he has no idea she ever turned around. but it’s the thought that counts. without hope, without witness, without reward.

doctor who series 10 is just *clenches fist* god. the master just wants to live. the master just wants their friend back. these are the things that keep coming back. these are some of the most crucial aspects. and. and. and s10 is. she wants those things so badly that she will give up everything else she has, she’ll change her entire life, become a completely different person, however long it takes, however difficult it is, all for those two things. this just became about the master for a while i think. thats ok.

favorite interaction they have in your head/a situation you want to put them in

Oh god oh fuck i dont have anything for this ummm. I am so fucking tired. I want them to take a nap there we go thats it post wrapped thanks for coming everybody

[dogbearinggifts]

What are your thoughts on tua S2? Did you feel like the characters grew? What did you like? What did you not? I’m interested in your perspective. Your analysis are super thoughtful and interesting!

Aw, thanks, Anon!

Overall, I really enjoyed S2 and thought it was a solid follow-up to S1. I do have my quibbles about it, so I think (for ease of reference and because my thoughts are a little scattered today) I’ll list some of my personal highlights (in no particular order) before getting into what I didn’t like as much.

Big spoilers ahead.

Allison. I thought they handled her storyline especially well. Of all the siblings, I think she had the most difficult obstacles placed in her way (not only is she a Black woman landing in 1961 Dallas, but she’s a Black woman landing in 1961 Dallas who can’t even speak in her own defense for a year) and they sugarcoated exactly none of it. The writers pulled no punches when showing what civil rights protesters went through, which just made their nonviolent response all the more breathtaking. Allison’s fear and anger during those scenes were palpable even as she kept them hidden. But along with that horror, we see the kindness and warmth of the Dallas Black community, the women who take her in simply because she needs their help, and her love for Ray, perhaps heretofore THE most thoughtful husband ever portrayed on screen. I loved him, and I loved him and Allison together. While I understand and respect his choice to stay in 1963, I wish they’d gotten more time together. They both deserved it.

Vanya. We got to see how much the baggage from her past affected her by glimpsing what she might be like if it were taken away. It’s an interesting philosophical question, and it was explored well, in my opinion. She finds it easier to love and be loved, and she stands up for herself more readily—but she also doesn’t hesitate to use powers she can’t quite control and threatens Five without fully realizing how dire her threat is (or how it might dredge up traumatic memories she doesn’t know exist). The moment where Ben finds her curled up, fully convinced she’s a monster, was heartbreaking. I loved watching her find happiness with Sissy, even if that was fleeting (and dear god, Sissy deserved her happy ending with Vanya, dammit, I don’t care if it would fuck up the timeline). Her patience and sweetness with Harlan were just beautiful. And the way she used the confidence she gained during her amnesia to fully come into her own not to exact revenge on her siblings, but to save them, was fucking phenomenal.

The humor. There was a lot more humor this season, and it was awesome. So many iconic scenes—Olga Foroga, Luther babysitting two homicidal Fives, Elliot awkwardly lecturing his guests on the history of Jello, “NEW TIMELINE NEW ME,” “Your vagina needs glasses,” AJ the fish gobbling up the cigarette bubbles, Five getting to say “fuck”….this season was a lot funnier than the previous one, and I think that was one of its strengths.

Klaus’ cult. It was played for laughs, which I both expected and thought was the best way to handle it. He didn’t want to start a new religion with himself at the center; he just wanted to not get thrown out of any more diners, but Destiny’s Children had other ideas. The “I too am a fraud!” scene was hilarious and tickled the question of whether or not a religion founded on false pretenses can still help those within it find meaning.

Luther. Getting him away from his dad, his siblings, and the Academy was exactly what he needed to become the pure of heart and dumb of ass genius we always knew he was, but his first major step in that direction was heartbreaking. We all knew he’d be rejected once he got to the Academy. We all knew Reginald would rip his heart out and stomp on it in his admittedly fashionable shoes. It gets Luther out on his own and forces him to become his own person apart from his dad, but that doesn’t make it any easier to watch. He got the positive character development he needed, but the catalyst was tragic.

Diego. We see, for the first time, exactly how Reginald kept him in line—not with meds or with PTSD-inducing torture, but with words. Even when he knows Diego as little more than a stranger, Reginald is able to rip off his skin and fling it in his face with a single diatribe; and even at 30, with years away from his dad, Diego is left unable to speak, feeling as if all of his accomplishments up to that point were the work of a dumb kid who thought he was smarter and more capable than he actually was.

Luther and Diego sharing a braincell. Luther has bad ideas. Diego has bad ideas. When they put their bad ideas together, they get terrible ideas. I loved watching them work together as a team, rather than being at each others’ throats for most of the season, even if I’m left hoping Olga Foroga had a pleasant and quiet day after that phone call.

Reginald. At first glance, it may look like the writers were trying to make him likable so they could parade him around as your average abusive-parent-with-a-soft-side. But it’s more nuanced than that. Abusive parents (and abusers in general) often fly under the radar because they fool outsiders into thinking they’re good people. They’re active in their communities. They give to charity. They have friends who attest to their virtue, significant others who think they’re the greatest. And that’s what we see with Reginald. We see him as the rest of the world did: an intelligent, eccentric man with a sharp sense of humor who cared deeply about scientific advancement. That’s how he evaded suspicion—because there were stories from years past of lively parties at his mansion, of what a gentleman he was to Grace and of how he did everything he could to save little Pogo. But those stories would all have come from people he considered his equals. When he’s with people he considers his inferiors—aka, the Umbrella kids—he’s openly condescending and demeaning. We get to see how he fooled the world, and it is chilling.

Elliot. He deserved better, and you can ship him with any one of the Hargreeves kids and get the cutest thing ever. 

The Swedes. They said so much while speaking very little.

Ben. He got more personality and screen time, and it was glorious. His love of his family and resentment toward Klaus practically leapt off the screen. The way he says “I’ve missed you all…so much” once they’ve all left was one of those right-in-the-feels moments; and watching him get so much of what he’s wanted for years when he possesses Klaus was beautiful.

Now, as for things I took issue with….

Ben. I understand why they ended his arc the way they did. I get that they were probably afraid the Klaus/Ben dynamic would grow stale if they didn’t change it somehow and wanted to give him a larger role in S3. His death(???) was heartbreaking and extremely well-done. But it also wasn’t foreshadowed. We never got any sense of what ghosts in the TUA ‘verse are, so the fact they can be destroyed by a ton of sound-turned-energy or by going too far into someone’s psyche or whatever happened….it’s not that it doesn’t make sense so much as there’s not enough evidence to determine whether or not it makes sense. It feels like the writers just kinda made that up so they’d have a reason to change Ben’s relationship dynamics, but if that’s the case, couldn’t they have done it another way? Couldn’t they have made it so the immense energy or psychic woo-woo or whatever gave him a power-up instead of destroying him? Vanya transferred some of her energy into Harlan and brought him back to life. Couldn’t something similar have happened with Ben? And if it tied him to Vanya as well as to Klaus, great! More fodder for angst and humor! (”Vannyyyyyyyy, stop hogging Ben!” “You got him for 17 years, Klaus, you can part with him for 20 minutes.” “Guys, don’t I get a say in this?”) I’m glad they didn’t write him out of the series entirely, but I still wish they’d kept him and all the character development he’d gotten throughout S2.

Episode 10. It looks like they tried to cram half a season’s worth of developments into 45 minutes. Twenty minutes in, I’d already said “Wait what the fuck” half a dozen times. A lot of those moments were explained later on, and I was able to make enough inferences to fill in any lingering plot holes, but…still. Too much stuff, too little time. E9 was a perfectly satisfying ending to the season. Yes, it leaves the siblings stranded in 1963, but they could’ve tied up those loose ends in the S3 premiere.

Lila. She’s an incredibly fun character, but her arc is kind of a mess. Most of that is due to E10, and I do feel that more time to let her arc breathe would’ve worked wonders, but I’m left feeling like her turn from “Handler is the best mom ever and I lurve Diego too” to “KILL DIEGO AND HIS EVIL FAMILY” to “Handler is a bad mom and Diego is right” happened too quickly.

The Commission. Okay, so, the Handler announces the entire Board has been killed, and she’s stepping in as director even though everyone appears to know she’s been demoted (and demoted pretty severely—she went from having an office bigger than some apartments to being a case management drone). There’s suspicion and lots of it. But then, La Resistance is….ten or so people in a single room? And when she calls the temps agents to her side, thousands of them show up ready and willing to fight and die? I dunno. Just seems like there should’ve been more splintering going on there. Again, I think they needed more time to tie everything up.

Aside from those complaints, I loved the season. I set aside most of a day to binge it, and I do not regret that decision at all.

[miraculouscontent]

Always.

“Truth” is just... I mean, I want to say “garbage” but that doesn’t even do how bad it is justice? Like, okay, I take four major issues with it (my followers be like: just four? :P):

First is the writing in general and the continuity of it all. This episode looks like it’s been through multiple drafts and the final product is an amalgamation of a bunch of them with no coherency between any of them. I already could kind of guess it from the Adrimi kiss that the finale removed, but it’s obvious that there were going to be Adrimi/Lukanette arcs in Season 4 but then stuff happened (i.e: the staff being cowards) and they got cut. It’s totally possible that the plot with Jagged Stone being the father and Marinette having to keep secrets from Luka were still the same episode even in the original draft, but I imagine it at least wasn’t episode one.

There are other, more subtle hints as well, like the episode giving no time to Luka learning that Jagged is his father (making the fandom wonder if Luka remembered when he was Truth) and Ladybug being shocked when she realizes that the akuma is Luka as if she didn’t already see him be akumatized. Juleka also gets weirdly sidelined in the episode despite being Luka’s twin (Astruc has stated that both Luka and Juleka are older and Juleka got held back, which is why she’s in Marinette’s grade but Luka isn’t), so she’s Jagged’s offspring as well. One might presume that Juleka just never cared at all but that doesn’t mean she shouldn’t be allowed to interact directly with the guy or have any involvement at all. All it would’ve taken is for Luka to mention that Juleka never cared about who their father was but he did, thereby implying that Juleka’s reaction to Jagged would probably be more like, “oh okay.”

You know, if they didn’t reduce her to incoherent mumbling.

Second is the timing of this episode. We had the New York special with Paris being destroyed, but it’s clearly fine here (so I guess it isn’t canon now; thank God honestly), and while it’s technically possible that enough time has passed (supported by the vague implication that Marinette having to miss out on dates with Luka has gone on for a while, given Tom and Sabine’s lack of reaction to them dating), it’s not supported by Marinette examining the Miracle Box as if she’s only just gotten it.

There’s also Shadow Moth, where we’re shown an extended version of the scene from the end of “Miracle Queen” where Gabriel repairs the peacock miraculous, giving the episode a “Volpina”->”The Collector” vibe but then why are the events lining up the way they do???

The narrative also does a really bad job at showing us why Marinette is so strapped for time. She has guardian duties now but you’d think it’d balance out with her not having to go to Fu anymore for guardian training (you know, that thing we never saw but was said to be happening or at least that it was Fu’s intent to have it happen). You could argue that maybe Shadow Moth is more active, but then Chat Noir should be affected by this too; Ladybug states outright that she’s been busy and Chat Noir responds with something akin to, “oh I know, because you’re guardian,” which implies that it’s her guardian duties keeping her busy and Shadow Moth is just interrupting her dates specifically.

But we don’t even see what responsibilities she has added on as guardian. I knew the writers would make it so her being guardian was a hassle, but it’s the first episode of the series and we’ve gotten next to no answers for what being guardian actually adds.

It’s almost like this was a rushed first episode to break up the only thing that unambiguously made Marinette happy for the sake of bringing the love square back and needlessly making her suffer because the writers think it’s hilarious.

Speaking of which, the third thing thing is the comedy because--just--I hate the comedy in this show.

Like, just to start, there’s the kwami, who clearly begin with their mob mentality from the later episode of “Furious Fu” and all proceed to act like children. No, I didn’t expect them to all be wise (I mean, Xuppu exists and is very much not that, having been implied to be a fit for Kim who is known for being a total himbo), but I don’t expect them to all scatter like they do. Kaalki in particular, who was shown to be more poised and refined, blatantly reveals herself to a bunch of civilians just for the sake of Marinette freaking out and needing to make up an excuse.

Same with Alya and her friends. Marinette is panicking because of the kwami and Alya “deduces” (while shading Marinette so blatantly that it’s insulting) that Adrien must be there in her house which--maybe don’t SAY THAT OUT LOUD in case Adrien is literally in her room???). Then Marinette gets a call from Luka, shouts his name, and the girls do a complete 180 in support of Lukentte. It’s not like I’m not for them supporting whatever Marinette wants to do, but the shift is so sudden (and contradicts “Frozer”) that it gave me whiplash and the entire scene ends up being pointless since the girls still go with the “Marinette is in love with Adrien” thing when Truth asks them what Marinette’s secret is. Like, we could’ve gotten small, stupid secrets that everyone thought only they knew about Marinette, but instead it’s just the same thing over and over again (which makes no sense since, by the time Alya blabs the secret - which Alya has already told Nino before anyway - it’s no longer a secret therefore making the answer invalid).

Heck, the whole “secret” thing could’ve even been the people Truth shoots finding ways of answering his questions in a way that is technically telling the truth but also not really, such as if Anarka had answered the, “Who’s my father?” question with, “someone you know/someone famous,” so as to avoid saying that it’s Jagged Stone. It’s just boring seeing characters answer with whatever the asker wants to hear instead of being able to find a way around it.

And then there’s Chat Noir, who’s just--ugh.

Like--okay, I’m going to be extremely petty for a moment and just go off because I hate Chat Noir’s role in this entire episode. The Season 3 finale went out of its way to have Chat Noir be all like, “I have a girlfriend,” when it was a lie, and then Season 4 just parkours around Ladybug telling him that she’s dating (Ladybug clearly took no issue with Chat Noir telling her he’s dating so it’s not like she’s worried about issues there; she’s gotten on his case before in episodes like “Startrain” so there are exceptions) because they want to keep having him flirt and not be sAd because this is Marinette’s episode of suffering and Chat Noir actually having to face the reality that Ladybug is dating (not just in love with someone else) would’ve actually been interesting. Chat Noir gets tons of unnecessary screentime in the episode - mostly for the show to shove in LadyNoir shipping fuel - and then actively avoids telling him the obvious thing because he would’ve actually been forced to grow/develop/stop flirting.

It would’ve been so cute and sweet to see him awkwardly trying to flirt without overstepping boundaries (so more like banter than flirt) or - you know - actually try to support Ladybug and want her to be able to finish her dates by him offering to keep akuma/sentimonsters busy, but no, he’s just left in the dark.

The finale had Chat Noir supporting her (terribly but I digress) and then doesn’t do anything with it at the start of Season 4, meaning his support of her was completely meaningless and just there.

His first appearance is him pranking Ladybug when she’s already overstressed and busy, which comes off as super poor taste and I’m both glad he got splatted into that window for it but also upset because it’s screentime completely gone to waste, and of course it’s just a lead up to him guilting her by being like, “nooo the only thing that hurts me is when you leave me alone during patrol!”

I know he’s teasing (...probably) but it leaves a bad taste in my mouth because we know (well, I knew because I know how this show works) that Luka and Marinette were going to break up because of Marinette’s hectic schedule, so it just comes off as insensitive to joke about it, especially when Ladybug’s busy guardian status just serves as a reminder that Fu is gone.

Even when he’s protecting Ladybug from Truth’s questions by cutting in and asking a question of his own, of course he asks about himself to forcibly fish compliments out of Ladybug because she can’t lie to him, and of course they have Ladybug compliment his humor most of all as if that trait hasn’t nearly gotten them in danger multiple times and she’s been repeatedly annoyed when he decides to joke during the worst possible times. It’s as if the writers wanted to pat themselves on the back for their own comedy, so they had Ladybug be a mouthpiece to stroke Chat Noir’s ego.

He claims he won’t force a truth out of her and then literally forces her to say what her favorite things about him are. I acknowledge that this can be seen as me nitpicking but we went from the finale where Chat Noir actually stepped up and took charge (because Ladybug was stressed but I guess him doing anything useful is just whenever it serves the plot) to this where he’s back to flirting constantly and jamming in as much LadyNoir shipping fuel as physically possible. It’s not that he’s useless but he’s annoying and takes up space in an episode that’s supposed to be about Luka and Marinette.

And that leads us into the fourth thing, which is the break-up and just the treatment of Luka and Marinette in general. I could go on and on about how the Season 3 finale built up their relationship just to tear it down in the first episode of Season 4, but that’s not the main issue here.

Luka brought Marinette comfort. He made her happy. He never judged her. He was happy to just date her regardless of any conflicted feelings she might have because hey, who is he to complain if she wants to give him a try and who knows what’ll happen?

And the season couldn’t even give one moment of them being unambiguously happy without ruining or interrupting it. I was ready for the break-up and I was even ready for it to be the first episode but I wasn’t ready for it to be so bad.

Marinette’s Adrien pictures appear out of nowhere (again, makes no sense for the timeline) when they’ve been gone for basically all of Season 3 and even “The Puppeteer 2″ specifically which makes a direct reference to “Troublemaker,” the episode that purposefully overdid it with her pictures (”Truth” has more hanging up and clearly used “Troublemaker” as a reference, by the way). They’re just there for force the love square and Adrien into the episode as much as possible to remind the audience that Adrien breathes. There is literally no purpose to any mention of Adrien and bringing him up isn’t even relevant to Marinette and Luka’s break-up.

It’s just upsetting to know that the umbrella scene from “Origins” (which is already flawed in and of itself) kickstarts this whole thing. Adrien did basically nothing there except for clear up a misunderstanding and give Marinette an umbrella when his ride was a few meters away and Marinette’s house was just across the street, but that actives Marinette’s absolutely crippling crush on him that lasts for 3-4 seasons. Marinette is in this eternal struggle of not being allowed to grow and change because the writers think her stammering/crushing on Adrien is funny while actively punishing her for having this crush in the first place (again, like in the scene with Alya, which insults Marinette for her crush when she wasn’t even panicking over her crush).

It’s the same with Luka, and I can’t believe that it took me until this episode to realize that he and Marinette are both treated the same way: tormented by episodes for having a crush on someone. Episodes will go out of their way to forcibly insert Adrien into the plot to both humiliate Marinette and make Luka feel awkward when the episode isn’t supposed to be about Adrien at all. “Truth” is just “Desperada 2.0″ except Adrien is barely on screen at all and they still felt the need to name drop him constantly. The writers are so sensitive to the idea of people jumping onto another ship or forgetting that Adrien exists that they’ll find any possible way to include him.

“Silencer” knew better. “Silencer” knew that Marinette’s life didn’t have to revolve around the mere mention of Adrien’s name and that she had other interests/desires/traits outside of him. Adrien isn’t brought up once and it was great because the show didn’t feel the need (for once) to throw Adrien into an episode that he had nothing to do with.

Even if I was a love square shipper, I would feel insulted by “Truth” because one half of my ship kept getting name dropped and used as a tool to humiliate the other half, which makes it all the more eyeroll-worthy when the love square stans of the fandom praise this episode for breaking Lukanette up when--oh, wait, they didn’t even break up “because Adrien.”

And that ends up being the real thing here. The writers had to invent a reason for Marinette and Luka to break up. We already know that Jagged Stone being Luka’s dad is a retcon (not technically in the show’s canon but in information we heard about outside of it), so they shoved in Luka having issues about not knowing his father specifically so that he would be pushed over the edge when Marinette couldn’t tell him about her being Ladybug.

When Luka and Marinette were just together and hanging out, Adrien wasn’t mentioned once. Say whatever about the Adrien pictures being on the wall and Marinette’s stammering (she always says stupid stuff when she panics - especially stuff she doesn’t mean - so I’m not upset with her so much as the writing for having her mess up in that specific way), but the only time Marinette talks about Adrien at all in the episode is when someone else brings him up.

She goes on a date with Luka to the cinema and they were having a great time without Adrien involved at all. I know I already stressed this point in a previous post, but one of the reasons that I find Lukanette to be so amazing is because the show actually focuses on Marinette’s interests and doesn’t force her to be the writer’s mouthpiece for gushing about their sunshine boy a punching bag for comedy. In every Lukanette scene that doesn’t bring up Adrien/before Adrien shows up, Marinette is either praised, able to be happy, or is showing one of her interests that isn’t aDrIeN, and whereas Adrien being on-screen around Marinette usually just means that she’s gushing about/stammering around him with no development, Lukanette features us actually learning more about Luka or other characters.

“Captain Hardrock” - lets her bond with Luka over a shared interest in Jagged Stone, and Luka is established as a sort of empath who uses music as a way to speak for himself

“Frozer” - gets to practice ice skating with Luka, who is actually good at ice skating and also can tie laces despite not tying his own because he’s a rebel

“Desperada” - gets to try out guitar with Luka and we learn that Luka has been playing guitar for as long as he can remember

“Silencer” - showcases Marinette’s interest in fashion and properly introduces Kitty Section; has a plot featuring all of them together doing something not even remotely love-related and we get actual confirmation of Luka’s crush on Marinette, along with Marinette’s reaction (blushy+happy; just saying, idk how anyone could watch “Silencer” and not think that Marinette was crushing on Luka)

“Heart Hunter” - Marinette gets a song written for/about her and Luka is established to have a job

“Truth” - brings up Lukanette’s shared interest in Jagged Stone, features Marinette’s interest in fashion when she gives him a gift she made + had Jagged Stone sign, and shows her raising her voice but not being judged by Luka for it, who’s happy with her just the way he is

When the show focuses on Lukanette, it’s all about lifting Marinette up, praising her, and making her feel good. When Adrien is involved or it’s hyper-fixating on Marinette’s crush on him, it’s about bringing her down and making her feel bad for a crush they keep forcing her to hold onto and humiliating her for.

Point being, the writers had to force their way into getting Lukanette broken up because of their precious love square and the fact that Marinette and Luka being happy is the opposite of what they want.

It’s embarrassing to watch a team full of old white guys (I’m convinced at this point that they just hang their female writer on a coat hanger so they can point to her whenever someone says that their staff is too male-dominated) treat their female biracial lead with such disrespect, and I can only presume that the mistreatment of Luka is because he’s supportive of her and they don’t like that, meaning that the way she’s treated ends up rubbing off on him.

It doesn’t come off as a fun or interesting plot; it comes off as cruel. When Adrien is sad, he usually gets people rushing to comfort him (”Party Crasher,” “Gamer”), but “Truth” has Marinette in tears over the fact that she can’t have a boyfriend due to being Ladybug and the writing has the gall to crack jokes about Kaalki not knowing what tears are, and then Marinette has to ask for the kwami to hug her for comfort.

When Luka gets akumatized into Truth, the episode doesn’t even hesitate at bashing away at him, from everyone saying that Marinette’s secret is that she “loves Adrien” (which, as Truth points out, isn’t a secret, and they could’ve had this somehow lead up to a twist ending where Marinette actually isn’t into Adrien anymore and the Adrien pictures were genuinely for reference, but she stammered about it because it was embarrassing that her boyfriend got sent it with no context) to one of Luka’s favorite songs actually being about how Jagged abandoned him to go on tour. Luka has to deal with Marinette ditching him constantly (not that I blame her) and not knowing who his father is despite wanting to know, and the episode treats him like trash for... what? Having a crush on a girl who’s secretly Ladybug? Because that’s all it seems to come down to in the end.

I also have serious gripes with the fact that Marinette has this huge schedule established in “Gamer 2.0″ and they don’t even try to explain why she can’t use it to keep track of her obligations. The episode has her say (in a roundabout way but still) that she’s forgetting stuff constantly because of all of her emergencies (the emergencies of which are not stated and I hate the subtle implication that forgetting something means you don’t care about it when that’s clearly not how things work and also not what Marinette comes off as because - again - they establish that she’s overworked) but fails to properly explain it. The episode hammers away at Marinette having all these issues and even has Tikki chide Marinette by asking her about leaving Luka alone while apparently neglecting the fact that Marinette HAS to go be Ladybug right now and what else is there to even do??

Both Luka and Marinette are punished for just having a crush and wanting to be together and I hate that the episode forces a break-up instead of coming up with a solution to the problem. Instead of “Marinette isn’t ready for a romantic relationship,” it feels more like she’s just not allowed to be happy.

Long-distance relationships are a thing. Relationships where people don’t get to go on dates frequently are a thing. Instead of forcing a break-up, the episode could’ve had a lesson/development where Marinette is told that she’s allowed to pursue a relationship and just needs to plan accordingly. but they just didn’t want to.

For example: instead of planning dates, Marinette could wait until an akuma/sentimonster is defeated to call Luka and ask him out, because Hawk Moth usually doesn’t strike immediately after one is dealt with. I’m positive that Luka would happily take impromptu/sudden dates over planned-but-inconsclusive ones. Heck, they don’t even have to date specifically and can just stick to phone calls (kwami can’t be picked up on technology) or hanging out in Marinette’s room/on Marinette’s balcony while they do their thing.

Relationships are a commitment, but that doesn’t mean they have to be a burden, and the episode absolutely drags Marinette over it. The whole thing with the kwami being released and stressing her out when they’re not supposed to be able to just come out normally is explained away by, “oh, the new box must be like you, Marinette; full of surprises!” when the reality is just that the show wants to take away everything that’s sacred to Marinette. The Season 3 finale had Fu’s letter telling Marinette that “life doesn’t always give you what you want, but the real gift is life itself,” then proceeds to turn Marinette’s life into a living hell.

Her room? She has to say good-bye to her privacy because now the kwami are always going to be around. The first thing one of them (Trixx) did was start reading her diary, showing that they have absolutely no shame or regard for Marinette’s feelings.

Her schedule? Conveniently pops away into the realm of non-existence so she can look bad for ditching Chat Noir on patrol and neglecting dates with Luka due to her responsibilities/stress.

Her boyfriend, the one person in the entire show who loved her, respected her agency, never judged her, actually apologized when he made her sad, and who she was genuinely in love with rather than just having the equivalent of a celebrity crush for? She had to break up with him because plot and needing to force her to go back to fawning over the guy who has only made her life worse by her crushing on him.

When I say the universe hates Marinette, this is what I mean. It created random akuma to attack Paris all for the sake of forcing Marinette away from Luka, and apparently didn’t realize what they were doing in the scene where Marinette hurries back to the Liberty when Kitty Section and Adrien are playing together when Adrien is Chat Noir so he should’ve been late too.

(Oh, and Marinette completely ignores Adrien in favor of waving at Luka and even tells Luka outright that Adrien isn’t even a factor in their relationship issues, further proving the “multiple drafts smashed together” and “the Adrien name drops are pointless” points.)

The whole thing in “Backwarder” where it was basically outright stated that Marianne could’ve been Fu’s confidant had Marianne not been outed by Ladybug’s mistake? Completely forgotten and left to the wayside. Marinette could’ve told Luka that she was watching the Miracle Box in Ladybug’s place (for any number of reasons, really: either Ladybug thinks it’s too dangerous to keep with her, or if the public doesn’t know that Ladybug is guardian, then Marinette can just say that she’s guardian) and that she has to run off to keep guard of the Miracle Box when an akuma/sentimonster happens in case Ladybug needs a miraculous.

Boom, done, episode solved. Luka gets to help Marinette with the kwami, Marinette is less stressed because someone knows half of her secret, and Luka and Marinette continue to date but are able to plan around akuma attacks.

But no. That whole thing in “Backwarder” where guardians (or at least Fu) can have a confidant was just there so Marinette could feel guilty about screwing it all up, because she’s not able to take advantage of that perk herself.

How convenient.

[hes-writer]

Errors

Summary; harry comes over for dinner

Warnings: angst and fluff for this one

Word Count: 3234 words

A/N: possibly the last part of the Tarnish series. Thank you for all the support that you have given me and @devilinbetweenthesheet-s. This was a month worth of work and I cannot believe that I was actually consistent with the updates (except for this one, which is 2 days late lol). 

Read till the end for a sneak peek of part 6!!

This is Part Five of the Tarnish series.

____

Harry felt out of place.

As a world-renowned pop star, he was used to being paid a different kind of attention in most of the places he went to. He should be used to it. Harry had to take measures in order not to get recognized for stepping into a local coffee shop. Even in hot weather, his recognizable tattoos gave easy access for fans to whisper amongst each other, wondering if it was the right time to ask for a photo or merely share a conversation with him. 

 His voice--the thing that made him as famous as he is now--was tinted into his fans’ heads. Recognition blaring in their ears when the deep, gruff tone projected the open air. It would be quite disturbing if he had to change the pitch for everyday errands. Harry would rather feel out of place than go to extremes to change who he was. 

 This lifestyle was something that he was used to, having been under the scrutiny of the public eye for a little over a decade now. But Harry knew that Y/N was a small, town girl practically bickered and poked until she was forced to cough something out to taint Harry’s name in vain. From the way, he preferred sniffing his nose into a hanky instead of a Kleenex. The way he snored loudly when his nostrils felt dry. The way his hair isn’t as naturally curly as it appears to be. All of these things were the borderline crossing of his privacy that she could’ve taken to the press, urging in many articles written about his odd habits or preferences.

 Not that he thought Y/N was that type of person to spill secrets in the midst of desperation, but Harry had cheated on her for God’s sake. If she did run her mouth, Harry wouldn’t blame her. He was horrible to her; cheated on her for a year, not even bothering to tell Y/N that his affection was teetering in favour of not hurting her and wanting to keep his side relationship a secret for a taste of adrenaline that came with his less-than boring life. 

 Harry left her alone while she was going through a life-changing period of her life. To be fair, Y/N didn’t actually tell him. She tried, but the message never reached his cognition. Harry wanted to save his salvation by choosing to believe that it was her fault for not visiting him in person to tell him the news. 

 Really though, how could Harry possibly know about her pregnancy if she didn’t make the effort to inform him of his own child. It wasn’t like he was supposed to check in on her, his ex-girlfriend, right? That was unheard of. And frankly, Harry thought that the day everything blew up--when she read the letter meant for Camille; Y/N made it very clear that she did not want to speak to him again. So really, Harry was just respecting her wishes. 

 Y/N was supposed to be the one feeling out of place; not Harry. If only she had told him when she identified the symptoms of pregnancy, he could have helped out. Harry wasn’t sure if he would have left Camille to begin a family with Y/N (if she took him back) or if he was only a parent of support. One that was there for the sake of raising a child but not sharing the means and affection to build a relationship with Y/N. 

 These were Harry’s thoughts as he sat with the family of three. In between Y/N and Connor as they sat on opposite ends of the round table with baby Halo in her high chair and Harry across from her. Halo was staring at him with wonder and curiosity; a shy type of look that tinted her cheeks a tad rosy and her lashes to peer at the man adjacent to her, wondering why he was joining them in their family dinner. 

 Harry felt out of place.

___

 “What’s wrong, baby?” Connor asked, feeding the child a spoonful of peas. “Not usually like this,” She shook her head, tucking her arms together and pursing her lips inwards in a sign of rejection. 

 Halo looked at Y/N who was giving her a soft smile, then to Harry. “She’s not usually like this. She must be shy that you’re here tonight, Harry,” Y/N explained, a tone of indifference that she tried to mask to help Halo feel a little more comfortable. 

 Harry gulped heavily. His child was uncomfortable because of him. He almost felt guilty for wanting to scoop her up and canoodle Halo in his arms. Harry still hadn’t had the chance to do that. 

___

 When the door opened earlier this evening, Harry was met by Y/N’s furrowed brows, firmly reminding him that this dinner was for him to be slowly introduced into Halo’s life. Harry would get the chance to care for her by helping the child with her nighttime routine. That included brushing her teeth, tucking her in, a bedtime story and possibly a kiss on the forehead. 

 Harry was giddy, to say the least. Harry was confident with kids and could easily mould into what they needed. If they wanted him to pretend to be a car while they jumped on his back as they grasped onto his curls to steer him, he would. If Harry was instructed to be a pretty princess with a plastic tiara on his head, he would exaggeratedly lift a pinky up to play the part. It was easy for him to win the hearts of his little nieces and nephews because they were familiar with him. They knew him as ‘Uncle Harry’ who gave them gifts whenever he came over to visit or if there was a large family reunion.

 He couldn’t exactly do that with Halo. She was familiar with him, yes. However, the one time they interacted, Harry had made her cry. It didn’t sit right with him that tears sprung from her corneas when she was only trying to make him feel better, sensing that her parents wanted nothing to do with him.

 It wasn’t like Harry knew what she liked either. Did Halo like playing with dolls? Animals? Race cars? The most basic of things, Harry didn’t know. What was her favourite colour? When was her birthday? His resumé was already tarnished since he wasn’t present when her mother fell pregnant. Then, he missed her first steps, her first words. He was just a stranger to her.

 And it showed from the way he stepped foot into the kitchen.

 Harry heard her before he saw her. Tiny squeals and giggles fell from her mouth as Connor chased her around with plates grasped in his hands. Y/N had scolded the man for getting distracted instead of setting the table. Halo’s noises quieting down when she caught sight of the familiar yet unfamiliar man loitering the doorway.

 “‘M sorry, love. Halo wanted to play,” Connor gripped her waist to pull Y/N closer to him, pressing a kiss to her cheek as she fought off a smile from splintering her face. “Right, cutie?”

 “Wanted to play! Sowwy mama,’ Halo apologized, tugging on her pant leg. 

 That was when Harry realized the possibility of ruining the little family they had in the words. But this was supposed to be his in the first place so he couldn’t care less if he wrecked it. As selfish as it may be, Harry thought that there was meaning in him accidentally hearing Gemma’s conversation with Y/N. Sure, it was bound to happen, but it couldn’t have come at a better time. The hole in his heart caused by Camille’s confession of not wanting kids was growing each day, accentuated by the late-night trip to the grocery store and seeing the small baby clothes that took up half of his palm. 

 It was a sign, right? He felt like he was drowning in a relationship that had no future and the next day, he was met with Y/N and their baby. 

___

 Symbolism. As a writer, it was absolutely crucial to introduce some sort of word, item, place, or person and infuse it with impeccable meaning. Irrefutable to the point that that noun is and will be what the writer makes of it. 

 Round tables were supposed to be better at sprouting conversations than rectangular or square tables. Any conversation between a pair must be shared with everybody who sat around it. There was no room to quietly snicker or ration secrets. Yet somehow that theory was not working. At all.

 Harry felt like an intruder sitting in a table that never held more than three people because it was always just them: Y/N, Connor and Halo. As the child got more comfortable with his presence, she slowly started babbling incoherent and coherent words alike, conversing with her ‘parents’ as they asked her about her day at daycare. Y/N asked about Connor’s day at work and the latter reciprocated the question which she was currently answering. 

 “It wasn’t as busy as I thought,” Y/N shrugged her shoulders, forking a piece of mash. Connor made a sound of recognition, “S’that why you texted me to go home instead?”

 Y/N nodded, helping Halo scoop her own forkful of mash, “Yep, I had time to go to the store. I know that you were swarmed at work,” The couple allotted a loving glance towards each other. 

 Harry’s heart was cracking. He was witnessing what he could have had and He had a front-row seat to it. Was it jealousy? Maybe. He was in a relationship so he shouldn’t feel like swarming Y/N’s smaller frame in his arms, shielding her and baby Halo away from Connor. But he did.

 “What about you, Harry?” Connor questioned him with a kink to his brow. Harry could tell that the question wasn’t sincere, purely out of consideration. 

 In a surprise, Harry coughed a little, reaching out to his cloth to dab the corners of his mouth. Truth to be told, Harry spent the day in a state of anxiety. From the moment he woke up, Harry could feel his chest expanding with nervousness, heart beating loudly and pounding in his ears. He picked at the skin of his lip in the wonder of what he was going to wear. If he should wear cologne or if it will irritate Halo’s senses. He spent the better half of the morning browsing online for toys he could get in a hurry to give to Halo. 

 Harry contemplated cancelling the dinner because of the uneasy feeling boiling in his stomach. Heightened senses and pinched nerves convinced Harry that he could feel the muscles of his esophagus contracted as he swallowed. Lungs punctured with the tip of the pen he was using to scrawl a list of ideas to build a bond with his daughter

 “It was alright,” Harry said warily, “Didn’t really have anythin’ to do today except come here,” 

 Y/N pulled her head back in surprise, “Sorry, we ruined your day off,” 

 His eyes widened immediately. Harry’s usual aura of confidence nowhere to be seen, “N-no, no. I didn’t mean it like that,” He could feel stray curls hitting his cheekbones lightly. “I jus’-- it’s m’break so I haven’t got anything for the next couple of months,”

___

 Harry’s settled nerves were awoken when it was time to clean up. Y/N insisted on doing the dishes with Connor while Harry bonded with Halo. 

 “Remember, you’re doing this for her,” Y/N whispered in his ear, causing shivers to crawl up his spine, “Don’t be nervous, Harry. She’s going to love you,” She added, seeing the way he blinked warily at Halo and Connor. Even going as far as giving him a comforting smile. 

 “Thank you, Y/N--for giving me this,” She nodded in response, jutting her chin downwards.

 “Hawwy? Mama said you gonna help me get to bed?” Halo’s green eyes still shone despite the dim kitchen lighting, reminding Harry that this was his and Y/N’s creation. Throughout the dinner, the child had somehow warmed up to Harry’s presence. With a promise of an ice cream trip after her nursery classes earlier in the morning, Halo was quick to befriend the man who she pointed out: ‘has the same dimple as me!’--while poking a stubby finger to her plush cheek, grinning to showcase it. 

 Harry could feel his heart thud, crouching down to her level, worried of her straining her neck looking up at his tall stature. “Tha’s right. Wanna show me where the bathroom is?” She nodded, grabbing Harry’s index finger to drag him along, exerting his lumbar to keep his height low. He could feel Halo’s feet stumbling, keeping her balance by tightening her grip on Harry. 

 Their time in the bathroom was fairly short. Halo had learned to brush her teeth by herself. She only needed Harry to guide her up the stool so that she could reach the sink, spitting the foam from her mouth when Harry made a funny face in the mirror, giggling loudly that had Harry’s chest feeling light. 

 As they walked through the hallway, Harry couldn’t help but let his ears be numb to Halo’s babbling about her favourite stuffed toy. He didn’t mean to. Instead, his neck craned to the door left agape, assuming that it was Connor and Y/N’s with the way the Gucci shoes that Harry had bought her were neatly placed at the bottom of the foot of the bed. He stared down at his moving feet, mood souring despite the bright colours of his loafers imprinted in a little rainbow--the same ones that he just caught sight off and wavered just as quickly.

 “You like it?”

 He snapped out of his thoughts when Halo climbed on her tiny bed, clutching her favourite stuffed toy. Harry plastered a beaming grin on his face, inspecting the painted room, the small desk pushed against the wall and the numerous artworks taped to almost every surface. 

 One, in particular, had his heart aching more so than it already was.

 It was a hand-drawn stick figure portrait of Y/N, Halo, and Connor. Harry couldn’t even pretend that the skinny, stretched black marker was him because the child messily penned Connor’s name underneath. The figures were holding each others’ hands, oblong faces paired with a curved mouth shaped upwards. It didn’t help that the title at the top was “My Famli” which was crossed over with a red marker and re-titled underneath as “My Family” in neat handwriting that Harry could recognize as Y/N’s. 

 “Hawwy?” She repeated, wondering why he was staring so hard at the drawing taped on her bedside table. Her brows furrowed when a drop of tear fell from his eye and landed on Connor’s head, smudging the ink and making it blurry disarray as Halo gasped. “Oh no!”

 “‘M s-sorry, Halo,” Harry’s tongue felt too thick in his mouth, sobbing threatening to escape but he remembered how that would make his daughter feel. Halo placed her soft hand on top of his.

 “It’s okay, Hawwy. I can do it again,” Her timid voice made his heart flutter. Halo didn’t want Harry to cry again and it looked like he was about to so she scurried in planting her shaky legs on the floor. A blank paper was already stable on her desk, grabbing a marker to draw the ruined project again. She could see Harry’s shadow towering over her, thanks to the light projected by her lamp. 

 Flipping the paper over, Halo giggled, “Go away! Y’cant see it till it’s done,” She used her force to push him backwards which wasn’t a lot so Harry walked backwards until the back of his calves hit her bed frame. “Stay there and play with Honey,”

 As she got back to work, Harry searched for ‘Honey’, finding an oatmeal coloured bear with a pot of honey clutched between its threaded paws. He stared at the plush toy for what felt like forever, wondering how special this must be to her. And how Harry wasn’t the one to have given it to her.

 “Done!” Halo’s timidness returned, hiding the paper behind her back yet Harry heard the slight crumple. 

 Placing the stuffed toy on the bed, he asked, “Are y’gonna show me?” 

 She handed the artwork to Harry while he watched, smiling softly. Halo slapped her palms on her cheeks when Harry turned it over, his breath hitching when he saw the extra figure that she had drawn. 

 Harry. With a head of wild curls and dotted green eyes that appeared more black with the lighting.

 He couldn’t help it when happy tears seared his waterline which Halo mistook for complacence. “You don’t. . .like it Hawwy?”

 “I-I do. I love it, honey,” Harry admitted, chuckling slightly as he patted his upper thigh. She climbed onto the bed with him, the wood creaking beneath Harry’s weight. Halo clumsily climbed on his lap, lifting his heavy forearm so she could sneak between his legs. 

 Harry could feel his nonexistent double chin crowding his neck as he looked down at Halo who was cuddled to his chest, lips turned into a pout, looking at her quick-minute work. “I like it cause you’re there,” She pointed at the ice cream in Harry’s hand before yawning loudly. 

 “You’re sleepy, baby Halo?’

 She nodded, pressing a small hand on his chest. Harry took the initiative to lay the child down on her pillow despite every nerve in his body urging him to stay in that position. But Harry figured that he had probably overstayed his welcome for the night. 

 Harry pressed a passionate kiss to her forehead, caressing her head gently. Sleep eyes stared at him as he pulled her fleece blanket to her chin. “Stay?” She questioned, fists crumpling to clutched the end of the fabric.

 “I can’t, bub,” He informed with regret, shaking his head sadly and his mouth curved downwards. His knee was sore with weight pressed on his knee cap and his lumbar was aching with how he crouched down one too many times this evening, but all pain seemed to disappear when Halo picked up Honey the Teddy Bear from beside her and gave it to Harry. “For me? Thank you,”

 Halo laid back down on her bed, “Mhm,”

 “Why?”

 As a two-year-old, Halo could only say so many words, yet her thoughts went far deeper than her brain could comprehend. That she felt a profound attachment to Harry despite seeing him twice. How pleasant it was to spend even just a small amount of time with him. Harry was nice and gave her forehead kisses and rubbed her head that placed a smile on her face. He cried because he loved her artwork and he apologized when he did something wrong. He contorted his lips into a silly face to make her laugh. He was going to be picking her up from school and Harry said he was going to buy her ice cream tomorrow! 

 “I dunno,” Halo shrugged, peering downwards to avoid eye contact. Harry chuckled heartily, puckering his pink lips to another peck on her forehead, and then both of her cheeks. 

____

let us know what you thought!! Part 6 aka Ruin is already up on Patreon!

RUIN - SNEAK PEEK

“Hate to remind you but Harry left you once before, don’t think he’ll hesitate to do so again,”

She froze at Connor’s words. Y/N was aware that he only said that in good faith, to remind her of how hurt she was at the time and just how long it took for her to be able to finally breathe again. 

One side of Y/N urged to still defend Harry. She wanted to turn and around, yell at him because Connor doesn’t know Harry as she does. Harry wasn’t the type to build a child’s dreams up only for him to personally manhandle the heart and crush it in his fist. There was a reason why he was a godfather to so many kids; Ruby, Arlo and Jackson—because he was capable. Harry was a nurturing father who put himself on the back burner in favour of making sure that the little ones were safe and secured. He had no problem being third if it meant that the kids were first, then Y/N, then him. 

It all sounded so good in Y/N’s head; so well-rehearsed and very well thought out. The monologue that had somehow stuck in the sides of her brain like a script taped to the wall, ready for the time it needed to be recited. The shredded pieces of paper also reminded her that Y/N might’ve known Harry before, but she certainly doesn’t anymore. In fact, she knew just as much as Connor did.

Just like Y/N had grown and evolved into a new person, Harry was not the same guy he once was when they were together. 

“I told him the consequences if he did,” 

Connor pulled back, stepping away from her. “But wouldn’t it be better if we didn’t take that chance? Who knows what he might do. . .” He trailed off, grabbing a dry rag to wipe the water dripping from the dish. 

____

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[sunlightwoo]

Going High

☀︎ pairing: sunwoo x reader

☀︎ genre: summer fling au,  fluff, some angst, theme is kinda like the one that got away type of thing?

☀︎ wc: 1.7k

☀︎ plot: summer flings are meant to be flings, nothing more than what it should’ve been known for. however you somehow found yourself reminiscing all those times that you have encountered the red headed boy that always took your breath away at the beach house you find yourself going to whenever you wanted a breather from the hard life you endured.

☀︎ a/n: before i say anything else and forget, there is a section between the breaks that is all italicized and in quotes!! that’s just a long dialogue of sunwoo’s pov of their relationship from the cassette tape. secondly: i hope that you guys liked this piece even though i feel as though it wasn’t my best HOGSJNGshuo it was really fun writing this though and would like to thank @atbzkingdom​​ for hosting the lovely collab with the other amazing writers in it!! be sure to check out everyone’s works as well in the link to the collab masterlist!!

collab masterlist | my tbz masterlist

The smell of the salty beach air fills your nose as the sun is slowly setting in the scenery in front of your eyes, your own body slightly leaning against the railing that was underneath your arms on the balcony at your beach house. You think that this might be the one place that you could call your comfort space.

Memories of being in the exact spot over the years come to mind as you reminisced all of them, wondering how long it has been since you had last been here. Was it a year? Maybe three?

You decide to head back into your room when you notice something sticking out from the floorboard that you didn’t notice earlier. Walking over towards it, you looked to see that there was a box that was visibly hidden underneath the floorboard, making you lean down to take it out from the loose wood and bring it out to your lap.

Opening it up while sitting on the floor, you noticed the various polaroids and notes that were in there along with a cassette tape that was taped against the box. You looked at it in confusion, not knowing where it had originated from or what it could’ve contained but you assumed it had once belonged to you in the past.

Getting up to play it on the cassette player that was on your desk, you carefully inserted it and plugged in your headphones before pressing play, waiting for whatever audio to appear as you flipped through the familiar polaroids. Brinks of red paint your eyes as you wonder who the red headed male in the photos with you were, your mind looking for the answers that you had needed when suddenly a deep voice interrupts you from your thoughts.

“Hey sweetheart, did you miss me?”

Your eyes widened as it finally clicked in your head who it was, hearing the evident smirk in his voice mirroring the one that you were staring at in one of the polaroids. Kim Sunwoo, better known to be your first love, as you can recall clearly from your past memories. He was the one person that happened to be your escapist from the real world after the many times you sought out this house as your getaway from your family and school.

“By the time that you’re listening to this, it must’ve been a while then since I never told you about this tape.”

He was right.

The last time that you saw him was back in 2017, which was roughly four years from how much you could remember. That was your last year of college, and you could remember all of the days that you had spent with him, endless mornings and starry nights that you stayed up for and got away from the reality that you had faced when you left him.

You wonder if he was doing well without you, knowing that you were the one that left him first.

“I don’t think I’m doing okay without you, sweetheart,” His voice vibrates from a pitied chuckle that left his chest as you could feel your heart clench in your chest at how sad his smile must’ve been while recording this.

“You were asking a lot when you told me to wait for you when you’ve finally answered my question from that night. Do you still remember it?”

“Of course I do,” You say out loud as if he were with you right now to hear your response, and you were brought back to the last memories of him that year before you left him once again.

“I hated myself for it because of how much I had hurt you, Sunwoo.”

“I remember the first time that we had met at the beach house. You thought that I was an intruder, when I had only come over to welcome you into the area knowing that the previous owners of it happened to be your distant family members.

There were tales that they used to tell me before you had arrived, different praises and stories that made you seem as though you were a cold person that only kept their nose into a book for fun. However, I think it was that first night where you had proven me wrong by being the complete opposite of what I had assumed of you.

And I think that’s when I might’ve fallen in love with you.

From all the nights that we spent stargazing, to all the times we messed around in the early mornings of sunrise by slashing water at the shorelines, to the campfires with the boys that we’d whisper our secrets to… I think I knew that I had fallen in love with you that night when we kissed under the moonlight of a full moon… until you had asked me about playing a game.

The long game, sweetheart… I think that was one of the dumbest things I’ve ever heard from your mouth, considering you were, ya know, the smarter one. You knew that I loved you in that moment, and I think that was the reason why you pushed me away from getting even closer to you by wanting to keep in touch with you after you leave this time around.

Was it something that I shouldn’t have done?

You haven’t been here in over a year now, and I miss you, sweetheart. Maybe I should’ve just let you go and keep whatever we had a summer fling, but I can’t help but wonder if you ever felt the same sparks that I felt every time we came close with one another.

That’s my question to you, in which I just want to know the simple answer to.

I don’t care how long it may take to get your answer, whether it be months after hearing this, or a couple years. Hell you can be married already, and I’d rather just let it be told that it was just me that had felt all the highs and the warm feelings of being free whenever we were together.

You already know where to find me, Y/N… and I’ll be waiting there whenever you figure it out on your own terms.

The moment that you hear the sound of a click of the cassette player finally stopping, you realized that your cheeks were wet as you moved your hand back up to wipe the tears away from your face. You couldn’t tell when you started to cry, but you sat in your chair while staring at the sunset that was setting outside of your balcony, thinking about the available choices that you were given in the moment that you were in.

For one part of your heart, there was the fear of him just being a fling that scared you; the fact that he was the one person that you had always relied on every summer when you came to get relief and happened to be available at the time. However, you also pondered about how much love you had felt with him, knowing that you had never been able to find someone like him in the reality of your world that had loved you the way that he did, made you feel as though you were high on cloud nine the way that he had.

Getting up from your chair almost abruptly, you grabbed your phone and made your way out to the familiar cliffs that weren’t too far away from the beach house.  The entire time that you had speed walked over to them had been filled with nervous thoughts and many ways to come up with the right words to say if he were to be there.

You weren’t even sure if he was still going to be there in the first place, cause you felt as though you had waited for too long in order to find the answer to the question.

You make it to the cliffs and get a better view of the sunset that was behind the horizons of the ocean, eyes darting across the waters when footsteps are made from behind you. Your heart is pounding in your chest as you hoped that maybe you weren’t just hearing things; if the person that was close was actually him, you weren’t sure what to say to him because of the lump that was caught in your throat.

“It took you long enough to find your answer.” You hear the person say and turn around slowly to see him once again, this time a coat of black painting his hair as it was no longer the bright red you were used to.

There’s a breath that escapes from your lips as you stare at him in a feeling that was similar to relief with the way that he stood in front of you with his hands in his jean pockets. Clad in a simple white tee like you remember seeing before in your polaroids, the small smirk that was so familiar to your heart and eyes was still painted across his lips as he raises an eyebrow at your somewhat disheveled figure.

“Am I too late?” You whisper, watching as he walks over towards you with an amused look and takes your hands into his before placing a chaste kiss on them and then on your lips slightly, making you relish in the memories of you kissing him all those years ago.

He pulls away slightly, eyes bored right into yours as the loud pounding in your chest was evident from how fast your heart was beating, and you had a feeling that he was able to feel it too. However, you were somewhat elated that he was here in front of you again, ready to hear your answer after years of waiting and you wonder if he’d still keep those same feelings just as you did for him.

“Not one second later,” He grins as he held a pinky up in front of you both with a teasing grin on his face just seconds before looping it with your own, “Are we finally done playing the long game?”

“Yeah… We’re finished playing, and my answer is that I love you too.”

[fireemblems24]

Post Grondor Field AM Analysis

I'm prefacing this by saying that I'm still not sure I can write a good analysis of this scene for two reasons:

1. I don't know what comes after, and

2. I'm very emotionally involved in what happened.

But I tried my best. One thing is for sure though, what happened in Grondor in AM was an incredibly significant turning point for AM and Dimitri and my thoughts and analysis on it will definitely expand as I keep writing about and playing the game.

Part of me is just so happy I got to see Dimitri's supports, have the inevitable turn around, and get to do things like tea and dinner time again that it's hard to be objective about this scene.

And by "this scene," I don't mean that actual fight at Grondor, but everything from Fleche's attack to Byleth's words in the rain later.

It wasn't all about Byleth . . .

Given how poignant Dimitri's character arc has been so far, I had a deep rooted fear player-pandering would ruin it. Byleth, as a concept, isn't bad, but too often the heaps of praise feel underserved and other things (like Claude's intelligence, Edelgard's relationships with everyone else) get ignored to make more room for player-pandering.

Thankfully this did not happen. Byleth, throughout the early chapters of AM's part 2, failed to reach Dimitri. And, honestly, seeing Byleth actually struggle for once has done wonders for how I view her character. Still, I worried that player-pandering-power, rather than something that felt earned, would cause the inevitable eye-opener for Dimitri.

But it wasn't just Byleth. Fleche's vengeance kicked everything off, what veered Dimitri away from his fate in other routes. He accepted his death at her hands, not bothering to defend himself. Rodrigue stepping in the way and his parting words forced Dimitri to confront things he'd ignored. Throughout AM so far, people have posed questions to Dimitri who refused to answer them because he didn't want to face what they asked. But Rodrigue dying for him, spending his final words telling Dimitri to live for himself - combined with Fleche's attack - forced Dimitri to confront things he avoided. It wasn't until after all of that when Byleth steps in.

And Byleth didn't "fix" him either. Dimitri's supports show a young man who's still very much struggling with his mental health, poor self-image, his previous actions, and wondering if he deserves not only to live for himself - but if he even deserves to live. Byleth didn't hand-wave Dimitri's problems away.

Everything about the scene is stronger because it didn't fall back on player-pandering, but more earned, realistic, and dramatic actions and consequences - including Byleth's involvement which felt far more earned than usual because of prior failure.

But I wish Dimitri's friends played a bigger role.

Not everything was perfect though. I wish we got a little more than we did from Dimitri's house mates - especially his childhood friends Sylvain, Ingrid, and extra special mention to Felix and especially, especially Dedue.

Throughout all of AM, none of the above mentioned characters feel utilized to their full potential. This isn't a problem exclusive to AM, and by all means it's far from the biggest offender, but given how close all the ties are in AM, it's felt when it's not there.

I still don't know what exactly I would've done with them. Maybe I'd need to make the game an actual novel to do it, and you can't forget how perma-death has historically held back games at times, limiting major moments to a select few "retreat" candidates.

Still, though, getting a bit more from Ingrid, Sylvain, Felix, and Dedue would've made the scene even more powerful.

I actually really liked the scene in the rain.

I haven't made it a secret that I dislike Byleth. Or maybe disliked is more accurate. Lately I've been rethinking my stance on Byleth, in part because I've heard from people who like her or found ways to make her work and from my own thinking about the game while planning future write ups.

I don't think it's Byleth I really dislike, but the player-pandering. Separating the two isn't easy, but it's easier since I've starting coming around to seeing Byleth as her own character.

There's been a few moments that made me care for Byleth, and this scene in the rain was one of them. Because she didn't just fix everything. She tried and failed for months to reason with Dimitri, and despite everything she never gave up on him or failed to keep offering her hand.

I'm not going to lie. I got all the bubbly, heartwarming, heartbreaking feels the writers wanted me to in this scene. Seeing Byleth reach for something and fail, and then finally, finally get through was rewarding in a way many of Byleth's prior accomplishments aren't because this one felt earned. And by God did she earn it.

Some people will likely disagree with that last point, but I disagree with them. She asked Dimitri hard-hitting questions, forcing him to come to unpleasant conclusions rather than trying to force him into anything. She kept Dimitri from veering to far off course, even at expense to herself when she killed Randolph. She saved Dimitri from Fleche when he refused to save himself. She quietly supported him, coaxing out the good she knew was still there and refused to give up on.

I'd never in a million years say someone in real life should put up with Dimitri's toxic behavior and verbal abuse, even considering his extreme trauma and aggravated mental illness. But seeing someone fuck up so badly still get forgiven, still get supported, still struggle but honestly change for the good, still get loved, start to accept and forgive himself through the power of love and forgiveness from others is very powerful, especially since media so often downplays those "softer" things as weakness in comparison to the "badassery" of ambition and stoicism. Using Byleth, who previously had little experience with feelings, who was encouraged to experience them in healthy ways by Dimitri, return the favor isn't really the worst choice.

It's cliche, but cliches aren't always bad.

The mentor dies. Redemption in the rain. Revenge against the protagonist's actions opens their eyes. Etc . . . This scene was chuck full of cliches, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

Tropes serve an important narrative purpose because a writer can rely on them to convey a message to the audience that either saves time or sets them up for something unexpected or even expected. Fire Emblem has always and will always be incredibly cliche and full of tropes. It loves tropes so much there's in-universe ones that make some unit or character discussions sound like a foreign language to people outside of or new to the fandom, talking about "Ests" and calling someone a "Camus."

What matters is if a story pulled something off well, not if it's terribly unique. A mentor dying is powerful because it forces the student to grow. Redemption in the rain is high symbolic of water washing things away + the somber atmosphere rain creates. Someone trying to get revenge against a character provides an eye-opening experience about the ripple effect of their actions. We see these things in fiction all the time because they work.

All the tropes worked like expected in this scene. Using images instead of cut scenes did make less of an impact, but more on that later.

Tl;dr: There's nothing unexpected or terribly unique about what happened. It was honestly painfully predictable, but that doesn't make it bad and is in a series that does this all of the time.

The voice acting carried because those images can't.

A major downside to this scene is that it used vague images instead of a cut scene. I get that budget and time were likely concerns, but many cut scenes from earlier in the game seem rather trivial. Did we really need that dance one? Really? I don't think so.

This was a hugely important, action heavy moment. Using one or two still images to convey everything that's happening and all those emotions, really makes it less than it could've been.

That said, the voice acting saves it. I've raved about how amazing Chris Hackeny is as Dimitri, so nothing new here. Rodrigue's and Fleche's VAs also did a fantastic job. No one oversold or undersold the emotions. Even without the cut scene, you felt what happened thanks to the skill of the actors. This scene would've been so much harder to engage with without them, if this was an older FE game where all you got was text. This is 100% one of the moments highly elevated by the decision to have a fully voiced game and choosing high caliber talent (let's not talk about Radiant Dawn's voice acting).

Questionable support timing.

One issue I had came right after the scene when I viewed Dimitri's supports. The nature of some - like his with Raphael and Alois - didn't quite line up with the character I saw in dialogue right after. I wish they staggered them a bit more or got picker about what you could get in part 1 or 2.

This isn't limited to Dimitri either. In the same support batch, I also got a Marianne B support where she still had no confidence or self-worth. And then like 10 minutes later I talk to her in the monastery and she mentions about how seeing all the death in Grondor made her value her life even more.

In the past, I've also received entirely valid opinions that Dorothea in part 2 is hard to understand because she's cherry and flirty in her supports, and morose and hates the war in her monastery stuff, making her seem inconsistent.

It's a bit jarring. It's not really an issue for characters who don't change much like Edelgard or Raphael, but even for characters with more subtle differences than Dimitri, Marianne, and Dorothea - like, say, Lorenz - you get a lot of weird stuff because of supports. I just think Dimitri's stands out because he's a main character with a really prominent, important turning point for his growth.

[theravennest]

Thoughts on Ep. 11 of Not Me.

**Spoilers Below**

The way Gram just...disappeared after the shootout even though Gumpa was out here bringing everyone to Dan’s studio. Except, I guess, Gram...the one who went with Gumpa after the shootout in the first place. 

He wasn’t even there for the confab with Black and Dan because he was “out getting food.” Like, they could’ve just not done that and had him in the scene with very few changes to the scene.

At this stage, what is even the point of his character???? The writers keep losing him in the mix. It’s like when he’s not on screen, he doesn’t exist for them (and for me, tbh). 

I’ve never really cared much about Black and Gram as a romantic ship but I was open to the possibility of it if it happened. 

But, controversial opinion I guess, I’ve always been far more intrigued by the Black and Eugene romantic and post-romantic relationship dynamic. (I’m a sucker for a good exes storyline.) 

I’m also more interested in seeing Black be confronted by Eugene about his fairly infantilizing and condescending attitude in assuming she couldn’t “handle” knowing the truth about his vigilantism or in thinking that he has to “protect” her by pushing her away. An attitude he also employs with White. Because the show has yet to address this underlying hypocrisy in Black when it comes to Eugene even though his goal is to fight for equality and justice. I’m certain the show will address some of this with White and Black’s relationship but I’m far less certain the show will let Eugene vent to Black about the same thing, unfortunately. 

I fear that the show is not ready to confront the subtle misogyny/bias in this part of it’s own narrative. I’ve been feeling it a bit ever since I understood that not a single woman is involved in the vigilante gang so far even though Namo especially would’ve very easily fit within the team with only some slight changes to her character arc. Eugene could’ve been folded into the gang later or become a source of support for them outside of vigilantism after confronting Black on his bullshit. (Fingers crossed that something like this still happens in the last 3 eps.)

Nuch could’ve probably fit within the team too but I actually like that she serves in the narrative as an audience surrogate instead. She is an activist who uses other methods (methods that most viewers can also take part in irl) to fight injustice such as community organization, public protests, voting, lobbying, etc. I think Nuch’s POV there is actually quite vital to the story so I probably wouldn’t change that much, though.

Anyway, enough about my feelings on that, I guess. Back to Black and Gram.

For me, outside of his focal relationships with White and Sean, Black has more interesting storylines with Eugene individually and with Todd (the man who tried to have him killed), than he does with Gram at this point.

And, tbh, we’re past the point of return for me on Gram’s character. We don’t know anything about him other than he has a crush on Black and/or Eugene and he used to date Nuch. I don’t know a thing about his family or home life. I have no sense of what hobby he might have or why he’s even in the gang other than some vague dissatisfaction with the legal system that more seems like he’s parroting Black than it’s his own feelings on the matter.

Unfortunately, I just don’t know if I want to even invest time in his character anymore. Even if the last 3 eps focused entirely on Gram (which we know damn well is not gonna happen), I don’t know if I could turn around on his character now.

I’m a bit sad about it cuz all the other character work is so strong in the show but they completely dropped the ball with Gram. And I quite liked Gram in the first few episodes. It’s a damn shame.

Like I feel more intrigued by Todd’s shady, corrupt ass right now. 

Speaking of...how great was the Todd and Black stuff this ep? I didn’t liveblog about it last ep because I actually didn’t have much time for tumblr but I had briefly wondered if Todd was just using the gang to get rid of Tawi as a competitor and this episode confirmed it. 

I also loved that the flashback revealed so much about Todd’s motivation with such succinct scene writing. Like, in Todd’s twisted reasoning, he partially started on this road to prove to Black that he could make the world “better” by dominating the power structure and forcing it to be what he wants. And then he could give Black what he thinks Black wants. Within limits, of course, because Todd would never fully give up the power and privilege he was raised into and has grown used to. Just as Black and White are perfect foils for each other, Todd is also the perfect foil for both of the twins. Having grown up in privilege just like them but unlike the twins, deciding to revel in it and want to maintain the status quo to continue to benefit from it.

The way the show has been slow revealing that even though Todd is a corrupt piece of shit, it’s clear that he feels some kind of connection to the twins from their childhood and there’s especially some semi-regret over his broken friendship with Black. The scene in the hospital when he calls Black a good guy was the first hint but this episode sealed the deal for me. There’s a part of Todd not fully corrupted by his need for power or by his inhibited empathy that actually seems to miss Black (and somewhat White too, though less so imo because of the years White was apart from them in Russia).

The look in Todd’s eyes as he’s drowning Black and then realizing that he can’t fully commit to killing him despite setting up this trap and despite Black having just held a gun to his face, so he pulls Black up.... Whew, that scene was really well realized by Sing. 

It actually makes me wonder if that’s the real reason Todd took care of Black’s medical recovery. Because surely letting Black die or even killing him discretely while he was in a coma would still net the same results with manipulating White to take down Tawi for him and would have ensured that Todd’s secret about nearly killing Black would have been buried. But clearly Todd has some unresolved feelings about Black and he’s struggling to reconcile his need to protect his empire and his memory of who he and Black used to be.

Meanwhile, Black is fucking reeling. The mess with White taking over his life and changing everything about his personal relationships with his friends is putting him on his back foot. And his inability to process his anger and frustration with that plus his overprotectiveness with White being his little brother is causing him to take it out on Sean. 

Then he’s still trying to deal with Todd’s betrayal and his need for revenge there only for Todd to completely overpower him in minutes and almost kill him again. Literally the only reason he’s alive is because this man who used to be his friend, who put him in a coma, had mercy on him and let him go. He’s feeling completely powerless in his life and so he comes back to the gang and tries to reassert control there only for everyone to side with letting in a cop, of all people. Then Sean overpowers him again and declares he’s not gonna stop seeing White which means Black couldn’t even protect his little brother. In Black’s mind, his life is in shambles. 

I can’t wait until the next confrontation between White and Black because this is exactly the time for Black to be confronted with the fact that he works better with White at his side. White is his literal soulmate and if he could just take off the overprotective, older brother glasses he wears, he would see that they could truly enact the change that he spoke about in that flashback if he trusts in White instead of in Todd. Like, imagine that conversation if instead of Todd it had been White as he is now in that room. Black having that clear and strong vision of the future he wants to manifest for his people and the ability and charisma to strategize effectively with White’s ability to understand the wider impact on the populace and on the political stage. The twins could literally be unstoppable if they worked together.

Like, that’s some good shit, man. I’m all the way in on this part of the show.

[azucanela]

SOME THINGS NEVER CHANGE

PAIRING: SUGAWARA KOUSHI X FEM!READER

REQUEST: if you’re feeling into it a suga fic where they like dated during high school and later get back together after college would be awesome!! maybe fem y/n was manager for karasuno or something and they just broke up bc of distance! and if you don’t want to do this that’s perfectly okay! take care of yourself, you’re an amazing writer!!

WARNINGS: ANGST TO FLUFF. KISSING. MILD TIMESKIP SPOILERS.

WORD COUNT: 1.9k

A/N: i love suga, SUGA SUPREMACY, thank you for the request it was fun to write!

HAIKYUU!! MASTERLIST

HE LOVED HER AND THERE WAS NO DENYING IT, but it wouldn’t be the first time that two people very in love had been forced apart for whatever the circumstances. 

You could see it in the way he forced her onto the inside of the sidewalk— a small thing done in an attempt to keep her safe from possible incoming cars. You could see it in the way Sugawara’s eyes fell on her absently, so encapsulated with her words and the passion in her voice. You could see it in the way he seemed to light up when he saw her in the stands of his volleyball games, even though he likely wouldn’t be playing. 

And oh did Y/N L/N love him as well. Her sad smiles at the mention of his name were evidence enough, and if not, it was the way she frequently asked Daichi and Asahi of his health full well knowing the boy had a tendency to forego taking care of himself when he was so caught up in the well being of others.

Kageyama had observed it early on— or more accurately, Hinata had observed it early on, pointing out to the young setter that his senior was obviously enamored with their second manager. Hinata’s emotional intelligence had always been far ahead of Kageyama’s, although Kageyama had noticed the difference in... treatment between the pair, he had never truly realized they were dating.

But it soon became abundantly clear that they were in fact, together. And Y/N L/N wasn’t just the other manager of the Karasuno Boy’s Volleyball Team, but the girlfriend of Sugawara Koushi.

Which is the main reason why Kageyama had suspected she hated him early on, after all he’d taken her boyfriend’s spot on the starting line up, and he had bluntly pointed this fact out to her by the vending machine one day. Though Y/N had simply laughed it off, bringing a hand to Kageyama’s shoulder and offering him a smile.

Just like Sugawara had. Maybe that’s what made them the perfect pair, Kageyama wasn’t sure. But anyone with a set of eyes could tell they were a disgustingly perfect couple. 

Which is why Kageyama had never imagined they would break up. Nor had anyone in the club really. Even Asahi and Daichi were left in shock as the pair went their separate ways. 

It was supposed to make things easier, leaving. They would both be abandoning everything they ever knew and heading off to college after all, and seeing as they’d both ended up at different colleges... well, how plausible was a long distance relationship? 

It was a mutual break up. That they mutually did not want. 

Not much changed if Y/N is honest, and maybe that’s why she didn’t find herself sobbing in her bed until she actually got to college. It was just a label, but at one point... the change became alarmingly clear to her— the fact that she and Sugawara Koushi were no longer together.

Sugawara felt it in the little things, when he went to message her good morning and remember that... they weren’t together anymore. Did Y/N even want a good morning text? Maybe she was receiving one from someone else now. 

Talking wasn’t awkward, with the silent agreement that if they ever needed someone to talk to, they would always be there. But the change was painful enough to drive them apart in a way that wasn’t just physical. 

It’s not until she’s seeing him again that Y/N is reminded of that very pain once more, though the smile on her face is still very genuine and authentic as she throws her arms around the three boys from her third year. 

Sugawara holds on for a little too long. 

“It’s so good to see you guys! Are we all excited for our boys’ final tournament of their third year?” She exclaimed as she wrapped an arm around Kiyoko.

Daichi ruffles Y/N’s hair as he grins, “of course I’m excited to see them win again.” Comes his reply.

And of course, Asahi finds himself beaming with an albeit nervous smile as he agrees, “definitely! I believe in them.”

“I dunno guys, maybe Hinata will forget to spike again,” Sugawara chimes in, jokingly of course, while Kiyoko nods along with the rest of her friends as she offers them a small smile. Her eyes drifting to the arm that Sugawara throws over Y/N’s shoulder. “It’ll be just like old times!”

Just like old times indeed.

Daichi finds himself giving Asahi a look, that is returned with a look of confusion until he gently shoves him forward, a look of realization washing over his face as he begins to walk faster and Kiyoko says, “why don’t we head on over to our seats guys?” She turns to Y/N and Sugawara, “would you mind getting us some snacks from the vendors?”

The pair exchanges looks momentarily before Y/N offers Kiyoko a smile as she nods, “yeah, of course. Any preferences?”

“The usual!” Daichi replies, waving them off as he drags Asahi away, winking at Sugawara before disappearing around the corner alongside Kiyoko as well. 

Sugawara simply raises a brow, opening his mouth to say something until Y/N’s hand comes to grasp his own— loosely holding the one wrung around her shoulder as she begins to speak of which vendor they should visit.

But the only thing he can focus on is the ring she wears. For a moment, he panics, thinking that someone else has already snatched her away, that he lost the woman he loves.

Until he looks a little closer and recognizes the very promise ring he’d given her in their third year, almost identical to the one he was currently wearing around his neck, attached to a chain he’d purchased shortly into his first year of college. After all, he couldn’t bring himself to take it off either. 

Y/N seems to take note of this, pausing before noticing where his gaze has fallen, her cheeks warming at the realization. “I’ve been meaning to return the ring to you, sorry about that.” She releases his hand with a tight lipped smile, moving to remove the ring, only for Sugawara’s hand to come over hers as he shakes his head.

“Keep it. What would I do with it anyways?” And who else would he give it to?

Y/N pauses, eyes drifting between the ring and Sugawara for a moment before replying, “okay.”  

It’s not that they hadn’t talked at all in the past few years, just that things had changed and now neither of them new where the boundaries were. What could they do? What couldn’t they? Where was the invisible line between friend and former lover? It was a line they danced around in each interaction and today was no different.

Y/N finds herself desperately needing some space as she inhales deeply, perhaps it’s because she’s shocked by how easily he’d wormed his way back into her heart in the five seconds they’d been together now. Or maybe it’s the reminder that nothing had changed, she was still going to college across the country.

It’s not until they’re seated beside each other once more, two years later, that Y/N realizes nothing had changed. 

It’s a party they’d thrown for the New Year, and practically a get together for their teammates, new and old. They pair had managed to get onto professional teams— to no ones surprise. Although the fact that they’d be opposing each other was a surprise. 

Somehow, Y/N and Sugawara had found themselves on the balcony of the home, fresh out of college— which had really been the only thing keeping them apart up until now.

So, something had changed.

“You’re officially a teacher!” Y/N exclaimed, beaming at Sugawara with a smile that he quickly returns, drink in hand. 

He’s leaning against the balcony. eyes drifting towards the lively city as he replies, “kind of. I was lucky to even get hired so soon after graduating.” He takes a sip of his drink, “I just hope next year is better.”

A small laugh escapes Y/N as she downs what is left of her own drink, “me too, Suga.” Their eyes meet, and she can see the way he stiffens at the name, it had been a while since she’d called him by anything other than his first name. Though Y/N disregards this fact as she asks, “so what school are you working at?”

Y/N can see the passion in his eyes as he begins to speak of the school he’ll be working at, nodding along until she realizes, she recognizes the name, mouth gaping open as she asks, “are you serious? I recently got a job at one of the corporations in that area!” She exclaimed. Sugawara is opening his mouth to say something when they suddenly hear the people inside cry out—

10.

“Oh! I didn’t realize it was that time.” Y/N mumbled, looking inside to see their friends— new and old— congregating together around the TV. She wonders how time could’ve passed so quickly, it feels as though she had only ventured out to the balcony a few minutes prior because last Y/N had checked, it was barely 10PM.

9.

Sugawara allows a laugh to escape him as he nods, “time flies by when you’re having fun right?” And Y/N finds herself in shock momentarily, wondering if maybe he’d read her mind.

8.

Y/N turns to him, offering him a small smile as she nods in agreement, “it does. Doesn’t it?” And Sugawara is left feeling breathless, even after all these years, her smile still seems to have that effect on him. 

7.

“I did, have fun. By the way.” Sugawara says, eyes darting between the door of the balcony and Y/N. His words are true, he did have fun, of course Sugawara would never consider lying to Y/N. And even if he did try, Sugawara had a feeling she’d be able to tell. 

6. 

“We should head back inside.” She continues, eyes drifting back towards where their friends are calling out the countdown. Huddled together, Y/N finds herself smiling at the sight of Tanaka’s arm around Kiyoko’s shoulder.

5.

Y/N meets Kiyoko’s eyes momentarily, and the look Kiyoko gives her is one of urgency, one that tells her, “don’t you dare come back here right now.” But Y/N finds herself rolling her eyes as she begins to head back inside. 

4.

Their relationship had been over for years, and yet Kiyoko was still trying to convince her that the boy’s feelings never changed. Though Y/N wouldn’t deny that she would always love Sugawara— and she had no doubt that he still loved her— those feelings were probably purely platonic now. Right?

3.

Right. Y/N shakes off the feeling as she continues inside, until she feels a hand wrap around her wrist, keeping her from carrying on inside and yanking her backwards. Y/N finds herself colliding with Sugawara’s chest with a gasp.

2.

Sugawara’s eyes meet hers, a clear question within them as he wordlessly places his drink on the rim of the balcony. The hand on her wrist still firmly placed there as Y/N nods slowly.

1. 

And suddenly his lips finds hers, Y/N’s arm winding around his neck with her drink still in hand while Sugawara’s hand comes to her waist in an attempt to pull her closer. Almost desperate to be closer to each other as the crowd inside begins screaming and cheering. Y/N frees her other hand from his grasp and brings it to his shirt to tug him even closer while his other hands comes to her cheek.

When they pull away, Sugawara is grinning as he says, “happy new year, babe.”

[aotopmha]

Hello-I think that ymir didn't have to die, she died very soon when she began to develop as a character, she still had potential,the author killed her to be able to develop a romance(bond/friendship idk) between eren & historia. thanks to her death, he started erehisu

I'm of the opinion that Eren and Historia never had a (in particular) romantic thing even hinted at.

I think it's not intended to be a thing.

I think Ymir's character wasn't actually a collateral of the typical trope of killing gay characters for the sake of straight relationships, but rather the plot knowledge she had. I think it's a byproduct of having to kill her for the plot.

(I think Historia is the same way, Isayama just couldn't figure out any other way to keep her from breaking the plot, which is another conversation to be had because he still resorted to a pregnancy to do so; he could've even just killed her, I think it would've been a bummer, but still better than making her a baby machine.)

I think it makes sense Ymir would protect Historia any way she could, so her choice at least makes sense, but if she had come back with Historia, she could've also spilled the beans about the world before the basement.

In hindsight, I really think this is the case. I think you could've done this in any number of ways without killing freckled Ymir, but that's sadly not what happened.

But now I get to talk about the Eren/Historia relationship and Eren's relationships with most of the major female characters of the story.

The biggest reason I think the Eren/Historia pairing has gained traction romantically is because some people like certain tropes/want some things to happen narratively:

1) Stone-faced guy protecting his demure object-like wife.

Seriously, whenever Historia is paired with Eren I always see her portrayed as this hyper-feminine, helpless damsel.

At least make her just as proactive or fierce or anything resembling her as when she was a character. Make her the actual "worst girl", but no, it's all mostly the boring "protect pregnant waifu" stuff. More fanworks of her as this selfish asshole would be wonderful.

But they also do have an actual complex two-sided dynamic present in the story.

(Chapter 54)

Eren values her as herself, as Historia and Historia basically tells him to stop sacrificing himself and live in the cave.

I love their dynamic in the Uprising arc, but instead most of the time I see any fan works centered around them be the most milquetoast, standard "protect the cute girl" crap you can find basically anywhere else, with maybe the added fantasy of genociding the world. It's fucking boring to me.

This is also really interesting to me because before this final arc, Eren/Historia was even unpopular as a crackship. Even after the Uprising arc. Not many people seem to have given a shit about their relationship (their actual complex dynamic) before Historia became the mute baby machine.

It's what I see as the "taming of the schrew" syndrome/fantasy (named after the Shakespeare play) – the female character being the passive silent observer that needs to stay in the kitchen, listening to and doing everything the male characters say.

2) If a male character as much as talks to a female character, they are clearly in love.

This has happened with Eren and most of the main female players in the story. I already covered Historia.

Second is Mikasa.

I think Mikasa actually is the only female character with any actual setup for romantic feelings for him in the story and the only female character Eren actively asks what she feels for him:

(Chapter 123)

I think where they ended up narratively makes perfect sense and if there is basis to romantically ship one dynamic in this story, it's this one.

Third is Annie.

They had a teacher-student relationship. But they actually were a fairly popular romantic pairing for a time, too, eventhough we also don't get anything all that suggestive between them.

I still think it's much more natural to read them as a romantic pairing than anything with Historia, too, although it's still a pretty big of a stretch.

He is fiercely defensive of her and learned to fight from her and she admires his courage, wants him to care of himself because he's someone she thinks wants to genuinely make the world a better place and she's kind of a tease.

There's the really old detail of Annie having feelings for Eren in a databook and Isayama clarifying it's not like that.

I really like how their dynamic is called back to in the final chapter:

In the end, Annie wanted him to learn to care for himself. I'm sad I haven't seen anyone comment on this little bit of characterisation all that much.

Although the warriors wanted to die, they didn't get what they wanted and although Eren ultimately wanted to live, he didn't get what he wanted, either. I think it's neat.

Finally there's even Pieck. They were just talking to each other, too:

(Chapter 116)

But this pairing became a thing when this chapter happened, although this also was more of a crack pairing thing.

It's the combination of a (main) male character and the belief that apparently male and female characters can't ever have non-romantic dynamics.

This is common in shounen writing for sure and I think is the case in AoT with Annie and Armin and Sasha and Nicolo (but it's still better than most because I think their relationships at least make sense), but people imposing a romantic relationship between a male and female character where there is none is actually also really common in fandom. It's both a writer and a fan thing.

Not knocking any shippers that are decent people or people who like that stuff: it's not my thing, but if you care about it, you're free to.

3) Wanting a "happy ending" for Historia.

Her ending up with farmer is disliked by many because he's not a character. People want it to be Eren also because he's a character we actually care about and we know a character that cares about Historia.

It's the very basic, "at least they chose it and that's why they are happy" kind of thing, not really considering any other aspects to Eren's or Historia's character.

Eren's relationship with Mikasa was set up to be romantic a long time ago, so I think that's the right direction for the story to take.

Overall, I think it's pretty obvious where people take the romantic relationship between Eren and Historia from, but I don't think it is mostly from the story.

They have a strong friendship for sure, but I also don't think freckled Ymir was killed just so that relationship could exist and Isayama delibrately "created erehisu".

There are literally no romantically-framed scenes between them. Every time they talk, they just talk to each other.

Thank you for the ask!

[4ragon]

think i could ask for your opinion on phoenix and apollo's relationship? honestly it's kind of hard for me to imagine how the dynamic's supposed to be naturally evolving between AA4, 5, and 6, so i was wondering if you had any insight

Ooo, see, this one is a biiiit tough, because I think there’s a slight discrepancy between how it happens in game and how I think it would develop. Because the Phoenix of AA4 is very different from AA5, and there’s really no getting around that. The writers scrapped a lot of AA4′s ideas, and I think they needed a much stronger bridge between AA4 and AA5 in a lot of ways. They needed to give Apollo more story before introducing a new protagonist, they needed to keep Klavier longer, they needed something to show Phoenix developing back into his old characterization if that was the direction they wanted to go (I personally wasn’t the BIGGEST fan of AA4 Phoenix’s characterization but I still wish Dual Destinies could’ve given him a bit more of an edge, maybe a halfway point or something). 

So, in terms of what the text actually gives us, we see Phoenix start off as this absent mentor, one who, honestly, is kind of shitty to Apollo. He’s not very caring or helpful, he uses Apollo in multiple instances, he doesn’t really give Apollo a lot of reason to believe he particularly cares for him beyond their professional connection. And, on Phoenix’s side, he is aware that Apollo is his daughter’s biological brother from day one and does nothing about this (which I have a LOT of thoughts about but moving on). Not even to say the bloody ace thing, which is a huge breach of trust.

Now, let’s skip to AA5. Dual Destinies. Suddenly, Phoenix is back into the mentor position, but this time, with Athena, it’s very different. He very clearly and actively cares for her wellbeing, physical and emotional. He is actively helpful, even assisting her on cases at several points, and stepping in to lead the case when he’s needed. He’s kind and cheerful and supportive and everything he wasn’t to Apollo for months and months.

So do we conclude that Phoenix realized the error of his ways? Does Phoenix just like Athena more than he liked Apollo? Did the writers just not care about consistency? There are many ways to interpret this shift, but I choose to think that once he started getting back on his feet (and I do truly feel like he was really struggling with depression in AA4), that he slowly started becoming that mentor that I think he wanted to be. And it’s very easy to step back into that position by starting with Athena, someone he has NOT disappointed yet, and slowly build up a rapport with Apollo, someone who HAD been affected negatively by Phoenix’s behavior previously.

I think it is clear that by AA6, Phoenix trusts and cares about Apollo. He says as much in case 2. He’s seen Apollo develop over the three games and knows that, despite their rough start, Apollo is someone Phoenix can trust to at least always do what he thinks is right. (And I have to feel like there’s maaaaybe just a little bit of guilt toward everything from AA4)

Also, I do think that there’s still a bit of that lingering mistrust on Apollo’s side in AA5, given how he shut everyone out after Clay’s murder. He left to investigate Athena on his own, and started becoming more and more mistrustful, and given Phoenix’s treatment of the two of them, I kind of get where he’s coming from. I think coming to trust Athena again because of Phoenix could certainly have gone a long way in reestablishing that trust between Apollo and Phoenix as well.

But yeah, I feel like even in game there are some gaps that need to be fleshed out a bit more, particularly between AA4-AA5. 

Just. Just one game. One game between AA4 and AA5 and I probably would’ve been satisfied.

Oh well. At least out of game, the world is my oyster.