in darkness shall you be reborn
Chapter 14.
Word count: 3090
Warnings: some manhandling on Nikki's part
A/N: this is just as unexpected to me as it is to you. i just had nothing to do in class lol
“Damn it,” Tommy laughed hoarsely, his chest trembling. “I swear I could have got you this time.”
“You couldn’t, but it was a praiseworthy try.” Nikki sheathed his rapier, stretched out his hand and helped Tommy up. Vince caught a grimace of pain flashing across the first mate’s face. The masterful, almost effortless disarming must have been less pleasant to experience than watch. Although Tommy should be thankful to get out of this death match practically unscathed.
“See?” Mick said. “All ended well. There was no need to annoy me about it. And don’t look at me all pissed. You needed to hear that, and better from me than from Nikki.”
Vince wanted to tell him a lot of things, the majority of which would definitely lose him whatever amiability Mick still harbored towards him. A few more seconds, and it would surely spill. And if there was anything Vince had learned on the “Shout”, it was that letting out emotions only made matters worse. Every time, without fail.
So he said nothing - only glared at Mick and stormed off to the galley. His fists itched to punch something; Mick himself was off limits, but his pillow seemed like a good alternative. Vince had a lot of other, more creative ideas, but even his mind clouded with anger understood the harm that would be done wouldn’t be worth the harm Vince would get inflicted upon himself in return.
He was halfway there when a hand landed on his shoulder. Vince couldn’t help but flinch. Did Nikki notice his presence, after all?
”Hey, blondie, hold your horses!” No, that wasn’t Nikki. Vince turned around and met eyes with Slash. He was the closest to them when Vince was so carelessly criticizing Nikki’s skill. Mick’s warning immediately came to mind; his stomach sank. Did Slash hear their conversation? What was he going to do about it?
“What?” Vince asked sharply. Too sharply, apparently, because Slash was clearly taken aback.
“Wow, why are you so pissed? I ain’t done you no wrong.”
Yet, Vince wanted to add, but held it back. He still didn’t know what Slash wanted.
“Don’t call me that,” he said in a softer tone.
“Well, I still don’t know your name,” Slash shrugged. “Gotta get by somehow.”
“It’s Vince. Now you no longer have that excuse.”
“Really?” Slash raised his eyebrow. “I expected something posher.”
“It’s a very simple version of my actual name,” Vince said dryly. “That’s all you’re getting. I’m not giving you any more reasons to mock me.”
“Man, you really taking that to heart?” Slash seemed genuinely surprised. How could someone not take that to heart? “C’mon, we were just messing around. We do that a lot - it gets boring here.” He patted Vince on the shoulder condescendingly. “Vince it be then. You know, I’ve overheard you and Mick chatting-“
“I was just joking around,” Vince interrupted him, his heart beginning to race. “Didn’t mean anything by that.”
“Really?” Slash’s face dropped. “Damn, and I was thinking you were onto something there. I practice the way the captain tells me to but I ain’t getting nowhere. And he always says I ain’t trying hard enough. But if you just made it all up…”
Vince couldn’t believe his ears. Was Slash actually… taking him seriously? After all Nikki did to crush any semblance of respect the crew could still have towards him?
“You know, every joke has a grain of truth in it,” he said hastily. “It won’t hurt to try, anyway.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Slash nodded. “You got any specific suggestions? Some moves I could try, maybe?”
“Uh,” Vince recalled his training sessions. Back then he was irritated that a significant part of them was dedicated to solitary practice and exercise, bemoaning that it took time away from actual sparring, but the pirates had just demonstrated how the lack of the former inherently undermined the latter. He scrambled to bring to his memory the exercises his teacher made him do. A few seemed helpful for Slash’s problem. “I think so. You’ve got good reaction and speed to match, but your precision and distance perception lack. You should practice on your own first so you can pay very close attention to muscle movements-“
“Really? How’s that gonna be helpful?” Slash wrinkled his nose skeptically. “What’s the point of just waving the sword around? I ain’t gonna fight a spirit.”
“It ain’t, I mean isn’t, just waving it around,” Vince began explaining patiently. “You’ve got to build your muscle memory before sparring. What’s the point of it if you don’t know what to do? You should become familiar with your body first, how fast it can move, how strongly it can strike, how long it can hold on in a fight. When you don’t know your own limitations, you turn them into weaknesses, which the enemy can – and will – exploit. You don’t need to get rid of them completely – I doubt it’s even possible – but you can plan your strategy around them.”
“The guys are gonna think I drank too much rum fighting air.”
“Are you so afraid of looking stupid you’d rather get gutted in a real fight?” Vince bristled. “I’m not forcing you to do it. It’s you who came to me for advice. If you don’t like it, you can fuck right off.”
To his surprise, Slash grinned wide, baring an unexpectedly complete collection of white teeth.
“Huh, you’re adapting quick. Fine, fine, I guess I gotta try it out. What do I do?”
“There are a couple moves you can start with. Basic ones. I’ll show you.” Vince walked to the stack of wooden swords in a sack, pulled one out and gave it a test swing. The handle, polished by countless hands to the point of shining, spun readily in his palm. The prop was just a little bit lighter than a real weapon, and the familiar heaviness of a blade in his hand pricked his heart with wistfulness. He shook it off.
“Alright, here’s what you can do…” Vince replicated the first exercise to the best of his ability, surprised to find that the familiar muscle strain it provoked was quite enjoyable. It did disturb his healing shoulder, but the pain wasn’t serious enough to put his arm out of action. Slash watched attentively, then picked up another sword and tried to copy him.
“Not bad.” Vince adjusted his elbows. “Now do the swing. Yes, it’s hard to control both your arms and footwork at the same time. That’s the point. When it stops being hard and starts feeling like second nature, you can try the next one. Look here.”
He assumed the position again and swung his arm back. Suddenly Slash’s gaze shifted on something behind him, his eyes widening, and the next second pain exploded in Vince’s wrist as it was twisted viciously, the wooden sword hitting the deck with a bang. Vince couldn’t hold back a cry of pain when his arm was locked into a painful hammerlock, forcing him to bend forward.
“Slash, you are on nightguard for the next week.” Nikki’s voice was simmering with barely contained rage. “And if I ever see you, or anyone else, let the slave touch the weapons – real, wooden, doesn’t matter – they won’t get away with it as easily. Is that clear?”
“But captain, you never said-“ Slash began.
“Do I have to tell you not to piss in the water barrels too? Because that’s just as obvious. As the first warning, you’re only getting a week. Keep bitching, and that’ll turn into a month. Was that clear?”
Slash’s eyes sparked with indignation from underneath his hair, lips parted as if he was on a verge of snapping back, and Vince waited with bated breath for him to do it, to point out how unfair Nikki was. As if reading his mind, Nikki pressed harder on Vince’s wrist, making him drop his head and gasp in pain, and that tipped the scales.
“Yes, captain,” Slash said through gritted teeth. “It won’t happen again.”
“Very well.” Nikki slightly eased the pressure but didn’t let Vince go. Looked like only crewmates were getting off this easy, Vince realized with dismay as Nikki pushed him in the direction of his cabin. If he wanted to just beat him, he would do it right there and then.
“Don’t be too hard on him, captain,” Slash said suddenly. “I asked him for it.”
“And he knew there would be consequences to doing it. I’ll handle him as I see fit, Slash. You get down to work.” Nikki sped up, dragging Vince with him. Vince caught a glimpse of Slash behind them, his expression helpless.
When they reached the cabin, Nikki threw open the door and pushed Vince inside with such force he landed on his knees and skidded forward on them at least half a foot, shredding the fabric on his knees and scraping off the top layer of skin. Amid the sharp pain came a bang of a door slammed shut, and then a hand grabbed his hair and pulled it up violently, and a new pain drowned out the other, fogged up his vision. He grasped at the hand in his hair, fruitlessly trying to unclench the fingers, but no scratching and pulling could weaken Nikki’s iron grip.
His cheek felt the coolness of the wood of the cabin wall, but not for long – Nikki gripped his shoulder and turned him around, his face now mere inches away, and it was so disfigured with the pure, uncontained rage Vince shuddered.
“Who do you think you are?” he hissed, fingers digging into Vince’s shoulder, making him wince in pain – because, of course, Nikki chose the wounded one. “Who the hell do you think you are, you little piece of shit?”
“I didn’t do anything wrong!” Vince tried to protest, but was promptly silences with a slap on the face so powerful his vision went white for a second, his hair falling onto his face. After a second’s lag the skin there began to burn. He didn’t get any more time to recover, as Nikki once again pulled his hair to bring Vince’s face close to his. If the captain went on with that, a thought flashed past, Vince would soon have no hair left. “You never said I couldn’t touch the weapons!”
“I was pretty explicit you weren’t welcome at the training, weren’t I?” Nikki’s pupils were so dilated they covered almost his whole irises, giving his eyes a sinister look. “You came anyway. Don’t act so surprised now.”
The pain in Vince’s shoulder grew stronger; he could feel hot blood starting to pool under the bandage. He semi-consciously reached for Nikki’s hand, but his wrist was caught halfway and pinned to the wall above his head. Immobilized this way, with Nikki’s knee between his thighs, Vince was completely defenseless.
Nikki leaned closer, his hot breath brushing Vince’s face. “If I ever see you touch – no, even look in a direction of a weapon, any weapon, I will break your fucking fingers. One by one, on both hands. You don’t need them to serve your real purpose anyway. Is that clear now? Am I being convincing enough?”
He was damn convincing, that was for sure. The icy fear coiling in Vince’s guts almost completely put out the burning flame of indignation at the injustice. But he still wanted to know how Nikki would explain that. Surely such a strong reaction didn’t come from just the fear of being criticized. Or, if it did, Nikki’s authority on the ship was much more fragile than it initially seemed.
“But why? I can’t really hurt you - any of you - and you know it!”
Nikki tilted his head, looking at him silently. His expression shifted ever so slightly, sending another array of goosebumps down Vince’s back, but for a different reason now. The anger was still there, but it… calcified, lost its dynamics. Vince recalled a time he felt the same uneasiness – when looking at a death mask of his late uncle. Only Nikki wasn’t dead, and there had to be something underneath it.
Finally, he spoke.
“Yes, you can’t really hurt us, not by a long shot.” His voice was the same unnatural kind of menacing as his face. “You’re not equal to us in any respect either, though. The crew, especially Mick, are being lenient to you in that – you eat with them, you talk to them, you might even joke around a bit – but you’re not one of them and never will be. All of them earned their place here, be that their skill, bravery, intelligence or hardness. You, on the other hand,” Nikki released Vince’s shoulder only to hook his finger under the collar and pull on it, “you have none of that. You’re a whiny, spoiled, ungrateful brat. You’re only good for one thing, and that is what you’re going to do while on the Shout, whether you want it or not. You seem to forget what it is. Do you want me to remind you?”
“No,” Vince murmured, already knowing that his answer would not change anything.
“See,” Nikki pulled harder on the collar, and now their faces almost touched, “you’re doing that again. Shirking, slacking off. Counting on preferential treatment that you’ve been getting your whole life. I have bad news for you: here you have to earn every little bit of food you’re getting, every sip of beer you’re drinking. And do you know how are you gonna do that?” Nikki smiled an unnatural, toothy smile. “By spreading your legs in front of me and anyone who I give my permission to use you. By doing what I tell you to, whenever and wherever I want. By being a good, obedient, docile little whore. And a whore doesn’t need a weapon. Did I answer your question?”
Blood flushed to Vince’s cheeks; his throat closed up. Not that he didn’t know any of that, but he was still clinging to Nikki’s vague promise of rising in the ranks if Vince proved himself worthy even without realizing that, even knowing it was never going to happen. This was it, though; this was the last straw. There was nothing for Vince in the future, just more pain and humiliation, as if what he already had got was not enough.
Another slap, this time unexpected, again blinded him. What was that for, to drive the lesson home?
“I don’t tolerate when my questions are ignored,” Nikki explained when he caught Vince’s confused gaze. “Once again. Did I answer your question?”
Never before had a nod seemed this challenging. As Vince tilted his head forward, his tongue tasted metallic.
“Good.” Nikki finally released him and stepped back. Vince’s knees were so weak he could barely stand and had to lean onto the wall for a moment. This surely wasn’t the end of it, he thought, watching Nikki warily. There had to be more coming, something that would warrant dragging him to the cabin when all the things so far said and done to him would be much easier and more effective to do outside, in front of the whole crew. Nikki was just messing with him, giving him an inkling of hope only to later step on it. And he still hadn’t demanded Vince follow up on his promise.
But seconds passed, and Nikki wasn’t making the next move. What’s more, he didn’t even pay any more attention to Vince, lighting up a cigarette and settling in his chair with his back turned to him instead. But he didn’t give him a permission to leave either, and after what just happened Vince wouldn’t hurry to treat a lack of explicit prohibition as one.
Things were getting really awkward, and Nikki didn’t seem to care one bit. Vince began to slowly move along the wall in the direction of the door. No response from the captain.
Oh, damn this motherfucker. “Sir?” Vince called, his voice trembling. “Can I go?”
Nikki turned his head slowly and looked Vince over from head to toe. Vince couldn’t handle the smug look on his face, so he looked above his shoulder instead.
“Huh, you’re learning.” He let out a cloud of smoke. “Yes, you can.”
Vince took solace in slamming the door of the cabin behind him so hard the whole ship seemed to vibrate at the impact. That was probably the reason why all the pirates followed him with their gazes while he was hurrying across the deck to the hatch that led to the galley, but he still couldn’t shake off the feeling of filth smeared all over his body, invisible to him but clear to everyone else. At one point he caught a glimpse of Slash’s mane in the corner of his eye, but didn’t even turn his head.
Vince wanted to slam the door to the galley behind himself as well, but at the last moment chickened out and softened the push. Still, the sound was louder than usual, prompting Mick, who was chopping something up on the kitchen counter, to turn around.
“Oh,” he said, looking Vince over. “Lemme guess: you did what I explicitly told you not to do?”
“Shut up,” Vince grumbled, pushing past him and plopping down onto his blanket.
“You did,” Mick concluded with a sigh. “You should probably drop by Izzy’s place.”
“Don’t tell me what to do.” Vince rolled over to face the wall and pulled a blanket over himself. His knees burned like they’ve been sanded off, the shoulder wound throbbed under the wet bandage and the ringing of slaps in the face still echoed in his ears, but overall it could be much worse. He wasn’t going to come crying to the surgeon with every scratch.
“I see.” Mick’s voice hardened. “Well, I’ve got bad news for you: you will do what I tell you to-“
Vince flinched, his tongue again tasting blood.
“-because I’m your boss down here. Now, if you don’t need a doctor, you’re good enough to get your ass up and peel those potatoes. C’mon, c’mon.”
The tapping of the knife on the cutting board resumed. Vince sat up, slowly unwrapped the blanket, picked up the knife sent in his direction and settled at the counter without a word.
It was a good thing he had to stand with his back towards Mick when working. The cook still saw later how badly the potatoes were peeled, though.
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