#I always see mixed results on next-gen stuff

[headfullof-ideas]

I am…curious.

Whilst planning the finer details of the timeline of this very long story (RTTE has, like, nine seasons at the moment) I had a thought, due to some oc’s I’ve thought of, or have developed for other stuff.

I’m already thinking and loosely planning on doing so, but how would people feel about an epilogue at the end of the story revealing the next generation of dragon riders? And a potential spin-off/sequel of their shenanigans?

[boop-le-snoot]

PARTY FAVOURS | CHAPTER 19

First time reader click here

Summary+TWs: We're talking serious feelings here, okay? Reader, you're literally emotionally illiterate. You also have PTSD, which is finally addressed - kinda. Bruce does his best. And he also knows how to kiss... But y'all know that if you read my ramblings about lucid dreaming/shifting/whatever... Chile-, anyways...

My phone kept buzzing and I ignored it until Bruce declared it was time to take a break and review the results. Whilst the man was typing up the data on a nearby StarkPad, I fought the sudden influx of messages that I received from haters and supporters alike after Tony decided on tweeting a reply that could be interpreted in an alarming variety of ways. It was a smart move, I'll admit, but a fucking bother for me nonetheless.

Disabling my DMs and dealing with a follower increase in the thousands wasn't hard; I didn't consider myself a problematic asshole and didn't need to be afraid of "exposure". The parties I went to - I doubted there was any blackmail material in there and the few nudes I'd sent over the years were always face-less. As a gen Z, I knew my internet safety.

The trolls didn't bother me either. It was more sad than annoying, people shitting on others for clout. Iron Man stans were witty, at least, if jealous. I must admit I've never considered the influx of popularity I would experience should I publicly out myself as a friend of Tony's. Girlfriend? Intern? Science child? Whatever cover story he was going to feed the press worked for me, as long as I still got the hugs, the kisses, the dick and the attention.

"Tony..." Bruce groaned, evidently done with the data processing, had to have opened his social media to see his own skyrocketing popularity.

"Yeah, our Tony is being a Tony again," I chuckled, having reset my social media settings so my phone wouldn't constantly beep, vibrate and bother me. School was going to be fun.

Bruce shook his head, fond, coming over to my side of the lab after removing his own hazmat suit. His eyes shiny with newfound knowledge and hair turned adorably fluffy in the confines of the head covering. He was smiling softly. "Food?"

"Sure."

We chewed our sandwiches in silence for a moment, each of us lost in our thoughts.

"I still can't believe Tony told everyone on Twitter you're his girlfriend, usually he keeps this stuff private or schedules a fancy press conference," Bruce's tone was thoughtful.

I raised an eyebrow. "Is that what it was? Seemed ambiguous to me..." I trailed off, confused.

"He worded it like that on purpose, I mean, you're still in high school," The scientist was confident in his words. "But I know Tony. I'm a hundred percent sure that he meant exactly that. Aren't you?"

Shock flooded me. Suddenly, I understood I completely misread the situation. "Um, no? I thought we were, y'know, just fucking. We never defined our relationship and we're definitely not exclusive." I said, chewing on my lip. "You make a valid argument, I'm a high school student and he's a grown ass man that does grown man stuff. Putting aside the fact that he could have anybody in the world so why would he choose me?" I was rambling, thinking out loud. Discussing my feelings has never my strong forte. "It would be stupid to impose monogamy on such a complex man like Tony. Downright idiotic to expect a genius to confine to social norms just because it suits others." I finished with a wave of my hand. Another bubble of thought that had festered within me for the longest time. I felt relieved, finally voicing it out loud. A weight had been lifted off my shoulders, a weight I wasn't previously consciously aware of.

Bruce was watching me intently, with an unreadable expression that held the tiniest bit of awe, admiration perhaps. The silence that followed was unnerving. I fidgeted with my hands, not really knowing where to put them or where to look.

"You know," He took off his glasses, fiddling them in his hands. "I'm not going to sugar coat it. For the longest time, I thought you were going to inadvertently hurt him when you get bored with whatever you've got going on. I respect you, don't misunderstand me, but you are young. Now, I've changed my mind. You've changed my mind," He punctuated his statement with his hand on mine, grasping it. "I think you managed to understand him in a way most people can't. Or don't want to. Understand and accept him in a way that some of us can't even after years of working and living side by side with him." Bruce's gentle fingers skimmed along the top of my palm.

"I don't always understand Tony but I do accept him," I agreed. "Because Tony is a great man."

"I think you're in love with him," Bruce said, absolutely having ignored my previous statement. Just like that, point blank, he pushed to the surface the very feelings I got so good at ignoring. There was no rest for me in this place.

My heart fluttered, picking up the pace. I kept my mouth shut, not trusting it whatsoever. My thoughts became akin to panicked hares, jumping and zigzagging aimlessly in my skull. I didn't see the point in defending myself because the scientist had pointed out the obvious.

Bruce looked at me, softly, warmly. "And don't think we haven't noticed the rise in team morale. The improvement not only in communication, but on the battlefield, too. It's easier to entrust your back to someone with whom you've shared a laugh and a drink the previous night. You're the glue that keeps us together."

Something warm and wet was on my cheeks. I stared at our clasped hands, his words echoing in my head over and over and over. The moment I realized I was crying, I willed myself to stop and failed spectacularly - only more salty fluid streamed down, some of it getting in my nose, on my lips. The sleepless nights were making me unstable.

It took a single sniffle for Bruce to pick me up and wrap up in his kind embrace. I didn't resist, tucking my face into the crook of his neck, holding onto the back of his lab coat, inhaling the smell of his skin and chemicals. It was familiar, calming. Minutes ticked by with me slowly leaking the tension out of my body.

"He loves you, too, maybe he just doesn't realize it yet." Bruce whispered into my hair. "I've never seen Tony so happy, even with Pepper. You are special and you are loved."

There was something unsaid, I felt it. It hung in the ear, it burned the tips of my ears, stood sharp on the tip of my tongue. "I love you too, Bwucie-bear," I whispered into the space between his ear and his jaw. His arms tightened around me.

The man placed several chaste kisses in my hair, running a palm over my back. In moments like these, the crush for him, the very crush that got out of control, blossomed fully into a deep sense of respect and admiration. He made me feel safe. He said all the right words at the right time.

Drowsiness overtook me. As usual, any worries and anxieties I had evaporated, once Banner had his arms around me, shielding me from the world. I didn't forbid myself this time: delicately, my hand slipped through the man's soft messy curls, eliciting a contented sigh.

"You haven't been sleeping well," He more stated than asked.

I had no choice but to nod. "Clint keeps dying in my dreams. Or even worse, he doesn't, he just suffers, endlessly, painfully." I admitted.

Bruce flinched under me, tensing. My face was in between his hands in a second, the scientist sternly looking into my eyes. "Why didn't you say anything? All of us assumed you were okay after what happened." He looked - angry. Not Hulk-out pissed but Bruce-pissed, which equalled a kicked-puppy look seasoned with a great pinch of disappointment.

"I am okay." I lied, shamelessly. "It's getting better. That's why I want to have a party - relax a little, dance, socialize. I don't think Tony would let me go on my own so I figured I can convince him to throw one here." I looked away. It was better for everyone if I dealt with my own problems - they were superheroes, not babysitters.

Bruce frowned. "Why wouldn't Tony let you go?"

"Because of that one time I snorted coke," I rolled my eyes at Bruce's naiveté, leaving the less obvious parts unsaid. Tony knew exactly what I was going to do once I got free reign, he considered it destructive and told me so himself. Admittedly, he had a point but still... I wished I'd been given a choice.

"I'll talk to him," Bruce nodded firmly. "That's not acceptable. He can't forbid you from making mistakes and learning from them."

He was met with my shrug. No excitement came from me regarding this particular turn of conversation. I was drained, limbs like jello, thoughts sluggish. My face was drooping.

"Let's get you to bed," Banner stood up with me wrapped around him. "You need a nap."

"No," I protested. If I went to sleep now, only Satan knew at what ungodly hour I would wake up.

"Yes, Princess," Bruce smirked. I wiggled uncomfortably - when he went all caretaker like, my ovaries wreaked havoc on my body and brain. My thoughts weren't appropriate if Bruce wanted me to see him as a father figure. The signals he was sending were mixed. People around me did that a lot and I wasn't sure how to act so I usually just went with the flow. I decided to do the very same thing in that particular moment.

Curiosity sparked within me, tightly interwoven with the deep longing that settled below my collarbones whenever Tony or one of the others wasn't sitting next to me or talking my ear off. I've almost forgotten how it was to be alone with my thoughts. The maze of my very own self was becoming unfamiliar territory. Alarming.

I allowed Bruce to help me shed my shoes and outer layer of clothing, shivering in the coolness of my room. Despite being a frequent visitor, I still had a 'guest' room in the tower - I mostly stayed at Tony's or Wanda's anyways. During our sleepovers neither me nor the witch minded sharing her enormous bed, to be fair, we could have fit at least two more people in it besides us. Tony took care of his own - all the tower's residents had their apartments furnished with the best stuff.

"Sleep now, Princess," Bruce chastised, tucking a blanket around me, having noticed an earbud in my ear and my smartphone in my hand. I had hoped to kill some time online, damn well knowing sleep wouldn't come easy.

"I don't think I can fall asleep, Bruce," I admitted, looking away. There was just so much going on. My brain wouldn't shut up and if I couldn't drown out the cacophony by being productive, I'd troll the internet, as usual.

Banner sighed, coming to sit next to me, leaning against the headboard. Gently running his fingers through my hair, brushing the outside of his palm against my cheek. "How do you usually deal with this?"

Involuntarily, my eyelashes fluttered. "Tony does most of the work," I admitted coyly. The engineer had a whole arsenal of tricks up his sleeve - sexy and exhausting tricks.

"I see," Bruce muttered, thoughtfully.

I opened my eyes to see him looking down at me with a look I haven't seen before. The usual mildly absent, slightly anxious face he wore was replaced by something I could only describe as hurt envy, like a kid looking at their schoolmate who had all the newest, coolest toys. I used to be on the receiving end of that look far too often and I hated it.

I hid my face against his leg, rubbing my cheek on the raspy corduroy fabric of his pants. "Got any good ideas of your own?" I wondered lowly, thinking about what in the world possessed Bruce to wear corduroy trousers on a semi-casual day, in the twenty-first century.

"Only bad ideas," He replied in a matching low tone. His soft fingertips relocated to my nape, goosebumps rising down my back.

"Humour me," I grinned against his leg.

Bruce was quiet for a moment, the sound of his thinking screaming louder than any words could have done. Knowing the scientist so closely, I found out he was full of surprises - bolder than he appeared outwardly and competitive to a boot. He thought he had a lot to prove to himself and by extension, to others. The unknown, the mystery dangling in front of my nose was exhilarating, trepidation addictive. It took me away from the chaos in my mind.

A gentle grasp on my chin had me turning to look upwards, Bruce's face flushed and focused on my own, open and trusting. He needed to see the obvious, that I trusted him to take care of me. He pulled and I followed, sitting up on my elbows, coming up to his shoulder level, our faces inches apart, enveloped in the unique, intense scent of his herbal tea. It was a tart, strong smell and it suited his quiet but passionate character.

Once, twice, I caught my eyes sliding to his plump lips. They looked far too appealing in this position. I usually strategically stayed away from positions so compromising, fearing the very thing that I'd already let happen, however this time the atmosphere was different. We stood on ambiguous grounds, waiting for Bruce to make a decision.

The man wasn't stupid, he saw the way I looked at him. The nightmares and inability to take a break from life put a significant dent in my resolve to keep a distance between us, romantically - I could have settled even for a pity kiss, a pity fuck. Anything to put my brain on pause.

His lips were softer than I had imagined. Skilled, too, he easily steered the kiss into the shallow waters of our combined longing.

With Tony, it was like an avalanche. Tony ran hot like Peterbilt engines, hard and fast, almost angry in his race for satisfaction. Tony was a man that was used to getting whatever he wanted and it became plainly obvious when we fucked.

Bruce was the opposite. He savoured the kiss, losing himself in a way that could almost be described as delicate. Bruce was humming, softly, as we tasted each other, holding the left side of my face with careful fingertips. Almost as if he was afraid to break me. The feel of his skin on mine was soothing in a way that made me sigh and relax even further.

"Wanna make you feel good." His voice had dropped, gone husky, but his breathing held even. He must know all about self-control.

"Yeah," I was ready to agree with whatever the fuck he was offering. My eyelids remained shut.

THE TAG LIST IS NOW OPEN! @another-stark-sub ​ @mostly-marvel-musings  @vozit ​ @littlegasps ​ @pilloclock ​ @shereadsinquiet @downeyreads ​ @hermione-grangers-wife ​ @individualistfem ​ @sleep-i-ness @capbrie @lillsxd @agustdowney @dee-vn @justanotherblonde23 @fanngirl19 @persephonehemingway @softie-socks @schemefrenzy @letsby @cutenessloading @romeo-the-cactus @jelly-fishy-babie

PS. Letsby, please don't combust. The underwear is coming off in the next chapter. 😶

[mustlovemustypages]

Yuletide 2020 Letter

Dear potential writer,

I truly hope all is well with you and yours. No matter what state you find yourself in, my wish is that Yuletide boosts your spirits and gives you the extra jolt we all could use to usher in the new year. 

Thank you for taking the time to read my letter and thank you in advance if you decide to write anything for me!

Below are my desired fandoms and pairings along with story ideas that I would love to see written. Please don’t feel stifled by my prompts; I’ve also listed my general likes and dislikes at the very bottom of this letter if you decide to go a different route.

Little Women (2019):

Characters: Amy March and Theodore “Laurie” Laurence”

The main reason I adore this adaptation is because it made me see why Amy and Laurie ended up together. They had very similar worldviews and fit so well what the other needed. Both deserved to be with someone that valued them for who they are. With Laurie, Amy was not just financially secure but with someone who encouraged her to express herself creatively, politically, or however she chose. With Amy, while she grounded Laurie in reality and challenged him to be the best version of himself, he didn't have to fundamentally change to make her happy.

Story ideas:

These quotes really show how Amy's perspective on life was different than her sister's: "You are your family's hope." (Aunt March) "I’ve always known I would marry rich." (Amy March) That's a lot of pressure on someone so young. We heard some of Laurie's thoughts, mostly that he didn't think Amy should feel ashamed for wanting that. How would some of that pressure continue even after she got married, and what would Laurie say to make her realize they were in life together as a team and she didn’t have to suffer the weight of the world alone?

The conversation between Amy and Laurie in the painting studio showed just how level-headed and intelligent she was. Laurie, while not wholly agreeing, was respectful and didn't discount her thoughts. It would be interesting to see the impact on their story if Vaughn hadn't arrived, and this had played out more. Would the proposal have happened earlier and/or how would later scenes be altered as a result of further conversation?

What did the other characters think of Amy and Laurie's relationship, and how did it change after seeing them interact more as a couple? It would be interesting to read about Meg, Marmee, John, or some of the other characters realizing they were genuinely a good match for each other.

Post-canon, I'd love to get a glimpse of what kinds of conversations they had. Did Amy encourage Laurie to pursue a career and find what he was passionate about (music perhaps as Laurie mentioned writing an opera)? And similarly, did Laurie encourage Amy to pursue her art? Did they continue to have in-depth conversations about societal pressures and expectations of gender in certain economic classes?

Tenet:

Characters: The Protagonist, Kat, and Neil

Tenet is the first movie I've seen in theaters since Star Wars IX. There have been some mixed reviews, but my love for Christopher Nolan sci-fi films combined with the experience of stepping foot in a theater again made it a wonderful experience for me. Sure, the plot could be confusing at times, but it was fun trying to fit certain puzzle pieces together and oh so thrilling when things just clicked into place in the most satisfying ways.

I adored the dynamic between Neil and the Protagonist. The easy friendship, the banter, the suits... everything. I also loved the relationship between the Protagonist and Kat. It started off as each using the other but transformed into one of genuine care on both sides. Ever the romantic, I definitely saw something more than just friendship between the two and was slightly disappointed the movie didn't explore that aspect more.  

For pairings, I’m interested in friendships between all of the characters. I’d be interested in seeing a romantic relationship between Kat and the Protagonist if you’re up for that, but not between Neil and Kat, nor Neil and the Protagonist. If you really want to give a romantic partner to Neil, I'd be fine with Laura (or an original female character if she’s not the focus of the story), but please, no slash. While I’d be ecstatic to see all three characters together, if you can only find a way to fit in two, that’s wonderful as well!

Story ideas:

Even though Andrei Sator is gone, there are still other players in the game, some like Priya, who want to eliminate Kat or even abduct her with the delusional idea she can continue her husband's work. The Protagonist (and Neil, if you so choose) ensures no harm comes to her, and he realizes that keeping her at a distance may not have been the best idea.

I personally don't buy into the fan theory that Neil is Kat's son Max; however, I do find the idea intriguing and would be up for reading about how that worked. The Protagonist breaks his rule and sees Kat, helping to raise her son Max/Neil and eventually teaching him about inversion.

The Protagonist doesn't have to wait quite as long as he'd thought to see Neil again. It can be the Neil who had already met him and knows about Tenet or the Neil who knows nothing about inversion.

What conversations did Neil and Kat have while the Protagonist was asleep after almost freezing to death? Maybe Neil explained the finer workings of Tenet and inversion more in-depth. Perhaps they discussed the Protagonist. 

Clueless:

Characters: Cher Horowitz and Josh Lucas

This movie set the bar high for teen romantic comedies. How can anyone ever beat 90s Alicia Silverstone and Paul Rudd? Plus, the relationship between their two characters is fantastic. Josh and Cher just bring out the best in each other. Cher shows Josh that he doesn't need to be so serious all of the time and that people are more than their outer appearances. Josh makes Cher want to be a better person, and he believes that she's not just a pretty face. Their banter and playful moments always make me smile.

Story ideas:

Knowing Josh and Cher end up together, this brings a heightened awareness to rewatches. They have so many casual touches and exchanged glances (when did Paul Rudd's eyes get so blue?) that it's hard to miss their natural chemistry. It may take quite some time for Cher's dad to notice anything has changed because they don't act all that different from before. Is there something that makes him finally take notice? How does he react?

Sort of related to the last prompt, there's a moment where Josh decides to go to the dance to keep an eye on Cher and Christian, and you can tell by Mel Horowitz’s smirk he realizes Josh has a crush on Cher. Does he do anything to push it along or play matchmaker just like his daughter?

I've always been curious about whether or not Josh believes Cher's story about being assaulted in the car by Elton and then held at gunpoint. We skip over Josh pulling up to the phone booth and go straight to Cher already being in the car. How did Josh react when she reiterated the story, and does he instantly believe her, or does it take some convincing? I'd like to see if he comforts her and if they both go together to tell Cher's dad what happened.

Cher is obviously very intelligent socially, if not always so much academically. When it comes time to apply for college, what does she major in? And how is Josh a positive influence in Cher's life, encouraging her to be ambitious and not letting negative comments from guidance counselors or teachers dissuade her?

Things I don’t like:

Alternate Universes – For the specific fandoms that I picked, I really like the universes as they are. I’m definitely okay with deviations from canon, but please don’t make Little Women into a supernatural werewolf story or have Tenet take place in a mundane coffee shop setting. (I don’t mind Soulmate AUs or something similar because those can be incorporated into canon with little change to worldbuilding).

Non-Con/Rape/BDSM/Sexual Violence/Graphic Sex – I like my characters to be happy and everything within ships to be 100% consensual, no question about it (mentions of non-con if it occurred in canon is fine). I also prefer plot over porn, especially with one-shots.

OT3s – Two people per romantic relationship, please. Any more than that makes me uncomfortable.

Character Bashing - Unless a character is a bad guy in canon, I don’t want to read hundreds of words about how awful they are, especially if they are one of the characters that I requested. Don’t take it out on the characters. If you hate my pairings, just write gen.

Things I love:

Hurt/Comfort – There is nothing I love more than one character comforting another. The hurt can be physical, psychological, or both.  

Happy Endings – I’m all for the realistic endings… but if they could be plausible AND at least happy-ish, that would be amazing.

Expanded Scenes/Contorting Canon – Feel free to expand scenes and change up the canon to your heart’s content as long as it makes logical sense.

Humor/Banter/Snark – I thrive on this stuff.

Bonding/Building Relationships – Whether it be a friendship or a romantic relationship, I adore reading about two people growing closer together. When characters know each other so well that they can have conversations with just their eyes or anticipate the person’s next move (especially if it’s to the surprise/confusion of everyone around them), my shipper heart is thrilled.

Dark to Light – Seeing a character come out of a bad mindset or situation and get better is so satisfying.

Happy writing and I hope you get the Yuletide gift of your dreams!

- Maddy @mustlovemustypages (on Tumblr, Ao3, and FF.net)

[vegetacide]

TaG: Bloodlines (Part 5)

Veg • notables: Any errors in this are strictly my own

Ty to @gumnut-logic and @scribbles97 for the brainstorming help and the encouragement.

Previous: Part 1 | Part 2 Bit 1 & Bit 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Rating and General warning: Mature content head. If you are not a fan of medical issues of a female nature in relation to pregnancy please proceed with caution.

Characters: Virgil, Kayo, (V/K)…

Location: TaG-verse AU | Auckland Gen.

E N J O Y

8-8-8

Part 5 - Kesan

The room grew incredibly and uncomfortable quiet as soon as the Doctor left and Kayo idly fingered the gold band that encircled her ring finger.

Of all the things she could have done and had done; keeping things from Virgil was one that she hadn’t actively participated in since becoming a couple. Total transparency had been one of the fundamental elements of their relationship.

Sure they sometimes kept things to themselves for a bit until they could process but they always went to each other to discuss whatever was bothering them. And here she was going against one of the main tenants they’d built their whole life together on. All due to fear of worrying him unnecessarily.

She’d fallen back on old habits that she’d sworn she wouldn’t ever resort to again. Holding stuff back from her family had only resulted in unnecessary pain and mistrust. Though none of the brothers would admit that trust had been lost, she knew there had been some that had slipped out of her reach.

Looking at the heavy boots of her lover and confidant Kayo couldn’t figure out where to start to repair the damage she had done. Probably leading with an apology would be the best bet but she wasn’t sure if Virgil was ready to hear her.

She forced her mouth to move and head to rise. She was a Kyrano, damn it and she would face this mess head on just like she’d be taught all those years ago.

“Virgil…”

He held a hand up and stepped up to her side, taking her elbow to help her to her feet. “I don’t want to discuss it right now. We need to get you home and in bed before our security detail has kittens. We’ve been here long enough.”

God, that hurt.

Getting her feet under her, she leaned into her husband and pushed to her feet. Wobbling a bit as the room fogged out a bit around the edges.

Virgil sighed, steadied her and in an easy movement of one used to carting people’s broken bodies around he scooped her up into his arms as if she weighed no more than a feather.

Kayo, thanked him and he shrugged it off as he stepped through the door to the ensuite bathroom and set her down on the toilet.

“Do you want me to stay or…?” He asked, looking around the small space and poking at the shower controls.

Kayo contemplated her options but she really didn’t want to be alone with her thoughts right now. As much as it pained her to have to see the hurt shadowing her husband’s eyes she didn’t trust herself to be able to keep her feet firmly under her.

“Stay...please.”

Virgil gave a curt nod and rolled up his sleeves, the corded muscles of his forearms flexing as he folded the fabric out of the way. “Shower?” He questioned, bobbing his head in the direction of the open faced enclosure.

“Please.”

He turned his broad back and started to fiddle with the controls. Adjusting the temperature and pressure settings until he was satisfied.

Kayo took a moment to look around the tiled space. It was tastefully decorated but completely functional. A full length mirror took up one wall to help dispel any claustrophobia. The colours were all warm toned and pleasing patterns. The lines; all clean and easy to maintain but with an air of elegance.

There was a charming framed print just inside the door out of the way of any of the mandatory grab bars and emergency assistance buttons. Though as she inspected it she wasn’t so sure it was a print…

Basically the place was designed to comfort those that could afford it with no expense spared. The tile flooring beneath her bare feet was even heated and it spoke to how adequately financed the hospital was.

Probably helped that Tracy Industries had made various large donations over the years… not that the general public knew that.

Wishing to break the uncomfortable silence, she pointed to the painting. “Is that real?”

Virgil stole a quick look at it before pursing his lips and nonchalantly shrugging. “Yes, though not one of that artist’s better known work or best for that matter.”

Reaching over her head, he plucked a towel off a wooden linen shelf and set it on the counter before taking her arm and guiding her back to her feet.

“All set. You read to go?”

She indicated that she was and Virgil pulled the ties of her johnny loose and slipped it from her arms.

“Do you need the …?”He indicated the toilet and she shook her head.

“I’m fine, I just want to clean up and get out of here.”

Kneeling down he made quick work of her undergarments, throwing away anything that needed disposing off quickly and efficiently. His own medical training and detachment to what he saw taking firm hold over his emotions.

“I second that notion..” He mumbled leading her over to shower. He eyed the stall a moment, seemed to decide something and shucked his own clothing to step in behind her.

“One can never be too clean.” He commented off handedly, bracing her with his strong hands on her slender hips.

The water was just the right temperature and she couldn’t resist moaning as it hit her skin. Warm water cascaded down and washed away the evidence of the day, circled around her feet and down the drain and she tried to watch it in a detached way.

Feeling her resolve to keep it together starting to shatter she reached for the soap but Virgil beat her too it. Taking the bar between his hands he lathered it up and started the process of cleaning her. He was meticulous, soaping up every inch of her from her toes to her thighs and back down again.

There was nothing sexual to it, just caring determination that she had a hard time processing considering the wound she had inflicted.

Looking anywhere but at her husband and she tried to contain herself but it was a losing battle and she didn’t think she had the energy reserves to keep up the front.

Virgil pressing up against her back and kissing the crown of her head was her undoing. It was as if he had sensed her teetering and he knew exactly what she needed.

The unwanted tears she’d been holding back finally escaped down her cheeks and she sagged against him, his arms encircling her waist and pulling her close.

“I’m so sorry.” She whimpered and he held on tight while she cried into the shower.

An incoming message pinged as a chipped cup was raised to thin lips.

Eyes of an unnatural chartreuse, flashed a malcontent yellow. Bionics rings that lined one iris glowing dangerously bright as a flare of anger sparked to life.

Narrow lips pulled back in a snarl of disgust and his cup was sent sailing. Blistering tea splashing in a blood like spray across a stained wall and dripping on to the floor to mix with putrid waste that littered the illegal café.

The burned out grunt manning the counter bulked in retaliation at the adverse display of destruction. Stepping around the counter with the intent of confronting the offender.

Malice filled eyes turned to him and all thoughts of bravery fled. The narcotics devotee just barely this side of sober latching onto his instinctual response of self preservation that the evil before him threatened.

Like the cockroach he was, scabby skinned and oily he scampered away, hands up in a weak display of surrender. Slinking back behind his offensive counter; a feeble block of dry rot and duct tape placed between him and the cloud of disrepute that encompassed the back corner of the store.

Snarling teeth ground and gnashed in hatred and the long, clean agile fingers that protruded from tatted fingerless gloves threw up a dark web portal beside the offending information.

Orders sent were blunt; concise and decidedly wicked. A plan was forming and the evil snarl turned up into an unholy grin. More information would be needed. It was always needed but the source this time could be one of his own making and his pawns would fall into place.

After many years of trying, a solution and an end appeared to finally be within sight.

The light of the console before him flickered and changed as coded responses started to scroll by. Looking up across the so-called establishment to the waste of skin and bone shivering behind the counter, he pushed from his station and stood...

8-8-8

TBC

NEXT

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

A Place To Call Home: Christmas Vacation

Summary: The Pads have some news that may end up changing the family. When the reader discovers how it all came about though, she has some words for her father and soon, for her new friend, Cody…

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x foster daughter!reader

Square: Christmas

Word Count: 17,500ish

Warnings: language, angst, fluff

A/N #1: I know I said I wouldn’t be doing more but here’s a little (okay, big) present for you guys! This part takes place right before and right after the very end of the Home timestamp...

A/N #2: Written for @spngenrebingo​

_______

“Hey, Jared,” you said, popping your head into the office. He gave you a smile from the couch as you followed the doctor inside and took a seat beside him.

“Nice to see you again, Y/N. It’s been quite awhile since you joined Jared for a session,” said the doctor, Michael was his name you thought.

“Yeah. Uncle Jared and I talk a lot outside of therapy nowadays,” you said.

“Jared’s told me so. I encourage you both to continue to do so. We’ve both recognized changes in him since you’ve started to regularly open up to one another,” he said.

You turned your head, Jared shrugging. Sure, he seemed happier than when you first met him years ago but he didn’t bury himself with work and travel all the time now. He was home more and enjoying life. You felt like all you did was complain about this or that or the next thing to him.

“But Jared wanted to discuss something that he felt might need a moderator,” said Michael. “I understand you’ve spoken to Y/N’s parents about this as well?”

“Yeah,” said Jared, turning to you with a smile. “Yeah, I’ve...talked to your parents about this, kiddo. Gen knows too for obvious reasons but...we talked to them and I’d like your perspective on something if that’s okay.”

“Always,” you said. “What’s up?”

“So…” he said, biting his bottom lip. “Gen and I, we’re considering...adopting a boy.”

“Really?” you asked, a smile growing on your face. “That’s…”

You bit your lip to match his, smiling as you stared at your lap.

“I see why you thought a moderator might be helpful,” joked Michael. “Y/N do you want to say anything about that?”

“I’m so proud of you to even consider it,” you said, grinning when you caught the instant smile on his face. “Sorry, I know that sounds weird but like I’m proud of you? And you’re an unbelievable dad and any kid would be lucky to have you be their dad, to have you and Gen both.”

“Thanks, kiddo,” he said, glancing at Michael. “We...he’s actually not that much younger than you actually. He’s twenty three, he’s a police officer, just started.”

“Oh,” you said, still smiling. “I...I suppose I’m slightly confused how you guys met but...I think if you want to adopt him that’s awesome.”

“I think I’ve heard it from you enough to know that it doesn’t matter how old you get,” he said.

“You still want a family,” you said. “I’m really happy for you Uncle Jared.”

“I guess we know what it’s like to have that instant click with a kid,” he said.

“How’d you meet him? If that’s okay?” you asked. Jared tilted his head. 

“Your dad really didn’t tell you?”

Two Hours Later

“Jensen!” you shouted when you walked into their house, JJ wide eyed as she spun back around in the kitchen. “Where. Is. He.”

“Backyard with your children?” she asked. “Uh, you look pissed.”

“I-” you started, your mom walking out of the bedroom with a soft smile. “What-”

“Been a long time since you called dad that,” she said. 

“Instinct of rage,” you said, blinking slowly. “I need to talk to him. Now.”

“Swing set with the babes,” she said. You took off towards the back porch, grabbing JJ’s wrist along the way. “JJ, please make sure she doesn’t murder your father.”

“Dad’s on his own with this,” she said. You went outside with her, your dad all smiles as he pushed Allie on the swing gently, Colin settled on his hip.

“Hey guys, mommy’s home!” he said, Allie hopped off and ran over to you, her hug and smile making you forget your anger for a moment.

Colin smiled and reached out for you. Your dad knew you were mad but he also knew handing the kids off got him a chance to get out of there.

“Hi baby boy,” you said, giving him a kiss as your dad took off.

“JJ, get him,” you said. Your dad stared at her and then cocked his head at you.

“Really?” he said. “She’s not as scary as you.”

“Hey!” she said, walking up behind him, yelping when he threw her over his shoulder. “Dad!”

“Oh that was way too easy. You’re taking that same defense class your mom and sister took little lady,” he said.

“Dad,” you said, bending down to scoop up Allie, giving her a hug. “We’re talking later.”

“Yeah, sure thing, tall munchkin.”

You got the kids back home for their normal evening routine before they were in bed. TJ was playing some video games when you left him, nearly getting you to stay home when he came up with an interesting bet for a race but you needed to talk to your dad and you wanted to do it three hours ago.

You walked around the street corner and were walking in the front door within three minutes, Zeppelin wolfing down a bag of Cheetos in the kitchen like he’d never seen food before.

“How’s the start of puberty going?” you asked with a smirk.

“I’m hungry like all the freaking time,” he said, wiping off his hands. “And washing your face everyday sucks and the whole thing is just bad. If I’m anything like dad, I won’t even get tall for like five years.”

“At least you’re not poor Arrow,” you said.

“I know. She told me she had her first period last month,” he said. You stared at him, pursing your lips. “Am I not supposed to know that?”

“No. I mean, she can tell whoever she wants. Obviously don’t tell other people. It’s just sweet to see you two are just as close as ever,” you said.

“Apparently it feels like dying,” he said.

“It does...and then you have a child and then you actually know what it feels like to be dying and then you go back to having a period which is just awesome,” you said with a laugh. “Sorry. Too much info.”

“No, it’s cool,” he said. “It’s nice having an older sister to talk to about stuff.”

“Puberty?” you said, Zeppelin nodding, a question on his face. You nodded and you followed him upstairs to his room, letting you shut the door. “Zepp, you know you can always talk to dad and mom about this stuff. Growing up is weird. I mean, mom gave JJ and Arrow this book they have for girls that teaches you about your body. I don’t know if there’s a book out there like that for boys but you can always ask dad or call up TJ or Uncle Jared. There’s people around to talk to.”

“Can I ask you like...stuff,” he said.

“Sure. I won’t tell mom or dad, you know that,” you said.

“Is it weird that...in the morning stuff down there is starting to like...” he asked.

“No,” you said with a laugh. “No, dude. That’s perfectly normal for boys. It’s gonna stick around for a while so get used to it.”

“How do you get it to go away?” he asked.

“Hi guys,” said your dad, poking his head in the room thankfully. “What are you two up to behind closed doors?”

“Well you can either deal with me or tell Zepp how to get rid of his morning...surprise,” you said. He shut his eyes and put his hands over his ears, quickly grabbing your arm and leading you out. “You’re weak.”

“Nope. Nope. Nope,” said your dad, pulling you down the hall. “He’s eleven and you’re still my sweet innocent baby boy aren’t you, Zeppy. Never change, buddy.”

“Don’t avoid the conversation,” you said, following him down the stairs and onto the back porch.

“Oh, I’ll avoid it as long as I can,” he said.

“Zepp or me?”

“I’m not going to discuss your brother’s...we had a little talk after they got that one at school. Maybe I forgot to mention morning wood and that the same way you get it to go up is how it goes down but I’m sure the kid will figure it out in a few years,” he said. “Many, many years.”

“Dad,” you said. “You’ve been avoiding me all afternoon.”

“You seem...angry. It seemed like the smart move,” he said. 

“Do we run away from our problems?” you said.

“I ain’t five, kiddo,” he said.

“Then maybe you’ll tell me what the Ackles-Hanover Adoption program is,” you said. You stared at him, a flicker of concern on his face that started to grow. “Dad.”

“I...it was supposed to be a surprise,” he said.

“You made a charity, with my name on it,” you said. “One hell of a surprise.”

“I...Jared said he explained what it does. I don’t understand why you’re upset,” he said softly.

“You don’t understand why I’m upset?” you asked. “Seriously?”

“It’s meant to help kids and young adults that age out of foster care find parents and get adopted, even if they’re an adult. You don’t stop wanting a family that won’t throw you away,” he said.

“I understand the point of your charity,” you said, standing up and crossing your arms, staring out the screen porch to the dark yard. “You just...you don’t understand. I thought you did but you don’t.”

“Kiddo,” he said, standing up, giving you a hug from behind. You shrugged him off, glaring at him. “I’m sorry.”

“Hey,” said your mom, stepping onto the porch, pointing a finger at you. “You’re not a child. Don’t act like one.”

“You don’t even know what we were talking about,” you said, rolling your eyes. 

“Your father is having a bad day. Cut the shit,” she said, heading back inside. You looked over at him. He wrinkled his nose and shook his head.

“I’m fine,” he said. 

“Was it...cause of-”

“No. It was this morning. Really, it’s fine,” he said.

“We can talk about the charity thing tomorrow,” you said.

“Okay.”

“Do you want to go play Mario Kart?” you asked. He smiled, giving you a light nod. “After you tell me what happened.”

“Y/N, nothing-”

“Mom’s never acted like that which means it scared her,” you said. 

“Don’t tell your siblings,” he said with a sigh.

“Are you sick?” you swallowed.

“No, kiddo. There was a name mix up on some test results this morning was all. I am perfectly one hundred percent okay,” he said. 

“But you thought you were sick?” 

“For like an hour,” he said with a smile.

“How sick?”

“It doesn’t-”

“If you do ever get sick, you call me,” you said. “Don’t keep it from me.”

“Sort of my call kiddo,” he smiled.

“No,” you said, shaking your head. “No. It’s not. You tell me. Promise.”

“I’m okay. I promise. Allie and Colin cheered me up so much when I was still bouncing back so you still helped me out today,” he said.

“I’m sorry I came in like that, acting like a brat,” you said, rubbing your arm.

“Brat’s are spoiled children. You’ve never been one of those,” he said. “Come on, let’s go kick the twins asses in a team race.”

“I’m home,” you said, sighing as you wandered into your bedroom, ditching your clothes by the laundry basket and tugging on one of TJ’s shirts. He was reading in bed, glancing over the top of his book when you crawled in beside him.

“You talk with your dad about whatever it is you won’t talk about?” he asked, flipping a page.

“TJ,” you said, eyes flicking up to meet his.

“That’s a no,” he said, setting the book down and turning off the light. He shifted down the bed, tucking you into his chest. “You’ve been jittery and pissed and more jittery ever since you got home from Jared’s session. Did he say something?”

“He told me something my dad is doing,” you said, closing your eyes. “I don’t wanna talk about it.”

“Sweetie.”

“Mhm?” you hummed.

“You should talk to Jensen,” he said.

“I don’t want to get in a fight,” you said.

“You’re gonna sleep like shit and I can already see whatever this is festering in your head. Deal with it, honey,” he said.

“Well I’m not getting dressed,” you said. He rolled over and grabbed his phone, turning back a moment later.

“He’ll be here in a minute,” he said.

“Had to marry a sweet boy, didn’t I,” you grumbled, rolling out of bed and pulling on some shorts, TJ smiling as you went out to the family room.

“Hey,” said your dad three minutes later sporting his own pajamas, popping in through the front door and kicking off his sneakers. “TJ said you needed to talk to me.”

“Please sit down,” you said. He took a seat in his normal spot on the couch, watching you walk around and settle in the other corner. “I’m sorry for earlier, saying you didn’t understand.”

“That’s okay, honey,” he said. “I probably don’t. I don’t understand why you’re upset so you probably have a point.”

“Dad,” you said, both your heads turning when you saw Allie stop on the landing of the stairs. “What’s up, alligator? You should be sleeping and not on the stairs.”

“I wet the bed,” she said, blushing when she saw your dad there. 

“S’okay, sweetie,” you said as you stood up. “I’ll be back in five.”

“Take your time,” he said. You went back upstairs with Allie and got her in a fresh diaper and pajamas and put new sheets on the bed, still ever grateful to your mom for the advice on the mattress protector. 

“Okay, you’re all set now,” you said, tucking her back in bed, giving her a kiss as you turned off her light.

“Mommy?” 

“Yeah?” you asked.

“I love you,” she said.

“I love you, gorgeous,” you said, giving her another hug and round of kisses. “Get some sleep.”

She was conked out by the time you were pulling the door shut, your dad stretched out on the couch and staring at the ceiling when you got back.

“Sorry about that,” you said. 

“She’s not in diapers at night?” he asked.

“She’s barely two, dad,” you said. “Of course she’s still in diapers.”

“When did you get so old?” he said, turning his head with a smile. 

“First off, 26 dude. Second, you look at me sometimes like I’m a little girl you know,” you said. 

“Cause you’re my first baby girl. A part of me will always think that,” he said as he sat up, watching you settle back in your spot. “If the charity...we can pull the plug on it if you want. I don’t want it to upset you.”

“You all see all the good that could come from something like that. I get it. I see it too. You have an excellent point about people still wanting families after aging out of the system. I think it’s very noble in that way.”

“But,” he said.

“But I see all the ways it can go wrong and there are so, so many ways it can go wrong, dad. These people...they got issues. You know first hand what it’s like. I just see the ways they can get hurt and these people already hurt. You get one person doing it for the wrong reasons-”

“I know. We’ve talked about all that. But there’s a difference between this charity and foster care. The adults, they can walk away. It’s not like when you were a kid and got in a bad home and were stuck. These people can walk away and even then, it’ll never be like that. All families looking to adopt will be screened. This isn’t a small thing, kiddo. It’s...it’s been in the works a few years,” he said.

“Years,” you said, closing your eyes. “I shouldn’t be surprised anymore but you continue to do so.”

“That first year was the scariest. That first month was the scariest, when you first came to us. I remember,” he said.

“Even adopting Allie and being a mom to her and Colin, that’s scary but it’s not the same,” you said, peeling open your eyes. “At least with that it’s me and TJ and we got our family behind us.”

“Do you think you would have wound up with TJ if you’d just, aged out of the system?” asked your dad. “Like if you went to school together still?”

“I don’t think so,” you said, leaning back and tucking your legs in to your chest. 

“Why not?”

“I was too broken before,” you said quietly, glancing at your toes. “A lot got fixed before I met him. I think he would have taken one look at me and thought-”

“I’m gonna marry that girl someday,” you heard, your gaze going up, TJ leaning against the wall, giving you a sad smile. “I brought you over here to kiss and make up, not make her feel worse, Jensen.”

“The point I was trying to make, dofus, was that you have loved her from day one,” said your dad with a smirk back at TJ. “And that she was the one that asked you out. She was the one that kept herself doing well in school. She’s the one that never let boys take advantage of her. She’s the one that told me five minutes of moving in exactly what she needed from me, even if she didn’t know it. You’ve always done the hard and scary thing, kiddo. There’s a lot of other kids like you out there. They just want someone to call on a bad day, some place to go have Sunday dinner, people that are theirs. It’s going to be scary for them too. But you know what it’s like to be on the other side of it now. I think you’d do it again if you knew what the end result was going to be.”

“Yeah, I’d do it all in a heartbeat,” you said.

“Mom and I just want to help the kids that didn’t get picked. None of those kids got thrown away. They just haven’t found their right family yet,” he said.

“Seriously though, you like, work for hallmark on the side and just don’t tell anyone, right?” said TJ.

“TJ’s the one that ate the last of your mint ice cream,” he said with a smile as he hopped up, TJ’s face falling.

“You’re dead to me, Ackles,” he said.

“Oh, it’s adorable when he’s all angry,” said your dad, pinching his cheek as he went past.

“You’re a dickhead,” he said.

“Well I’ve known that for years,” he laughed as he pulled on his shoes. “We okay now, sweetie?”

“Yeah,” you said with a nod, getting up and wrapping your arms around TJ. “If...if even just one person gets something out of it, then that’s okay with me.”

“It’ll be a while before it goes public but the few test cases are working out so far. One of the sets of parents are even starting adoption which for an adult, is way quicker,” he said.

“Jared said he and Gen…” you trailed off. 

“They’re one of the test cases. A newer one but they’ve been hanging out with Cody. He’s...he’s very much like you, Y/N. The Pads are inviting him to come up to the vacation house with everyone for our trip in a few weeks. I think maybe you two should talk, tell him about the brighter side of life,” he said.

“When’d he go in?” you asked.

“You can ask him yourself in a few weeks,” he said, giving you both a hug. “Night guys.”

Three Weeks Later

“Oh my God,” you groaned, dropping another bag out of the trunk of the car, tilting your head back, quickly turning it into a smile when you saw Colin on JJ’s hip. “Well hey there big man. Look at you being a cutie with Aunt JJ.”

“Afh,” he giggled, rubbing his hands over JJ’s face.

“Come on, buddy,” said JJ, as she walked past with a backpack on her shoulders. “Let’s find you some milk.”

“His bottles should be in-”

“The green bag. I’ve babysat my nephew enough, sis,” she laughed. “Come on, Colin before you get eaten by a bear.”

“There better be no bears here,” you grumbled.

“Nope, just coyotes,” said Jared with a smirk as he came up behind you.

“Seriously? Thank you for easing my concerns with my toddler and infant,” you said, getting a hug from him and the rest of the crew, Tom already off looking for JJ. Your gaze went to the guy a little older and hanging back some, Gen pulling an arm around him and moving him forward.

“Cody, this is Y/N,” she said.

“She’s Ackles oldest. Y/N’s husband TJ’s around here with their other kiddo somewhere I’m sure,” said Jared.

He nodded and you returned it, a little tension running out of his shoulders.

“So, uh, let’s introduce you to everybody, hm?” 

“I’m glad we bought this place,” said your mom, taking Colin off your lap after a later dinner, a small rainstorm keeping everyone inside for the night. “Even if it is a bit outdated.”

“I’m sure we’ll get our use out of it over the years,” said TJ with a smile.

“Well I think the kids having their own room is nice. Gives the little one’s a quiet place to sleep,” said your dad, Allie passed out on his hip, her head on his shoulder. “Speaking of which, let’s go put the pups to bed, grandma.”

“Remember what I did to you last time you called me, Grandma, Jensen,” she said with a smirk.

“Oh. I remember. I’m hoping you do it again. Grandma,” he said, giving her a wink. You rolled your eyes as they left, your dad leaning down quickly. “Hey. Why don’t you guys see if you can get Cody to come out of his room. He’s been holed up in there since dinner.”

“We will. Night dad,” you said.

“Night,” they said as they took off. You gave TJ a smile as you stood and headed for one of the downstairs bedrooms, a small room but the bed was comfy and there was a private bath with it. You knocked once and pushed it open, Cody, laying in bed with his computer.

“Hey,” you said.

“Hey.”

“The old people are in bed and the pre-teens are off watching a movie up in the loft if you want to hang out with me and TJ,” you said.

“Thanks but I’m kind of tired,” he said. You nodded, shutting the door behind you. He watched you carefully as you sat down on the end of the bed.

“Isn’t the whole point of this program so you can be with your family? Get to know them, see if they’re a good fit for you?” you asked.

“I wasn’t thinking when my old case worker called me up and told me about it,” he said. “I don’t really care about these rich people or you so you can leave now.”

“Jared and Gen, they tell you anything about me,” you asked.

“Yeah. You’re the adopted girl,” he said, glancing over the screen.

“I was in the system for nearly eight years, Cody. Cut the shit,” you said.

“Been in since I was five, aged out. Looks like I win the sad sap award,” he said. You shut his computer, Cody narrowing his eyes at you. “How many homes?”

“14. You?”

“17. Winner again. Leave me alone.”

“Wow. You really are just like me,” you said.

“Uh no, you and me aren’t the same, princess,” he said.

“I ain’t a princess, jerk,” you said. “You’re not in foster care anymore so stop the games.”

“Oh, because I’m sure you were adopted for you,” he said, rolling his eyes. “You sure those two kids out there are even the other guys? Or are they new daddy’s little-”

“You can shut the fuck up. That is not how people in this family talk to each other and for the record, asshole, I adopted my daughter after some other assholes left her in a box to die. She’s lucky my husband and I even found her. I am close with my father because he is my father and he’s helped me stop being an asshole like you and he’s shown me how to be a good person. That’s who we are. You don’t want a family, fine. There’s the fucking door,” you said, leaving and slamming his shut.

You were fuming by the time you got to the end of the hallway, hands in fists, your dad poking his head over the upstairs balcony.

“What was that?” he asked.

“That kid’s got a mouth on him,” you grumbled.

“Go get an apology then,” he said. “He’s not a child after all.”

“Yeah, that’ll go great,” you said. You sighed and went back down the hall, Cody missing from his room.

You went back to the living room, TJ watching the start of a movie.

“He ducked outside. I think he’s on the covered porch,” he said. You nodded, going past and out the back door, Cody sitting in a chair with his arms crossed, staring at the dark woods.

“I found the door,” he said, not bothering to look up. “I’ll be gone in the morning, don’t worry about it.”

“What’s the rule, Cody? The unspoken rule we have in foster care as the older kids.”

“Take care of the younger ones,” he said quietly.

“So you gonna let me take care of you or are you going to say something mean again because you’re scared?” you asked. “I know it’s an act. I’ve done it all so you want to pretend with everybody else, okay, but don’t do it to me. I know the difference.”

“Could you leave me alone?” he said. “You’re so freaking annoying.”

“Oh. You hurt my feelings there tough guy,” you deadpanned. “You ain’t getting out of this conversation.”

“I bet new daddy sent you out here huh,” he said.

“Well my new daddy sure is a hell of a lot better at knowing what to say than I am,” you mumbled, crossing your arms as you sat down in a chair. 

“This was a mistake,” he grumbled to himself.

“No, it’s not. You’re just scared and you want to runaway because you think you don’t fit in,” you said.

“Can you please be quiet for one minute?” he said.

You kicked your legs out in front of you, watching the rain fall and Cody debating getting up beside you.

“Do you remember them? Your parents?” you asked.

“Raised by grandparents. Mom didn’t want me and was dead by the time I was three anyways,” he said. “Never met my dad.”

“Jared’s a good dad. Gen’s a good mom too. There’s benefits to having younger parents,” you said.

“Like what?”

“Like you get two parents but you get two friends too...eventually,” you said, pursing your lip.

“I already got friends,” he said, turning his head. “I only did this as a favor for my case worker.”

“Back to the lying already?” you teased, slouching down in your seat. “Do yourself a favor, Cody. Give the Pads, give all of us, a sliver of trust. It’ll help.”

“I’m the rich people’s charity case,” he mumbled. “Princess.”

“Yeah, maybe I am quite a bit better off than most 26 year olds. I got a nice house, a new car, no student loan. I go on nice vacations with my family. Maybe I am the spoiled princess you think I am. And I would throw all of those things away in a heartbeat. It’s stuff, it doesn’t matter. The point of this house is for the people in it to have a good time and be a family and make memories. Sure, some rich people are stuck up snobs and sure, none of these guys, none of us kids, will ever have to worry about money. But they’re the kind of people that want you to text them that you got home safe. They will go to the end of the earth for you. They’re good.”

“Like I said, I ain’t drinking the kool aid they’ve been handing out,” said Cody.

“Okay,” you said. “Just saying is all.”

“Just saying what?”

“Just saying I don’t want to know what five more years of feeling alone would have done to me,” you said, turning your head to him. “A bit of advice though, Cody. Don’t ever say something like what you did to me before in front of my father, or Jared or anyone else here. You need someone to be the punching bag, okay. I can take it. Pretend with me so you can be the real you with them, alright?”

“Remember what I said about friends? Well you’re not one of them so leave me alone,” he said. He stood up and left and you saw a flashlight in the yard after a moment, quickly disappearing.

You sighed as you went inside, heading for the coat rack when TJ cocked his head.

“You want me to come?” he asked.

“No. This is something we need to figure out,” you said, zipping up your jacket.

“He doesn’t have the right to be mean to you,” he said.

“No. But he is allowed to be scared,” you said. “People mix those two up sometimes.”

“Don’t get lost. Or hurt,” he said.

“I won’t. Don’t stay up for me if I’m gone awhile, okay?”

“Yeah, like that’s gonna happen,” he said, smiling as you leaned over the couch to give him a kiss. “Go bring him back home.”

“I love you,” you smiled, kissing his cheek before you pulled on your boots and were out the door.

You walked around to the trail, rain coming down steady but it wasn’t freezing thankfully. You followed it until you got to the path to the lake and turned down there, smirking when you saw Cody sitting under the covered decking.

“Hey,” you said, Cody rolling his eyes at you. “Nice to see you too.”

“For fucks sake. What part of-“

“Contrary to what you may have experienced, people aren’t supposed to treat their kids like trash. They aren’t supposed to be cruel. You’re not supposed to be afraid of a hug. It’ll take time to unlearn all that crap. I’m nearly ten years into this Cody. I have lived almost more of my life with these people than with my birth parents. I tried to runaway when I got here. My seventeenth birthday I tried to run away. I tried to push them away. I wanted nothing to do with them. They wouldn’t let me give up and I’m not going to let you walk away because this is hard. It’s fucking hard and terrifying and it’s nothing any of them can understand properly. But I know you want this so I’m not going to let you just get through this vacation so you can run away when we all go home. It’s not happening.”

“Why do you even care?” he asked.

“Cause you’re my family.”

“The Padalecki’s aren’t even related to you,” he said.

“You don’t need to be related to someone for them to be your family. Trust me,” you said. “Just one thing, just tell me one thing that’s scaring you so I can try to help.”

He was quiet and looked out at the lake, his back to you for a few minutes.

“Sometimes I still feel like I'm a terrified five year old,” he said. You stepped beside him and nodded. “I don’t want to get hurt.”

“I get that,” you said quietly. “I used to be like that. Sometimes on bad days it creeps back in even.”

“How’d you not be like that?”

“Hey,” you heard behind you. You both spun around, Jared in a raincoat and sporting a concerned smile. “Everything okay?”

“Mhm,” you hummed, looking back to Cody. “Simple answer? They kind of beat me over the head with their love until I realized I was worth it. They’ll keep doing it, even on the bad days.”

“How…” he trailed off as you walked past Jared.

“I had a talk with my dad on a rainy night once,” you said with a smile. “You just got to be brave enough to believe what they say.”

Cody nodded, Jared giving you one of his own before he walked down towards Cody.

“Careful on your way up to the house, Y/N,” he said.

“I know. I’ll see you guys at breakfast.”

One Month Later

“Mam’,” you heard as you spun around at the bar. You smiled when you saw Cody in his uniform, another older officer with him.

“Hi. The ambulance just took away the guy with heat stroke. I think he was gonna be okay though,” you said.

“Hot day out,” said the other officer.

“You guys want a beer?” you said. “We got water if you’re on duty.”

“I would take a cold bottle of water if you’ve got one,” said the officer. You smiled and dug back into the cooler, pulling two out.

“On the house,” you said, handing one out to each of them. Cody nodded, the officer glancing back and forth between you.

“You two know each other or something?” he asked.

“Y/N’s that other ex foster kid I told you about,” he said quietly.

“Really? Glad Cody here has someone his own age to talk to about that sort of thing. Sometimes I get the feeling I don’t get told everything which is silly considering we’re partners,” he said.

“We should get back on patrol,” said Cody.

“Hey we’re due for our lunch break. Let’s grab a bite at that food truck outside,” he said. Cody sighed and followed him out, one of the summer hires taking over for you as you followed after them.

“What?” asked Cody, his partner already off and in line.

“I haven’t seen you around since vacation. You kind of kept your distance,” you said. 

“I told you. I don’t like you,” he said.

“Oh,” you said. “Uh, sorry.”

“Just forget about it,” he said, waving you off as he got in line. You went back inside and to the back of the brewery, trying to work on a few things in the office before you were over at the bags of hops and unloading them from a pallet.

“Well that’s never a good sign,” you heard. You stood up and spun around, your dad jogging over to give you a hug. “Hello tall munchkin. I love you.”

“Hi,” you said, going back to work when he released you.

“You only do this when you’re upset you know,” he said. “You and TJ have a fight?”

“No.”

“Something to do with work?”

“No.”

“Bad day?”

“No.”

“Do you know how to say anything besides no?”

“Dad,” you groaned.

“Come on, take your lunch break,” he said, grabbing your wrist. You went out to the back patio area for employees, your dad taking off towards his truck and returning after a moment with a pair of sandwiches from the store down the street. 

“Thanks,” you said, eating quietly, sharing a bag of chips with him. He frowned when you only ate half though and wrapped up the rest for later. “Dad.”

“You barely ate anything and TJ says you aren’t eating as much as normal,” he said. 

“Why the fuck do you two talk about that?” you snapped.

“Because it’s one of the obvious signs that something is going on with you. You’ve been funny since vacation. Quiet and sad and it’s got more than just me and TJ concerned,” he said. “You don’t need to ration food and you know it.”

“I’m not hungry,” you said.

“Are you sick?” he asked as he placed a hand on your forehead. 

“I’m not sick,” you said, his hand touching your cheek and neck before you stood up and walked away. “I have to get back to work.”

“That was ten minutes and last I checked our employees get hour lunches,” he said.

“Well I got shit to do,” you said as you stormed away.

“Y/N,” he said loudly, freezing you in place. You felt a hand run up and down your back, settling between your shoulder blades and rubbing in place there. “What happened with Cody? Did he say something or do something to you? You can tell us. You can just tell mom if you want. Just talk to someone, honey.”

“I screwed up,” you said shakily. “I didn’t talk to him right and he doesn’t like me and I tried to tell him this is a good family and I think all I did was push him away from it.”

“S’not your job to do that,” he said.

“You made me feel so at home though and loved and I screwed it up so wrong and how much am I screwing up Allie and Colin and everything else,” you said as you spun around. He tilted his head and gave you a sad smile, pulling you into a hug.

“You are a wonderful mother, honey. You love those two so much and I know they healed things in you the rest of us couldn’t touch. You are better than so many other parents out there,” he said. “You and TJ always put your kids first.”

“But I screwed up,” you said.

“No, you didn’t.”

“Yes, I did,” you said. You took a step back from him, pursing your lips. “I just want space, dad. Just give me some space.”

“Okay. Whatever you need to get your head on straight.”

“Hey, Jared,” you said, popping your head up when you saw him walk into your house the next day. 

“We were out on a run. TJ said we could grab a drink . Forgot our bottles at home,” he said.

“Mhm,” you hummed. “Take whatever you want.”

“Thanks,” he said as you went back to your notebook, glancing out the front window and pausing. “TJ out there teaching Allie how to wash the car?”

“Yeah. She’s got a little bit of a tomboy streak in her. Daddy’s girl,” you said.

“Well Colin is totally a momma’s boy, like his grandpa,” he laughed. “Where is the adorable babe?”

“He’s having a playdate with some friends of ours. They’re thinking of a kid so we said take him for the day, see what it’s like,” you smiled. You went back to writing in your notebook, feeling Jared behind you. “Yes?”

“You’re doing your notebook again,” he said.

“And?”

“Do you want to come to another session with me?”

“What is wrong with all of you lately?” you snapped. Jared held up his hands and backed away. “I got chores to do when I’m done with this so if you don’t mind…”

“Alright. Thanks for the water,” he said.

Two hours later you were huffing as you and TJ walked out to the driveway.

“Allie just got down for a nap. What are you so pissed about?” he asked.

“All I said was I was going to skip my session this week,” you said. “I’ve done it before.”

“Yeah, when we’re away or something pops up. You’ve never skipped because you don’t want to go,” he said.

“I’ve got stuff to do on Thursday.”

“Like what?” he said. “Does your work suddenly have some kind of rules against employees taking time in the day for that sort of thing because I seriously doubt your parents would-”

“I don’t want to fight. Just give me space,” you said as you started to head down the driveway.

“Where are you going?” he said.

“A walk to cool off. Don’t worry about me.”

You’d walked over to the park about a mile away and settled on a bench, one you normally used to watch Allie run around on the playground from.

“Y/N.”

You looked left and saw Cody in his uniform, Cody looking around before he took a seat.

“What do you want?”

“Your dad, your mom, your husband, Jared and Gen...they’re all concerned. They asked me to come find you,” he said.

“Well you found me,” you said. “Not that I was hiding.”

“What happened,” he said. “You’re not the confident chick that was saying all that stuff to me at the house anymore.”

“I never was,” you said.

“I never apologized for what I said. I’m sorry,” he said.

“A few mean words don’t get under my skin anymore, Cody,” you said.

“You sort of look forward to the words after a while. It used to beat the alternative,” he said. You glanced over at him, Cody raising an eyebrow. “I know you were in some very bad homes. I was in a few bad ones myself. I know what goes on in those ones. I know it fucks you up pretty good.”

“I jumped down your throat at the house about you opening up and all I did was push you away from a family. A really great family. I didn’t just hurt someone. I hurt someone like me. That’s the worst thing I’ve ever done in my life,” you said.

He stared at you for a moment, glancing down at his lap with a smile.

“How long has it been? About three weeks since the house?” he asked. You nodded, Cody sitting back against the bench. “Sort of been the best three weeks ever you know.”

You whipped your head up, Cody shrugging at you.

“I needed you to say that stuff to me Y/N. You’re right. I was fucking terrified. I think part of me will always keep a little of that fear if you’re anything to go by but I’ll forget about, it’ll just be there as a reminder of the old me. I’m sorry I was a dickhead and I’m sorry I haven’t talked to you about any of this since. I’ve been trying to figure it out in my head. It sounds like I’m the reason you’re acting like this lately.”

“I get...funny sometimes,” you said, rubbing your arm. “Scared.”

“Scared of what?”

“Scared that I don’t deserve the people I have in my life,” you said. “I know that’s not true but...I just get scared. I’m normally really good at pushing it back down and convincing myself that it’s just my head screwing with me but...you were too big a screw up. I did something so wrong.”

“No, you didn’t,” he said, resting his elbows on his knees, lowering his head. “I forgot the number one rule. The kids stick together.”

You nodded and gave him a half smile, Cody returning it.

“I want what you have, Y/N. I want it and I want parents and a family and to not feel like this shit is burying me everyday of my life. I’m so freaking tired of being alone. I’m not going to be perfect and you’re so much tougher than me cause you did it alone but...I need you to help me, help me not be so scared. I’m learning and it’s so slow but I think you can help me. But you got to keep calling me out on my shit. I don’t like being mean or making people feel bad about themselves. Everything has always come with a cost and I don’t know how to just take and not expect anything in return.”

“I can help,” you said. “I just...have to remember not to take everything you say to heart.”

“I’m sorry I said I don’t like you. The stuff about your dad too, that was out of line. I’m sorry,” he said.

“This is going to be one of the hardest things you do in your life, Cody. No one’s expecting you to be perfect. You never have to be perfect. Just try and be a little forgiving of us when we overreact or don’t say the right thing. We have to learn too,” you said.

“Why do you care so much about if this works out for me?”

“Everyone deserves a family, Cody.”

“Hey,” you said, giving TJ a smile when Cody dropped you off outside your house. He was pouting on the front porch, your dad out front with him. You saw your mom inside with Allie, getting a quick glance from her as you walked over. “Um...listen for a minute before you guys talk please. I...I thought...well I talked with Cody and...I knew exactly what I wanted to say in the car too.”

“Y/N,” said TJ. You gave him a soft smile, his face relaxing. “You seem like your old self again.”

“Cody and I...we...he...he’s going to be okay now,” you finally said. 

“Are you okay now?” asked your dad.

“Yeah,” you said, giving him a smile. “I used to make you feel bad, didn’t I. The things I used to say.”

“We thought we were hurting more than we were helping at the beginning. But we saw you trying and we knew that us just being afraid. You are not Cody’s responsibility though, Y/N. He’s a grown man,” said your dad.

“Yes, he is. He’s also a child,” you said, your dad leaning back in his seat. “I think like he does. I can help him. If I can help him make this process even a sliver easier, I’ll take a few crappy weeks to do it. He said the past few weeks have been some of the best he’s ever had. It’s worth it then.”

“I’m not trying to start anything, I just...why is what he’s feeling more important than what you are?” asked TJ.

“It’s not. I know from experience though, this is literally the hardest thing he’ll have ever done in his life so far. We can help him. But we can’t get mad when he makes mistakes. Yeah, he’s 23. He’s gone so long without unconditional love, I don’t think he knows what it even is anymore. So you guys gotta help too. I’m okay now, really. Maybe he’s not my responsibility but then again, I was never yours. No one made you take me. No one made the Pads take him. You both chose to help a kid. Now please help me help him.”

“Okay,” said your dad. “But anybody here sees you slip back even a little-”

“I know. I know. I got my head on straight now. I promise.”

Two Months Later

“Hey Jared,” you laughed into the phone, TJ still trying to tickle you. “Thomas James Hanover. You need to stop young man.”

“Make me,” he giggled as he plopped on top of you.

“Sorry, Jared. What’s up?” you asked, nothing but quiet breathing coming from the other end. “Jare, you there?”

“Yeah. Um...I...I got in a fight with Cody. He was hanging out and I invited him to do Christmas with us in a few weeks and he got really...defensive,” he said. “He kind of blew up.”

“He still there?” you asked, TJ sitting upright. 

“He was staying over tonight. His car’s still here but he went out on the back patio and…” he said, pausing in the background. “He’s twenty three and I’m still worried. I shouldn’t have...fuck. Happy Birthday kiddo. I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have called and-”

“Hey. It’s cool. I’ll be right over, okay? I’m not supposed to be at my parents until later,” you said.

“Y/N, you really don’t-”

“Jared,” you said. “It’s fine. I swear. I’ll be right there.”

You hung up and TJ stood up with you. You raised an eyebrow but he smiled.

“I’m coming with this time,” he said.

“Alright,” you said. It was only a two minute drive to Jared’s and you were quickly in their driveway, walking around the side of the house, the backyard dark. “Anyone-”

“Surprise!” you heard, nearly jumping straight back into TJ when the lights turned on. You groaned and tilted your head against his chest, a chuckle rumbling through the crowd, your dad cracking up as he walked over.

“Do you have any idea how hard it is to plan a surprise party for you?” he teased, kissing your forehead. “Happy Birthday, tall munchkin.”

“Losers. You’re all losers,” you said, your friends and family returning to milling about for the moment, Jared and Cody walking over with smirks. “You two...don’t you pull something like that again, got it?”

“Yeah, we got it,” said Jared. “I almost felt a little bad there until I remembered what I got you for a present. Totally makes up for it.”

“Mhm,” you said, looking at Cody. “What’s your excuse?”

“Uh...I...well I actually did talk to Jared and Gen about the holidays and…” he trailed off, looking at Jared. He smiled and threw an arm over Cody’s shoulders, giving him a squeezing hug.

“Somebody’s gonna have Christmas with us,” said Jared, Cody rolling his eyes. “We’re so happy he said yes.”

“It’s just a holiday,” said Cody with a shrug. 

“Hey, Cody, show me where to grab a beer around here,” said TJ, taking off with Cody.

“How’d he really take the being invited to Christmas thing?” you asked.

“He’s nervous. But he said he’d try. He didn’t want anything though so naturally we’re going to spoil him rotten,” said Jared with a big grin.

“Spoil ‘em a little. Sentiment means more than you realize with these guys,” said your dad, wrapping his arms around you, resting his chin on your shoulder. “Ain’t that right?”

“The old goot kind of has a point,” you said.

“I am fifty you little shit,” he said, waddling you over to the cake. “It’s just a sheet cake for everyone and then for the more refined tastes of certain family members...cookie cake is in the fridge.”

“Yes,” you said, getting a laugh from him. “So were you the mastermind behind this?”

“I can’t divulge my secrets,” he said, kissing your cheek. “Go on. Enjoy your party with your friends. You can hang out with your decrepit father later.”

“Still not old, dad,” you said with a smile. 

“Damn right I’m not,” he said.

“Mom,” you called, catching her laugh before she even got all the way over. “Dad’s extra clingy tonight.”

“Extra clingy every night,” he said, flashing her a wink.

“Excuse me while I go vomit,” you said, looking back over your shoulder. “Thanks guys.”

“Anytime, kiddo.”

“Thanks for the party,” you said, dropping off the kids overnight bag at your parents place a few hours later. “And for taking the kids for the night so we can have some adult time.”

“You mean so you can sleep in tomorrow?” teased your dad.

“One hundred percent,” you said, watching him follow you outside. “Forget something?”

“You got one more present,” he said, clasping his hands behind his back, a smirk on his lips.

“Dad. The wine and the headphones were more than enough. In fact it was too much. I really don’t need stuff. Spend it on the other guys, really,” you said.

“Oh but this is a...unique present. It’s for both of us actually. In fact, I can’t ever even give it to you,” he said.

“Did you get me a riddle?” you laughed. “I am so confused.”

“Come here,” he said, standing under the light on the covered front patio. You stood there with him, your dad holding up his left arm. You raised an eyebrow, the shirt sleeve riding up to show off his tattoos for JJ and the twins. He turned his arm over so you could see the inside of his bicep, a dark mark on his skin you’d never seen before.

It was a simple black heart shape and you got closer, the outline made up of two words.

“Tall munchkin,” you said quietly, biting your bottom lip when he smiled. “You got a tattoo for me.”

“About time I got one for all my kids. Sorry it took so long to figure it out, tall munchkin,” he said. You titled your head, pursing your lips. He put a hand on your head and ran it through your hair, ruffling it up before he tucked a few pieces behind your ear. “You like your last present?”

“Yeah,” you said. “No way you’re ever going to top that one though.”

“Challenge accepted,” he said. “Go on. Let TJ go be all romantic. Kid’s got a pretty sweet surprise at home for you.”

“Dad,” you said, getting a hum from him. “I don’t really say it a lot but thank you for being TJ’s dad too. He appreciates it more than he lets on.”

“I know. I know you take care of him too though,” he said, kissing your forehead. “Now get.”

“Love you,” you said, kissing his cheek, a goofy smile crossing his face. “What?”

“Nothing,” he said. 

“I’ve never kissed you, have I,” you said.

“Well, you’re also not a little girl,” he said. “Speaking of which, go on miss I’m twenty seven before I change my mind and send the kids back with you.”

“Alright, alright. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Colin,” you said, sitting with him on the first step in your parents pool the next day with your feet in the water. It was a little chilly but Colin loved the water and you knew a few minutes wouldn’t hurt. “I know the water is exciting but must you splash everywhere, baby?”

“Unh?” he said, hitting his hands against the water again.

“You take after your father alright,” you said, scooping him up. “You’re due for a nap anyways.”

“I’ll take the babe,” said Jared when you heard him behind you. You spun around and gave him a smile, handing off Colin.

“Just rinse off his feet quick if you don’t mind. He’ll get a bath later,” you said.

“Yes mam’,” he said, Allie running over from the swing set and giving him a hug. “Alright, how about both you guys get in a nap and then we can play?”

Allie nodded and Jared picked her up, carrying them back into the house when you spotted Cody head over.

“Sup,” you said, Cody taking a seat on the step with you.

“Hey,” he said.

“How’s it going?” you asked.

“Good,” he said.

“Good.”

“How’re the kids?”

“Good. Still little monsters,” you said.

“Hey, you been with these guys like ten years right?” he asked.

“Just over that. Yeah,” you said. “Why?”

“Just curious,” he said, resting his elbows on his knees, glancing across the yard to see your dad and TJ wrestling a bit in the grass. “Isn’t TJ like, afraid he’ll hurt him?”

“My dad might be fifty but he’s probably tougher than you,” you said with a laugh. “You can go play with the boys if you want.”

“Nah, I’m fine here,” he said, wiggling his toes in the water. “That’s colder than I was expecting.”

“You excited for Christmas? It’s only a few weeks away,” you said. “You got to tell me what you want too.”

“I don’t need anything,” he said. You cocked your head and he sighed. “A gift card is fine, really.”

“Alright,” you said, leaning back against your palms. “How’s work?”

“Good. Mostly low level stuff lately,” he said.

“Do you ever get scared?” you asked, Cody turning his head back. “I’d get scared. I’ll literally call my dad to kill the spiders in my house if TJ’s not around.”

“No. It’s not being scared. Just being aware of your surroundings. They train you really good on that stuff. This whole family situation is a million times scarier to me,” he said.

“I know. It’s like taking some beat up broken thing off the floor that’s you and handing it over to someone and asking them not to hurt it anymore,” you said. 

“I’m not even at the point where I’ve handed it over,” he said.

“It took me a long to admit to myself that I loved my family. It took me probably ten months before I ever told any of them I loved them and I lived here back then,” you said.

“When did you know?” he asked. “That you loved them?”

“When I felt the first bit of it or when I knew it was unconditional?”

“Both?” he asked.

“Well the first bit was my first day. It was this tiny, tiny little thing that I barely felt for more than a second but my dad, see I told him not to bothering caring about me and that I would never trust him, never believe him that they wanted me as part of their family. He told me he’d prove me wrong. That was the first flicker of something that was built on until...you know stuff happened with me right? With my foster care cases and everything?” you asked.

“It was on the news. I remember our case worker coming and talking to all of us kids about it and about reporting anything bad,” said Cody.

“I remember that day. I remember doubting them for a second, that they had called and asked I be removed. I felt so awful for thinking that. But for a split second, I thought this guy, Jensen, I thought this guy that had spent the past six or so months telling me he loved me, taking care of me, building up this trust...I thought he didn’t want me anymore. It was my worst nightmare. My mom, De, she’s always been a little easier. I don’t know if it’s cause we’re girls or if because I didn’t have the same level of problems with old foster moms as I did dads but Jensen...I was a bratty little bitch to him so many times. So many times. I didn’t deserve to be forgiven for all of it. But he never once made me feel afraid or scared. He protected me. He still protects me. I’ve been here just over ten years now and sometimes I still feel like a kid that wants her dad to fix whatever’s wrong. He does. It’s not bruises or intimidating boys but stuff like late night talks, staying over when TJ’s out of town, that kind of stuff.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying it’s okay to be scared. You’re gonna be scared for a while probably. It took a long time to love my family unconditionally. Longer than it took them. It’s part of the deal. You’ll slip up and have doubts. It may happen years later even. Don’t be too hard on yourself when you do it is all,” you said.

“So when did you know it was unconditional?” he asked. “Them, I mean.”

“Day I asked to be adopted. But it’s funny. That was the day I knew but every day before that I knew too. I didn’t want to admit it to myself was all,” you said. “Defense mechanism.”

“I got a lot of those,” he said quietly. “I don’t know how to trust them.”

“There’s no magic answer, Cody. I didn’t know how to trust my parents either. Or TJ at first. But you’re learning. Think of our first day and now,” you said. “It’s a lot of stumbling baby steps.”

“What are you two munchkins talking about?” you heard your dad say, suddenly ruffling the top of your head, Cody getting one of his own.

“Stuff. TJ kick your ass, old man?” you smirked as you titled your head back.

“That boy should take the self-defense class you took,” he said, nodding to the right. You turned your head and burst out laughing.

“It’s not funny!” said TJ, rolling around on the ground, one of his hands tied to his ankle with his sweatshirt string, his hood pulled down so only his nose was sticking out. “Jensen! I hear you laughing, asshole!”

“Better go save your damsel in distress,” laughed your dad.

“I hate you!” he shouted.

“No you don’t,” said your dad as you pulled your feet out of the water, Cody following suit. “Maybe Cody could teach you a thing or two. I bet he knows a few moves.”

“Or maybe next time Cody can join in and…” said TJ when you walked over to push his hood back and he shook out his head. “I know the two of us could take you.”

“Oh, yes. Two fit boys in their twenties versus the fifty year old because that’s a fair fight. Jared and I against you two though, we win every time,” said your dad.

“Boys. You guys never grow up, do you,” you said, helping TJ for a moment before he popped up. 

“Two out of three,” he said.

“Oh, I’m ready if you are, kid,” said your dad.

“Jensen!” your mom shouted from the porch. “What are you doing to your son-in-law?”

“Nothing,” he said, quickly putting his hands behind his back and putting on an innocent smile.

“Well if you four are done playing in the grass, come in and wash up. Lunch is ready soon,” she said. You hung back with Cody, TJ trying to give your dad a noogie but failing and winding up with one himself, the two chuckling as they headed inside.

“Your dad is kinda...something else,” he said as you took the long way around the house.

“TJ’s dad isn’t the greatest. He’s not a bad guy but TJ and him don’t have the relationship my dad and him do. TJ’s dad is more of a boys don’t have feelings kind of guy,” you said.

“I know the type,” said Cody.

“My dad and TJ got pretty close after we got engaged. TJ’s his kid too,” you said with a small smile. “It’s like how Jared and Gen and the kids are my family even if they’re not. This is what our family is.”

“Does it ever go away? That feeling?” he asked. “Not belonging?”

“Yes. Eventually. The doubt will creep back in sometimes. But these people will smother you with love when that happens,” you said. “But if these guys aren’t the right fit, then maybe we can help you find whatever you think that fit is. I’ll help you.”

“I like them. I have to work more on that trusting them thing though,” he said.

“It’ll happen. Trust me.”

Christmas Night

“Oh, there’s my adorable children,” whispered your dad. You had your head resting on TJ’s shoulder, Arrow passed out on TJ’s other side and curled into him. JJ and Zeppelin were sharing the other end of the couch, the both of them fast asleep. 

He had his phone out most likely and you figured he’d already snapped a few pictures. 

“Precious babies,” he said. You peeled open an eye and saw him walking away. You smiled as you sat up, your dad walking back down to the kitchen.

You heard him sigh as he sat down on the couch and you paused on the stair, just out of view.

“I told you those five were conked out up there,” said your mom.

“They’re so cute,” he said. “I love them.”

“You okay?” she asked.

“I miss when they were little,” he said. “How excited they were to open presents. It’s nice to see Allie and Colin do it but it’s different now. They’re all getting so big.”

“We knew this would happen someday,” she said. “What’s up? I know it’s more than that. You got that worried about Y/N look.”

“She’s a mom. All day her focus was on the kids which I totally get but…” he said, voice cracking slightly. “Sorry.”

“Hey, baby. It’s okay. You’re tired. It’s okay to get emotional,” she said.

“She never got her childhood. It ended when she was ten years old. Every year she gets older and it’s harder,” he said.

“Jensen. Honey, what’s wrong?” she asked. “This isn’t like you.”

“I’m sorry. I just...we were talking at dinner and I realized, she never got her trip,” he said. “The kids trip, the one on one where they pick where to go and it’s just us, when they were little. I realized it took ten years to get a tattoo for her. I didn’t-”

“You have been waiting ten years to get that tattoo because you were trying to find the perfect thing. You’ve wanted to get one for her since she was adopted,” she said. “We have given her so much, Jay. She knows it. She doesn’t care when you got a tattoo. The fact you got one made her so happy. She doesn’t care about a trip. You know she already thinks we do too much for her.”

“Still,” he said. “She’s oldest. She got her school and house and wedding because of that. The other three will get the same exact thing. Her literal life plan, her’s and TJ’s, got thrown out because they walked down an alley.”

“What was our life plan? Two? You remember that?” she asked.

“You got the three you wanted,” he chuckled. “By luck.”

“Yes but a teenager wasn’t in the plan. Not until you, mister I was okay with one kid, out of the blue said you’d really like to add another,” she said. “Plans change. They change all the time. I mean, maybe they started having kids a little sooner than they were planning but can you blame them? Her daddy wanted to adopt. So did they.”

“I’ve never been her daddy, De. She had one of those,” said Jensen.

“I had two of those,” you said, swinging around the corner, leaning against the entrance to the room. Both their heads turned towards you and you shrugged. “I thought I told you I had two dads, just like I had two moms. Also, relax. Mom’s right. You give me more than I ever could have wanted.”

“Still eavesdropping I see,” he said, giving you a smile.

“I would have loved to have gotten to be a little kid around here but I didn’t. Don’t get upset over that dad. I still have a lot of growing up to do. I promise,” you said.

“I know. I was having a moment is all,” he said, closing his eyes. “Go on back to bed, tall munchkin.”

“Okay,” you said, giving him a smile. You stepped over to the couch and gave your mom a hug, giving him one too before you wandered over to his stocking and flicked your finger against it, a light thwacking sound coming from inside. “I wonder what that could be…”

“That was empty earlier,” he said as he stood up. You shrugged and leaned back against the doorframe, smirking as he pulled out the card and opened it. He smiled and dropped his head down. “You two are such little shits.”

“I learned it from you,” you said, giggling when he pulled you into a headlock.

“Your kid vacation,” he said.

“Mom and I thought you might like it. We wanted to surprise you,” you said.

“I am surprised,” he said, glancing over the card. “So we’re going hiking and camping I see. I thought you hated camping?”

“It’s alright,” you said. 

“You two going to be able to survive for a week out in the woods?” she asked.

“Mhm,” you said. “It’ll be fun.”

“You know, the other guys have done things like Disney or...actually they all picked Disney,” he chuckled.

“We can do something else if-”

“No. No. I uh, I think we can have fun. I’ll figure out some fun stuff for us to do. I promise.”

One Week Later

“Do you think it’s gonna rain all day?” you asked, not two hours into your camping trip when it’d started to pour down. Thankfully the two of you were able to put up the tent quickly and get inside without getting too wet.

“I hope not,” he said. You pursed your lips and fixed your sweatshirt around yourself, your dad tucking you into his side. “Cold?”

“A little,” you said.

“When there’s a break in the weather, how about we head back to the car? I got the feeling you don’t really want to go camping all that much,” he said. You risked a glance his way and he smiled. “Just because I like to go on occasion does not mean that we have to spend your trip doing it.”

“I wanted to do something we both would...like,” you said, tucking your knees into your chest.

“Can you be selfish for once in your life? Like, that’s literally the purpose of the kid’s vacation,” he said.

“I thought it was to spend time with you,” you said quietly. He put his arm around you and you put your head on his shoulder.

“Where do you really want to go? Anywhere in the world, you pick,” he said.

“Can we go to the vacation house?” you asked. “Pretend it’s camping?”

“Without a doubt. I got a great idea for once we get there too.”

“Alright,” he said, spread out on one side of the tent that was set up in the family room that night, the flap up and open so you could see the fireplace going. “Never have I ever...seen a boyband in concert.”

“That is cheating and you know it,” you said.

“I think someone is being a sore loser and needs to take a drink,” he said with a chuckle. You smirked and took a sip of your beer, fixing TJ’s henley you wore. “Hit me with it. None of these softball questions either. What happens on kid’s trip, stays on kid’s trip. Shoot.”

“Never have I ever abused my status as a celebrity to get what I want,” you said.

“Okay. Now we’re getting into it,” he said, taking a sip as he laughed. “Also, that’s a pretty broad brush to stroke.”

“Yeah but you totally have gotten special treatment before,” you said.

“I know. I know. Alright. Never have I ever made out in the back of a car,” he said.

“No way,” you scoffed. “You so have.”

“I have not.”

“Yes you have! Dad, come on,” you said. He shrugged and you stared at him, taking a sip. He smirked and took one of his own. “Oh, you gonna play that game?”

“Your mother is hot. Can you blame me?” he asked.

“Ew, dad. That’s mom. I know she’s pretty but like the time I caught you guys making out on the couch was bad enough,” you said.

“Be grateful you aren’t Zepp. Poor boy was scarred for life a few months ago,” he said, sipping on his beer.

“No. Like full on…”

“Mhm.”

“No way.”

“Yes way. Thankfully it was just me and not mom. He was surprisingly grown up about it. That’s kinda when we had our little talk about birds and the bees,” he said.

“Poor traumatized soul,” you said, chuckling as you leaned back against your pillow. 

“He’ll survive,” he laughed. “But yeah, mom and I make out cause you know, it’s fun. It gets a little harder with kids but make sure to keep the romance alive. Go on dates, be silly and make out with each other. You don’t have to stop acting like teenagers in love just because you have kids around.”

“We don’t. TJ’s...he’s not as shy as you might peg him for in certain areas,” you said.

“Well you drank. Obviously you’ve made out with him in a car too.”

“TJ...and Brad.”

“Who the fuck is Brad?” he asked.

“My one and only other boyfriend. Remember?” you asked.

“Oh,” he said. “Yeah. The nice one, right?”

“Mhm.”

“How old were you when you were making out in the back of cars?” he asked.

“Fifteen,” you said. 

“I’ll probably regret going any further down this line of questioning, won’t I.”

“I can guarantee it,” you said. He winced and you frowned. “Mom knows about me and boys, dad.”

“Did you love him?” he asked.

“I liked him but no, I don’t think I loved him. He was refreshing though. He never cared about the foster care stuff. Brad was a good guy. TJ, that was different.”

“He was head over heels in love with you from the start,” he said, resting his feet up on the pillow near your head. 

“When did you love him?” you asked as you sat up. He smiled and glanced down, taking a long drink.

“I had always enjoyed your friendship. I know friends are hard. TJ just seemed to slide right into your life though without a problem which De and I were always a little grateful for. When he started to come over, it was pretty obvious to everyone but you two that you’d at least wind up dating. As time went on, it got a little more obvious and a little more obvious and a little more obvious where things were going. I always liked Thomas. But the moment I knew I loved him was when we talked about him marrying you. That’s a conversation between he and I but it made me realize this boy loved you as much as I do. You deserve a lifetime of that kind of love and I know he’ll give it to you. After that night, yeah, I knew I loved him too,” he said.

“He’s always so understanding if I get quiet sometimes,” you said. “If I have bad days.”

“Partners make the bad days not so bad,” he said with a smile. 

“I started going back to therapy more often,” you said, biting your bottom lip. “Once a week now.”

“Everything okay?” he asked, sitting closer.

“I had some post partum with Colin,” you said, looking at the fire. “Nothing bad. Just stirs up a lot of old stuff. I’ve been talking a lot with Cody too and trying to give the it gets better speech but some days…”

“Some days what?” he asked. You glanced towards him, his shirt sleeve ridden up and showing your tattoo on his bicep.

“Some days I still feel like I ruin everyone’s lives,” you said. “I always cause problems. There’s always drama. I always need help. I feel like a child that doesn’t deserve any of it.”

“Honey, none of that is true. Family is meant to help you,” he said, taking your hand and resting it on his arm. “Can I tell you a secret?”

You nodded and he smiled, pressing your thumb over his tattoo.

“I’m surprised you still have secrets to tell me at this point,” you said.

“Well...I don’t know if it’s really a secret or what. Despite working on a show called Supernatural for years, you know I’m not much of one for ghosts or strange stuff or whatever,” he said.

“Uh, where are you going with this?” you asked. He smiled and shook his head.

“We met when you walked in the front door a little over ten years ago, right?” he asked. You nodded and he laughed. “That’s what I thought too up until recently. We’re both wrong about that.”

“What?”

“Do you recall going to Disneyworld when you were three years old?” he asked. You shook your head. “I would have been about your age actually.”

“Dad, what are you saying.”

“I went on vacation with my parents and siblings to Florida that year. We were waiting at our gate to go home. It was a pretty busy part of the airport. Big terminal, you know, a flight with a couple hundred people easy on it. My mom was filming us on her camera cause you know how moms are. My parents were recently looking through old videos looking for something for Josh and they watched this vacation one in the airport. Apparently I was coming back from the bathroom and you see me heading back and then all of a sudden there’s this little girl standing in the middle of the walkway. She’s crying quietly and she’s got this scrape on her knee. I see her and she sees me and then I go over and kneel down. I’d completely forgotten this ever happened. My mom comes over too and this girl is crying and tells us she’s lost and someone bumped into her and pushed her down and that she’s not supposed to talk to strangers. I tell her I’m Jensen and ask what her name is so we aren’t strangers anymore and-”

“I remember you,” you said, staring at him. “I don’t but I remember freckles and green eyes and Jay. I remember Jay. I couldn’t say Jensen.”

“No, you couldn’t. I picked you up and we found your parents not thirty seconds later and they were so relieved. Your dad tried to pay me but they just ended up thanking my mom and me a lot. Your parents said I was a good kid,” he said. “You told them I was your new friend and then we went our separate ways.”

“I remember you,” you smiled to yourself.

“I don’t believe in stuff like that, munchkin. I don’t. It’s pure coincidence if you ask me. It was less than sixty seconds of our lives,” he said. “But you’ve never once ruined my life. You made it better. You made it better that day. I did something good. I was able to help someone. You swung back around years later and started to help me too.”

“How have I ever helped you?” you asked. He tilted his head and smiled, letting it get bigger the longer you raised an eyebrow.

“I still have things to teach you it seems,” he said, moving your hand over his heart. “This. You have made me a better person. A kinder person. A more patient and loving and understanding person. You made my heart bigger.”

“Dad, that’s-”

“Yes, it’s horribly corny. But it’s true. How many nights have we sat up and gotten through nightmares together?”

“A lot,” you said quietly.

“How many times was I overprotective?”

“A lot.”

“How many times have we been through shit and we get through it?”

“A lot,” you breathed out.

“I love you. I love you more now than even back then. This has never been one way, Y/N. You gave all of us something too, something we could have never asked for. You made all of us better people. We never deserved you, not the other way around.”

You paused for a moment before you crawled into his lap and gave him a big hug, his arms wrapping you up tight.

“Maybe it wasn’t coincidence,” you said against his shoulder.

“Maybe not, kiddo,” he said, kissing your temple, the two of you quiet for a moment. “Why didn’t you tell us about the post partum?”

“It wasn’t that bad,” you said, turning your head away. “I was embarrassed.”

“What would Jared say about that?”

“I know. I wanted to be normal,” you said.

“Normal people are overrated,” he said. You smiled and closed your eyes. “Been awhile since we had a proper cuddle.”

You took a deep breath and shuddered, his hand running up and down your back.

“I should probably save the letter for later, hm?”

“Oh my God, dad,” you said, giggling against him. “You gotta stop with these letters.”

“Really?”

“No,” you said.

“Whew. You only have a ton left. None tonight though,” he smirked. He turned you around and scooted the two of you out of the tent, grabbing a long pole and sticking a marshmallow on the end before handing it to you. “I can get behind this kind of camping trip.”

“Dad,” you said as he put on his own.

“Yeah?”

“Can we go fishing tomorrow?” you asked.

“Oh, I must be in your good graces,” he chuckled. “Of course, kiddo. I’ll even let you put on your own worm.”

“We’re home!” said your dad a few days later as you walked in the house. You turned around the corner, TJ sitting up on a couch with a face mask on, your mom on the other. “I see a staycation was had as well.”

“It was easier to let TJ and the babes stay over,” said your mom. “How’d it go?”

“We really roughed it,” said your dad.

“Yeah, it was-”

“I totally got an alert that the vacation house alarm was turned off so how long you two gonna keep up the charade?” she asked with a smirk.

“You’re no fun,” you said.

“Yes,” said your dad, giving you a high five. “Finally you see my ways.”

“Oh, shut it you two,” she said. “We made brownies earlier if you want some.”

“Are you guys watching Titanic?” you asked, taking a seat next to TJ before you wrapped him up in a cuddle.

“Yes, dear,” he said, tilting his head back as you kissed him. “Have fun?”

“Yeah. It was nice to get away and just relax with dad,” you said. “I told him about…”

“TJ spilled the beans on the whole baby blues situation, honey,” said your mom. “Seriously, talk to us next time. Don’t go through something like that alone.”

“I know,” you said. “I’m okay. So you guys hang out this week?”

“Yeah. We had a good time,” said TJ as he peeled off his mask.

“Extra pretty boy,” you smiled.

“Don’t make us vomit,” said your dad. You stuck out your tongue at him, your mom taking off her own and tossing it in the trash can in the middle of the room full of snacks. “You two been having a movie binge fest or what?”

“Mhm,” said TJ.

“You can tell him,” she said. You looked down at TJ and then to your dad as he slid in behind your mom. “TJ and the kids came over for dinner on Friday and I got a little scared when I realized all the kids were at sleepovers and I’d be home alone. So I made up an excuse to have them stay and he saw through that pretty quickly.”

“It’s really no problem. I know Y/N doesn’t like staying home alone either,” said TJ. You saw your dad smile, glancing down for a moment before he saw you staring. You swore he loved him a little more in that moment.

“Well TJ might suck at wrestling but he’ll take care of you guys if I’m ever not around. I know he will,” he said. They both shared a look and nodded and you wondered if they’d ever spoken about something like that.

“So how was it?” asked TJ quietly when your parents got up to change into some pajamas. “I had a lot of fun hanging out with your mom actually.”

“I’m glad. Dad and I...I really love him. Mom too,” you said, kissing the top of his head.

“There was a little bit of news with Cody actually,” he said.

“Oh yeah? What happened?”

“He had a scary call at work apparently. He wasn’t in good shape when he got home from it all. He called Jared and Gen and they went and got him and brought him to their place. They had a big breakthrough apparently. Cody says he’s starting to get what you meant about the trusting thing,” he said.

“It sucks but sometimes...whenever I fell apart and my parents were there to put me together, when you were there, that’s how I started to learn to trust them. Not having to put yourself together again is nice,” you said.

“I love you,” he said.

“I love you.”

“Well thanks guys,” said your dad, ruffling both your heads as he returned. “I love you guys too.”

“Jensen. Kinda having a moment with my girl, dude,” said TJ.

“I’m your father-in-law. I’m gonna tease the shit out of you, dude,” he chuckled, pinching TJ’s cheek.

“Oh my God,” groaned TJ.

“Thank you, Thomas,” he said, fixing TJ’s hair.

“For what?” he asked as your mom walked back in.

“You know what,” he said, plopping down on the couch, your mom curling up next to him. “Oh, hey. You guys want to watch an old home movie?”

“Dad,” you said with a smirk, getting one back.

“It’s not that long, you guys will love it, I’m sure. I was telling Y/N all about it on our trip. I ought to show her it,” he said.

“Whatever you want, honey,” said your mom. You dad smiled and after a moment, he got the video up on the TV. It was a little boring at first but it was funny to see your other family members so young, still a little surprising to see how well your dad had aged for nearly twenty something years later. 

“Here comes the best part,” he said.

“If we have to see anymore of your horrifically ugly face, Jensen, I don’t know if I can take it,” said TJ. You giggled, your dad chucking a pillow at him.

“Oh just wait and see, Hanover,” he said. TJ settled back into you before he and your mom both shot up like rockets in their seats, staring at the screen. 

“Is that…” said your mom. Your little three year old self was more upset than you thought you’d be but what surprised you most was how you relaxed for a moment when you looked up at Jensen. You remembered being a pretty shy kid and leery of strangers. But you walked right up to him after that and tugged on his hand, Jensen smiling as he knelt down. 

“You picked them,” said TJ as Jensen’s mom came over and started to talk to you. It was comical to you how you shied behind him a little, your head shaking at yourself. Before you knew it you were up on his hip and he was walking around with you before your parents popped up in the video.

“They look happy,” you said. You felt all three of their gazes on you.

“Y/N, I can turn it off if-”

“No,” you said, smiling as you watched yourself get handed over to your dad. You bit your bottom lip as they thanked him over and over again, Jensen getting shy on camera. 

“Bye, Jay,” you waved at them.

“Bye, munchkin,” he chuckled, your head instantly whipping up from your dad’s shoulder. 

“I not a munchkin!” you said.

“Honey, it’s a nickname,” said your mom. “Excuse her, she’s normally not so forward with strangers.”

“Oh, it’s fine. She’s having a rough day. You stick with your parents for me though, kiddo. Promise?” he said.

“Okay,” you said, putting your head back down. “Later, Jay.”

“Later, little munchkin,” he said, chuckling when you giggled and he started to walk back with his mom. “What?”

“You were very good with her,” said his mom.

“Eh, she’s a scared kid. I’m glad we found her parents quick,” he said.

“You’ll make a good dad someday, sweetheart,” she said.

“Oh my God, mom,” he groaned. 

TJ started to crack up and you laughed, giving him a hug for a moment before you buried your head in the back of his neck.

“You okay?” asked TJ. You heard the video end and nodded, glancing over at your dad. 

“Hell of a coincidence,” you said, giving him a smile.

“I don’t…” said your mom, staring back and forth between the two of you. “I…”

“Maybe TJ’s right and you picked us out a long time ago,” he said.

“Maybe, maybe not. I don’t care if it’s coincidence or not. I wound up exactly where I was supposed to,” you said. 

“I think so too,” he said.

“I’m gonna go put on my pajamas and then we can watch a movie,” you said, getting up and heading for the guest room. You found Allie and Colin tucked away in there and you smiled, giving them each a kiss before you headed back down the hall. You paused when you saw your dad leaning against the wall halfway down, smiling softly as you wandered over. “You left out a few things from when you told me about that video.”

“What can I say? I got to keep you on your toes, tall munchkin,” he said. You rolled your eyes but giggled, glancing down for a minute. “I’m sorry. I didn’t even think about the fact you’d see your parents in that video.”

“Jensen,” you said as you lifted your head up. “I got to see three of my four parents together. Happy. That was incredible to see. You will never be my second father, Jensen. I’ve been your child as long as I’ve been theirs. I miss them. A lot. But don’t feel as though you are second to them. Please. They made me and they raised me until they couldn’t. Then you raised me and you had to teach me some of the things I forgot about family. You’ve always taken care of me. I’m not upset about seeing them in that video, dad. It was perfect.”

“I worry about you sometimes,” he said quietly.

“Really? Never would have guessed.”

He chuckled and shook his head.

“JJ and the twins...we made them. It’s different. But you...sometimes I wonder if we’re good enough. I want you to have the world. I want you to have the family that you deserve and one you love. I-”

“Dad. That is the dumbest thing you have ever said to me. I love this family. I love it to death. You gave me the world. No more of this stuff. We all deserve and love each other, okay?” you asked. “Please?”

“Okay, kiddo,” he said. “I’ll try to remember that.”

“Good,” you said, giving him a hug.

“You don’t go wandering off at airports anymore, hm?” he teased.

“Dork,” you said. You peeled back and grabbed his hand. “Movie with the other dorks?”

“Sure,” he said, pulling you along with him. “Come on, little munchkin.”

“It’s tall munchkin to you,” you said. You smirked and headed down the hall, surprised to see the twins and JJ in the living room, all of them rewatching the video with big eyes. 

“Well if we got the whole crew, let’s head up to the TV room where there’s more room,” said your dad. You watched them pile up, JJ hanging back a second while your dad went to make some popcorn in the kitchen.

“Y/N,” she said. You tilted your head, watching her fist her hands together and a shudder leave her. 

“JJ,” you said, giving her a hug. “What’s wrong?”

You saw your dad’s head whip up in the kitchen but you waved him off for the moment.

“I’m so sorry I said we didn’t want you,” she said, wiping off her face. “Before that first Christmas. You’re supposed to be here and I was a brat and-”

“JJ,” you said, giving her a squeezing hug she melted into. “I don’t care about technically anymore. You’re my little sister and I love you. I have always loved you. I was so scared when I was your age. You were five. I’ve never been mad at you for that night. I promise.”

“I remember that night,” said your dad as he walked over. “Your sister almost ran away on us. But she stayed. You know why?”

“No,” she said, your dad brushing thumb over her cheek and cleaning off her face. “Dad.”

“Dad’s cool with you crying in front of him. Trust me,” you said. “I stayed because I wanted to. I knew you were upset was all because you didn’t think I loved you. But I do. I loved you and the other guys long before mom and dad. You guys were easy.”

“Come here you two,” he said, pulling you both into a hug. “No need to dig up that stuff. JJ, Y/N loves you. Believe me.”

“I know,” she said. “I just…”

“Just what, sweetie?” he asked.

“I can’t imagine being by myself right now. I’m as old as Y/N was when she came here. I know I’m not a little kid anymore but I can’t imagine having no one,” she said, turning to you. “How did you do it?”

“I was very unhappy most of the time. Until mom and dad and you guys taught me how to be happy again,” you said. “I’m okay now.”

“JJ. If anything were to happen to me and mom, you’ll never end up in a situation like your sister was. You three will go with her and TJ. They’ll take care of you,” he said.

“Don’t talk like that dad,” she said. “You’re not old.”

“He kinda is,” you smiled.

“Mhm,” he said, putting you both in headlocks.

“Mom!” you both said, your dad chuckling.

“Fend for yourselves!” you heard shouted back.

“Dad’s super ticklish,” you said, getting under his arm before he squirmed.

“Am not!” he said, JJ moving out of the way before she grabbed his arm and turned it over.

“I thought the other one was for Y/N?” she said. You cocked your head and glanced at your dad. 

“Other one? You have another tattoo for me?” you asked.

“It was temporary while I was figuring out which one to do,” he said.

“I’ve used those before. They only last like a week,” you said, your dad blinking slowly at you. 

“You have a tattoo young lady?” he asked. “Where?”

“I’m thinking about it,” you said. “Such a worrier. Come on JJ. Maybe when you’re eighteen we can go get one together.”

“I hate you both,” he said, shaking his head as the popcorn went off.

“We love you too, dad,” you laughed, going over to the stairs with her. She went up first and you glanced back, watching him pour the bag into a few bowls. “Dad.”

“Mhm?”

“Would you really be pissed if I got a tattoo?”

“No. I can’t let the sixteen year old think that though,” he said. “You really want to get one, let me know. Mom and I know a good place to go.”

“I will,” you said, taking a bowl from him.

“Can we watch a movie with dad in it?” asked Zeppelin as you walked up and took a seat.

“Fine, fine. You twins are old enough to see the scary stuff I suppose,” he said.

“What’s the one you and mom were both in?” he asked as you choked on a piece of popcorn, TJ slapping your back.

“No, Zepp, not that one. Maybe My Bloody Valentine if you think they can handle that?” you said. TJ was quick to put it on, your parents chuckling from the far end of the couch.

“Is it scary?” asked Arrow as she wrapped her blanket around herself.

“It’s only a little scary,” said TJ. She climbed into his side between him and Zeppelin.

“Alright, but if it’s too scary I’m gonna leave,” she said.

“You’ll be fine, Ro. It’s all make believe,” said TJ. You excused yourself to the bathroom a little while later, stopping in the family room for a moment when your dad was refilling the bowls.

“You okay?” he asked.

“We should invite the Pads over,” you said. “Family sleepover.”

“Call Jared and the gang,” he said. “They’re always welcome. We can watch Friday the 13th after, make it a night.”

You picked up the house phone and called the Pads house, the phone ringing a few times.

“Padalecki’s,” said Cody.

“Hey Cody, it’s Y/N. How’re you doing?” 

“Hey. I’m good. I’ve been staying over Jared and Gen’s house this week, trying to make a point of it to see them everyday. It’s...helping. I might bunk here for a while,” he said.

“I heard you had a rough night,” you said.

“Yeah. I called Jared after a while and he and Gen came and got me. It wasn’t pretty,” he said.

“Next rough night, don’t hesitate to talk to them. They’ll be there,” you said.

“I know. What’s up?” he asked. “Need Jared?”

“No, I was...we’re having a bit of an impromptu family sleepover in the family room. Movies, popcorn, that sort of thing. We wanted to invite you guys over,” you said. Cody was quiet on the other end. “Cody, still there?”

“Yeah. I’m here,” he said. “I’ve never been to a sleepover actually. I was always the loner kid at school. You know how it is.”

“Yeah, I do. Well get your ass and all those guys over here. We’ll have some fun,” you said.

“We’ll be over soon, Y/N,” he said.

“Cody? You ever want to hang out with just me and TJ, that’s cool too. Just shoot us a text,” you said.

“I’ll take you up on that sometime,” he said softly.

“How’s it feeling lately? That belonging feeling,” you said.

“A little better everyday. I’ve never had parents. I’m still getting used to it,” he said.

“You will. We’ll see you guys soon,” you said. You hung up and put the phone back, your dad grabbing some drinks to bring up. “They’ll be over in a little bit.”

“Okay,” he said as you took a few bottles of water in your arms. “I’m proud of you.”

“For what?” you asked.

“No particular reason,” he said. “Just am.”

“Well I’m proud of you too,” you said, starting to walk away. “I like the charity.”

“You do, huh.”

“Yeah. It gives people a chance. Everyone deserves one of those,” you said.

“You know those test cases I was telling you about? There’s been an adoption so far with everyone of them. I have a feeling Cody’s going to end up being okay too,” he said.

“He needed some love was all,” you said.

“Yeah, he did,” he said. “A friend who’s been through it all doesn’t hurt either.”

“I told him it’s the hardest thing he’ll ever do,” you said.

“Did it ever get easier?” he asked.

“Yeah. Yeah, it did.”

“When?” he asked.

“Everyday. At some point it went from I don’t know if I can trust you to I know he’d die protecting me. I don’t know when it happened but at some point, I knew it was okay. The letters never hurt either,” you said.

“Jared wrote Cody a letter,” he said. You smiled, your dad nodding. “When he’s ready for it. Don’t spoil the surprise though.”

“I won’t. He’ll love it,” you said.

“You know they wanted to adopt because of you,” he said. “You did that. Cody someday. Five other people that were test cases. You helped all those people find families.”

“I didn’t do that, you did,” you said.

“I just put some money into it. You showed me where there was a flaw, a flaw you were so scared of happening to you. I don’t want people to be scared. Kids shouldn’t be scared. It won’t always work out but it gives them a chance,” he said. “You did that.”

“Hey. Hallmark channel,” said Arrow, both your heads whipping over to the stairs. “You two coming back or what?”

“The sass on that child,” you said.

“I’m so proud of my baby girl,” he said, putting a hand on his heart. 

“Maybe if you helped bring up some snacks, the faster we’d get back,” you said.

“Fine,” she groaned, taking some bottles up in her arms. Your dad headed up ahead of you and you followed after, the movie back on after a few minutes. You saw the headlights from the Padaleckis car swing through the windows and you smiled, resting your head on TJ’s shoulder.

“I love you,” he said, kissing your cheek.

“I love you too, babe. Always.”

__________

A/N: Check out the Father’s Day timestamp here!

[bangtan-madi]

All Of Our Lifetimes — One: Daymare

Pairing — Taehyung x Reader

Tags — boyfriend!Taehyung, husband!Taehyung reincarnation au, lovers to strangers and to lovers again, established relationship, implied soulmate au

Genre — fluff, angst, crime (ish)

Word Count — 2.7k

Summary — Does love ever truly end, or does it simply take another form in a new life? The cycle is like clockwork: your lives end and you’re reborn again. You’ve lived it over and over. Each cycle, one of you loses your memories and is tragically unaware until the other finds and awakens their lover. After all these eons, all these lifetimes, is it possible to find each other again—even when neither of you awakens with your memories? 

Part — 1 / 10

Warnings — swearing

A/N — This is going up a few hours earlier than I said previously, but I don’t care! Tuesday is the worst day of the week so I need to put out something good lol. Enjoy!

Previous — Next

"Find me... Find me... F—"

"—Oh, fuck me!"

Milo's temper tantrum draws you from your intense daydream. Jolting in your seat, breath ragged and heartbeat racing, you see your roommate throw a copy of her resume across the living room in a burst of rage.

"Fuck you," she points sharply at the paper, "fuck this, and fuck me!"

As Milo throws herself onto the couch, draping her forearm dramatically across her eyes, she heaves a heavy sigh and groans loudly.

"How are we supposed to have this much experience for an entry-level job, [Y/n]? We were lied to. I feel wronged. Can I sue?"

You shake your head, trying to push the daymare away from your mind. It's not the first time this has happened, and it certainly won't be the last, but somehow that man's face keeps coming back to you. Day and night, he's all you see when you close your eyes, almost like a memory...

You feign a smile as you reply, "Who are you gonna sue, Mi? You're the one that insisted on doing your resume yourself, after our internships."

Milo gestures extravagantly with her free hand, making shapes in the air with her fingers. "Oh, I don't know. Maybe the professor who told us that we'd have enough to get a job overseas by the time we graduated? Maybe the damned school who never mentioned the fact that South Korean's are so damn particular? Maybe my mom who never forced me to continue speaking Korean or writing Hangul when I was a kid so that I had to basically re-learn every-fucking-thing?"

The highs and lows of her complaints cause a laugh to slip out as you turn your attention back to your own resume, a digital copy ready for edits on your laptop. "You're gonna sue your Mrs. Choi? Doesn't sound like a great idea. Besides, I like her too much. Her kimchi is to die for. And if you had already known Korean and Hangul, we may have never met!"

Your best friend nods once, accepting this fact as true. "Probably not. That semester in a foreign language really did solidify our nerdiness about South Korea." She jabs a finger in your direction. "But I have a one-up on you 'cause my grandparents were first-gen immigrants from Seoul. So ha!"

Raising your hands in mock defeat, you retort, "You win that one. I'm just an American."

"So sad." The brunette sits up with an excited expression, eyes wide as she crawls over to you on your side of the sofa. "How about my academic advisor, if you can even call the woman an advisor for rehashing my own questions back at me? She convinced me that I could get a job anywhere, with any degree. So what did I go with? Interior design! I can't find a single freakin' job in Seoul for that! Not that doesn't require, like, three years experience, a particular certification that I conveniently did not get, and a signed contract with the Evil Underlord Satan."

"I really don't think that's gonna work, but hey go ahead and try!"

Milo shoves your shoulder playfully, turning to the television to change it to the New Year's Rockin' Eve show that you'd been waiting to start. "You're the one that took ethics classes! I thought you'd be able to tell me if I had a case."

You scoff, "I took business ethics, not legal ethics! But I can agree with you partly. That woman was of no help. At all. Glad I wasn't stuck with her as an advisor since I was in the communications program."

"Yeah, I like to compare her to our house: a conventional ranch with no personality."

You burst into laughter, and Milo hops up from the sofa, an amused expression on her face. She tosses the remote in your direction. "Get the channel right. I can't find it. I wanna watch the ABC exclusive. Pretty sure we get that through YouTube TV."

You catch the remote with ease and turn to the menu. "You think I know how this thing works? I only use Netflix and Crunchy Roll."

"Just shut up and search, will ya?"

You roll your eyes and do as your roommate asks. "Why ABC? Isn't it easier to just stream it online?"

"Becauuuse BTS! They're gonna be performing in, like, ten minutes!"

"What's that again?" you tease.

"Okay, I am not dealing with you right now. Don't make me come over there and hit you with the champagne bottle."

The last two words catch your attention. You turn around, rest your arms on the back of the sofa, and give your best friend the biggest puppy-dog eyes you can manage. "Pour me a glass, Jagiya?"

Milo smirks at the Korean pet name and grabs the golden bottle from the refrigerator. "Get your ass over here so we can pop it and move on. I ain't waiting for midnight. We got shit to do before then, and I can't work on this job-seeking stuff for another damn second without some alcohol in me."

You squeal a tiny, "Yay!" before leaping over the back of the sofa and joining your roommate in the kitchen.

After the champagne is popped and poured, both of you return to your places on the sofa. You take a sip from your glass as Milo calls your favorite local pizza place to place an order.

"Pickup in fifteen, which is perfect! I don't wanna miss BTS," she giggles, pushing her champagne away. "No drinking and driving. I can wait until I get back."

"You're giving up champagne for this band?" you tut, swirling your glass to show off the drink. "You must really love these boys."

Milo narrows her dark eyes at you and tosses her hair over her shoulder. "You'll see."

Another sip and you turn back to your laptop, the noise of the New Year's Rockin' Eve in the background. "Mhm, sure."

You continue to work in relative quiet for the next five minutes until Milo breaks the peace with an elated screech, a sound that is more similar to that of an animal than a twenty-something woman.

"They're on!" She grabs your arm and shakes it vigorously. "Look at them!"

You stop your edits to your portfolio and turn to the television with a sigh. The crowd has started to go mad over the seven men currently trotting up the stairs and on to the stage. The singing has already begun, and you have to admit that their voices harmonized spectacularly together.

But there's one voice, in particular, that is so familiar to you. Despite being mixed in with the group, the lowest register has your eyes leaving your laptop screen and shifting to the television. You can't put your finger on it, but there's something so soft, so real, so warm about it.

The camera zeroes in on the seven men. All are dressed to the nines and look like they're having a blast while performing. So not only can they sing and dance—and, for some, rap—they're all stupid good looking, each in their own unique way.

As the first song comes to a close, and Milo sings the last verse at the top of her lungs, the camera pans to the man in the center. He delivers some of the last lines in a voice as soft and warm as the one you'd heard amongst the mass. Except, this time, he stands out.

But you recognize more than his voice; his appearance is familiar, too. Despite remaining in the background for most of the first song's performance, there's something about the man with the wavy black hair and similarly colored trench coat that calls to you. On an ordinary day, on any other day, you would wave it off as a simple attraction.

But this—this is different. You can't put your finger on how or why, but you know that you've met this person before.

Lightning strikes. You know where you've seen this face before. He's been in your dreams and nightmares, your daymares and daytime imagination. He's been all over your mind, consuming it for the past few months. You've always had this dream, ever since you were a child, but lately, those nightmares have been getting more frequent. This man might be a slightly younger version than the one that plagues your dreams, but it's the same person. You're sure of it. Every time you close your eyes, his face is the one you see.

Right before you both die.

The next song begins, and the dark-haired stranger is back at the front. For the remainder of their eight-minute time slot, your eyes are glued to the screen, unable to comprehend where this person came from. You have distinct memories of your mother consoling a three-year-old you after having these same night terrors. Surely, you could not have seen this person back then. It's unlikely you saw him at all, and certainly not as he is at the turn of the decade.

"Who's that?"

Milo follows your gesture, seeing the raven-haired man taking center stage once again. "That's Kim Taehyung! Pretty, isn't he?" She chuckles at your expression. "You have a bias already, damn that's impressive. I mean, I'm more of a Hoseok girl myself but..."

Your roommate's chatter fades away as your attention is once again drawn to the screen. The performance ends, and the show shifts to a different artist, all part of the New Year's Rockin' Eve circus.

"Welp, that was worth the wait, but  I'm gonna go pick up that pizza," Milo cheers, hopping to her feet. "Don't drink all the champagne before I get back!" 

You shake your head and wave to the brunette as she slips out the door. Turning back to your laptop, you open a new search bar and put in two words: Kim Taehyung.

Millions of results pop up, everything from Wikipedia articles to Koreaboo gossip posts and everything in between. The entire time Milo is gone, you spend online researching BTS' V. By the end of the half-hour, you've learned quite a bit about him—taking particular note that his birthday is just a few days after yours—and have stalked his social media.

A little farther down on the results, you see an ad for Big Hit Entertainment. The ad says that the company is looking for bi-lingual speakers, preferably English and Korean, to hire as a production assistant. Out of curiosity, you click on the link and are taken to Big Hit's site.

Milo returns with fanfare, holding the pizza in front of her like Simba the lion. "It's the cirrrcle of life!" she sings. "They were definitely talking about pizza when they wrote that line."

As she plops the box onto the kitchen counter, you make a sound of vague agreement. Milo asks you how many pieces you want, but you hardly hear her, eyes skimming the job posting over and over.

Is this a possibility? Is this something you're actually considering? Besides the fact that you just saw the add a few minutes ago, your reasons for applying are vague at best. Are you weighing the real options, or are you leaning into this particular job because it might lead you to answers? Or maybe give you an opportunity to meet this Kim Taehyung, maybe even ask him questions?

"Hello? Earth to [Y/n]!" Milo reaches over the back of the sofa to wave a hand in front of your face. Snapping you out of your stupor, your best friend laughs. "Damn, what are you reading? You're really out—wait...is that Big Hit? You found a job posting? What!"

Milo grabs your laptop and pulls it from your grasp. "Mi—"

She brings it over the back of the couch, placing it on the counter beside the pizza. Her brown eyes are wide and curious as she scrolls through the information. "Production assistant for Big Hit, in Seoul, for a bi-lingual speaker with no prior experience? Dude. This is the perfect job! Like, seriously, where did you find this?"

"On Google," you sigh, knowing that you're not going to get the laptop back until Milo relinquishes her control. You settle in on the stool beside her. "I was looking...for postings while you were gone. I stumbled across it."

Milo cocks an eyebrow and shows you your search history, terms which mostly consist of "BTS," "BTS V," and "Kim Taehyung."

"Mhm, suuure, we'll go with job postings."

You take the device from her with a playful scowl. "My point remains. This is exactly what I've been looking for. It says here that the job would be a lot of translation work, both in person and on documents. I'd also assist in the studio while recording or producing. And various other tasks, but I think it'd put my communications major to good use. It's a step in the right direction."

"You sure you just don't wanna see Taehyung-ssi?" she giggles.

A rising feeling of defensiveness comes over you as you close your laptop, moving to the sofa to retrieve your glass of champagne. "I just heard BTS for the first time tonight, Milo. I'm not about to pick my first post-college job and move half-way around the world for a boy I don't even know, let alone a K-pop boy."

"A cute K-pop boy, though." 

You return to her side, raising both eyebrows in an expression that says, "Really?"

Milo shrugs, raising her hands in mock surrender. "Okay, okay, I'll let it go. Just an odd choice for you."

"Well, it's like we were saying earlier." You grab a piece of pizza from the box and shove the end into your mouth. "What'd we got t'lose?"

Milo makes a "close your mouth" gesture with her hand, grimacing at the sight. "Points were made. Fine, but maybe sleep on it? And this is me telling you to not be impulsive," she laughs towards the end. "But what the hell. If you go for it, I might have to find a job in Seoul sooner than I thought."

"I'm sure there are thousands of applicants," you grimace, the reality of the situation settling in. 

Milo grabs a slice for herself and wraps an arm around your shoulders. "And you're worth each and every one of 'em." After pressing a loud kiss to your temple, she slips from the bench and plops back down on the sofa. "C'mon! We got some balls to drop and resumes to edit."

Later that evening, or earlier the next morning, you're left cleaning up as Milo reclines on the sofa in a tipsy slumber. After the New Year rolls in, along with a brand new decade, you're left alone with your thoughts. 

Thoughts and several disposable dishes.

As you tidy up, you contemplate the options in front of you. Sure, you'd sent out several resumes to plenty of companies already. Some of which you'd heard absolutely nothing from, while others have let you know they'll get back to you about a possible interview. So far, nothing has been terribly promising.

So what' the harm in applying for the Big Hit job in Seoul?

The other half of your motivation slips into your sleepy mind. The person you've seen since childhood, could he really be Taehyung? Could you finally be so close to the answers? Why only one dream? Why him? Why so much blood and death?

Does he dream of you, too?

The laptop remains on the kitchen counter, and your fingers itch to open it up and send off your completed resume. This could lead to more than just a new job and a fresh start; this could lead to the answers you've been seeking ever since you were three years old.

A tiny voice inside you says, "Do it."

And, against your better judgment, you listen. 

[proofthatihaveaheart]

fic rec list of 2019

Rules: Post links (Ao3, ff.net, etc.); specify fandom/pairing/etc; don’t answer the same fic twice - spread the appreciation; tag other people; you don’t have to answer all the questions, but leave them in the list so the next person can answer if they want.

I saw this going around and thought it might be fun to do so here we go.. This year I read an assorted mix of fandoms so we’ve got a lot of variation in here including The Adventure Zone, Brooklyn Nine Nine, Coco, Dishonored, Good Omens, Life is Strange, Lucifer, Marvel, Steven Universe, Tangled, and The Umbrella Academy. 

-

1. Favourite complete fic you’ve read this month (multiple chapters/parts): strings by pathygen (Tangled, Cassandra-centric, s3 canon divergent) which was a beautiful and fascinating exploration of how anger can twist a person into someone else. It’s dark and it builds to one of my favorite moments in any fic I read this year. 

2. Favourite complete fic you’ve read this month (one-shot): dance, dance (we’re falling apart to half-time) by gleesquid (Marvel, Gwen/MJ), I always want more GwenMJ fics and this one delivered on that, with bonus dancing and other Spidey characters showing up. 

3. Favourite WIP you’ve read this month: tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow by fishycorvid (The Adventure Zone, Taako-centric). Technically Sy finished it this month but shhhhh it counts, it absolutely counts. This fic is painful, about grief and living on after, about how sometimes things don’t work even when you try hard to make them better. It hurts and it’s beautifully done.  

4. One fic/series you’ve read which you keep coming back to again and again: A lot of fics could fit for this category but I chose Waltz of the Nian by QuickYoke (Steven Universe, Lapis character study with some Lapis/Peridot) because there were several lines that just stuck with me. Whenever I think of the character I think of those lines now. More generally, this is a fantastic character study about trauma and intimacy. 

5. Most underrated fic you’ve read this year: Such a Cunning Disguise by WhenasInSilks (Marvel 616, Carol/Jessica, Secret Invasion AU). Mind the warnings on this fic, it earns them. A beautiful work that deserves more kudos but I imagine the warnings + Carol/Jess being generally underrated keeps people away.  

6. Most underrated fic you’ve read EVER: nothing immediately came to mind and i was too lazy to dig through all my old fic bookmarks so i’m skipping it

7. Favourite whump/angst fic of the year: I got it down to two and then I couldn’t choose which one to rec so you get two recs for the price of one! Both are Marvel. another place, another time by sorrybaby (MCU, Carol/Maria, Carol/Val) because sometimes you love someone but you don’t end up together, very painful, very well-written.  the small rain down can rain by tigrrmilk (Marvel 616, Carol/Jess) which hurts in a different way and isn’t quite as painful but is also very good character work dealing with Jessica’s feelings on Carol’s sacrifice and amnesia. 

8. Favourite hurt/comfort fic of the year: I did not expect to read Life is Strange fic this year but then we got that photo of them in LiS2 and my heart swelled with feelings. I’m fortunate to have landed on this fic to read -  migratory animals by swapcats (Life is Strange, Max/Chloe) is an excellent road trip post-game fic where the healing and comfort goes both ways. It’s the perfect epilogue to their adventure. 

9. Favourite fluff fic of the year: I knew I was going to rec Carol/Maria for this category but it took me time to decide which fic and then I remembered this one existed - jambalaya (please be my baby) by carol_danvers (MCU, Carol/Maria). It’s one of my favorite getting-together fics for them and it’s full of fluffy moments. 

10. Favourite smut fic of the year: nope

11. Favourite gen fic of the year: Try Again by pprfaith (The Umbrella Academy, multi-POV) which is absolutely the type of TUA fic I wanted after finishing the show. There’s lots of hurt/comfort, lots of good sibling dynamics, lots of confronting trauma and healing from it. It’s good. 

12. Favourite fix-it fic of the year/ever: It’s not so much that I think the ending of CM needed fixing in any way, it worked really well and that final shot of Carol looking down on her home before blasting off is superb, but also I really wanted to read fics where she stayed with her family. Also fics that made their relationship romantic. This was my favorite of that type -  Lightning Crash by Monochrome_girl (MCU, Carol/Maria).

13. Favourite crack-fic fic of the year: I didn’t read any

14. Favourite sick-fic this year: I don’t think I read any this year... but I did read fics where people patched injuries up so I’m reccing brave face talk so lightly by lesbiyawn (MCU, Carol/Maria) 

15. Favourite kid-fic this year: With the exception of Captain Marvel fics which featured Monica, I didn’t read any kid-fic and it would be a stretch to call those fics kid-fic because they were more fics that just happened to feature a kid as a character? But then this is also a stretch, it’s pregnancy fic but also is it? and anyway I enjoyed it so it deserves a rec -  oh violets, you did so signify by fruitwhirl (Brooklyn Nine Nine, Jake/Amy)

15. Fic this year which you didn’t expect to love as much as you do: Jasper/Lapis is not a ship I considered reading but I love everything anistar_e writes so I figured why not read her SU fic? And I did and I was blown away by this one in particular - Favor for Your Four-Chambered Heart by anistar_e (Steven Universe, Jasper/Lapis, Never Let Me Go AU) which balances themes of freedom, self-determination, and power in a world where your only purpose is to die for others beautifully. People make mistakes but they’re allowed to grow and become better. I just really love this fic with all my heart.  

16. Fic which convinced you to ship a pairing: in oakland by hupsoonheng (MCU, Erik/Sam) which set Erik/Sam before me, a pairing I had never considered, and wove a story about two hurting teenage boys finding love over the course of a summer. It’s beautifully done. 

17. Favourite AU you’ve read this year: It was between this and the SU Never Let Me Go AU and since that one fit a different category, I decided to put this one here. Choose Your Faces Wisely by Poetry (Good Omens, Aziraphale/Crowley). It’s a Daemon AU with some really neat concepts about the daemons of supernatural beings and some really good character stuff, which are some of my favorite things in daemon fic.  

18. Longest fic/series you’ve read this year:  I read many long fics this year but Work of All Saints by anistar_e (Coco, Imelda-centric with Ernesto/Hector/Imelda, 210k) was by far the longest. And what a masterpiece it was! It’s basically a novel with the amount of world-building and character development it does, a grand epic that is incredibly personal in its scope. Spectacular! 

19. The last fic you’ve read: I got back into playing Dishonored 2 over the break and as a result, I decided to read some fic for it. This one popped up on multiple rec lists and I can see why. tetralogy of fallot by patho (Dishonored, Emily-centric) is short, 10 sections of 100 words each, and still manages to craft a haunting narrative about High Chaos Emily’s reign. 

20. Wildcard fic you haven’t mentioned but deserves a shout-out + why: I was stuck between two fics I really wanted to mention and so I decided to rec both (the more recs, the merrier!): 

And There Was Light by ariaadagio (Lucifer, Lucifer/Chloe, 143k) which branches off from the end of season 2 and spins a long tale of existential angst, love, and navigating human-divine relations.  

Salinity (And Other Measurements of Brackish Water) by drawlight (Good Omens, Aziraphale/Crowley) which is a shorter fic that reads like poetry. 

Tagging @startofamoment, @thinbottomedcauldron, @dmigod, @thornscrowned, and anyone else who wants to do it! 

[comicgeekscomicgeek]

Their Hero Academia: Chapter 20

My on-going, next-gen, My Hero Academia fan fic!  This time featuring Kimiko Ojiro! Chapters 0-19 (plus the interlude) can be found here

Their Hero Academia – Chapter 20: Kimiko Ojiro Stands Out

Kimiko was pretty sure the boredom was going to kill her.  Of course, she’d said that about the rest of the morning’s classes, but Hero Art History was probably going to nuke her brain the most.  It was not nearly as interesting as the name made it sound, being more about the art of heroing throughout history. Which was boring!

At least their teacher was hot.  Skyline was tall and blonde, with muscles that showed clearly through his sleeveless blue and white bodysuit.  The big white cape was probably a bit much though.  About half the time, he was nearly tripping over it or getting it caught on something. ��For an American, his Japanese was surprisingly good.  Or maybe not so surprising, considering his father, Captain Celebrity, had relocated from America to Japan ages ago.

Even now, the boredom was seeping in, as Skyline was explaining about how, many years ago, an American Pro-Hero had nearly derailed a passenger training while fighting a Villain, which had resulted in a lawsuit that had ultimately led to more lawsuits which had led to America and several other countries (but not Japan) deciding to revoke all Pro-Hero licenses for nearly twenty years.  Boring!  Who cared about something that had happened that long ago, before any of them were even born?  Besides, Quirks were a lot less common in those days.  These days, nearly ninety percent of the population had them. They’d never do anything like that again!

One of the nice things about being invisible?  So long as she wasn’t, like, completely slumped over asleep, no one could tell if she wasn’t actually paying attention.  Well, her dad could.  But he could do the same for Mom too.  He’d had plenty of practice with invisible people.

“All right, who can tell me the name of the law that led to the re-registration of Pro-Heroes in those countries that had outlawed them?” Skyline asked.  

The hands in the front row all went up: Asuka Tokoyami, Toshi Midoriya, Shota Shinso, and Izumi Todoroki.  Skyline’s eyes scanned the room.  “Ojiro?”

Crap!  She had no idea what the answer to the question was. She’d zoned out during that part of the lecture.  “It’s, ah, um…  I don’t know, Mister Skyline.”

“Perhaps someone—someone not in the front row—could help Miss Ojiro?  No, not you, Mineta, you’ve got too much American in your background not to know this already.”

Skyline’s eyes looked over the other students again and Kimiko could tell he was making a concentrated effort to look around her, not through her, to look at the students in the back row.  Not everybody did.  She was used to it.

“Haimawari?” Skyline said. “What was the name of the act?”

“Ah, the official name was the International Hero Accord.  But a lot of people called it the Deavor-Parr Act, after the lobbyist and Pro-Heroes who were the reason it passed in the first place,” Haimawari said.  

“Good,” Skyline said. “Not many people know the other name and it’s not in your textbook.  How’d you know it?”

“My dad’s a major Hero fanboy,” Haimawari said.  “I kind of am too, I guess.”

Skyline grinned.  “That does explain your essay from last week. I was pretty sure Midoriya or Shinso had written it, until I double-checked the name.”  A soft laughter rippled through most of the class.

Just what they needed. Another nerd!  Midoriya and Shinso were too much sometimes as it was.  

Their teacher shot a look at the clock.  “Okay, almost lunchtime, so I’ll shut up for now.  Homework for tomorrow is Chapter 12 in your textbooks and one page on the repercussions of the Leopardon Act of ’78.”

Kimiko barely stopped herself from letting out a groan.

***

“Okay, Kimiko, we’re recording,” Takuma Sero (one of her total BFF’s, even if he utterly failed at being a gay best friend.  The thought of some of the things he considered fashionable made her shudder) said, holding up his phone.  “And three… two… one!”

The two of them and Kenta Sato had finished their lunches and, being barred from filming more “Will Sato Eat It?” in the cafeteria, they’d had to adjust their filming scheduling and gone with one of the projects that starred her instead.  

The irony of a video series starring someone who couldn’t be seen was not lost on her.  But she came from a long line of invisible people. Her mom was, both of her mom’s parents were, and so were several other relatives of the Hagakure side, though some were more visible than others.  She actually had a cousin who was just slightly transparent.

And sure, maybe she didn’t really know what she looked like.  But she knew who she was.  And she had plenty of friends and family that saw her anyway.  

“Hello, everyone!” she said, grinning and looking into the camera, giving it an exaggerated wave.  “Can you tell I’m smiling?  Because I’m totally smiling!  I’m Kimiko Ojiro and this is Gossip Corner!  Bringing you all the juiciest gossip straight from the student body of U.A!”

She held up her own phone, showing Takuma’s social media page and one of the selfies he had taken on his date with Tensei Iida.  “Okay, so this one is old news, but it bears repeating!  My best friend and total pink cutie pie had himself a date with this pink-haired hunk of jet-fueled hotness!  And they’re going on another one!  Let’s all wish them well and hope we get lots more pictures come beach season! Hashtag—Pinkysquared!

“But wait… there’s more!” She turned and pointed behind her, the sleeve of her uniform mostly showing the way.  Takuma followed with his phone, zooming in on the table across the room where Midoriya sat with Tokoyami, Todoroki, Haimawari, Shinso, and Sora Iida.  Iida was sitting as close to Midoriya as humanly possible, pressed right up against him.  Midoriya himself looked a little flustered, but ultimately happy.

“Yes, that’s right, it’s a two for one Iida Special!  It looks like Sora Iida is now dating Toshi Midoriya!  This one flew right under everyone’s radar… even mine! That’s right, viewers, I literally did not find this out until Monday afternoon!”

Takuma brought the phone back around to focus on her.  “How did this happen? Will they stay together?  Will she accidentally kill him testing some new gadget?  Will someone have to explain the birds and bees to them in an incredibly awkward conversation?”  She shrugged.  “That’s what makes this so great!  We! Don’t!  Know!  But I promise you all, as soon as I find anything out, you’ll all be the first to know! Hashtag—Iidagreen!”

“And just so you don’t think I’m just focusing on Class 1-A… I have it on good authority that David Togata, of Support Class 1-G…”   She snapped her fingers and pointed to a spot across the room. Takuma followed again and focused in on a tall, skinny boy with a mane of wild blonde hair, glasses, and extra-long, multi-jointed fingers, sat with others from the Support Department and also Tensei Iida.  

“…Has broken up with his Junior High girlfriend!  That’s right, ladies, he’s on the market!  Get him while you can and remember to be direct!  You know these Support Department types don’t always pick up on subtle flirting!  Hashtag—SingleScientist!”

Takuma returned the phone to filming her again.  “That’s all for today!  But remember my promise to you, viewers!  If it’s worth knowing, I’ll make sure you know it!  I’m Kimiko Ojiro and this has been Gossip Corner!  Remember to hit like and subscribe!”

Cutting the video, Takuma gave her a thumbs’ up.  “Great job, Kimiko,” he said.  “I’ll add some stuff in post and get it uploaded tonight.”

“That wasn’t a nice thing to do to David,” Kenta said, crossing his arms.  “You don’t know if he even wants another girlfriend that fast.” Sure, he was happy to go along with whatever Takuma came up with, but apparently now he had standards?

She shrugged.  “You worry too much, Kenta!  I’m just putting it out there in the wild.  I can’t be responsible for what happens after that! He’ll probably thank me for getting him out of those dirty workshops! Don’t be such a wet blanket.”

Besides, if you wanted to get noticed and you were invisible, you either went big or went home.

“She’s got a point, Kenta,” Takuma said.  “And it’s good for hits.  Besides, it’s a big school.  Dave’ll probably never notice.”

“Just for that,” Kenta said, holding up a paper bag, “I’m not sharing these donuts Dad made me.”

Horror swept over her face, but Kenta and Takuma just looked at her.  “…I’m making my horrified face, right now!  If you don’t share, I’ll… I’ll…”  She waved her arms wildly.  “I’ll never forgive you!”

Kenta just laughed. “Relax,” he said.  “I’ll share.  I’ll share.  I’ve got enough for all three of us.”

There was no way she was missing a chance at Kenta’s dad’s treats, and they were as good as promised.

“You know, Kimiko,” Takuma said, “one thing I’ve always wondered… how do you find your mouth?”

She rolled her eyes. Not that he could see it.  So she put a little extra irritation into her voice. “How do you find your mouth, Takuma?”

“I dunno. I just do.”

“Same thing for me,” she said.  “I’ve just got better proprioception than most people.  Mom and my grandparents do too.”

“Proprio-what?” Kenta asked.

“It means I’ve got a really good sense of where my limbs and body parts are,” she said.

“Oh,” he said.  “Learn something new every day.”

***

Back at the USJ, Kimiko was working with Daisuke Shoji, Tokoyami, Haimawari, Tensei Iida, and Katsumi Kirishima-Bakugo.  Having already worked with All Might and Water Spout, they were now working with Doc Clock.  So far, the results had been somewhat mixed.   While Tokoyami’s Frog-Shadow and Daisuke’s strength and Extendo-Limbs were ideal for rescue operations, and the mobility offered by Haimawari and Iida’s Quirks at least offered them good options for extraction, neither her Quirk not Kirishima-Bakugo’s was exactly good at clearing the rubble or getting into tight places to rescue someone.

Or at least, that’s what she’d thought going into this week.  She was used to using her Quirk for hiding things or hiding herself (thank goodness she didn’t have to go into the field naked like Mom did!), or even occasionally disoriented a robot or security camera.  But on Monday, All Might had suggested that she could use it to render rubble or walls invisible, letting her and everyone else see beyond them for easy visualization of rescues or finding buried people.

That had been a revelation in and of itself.  She had some memories of using her Quirk to try and look inside Christmas presents, but all she’d managed to do then was make the entire package and everything in it invisible.  But with a little coaching, she’d found she could do layers.

What Doc Clock was now suggesting was even more surprising.

“You’re like a portable x-ray machine,” Doc Clock told her on one side of one of the rescue animatronics.  She’d already put the others to work and was watching them through a small monitor, in-between offering Kimiko some instruction.  Somewhere inside the simulated city, she was sure she could hear Kirishima-Bakugo cursing about how stupid the whole thing was and how she hadn’t gotten to blow anything up in three days.

“No radiation, minimal danger of potential interactions with other Quirks, though if they’ve been really badly injured or burned, you may have trouble finding a safe point of contact,” Doc Clock went on.  “But you could do a lot for field triage, maybe a more if you went for a Hero-Paramedic’s license. A first responder who can do an in-depth assessment and more than basic first aid?  You’d be remarkable.”

Remarkable? Maybe.  She’d pretty much given herself to mostly being an Underground Hero. With her stealth and the martial arts training she’d gotten from her dad, she knew she could be formidable when the situation called for it.  But even that was at odds with the media personality she wanted to cultivate along with Takuma and Kenta.  This was something that had never occurred to her…

“Okay,” she said, “so walk me through this.”

Doc Clock nodded, looking down at the dummy.  “So the animatronics aren’t a perfect simulation, but they have enough inner workings that we can give it a shot.  If this works out and you want to keep going with it, we can find some live people for you to work on.  If nothing else, I’m sure Dad can “persuade” some of your classmates into volunteering.”

While Doc Clock—Eri—had been the unofficial Class 1-A mascot and thus was familiar to all of them, Kimiko still found it almost impossible to believe that the laid-back, cheerful doctor was their dour Homeroom teacher’s adopted daughter.  

“But what you’re going to do,” she went on, “is concentrate on just using your Quirk to make a small portion of their chest invisible.  Just enough so we can see through the top layer and see what’s inside. Give it a shot.  You can’t break it.”

Kimiko sucked in a breath and placed a hand on the dummy’s chest, concentrating on her Quirk. Just a little bit invisible…  just a little bit invisible…

Slowly and spreading out from her palm, the dummy’s chest began to look like it was just fading away, revealing a most of mechanical workings inside.  “I did it!”  She threw up both hands in the air in a cheer.  Of course, the second she broke contact, the invisibility went away.

Doc Clock gave her a smile.  “You did. We were all pretty sure you could, but to see it…  very impressive, Ojiro.”

“Wait,” Kimiko said, as things clicked in her head.  “…If I do that on a real person, will I see all their guts and stuff?”

“I’m afraid so,” Doc Clock said.  

Kimiko shuddered.  She hadn’t considered that.  “Eeeeewwww!”

“Most people have lots of stuff,” Doc Clock said. “And with some Quirks, we’re discovering new Quirks all the time.  You’d have to do a lot of studying to stay current.”

“Double ew!” Kimiko exclaimed.  Still… “But you think I’d be good at it?”

“You’ve got a good eye and an invaluable Quirk.  I think you’d be great at it.”

***

Kimiko fought the urge to fall asleep.  After the day’s session at the USJ, she’d actually taken up Doc Clock’s offer of some more literature to review for Quirk-Paramedics as well as some general medical texts.  While some of it was fascinating, some of it was as dusty and dry as could be.  It wasn’t something she’d ever thought of before and the thought of all those guts made her more than a little sick to her stomach… but it sounded like she might be able to do a lot more good than just sneaking up on people and smacking them upside the head.

“Hey, Kimiko!” she heard her door open and turned to see Takuma and Kenta barging their way in.

Kimiko was neither as girly as her mom, nor as plain as her dad, but her room was definitely her own.  Her bookshelves were filled with “tell all” scandalous autobiographies and saucy romance novels, and posters from romance movies and other “chick flicks” covered most of her walls.  She also did have a small sparring dummy in one corner, for when she felt like working out a little.

If Takuma had been able to see her, he would have been dead from the withering gaze she gave him.  “I told you to knock!  What if I’d been changing or naked or something!”

Takuma reared back his head and laughed.  “One, if you’re doing that, you should lock your door.  Two, I’m gay.  And three…”

Kenta put a hand on his shoulder as a warning.  “I would not finish that thought, bro. You know she can kick your ass.”

She held her gaze on him until he withered under it, even unable to see it.  “Okay, okay,” he said.  “I should have knocked.”

“Good,” she said.  “Now what’s up?”

“Gossip Corner’s only been uploaded an hour and it’s already got nearly a thousand hits!  You’re gonna be a star, Kimmy, baby!”

She let out a high pitched squeal of delight.  “All right!”

“I still think this is a bad idea,” Kenta said.  “We didn’t ask anybody if we could put them out on the internet like that.”

“Pshaw,” Takuma said.  “They’ll thank us for making them famous.  Besides, they’ll never know.  We all know all Toshi watches is Hero videos anyway.”

“This is gonna bite us in the ass, I just know it,” Kenta said.

“Relax,” Kimiko assured him.  “Besides, this is all on me and Takuma anyway.  You’re not in these.”

“That doesn’t mean I wanna see it explode in your faces!”

“You’re sweet,” she told him.  “But relaaaaaax.”

Still, as long as she had both of them here…

“Guys,” she said, “do you think I’m smart?”

Both of them exchanged a look and seemed to be trying to communicate by some form of guy-telepathy.  Takuma in particular looked like he wanted to get out of her room as fast as he could. Kenta, at least, looked inclined to stay.

“You’re not dumb,” Kenta said, “if that’s what you’re asking.”

“Definitely not,” Takuma agreed.  “And you’re all kinds of clever.  Who came up with the plan that got me a boyfriend?”

“Boyfriend?” Kimiko asked.  “Wait, you’re not distracting me with gossip!  Answer the question.  Do you think I’m smart?  Do you think I could be a doctor?”

“What brought this up, Kimiko?” Kenta asked.

“Just… something Doc Clock said today,” she said.  “She said I could be a great doctor or paramedic.  And that my Quirk would be perfect for it.  I’m kinda thinking about it.  But it sounds like a lot of wrong.  And a lot of studying.  It’s only been a week and a half and I already know I’m barely keeping up in class.  What if I’m perfect for this… and I can’t do it?”

“Then you’ll be good at something else instead,” Takuma said.

“Sounds like a lot of hard work,” Kenta added.  “But you put a lot of hard work into all that gossip stuff too.  If you can quote chapter and verse on film and TV, you can definitely memorize how a body works.”

“You wanna study this stuff, we can help,” Takuma offered.  “I bet there’s hundreds of videos out there to help you study it. Finally, my countless hours on the internet are about to pay off!”

She had to laugh at that.  “Your grades are worse than mine, Takuma.  But I appreciate the help.”

Later, after the boys had left, she scribbled something on top of the notepad on her desk.

The Paramedic Hero: X-Ray?

[howlingmoonrise]

Dear Yuletide Author

thank you for signing up for yuletide, i hope you have fun!

i’ve put all my letters in one place so you don’t have to juggle links around, feel free to send me an anon (is that allowed?) if you’re in doubt as to whether i’d like a certain trope or not! (and so sorry about all the ranting oops)

things i like in general:

pining. TONS of pining. ALL the pining! i have a lot more fun reading about idiots in love that aren’t together yet than if they’re already in an established relationship

i’m good with either gen or romance if you’re not comfortable with shippy stuff! what really works for me is the relationship itself, platonic or not, the development of it, and the interactions/feelings regarding the other. when it comes to the characters i’ve picked, for me it makes sense for them to develop trust and fondness/affection for the other before they get into any sort of relationship so gen is all good!

i’m veeeeeery fond of enemies/rivals-to-friends-to-lovers, and bickering pairs overall (as you can see by all my choices in characters lmfao) since they’re so much fun and provide such an opportunity for character and relationship development :D

continuing from above, nothing kills me as much as characters that bicker all the time but in the end they rely on the other and go to each other before they go to anyone else

conceptual AUs are fine! by this i mean stuff like soulmate AUs, AUs where they met differently from canon, i’m-your-next-door-neighbour-and-i-had-to-break-into-your-flat-to-get-my-cat-back AUs, canon divergence, that kind of thing - AUs like that are super fun!

fun tropes (sorry, these are a bit romance-heavy): fake dating, “accidentally got roped into x thing and shenanigans are happening”, What Do You Mean We’re Not Dating?, “oh no there’s only one bed”, misunderstood confessions, trope subversion in general is also GREAT

i REALLY like the canon and characters for all the fandoms i picked, so sticking at least to their characterisations and the overall “tone” of canon are a huge plus!! “missing scenes” and “what if” canon-divergent situations are excellent but like i said, i also like conceptual AUs so don’t be afraid to mix up the scenario a bit if you enjoy it, because i do too!

things i don’t like a lot in general:

kidfics. unless it’s petshop of horrors - where Chris and the pets are an exception - next gen and stuff are a pass for me

far into the future fics in general, actually - what really does it for me is the development, so if we skip ahead to much later on i feel like we end up missing it all

i usually don’t like most angst stuff since it feels a bit gratuitous to me when it comes to most fandoms and characters. the one exception for this is psoh (see below if you’re picking this fandom) or when it’s introspection fic. as a result of this, i’d pass on most content with major character death, sexual abuse, self-harm, the like, though of course there are always exceptions to the rule and you’re free to write as you wish! 

hard AUs are a bit ehhh to me - by this i mean world-heavy stuff like harry potter AUs, where the focus ends up more on the setting than the characters more often than not. i’d also pass on high school AUs (gsnk being the obvious exception) and ABO. 

i heavily dislike things involving cheating/infidelity, and genderbending is a bit ehhhh for me

script-based or roleplay fic is not really my preferred format, i really enjoy prose instead of nearly all dialogue!

if you’re going for nsfw:

kinks: moderate sadism/masochism, bondage, choking/breathplay, xenophilia and tentacles (which only make sense here for like... 1.5 fandoms lmfao), moderate degradation, edging

squicks: scat, vomit, praise kink, daddy or baby kink, vore, forced feminization, pet play, gore

--

PETSHOP OF HORRORS

i’m usually not partial to angst AT ALL but psoh is the one fandom where i don’t mind it if you wanna go ahead - psoh is RIPE for angst. we got two people with abandonment and inadequacy issues: leon who decided to leave his whole life behind to chase someone who gave him life and left him after thinking that he didn’t care for him at all, and d who is supremely fucked up by his upbringing and had to push leon off the ark to continue his family’s mission and let drop one (1) single tear that he was not supposed to cry over a human.

THAT BEING SAID, i also!!!! love slice of life shit for them!!!!!!!! GODS i love how much they bicker but then they turn around and the other is the person they rely on the most and who they trust above all others and how they keep roping each other into ridiculous shenanigans. neither of them are particularly communicative with a few rare exceptions, so there’s also a lot of room for introspection there on both sides, which i LOVE. my son leon in particular is also super underestimated when it comes to his intelligence and tolerance for gay shit both in canon and fandom, and he performs ridiculous leaps of logic and instinct that somehow turn out to be right but that are super ???? for everyone else involved, and that’s always fun to see. hell, just another missing scene where leon brings d some cake and they banter fondly over tea is A++++ to me!!

nsfw???? bring it!!! this is the fandom amongst these three where you’re free to go super dark and kinky if you wanna, or if you wanna write tender loving reunion sex where d cries a little while leon cherishes every bit of him that’s also excellent! 

psoh is the most excellent genre triangle where i’d be super happy to receive anything on the slice-of-life/angst/smut corners! (also, slash is 3249823% acceptable if you couldn’t tell by my ranting)

--

GEKKAN SHOUJO NOZAKI-KUN

yuzuki seo is my absolute favourite character on the series and i love her and how ridiculous she is! waka is also gr9, and i really love that little sadist streak he has going like when he kept teasing seo with his “confessions”, that was probably one of my favourite chapters! 

for gnsk either canon-verse or a conceptual AU would be excellent - if you’re going AU, i’m very fond of those where seo is a siren/mermaid and possibly man-eating (because those are the best kind amirite??) canon-wise i LOVE their interactions and how waka keeps accidentally getting taken on lowkey dates while resolutely defending they’re not even friends and even more accidentally retributing those with thoughtful gifts and the like haha

another thing i love is when waka is capable of looking past appearances to see seo, like in the chapter where they gave her the “lorelei” makeover and no one recognized her but him. i also love how stupidly happy seo is whenever she sees waka, it’s so cute!!

--

HOWL’S MOVING CASTLE

the thing i like the most in hmc are the characters’ flaws! i love the ghibli movie, don’t get me wrong, but they took away the bits i liked the most - sophie’s stubbornness and nosiness and temper and howl’s cowardice and vanity and his silver-tongue whenever he tries to slither around sophie, and all their banter and arguing. 

there’s nothing quite like their stupid arguments where sophie pretends she didn’t mess around with things she shouldn’t and howl is torn between being amused and exasperated at her expense - even better if he’s trying to do something good sneakily behind her back so he won’t be accused of being a good person before he finds another excuse to justify it. 

for this fandom i’d really prefer it if it were from anywhere from the beginning of the first book to before their marriage (i haven’t read the sequels and prefer non-established relationship anyway), but a conceptual AU would also be pretty nice! hmc in particular is very good for trope subverting, which i’m extremely fond of! for example, take a soulmate AU with the first words written on the skin thing: we could mess it up a bit since calcifer was in possession of howl’s heart and as such his first words would be on sophie instead of howl’s - cue shenanigans while sophie wonders how someone can have a soulmate bond with a sentient fire with no words of his own, howl panics internally about sophie not returning his mark, and so on! 

another thing i love about the book is the writing style and that incredible sense of humour in the writing, so something lighthearted and in the spirit of canon would be great!

[xb-squaredx]

Knack Review: More Like Lack

In 2013, the PS4 hit the store shelves, its library littered with a variety of games that just happened to look slightly nicer than their PS3 counterparts. Amidst the “next-gen” ports, there was ONE game that stood out as being a true step forward. A glimpse into the future of gaming as we knew it, and something that could only be defined by the words “Next-Gen”: Killzone: Shadow Fall. Oh, and Knack was there too. A new IP and at the time one of the only real benchmark games out there for what was defined as “next-gen,” Knack is definitely an interesting title. While nowadays a punchline and meme (due to a certain YouTuber), I finally got a chance to run through the game and see just what all the fuss (or lack thereof) was about.

Knack is a frustrating game for many reasons, most of all that it has a fairly solid premise with some real potential…but the execution is overall lacking. The story of the game is simple enough; long ago, humans and goblins went to war over “Relics,” ancient technology from a long-gone civilization. Humans won, goblins were banished and human civilization flourished. Now, Doctor Vargas has achieved a new breakthrough in Knack, a sentient pile of Relics that can absorb Relics into himself to grow bigger and stronger, and it’s up to Knack to take out the goblin forces whenever they show up. The goal of every level (or Chapter) in the game is simple; get Knack big, so he can smash stuff. And yet the game tries to complicate the premise with the introduction of tons of human characters and their own interpersonal conflicts that either A) fail to endear them to you or B) are barely used.

Doctor Vargas (who is called only “Doctor” so often I quickly forgot his name) is either expositing, going on and on about his dead wife or being told he’s reckless and needs to be held back. Despite this, he’s not really what I’d call reckless throughout the game up until the ONE moment where the script says some conflict should happen. The world-traveling adventurer Flynn comes and goes out of the narrative to the point that he feels useless, and his nephew Lucas has his own personal character arc where he wants to earn Vargas’ trust, while still getting over the death of his parents and it’s given enough focus that you get the feeling he should be the main character. The problem with Knack’s story isn’t just the cliché dialogue and paper-thin characters; Knack is the main hero and thus solves pretty much every problem, which results in the human cast being useless 99% of the time. Knack’s own story rarely intersects with the humans overall; it feels like two stories violently fighting for screen time. The result is that you can come to resent the human characters because they do nothing but order Knack around, and you can’t really be endeared to Knack because he has almost no personality. He rarely talks, does what is asked of him without question or even a snarky reply and whenever he DOES say something it’s either a joke that falls flat or an attempt at sounding cool that is ruined because…just look at the guy. This is clearly not the kind of game you play for the story.

As for gameplay…it’s a mixed bag, really. I often saw Knack billed as a platformer; in some circles it was marketed as this generation’s Crash Bandicoot or Spryo the Dragon. In actuality, Knack is a 3D beat-em-up with minor platforming elements; the actual platforming is very simple, at times even automated. Many times throughout the game, rather than letting players jump down into a new area or cross a gap, the game will take control away from you and go into a brief cutscene where the jump is done for you. I suppose its fine that the platforming isn’t the focus, but if that was the case, I wish they had made Knack’s default jump better at the very least. He has a normal jump and a double jump, and in almost all instances, the single jump can’t clear anything. Every jump essentially requires two jumps to clear, and while that sounds very minor, it gets VERY annoying as time goes on. Mashing that jump button when it should be done in half the button presses makes the platforming feel like a chore when it should be…you know…FUN.

You spend the bulk of your time fighting though, the platforming just a minor break from the repetitive, monotonous combat. Knack’s move set is pretty basic; a three-hit combo and an aerial attack and…that’s pretty much it. He does have three special moves that can be performed if you find enough Sunstone crystals to charge your “batteries” but it often takes so long to build up uses, I almost always regret using them, even if they are generally good for clearing out a whole room of enemies at once. Knack also has a dodge move that feels very inconsistent; sometimes it comes out fast, other times it seems to not register in time to dodge. You can’t dodge in the same direction more than once, and you really don’t move that far out of the way, so in many cases I’d dodge at the correct time but still get hit by an attack. Oh, and did I mention dodging is done by flicking the right stick? It’s about as awkward as it sounds.

So if the right stick controls dodging, how does one control the camera? Well, Knack is kind enough to prevent any camera control at all. It either moves the camera automatically or more often has a fixed camera angle for many rooms. Generally, this was something done in the infancy of 3D games, before proper camera control was really ironed out, a result of necessity really. Seeing these techniques employed in Knack was a bit of a red flag, but admittedly fixed camera angles aren’t inherently bad…but it becomes clear early on that they are not used well in Knack. Enemies can go off-screen leaving you with no way to tell where they are or where to dodge, and since the overall premise of each level is for Knack to get bigger, he will eventually obscure a great deal of the camera in some spots, resulting in me blindly attacking and hoping I hit the enemies that are in front of me. I suppose I should be thankful the platforming isn’t more intensive or else the fixed camera angles could become more of a problem then they already are. The game is far from unplayable due to this, but it’s still far more annoying than it should be.

So with a limited move set, a stiff, at times unresponsive dodge and camera shenanigans aplenty, that’s a lot going against Knack’s combat, and that’s before we even factor in the overall difficulty. Now, difficulty is subjective; one man’s easy is another’s hard, and I don’t really like bringing it up unless it feels necessary. Knack isn’t a brutally hard game that only the hardest of the hardcore can beat, but considering how simple its mechanics are and how it’s marketed as a game meant for the younger set (in lieu of all the complex shooters out there), it feels far harder than it should be on many occasions. Part of this comes from enemies being very smart and often paired together in ways to ensure Knack is always at a disadvantage. Nearly every enemy in the game has superior range to him, either with large melee weapons or with projectile attacks, something Knack has no real answer for. Melee attackers will charge forward while the others hang back to pelt you with shots, and if you ever get close enough to attack, often enemies can roll out of the way of your attacks and then immediately retaliate; something Knack really can’t do due to poor range and attack speed. It’s still manageable though; you learn to bait enemies first rather than go in aggressively, and that’ll work out fine enough…however that doesn’t stop the constant frustration. One big problem I have with Knack that shines the most in combat is the rigid scaling it employs with everything. Knack starts each Chapter at his smallest stage, and he’ll fight enemies of a similar size; tiny goblins or bugs, usually. As he gets bigger, so do his enemies. He graduates from bugs to humans or human-sized robots, then giant goblins and robots, then tanks and attack helicopters and so on. The problems start when you realize that it’s often hard to appreciate how big he’s really getting when everything appropriately scales. It’s rare that he fights smaller enemies in his larger forms, and you NEVER encounter a bigger enemy when small (baring one real instance). The level itself seems to perfectly scale out to be just as wide as it usually is, the enemies can see you eye-to-eye at all times and while the game TRIES to hype you up as being big and powerful, it doesn’t work. This is also due to the fact that, regardless of how big Knack gets, he’ll be fighting enemies that will usually kill him in two hits, MAYBE three if you’re lucky. The attack scaling is so aggressive any sense of empowerment you had is lost instantly. There’s something so WRONG about seeing Knack’s massive health bar instantly halve when an enemy so much as touches him. It feels more appropriate when he’s small; it gives you a reason to get bigger and stop being a pushover, but the game never lets you flex those oversized muscles.

Knack feels like it could be a cross between Katamari Damacy and Hulk Ultimate Destruction. It should feel rewarding to see Knack at his biggest, something you spend the whole chapter accomplishing, but it never really hits that outside of some fleeting moments. A Chapter where you ward off a goblin attack in the middle of a city is one of the few parts of the game where it almost comes together. The townspeople in the distance combined with the buildings all around you establish appropriate scale and it feels like you’re in the middle of a monster movie. I wish more of the game had felt like that. That’s not even touching on the fact that no matter how big Knack gets in a chapter, he’ll ALWAYS shrink at the end, and you know you’ll be starting the next chapter out small and weak. Not exactly a great motivator to keep going. That’s not the only bit of potential being wasted either.

Knack is composed of a bunch of independent objects and that alone means he should be able to reshape himself into almost anything. He could form a shield or sword with excess parts, and really it makes no sense why his dodge barely covers any ground when he could just disperse the Relics that make him up and then quickly reform. The game even shows that he can amass other objects into his body for a time; reflexive crystal, ice, wood and metal, but outside of the crystal, the other forms are shown to be a poor man’s substitute for Relics. Ice Knack melts in the heat, Wood Knack can be lit on fire and burned away and Metal Knack is only usable in areas where powerful magnets either slow you down or strip the metal away. All three of these forms also don’t actually grant you more health and when you get hit, you lose those materials and shrink, allowing you to be instantly taken out by enemies that are technically one “tier” of size above you. Using the crystals though, Knack becomes “Stealth Knack” and the Chapters that make use of the form were actually pretty fun. Unlike the other forms, Stealth Knack is used when he needs to get small, walking through security beams and going into ventilation shafts, but at the press of a button Knack could switch back to a bigger form for combat. I really don’t get why only that form worked that way.

At the end of the day, Knack frustrates more than it excites or entertains. If not due to its restrictive fixed camera angels, dull and at times unfulfilling combat and shoddy excuse for a story, than for the potential that lies within. There’s a good game buried under here, somewhere. From what I hear, Knack 2 fixes a lot of these issues…at least as far as gameplay goes. Going into Knack, I expected it to just be kind of dull and unremarkable, but in the end I had way more to say about it than I thought I would. It’s a concept with a lot of room to grow and really it should have been grown out more before it was released. Knack feels less like a fully fleshed-out idea and more like a tech demo for the PS4 to flex its then-new muscles. Which makes it amusing when anytime I use a special attack the framerate dies. As a launch title for a new system, Knack had the unfortunate responsibility of being seen as an example of what games could do with upgraded technology, what the “next step” in gaming would look like, but it really looks like it might have taken a few steps backward.

Until next time.

-B

[impracticaldemon]

Graylu Week 2017: Fanfiction Warm & Fuzzy

by Impracticaldemon [art credit to @miss-zei ]

Author's Note:

This is Chapter 3 of the story that I wrote for Graylu Fluff Week 2017. I was unable to complete the story then thanks to Real Life(TM) and the need to prioritize my various ongoing writing projects in consequence later in the year.

Thank you to everyone who is willing to pick this up now and read the next chapter, which is actually being written during Graylu Week 2017. While I am either a multi-shipper or somebody who enjoys writing for a lot of ships, Graylu has a special place in my heart because Graylu Week 2016 was the first Fairy Tail ship week I knew about and wrote for.

Happy One Year Fairy Tail Anniversary to me and Thank You to all my readers!

Graylu Week 2017 Prompt: Warm and Fuzzy [from Graylu Fluff Week 2017] @fyeahgrayluweek

The snow had been drifting down for about an hour, but the dancing flakes were slowly becoming heavier and faster, like weekend revellers transforming back into serious, weekday commuters. As dusk closed in, the wind picked up as well, and the temperature began to fall. It would be a cold night.

Gray and Lucy stood in the window embrasure watching the last of the light fade vanish from the sky. Gray had one arm wrapped tightly around Lucy, so that she was standing with her back pressed to his chest; he was feeling more relaxed and just… content… than he had in a long time. Lucy, looking adorable (in Gray's opinion) in soft, pink flannel pajamas covered with white bunnies, seemed happy as well. They both held mugs of steaming hot chocolate topped with tiny dollops of whipped cream—although the cream was quickly dissolving. Gray hadn't realized that he liked hot chocolate, but Lucy had assured him that it didn't have to be sickly sweet, and she'd been right.

Suddenly, Lucy shivered and her shoulders stiffened.

"Lucy? Luce—what's wrong?"

She shook her head, as if to clear it. "Sorry… I don't know what came over me. It felt as though all that snow was, I don't know, about to come piling in on me. Weird, right?" She laughed, but Gray thought it sounded forced.

He hesitated, unsure what to do. On the one hand, he'd heard that some people found the deep snows and encircling mountains made them uneasy. On the other hand, Lucy was a highly trained and perceptive mage. They'd both learned not to take odd situations at face value. Unlike FlameBrain. He takes everything at face value and deals with the consequences later. But as much as Gray loved to poke fun at Natsu, he knew that his best friend and arch rival had an unmatched ability for being happy and cheering up those around him. He envied Natsu in that way.

"Gray?"

Gray shook his head, unsure how he'd gotten distracted by Natsu of all things. "Yeah, sorry… Anyway, it's probably nothing, but in case you're getting bad vibes for a reason, let's finish our drinks in front of the fire instead of in front of the window." He made a point of sipping at his hot chocolate and realized that it had cooled far more quickly than he'd expected. That was okay, though. He glanced at the fire to make sure that it was still burning—it had given him trouble earlier and reminded him that he was getting too used to having people around to use magic for stuff.

"Is it okay if I read for a bit?" Lucy sounded tentative. Gray wished that they were past all this tip-toeing around each other, but he knew that it was just part of the shift in their relationship.

"Yeah, sure. I think I'll do the same." He rolled his eyes at Lucy's expression. "Oh come on, Lucy! Don't give me that 'wow you can read?' look!"

"I didn't!" But Lucy was grinning rather sheepishly. "I just figured that you were more into other things."

"Would it make you happier to know that I also have a brand new, hand-held game lacrima with me?" Gray reluctantly let go of Lucy so that she could get her book, and fished the third gen Crystal System out of a padded inner pocket of his leather jacket.

"No way! You have a 3CS?" Lucy was standing beside him, her book in one hand. "Two screens, bigger memory, and you can text other 3CS systems within range? Um." Lucy saw the look on Gray's face and stopped, blushing.

"Yep. Does it fit my image better than the reading?" Gray was just teasing, but Lucy looked embarrassed, so he kissed her—just to reassure her everything was fine. "Sounds like you're more of a geek than you let on," he murmured against her lips.

He always seemed to forget how great it was… She was warm, and soft, and had amazing curves. After a couple of minutes of being reassuring, Gray added: "Or if you really want to know how stereotypical I can be, we can put these… things… down…" He took the book out of Lucy's hand and used a wisp of ice magic to set it carefully with his game system on the nearest handy surface. With two hands free now, he could do a better job of kissing his girlfriend.

Lucy finally drew back slightly, laughing and flushed. "Your fire is going to waste," she told him impishly.

Gray blinked at her and then smirked, his dark eyes gleaming wickedly. "My fire is doing just fine, thanks. But if you insist"—he picked Lucy up and carried her over to the couch—"then we can get closer to this old thing"—he gestured to the flames dancing along the logs in the fireplace. Without giving himself a chance to second-guess, he trapped Lucy under him and went back to kissing her.

"I see you got your shirt off," the blonde muttered a few, very pleasant minutes later. Her eyes were half closed and her hands were running along Gray's arms and shoulders.

"… Doesn't sound like you're objecting…" Gray was in the process of adding a hickey to one of Lucy's creamy shoulders. He had to concentrate in order to prevent himself from pulling the fuzzy pink pajama top right off Lucy altogether.

"I'm not, I'm admiring."

Time passed, more snow fell, and the fire—the one in the grate—started to burn low from lack of tending. On the couch, Gray dragged himself upright and pulled Lucy into his lap. They were both disheveled and panting heavily.

"So…" Gray said, still running his hands appreciatively along Lucy's soft flannels, which were partially unbuttoned down the front. Neither of them knew exactly how, but the ice mage was down to his navy boxers. "How about we order some food, and fresh hot cocoa, and get our books out?" He gave Lucy a comic-book-villain leer and added: "If you're very good, you can even try out my 'game system'."

Lucy laughed despite herself—more specifically, despite her hormones, which were suggesting something else entirely. There was no secret about what Gray wanted, but he showed no signs of impatience and seemed honestly happier than Lucy had seen him in quite a while.

In a way, it was part of the thrill to know that she was one of the few to get to see the cheerful Gray, instead of the slightly negative, emo guy he'd become over the past several months. When they'd first met, he'd been the one she joked with and commiserated with when they were out on team missions—often over dumb things like how bizarre their enemies were (not to mention their teammates), or how joining a dark guild seemed to promote horrible fashion sense. She'd just started to really miss that side of him when she'd realized that part of his problem was that he'd fallen for her and wasn't sure how to behave. Of course, it was dangerous to mix your job, your friendships, and romance.

"Well too bad!" she said out loud, startling Gray. He recovered fast though.

"You don't want to try out my game system?" he asked slyly.

"I think it might be fun, actually," Lucy responded, batting her eyelashes at him and tracing a finger-tip along his chest. Her deliberately over-the-top manner made him grin, although her touch made his cheeks flush. "Although I suppose you have stuff like 'SuperSmashMage' and 'MakaroKart'," Lucy went on.

"True," he conceded, bending his head to nibble on her ear. "But I also have the most recent 'Legend of Zervis', and I hear that girls think the hero's cute."

"He is rather darkly attractive," Lucy conceded. "But I want to try 'Flame Emblem'—the stories look pretty good."

"Stories, huh? Let's face it, the game's gone from a great tactical simulator and RPG to a, a romance game!"

"Has not!" Lucy batted ineffectively at Gray—it was awkward to hit the person on whom you were sitting. "That is such a dumb complaint. Besides, guys are just as goofy about the pairings as girls are."

"Nope," Gray said firmly, wrinkling his nose and trying not to laugh (or put his hand inside Lucy's top, which was the most attractive option). "We just can't avoid the fact that good 'relationships' provide key attack and defense bonuses."

"And you don't play the Catch-a-Critter game because of the cute Critters, right?"

"Right."

"Aha! You do play it then!"

"... Possibly. But only so that I can have a better fighting team than Natsu."

"And the Critters are cute."

"No."

"Show me who you've got and I'll find the one you've kept just because it's cute."

"I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

Lucy snatched up one of the cushions that had fallen onto the floor earlier and whacked Gray over the head. "Ugh!"

"Sorry, sorry, that was really lame!" Gray threw up his hands to protect his face, and Lucy took advantage of being able to move to shift so that she was sitting across his lap.

Her intention had been to get a better angle of attack, but the result was that Gray's face ended up in her cleavage. She both heard and felt him react to the distinctly provocative situation, and felt herself blush. Not that this was much different from the way they'd been messing around before.

"I'll just go stand out in the snow for a while," Gray muttered against her skin. "Maybe that will help."

"Do you want to build a snowman?" Lucy quipped softly, knowing that Gray had gotten really, really sick of that line lately. Personally, she'd found the movie a lot of fun and rather moving, but Gray had started to react violently when people told him to 'let it go' any time he got irritated. Even Erza hadn't been able to stop the fight that had erupted when Natsu had asked if 'Elsa' was ready to head out on a quest. The unfortunate thing was that Natsu hadn't really been responsible—Gajeel had set him up.

Gray breathed out and hugged Lucy close, arms wrapping tightly around her waist and shoulders. Then he laughed, and Lucy smiled. Slowly but surely they were figuring each other out. The shared humour was still there.

"No, no I don't," he said, answering her question with mock seriousness. "What I want… is something else."

"You know, I thought that snuggling on a couch in my pajamas in front of a fire would just be kind of warm and fuzzy," Lucy told him, sitting back a little so that she could see Gray's face.

"It is," Gray replied immediately. "I'm warm and you're fuzzy." He ran his hands down the back of her soft, pink, bunny-covered top. "Why don't you go get your book and my CS? I figure one of two things will happen eventually: either we'll be attacked by malignant cold spirits—I think there's actually some out there—or I'll beg you to let me take you to bed."

Lucy shivered slightly. Gray could be all too good at putting distance between himself and others. But right now she had the feeling that he was being completely honest. Pink-cheeked, she hopped up and fetched the book and the small gaming lacrima. As she settled in against Gray to read—or try to read—a large snowflake with a little heart in the center fluttered down onto her page.

"You can always, always say no. Remember that, okay?"

"I will," Lucy answered. "But it's hard to turn down a chance to fight malignant cold spirits, you know?"

[END]

A/Note: Thank you for reading and for any reviews or comments, likes or reblogs, kudos etc. depending on your PoP (Platform of Preference). I do plan to write a little more for Graylu Week 2017 (September), so hopefully the stars will align - I'm looking at *you* Lucy!

Tags:  @miss-zei @nalufever @gsut  @eliz1369 @shell-senji @sassyhazelowl @lockandk3yfiction

[ges-sa]

New Post has been published on https://ges-sa.com/new-asus-laptops-bring-some-creative-changes/

New Asus laptops bring some creative changes

We attended an Asus event yesterday to see all the new laptop products that they are releasing. I was pleasantly surprised to see some cool changes in these laptops and will most likely have a great effect in the industry.

Ons of the most notable changes is that of the ScreenPad, this pad replaces the trace/touch pad on the laptop. The ScreenPad is a colour touch screen that acts as your normal touch padand can then be customized to run Apps. For instance, you can at a touch change the screen to a calculator to quickly use and then switch back to the mouse control or while playing your favourite game, have the ScreenPad run your favorite playlist or even watch videos. This is a great innovation and should appeal to a mass market in my opinion.

More details can be seen below with the different laptop and which ones has some great new stuff to offer.

ASUS fashionably debuts new elegant, ultra-thin and light laptops in South Africa

The world’s third-largest laptop manufacturer, ASUS, debuted its new range of consumer laptops for the South African market at a glittering fashion show at Sandton City today.

ASUS South Africa unveiled its new premium ZenBook series – the ZenBook 13, ZenBook 14 and ZenBook 15, ZenBook Pro 14, ZenBook Flip 13 and ZenBook Flip 15 – and two new additions to its VivoBook family: the 14-inch VivoBook 14 and the 15.6-inch VivoBook 15 at a local launch, to follow their debut at global trade show CES in Las Vegas, US, earlier this month.

Top South African designers Neo Serati, inaugural Project Runway SA winner Kentse Masilo and Balini Naidoo showcased designs – inspired by ASUS – at the launch.

“South Africa is an important market for us which is why we wanted to launch our new models at a glittering event, similar to the global launch at CES, “ says Jasmine Lin, Product Manager & Marketing Head at ASUS South Africa.  “And we plumped for a fashion show because ASUS laptops are not just tools, they are lifestyle products that complement and enhance users’ lives.”

Lin adds that the new laptops demonstrated significant development in a field that had not seen a lot of innovation in the past few years.

“Our new models all feature four-sided frameless ultraslim bezels which mean that screen size has increased significantly while the actual devices themselves haven’t. And they feature ASUS’ innovative numeric keypads build into the touchpads which allow for  easy and familiar data entry. We also have innovative fingerprint and face recognition options to make logging in easier and more secure,” she says.

The ZenBook 13, 14 and 15 are part of a fully redesigned series of premium thin and light laptops with stunning new frameless NanoEdge display, which features ultraslim bezels on all four sides and an unrivaled up to 95% screen-to-body ratio[ for a near-borderless viewing experience. The NanoEdge display also allows a much more compact design, with the result that each of the new ZenBook models has the smallest footprint in its class.

The 13-inch and 14-inch models also optionally include the exclusive new NumPad, an innovative productivity enhancement that provides a full-size LED-illuminated numeric keypad built into the touchpad.

All models feature a special 3D IR camera that allows fast face login using Windows Hello, even in low-light environments.

The new models feature a full complement of high-performance components including the latest 8th Generation Intel® Core™ i7 quad-core CPU, up to NVIDIA® GeForce® GTX 1050 Max-Q graphics, 16GB RAM, ultrafast PCIe® SSDs and gigabit-class Wi-Fi.

Designed to be versatile, powerful and supremely portable, the 13.3-inch ZenBook Flip 13 and 15.6-inch ZenBook Flip 15 are 10% smaller than the previous models[ and feature frameless NanoEdge displays with ultra-narrow bezels on all four sides and a 90% screen-to-body ratio that enables a much more compact chassis design.

Both models incorporate a world-facing camera, designed specifically for use with mixed-reality applications that allow users to interact with 3D virtual objects in the physical world.

ZenBook Flip 13 also introduces the amazing new NumPad.

ZenBook Flip 15 and 13 are powered by the latest Intel® Core™ processors, and their touchscreen displays support an active stylus for easy and intuitive creative input. For the ultimate creative power, ZenBook Flip 15 adds high-performance discrete NVIDIA® graphics and a PANTONE® Validated display for accurate color rendering.

ZenBook Pro 14 features the futuristic new ScreenPad — an ASUS innovation that reinvents the way users work and interact with their laptop — and is designed for highly mobile artists, designers, programmers, or any kind of creator who’s excited by new technology

ScreenPad cleverly combines a touchpad with a high-resolution, full-color touchscreen to offer novel ways of interacting intelligently with both Windows apps and dedicated programs called ScreenPad Apps. Adaptive functions with context-sensitive tools enhance workflow and productivity, and ScreenPad is fully customizable to allow users to personalize their experience.

All models are torture-tested to military-grade (MIL-STD-810G) reliability standards, with demanding tests that include environmental extremes of altitude, temperature and humidity, in addition to extensive drop, shock and vibration testing.

They also feature the unique ErgoLift hinge design, which has a silky-smooth, stepless action that holds the display securely at any angle, allowing the laptops to be used in laptop, tablet, stand or tent modes — or anything in between — for the ultimate versatility.

When working on the go, it’s vital to be able to connect with anything and everything. The new ZenBook series features the revolutionary USB Type-C™ (USB-C™) port for any-way-up connections and superfast USB 3.1 Gen 2 (up to 10Gbps[) data transfers, and there’s also a range of other USB ports, including USB Type-A (up to 5Gbps or 10Gbps) and/or USB 2.0. All models also include an HDMI port and a microSD or SD card reader, so it’s easy to connect to all your current and future peripherals.

Meanwhile, the VivoBook 14-inch X412 and 15-inch X512 feature frameless NanoEdge displays with at least an 87% screen-to-body ratio for immersive viewing.

The incredibly slim bezel allows a large display to fit into a smaller chassis, effectively reducing the laptop footprint for a more compact and portable machine.

These laptops are powered by up to an 8th Generation Intel® Core™ i7 processor with up to NVIDIA® GeForce® MX130 discrete graphics, and include the ErgoLift hinge that tilts the keyboard to replicate the feel of a desktop keyboard for a more comfortable typing experience.

VivoBook 14 and 15 are available in four gorgeous colors so users can select one that best express themselves. There are classics such as Transparent Silver and Slate Grey, as well as iridescent Peacock Blue, which changes color tone depending on how light strikes the laptop surface. There’s also the eye-catching Coral Crush, which is slated to be a big hit in 2019. The ZenBook 14 and 15 and Flip 15 are available In February while the ZenBook 13, Pro 14, Flip 13, and VivoBook 14 and 15 are available at selected retailers from March.

ASUS Republic of Gamers launches range of NVIDIA GeForce RTX laptops in South Africa

ASUS Republic of Gamers (ROG) debuted its latest line-up of laptops, which will take gaming to the next level at a glittering fashion show at Sandton City today.

The ROG Zephyrus S GX701, ROG Zephyrus S GX531, ROG Strix Scar II 17, ROG Strix Scar II 15,

TUF Gaming FX705 and the TUF Gaming FX505 are filled with updates that elevate portable PC gaming experience across a diverse family of form factors.

Top South African designers Neo Serati, inaugural Project Runway SA winner Kentse Masilo and Balini Naidoo showcased designs – “Inspired by ASUS” – at the launch. The laptops were first debuted at the global trade show, CES, in Las Vegas three weeks ago.

“South Africa is an important market for us which is why we wanted to launch our new models at a glittering event, similar to the global launch at CES“ – says Jasmine Lin, Product Manager & Marketing Head at ASUS South Africa. 

Lin says the new laptops will bring gaming to the next level: “ROG’s mission has always been producing the most innovative gaming solutions that enable the ultimate experience for gamers.  We’ve noticed that quite a few of gamers need their machines for both gaming and working. The ROG Zephyrus are designed for both scenarios”.

Zephyrus S GX701

Ultraslim gaming laptop that takes hardcore gaming to the next level with the new NVIDIA® GeForce RTX™ 20-Series GPUs with Max-Q design and 8th Generation Intel® Core™ i7 processor. Zephyrus S GX701 features a 17-inch display with a 144Hz refresh rate, and frames it with super-narrow bezels. It also adds NVIDIA G-SYNC™ and Optimus™ technology into the mix. The PANTONE® Validated panel is ideal for immersive gaming or serious content creation. ProArt™ TruColor Technology guarantees color accuracy that is better than most desktop monitors.

Even with these upgrades and a much larger screen, Zephyrus S GX701 maintains an impressively slender profile and surprisingly compact footprint. It fits most conventional laptop bags and backpacks thanks to its slim 6.9mm bezels that allow the massive 17.3-inch screen to squeeze into a body just 15.7 inches wide. It’s the most compact 17-inch gaming notebook around, and at only 18.7mm, it’s also the thinnest.

A potent processor allows Zephyrus S GX701 to tackle any task with confidence. The 8th Gen Intel Core i7-8750H CPU boasts six cores and 12 threads with a peak Turbo clock of 4.1GHz.

There’s up to 24GB of fast DDR4-2666 system memory and up to 8GB of separate GDDR6 VRAM. Superfast storage is supplied by an NVMe SSD with up to 1TB of capacity and four lanes of PCI Express® 3.0 bandwidth.

To avoid compromising performance, the innovative Active Aerodynamic System (AAS) exposes a large intake when the lid is lifted to increase airflow compared to traditional designs. It draws additional air through vents above the keyboard, and dual fans propel it all through four heatsinks and exhaust vents flanking the rear corners to ensure Zephyrus S GX701 runs cool in all conditions.

Fan speeds are controlled by an intelligent algorithm that responds automatically to temperature changes. Users can choose between three expertly tuned profiles via a convenient keyboard shortcut to quickly adapt to different usage scenarios.

Zephyrus S GX701 is a first gaming laptop capable of being powered by DC or USB Type-C™ (USB-C™) input. With support for USB Power Delivery, it can handle everyday work powered by a 65W Type-C adapter that’s much smaller than the required AC adapter for maximum gaming performance.

And thanks to Aura RGB technology – each key is illuminated by an independent RGB LED capable of producing a brilliant glow at peak brightness. Users can easily customize the intensity and configure colors and effects to suit different scenarios, like identifying important keys for specific games and choosing a subtler look for serious work.

Zephyrus S GX531

Putting high-end gaming components into an ultra-slim laptop is exceedingly difficult, especially when targeting a thinner chassis than ever before, but the Zephyrus S GX531 delivers with a remarkably compact body that’s a testament to ROG’s engineering prowess. The slender exterior measures nearly 15mm thin and leverages a 15.6” display with super-narrow bezels to squeeze into a smaller footprint, so you can easily stuff the system into bags made for laptops with much less power.

The ROG Zephyrus S GX531 lowers its profile without scaling back on specifications. You get cutting-edge parts like the latest Intel Core i7-8750H CPU, a premium 144Hz refresh rate display plus all the ROG essentials. They are just squeezed into a slimmer package that lacks some of the extras available in the new compact 17” ROG Zephyrus S GX701. That makes the smaller Zephyrus S a more focused alternative for people who prioritize portability above everything else.

ROG Strix SCAR II GL504/GL704

ROG Strix occupies a more mainstream middle ground between beast-like desktop replacements and premium ultra-slim gaming laptops.

Built for the FPS side of the esports arena, the ROG Strix SCAR II comes in 15.6” and 17.3” flavors available with the same 144Hz refresh rate and 3ms response time. Both versions are draped in a shooter-inspired motif that uses splashes of camouflage to create a unique aesthetic fit for the battlefield. Highlighted WASD keys further reinforce the SCAR’s roots and ensure that you can easily find the home row for FPS gaming.

The NVIDIA GeForce RTX 2060 GPU gives the 15” SCAR II GL504GV and 17” SCAR II GL704GV enough horsepower to drive triple-digit frame rates in popular shooters. Serious gamers should upgrade to the GeForce RTX 2070, though; the SCAR II GL504GW and GL704GW offer this more powerful graphics with both screen sizes, providing additional performance headroom for competitive gaming, demanding AAA titles, and cutting-edge VR experiences. Choose between a larger 17” display that is more immersive and a compact 15” display that is more portable.

TUG Gaming FX505/FX705

Announced TUF Gaming FX505 and FX705, are durability-enhanced 15.6-inch and 17.3-inch gaming laptops that have been carefully engineered to deliver all the essentials needed for high-end gaming experiences at affordable prices.

Both feature FHD IPS-level NanoEdge displays with refresh rates up to 144Hz, delivering ultra-smooth and clear gameplay that avoids blurring. The matte non-reflective displays cover the entire sRGB color gamut and produce vivid colors even at wide viewing angles.

Powered by up to an 8th Generation Intel Core i7-8750H CPU, a next-gen workhorse with six cores and 12 threads, not only capable of providing best-in-class gaming experiences, but also able to process multithreaded workloads much faster than the previous generation. Both models feature up to an NVIDIA GeForce GTX 1060 GPU, supremely capable of high-framerate gaming at FHD resolution. Up to 32GB of DDR4 2666MHz RAM, a 512GB PCIe® SSD, and a 1TB FireCuda™ solid-state hybrid drive (SSHD) ensure snappy Windows performance and fast game-load times.

As with all TUF Gaming products, FX505 and FX705 are built to withstand everyday abuse. They are put through rigorous quality and durability tests that exceed industry standards, and they have also passed the demanding military-grade MIL-STD-810G test for sudden jolts.

AVAILABILITY & PRICING ROG Strix SCAR II models are already available while the ROG Zephyrus S and TUF Gaming are available at selected retailers from next month.

ProductAvailabilityWhere to buyMSRP (ZAR)ZenBook Pro 14MarchDionwiredFrom R29,999ZenBook 13MarchDionwiredFrom R22,999ZenBook 14FebtakealotFrom R17,999ZenBook 15FebtakealotFrom R25,999ZenBook Flip 15FebtakealotFrom R29,999ZenBook Flip 13MarchtakealotFrom R21,999VivoBook 14MarchtakealotFrom R8,999VivoBook 15MarchtakealotFrom R12,999ROG Zephyrus S 17FebEvetechFrom R65,999ROG Zephyrus S 15FebEvetechFrom R49,999ROG Strix Scar II 17AvailableEvetechFrom R42,999ROG Strix Scar II 15AvailableEvetechFrom R44,999TUF GAMING 17MarchEvetech, takealotFrom R18,999TUF GAMING 15AvailableIncredible ConnectionFrom R18,999

[kindlecomparedinfo]

Gjemeni, pronounced Gemini, is a new furniture-on-demand service from founder Sean Pathiratne. The company offers decidedly tech-forward furniture that comes in a single box and can be assembled by anyone in a few minutes.

Pathiratne sees his company as a fashionable and agile furniture company that brings stylish stuff to your living room in the vein of Zara or H&M.

“We can create and deliver on trends through our technology-led global supply chain with the agility and speed of ‘fast fashion.’ We are ‘fast furniture,’” said Pathiratne.

“I live and work in Silicon Valley. I spend a lot of time in WeWork and other co-working places, in the offices of start-ups, and with tech friends,” said Pathiratne . “I observed how millennials live and work. They are a restless bunch physically – which mirrors their restlessness overall. They don’t like the status quo in business or with the objects in their lives. They are constantly shifting and fidgeting on their sofas. They just couldn’t find the right positions. After all, today we are checking our smart phones one minute, leaning back and contemplating the world another minute.”

The result? A plugged-in couch for the plugged-in generation.

“So the implications were obvious: create a multi-position couch for our multi-tasking world. A couch that meets people where they are, rather than the other way around. And also make sure that the next- gen couch had connectivity for the generation that is always plugged in,” he said.

The Gjemeni flagship is a convertible couch that turns from stark seating system into a lie-flat futon. Both sides of the couch have power and USB ports and it has three resting positions.

The company also sells a chair and an ottoman. Each product, from the $999 couch to the $299 leg rest, comes in a massive box that opens to reveal the furniture and a set of legs. To build the stuff you simply snap the legs into the holes on the bottom and flip the couch upright.

I tested one of the couches and can report that it would make a great startup-office seat. The styling, the firmness, and the clever charging ports mean that you can easily make your visitors feel powered-up and comfortable. As a home couch, however, I would recommend trying before you buy. First, at 6.5 feet long, there isn’t much room on the couch for more than two people let alone a small family. Further, the two reclining options are not conducive to many traditional couch activities except, perhaps, for the aftermath of Netflix and chill. The two sides of the back of the couch move from upright to reclined. When upright it is set at almost at 90 degrees – a TV lounging nightmare – and when slightly reclined you fall into a napping position. There is no “just right” with this couch for the home user.

That said this is furniture and your experience may differ. The company offers a 60-day money back guarantee as long as you keep the massive box and at $999 it makes perfect sense to take a flyer on this one. In fact, that’s the point. Like other furniture services, Gjemeni plans to disrupt the visit to Ikea or the furniture store. Because setup is so simple there is little harm in giving it a go and sending it back if you don’t like the size, the firmness, or the fit.

After all, said Pathiratne, the company is all about self-awareness.

“We are built to harness technology in pursuit of wellness. Gjemeni meets our ergonomic needs to relieve pressure on the back and spine, and to adjust so that we can take a power nap (we all know how important sleep is to wellness) or simply meditate and ground ourselves,” said Pathiratne.

from RSSMix.com Mix ID 8176395 https://techcrunch.com/2018/10/22/gjemeni-puts-your-couch-in-a-box/ via http://www.kindlecompared.com/kindle-comparison/

Gjemeni puts your couch in a box Gjemeni, pronounced Gemini, is a new furniture-on-demand service from founder Sean Pathiratne. The company offers decidedly tech-forward furniture that comes in a single box and can be assembled by anyone in a few minutes.

[bwprowl]

TakaraTomy’s latest entries in their Transformers run get a look at first tonight, along with the formal reveal and pre-order of the new Nendoroid from a video game that’s kinda popular. Then we’ve got pre-orders for toys bringing back the anime boom of yesteryear, with another Nendoroid of the classic variety, and Bandai of America trying to bottle that Dragonball lightning again. Plus a quick peek at a new Pokemon toy that caught my eye, and a new Transformer hot off the shelf onto my desk, tonight on Tuesday Night Toys!

New Stuff: Fine China

After seemingly staying quiet for some time, TakaraTomy finally saw fit to show off the next entries in their collector-geared Legends line: Targetmaster versions of Kup and Hot Rod, and Sharkticon with a bonus Sweep head. The Targetmasters continue to go as ambitiously above-and-beyond as TT has been getting lately, including multiple retooled parts (including new arms for Kup and a flip-down engine cover for Hot Rod) and completely new-tooling figures of the transformable gun-buddies. Those look great, though a couple things are rather off. Hot Rod’s got his proper magenta colors here, though his flame decal is looking a bit oddly stained-glass-ish. Kup’s colors are the real question mark, desaturating his distinctive teal all the way down to a mix of greys. This seems to be the result of Takara referencing some particularly poorly-colored models from late G1 episodes, and leaves it looking, as a friend of mine said, like a toy of Kup’s corpse. That aside, the new Targetmasters still look very good, and will likely still be worth it to those going in for the new tooling.

Hey TT, if you wanted to throw together a pack of Nightstick and Fracas, I’d be totally okay with that.

Sharkticon is predictably done up in a more specifically cartoony color scheme, and includes an amusingly Wario-esque alternate ‘Sweep’ head for the Scourge body. It’s nice of them to pack two troop-builders together.

Nendoroid Mei from Overwatch was fully revealed and put up for pre-order yesterday. She continues the detailed standard set by Tracer, good to see GSC is not just phoning these ones in. She includes a removable Snowball who can be set up with an effect for her Ultimate (the description even suggests you set up other Nendoroids ‘frozen in place’ within it). Sadly, no tiny Ice Wall or defensive block is included, those would’ve really pushed Snow Waifu over the edge. These Overwatch Nendos could maybe benefit from Zelda-style DX releases with bonus accessories. As-is, she still looks great, and they know people are going to buy her anyway. Apparently Mercy will be next.

Wishlist: Runnin’ in the 90’s

Nendoroid Lum from Urusei Yatsura went up earlier. The classic Alien Girlfriend getting a new toy like this just this year shows the endearing popularity of Takahashi’s formative rom-com, and the toy looks to be a good choice for anyone still nostalgic for it.

I saw that the first few of Bandai of America’s Dragon Stars line of six-inch Dragonball figures was up for pre-order, and that led me down a rabbit hole of finding out that they were actually launching a full Dragonball Super toy line for aisles over here! Not just these premium collector figures, there are also little blind-bagged spin-battling figures, collectible figurines, a fan-launching Goku, and these goofy things that apparently flex and their shirts fall off. It even includes role-play toys like deluxe Scouters and what is probably the greatest Dragonball cosplay accessory ever: A wristband with a firing Kamehameha.

Oh god anyone actually remember Karate Fighters?

Seeing all these clearly kids-play focused gewgaws makes the impending rollout of Dragonball Super in the west an interesting anticipation. DBZ was indeed hot shit in the late 90’s/early 00’s, and toys not unlike these ones were available to kids like me. Bandai made a lot of money off the franchise, and it’ll be interesting to see if they can repeat that success nearly two decades later.

Tangentially, Tamashii’s World Tour exclusives include this very nice-looking Kaioh-Ken-effect Goku SHF.

I haven’t paid enough attention to Tomy’s stateside Pokemon line. For all that some people gripe that Nintendo doesn’t release toys of enough of the Pokemon, Tomy does seem to do their best to make multitudes of miniature and posable figures of a variety of the cute little bastards. Notably, I was in the aisles the other day and came across a new figure they’re done of Mega Mawile! Mawile’s been a sleeper favorite of mine for some time now, and the Mega form was welcome when it appeared in Gen 6, and this new figure is an impressive, decently posable rendition of it. Nice to see Tomy willing to throw some unexpected choices out there along with all the Starters and Eeveelutions. I’ll have to grab this thing at some point, to indicate to them that I’d like more like it.

On-Desk: Couldn’t hit him

Hasbro’s distribution on Transformers has been nothing if not consistent lately. I hear people are finding that Chaos on Velocitron pack in Toys R Us across the country, so I head to my local TRU and there it is! Now just the last few days everyone has been finding the new Broadside in stores, and indeed, I found one for myself. Broadside was an anticipated release for me, not just for completing the Autobot Triple Changers or adding one more to a modern Wreckers lineup, but because he’s always been a rather unique design with a particularly underrepresented alternate mode. So how is the toy itself?

Titans Return Broadside is a ‘retool’ of Alpha Trion in the same way a chicken burrito is like a chicken salad. Some of the same ingredients are there but you’d probably need someone else pointing it out to even notice. Broadside really is pretty much a whole new toy. The robot mode is one of the looser reinterpretations we’ve gotten from the otherwise stringently G1-accurate Titans Return, sporting the character’s artwork-distinctive ‘broad’ grey chest with a cockpit bit in it, and in spite of ‘only’ being a Voyager-class toy, does a good job of ‘looking’ bigger than average, the way Broadside has often been shown in comics. Lots of bits besides his chest contribute to this, from his thick lower legs with the fins jutting out even further in front of them, to his big meaty mitt-hands, to his solid block of a face. He just conveys size, something that’s always cool when toys of any scale do it.

Transformation to his jet mode is shockingly simpler than I was expecting, especially after the enjoyably involved conversions of the previous wave’s Megatron and Optimus. You really just angle his legs up, shift the arms down, and flip up the nose and you’re there! It definitely is more than the sum of its parts, at least. Once it’s all in the right position everything converges together into a decidedly fantastical but still cohesive jet mode. Once again it commands a sense of size, with the bulky back end and chunky cockpit with its big bubble window that can easily be popped open to seat his Titan Master (delightfully named ‘Blunderbuss’). Thanks to a couple well-placed pegs and clips, it even holds together decently, in spite of playing fast and loose with how the transformation itself works. Still, this is definitely the ‘third mode’ of the Triple Changer.

So would a Broadside gijinka just be a KanColle?

The ‘main’ alternate mode would of course be Broadside’s aircraft carrier form. Fully stretching out the robot’s frame and pegging together panels on the top to achieve the ‘deck’ of the ship, this mode delivers the most fully on the ‘big’ promises of this toy. It’s as long as possible, and even stands high thanks to some creative ‘landing gear’ that folds down from the bottom, to help it set stable. There’s a wide variety of details on top of the deck, selling the idea that this is a big ship with lots going on, including an ID number, a runway (made up of some stickers that could be better) a tiny little scale control tower, and plenty of spaces and areas sculpted in for planes (and more on those in a minute). If there are some imperfections like the stickers and top panels not lining up perfectly flush, it’s all kind of swept away in the overall appeal of the toy achieving a big, unique mode like this.

Broadside is complimented with one of the coolest extras I’ve seen included with a mainline TF in some time: A sprue of absolutely tiny scale airplanes, which are actually sculpted in the likenesses of the Combiner Wars Aerialbots! You clip these off and they’ve got holes on their undersides to peg into the standard-scale tiny pegs that all TR toys have in some places (nominally to let Titan Masters stand on them). In Broadside’s case, the deck of his carrier mode is loaded with a bunch of those things, letting the planes be pegged in a multitude of different positions all over it, completing the look of an aircraft carrier and fully selling the size and scale of the thing once and for all. It rather awesomely turns the whole thing into a mini vehicle playset of sorts. It truly brings the toy to life in this mode, and was a super-cool thing for Hasbro to include. These tiny jets honestly make this toy.

Meanwhile, you can flip over the control tower for probably the goofiest Titan Master seating option in the entire line.

Broadside is far from perfect, with each mode having its share of issues or shortcomings. But it’s the way all the good parts those modes also have come together that makes him work as well as he does. He’s unique and fun to play with, and the bonus of the tiny Aerialbots is just a hoot (you can even peg them onto him in robot mode to sell the idea that he’s super-huge in that form). I know most are going to get him just to complete one or another ‘set’ with previous toys, but he is totally worth getting on his own merits.

I’ll see you all next time, and as always, I hope you have fun!

[azuregold]

(struggling to figure out how to ask all of them... also obv no spoilers ;u;) okay for character specific questions: 13 I don't think I've questioned any character's actions so ┐( シ)┌ 14 I guess Zoro?? maybe Travis 21 tell me about the human experiences of Luffy! 22 Zoro 30 eh just ramble about the Straw Hats living human lives? 42, 43, 49 & 50 all of the crew when they were in Earthverse !

These were fun! Well, most of them. For questions 21, 30, 42, 43, 49, and 50…they aren't things I've thought too much about before. I'm not in the right frame of mind to try at the moment and I didn't want to let the ask sit there unanswered until I did manage to think of something, so I'm just going to go ahead and skip them for now, sorry! ^^;

1: what inspires you?

Having a good idea I can be excited about? IDK. X'D

2: one of your favorite comments/reviews on this chapter/verse?

I love all my comments. ;u; I love the comments that go into detail about what they thought, the comments that are just a mess of flailing, the comments that tell me they stayed up all night reading, the comments that are just a line or two to say they liked it, and everything in between. Even if I could decide on one to use as an example, I wouldn't want to make anyone feel like I didn't appreciate their comment because it didn't look like that one.

3: what motivates you?

Being excited about an idea, getting to write a part I've been looking forward to, getting a nice comment on a fic, having the house to myself.

4: what time of the day/night do you like to write?

Either afternoon or at night once my mom's gone to bed.

5: do you write scenes in a linear fashion or do you write future scenes/dialogues sometimes?

I'll write snippets of future scenes if I think of something I don't want to lose, but otherwise I write pretty much linearly (aside from going back to rewrite previous scenes/chapters).

6: hardest/easiest character to write for?

I don't know if any of them are easy, exactly. It also depends on the scene and what they're going to be doing. Sometimes I know exactly how they'll behave, and sometimes I just can't picture how a character would react to a particular event or line of dialogue.

But generally Zoro isn't too bad. (Also Travis, because he's my character, though that still doesn't mean I know how he'll respond to things all the time, unfortunately.) Hardest is probably Flirty!Sanji and Franky. I've never tried writing from Franky's point of view, but he's hard enough from someone else's that I'm not eager to try. Chopper and Robin aren't too bad from someone else's POV, but I think I might have trouble writing from theirs. And Luffy can be difficult occasionally, depending on the situation. (Also Sven is hard, even though he’s my character.)

7: hardest/easiest verse to write for?

Well, I only have one at the moment, so… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Though once I actually start writing some of my other ideas, I have a feeling Mistyverse will still be the easiest, just because I've been working in it for so long.

8: (if you have either or both) how do you manage time with writing, work, school etc.?

Very badly. ^^;; I'm terrible at time management.

9: what tv shows, books, or movies inspire for this verse, if any?

Story-wise, I can't think of anything specific (there may have been and I've just forgotten, but). Character-wise, Archer from Fate/Stay Night and Furuya Rei/Amuro Tōru/Bourbon from Detective Conan were a big influence when I was developing Travis.

10: any writing advice?

I don't feel confident enough to give advice to other people, haha.

11: (if you use) what do you like about archiveofourown?

The tag system. It can be very helpful in finding a certain subject or giving me a better idea of what the fic is about. Also the "mark for later" option. And the ability to have a series. It makes it much easier not to miss things when there are multiple fics in a story. And I like that the author isn't sent a notice when someone subscribes/can’t see the names of people who have subscribed. I feel much less awkward about subscribing to fics that are years old or about a very guilty pleasure. :P

12: anything you would do to make archiveofourown different/change it?

I…kind of have a list…

– Add a way to sort subscriptions by fandom! Sometimes I want to reread fic for a particular series and if I don't remember the title(s), going through multiple pages of fics and opening them one by one is such a pain.

– Give us a way to mark main vs. minor characters and relationships in fics. It's really annoying searching for fics about a certain character or pairing and getting dozens of fics that focus on someone/thing else entirely, with whatever you were looking for getting maybe a couple of scenes in the background. I've seen authors try to tag things to indicate this themselves, but most (including me ^^; ) don't do it, and in any case, I'd like an actual option I can mark in a search.

– It'd be cool to be able to put spoiler warnings on tags. Click to view, highlight, something.

– Filter IDs are very helpful, but it would be so much easier if we could just click a button to exclude things like explicit fics, “multi” fics (I’m so tired of being overrun with smutty “multi” fics when I search for “gen” without a filter), NOTPs, fandoms I don’t like…and so on.

– Being able to choose whether or not crossovers are included in the search results. I like a good crossover, but sometimes I just want fics for the one series.

– Don’t have author replies count under total number of comments. Also a PM system would be nice.

(If any of this is possible and it’s just that I don’t know about it, someone please tell me. X’D)

14: what is the arc for this character (redemption, etc.)?

I find it hard to put things like this into words (and I don't want to give spoilers), so…I'm going to pass on this as well. ^^;

15: ask me any spoilers you’re curious about for a verse, and i’ll post the answer in the tags

I'm glad you didn't ask for any because usually I love giving spoilers but we're far enough into the story now that most things I could say are Big Spoilers for the climax/ending that I really don't want to give away ahead of time. So thanks for not tempting me. XD

16: do you ever hand write? why or why not?

Once in a long while, if I think of a line I don't want to forget after I've turned my computer off, I'll jot it down on a notepad so I'll remember it the next day. Otherwise, no. My handwriting is slow as molasses and makes my hand tired. ^^;

17: do you listen to music while you write?

Almost always. 8D Just instrumentals, though.

18: any fanmixes you’ve made for this fic/verse?

Not really, no. I have a playlist I use when I'm writing scenes with Travis, and I'm working on one for fight scenes in general, but that's the closest I've got.

19: any edits or art you’ve made for this fic/verse/any edits readers have made? if not, what visuals would you use for one?

All the art I've posted for Mistyverse is here (If I get any fanart in the future, that's where it will be, too). I have quite a bit of art I haven't posted, mostly of Travis or unfinished attempts to draw specific scenes (I have an attempted map of the island in OtMS that I'm too embarrassed to look at again X'D).

20: what songs were you listening to during this scene/chapter?Mostly I just shuffle my giant instrumental playlist. Or if I'm in the mood for something new, I go looking on YouTube or similar places for writing playlists. As far as music for specific scenes/chapters, I think I pretty much covered that in question 13 here.

22: favorite line/quote/inner monologue from this character?

Zoro… At the moment, probably:

Zoro's heart had nearly stopped when he'd seen those hands. Or it would have, if he'd still had one.

Damn it, when did I start stealing Brook's lines?

23: feelings on epistolary fic?

It can be interesting. c: I like it best when letters/diary entries/whatever are mixed with more traditional narrative, but they can make for a fun story.

24: do you outline?

Yep! Not super-detailed outlines, usually, but I prefer having some sense of where things are going.

25: if you outline, do you edit it frequently?

Not that often, no. I don't think I've even looked at the outline for FMaA in a while, actually, because things got very vague toward the end, outside of a few specifics, and I have most of the necessary info in my head at this point.

26: anything you’re planning to write in your fic that you’re worried readers might like?

I think this is supposed to be "that you're worried readers might not like". Because otherwise…why would someone liking my stuff make me worried? Barring creepy stalkers and the like. Assuming it's "not"…

Ohhh yeah. I might hide under the covers for about a week when I post those parts… X’D

27: when you read fic, how often do you comment?

Not…very often. ;;OTL I know how much comments mean to writers, especially now that I've had firsthand experience, but I still find it a difficult thing to do. And lately, when I do comment, more often than not I do it anonymously, even if all I have to say is praise. It's just more comfortable for me that way. If I leave a signed in comment, it usually means I really liked the fic.

28: any scene/line you wrote that you didn’t expect to write/that surprised you once it was written?

Uhh…first thing that comes to mind is when they were at the museum and got roped into playing themselves. I had planned for their disguises to be seen through and for it to be assumed that they were cosplaying, but the rest of it just sort of happened. Including Maya; I knew she was going to be in the story, but I didn’t know she was going to be on that island or working at the museum until she showed up in the fruit room. X’D I don’t even remember how I was originally going to introduce her, except that it was going to be a lot closer to the end.

29: do you eat or drink anything while you write?

Not while I'm writing, but I like to have a drink and sometimes a snack before I start. Most often chai. It helps me get in the mood.

32: what are your stats for this story/verse?

Is…this supposed to mean, like…number of kudos/comments/hits. etc? If it means something else, someone tell me and I'll adjust my answer. :P

Just doing the two main fics (and on FFN the shorts are part of OtMS anyway, so):

On the Misty Shore

AO3 – Kudos: 75, Comments: 11, Bookmarks: 10, Hits: 1350

FFN – Reviews: 86, Favorites: 165, Followers: 63, Communities: 1, Views: 21,005

From Mist and Ashes

AO3 – Kudos: 117, Comments: 37, Bookmarks: 17, Hits: 1739

FFN – Reviews: 94, Favorites: 101, Followers: 129, Views: 11.433

33: favorite one-shot you’ve written?

Ah…hmm. I haven't actually written any one-shots as in "self-contained, stand-alone story" yet (I have plans!). Out of the one-shot extras that I wrote for Mistyverse…maybe Proof? It was the most self-indulgent of the three and the most fun to write.

34: a scene/paragraph you wrote that you’re proud of

I'm pretty happy with most of the stuff in chapters 18 and 19…and the scene in 16 where Zoro reveals himself…and Zoro and Travis’s fight in the museum in 15…and probably more that I’m not thinking of, but I’m not going to reread the whole thing again right now. :P

35: any foreshadowing/symbolism you wrote that you hope readers didn’t miss?

Yes, but at the same time I hope most people don't put the pieces together until things get revealed later.

36: any scenes you wrote that parallel the canon verse?

I guess maybe the stuff with Zoro and Chidori in 17? Kind of?

37: do you use quotes in the beginning notes/intro to your chapters? if so, what are some of your favorites/what are their significance?

Nope, I don't.

38: do you title your chapters? what’s your favorite chapter title? what’s its significance/why did you choose it?

Yes, I love titling chapters. Even when I can't think of anything good. Favorite chapter title is definitely Law and Order. Because it has a double meaning/pun (the structure and rules of Whitestone + Law showing up at the end).

39: any alternate fic titles you were considering for this verse?

I had a couple others I was playing with, at least for FMaA, but who knows what they were? Not me. XD

40: chapter you’re most proud of in this verse?

At the moment, I'd say it's a tossup between 15, 16, 18, and 19.

41: chapter that was the most fun to write in this verse?

Hmm. 12 was the easiest, and it's always fun when I'm not struggling with a chapter. The whole arc on Crinia (chapters 13 – 15) was pretty fun, even when it got difficult. 18 – 19, too. And I felt like chapter 20 was crap while I was writing it, but it was silly fun, and it doesn't seem as terrible when I reread it now.

44: have you shared your outline with anyone? if so, what did they think of it?

The outline itself, no. Parts of it are pretty different from what I actually ended up writing; it might be fun to share some of it sometime. c:

45: anyone you share excerpts with?

*pokes you​* And I've posted a few here before, too. They're usually pretty short, though. Just a line or two.

46: story with the most kudos (AO3)?

From Mist and Ashes.

47: story with the most comments?

From Mist and Ashes again. :P

48: a happy future moment you’ve written/have planned for this ship? (will post under read more for spoilers)

*ignores the "ship" part* Hmm…I have no idea if I'll ever actually write it, but in my list of ideas for FMaA bonus scenes I have one where Zoro cooks for everyone (just because he can't eat anymore doesn't mean he can't cook—he lived on that island by himself for a long time before he died, after all). Also (for the benefit of anyone else reading this), sircerenade and I have discussed Brook and Zoro bonding over stuff before (being "grandpa figures", sharing skull/ghost jokes, etc.). Some of it may be more bittersweet than happy, but it’s a cute bittersweet, so.

[paragon-yoshi]

My feelings on the Pokemon Anime!

Taken from my DeviantArt journal.

Long ago, I asked various people on what is so great about the Pokemon anime. The main one with Ash as the (never dying/quitting) protagonist. I enjoyed it as a kid for some time. But as I grew up, I learned to hate it. It's such a nonsensical mess... And yet people love it to bits, for some incomprehensible reason. In fact, if there were to be a movie scene to describe, how incomprehensible this is to me... The "Ass Movie" scene from Idiocracy would be a perfect fit. (Go look it up yourself. It shouldn't be hard to find on YouTube. ;) ) With everyone loving it, but me as the only one who can't believe the people around myself. So I tried to understand, why people like it so much. Because I seriously can't understand how grown up people can enjoy such a trippy, random mess of events. Especially Pokemon-Fans, considering the Anime is a very poor representation of the Pokemon-games... So I asked around... It's been a while, since then. But the people I asked seem to agree with some of the criticism the anime receives. But they don't mind it too much. The good things the anime has is enough for them to enjoy. Or they find Ash an interesting character to follow, despite how much the writers decide to misuse him... Or it is about the better look at the world of Pokemon and the Pokemon themselves... Or to see what other forms of competitions are there in the Pokemon-World, outside of battles. I still don't agree with most of them. But if they can enjoy it, then all is good. But sadly, I can't! Despite liking the main games, I have a lot of problems with the Pokemon-Series in general. The main anime is at the top of my list! I have a VERY harsh opinion of the Pokemon Anime. One that I will share with you now. If you are sensitive about stuff like this, then you better stop reading now. You have been warned... To be fair, not everything about the anime is terrible. It does have some good things going for it. The aforementioned better look on the world, seeing what wild Pokemon do outside of battling and seeing other forms of competition, like sled races and such.

So basicly a mix of expanding upon the world seen in the games, Pokemon Wildlife Documentary and action-packed battling.

And if it were only that, I would probably enjoy it. But sadly, it has a lot of terrible things, ruining all the good stuff for me. So much, that I hate it, regardless of the things it did correct! The trippy, random things. Such as Jessie, James and Meowth constantly attacking the party with "Dr. Robotnik" machines. Them always getting blasted, giant Pokemon mimicing Godzilla, Mecha-Pokemon, men with boobs, etc. etc. This is the primary reason, why I think the story writers must be on a drug-trip, on their jobs. I can't explain why else, people would put this in a Pokemon-related thing and think of it as a good idea. It's not funny... It's CRINGEWORTHY! And more importantly, THIS ISN'T POKEMON!!! Pokemon isn't fighting Dr. Robotnik/Dr. Wily machines over and over again... Or fighting mechs in general... Or Pokemon pulling a Godzilla, growing massive and destroying entire cities... There are too much of these stupid things happening in the anime. Far more than I can count or remember... But I know one thing: THEY ARE STUPID AND HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH POKEMON!! It doesn't tell a good story or develops the main character well. Story-writing and character development is something I expect from every sort of storytelling, including animes. A good story and characters that grow, learn and develop over time, make a story compelling. But the anime story-writers completely fail at this! It is obvious to me now, that storytelling and character development was never a factor in the making of this anime. It's all about the cash-in and advertisement. Which is exactly why it's so bad! And the thing that makes it most obvious to me, that they don't really care about developing Ash as a character... Is the fact that they always push the "Reset Button" at the end of every reason, completely negating everything Ash has learned and making him start all over again in a different region. The most infuriating thing to most people, as I have seen. And I completely agree with the anger (though personally, I think there is an offense far worse than this one.). And I kinda feel sorry for Ash. I don't really see him as a bad character. Throughout most seasons, I think he had a cool design and in the anime he actually did some badass-things! It's a shame the story-writers never decided to make use of his full potential and instead use him as a cash-cow. Milking him for everything he is worth, instead of giving him closure and a strong ending. He has suffered the same fate as characters like "SpongeBob". SpongeBob was a great series and he himself a really likable character. Then the creator ran out of ideas and wanted to end the series. But SpongeBob was too much of financial success to Nickelodeon... They didn't want to lose their primary cash-cow! So they artifically extended the series, without the creator's blessing. The result was a massive loss in story and character quality. SpongeBob heavily deteriorated as a character, as a result! And a similar thing happened to Ash. He is a cash-cow and not a true character, like a should be! One thing about making a good character, is to know when to end his/her story! Every story has an end! So giving a character a fitting end and closure, and maybe passing the torch to the next main character, is something vital to making a good character. There are a lot of anime-series who do this right and have great characters as a result! Such as "Jojo's Bizarre Adventure" or even "Digimon". (Seriously, give the Rival-Monsters a chance! Their anime-series are FAR BETTER than the Pokemon anime will ever be!) Now you have Plot-Armor... Now you don't! The powers of Ash and his Pokemon are so inconsistent... One episode he can take down the Gym Leaders with ease, or even stand toe to toe with LEGENDARY POKEMON! While in another episode he loses to someone with the stupidest of excuses! And as the series went on, they decided to come up with the most ridiculous excuses to make Ash lose and keep him around. Such as creating a random, uninteresting character with a FULL LEGENDARY TEAM!! HOW DOES THAT MAKE ANY SENSE?!?!? But yeah, this stupid thing adds to the point of "Bad storytelling". The anime-writers are unwilling to have any other main characters Seriously, if they gave Ash closure in the Gen 1 season and started featuring the other seasons with a main character of their own, it'd be a much better anime. Such as an anime-version of "Gold" as the main protagonist of Gen 2, May as the main character of Gen 3, etc. And speaking of May, I have to ask one thing: Why are Pokemon Anime-makers in general so against the idea of a female lead?! Seriously in every Pokemon-anime in existence (not just the Ash-Anime!), it's always the male character featured. And the female counterpart is either not featured at all or is put in a much lesser role, than she should be. Ever since Crystal, we could pick our gender. Given that, is it really so bad for a female character to be the main character for once?! The anime doesn't represent the games well at all. For instance there are so many "Canonical Errors" in this anime-series! The most annoying thing is "Pokemon saying their own names". While in actuality they are supposed to make roars and noises, similar to real-life animals! Ok, in the game-canon there are SOME Pokemon, that do this. Such as Pikachu! But most Pokemon are supposed to make grunts, cries and roars. Not to mention Pokemon constantly saying their own names IS ABSOLUTE TORTURE TO LISTEN TO! Seriously, it's one of these things that give me the idea of forcing a running drill through my ears! And it is one of the reasons, why Pikachu is my least favourite Pokemon in the series! But then there are also a lot of other things: In-game characters being totally different in the anime, story-differences, etc etc. Basicly the anime not trying to capture the games. To be fair, in some of these instances, the changes were actually good. And it felt more like the anime "taking artistic liberties", rather than failing at completely capturing the games. But most of the changes are bad, rather than good. Prime example: The entirety of the Black/White season! With Team Plasma mind controlling Pokemon, rather than trying to liberate them. It was a story-change so bad, that the Pokemon Company finally had the balls to FIRE the story-writers. (Good riddance. They belong to rehab anyways...) Too bad the new ones aren't that much better... I'm not against changes in the story. But they should be well thought out and add to the experience, rather than taking away from it. But more often than not, the changes were absolutely terrible. And the few good ones don't exactly help it. Especially with the absolute worst offense the anime has done, in my opinion... Character Bastardization and the "Fan Character Curse" This is where I get really angry at the anime! Great characters from the games, that either not exist at all in the anime (such as Krys, Brendan or Wally!) or WORSE, are heavily bastardized. The best example of character bastardization happening in the anime, is May! An unpopular opinion perhaps. But May from the original Ruby and Sapphire is one my favourite characters in the series. In the Player-Role, she is the badass-trainer you can expect her to be. And in the Rival-Role, I found her to be lovable, yet slightly tomboyish and capable. Not to mention she had a cool design in the GBA-originals! She really looked like a brave adventurer. And to this day, she has my favourite design of any Player-Character in the series. (Screw the naysayers, I love her!) Which is why I find it so infuriating, how much the anime destroyed her character! In the anime, she basicly dislikes Pokemon and only takes on the trainer-route for travelling. Not to mention she is A FREAKING WUSS in the anime! She gets scared of every little thing happening. And is absolutely terrible as a trainer! Basicly the exact opposite, as she is in the games! And ultimately she was demoted to being Ash's tag-along, when she easily could've been the main character herself! I will come back to that later... And they did it to other characters as well. Such as Dawn or Serena! Who also easily could've been the main characters, but took on a much lesser role, that didn't do them justice at all! Or Maylene, who was first depicted as being absolutely useless as a Gym Leader, only growing capable under Ash's guidance. Or Korrina, who couldn't control Mega Evolution and was rather weak, when compared to the games, where she is the successor of her grandfather, who passed on the knowledge of Mega Evolution and passed it on to you. And considering that both Maylene and Korrina were my favourite Gym Leaders in the respective Gens, it breaks my heart to see them bastardized like this. And then they make terrible OCs like Max from the Gen 3. Did anyone even like this arrogant, obnoxious little piece of sh**?! And most of these bastardizations seem to happen, to give Ash more of a presence. This is where the "Fan Character Curse" part comes into play. For those of you who don't know: The "Fan Character Curse" is a phenomenon among fan-created works, mostly FanFictions. Where said fanworks feature canon characters, but make them weak or otherwise bastardize them, in order to promote their own Fan Characters. And as a result, completely negates the achievements and strength of the official characters, in said fanwork. This may be a phenomenon happening in fan-works most of the time. But Ash Ketchum is the prime example that even official characters can be guilty of this! Because seriously, the exact same thing is happening here! Many of the in-game characters are bastardized and/or are given a much less important role than they deserve, just to promote Ash! Which is why the anime feels like a badly written FanFiction most of the time! In honestly don't have anything else to say to this. There are other strange things about the anime, such as Ash constantly having human sidekicks (including two Gym Leaders in both Gen 1 and 2!). Why does he need them again...? And considering you always travel alone in the games, at least as far as humans are concerned, it just feels strange. But this isn't really bad, just strange. In any case, this is the end of my long essay. Summary So basicly, the anime doesn't fail completely. Expanding the world, seeing the Pokemon Wild Life, more competitions outside battling and action-packed Pokemon battles, are the things it does correctly! But the Canonical Errors, bad storytelling and character development, the random BS happening and the bastardization of characters from the games, is what makes it so unbearable! In my opinion it does far more things wrong, than correct! So for me "Pokemon Origins" remains as the only good Pokemon Anime series. It may be short and cut out a lot of criticial plot-points, to cram everything from Pokemon Red and Blue into 4 episodes. But what it did deliver, didn't disappoint at all! We saw Red starting out as a weakling, but he grew as a character, became champion and even caught Mewtwo in the end. These 4 episodes of Origins succeed, where 1000+ episodes of Pokemon Main Anime fail horribly! And I recently watched "Digimon Adventures 1 and 2" again. Since I had fond memories of them as well. And unlike the Pokemon Main Anime, they still hold up today. Simply because the Digimon-Anime takes their characters seriously. They grow and develop as characters and actually are given closure and a fitting end. It tells a good story, rather than being a 30 minutes advertisement. Seriously, I recommend the Digimon Anime series. They handle their characters so much better. So please give the Rival-Monsters a chance. You might be pleasantly surprised. And that is all I'm saying today. See ya! :D