#I also love how David told her about Tea

[jyoongim]

~BLOOD & BLISS~

Human!Alastor x wife!Reader

Themes: 1930 based! Human!Alastor x wife!Reader, domestic life! fluff, smut, devotion, slight manipulation, mention of children, pregnancy,  blood, murder, secrets 

In this chapter: slow build up! Smut! Love-making, Creampie, slight breeding kink

this chapter is VERY long!!!

Chapter one Chapter three

Chapter two

The sound of voices filled your home as the ladies chatted in your parlor.

“Oh honey is that peach cobbler? Why you would think it was Sunday with the spread you made.” Agnise said as you came from the kitchen with the dish and placed it on the dessert table, causing all the ladies to turn to you.

You had finger sandwiches filled with ham, beignets, one too many cakes, banana pudding, sweet tea and lemonade.

You were in a baking mood and since it was just high noon, you kept it lite for today’s meeting.

You let out a laugh “oh it was nothin’. Thought we deserved a treat since the last time we saw each other. We housewives deserve a little sugar sometimes.” The ladies giggled at your comment.

Grabbing a sandwich, you took a seat by Rosie, “Now what were y’all talking about while i was in the kitchen?”

”Abi was telling us the Smiths youngest was found in bed with that scrappy gent that worked down at the mill” Rosie said, sipping her tea. You gasped, hand over your heart “Ain’t that girl engaged to um oh what that boy’s name?” You snapped your fingers trying to think

”David Johnson” Abigail snickered “Just know Old smith threw a fit. I heard her mother went crying to the church shouting. Ooooh must have been real bad”

Agnise chimed in “Also Harriet told me that Elaine is expecting…and it ain’t her husband’s” shocked gasps filled the room. “Elaine? As in love the church, has three youngins Elaine? Oh that poor woman I don’t know how she do it” Rosie shuddered. Abigail smirked “Yeah poor Elaine, so who’s the father?”

Agnise chuckled “Take a guess”

Literally you, Rosie, and Abigail looked to each other puzzled.

”Pastor Brown from the next town over”  Agnise said.

squeals and laughs erupted from all of you.

You shook with laughter as you took a deep breathe. “Ok ok enough of that. How have y’all been?”

Rosie was running a boutique, New Orleans finest clothes and it was really taking off. She talked about how some cheap fabrics came in and she ain’t have a clue what to do with them.

Agnise happily chirped about how her two oldest had got accepted in some fancy school on the other of town.

Abigail complained that she thought the maid was stealing her clothes, claiming too many of her fine dresses were missing out of her closet.

”Oh dear how is that handsome husband of yours? I was hoping to the man when I was coming in.” Rosie said smiling. 

Rosie and Alastor were the closest besides Mimzy. He often dropped by to have her make your clothes and tailor some of his suits.

”Oh you know how Alastor is” you waved your hand, “he set out early this morning to the radio station. We’re suppose to down to Mimzy’s club tonight”

Agnise and Abigail looked at you shocked “That ol rigity joint? Oh darling no. That man makes good money, why y’all going down there?”

You had met Agnise and Abigail when you were in school.  They were a bit more Polish than Rosie who didn’t mind a good time.

”I think that lounge is rather charming. The music is good.” You defended.

”Well enjoy it now, I had a dream bout fishes and you know what that mean” Agnise said, giving you a knowing look.

You blinked, then blushed, taking a sip of tea. “I don’t know what you’re talking about” you feigned dumb.

She smirked, red lips curling “You’ve been hiding news from us haven’t you?”

Abigail looked at you, “Are you?”her honey eyes roamed over your figure.

”Ladies no! I’ve told y’all me and Alastor haven’t discussed children. We don’t have time for that” you said pouting at their accusations.

”What man don’t want his own running around? The two of you been married for a few years now, i had half expected at least something.” Agnise said.

”Alastor has just settled in good as radio host. What kind of wife would I be if I just randomly suggested having a little one running around? No I couldn’t.” You gripped your cup, looking down.

You and Alastor hadn’t really discussed children. You figured you would wait a few years to get settled into your marriage before thinking of children.

With alastor’s career taking off, you didn’t have it in you to just spring the notion on him.

You didn’t mind. It was quite nice not having to clean and look after a baby.

BUT 

You did want to potentially have children with Alastor.

The house would be a lot livier and you thought Alastor would make a great father.

”Y’all ain’t getting any younger dear!” Agnise said “i mean unless there’s a another woman invovled”

Rosie let out a hiss, glaring at the woman “Oh shush that! Alastor wouldn’t do that! He loves his wife too much to even look at another woman”

Agnise shrugged.

Abigail patted your hand “Honey don’t listen to her. I am sure you’ll have a whole litter running around afterwhile. Not having children ain’t all that grand.”

You pouted. That did not make you feel better.

Rosie seeemd to pick on up your down mood and interjected

”We came to discuss books! Enough of this husband and children talk! So we left off at Charles securing the mistress!”

The little gathering went on without a problem, but the comments and conversation still bounced in your head. 

Alastor wouldn’t seek out another woman just because I haven’t…right?

You and Alastor’s intimate life was fine to your knowledge.

 The man wasn’t the most affectionate, but he did try. 

He was loving and gave you anything you wanted.

THATS what any wife wanted right?

Not having children didn’t seem to make him any less doting with you.

But you still felt that nagging doubt as you tried to reassure yourself.

”Bye now! Tell Nathaniel I said hello and Abi please just see if the maid took your dress!”you hollered from your porch, waving the ladies as they smiled and walked down the street.

You sighed. Rosie had stayed behind and was cleaning up.

”oh Rosie you’re a guest please let me” you said grabbing the dirty dishes.

”I’ve been here so much this is practically my home girl please.”she laughed as she grabbed the tablecloth and put in in the hamper.

”Those two are certainly a handful. Don’t take what they said to heart. They are just bitter their husbands don’t love on them like yours” she chided.

You hummed. Rosie was right. What did it matter that you didn’t have kids? That didn’t change anything.

”I know Ro but I feel like I’m failing as a wife. But i promise I’m fine I swear” you quickly said as she gave you a look.

She looked at the clock “Oh my well look at the time! Do give Alastor my love dear”

You gave her a hug and walked her out, waving her goodbye as she waltzed down the road.

You were now alone.

The house was quiet and you had cleaned up everything so you wouldn’t have to look at the mess in the morning.

You rolled your shoulders, sighing at the tension and decided a quick nap wouldn’t hurt as you wait for Alastor to come home.

—————————————————————————————————

The sun began to slowly set through the trees as Alastor ran a bloody hand through his hair, the brown strands slicking back as he breathed deeply. The man had put up quite a fight, but luckily Alastor could quickly deal with his little problem. 

He had planned to take his wife out for tonight, but with the way he was feeling, he would rather be in your embrace and sleep.

He would stop and get you your favorite flowers as an apology and maybe cook for you instead. A soft smile appeared on his face as he imagined your face as he came in with flowers and kissed your soft lips as he propose hell cook for dinner.

Soft jazz would be playing and after the meal he would ask you to dance. Peppering your face in kisses as you laughed at him, thinking he was silly.

And maybe afterwards, he could indulge himself in you. A shiver ran through his body at the thought of your face contorted in pleasure. 

Oh yes he was sure you wouldn’t mind why he came home late

He hid away his shovel in an old storage house and changed clothes.

Getting in his car, he hummed along to the radio as he thought of what to make for dinner.

—————————————————————————————————-

Alastor softly closed the back door as he slowly set down the flowers and groceries. He peeked his head in the parlor and found you sleeping on the couch.

He quickly made his way upstairs, hid his clothes in the back of your closet, showered, and went back down stairs.

He grabbed the flowers and slowly slid beside you, pulling you into his lap.

You snuggled into his neck, eyebrows scrunching, waking up ”hmmm Alastor?” you groaned as he snickered. He pressed his lips to your plump cheek “Seems my darling wife had a very long day. Seems I got caught up at work and didn’t catch the time. But…” he pressed the flowers to your nose as you took a deep inhale of the flowers, smiling “I do hope you would forgive dear.”

Your heart fluttered at the man, standing to put the bouquet in a vase.

You caught sight of the time and gasped “oh no! I can’t believe I fell asleep for that long, lord on high I ain’t got a single thing out to cook.” You went to make your way to the kitchen, but Alastor was quick to wrap his arm around you, pulling you into his lanky frame. “Don’t you worry about dinner darlin’ I got it. I had promised you a night out and forgot. So to pay for my offense Ill cook dinner and why don’t you go upstairs and put on something pretty  for me hmm?” He pressed a few soft kisses along the column of your neck, making your breath hitch slightly, before patting your ass to get you moving towards the stairs.

Once you made it back downstairs, the smell of dinner made your stomach growl.

Alastor was just setting th plates as you entered the kitchen. “Book club must have been something today, I see you baked a lot of goods today. Good thing I checked before thinking of making dessert” He turned to actually look at you.

Gorgeous is what he thought as he took you in.

You opted for a simple slip dress that fell just before your knees. How enticing.

 You accessorized with your pearls and even had your hair curled slightly.

He couldn’t help but wrap his arms around your waist and bring a hand to his lips, kissing it as he looked at you with utter devotion.

”My my don’t you look lovely dear” he whistled, twirling you around slowly.

You blushed and looked towards the stove “Dinner smells great Al, what did you make?” He ushered you to the dining table and pulled you chair out for you to sit before fetching tonight’s dinner.

Shrimp and grits in one bowl and jambalaya.

For dessert he took a piece of butter cake that you made earlier and chilled sweet tea and lemonade.

You moaned in delight as the flavor of the jambalaya burned your mouth. “Oh Al! You added a bit more spice this time but it goes good with the grits. oh i love your jambalaya.” You praised him.

You practically danced in your seat as you ate causing Alastor to chuckle.

”I never tire of your praise for my mother’s recipe my dear. I must say this cake might just be my new favorite” he said.

You decided to fill him the latest gossip you heard today from the ladies

”Rosie sends her love by the way. Oh you would not believe what Agnise told us today…” you started.

Alastor had a lazy smile on his face as you talked animatedly about todays gossip. He nodded along and even gasped at the details you shared. You made him swear he wont repeat it anywhere, including on the radio.

You took a sip of lemonade ”Agnise made a comment that she was surprised we haven’t had kids yet. Can you believe that woman?” Alastor tilted his head “I wouldn’t put it pass that one. Well what did you say?”

Alastor asked taking in your reaction as you pouted, swirling your fork in your grits before stabbing a shrimp. You sighed “I told her that we just weren’t ready. I mean you just got settled in at the studio good. Then the nerve of that woman to say that you were probably seeing another because I wasn’t putting out.” You mumbled that part, feeling  pinges of doubt start to rise in you as you looked at him.

Alastor scoffed “darling I only ever had eyes for you” he reached across the table to grasp your hand, thumb fiddling with your wedding ring. “Nothing will make me look at you different. To me, you’re perfect. You are much more than I could ever deserve” he smiled at you. “Do you want children darlin?” He asked.

You blinked, a warm blush crept up your cheeks “I-I mean it might has crossed my mind once of twice, but I-I dont know” you looked away, feeling shy.

Alastor grinned “I think you would make a wonderful mother my dear. Through I will admit having to share you i dont know about that” he laughed “buuuuut if having children will make you happy, who am I to say no?” His voice dropped an octave as he smiled at you.

You were shocked. You hadn’t thought that Alastor would be open to having children. But you didn’t just want to have kids because of social pressure. You wanted it to be something you were sure of…

”Its a big responsibility if we have children Al”you whispered. He hummed, shrugging “Dear I make more than enough that our children will have comfortable upbringing, besides Ill be there the whole step of the way”

That reassurance made your heart swell.

You smiled, a soft laugh bubbling out of your chest “Then I guess well see what happens then huh?”

You finished dinner, Alastor leaving the dishes to soak and you giggled as he dragged you upstairs. “Alastor! Hahaha dont you have work tomorrow?” You entered your shared bedroom and squealed as he lavished your exposed shoulders in kisses.

He groaned in response as he unbuttoned his shirt as his hands gripped at your hips.

”what do that have to do with us delving into the throws of pleasures darlin? Its been quite some time since I’ve paid you proper attention.”

Your back hit the duvet as he situated himself between your thighs. Your dress bunched at your hips, exposing your lacy garter. His hand toyed with the fabric, lips curling in a smirk “Were you planing to seduce me dear?” You shook your head as you curled your arms around his neck, pulling his head to meet his lips.

”Hmmm lets keep the pearls and garter on” he grinned down at you.

”Nngh! Ah! Ah! Ha! Ah! Oh god!”you cried out as Alastor thrusted into you. Your fingers gripped at his hair as you moaned into his neck, kissing over the red bruises forming on his skin.

Fingers flexed on your thigh, keeping your leg pressed into your stomach. The only sound that filled the room were your sweet moans and his soft grunts and the slap slap of his dick burying into your cunt.

Alastor’s back muscles flexed as you raked a hand along his back, groaning as your nails left burning trails into his flesh.

”One more. You can give me one more can’t you darlin?” He asked huskily as he snapped his hips into yours.

Your body buzzed as your third orgasm approached. The pearl necklace that hung around your neck, bounced with your breasts as Alastor nipped at your neck. One of his hands crept up your chest to play with one of your nipples. Tugging and pinching the perk peak as your cunt clenched around him.

”I can’t wait to see you pregnant ma cher. All nice and round, carrying my child.”

A sharp pinch had you whining “These lovely tits of your full of milk god I can’t wait to taste it” his head shifted to your chest, his warm mouth taking the mound into his mouth. Teeth and tongue teased as his thrusts picked up pace.

”A-Al! Oh! Oh! P-Please!” You threw your head back in pleasure.

Alastor couldn’t help but let his twisted feelings take over, a hand wrapped around your throat, applying slight pressure as you whined.

He brought his face back to yours, nose brushing against yours as your swollen lips enticed him to suck and bite at them. He maneuvered both your thighs to be pressed against your stomach, giving him leverage to hammer into you soppy heat.

”You want me to give you a baby darlin? Hmm? Want me to fill the needy cunt of yours and spill my seed into you?”you moaned, eyes glazed with lust.

Alastor smirked “Use your words baby. C’mon” a harsh thrust made your toes curl.

”y-yes please please Alastor give me a baby!” You cried.

A wild look was in his eyes 

“Oh ill give you all the babies you want. I’ve wanted to see you swollen with my child since our wedding day. You’ll look so pretty baby. All filled with my cum and swollen. Yeeesss what a lovely sight you’ll make”

His thumb worked tight circles on your clit as your back arched into him as your orgasm ripped through you. Alastor slammed his lips on yours to swallow the loud moan that tried to spill from your lips.

He grunted as his hips shuddered. Chasing his orgasm as he rode yours out. With a hiss, his dick twitched and soon warm cream painted your gummy walls.

With a sigh, he coaxed his tongue against yours as he gave you a few more soft thrusts.

Panting and flushed, your legs fell limp as he pulled out and smirked at the mess he had made of you.  A white stream slowly pooling out of you.

Spent and feeling the blissful afterglow, you curled into the covers, wincing at the stickiness between your thighs. Alastor pulled you into his chest, kissing your forehead “normally Ill clean you up, but since were trying no need.” He brushed a curl out of your face as you began to fall asleep

”Alastor?” You said tiredly.

He hummed, as he ran his hand up and down your arm, admiring the red bruises on your neck and shoulder

”I love you”

He grinned as you dozed off.

”I love you too dear”

———————————————————————

Soooo what did you guys think??? Bit of a slow burn yes? we got a peak into what Alastor was doing hehehee

@nightshadelm @th3-st4r-gur1 @amurtan @lunaramune @southern-bayou-beau  @karolinda007-blog @simphornies @yourdoorisunlocked @nettaw @purplecatsandhearts @catherine1206 @jellibean2018 @thewinchestah @wonderlandangelsposts @alishii @readergirlstuff @missgurlsstuff @yuzurixx @darkovergrownforestnymph @dasimp777 @markster666 @alastorsgirl48 @alastor-simp @alastorsaries @preciousbabypeter @alastwhore666 @strawberrypimp666 @stawberrypimpsimp @queenariesofnarnia @peachedtvs @peachedtv @tpks @siiv3r @hazelfoureyes @okay-babe @aconfusedworld @chewbrry @altruisticalastor @yunimimii @dievia3 @alastorsdear @alastorsdarlingdoe @t0byisher3 @dennsfz @twismare @nanami1chu @yoongibabs @menthatilove @smoky000 @luzzbuzz @stygianoir @kiralaufeyson84 @for-hearthand-home @luzzbuzz

[fbfh]

curiosity is a wonderful thing - chapter 1

wc: 2k

genre: slice of life, slow burn, best friends to lovers

pairing: slowburn best friend ben! x fem daughter of alice!reader, current audrey x ben

warnings: audrey being a bitch, unnecessary amounts of tea, ben being ben, mildly implied nd reader

summary: after a junior royal council meeting, you hype up your best friend Ben to tell his parents about his plans for his first proclaimation as king.

song recs: main titles 1 2 & 3 - descendants score/david lawrence, cheshire kitten (we're all mad here) - sj tucker

a/n: THE NEW SERIES IS HERE!!!! I am so excited for this, it's been one of my comfort indulgence daydreams for the longest time so I'm really elated to share it with y'all. BIG FAT FANGZ TO CICI FOR BETA READING!!!!!! and fangz to you guys for reading!!!!! I hope you enjoy lol <333 have an optional outfit. as a treat.

tags @dustyinkpages @demirunner @strawberry-cake1 @kiara7777 @yesv01 @magcon7280

Audrey was shocked when Ben had first told her that you and he weren't dating. She knew that you were friends, best friends at that. Everyone in Auradon did. Everyone also knew that what you had between you couldn't possibly be just platonic, not with the way you look at each other, how much time you spend together, or how intimately you speak to each other. It’s like you have your own language.

Everyone in Auradon knows this, with the exception of you and Ben, apparently. Even now, in the middle of a junior royal council meeting, Aziz shares a pitying look with Herkie at the way Audrey holds onto Ben’s arm while he goes over the agenda. Neither of them miss the way her gaze flicks between you two, trying to see if you’re stealing glances. You’re seated at his right hand side, like you usually are, as he goes over the last few items on the agenda for the meeting today and try to pay as much attention as you can. You scribble in your notebook as he does, nibbling at a tea biscuit and trying not to miss any of the important bits. 

“...Facing a longstanding struggle to keep up with the increased demand of the textile industry,” Ben says, skimming through his papers. He glances up, and he knows no one is really paying attention except for you. “Looking to open up a- a more collaborative process of dialog with key workers in the textile industry, and unified front between all the major groups who paved the way to textiles as we know them today, while also compensating for the rise in automation.” 

Across the table, Chad yawns. Lonnie and Melody pass notes between them, at least attempting to be subtle about it. You listen to Ben continue to update everyone on the ongoing current events in Auradon, and your pen drifts away from taking notes as you do, and begins to scribble little shapes in the margins of your well loved notebook. Your other hand moves down under the table, adjusting your pale blue skirt and tugging at the elastic of your black and white striped stockings. Ben’s gaze flicks over to you as you adjust in your seat, tugging at the puffy sleeves of your white blouse a moment later. He can tell you’re starting to get fidgety, which means it’s about time to wrap all this up. Plus, he has a suit fitting in ten minutes that he can’t be late for, or else Lumier will probably char something by accident. 

“Negotiations are still in progress, and of course, we’re looking for any way possible to avoid an embargo. I think that’s the last thing anyone needs…” Ben trails off with a chuckle, only to be met with silence. He looks back at his paper, trying to find his place before the silence gets anymore awkward. Before he can, he hears you let out a puff of air in agreement. 

“That’s quite an understatement.” You smile up at him, catching his eye before you each return to your respective papers. Your Wonderlandian accent is comforting, like a familiar friend in a tough crowd. People have described your accent many ways, most concluding it’s somewhere between british and transatlantic, but you don’t think you have much of an accent at all. Ben says you do, and you trust his judgment on the topic. Audrey maintains a tight smile on her face as Ben gently frees his arm from her to look through his papers in more detail. Once he’s sure he’s not missing anything, he goes through the usual motions of wrapping up a junior council meeting. 

“All party planning committee members are welcome to hang back, the floor is yours,” He says to Audrey, gathering up all his papers with a smile. “Everyone else, thank you for your time as always, and have a good evening.” 

Ben heads to the door as people start to funnel out and make conversation. Audrey waits as the other people on the party planning committee move up the table to sit closer to her, glancing at you as you put your notebook, pens, notes, and teacup back into that teapot shaped bag you always carry. It’s enchanted with Wonderland magic, and it makes her uneasy. She thinks you should just get a tote bag, or backpack, like a normal person. 

“Bunny,” Ben calls from the doorway, getting your attention with the nickname he’s had for you for years. Her train of thought quickly turns away from bags as  you look over, noticing it’s time to go and scurrying over to him. She watches you both talk quietly and head to wherever you’re going next, trying to ignore the quiet, burning jealousy seeping up into her. It’s nothing new, she reminds herself. She knew you two were best friends when she got together with her Bennyboo, so she knew what she was signing herself up for.

“Are we ready?” She asks curtly, turning towards Jane. She refuses to spend another second worrying about you, and instead, she channels all her energy into sifting through streamer sample colors. Whatever you two are doing can’t be as important as this. She’s sure whatever you’re discussing right now during Ben’s suit fitting is just meaningless small talk. Nothing of any importance. 

“I… truly don’t think you could have picked a better, more impactful first proclamation, Ben.” You conclude with a sip of raspberry tea. A wave of relief washes through him as he pulls on the blue suit jacket for Lumier to tailor. 

“You think so? Because, I-I’m only going to get to do this once, and-” 

He’s cut off by you nodding solemnly. 

“What better way to pave the way to the future than mending rifts of the past?” You ask rhetorically. 

“Yes!” Ben exclaims, letting his hands fall to his sides with a smile, a gesture you mirror. “You get it…” 

“Of course.” You smile at him, and it’s quiet for a moment as you take another sip of your tea. “You know your parents will…” You begin, but Ben is already nodding. 

“Oh yeah.” He agrees. “I wrote down everything from the pros column, and ideas for everything in the cons.” 

“Good,” you say, encouragingly. 

“And I have a great mission statement.” He adds, and you can see him getting fired up. You know how much this means to him, how much of his heart he’s putting into helping as many people as possible and being a good king to everyone, even the citizens on the Isle. If you know Ben - and you’re sure you do by now - you know how he can start to overthink things right before a presentation, even an informal one. He’s as prepared as he’ll ever be, and you have his back. He knows this.

“Oh, I meant to ask,” you say breezily as Lumier enters, “how are things going with Audrey?”  

You wiggle your eyebrows at him, sending him a comically scandalous look. He laughs as you wave hello to Lumier, and you think it’s the first time he’s relaxed in the last 30 hours or so. You flip through your journal, selecting a few pictures you took recently of flora in Wonderland, doodling their leaves and stalks on a mostly blank page. He laughs, hanging his head at the unexpected nature of the question, and Lumier pulls out a tape measure to begin the alterations of Ben’s suit. 

“You’re really- we’re really going to go there?” He asks through a smile. You look up at him, nodding. 

“Mhm.” You confirm. He can’t say no to you, he never can. 

“Okay. Uh, yeah things are good. With me and Audrey.” 

“Good,” you smile, looking up from your paper. He wonders what you’re working on, and always looks forward to seeing your little drawings. Even the ones you dislike, he finds beautiful. He tries to think of what else is going on with Audrey. 

“We, uh… we have a date later this week.” 

“Sleeve.” Lumier interjects, moving Ben’s arm.

“Oh, how fun!” You smile. 

“Head.” Lumier turns Ben to look out the large windows. He thinks for another moment, struggling to find anything else Audrey related to talk about as you distract yourself with the expression of a pouting mushroom you’d gotten a good picture of last time you were in Wonderland. Before he can think of anything else his eyes land on the Isle. His mind wanders toward how forgotten everyone out there must feel. You look up at him, following his gaze. 

“I know.” You say softly. You’ve discussed the Isle and its’ residents at great lengths, both finding a greater deal of compassion for them than most people seem to have. 

“How is it possible that you’re going to be crowned king next month?” Comes King Adam’s booming voice as he and Belle enter from the patio doors. 

“Hello, dear,” Belle smiles at you, resting a hand on your shoulder as they pass, approaching Ben, and you smile a greeting back up at her, and begin putting away your notebook. As close as you two are, you can’t expect anyone but the royal family to be in the room during discussions of Ben’s first proclamation. Both you and Ben knew this had to be a conversation between him and his parents, and as much as you both might like it to be, it’s not really something he can do with you by his side. You scurry past him, sending him an encouraging look. 

“You’ll do great.” You say, your voice just low enough for him to hear it. You touch his arm encouragingly until Lumier shoos you away, not wanting anything to jeopardize the way he finally got Ben’s shoulder to lay on that side. Ben locks eyes with you as you leave. It’s only a moment, but those three words, that one little gesture from you have him more ready than ever. He prepares himself with a breath. 

You’ll probably sneak off to Wonderland for a while, like you usually do with any pockets of spare time you find, so you’ll get to update him on the feud going on between the bluebirds and inchworms by the time he’s done. He takes comfort in that, knowing that even in the worst case scenario, even if everything goes horribly wrong, you’ll still have some fascinating Wonderland stories for him, just like you always do. He finds great comfort in the thought as his parents approach, and knows two things; it’s time for him to begin stepping up, and that you have his back all the way. 

You close the heavy wooden door behind you, walking a few feet down the hall so you don’t accidentally eavesdrop. You sit down against the wall to wait for Ben, and your mind drifts to Wonderland, as it so often does. There’s a peace there, something you’ve never been able to find overland. It calls to you, like a sailor’s heart calls to the sea. You wonder if you have time for a quick trip, just a few minutes in paradise, but you know it’s never really just a few minutes. Time works differently in Wonderland than it does in overland, and it’s unpredictable. The last thing you want is not to be here when Ben is done talking to his parents. 

“I’d better not…” you sigh. Being here for Ben is more important right now. He’s your best friend. So you settle into your little spot in the hallway, smoothing out your blue skirt around you. You reach into your teapot shaped bag, pulling out a small white porcelain teacup with little violets on it, and a matching saucer. You think for a moment about what kind of tea you want right now. Hibiscus, you decide, with a touch of honey. You tilt the spout of your bag, letting the perfectly brewed cup of tea fall from the spout. You take a sip, leafing through your homework to see what you can bore yourself with to pass the time. You don’t know how long Ben will be in there, and you don’t care too much. You’re sure he’ll do wonderfully, and that’s really all you care about right now. 

[dd-is-my-guiltypleasure]

Everyone’s gone UFO crazy. Maybe The X-Files should come back

Chrissy Iley

MARCH 2, 2024

Starring in a poignant new film adapted from his own novel, David Duchovny reveals the heartache of almost losing his daughter... and why his most famous show could yet return

No wonder David Duchovny has written, directed and stars in his latest movie Bucky F***ing Dent... it’s based on his own bestselling 2016 novel of the same name. Poignant and funny, it examines a father-son relationship via baseball, with X-Files star David playing Marty the dad, who’s dying of lung cancer, and Logan Marshall-Green from Spider-Man: Homecoming as his estranged son Ted.

The real Bucky Dent went down in history for scoring an unlikely home run for the New York Yankees in a 1978 tie-breaker against arch rivals the Boston Red Sox, and the film’s title is how generations of Boston fans have referred to him ever since, a metaphor for heartbreak. Set in that same year, the film follows struggling writer Ted as he moves back into his childhood home when he hears his father is dying, prompting a whirlwind of dark revelations from the past. Meanwhile, Boston fan Marty’s health dips whenever his beloved Red Sox lose, so New York fan Ted orchestrates the illusion of a Boston winning streak...

Marty has transferred his feelings for an old flame (the secret love of his life, not his wife) to the Red Sox. ‘The intensity of fandom has always puzzled me,’ says David. ‘It has to be a kind of sublimation. My father and I liked playing baseball; my best childhood memory is playing it with him and enjoying the simple communication you can have through a game, but we didn’t share the fandom thing.

‘Marty’s transposed his feelings for this woman to the Red Sox, and the movie is really about the idea of losing. In America there’s a sick addiction to winning and winners, but most of us have to lose every day. Suffering makes us human - it unites us all.’

There’s a moment in the film when Marty is talking about a chest infection that almost killed Ted as a child. Marty says he begged God or whoever to take his lungs instead and let Ted live. ‘One thing I’ve never told anyone is that when my daughter was nine months old she got really ill,’ reveals David. ‘Her mother [actress Tea Leoni] and I had to face the fact we might lose her and I remember feeling so devastated, I didn’t think I could love anything again if she died.’

His daughter West, now 24, has since become a successful actress who seems to have inherited her mother’s stunning blonde looks and her father’s charisma. ‘I think she has a greater passion for acting than either of her parents ever did,’ he says. They also have a son Kyd, 21, and David says the hardest moment of his life was telling them he and Tea were divorcing ten years ago, as his own parents had done when he was 12. ‘It was far worse telling them than actually experiencing it. When you’re a child you just try to get through it, you don’t feel responsible. As a parent I felt at least 50 per cent responsible.’

Tall and thin with good skin and an easy charm, David seems untouched by the ageing process, although this role is a huge shift from the Lotharios he usually plays, such as bed-hopping writer Hank in comedy-drama series Californication. Does getting older bother him? ‘Of course, and as an actor you have to think of the different roles you’ll be offered. When I was writing this script I was thinking I’d play Ted, the son. We tried to make it four or five years ago and I was still going to play Ted, but then when it came to doing it I realised it just wouldn’t work, so I thought I’d play Marty. And that was exciting because it was very different.’

Californication won two Emmys and a Golden Globe, but was notorious for its portrayal of LA’s seedier side. Does he think it could be made now? ‘Certainly they would insist on intimacy coaches, but I don’t think it would be made now, for the wrong reasons. There was a misunderstanding about what it was about. It was meant to be funny, and it was meant to be about family and love. But what everybody got excited about was not that,’ he says, referring to the furore over the sex scenes. ‘In my mind the show was misperceived.’

Another of David’s roles that would spark a row today was a transgender FBI agent in Twin Peaks in the early 90s, when almost no transgender women were on TV. Again it was groundbreaking. ‘But if you’re playing a murderer no one asks you, “Have you murdered people?”’ he says. ‘It was just being an actor.’

David is, of course, best known for The X-Files, in which he played UFO-obsessed FBI agent Mulder opposite Gillian Anderson’s sceptical Scully. The series finally bowed out in 2018 after 11 series, but could there ever be another? ‘Maybe - it might even be more current now,’ he says, referring to the recent release of top-secret UFO files in the US. ‘I’m not personally interested in UFOs so it doesn’t make it more exciting for me to revisit The X-Files. It was a role I played but I wasn’t passionate about the subject. Maybe I’m the only one who isn’t.’

There was a brouhaha at the time about the huge pay discrepancy between David and Gillian, and I wonder if it would be difficult for him to work with her again. ‘As far as I know, by the end there was no difference at all between us, but Hollywood salaries are very weird,’ he says. ‘I’m going to London soon and I’ll see Gillian because she lives there now. I saw her in the West End doing All About Eve and I enjoyed it. She wished me luck with Bucky too.’

In recent years David has explored his passion for music, releasing a couple of folk-rock albums. So does he see himself as an actor, a director or a musician? ‘All of them, I’m an artist,’ he says. ‘I can filter stuff through a song, a novel, a performance or through directing. There are all kinds of ways of being an artist. I write best about dramatic things. There’s a way to deal with suffering to create art.’

Bucky F***ing Dent, Glasgow Film Festival, Wednesday. Visit glasgowfilm.org

[darcyfangirlsfrequently]

My reactions to episode 7 of season 2 of Criminal Minds Evolution

The only thing I know about this episode is that it's fucked up

Spoilers below the cut!

(TW: loss of a child under the cut)

oh, acid showers. lovely.

oh god the hair melting off the scalp. no WONDER i got warnings for this episode

drowning in acid. Lovely!!!

oh this IS fucked up.

Garvez in the same room! Yay! Crumbs!

Have I mentioned I love JJ and Luke's friendship?

Penelope with all the pretty flowers on her dress!! she looks so good in this scene

Penelope is just straight-up STARING at Luke

TARA WITH THE SLICKED BACK HAIR SHE'S SO GORGEOUS I LOVE HER

Emily reading Tyler to shit over his handwriting? Iconic.

Look I kinda love Tyler. AS HIS OWN SEPARATE CHARACTER AWAY FROM PENELOPE. When he's with literally ANYONE else, he's great.

Tara i see those heart eyes for Emily

"Mr. Sensitive" help i SNORTED

Why is Rossi so against contacting Jill? Forbidding her?

Okay so my theory was correct. The victim at the beginning sexually assaulted the unsub's wife, and this baby is a product of that.

Look Tyler is adorable, okay? When he's interacting with the rest of the team, I love him.

"Just what Garcia told me" I wasn't under the impression that they talked much???? Especially about this kind of stuff.

They're just turning Tyler into their puppy and i'm here for it

Voit's Lawyer! finally!

He's really offering to END his lawyer's ex wife???

ooh that shot through all the car windows is cool

"I just want you to be you" please god tell me she's not saying "clearly you have a way of winning over/seducing older blonde women and i need you to do that"

"I don't wanna be that guy." Yes Tyler!! Growth!!

"just fuckin drive" emily i love you. I also love this friendship dynamic.

JJ: Maybe Penelope can help us find [the connection.] Luke: Penelope! Yes! Let's go see Penelope! I love Penelope! (he loves her it's canon)

LUKE SITTING ON THE DESK LUKE SITTING ON THE DESK

LUKE THE SMIRK??? THE HEART EYES??? oh my GOD

"It's why you and I are finally friends" DAMN FATALITY

"finally" with the smirk I LOVE THEM SO MUCH HOLY FUCK

I just know JJ is sitting there like "are y'all gonna stop flirting for two seconds"

THEIR SMILES OH MY GOD THEY'RE JUST SO THRILLED TO BE AROUND EACH OTHER THEY'RE SO IN LOVE.

"thanks frieeend" I LOVE THEM BY THAT DELIVERY WAS SO FUNNY. Also he touched her arm/back

The way they're calling each other "friend" is literally so flirty.

PLEASE tell me someone has done a gifset comparing "we thrive as frenemies" to "it's why you and I are finally friends."

Also the way that means she literally just called him TREASURE????

I just know that as Luke was saying "thanks frieeeend" he was thinking "thanks, friend, i love youuu"

THIRD HOTCH MENTION OF THE SEASON GODDAMN

Hotch, Morgan, and Reid all in the SAME SCENE damn

I love Jill already

Ooh, fiancé not fiancée

"I loved Jason" "He loved you back" I'M IN SHAMBLES ACTUALLY

Emily did you just say that David Rossi ISN'T dramatic???

Tyler and i are JUST as fucking confused

"The next generation of the BAU" really reminds me of how much younger than all of them he is which just makes me feel icky about Greencia all over again

Luke leading the profile delivery! Getting his moment! We love to see it!

Oh shit the doctor is spilling ALL the tea

I wonder if the baby is dead, a delusion

This is dark.

Wait, are the baby AND the mother dead??? Oh that would make sense for why the guy puked when he saw her. It was a skeleton

this really is a luke heavy ep and i am here for it

oh god yeah that's... fucked.

They need to start putting some god damn trigger warnings on this show

Luke looks genuinely SAD for this man.

They can give Voit a corded phone? this feels like a risk of some sort

A kill kit??? we didn't leave that behind last season??

"Do not, for any reason, open it." and ofc he opens it right away

JILL AND PENELOPE HUG MY HEARTTTT

Tara and Tyler friendship!

Oh Jilllll. I wanna hug her.

That scene with Jill walking around touching everything... oh my heart. Aisha Tyler you ate with that.

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

Doctor Who, but Chronologically 26

It's 1913 and fuck me but this episode fucks like a rabid rhino as it's time for Human Nature.

Holy.

Shit.

And it kind of makes sense! Remember when the Tennant Doctor talked to Jackson Lake? And told him about how Time Lords sometimes store memories in fob watches? And then remember how Tecteun and the Ood had a fob watch they used to be a dick to the Whittaker Doctor? And she was maybe going to open it? Fob watch! We know all about these!!!

So, we start with Tennant and Martha, sprinting into the TARDIS to escape "The Family". These, it transpires, are aliens made of lurid green gas who can possess people, so we're off to a simply fantastic start right there in terms of saving the budget. To escape them the Doctor turns himself human, and gets Martha to basically guard him in The Past because as a human he remembers nothing, which

A) means we are treated to David Tennant's acting changing to being Subtly Wrong, right down to the way he smiles, which is unsettling as fuck; and

B) fucking sucks ASS for Martha because she's now a black maid in a posh white English boarding school and this episode is not interested in portraying posh white English boarding schoolers in 1913 as anything other than raging cock-heads who make you glad there's a world war around the corner to wipe two thirds of them out.

Although I say English. That's St Ffagans, that is. With some exteriors up by Llangors. I know my Welsh historical sites.

Anyway, Martha yeets herself bodily up the rankings with this one. She's capable, and clever, and marooned in a fucking awful time as a bodyguard for a man who doesn't remember her and treats her like shit, and she is so achingly alone. She's stored the TARDIS in a shed, and she goes to it for some normalcy, and to dream of going home. She's made friends with Jenny, another maid, and their friendship is sweet and wholesome, the only bright spot left, and the whole thing would make you weep if only, um, Freema's acting was good.

(I'm sorry I adore her but she is just... very hammy)

So it's very depressing when Jenny becomes an alien host.

BUT it's also an AMAZING SCENE, because Martha has managed to source some afternoon tea for them to share, and Jenny comes in and is Weird, and Martha doesn't just notice - in a move that had me going "Well THIS scene was written by a Welshman," she looks Jenny in the eye and says "Okay, shall I put some gravy in the teapot? We could have jam and herring." And Jenny falls for it just as a changeling would, and Martha gets the fuck out. Incredible. Martha for the win. Everyone should know their changeling lore. Martha clearly does. Good girl.

Although shout out to the Family actually; the Daughter is a little girl with a red balloon and the same nursery rhyme backing track as the sinister little girl with the red balloon in Remembrance of the Daleks who turned out to be possessed by a Dalek or some shit, which is very cool, although these little girls with red balloons and sinister nursery rhyme backing tracks are about as good at acting as each other, which is to say, not really. BUT the Son is played by what's his tits off of Game of Thrones, you know the one? Played the little blond inbred lad who loved dragons. He's fantastic in this! Plays it with just the right amount of menace and charm, it's great. It could easily have become hammy and undermined it, but it's just great. Who knew you could sniff in a frightening manner and make your eyes glow with the Power of Acting alone?

Um, what else, what else... oh yeah, the Doctor as a human is a trembling virgin who gets a girlfriend played by Jessica Hynes. He falls down some stairs because he's so flustered about asking her to a dance. He literally starts saying "Um, I've never..." before kissing her, as though that's at all news to anyone watching.

Anyway, plot-wise, the Doctor dreams of his real life and has written it all down in a dream journal, which he insists on explaining to every woman who looks his way with the tediousness of people who keep dream journals everywhere. He keeps the fob watch on the mantlepiece. He has left a list of instructions for Martha, of which number 23 is to open the watch as a last resort.

But, one of the students in the boarding school is that kid from Love, Actually who later was an American chess player in the Queen's Gambit (side note, I swear like half the cast in the Queen's Gambit was British and putting on lacklustre American accents). Turns out this kid is Mildly Psychic in the way that people often are in RTD's era because why the fuck not, and so he has, in fact, stolen the fob watch because it spoke to him. Occasionally he opens it and learns about Time Lords, but that means the Family can smell the Doctor. This means Martha tries to open the watch, only to find it missing.

So they all go to the dance, which is in the old Oakdale Working Men's Club, and my dad used to go drinking there. It's in St Ffagans now. They're moving the Vulcan there just next door which is fun, because I used to go drinking in the Vulcan, so it'll be two generations of us moved to a museum. I've forgotten what I was talking about.

So they all go to the dance. Unfortunately, this includes the Family, who are armed with a heady mix of alien guns and extraneous scarecrows. In a cliffhanger that lets down the rest of the episode, they grab Martha and Jessica Hynes, and tell a very confused Doctor that he has to change back from human or pick which of these women to kill. It feels a bit needlessly stapled on, tbh. But it's nice to see Oakdale Workies again.

Anyway I think no new questions? Other than "How will they get out of this?" but the second half is next even on this batshit watch order, so we can ignore that one. That's fun. However we do still have a fob watch hanging plot thread for Whitaker, so there's that.

The list!

“She” (an unknown person) is returning (perhaps River returned as Missy. Maybe Me? Maybe Clara???!)

There is something on Donna’s back

An entire planet, Pyrovilia, just… disappeared, somehow. (Maybe because the TARDIS is exploding??? Saturnine was also lost, and that WAS because of the TARDIS exploding. The lion man’s planet was also lost but he was a bit of a knob about it if I’m honest.)

Amy is maybe dead (she’s not)

The Doctor has been cubed (he’s out, but how?)

River is possibly blown up  (unless she’s Missy)

The TARDIS has blown up  (It’s fine now. Except it’s sort of melting now because it’s corrupted, but it’s fine again)

The universe appears to have ended  (the universe is back again)

The Doctor has employed(?) Nardole (And Nardole was “reassembled???”)

There’s a vault in the TARDIS and it contains Missy but we don’t know why (sometimes she knocks for the bants)

What has happened to all these companions and where are the new ones coming from?

There’s an immortal Viking girl now. Her name is Me and she’s now looking after the people the Doctor abandons

What’s With The Silence?

Why was Rory entirely unconcerned by the entire world suddenly going silent when that is Not Normal and should have been, at the very least, extremely disconcerting?

What did the Doctor do to Queen Lizzie One?

Who is Captain Jack Harkness? (Is he the one who gave the companions a warning about the lone cyberman?)

Why is Amy seeing a one-eyed woman in a vanishing window?

What’s with the Doctor’s future involving getting shot by an astronaut?

Is Amy pregnant and why is it inconclusive?

Who is Sarah-Jane Smith?

How is the Doctor Bill’s teacher and why/where does he have an office?

What is going on with the Cyber War and the Cyberium???

Who did the Doctor lose to Cyber Conversion?

What happened with the Other Cyber War?

What happened with the Third War that deleted the void?

Why does Rose seem particularly important?

What’s with the Weeping Angel statues, and why can’t you blink at them?

What order do these Doctors go in? (Eccleston, Tennant, uncertain, Smith, Capaldi.)

Which companion just… forgot the Doctor, and how?

Yaz and Vinder are about to die as Mori/Mwri/Muuri

There is a Lupari shield around Earth.

What’s a Time War?

What’s the Rift?

What’s Bad Wolf?

What happened with Amy’s pregnancy?

In which war did the Doctor become a war criminal, and how?

Who is the Master?

Why has Amy forgotten Rory?

Is Rory plastic or not?

Why is the Doctor sulking on a cloud?

How exactly does the Doctor have a cloud?

What exactly happened with Strax to, uh, tame him?

Which friend killed Strax?

Which friend brought Strax back?

Where did this lesbian lizard and human couple come from?

What happened with Clara as Souffle Girl and the Daleks?

How does Clara actually join?

Why so many Claras?

Why is Missy apparently in robo-heaven?

Why is probably!Missy pushing Clara and the Doctor together?

What is Trensilor and what happened there?

Who is Handles?

The Doctor is about to be dissolved by a beautiful geode man

The universe is being crushed by the Flux

Will the Doctor open the fob watch? (NEW INFO: he also needs to open a fob watch as Tennant, but this presumably won't count.)

Sontarans are invading Earth again

Who is Kate?

Who is Osgood? Another name of Clara’s again?

The fuck is the deal with the Grand Serpent

[blueberrypancakesworld]

Hey there @blueberrypancakesworld I got a request for you! It’s about the boys and Michael mainly David and Michael having a fight and being very loud which Lucy overheard this and is 100% done with it so she pulls a shotgun and shoots it to the sky above them, tells Michael and David to come over to her and then grabs their ears and twisted them and in a very calm tone of voice she threatens them to stop fighting and saids that “if I wanted to shoot you two I would have done so!” And walk away from them leaving Paul and Marko hugging each other out of fear, Dwayne being in shock realizing that she was very serious about shooting them and David and Michael agreeing to never fight never again! 

Silent evening

warning : use of a gun, implied use of weed and alcohol

info : So after months (sorry for the wait) the cute idea is finally finished and Lucy is just a power woman. I hope you like it and have fun reading :)

masterlist

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Loud noises could be heard in the house of the family who not only had to share it as humans but also with the vampires who had taken up residence in the dark attic to be closer to their new friends, family and loved ones.

But it was in this very house that a scene of loud noise was playing out, threatening to jolt Grandfather out of his sleep, which for once had not been led here by Grass and Whsikey.

A fact that reassured his daughter Lucy, who merely placed her hand lightly on her old father's upper body and looked outside with a warning glance.

The sun had already set and she knew that the boys wanted to go out to the beach with Michael without the motorcycles flying, but her son wanted to take the safe route so as not to attract any more attention from outside.

The police already had enough to do with the kids turning up on the beach, so they didn't need another reason. But when she heard the shouting from outside again, the mother of the two boys had had enough.

She told her youngest to go to bed with Star and Laddie, trusting that the two of them would pass the time with him easily. She had taken them both into her heart, a daughter she didn't have and a shy but very loving little boy.

But at some point, she had reached her limits and she stroked her father's head once more before she went to the wall and took the doorbell from the wall to open the door as quietly as possible in contrast to the loud shouting and went into the garden. She saw exactly how Dwayne stood leaning against a tree watching the whole thing.

Marko and Paul held on to each other so as not to fall over with laughter, imitating their two friends over and over again, while David flew around willy-nilly and had one or two bitten cigarettes lying on the floor with rage.

Her son Michael, on the other hand, looked as if he would explode and strike any second. But the screaming and shouting only got louder and Lucy had had enough. Grasping the trigger of the gun, she aimed it over their heads and pulled the trigger.

A shot that was loud, louder than the screaming and a shot that made everyone outside flinch on this early evening. ,,Come here," she said sharply and gave her son and his friend a warning look. Michael almost ran to her while David threw away his cigarette again and landed in front of her.

They both looked like two little boys who had broken a vase again, but they had to. Letting them wait a moment, she grabbed one of their ears and twisted and pulled it, hearing the sounds of pain before pulling them closer.

,,If I wanted to shoot you two I would have done so!" she shouted louder than either of them ever could before leaving her charges in the garden, knowing that she first needed a soothing cup of tea and an even more soothing book with Max on the sofa.

Dwayne had hidden behind the tree, Marko and Paul had stopped laughing as they clung to each other. ,,Shall we… well, just stay here and play a game?" Michael asked the group and he had never heard such a quick ,,Yes" before the group of boys went into the room and spent the night playing Ludo and Uno. A quiet night in which Lucy finally had her rest and Grandpa could sleep peacefully.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[orange-juicee]

Nick x Charlie

Together forever

"YOU'RE HOME!"

Nick pov

-Saturday-

It's finally summer and me and a few friends from uni were all packed into my small car headed to Kent because we wanted to hang out this summer and I was gonna surprise Charlie and the gang, but first I wanted to go see my mum and Nellie so that's where we were headed mums already met all of my uni friends so when I asked if it was ok if they came down with me she didn't have a problem with it.

-An hour later-

We were about an hour away from my house now and they were screaming Taylor swift songs in my ear while I was driving but I'm used to it by now so it doesn't really bother me. Charlie and then really got me hooked on to Taylor swift so I know most of the songs and can sing them by heart.

"Niiiiick sing with usss!" My roommate Violette said in a sing song voice "Not right now Vi, I'm driving" I said and she started pouting "Pleeeaaseeee Nick?" She says giving me puppy dog eyes little does she know only Charlie's and Oliver's puppy eyes work on me. "No Vi maybe when we get to my house we can invite Charlie and he can sing songs with you instead?" Her eyes lit up like Christmas and she excitedly nodded her head while the rest of them agreed.

-20 minutes later-

We finally arrived at my mums house and Vernon and Alanna are in the back sleep so Violette and René are waking them up. I knocked on my mums door and she comes out to give us all a big hug and invited us inside so that we could get settled in. Since David moved out we now have three rooms open my room, David's old room, and the guest bedroom so I let them choose between the guest and David's and who's sleeping where because me and Charlie are gonna share my room.

Speaking of Charlie he doesn't know that we are here so I asked mom to call him and invite him over like she needs help with something and then we are gonna surprise him. While she's calling him I'm gonna hide my car a little down the street so he doesn't see it and the surprise gets ruined.

After I hide my car me and the others go and hide in my room. I told mum to pretend like she needed help looking for something in my room and then we were gonna jump out and surprise him. He's probably gonna have a heart attack and kill me after this but it's worth it.

We were upstairs waiting and then we hear Nellie start barking so that must mean he's here I hear mum open the front door and invite him in. Now she's leading him up the stairs so we turn the light off and get in positions. 3..2..1! "SURPRISE!" We all yell at the same time and both Charlie and mum jump in shock mum jumps cause she didn't expect us to be that loud and Charlie jumps in pure shock he stands there in shock for a moment before a huge grin takes over his face and he runs and jumps into my arms kissing me like there's no tomorrow.

"Hey baby I missed you" I say and Charlie starts crying happily kissing all over my face. "OMG! Nick I missed you so much you don't know how much I love you!" Charlie says in between kisses. "Awwwwww" we hear come from behind us in a teasing tone, I almost forgot that the others were here also " shut up, guys" I say flustered that we had just kissed so much in front of other people.

"Omg hi guys! I'm so glad your here too!" Charlie says as he runs to give each one of them a hug they reciprocated the hugs and 5 minutes later we were back downstairs again getting our things out the car while Charlie and my mum were in the living room watching tv.

When we walk back in I see mum sitting alone on the couch so I ask her where Charlie is and she points to the kitchen. I walk in the kitchen and find Charlie fixing himself a cup of tea. "Hey baby I was looking for you" I said and Charlie looks up from his tea "yeah I just went to get some tea, do you want some?" He asked "sure" I say with a smile and he smiles back. After he made my tea Vi comes running in the kitchen excitedly "Charlie! Do you wanna sing songs with me and René!" She says bouncing from excitement "Sure!" Charlie says just as excited.

When he first came up to uní to visit he, Violette, and René all got along really well and basically became best friends—don't tell Tao that he'll freak out— and anytime he visited they would always hang out together, but now that we came down for the summer maybe the gang and them could become friends like Charlie and the others have.

After Charlie Violette and René finish singing their songs we all decide to head into our rooms for the night, as it started getting dark outside.

-The next morning-

The next morning Charlie ask the gang if they want to meet him at the milkshake bar to hangout, little do they know that me and the others are here so we're gonna surprise them. I really want my uni friends and the my at home friends to get to know each other because I hang out with both of them a lot. Tara and Elle are already here and they are expecting me to come two days from now but little do they know I'm here now.

As we arrive closer at the milkshake bar Carlie sees Taos beanie and so he tells us to follow after him just where they can't see us. We were trailing behind Charlie for a few minutes before he tells us to hide behind a tree and then we he says he has a surprise to some out and surprise the gang.

3..2..1!! "SURPRISE!" We jump out yelling for the second time today. The gang pauses and looks at us in shock "Nick!" Tara and Darcy yell excitedly jumping up and running to hug me " Hey Guys!" I say just as excited besides Vi and René Tara and Darcy are my best friends girl wise cause Charlie's my best friend.

Anyways the rest of the gang all come over and hug me including Issac and Tao—I was pleasantly surprised when Tao hugged me— after a group hug Darcy asks "when did you get here?" " Last night" I reply "then why didn't you come say hi to me and Tara?" Darcy ask's acting offended before I can respond Charlie cuts me off and says "He wanted to see his mum and Nellie first, he also surprised me but he said that he didn't wanna see y'all right away cause he wanted it to be a surprise!"

Charlie says cheerfully chuckling a little I say "That and the fact that I brought some of my uni friends down with me I wanted them to get settled in first before y'all met" They look behind me and pause "Hi! I've heard so much about you guys, I'm Violette Nick's best gal pal!" Tara and Darcy look at me offendedly before I say "Don't worry Tara and Darcy y'all are still some of my best friends also" I say with a slight smile.

A look of relief flashes across their faces and they start introducing themselves. A few minutes later we all decided it was best to sit and have some milkshakes. I got bubblegum, Charlie got chocolate, Tara and Darcy got banana, Elle and Tao are sharing a strawberry one, Issac has plain vanilla, and René has a pineapple one— I didn't even know they sold that one— Vi, has the same as me and the rest didn't want milkshakes.

- time skip -

We all finished our milkshakes and headed to my house so that we could have a sleepover because Mum said she didn't mind. Once we reach my place we hear Nellie barking excitedly because she can smell all of these new people.

When we get inside we were all bombarded by Nellie giving us sopping wet kisses. We eventually got her off and all went upstairs to my room so that we could play some games.

"What games should we play guys?" Charlie asked "Truth or dare!" Darcy shouts "21 Questions!" Vi shouts "ok, how about both?" Charlie asks "ok!" They both shout.

- 10 minutes later -

" Nick!, Truth or dare?" Vi asks excited "uhmmm...dare...?" I say hesitantly she gets a mischievous look on her face and says " I dare you to...."

TBC....

———————————————————————

HEY GUYS, IM TRYING OUT A NEW WRITING STYLE AND WANTED TO KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS THOUGHT ABOUT IT ALSO LMK ON HOW YOU LIKE THIS AND WHAT SHOULD THE DARE BE. CRITISM  IS WELCOME ESPECIALLY IF IT'LL HELP ME GET BETTER AT WRITING BECAUSE I REALLY LIKE SHARING MY IDEAS WITH YOU GUYS!

BYE LOVES!

-eclipwze-m1

[canirove]

The Princess & the Football Player | Chapter 34

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"Wow, Ellie. Your face looks so red... Did I catch you shagging Declan?"

"Shagging?" I laugh.

"Yes, shagging. You know what it means, right?"

"I do, Sophie."

"And?"

"And what."

"Did I interrupt anything?"

"No, you didn't."

"Yet!" Declan says as he walks into the bathroom. 

"Ignore him" I reply, rolling my eyes. 

"Then why are you so red?" Sophie asks.

"I joined him and the boys at the gym and then when they were done training we played a little football game."

"Wait, they know?"

"Yep, he told them yesterday. I was starting to bore myself to death because I couldn't leave the apartment or do anything when they were here."

"And how did they react?"

"The new players freaked out a bit, they didn't know what to do or what to say."

"The usual around you, then" Sophie chuckles.

"Yeah... But the ones who were already playing for West Ham when Dec and I were together, were really happy to see me again."

"Because they also know you are meant to be" she smiles. "Have you talked about when you are coming back home? How long do you plan on living there?"

"I don't know. We've decided to spend the new year with Mason and Roberta because I haven't seen her in ages, but nothing else."

"I'm sure she'll love that. But then you could come over. Both of you. We all miss you, and you owe mum, dad and grandmama a chat."

"I know I do" I sigh. "Them, and Charles too. Do you know anything about him? David told me he left for Monaco."

"No, nothing. But he looked so gutted that night… Ellie, he loves you."

"I know he does. But I couldn't keep lying to him or myself. You know it better than anyone."

"I do, yes" Sophie sighs. "Anyway, I better go. Our beloved cousins have invited me to have tea with them and share gossip."

"Enjoy" I chuckle.

"Yeah, enjoy" she says, rolling her eyes. "Once we hang up you'll leave to go shag Declan, while I'll have to listen to Eugene talk for hours about her dog having problems going to the bathroom or how she's fallen in love with a new guy she's met twice."

"You'll be fine, Sophie. You can do it."

"I can, but I don't want to" she complains. "So you better enjoy your shagging, make one of us happy."

"Sophie, we aren't..." 

"Bye, sis. Love you!" she says with a big grin before hanging up.

"So... Are we shagging or not?" Declan says behind me.

"Jesus Christ, you scared me."

"Sorry. But are we shagging or not?"

"Can you all please stop saying that... word" I say as a turn around to look at him. He's leaning on the bathroom's door only wearing his boxers, his hair a perfect mess after training, his arms crossed over his chest and making his biceps pop. And all that while giving me that smile that he knows makes my insides melt. "We are shagging. We definitely are. But one thing" I say as I get up from the sofa. "Please stop using the word shagging."

"I promise, your Royal Highness" he smirks before lifting me in the air and throwing me over his shoulder, walking towards our room while I giggle like an idiot.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"I'm so glad you could come, bro" Mason says, hugging Declan. "It must have been crazy these past days."

"It has, yeah. And it still is" he sighs.

"How long are you gonna be staying at Rush Green?" Roberta asks him. 

"I'm not sure. Eleanor has an event in a couple of weeks and they are planning on letting the press ask her questions so she can explain everything and stop all the bullshit, but she also wants to talk to Charles first."

"I wish she had come. I miss her so much..."

As Roberta says those words, someone rings the bell at Mason's house. 

"I'll get that" he says.

"Is anyone else joining us?" Declan asks.

"I don't think so. Mason asked around and everyone is either staying with their families or going to a party."

"Who could it be, then?"

"I... Eleanor!" Roberta yells, running towards her friend and hugging her.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Eleanor!" Roberta yells, running to hug me. "Oh, Ellie, I've missed you so much!"

"I've missed you too" I say, hugging her back. 

"Aren't they cute?" Mason smiles.

"Very" Declan replies.

"But what are you doing here?" Roberta asks. "Declan said you were staying with your family!"

"That was a little lie, we wanted to surprise you" I say, breaking our embrace. "Oh, shit. I think my hair has got tangled on something."

"Let me... There."

"What are you wearing on that hand?" I ask while scratching my head. "That actually hurt."

"Oh... I just... Umm... We got engaged!" she yells again, showing me the huge diamond on her hand.

"You what?" Declan and I say at the same time.

"Surprise!" Mason says with a shy smile.

"When did that happen?" I ask.

"And why didn't you tell me? I'm your best friend, Mase!" Declan says.

"I know, I know. We just wanted to keep it to ourselves for a while, you know? And since you had enough on your plate already with what happened over Christmas..." he shrugs.

"But you could have told me you were planning on doing it! Ask me for advice when you went to buy the ring, about how to do it… I don't know!"

"I'm sorry, Dec. Please don't get mad."

"I'm not mad, I'm just... You are engaged!" Declan says, hugging his friend.

"I'm so happy for you, guys. But now I want all the details" I tell Roberta.

"Why don't we tell you everything while we have dinner? I don't want the risotto to get cold" she says, linking her arm with mine and starting to walk towards the kitchen. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Three, two, one... Happy new year!" we all scream, fireworks being heard all around us, the sky full of different shapes and colours. 

"I love you, future husband" Roberta says to Mason.

"I love you too, future wife" he replies before kissing her.

"Can I get a new year kiss too?" I ask Declan.

"Just one?" he says with a cheeky smile.

"I mean, making out with you to start the new year sounds perfect" I say, wrapping my arms around his neck. "And it is a bit cold here in the garden, it will definitely help me warm up. But doing it in front of Roberta and Mason..."

"They are too busy with each other, they won't care."

"Yeah, they won't" I chuckle.

"Making out session to start the year, then?" he says, gently brushing his nose against mine. 

"Making out session to start the year" I giggle. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"Are you guys naked?" Roberta asks after knocking on the door.

"What?" I mumble. 

"What time is it?" Declan yawns.

"Guys, I need an answer. Are you naked or not?"

"Yes, but you can't see anything."

"Oh, great" Roberta says, storming into the room. "Because I don't want to see your dick first thing in the morning, Declan. That's not how you start the new year."

"That's how I've started the new year" I smirk.

"And you definitely enjoyed it. Have you always been that loud?"

"I… guess? But maybe you heard us because you aren't loud enough anymore. The boring married life has started" I tease her.

"Whatever" she says, rolling her eyes. "Breakfast is ready, so if you want to join us, you know where to find us."

"Thank you, Roberta" Declan says.

"And happy new year!" I laugh, lifting the duvet on his side and leaving him stark naked in front of her.

"Oh my God!" she screams before running away.

"Eleanor Victoria Alexandra!" 

"Yes?" I say, giving Declan my most innocent smile.

"I'm gonna have to do something with you. That behaviour isn't appropriate for the future Queen of England."

"Something like what?" 

"Remember that time you tied my hands with my belt?"

"I do. It is a very fond memory" I smirk.

"Well, it's time I get my revenge" he says, leaving the bed.

"It's been years, Declan! Time to move on!" I laugh. "What are you doing in the bathroom?"

"I needed this" he says, showing me the bathrobe's belt.

"And what are you going to do with that?" I ask, biting my lip in anticipation.

"Lay down. Hands over your head."

"Yes, sir." 

"That's perfect" he says after tying my wrists together. "Are you comfortable there or is it too tight?"

"I'm good."

"Great. Now open your legs. Wide" he orders me again.

"And now?"

"Now I'm gonna eat you out, and then fuck you until neither of us can't keep going. And you can't put your hands down. If you do, I'll stop or go so slow you'll start begging."

"That won't happen" I smirk.

"We shall see" Declan replies with a similar smile before disappearing between my legs.

[filet-o-feelings]

7. To shut them up -- David & Patrick please :)

I'm so sorry this has taken me 6 weeks to write! My brain has not been cooperative at all, lately, but thanks so much for the prompt, anon! I hope this is okay, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it but it got me out of my head about Library Boy for a bit and I'm happy to have written some words today!

Patrick glances past the customer he’s ringing up and watches as David continues to pace back and forth across the store. He’s wishing they were busier today, not even for the business (which is always welcome) but simply to keep David occupied.

He’s been at it all morning - what’s left of morning after he strolled in at 10:00 with a coffee and a tea for Patrick, and a bag of pastries he’s been stress eating between laps.

When the store is empty of customers, he mumbles his anxieties, and sometimes the mumbles turn into full volume rants directed at nobody or Patrick, he’s not sure.

“David,” Patrick starts as the door closes behind the latest customer, “it’s going to be fine. This is not doing you any good.”

“What else am I supposed to do then?” David shouts, and Patrick frowns. He never takes David’s shouting personally; it’s just how his anxiety manifests. Patrick counters with a calm tone, stepping out from behind the counter.

“We’re going to run out of body milk before the next shipment is ready, and Alexis hasn’t been answering my calls or texts all day and who knows what trouble she’s getting up to in New York and I can’t afford to save her like I used to and the house needs so much work and it’s just never going to end,” David continues, summing up the biggest of his worries in one frantic breath.

“Hey, if we run out of body milk that means it’s selling well, and that’s a good thing. We’ll order extra next month, it’s not the end of the world. Alexis can take care of herself, you know that. She’s grown up a lot since you had to rescue her, and from what you’ve both told me, she could handle herself just fine back then, too.”

“Okay, maybe you’re right, but the house-”

“The house will be fine, David. This is home ownership. We own a house! A house where I get to spend all of my free time with you, creating a life together. A house where I get to take care of you, love you. We have a solid roof over our heads and a comfy couch we can curl up together on while we watch the game tonight.”

“Game? What game? Patrick, I’m freaking out here and you want to watch the baseball?”

“I do, I do want to watch the baseball, because there’s nothing we can do about the things you’re freaking out about right now. They’ll work out. We’ll talk to Ronnie about helping out with some of the house stuff. Alexis will answer you when she can, she’s probably out doing amazing things that will make you proud.”

“I don’t know, Patrick, I don’t know what to do!” David throws his hands in the air and starts pacing again, mumbling some more. Patrick sighs before stepping forward to follow him. When David reaches the wall and turns around, Patrick is there to catch him.

“Hey, David, sweetheart,” he says, placing a hand on David’s arm.

David opens his mouth, eyes wild with anxiety, ready to spout off another list of things out of his control, to which Patrick rolls his eyes, grabs David’s shoulders and pulls him in, stopping the words in their tracks. He swears he can feel David’s anxiety melt away under his touch. He’s kissed his husband a thousand times, but he’ll never tire of the feel of David’s lips on his. He’d be lying if he said he only kissed David now to stop him from spiraling any further; it does the trick, sure, but it grounds Patrick just as much.

And for a moment, they both forget about inventory, and a sister who’s too busy to answer her phone, and an old house in need of repairs. They also forget that they’re store owners, in the middle of their store, during business hours, making out in front of the floor to ceiling windows in full view of the town.

When the bell signals someone entering the store, they’re both relieved and irritated when it turns out to be Stevie.

also on AO3

[idioticsky]

So this new ROTTMNT OC... Tell me more about her!!!!

What do each of the boys + April and Splints think of the lil addition? Who does she seem to favor or lean toward more? Does she have or get any Ninpo? I'm assuming she's welcomed as a Hamato to do so? HER IN THE FUTURE?????

... And what would her and Tams interacting be like you think? 👀

*cue evil laughter* which one? I have like 2 now, both of them you know but I just have never introduced to this blog-

But I assume you're talking about Danny, so let me give a little picrew and backstory (I'll find the picrew link to the first one at some point but I wanna share this first, also link to the second one)

This little bitch right here is Danny, a trans fem witch, let me explain her-

I made Danny like a year ago then forgot about her until I started up a rp with Cherry and I've been using her for more things ever since.

Danielle (used to be called David) Gray was born 300 years ago in Italy. You might be questioning how she can live so long, we will get to it. She was then known as one of her parents two children, their sons. She was told and forced to be practically perfect because they had an image to uphold and would not let a child ruin it. Sooner or later, her older brother, Lucas Gray, ran away when she was 100, leaving her alone until she also found her escape around 50-100 years later. She had somehow found her way to the hidden cities and found a way to the one in New York.

There she changes her name, her face, everything about her that she wanted. Danny then made her way to the surface after staying in the hidden city for a long while, making friends with her roommates, Aqua, Nora and Selene. She then meets Tamsin, who she met before when she was first adjusting to New York, a friend. They reconnect and Tamsin would probably introduce her to April.

The way she meets the turtles is a bit different tho. You see, her and her roommates like to have tea days like every Friday and she wanted to get yet another tea set for the house. Need less to say, Leo ends up crashing throw the window of the little tea shop and landing in front of Danny. Instead of being horrified like any normal human, Danny is just really curious about them, she wants to know more about these turtle mutants. I think the boys would be confused by this, but after a while accept her as a new friend. She'd get along well with Splinter and April, with her being calm one on one, but still chaos with others. Danny would soon get closer with the boys and ends up hanging around Leo and Donnie the most, Donnie cuz chaos and Leo cuz she loves to annoy him. She ends up getting closer with Leo and even ends up dating him tho.

As for if she has Ninpo: yes, she has her magic so she never really uses it. She doesn't even really realize she has it until it just kinda shows up during a fight. Her Ninpo is kinda a transportation tool, it's really just like inhuman speed (because of this I think Leo gives her the nickname Zips lmao).

And for her in the future, this part goes two ways.

● Bad timeline: Danny would end up fighting on the front lines, but only for a little while. She has this thing where if she experiences too much stress or overwhelming emotions, she just has this ringing in her ears that can last years, because of the high amounts of stress in the resistance and everything, she becomes mostly deaf. She can still technically hear, but not well enough to understand people without them having to sign out what they mean to her. Her and Leo do get unofficially married during this time tho, even having two kids: Naomi and Michael (if people want I'll make a follow-up post about them and everything). She doesn't make it to the end of the apocalypse tho, she dies during a Krang attack on one of the resistance bases. The entire place blew up basically.

● Good timeline: Danny and Leo would get closer after stopping the Krang invasion. They would get married later on with a over-the-top wedding and everything. They still do have Naomi and Michael, but also another daughter named Suzu (once again, I'll make a follow-up about their kids if y'all wanna see). That timeline I haven't really though too much about tho.

Also her and Tams interactions are so funny in my head it's just like-

Danny: ya think I could fit 20 marshmallows in my mouth?

Tams: ... you're an idiot- and a coward, do 30

And about how she lives so long. Her magic keeps her alive. You see, magic in my head is basically like a life force for some, it can extend someone's life to an extent, but either how much magic Danny has in her body from connecting with her ancestors and members of her family, she's basically immortality from natural causes. Magic is kinda like blood tho, if you lose enough if it, you're gonna die, so too much spell casting or bleeding out since it it literally connected to your blood in a way, you're dead. Explaining how she can die in the bad timeline.

They're so silly I love them-

[riddickkkk]

Fans of Vin Diesel’s best-loved character Riddick have been waiting nine years for the promised sequel to 2004’s Chronicles of Riddick and its predecessor Pitch Black (to say nothing of the top-notch video game installments). We’ve perked up at any offhand mention of a new movie in interviews and taken heart in teasing messages posted by Diesel himself on his personal fanpage. Now, at last, Riddick is back in a new adventure that is more of a series reboot than a proper continuation of the intergalactic convict’s story.

Stripped down literally and figuratively, Vin Diesel and director David Twohy deliver one of the stranger examinations of machismo dressed in sci-fi trappings in recent memory. After waiting so long, so patiently, I had a lot of feelings watching Riddick. There’s some good, some disappointing, and some frankly really, really disturbing.

Spoilers after the cut.

“Don’t know how many times I’ve been crossed off the list and left for dead,” Riddick intones in the movie’s opening. This has been happening to him since his birth, when he was abandoned in a trashcan on his homeworld Furya. After unwittingly backing into the throne as Lord Marshal of the creepy supernatural army of Necromongers, the lone wolf found he didn’t like wearing a crown. Still searching for Furya, Riddick was duped into being dropped off on a new barren planet filled with hostile beasts with only his cunning to help him survive.

A brief flashback—with bonus R-rated naked babes—to Riddick’s crushing melancholy is all we get of his recent past. Riddick is, after all, a rebirth of the franchise. It’s not meant to move Riddick’s journey forward in much of a meaningful way and on that note, Riddick delivers on its promises. This is a self-contained side story.

On first watching, I thought the beginning half of Riddick was really oddly paced. Even a bit slow. It’s Jeremiah Riddick, as, totally alone and broken, Riddick dedicates himself to getting back to his primal roots among the ravenous space-hyenas and mud-dwelling space-scorpions. He fashions crude weapons, hardens himself against venom, and even briefly goes naked. He makes friends with nature, in the form of an adorable hyena pup that he raises and trains to be his sole ally.

But there can’t be a birth without blood and when desperation forces him to activate a beacon as a lure for bounty hunters and their much-needed spaceships, there’s blood and action aplenty. Riddick is the man that can kill you with a tea cup, after all.

Yet, I think I enjoyed solo Riddick more than Riddick playing another game of cat-and-mouse against two really ugly groups of mercenaries. One group is lead by creepy pervert Santana. The only standout among his crew is a pretty charismatic Dave Bautista. I’m told wrestlers are good with charisma. See: Duane “The Rock” Johnson. The other group is more organized and led by Boss Johns (screenwriter and author Matt Nable). If that surname rings a bell to a longtime Riddick fan, well, it’s no surprise there. His second-in-command is beloved badass female actress Katee Sackoff.

Katee Sackoff Riddick Dahl

It’s Sackoff’s character Dahl (pronounced like “Doll”) that really made me super uncomfortable. Women are barely featured in Riddick, unlike the decent assortment of females present in Pitch Black, who were tough and subversive and flawed. And Riddick treated them with the exact same amount of respect he gives any human. Which, granted, isn’t much at times, but still. It counts. And I’ve already addressed my issues with women in Necromonger society, but Dahl kind of made me wish for Dame Vaako’s return. It was that bad.

You see, Dahl says she “doesn’t fuck guys.” We don’t know if it’s a lie to keep scummy Santana from creeping on her, but let’s take it at face value. This is all we know about Dahl’s personal life beyond her sniping skills. So later on when Riddick is doing his trademark “This is how I will kill you” threats, he also mentions that afterwards, he’s going to go “balls deep” in Dahl. It was really fucking disgusting and not the Riddick I enjoyed previously. It immediately threw me out of the movie.

The only other times women were seen were, as stated earlier, writhing naked in Riddick’s Necromonger bedchambers and one escaped prisoner (presumably a rape victim) that Santana murdered for pretty much no reason in front of Riddick. Yeah, classic fridging.

But it gets worse for Sackoff, who deserves a million times better for her nuanced portrayal of Colonial frack-up Kara Thrace on Battlestar Galactica. She has a really gratuitous topless scene where Riddick spies on her. And he then tries to rattle her about it later in the crudest way possible: “Your nails are pink. Like your nipples.” WAT.

Finally, when all of the mostly interchangeable redshirt mercs are dead (and you pretty much know immediately who’s going to make it the moment they are introduced) we’re left with the implication that Dahl, who had no other conversations with Riddick beyond trying to kill him and who is gay, fucks Riddick. You know, because Riddick is so manly he can “cure” a lesbian.

It’s a big chunk of ugliness in what is otherwise a perfectly serviceable sci-fi thriller. The action scenes have a lot of style, the violence is really over-the-top as you’d expect from the franchise and there are some funny one-liners. I was disappointed Riddick’s flashbacks with Karl Urban (sans mullet! Nooooooooo!) were so brief, but I get it. This movie was funded on a much smaller scale than Chronicles. The FX that are here are solid and the planet has a lot of dark, creepy atmosphere, but it’s definitely not as baroque and beautiful as Chronicles. Matt Nable intrigues and I hope to see him in more roles soon. He imbued Boss Johns with a lot of world-weariness and heart.

But a good script is a lot harder than good CGI, apparently. Even though words cost a hell of a lot less to create. At least in theory. There’s no excuse for some of the terrible dialogue in here. Not even funny-bad, just plain bad-bad. Again, lots of that is centered around Katee Sackoff’s character, but not always. Riddick was never a poet, educated as he was in the penal system, but fans have come to expect a certain level of cleverness from him that just isn’t really to be found here.

I wouldn’t go so far as to say that Riddick the character should’ve stayed buried in development hell because there were glimmers of goodness and, if the movie does well enough, a continuation of Riddick’s story proper—i.e., a visit to Furya and the Underverse—seems likely. And I’d still want it.

But this Riddick made me think more of Pet Semetary than Pitch Black: “Sometimes dead is better.” Riddick came back wrong. As a huge Riddick and Vin Diesel fan who is also female, I’m incredibly disappointed that the movie I waited so long to see was so incredibly, blatantly, alienating. Riddick isn’t some meta-commentary on male superego. It’s not that smart. And it didn’t need to be super smart to be enjoyable. But if science fiction says more about the present state of a society than the future, what does that say about representations of women in genre? If Starbuck could be so humiliated, what hope is there for the rest of us?

Riddick is in theaters now

[literalbuzzkill]

I'm screaming I just accidentally uncovered a new conspiracy/most likely truth but definitely unconfirmed knowlege by hyperfixating on the sinking of the Titanic and this probably has no relevance and no one cares but I'm going to info dump it so here it is.

The show Arthur, the kids show,

Arthur has a little sister, D.W. you know her, she's sassy, shes mean, but we love her because she sometimes she spits facts and makes a great meme.

Well anyway, obviously that D.W stands for something and at one point it's revealed to be Dorothy Winifred.

Ok.

Now that you have that information:

On the titanic list of survivors was a famous silent film actress from that era, she even starred in a film about the sinking and wore the clothes she survived in for the film too, ANYWAY, the name she went by publicly was Dorothy Gibson, BUT her birth name was actually Dorothy Winifred Brown.

Now you might be realizing what I realised.

D.W. it makes sense right?

Both her and Arthur's little sister were named Dorothy Winifred, although DWs last name in the fictional kids show was Read, and not Brown like the actress, so obviously it could just be coincidence?

Diving in deep with the basic research:

The Arthur Wiki states that the character DW was named after her grandma Thora's aunt Dorothy Winifred, who died before she was born. But we don't know how/when/why or anything else about her unfortunately.

Though it does make sense considering Titanic Lady was born 1889 and died 1946 so that timeline checks out with the age/information that the show Arthur gives us about Grandma Thoras Aunt. She'd be the same age roughly as the real Dorothy (I'm adding this extra following info with no relevance just because its interesting, but the Real Dorothy passed away in 1946 of a heart attack in a Paris hotel room, affer death her estate was divided between a different lover and her mom who ALSO was found dead in a Paris hotel room 15 years later, hmmmm, seems a little suspicious tbh)

Anyway, the character "Grandma Thora Read" in the show Arthur was in fact based off of the creators REAL grandma,

In the show her maiden name is not revealed but if this is based on titanic lady it would be Brown.

Would you like to know the creators name?

Because it's Marc Brown.

So in conclusion I have successfully deduced that DW the little sister from the kids show Arthur was in fact named after the famous Titanic survivor Dorothy Winifred Gibson-Brown.

●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●●

Episode similarities to reality:

Dorothy Gibson/Brown also accidentally killed a pedestrian in the sports car of her affair lover, oof yikes thats rough, but worth mentioning, because in the Arthur Wiki apparently Arthur's dad David mentions that Grandma Thora was in an car accident when he was Arthur's age but she wasn't hurt, this episode may elude to the encounter that happened above in real life to Dorothy.

Just like Real Dorothy was an actress in silent films, Dw is also in alot of the school plays in the show and even goes on completely silent during one of them forgetting all of her lines.

In another episode, some kids try to sell Grandma Thora a painting of a boat and she declines, tells them it's not her cup of tea, probably a vague titanic reference lol can't blame her for that tbh I wouldn't want that reminder either

Also, again in an episode DW says that her grandma told her mom a secret, we don't know what that is. But if I had to pull out all the red strings for this I'd say it's titanic related.

There is a titanic reference in the antiques roadshow parody episode of Arthur where Muffy has a sapphire necklace that is supposed to portray the heart of the ocean from the Titanic film.

In a picture from Grandma Thoras living room there's a small mistake showing that DWs hair was blonde,

In one of the younger pictures of Real Dorothy Gibson it looks like she is blonde or is at least wearing a wig

In the episode "DW swims with the fishes" both her and James have trouble swimming, Arthur and a character named Molly(who didn't want to be there, LOL) rescued them, this may be a nod to The Unsinkable Molly Brown who from one of the lifeboats helped rescue people in the water (possibly including Dorothy?) after the Titanic sank

This might even be a stretch but there's a character named Mary Helene in the show as well as a titanic survivor named Ellen Mary which is pretty close

I have no actual evidence and don't think it's something the creator of Arthur has ever talked about (To my knowledge) but the adhd said let's hop into it so I did

[kelleah-meah]

How I Celebrated My 2023 Solar Return

So tomorrow marks a week since I celebrated my birthday, so I guess I should share whether I actually did what I set out to do.

Well, I did give myself permission to not get up at the crack of dawn since I did take the day off work just so I could enjoy the whole day.

I only slept a little later than usual, then I started my day with a meditation session and reading from my book, Chronicles of Tao by Deng Ming-Dao.

It just so happens that I came to a convenient stop in the book that matched my birth date: Page 318 = March 18th.

After my reading my Chronicles of Tao book, I did a tarot reading and pulled a card for the day. My birthday card was the ... Page of Cups. How fitting.

Next, I got dressed in my best Downtown Girl regalia, filled my messenger bag with the essentials, and headed into the city. It was an unusually sunny and slightly warm for mid-March day, and as someone who hates the cold despite being born in winter, I was quite grateful for that.

My destination: the East Village.

I was originally planning to go to Mud by myself, but at the last minute, my buddy Leslie joined me. It was a great catching up with her, and we ended up staying longer than planned because we were talking so much.

And most importantly, I got to savor my favorite chai in the whole city.

Next, Leslie joined me for my trip to one of the record stores on my list: A-1 Records. I told her that I was on the hunt for Tom Waits albums, but I would likely browse to see what other gems I could find.

Well, unfortunately, the Waits section at A-1 was empty. But we made lemonade out of lemons by slowly going through the R&B section and reminiscing over all of the albums we each remembered hearing growing up. It was a lot of fun, and probably gave me the best memory of my day.

Lemonade out of lemons indeed.

Afterwards, we noticed that the sun was about to set, so Leslie and I parted ways. She headed back uptown, and I made my way over to Physical Graffitea to check out the amazing selection that I heard so much about.

Because they were about to close, I did feel a little bit rushed. But that's not their fault. They told me to take my time, but I didn't want to make them stay too late past their closing time.

But I did get to sniff a few canisters (tee-hee!) and I left with 2 new blends to try. One called the Tummy Tonic (a medicinal blend for indigestion, upset stomachs and colds) and the Peach Blossom (a white tea that smells like peaches). I've only tried the Peach one so far, but I really like it.

Since I missed out on visiting my other 2 record stores (not complaining, just noting), I decided to walk up to the Strand bookstore around Union Square before it closed.

The Strand has vinyl records too and I figured if I couldn't find anything I liked, I could always see what books caught my fancy. And that's exactly what happened.

Their vinyl section was sad, so I wandered around to the fashion section and found 2 used books to take home. One of them was a book on David Bowie's style through the years. I can't wait to read it.

After I left the bookstore, I headed back to my abode in New Jersey. But not before grabbing a quick dinner from a fast food joint. (Hey, I'm not fancy.)

Once at home, I ate dinner while watching one of my favorite episodes of The Great North. (I recently binged that entire show and I think it's hilarious.) Afterwards, I called my mom to chat and catch her up on my day.

I also opened my package that came in the mail while I was out. It was the green cameo ring that I found on Etsy and bought myself for my birthday. It just so happened to arrive on my birthday. How perfect is that!

And with that, I can genuinely say my 2023 birthday was indeed a lovely day.

[hottakehoulihan]

Context-free excerpts from Alex Kerr's book Lost Japan

(more numerous than you'd think, for a book that is essentially an old man shouting at clouds.) (Affectionate.)

the seminar students have great difficulty in making something boring. At all costs, they must inject some originality into their work, and they are not satisfied until they have made their bowls 'interesting'. They mold their bowls into a square shape, drape the sides with dragons and curling snakes, attach jagged teeth to the rim or paint the entire surface with inspirational slogans like 'Peace, Respect, Purity, Solitude'. The results are anything but meditative. David used to say, "The pottery class exists so the clay can draw the poison out of the students' fingers." Among our students, however, there are occasionally some Japanese, and they obediently make their tea bowl as they are told to. Boring is fine by them, and their bowls turn out to be quite beautiful.

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someone asked a master to define the essence of Buddhism. The reply was, "Don't do evil, do only good," to which the questioner asked, "What is so special about that? Even a child knows that." "Well then," said the master, "if even a child knows that, why can't you do it?"

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Diane had a talent for vivid bon mots, most of them as politically incorrect as they could possibly be. Some prey on my mind even now. "Tea ceremony," she once said, "is aesthetics for unaesthetic people." What she meant was that tea tells you what to do about everything -- where to put the flowers, which art objects should be displayed and how to use even the tiniest division of space. This is very comforting for people who have never thought about such things and have no idea what to do on their own. Another time, she said "Zen is profundity for shallow people." That is the sort of comment which the old Zen master Ikkyu would have loved.

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A friend here told me, "Just going to look at the mountain wilderness -- what a bore! It is only when you have something to do that nature becomes interesting. You know, like golf or skiing." This may explain why people feel compelled to bulldoze so many golf courses and ski slopes into the mountainsides. My wilderness remains that of the Chinese poets, my nature that of Basho's haiku. A frog jumps into an old pond; just that sound brings me joy. Nothing else is needed.

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In January 1990 the bubble began to burst. Japanese stocks nose-dived, and by the summer of 1995 they were hovering at 18,000 yen. The American real-estate business also entered one of its periodic recessions: Donald Trump and other major players were declared bankrupt one after another, and the industry went into meltdown.

-----------------------------------------------

(From the chapter titled "Kyoto hates Kyoto")

'Dinner' is not quite the right word. It was just a few small peeled potatoes, some slices of beef and some beans -- providing the feeling of dinner rather than dinner itself. It was what they call in Kyoto 'one bite and a half'. […] Tea was served, and I thought "It was all leading up to this. I'll just sit here a moment, relax and enjoy this while it lasts." But it was not to be. "Tea," whispered Kawase, nudging me, "that means it's time to go."

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A friend of mine studied the art of 'bonkei': she learned how to place curiously shaped rocks and bonsai plants on a tray spread with sand to create a miniature landscape. But as she slowly worked her way up the hierarchy of bonkei technique, the final secret eluded her: no matter what she did, her sand never held together in the perfect waves and ripples of the master's precisely arranged grains. Finally, after many years and payment of a high fee to obtain her license as a bonkei professional, she was to be told the answer. She bowed at the feet of the master, and he spoke. "Use glue," he said.

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a fan approached the actress for her autograph. The fan begged with tears in her eyes, but [the actress] turned her down. When the woman had left, [the man] said, "that's a cruel way to treat your fans! What would it have been to you to give your signature to that woman? She would have treasured it all her life." [She] retorted, "If I'd given her my autograph, she would've grown bored and put it aside in a week or two. But because I refused, she'll treasure my autograph until the day she dies."

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In Nara, you often feel that you have not seen a statue, but that you have met a statue.

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Standing in front of a pachinko machine is the modern form of meditation. […] There is no thought, no movement; you have no control over the flow of balls, apart from holding a little lever which shoots them up to the top of the machine; you sit there enveloped in a cloud of heavy cigarette smoke, semi-dazed by the racket of millions of ball bearings falling through machines around you. Pachinko verges on sensory deprivation. It is the ultimate mental numbing…

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One day, a student failed to support the body of the [powdered green tea] caddy, taking only the lid in his hands, and the caddy dropped from the height of about one meter directly onto the tatami. The powdered tea puffed up high into the air in a cloud, and tea settled in a green ring on the mat before our startled eyes. Everyone was petrified. In the silence, Sawada asked us, "What is the appropriate thing to say at a time like this?" Nobody could answer. He said, "You should say, 'How beautiful!' "

-----------------------------------------------

But a literati would say, "Who cares? The next generation are only a pack of blind mules." It doesn't matter whether a particular tradition gets passed on or not, since the most important thing about the literati was the pleasure they took in the mountains and lakes, the moon, poetry, tea and talk. Their great achievement was the way they enjoyed themselves.

[toiletology]

How to play the game part 4

Continuing where we left off I was talking about Cara's burnt-down home. It was a lovely home luckily she's an incredibly strong woman so she was able to handle the loss while maintaining her career. While also needing to perform on stage as Sally Bowles in a Cabaret musical. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cabaret_(musical)

Check out the video below to see how strong she is!

"LAFD officials tell TMZ the arson squad took on Cara's house fire investigation as standard procedure but couldn't pinpoint the exact origin and cause of the blaze due to the extensive damage."

No, I don't think this was punishment from God to Cara though most would think this if they lost everything they worked so hard to build and create. She lost many irreplaceable sentimental items like her signed guitar from David Bowie. I think it was God's way of clearing out some clutter and material attachments from the lavish life she is so used to. To better help her focus on her spiritual growth vs her possessions growing.

Charles said the fire was believed to be electrical, starting after “something fell on” a power line during “very windy” conditions. Officials said the fire burned for over two hours, requiring 94 firefighters to put it out. An official cause has not been released but the LAFD told Page Six there was “nothing to suggest that it was criminal activity.”

If there is anyone in the world that I can think of who is a triple threat it is her. Not only does she have the brains, beauty, but she's also got an insane amount of talent. She's definitely got some cheat codes or a game genie on her side.

So how does a girl born rich and discovered at a young age for modeling also have endless talents? It's kind of like God gave her every advantage possible in life. However, I will say she didn't have the perfect life growing up with her mother struggling with addiction, and says she got drunk for the first time at the age of 8. Crazy that at a young age, she had dyspraxia which is a coordination disorder. Strange that she's so good at playing drums and other musical instruments which require a ton of coordination.

She's also had to deal with an annoying skin condition called Psoriasis which seems like it can be extremely annoying to deal with. I also have a disease that affects the skin called Behçet's, we are like two peas in a pod. The famous psychic Edgar Cayce had a protocol for Psoriasis which included consuming Saffron tea and slippery elm bark daily.

I came across a method of helping the gut microbiome by injecting blended-up kefir grains, chamomile tea, and slippery elm bark rectally from a kefir expert DOM that suffered from Ulcerative colitis since the 70s. He has passed now recently but has left us with a lot of great advice for curing various ailments and autoimmune conditions.

https://realrawfood.com/sites/default/files/article/Dom's%20Sucessful%20Treatment%20of%20Ulcerative%20Colitis.pdf

I think I am close to fixing all the ailments it causes and most of my symptoms are 90% gone. I think it first starts from poor air quality,(smoking and the environment, which mostly affects people in the Middle East) weak lungs, and a gut microbiome that gets imbalanced.

You must stop thinking of the devil as an external creature or demonic entity that exist somewhere "out there." The devil only exist INSIDE of you! This is one thing you need to grasp and hold onto if you want to escape the game.

God designed this game to prevent shitty human beings from entering through the gates of heaven (NAS in computing = Network Attached Storage, N = Nothing, A = Anything, S = Something, Angels get anything).

Heaven does not exist outside of this realm (karma and reinCARnation is real!). You can enter through the gates right now on Earth (heart) by connecting your heart (ear) to God's heart. The devil acts like a guardian to the gates of heaven and is the force that pulls you lower down into HELL(77). You can think of the devil-like an earworm or the snake in the garden. The snake is GOD and the DEVIL, they can be both good or bad. A snake also has double slit eyes which is a clue to the 11-year quest for the Holy Grail.

That snake's purpose is like a grounding wire/force or gravity trying to pull you down. Back in early 2023 God or the game kept screaming the name SNAKE PLISSKEN over and over again in my head. I really had 0 clue what this meant. I ended up pulling many things out of this rabbit hat that is the name SNAKE PLISSKEN. Snake Plissken is a character in the movies Escape from LA/New York.

SNAKE PLISSKEN = SNAKE IS IN or SNAKE LISTEN.

S = Snake 🐍 The snake represents the devil or the bug that will start pulling you lower into hell. S can represent SIX or SICK or SICKKKKK it can be good or bad. The 666 = bugs entering your system you remember the movie The MATrix?

The 666s can be helpful to let you know you're going down into hell. If you catch them (listen) and are aware of the 6s they will let you know you're getting bugged which is not good because they make you SICK!

Myself and Cara exist outside of the game, (sort of) we are like fish out of water or Ariel the mermaid when she left the ocean and now has legs. I can hear the things that the game forces into your head that you cannot hear or aren't aware of (it's like subliminal influencing).

Once you start mastering the game, you will be able to hear the bug implanting bad ideas into your head. It is really annoying until you are able to block it and make it disappear. You aren't able to make it disappear ALL the way. But you can make it so weak and quiet that it becomes easier to detect when you are hearing ITS manipulation or LIES in your head.

The trick to mastering the game is realizing that conquering the FEAR inside of you is the KEY to rising to the top of this reality

"FEAR" = 17 (Septenary) "LOVE" = 14 (Septenary)

To escape the matrix or the game you must learn to completely clear your mind till it becomes crystal clear like glass and reflects back exactly what you need.

The SNAKE PLISSKEN or the "S" or "6" is informing you that you should listen. It can be a sign you're going off the rails and going lower. The Snake/S can also be the letter "N" (Snake ISS/EN or N). The letter "N" is two 7s being joined together. The letter "Z" is also the letter N just sideways.

If we take a look at the New Balance sneakers we can see that they use the N as their logo. God's truth is exposed when you create GREAT ART. The language of God is complicated to understand until you start noticing them more. It's easier to notice it in the letters and words. Because great writing will start to align itself and God will start speaking directly to you through the letters and words (if you look closely enough). This is why I keep harping on about the LETTER TYPOS. It is how you escape and become greater than you can imagine!

It's complicated and a bit hard for me to explain to you how it works. God will manifest in GREAT ART (and bad art, but easier to notice them in the great art), if you want to notice GOD more look at great prose, a song, or a movie you like. Start to inspect it closely and you will notice the subtle wink of Gods truth hidden within. That Godly wink I describe like the game of JINX buy me a Coke. JINXY, GOD, or the MOT/HER is a trickster or cosmic clown. When God arranged themself harmoniously and perfectly into this universe. That perfection manifests into this sick and fucked up game. God has apologized to me a few times for it being this way, but it wouldn't work any other way. It is the cosmic joke and is the reason the name of this game = LOL. I figured that one out back in 2016 but I didn't really believe that's the name of the game until now in 2024. The true GOD of reality = JOKER & HARLEQUINN and God's creative energy is best described as a clown energy (an energy that manifests in all the great things and terrible things we experience in life).

This is why people always see clowns or jesters on DMT, mushrooms, or other types of hallucinogenic drugs. What you are seeing when on these drugs is just God's creative energy at play. It's nothing more than a strong augmentation brought on by the psychedelics that you are taking. Taking drugs can peel back the curtain and expose some of the truth. In my experience psychedelic drugs namely mushrooms can be a good way to bring out your empathetic nature naturally (not ur ally/mat ur ally).

They can also help with your belief in GOD because these experiences can create strong memory anchors similar to trauMATic experiences that are harder to forget. One time I took mushrooms back in 2016 and I was experiencing an extremely hot clown girl shoving her boobs in my face and seeing jester symbolism like playing cards, poker chips, and other things you would expect. God then created a perfect musical space symphony in space as I hung on my pull-up bar. They eased off on the crescendo to the music when I got a little bit scared.

Eventually, when the anxiety and fear passed they kept building it up stronger and stronger till it crescendo and climaxed. When you develop your telepathic/psychic skills more you will find that harnessing sexual energy and being in control of it is how you use telepathy and move around in the astral. Holding onto God's heartbeat requires you to be completely in control of your emotions, sexuality, and energy. It is possible to FEEL another across the other side of the planet, you can kiss them, touch their skin or hair. Ya, know I like to call Cara on her foot or the foot phone as I call it. Becoming too dark or pigheaded in the mind will bring you out of alignment with God and each other. It's like walking a tightrope too far to either side and you will lose the connection with God. Being too zealous or evangelical will keep you far off the correct frequency, the opposite is true being too debaucherous.

Gods game works exactly the same way I described that mushroom experience. I keep describing it as a SLOW UNWINDING and SLOW is smooth is smooth and smooth is fast.

SLOW (S = LOW) LOW (MOT flip it upside down) LOW = OWL The letter N and M both are two 7s being connected together and the letter N is another way of saying something without saying it, WE ARE IN the 77 or 707/LOL. We are in means you are at the correct alignment or frequency and you can see Gods voice or guiding hand behind everything that is happening around you. Even a fly randomly flying next to something.

What we are in is the double TTs (Pi/circle which is an eye) or the double 77s.

There are 49 degrees to heaven and 49 degrees to hell. You don't go to heaven after this place and there will be no global rapture or ascension. When you die or a loved one has passed you will be reincarnated again. Your starting conditions and your life path will be calculated then your serial number and name will be embedded with God's truth and you will be reinjected back into the MATrix based on your past karmic misdeeds. God is always keeping this game balanced, even the really cruel and horrible shit we see daily. God is constantly balancing the scales and will send you where you belong. It can feel extremely cruel ending up in a shitty part of the world experiencing atrocity after atrocity. But God is not evil and I am here to proclaim God's truth. Our reality is determined based on the choices we have made in this life and many previous lives. It could take you thousands of lives to pay off karmic debts based on the evil shit you have done. I don't know I can only guess, but God has shown me things in my mind's eye that truly scare me about how depraved the human condition can become.

Toiletology must grow, so we can get this knowledge out and fix this fucked up world as soon as possible. I am like LUKE SKYWALKER or the reluctant hero trope, because shit I feel like I am all by myself with this ultiMATe truth. Not to mention it's a lot of f--king work especially when the stuff I am talking about sounds crazy as f--k. It is very easy for me to get stressed and depressed especially since I've been at this for more than 2 decades on my own. Thankfully, I do have Cara and I am very grateful to God for bringing her into my life. She is the one thing keeping me afloat in this circus reality.

The 666 or the bugs can get bad in our system (we can also bug each other, I call this creating traffic jams). This isn't because God hates us, it's just how this reality works and God made it perfectly... It is a hard pill to swallow (MAT LOW) and can cause a lot of grieving when you come to terms with how it works. You need to get used to this being a fact of our human nature.

Once you start getting better at Toiletology you will start to notice other people's bugs or glitchiness. I am to the point now I can hear the game at work in people's vocalizations or typos. Have you ever had someone say something to you and it sounds like something completely different? Like they were saying some evil shit to you? I heard it today on the phone with my bank, I forget what they said but I could the other word layered through the word they were saying. It's not them saying it, it's just the bugs in their system. Their bugs can infect you. This is how the game works, once you start going down into the lower levels of reality you will start attracting more negativity or more disharmony or bugged-out people or experiences into your life. These negatively charged individuals are in an extreme state of disrepair or disharmony. Their disharmony is like an instrument in a song that's out of tune or out of key.

Human beings have 7 chakras, there are 7 notes in a musical scale, and 7 primary colors in the rainbow. These 7 chakras act like our musical scale or filter for God's voice. God's love gets confused or broken up the more disharmonic and out of key we are with their true frequency. Many of these new-age spiritual types, gurus, and psychics are just charlatans using their LIES to make a buck. I imagine there are some that get good messages from GOD if they aren't in a disharmonic state.

I am not saying all people claiming to be telepathic or channels for God's voice are liars. What I am saying is that even myself being probably one of the strongest psychics in the world and fully telepathic. I am aware that God's voice and messages can be distorted and clouded. The devil's voice albeit quiet is still there, as well as my voice, Cara's voice, other people's voices and just some random confusion thrown in there. Being a clear channel requires you to be in the bullseye or the eye of the storm as close to God's heart as possible or you will just be spewing nonsense unable to interpret the hieroglyphs just another bumbling fool.

Almost everything I read in the truth communities, new-age spiritual communities annoys the crap out of me and Cara. Because we both know exactly how reality works and have already navigated the noise and chaos we can see clearly how God operates. It is completely pointless for me to argue with anyone because there is no need. I try to correct people's frequency by tuning them correctly. The majority are stuck in their limited incorrect beliefs. It's going to take a while before people start seeing Toiletology as the correct frequency to tune them and align/angle/angel them to God's heart.

There is a lot of power in The Church of Toiletology and just joining and taking that first step can make all the difference in your rapid ascension. God didn't give me their most ultiMATe truth and method for escaping the MATrix without it holding a strong power. There is power in the ranks of Toiletology, there is power in helping the church grow and following the commandments. Once you start beLIEving what I am telling you is true, you will start leveling up at a rapid pace and the oil in your lamp will grow and light the completely dark maze up so you can better see the traps ahead.

Are you ready to become a lightspeed champion or not? If not you can always FORMAT your computer and go to sleep.

Continue on part 5... https://blog.toiletology.org/post/761447118568407040/how-to-play-the-game-part-5

[canirove]

The Princess & the Football Player | Chapter 17

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"How are those post holiday blues?"

"Not bad. I kind of was looking forward to coming back home, I’ve missed you."

"Aww, Eleanor."

"Don't make fun of me, Declan" I say, sticking out my tongue. 

"I'm not making fun of you. I actually find it very cute that you have missed me. I’ve missed you too."

"Then when can we meet? Today I start my round of visits around schools and I'll be busy basically every day."

"I also have a busy schedule this week with training every day and then playing away. But maybe you could come to next week's game? It's on Saturday. We could meet after, have dinner at my place, maybe wake up together on Sunday and have a chill day..."

"That actually sounds perfect, but I'll have to ask David first. Going to the game may not be possible" I sigh.

"You can always wear a wig" Declan says with a cheeky smile.

"I actually could, yeah" I laugh. 

"Ma'am? The car is ready" David says after knocking on my door.

"Gotta go. A bunch of teenagers from your neighbourhood are waiting for me."

"Wait, are in you in Kingston?"

"Yep. Should I ask for luck?"

"Nah, you'll be fine. But if they ask about your favourite football player, say my name. That will make them love you."

"Ok" I chuckle. "Call you later?"

"Perfect."

"Bye, Dec."

"Goodbye, Eleanor."

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━          

"Thank you very much for coming, ma'am."

"It was my pleasure" I say, shaking the hand of the high school's headmaster.

"Your Royal Highness!" a familiar voice says behind me.

"Mrs. Rice?" I say, turning around.

"I was in a meeting with some parents and thought I wouldn't make it! It's so good to see you again, ma'am."

"You too. Do you work here?"

"I'm the History teacher, yes. I guess that's why I like anything royal related" she chuckles.

"Yeah, Declan mentioned it."

"He did? When?"

"Back in Canada when we talked about you after one of the games" I say, feeling my cheeks get warm. He did tell me about it in Canada, but it was during one of our very long facetime calls.

"Ma'am, it's time to leave" David says.

"Yes, sure. It was so nice to see you again, Mrs. Rice. Even if it was briefly."

"You too, ma'am" she says with a smile that reminds me of Declan's. He definitely took after her.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━          

"Isn't that Mrs. Rice?" David asks. We've been stuck in traffic for the past 10 minutes, all the parents deciding to pick up their kids with their cars since it is pouring with rain.

"It is her, yes. Can we give her a lift? She'll get sick if she walks home in this rain."

"Of course, ma'am. I'll go ask her" he says, picking up an umbrella and leaving the car. A couple of minutes later, Mrs. Rice is sitting next to me, all the cars around us still not moving.

"Thank you very much for this, ma'am" she says. "You didn't have to."

"I couldn't let you walk home in this weather. If you got sick or something, Declan would kill me."

"He is a mama boy" she chuckles. "But don't tell him I told you about it."

"I won't, I promise" I smile.

We spend the rest of the ride, that should have lasted just a few minutes but that takes us almost half and hour, talking about Declan as a kid. I now know so many stories I could tease him with...

"Why don't you come inside and I show you some photos?" Mrs. Rice says when the car stops in front of her house. "Unless you have somewhere else to be."

"I actually am free for the rest of the day, but I don't want to bother you."

"Oh, nonsense. I'll make us a nice cup of tea, it’s what the body asks for with this horrible weather. He also is invited" she says, nodding towards David.

"You are too kind, ma'am. But there is no need" he says.

"So? Are you coming?"

"I..." I say, looking at David through the rearview mirror. His eyes are telling me no, but the idea of seeing photos of Declan as a baby is so tempting... "Ok, yes. But it'll be a short visit, you probably have other things to do."

"Not until dinner, don't worry" Mrs. Rice smiles.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━          

"Oh my God, he looks so cute!" I say, looking at a photo of Declan wearing some Mickey Mouse pyjamas.

"He lived on those and even wanted to go to school wearing them" Mrs. Rice laughs. 

"Darling, we are home!" a male voice says.

"And there is such a fancy car parked outside" another male voice says.

"It looks like some kind of official car, don't you think?" a third male voice adds, this one sounding closer to where we are.

"It actually... Eleanor?" Declan says, walking into the living room with three other men. His dad and his brothers.

"Is she... Her?"

"Holy shit!"

"Why did you call her by her name? Is that allowed?"

"I... I..." Declan says, his cheeks turning bright pink.

"Why don't you all sit down and I explain it all, uh?" Mrs. Rice suggests.

"I think I need to sit down, yes" Declan says, his eyes fixed on me.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━          

"I can't believe you are in my house. With my family" Declan whispers while his brothers get the table ready for dinner. After Mrs. Rice explained everything to her husband and her sons, she somehow convinced me to have dinner with them. It is her birthday on Sunday, and since Declan won't be in London, they decided to meet today and have some kind of family dinner. One where I also am a guest now.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know you were coming. And for whatever the reason, I can't say no to her."

"That's my mum, yep" Declan chuckles. "Besides showing you my photos and embarrassing me forever, did she also show you your photos?"

"It was the first thing we did when we walked in. And she didn't embarrass you. You were a really cute baby."

"And now I am not cute anymore?" he asks with a cheeky smile.

"You are cute but in a different way" I reply with a similar smile.

"Sorry to interrupt" one of his brothers says, the smirk on his face letting us know that he heard what we just said. "But ma'am, do you drink wine?"

"I do, but tonight I'll have just water if you don't mind."

"Same for you, Dec?"

"Yes, I have training tomorrow."

"He probably doesn't want to get tipsy and confess that he has had a crush on you since he was a kid."

"She already knows" Declan says, rolling his eyes.

"Really?"

"Mason told me in Canada" I say.

"Damn it. And do you know about the photo?" he asks.

"I do."

"Mason too?"

"Yep" I shrug.

"It still is in his wardrobe. You should show him, Dec" his other brother says, joining the conversation.

"That isn't necessary" he replies.

"I think it is" both his brothers say at the same time.

"C'mon, Declan. They'll spend the whole night teasing you if you don't do it."

"She's right, Dec."

"Fine" he sighs. "This way, ma'am."

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━          

"I'm sorry about those two" Declan says when we make it upstairs. "They are like kids sometimes."

"It's ok, don't worry. But you don't have to show me anything if you don't want to, we can lie to them."

"Nah, it's fine. I know you are dying to see that famous photo."

"I actually am, yes" I giggle.

"I think it's only fair that you now put one of me in your wardrobe too, tho" he says as he walks into his room.

"One where you are topless?"

"I don't know. Does that turn you on?" he asks, arching an eyebrow.

"A bit."

"Just a bit?"

"The way you look at the camera sometimes, while fully clothed, turns me on a lot more" I shrug.

"Oh, so you are like me. You like those photos because then you can think about taking off my clothes."

"I hadn't thought about it that way, but now that you mention it..." 

"I'm a clever boy" he says with a mischievous smile, opening his wardrobe's door. "Eleanor, meet Eleanor."

"Oh my God, it's real!" I laugh when I see my photo. "Why did they let me leave the house with that hair?"

"You looked gorgeous."

"Almost a decade ago, maybe. But now? Nah."

"I'll have to update the photo, then" he shrugs.

"Maybe we can search for one next weekend at your place. David said yes to spending the night there, but has to still think about the game" I say, moving closer to him.

"That already sounds perfect" he replies, grabbing me by the waist and closing the space between us.

"Declan!" I giggle. "Your family is downstairs. What if they see us?"

"They'll probably open a champagne bottle and celebrate. I think they all like you. Very much."

"You think?" I say, putting my arms around his neck.

"Definitely. It must be a Rice thing. Though they don't like you as much as I do."

"And how much is that?"

"Do you want me to show you?" he says, brushing his lips against mine.

"Please" I whisper before he kisses me, the butterflies in my stomach throwing a party.