#I also believe this applies to many other fields. I’m a teacher

[crystaltoa]

I’m going to go the second one because I believe there’s a difference between ‘a robot could do this job’ and ‘a robot SHOULD do this job’. Even in a world where robots can emulate almost any human behaviour or skill.

(Content warning: I discuss some pretty heavy hypotheticals relating to medical abuse, eugenics, racism and ableism)

You know the rule that “a computer can never be held accountable. Therefore a robot should never make a management decision” Well, these days, people do delegate management decisions to robots. But the robot lacks human values and understanding of nuance. It is still impacted by biases, sometimes to an even greater extent than a human. And our understanding of bias, equality and equity is constantly evolving and is driven by human values. If you take humans out of the equation, who is checking the AI for biases and reasonable behaviour? Another AI?

Look at politics. Like it or not, a sufficiently powerful politician is going to have to make difficult decisions that will ultimately impact who lives and who dies (decisions on health, war, crime and the justice system, etc.) And a robot politician is going to face the same problems. An AI politician programmed with the objective of letting nobody die is going to fail horribly, since such a thing is likely impossible, even for the most advanced AI of the distant future. So, it will always have to act on the logic that a certain number of humans may die as a consequence of its actions, but that it should keep that number as low as possible using the information that it is given.

An AI is going to boil this down to a system of logic. If the goal is to use the available resources to minimise the number of lives lost, and no human life is inherently more valuable than any other, then it is going to spend the bulk of its resources on areas where it will have the greatest impact and save the greatest number of lives.

Now that sounds good on paper, doesn’t it? But there is a problem: if you reduce the issues down to a multiple choice game, it allows no space for inspiration, creativity, and nuanced discussion of ethics.

if you gave our robo-politician the trolley problem, it would quickly tell you that pulling the lever was the correct option as it minimises the number of lives lost. Okay, you might think. Sounds reasonable. Lots of humans who engage with the problem reach the same conclusion.

But the thing is, the robo-politician will pull that lever again and again and again without ever considering that perhaps it’s possible to change the system so that there aren’t so many people stuck on the tracks in the path of an oncoming train in the first place. If the robo-politician already thinks it has enough information to solve the problem, it won’t seek new information. It won’t try to come up with a better system. It will always be a two-choice logic problem that it already has an adequate solution to.

It’s theoretically possible that a robot politician might actually do an adequate job (at least compared to some human politicians) simply by playing this numbers game and emulating actions of past politicians that have produced good results before.

BUT

If you want meaningful systemic change driven by new ideas, you need human involvement. AI’s ability to at least simulate creativity probably will improve in the coming years, but balancing the new AI-generated solutions with a respect for human values and quality of life is a very complex thing.

Furthermore, there’s a need for nuance that AI may not ever be able to fully grasp. If the goal is only to minimise number of lives lost, in the most economically viable way, you could wind up with dystopian scenarios like the following:

“We want to reduce the number of people who die when receiving medical treatment. Therefore, euthanasia/medically assisted dying is now illegal, because that results in human deaths” (ignoring human bodily autonomy and quality of life needs)

Or conversely, “Keeping some disabled and chronically ill people alive takes resources that could be used for other purposes. Therefore, it makes economic sense to euthanise some of the higher-care needs patients so that those resources can be used to save other lives at a more cost-effective rate.” (Horrendously ableist)

“We want medical resources and funding to go where they will help the most people. No human life is inherently worth more or less than any other. This country has a lot more white people than black people. Therefore, it makes economic sense to focus funding, research, and training of future medical practitioners primarily on the care and treatment of white patients” (Perpetuating or even amplifying existing societal inequalities, dismissing helping minorities as not economically viable)

“We want to reduce the number of people affected by serious health conditions, which puts a drain on medical resources and reduces the number of lives we can save. Therefore, people who carry genes for certain conditions will be deterred or outright prevented from reproducing” (again, horrendously ableist and robs people of bodily autonomy)

“We want to reduce deaths from vehicle and other types of accidents that occur primarily outside the home. Therefore, there are now stricter regulations regarding when humans should be allowed to leave their homes.” (Authoritarian police state).

(Note: The intent here is not to imply that dedicating resources to vulnerable minorities is “objectively” illogical or wasteful. The point is that logic is only as good as the goals and principles behind it, and having overly simplistic success criteria without strong ethical considerations will result in those vulnerable groups suffering further mistreatment and neglect)

Humans have a wide range of needs, values and priorities that vary between individuals. Safety vs Autonomy, Privacy vs Protection, etc. And a politician must be compassionate and responsive to those values, even with all their contradictions, but to do so, human input and participation is required. No one politician, human or otherwise, is going to get it exactly right and please everybody. But a human is still going to have more success in trying than a robot, as it is near impossible to reduce the balance of these issues down to mere numbers and algorithms.

So while I’ll entertain the idea that a robot maybe could run a country, I don’t think anything would ever convince me that they should do so.

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

[yan-lorkai]

Hi!! I loved your hcs of the Octotrio with a yuu that seems to only have a talent in art. I related to it a lot because sometimes I feel like I’m not good at anything else other than drawing.

I was wondering if you could do the same prompt with Riddle, Ace, Deuce, Cater, Leona, Malleus & the Scarabia boys please? If that’s too many you can just do Leona, Malleus, & Scarabia. Thank you 😊

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ A/N: I guess everyone has one of those episodes, huh? I've been writing for more than 8 years now and sometimes I get hit by the "aa but I'm only good at writing, I should totally try something" and then I try something new and hate it bcs I really love to write and nothing can compare lmao. Anyway, I hope you like this darling, I did all the characters requested too btw ~

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Ace would be playful and encouraging, but his competitive nature would lead him to manipulate situations to keep you close. He’d play little tricks to make sure you stay dependent on him, offering "helpful" critiques that subtly undermine your confidence in anything but your art. His lighthearted facade would hide a deeper need to be the center of your attention, he is your muse, the one you use to practice, the who inspires you, making sure that you see him as the only one who truly understands and supports you, all while ensuring you don't realize how he’s subtly sabotaging any other talents you might want to try to explore, for he fears you will not want to spend more time with him anymore if that was the case.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Cater would use his social media prowess to make you art the talk of the school, ensuring your work — and by extension, his support — is always in the spotlight. However, his validation would come with a price, as he subtly isolates you from others, creating an environment where you feel your art is only appreciated by him and his curated audience. Cater’s charming persona would hide his darker intentions, as he manipulates your into believing that your worth is tied to the art you create under his influence, all while keeping you emotionally dependent on his constant praise. You're already good at other things, so surely you don't need to have another hobby, right?

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Deuce, unlike Ace, would be fiercely protective of your artistic talent. He’d encourage your art with an almost desperate intensity, pushing you to try different brushes and pens, different scenarios and things, but he'd also pressure you to stay focused on what your good at, ensuring you don’t waste time on things you never tried before. His possessiveness would manifest in his need to be your protector, to the point where he'd become intimidating towards anyone who tries to steer you away from your art, that does not apply to yourself, while he think your drawings / paintings are very beautiful, he would not force you to make it more if you're having an episode where you doubt your skills and think you are good only on the art field. If you want to explore new things, Deuce will be by your side the entire time.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Riddle would be intensely supportive yet controlling, pushing you to perfect your craft while ensuring you don't stray too far from his strict rules, even more if you are already his lover. His obsession with your success would become borderline suffocating, as he constantly monitors your progress and enforces discipline to keep you on the right path, nurturing your already beautiful talent. To Riddle, your art is flawless, it's personal and have a touch of you in every drawing, be it digital or traditional. When you come to tell him about your doubts, about how you're only good at art, Riddle promptly sooth you with gentle words, albeit he is a little awkward while talking. He offer to teach you about whatever you want to learn but be prepared because he is somewhat a strict teacher.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Leona would admire your dedication to your art, and he would ask questions about it too, learning as much as your interest as possible. However, his possessiveness would be almost primal, keeping you close under the guise of protection, ensuring you don’t waste time on anything — or anyone — else. Leona would be dismissive of your attempts to explore other talents, reinforcing that your art is the only thing that matters. His control would be subtle yet overpowering, as he ensures your world revolves around him and your art, leaving you with little room for anything else.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Malleus would shower you with endless admiration, captivated by your artistic talent, even more if you were influenced by an artistic movement. He'll notice all the little details, the subtle way the traces converge, how the color scheme is perfect, the way the shadows and the light reflect. He is your number 1 fan, so supportive of you. However, his intense fascination would drag you into his lonely world, where your art becomes your only outlet and he is your audience - though he has your drawings framed and hung on the walls of the castles, so everyone can look at it and admire. Malleus may not understand your struggles and why would you want to pursue another hobby, but he can arrange anything you may want to try at least once, from singing and dancing to sewing and knitting, even the art of potion making, archery or fencing. He just know you're going to find something you like as much as your art, and if you are happy so is he.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Jamil would secretly nurture your talent, subtly guiding your creativity while undermining any attempts you make to excel elsewhere, he sees your art as something free and with many meanings - it makes him relaxed in some sort of way and Jamil wants to be a little greedy here, he wants you to continue creating more pieces, always keeping you under his watchful eye as you started drawing / painting. There's just something so intimate, so calming about it he can't wrap his head around. He loves watching you creating your art, feeling is guard lowering just a little. If you ever approach him with your doubts, Jamil take you to the kitchen so he can teach you a few things about cooking. It's a different kind of art but when all is said and done, it's just as good as when you're creating and make you feeling accomplished.

.⁠｡⁠*⁠♡ Kalim would be so overwhelmingly supportive and enthusiastic about it, showering you with gifts and opportunities to nurture your artistic talent, buying everything you may need to create your art, a new software? Sure, no problem, he brought the most expensive one too. A few new pencils and pens? Right away. You need more frames and paints? It will be here in a couple of hours. However, his naivety mixed with possessiveness would lead to unintentional control over your life, as he tries to keep you happy and close by his side. Kalim’s well-meaning gestures would create a gilded cage, where your art flourishes but your freedom is slowly stripped away. He would be oblivious to the suffocating effect of his love, believing that as long as you're happy creating art with him, nothing else matters, leaving you feeling trapped and not knowing how to communicate with him. He have done so much for you already!

[bettsfic]

Desolately need a teacher’s perspective. If you feel comfortable can you way in on this:

I’m thinking of switching to English with a writing concentration because I love reading and learning about writing. However, I’m worried about a few things:

1. People keep saying there are no jobs for English majors

2. I’m worried that reading and writing in my academic life, may either crush my love for it in my personal life(e.g. bad professors or students who rip you to shreds(so not constructive criticism really))or cause me to be too burnt out to read or write on my own time.

Sorry just to add (in regards to my question about being an English major): I’m terribly afraid that my writing voice may change into something inauthentic when takings certain writing courses in this major.

these are all good and difficult questions.

to start, there are as many jobs for english majors as there are for anyone else. except maybe, idk, engineering or nursing or something. and if engineering or nursing are things you enjoy *almost* as much as english, then that might be a good option. but an english degree will qualify you for any basic office job and also jobs in publishing, copywriting, copyediting, media and communications, and a whooole lot of other things. publishing is a nightmare, yes, but not more so than most other industries. and with the right amount of hustle, freelance copywriting can be an extremely lucrative profession. if you're willing to move to LA or NYC, there will be many, many opportunities available to you. they might not be good opportunities, and you might not succeed all the time, but you'll make do. personally i think it's better to spend 4 years (and a lot of money) learning something intrinsically valuable to you and risk a more unstable job market than it is to slog through 4 years in a subject you're less passionate about but that has a clearer career trajectory.

more importantly, your major doesn't matter nearly as much as it might seem. what matters is completing the degree to the best of your ability and learning to apply the knowledge you obtain to multiple fields. as much as some people would have you believe, you can't predict or plan for your entire future. you can only honor yourself and your interests in the present.

but that's english. creative writing is a different beast. i don't recommend majoring in creative writing unless you need the motivation of a hard deadline. it doesn't open more doors for you than an english degree does, and very very few cw professors get adequate training in creative pedagogy. a good professor is great, but a bad professor can ruin writing for you for a long time. unlike an english degree which is a medium risk for a big reward, a cw focus is a high risk for a medium reward. if you're already writing on your own time for your own fulfillment, that's more important than writing for a class.

you're right about a cw degree changing your voice into something inauthentic, and you're right about it damaging your creative motivation. both of those things have some benefits, though: when you adapt your voice into something it's not, later it'll snap back into an even stronger version of what you're doing now; and being forced to write for certain assignments will offer discipline so that you learn to write well even when you're uninspired and unmotivated.

regardless, all of that is better suited for an MFA. 4 years reading, 2-3 years writing. that will get you the education you're looking for and you'll be spending that time doing work you enjoy. i don't recommend going straight to the MFA after the BA, but people do that all the time anyway. the MFA will pay you so you won't go into any additional debt, and you'll gain teaching experience to boot (i do not recommend any programs you have to pay a single cent for unless you're filthy rich and bored). you'll write a thesis and go on to begin a life of words, be it reading the words of other people or writing your own.

so spend this time reading stuff and thinking about the stuff you read, writing some original work for a writing sample, and maybe sending that work out to some magazines. go meet with the creative writing faculty at your university and ask these questions to them as well. they'll give it to you straight about what your specific university's program is like and what it can offer you. even if you don't focus in cw, there are probably a ton of other extracurricular cw opportunities available to you, like working at the undergrad lit mag or attending readings.

[onp4012]

Pick a Card: How To Pick The Right Career

Choose one of the pictures from above to see how to pick the right career for you based off your energy. This reading is not meant to tell you “go do that” or “go do this”, so don’t take it word by word. Those are only suggestions. Some of them are long, some of them are short. All based on what I pick up.

feel free to suggest PAC ideas in the inbox!

Please like and reblog 〽️

Pile 1

9W, Hermit, 6C, Hanged Man, 6W, 7C

For this pile I’m getting that you have a couple career ideas in your head, but can’t decide which one will be the best choice (of course). I get a very artsy plan for you. I feel like the career which is the best for you is literally something you enjoy doing, something which pleases you. So whichever career you have on your list which makes you giggle, that’s the one for you. You might want to talk to your older siblings if you have older siblings.

This career you might consider unsuccessful or worthless is actually something which can help you become financially stable.

You might have the following ideas on the list: teacher, writer, dancer, singer/music composer, artist, pediatrician, farmer, nanny, anything with children, perhaps even children therapist, I’ve also heard nursing, so you might want to take into care people who can’t look after themselves. It seems you want to be someone people looking up to.

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Pile 2

Sun, 6C, 4W, 9C, 3S, 10W

You seem to be a bit care free about this at the moment and you aren’t looking for a job right away, but you want to know what you gotta do so you don’t enter a time crisis. Many of you who’ve chosen this pile seem to want to make people happy and you tend to radiate energy and happiness most of the times. Some of you seem to want to be vets or work with animals, maybe take care of animals full time. I heard “listen to your heart”. You have good judgement, but you have to trust yourself more into this side, yk? You and the first pile have similar energies so I believe you could’ve also chosen pile 1. Like pile 1, some of you might want to take care of children. I keep hearing “animator” for some reason.

Others of you seem to have faced a downfall recently and are now looking forward changing their lives once and forever. Now, this advice will sound like shit, but you gotta fail in order to reach success. You will probably try a career you believe will bring you money which you don’t really enjoy and find out later it’s not for you. The SECOND time you try will bring you a better career and better finances.

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Pile 3

4C, KOS, 10S, 9P, 3W, 7S

You need to get out, broaden your view and drop some of the career which don’t match you. Get to know yourself better before choosing something which you’ll do probably until retirement. Your list of ideas is too long, sorry, you’ll need to choose one in the end.

You need to inform yourself more and ask around people about different careers one can imagine. I get that some of y’all considered working in a mortuary field, others have thought about working at the cemetery, others have plans involving law and justice. So yeah, you need to inform yourself more onto this theme because it doesn’t seem you’ve found the career which “matches” you like a glove.

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Pile 4

8W, 7W, Justice, 9C, Moon, 10W

I’ve literally heard “go ask a teacher” and “go ask your parents”. I feel like you should go to your parents if you still live with them and ask them what career you should pick. you might need to make a list and list down what Uni you should follow later and what you’re good at (if you’re still in high school). Some of you thought about applying to law school which is really cool.

Now, for example, you might not know what you want to become after finishing law and you ask yourself “ok, now what should I do, what should I become?”, well you need to become something you will enjoy being. With all those wands here I believe something might pull you back from reaching your dream career, I feel like your parents or tutors might not agree with what you want to choose or what you’ve chosen.

I believe you’ve made the right decision if you’re following any type of career at the moment. You should really follow your dream career. It has chosen you for a reason. Some of you might be into one of those occult stuff and you’re not sure if you’ll have anymore time for it. You will have.

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Pile 5

World, 8P, Strength, QOW, QOC, 5W

Ah, pile 5, the last ones. I knew this was gonna come up. You are the opportunity chaser I believe. While chasing some opportunities, you’ll find something which will match your personality. The only thing you gotta do is run after different opportunities and listen to the messages the universe has for you. Some of you have considered becoming self employed or creating some sort of company (?) You have big dreams and hopes.

You will need to work a lot in order to make your dream career profitable. You can ask a friend for help or you can start something with a good friend of yours. Some of you have thought about collaborating with someone dear to you. I keep sending this “building” vibe. You gotta build your empire.

—————————————————

See you next time, bye👋🏻

[spanishskulduggery]

Hi! I'm very curious about something regarding the Spanish language. I'm currently studying A2 Spanish but I had this question and my teacher did not seem too willing to discuss it. Here it goes:

I know that Spanish has, something my Spanish teacher says, linguistic gender. I was wondering how do the people who don't align themselves with the gender binary (masculine and feminine) speak/write in it? I have read this article about Spanish speaking people from US adding "x" Or "@" and people from Argentina using "e" to make the words gender neutral.

Thank you so much for responding, whenever you get to it. Also love your blog. ❤

Short answer, in general speaking terms people are tending towards the -e now because the other two are very hard to actually speak, and because Spanish-speakers feel the -e is more authentic

What you're most likely to see in Spanish is masculine plural as the default, or in written things you might see todos y todas or like un/una alumno/a "a student", or like se busca empleado/a "employees wanted" / "looking for an employee"

If it's something official or academic you typically include both [todas y todas] or you go masculine plural [todos] unless it's specifically feminine plural

-

Related, linguistic gender applies to all things, not just people. Why is la mesa "table" feminine, but el libro "book" masculine? Just linguistic gender. I can tell you that most loanwords (that aren't people) in Spanish are masculine, and that there are certain words that come from Greek are masculine, and that -ista words are unisex most of the time... And I can tell you there are some words like testigo or modelo that are unisex and don't change for gender. Aside from that, speaking about nouns and grammatical gender... those particular things are harder to parse for regular people, but if you go into the field of linguistics you can explore that more deeply. Some of it is source language (i.e. "it came from Latin this way") or things like that. And in general when talking about nouns it's unimportant and not considered sexist, that's just how it is.

There is such a thing where it gets a little too far the other way and people will say "history? what about herstory" which is a nice thought but the etymology has nothing to do with gender there

When it comes to people - and when it comes to gendered attitudes - that's where it gets more confusing and more complicated.

I believe there was an experiment where people had French and Spanish speakers [I believe it was Spanish] try to identify how a "fork" would sound. French people gave it a more feminine voice because "fork" is feminine in French, while Spanish speakers gave it a more masculine voice because it's masculine in Spanish.

Whether we like it or not, certain gendered things do influence our thoughts and feelings and reactions. A similar thing in English exists where the old joke was something like "There was a car accident; a boy is rushed to the ER and the surgeon but the father was killed. When they got to the ER the doctor said 'I can't operate on him, he's my son!'" and it's like "well who could the doctor be?" ...and the doctor is his mother. We associate "doctor" as masculine and "nurse" as feminine.

There's a gender bias in our language thought patterns, even though the language changes. And that does exist in Spanish too, to different extents.

There are certain cultural and gendered stereotypes or connotations attached to certain words, many tend to be more despective or pejorative when it's women.

For example - and I know this has changed in many places or it isn't as prevalent - el jinete "horseman/rider", while the female form is la amazona "horsewoman/rider". Because la jinete or la jineta was sometimes "promiscuous woman".

There were also debates about things like la presidente vs. la presidenta or what the female version of juez should be, whether it should be la juez or la jueza

Most languages with gendered language have varying degrees of this, and all languages I'm aware of have gendered stereotypes related to professions or cultural attitudes in some way, and not just for women, and not all in the same way with some of them being very culturally based

-

The longer answer involves a bit of history, and I'll be honest, some of it is contested or considered a little controversial in Spanish-speaking countries particularly in the conservative parts (which honestly should come as no surprise)

The first symbol that I know of that came about was the X

First piece of contested history: As far as I know, it was the trans/queer and drag communities in Latin America who started the trend of X. When there were signs or bulletins that had the gendered endings - specifically masculine plural as the default plural - people would write a big X through the O. This was a way of being inclusive and also a very smash the patriarchy move.

Some people attribute this to women's rights activists which may also be true, but a good portion of the things I read from people say it was the trans/queer/drag communities in Latin America doing this.

I've also read it originated in Brazil with Portuguese; still Latin America, but not a Spanish-speaking country.

Where it's most contested is that some people will say that this trend started in the Hispanic communities of the United States. And - not without reason - people are upset that this is perceived as a very gringo movement.

That's why Latinx is considered a very American-Hispanic experience

-

The arroba (@) is relatively new. I remember seeing it in the 2000s. I don't know if it existed earlier for gender inclusivity.

People used it because it looks like a combination of O and A, so it was meant to be cut down on saying things like todos y todas or niños y niñas in informal written speech

I remember quite a few (informal) emails starting like hola tod@s or muy buenas a tod@s or things like that

I think of it more as convenience especially in the information age where you never knew who you were talking to and it's easier than including both words, especially when masculine plural might be clumsy or insensitive

Still, it's practically impossible to use the @ in spoken Spanish, so it's better for writing casually. You also likely won't be allowed to use the @ in anything academic, but in chatrooms, blogs, or forums it's an option

-

I love the E ending. And the gender neutral form in singular is elle... so it's él "he", ella "she", and elle "they (singular)"

The -e ending is I think became more common within the past 10 years though it might have existed longer than that. These sorts of changes tend to come from the queer or trans communities and tend to be more insular before becoming more of an outside thing that then the general population finds out about

It came about because there are some adjectives in Spanish that end in -e that are unisex. It's not an A, it's not an O, but it's something grammatically neutral for Spanish

It's not as awkward as X, and E exists very firmly in Spanish so it's not perceived as some outside (typically gringo) influence

The good news is, it's pretty widespread on the internet. Not so much in person (yet), but especially in Spain and Argentina at least from what I've seen, particularly in the queer communities and online culture.

The only issues with it are that for non-native speakers, you have to get used to any spelling changes. Like amigo and amiga, but to use the E ending you have to add a U... so it's amigue.

That's because there are certain words where you have to do spelling changes to preserve the sound; gue has a hard G sound like -go does [like guerra]... but ge has the equivalent of an English H sound [gelatina for example]. Another one is cómico/a "funny" which would go to cómique. Again, because co has a hard C/K sound, while ce is a soft sound more like an S or in some contexts TH/Z sound; like centro is a soft sound, while cola is a hard sound

Unless you make it to the preterite forms where you come across like pagué, alcancé, practiqué with those types of endings... or subjunctive forms, pague, alcance, practique ... Basically you'd have to be exposed to those spelling rules or you'd be really confused if you were a total beginner.

It all makes sense when you speak it, but spelling might be harder before you learn those rules

The other drawback is that the E endings are sometimes not applicable. Like in damas y caballeros "ladies and gentlemen" there's not really a gender neutral variation on that, it's all binary there. And while la caballero "female knight" does exist, you'd never see a male variation on dama; the closest I've ever seen is calling a guy a damisela en apuros "damsel in distress" in some contexts where the man needs rescuing, and it's feminine una/la damisela, and it's very tongue-in-cheek

There are also some contexts like jefe vs jefa where I guess you would say jefe for "boss" if you were going the neutral route, but it's a bit weird because it's also the masculine option.

I can't speak for how people might feel about those if they're non-binary or agender because every so often you kind of get forced into the binary whether you like it or not

I totally support the E, I just recognize there are some limitations there and it's quirks of the Spanish language itself

Important Note: Just to reiterate, E endings are the ones most Spanish-speakers prefer because it's easiest to speak and doesn't have the American connotation that X does in some circles

-

Where it gets very "Facebook comment section" is that you'll see many Latin Americans traditionalists and conservatives claim that "this is just the gringos colonizing our language" and "grammatical gender doesn't matter in Spanish". They'll say that the "gender movement" is an American feminist movement and that it's a gringo thing and doesn't reflect actual Latin Americans or Spanish-speakers

Which on the one hand, yes, English does have a lot of undue influence on other languages because of colonization, and American influence and meddling in Latin American politics is a big important issue

But as far as I'm aware of the X (and especially the E) were created by Latin Americans

The other issue I personally have is that any time this conversation comes up, someone will say something like somos latinOs and claim that masculine plural is gender neutral

To that I say, first of all, "masculine plural" is inherently gendered. Additionally, there is a gender neutral in Spanish but it's lo or ello and it's only used with "it" so it sounds very unfriendly to use on an actual person... and in plural it looks like masculine plural and everything applies like masculine plural

Second, the reason masculine plural is default is because of machismo. It's more important that we don't possibly misgender a man, so it has to be masculine plural. It's changed in some places, but growing up when I was learning Spanish, if it was 99 women and 1 man you still had to put masculine plural

I'm not opposed to there being a default, and I understand why it's easier to use masculine plural, but some people get very upset at the idea of inclusive language

...

In general, my biggest issues with these comments come when people act like non-binary/queer/trans people don't exist in Spanish-speaking countries, like English invented them somehow. So it's nice to see linguistic self-determination and seeing native speakers using the E endings.

[elizabethemerald]

Fall Anniversary at the Soltryce Academy

Caleb walked into his classroom at the Soltryce Academy with the immediate instinct that something was wrong. He had been teaching Transmutation theory and application in this same class room for the past twenty years, so anything that seemed different set off alarms in his head. 

He mentally checked the wards on the class room and found them intact. There were a few students in their seats, a few more filtering into the lecture hall, by the second. None of them seemed alarmed. Whatever was different today did not appear to be an immediate threat. 

Still just to be safe he subtly cast Detect Magic as he set his bag down and took off his coat. Immediately a few points were highlighted in his mind. Of course his own magical items, the amber around his neck and the amulet beside it, the ring on his finger, the chalk he had enchanted to help him lecture. Nothing off there. 

There were a few points of magic around the rest of the room, each quickly analyzed and dismissed. Transmutation magic on a small pile of coins near the wall, a low level student’s practice project. Abjuration magic in the wards along the walls. Divination magic in a button, another spying device Astrid had tried to sneak into his class room to keep him from teaching against the school’s policies. 

It was the illusion spells that caught his attention. A few of the students were covered in the same, linked illusion. Their appearance normal enough to blend in, but also entirely too normal for a real student. And there, a student he didn’t recognize even with his keen mind, covered in an illusion spell. Several other magical objects of varying power, hidden under the spell. The Vestige appeared to be within its pocket dimension, so at least they hadn’t brought a weapon onto campus. 

After setting down his things and greeting his class he squeezed past a few of the students to grab Astrid’s enchanted button. He quickly dispelled it and slipped it into an envelope to return to her later. As he returned to the front he gave the cat sitting on his desk a brief scratch. 

“Hello Jester.” He said. Of course he didn’t need Detect Magic telling him of the cat’s aura of Transmutation to know his friend. She was bright blue after all and staring at him far more smugly than even a magic fey cat would. 

“Now class, I know we were discussing transmutation principles as applied to effecting the elements around you, but I am afraid that lesson will have to be postponed. It would seem that it is the anniversary of the Mighty Nein getting together and they have decided to invite themselves to my class.”

There was a muttering around the class room as the students looked at each other, before one of them near the front stood up, the illusion dropping off her form as she did so. 

“I told you he wouldn’t fall for it!” Veth said in her high voice, She looked mostly unchanged from when they first brought her back to her proper body. A few more laugh lines, but nothing more to show the passing two decades. “Lebby, is an amazing wizard, he wouldn’t fall for something simple like that. You students better appreciate the skill of your teacher.”

Caleb smiled fondly as Veth walked up to the front to give him a hug. Interspersed through the seats a few more illusion spells dropped. A half elven man walked up from the front row and kissed him on the cheek. Essek’s own illusion lasting even as he dismissed the Seeming on Kingsley and Yasha. 

“How did they rope you into this?” Caleb whispered to Essek. 

“Oh you know I can’t resist a practical joke.” Essek maintained his deadpan delivery for only a few seconds before a small smile graced his lips. Caleb knew quite well that Essek looked as ageless as ever, under his illusion. His elven blood would keep him looking much the same for the next few centuries. Caleb returned the kiss, to the muttering of his students. They weren’t ever a 100% sure who Caleb’s rotating cast of elven boyfriends were, and Caleb was more than happy to keep them in the dark. 

“Well you can’t fault us for trying!” Kingsley said. They were wearing a scandalously low cut shirt, a pair of plain black pants, and a pair of thigh high boots. His purple hair was fading to a less vibrant shade just a bit near his ears and he had a larger collection of scars, as one would expect from years of piracy and being a bloodhunter. They were also wearing their sword much to Caleb’s disapproval, which was apparently not magical. 

“You can’t expect me to hide this glorious look without magic though can you?” He said, sliding his hands down to his hips then back up his torso. Then he grabbed Caleb’s chin and kissed him full on the mouth, with tongue for several seconds, while his students lost their collective minds. Caleb smiled against Kingsley’s lips right before the tiefling stepped back. He was sure the rumor mill of the school would go wild about that for a few weeks. He wished he could see the look on Master Beck’s face when the news came across her desk. “Here’s to another twenty years, magic man.”

Yasha and Caduceus walked up next, each giving Caleb a tight hug. These two showed their age the least of the non elven members of the Nine. Cad could have been just stepping out of the temple doors in the Blooming Grove, saying that he had only three cups, if it weren’t for the increased presence of lichens and mosses of all kinds on his clothes and armor. Caleb was fairly certain there was an actual bird’s nest in his pink hair. Yasha of course looked as badass and muscular as she had when they first found her. Her hair was completely white, done up in an ornate braid. Home life seemed to suit her well, she looked genuinely happy and relaxed like she certainly hadn’t when they had first gotten together. 

Fjord’s spell dropped as well. The half orc’s hair had large stripes of gray in it, he had crows feet at the corners of his eyes, and his salt and pepper beard had significantly more salt to it now. He still looked good, life at sea, despite its hardships, keeping him fit. He laughed at something over Caleb’s shoulder as he approached and he found himself lifted bodily into the air by a pair of muscular blue arms. 

Jester having dropped her polymorph spun him around briefly in the hug before setting him back on his feet. She would never fail to look divine. Her horns now curling in on themselves, almost like her mother’s had when they first met her. Her hair is pulled back into a pony tail, poofing out behind her head from the salt air. Her sailing days were certainly not hurting her in anyway. Her smile was still just as wide, her eyes just as sharp, and her arms just as strong, if not more so. 

“Happy anniversary Caleb! Twenty years ago you were a stinky wizard. Now you are here teaching!” Jester’s happiness in her voice carried to every corner of the lecture hall. 

“What happened to our plan of drinks in Nicodranas this evening?”

“I just couldn’t wait Cay-leb.” She pouted. “Fjord and I got into port early, and I was so bored.”

Caleb smiled at her, then looked around at the rest of the Nein, pretending to count. 

“We appear to be one short. Where is my sister? Couldn’t drag her away from the Cobalt training pit? Or did she get lost in a book like some kind of nerd?” Caleb said with a smirk.

“Mother fucker!” 

He looked up towards the voice above him, just in time to watch Beauregard drop from the ceiling, to land on his desk with a perfect three point landing. She hopped off the desk and punched his arm, before also grabbing him in a tight hug. 

“I am not a nerd, Widogast!” She snapped, a wide grin on her face. 

“Beauregard, please do not land on my desk. It was a gift and I don’t think it could bare too many impacts like that.” He stopped to look up at the vaulted ceilings of the class room. “Also, how did you get up there?”

If she had been invisible she would have tripped the wards on the class room. And if she had gone in the brief break between classes one of the early students would have noticed her and caused a stir. 

Beau took her turn to smirk. 

“I have been waiting up there for four hours so we could surprise you. It’s surprisingly comfortable. I could have gone another couple of hours without breaking a sweat.” She paused to flex, causing several students, and Yasha to blush at her muscles. 

Beauregard’s monk training meant that she looked like she hadn’t aged a day since Aeor. And she could still easily out fight everyone else in the room if she wanted to. She was also the one member of the Nein that Caleb saw the most frequently. Their work to root out corruption among the Cerberus Assembly, and other bodies of power in the Empire often kept them up together late into the night, until Yasha would intervene and throw her wife over her shoulder to carry her to bed. 

“Can I finish the lesson, or should we depart immediately?” Caleb asked, already guessing the answer. 

“Cayyyllleeeb.” Jester groaned, pulling at her face. “I’m sooooo bored. I want to drink and party already!”

Caleb turned back to his class of students. He was sure most of them had heard rumors about Professor Widogast and the wild adventures he got up to with the Mighty Nein back when they first got together. He wasn’t sure how much they actually believed, but he was sure that even the most widely blown out of proportion tale didn’t even begin to cover the truth of what they had done together. 

“In honor of the anniversary of this group of arschlochs finding each other, consider this to be a free day. Keep up on your readings, and if you have any questions I will be at my regular office hours tomorrow morning.” 

The students immediately started buzzing as they stood and packed. No doubt during tomorrow’s class he would have to field a whole host of questions about the Nein, and that was just the way he liked it. The day after the anniversary was the one day he would talk about what his family had done. As the class filtered out, with many a lingering glance thrown at the colorful group at the front, Caleb turned to Essek, setting the envelope with Astrid’s button in it on the table top to deal with later. 

“Would you like to teleport us to the beach, or shall I?”

Essek put up both hands. 

“I already used my spell slots getting us all back together again. You can bring us to the coast.” Essek said, his smile a mix between smug and fond. 

Caleb rolled his eyes before pulling him into a soft kiss. Then he turned to address the rest of the Nein. The family he had made for himself. 

“Are we ready?” After a series of nods, he pulled an ancient clay turtle from his pocket and gave it a squeeze. “Then let’s go!”

And they were off, to a night of drinks and celebration and stories told, and memories shared. And of course many toasts, “To another twenty years.”

[creativesparksart]

We interrupt our regularly scheduled art posts, for a rant on Introductory Level Classes in College & Advanced Classes in High Schools

***Disclaimer – this is largely based on my personal experience and the experience of those around me. I know this probably isn’t the case everywhere, but its still worth being shared***

1.      For any high schoolers out there, here’s a tip from your friendly college senior who was an overachiever “gifted kid”TM  in high school and is about to enter the field of education: All of your teachers who every told you that your grades are the most important thing for getting into college and insanely overworked you in advanced courses because “that’s what college is like” is so incredibly full of shit. I spent years of my life having so much sleep deprivation that I did not dream for like two years because I was struggling to balance all advanced classes, travel sports and school sports, a stupid number of clubs, two honor societies, later a job, and let’s not forget whatever family drama wants to join in on the parade. I graduated high school 4th in my class with a fucking 4.54 GPA and you know what has done literally nothing for me in college? Any of that crap. I applied and got rejected from Princeton and ultimately chose my university for the price and that I could graduate with a Bachelors in History and a Masters in Education since I was going into a shitty paying career path (teaching high school). You know how all that hell I went through with overloading my schedule in high school? My first semester at college I was actually BORED. I was confused at the concept of having free time and the ability to get enough sleep that I didn’t know what to do with myself. I had time for art, I had so many things that I could do for fun that I never had time to do in high school because I spent it “being prepared for college.” WHAT. THE. ACTUAL. FUCK.

2.      Now, I wish I could say that was my entire college experience, however, there are still college professors out there who are definitely the ones that set the stereotype your high school teachers believe all college professors are like. And I hate them. The further and further I get through the education major (and mind you, I’m in graduate courses now), the more you notice how full of shit some of your professors are. The biggest pet peeve I have are how some college professors approach Introductory level classes.

A little PSA for Professors and Teachers: INTRO LEVEL COURSES SHOULD NOT BE A FILTER THROUGH WHICH TO WEED OUT THE WEAK, ESPECIALLY IF IT IS PART OF GENERAL EDUCATION REQUIREMENTS. NEWS FLASH: THAT’S NOT TEACHING, THAT’S GATEKEEPING.

I am not saying I want students to be able to breeze through the course and get an easy A. But what I am saying is that if you are going into a class like French 101, the first level of learning French, they should not be expecting you to hold a conversation in French by the end of the semester. You should not walk in on day one and be terrified that you walked into a refresher class for French 202. You should also not be terrified out of your wits to take an introductory Chemistry class required for your major in GEOLOGY because everyone has told you the professor makes the class awful to prepare you for the rest of the major. We go to school to LEARN. I went to a goddamn liberal arts college so I could do the gen ed program and take some classes that interested me outside of my major to LEARN and push myself.  I didn’t come to relive the hell that was cramming for a Biology SOL and taking it on test day and learning that your teacher had skipped the unit on evolution because “oh yeah, we didn’t get to that.” I didn’t take a science class to get the whole question wrong and no partial credit, not because I got the soil layers wrong, but because I perfectly listed the soil layers for Virginia which we were TAUGHT and not North Carolina – which we were NOT taught. History and other Bachelors of Arts classes are no better. We constantly put students through intense 100 and 200-level courses that are required to get them to their major classes, and again the courses are made artificially difficult and work and reading intensive. My high school history teacher told me when he was in college, he had to read 8 books a week for ONE of his history classes. That is asinine.

I hate this stupid idea that a 4 year university intro level course – you know, the university you already had to apply to get into and get weeded out from thousands of other applicants, needs to be hard so that it weeds “the weak” students out from aggressive fields like the sciences. Why do we hurt our students who just want to push themselves into a different field for a General Education requirement and explore Chemistry because they liked their high school chemistry class? Why do we treat our honors students like shit and decide they don’t need study guides or help because “well its an honors class”? We go to college to learn and explore! We should not be punished for wanting to explore, and we sure as hell should not be scared out of a major just because some professor thinks we need to handle a 40% on a midterm to prove we deserve to help people. Are you telling me I don’t deserve to be a pediatric nurse because I couldn’t remember the exact chemical equation of a compound? I can’t be a history teacher because I can’t remember the exact year the radio was invented. I have been pushed away from exploring topics I find interesting and wanted to learn more about from Human Anatomy to Costume Design because of the horror stories of the experiences that people have had. And at the same time, I hear professors and teachers complaining that students don’t want to do the work anymore and that so many of them are failing classes because they don’t put enough time and energy into the class.

The vast majority of students, want to learn. Even amidst the hellscape pandemic and virtual classes that have affected the bulk of my undergraduate learning, I have always wanted to learn. Its not fair to students or to the later professors that would have loved to have those students in their classrooms to discuss a shared love of genetics, or Medieval History, etc. to gatekeep your field or make your test obscenely difficult just because you want to “prepare students for reality.” ESPECIALLY when we are getting quite the unhealthy dose of reality with the major historical events and crises we’ve been dealing with thank  you very much. I didn’t put myself in thousands of dollars of debt in student loans to be in tears at 3 AM trying to cram for an exam that I know I’ll still feel unprepared for, but my anxiety won’t let me sleep and I got off work at 10 to be told by a professor that I didn’t study hard enough.

fuck this toxic mentality, and I will do everything in my power as a teacher to dismantle this bullshit

[dreaming-about-fanfictions]

Choose Me Instead II Draco Malfoy x Reader II Chapter 5 of 27: You

Summary: Pretending to be in a relationship with Draco Malfoy to get back at your ex might have not been the smartest idea you ever had. Especially during your last year of Hogwarts where you should be focusing on exams and your future plans. However, you were just pretending. There was no way in hell you could actually catch feelings for someone like Malfoy. … Right?

CHAPTER 4

A/N: A chapter from a different perspective! I hope you all like it <3 And thank you so much for your support!! I love you all so muuuuuch!!!

Words: 2300 Pairing: Draco Malfoy x female!Reader, post-war Warnings: none

Draco Malfoy wasn’t easy to impress. Being bored quickly by other people was one reason why he never had many close friends – and yes, he knew how utterly arrogant that sounded. It was the truth however. He was friendly with most of the Slytherins but his mother always taught him “Quality over quantity” and he agreed. Draco went so far as to apply that mindset to his love life as well. Yes, before the sixth year of school, he used to like to flirt and he had dated the occasional Slytherin girl. He was also very aware of the fact that there had been quite a few girls with crushes on him. In some cases, he even reciprocated them, however, those feelings faded quickly.

So you couldn’t imagine how much it bothered Malfoy that he wasn’t able to stop thinking of you. Not even in his dreams did you leave him alone and so he kept on going back to that evening on the Quidditch field. Until today, it was entirely unclear to him why he told you all those things. He didn’t know anything about you yet speaking to you left him feeling … good, almost. After a year of trials and coming home to find his family and life in shambles, there was no one left to talk to. No one he wanted to talk to. To whom was he going to turn? His friends which were all coming from the same pureblood Death Eater families? Yes, of course, they understood – and also they didn’t. Not quite. Did you understand him? Probably not, he guessed. After all, you were a Gryffindor and fought on the right side of the war. The winning side. But talking to you felt different, almost easy. You grew up in another world than him and maybe that was the key to it all.

Obviously, Draco didn’t plan on repeating that evening. You were friends with the whole Potter and Weasley bunch. It made it even harder to trust you – how could he be sure you hadn’t already told your Gryffindor friends and were laughing about him behind his back? It was possible. A part of him didn’t want to believe this possibility and another part reminded him of all the times he was disappointed and got hurt by the people around him. It was probably for the best to stay away from you.

Yet he didn’t stop thinking of you. He saw you looking at him in the Great Hall during meals, watched you from walk away when you passed him in hallways and the library. Without noticing it, he always chose a place behind you in class. Draco didn’t understand the urge to be close to you. It was utterly ridiculous for Merlin’s sake. You were a Gryffindor; one of the good ones. He wasn’t. Not at all.

Maybe it was because of the kiss, he wondered at some point. Maybe you hexed him in this moment. Draco knew this theory was very far-fetched but it was the only logical explanation fin his mind. Why else would he keep thinking back to that moment in the storage room? He didn’t deny that you were witty and smart and very beautiful – he wasn’t blind after all – but so were lots of girls. What the hell was so special about you that you wouldn’t leave his thoughts?! It couldn’t be your taste in men as you obviously didn’t have any. At least there wasn’t a reasonable explanation for him for why someone like you would get with someone like the Weasel.

“Draco,” Blaise’s voice pulled him out of this thoughts. “You coming?”

Draco nodded. “Yeah, just a second.”

He got up from the table in their shared dorm, putting his notebook in the drawer of his nightstand. Two months since school started and he had almost filled in all of its pages. Draco started writing during the first trial of his parents last year. It kept him focused and helped him put his thoughts in order. It soon became a daily ritual which helped him stay grounded. Draco carried it around in his bag during the day, using it in between classes and meals. His friends caught him doing it a lot and he was sure they had already guessed what it was. He was glad when they didn’t say anything because in the end, Draco would have rather died before admitting that he was using a diary.

“You’re not wearing a costume!”, Astoria exclaimed when he joined the others in the common room. Pansy, Blaise, Theodore and the Greengrass sisters were already waiting for him.

There was a Halloween party happening in the Room of Requirements tonight and his friends had convinced him to go even though it meant more awkward conversations with Astoria.

“I thought we’re not doing muggle traditions. What are you supposed to be?”, he asked instead, taking in her revealing outfit.

She giggled. “I’m a healer. Or ‘nurse’ as the muggles call it.”

“Ah,” Draco made, thinking that she didn’t look like a healer at all. “I thought Halloween was supposed to be scary?”

Astoria rolled her eyes, before linking their arms with each other. “You’re no fun. Don’t you think I look pretty?”

“Astoria, you can wear a potato sack and still look absolutely stunning.”

That answer seemed to satisfy her and they started making their way towards the exit of the common room. Draco glanced at her from the side. She was, objectively speaking, the perfect match for a Malfoy. Coming from a well-respected and wealthy pureblood family combined with her intelligence and beauty, she was everything his parents could have wanted for him. Especially now.

You had told him what to do. It was such a simple solution to all of his impending problems. However, it had been the moment where Draco had realized that you grew up differently. Not a day went by where he didn’t receive a heartbreaking letter from his mother. He knew, she just wanted the best for him and she didn’t want to manipulate him; she was simply desperate. Desperate for the live they used to have – a husband at home, a son with a promising future, money and a respected place in society.

Draco had asked himself countless times what the marriage would truly mean. His family would have another chance. Together with Astorias family, his future was secured. A good job, maybe even in the ministry if he was lucky. Enough money to take care of his mother. Who knew, maybe his father would be out of Azkaban sooner? Draco marrying Astoria would lessen his families suffering, that was for sure. But did he want that? Did he want a simple and easy solution to make their past crimes … disappear? His family was far from innocent. They had committed horrible crimes in the name of the Dark Lord – and a part of him knew, they deserved everything they got in the end. Hell, he wouldn’t have been surprised if they sent his mother and him to Azkaban as well.

When thinking about the engagement, another thought popped into his head. Could he learn to love Astoria? Would he be happy with her? Maybe. Maybe not. Draco knew only one thing for sure – there was a reason why he kept resisting to the whole idea. Giving in felt like sacrificing another part of himself to something his family had burdened him with.

“And Astoria, I disagree,” Blaise once again disrupted his train of thought by joining in from the right. “Draco can quickly make his costume appear. Just roll up your sleeves, Dray, and the Gryffindors will shit their pants on the spot.”

The rest of the group snickered but Draco didn’t react. Instead he suppressed the urge to touch the mark on his left arm and shoved his hand deeper into the pocket of his pants.

 ***

The Room of Requirement was absolutely crowded.

The Slytherins were surprised by how many people had actually appeared. Almost everyone from the sixth and seventh grade was here, wearing mostly ridiculous costumes. Music roared from invisible speakers, students were dancing and talking loudly.

“I’m surprised that the teachers didn’t already break this up,” Blaise almost had to shout. “Or Filch.”

Draco shrugged. “I feel like they stopped caring this year.”

“Maybe they feel responsible for all those deaths,” Theo suggested.

“So to make up for all the trauma, they allow us to party?”, Blaise concluded with an amused undertone.

“It’s good for us though so stop talking and start drinking,” Pansy chirped and grabbed Draco and Theo by their arms, pulling them towards the table with a few questionable bottles.

When his friends started chatting about the usual Hogwarts gossip, Draco’s eyes started to wander. He was searching the crowd for someone. You. Were you here? Did you even like parties? Draco had no idea. You always looked quite social from what he witnessed.

And there you were – standing in a group of people, listening to Granger who was gesticulating wildly. You were holding a drink and laughing at whatever the other girl told you. Draco noticed from across the room how your eyes were gleaming, your face red from the alcohol. You looked so careless. He swallowed hard at the sight.

“He’s either staring at Weasley, the mudblood or Y/L/N,” Zabini said to the others in that moment. “Don’t know what’s worse.”

Draco needed a second to understand his friends were talking about him. “What did you just say?” He turned to them.

Zabini grinned widely at him. “I said, you’re staring at the Gryffindors again, Draco. It’s fucking weird. What’s your sudden obsession with them?”

Draco quickly glanced at the rest of his friends. Daphne, Theodore and Pansy watched the two of you with a smirk on their lips, maybe even suppressing a giggle. Astoria looked at Draco with a worried expression.

“No, what did you just say?”, Draco repeated his question, straightening up slightly. “What did you call Granger?”

Blaise snorted. “What?”

Draco just stared at him.

“I called her a mudblood,” Blaise gave a half shrug.

“Yeah, what the fuck, Blaise,” Draco spat out.

“Come on, Dray,” Theodore tried to intervene. “It’s no big deal.”

“It is!” He looked at him, visibly disgusted.

“What’s your problem, Draco?”, Blaise raised an eyebrow, shifting from one leg to another. “You called her a mudblood for years and now you suddenly have a problem with it? You’re acting so weird this year, seriously.”

Before Draco was able to reply, Astoria carefully placed her hand on his arm. It took all the strength he had, not to immediately shake her off. “Come on,” she said softly. “Let’s get you a new drink and calm down.” She pulled him a few steps away from the group.

Draco gritted his teeth, remembering what he had thought about not being able to talk to his old friends. They understood – and also they didn’t.

“Are you okay, Draco?” Astoria asked, still looking slightly alarmed.

Draco looked at her. Did she want to hear an honest answer? “Sure,” he finally said.

She didn’t buy it. “You’ve been acting strange for a while now.”

“I’m really not.”

“Draco,” she reached for his hand. “I know you.”

He sighed and rubbed his eyes with his free hand. “Can we … can we not talk about this now? Here? With all these people around us?”

“There’s always a reason not to talk so we might as well do it here,” she pressed on.

Draco could think of a thousand different things he’d rather do than talk to her right now. “I’m … I’m not acting strange. It’s just a lot. With my parents and all that.”

Her smile changed from worried to pity. “I understand.” Did she? “That’s why I think we should move on.”

What kind of weird reaction was this? “Move on?”, Draco frowned.

“With our engagement.”

“Right.”

Astoria squeezed his hand. “I don’t see why we can’t just make it official.”

Draco looked at her fingers as if he was searching for a ring that he had forgotten existed. “Because the whole thing isn’t official yet,” he slowly said.

The brunette let go of his hand. “It’s going to happen anyways. My parents won’t stop talking about it and I bet it’s no different for your mother.”

Draco just wanted to get out of this situation. He got dragged here and now it was just one big argument. Why couldn’t they have stuck to gossiping and partying? “Why during school though?”

He saw how Astoria stared at the ground for a moment. When she started speaking again, her voice had become a little colder. “You know, there are a lot of men who would jump at this opportunity. My family is well respected and yours is …”

Draco let out a short whistle. “Thanks, Astoria,”

Astoria was visibly uncomfortable and Draco wondered if she regretted what she had just said. “That’s not how I meant it and you know that, Dray. I just don’t understand why this takes you so long.”

Draco put his hands on hips, pushing his jacket back. “Excuse me if I’m wrong,” he started, “But I’m not exactly your first choice either, am I?”

The girl didn’t answer right away. When she did though, Draco wanted to laugh at the sheer absurdity. “It’s not about what I want. It’s about what my parents want. Pureblood marriages will happen less and less in the future so we will be a good union.”

“Right,” Draco mumbled with a sad smile. It’s all about the family.

Astoria cleared her throat. “Well, are there any reasons why we shouldn’t move on?”

“Yes, there are.”

This didn’t come from Draco or Astoria. Irritated by the sudden interruption, he turned around to see who had so rudely eavesdropped on the conversation.

You.

***

A/N: Even though I wrote this, I really felt for Draco in this chapter. His life (like so many other characters lives in HP) is so f****** up. Sorry but I can’t find a better word for it. Poor Draco. Anyways - I hope you liked it!! I’d love to hear what you think <3 I love reading your comments *-* (if you don’t comment or do anything, it’s fine, don’t worry, I just love to read your thoughts <3)

CHAPTER 6

“Choose Me Instead”-Masterlist HP-Masterlist

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[sometimes-men-need-help-too]

What does modern feminism do that you don't agree with? This is genuine btw

A couple things before I start: 

- This is not meant to bash all the feminists out there unless they fit into what I’m saying. I know there are good feminists out there 

- When I say ‘you’ I’m not meaning you, I’m saying it in a general way 

-I hope I get my point across and it’s clear. I sometimes struggle with that 

Also I’m sorry this is so long and it’s in no particular order and I hope none of this comes across as being aggressive or anything

~~ 

A lot of my issues with the movement boils down to attitudes. To me, that is very telling of its true colors. And I do try not to necessarily judge an entire movement from just the bad people because I know that isn’t fair, although I do feel like the bad feminists have taken over the movement and end up drowning out the good voices and that’s why we hear more negativity than positivity. 

One thing that I have issue with the lack of respect towards those that disagree whether it’s with the movement itself or it’s a particular thing. For a movement that preaches about a woman’s choice, I don’t feel that really happens like it should. I don’t know, maybe I’m wrong here but depending on what the topic is I get a general impression like you’re not really supposed to disagree with what’s being side. You do and you might have someone lash out at you (that’s another point I have). Or if you say you’re anti feminist, you have people coming up with these reasons why they think you are; one being internalized misogyny  and you get called a pick-me which I find a bit insulting.  I should be able to have an opinion without someone assuming I’m trying to get a man’s attention or I can’t think for myself or I hate other girls. That isn’t it! Wouldn’t you think that is misogynistic? 

And if it’s not  internalized misogyny, then there are other factors; her being white (which usually then goes on to sound racist)  or it’s because she has money or  internalized racism or whatever they come up with. And it sounds condescending and that just bugs me. Hey, maybe instead of some underlying reason, we just don’t agree. 

or you have people try to stick the label on anyway. 

‘If you believe in equality you’re a feminist’

The label means nothing. I don’t understand why some will focus on this so much. I don’t want to be called a feminist. I don’t need to. In the same way, it’s not necessary for me to refer to myself as an MRA (men’s rights activist). And yeah, I know this says it’s an “MRA blog” that’s what I had when I started. But ultimately, the label isn’t important. I’m all for equality. It’s cool, it’s great. But I see this sort of thing (online that is) being forced on people and the thing is, with that wording it makes it sound like the movement is all inclusive when it’s not. You have to have certain politics and for the most part (unless you’re a religious feminist) you have to be pro choice otherwise you’re not a ‘real’ feminist. 

My next issue is all the aggression. You can just tell sometimes with how people respond online or if you catch a video that someone posted. And not only that, but how quickly people fall into name-calling or just all around acting like a child. And for the most it seems pretty acceptable to some because it keeps happening. It’s not hard to find on this site or otherwise. If you can’t communicate your opinions about something without having a fit or blocking someone (excluding if they just keep harassing you) then you’re not mature enough. That shows me you don’t really care about having a real discussion. And some can say that it happening on here is probably done by teenagers and to an extent they’re probably right. But it happens on other sites and in real life as well and it’s more than just teens. It’s people my age and older and that’s not cool. 

And then we have  how some like to ignore the differences between men and women. Sure, yes, there are many things a woman can do just like a man but we also have to acknowledge our differences.  I don’t see a lot of that with some forms of feminism. STEM, for example, is something I would attribute the differences more to just how men and women tend to be rather than sexism. Could there be certain circumstances where it is sexism? Sure, I suppose you can’t rule it out entirely. Otherwise I would say it’s just what they’re happy doing. I know girls who are doing science stuff or business things but I also know girls who are going to be teachers or psychologists or nurses. It’s not that they're actively being told by everyone that they can’t do it(I suppose unless they live in some other country like that). That’s just what they want to do, you know, their choice. Just like how some men go towards a job like with computers or farming or they’re pre-school teachers or gynecologists.

 I found an interesting fact (source will be posted below) that said women are actually preferred over men two-to-one for faculty positions. The study was done by psychologists from Cornell University with professors from 371 colleges/universities in the US. It also noted that: “recent national census-type studies showing that female Ph.D.s are disproportionately less likely to apply for tenure-track positions, yet when they do they are more likely to be hired, in some science fields approaching the two-to-one ratio revealed by Williams and Ceci.” 

Yet, we need to ask ourselves honestly, how often do facts like these get passed around vs the idea that women are suffering from misogyny and therefore are unable to fully represent in STEM jobs? 

The next thing I want to address is misandry. Now there are a good portion of people who don't think it exists or if it does, it's really not much of an issue because of the "power" and the "privilege" men have within society. And to me, I have a problem with that. If feminism is supposed to be for men as well, I would think they would want to combat misandry as well as misogyny. If someone really doesn't think it exists, I would suggest that the person really take a look at what goes on in real life and online that's directed towards men.

There's the whole "male tears" thing which is on coffee mugs and t-shirts. There's the kill all men/yes all men thing. All of which are supposed to be jokes and if a man says something about it he gets mocked for his "fragile masculinity"

That's just not okay. They're being immature and a bully which they usually try to justify (men have done this and that throughout history to women) but you just can't.

I found this article, this really really atrocious article. It's one of those open letter things and found on this feminist website (feminisminindia) and I almost believed it to be satire with how.... stereotypically Tumblr it was. I did research and looked at the info regarding the site and nope, it's a serious site. I'll post the article below but I'll also summarize it:

Basically this woman is telling the men in her life that she will not stop saying "men are trash or other radical feminist opinions." She's saying it because women and others have suffered so much at the hands of the patriarchy because they're not straight white men. She goes on to say:

So let’s establish: misandry isn’t real. Just like unicorns and heterophobia, misandry is a myth because it isn’t systematic or systemic. Unlike misogyny, cis men don’t face oppression purely based on their gender. While they may encounter instances of racism, homophobia and ableism, they are not dehumanised as a function of their gender identity (read: cis privilege).

That is wrong. Absolutely wrong. Misandry is real. "Cis" people do face oppression purely based on their gender. Anyone can. To deny that lacks understanding.

And the rest is just saying that: It is time to start hating on men-as-a-whole and starting celebrating the men that you are.

And: Because at the end of the day, feminists need men. Whether it’s because you wield structural power or because we genuinely value your existence, we need to band together to destroy ‘men’ because men are trash, but you, if you made it to the end of this, are probably not. Prove me right.

I would imagine this is a common viewpoint. And it's not a good one. If you genuinely think a whole group as a whole is bad you need to reexamine your thoughts. It's not "men" that are bad, it's the sexist people.

To wrap this up (I'm sure you might be tired of reading this lol); like I said, the attitudes play a huge part of it. Modern feminism, in my opinion, is just not good enough for me to say I agree with it and want to identify as one. I just can't

Here is the link to the feminist article: https://www.google.com/amp/s/feminisminindia.com/2020/09/23/men-are-trash-and-other-radical-feminist-opinions/%3famp

And here is the link for the STEM thing: https://news.cornell.edu/stories/2015/04/women-preferred-21-over-men-stem-faculty-positions

[insufferablelust]

Pretty Little Thing, (I)

Hi! i’m back to bring new mini series i’ve been working on during my hospital stay! i hope you wnjoy this! and give me your feedbacks! thank you.

Warnings : this series will be filled with Adult content, upcoming smut, murder, psychotic behaviors, dark kinks, traumatic events, manipulation, gaslighting, and isolation. It started out as Professor!Spencer x Reader, but it’ll progress to Spencer Reid x Unsub!Reader. WITH PLOT TWIST heheh, enjoy.

MASTERLIST.

——————

Y/A/N was never the one to rush into classes, she always took her time and were never late. She’s the epitome of perfect straight A’s student, many teacher’s pet. And to say that she has a lot of people who would want to see her struggle was an understatement, one of those people would be Spencer Reid.

Weird to imagine a professor who would want to see his student fail, yet something about her irked Spencer beyond belief. Maybe it’s the natural tension between them ever since she walked into criminal psychology, most of his students were either had a slight interest on the subject or just on him— but Y/A/N she seemed to have an interest on both. The moment she stepped into his class, he was intrigued by her, not just her outstanding beauty but also the way she responds, her body language and her overall demeanor.

Spencer was aware that she was your typical good girl, but something about the glint in her eyes just doesn’t settle well with the good girl esque that she was portraying. There was something much darker about her, that much he knew— being a profiler and an iq of 187 would tell him that, but this time it was his guts talking to him. She raised her hand almost every time he asked questions to his class, even when he thought it was a rhetorical question. She managed to frustrate him in ways he gets so fed up that he needed to do some research on who she was. Truly.

And what he had found might as well killed him on sight, digging through files of her faces, confusion rake over his brain like storms. Initially, he was going to do some background check, maybe she turned out to be a child prodigy just like him. But what he found shattered his every thought, There she was, with different hair styles and colors, different contact lenses, styles, her various names scattered through tons of criminal data bases.

Spencer gulped as he saw her amongst the women affiliated with Cat Adams, the woman who put him in jail, the woman who irked him to no end just like Y/A/N now. His eyes kept on glazing over the files on Garcia’s laptop, tying her to more evidence that she was in fact not the girl everyone thought she was— god how old even is she? She’s good at hiding, and he knows it.

“Well genius, have you finished stalking that fellow super genius student of yours?” Garcia popped her head back inside her bat-cave as she carried two mugs, one over sugared coffee and one tea for her. As she sat down, she finally realized that Reid was pale— as in ‘horrified’ looking pale.

“Reid, hey what did you—“ Penelope left her jaw open when she finally saw the two matching photos from the face recognition program of a uni student and next to it was a wanted assassin named,

“Y/N Y/l/N...” Spencer beat Garcia on saying her name, the only thing in his mind was ‘Y/N, Y/N, Y/N’ his head spinning as he tried to rake through his brain, trying to find a reason why he didn’t recognized a wanted assassin- Cat’s close relations in his class. He finally looked up to a seemingly horrified Garcia and muttered a pained, “We have to tell the team.”

—————

“The Unsub is 24 years old Y/N Y/l/N, She has been under the radar since Catherine Adams’s arrest back in 2015, we believed that she is one of the Hit woman working alone with Cat at the time of her arrest even going as far as recent.” Prentiss placed her hand inside her pants pocket as she looked at Tara to continue the profile which being given to FBI agents as well as International crime task force. Her eyes then flickered to Spencer, which seemed to be occupied by the face recognition photos still.

“She’s a very well trained assassin, she was taught to manipulate, to hide in plain sight, and most likely is multilingual.” Tara continued,

“She’s a dangerous serial killer, her targets has always been men with higher status, She’s narcissistic, most likely misandristic, and psychopathic.”

“We believed that she hasn’t been killing in over 2 years, but now started again because her partner was executed few months ago.” JJ took a deep breath as she continued after Alvez,

“Cat Adam’s execution is her stressor, she knows we’ll find her, that’s why she risked on changing her identity to Y/A/N, a student of SSA Spencer Reid. We have every reason to believe that he’s her next target which makes her our primary target, and now that she have our attention, let’s get her before she continue her plans.” Prentiss finished, nodding off to the field agents, before turning back up to the meeting room where Reid was.

“Reid you know that—“

“How can i not recognized her? we profiled her years ago, she was in one of Cat’s list, and how did i missed it?” Spencer stresses, hands gripping the table tightly and breathing heavily.

“Listen to me, you found her, you knew something was wrong and you followed your guts, and we will get her Reid.”

—————

Y/N delicately put on the white knee high socks before slipping into her converse and slip her pocket knife onto the small strap on her thigh— smiling at herself as she applied the pink lipgloss then grabbed her bag and head out to campus. She looked over her watch excitedly as she realized who’s class she’s going to spend the first period at.

She parked her car on the usual spot as she preparing to get out, but something caught her eyes just before she opened her car door,

FBI Agents, everywhere. Her eyes widened as she hurriedly presses the reverse pedal and returned to the way where she first came, hoping none of those agents could realized that was her car.

————

I let out a frustrated scream as i went as far as the gas pedal would allow me to in this godforsaken traffic, my mind race back to the campus that was swarmed with Agents, to other people that might blend in like college kids— but not to me, the earpiece their glasses, and years of hiding from them has taught me well.

“Fucking Adams!” I punched the steering wheel when the red clouded my vision, my knuckles all bruised and my hair out of place. This is not how its supposed to go, i was supposed to be Y/A/N not the Y/N who cat claimed to be an assassin. She could still control my life even from underneath her grave, i chuckled as i sped up down the highway to the one place i could release all of my anger at.

As soon as i reached Cat and I’s old place, i can’t help but to tear the whole place down, smashing every piece of furniture i could lay my eyes and hands on, screaming on top of my lungs and let myself be numb to the pain of the sharp glass nick and slice through my skin.

After i’m sure there’s nothing left to break, i sat on my knees— feeling the hardwood floors dig through my skin and cried as loud as i can. “You fucking bitch, stop destroying my fucking life!”

“Y/N Y/l/N put your hands on the air and hand us your weapon!”

——————

Taglist is open! just message me or leave me an ask!

upcoming fics : the artist and his muse (vii), and few requests that i’m working on.

Thank you for your patience for the past few days, hopefully things will get better soon and i can be more productive!❤️

[bunnies-on-saturn]

You’re a good big brother

so i had a thought where like, AU (i guess?) where the brothers went to one of those K-12 schools. You know where they have all the grades in school, yeah I feel like they went to one of those. either to be closer together, for it to be convenient, so Lucifer can watch his brothers whatever it may be. By the way I’ve never been in one of those school so no idea how it works.

~Story Summary~:

Lucifer, while in class, gets called into the schools office to talk about Mammon behavior. Apparently he’s been getting in more fights. Lucifer is upset but maybe there’s more to the story than what the teachers know. He’s only doing it to protect his little brothers.

~Characters~:

Lucifer: possibly around the age of 15-17 (the oldest obviously)

Mammon: around 8-10 years old

Leviathan: around 5-6 years old

Asmodeus: 3-4 years old (the youngest. At least for now)

Lucifer sat in the middle of class listening to the teacher’s lecture. Well half listening, he was a good student who followed the rules and got good grades but he sat by the window so it was easy to get distracted. Currently the class was taking notes but he had already written down the information, so he was doodling in the corner of his paper. He was drawing his little brothers. They all went to the same school, but just different classes.

It was a K-12 school and each “level” as they called it was divided into different sections of the school. Each grade level had their own building in a way. Elementary kids got one side, middle schoolers another and high schoolers took the last building. They all shared one big field they shared for certain school events, but things like playground equipment, cafeterias, and etc where all in their own building. They did share a bus stop for all the kids however.

Every day Lucifer would take his brothers to the elementary building, being younger and all and; then go to the high school school building. Then after school he’d pick them up and they’d walk home together. They never took the bus, they liked the walk. Their house wasn’t far anyways. The room was quiet as the only few sounds where pencils writing as the teacher wrote more on the whiteboard. That was until foot steps could be heard walking out in the hallway.

There was a knock on the door causing everyone to look up. “Come in.” Lucifer’s teacher called. The door opened and it was the assistant principal of the elementary department. While yes it was a big school it had only one principal but each section had their own association principal. “Hi sorry to interrupt but we need Lucifer Lamentation to come to office please.” The lady said as she smiled at the teacher. Everyone looked over at Lucifer making an “oooo” sound causing Lucifer to get embarrassed and turn a bit red in the cheeks.

(I know that’s not their last name. I don’t even think they have a last name. I just took the name of the house and applied that as their last name.)

Lucifer turned away as he snarled a bit. The assistant principal walked over to him, “Please bring your stuff with you just in case.” She said. Now Lucifer was a bit worried. He didn’t seem in trouble. He hadn’t done anything so that possibly was ruled out. Did something happen concerning him? Did something happen to his little brothers? Lucifer packed up his things before meeting up with the assistant at the door.

“Lucifer you have the homework for tonight right?” His teacher called right as they where about to leave. “Yes sir.” Lucifer replied. His teacher smiled, “Good. Off you go then.” And with that they closed the door and left. The two walking down the empty hall, the sound of her high heels tapping the floor echoing through the hall. Lucifer fixed his backpack on his shoulder before speaking. “Did something happen?”

“Well.” She said. “Mammon has been getting into some arguments recently with some kids. Today however, Mammon got into a fist fight with one of the kids. So now he’s in the office and I wanted you to try and talk to him. He hasn’t respond to me and is getting quiet snappy. So I thought since you’re his older brother he’d listen to you more.” She explained. Lucifer stayed quiet. Mammon never told him about this. /Is mammon causing trouble again?/ Lucifer thought.

They walked all the way to the elementary building. The shift between the regular school building walls to the more childish area was a real change. Everything seemed so small. Taking a semi familiar rout he’s usually take to walk to and from buildings. Once there we walked to the office building to see Mammon sitting in a chair. His knees where to his chest and his head was sitting on top of them. He had a bandage on his knees, cheek, elbow, and nose. He had a small pout on his face. When he heard the door open he looked over to see his assistant principal and his brother. Seeing them made him turn away again.

The assistant principal walked in having Lucifer follow. The door shutting behind them. “As you can see I’ve had him wait in here while I came to get you. Please have a seat.” She said as she took a seat at her desk gesturing to the empty seat next to Mammon. Lucifer sat down glancing at Mammon. He was upset but also a bit worried. Why was Mammon getting into fights with other classmates? “So I’m sure you’re wondering what exactly happened.” She said looking at the two of them.

Lucifer turned away from Mammon and turned his attention to the lady nodding. “Well you see. While at recess Mammon and two other boys where fighting. Mammon threw the first punch and it escalated causing the teachers to have to step in and break them up." Mammon sank into his knees a bit. Still pouting. "Where are the other two?" Lucifer asked. "Currently in the nurse office. Mammon tried to fight them even in the office." She said. Lucifer kept quiet. His face had a look of confusion.

He couldn't believe what he was hearing. If anything he was more disappointed than angry. "Would you like to tell your brother what happened?" She now looked at Mammon who refused to look at her. He shook his head. She sighed. "Not even to your brother?" Lucifer looked at his younger brother and spoke softly, "Mammon do you just not want to talk? Or do you not want to talk because she's here?" He was quiet for a moment. “Cause she’s here…” he mumbled. Lucifer looked at the lady, “Can we have a moment alone please?”

She looked hesitant to say yes. Her face looked like she wanted to say no right away but was really debating. “Please he’s never gonna talk if he’s not comfortable. Can we go outside and talk? I promise to stay within the area.” Lucifer asked putting his hand on Mammon’s knee. She signed, “Yes go ahead. But please stay in the area.” “We will.” Lucifer said. “Come on Mammon.” Lucifer spoke as he got up from his chair. Mammon got up slowly and looked down as he followed Lucifer out of the room.

Lucifer let the door close behind them as they walked out into their play yard. It was empty since it was class time all the kids where inside learning. Lucifer walked to a shaded area having Mammon still looking down. Lucifer finally got a look at his face. His hair was scruffy and his face was a bit dirty. It looked like he had been crying a bit too. “So.” Lucifer said finally breaking the silence. “You got into a fight-“ “It wasn’t my fault!” Mammon yelled a bit. Lucifer was caught off guard with Mammon’s sudden loudness. He turned to him with a shocked look on his face.

Mammon was shaking a bit, his fist in a ball. “I-I was protecting Levi a-and Asmo. They where being mean to them!” Mammon shouted as he wiped his eyes. Lucifer gave a sympathetic look as he put his hand on his shoulder. “Mammon tell me what happened please.” Mammon turned to Lucifer’s direction before speaking again. “Well, it was recess time. And then Levi came up to me crying.” “Crying? Why was he crying?” Lucifer asked worryingly. “It’s cause some kids broke his Ruri-Chan figure. They smashed it.” Lucifer sighed. “I told him not to bring it with him.” He said under his breath. “And they kept pulling on Asmo’s hair and clothes. They even cut his hair a bit too! So I had to help!” Mammon said as tears came down his face.

~ earlier that day~

It was recess time and Mammon was playing with the random playground equipment that was lying around. Currently all the 3rd graders and kids under where playing. Mammon being a 3rd grader was having a good time playing with a ball he found. Occasionally checking on his brothers who where way more down the playground. Levi was in kindergarten and Asmo was in pre-kindergarten. But they played in the same area. He wanted to make sure his little brothers where having fun, and sometimes if they where alone he’d go over and play with them.

Mammon was bouncing the ball trying to see how high he could make it to. Sometimes looking over at the high school building where Lucifer was. Sometimes he wonders if he could see him while walking to class something. While on his fifth try of trying to make the ball go pass the roof he heard crying and felt a tug on his shirt sleeve. It distracted him from catching the ball making it slam hard into the floor, causing the crying to become louder. Just as Mammon was about to get mad he looked to see it was Levi crying.

“Levi what happened?!” He asked worryingly. “They-they-“ Levi couldn’t get a word out with how many tears kept coming down his face. “They broke Ruri-Chan!” Levi cried as he held up a smashed Ruri-Chan figure. Her face was broken, her arm had been snapped, and she was disconnected from her body. “And-and they pu-ushed m-m-e.” Mammon instantly became protective. “Who did this?” Levi pointed to some bigger kids who seemed to be Mammon’s age. “Come on Levi. Your big brothers got this.”

He took his younger brothers hand who was still crying, holding the broken Ruri-Chan close. When he got to the smaller kids section he saw that the kids Levi pointed out where cornering Asmo. There was three of them. Two blocking off his exists and tugging at his clothes, pushing him around while the other had scissors and pulled on his hair. Asmo was screaming and crying trying to push him away but being three he’s not very strong against third graders. “Come on its just a little it’s no big deal. Stop being a baby.” The boy with the scissors said as he snipped a bit of his hair.

Not a lot just a little. That was it for Mammon. He ran over and pushed the boy away causing the other two to let go or Asmo. “MamMam!” Asmo called as he cried. Levi went with Asmo as Mammon stood in front of them. “It’s okay guys. Your big brother is gonna save you two!” He shouts. “Some big brother you are.” One kid said. “THESE are your brothers?! They look pretty useless to me.” Another said. “Hey shut up!” Mammon yelled getting in their face a bit. “You shut up.” He pushed Mammon back causing him to stumble a bit but he managed to catch himself so he doesn’t fall on his brothers.

“Leave them alone! They haven’t even done anything to you.” Mammon pushed him back. The other two watching while Levi was holding Asmo. “They’re annoying.” “You’re annoying!” Mammon said back. “And ugly! And stupid!” “Says you! You’re the dumbest in the class. You should be here with them!” The kid punched Mammon right in the stomach. “Mammam! Mammon!” His brothers called. Mammon held onto his stomach for a bit, “Awe you gonna cry like your stupid brothers here?” “Don’t call them stupid!” Mammon screamed as he got on top of him and started to punch him.

The other two ran while Mammon and the other fought on the floor. Levi and Asmo staying back. That was until a teacher came over and yelled at the two as she broke up the fight. Managing to get Mammon off the young boy. “You two behave right now! Stop it!” She yelled. They eventually stopped and both had scratch marks and bruises all over. She called a teachers assistant who came over to take care of Asmo and Levi while the teacher took the two to the nurse.

“How did this happen?” The teacher asked sternly as she crossed her arms. She looked down at the two boys who sat in a chair in the office. The nurse was getting bandaids ready. “He started it!” Mammon said pointing at the kid. “No he did!” He pointed back. “Did not!” “Did too!” “Did not!” Mammon pushed the boy after he said that causing the teacher to pull him back and the nurse to move the kid aside. “MAMMON YOU’RE GOING TO THE PRINCIPALS OFFICE AFTER. Ms.Joy please patch up Mammon first so he can go to the office sooner. I don’t trust him here with him.” She told the nurse.

She nodded and fixed up Mammon while the teacher called the assistant principal using the office phone. Once he was done she came over and picked him up and took him to her office. Once there they started talking. “Mammon you know what my you’re here don’t you?” She sat at her desk with her hands together resting on the table. Mammon sat in the chair with his arms crossed and looked away. He was still upset and even more so that he was getting in trouble and the other kids weren’t. They hurt his brothers they deserved it.

“Mammon I don’t think I need to tell you what you did was extremely inappropriate. So please explain to me why you did what you did.” She stated. Mammon kept quiet bringing his feet up to his chest. “It wasn’t my fault.” He mumbled. “Well the teachers said you threw the first punch so you clearly had something to do with it.” She replied back looking at him a bit sternly. Mammon kept his head down. She tried asking again and again before sighing as she rubbed her temple. “Fine if you won’t answer I’ll go get your brother. Maybe you’ll listen to him instead.” She got up from her chair, “Do not leave this office.” Was what she told him before she left.

~Present Time~

Mammon finished telling the events of what happened today. He was crying now as he wiped at his eyes. Lucifer just held him close and rubbed his back in a circle like motion. “I tried but she didn’t believe me.” He mumbled into his chest. “I believe you Mammon. Thank you for protecting your little brothers. You did good.” Mammon looked up. “I did?” Lucifer smiled as he looked down at his younger brother. “Of course. I’m very proud of you.” Mammon turned red a bit as he looked away.

“Come now let’s go tell her what happened.” Lucifer said as he pulled away. Mammon looked hesitant before Lucifer put his hand on his shoulder. “It’s okay I’ll be here to help tell what happened.” Mammon nodded as they headed back to the office. The assistant principal waiting at her desk. “So are you finally ready to talk?” They took at seat and her desk nodding and repeated what Mammon told Lucifer to her. “I see. And you’re sure this is the truth.” She asked. “Yes!” Mammon cried. “Ask Levi and Asmo! They saw it all!”

“Levi wouldn’t lie. I’m not sure how much you’d get out of Asmo being so young but you should definitely ask them.” Lucifer interjected. She sighed again. “Right I will. Well thank you dear for your help. I’ll talk to them and others right away. Even if it was in self defense I still have to give some punishment. So Mammon you can’t play at recess for three days. If what you’re saying is true the three boys will get three weeks of no recess.” Mammon obviously wasn’t happy about it. He didn’t see the reason why he should be getting in trouble but three days was better than three weeks.

Mammon nodded. “Fine..” he uttered. “Good. Sorry to pull you out of class Lucifer you may go back. Same goes for you Mammon.” The two got up and left the office. “Alright then I’ll be heading back to class. I’ll see you after school today okay?” Lucifer said as he ruffled his hair. “Stay out of trouble.” Mammon whined pushing his hand away. “Luucciiii! I’m not a baby anymore.” Lucifer chuckled. “That may be so but you are my baby brother.” “Hey!” Lucifer laughed. “Okay okay. Go back to class now.” Mammon nodded. “Bye Luci!” He said as he ran back to class with a smile on his face.

Lucifer watched him until he was out of sight and turned away to walk back to his own class. And so the day went on like normal. Lucifer finished up his last class and as the bell rang he packed up his backpack and headed over to the elementary building. Lucifer walking through the crowded halls trying to avoid as many people as possible. All he could think about was his brothers. Is everything okay? Did she talk to them? Are Levi and Asmo hurt? Is Mammon doing okay? So many questions going through his mind.

He was so lost in thought he didn’t even realize Mammon was calling to him. “LUCII!!” Mammon called waving at him. Mammon, Levi, and Asmo where all in the same spot they’d be at everyday to be picked up by Lucifer. Lucifer looked up coming back into reality to see Mammon smiling at him. Asmo was hugging his leg while Mammon had his hand on his back. Levi was also doing the same expect he was slouching into Mammon. He was more focused on the plastic bag in his hands but Mammon still had his hand on his back.

Lucifer smiled softly. It was a cute sight even though he knew his brothers where upset it was nice to see them all together. Lucifer walked over looking at his younger brothers kneeling in front of them. Before he could even get a word out Levi and Asmo ran up to him and hugged him which caught both Lucifer and Mammon off guard. “LUCII!!” They cried. Well Asmo’s sounded more like “Wuci!” Then Luci. Lucifer smiled and hugged his little brothers close hearing them cry. “Hey buds. Are you okay? I heard what happened are you hurt?” He spoke softly as he tried to calm them.

“I-It was scawy!” Levi cried having Asmo nod. “I know it was and I’m sorry I wasn’t there. But Mammon was there right? He kept you safe.” Lucifer looked up at Mammon with a soft smile. Mammon blushed. “W-Well yeah! I’m supposed to! I’m their big brother!” Lucifer laughed a little as he kept holding them. They cried into his chest as he gave a sympathetic look. “Shh shhh it’s okay bud. Shh you’re okay now.” He kissed their heads as he spoke. “You guys are safe now right? It’s not gonna happen ever again I promise.”

Lucifer pulled them back a bit as he whipped their tears with his thumb. Lucifer ran his fingers through Asmo’s hair. “Well your hair doesn’t look too bad. It’s not very noticeable. Don’t worry Asmo you still look great.” Asmo looked up hopefully. “Weally?” “Really.” He ruffled his hair a little. He knew his brother really liked his looks. He was always a fan of dressing up and doing his hair. While he wasn’t the best with his hair being very young that was Lucifer’s job. But he really enjoyed dressing up.

“When we get home I promise we’ll put your hair into something really pretty sound good?” Lucifer spoke making Asmo nod and smile a bit. “Ya! wif a bow!” He tried to speak. Being so young he’s still developing speaking skill. Lucifer chuckled a little. “Yes with a bow.” Asmo wiped his face a bit before going back to Mammon putting his arms up. Asking to be picked up. Mammon bent down and picked him up placing on his hip best he could. Lucifer looked at Levi who still looked upset.

Pitifully looking at the plastic bag in his hands. Gently moving the broken pieces or the Ruri-Chan figure that where there. Lucifer put his hand on his cheek. “Levi are you okay? They broke Ruri didn’t they?” Levi nodded as silent tears fell. “I told you not to bring her to school she’s fragile.” Levi whined a bit covering his face. He was never good in these types of situations. “I know I’m sorry. I know that was your favorite one. How about this when we get home I’ll try my best to fix it okay? And if we can’t I’ll get you a new one.” Lucifer said gently.

“I promise as your big brother I’ll do whatever to make you happy. I’ll even let you watch her videos tonight even after bed time.” Levi perked up. “Really?” “Really bud.” Levi wiped his eyes with the back of his hands. “Kay..” Lucifer picked him up and set him on his hip. Levi put his head on his shoulder as he yawned. Mammon watched the whole time now Lucifer calmed his brothers down so easily. How he was so gentle with them. He wished he could do the same. Mammon held Asmo who was looking around the area.

“Come on let’s get going home.” He moved some of Leviathan hair out of his face as he adjusted him on his hip. Mammon looked at his older brother in awe. Lucifer caught a glimpse and asked, “What are you thinking about Mammon?” Mammon blushed a little. “Nothing…” he replied. “Come on tell me.” “Well it’s just..you’re so good them. A-and I wanna be good with them too! You made them so much calmer than I ever could.” Mammon pouted as he held Asmo close.

Lucifer smiled and put his hand on the back of Mammon’s head pulling him close and kissed it. “You’re a good big brother Mammon. You already where and you still are. You stood up for your little brothers and protected them. That’s all I could ever ask for. I don’t really like the idea of you getting into fights but if it’s for self defense and especially family it’s okay. I’m proud of you.” Lucifer praised him. Mammon’s blush grew as he kept his head down. “Y-y-you’re embarrassing!” Mammon managed to say.

“Yes but it’s the truth. And I’m sure your brothers feel the same way. Right you two?” Levi turned over to look at Mammon who was looking away. “Thank you Mammon for helping me.” He said causing Mammon to look up. “ ‘ank ou mammam!” Asmo cheered as he hugged his older brother. Mammon laughed a bit as he hugged Asmo back and ruffled Levi’s hair. “That’s what I’m here for.” And with that they walked home. A little late because of their conversation but it didn’t matter. Mammon was doing his homework while in the living room with his brothers.

Asmo was currently getting his hair done by Lucifer. Who was sitting on his lap while Lucifer was sitting on the couch. Upon further inspection he saw that Asmo was a bit scratched up on his arms. Probably from when those kids where holding him. They weren’t bad in fact most of them where markings more than scratches. But still he made a mental note to keep an eye on it. As promised Lucifer did put a bow in his hair. Two in fact both personally picked by Asmodeus himself. He was very happy with how it came out.

“ ‘ank ou Wuci!” Asmo smiled as Lucifer put him down. “Anytime Asmo.” By now Mammon was done with his homework so he was playing with Asmo. All while videos of Ruri-Chan played in the background. As promised Levi got to watch her and his eyes where practically glued to the screen. While they did that he took the plastic bag next to Levi’s backpack and held it in his hands. “I’ll be back Mammon I’m going upstairs real quick.” Lucifer called. “Kay!” Mammon replied.

Lucifer took it to his bedroom and tried his best to repair it. He knew this was Levi’s favorite thing in the whole world. It was a comfort item to him. The minute he had it he took it everywhere and if they had to leave somewhere he wouldn’t leave until he had her in his hand. Which lead to many tantrums but as long as she was there he was fine. Even helping him sleep in the worst of times. He took great pride in taking care of the figure. So Lucifer intended to do the same thing.

Eventually with the help of some magic he was able to bring it back good as new. Just like when he first got it. Lucifer held it gently and went to Levi’s room to look for the Ruri-Chan plushie he also cherished. He sleeps with it every night and even during long car rides. He takes it everywhere just like the figure. And If it’s not with him at all time he’ll cry his eyes out. But he still loves his little brother so whatever makes him happy he’s happy to provide it. Lucifer took it and went back downstairs seeing Asmo and Mammon playing together. Asmo trying to do Mammon’s hair with the many clips he had all very childish themes.

Lucifer smiled as they seemed to be laughing together. Mammon was also putting clips in Asmo’s hair so it was equal. Lucifer went over to Levi and tapped his shoulder getting his attention. “Levi I have a surprise for you.” Levi’s face lit up as he knew exactly what the surprise was. “Here. Good as new.” Lucifer handed him the more repaired figure making Levi smile ear to ear. I’m excitement and joy he flared his arms and kicked his feet a little smiling. It was the purest smile ever. Almost the same smile as when he got this toy on his birthday. Leviathan got up and hugged Lucifer tightly.

“Thank you big bro!!” He cheered. “You’re the best!” Lucifer hugged him back. “I’m glad to see you happy again but new rule. You can’t bring her to school anymore.” Levi pulled back with a distraught look on his face. “But..why?” “Levi she got broken today. I warned you about it already haven’t I? We don’t want her broken again do we?” Levi thought about it for a bit. And although he was right he still needed her. “But..but- I still need her! I wanna take her with me!” Levi whined. “I thought this was coming so here.” Lucifer pulled out the plushie seeing Levi stop his almost tantrum immediately.

“You can take her instead. Only if you promise not to get it dirty or ripped.” Levi held out his arms to hold it but Lucifer held it up from him making him whine more. “Promise first.” “I promise!” “Are you sure?” “Yes!” “You’re not just saying it are you?” “No!” Lucifer handed him the plushie and he gripped it with all his might. Snuggling with it. Lucifer laughed as he ruffled his hair. The night came and Lucifer made dinner for everyone and they ate like a happy family. The next day at school after Lucifer dropped them off he asked Mammon to point out which kids bullied them the other day.

When he did he walked over with a very creepy smile as he stood over them. “So I hear you’re the ones who bullied my brothers the other day. Is that true.” The fear on their face says it all. They started to back into the walls as he leaned into closer. “If I ever find out that you started trouble again with my brothers I will deal with you myself personally. You’d make a great hanging decoration on my fathers wall.” And with that he walked away with a satisfactory look on his face as hearing them shutter was like music to his ears. Did he just threaten some eight years olds? Yeah. Did he care? Not really. As long as they got the message he could care less and he carried on with the day as if nothing happened.

The end :)

I’m not too proud of this story but I’ll try and make better ones in the future

[sayitaliano]

Follow up to the previous question about foreigners: what kind of jobs do Americans/foreigners typically get when they move to Italy? Any tips about actually making it happen?

Ciao!

It really depends, especially nowadays. You can theorically try to apply for whatever you want, but remember that first the economical recession and now the covid, are making things hard for many (Italians and not, appliers and job givers too). Not to mention how some workers are treated in random factories or job places (but I guess it's not happening only in Italy).

Ofc, if you want to aim to certain positions in specific companies, it depends on your curriculum/studies. E.g. You might have studied to work for a Consulate or whatever else. Notice that sadly not all the Universities abroad release a degree certificate that is useful also in our country (and this is true also in the opposite way: not all our degree certificates/studies are valid abroad). I remember a Romanian guy I met some years ago: he graduated as an architect in his country, but could only work as a construction worker here (I think he could have studied a little more here to get a valid degree certificate, but he decided it was better to work - I'm not sure how this certificates-thing works though, so please take this info with the benefit of the doubt and be patient with me. I'll try to find more resources, if you want me to. Or if someone else knows better, please leave a comment, thank you!).

This said, it's also a matter of will (as everywhere, I think): you might need to adapt to jobs that aren't really your cup of tea, especially at first. Shop assistant (customer service person, salesperson), barman/barmaid, receptionist, doctor, warehouse worker, shelf-stacker, construction worker, bouncer, security guard, gardener, translator (esp. books), interpreter, caregiver, teacher (esp. your language), cashier, farmer, house cleaner, mail carrier, waste collector, but also jobs in which you can work in contact with other Nations' clients (manager/foreign trader): knowing two languages and the market/culture of the target Nations of your company could be a + point for you. I think these are probably some of the most common occupations foreigners might get (at least, for what I know/see). But I'm sure there are also other fields in which foreigners work here: as I said, it can really be whatever. It depends on you, how much you believe you can do something, how much you work for that, and... luck (sadly - I mean, meeting the right person, the one that wants to give you a good job opportunity, is a good boost. Not just working your way out to get it. And this is true for foreigners but Italians too).

All I can say, which is what I've been told myself, is to never give up and keep on trying and applying for your dream job (or come up with something yourself). No matter how many doors closed you will get, one day you'll make it. One way or the other. (I'm a little disappointed about making a job happen TBH, so yeah, take this with all the positivity and luck I can send you and all the ones searching for a job).

[missdawnandherdusk]

Begin Again

Draco X Gryffindor!Reader

Part One    Part Two    Part Three    Part Four

Summary: Defeated and betrayed you don’t know what to do. And you don’t do anything... Draco does. 

A/N: Hello all of my new lovelies! I’m so excited to see you all and to have so many of you despite me just starting this new blog for my new obsession. It means everything to me, your notes and comments and reblogs! I love you guys, enjoy this slightly angst, slightly fluffy part. (Also Hermione is such a bean)

Tags: @un-limiteddd @geekysimmerthings @coffee-addicti @ilikestuffproductions @msmcsmutt @ravn-87 @artemismohr18 @whygz @crazywritingbug @dolphincommander @bisexualbumblebeesstuff @fuzzy-panda @bitemebro522 @zombiesnips-blog @jillanaholland @shookyungsoo @savingdraco @welcometomyworldwithoutrules @akari180 @slytherin-emerald​

I ran.

I fled Down to Hagrid’s and seeing the tears on my face and the pain in my eyes, Hermione, Ron and Harry all ushered me into Hagrid’s hut.

“What happened?” They all demanded.

“It was Malfoy,” Harry spat. “He’s not here. He did this,” He hissed, pacing.

I yearned to shake my head and prove him wrong. To say that Malfoy didn’t do this, but I couldn’t. I hid my face in my hands and sank into one of the oversized chairs around me, panic running through my system.

“You two go back out,” Hermione said calmly. 

“What!? No!” They both protested.

“She needs to talk about what happened and she’s not going to do it when you two are yelling at her about the one who made her cry!” Hermione spat venomously. “Now out!”

Neither of them was going to argue with Hermione then. She and I remained in the cozy warm hut.

“What happened?” She asked softly, kneeling down beside me.

“I... I’m so confused, Hermione. I know there’s good in him. I know that. I just... I’m terrified that I won’t be enough...”

“What happened,” She asked again, placing a blanket around my shoulders. “Start with leaving study hall.”

I recounted the events in Snape’s office, my heart falling when I had to think about it again. The feeling of unwantedness washed through me.

“You’re not in trouble though?”

I shook my head.

“Then Pansy... I don’t know what... She went off on me, called me...” I shook my head again in denial. “I went to walk away, and she cast a spell,”

“Oh no,” Hermione gasped, checking me over for the side effects.

“No, no... he was there! He... protected me! He stood between Pansy and me!” I cried, my face falling back into my hands. “Then he started to leave... we threw accusations at each other... I told him I was tired of fighting... the feud... and I ran,” I took a deep breath. “I ran away from a fight. Some courage I have.”

“He protected you?” Hermione didn’t believe it, and neither would I unless I was there. I nodded.

Quietness fell over the hut save the crackling of the fire, though the fire was barely lit, only glowing embers remained. They held my attention.

_______________________

Can’t you see that?

The question rang in his head over and over as he stalked down to class. He knew the answer to the question, and he wished that it didn’t take him so long to figure it out.

Yes, he could see that you didn’t want to fight. He just didn’t want to admit it to himself.

Of course, he saw that you didn’t want to fight. Your demeanor had changed so much in the past few weeks. You seemed to be enjoying the quips that the two of you shared, but in the quiet moments—like the one in the hall the other night—you looked tired. In the moments that the two of you were alone, the fight against him was gone. In its place remained what he saw when you spoke to others—boldness, and warmth.

He couldn’t ignore the hurt in your voice as you accused him of trying to get you expelled. The betrayal, as if you didn’t expect it. He didn’t want to get you expelled. Not anymore. Not since you sent him the letter... Not since he asked his father to do it.

Then you called him a hero. The title that never applied to him. The title no one used to describe him, to describe everyone else but him. And you had done it—you saw him to be a hero for the simple act of putting Pansy back in her place.

When he got down to the field and Hagrid’s lesson, you weren’t there, but neither was the Golden Trio. Then he watched as Ron and Harry stormed out of Hagrid’s hut.

You must be in there then.

Harry’s eyes met his and he could feel the hatred in the stare. He wanted to shy away from it. He wanted to explain. He wanted to talk to you if he was going to be honest with himself.

There was no hope of that with Ron and Harry around though. Perhaps Hermione would let him talk to you...

The lesson passed and you emerged as it ended, puffy eyed and looking defeated. He hated it. He hated that he did that to you. You didn’t look his way. You didn’t speak to him.

You hung your head, shoulders hunched, and walked back towards the school. And he watched you go.

For the first time, the chill of the air and the frostiness of the snow soaked him to his bones.

 _______________________________

I was quiet during the rest of my classes and through dinner. Neither the teachers nor other students seemed to bother me or comment on the fact, they just left me be.

And maybe it was nice. I slipped into a feeling of numbness. That was nice too. Not feeling anything, even for a short while.

Ron and Harry seemed ever absent despite the situation. However, when they saw... him at dinner, they both stood, ready at my defense. There must have been something in my eyes that made them sit back down and sulk.

I dared to look over at him. Our eyes met as they often did, but I turned away, breaking the connection.

I wrote a letter to my mother, explaining what happened and sealed it off along with my emotions. I wasn’t expecting an answer back, so I started to comb through my Potions notes again and read through the lesson that I had missed in Creatures today.

A few minutes—maybe hours—later there was a tapping at my window. Half-expecting Penelope, I opened the window where there was a barn owl sitting, waiting with a note. I took the parchment and apologized for not having any food, and the owl chirped and flew off.

Staring at the parchment in my hands I had a good idea of who it was from. Not knowing what to do, I headed down to the common room, trying to find Hermione. The common room was empty.

Sighing, I threw on an oversized sweater and some socks as I padded down the cold halls of Hogwarts and to the library. I found Hermione and Krum together, laughing and looking at the same book.

Hermione caught my eye and sobered up quickly.

“Is everything okay?” She asked standing.

Wordlessly, I held up the letter. She came over and took it from my hands.

“I haven’t opened it. But I know it’s from him...” I whispered the confession as I wrapped my arms around myself. “I don’t know what to do,”

“Iz everything alroght?” Krum came up beside Hermione. “Are zu alroght Miz Y/n?”

I nodded and gave a weak smile.

“Give us a minute?” Hermione smiled sweetly and took my arm leading me into the hall.

She opened the letter, skimming it over, a smile growing on her face as she read it through. I fidgeted, wanting to know why she had reacted that way. She offered me the letter.

“Read it and go find him,” Hermione smiled as she headed back into the library. I frowned and my eyes started to read: ~ Y/n,

I told my father a month ago that I wanted you expelled, before...

I don’t want you gone. Not really. You push me to be a better wizard and student and I need someone like you around.

I’m sorry that I was such an asshole to you. I’m sorry that I didn’t see that you didn’t want to fight sooner. I’m sorry about what Pansy said. You’re a great wizard and an honorable pure blood.

I’ve never told anyone anything like this ever and I have no idea if I’m doing this right. 

Please don’t give up on me,

Your hero, Draco

~

My fingers ran over the perfect script that wobbled here and there in uncertainty. Tears sprung in my eyes as I read it over and over. The words dove deep into my heart, igniting my spark again. I wasn’t numb, I was hopeful. I was smiling.

Hermione was right, I had to find him. But how?

Harry’s map.

I raced back to the Gryffindor Tower, but before I could get to the right staircase, my need for the map vanished. In my haste I had knocked us both over so that we were a heap on the floor.

“Draco,” I gasped, smiling.

“Y/n?” He seemed surprised. “You’re smiling again,” Confusion colored his tone. 

“Yeah,” I nodded, “Some guy wrote me a really sweet letter...” I trailed off.

“Is it the guy you wrote to your mom about?” He seemed disgruntled as we both struggled to stand. “Heard Ron talking about you liking someone,” he explained. “Must have seen how upset you were today...”

“Yeah,” I righted my sweater and ran a hand through my hair. “He did notice,”

“Well, I’m... glad that someone here knows how to make you happy,” He scoffed, defensive.

“I got your letter too,” I nudged his shoulder—he dressed about the same as me, sweater and sweats with the Slytherin logo on them.

He didn’t say anything. He didn’t see it, that was obvious. He wasn’t connecting the dots. I had told him that I had written to my mother about him. Couldn’t he see that they were all about him?

“Draco—” I started and stopped. “You’re smart, you’ll figure out who,” Was all I could say as I headed up to the Gryffindor Tower. “Tell me when you figure it out!” I called over my shoulder.

____________________

Draco gaped at you as you went up to your dorm. You must have gotten another letter from your secret admirer that made you happy. That erased what he had done to you and made you happy again.

So why in the world would you want him to tell you when he figured out who it was?

He sulked back to his room, determined to burn the letter that you had sent him. You didn’t need him. You had someone else to pick you up again, to make you smile. Someone else who was more worthy of your time and effort than him. Maybe it was Krum after all...

Taking your letter in his hands, he looked over it one last time as he went over to the fireplace in his dorm room.

You’re smart, you’ll figure out who, your voice was soft and gentle in his mind.

What did you mean by that? Why had you gone back to being cryptic again? After he had just told you the truth... The first time he had ever written what he had truly felt, and you fell for someone else.

~

My mother sent me a letter. I spoke to her about you.... I don’t want to fight you. Not really.

~

The words of your letter seemed to float off the page and surrounded him as it fell into place. 

It was him.

You had told him already that it was him. He was the one that you sent a letter to your mother about and the response that you talked to Ron about—about some guy that you liked. It was his letter that you called sweet and that made you smile again. He was the one who noticed and the one you had chosen.

Why you didn’t just tell him that...

But that wasn’t you was it? You always pushed him to figure things out on his own. 

He gripped your letter in his hands as a smile broke out across his face.

You had chosen him after all.

.

.

Part 6

[otonymous]

How To Get Your Groove Back

Dearest Nonny,

I just wanted to start off by saying that I’m very sorry you’re in this difficult situation.  I wouldn’t call what I’m about to discuss “advice” per se, because everyone’s personal experiences are different and what worked for me may not work for another.  That being said, please take what I say with a grain of salt — deconstruct it, take and use the things that vibe with you and toss the ones that don’t.

(Posting the rest of this under a cut.  For those who aren’t in the mood for IRL musings, please feel free to skip this 🤣):

I feel you, dear Nonny, I really do.  I also went through a similar experience and it took a lot of honest introspection on my part to come to terms with the fact that I wasn’t at a place where I wanted to be.  

I think a lot of times, people in general struggle with expectations.  You mentioned that you majored in something you didn’t enjoy.  Have you stopped to ask why that was the case?  I know it’s not uncommon for people to enter a field of study they have no interest in just because it was expected of them (either explicitly or perceived) — whether it’s by family members or other authority figures, or maybe even friends and society at large.  Oftentimes, their intentions are good: certain fields are perceived as being more financially secure than others.  Maybe they thought it was a good fit for someone like you.

“You may not love your job, but hey, who does?  The most important thing is that it’s stable and pays the bills.”

Don’t get me wrong, financial stability is definitely important.  As per Maslow’s hierarchy of needs in the study of psychology, you cannot talk about self-actualization if your basic needs aren’t met.  You’ve got to make sure you have a safe home and food in the fridge before you can even think about painting that masterpiece, writing that novel or running that marathon.

(Maslow’s hierarchy of needs - accessed from Wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow's_hierarchy_of_needs.  Please note that while this theory has its critics, the basic idea applies in this case)

That being said, imagine you land a job related to your field of study.  Really try to picture yourself working there for a number of years.  If you didn’t enjoy it in school, do you foresee that you’ll enjoy working in this environment, day in and day out for x years of your life?

I am of the belief that one cannot stay for long in a place (literally and figuratively) where they are unhappy without losing a part of themselves.  It makes for a soul-crushing experience, and life is too short to spend it being miserable.  You owe it to yourself to seek your own happiness.  And while others can aid us in this journey, it is ultimately yours to make.

On a related note, I also feel that the concept of job security as earlier generations may have understood it no longer exists.  One rarely talks about loyalty between employers and employees these days, and occupations that were once considered sure bets in terms finding employment are no longer panning out.  Keep in mind that when I talk about employment, I mean jobs that actually offer fair and liveable wages.  So while this may not apply to you at the moment, dear Nonny, keep this in mind when you eventually land a job.  Not to be a downer or anything, but nothing is for certain except for the fact that YOU’VE got your own back, so look to your own two hands to make that magic happen.

Because happiness is a type of magic in and of itself, isn’t it?  And if you already know what brings you joy, half the battle is already won!  If you don’t, that’s cool too.  Just think about the hobbies you have now, or look to the things you enjoyed doing as a kid.  Which topics could you literally spend hours upon hours reading or talking about?  Do a deep dive and really brainstorm these things.  As per Marie Kondo, what really sparks joy in your life, and can you find a way to make a career out of it?

Now I’ll tell you something about myself as an example, dear Nonny.  I love to write.  I always have, for as long as I can remember.  The moment I could properly wield that pencil, I was making up stories to accompany messy Crayola drawings.  

Writing also opened doors for me.  Teachers took notice; I was placed in specialized programs and had my work published.  I took a single English course as a student in university as a breadth requirement and was awarded a scholarship from the department.  The last comment I received from my TA was an expression of his hope that I would consider pursuing a career in literature.

In spite of all this, I chose to pursue a career in something entirely unrelated because of the reasons listed above, opting to go for something safe in terms of job security rather than something I was passionate about.  And then the writing stopped.  Because it is incredibly difficult to find the time and energy to devote to the things you love when you are emotionally drained by your work.

I firmly believe that life is a journey and not a destination.  It adds unnecessary stress to think that one only gets one shot at a career when in reality, many people make several career changes throughout their lives.  Where you are now doesn’t have to be the end.  And while the profession I chose (and spent a long time working towards) didn’t turn out to be a good fit for me, it wasn’t a complete loss as it taught me about what I did and did not enjoy.

And dear Nonny, you’ll just have to take my word for it when I tell you that when you are focused on doing something you love, you will never, ever, feel like an imposter.

So to recap:

Secure your finances first and foremost.  Make sure you’ve got the funds to keep yourself (and any dependents, if applicable) afloat and comfortable when you decide to make the jump for your dream career.  This might mean that you’ll have to stick with a job that is less than ideal for a while to secure your nest egg, so to speak, or you might have to spend your downtime developing your second (desired) career until it’s stable enough for you to make the transition completely

If you’ve got the choice, my dear, please ensure that the management you’ll be working under is taking the proper steps to secure the safety of their employees during this pandemic

If you can’t readily point to the things/pastimes you enjoy, make the effort to rediscover yourself.  Once you find what sparks joy, HUSTLE and make it work for you.  You’d be surprised by the way people can monetize their hobbies these days 😉

Above all else, dear Nonny, please know that you deserve to be happy, and that you have the power and capability to make it happen.  So go forth and live the life you want to live.

Wishing you the best of luck! - XOXO, Otonymous 💖💖

[addierose444]

How I Got Into Smith: Part II

In part I, I wrote about my high school extracurricular activities. In this post, I focus on the academic side of my application. I’ll be honest that these posts weren’t as well planned as I would have liked and that ideally, this part would have been first. It was initially going to be a single post, but I didn't have enough time to finalize this part before my unofficial deadline of Sunday at 11:59. It worked out in the end as splitting it into two parts created a new blog post out of thin air. Furthermore, it turns out I had a lot more to add to this part. 

My academics were definitely a strong aspect of my college applications. For some additional context, I applied to Smith regular decision and was admitted with a presidential scholarship. To learn more about merit aid at Smith, click here. Smith was my first choice throughout the application process and I actually submitted my application before the early decision deadline. To read more about why I chose Smith or more accurately why it became my first choice, click here. For additional context, I attended a public high school in Vermont with a graduating class size of 106 with 65% of the class attending two and four-year colleges. If this post is interesting to you, you may also enjoy reading about my academic journey to engineering and computer science. 

I’ve always loved school and education has been a top priority. Between middle and high school, I took six and a half years worth of high school science classes. In addition to the advanced track of our regular curriculum, I took a marine biology class that included a research trip to Bermuda and three APs (chemistry, biology, and physics C mechanics). You can read more about my AP experience here. Of the three main sciences, physics is my favorite. As a class though, I think AP biology was the best. I won departmental awards my first and last years. I was really proud of the first science award as it was a special award created just for me (as opposed to for a specific class year). The crazy thing about taking all these science classes is that I have taken very few science classes here at Smith. Thinking about this irony is part of why I thought to write this post in the first place. Technically I have only taken two science classes (PHY 118 and PHY 210) during my time at Smith. (And to be honest, PHY 210 hardly counts as it's really just an applied math class that’s offered by the physics department). You can check out all of my Smith courses here. The reality is that I fulfilled the introductory chemistry and physics requirements of my engineering major with AP credits.

In addition to lots of science classes, I doubled up on math classes in ninth and eleventh grades. Granted I didn’t take math my senior year and retook calculus at Smith. I think there were some clear flaws in my math education as many of the courses were too easy and had too much overlap year to year. At the same time, we didn’t cover enough trigonometry and had other gaps in our precalculus course. I did learn a lot in my AP statistics class and was surprised by how much I enjoyed the content. It makes total sense in retrospect as I now see math as an interesting and useful tool. Back in elementary and middle school, math was my favorite subject and I loved it in isolation of other subjects and real-life applications. In ninth grade, I got a math award, but unlike the other departmental awards, a lot of people got them. 

My favorite class of high school was AP computer science A. In that course, I learned Java and the basics of object-oriented programing. In ninth grade, I’d been introduced to computer science through a semester-long Python course. In my senior year, I took an online website development course from my state university. I learned HTML, CSS, and some PHP. I also took a semester-long engineering course. It didn’t have math or science prerequisites, lectures, or structured assignments. What it did provide was a fun self-directed opportunity to learn how to use our new CNC machine and work with (mostly fix) the 3D printers.  

Four years of English were required to graduate, so I took our required ninth and tenth-grade courses followed by an advanced expository writing course and an advanced literature course called world authors. I’ve always loved reading, but English classes and literary analysis aren’t really my thing. To read some of my reflections on writing, click here. I managed to win an English award my sophomore year which was cool as I’d never really seen English as a strong subject of mine. Granted, I didn’t like my sophomore English class as it only had seven other students who clearly didn’t want to be there and didn’t do assignments well or on time. I also took French all through high school and won awards my first and last years. I was generally more engaged with school than my peers, but French is where my peers’ lack of engagement had the most negative effect on my learning. I’m not trying to brag about any of my academic awards, but I do genuinely believe I did stand out on my own merit. When it came to French, it was more just that there wasn’t much competition. 

Social science classes were the ones I generally avoided. Knowing that I only needed three years of social science to graduate and having already doubled up on math and science, I skipped the ninth-grade social science class. As a sophomore, I took the advanced version of our sophomore social science class called democratic roots. As a junior, I took AP U.S. history as U.S. history was required to graduate. The other AP courses were of actual interest to me and this was the only one I took for the AP designation. It was one of my least favorite courses, but I defend my decision to take it as the regular version was sort of a joke at my school. Furthermore, the APUSH teacher was also the advisor for the school publication and was able to write what I presume to be a strong letter of recommendation. As a senior, I took a semester of AP art history and another semester of art history through my local community college. The AP course was entirely online through UC Scout. I didn’t finish the AP course as the community college version was free due to my state’s dual enrollment program. The community college course was also fully online and was much more limited in scope.  

I was in the jazz band from eighth through tenth grade. I played the electric bass, an instrument I picked up because they needed a bass player. Jazz isn’t my kind of music, so I never really got into it. To check out some of my favorite songs and musical history, click the respective links. I “quit” the jazz band as it conflicted with AP chemistry. The bass is an integral part of the rhythm section, but rhythm doesn’t come naturally to me and is challenging even with deliberate practice. I was used to being in all of the advanced courses but was in the intermediate jazz band with eighth and ninth graders. Additional required electives included health, financial literacy, and three semesters of physical education. The only class I did over the summer was an independent study for physical education credit. The running I did for the self-directed course probably helped earn me a spot on the varsity field hockey team. I also took a weight lifting class which I absolutely hated. 

I wasn’t planning on sharing my actual stats, as there is so much more to college admissions than raw scores or even academics. What really matters is (in terms of academics) is the rigor of your courses in the context of the high school you attend. However, if you’ve read this far, I don’t really mind sharing my actual grades and scores. I earned straight As throughout high school and had a GPA of 4.26 (unweighted on a 4.33 scale). My school didn’t officially do class rank, but I am almost positive I had the highest grade point average. I do know that at the end of my junior year I had attained the “highest level of academic achievement” which I presume takes into account courses and grades. A lot of schools have gone test-optional due to the pandemic, but it’s worth noting that Smith was already test-optional. I don’t know exactly how merit scholarships work, but I am guessing that a strong SAT/ACT score would be necessary to earn one. My SAT score was 1500 (780 math and 720 verbal). I did study a lot over the summer before senior year and improved by almost 150 points from my PSAT. I also submitted SAT subject test scores of 790 for chemistry and 770 for math level II. 

[yukusaki]

Would you happen to know if there's other types of job opportunities for someone who wants to work in Japan but has no interest in teaching yet isn't fluent in Japanese for any Japanese-speaking jobs?

Before I get into it, how many of you are interested in this kind of info such as moving to Japan, visas, job searches, etc? I was thinking of doing a podcast for this kind of thing since I clearly like talking so much. Drop me an ask! And I've done a lot of research on visas so feel free to ask me about more details.

This response is kind of for everyone so there might be some info that doesn't really apply to you, anon. I'm assuming you're from the US or for some other reason can't get a working holiday visa in Japan, in which case, I sympathize.

Unfortunately there's nothing I can tell you that you're gonna like. If you're searching from overseas, you'll have to be extremely, extremely lucky to find a non-teaching job that will hire you from outside Japan. Of course, if you have experience in something like programming or engineering, that might be a different story--search in your own field if you have one (I'll link some job search sites I've used below but I can't help too much with info for specific fields). The trick is still going to be getting hired from overseas--sponsoring a visa for a foreign worker is a hassle for a company, and, if the rumors I've heard are to be believed, quite expensive. The good news is that you only have to get sponsored once. After that, you can renew or change jobs much more easily, even if your new job is in a different visa category.

If you're like I was a few years ago and you aren't living in Japan and don't have experience in a highly sought-after field and you don't have another road to a visa (such as a Japanese grandparent), here are the best two options.

Option one

suck it up and get an English teaching job, since it's the only industry I know of that's likely to sponsor your visa. Once you get hired, start looking for another job and leave asap. Like ASAP. Here are some options if you're desperate enough to try teaching:

the JET programme--first just because it's widely known. The application process is lengthy and a huge pain in the ass, as well as quite competitive, and working conditions are supposedly hit or miss but I've heard far more less-than-favorable stories.

Nova--the company I worked for for a year. Offered me a job within a week of the interview with very little teaching experience. Unquestionably the worst job I have ever and will ever have. Unfortunately other private eikaiwa are not rumored to be much better.

Gaba--slightly longer interview process and I guess a bit more competitive since I applied twice, once with no experience and from outside Japan, once with 1 year experience and from inside Japan, and was not offered a job either time. However they will hire English teachers who are not necessarily native speakers, for anyone out there who this might apply to.

Interac, ECC, Berlitz, etc., there's tons of other big eikaiwas.

option two

get a student visa, which obviously requires a bit of money. I imagine a university student visa is not likely to be in your plan, anon, but you can also get the other category which includes technical schools and language schools. If you're interested in learning Japanese, try gogonihon--they have a variety of Japnese schools and if I remember correctly will give you some amount of support. If you're interested in some other vocational school, you might have to do it on your own. You can legally search for a job once you're in japan with a student visa. You can also work most part-time jobs with a student visa as long as you apply for the permit at the airport when you land in Japan (applying later is still possible but takes a few weeks). I would highly recommend a hotel job or something else that might be able to sponsor a visa--I know a person or two that was offered a full-time job after working at a hotel part time for a while, but idk how common it is.

If you do go one of the two above routes, the best industry to get a job in from within Japan without much Japanese, and assuming no other marketable experience (in my opinion), is tourism, specifically hotels and guesthouses.

Some sites I used when job searching:

Gaijinpot--well-known, has support for jobs as well as apartments and such. Some jobs may offer visa sponsorship.

Yolojapan--another fairly well-known one

indeed--tons of jobs but a bit of a tossup. Includes all jobs so you'll have to search for ones that don't require Japanese.

gogonihon--another kind of catch-all service that will help with housing as well. I didn't personally use them for job searching but I attended a language school through them.

jobsinjapan--don't remember much about them but I did search on there occasionally

nipponshigoto--the website seemed to have changed hands halfway through my job search so I don't know if this is still true, but they had the most non-English-teaching options that I can remember. I ended up getting my current travel agency job through them.

Keep in mind

a job visa requires a 4-year degree (or equivalent?) That's a requirement for the visa, not the job. You might not be totally out of luck if you don't have a 4-year degree though, so just do some research.

a non-university student visa is good for two years total, in your whole lifetime. Not two years at a time, two years, ever. Don't dilly-dally if you go this route!

finally, a warning

I doubt I'm the first person to tell you how difficult it is to move to Japan, but it's really something you need to keep in mind. There's a lot of processes and laws you have to know about that no one is going to help you with--not even the company that hired you or the school you're enrolled in. Not even the services that claim they will. These processes and laws are not just when you first move to Japan, but will haunt you as long as you live here. Staff at the immigration office don't even seem to speak much english, let alone local city and tax offices. Really think about why you want to live in Japan and make sure you aren't going to regret it when you're sitting outside the tax office in tears because you've explained your situation six times over two visits, both of which you had to take time off work for, but they still can't help you and can't even point you in the right direction but if you don't figure it out you're in trouble. Yes, that did happen to me and I speak N2 level Japanese (if your eikaiwa has a direct hire contract and an independent contractor contract like nova does, do NOT pick the Independent one even if you'll get paid more, please I'm begging you, I promise it is not worth it and also its legality is questionable.) I cannot stress enough how much you need to really think about this.

If none of these options appeals to you

don't give up! These are only the options that I personally know of. Also, Japan has a population time bomb on their hands, so they're more motivated to let in foreigners so that the country doesn't just collapse when they don't have any young people left. it's gotten easier in recent years to get certain types of visa and it's not unlikely that it will continue to get easier in the future.

Good luck anon! Tell me how it goes and feel free to ask me any more questions!! I didn't go through moving to Japan to not help others have an easier time than I did!