#I actually had to change the sex scene cuz I was like /isn't that what you were gonna write for Doug/ /oh shit you're right!!/

[gojuo]

As a mom i find it revolting that condam and hess made helaena say « i shouln’t feel sad cuz babies die all the time » wtf it’s not about babes ditng it’s about HER babe diying so if it was a childless person sying that ok but not from a mother who just lost her babe and they are making aegon the bad guy for wanting revange 👌👌👌 chef kiss just chef kiss 🙄 i am thinking that that phrase was just written so they can brush aside the kids deaths so they can justify women againts war narrative but i stil’ jave hope in humanity and that people will see what they are doing and stop sying it’s a good show like bitch if it was my daugther that was killed and i had a dragon i would burn and kill everyone just so they pay. Helaena dosn’t even look depressed like in the books so what will the excuse be that she dosn’t go burn dragonstone on dreamfyre???

That scene really rubbed me the wrong way but I haven't quite been able to put to words exactly why and how .... But @zumurruds explained it quite well here:

I've already said something on the narrative weight of B&C, and it's quite evident to me that the writers have been trying very hard in undervalueing its importance because of what zumurruds said above. If Helaena herself gets over Jaehaerys' death in the span of one day, if Aegon does, if Aemond's reckless actions that led to the assassination are never reckoned with by any character, if all that Alicent says about him is "The child's pain is ended" (to service the writers' attempt at dehumanizing Jaehaerys to make the viewer not care about him), if Otto's PR move is framed as something nefarious instead of the typical funeral procession of a member of the royal family, if we don't even see Jaehaerys' funeral like we did Luke's, then how can the viewer be anything but desensitized to Blood and Cheese? How can the viewer do anything but exonerate Daemon and Rhaenyra of this act? Rhaenyra in the episode literally said, "I would never harm innocents like Helaena!" As if this line isn't a blatant attempt at manipulating the viewer to feel a certain way about Rhaenyra's involvement in B&C by the writers, egregiously using her as a mouthpiece to absolve her of any evil she causes and has caused. Clearly whitewashing her of this act. Daemon too, because "It was a mistake! I only named Aemond!" and then having him have hallucinations in Harrenhal of Jaehaerys. We've actually seen Rhaenyra with Jaehaerys more times than we've seen Helaena with him. Like let that sink in.... And what we get from all this is that Helaena forgives Alicent? ... So basically the narrative is implicating Alicent and Criston in Jaehaerys' murder (already did tbf when the writers changed her being in the room to her not being there), but it washes Daemon and Rhaenyra's hands completely clean.

I know there are people who are trying to rationalize that scene as Helaena dissociating in order to cope with the trauma, but when you factor in Condal openly saying that he views Blood and Cheese as it was written in F&B as propaganda uttered by Alicent, and then him removing her from the event to go have sex with Cole with that being the reason there are no guards protecting Helaena's chambers so as to implicate them both in the murder .... Is that really what we can assume Condal wanted to do with Helaena in this episode?

I hate that scene. I really fucking hate that ep.3 scene.

[cmyk-anaglyph-honeycomb]

Helluva Boss S2E9 blind blogging

[did the minimum about of editing and half of it was done while I was at work, so please excuse any grammar mistakes.]

(Mostly relating to the last episode)

Again, Stolas refuses to just talk. He was walking away and teleported Blitzo out of the building but now, after ignoring texts, he gets pissy cuz Blitzo wants to talk. 100% of this is because Stolas doesn't want a conversation. Blitzo misunderstands his intentions and jumps to conclusions, but when at least 3 opportunities to talk are given, Stolas shuts down.

Also where was this desire for a real relationship months ago after Blitzo admitted that he didn’t see their relationship as anything other than Stolas wanting to sleep with him. THAT is when they should've had an honest talk not mouths of avoiding each other.

(Okay now this ep)

God they made Blitzo so obnoxious to prove a point.

Veronika is a famous popstar, wtf does she care enough to throw an anti-Blitzo party? They have barely interacted in the show, never once in this season, why is she suddenly so pissed at him? How does she know Stolas is an ex, that happened recently.

If Stolas is that ‘done’ with Blitzo why doesn’t he just teleport him off the property again?

"Im UnCoMfOrTaBlE wITh HoW yOuRe SpEaCkInG tO mE nOw" fuck off. You had no problem going on a rant about all the dirty shit you wanted to do to him while he was being fucking gun down but now that shits uncomfortable. 

Stolas said whatever he wanted to Blitzo whenever he wanted and the second he doesn't feel like it, talking like that is breaking a huge boundary. Jump off a bridge.

Where did he get the impression that Blitzo and Striker were friends? Besides the games he never saw them around each other. Gives of the ‘these kids are near each other so they must be best friends’ energy. Like, no, they just met.

"You knew someone was trying to assassinate me?" 🥺 Yeah your wife was screaming about it two feet from your face. If it wasn’t important then, it isn’t important now.

I'll give Stolas the Striker thing and immediately take it away cuz it wasn’t like Stolas sounded afraid or even concerned during the phone call. How tf was Blitzo supposed to know royals could get hurt? Striker only had one angel weapon as far as IMP knew.

"Why would I allow everyone to see how much I like you? How I’ve tried to try so fucking hard to show I like you, to support you."

Fucking when? Where? Name literally one time. That shit at the harvest moon festival doesn't count because if Stolas actually cared he would've paid attention to how uncomfortable Blitzo was with him shouting pet names directly into the microphone. He’d know that him and Striker aren’t friends. Blitzo using the book was an arrangement for sex that Stolas offered. That is not support.

The one and only time their relationship was called out by others Stolas hid his face. Anything after has been in private and not where anyone, not even Blitzo was a witness. Ozzie is the only other person Stolas has openly confessed his feelings for. And he's with his own imp, so of course he isn't going to make a big deal about it.

“That was still the gayest thing I’ve heard all day!” Ignoring the actual line, why is he going feral? Wtf is this scene for? It's so out of place for what’s going on. This is something Loona would do.

“I don’t own you dick.” He’s right tho. Stolas tried to change the relationship without giving Blitzo a heads up or even communicating properly and then got butthurt when he didn’t get the answer he wanted and that was before Blitzo went off on him. And that’s after months of avoiding each other. This talk about changing their arrangement should’ve happen after Ozzie’s. Or at least hinted in Seeing Stars.

Why is the murder family wife getting an apology like she didn't try to kill IMP too ?Why does Blitzo know where she lives. DHORKS shouldn’t get apologies either, kinda ruins the point of Blitzo doing this ‘my name is Earl joke’ if he's apologizing to these people he had the right to hurt. I wonder if Moxxie got an apology.

The party has no music, making it the funniest scene in the series.

I knew they were going to make Veronika the bad one but good lord what is this. Are she and Stella drinking the same crazy juice? That made her Lute levels of crazy. 

You're telling me that ALL these people are Blitzo's exes? That insufferable ass? Is he supposed to drop dead gorgeous and the crew didn't tell us?? cuz no way this annoying man can pull that many people.

How did Blitzo get that far into the party and no one, all of which are there because of how much they hate him, didn't notice? Did he sleep with that many people or just date them? Why are any of these people wasting their time like this? Blitzo isn't important, he doesn't do anything. He is another asshole in hell, a place filled with assholes. Wtf is Blitzo's shitty behavior so out of place?

Oh look another situation where Stolas being in a relationship with an imp is not given any levels of importance or notice. 

So Tex is just mouthing the words right, cuz no way his voice is just blending in like that. Why is he here? 

Did they recast Stolas's singing actor? This song is bland. The singing is okay, but the music might as well not be there.

He's whining about still wanting Blitzo but refuses to speak with him or attempting to get him to have a serious conversation. He has no idea what Blitzo wants and has never asked once.

Stolas is drunk now? He only had a few drinks. In the circus he downed an entire bottle and was fine. Now a few drinks of spiked punch and he's wasted?

They throw this party every year!? You are shitting me. Why? He has signs posted everywhere. His crew is three other people, just kill him if he's that big of a problem. 

The creators cannot convince me that all these people care more about Blitzo than the oppressive society they live in, a member of which Stolas is.

Stolas's drunk rant kinda reveals that he wants to be loved and less that he wants to be in a loving relationship with Blitzo specifically. Interesting.

Seconds later Stolas is flustered by some random guy just asking to dance. Interesting.

How does Verosika know about the apology tour? He walked out on her when she said I love you, okay that's bad, but after spending so much of the episode making her look like a crazy ex, it gives off the impression that he dodged a bullet. At the very least Blitzo is actually in the wrong and it isn't some misunderstanding like with Fizz.

Glad they addressed that Blitzo being bad at relationships is a weird thing to focus on but it isn't explained. Unless he is extremely abusive, many people should not care about him / still be angry. These people live in an environment where they can be murdered at any time and almost no one would care / do anything to help. Compared to all that, a shitty boyfriend is kinda nothing.

I’m glad Verosika wasn’t completely shat on during this episode, especially in the last bit. We probably won’t be seeing her again but at least she got to leave with grace. 

I like the ending song.

Final thoughts. This episode worked overtime to make Blitzo the bad guy. It pulled maybe 100 people out of nowhere to justify Stolas’s anger and for what? The way he was so quick to hook up with another guy, shows he doesn’t care about Blitzo, he cares about the idea of a good relationship. That’s fine on its own, but the first part of this episode and the end of the last was about Stolas making his shattered pipe dream Blitzo’s problem.

Out of all the episodes that do not have a B plot why is it this one?

[melancholycatastrophe]

Only Friends Ep. 5 Thoughts

spoilers

not even two minutes in and someone is trying to kill ray, its not looking good out here

nick interrupting the raysand handjob is so wild because sandnick knows that top cheated on mew and they know mew and ray are friends and theyre just not gonna say anything to ray, thats crazy

the raysand and topmew dates are so cute i just know this isn't gonna last

sidenote: that wasn't actually topmew being cute, it was forcebook. the only way i can keep myself sane is by pretending its just forcebook

sand dressed the way i want to dress im going insane he's my favorite kind of boy: guitar player, rock and indie fan, leather jackets, anger issues, homoerotic tension with men - if ray doesn't want him I'll keep him

NOOOO MEW NOT THE GLASSES

top fixing mew's glasses 😭 he's too fine to be such a scumbag

mew's prescription is -5.00, he's just like me fr

am i tripping or is mew now hyperaware of every time top talks to another man because he thinks that they're all ex-hookups or top might hook up with them after? like what was that look when the server gave top the bill?

IS THIS BITCH--? IS NICK CHANGING THE WAY HE DRESSES AND GOING TO THE GYM IN ORDER TO LOOK MORE LIKE TOP AND GET BOSTON'S ATTENTION????? BOY STAND UP PLEASE DONT BE LIKE TOP PLEASE

bostonnick in the pool just reminded me of that one kinnporsche pool scene im sorry i was hoping they would have sex in the pool

also -- diversity win! the lying backstabbing guy who is playing with your feelings and ruining his friendgroup believes in safe sex!

another thing that intrigues me: does boston even like his friends? cuz we've seen all four of them together and having fun, and they look to get along well if you ignore everything happening in the background, but individually? has boston hung out with or just simply had a normal convo with anyone? mew has with ray and cheum, and im starting to believe that boston hates mew for something that happened in the past or is really jealous, but does he hang out ray and cheum just one on one? because at this point it feels like the only person boston talks to is nick, which is.... idk I'm just so curious as to how the raymewbostoncheum friend group came to be

also the fact that he's not even interested in the hostel. the only people we've seen truly working on it are mew and cheum, mew possibly because if it fails he loses his place as top student, idk why but cheum is a business major so she probably has some vested interest in this project. i'm assuming ray is a buisness major because of his dad and even tho it's technically his project - as boston points out - i doubt he wants to work in that field

"I don't want to sleep around anymore. I want to have sex with someone I can talk to and be affectionate with" boston the word you are looking for is boyfriend. you want a boyfriend, and nick is right there (for some reason)

instead of being called only friends, this show should be called "getting cockblocked by all your friends" because this is getting ridiculous. first raysand, then raysand again, then bostonnick, and then raysand again

the way mew wants his friends to be in serious relationships is soo......cute, but also funny that he's over here rooting for his friends meanwhile he keeps top in a situationship like bestie look in the mirror

also i will chew on concrete if boston only dislikes mew because of top oh my god its never that serious over dick

ray please stop talking to that girl omg summer is too pretty to be involved in whatever the fuck you and your friends have going on, give her to me

that concert scene makes me miss brightwin idk

atp I'm gonna assume that every guy who looks at top has fucked him unless proven otherwise cuz this is getting ridiculous

ah fuck....mew has fallen for top..... but anyway this confirms mew is probs demiromantic and demisexual

not the debt collectors 😭 is it really a rich x poor storyline if there's no debt collectors?

sand's mom owns....the go go club....i'm.....oh my god thats why he was there in episode like 2

ray singing sand a love song for his birthday oh be still my beating heart

not mew calling boston to tell him that he's ready to have sex with top 😭 bestie i get that he's your friend with the most sexual experience and you dont want to tell ray cuz he had feelings for you but oh my god why did you tell ton??????

but also "I'm afraid if I don't have sex with Top he'll get bored of me" after seeing so many people check out Top that day.....Mew is finally at a point where he has romantic feelings for Top and its probably for the first time ever and he doesn't want to let him go so he'll have sex with him, he's so real honestly I relate to him a stupid amount

also...okay wait....so is the friendship between bostonmew one-sided or is top truly the reason why their friendship will crumble in the future? cuz mew calls boston about top for reassurance and boston reassures him for some reason....

out of context topmew is cute.....oh their break up is gonna be awful

their first time having sex was so sweet and tender but i know damn well this wont last

ray and his mommy issues back at it again

sand distracting ray from drinking more by sharing personal details about his life....oh......oh....

sand was named after the place his mom and dad had sex oh my god....

ray's mom 🤝 ray

suicidal and alcohol addicts

"Only Cockblocked By Your Friends" the series strikes again!!!

it just hit me that they're eating weed cookies.....

also... "sand, this isnt your usual stuff?" does this mean sand sold ton drugs before or....?

ray keeps saying he and sand aren't dating and its breaking both mine and sand's heart

bostonnick and raysand drinking and partying together doesnt sit right in my heart....somehow someone is gonna say something bad while high

"even if you really like ray, i doubt it would work out between you two" whelp there it is

boston for the love of god shut the fuck up so we can have happy raysand and topmew please stop telling everyone and their mother that ray is in love with mew so that he can move on oh my god please its only episode 5 i need some happy moments between the two couples a little longer please

why is ton airing out all of ray's dirty laundry why is he doing the things that he does he's so messy i love it

well......ray and boston are probably not friends anymore

boston is too fine to be acting like this

now that I'm thinking about it....were boston and ray ever friends or were they just in the same friend group? cuz back in like episode one he was the one who was supposed to take care of ray when he was drunk and didn't so, like....

that last scene with sandray is sad and all but I'm too distracted over the fact that they're sleeping without blankets covering them

WAS THAT RAYMEW FIGHTING IN THE PREVIEW NO I CAN TAKE EVERYTHING BUT RAYMEW FIGHTING STOP DONT DO THIS TO ME

[thegeminisage]

tng update time!! last night we did "the mind's eye" and "in theory."

the mind's eye: REDEMPTION FOR GEORDI??? they wrote this episode for me specifically to heal me from my geordi holodeck trauma

actually when they first said he was going to risa my heart dropped like a stone...i don't want to see him next to a woman ever again

happily, he got brainwashed <3

i will say though that there was a fantastic setup with absolutely no follow through. come with me, Brainwashing Connoisseur, on a journey. what are the three most important factors in a brainwashing story? 1. indiscriminate murder one will later feel tortured about 2. Big Scene where we break the conditioning 3. the little chairs they always put them in

this episode only managed to hit 1 out of 3. and the little chair was great! i was horrified, and also twirling my hair about it. we did also have bonus point categories "doubting sense of reality," "unknowing agent of evil," and "amnesia about the conditioning" ticked off. HOWEVER.

not only was geordi NOT allowed to murder people or even get a good attempt in, he didn't even get saved by anyone important (like data). the closest we got was him shooting o'brien in the holodeck simulation. and that was fun and made me really excited for what was to come, which was a lot of nothing. data figuring it out and then NOT rushing to be the one to intercept geordi and lovingly, as a bestie, wrestle him to the ground? letdown. why tf was it worf. why were those random klingons holding him back. what were we DOING people did they just not know how to cook up a good brainwashing in 91 or what!!! honestly

that said i did like the plot twist about the klingon guy being evil because he was genuinely so helpful in a non-suspicious way and disliked that other klingon guy that worf and i dislike. i'm always happy to be surprised like this

also i really hope worf gets his honor back someday im tiiired of people being mean to him about it :(

and geordi's little therapy session at the end was funny too. he's like haha i don't remember being tortured in a brainwashing chair at all! and deanna's like oh you're Gonna remember. and then he starts to remember and we roll credits. perfect. 10/10. could not have asked for a better ending

or beginning for that matter. it was just the middle that sucked :(

in theory: this was another episode with a very nice set-up and a lackluster payoff

firstly can we not disrespect data or tasha yar by pretending they did not fuck...it was weird, and it was in a bad season, but they DID fuck and to act like data is a virgin is ridiculous. maybe he doesn't know "dating" since they didn't date but he definitely knows how sex works cuz he had it. with tasha yar. may she rest in peace

i actually really liked this at first because data's gf seemed to get a huge kick out of all the insanely weird shit that is just constantly coming out of his mouth, which is right and just. i think they leaned a little too hard on data taking things literally and being "people stupid" in this episode, but i could have forgiven it bc she looked SO FOND every time data was being weird. i even said out loud with my mouth "this is a requirement to love him and be his gf. you have to love the dumb shit he says."

BUT THEN THEY HOOKED UP AND SHE IMMEDIATELY STARTED TRYING TO CHANGE HIM? like, telling him how to receive her gift, telling him to paint and not paint and paint again, and she's like well at least you're trying, you'll get there, BITCH HE IS PERFECT AS HE IS i would date data and i wouldn't make him change ANYTHING

also, it's so stupid. he obviously knows you're supposed to say thank you when you get a gift and i bet he's learned "please don't let me interrupt" isn't always meant to be taken literally either. dude has like two decades of experience now he wasn't activated yesterday

that said, the section where data asks everyone's opinion on whether or not he should date this lady was 10/10 except for picard's response which was sexist. my absolute favorite was riker's he was like oh buddy. you are gonna get LAID if you date this girl and then you can find out why everyone loves SEX like I DO did i mention SEX IS GREAT?? and i do kind of forgive riker for not knowing data and tasha fucked bc tasha asked him not to tell. so it was just funny the guy is such a slut (affectionate, honorific) that he's excited for data to get some too. it was very healing after that whole thing with beverly to see him happy about his buddy getting laid or whatever.

also i'm so fucking thrilled we got to see his cat again i love spot so much fr <3

my other gripe with this episode, aside from this woman dating an android and then being shocked he acted like an android, is...what even was that b plot? it had NOTHING to do with anything. normally they're at least tangentially related and i kept waiting for the gf to be secretly behind it or to get killed by it but this time it really was just some random thing. which frankly i think could have been saved for a better episode bc putting that lady through the floor was probably the goriest think trek has done up til this point. it ruled. give us a whole 45 minutes of that shit (just no morgue scenes please).

again, great setup, could've been lots of fun, mostly wound up being watchable but lackluster. bordering on disappointing :( theme of the evening.......

TONIGHT: redemption parts i & ii. i normally dont like finishing a season and starting one in the same evening but watching percy jackson put us off one so i'm gonna be a grownup about it. goodbye season 4!!!

[le-scenariste]

13, 14, 18, 19, 38 🥸 (sorry if some have been answered whoops)

13) Favourite ship and why?

HMMMMMM I WONDER (it's PatCap). God I fucking love those two and the kinda rivals (to lovers) thing they got going on. And the way they show different forms of leadership. They're the same but they're different and AAAAAAAAAA

14) Least favourite ship and why? (Please be nice though!)

I think Kitty/Thomas. If Kitty wasn't portrayed as childish and kinda naive and shit then I wouldn't care but idk...always just kinda seems off to me. (and also CapVers but mainly cuz it's overrated) Like...I know Kitty isn't an actual child but idk. It very lowkey gives me same vibez as "WeLl TecHnIcAlLy tHeY'Re 3000 yEars OlD". Yeah she is an adult but just...idk it just kinda weirds me out a bit. Maybe it's a me problem but

18) What is your favourite Ghosts fanfiction?

okay so this is really hard because on one hand Seb you're fuckin amazing but on the other...you know what you did. BUT OOT IS SO GOOD EVEN THO AAAAAAAAA. But also @ghosts-of-love holy fuck you're writing is amazing and I adore (aha) your fics. I can't choose AAAAAAAAAAAAA. But Out Of Touch by @stop-saying-tootsie and Adored, LtF and TQATD are definitely the top of the list. Also, if you haven't read this PLEASE DO. I promise you nothing bad happens in Out Of Touch. OOT is filled with joy and whimsy :) there is no sarcasm in this at all (btw just to clarify, yeah that was all sarcastic. have fun!)

19) What is your favourite Ghosts fan art?

Oh fuck. I think one of my faves was Robin as a Pokemon trainer cuz i inspired it. Otherwise it's either gotta be this by @wattse or this by @kami-ships-it very beautiful artworks and great styles. Love the colours and textures.

38) It's your turn to pick a movie for film club! What are you watching?

:) :))) :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))) I am aboutta write a LOT :))))))))))))))))

OKAY SO, the first one that comes to mind is Handsome Devil. Would this essentially be emotional turmoil for Cap ? Absolutely yes but 1) I'd love to see him understand that times have changed and people are accepting of queerness and 2) it's a beautiful movie that I think all the ghosts could benefit from watching. Especially the Captain. It's about these two kids in an irish boarding school who form an unlikely friendship (Ned - outcast loner and Conor - rugby fiend loved by the school for his skills). PLEASE WATCH IT IF YOU HAVEN'T. Also the soundtrack for this movie is BEAUTIFUL and makes me go a lil insane every time I watch it. IT"S GOT ANDREW SCOTT AS A GAY ENGLISH TEACHER !!!

Otherwise, I'd also choose The Nice Guys. Fun detective buddy-cop movie and so far everyone I've showed it to has enjoyed it. I also think it'd start a really good discussion about sex work and the judicial system. Not necessarily in relation to each other but still. Fanny would definitely be shocked just at the opening scene but honestly, I think after some discussing she'd enjoy it too. Maybe. Julian definitely would. But it's fuckin hilarious and also heartwarming with the lil hint of found family.

OOH OR OCEAN'S 11 now there's some good found family with another stellar soundtrack. Or Knives Out. NOW THAT, Fanny would love. I think she'd like the twist of it not actually being about WHODUNNIT but if Marta can get away with it and then finding out THE OTHER twist. Although idk how she'd feel about the whole "family losing their inheritance" thing. Hmmm. Idk why Fanny's been the one I'm tryna impress here. I think cuz most of them would enjoy these without fuss but ya know...Fanny.

Okay, if i had to choose ONE :( it'd be Handsome Devil. I'd love to make the ghosts watch that and see who's crying by the end of it :) and see who's trying to be very indifferent about it *cough* cap *cough cough*

[nicflurrymachinebroke]

MOM & DAD

"Mouth to dildo, dildo to ass, ASS to ass---HI BRENT!!---aNal bEADS."

I was DYINNNNNNGG. So slapstick it borders on Tom & Jerry so I originally said it reminded me of a Sam Raimi joint (Drag Me To Hell comes to mind) but it was apparently the guy who did Crank so that also tracks, yeah. Selma Blair fuckin KILLING ITTTTT. THE HORRIBLE PROSTHETIC NEWBORN LMAOOOOO. Loved watching them bond over the renewed plan to kill the kids 🥰 Watched him level that pool table like it was the Cocomelon & then the sledgehammering of the pool table while SINGING THE HOKEY POKEY was truly artistic cinema. THE SCREAM HE FUCKING SCRUMPT when peepaw stabs him in the leg one of the times is truly beautiful.

What a genuinely unlikable guy! I think that's what makes the actual mid-murder bonding so sweet, it's like a glimpse of what they used to be & made the performance actually have depth instead of him just being an asshole, like. Yeah, you didn't used to be this way, huh? You can see flickers of the relationship it used to be before kids/etc. happened & life got in the way & yeah, I think a lot of people end up becoming assholes cuz parenthood & the expectations of Adulthood™️ force them to sideline their actual selves & they weren't ready for that change cuz they still conceptualize themselves as the individuals they used to be & not the pronouns they've become.

I think a lot of viewers might dismiss that as hokey or a lame attempt at putting depth in what's essentially a grindsploitation filicide movie, but a) they are wrong b) i am right c) sorry your puny mortal minds aren't enlightened enough to understand horror as a medium for actual storytelling. These are the same reviewers complaining there's no ~EXPLANATION~ for the global parental heelturn. IT DOESN'T MATTER!!! & what you don't understand about literature could fill volumes

NO SEX SCENE EVERYBODY WHO SAYS THERE IS IS LYING TO YOU

if i had a nickel for every nicolas cage movie about parents being driven to murder their children by some unseen dark force i'd have two nickels which isn't a lot but it's weird it's happened twice

[yourcasualreligiousfanatic]

Watching community. On the 4tb season rn. Just wanted to put down some of my observations. The pilot characterisation is drastically different compared to the later seasons. Abed is functioning(he can read time, when later on he can't??? Tf??), but special quirky funny smart kinda way. Idk he seemed so much more mature compared to the later seasons. Dreamatorium, and all his schizo tendencies infantanlised him too much. Troy was the American football start still hung up about his high school life, young cool dumb and kinda stereotypically normal. He was rooted in reality, and could actually be a real person. But then they turned him into the other schizo sheep for their rainman duo. Dumbed him down and made him into a different character. Annie was supposed to be the young naive insecure girl unsure of sex...?ish. Like sheltered and unsure. She was worried about her social standing, popularity and shit. Shallow stuff, but again, real and relatable. Then she turned into... Bruh I don't even know. I guess one can argue that she grew up, and I guess Ill acclet that. She ok if guess, believable character growth that I honestly don't mind. Britta was smart, cold, strong, SMART OK?! she was independent and knew her worth. She was cooooollll as a cucumber. Like. What happened??😭😭😭😭 They made her so WEIRD WTF. Like she was sexy and cool bro, then she became dependent on guys(blade... Like, NAHHHH)and became dumb as shit. What the fuck, they did her so dirty, like frrrr lobotomised her. Like she was the girl you were intimidated of, but was still attracted to, and knew you had to put in a lot of effort into charming, but then she became some brain-dead retard. LMAOOO. Not exactly complaining about all of these changes btw, just kinda confused and a little sad. But wtv. Shirley was kinda the same. And Pierce too. Made him dumber tho, but maybe that's cuz he's just getting older and more senile. Idk, he's kinda funny.😭😭idk why ppl hate him so much, (yeah, he's homophobic, annoying asf, dumb, old, racist, everythingphobic, but that's funny bro, grow a thicker skin, Jesus fuck. Just cause your funny little show is full of cannon rainmans and rupauls, you don't get to filter out the guy.) think he's needed in the dynamic and he adds the flavour. Ppls shouldn't excluded him from their fanarts and stupid fanon shit I've been seeing. Idk, I think he's part of the group, they clearly care for him, and he's an important part, so idk. I guess ppl just seeing and selectively talking about what they want to see kind of pisses me off. But also, it's just a show, so I really shouldn't be so pressed, it's really not that deep. Ppl can do whatever they want, idc, and even if I did, no one else does. So. Jeff. Side note, he can stab me, beat me, gaslight me, manipulate me, hurt me, punch me, kick me, and I wouldn't mind. He cute asf.😭😭 And he was so cool and smart and aloof in the beginning. Twisting your words around like THAT. SO COOL. I have a thing for smart white guys with a little scruff and windblown hair. (House, and Lucifer spn, etc...) But yeah, he gets kind of lame later on. I hate that he starts having a heart and CARING for the ppl around him. Like....Ew....no. I wanted him to go back to being a cool heartless lawyer who cares about superficial things and thrives with other soulless bastards. Mmmm. Now that's sexy. Idk, he got so.... Lame. Lame lame lame. Not cool. No. Got less smart too. Hmmmm. There might be a direct correlation between coolness and intelligence.

Also, the banter of the show was smart and interesting and intricate and funny as hell. I'm not saying it still isn't(at least in season 4), but I feel like they put in a little less effort. The pilot was so good, so many iconic moments in ONE episode, so many good jokes I got pulled in LITERALLY the first scene. That's how good and consistent the jokes were.

Overall, I like what I'm seeing, really really funny show, so much fucking better than SUPERNATURAL. YES, IM STILL PISSED I WASTED SO MUCH TIME ON THAT HOT PILE OF GARBAGE. I love how much reference they put in there, the cinematography, filming styles, stylistic choices..... SOOOOOOO GOOODDD. I could cum, I love shows that do this type of shit. Documentary one ep, heist format, law and order, courtroom style drama, who dunnits, all so funny and Samer, they way they rewrite all these tropes to fit into a fucking COMMUNITY COLLEGE SETTING. WTFFF SO GOOD. I give it, so far at least, a 8.5/10. Yay.

[smolbeandrabbles]

Illicit Affairs - Harold x Reader (Adore)

Cruel Summer / Magnets / The Next Best Australian Record

GIF CREDIT: X

@wltz-bby​ @happyskywhale​

 Author’s Note: I know I said I was kinda finished with these two as far as I thought safe to take them.  Oh, but this song I haaaaaaad to...

So here’s another one on the list of ‘how long does it take you to write a fic’. I decided I was writing this on 8th October (when I wrote my plot notes. at like 11pm) then I wrote and finished it on 10th/11th.  Whereas sooooome stuff gets stuck in my drafts for like 6 months. And honestly I really don’t know how I do it. There’s a fic on my side blog that I turned around in 24 hours, which is another thing entirely but I am the most inconsistent writer! 😅🙈😬 I don’t know how you all put up with it, to be honest, but I’m glad you’re all here!

Ah shit we being and ‘end’ with Taylor again?! Ah well, can’t be helped!

Disclaimer: Adore/Adoration not mine / gif not mine / lyrics not mine

Premise: With Harold now divorced things get a little easier for a while, but you shouldn’t expect things to remain so un-convoluted for long, especially when you receive an invite to Tom’s wedding...

Words: 6418

Warnings: Sexual connotations / Sexual Pre-Amble / Swearing

_______ Make sure nobody sees you leave Keep your eyes down Tell your friends you're out for a run You'll be flushed when you return Take the road less traveled by Tell yourself you can always stop

And that's the thing about illicit affairs And clandestine meetings And longing stares It's born from just one single glance But it dies, and it dies, and it dies A million little times

Take the words for what they are A dwindling, mercurial high A drug that only worked The first few hundred times

And you wanna scream Don't call me kid Don't call me baby Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me You showed me colors you know I can't see with anyone else Don't call me kid Don't call me baby Look at this idiotic fool that you made me You taught me a secret language I can't speak with anyone else

And you know damn well For you I would ruin myself A million little times ---

Life all seemed a little easier after his divorce. You still had to be careful, that much was certain, but it didn’t feel like a full affair. The only attachment either of you had was each other. For you it felt like a weight was lifted - a worry. If you only had to worry about what your friends and the University would think if they found out, all that really mattered was being careful on campus. Surprisingly easy; longing glances in class could have meant anything (didn’t they all already know you had a massive crush?), but that ‘catch you later’ smile on his face was the best new thing. Not every night, but a few of them you would spend back at his place. It felt like a real relationship now, you’d found something meaningful. Now you could spend time with him off campus, you seemed to get even more careful on it. It wasn’t the only place you could touch him, hold him, kiss him anymore. You’d been concerned about him leaving you. The age gap in itself would give him more than enough reasons. But he didn’t; Harold stayed. And eventually it wasn’t just belief that he wouldn’t leave you, you knew he wouldn’t. So another year at university ended, and this summer was the first you’d spent between Sydney and home. Obviously, Harold wasn’t going to be coming back. And far be it from your parents to stop you from going back to see your friends. They were just glad to see you happy, and having your own adventures. And you did get to have adventures, even if you never left his house. Summer bled into another year of university, important as your final one, strange in every social context you could possibly think of. Unusually tough to balance �� and it made you only too glad to immerse yourself in your class work rather than your relationship. One of the blessings of Harold being that much older than you and having been there before (and heck as if he didn’t know about stressed and struggling university students), was that he understood and let you get on with what you thought was important. You still saw him, just not as often, and it affected nothing between you. Tom wanted to see more of his father, again that was understandable to you, but it was weird to see him kicking around Sydney and occasionally in your classes. On the instances you did bump into each other – and none of them very compromising, that you made sure of – you were civil. But there was never anything more to it than that, until Mary. Your first thought should obviously have been ‘I guess his girl back home didn’t work out’. Instead it was more about things becoming even more convoluted. Harold had come to you with the great idea that, as a final year and preparing to take that leap into the world of acting, you could mentor the lower years on your experience. Your mentee met your ex-boyfriend, and the next thing you knew they were dating. Harold thought it was hilarious, you weren’t so sure – but were at least prepared to see the ironically funny side. You certainly neglected to mention it any time you talked with her though. You weren’t sure you could get through a conversation without ‘Oh yeah and by the way he’s a cheater…’ Highly inappropriate! As you did start to consider your future seriously, the path you found yourself on came from an unexpected place. A new friend – a guy in class who you knew of, but had never really worked with. Stuck together for one of your many final projects, this wasn’t just about developing a few scenes – but a whole two-person stage play. It was like a light bulb moment, how well your energy and creative process and thinking matched. On the same page from the first moment, you weren’t sure which one of you had suggested doing this past your final year, but it seemed like the most logical thing in the world. As expected, Harold was nothing but supportive. Even joking that you’d get your work finished and produced before any of his. Before you hushed him with kisses and let him know how much you believed in him. Adding to your mad year, Harold also moved house – still beach front, modern and pretty. But it maintained a nice rustic aesthetic. Polished wood and steel. He whisked you up to see it before he’d even bought it – because apparently you got a say in things like this now. ‘Why? You’re the one living here.’ ‘I want you to still want to visit me.’ ‘I’d visit you if you were in a 1 bedroom flat with peeling paint and a leaky kitchen sink, you know that.’ ‘Yeah but, maybe it won’t always just be my house.’ You hoped he didn’t expect to be met with anything but joyful screaming at that. The very last thing – as if everything else wasn’t enough - was the final year production. Gruelling auditions were worth it once you got the main part, opposite your future business partner. It was nice, it was going to give you a taste of the future, a trial run. Harold unfortunately was in charge of the second years instead, but he brought Tom over to help manage it – no prizes for how he met Mary. Still, you went along to watch and support. Wondering how exactly you could make him a piece of the puzzle… proud of him and his vision. It made you nothing but excited for that original work of his to be complete – it would be nothing but an honour for you to star in it. Yet it also meant that he didn’t get to see yours until it debuted, and somehow having him on the front row provided you with a confidence boost. And that little wink he gave you as you took your bows gave you all the hints you needed about where your night was going… You wouldn’t lie to yourself anymore, Harold was everything you had always wanted. *** You gave it almost exactly a year after you had finished studying before you ‘came clean’ to your friends. Oh, you were never going to tell them the full details, and you certainly weren’t about to tell your parents everything: just that you were with someone, and you were happy… really happy. In your opinion that was all that should have mattered to them. Your friends were all incredibly shocked at first, but then supportive, and they instantly brought back some of their old favourite jokes ‘Holy shit! Good marks eventually DID get you in his pants after all!’ The truth was not the official line: You had met in a café like total coincidence just to catch up, once… twice… turning into a fair few times… turning into chemistry. Still totally weird, still with that age gap that made everyone (and you meant everyone) caution you, still this ‘he was your teacher once-!?’ that hung around. But not the truth, not that this had been going on so much longer than that. A story that you were both happy with – because no one ever needed to know the full story. And Harold was right about his house; although you had a small apartment across town you hardly stayed there – you spent all your time with him at his. You didn’t want to call it yours, didn’t dare speak the word ours until he did it first. But it always hung there, unspoken… Soon enough your friends grew to love him. How different things were out of the classroom, the conversations and interactions between them. Them all telling you that they finally got it – and then understood why, upon you meeting up again, why you’d hooked up. Which only had you pitying them for not seeing how gorgeous and amazing he was in the first place. There were a lot of shared evenings that happened around his house, where he’d let you invite your friends over but stayed well out of the way. Harold also let you invite them to his birthday though, and after the initial celebrations he and his friends stayed inside, whilst your friends stayed out on the porch. There was a chill in the air, but the fire was still going and you were all huddled together under blankets. As one by one his friends left and you were still sitting out giggling and sipping wine and beer, Harold came out to check you were all okay. Because he cared about them as much as you did. It made you love him even more, if that was at all possible. They probably loved that they could wind you up over this more than anything else, but that was fine for you, you knew it would take time for them to get used to the idea, although the tide was already turning; it was weird but they were also loving it. No one had left, somehow in all this madness you’d kept everything. It all seemed a little too good to be true sometimes, so you made sure to count all your blessings.

 Harold’s play still wasn’t finished; he always said he was almost there, but seemed to be taking an age to edit it all – he’d let you read nearly everything but the conclusion. “Why? Won’t I like it?” “I just want it to be the final-final version before you read that. I guess it’s more… thought provoking than satisfying.” So he kept you guessing. You’d become more of a stage actor than you’d ever expected… perhaps eventually you’d commit yourself to film and TV too. You’d done a few here-and-there episodes but nothing concrete. But it was the dynamic between you and your writing partner – who, if you were honest, was quickly turning out to be your best friend – that kept you in stage work. You’d started a small production company to write and produce these plays and they were pretty successful. But you’d also been included in other, sometimes large scale, productions. And, yes, as ever, Harold was front row for as many of these as he could be. You spent your spare time as you had before, tangled up with him, reading or writing together. With always the promise of: ‘Once I finish I’m casting you in this!’ and any time the school did a production, well… it was your turn to be front row for him.

*** Your joint influence on the people in your lives became more apparent, and also came as a surprise. To you at least. And your question was tentative even if you knew the answer already. “Harry… did you… get an invite to Tom’s wedding?” He pointed up to the fridge upon which was stuck the invite; very pretty, clearly there had been a lot of thought put into this and you would think a lot of effort would be put into such a wedding. You crossed the kitchen to look at it: Plus One, interesting. “Does he know?” “He knows I have somebody but not who, why?” By now he’d caught the piece of card you were holding in your hands, and you held it up. “I didn’t expect to get one myself, but here we are. I mean if I was going to be included at all, maybe I’d be on my parents one, but-” “Oh! Mary’s influence?” “Perhaps. I haven’t told her anything either, but why me? I’m his ex and I’m friends with her… but not very good friends.” “Family friends, maybe that’s it.” “A courtesy invite? I suppose it could be. But it’s not like my parents knew you and Roz that long, I didn’t grow up there like Tom and Ian-” You thought better of it and held that thought. You scored the invite with your nails, “Do you… want me to go?” Harold tilted himself back slightly, folding his arms, “Why? Are you thinking of not going?” “It’s not that, it’s that my parents are going. They’ve already discussed it with me, I’m certainly not ready to out this. And I don’t want you to spend your son’s wedding worrying about that. It’s a big day for him and you!” “Would you go anyway?” “Harry-” “It shouldn’t be about me.” “No, it should only be about you! Yes, I would like to go, but not if it makes more sense for me to stay away.” “Then accept and come.” You blushed gently, “Is that what you want?” “Of course I do. We can play it safe, geez, the last time we were around your family was when this started and was at its most dangerous. It’s not an affair anymore, you’re not my student anymore. If something happens then it happens, but look at you. You’re a star in your own right now, you’re an adult and your life is your life!” “It’s the family friends thing, they will go crazy. Even with the story line we made up, I doubt they’ll speak to me ever again.” “Do they know you’re seeing anyone?” “They’re vaguely aware.” Vaguely was certainly the operative word – more because you certainly expected for talk to get back to them that you had a relationship. You’d never made it sound serious to them, but you told them a little to sate their curiosity. “Well then,” He walked forward, cupping your face, “we’re on the same page and we’ll be fine.” “If you say so.” “I do, don’t you trust me?” You giggled, before leaning forward and grazing your lips to his, “No offense, but that’s a stupid question!” *** You were right, there was a lot of effort put into the wedding. There were less guests for the ceremony, but from what you’d been hearing there’d be quite the after party. As you were on your own invite, you also got the perks of a separate room to your parents. You didn’t hang around the wedding party when you arrived – you weren’t about to turn up here and make yourself a nuance - and it gave you time to relax and prepare yourself for tomorrow. You’d have to try to be on your very best behaviour, no matter what Harold had said, you didn’t want there to be any incidents. Your dress was in a colour that flattered you, covered in little appliques of your favourite flowers, sensible heels in the same colour. The opportunity to do your own make-up and hair; though you kinda missed having backstage stylists… The idea was simply to follow Harold’s lead, considering this was Tom’s wedding. He greeted you with familiarity; his ex-student who he’d seen in many a production since you’d graduated. He even seemed to indicate that you had in fact met up a few times just for general interest catch ups. To which Harold also added ‘maybe I’ll get you in to talk to my students sometime.’ Your parents did ask how exactly it was that you’d leave this detail out. ‘It’s just day to day stuff! You don’t tell me every time you see your friends-!’ Now, ‘friends’ wasn’t a word they questioned. You knew you weren’t going to get to sit next to him, but your family was sitting behind him and that was adequate, he might have only glanced back a couple of times, but they were enough to have you beaming. The ceremony was sweet, smooth sailing; they really did look in love. It gave you pause for thought – was that how you looked at Harold? Still? You’d been together a while now, but then you supposed so had Tom and Mary. Maybe that was just a wedding effect – after all, was there a more romantic day for two people? You also smiled a lot, it was such a lovely occasion to behold, even the atmosphere – like everyone was finally in the place they were meant to be. Which, considering the convoluted way this had all started that fateful summer, was fairly incredible. Harold placed his hand delicately on the small of your back, as you both left the chapel. “Don’t want you to think I don’t think you look beautiful…�� You nudged him gently, “If you’ll let me return the compliment.” He chuckled, “No.” “Yes! I mean that’s got to be one of the main reasons I’m here!” His cheeks turned pink and he looked a little bashful, removing his hand from you, far enough away from everyone else to sneakily lace your fingers behind your back instead, “But I mean it.” “Thank you, that’s very sweet… Yet I’m hardly the main spectacle. It’s all stunning and her dress is flawless.” “I don’t disagree, it’s very lovely. We have the rest of the day and the party yet.” “Well alright, I know you’re privy to everything.” You smiled, “I’m just happy you’re involved.” “Hmm. It’s humbling.” “You’re his father!” “He’s spent more time with Roz. Tom didn’t have to ask me.” “Well, I suppose you can’t change my opinion… As long as you know my opinions of you!” “Oh.” He let you go as you approached the drinks reception and winked, “Yes, I would think I did!” The drinks reception and dinner afterwards had exactly the same set of increasingly hilarious conversations. You weren’t always in ear shot of each other, or in the same social circles, but everyone wanted to know about the people you were respectively dating. You were a couple of drinks in, and became much more willing to open up – to the point where you were positively gushing about him. You gave your partner no name, age, or any of the questions they were asking that would be more revealing, but were more than willing to tell the rest of the story. And when you heard him being asked roughly the same questions - and sometimes you were standing together at these points - he was doing exactly the same thing. You were surprised one of you hadn’t broke out in a beaming smile or had glowed in sweet embarrassment yet. And yet it did make you feel so happy that Harold was happy to talk about you in the same way, and every so often you’d catch each other’s eyes and you would smile just like that. There was something about both being in on such a secret; you were happy you’d decided to come and be here – even if you weren’t with him, you were most definitely with him. You didn’t approach Tom and Mary until a little later but they were both so happy to see you. And you congratulated them with about as much enthusiasm. “First up you both look gorgeous! And this wedding is so beautiful… oh my gosh, you guys!” You hugged them both tight. “Congratulations, I’m so happy for you both!” “Hey,” Tom nudged you, “What’s this I’ve been hearing about you, though!? Get him married.” “AHaha-” You excused yourself from your laugh, “I mean I dunno I… maybe.” You quickly turned the conversation back on them, “You both look so joyful, and so great together. Enjoy it, alright.” You pointed to Tom, “Extra enjoy it for me, I’ll see where I go.” “Oh, I will!” He grinned, hugging you again. You wondered if he ever had told Mary that you’d dated. You supposed it wasn’t the relationship with him you needed to worry about so much. Mary pulled you back to her, “Thank you, so much!” “Oh, you were always star material…” you squeezed her tight, “But you’re welcome. Maybe we’ll get to be in a production together soon!” “I’ll hold you to that!” She giggled, wishing you well as you let her go. You breathed a sigh of relief as you made your way back to your parents, all’s well that ends well…

 ***

It was a little later, after the first dance, and when everyone was moving around the party freely: everything now in full swing and at least a few of them having already having had too much alcohol, that you realised your assumption was wrong. Some people here weren’t having a good time. You were alright to sit alone and observe for now. You’d known what you were getting into. Ian, best man and from what you’d been told by Harold the one to start this whole ball rolling, was sitting around rather dejectedly. You’d watched him intently for a little while, and he seemed to be getting confrontational with just about everyone – including your man. Now he just appeared to be sulking. So much for us all being more grown up now… Eventually you’d clearly stared at him long enough to have caught his eye, and you offered somewhere between a sympathetic and fed-up smile. Attempting to give an air of ‘yeah man, I know the feeling!’ considering you were also sitting here alone, but his face just scrunched into an even bigger frown as he huffed, crossing his arms before looking away. Okay then, sorry I tried! You weren’t left alone for much longer than that, as Harold wandered over. “Hey, you doing alright over here?” “Yeah, fine.” You waved off Ian, just in case he’d seen any of that brief exchange, “Just taking some quiet time.” “Well, that’s an awful lot of quiet time…” He held his hand out for yours, “Come on, come dance.” Your eyes immediately widened, and you looked from his hand to his face, “With you!?” “No, with someone else – yes, me!” “Harry, I don’t think that we should-” “I want you to enjoy yourself… c’mon.” You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath and praying this wasn’t the worst idea you’d ever had, as you placed your hand in his and he pulled you up.  “Think of it as like… a father daughter dance.” “Oh no, you just made it worse.” His laugh was embarrassed, “Oh, yeah I guess I did, didn’t I – sorry!” Harold didn’t try to make it romantic, although clearly because it was between you it was, and you supposed it was something a little reminiscent of ‘father of the bride’. Well, no one else – not even your family – was dancing with you, so why the hell not? Still you voiced the question. “Should we be doing this?” To which you were only presented with your own question: “Shouldn’t we really be beyond caring?” You couldn’t help but laugh, “You been drinkin’?!” “Not that much, give me some credit!” Oh, the want to pull him closer, your wish to lay your head on his shoulder and close your eyes as he swayed you gently on this dancefloor. To look into his eyes like you really wanted to, and were using all your self-control to make sure you weren’t. For him to just wrap you in his embrace right now. It didn’t happen, and you didn’t expect it to, but it hurt a little. Still, here you were and he was ‘holding’ you – it was as close as you were going to get, and you savoured every single second of his skin on yours. Eventually you did actually get to dance with your father and then some younger ‘gentlemen’ (though, whether you’d call them that…) cut in and you let them dance with you the way you wished that Harold could. At least you were enjoying yourself, to you that was the most important thing. But, you ended up back over by the drinks table with your actual other half, observing the party once more, and you broached the subject of the catalyst. “What did Ian say to you?” “Huh?” He turned, bottle half way to his lips. “I mean it looked like he was getting a little irate.” Harold just looked confused, so you sighed with an eyeroll, “Earlier!” “Oh.” Then he laughed, “Well clearly he’s the least happy person at this entire wedding, and he ironically said this was all my fault.” Your eyebrows raised, “Sorry!?” “Well I did take Mary to Tom’s 21st. So, I guess… that’s where they became a little more serious.” You snorted, “Holy shit. The wedding is your fault!? But what’s wrong with the-” you looked back out to the guests and then it clicked, “Everyone was growing up… You think they ended all the affairs at home?” He gave you a face to say he agreed with your deduction, “I’m glad we didn’t get the memo.” You only laughed, “I don’t think I would have agreed to the memo!” “Now we’re on the same page-!” **

You were standing outside on the patio, admiring the stars and lit scenery, when Tom caught up with you again. “Can I ask you something?” “Yes. And you just did.” That had him laughing, and you only slipped into chuckles too, he still liked how fast you were at quipping. Suddenly you were transported back – what would this have been if it didn’t become such a mess. “Your boyfriend…” “Mhm.” You straightened to the edge in his voice, and although Tom was looking at you seriously there was a hint of playfulness to his voice. “How long have you been together?” You couldn’t tell if he’d figured you out yet. “What if I said, it’s the same guy that I first mentioned to you in that massive argument we had?” He leant back against the railing, breathing out heavily. “I feel like I should have… figured it out before now.” “Considering I don’t know what you’ve figured out – you want me to help?” “It’s my dad, isn’t it.” It wasn’t even a question. You were a little affronted by his tone: “You don’t have to make it sound so creepy. In fact, if you want me to bring up glass houses…” He was a little taken aback that you’d just admit it, “Shit, you knew about-!?” “I told you I did. Yeah, that’s how this all started, you and Ian and…” you waved your hand and then pointed at yourself, “Only I stayed with mine… Geez, I’m sorry.” “Sorry?” He laughed, “Why?” “He’s… your dad. That’s not why I dated you, it’s just how it happened.” “You don’t have to explain!” He waved his hands around, “He’s happy, you’re happy, you’ve spent a lot of time together today, I have observed, and it just… I dunno, I guess it clicked. Everything he’s said about – well you – but his other half, and everything you’ve said.” “Oh, damn, is it obvious?!” “No. I just have all the pieces, don’t I?” “You’re… a little too cool with this.” “I told you we were cool before.” Tom’s look was significant, “We’re still cool. And I’m not gonna go telling everyone, until you’re ready to go do that yourselves. Besides,” he nudged you with a smile, “you seem to have enough dirt on me!” “Uh, I would never. You go off and enjoy your married life to an amazing woman, you idiot!” “I’ll do my best – but I’m never gonna call you mom!” “I’m just glad I’m older than you!” You folded your arms with a grin as he left you, with a wave, before turning back, “Why’s that!?” “The likely inevitability of grandbabies. I’m just gonna have to be the cool aunt or something!” You didn’t think you’d heard anyone laugh so loud in a long time. ***

It continued to get later, although the party was still going on and you could hardly take it anymore. You’d watched him move around in it all day, and now all you wanted was that suit on your hotel room floor, or his. That single button he’d undone and the slacked nature of his tie was nowhere near enough for you. But it was hard to let him know that when you couldn’t just go over and grab his hand; you had to just rely on glances and hope that he got it. And clearly he did, as he crossed the room back to you. Although instead of telling you that he was ready to go, he came with a cautionary tale. “We need to be careful about this.” “And your suggestion is?” “Well, we have to stagger when we leave, but you might want to say goodbye to people. Because your parents will notice you’re gone.” “Oh, your son isn’t gonna notice you’re gone, huh?” It was then Harold decided to tell you he’d seen your conversation with Tom, “Well he knows, doesn’t he.” It wasn’t a question, and you were stuck on how to respond, “I didn’t hear, but I saw you two. Is there anything you want me to say to him?” “…Well, that’s between you…” You lowered your eyes, “I didn’t tell him, he guessed.” “Sweetheart, it’s okay.” Harold couldn’t touch you, so his nickname made you look up. “I’ll talk to him, maybe not tonight… You go, I’ll watch you, wait for me.” You nodded and he gave you a gentle wink before you both headed in different directions. You had one more drink before you started to play the tired card – although really you were far from it – and said goodbye to your parents, a few of the others you knew here, and finally bride and groom before you headed off. Outside of the reception room the hotel was cool and quiet (you supposed it was pretty late) and you could take a breather, sliding out of your heels on the steps it felt so good to be back on the floor. You wandered slowly up the corridor and across hotel reception, you weren’t exactly sure whose room you were heading to, but nearly everyone was on the same floor and you were all certainly on the same wing. You were just finding your way up the steps on the other side of reception when you heard the footfall of smart dress shoes behind you, and turned to Harold saying a goodnight to the receptionist who had pulled night shift. He continued his pace as he caught you, turning up the corridor but not before turning back and wishing you a goodnight. You couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow: who were you keeping up appearances for now? Hotel staff? You shook your head and turned, finding him back at his room, apparently having trouble with his key.

“Would you like some help?” You slipped yourself between him and his room door. “If you would be so kind.” “Not sure I was talking about your room key…” You smirked, prising it from his hand, waiting for the beep to pull him to your lips by his tie, you stumbled backwards into the room as he pushed the door. Harold waited until it had closed to pull you into him, hands into your hair. It felt so good to have him touch you again, and you realised how much you’d yearned for it all day, as his hands moved down your neck and shoulders to your back, he continued to pull you closer. “God, I love you.” You almost whimpered it – kisses leaving you breathless, and you weren’t sure if that was because of the whole wedding atmosphere, or that you hadn’t had even a single chance to tell him face to face in nearly two days. But he needed to know, urgently. He chuckled, nuzzling your face with his own, “I love you too.” Your breath still caught every time he said it, even now. After having to wait so long for his first, there wasn’t anything any less special about it a hundred, a thousand, a million times later. He was still nothing ever but delicate with you, guiding you across his room to the bed before his hands collected on your shoulders again. Harold took a step back, the low level lighting set the perfect mood, but he moved his body so the moonlight could shine on you through the still open curtains. “You are so beautiful.” His fingers gathered under your chin, to keep you from shying away from his eyes as your own hands collected on his chest, ready to push his jacket down his arms. “You truly are.” As if he didn’t already affirm this nearly every day of his life, and Harold kissed you again. “Me?” Your instinctive reaction to flirting was always to nervously joke, “You look in a mirror, lately?” Harold shook his head before his lips traced yours again and he let you relieve him of his jacket, you were quick to unfurl his tie too. You stilled at the buttons of his shirt because his hands were back on your shoulders again and you relaxed your stance, releasing his lips to watch him push the straps of your dress down, guiding his hands across to the slight zip, he ghosted you a kiss in thanks before he let your dress fall to the floor. This time as you caught his collar to run through the buttons you kissed him harder, pushing your body into his – encouraging him to touch you and moaning into his kiss as you did so. His shirt was off quick and joined your dress as he deepened the kiss and you wound yourself around him, enjoying the taste on his tongue. Your kiss continued to get hot and heavy as your hands shot to his belt; he was no longer of the persuasion to stop you on bedroom thresholds, opening his body up for you to relieve him of it and undo his suit pants. Relenting as his hands caressed your back, finding your bra clasp; you always felt so fragile under those large hands of his, but all Harold ever did was take care of you. He lifted you gently from the floor and laid you both back in the sheets, kicking off his pants as he did so. You remained locked in your kiss as he caught you in an embrace, pulling your panties slowly down your legs, your breathing was a little shallower, at the friction of his hips against yours. You could hardly wait for him now, eagerly reliving him of his own underwear. “Shh shhh…” Harold gathered your hands in his, breaking the kiss and you whined, making him chuckle, “Darling, we have all night…” “…Harry…” The way you whined his name was delightful and that flicker across his eyes that he couldn’t control had you craving more of him, “please.” And you knew he wouldn’t deny you if you asked politely. “All night.” He repeated, and all you hoped was you weren’t going to be too loud when the other guests retired to their rooms for the evening. Hooking your leg over his hips he made sure you were completely comfortable before he entered you. You held him tighter, trying to stifle your moans in his skin. But he groaned gently too, and it was an exquisite little sound. In the comfortable quiet before you moved together, you kissed him gently again, reaffirming what you’d said before, “I love you.” Free to tell him all night now, you weren’t about to waste any opportunity. He rubbed his hands over your skin, sweet and delicate, “Darling I know… I’ve known that for a very long time.” He caught your lips once more, “I only hope I remain deserving of such love.” You weren’t sure why he occasionally said things like that to you, maybe sometimes he felt guilty about the whole thing, but you would only ever reassure him. He was deserving, and you knew he would always remain that way.

*** It was very early morning when you awoke, too much excitement in the air – even in the aftermath of the wedding - for you to sleep. You stood out on the balcony, watching the watery sky as the sun began to break through.  Harold was content to watch you from the bed as you were draped in his shirt and the bed sheet, looking out towards the ocean. There was always something about all these ocean views… He stood and half-dressed himself before joining you, he almost didn’t want to break the silence and how serene everything was. Harold opted instead to simply stand with you, caressing your exposed skin, stroking the small of your back delicately. You wore a soft smile, and although you weren’t looking at him, he knew that he was where all your focus stayed. Eventually you tilted yourself, so your head rested against him – and the noise you made was of content. The silence remained for a long time, because there was nothing for either of you to say. Why say ‘I love you’ when you’d spent your night showing each other how in love you were, and how much you appreciated the opportunity to be with each other… There was something even more beautiful about you in the afterglow, but Harold wasn’t sure he could handle just telling you that yet. There was something about the time of day, about the time you’d just spent with him, all the joy that surrounded the wedding that made you speak honestly. Something had weighed on you for a long time; it wasn’t a bad weight, just a muse you were almost too scared to voice. But after everything, right now felt like the best and only time to say it. So you did. “Is it crazy to want this... for me to wish this could be us one day?” You couldn’t look at him for fear of becoming so embarrassed that you’d stammer ‘forget it’ and run from the room. That perhaps all you would see in Harold was hesitation, and it might break your heart in two right then and there. You assumed his answer; that he would chuckle at you, and be as lovely with you as ever but tell you not to be so stupid – this wasn’t to be your fate. That wasn’t what Harold said, and the silence didn’t hang because he didn’t know what to say, but because what you’d voice demanded the gravitas and respect of a real answer, a thought out answer. He took a breath, looking out to the sky as you were, before smiling and taking your hand, pulling your body into his embrace and kissing the crown of your head. He kept his voice low and gentle, as delicate with you as ever. Why had you expected anything less? “No. I don’t think it’s that crazy at all.”

---

Thanks so much for reading 😘🤗

[foxilayde]

Any advice for a first-time smut writer that’s having some trouble? I have the plot already thought up and everything but for some reason it’s hard for me to actually write... 🥺 I’ve read a lot of your works (Nine is my favorite) and budcooper’s works and I can’t imagine writing anything as good as you guys do cuz my stuff is either me just staring at the page or writing awkward cheesy stuff, soooo... 👉👈

I'm so flattered you'd come to ME for smut writing advice! Let's just go with Nine for an example. The smut is where I STARTED, like a year ago, I had the idea for the whole plot already, but I had one scene in mind where reader is just like, "holy shit, Quinn wasn't exaggerating, he's GOOD at this." and then wrote like over a thousand words of internal monologue on how good Poe is at pussy eating.

What makes any story good, including smut, is conflict. You want to have some sort of struggle. It doesn't have to be a big struggle. For Nine, the struggle is 'hiding her true feelings from Poe' and 'being afraid of change'. That sort of stuff creates the inner dialogue; the learning, the growing, while the smut is happening. GOOD smut, I'm talking that top-tier shit, isn't just actions and sensations, it's... growth! It should be sex that's worth talking about.

My best advice is to think about the theme of your story; what your character WANTS, what do they NOT want, what are they afraid to ask for? What do they want the other person to THINK that they want? etc.

The best smut has a reason. Like, what are you trying to tell us about the human experience? Sex can be vulnerable, it can be emotional, it can make you feel better, make you feel worse. What can everyone relate to about this particular experience?

And think about the things that turn you on. Those little things that drive you crazy and try to describe them in great detail! Like, I love after kissing a person for a while how their lips are all swollen and wet and warm and like, plump and slippery with saliva and the way their lip can feel gliding between your teeth when you pull on their bottom lip with your teeth all soft and asykjaietoierj, stuff like that really sells it. Really try to recall those tiny moments and throw those in there, even if the reader might not be into it, you can SELL them on it by sort of describing why you like it so much, if that makes sense.

Also it really helps, but is not required, to be horny while you write.

[toomuchbroadwayquotes]

This might be ignored,its a long read, but if you want to have your forces restored on feminism my dead feminists i really wanted to share something that is making me tear up every 5 seconds.

As some of you might now, in my country (Brasil) we currently have a situation where our "president" is a misogynist (said he had a bunch of boys, they he went weak and have a daughter that's a "small" example for yall), homophobic ( said he would beat the gay out of his son if he ever "got it"), racist ( talking about killing native Indians and saying slaverism was a choice yadayada) anyways, just a piece of crap, we call him Bozo, like the clown. Well ever since his election we have been feeling so down (I'm sure my American friends can share the feeling). We are the country that kills more transexual people on the world. And it's not even illegal here, that would put into perspective. So, all this are real, serious problems, but bear with me as I get I little... naive maybe?. Well we had 20 seasons of BigBrother over here (Or BBB, Adding the Brasil at the end) and the show is on "the liberals tv channel, all the conservatives try to boycott it yadda yadda ") . But this season is just a gem. I feel like a revolution is happening and (I'm crying rn) I can't even put into words. Its gonna sound ridiculous, but you have to understand that 1) TV is a huge part of our culture, and is 100% connected with politics for us. 2)This show has been silencing woman, making men do anything they want without consequences and put woman as simple objects for their enjoyment. And somehow every year we wouldcomplain about how that was the reflection of our country. Something like this year edition NEVER HAPPENED BEFORE.

Our LGBT movies, Theather and books are being censoreds right now. Our country is on the verge of becoming a conservative doom.

The secretary of health system said :abstinence of sex is the best way to avoid DSTs and pregnancies. THATS HOW DEEP IN SHIT WE ARE. And we feel voiceless. Is like they are the majority you know?

Is like, you know when Katniss made every distric rebel by leading an example on the hunger games? Is THAT KIND OF SHIT. So, firsts things first:

I will introduce you the leaders of our current feminist movement

First, Thelma, she is not just ya regular powerful black queen. She is a doctor, with a bunch of degrees on stuff I can't even pronounce,she is specialized on anesthesia and she is a resident like those bad ass ones in grey's anatomy. She she is A BOSS. She is strong, and even though she is not 100% familiar with the feminism in "theory" she lives it in practice with out even knowing it ( now she knows, cause the other two are teaching her!) I want to make clear that on this reality show, the majority of the public has always been racist, and black people normally are eliminated first, yes it sucks and is one of the reasons I stopped watching a long time ago, as most of us millenials, but thank God we came back. She isn't going ANYWHERE CUZ WE ARE NOT LETTING THAT HAPPEN.

The second one is Marcela, every since the first we saw her she said loud and clear:I AM A FEMINIST, she is also a Doctor. She calls her self doctor unicorn, she is an OB/GYN and choose her career because she wanted to fully support her transexual brother /yess/, she is also expert on female sexuality and give classes about it, think Carina Deluca. She also takes care of sexual abuse victims. Oh yeah, she is bisexual as well. And everyone is shipping her with the next one btw.

Now our last warrior: Gizelly, She is a Lawyer, and she advocates for woman, she has suffered all the types of abuse from her ex husband and after all the trauma, she decided no one would do that to her again. Feminist, we call her the hurricane, she just shoots fire and defends any woman that is being belittled.

What happened was, some guys decided they would "seduce"any woman who was in a relationship outside the reality show, so they would look bad, and be eliminated easily. Wellx those 3 heard that, and they just couldn't get quiet. They went and tell all the girls about it. Some of them didn't believe them, the guys said they were CRAZY, and were LYING (what a shock)

The confrontation scene:

So one of them said: If I am lying, I will be eliminated this round. If I'm back, then you are the lier. So, regular reality show stuff right?

Here are some things you should know: Marcela, the leader ( as she was the one with the initiatives) was anonymous when she first got on the show, and 13 days later, she had 2 MILLION FOLLOWERS. Every feminist, every LGBT+ and ally on this country just woke up ya know?. We were all mad as hell that they were being treated as liars, but, and that's a HUGE but, the guy mentioned earlier was against one that was even worse. He was touching inappropriately the girls while they were completely DRUNK at the parties ( they wouldn't remember later), he was the one who actually made said plan mentioned before, but they didn't knew at the house because he was a completely different person when he was alone with the guys. A complete scumbag, he mocked and made fun of every woman on the house because of their looks etc. Sooo, all those millions of feminists watching were like : "do we take the biggest jerk and make the girls think we think they are lying or ?" Well, we decided to take the bigger toxic monster first, and left the other one for the next. But we had a special card. Every year, after the show starts, they put a glass house in the middle of a mall, with 4 candidates inside, we vote for 2 of them to be on the actual show yada yada. What happened was:people started showing off by the mall, with posters, begging for whomever got in the house to :"PLEASE TELL THE GIRLS EVERYONE BELIEVE THEM. THAT THEY ARE NOT LYING. THAT THEY HAVE MILLIONS OF SUPPORTERS. THAT HE ONLY CAME BACK BECAUSE THE OTHER WAS WORSE ETC"

So, last night was elimination day, the worst one got out with 80% elimination A victory for us (there were 4 people on this run, and one of them is a Black guy, fat, older than everyone else, and by history, he would obviously be the first eliminated but he was the one with LESS VOTES. AGAIN THIS IS UNPRECEDENTED IN OUR COUNTRY SPECIALLY SINC THE FOURTH PERSON COMPETING IS A CARISMATIC YOUNG KOREAN MAGICIAN YOUTUBER WITH A NETWORTH OF MILLIONS, BUT THE BLACK GUY WAS LESS VOTED THAN HIM, GUYS I CAN'T STOP WRITING IN CAPS.The second worst one tho, comeback celebrating, saying he knew he was right. Singing victory. The girls were crashed. No one understood and they all started crying and talking about how it was a reflection of our country, but that they wouldn't change their ideals etc. (Again, they didn't knew everything trash bag number one did, cuz he did it in secret so they thought it was an answer)... well, 2am, the couple from the glass house got in. And they told them. They said everything. How the public loves them, and the why the other one got out first, and how we knew they were saying the truth. This part is just a sweet ending for y'all. They then proceeded to get all the woman in one bedroom and talked and talked, they even explained to the ones who had some deep patriarchal mindset and were believing the boys up until that point, they had conversations about feminism, about not accepting to be treated that way, they cried, they were so relieved, it's silly because is a reality show, but last night everyone felt like we were supported. Like, people got our backs! People agree that we wont take that bullshit anymore. In other editions those guys would be the handsome guys that all the girls would die to be with, you know? But know they are the villains. It happened. The girls are not the crazy ones. They are not the powerless wones. They were the STRONG ONES forming OPINIONS, moving the big pieces on the board.

I can't even talk about how this will impact on many young girls, especially with all those girls having such strong stories you know? Today is a reality show but whatch us on the booting vote! Watch us at the March's. Just watch us. I'm telling y'all. Brasil is gonna turn this shit upside down.

Anyways here is a little clip of when our guardian Angel Dan, told the girls that they should trust Marcela's word

The relief the felt, we all felt. Having your word taken seriously after being called crazy and lier...

( even the production of the show tryied to deny the guys plan was real before the videos started pouring up, and they had to take back after saying on national television that Marcela was lying. Because that was the standard)

[oceanivoxjoquainx]

Let's talk about Eric Effiong

Let's be honest Eric's storyline and characterization is one of the most appealing out of all the characters in Sex Education periodt. A true gay, fierce, Drag QUEEN and I feel like ranting about this amazing force of nature. (Spoilers. Duh.)

When I saw the trailer for Sex Education it didnt even hit me that Eric was gay until I read the synopsis. Was just like "Oh I wonder which one of these three mains are the gay one people keep talking about" even after I saw him in drag like a dumbass 😣😂. Personally im glad we've reached a point where gay guys aren't overly feminine and even the brightest colours won't differ a character from the rest (unless I'm just a blind bish and he was obviously gay from the trailer) ei 👏🏾 ther 👏🏾 way; his character was refreshing when I started watching the show. I immediately clicked with him and knew what every look he gave or hand gesture he did meant. Felt nice. When Adam pushed him into the locker for the first time and started with the heterohomoerotic bs I knew that Adam had a raging boner for Eric and was another internalized homophobic bully™ and wasn't really excited for what was to come but I knew it was coming and tbh I liked it in the end.

Eric and Otis' friendship is so pure. Like?!? Get me a straight supportive bestie lilke Otis? Ik they fought but even then Otis was respectful and kept his boundaries and let Eric go through the motions before immediately belting into an apology at the first chance he got. Their dancing scene?!? Iconic. The fact that Eric sees Otis' house as safe and another home?!? Iconic. Otis going drag with Eric to watch an LGBT+ movie as a TRADITION (meaning they've done it numerous times)?!?! Iconic. The fact that Otis was straight up ditching Eric and Eric STILL tolerated him and let him do his thing without too much pressure!?! The most iconic of them all. Just pure love and respect all around.

I am so proud of Erics growth over the course of the season starting from a naive and scared gay doormat to facing homophia and getting beat up by those assholes on his birthday no less to losing his best friend and becoming depressed to channeling that anger into defending himself when people tried him to getting his sparkle back and coming back more fierce that ever before.

Speaking of him getting his sparkle back lets talk about that and why that scene is so important. A random guy asked Eric for directions and Eric noticed his nails were polished and the guy was wearing earrings and he was a big ole black dude. He was like Eric. When Eric noticed that the guy was out, loud, glamorous and proud he immediately switched back into the bright colourful and wonderfully gay Eric we all know and love.

THIS IS WHY REPRESENTATION MATTERS!!!!

It shows people that its okay to be who they actually are and inspires those who are lost to find or return to their true selves. Representation isn't just some offhand thing to throw on a character last minute. And even if you can relate to other characters who arent like you, it is always an amazing feeling to have a character that IS like you. It turned Eric from a popularity seeking doormat into a hurricane with 6 inch heels who was ready to straight up beat down a bully he's had for 4 years. It even inspired him to go back to church and rejoin a community that he closed off. That's exactly how it feels to have someone successful in the media and your life to look up to. Eric only interacted with that man for a few minutes but those few minutes changed his life for the better. So that's a lovely reminder for all who love to bash representation.

Back tracking to Eric's dull colourless period after the attack and his fight with Otis. It was saddening to see one of the brightest characters go dull and even the school felt it. He turned from a guy who rarely stood up for himself and what he wanted into the sass master he reserved only for his friends. All of his built up anger was released causing him to explode on Mr Hendricks (who is adorable tbh and just trying to do his best) and Anwar (I was proud of that punch you go glenn co co) and he even sounded off on his dad who he's usually passive aggressive to at worst. Just goes to show that the happiest faces can harbor the biggest pains and can snap. Moral of the story? Protect the happy few.

Eric also has a great family. Like that obviously know Erics gay and wears dresses because its all right there in his room which his parents enter at their leisure and while it seems that they're a bit homophobic its revealed that they (Erics dad at least) just wants Eric to be safe as he's already a target for being black and apart of an immigant family. He accepts Eric for who he is and what he does he just doesnt want anyone else to give him shit for it and if that's not one of the sweetest things in this world idek what is. Eric and his dad was probably one of my favorite dynamics in the show and watching his dad slowly fully accept that his son was strong and able to stand for himself he was able to become stronger too. This dynamic is important because I never see any gay black characters have a close relationship with their fathers and it was very heartwarming to watch.

Now onto Erics love life. He has a crush on the highschools other only gay guy Anwar who's the typical mean sassy gay we've all come to expect in highschool dramas. Otis saying that Eric doesnt have to have a crush on the only other openly gay guy at school was such a mood as its commonly shown that any gays in close proximity should get together. When Eric punched him I internally went "Finally!" Because all those jeers were becoming annoying. I'm glad Anwar got to come out to his mum over it though. And straight up told the audience that Eric didn't like feminine guys (alluding to him and Adams eventual clean up scene as of we didn't see it coming already).

Moving on to Adam tho, like I said we all been knew that this

was indeed coming and even though I hate the bully x bullied trope I still ended up liking it and hoping that Adam would change. The building up to that kiss was long awaited from episode 1 straight through to 8 with all the longing looks that Adam kept side glancing Eric with and the face cupping and the growls and the lingering touches. I just kept going sthdjksksbslaldbd when one of those moments happened followed shortly after with disgust because gays falling for their abuser is washed up but then immediately going back to jajaklamabsldkd because im shipping trash so 🤷🏿. Eric stepping to Adam in at the ball was one of the most iconic scenes of the show (along with the "Its My Vagina" scene) and the exchange between him and Adam gave be actual chills. The tension was THICCCC. Erics OUTFIT to the ball gave me chills 😭😭 dude came to slay and had everyone at that school proper shook and I honestly could NOT be more proud. I was hoping Adam would become a better person over the course of the season but nope so hopefully they cover all the issues that Adam has in season 2 and properly give him a redeption arc cuz he's still a trashy pos he's just a disaster bi on top of it. (Adam immediately going to suck Eric off is confidence I can only dream of achieving 💀💀) The lab scene was also cute but made me mad because how could Adam look scared, confident and still be a douchebag all in the span of a few seconds was beyond me. A+ acting on Connor Swindells part. I can see why Adam would have to stay in the closet and keep their... relationship?? a secret because it seems like Headmaster Groff would be a homophobic piece of shit and would add to the ever growing list of things Adam did wrong. Even so it doesn't excuse the fact that Adam is in fact a bully and Eric deserves much better. Was sad seeing Adam being driven off from Eric in the end tho. Eric thought that Adam didn't want to see him at all and was probably heartbroken and probably thinks Adam left because of him (my poor baby 😭😭). I feel bad for Adam too because he was just starting to express himself and was at the beginning of a redemption arc when he was just wisked away from the boy he's loved for what seems to be a very long time. I just want my boys to be happy and non toxic and I wish their relationship and them all the best in Season 2.

Eric Effiong is my favorite character in the show and I really want to thank Ncuti Gatwa for portraying him so well and for the shows writers who gave him a very fleshed out character with an amazing storyline and conclusion. His growth was incredible and his strength is immeasurable. I'm 100% certain that he will be a character the community remembers for years to come. Patiently now waiting on what's to come in Season 2 💙🙌🏾.