#I ONLY HAVE ONE FINAL LEFT | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

peace-hunter · 2 months ago

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tfone au where OP is created as the last of the primes but way after them, a sparkling born at what were thought to be the last days of the war against the quintessons, the beginning of a new generation of peace after eons of war. a child meant to be loved and raised knowing nothing of war nor sacrifice.

he's kept mostly out of the spotlight by his siblings, who don't wish to expose him to everyone's optics so young, and want to wait until the war is done and over to properly introduce him to their people.

except of course the primes are betrayed and murdered by sentinel, the war is lost and everyone who knows and cared for the truth is either banished or outright killed in order to suppress it.

and the high guard, the ones the primes trusted the most, the ones that were supposed to protect them, the ones who failed in their most important duty, have to make a choice. to take the last prime, their last hope, with them to the surface, a hostile environment where there's little to no supplies and where they'll be hunted down by both sentinel and the quintessons as the biggest threat to their regimen.

or hide him in plain sight. place him where sentinel won't think to look for him. one more sparkling among many. and hope it will be enough to keep him alive. pray to primus that he'll protect his last child long enough for them to come back for him when it's safer (even if most of them have already lost their faith on him when he allowed the rest of his children to be massacred like that)

they almost lose their resolve when they realize they will have to take the little one's cog away in order to make him blend in with the rest of the newborns (and oh do they burn with murderous intent when they see what sentinel has done to their people but it's not the time yet-) but in the end they decide an impaired little prime is better than a dead one.

and so in the chaos of thirteen dead primes and a sudden energon crisis, a little sparkling who very few mechs really knew about and even fewer had seen completely vanishes. and in the depths of iacon a mech in charge of a new batch of newborns scratches their helm in confusion as they realize they must have miscounted the first time.

optimus prime is quietly erased from any official records by sentinel, written off as dead when they find a sparkling's frame mangled beyond recognition after an attack on the base of those rebels that insist on being a thorn on his side. killing the sparkling hadn't been precisely in his plans, he probably could've found some use for it after all, but he's not particularly upset about it either.

and orion pax grows up with an ache on his spark that tells him he's missing something far more important than a t-cog and dreams of gentle and loving hands, cradling him against the frames of mechs he cannot recall the faces of.

#i talk a lot <3 #transformers #transformers one #tfone #optimus prime #orion pax #baby prime orion au #this is mostly an excuse for me to draw the primes and baby OP later on. just to be clear.#i WILL be drawing this at some point lmao #tbh i'm a little uncertain how i want things to progress #because on one hand it would be very tasty and tense if sentinel recognized optimus during the race #but that means a lot of changes very early on in the plot and i would have to do a lot of Thinking on how to justify getting the gang #to still pick up bee and elita. cause i love them <3 #i do think it'd be very funny if the high guard's plan worked like a charm except for the very tiny fact that they didn't count #on orion being an absolute hellion. like. this kid is Not Going Unnoticed and it's completely his own fault lmao #in this version maybe a member of the high guard stayed behind to keep an eye on orion and is able to get them out before they're killed #but instead of taking them to where the primes fell they take them directly to the high guard #which is very awkward because it's a very moving and emotional moment for the high guard who are finally reunited with their little prime #all grown up and healthy and blessedly *alive*. except orion doesn't fucking remember any of them and is very confused as to why #the legendary warriors of cybertron are getting all weepy over him. they finally explain the truth to him which is a Fucking Bomb #to drop on anyone but especially a group of kids who almost got killed by the person they all thought the world of just hours ago #they also return orion's t-cog to him which would create some tension between him and the rest of the gang because this time #he's the only one getting his cog back. add to it that they were just told he's the equivalent of a demi-god and... well.#there's a gap between him and them that wasn't there before #on the other version of events that follows canon more closely everything goes the same up until the gang finds the primes in the cave #and wake up alpha trion who now not only has to deal with the fact the rest of his siblings are dead but that he missed fifty cycles #of his baby brother's life. that the only sibling he has left does not remember him or his true identity at all.#he has to choose between telling him the truth which has the risk of unbalancing him in a critical moment where he cannot afford to #be distracted because they're being hunted down. or let him remain unaware. let him forget their family and the love they had for him #but letting him remain free of the knowledge of what he lost and the heartbreak it would bring.

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fatehbaz · 11 days ago

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patience being tested. being forced by a bizarre unfortunate situation to adhere to university requirement technicality by taking this simple basic elementary "introduction to environmental history" class.

this class is from facilitators/program which do, like, "history of the American frontier" or "history of fishing and hunting" and still basically subscribe to that old-school twentieth-century idealization and celebration of characters like Teddy Roosevelt and reverence for a mythical arc-of-history-bent-towards-justice narrative of the often-clumsy but ultimately-benevolent US federal government and its mission to "save nature" through the miracle of "sustained yield," while heroic federal land management agencies and "heritage" institutions lead to way, staffed by exceptional individuals (appeals to nostalgia for the frontier and an imagined landscape of the American West; ego-stroking appeals to flattering self-image that center the environmentalist or academic). where they invoke, y'know, ideas like "ecology is important because don't you enjoy cross-country skiing in The Woods with your niece and nephew? don't you like hunting and fishing?" which makes it feel like a time capsule of appeals and discourses from the 1970s. and it invokes concept of "untouched wilderness" (while eliding scale of historical Indigenous environmental relationships and current ongoing colonial violence/extractivism). but just ever-so-slightly updated with a little bit of chic twenty-first-century flair like a superficial land acknowledgement or a reference to "labor histories" or "history from below," which is extra aggravating when the old ideologies/institutions are still in power but they're muddying the water and diluting the language/frameworks (it's been strange, watching words like "multispecies" and "Anthropocene" over the years slowly but surely show-up on the posters, fliers, course descriptions, by now even appearing adjacent to the agri-business and resource extraction feeder programs, like a recuperation or appropriation.) even from a humanities angle, it's still, they're talking at me like "You probably didn't know this, but environmental history is actually pretty entangled with political and social events. In fact, we can synthesize sources and glean environmental info from wacky places like workers' rolls in factories, ship's logs, and poetry from the era." and i'm nodding like YEP.

the first homework assignment is respond to this: "Define and describe 'the Anthropocene'. Do you think 'the Anthropocene' is a useful concept? Why or why not?" Respond in 300 words.

so for fun, right now in class, going to see how fast i can pull up discussion of Anthropocene-as-concept solely from my old posts on this microblogging site.

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ok, found some

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I think that the danger in any universal narrative or epoch or principle is exactly that it can itself become a colonizing force. [...] I’m suspicious of the Anthropocene as concept for the very reason that it subsumes so many peoples, nations, histories, geographies, political orders. For that reason, I think ideas like the Anthropocene can be a useful short-hand for a cluster of tangible things going on with the Earth at the moment, but we have to be very careful about how fluid and dynamic ideas become concretized into hegemonic principles in the hands of researchers, policymakers, and politicians. There’s so much diversity in histories and experiences and environmental realities even between relatively linked geographies here in Canada [...]. Imagine what happens when we try to do that on a global scale - and a lot of euro-western Anthropocene, climate change and resilience research risks doing that - eliding local specificities and appropriating knowledge to serve a broader euro-western narrative without attending to the inherent colonial and imperial realities of science and policy processes, or even attending to the ways that colonial capitalist expansion has created these environmental crises to begin with. While we, as a collective humanity, are struggling with the realities of the Anthropocene, it is dangerous to erase the specific histories, power-relations, political orders that created the crisis to begin with. So, I’m glad that a robust critique of the Anthropocene as a concept is emerging.

Text by: Words of Zoe Todd, as interviewed and transcribed by Caroline Picard. “The Future is Elastic (But it Depends): An Interview with Zoe Todd.” 23 August 2016.

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The Great Acceleration is the latest in a series of human-driven planetary changes that constitute what a rising chorus of scientists, social scientists, and humanists have labeled the Anthropocene - a new Age of Humans. [...] But what the Anthropocene label masks, and what the litany of graphs documenting the Great Acceleration hide, is a history of racial oppression and violence, along with wealth inequality, that has built and sustained engines of economic growth and consumption over the last four centuries. [...] The plantation, Sidney Mintz long ago observed, was a “synthesis of field and factory,” an agro-industrial system of enterprise [...]. Plantation legacies, along with accompanying strategies of survival and resistance, dwell in the racialized geographies of the United States’ and Brazil’s prison systems. They surface in the inequitable toxic burdens experienced by impoverished communities of color in places like Cancer Alley, an industrial corridor of petrochemical plants running along the Mississippi River from New Orleans to Baton Rouge, where cotton was once king. And they appear in patterns of foreign direct investment and debt servitude that structure many land deals in the Caribbean, Brazil, and sub-Saharan Africa [...]. [C]limatologists and global change scientists from the University of London, propose instead 1610 as a date for the golden spike of the Anthropocene. The date marked a detectable global dip in carbon dioxide concentrations, precipitated, they argue, by the death of nearly 50 million indigenous human inhabitants [...]. The degradation of soils in the tobacco and cotton-growing regions in the American South, or in the sugarcane growing fields of many Caribbean islands, for example, was a consequence of an economic and social system that inflicted violence upon the land and the people enslaved to work it. Such violent histories are not so readily evident in genealogies that date the Anthropocene’s emergence to the Neolithic Revolution 12,000 years ago, the onset of Europe’s industrial revolution circa 1800, or the Trinity nuclear test of 1945. Sugarcane plantations were already prevalent throughout the Mediterranean basin during the late middle ages. But it was during the early modern era, and specifically in the Caribbean, where the intersection of emerging proto-capitalist economic models based on migratory forced labor (first indentured servitude, and later slavery), intensive land usage, globalized commerce, and colonial regimes sustained on the basis of relentless racialized violence, gave rise to the transformative models of plantations that reshaped the lives and livelihoods of human and non-human beings on a planetary scale. [...] We might, following the lead of science studies scholar Donna Haraway and anthropologist Anna Tsing, more aptly designate this era the Plantationocene. [...] It is also an invitation to see, in the words of geographer Laura Pulido, “the Anthropocene as a racial process,” one that has and will continue to produce “racially uneven vulnerability and death." [...] And how have such material transformations sustained global flows of knowledge and capital that continue to reproduce the plantation in enduring ways?

Text by: Sophie Sapp Moore, Monique Allewaert, Pablo F. Gomez, and Gregg Mitman. "Plantation Legacies." Edge Effects. 22 January 2019. Updated 15 May 2021. [Bold emphasis added by me.]

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Geologists and other scientists will fight over [the definition of the beginning start-date of the Anthropocene] in scientific language, seeking traces of carbon dioxide that index the worst offenses of European empire which rent and violated the flesh, bodies, and governance structures of Indigenous and other sovereign peoples in the name of gold, lumber, trade, land, and power. [...] The stories we tell about the origins of the Anthropocene implicate how we understand the relations we have with our surrounds. In other words, the naming of the Anthropocene epoch and its start date have implications not just for how we understand the world, but this understanding will have material consequences, consequences that affect body and land.

Text by: Heather Davis and Zoe Todd. On the Importance of a Date, or Decolonizing the Anthropocene. ACME An International Journal for Critical Geographies. December 2017. [Bold emphasis added by me.]

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From Aime and Suzanne Cesaire, C. L. R. James, Claudia Jones, Eduoard Glissant, through Sylvia Wynter, Christina Sharpe, and so many others, critical anticolonial and race theory has been written from the specific histories that marked the Black Atlantic. [...] Glissant also reminds us, secondly, of how cunning the absorptive powers of [...] liberal capitalism are - how quickly specific relations are remade as relations-erasing universal abstractions. [...] This absorptive, relations-erasing universalism is especially apparent in some contemporary discourses of […] liberalism and climate collapse - what some call the Anthropocene - especially those that anchor the crisis in a general Human calamity which, as Sylvia Wynter has noted, is merely the name of an overdetermined and specific [White] European man. […] [T]he condition of creating this new common European world was the destruction of a multitude of existing black and brown worlds. The tsunami of colonialism was not seen as affecting humanity, but [...] these specific people. They were specific - what happened to them may have been necessary, regrettable, intentional, accidental - but it is always them. It is only when these ancestral histories became present for some, for those who had long benefitted from the dispossession [...], that suddenly the problem is all of us, as human catastrophe.

Text by: Elizabeth Povinelli. “The Ancestral Present of Oceanic Illusions: Connected and Differentiated in Late Toxic Liberalism.” e-flux Journal Issue #112. October 2020.

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The narrative arc [of White "liberal humanism"] [...] is often told as a kind of European coming-of-age story. […] The Anthropocene discourse follows the same coming-of-age [...] script, searching for a material origin story that would explain the newly identified trajectory of the Anthropos […]. Sylvia Wynter, W.E.B. DuBois, and Achille Mbembe all showed how that genealogy of [White subjecthood] was [...] articulated through sixteenth- through nineteenth-century [historiographies and discourses] in the context of colonialism, [...] as well as forming the material praxis of their rearrangement (through mining, ecological rearrangements and extractions, and forms of geologic displacements such as plantations, dams, fertilizers, crops, and introduction of “alien” animals). […] As Wynter (2000) commented, “The degradation of concrete humans, that was/is the price of empire, of the kind of [Eurocentric epistemology] that underlies it” (154).

Text by: Kathryn Yusoff. “The Inhumanities.” Annals of the American Association of Geographers, Volume 11, Issue 3. November 2020.

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As Yarimar Bonilla suggests in regard to post-Irma-and-Maria Puerto Rico, “vulnerability is not simply a product of natural conditions; it is a political state and a colonial condition.” Many in the Caribbean therefore speak about the coloniality of disaster, and the unnaturalness of these “natural” disasters [...]. Others describe this temporality by shifting [...] toward an idea of the Plantationocene [...]. As Moore and her colleagues write, “Plantation worlds, both past and present, offer a powerful reminder that environmental problems cannot be decoupled from histories of colonialism, capitalism, and racism that have made some human beings more vulnerable [...].” [W]e see that contemporary uneven socioecologies associated with the rise of the industrial world ["the Anthropocene"] are based [...] also on the racialized denial and foreshortening of life for the sacrificial majority of black, brown, and Indigenous people and their relegation to the “sacrifice zones” of extractive industry. [...] [A]ny appropriate response to the contemporary climate emergency must first appreciate its foundations in the past history of the violent, coercive, transatlantic system of plantation slavery; in the present global uneven development, antiblackness, and border regimes that shape human vulnerability [...] that continues to influence who has access to resources, safety, and preferable ecologies [...] and who will be relegated to the “plantation archipelagoes” (as Sylvia Wynter called them) [...].

Text by: Mimi Sheller. “Thinking Beyond Coloniality: Toward Radical Caribbean Futures.” Small Axe (2021), 25 (2 (65)), pages 169-170. Published 1 July 2021. [Bold emphasis added by me.]

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Indigenous genocide and removal from land and enslavement are prerequisites for power becoming operationalized in premodernity [...]; it was/is a means to operationalize extraction (therefore race should be considered as foundational rather than as periphery to the production of those structures and of global space). [...] Wynter suggests that we […] consider 1452 as the beginning of the New World, as African slaves are put to work on the first plantations on the Portuguese island of Madeira, initiating the “sugar-slave” complex - a massive replantation of ecologies and forced relocation of people […]. Wynter argues that the invention of the figure of Man in 1492 as the Portuguese [and Spanish] travel to the Americas instigates at the same time “a refiguring of humanness” in the idea of race. [...] The natal moment of the 1800 Industrial Revolution, […] [apparently] locates Anthropocene origination in […] the "new" metabolisms of technology and matter enabled by the combination of fossil fuels, new engines, and the world as market. […] The racialization of epistemologies of life and nonlife is important to note here […]. While [this industrialization in the nineteenth century] […] undoubtedly transformed the atmosphere with […] coal, the creation of another kind of weather had already established its salient forms in the mine and on the plantation. Paying attention to the prehistory of capital and its bodily labor, both within coal cultures and on plantations that literally put “sugar in the bowl” (as Nina Simone sings) […]. The new modes of material accumulation and production in the Industrial Revolution are relational to and dependent on their preproductive forms in slavery […]. In 1833, Parliament finally abolished slavery in the British Caribbean, and the taxpayer payout of £20 million in “compensation” [paid by the government to slave owners for their lost "property"] built the material, geophysical (railways, mines, factories), and imperial infrastructures of Britain and its colonial enterprises and empire. [...] A significant proportion of funds were invested in the railway system connecting London and Birmingham (home of cotton production and […] manufacturing for plantations), Cambridge and Oxford, and Wales and the Midlands (for coal). Insurance companies flourished [...]. The slave-sugar-coal nexus both substantially enriched Britain and made it possible for it to transition into a colonial industrialized power […]. The slave trade […] fashioned the economic conditions (and institutions, such as the insurance and finance industries) for industrialization.

Text by: Kathryn Yusoff. "White Utopia/Black Inferno: Life on a Geologic Spike". e-flux Journal Issue #97. February 2019. [Bold emphasis added by me.]

#sorry for being mean #instructor makes podcasts about cowboys HELP ME #and he recently won a New Business award for his startup magazine covering Democrat party politics in local area HELP #so hes constantly performing this like dance between new hip beerfest winebar coolness and oldfashioned masculinity #but hes in charge of the certificate program so i have to just shut up and keep my head down for approximately one year #his email address is almost identical to mine and invokes enviro history terms but i made mine long before when i was ten years old #so i could log in to fieldherpforum dot com to talk about enviro history of distribution range changes in local reptiles and amphibians #sir if you read my blog then i apologize ive had a long year #and i cant do anything to escape i am disabled i am constantly sick im working fulltime i have NO family i have NO resources #i took all of this schools graduate level enviro history courses and seminars years ago and ran the geography and enviro hist club #but then left in final semester because sudden hospitalization and crippled and disabled which led to homelessness #which means that as far as any profession or school is concerned im nobody im a retail employee #i was doing conference paper revisions while sleeping on concrete vomiting walking around on my cane to find outdoor wifi #and im not kidding the MONTH i got back into a house and was like ok going back to finish the semester the school had #put my whole degree program and department in moratorium from lack of funding #and so required starting some stuff from scratch and now feel like a hostage with debt or worsening health that could pounce any moment #to even get back in current program i was working sixteen hours a day to pay old library fines and had to delicately back out of workplace #where manager was straight up violently physically abusive to her vulnerable employees and threatened retaliation #like an emotional torturer the likes of which i thought existed only in cartoons #and the week i filed for student aid a massive storm had knocked out electricity for days and i was clearing fallen tree debris #and then sitting in the dark in my room between job shifts no music no phone no food with my fingers crossed and i consider it a miracle #sorry dont mean to dramatize or draw attention to myself #so actually im happy you and i are alive

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tabooiart · 1 year ago

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nastyyy boy (affectionate)

#my art #fanart #starkid #team starkid #nerdy prudes must die #npmd #pokey #pokotho #corey dorris #i only have blinky left of these and then i can finally lay down and die #determined to get that done before i go back to college #this painting kicked my ass so hard btw #the ugly phase on this one was brutal. idk why.#and also i was kinda dreading his jacket but it was literally fine

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akagi0021 · 8 months ago

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thoughts on mafia au??

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figuringthengsout · 2 months ago

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Still thinking about this

Because in every other universe he decide to stop enduring, he took matters into his own hands and took his own life. The last thing he had.

But in this one, he held on for a bit more. Just a tiny bit more and found a lifeline in the evening breeze, in Renee, in long open roads and in his friends.

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grif-hawaiian-rolls · 1 month ago

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"Can't we push dying to a week from Friday?"

Another one down! this time, norn warrior Grif for my RvB gw2 au <3

man's got a stick to wack a bitch and he... might use it.

#rvb #red vs blue #rvb grif #rvb gw2 au #my art #batsy art #AT LASTTTTT #ive been sitting on this one almost since i finished kai's i just... could not finalize his fashion wars bc i didnt have any masc norns #to model the boots when i realized i wanted to do cultural boots for him so i made a keyfarm norn for once to finally sort him out #one more red left and then its just.. blues as far as the eye can see (jk theres only two 'blue's left bc im not counting wash)#but im getting there!! once i got the main blood gulch crew done i might slap them all into one image again.. for funsies #and bc the norn scaling only works if u have someone with them to make it clear how big they are lmao #but i digress!! bop stick grif <3

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skitskatdacat63 · 1 month ago

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All I want for Christmas isssssssssss to completely demolish your chances of winning another championship~

without text, and the lineart I really like:

plus some of my inspos:

and if only I wasn't a coward....

#i like to imagine this is some fia mandated community service for fernando and seb shows up to annoy the fuck out of him #seb: ive been a real naughty boy this year santa 😏 will you spank me instead of giving me coal?#fernando: 😐😐😐 this is supposed to be a children's event.#*proceeds to fall for seb's teasing regardless*#rip all the kids but santa is gonna be real busy for the next couple hours....#glad to continue my streak of only drawing modern fanart if its absurd in some way >:)#i am very proud of these hello :)#merry christmas!!! and a happy vettonso to you :D #please imagine these as waking up to santa having left gifts under the tree...fernanda claus....#i need to stop calling every work my best work though djfjkf its just regency bias #but idk what spurred me to draw all this in like. one day basically. considering i havent even drawn much since finals #im like haha wouldnt it be funny to draw topical fanart. fernando DID wear that santa suit one tim- oh my god #except it does mean i had to draw nando claus in a sexy pose which is um. interesting #but gaaaaahhhhh i really love these hahaha so hilarious to me. also wow as i said...relevant fanart for once so crazy #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #sv5 #fa14 #vettonso #sebnando #catie.art.#f1 #formula 1

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seasideoranges · 8 months ago

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y'all i gotta be honest for a sec, the "atla wouldnt change much if aang wasnt there, in fact it might be better" and "the atla finale wouldnt change much if aang wasnt there to fight ozai" debates is the funniest thing ive seen come out of this fandom

#'this show wouldnt change much if the main character wasnt there' hmm me thinks otherwise!#do people just. not realize that the gaangs arcs ESPECIALLY zukos and kataras would not have happened if aang was taken out of the picture?#ppl praise zukos redemption arc sm and rightfully so but aang is such a HUGE factor in zukos arc!#hell you could argue that it kickstarted because of aang #'if we knew each other back then do you think we could have been friends too?' the question that forever changed zukos life #without aang katara would still be stuck in the south pole with sokka and she wouldve never gotten the training she needed #toph wouldve never left if aang wasnt in the picture #hell you could argue the same with suki shed still be stuck on the island #tbh without aang theyd all be dead or at least in serious trouble by the end of the series #and the finale argument... cmon now #did people forget the scene of iroh explaining to zuko (AND THE AUDIENCE) that aang HAS to be the one to fight ozai #ONLY aang could defeat ozai #the strongest firebender in the series #without aang they all wouldve been cooked #by this point both zuko and sokka were seriously injured and katara and the rest were absolutely exhausted from fighting their own battles #ozai is only one guy yeah but again he is the strongest firebender in the whole series #even iroh was like 'nah theres no way in hell i could beat him'#ozai was in the air spinning around like a beyblade shooting fire from all parts of his body destroying everything in sight LMAOOO #delete later #probably

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averlym · 1 year ago

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litany of the martyrs (click for better resolution!)

#at some point i wanted to make an illustration for each character but in retrospect maybe each is multiple song-coded..#drew the sketch for a quincy thing after a chat with a mutual reminded me this song existed dfsghjkl and then spent weeks rendering this #quincy cynthius martin #adamandi #i'm finally done with this! the saints especially were joys to paint and the halo a menace.... this has been the most ambitious one so far.#but it also took quite long because i only worked on it <engages with quincy> when mentally okay to deal with the themes. i'm not religious #but i do identify with the irrational(?ish) guilt + family legacy + academic achievement + disregard for self. also more complex thoughts #about love [but depsite quincent being a large part of quincy's character this piece deals with mostly the Rest of it. so another time..]#anyways! in the original sketch- the saints had heads bent towards quincy so the halo spikes pointed at him. but this worked better! halos #of the saints implying/creating one for quincy was a concept from the start though. in the show they don't touch him directly here but #differences in mediums i think- i don't have time in an image to craft a narrative so everything has to be happening. also artistic liberty #misc inspiration for this includes stained glass windows. i might have maybe misinterpreted the saint costume but i think i logic-ed it out #as the cloth part following a nun's habit w the hood. and then halo above. the material is also more transparent originally but i had. um.#too much fun painting fabric folds.. if you look closely you can see the basis of faces though behind the cloth; but only the vague shapes #because smth obscurity + inhumanness// cassian is the only one i gave a mouth though. that stems from melliot's post about the saints and #st cassian as spokesperson (<- did research teehee!) that's also how i found out which costume = which saint. speaking of which.#left to right: 'st lucy take my hand' // 'st lawrence give me strength' (presses quincy forward; but hand on shoulder connotates guidance)#/'st cassian help me smile' (quincy's mouth is btwn a grimace and a smile; tilts up at side. also no direct touch bc added insidiousness.)#//'st jude [...] i hope your causes burn' (jude's hand is in two places to show movement- nearing the flame and then snatching back; burnt)#other notes: at the midst of the flame the core is shaped like a human heart /the saints and their wax are all melting like the candle for #fun visual effect and also this way they are even less tangible <real>. perks of painting as a medium i guess. // also insp from icarus?#wax and burning imagery; looking at the halo and rays as parallel to sun that burns. too close to the sun; melting; hurting; hurtling //#candles at bottom are a nod to the frankly gorgeous set// also the entire composition kind of stems from the lyric <what use is a candle if #both ends aren't burning>; the two sides between the concepts of catholic guilt and academic perfection that spur quincy #the halo above (saints and guilt; litanyofthemartyrs) and the 'halo' below (academic papers; insp from choreo for perfect at school)#the papers were originally supposed to be more glowy. but i like the idea of it now being a reflection of how quincy's priorities shift #also of note is that <candle> in centre = quincy; w burning candle + aforementioned heart in flame -> most human; idea of love + passion #last thoughts: kneeling + hands close tgt = prayer //wax dripping onto the red As make an effect that looks like blood. because i like #hiding that within the adamandi pieces :OO continuity!! // i've run out of tags but yeah! had fun with this one! every so often i go a #little insane in making art and the final result astounds even me. ngl i'm quite proud of this one. pretty colours <3333

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luck-of-the-drawings · 8 months ago

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POOR GABRIEL MONTEZ! YOU NEVER SAW THIS COMING DID YOU? ALL YOU WANTED WAS POWER. SECURITY. SAFETY. & THATS EXACTLY WHAT YOU GOT! JUST IN EXCHANGE FOR YOUR BODY. LETS JUST HOPE NO ONE FUCKS THIS UP. LETS JUST HOPE YOU WONT HAVE TO CLEAN UP THE MESS.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #cw gore #jrwi suckening spoilers #jrwi suckening #jrwi gabriel #jrwi gabriel montez #LOOK FAMILIAR?hahahahahDONT WORRY #IM REUPLOADING THIS HERE BC i fixed up the drawing a lil. and also i wanted to add main tags #U WONT SEE ANY DIFFERENCES BETWEEN THISSUN N THE POST ON MY SIDEBLOG.i changed the image there too.HA!!!!!!!#ANYWAY.i rambled plenty about pain and gabe on my sideblog.SO LETS TALK ABT THE ART SHALL WE.ihad i very hard time getting the colors down #would u believe i nearly left this uncolored??FUCKED UP!! it was only a sketchhow did it end up like this. it was only a sketch...#BUT IM RLY GLAD I WENT W COLORING IT.this time i actually used the airbrush n pencil tools BUT i also have a handy dandy brush i made #its just the mspaint air brush tool. fucking LOVE THAT THING. but now its in fire alpaca and it can be slightly transparent.IT LOOKS SOGOOD #perfect for splatters and grime.i love you mspaint i love youuu.im also so happy w the blood here.i think i reached a shift last year #back when i made that genloss fanart something abt the way i draw blood finally CLICKED and im like OH. the inside must always be darker.#like i KNEW that already but it was like my hand itself finally had it click.i wonder what i will learn next?I LIKE THE ORGANS HERE TOO #not as veiny or thready as i usually draw em. but i think thats fine. not as WET as id like em to be but thats also fine.#i got the point across. the point ofc being WOW THIS IS GRUESOME AND PAINFUL AND TERRIBLE #I LOVE HIS EXPRESSION.i love pain and thinking abt pain. you lose yourself to it after enough time passes of just being in an ocean o agony #at one point its just too tiresome to scream or writhe. theres a point when the body accepts it.sometimes.atleast.#OHHH GABRIEL AS A CHARACTER DELIGHTS ME SO MUCH.he is a dog to me.a thing to serve others.I WISH I KNEW MORE #WHAT ELSE DID YOU WANT BOY?? SURE POWER AND SECURITY AND SAFETY ARE NICE.BUT DID YOU HAVE DREAMS? WANTS? PASSIONS?#WHAT WAS THE STORY BEHIND THAT TIGER TATTOO ON YOUR ARM?WHAT DO THE DOGTAGS SAY BOY?I WISH I COULD HAVE TEA W U #OHHH TO SIT DOWN WITH A CHARACTER AND JUST SPEAK TO THEM. AND YET. AND YET IN THE END ITS ALL TRAGEDY AND COMEDY #TRAGEDY AND COMEDY THAT IS SO SO PAINFULLY UNBALANCED. SIGH.#WHATEVER CMERE BOY YOURE BECOMING AN OC OF MINE NOW UR GONNA BE IN SPACE AND UR NAME IS GONNA BE VINEGAR #UR STILL GONNA BE SHIP OF THESEUSED THOUGH. OOOHHH GABRIEEELLL GABRIEL MONTEEEZZZ #HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE BUILT INTO YOU.HOW MANY DID YOU LOVE AND CHERISH.HOW MANY TATTOOS DO U RECOGNIZE ON UR NEW ARMS #WHAT WAS IT LIKE? ON THE NIGHT U WERE SIRED?WERE YOU EXCITED? DID YOU SEE YOUR BOSS' FACE?WHAT WAS THIS PROMOTION LIKE?

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motsimages · 1 month ago

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As per Tumblr recommendation, I started Kevin can fuck himself yesterday. I see people comment on how the sitcom part makes it look the way people see an abuser and how the abuse can be disguised. People think he is just a funny guy and the abuse goes unnoticed. I personally see it otherwise, although it's similar.

People know he is an asshole. He spends a whole episode being mean to the new neighbours just because. He meets a dangerous guy at a bar, in public. He is an alcoholic who throws weird parties with lots of other people at home. Patty's boyfriend tells her twice in the 3 or 4 conversations we see that he is an idiot. People know, and people avoid him.

And his bubble know, but they justify it and excuse it. And that's the sitcom. The sitcom is the theater of excuses Allison has (and then other characters too) about his behaviour.

"Can you believe it? We were in our anniversary, such a fun party, we were both super drunk and I don't know how it ended, that I was face down on the floor and the table was broken! Anniversa-rager we call it lol"

"He is such a clumsy guy that just as I was leaving the house, you won't believe that I don't know how he managed to cover me in chilli sauce! What a silly goose!"

"He is so helpless without me, he couldn't find the printer and he called me all day because he needed me to explain to him how to work it. And he worries too! He called the cops because he didn't know where I was, maybe I forgot to tell him".

The conversations with her coworker about husbands help drive this point. That's what mariage is. You find ways to justify it and to avoid certain fights and that's it. We got lucky.

But he did all these things on purpose. And the unreliable narrator of the sitcom makes the joke of it and makes the audience consider that maybe it isn't *that bad*. Allison needs to believe that's what it is, so it is. It really isn't that bad, she thinks, he is just like that.

And we can actually see the worrying things and the threatening parts from minute one. It's only a joke because we have been trained to dismiss it. To justify it and to move on. He isn't doing any heavy lifting here.

In episode 1, just the fact that he ends up standing on the table (when she doesn't want him to even put glasses on without protection) says a lot. But then the table breaks and he fixes it poorly and visibly. It would be bad enough just like this, but I personally think there is more to it. It's just that Allison doesn't want to speak about it or look at it so it is just the table, but it's the switch that turns on for her, the last drop. But she did end face down on her living room, on top of the broken table. It's a very elegant narrative tool where we don't see, but if we wanted to see, it's there.

And the more she notices, the more off-putting the sitcom is. It's still played as a joke, with the laugh track, but she is more aware now, so we can notice too.

We start the series with her turning point, but if the series started a year before that, it would only be happening in her house, as it is her life, her only frame of reference, and it would only be a sitcom because isn't he such a clumsy but caring guy?

#kevin can fuck himself #I have so many thoughts about this series #I have 2 examples of the top of my head of social situations that reflect on this sitcom idea #1 of them when she finally divorced him everyone in the village congratulated her #nobody liked him. he created trouble wherever he went. he had felony charges all over the place.#there was not much anybody could do. His sisters (not hers. HIS) came years before to tell her to divorce him and still #people knew. he didn't charm anybody. he didn't pretend he was the perfect husband #and another one was much less violent but things had to be as he liked them when he liked them where he liked them #I was in that group of friends for 3 months and left because it was boring but also because there was nothing for me to do #he didn't have a job yet his wife had to cook after work for all his friends in the day we all met #a long time friend of his barely came to his dinners and said that he only hang out with him at bars where he could get drunk #because he couldn't stand him while not drunk #so his wife would be isolated from many people because many of the people who used to hang out with him just didn't want to be there #I don't know if she had her own friends #this is just to say: people know and the victim is still isolated because eventually there is nothing people can do #there is no hollywood solution to it #and: the victim is isolated even when there is people to chat with them and help them out #the victim isolates themself. The abuser isolates them on purpose. and the whole situation is very difficult to handle from the outside.

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