#I MESSED UP THE GREEN ONE SO THAT ONE IS GRASS THEMED

[dcxdpdabbles]

Does Menace Danny have a favorite pastime?

Clark is reassigned against his will to cover another story about the Waynes. This time, Perry had to fight tooth and nail to get a exclusive interview with the eldest Wayne child, and if Clark messed it up, he could kiss any dreams of writing on the front page goodbye.

Despite the difficulty in securing it, it was a simple piece. If anything, it was less journalism and more tabloid gossip since the topic of the article was going to be Fenton-Wayne's hobbies and the Meet the Star theme.

Perry wanted Clark to dig further and find out if the young man was willing to give any details away about his new Heir Apparent status or his love life. He didn't fulfill out state it, but Clark could read between the lines.

He wouldn't pry because Clark hated gossip on a good day, and trying to trick a child into giving him gossip to make money off made him down right evil.

Perry was just going to have to be disappointed that Clark was too boring to get his meaning. It helped that Bruce Wayne was unwilling to let any other reporter cover the stroy, so Perry couldn't send one of his less straight lace reporters.

"You're back." The voice is low, nearly a whisper but with a steel that has every hair on Clark's body raise. Its not the sound of someone cowering, but rather someone about to pounce a victim.

He whips around to find Daniel Fenton-Wayne standing in the ajar door, staring at him with a tense bleak set of blue eyes. They don't quite glow, but they stand out in the darkness surrounding the boy and give the impression of spotting a predator waiting to attack in the long grass.

Clark has always been told his eyes were unnaturally blue, thats why he hid them behind such tick glasses design to make him appear as bug eyed as possible.

If people noticed the strangeness of his irises, they would just dismiss it to his glasses, magnifying his eyes.

He almost wants to share the tip with Fenton-Wayne but holds back. "Yes. I'm going to be doing your interview today. It's good to see you again."

"Bruce won't be joining us." The boy states, not moving closer. Half his face is hidden by the shadows, and were Clark a regular human, he wouldn't have been able to make out his moving lips. "It's will be just us."

"If you prefer to have your guardian or another trusted adult present for the interview, I don't mind coming back at a later date." Clark offers instantly watching the boy's face twitch. He attemps a disarming smile, but it only causes Fenton-Wayne's expression to flatter into an impassive one that rings warning bells in Clark's head.

"No. I can handle being alone. Can you?" The boy tilts his head slightly "Follow me."

Clark scrambles after the child, grabbing his bag. He has to pretend to stumble into a low table since the boy hadn't bothered to turn on the lights of the windowless hallway. They go further into Wayne Manor at a brisk fast pace without a word, though. Clark notices Fenton-Wayne glancing at him every once in awhile over his shoulder.

"Bruce said you were going to write about teenager hobbies and wanted to ask me questions about mine," the boy says in that same near whisper speech.

The pair stop before a large door without warning. It stands out for the green fairy lights hung on the doorframes, painting the hallway in an errie glow.

Clark's mind jumps to horror moives, especially with the light disoriented instrumental music playing that he can hear through the thick double doors. Against sense, he grows a little uneasy as Fenton-Wayne's large blue eyes train on his face, looking horrifyingly more blue in the green light the boy is bathed in.

"Um yes thats right." Clark coughs, shifting his feet. "I- what do you do for fun?"

"I make dolls of my classmates." Fenton-Wayne rasps,"and then I set them on fire."

Oh.

" I made one of you." The boy continues hand on the door handle. He starts to turn it slowly, but not once does he remove his gaze from Clark's, pinning him in place with his intense stare. "It can cry."

Oh.

Clark throws a wild look at the door, almost unsure if he wants the boy to open it. "W-why would you make a doll of me?"

Fenton Wayne's smile is more of a baring of teeth as he finally pushes the heavy door open. The wood groans heavily as it swings open, echoing around the sound of Clark's heartbeat in his ears. When it swings open, it reveals an equally dark room, but this one has a projector throwing a spectacular display of the Milky Way swirling on the ceiling.

Drapes were strung all over the room, and small twinkling purple lights were woven behind the clothes of a few, creating a path to a lone circular table in the center.

Unlike the door's green glow, these lights bathe the room in various blues and purples, drawing Clark's eyes to the dolls on the wall-to-wall shelves. They seemed made of yarn, with detailed clothes and sweet little smiles. Clark would almost call them cute if it weren't for the fact that he could see a replica of himself sitting on the shelves and a very telling voice box sewn into it once he activates his e-ray vision.

"Amigurumi," Fenton-Wayne remarks, making his way to the Clark doll. He gently lifts it up from the shelf, stopping to adjust a display next to it.

Clark is horrified to realize that the display is a replica of a class photo, complete with little bleachers and a sign declaring the year and school name. The twenty dolls are organized in the same positions as the life models shown in the frame photo next to them.

"What?"

"It's the type of doll I make—amigurumi. My hobby is crocheting amigurumi figures, and this little guy is you," Fenton-Wayne said, pressing the little button on the box. In an instant, the room fills with weeping interrupted by broken breathing, as if the doll were choking on its tears.

"That's the sound you'll make when I set you on fire for sleeping with my Dad." Fenton-Wayne places the doll on the center table, admiring it like a proud father. He then reaches under the table and pulls out a deck of cards, shuffling them without a care that the Clark-Doll has fallen silent. "I also dabble in cartomancy, with the help of ghost cards. Would you like to learn how you die? I'm hoping it has something to do with flames."

Clark gets his article, but when Perry complains about not having any gossip-worthy material, he slams the sobbing doll on his desk and then leans in to demand time off. His boss grants it the moment Clark starts retelling his fortune-telling session.

Perry also grew uneasy when Clark pressed the play option on his tape recorder, and Fenton-Wayne's raspy whisper blares in the otherwise silent office. "Clockwork's tower upside down, Pandora's box ripped open, and the three of Pariah Dark's artifacts. Do you see the Sarcophagus of Forever Sleep? It means you will likely succumb to fatal wounds. Pity, it doesn't look like fire will be the cause. Now I'll never know if the crying audio was close to the real thing."

As Clark heads home to enjoy his paid time off, he wonders again how someone as dizzy and well-meaning as Mr. Wyane could wind up with a creepy little kid like Fenton-Wayne.

[cupcakewebkinz]

So I mentioned I quickly wrote a Shellevision story last night... And I'm just gonna fuck everything and post it here. Yay!

No trigger warnings unless you're scared of gays, in that case you should get off my blog as I'm gay LOL

I hope y'all like it even if it is sloppy and probably has grammar problems and ooc moments aidbidhsdbjdg (under le cut for sanity sake)

Vee giggled as she watched Dandy’s little rock dog run off after the ball she had just thrown, having a great time winding down with Pebble after a long day of work. She was just relaxing with a fuzzy dark green blanket wrapped around her, despite never getting cold, her handler was very insistent on her keeping warm when she was outside in the colder months like this. Thus, she always had a blanket when she was out, even if it was quite warm for an autumn night. Vee looked up at the sky, smiling a little at the stars twinkling above. She looked back down as Pebble came rushing back over with the ball in his mouth, his tiny body popping up over the slightly overgrown grass every time he bounced forward towards her. It was oddly adorable, even if Vee would never admit she thought such a thing. She just held her hand out, and once he had approached, the ball dropped right into her hand.

"Good boy Pebble, good boy. Now go fetch!" Vee praised before she threw the ball, watching as the rock dog ran off after it, sighing when he faded off into the distance. She then looked back up at the stars, tilting her head a little. People say you could make wishes on them, right? She squinted at that idea, as there probably was no way that was even slightly true, even if it did seem like a fun idea. Her wish would never come true, regardless of how many stars she'd wish upon. She lowered her screen and looked beside her, smiling a little at the empty spot. Usually Dandy or Astro was there to help her watch Pebble to make sure he didn't run out of Gardenview's park, but it was just her today. She honestly couldn't have been more grateful, she would've been a wreck if one of them knew she was thinking about her again. Vee held out her hand again as she heard Pebble approach, and once the ball was once again in her hand, she just tossed it for him yet again. Pebble barked before he ran off, as he tended to do, while Vee was still kind of lost in thought, looking back up at the stars. Maybe she could wish for her to be there... No, she can't be dumb, there's no way she'd be able to come out and look at the stars tonight. She shook her head to clear her thoughts, putting a hand on her screen to help bring her back to reality. There's no way- she stopped her thought when she heard someone walking over. She had to focus on life again... They can't see her being such a mess. Though before she could say anything, the other just sat down beside her, and she couldn't honestly believe her eyes when she saw it was exactly who she was thinking about.

"Hey Vee, I thought you'd be out here. It's a nice night, isn't it?" Shelly asked quietly as she settled in her spot, adjusting her multicolored dinosaur themed blanket around herself before she looked at the absolutely bamboozled robot beside her.

"Oh uh, yeah, Pebble wanted to play fetch again so, I came out here, I wasn't expecting you to join. It's nice to see you though." Vee replied, smiling as she held out her hand for the pup, and only turned to look at him as she threw the ball again. She watched as he chased after it, then she turned back to the fossil now sitting beside her, who was silently staring up at the stars with a look of peaceful bliss on her face. Vee couldn't help but to smile at that, admiring her peaceful state and the small things that just made Shelly so precious. Like her little freckles, the little dirt stains that would never leave her shell no matter how much they scrubbed at them, the tiny cracks from the many tumbles she faced as a young toon. Vee moved a little closer, though she had to stop herself from getting too close, as she knew her screen must be buzzing from all the emotions she felt right now and didn't want to be caught staring at her best friend like this. Though she desperately wanted to get closer, to hold her, to touch her even the slightest bit, she wouldn't let herself. She wouldn't let herself just confess that she loved Shelly more than just a best friend... She couldn't, she couldn't risk losing their friendship. She started to back away a little, but Shelly gently stopped her with a hand on the side of her screen. Vee gently nuzzled her screen into her clawed hand, unable to stop herself anymore... She must tell her she loves her, even if it might cost everything. She must know.

"Shelly..." Vee mumbled, though she was gently stopped before she could even say what was on her mind.

"I love you too, Vee. I love you too." Shelly quietly said as she put her forehead against the top of Vee's monitor, her other claw soon gently holding the other side of Vee's screen. Vee was a blushing disaster, wondering how she knew that's what she was going to say, having absolutely no idea how much of a lesbian disaster she had been lately. Shelly wasn't going to call her out on it though, and was instead moving in for a kiss, however they were interrupted.

"Arf arf!"

The two immediately turned and looked at Pebble, having completely forgotten he was even there, their faces both bright with blush. Pebble, seeming to understand he was interrupting something, just picked up his ball and ran off to go inside. Vee just looked back at Shelly afterwards, gently putting a hand on her arm and nuzzling her screen back into her claws.

"I love you so much Shelly..." Vee quietly stated, smiling as she felt the fossil gently put her forehead against hers again. This felt so right, all of this, this all just felt... Great. Vee couldn't help but snuggle herself closer to Shelly as the other gently scratched the sides of her head, feeling so at ease with her so close. She could tell Shelly felt the same way, as she heard the other let out a relaxed sigh as they stayed so close. Neither had wanted to move, however, they knew they had to soon, they both realized that this probably doesn't look like just two friends bonding under the stars. They looked at each other before one dared to move... They knew they weren't just friends, they knew they'd have to admit that one day, they both could tell by the look in their eyes. Vee however was the first to move, as she carefully and slowly sat back up and moved Shelly's hands away from her face, though she couldn't hide how disappointed she was even if she cared to try. Shelly couldn't either, she could tell she was trying, but it definitely wasn't working out for her. Vee looked around, then looked back at the fossil, quickly attempting to think of a way they could enjoy the other's company like that again, then she had an idea. She quickly got up and turned around, unwrapping the blanket from herself before laying it down on the grass, then she simply... Pointed to it. Shelly looked very confused, as she had absolutely no idea what was going on, but slowly got up and sat down on the blanket anyways. Vee sat beside her gently, then looked over at her, watching her very confused expression for a minute as she tried to process everything. She confessed to Shelly, Shelly said she loved her back, and now Shelly probably thinks she's lost her marbles as they sit on her blanket together. How would she fix this..? She thought a little more, but before she said anything, Shelly looked back up at the stars again, then at Vee, then at the stars.

"Oh my goodness, you wanted to cuddle and stargaze like we did as little toons, didn't you? I'm sorry, I just, I didn't expect any of this and I'm-"

"It's okay, let's just cuddle and let ourselves understand what happened." Vee stated quietly, and Shelly just nodded in agreement, laying her blanket beside her before she laid down, having her left arm tucked under her head and her right arm out for snuggles. Vee immediately joined her, curling up against her right side and putting her head on her shoulder, ignoring the red fluff from Shelly's onesie that covered up part of her screen. Vee just wanted to cling to Shelly for a while and not think about anything, so she gently hugged her and clung to her onesie, which Shelly obviously didn't seem to mind as she just wrapped her free arm around her. The two then laid in silence, watching the stars together as they held each other close, seeming at peace with each other. Vee had missed this... It's been so long since they both were able to just cuddle and not think about what anyone had to say about them, and she knew Shelly probably did too. Vee barely understood how nobody really liked her, Shelly was such a kind and caring toon, always looking out for her friends and cheering them on. Yeah she smelled like dirt most of the time, but... It's grown to be a comforting scent to her. She's such a kind toon with such a sweet voice and caring soul... How could anyone not see that? Vee frowned a little at that thought, she probably shouldn't think too hard about that right now. She looked over at Shelly, who looked lost in her own thoughts as well, then decided to do something a little random to see if it'll help them both relax more.

"Hey Shelly, what constellations do you think the dinosaurs saw?" Vee quietly asked, getting a surprised look from Shelly in response, then a shrug.

"Honestly, they probably wouldn't have seen what we see, since the stars move and die, but they probably saw some pretty cool ones. If they even looked at stars... Oh, maybe we can find some star clusters that make dinosaur shapes!" Shelly replied with a sudden burst of excitement at her own idea, and Vee just nodded, watching as Shelly moved her arm out from under her head and soon was pointing out constellations that just barely looked like simplified dinosaurs. Vee didn't ever correct her though, she just listened to her ramble as she relaxed, feeling safe and secure as they both looked at the stars. She knew that no matter what now, they knew they weren't just friends anymore, and she was honestly more than okay with that. No matter what would happen to either of them... They'd always have the other right there to cheer them on. No matter what happens to Gardenview, they'll stay together. Vee looked up at Shelly again, then she looked back at the stars as she relaxed her body a little more, gently clinging to Shelly just a little tighter. Maybe wishes do come true after all... Vee squinted at the thought, no, she still wouldn't believe that. That's just childish thinking, even if her own dreams did come true that night.

[deliriousgrl-writes]

content warning// this chapter contains explicit sexual themes

three 𐙚⋆°.

"what do you think you're doing, jacobs?" called his coach on the field, he blew his whistle as nate stood above the scrawny teammate he had just tackled. nate stood there, sighing to himself before throwing his helmet to the bright green grass beneath him, his hair a sweaty mess. he thought the kids name was craig, or michael maybe?

"where's your head?" his coach asked as he made his way over, exchanging a hand down to the wounded teammate on the ground. the guy got up with a groan, throwing his own helmet off in frustration.

nate let out a breath, his hands on his hips as he watched his couch walk away with the down teammate, eyes of the other teammates on the field watching the scene unfold.

practice was almost over and nate was distracted, something he hated to be in front of his teammates and coach. his mind was elsewhere, thinking of the many texts maddy had sent him before practice.

maddy: where tf are u?

maddy: ur being weird lately and i don't know how to talk 2 u

maddy: is this abt yesterday?

maddy: call me

maddy: forget it. k.

nate had tried to his best to shake the thoughts of stress away but he was struggling. he hadn't meant to tackle his teammate so roughly, the kind of hit that would leave a person in the hospital. luckily, the kid seemed fine. his coach on the other hand, was not happy. nate spit on the ground and saw a couple of his teammates walk over. he reluctantly met their gazes, not wanting this kind of interaction right now.

"you trying to kill people out here or what?" asked carter. nate didn't like carter much, hated his constant joking and incessant need to run around the locker rooms naked without a care. carter was stocky and strong, with red hair and freckles that scattered his nose and cheeks.

"shut it," nate replied, grabbing his helmet from the ground, "maybe that kid should learn how to block."

another boy beside carter, jace, spoke up, his dark skin and features eyeing nate up carefully. jace had his reservations about nate, never joking with him and sensing nate's ability to fly off the handle. "what's up man?" jace asked, a hint of sincerity in his tone. nate chuckled dryly, not wanting to look weak in front of his fellow teammates.

"i'm fine," nate said, starting to walk over to the refreshments table. carter and jace followed behind, leaving nate annoyed but he knew he had to keep up appearances.

"maddy seemed pissed yesterday," carter said with a laugh, grabbing a bottle of gatorade from the wide table, "i think she wants to chop your balls off or something."

nate rolled his eyes once more, taking a sip of water from the small red cup in his hands, "she's nothing i can't handle." carter nodded, sensing nate's dismissal of the subject of maddy.

nate's coach walked over to the boys, the whistle hanging from his chest swaying as he walked. "keep pulling this shit, jacobs, and i'll bench your ass for rest of the season," he said, pointing his finger in nate's face.

if there was one thing nate hated it was someone who acted like they knew better than him. sure, nate had tackled the kid a bit roughly but he was fine. nate was a good player, the best linebacker east high had ever saw, a small scrimmage incident during practice wouldn't change that. he looked to the ground for a moment, choosing his words carefully, "got it, coach. it won't happen again."

at the end of practice, nate was in the locker room changing in a stall, something he always did that stood out amongst the other guys. he heard carter and jace's voices echoing in the room, lockers shutting between words.

"he better get his head on straight if he wants to keep acting like he's the best on the team," he heard carter say. nate listened for a moment, pulling his shirt over his head as he heard jace's response.

"he's been weird lately," jace said, his voice booming and loud against the concrete walls of the locker room, "he didn't even go to mckays last saturday. maddy must have him on a short leash these days."

"she's a bitch," carter replied, "what do you expect?"

nate decided to exit the stall in that moment, carter and jace's eyes meeting his in surprise. "you think i'm stupid? that i don't have my shit together?" nate asked darkly, his eyes narrowing on the two boys. a menacing smirk was on his face, his tall height causing him to tower over the two boys.

carter let out a nervous laugh, shaking his head. "no man, we know you got it," carter said, his shirt still in his hands. jace nodded, wary of nate's next actions.

nate was loved and feared on the team. he always showed up for games, winning them more times than the team could count, but he had a reputation. nate could be a team player or a nightmare depending on what side you were on, he planned to keep it that way. instead of intimidating the boys further, nate had other plans. he slipped out of the locker room and into the almost empty parking lot by the field, his hand holding his still vibrating phone, knowing it was maddy texting him.

he put the key in the ignition and let his engine roar to life, his body slumping in his seat a bit as he checked his phone.

maddy: i'm not going to wait forever.

maddy: ur being ridiculous

maddy: fuck u, i'm done

maddy: why can't u just call me????

nate sighed to himself, the bright lights that illuminated the field shutting off and encompassing him in darkness. he decided to just turn his phone off before he pulled out of the school parking lot, heading onto the road, the headlights of his tall truck illuminating the road ahead brightly. he drove for awhile, trying his best to clear his head. thoughts of the day before entered his mind, the way his shy prize had spoke to him softly about the book from class, how her tiny hands had fiddled with the heart shaped locket that was usually nestled to her chest. he zoned out as he drove, picturing the differences between her and maddy.

the shy girl was so much more to him, the potential he saw in her far greater than maddys. he had loved maddy once, more than anyone he had loved before, but things changed. they fought more, she was more possessive than ever. sure they had broken up ten million times at this point, even fucking different people to make the other jealous, but now, nate wanted something different. he wanted something easy, something more perfect than he could ever imagined. the shy girl seemed more worthy of his attention than maddy now.

as he drove through the quiet neighborhood, his eyes scanned the houses once more, making sure to note any small changes. they were still the same, the same abandoned ones as well as the small family homes scattered about. he reach the white house, the chipped blue shudders and rose bush still by the entrance. the red car was parked in front, all the lights in the modest house appeared to be off except one, the upstairs. his eyes darted around for a moment, the darkness around him making him narrow his brown eyes up at the dim light coming from the upstairs window. nate reach over into the passenger seat beside him, his fingers wrapping around the handle of his handgun tightly. he couldn't help himself, his mind had wondered earlier that day, imagining how unsafe she may be if he wasn't around to protect her. he had watched her in english class earlier, her eyes never meeting his as the class studied and reviewed the giver. she paid attention, writing notes in her pink butterfly notebook and doodling drawings of clouds and moons on the pages.

nate had thought about all the horrible possibilities of his shy girl being hurt. how an older man would take a liking to her soft beauty, watching her until it was time for him to grab her and push her into his car, tying her up in his basement to have his way with her. or some college guy taking advantage of her, the power imbalance forcing her to look up to him, give herself to him and get hurt in the end. nate couldn't stand the thought; another man snatching her up and not being worthy of the pure and innocent ways in which she operated. she wasn't like the other girls at school, never wanting attention and preferring to stay in the background. nate didn't even know why maddy had became friends with her in the first place, maybe seeing her as a project. he didn't want the shy girl to change at all, maybe just her assumption of him. maybe just her feelings once she realized how much she needed someone like nate to take care of her, protect her.

he watched for an hour or two, his eyes focused on the upstairs light, the only one on in the small home. when he watched her silhouette arrive behind the dimly lit curtain to turn the light out, he held his breath, his handgun still clutched in his hand. how could he possibly leave now? she would be asleep, curled up in her bed, not knowing how much of a target she could be. she was more vulnerable asleep, never knowing who could just break in, someone breaking the screen door on her porch and breaking in through the front door. how'd she be so unaware if someone were to make their way up the steps to her, pulling the covers off her and covering her mouth as she was assaulted. he swallowed at the thought, clenching his jaw as he made sure to study the street around him once more, silently wandering to himself if he was the only one watching. hoping he was.

nate left four hours later, knowing he had to be able to get up for school the next day. after all he had to appear normal, had to keep his head on straight to not fuck things up. he was reluctant to leave the dark quiet neighborhood, his eyes glancing up at the upstairs window once more before he drove away.

he texted maddy back once he made it inside his large home, the extravagant decor a complete contrast to the people who inhabited the space. nate's eyes scanned the family portraits on the walls as he made his way up the stairs, internally cringing at how fake it all was. his father, cal, was very influential in the community. he had built many businesses and housing units in town, earning quite the living in the perfect suburbia he called home. though he held a dark secret, which nate knew about. that was his power over his dad. nate knew. he couldn't unsee it once he had, just a boy watching his father do despicable things to strangers on color coded tapes. nate wondered if maybe that was the moment something switched in him, but deep down he knew he was destined to be who he was from the start, sharing his fathers dna and all. as if on cue his father walked up the staircase, a glass of bourbon in his hand as he greeted his son.

"nathaniel," cal called, walking up to stand beside the tall boy, his arm reaching up to pat his tense shoulder, "where you been?"

nate wanted to scream at him, tell him he didn't need an explanation and to just keep his mouth shut, but he didn't. instead he replied back to his father in a hushed tone, his words icy. "doesn't matter. i'm going to bed."

cal let out a deep laugh, the sound making nate's fists clench at his sides. "that maddy.. she's a handful, i can see it. a distraction that you can not afford, son. straighten up. i heard about practice earlier tonight. how do you expect to make it on a team if you're trying to kill people?"

nate found it almost humorous how his father could talk about what he had done but never admit to what he was still doing. instead of protesting, nate just wanted to the conversation to be over. he looked at the older man at his side, his fathers aged face looking back at him with cold eyes. his father always seemed to be taunting him, searching for a reaction in nate that he wasn't willing to give. "i already told coach it won't happen again."

cal patted his sons shoulder again, his glass still in the other hand. "good. stay focused, nathaniel. if you do you'll do great things, i can see it. i've know it since you were born. you're a fighter, and some people, others, they don't like that. they'll try to distract you, want you to fail. but you're my son, you're much more than them."

his words seemed more melancholy than supportive, maybe even distant. nate just nodded before walking over to his bedroom door, leaving his father out in the hall and shutting the door behind him softly. nate despised his father.

nate: we need to talk. i'll drive u home after school.

maddy: ok?

nate shed his clothes and dropped his duffel bag to the floor of his room, his body tense and his mind still far away. his father was right about one thing; maddy was a distraction, a distraction from what he really wanted. who he really wanted.

he pictured the girl in his mind as he tried to sleep. he imagined her in bed with him, wearing nothing but a white lacy teddy, her soft skin pressed against his own, her wide eyes looking up at him with need. he let his mind wonder, the way her gold heart shaped locket would look, the rest of her bare as she'd pant beneath him, his hands running up her thighs, his fingers gripping the skin. he stroked himself beneath his duvet, his hand gripping himself as he let the images unfold in his mind. he could see it all so clearly, her on her knees before him, his fingers gripping her chin as her doe eyes stared up into his. he panted to himself at the image, how beautiful the sounds she would make would be. her soft voice whining as he took her nice and slow, dipping his cock deep inside her tight virgin walls, how her tiny fingers would grip his shoulders. how out of breath she would be from how full she would feel from him. he felt himself come undone, the hot liquid shooting up onto his stomach and between his fingers as he stroked himself to near overstimulation. he liked how it was almost painful, the sensation and thoughts in his head fueling his indescribable lust. his jaw clenched as he pulled himself up from his bed and into his bathroom, washing himself off and scrubbing himself clean. his thick cock was still hard and throbbing beneath his tight boxers as he looked himself in the eyes in the mirror. he let himself revel in the almost animalistic way his chest rose and fell rapidly, his eyes dilated until they were nearly black, the brown of his eyes gone. he had to have her, it wasn't a question or fantasy, he had to have her.

———

nate woke up only a few hours later so that he could work out before school. nate was strict about his daily regimen, work out until failure, take a shower, brush his teeth, fix his hair, the whole works. he liked being organized, making sure people saw him as someone put together.

he pushed himself hard that morning, laying on his bench press and groaning as he lifted the heavy weight. he liked pushing himself, stopping once all the muscles in his body were throbbing. being seen as strong was important to him, keeping his body in perfect shape and eating the right diet, it was easy for him to maintain routines, though he had been distracted lately. so, he pushed himself past his limits, his hands sore and rough once he was done.

after he popped into a cold shower, scrubbing himself with some expensive men's body wash and some conditioning shampoo, he did the rest of his routine and headed to school. he skipped breakfast, not wanting to be around his father that morning, not wanting to hear the sound of his voice.

once nate parked his truck into a free parking space by the school, his eyes scanned the cars dropping students off and spotting her. it was the same red car he knew of, her small body jumping out of the passenger seat and waving goodbye. she was wearing something nate had never seen before, a black tennis skirt that came down to the middle of her thighs and a matching tucked in black sweater. nate couldn't lie, the sight of her in such dark colors made desire stir in his jeans. and once she walked away from the car he could see cream ruffled socks above her white tennis shoes, making his head spin. he did much prefer her in bright, softer colors, but she was still perfect in his eyes. her hands held the straps of her back pack, her small form walking into the schools entrance, it was then that nate finally decided to step out of his truck.

his eyes scanned the hallways, his own backpack perched on his shoulder as his tall body walked past the other students. he stopped himself from stopping by her locker, wishing more than anything that he could see her, speak to her. but he was surprised when he saw her there already, maddy and kat by her side, talking. he backed away, going to his own locker and peaking out of the corner of his eye at the three girls as he pretended to rearrange the textbooks in his locker. maddy was wearing another revealing outfit as always, with bright pink leggings and a matching cropped tank top that showed off a bit too much to be considered school appropriate. he silently wondered if maddy and kat were to blame for the shy girls sudden change in appearance, now being able to make out a hint of makeup on her soft features, a sharp black eyeliner framing her doe eyes. his chest thumped with annoyance, not wanting her to try and fit in with the likes of maddy and kat. she was too special for that and much too innocent.

the rest of the school day was boring, nate kept his appearances though by chatting with his friends, the typical asshole football players from his team. he kept up his cruel and sarcastic attitude with them, not letting them think something was up with him. he had to make himself the leader still, had to make sure they knew who was in charge despite his recent m.i.a behavior. he laughed along with their jokes and stupid antics, pretending to be who he always was. once classes ended for the day he knew it was time, maddy hadn’t spoke to him all day or sought him out, but he knew he was expected to drive her home and would need to execute his plan.

he was standing by his truck in the crowded parking lot, his eyes on the ground as he leaned against the silver metal. “hey,” he heard her say, her tone a bit aggressive. he knew she had every right to be mad at him, he had been avoiding her after all. but it annoyed him nonetheless.

he looked down at her as she stood in front of him, her hands by her side and her expression perplexed. he wondered if she saw what was coming. “hey,” he replied, keeping his voice especially soft for maddy, “let’s go for a drive.”

she nodded and walked over to the passenger seat, nate following behind her and helping her up the steep step up. once he had jumped into the drivers side, he put the key in the ignition and they were off. maddy was quiet for a moment and nate could feel her eyes on him as he focused on the road. the sun was already setting, the clouds and sky a bright orange as he drove down the busy streets.

“i thought you were just going to drive me home,” maddy said, her big brown eyes narrowing on him.

“i thought we could go somewhere and talk,” nate replied carefully, one hand on the steering wheel and then other rested against the window, his knuckles resting against his cheek as he tried to keep himself in check. he had already thought this through, how to play this situation. nate needed to find somewhere private to talk knowing that maddy would make a scene in public, so he drove to a nearby park right by the lake. maddy was silent in her seat and he could see her gears turning in her pretty head, already suspicious of the situation.

they arrived, his truck parked and the two of them jumping out and walking over to stand by the lake. “you really upset me,” maddy said, her voice sincere as they walked by the body of water, the orange from the sky reflecting on the surface, “i mean… you’re supposed to want to talk to me. you know you can talk to me.”

a normal person would feel a bit of guilt at her words, maybe even debating on wether breaking up with her was the right idea if she loved them so much. but nate wasn’t normal and he had his sights set on someone else. maddy would have to live with it, and the hundreds of other things he’d put her through.

“maddy,” nate said, making sure his voice came out a bit erratic. he turned to face her, stopping her in her tracks and leaving a small gap between them. “i just.. i have to tell you something.”

“what is it?” she asked, her eyes concerned. she blinked up at him, her hand reaching out to touch his shoulder. nate backed away before she could, putting on a show and running his hand through his hair to appear to be distressed.

“maddy.. i-i’m struggling. i’m having a hard time. which isn’t your fault.. it’s not your fault i’m so fucked up,” he bit his lower lip, his jaw tensing. she looked up at him with worry and surprise at his words, her hands reaching out again.

“what-what do you mean? what’s going on, nate? you can trust me,” she soothed, her hand landing on his arm. her small fingers rested there and nate could feel the slight tremble they held.

“no,” he uttered taking a step back from her. this time he put his hands on her shoulders, his grip on her tight, displaying a sense of urgency in his eyes, “you don’t get it. you don’t. i’m sorry you’ve gotten mixed up with someone like me, i’m not some normal fucking guy, maddy. i don’t deserve you… i never have.”

she looked confused, her thin brows pressing together as she took in his words and was held in his grip. he removed his hands from her shoulders, his fingers moving up to his face to press against the space between his eyebrows. this had to work, he had to make this all believable for her, she had to understand.

when she tried to speak, nate interrupted her harshly, his words stern. “i need you to walk away from this. from me. you need to keep yourself away from someone as fucked up as me. you need to save yourself from me before i hurt you. because i will. i have already.”

she crossed her arms, licking her lips before she spoke, “what do you mean? i mean… i love you, nate. please tell me what’s going on, i-i can help.”

nate turned around and began walking away from her, the orange that the sky held finally gone dark as clouds covered the setting sun. you could already see the moon casting a small light on the water and against their bodies. maddy hurriedly caught up to him, her voice filled up empathy. “nate please! i want to understand. i’m perfectly capable of fucking understanding! i care about you, whatever you’re going through, i care!”

nate kept his shoulders tense as he walked, breathing out a bit to stifle a sigh. he was trying to make this easy for her, as easy as he could but she loved him too much.

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

this is a long one, i hope the filler stuff wasn’t too hard to read! and yes, this interaction with maddy will be continued into the next part and FINALLY some stuff will start happening between nate and reader<3 i hate for it to be slow pace but i enjoy a slow burn, i think it pays off way more hehe sorry abt it xx i’m planning a felix catton from saltburn fic atm as well if u like him at all hehe i can’t help it, jacob elordi is my muse at this point.

read part one and two here xx

[stranger-things-yapper]

Stranger Things Color Association

Ok so we all know how the theme colors of Byler are blue and yellow because of blue meets yellow in the west and several other things. But now I've gone back to drawing and I want to draw ST fanart and I want other colors for the other characters. But everyone in this show dresses in shared colors so now I'm STUMPED

Somebody HELP

Cuz like, to me, blue is like a smart color, right? But I think a darker blue has been associated with Mike a lot, so I'd leave him with that. I kinda want Dustin to also be associated with blue, but a sky blue. He is smart, but he brings levity with his sarcasm and occasional silliness. He also has a lot of graphic tees and dresses in either bright colors or cream-colored clothing, so he's doesn't really have a theme based on a single color/vibe.

And I kinda want yellow to represent the Byers siblings in general, mostly because I like the parallels between Jancy and Byler. I just think it'd be neat. Then Jonathan would be yellow and Nancy would be blue, too, but like a baby blue.

Both Lucas and Max in my mind are associated with red and white and army green. Lucas with his affinity for the "macho man" of the 80's, for the movies with martial arts or lots of guns or military jargon. Max with her "totally tubular" interests, like skateboarding and videogames and comic books. And I think the army green binds them, in a way. It's like forest, grass, foliage. It's grounding and safe, and also looks great with Max's red hair.

El is a bit trickier to fit in this category, because I don't associate her with colors, I associate her with patterns. She uses plaid when she is isolated/sad, she uses prints when she's free/feels powerful, and we only see her in solid colors when she's in a bad situation (Max in a coma, talking to Mike in the pizzeria, running from home in S2, the hospital gown from the lab that was basically white but had a little print because she had powers then). And overall we see her in lots of navy blues and grays. I'd like to associate her with pink because she feels pretty in it, but I'd also like her to be associated with yellow to add to Mike's confusion over his own feelings, and because to me it is a happy color like pink. But if I go full color theory on it, she'd be the color white, because she is an amalgamation and reflection of everyone she loves. She is a mix of all colors, so, white.

Eddie is the color black, I don't need to explain it, you've seen the dude. I can put a bit of red and white for fun, not for the Lumax reasons, but for horned devil reason, just to fully match his vibes.

Chrissy is pink, the whole fandom agrees, I'm not gonna mess with that one. Look at her, her whole personality is pink.

Robin is orange. Energetic, warm, but also always watering herself down to not be considered annoying (and not to be found out as a lesbian) because not many people can take orange in its full glory. And orange goes great with pink and baby blue wink wink nudge nudge

Which leads me to Steve, who makes me want to give up on his whole list because HE'S ALSO BLUE. He's always wearing blue. If it's not denim on denim, it's blue shirts/sweaters or his goddamn work uniforms WHICH BOTH ARE BLUE and I'm pretty sure S5 will have him in another blue uniform. We barely see him with any other colors EVEN THE HAWKINGS P.E. UNIFORM IS BLUE SHORTS with a gray shirt with blue letters. Why is this show like this.

Any and all feedback on this post is appreciated, because this is insane. I'm freaking lost.

[nczennie]

summer 1963.

Part One of She's Like The Wind

Pairing: Reader x Stray Kid's Lee Know AU: Summer love, based on the film Dirty Dancing Genre: Angst, Fluff (this part) Preview: “Yeah, I carried a watermelon.” The words tumble out of your mouth before your mind can comprehend them. At this, Minho spares you a judging glance that makes you feel small, not bothering another word before turning and walking back to the dance floor. Words: 7.9k *Warnings under cut

Warnings: Some curse words, mentions of food, eating, and being full, mentions and allusions to drug use and bad side effects of said usage, overall mature themes.

Your head lulls softly to the side, pulling your gaze to the window- the same green stretch of grass stuck in your view for the past couple of hours of your drive. The deep colors seem refreshing even in the summer heat, much more appealing than the grey concrete that you were accustomed to. 

Looking to your right, you see your older sister trying for the fifth time this hour to paint her toes a deep red without messing up with the occasional bumps on the road. In the passenger seat, your mom flips through a home decor magazine- one of the hundreds she brought to keep herself busy during the long ride to the countryside. Driving, your dad stays concentrated on the destination all while humming along to the songs coming from the radio. 

You’ve come to love the idea of spending your last summer with your family at a resort a couple of hours away from the city. When your parents first mentioned the idea, it seemed less than appealing- being more focused on quality time with your friends before everyone moved away for college. But now that you’re here, you’re glad to have this time with them knowing once you leave to the college an hour from home- everything will be different. 

You push those thoughts away for now-  the inevitable change that is making you more nervous by the day but you want to focus on what you have now. 

Not a half-hour later, the car makes its way on the dirt path to the large buildings surrounded by vast fields of green. The many guests loiter around outside, walking to their next destination or sitting, soaking up the sun. The closer you get, you spot a large lake just down the hill, complete with some volleyball nets and kids splashing in the water while their moms try their hand at tanning. 

The scene is so different than the summers you’re used to and suddenly you can’t wait to see what else there is in store here.

Pulling up to the front behind several other cars, your dad parks and gets out, everyone else following in suit. A worker, no doubt a high school student with a summer job, quickly comes to assist with taking your luggage out of your car. You let your eyes wander to him, feeling bad as he’s left to heavy bags by himself as your family follows your father- he’s just spotted the owner of the resort and his old friend and excitedly makes his way to greet him. Staying behind, you make your way to the back of the car and start to hand bags to the boy. He gives you a genuine smile, his eyes nearly closing as he does and you can’t help but return it. 

“You really don’t have to help, it’s my job, ya’know. You’re here to relax.” He claims as he places the bags on the bell cart. You smile softly, “I know, but it’s the least I can do. My sister tends to overpack, that would explain why we have eight suitcases when there’s only four of us.” You chuckle and the black-haired boy joins in. “Well, thank you for your help. I hope you have a wonderful stay.” He says piling up the last of the bags. “Thanks,” you let your eyes wander to his nametag, “Jeongin. Have a nice day.” 

Jeongin waves you off as you make your way to find your family. You’re thankful you don’t have to go far when you see them standing in front of the resort, your dad still talking to his friend. At your presence, your father puts his arm around you bringing you closer into the view of his friend, introducing you as his youngest daughter. 

“And this is here is my roommate and dear friend from college, Max Kellermen. He also owns this lovely place and invited us here for a stay.” Your dad smiles brightly as he talks about his friend. The middle-aged man politely shakes your hand as he smiles just as bright, the two of them clearly excited to catch up. 

“I have no doubt you and your family will have a life-changing experience here. This vacation will be like no other.”

After a slow afternoon of settling in and wandering around the property, you find yourself sat between your dad and sister at the dinner table. One of the nicer dresses you packed feeling much harder to breathe in after the five-course meal that was presented to you.  Dinner at the resort was held in a fancy ballroom-like hall where all the guests gathered to be waited on by the multiple waiters from the kitchen.  The whole thing was enjoyable but the events from the day were starting to wear on you. You quietly stir at your coffee, barely listening to your father who loudly babbles on to Max who has joined your table for dessert. 

“Is there anything else I can do for you all?” Your waiter for the night, a polite, handsome young man with an enjoyable sense of humor, asks checking in on you all once again. Max and your father smile up at him, “I think we’re good, Chan.” 

Chan smiles his charming smile and you speak up before he can leave, “Actually, can I have a box for my leftovers. I wouldn’t want to waste,” You finish off bashfully almost embarrassed by your comment. Your father nearly rejoices by it though, “That’s right, Chan. We could all use some boxes. Wasted food and hunger are the worst problems in our country, could you believe?” You feel second hand embarrassment by your fathers words, clearly being affected by the wine he had for dinner.  “You see,” he speaks to Chan and Max, “My youngest here is going to change the world. She starts college this fall and then after that, the Peace Corps that President Kennedy founded” He smiles proudly at you and you feel nauseous by the statement. You grew up close to your father, whereas your older sister enjoyed tea parties, ballet, and shopping trips with your mom, you tended to golf and volunteer with your dad. You suppose your closeness has allowed for him to push his views on you, so it shouldn’t surprise you at this point how much faith he puts into you and your nonexistent aspirations.

You hate it.

All this he talks of, college, peace corps, those are his dreams not yours. You fear that after all this time you lost a sense of who you are without your father's interference. You love the man to death, but hate the fact that you are living under his idea of a perfect daughter.

Max merely smiles at you before turning to your sister, “Well if she is going to change the world, what are you going to do, Daisy?” Your mother chuckles speaking up, “Oh, she’s going to decorate it.” 

It takes you all by surprise when Chan speaks up as he clears the used dishes, “I think she already does.” He smiles at her before excusing himself. You giggle at the redness of her face and give your mom a look knowing just how much your sister loved it.

The conversation drags even longer between the two and you’ve even ended up asking Chan for another cup of coffee to help keep the sleep off of you. 

Sometime later, a young man comes to your table seeking Max out, “Uncle, there you are. I’ve been waiting at our table or an hour now.” He chuckles and you glance over him.  Max lights up at his presence and stands to wrap his arm around his nephews shoulder, “Everyone, this is my nephew, Neil. He is one of the managers here at the resort.” He proudly smiles at the boy. Neil politely greets everyone before taking an empty seat next to his uncle, “You must be the family my uncle has been talking nonstop about all summer. He’s so excited you all could finally make it out.” He keeps a wide smile on his face, letting his eyes wander over everyone at the table. 

You keep a small smile on your face but inwardly groan at the thought of the conversation continuing any longer.  The next fifteen minutes are spent with your dad being utterly impressed with Neil as he talks nonstop about himself and his accomplishments for being so young. You don’t think you've ever heard one man talk for so long about only his own matters and it didn’t take long for you to be completely put off by the boy. 

Your relief came not long after when the boy stood, “Well, it was so nice to meet you all but I must be going. I’m due in the lounge to watch over the dancing.” He politely smiles. “There’s dancing?” Your sister asks curious about the activity she has yet to see at the resort.  “Oh, yes. Every night we have a live band in the longue and most guests come to dance the hottest dances- from the foxtrot to the mambo. We even have professional dancers staffed that can teach and demonstrate to the guests. It’s really great.” Neil explains the situation and Max nods along proud of the popular activity the resort could provide. 

Your mom and sister look to each other clearly interested in the activity whereas you could care less, never really have been much interested in dancing yourself.  You look up with a start as your dad calls your name, “Doesn’t that sound fun? You know, Neil, maybe you should take her over to check it out, I bet she would love it.” Your dad smiles excitedly and you realize quickly he was so impressed with the boy he’s started to play matchmaker. 

Trying your best to keep your emotions contained, simply looking to your father. “I don’t know, daddy. I’m quite tired from traveling today.”  “We don’t have to stay long,” Neil smiles at you, “You can just check the scene out that way you know where it is for other nights.”  “That’s a good idea, sweetie. Why don’t you go check it out for us and let us know if we should all go over tomorrow night.” Your mom speaks up nodding at you.

The longue is much bigger than you expected and the dimly lit room made for the perfect atmosphere. The live band continuously played upbeat and slower tunes to appease the large crowd of dancing guests.  Though, much to your dismay, Neil insisted on having one dance with you and yet here you both were three songs later.  You were never much of a dancer, not even interested in the deed during your final prom in the spring. Not much has changed as you stand swaying boringly back and forth with your partner. Though all the people around you seem to be having the time of their lives lazily moving to the music, you were bored from the moment you started. 

As Neil continues his nonstop talking, you begin to think maybe it’s your partner that is making the dancing so miserable. The owner's nephew was very polite, but it didn’t take long for you to realize just how full of himself he is. The past fifteen minutes were full of him going on about how amazing he is to have started managing- not one but three resorts, at such a young age. You were able to slip in a few words about how hardworking he must be but other than that, he seemed to be content with you just listening to his whole life story. 

The song finally comes to an end, the crowd stops their movements to applaud the band. You’re thankful for the opportunity to prepare yourself to tell Neil just how tired you were, but the band starts again- playing a much more upbeat tune than that of any you have heard the time you’ve been here. 

You look on with curiosity as the crowd starts to cheer and clap as a couple makes their way into the center of the circle the guests have carved out for them. 

Your eyes follow the couple in awe as they command the spotlight and start to dance, clearly much more advanced than anyone else in the room. 

You’re unable to even find it in yourself to leave Neil as you’re absolutely captivated by the way the pair move across the floor all by themselves. Eyes wandering to the boy as he swiftly and gracefully moves across the floor, effortlessly gliding his partner. 

A smile pulls on your face as he lifts her slightly, spinning her around letting the coral dress she’s wearing flow freely around her. The two were clearly professionals and watching their dance brought you joy as well as all of the other guests who stayed aside to watch their show. You had never seen professional dancers before but watching them now you were allured by their talent, unable to take your eyes off of them. Every part of their bodies seemed to move to every beat, everything about what they did seemed natural and intentional at the same time. “They’re amazing,” you let out as your eyes continue to follow the couple whose looks are as beautiful as their movements.  Neil scoffs from beside you, “Yeah, well they should be we pay them for it.” He shakes his head as he continues to watch their routine, “They’re supposed to be selling lessons to the guests but they’re just showing off.” You want to argue that everyone around them is clearly enjoying the act but you don’t bother using the energy to talk to the boy. 

You stay watching the couple, unable to tear your gaze away from every twist and twirl they make. They eventually end and bow respectively to the crowd who cheers loudly for their talents. Even then, your eyes stay focused on the gorgeous girl and boy who shines just as beautifully. You watch as they go their separate ways, making their way in the crowd to politely dance with some of the guests- a clear part of their attempt to sell lessons. You follow the boy’s head until you can no longer see it, mind wandering to ask your father to pay for dance lessons this summer. That would be a great idea, you thought, if only you liked dancing.

The next couple days of your vacation were uneventful- relaxing but nothing too memorable. You often found yourself wandering the resort by yourself as you parents partook in the multiple activities offered and your sister spent as much time as she could with the waiter, Chan. 

This night wasn’t much different as you wandered around the different paths of the resort after dinner, picking daisies that littered the grass. The sun had fallen long ago but you couldn’t find it in yourself to stay cooped up in the room when Daisy had gone into town with Chan and your parents were watching a screening of a new movie in the small theater within the hotel. So, much like any other time, you found your feet carried you outside and simply walked where you could. 

You hum along to a song that’s tune has been in your head all day as you hop along the rock-paved path going to the bottom of a hill you have yet to explore. Half way down, you notice the presence of another. It was a boy who seemed to struggling to carry something as he walked further in front of you. Squinting your eyes, you notice the boy is familiar. “Jeongin! Hey!” You call out with a smile, happy to see another person you know. You jog briskly down the hill to meet him where he stopped with a smile. You hold your white dress to keep it from flowing too far up and you make your way to the black haired boy, sending him a big smile as you finally reach him. “Hey,” he returns your smile and you look down to see him struggling to keep his grip on a couple of watermelons. You automatically go to grab one with a huff as it’s much heavier than you first expected, “Where are you going? I’ll help take this there.” Jeongin chuckles at you, “What? Don’t you have to go meet your manager boyfriend?” 

You frown at the mention of Neil, the boy clearly having seen your parents attempt of having you spend time with the conceded boy. Rather annoyed by his comment, you roll your eyes, roughly pushing the watermelon back into his arms and turn around to take your leave, disappointed by the boy you were originally pleased to see. 

“Hey! Wait! I was messing around, c’mon I could use your help.” You spin around, sending the boy a glare as you pull the extra fruit from his arms. Jeongin laughs and hoists the fruit he still has further up in his arms, “Well, let’s go then. But don’t you dare even mention what I’m about to show you.” he says the threat with such a light tone that you barely register what he was saying. “What do you mean?” You ask as you follow him further away from where you met. “Where we’re going is only for staff members, so you’re not even allowed to be there.” He says nonchalantly and your confused as to whether he is being serious or not. “And when I say that, I mean only certain staff,” he huffs as you two make your way up a hill, “So don’t mention it to nobody, especially not the manager.” You roll your eyes but refrain from biting back at the comment about Neil once again.

Finally making your way to a small wooden building, Jeongin roughly shoves the two doors open using the back of his body, making sure one of them stayed open long enough to safely let you in. Yet you’re so surprised by your new surroundings you can’t even find it in yourself to thank him.

Though the lighting is dim just like the dance lounge on the main resort - that is the only thing that you find familiar.  The room is hazy and filled with smoke and there is a loud booming from the speakers playing music from the record. A completely different genre from that of the live music you enjoyed at dinner and in the lounge. It sounds much like the music your peers listened to on their own record players when you visited their homes.

As you try to keep your gaze on Jeongin to follow him to the designated destination he had in mind, you find it nearly impossible. The room was crowded with workers who are enjoying their time off, dancing to the loud beat of an unfamiliar song.  And though you try your hardest to keep your eyes on Jeongin through the tight-nit crowd of people, you can’t help them wandering to take in just how the people around you are dancing. 

Never in your life have you seen just- frankly to put it; crude dancing. You weren’t really sure if you could call it dancing at all.

Pairs of people who pressed together so tightly it was nearly difficult to tell where one body ended and the other began.  There was groping with wandering hands and groins pressed and rocking together. Your cheeks flushed as were almost certain these moves were only meant to be done in private. 

Finally reaching your destination, you place the watermelon on an empty table beside Jeongin's. Wiping his hands on his jeans, he chuckles probably taking in your flustered reaction. “Do you like the dancing?” he moves a bit to lean back against the wood, moving his view the the crowd of moving people before you both. 

Following his actions, you move closer to him, making sure he could hear you even with the blaring music, “So they are dancing?”  You aren’t even sure yourself if your question is facetious or not.  Jeongin merely lets out a laugh, “Could you imagine if people danced like this out on the main floor?” He shakes his head just thinking about it, “Max would have all of our asses out on the street.” 

You smooth the fabric of your dress down, suddenly feeling self conscious of how you're dressed. Compared to those around you, you feel like you're dressed for church. "Wanna try?"Jeongin speaks up from next to you, raising his eyebrows, as you swiftly shake your head. There was no way you would dance like that. Not only did you not believe your body would move like that, but you were sure you would be far too embarrassed.

Your attention is drawn back to the crowd when everyone seems to let out a small cheer, looking you notice they make way for a new couple to join the dancing right in the center of the room, where everyone can see them. 

Immediately, you recognize the pair. 

It was hard not to, with the man striking features and the smoothness in which both of them move. Though this dance is completely opposite than that of what they danced to the last time you saw them.  You enjoy watching them nonetheless, you could hardly keep your eyes off of them, absolutely captivated by their swiftness. Automatically, your head starts to bob to music.  “They’re incredible!” You lean closer to Jeongin to express your fondness.  “Right? They’re the best this resort has. That there is my cousin, Minho. And his partner is Momo!” The boy has a smile on his face as though he is proud to introduce you to the talented pair he happens to know very well. 

“They make such a great couple.” You let out, even you could see their chemistry. 

“You would think so, huh? They’re not romantically involved though.”

Pursing your lips, you look at Jeongin after his comment, blown away with the information he just shared with you, “Seriously?”

He nods quickly, crossing his arms, “Oh, yeah. They tried it out once in high school, ended it two days later. Momo actually has a boyfriend who lives in town.”

You let out a small hum of acknowledgment, letting your eyes stay focused on the pair you two talked about, “And what about him, your cousin?”  The younger boy laughs beside you, “Oh he’s single, alright.” The current song comes to an end and some pairs start to break away.  Almost as if he knew you were talking about him, his cousin's eyes wander over to where you and Jeongin are resting. 

And much to your dismay, he starts to make his way over to you both.

As the boy makes his way in front of you both, you realize how intimidating he was. His dark eyes are sharp and unimpressed, sweat lingering on his face from dancing in the hot, crowded room. Maybe it was because you were aware you weren't supposed to be here, but you swear his gaze was intense enough to make you sweat yourself. You do your best to keep your eyes locked on his chest, his arms, his neck, anywhere that kept you from meeting his eyes. All the while you could feel his own locked on you.

“What is she doing here?” The older boy questions his cousin. “Oh, she helped me out on the way here. Saw me struggling and all.” Jeongin trails off as if to observe what his cousin’s reaction would be. “Yeah, I carried a watermelon.”  The words tumble out of your mouth before your mind can comprehend them. At this, Minho spares you a judging glance that makes you feel small, not bothering another word before turning and walking back to the dance floor. And as soon he turns your eyes rolls and you mumble to yourself about your idiotic words, shaking your head with a sigh as you wish you could forget the awkward encounter.

The next couple of songs play without incident; you stay by Jeongin's side, making idle small talk as you enjoy the music. All the songs being played are quite different from those that the live band play on the main floor, but you might even enjoy these songs even more. As each melody goes on you find yourself subconsciously moving and bobbing to the beat, especially as you watch everyone around you flowing along with the instrumentals. 

Continuing your small movements with a small smile upon your lips, your eyes wander around the room, taking in how the crowd changes their movements when a slightly more upbeat song starts to play. As your eyes make their way back to in front of you, the smile you once sported falls just as you still your body. You find a familiar dancer making his way straight towards you. 

He makes his appearance without a word, simply reaching out to grasp your hand with his nimble fingers. Minho gently gives you a tug, head nodding towards the dance floor as he walks you there. You feel your mouth slightly part in surprise but you find yourself unable to protest, head glancing back as Jeongin as he merely gives you a shrug, looking almost as confused as you are.

Minho doesn’t stop until you’re both in the middle of the dance floor, surrounded by the other moving bodies. He makes his way in front of you making sure he has your attention, “Watch.” You swallow deeply as the taller boy starts to move, simply swaying his hips back and forth to the beat of the song. “Go on.” He states again and you bite the inside of your cheek questioning if you would rather run back to his cousin than to attempt to dance in front of him, but you figure you can attempt this basic move he basically saw you doing before he dragged you out here.

You start to move after a deep breath, following along the best you could though you could already tell you were not nearly as smooth as the dancer.

“Good,” he nods his head “Now bend your knees, lower your hips.” He taps his pelvis to draw attention to the next move, his body now lower even as he continues his swaying movements.

Your body awkwardly lowers to try to match him and you suddenly become aware of how foolish you must look. A fish out of water compared to how smooth everyone is around you. Quickly glancing around you, you try to see if anyone else is seeing how awful you’re doing.

“Hey, look at me. Keep your eyes on me.” You draw your eyes back to Minho as he attempts to keep your attention on him. You do your best to keep everyone else around you out of your mind and hope you don’t draw their eyes in with your bad dancing. “Now roll your hips right,” he demonstrates slowly, “And then left.” He smoothly rolls his hips in a circle, alternating sides as he told you. 

When it was your turn to attempt you furrow your brows clearly having to concentrate more to get it done. He chuckles slightly at you but still praises, “Good, that’s it.” 

The two of you continue that for a moment before he creeps closer, grabbing your waist and pulling you flush against him. Your breath hitches in your throat as he holds your hips to his, having to place one of your hands on his bicep to keep you from stumbling, both of you still moving with the flow he taught you moments before. You can feel your face flush at the proximity and the mere movement you both are doing together. The only other time you can think of doing something similar involves the last boy you were with and being between the sheets, the movements could almost be the same you find yourself thinking. Only the thought flushes your cheeks even more.

As the two of you fall into a more comfortable rhythm matching the song, Minho starts to move more. He skillfully sways you both side to side even dipping you back slightly, your hand finding its way to his shoulder to steady yourself. It’s all much funner than you expected and you can’t help the smile that finds its way onto your face along with a giggle that breaks through your lips as he pulls you closer to him.

Unfortunately the fun and the song have to end at some point, Minho separates from you, magically twirling you around as the last notes of the song play. The crowd around you stops dancing and the room fills with claps and cheers end off the music. 

Still giddy, you clap along turning around with a smile only to find the boy was nowhere to be seen. 

Awkwardly stopping your movements, you flatten your hair and start to move through the crowd looking to make your way back to Jeongin, suddenly feeling red and flustered, your heart still pounding in your chest from the small dance you just shared.

It’s only a few short nights later that you find yourself in the presence of Minho once again, but this time the circumstances are very different. 

You stand under a well lit gazebo along with your parents and Max. The large platform acts as a dance floor, many bodies dancing classically to the soft music, a change of scenery from the usual ballroom floor. The fairy lights are bright enough to brighten up the whole area, the music plays from a record player in the corner; a contrast to the live band, and being outside once the sun goes down allows for a coolness to cover the space. It’s not much, but you are glad you decided to wear your cardigan. 

You stand closely to your mother, both of you keeping an eye on your sister who dances in the center of the place with Chan, who had the night off. Glancing up at her you both give each other a knowing smile at the kind boy that has caught Daisy’s eye this summer. 

As they move a bit from out of your sight, you bring your attention back to your father and Neil as they talk of their old college days. 

As the bodies continue to sway and move you can’t help but notice Minho among the crowd, his expert moves sticking out like a sore thumb. You watch as him and his partner move closer to the corner where you stood. You look at the girl in his arms and notice it’s not his usual partner Jeongin introduced to you as Momo. Instead this woman you could immediately tell was much older than Minho in age, that was obvious in appearance. And unlike Momo’s professionalism, this woman seemed much more interested in staying close to the boy rather than any real ballroom dancing. 

“Hello, Ruby. How are you doing?” You turn your head towards Max who speaks to the woman in Minho’s arms. She gives him a cunning smile, resting her head on the dark-haired boy’s shoulder, “I’m doing just fine, Max.” Max keeps a smile and nods as the pair continue their dance moving on along the room.

Once they’re far enough you hear Max sigh, “That’s what we call a Bungalow Bunny here.” This has the attention of both you and your parents, “They come every summer with their husbands, though their husbands only come down on the weekend. Ruby’s husband pays for her dance lessons,” he puts out his head to where she was with Minho. “It’s a difficult situation, she must be lonely.” He states and you swallow at his implications; that Minho is offering much more than dance lessons to this married woman. 

You find yourself getting sleepy the more you stand there, no longer interested in any of the conversation your father and Max find themselves having. And just when you thought your mood couldn’t be more sour, you spot Neil entering the gazebo and make his way over to the corner. You politely greet him but you dread it when he asks you to join him for a dance, “Oh I don’t know, Neil. I’m practically falling asleep here.” You force out a giggle to keep the atmosphere light. “Well how about a walk then? There’s a full moon tonight and the view will be beautiful by the lake.” 

You’re just as ready to turn his offer down again, but you feel your mom slightly push your lower back. You know right away what this means, go on with him. Though you dread it, you know it’s the right thing to do when his uncle is standing right next to you and he being the one to invite your family to stay at his resort. 

So that’s how you find yourself walking along the grass towards the lake, the moonlight being the only form of brightness in the night. Neil has been dragging on about how he got in an argument with one of the lifeguards and you haven’t been able to get a single word in since you started your walk. Finally getting to the dock, you take a deep breath and enjoy the view trying your best to block out Neil’s ramblings. 

Your view seems to almost be ruined though, when you feel the boy place his arm over your shoulder, “And I said, you know what Jimmy doesn’t have? Three hotels!” The boy laughs at his own joke and you give him a tight lipped smile to keep your rudeness at bay. 

But that seems to be getting harder to do when you feel Neil start to play with the ends of your hair, taking it softly in the tips of his fingers. “You know, when it comes time, there are much more important things than looks when choosing a man is involved.”

An unamused laugh leaves your lips as you slip yourself from out of his grip, “You know Neil, I’m actually kind of hungry. Maybe we can head back so I can have a snack.” He smiles at you, not at all fazed by your actions, “No problem at all, there’s actually a small kitchen for the staff in this building, we can grab you something there before heading back.” 

You follow him to the small building by the lake, you look around the dark building as Neil points out the sights. “And here is the kitchen, it’s pretty small but it’s usually just for the staff to have their lunches when they’re working around the lake.” He stands by the doorframe as you walk in the narrow kitchen. The boy continues to talk about some of the different staff schedules as you hear a small whimper coming from the corner. 

Looking alarmed at Neil, he doesn’t seem to notice as he continues his talking. Carefully you move further into the room pretending to look at the different arrangement of snacks. Finally you hear the sound more clearly and look in the corner, someone is hunched between the fridge and the wall. The person looks up and you fight the gasp that threatens to leave your throat. You make eye contact and immediately know who it is, you would recognize his partner anywhere.

Momo looks up from you, whimpering and shaking, clearly having been crying for who knows how long.  

You swallow quickly and trust your gut.

Turning around you make your way back to Neil, grabbing an apple in the basket by the door, “I think it will do, Neil. Thank you for showing me this, and for the snack. I think we should head back now, I wouldn’t want to worry my parents.”

“Of course, let’s go.” He shuts the door behind him and you make your way back to the gazebo as quickly as you can. 

Your heart is in your throat and you consider yourself lucky that Neil has separated himself from you by the time you get back to the gazebo. You try to think of the best way to approach the situation and decide it’s best not to interrupt Minho, whom you still barely know, especially when he’s with his client in the middle of the dance floor. Recalling from earlier in the night, you remember you saw Jeongin in the opposite corner from you, doing his job of handing out drinks to the guests.

Relief floods your system when you see the dark-haired boy in the same spot as before. Rushing over as quickly as you could without drawing attention to yourself, you finally place your arm on his shoulder. A friendly smile starts to form on his face but before he could even greet you, you bring your mouth to his ear, hand cupping around them both in order to tell him of the questionable situation you were in before finding him. 

His eyes widen at your words and he quickly makes his way to Minho in the middle of the floor, obviously not having the same worries as you did about interrupting him. You keep your eyes on the two boys and you notice Minho becomes just as alert as Jeongin when he tells him. There’s a part of you that is relieved you told the boys, it seems as though you made the right decision with how they’re reacting as you watch them rush out of the busy gazebo. 

And before you can tell yourself any better, you follow them.

The adrenaline is still high in your bloodstream as you follow both of the boys as they nearly run to reach Momo. You’ve realized long ago you really have no place to be here but your curiosity gets the best of you once again; you need to know what’s happened to the girl and you can only hope it’s nothing bad. 

“Do you know what happened?” you ask and they get closer to the location and Jeongin looks back as if he’s shocked you’re still there. He answers nonetheless, “She’s having a bad high.” The older doesn’t seem pleased by the information his cousin disposed and he nearly yells back at him, “Fuck, Jeongin! You can’t just go around telling people that shit.”

Your heart is stuck in your throat as you feel you’re being told off, perhaps you now know why curiosity killed the cat.

“Now she’s going to off to tell her manager boyfriend, gonna get us all fired” Minho mumbles even further and you can’t help but your blood to boil at the underming comment. “I would never tell anyone, I’m not some kind of snitch.” You bit back not even getting the chance to explain your nonexistent relationship with Neil before you’ve reached the destination. 

You stay put outside with Jeongin and Minho hurriedly picks up Momo and comes out to continue along the path. 

Figuring you’re already in deep enough, you continue to follow them to where you assume is their home for the summer. 

Further down the dirt road, you’re met with a series of small apartment-like houses; there’s a sign further up the hill reading “Staff Housing”. They’re quaint and obviously not as well taken care of as the main resort. The porch creeks under the weight of you all as you make your way into room numbered 143.

You stay put by the door you’ve closed behind you, keeping your hand on the handle; ready to leave if the hosts deemed your presence unnecessary (though you already knew it was). 

Watching quietly, you take in how Jeongin brings her a glass of water and Minho wraps her in a blanket, sitting beside her on the small couch and urging her to drink.

Momo must’ve had been alone for some time because she already seems to be sobering up and paying attention to Minho who rubs her back comfortingly. 

“You have to do the program, Mo.” He speaks softly to her and you listen carefully to their hushed conversation. 

Jeongin, who had made his way back to stand closer to you whispers to you, “There’s a program she’s found out about that could help break the addiction.” You nod at him, silently thanking him for explaining to you once again. 

The girl finishes her water and the boy beside her repeats himself once again, softly removing the hair from her face in order to look at her properly. She scoffs in return, turning her head away from his hands, “You know I can’t.”

“Why not?” You speak, what you meant to be a whisper where only Jeongin could hear but your voice comes out much louder than you intended. The couple on the couch look at you and your face flushes with the feeling you don’t belong. 

“The program costs a lot of money,” Jeongin murmurs, still answering your question whether the other two wanted it to be known or not. 

Momo, who seemingly just noticed you were here, stares at you for a second before speaking up herself, “Yeah, try three hundred dollars. That’s a whole summer’s worth of paychecks.” She leans back into the couch but keeps her cold gaze on you, “But you wouldn’t understand that, would you? Must be nice to have access to daddy’s money.” 

It’s clear the words are spoken with the purpose to hurt you but you don’t make a move, not giving her the satisfaction. It feels as though you both are in a staring contest until Jeongin makes the first move, “I’ll make you a sandwich, you should eat.” Momo turns her eyes to the younger boy, giving him a smile and you take the chance to quietly leave the room you were never welcome in.

You knew you shouldn’t let the words Momo said affect you so much, she had not been in the right state in the first place. But nonetheless, her comment played through your head as you toss and turn in bed that night. 

The next morning you found yourself trekking to the golf course bright and early to find your father. Walking along in the cool morning you’ve tried to justify your actions by convincing yourself what you’re about to do is for the sake of helping someone else. But no matter how many times you repeat it, you know that’s not the reason at all for your petty actions.

“Daddy!” You call out finally locating your parents practicing their putting. Grabbing his attention, he looks up with a smile, “Good morning, my love. Did you already have breakfast?”. Keeping the bright smile on your face you go to hug him, “I was on my way to but thought I would say good morning first since I didn’t see you last night.” 

He hums, taking another hit at a ball. “Daddy, about last night,” you start recalling the lie you’ve made up, “I made a friend and she’s trying to buy a place ticket. Her mom is sick and she wants to go home and see her but she has no way of affording it.” He silently looks at you and you take the chance to continue, “She’s a worker here and they don’t pay enough for her to buy it herself.” 

He nods and hits another ball, “And what do you suggest we do?” You make your smile a bit smaller, “I was hoping we could help her, daddy. As a doctor I know you always help people in need so I thought this could be my way of helping her, wouldn’t that be nice?” 

Knowing you’ve hit a soft spot with him as he tries to hide his smile, you keep your own bashful. “I suppose you’re right. I’m so lucky that my daughter has a good heart like you. I’ll write you a check at lunch.”

Walking into the workers lounge late that night, you feel almost powerful with the check in your hand. You confidently make your way in, moving through the bodies closely dancing together until you spot Jeongin on the side of the room. 

You make your way to him giving him a smile which he returns. Just to the right you notice Momo dancing with Minho to the calm song playing over the speakers and you take the chance to approach her. Jeongin follows closely, either curious about what you have to say or worried she won’t be happy to see you. 

You slightly tap Momo on the shoulder, grabbing both her and Minho’s attention. Motioning for them to follow you, you go to the edge of the dance floor where they could hear you better. 

The pair follow without question, obviously curious about what you have to say. They stare at you for a moment and you hold out the check to her, “Here.” 

She cautiously grabs the paper and looks shocked when she realizes what it is, “Are you serious right now?” Minho looks just as surprised, grabbing the check to look at it himself. You merely nod at her, keeping your face serious. “How did you get this?” The dancer speaks up as he examines the check and you keep your gaze steady, “It was easy, all I had to do was go ask my daddy.” You look at Momo raising your eyebrows, “Right?” You can’t help but the petty comment to slip your lips but you thought it was the least she deserved. 

She bashfully looks down and takes the check, passing it back to you, “Thanks, but I can’t take it.” 

Your eyebrows furrow, “Why not?” Your confusion grows as even the man beside her looks shocked, “Yeah, why not? You need to take it, Mo.” She merely shakes her head and it’s Jeongin who finally speaks up. “The program takes place on Thursday nights,” at the comment Minho seems to understand, a frown forming on his face. 

“What does that mean?” Jeongin looks at you, “They both have another gig at a hotel a little away from here. If they don’t show up they lose their spot not only this summer but next summer too. They need the money,” he trails off.

You think quickly, “Well can’t someone else take your place?” Minho rolls his eyes at your suggestion, “No, no one can take her place. Everyone works around here but that’s not something you would know about.”

Eyebrows furrowed, you feel fed up with the comments about your work ethic and you’re half tempted to grab the check and leave, never having to talk to them again.

But before you can even process, Momo lights up, “That’s right! It’s perfect, everyone does work but she doesn’t! She can take my place!” You already panic at the weird idea and you can see right away Minho does too, “What, absolutely not! She’s not a dancer!” 

His cousin on the other hand seems to agree with Momo, “I think it’s a great idea! I mean, you were literally just teaching her how to dance the other night, weren’t you?” Jeongin states almost smugly. At this Momo turns her head to Minho, raising her brows, “Well, then that’s that.”

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[hadesam]

What a scene!

Everybody wants to be seen

Bright and white jeweleries all being clean

Free with different themes and dressing like a tree

Day to night, from a gala to a club

Money everywhere and checks to rub

Limitless cards yet never out from bars

Wasting anywhere

Wasting everywhere

When it comes to donations who are u to dare?

In need indeed unlike u, all u care about is to breed

Parties, bars

Champagne and cars

When u hear their voices u claim u have nthn to do or make

Then offer them to eat "CAKE"

Gala, clubs

Wine and pubs

Games indeed, monopoly and hunger that u seed

From weed and biscuit moving on to a district

Peace is the sign

Standing tall with faces filled with a smile.

Mines anywhere, bombing everyone everywhere

Buildings and hospitals exploded like a program being coded

I don't think I see gray even though it's still a day

And that's what we call black.

Shaming and cursing at them holding peace flags

Losing bodies and souls yet brightly smiling and focusing on their goals

Unlike those claiming the roles and acting like assholes and whoes

Destruction and war yet u can still see the spark in their eyes and the hope in their hi's

And that's what we call white.

An existing land for centuries should never end

Can't see the grass anymore

But still can feel it in spite of the mess

Heads up to the sky filled with what we call dream

And that here is what we call green.

Rotten hearts, empty minds

Soulless gazes, cruel phases

Beheaded civilian, not one but more than a million

Tortured, Burned and families praying to Lord

Ripped apart and this is not even the start

Lake at night

Dark color, is it a flood of mud?

So many doubts but I can assure u it's blood

Some seem to be sleeping peacefully in a bed

However, many others will rise from the dead

And that's what we call red.

[sunny6677]

Ramble about how my day went—

My day went kinda okay compared to yesterday. Sky looked pretty as per usual and it was all cloudy and cool this morning. I've been getting into taking photos of stuff a lot for some reason. And along the bus ride, I admired the scenery from outside and took some videos of it, but I won't be sharing them. The grass always looks really green and pretty tho.

Had some Gatorade for breakfast since I didn't wanna eat anything they were serving, and sat with my friends. Then I went to Psychology once breakfast was over—the lesson kinda went off track because the teacher and the students kept talking, and we were also doing an introduction thing to the next unit.

I ended up going to Spanish next, which was really fun since it was someone's birthday and the teacher themed the lesson around birthdays this time around. She kept talking about food though and that just ended up making us all hungry jdndndn

And then in Chemistry, we just cut some stuff out and glued it in our notebooks. Kinda messed up halfway through, but my friend helped me out. My other friend was also kinda having trouble the whole time.

And then in Technology, we kinda literally just got to play games all day because we're apparently gonna make some thing about how we think the animation in said game works. I ended up creating a Roblox account and played Natural Disaster Survival and Resturant Tycoon it til the period was over.

Lunch came around, and the sky was all bright and blue and the grass was really green as well. It was really warm though like usual. I only ended up eating two chip bags and a coca cola for lunch, and my other other friend stole a small gummy thing I packed cuz he wanted it (he usually always wants my food—). I just joked around with my friends the whole time and played some more Roblox on my phone.

Then English came around—we read some more of a book we're currently reading (It's called Monster and it's about this sixteen year old boy on trial for murder but I can't remember who wrote it), and once we finished with that, we did a small activity. While waiting for everyone else to finish, I also doodled Lila and Carmen on the board. Don't have any photos of it tho. We ended up having to read what we wrote for the activity aloud, and I have a very quiet voice, so I had to talk in my 'radio' voice when reading 😭

Theater came around as well—and I worked on a Tablo about the Three Little Piggys with my group since we were doing fairytale themed ones. We kinda goofed off the entire time though and couldn't stop laughing. We were put on hold because someone fainted in the hallway apparently, so we were given a few more minutes of class. Still hoping whoever it was is okay. We got time to perform our tablo at the end of class tho.

Then Geometry—my normal teacher who makes me really uncomfortable wasn't around and just the coach who actually owns the classroom, so I got to work on my geometry assignment in peace without being interrupted or asked a bunch of personal questions or being stared at. My wifi ended up going wonky about halfway though and I had to sit in boredom for the last few minutes of class til it was time to go.

As for my last period which is World History—we just did some test thing which went by surprisingly fast, but the boys were kinda talking during studying time and making it hard for some people to focus. Not sure what grade I got yet but I think I did well. I was given a different version of the text because of my autism I think. Not sure why I actually received a different version though. I went on my computer and watched spooky month for a bit til it was time to go.

And then on the bus ride back, I watched a Phisnom vod, drew the Mauve image I drew for her blog on the way, and recorded some more videos of the drive because of how pretty it looked outside.. that's pretty much it.

[ohnomytummy]

I went on vacation recently and helped myself to a buffet breakfast before going out to the theme park. My tummy is super skinny so when i eat a lot like i did that day i look embarrassingly pregnant. Like seriously it’s bad. Since it was so hot i had no choice but to wear a crop top and shorts so everytime i walked to and from the buffet station I’d suck in my gut or hide it with the plate of food 😵‍💫

After about 4 trips I was stuffed and had to head out to the park with my stomach being an overfilled and bloated mess. Basically I spent the next 2 hours sucking it all in and letting out desperate farts while I walked around and took advantage of bathroom trips to let my gut hang out freely and try to calm it down.

I was wondering what you’d do if you were there with me? Maybe stuff my poor tummy even more throughout the day and make it more obvious that I’d been pigging out so much, not to much how much gassier I’d get later on and the damage I’d do to a toliet..

Theme park? With a belly full of free hotel breakfast?

How do you like greasy park food?

I’d parade you around to all the stands, ordering something heavy and delicious from each one. Find a picnic table somewhere secluded where we could return to feed you, like a bloated animal on a gluttonous hunt for more, quickly shoving fried everything into your belly, feeling your shirt ride up and the crumbs fall down your chest. I’d encourage you the entire time, rub your bare lower belly softly while you dine.

When you finish I let you rest for a minute before smiling and gently pulling you back towards the park. Aiming for one thing: the spinning teacups. When you realize, your face goes pale and your belly gurgles knowingly, sickly, pushing up a burp and a moan from deep within. You protest quietly while we walk, one hand soothing your tight sides, the other entwined in my own. I kiss your cheek and tell you how much I want to see you spin around, how much I want to feel you try to hold everything down desperately while the rides in motion, not wanting to be the disgusting talk of the park. So embarrassing…so full…

We wait in the line of families and other couples. Your belly is so loud, your cheeks are turning a light, sick green. We get to the front and the ride operator takes a long look at you, absorbing your gluttonous, sick state then giving me a knowing wink and small smile. I hear him whisper, “good luck” as we pass to claim our pastel painted teacup. You’re gonna need it, too. We sit down and your shirt immediately bunches up high on your stomach as your belly bloats against the turning table in front of us. You burp and groan softly then move my hand over your gut. We lock eyes as the ride chugs to a start and I remove my hand from you to begin turning the ride.

Faster, faster, faster. I never stop watching you. Your eyes are clenched as shit as your lips, your cheeks puffed out like a cartoon. The motion makes you look like you’re growing, and even over the wind I can hear the sound of your overstuffed guts desperately try to figure out why it’s going in circles.

We spin for what feels like an hour. You can’t even wait for the ride to stop before groaning “oh god I need to get off…” and scrambling off the ride. Hands clutching your grossly swollen abdomen, you make a dash for the exit. But then, you trip. Your knees hit the ground and you retch. Hard. Your greasy, sugary, delicious feast is now coming up onto the grass uncontrollably. Everyone else is shamefully looking away or twisting their faces at the sight and sound of you. “What a pig,” they must be thinking. But I make my way towards you, taking in your state, knowing this is only the beginning for you and your troubles.

I reach your heaving body and wrap my arms around your back, squeezing your belly, forcing up the oldest piles of food from you. Then, quietly, so low no one but you can hear, I whisper “let’s go home and clean you up. You deserve a reward for giving everyone such a show.”

[crimsonfluidessence]

Prompt 2: Horizon

Content Warning: Heavy mental health themes, Endwalker spoilers

The green grass beneath Esredes' feet rested nice and soft on the legs as he sat down at the top of the hill and watched the sky. The sun had not yet come up, the sky still dark and littered with black stray clouds, but any minute now, the pigment would creep its way into the sky, and morning would begin anew. Up on top of this hill, Esredes was alone as he waited for the sunrise, just as he had been the last few days. But it wasn't long before the silence was interrupted by the audible plop of another sitting next to him. He turned his head to be met with a mess of black hair and curious, lively garnet eyes that guided the younger half Elezen. And she stared right at him while holding up a piece of meat.

"Raw meat for your thoughts?" Esredes blinked at her. "...I'm not hungry yet." He simply offers, looking back at the sky. "Tell me what's going on then." It was not a request. He could tell from the teenager's tone, the way someone might ask their sibling to hand over a toy. "Just my morning routine." Esredes offered. "I want to watch the sunrise." "New routine then. What changed." Once again, it was not a question. "...I thought it would be a good idea." He said. "The sunrise is... beautiful and exciting. Why not get up to see it. It starts the day off right." "It helps, then." "...Yes." Esredes said. Silence hung heavy a moment, before he decided to speak again. "I want to watch and wait for when the sun truly comes up," he said. "It wasn't yesterday, and it wasn't the day before, and I'm not sure it will be today, either. But I want to see it come up, even if it doesn't." "...Explain." Esredes hesitated. "...I don't know when it's going to come up." He said. "I haven't seen it come up since... that night." Only Witchdrop can judge your innocence now, the words echoed in his mind. "Though, maybe it didn't come up before then, either. I don't know- you still go there. Does it come up for you?" "You're going to have to explain this clearly, Tea Rose." Something in her slightly firm tone made him suspect she already knew. "When did you last see the sun rise, and you knew it truly rose." Esredes said. "That's what I want to see. What I want to remember." She stared at him intently and offered no words. "...I feel like you want to say something, but you're not going to." Esredes sighed. "And that's... fine. If you... want to keep sitting here, we can watch, but. I won't ask you to if you're busy."

She offers him no further words. Instead, she wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a tight yet gentle hug, a hand raising up to pat his head gently and brush his hair with her fingers. To this, he puts an arm around the teenager in return, and leans his head into her shoulder slightly. "Thank you."

"All clear."

Esredes pushed his way through the old, rickety door into the cabin. The humble little wooden enclosure met him with little to nothing to offer- just a small bedroom, two-person dining room table, small kitchen, and a single couch. With this, a diluted kaleidoscope of noises greeted him- the creak of the wood, the rush of the wind outside, but most of all, a strange noise that he'd become all too familiar with. Music. Low and eerie, lifeless music played through the entirety of the little space, one he'd heard far more times than anyone should in their life. "Our Home on the Horizon..." The music echoed that same, repetitive lyric that filled Esredes with a sense of cold the outside couldn't produce, as he turned to stare at the radio on the dining table responsible.

With a sigh, after searching the entire house and the perimeter, Esredes reluctantly held a hand out and took the horrid device in one hand. He had decided since coming to Ilsabard he hated these things- if there was ever a box that could capture spirits, it would have to be this one. This repetitive, droning, creepy song felt as if it contained the trapped energy of so many dead, from the distorted and eerie singing to even the piano that played as if by a ghost. Did Garleans all seriously listen to this and think it was patriotic? And Esredes thought Ishgard was bad... As that lifeless, empty music droned on in its endless repetition, Esredes went outside the cabin and stared at the dark, snowy sky that greeted him and the rest of the rescue team.

"Our Home on the Horizon..."

Towards the sky, he started back on foot to camp, wondering to himself if these people had ever seen the sun rise like he had. Did they believe it rose every day as long as they killed everyone who wasn't them, or were they like Ishgardians, who killed in hopes of filling the empty void and still never saw the sun rise? His footsteps left print after print behind in the snow. Once another round of it came, they would be covered and erased, much like the ones of whoever lived there long ago. Esredes shut his eyes and muttered to himself quietly in Dragonspeak. "Scattered upon thy winds of love and comfort, thou shall find the way home," the prayer translated to. Given the nature of Garleans, they would more than likely hate that he even tried to pray for them. But that didn't matter. He simply wondered to himself as he walked when they would see the sun rise. Perhaps he too, could find a way to help...

"Our Home on the Horizon..."

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary290

7/5-6/24

friday - saturday

it is done!!!!!!!!!!!

i will probably do a proper post for it tomorrow, some time, like in the noon (not that it will get any people to listen really)

but here's the linxx!

and then here's the cover art!

#so funny (if you want to see what's going on, you should probably open it up in a separate tab and look at it zoomed in to see all the junk going on)

i'm glad i did the watermarks on the pics at the bottom there, it makes it kind of look uncomfortable, or like seedy i suppose, which helps a lot w/ what the cover is aiming for.

i think basically it's as good as i could have gotten it, the cover. i do like it, i feel like maybe i could do it better, if i planned it out more, maybe it looks like a mess to anyone else, it's kind of one intentionally but i mean, maybe in a bad way it's one too.

also, on bandcamp i wrote a big-ish thing about the album as it was made, here it is:

likely in progress since october of 2022, certainly in progress since november of 2022, finally complete in july 2024. these are songs about nothing especially. this album has seen: two apartments, one move, two jobs, a cockroach infestation, a mass shooting at the neighboring school of our last apartment, my girlfriend surviving the shooting because she was in a different building and he wanted to kill teachers because he did not get a job, the most traveling i've done in my life, myriad illnesses, various canker sores, working out through being sick, not recovering sooner because i had to work out because it would upset me to not complete the ritual as i normally do, the worst sore throat of my life, an ear infection, the starting of a public diary, the maintenance of a public diary, ants on the windowsill, ants in the flour, long standing friendships growing longer, shedding of irritability, regrowth of the irritability, self disgust of varying levels and varying causes, scrubbing the floor naked, bruising my knees at the melt banana show and bruising my knees doing kneeling squats and bruising my knees doing other things, the uneasy orbit of a sleep schedule (an asteroid almost, in capture, then, crashing), several remasterings, 2 computers, an apartment that's a single room, an apartment of multiple rooms cheaply constructed, inflation, grocery store packages changing graphic design, rotten fruit, eaten fruit, my girlfriend's mother loving then hating then loving us, rabbits in grass, rabbits on concrete, bird corpses and living birds and horses in a field for the rodeo and the bulls kept across from them moaning of a captivity under moonlight, the construction and completion of the las vegas sphere (orb of prosperity), numerous nightmares about being murdered, denver colorado, kyoto, tokyo, takeshita-dori street, all the green, a place where sad old gay men convened and sang karaoke remembering their youth in old mecha anime theme songs, a fashion magazine photographer speaking in english to me (stumbling in a beautiful way) "i hope to see you again one day", arizona and the asu campus, a strange fall fair where a woman told me to hold two pumpkins to my chest so it'd be like i had breasts (she seemed supportive), the strange trump-loving foodtruck that served elote that my gf liked, my most recent live performance with thomas since 2018, my girlfriend learning korean, completion of multiple books, falling in love with foucault as i did when i first read him in college, meeting people for the first time, meeting some for the second, sleeping on a bed in chicago, loving chicago, people staring at me in public, children staring at me, wondering if children hate me because at my root there is something wrong with me and everyone except me can tell, being published in various online journals, the coming first publication of my work in print, in a journal people hold in their hands of flesh, nothing special, everything special, stretches of relative silence, all the meaningless stuff, all the stuff i don't want to tell you because i like it too much. i already gave you too much, most likely. you will not have a sense of any of this as you listen to the record. i put it here, i don't know why. this album is 32 songs, 47-ish minutes long. you can click a button on a web site to listen to it, and you will hear it. 

credits

released July 5, 2024

Girlfriend - let me live, took me places, bought me food, let me cook, let me clean. m.b. ghul + clout jesus - voiceover/narration on track 1. please read his story here:

thomas / me and my kidney - let me use his microphone and audio interface to record extra vocals on panic! at the costco and au naturale. please listen to his music here:

georges bataille - wrote the sentence which i lifted for the album title (letter to kojeve where he begins talking about unemployed negativity) thomas hardy - wrote tess of the d'urbervilles which i quote on the final song. neighbors - let me scream and didn't ever complain or call the police. hospital terrorizer - i screamed and i wrote the songs and i made the cover and stuff.

but since i am on my blog i guess i can get into more detail about the record, and i also feel like anyone who reads this / has been reading this, you have actually seen what it's been like, the hostility of the little bit of writing i did for the album isn't really pointed back here, it's not necessarily a pose it's just like, i dunno, as a thing to make, there's so much time and effort, and most of that's invisible, that's not being said in a self pitying way, it's more about how that's the case for so much music, which makes it interesting, i think.

anyway, there's one song here called 'i didn't think before i started a diary' which isn't really about this diary, i wrote that song prior to even starting this, it's about something weird you can see w/ people who do have diaries on the internet, where some people like, years after they're done being updated, things like that, or even just posts / miniature diaristic stuff, of archiving all that, when really this is more about the practice/act than an archive to reach into history with. it was also inspired by a piece of poetry by a friend though i don't know if i could even find it. it's written from the perspective of someone wanting to archive a person, and i kept thinking about that from the other side. that's really the only song i have so much to say on i think, because the others are either a little more personal or a little more obvious, there's lots of political things, the song hell baby works off of a reference to hideshi hino's hell baby, the manga where a deformed baby is thrown into a dump and she is revived by flaming ghosts and wanders back to her family and then is shunned once again. it's really tragic.

anyway i know i said i'd have more pictures from yesterday to post but i've been busy all day with trying to get everything like ready enough, some songs feel a little odd still but that just seems like how they are, it's only 2 that feel a little odd and idk, if i really hate them eventually i will just remaster them and release them together or something but they sound good to me, i think i'm caught off guard by them because there's a newness about them, because i worked on one up to the last bit here, and another was the product of an error related to a crash where the .wav came out normal but the mp3 came out strange sounding i think, so i had to go back and re export. either way both sound good/cool just unexpected to me, and i am someone who had expectations that were precise about those songs, specific things about what frequencies were blasting when and how stuff sat, and then that's just new now.

tomorrow i have to make like... 3 posts inside the internet world, to make people maybe look at my album, and then it will be entirely/totally out of my hands, it will truly be over then, that's like the advertising period i get, lol, one day.

anyway i am super super tired right now, so i will sleep,

byebye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[druckkugelschreiber]

Can’t get over the fact that I had a Mario party themed + magical fight dream where Team Andy (I was on Team Andy) was fighting Team Quynh and it was basically like capture the flag in this very whimsical dream land with pastel colours and green glittering grass, magical flowers and all that while we brutally murdered each other over and over with magic and arrows and everything to keep Quynh away from our flag.

Like our flag was down this tunnel (all purple and pink and very very tight) and I was guarding it while Andy and the Main team were off to get Quynh‘s flag and I was over here with the support crew. I mainly fought with bow and arrow (that one carried over very nicely from my hunger games dream) but was also very good with magic.

So Quynh managed to get past us after some fighting and I slipped after her down the tunnel, which opened into a beautiful clearing in the middle sat our flag (it was actually an orb but whatever).

She had her hands almost on the flag, I aimed and shot at her with my arrow and the way that fucking thing connected with her, dug into her back and she fell over black hair flying and all is forever burned into my brain.

Obviously she got back up, being immortal and all and then we fought with magic, getting frosted by a killer rose, throwing her around with wind magic and all until the fight was declared over and some parents told us to clean up the mess. It was so… gruesome in a way even though there was no blood.

And the audacity of this dream to not even show me Andy.

[thepixelpenguin]

EXOGARDEN LOG #3

Hi! Now is a bad time to be picking up extra hobbies, but my brain doesn't seem to care. Still, I found some time for this one, too. My Minecraft mock-ups are fully realised now, but I'm not sure about uploading them. They probably won't make a lot of sense without knowing what each block represents, and they do kind of spoil the whole game. Nice scenery though. Heck, maybe I'll just post one of them...

But for now, some more plants!

🌼Webbed Flytrap🌼

Fallaranea muscipula

Home planet: Zion

A maroon and yellow flower with a spider-like construct framing its petals, with a gooey nectar web stretched between. If it detects a small creature, the legs close in on its prey, trapping it for gradual digestion. The legs of the flower use a hydraulic system to keep the pressure high enough to trap the creature.

Although this would've fit quite neatly into the jungles of Elysium, that place was getting populated enough as it was, and a carnivorous spiderweb made for a much more Zion-esque idea than the Fractal Fern. I had to have at least one carnivorous plant, and having one based on a carnivorous animal AND a common piece of set dressing seemed only natural. It makes for quite a believable image!

🌼Hopper Grower🌼

Petrophilium bisemutium

Home planet: Ketumati

A simple leafy plant with a pink inflorescence, smooth leaves, and a metallic sheen. The flowerhead is peculiar: the sepal is flexible and colourful, but there are no actual petals. At the base of its stem is a large bismuth crystal which grows around it. The plant doesn't grow in existing crystals, but rather excretes excess bismuth absorbed from the rocks it grows on.

Yes, bismuth crystals really do look like that: they're my favourite for a reason! I knew I had to include it in a world themed around chemistry and general ethereal vibes. Oh, it's a fun one. It dances into the realm of fantasy a little more than the others, but that's part of the art. The faux flowerhead here makes it seem a little more inorganic than most, but it's not at all alien. It turns out flower morphology can be VERY deceptive. Some petals aren't really petals, some flowers aren't even really flowers, it's a mess! Tulips are an odd example: half the petals are actual petals, but the outer petals are just barely distinguishable sepals. Also daisies are a hundred flowers in one? I need a break from flowers...

🌳Furball Tree🌳

Laevidendron eriophyllum

Home planet: Eden

A usually short and sparse tree with little whorls of leaves that have a very soft texture. These leaves grow in separated round clusters on the surprisingly smooth branches. The tree also sprouts fluffy lilac blossoms but only on the side facing downwind

What, you didn't think flowers were the only thing I had to offer, did you?! I'm trying to group my drawings by the category of plant, so expect to see some more trees and grasses as time goes on. This is the first tree you see in the game, hence it earning the privilege of "Tree" in its name. I've never repeated a word in the common names, just to show the sheer diversity of plants there are, and to make it easier to specify them! It does require rather awkward constructions like "Hopper Grower", but hey, I like the half-rhyme and double-entendre.

Anyway, the Furball Tree. I wanted something friendly and whimsical, but a little more realistic than Dr Seuss! I hope you can see what I'm going for: it's like natural topiary. It looks quite sparse in my drawings, but it is supposed to be able to fit in a garden, after all. They probably get no taller than 5 metres. The blossom is just for extra prettiness, a perfect match with the Foreign Flyer, and it makes for quite a handy impromptu compass, incidentally.

===

Oh, I promised you a Minecraft world, didn't I? Well, I can't think of an easier way to do it, so... here.

https://www.planetminecraft.com/project/eden-evergreen-green-exogarden/

You might recognise the Furball Tree and Foreign Flyer, but the rest of the plants I've yet to reveal, of course. Still, it's quite a nice example of things to come. I hope with every passing post, you can see there's more depth to this than I can possibly hope to convey with a few drawings in my spare time... oh well.

[silvaswiftcast]

FFxivWrite2023 Prompt #24 (Free Day): Caught in the Rain

Characters: Silva Cataracta, Ricmorn Cataracta, and Hien Rijin

Rating: Explicit

Notes: Words contained in [brackets] are in another language, in this case, it's Doman.

Content Warnings/Additional Tags: Polyamory Relationship (V Relationship), M/F/M relationship, Kissing, Nudity, Biting/Marking, Groping, Suggestive/Sexual Themes, Playful Banter/Teasing, Hair Pulling/Tugging, Vaginal Fingering, Oral Sex, Outdoor Sex, Leading up to Sex, Threesome.

The sound of bright, bubbly giggles and deep chuckles filled the air as the Lord of Doma finally cornered the small Raen, her back pressed against a stone wall in their secret garden. One of his large hands settled on her waist as the other tangled itself into her short purple and magenta waves, tilting her head to the right so he could press sweet kisses to her soft skin and the cool ivory scales decorating the side of her neck.

“Hien— Wait!” Silva laughed, feeling him grin against her as his mouth found her pulse point. “We’re going to get — fuck, do that again — c-caught!” The amused hum beside her horn was maddening in the right way, and so was the flick of warm tongue to the love bite he had just left behind.

“That dear husband of yours is being nice and keeping a lookout for us,” Hien assured her. His hazel eyes found her sea-green ones clouded with hunger looking up at him and the soft whimper escaping her as the pad of his thumb stroked across her bottom lip went straight to his hardening cock. “And if you stay quiet, anyone who happens to walk by on the other side of this wall won’t know any wiser, [wildflower.]”

Ah. So that explained the shit-eating smirk Ricmorn has been wearing for most of the day. They planned this.

These two sneaky, sly bastards and their devious tricks. But gods, she loved them.

“B-but don’t you have a—” The dancer lost her train of thought when the tips of his fingers grazed along the inside of her bare thigh — so close to where she needed him to be — and stopped, his lips returned to leave a trail of hot kisses down her throat. How dare he tease her so. “A meeting to attend s-soon?” she finally asked when her brain could put together words again. It was almost embarrassing how long it took. “I would hate for you to—”

“I have forty-five minutes to kill, sweetheart. We have time,” he whispered next to her horn. His ears heard the faint gasp at his words and how her long tail swished with excitement in the tall grass under her feet. “Time to do whatever we want.”

When she reached for the colorful sashes and obi holding his dogi closed, pulling him impossibly closer before her fingers quickly removed them, the young lord knew he had his sweet Raen exactly where he wanted. And he refused to let her escape from his grasp.

Not until he made her a boneless mess, her mind hazy with lust and loss elsewhere.

“So you’re choosing to spend it sneaking in a moment of debauchery with me, my lord?” she teased as she shoved his dogi off his shoulder. Silva didn’t miss the desire swirling in his pretty orbs or how his breath hitched when she trailed her fingers down the front of his chest plate to play with the ties to his pants.

“You say that as if it’s a bad thing.”

A bad thing? Never. And she knew she didn’t have to say it out loud, for he understood.

“What would your advisors think if they knew?”

She let out a small squeak of surprise when his lips claimed hers in a rough, bruising kiss — one she was more than happy to return. “For the moment, I couldn't care less about what they think,” she heard him rasp. The rough sound sent a bolt of levin down her spine. Hien caught her in another deep kiss, and she couldn’t hold back the low whine when the fingers dancing along her thigh moved to stroke her core through her wet smalls. “Kami, I’ve missed you these past two weeks,” he mumbled against her parted lips. “The way you smile and laugh without a care in the world, how your gorgeous eyes glimmer in the sunlight when you wake up beside me in the morning. I would love to show you how much I’ve missed you, Silva — if that is what you desire.”

It was exactly what the Au Ra so desired from her beloved lord.

“Hien—” she breathed, playfully tugging on his ponytail to get him to look at her and savoring the groan escaping him.

His lips twitched up into a wide grin at her flustered appearance, deep chuckles shaking his chest. “Yes, [wildflower?]”

“Less talking and more kissing, touching, teasing, and love-making, please.” 

She needed this just as badly as he did.

Silva could have sworn she heard Ricmorn’s laughter ringing in her ivory horns from nearby. The rich sound filled her chest with warmth and shook her bones. She would have to deal with her Auri husband later.

“[As my lady wishes.]”

It wasn’t long until swift digits removed the more stubborn clothing to puddle at their feet. (The pair had undressed each other more times than they could count.) Soft gasps and moans filled the air as Hien left a blazing trail of kisses down her navel toward her slick center. Silva slapped a small hand over her mouth to muffle her cries when she felt his blunt teeth dig into the meat of a thigh one, two, three times as he raised her leg to rest over his shoulder, soothing each scarlet bruise he left behind with his tongue.

“[So sweet,]” he whispered against her skin, his gaze never leaving her as he edged closer to her core. “So sweet and beautiful and mine!]”

The slightly possessive growl had no right to make her heart race. It had no right to send sparks of levin throughout her body. “[Yes!”] she whined. The dancer weaved her fingers into his hair, gently coaxing him closer, hoping he would finally seal his mouth over her. “[Gods— Hien, please! I—]”

The moment his warm mouth and tongue found her dripping cunt and clit to toy with, she mewled loudly as a sharp crack of thunder sounded overhead. And then it started raining. Pouring, in fact. She couldn't believe her luck. Thankfully, the awning overhead would keep them and their clothes dry — mostly. Silva laughed at the coincidence, the bubbly sound turning into more pleasured cries when the Hyur eating her out chuckled against her sex.

“W-what’s so funny, my heart?” she gasped out. Her eyes rolled into the back of her head when he licked a long stripe up her cunt, the tip of his tongue flicking at the swollen bundle of nerves at the apex of her thighs.

“Now I have the perfect excuse to be late to my meeting,” he answered, mischievous dancing in his hazel eyes.

Seven fucking hells!

She laughed again, shaking her head at how silly her other lover was being. “Hien—” she started to playfully scold, only to be cut off by someone’s mouth slanting over hers in a deep, heated kiss.

What— When had Ricmorn joined them?

“And now I get to join in on making you into a writhing, moaning mess, Silv,” the tall Au Ra teased, playfully nipping at her bottom lip.

“Good gods! You two are—”

Insatiable. Maddening. Delirium given form.

Absolute perfection.

The best things to ever happen to—

She didn’t get to finish her thoughts as Hien went back to licking her drenched core, and her husband pulled her into another kiss, his hand finding a breast to play with. But Silva didn’t mind — not when she was with them and the three were stealing a special moment together.

There was no place she’d rather be than here, caught in the middle of a thundershower with her lovers.

[windsfavored]

though  the  wanderer  tries  to  keep  a  relatively  neutral  exterior,  the  prospect  of  bitter  chocolate  and  coffee  beans  sees  him  perking  up  a  touch  despite  his  best  efforts.  (  much  like  a  cat,  learning  to  recognize  the  word  for  a  favored  treat.  )  ❝  if  you  were  ACTUALLY  going  to  compensate  me  for  my  assistance  all  along,  you  should  have  said  so. ❞   the  wanderer  tells  him,  knowing  full  well  it  goes  against  aether's  nature  to  do  so  —  that  would  be  TOO  EASY.

he  takes  a  step  back  when  the  traveler  decides  to  follow  his  instructions  in  the  most  DRAMATIC  way  possible.  (  and  it's  a  good  thing  he  does;  he  barely  avoids  being  swatted  by  that  golden  mane.  )  ren  decides  to  respond  with  equivalent  maturity,  sticking  out  his  tongue  instead  of  applauding  the  display.  ❝  you're  a  mess. ❞   he  doesn't  hesitate  to  tell  him  —  with  the  same  flat  tone  one  might  use  when  describing  something  so  obvious,  even  making  the  observation  at  all  feels  like  a  condescending  chore.  grass  is  green,  water  is  wet,  the  sun  is  bright.  fortunately,  the  wanderer  is  nothing  if  not  PREPARED  —  pressing  a  hand  to  his  chest  and  withdrawing  a  brush  of  his  own.  something  simple.  something  that  won't  be  missed  on  the  off  chance  it  also  falls  victim  to  the  traveler's  tangled  mess  of  hair.  if  that  void  within  him  has  a  limit  to  its  carrying  capacity,  he  certainly  hasn't  found  it  yet  —  perhaps  he  should  make  it  a  point  to  start  packing  spares.

as  aether  sinks  down,  ren  quickly  begins  to  get  to  work.  before  he  can  even  consider  RE-BRAIDING  his  hair,  he  needs  to  brush  it  into  some  semblance  of  order.  he  takes  a  surprising  degree  of  care  to  ensure  the  process  is  as  painless  as  possible.  ❝  it's  been  perfectly ...  boring. ❞   the  wanderer  tells  him.  it's  difficult  to  tell  whether  he  means  it  as  a  compliment  or  complaint.  ❝  there's  still  a  few  handful  of  fatui  hanging  around  that  don't  seem  to  know  when  they  aren't  WELCOME ...  so  i've  been  taking  the  liberty  of  sending  them  home. ❞   by  force.  he  supposes  if  nothing  else,  it's  been  a  decent  source  of  stress  relief.  his  studies  aren't  too  much  of  an  ISSUE  —  although  ren  can  only  stand  staying  idle  for  so  long  before  he  craves  stimulation.  ❝  a  number  of  my  peers  at  the  akademiya  still  won't  stop  bothering  me ...  and  to  make  matters  worse,  they've  even  started  to  memorize  my  usual  hiding  places. ❞  although,  the  wanderer  supposes  if  that's  the  most  PRESSING  issue  he  has  to  contend  with  at  the  moment,  he's  actually  quite  fortunate.  (  describing  his  own  circumstances  in  such  terms  is  a  pretty  strange  change  of  pace.  )

❝  enough  about  that. ❞  enough  about  that.  ❝  tell  me  more  about  natlan.  information  is  pretty  hard  to  come  by. ❞  understandably;  its  people  aren't  exactly  prone  to  LEAVING.  ❝  considering  you're  involved ...  i  can  only  imagine  the  moment  you  set  foot  within  its  borders,  everything  fell  to  pieces. ❞  that  seems  to  be  something  of  a  theme.

IT IS A PRETTY TERRIBLE DEAL WHEN HE LEAVES HALF OF THE INFORMATION OUT. Really, he only meant to see if Ren can spare the time to help him at least untangle the mess of golden locks or if he has more important things to attend to. Besides, it's been a while since he's last been in Sumeru and he kind of misses the slower parts of his journey where everything isn't hectic and a battle against time. If things keep escalating like this, he dreads what he will be met with when he gets to Snezhnaya. Maybe it won't be that bad, the Tsaritsa rules the icy lands. Maybe it'll be worst leg of his journey. Maybe he shouldn't be thinking about it because he's getting terribly distracted. He's on a vacation of sorts.

That being said, this sort of banter brings an amused snort out of him. Hand on chest, Aether doesn't miss a beat when it comes to being dramatic in return. ❝ You mean to say that getting to play with my hair and the bag of dark chocolate-covered espresso beans I have in my bag is 'nothing'? You wound me, Ren, truly. ❞ is this considered bribing now? Not that it matters when the deal has already been accepted since before he even finished talking, but it's a curious thought to entertain. Can Ren even be bribed? He certainly has a vested interest in anything that has to do with weapons as well as anything bitter, but especially tea.

Because the Traveller wouldn't be himself without being a gremlin, instead of just turning around as instructed, he does a pirouette, ending it with a smile and a short bow. In hindsight, not his brightest idea when he has to drag all of his unbraided hair around with him. It's a miracle he managed to do all of that without tripping over his own feet or without hitting the wanderer in the face with his hair. But he's done it successfully! Probably much to the other's annoyance who just told him to turn around and sit still.

❝ Weeeeeeeeeeeell, I have a very funny story about those items. ❞ pause for dramatic effect ❝ They broke. The brush's teeth snapped when I tried to use it before coming over. The hair tie was already practically falling apart so I'm honestly quite surprised it lasted as long as it did. ❞ he'd not be surprised if those broken teeth were still stuck in his hair.

A hum rumbles in the back of his throat as he settles down properly; ❝ All my hair-related woes aside, how have things been here? It looks like things have more or less fallen into place. It's quite honestly a nice change from my trip to Natlan. ❞ he's still trying to wrap his head around what happened while he was there. Alright, he can get behind the fact that they are used to being brought back by the oath, but the fact that even children are participating in tournaments to get picked to fight the Abyss itself? How are any of them okay with that?

[totallynottinsel]

Decided to paint over my press on nails but make them cool with venti colors 💅

[amywritesthings]

CHAPTER 14: WRECKED

The POINT A TO POINT B series.

gif credit: @ themandaloriandaily

Pairing: Din Djarin x Female Reader ( Din x You )

Summary: Knocked unconscious by an ill-timed bomb, you awake to the aftermath of the freighter mission. It’s time to move forward, to find Point B, and continue your escape with Din.

Warnings: 18+ NO MINORS / Mentions of injury, Flashbacks, Aggressively Protective!Din, Bacta mentions, Bo-Katan being Bo-Katan, Helmetless!Din, Blindfolds, Themes of Sensuality

Word Count: 4K

A/N: ...it’s been a while, huh? The three-month hiatus is over! Thank you for your support in my absence, friends. As always, reblogs & comments are adored and appreciated.

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PREVIEW:

“Then explain why one of your clan found her in the ship, unconscious?” He spits the word ‘clan’ with immense vitriol and distrust.

“Because, at some point, she went into the freighter on her own volition,” Bo-Katan reasons with a growl. “I cannot anticipate what your partner will or will not do when she is alone. In this case, she felt the need to leave her post.”

Mando stands an impossible step closer. Bo-Katan doesn’t move away.

“Speak ill of her again. See what happens.”

“Is that a threat, Mando?”

His nickname is sung with mockery.

POINT A TO POINT B

CHAPTER 14: WRECKED

-

Yavin 4 is beautiful after a storm. 

The scent of grass after a passage of rain soothes the anxiety clinging tight to your chest. Birds sing in the distance while the insects buzz, creating a white noise blanket. Despite everything that surrounds this woodland planet, there is peace — maybe not for long, but it lives. 

(A peace you have tried time and time again not to hold onto with an ironclad fist. Squeeze too tight and the earth will shake. These people don't need your avalanche.)

While most of Rebel volunteers work tirelessly under protective slabs of concrete, sheltering them from any impending attacks from above, you go against better wishes to remain in the forest. Here, where you can push the dirt around with your boot and see it roll effortlessly like the clouds in the sky.

Alive. The world is alive and well and beautiful.

“It’s my fault.”

You know she's there watching, waiting, for you to speak first. The Commander has yet to leave your side and with good reason — rumors circle about allegiances in the night, in the dark. Whether or not the other rebels believe your story is up to her trust and her trust in you alone.

Craning your attention from the pebbles of dirt, you angle towards the patient Commander. Her hands are clasped together, body adorned with a brilliant forest green jumpsuit.

“Your Highness,” the woman murmurs, her smile small yet inviting. “You’ve only just arrived. You’re allowed a moment’s rest.”

“As lovely an idea as rest is, Commander, I cannot,” you murmur absently, shifting your gaze to observe a verbal argument just beyond her shoulder. At the mouth of a safe zone building, two pilots hover heatedly around one of the circular holo-grids to debate the images below their chests. “Not when I suspect he’s only a few days behind us.”

You don’t need to hear the conversation to know why both pilots are so passionate: the destruction of the second Death Star is smaller than a one in a million shot.

Everyone’s fearful the plan won’t work, and they have every right to be: the first only went up in flames because of sheer luck, a bout of lightning that rarely strikes twice.

The Empire is falling, that much is true. Yet it’s the lengths in which the enemy will go to keep themselves on life support that cause such distress and worry throughout the galaxy. 

(Distress and worry you wear on your own sleeve, here, as you clutch the possibility of ruining their final Hail Mary — and the possibility of failure, should Moff Gideon find you first.)

“I probably should have kept running,” you continue. “Kept people out of this mess.”

“You knew you could trust us,” the Commander beside you sighs, raising her arms to cross over her chest. She leans back against a metal barrier, waiting expectantly for the argument in return.

You scowl at her confidence, ignoring how the cut on your cheek burns with it. “That doesn’t mean everyone at this base happily signed over a death wish.”

“No, but safety is not what we signed up for, Princess.” 

You shoot her a look, and the woman laughs. 

“Well, it’s true, isn’t it? You could have stayed in the ivory towers of Coruscant, yet you chose to be here with us. If anything, it’s you that signed a death wish, clear as day and on a dotted line.”

“It’s not the same.”

“Is it not? Your injuries alone have shown the others what kind of sacrifice they have to be willing to make to be here.”

You hate being spoken of like you’re a martyr.

(It was the right thing to do.)

Your entire body still aches, but you know his aches more. The knowledge that you caused Moff Gideon equal amounts of suffering and pain is good enough for you. This plan was never one of the winning plays the Rebel alliance had on hand, but it was the only viable solution left. While Imperial numbers dwindle, so do yours; volunteerism has become the only way anything gets done under the talons of the Empire, and there is one good card left to play on the sabacc table.

Winning by the skin of their teeth — it’s something you and the Rebels have in common.

Once you heal enough to fly on your own, you’ll depart from this base to the next.

Constantly moving until the final Imperial flag falls.

“He’ll come after us,” you frown, eyes lingering on hers before you turn your attention back to the pilots — they now hold one another in a tight embrace. The softness — the desperation — makes your stomach churn. “All of us.”

“And we’re prepared for it, should the fight come.”

You don’t have the energy to tell her: there is no should.

Moff Gideon would come, whether you want him to or not.

The longer you bounce from place to place, the more scorched earth will linger in your absence.

If you can find your way to Point B without detection, if you can hold on for a little while longer, then this will have been worth it.

(Without this power, the Empire will weaken and die off altogether. You’re sure of it.)

Crouching with control to the ground, you reach lower to place a bare palm against the loosened dirt at your boot. The tickle of the particles offers you in a heavy reminder: you still breathe with full lungs, so you will continue on.

After floating through space on an Imperial ship week, months, it's so easy to forget the little things: how much you miss the smell of grass on the fresh dew of morning, or the warmth of an awakening sun as it rises.

Your fingernails dig down, down, until earth lives in the universe of your fist.

Remember this. 

You are eager to photograph every inch of this place by sheer memory. The laughing foot soldiers pouring their mourning stew into their bowls. The families that play here, sing here, making the most of what remains of their once peaceful lives with the hope of starting anew.

(Rebellions were — and always have been — built on hope.)

You squeeze hard and suck in a sharp breath, closing your eyes.

. . . . . . . . .

“What did you do to her?”

It isn’t your voice.

The sound is filtered, as if grating against the edges of a helmet.

When you open your eyes, you’re no longer in the middle of a serene field base on Yavin 4, but somewhere much worse: the tumultuous docks of Trask, where a squared-shouldered Mando is nose-to-nose with an equally tense (and helmetless) Bo-Katan Kryze. 

His visor points down to her bare face, gloved hand at the ready on his hip. Both Koska Reeves and Axe Woves hold their weapons steady, pointed at the Mandalorian in an elongated triangle and placing him dead center.

“What did you do to her?” The modulated voice demands again, deeper in its bark.

“Do to her?” 

Bo-Katan. Her voice is no longer laced with nonchalance, but with surprise. Anger.

“Koska saved her.”

Koska?

Who did Koska save?

While everything beyond the dock continues to slosh back and forth like a trawler on the choppy sea, you explore the tingling sensation of your limbs reanimating from sore, dulled pain.

“You said she was going to be out of harm’s way.”

“And she was.”

“Then explain why one of your clan found her in the ship, unconscious?”

He spits the word ‘clan’ with immense vitriol and distrust.

“Because, at some point, she went into the freighter on her own volition,” Bo-Katan reasons with a growl. “I cannot anticipate what your partner will or will not do when she is alone. In this case, she felt the need to leave her post.”

Mando stands an impossible step closer. Bo-Katan doesn’t move away.

“Speak ill of her again. See what happens.”

“Is that a threat, Mando?”  

His nickname is sung with mockery.

“It never stopped being one since the moment you slandered my clan,” Mando snarls, armor clinking as his finger raises to point in her face. “Without us, you wouldn’t have survived the first wave. You should be grateful she did you a favor. With honor, she—”

“Mando?”

Finally, you discover your voice. It’s hoarse and dry, but working. Managing.

Like lead, the hand once pushing into Bo-Katan’s face drops to his side as his helmet whips at attention, visor directly pointed at you.

Without another word he pushes past the helmetless leader, stalking with urgency to the other side of the dock.

“—dank farrik.”

His armor clangs as he drops to his knees, glove gingerly cupping the side of your face. You melt into the heavy feel of his palm — strong, familiar, a chance for peace — and rest your cheek with ease. 

“Hey, it’s me. I’m here.”

“Hey,” you mumble in return, shifting against the pole propping your seated torso from slouching. You try to offer a smile, but your face aches.

Everything hurts.

“Don’t move,” he orders, but something sounds off about his voice. It’s small against the modulator, whispered, while his visor searches the perimeter of your head in a frenzied, clockwise circle. “You’re hurt. I’m going to get you out of here.”

The realization sinks deep.

He’s terrified.

“It was…” You wince at the sandpaper-like texture of your throat and swallow heavily to coat it with saliva. “...my fault.”

“What?” You feel Mando’s gloves tenderly pressing down your arms to halt any any sudden movements. You fight to keep your eyes on him. “Nothing was your fault.”

“What Bo-Katan said is true,” you admit. “I went... into the ship.”

“She was under a pile of rubble beside an Imp and a Trooper,” Koska supplies, taking a protective stance in front of Bo-Katan in the absence of the bounty hunter. “The Imp was impaled. Trooper under the rubble. I wasn’t able to do a thorough check, but it looked like she crawled.”

“Because the ceiling... caved in,” you add, keeping your attention on his visor.

Surely he must know you heard all of it — the argument with Bo-Katan about the plan, the sudden influx of Stormtroopers, the way he said he would handle the flurry of fresh Troopers.

Then an explosion appeared.

Mando’s fingers smooth over your bicep, though whether it’s because he’s calming you down or stalling in admitting he was the cause of the damage above, you cannot tell.

“Bounty hunter: do you carry bacta spray on your ship?” 

Axe gently weaves into the conversation, peering around his leader to speak directly to Mando.

“If I were you, I would transport her back there as soon as you’re able, before her wounds cause any lasting damage. I have a spare canister on me, should you need it.”

He walks forward, pace deliberate and strong before extending a long arm towards Mando. The bounty hunter hesitates, frozen in place before he regards Axe above him. Their gloves connect, and he slips the canister from the palm of the other Mandalorian and secures the item to his belt.

Mando does not thank him for his generosity. 

“As agreed, I will help you seek your Jedi, as you have more than earned it,” Bo-Katan says in her feigned diplomatic tone, abandoning the heat Mando released. You slump to look at her over the bounty hunter's shoulder. His hand cinches tighter around your arm, protective.

(Feral.)

Her dark crimson brows raise in a pause.

“Take your ship to the forest planet of Corvus. There you will find a Jedi of the name Ahsoka Tano within the city of Corvus. Tell her Bo-Katan Kryze sent you.” 

In an effort of belated good faith, Bo-Katan steps back once, twice, three times to give you both room. Her chin bows deep.

“Now go care for your partner. Depart from Trask safely.”

In the haze, you see her gaze connect with yours.

“And thank you, for everything you did for us.”

Wordlessly, Mando rises to his knees and takes to a crouch, preparing to sweep his arms under your knees and back. He cautiously places your limp arm around his shoulders for support, but there is no need for it — he’s strong enough without your help to do the heavy lifting for you both.

“Please tell me… we’re walking,” you weakly joke into his breastplate. A noise of discomfort rushes past your lungs as he rises to his feet, anchoring you in towards his chest.

“Flying will be the fastest way,” he murmurs over the crown of your head. “Hold onto me, okay?”

“I might — pass out.”

“Don’t fall asleep, do you hear me? Stay with me.”

You can’t pin-point if his voice cracks or if it’s his modulator glitching.

The jetpack ignites.

. . . . . . . . .

You aren’t sure when you fell unconscious — somewhere between the feeling of being airborne and the exhaustion of today taking over — but when you come to, the universe is black.

With a brilliant gasp of air, your body lurches in the darkness to fight. Yet the heaviness of restraints aren’t there. Your forehead is ablaze with sweat. The pain is dulled, a lulling throb in the back of your skull. Beneath you is soft and warm, not hard and cold.

“Princess?”

The question tickles your left ear. You turn to nothingness to find the gruff voice, taking into a frenzied scramble to get away from it in a fight or flight response.

“Stay away from me—”

“Wait.”

The deep baritone cautions the air surrounding you like velvet. Soft warmth engulfs your flailing arm, pressing your bicep into your torso with profound care. A squeak of surprise catches in your throat.

“It’s okay. You’re okay.”

Mando.

It is Mando's voice.

Searching for him in the nothingness with the tip of your nose as your guide, you tremble at the absence of a modulator.

There is no vocoder buzz. No filtered disconnect.

“Don’t move so much," he adds, filling the space with his naked voice. "The bacta spray’s still working.”

“Your—”

“—safe.”

“—helmet,” you finish in a croak, squeezing your eyes shut. “Why — where is your helmet?”

Your free hand roams in a fuss to cover your face, but it connects with a sliver of fabric — a thick barrier between the bridge of your nose and the skin of your fingers.

The emergency blindfold.

“I… took precaution in case you stirred earlier than expected,” he adds with unease. “You sustained a fair amount of injuries. I needed to be careful.” 

He takes a beat, and you feel rough fingertips curl around yours by your nose. He tugs once, pulling your hand with his from the surface of the blindfold to lower to the sheet of the cot. His thumb slides along your skin in an attempt to soothe away any disorienting fear.

“You should be healed enough, now.”

You nod once, shoulders dropping a fraction. "...how long was I out?”

“Long enough to scare me,” he admits softly. “Four days, give or take some hours.”

Four entire days since the freighter.

Kriff.

“The kid?” you question abruptly, belated worry rushing to the forefront of your tired mind.

“Kid’s fine.”

“And Bo-Katan?”

“Gone to do as she pleases with her endless supply of weaponry,” Mando answers with a sour note on his tongue. “Along with her alleged clan.”

“And we’re on the Crest away from Trask?”

“Far away from Trask,” he confirms. “It’s only us.”

Your shoulders slouch with relief. “Thank the Maker.”

A huff of an ironic laugh leaves your lips as you open your eyes. Nothing. You see absolutely nothing, but you hear everything: the beauty of his naked voice, the freedom of his breath as he inhales and exhales. You didn’t realize how much you missed the simplicity of it.

He continues to hold your hand, but the air of the room shifts.

“What happened back on Trask can't happen again.” The softness in his voice becomes molten, solidifying to steel. “From now on, you stay on the ship until we arrive on Coruscant.”

Your chin tilts to find his voice, voice stronger in your blurt.

“What?”

“The only way this works is if you stick with the kid. I’ve had plenty of time to think about this.”

“No, there is no way I’m staying—” 

When you start to vigorously shake your head, you’re slammed with stars behind your eyes. Mando’s grip tightens against your fingers in fright, while his free hand rests at your knee.

“Careful, cyar’ika, don’t move too fast.”

“I am fine,” you demand louder. “I will be fine.”

“You went inside the freighter.”

“But—”

“You promised me you would run the other way.”

A wave of nausea passes through your body from head to toe.

“The rest of the troopers were moving indoors,” you reason slowly, ignoring the waver in your voice. “I would have blown my cover if I stayed outside alone.”

“Your only responsibility was to run if things went wrong.”

“And I’m telling you, I would have been caught,” you argue, sitting up straighter. His palm is quick to steady the middle of your back. “Then Bo-Katan changed the deal—”

“You promised me,” Mando interrupts, sharper.

“And what about you?” you counter swiftly with your own bite.

“What about me?”

“Was I supposed to… ignore the comms completely when you broke our deal?”

You can hear him shift against the edge of the cot. “Our deal?”

“You and your promise to keep me safe. You say you don’t trust Bo-Katan and her clan, fine, but you were still willing to put yourself at risk. You’ll handle their problems for them, right? Even if they change the deal on a dime?”

He doesn’t speak, causing a huff of irony to pass your lips. 

“Yeah, I heard the little savior play on the comms. That’s why I went running. To come after you.”

A heavy sigh exits his mouth as he shifts in front of you. “I was fine.”

“And if you weren’t?” you challenge, unable to halt the crack in your question. “This is twice now. Twice where you could have died and I would have heard or seen it. First the ship at sea, and now this job with Bo-Katan. Am I supposed to be okay with almost losing you? Was I meant to fly the Razor Crest to Coruscant on my own?”

His voice nears in a sorrowful whisper. “Princess, you don’t understand. You could have died. ” 

“You could have, too,” you counter without missing a beat. “But Koska got me out of there.”

“And if she hadn’t?”

“Then I knew you would have, because I trust you.”

You reply with such conviction that the ship grows silent. All that surrounds you is the small sounds of the distant cockpit and the hum of the engine.

Mando pauses under your grip, marinating on the sentiment before replying with his own three words that break your heart:

“But I didn’t.”

Before you can hang on too tight, the mattress shifts and his hand disappears from yours.

You chase the touch despite yourself. All you connect with is air.

“I failed you, cyar’ika, and I am sorry,” he begins, voice further away. “I allowed my anger to get the best of me. In the moment, I could only see what it took to protect my clan and their honor. To show what it meant to be of the Watch, but I was supposed to protect the kid. I was supposed to protect you.”

Guilty seeps into the few beats of silence he holds onto after speaking.

“Yeah?” you tell him, recognizing the tremble in your own voice. “Well, not if I protect you first.”

Mando says nothing. You drop your palm to the mattress, searching for him in a semi-circle around you. He shifts further away once more, but you manage to clip your fingertips against the edge of his belt to stop him.

"Stop."

By some miracle, he does. Mando stays put, waiting for your command.

"I’m not letting you out of my sight — figuratively, obviously, since I can’t see you.”

Finally, finally the tense air breaks with his own chuckle of disbelief. He mumbles something foreign under his breath, and the mattress creaks at your side.

He’s back.

“Princess…”

“Bo-Katan was cruel,” you start, cutting him off before he can do the same to you. “Mandalorians or not, what her clan did to you? They ought to be ashamed of themselves. We were willing to help, yet she changed the deal and threw your code in your face just to see what makes you tick. I understand why you did what you did on the freighter, why you were willing to sacrifice yourself, because you’re always willing to help."

He says nothing, but you can hear the mattress beneath you shift. He's sliding closer. You continue.

"You’re a good person, Mando. You're good to the kid, you're good to me. Hell, you're good to strangers who never deserved your goodness. And I know I’m not a Mandalorian, but—”

“—but you have the heart of one.”

Mando cuts you off, taking your hand into his, but that isn’t what makes your breath disappear.

Something warm glides against the inside of your wrist. Soft and featherlike, barely a touch, before there is pressure, some wetness, and the fire blossoms low in your belly when you realize:

Somewhere you cannot see, Mando is bent over and kissing your wrist.

Kissing.

With his own naked lips.

You dare not move. 

You dare not speak. 

The Mandalorian has your undivided attention.

“You are right," he murmurs against the delicate skin. "You were not born on Mandalore, like me. You may not possess our armor, you may not have sworn to a code, but that does not mean you do not have the heart of a Mandalorian.”

He breathes for you — a gentle puff against your forearm. 

“In the time I have known you, I have learned you are strong,” he continues with conviction. “You own a resilience unlike anyone I have ever met. You make difficult choices and do so with honor.” 

His lips climb higher, dragging along your arm in worship. Goosebumps form in his wake. 

“When my faith — when my oath — was tested on that moon, you chose to negotiate with peace instead of violence for the good of the Child. You asked to work with Kryze and her clan and secured the location of the Jedi when I could not."

He lingers, kissing the slope of your bicep.

"Even when your life could be in danger, you risked it. Even when I didn’t deserve it, you fought.”

He presses another kiss at your bare shoulder.

“You have always chosen to fight.” 

Within a pause he rises, breath shivering along your chin.

“For the kid. For me. And I would...” 

His words trail off, voice crackling. It repairs, returning with conviction.

“I would scorch the galaxy for you.”

His bare palms slide along either side of your face, cradling your head as though nothing more precious has ever graced his calloused, tired hands.

Your lips part wordlessly, voice lost in his confession, but eventually sigh as the pad of his left thumb grazes your cheekbone with timid admiration.

“Mando—” 

“Din.” 

The word is so small you almost don’t hear it.

The smooth plane of his bare forehead, warm and alive, drops ever so gently against yours. Over the fabric of the blindfold, the tip of his nose nudges yours. You hyper focus on something brushing your lips — facial hair, you're sure of it — before the universe stands still.

Because he murmurs the next four words like an oath to a creed:

“My name is Din.”