#I JUST FINISHED THE SHOW IM IN TEARS THIS IS NOT IT
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finished reading the emerald angst, now im destroyed. let's destroy me further. now what would emerald do if he meets another multiverse reader? will he approach? or just admire from afar?
˖⁺. ﹙ sorcerer husband x gn reader. ﹚ .𖹭 ݁
. . . i miss you so much and you don't know me !! 🍒 : sorcerer ˖ corrupt god character﹙ verse 164 alessio. ﹚
alessio mourns the loss of his past lover, only to find another version of them. In a place he'd never thought he would find them. cw : his lover / reader is dead, alessio disguises as a different alessio to not blow cover
Thoughts were streaming through his head all at once.
Should he steal you away? Rip out of the shell he pretended to be and show his true self. Take you with him home— No.
‘Just let them pick out the necklace before you start acting rash. . .’ He thought to himself
Here you were. Standing inside of a vintage shop. Your arms hugged around his as you decide which necklace you’d like for him to buy you,
And yet. . . It wasn’t really you.
Wasn’t it pathetic? To go and find a different variant of you, in disguise of one of his own variants.
Oh and you took long to find, one of the rare variants to see around the multiverse it’d seem. He almost began losing hope in seeing if there were anymore of you around. To his fortune, ‘you’ were still here somewhere.
It was nothing he had not done before though, disguising himself as one of his own variations to get to one of the Rishens and have some time with them. . . You would be no different. He swore to himself anything would do, if he was able to see you again.
And where did he find himself?
The damned cosmos of 1311, in the disguise of the one variant he despised the most, excluding 781.
Alas, this was one of the only verses he could find a variant of yours.
The rest? They were all dead already from what he had gathered.
A discovery which upset him deeply. Tugging away at the guilt he felt already at the loss of you.
“Hermoso,” You chirp. Smiling up at the man you thought to be your Alessio.
You must be a little dense here. That, or you are very oblivious to the fact that the man you look up at doesn’t even have magenta eyes that match the darkness of the abyss about the sclera.
He finds it endearing, amusing almost. Perhaps you simply assume he is wearing contacts.
“Yes, amore?” Emerald hues soften with a tinge of melancholy as they get lost in your eyes. The twist of regret suffocating him as it rushes through his veins.
He dips down and lands a kiss upon your lips, before pulling away. Looking down at the necklace you’ve picked out.
“This one reminds me of you— I want this one.” You hum quietly, brushing a soft thumb across his cheek. Your lips thinning as you ready yourself to say more.
“I know you’re not him.” The soft murmur pulls at the edge of his eyebrow, twitching in confusion.
Oh.
He was the dense one. Wasn’t he?
“Forgive me.” He sighs against your forehead and presses a kiss to it. He moves not even one inch away, and he is surprised you do not.
“It’s okay.” You croak quietly. Arms wrapped around him, a hand rubbing smooth circles on his back to soothe him. “Why don’t you just stay here for a little while?”
Tears well up in his eyes, as his arms move to wrap around you tightly.
“Enjoy the quiet. . .” You whisper, and hum.
#﹙ cupcake rush. ﹚: alessio 164 𖹭 ݁#monster boyfriend#teratophillia#monster angst#terato#monster fucker#monster x reader#sorcerer x reader#god x reader#oc x reader#monster oc#x reader#reader insert#original character x reader#alessio 164#asterism
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"Im not even sure anymore if we get to choose who our friends are" There is a part of me that resents you for making me a worse person than i want to be but i am inexplicably uncontrollably drawn to you. You make me a worse person which is the last thing i want yet i want you in every way. If i could leave i would. Maybe i can but i dont want to. I have fun with you. You challenge me and you captivate me and you push me and pull and run circles around me and it makes me feel like a younger man. For the price of being a worse person i get to feel truly, wholly alive. You are the blood that runs through my veins; vital, inseparable. I was reborn when i met you and you are the womb that haunts me. You are the one person on planet earth who knows me. I wish i could leave, move on and be the man im supposed to be but my heart is tied to yours in a gordian knot. There is a part of my soul that rests in yours, magnetic. For as long as i love you i cannot be better than i am. But maybe thats something i can learn to live with. Gregory House-- I think you're worth it.
#house md#james wilson#gregory house#hilson#johan being crazy about yaoi md#johan's mindpalace#Im crazy#like im tearing up#this scene is so romantic it genuinely makes me nauseous#the lowlight setting the lingering stares the soft little smile a dam thats finally broken#I need a 12 gauge bullet in the thigh#Please watch this scene screencaps do not do it near enough justice#do you know whats so genuinely actually sickening#its been months since i finished house md#and i have not watched a single show that has managed to fill even a quarter of the gaping bleeding hilson shaped hole in my heart#shows that have actual gay people actual representation and not a single one has managed to alter my brain chemistry the way hilson has#since day 1 episode 1#Like its actually nauseating a little its so over for me for the rest of my life#Like im actually never recovering#people say “they dont make xyz like they used to haha” But Guys they Genuinely dont#Im going through withdrawls#I need my yaoi cocaine so bad but my plug died 12 years ago and i cant fucking Move#House md capital of fatphobia homophobia transphobia early 2000s edgy humour outshining modern shows with actual rep like im sick#Its not even because i want to like i feel like there are worms in my brain. I feel like ratatoullie if the rat was evil#This is not what the stonewall riots were for#I feel like so nausous why couldnt i be crazy about an actual gay pairing like a normal gay person. Im gonna throwup#Why couldnt i like music and girls#Its not even that house md is objectively logically better than these shows like no. Im just crazy#Im so sick they make me so sick i feel like there are worms in my head. My head#Dont know when i will ever be onorlmal again. Sorr
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……help
#lovely runner#i just finished it..#………why why did i finish it so quickly#WHY WAS THIS SHOW ACYUALLY PERFECT HOLY SHIT IM LEGIT TEARING UP CAUSE ITS OVER#AAAAAHHHHHHHHGGH
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AP SCORES RELEASED IN A COUPLE DAYS IM SCARED
#vammieposts#ap tests#im pretty sure i failed ap lang seeing as I DIDNT FINISH ONE OF THE ESSAYS HOLY SHIT#but ap world was kinda easy#but i cant be too optimistic or else ill be disappointed if i fail#if i believe i failed noth tests and i succeeded at one then HUZZAH ill feel really proud#thats my secret >:))#also anyways ap test scores dont relaly mayter#like if you succeed you save money and dont have to take that class in college#but youll provably learn more int he college class tbh#and just the fact that you TOOK a difficult class looks great to college and makes you feel VERY POWERFUL#a low score on a 3 hour long endurance test doesnt show your knowledge of a subject yk#it just shows how good you are at school and not melting your brain out your tear ducts and ears
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Im barely starting season 2 of house but why is everyone saying that house doesn't visit the patient? "Visiting a patient, thats unlike you" Literally every ep he goes to see the patient like CMON he is giving every patient like 100 psychic damage as soon as he walks in the room how are you not noticing this
#yeah idk why im upset either#i just like to rant yknow#just finished ep 2 and im still losing my mind that they killed her#BUT NO THEY DIDNT#AND CHASE?????#SHE'S NINE!!!!!!!!#man what in the fuck IS THIS SHOW#imma still watch it tho#yall are gonna need a magnet stronger than an mri machine to tear me away from wilsons fine ass 😫#cause his butt just PULLS me in i cant explain it#house md#hatecrimes md
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the natsuyuu manga is so funny the volume will be like "natsume grapples with his desire for unconditional love versus his fear of burdening those around him, knowing the more he opens his heart to the people he cares about the more he stands to lose if something goes wrong; these people are the warmest he's ever known and he's the happiest he's ever been and that scares him because he can't shake the feeling that it's fleeting and fragile and could all disappear at any moment, so all he can do is fight to protect everything he loves and hope one day he'll deserve the precious happiness he's been given here"
and then the blurb on the back is like "natsume climbs up into the attic to look for some books, but... uh oh... is that a... g-g-g-ghost??!? things are about to get freaky deaky in here if he doesn't do something... quick!!! will natsume be able to handle it before the clock strikes thirteen, or will he become... gulp... the ghost's next meal?!?"
#always gives me a little heehee chuckle after the Emotional Damage inflicted by the story#just finished vol 11 uuuuuuu........ the one where he goes to visit his parents' old home uuuuuuuu.........#it was the first episode to make me cry when i watched the anime but i didn't this time#i did tear up at the end tho when natsume asks to retake the family photo with sensei in it this time 😭😭😭#like stopppppppppp im gonna die#retag later#ny blogging#moment was ruined when i turned the page and fuckin Matoba was there like WHO ASKED U KGJSLDKSDKGN#(lil mini drawings after every chapter. the theme this vol was characters when they were younger and. matoba & natori were up next ig)#it's fine there were already other parts of the manga that made me cry that didn't in the anime#like when the little fox travels all the way out to see natsume again and finds him having fun w his friends#and loses courage and walks away thinking ''i guess the one who was really lonely this whole time was me...''#AND THEN natsume finds them anyway and asks for directions to their forest so he can come visit next time LIKE COME ONNNNNNNNN#the natsume observation logs are everything 2 me u hear me EVERYTHING#main character from other characters' pov is ALWAYS 1000/10 good shit 👌👌👌#i wanna get to nishimura and kitamoto's chapters again rhrngnghrnggh vibrates in chair#cant be doing this again Except That I Can#where are my boys. SHOW ME THE BOYS
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it just set in for me that i start community college this upcoming monday literally less than a week from now and i want. to throw up
#its a combo of omg holy shit my life is progressing im healing im reforming into a human being im a real boy#and ✨academic trauma✨ reflecting on my life now vs the last 6 years and the last time i was in school#and im not handling it well. maybe i am a little cuz so far i have held back the tears but i dont think thats an acceptable bar#the tears are certainly there. and i most certainly feel like losing the little ive eaten today#ive also started seriously considering if it would be more or less strategic to skip cr today in favor of playing smth with a friend#i was like dang its important to take the time when we're both free#but also cr uploads on mondays and ive reignited my interest in watching live and i dont trust myself to fight the vod impulse on that day#i want things to be different and i want to do good and i want to feel all the progress ive made in action#so if she is available today im gonna be honest and say sorry i cant play this thing we were both excited about bc ive got a 4 hour#nerd show tonight. and im gonna feel really shitty about it.#feels shitty and stupid to choose a piece of media thatll always be there over quality friend time#but i know if i dont get this shit thats always gonna be there over with NOW itll be really hard to put off later#hhhhhhh#im a mess dude ima finish the video i was watching before i started having a crisis and then im gonna take a bath#and then maybe stardew valley. it is the game for when life is falling apart and i just deep cleaned my desk itll be so nice
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I did it, I actually did it
I can’t believe I finished the series
It always comes as a shock to me once Ive actually finished an entire series. Like everything kind of like sets in and then Im like wow, I just finished it, it’s over.
#i don’t want it to be over#it’s such an amazing story i#i don’t know what to say#i can’t believe irs over#like the empty kind of feeling when you finish something#im still going to watch the donghua and ty e live action#but like I still can’t believe i’ve finished the books#they were wonderful#the characters were amazing#the dynamics between them all were great#the overall vibe or like feeling the story has is amazing#it was just all so good#i don’t know what im going to do now#this is what i spent so much time doing#i have all the other stories and shows I put on pause for mdzs that im going to go back to#but like wow#I’ve finished all mxtx’s series#I’ve read them all#i still can’t believe that#grand master of demonic cultivation#mdzs#its time to destroy myself by listening to character and ship specific playlists on spotify#the people who make playlists almost always hit just right and create masterpieces of playlists that have actually reduced me to tears#on multiple occasions that is
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LIN MANUEL MIRANDA IS A RECURRING CHARACTER ON HOUSE MD???
#i hate this fucking show its everything to me its nothing to me im surprised it still shocks me#what the freak... not even hating on lmm hes everywhere i havent gotten to his intro yet#fucking tiktok was making thirstrap edits or whtvr and he appeared i thought it was a trol i googled#i shed a tear its 6 am i haven't slept oh gee#ur telling me my boy my guy my brobro kutner dies and then i get lmm jumpscared#in bidens america#obama took my boy biden is torturing me with lin this is the liberal agenda save me donald trump#l speaks#shut up l#spooky liveblogs (kind of)#house md#just finished s5e11 i hope to god cuddy gets to have the girls baby#just finished my period im emotionally vulnerable i cant take it i want her to be happy i need it so bad
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Wait... Is Baruto a show where Baruto rebels against his absent father by thinking ninjas are bullshit and has to be pulled back to the "good" ninja side to defeat evil and the decline of the ninja way? Because if so, that is some bullshit. Burn it all down, Baruto. Fuck the ninja system.
#i havent finished shippuden yet but idk baruto was calling to me lol. i kno how shippuden ends so like whatever ill get there eventually#i just. with all fantasy media i tend to think the magical structure is bullshit and want someone to come tear it down#but with naruto its so fucking bad that the point of the show should be tearing it down#so if baruto is abt reviving the ninja way i might lose my mind lmao#me: i bet ill hate baruto. baruto: fuck ninjas. me: ok ok lets see where this goes#ive only watched like half an episode lol so i might b completely off#im just trying to resist the urge to contact my secret bastard cousin bc i just got 23 and me results back lol#unrelated#naruto ramblings#naruto#lol srry if u just started following me bc avatar content rip#boruto
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My friend are you okay (regarding Steven universe)
no <3
#slash l h#that show fucked me up big time!!!!!!#I've not been more deeply or profoundly impacted by media in a While !!!#grits teeth white knuckles fights back tears he is JUST like me fr#i started watching this show FOUR YEARS AGO!!! when i was fourteen (steven's age in the main series)#so it's like. he grew up with me a little? except i Just Now got the chance to finish the show and it's like#IT WAS WAITING FOR WHEN IT WOULD HIT FUCKING HARDEST#it's about LOVE and FAMILY and GROWTH and ACCEPTANCE IN ALL IT'S FORMS#and i hate that people have such fucked up ideas of what this show is bc of how shitty the fandom was!!!!!!#because it's a MASTERPIECE!!!!!!! but there's Idiots who'd call me dumb for thinking that#IT'S GOOD!!! IT'S A GOOD SHOW EVERYONE! IT'S BEAUTIFUL AND COMPASSIONATE AND GENUINELY HILARIOUS#and BEAUTIFUL AND CLEVER AND WELL WRITTEN. AND IT HURTS!!!!!!!!#and it's for FOURTEEN YEAR OLDS. AND ALSO FOR ME SPECIFICALLY#anyway. holy shit girl im So Sorry to do this essay here in the tags lmao you asked a fairly normal question akdkkaks#hope this answers it <3#ask nat#lasaraleen
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and just as the clock struck 12:17 the morning of september 1st i finished my gravity falls rewatch bawling my eyes out.
#despite this being a show that changed me to my core i don't think i've watched more than the occasional sock opera since 2018#i would say see you next summer but judging by the amount of tears rn i don't think i'm gonna be able to wait that long to watch it again#i think i pushed it away for so long bc growing up has always been a touchy subject for me. change and life and all that#but now i'm turning 22 in a couple weeks and. im here. i did it.#i don't know. it's late and my feelings on life and the passage of time are complicated#i'm just glad this show got to be a part of it. back when i was the mystery twins age and now that im gonna to be as old as soos#and as much as i pushed it away i never REALLY stopped thinking about it. i quote it all the time#and even without that. as scary as my teenage years and growing up as a whole still were i think those kids made it just a little more ok#despite the fact that i turned 13 the year the world went to shit (2016). there's only so much a tv show can do to help you with that#i don't know where this post was going. anyways gravity falls means a lot to me alex hirsch i owe you my life#sassy speaks#gf#also that timestamp is when i finished the show i've been sitting here being sappy for almost 20 mins. IT MEANS A LOT TO ME OK-
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im sad so heres toru fuckin u after an argument.
the bed creaks under your shared weight. it only merges with the sounds of your breathy moans and skin connecting together. your legs are spread around his waist, his slutty waist that your legs easily wrap around. your fairly squared nails drag up and down his back, leaving marks that you know is going to show up angrily tomorrow.
his face rests in the crook of your neck. he’s breathing heavily onto your skin while he fucks all of his bottled up emotions into your pussy. his tongue occasionally darts out of his mouth to lick at your neck and his lips follow suit, sucking on the spot he licked. there are tears brimming in both you and his eyes. you almost broke up with him. he almost broke up with you. almost, almost, almost.
he pushes and pulls away his hips rhythmically, never losing the pattern. his dick fills your pussy up just right, scratching that spot you will probably never be able to reach alone with just your fingers. he fucks you like a man, like he means it.
“right there—right there!” you gasp. your eyes are rolling back and your legs are shaking already. maybe the adrenaline from the argument has you finishing so quickly. you stop dragging your hands and instead press the tips of your fingernails into his skin.
satoru hisses out a curse word. your nails digging into his skin accompanied with your pussy clenching tightly around his dick has his own eyes rolling back. needy whimpers escape from his throat as his pace speeds up and he thrusts desperately into you. you’re whining and crying under him from overstimulation but he can’t stop. not when he’s so close. not when you tested his patience so disobediently just some minutes ago.
your pussy is creaming and getting all over his dick and the sheets. you’re making such a mess around him and he loves it. no matter how much you say you hate him, your pussy will forever say otherwise.
suddenly, you’re trying to push his head up so that you could be face to face with your lover. “kiss. wan’ kiss, toru.” your voice so desperate and soft, it’s almost hypnotic.
he’s quickly raising his head and smashing his lips onto yours. the kiss is clashing as moans and curses slip out from the both of you. he slips his tongue inside your mouth, barely giving you any room to breathe. while he busies your mouth, his right hand searches for yours, when he finds it, he’s immediately intertwining his slender fingers with yours.
when he pulls his lips away from yours, a thin line of spit follows suit and quickly breaks away. satoru bites down on his lip as he focuses back on thrusting into your wetness. him looking at you low-lidded and a flush on his face has your pussy throbbing.
“i love you, baby.” he breathes out before catching your lips once again. instead of tongue kissing, he gives you a series of kisses that has your lips sizzling. your stomach clenches, and the feeling of butterflies floating around has you breathing heavy.
“i love you more.” you’re giving him that needy look that his his balls clenching and his back arching slightly as he realizes he’s about to cum.
“so fuckin’ p-perfect. ‘mma get my shit together.” he promises. it comes out rushed as he brings his face back to your neck to leave more marks. he begins promising and babbling sweet nothings as his orgasm crashes over him. “baby.” he repeats with a loud moan as his balls drain inside your pussy.
argument be dammed, there’s no way you would ever let him go and vice versa. you’re his just as much as he’s yours.
#prettiedup ♡#prettiedup’s jjk fics .ᐟ satoru#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru x reader#gojo smut#satoru x reader#satoru smut
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Help my sister is making fun of me for crying because of Sailor Moon
#for context ive never seen the show before#or knew anything about it#i went in blind#and we just finished the first series/season tonight#so it was *that* penultimate episode#look im veey easy to get tearing up#sailor moon
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𝐢𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 … you’ve never been eaten out and matt’s never tried…so firsts all around
ᥫ᭡ … you and matt had been hanging out in your room for the past hour. you had just gotten home and he decided to stay over for a bit.
you were watching a show that had a tiny sex scene in it.
“it cannot be that good.” your jaw was dropped as the actress was screaming.
matt laughed at your comment. “that guys ego is definitely high if he’s getting a reaction like that.
“yeah, like she’s practically screaming and shouting. although, who am i to judge. i wouldn’t know.” you shrugged. “but i mean if she’s screaming that loud at being eaten out, imagine how good the sex is.”
unfortunately that comment you made had matt fantasizing about how it would be to eat a girl out and it was odd because he saw you as the girl.
he was fidgeting with his shorts as he felt himself harden at his thoughts. he decided to try to ignore it until you asked him an interesting question.
“had a girl ever screamed like that when you had given her head? i’m curious.” you popped a popcorn in your mouth.
he hesitated. “u-uhh, i’ve never really…” he didn’t finish his sentence. you gulped.
“really?” you asked in shock. “sorry, i just…i’d just thought that you have.”
“no..have you ever..you know..” he didn’t want to say anything else.
“ever…” you were waiting for him to ask.
“been eaten out.” he blurted. his boner making things worse.
“oh! um no i haven’t. i’ve like imagined it but nope, never happened to me.” the movie was the least of both of your worries now that you were both thinking of the same topic.
matt couldn’t help but imagine how you’d be in that situation. someone’s head in between your thighs — preferably his head.
“all quiet now.. have i made things awkward.” you pretended to wince.
“oh, no sorry i was just thinking… i kinda wanna know how to. like how to eat a girl out, it’d be good to have some experience i guess.” he confessed.
“uh huh…” you nodded slowly. “maybe…you can practice? on me.”
his eyes widened at your proposal. “you don’t think it would be a little weird?”
“no, im just gonna tell you what feels good and then we’ll both get what we want! given you make me cum, duh.” you laughed.
keep it cool. you thought.
“are you sure?” matt asked again, not wanting for this to be something you’d regret in the near future.
you nodded and that’s how you got to the position in which you were leaned against the headboard waiting for matt to take your underwear off.
“go ahead.” you reassured him as he toyed with your waistband.
“okay.” he whispered pulling your panties down slowly.
the suspense of the situation had you aroused. you were excited but at the same time nervous. you kept telling yourself, he’s your best friend, it’s okay. he won’t do anything you’re uncomfortable with.
your pussy and matt were face to face. he gulped a little intimated because he wanted to be good at it.
“sooo i just, go right in?” he asked pursing his lips.
“i guess so… maybe idk, foreplay? or wait is this considered foreplay?” you asked confused.
“i don’t- im not sure.” he said, unable to tear his eyes away from your center.
“okay, so maybe like use your fingers first?” you knew it was seconds away from being awkward.
as you were about to just say forget it you felt matt’s finger ghost over your leaky hole. he gathered some of your arousal and lathered it over your clit. he then continued to stimulate your clit. your legs bucked up at the sensation.
“am i doing okay?” he whispered, the only thing illuminating his face was the sunset lamp in the corner of your room.
“y-yeah.” you moaned slightly, as he continued to stimulate you. you looked down at him, his fluffy hair and his beautiful eyes. the sight alone had you wanting to just-
your thoughts couldn’t even complete because you felt matt’s hot tongue on you. you let out a deep breath as you leaned back and closed your eyes at the pleasure.
his tongue flicked over your clit as he looked up at you for reassurance that he was making you feel good. while matt was taking his time, his thoughts were elsewhere enjoying the way you tasted. in seconds he was devouring you, addicted to the way you tasted.
he licked a long stripe over your center pulling your thighs toward him. he sucked on your puffy clit. “r-right there. fuck—” your eyes tightly shut.
“you taste so fucking good…” matt muttered against you. he was consuming you. it was as if he lost all control in himself. he couldn’t get enough. “tell me how good i’m doing.”
you nodded quickly. “you’re doing s-so good.” you threaded your hands through his brunette hair. yes you had fantasized about this situation — not with matt specifically but this situation for sure.
matt’s ego boosted as a spurt of whimpers escaped you as he entered his middle finger in you. he pumped it in and out whilst continuing his previous work on your clit. he had been doing so good, you were on the verge of cumming.
matt could tell too — by the way your thighs were starting to close around his head and shake. he didn’t know how he had lived without the taste of you on his tongue. he didn’t ever want to stop. he wanted to do this everyday of his life.
you tried to blurt out the words but you struggled; sensitive to how fast he was flicking your clit. he looked up to see your struggle and grinned against you.
“go on, cum on my tongue. i wanna taste it.” he begged. matt needed to taste you. he enjoyed seeing you writhing underneath him. the way you were struggling to grapple onto reality.
you nodded finally feeling your body seize up as your orgasm washed over you like a big wave. you were tugging on matt’s hair trying to get him away from your sensitive pussy but your orgasm made him want to push you further.
you had begun to feel so sensitive you tried to push his head away as much as you could while whining. “f-fuck — sensitive matt.” you begged and he finally pulled away.
your chest was heaving up and down. you had started to slow your breathing and opened your eyes. matt with your shiny substance drooled and covering his mouth and chin. he had a smug grin on his face symbolizing he was definitely pleased with himself.
“please tell me you’ll let me do that again.” he licked his lips.
you took another deep breath and combed through his hair with your hand. “how could i not?”
© slxtarchive
#𖦹°‧★ 𝑺𝑳𝑿𝑻𝑨𝑹𝑪𝑯𝑰𝑽𝑬#𝑴𝑨𝑻𝑻 𝑺𝑻𝑼𝑹𝑵𝑰𝑶𝑳𝑶 ᝰ.ᐟ#matt sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo angst#matthew sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo x y/n#matt sturniolo x you#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo smut#matt sturniolo x reader#matthew sturniolo#matt sturniolo#matthew sturniolo angst#matthew sturniolo au
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only you, always
words: 1.6k
warnings: 18+ only, smut, cheating, fingering, p in v sex, unprotected sex
you would never admit it out loud to anyone, but a twisted part of you likes when rafe cheats on you. its a dark truth, one you wrestle with every time it happens.
it's always when he's blackout drunk or high at a party, usually a combination of both. it's often when you're fighting or on a “break”. like last week, when your blowout argument ended with rafe slamming the door behind him and stomping out into the night. you were quick to hear that he made out with some girl at kelce's party. the pain lasted until the next day when he showed up back home, disheveled and tear-streaked, clutching a bouquet of flowers.
“i fucked up.” he croaked.
you just stared at him until he fell to his knees, blue eyes rimmed with red as he pressed his forehead against your stomach. “please don’t leave me. i can’t lose you.”
the cheating hurts you every time, but rafe coming back crawling and crying, begging your forgiveness and worshiping you for the next few weeks always makes up for it.
“hi beautiful.” rafe kisses at your cheeks, a week having passed from your fight and his infidelity, the tension replaced with the warmth of his lips against your skin.
“hey.” you smile, running your fingers over his face, stubble gracing his cheeks as he hasn't shaved for the last couple days, preferring to spend every waking moment with you instead as if he’s afraid you might slip away.
“i love you so much.” rafe leans in and kisses the tip of your nose this time, then your forehead, before dropping down to your lips.
“i don't deserve you.” rafe whispers before kissing you again.
“you probably don't.” you giggle, rolling on the bed so you're fully on top, pinning him beneath you.
“i said i was sorry.” rafe pouts.
“and i forgave you.” you shake your head, your voice gentle but firm, realizing you probably shouldn't make fun of the situation, but humor feels safer than vulnerability.
“it won't happen again.” rafe says. it always does, yet he always promises it won't. maybe as you both grow older and more mature, both stop drinking and fighting so much, it will really be over, breaking the cycle. at least this time it was just kissing some random girl instead of sleeping with her.
you knew what you were getting into when you began dating rafe. he came with a wild reputation and an even wilder past. practically everyone in your friend group had a one night stand with rafe, but you didn't mind, because he chose to come back to you, not anyone else.
“what are you thinking about baby?” rafe asks, watching the emotions flicker over your face.
“just how good of a boyfriend you can be.” you answer with a small smile.
“yeah?” rafe smirks, his head tilting to the side as a mischievous look flashes over his eyes. “do you want me to show you just how good of a boyfriend or do you want breakfast first?”
“you first.” you say quickly. “and then bacon and eggs.”
“scrambled or sunny side up?”
“scrambled of course.”
rafe grin grows, hands moving against your bare skin. “just like im about to scramble your-”
“allllright.” you cut him off before he can finish his joke, laughing as you roll off of him.
“no come back.” he pouts, pulling you back against his body, molding his chest to your back as he spoons you.
“you're so ridiculous.” you chuff, though your voice betrays the affection simmering beneath the surface.
“ridiculously in love with you.” rafe counters, pressing a kiss to your bare shoulder. he just had you last night, but he's already craving you again, missing the feeling of your bodies pressed together in the most intimate way.
“you're extra corny this morning.” you hum out.
“sorry.” rafe chuckles. you love that he's only like this around you, and only when he's just cheated. he turns into a dopey lovesick puppy until the need for your forgiveness and guilt wears off and he's back to his normal self.
rafe places his hand on your stomach, circling around your soft skin, each movement sweeping lower every time, deliberate and teasing.
“rafe.” you whine, eyes shutting as he begins to dip into your underwear with every gesture.
“mhm.” rafe hums. as much as he likes to tease you, he wants to pleasure you more. his hand dips all the way into your underwear, fingertips coming to your clit.
he knows your body so well, exactly what to do to drive you crazy, every touch sending electricity through your body. his strokes over your clit are gentle, occasionally purposely missing to rub lower towards your entrance, like he's teasing where he's going to be later. it’s a dance you’ve done a hundred times before, but it never gets old.
“that feels so good.” you moan out, not even realizing that your eyes had fallen closed. rafe moves his other hand so it's under your body, your head coming to rest on his shoulder as he sculpts himself around you, other hand cupping your chest.
“mmm.” you hum, feeling rafes hardness pressing against your bum as his fingers stop teasing your clit, rubbing intensely now with the purpose of getting you wet and open.
“oh, baby.” rafe moans as you reach behind your back, hand cupping over his underwear, squeezing at his length through the fabric.
“fuck me. please.” you begin to move your hips, grinding yourself against his hand.
“be patient.” he tsks, fingers pinching at your nipple before going back to cupping your breast.
“unfair.” you pout, but decide two can play at that game, bringing your hand underneath his waistband to stroke up and down his cock.
you can't see rafes face, but you're sure his expression just shifted to one of pleasure.
his hand delves further between your legs, finger circling around your entrance only once before pushing into your cunt, making you moan loudly.
“fuck yes.” you rock your hips again, this time back against rafes crotch, your hand still moving up and down his cock.
“god, i can barely wait.” rafe groans, finger moving faster inside of you, building you up as quickly as he can.
“stop waiting then.” you move your hand, turning onto your back, rafes hand maneuvering to still fuck into you. “come on, rafey.”
you know once he sees your pout he can't resist, not when he's still making things up to you.
“god, that face kills me.” he presses a quick kiss against your lips before moving, pulling your underwear down and flinging them off the bed before disrobing himself.
you grin as rafe doesn't even bother to ask how you want him, instantly lying himself over top of you and lining up his cock with your entrance.
“i love you.” you press a kiss against rafes cheek as your arms loop around his shoulders.
“i love you.” rafe echos back, connecting your lips that quickly develop into moans as he pushes inside of you, engulfing his cock in your heat.
rafe knows he doesn’t need to give you time, already used to his cock being sheathed inside of you. he begins to swing his hips in an even rhythm.
your fingertips dig into his shoulders, pressing into his tanned skin.
“nobody even gets close to you.” rafe groans as you tighten your cunt around him every time he pulls out to thrust back in.
“its only you.” rafe continues as he drops one hand between your bodies, placing his thumb against your clit as he rubs to the rhythm of his thrusts. “only you.”
you can't help that smile that stretches across your face. you don't give a shit if it's only you, as long as he continues to fuck you like this and treat you like a queen.
“faster, rafe.” you pull his chest tighter against yours, your nipples pressing against his skin, stimulating them with his every movement as he speeds up.
“c-close.” you whine.
“me too.” rafe grunts in agreement. “gonna cum in you, yeah?”
“yes.” you nod rapidly. “yes, please, please, please, rafe.”
your head is swirling with the overwhelming pleasure as rafes thumb presses against your clit just as his cock is thrust deep inside of you. it's enough to throw you over the edge, back arching up into rafe as you moan loudly, legs shaking as you feel him lose it to, his moans loud in your ear as he pumps into you.
“fuck, b-baby, y/n.” rafe groans as he finishes, making sure you get every last drop inside of you.
rafe drops himself to the side of you, the mattress bouncing as you both become slack against the sheets, hearts beating fast and chest rising and falling rapidly.
“i really do love you baby.” rafe says, his voice soft and slightly hoarse. “im sorry i always fuck things up.”
“you don't, though.” you move so you're resting against rafes chest, snuggled against his side. “you make mistakes but you always come back and make it right, that's all i ask for.”
you hear rafe sniffle and you know he's holding back tears, always extra emotional after a reconciliation, as if hes purging himself from the guilt.
“ill go make you some breakfast now if you wanna get dressed.” rafe slides quickly off the bed, keeping his back to you as he pulls his underwear back on.
“why would i get dressed if i want you to fuck me again after breakfast?” you tease, your lip quirking up.
you see rafes hand raise to his face, and you know he's wiping at his cheeks, but you give him time to collect himself, secretly happy only you can make him act like this.
“alright.” rafe turns around, his eyes still glossy but filled with adoration as he bends down to press a kiss to your forehead. “bacon and scrambled eggs and then ill fuck you on the table, then in the shower, then ill take you shopping and fuck you in the dressing room.”
“perfect.” you grin.
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