#I JUST FIGURE IT OUR. weasel is in

[stiffyck]

Hi stiff,,,,

Im holding your hand <3

Hope you have a nice dayyy

We ar- we’re holding hammnds flgkdari

[daughterofsarenrae]

do you ever feel bad for accidentally spreading misinformation? like telling people something you thought was true only to find out later was wrong? for example, i used to tell people ferrets were smart. but then i met sparrow, who is perhaps one of the dumbest animals alive,

[marinerainbow]

So I've found this cover of It's Tough to be a God and now I can't stop imagining Poppy and Shiny in this position.

Don't ask me how two toon ladies got pulled into being worshipped as goddesses, but it's living in my head rent-free now, and I have no idea how to vent it out.

[heartfullofleeches]

"You aren't my partner."

How did you figure it out so soon?

This was never meant to happen. Liu swore to themselves they'd never live another person's life for the sake of love. As horrible as sounds is, they only took your partner's face to drive a wedge in your relationship. It should have been quick. A one and done deal, but the day they arrived at your home- The love pouring from you as you brisked them through the front door.

They just couldn't resist.

Surely, you didn't know for certain. It's all speculation- It has to be. If they play their cards right, they can safely weasel their way out of this. Find another way into your heart. As long as they didn't let their mask slip, there was still another chance.

"What...uh... What makes you say that, Love?"

Inhaling forkfuls of the most mouth watering eggs you've ever had the privilege to stuff pass your lips, you pause momentarily to take a few swigs of the fruit juice your "partner" made for you that morning. Not too runny, not too dry. Just like the juice was a perfect blend between the sweetest of sugar and the fruit's natural flavors.

"For starters...mmm." You lick the crumbs of toast from the corners of your mouth, scrapping the last few bites of egg onto the remainder of the bread left on your plate. "My partner - Well, my ex, couldn't cook to save their life. That, and I'm pretty sure they've been cheating on me for the past month and a half. I was planning on confronting them the night you showed up - man, this is good - but then you made me dinner that was the best home cooked meal I had in ages and the thought slipped my mind."

Your...ex. "I know there's still a lot we need to discuss, but since you're single do you think we could-"

"If whoever you are underneath that disguise looks half as good as you can cook, we can get married this weekend for all I care."

Liu combs their hair over the sides of their face - their cheeks splitting from the stretch of their smile. "I suppose I should get myself ready for our first proper date then."

[internetskiff]

The most powerful ability exclusive to humanity in the Half Life/Portal shared universe is our ability to just throw bullshit at the wall and see what sticks. Aperture "OSHA are the devil" Science have managed to create completely safe interconnected points in space. The same company that turns people's blood into gasoline and shoves lions and humans into the same enclosed space for the vague concept of "Science". Meanwhile Black Mesa still has to use Xen as a crossing and their teleportation device requires an entire reactor with a village's worth of staff constantly maintaining it, just to end up having most of said staff abducted by onion-headed aliens. Even the resistance hasn't managed to create completely stable teleporters with a compressed Xen relay, meanwhile Aperture just went "oh dude let's shove a black hole into a non-waterproof gun" and have just created a teleportation method that just removes Xen from the equation entirely. Doesn't change the fact they bullshat so bad they basically got themselves gassed to death, but still.

The Resistance are a good example of this too. The Combine seem to have a complete set-in-stone thought process and understanding of science which meant they didn't even begin to explore local teleportation via Xen, meanwhile a group of random human mechanics and scientists have managed to cobble together at least two semi-functional local teleporters out of scrap metal and stolen Combine tech, to the point the All-Consuming Interdimensional Empire had to straight up copy their homework. And that isn't even the only time they seem to be taking human shit to just copy the blueprints.

They 100% just yoinked the entire damn car out of that garage just to take a crack at reverse-engineering the Tau Cannon attached to it. Even Resistance weaponry somehow manages to rival or at least stand equal to Combine tech - and we're talking improvised crossbows that shoot superheated rods of rebar at the target compared to high-tech rifles that can discharge orbs of pure dark energy. The collapse of the entire Citadel is basically set into motion as a result of a cobbled together Rebel device placed into extremely capable hands.

The events of the Portal games are a case of extremely elaborate machinelike planning versus pure human improvisation, with Chell's entire escape in the first game involving her simply weaseling her way through small cracks that GLaDOS missed while setting up her ambushes, eventually turning her own rocket turret against her to destroy her.

I suppose you could argue this falls flat in Portal 2 with Wheatley, but it's important to remember he's designed to be an utter idiot, so it's safe to say he wouldn't obsess over the larger picture like GLaDOS to the point where he fails to see the cracks. Yes, he's the one that breaks Chell out of the test chambers again, and yes, he's the one that came up with the sabotage plot - but it's important to note while he knows what to target in the sabotage, when we actually get there he doesn't quite know how to sabotage it, leaving Chell to figure it out on her own. She botches the Turret Quality Control Line with some minor guidance, but it's basically completely up to her to figure out how to cut off the Neurotoxin Supply. It's through her improvisation that Wheatley even manages to get into GLaDOS' chamber, tumbling through her neurotoxin vent and shattering the glass cage she trapped Chell inside of. It's through Chell's improvisation that the Core Transfer even occurs in the first place.

The script is flipped specifically when Wheatley takes charge, because oops - turns out a mind capable of focusing on the bigger picture might be pretty important when it comes to running an entire facility powered by it's own Reactor. Wheatley just completely zeroes in on his own personal pleasure, hacking up test chambers and the objects within them to try and figure out the easiest way to get his solution euphoria as quick as possible.

Still, something that's pretty interesting is that only Wheatley has ever managed to create a trap that's impossible to foresee and avoid, something GLaDOS has repeatedly failed to do to the point she ends up commending him. I believe this is because his way of thinking is a lot closer to Chell's compared to GLaDOS'. He puts up way more of a fight as the two run through the facility trying to get to him, seemingly improvising on the spot just like Chell has been over the course of the two games. Even his lair would be impossible to survive if it weren't for a single Conversion Gel pipe he somehow failed to notice and remove.

Whether in a laboratory deep beneath the soil or an alien tower tall enough to split the clouds, the ingenuity of even a single person is enough to topple a tower or destroy a supercomputer 3 times over.

Marc Laidlaw put what I'm trying to say into a single sentence when writing for the BreenGrub twitter account:

"The superstructure is riddled with cracks."

[winchesterwild78]

Happy New Year 

Master List

Characters: Jensen Ackles x Reader, mentions of Danneel, reader’s husband, and other people. 

Warnings: SMUT!, cheating (I don’t condone it-this is FICTION), praise kink, breeding kink

A/N: I’m currently on medication for a Sinus Infection, Bronchitis and Walking Pneumonia. The steroids really screw with my brain. This little nugget of a story came to me last night. 

I don’t condone cheating, this is fiction. Please don’t come at me. 

This story has SMUT and not much of a story line if it’s not your thing please don’t read it. 

Jensen and Reader are co-workers and end up at the same New Year’s Eve party. Jensen and the reader find themselves alone and things unfold very quickly. 

Written fast and not edited well. Please overlook any errors. 

All work is my own, please don’t take it in any way. Reblogs and comments are always appreciated. 

Minors DNI 18+

“Honey, we’re going to be late.” I called from downstairs to my husband. “I’m coming. I couldn’t find my wallet.” 

“Wow, look at you. I love the dress. Is it new?” I blushed a little. How was I supposed to tell him it was a gift from Jensen? “Yeah. Just got it. Figured I’d wear it tonight.” 

“Well it’s very nice.” His tone changed a little. “Are you okay?” I asked, trying to search his face. 

“Yeah, I’m just not used to seeing you wear something like that and it’s a bit revealing.” 

“Oh, yeah I get it. I can change.” “No, it’s fine. Just take a shawl or something. I know how you get when you drink and I don’t want everyone there seeing your body.” 

I felt a little angry and insecure when he said that. Of course he always had something to say about anything I wore or ate or how I had my hair done. 

I grabbed my shawl and purse. “Ready?” “Yeah I guess so.” I stopped at the door, “If you don’t want to go then don’t. I’m not making you go.” 

“I know but these are your new coworkers and I want to meet them. Especially Erin. She’s a babe.” 

I rolled my eyes. I had been newly hired by Eric to write for the show and I’d met the cast and crew. My husband was completely smitten by Erin. She’s so sweet, and didn’t want him. 

We arrived at the party about an hour after it started. The house was huge and filled with so much energy. Eric greeted us at the door and took my stuff. My husband was less than thrilled when I handed my shawl over. 

He scanned the crowd and found Erin. “Come on, let’s go say hi.” He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards her. 

She was talking to someone when we walked up, but when she saw me she squealed, “Y/N! You made it. I’m so happy you’re here. Oh and you brought a date.” She smiled and looked at my husband. “Honey, this is Erin. Erin, this is my husband.” She extended her hand, “It’s nice to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.” She shook his hand and the bastard kissed the back of her hand, “Nice to meet you too. I’ve heard so much about you. God you’re gorgeous.” 

They started chatting and I excused myself to grab a drink. 

I walked up to the bar, ordered my drink and felt my phone buzz. I pulled it out and saw a text. 

Jensen: That dress looks fucking hot on you. 

I blushed, bit my lip and looked around. There he was, standing off to the side, whiskey in hand and looking incredible. 

Me: I guess you’ve got good taste. 😉

Jensen: Yeah I do. I see your husband is here chatting up all the ladies. 

Me: Yeah. Is D here?

Jensen: Yeah somewhere. No doubt she’s trying to weasel her way into the show. 

I laughed out loud. 

Me: So should I offer to write a part for her or not? 

Jensen: Please don’t. If you do that we can’t have our afternoon writing sessions in my trailer. You wouldn’t want to mess up those, would you? 

My cheeks burned red hot thinking about all those “writing sessions” we had. 

Me: Oh god no. Those are my favorite part of the day. 

Jensen: Me too. 1st floor bathroom in 5 minutes. I need to see that dress up close. 

Me: I can’t wait. 

I could feel the arousal and anticipation building. I saw my husband making his way around the party. No doubt flirting his ass off and trying to get laid by a celebrity. 

I went back up to him and told him I was going to the restroom. He waved me off. He was currently talking to one of the extras from the Herogasm episode. 

I walked down the dark hallway and found the first bathroom. The door was closed so I knocked our knock. The door opened and Jensen pulled me in. 

His lips crashed on mine as he pushed me on the door. One hand pinned mine above my head while the other explored my body. 

He pulled back panting. “God you’re so fucking beautiful and this dress, holy hell you’re hot.” 

Jensen’s lips trailed down my body and I shivered. His hands grabbed the hem of my dress and pulled up above my hips. Exposing my soaked panties to the chilly air. His fingers slipped between my legs and found the dampened fabric. He smirked. 

“Damn baby you’re already ready for me.” His fingers moved the fabric to the side and he found my soaked entrance. Pushing two fingers in, I gasped. 

“Mmm there you go baby. You like that don’t you? Taking all I have to offer like the good girl you are.” 

I got wetter. Something about Jensen praising me just turned me on more. 

“I’m gonna fuck a baby into this pussy. Let everyone know who you belong to. You’d like that wouldn’t you?” His fingers pumped faster as his thumb found my clit. “First you’ve got to cum for me. Cum on baby. Let go. Let me feel you come undone on my fingers.” 

He pushed further in and hooked up. Hitting that soft spot deep in my core. My hands were holding on to his shoulders as his hot breath drifted over my body. 

“Jens, I’m close. Oh fuck baby! Right there.” “Cum for me baby. I want to feel you.” My body responded to his command and I came hard. Moaning loudly, his lips covered mine. “Shh, you have to keep it down baby.” 

He kept rubbing and my body was so overstimulated. 

“Come on baby, I know you have one more in there. I need to make sure my girl is satisfied. 

My heart fluttered in my chest, “my girl” oh how I wished it was true. I’d give anything to be his girl, and not just his mistress. 

I was close again, and he felt it. He stopped and a whine escaped my lips, “it’s okay baby. I’ve got you.” I heard his zipper and his belt. My hand found his hard member and I pumped him a few times. I dropped down and took him in my mouth. Sucking and licking his cock like it was the only thing keeping me alive. 

His hands fisted my hair, and he pushed my face down his cock. The sounds in the bathroom were pornographic and full of want and need. We knew what we were doing was wrong, but anytime we were together, nothing, nobody else mattered. It was just us, raw, and unfiltered. 

He pulled me off of him and turned me around. He gently laid my stomach on the counter, facing the sink. 

“You ready baby?” I nodded. He sunk his hard cock into my soaked pussy with one hard thrust he bottomed out. We both gasped and he gripped my hips. “Fuck baby, you’re so tight. I fit perfectly inside you. We were made for each other.” 

My mind drifted to the fantasy I kept hidden deep inside. The one where I was his and he was mine, completely and out in the public eye. I had fallen in love with him, but kept it to myself. 

Anytime I was in his arms I felt like I was the only thing that mattered to him. Even if it wasn’t true. 

He lifted my head up to meet his gaze in the mirror. “There she is. My beautiful girl. God I could get used to this. I want to fuck a baby into you. Mark you forever as mine.” I bit my lip and stared into his darkened green eyes. “Do it, Jensen. Make me yours. Fuck a baby into me.” 

He smirked and his hips snapped harder into me. He pulled out, spun me around and lifted me onto the counter. 

His lips crashed on mine and his hand slipped between us, finding my engorged, sensitive clit. He began to rub, “Cum for me again, baby. Cum on my cock.” Just as I was about to cum there was a knock on the door. We froze.

“Um just a minute.” I was able to squeak out. “Y/N?” I froze and looked at Jensen. It was Danneel. “Yeah, hey D.” “You haven't seen Jensen have you?” 

He looked at me and smirked, I bit my lip. Then the bastard started kissing down my neck and rubbing my clit again. “Um, no. I haven’t. Not since earlier.” My voice was shaky and Jensen smirked the whole time. Bastard.

“You okay, Y/N? You sound off.” “Yeah, D. I’m just feeling a bit hot and flustered. Must be the alcohol.” “I get it, well, see you later. Bye.” 

When we heard her walk away I slapped Jensen’s chest. He laughed, “You’re a good actress too.” “Jensen, you’re terrible.” “Yeah, but you love me.” 

My eyes flicked up to his. I didn’t know what to say. My heart hammered in my chest and before I could stop myself I said the first thing that came to mind, “Yeah I do. More than you know.” 

His eyes softened and he kissed me softly. His thrusts became softer, and his hands more gentle. Something in him flipped when I said what I did. My mind is running all the scenarios all at once. Did I just screw this up? Is this the last time in his arms, is that why he’s going slow? What is this going to do to our professional relationship?

I felt the familiar tightness in my core, and I knew he felt it too. Jensen kissed my lips and whispered in my ear, “Cum for me baby. Let me feel your walls tighten around my cock.” He kissed me as I came. Moaning in my mouth. 

I could feel he was close. His pace picked up and as he came he locked eyes with me and his lips crashed on mine again. I could feel his seed coating my walls. 

We had always been so careful, but at that moment neither of us cared. As he softened he pulled out and grabbed some tissue to clean us both up. 

We didn’t speak. Just catching our breaths as we got dressed again. 

My heart ached. I felt like this was it. I screwed it up when I professed my love for him. Before turning to leave I looked at him. His green eyes are lighter and full of so much desire and questions.

“Jensen. I’m sorry. I just got swept up in the moment. I didn’t mean to make things complicated.” 

Jensen’s hands softly lifted my face and he cupped my cheeks, “You didn’t make anything complicated, but did you mean it?” My eyes looked deep in his and I swallowed hard. I bit my bottom lip and I took a deep breath. “Yes. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall in love with you, it just happened.” 

His lips landed on mine, shutting me up. When he pulled away, his lips still ghosting mine, “Good, because I love you too.” 

Part 2

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[pupyuj]

waitt im j thinking w recent mean girl wony she’d be the type to leave yn there but then she’d get jealous seeing that yns new shirt is another girl’s 😭😭😭

revisiting this wony to do this ask hehehe good times!

we all like our mean girls vicious and jealous right?? well that's exactly what this meanie wony is like! she'd see you talking to your friends and ignoring her again like the two of you didn't fuck twice in the same night and she'd get sooo upset 🤭🤭 pouting and glaring as you went about the entire morning not looking at her 😭 she did like how you stiffened up whenever you caught her staring at you and checking you out, and how you'd awkwardly pull your collar up just so you can hide the marks she left on your chest... but wonyoung was going to make you didn't have to work so hard to hide them anymore next time! 😵‍💫

the next time in question being in her car?? she's got you trapped between the backseat and herself, her fingers knuckle-deep inside your cunt and her mouth working on your nipple,, and she's doing this while parked on your driveway btw! not at all caring if an innocent stranger was passing by and saw the two of you 😳 oh yeah and that shirt you borrowed from a friend after she messed up yours last night?? well that would be torn off your body and thrown mindlessly somewhere else!

"should've known.. hah... that you'd weasel your back into acting like you don't want me even after all of that..." ugh she'd absolutely leave bite marks all over you as a way to take out her anger 😩 she's obsessed with how your tugging on her hair and that hold you got on the back of her neck, never knowing if you want to push her way or pull her closer... and how you've locked your legs around her thighs just to keep her close to you and fuck you in that ruthless way you've come to like overnight 🫣 she's dragging her long fingers in and out just to make those sweet moans of yours bless her ears... staring at you with only pure lust in her eyes while she sucks and nips at your hard buds...

oh yeah and she'd definitely sit down on the seat herself and make you ride her fingers! just letting you rock your hips into her hand and if i tell you she'd find some use for her other hand and tease your other hole? 🥰 relishing at how you felt tight on both holes... oh she has to properly ruin you in her majestic, king-sized bed one day, she needs to!! and wony doesn't care that you've made a mess out of her little outfit by squirting all over her... normally, she'd make a fuss about it but she couldn't find it in herself to do that with you when you looked so beautiful all fucked out right above her 😋

wony definitely gives you a spare sweater she has in her bag, telling you that you'd have to pay the two-hundred dollars she spent it on it in full if you got even a spot on it while you're borrowing it 😭 seeing your figure so small in her oversized sweater gives her ideas though.. she'd definitely love to fuck you while wearing her clothes... and maybe in an outfit she put you in! she'll save all of that for the future though... 👀

[advisorykitty]

Hello can I make a request? Did you watch the anime Bungo Stray Dogs because I want to request Randal with Reader like Elise. She was "created" by Randal and in the episode when Sebastian first appeared, Randal spent so much time with Sebastian that Elise!Reader was upset because he didn't attend the tea party the two usually held.

Spilled Tea

Elise! Reader x Randal

[Y/N] was furious.

Not the "I'm-going-to-yell-until-my-voice-goes-hoarse" kind of furious—no, it was the quiet, simmering kind that settled deep in her gut, like hot coals waiting for someone to poke at them. She paced the length of the hallway, arms crossed, glaring at the pristine white walls of Luther’s house as if they were the source of all her problems.

Why was she mad?

Because Randal—her dear, ridiculous creator—had once again forgotten their tea party.

It wasn’t like it was some casual thing they did. No, this was tradition. Every week, at the same time, they would gather in the little tea room, surrounded by dainty china and enough sugary snacks to make even Luther cringe. And what had Randal done? Ditched her. For Sebastian.

Ugh. Sebastian.

The new pet—awkward and always a little too stiff—had somehow weaseled his way into Randal’s good graces, and now Randal was all about Sebastian, he wasnt even that good of a birthday gift!. They spent hours together, playing games, talking about who-knows-what, while [Y/N] was left to brew tea alone.

She kicked at the edge of a rug as she stormed down the hall. The sound of her foot smacking the floor echoed, and she half-wondered if anyone was going to come check on her. Probably not. No one ever did.

"They’re all idiots," she muttered, tugging at the ends of her hair in frustration. "Every last one of them."

Just as she was about to storm back into the tea room and throw a cup for good measure, she ran smack into a figure.

Thud.

"Ow!" she yelped, stumbling back.

Nyon stood there, looking bewildered, his large always shocked eyes blinking in confusion. His hat—never removed—tilted a bit to one side as he scratched the back of his head, his fingers moving in a nervous rhythm behind him.

"S-sorry," Nyon muttered, his English broken as usual. "Didn’t see."

"Of course you didn’t," [Y/N] grumbled, rubbing her arm where she’d collided with him. "Nobody does."

"Why... angry?" Nyon asked, tilting his head, trying to figure her out.

"I’m not angry," she snapped automatically, then sighed when she saw his confused look. "Okay, fine. I’m mad. Randal forgot about me again."

Nyon’s expression didn’t change much, but he did take a step back, giving her some space. "Randal... distracted. With... Sebastian."

"Tell me something I don’t know," [Y/N] muttered. She slumped against the wall, crossing her arms tighter around her chest. "He never misses our tea parties. Until now."

Nyon shuffled his feet, clearly not knowing what to say. He wasn’t exactly known for being talkative or helpful in emotional crises. "You still... important," he mumbled.

"Yeah, well, that doesn’t help much," she sighed, feeling the irritation bubbling inside her again. "I feel like I’m just a side note to him now."

Just then, a voice echoed from down the hall.

"You’re still sulking, huh?"

It was Nyen.

He strolled in, smirking as he leaned against the wall. He was always ready to poke fun at her misfortunes. His arms were crossed, and his tone dripped with sarcasm. "What’s the matter? Can’t keep your 'CrEaToRs' attention?"

[Y/N] shot him a glare. "Shut up, Nyen."

"Oh, come on," he said, feigning sympathy. "Did you really think he’d stick around when he has a shiny new toy? How naive can you be?"

She rolled her eyes. "This isn’t just about being jealous, you know. It’s about feeling—"

"Emotional," Nyen cut in, mocking her tone. "Yeah, yeah. Next time, just grab Randal by the collar and drag him to tea. No one’s stopping you."

"Thanks for the advice, really helpful," [Y/N] retorted, but a small part of her appreciated his brazen honesty.

Before she could retort, Randal appeared at the end of the hallway, his usual cheerful demeanor shining through. "Y/N?"

He stood there looking a bit sheepish, as if he had just realized something was off. Sebastian hovered behind him, awkward and unsure, like he was trying to blend into the wallpaper.

"Randal," [Y/N] said, her voice tight with irritation. "Where have you been?"

Randal blinked, clearly confused. "I’ve been with Sebastian," he said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "Why?"

She threw her hands up in exasperation. "Because we were supposed to have our tea party! Remember? The one we have every week?"

"Oh!" Randal’s eyes lit up in recognition. "Right! Our tea party! I forgot!"

"Of course you did," [Y/N] groaned, fighting the urge to scream. "You know, for someone who’s supposed to be my creator, you really suck at remembering plans."

Randal frowned, a hint of guilt creeping onto his face. "I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to forget fufu~"

"Ugh," she sighed, her irritation softening just a bit as she looked at Randal’s crestfallen expression. "Just... let’s have our tea party now, okay? I need some snacks and a distraction from all this."

"Yes! Let’s go!" Randal said, brightening up immediately.

As they started walking towards the tea room, Randal practically skipped to his chair, plopping down with a bright grin. Sebastian, however, hung back, hovering near the door.

"Uh, is it okay if I...?" he started, his voice trailing off as he glanced between Randal and [Y/N].

"Of course, you’re invited, Sebastian!" Randal chirped, motioning for him to join.

Sebastian hesitated, taking a cautious step forward. "I don’t want to interrupt your... thing."

"You're already interrupting it," [Y/N] said, rolling her eyes. "Just sit down."

He slowly approached the table, and as he sat, he looked like he’d just been sentenced to death. "Uh, thanks?"

"You can pour the tea," Randal said, practically bouncing in his seat.

Sebastian looked like he was about to protest but caught [Y/N]’s pointed look and reluctantly picked up the teapot. As he poured, he managed to spill a bit on the tablecloth, his cheeks flushing in embarrassment.

"Smooth move, Sebastian," [Y/N] called, barely holding back her laughter.

"Uh, I’m sorry?? .I—" he stammered, only to be interrupted by Randal.

"Don’t worry, you’ll get the hang of it!" Randal said, waving his hands dramatically. "Just make sure to keep it on the table this time!"

Sebastian sighed, trying to regain his composure. "I was trying to—"

"Just be careful, okay?" [Y/N] interrupted, smirking. "Last thing we need is you drowning in tea."

"Yeah, that would be—" Sebastian started, but once again, Randal cut in.

"Time for the ceremony! Everyone stand up!" Randal declared, his eyes wide with excitement.

Sebastian looked around, clearly perplexed. "Wait, what ceremony?"

"You never mentioned that," he said, trying to make sense of the situation.

"You should’ve asked before coming," [Y/N] said, rolling her eyes, though she couldn’t help but laugh. "It involves Randal being extra and making everyone uncomfortable."

"Yes!" Randal declared, grinning like a fool. "Everyone stand up!"

Sebastian stood awkwardly, clearly unsure of what to do. "Um... am I supposed to do something?"

"You just stand there and look pretty," [Y/N] said, nudging him with a playful grin.

"That’s really not my strong suit," Sebastian muttered.

As Randal began his ridiculous "ceremony," pouring tea into the cups with exaggerated flourishes, [Y/N] couldn’t help but feel a warmth spreading through her. Despite the frustration earlier, watching Randal be his usual weird self made her heart lighten. Even Sebastian's awkwardness started to feel like a welcome change.

Wait. No don't feel that way. Randal is your sole purpose!

As the laughter flowed, Randal suddenly paused, looking serious. "And now, we all make a toast! To tea, friends, and not forgetting our traditions!"

"To tea!" [Y/N] echoed, raising her cup with a smile.

"To—wait, do we have to toast?" Sebastian asked, looking caught off guard.

Randal shot him a wide-eyed stare. "Of course! It’s part of the ceremony!"

Sebastian sighed but raised his cup anyway. "To... tea."

"And to me!" Randal added, grinning madly.

As they all took a sip, Sebastian attempted to interject. "I was thinking—"

But Randal cut him off again, waving his arms. "No time for thinking! We need more sugar!"

Sebastian’s mouth opened, clearly about to say something, but Randal continued. "You know, if you mix the sugar with the milk just right, it tastes like—"

"Randal, I really—" Sebastian tried again, but Randal was on a roll.

"And don’t forget the cookies! They must be chocolate chip, or else they’re just eugh!!"

"Randal can i-"

[Y/N] quickly interrupted Sebastian again.

"Sure I'll go get the cookies!" She giggled and skipped to the kitchen, feeling happy about the passive aggressive revenge she had gotten on Sebastian.

It was his fault for interfering anyway.

[weebsinstash]

As much as I want to have children by this man, let's take a moment to sip our platonic yandere Miguel juice

-i can't decide which sex he'd be more partial to in a 'child'/you since in the movie there was Gabriella but in the comics he eventually has a son who becomes the next Spiderman but--

-as a girl i just naturally think of a lot of those sorts of gender specific ideas 👉👈 he's this big scary hulking intimidating threat and his "daughter" is the one melting his cold exterior

-doesnt matter if you're a grown ass woman, Miguel sees you struggling to braid your hair and suddenly here he is, full dad mode, doing it for you,and depending on how close you two are, maybe he disguises it with "ugh, stop spending so much time messing around with that. If I do it for you will you get back to work? 🙄", but really it's just your new self proclaimed dad/tio wanting to help braid your hair and help you feel pretty and, oh, how he can fondly remember the last time he helped braid "his daughter's" hair...

-of course this evolves to him just loving to do things with your hair. Braid it, wear it natural, style it, use products on it, hes got you. you were just trying to put your hair in a lazy updo like a ponytail or bun and this man doesn't let you leave until he's got you completely combed out, hair braided with ribbons, and of course this entire time youre awkwardly sitting there in a chair in his absolute cave of a workstation with this gargantuan 6'9 man there, "so how was your day? Staying out of trouble?"

-really I mean. Is stealing other people's kids NOT technically in character for him. You're unfortunate enough to trauma bond with this man and you're never getting rid of him

-you hear Miles Morales call him tio (as in the tio meaning dude) and you jokingly teasingly start calling him tio, which Miguel secretly pretends is the version that means uncle. You're just constantly joking around or looking up at him with these big pouty eyes, "but tio 🥺 can't I PLEASE--" and its like. Lmao people know that if they need to ask Miguel for a favor, that it increases their chances to have you ask in their stead

- I mean, as a female adult abused as a child by my own father, raised by a single mom myself, like...

Reader flinches away when Peter B goes to give you a supportive pat on the back or comes in for a high five after a mission and you force yourself to laugh because you're feeling more than just a little awkward and in the spotlight. "Oh, sorry, that was dumb!" And they eventually get you to kind of anxiously word vomit "my dad used to just kind of, rough me up sometimes when I did something wrong! It-it could've been a lot worse honestly, but, it-it just makes me kinda jumpy around guys sometimes! It's not a big deal, or personal or anything. I'm sorry if I made you feel bad 🥺"

Peter B, Jessica, and Miguel all there as older parental figures and also literal parents, immediately exchange looks and agree like "oh hell naw, don't like that" and you get silently adopted by all three of em right then and there

-if it's a physically abusive father and you're still the victim of abuse, I imagine your dad had some suspicious figures suddenly show up in the middle of the night to terrify and threaten the shit out of him and suddenly you aren't getting as manhandled anymore

-can you imagine, like, you show up to Spider Society one day with a black eye "oh, this? It's, it's nothing. My dad is just, he's about to make police captain and he's really stressed about it is all" cue all your friends mentally high fiving around the table because your abusive piece of shit dad is going to die and you don't even know. When it happens they'll all be "oh no, sweetie, I'm SOOOO sorry :(" meanwhile they're thrilled bc now you don't have any parents and they can weasel in there as your new family, schedule your birthday parties, monopolizing more of your time, things like that

-goddd I just imagine it could become some kind of weird fucked up enmeshed scenario where the structure it's providing for your life is actually good for you meanwhile Miguel is like, retroactively kind of soothing some of his trauma both from his own childhood and what happened with the second universe he broke that it's just like. You're a grown ass adult and this man is tucking you in goodnight and saying "te amo, mija" at the doorway and you bet his ass is going to stand there and not let you sleep until you say it back. He knows you're just absolutely seething at him and he'll still refuse to leave without a grumbling "te amo, papá 🙄"

-He eventually just has you doing so much shit and depending on him so much that it starts to become second nature to you. one day you're in the Society doing one of the odd jobs you're allowed to help with and suddenly you're thinking, "Ugh I actually don't know what to do next, I wish Papá was here to-- WAIT SHIT NO I MEAN MIGUEL--"

-lmaooooo as a non Spanish speaker I keep thinking of how awwwwwful it would be if he actually forces you to learn Spanish. Not inherently because there's anything wrong with Spanish, but, I'm not always smart, and I can just SEE him quizzing your ass, forcing you to have entire conversations in Spanish, always clicking his tongue or chuckling at you when you make a mistake and he just thinks you're so cute struggling to learn 🥰 man hears you're trying to take extra lessons from Miles and he instantly drops everything he's doing to go track the little scamp down. Insert meme "I can forgive being an anomaly but I draw the line at teaching Reader bad Spanish"

-siiiiiiigh eventually the day comes when you're in big danger and you need his help, maybe you disobeyed him and was hanging out with some other Spiders in another dimension when there was a sudden villain attack, and he comes to your rescue as a villain does something dramatic like has a gun to your head or a knife to your neck and the second you see him you're just overwhelmed wirh a sense of relief, calling out for him, calling him dad/tio/papá whatever, and he's just like 😭❤️ pumping his fist internally, like YES you are so grounded when you get back home but also 🥰 you finally called him dad without him having to twist your arm 🥰 nevermind if the "villain" who kidnapped you was actually a Spider who owed him a favor, and this whole thing was to teach you a lesson about listening to your Papá, that's not important ❤️

-Miguel who forces you to learn Spanish vs Miguel who forces you to be Catholic. I can excuse kidnapping and forced adoption but I draw the line at making me practice religion 💀 no but seriously, he probably does have certain morals and values he instills/forces upon you if he thinks you need them, and he'll probably be one of those fathers, "are you leaving the house dressed like that? Go change" and orders you not to hang out with certain people he doesn't approve of or thinks have bad character (like hobie lmao)

-bruh you two will be on a super serious important mission and this man will be like "it's dark, hold my hand so we dont get separated"

Eventually it comes to a point where you're, not perfectly behaved but, just about. If someone finds Miguel, it means you're not very far away, or vice versa. Members of the Society quickly learn not to make any advances on you or make any "adult" comments unless they want to get suspiciously hurt during a personal training session by the big boss himself. You think you're safe just cause Miguel isn't around? Nah, cause then you have Peter B and Jess keeping an eye on you, and, not that YOU'RE aware of the extent, but, if Miguel ever gets worried, he can just ask Lyla what you've been getting up to, since your modified little daypass has her installed into it and she can track your every move ❤️ helicopter parent? Oh honey, you have NO idea...

[thepaintedsable]

My sketchbook is a mess. Everything is one good sneeze from flying away. ANYWAYS TF2 YAY YIPPEEE!!!

I made them animals because it brings be joy and also I couldn’t get fake lizard Pyro out of my head and that obviously meant he needed a whole team to match.

I’d like to think that reptiles are just normal animals in whatever world this is, so Pyro is fooling nobody and is also extremely scary. Why are you so tall, lizard boy? Stop that.

Also coyote Spy and coydog Scout. These two are very not related as you can clearly tell. Not one bit of resemblance whatsoever no sir.

“Skink” Pyro, Coyote Spy, Coydog Scout, Kangaroo Sniper, Stoat Medic, Bear Heavy, Mule Soldier, and Ram Demo.

Pyro was the most obvious to me. I may or may not have chosen my favorite lizard just because they are both very cool and extremely elusive to me. I know nothing about these guys (I could fix this, but I don’t) yet I smile every time I see one. They’re just silly. 5 banded because of the fun coloration!

Coyote Spy and Coydog Scout go hand in hand in terms of choice, here. I wanted a wild-type animal for Spy and some sort of mix for Scout, preferably something that could be written off but is way too coincidental when they’re next to each other lmfao. I really liked the Zorse/Zebra idea but I felt like I couldn’t have that with Mule Soldier.

Sniper is only a Kangaroo because I can’t draw a kea or a kākāpō. I will continue to figure out how to draw a kea and/or a kākāpō and also shape it properly to Snipers long face, so help me god. They’re birds native to New Zealand (Sniper was born in New Zealand), threatened to critically endangered (Sniper is, very technically in TF2, one of the last New Zealanders alive if you think about it), and he stuck out compared to his folks in Australia. Also I think he should have the right to dismantle a car (Keas are very smart :) )

STOAT MEDIC!!!! Or honestly any weasel, ferret, or martin. They are sneaky, intelligent hunters, and generally spook me. That there is a snake with fur and also has managed to take our multiple populations in multiple areas because we keep putting them places. I think a weasel would steal souls.

Bear Heavy.

Mule Soldier! The US Army mascot is a Mule, and considering how military-crazed soldier is I think it was a good fit. Coulda also done a bulldog, but his name is “soldier” not “marine”.

And Demo still needs some work because I am not at all happy with his design! Yippee!

[kiraridertime03]

We need to free the Weasel

A brief discussion about the way that Creature Commandos uses politics in its narratives.

Spoilers for it and everything else James Gun DC up to this point though, below the cut.

Also, it is a busy post, content warnings for discussions of white supremacists and cops, as it is necessary.

With the release of the trailer of James Gunn's Superman film, hype for his grand DC Universe has kicked into high gear, and for good reason. That trailer, no matter the quality of the final film, is a goddamn work of art. A piece of film that understands Superman better over the course of 2 minutes and 20 seconds than Zack Snyder did over the course of 3 overlong movies. That mixed with his solid back catalogue of Superhero films. However, slightly more obscurely, this universe has already started with the animated series Creature Commandos, and especially with the fourth episode, which released hours before Superman's trailer, shows the kind of skill and thought Gunn and co. are putting into this new universe.

At its front, Creature Commandos feels very... blunt, in a lot of ways. It's like The Suicide Squad but with Creatures! It's big and raunchy, being an animated series with blood and swearing and sex and whatnot. And, when it comes with its politics, some of the early villain's mooks are a bunch of weird incels, and one of the main characters constantly advocates for killing Nazis. It is a work that immediately shows its hand, making the type who would decry the wokeness of modern movies and games or whatever. However, with these early examples, it can feel like a bit too much, maybe. I love it, don't get me wrong, I'm the type to really enjoy blunt earnestness. Though, given the more comedic approach that many of these elements take in the early episodes, it can feel a bit like it's only there for the bit.

Where the series really starts to excel, though, is when it starts integrating its flashback segments. As a whole, even outside the point of this post, the flashbacks feel like a wonderful decision. A way of fleshing out our characters while giving each episode a distinct feel, justifying the series as, well, a series rather than just one long movie. However, here, I want to discuss some of its political ideas, and how they integrate. Because, for these, they integrate more thematically, being an undertone to each character's own story.

For the bride, her story is centered around this idea of the objectification of women. I mean, it makes sense. She was literally made to simply be the bride of Frankenstein, an object of his affection. However, as she gained her own independence, the masculine figure who feels he is owed her hand in marriage breaks out into a rage, harming her and the person she actually loves. This story is what gives her the cynical edge she gains in the series proper, giving her an interesting, sympathetic story while using the elements of said story to say something about how many men perceive woman. A strong enough parable that acts as an undercurrent for her character.

Then, we get to G.I. Robot's episode, a real tear-jerker of a thing about a silly robot character, the exact thing to set my brain off in all sorts of ways. Much of this story is designed to set up his tragic past, so that we can feel catharsis once he gets his big moment, then feel the tragedy when he gets brutally murdered. However, it again is saying a lot of complex things. Many have discussed the PTSD angle for GI, which I do see, however, in GI's story specifically, I see the way that the American state treats veterans. Like, think about it. This being who was forged and created for the purpose of making war, goes to war, then once the war is over, they are, best, used for spectacle on live TV (Where they are unable to properly adjust to the tone of peacetime, accusing the audience of being Nazis themselves), studied not to help them, but to make the next generation of soldiers even more efficient at their goal of warcraft, then thrown to the side when they are no longer useful. The man selling GI to the collector literally says he slipped through the cracks. It, again, is a wonderful metaphor that takes advantage of what GI is, and uses it to emphasize these issues in a more literal way. It is a lot easier to show a robot who was programmed in a specific way weird the room out than the rocky adjustments a veteran may have to go through. It then, also, shows the kinds of people who really benefit from this warcraft, those it appeals to. The collector who buys GI turns out to be a part of a White Supremacist group in America, a group of people who gladly use Nazi iconography, identify with it, and gladly push it. Those also happen to be the types who want to buy old war memorabilia. Obviously, not all war collectors are Nazis. But these are people who see this kind of might makes right ideology that America so often employs with its military, and latch onto it. GI, rightfully, finds this appaling, and kills them on sight. It is this wonderful moment from this delightfully twisted series.

However, even that could be seen as a tad blunt. Again, GI is very clear with his words, he doesn't hide much. So, where I see this series going from good to great is with Weasel's flashback segments. This begins when a lawyer, a member of a nonprofit, demands she see Weasel, as she is putting on a case for him. In essence, she states that, at least to her and her organization, he was unjustly prosecuted. To both Rick Flag and us, this seems absurd, as we have a lot of predisposed biases towards Weasel. You see, he is one of the few pre-existing characters in this cast. Weasel was previously seen in James Gunn's The Suicide Squad, though only briefly. There, as a member of the Decoy Team, he makes weird, gross noises, they make a joke about him having killed 27 kids, then have him promptly drown before the mission even starts (Though, in the post credit, it turns out he survived, because that's even funnier). Even if you hadn't seen that film (Which you should if you haven't), they reestablish all that in this series in the first few episodes, portraying him as a stupid, vulgar, violent creature who isn't worthy of rights. However, expertly, this is all a front.

In the flashbacks, we learn that Weasel only interacted with about 8 kids, a bunch of students left at an after school program. Contrary to what we had been told, he really just played around with the kids, chasing around a ball. They eventually get inside the school and, while messing with stuff they shouldn't have, start a small fire. However, some antics are afoot. While he is playing around, an old senile man sees this and, rather than asking about what's going on, decides to run back to his home, call the cops about what is a clear, if odd, misunderstanding, then grab his gun to try to take things into his own hands. And, as he does, shakily trying to shoot Weasel, he makes the problem of the small fire worse, shooting a gas canister behind them, turning the small fire into a school-destroying explosion and fire. Then, the cops show up. Many of the kids are already dead, seemingly, but one survived. So, as he pulls her out of the wreckage, what do the cops do? They start shooting. Throughout this whole sequence, the cops do nothing but shoot and get in the way of things. It all culminates in the final shots, where Weasel has dropped the kid after being shot. And, instead of either of them going to get the kid, they both pin Weasel down, try to pull him out. This leaves the young girl to be crushed.

This is a massive tragedy, a game of tragic misudnerstandings that gets kids killed. However, again, it does this by hiding its politics into a genuinely moving character based story to make them more effective. It is a story, in part, about our predisposed biases. I mean, the narrative literally sets this up. Characters around Weasel say things about him without him being able to have a say. Because he's a Weasel. Then, our characters make judgments based on what they believe and what they've heard from secondhand sources over what they actually see. Even when Weasel is his most violent (taking down Circe in episode 3), he does it to protect his teammates, and he doesn't actually kill her. In his backstory, characters make rash decisions based on their misinformed judgments in hopes of "protecting the kids," when all they are actually doing is harming them. They get 8 kids killed all because Weasel is a little freaky.

Then there's the cops themselves. It so masterfully uses showing rather than telling. The most it tells us is of the trail at the start, and again, this is moreso used as setup, playing into our dispositions. However, when it is time to actually depict the injustices, it shuts the fuck up. It doesn't just say that cops are bad with a couple of clear shitheads and moves on. It shows how cops are bad. Their only answer to this situation is violence. They don't actually serve their community, in this instance the children stuck in the fire, their only answer is to start shooting things. Because they have no other answer than state sanctioned violence. And they did this all with an episode about FUCKING WEASEL!

Now, imagine what they can do with Superman. It doesn't even have to be political, like these previous examples. However, to me, this shows that he can do what, to me, some of the best storytellers do. They weave every element of their story together with deliberate choices that strengthen each other. If anything, more than any well edited trailer, it is that that excites me about everything James is working on. Of course, he is doing this with a team, but James is the type to surround himself with smart people who understand these things inside and out. That one David Corenswet quote about the shorts proves that to me in shades. That's what gives me hope about these works. That they will be movies and shows that mean things. Which seems like a low bar, but hey, so many fail at it that it's kind of impressive.

[togglesbloggle]

🔥The ice giants

Oh, this one's tricky. Do people have strong enough feelings about the ice giants for opinions about them to be unpopular? Even NASA doesn't care enough about them to send a spacecraft more than once in a blue moon. I think I'll try to weasel out of this one with the opinion 'all planets are interesting, even Neptune,' on the grounds that uninterestingness is itself the dominant opinion.

The midcentury explorations of the solar system were, in retrospect, kind of crushing for the human imagination. We went from totally unbounded speculations about the diversity of worlds- imagining robust ecosystems on Venus and Mars as late as the 50s and early 60s- to a series of photographs showing cratered, dead, atmosphere-less worlds. And 'realism' became accepting these photographs, building a story of the cosmos that is not just sterile but quite simple, treating the solar system as conforming closely to low-complexity models of planetary formation. Gravity collects micrometeorites and gas particles in planetoids and moons according to the ratios predicted by temperature and distance from the center of the accretion disk; terrestrial worlds close in, gas giants further out, ice giants further still. The planets sort themselves by density, with interior deformation or sortition based on thermal gradients, radioactive decay, magnetic forces; moons find a stable orbit or don't, and that's that.

But the thing is, once you actually get past that superficial Voyager flyby-photograph, these worlds all tend to have dramatic and exciting particularities of their own. Look at Pluto! Look at Titan! Look at Enceladus! Look at Ceres! Probably the most boring and well-studied planet I can think of is Mercury, and even that has cool stuff like solid ice at the surface.

Part of this is just noticing over time that the interface between planets and space (that is, their surface) is not always or even usually the most interesting part of them, and assumptions to the contrary are an understandable but misleading form of Earth-chauvinism.

And a larger share of it, I think, is just that once you get something substantially larger than an asteroid, the combined influence of so much volume, so much mass, and so much time just tends to amplify the variance of your system incredibly far beyond what you'd expect from your 'terrestrial, gas giant, ice giant' template. The model is actionably useful, don't get me wrong, and worlds rarely vary so much that they outright break their category. But nothing the size of a moon or planet is actually simple, and nothing on the scale of four billion years is actually stable. And so each of these things, no matter how straightforward the template, will gradually tilt and totter its way within an unfathomably large space of possibilities to something that is practically speaking unique, and which reveals something new about the cosmos that you can't find anywhere else.

If the ice giants seem simple, it's a reflection of our methods and our technological limits, not the planets themselves. We are, generally speaking, absolutely terrible about investigating gaseous worlds on their own terms- and maybe we simply don't have the right tools or the right questions yet to figure out what makes Neptune and Uranus special. But it's only a matter of time.

[acciofictionalmen]

lust life - SIRIUS BLACK

(sirius black x female!reader)

summary: you've been hooking up with james potter over the summer, but when you return to hogwarts you find yourself drawn to his best friend. you've adamantly hated sirius black throughout your school years, and you're sure the feeling's mutual... or you were

warnings: sexual references, strong & suggestive language, description of injuries including blood, cuts and bruises, 14+

other parts:

PART 1

PART 2

PART 3 (current)

PART THREE

The bold red and gold letters were unbearably obnoxious- something like this had Gryffindor written all over it. The bright colours were in stark contrast with the dark greens and black tones of the Slytherin common room. You didn't even have to walk up to the noticeboard to read the massive words plastered across.

'INTER-HOUSE PARTY

WHERE : gryffindor common room

WHEN : friday

TIME : 10 PM

(any snitches will be hexed- courtesy of Sirius Black)

You scoffed at the last part, looking around. no-one seemed to be particularly interested and neither were you.

Upon closer look, you saw rips and tears on the sides of the poster. Whoever had placed it there must have used a permanent sticking charm to prevent anyone from taking it down.

You left the room, rolling your eyes.

On the way to detention you stared aimlessly at your feet whilst you walked, completely submerged in your thoughts. A certain gryffindor boy weaseled his way into your mind. Sirius Black- the reason that you were currently headed to Filch's office on a day when you could be doing Charms homework, or spending time with your friends instead.

So when you felt a hand on your shoulder you spun around so suddenly you almost tripped over your feet. Two strong arms held you steady, as you met a familiar pair of green eyes.

"James?" You asked quizzically, glancing around to see if anyone was looking, "What happened to making sure no one saw us together?"

Still chuckling at how startled you had been, he quickly ushered you into a broom cupboard. You were fairly certain a second year had witnessed the two of you do so.

After the amused look on his face had finally faded away, the both of you just stared at eachother awkwardly. Just as you were about to ask why he was making you late to detention, James took a deep breath.

"I have feelings for Lily." He blurted out.

You weren't sure what you'd been expecting him to say, but it definitely wasn't that. You stared at him for a second, confused about the momentary wave of relief that washed over you.

James looked at you uncertainly, unsure of how you'd react. You'd suspected for a while. A long time, actually. And James' feelings for Lily Evans simply didn't bother you. Perhaps because you had known your time together was coming to an end anyway; the passion the two of you used to have was gradually ebbing away. The boy opposite you jumped as you began to speak, knocking the dusty cleansweep by his arm onto the floor with a loud clatter.

"Cool." You shrugged, "It was fun while it lasted Potter." And you left, leaving James in the dark with a pleasantly surprised look on his face.

It contorted into one of shock as Remus slipped in not even seconds after you'd left.

He looked sickly pale. His footsteps were small, and he moved slowly.

"Erm.." James sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck, "Shouldn't you be resting, Moony?"

But Remus ignored him, "(Y/n)? Really? Out of all people- the one person your best friend despises?" Despite his weakened state, Remus defiantly crossed his arms, "Don't you think he deserves to know?" But James had already stepped out of the cupboard, and was lingering by the open door.

He gestured to his friend's frail figure, "You need to be resting, it isn't healthy for you to be up, especially not when it's almost time." He paused, "And anyways, it's over." James shrugged, "It was just a fling, and now we're going our separate ways."

"Are you sure Sirius will see it that way?" Remus inquired knowingly, but James had already left.

⚜

"Your wand, (L/n)." Filch snapped, snatching it the second you pulled it out of your robes. You raised a hand towards the doorknob hesitantly, the grime on it so thick that what you imagined had used to be a shimmering gold, was now a dull grey.

Filch glared, "What're you waiting for then?"

The caretaker's threatening glare encouraged you to open the door and enter. Filch immediately closed the door behind you. As you grudgingly looked around the room, it became clear that it must've been used for storage. Boxes were stacked up the walls, the air was stale, and the only source of light came from the full-moon which illuminatined the room through a large, floor length window opposite.

You groaned, checking the likely broken clock on the wall. Black was late, which wasn't suprising, but you knew that to clean this place without magic you'd need an extra pair of hands.

Heading to the moudly cardboard box closest to the door, you opened it up, coughing as dust billowed in your face. The contents seemed to be random trinkets that didn't have any practical function. Great, you thought to yourself, setting to work.

An hour passed. 9 pm. Black still hadn't turned up.

As time slipped by, not only had you finally realised that Black wasn't going to come, but also that Filch had locked you in.

The room was pitch black by the time Filch opened the door. Mrs Norris stalked inside as Filch took a look around, candle held high. Once he was satisfied with the cleanliness of the room he gestured for you to leave, reluctantly handing back your wand as you did so.

The hallways were dark and quiet. Even the portraits' inhabitants were asleep as you headed back to the Slytherin common room. You were exhausted, covered in dust and grime with aching limbs, but only one thing was on your mind.

The fact that Black had bunked that definition made you almost shake in anger. It was now midnight. You had spent four hours cleaning that room, and the person who had gotten you into the situation couldn't even be bothered to show up. Engulfed in spite and bitterness, you didn't notice the person ahead until you crashed into them.

"Sorry." You grumbled, prepared to walk past when you suddenly realised who it was.

"(L/n)?" Sirius Black stuttered in shock, as your wide eyes took in his appearance.

His hair was matted, and stuck to the sweat beaded on his forehead. A deep gash was just above his cheekbone; red glittered his face.

You stumbled backwards, hand shakily rising to your mouth, "Oh-- oh my god--"

Black looked at a loss for words, "I-- uh--"

"We've got to take you to Madam Pomfrey," you stated urgently, all previous anger dissipated in an instant, "you stay here, I'll go get--"

"No!" Black snapped, causing you to jump. His eyes were bloodshot, and were full of such a desperation that you had never seen before. Then, in a much more subdued and pleading tone, "She can't--" He rubbed his forehead, and you noticed his hands were coated in blood, "--no one can know."

You hesitated.

"No one." He emphasised, still tense, unsure whether you'd make a run for it or not.

Shaking your head in disbelief, your mind snapped into action, "Fine. Come with me."

Taking his elbow, you began to lead him away.

"(L/n) I don't have the time--"

You stopped so abruptly that Black crashed into your back.

"Listen to me," You faced him, eyes practically blazing, "You are going to come with me, and I am going to help you because I swear to god I refuse to be the one responsible if you're discovered tomorrow morning dead." Your breathing was heavy with adrenaline as he stared back at you silently.

"Okay?!" You snapped without meeting his eyes, immediately beginning to tug him again.

"Okay!" He said exasperatedly, "but it won't help if you tear my bloody arm off!"

"I ought to do just that after you left me in a four hour detention to clean up some disgusting room by myself." Ignoring his protests and unsympathetic apologies, you pulled him inside a room you often frequented, but with a different boy.

"Is this the prefect's bathroom?" Black raised an eyebrow as you pushed him down onto the toilet seat. Ever since you and James started having regular meet-ups, he had given you the password to enter the Prefect's Bathrooms. Apparently it hadn't been changed yet.

You nodded, quickly wetting a tissue and wiping off the blood from his face before taking out your wand. Black sank into silence as you worked, but his pained expression and sharp intakes of breath whenever you dabbed at a cut didn't escape your notice.

Brushing aside a few strands of hair stuck to his forehead, you murmured "Episkey!"

And the gash on his cheekbone quickly closed up.

"Where'd you learn that?" Black asked in awe, absentmindedly running a hair through his thick hair.

"Just because you don't pay attention during Charms doesn't mean everyone else doesn't." You stated, looking up briefly from rolling up his trouser. He had leaned back with a wolfish grin on his face, and you briefly revelled in how someone could look so handsome so effortlessly, before snapping back to your senses.

"Immature prick." You sighed, moving your hands down to the bottom of his shirt. It was soaked in blood. Peeling it up cautiously, you bit the inside of your cheek as you saw the wounds littering his abdomen.

"Didn't realise you were so eager to undress me," He smirked, as you instantly withdrew your hands in disgust.

"Can you not give it a rest for one second ?!" You snapped.

From then on he stayed silent, opting instead to rest his head against the cold wall and close his eyes. You began to murmur charms, working on each open wound until most of them were gone. The deeper ones would inevitably scar. His smooth skin felt warm against your fingers, and you observed how his muscles tensed whenever you accidentally brushed against them.

You began to wish you hadn't said anything.

After a few more anxious minutes, you sat back. There would definitely be some bruises the next day, but without a professional healer there was really nothing that could be done.

The silence was so prominent between the two of you, and your thoughts so loud, that you began to wonder whether he in fact could hear them. But Black made no semblance of opening his eyes or moving, and you wondered whether he really had fallen asleep. You cleared your throat to let him know you'd finished.

His dark eyes fluttered open, and you stared at the bruises forming under his eyes. Without much thought, you lifted your fingertips and brushed his right eyelid. Whatever had happened, it was no normal courtyard fight. These injuries had to be supernatural.

"I'm sorry." You whispered finally, fingers dropping as you began to tap them against the cold tiles on the floor.

He stared intensely, and you struggled not to squirm.

"I don't mind it when you touch me." He said bluntly, causing you to get flustered.

"No-- I meant--"

Sirius Black looked as though he could laugh, causing you to descend into an ashamed silence as he spoke, "Oh about yesterday? I deserved it I--"

"--about what happened at the Malfoy's." You interrupted, finally making eye contact, "I didn't know."

He stayed silent, but Sirius' grey eyes resembled a storm, the emotion so prevalent you found yourself lost in in them. His eyes bore into yours as you sat there, with bated breath, unsure whether he understood to what you were referring.

"I judged you. Unfairly. Just like Elizabeth did to Darcy..." You trailed off, cringing at what you had just said- internal monologue was internal for a reason.

Besides, he had likely forgotten and was probably wondering if you'd had too much pumpkin juice to drink during lunch.

You attempted to salvage your apology, "At the Chrismas ball, in the--""

"--in the broom cupboard." He almost smiled, eyes twinkling as he remembered your first proper encounter. As though it was a happy memory shared between two childhood friends.

"I'm sorry." You repeated, and he smiled so broadly, radiantly, that you couldn't help but blush, cheeks aching as you both began to laugh.

⚜

Everything seemed to shift. Much to the majority of Hogwarts' students' shock, you and Sirius began to be civil to one another. You exchanged smiles when passing in the corridor, you laughed when he pulled a prank in class, you even walked to Potions with him at the beginning of third period the following day. People couldn't seem to believe that a Gryffindor and a Slytherin who had despised eachother for years had suddenly begun to exchange niceties.

When Friday finally came around, Serafina couldn't contain her suspicions. Fully aware of what the gossips in Hogwarts could be like, she hadn't wanted to offend you by believing the talk of the school. You hadn't yet told her about what had happened that day - only about you and James breaking it off - and so she was desperate to know what had changed between you and Sirius.

Eyes practically shining as the two of you sat underneath the large oak tree in the courtyard, you started to explain everything that had happened when Sera cleared her throat. Her eyes were focused curiously on something behind you.

Turning around, you grinned as you saw Sirius nearing you.

You waved as he stopped roughly a metre away from you. He didn't return it.

Lowering your hand slowly, you noticed something had changed in his demeanour.

All of a sudden James was at his side, out of breath as though he had been running, eyes wide in...

fear?

"Don't do this mate," He began to beg uselessly, as you glanced around in confusion, students had begun to gather around, "She didn't--"

"Tell me." He began in a low voice, as James looked at anywhere but you, "for how long exactly you've been fucking my best friend."

hi loves!

i had so much fun writing this chapter! hope you enjoyed reading it as much as i did writing<33

as always, i'd love to hear your thoughts<3

taglist ;

@cumslutforaemond @blackst0nes7077 @s0vval @starsval @ttulipwritezz @xreaderbooksreads @thewiselionessfantasy @willows-lane @kieyriez

___

these works are the property of acciofictionalmen

all written content is mine, do not steal, plagiarise, or publish any of my works without my permission

[dreamsofbroflovski]

Tolkien Black x Reader - sky's the limit

Also available on ao3!

Summary: You spend the New Year's Eve the only way you want to - in the arms of your favourite person.

Warnings: Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content (everyone involved is above the age of consent), Penis In Vagina Sex, Semi-Public Sex, Wall Sex, Mentions of Alcohol & Drug Usage

A/N: Story of how this came to be: I was listening to Rich Sex by Nicki Minaj ft. Lil Wayne. Then I thought of Tolkien. My brain short-circuited and before I noticed I had like five paragraphs written.

Figured I might as well write a NYE fic then, because I really liked the concept and Tolkien desperately needs more love.

Also, third fic in a row with the 'Semi-Public Sex' tag? What is happeninggggg

It was December 31st, 2024. Still another hour or so until midnight, judging by the 90’’ TV screen on the living room wall, which had been for a while now displaying a countdown to the New Year - a livestream for the Times Square ball drop, so a whole bunch of adults in bumfuck Colorado could go absolutely berserk over an event happening all the way on the other side of the country. Which didn’t even mean much, considering my friends would crash out over damn near anything.

The TV wasn’t the focus of anyone’s attention at that moment; most people around were either dancing their soul away to the crazy beats the DJ had cooked up, threading the line between ‘making out’ and ‘blatant exhibitionism’’ on some corner - or, if they had enough decency, in one of the apartment’s bedrooms -, or getting drunk/high off their marbles to start the new year on a good note. The few folk who still attempted normal conversation needed to do so really loudly, which only added to the cacophony overwhelming everyone’s senses. 

More due to being tired of his friends’ constant begging than out of any real interest to do so, my boyfriend Tolkien had rented out an entire penthouse for New Year’s Eve and the day right after, also forking out the money for a decent party at the place. It was supposed to just be people we knew - which was already a lot, considering our friends -, but the whole thing got so big and so out of control that even people from neighboring towns were coming to attend, and every broken thing or mess I stumbled upon made me wince and sigh out of respect for my partner’s wallet.

That’s not to say it was a shitty party. It was wild, yes, but awesome. Music was blasting, drinks were flowing freely, everyone seemed to be in their best vibes and no fights had broken out yet - which was always a plus. I was having a great time, and, from the glimpses I caught of him around the packed place, Tolkien was too. We didn’t spend much of that time actually together, but I saw him here and there mingling with our common friends, usually looking relaxed and laughing at some joke, a different glass in his hand each time. He would never be able to get all of his money’s worth, but he wouldn’t be able to say he hated all of it, either.

However, even though I was enjoying it all, sometimes a girl needs a break. Being a very involved member of the ‘party planning committee’ - a role basically forced upon me due to being the host’s girlfriend -, I had already spent some energy trying to put it all together, so I admit I might’ve gotten myself tired a bit earlier than everyone else. Not a problem, though - I just needed to take a breather, maybe some water, allow my eardrums to calm down a little before they got permanent damage from the pounding music, and then I’d be back in action without any trouble. So I weaseled myself out of yet another drinking game someone had come up with and made my way to the penthouse’s huge balcony.

In a surprising change of pace for our little mountain town, on that particular New Year’s Eve, it hadn’t snowed. Still that didn’t mean respite from the stinging winter breezes, as I had come to find when they passed right through the thin layer of my pantyhose, making me shiver basically as soon as I stepped outside. I lectured myself mentally for not having thought of it and for prioritizing a cute outfit instead of comfort and warmth, but in my defense, I figured I’d spend the whole time inside of the apartment where it was warmer anyways, so more protection wasn’t needed.

I pushed through the uncomfortable sensation, focusing on the warmth provided by my coat and the other layers of my outfit, and it soon subsided. My feet slowly traversed the area of the terrace, while my eyes took in the well-decorated environment that was still fairly untouched by our friends’ disastrous behaviour - at least until one of them was drunkenly dared to hang out naked outside, which was bound to happen eventually. 

Without even noticing, I had made my way to the farthest end of the balcony, a more dimly-lit area, that had no doors leading directly to it and no large windows overseeing it either. There were few decorations - a coffee table, some armchairs around it, big potted plants just like the others spread throughout the outside area of the penthouse. I ignored all of that, heading towards the railing and leaning against it; that specific part of the railing was fairly tall and made of concrete, hitting just under my chest, in a way that I could comfortably put my weight on it to look down at the city without fear of anything breaking.

For a while, the booming bass of the music and the loud voices inside of the apartment became dull noise as I watched the buildings below, places that I had visited the whole year and that impacted my life so greatly, now looking like my personal Lego city as I saw them from high up. The more commercial parts of town were almost entirely plunged into darkness, only the lampposts and some colorful lights from the most recent Christmas a testament that something actually happened in those areas. So my eyes drifted naturally to the residential regions, which were way more lively; lots of houses had their lights on, their inhabitants surely preparing for a great year, channeling that excitement either in the form of a simple family gathering or a loud boisterous party much like the one I was currently in.

“Ah, there you are. I was wondering about you.”

And just like that, I was taken away from my dream-like state by a gentle male voice - but that did not bother me at all. I had a soft smile on my face as I turned to face Tolkien, who walked slowly towards me with his hands in his pockets and returned my smile in kind.

Despite having already spent time together earlier, I couldn’t help but study his whole body up and down as he approached, taking in his whole outfit with great interest. A beige Burberry trench coat covered up the upper half of his body, ending about at the middle of his thighs, fully closed. The black trousers were also Burberry, but no different than any other run-of-the-mill pants to the untrained eye; the only thing that made them slightly different was a small embroidered design above one of the back pockets - which I only knew existed because I had taken that very same garment off of Tolkien’s body numerous times and watched him put it back on later. The charcoal grey scarf neatly wrapped around his neck had the LV monogram patterned all over it, clearly visible in its contrast even in the darkness of the late night. I couldn’t even begin to remember the brands of his shoes, his belt or his watch, the names sounding too expensive for me when he first told me, like one of those exclusive things that doesn’t even reach the ears of the common folk. Only his whole current ensemble was already more expensive than the full outfits of all the other guests combined, and he wore it like it was nothing.

I always greatly appreciated the way that he dressed. Not because it was all expensive and I liked to be seen with a rich guy, mind you; Tolkien could wear a potato sack and I’d still stare at him like the most perfect sculpture. It was the fact that, under all that expensive wrapping, the real gift was for my eyes only, complete perfection that was irrevocably mine.

The only thing currently getting in the way of that perfection was a pair of flimsy plastic glasses, a staple at NYE parties, according to whatever idiot it was that bought them. The damn things were neon yellow, glowed in the dark, and had ‘2025’ on top of the hollow circles that were the actual glasses. Apparently our friends couldn’t find the version that made the 0 and the second 2 the ‘eye’ part of the design - and thank God for that, or else I don’t think I could’ve kept my face straight for as long as I did while looking at Tolkien.

My boyfriend stopped right beside me and we both exchanged a loving glance at each other before our gazes returned to the town spreading below us. “I just needed a bit of fresh air. You know how it is.” I shrugged.

“So you chose to come outside where it’s freezing,” Tolkien retorted in light-hearted mockery, his arm making its way over my shoulders and pulling me closer against his side, that hand running up and down my arm as if trying to create extra heat over my coat. “So much for ‘fresh’.”

“At least now I get to be close to you like this.” I chuckled, leaning towards him and twisting the end of his scarf lazily on my index finger. “I see Clyde sold you out on the ugly-ass glasses.”

Tolkien’s eyes widened and his other hand quickly flew to his face, tearing away the colorful piece of plastic and throwing it over his shoulder as if it was toxic, his expression shifting into one of embarrassment at being caught wearing such a ridiculous object. “I’m sorry you had to witness that.” He mumbled, slightly dejected.

I laughed and wrapped my arms sideways around his waist. “It’s alright, I still love you.”

My answer was enough for him to lose his mortification and smile once more, turning his face towards me briefly to plant a kiss to the top of my head. He then turned to watch the buildings again, his expression much more peaceful - and beautiful, which he always was, but more so now that he had ditched the terrible party accessory.

“But hey, you’re outside,” I shot him a curious look, “Why’s that?”

“Needed some fresh air too,” it was his time to shrug, ”And wanted to at least try to enjoy the view. You know, the one I paid for?”

There was no arguing with that. For the guy that was paying for the whole thing, he surely didn’t get to enjoy most of the penthouse’s amenities before our friends completely trashed it, and we weren’t sure he’d have much patience for it the next day. “It is a very nice view, though,” I commented, “Probably the best I’ve ever seen.”

I heard the tiny ruffling of Tolkien’s scarf as he shook his head. “I’ve seen better.”

“Oh yeah?” I rolled my eyes jokingly. “What was it? Greece, Thailand, the Bahamas?”

“No, no, and no.” Every word of his negative was punctuated by a light tap of his index finger on my shoulder. “Right here in South Park, actually.”

A huff of disbelief left my mouth. “Baby, I think the alcohol is getting to you.”

He turned his whole body towards me and brought his hands to my shoulders, pushing them slightly so I was physically coaxed into facing him as well. “You don’t believe me?”

“It isn’t that I don’t,” I explained, “But you’ve travelled a lot, Tolkien. Surely someplace must look better than the middle of nowhere in America itself.”

“I don’t remember mentioning a place.”

The intensity of his gaze towards me, the sheer adoration in it, told me what words hadn’t yet. I felt my face getting hotter, internally thanking the dim lighting that might provide me with some sort of cover for the red tint that certainly spread in my cheeks. It was unbelievable - Tolkien and I had been together for a while, he had called me all the good adjectives in the dictionary by now, and still made me blush like a damn teenager every single time with his praise.

“You’re the best sight I’ll ever get to see,” one of his hands came to cup my cheek while the other tilted my chin slightly up, “I don’t really need to be anywhere else, if I can just have you by my side.”

“Well, I already am,” my voice was roughly more than a whisper, the low volume making both of us lean closer so I could be heard, “And I’ll always be. I’m yours, Tolkien.”

My lips met his halfway, closing the gap in a tender kiss, almost innocent as it started, letting our bodies cool down from the still present party energy and bringing us to focus on the serene aspects of our affection towards each other. Tolkien’s hands dropped to my waist as he realized he didn’t need to keep my face in position anymore, stroking up and down the sides of my body, making me wish I wasn’t wearing so many layers to keep warm just so I could feel his touch directly on me. 

When my arms wrapped around his neck and I tilted my face a bit, we both understood those moves for the invitation they were to deepen the kiss, and he sighed against my mouth as he pressed his lips on mine with more insistence. I felt the taste of the champagne on his tongue as it brushed against mine in a languid dance, and found myself yearning for more of that flavor, drinking it like it was the real beverage; I was a complete lightweight when it came to anything Tolkien.

What to me was heading out to be just a sweet couple of kisses quickly took a turn when my boyfriend swiftly pushed me and had my back hitting the railing. My legs instinctively spread apart to keep myself stable and he immediately claimed that space in the middle of them, rolling his hips against mine with our bodies pressed together. His lips started tracing a path over my jawline and down my neck with small kisses - making sure to get that tiny spot behind my ear that never failed to make my breath hitch -, getting to their destination on the crook of my neck, where tiny nips and suckles were added to the mix of his affectionate caresses on my body.

“Here?” A curious chuckle left my mouth as I inquired, though there was not a hint of anger or shame in my voice - it was more the fact that, in all of the time I knew him, Tolkien was always one to prefer the peace and quiet of four walls and a locked door for his more intimate displays of affection, instead of the open air and the sight of the wide sky like the situation we were in now. Being public like this, in a place full of people where anyone could simply walk outside for long enough and catch us, was unusual; but I wasn’t about to really complain.

“All the rooms are full already. I checked,” he stopped his assault on my neck for a moment to pull back slightly and give me a pleading look that could melt even the iciest of hearts, “Please, honey?”

There was no way I was going to deny the owner of those magnificent mahogany eyes anything he ever wanted in life, not when he looked at me like that, like I held the whole firmament that spread above us. I tilted my head away from him to expose my neck more in silent permission for him to continue working on it. “Hm, so you were planning for this.”

“And if I was?” Tolkien smirked, leaning forward and putting his mouth to my neck again, his grip on my waist tightening, “Can’t blame a man for wanting to be with his girlfriend instead of with a bunch of jerks on a beautiful night like this, can you?”

I really couldn’t, especially when said girlfriend also wanted to be with her man, and had the fast heartbeat to prove it. So instead I had my hands do the talking by letting them drift all over the front part of his trenchcoat, skilled fingers opening the buttons and the belt on it to make the work easier for my boyfriend. He helped me out by putting a bit of distance between our bodies so I could actually move my hands between us, but was flush against me again as soon as the last button was loose, pressing me insistently against the concrete railing.

His hand slid under my skirt, taking its time as it glided over my thighs in a velvety caress before making its way between them. One harsh tug at the thin fabric was enough for Tolkien to tear a hole through the crotch of my tights, then a few more for that hole to stretch wider and give him easier access to my still clothed core.

“I’ll buy you another pair,” he said as if reading my mind, his fingers now hooking under my panties to bring them aside and out of his way, “Just don’t want you to be cold.”

“What a gentleman.” It was only half of a jest - he truly was one.

Underwear now out of the way too, there was nothing separating my most sensitive area from my boyfriend’s loving touch. Two of his fingers traced my slit, spreading my arousal all over it, his sensual motions like fuel to the intense warmth that had built on my lower abdomen and was slowly spreading through my whole body. Tolkien brought his right hand around my left thigh and pulled it up so my leg was resting against his hip, leaving my other leg planted on the ground. My hands held onto his shoulders for stability, thumbs instinctively rubbing caresses he couldn’t physically feel over his thick coat but undoubtedly made its way to his heart. 

Seeing me in that position and completely open for him, he was quick to pull himself off from inside his pants - but I didn’t even have time to appreciate that beautiful cock of his with my eyes before he got into position and pushed it to the hilt inside of me, filling me up completely in one move, a hiss of pleasure leaving his mouth at the same time as a yelp of surprise and slight pain left mine. Such speed was another unusual occurrence; Tolkien was normally much more gentle when we made love, he liked to take his time and really feel me stretching around him.

My pain-like reaction was immediately noticed by my partner, and his wide-eyed worried gaze shot up to my face. “Everything alright, baby?”

“Yes, yes, I’m fine,” my reassurance was accompanied by a deep sigh of relief on his part, “Just… Sudden.”

Tolkien nodded, pressing his forehead against mine. “Sorry,” he whispered, “It’s just… the cold, you know.”

I nodded emphatically, understanding his worry. If there was one thing I didn’t want right now, it was to be cock-blocked by Mother Nature.

He allowed himself to stay like this for a while, placing various quick yet luscious pecks to my mouth in succession, enjoying the sensation of my warmth enveloping him completely, and letting me adjust to his throbbing length as well. Then the arm he had around my thigh wrapped tighter as he started to move in slow, deep thrusts; his free hand roaming over my clothed body, tracing curves he couldn’t properly see but already knew completely by heart. He started off gentle, his cock massaging my walls with kindness, eyes fixated on mine, gauging my every reaction and letting his body transform the immensely positive feedback into motivation for him to keep going.

Small clouds would leave both our mouths with each exhale - the chemical phenomenon giving physical form to the lustful mist that slowly clouded both my mind and his, protecting us from the environment and also making us hyper-aware of our connection and every sensation related to each other’s touch. I could feel all the veins in his thick length imprinting my walls, my cunt the exact perfect shape for him, as if tailor-made. With every movement, he had his cock pressing against the sweet spot inside of me - it took everything I had for me to not brace myself and beg for him to take me hard and fast, because I still wanted to be with him, to savor that moment, to have it last.

In a surprising move, his hands left my body for a brief moment so he could hurriedly shed his coat and scarf, letting them fall to the floor without a care. Underneath that layer, he was wearing a navy blue Armani dress shirt - which I, completely disregarding his comfort or protection against the weather, undid the remaining closed buttons of as well, letting my nails lightly rake his toned torso as it was bare in front of me. Tolkien didn’t even shudder as the cold hit his now much less protected body, and I fully understood why; between the two of us, we were generating enough heat to make the whole building think it was summer.

“You look beautiful tonight.” I murmured tenderly, letting my hand stop splayed on the left side of his chest, right over his racing heart.

“You look beautiful always.” His eyes fluttered almost closed as he picked up speed on his thrusts, instinctively responding to my soft touch on his skin.

Whines of pleasure left my mouth more frequently with this new pace that chased the perfect middle ground between sweet lovemaking and rough fucking - a middle ground that Tolkien was always capable of achieving and that always had me running back for more of him. I was getting louder and louder every time, taking full advantage of the blaring music from the party, which prevented anyone else from hearing us and coming outside to check. My sounds seemed to reach Tolkien’s brain loud and clear, though, as he brought his face to my ear and started whispering lovely words of praise, his warm breath making the fine hairs behind my neck stand with the goosebumps it created.

In time, we both started to lose our senses of self in favor of pleasure, my arms wrapping around Tolkien’s neck as I tried to melt his body into mine and make us one whole thing. He, on the other hand, was throwing more and more of his caution off the penthouse railing - the sweet nothings he murmuring into my hair turning into slurred curse words I hardly ever heard him use, but that seemed to come naturally to him in that particular moment. The arm he had wrapped around my thigh brought my leg even higher against the side of his body, using the extra space and the slightly different position to pound harder against me; his other hand found itself on the almost non-existent space between our hips, sneaking down to my clit and skillfully rubbing circles on the sensitive nub. Immediately I felt like the whole sky had been brought down to me, breathy moans in quick succession trying to use up all the air in the atmosphere - I was getting dizzy on the way he made me feel so good, logical thought being replaced with utter need for him.

With the new stimulation, I was clenching harder than ever around Tolkien’s cock, and his body responded to all of my touches like it was all just an extension of the most sensitive areas of him, even though he was almost fully covered. I could feel his whole body tensing between my legs, against my thigh, under my arms, every part that he had against me was threatening to snap. His thrusts were all over the place and erratic, and he grunted with gritted teeth like he was one breath away from losing all control. Yet he held on to it for dear life, inhaling sharply as if he wanted the cold air to freeze him so he could last just a little bit longer - if there was one thing about my boyfriend, it was that he refused to cum until I did. 

Not that it would take too long for that. I tugged at Tolkien’s hair, pulling his head away from my neck so that he was directly facing me. His eyes were glazed off, almost completely gone, portals to his blissful mind.

“Tolkien… aaaah… I’m… I’m…” 

Proper words were starting to get lost on me as I tiptoed the edge of my orgasm. Yet, I still found it in me to say, right after, the only ones that would be on my heart no matter the situation as long as I was with him: “I love you…”

“I love you too, honey,” his voice was low and rough with his passion, “So… So much…”

And that simple expression overpowered me. I threw my head back, letting it dangle over the railing as my climax set my whole body ablaze, mouth opening wide in a moan of my lover’s name that was probably heard across the whole state. Opening my eyes and staring directly at the night sky, I saw every single star as close as they could be to my body, their very energy coursing through my skin like countless sparks. Even if thousands of light years away, the whole galaxy was etched deep into my very soul, and yet it was a mere atom in comparison to the size of my love for Tolkien.

I stopped hearing his harsh breathing during the whole time utter pleasure was flashing through me; granted, I didn’t hear much of anything at that moment, but I just knew he was watching my face with thorough veneration as I came. Then both of Tolkien’s arms wrapped around my body with an extremely protective squeeze as his body leaned towards mine instead of away, his hips stuttering frantically towards mine - the sight of my face in utmost pleasure and my walls tightening around him always managed to have him done for, and his release came almost immediately after. While he emptied himself inside of me, his head was hanging over my shoulder, face down, looking towards the streets and buildings dozens of meters below us. 

“Wow, we are so high up right now,” I heard Tolkien murmur with a slightly surprised tone to it, as if he had just been made aware of where exactly we were, despite us having taken in the view before. He was trembling slightly, half aftershocks and half a natural discomfort at the height. “It’s so cool.”

The chuckle that left my mouth with his comment was lazy, mirroring the completely spent state of my body. “So you’re sold on this being the best view ever now?”

He made a hum of disagreement, and when he spoke again, I could almost hear his smile. “Still not. But I guess I had forgotten about what was top 2.”

I knew where this was going, but, in my still slightly lust-drunk mind, I decided I wanted him to say it. “Which was…”

“Your face when you cum,” There it is, I thought to myself as he answered, “Absolutely gorgeous.”

Tolkien slowly straightened his posture, bringing my upper body along with him, his arms loosening around my body but still keeping me close. His cock was now softening inside of me, keeping all of his essence plugged in, filling me up with a type of warmth that had both everything and nothing to do with the hot seed that painted my walls.

When he pulled back a bit and my eyes scanned his satisfied features, I finally saw it - tiny specks of white now peppered his dark hair, creating a sharp contrasting image which definitely wasn’t there before. I lifted one of my hands to his head and gently brushed some of them away, the edges of my eyesight capturing Tolkien’s confused expression for a brief moment.

“It’s snowing,” I explained, hearing a hum of acknowledgement from him shortly after. He echoed my movements with one of his own hands, ghosting over my hair and shoulder, clearing me off of small ice crystals I couldn’t see.

“We should go back inside then,” he gestured with his head towards the penthouse, “We don’t wanna be here if it gets any worse.”

My head moved in a nod of agreement. Now that I didn’t have the fire of lust running through my veins anymore, I was made too aware of how the weather had gotten worse, and we really didn’t need the most intimate parts of us exposed to the harsh cold. We had to separate, make ourselves presentable again, and go back inside the apartment so I could rush to the bathroom before Tolkien’s release could create questionable stains on my ruined pantyhose.

However, despite acknowledging the discomfort of our bodies and the compromising position we were in, despite saying with all the words that we had to leave, none of us made a move. Tolkien was now completely soft, his arms had dropped their hold completely on my body to just let his hands rest on my hips. Yet my left leg was still wrapped around his waist, keeping me in the same position I was when we were making love, keeping the energy of our little escapade physically present with us for just a while longer in the form of that contact. We both distracted ourselves by looking up for a while, the twinkle of the stars present in our eyes, happy and serene.

“Honey?” Tolkien suddenly brought my attention back to him with a warm callout, the volume of his voice still low.

My eyes immediately went to him again. “Hm?”

“I love you.”

Even though my heart was soaring like it always did whenever he said that to me, I still let out an amused chuckle. “You already said that.”

“What’s wrong with saying it again?” one of his hands went to nudge my shoulder in a playful manner. “It’s true!”

“I know, I know.” The hand I had on his hair drifted down to his face, my silk-like touch caressing his cheek. “And I love you too, Tolkien.”

As he poured all those sweet words into my body with a passionate kiss, my resolution for the New Year was made, even though it had already long been completed. I’d spend every day of my life letting this love flow through my body, with Tolkien right next to me, making every single minute perfect for us.

Dividers by @cafekitsune

[tootiecakes234]

@queenpiranhadon thank you so much for adding me to this writing event😇 it’s my very first one and I’m so glad to be apart of working with all these amazing people.

Syn: Kento’s wife finds out he’s been hit by a curse and turned into a frog. Only true love’s kiss can cure him.

I hope this story does the idea in my head justice.

This is supposed to be romance/comedy I guess… Enjoy😘😘

*also my longest story to date

It’s been months since you’ve been back to the home where you’d grown up. It’s gotten harder and harder to find the time between teaching your students and exercising curses.

But you and your husband always made time every year to make sure you got back during Mardi Gras.

See you came from New Orleans, Louisiana and you left home your last year of high school to attend jujutsu high. It was the top school for learning to use your cursed technique so you’d jumped on the opportunity when it presented itself.

This led to you meeting your husband, Nanami Kento and also one of the amazing friends you’d made Satoru Gojo.

Mentioning Gojo now because to Kento’s dismay, he’d weaseled his way into this trip. His entire reason for going, being the if he didn’t get to try the beignets from New Orleans, he would simply pass away.

Kento questioned everyday, how he’d managed to fall in love with Satoru’s best friend. It was the only hesitation he had when it came to dating you in the beginning because he knew he would be stuck with Gojo for life… And here he was in the cab with you guys on the way to your dad’s restaurant.

“ have I mentioned how much I love America. There’s a sweet shop on every corner we’ve passed. I’m gonna go into a diabetic shock.”, Satoru said from the left side of you.

Under his breath you heard Kento mutter, “Sounds good to me” and you elbowed him softly.

The two of them had been bickering since you’d met up at the airport in Japan. You weren’t gonna make it the whole trip without at least a few headaches.

“So it’s the first day of Mardi Gras and I know the restaurants gonna be super busy so what are you guys going to do to keep yourselves entertained while I’m working in the kitchen with my dad?” You asked them.

“Well I figured we would have lunch at the restaurant first and go from there. At some point, I have to go and take care of that curse that I promised Yaga I would look into.” Kento states.

Of course Satoru interrupts, “ I don’t know why you took that on. I told the higher-ups that this is my vacation and it’s going to be curse fucking free.”

“Yes well not all of us are the chosen one and can just tell our superiors no when they ask for something. Besides, it’s only a level two curse. It shouldn’t take me very long to handle.”

“ OK well Kento, just remembered to be extra careful. The curses of New Orleans are conniving. They’re not particularly hard to exercise, but they can get you in some sticky situations. Trust me, I know.” You informed him once more.

There weren’t many curses around here but the ones that were always tried to slip a trick on people before killing them.

“ I promise to be safe, my love” and he pressed a kiss against your temple.

“And Nanami, you know if you run into any trouble your Senpai will be there to help you. I’m just a call away.” And you would hear the cheekiness lingering in his voice.

“ for the love of God” Kento groaned.

Fortunately, for him, you were pulling up to the restaurant now. the restaurant happened to also be connected to a place where your mom and dad stayed the restaurant downstairs and their house being upstairs.

You got to your child home and you guys unloaded the car and were immediately tackled by your mom and dad.

After you guys got inside and settled, it was already time for lunch prep to get started.

“ since you guys will be the first ones here you get the best seat in the house, which is in the middle so you’re far enough from the stage to have conversation but close enough to really hear the band that’ll be playing.” You told them as you came downstairs.

“ I think I would prefer to sit right next to the band as to make sure no conversation is had actually” Nanami said on you guys reached the first floor.

“Awwwwww, Ken, don’t act like. You’re hurting my feelings” Satoru whine as he drooped his arm over Kento’s shoulder.

You grabbed Gojo by his ear and sat him down in a chair.

“Stop riling him up or I’m not making beignets for you. Do you understand??” You ask with your eyebrows raised expectantly.

“Yes ma’am” he pouts but stays quiet.

Everything is smooth for a while as you set up for lunch, start cooking, and eventually start letting guests inside.

The place was packed before an hour had even passed so Satoru and Kento were forced to give up there seats and skeedadle. Kento to handle the curse he agreed to exorcise and Satoru to try every sweet he could find in a 5 mile radius.

Business was booming from lunch onward. You didn’t have a break between prepping, cooking and serving orders in the gaps between servers.

Satoru was still missing in action and all you could hope is that he didn’t walk into a voodoo shop trying to get sweets and walk out hexed.

On the other hand, Kento hadn’t tried to contact you either, but you didn’t have much time to think about it or check in right before the dinner rush.

You tried calling him and ended up talking to voicemail, so you decided to text him. You just sent a quick message asking if he was OK and when he’d be back.

Around two hours later, Gojo came sauntering in looking like a kid who was let loose in a candy shop with a credit card. He had all types of to go bags and shopping bags hanging off of him.

He went up to drop everything off before he slid into the kitchen to see you. 

“ you haven’t heard from him since he left earlier”, he asked and you could hear the concern in his voice which only made you feel worse.

“ no and it started to make me nervous. I can’t just walk out and leave my dad to finish his dinner shift by himself.”

“Don’t worry, I’m sure he’s fine. I’ll use my six eyes to go see if I can find him. I’ll be back quick New Orleans minute” and the accent was so offensive you almost smacked the shit out of him.

“Just go.”

By the time Gojo got back, the dinner crowd had left, the restaurant was closed and you and your dad were in the back cleaning up.

He came in with no Nanami next to him, but both his hands hiding behind his back and a cheeky smile on his face.

“ where the hell is Kento! you’ve been gone for two hours and you mean to tell me you didn’t come back with him??” You started shouting at him.

You excused yourself from your parents ear shot while grabbing him by the ear again, and dragged him behind you.

“Ouch, ouch, ouch.” That really fucking hurts.

“ where the hell have you been? Where is my husband??!”

Satoru is rubbing his ear when he speaks, “ well I’ve got good news and bad news. Good news is I found Kinto, bad news is…” and he pulls his hand from behind his back. “ This is your husband.”

You immediately screamed because this asshole pulled a slimy, disgusting frog from behind his back!

“Satoru have you lost your mind again??? Have the sweets eaten a whole into your peanut sized brain!!! Get that thing out of here RIGHT NOW!!”

But before Gojo could speak…. The frog did.

“My love, i’m afraid this is the one time that Gojo is not joking around. It’s me.”

That voice was definitely Kento’s but there was no way. Absolutely now way.

“ I think she’s gonna pass out. Y/N are you gonna pass out?” Satoru said well balancing the frog in one hand and reaching out the other to catch your trembling form.

“Sweetheart maybe you should sit down. I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

That was Kento alright. Always the worrying, doting husband.

“ it was the curse, wasn’t it? Kento I told you that the curse is here were different. How did you manage to let this happen? You’re a frog!” Your hands were rubbing circles at your temple and you were pacing back and forth.

“You were 100% right, but it was more than one curse and I was caught off guard.”

“ yeah he couldn’t exercise them in his frog form so I had to do it when I got there and let me tell you those things look even more insane the ones in Japan. I did manage to get some information out of them before I killed them though.”

“What kind of information?” You groaned. You had such a killer headache right now it felt like your head would pound for the rest of your life.

“ good news first or bad news first” he asked you with small smile playing at your lips.

The death glare you gave him would’ve cut through his infinity if he had it on.

“ OK so good news first, um, you can fix him!” He says.

“Oh thank god!” You say on an exhale.

“He hasn’t said the bad news yet, baby” Kento chirps up.

“Yeaaaa… bad news is the only way to break. The curse is with true loves kiss”

“No” the word flew out of your mouth so quickly. “No why in hell am I kissing a frog.”

“ my love…”

“Do not “my love” me Kento. There’s no way! You’re SLIMY AND GREEN!” And you’re in full blown hysterics now.

You hear a chuckle from Gojo but he quickly shuts his mouth.

“ darling, I know this is a bad time to bring this up but… I do recall a certain asking on more than ONE occasion, if her husband would love her if she were a worm, a fish, and a plethora of other little creature. And said husband said yes to all of those.”

The calmness in his voice at that moment had never made you more irritated.

“ those were hypotheticals! You can’t throw that back in my face now.” You whine again because you don’t know what else to do.

Gojo decided now to speak up again, “ I may have also forgotten to mention that if the curse isn’t broken by midnight, your darling husband will stay in this form until his dying day”

“Turn off the infinity Satoru! Turn it off now!”

“So you can MURDER ME!?!? I think not!”

“Just give me one swing at the pretty face. You’ll only have 3 eyes when I’m done with you cuz I’m taking out half your power with one punch!” You shout.

Satoru keeps his infinity up, places Kento on a table, and starts walking away from your murderous being.

“ well I’ll take that as my cut to leave. I’ll let you lovebird sort this out amongst yourselves. Umm quick heads up midnight strikes in about six minutes do what you want with that goodbye!” And he’s out the door.

“Baby.” Your husband says in that soft soothing tone of his. “ I love you and I will continue to love you even if you leave me in this state as a green slimy frog, but I would truly prefer if we just did a quick little kiss and got this over with.”

“I cannot believe this! I should leave you like this you know. I told you several times not to take on this assignment.” You mewl.

“I know. I deserve this, I truly do.”

“I’m about to miss a frog. Me, (your full name) am about to kiss a fucking frog!”

“It’ll be quick love, just a quick peck. Close your eyes and it’ll be over before you know it.”

“I think I’m gonna bath.”

“Please wait until after the kiss. I don’t want you to throw up on me, I’m already slimy.”

“Why would you say that now??” You ask him with your eyes stretched.

“Sorry, bad timing.”

“Ughhhhhh. Fuck, fine. Count me down.”

You start jumping in place preparing your self.

“3”…. You start leaning in, “2” inching closer and trying to to keep your gag reflex in order, “1” you slam your eyes shut, pucker your lips and connect them to the amphibians.

Before you know it, Kento is again standing in front of you, but there is a flash blinding you from seeing his face.

“Wow, that is true love. Y/N you just kissed a frog.” When the flash dies down you see Gojo with his phone held up to you two. He was recording the whole thing.

“Oh that does it. You’re dying here satoru! Don’t run. Why are you running you piece of shit, get back here!!” And you spend the rest of the night trying to rip your best friend head off his body.

By the time you get back home, you’d managed to destroy Gojo’s phone and any evidence any of it ever happened.

“Are you ok my sweetheart? You’ve had an extremely trying day.” Kento asks as you both get into bed.

“No. I want to go to sleep and forget the last 24 hours happened.

“I completely understand. Get some sleep sweet girl.” And he tried to lean in and press a kiss to your lips.

Your hand stop him dead in his tracks.

“Too soon Kento, too soon.” And you turn your body away from him and try to fall to sleep. You hear him chuckle behind you and snuggle up to your back.

tags : @queenpiranhadon, @cashmoneyyysstuff, @tootiecakes234, @starieq, @sweetienans, @seonne, @lovelyiida, @lady-ashfade, @4evapika, @angels-fantasy, @2melamoo2 - check out their storybook event fics too!

[katyspersonal]

So, Rauh is Slavic + connections with Farum Azula?

I've noticed this first because of the area where you fight Magma Wyrm Makar at! It does have Rauh architecture, for starters:

But also, before this arena, you can find a unique variant of Chanting Winged Dame that appears to be wearing a variant of кокошник (kokoshnik), a traditional Russian tiara-like female headwear!

They have different variants, and this one appears to be triangle! I instantly recognised it, because this variant is very commonly found on depictions of Snegurochka (a Russian folklore character, she is a granddaughter to the guy who is basically our equivalent of Santa)!

Then, on the side note, Makar is a very popular name in Slavic countries! There is even information that it is straight up a name that appeared in Russia; back then, when old Russia accepted Orthodox Christianity from Greece, a LOT of names were adopted here from Greece too and then most were changed a bit over time in language environment! Makar is one of such names, originating from the word Μακάριος and changed into just Makar in environment with Slavic languages!

There are also some other things I've noticed that seem to match Slavic aesthetic! The first one features what could be another variant of kokoshnik, and also clothes that are very similar to a variant of sarafan, also a traditional dress in Slavic countries! I agree that the second image features appearances similar to Nox females, but also to this other traditional Russian folk look!

Again, I am kind of just spotting these because I've seen these a lot upon growing up in history and art classes, as well as on the events! Some of these just look soooooo similar, and darn name 'Makar' especially convinced me I am not overthinking it xD

There is also this statue in Farum Azula, that also has "Rauh aesthetic" and appears to be wearing a variant of a sarafan! These details were not something I could make sense of in the base game, they just seemed like nice aesthetic inspirations, but with SOTE, Rauh even became a thing, so...?

This statue is specifically found in the arena where we fight Maliketh and take Destined Death, and female figure being found near a Shadowbeast (three beings making one, kinda like if a Kamaitachi was a wolf instead of a weasel) does feel like an Empyrean! If you believe it could be Gloam-Eyed Queen, that'd make her have Rauh descent I suppose! Could she have even met Marika while she was still a Shaman? That's one doomed yuri if I've seen one dshfhfd

(I am also wondering if a link with Farum Azula could've explained the bat people in general? They could be a variant of a dragonborn, maybe... There is a Draconian preset for a Tarnished, that is just a humanoid with a 'rocky' skin, as well as Godrick mentions literal blood relation to Dragons in Japanese, proving the species can mingle! So, the so-called "bat ladies" + those annoying screaming mobs might be not just from Rauh, but one of the variants of an offspring of humanoids and Dragons?)