#I CANT BE STOP FROM CREATING OK ITS A PART OF ME

[acekindaneat]

happy halloween

😈💚temporary rebrand teehee

[thewertsearch]

JADESPRITE: what did you do to me?? JADE: i prototyped you and brought you back! [...] JADESPRITE: you shouldnt have, this is overwhelming and awful [...] JADESPRITE: its hard to describe what its like JADESPRITE: but its too much for me JADESPRITE: and the sun... JADESPRITE: its way too big and bright and i cant stop seeing it...

Dream Jade was thrust into godhood against her will, and she’s not taking it well. Sensory overload is only to be expected, as her body is pierced by emerald rays that she was never meant to feel.

As far as Jade was aware, Dream Jade's consent to prototype this body was equivalent to her own. She's OK with this, so it's probably somewhat disconcerting that Jadesprite is not. It's like having your own reflection disagree with you.

JADESPRITE: i was happy where i was with my friends

Wait, so Dream Jade was aware after she died? Was she a ghost?

...wait a second.

If Dream Jade had her own consciousness in death, before she was prototyped, doesn't that mean she always had a separate identity to her counterpart? That there were always two Jades in the equation, even though they were never awake simultaneously?

I'm starting to think that everything I know about Dream Selves might be wrong.

JADESPRITE: i want to go back JADE: i dont think... JADE: that it can be undone :(

Not even in the obvious way. The whole reason we created Jadesprite is because she's borderline indestructible, and therefore might stand a chance against an invincible foe. Her inability to die is the whole point.

JADESPRITE: why, why would you do this? JADE: we need your help! […] JADE: me and dave and rose and john JADESPRITE: john!!!!!!!!!!! […] JADESPRITE: john, poor john… JADESPRITE: id forgotten about him JADE: what do you mean, how could you forget about john??? JADESPRITE: it was so long ago! i put that sad memory behind me

From Jade’s perspective, her Dream Self died hours ago – but Jadesprite’s body has been dead for years, and that seems to be the frame of reference she was working from in the afterlife.

She's been pulled out of peaceful rest, stuffed into a Sprite, and commanded to do her part as a Player once again, in a session which was traumatic enough for her for the first time around.

It's not just the Green Sun's light that's bothering Jadesprite - this whole situation is hell for her.

JADESPRITE: after we died i looked all over for him but couldnt find him […] JADE: but john didnt die! JADE: i saved him JADE: YOU saved him, dont you remember?

She also seems to think that John died alongside her, even though her last act was to save his life. This is still Dream Jade, after all, and she’s always been a little absent-minded.

[ganondoodle]

still thinking about how even just the decision to basically act like the shiekah tech never existed is just ... so baffling to me

bc again you could have done all the sonau tech does with shiekah instead, and they were perfect to be explored more in a sequel, why wouldnt you grasp that potential, the literal building blocks for more??

if you are that tired of shiekah tech .. dont make it a fuckign sequel to the game prominently featuring it???? totk doesnt take place generations after botw in which things could have changed drastically, its just a few years afterwards??

you want to reuse the map and get rid of shiekah tech? ok fine take LINK into the past then and the focus is for you to find a way to return; do some neat twist where its revealed that link was the one who sealed gan bc he couldnt defeat him without zelda or something if you dare (they wouldnt)

want less work than that and still reuse the map and get rid of shiekah tech AND reuse characters? ok then make it some alternate universe thingy like majoras mask in which everythign is the same but also isnt, its weird and creepy how characters you thoguht you knew suddendly dont act like themselves, shiekah tech doesnt exist, malice is now miasma, etc, it would give reason to why you feel so much like something about this world is familiar yet also very wrong

as far as im aware every "sequel" we have had so far were either generations apart from the first one, some alternate universe or a different location altogether- in all of which its plausible that things are different, things seem weirdly familiar but also wrong, or that another continent just works different from hyrule

but totk does none of that, its supposedly just a few years after the first game, same world same character, but its BUILT like some strange jumbled mess of stuff from botw and new stuff out of nowhere that just .. doesnt fit, but feeling a strange sense of otherness, a déja vu of something you know but it acts off, like an imposter, thats NOT intentional and it shows, its a mess of botw stuff, from stuff that people missed from the old games and entirely new stuff; i dont doubt it CAN work but the way it turned out is like a mix of 3 different puzzles forced together and being told 'see it fits!' even tho you can clearly see the pieces dont look right in these places

again it feels like a sequel that desperately wants you to forget the first game happened, that anythign from it mattered at all

and that isnt really ... the sense of a sequel? why insist on it being one when it only creates problems? is it marketing?? just like it was marketing to call age of calamity a telling of what happened before botw but then it wasnt that at all and that is still the sole reason why i dislike it? bc i was lied to? totk is like 10000 times worse than that, its a main title and doesnt even have the excuse of yeah its basically an excuse to play all your fav characters in fun ways and the game beign well aware that being its main appeal; what is totk appeal? a toybox with botw aestethic and none of the flavor?

(on a sidenote; the sonau tech doesnt even .. matter? in botw at least calamity ganon was made of shiekah tech parts and him overtaking other tech is a big point, the sonau tech doesnt serve anything but .. idk minerus useless mech? gan doesnt even aknowledge it, he doesnt care, all it is is toys for the player, not link, but the player. the monsters mining the tech materials? what for? gan doesnt give a damn and they dont work for the yiga either??)

i said it before but it gives me the feeling that the way botw invited you to theorize, to look beneath the surface, the way it intrigued you and laid the groundwork for so many interesting things without denying anything.. was accidental? or perhaps put in the game without the directors noticing? i cant stop thinking about them saying sth like "after botw zelda wondered if the kingdom of hyrule needed to keep existing the way it had been before the calamity, but then totk happens" bc it just feels like they realized too late that botw naturally led into questioning the status quo and they scrambled to fit it back into a flat and boring road we have seen so many times before (or even worse really) with totk

zeldas character naturally leads into her questioning and reexamine their history and set of rules? we gotta teach her a lesson of why she is importante god given monarchy girl that has to keep it bc what if evil brown man shows up again for no reason

maybe im grasping at straws here but looking at it this way the sonau .. make more "sense"; the shiekah were a group that was under the rule of the royal family, and misstreated before (oh no look soemthing interesting) so they dont lend themselves well to be used for teaching zelda that lesson- the sonau however are tailored really to be just that; they are a supposedly godly race from the literal sky that founded this version of hyrule, that had tech even more advanced and better than the shiekah, she gets put in the past to meet the perfect god king of goodness personally, also his very fridgy wifey that zelda later replaces in a way, shes put there and treated like family and then gets to see just how evil that evil big man from the desert is, sonia is falcon-punched to death solely so zelda can feel obligated to take over her role, have her new, better 'family' hurt by gan; similarly so raurus sacrifice, look what a noble and good king he is, he payed the ultimate price to lock that evil man away, now zelda you cannot let their sacrifice go to waste, rebuild that divinely good kingdom like it was!!

and even though they go so much out of their way to put the cart back onto the rails of black and white-good and evil in an even flatter way than the old games, it still doesnt feel right, at least to me, it still feels like zelda shouldnt have gone along with all of that, it feels like even her character from botw was walked back entirely, except for the intro, it made her feel like a stranger to me-

because this is a sequel, i know this zelda, she wouldnt act like that after all that shes been through, this feels ... off

and it all just insulting to anyone who cared about botw more than surface level, or the zelda lore in general, i dont even care much about the timeline, but theres alot of lore and themes beyond it that felt ignored, especially so given that .. its a damn sequel, non AU, not generations apart, directly part 2-

but its not.

it even feels very "corporate", put zelda in a dress again, people liked that, put crazy abilities in the game to flashbang people with how insane it is even if its not the best for the gameplay or the story, put a new asthetic into it out of nowhere bc its 'new' and act like its been there the whole time, put gan in there bc people miss him and find him sexy even if his role is just as flat as that of an evil cloud monster-

*sigh*

you know, i saw a post that said aoc was like a bad fanfic (affectionate) and totk was like a bad fanfic (derogatory) and tbh thats like one of the best comparisons/summaries i have seen ..

[lovebvni]

Pick - A -Pile (love themed from 07.30.2022)

again, briefing you by saying this is from 2022. i was a different person two years ago, LMFAO

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[ 🖊 ] created ⋮ 18.7.22

[  ] published ⋮  30.7.22

˚₊·͟͟͟͟͟͟͞͞͞͞͞͞➳❥ ꒰ ⌨ ✰ Arsyn   ⋆  ⁱˢ ᵗʸᵖⁱⁿᵍ··· ꒱ | ೃ࿔₊•

┊       ⋆     welcome to my blog !

┊     °

For starters, I am so sorry how long its been since i did a pick a pile (2 months?) and I'm praying this isn't my last one of the year. I'm moving and I cant bring my tarot card with me and I'm worried I wont have them for a while.. Anyways lets stop being depressing.

Hello! Welcome to a pick a pile. This is a general reading, everything should be taken with a grain of salt. Hundreds of people may read this, everything I say in your pile(s) will NOT resonate. Today we have (the first one is pretty much 2 different piles)4 piles and the following questions.

1. How far are you on your shifting journey?

2. a general message from ur s/o.

along with these questions i will give things that may draw you to your pile. i will be using tarot and oracle cards.

now please take everything with a grain of salt!

breathe in...

and out...

now please, pick a pile or two

[pile 1,2

pile 3,4]

Welcome pile one!!

let me see what may resonate for this pile before this reading, as confirmation this is the right pile: true, the colour hot pink, passion, cold-hearted and cold-blooded, "remember why you started", "everything is for a reason", "life isnt fair sometimes, and that sucks", deities, ocean, water, "i'd rather do this alone"

For the first question, How far are you in your shifting journey?

the lovers

ok so there are 2 different energies in this pile. the first one being those in the honeymoon era, they're just beginning shifting and think its everything and more! romanticizing the idea of being with their s/o and shifting. you're almost turning a blind eye to the other parts of shifting, the fact its ACTUAL FUCKING LIFE! its not just a perfect place, man, its like your cr. you're going to have altercations, fights, and everything else.the others are in the ones who know about shifting, and have been doing it for a few months, maybe even years. you're in the people who know how it is but you're getting back into shifting. who are starting to love it and understanding that shifting is a great thing that you shouldn't have stopped/taken that long of a break. you're almost in a 'new love/ new beginnings' era. you're getting reading to pull off the side of the highway. GET BACK INTO IT!! YOU GOT THIS!!

What does your s/o want to tell you?

so i was called to get an oracle card for this.

"Nothing is yet set in stone, mutable moon" and "Expect a powerful change, new moon eclipse"

The Chariot

these are for the two different energies. the first honeymoon era people are being told you can change how you are and how you see things. dont change your whole personality ofc, just how you see things. dont hold it back. waves change sometimes, the water isnt a different formula though. sobbing of course loki's card came out. you're going to move forward at a rapid pace, and have fun with it! take this and you'll shift soon!

3 of cups 3 of swords

the new beginnings era is reflected in the new moon. new ways of seeing things, new methods, change. theres a lot of change. going on, new ways of seeing things. new friends, new advice. stop doing this alone, its only hurting you, i feel like your energy was in my last pick a pile too. sharing is the best way to understand things. people can relate and give advice to move forward. I feel like you've been in a heartbreak before/toxic friendships/or you're just shy so you dont want to talk to theres about this. you need to communicate. it will help you a LOT.

thank you pile 1!! i hope this resonates 

welcome pile 2!

confirmation this is the right pile: late nights, deep breathing, burning bridges, endings, cupid, wings, outdoors, flowers, loops, asleep methods. purple, blue, shinsou, iida, speed, fire signs, water signs.

1. How far are you on your shifting journey?

oracle: have faith in ur dreams waxing crescent moon, dont let pride get in your way

tarot: the sun, three of swords reversed, four of cups

i feel like this pile has overcome a lot. you guys may have shifter or are VERY VERY close to shifting. i mean like days or even a few weeks away. this pile may make you really like self centered almost? may have been told this before but as long as you dont get cocky, you will shift. dont roll your eyes and say 'ugh, this again'. YOU GOT THIS! try meditating before you shift. maybe try channeling for advice. a friend what they heard for you. do one of those 'what messages do you hear for me' things! they may be helpful. i also recommend that you use an asleep method, and visualize what you feel. i dont care if you're "not good at it" just fucking try man, you're getting nowhere by pouting.

2. a message from your s/o.

oracle: show the world the real you full moon in aquarius, hold your vison fixed moon

tarot: three of wands reversed, five of wands reversed

with these two cards coming out i heard "i know you feel like youre back tracking, but you're really not. keep pushing yourself, dont let anything change how. do take the advice you have been given and dont ire yourself. if you feel like its not the night, keep pushing because your brain could just be telling you otherwise. listen to your heart.

welcome pile 3! it is 12:23AM as im typing this

heres confirmation this is ur pile!

: 711, stubborn, holding onto the past, letting go, pink, red, past love, new love, royalty dr, red and blue, SERIOUS mood swings, tamaki, ohchs, polyamory

1. How far are you on ur shifting journey?

oracle: work through your fears new moon in scorpio, conlusions are winthin reach full moon eclipse

tarot: ten of torches (wands) reversed, 10 of cups reversed, queen of torches, two of swords,

i feel like this pile is holding onto past fears/anxieties. you need to push through these and you'll see big changes. i heard shadow work and i feel like you've done this before/been told to do this before. but you didnt. i feel like there was a manipulative divine feminine energy here. someone who was passionate and maybe your relationship/friendship fell apart. i feel sad for this pile because you guys were really close to you. you trusted them with your life. you're still sad about this. heartbreak happens.

2. message from ur s/o

oracle: believe in the impossible, blue moon

tarot: page of cups, the sun reversed, 3 of coins

i feel like your s/o is saying although you dont know who they are (your s/o may be undecided) but they're watching you during your highs and lows. they're rooting for you. they're so happy you're shifting. they want to hug you so tight one day and just be able to stay with you. i hear that sometimes your highs and lows are uncontrolable, shadow work may help you. you may have tried shifting in a past life and gave up completely. this is the life you will finally do it.

Pile 4!

Last pile! yall dont know how happy i am to be on the last pile. its almost 1:30 am im tired asf bc i fixed my sleep schedule.

confirmation: addiction, sweets, hearts, queen of hearts, alice in wonderland, playing cards, 333, missing out/feeling left out,

How far are you on your shifting journey?

oracle: i was guided not to grab any

tarot: the hanged man, nine of torches, three of pentacles reversed

you're at a point of being stuck. like you were in a web. you're moving out of it a little bit but you stopped and said "well the rain will get me out." you're relaxing trying to let the universe do the work. take that knife out your pocket and get to work man! you're wanting something but doing nothing. thats lazy. if you dont put anything in theres no chance of getting it back.

A message from your s/o.

oracle: Thake your time and breathe out disseminating moon

tarot: ace of wands, temperance reversed, three of wands, ace of cups reversed

you know you have great creative potential. why dot you use it to make your own method? write what makes you so happy to shift. express how much you love your s/o in a letter. they're telling you to use this creativity you have stored up in you for the good. it will benefit you and everyone around you. you may inspire someone else! they're telling you to take a step back from a hard situation and work on a side quest, almost. it will help you in the long run (like getting a level advantage over one of the bosses) i can tell you're getting impatient. learn that everything happens for a reason. take a break. focus on something else. dont make shifting the only thing you're looking forward to in life. okay? once you do this you'll move forward although it will be hard to realize (for you) that shifting ISNT WHAT LIFE IS ABOUT!

thank you all for reading! i hope it resonated. i worked on this from 11pm to 2 am omg

ONCE AGAIN, THIS WAS ORIGINALLY POSTED IN 2022.

[narwhalandchill]

ok one thing i am Absolutely certain of is that something is Up with misha and im far from the only one

the fact that literally No character acknowledges his presence beyond us and clockie (who, mind you, isnt seen by anyone else either). how his dialogue as a visitor to the express has him likening it to feeling the way "home" does. the fucking keyhole eyes and the keyhole door motifs in the dreamscape Especially a childs dream (and whos a child in the penacony cast???)

and just honest to fuck the ENTIRETY of a childs dream like. mikhail. when misha is a diminutive of the name. the voices you hear during the story segment in the map DEFINITELY include mishas. they describe it as a dream that is created from the memories of a child yet its also the map that contains the most references to the watchmaker including that room which seems like his workshop or sth??

his interest in the astral express and the new gacha destruction LC literally depicting him receiving a ticket to the express (from his grandpa too whos prolly the mikhail n also the watchmaker) combined with the fact our invitation to penacony was using the EXPRESS distress call genuinely makes me feel like it could be him behind that hidden message

n then i just saw a comment that wondered whether hes the fucking nilou to penaconys "dream". and like. it would be so fucking wild but also adds up so well?? Or maybe im insane but listen.

penaconys dream is falling apart its sinking back into the depths of a much more chaotic, dangerous memory space. the way the dream samsara in genshin 2.0 story worked was that it depended on the "dreamer" never becoming aware of the fact that theyre dreaming. and what question does the distress call slash invitation carry? one thats pondering the meaning of dreaming. one that i can VERY well believe to be coming from someone whos literally been dreaming for aeons know How long slowly becoming aware and asking Why. Why does life slumber?

if misha has been created as or made into the lynchpin of penaconys dream holding it all together but for some reason has begun rousing from his slumber and gotten close enough to awareness that he IS dreaming that its beginning to affect the stability of the dreamscape. and he has some sort of vague memories (or maybe inherited ones thru his 'grandpa' who might well be just the watchmaker that Created him) of the express. wouldnt it make complete sense for the first thing in his mind to call for the express?

and even things like "death" too? if misha is the dreamer and waking up and hes fucking terrified and confused and disoriented. Yet its still his dream that makes up the entirety of the dreamscape. its not at all unrealistic on the level of just the idea itself that his creeping existential dread of who he even is and if hes even real outside of this dream hes now been forced into being aware of. begins to take the shape of an actual death incarnate in the memory zone. bc isnt that what it is to discover you yourself might just be a part of a dream - and a dream that could fall apart any moment if you wake up. That he might be already dead - or never even have existed in reality at all. like sheesh kid id be spawning nightmarish horrors into my dreamscape too

then i also just rly feel like. the watchmaker equals a nameless equals mikhail equals mishas grandfather but also the creator of penaconys dream but also possibly either the creator of misha or maybe misha himself being not only a diminutive of mikhail in name but Literally . as in a fragment of the watchmaker left behind in the dreamscape as the dreamer holding it all together. the LITERAL watchmakers legacy. like hhhhhhhh i cant stop thinking about thiss

if aventurines trying to take back penacony for the IPC does it mean hes literally trying to wake misha up to destroy the dream (tho he might be unaware of this being the final step as of rn himself)?? and the familys interest is obviously in forcing the dreamer to slumber eternally. but the one thing neither party might foresee is misha himself taking action too. which hes Already done if it was him behind those invites too

+ acherons comments when u first meet her? about the dream being doomed to fall apart in the end. it feels prophetic. ppl have theorized shes an emanator of terminus the finality which could mean she experiences linear time in reverse the same as her aeon. literally traveling from the end to the beginning in a predestined path. so if thats true then its almost guaranteed she wasnt making a hypothetical comment about the dream being destroyed.

she mightve seen it happen already.

man what the hell is going on in this planet😭😭

[im-out-of-it]

part two of season two, episode five “dust and shadows” LEAVE ALEC ALONE

27. rude skipping over mags

28. Magnus isn’t afraid of his powers, he just doesn’t want to be involved in necromancy iris

29. I know iris and madzie are made up but I honestly love the show for creating madzie. she’s so adorable and it’s sweet that Magnus and Alec and Catarina are guiding her and raising her. I’m not a fan of book Malec raising kids and here’s why

30. CC is behind it. even tries to have Alec’s kids like jace more than alec. I don’t like how she handles Malec being parents. you cant trust her to be in charge of anything because she will overshadow it with Jace. so yes the show did it so much better and I would have loved to see Malec being parents on the show more

31. awwww it’s madzie

32. okay I couldn’t find the right gif and I’ll use that one again but it’s madzie!!!!!!!

33. Clary needs to learn how to ask probing questions before she agrees to stuff she doesn’t know about smh

34. looks like Simon missed his mama

35. to be fair, that’s just Simon ✨ it’s called I’m dead mom

36. Aldertree: yeah bitch I’m replaceable but that mortal sword isn’t

37. well, I get what aldertree is saying here. Valentine has a moral instrument thanks to jace and who knows what his next plan is and it’s not going to be good. not like the clave actually cares about downworlders but Valentine + mortal instrument = bad things happening (especially if by now they know about his desire to seek a wish)

38. jace thought saving aldertree was more important than a mortal instrument so he made a split decision even if it were a bad one

39. shadowhunters whole thing is dying for the clave

40. “a soldier without discipline is poison to his entire squad” aldertree. hey isn’t that what I have been saying? he must be reading my mind

41. jace can’t follow orders or listen. it’s always what he wants to do and how things make him feel. he’s a self centered narcissist dick who can’t make sensible choices. he never thinks things through hence why Izzy was almost deruned and Alec almost died

42. I don’t think jace or clary have a brain

43. he’s banned from duty not because of his atrocities against downworlders but because he said hey I don’t support the clave and I saved aldertree. shows what the clave cares more about

44. MALEC MOMENT ✨🥹 I love how Alec just lets himself in because he feels safe at Magnus’s and here’s a preview of season three: ALEC COMES WITH THE PLACE OK MAGNUS’S LOFT + ALEC = A PACKAGE DEAL

45. okay back to Malec (I love how concerned Magnus is)

46. Magnus: is that the love of my life?

47. it makes me so sad to see how Alec is processing this but I’m glad he gets to process it

48. here’s the whole video of their conversation:

49. it honestly doesn’t get talked about how Alec will self harm when he’s dealing with something extreme. Alec is punishing himself by not using healing runes after shooting a million arrows into the sky. Alec has such a big heart and he’s blaming himself for so much of this even if it wasn’t his fault. he didn’t mean to let a demon in and he didn’t mean to kill Jocelyn but he did that. in his way, avoiding the institute, shooting a trillion arrows, and not bothering to heal himself- in a way, he feels as though he deserves that. it’s really sad all in all and I do wish this scene was a bit longer but I’m still happy we ended up getting it- but also here are some Alec/malec moments that are somehow happier:

and I’m stopping at 50 and sorry this one took me a while. ITS BEEN A DAY but I’ll post another one shortly

[ilovejojo]

character ask game... umm this is probably generic but rohan... u get him

ThankYou for the ask 💗

First impression: It was , a 6+ hour long continuous explosion of epiphany and realization.. i cannot describe the magnitude of his impact it was spiritual.. actually felt just like this: ↓

Impression now: hes so META, how do i explain what rohan means to me? he's an artist, above all else, whats most fascinating is the very fact that araki created this guy.

Favorite moment: The spider i condone it

And this LOL

Idea for a story: we got a lot of rohan stories at this point. but, i feel very curious about his parents.. however, it feels that because of the nature of his character, we are not supposed to know this, the same way he cannot die..

Unpopular opinion: he's not a dilfhunter desperate to get railed by jotaro or honestly anyone for that matter at least the way he is during part 4 is just so contradictory to this fan characterization, hes detached, rohan is detached from actual direct human relationships, hes not trying to get fucked its some of the most out of character things ive seen from the fandom it drives me nuts....... Rohan has turned people into objects of study..there is an emotional detachment. This is the core of all his problems. He does not even remember the trauma. He would never go out and seek relationships the way a lot of fan interpretations depict him, you know?

Another: i also think a lot of people dont often see rohans growth? the impact koichis friendship had on him, the realization that he can just, be friends with people, and he does, he makes more and more friends, hes still rohan, but this is not an insignificant change at all

Favorite relationship (platonic, familial etc): ok gonna list, a few. because how cant i.... Reimi..of course. It's so cute. i like to think she really encouraged him to pursue art when he was little.

Kyoka its perfect only they can handle each other. Also, why doesnt anyone talk about how she was the most important thing in his life during millionaire village ..!!!!???? canonically?! he trusts her so much she has the keys to his house x

and josuke it's the funniest thing ever and i love what it brings out in rohan..

Bakin if he counts, its so cute to me that he decided to get a dog, and bakin being apparently a labrador retriever like Arnold🥹 Ok i cant stop listinh these I also love his friendship with tonio 💗

Favorite headcanon: Pink dark boy is, within the jojo universe, what jojo is to us..a bit to the left, maybe, but, even to those characters, i believe pink dark boy is such an incredibly insane baffling colorful creation. We can only imagine

[chenyuvale]

OK. THANK YOU TUMBLR URL @THELUNATICGHOST FOR SPONSORING ME AND MY THOUGHTS.

[im going to use he/him pronouns for furina (and focalors by extension]

furina genshin impact. you know him, the guy who acted a part in a play that wasnt his own play for like 500 years the guy who yes, can be annoying but is honestly just a silly little guy!! thats all he is!! thats all hes ever wanted to be; himself

furina genshin impact is in canon, a she/her, i heavily disagree with this because of his design, and his overal character being made 1) from someone else and 2) "[he] was made to be the perfect human" that focalors created for himself, focalors is also trans but more genderfuckery because his gender is Divinity and also dead. anyways.

focalors design is a mirror image of furina's "archon" outfit the light one, pneuma version i believe, and in focalors top part of the dress, its quite revealing! theres a lot of chest skin showing there and the most important thing about this; flat. literally no tiddy there at all in the slightest.

now because focalors made furina based on himself, they have the exact same body, just duplicated, meaning! furina also has literally no tiddy!! nothing!! zip zilch na da!!! he has a very rectangular torso (adding evidence to my transmasc idea), even if he did have canon tits (which he does not this is proven) he is purposefully covering them up with the french ass ruffles hes got going on up there, /purposefully/ covering.

the most exposed furinas design is, is his legs, he has rather short shorts (akin to hu tao who Also has no titty but there is room to see a curve there because hu tao doesnt have. the chest ruffles) ((this could lead to how hu taos design is also quite tmasc coded but sadly enough im not a hu tao insaner)) so i could Maybe sort of if i squint real hard i can see why people would want to exaggerate the legs a little

But when people ( the horny + uninformed.. usually..) give him the most hourglass shape figure?? or even Big Boobs im like??????? first off did yall play the archon quest and second ????????? of all genshin characters you think furina deserves boobs??? Flawed logic he is not who you think he is, like even ignoring my headcanons In Canon he is very much jus living his best life being a theater director !!!!!!! hes not an actor anymore !!!!!! furina genshin impact is the wrong character to put your horny beams on !!!!

and for the people in the back

Furina Genshin Impact Is The Wrong Character to Put Your Horny Beam On

does any of this make much sense? probably not,, do i care not rlly i jus hate how the fandom treats him so so so so much its why i cant really consume fancontent of him anymore that isnt made by a trusted mutual of mine, we are saving him from fanons grabby dirty hands and putting him in our own grabby dirty hands :3

what makes it worse is neuvifuri. there are people who believe that neuvifuri are either 1) father/daughter (this is the same crowd who think zhongxiao are also father/son) 2) siblings or 3) a cishet married couple with furina as the UwU Wifey and neuvi as the gigachad husband.

These are All Wrong

pushing most of my headcanons aside, literally in canon neuvi is the one constantly down bad for furi, Constantly!!!! he had a moment of realisation in the archon quest, realising he appreciates furina a lot more than he first thought he did (see furina story quest AND neuvi birthday letter)

and also in canon furina is Terrified of losing him, so he distanced himself (see his about neuvillette line)

now headcanon territory kinda ; neuvi watched focalors fucking Die in front of him, whilst givhim the original dragon power back, that shit was still traumatising as all hell , i think neuvi is just as equally afraid of losing furi as furi is of losing him

,, if i keep going i wont stop about how much i adore their specific dynamic but ANYWAYS. back to the point;

Fanon is Wrong

(have an old doodle as thanks for reading,,,)

thank you for reading all this, it sounded more composed in my head i swear i jus uwauwuuawu biting fandom so hard

[scourgefrontiers]

i DREAM of one day creating something as unbelievably silly and frankly sometimes str8 up stupid yet BRILLIANT and FUN and EXCITING as inazuma eleven. im so inspired as a creator by this silly little kids show about fucking soccer of all things

i will never stop gushing about how good inazuma eleven is to me. it means SO MUCH to me for so many reasons but the one i wanna mention rn is just. the fact that it's such a silly concept, objectively it's SO silly. but it WORKS and its FUN and even though shit happens that is so ridiculous it shouldnt be good its so actually enjoyable and i cant stop thinking about it and rewatching it over and over

the first season can be kind of a drag at some parts, but its so important to watch it at least once because it sets up so many things--the world of soccer that involves actual tangible superpowers used in the plays, the relationships of the core characters and how they begin (mainly the managers + endou, gouenji, and kidou), the start of raimon's soccer club and by extension their soccer as a whole, the menace that is kageyama reiji...........just. its so good and its so important. the VERY SECOND EPISODE is insane with the introduction of gouenji's fire tornado and fucking DEATH ZONE and endou's god hand and just, its so good. its so good yall

the second season is where shit gets crazier somehow and gives everyone an idea of how insane inazuma eleven as a series can be. it actually--and this is true--almost turned me off from watching the rest of the show bc it was SUCH a hard left turn from the first season i couldnt handle it without being spoiled by my wife lol. but now? it's my TOP favorite season. it introduces amazing characters (FUBUKI? FUDOU? SAGINUMA? MIDORIKAWA? HIROTO? ok mostly aliea kids but still. i am biased perhaps) and just the DESIGNS of a lot of the alien kids are so cool to me (desarm. im looking at you). top favorite season hands down

the third season is a bit of a toned-down season compared to s2's "hey aliens are attacking and theyre using soccer to do it" because it just focuses on the kids as kids playing soccer in an international tournament (with an overarching world domination plot, granted) but also it has these little weird bits that make it so bizarre even still, such as the mini arc where they play against actual angels and demons or the filler ep with the kappas. its still got that sorta supernatural element to it that i adore

dont even get me started on go. soccer communism. actual for real time travel. REAL aliens this time. i cant even begin to explain how all this actually ties into the plot because it DOES somehow i promise. but like good lord its so insane LOL and thats why i love it

anyway ALL OF THIS GUSHING TO SAY, i hope to one day make a story and world as simple and silly yet exciting and fun as inazuma eleven. thank you

[okthatsgreat]

hiii lee :) 🍀❤️🧠 for any oc you want to talk about!

GONNA USE ERIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! also hiiiii lily hello hiiii :) everybody here wish my friend lily a happy early birthday ok

OC ASK GAME!!

🍀 - what originally inspired the oc?

pippy/erin was created for a danganronpa rp i was in and was developed a whole lot during that rp that shaped the character she is today!!!! BEFORE the rp when she was still a nameless character being used to fill out a cast of ultimates, she was floating around as either the ultimate voice actress OR the ultimate preschool teacher (who now is an entirely different guy lol), who was meant to be this very chipper, bright personality that provided levity to the group.

when i finally stopped being a pussy and decided to write out an application for the rp i decided that i NEEDED her to be in costume all of the time. like this is a cartoon character. ALSO what was really cool was this rp included the idea of a worldwide hpa program, which meant ultimates from different countries were encouraged, and immediately i was like OHHH I NEED TO MAKE HER AUSTRALIAN. I NEED TO BASE HER OFF OF EMMA WATKINS FROM THE WIGGLES. those red pigtails are DEFINITELY from her lmfao!!!! pippy also knows and teaches sign language as an homage to emma watkins as well :]

childrens programming ALSO inspired the rest of pippy's costume!!! her colour scheme is very bright and peppy, using a lot of "in your face" colours that made me think of a kid's colouring box and the australian kids show "Hi-5" that i used to watch ALL THE TIME AS A KIDDDD

her backstory was inspired by a few real child actors who acted as the primary breadwinners of the family and got denied their earnings, as well as being treated pretty terribly by the industry. jennette mccurdy's memoir definitely played a part as well. erin's personality is definitely an EXTREME (because its danganronpa lmfao) but a lot of what happened to her is based in reality

❤️ - what is one of your oc’s best memories?

a lot of what erin THINKS are her best memories turns out to just be memories of her success lmfaooooo. bc thats when the most people were happy with her!!!! which means during the killing game her best memories were likely linked to getting her very own show and being recognized as THE ultimate children's entertainer

in a beautiful universe where she has long since realised the extent of what she's gone through and processed a whole lot of it, her best memories would definitely be a lot more simple i think!! like learning how to drive a car or just hanging out with her close friends and feeling like she actually can just be totally herself for the first time :]

🧠 - what do you like most about the oc?

ohhhh pippy is so fun to write. i love erin and i know her being pippy is terrible for her mental health but pippy is SOOOOO fun to write LMFAO. like she is SO annoying. she is the girl in your 7am class who has already downed two cups of coffee and is talking loudly about bird facts. she is the girl who hugs you without asking and smiles without moving her eyes and constantly is at 100 percent energy no matter the circumstances. she has a fucking ukulele. that she brings everywhere. and she can improvise songs on the fly.

and the best part of it all?????????????? this entire time she could be annoying the shit out of you and calling you her best friend but unless you are seriously trying to cut through to her SHES PROBABLY FUCKING LYING LMAO. SHES ALWAYS MOVING SHE THINKS SHE CANT MAKE REAL FRIENDS. SO YOURE JUST SITTING THERE LISTENING TO HER PLAY HER COLLEEN BALLINGER ASS UKULELE FOR NOTHING BASICALLY

[onlyjaeyun]

ZADIE LOVE AHHHHHHH i kid u not i was on the edge whenever i saw ur wc update literally went "OMG OMG ITS HAPPENING" am i ready to actually start reading? no ill never be but i am also soSOOO invested in what happened between hoonyn i HAVE TO BRACE MYSELF

ok enough yapping and onto to the actual chapter 👉🏻👈🏻 im actually gna start crying yn was probably the sweetest little girl ever surrounded w her loving family im so happy she had her maternal aunt at the very least 🥹 she even saved up money to get her brothers' gifts she's so precious 🥺🥺 NOOO LITTLE HOONYN WERE LITERALLY EACH OTHERS CONSTANT SUPPORT IM SO BROKEN 😭😭😭 THEY WERE TOO PURE TOO GOOD FOR THE CRUELTY THAT IS THE WORLD

yn's gift is in a little box? a jewellery mayhaps... STOP OMG HOON'S HER SECRET SANTA!,!/&;&&: SKDJAKSJS (icb they nvr gotten each other b4 tho 🧐) WORLD PAUSE SUNGHOON WANTED TO DO WHAT NOW?:!/& someone hold me i feel faint. we've COME SO FAR IM LITERALLY ABOUT TO BAWL 😭😭😭😭😭😭 "not only show you how over the ongoing war between you two he is, but also one he could use as a way to maybe win you over again" IM IN TEARS. THE WAR IS ENDING 😭😭😭

im actually so proud(?) of hoon for accepting his feelings like to go from saying the meanest things 24/7 to a person to actually admitting that you still want to have that person around takes alot of courage and he has my respect for that!

ok so he chose a sentimental gift... A SNOWFLAKE NECKLACE?:!/$ MAYBE?? 🤔 IM LITERALLY ABOUT TO START BOUNCING OFF THE WALLS WHY AM I SO NERVOUS 🤕 HE FAWKING WROTE HER A CARD IN JAPANESE. yep im out. 😭🤣😭😭😭😭😭😭🤣🤣🤣😭😭 STOOPP ITTT HE GOT HER A RING W HER MOTHER'S BIRTHSTONE?:!/!/ IM ACTUALLY IN TEARS THAT IS SOOOOOOOOOO PRECIOUS IM GONNA START BAWLING he's so 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 & yn now knows its from hoon 🥺😭🥺🥺🥹🥹🥹

THE FUCKING DOORBELL. THE FUCKING WITCH. WHEN I GET MY HANDS ON HER IM GNA FUCK HER 🆙 !!!!!! no but can we talk about how yn stood up to her MY POOKIEPIE MY LOVE 🥹 she's so strong for that ❤️‍🩹 & riki n hoon 🥹 coming in to stand w her 😭 hoon just standing behind her supporting her, ready to step in anytime ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

oh im soo fucking that bitch up im filing my nails as i type rn im gna scratch her face and no one can stop me. its the fact riki still calls her mom and she goes and do shit like this. i just cant phantom how people like her call themselves parents. yn making that decision whilst she was still so young 💔 no one really should have been in that position in the first place

i know uve alrdy shown us this part in the wc update but it still HITS ME SO HARD "of all people in this world, it was your hands he had put his tiny heart into because he knew you’d always keep it safe and protected, only for your absence to scar him forever" im actually broken. & OF FUCKING COURSE ITS THE FREAKING WITCH THAT HAD SMTH TO DO WITH THE LETTER NOT REACHING HOON.

ill say it time and time again but the friendship dynamic u create in everyone of ur fic is so precious and beautiful 🤍 all of them will fight and stand by each other through the darkest of times 🫂

ive actually teared up reading this chapter 🥺 this was everything, u always amaze me with the ideas u have and the way u execute them 🤍 this chapter was worth its wait <3 i truly enjoy reading every single update and idk what else to say other than thank you for sharing the masterpiece that is cold hearts with us all 🤍🤍

have a very very good night zadie <3

oh my sweet souled lia 🥺

thank you SO much for this ask. i never know what to say when you guys send me messages like these because im just baffled by how much love and attention and support you guys not only send me but my characters. i think it's safe to say that i will keep this so close to my heart. it's such an honor to receive such amazing reactions to the things my characters experience and ik im rambling but like, seeing you all so invested in this smau makes me so happy and im so grateful for everything. thank you baby. i love and appreciate you so much 🥺🤍🩷☀️💐🌷

[scaredgirlsilly]

I'm aroace and coming up on my 1 year anniversary of engagement to my lovely fiance who is not aro or ace and I do not use the term qpp. I have the type of relationship that tends to cause a lot of arguments so when irl people or strangers ask I just say I'm straight. (There's also an added layer of confusion from some people since I'm an ace guy and that seems to be a hot button topic rn)

I tend not to share this because people who know that I'm aroace think that I was previously going through a phase when I say I love my partner. I do love my partner but I'm still aroace and it looks different and this is the first time I've ever felt so secure with another person and what we were able to create is beautiful because I stopped listening to people tell me what a relationship is or should be. And we work amazingly together.

-a fellow aro mutual still too nervous to talk about being aroace with my actual unsername (but wanted to show solidarity)

omg hiiiiiiii!!!! ::3

ok first off CONGRATS ON ALMOST A YEAR OH EM GEE!!!!!!!! thats awesome im glad you found someone you can be yourself with ^u^

and uh. the rest of this is gonna be gibberish sorry jfkshdksj i was literally walking around my kitchen last night when i first got this ask trying to figure out how to word what i want to say for like an hour or 2 😭😭

but like. i think alot of people dont understand just how *open* the terms aro and ace can really be. like. idk at least to me its kinda like nonbinary. like nonbinary is anything that doest strictyly fit into the gender binary. and thats. uh. A Fuck Ton Of Things jfkshdjsj. like im aro but i might honestly feel romantic attraction. but for me its my strong dislike of the idea of being in a relationship, along with like. almost being disillusioned with the very concept of romantic attraction. (and being sorta kinda poly??)

this is the part that is gonna be incomprehensible jfksjsks. but the way i think about it is almost like. idk a diagnosis jfkshdks (NOT to be the weirdos that are like "romance is an illness" i just want to describe the fact that the borders and definitions of these attractions are socially constructed)

like romantic attraction has a bunch of "symptoms" (again value neutral i canmot stress enough that im not like anti people who like romance hfkshdjsj) like yk liking someone a bunch or butterflies in their stomach or like. yk whatever doesnt matter you get what i mean. the different thoughts and feelings and experiences that typically come up when someone is romantically attracted to someone. what im saying is i dont think there is *actually* a single Romantic Feeling people get, i think a lot of people just have a very similar experience, and so it sort of becomes a seperate thing yk. there isnt actually a Romantic Emotion but its a combo of a bunch of stuff that alot of people experience close enough to each others experiences that it is helpful for it to be named something.

but like. then people assume the Thing is actually real. or not that it isnt real but like. that the Thing came first and is law. when really its just a bunch of components that commonly make up the thing. and so when you share alot of those components of the Thing (saying i love you or being in a relationship that isnt a qpr with an allo person), people will say that you feel the Thing. but *you* know that you dont.

i dont really know where im going with this other than like. i wish people didnt see aro and ace people (specifically aro people jfksjsjs) as like. either you feel the Thing or you Dont. like 1. the Thing (romantic attraction) is something allo people cant even define comprehensibly and 2. the human experience is so varied that like. every single person is different and its v frustrating when people shit on others for not fitting into their idea of what that type of person is (shitting on aro people for not being what they think aro people are).

god this is nonsense im sorry but hopefully you understand what i mean. tl;dr everyone is different and everyones experiences of queer labels are different, id argue *especially* aro and ace people, and if you shit on aro and ace people for acting or feeling in a way you didnt expect or like, im killing you with a chainsaw

hopefully you can find other people who are not weird about your aroace-ness and if you ever need to talk about it id be down ^u^

[my-mt-heart]

Ok im gonna try to bring a bit of positivity here even if it might not seem like it at first lol. U might have seen (but i think u avoid twitter right?) Carol being attacked these last few hours/days regarding Sophia/Ed. How she supposedly let Sophia being sexually abused by Ed without doing nothing. How she screamed to Shane "stop!" and cried when he beat up Ed. Meaning she was weak and ridiculous, again.

First of all i think (correct me if im wrong) that its considered canon that Ed didnt abuse (sexually, that is) Sophia... yet, because he died, but he would have had tried to had he lived because he saw her "growing up" and was a sick psycho. And Carol acted on it by having Sophia taken physically far away from her father if i recall well (dont have the exact scene in mind hence why im vague).

Second of all, this is bullshit obviously. Those people have never been abused and it shows. How its hard to leave, because you still love him and actually believe him when he says he wont hurt u again. Because he's a "great father" and "only" hit you and not ur children (its stastically rare i think but it does happen). I've worked with a lot of women beaten up by their husbands (and believe it or not, a few man with their wives too. Even husbands with husbands or wives with wives. Again, more rare but still here) and all combinations exist: women dont give a shit anymore, wont forgive, and only wants to leave and/or ptotect their children, woman who cant leave because they still see the "amazing" man he was for the first 10 years, or the first 3 years. Or says things like "he was beaten up when he was a child by his dad so its not his fault. "

ALL combinations exist, no one knows what its like to be in the head or the heart of a beaten 's wife/person, and no one should judge someone's way of coping with it, dealing with it, reacting to it. It is NEVER the victims fault, even if in the case of a beaten's wife, she stays with the husband.

Sorry, so, this disgression to say that Carol was insulted yesterday and so on for staying with Ed and not protecting Sophia.

The goods news (and here comes the positive part lol) is that for once, everyone was coming at these assholes (who, yes, happened to be Richonners, but NO, not all Richonners are this way, absolutely NOT).

And when i mean everyone, i mean even those who usually dont say shit when Carol (and therefore Melissa) is called ugly and/or too old for Daryl. Even those who dont ship caryl and/ or dont particularly like Carol are saying "ohh hell noo, too far, u re not victim blaming Carol here, absolutely not". Even the "kind of official fan accounts" followed by stars of the show.

So, while i wish she was defended more often already for the ageist and sexist part of the attacks she suffers, its still comforting to see that this time, everybody or almost see how too far they have gone and reacted accordingly.

Sorry if im clumsy in my way of writing or presenting things, english is not my native language, hope i did ok.

First of all, thank you for all you've done for survivors of domestic abuse and for sharing your insight. I heard about the incident through the grapevine and it was nice to go back and see all the support Carol was getting from all sides :)

Even though we have to be responsible for what we say on SM, I don't think it should just be left up to the fans to create a safer environment for them (and even cast and crew) to interact with each other. We should also put pressure on AMC to stop fueling the sexism, ageism, racism, etc. seen not just in one particular subset of the fanbase, but across the board. For example, how about making Carol the same size as Daryl in the key art so people can literally see her as a lead character? How about abandoning the ambiguous language around Caryl's relationship so people can understand that, yes, a middle-aged woman with gray hair can be the middle-aged male lead's love interest and vice versa? How about hiring someone who actually supports their characters and their relationship to run the official SM accounts? That's the kind of change I'd love to see.

[clairvoylance]

I wish to know your side order ideas :)

i'm so sorry. im procrastinating so hard and i just latched onto this.

ok so i think the mission is going to be to save marina. she's either been brainwashed or unleashed something (probably coral or black ink-- more on that later) and got seperated from eight and pearl. eight and pearl are probably going to be the ones to save her (with maybe an appearance by marie cause of that one screenshot with maybe her leg). they're probably going to have to stop a ancient creature (dinosaur?) as the final boss.

so as far as marina being semi absent (def not completely cause i doubt nintendo is that stupid) is because when you pause the trailer at the right time, there is a colorful shot where marina is looking out to the distance surprised. the first thing to notice here is that the picture is like, full of color, something you don't see in many other trailer shots, which shows that she's not in the same place as eight (or the possible new agent) is. also, she's surprised. i think this is either hinting at a possible brainwashing (it would be expected with the amount of times its happened, but likely enough) or she did an oopsie and unleashed the final boss. i think it's more likely she accidently unlocked something because as i mentioned with what the boss will probably be, it seems ancient. something ancient probably isn't going to brainwash her because the two times we've seen brainwashing in this series are with technology. something that may be before splatoon modern era tech likely wouldn't brainwash her. or, nintendo could break these ideas and just go with it, because they can do what they want. just a thought about why they probably wouldn't. finally, as far as the marina picture, there's a weird kind of... barcode? watermark? thing on the bottom. it's kind of glitchy and distorted, which makes me think it's going to be a brainwashing thing, but also it makes sense for her unleashing something.

as for pearl being the mentor character in the story, the picture of her has the perspective of looking up. and, no offence to pearl, but for her to be literally looking down on someone, they probably have to be laying down. i'm assuming this person is eight because the background looks exactly like the place that the trailer mainly shows. marie might be another mentor character because of the one shot with her leg in the elevator, but still, i think pearl will be the main one.

and as far as the villian, i think it'll be some kind of ancient/dino/coral villian. as far as the coral goes, it's pretty obvious if you've seen any theory videos on this trailer-- the entire place has a bleached coral vibe. the trees in the square look like dead coral, there's a brain (representing brain coral), and the entire place is bleached white. as far as the ancient part, my friend actually found this. if you go frame by frame on youtube (pressing the < or > keys on a computer; i didn't know this before he told me lmao) you can see a skeleton/bone creature. and we were looking for matches, and we found one!! literally, a wiki page!! for a creature (probably, i'm not an expert) alive when dinosaurs were!! so either it is a dinosaur, or has the themes and ancientness of one. because this was a more aquatic animal, it fits with the splatoon themes. also, this creature had a very evil vibe (if you've played fire emblem 3h, think sylvain's crest spear (cant remember the name rn) cause that was the first thought i had when i saw this thing). and, because it seemed so ancient (and has a literal glowing red eye where there should be a socket-- no totk trailer vibes here lmao) i think it's not something that was created by anyone or just another villian like mr grizz-- but something marina unlocks.

thank you for coming to my tedtalk lmao. im totally not procrastinating my annotated bib, noo thats someone else

[amodernpersephone]

top five things you love about eichi?

HNG. OK IM ANSWERING THIS NOW BC IM NORMAL . Cut bc its LONG AS FUCK

1. he's got soooo many issues (ok on a srs note i do love how much potential there is always left in his character bc hes not the "got beaten by the good guys, proceeds ro alter entire world view to fit theirs" because despite that eichi firmly believes his actions are in the right and he is!!! what difference does he have from the eccentrics who sought to fix yumenosaki but were incapable of breaking a system forcing them to be caged? eichi merely acted upon his words and decided that if these idols were to grow unafraid of how the entertainment industry would break them then by fucking god, eichi will have it done himself. his whole morality hinges on the idea that he has the means to reshape this world and he will act upon those means because he views his actions in the right!! yet he knows he's hurt people and it's hurt him just as much, but what is a little bloodshed to a victorious war? and ill never ever stop claiming that they MAY have dethroned eichi but they didn't succeed. yumenosaki was changed. the systen was broken. eichi managed to create his poisoned idol heaven, even for just a few minutes. and in that, he won.)

2. his design!! i say it a lot but again i just rly like yellow and blue and he has both in his color scheme. i also love fine's outfits and his outfits in general (ESPECIALLY HIS PRIMAVERA AND DINER LIVE OUTFITS. those won my heart) his expressions are always so . genuine and warm to me no matter what people say how can you fool me into thinking this baby little thing has committed so many war crimes? hm? no.

3. oohhh girl are you insane because youre boyfriend is also insane. GOD DO I FUCKING LOVE WATAEI. its not even funny anymore theyre practically stitched onto my brain stem ive known them for so long they might as well be my neighbors. idk. its just the way theyre both each other's missing puzzle and how they slowly try their best to grow out of the idea that wataru is only in fine to experience the exhilerating thrill of eichi's insanity and that eichi can and will be inevitably betrayed by wataru and he would be broken beyond repair, sure, but he wouldn't hate wataru for it, he could never resent something he loved wholeheartedly. its just the way theyve slowly consumed one another and it takes just a little more for them to realize that "the mask is yours, and as is i" and "if you were to betray me, i could never hate you." and just. wataru admired eichi when he was the infallible emperor who executed him mercilessly but he loved eichi when he stared at his performances as though he carried the stars themselves and eichi envied wataru from the electromagnetic screen, his savior enigma that only made him burn at his own contempt and the nature of his situation but he loved wataru when he held his hand and pressed a loving kiss against his palm and glowed alongside him in every performance as though he was no longer perfect, or unreal, yet here and now, hand in hand, loving him just as he once did. they are both such perfect absolute halves of one another that they would and could devote their lives into each other wholeheartedly. ough.

4. man's got an iv drip sticking into his soul every which way and so do i . ik its normal to ne drawn to characters with similar situations such as yourself but eichi resonated w me straight into a paraself bc. i too fell got a crush on my gf after hearing her sing a few times in my hospital. his struggle w his illness is probably the closest experience to mine in fiction which gets surreal a few times i have to turn off my device. i just love how its an integral part of his character and debilitates him in a lot of ways but it's equally one of his most notable traits and the part of him that draws so many into his side.

5. hes a sad pathetic baby girl and hes mine. hes trans in ways i cant even explain. hes trying to change, maybe be a little less manipulative and scheming and hes failing but sure. he wants to fully realize that wataru is tangible and by his side just as he is to wataru. hes doing his best. hes failing miserably. he makes me wanna cry. its been years since i came into enstars and ive gotten legal problems bc of it and eichi specifically thrice now and . yeah. i could never P anyone as much as him. i joke abt hating him and shit but ultimately hes a massive part of my life and i love him wholeheartedly. my eichi <3

[onmymasa22]

Her correcting u just means she doesnt have adhd. She just doesnt understand it. She doesnt know what its really like. She doesnt know how badly it feels to have adhd. Cuz im speaking from experience and ur not.

Man i can understand why u guys aren't married. I dont even like being arund u and im not looking to sleep with u. Talk about a guy who is.

Ur so busy? Please. Tell me about it. Because im busy getting two degrees in a foreign language, while working with old people with mental illness, working on creating an art exhibit in a few months, im just

Graphite brown- desert colors

Or good dirt colors

Charcoal- black

Charcoal brown

Grafite

Oil pastels

Charcoal

Watercolor paper

Ink

Silk painting

Sag sun

Taurus moon

Leo risinh

My new perspective:

Mashiach will come and ill live forever so really 27 is a blip.

Is there something wrong with me that i dont see sleeping around and getting guys off as something enticing. Like i feel like even if i wasnt religious im not numb. Theres a lack of sensitivity to bodies and who gets to be around them. Theres a cockiness.

I am an artist. That means i love vintage pieces

Im lucky to be alive

I like my bright red coat

Tell me u have adhd without saying u have adhd:

Mad sensory issues. Ive always had issues with the way things feel, but lately ive just been accepted all my sensory quirkiness. Skirts have become uncomfortable so ive into dresses with pants that have an elastic top. So it looks like i got dressed but the clothes feel more like pajamas and can be looser. I have a certain toothpaste but they stopped selling it so i went to three stores trying to find a toothpaste i could tolerate. Sucked it up that mine just isnt a thing anymore, bought toothpaste, tried it to see if the taste and texture would bother me and it turns out i kind of like it more maybe. It's creamier if that makes sense. Sensory issues mean i cant wear belts, its just too restricting. And i want

I have different modes. I have a mode when im on. When im funny and crazy and wild and will do anything to make the people around me laugh. I will make a fool of myself and be a complete goofball. Thats when im on. When im off, i dont need to be the funniest person in the room. I dont need to be loud. I dont need to make people laugh. I just need to make ppl feel seen and heard. I listen. Im sensitive to things and gentle in the way i ask questions. I receive information and just in the moment.

Eat a good amount of food

Can we just take a second: i love my mom, but when i was growing up, my grandmother told me about bras and periods. And i had an obsession about bracess.

Ok. This is me accepting the fact that a big part of my paycheck will go to art supplies. Thats it. As an artist i need to make pretty things and the materials fpr those pretty things require going to a claustrophobic shop amd buying overpriced tziyud because thats life. Breathe in. Breathe out. Accept it and move on. You'll be happy woth it when u see all the pretty stuff ull make. For now, just hand the devil ur credit card.

When ur last pair of boots were broken in by a friend and ur wore them for five years until they fell apart. And now ur wearing new boots amd trying to break them in