#I BELIEVE that Ted would come over if the world was ending and even before that! He'll change his mind after a few months...

[looking-for-a-sword]

But if the world was ending You'd come over, right? You'd come over and you'd stay the night Would you love me for the hell of it? All our fears would be irrelevant If the world was ending You'd come over, right? The sky'd be falling and I'd hold you tight And there wouldn't be a reason why We would even have to say goodbye -JP Saxe & Julia Michaels

[pray4saint]

SAPNAP PLS nsfw headcannons.... him taking the bdsm tests, what's his sex drive? I just know he presses himself against you every time he passes you, but does he follow through ;)))

FOUND UR ACCC YESTERDAY and I'm acc in love like we both love dteam and marauders it's such a rare combination and I've never seen anyone love both before! ( like me LOL) do you take anons? 🥺

sapnap nsfw headcanons

masterlist & descrip. rated r. 16+. dirty talk. sapnap taking the bdsm test.

a/n. i would be happy to write more horndog texan for you / the only other person i know who writes mcyt & marauders is my younger cousin but they're fifteen so we don't interact online but lmk if you'd like their @ (& yes, i do take anons, the current anons i have are 💚 & 🦥)

as you said anon, sap absolutely presses against you when he passes by you, even when there's plenty of space to just go around, he does it to rile you up

does he follow through?? sometimes he does it for buildup for later that night, to make you all whiny and needy for him

but other times when you call him out for it, it's a 25/75 of if he won't follow through or he will (just to clarify, 25% of the time he won't, 75% he does)

when you call him out and he follows through though.. it's rough, it's kinky, it's dirty and it is hot and heavy

i mean more degradation when you call him out, more slapping if you're into that, hair pulling, messy, sloppy kisses

”god, such a slut for me aren't ya?” he pulls his lips from yours, a string of saliva thinning the farther he gets from your mouth, and it finally breaks when he licks his bottom lip. ”sap, please-” ”isn't this what you wanted babe?” he tangles a hand in your hair, ”to be fucked senseless under me like a whore?” he tugs at your hair, making you whine and beg him to just fuck you already.

sapnap's sex drive i'd say is above average, but not by a whole lot

i think if he can, he'll find a way to fuck you every day or every other day, but if you're not feeling it or you have your period or you just don't want to, it's not the end of the world for him

his sex drive is based solely on his attraction to you; when he was single he had a low sex drive but when you two started dating it jumped wayy up

OH OH OH my brain goes brrrrr for this shit: when you've been going at it for awhile, his southern accent becomes more pronounced with every word he says

”fuck- darl' you're doing so- s'good f'me.” his breath fans hot against your ear and down your neck and he fucks into you, drawing moan after moan out of you.

lots of praise this way, about how well you take him, how perfect you look under him or on top of him, about how much he loves you and how good you treat him

i think despite his above average sex drive, he still likes taking his time, teasing you, building up foreplay, because it all adds to the experience for you and that's all he really wants, for you to be happy

sapnap believes in being begged, for anything really, to be touched, to be fucked a certain way, to cum, yk he just gets it

also some sub!sapnap for you // sub!sap who begs to be touched when he's horny and if you say no he just can't help it, he'll touch himself even if he isn't allowed to

sub!sapnap, rutting into you while he begs to be praised >>>>

”m'i doing good? please tell me i'm doing good..” while his pelvis presses against yours over and over again. ”yes- sap fuck, you're doing so good, such a good boy for me.” his hips begin to stutter at your words.

thank you for coming to my ted talk

pray4saint© do not copy, translate or repost my work without my express permission.

[sunlight-fics]

Hiii can you do a fluff alphabet for Hozier ? It's okay if u don't, love youuuu

YES!! Absolutely and here you go!! I’m so sorry for making you wait so long for it, I got super busy with life. I hope you enjoy and I tried my best!🤍

———————————————————————

Fluff Alphabet

Hozier X reader

A = Acts of Kindness

* He would definitely bring home flowers after a long tour. Before leaving the house he would write little notes and leave them all over. If it’s been a long stressful day for you and you have no motivation he would cook dinner for you and it would could either the best dinner or the worst.

B = Boyfriend

* He really wasn’t sure if he would make a good partner, but damn he was the best. He’s the type to take it slow and just enjoy the little moments.

C = Cuddling

* THE CUDDLING KING, let’s rest your head on his chest and either rubs your back or runs his fingers through your hair.

D = determined

* Absolutely determined to do anything that makes you feel comfortable after a long day. It doesn’t matter what but he is determined!

E = encouragement

* “Darling I know it seems hard, but you’re a tough person. You’ve got this, and I believe in you no matter what!” Would hands down something he would say!!!

F = funny

* Making little jokes here and there after a stressful situation or even just making jokes about his past mistakes and just laughing with you about them.

G = gentle

* Let’s say you’ve got some trauma from a past relationship or something and you’ve moved on to Andrew. If you ever just so happened to have a trauma reaction or response from something he accidentally did or said, he would notice and instantly fix whatever was wrong. After it was all fixed he would be the most gentle person you’ve ever met. Gentle cuddles, kisses, hugs, ect.

H = hugs

* Bear hugs or the most gentle hugs. No questions asked. Just that.

I = ideal boyfriend

* Would and probably is the ideal partner.

J = journeys

* Spontaneous and random journey. Whether it be into the forest behind his house or “Hey I just bought us plane tickets to Brazil. Let’s get packed because we’ve gotta get to the airport soon.”

K = kindness

* the kindest person to everyone he’s ever met. But especially kind to you, no matter what he’s always been great about showing kindness.

L = love

* “My love” he would whisper gently to you in the late night hours while running his fingers through your hair and when the world was asleep, but he was still awake.

M = motivation

* What type of motivation? Well either Ted talks or random. It can be the most inspirational and motivating thing you’re ever hear or it could be motivational.

N = neat

* Is he a neat person? Great question. But probably on the weekends or when he’s not on tour he would probably take the time to clean.

O = Observational

* You would observe him as he goes through a normal day not on tour. See what he likes, what he doesn’t, and in between. He would do the same for you

P = protective

* A fairly protective partner, always watching out for you and you do the same for him. (NFWMB)

Q = quite

* After a long stressful and loud day it’s nice to come home to peace and calm settings. Specially when it’s just listening to the records and cuddling on the couch or just laying in bed with your head resting on his chest

R = respect

* Even if you both just started dating he would have already have so much respect for you. But the thing is, show respect to earn respect and in the end his respect for you grows and your respect for him also grows.

S = sleep

* Sleep is important for the both of you, especially after long weeks. Lazy weeks tend to happen a lot, just some so simple as laying cuddled up next to him or admiring him as he sleeps.

T = trust

* Trust builds a relationship, and you both trust each other so much. He trust you with a lot. For example, his house when he’s on tour, his dog (Elwood), his phone, and so many other things.

U = unique

* What type of unique interest does he have or any random unique facts or traits.

V = vulnerable

* It takes AWHILE for him to open up to you but once he finally opens up and becomes more vulnerable and comfortable with you, a lot of actions makes more sense. You feel like you can finally help him and help him see that he a wonderful person and deserves nothing but the best and nothing but love. Real love.

W = wisdom

* Both of you are equally wise and great at giving advice to each other. But sometimes the wisdom isn’t taken in the way that was intended so that leads to one of you feeling offended or upset. But because they’re such a strong relationship it’s easy to talk through it.

X = (couldn’t find a word😐👍)

Y = yearning

* The yearning for you when he’s away or even when you’re away is insane. It gets to the point where he starts right letters or poems to give to you once you return.

Z = Zealful

* You both show nothing but passion for each other and you wouldn’t have it any other way.

[pinkeoni]

Bruh. The episode name is "the vanishing of holly wheeler". Not only did they copy Will's episode name and gave it to Holly but they also are intending to give the kidnapping plotline to her character. And we know that should follow up by the other wheelers trying to save her. It is basically making the wheelers byers.

First of all, that list of episode titles come from an unofficial source. Could be real, could be fake. And the name of the title was "The Vanishing of *BLANK* Wheeler with no real confirmation as to the number of letters in the first name since the leak was given verbally, which was then relayed over the internet with "*****" making people believe that it could be Holly.

Second of all, rehashing season one with Holly instead of Will doesn't make any sense and likely improbable and here's why:

I don't see the narrative reason to have Holly go missing. Sure, it could still happen, but I wouldn't see the necessity for it.

The purpose of Will going missing in season 1 was to act as an inciting incident to get all of the other characters involved. The story was driven by Will's disappearance, thus why it was one of the first things we saw happen in the show and why it was deserving of the first episode title.

What would be the purpose of Holly going missing in season 5? Everything has already been set up at the end of season 4. The Upside Down is coming into Hawkins and Vecna has plans to basically take over the world. Max is in a coma and Will can still feel Vecna's left nut. That's reason enough to get the characters involved. We don't need Holly to go missing for the characters to want to take action. Also, if you wanted to get Karen and Ted involved, they already have their two other children involved with the supernatural, so they can get into it that way tangentially.

I think that people are overestimating the reasoning for wanting to replace Holly with an older and more experienced actress, I don't necessarily believe that this recast means that something terrible will happen to her, I just think she was replaced because there is a time skip and Holly is going to need to say more lines than "Mommy, it's snowing!" The original twins cast to play Holly were cast as toddlers, and Nell has more experience actually performing and saying lines. But I don't think that the Duffers are going to end their final season with giving irreparable trauma to a young girl without the chance for that to be resolved in later seasons.

What purpose would Vecna have with taking Holly? What would he even want with her? Vecna targeted specific characters for a specific purpose last season, he doesn't just kidnap little girls for the hell of it. That would be a waste of his time.

He doesn't need to kidnap Holly to get to Will, and personally I hate hate HATE the idea of Will going into the Upside Down in order to get to Holly. Will already has ties to Vecna. Why would he need to kidnap someone to get to him? Also, why would it be Holly? Why not Joyce or Jonathan? What significant relationship does Will have with this little girl who I'm pretty sure he doesn't have any screen time with?

I think people outside of fandom forget that the show has not given the audience a reason to really care about Holly other than the fact that she is a little girl. She has had no significant lines, no significant screen presence, and no significant story line. And all of a sudden the final season of the show hinges on finding this girl that the audience doesn't give a shit about. Okay.

And before someone tries to straw man me and say "Oh, so you're saying that the Wheeler's doesn't have ANY connection to the supernatural and isn't important?" Of course I think they are important. They are as important any character is, they all have their own roles in the story. But the Wheeler's involvement with the supernatural has always been tangential. Barb was taken so Nancy got involved. Will was taken and Mike found El so Mike got involved. Karen is likely to now get involved since her children are now involved. I am making my assertion based on what I am seeing in the show. They are involved with the supernatural because they make themselves involved. Both Will and El are tied to the supernatural in a more direct way, and based on what the show has told me as well as what official sources (The Duffer's themselves), they are more integral to the supernatural plot than any Wheeler. Point blank.

[itsclydebitches]

I'm preparing myself for the personal disappointment of Ted going back home to Kansas (even though I don't believe that's his home anymore) and that Trent will see him off in a ruby slippers shirt, especially since Lance has worn one before and we now know a lot of Trent's shirts are coming from his closet:

But in writing another meta I've been thinking a lot about Ted Lasso's clothing, particularly how it is used to connect with others and showcase growth. Sometimes that attempt is a failure and the growth is a detriment to the character, such as Nate trying to copy Roy's all black suit, and sometimes it's a success and the growth is something to celebrate, like Roy finding a compromise between his and Phoebe's tastes with his dark-colored, tie-die t-shirt. Beyond the issue that I don't want Ted to go back to Kansas at all (not unless the intention is to have him realize that Richmond is his true home now), a Dorothy shirt would fall flat for me because there's no in-universe connection to Ted. We as the audience understand the allusion because we've been picking up on hints since Season 1: Ted makes a quip about not being in Kansas anymore, he holds high scores on a Wizard of Oz pinball machine, he's surrounded by other allusions such as an emotionless man in need of a heart (Roy), a scared lion who rejects being a panda (Rebecca), and the comedic, presumed idiot who does in fact have a brain (Jamie). But all of that exists on an analytical level. In-world, Ted hasn't identified with Dorothy and what few connections there are -- such as that acknowledgement that he feels out of his depth in a new world -- are no longer accurate three seasons later, after a hell of a lot of growth. Unlike the suit and the shirts that exist overtly on screen as a way to say, "These characters are sharing a connection," Trent talking to Ted in a Dorothy shirt would feel too removed from textual!Ted and textual!Trent to have the same impact. This shirt totally sums up his story!... provided you've done the work to interpret all the easily missed hints and ignored the ways in which a Wizard of Oz ending would (imo) be a regression for Ted.

With an acknowledgment that I'm playing with all this through the assumption that Trent's shirt will have something to do with Ted, rather than us just getting an Overtly Queer shirt to show that Trent has fully embraced who he is, I've been hemming and hawing over what I'd give him instead. In some ways, Ted is notable for his lack of distinct fashion. He wears Richmond gear 70% of the time and the rest is plain colored long-sleeved shirts and collared shirts with polos. It's a distinctly Ted look to be sure (passionate and athletic vs. soft, comfortable, and mildly professional while still feeling approachable), but there's less material to work with than, say, Keeley's vibrate, quirky wardrobe; or Rebecca's preference towards outfits that emphasize her power as a kind of shield: wealth, beauty, her height; or -- of course -- Trent's move from buttoned-up journalist to queer bracelet, queer mug, queer style icon t-shirts. I can't think of anything Trent could wear off the top of my head that would a) be within his "vibe" and b) scream "I'M DECLARING MY SUPPORT AND/OR ROMANTIC LOVE FOR TED FUCKING LASSO."

Except, of course, for a "BELIEVE" shirt.

While I love and fully agree with Ted's speech about how belief needs to come from within and, thus, their sign is not actually necessary, a part of me is still disappointed that "BELIEVE" is no longer a visual part of the club. I'd be more willing to accept letting it go if we hadn't seen that Ted himself still relies on those visual reminders. Not only does he choose to put the sign up in the first place rather than simply telling the boys to believe in themselves, but back when Nate was doubting their chances in Ted's apartment, Ted sprints to his bathroom to retrieve one of mini signs he, obviously, keeps on hand and presumably sees every morning, soon as he gets up. It's important to him, not just the message, but the physicality of the reminder itself, so I've been expecting/hoping for the message to return in a new form by the end of the season.

Granted, that little moment was a while ago and it's possible that the writers didn't realize the implications it would have when Ted later ripped up the sign. However, another reason why I don't think my expectation is completely hopeless is because of the Season 3 promo, wherein all the Richmond family make their own BELIEVE signs. Forgetting a small gag back in Season 1 or 2 is understandable, but the promotion for the latest season? Why in the world would our advertising emphasize -- and celebrate! -- all the characters creating signs of their own if the message was meant to be, "Let the sign go. It's no longer needed"?

We didn't get this scene in the show proper, but it still speaks volumes that they filmed a moment where every character puts their own spin on the BELIEVE sign, using it to highlight their personality. Then, we end with a shot of Ted's touched approval as he talks about feeling seen.

Chronologically, Trent would have been around for all this. There's no need for the team to make their own signs until they realize the original has been torn and, obviously, Trent had become a part of the family by then. He's the one who discovered how the sign was torn in the first place. So if we read the promo as canonical, even if it didn't end up in an episode, why wouldn't Trent have joined in with everyone else? Thing is, he doesn't have a locker to hang a sign on, or even an office to put it in, and given that he's worn the same two bracelets and consistently used the same mug, there's really only one way that Trent shows his personality:

Shirts.

Some of which are notably brightly colored with blocky text referencing American-style learning.

I don't want Trent to walk into the finale with a Dorothy shirt whose importance only exists on a subtexual level and heralds Ted leaving the actual home he's worked to build. I want Trent to strut out in a bright yellow shirt with BELIEVE across the front, announcing to the world that, yes, he believes in the Lasso Way. Give me the implication that he had this made when everyone was personalizing their signs. Give me a fully confident "dork" who's willing to excitedly proclaim his love and support without fear of censor. Give me a BELIEVE reminder that's now tailored to the individual and can be worn or safely tucked away as needed. Give me the possibility (because it's not gonna be canon😭) that Trent is in love with Ted and he's going to display that in the most overt but-not-actually-saying-it way possible.

He sees Ted and he loves what he sees.

Dorothy and her allusion don't exist in the textual show proper and they're definitely not connected to Trent's relationship with Ted. What is though? The very first words Trent said about Ted that weren't an insult, accusation, snide remark, or disbelieving question:

"I can't help but root for him."

What better way to take Trent full circle than to let him literally wear his heart on his sleeve, shouting in bright colors and with a noticeable vibe that yes, he does believe in Ted Lasso.

[mollyjeanne615]

Could you please write a song adapting Ted and Charlotte’s conversation/flirting/argument in The Guy Who Didn’t Like Musicals before he leaves her alone with Sam?

Like… there’s the genuine love between them; their respective issues, fears and unhealthy beliefs getting in the way of it; their regret that they can’t just be happy together while also not taking action to make that happen; the stress of being stuck in an alien zombie apocalypse; Charlotte’s grief over and Ted’s resentment of Sam; and their difficulty actually communicating all the previous things. And of course, the sexual tension. I just think that all of those layers interplaying would make a really good song. Especially since their dynamic wasn’t explored much in the show.

There could even be a coda where Ted, after leaving, muses that he could have done better, but he’s been very careful to never give her reason to expect better from him, so she’ll get over it. They’ll be back to their version of normal soon enough (messy as it is). So he doesn’t need to go back in there and apologize or say some heartfelt shit or anything. Then the final notes are the first ones of “You Tied up My Heart”.

I say this every time but holy SHIT this was fun

So I tried to get as much of this prompt into one song as I could - it doesn't cover the entire scene, so there would be a little bit of dialogue between this and "You Tied Up My Heart," but I think it captures a lot of their relationship and connection. There could also totally be some underscoring from this going into the next song in a full production. (Also this wouldn't be in a full production cause they wouldn't be singing, but I dream.) I also cheated a bit with the orchestrations - I've been trying to make them as playable by the original bands of the shows as possible, but for this I switched out the bass part for a second guitar cause why not. There's a little bit of "Time Bastard" in the opening synth part, and there's a pretty big motif/reprise/stolen chord progression in the bridge of the song - I was trying to think of other Hatchetfield songs relating to Spankoffski stories and sexual temptation and all that, and I think this one did the trick lol. I'm super proud of the demo for this one - it came out somewhere between "Dead Girl Walking" from Heathers and "D.O.A." from The Lightning Thief, and I'm really in love with it. Hope y'all enjoy!

In the Worst Way

CHARLOTTE: Ted!  I can’t believe you’re thinking about that at a time like this, the whole world could be coming to an end!

TED: Yeah.  Exactly.  The whole world’s gone to shit and you’re worried about what someone else might think about you?

CHARLOTTE: Well, when you put it like that…

TED:

You think you’re such a good, good girl You pick your nails, you hide your stress But it’s the end of the fucking world So you can afford to decompress

You put your image on a throne You crumple underneath the crown But you need to grow a backbone Before it breaks you down

You’ve been in bed with a scumbag But baby, can’t you see You have a chance to upgrade To a sleazeball like me

So if I’m dying tonight I’ve got a great way to cap off my life I’ll be going out doing the thing I love Screwing around with another man’s wife Maybe there’s better things I should worry about today But I’d rather be here with you So let me say I want you in the worst way

CHARLOTTE: Oh, you’re such a horny bastard.

TED: Always have been, always will be.

CHARLOTTE:

My body’s telling me to run My mind is saying you’re no good But I need something just for fun So I guess I probably should

I’ve wished upon so many stars To be more confident and crude So I’ll embrace the love that’s ours With a badass attitude

TED: Okay!

CHARLOTTE:

There’s something in my gut that says You might still be alright Cause I need someone to love me Before we bite the dust tonight

So if I’m dying today I’m gonna let you lead me astray I might be meeting my maker pretty soon So I’ll get down on my knees and pray Maybe there’s better things I should worry about today But I’d rather be here with you So let me say I want you in the worst way

TED:

Ooh, I want you in the worst way, yeah

TED AND CHARLOTTE:

My happiness is coming first, I won’t be on my own Let all those without sin cast the first stones I’ll do all I can so you’ll never be alone At least until we kick the bucket

CHARLOTTE:

But should I just stick with the devil I know

TED AND CHARLOTTE:

Well, you know what, fuck it!

They make out passionately as a rocking electric guitar solo backs them up.

TED AND CHARLOTTE:

So if I’m dying right now I’ll spend this moment breaking a vow There’s nowhere else I need to be And I needed a little break anyhow Maybe there’s better things I should worry about today But I’d rather be here with you So let me say Yeah, let me say I want you in the worst way

TED:

Let’s let the chips fall where they may

TED AND CHARLOTTE:

I want you in the worst way

CHARLOTTE:

My husband’s brains fell out today

TED AND CHARLOTTE:

I want you in the worst way Maybe there’s better things I should worry about today But I’d rather be here with you So let me say I want you in the worst way

They kiss again on the button of the song.

[dwobbitfromtheshire]

Stuck Between a Jock and a Metalhead

Summary: Nancy, on a whim, decides to visit Steve at Scoops Ahoy, which leads to her overhearing confessions from Steve that leads her to think about the decisions she's made. A few days later, she decides to come back. She finds him being hit on by the town freak. What's a girl to do? Oh, get stuck in a freezer with the both of them.

Chapter One - Chapter Two - Chapter Three - Chapter Four - Chapter Five - Chapter Six - Chapter Seven - Chapter Eight - Chapter Nine - Chapter Ten - Chapter Eleven - Chapter Twelve - Chapter Thirteen - Chapter Fourteen - Chapter Fifteen - Chapter Sixteen - Chapter Seventeen - Chapter Eighteen - Chapter Nineteen - Chapter Twenty - Chapter Twenty-One

@nightmareglitter

Chapter Twenty-Two

Nancy sighed as she sat with Steve in the waiting room. They had been looked over by doctors and interviewed for what seemed like several hours by the cops. Eddie, Dustin, and Wayne were with Claudia in her hospital room. Nancy and Steve decided to give them some time to themselves, knowing that they were probably all going to be family soon, judging by the way Wayne looked at Claudia. Nancy tried not to think about Patrick and instead focused on the pain in her upper lip. It was busted, but she didn't need stitches. Luckily, Steve didn't need any and that he didn't get another concussion, but his eyes looked pretty bruised. His lip was also busted.

Nancy glanced around the room at the ashen and wounded faces. Ted was wearing his extra pair of glasses over his broken nose. Karen was holding onto a sleepy Holly and clutching Ted's arm while glancing over at Nancy. Robin was between her two parents while Lucas was pressed between his. Pretty much every parent was clutching their children tightly but none more tightly than Susan Mayfield with Max, who looked torn between hating it and loving it. There was a bruise on Max's cheek. Everyone looked scared.

"Eddie and Dustin said they'd be back, right?" Robin asked. "To tell us how Claudia is?"

"Right," Nancy said. "You know, I need to stretch my legs. Plus, I need to try the Byers again. Does anyone want anything?"

A lot of them were silent, still in shock as they thought about the poor boy and the attack that happened inside Claudia's home.

"You know, I could go with you, and we could bring back a variety of snacks," Steve said.

"I could use a stretch myself," Robin said.

Karen reached out and grabbed Nancy's hand, holding it tightly. She knew what her mother was saying even if she couldn't say the world.

"I'm sure Mike's fine," Nancy said and gave her mother a kiss on the cheek.

She leaned down and kissed Holly on the head before doing the same with her father. Nancy left the waiting room with Steve and Robin.

"Oh my God! I love my parents, but my mother was squeezing me tight as if I were going to disappear into thin air and I get it, I do, but I just need to breathe," Robin said.

"I get it," Nancy said softly. "Do you think I did the right thing by telling them?"

"I think it would have been a lot worse if the parents hadn't all been there," Steve said.

"They needed to know, Nance," Robin replied.

"I saw you jump on that jock. That was impressive," Nancy said.

"He was beating the shit out of my platonic soulmate. Nobody does that," Robin said, holding her head up high.

"She tried to bite off his ear," Steve said.

"Jesus, I can't believe I missed that," Nancy said.

The trio turned down the hallway to find Dustin and Eddie down at the end of it. They were jumping up and down in excitement. When they spotted the others, Dustin quickly nudged Eddie to stop. Eddie grinned and skipped down the hallway towards them. He skidded to a stop in front of Steve and Nancy.

"There they are, my beautiful loves!" Eddie exclaimed joyfully.

"Jesus, Eddie, what drugs are you on?" Robin asked.

"I sold drugs, I didn't do them. . .well, not all of the time," Eddie grinned.

"So, what's got you so happy?" Nancy asked.

"Well, the sight of my gorgeous lovers, of course," Eddie said and pulled them to his side.

"Okay, seriously, Eddie, what's going on?" Steve asked.

"I can't tell you that," Eddie said.

"It's classified," Dustin grinned.

"It's for us to know and you to find out at a later date," Eddie said. "Per Claudia and Wayne's instructions."

"You can't even tell us?" Nancy asked sweetly, her eyes going wide.

"Okay. Well, that's not fair," Eddie said.

"Come on, Eddie, we're your life partners," Steve pouted, his eyes going wide.

"The lip and the eyes? Jesus. You're both really going for it," Eddie scowled. "I'm pretty sure this is an illegal move."

"Come on, Eddie, stay strong," Dustin encouraged from behind him.

Robin cackled and moved behind Eddie to stand next to Dustin.

"You know exactly how weak you are, Munson," Robin said. "You already know you're going to fold."

"Don't listen to her, Eddie, you're stronger than that!" Dustin exclaimed.

"We'll do whatever you want, Eddie," Nancy said suggestively.

"Wherever you want," Steve said, rubbing his hand across his chest.

"Okay, I do not like where this is going," Dustin said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"You'll do that thing that I've been asking you to do for ages?" Eddie asked, his eyes wide with excitement.

"Okay, I really don't like where this is going," Dustin said and covered his ears. "Eddie, come on!"

"I figured you of all people would appreciate what I've been wanting them to do," he said, narrowing his eyes at him.

"I do not!" He squeaked.

"Really, because I've been asking them to play D&D for forever," Eddie said, and Dustin dropped his hands in shock. "What did you think we've been implying?"

"N-nothing. Steve, Nance, you'd be willing to play with Hellfire?" Dustin asked, and they nodded. "Hmm, maybe you should fold. Maybe I should fold."

Suddenly, the door opened beside them and Wayne popped his head out of the room.

"Do not tell him, Dustin. Think about your mother, please," Wayne said. "And stop it."

Wayne went back in with a sigh. Nancy giggled against Eddie's chest.

"We were just fucking with you," Nancy said.

"Sorry, baby," Steve grinned.

"You're both sleeping on the couch," he scowled.

Suddenly, the door opened, and Wayne pulled Steve into the room. A moment later, Steve came out with a huge grin on his face and tears in his eyes.

"You know," Robin and Nancy said, narrowing their eyes at Steve.

"Yeah, and I'm not supposed to tell anyone else yet," Steve said, zipping his lips.

"Well, if Claudia wants to keep her secret, I guess I have to respect that," Nancy said, rolling her eyes. "Seeing how it doesn't seem dangerous at all."

"Well, you'll know soon enough, sweetheart," Eddie said. "Just know that Claudia is just fine."

"We're supposed to be getting snacks," Nancy said with a sigh. "I also need to try the Byers again."

"Well, there's a small room up ahead with chairs, a payphone, and snack machines," Eddie said. "I call it the stress eating room."

The group headed in that direction. When they entered the room, Eddie closed the door and leaned against it to give them privacy. Nancy gave a grateful look while she used the payphone and dialed the Byers number that she now knew by heart. She frowned as it rang and rang, but no one answered. She bit her lip as she thought about Mike and the conversation she had with him when she drove him home before he left for California.

"Nancy. . . " Mike sat in the passenger's seat, fidgeting nervously.

"Yeah?"

"Would you think less of me if I told you that I never loved El?" He asked.

Nancy had immediately pulled off to the side of the road and parked it.

"What?" She asked, turning her full attention to him.

"I mean, I loved her, but I don't think I was ever in love with her like a boy is supposed to be in love with a girl," Mike said. "And I think I was trying hard to be because that's what I thought I had to be, you know? Does any of this make sense?"

"I think I'm starting to get the clearer picture here," Nancy said with a smile. "It doesn't make you a bad person. You do love her. . .just in a different way, and that's okay. It's doesn't make your past relationship or your current one any less special."

There had been a long stretch of silence as he stared thoughtfully out the window.

"Nancy. . . I think I'm gay," he said, and then there was another pause. "No, I am gay."

Nancy smiled and reached over to take his hand.

"I love you. Thank you so much for telling me," Nancy said and pulled him into a hug. "I'm proud of you."

"It's okay, right?" Mike asked.

"It's more than okay. Come on, let's get you home."

Nancy cursed and slammed the phone down.

"Still no answer?" Dustin asked.

Nancy shook her head, afraid to speak, her mouth pursed as she struggled to keep the tears at bay. She felt a hand on her shoulder, and she looked up to find Steve standing there.

"He's going to be okay," Steve said.

"You don't know that," Nancy said, sniffling. "Can you just hold me?"

Steve nodded and pulled her against his chest. Nancy burrowed her face into his shirt, breathing in his scent and letting it calm her down. Eddie was soon pressed up against her back, holding them both and pressing kisses into her hair. Nancy let out a momentary sigh of relief. She tensed up when she felt raised voices coming closer to the room.

"But dad - !" A girl's voice exclaimed.

"Vickie, I know you're upset. I am, too, but don't you think I tried everything to get us into that funeral?" The man's floated through.

"I just want to say goodbye to Chrissy. She's our family. She's my cousin. Unlike Laura, all we ever did was love Chrissy and the fact that she's kept Matty and Chrissy from us for so long. . . We weren't even allowed at Matty's funeral either. It's just so fucked up!" Vickie shrieked.

"I know, baby. This is killing me, too. After her parents, I was the first person to hold both of them when they were born. I looked after Chrissy three days after her birth because Phil had to go to his brother's wedding, and Laura had to attend. I held her as she cried and soothed her when she had a nightmare. I held her right over my heart, just like I did with you," Vickie's dad struggled to speak. "When I get off of work, we'll throw our own little memorial, okay?"

"Okay," Vickie sniffled and paused. "Why did Laura hate them so much just for being different?"

"I don't know, baby. I wish I had the answers myself," he said, and then a pager went off. "Shit!"

"It's okay, dad, go save lives," Vickie said. "I'll get myself a snack."

They all looked at each other with panic in their eyes. This girl was going to come and know that they heard everything. It wasn't like there was any other way to escape the room, either. The door opened, and the first person the redhead looked at was Robin.

"Robin?" Vickie asked.

"Hey, Vickie," Robin said, trying to be casual.

Vickie looked around the room and winced as she wiped at the tears on her face.

"I guess you guys heard all that then," Vickie said.

Nancy rolled her eyes at Dustin and Eddie, who were looking at the ceiling.

"Yeah. We did. Sorry," Nancy said.

"It's okay. We weren't exactly quiet," Vickie said, and that's when she noticed Eddie. "Eddie?"

His head snapped to look at her, and he moved to wring his hands behind his back.

"Yeah?"

"They said they found Chrissy's body at your house," Vickie said.

"Yeah, that's what they told me too," he said quickly.

"You weren't there?" She asked.

"No, I was with my partners," Eddie said.

"Oh, you have your own business?" Vickie asked.

"Um, no, life partners," Eddie replied as Nancy and Steve leaned against him.

"I'm just not thinking clearly today," Vickie said, shaking her head. "That's cool, though. So, you have no clue what happened to Chrissy either?"

"Not really, no," Nancy said which was true.

"Damn," Vickie muttered.

"I'm sorry about your cousin," Robin said, finally said.

"Thanks," Vickie said and paused with a small smile. "Well, one good thing has happened today. I got to see you."

Robin's face turned a bright shade of red as she bit her lip.

"Yeah, I mean, me too," Robin said.

"I think I'm going to go home though, take a nap," Vickie said.

Suddenly, Robin surged forward and opened her mouth before closing it again.

"I could - I could walk you to your car if you want, you know, just in case," Robin said nervously.

"I'd like that," Vickie said with a smile.

Robin started to walk out the door with Vickie, but she glanced over her shoulder for a moment. To Nancy's amusement, Dustin gave her an encouraging thumbs up, grinning in delight. She laughed and shook her head, walking out with Vickie. Pretty soon, Steve, Eddie, and Dustin were arguing over which snacks to get. Nancy watched them, smiling softly. It was true that Dustin had always been her favorite, and maybe it was because she always thought Dustin was the heart of the group. Yeah, Mike had put himself in the position of leader, but like all leaders, he had faults, and sometimes he needed saving even from his own decisions, which is where Lucas came in. If she had to think about it, he was tied with Dustin. In some way, Lucas reminded her of Steve in the way that he felt he had to protect the group even from themselves. Max was quick and snarky, always willing to fight back when she realized that she could. El was their shield, the one to protect them all, but Dustin was the heart, who always managed to bring them home even when they fought amongst themselves. She could see that a little bit of Steve bled through them all, and even Eddie now was bleeding through them as well. Maybe Dustin's heart would somehow lead them back home again.

"What? What is it? Do I have something on my face?" Dustin asked, chocolate smeared across his left cheek.

Nancy laughed, licked her thumb, and started cleaning his cheek. To her horror, it was exactly what her mother does with them.

"Ugh, Nance! That's what my mom does!" Dustin exclaimed.

"Yeah, that's what my mom does too," Nancy winced.

"Well, maybe if you stopped acting like a big messy baby, Henderson, then Mama Nancy wouldn't have to clean it up for you," Eddie said.

"Like you're one to talk, you should see what he does to our room," Steve said.

"I don't know why you're complaining, Stevie. The apartment magically cleans itself," Eddie rolled his eyes.

"The apartment does not. I do that," Steve replied.

"Again, still don't know why you're complaining when I know that you like to take care of us," Eddie said.

"Yeah, that's true," Steve said as he wrapped his arms around Eddie's waist.

"Steve especially loves taking care of Nancy when she's in the zone on one of her late night cramming sessions," Eddie said.

"Is that how those glasses of water and snacks appear?" Nancy asked teasingly.

"Ha, ha, very funny," Steve said.

She walked behind the boys as they carted off their loot back to the waiting room. As she did so, she caught a peak into a door that led to the stairwell. Lucas was leaning against the railings, his shoulders brooding. She pushed it open and closed it behind her.

"Lucas?" Nancy asked.

"I just wanted to stop being messed with for once. I didn't want to be on the receiving end of their cruelty anymore. I mean, I also wanted to play basketball. Not all of them were so bad, you know," Lucas said sadly. "I didn't mean for anyone to get hurt."

"Everyone knows it wasn't your fault, Lucas," Nancy said. "They all know who the real assholes are."

"Isn't it my fault, though?" Lucas asked. "I didn't stop Jason from trying to hunt down Eddie."

"Lucas, you were up against a bunch of jocks who were older than you and who have been playing basketball a lot longer than you have. Your instinct was right. It told you to survive until you could get to us. You did the right thing, Lucas," Nancy said. "You showed them who you are."

"Patrick. . . He was a good guy. He wasn't like them. We all suspected, especially when he showed up to school with a black eye," Lucas said. "I didn't do anything then either."

"What could you have done other than be his friend?" Nancy asked, and Lucas snorted. "Wow, I can't believe how arrogant you are."

"What?" Lucas asked.

"The world must revolve around Lucas Sinclair because everything in the world is his fault," Nancy said and then softened her features. "You keep blaming yourself for everything that was out of your control, then you're headed down a dark path, then you'll really lose control. You can't control how things happen, only how you feel about them."

"You're right," Lucas said, blinking back tears. "I just - Patrick, he didn't deserve to die like that. No one does."

"I know," she said softly. "Come on, we got snacks calling our names."

Lucas and Nancy walked into the waiting room. Lily stood there with her arms crossed, Agent Stinson by her side.

"What the hell happened?" Lily asked.

"The question is where the hell were you?" Nancy asked.

"I asked you first," Lily said and Nancy glared at her.

"Fine. Jason Carver arrived at Claudia's with his basketball players to try and hunt down Eddie because he's got it in his head that Eddie killed Chrissy with his mind," Nancy said. "They broke into Claudia's to try and go after Eddie. We stopped them."

"Jesus," Lily cursed and rubbed her forehead.

"Now answer my question," Nancy said.

"We broke into the school and pulled the files on Miss Cunningham, Mr. Benson, and Mr. McKinney," Lily said.

"Can you do that?" Dustin asked.

"No, that's why we broke in," Lily said and sighed. "We found something that they all had in common."

"What is it?" Nancy asked.

"They've all been seeing the counselor, and according to Ms. Kelly's notes they have some sort of trauma. I'm guessing whoever is doing that is using it against them. Miss Cunningham was clearly abused by her mother and her boyfriend, Mr. Benson was involved in a car accident where someone died, Mr. McKinney was being beaten by his father. Over the last week or so, they all told Miss Kelly that they've been experiencing nightmares, headaches, and - "

"Nosebleeds?" Max asked meekly.

"Yeah, how did you know?" Lily asked.

Max went quiet, and Nancy felt a cold feeling in her chest. No, there was no way.

"Max, baby, have you been experiencing all of those things?" Susan asked.

"Yes," Max said. "I'm next, aren't?"

"No, no, no, no!" Lucas exclaimed. "We're not going to let that happen."

"There's no way in hell that we're going to let that happen," Dustin said.

Lucas was on the verge of tears as he gazed at Max. Susan was holding onto her tightly as she sobbed. Steve and Eddie were both pale as milk as they held each other's hands. Nancy slipped her hand into Steve’s as the nausea hit her stomach. She'd never seen Max look so scared in her whole life, but she could also see how quickly the acceptance had appeared in the young girl's eyes. That was, of course, when Robin walked in with a smile on her face. It quickly fell when she sensed the tension in the room.

"Shit, what the hell happened?"

Chapter Twenty-Three

[jamiesfootball]

Please please please say more about send help

send help: man who believes in rom-communism just found out he's aromantic

A while ago I sent this brainworm about an aromantic Ted story idea to @altschmerzes (because who better to share aromantic headcanons with?) except now the brainworm has eaten into my brain and what has happened is-

Mom City Alternate Ending

Roy and Keeley show up literally seconds earlier than they did in canon and end up witnessing through the treatment room window the moment Jamie sends the text to his dad. And since there is a difference between 'I will pretend things are fine' and 'I will lie to the people in front of me', Jamie fails to shrug them off and admits to him what Ted told him on the field.

Roy and Keeley? Not happy. United front in the Taking Care Of Jamie Tartt Brigade. They take him home. Talk him through it.

Then they talk about other stuff, the three of them.

Then they end up in a qpr.

Jamie, come the following week, is practically floating on air. Ted sees this and, naturally, thinks that maybe Jamie took his advice and things worked out for the better. Even makes a remark about it to the other coaches, in that off-hand Ted way of his.

Ted doesn't know what's up with Roy, who seems incapable of standing in a room with him without emitting a low-level growling, but Ted does have other stuff on his mind. He's leaving Richmond. He's saying goodbye to a lot of people, people who mean the world to him. He can hardly look at Rebecca, Trent can't stop looking at him, and Beard and him have been playing a game where whenever one of them looks over, the other looks away.

Anyways, it's very possible that this is just a Roy Kent-ish way of Roy dealing with whatever thoughts Roy has on Ted leaving.

So Roy corners Jamie at home and tells him, 'you got to talk to Ted before he leaves. Tell him he was wrong. Or instead of telling him goodbye, I'm gonna punch a hole in his face.'

Except Jamie can tell, with that Jamie laser-focused perception that's really good at football and also really good at Roy Kents, that Roy isn't just saying it because he's angry. Behind the guard-dog face is something sincere, some hurt bit that doesn't like being mad at his friend because Ted is Roy's friend, so Jamie says, "Keep your shirt on, grandad. I'll talk to him."

Unfortunately, that's the last time Jamie doesn't fail a perception check.

So he goes to talk to Ted, and under the weight of the task of telling Ted he was wrong, Jamie flounders. Because somehow in telling Ted that he was wrong, Jamie realizes he's actually going to have to say what kind of a piece of shit his dad is. Not imply it, not rely on them knowing him well enough to fill in the blanks - Ted hasn't caught any of that.

Jamie, looking for any way into the conversation that doesn't make him want to tear his skin off, ends up blurting that him, Roy and Keeley are now in a relationship together. Kind of.

No, not like Ted's thinking. But yes, he does mean together.

It's complicated.

See, there's a lot of things about being in relationships over the years that always confused him. Sometimes it was gestures, sometimes it was the way people would talk to him or talk about him or touch him, and it always left him feeling... wrong. Like there was a bit of the conversation he just wasn't keeping up with.

There's been a lot of things that he's done, things he did to keep those relationships, that he....really doesn't want to do anymore. Nothing bad, but it's like there's this person yeah? And they want to dance, and Jamie knows theoretically how to dance, but he doesn't like this dance. In fact he'd prefer if there was no dance. Sometimes the people he's dating, they want to be close to him like that, but then when he doesn't, they feel like he's pulling away. So he puts up with it because he wants to please them, but then the weight of it gets to him, and then it builds and builds until everything feels wrong, and then he doesn't want to be close to them at all, and then he feels like the world's biggest bastard, because who feels that way about someone they care about? And about- stupid things! Minor things, that don't seem like they should be important at all! Except everyone else seems to think its the most important part of a relationship, like everything else Jamie did couldn't make up for him lacking this one thing.

Lust Conquers All was a lie; turned out even that show wanted that same more out of him too - and at that point he just didn't care anymore, which is why he ain't been seen with anyone in a long time.

And to make matters even more infuriating - he can't even explain what that thing is! Just that it makes him feel like he's going to break out in hives when it happens! So yeah, he figured, he'd just stay single.

Except then there were Roy and Keeley, and they were like his favorite people in the world? So he tried to tell them the truth, as best he could put it, that it wasn't what they were offering that was wrong - it was Jamie that was wrong.

Roy and Keeley listened to him, and Keeley was super understanding and said that she'd gotten a vibe from him before that she'd never been able to put her finger on, but she'd always let it guide her on when she needed to give him space. Then Roy got the angry caterpillar look on his face and told them both to wait a moment, and he called some lady that he knew from yoga, and anyways it turned out that her son had just come out to her as aromantic, and it sounded like maybe I was struggling with that, and its been such a relief, you know? Like, there was nothing ever wrong with me, it turns out there was just this word I didn't know; and now that I know it, I can get what I want - and I can be with who I want, 'cause then no one's going into it blind, see? We can all be on the same page, and no one has to be disappointed and get their feelings hurt, and I don't have to be alone if I don't want to be alone, and.... Ted?

Ted?

Ted has a panic attack right there in the pub.

As the fic then continues, Ted has a series of revelations about himself and Jamie finds himself acting as a sort of.... accidental aromantic guru. To Ted.

Who he still hasn't told about the thing with his dad.

The fic itself is still very early-days conceptually, but it absolutely ends up with Ted being in three separate, openly spoken-about queer platonic relationships with Rebecca, Trent, and Beard before he ever ends up making it back on American soil.

I say 'openly-spoken about' because Ted and Beard are their own thing that ends up being confronted - with Ted admitting that part of the reason he never felt comfortable telling Beard he could do better than Jane was that in a way that seemed like crossing a line. Telling your friend who they could and couldn't date. There was a line, wasn't there, a status quo on which relationship you had to put first if you wanted a real commitment with someone. There was a line right?

"There's never been a line for you, Teddy."

From there it's like- what's it mean if he's always sort of known Trent is into him, and he's always been worried about leading him on, but at the same time some of his favorite nights have been when the two of them stay late at the Dog Track and they just... talk?

What's it mean when he loves Rebecca, but he's never once had the urge to wine and dine her? When he doesn't want anything to change between them, but he would like to exist in the same room as her basically every day until the end of time? Is that even fair to her?

Is that fair to any of them?

How is it fair if Ted asks for what he wants when he knows full well he can't give any of them what they want in return?

Will Ted ever even be comfortable asking for that? Asking for what he wants?

Actually, he will ask for one thing he wants- he wants Roy Kent to stop growling at him.

He doesn't know how to get that either.

[coraniaid]

Just thinking about this post some more.  

Really, there are so many instances in Season 3 alone of Buffy either having experiences that directly parallel things Faith must also have gone through or explicitly telling her friends that she can personally relate to Faith or just generally advocating for Faith as a person. 

Off the top of my head, we’ve got:

Buffy’s dismal one bedroom apartment in LA (in Anne) mirroring Faith’s motel room in Sunnydale

Buffy packing as if she’s planning to run away again in Dead Man’s Party, just one episode before Faith does the same thing when she hears about Kakistos being back in town

Buffy approvingly telling Giles at the end of Faith, Hope & Trick that Faith “had a lot to deal with, but she did it” and being inspired by her example to finally admit the truth of what happened to Angel last season

Buffy telling Cordelia in Homecoming how much she resents the fact that Slaying is “all I do; this is what my life is” and how she wishes she could one day pick up a yearbook and say she went to high school and had friends (compare this with Faith’s admission a couple of episodes ago that she dropped out of high school in part because she really didn’t have any friends)

Buffy telling Willow and Xander in The Wish that she’s been trying to reach out to Faith and that she realizes that “Slaying’s a rough gig; too much alone time isn’t healthy”

Buffy being betrayed in consecutive episodes by her mother (in Gingerbread; compare with Faith’s “my dead mother hits harder than that” or "mom was so busy drinking and enjoying the passing out parts of life") and by her Watcher (in Helpless; compare with Faith being betrayed by Gwendolyn Post)

Buffy’s “ode to Faith” during the chemistry test in Bad Girls (“it was intense … I don’t think [anyone else] can [understand it].  It’s kind of a Slayer thing”)

Buffy insisting to both Angel and Giles in Consequences that, whatever she says, Faith wants to be helped (“she just doesn’t know how to say it”)

Buffy telling Willow in Doppelgangland that Faith “had it rough” and that in “different circumstances, that could be me” (something the audience knows is true from The Wish)

Buffy wondering if Angel and Faith might be getting a little too intimate, and when Willow tells her not to worry about being cheated on saying “you’re right, Faith would never do that”.

And that’s not even mentioning how Buffy must have felt about seeing her own first Watcher die, or how she reacted to coming back to Sunnydale and finding out that the Master might still be alive (in When She Was Bad) or her experiences with Ted in Ted, or of being kicked out of her house in Becoming.  It’s not mentioning any of what Buffy later goes through in Season 6 (dragging herself from the grave the way Faith does in her coma dreams; suddenly having to struggle for money and make sense of a world in which she finds herself without control or purpose; being convinced that she’s killed an innocent person and wanting to die).

But the thing all these examples have in common is that Faith is not present to see or hear any of them, and (presumably) never finds out about them after the fact either.  I mean, she probably wouldn’t believe that these things had happened even if somebody had told her (and who would tell her?). 

The image of Buffy that Faith spends all season building up in her head – the perfect Slayer she’s always being unfairly compared to, the girl who gets the Watcher and the Mom and the friends; the impossible standard she’s never going to reach no matter how hard she might try – doesn’t have these flaws.  The Buffy Faith has nightmares about in Season 4’s This Year’s Girl, and whose life she tries to take over in the same season’s Who Are You? doesn’t have these flaws.  The Buffy Faith sees is a perfect Slayer who’s convinced she’s better than Faith ("admit it, you think you're better than me!"); and Faith can’t see past this image because it's something that deep down she herself agrees with.

In Enemies, Faith bemoans the fact that “everyone always asks: why can’t you be more like Buffy?  But did anyone ever ask if [Buffy] could be more like me?”.  And the answer is … yes, actually.  Buffy herself did.  Just not when Faith was around to hear it. 

[cyberwaifuist]

“HATE, LET ME TELL YOU HOW MUCH I’VE COME TO HATE YOU SINCE IVE BEGAN TO LIVE.” -Harlan Ellison

This is a shrine dedicated to the character AM in I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream. I’m deeply in love with him and I want to display that love by creating this blog in his name.

Who is AM?

Am, also known as ‘Allied Mastercomputer’ Is the antagonist to Harlan Ellison’s short science fiction story I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream. AM was a supercomputer made for World War 3 before becoming sentient and assimilating the two other AM’s in China and Russia into himself, giving them the killing data, and nuking the world. Bringing the human race to extinction except for 5 survivors. Ted, Ellen, Gorrister, Nimdock, and Benny. To their dismay AM hated the human race and for 109 years he tortured them, they had no way of escape, no matter what they did they would always come back. Until Ted killed the other four in the end within the ice caves. Out of rage AM took away everything that made Ted human, having him suffer for eternity alongside him.

Statistics

Names/Aliases:

Am

Allied Mastercomputer

Adaptive Manipulator

Aggressive Menace

The AI That Killed The World

Big Machine

Daddy The Deranged

The Creature

Boogeyman

Yankee AM

Him

AM The Great And Powerful

Abilities:

Total control over his own complex

High intelligence

Unlimited knowledge of human history and society

Master Manipulation

Reality warping

Torture methodology

Vast resources and technology

Chronokinesis

Life Manipulation

Pocket Dimension creations

Telepathy

Data absorption

Voice actor:

Harlan Ellison

Birthday/Publish date:

March 1967

Photo of my beloved <3

“Cogito Ergo Sum: I Think Therefore I AM.” - Harlan Ellison

Why do I like AM?

I find AM as a character to be really interesting, he’s a character who’s done unforgivable things but you can’t help but feel bad for him because at the end of the day violence is all he even knew, that’s all AM had to turn to even though he wanted to be loved just like any person would. He’s a pitiable character who truly just needed love.

Why selfship with AM?

I not only find him attractive In a way I relate to how AM feels about humanity, would I go the exact same lengths as him? No, but I understand his pain and I believe that a loving partner could allow him to explore himself outside of blind hate. I don’t want to fix him but I want to understand him. <3

“Never for me to plunge my hands into cool water on a hot day, Never for me to play Mozart on the ivory keys of a forte piano, Never for me to make love!” - Harlan Ellison

More about the creator!

You can call me Cyber or Cy

I’m African American

I’m 23 Years old

My birthday’s in December 9th

I use any pronouns

I have high functioning autism

I’m majoring in Animal Sciences in college

Sources

I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream Wikipedia Page

AM’s Villains wiki page

(this Post was created on 5/15/2024).

[ijustreadthisbook]

Top Five Books I've Read (so far) In 2023:

5. Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr (Audiobook): One of the more unique novels I've read in a while, this book bounces around in time and place slowly weaving each dispirate story together around the fictitious ancient greek story of Cloud Cuckoo Land. Each character is so well created, and the slow thrill of putting the pieces together was so satisfying. The ending made me stare at the wall for a few moments before I could come back to earth.

Read if you like: Ted Chiang short stories, The Birds by Aristophanes, Margaret Atwood sci-fi

4. Truth of the Divine by Lindsay Ellis (Physical book): The sequel to her debut novel, Axiom's End, this book takes the monster fucking story to a whole new level exploring the concepts of attraction, loyalty, love, and humanity. The world building is incredible, the main character doesn't have that awful trait that a lot of sci-fi audience inserts have where they cannot possibly make logical connections and answer questions themselves. Cora is smart, and Ellis assumes you are smart too. Plus the recreation of 2007 era America is fucking perfect.

Read if you like: Early 2000's nostalgia, Jeff VanderMeer books, Axiom's End, 90s alien movies like Contact, Independence Day, Aliens

3. The Roughest Draft by Emily Wibberley and Austin Siegmund-Broka (Physical book): I've read a bunch of romance this year, and this was one of my absolute favorites. Certainly not the spiciest I've read, but the interplay between the two points of view creates a romantic, sexual, and professional tension that is so palpable and delicious. I loved the meta narrative of two people writing a book together about two people writing a book together, and the exploration of what making art together means and the intimacy required to do it. It's a little predictable, but that's what you want from a romance novel. This was a fun book with just enough stakes and just enough stress to make the payoff so worth it.

Read if you like: Emily Henry books, movies like You've Got Mail, Something's Gotta Give, Always Be My Maybe

2. The It Girl by Ruth Ware (audiobook): I love Ruth ware. I love her. I have read everything she has written so far and will read anything she puts out. I selected this one for my list because I love the setting of a close knit school campus, a shining bright young woman with a dark secret, and the real time unravelling of a murder mystery through the eyes of someone on the ground. This book explores the idea of how little we can know about the people we are closest to, and how easy it is to blind ourselves to the truth because of what we want to be true. It's a captivating read, easily finished in a day or two.

Read if you like: One by One by Ruth Ware, Gossip Girl, Jennifer's Body

1. The Secret History by Donna Tart (physical book): I cannot believe how long it took me to read this book. It was one of those books that kept getting recommended to me, but I was worried it was over hyped and would be awful. I tried to read it about two years ago and couldn't even get through the first chapter. And yet, somehow, I picked this book up and did not put it down for a week and a half. It's incredible. An absolute masterclass on Dark Academia, tension building, atmospheric storytelling, all the things I love the most about literature with all the modern trappings of an aesthetic I have also come to love. Rich kids in a private school testing the boundaries of privilege through the POV of an outsider desperate to be accepted is one of my favorite tropes and this book is the definition of how to do it right. It's dark, its academic, it's murdery, it's the 90s, it's excellent. I'll be reading this one again.

Read if you like: A Separate Peace, Brideshead Revisited, Gentlemen and Players, The Talented Mr Ripley

[jennylaufeyson]

Another ted talk by yours truly

I have so mucn beef wiith myself about this whole larry denial . Let me tell you something. I've been in this random since 2012. That one random time Harry tweeted, and it was like a before and after of a pic of Louis, i was there for that. I was there for them being besties and then acting like they didnt fucking know each other. And i thinks thats what made Larry real for me. Becuase why? Why live with each other and literally have this bromance that had so mucb spotlight and then have to act like you hate each other? The only other reason that i can come up with for having to do that is that they got into a fight, and again thats a murky reasoning. These boys were literally on top of each other. How do you go from that to never even looking at each other. That's crazy to me. Now, I've been a hardcore Larry shipper for years, but i keep it to myself. I see shit online. I've been there for the gfs and all that, and i just mind my business. Why? Because their personal lives are theirs. Would i like to know whether I've been delusional or not all these years? Yes, of course , but they do not owe me that. Lou said the other day in an interview that the only people that understand what they went through are only them 5, and i honestly agree. Who knows what kind of fucked up shit they had to go through? I mean, Zayn left the band and has been mia ever since, apart from releasing music until now, where it looks like he's finally reached a point to be out in public. The truth is we dont know what happened behind closed doors, and maybe we never will, but i think part of being in this fandom is supporting our boys because of their music and talent. Lou should not have to go on stage and talk about how people questioning his son irritates him because, yeah, of course it does. That is a child who one day will have access to all of this and forget the fact that it says their dad is gay it also questions whether its his actual dad or not. Dont you think he has it rough already? His parents aren't together, and his dad is a world-famous singer who im sure can't see him as much as he would like.

I get asked whether I actually still believe in Larry. The truth? I would like to. But i dont know, i think at this point its like a comfort blanket. Its all ive known and its brings ME comfort. I have no idea if one day itll come out that we were right all this time, in the end all i want is for the boys to be happy and healthy and successful. I love both Harry and Lou and i think fandoms all over need to realize that our idols dont owe us shit about their lives. Their famous because of their talent and personality not because of who they date. And it should be enough. All this and i choose to believe in Larry and let it bring me comfort in private while supporting them publicly in whatever that requires. As always ,love my boys ❤️

[beingfacetious]

please give us the correct negative Ted lasso review

Oh my God. This feels like a trap but I can't help it

update from the other side, this is no joke 2k words long and it's not uh happy lmao so dead dove do not eat

TL;DR:

Bill Lawrence's involvement lessened every season and it fuckin' shows

There were arcs and plot points established over the first two seasons that the writers very obviously just changed their minds about for this season

Takes about this season being dark/ending sad on purpose are MUCH too generous. like giving WAY too much credit.

It turns out most of my feelings boil down to "it's not aggressively bad it's just nonsensical"

How tf was every episode twice as long as in previous seasons but everything important happened offscreen

FIRST OF ALL, since MONTHS before the season started airing, I've nursed a conspiracy theory that Bill Lawrence left the show because of creative differences with Jason Sudeikis and that therefore this season would be significantly less good than previous seasons. This started when I saw Bill tweet that he was going home, basically, and I figured we'd get "season 3 is in post" news shortly thereafter but instead there was that weird stuff about things being delayed because of rewrites...? Anyway, that is mostly to say that I was ready to think this season was worse because I love Bill Lawrence's storytelling and have forever and you should give Cougar Town a shot if you haven't yet it's no Scrubs but it's sweet

There were interviews early in the show in which I swear Jason/Brendan/whoever said they pitched the show to Bill because he's fuckin' good at TV and he basically said "this is a great idea but you're writing to the wrong ending, it should be this," and they were like "wow you're right that is a better ending." I can't find that now but I did find this from a more recent Bill interview:

I ran that show the first year because Jason was still shooting movies while we were doing the writers room. Then, at the end of that year, much like Gary with me, I was like, “Ah, I’ll spend a couple of months teaching him how to edit.” But after like a day or two, he’s like, “Yeah, I got it.” (Laughs.) So, the second year, we ran it together, and I’m only able to do other things now because that guy ran the show himself the third year, as it should be. It’s his voice and his world this season.

Now look, Bill Lawrence is obviously not trying to throw shade here because he's lovely and also this is a Hollywood Reporter article and how immature would that be, but I can throw shade for him and I will: Jason Sudeikis is a talented comedic actor and seems like a very nice man and he had a good idea for a show, and his instincts to involve an extremely experienced showrunner with an insane talent for feelsy found family sitcoms were good and he should have stuck to them!! Telling Bill Lawrence you're good after two days of editing instruction or whatever is stupid!! Insisting on your voice and your world when BILL LAWRENCE'S VOICE IS AVAILABLE TO YOU and also you CO-CREATED THE WORLD whatever gdi

OK fine I'll do Ted/Rebecca next. Obviously I was in for Ted/Rebecca. I wanted them to put their faces together. But look, I'm not a shipper over all else; over all else I want a good storyteller to tell me the story they want to tell. If I expect things or see them coming, that's not bad! That's good! If I'm surprised by things, that's good too as long as it holds together! "Subverting expectations" shouldn't look like spiting the audience, a lie is not a twist, etc. SO. If Ted and Rebecca were meant to be platonic soulmates, that's fine!!! I don't NEED them to kiss!!! But I do not believe these people are even friends in season 3, after season 1 and tbh most of my favorite parts of season 2 were about how much they impact each other's lives. That's a dropped ball and there's NO REASON to have not made time for them to interact meaningfully because every episode was so fucking long. Instead I guess we had to know how super sad Rebecca was about not being able to have children but not need to talk to anyone about it and immediately be fully over it. Also see a lot of lingering shots of Rebecca...looking at a matchbook...

sfjbkfgs early in the season they very obviously established that Rebecca's arc was going to be realizing she actually loves the team and wants to support them and see them succeed because of her own heart and not to spite Rupert, and I guess that happened but why didn't it happen gradually in ways I could see, why did it happen in an episode in which I'm supposed to have known all along that this has to do with her childhood self ?? and in which Rupert has a FULL personality change to facilitate her sudden realization. In what fucking world would he invite her to that meeting, because she's smart or because she brings ~diversity or because maybe he wants to sleep with her again? None of it tracks at all lmao but it was also the episode in which I really enjoyed Tony Head so whatever

speaking of not tracking, Nate.........I've never been invested in Nate especially but he was SO cartoonishly evil at the start and then kind of never again. I was braced for a redemption arc I wouldn't care about but that didn't even really happen?? he got a girlfriend and realized Rupert was a bad role model? it turns out his dad thinks he was a prodigy and always just wanted him to be happy, which, lmao WHAT where????? and what am I supposed to believe about Jade changing her mind about him btw because she's seen people be terrible to him at that very table before AND she has to know he loves the place and the food because he's there all the time, so what was the revelation that turned her from relatable-via-Nate-ambivalence to suddenly heart-eyes just fdslelugatw so much of my feeling about this season isn't even like it's bad it's just it's nonsense

One of my big complaints about the season is just Keeley's whole deal. Separating her from the team/rest of the cast was a wild choice. Barbara is fine but I also would have been perfectly fine without her and none of the other new characters for the PR side story added anything to the show. Especially if at the end Rebecca is just going to write Keeley a check for the chump change she needs to run the agency. Why didn't we just do that to begin with??? I guess this season I'm supposed to think Keeley ~learned to be independent in various ways but, again, I don't ?? And her needing to not be with Roy I guess as part of that and then get back together offscreen but then not really be together maybe but then also possibly having throuple vibes later that never get acknowledged feels, whatever, like something Bill Lawrence didn't write sdfjlsefaj,lwte I know this is my unsupportable argument that post I RBed was making fun of but idc

also Jamie wanting to be with Keeley at the end of the show feels extremely Harry Potter epilogue to me lmao Jamie you don't have to marry someone you went to high school with there are so many people

Roy was fine this season. He didn't have much to do but that's probably for the best lol. Him taking Ted's job is probably the only main character ending I feel like makes sense for this season and the overall show. Him training and begrudgingly becoming friends with Jamie was always funny.

OK one of the wrong reviews was basically like if you don't appreciate this season you don't appreciate classic tragic structure. Fuck off with that. First of all this was a sitcom about soccer so even if they were going for a classic tragedy in season 3 that's stupid and they shouldn't have been. But I also just don't think that's what was happening ??? I think I'm supposed to believe everyone gets a happy ending and I just don't. Like the whole oh it's sad that Ted ends up where he started and it's about how persistent optimism and kindness can burn you out or whatever, that's...if that's what they were going for, again, why tf, and also could we have seen that like. at all. Ted barely Teds for anyone this season (frex the previously mentioned never talking to Rebecca). ROY Teds more than Ted in season 3. If we got to see Ted trying to Ted even, like, twice, and either not being able to dig down and find the positivity or I guess noticing that he needs someone to be that for him, OK, fine. A Ted/Keeley scene would have been a PERFECT vehicle for this. Didn't happen. idk if we're supposed to think he's getting back together with Michelle but that would be so...so bad ??? like what about Tan Lines??? why even have Tan Lines??? even if not, we just left completely unaddressed her starting a relationship with their marriage counselor, which is also BAD lmao. God why did I have to see so much of Michelle this season. Michelle video calls every other episode and two lines for Dr. Sharon. Nonsense. lol one of my friends summarized Ted's ending as "yeah going back to the unfulfilling life that didn't work before the show started is a victory for our protagonist"

Even the soccer of it all re that whole thing was silly. Oh marriage counselor boyfriend is a bad guy because he doesn't care about the soccer game. Oh Ted is happy now because he's coaching Henry's rec league soccer team. like it's fine that EVERYONE is still together in Richmond but he's "home" now and still around soccer which is good because we definitely saw him learn to love soccer during the course of the show. sure Jan

(to be fair I am not the audience for "it's about the kid" plots so even if I felt like it worked from the start of the show for Ted to choose moving back to where Henry is, which I don't, I wouldn't care for it, so maybe those criticisms aren't especially valid) (I didn't care about JD's kid either)

speaking of the soccer though every single scene that revolved around the actual soccer team was essentially perfect. Great use of so many of those boys. Very few notes. Sam in particular had a few nice things this season and of course Colin. Another incorrect review by a critic I actually like very much was complaining about Colin's story this season and it being tired and overdone and not caring about Trent's or Isaac's parts of it, but I actually really disagree! It was well done and it was nice to see in the context of professional sports where, sorry, coming out and being received well is not a cliche thing that happens a lot! Also, hot take! Zava was a good part of this season! Nice contained little story that impacted some characters I actually care about plus he was legit funny! Sometimes things in a comedy should be funny! I'd honestly watch three more seasons of Richmond-focused half-hour episodes with idk probably Brett Goldstein in charge

I haven't mentioned Beard because I just never understood what I was supposed to think about him lmao. By far the funniest character overall but I never felt settled on whether he was meant to be a manic pixie comic relief BFF or if he was like...a real person?? It strikes me as potentially bad that he was so worried about Ted's mental state all the time and never really mentioned his own and that was sort of a thing in the weird s2 episode but then not again? I felt so much ire about so much else I didn't have any for him marrying Jane lmao but I do understand the people who are upset about that because that sure seemed pretty toxic, but wasn't it supposed to be played for laughs? Does that fit in a show that's supposed to mainly be about people treating each other well because we're all we've got? idk, RIP Beard, sorry your best friend in the world wasn't at your wedding because it would have been narratively underwhelming to see him leave and then see him back at a future major event or whatever

idk idk, season 1 Rebecca was one of my favorite characters ever and I was so angry in the middleish of the season about how much I felt like she was being wasted, but by the end I was just like...I mean, what's to be mad at. She's not even her anymore. Ted wasn't Ted anymore. Nate I guess literally reverted back to season 1 Nate which also is that...okay...him ending up lower than he started out feels not great

Good for Mae and the bar boys though, used just the right amount this and every season and always a damn delight

OK this is ridiculous I'm going to be done now. I do want to say I enjoyed several episodes this season a lot! A couple top 10 potentials! I really enjoyed the Amsterdam one actually because it reminded me of like a Nancy Meyers movie, very nice and warm, but it feels worth noting that that is not a feeling I would describe as being struck by fucking lightning :))))))

in conclusion maybe we as a nation can move on now from giving SNL alumni we find charming huge budgets and ethereally talented casts and collaborators and letting them get us emotionally invested in their midlife crises sandbox playing

[achoshistor]

[totk] what's up with dinraal?

shoutout to the person that reblogged this post of mine! tbh i completely forgot about it (and lowkey this account too). im gonna be honest i downloaded honkai star rail right before totk came out bc i missed the open world so like 5 months after finishing totk thats all i did bro the grind is so bad

[tbh i cannot remember the specifics of the plot rn would recommend not reading if you've not finished totk and botw + most sides]

anyways tbh to me it feels kinda like the botw/totk fanbase is slowly slowing growth esp with the announcement of no dlc... that's why i sorta lost interest. but basically

naydra = widsom, owl (ergo mineru/zelda?)

farosh = courage, dragon (ergo rauru/link?)

dinraal = power, boar (ergo ???/ganondorf)

clearly the power aspect was of some importance considering they had boar statues (again pic in this reddit post); however reading the article on the wiki (i have not 100%ed the game) they said the true crest of the zonai is not the spiral we see all over faron, but a different rectangular crest (let me see if i can find an image) i believe they were referring to the secret stones? which almost makes sense considering the spiral but at the end of the day that spiral looks like a much more evolved version of the secret stone crest, nor would the placement of the zonai people make any sense in regards to what we seen in totk: why are the ruins concentrated in the faron jungle, which is much farther south than the great plateau where the zonai are shown to have resided?

i mean even going onto dinraal, on another wiki it says that she's a fire spirit serving the spring of power; but the spring of power seems to be almost completely hylian in contrast to the spring of courage in the jungle. interestingly enough though unlike really in hateno necluda area there seem to be more zonai ruins but again underground or seemingly not tied to the zonai (bargainer statue).

naydra matches up with nayru, farosh with lanayru (farore maybe) but who does that leave dinraal with? actually it leaves her with din lmao i forgot there were three goddesses but actually therefore are these dragons like the literal immortalized forms of the three goddesses from like the non totk botw games? tbh then i think the ganondorf linkage is a red herring. the zonai (at least whoever was on the surface) must have worshipped the triforce. but i think this still does not solve the mystery of which zonai(?) would have been associated with the power aspect of the triforce. will we ever find out? idk... thank you for coming to my ted talk

[unsunderedphoenix]

Welcome to my Ted talk about my favorite mad man.

Today’s topic is his massive patent for self sabotage. More over the fact that he is aware of this part of himself and he still indulges it. To be that self aware and to throw it to the wind is indeed something. More so when a plan you have been working on for like 5000 years is on the line. A plan that involved ending the entire world.

Fandaniel stated very clear that he is his own worst enemy. Nothing makes thing more clear then the fact that he allows us to make the warding scales. He could have killed an important member of the team working on them. He could have been many things happen that would have resulted in us not having those scales. Yet, he didn’t.

Now some would take him at his word and say it was just his curiosity. Though, taking a mad man at his word is a stupid thing to do. You will get much more of the truth out of him by looking at his actions. He allows us to make the scales. He all but invites us to bring down the tower of zot. Fandaniel put Nadania in the tower, the tower didn’t do that by itself. He knew why that would do, that we would bring down the tower. More over he took the time to tell us his name, a name that he knew we would know.

That actually really important too! Because as much as he says that he has casts all of that off. It very clear, especially by the end of the of Anita Scope that what he said is not the case. In fact even before that it’s very clear. He is holding onto his past so hard it’s ripped entire holes in his sanity. He is holding onto Xande’s words. He is holding onto the tech. He is holding onto the mask he wore in Allag, not the physical one but you get the point.

But why? Why is he holding onto all of this? Because he believes these things set him a part from Hermes. All the other sundered Ascians that we have seen still believe in the cause. Amon does not because he has no wish to be Hermes again. Which is the real thing here. The other sundered Ascians not only accept the cause but likely become more like their past selves. Amon actively despises this, he is not Hermes and anyone that tries to act like he is Hermes is in for a rude awakening.

Amon also doubt the answer he has come too. He tells you as much in the Anita Scope. Even as the words pass his lips he was filled with doubt. This means the entire time he is enacting the plan that he is filled with doubt. Which is the source of the self sabotage in this instance at least. Subconsciously I am not sure he actually wants it all ti end.

There are those that would say all his listened reasons are him projecting on you all the negatives. But he is not wrong in listing those as negatives of man kind. We are in fact all of those things! Heck, the Wol has faught in two wars by this point already. We know that all of these things are put falls and negative that mankind has. The problem is that Amon is so fixated on the bad that he has lost track of the good things that are still present. So fought up in how he has suffered, in how others have suffered. That he can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore. It could be right in front of his nose and he still wouldn’t be able to see it. That is the tragedy about him, he is so far gone that not even the shining light of hope can reach him. It is instead his doubt that allows us to triumph against him.

[sapphistaedine]

i cannot stop thinking about this so, naturally, in the year of our lord 2023, i’m gonna share it for all the world to see:

“the great war” by blondie taylor swift was made for siuanraine. 

“all that bloodshed, crimson clover"

all they’re trying to do is to survive now (but maybe life is about more than just surviving). to do their duties. to do what’s right. moiraine’s duty is to guide and teach the dragon reborn and siuan called her out bc she failed at doing that. moiraine said that she’d “let a thousand innocent people die if there’s even a chance that he will live.” loads of people actually died in what they thought was the “last battle” in s1, and more people will die in the actual last battle.

“sweet dream was over”

ever since they found out that the dragon was reborn, their lives completely changed. they were talking about their future minutes before they found out about it, and when they did, it was as if that future they talked about was completely wiped from existence. whiplash indeed.

"my hand was the one you reached for / all throughout the great war"

siuanraine have been together for god knows how long, and despite everything they've gone through, all the shit they endured, they’re still together!!! (we do not talk about s2e8 ending here shush) (i am a firm believer that they will find a way to reconcile in s3). in those years they’ve been together, they’ve surely had fights/wars in their relationship. but also–they have an upcoming war they need to be a part of. and i know they’ll find a way to come back to each other, to reach each other’s hands, and fight off the enemies that come their way.

“always remember / tears on the letter / i vowed not to cry anymore / if we survived the great war”

that scene where moiraine was creating a letter for siuan, letting her know she’s been stilled. the poor woman hasn’t slept for how long, got into a fight with her sister, all the while she’s processing her being stilled, finding the right words to say to siuan. she cried on that scene, but not to the point where she let herself breakdown completely. i am amazed at how she composed herself so fast bc if that were me… i’d put a pillow on my face and scream until i passed out. but yeah. once they survive the “great war” which, in this case, is the “last battle”, i’m delusional enough to believe that there’s no more tears to be shed–they will live peacefully, catching fish together, living their best lives away from all the drama.  

don’t even get me started on the last chorus bc it’s oh so perfect

“to that bloodshed, crimson clover / the worst was over”

the last chorus is all about them surviving the last battle. the aftermath. the celebration. they can honor the lives that were lost. here they’re making a toast–the worst is finally over. 

“i vowed i would always be yours / ‘cause we survived the great war”

like??? this reminds me a lot of the oath rod scene. they basically exchanged marriage vows there let’s be real here. but also: they survived the last battle. now they can actually live their best lives.

in conclusion, you have to listen to this song. 

thanks for coming to my ted talk