#I ALSO KNOW KOALAS ARE NOT ENTIRELY USELESS
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damniteggs · 10 months ago
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my 30+ year old coworkers had no idea what the fuck a copypasta was and I think I might’ve traumatized them
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natsukitakama · 4 years ago
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Being in relationship with Gojo Satoru would include
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Author note : got nothing to say about it. I’m his personal hoe even though I’m aware about what Gege-sama said. Let’s say I can’t be saved. It’s too late for that LMAO. Anyway let me know if you enjoy this ♡ (also I changed my head canon’s page setting how does it looks ?) 
Warning : slight nsfw / me simping over a man that would definetly not give me time / also I didn’t catch up with the manga (Japan’s scan cause we’re kinda late in France) 
Update : I didn’t say it obviously I do not own that gif credit to the owner(s) 🙏🏻
Masterlist
Request are Open
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a lot of work. 
As Gege said themselves they didn’t see Gojo being faithful or interest on a relationship (still hurt btw) 
But why ?
If we look carefully we can see that his relationship with every superior are pretty densed : he is absolutely against his own cast and I won’t be surprised that he is pretty distant with his family and the member of his clan. Which mean basically they’re not so much people who are closed to him 
He didn’t allow them to be close 
Again since he tends to be pretty narcissistic and is not afraid to threat everyone that might be against him cursed or not. 
So let’s say he got couple of ennemies. 
Then I remembered his first interaction (or at least of the first he got) with Yuta. We all remember what happened to that girl he was so deeply in love, remember what Gojo said ? He actually said that in his opinion love might be the worst cursed or something like that. Meaning he is aware about how dangerous love can be. 
So here’s the thing it’s not like he is not faithful (even though he is into one night stand) but he can’t allow himself to fall himself nor will he let someone falls for him. Because they will became an easy target, they will become his worst weakness. 
Especially since he is super busy it would mean that he couldn’t be with you whenever he wants to.  
So that would explain why he is not really into relationship cause he knows it would be dangerous for him. 
Also I don’t believe he was raised with love, I’m pretty sure he wasn’t closed or never seen any act of love so he is pretty cold about it cause he is used to. 
In addition his personnality is ... well he is piece of works. So it’s not that easy to fall in love with him (I mean deeply in love not just being attracted to his physics) and it’s difficult to make him falls in love too. (It would be for another headcanon) 
But now let’s pretend you went through his childish nature and he let you get to know him and boom you’re started a relationship with him 
He is clingy asf you know that 99% of the time he is walking not giving a single shit about people think about him. That man is so confident he knows no one would dare criticize him for being a clingy or boyfriends and if they do it He would claim that they are just jealous of him. 
Even if he is super chill about everything he would never broke any of your boundary. So if you’re comfortable with him hugging you in public or giving you a deep kiss that’s fine he will keep it for later. 
But that won’t stop that little shit for teasing you. Oh no. It’s even worst if you are shy, oh god he would do anything just to see your cheeks getting red. He just loves it. It’s addictive. 
Cause let’s be real, if he actually started a relationship with you was because he was way too addicted. Your relationship probably started with some one night stand that wasn’t just one but sssh. Then you started to hang out together not dating calling that a date because you guys didn’t want to put a name on it. Then both of you started to be territorial and get upset when one of you flirted with another. It last until You and Gojo couldn’t just sleep or think without being close together. 
He is like a sweet drug you know ? Once you got a bite you can’t just stop. Same way for him as soon as you got him, you won’t be able a le to keep away. 
That also explain why he is clingy he just has to touch you, simple touch deep touch intimate touch he doesn’t care all he needs was you close to him. 
When you guys became serious (put a name on it cause you were already a couple but whatever) the man became even more noisy if that’s even possible. 
He praises you a lot not matter what job you have what passion you’re followed anything. You’re just the best S/O of the entire world. 
Also he show off a lot cause everyone thought Nanami would the first to be in a relationship with a S/O  but he failed 
And oh boy does Gojo loves that. 
He can’t help but remind EVERYONE (including his students of those coming from kyoto) that he is dating you
« Aaah can’t wait to be home I bet Y/N would make those delicious cookies of them. It’s so good to go home to find your beloved. Oh yeah you can’t know that you don’t have a S/O so sad »
You little shit 
As I previously said he tends to not be around that much because of his jobs, but that’s okay he would make it up one way or another. 
I know some people believes that he will take his S/O to the greatest restaurant, or into those luxurious places. It’s true sometimes he just find you to have a good quality time but he also wants to spoil you so it’s good way to do it. 
But most of the time I think he might be into those private date when you’re into a little cafe or having a picnic. Again I don’t think he had the chance to enjoy those private moment with his family when you’re just enjoying the people you loved in the simple way. And he just loves seeing you cook for him it stroke his ego and melt his heart. 
I heard somewhere that he might be touch starved and I agree with that postulate. I do believe he wasn’t raised with love and tenderness so that would explain why he could be so touchy-feely with people and so that’s explain why he is clingy. 
He is definetly into carrying and simple person, he is just a giant baby he loves being taken care of he wants to have your attention 24/7, that’s just who he is. When i said simple,it’s more like not superficial cause he won’t tolerate that he hates when people has the audacity to lie in front of his face or believes they can manipulate him. 
A lot of people tends to think he is stupid or easily to use because of his childish behavior and he hates that. He has a huge ego. 
So he won’t like it if you’re trying to get something from him. If you want to say something just say it. 
Even if he is huge tease he would never judge you or make fun of you (not in a mean way) so he expects you to be blunt about your feelings. If you think he is an idiot for always keeping everything for himself tell him. 
If his S/O is a civilian he might not talk about the jujutsu world at first but then when he realized he was bound to them. Like he couldn’t breath without you he would tell you the truth. 
He kiss a lot. I’m not making the rules he just kiss very easily and each of them have a meaning. Cheeks kiss is to ask you something like buying an ice cream when it’s 4AM (use it with his best puppies eyes cause the fucker knows his effects on you). Nose kiss are like morning kiss, he tends to do it a lot after sex too it’s just another way for him to say I love you but in a cute way. Head kiss is to reassure you that everything would be fine, it’s also his way to comfort you when you’re sad it’s always followed by an « everything would be fine » or « I’m here now it’s okay ». Kiss on your lips could be a way to tempt you for sex who goes along with a bite of your lips of a stroke of your hair, but his kiss on your lips could also be his way to remind you how much he loves and how much he miss you. 
But no worry he is not afraid to tell you he loves you, but he just kept those works for special moment. 
He hugs a lot. From behind when you’re cooking for him, cuddle you while watching a movie or put you against his chest so you would climb around his body like a koala 
Nest your face against his neck and he would melt right now. The feeling of your breath against his skin damn he got shivers all the time 
Time to time don’t forget to stroke his ego like cuddling him and tell him how good you feel like you feel safe. He needs time to time (also even if he might tease you a little bit, do that and you’ll get extra kiss and cuddle time)
Also he can’t say no to you. Puppy eyes are useless just took his hand and ask him slowly to do something and he would do it. 
The problem is you can’t say no to him too. Cause 1) he is super convincing when he wants to 2) because he knows you can’t say no to his pretty face especially his eyes 3) and if you’re fighting his attraction over you he would use puppy eyes on you. So either way he got what he wants. 
You guys definetly got some « sweet » dates at 4 AM : like he just woke up because he dreamt about those delicious mocchi he tastes when he first met Itadori and now all he could think about was those mocchi. So he got you at 4AM to buy and share some mocchi together. Even though you hated being woke up like this you couldn’t help but enjoy the fact that he woke you up so you could share a meal together 
It comes from nowhere but you guys have sex a lot. He is horny it’s written on his face I can’t change that. He is intoxicated he can’t help it but need to feel you clinching around his dick, bitting your lips and scratching his back as he thrust into your core. 
He daydreams a lot and 99% it’s not pure at all
He sext you a lot even during a meeting, he just took his phone and text you about how boring the meeting is and how he wish he could just ravage you in front of them so they would shut up for once. 
He is pretty open about everything when it came to sex it’s not like you can break him or anything but he loves it every time you came to him asking for something you might want to try but be afraid he won’t be agree or might hurt him.
It’s so cute that you thought you could hurt him physically 
Somehow he managed you to have sex in his office which you were kinda up to it but he also convinced you to do it on a car as soon as ljichi left for a call. He can’t help it you were just so cute so tempting looking like this by his side and well he is into semi-public sex he just don’t give up a fuck LMAO who’s gonna say yell at him anyway ? He is THE Gojo Satoru. 
Not sure if I said it before but he won’t mind dating a simple human, he is just so bitter about everything his world is a mess so it’s fine that he can’t be normal, just man hanging around the personne he loves without thinking about his position about his clan, the cursed. Just couple of hours during his day where is just your boyfriend, he cherish that. 
It doesn’t mean he won’t date an exorcist, but it might be even more difficult since he can’t help but wondering if you’re actually into him (which is hard considering his antics) or if you’re into his position. But if you managed to show him that you actually didn’t care about the whole clan, position and everything yeah he would be into you. It would be more simple cause he can be with you 24/7 or at least as much as possible, and protect you even though you don’t actually need someone to take care of you. He just has to do it. 
He spoils a lot, remember how easily he would book a restaurant for his students ? Same things it’s even worse cause sometimes during a mission he walked around a new street and it’s like « damn that’s look yummy » and after being sure nothing could harm you (especially if you’re allergic of If you a vegan or veggies) he would book a reservation and then took you on a date. 
He does that a lot, since he can’t manage to have quality time as much as he wanted he just does things like that so you can share a meal together and also because he can tease you during the whole night then teleport both of you into his house for « sport » activity. 
Also he tends to buy some many things, like he could walked in Tokyo and see a grandma selling some candle he would buy it just because it seemed aesthetic for him, and now everytime he saw something that reminds him of you he buys it. So you guys got plenty of things that you can’t throw away since Gojo linked them with a memory of you. 
Speaking of things who belongs to you, he wears your clothes and you wears his, remember how easily he wore Nobara’s skirt he is pretty skinny he can wear anything and won’t bother asking you first. Just get used to it cause he doesn’t plan on giving up. 
I do believe that a relationship with you force him to be more « mature » or at least not always acting like a child. But let’s be real he would still act like a baby you sign for this. 
In the end it’s an healthy relationship even though he tends to be flirty sometimes, he would be careful if he noticed that you’re not comfortable, or he would make sure to reminds you that he is actually in love with you, he won’t go anywhere. No matter if you’re an exorcist or not, you would still be afraid that one day he won’t comeback, so he makes sure to spoil you, love you to erase that fear. He is the strongest and doesn’t plan on leaving you soon. 
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calif0rnia-lovers · 4 years ago
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tap out.
Request: soft kiss + wrestling with Ez and actually pinning him and he’s like wtf?????
A/N: I threw in some babies because Ez as a dad 😍😍😍😍😍 Also, trying to write more for Ez. Here’s some flirty domestic life for you. Hope you like it.
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Summary: The way Ez tells it, you never pinned him. 
Words: 1.7k
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The living room of the Reyes household is full of screams and giggles. And growls?
"Grab him, Sol!" 
Despite the request of her older brother, Marisol is scooped up by a passing Ez. Her giggles bounce off the walls as her father's lips cover her cheeks and neck with kisses. Seizing the window of opportunity, Iván tugs against his father's shirt and hoists himself onto Ez's back. 
When you round the corner, you find Ez overpowered. On hands and knees, he has a two-year-old Marisol clinging to his front. Her arms are wrapped around his neck as she hangs from to his chest koala style.
Your three-year-old son is on his back giggling as he narrowly avoids the playful swipe sent his way. Ez lowers Marisol to the ground. Reaching back, he grabs Iván, who groans in defeat as he is lowered to the ground. But the second one is down the other is climbing again. It is a cycle that has been on repeat for the last thirty minutes.
The three are full of giggles.
"Ezekiel-" you groan.
Ez freezes. He knows he’s caught. He was supposed to be putting the two to bed, not keeping them up. Your husband glances up at you with a sheepish grin on his face. Both children climb onto his back in his moment of relapse. Despite the stern look on your face, Ez refuses to break character. 
"Ahhhh--nooo," he groans, his body slowly sinking to the ground under the unbearable weight. “Y/N.....Help me....” Ez’s movements slow, his voice comes out strangled as he crawls towards you. "They’re....tooo....strong....”
As he reaches your feet, Ez collapses to the ground. His body stills, his tragic downfall earning him a compilation of excited giggles and claps.
After a moment passes, he peeks up at you.
"Aren’t you going to avenge me?" He whispers.
“No, that’s what you get.” Lowering the hamper from your hip to the ground. You step over your husband, bending down to take your daughter into your arms.
“I can’t believe I married a woman so cold-hearted,” Ez huffs, his hand finding his heart as you pick up Iván.
"You should’ve thought of that before you kept them up well past their bedtime." You smile as he sends a wink your way. 
After putting them both to bed, you find Ez still on the floor. Only he’s folded nearly all the contents of the entire hamper. The smile on his face causes your eyes to roll as you sit down across from him.
"Don’t try that smile on me," you giggle. Taking the T-shirt from his hands, you focus on folding it. As you glance up, you find him watching you with a soft smile on his lips. "I can’t believe you let two little kids beat you."
“Two against one,” Ez laughs. "Since when is that a fair fight?"
"Against you?" You lightly roll your eyes. "Please don’t tell me those muscles are for just show. Then I married you for all the wrong reasons."
Ez's brow arches. His smile brings the usual butterflies. His head tips to the side. "That’s what you married me for?" 
"What else?" You giggle. Your playful eyes meet his. Your nose scrunches in disgust. "For your brain? Ugh. Who finds that sexy?”
Ez shifts the hamper out the way. "So...I'm just a piece of meat?"
You nod "pretty much" as he leans forward, softly shaking his head. 
"I mean, with arms like those I thought you’d at least be able to protect me from two little pint-sized kids."
Ez's hand finds your ankle as you drop the folded t-shirt into a nearby pile.
"Zeke." You warn. "Don’t."
"Don’t what?" He asks, his thumb tracing circles against your skin.
"Start a fight you obviously can't finish,” you tease. "I mean, you couldn’t even take Marisol and Iván. I, on the other hand, will have no trouble bruising your ego when I win."
You catch sight of his mischievous smile before he tugs. You squeal as he pulls you forward. Your giggles meld with his chuckles as he climbs over you. You squirm as you attempt to stop him, and you almost do. You're quicker than he remembers, but Ez makes up for it in strength. He settles his entire weight against your body, pressing you into the floor until he's able to catch your wrists. 
"Where’s all that talk? Hmmm," he chuckles, his hands pinning yours alongside your head as he shifts his position. "I thought you were actually going to do something."
"You cheated," you giggle, trying your best to roll on your side. The escape attempt is useless, Ez's weight has you pinned. His hips keep you right where he wants you. "It doesn't count."  
"Making excuses, querida?" Ez ducks down to press a kiss against your neck. A chuckle slips from his lips as you squirm beneath him. "Can't make up rules as you go, that's not how this works."
"I can't believe you play dirty." You giggle as Ez shoots you a look of pure innocence. "You literally laid on top of me!"
Ez's grip tightens around your wrists as you attempt to free your hands. The smile on his lips morphs into a grin as your legs wrap around his waist. 
You shift your hips, the action barely swaying his stature. You try a second time and get the same result. Ez raises his eyebrow, a smirk on finding his lips.
"Are you trying to get me off?" He snickers.
"Yes." You huff as you give up. 
"I guess that's one way." 
Guiding your hands to rest above your head, Ez pins them both beneath the grip of his left hand.
"Here, I'll make it easy on you." He grins. His right hand drifts beneath your t-shirt to rest against your ribcage. "Got you with one hand."
He catches sight of your rolling eyes before he nuzzles into your neck. A kiss comes soft against your skin, a chuckle following, as he lifts his pinky.
"Still can't get out?" He taunts, lifting his ring finger. Another kiss brushes against your skin, his lips sucking against your sweet spot. "How 'bout now?"
Releasing your hand, Ez allows his hands to run over your hips before drifting beneath your shirt. His fingers tease your ribcage, your hips shifting beneath him in response. A mixture of giggles and squeals fill the room as Ez tickles. His attack is ruthless. He dismisses your pleas for him to stop with a series of kisses that press against your neck and cheek. 
"Please, stop-" You giggle breathlessly. "Zeke-Okay!"
His attack instantly halts. You struggle to catch your breath as he smirks.
"Ready to admit I won?" Sparkling brown eyes meet yours as his hands squeeze your hips in a warning. "Choose your words carefully, sweetheart." 
The boyish grin is a sight that halts your response. Suddenly denying Ez's claim is an afterthought. You smile in return, Ez's gaze dropping to your lips. His touch digs into your hips as you bite your lip.
"No." The soft shake of your head causes Ez to blink. 
He doesn't have enough time to recover. You leverage your hips, pushing up against his. The shift of your hips allows you to tip him off balance.  
"Shit-" 
You're on top of him before he can even fully process how fast you've moved. Your hand presses firmly against his chest as your weight settles against his torso.
“Gotcha,” you giggle as his head falls back. 
You make a point of pinning down his wrists for good measure. Ez tilts his head to gauge your grip.
"Where’s all that talk, Ezekiel?" You echo softly. Lowering your lips to his, you lightly brush a kiss against his smile. "Hmmm?"
"That was lucky," he notes. "I got distracted."
"Oh? And that's my fault?" You tease. "Sounds to me like someone is making excuses...I got you fair and square."
"Did you?" He challenges. His hips shift beneath you, your gasp filling the air as you tip forward. Your palms press against the floor to maintain your balance.
Ez's smile doubles in size as you meet his gaze. The heat of his palms drags along the back of your thighs.
"Come on, Zeke. Didn’t expect you to stoop to such low levels," you giggle as his hand finds your ass kneading the soft skin. "Trying to distract me?"
"I'll take what I can get." He chuckles, his hands firmly guiding your hips down to rest against his. "Sometimes you gotta fight dirty."
"Level the playing field?"
He nods, a groan slipping out as your hips gently grind against his. The soft rocking of your hips catches Ez's breath. 
“How’s that working out for you?” You smile as his fingers knead your skin encouraging your movements. 
"Fucking great," he grunts. He tightens his hold on you as if you could pull yourself from his lap.
His nose brushes against yours as his eyes drift shut. His chin tilts so that he can kiss you.
"Sorry, Mr. Reyes," you smile as you move your lips out of his reach. Your palm pressed against his chest, pushing him back to the ground. His eyes open to find your playful ones watching him. "I think you owe me something first."
Ez’s grin is back as your eyes linger on his lips before lifting to meet his gaze. He knows you're not going to make the same mistake as him. 
"Shit...” he groans, as your hand remains firm against his chest. The soft rolling of your hips against his bulge a stark contrast. "I tap out."
The tap out comes softly against your thigh, Ez’s left hand instantly finding the back of your neck as you smile.
His lips are soft against the corner of your mouth as your hands run down his chest. Your nose brushes his before your lips meet his. Your hand cradles his cheek, your thumb caressing his skin. The soft circles he massages into the base of your spine pulls a soft moan from your lips. The kiss is soft and slow. Neither of you rushes towards the end, your bodies relaxing into the comfort of one another. The kisses make up for the chaste and stolen kisses from the busy day. 
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cryptid-kratt-kid · 3 years ago
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A Crap Guide To Animals, With Salutations.
Today's Episode: Koalas
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Sup Liches, Witches, and nonbinary Bitches! It's me, ya boy, Salutations.
Due to the demands of the dumbass running this blog, I am being forced to shamelessly rip off JoCat's "Crap Guide" series and also tell you useless facts about animals.
And before any of you ask "Is Toodles gonna be in this series?" know that the answer is, not if I can help it. (But the dumbass running things is probably going to shove him in here with me anyways.)
Today I have decided that I will be slandering koalas, as I have not been given a script and the little shits had it coming.
Nature didn't even fucking try with these little bastards.
Their entire diet consists of semi-poisionous leaves with hardly any nutritional value. That's why they spend a majority of the damn day sleeping.
Well, I guess I'm not entirely correct in saying that eucalyptus is all they eat, because they've been caught on record EATING FUCKING DIRT. Maybe they know that the goddamned dirt is healthier than the leaves they EVOLVED to eat?
And they don't even recognize it if it's off the branch! You could strip all the eucalyptus trees bare and place the leaves on a plate in front of a koala, and it'd stare at you and starve because it won't know what the fuck you've just bestowed upon it.
They don't even understand the concept of rain. Fucking rain. They don't seek shelter or anything, they just sit there getting wet.
Oh and did I mention that they suck at climbing as well? You'd think that the animal that lives in trees would be a decent climber right? But nooooo they're skulls are full of a special fluid meant to protect their brains harsh impact, due to the sheer amount that they fall out of trees.
But what's the point of having a skull full of shock absorbing juice, if the animal is already irredeemably stupid? We all know that the more wrinkles on your brain, the smarter you are, so no one was surprised to find out that koalas are baby bottom smooth between the ears. They've also got one of the smallest brains for a mammal.
And now you know why koalas are awful. You're welcome.
Oh and if you wanna see a specific animal covered let the dumbass know.
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myhaikyuuthings · 4 years ago
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Bf Hc's for Kageyama bokuto and iwaizumi?
oh my babies, yes ofc!
Boyfriend Headcanons
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Kageyama: 
very shy when you first start dating
you’re most likely his first relationship so he has no idea what he’s doing
will leave milk on your desk for you, share his milk and even buy your own whenever he buys himself one
would l o v e for you to come to his practices and games
bonus points if you help him practice
spending time helping him practice is the quickest way to get him to open up, fall harder for you And you get more time with him
it’s really a win win to help him out
he loves you 50.1% and volleyball 49.9%
does he love you 100%? yes of course but he also loves volleyball and if you ask him to choose between the two of you? he will have a very very hard time 
i feel like he’s the type to absolutely lose himself in a kiss
hes not huge on PDA but if you kiss him in public, he literally can’t help himself
he thinks he’s addicted to your kisses
doesn’t show affection much in the start he doesn’t know how
but once he gets comfortable with you and you start showing him more affection? he wants it Constantly
hold his hand, please
if you’re cuddling his head is either on your chest while you play with his hair, or you’re laying with your foreheads touching just enjoying being with each other
not the noticeably jealous type but he definitely has his tipping point
he tries not to step in if you’re talking to someone or someone’s flirting with you, he trusts you fully
but if he thinks for one second he Could lose you to that person or you look uncomfortable he will step in and not feel bad about it
a lot of your dates are volleyball related tbh
going to watch games together, practicing together etc
but he likes quiet dates too, take him to a park or a coffee shop and he’s thriving 
actually really good at communication tbh
if he has an issue with you, he comes directly to you about it almost immediately
he doesn’t like having to overthink if he’s got something to be upset about or not he’d rather confront the problem together
expects the same from you, but understands if sometimes you just Can’t bring up what’s bothering you
will wait impatiently for you to come to him
he just really loves you and wants to make you happy, whatever that is for you 
12/10 boyfriend
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Bokuto: 
i’m in love with him so this is a little biased I’m sorry
upfront about everything
he’s upset? you will know and you’ll know why within seconds
really bad at hiding his emotions as we know
but you appreciate that! never have to play the guessing game with this boy
he is so so so affectionate 
from day one, his hand is practically glued to yours as long as you’re okay with that
we love a respectful king
he needs constant validation tbh and he deserves the praise so it balances out
doubts whether or not he’s good enough  for you sometimes
he just thinks you’re the epitome of perfection, so he can’t wrap his head around why you would want to be with him of all people
lowkey insecure and idk if thats an unpopular hc but i stand by it
you get promoted to #1 Bokuto wrangler when he’s having an episode
go to his games, his practices everything
when you’re there  he’s at the top of his game, his spikes? unstoppable. his blocks? unbreakable
if you happen to miss a game or practice they might as well not even put him on the court
hes so sad omg
he understands Why you couldn’t come, doesn’t help that he’s missing you
the type to want to be around you 24/7
if you have classes together he will hold your hand throughout the entire class, usually leaving his dominant hand useless because he doesn’t want to mess up Your notes
will 100% ask to borrow your notes
study dates! you rarely get anything done but if you promise him a kiss for every question he gets right you have his attention for a solid hour
after that he gets distracted by your kisses
loves loves loves kissing you
if you don’t like kisses on the lips? no problem he will pepper your cheeks with kisses
gets jealous very easily
won’t approach you about it though
just goes directly into ‘emo mode’ 
takes a little bit to get him out of it tbh
usually a simple “you know you’re the only person I want right? I love you, you’re my person” and a kiss to his forehead and he’ll perk back up
kuroo flirts with you just to throw Bokuto off his game when they play against each other
if you’re ever uncomfortable with anything, he will remove you from that situation
has thrown you over his shoulder to get you out of situations before with no issue
loves to work out with you! if you’re not into working out he will beg you to let him lift you instead of weights
doesn’t matter what you weigh, he can and will lift you
constantly reassures you that you are the most beautiful, intelligent, caring person he’s ever met
you’re sad? not on his watch. he will listen to whatever is upsetting you and if he can fix it he Will, if not? he’s doing everything in his power to cheer you up
cuddling him is a mess. you don’t have a set position you two cuddle in
the most common is you laying your head on his thick thighs while he runs his hands through your hair and vice versa
big spoon, little spoon, he doesn’t care as long as he can touch you
when it’s too hot to cuddle, he Must at the very least have a pinky touching you or he gets restless
15/10 respectful, funny, kind, talented boyfriend. marry him seriously  he will marry you with zero hesitation
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Iwaizumi: 
  you two roast Oikawa together #couplegoals
he’s big on taking care of yourself, proper sleep a good diet lots of water
if you’re forgetful like me and don’t always take care of yourself properly he will text you every few hours to remind you to drink water and eat something
not huge on pda, mainly because of Oikawa, he doesn’t want to hear his mouth
but if you love pda, he’ll compromise, just try to keep it to a minimum around the captain
no shame in his love for you though
if you tell him you don’t feel the love he is doing a full 180
will full on make out with you in front of Oikawa if that’s what it takes for you to realize how important you are to him
come to his games. he won’t ask you to nor does he expect you to but it really helps him
knowing that  you’re out in the crowd cheering for him, it’s his biggest motivation
bonus points if you’re louder than Oikawa’s fanclub
loves going on dates with you
the type to pick you up at random times for impromptu dates just because he misses you
not super clingy but definitely likes having you around, he knows you both have your own life and he respects that but if you can spend time together he wants to
will leave practice early if you tell him you’re sad or miss him
super cuddly in the privacy of your own home
wrap yourself around him like a koala and he is in heaven
honestly just loves feeling like he can protect you, even if you can protect yourself
will 100% help you study, and is super nice about it
you were skeptical after hearing the horror stories from Oikawa but honestly he has a ton of patience with you and will go over the same question for an hour until you understand it if necessary
just wants you to succeed 
another one who loves your kisses
he likes making out and everything but the small kisses mean more to him
when you kiss his cheek before a game, or press a kiss to the back of his hand while you’re walking together woooo
he just feels so loved and knows you have no other motive
with make outs theres always the chance the other person is just horny, but these? they’re so innocent and he can feel how much you care about him with them
not the greatest at expressing himself at first but not terrible either, you make do
once he fully opens up though, you know he loves you
won’t let you stay sad, if you’re upset for whatever reason hes just
“let’s go bully shittykawa that always makes me feel better”
if by some miracle that doesn’t help you, time for cuddles movies and calming tea
gives the b  e s t massages with no complaint
just a really good boyfriend 11/10 caring, funny, protective 
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powerosewaterpuff · 4 years ago
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YO ITS ME AGAIN , so um , some fear gas content in your au please , like fear gased dick and big bro jason comfort him
i genuinely have no excuse as to why this is so late, but oh my god school has been up my ass lately and i haven’t been able to get back into the groove of writing so I took this as an opportunity to build on that a bit. so tysm for the prompt! i rlly rly appreciate it hehe and again this had no excuse to be as late as it was ngl. but again this is my robin reversal au with jason being the oldest (i cant think of a good early hero name though ugh!) and dick being younger than him so enjoy! also so dick isn’t officially robin (he only does that when jason dies), but the persona still exists and he will join on major missions but bruce still has him in training so casual patrols are a no unless they have no other option for back up yk?
tw// there’s a slight mention of needles! it’s super short but i wanna be on the safe side as well as mild mention of cuts and scratches!
it took prodding. begging. and absolutely pleading to get bruce to agree to let jason and dick patrol together on their own. dick and or robin was not a constant on patrols with jason and bruce, as bruce wanted to ensure dick was fully equppied and trained before rushing into the field. it didn’t matter how much dick whined, or complained, or did as twice as many flipping kicks in training, the answer was always a solid no unless supervised or it was necessary. so it was a massive stretch to assume that bruce would agree to let them patrol together. they were practically in shock as bruce gave a nod after a few moments of silence. he even surprised himself. maybe it was the puppy eyed stare (mostly dick), or the reassurances that alfred would be on their comms the entire time, or even the full promise by jason that everything would be alright, but something made bruce say yes. more field training would be more than beneficial for dick anyways, (and that bright smile his youngest gave him and tight squeeze of a hug from his eldest didn’t hurt either).
the only promise jason was going to be able to fulfil was that scarecrow was going to rue the fucking day he decided to rear his ugly face out of arkham. it didn’t matter that bruce was beating the living shit out of him, holding no punches. jason was still brimming with rage. he hopped rooftop to rooftop, whipping his head around wildly as he searched for a fear gassed blur of neon colours. he wished he had been fucking a nanosecond faster, to reach out and pull dick from the blast of fear gas that swam through his nose and induced him in this fucking crazed frenzy. dick had just taken off his mask, right as jason was telling him to wait before bruce gave them the signal, and now jason was scouring the streets of gotham trying to find his brother. (he was going to fucking break scarecrow’s face, if bruce hadn’t already)
jason’s life was never one attributed with luck, it seemed like every possible slot in his pile was stacked firmly against him. except for when out of the corner of his vision he saw a stumbling mesh of a yellow cape climb onto a roof to his left. jason, took this as his initiative to attempt to stealthily sneak up next to dick, using his dark costume as an advantage.
he crept gently over to the building as he saw dick stumble onto his knees and he winced a bit as blood began to trickle down dick’s leg from the gashes beginning to form. dick was looking around wildly, almost in a desperate search for something. now, jason would’ve waited. he should’ve waited. bruce has drilled into his mind that dealing with victims of fear gas had to be done as meticulously and carefully as possible. dick shouldn’t have been any different, jason was able to hold to hold himself back. or he should’ve been able to.
it wasn’t until he saw dick scream out for his mother in a guttural rasp and leap towards the railings of the rooftop, did jason feel his legs take off as he stretched out, and managed to secure an arm around dick firmly. dick screeched even louder, wailing for his mother as he dug his nails into jason’s arms. jason gritted his teeth tightly but held on, because fuck that hurt. dick struggled and pushed, stamping his foot against jason’s leg and attempting to squirm out of his hold. but jason held on.
jason began attempting to reason with dick, he leaned his head down and gently placed it against dick’s. he murmured a bunch of fucking nothing as dick sobbed his throat raw. jason leaned closer to dick’s ear as dick began to shake in fear rather than anger and shut his eyes tight.
“dick? it’s jason, it’s just me. we’re on some fucking rooftop somewhere, and you are safe. okay? i’m holding you, and you’re safe, nothing is going to happen. bruce is gonna be here soon, and everything is going to be okay. i know you’re seeing god knows what, but i’m gonna get you out of this alright? i-i promise.”
jason couldn’t say he wasn’t dumbfounded when dick stopped angrily squirming around and began pressing his face into jason’s chest, with fat tears streaming down his face as he let out a wet sob. jason hesitantly wrapped his slightly bleeding arms around dick even tighter, curling up around him as he tried to push out the sound of dick’s sobs. he was never exactly good at dealing with dicks tears, he hated them so fucking much.
it didn’t take long for batman to arrive on the scene, but it was a scene he didn’t exactly like. his oldest son was cradling his youngest son as he heaved and sobbed. bruce silently stalked over, tapping jason on the shoulder as he waved his hands quietly, indicating that he could take dick off of his hands. jason was, not surprisingly, hesitant. (that untrustful hesitance was something, no matter how far jason did with his recovery, would always exist. that need to protect himself, or anyone he could care about no matter who it was against. that deeply rooted and innate need for self preservation, it marred jason’s soul with broad brush strokes. fading, but never leaving. )
jason almost shook himself into realization, realizing it was batman who was standing in front of him, and not someone of possible harm. he slowly unfurled his arms around dick, but was once again left dumbfounded when dick gripped onto the back of his uniform even tighter. the once muffled sobs got louder as dick desperately tried to hold onto jason. jason felt bruce’s stare, fucking digging into him, but he found himself not caring as he quickly curled back around dick. rocking back and forth, not bothering with the useless platitudes but keeping a firm lock on the back of dick’s neck and his waist. he peered up at batman and caught his gaze, and with a hushed agreement, they nodded at each other.
jason looped his arms around dick’s legs, his face twisting into a deeply set frown as dick’s sobs began morphing into hacking coughs, harsh and volatile. he managed to get himself standing upright as he pressed a kiss onto dick’s tear stained check, whilst still rubbing his back. the pain of others always had physically manifestions on jason. he fucking hated it. his mother would be splayed out on the couch, muttering incoherent fucking nonsense and jason would feel bile sting at the back of his throat, almost tempting him to kneel over and lurch as his body shook violently. and now, hearing dick’s fragmented breaths and shaky sobs, he felt like doing just that.
it had taken an effort, to get jason and dick safely off of the roof, and at the end bruce opted into scooping jason up who had dick clinging onto him like a koala, and simply carrying them both into the batmobile. alfred has already been long informed of the situation and had been able to promptly prepare an antidote that would be ready for their arrival. that did not mean, of course, that dick was compliant in taking the antidote. it took shushing and holding and soft whispers to get him to stop squirming enough for the needle to safely prick through his skin. alfred had opted to use little superman stickers afterwards, they were always dick’s favourite.
it had taken a while for dick to become conscious again, as alfred had added just a touch of sedatives to the antidote. just to help dick relax. when he did wake up, the world around him looking slightly fuzzy around the corners, he found himself encased in two sets of arms. was he in bruce’s bed? dick attempted to sit up but was met with a hand in his face pushing him back down, he turned his head to the side to be met with hazy lime green eyes and a lazy smile.
“dickie, sleep. now. you’ll wake up bruce— dont look at me like that he’s a light sleeper and you fucking know it. now go back to sleep, we’ll talk in the morning.”
“I just woke up though, why am I going back to slee-.”
“sh. your voice is too loud this early in the morning.”
“you’re so annoyin—and get your hand off of me!”
“make me—slapping my hand isn’t doing anything, bud.”
“shut up. i didn’t ask.”
“you’re still not making me”
“i’ll kick you.”
“do it. c’mon. do it right now.”
“fine—stop pinching my cheeks, jay! ow, ow, ow.”
“stop kicking me, then i’ll stop pinching.”
“that’s not fair! who made you the king of rules, assh-.”
“boys.”
“sorry bruce.”
“i’m sorry, B.”
“i’ll whoop your ass tomorrow.”
“I’d like to see you try, you old sack of bones.”
and with a roll of the eyes, a feathery soft kiss was pressed into dick’s forehead. a soft smile curled at dicks lips afterwards, a warm fire nestling in his heart drove the lingering hazy darkness away. dick nuzzled closer into the bed sheets as the two sets of arms encasing him only held on tighter. all curled under the fluffy bedsheets as the morning sun began to rise on the horizon, seeping through the cracks of the dark curtains as a kaleidoscope of colours painted the early morning sky.
fin.
i rlly should’ve made this longer with a little more detail but i haven’t gotten back into the groove of creative writing yet so take this with a grain of salt lmao. but anywho tysm for reading and tysm for the prompt! again i rlly wanna get back into creative writing so hopefully i’ll written sm shit? hopefully? maybe? idk? but again tysm for reading and i am so so sorry for how long this took :]!!
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lollybliz · 5 years ago
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bout to make a Monster of a fic rec post here we go
heyo @jinx108! We’ll start with the complete ones because sometimes you’re just not in the mood to wait for the last chapter, you know? I don't remember details of all of these so i’m just going to copy the author’s summary rather than write my own. I am literally just going through my bookmarks, I got 400 of these to sort through. if ive talked to or am familiar with the author im gonna mention them, but if I mention you and you don't want me to have Please tell me and i’ll remove it.
If you’re not into spoilers Please Tread Carefully, I don't watch out for that stuff so I wont know to label it
1>Crushing Truth by Bunzuku: Tododeku. “Romance is hard enough for a teenager to understand when they have a good relationship role model. For Shoto, it takes two excited meddlers for him to even realize what his feelings really are.“
2>Disowned by b00mgh: tododeku + others. Unrated, some traumatic elements. “Shouto freaks out under a bridge and I use the word "grass" a lot more than I really should. Izuku does his stupid martyr thing and everyone makes continuous references to his propensity to break his bones. Aizawa goes "oh FUCK my kids are dying again" and his students use him as emotional (and physical) support. A friend requests angst, I say what kind, she say idk make someone get disowned and i say oh this I can absolutely provide my good buddy.”
3>cotton candy hands by @chonideno: Kiribaku. I will take Any excuse to rec this fic, its the most fluffy pile of feels Good Lord. also the first fic I ever bound into a physical book. “Studying to become a hero requires knowing how to take care of yourself. Sometimes you might need help on the way so if your crush offers to do your hair for you or to give you a well-deserved back rub, it'd be stupid to say no. A series of soft vignettes in which a love-struck Kirishima and a touch-starved Bakugou care for each other and it's definitely not making their hearts jump through hoops, they’re never this close to kissing, no, they're totally best friends bro“
4>Catching Sight of the Storm by neo7v: Kiribaku, tododeku. A considerable amount of Whump and related angst, and kinda sad tbh. “Blind. Quirkless. Useless.The first two things were stated clearly by the doctor that sat about five feet in front of Izuku. The third was a word that Kacchan called him everytime he failed to make the jump on whatever forest excursion they were on or when he ran into a tree because he hadn’t seen it. “I’m so, so sorry, Izuku.” Was his mom giving up on him already? But he could still be a hero if he tried hard enough, right? Quirkless or not. Blind or not. Just because Izuku was useless now didn’t mean he would stay that way forever, right? *** A Blind!Izuku AU”
5>Yell Heah by fakecharliebrown: Chatfic. M a n y pairings. technically complete, but part of an ongoing series. “Iida creates a group-chat for Class 1-A. It doesn't go as planned.“
6>Sunshine by Rosey_Note: BIG SAD. tw- failed suicide attempt. KiriKamiBaku. “They didn't deserve to put up with his crappy mood. Because Denki Kaminari did not feel like Sunshine right now. And they deserved sunshine. In fact, Denki didn't feel much of anything right now.“
7>Electric Connection by  Onlymostydead: ShinKami. “Kaminari's quirk has always had... Weird side affects. Like his ADHD. And his constant energy. And his insomnia, which wouldn't leave him be right now, when he really needed to just get some sleep. But, thankfully, he has good friends.“
8>The Best (The Worst) by Onlymostydead: no romantic pairing. tw- rampant transphobia, both outside and internalized. “Bakugou Katsuki has known who he was since he was four years old. He was a boy, it was as simple as that. Around his friends, at school... But things couldn't just be that simple, could they?“
9>Lichtenberg Figures by Q_loves_you: no definite romantic pairing. “Kaminari Denki has a very powerful force of nature running through his body. Kaminari Denki doesn't want to hurt anybody. He doesn't always get what he wants, and "anybody" does generally include himself.“
10>Eventuality by KikaTouka: ill be honest I don't remember this one at all, I maaaay not have read it yet :/. anyway. ShinKami. “Shinsou learns more than just hero lessons after being transferred to 1-A.“
11>Pickup Lines for the Soul by MustardSoup: ShinKami. “Denki is twelve when he is flicking through the TV channels and lands on an old RomCom movie about soulmate marks – specifically the same type that he has. “I can’t believe I’ve had to walk around with a cheap pickup line written on my ankle my entire life because of you!” The leading lady yells at the leading man as he stares at her in awe. Denki laughs. “Oh no.” His mother says, watching him. “Oh no, indeed.” His sister repeats quietly.“
12>caught in my own web by @anxioussailorsoldier: ShinKami. “Shinsou needs some help after getting caught up in his capture weapon. Kaminari enters from stage left.“
13>not so summer love by nataliya: ShinKami. “Class 2-B’s common room, although typically quiet, was currently filled with five students—three slowly giving up on homework, one bitching about noise and another that rushes through the front door. “We’ve been waiting for you—” Mina starts, but Kaminari’s vaulting over the back of the couch, eyes wide as he practically buzzes out of his skin, emitting light like crazy as currents dazzle across strands of hair. “I have a big ugly crush,” He steps off the couch and onto the coffee table, much to Bakugou’s chagrin, “On big ugly Shinsou.””
14>Blamed by coldandhotsoba: ShinKami. Tw- they fuckin kill a guy and its a lil nasty. “This was not how the day was supposed to end. They were supposed to end the day like they do most nights.  Kaminari clutching onto him like a koala as he slept, wrapped in the millions of tacky blankets Kaminari had bought. Warm and safe in their bed. It was not supposed to end with both of them tied up in some cold metal room.“
15>Lightning Scars by Present-Mics-Scream (write_your_way_out): Shinkami. “It's hard to be confident in your abilities when you're surrounded by people with incredible quirks. Shinsou Hitoshi would know better than anyone. Sure, he was admitted to the hero course in his second year, but being admitted to the hero course, and keeping up with the rest of the class are two different things. Lucky for him, Kaminari is there to prove that the flashiest quirks come with the largest drawbacks.“
16>See No Evil, Hear No Evil by randomfan188: no romantic pairing. “Kaminari Denki is legally blind. When he forgets to wear his contacts and breaks down during math class, comfort appears in the strangest of ways.“
17>how not to enjoy the weather, an article by kaminari denki by dreamtowns: no defined romantic pairing. “If there was one thing Kaminari hated the most in a world wth villains, it would have to be thunderstorms.“
18>”Studying” by emmyrox22: ShinKami, EraserMic. “Shinsou and Kaminari have been “studying” together for a while (but not for school). Shinsou gets stopped by his dads on the way to another “study” session and mistakes are made“
19>Weaknesses by sunflowerstorm: ShinKami. “Kaminari's quirk and storms compliment each other in the worst way, but he's convinced he can deal with it on his own... until he really can't any longer. When Shinsou accidentally overhears Aizawa confronting Kaminari about recent changes in behaviour and hears about the hell his quirks been putting him through, he can't just pretend he never heard. He wants to help.“
20>it’s hurt denki hours by memeingfultrash: ShinKami + others. ““Certain members of our class are...under the impression that...you’re the traitor.” Denki’s body went cold and felt like he was going to short circuit. ~some of class 1a believes that denki is the traitor and avoid him”
21>Petition to replace Mineta with Shinsou- (signed by Kaminari Denki) by CharaTheQuartz: ShinKami + others. This is one of my favorites, I go back to reread it from time to time. It SAYS 41/42, but that's just a glitch cus chapter 36 doesn't exist for some reason, I talked to the author about it and its fine. “Mineta brings shame to the color purple. You know who does not bring shame to the rich color, but pride and sexual tension to one infatuated Kaminari Denki instead? Shinsou Hitoshi, aka sexy zombie man, aka the most perfect hunk of a man to walk planet earth, aka future husband. Shinsou has finally gotten his chance to prove himself to the hero course, and he did more than prove himself. The only question left unanswered is whether he will start in A or B, and how Kaminari can manipulate the end result.“
22>How to Get a Boyfriend (in Four Easy Steps!) by e1ana: ShinKami, EraserMic, + others. “Step 1: Get kicked out of the house by your homophobic parents. Step 2: Run headfirst into your brooding, mysterious crush. Step 3: Sleep in his dad’s (see: your homeroom teacher) house Step 4: Watch everything you thought you knew go to shit. This isn’t exactly the sweet, romantic plan that Kaminari Denki longed for. Will everything be ok, or will step 5 be to crash and burn?“
23>Bakugou and Todoroki’s Foolproof 5-Step Plan to Fuck with Mineta Minoru by Anubis_2701: Kiribaku, TodoDeku, + others. This is another one of my favorites, and the one I am currently folding and sewing into a physical book. you learn how to do funny things when bored and quarantined ig. “It was a simple enough idea; screw around with the resident bastard of Class 1-A to let him know that his medieval ways and perverted behaviour weren't going to be tolerated by even the most career-focused of UA's students. To say that things had snowballed was an understatement. Todoroki had no idea how he had ended up sitting on Bakugou's floor at 1 am, holding a dossier of incriminating material that would make the FBI slobber, but he wasn't sure he wanted to know. The long and short of it was, fuck Mineta.”
24>Colour Theory by chancellorxofxtrash: TodoBakuDeku. this one’s a series. “Midoriya/Bakugo/Todoroki slow burn soulmate AU. All three of them are nerds with their own emotional issues, trying to navigate their way through becoming heroes, and their own relationship with each other.“
25>Summer Sunshine by Mara97: TodoDeku. Ever want a Barbie in a mermaid tale/Bnha crossover? No? well here you go anyway! “Instead of worrying about college, Izuku spends his summer vacation finding out his father is, supposedly, a dead merman king and going on a quest to dethrone the current king, Endeavor. Along the way, Izuku becomes close to the three journeying with him, makes friends with strangers, starts crushing on an unattainable prince, and, in the end, learns to love himself. Oh, and he saves a kingdom, too.“
26>The snowflakes on our skin and the flames in our soul are one (and the same), my love by missunderstuffyou: TodoDeku, Kiribaku. this is one of the ones I keep a running reread comment going on. its at,,, 6, atm.  “Before your quirk begins to present itself, the soulmate link comes through, and suddenly whatever you write upon your own skin appears on the body of your soulmate. As your soulmate writes to you, the emotions they feel follow through the ink.Izuku Midoriya is four years and a few months old when he first feels the slight ebbing in his arms. It doesn’t hurt… he can just feel something, and it’s enough to make him sprint into his mother’s arms screaming that his quirk is coming. She had been washing in the kitchen, and the sudden screech as her son rockets into her side is enough to make her jump with panic, immediately grabbing at him and looking for cuts and bumps before she understands his words and the stupidly bright, alight smile on his face with large, watery, hopeful eyes. Shoto Todoroki doesn’t feel his soulmate connection open up. It is drowned in the aches of a small body worked far too hard.“
27>It was dark inside the closet by Chad_Champion69420: Pre-ShinDeku? maybe? its tagged shindeku but like. it’ll make sense if you read it. “Midoriya is invited to a party. He and Shinsou decide to play a little trick on the rest of the party during Seven Minutes in Heaven.”
28>how to woo your local trash gremlin: a comprehensive guide by Todoroki shouto by wonhaebunny: TodoBaku. this is the fic that dragged me into todobaku, fun fact. “five times shouto tries to confess to bakugou, and one time he doesn't bother tryingaka: wikihow is a scam and bakugou is a terrible, terrible boy“
29>top ten photos taken right before disaster by Shookspeare: ShinDeku. “Izuku participates in a harmless prank, only to end up ruining it and running for dear life.“
30>Secrets to Share by pechebaie: no definite romantic pairing. “Kirishima comes out first, and nothing changes. Kirishima and Kaminari still hang out to complain about class and talk about boys - and sometimes girls, too, in Kaminari’s case; he still plans stupid pranks with Sero that get them sent to the principal’s or nurse’s office every time; Ashido still kicks his ass at Mario Kart without hesitation; and Bakugou doesn’t get angry at him any more than he usually does.“
31>What One Hides by Pinalinet: TodoDeku. “All Might gives class 1-A an unusual assignment that results in Midoriya Izuku and Todoroki Shouto attending a weekly acting class. But with a mysterious villain targeting individuals without Quirks, and a developing issue of Todoroki's own, an after-school assignment is the least of their worries.“
32>whether or not we’re fated, we’re meant to be by juurensha: KINDA SPOILERY. TodoDeku + others. “Todoroki didn’t have a soulmark for most of his life.His siblings all did, but up until the day of the U.A. entrance exam, he had shoved the idea aside. It’s not like they could help him anyway. And then a 9 appears on his chest, and a green-haired boy barrels into his life with a fire and ice soulmark on his arms, and suddenly Todoroki cares very much about all this could mean.”
33>The Midnight Shift by meiishu @meiishu @totallytodoroki (idk which you’d rather I attach so I went with both): ShinKami. ““Hey Toshi,” Denki says, and he laughs, clearly embarrassed. He’s got on a jean jacket that did him absolutely no help and a white tee shirt that is currently stuck to his torso. It’s got a pikachu design in the center. “By any chance, do you sell umbrellas?” “You really went out in this weather.” Hitoshi deadpans, instead of dignifying that with an answer. or hitoshi works the midnight shift at the gas station, which also doubles as a pokestop for pokemon go. of course, denki is a regular.”
34>Rock the House by AkabaneKayo: ShinKami. “It wasn’t just his bed. It was his entire fucking room shaking. Only one thought crossed his mind at that moment: “Holy shit. My room is haunted.”“
35>Technically, they’re morning kisses by CharaTheQuartz: ShinKami. “Most nights, Shinsou cannot fall sleep. Neither can Kaminari. It seems counterproductive to have a sleepover then, but they try to make it work. And they fail, but that is okay.“
36>someone to call mine by nearly_theyre: ShinKami, EraserMic “From: Me wish you were here, denks From: kitten 💛💘💛 what if i was tho? OR Four times Denki snuck into Hitoshi's room and one time he walked through the front door.“
37>Pretty by Onlymostydead (noticing some repeat authors? me too): no definite romantic pairing. “(Or, Kaminari still can't figure out bra clasps.) Kaminari has never really felt good about himself. Herself? Whichever way, not knowing doesn't make anything easier. Especially when he (she?) and Mina have their bodies swapped during training, and everything seems too right.“
38>If I offer you my hand, will you take it? by bleukitsune: Kiribaku. SPOILERY. ““Why?” Kirishima leaned back on his hands, trying to create some space between them. Too close. The ash-blond looked really nervous, his usually arrogant and cunning demeanor gone. “What do you see when you look at me? Kirishima is worried. Bakugou is hurting. After his confrontation with Midoriya, he finally reaches out to him. “
Theres way more but I haven't tagged them properly yet so that m a y come later if I can ever finish going through and adding my sorting tags.
and then a last few that Are Not Complete but im really very fond of them. not as many as id like to add, but my hands are getting tired tbh.
39>State of Mind by GuardianOfTheLoaf: no relationship YET but its looking like it’ll be either tododeku or shindeku, probably the former. EraserMic. tw- childhood neglect and severe depression. Izuku’s not a happy kid. “Izuku was a late bloomer, his quirk lying dormant until his tenth birthday when in a fit of emotion he grabs his mother and she disappears. With All Might slowly restoring his confidence Izuku begins the difficult journey into becoming a hero.“ 18/? chapters.
40>Izuku Eats His Problems by CosmicAce: ShinDeku. Izuku’s a flerkin, what more could you want? “His whole life, Izuku Midoriya was taught to keep his powers, his Quirk, hidden from the world. His kind were feared, hunted to near extinction because of it. He just wants to show people he’s different. That he can be a HERO. And nothing is going to stop him. Even if his Quirk IS like an eldritch abomination.“ 43/? chapters
and then probably my current favorite bnha fic- although it fights with Apertum Mortem for that spot but that ones d a r k and not here-
41>family of the year by periiwren: EraserMic. “Hitoshi is done. Done with moving around every few months to a couple that will scrutinize him and eventually dump him right back where he started. Good thing he’s well past his strike limit now- at least he can stay in one place, be content to age out of the system and finish out his training with Aizawa. Maybe transfer into the hero course, maybe be a hero- but none of that was guaranteed. The only thing for sure was that he was going to stay in that center for the rest of his childhood. Or so he thought- because Aizawa Shouta and Yamada Hizashi have other plans.“ 24/? chapters. we’ve been informed that this one’s gonne be l o n g and im Very Grateful.
42>Here There Be Dragons by here_and_there: pre-ShinDeku. “Izuku looked at the small circle Aizawa had motioned to in front of them. "I won't fit," he whispered, thinking. He raised his hand, tentatively. Sighing, Aizawa grumbled, "What?" "I-I have a question. Actually, two." His teacher just stared at him, unimpressed. Izuku continued. "Can we activate our quirks before we step into the ring?" Aizawa looked up into the sky, muttering something Izuku didn't hear. "If you must." "O-Okay. Uh, second question. You said we have to stay inside the circle, right?" "Yes." The man looked disappointed, not only in Izuku but in himself for letting the kid speak. "Great. Uh... does that include tails?"“ 6/? chapters.
43>Another Option by sandersonsister: TodoBakuDeku, Touya/Hawks, Dabi/Hawks. Potentially Spoilery, depends on whether horikoshi has the guts to confirm Touya. this one is waiting around the corner with a baseball bat, its really cute, and then r e a l l y painful. it might be getting better though. maybe. it might be getting worse. “When Touya stops his mother from hurting Shouto, he decides enough is enough. He needs to get out of this house and he's taking his baby brother with him.“ 33/? chapters.
That's it i’m done for now, oof. maybe ill edit more onto this post later, maybe i’ll just make another one. hope some of these work!
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awkwardpenguinproductions · 4 years ago
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Melee
Part 3 of the Dragon of the Yuyan
Read on AO3 | Series Masterpost
Zuko has been living in Pohuai Stronghold for two months, and would very much like winter to be over now, please.
It had snowed a few weeks ago, just enough to cover the top of one's foot when one stepped in it, and Zuko had hated it at first sight. There was just something unnatural about how Koh-damned cold it was, forcing his inner flame to burn hotter in his chest to compensate. Most of the snow is gone now, only little piles of dirty slush left in the corners of the yards where the weak winter sun doesn't quite reach, but it is now somehow colder than it had been when the snow had first arrived. None of the other Archers are firebenders, and Zuko honestly has no idea how they cope—Kai actually seems to like it, but Kai is also mildly insane and not to be trusted.
Zuko is now triply glad that he took the Commander's deal. He gets three meals a day (plus access to all the snacks he could ever want—all he has to do is blink and people shove food at him), he'll be learning from the most badass soldiers in the entire world (although he has yet to actually start training—Dr. Atsuko says he needs to gain more weight before she'll let him even touch a bow, and Dr. Atsuko is really scary so he doesn't want to cross her), and he gets Agni-blessed warm clothes (Zuko will bite anyone who touches his koala-sheep wool cloak—Zheng and the twins make fun of him for his attachment to it, but Zuko ignores them with the ease of someone who literally couldn’t care less). And all Zuko has to do is figure out new and interesting ways of getting past the Stronghold’s security, like the voyage through the ventilation system he’d taken last week that had allowed him to access the single most secure prisoner holding cell in the entire complex without even Captain Katsuro, leader of Banli Squad and the oldest and most experienced member of the Troop, knowing where he was.
Considering that two months ago he’d been staring starvation in the face, Zuko feels that maybe the luck that he’d used up just by being born is starting to come back.
Now if only winter would end.
Zuko is sitting with Kai and Jiyoti at breakfast in the mess, watching with increasing skepticism as Kai discourses the merits of arrows made out of ice, of all things. He’s neglecting his bao, and Zuko waits until Jiyoti distracts him with a salient point—how would one make ice arrows without waterbenders?—before swiping one. Mmm, sweet bean paste.
Kai pouts at him when he realizes what has happened, but Zuko is distracted by Commander Toshiaki coming their way.
Privates, Zuko, good morning, he greets them.
Good morning, Commander, they sign in unison.
Zuko, you need to report to Dr. Atsuko in the medical wing when you finish breakfast, the Commander informs him.
Zuko nods. Yes, sir.
Commander Toshiaki nods, the faintest trace of a smile playing at his stern expression, and Zuko feels like a million gold pieces. The Commander had been impressed with his breaking into the secure cell, and Zuko can’t wait to impress him again on his next “mission” to test the Stronghold’s security. He can only hope that nobody’s too disappointed when he inevitably proves how much of a failure he is at archery and non-bending hand-to-hand. He’s already resigned himself to never completing his firebending training, since the Yuyan are all non-benders. He’ll just have to hope that he never gets into a situation where firebending is his only weapon. He wonders if the Commander will let him continue learning the dao, since it’s a non-bending form of combat.
He still needs to be cleared by Dr. Atsuko though, so after Commander Toshiaki signs for them to carry on, and he steals Kai’s other bao (and ducks the listless protesting swipe the older boy aims at his head), Zuko heads over to the medical wing.
For once, the CMO seems pleased to see him, and within moments Zuko is stripped to his underwear and standing on a scale. He tucks his hands in his armpits and shivers in the chilly air of the medical wing.
“Good news, you’re just on the right side of healthy weight for a boy your age and height,” Dr. Atsuko declares briskly. She allows him to step down and get dressed while she scribbles on the scroll that contains his medical information.
Does that mean I can start training? He asks, smiling hopefully.
Dr. Atsuko rolls her eyes. “Yes, yes, you can start training, put that look away, you brat,” she grouses. “But don’t overdo it, understand? If I see you in here because you did something stupid, I’ll have Toshiaki triple the time you spend on the bench for recovery.”
Zuko nods rapidly as Dr. Atsuko scribbles on a small square of paper and rolls it up. “Take this to Toshiaki,” she orders, handing the note to him. “And tell the Commander that I’ll have his hide if he breaks you in ways I can’t fix.”
Zuko has absolutely no intention of telling the Commander that; he’s not a complete idiot, no matter how stupid Father and Azula and his tutors and combat instructors thought he was. He knows perfectly well that he’s exactly one screw-up away from being tossed out of the Stronghold on his ass, Zheng and the twins never let him forget it. Better to keep his mouth shut and his hands still unless spoken to directly—he’ll likely have fewer bruises for doing so when they do finally get sick of him and kick him out.
The sentiment is appreciated, though. Dr. Atsuko is scary (not quite as scary as Azula—it’s doubtful that anyone’s as scary as Azula except maybe Father—but Dr. Atsuko is close), but she cares in her own way. Zuko forms the Flame and bows, she scoffs and waves him off, and he departs.
His grin hurts his face, especially where the muscle of his cheek wrinkles the stiffened scar tissue of his burn. He doesn’t care, though—he can finally start training with the Troop, instead of watching from the side like someone’s useless kid brother! He can’t wait to tell Kai!
But first he has to find Commander Toshiaki. At this time of the morning, the Troop is usually on the target range, working on speed drills.
Commander Toshiaki is exactly where Zuko thought he would be, along with the rest of the Troop. He presents the scroll to the Commander, who favors him with a quietly pleased expression.
This is excellent news, he declares. He then assigns Zuko to Chihese Squad for PT and weapons training. Zuko and Kai exchange grins, and Zuko ignores the ferocious glare Zheng sends him.
Captain Hiroki, Chihese Squad’s leader, looks Zuko up and down. Ever touch a weapon before, kid? He asks, and Zuko can see the sarcasm in the way his hip is cocked, his half-lidded eyes, and the smirk lurking just below the surface of his stoically flat mouth.
Something about him reminds Zuko of Azula when she was fishing for something to torment him with, and his spine snaps straight. I studied the dual dao for three years with Master Piandao before my father demanded I stop, he answers, keeping his hands and expression tightly under control. Father forbidding him from continuing his studies with the Master is a memory almost as painful as that of the Agni Kai, but he powers through it, refusing to let this potential Azula-replacement have any kind of ammunition against him. My Uncle helped me continue learning, as well as helping me learn other blade techniques. Such as this.
As fast as thought, Zuko draws his pearl dagger, flips it to grasp by the tip of the blade, and throws it handle-first at the closest archery target. It hits a fraction of an inch off of dead center, buried to the hilt. The target is at least twenty feet away.
Kai looks like Summer Solstice has come early. Mika and Jiyoti are smirking. Zheng is audibly grinding his teeth, dark eyes narrow and furious. Captain Hiroki looks… impressed.
The Captain walks over to the target, pulls out the dagger, and examines it as he walks back. Zuko watches like an eagle-hawk, but all Captain Hiroki does is look it over, shine the blade on the sleeve of his tunic, and hand it back to Zuko, who immediately tucks it into the sheath in his belt.
Very nicely done, he signs, all traces of sarcasm gone from his face and body. And quick, that’ll serve you well with a good set of real throwing knives. Why did your father make you stop learning from Piandao? I thought he was supposed to be the best swordmaster in the Fire Nation.
My father didn't like Piandao, and believed that weapons were beneath a firebender's dignity, Zuko replies, and doesn't miss the sneer that crosses Zheng's face. Annoyance churns in his gut, but Zuko's been ignoring Zheng's sneers and jibes since he was able to understand the Yuyan hand-language, and he's not about to break that streak.
A firebender, Captain Hiroki signs, almost absentmindedly, hairless eyebrows furrowed in thought.
I'm not very good, Zuko shrugs.
It seems as though Zheng can no longer hold his peace. You can't possibly be going through with this, Cap! He signs, fury in every line of his body, his hands flying so fast that Zuko can just barely keep up. He's a thief! He should be shipped back to the Home Islands in chains, not be trained in our ways like he's actually one of us!
Shut up, Zheng! Kai's hands snap out. Don't pretend you're not just jealous that Zuko's better at shadow walking at fourteen than you are at twenty!
Why would I be jealous of a spirits-damned street rat? Zheng replies, sneering. He's obviously lying about studying under Piandao, wanting the Captain to fawn over him the way the Commander does, while all he's doing is using his ridiculous street rat tricks to make it seem like he's actually useful and not planning on selling us all out to the closest dirt-eater forces––
Zuko can't take it anymore. He's many things: a failure, a soft-hearted weakling, a useless embarrassment to his father and family. But he is here now in this new life because he believed, and still believes, that it is wrong to sacrifice loyal subjects of the Fire Nation as battle fodder. The idea that he could be a traitor to his people burns even worse than Father's fire-whips, or the handful of flames he'd held to Zuko's face.
He breathes, and exhales fire. The force of his rage produces a plume of reddish gold flame that roars toward Zheng like a stampeding komodo-rhino, causing everyone to jump back to avoid being burned.  
Zheng is white under his Yuyan tan. Kai once again looks like the Summer Solstice has come early, with his birthday next. Mika's eyes are wide, and Jiyoti is practically hiding behind the older woman. Captain Hiroki looks thunderous, but before he can even move his hands, Zuko is already signing.
You don't know a damn thing about me, you giant piece of shit. His entire body is trembling, he’s so angry he feels like he’ll actually burst into flames. He doesn't even care that he might get kicked out for this. Zheng's been a boarcupine quill in his side since Commander Toshiaki and Chihese Squad had pinned him to the storeroom wall, and Zuko is done. I stole so that I wouldn't starve, because I was dumped in the middle of Koh-damned nowhere with the clothes on my back and a single useless knife, and I didn't even make it out of the Stronghold before I got caught anyway. I was going to die. I was supposed to die, but the Commander decided to let me live because he thought I would be useful. And I will never be able to repay him for that, for giving me a home and a new life, so I will stay here and learn everything I can and be as useful as I can possibly be, and you can shut up and stay the fuck out of my way!
He can feel the force of his glare in the pressure on his temples and the ache in his scar where his left eyebrow used to be, and the expression must be something because even Captain Hiroki seems reluctant to get close to him.
A hand lands gently on his shoulder, and Zuko flinches hard before whirling around to face the new threat, which is—
Kai, with an easy smile on his face, though his dark eyes are pained. Come on, he signs, let’s go to Master Arata and get you kitted out. Cap can deal with Zheng.
Kai leads him away, and Zuko glances back to see Captain Hiroki turning on a still white-faced Zheng.
Master Arata, the bowmaker for the Yuyan Archers, takes one look at Zuko and gives him the one bow with the single lightest draw weight in the entire Stronghold. Kai laughs himself sick as Zuko tries and fails to draw the bowstring back to his chin.
The Commander finds them in one of the training areas used by the regular Army companies that are stationed at the Stronghold. Kai is showing Zuko the strengthening and conditioning exercises the Yuyan use as part of their archery training, and Zuko recognizes many of them from both firebending and sword training, so they're in the middle of a planking contest when boots appear in Zuko's vision. He falls flat on his face when he realizes just who those boots belong to.
He and Kai both snap to attention, but Zuko can't look anywhere but at the ground, shaking as he awaits the Commander's punishment for firebending at Zheng. His shoulders ache with tension. He wishes the Commander would just hit him and get it over with.
Boots reappear in his vision, and Zuko squeezes his eyes shut and braces for the impact.
And nothing happens. Slowly, the fuzzy buzz of panic enveloping Zuko like a suffocating blanket falls away, and after a few moments he gathers every scrap of courage he possesses and opens his eyes.
The Commander is crouching in front of him, his head level with Zuko's chest, looking up at him with calm dark gray eyes. In this position, Zuko is head and shoulders taller, instead of the Commander looming over him, and he can't understand why the Commander would do this because it has to be absolutely demeaning for the leader of one of the world's best strike forces to take such a position before a useless idiot child like him––
Peace, Cadet Zuko, Commander Toshiaki signs slowly, expression serene.
Oh. Duh. As if Zuko needed another reminder that he's an idiot.
Captain Hiroki has informed me of your altercation with Private Zheng, the Commander continues. As the instigator of the incident, Private Zheng has been reprimanded and assigned a punishment detail. He has also been transferred to Banli Squad, per recommendation from Captain Hiroki and Sergeant Mika. However, firebending at someone outside of training scenarios or active combat is forbidden here in the Stronghold, by order of Colonel Shinu, and I'm afraid that means that I need to give you a punishment detail as well.
I understand, sir, Zuko signs haltingly.
You are to report to the komodo-rhino barn half an hour after dawn for the next two weeks, where you will perform tasks assigned by Stablemaster Guo until the mess opens for breakfast, the Commander declares.
Zuko blinks. He can't have understood that correctly. The Commander wants him to help take care of the komodo-rhinos… as a punishment?
But he has definitely learned to hold his tongue in front of superiors, and has probably pushed his luck enough for the next year, so he simply signs Understood, sir, and bows with the Flame.
I have also spoken to the Stronghold's firebending master, and he is happy to take you on as a student, Commander Toshiaki adds. You will report to him at dawn every day after your punishment detail is complete. He wished me to inform you that he understands if you have gotten lax in your meditations in the recent past, but he expects you to resume them immediately, so that you are well in the habit once your training resumes.
For the second time in as many moments, Zuko is shocked. He honestly hadn't expected to be allowed to continue his firebending training, and he could admit that a small part of himself had been just a tiny bit relieved. Before, even with Uncle's intervention, firebending training had not been a pleasant activity. No one had dared to physically harm the Fire Prince, but Zuko knew full well how the palace masters compared him to Father, to Uncle Iroh, to Azula, and never really seemed to care if he hurt himself in the process of trying to prove himself worthy of them.
But now, there's no one to compare himself to other than the soldiers who bend, and the master who oversees them. Anyone to whom he might try to prove himself wouldn't care about his firebending, because they don't bend themselves. Zuko isn't the Fire Prince, the Crown Prince, anymore, he doesn't have anyone's boots to fill but his own.
And that is a very exciting prospect.
So he grins widely at the Commander and signs Yes sir!
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maximumsnow · 4 years ago
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Chapters: 6/? Fandom: Half Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware, HLVRAI - Fandom Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Gordon Freeman, Tommy Coolatta, Dr. Coomer (Half-Life), Bubby (Half-Life), Benrey (Half-Life) Additional Tags: Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-typical swearing, Basically an au exploring what if HLVRAI followed Half Life a little more closely, Au where there isn't a betrayal in that one spot, Mainly was wondering what would happen to the others if they hadn't been in on it., Some things change some don't, Oh also this is sort of intended as a not a game au
Summary: Anyone who knows original Half-Life knows that the ambush happens in that spot no matter what. What would have happened if the ambush was as rough for the others?
It felt like time itself froze when Gordon walked in, arm raised in greeting. Seeing Coomer try to kill a clone was… honestly still unsettling even if he had a vague reason for it. However, something about this image was wrong.
Coomer looked directly at him and cheerfully said, “Oh, hello there!”
And that’s when his heart dropped.
This couldn’t be his Dr. Coomer.
His eyes dropped to the limbless Coomer lying on the table, but before he could look any closer, the presumed clone started speaking again. “My clone!” The exclamation was a perfect copy of Coomer’s usual speaking pattern, and the unnerving similarity sent a shudder down Gordon’s spine.
In lieu of any explanation, the clone tensed his arms in preparation to swing, and Gordon found himself quickly moving towards him. He tripped over his words as he tried to distract the man with the sledgehammer. “Hey, uh, wait. Isn’t this a bit much?”
The previously still Coomer on the table jerked at the sound of Gordon’s voice, and the head turned towards him. Whatever was said became a muffled grunt due to the cloth.
Confusion overtook the other Coomer’s face as he tried to figure out what Gordon meant, and it allowed Gordon enough time to get next to him. “No, this is the perfect amount of force to take out a clone!” He exclaimed as he prepared to swing again.
The clone found the sledgehammer unmoving when he tried to move it. Gordon gripped the handle halfway down the weapon with both hands. The grip was difficult to maintain since he had kept the crowbar in hand, but he refused to let it budge even as the clone tried to pull it over his head.
Gordon could never beat Dr. Coomer in a strength contest.
The clone struggled against him, but the awkward angle and the added weight made it a losing battle. “It’s just a clone. Let me finish-”
Cutting through the bullshit, Gordon argued, “You’re not Dr. Coomer.”
That snapped the clone out of the persona he had been putting on. He let go of the sledgehammer to properly face Gordon. “… Yes I am. We’re all Dr. Coomer.” The flat tone dared Gordon to keep arguing.
Suddenly losing the tension of the impromptu tug-of-war on the sledgehammer nearly caused Gordon to tip over, but he caught himself in time to glance at the clone. The expressionless look on the clone’s face made Gordon drop the heavy sledgehammer and clutch the crowbar in front of him.
He didn’t even get to swing it before the clone charged into him. Despite Gordon’s height advantage and this clone’s apparent lack of cybernetics, it didn’t take much for Gordon to lose his balance as he struggled against the Coomer clone’s assault.
He saw stars as the back of his head connected with the hard floor, and it was a miracle he didn’t pass out again immediately.
It hurt.
He screamed in pain. “FUCK!”
The clone tried to cover Gordon’s mouth to stifle the sound, and in the ensuing scuffle, Gordon’s glasses got knocked askew. Even as he fought for his life, he could hear the clone mutter, “You won’t get in my way. As long as 13 doesn’t suspect me-”
The blurry figure of his assailant suddenly sat stock still as they heard the automatic door open.
Gordon could only see the white of a scientist’s uniform, and while that could be one of his friends, he didn’t know for sure.
Until the intruder spoke. “What the hell are you...” The snappy tone trailed off as Bubby presumably took in the scene.
“Get off.” The sharp order was emphasized by the pump of a shotgun, and Gordon felt the weight of the clone lift. Without someone trying to suffocate him, Gordon was able to readjust his glasses so he could see what was going on, but when he tried moving too much, his head started pounding.
Bubby had the shotgun trained on the clone, and with the look Bubby was giving him, Gordon was surprised that the clone hadn’t caught on fire yet. Once the clone was no longer too close to Gordon or the Coomer on the table, Bubby pulled the trigger.
Click.
No gunshot. Bubby looked down at the useless weapon.
“What? I just loaded-” Bubby was cut off as the clone lunged at him. The shotgun was dropped as Bubby was caught off guard in the sudden hand to hand struggle. Despite the surprise, Bubby was able to grab the hands reaching for his neck and held them away. At first, Bubby looked like he would overpower the clone. He was stronger than he looked, and it was easy to forget that fact.
Until the clone stomped on his bad foot, causing Bubby to let go and stagger backwards. The clone was quick to pounce on the opening and managed to shove the unbalanced scientist to the ground.
At this point, Gordon struggled to sit up as he fought his aching head and body, but the sudden action made the room spin. Shutting his eyes so that he could get his bearings, he patted the floor frantically as he tried to relocate the crowbar. His hand finally landed on something, and when he pulled it close, a familiar metallic grating sound as he it dragged across the floor told him that he managed to find it.
After a few seconds, the smell of smoke assaulted his nose, and it caused his eyes to snap open again. The clone had apparently tried to run back towards Gordon and the sledgehammer, but Bubby had managed to latch onto his leg with his hands. Fire was licking Bubby’s sleeves as it climbed down his arms and onto the clone’s leg.
The clone furiously tried to pull his leg away, but Bubby’s grip did not falter even as he was jerked around the floor. Fire climbed as he did up the clone’s body. More flames joined the existing ones even where Bubby wasn’t touching him, and soon the clone’s entire body was aflame.
That was when Gordon finally noticed the screaming over the ringing in his ears. It was so similar to Coomer’s screams of pain that it made it watching the scene unbearable. Despite knowing this wasn’t his friend, it still made a quiet voice in the back of his head question whether this was actually a clone or not.
Even though the clone himself admitted the deception, he couldn’t ignore the almost instinctive fear for his friends that kicked in. He managed to stagger to a standing position, and despite the obvious distraction in the room, he finally got a good look at the Dr. Coomer on the table.
Despite the head being turned towards the fight, Gordon could see the eyes were wide with terror, and there was a large red mark on the side of his head that was partially hidden by the curly white hair. A slashed hospital gown had been the only thing he had been deemed worthy to wear.
He was also trying his damnedest to move his limbless body towards the fight, even if he couldn’t really help.
This had to be his Dr. Coomer.
With a shaking hand, Gordon reached for the cloth that was covering the poor scientist’s mouth, and when he made contact with the back of Coomer’s head, he suddenly twitched and fixed Gordon with a fearful look.
It quickly melted to relief.
Until burning hands snatched him off the table.
“NO!”
Gordon wasn’t sure who yelled that. Or if it had been his and Bubby’s voices melding together.
The clone desperately held onto Coomer’s torso like a koala, clearly determined to either use him as a living shield or to take him down with him.
The fire was quickly spreading to Coomer’s clothing.
Gordon was so fixated on that sight that he missed seeing what Bubby was doing. Until he saw the bald scientist lunge towards the clone in a way that brought back a primal fear in Gordon. It reminded him way too much of how the feral prototypes had tried to bite his face off.
Well, Gordon could at least say Bubby didn’t aim for the face.
He sure bit the hell out of the clone’s shoulder as he tried to yank Coomer away, though.
With the clone distracted, Gordon quickly stumbled his way over to the fight and took the easy opportunity Bubby had provided. All he knew next was that he was swinging his crowbar at the clone’s head in fury.
A loud THUD sounded as the blow connected.
As the clone dropped to the ground like a burning rock, Bubby was finally able to yank Coomer away from his embrace and immediately worked on putting out the few flames that had managed to take hold.
Gordon just stood there in shock. He hadn’t expected him to go down so easily, but the clone wasn’t breathing or reacting to the fire still engulfing him.
Maybe he should put that out before they started smelling it...
The automatic doors opened again.
Gordon already had his crowbar up for another swing, and Bubby pulled Coomer closer to him.
“Mr.-Mr. Freeman? Dr. Bubby? What-What happened?”
Tommy was standing in the door carrying a much bigger gun than a pistol, and it was easy to see the extra ammunition poking out of his pockets.
The tension immediately eased, and Bubby took the opportunity to finally get the cloth removed from Coomer’s mouth.
“Oh thank God, it’s you, Tommy.” Gordon sighed in relief. “We uh-”
“Hello, Gordon!” Coomer’s voice still possessed its usual volume, startling the hell out of everyone in the room. In the silence that followed, he simply said, “My clone!”
“Yeah, uh, the Dr. Coomer we found wasn’t our Coomer,” Gordon tried to explain. “I found him trying to kill Coomer and things went south.”
“That’s vague as hell.”
“He was trying to collapse my head in like a rotten watermelon! And then tried to strangle Gordon!”
Gordon rolled his eyes, but there wasn’t much bite in the action. “… Yeah, and then Bubby came in-” He stopped as a question hit him, “Wait, how did you get here so quickly? I wasn’t gone for that long.”
“… I have my reasons.” Bubby was pointedly looking away from him. With Coomer no longer in danger of burning and able to speak, Bubby didn’t have an easy distraction for his hands, so he wandered over to the observation area to snoop around.
“Did you suspect something already?”
Bubby didn’t have a chance to deny the answer when Coomer spoke up, “Probably! The project was supposed to make a hive mind between me and my clones, but, well, things didn’t quite work out. In other words, no clone can perfectly impersonate me. Even if they try.” Despite starting in his typical chipper voice, the last few words were spoken softly.
Gordon didn’t like the realization that it had taken him so long to figure out something was wrong. There had been a few things that seemed off, but with how things had gone ever since the Resonance Cascade, it had faded into the background.
“Damn, you must know each other pretty well, if Bubby caught on so quickly.” The observation posed a question if they wanted to answer it, but it also left them an out if they chose not to elaborate.
Which they didn’t. Bubby was digging into a box he found, and Coomer had seemingly turned his attention back to Tommy.
Tommy hadn’t moved since the conversation started.
“Tommy?” Gordon went in his direction, and with the adrenaline wearing off, his body started its loud protesting of the treatment he had just given it. A few more bruises to join the already existing ones. He staggered, and that seemed to snap Tommy out of the daze he was in.
“Mr. Freeman?” The response came out so quietly that Gordon almost didn’t hear it. Tommy closed the gap between them and offered an arm to help Gordon stabilize before gently guiding him to the ground to sit. “Take-Take it easy.”
While appreciative of the concern directed towards himself, he was worried about Tommy. The guy had only gotten quieter as the day had progressed, and it seemed like he wasn’t entirely there. Before he could ask, Tommy had already left his side and went over to the very dead clone.
And fired a full clip into the corpse. Which was suddenly no longer burning.
Once again, everyone jumped at the loud, sudden noise, and Gordon called out, “Hey, he’s dead! He can’t hurt us anymore! Don’t waste the ammo.”
Tommy didn’t respond until the gun clicked to signify that the clip was empty. “Had to-had to make sure. They always say to uh, double-double tap, right?”
“That’s- That’s a bit more than just a double tap, man.” Despite the words, his voice didn’t have any reproach. He ended up patting the ground next to him, “Why don’t you rest a minute? You’ve been going non-stop for a while now.”
“I’m fine, Mr. Freeman. I gotta-I gotta make sure Dr. Coomer is okay.” Tommy temporarily dropped the gun to his side for a moment as he went to get a better look at Dr. Coomer.
Gordon thought about joining them, but his eyes started to flutter shut as their voices blurred into a background hum. Maybe just a few minutes…
“Are you alright?” The sudden question and the identity of the person asking surprised Gordon so much that he forgot to answer. Eyes snapping back open, he looked up at Bubby, who was cradling the shotgun from earlier again.
Instead of answering the question, he asked, “Isn’t that broken?”
“No, it’s just jammed, but I’m getting the shells out of it to use in a different one.” Bubby pointed the gun away from him as he started pulling out the ammo. “You probably shouldn’t throw guns like that anymore.” Once he finished, he nudged a green army supply box towards him. “Anyway, you shouldn’t be sleeping, so help me look through this.”
Despite the phrasing, as soon as Gordon opened the lid, Bubby walked away. Oh well. There wasn’t much else he could do, so he started to dig through the various supplies to see if there was anything they could take.
Which got boring really quickly when most of it was junk. To help keep his mind moving, he asked Coomer the first thing that came to mind, “Hey your, uh, clone mentioned something earlier and we overheard some soldiers talking about it. Did you see a monster alien thing running through?”
“Why of course, Gordon! You can clearly see the blood on the ceiling and walls from the soldiers it killed and from damage it took!”
Now that Gordon wasn’t preoccupied with saving Coomer, he finally took in the rest of the room. And Coomer wasn’t lying.
There was a blackened blood spray dried onto the ceiling which looked like it came from the monster, and there were a few splotches on the wall intermixed with a dark red from at least one injured or dead human.
Interestingly, the smear on the floor went around the table. Given some of the damage earlier, he didn’t think it would have cared about slamming into another piece of furniture, but apparently it had cared about this one. Or it was chasing someone who decided to go around.
He shuddered.
“It didn’t bother you at all?”
“Nope! When I heard the soldiers radio in that it was coming this way, I laid very still and kept very quiet!”
“And it just. Ignored you? And did you see what it looked like?”
“I had to keep my eyes closed, Gordon. Otherwise it might have guessed I was still alive thanks to my sparkling eyes!” The unexpected moment of pure self confidence drew a short laugh from Gordon, and Coomer continued. “I heard it stop and sniff, but given my current state, it must have assumed I was already dead!”
Current state.
Wait.
“Shit! Where the fuck are your arms and legs?!” Sure he noticed that they were missing when he first walked in, but given what he walked into, figuring out the hows and whys of the situation had fallen to the wayside.
“Are you fucking blind?” Bubby shouted from the observation room. “He’s been missing them this whole time!”
“I NOTICED THAT, MAN, BUT WHERE DID THEY GO?”
“Oh the military took them! They’re top of the line cybernetics, and I would be too difficult to contain if they didn’t remove them.” If this had been anyone else, Gordon would have interpreted this as overconfident bragging, but he knew Coomer well enough that he was stating a fact. “And it would increase the chances of at least something from me getting out.”
“Oh hell yes!” Bubby’s triumphant voice echoed through the chamber, drawing all present to look towards him. After a minute, he exited the observation room with some clothes and something metal.
“Good job, Bubby, you found my Power Legs! And clothes! I can’t wait to wear something other than this cold hospital gown.” The genuine warmth that seeped into Coomer’s voice eased something in Gordon’s chest. Sure Coomer had kept his chipper attitude throughout the conversation, but it had been teetering the line of being forced.
Not that Gordon could blame him.
Bubby thankfully seemed to know what he was doing when it came to helping Coomer get his legs reattached, so Gordon went back to focusing on Tommy. At some point during the conversation, Tommy had reloaded his gun and was standing near the far exit. Gordon called out, “What’s going on, man? We’ve taken out most of the soldiers by now, right?”
“There-there has to be at least one soldier ahead of us, Mr. Freeman. Whoever took out the mon-The monster. And the aliens have been just- They keep teleporting around.”
Yeah, Gordon felt dumb after that. Tommy was right, and he should have connected those dots on his own. “Sorry. Gordon’s head kinda hurts still.” He gingerly leaned his head forward and closed his eyes in hopes that the ache would stop.
He would have stayed like that if Tommy hadn’t crossed the room at record speed and knelt by him. “You-You okay? Don’t-You-You can’t fall asleep.”
Gordon opened his eyes to see Tommy’s frightened visage hovering nearby, and the closeness made a faint trembling in the other man’s frame much more obvious.
“I’m-I’m fine, Tommy, I wasn’t dozing off.” Right then, anyway. “I’m just...” He quickly debated lying, but he didn’t think he could make it believable. “It hurts a lot. The clone slammed me against the floor.” He raised an arm as if to rub the back of his head, but caught himself halfway and lowered it. “Just. Don’t worry about me, right now. You can keep guarding the door.”
After a moment of almost uncomfortable staring, Tommy nodded before retaking his spot.
They’d be so fucked without him.
Before anymore musing could happen, Gordon was distracted by watching Bubby help Coomer sit upright. He still had the hospital gown on covering his torso, and it was left on while Bubby buttoned up the shirt he threw on him. It wasn’t until there were a few buttons left that Bubby pulled the gown out through the hole.
Gordon had no idea why they went through such a complicated method of taking the gown off, but it felt like it was ringing a bell. Unfortunately, said bell made his head ache more, so he mentally shook that line of thinking for now.
Bubby must have somehow figured out the pants while getting the legs on, because once they had settled the shirt on, Coomer twisted himself around so that his lower legs hung off the table. The position allowed Bubby to shove on some socks and shoes with ease, and with that, Coomer scooted off the table.
Bubby was close enough for Coomer to lean against as he tested the legs, and soon he was standing upright with few troubles. His balance seemed to be off, but that could easily be attributed to his lack of arms and readjusting to having legs.
As an afterthought, Bubby tied the labcoat around Coomer’s waist. “Alright, that should do it.”
“Thank you, Professor!” Coomer was beaming at Bubby with a mischievous glint.
“Doctor.”
“Professor!”
Gordon couldn’t help but laugh as they continued the old argument. It was such a ridiculous thing, and he had heard it several times by this point, but it was familiar. He was laughing so much that he didn’t notice when Coomer had come over.
“Hello, Gordon! We should get moving! We still have to find a scientist who can let us out of this building.” The announcement was enough to jolt him out of his laughing fit, and he wiped his eyes before standing up and giving Coomer a wide, genuine smile.
The now familiar aches of his body were still there, but it was easier to ignore them with a lighter heart.
“Yeah, you’re right. Let’s go.”
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thankskenpenders · 5 years ago
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Yeah, this is the big one. Grab your popcorn
Sally finally gets a moment to talk to Sonic after being ignored all day, and tells him what’s up. With her being put in charge, and Sonic being her royal consort (basically, the guy who’s committed to marrying her someday but isn’t quite her fiance yet), Sally wants Sonic to stop going on away missions and lead Knothole by her side
Look. Let’s set aside all of our preconceived notions about what a Sonic comic should or shouldn’t be. Ignore the fact that we obviously want to see Sonic go on adventures. Forget it. Let’s look at it from Sally’s perspective for a second
Yes, this is the post in which I explain that “The Slap” isn’t that bad. It’s certainly not great, but it’s not The Worst Thing Ever like it’s been made out to be. I wish I didn’t have to spend my evening writing this, but 15 years of hyperbolic fan outrage (note: some Wikia rando added that “reception” section this year) have forced my hand
First of all, again, Sonic is formally committed to marrying her and ruling alongside her someday. This was established ten issues ago. He was already committed to this. Then, Sonic went and died. Sally still spent an entire year of her life thinking her basically-fiance was dead, and had to deal with shit in Knothole without him as things continued to get worse and worse. No one can just bounce back from that unscathed. After his return, she WANTED to help Sonic and go be a Freedom Fighter on the last mission, but her parents forbade her and the royal guards kept her in the castle. (That SUCKS, but is a whole ‘nother conversation.) She wants to fight by his side and keep him safe, but her parents are forcing her to stay home and be the princess, which only makes her more distraught. Last issue, she broke down into tears when she saw Sonic get shot by M over Eggman’s video feed, and her mother had to console her and reassure her Sonic wasn’t dead
Sally very clearly has PTSD over Sonic’s “death” a year ago. She doesn’t want to lose him again. She’s outright said as much
And also... when she says Sonic isn’t the only hero around, she’s got a point?Sonic barely did anything in the last arc! Tails was the one who outsmarted ADAM. Shadow dealt with Eggman. Bunnie did most of the damage to M and took out an entire fucking aircraft carrier on her own. Knuckles, the Chaotix, Rouge, and Amy took out the robot horde. All Sonic did was land the final attack on M--which, honestly, someone else could’ve done. And he got his arm injured in the process
Add on to this all of the chaos of the last few days. Sally’s barely had a free moment to see Sonic since she found out he was alive. They nearly got nuked by Eggman. They’re being harangued by the paparazzi. It sucks. And hell, it goes back WAY further than this! She spent years as a kid trying to save her parents, and now all they do is belittle her. She found out she had a secret older brother, and then her parents decided he was the more important child. She went through all sorts of relationship drama. She nearly died a few times herself. And now, her parents have decided to leave her in charge of their whole kingdom at a time of war, while she’s still a mess from the trauma of losing Sonic. The idea Bollers had was apparently that Sally had been bottling up her issues for years (which she totally had been), and this was just the breaking point
I know Sonic’s desire to keep being a hero is understandable. I know he’s right. That’s all he really knows how to do, and he feels useless in times of peace. And obviously, we the readers want to see Sonic go on adventures. But Sally’s concerns are valid. We don’t have to agree with her plan to have Sonic rule by her side for her emotions to be understandable
Sally’s been on the verge of a breakdown for who knows how long. She should be mad at her parents, but they’ve worn her down to the point where she thinks she’s unable to confront them. (It would be very, very easy to make a case arguing that Sally’s parents are emotionally abusive. Max especially.) She thinks that Sonic is the one person who will listen to her and have her back. They’re betrothed, after all. This is literally what he signed up for. After trying to get his attention ALL DAY, she finally gets a chance to talk to him. But he wants other things in life, and refuses. In front of a crowd, no less
So she lashes out at Sonic and slaps him
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Then they both start yelling at each other and crying. Sally asks Sonic if she’s more important to him than fighting Eggman, Sonic can’t answer, and Sally runs away in tears. For all intents and purposes, Sonic and Sally are now broken up. (For now.)
Should Sally be lashing out at Sonic? No. Could this scene be done better? Oh, absolutely. This is not the direction I would want Sally to go in as a character, and if you ARE gonna have them fight, this wasn’t written with the care required to make fans sympathize with both parties. The fact that we’ve seen everything from Sonic’s perspective with barely any insight into Sally’s certainly doesn’t help. But as the several lengthy paragraphs above explain, this does not come out of nowhere. It’s easy to find lots of fans online calling Sally all sorts of names (sometimes very misogynistic or ableist ones) because they think she just flipped out on Sonic out of nowhere. But she didn’t. Sally having some sort of breakdown had been foreshadowed for several issues, and the reasons why make sense. No, she shouldn’t have lashed out at Sonic, but this isn’t just her going “Oh no, my period! Let’s nuke England!” as so many have made it out to be. (And hell, the comics already had a lengthy history of treating Sally even worse than this, with Gallagher making her the nagging girlfriend who bickered with Sonic all the time and Penders sympathizing more with her shitty dad.)
Again, this was supposed to be a turning point in which Sally bottling up all this crap and carrying the weight of the world on her shoulders finally leads to her breaking. It’s a dramatic low point to build back up from. The problem is that Bollers left the series only a few issues later, and Penders and “Chacon” never did much with this. So in hindsight, many view this as her randomly snapping “for no reason,” because the followup stories that would have explored how she’d been bottling up her feelings were never actually written. But it’s not hard to figure out what’s supposed to be going on in her head if you actually go back and look at the preceding Sally scenes
For the most part, this is just run of the mill relationship drama for Archie Sonic. You see this kind of shit all the time in serialized media. Characters date, but the writers need to keep things ~spicy~, so they break up, see other people... then inevitably end up back together, and the process repeats ad nauseum. You ever watch Scrubs? You know how JD and Elliot are obviously love interests from episode one, but they had to do that will they/won’t they shit for years and have flings with other characters to keep up ratings? Yeah, it’s just that. For Sonic, there’s also the added pressure from Sega, who never allowed Sonic to be in any stable relationship for very long. Several writers have talked about how this limited what they could do with Sonic and Sally. Do I like that this cycle of drama is the norm? No. But after over 200 of these comics, I’m used to it
(And hell, at this point in the comics, they had literally just broken up Bunnie and Antoine, and Rouge was starting to get in the way of Knuckles and Julie-Su’s relationship. Between Julie-Su and Knuckles’ first kiss and them actually dating, Penders had Julie-Su get mad at Knuckles and go out with some random other guy. They do this shit all the time)
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The worst you can really say about this scene is that Jon’s art is a little too goofy and undermines the drama a bit. In his own words from his website’s FAQ: “I’m sorry. Like I said, I was an overeager noob and I drew what I was given.” But really, he had been drawing these sorts of exaggerated, frantic expressions throughout the entire issue. Not just with Sally. Look at all the panels of Sonic wigging out in the previous pages. I still think his work is fantastic. If anything, it was a bad call on Archie’s part to give this somber scene to a brand new artist with a very exaggerated, silly art style. He just drew what was in the script
You know what really blows about this whole thing, though? Jon Gray is still, to this day, over 15 years later, getting harassed for drawing The Slap
That is so utterly ridiculous and shitty. People have made up all sorts of conspiracy theories about the slap, saying that Jon had some sort of “anti-Sally agenda” and that it wasn’t in the script. (This is completely false.) People are so stuck in the past and bent out of shape over this one panel in a pretty run-of-the-mill Archie Sonic issue that Jon has to block people who come into his Twitter mentions accusing him of “sabotaging” the series on a regular basis. Y’all, Jon’s a good guy, and he doesn’t deserve to be treated like that
And lord. There’s so much nastier shit within this series. Penders hooking a 15-year-old Sally up with a dude in his 20s (and later saying that he wanted her to lose his virginity to said dude). Gallagher making Barby Koala have a creepy crush on Tails. Penders rephrasing a poem about the Holocaust to be about hedgehogs. Penders having Sally rationalize her dad’s attempt at genocide. (I could go on and on with Penders, can you tell)
This whole thing is just, so blown out of proportion. It’s not a great scene, but it didn’t “ruin” Sally’s character. Neither Jon nor Bollers had some sort of “anti-Sally agenda.” They weren’t out to ruin your fucking ship. And for god’s sake, quit yelling at them about it. This was 15 years ago and all parties involved have moved on. It’s just more melodrama in a series that’s always 90% melodrama
It’s a single panel in a comic about Sonic the Hedgehog. Can we move on
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desiraypark · 4 years ago
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When the Sun Sleeps in Canto Bight [9]
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Previous Entire Series
CHAPTER PLAYERS Kylo Ren Ruby Girard Solo Sanya Solo, Daughter of Kylo and Ruby (5) Ben “Little” Solo, Jr., Son of Kylo and Ruby (4) Aida Solo, Daughter of Kylo and Ruby (2) Leia Organa Solo, Kylo’s mother Sheev Palpatine, Leader of the Palpatine Gang Ap’lek, a Knight of Ren Cheap Restaurant Patron Girlfriend of the Cheap Restaurant Patron (imagine a Jean Harlow character) Flora Chauntaine, Evin’s Wife/Ruby’s Friend Threepio, Leia’s butler CHAPTER CONTENT Fluff; happy family; slight sexual reference; mild violence; disparaging comments.
The series now takes place in a setting that can be compared to a city in 1930s U.S.A. A depression is slightly referenced through consumers’ interest in music.
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Ruby intently watched her reflection as she put finishing touches on her makeup. A pink satin dress with long, ruffled sleeves adorned her curves. Her lips were still as she applied lipstick, but they twitched and formed into a smile when she heard the giggles of children. Kylo thumped into the bedroom like a fairytale giant. Sanya and Little clung to his legs like koala bears, and Aida sat on his shoulders. “Please, be careful,” Ruby urged. “Please, be careful,” Kylo mocked. “You all hear your Mama?”
The children giggled, and Ruby whirled around. “Oh, you all think that’s funny, huh?” Ruby asked. She grabbed Sanya and tickled her ribs, causing the little girl to break out into a fit of giggles. Ruby turned her attention to Little, and he left his father’s leg to run around the room--making his parents’ plush bed his destination. “Little, what did your mama say about gettin’ on that bed?” Kylo’s voice boomed. He pulled the two-year-old off his shoulders and held her in his arms, as Little quickly kicked his shoes off. Sanya took her shoes off and hopped on the bed, as well. But Little was letting his guard down. Ruby used the moment to attack--taking his little foot into her hand and tickling it. The boy fell back and filled the room with a pained laugh. Kylo watched the scene play out--looking Ruby over in the process. He bit his lip at the sight of her round ass in the form-fitting dress. “I’ve got a mind to shoot another baby in you with that dress on,” he said. Ruby’s eyes widened. “Kylo!” she said through clenched teeth. “They don’t know what I’m talking about,” he said back. He kissed Aida on the cheek and put her down on the bed. Then, he took a seat behind Ruby and kissed her neck. “What are you all going to do tonight?” Ruby asked, looking at the kids but talking to Kylo. “I know what we’re gonna do, but it’s a secret,” Kylo answered. Sanya jumped up. “Ooh, tell us, Papa, pleeeeeease!”  “It wouldn’t be a secret if I told you!” Kylo said, giving her nose a little tap with his index finger. ____________________ “Grandma, Grandma, Grandma!” Sanya and Little shouted through the large foyer of Leia’s home. The little lady with the coiffed updo flew out of the study.
“There are my grandbabies!” she said, her voice husky and strong. 
She bent down and pulled the two into her arms. Kylo followed behind, holding a duffel bag and carrying Aida in his free arm. Leia stood up and snatched the youngest right from Kylo’s arms. 
“There she goes with those chubby cheeks!” she said. Aida grabbed Leia’s lapel and mumbled and blubbered something nonsensible. Then, Leia gave her a peck on the cheek. “Kids, go into the kitchen. Threepio has a surprise for you.” “Oooh!” Sanya and Little said. They ran toward the kitchen. “Stop that running!” Kylo shouted at them. Leia’s shoulders lifted, frightened by her son’s stern voice. The children slowed their pace. “Stars, Ben. They’re alright!” Leia mumbled. Kylo wiped some drool from Aida’s mouth with his thumb. “Funny, when I was a kid, you’d have my head for running through the house.”
Leia rolled her eyes. “The past is the past.” “What kind of surprise does Threepio have?” Kylo asked. “Some fresh baked cookies,” Leia said, beaming.  “They can have two. I just took them for burgers and shakes, they’re never gonna go to fuc--go to bed.” Kylo handed the duffel bag off to Leia. “I should be back in about an hour. Two hours tops.” 
Leia stared at him in awe.
“Good evening, Mom,” she said to herself. “Good evening, Ben. How are you? Oh, I’ve been fine. That’s great. Business is good on this end. What about you?”
“Good evening, Mom. I’m glad business is good,” Kylo said. He bowed mockingly. “Business will be better for me when I make my way to it.”
He kissed Aida on the forehead and uncharacteristically kissed Leia. Both of them froze at the display of affection but said nothing of it. Kylo swallowed and turned on his heels. “Thanks, Mom. Shouldn’t take more than an hour,” he said, rushing for the door. ____________________  
“Now, your mom, on the other hand--I have a great deal of respect for her. A lot of people folded--giving up their businesses for pennies. But your mother’s got that Organa blood in her. If you ask me, the Organas are a gang all on their own.” Kylo chuckled. “I’d have to agree with you on that.” Sheev Palpatine took puffs of his cigar on the other side of Kylo’s desk. “I don’t like to force people to fall in line with me. You make the offer appealing, they’ll fall soon enough. Especially when they’re in need.” Kylo nodded. “And the Organas have never been in need.” “Precisely.” Suddenly, there was a knock at the door. “Come in.” Ap’lek opened the door. “Boss, there’s a customer who wants to meet the manager.” “For what?” Kylo asked, annoyed. “Didn’t like his food.” “Fuckin’ hell…” Kylo mumbled. “I think he’s just lookin’ for trouble, Boss…” Kylo rose from his seat. “I should be heading home, anyway,” Sheev said, also rising. “Thank you for meeting me on such short notice. Don’t forget--Trudgen and Cardo only. Through the flower shop, into the alley, and behind the bakery.”
“I won’t forget,” Kylo said. “Let me walk you out.”
Kylo and Sheev walked behind Ap’lek and into the recently upgraded dining area of The Garden Lounge. 
“I’ll be over in a minute,” he told Ap’lek. 
His eyes fell on a couple. The man looked to be his father’s age and of course, the woman he was dining with was young enough to be his daughter. She had platinum blonde hair in Marcel waves, was covered in diamonds, and wore a mink stole over her white satin dress. The man sat at the table with his arms folded. Kylo escorted Sheev to his car. Before Sheev climbed in, he held a finger up.
“Oh, by the way. Requests for Ruby’s records are going up,” he said.
“Are they now?” Kylo asked, a small smile forming on his face.
“Didn’t I tell you? You make something appealing enough--people will want it. If everyone thinks she’s tops, they’ll want to be associated with her,” Sheev said. He sat in his car, but Kylo held the door. “Now, wait, Sheev. You’re talkin’ like Ruby has no talent,” he said. “Like you’ve gotta force her on people.” “Oh, no, she is, talented Kylo. No mistake about it. But it’s like I told you before, her voice is too raw. Too powerful. People have been wanting music they can sip champagne and dance to--not drink whiskey and cry to.” Sheev started his engine. 
“But, with the way things are going now, I think people may be coming around. We’ll see.”
Sheev closed his door and waved goodbye to Kylo. Then, Kylo went back into the lounge and stopped at the troublesome table. The woman’s plate was empty, and her face was reddish--her lips pursed. The man’s plate was almost empty--some beef left on the bone; a corner of mashed potatoes left. “What’s the problem?” The man held up his check. “I just don’t think this was worth what I paid, buddy.” The blonde rolled her eyes. “But you ate the whole damn thing,” Kylo said. “Don’t get me wrong, it was okay, but it wasn’t worth this amount. I’d like a senior’s discount or something.” Kylo stared at the man, mulling over how to handle this. He looked at the plate again, then back into the man’s eyes. Then, he looked at the woman’s plate, and into her sapphire blues. 
“Did you enjoy your meal, ma’am?”
“I--” 
“It’s not about whether we enjoyed it or not,” the man said. He pointed at his date. “She could have made this for me herself for cheaper. This didn’t blow me away, at all.”
Kylo knocked the man’s plate into his lap. “Well, get her to make something for you next time.”
“Now, wait a minute!” the man shouted. He jumped up from his seat, but Kylo slapped him across the face, sending him back down on his butt. 
“Pay this ticket and get the fuck out,” Kylo said. He glanced at the woman, who was smirking. 
“I hope you find some more enjoyable company this evening, Miss.”
“As do I!” she agreed. Kylo walked back toward his office. 
“You’re always fuckin’ embarrassing me!” he heard the woman screeched.
Ap’lek watched the man pay the bill, then walked into the office, shaking his head.
“The things men do to impress new pussy,” Ap’lek said. 
“Do you got a pair of balls in your fuckin’ underwear, Ap’lek?” Kylo asked, lighting a cigarette. 
“Yeah, Boss,” Ap’lek answered, releasing air from his nostrils. “Why do you ask?”
“Don’t come in here like a little bitch askin’ me to take care of some fuckin’ table. Especially with Palpatine here. He already thinks you guys are fuckin’ useless.” Kylo blew a puff of smoke into the air. “My kids know how to handle a fuckin’ conflict with more fuckin’ brass than you. Get a fuckin’ grip.”
“Sorry, Boss,” Ap’lek said. He tipped his head in reverence. “I just didn’t want to create any trouble.”
“That fuckin’ prune wasn’t gonna be no trouble. He just wanted to get out of payin’ a bill. Use your fuckin’ common sense.”
“Yes, Boss.” “I’m gonna look over a few books, then I’m gettin’ the fuck outta here,” Kylo said, opening his desk drawer. “Yes, Sir...”
____________________
“It’s a shame you couldn’t stay for the after-party, Ruby,” Flora said. She stopped her car in front of the Ren house. 
“I know. I just miss my babies so much,” Ruby said. She looked up at the darkened house. “They’re all probably knocked out.”
Flora chuckled. “I’m sure my kiddos are, too.”
“I miss having you around, Ruby. All of that testosterone gets to be too much.” Ruby laughed.
“You know you don’t have to go to every engagement, Flo,” Ruby suggested in a sing-songy voice.
“Oh, you’re crazy!” 
Ruby threw her head back and let out another laugh. “You don’t trust Evin after all of these years?”
“Oh, I trust Evin. I don’t trust the boys. Or the chicks at the clubs. The only reason I drove you home is because I miss talking to you alone.”
Ruby rolled her eyes and smiled. “I think you should trust your husband, Flo. He loves you and wouldn’t dream of stepping out on you.”
“Yeah, sure, sure…” Flora said. She hugged Ruby. “Come record with us again,” she said, pulling away.
“I’ll try. I’m just so tied up with Sidious Records. I can’t record with anyone else right now.”
“How much longer are you contracted with them?”
“Two more years. Or until my records start to tank,” Ruby answered.
“Well, from the sounds of it, that’s gonna be a long time. Your records are always on the radio,” Flora said. Ruby smiled. 
“Yeah, it is nice to hear myself,” Ruby said, warmth befalling her. “Thanks for dropping me off. Get back to the club.” 
Ruby gave Flora one more hug before stepping out of the car and into the house. It was pitch black and eerily quiet. She walked up the stairs and peeked into the bedrooms. No Kylo, no kids. Ruby went back downstairs and grabbed the phone.
“CB West Information...” the switchboard operator said. 
“Hello, I’d like to be connected with PAR-1956.” “One moment, please.” Ruby fiddled with the phone cord. “This is Leia Organa’s residence, may I ask who is speaking?” “Hi, Threepio! This Ruby. Is Kylo there?” Ruby asked. “Good evening, Mrs. Ruby. No, he isn’t, but the children are. He dropped them off to attend an emergency meeting.”  “He did?”
“Yes, ma’am. Would you like them brought to you?” he asked.
“Um…” Ruby thought about it. “No, I’ll come to get them myself. I’ll be over soon.”
TAG LIST @aloneandsleepless​
@tsarinastorm​
@sister-winter73​
@clydes-hole​
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juleswolverton-hyde · 5 years ago
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The Sword and Shield (BC x Reader)
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Genre: Fluff, Idol AU, Quarantine fiction
Pairing: Bangchan x Reader
Warnings: Innuendos, nerdy Pokémon talk.
Summary: Every warrior needs a sword and shield to defend themselves against enemies. However, two nerds take up weapons in a vastly different fight. 
Masterlist
Credits for the banner art go to Satzzz Art.
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Life between the sheets does not always have to be characterized by Sensuality because there is more to be found among the pillows and blankets. It is amiable comfort, dozing off together to the sunrays streaming in through the light bedroom curtains or listening to music while sharing earbuds to kill the boredom of quarantine by means of occupying oneself with whatever is at hand. After all, it is yet unknown for how long the global population is forbidden to leave their homes safe for retrieving necessities at the supermarket or drugstore.
A blessing in disguise, however, is being able to spend the period of restriction with a bunch of lively lads which includes the lover of little more than a year. The moment it became known countries were hauling in their own residents a foolhardy decision was made to remain in South-Korea and leave the life in the place of origin behind for a while. The choice did not sit well with Chan at first, not too subtly asking to reconsider it though soon finding a secret delight in finally being able to wake up every day in the same bed.
No thousands of kilometres distance.
No time to be taken away by management and time zone differences.
The pandemic has at least given us this.
A taste of life as a real couple.
 Just before IKEA closed as well, the lovable human kangaroo insisted on going there for the last shopping spree so personal taste could be added to the bedroom that would be shared. The well-meant idea was rejected at first, saying it was not needed and that the interior was fine as it was. However, once bleached locks have set their mind to something, it is barely possible to change the focus of determination and thus the private shared space has been decorated with a few candles alongside a new bookcase to house whichever books were already taken from home as well as a few pieces of art and a collection of postcards that have been pinned on a metal grate.
Our perfect little nest.
A haven of comfort for songs and nerdy thoughts.
‘Hey, babygirl.’ The mattress dips as the human koala joins the small kingdom in the sheets of sweatpants and loose tops that are somehow still deemed charming. Even the surface beneath the minimal layer of makeup is apparently preferred by the strong arm wrapping around the waist as platinum locks rest on the head and watch the screen held between hands. ‘What’re you playing?’
‘Pokémon Sword. It’s really good thus far and- Oh my god, it’s so cute!’ In an instance, the screen is lifted to show the six adorable balls clad in armor, a new creature which is called a Falinks. ‘Look at these little buddies!’
A wide smile breaks out on plush lips, wavy locks shaking in closed-eyed amusement before looking up again with the wonder of a new discovery. ‘So that’s why you’ve been kicking the air or screaming something is cute. I didn’t know you were a Pokémon fan?’
‘I have been since I was little, but it’s not something I tell others about.’ The true meaning of the grin no longer passes under the radar, igniting an ember of shame for harbouring a geeky side when it comes to the Japanese creatures. ‘Yes, I know, I am a mega nerd. Bite me.’
The jaw clenched in timidity relaxes when slender fingers tickle the sides as a big nose presses into the side of the neck to nuzzle it. The comment was not meant to provoke although the lowered voice suggests otherwise as it speaks against skin, teeth even cheekily nibbling. ‘Watch your words, Y/N, or I just might.’
However, the sensuous attitude fades as fast as it appeared as irises the colour of pure chocolate wander back to the device. ‘Can I see your Pokémon?’
Because the girl in the sheets is not the only trainer beneath the roof. 
‘Sure.’ With the same nonchalance that denies the suggestiveness from a second ago, the index of the creatures which are currently being trained is opened. The current team consists of a Corviknight, Obstagoon, Thievul, Drapion, Boltund and Cinderace. ‘I’m currently training these though I mostly specialize in Dark Types.’
‘Why doesn’t that surprise me?’ To get more comfortable, Chan slouches further down the bed to rest more properly on a beloved narrow shoulder. Nevertheless, the all-knowing grin from before remains plastered onto plush lips. ‘I suppose you’re also interested in training Ghost and Psychic types as well?’
‘I’m an open book, aren’t I?’
‘Just a little bit.’ The teasing is made up for with a chaste peck on the nose followed by one on the forehead. Just the way it is preferred and done whenever apologizing for something or to simply gain a smile. Withal, now, judging by the twinkle in mischievous eyes, it is definitely to say sorry in advance for what is to come. ‘Can you guess what my type is?’
‘Me?’
The witty response evokes the bubbly boyish laughter that has been loved ever since the first time it was heard. ‘You’re not wrong.’
‘Okay, okay, let me think.’ The scanning for clues on the face results in nothing except a brighter devilish glimmer in a loving look. Henceforth, the answer will have to based on personality and all the little things that have been discovered since being in a relationship and now prematurely living together. ‘Electric? Although, no, wait. Fire. Something tells me you at least have a Growlith or had but it has transformed into Arcanine. Then again, judging by that splendid performance of the theme song in your VLive, I’d also wager you have a Pikachu. However, you’re very sporty so maybe you specialize in Fighting types?’
‘You’re on the right track. The answer is somewhere in there.’ Instead of one mocking eyebrow, two rise in a failed attempt to exaggerate coyness while looking cool. ‘Or is it?’
‘Very helpful, Chris.’ Sarcastically disregarding the useless remark and lopsided smirk, the former ramble is composed into a somewhat solid answer. Anywhere close to the truth is better than nothing. ‘You’re a Fire trainer who is also interested in Fighting types.’
‘Almost. I’m a Dragon trainer who always starts out as a Fire trainer. I am, however, also interested in Fighting types too. I do have an Arcanine and Pikachu is an exception to the rule because it’s Pikachu. Every trainer should have one.’
‘I have one too, but it doesn’t have a name since it’s a female and I only name my male Pokémon.’
Focus shifts back to the screen, Chan reading the names of the amiable creatures that form the company on the journey to becoming the best. It started as a fun idea and the names matched fairly well. ‘So I’ve noticed. Are you associating everyone in the industry with a Pokémon?’
But nothing ever runs smoothly. 
‘I’m trying, but it’s bloody hard at times. I made Jackson a Pidove. Don’t laugh! I don’t know why I did it, but his name was the first to pop up when I caught it. Baekhyun is an Applin. Wait, he’s transformed already so now he’s a Flapple. Han is a Greedent because, let’s be honest, he’s a squirrel. Changbin, well, Bin is a Corviknight. I gave his full name to a Rufflet. Minho is a Sneasel, Felix a Thievul and I have yet to decide on the rest of the boys.’
‘Which one would be me?’ Judging by the suggestive tone of curious eyes and barely noticeable pout, there is the clear hope of a comparison with an awesome creature. The tightened grip on the hips betrays it too, blatantly so. Almost forcing the unknown comparison to one’s personal preference. 
‘Without a doubt, you are Zacian, the giant warrior wolf with a sword in its mouth.’ A deep sigh cannot be helped at the thought of the game’s challenge which does absolutely not allow for failure. ‘The legendary Pokémon of the Galar region. Dammit, Channie! Why do you have to be so elusive and exclusive?’
‘Because I’m an amazing catch.’ The cheek is turned by slender fingers, compelling lips to join in a playful giggly kiss which is broken up by a smug remark. ‘And warriors are not so easily bound to a master. You told me even Beowulf reluctantly helped a king, only to settle his father’s debt. 
‘Although,’ the train of thought is easily altered by hooking a digit under the silver necklace that was given as a birthday present, pulling the tease in yet holding off from melting into another kiss by backing away to continue the battle of wits and enjoy the small adorable whine of disagreement, ‘with the right trainer, I suppose I could make a deal.’
��I plan on winning all gym badges and make myself worthy of the wolf.’
‘You will still have to win in that final fight. Until then, think you can take me on?’ Brows furrow in a suddenly hard-fought battle for concentrated control. Funnily contradicting oneself, the domestic koala shifts positions to hover over the coy soul who was able to tame the beast beneath the roof, faces inches apart and the Switch tucked in the small space between bodies.  
Which becomes noticeably narrower when transforming Innocence into Sensuality by creating the image of what might be given after testing out the waters of victory and win in a Pokémon battle. ‘I have more than enough times in this bed.’
To make up for the victory and erase any negative unspoken feelings. 
Though the soft growling suggests impatience, unwilling to be kept on a leash any longer. ‘Don’t change the subject. You’re fighting unfairly.’
‘Am I?’ The device is put aside on the bedside table, ankles hooking behind the waist to coax a hard shape into the warmth between the thighs as hands rest on broad shoulders. A much-appreciated action evidently, breath taken away by the friction between two concealed forms of wanting and nails digging into the skin beneath the comfy black printed fleece vest.
And the chest now making escape entirely impossible, hearts racing in harmony. ‘Yes. You’re distracting me.’
‘Says the person who’s distracting me from gaining those badges.’ Enough coherency lingers to remain cheeky. Bashful enough to lean in and utter a final double-sided statement of defiance. ‘I bet I can easily best you.’
But two can play that game, apparently. 
‘I think you’re wrong, babygirl. Or do I need to remind you of how good I am?’
‘Grab your Switch and bring it on.’ The challenge is accepted with a scoff which clearly started having different expectations in regards to the order of events. Fortunately, a sweet quick peck cures most of the shallow grumpiness as Chris is dismissed from the sheets. ‘And give me all you’ve got.’
‘Oh, I will. I always do.’
As became apparent in the few battles between teams.
The wolfish actions that followed unspoken hard feelings unhappy with the outcomes of the fights.
And a broken headboard in the morning.
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touchmycoat · 5 years ago
Note
hey~ Ask and I will always be willing to send you a prompt XD But how about SaboAce with “You fainted…straight into my arms. You know, if you wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”
thank you thank you thank you
from the Pirates of the Caribbean AU. SaboAce, rated T for gratuitous swearing and violence.
((send me a ship and a number and i’ll write you a drabble))
This was shaping up to be, by far, the worst party of Sabo’s entirelife.
“Fuck.” He’dlost his sword in the fight with the big masked bastard. Not that theguy got the upper hand on him or anything. It had been pure luck—agust of wind and a speck of dust well-landed, Sabo cringing andgetting the sword smacked out of his grip, the door slamming shutjust before Sabo could reach through and grab hold of his weapon oncemore.
(Sabo probablycould’ve made it with a bruised wrist, had it not been the wristthat wore Ace’s compass; a hundred masked bastards could stab Sabothrough the chest and still Sabo wouldn’t risk damage coming tothat compass.)
So there he was,sprinting through the back gardens that were not open to the guestsyet, a cackling madman chasing after him keen on murder. There weredetours Sabo could’ve taken, subpar swords not of his own making hecould’ve yanked out from the sets of armor lining the inner castlewalls, but he had a timetableto keep, dammit. There was a Single Super Important Don’t You DareBe Late Sabo key in his possession and Koala was waiting; he didn’thave the time to properly fight and dispose of his assailant.
“Doublefuck,” Sabo spat, because of course the southeast servant’sentrance was locked. He and Koala had calculated roughly a 20% chanceof this happening on the night of the revolution and had came up withcontingencies, but neither of them had calculated for the actualbloodthirsty pirate on Sabo’s tail.
“Listen,I don’t even know who you are,” the masked man cackled as Saboveered off into an alley that, likely, both of them knew was a deadend. “All I know is that it’ll be awful fun to kill you.”
Brightbrass music was playing from inside the main building, and Sabowasn’t even wearing his nice cravat. Triple fuck.
Buta dead end was a dead end, so Sabo had no other choice but to shimmyhis way up the nearest tree as stealthily as possible and vault hisway through the nearest window.
...Onlyto slam face-first into Ace’s chest. Ace stumbled back with an oof,but caught Sabo by the shoulders before either of them had to hit theground.
“Welllook who it is,” Ace laughed. Sabo forced himself to peel his faceoff the front of Ace’s regal coat, sure that the shiny gold buttonshad left unsavory indents along his cheek. “Where’d you comefrom?”
“Thetree,” Sabo answered immediately, gesturing with his thumb at thewindow. Faintly, he could hear the lumbering steps of the murderouspirate-creep-shitstain traversing the grounds outside. Quadrupleinfinity fuck. “I um, fainted.”
“You…fainted. Straight into my arms.” See Sabo would’ve been justfine, had the Duke of Baterilla been just a nice guy with solidpolitics and economic policies that actually supported the peasantry.He would’ve been just fine, had Ace just been cheery and supportiveof Sabo’s little blacksmithing gig. But no, Ace had to be fuckingbeautiful as well,with all that sun-blessed brown skin and eyes that lit up withdelightedirony at all of Sabo’s jokes and in moments like this. Sabocouldn’t afford to be compromised right now, dammit—but it’snot like he could do anything but be helplessly slack in Ace’s arms(absurdly buff for a theoretically useless member of the gentry) asAce grinned.
“Ifyou wanted my attention you didn’t have to go to such extremes.”
Sabowanted to swoon. Sabo wanted to laugh hysterically. Oh he’d showAce extremes, whetheror not he actually wanted to. There was a key in Sabo’s pocket anda murderer right outside the window; shit was about to hit the fanand here he was making moon eyes and being perfectly useless at Ace—
“YourGrace.” A light frown line appeared on Ace’s brow at the title,but he allowed Sabo to guide him by the elbow down the hall, awayfrom the window-slash-ticking time bomb. “Listen, you… You toldme once that you consider me a friend. Is that true?”
NowAce pulled away, looking fully offended.
“Ofcourse it is. The only thing in question has only ever been whetheror not you consider mea friend.” And how it hurt to hear Ace snap at him like this, butSabo knew he fully deserved it. This wasn’t even the worse thingthat was about to take place at this party tonight. Far from it.“I’ve asked you time and time again to call me by my na—”
“Sabo.”
Koala.Mothershitting fuck lord—
Sabowheeled around just in time to catch the musket Koala flung his way.She’d shed her maid’soutfit, now that the infiltration has begun. Stompingforward, Koala barely paused at the sight of Ace. Shejust thrust her hand out and waited for the key.
“Wegot word of a pirate invasion from—”
“Thesouthern docks, I know,” Sabo finished. Before Koala’s eyes couldnarrow, there was the loudsound cracking wood, like a door being smashed open from the outside.People were screaming.
“That’snot one of ours,” Koala declared, probably actually for Ace’sbenefit.
“Iknow. A pirate followed me here.”
Itwas truly amazing how witha single paused breath and aspecifically paced blink, Koala could convey awhole nuanced sentiment: this is so not the time or placebut be sure I’m gonna get on your ass about how you managed to makesuch a foolish mistake on one of the most important nights of ourjoint careers. Koalatook her key, shot one more glance at Ace, then started jogging away.
“We’restill on track for the time table Sabo,” was her parting warning.“You know what’s atstake.”
Really—morethan anything, Sabo knew the stakes. Couldfeel the stakes, a pair of betrayed eyes stabbing into his back.
Aceslapped his outstretched hand away.
“Sabowhat the fuck.”
Whatwas more than the already-existing infinity of fucks? Sabotook a deep breath.
“I’ma Revolutionary.”
“Yeah,”Ace scoffed, sounding much more hurt about being deceived thanderisive. “I kind of pieced that together. Alsokind of pieced together that the coup is tonight—as in, rightnow. Gonnastring me up and out Sabo? Makean example of me and my family for your Revolution?”
Witha wince, Sabo took a step back from the wrists Ace thrust out at him,daring him to bondage.
“Youagreed with me,” Sabo said warily. “Inever hid my politics from you Ace, andevery time we talked—”
“Thisisn’t about your politicsSabo, it’s the fact thatyou lied to me—”
“Aha,there he is, the little blue boy!”
Themasked pirate back again. Except this time, Sabo had a musket and Aceto watch out for. He didn’t even bother letting the manapproach—just shouldered his way in front of Ace, cocked the gun,and shot the pirate dead.
Acehad one hand clawing hard into Sabo’s shoulder, and even then Sabowas grateful for that reengaged point of contact.
“—whenI’ve expressly asked, and then vouchedfor you when you said you weren’t doing anything sketchy!” Acefinished, like the little interlude with the gun and the murder neverhappened. Sabo had to givehim credit—whatever peopleliked to say about faint-hearted and useless royals, Ace was notthat. In fact, Ace wasstrong, and Sabo wassure there would be a bruise on his arm tomorrow.
Downstairsin the main hall, the musicpetered off to an ungraceful stop. There wasn’t any screaming,which probably meant it was Dragon’sdoing, not the pirates. Good.That meant Sabo could stillafford the time to explain.
“You’reright.” Lowering the gun, Sabo turned and let himself standchest-to-chest with Ace. Hewas just the bit taller like this, and tookquiet, fond pleasure at the pinking of Ace’sears when Ace realized. “Ilied, and I’m sorry, I really am. ButI swear I was going to tell you tonight.”
“Beforeor after you overthrew me and my family?”
It’s not evenabout you, Sabo wanted toprotest, but that was more ofa we-have-an-entire-afternoon-to-debate-this sort of argument, not athere-are-two-separate-attacks-being-mounted-against-you-and-your-guests-so-can-we-please-move-along-already-no-matter-how-much-you-hate-me-I-need-to-get-you-to-safetysort. So Sabo didn’t say it. Instead,he forced himself to stand still and keep his expression open,letting Ace see all the barrel-bottomhonesty Sabo was still capable of.
Ace’s fingers grazed the compass still strapped to Sabo’s wrist, and his glare began to falter.
“Ace,”Sabo said, dropping his voice low, “look—”
“Ooh,that smarts. You little bitch.”
Aceand Sabo’s head snapped toward the corpse—or, what should’vebeen a corpse—in twin,dread-filled tandem as themasked pirate sat up. Bullets, bentand blood-stained, scattered to the floor.
“Seenow I’m gonna kill your little friend too,” the piratecackled, fully and impossibly alive despite his centerof mass riddled with bullet holes.
Downstairsand not-so-distantly, the partygoers began to scream.
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nexstage · 5 years ago
Text
LIMBO SILVAM - PART 9 (1/3)
It was the void again, but this time it felt different. Like something was missing. Though, of course, something was because the light, the sound, air, and other elements were nonexistent; still, there was an emptiness that couldn't leave them alone no matter how hard they tried to ignore it.
 "Lapis?" Someone was calling her name "Lapis, wake up!" Why they sounded so distraught? "Lapis, please! Wake up! Don't leave me!" Wait, that voice...
 "Peri...? Peridot?" Her eyes opened slowly and she spot the tear-stained gaze of her love, her eyebrows furrowed and the whole body was trembling.
 "Thank stars you're awake!" Peridot's arms wrapped on her neck, she could hear some sniffs and feel the wetness of her tears.
 "Hey, Peri. Hey, it's ok, I'm not going anywhere" a blue hand caressed the yellow, triangular-shaped hair to comfort her. Her cerulean eyes wandered to every corner of whatever they were, but the problem was that only black surrounded them. Utter black and silence.
 If it weren't for Peridot's presence and voice, she would go crazy in that desolated dimension.
 "--rry" Peri's voice was a pitiful whisper, but she could hear a bit of what she said, and Lapis didn't like it.
 "Say it again" Lapis grabbed both her companion's shoulders and looked at her seriously "Say it and then tell me if you would've liked to see me acting this way"
 Peridot, despite her tears and self-hatred blinding her judgment, understood what Lapis meant. She knew, from many conversations both had before this mess, that the blue gem tended to fall to a depressive hole, believing everyone was better off without her, that her mistakes and past wrongs made her look like poison instead of a flawed person. But it wasn't true. Lapis WAS flawed, like Peridot, Steven, and the rest of her friends. Good and bad traits together which made them unique. Still...
 "Laz, this is different. I should've protected you better, I should've done more, I shouldn’t have gotten us lost when the plan was reaching the light at the peak! I... I ruined it all... How can you be so forgiving with me?"
 "Because it's not your fault" Peridot was going to protest but Lapis stopped her "No, I'm serious. Peri, even if our places had been inversed back then, things would have still been out of control. The shadows, the monster, the storm, our bodies deteriorating. We would've ended up the same"
 "Are you really trying to make me feel better? Because it's not working" the blue gem smiled at her bitter and angst-ridden love to whom she hugged tightly. Peridot melted at the touch and clung like a baby koala, calming down a bit.
 "I'm still sorry, Laz" the technician said morosely "We're dead because of me"
 Lapis didn't know what to say at that. They were surrounded by darkness, yes, but it didn't feel like death, not yet. Should she tell her that maybe they were in a sort of coma? Would that change something?
 "I was in this kind of darkness too" Lazuli decided to approach it slowly "Maybe we are in the same condition I was. Maybe what we need is to find a way to wake up"
 "But how? Back then, I was the one finding you unconscious and even I thought you'd never get out of it, but now we don't have anyone to find and protect us from those monsters"
 "Come on" slender, blue fingers caressed a wet cheek "Since when the powerful and lovable Peridot gives up? What happened with 'I think we can win. I think you can win'?"
 "It was slapped by reality, Lapis. That's what happened. Reality and being rubbed in your face that without powers there's no point in trying. Besides, why are you so encouraging? As far as I know, we might be dead already and this is how the Afterlife looks like"
 "Because certain cute and brave gem has shown me all this time that trying new things may seem scary, but it is worth it in the end" Peridot didn't respond but the frown of her face told Lapis that the little gem didn't agree at all.
 What were they going to do now? There were no options but to wait for a miracle and even that was useless because they were stuck in the middle of nothing, in a black dimension or whatever part of the Afterlife. What about their friends, their family, their lives in Little Homeworld? All gone.
 Lapis could feel the helplessness and self-loathing emanating from Peridot. She was pretty familiar with those feelings, though it was better if she felt them than her crush. Being so distraught by your self-hatred because of some mistakes or what fate had in store for you wasn't a good experience. It was something Lazuli could relate to with Peri, but she'd rather see her smiling and not giving up than this.
 She truly wanted for the mechanic to keep trying, to think on a plan or at least give a last chance to go home, but come to think of it, Lazuli considered it a bit selfish to push encouragement and comprehension to her comrade who was emotionally drained and needed a break of more planning that might go wrong. What Peri required more than anything was a silent company to ground her.
 Slowly, she approached and put her on her lap, hugging Peridot from behind while placing her chin on her yellow, triangular hair. The other protested a bit, not in the mood for some temporary comfort but the green gem was too tired to do something and groaned miserably.
 A long stretch of silence passed, both Crystal Gems submerged in their own thoughts, while nothingness and darkness remained the same. There was no up nor down, no light nor limits, nor sign of life or danger. 'This is how a sad ending must feel like' Peridot mused numbly 'A huge well where you can do whatever you want which ironically won't give you any satisfaction or change the outcome, just a temporary distraction that will leave you emptier than before while living with the fact that you didn't do enough. Just hopelessness and failure in front of you'
 Yeeesh, she was getting the depressing vibes that Lapis used to have, wasn't she? Though, with their situation being shitty as it was, using her big brain was a waste of time. But no, she doubted time was even allowed to exist in this sad void.
 'I can do whatever I want' Peri remembered suddenly from her last musings and an unexpected idea crossed her mind 'I can ask Lapis if she--' she shook her head trying to dismiss it. There was no way Laz would accept that, besides, even if she said yes, if they remained powerless, then it would be a wasted chance. And she wanted to do it in their home, not in an entirely black and silent dimension.
 'I can't put her through that' Peri reflected sadly 'Even if she trusts me, it will be asking too much from her, and because of me she's stuck here'
 "What are you thinking about, Dot?" Lapis' tender voice got her out of her internal debates, then the little gem stiffened with the idea of telling her companion the truth. "Is something wrong?" the blue gem placed her hand on a green chin so both could see each other. Peridot gulped, her mind and heart fighting for dominance about what to do: not saying anything or being honest.
 "Uuummmm... I don't know how to say this" she started and prayed internally to not screw this up too "I was... Well... You know, we don't have any idea of how to get out of this place, whatever it is, so... If for some reason we are going to be trapped here forever, maybe we should...try...something... You know, to pass the time... And I..." some tears of frustration gathered in the corner of her eyes and she rubbed them furiously "Forget it, it was stupid anyway"
 "No, it wasn't. Whatever it is, you can tell me" Lapis smiled at her kindly, Peridot debating with herself if there was a point to try "Come on, Dot. What is it?"
 "It's just a meaningless whim, that's all. Why should we embark on something like that? I mean, didn't you want to go home? Why haven't you told me to think on a new plan, encourage me or knock some sense into me? Why are you acting so calm instead of freaking out?"
 "I could lash out, blaming me or you, lose hope or keep trying on my own, but it wouldn't be fair to you. You are exhausted, frustrated, angry, confused. I know how that feels, so I decided to just be at your side in silence instead of overwhelming you"
 "Oh... Well, t-thanks, though it's not that I'm the only one with plans, yours was great too but... Anyway, don't you miss home?" Lapis hugged lovingly and in her subconscious, Peridot could understand what she was trying to say 'You're my home'. "You are too" the green gem mumbled while sniffing.
 "Laz, how do you think Steven and the others will find us? Will we be found poofed, cracked, both of them, maybe our bodies under layers and layers of snow, or...or shattered?"
 "Are you asking this in the slightest hope to not be in darkness anymore?" Peridot didn't say anything for some minutes until she nodded to which Lapis said "They will. Even if it takes them too much, they will. I mean, if they get stuck, Garnet will guide them. She has future vision, after all"
 "I wish I had that. That way we wouldn't be trapped here. But, even if they find us, what are the chances of wakening up? Maybe this is our new eternity now. No home, no friends, no meep morps. Just a big and round zero"
 Lapis was lost on what to do to help with her love's distress. The more they talked about the next course of action -if there was any-, the more somber was Peri's mood which broke her heart. Then she remembered something and hoped it didn't trigger another dark emotion on the little gem, "You know, I was imagining us visiting Pumpkin's tomb once we returned home. It was so difficult for both of us when she died"
 "I wish she was here too, Laz. I'd like to visit her with you" the blue gem caressed her cheek smoothly, Peridot leaning on the touch, before saying something else "I also wanted to cuddle with you in my hammock. Rest for a bit, relax, just the two of us"
 "I wish we were at home right now. I wanted so much to fuse with you" the little gem kept enjoying the caress on her cheek until she heard a gasp and saw Lapis' surprised eyes. Immediately, she covered her mouth with both hands, cursing herself mentally for having let out that without thinking.
 Lazuli was completely stiffened, barely processing what she'd heard while looking at Peridot as if she was seeing someone else. Wrong. Wrong, wrong, wrong! This was all wrong! She shouldn’t have said that! She should've kept her mouth shut! This was a bad idea!
 "I-I-I-I-I... Sorry!" Peridot ran while holding back tears. She glanced a still stunned Lapis for the last time before getting lost in the never-ending darkness.
 --------------------
 The blue Crystal Gem was a mess. No, her mind was the one being a mess, exactly. Confusion and dark memories she thought she had overcome time ago were getting the best of her as her whole body tensed when she remembered Peridot's words: I wanted so much to fuse with you.
 Peri wanted to fuse. Peri wanted to and had chosen her, Lapis Lazuli, to do that. She had hopes of returning home with her and then ask her if the blue gem wanted to fuse with her. And, by some twist of fate or accident, Peridot had confessed it and now she was gone.
 What was Lapis supposed to do with that information? Before the Gem War, fusion never crossed her mind, not only because of Homeworld laws but also for being unnecessary for her. Then, after being dragged to Earth by Jasper and Peridot, it became her worst misdeed along with her most savages urges of revenge when she unleashed all her anger and hatred on Jasper once they fused into Malachite.
 She hated it. She was disgusted by it as much as she was disgusted with herself. Jasper's cold words rang in her mind, reminding her why: You can't lie to me. I've seen what you're capable of. I thought I was a brute, but you, you're a monster.
 Lapis wasn't a warrior gem; however, she was powerful. She could steel the ocean and fight the Crystal Gems while her gem was cracked. She could take control of Malachite and hold both Jasper and herself prisoners in the ocean. She even sent her flying with a single water punch. She had so much power and ammo, and that was the problem.
 No, the problem was that Lapis was too violent. So much rage, hatred, and pain for being a prisoner 6000 thousand years pushed her to do the worst to someone she despised. But Peri, though, she wasn't Jasper nor she had any intention to force her to fuse. It was only a wish of hers. But Peri might get hurt, just like Jasper or worse. She might see how dangerous Lapis was and hate her. Fear her.
 The blue gem would rather die than risk her relationship with her companion just because of a wish, even if it was Peridot's. Guilt hit her hard for thinking that way. She was being selfish again. Peri had done so much for her, the least she could do was to give her what she wanted, but Lapis couldn't stand the fact of seeing someone so precious to her getting hurt if they fuse.
 What was she going to do? If she said she didn't want to fuse, Peridot would be sad and disappointed. And if Lapis said yes, there was a huge chance she might screw up and hurt Peri. She would never forgive herself if that happened.
 'Battling the Diamonds sounds easier now' Lapis lamented and covered her face, trying to think on a way to solve this problem. 'And back then, I felt safe because I knew Peri was there and we were facing them together'. Then it hit her. Of course! Why she didn't think about it? She just had to talk to her. Though it would be more difficult than when she apologized for abandoning the little gem.
 Whatever, the blue gem didn't have time to imagine how things might go. Peridot needed an answer, and she will give her one! "Peridot, look, I--" Lapis stopped after noticing her love's absence. Where the hell was she?!
 Her mind scrambled for an explanation and then she remembered how Peridot apologized, ashamed and scared, before running away. "Oh, stars! Peri!" In a snap, she got up from the invisible floor and went to search her companion, praying that she hasn't got too lost.
--------------------
 The former technician didn't know where she was. Well, technically, her answers were yes and no. As far as the green gem was concerned, she was stuck in a void-like dimension without hopes of going home. But she could also be in a coma, or in the Afterlife. So it was a yes and a no. Not that it mattered to her anyway.
 All Peridot planned to do that moment was lie on the floor and hope to be swallowed so she could forget her biggest fuck up. More tears of frustration fell from her eyes. This was the reason why she should've kept her wish locked in her mind. Because of it and her stupidity she had lost Lapis, the best that happened to her.
 The pain was unbearable. There were no friends to comfort her, no advice from Garnet to fix her mistake, no Temple or Little Homeworld, nothing to give her some solace from the loneliness. Everything she valued so much, gone. Only memories of it.
 'How could I be so stupid?! Laz was the only thing I have left! We were there for each other during this hellish journey and now she's gone! All because of my big mouth!' she yelled and punched the invisible ground hard. If there was a way to travel through time, the green Crystal Gem would take the chance without question so she could still be with Lapis. So she could at least enjoy her company in this miserable eternity.
 'I deserve this, though' she concluded sadly 'Lapis wouldn't be trapped in this place if it weren't for me. And still, she was so kind, didn't lash out, even if she had the right to. I wonder if she's looking for me...' Peridot snorted, bitterness in her features 'Who am I kidding? After saying what I said, it's obvious she'd rather forget I exist. Such ruler of the skies I've become. More like a butt, an idiotic and worthless butt'.
Without a single care in the world, the engineer started singing self-deprecating songs while laughing and crying at the same time. Time passed slowly, despite not feeling it at all, but then a voice interrupted her singing session much to her annoyance. "Ugh, not now, Lapis" she said, her mind too numb to register what was going on around her. 
Still, the other Crystal Gem didn't stop calling her name, and the more she tried to ignore it and keep wallowing in self-pity, the more insistent her companion became which made her snap. "I SAID NOT NOW, LAZULI!!!!" the green mechanic glared at Lapis who stopped but not for the glare but because of the huge relief she felt at finally finding Peri.
In a single movement, Lapis lifted her love in her arms and hugged her as if she was going to disappear if she let her go. "Thank stars you're ok, Peri! Don't do that again!" the blue gem held her close to her chest and that's when the other Crystal Gem got out of her funk, processing what had happened and looked at her companion confused.
 "Laz? W-Wait you're here? Why?" Lapis' relieved smile turned into a frown after hearing those questions. It sounded like Peridot doubted the idea of the blue gem trying to find her or wondering about her whereabouts. Like she didn't care at all.
 "What do you mean...? P-Peri, I was worried sick! I didn't know if I could find you or if you were ok. I even thought you got lost forever and that terrified me. What if something had happened and I wasn't there to protect you?"
 "But... But I thought you didn't want anything to do with me because... Because of--"
 "Because of you wanting to fuse with me?" Lapis answered for her and the pained expression on the green gem was enough for the other Crystal Gem to have her suspicions proven right. Slowly, she sat and invite Peridot to do the same in front of her. The former technician tensed greatly until a blue, gentle hand held hers to make the invitation friendlier, not more challenging, though Peri still prayed internally to not have to deal with this situation.
 "Do you want to start or should I?" Peridot shook her head in a silent plea to drop the subject, to change it, to be in silence only for Lapis to sigh. "Peridot, I don't want to force you to talk about this and I won't. Don't worry. But that doesn't mean we have to put it aside. If I had done that with the knowledge that I left you behind back then, would you have liked it?"
 "N-No... I wouldn't have" Lapis was going to continue, the green gem stopped her though "But still fusion is a sore spot for you! I-I mean, it's not that seeing some of our friends like Garnet, for example, makes you feel all uncomfortable and angry. Back then, in Homeworld, we saw Steven and the original Crystal Gems turn into Obsidian and it was great, but I know it's still...hard... I can't relate though. I've never fused with anyone, I even thought I was unable until I discovered I have ferrokinesis. But that was nothing compared to your experiences. What happened between you and...you know, Jasper... Even imagining it isn't enough. But the point is, I didn't want to put you through that, to remind you how it felt. I didn't want to hurt you"
 "Peri..." the blue gem caressed her love's cheek sweetly, moved by those words. Even with the pain and the stress, the mechanic was caring for her, thinking about her wellbeing "It's sweet of you doing that. Thanks. But now, let me do the same"
"Uh?" Peridot looked at her with a raised eyebrow and Lapis' smile for a bit bigger "Peridot, there are things that I cannot change. Many mistakes and misdeeds that I wish I could erase from my mind and my hands. Being fused with Jasper... Malachite... Those two are part of the list. I couldn’t stand being a prisoner, not after being trapped in a mirror for millennia. So I took the chance to unleash my rage and hatred on Jasper. I acted and became the worst when I was Malachite to the point of even missing those sensations. The lust of power, of control, to have my revenge. I liked it, I needed it, I hated it as much as I hated myself. I couldn’t stand fusion because It reminded me about what I had become. And when you said you wanted to fuse with me, I was shocked. Confused. And then I was scared. I didn't know what to do"
 "Did I make you feel like you were being forced?" Peridot's voice was small and afraid of having screwed up worse than she thought, but Lapis caressed her cheek again to ease her tension "No. You didn't force me, I was just surprised. The problem is that I don't know what is the right answer. And I don't want to hurt you either, Peri. Not after what I did to you when I left with the whole barn. You've done so much for me, you deserve to have your wishes come true. I don't know how though, and it's because of how I treated Jasper. If I said no, it would be to protect you from me, but you'd be sad to have your wish denied. But If I said yes, there might be the chance of you getting hurt and it would be my fault. I want you to be happy, Peri. But I want you safe too. And... And I'm afraid I don't have what it takes to do both"
 In a matter of seconds, two short, green arms wrapped around her neck, much to her surprise. She could hear some sniffs and a tear or two landed on her left shoulder. "You clod" Peridot said, barely keeping it together "Even with all that you did to Jasper, I would never see you as a threat. You are the best that happened to me. Really, the best. And you changed, Lapis. Sure you make mistakes and sometimes let your emotions get the best of you, but you're still great. You have come so far like me. You would never hurt me"
 "How do you know?" the blue gem couldn't believe what she was listening to. "Because I see it in your eyes. And yeah, it sounds cheesy and cliché as humans say, but I mean it! I truly do! Despite everything we put the other through, what we have has become something more beautiful and stronger than we could have imagined. So, whether you want to fuse or not, don't worry. As long as we're together, as long as you're at my side, it will be enough for me to be happy" Peridot tightened her hold on her companion before continuing "I'm j-just overjoyed that you don't hate me"
 "You silly" Lapis now was hugging her while crying "Why would I hate you? You're the best that happened to me too. Just because I'm not sure what to do concerning fusion, it doesn't mean that my feelings towards you are going to change. Peridot," Lazuli looked pulled away gently and looked at her seriously "I'm still unsure of what to do about your wish...and your safety too. To be honest, I don't trust myself. Not entirely when a subject like this comes to the picture. But, if you really want to fuse with me, I will do it then. For you. Let's give it a try"
 Peridot's mind was divided. A part of her was screaming in happiness because one of her wishes would come reality and it would be with her beloved. However, another part within her reminded the green gem about their powerless condition which prevented that wish to be fulfilled. "Thanks, Laz. You don't know how much that means to me... But, I, no, we can't. It's impossible"
 "What?" Saying that Lapis was shocked was an understatement after hearing that answer.
 "Laz, I don't know if you have forgotten but our powers are neutralized for some reason, and now that we're stuck here we cannot use them anymore. So, even if we try to fuse, nothing will happen. That was...another reason why I didn't want to tell you about my wish"
 "Oh" the blue gem facepalmed mentally for forgetting that simple but very important detail. She was so caught up reflecting about fusion, her mistakes, her relationship with Peridot and then trying to look for her love that she didn't think about the impossibility of fusing because of their condition. "I-I see... I'm sorry, Peri"
 "Hey, it's not your fault. Besides, you're here with me. We're together. I just hope you don't get bored with me as your only company"
 "Why would I? Peri, I've been alone a big part of my life and I even thought isolating myself would help me deal with the pain, but it didn't. Being with my family, my friends, with you especially, that's what helped me. You and I, there for each other, that's enough and I couldn't ask for anything else"
 Peridot smiled while a river of tears ran down her cheeks, she hugged Lapis again and savored the intimacy, the trust and love between them. Even with the rest of her lives in the void-like dimension, she knew deep down that with Lapis, that kind of end didn't sound so sad anymore.
 How much time did they spend like that, cuddled and hugging each other tightly? Both gems had no idea, though caring about that was out of question. Then, Lazuli got up from the floor and lent Peridot a hand who took it confusedly. "Is something wrong? Do you want to go somewhere else? Because there isn't so much to see if you have seen it"
 "No, Peri. It's not that. What if we dance for a while? Would you like to?" the green gem sighed sadly and was going to say what Lapis suspected but was interrupted "I know we cannot fuse, but I didn't ask you to dance so we can try on the impossible. I want to dance with you to pass the time. To enjoy it together. What do you say?"
 "Oh... Well, uuummm, I'm not that skilled in dancing, maybe I make a fool of myself"
 "It's ok, I can help you" A kind smile was enough for Peri to give in. Lapis right hand holding the engineer's left one, while the blue gem's left was in Peridot's right shoulder. Peri didn't know what to do with her right hand until Lapis instructed her to put it in her waist. With the position all set up, she moved to her right, her companion doing the same with her left foot; the same thing happened in the opposite direction.
 Minutes later, they were in a more synchronized and harmonic rhythm, Peridot finally leaving her tension and fear of feeling ridiculous behind to have some well-deserved fun with the person she loved most. Lapis' smile was bigger and shined marvelously at seeing her beloved enjoying the activity, relaxed and not full of self-hatred.
 Soon there were giggles that turned into laughs as the dance got more sophisticated. Both gems felt lighter, revitalized, energized by the other's company. This was more fulfilling than having her powers back, it felt like home seeing your significant one in front of you smiling.
 Peridot got more daring in the dance and gave Lapis a waltzes turn despite not being as tall as the blue gem, and in exchange, her companion did the same. Peri pecked her romantic partner's lips in an instant, smirking at the blushed face of Lazuli and put her in a deep dip. The other smiled amused and turned around with the green gem in her arms, dancing in circles elegantly.
 She'd never had so much fun, but then one of her feet made trip the other and she fell, back ready to collide with the invisible ground. Thankfully, Peri stopped her fall by grabbing her waist with both hands and all the strength she had which wasn't that much. Lapis looked at her surprised, the other gem blushed deeply trying to think on something to say, but her chance was taken by her love's laughter, so contagious that even Peridot snorted and erupted in giggles.
 It was liberating. The darkness, the silence, the harsh reality, their situation and everything they had lost, none of that mattered at that moment but the sheer joy of dancing with someone they loved. Moved by those sentiments, Lapis and Peridot pressed their foreheads to the other's and kissed like there was no tomorrow. Passion and love back together making them shine metaphorically and literally. Their whole bodies turning a blinding white, mixing together until becoming a big mass of light.
 'What is this?' It thought, confused and surprised 'Am I--?' But couldn't finish its sentence when a strong sense of longing hit it. Home. It wanted to go home. Family, friends, Little Homeworld, Steven, Pumpkin, all those words transformed into feelings, then into images that increased its brightness. It impulsed the being, like fuel for a rocket, to what it believed up was.
 Going fast or to the light's speed was an understatement, though the thing didn't care at all as long as it could find a way home, an exit from the desolated darkness. Without noticing, a tunnel made by light and shadows were taking shape in front of it.
 The being accelerated as it saw very far away bits of an opening. It looked like the sunlight going through the holes of a wall, that was enough for the thing to boost its energy. The end of the tunnel got closer and closer, the hole becoming clearer while letting more sunlight illuminate the path until it consumed everything.
 Then...
 "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" that was the only thing heard in the highest part of the highlands, coming from a mass of light which crashed on the top of a huge snow-covered, rocky pilar. In an instant, two figures emerged from the snow, spitting and coughing. Peridot rubbed her eyes and froze at the incredible change of scenery.
 There wasn't darkness or silence anymore. High hills and rocky columns were gathered in front of the majestic mountain whose peak they were trying to reach. "L-Lapis--" she was going to inform her romantic partner about her discovery until she saw the aghast gaze of the blue gem.
 "We escaped..." Lazuli's shocked whisper was a total contradiction with her expression, unable to believe that she and Peridot had gotten out of the darkness they had labeled as their end of the journey. The green gem launched at her with a hug crying of relief. Hope revived in a snap.
 Her blue companion took a bit to reciprocate the feeling but when she did, it was as fervent as Peri's. The svelte Crystal Gem spooned her love while jumping in circles, her giggles a mix of shock and faith she thought she had lost. "We're free, Peri! We're free! Free!" the other nodded endlessly, feeling like she could take on everything and everyone at once.
 "I don't care if I was proven wrong of being trapped there forever! We have another chance! We can still go back home!" Peridot pointed like an excited child to the top of the mountain. Its crevice spilling light in the form of a pilar.
 "We are so clo-- Aaaaggghhh!!!" Lapis fell to her knees much to Peri's concern. The tear-shaped gemstone felt like a giant battery, hot to the touch and sending deep-cutting volts to her whole body. Peridot's horrified gasped made her look at herself and Lapis didn't like what she saw.
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hollowistheworld · 6 years ago
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Never Say Never Say Never
Read on AO3            Support Me on Ko-Fi  
Sabo misses one New Year's party and apparently he misses all the important family updates.
A lot of people wanted to know how Sabo felt about this dating thing, so here’s a quick one-shot of him finding out. 
“Koala,” Sabo protested in a tone that was definitely not a whine, “I have to go. Do you know how much of a douche it’ll make me if I’m late to my own brother’s birthday dinner?”
Koala added another laptop charger to the bundle already in his arms. “No one in your family has ever been on time for anything. You’ll live.”
Sabo scowled at her, though it didn’t matter because she’d already gone back to rummaging around in the cabinets. “I thought deep cleans were supposed to be done in the spring.”
“It’s the new year, Sabo. I’ve put up with all of this garbage for too long. You said you’d help me clear it out, and now you’re going to.”
Sabo frowned down at the steadily growing pile of wires and cords and boxes and who knew what else that kept appearing from their apparently bottomless cabinets. “I didn’t think you meant on the first. It’s a holiday, you know.” He was not pouting.
“Only for white collar workers.” Koala reemerged and added several more cords to Sabo’s arms. “There. Finally. What, were they breeding in there?”
“They must have been. I don’t think we have a phone that goes with that one,” Sabo said, nodding vaguely to one of the charger cords.
Koala waved him off. “Go see which of those don’t work and then you can go.”
“I don’t remember you getting promoted over me, Koala.”
She raised an eyebrow and held eye contact with him for an impressively long time. Sabo could withstand one of her stares better than anyone else she knew. Sometimes he could even outlast her.
Not today though, apparently. “Alright, alright,” he said, surrendering. “What are you doing?”
She gestured at the main computer. “Clearing all the useless files off of this thing. So be glad I gave you the easy job, okay?”
Sabo stuck his tongue out at her and went to find an outlet to start testing the cords in.
It wasn’t too bad, once he started working at it. Half the cords could be tossed out without being tried; they were frayed or cracked or had tooth marks (from what, Sabo couldn’t even guess). A few were a pain, sending him on a wild goose chase for something to plug them into, but he was still done in under forty-five minutes, leaving him with plenty of time to meet Luffy and Ace at Sanji’s restaurant, as long as he got a decent cab driver. He'd mostly said he might be late in the hopes of convincing Koala to let him skip out on helping her clean.
“I’m leaving, Koala!” he shouted back into the store, front door already half open, not intending to give her a chance to find something else for him to do.
“I expect you to come in early tomorrow to help me finish!” she yelled back, and Sabo shut the door in a hurry, already planning to insist he’d been gone before she’d said it.
He loved his job, and he loved Koala, but he wasn’t going to spend one second more cleaning than he absolutely had to. That wasn’t why he’d joined up.
Knowing Koala would likely blow a gasket if she was bothered by someone who didn’t know how to read a CLOSED sign, Sabo locked the door behind him and made sure the sign announcing the store as DRAGON ELECTRONICS was turned off before turning to find a cab.
He’d probably have been more willing to help Koala clean if they’d been cleaning stuff up in the important parts of the store. Down in the basement - which was actually a much nicer workspace than the store above - shredding documents they no longer needed and couldn’t risk anyone finding, organizing files that had been left scattered across desks for far too long, or checking that the computers were still up to date and secure.
Sabo didn’t know how the electronics store itself, which was just a cover for an entirely different sort of business, could possibly have generated so much clutter in just a year. It rarely even got more than two customers in a day, though those customers had an uncanny ability to walk in at the worst possible times. Listening to people complain about their computers catching viruses from visiting sites they had no business visiting was a drag at the best of times; it was worse when they had ten minutes to get out of the building before their chance to get corrupt-rich-bastard-of-the-month taken down vanished.
Sabo shook his head to clear it. He had to be careful about thinking about work while outside of work, or he ran the risk of saying something he shouldn’t in front of Ace and Luffy - and once Luffy knew a secret it was only a matter of time before the word spread. He could be persuaded to keep his mouth shut if one could impress the seriousness of the secret on him, but Sabo would prefer to just avoid the problem altogether.
Ace, meanwhile, would probably burst a blood vessel if he ever found out that Sabo’s ‘boring IT desk job’ was a cover for what could generously be called a vigilante gig. His big brother instincts tended to only kick on in extreme situations, but Sabo was willing to bet committing felonies would be enough to set them off. And Ace would notice if Sabo let something slip that he hadn’t meant to, unlike Luffy, who could be easily distracted.
Sabo was just grateful that Garp rarely came up to visit for anything besides Christmas, maybe Thanksgiving, and a summer camping trip. He’d kick Sabo’s ass through half the city if he knew what Sabo really did for a paycheck.
So Sabo carefully but quickly, with the efficiency that came from years of practice, boxed up all of his thoughts about work that went beyond ‘Koala’s making me help her clean the store and it’s a nightmare’. By the time the cab stopped at the curve Sabo was fully back into the persona of ‘the best behaved brother’, a position he had worked hard to maintain. He would also argue he deserved it even with his job - he may have been breaking the most laws of the three of them, but he had better intentions than either of his ‘chaos storm’ brothers, as Dadan had used to call them. And everyone always said that he was the most polite.
Sabo entered the restaurant and made his way to the usual table, where Ace and Luffy were already sitting, Luffy staring towards the kitchen with laser focus.
“Look at you two, being on time for once,” Sabo teased with a grin.
Ace was frowning at Luffy rather than joining him in staring at the kitchen in anticipation, which struck Sabo as odd. All three of them tended to hyper-focus on food, and it was generally a bad sign when something could distract them from it.
“Marco gave us a ride,” Ace told him, still eyeing Luffy, tone distracted. “He had to come out this way anyway, to talk to Doma about one of the dogs.”
“So he dragged your asses out of the house kicking and screaming, I take it?”
Ace finally looked at him, grinning a little. “Luffy went kicking and screaming. I can be easily bribed.”
Sabo knew it. Marco didn’t seem to have a lot of interest in getting Ace to do much of anything most of the time, but when he was interested Ace rarely lasted more than a few minutes against him. Sabo figured that was probably a good thing - if Ace was allowed to run out the full gambit of his stubbornness his partner would probably murder him in cold blood. And he’d deserve it.
Sabo slid into the booth next to Ace, sidling up closer to his brother than he usually did. Being close to any of the three brothers during a meal was dangerous - every one of them had bitten at least one person who had gotten too close to their food over the course of their lives. Most often, it had been each other. Luffy was lucky to not have scars in the shape of Ace’s teeth marks.
But food hadn’t arrived yet, so Sabo was safe for a little while longer. And Luffy was thoroughly distracted by the prospect of dinner incoming, so he was unlikely to eavesdrop.
Not that Luffy was much good at eavesdropping anyway. Eavesdropping required at least a little bit of subtlety, and Luffy and subtle didn’t have so much as a passing acquaintanceship.
“What’s going on?” Sabo asked in a low voice, just loud enough for Ace to hear over all the background noise of the restaurant.
“Huh?”
Sabo rolled his eyes. “You’re looking at Luffy like he’s grown an extra head. What’d he do?” Sabo would have thought they were immune to Luffy’s oddities by now. Sabo had over a decade’s worth of exposure, and Ace had twice that. What could Luffy pull out of his hat that wasn’t some variation on something they’d seen a hundred times before?
Ace shook his head. “You are not going to believe this.”
There wasn’t much Sabo wasn’t ready and willing to believe in. “Try me.”
Ace shook his head harder. His expression was complicated - Ace’s expressions often were - but Sabo had had years and years to learn how to read them. There was fondness, exasperation, a little bit of annoyance, and a lot of disbelief. “Luffy’s dating someone.” He kept his voice low, so that Luffy - now chatting to one of the waiters who had made the mistake of passing too close to their table while collecting empty glasses - wouldn’t hear him, but the words seemed to burst out of him all the same.
Sabo raised an eyebrow. “Dating someone?” he repeated. That didn’t seem likely at all. Luffy had never once expressed an interest in dating. He was scornful of soulmate bonds, and beyond that he’d always seemed vaguely skeptical of the idea of romance or crushes. He’d certainly never showed any interest in trying it out for himself.
Ace nodded. “You remember that doctor with the gang tattoos?”
Sabo considered once more telling Ace that he was in no position to be judging other people’s tattoos, but decided it wasn’t really the time. “Yeah, the one whose dog we watched at Christmas, right?”
“That’s him.”
“What about him?” Sabo glanced at Luffy - if Sanji didn’t hurry up with dinner he was going to break into the kitchen - and back at Ace. “Luffy’s not…?”
“Yeah. Announced it last night. This morning. Whatever. At the party.”
Ace and Luffy had spent last night - New Year’s eve - at Whitebeard’s place, at one of their impressive parties. Sabo hadn’t gone, desperate to catch up on his sleep after a string of bad luck had nearly landed Hack in prison. And then he'd been nice and come in to help Koala with the cleanup from all that, and she'd tricked him into helping her clean up the literal mess of the storefront. See if he every volunteered to help her with something again.
“How long has that been going on?”
Ace shrugged one shoulder. “Not that long. At Christmas I - Luffy, where do you think you’re going?”
Luffy had sprung up from the table. “I’m gonna go find Sanji.”
There was no time to protest. Luffy could really move when he wanted to, even if he wasn’t actually running. He was halfway across the restaurant before Sabo or Ace had finished hearing what he’d said.
Ace waved him off. “He’s lucky he’s got a friend who’s a cook. Anyone else would have banned him ages ago.”
Sabo laughed. “Pretty sure he is banned from every restaurant between here and our place.”
“Probably. Anyway, as I was saying - I ran into the guy at Chopper’s birthday party. Law was getting fucking smashed at the bar, having a crisis about soulmates.” He looked at Sabo expectantly.
Sabo looked back, confused, for a few long seconds, and then his eyes widened. “Luffy’s that guy’s soulmate?” It shouldn’t have surprised him so badly, really. Just because Luffy didn’t have a soulmate didn’t mean anything about someone else having him for one. But it was still strange to even imagine.
It wasn’t personal towards Trafalgar Law. Sabo would have felt equally shocked no matter who Ace had said it was. With the possible exception of Zoro. Sabo could have believed Zoro had Luffy for a soulmate, he thought. But the idea of anyone else made his brain buck a little.
“Yeah. Not even two weeks after Trafalgar gets done telling me about how he can’t ever see himself dating his soulmate he’s sitting on our fucking couch holding Luffy’s hand, with Luffy’s damn name written on his arm.”
Sabo paused a second, distracted from the point. “It’s Luffy’s name? That’s his soulmate mark?”
“Yeah. So?”
“Nothing, it’s just…” Sabo laughed a little. “God, that’s so cliche.”
Ace smirked, and it broadened until he was laughing too. “Christ , I know, right? Poor guy. He said it didn’t start as Luffy’s name, but can you imagine going through life with something that boring for your soulmate mark and then that comes hurtling into your life?” When he said ‘that’ he gestured towards the kitchen, where Luffy was no doubt making a nuisance of himself.
The two of them laughed, trying to be quiet at first, then realizing Luffy wasn’t there to overhear and demand to know what was so funny, and they grew louder and louder until they were doubled over the table, clutching their sides and getting funny, judgmental looks from the other restaurant patrons.
Sabo recovered first, wheezing and hiccuping back to sanity in fits and bursts. “Okay, okay,” he managed, struggling not to start laughing all over again at the sight of Ace still giggling to himself. “Does Luffy at least seem happy with him?”
Ace shrugged. “Dude, it’s Luffy. He seems happy with everyone.”
That was a fair point. “Happy dating him. Like, Law’s not being… I don’t know, weird about it? He’s not trying any shit about how Luffy has to do whatever he wants because he’s his soulmate?” It was hard to imagine Luffy allowing somebody to be a dick to him for any reason, soulmate mark included, but Sabo was his older brother. He was supposed to worry about things like that.
“Not that I saw.” Ace took a drink of water and reached for the table’s pitcher to refill his glass. “I don’t even know if Luffy knows they're soulmates.”
“Should we tell him?”
Ace shrugged again, but with a more serious look on his face this time. This was one of the things he’d been thinking about while he’d been staring at Luffy. “I don’t know. You’re better at this relationship crap. What do you think?”
“How am I the one who’s good at relationships? Apparently, I’m the only single one.”
Ace made a broad, vague gesture with one arm. “Not just dating. You’re better with people. It’s why you’re in retail.”
Sabo was nowhere near good enough with people to really be in retail, but he didn’t say so to Ace. “This just started last night?” he asked instead.
“Yeah, far as I know. And like I said, Trafalgar was having his life crisis at Christmas time, so it couldn’t have been much longer than that anyway.”
Sabo glanced back towards the kitchen. Luffy had reappeared, walking backwards, as though he had to guide Sanji to their table. “Let’s give him a couple of days. If he doesn’t tell Luffy about it, we’ll know he’s a bastard, and we’ll send his ass back to kingdom come.”
“And if he does tell Luffy?”
“Then we’ll play it by ear. Come on, this is Luffy we’re talking about. If Law pisses him off we’ll be able to hear him complaining about it from space.”
Luffy reached the table, Sanji and dinner in tow, and Sabo slid a safe distance away from his brother. It wasn’t surprising that Ace was so concerned. In addition to his - their whole family’s - complicated tangle of emotions regarding soulmate bonds, Ace just didn’t trust other people very easily, particularly not where his brothers were concerned. He was always worrying about the sort of people Luffy was hanging out with, if they were trustworthy, if they might take advantage of Luffy’s friendly, trusting nature.
Sabo worried about that sometimes, but mostly he tended to worry about what he considered to be more realistic concerns - like Luffy falling off a building while parkouring around town and splitting his head open on the concrete. Maybe dating a doctor would be for the best.
“So, Luffy,” Sabo said as the three of them began digging into their dinners. “I hear you have a boyfriend?”
Despite having his mouth full, Luffy grinned.
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hope-isgood · 5 years ago
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Hey guys. I’m having a pretty rough time... Can you help me take my mind off of things and send me some ask or questions? Hers’s a list of what you might ask if you don’t have any ideas. I’ll appreciate any kind of ask 📨❤
1. What weird food combinations do you really enjoy?
2. What social stigma does society need to get over?
3. What food have you never eaten but would really like to try?
4. What’s something you really resent paying for?
5. What would a world populated by clones of you be like?
6. Do you think that aliens exist?
7. What are you currently worried about?
8. Where are some unusual places you’ve been?
9. Where do you get your news?
10. What are some red flags to watch out for in daily life?
11. What movie can you watch over and over without ever getting tired of?
12. When you are old, what do you think children will ask you to tell stories about?
13. If you could switch two movie characters, what switch would lead to the most inappropriate movies?
14. What inanimate object would be the most annoying if it played loud upbeat music while being used?
15. When did something start out badly for you but in the end, it was great?
16. How would your country change if everyone, regardless of age, could vote?
17. What animal would be cutest if scaled down to the size of a cat?
18. If your job gave you a surprise three day paid break to rest and recuperate, what would you do with those three days?
19. What’s wrong but sounds right?
20. What’s the most epic way you’ve seen someone quit or be fired?
21. If you couldn’t be convicted of any one type of crime, what criminal charge would you like to be immune to?
22. What’s something that will always be in fashion, no matter how much time passes?
23. What actors or actresses play the same character in almost every movie or show they do?
24. In the past people were buried with the items they would need in the afterlife, what would you want buried with you so you could use it in the afterlife?
25. What’s the best / worst practical joke that you’ve played on someone or that was played on you?
26. Who do you go out of your way to be nice to?
27. Where do you get most of the decorations for your home?
28. What food is delicious but a pain to eat?
29. Who was your craziest / most interesting teacher
30. What “old person” things do you do?
31. What was the last photo you took?
32. What is the most amazing slow motion video you’ve seen?
33. Which celebrity do you think is the most down to earth?
34. What would be the worst thing to hear as you are going under anesthesia before heart surgery?
35. What’s the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten?
36. What’s the most expensive thing you’ve broken?
37. What obstacles would be included in the World’s most amazing obstacle course?
38. What makes you roll your eyes every time you hear it?
39. What do you think you are much better at than you actually are?
40. Should kidneys be able to be bought and sold?
41. What’s the most creative use of emojis you’ve ever seen?
42. When was the last time you got to tell someone “I told you so.”?
43. What riddles do you know?
44. What’s your cure for hiccups?
45. What invention doesn’t get a lot of love, but has greatly improved the world?
46. What’s the most interesting building you’ve ever seen or been in?
47. What mythical creature do you wish actually existed?
48. What are your most important rules when going on a date?
49. How do you judge a person?
50. If someone narrated your life, who would you want to be the narrator?
51. What was the most unsettling film you’ve seen?
52. What unethical experiment would have the biggest positive impact on society as a whole?
53. When was the last time you were snooping, and found something you wish you hadn’t?
54. Which celebrity or band has the worst fan base?
55. What are you interested in that most people aren’t?
56. If you were given a PhD degree, but had no more knowledge of the subject of the degree besides what you have now, what degree would you want to be given to you?
57. What smartphone feature would you actually be excited for a company to implement?
58. What’s something people don’t worry about but really should?
59. What movie quotes do you use on a regular basis?
60. Do you think that children born today will have better or worse lives than their parents?
61. What’s the funniest joke you know by heart?
62. When was the last time you felt you had a new lease on life?
63. What’s the funniest actual name you’ve heard of someone having?
64. Which charity or charitable cause is most deserving of money?
65. What TV show character would it be the most fun to change places with for a week?
66. What was cool when you were young but isn’t cool now?
67. If you were moving to another country, but could only pack one carry-on sized bag, what would you pack?
68. What’s the most ironic thing you’ve seen happen?
69. If magic was real, what spell would you try to learn first?
70. If you were a ghost and could possess people, what would you make them do?
71. What goal do you think humanity is not focused enough on achieving?
72. What problem are you currently grappling with?
73. What character in a movie could have been great, but the actor they cast didn’t fit the role?
74. What game have you spent the most hours playing?
75. What’s the most comfortable bed or chair you’ve ever been in?
76. What’s the craziest conversation you’ve overheard?
77. What’s the hardest you’ve ever worked?
78. What movie, picture, or video always makes you laugh no matter how often you watch it?
79. What artist or band do you always recommend when someone asks for a music recommendation?
80. If you could have an all-expenses paid trip to see any famous world monument, which monument would you choose?
81. If animals could talk, which animal would be the most annoying?
82. What’s the most addicted to a game you’ve ever been?
83. What’s the coldest you’ve ever been?
84. Which protagonist from a book or movie would make the worst roommate?
85. Do you eat food that’s past its expiration date if it still smells and looks fine?
86. What’s the most ridiculous thing you have bought?
87. What’s the funniest comedy skit you’ve seen?
88. What’s the most depressing meal you’ve eaten?
89. What tips or tricks have you picked up from your job / jobs?
90. What outdoor activity haven’t you tried, but would like to?
91. What songs hit you with a wave of nostalgia every time you hear them?
92. What’s the worst backhanded compliment you could give someone?
93. What’s the most interesting documentary you’ve ever watched?
94. What was the last song you sung along to?
95. What’s the funniest thing you’ve done or had happen while your mind was wandering?
96. What app can you not believe someone hasn’t made yet?
97. When was the last time you face palmed?
98. If you were given five million dollars to open a small museum, what kind of museum would you create?
99. Which of your vices or bad habits would be the hardest to give up?
100. What really needs to be modernized?
101. When was the last time you slept more than nine hours?
102. How comfortable are you speaking in front of large groups of people?
103. What’s your worst example of procrastination?
104. Who has zero filter between their brain and mouth?
105. What was your most recent lie?
106. When was the last time you immediately regretted something you said?
107. What would be the best thing you could reasonably expect to find in a cave?
108. What did you think was going to be amazing but turned out to be horrible?
109. What bit of trivia do you know that is very interesting but also very useless?
110. What’s the silliest thing you’ve seen someone get upset about?
111. What animal or plant do you think should be renamed?
112. What was the best thing that happened to you today?
113. As a child, what did you think would be awesome about being an adult, but isn’t as awesome as you thought it would be?
114. When’s censorship warranted?
115. What’s the most boring super hero you can come up with?
116. What would be some of the downsides of certain superpowers?
117. What word is a lot of fun to say?
118. What current trend do you hope will go on for a long time?
119. What actors or actresses can’t play a different character because they played their most famous character too well?
120. Where’s your go to restaurant for amazing food?
121. What’s something that all your friends agree on?
122. What’s your best story from a wedding?
123. What languages do you wish you could speak?
124. What’s the most pleasant sounding accent?
125. What’s something that everyone, absolutely everyone, in the entire world can agree on?
126. What country is the strangest?
127. What’s the funniest word in the English language?
128. What’s some insider knowledge that only people in your line of work have?
129. Who do you wish you could get back into contact with?
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130. How do you make yourself sleep when you can’t seem to get to sleep?
131. If people receive a purple heart for bravery, what would other color hearts represent?
132. What are some of the best vacations you’ve had?
133. If there was a book of commandments for the modern world, what would some of the rules be?
134. What’s the craziest video you’ve ever seen?
135. What’s your “Back in my day, we…”?
136. If you could know the truth behind every conspiracy, but you would instantly die if you hinted that you knew the truth, would you want to know?
137. What animal would be the most terrifying if it could speak?
138. What’s the worst hairstyle you’ve ever had?
139. What habit do you have now that you wish you started much earlier?
140. If you were given one thousand acres of land that you didn’t need to pay taxes on but couldn’t sell, what would you do with it?
141. What about the opposite sex confuses you the most?
142. When was the last time you yelled at someone?
143. What’s the opposite of a koala?
144. What kinds of things do you like to cook or are good at cooking?
145. What life skills are rarely taught but extremely useful?
146. What movie universe would be the worst to live out your life in?
147. If you could hack into any one computer, which computer would you choose?
148. Who do you feel like you know even though you’ve never met them?
149. What’s the most ridiculous animal on the planet?
150. What’s the worst thing you’ve eaten out of politeness?
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