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abyssalpriest · 2 years ago

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On the Name Tengri, 20230622

An extensive exploration of some anxieties regarding using the name Tengri for the Day Sky spirit - 'Day Sky god' to illustrate his immensity if 'spirit' sounds small in your head - I have known since before I knew any of his names, specifically exploring why I choose to use that name despite not working with anyone from Mongolia. A very touchy topic and choice for many people, including for me; it was a choice I didn't want to make. I hope though if you have opinions on my choice that you consider this essay on why I do so. I have to stress the choice to use the name was almost made for me; the choice was a step presented to me face-on to prove I am more willing to listen to him and spirits of nature than incarnated, uninvolved humans regarding the Otherside and working with nature, requested of me in my workings with him. I want to deepen my workings and become more full-time involved with the Sky as I used to be and as such he, my guiding Sun, has provided a test to see if I actually want to listen to spirits or only pursue that which humans already approve of. That is part of the reasoning, the rest follows. This essay exists to explore and lay out what I believe is right to do. On top of this discussion on the name I also explore my memories and workings with him, the Day Sky, mostly from off this plane and pre-incarnation as this life, Dei, as well as what my relationship has been with him so far. The scariest part remains that I haven't let myself look into much of anything regarding this name because I have felt I was out of place and out of line, so I do not know what I am getting into by nature of my hesitance. Hence: The more I ignore this, the more toes I am inevitably stepping on. If I want to let myself be reborn as a part of the Day Sky incarnated though I have to take the step to listen to the Day Sky again.

Obviously since this is posted here, the entity I talk about is the one I know by the names Leviathan, Shiva, Poseidon, etc.

"Why do you claim to work with Tengri? Tell me as if I were the ones you fear, tell me as if I had a sword to your throat. Tell me why you worship me. Defend your territory."

Because from the very beginning, before I knew the names Leviathan, Shiva, Poseidon, as anything more than distant and impersonal stars on the horizon it was about the encompassing Day Sky. I was about the Day Sky. I had an entire blog for Christ's sake documenting my relationship with you and the Day, a thing within which I poured the energy that sprang up from inside me regarding the sky, filled with distant memories of being up there as a sky spirit. In and as a part of the Day Sky I watched humanity evolve from and into specs of nothingness. Time blurs up there, Space takes on Time like it's holding a sleeping lover, with Time becoming more of a suggestion and Space the waking eyes of reality. I watched, non-linearly if you try to map my experiences to human history, arisings of civilisation emerge and emanate and then return inwards like blooming moulds and like the way flowers dance with the Sun - or the inverse, death to birth, since with eyes tied to the Firmament you can See within any direction. All doors in the Day Sky map to the compass and it acts as a doorway to all views. Open, close, bloom, wilt, civilisations ebb and flow even inside the same time frame, and temples to you grow brick-by-brick in blurred tempos and face you like sunflowers.

I've seen civilisations in every period divided more by energy than story-based timing... Late Egypt feels different to Early Egypt to put a name to an example though every civilisation has varied similarity, that's what separates them, time periods are as much a spatial separation as "here" and "there". Through your guidance, your water around my eyes, I see their Gravitational cohesion and their centres of mass, their quasi-souls, these thrumming hive-centres that morph and change like the centipede forms of Time - like you stretched across existence with your hundreds of hands in everything. I've watched with abstracted hawk eyes - two for every feather on my wings - from above the gardens of this Earth bloom and take shape and wilt and die in a slow motion dream of a fireworks show... And we did that together. Spirits of the Day Sky - plural as many more I'm sure had similar experiences - watching the arising and birth and subsequent death of humanity in a photo album of atemporal - but laid out that way for a reason - story beats...

We were unanimous as the wind dragged into spirals by your wings. You would pull us along like a horse pulls its chariot, like a conductor with his choir at the beck and call of your hands...

I know you because I know you. I work with you because I always have worked with you. You are a force of cohesion in the Day Sky of which I have always been a part. There is no I without You because you have always been a part of where I am from. You are like the water in the veins to us as an animal cell, you are the lightning in our clouds, the Day Sky weaving between molecules, the Sun's Gravitational pull that holds the Day together. And you have been here for eons, you have existed in this blue space since before humans were a thing on this plane...

I have come to incarnate for my own reasons, but I still exist up there and my soul calls out to yours eternally, constantly, as you are that which holds together the thing that I am a part of. Why does an animal beg for meat? Why does a baby cry for milk? Because they are sustained by these things in the way that the animal and baby intake them and they become a part of their bodies. The meat, the milk, it weaves into the fabric of their selves between their ribs and their muscles, it becomes them in the desperate way of... Without these things, there will be no animals, no babies. Without you I am not sustained. There is no soul of mine without the Eternal Blue Sky. I have and always will be a day sky spirit who is in tune with and relies on you and therefore my body will always ache for your presence, no matter if my body is pure inorganic chemistry of Space and Time and blue-lit molecules that is bound by the abstracted letters of your name, or raw meat craving to speak it in its full, vocalised form. Whether I am that uninvoked thing that sits in the womb of your name or I am birthed and screaming for air to say it, I will exist to be in relation to you. Your name will always be either within or without me. Now that I am human, I am squishy, I am incarnate, my flesh-bound eyes and mind and the blood through my veins look back up at you and know you as home.

To the audience, though, because that is what this is about:

'Tengri'? Why that name? Because you know when you're talking to Tengri. You know, when you have been involved with him, that he is who he says he is. He does not hide behind fake names when he works with you, he has enough power that when you know him, you know he does not need to pretend to be someone he is not. He does not hide. Sometimes he slips through the cracks in Creation yes, lays like an alligator submerged to his under-eye line, stands black in swathes of shadows... But when you are ready to know him you know him. It is so clear through nature spirit eyes that the spirit I work with is, to speak through the human tongue and communal human understandings so you have a reference to understand, the one who came down to you all as Genghis Khan and left a footprint the size of his claws across the entire world when he did so. He is the keen-eyed hawk, the intelligence in the machine, driven, up front, with a presence like a wall of black water. The racing horses, the father in the wilderness, the encompasing slow dream. He is like the hungry wolf's drive and muzzle when the prey is marked for death, the storm of hoofbeats melding together as a song, the storm clouds approaching on the horizon with the sweeping of birds as his eyes before it, the wind as his tendrils reaching out and curling around reality. He is the ecstatic dancing to drums and the flying of the hawk, the opening of eyes on the other side, the illumination of reality. Why wouldn't I believe him when he says he is the one known as Tengri?

He is the immensity of rain - the immensity of water, really, because rain is like the visible form of his compared to all of him that you will never see like the water underground, in rivers out of view, in the plants around us. In your veins. If you knew to look you'd see him there. He is the immensity that has woven itself through humanity's very existence in a myriad of ways whether it is his incarnations' DNA, the Sky and rain cycling through you to keep you alive, the spirit of nature aroused in your mind when you finally grip on to something off this plane, the presence of the Great Sky above that has been eternal since before our conception... He has encompassed humanity since before its birth. But he is to his family also the calm day sky, the Summer's midday, morning, and afternoon, love in its outreaching form. A strict teacher yes, and not one to protect humans from natural laws of nature and its order, but he is still a loving guardian of humans he takes under his wings. To those who are considered his family... He is the imposing and elegant father with a presence of a collective human understanding of what a father is weighing down on us, the small children who observe him. He is the intelligence of eons of study and research, the... I could speak forever. He is the immensity of the Day Sky and all its complexity, the father on the outskirts, the teacher in the wilderness, and expressly, literally, not metaphorically, the Day Sky interwoven with the seasons, nature, weather, and the spirits around. He is Tengri.

How do I know this is Tengri and not Dyeus? Zeus? Anyone else? They all have their own energies, their own approaches. I do not know every sky deity in general but especially not this life, I was unsure this life who Dyeus was, for example. But I know the one who calls himself Zeus intimately: Electric, wild yet confined, the wilderness overlaid across civilisation so that he is barely one or the other, the law maker, the meaningless (in terms of body language it has no communication) grin behind the folds of Time, the one who wields his staff like a still statue immense and liquid not in the way of water, but like plasma, boiling concoction beneath a barely moving lid, the dust-grey shadows, the black and white static on television screens, the irreconcilable paradoxes reconciled and contained. Madness of storms in the intact and civil titan form of a king. On the surface perfectly poised and orderly but under it the wilderness of nature, and under that poised and orderly, ad infinitum. He interacts with humanity in a similar but different way to the Day Sky that I know - wears a different sense of fatherhood, wields a different sort of Law, enacts a different kind of judgement. Sky gods are not interchangeable in the way that people from one homeland aren't; you may find enough similarities to call them synonymous if you never get to know them, but they remain independent outside of your brash opinions on them.

If you don't agree with the syncretisations of Tengri - Leviathan - Shiva then I would far sooner erase all my knowledge of him in other cultures thinking I may have gotten it wrong than lie and say I thought he wasn't Tengri, and that's even despite the fact that he's done a lot of work to show me himself in other cultures. Regardless, I'd sooner discard every other name because he showed me himself, in vivid visions and the recreations in his Mental territories, lands that I had never seen before, because this life I have been incredibly out of touch with this planet's linear space I did not know how to recognise Mongolia, Tibet, and similar areas he frequents. I don't come here to sit and relearn geographical maps and histories of this place - nothing wrong with learning that, I'm highlighting that everyone has their own reasons for being here including me and I just have not been in touch with this planet since my childhood. He would show me, though, sweeping areas of land between heavy mountains. Flat expanses of what seemed like bristly wind-worn and desaturated plants, rocks, thin rivers, and expansive heavy mountains arising from them. Nothing like tree-filled valleys between mountains which was all I had ever seen, but spaces where the land gave way and sank under the caress of the sky itself. Hugely empty of cities and villages, a land with such a specific energy...

I've been drawing this setting over and over and over in my art since I was a child. I sit here every time I choose to draw an outdoors background saying "ugh, why does it always have to be plain grassy flat land with mountains, it doesn't make any sense" - even in recent years as I obsess over symbolism and accuracy and detail in art and I want interesting, varied landscapes, I cave to the same open fields and mountains because specifically it feels like home as if it were opening a portal to somewhere specific, somewhere I know in my heart, my memories. Somewhere significant, my body aches for something similar, and I am viscerally aware of the fact that I know, somewhere, what I am drawing. I cannot stop myself. It was only recently I found out this sort of place exists on this plane. Images of Mongolia strike the strangest most visceral sense of normality and aching for experiences I have long forgotten, but know as very, very familiar.

My mind is pregnant with the imagery of this place birthing experiences that are always tied to it, because we - I following the Day - had always been around the area. When I first looked up Mongolia after relearning that name Tengri this life I was shocked, in awe. Like the vivid landscapes in his visions, in his mindspace/Mental territory that I spend time in, like the same repeating landscape that spews from my hand's every time I draw, that dances in my mind as familiar and homely to the point that I had made myself, in his Dreamland territory, a home in an ever-stormy field I came across that was vast flat land between mountains... I can't stress how alien this landscape was to someone who has lived all their years in Australian cities and Irish subburbs. I had never, including online, seen images of anything like what I drew and saw in visions until Tengri reconnected with me in name this life, and what I thought was alien and just my own nonsense was suddenly confirmed as completely grounded. This place, Mongolia as I know now, has echoed through all my interactions with the Day as I know him... And just like the Day repeats in my stories and characters all through my life from when I was born, Mongolia has echoed too. The part of me that knows the Day intimately knows Mongolia well.

The question also arises that, if that is indeed Leviathan, Shiva, why not just work with those names? Well, technically I do, but I'm taking this question to mean "why not leave the name entirely alone and focus on what you have?" Multiple reasons.

First, but not chiefly: As I was saying, this name and his connection to Mongolia have been playing in my mind since I was a child. He has been meeting me and dragging me to Mongolia in visions, going there with me off-plane too - and he is heavily aware of where he's bringing me and his own reasons of why. Even when he knew I had no clue what this place was, he made sure I saw where we were so one day I would know - purposely setting our meetings in the backdrop of this land since before I knew the name Tengri. Yes, we have met elsewhere, but as a part of his entourage in the Sky... We go where he goes. I remember when I was told this spirit, the Day as I knew him, uses the name Tengri: one of the most vivid takings-over I have experienced, one moment I was being given a set of letters in a name I'd never heard or at least never paid attention to, the next I felt so much awakening in myself and such a visceral awakening of my awareness, threads pulled together within me, bonds being formed between us, bonds between I and the Day, before - and while - I was pulled by him out of awareness of my body for him to stand with him in this land that I had still not seen physically up to this point, and talk to me about his role there, talk to me as Tengri, vividly.

I am indivisible from my Lord - "Lord" being a human roleplay with him, nature has no Lords - my connection to him has always first and foremost been through him as the Blue Sky. My conscious awakenings in this life have been mostly sky blue, my energy sings with it, my soul is interwoven with it. He teaches humans the art of communicating with spirits and how to work with the weather and nature itself, with spirits on the other side; he teaches how to dress yourself in the parts of and become animals and make boats in the form of tools of their bodies to move within, to travel between worlds, to understand dreams and walk with them; he teaches spiritual laws, physics, mathematics, science, cosmology... An intellect further reaching and more interwoven with reality than even the blue sky that we see above us - the Day Sky's intellect stretches through so much more than the molecules above us that science would dictate as the boundaries of our atmosphere. He teaches awareness and awakening like the rising sun illuminates everything around us...

Second reason as to why I use that name, and chiefly: To him, Tengri is not just a name and Mongolia is not just yet another place he has been called to by humans. It repeats through his expressions, his vision imagery, it reflects heavily in the human appearance he takes that echoes so thoroughly his people there... Which means it is a heavy part of him. Even when I sit with him in the human form he takes and talk about the most mundane and non-Mongolian things, Mongolia is written, stitched, into his features. To claim to love (this spirit) and ignore him as Tengri and to ignore Mongolia would be akin to claiming to love your spouse but refusing to visit his foreign family, to eat their cuisine, to partake in their customs while you are in their house. Metaphorical, please remember, I am not partaking in any customs and culture other than what I am told to do by him, which may possibly be recognisable to people there but will never be Mongolian. I can never claim that path, nor is it what I'm here to do. It is not about inputting yourself in a foreign culture, it is about respecting the ones your family is a part of when you are interacting with that family. He has been family to me since before I was born and as such I will respect and acknowledge his family.

I will never walk the path of a Mongolian shaman and I will never walk the path of anything Mongolian full stop. I will likely never step foot there on this plane. If I were supposed to be Mongolian this life I would've incarnated there, if Tengri wanted me to go the full experience of working with him solely under this name he would've brought me there. I will never claim to know "Tengri" in the way they know him, because "Tengri" by right of it being their name for him is inherently their understanding of him and their connection to him, it is shorthand for both he and them. In this life I am Australian and Indian so Shiva is the emanation of him that I will study and tie myself to, the blue-throated, sky-clad one who eternally pours down water on to Earth through his hair, the ascetic storm on the outskirts, the howling one, the master teacher, the consciousness awaking in all of us. But I love him beyond names, I have followed him since a time and place before names - I have known him since we existed in a place with no mouths to speak names - and I have had the honour of being exposed to his home in Mongolia so I will, 'til my dying breath and beyond it, always respect Mongolia's weight on his and therefore my existence and have a deep respect for her people and his family there - and I am in a time and space now where names are a very beautiful and important form of marking relationships and connecting with those around you - which is what I express when I say "Tengri". "Tengri" is him and it is his connection to them, to honour "Tengri" is to honour that connection. To say that the Day Sky is Tengri is not to say I dictate who is and isn't Tengri and what Mongolian people believe and don't believe, it is honouring that I believe them when they say they know the Day Sky, that they know he is very real, and they have worked with him for enough generations to confirm that he exists both on the other side and on this one. I believe them wholeheartedly. The Day Sky you live under is an ineffibly wondrous and vital thing.

Of course he taught those in a land he calls home his vital arts and if I want to truly follow him, I should acknowledge that. If I really want to work with him and learn from him this lifetime, to love him as fully as I want to do, I need to respect his home. It boils down to that. He can be very distant until you form a bond with him, he teaches those that mean something to him his arts, therefore in a way to me "Tengri" is an understanding of the human bonds to the Day Sky to the point he is attached enough to be willing to teach us his ways. I say this now, this far through the essay, because that thought will always come second to the understanding of that name as being the one Mongolia gives him.

To worship "Tengri" is not the same as worshiping (insert name that I call him personally). Firstly, because it isn't really worship, we have a working relationship built on what we both need and want from each other. I don't bend the knee to him, the 'Unordained Priest' roleplay I take on is purely that, fictional roleplay. It helps me learn to trust again, it is him guiding me to take back symbols that were stolen from me, to let myself be reborn - a very slow process for a spirit, slower than the 9 months of gestation - into myself, to translate myself from the egg and sperm of Day and Earth into a medium, 'priest' in my cultures' tongues, between the two like every one of us are. The words and names we play with like 'priest' (and "Tengri") are a code he inputs into my energy to wake me up and assist the birthing process. But outside of the blog I run I talk to him like any other friend or family member, most of whom are spirits as well, although I can never hide the deep adoration I have for him, something that runs so much further than a human idea of love and infatuation into an eternal lived-in gratitude and acceptance of him as, in a way, my Source as he is for many others.

That "it's not worship" part aside, and with the understanding of worship as to be devoted to, to work with, to revere and love deeply: to "worship Tengri" is to walk into the house of a lover as a guest, to greet their mother by the name in their tongue used to call to a beloved family member, to eat their food, to listen to their music, play their games, and leave all that at the door when I walk out. In this case... I do not enter the house, I do not pick up the cultural habits because I don't live around anyone from Mongolia who could show me that. My entrance is as far as the door of the name and the silence between he and I in his empty house where we dance to his culture, his introduction to what he wants from me. I eat his food, listen to his music, etc, in a house that usually has his family in it but I do not get to meet them.

I do not claim anything because I was incarnated where I was and as who I am to always, now, from the other side, see him as an outsider. Where once he was home, home is now very far away on the other side of a wall only death can transgress. To worship "Tengri" is a temporary endeavour of the heart with a temporary name only invoked to pay respects to all of him that is expressed in that name, and those families on Earth in Mongolia who he endlessly adores and spends so much time with. It is an acknowledgement of the ways he expresses himself since he expresses himself differently under each name, and of my inherent, unshakeable connection to him as the Day Sky, of a lifetime of seeing this place with my workings with the Day Sky, and of the sheer force of impact that land has had on my psyche. It is a way to pay respects to both him and his people. And it also a declaration and a reminder of what no longer is and where I do not belong, where he ends and I begin, where we do not connect. It is a respect for all of these things, presence and absence, love and longing, rights of my births and the things I respect that I am not allowed to touch.

Of course, I cannot avoid that chiefly the reason I use that name is: Because he told me to. He is the one who showed me himself as Tengri and what that means to him and said that I should trust him and do so, because at the end of the day I am here (partly) for him explicitly, and to work with him on this plane from the other side; I will one day die and return to him so there is no point putting my own anxieties of etiquette and temporary human discomfort above serving him. I would never want to upset the people who formed that relationship with him under that name in general but especially since they are indivisible from my soul's love, but I cannot claim to serve and learn from him - I cannot claim to respect him - if he tells me to do something and I ignore him and sit here waiting for other humans who mostly are not even related to his worship and Mongolia to tell me that he has permission to teach me. Who is actually in charge if that's how I treat him?

If I really respect the people who worship him - the Hindus, the Egyptians, whoever it is that has met the Day Sky and has brought him into their society and mythos with a name - would I not respect the spirit that both they and I know understands them and would not just willy-nilly start asking foreigners to do something that harms these groups? Because I do not work with impulses, ideas, I do not only work with tarot cards with vague meanings. I am not presuming he has approached me, not drawing string lines between possible signs and looking up on Wikipedia who it might be. I travel across planes, I speak with him in languages humans don't know as well as ones we do know, I act as one of his black wolves, I fly in his skies. I have seen things of him and been in places where many people who work with him (globally, not talking about any specific place) could not follow by right of our Day Sky connection. I have rejoined him this incarnation on the other side to bring storms, rain, he has shown me how to meld my consciousness into the weather system... He and I reconnect constantly. I explicitly talk with the form he takes to be understandable to humans, and I also communicate as a sky spirit with him in ways most humans would not understand.

I am not presuming he said anything based on simple signs and gut feelings - I have heard his infinitely vibrant voice growl the name Tengri and let its talons dig into my flesh, an eternal sky burial taking place synonymous with my constant birth into this incarnation. I have played with him as a little spirit in the immense churnings of his wings, I have walked with him. I do not presume, I find out. I have found out. He has spoken, and continues to do so in English translated through the strings of my brain's workings as he roosts his consciousness within the parts of it I cannot even comprehend, in spirit languages, in changing the weather as he walks and talks with lightning flashes punctuating revelations, telling me to go outside to sit with him as a blue-sky storm starts as soon as I walk out, rain coinciding immediately with his emotions, his energy filling the space from the ground to the top of the sky - and below and above it. He speaks through everything and I do all in my power to intricately rewrite myself so that I speak his language, his intricacies, his suggestions, his body language (whether body means the forms he takes or the sky itself), his symbolism - I do everything within my power to clarify when I dont understand so that I can be an increasingly more accurate translator of his impulses. It becomes a matter of: Do I really respect these people if I have proven that I have their god in front of me and kick him to the curb, deny him his autonomy, and say "no, if you really were who you were you'd stay in your territory so clearly you're a disrespectful trickster"? Is that really respecting Mongolia?

I am here to anchor him on to this plane - since before I knew his name I knew my purpose this life is "to reconnect people and the sky" - and to strengthen his connection with humanity, and therefore I need to actually shut up and listen to what he wants me to do, and if that includes using that name when many western people would say that Mongolian people would find it disrespectful... Well. I don't trust people in my country to speak on Mongolia, and I cannot bring myself to disrespect and throw out the Blue Sky above them on the off chance I am making a huge mistake... If I am making a mistake, so be it. The forces that be can teach me; I am Hindu in a near-official sense, Karma will bring me back where I need to be in the next life and I will try again. But he is the one that taught me what I said above: That this is respect for his family and his connection to them. This is about honouring them as a group, honouring Mongolia, and if I were to be Mongolian in practice or culture I would have been born there so I will only ever do so in the peripherals. He teaches that. I am not claiming anything but expressing respect for who he is.

My job is to reach into places he does not have many eyes and see for him, I am, this life, wandering from where I usually incarnate so that I can be a part of those who re-sow his annual seeds where he needs things to grow... And to know where to wander you must remember were you have been and therefore no longer are. To know where he needs me is to know where he has many, many people who have him connected to his Earth. I know Mongolia because I am sure when I am done this life I will make many appearances with him there again, but for now, I honour Tengri. I honour that place far across the land and sea. To the people there: You have all known my Lord well and meant the world to him and I can only hope that I become a fraction of that important to him, and I hope, if anything I ever do in any butterfly-effect way has any input and impact on those of you who know Tengri that it is at the very least a neutral one, but oh do I wish it would bring positive effects. The dream would be, in a world where that name is falling into the mouths of Nationalism, to bring some sort of balance back between the nature he is eternally a force in and us, the incarnated human race. The family of the Day is always going to be a distant and admired set of people in my eyes.

In this life, I am eternally called to working with the spirits of the sky and the weather. I am physical but I am also, when I leave my body, and even within it, always dancing with the sky and its people. The spirits of nature speak my mother tongue, I want to get back to learning how to communicate with them physically so I can continue my work for Tengri and help anchor him where I live now, and everything else that is my job that is for no one's ears but his and our families'. I want to keep walking between worlds, he helps me with my wolf form, my reptile and bird forms, helps me fly in the sky again as a dragon, to be a part of the choir of cells of weather spirits that sing for him when he grows closer; he shows me and teaches me to remember who exactly I am and what it means to be both human and spirit in one form. In these ways and parts of my practice, the name Tengri is more pertinent than that of Shiva - of course my main path is non-dual (- meets dual, paradox is important to me) Shaivist Tantra and awakening to my true self... But the act of communing with the spirits of nature around us and working with them... I will never know exactly what is done in Mongolia, but given that each name invokes a different side of the spirits we work with, invoking the Blue Sky Tengri... He taught me to reach for this energy of his for a reason.

When I speak of the Sky in an active way and in the way of crossing the borders between worlds and interacting with the weather, he approaches me steadfastly as Tengri, that name he blurs upwards from outside of me through the inside of me, he tells me to use it and mean it, to call on him like that. I am still new to this, I don't fully understand why and I never will given the infinite complexities of him that have splayed out over thousands and thousands of years, but especially now I do not know why this name in particular is to be used beyond what I have said. I don't know what people in Mongolia call on him for, but that is why I am learning. At the very least I understand the sky in many forms: When you need rain you do not call him blue sky you call him grey clouds, when you need him as a storm you call him storm. When I sit and talk advaita he is the same sky but he talks of himself as consciousness and god, Shiva, when I talk Day and weather, the heavens... I will call upon him as Tengri. Whatever the reason is for entrusting me with that name in my mouth he is my teacher, I follow him to the end as the rain follows the wind, as the thunder follows the lightning, singing whatever name in whatever song is needed to praise him and get his attention turned on to me.

#i am going to take getting Lonely Bird by Huun-Huur-Tu as I go to post this as a good sign bc... before i even knew he was associated #with any part of the world and not just in my head that song was my connection to him and Felt Like Him.#leviathan //#tengri //#~abyssal murmurs

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