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itsjuststardust · 2 months ago

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Heaven in Hiding - Chapter 14: Campfire Confessionals

Heaven in Hiding Masterlist

Chapter Summary: “Lesson one,” he began, walking to offer her his hand. Alaina looked up at him with a glare but accepted his hand. “Always be ready."

Word Count: 9,610

Author's Note/Chapter Warnings:

Back by popular demand—Rav! I was so excited to see how much y'all enjoyed Rav and Din’s backstory. He may pop up another time or two, but we have to weave some stories within stories within the big story, and it's all very timey-wimey. MINORS - DO NOT INTERACT - 18+ ONLY 🎵 Chapter soundtrack 🎵 ‘Arsonist’s Lullaby’ - Hozier

Chapter 14: Campfire Confessionals

Din Djarin hated it here.

Concordia, he growled.

Rav had stayed for a week to help him get situated in his brother’s home, and then he had just left.

“Sorry, kid,” Rav half-heartedly apologized. “My brother will take care of you. I’ll be back before you know it.”

Din had never felt so out of place before in his life.

Everything was cold and hard here. The people always wore armor, surrounding him in a sea of masked faces. With the exception of a handful of other Foundlings, he never saw anyone’s face. Rav’s brother, Kresh, had become Din’s sponsor in this bizarre world, and the man acted like a drill sergeant to the new addition to his clan. He forced him up in the morning when Din would rather stay in bed. The man sent him to school, where he learned about the history of Mandalorians and strange subjections like how to handle weapons properly and proper weapons maintenance. Some days, he was forced into small groups with what appeared to be a wide range of ages as they learned Mando'a. Even basic subjects, like math, were different. These Mandalorians took a more practical approach to teaching subjects, explaining how the building blocks of math and science would translate into flying ships and surviving on strange planets.

The worst part was when his sponsor’s son would return home from training with the fighting corps for a few days every couple of weeks. The son was another faceless metal person, and as the months went on, he made it clear he thought less of Din for not taking the Creed immediately upon arriving. Kresh made it clear that even if Din never took the Creed and become a Mandalorian, he would still have a place to stay with him until he was old enough to care for himself. Kresh's son made it clear that his views on the matter did not match his father's. It was so bad that Din would stay locked in his room when his ‘foster’ brother came home.

Unfortunately, his sponsor had sent his son and his foundling on an errand, and he could not avoid the young Mandalorian at this time.

Din ground his teeth as the boy, who was only two years older than him, spoke to him as if he were nothing more than a baby.

Din Djarin had enough.

Three months of pent-up rage exploded, and he lunged at the other boy, tackling him to the ground. The older boy was clearly taken by surprise because it took him a stunned moment to retaliate. For a boy who was training to be a Mandalorian warrior, he sure struggled against the smaller, inexperienced foundling.

He wasn’t sure how long the two of them struggled, rolling around on the ground, but what felt like seconds later, two sets of gloved hands pulled the fighting boys apart.

Din looked at his foster brother, who looked away from him, ashamed, in his father's arms. Din growled, lunging at him because it was unfair that the other boy still had his father. He didn’t make it very far before his body was pulled back against a solid wall of armor.

“Alright, alright,” a familiar voice grumbled behind him. “Calm down, kid.”

Din spun at the sound of the new voice and felt relief wash over him as he saw Rav standing in his familiar blue armor. Then, as if a switch flipped, that relief turned to anger, and he charged at the Mandalorian who’d saved him only to abandon him. With an angry yell, Din roughly shoved Rav in the man’s abdomen, forcing him a step away from him.

Rav gave him one shove and only one. The next time Din charged at him, the older man easily twisted out of the way. Rav grabbed Din and yanked his smaller body up by his chest so Din’s back was pressed against the older man’s chest, and his feet dangled off the ground.

“Are you done?” Rav questioned, and Din responded by kicking the man in the shin. “Alright then,” he grumbled when it was evident that his Foundling wasn’t done yet. Rav turned back to look at his brother, “I thought you said he just laid in bed all day?” he asked. Kresh just shrugged. “Come on, kid,” he said, walking away from the armored father and son, still carrying his foundling as they walked away from the scene of the fight.

With a sigh, Din sagged defeated into the man’s arms as he was carried out of the town toward the nearby open field. Once they made it down the hill, Rav finally let him go.

“You wanna talk about it?” Rav asked, and Din ground his teeth and clenched his fists at his sides. “Cause I’ve been getting communications for months from Kresh about you refusing to interact with anyone, and now you’re picking fights?”

Din did not want to talk about it. Din wanted to do something about it. He wanted to go home. He wanted to see his parents. But he couldn't do any of those things. No, Din Djarin was stuck on this Maker forsaken moon surrounded by a bunch of... well, they could be droids for all he knew. And the one person who he trusted left him to rot away here.

So. No. Din Djarin did not want to talk about it. Instead, he ran at the older Mandalorian, but Rav just shook his helmet before sweeping out a leg, knocking Din’s legs out from under him and knocking him flat on his back.

“Ow!” Din yelled.

“Feel like talking yet?” Rav asked, looking down at him.

He snarled at the blue Mandalorian and scrambled back up to his feet. “You left me!” he yelled his accusations at Rav before charging at the man again.

Once again, Rav kicked his foot out, knocking his legs out from under him again.

“I didn’t leave you, kid,” Rav said, shaking his helmet at him. “I told you that my life was no place for a kid. Kresh is the family man. He likes kids. He’s been worried about you.”

Din blinked at the blue helmet, staring down at him, “So if you don’t even like kids, why do you care about what I do?”

The older Mandalorian sighed frustratedly, “Don’t put words in my mouth, kid. It’s not that I don’t like you. Promise. My life right now… it’s too dangerous to have you tagging along.” Rav stared at him for a moment before offering him a hand, but when Din batted his hand away, the older man stood straight before saying, “Alright, if you wanna fight, then let’s fight it out.”

Din growled, scrambled up from the ground, and fixed the Mandalorian with a seething look.

Rav began to circle him, “Let’s see whatcha got.”

Din snarled and charged at Rav. When the Mandalorian struck out a foot, Din jumped to avoid it, smiling when he avoided being knocked on his ass again. Unfortunately, he was too caught up in his small victory that he missed the man sweeping out his other leg, and he ended up on his ass anyway.

“Stop that!” Din yelled, slamming his hands on the ground.

“I’ll stop it when you stop acting like an ass,” Rav challenged.

Anger flared in his chest, and he jumped up from the ground.

“There’s that fire!” Rav cheered and motioned with his hands to come at him again.

Din charged again.

And again.

He went after Rav with his feet, hands, and everything he had. Each time Rav dodged him and knocked him on his ass, he told him what he did wrong. Each time Din roared and got back up, Rav clapped and cheered for him.

They went on like that for another half an hour before Din was so tired and sore that he couldn’t get back up from the ground.

“Ya know, you’re alright for a runt of a thing from a backwater skughole like Aq Vetina,” Rav commented from a distance. “You should give my punk of a nephew a run for his money and join the fighting corps,” he suggested, stepping closer to him.

Din let his head fall to the ground, looked up at the sky, and thought of his parents.

Would his parents—a baker and a teacher—be disappointed to see their only son fighting? To see that their only son became a fighter? A soldier? A warrior? A Mandalorian?

The fighting corps, Din thought, finding it difficult to imagine. If you would have asked him three months ago, Din Djarin would have told you that he would be a pod racer when he grew up.

“A word of advice,” Rav began, crossing his arms over his chest. “Don’t let yourself get distracted. You need to have an eye on your surroundings at all times. Don’t let yourself get comfortable. The second you allow yourself to be comfortable, that’s when you get knocked on your ass—”

Rav was cut off when someone came up behind him and swept his feet out from under him, taking Rav to the ground.

“Case in point,” Rav grumbled, looking behind him to see his brother standing over him with his arms crossed over his chest.

“I’m tired of you beating up my foundling,” Kresh grumbled, walking around his younger brother to offer Din a hand up.

Din gave his sponsor an apologetic look before accepting the hand.

“Your foundling,” Rav challenged, rubbing his lower back as he got up.

Kresh nodded, “You left him with me, didn’t you?”

Din looked curiously between the brothers as they appeared to be having some kind of silent argument when Rav didn't respond immediately. This was the problem with all these people having their faces covered and wearing full body armor all the time. How was he supposed to tell if someone was angry or happy?

After another second of silence, Kresh continued, “Of course, you could give up the nomad life and come home. Then you could become his sponsor.”

Din lit up at the suggestion and turned his head to give Rav a hopeful look. Only Rav had become unnervingly still, and Din looked between the two brothers, not understanding why everything had become so tense.

“Funny,” Rav finally bit out, but his voice lacked his typical playful undertones. “The last time I suggested coming home, you were the one who told me I wasn’t welcome.”

A sigh left Kresh’s helmet, suggesting this wasn’t the first time they’d had this argument. Then the older brother finally replied, “It wasn’t you who wasn’t welcome.”

Rav held his helmet a little taller and straightened his shoulders, “Then I guess I’m still not welcome.”

“I guess not,” Kresh responded sadly, putting his arm over Din’s shoulder to lead him back to his home.

“Wait,” Din said, turning out of the older brother’s arm to run back to Rav. The other blue-armored Mandalorian relaxed and kneeled when Din approached him. “Will I see you again?” he asked.

Rav clapped his shoulder and gave him a nod. “Don’t worry, kid. Not even that mudscuffer can keep me away for too long. I promise not to wait three months this time.”

Din wrapped his arms around Rav’s neck, smiling when his savior returned the hug.

“Don’t let that fire flicker out, Din Djarin,” Rav whispered. "I know this is new, and you're confused, but Kresh and I just want what's best for you. Even if you don't take the Creed, we'll still be your family." Din nodded into his savior's neck. Rav squeezed him a little tighter. “Do what is best for you. Just promise me you'll keep fighting no matter what. You hear me?”

For the first time in three months, Din Djarin saw a light at the end of the dark tunnel he was in. Maybe the fighting corps wasn’t such a terrible idea after all.

“I don’t want it to seem like I’m complaining,” Alaina said, breaking Mando from his daydreams. “This place is beautiful and all, but I thought you said you would start training me today.”

Mando sighed, “Just trying to figure out where to begin.”

After watching the sunset over the emerald green lake yesterday, Mando escorted his companions back to the Razor Crest for the evening. A tiny spark seemed to have returned to Alaina after her time at the lake. The spark flickered when they returned to the Crest when she saw the site of her attack, and he rubbed his glove up and down her spine, hoping to help ward off the no doubt ugly memories that were playing in her head. Exhausted, Alaina walked past her cot, crawled back into his normal sleeping alcove, and fell asleep instantaneously.

Mando looked between her cot and the spot where he killed that mudscuffer and realized that it was only a couple of paces away. He sighed and looked at Alaina, who was already asleep in the alcove. He would have to figure out a way to make her comfortable in the hold again, but he hadn’t slept much since Alaina had her breakdown after she’d finally woken up, and well… that problem would just have to be left until tomorrow.

The three of them slept in this morning, and Mando was still smiling at waking up to Alaina fast asleep with an arm and a leg sprawled over him and the kid drooling on his shoulder.

There were worse ways to wake up.

Alaina and the kid slept in just long enough for him to shower and have a cup of instant caf in the cockpit before they woke up chomping at the bit. Alaina was eager to begin her training, and Grogu was eager to explore.

“The basics are usually a good starting place,” Alaina commented, giving a couple of mock jabs to his chestpiece.

Mando tilted his helmet and grabbed her wrist, moving her thumb out from under her fingers to lay it on the outside of her fingers under her knuckles.

“See,” Alaina nodded. “Basics.”

He sighed again as a streak of green ran past them. He needed a leash for the kid.

“Grogu,” Mando called, and the womp rat immediately stopped and turned around, not used to the Mandalorian calling him by his actual name. Mando reached into his pocket and held the much sought-after silver ball for the kid to see. Grogu’s mouth dropped, and he ran as fast as his small, squat legs could carry him. “You can play with it, but you can’t leave the clearing,” he instructed, dropping the ball to the ground.

The kid went to Alaina and tugged on her pant leg to get her attention to show her the ball.

“I see that!” Alaina responded with a bright smile that brought out matching smiles from him and the kid. She leaned down and rested her hands on her knees as she looked at the kid. “Now, can you say Mando’s a sucker?” she asked the kid with a snicker.

Grogu blinked, and Mando cocked his helmet and, without warning, kicked his leg out, swiping it at Alaina’s legs, knocking the blonde off her feet and on her ass.

“Hey!” she wailed. “That’s not fair! I wasn’t ready!”

“Lesson one,” he began, walking to offer her his hand. Alaina looked up at him with a glare but accepted his hand. “Always be ready,” he finished, letting go of Alaina’s hand so she fell back to the ground.

“Ass!” she accused, and Mando chuckled at her dramatics.

“I think we’ll start with hand-to-hand combat,” he suggested, walking a few steps away from Alaina.

He started dismantling his armor and piling it on the ramp out of the dirt.

“Why are you taking your armor off?” Alaina questioned him as she brushed the dirt off her clothes. “I thought we were doing hand-to-hand combat?”

“We are,” he confirmed, pulling his bandolier over his shoulder. “It’s so you don’t break your wrist when you try and hit me.”

She fiddled nervously with the end of her braid before saying, “I don’t want you to go easy on me.”

Mando cocked his helmet, “Who said I was going to go easy on you?” Alaina smirked at his answer. “We will focus primarily on hand-to-hand, but we’ll work on weapons some too. You picked up quickly on a lot of steps working Dune, but you can’t think of everything as choreography. If you find yourself in another fight, the person you’re fighting with won’t be doing the same routine as you.”

“We call that improv,” Alaina said, giving him a wobbly spin on the toe of her boot.

Mando nodded. He took in the woman in front of him with a trained eye. It was different to see her in a tight black shirt and pants instead of her usual dresses, but the new wardrobe seemed to fit her. She’d done her golden hair in a braid, and with her combat boots, she looked the image of a fighter.

Hopefully, she would be by the time he was done with her.

There was only one problem. He knew where he wanted to begin…

“What?” Alaina asked, tilting her head curiously, apparently sensing his hesitation.

Mando sighed, “You know I would never intentionally hurt you, right?”

Alaina treated him with a soft smile and closed the distance between them. “I am not so naïve to think that I won’t get out of this without some bumps and bruises, Mando,” she told him when she reached him. “But I know you would never hurt me,” she finished, placing her hand in the middle of his chest.

Her words shocked him; he was not used to hearing Alaina admit that. He nodded, loosely looping his fingers around her wrist and running his gloved fingers along the underside of her wrist. “I want to start by teaching you how to get out of different holds,” came his hesitant words.

It took Alaina a second to understand why he was so hesitant, but the moment they were on the same page, she sunk in on herself. Mando gripped her wrist tighter and tugged her a little closer to him.

“If I do anything that makes you uncomfortable, tell me to stop, and we’ll stop,” he continued quietly. “I won’t hurt you,” he whispered.

“I know,” she answered quietly, her emerald eyes looking away from him to the ground. “I just kind of thought we’d start with the punching and the kicking.”

“Based on how hard you kick in your sleep, you’ll pick up on the kicking rather quickly. I still think you were a Trandoshan kickboxer in a previous life,” Alaina rolled her eyes at his comment but finally looked back up at him. “But this is important. You don’t want to feel helpless? Learning to get yourself out of various restraints is where we start.”

She took a deep breath in through her nose but nodded.

Mando rubbed his thumb along her wrist while he continued to observe her for any sign of hesitation, but Alaina’s green eyes remained steadfast in her decision, so he nodded and grabbed her other hand.

“Lesson two,” he began, gripping her wrists tighter. “Don’t get in your opponent's space.” Alaina narrowed her eyes at him at his words, but he didn’t miss the smirk on her lips. “Any opponent you come across will take one look at you and think they’ve already won. Your biggest weapon is going to be the element of surprise. What is your first instinct if someone has you by the wrists like this?”

“To try and pull away,” she said quickly, giving a weak yank of her wrists to try and get him out of his grip. “Or kick them.”

“They’ll be expecting you to pull away,” Mando told her, shaking his helmet at her. “You might be able to buy a few seconds with a well-placed kick, but they’ll likely be anticipating you using your legs. Instead, go with the momentum,” he instructed, pulling her by her wrists as he began to walk backward in the clearing. “They will already be bringing you closer; use that to your advantage. They’ll expect you to pull or kick; instead, go with what you can reach,” he explained and stopped to yank her closer to demonstrate. “Go for the neck,” he said, bringing her hands up to where his vocal box was hiding under his cowl. “Or the chin, or the nose,” he continued, bringing the heel of Alaina’s hand up to the underside of his helmet before dragging it up the front of the helmet where his nose would be.

“And what happens when the person I’m fighting is wearing head-to-toe beskar?” she asked with a quirk of her eyebrow.

“Then you have bigger problems on your hands,” he deadpanned. Alaina stuck her tongue out at him, and he pulled on her wrists again. “Come on,” he ordered.

They spent the next few hours with Mando showing her the motions. He had her run through some mock punches to his neck and head before he let her take a crack at him. Alaina struggled at first without his direction, but eventually, she came into her own. She tried different approaches to her attack, learning different ways to feint, when to move with him, and when to strike.

As Alaina adapted, Mando did too.

He started twisting out of her reach, pulling on her arms, trying to throw her off her balance, and charging toward her. If Alaina didn’t figure out what he was trying to show her the first time, he would repeat the motions over and over until she figured it out. Mando slowly taught her to learn her own choreography without explicitly spelling it out, teaching her to improvise as he slowly added more and more steps to their dance.

Two, almost three hours into their training, he could feel Alaina’s steps progressively getting slower. What they were doing wasn’t particularly physical, but between the sun and the continuous moving, it was enough to tire anyone, much less someone who had wasted away as a lab rat for the last five years.

Ready to call their first session, the next time she moved with him, he took her by her wrists and spun her so she faced away from him, crossing her arms over her chest before yanking her back against his chest so her boots dangled above the ground. Alaina growled at the new position, and when she struggled in his arms, he tightened his hold over her chest, silently telling her that was the wrong move.

“Think it through,” he murmured when she finally relaxed in his arms.

“Nose,” she panted, gently tapping the back of her head against his helmet where his nose would be.

He hummed in agreement, “And?”

She stilled as she thought through her actions and then sucked in a deep breath through her nose before snapping her right boot back into his knee.

Mando grunted and let her fall to the ground. “Good,” he praised her, squeezing her shoulder.

“Ugh,” Alaina blew out and collapsed dramatically to the ground, splaying her body out. “I’m out of shape,” she panted.

Mando chuckled and gave her boot a gentle tap with his own. “You’ll get there,” he told her, fully believing it. She was a quick study. In time, she had the potential to be a formidable opponent. “The best way to get there is to keep going, even when you’re tired.” Alaina lifted her head off the ground to give him a bewildered look. “One lap around the lake,” he instructed, nodding to the nearby green waters.

“You’ve got to be kidding me?” Alaina asked with wide eyes.

He tilted his head at her question. “You started running with Dune back on Sorgan,” he reminded her. “Keep it up. It will help with your endurance.”

Alaina’s head fell back to the ground. “Why couldn’t we have started with running?” she asked him, exasperated.

“Don’t want you tired and trying to learn. Besides, it’s good to finish with a run to push yourself when you’re tired. It will make the difference between winning or losing,” he replied. When Alaina refused to get up off the ground, Mando gave her boot another kick. “Better get going,” he told her. “Don’t want to be out too late. The wolves start to come out at dusk.”

Wide emerald eyes stared back up at him, “Seriously?”

“Make it back before dusk, and you won’t have to find out,” he smirked and walked to the ramp of the Crest to sit at the top. The kid was at the foot of the ramp, playing with the ball. Alaina grumbled as she made her way to her feet, giving him one last pouting look, intentionally giving him sad puppy dog eyes. Mando just shooed her with his hand to get a move on as he began to disassemble his rifle. With one final roll of her eyes, Alaina headed to the lake.

“Alaina!” Mando called after her, and she turned back to give him a hopeful look. He reached behind his back, found the canteen of water and a couple of protein bars he’d set aside earlier, and tossed them to her. She caught them and looked between her rations and him. He only smirked when Alaina spun and stomped into the lavender field.

Grogu tossed the ball up the ramp and clapped when it rolled back down to him. When the kid gave him a toothy grin, Mando just pointed at him.

“Careful, or you’re next,” he teased, earning him a spitting noise from the toddler.

Mando spent the afternoon cleaning his weapons and watching the kid go from the ball to chasing a beetle to finally taking a nap.

When Alaina made it out of even his visor's advanced range, he went up to the cockpit to monitor her as she made it to the farthest part of the lake from them. Satisfied with her progress, Mando grabbed the kid and headed into the woods to see what he could hunt for dinner.

Just shy of six hours from when she left, Alaina came trudging through the lavender grass back to their clearing, drenched in sweat and breathless.

The first thing she did was flip him a vulgar hand gesture before she stomped up the ramp and headed straight to the fresher without saying a word to him.

With a chuckle, Mando worked on building a fire to start roasting dinner. A short walk from the ramp, there was a downed tree trunk, which made a good bench. Now that he knew where to build the fire, he gathered smaller limbs, rocks, and other debris to get the fire going. He grinned as he watched the womp rat follow him, copying his actions and grabbing twigs and leaves to add to the fire.

“You need kindling,” he explained, showing Grogu how to prod at the dry leaves and grass under the logs and larger sticks he had stacked. He knelt low to the ground to get as close to the kid’s level as possible and stretched his left arm out. “Now, press this button,” he instructed, pointing to the top button on his vambrace. The kid hovered his tiny clawed finger over the button and looked up at his helmet. Mando nodded, “One short press, ad’ika.”

Grogu’s finger pressed down on the button and jumped in surprise when a flame shot out from Mando’s wrist, sparking the dried plant material. He smiled as the leaves and grass caught fire, eating up the flames quickly until only embers were left. Mando smirked when the kid’s ears drooped in disappointment.

“It’s okay,” Mando reassured him, giving the kid a gentle pat on his back. “That happens. Give it time. Sometimes, you need to give it a little air.” Grogu cocked his head at him. Maybe Alaina was right, and the kid did understand more than he thought. He pointed to the fire and leaned down, turning his head away from the kid to tilt the beskar piece up just enough to blow at the embers, bringing them back to life. When he moved back to look at the kid, he just looked at him with his large bug eyes and stared between him and the fire. “Go on,” he encouraged. “You try.”

The kid got close to the low burning flames and huffed a tiny breath, bringing the flames a little higher.

“Good job,” he nodded, pulling the kid by his shirt away from the fire. “Now it just needs time.”

“Careful, Grogu,” Alaina warned.

Mando turned his head at the sound of her voice, and a flash of purple caught his eye. Alaina was tenderly limping down the Crest’s ramp, and he instinctively sucked in a breath at the sight. Dressed in a light purple dress that struck just above her knees, Alaina seemed to float as she walked barefoot down the ramp. Even her damp blonde hair reflected the colors around her as she grew closer to their campfire. Mesh'la.

“Mando will just reward your accomplishments with unwanted physical labor,” she teased the toddler when she joined them at the fire.

With a smirk, Mando went about preparing the rabbit he’d caught earlier while watching the child enamored by the ever-growing fire.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to walk tomorrow,” she groused as she flopped to sit on the downed tree trunk.

“Working through it helps,” he responded, placing chunks of rabbit on skewers over the fire.

“You say that as if I’ll be able to move in the morning,” she grumbled, stretching her bare feet to warm them by the fire.

Mando was about to discuss tomorrow’s training with Alaina while they waited for dinner to finish cooking. Before he could begin, he watched the kid levitate the silver ball into the air just over his head before letting it fall to the ground. He looked to Alaina to comment on the kid’s magic powers but stopped when he saw the hurt look that had taken over her face.

“I want to be able to do that again,” she murmured sadly without looking at him.

Pain flared in his chest. He could help train her physically, but he wouldn’t be helpful regarding whatever sorcery possessed her and the Child. Mando watched Alaina from the corner of his eye as he recalled the unfortunate events on Tatooine—How Calican had a dazed, vacant expression, and Alaina had a nosebleed that he’d come to associate with her using her attempting to use her powers or after visions…

“On Tatooine,” he began, keeping his voice low and calm. Alaina’s eyes flicked from the floating ball to his helmet, and he could already see pain flooding her emerald eyes. “When I pulled Calican off of you… Were you trying to use your powers to throw him off of you?”

Alaina’s face paled at the question, and her eyes dropped from his helmet to stare at the fire.

“You don’t have to talk about it,” he murmured, going back to grilling dinner. He should have known better than to bring up the incident so soon.

“I was using my powers,” she whispered, and her response surprised him. “I tried to use my powers to throw him before… before…” she tried to start and bit down on her lip. “I’m sorry,” she rasped.

“It’s okay,” he murmured, pulling the skewers off the fire and passing one each to Grogu and Alaina before sitting next to her on the black tree trunk. “You don’t have to talk about it.”

Alaina just shook her head and breathed deeply through her nose before continuing. “I haven’t been completely upfront with you about everything the Empire did to me,” she began, keeping her eyes on the skewer in her hands. “I didn’t want you to…” she faded off.

Mando reached over to wipe a tear from her cheek. “You can tell me whatever you’re comfortable telling me,” he murmured, resting his hand on her thigh.

She nodded and turned to look at him with a remorseful expression. “You know how whatever they did to me kind of left me with premonitions, or whatever you want to call them?” He nodded. “They were successful in giving me one other power,” she whispered and turned to look away from him. “But before I tell you, I want you to know that I swear, I’ve never done this to you.”

He squeezed her thigh, “I believe you.”

Alaina took a deep breath and grabbed his gloved one resting on her thigh for support. “I—I—Um, I'm not sure where to begin," she muttered, nervously pulling her bottom lip between her teeth.

"The basics are usually a good starting place," he teased, copying her words from earlier in the day.

Her lips quirked at his words, but the moment didn't last long before a deep frown returned to her face. "You have to understand... You have to understand that I did it to save myself, and... and I couldn't take his abuse any longer. I—He was going to kill me," she rasped. "It maybe wouldn't have been that night, but I just knew he was going to kill me."

“Who?” he whispered darkly, tightening his grip on her thigh.

“General Graven,” Alaina answered, voice barely above a whisper. “He was in charge of the main lab in the lava flats. He was an angry man. He used to torture me after I would inevitably fail whatever task Penn had me attempt.” Mando let go of her leg to wrap an arm around her shoulder to pull her into his side. “I thought he was going to kill me that night. He was strangling me, and Penn tried to save me, but the General was too strong. Eventually, he let me go, and I couldn’t do it anymore. Instinct just took over. I walked up to Graven, placed my hand on his cheek, and told him to walk in a straight line without stopping.”

Mando frowned, confused as to why Alaina was so worked up. “That’s it?” he asked her, trying to understand.

Alaina shook her head, “You see, they tinkered around inside of my head. When they tried to get me to predict the future the first time, I had a seizure during their tests and apparently almost died.”

Alaina picked at some unseen piece of lint or thread on her dress for a moment, and he gave her time to gather her thoughts. “When I eventually recovered from that, and Pershing deemed it safe to begin testing again, they tried to get me to read people’s minds. He wanted to know someone’s deepest, darkest thoughts. He wanted to know what people were thinking and what they were planning. The best I could do was pick up on someone’s emotions,” she shrugged. “He locked me away in a sensory deprivation room with a flask of water, a single protein bar, and a bucket and told me he wouldn’t let me out until I could read his thoughts. I was trapped in that room for what felt like an eternity.”

Mando's arm clenched around her shoulder at Alaina’s retelling of the terrible things that had happened to her and the terrible things Alaina had been forced to endure at the hands of the Empire. He wanted to shoot something. He wanted to shoot someone. Pershing. Graven. Whoever he was in her story. Every Imp in the sky. He wanted them to burn for what they’d done to Alaina.

“After all was said and done, I could do one point five things out of the three he wanted from me, and I lost everything I could do before. I couldn’t move anything with my mind when Pershing went to test me. Everything I could do before… It was just gone.”

He frowned at the one-and-a-half things she could do that she couldn’t do before because Alaina had made it sound like she failed…

She turned from his embrace, and a small, terrifying smile spread across her face. Mando flexed his hands as he felt the hairs on the back of his neck, remembering this same look from one of her visions. Only this time, her eyes didn’t take the vacant look that came with her visions. They stayed sharp.

“I was able to do one thing, though,” she started quietly. “General Graven,” she sneered, “liked to pick on me. He liked to hit me, and with my original powers gone, I couldn’t do anything to stop him. That night, we were at the main facility on Nevarro, and they were testing my ability to coerce people. The idea was that I could walk into a room and just whisper an order into someone's ear, and they would do whatever I told them. Like the other tests, it wasn’t going great, and the more tame methods they used as punishment weren’t working, so Graven rolled up his sleeves and went to work.”

“Alaina, you don’t have to—”

“I want to,” she nodded. “I want you to know what was taken from me. I want you to know the kind of person they made me. Because that night… That night changed me. The lab had a private hangar built into the side of the mountain,” she explained. “It’s how we came and went… Mando, I—” She cut herself up to look at his helmet. This close, he could see the distress radiating off of her, and he was about to tell her she didn’t have to continue when she continued. “Mando, I can make people do things,” she began shakily. “With my words,” she elaborated. “I first did it on Nevarro to Graven. I did it to save myself,” she told him, looking at him with pleading eyes. "I told him to walk without stopping. He—He marched off the edge of the hangar—I killed a man with just my words.”

Lightning cracked over the sky. “My—my name is Alaina,” she stuttered. “I’m a dancer. I just want to be a dancer. I’ve never stolen from anyone or hurt anyone.”

His heart broke for the woman sitting next to him. Oh, Alaina.

“They were a little scared of me after that,” Alaina shrugged. “That earned me the collar," she whispered, flicking her eyes down to her lap.

Was that even possible? To force someone to do something—to kill themselves with just a thought?

“So, Mandalorian,” Alaina continued softly, and her emerald eyes returned to his helmet. “Are you scared of me yet?”

Silence stretched between them as he studied her. Scared of her? No. Angry for her? Yes.

“The only thing about you that scares me is your piloting skills," he finally said, gently squeezing her thigh.

Alaina's face softened. “Do you hate me?” she whispered, ducking her head away from him as if she was scared to learn the answer.

“No,” he said quickly, taking his hand to force her head back up to his helmet. “I’m the last person who should judge someone because they took a life,” he tried to lighten the mood with a joke, but Alaina just stared back at him with hurt-filled eyes. “Alaina, you did what you needed to do to defend yourself. That’s what you were going to do to Calican?” he asked, connecting the dots.

She nodded, “But Mando, I promise I’ve never forced you to do anything… At least, I don’t think I have, and if I did, it wasn’t intentional! You have to believe me!”

Mando shook his head, not understanding why Alaina was panicking so much—

Sorgan.

Their one lust-filled night together. It almost seemed as if that night was a lifetime ago.

“Tranyc,” he whispered, gently resting his forehead against Alaina’s. Her large, emerald eyes stared directly into his soul, and he squeezed her hand. “You have not forced me to do anything I did not want to do, sweet thing,” he whispered. Relief flooded her green orbs, and he smiled.

He set his skewer in his lap and, with one hand, pulled Alaina closer to him and, with the other, tilted his helmet up just enough to kiss her cheek. When he righted himself and dropped his helm back to cover his face, he couldn’t help but smile at the bright blush that popped up across Alaina’s cheeks.

“Thank you,” she whispered, leaning over to peck his helmet's middle with her lips.

He smirked and handed her the skewer in her lap, nodding for her to eat before he turned slightly so he could take bites of food from under his helmet.

The three ate silently, Alaina and Grogu turning slightly away to give him more privacy. At one point, Alaina had to stop the kid from eating the skewer itself after he got his last bite of rabbit.

“Here,” Alaina said, offering Grogu a chunk of hers.

“Stop that,” Mando told her, shaking his helmet at the kid who’d already devoured the bite.

“What? He’s hungry.”

“He didn’t hike thirty-something kilometers today,” Mando argued, giving her his last piece of rabbit. Alaina tried to beg him off, but he put the chunk of meat on her skewer, not taking no for an answer. “And he’s a bottomless pit. He’s always hungry.”

Alaina just rolled her eyes but didn’t argue with him. When Grogu realized he wouldn’t get any more food from his blonde friend, he returned to playing with his ball.

“Thank you for bringing us here,” Alaina said, returning to eating her food. “It’s so beautiful here. It was the only thing that made the hike around the lake tolerable. And that water! Have you ever seen water that was green?” she asked, looking at him in wonder.

Mando chuckled and was about to tell her about another planet he’d visited with a purple sea when a distant howling noise made him pause.

Alaina’s mouth dropped, and she stared back at him with an affronted expression. “There are wolves here!” she said, shoving his shoulder. “You ass! I could have been eaten by a wolf today!”

He laughed and looked down to check on the kid, only to find that he’d passed out between them and was using Alaina’s foot as a pillow. “I told you there were,” he teased, bumping her shoulder with his before he bent down to pick the kid up. “You were never in any real danger. They only come out at night,” he reminded her as he stood up to take the kid back to the ship.

“Oh sure, leave me out here alone to get eaten,” Alaina grumbled, taking an angry bite.

Mando gave her head a playful push before returning to the ship with the sleeping toddler.

He quietly crept through the hold, placed the kid in his hammock, and covered him with his tiny blanket before returning to sit with Alaina in front of the fire.

He stopped at one of the crates tied to the hold. He looked from the crate to Alaina by the fire and then back to the crate to open it. He rummaged through the various other items before finding what he was looking for tucked away at the bottom of the crate. He wrapped his hand around the glass neck, pulled out a bottle of whiskey he rarely consumed, and brought the bottle back to the fire.

When he returned to Alaina, he retook the same spot on the log, not quite close enough to touch her but close enough to be in her personal space. He passed the bottle to her, and she raised her eyebrows in surprise at him. He nodded to the bottle, and she finally accepted the amber liquor with a shrug. She took a deep swig from it before passing it back to him. He couldn’t stop his smirk when he saw Alaina grimace at the taste of the whiskey. Mando turned his head away from her and lifted his helmet enough to take a sip from the bottle.

He moved to pass the bottle back to her but was surprised to see her staring back at him. “What?” he asked her, shaking the bottle until Alaina took it from him.

Alaina pointed to his helmet, “Does it bother you that you have to wear that all the time?” she asked him, taking a sip from the bottle.

Mando shook his head in response, “This is the way.”

Alaina took another sip from the bottle at his answer. “When’s the last time anyone ever saw your face?”

Mando tilted his head curiously at her and let out a little sigh. “I don’t know, I was maybe ten?”

Alaina passed the bottle back to him at his answer. “Is that when your people take your Creed you talked about?”

Mando paused and swirled the bottle of whiskey in his hands. They hadn’t spoken much of his Creed other than briefly explaining to Alaina in the middle of the night that he couldn’t remove his helmet in front of others. Curious green eyes stared back at him, and he turned to take a deep drag from the bottle before he answered her. “The Creed is taken by anyone old enough to speak the words. I was older than most kids my age who had taken the creed several years before me.”

Alaina tilted her head in confusion, “What made you wait so long?”

“I wasn’t born a Mandalorian,” he paused. “I was a Foundling.”

“Foundling?” she asked, and her forehead scrunched in confusion at his words.

Mando nodded. “Foundlings are considered no less Mandalorian than those born on Mandalore or Concordia, which is one of Mandalore’s moons. That’s where I was raised. My home… my home was destroyed by droids. My parents only just managed to hide me in a bunker before they were killed. If it weren’t for the Mandalorians, I’d be dead.”

“I’m sorry,” Alaina whispered.

Mando shrugged and turned from her to lift his helmet and took another swig from the whiskey bottle.

“I can’t imagine what that must have been like for you. I mean, I never knew my dad, but I couldn’t imagine losing my mom, too, at such a young age. And then to just be taken from your home to be raised by strangers with an entirely different culture… I just… that’s a lot, especially for someone so young.”

Mando shrugged again. “It was a lot at first, but the Mandalorians who took me in were kind. The one who saved me from the bunker arranged for his brother to take me in. He already had a son who was a few years older than me and the space. They were one of the older families on the moon, so I got a crash course in all things Mandalorian. I took the Creed almost a year later.”

Soft green eyes stared back at him. “Do you ever regret it?” she asked.

“No,” Mando answered easily with a shake of his head. “I can’t imagine it another way. I am a Mandalorian,” he told her, and Alaina smiled at the easy way he spoke with her. “The Mandalorians who took me in treated me as a son. Even the Mandalorian who found me returned to watch the ceremony when I took the Creed. He gave me one of his shoulder pauldrons the last time I saw him. I wore it to remember how it all started up until recently. It’s tucked away with my old set of armor in one of the crates on the Crest. Your blaster is his, too.”

Alaina smiled, “Resilient and sentimental.”

Mando shrugged and passed the bottle back to her.

“It’s okay. I’m a bit sentimental, too,” Alaina whispered, taking the bottle back from him for a drink. “Obviously, I have my mom’s dagger, but only because that was easy to carry when I fled. I packed a whole trunk of things and gave it to our neighbor, who we’d lived across from for as long as I can remember. I knew Pershing would come looking for me, and I just couldn’t stand the thought of some of that stuff getting taken or destroyed. It’s just mainly some clothes and pictures. It’s a lot of my mom’s things, some of which were sentimental to her from when she lived on Naboo,” she shrugged and took another sip of whiskey. “I think it’s okay to be sentimental.”

Mando studied her momentarily as the beginnings of an idea began to form, and Alaina took another sip from the bottle to avoid his intense scrutiny in the firelight. “Do you want to go get it?” he asked.

Alaina blinked at the question. A thousand feelings seemed to have come over her, and he waited patiently for her to find her words. “I—I don’t know,” came her whispered answer. “I mean, of course, I would love to have it again, but life is… a little too unpredictable right now,” she smiled.

“We could still go get it.”

Alaina’s smile softened, “Maybe someday. For now, I know it is safe. If we went and got it now and something happened to it, I would be more upset. Besides, there isn’t much room in your ship—”

“There’s room for a trunk,” he countered.

“Maybe someday,” Alaina whispered.

Mando nodded in understanding. Sometimes, even memories of happier times were almost too painful to be reminded of. “Whenever you��re ready,” he finally settled on, giving her another nod.

Alaina continued to study the Mandalorian sitting next to her, taking another drink from the whiskey bottle before passing it back to him. Mando took the bottle from her and immediately turned to shield his face to take another drink.

“I was thinking... I still want to continue our training, but I think I could train Grogu, too,” she offered, nervously biting her bottom lip. He cocked his head at the suggestion, and she continued. “He has powers, and he's just a kid. He should learn to use them. Properly. I still remember the training my mom gave me when I was little to help me learn my powers. There’s a lot of meditation, which is a little boring, but there are other lessons that aren’t quite so boring. And who knows,” she stopped to shrug, and he watched as hope flashed in her eyes. “Maybe I can relearn some of what I lost by starting from the beginning.”

He nodded and squeezed her thigh, “I think that is a great idea.”

Alaina smiled brightly at him, but the smile faded almost instantaneously like before. “Mando, I need to thank you for Tatooine and that guy…” she started nervously, looking down at her hands. “If you hadn't shown up when you did…”

He shook his head to stop her from trying to thank him for something he should have prevented, “It’s fine—”

“No, it’s not,” Alaina sighed. “I’ve never… I mean—” she cut herself off and shook her head. “This is embarrassing… I’ve never… been… intimate with someone else before… you.”

Mando’s breath caught in his chest at that bit of information, and he could only silently pass the bottle back to her. And then, bright anger flashed in his chest once he could process what she told him.

“I want it to be you,” she’d told him that night. “I want it to be with someone who thinks I’m beautiful and that I… trust.”

She trusted him to be her first. He’d been her first, and he could think of a multitude of things he could have done differently—

“Don’t make it weird,” she told him, bumping her shoulder into his. Alaina took a deep swig from the bottle. “I should also warn you that, except for Sorgan, I haven’t had any alcohol in five years,” she said, taking another long drag from the whiskey bottle.

Mando chuckled and pulled the bottle from her grasp after her admission.

“You’re no fun,” she pouted, and he playfully bumped his shoulder into hers. “Hey, what’s your name?” she asked.

Mando stayed quiet. He looked at her, and her green eyes were slightly glazed over from the alcohol. “My name…” he began but tapered off, unsure how to explain it to her. “It’s kind of like wearing the helmet. The anonymity protects us. No one outside of my tribe knows my name.”

Alaina shook her head at his answer, "We're so different, you and I," she murmured. "Only your family, your tribe," she corrected, "can know your name... You're expected to hide your face and identity at all times... Whereas I was literally taught and encouraged to display my emotions through dancing. Even my name was known in my small little pocket of the galaxy... If someone would have told me five years ago that we'd be here..." she stopped to shake her head in mock disbelief.

Mando chuckled, nodding in understanding at what she was trying to say. He took a swig from the bottle. He could still remember sitting in the rafters of the performance center, watching her dance. People sat below them, dressed in fine clothes, enjoying their night out, as the demure, blonde ballerina took them on a story with her dancing. He could still remember how difficult it was for him to leave his hiding spot to go after his quarry because, surely, someone that beautiful and pure couldn't have a bounty on her.

That was the last time he ignored his gut regarding bounty hunting.

“I don't want to seem disrespectful because you've done so much for me, even when I didn't realize you were... I just wish I could call you something other than Mando,” she said with a soft shrug but didn’t appear disappointed in his answer. Just like him telling her he couldn’t remove his helmet, she didn’t complain or argue (much) when he didn’t offer his proper name.

They stared at one another, and he felt that strange feeling in his chest. He knew that the tribe still held their strict values, especially now that they were in hiding... but he felt that same kinship with Alaina and the kid. Would it be the end of the world to share that private piece of himself with her? Would she understand the significance of him to give her his name? Would she understand that by giving her his name, he acknowledged that she was a member of his tribe? Of his family? Or would it just make things more painful when Alaina and the kid came to their senses and decided that this lifestyle was not for them and told him it was time to leave?

Alaina cocked her head at his sudden silence, and he turned to take another drink. There had been enough heavy words spoken tonight. He didn't need to weigh her down any more than she already was with her own problems.

“Didn’t say you had to call me Mando,” he finally said when he turned back to her.

Alaina rolled her eyes and snatched the whiskey bottle back from him. “Okay, fine, your language…”

“Mando’a,” he supplied.

She took a drink from the bottle. “Mando’a, right,” she nodded. “What’s the word for friend?”

“Is that what we are?” he questioned, taking the bottle back from her.

He couldn’t explain the feeling of… anxiety… anticipation… dread… that took hold of his chest while he waited for her answer. So much for keeping the evening light.

She just gave him a confused blink before she shrugged her shoulders and asked, “Aren’t we?”

He didn’t know how to answer that. So much had transpired between the two of them that the simple description of friends didn’t seem to completely encapsulate what they were to each other.

“Mando?” she questioned quietly, and he hummed in answer, still lost in his own thoughts. “I was gonna walk away and leave you to brood, but I don’t think my legs work anymore.”

He barked a deep, genuine laugh and shook his head when he saw Alaina hold her arms out for him to help her up. He chuckled as he swooped to pick her up so he could carry her back to the Crest. “Come on, Tranyc,” he murmured as he situated one arm under her knees and another behind her back to cradle her to his chest.

Alaina loosely wrapped her arms around his neck and rested her head on his shoulder. “You never told me what that means,” she murmured.

Maybe it was too soon to give her his name, but he could give her this.

“The literal translation is star-burned but is also interchangeable with the word sunny,” he began as he slowed as they approached the ramp leading up to the hold.

Alaina snorted. “So you call me that because of my sunny disposition?” she snarked.

Mando stopped at the foot of the ramp to give Alaina a serious look before saying, “No,” he said quietly, and Alaina’s face turned confused at the change in his demeanor. “I call you that because you are the sunlight. Despite everything you’ve been through, it would be understandable for you to fade away into the dark and let it change you… A lesser person would have broken a long time ago. But you?” he stopped to shake his head.

Alaina looked up at his helmet with tears, and he pulled her a little closer to his chest, gently pressing his helmet into her forehead.

“You are the sunlight, Alaina.”

Author's Note #2: ... Did anyone else hear that? I *swear* I heard the smut monster's cage rattle…

Tag list: @racheldon @zenrobbins0021

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Heaven in Hiding Masterlist

Next Chapter in series - Chapter 15: Seas of Green

#heaven in hiding #fanfic #it's a novel #minors dni #the mandalorian fanfiction #the mandalorian fanfic #mandalorian fanfic #wip #wip wednesday #no beta we die like men #the mandalorian #din djarin #original female character #grogu #original force sensitive character #the mandalorian/original female character #din djarin/original female character #star wars #star wars fanfiction

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officialleotolstoy · 4 years ago

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Oh Anatole Brainrot* We’re Really In It Now, aka Anatole playlist annotations!

*I only have brainrot about him in terms of his relationships with Hélène and Dolokhov idc about him on his own 🤢

This playlist is infuriating because it has so many good songs on it and he does NOT deserve to have a playlist that slaps so hard :/

My Type - Saint Motel

“You’re just my type; you’ve got a pulse and you are breathing”

The lyrics are literally just I Will Have Sex With Anything That Breathes which is Anatole’s only personality trait. It just is.

Fool For Love - Lord Huron

“I’m asking her to be my bride, I know there’s another man but he ain’t gonna delay my plans”

This song is about eloping with a girl who already has a boyfriend, it is THE Comet section Anatole song. Which angers me because it’s such a good song, it doesn’t deserve to be associated with him in my head.

The Cult of Dionysus - The Orion Experience

“Wine and women and wonderful vices”

HEDONISM BABEY!!! Also the phrase “wine and women” with “he spends his money on women and wine” in Comet...makes ya think.

Everybody Loves Me - OneRepublic

“Look so good I might die, all I know is everybody loves me”

You know that quote that’s like “[Anatole] cultivated an air of superiority blah blah blah whatever” (paraphrased)? This is that in song form.

Bedroom Hymns - Florence + The Machine

“The wine and the women and the bedroom hymns”

Thottery AND the phrase “wine and women”? Anatolecore.

Talk - Hozier

“I’ll try to talk refined for fear that you find out how I’m imagining you”

I think if he needs to, Anatole can sugarcoat carnal desire with pretty words. It kind of comes down to “I’m pretending to be eloquently and romantically interested in you but I really just want to have s*x with you”. He might not have that much self-control, but the bottom line is that this song is horny and so is he.

Someone New - Hozier

“I wake at the first cringe of morning and my heart’s already sinned”

All my notes say is “commitment issues thot anthem” which is fair. I think it’s physically impossible for him not to fall in love with someone new every week, which is the entire point of this song. Also “you knew who I was with every step that I ran to you” tracks, Anatole doesn’t really try to hide it.

Paradise City - Guns N’ Roses

“Take me down to the paradise city where the grass is green and the girls are pretty”

I won’t lie, I’m not sure if this is what the song is actually about but that bit at least has hedonism energy. Also this came up on genius lyrics and it feels like something Anatole would do:

Hallelujah - Panic! At The Disco

“I got caught under the covers with secondhand lovers”

Ok whore. But also the vibes of knowing you’re a sinner and reveling in it feels like Anatole. It’s the complete lack of shame for me.

Why Should I Worry - Billy Joel

“Why should I worry? Why should I care?”

Has he ever actually cared about anything other than his own personal wellbeing? Jury’s still out. This song implies he has street smarts which may not be true but not every lyric is gonna work 😔✌🏻

Only The Good Die Young - Billy Joel

“I’d rather laugh with the sinners than cry with the saints, the sinners are much more fun”

The entire song is just seducing a devoutly Catholic girl, and it doesnt exactly work but I always assign this in my head to that time he tried to marry Marya B. But just in general, the reckless seduction vibes work.

Mambo No. 5 - Lou Bega

“To me flirting is just like a sport”

Unironically this is such an Anatole song. Listing off all his different lovers and their attributes is absolutely something he’s done. This is just a carefree thot song which is his vibe.

Ex’s and Oh’s - Elle King

“Ex’s and oh’s they haunt me like ghosts”

This is also on the Hélène playlist but this time the ex messing things up is his wife (not that any of that was her fault). I also think the general vibes of “I’m gonna make you want me so much and then leave you” are Anatoleish

Rasputin - Boney M.

“Russia’s greatest love machine”

LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME THIS DOESN’T WORK. It’s about the seduction of upper-class Russian women come ON

I’m Born To Run - American Authors

“I’m gonna live my life like I’m gonna die young”

This is almost a more wholesome version of his careless hedonism, more skewed toward seeing the world rather than just having drunken fun but the energy is still there

Don’t Stop Me Now - Queen

“Tonight I’m gonna have myself a real good time”

It’s the “having fun is the only thing that matters” mindset. He doesn’t deserve this song 😔

Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy - Queen

I don’t have a lyric for this one, it’s just like. Yes I am a professional flirter! He is not this into commitment but i imagine he tells a new person this every week.

Oops!...I Did It Again - Britney Spears

“But to lose all my senses, that is just so typically me”

The lack of commitment and not treating relationships seriously is very Anatole, and so is the refusal to take responsibility for the heartbreak you directly caused.

How Bad Can I Be? - The Lorax

“How bad can I be? I’m just doing what comes naturally”

I KNOW I KNOW. HEAR ME OUT. This is pretty much Tolstoy’s “defense” of him verbatim. It’s the idea that he’s just so naturally like this it has never occurred to him to be any other way or to think about other people’s wellbeing. Anatole is the Onceler and Natasha is a straight girl on tumblr circa 2012.

Runaway Baby - Bruno Mars

“When I play, I never stay”

He would never be this self-aware, but otherwise it fits. The whole thing is about an inability to commit and a propensity for causing heartbreak. Also, I’ve had a grudge against this song for years and the blind rage it fills me with is reminiscent of the blind rage Anatole fills me with.

California Girls - The Beach Boys

“I’ve been all around this great big world and I’ve seen all kinds of girls”

This song is like, “What if we objectified every woman ever but made it a bop?” which is massive Anatole energy I think.

Girls, Girls, Girls - Motley Crüe

“I just need a new toy”

Literally the exact same justification as California Girls

It’s Raining Men - The Weather Girls

If I’m gonna add songs about objectifying women, I’m gonna add songs about objectifying men too. Equal opportunity whorery.

Parental Guidance - Judas Priest

“You say I waste my life away but I live it to the full”

This is just him to Vassily. Refusing to be controlled by your parents’ expectations and just going off to have fun is Vassily’s whole gripe with him and also the point of this song.

How To Be A Heartbreaker - MARINA

“You gotta have fun, but baby when you’re done you gotta be the first to run”

The bits about not getting close to anyone because you’re afraid of getting hurt don’t really apply but the “here’s how to make people like you and also we are for sure not staying together this is just for fun” definitely fit.

The STD Song - Top Memes

“Sinning with your naked bod is evil and atrocious”

I uh. I forgot this was on here but I was RIGHT when I added it. This is the lecture Vassily gives him after his Polish wife debacle-

Do It All The Time - I DONT KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME

“I’m only doing anything I want to do because I do it all the time”

He literally just does whatever he wants without thinking about the consequences. It’s just got huge entitled kid thot energy which is Anatole’s whole character. And the line “I’m taking your girl and I’m making her mine” is deeply Anatoleish.

Until The Night Turns - Lord Huron

“I got a helluva view for the end of the world, I've got a bottle of booze and a beautiful girl”

This doesn’t fit into any particular situation but I do think if the world was ending and Anatole was drunk with a pretty lady he would have this exact reaction. Also the repetition of the word sunrise (which is what the name Anatole means) is just a fun little extra bit.

Girls - The 1975

“What’s the fun in doing what you’re told?”

Rebellious kid energy! Also “she can’t be what you need if she’s 17” is everyone with morals @ him about Natasha (I know she was 19 at the time shh it’s about the energy).

Pretty Fly (For A White Guy) - The Offspring

“In his own mind he’s the dopest trip”

This man is The Worst but he really thinks he’s all that and a bag of chips huh! Literally everyone can tell he’s not the brightest bulb in the bunch EXCEPT HIM. Smh.

#anatole kuragin #war and peace #my post #w&p playlists #unfair of this playlist to slap so hard when it’s for the worst character #im gonna post the ship ones a bit later bc im a narcissist and i want more attention xo

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perfectcreaturerarelyseen · 5 years ago

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The Fate of the Fae | 05 (M)

Pairing: Andrew Hozier-Byrne/Unknown Female

Genre: Fantasy, Modern, Romance, Smut, Fluff, Angst

Words: Chapter 5: 1,898

Summary: Andrew Hozier-Byrne unknowingly searches for the woman that pulled him from the bog 3,000 years ago. Unknown to either of them that in this modern world their souls are still intertwined from the life they shared long ago. She is unavailable, he’s not giving up. Will the woman that inspires his music be wooed by his songs or will he lose his chance? That’s Wasteland, Baby!

Note: A/N: This is a story requested by my best friend to be written about her favorite musician. I have been inspiried by his songs and specific lines. Any reference to his music is used in the name of inspiration and creating art. I do not own any of his music. Any reference to Hozier in this story is fictional and used by the author in the name of crafting art. I want to thank all who read it. I have fallen in love with writing this story and would love to hear from you. It will be written in installments. The finished story will be at the very least over 50,000 words. Enjoy.

****Warning!!! (Domestic Violence scene)****

The Fate of the Fae: Chapter 5

The village was in disrepair. Barely a fraction of the original population survived the attacks. Bodies laid to rest in the streets dried blood of silver flaking from them. A pyre had been erected in the middle of the makeshift cabins, once a shining accomplishment of this clan, in which to burn the bodies. There were too many to bury.

Willow woman looked horrified and tears rolled down her cheeks as she looked upon faces she had known. Cared for. Adored.

Forest father could do nothing other than open his arms and allow her to curl her body against his. The elder watched them curiously but silently. Now was not the time to bring up tradition. Now was the time for action towards the beasts that terrorized her clan.

“Enough tears Madison, we have work to do.” She snapped at her daughter. Her words were harsh but there was a tenderness in her voice. Andrew raised his head at the name. Not once had Willow woman expressed her name to him. He’d always just called her Willow. It was not uncommon for the fae to hide their names. To give your name was to give another control over your very soul. To everyone he was forest father. Madison, as he now knew, was Willow woman, and they had always referred to the revered leader of the clan simply as Elder.

He knew this was all common practice. It was safer for her name not to be known. Still he stiffened against her body as he heard it called out from her mother. She had never hid anything from him before. This name felt like an unspoken secret between them.

She felt him stiffen and pulled back to look up at him. He allowed his face to remain neutral but she still took a step back looking hurt by his indifference.

She could tell something was wrong and it hurt her that he seemed almost...angry?

Her mother called her name again and she could not deny her mother. She turned from the Forest Father and went to her mother’s side. Without a word they made their way towards the pile of wingless bodies that were slowly being thrown upon the high rising flames. Dancing fire over the dead.

The Elder turned back towards Andrew and stared him down. Almost challenging him to argue her next statement.

“You have work to do, do you not?” She snapped before turning back towards the funeral pyre for the members of her clan long passed.

He ran a frustrated hand through his hair knotted with tangles and pulled at it.

Why?

Why had he pushed Willow woman away? Why had he stiffened?

It was only a name.

Oh and the way she had looked at him. Like a betrayer. Like he was the one who had held something back from her.

He had not told her his name.

Not when he’d laid her down in the field and let his hands wander idly over ever inch of her body. As the milky white flesh grew tiny goosebumps as the tips of his long thing fingers traced patterns over every inch.

When he had known her as she was. As his slightly crooked teeth had sank into her flesh ever so lightly. Careful, always careful, not to leave a mark someone could see. He’d left his mark on her though. Bruises on the outsides of her thighs from when he gripped her so tightly.

They had crossed a boundary. She could be cast out for what she’d done. He could be put to death.

They didn’t care.

He had not crossed her threshold but oh did he want to. He wanted desperately to know the warmth of her doorway.

He ached in his chest for her.

Now he had pushed her away.

He growled. A primal sound deep in his throat.

He prowled the grass a few times before glancing at the burning pile of bodies in the center of this makeshift village. Nothing in this place seemed permanent except for death. The village stank of it.

He looked for her. Willow woman or Madison, if she allowed him to call her that, was nowhere to be seen.

Another growl.

Then he stalked towards the forest.

He slipped past the tree line and accepted that he had passed the gate into the world of monsters.

Such was the fate of the fae.

OoOo

She was laid out before him. Bare. Wearing nothing but the silky white of her skin. Budding pink stood out from her chest. The rest of her was the color of milk pale as a wedding veil.

She was his though he would never own her.

This was a creature incapable of being captured.

No, but she could be possessed.

Filled by him. Filled by his presence, his warmth, his love, and body.

She made him dizzy to simply look upon her in this form. It was almost as if he could see a silvery aura around her. Like a pair of thin wings or even the boughs of a willow trees. A simple trick of the light he pushed it away.

Her green eyes watched him curiously and she held her breath like a simple exhale would scare him away.

Nothing, nothing, could pull him away at this moment.

No he would laugh with joy when his pillar of pride sunk in.

Finally with the weight of her in his arms he would be at peace. He could feel complete finally. Not like he was searching for the other half of him somewhere out in the world. Here she was. That missing part he’d desperately looked for in every woman he’d ever bedded. This was his Wasteland, Baby.

Finally, oh finally.

He ran his rough fingers over her flesh and she shivered at his touch. He took a sharp inhale at the way he played and teased her body. She smiled a lazy half smile at him and let out a small giggle at her own reaction and he smile back. Oh it felt like it had been so long since he’d truly smiled.

He needed no help to guide his hands over each sensitive space with his tentative touch. Still, he accepted her guidance as she gripped his hands moving them where she wanted him.

He was there. Almost there. So close inside the walls of her room.

Then a look of horror passed over her face. A feeling of dread filled his body at her look. Like a piece of ice sliding down his spine he looked down at her pausing in his movements.

“Andrew?” She asked in her sweet tentative voice. The calm in her voice did not match the expression of fear on her face.

“Andrew?!” Her voice became more intense until she was practically screaming his name but not in the way he wanted her to be in that moment.

He jerked awake. Looking around bleary eyed he saw Madison’s number clutched in one hand, his phone clutched in the other. He looked around to see one of his band mates staring down at him.

“W...what?” He asked still confused. Still clutching on to the oh so pleasant dream that was quickly slipping away.

“You were sleeping like the dead.” Andrew put down the already tattered piece of paper and his phone and ran large hands down his face before shaking his head letting his dark untamed mane brush from side to side.

“Yeah. Just tired I guess. What’s up?” He ground the palms of his hands into his eyes still trying to wake up from what definitely hadn’t felt like a dream.

“Sound check started 5 minutes ago. Everyone is waiting for you.”

“Right. I'll be right there.” Andrew swiftly swung himself out of the hotel bed giving a backwards glance at the piece of paper on his nightstand before slipping into the bathroom.

Before leaving he grabbed his phone and tucked the paper into the pocket of yet another flannel shirt certain he would not leave it behind before heading out the door.

OoOo

He paced in front of her his anger red hot. She could feel it radiating off of him in waves. He’d pause for a moment, look at her, scowl and begin his pacing again. She refused to give him the satisfaction of looking scared. She would not act like the prey he so desperately wanted her to be.

Another pace. Another scowl.

“Where were you?” He growled for the third time at her.

“I was dancing.”

“Where?”

“At a bar. Your snake over there knew right where I was.” This was also the third time she had said this. The snake cast from Eden to crawl on his belly refused to confirm or deny this so still he husband to be paced.

“Who did you talk to?”

“No one. I was dancing by myself.”

“Lies. Lies and deceit!” He practically screamed at her. She tried her hardest not to flinch. He didn’t strike her. He didn’t have to. The Snake did it for him. His hand landed with expert precision across her cheek and an explosion of pain broke out in her head. She fell to her knees despite her desire not to. She could taste coppery blood and when she touched her hand to her mouth it came away slick with red like cherry wine.

“Next time tell the truth Madison.” Her betrothed said absently over his shoulder as he stormed from the room. The snake followed quick on his heels.

She spit the blood out of her mouth and took satisfaction in the way it fucked up his freshly waxed floor.

Little victories.

Next time she’d manage to stay on her feet.

She left the room then. Stalking up the stairs to her room where she in a fit of petty defiance slammed the door. She collapsed on the bed and traitorous tears began to spill down her cheeks. She wiped away at them furiously. Angry at herself for allowing that man, that thing to make her cry.

She pulled her phone out of her purse and checked her notifications but what she was looking for was not there. It had been dangerous and flat out stupid to give Andrew her number but she simply could not walk away from him completely. She should never havedone that. Still she kept checking her phone every few minutes as the tears slowly began to dry up.

Maybe he truly didn’t remember her. He’d pulled her name from thin air as if he had. As if he knew what had happened 3,000 years ago when the fae were still ruling this earth. Before the age of man. She had thought so much he remembered what she was to him.

She had thought he would be her savior.

But he was no savior.

She would have to save herself.

OoOo

She was trapped by iron bars that could not be seen.

He was trapped by the iron around his heart.

She pined for him.

He ached for her.

She was taken. Not by free will.

He was lost. No by choice.

He needed her.

She wanted him.

They were both lost.

But not together.

They had been found by each other.

Still they both searched for a way to be free.

Such was the fate of the fae.

OoOo

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