#How does exam stress affect students

[therainbowmiracle]

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[lefteagleblizzard]

𝔖𝔱𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔯𝔢𝔩𝔦𝔢𝔣

Mike Schmidt x male reader

Summary: After enduring an incredibly stressful exam, you finally breathe a sigh of relief as it comes to an end. Mike does everything in his power to help you unwind and relax.

Tags: Part 7 of this miniseries of Mike Schmidt x male reader. Age-gap (5 years) between you and Mike (reader is 20 years old). Male reader. He/him pronouns used towards the reader. Fluff. Slow paced smut. Top Mike. Bottom reader. Rimming (R receiving). Anal sex.

Suggested by a really nice person. Hope you like it and sorry it took me this long.

Words count: 4000

Can also be found on wattpad and ao3

Part 1-Part 2- Part 3-Part 4-Part 5-Part 6-Part 8-Part 9

You spent every night leading up to the exam reviewing notes, revisiting past papers, and checking your study materials for any gaps in knowledge. It felt like everything you'd learned had evaporated, leaving you with only vague recollections of concepts that once seemed clear.

Sitting in the exam hall, the quiet rustle of papers, the ticking of a clock, and the occasional cough or sniffle from fellow students only heightened your awareness. You found yourself hyper-focused on everything except the exam itself. It wasn't until the final minutes were called that you felt a burst of clarity, rushing through the last few questions with a determination you hadn't felt since the beginning.

Afterward, your body felt drained, as if the weight of your anxiety had been released all at once. All you wanted to do was collapse and forget about everything for a while.

You squinted against the bright light outside, blinking as your eyes adjusted to the late afternoon sun. The campus was buzzing with life. Students milling about, laughing, talking, some excited, others looking just as worn out as you felt.

And then, through the haze of exhaustion, you saw him.

Mike.

He was standing by his car, a short distance away, clearly trying to blend in, though he stood out like a sore thumb among the groups of teenagers loitering around the area. He leaned against the side of his old, beat-up car with his hands shoved deep into his pockets, his head tilted slightly down as if trying to avoid eye contact with anyone passing by. His posture was casual, but the subtle tension in his shoulders betrayed how awkward he felt, standing there in the middle of campus, surrounded by people younger than him.

He had always been a little uncomfortable around large crowds, especially when it involved people he didn't know.

Despite the awkwardness, the second Mike's eyes landed on you, his whole demeanor shifted. The tightness in his face softened, and his shoulders relaxed just a little. A small grin tugged at the corner of his lips. It wasn't big or flashy, just a subtle, tired smile.

He straightened up a bit as you walked toward him, though his hands stayed buried in his pockets, his eyes never leaving yours.

As you reached him, the familiar scent of his worn leather jacket and the faint smell of coffee lingered in the air around him. "How long have you been waiting?"

Mike shrugged, the motion almost too casual, like he didn't want to admit he'd probably been standing there for a while. His eyes flickered toward the students walking by, and he gave a small shake of his head. "Not too long. Though I'd get here early, make sure I didn't miss you."

You smiled at that, feeling a pang of affection for him.

"C'mon," Mike said, gesturing toward his car with a slight nod of his head. "Let's get out of here. You look like you could use a break."

You followed him to the passenger side, and he opened the door for you without a second thought.

The silence in the car wasn't uncomfortable. In fact, it was the opposite. You let your head fall back against the seat until you reached yours and Mike's home, your eyes half-closed as you watched the world blur past outside the window.

The house was quiet, with only the soft hum of the refrigerator and the occasional creak of the old floorboards underfoot. Mike sat on the bed, looking at you as you sank into the mattress with a tired sigh. He couldn't help but watch you, taking in every small detail of your stressed state, and yet somehow, to him, you still looked perfect.

His mind swirls with a mix of emotions. Relief that you were here, disbelief that you were with him, and something else, something deeper. It was the same overwhelming protectiveness he felt for Abby, the kind that made him want to shield you from everything bad in the world.

"How do you think it went?" Mike asked, his voice a little hoarse from the long day. He could still see the remnants of anxiety lingering in your expression, though the worst of it seemed to have passed now that it was over.

"It went okay," you replied, your voice soft but tinged with relief. "I don't know if I aced it, but at least I didn't fail."

Mike smiled faintly, reaching over to brush a strand of hair away from your face. "I'm sure you did fine," he said, his tone reassuring. "You always do better than you think."

"Maybe," you muttered, still clearly uncertain but a little more at ease.

Mike let out a quiet grunt, the corners of his mouth tugging up in a small, tired smile as he laid back, letting his body relax into the bed. His hand, which had been resting on your arm, moved down slowly, absentmindedly tracing soft patterns on your skin. It wasn't intentional at first, just a natural gesture of comfort, but as the moments passed, he found himself more aware of the warmth of your skin beneath his fingertips, the subtle tremble that ran through you every time his touch lingered a little longer.

"When I was your age, I could barely keep it together for anything, let alone school. You're doing a hell of a lot better than I ever did." Mike said after a while, his voice low and thoughtful.

You turned to him, raising an eyebrow. "You went to college, right? You told me you were going before... you know, before everything with Abby happened."

"Yeah," Mike muttered, a little gruff, as memories of those years surfaced. "I did, for a bit. But I was a mess. Dropped out before I could make anything of it." He shrugged, his tone nonchalant. "Sometimes life happens, I guess."

You were quiet for a moment, processing what he'd said, before replying softly, "But you're taking care of Abby now. That's what matters. I think you've done more than anyone could've expected."

Mike smiled again, a little more genuinely this time. "You always know how to say the right thing," he murmured, his voice low. His hand drifted down your arm to your thigh, his fingers brushing over the fabric of your pants.

You didn't seem to think much of it, though, still lost in the conversation as you turned your head to face him more fully. "I don't know about always saying the right thing," you teased, "I almost caused a fight with your aunt at one point."

Mike chuckled, the sound low and tired, his breath warm as he leaned in just a little closer. "Yeah, but I liked that about you," he said, his voice softer now, his hand resting lightly on your thigh. "You always stand up for me, even when I don't deserve it."

"Of course. You deserve it," you replied quickly, almost defensively, which only made Mike smile more. His heart swelled a little at how earnest you were, how fiercely loyal you had been from the start.

As you spoke, Mike's hand drifted a little higher, his fingers now tracing light circles on your thigh, just barely brushing the skin beneath the fabric. He could feel the warmth radiating from you, and it was almost instinctual the way his body responded, his movements slow, deliberate, but still subtle enough that you didn't seem to notice right away.

He listened as you kept talking, your voice filling the comfortable silence of the room as you rambled on about the exam, your friends, and random things you'd seen at college. Mike didn't say much, just murmured responses here and there, nodding as you spoke, his tired eyes half-lidded as he watched you.

Without even thinking about it, he leaned in a little closer, his lips brushing against your cheek as you continued talking. You didn't seem to notice, too wrapped up in your thoughts, and Mike used that to his advantage, pressing soft kisses to your cheek, almost absentmindedly. The urge to be close to you growing stronger with each passing moment.

You didn't react much at first, though he noticed the subtle way your breath hitched just slightly whenever his lips lingered a little longer. He smiled against your skin, letting his hand drift further up your thigh, his fingers gently tracing along the hem of your pants.

He shifted a little closer, his body pressing lightly against yours as he kissed your cheek again, this time letting his lips linger longer before pulling back. It was clear you hadn't realized what Mike was doing, at least not fully, and that only made his heart race faster.

Mike shifted slightly, moving closer to you on the bed. His hand slipped from your leg to your waist, his fingers gently tracing the line of your hip. You were so warm, so soft, and he couldn't get enough of you.

You kept talking, unaware of the way Mike' thoughts were becoming less and less innocent. His hand slid up your side, his fingers brushing against the hem of your shirt, and for a brief moment, he hesitated. Was this too much? Was he pushing too far?

"How was your day? Did everything go okay with Abby?"

Mike blinked, momentarily surprised by the question. His mind had been so wrapped up in you that he had almost forgotten the rest of the day existed. "Yeah," he said slowly, his voice still soft. "Abby was good. She's been drawing a lot lately. She made something for you, actually.”

Your eyes lit up at that, and Mike's heart skipped a beat at the sight. God, you were so adorable when you got excited like that. It was little things like this that made him fall for you all over again, every single day.

"She did?" you asked, smiling widely now. "What did she make?"

Mike chuckled, his hand still resting on your side as he spoke. "It's a drawing of the three of us. You, me, and her. She was really proud of it."

You let out a soft laugh, leaning back against the pillows with a contented sigh. "That's so sweet. She's such a talented kid. I'm really lucky to be a part of her life."

Mike's chest tightened at your words. He knew how much Abby adored you, how much she looked up to you, how much she trusted you. It meant the world to him that you felt the same way.

Mike's kisses became more frequent the longer the conversation went on, his lips brushing against your cheek, your jawline, your temple.

"You're lucky?" Mike asked softly, his voice laced with disbelief. "I'm the lucky one. You're... I don't know how I got this lucky."

You tilted your head slightly, your cheeks a shade of red as you looked at him with a curious smile. "What do you mean?"

Mike's throat tightened as he tried to find the right words.

"You could be anywhere, with anyone. But you're here, with me. And I don't know what I did to deserve that." Mike told you, his voice faltering slightly. His hand moved up to your shoulder, his fingers gently squeezing as he looked down at you.

You looked at him for a long moment, your expression softening into something tender, something affectionate. "Mike, I'm here because I want to be. I'm here because I love you."

To Mike, those words meant everything. They were everything.

And at that moment, Mike couldn't hold back any longer. He leaned in, his lips brushing softly against yours in a kiss that was slow and tender. You kissed him back just as softly, your hand reaching up to rest on his arm, pulling him closer.

Mike's heart raced as the kiss deepened, his hand moving from your cheek to your waist, pulling you against him. There was something about the way you melted into his touch that made Mike's mind spin. You were his. You had chosen him. And he couldn't quite wrap his head around it.

His lips found your neck, pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses against your skin. Your breath hitched as you finally seemed to realize what was happening.

"Mike..." you breathed, your voice soft, a little hesitant, but not pulling away.

He didn't stop. He kissed his way down the side of your neck, his lips warm and gentle.

"Just relax," Mike muttered, his voice low and rough, as he kissed the sensitive skin of your collarbone, his teeth grazing the flesh just enough to make you gasp.

You were still, your breath coming in shallow bursts as Mike's lips moved up and down your neck, his hands now fully exploring your body with a slow, deliberate intent.

"You deserve it," Mike whispered against your skin, his lips brushing against your ear before he pulled back slightly to look at you again.

God, you were so handsome. He had thought it from the moment he first met you, but now it was different. Now he knew you, knew how kind and patient you were, knew how much you cared about him.

He wasn't in a rush. He didn't want to rush this. You were so precious to him, so important, and he wanted to savor every second of this moment.

Mike's lips found your collarbone, and he kissed his way across it, his teeth grazing your skin as he left small marks.

His hand moved lower, resting on your stomach, and he felt you tense slightly under his touch. But then you relaxed, your head falling back against the pillow as Mike pressed another kiss to your neck, this one slower, more deliberate.

As Mike's hands gripped your waist with a gentle firmness, he marveled at how perfectly you fit beneath him, as though you were made just for him.

His lips left slow trails along your body, his movements deliberate and unhurried. He lingered at your collarbone, his teeth grazing the delicate skin before biting down just enough to leave a mark. Your soft gasp in response spurred him on, and he grunted low in his throat as his lips traveled down your chest, nipping and kissing as he went.

You could feel the heat of his hands against your skin, the anticipation building as he slowly worked your pants down, his eyes never leaving yours. You turned around on your stomach to make it easier for him.

When your pants were finally off, Mike took a moment to just look at you. The sight of you, laid out beneath him, flushed with a mix of nerves and desire, was enough to make his breath hitch in his throat.

Mike's hands gently parted your legs, his touch firm yet tender, as he settled between them. His lips pressed softly against the inside of your thigh, leaving a trail of wet kisses as he moved closer to where you wanted him most.

He paused for a moment, his lips hovering just above you, his breath warm against your most sensitive area. The wait was torturous, and you bit your lip, barely able to contain the soft whimper that escaped. The sound of your need fueling him as he gently pressed his tongue against you, starting slow, teasing.

He took his time, savoring the way your body reacted to his touch. His tongue moved in long, slow strokes, exploring every inch of you with an almost lazy precision. He could feel the way your muscles tensed beneath his hands, the way your hips instinctively shifted, trying to get closer to him. But he was in control and he kept the pace slow, drawing out every sensation, every soft gasp that fell from your lips.

His hands gripped your hips, his thumbs brushing over your skin as he held you in place, preventing you from squirming too much beneath him. The taste of you, the way your body responded so eagerly, had him groaning softly against your skin, the sound reverberating through your entire body.

As his tongue explored you, he started to add a little more pressure, his movements becoming more focused. His lips wrapped around you as he gently sucked, his tongue swirling in deliberate circles. Every stroke of his tongue, every gentle graze of his teeth, was designed to make you lose yourself in the sensation. He just loved the way you reacted, the way your hands gripped the sheets in an attempt to ground yourself.

Mike slowly pulled back, his lips swollen and wet, his breath heavy as he looked up at you.

"Relax," he murmured, his voice low and rough, as his hands slid beneath you, cupping your butt softly. His fingers gently squeezed, his touch firm yet tender, as he spread you open, exposing you completely to him.

His tongue was on you again, gently circling around your entrance and moving in slow, deliberate strokes, gradually pressing deeper, pushing past the tight ring of muscle with a groan of satisfaction.

You couldn't hold back the moan that escaped your lips, your body arching slightly as Mike's tongue worked deeper, exploring you from the inside out. His hands gripped your hips tighter, holding you steady as he pushed further, his tongue curling inside you in slow, rhythmic motions. You could feel the heat building inside you, the pressure growing as Mike took his time, thoroughly preparing you.

His tongue moved in and out of you with practiced ease and an almost lazy precision, his exhaustion only adding to the unhurried pace. He was tired, yes, but the need to please you kept him going.

His fingers gently massaged the soft flesh, squeezing and kneading as his tongue worked deeper inside you. The sensation was overwhelming, the combination of his hands and mouth driving you closer and closer to your limit.

Finally, when he could feel your body trembling with anticipation, Mike pulled back, his lips swollen and wet, his chest heaving as he caught his breath. His eyes met yours, and the look in them sent a shiver down your spine.

With a low, tired groan, Mike leaned back slightly, his hands moving to the buckle of his jeans. His fingers working slowly as he unfastened his belt, the leather sliding through the loops of his jeans with a soft, familiar sound. You watched him, your heart pounding in your chest as he finally undid the button of his jeans, his fingers slow and deliberate.

The sound of his zipper sliding down filled the quiet room. His hands moved with laziness, pushing his jeans down just enough to free himself from the tight constraints.

His boxers followed, his hand tugging them down as he freed his aching length, already hard and heavy with need. You swallowed hard at the sight of him thick and swollen, the tip glistening slightly in the dim light of the room. Mike's hand wrapped around himself, giving a slow, lazy stroke as he positioned himself between your legs, his eyes never leaving yours.

For a moment, he just stayed there, kneeling between your thighs, his hand moving slowly over his cock as he watched you.

"You ready?" Mike asked, his voice rough and low, the exhaustion evident but laced with desire.

You nodded, your breath catching in your throat as you spread your legs a little wider, offering yourself to him completely. Mike groaned softly at the sight, his hands moving to grip your hips again as he positioned himself at your entrance. He paused for a moment, just long enough to let you feel the weight of him, the heat of his cock pressing against your entrance, teasing you with the promise of what was to come.

Slowly, almost agonizingly so, Mike began to push forward, his cock slipping past the tight ring of muscle with a low, guttural groan. The sensation was overwhelming. The way your body stretched to accommodate him, the way he filled you completely, inch by inch.

His movements slow and deliberate, wanting to make sure you felt every second of it. He could feel your body trembling beneath him, the way your breath hitched in your throat as he finally seated himself fully inside you.

"God, you feel so good," Mike murmured, his voice low and rough as he stayed still for a moment, letting you adjust to the feeling of him inside you. His hands moved to your waist, holding you gently but firmly as he leaned down, his breath hot against your neck.

He began to move, slow and steady, his hips rocking against yours with a lazy rhythm. He slid in and out of you with ease, the heat of your body enveloping him completely. Mike grunted softly with each slow thrust, his head dropping to the crook of your neck as he focused purely on the feeling of you around him. His warm breath comes in short, shallow bursts against your neck.

His hands stroked your waist, your hips, occasionally trailing down to your thighs as he continued to move inside you. The slow, lazy rhythm sent waves of pleasure coursing through your body, and you couldn't help the soft moans that escaped your lips with each thrust. Mike grunted softly in response, the sound of your voice driving him to push deeper, to take you harder.

His teeth grazed the sensitive skin of your throat, biting down gently just enough to make you gasp.

His hands moved lower, his fingers finding their way between your legs as he stroked you in time with his slow thrusts. The added sensation sent a shiver down your spine, your body arching beneath him as the pleasure built inside you. Mike groaned softly, his hand working you with the same lazy precision as his hips, his fingers stroking you in slow, deliberate movements that matched the rhythm of his thrusts.

Mike's breath was hot against your skin, his soft grunts filling the quiet room as he moved inside you, his body shuddering with each movement.

He was tired, his muscles aching from the slow, methodical pace he had set, but he didn't care. He wanted to make this last, to make sure you felt every bit of love and affection he had for you.

The slow, lazy rhythm started to shift the more the time passed. The pleasure building between the two of you became too much to ignore, and Mike's thrusts grew a little harder, a little faster, his hands gripping your hips more tightly as he buried himself deeper inside you. The soft grunts that escaped his lips became more frequent, his breath coming in ragged gasps as he picked up the pace.

His hips snapped against yours with more force now, his hands gripping your waist as he thrust deeper, faster, chasing the pleasure that had been building between you.

Mike groaned loudly, his head dropping to the crook of your neck as he thrust into you with more urgency. His fingers stroked you faster, more urgently, as he pushed you closer and closer to the edge.

"Come on," Mike muttered, his voice strained as he thrust into you harder, his breath hot and ragged against your neck. "I want to feel you come for me."

He groaned loudly, his hips snapping against yours with more force as he finally reached his peak, filling you completely.

The sensation of him filling you, the heat and pressure of his release, pushed you over the edge. Your body tensed, your breath catching in your throat as the pleasure washed over you, your muscles clenching around him as you came hard, your release coating his fingers as he continued to stroke you through it.

Mike groaned loudly as he felt you tighten around him, his hips stilling as he buried himself deep inside you, his breath rugged and uneven as he rode out the waves of pleasure. His body shuddered with the intensity of it, his hands gripping your waist tightly as he stayed buried inside you, his chest rising and falling with each shallow breath.

For a long moment, the only sounds in the room were your heavy breathing, the soft rustle of the sheets beneath you, and the faint hum of the world outside. Mike stayed still, his body pressed against yours, his cock still buried deep inside you as he caught his breath. His hands gently stroked your sides, his touch soft and affectionate now, as though he was grounding himself after the intensity of what had just happened.

Slowly, reluctantly, Mike pulled out, a low groan escaping his lips as he did. He collapsed beside you, his arm draping over your waist as he pulled you close, his body still trembling slightly from the aftershocks of his release.

"You okay?" he asked, his voice low and hoarse, still laced with exhaustion.

You nodded, your breath still coming in shallow bursts as you turned to face him, your body warm and heavy with the afterglow. Mike smiled softly, his tired eyes half-lidded as he leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.

The room was still warm with the heat of your shared intimacy, your bodies entangled beneath the sheets, bathed in the soft glow of the dimmed light from the bedside lamp. The air was thick with the scent of sweat. Both of you lay there, your breathing gradually slowing, coming down from the high, your bodies sinking into the comfort of the mattress.

Mike was next to you, his arm loosely draped over your waist, his chest rising and falling with heavy, tired breaths. His skin was still flushed, a light sheen of sweat covering his forehead.

You reached up to brush a strand of hair from his face, your fingers tracing the sharp line of his jaw, and Mike's lips parted slightly, his breath hitching at the gentle touch. There was a kind of awe in his eyes, like he was still in disbelief that someone like you was here with him. He didn't say anything, but he didn't need to. The way he looked at you said it all.

For a long moment, neither of you spoke. You simply lay there, staring into each other's eyes.

He didn't respond with words, Instead, he leaned in and kissed you, soft and slow. The kiss deepened, but it wasn't rushed. There was no urgency. It was all about savoring the moment.

You felt yourself sinking into him, your bodies molding together as the tension from before dissolved into a quiet, comfortable intimacy.

You felt the weight of exhaustion slowly pulling you under, your eyelids growing heavy as your body began to relax into the warmth of the bed. Mike seemed to feel it too, his arm tightening slightly around your waist as if to pull you closer. His hand gently stroked your skin, his thumb tracing lazy patterns across the marks he had left behind.

You were just about to drift off, your eyes fluttering shut as the drowsiness overtook you, when you suddenly felt Mike tense beside you. His body stiffened, his hand freezing mid-motion, and for a brief, disoriented moment, you weren't sure what was happening. You blinked, trying to shake off the fog of sleep, and turned to look at him, confused.

"Shit," Mike muttered, his voice low and strained, his eyes wide with sudden realization. "Abby."

It took a second for his words to register in your mind. Abby. The school. Mike was supposed to pick her up.

"Oh god," you groaned, the realization hitting you just as hard as it had hit Mike. "What time is it?"

His body jerked up from the bed as he searched for his clothes. He glanced at the screen, his face paling even more as he saw the time.

"She's going to kill me," Mike muttered, his voice laced with panic as he quickly pulled on his shirt, the fabric sticking slightly to his still-damp skin. "I'm so late."

You sat up, the sheets pooling around your waist, your own exhaustion forgotten in the sudden rush of urgency. Mike was already halfway dressed, his hands fumbling as he zipped up his pants, his expression a mix of frustration and panic. You couldn't help but smile slightly at the sight of him.

"Hey," you called softly, catching his attention just as he was about to bolt out of the room. You swung your legs over the side of the bed, still completely naked, your body covered in the marks that Mike had left on you.

He froze, his eyes widening slightly as he took in the sight of you, his gaze lingering on your naked and marked up body. His throat bobbed as he swallowed hard, his eyes darkening with something you recognized all too well. For a brief moment, it seemed he was considering staying, the sight of you was almost enough to make him forget his panic.

"She's going to be pissed at you" you teased, standing up from the bed and walking over to him, your steps slow and deliberate. You reached out to cup his face, your thumb brushing over his cheek as you leaned in to press a soft, lingering kiss to his lips.

Mike blinked, momentarily stunned by the kiss, his lips still parted slightly as he stared at you. His eyes roamed over your body again, taking in the marks he had left on you, the way you stood there, so completely unashamed, so completely his.

"You look..." Mike's voice trailed off, and he shook his head, a faint smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "You're perfect."

"So perfect" Mike murmured, his voice rough with emotion, his eyes still locked on yours. His hand reached out almost instinctively, his fingers brushing over the marks on your neck.

You leaned into his touch, your lips curving into a soft smile.

"Go," you said softly, your voice teasing but affectionate. With a resigned sigh, he gave in. He leaned down, pressing one last kiss to your lips, slow and lingering, before pulling away.

"I'll be back," he promised, his voice low and filled with affection. "Don't go anywhere."

You smiled, giving him a playful push towards the door. "I'm not going anywhere, Mike. Now go."

If you liked this story please leave a comment, I love reading them <3.

[silawastaken]

Thinking about Chuuya- specifically in reference to school aus.

Because Chuuya is SMART okay. He is one of very few people who can keep up with Dazai's chaos, from a combination of knowing him for so long and also from just being smart himself. In stormbringer, Chuuya is shown to at least accurately estimate the answer to rather complex physics equations that cannot be done in your head. He does it anyway. He has an advantage in this where he himself needs to be very concious of gravity and its affects and how it works, and he also has years of first hand experience with how it works he can apply practically to the situation to make estimates easier based on prior knowledge and experience. However, the biggest detriment to that in Chuuya has probably never seen the inside of a school in his life.

It's reasonable to assume that he receives some form of education in the PM as a teen, especially given the fact he needs to work with numbers for running the jewel market. He runs that market with the most success it's hard in years if I recall correctly, while likely not knowing his seven times table. (In chuuya's defense- I don't know my seven times table either and I have a HISTORY with physics that is actually largely sunshine and rainbows so.)

but he does physics that people who've been in school for YEARS fuck up. Mentally.

So he's far from stupid.

However- I am a firm believer in the Chuuya doesn't preform well in school. Regularly a B or C student. He doesn't fail, but he's not scoring the marks he could be.

Because things aren't explained the way he needs them to be. He questions why things work the way they do, explores other possibilities to a point where he confuses himself over the material because school only ever covers a surface level explaination of how and why things work, and expect students to just get it.

When Chuuya does understand something, he UNDERSTANDS it. It becomes common knowledge to him, he can remember it and apply it well in classes, any grades or scores on in class work about the material is scored high. But the second he's under test or exam conditions, he just blanks. It's not the stress or pressure, because he works well under both. It's the lack of practicality to it. It's question after question with no running line he can use to tie everything together and get it the way he needs too. On top of this, he doesn't understand the questions, with nuance and implications his brain isn't wired to pick up on, taking questions literally in a way that costs him marks repeatedly.

If he was in a college or university, he would do so much better, even under test and exam conditions, but while in high school I think that environment just would not work out for him.

As I can make anything about skk, the countermeasure to Chuuya not understanding the way certain things are explained is that Dazai explains them better in a way that's understandable and fills any of the gaps in his knowledge that trip Chuuya up because it should be 'common sense'.

In my head the ada and pm have a joint study group held in Fukuzawa's classroom after school onnnnn... hm. Tuesdays. Because by then the topics for the week have been established, and they each should have had at least one of each class. They all work on their school stuff until everything is covered and then they just watch a movie on the board in the class because it shuts them up (totally not because Fukuzawa has just a little bit of a soft spot for the rowdy group of teens all pressed up against each other sitting on the floor on a random tuesday in early decemeber because none of them really want to go home and it's too cold to go anywhere else. It's not like they're causing trouble or being annoying- they're watching Barbie princess and the popstar for the third time this term.) and they're not causing any harm.

Chuuya isn't the only one who struggles like this, just maybe the one who does so the most, but he would be an incredible physicist, and through support from a few of the nicer teachers and his friends, I'm sure he'd find a way to do well anyway.

I do know he'd get to college and have a realisation like 'huh? learning is actually kind of enjoyable' and that'd be it. He'd become a certified genius. A gilmore girls extra, if you will.

anyway autistic + dyslexic Chuuya who stuggles in school agenda is real.

[chrisgotitall]

younger reader, early twenties but is a med student at like an ivy league so very stressed and at times busier than mike himself, she tries to hide her stress and how its affecting her but mike catches on and confronts her

She had her head on those books the whole day. Her brain was starting not to work so well anymore. She was returning from a microbiology exam and an anatomy one from the day before and now she had another one tomorrow and she was going through it one more time. She felt sure about it but also she felt like not knowing enough. But all those pharmacies and tissues' names were starting to not make sense anymore.

The evening arrived and she didn't even remember to eat at all till Mike prepared dinner for her.

"Ehi... here, eat something" he puts the plate down on the table.

"Oh... thanks, honey" she tells him gratefully.

He caresses her hair and kisses her head, "I'm gonna do the dishes... and then we're going to sleep"

He finishes the dishes and goes behind her chair, tapping her shoulder, "Come on... let's go to sleep"

"You can go, baby, I'll come in a minute" she says, opening her books another time.

Mike opens his mouth to say something but understands this is not the moment to start a discussion since she has to wake up early in the morning and have those tests.

He sighs and goes to sleep.

The next morning, she wakes up early and goes to submit her tests.

She comes back home by early afternoon. She throws her bag on the floor and her jacket on the couch. She huffs nervously and starts pacing around.

She went to submit two exams and she came back finding out that the other two exams she did, she didn't pass. Both of them. She felt like a failure. She failed two exams. She worked so hard, how was it possible?

Mike entered the house and she got back on her tracks rapidly, not wanting him to see her like this.

"Ehi, baby... how was your day?" he asks.

"Fine" she says trying to keep her voice steady.

Mike stops a second to look at her carefully.

"Can you sit here with me for a minute?" he tells her, his voice is serious and his face is still.

"What? Why? No, I don't have time, I have to get back to studying..." she says taking her bag again.

He stops her by taking her bag gently out of her hands.

"Sit with me"

He takes her hands and lets her sit on the couch with him.

"I noticed you're putting way too much pressure on yourself... you're getting lost in all of this and I know how important it is to you but I just... can't see you like this. Weighing yourself with this. Yesterday you forgot to eat. If I hadn't made you dinner, you wouldn't have eaten at all... and I don't know how to help you" he speaks his heart out.

She looks down, knowing he's right, but what can she do?

"I barely saw you this week. I know you have to do this but you should take it easy. Don't book this many exams at the same time, nobody is rushing you. You have to take your time"

"I know... i just want to do it all, I want to make this happen as soon as possible so that I can get my degree and start to work..." she explains.

"And you're right for that..." he takes her face in his hands, "... but it's killing you and it's killing me to see you like this"

"I know"

"Promise me you'll take your time" Mike says.

She looks at him for a bit and then gives in, "Ok, I promise"

He kisses her. A kiss of comfort, a kiss to lock their promise, a kiss to tell her he's by her side, always.

"I love you. And when you're stressed, you come to me. To scream at me, to talk about it, to release the stress with a make out session..." he chuckles and she does too, "But don't do it alone. I'm here for you"

She smiles and nods, "I know"

[weeb-polls-with-pip]

Autistic Anime Boys Prelims - Propaganda Division - Group 3

Propaganda:

Gene -

"Has a special interest in film and almost works himself to death because he doesn't think his film is as perfect as he wants it to be. He completely botches a project on purpose, an action blockbuster, because he felt like it wasn't respecting the thing he loves the most."

Kei -

"It was the scene in which Makoto and Nao discover that he was able to stuff so many wild plants into his bookbag bc there was literally nothing in it that sold it for me. I can't put it into words. I just see that and I know. I know that boy is autistic."

Arthur -

"His powers are literally fueled by his special interest in knights and chivalry."

Euini -

"I relate a lot to his social anxiety, especially his performance anxiety that occurs when he's being watched by people, particularly due to his stress at needing to follow the plan/do things the "proper" way in order to not feel like he's a failure. he also stands like a lil autistic kid and i appreciate him so much for that.

(LIGHT SPOILERS) basically, he has a test that he needs to take in order to advance as a witch, and he keeps failing it because he cant perform properly while being watched by other people, even though he knows the "right" spells to use and why he's supposed to use them. on his third attempt of the test, he's prepared a "script" to use so that he can follow it and not worry about failing in the moment (in this case, his script is a hand-written book of the proper spells to use and the order in which he's supposed to use them), but when a part of the exam changes, he's no longer able to follow his script. because he's been taught all his life that there's only one proper way of doing things, his way of thinking is very rigid and he's not able to deviate from his plan without panicking. luckily, one of his fellow examinees (richeh from the autistic anime girls poll 💕) is able to convince him to try and change the way that he does things to something that is more attuned to his personal needs- basically change the way that he casts his spells and which spells to use so that he doesn't need to struggle with doing things in the way that everyone says that he should; the way that he cant seem to manage. but, even before richeh helped him with that though, he was still finding way to modify the "proper" spells a little bit to better suit his weaknesses. he was trying so hard to fit in to the mold that witch society gave him, but it just wasnt right for him and he was making it work however he could."

Westar -

"something something Westar's entire character is an anomaly amongst the other denizens of Labyrinth in that he's a big goofball in a world where everything is dictated to the extreme by its ruler. if that's not an autism metaphor of some kind I don't know what is."

Sousuke -

"Sousuke Sagara is an ex-child soldier turned teenage special ops who has to go undercover at a high school to discreetly bodyguard another student. The only problem is that he has no IDEA how to act like a "normal" teenager. Sure, you can say that a lot of his mannerisms come from the whole "raised as a child soldier" thing which, fair, you could make a decent case for (C)PTSD. However, he's also extremely serious and has notorious flat affect and does not understand when other people are joking at all. He's incredibly literal; there's several scenes where he misinterprets what someone says, like the time he asked the art teacher what a model was supposed to do and got a rambling flowery metaphorical response about "becoming one with nature" so he ran off to hide in the woods. Another thing, his social skills are… lackluster at best. He's very blunt, and also a terrible liar for an undercover agent, when the student in question confronted him his strategy was to repeat the same phrase over and over again. One time he's challenged to see if he can pick up any girls, and after a brief misunderstanding his "improved" flirting tactic was to jump in front of them and say "Hi! Would you like to know the names of defense agency spies?" Speaking of, Sousuke has an obvious special interest in the military tech and giant robots he works with. He reads their magazines for fun and was able to rattle off the specs for a model Russian tank. The first time he actually looks happy is when he accidentally starts infodumping in front of the class while introducing himself. One time he got distracted on a mission (and need I remind you, Sousuke takes his job VERY seriously) because he found someone who was also interested in the giant robots and got into a full-on conversation with them and completely forgot what he was doing. It is IMPOSSIBLE to read this boy as allistic. And sure, he might be a little stiff, but he's also very caring in his own awkward way. One time he gave a girl flowers as an apology gift…because they were poppies and he told the girl she could get rich by selling opium on the black market. The "picking up girls" challenge mentioned earlier ended with him helping a grandmother pick out a toy for her grandson. He agreed to pretend to be someone's boyfriend for a day (it went exactly how you'd expect, but it's the thought that counts). In conclusion: stan Sousuke Sagara. and vote for him too."

Katsuhira -

"His entire thing over the course of the entire show is that he doesn't feel pain or emotions like other people. He isn't 'interested in himself' or other people (low empathy) and doesn't realize that the things that happen to/because of him do effect other people, he doesn't realize when people have a crush on him or want to be friends, and all of this is stuff he kinda comes to realize as the show progresses. He struggles to care for himself physically because of the lack of physical and emotional input he experiences, and his friends canonically often cook for him and have to remind him to eat, and is a bit picky about what he eats. He cannot read social cues to save his life and is very blunt and honest when communicating with others, and doesn't talk with much tone or emotion in his voice."

John -

"Is very loud and passionate and says everything he thinks out loud, not understanding why others may see that as weird. Has difficulty controlling his volume, so he's almost always shouting."

Yuuri -

"So he models his entire life around the first celebrity he gets a crush on. He's takes up that celebrity's hobby, he gets the same kind of dog that his crush has, and he definitely has his bedroom wallpaper with his crush's face. But then, he actually meets his crush. And his crush likes him back. Naturally he panics over this and proceeds to deny it for months until his crush straight up kisses him. Then like a day later, he just, buys a ring and proposed to his crush on the spot. He's the guy ever. He's so socially awkward, yet somehow still incredibly cocky."

Yoshimori -

"Baking special interest but does Not Get math my beloved."

[reverie-starlight]

gn!reader, no physical descriptions. mention of long-term rough mental health patches and not doing great in school because of it. feelings of guilt for not being able to do something "normally". university students kuroo and reader. literally wrote this on a whim because I'm spiraling into oblivion and need someone like him to ground me. midterm season makes me overthink to the highest degree and he's very sure of himself, I feel like. reassurance from him would fix me <3

this is like. so hyperspecific and I only wrote it bc I needed some comfort but now I feel like I'm spiraling even more. might delete who knows.

you've been sitting at the kitchen table all morning.

kuroo watches as you sit there chewing on your bottom lip anxiously, laptop open in front of you. he knows something is weighing on your mind, but it's midterm season so he's been writing it off as stress from studying.

now, though, you seem just a bit more distressed than what he considers normal studying nerves. he decides to take a break from his textbook and bring you back to reality before you lose it. he's silently promised you and himself to keep a closer eye on you during the weeks that assignments and tests were at their peak because he knows you've been battling with your own mind again, lately and it's been affecting your grades.

"hey, you okay, sweetheart?"

you jump a little and look over at him. he's sitting on the couch, notes, textbook and his own laptop scattered on the coffee table. "huh?"

he stands up and walks over to you, wrapping his arms around your shoulders and resting his chin on your head. "are you okay?" he repeats.

you pout a little. were you that obvious? you hadn't wanted to bother him with your dilemma, mostly out of insecurity that your decision would be frowned upon by your boyfriend, but also because you're not quite sure you want to go through with it.

kuroo is one of the most confident people you know. he's not super showy about it, but the quality definitely makes itself known in everything he does. that's not to say he never needs reassurance or experiences doubt, but compared to you, the gap feels much wider.

you know you need to learn to trust yourself more, and you're working on it-you swear! especially when it comes to academics as of late. that's part of the reason why you're kicking yourself right now.

reaching up to rest your palms on his forearms, you sigh. might as well come clean.

you're not proud of yourself for making a decision like this, but you know it can only help you in the long run. with how you've been progressing with your degree as of late due to a decline in your mental health, you'll take any opportunity you can to improve your chances of success. taking a deep breath, you tilt your head back to meet his eyes.

"I think I need to fake sick and schedule a make-up test for my exam tomorrow. I don't feel prepared for this midterm at all, and you know how well I need to do this semester. and with all the scheduling conflicts I've had with my accessibility counsellor and not being able to change my accommodations on time-"

"okay. do it," he interrupts, like what you're saying is clearly not the big deal you're making it out to be.

...what? that's... not the response you were expecting.

it's not like you were expecting him to be unsupportive, either, but you were at least assuming that he'd try to encourage you and persuade you to do your best with the time you have left.

"huh?"

he smiles softly at you and moves to crouch beside your chair, holding your hand comfortingly. "baby, you don't have to explain it to me. I understand why you want to do this and I agree with you. you're giving yourself a fighting chance any way you can. I'm not going to discourage you from that."

your eyes well with tears. you had already convinced yourself to go through with it, but hearing his validation really helps ease the guilt. "really?"

he nods and presses kisses along your arm. "I know this one's been eating away at you all week. and I think the fact that you're not going into this midterm with the 'I'll be okay' mindset is a big improvement for you. you care about your performance again, do you know how happy I am to hear that?"

you nod and sniff a little. "that's what I was thinking, too."

he stands up and looks at your screen again. "see? once my midterm is done tomorrow, I can help you study for this one until your makeup test. I took a class pretty similar to yours last year."

"and you... don't think less of me for doing this? for not being prepared enough despite having all this time to study properly? you're not gonna blame me for dealing with the consequences of my lack of action?"

he shakes his head. "absolutely not. you're still working through a lot, but you are getting there, baby. I know it's difficult for you."

"and you don't think I'm just looking for excuses just because I'm desperate and panicking?"

the look he gives you shuts down that train of thought immediately and you take his word for it.

you release your remaining tension with one exhale and offer him a small smile. "thank you, tetsu. you have no idea how much you mean to me."

the way you say it makes him think you're not just thanking him for offering his help, but his support during your darkest times as well.

he kisses your temple and rubs the back of your head. "of course, baby. you're the love of my life, I'm always going to be here for you. okay?"

"okay."

"good," he grins and kisses you on the lips before heading back over to the couch. "later we can think up what sickness you came down with. how do you feel about food poisoning?"

you snicker and throw a crumpled piece of paper at him. "well if you're cooking tonight, I might not have to fake it after all."

he laughs sarcastically and watches with fondness in his eyes as you go back to your material and continue studying, this time far less stressed.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

idk if I want to post this. I feel weird about how directly it applies to where I'm at right now lol

and I feel like I'm just making excuses for myself atp, even though I know that's not true :((

[puffein]

FALL PARTY | late spring [ii.]

summary: you persuaded wanda to go to the party with you but at what cost? pairings: wanda maximoff x fem!reader warnings: the usual angst lol word count: 1069 a/n: idk how to feel about this but please enjoy!

series masterlist playlist!

New Brunswick, New Jersey

November 2021

"We should go, Wanda. I bet it's gonna be fun!" your voice booms from the bathroom, Wanda looks up from the book she's reading, her feet tucked tightly under her thighs. She shrugs and then realizes you cannot see her across the room.

"I don't know. I don't like parties," she says quietly. You got out of the bathroom wearing something that screams party girl. Wanda's eyes linger on you, for a little too long and abruptly looks down on her book. 

You bit your bottom lip lightly, thinking of different things to persuade her. Fall exams week just ended and you badly want to go to the party and drink the stress of studying all week away, but if Wanda won't go then the decision is settled. You wouldn't want to leave her behind even if it means ditching a scheduled plan with your roommate. 

"Okay, we won't go then," you said, your arms reaching out to smooth strays of her long brown hair.

She sighs, "No, you go. I can stay with Darcy or something." She shrugs, untucking her feet and placing them solidly onto your black carpet. Her eyes muster a wavering stare, eyelids drooped as her glinting green eyes filled with doubt.

You roll your eyes at her, sitting beside her, "Party won't be fun without you." 

Shoulders rigid, you tense as her eyes stare right at your face, analyzing your features, observing how she examines every person her eyes settled in. Sometimes, fright would swallow up your whole essence, afraid she would analyze something out of you, something you deeply hid under. 

Fear would always strike up at your chest whenever she does this, the staring, the head tilting with eyes determined, afraid she might see your feelings for her. She didn't have to know the affection you have for her goes beyond the borderlines of platonic warmth.

Then she looks away, brows furrowed, "I'll go then." her voice quiet. You see the fiddling of her hands and the nibbling of her bottom lip.

"We don't have to— wait, really? I mean, I'm fine with just staying here with you, we could watch movies or some—"

"You persuaded me anyways with that rat eyes."

You gasp at her dramatically, her laugh resounding in your all too quiet dorm room. Your face flushed at the sudden laughter she had emitted, the melodic laugh stabbed right into your chest with its sharp edges, however, instead of feeling pain all you have felt is fondness and devotion for the laughing girl.

That's how you found yourself and Wanda huddled together in a crowded room, sound blasting all over the place, people swarmed together to dance and sway their bodies closely. You felt the burning touch of her fingertips, her hands tightly grasping at your waist, leaving a fiery coil at the pit of your stomach. You try not to think too much of her touch, you knew Wanda hates crowded rooms, which makes her feel too close to people. 

You now kinda feel bad persuading her in something she deeply despises and watching her clutch at your side like a terrified puppy made you want to back out of the party and spend the night watching her favorite sitcoms. 

Your thoughts snap in place as you felt her tugging you impossibly closer, you lean into her ears, "Wanna grab drinks?"

Her wide eyes peer at yours and nods meekly, you smile at her encouragingly, wrapping your fingers around her wrist delicately, you pull the two of you out of the crowded room into a corner with much more space and none of that sweaty college students around.

"Stay here, I'll get you an apple juice." you playfully utter.

Wanda rolls her eyes, her cheeks turning pink as she scrunches up her nose endearingly. Huffing, she says, "Very funny."

You wave your hands in the air while walking away, steps bouncing lightly towards the kitchen of whoever house this Stark dude stole. Proud surrounds your chest at having the ability to find a space solely for Wanda. Not only for Wanda but for you and her too.

"I thought I will be ditched. Surprises." curly fiery red hair comes into your view, and you glance at her with brows raised high.

"I never ditch you."

"You did. Three days ago claiming it was yours and Wanda's sitcom day. Oh, and that coffee plan we had a week ago which totally got bamboozled as you said your best friend feels weird so—"

"Jesus. I get it." you sigh defeated, shoulders slump but a mischievous glint surrounds your roommate's eyes.

"Just ask her out." she suddenly suggests, lower back positioned right at the kitchen counter, slender hands grasping a small drink with lots of ice.

You shake your head, "No way, Nat. Wanda doesn't —" 

Your words die down as your eyes settled on your best friend, tucked in the corner of the room but this time she's not alone. A tall blonde man stands beside her, he keeps a respectful distance between them, head bobbing and his interest is piqued at whatever your best friend is babbling about.

"—like me." you continued. Your Face scrunched up in a weird, pain, embarrassment kind of way. 

Wanda doesn't like talking to strangers, much less babbling her night away with a man she never met before. 

So, watching her step out of her comfort zone for someone she had never met gave you a very weird erupting feeling of sorrow and bitterness. You could practically taste the dejection and wretchedness of the hurling realization that this man might be too special for him to get Wanda to break the walls she had put herself and gaze at him like he was the only being who matters in the entire space.

That was the night you very first felt a strong feeling of patheticness. 

You will always be the girl admiring the person she deeply loves from afar, who will always be positioned at the sidelines, who will always be the best friend, and will never be more than that.

Other than that, realizing that you were the one who persuaded her to come to this party made you sick. To come into the very place where she met the man she will be marrying 3 years from now.

Safe to say, you are the cause of your very own heartbreak.

general masterlist ◄ ►

—୧ taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta @sokovianbaby

[gatitties]

Would you ever consider writing a continuation of your ‘Not in my world’ writings?

─ Strawhats, Heart Pirates & Kid Pirates x isekaed!student!reader

─ Summary: you are definitely not made for this world, luckily you have a good protective squad!

─ Warnings: none

Part one / Part three (Kid Pirates)

I have some more thoughts in mind but not many ideas, although I'm open to suggestions with the theme if you would like something specific :')

─ Before you were struggling with the stress of exams, now you're struggling with the stress of this crew, you can't even spend five measly minutes calm because you're already in hot pursuit.

─ Good side, no one knew you and no one seemed to notice you (just like in your class haha…) which got you rid of a 'wanted' poster at least for now.

─ Bad side, you were exposed to a ridiculous amount of dangers from which you couldn't defend yourself (beyond punching or biting someone).

─ Luckily you have a captain who gave you complete security, and when he was being stupid you always had a swordsman watching your back, and if he was lost you had a cook by your side to help, but if he was too busy (flirting) you also had the strength of a cyborg at your side, and if none of them were there to help you only had one thing left…

─ Cry.

─ You didn't underestimate the protection of Nami, Usopp, Robin, Chopper, Brook or Jinbe, but you felt much safer with those four idiots, for no specific reasons, they were the ones who got you out of trouble the most, but you would trust them all with your life.

─ And speaking of crying, it was the best way to deal with all this pressure of the change in the world, even though in your previous life you were not completely happy, the radical change still affects you, Robin was the one who consoled you the most for that and you always come when you feel bad.

─ At least, you left some of your pessimistic thoughts about your future or what was going to become of it, you just have to enjoy the little moments of peace that you had traveling through this world.

─ Sometimes you got a little irritated because everyone saw you as a scaredy cat (which you really were) and they saw you as a baby that they had to protect, you weren't even that little! although you were not going to complain about the protection when you find yourself in trouble.

─ Without a doubt, it was a change of scenery for the better (largely also for the worse) because it helped you forget about things from your old life and rebuild your person, maybe a little change didn't hurt you, but you still feared for your life when side of this team.

─ You definitely get a lot of hugs with Nami and Usopp when something scary happens.

─ Chopper still scolds you for your sleep schedule and has Brook put you to sleep early for your health.

─ Although you have improved your eating schedules and have started eating healthier thanks to Sanji.

─ You also started training with Zoro and Jinbe, not as intensely, just some defense and stamina because you're going to need it if at some point they're not there to save you.

─ It is clear that Law does not make much of an appearance, rather it's his actions that put him so high on the wanted list, he is much more discreet than Luffy.

─ But that doesn't mean that all his demands to keep you in the submarine cause you stress, much less than before, but it persisted in the back of your mind, couldn't he understand you from emo to emo?

─ Luckily, being a student means that most of the time you have to fend for yourself to survive tests, exams, works... without help because good or kind teachers? Nah, that doesn't exist or they're an endangered species, so you pretty much know how to do everything.

─ Or at least learn fast and adapt, you quickly accepted the dangers of the world and most importantly how not to attract attention (it's not like you had done it before), anyway you were learning from the best, Law knew very well how to go unnoticed.

─ The good thing, you took this whole thing as a little vacation, it didn't bother you too much not leaving the Polar Tang, plus it meant less trouble and less fear of someone stabbing you or something.

─ The bad thing, Law was very demanding with everything, he reminded you of a child demanding new toys (surgical material), unfortunately you couldn't disobey if you didn't want to end up abandoned to your fate.

─ From what you know Law is quite strong so you should be around him, the problem is that you are not useful when you get mentally worn out and it seems that if you receive a lot of demands your mind will just shut down and do everything wrong.

─ Of course, your captain will notice and let you rest and urge you to go out for a while when they stop on an island, he will keep an eye on you because he knows that your appearance stands out from the others, he did not have infinite clothes and sometimes you used the outfit with you ended up here.

─ Luckily you always had your back covered, if he wasn't there, Shachi and Penguin would always follow you as a good dynamic duo, they helped clear your mind due to the amount of absurd comments or jokes they told.

─ Bepo is always there for a hug, the best hugs you've ever had.

─ You started some self defense lessons with Jean Bart just for good measure.

─ Law would like to scold you for your bad sleep schedule but he was no one to talk about it…

─ However, he doesn't take long to point out all the things that are harmful to your health, like when you sit like a shrimp causing back pain.

─ You are doomed, if you thought Luffy was someone who made a scandal it is because you do not know this crew, you definitely threw away a long time ago (literally the first minutes in this world) the possibility of ending up in a beautiful or peaceful place, free of anxiety.

─ Before it caused you a bit of discomfort that your classmates didn't count on you with some activities, now you are more than grateful that your presence is like that of a ghost.

─ Kid doesn't care much if you get into fights or if you draw the attention of someone who could hurt you, if you are inside his ship you must be strong, he only cared that you didn't hurt yourself because he didn't want to have to clean your brains from his boat deck.

─ Don't worry about it, Killer has your back, even if he doesn't show it, he feels sorry for you and your unfortunate encounter with his world, because he was the one with whom you vented the most as if he were your own mother, he will do everything possible by talking to Kid so that don't expose you to so many dangers.

─ Kid agreed to be more 'soft' about your weakness since you were useful in many aspects, you know, you're not stupid and you know how to adapt despite being terribly scared.

─ The good side, you were stopped from involving yourself in small crew tournaments, be it wrestling, drinking, or even a little thumb wrestling, not to mention you wouldn't actively participate in anything that required force or violence.

─ The bad side, they started treating you like the most fragile person on the planet (Kid no, he just stopped being less of an idiot with you), you constantly had Heat and Wire as your personal bodyguards but there came a point where it was ridiculous even for you.

─ It's not like you've never felt scared (or harassed) of someone in your other life, not that you were a warrior, but if you had to throw punches, you were going to.

─ This is how you began to learn to fight with Killer, although he didn't like the idea very much either, he accepted because it never hurts to know something about defense.

─ They all agreed not to bombard you too much either with questions or tasks, they knew what would trigger your anxiety and didn't want you sticking any more forks anywhere else in their bodies, Wire was good at calming you down in the moments you were within a second of hysteria.

─ You couldn't determine if you preferred to suffer in your previous life or in this one, but you thought that being here gave you the courage to live that you didn't have before and you believed that you could improve your person now that you didn't feel so much social pressure on you, in a certain way, you were free.

[obey-me-disaster]

Hi i was wonderinf if you could make a fic about ghe om charactess reactind to MC doing sh or sum causr im in teh moos to cry rna nd i cant dind ahy good angstfisc lmqo

/not forsce

A/N:Sorry for the long wait! I have decided to brake it into smaller fics for every character instead of one big fic. I will have to do separate posts for it most likely.

CW: self harm, self depricating thoughts, suicidal thoughts, starving as a self punishement/as a way to cause harm

Disclamier: This is inspired from personal experience, so I may not be able to capture the full depth of this topic or how it affects different people. I may rewrite parts of it in the future.

Lucifer x gn!MC

Mammon x gn!MC

Lucifer, Mammon x gn!MC that self harms

When the exchange program first begun MC's safety was regarded as something vital for Diavolo's plan. No one was expecting the way the human exchange student would become so beloved by so many people.

As time went on everyone was so captivated by MC that they failed to realize that they have put them on some sort of pedestal. Sure, the angel, sorcerer and the demons were observant of the way MC was acting but no one wanted to expect something bad was happening to them, especially when they were quick to reassure everyone that nothing was wrong with them.

There were times when the human would be withdrawn from everyone. Times where they looked like they have no energy left and were lost in their own world or times when they were quick to getting annoyed, wanting to be away from everyone. Excuses such as 'I am stressed because of exams' 'I have not been sleeping enough' 'Just one of those days' could only get them so far with beings older than their entire bloodline.

"I know there is something bothering them but every time I try to ask them, they always hit me with one of those lame excuses!" Huffing Mammon stops pacing around and sits on the couch.

"That's exactly why everyone gathered here today. MC is obviously hiding something from us and it has been going on for longer than it should." Placing down the tray full of snacks Simeon continued. "I would love to think we are just overthinking it and MC is fine, but it has become clear that's not the case."

Shifting uncomfortably in his seat Leviathan decided to join the conversation. "MC also stopped joining me for our gaming nights. They were always looking forward to our nights but now every time I ask them to join me, they just dismiss me.." the last part was barely above a whisper.

"Levi does make a point. MC's mood changes have become more frequent and their body language has also changed. It's like they're trying to hide their body from us." Satan tried to make heads of the whole situation. "We could rule out the attack from another demon. They don't smell of blood and their body doesn't seem to be affected by a wound."

While Satan was mumbling to himself, everyone was thinking of MC's behavior, anything that could give them a clue on what's wrong with them.

"If I stay and think about it, they are also refusing to eat as much as they used to, even when they are clearly hungry. I have left some snacks for them so they won't get hungry, but I don't know if MC ever ate them or not." Beel tried to recall all the times MC refused to eat, but just thinking about it made him lose all his appetite.

"Now that we're putting together all of these 'new' habits of MC makes it clear that there is something going on." Diavolo ran a hand through his hair as he sighed. "Solomon, you're the only other human in the whole exchange, maybe you have a better idea of what's happening to them..."

All eyes turned towards the sorcerer, waiting for a response that would help them understand the whole situation. "I actually may suspect something but none of you will like it.." Solomon waited to see if any of them would make a comment, but when that didn't happen he continued on with his explanation.

"As Satan said, their body language has changed and they are trying to cover their body more. The idea of an attack or a curse can be ruled since that would have been observed by now." Everyone nodded, everything he said up until that point was already established. "I am not gonna beat around the bush but I think they may be self harming in some kind of capacity. It's not to the point where it draws blood so we can rule out any kind of cutting. It still doesn't make the situation good but there is at least that..."

"Now what?! We can't let then continue, can we??" Mammon snapped at them out of frustration over the situation. "Going over to MC to confront them about the whole situation won't help them either." Lucifer said as a matter of fact. "For now we will act as if we don't know until we come up with a way to approach the subject."

Seeing as there was nothing else to add to the discussion everyone decided to end things there. Luke could distract MC out of the Purgatory Hall for so long after all.

Lucifer

After the group discussion he decided to watch over MC more closely. Lucifer would often invite them in his study room to talk about their day or if anything was bothering them and every time MC would try to retreat away from everyone, he would take them out on a walk or on dates.

This went on for a little under two weeks before he decided to finally have a talk with them. While MC seemed to be more relaxed than before it was clear that they were not going to open up with him any time soon, and he refused to sit by and let them hurt themself in any capacity.

"So, what did you want to talk about? I am not in trouble, am I?" MC was sitting next to him on the couch. Lucifer has called them a bit earlier into his room with the excuse of 'talking about some recent problems'.

"You are not in trouble, no." Taking a sip from his cup of demonus. "I am not about to waltz around the subject now that you're here." Setting the glass down he took one of their hands in his own and started to gently rub his thumb over their knuckles. "There is something bothering you and I don't want to hear any of your old excuses. Please, tell me the truth so I can help you." From the look the avatar of pride gave them, they knew there was no backing out of this discussion.

He could feel MC's whole body tense up at his question. They stared at him for a while, opening and closing their mouth every time they would try to come up with some sort of excuse only give up. Lucifer waited for them patiently to find their words. If anyone knows how hard it can be to let yourself be vulnerable is him, so he was not gonna rush them. He already approached the subject in a not so gentle manner, to demand more, at least for now would only push MC away.

Finally giving up on coming up with excuses or trying to find a way to make the situation seem less bad than it is, MC leaned their head against Lucifer's shoulder. "Was it that obvious? The way I've been acting.."

"Yes, it was quite obvious, everyone is worried about you" He didn't need to look at MC to know that they winced at the knowledge that everyone knew. "They won't swarm you with questions, I will make sure of that."

"Thank you, Lucifer, I really don't want to deal with all of that, not yet at least.." Despite being more relaxed they still squirmed in their place every so often.

"No need to thank me, we're here for you after all" Kissing the top of their head, both of them settled into a comfortable silence, mainly to give MC time to gather their thoughts.

"I...I guess for starters you want to know for how long I've been feeling like this." Lucifer merely gave them a nod. "Well...I guess not for long. At least since me coming to Devildom. You see, before coming here I didn't have the best self esteem and wasn't that satisfied with my life. When I got chosen for the exchange program, I didn't mind it that much, I saw it as an opportunity to turn over a new leaf."

MC leaned over, their head leaving Lucifer's shoulder, in an attempt to put some distance between themself and Lucifer "And it worked for a while, I met people that care about me a lot, I got better as a person and I was kept busy by the ongoing shit that happens around." Remembering all of the shenanigans they went through brought a smile to MC. "But it's not like my problems disappear. Sure I made progress, but worries that I had in the past came back, past problems transformed into new ones and little by little I got into bad past habits."

Letting out a shaky sigh they continued. "Little by little I got into self destructive habits, such as refusing to do things I would, hiding myself from other to even starving and doing things that would cause me some kind of pain."

Lucifer could only curse himself for not noticing how his lover felt sooner. He put his arms around MC and pull them close to him, making sure to rest their head on his chest as he lowered himself to lay on the couch. While they still couldn't look at him directly they at least didn't push him away. "How about you stay the night in my room? You can talk about what's bothering you in peace, no one will dare to just walk in my room."

Wrapping their hands around his waist, MC made themself comfortable on top of him. "I'm warning you, it might take a while before I fully open up." Chuckling at their words he tighten his hold on them. "Take your time, we have more than enough."

Mammon

Mammon has always been the one to look over others without being really noticed. When they fell from the Celestial Realm he was the one that looked over his brothers and reminded Lucifer that everyone followed him for a reason. He was the one that decided to look over a girl from the human world and help her financially until she is old enough to do it on her own. He was the one assigned to look over MC, to make sure they are safe and well and yet here he was. Pacing around his room, trying to think of a solution on how to approach them.

He couldn't help but be reminded of the whole attic incident, more exactly how MC hid their true reason on why they were making pacts with his brothers. He didn't know what hurt more, the fact that they couldn't trust him or the fact that MC is suffering and he can't do anything about it.

Frustrated he decided to go see them, he didn't exactly have a plan but he was damned if he wouldn't try something. Even if nothing could be done today he will make sure to at least make their day better.

Barging into their room Mammon tried to call out to them but stopped when he heard MC weakly groaning from beneath their bed sheets "Can you tone it down a bit? I've got a nasty headache."

Frowning, the demon made his way next to their bed. Even when he took a sit next to them, MC made no effort in turning around to face him. "What's gotten into you? Ya look all sick and frail" Mammon tried to put his hand on their forehead in order to check their temperature but they shied away from his touch.

Looking at the state of his human, any and all plans of taking them out to town fell apart. "MC, talk to me, what's wrong? And don't give me the 'I'm just sick' excuse, it won't work." Looking at MC, he tried to see if they would react in any way but they only shifted uncomfortably.

"It's nothing serious, I am just tired from catching up with all the homework from RAD, so I need a little bit of rest." MC tried to explain themself but it didn't fool Mammon one bit.

The last of his patience about asking MC about the truth finally disappeared after hearing their overused excused. Lying in bed next to them he put his arms around their waist. When MC made no move to try and get out of his hold, he pulled them closer to him. While they still faced away from him at least it didn't feel like there was such a great distance between the two of them.

"We both know that's a bullshit excuse.." Mammon's voice, while sounding unimpressed, it held no malice. Still, it didn't stop MC from tensing up in his arms.

"Come on, it's me Mammon, you're first man, you can tell me everything don't you? What's bothering you?" He mumbled while burying his face into their shoulder.

Guilt was starting to eat MC up after hearing Mammon's words. They could feel tears trying to come out so they opted to turn around and burry their face into Mammon's chest.

" You're right, I am sorry..." they said trying to hide the fact that they were on the verge of crying.

Relieved at seeing MC starting to open up he continued to press on the issue at hand. "It's ok, you've got me here, why don't ya start from telling me how you're feeling right now?"

The human took a few moments to come up with a way to explain their situation at the moment. "You see, I wasn't lying when I said I have a headache. It's just that, it's a result from me skipping meals for a while or so. In fact, my body feels so weak that I can barely move..." They internally winced at their explanation but they didn't have much time to dwell on it when Mammon sat up looking alarmed.

"What do you mean by that?! Why's that? Don't tell me you're trying one of Asmo's crazy diets?" Looking down on them, he tried to see if there is anything else he should take notice off, besides their nasty glare.

"Nothing of that sorts, don't worry." Turning on their back they stared up at the ceiling, looking right past Mammon. Being relieved at their words he decided to make himself comfortable in bed next to them.

"You see, it's an old habit of mine to skip meals. But when I get stressed or start to feel overwhelmed I start taking that habit to an extreme." Hearing them talk, Mammon is able to take note of how weak their voice sounded

"I lose all motivation to eat, and when I start feeling nauseous and the pain in my stomach starts to get worse, it pushes me to do it more and more until I am left lying helplessly in bed. The more pathetic I feel, the more reasons I have to skip meals and make this feeling of helplessness last longer." Sighing, some silent tears rolled down from the corner of their eyes.

Kicking himself mentally, Mammon decided to take a mental note to watch their eating habits more carefully in the future. "But what set you off? Was it the workload from RAD?" He asked them hoping to get a better understanding of what was bothering them.

"I honestly don't know...it's a mix of that and some other stuff, but I don't want to think about it now." MC's voice held some resentment as they explained. That was the cue for Mammon that he won't get any more information out of his human for that night.

Still, he couldn't leave them in that sorry state, not as long as he was there to take care of them. "I am going to make you one of my famous instant noodles just for you, so ya better be thankful!"

Just as he was about to leave the room he turned one last time towards them. "Afterwards be prepared to go on a ride with me, I will take you to some places in here Devildom you've never seen before."

MC merely gave him a nod but that was more than enough confirmation for him as he went to prepare everything he needed.

A/N: So, this is getting way too long so I will stop it here for now. I will come back to update it in the future for the rest of the characters, but I don't want it to sit in my drafts any longer.

[k-dokja]

Summary: I swear this has nothing to do with my influx of stress/work related fic, no.

Seong Taehoon has a problem.

And if that problem is somehow shaped like you then he won't pretend it's a coincidence. His having to share you with every other people in your life is one thing, he cannot fathom what possesses you to bring your little brother to your cafe date of all things.

"I can explain."

"I kid you not, I don't care."

For all that he said, Taehoon goes out of his way to censor the expletive in front of Minhyuk even if he has no obligation to do it. After all, the boy is turning thirteen this year, he should know some words already. But he's your younger brother and Taehoon's student, of all things, Taehoon feels responsibility even when he shouldn't.

That responsibility does not extend to Minhyuk's interference with your date, however.

"I can leave—"

"Sit down," you command.

Taehoon frowns instinctively when Minhyuk's chair scrapes on the floor, leaving high pitches scratch in his shuffling. Once upon a time, he admired you for how you managed to handle everything at once. Now, at this very moment, Taehoon feels whatever positive feeling he has for your management skill dwindle.

It's only admirable when he's not affected by your multitasking.

"Just let him go home, he doesn't even want to be here."

"It's not that simple."

You frown, lips pressed, fists clenched. On any other day, you'd have been adorable enough for him to forego the teasing and reward you with his affection. Not today, however. Today, he sets his asserting eyes on you while you work your words into coherent sentences.

"Make it simple."

"You're not the only one I neglected with my busy schedule, you know," you raise your chin defiantly, "I need to spend time with my family, too."

He holds back the urge to sneer because nobody needs to pose a bad example to Minhyuk. But his displeasure is not afforded the same consideration, he openly glares at you. His arms cross in front of his chest when he speaks next, "Oh so you acknowledge that you've been negligent?"

"Really, I can leave—"

"Sit down, Minhyuk," you keep your eyes locked with Taehoon, "yes, I've been a bad everything, sue me for it."

You groan, slumping back in your chair. "I don't want to be this bombarded either, but what can I do? There are thirty million things for me to study if I want to ace the entrance exam."

He knows your grievance well. Not by any personal experience, but from his observation of you these past years. More than anyone, Taehoon understands that you've been striving for this all this time. Yet, it does not sit with his conscience to see you slave over it day and night. "It'd be easier on you if you simply accepted those scholarships you were given to study abroad."

Then it comes. The pout on your face melts away any of his irritation and replaces them with a simpler amusement. "Then I'd have to be further away from you, wouldn't that be counterproductive?"

With those words alone, you've successfully flipped his mood upside down. He knows you didn't mean to do it this way, yet your accomplishment is undeniable. If there's any other cherry on top of this, then he'd name the element of surprise you gave him. At least, he can conceal the mirth he's having for now.

"What?" He drawls. "You think I can't go with you if that was the choice?"

Ignoring how his earlier annoyance no longer remains, Taehoon leans across the coffee table, his chin propped on his palm. "I just don't like the possibility of having to be away from you," your reply is muffled but it's there even when you turn away from him, your pouting hasn't ceased.

From the corner of his eyes, Taehoon notices Minhyuk trying to leave discretely. "Sit down," he says without leaving you out of his sight.

The boy promptly follows the order, hands clasp on the table dutifully. Taehoon returns to you once again. "Do you have any faith in me at all?"

"I don't like to leave things to luck," you reply readily and somehow, that spurs Taehoon on.

He raises a hand to obstruct Minhyuk's line of vision, even if the boy manages to turn away in time. The kiss is swift and short-lived. He'd have wanted more, had it not for your predicament.

Your eyes turn round at his claim of your lips, but you make no protest. To be specific, you didn't have enough time to think before he plops back in his seat. "You don't have to suffer now to enjoy life later, either. I already told you before, I'm here whenever. Not just for your free time, but for your busy time as well."

"Ugh, can you stop being pragmatic and making sense?" You groan again. "That's supposed to be my job."

"Stop trying to do everything first then," he challenges, "you can tell me what to do once you have your sh—stuff together."

You sigh. There is no winning with him when he's like this. With a defeated smile, you surrender to him completely, mind, body, and soul. "Fine, your win," you press your lips together, not willing to go down quietly, "but I get to pick the destress activity."

Taehoon smirks. With his initial goal satisfied, it seems like there is little else that bothers him. "Sure, whatever you say long as that means I'll get to spend time with my girlfriend."

Besides you, a forgotten presence speaks up, "Uh, I can still leave if you want."

Throwing him a sideway glance, Taehoon arches a singular eyebrow that shut down any further argument.

"Ugh..."

Poor Minhyuk.

[oceansssblue]

[THE BAD BATCH]—COMFORTING THE STUDENT series.

HUNTER/GN READER

WARNINGS: DISCUSSIONS OF ANXIETY (WITH VOMITING ISSUES) 💔 AND COMFORTING FLUFF 💖. NO PHYSICAL DESCRIPTIONS OF READER.

EVER BEEN STRESSED AS A STUDENT? WELL, JUST IMAGINE IF YOUR BB BOYFRIEND CAME TO THE RESCUE. THAT'S THIS.

You start to feel anxiety seeping into your bones and slowly conquering your body. Your heart beats faster, your breathing pattern changes and increases. The knot in your throat constricts further. Words blurr together in your mind; and you know you need to take a few minutes to yourself and pause. You close the textbook on your datapad, turning the screen off, and close your eyes too. You have to calm down. You still have three days left to study for your first exam of the semester. You've been working for this for months, learning as much as you can; and even if you don't know every single unit of the subject, and you won't in time for your tests, it's alright. You'll do what you can. You always do; and most of the times –with a few minor exceptions– it works alright.

"Cyare?" Hunter's deep voice carefully calls you all the way across the room.

You're studying in the living room-comedor table; while he has been sitting on your sofa and checking his latest mission report for a while.

You open your eyes and look at him; inmediately feeling scanned by his beautiful set of dark coffee-coloured eyes. Hunter is beautiful. He's undoubtedly sexy; and handsome, too. You adore his long hair and sharp jaw line, his tattoos and shoulders. Every inch of his skin; and who he is as a person too. You can't believe you're the lucky girl who gets to call him boyfriend.

"Yeah, love?" You answer, trying to regulate your anxiety still.

You don't want to worry him; but Hunter's inquisitive stare always finds out what you're hiding and it's not an exception this time.

"Are you feeling alright? You in pain?" He asks, trying to figure out what's the deal, frowning slightly in his investigation. "Your breathing pattern and hearbeat have sped up quite a lot in just a handfull of minutes. You've been fidgeting around in your chair more than usual, too. What's wrong? Have you pulled a muscle again?"

You can't help but smile at Hunter's guess. He has helped you through those kind of pains before; always the caring boyfriend. You are hesitant, however, to tell him the truth. You know what people say about anxiety; they think it's a stupid thing, a way of asking for attention, or a simple dramatization. They think you can simply whisk it away; they don't understand it's not just in your head –which already feels like a lot–, but it affects you physically as well.

"It's... It's stress" you end up admitting, just because it's Hunter, and you know he'd never make fun of you. "I have anxiety. It makes it difficult to concentrate and my whole body feels sick sometimes".

Hunter seems to be surprised by the revelation. You realise he's never experienced one of your episodes before. Thankfully, this is a light one. It's a good slow introduction to what you sometimes have to go through.

"How long has this been happening to you?" He asks, gently and cautiously.

You shrug your shoudlers like it doesn't matter –it does–, and look downwards to your datapad.

"Years, now" you answer, quietly. "It used to be so much worse a few years back, though. I had this near pannick attacks and I vomited every single day for like close to a year straight. I... Had a lot of stomach gastritis and such and nearly had to be hospitalised once."

You weren't planning to tell all that; but the words just keep coming. It's something you've never shared with anyone. It was a terrible, scaring moment of your life; you felt like your body was not listening to you, and each breakfeast, lunch and dinner were a total torture. You wanted to eat; you just couldn't.

"That sounds horrible, darling" he answers, his voice soft and full of affection. "I'm sorry you had to go through that. You're better now, though?"

You nodded calmly. Somehow, talking about it has made your current episode subside.

"Yeah. My uh, head doctor, sugested I started taking pills for a few months to help me cope with that, but I refused. I knew my problems would come back when I was done with them and needed to learn how to control it by myself. So I kept trying til I slowly got back to normal, day by day. Nowadays my anxiety attacks are nowhere as strong as back then. My heartbeat and breathing speeds up and my throat closes. I ocasionally feel nausea; but I don't end up vomiting or anything like that. It's just a once in a three months kind of thing now, too. Other than that, I just feel stress as a regular person would."

Hunter nods, satisfied and happy to hear that. You suddenly feel shy after your explanation. Hopefully he understands.

"Good. Is there something I can do for you right now?" he adds, and patiently waits for your answer while you think about it.

Honestly, you just need a break now. You've been studying for hours straight and you need to rest and recharge, if only for a handfull of minutes. And Hunter is the best hugger in the world, so...

"Can we cuddle for a tiny?" you ask, and Hunter smiles like the request has made him happy too.

"Of course, mesh'la" he agrees, gesturing to you with one hand while he readjusts in the sofa. "Get your wonderful ass here".

You can't help but chuckle and you quickly follow him to the sofa, droping your body besides his and wasting no time in finding the perfect spot against him. Hunter opens his arms; let's you find your place. Once you do –head resting on his strong chest and one arm wrapped around his abdomen– he folds himself around you. He hugs you to his body tighter with both hands; head tilting forward and to the side so it rests on top of yours. He gives a small kiss to your hair before letting out a sigh and melting into the embrace.

"We can stay like this as long as you want, cyar'ika" he whispers, softly, caressing your back with one of his hands. "There's no rush".

You humm and nuzzle against him. You'd stay right here forever if you could, with Hunter's arms wrapped around you and his familiar scent tickling your nose. He's home.

THE END.

---------------------

AND THAT'S MY SPIN ON HUNTER FOR THE "COMFORTING THE STUDENT" SERIES"! I FEEL LIKE EACH OF THEM WOULD HAVE A DIFFERENT APROACH AND IT'S FUN WRITING THEIR INDIVIDUAL ONE-SHOTS. TECH WAS THE FIRST ONE ON THE LIST; NOW WE HAVE ECHO, CROSSHAIR AND WRECKER LEFT.

PLEASE TAKE CARE OF YOURSELVES. WHATEVER YOU'RE GOING THROUGH DOESN'T NEED TO BE PERMANENT; YOUR LIFE MOVES ON AND KEEPS CHANGING, AND EVEN IF IT'S SCARY, YOU'LL PUSH THROUGH IT. EACH EPISODE OF YOUR STORY WILL BRING NEW CHALLENGES, UPS AND DOWNS AND THAT'S OKAY. I'M HERE TO TALK IF YOU NEED TO!

LIKE ALWAYS, LET ME KNOW IF YOU'VE LIKED IT AND REBLOGS ARE DEEPLY APPRECIATED. REQUESTS/PROMPTS OPENED.

SEE YOU IN THE NEXT ONE!

Xx,

Sky.

Back to my masterlist here!

[mattscoquette]

how do you think chris would react to you accidentally giving yourself a kidney infection / kidney failure

hear me out, lets say you’re an influencer — but you’re also in college (i feel like a great portion of us in the fanbase are students). you’re trying to juggle the online fame like and your college life, but it becomes very stressful and almost unbearable. you overwork yourself between cramming for exams and brainstorming video ideas for your channel, you get engulfed with working that you start neglecting your health; you get strep, and instead of going to the doctor about it, you decide to wash it down with various kinds of cough medicine and throat lozenges.

eventually the medicine starts affecting your kidney and don’t even realize it. you’re obviously showing symptoms of the infection; being forgetful, fatigue, tiredness. chris doesn’t even notice because he wrapped up in his own stuff.

but he does start getting skeptical when nick informs him that you peed on yourself when you guys went to the movies (you told nick not to tell him this but he ignores you anyway).

what does it for chris is when you faint in the middle of a filming a kitchen video with them.

oh my gosh 😭😭 i think he would firstly be very concerned for your health, making sure you see a doctor or go to the e.r., but once you're settled in there he's upset with you for not talking with him and letting yourself get to this point. i feel like he really cares for his loved ones health and gets really worried when they're sick, so his number one concern is making sure you take care of yourself

[aspirationalmess]

✿ Episode One ✿: Capitalism in Education

As someone who has studied Sociology, I have a pretty good grasp on how monetary status affects people's life chances. Not only does having more money affect your social status but it also opens doors to a lot of paths and opportunities in life.

You don't have to be a genius to see how this works, especially in more obvious ways such as being able to travel abroad, being able to volunteer a lot of your time rather than working and being able to quit your job without a backup. People always say it takes a lot of bravery to quit your job without something else lined up but that's only really the case if you don't have enough money to fall back on.

This is even more evident when it comes to education though and although I always knew this, I didn't really think about just how deep the need for money is when it comes to education. Thinking primarily about university here - it was recently results day for A-level students and so for those who have been planning to go to university, I imagine it was probably especially stressful.

Now, if you get the results you need then that is fantastic; you now get to go into a lot of debt, very quickly from taking your student loan. If you don't get your grade but are very close, it's not the end of the world! You can ask to appeal your paper and see if you can get the extra marks that may bump your grade up. What I was not aware about is how expensive it is to get a paper remarked.

Did you know that to get an A-Level paper remarked (a single paper, not a whole subject) it costs anywhere between £45-£80? Bearing in mind that teachers often find inconsistencies with the marking of papers which the exam boards obviously won't take responsibility for. Plus, getting a paper remarked doesn't guarantee getting more marks, it is possible that you may even get marked lower than you had originally; in which case, you're paying to lower your score.

This kinda leads me into something else which I have been thinking about lately surrounding how risky it can be to have one very clear goal in your life. The phrase “Don’t put all your eggs in one basket” applies well to this but it's something I will probably touch on another time. 🤍🌷

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[tordenvejr]

Hello Vic, I hope you’re doing well.

I failed one of the subjects this semester. I have near perfect scores in all other. I generally struggle a lot with depression and motivation. So especially bcs of this, and because Ive always procrastinated, I left everything for the last few days and I just couldn’t keep up with this subject’s material.

How do I not let this affect me? Mind you, I started this semester with motivation, which was a rare thing in my life, I am afraid I won’t be like that anymore & while realizing that I was failing I was thinking about all the work I did during the semester, even getting dressed up and leaving home, commuting to university took insane amount of energy from me… and it seems like I did all of that for nothing (I was hoping for a stipend, if you have average score of 95+ you have a chance to get it)

Now, this isn’t the first time Ive failed. But last time I sort of decided mid semester that at that time there was no way I was going the pass this one particular subject, so i was ok with that. But I wanted to do better this semester. My family was rooting for me during this exam season and now i feel like im not a god student. How do I break this info to them… How do I let this not effect my confidence?

you let it affect you, and you recognize that it's okay that it affects you. we're conditioned to wrap up our value > our deserving for love/belonging in how much we can achieve/produce/conform to the systems set in place that were never meant to be accessible or beneficial to everyone in the first place. it's okay to feel pressured, and to feel bad about not meeting that pressure in the way you're told to. allow whatever feelings come up to have space, whether it be sadness, shame or exhaustion , etc. those feelings are natural.

examine whether there may also be an abstract sense of rejection from your studies/place of study in terms of not passing, that might trigger an urge to give up, leave, isolate?

i would return to your why of the matter, why do you want to study > pass > what do you want to do? and making sure that that why is grounded in something that is nourishing for your well-being. does the why inspire joy? not just in concept, but in practicality?

if it is something you wholeheartedly want, you can consider implementing the pomodoro method as that can be helpful with procrastination and time management for those of us that are neurodivergent. you get the sense of a deadline so you can get things done and you know how long you'll be focusing which makes it more manageable and less overwhelming.

what does it mean to be a good student to you? because i think for many it means disregarding personal needs and ignoring factors that may be challenging us. compassion is reserved for those that reach the finish line only, being a good student becomes this thing of acceptance and respect being available exclusively when we conform as well or better than possible. which often means enduring methods of achieving that are damaging to us. results become more important than the individual.

i don't know your family dynamic so it's hard for me to know exactly how it would be least stressful for you to let them know. you may want to do it over text so you're spared their initial reaction of their own projected worries and insecurities. or you may want to let them know "i have to talk to you about something difficult, and i'm asking you to show up with understanding because i need that." and have the talk over tea, or you can lead with being your own advocate ie "i've worked hard, i've been committed, but i didn't pass this thing and i'm struggling with that. could you help motivate me or help me be nice to myself about it?" it all depends on the dynamics.

i wish you much self compassion 💛

[kms3438]

week 9 writing homework

*Exam time can be a stressful time for a student. How do you deal with stress? What role does stress play in your life? Do you think that stress affects your ability to make good decisions? How do you find peace in your life?

The exam period is stressful for me. So I relieve my stress by eating my favorite food or listening to my favorite songs during the exam period to relieve my stress. Eating spicy food relieves my stress. So I like to eat spicy food. Also, listening to a calm song makes me feel at ease. Stress plays a good role for me. Stress serves as a stimulant for me. Life without stimulation can never grow me. It seems that whether stress makes a good decision for me depends on the situation. But mostly it helps me make good decisions. For example, studying during the exam period is stressful for me.But the feeling that I feel when I get good results after the test makes me grow. The way I find peace in my life is to spend time alone. when I want to find peace, I don't say anything all day and just spend the day doing what I like. After a day like that, peace comes to my mind. I like hanging out with people, but sometimes I need my own time. So my favorite time of the day is to lie in bed and watch YouTube or Netflix on my phone before I go to bed.