#House Painting Tempe

[caterjunes]

i know my body is doing its best but christ alive.

[teaboot]

One of the best parts about working at a sex shop is the employee discount, and yeah that means excellent deals on sex supplies but that's not the big brain part.

You come to my house. Something is cooking in the kitchen- it smells wonderful. What is it? It's novelty dick-shaped pasta. I've set up a sensual sexy Italian dinner. There are candles set up on the table. They're melting too fast, dripping everywhere- they're low temp waxplay pillar candles. For dessert, I serve you a delicious ice cream topped in penis-shaped rainbow confetti sprinkles and strawberry body paint drizzle, and afterwards, serve coffee with roasted hazelnut warming lube.

We play a board game while we drink. It's sexy monopoly. It's your turn. You roll the dice. They come up as 'whisper into' and 'butt'. I lost the original dice. We're using the sexy dice. You move four spaces.

After dinner, I run you a bath. A bubble bath. The bubble gel? Sensual ocean breeze. There are candles lined up around the tub. The scent is overpowering. Why? They're three-in-one fruit flavored massage oil candles. I'm using so much. It's so wasteful. Do you want to shave? I have conditioning shave cream that smells like limes. And an electric body razor, but you can't use that in the tub.

How about a bath bomb? You toss one in. It's cherry blossom scented. As it dissolves, three sexy bath sex suggestion cards fall out. They're all variations on doggy style, probably because fucking in a bathtub is probably the easiest way to break your hip.

The water cools. You get out an dry off with a novelty towel. If you wrap it around your chest, it looks like you have gigantic tatas bursting through the fabric like the Hulk.

You walk into the bedroom. I'm there, reading an instructional book titled "The Housewife's Guide To Every Day Stripping". I'm wearing a neck pillow designed to look like a massive curved weiner. Also a pair of fake leather bondage leggings and an oversized men's christmas T-shirt that says "Jingle My Bells" across the front.

I see you come in. I put down the book, take off the pillow. Offer you a massage. You accept. I already burned up all the massage candles so I pop a new bottle of CBD massage oil that says something wrong about Chakras on it. It's very gritty. That's because there's little chunks of amethyst in it for some fucking reason. It's fine, though. You say you don't mind.

I don't do massages very often. It's bad. You end up more tense than before. One of your muscles starts to cramp- it's okay. I whip out a bottle of Lidocane topical masculine performance numbing spray. You immediately feel like your shoulder went to the dentist. It's not ideal, but it's better than cramping.

You're not in the mood to bone after that. Which is good, cause I'm actually pretty asexual, but it hasn't come up yet so I'm relieved to avoid the conversation. Instead we get ready for bed. (The weather is terrible, and I insist you stay over.) I set up the futon, then realize it smells like cigarettes from the previous owner and shyly ask if you wanna cuddle in my room. You're down.

I crawl under the covers, placing my penis-shaped pink glitter pride bottle on the side table in case one of us wakes up thirsty. Once you're settled in, I turn off the glowing bare ass night light and the room goes black.

It takes a few seconds for your eyes to adjust, but when they do, you look up at the ceiling. It's dotted all over with little green flourescent lights. Are they plastic stars? No. I've pinned up a thousand glow in the dark condoms. God bless

[girlboypersonthingy]

Hazbin Boys x reader- Comfort ❤️‍🩹

This is a request from an anon- hazbin boys comforting reader with depression/mental illness. Includes Lucifer, Angel, Husk, Sir Pentious, Vox and just a dab of Alastor. Original request here + a heart felt message from yours truly 💌

TW: depression, mental illness, sickeningly sweet fluff

Notes: gn!reader, NSFW during Angel’s part 18+ plz

Lucifer 🍎

Oh my goodnessssssss, prepare to be treated like absolute royalty.

I’m talking foot rubs, back rubs, playing with your hair

Not only will he make you food, he’ll literally try to feed you and offer you sweet praises when you do eat. Eating can be a real chore sometimes…

“Good job, my love. It’s gonna be okay…okay?”

I think Luci is pretty touchy in general, but when you’re down in the dumps, he gets extra clingy and touchy

He’ll pretty much constantly have a hand on you- holding your hand, a hand on your back, a gentle rub on your shoulder

Will unfurl his wings and drag you close to him in bed, wrapping his arms and silky feathers around you as he lulls you to sleep

Like imagine a midday depression nap all tangled up with Luci, curtains drawn so the room is nice and dark, the temp is perfect, the bed is hugging you just as good as your babe next to is. Ugh. Plz, I want this. I need this.

Will try to gently coax you out of bed and try to get you out of the house. He knows it won’t be easy for you but he thinks getting you cleaned up, dressed and out doing something fun you’ll feel a bit better. You’ll at least be distracted from your sadness for a bit.

He’s so kind and nonjudgmental too. He gets it completely. He has depression too. Even the king of hell deals with mental illness, okay? Mental illness does not discriminate

He’ll offer the best advice he can muster up, using his own experiences to help you out of your funk

All in all, he’s just an absolute sweet pea. So doting, so caring.

Angel Dust 🕸️

Also has mental illness, also gets it completely.

KING OF DISTRACTIONS

Angel is a sweet boy but I don’t think he’d be too great at offering advice…

So he does his best to distract you from your feelings, doing whatever it takes to get you to smile, even just for a second.

Will ask you what you want to do first, whatever will make you happy, he’ll go along with it.

If you insist on rotting in bed, he’ll probably respectfully pull you out of bed, tell you “this ain’t good for ya, babe” and force you to go do something fun, something relaxing, something for yourself

Sorry not sorry but he’ll def offer to cheer you up by fucking you, letting you fuck him, eating you out, sucking your dick. Go ahead, take your stress out on him, he can take it ;)

Also the king of self care.

SPA DAY SPA DAY SPA DAY

Will draw you and him a bath, rub your shoulders while you sit in the warm water together, will even wash your hair for you

Forces you to wear a face mask with him lmao

“C’mon, (Y/N)! Lemme paint ya nails! You’ll look sooooo cuuuuuute~”

Expect lots of touching and kisses with him at night, especially if you’re having trouble sleeping

Rubs your back, rubs your arms, will rub gentle circles on your butt if you’ll let him, kisses your head, kisses your cheeks, kisses your nose

ALL THE KISSESSSSSS 💋💋💋

Husk 🃏

Okay listen…this guy is obvi a great listener and he’s pretty good at giving advice. Honestly, he’s probably the best person to go to.

Husk is an old soul, he’s pretty wise, has a lot of life experience, death experience, his own experience with mental illness and even addiction.

He could just listen to you talk for hours, waiting for you to pause before he replies. He’d never interrupt. He’s so patient with you 🥹

Will keep a close eye on you and any new habits you’ve seemed to pick up. He fixes his own issues with booze but he’s the type to say “do as I say, not as I do”

Won’t let you spiral into addiction like he did…it’s not an option.

I think Husk would be a good mix of “Come here, give Husker a hug. It’s alright, hun. Let’s go take a little nap, yeah?” and “Hey, I know what’ll cheer ya up!” *proceeds to show you the coolest, craziest magic tricks*

He’s a good balance of comfort and distraction

Anything he can do to help, just say the word

Will tell you funny shit he’s seen the folks around the hotel do just to see you laugh for a moment

“One time, Angel was walking right in front of the bar at like 7 in the morning and tripped over literally nothing and face planted! I had the best seat in the house. It was hilarious.”

This is my own personal headcanon, idk why but I feel like Husk can cook really well. He’d totally make you food, even bring it to you in bed if you don’t feel like getting up

Will absolutely let you play with him like a kitten, won’t even be upset about it. Play with his ears, give him pets, let his fur be your stim toy, let his purr soothe your achy heart

Sir Pentious 🐍

Plzzzz, he’s such a simp. I love this slippery, special little guy 💚

Big on cuddles! Will cuddle you all day, all night if you want. Loves the physical contact, and loves it even more when he can feel you relax a bit against him.

Will make his eggs boys do anything for you. Whatever you want, you tell them and they’ll happily oblige.

Kinda random but I think he’d be the type to try and pull silly little pranks on ppl around the hotel just to get you to laugh. He’s such a silly goose omg

He doesn’t really understand what you’re going through so he’ll just keep asking you what he can do, how he can help, what you want, what you need from him.

He doesn’t get it but he’ll do anything for you.

When you’re feeling particularly lazy and it’s extra hard to leave your bed, he’ll literally carry you around. Just lounge in his arms, darling, he’ll take you wherever you need to go. Don’t need to go anywhere? Fine, you’re gonna come along with him to do his daily tasks. Sit in his lap and just watch as he works.

Just wants to keep you close. He can’t stand the thought of you being alone when you feel like this. No matter where he is or what he’s doing, he wants you close.

Unless you insist on having some alone time or needing some space. Again, whatever you need from him, you got it.

Although, he may get a little teary eyed and pouty when he leaves you. Can’t stop thinking about you all day and probably comes and checks on you several times.

Vox 🖥️

“CANCEL MY MEETINGS, HOLD ALL MY CALLS, TELL EVERYONE IM NOT RESPONDING TO EMAILS UNTIL TOMORROW!”

Guy needs to focus on his baby right now. You are his top priority, everything else can wait. You are just too precious to put on the back burner.

Will be sure to tell Val and Velvette to leave you two alone. He doesn’t want them upsetting you any more than you already are.

This man has his assistants waiting on you hand and foot. He’s gonna stay in your bed with you, cuddled up with tons of blankets, both in your pajamas as you watch movies while ordering his staff to bring you whatever it is you desire.

Will eventually yank you out of bed bc he can’t stay still for too long but you’re coming with him. Wants to keep you company always

In public, Vox isn’t the most romantic or touchy. He’s a busy man with a huge reputation to uphold. While he would never completely ignore you and he’s no ashamed to show some PDA with you, you sort of always find yourself following in his shadow when he’s hard at work.

Once he sees how much your mental health is affecting you, he becomes much more attentive, much more protective of you.

He’ll hold your hand or keep his arm around you when out and about. Will give you a gentle kiss and a prideful smile before getting on set for a news shoot.

If you’re having a particularly hard day, everyone get out of the way! Hes taking the day off, he doesn’t give a fuck what anyone says or thinks.

You are too important to him. Without you, what good would all his accomplishments be? Without you, who would he share all this with?

He needs you to stick around 🩵

Alastor🩸

I think Alastor would be absolutely clueless but he’d try his best nonetheless!

He’d also be one to try and distract you.

Wanna go to cannibal town and visit Rosie? She’ll help cheer you up! She’s a great listener with tons of good advice to give

Will reluctantly invite you into his room and lead you to the half of it that looks like a swamp/forest. He will take off his coat and sit in the grass with you, staying silent but watching you look around in awe.

He’s got lots of cool powers and will summon or manifest little things here that he thinks will bring a smile to your face.

Summons little lightning bugs to carefully dance around your face, holds back from slaughtering a deer that’s approaching just so you can admire it from afar, will watch with a genuine smile as you lay back in the grass and relax to the sound of crickets chirping and light jazz music.

If you asked…he might give you a hug. Might.

Also sends his shadow to check up on you every so often but if you notice this, he will deny it with all his might.

[hometoursandotherstuff]

This house is crazy and I want it so bad! It comes with Manatees! The 1960 house in Crystal River, Florida has a spring that goes thru the property that's a Manatee rescue and refuge protected by the Dept. of Fish and Wildlife. It's currently being operated as a bed & breakfast, but it doesn't have to be. 5bds, 5ba, and all the cool furnishings stay! $3.3M - it's pricey, but Manatees! Look at them all, right in the yard.

Bear in mind that all this great stuff conveys and look at the painted floor.

Check it out, a blue fireplace.

The kitchen's cute and it's quite large.

This is a main floor bedroom and look at the manatee mural. They even have manatee bedding.

There's seaweed painted on this bathroom wall. The murals are professionally done.

The rest of the bedrooms and baths are on the 2nd floor.

The upstairs bedrooms are just as cool. This is so pretty and it has bedding to match.

The en-suite.

The owners really went all out with the decor.

Small pirate bedroom is adorable for a child.

This is another residence on the property and could be a guest house or caretaker's house.

It's currently used as storage.

Has a nice bath- love the shell sink.

And, there they are, the manatees swimming by in the heated spring- the water temp stays around 72 degrees year-round.

Even the chimney on the fireplace has a mural and there's a roof top deck on the house.

Seating around a fire pit.

I thought that this was an outdoor fireplace, but I don't think it is.

All of these boats convey so guests can take them out on the river.

The property is .45 acre.

I would say that there are so many homes around that they're probably private residences, rather than bed & breakfasts.

https://www.zillow.com/homedetails/244-NE-2nd-Ct-Crystal-River-FL-34429/43637328_zpid/?

[scuttling]

I Can Handle Me A Dangerous Man - Ch 1

Fandom: True Blood (TV) Pairings: Eric Northman/Female Reader or Eric Northman/OFC Word Count: 4,471 Tags: 18+, NSFW in later chapters, it's gonna get real nasty Summary: Sookie's cousin returns to Bon Temps, and Eric wants her... to work for him. 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6

When Camila Reyes steps out of the taxi, she is met with a billowing cloud of cigarette smoke, the crunch of gravel beneath her boots, and thick, humid air unlike anything she’d ever felt in Chicago. She takes in the old farmhouse, her home for much of her childhood, and feels guilt and regret settle over her when she remembers the last time she set foot in Bon Temps—the day of Gran’s funeral.

She pays the driver, tips him well even though he chain-smoked the entire ride from the airport, and lifts her bags from the inside of the trunk; when he drives away, leaving her standing in a cyclone of dust, she takes a deep, fortifying breath and strides to the front door. 

Confident is the last thing she feels—helpless, dejected, and unmoored are the first things that come to mind—but she pastes on a self-assured smile and raps her knuckles on the metal frame of the storm door. A short woman with blonde hair pulled back into a ponytail looks at her quizzically through the screen, and then gasps and throws the door open, nearly knocking Cam off her feet.

“Camila Reyes, is that you? I haven’t seen you in, what, ten years?” the woman asks, wrapping her arms around Cam. They’re around the same height with similar builds, but whereas Cam has dark hair and naturally tanned skin, she is all bright yellow curls and skin like a porcelain doll, the gap in her teeth as endearing as it was when they were teenagers.

“Sookie! It’s been a long time, a really long time. You look so lovely,” she says, pulling back so she can look her over at arm’s length. She wears a pair of yellow gingham shorts with a flowy white tank top and white Keds, and something about that is so quintessentially Sookie that it immediately fills her with fondness. Sookie grins.

“So do you – and you’ve even lost your accent,” she says in a way that’s almost accusatory, but she’s smirking playfully. “Now you sound all classy and sophisticated and I’m the only one with the podunk twang.” Cam shrugs and laughs; she didn’t set out to lose the accent at first, but it became clear that her colleagues in the big city didn’t find the Louisiana drawl as charming as television had led her to believe.

“Ten years will do that to you,” Cam says lightly, doing her best not to reflect on the last of those ten years and how everything she’d worked so hard for circled the drain. “Now, I know you weren’t expecting me, and I hate to do this…” she begins, but Sookie brushes her off with the wave of a manicured hand. 

“Don’t you even start,” she says, and then she reaches down to grab one of Cam’s bags and holds open the door. “This is your home too, and you’re welcome to stay as long as you like, you know that.”

Cam grabs the other bag and follows her through the house, up the staircase that had seen better days many days ago. “I brought wine, if that’s any consolation,” she says, though she knows Sookie means it, that it’s really no trouble for her to stay with her in this big, empty house, “and now you can borrow my shoes any time you want.” 

Sookie glances back and smiles at her. 

“Wine is always good, and your shoe collection is even better, I know that for a fact.” They stop outside what is now a guest room, but which used to be Cam’s room, and she is grateful to see something other than the pale purple wallpaper of her childhood adorning the walls. The room is now bright and airy, painted robin’s egg blue, and its look suits Sookie more than it ever suited Cam. “But the best part is having my favorite cousin back home after all these years.”  

Sookie walks into the room, sets the suitcase on the chair beside the bed, and Cam does the same. Her returning smile is sad; she knows it had to be difficult for Sookie to be here… not alone, but without one of the few people in Bon Temps who really understood her, who saw her for the girl she was instead of what they thought she should have been. Guilt makes her stomach twist. 

“I’m sorry you didn’t see me at Gran’s funeral,” she says—because technically, that’s true. Sookie hadn’t seen her, because she hadn’t made it past the front seat of her rental car. She never even told Sookie or Jason she was there. Sookie frowns, but it’s sympathetic and kind. 

“That’s okay. I know how hard funerals are for you. What matters most is that you’re here now… and that there’s someone I want you to meet.” Cam is grateful for the change of topic, and the flirtatious smile Sookie sends her way has her suddenly very, very curious. 

“Is this someone a man?” she asks, eyes wide and faux-incredulous. Sookie slaps her arm gently and nods her head. 

“Yes, it’s a man… his name’s Bill, and he’s my… Well, boyfriend doesn’t feel like the right word, but I guess that’s what he is.” Her hands move to her hips, and she looks over Cam’s hair, her outfit, and apparently deems it suitable. “Why don’t you freshen up a bit, and I’ll treat you to dinner at Merlotte’s so you can meet him. It’s near-dark anyway.” Cam smooths the hair at the crown of her head, certain she’s got frizz and flyaways no hairspray can contain, and nods. Sookie starts toward the door when Cam calls out after her. 

“You’re treating—does that mean he’s a modern man who lets his lady pay for the meal? How progressive,” she teases—Gran never liked boys who took them out and didn’t offer to pay, and it was a joke between them and their friend Tara; Sookie chuckles like she’s holding in a joke of her own. 

“No, he’s really old-fashioned, actually,” she says thoughtfully. She taps on the doorframe before she steps into the hall. “It’s just that, well, he never eats a meal.”

Bill is a vampire because, obviously; Sookie wasn’t exactly being subtle, but it took Cam nearly the entire drive to Bon Temps’ finest bar and grille to put the hints together anyway. She blames it on the jet lag, even though she never actually left her own time zone. 

They meet him inside, and he’s already seated comfortably in a booth, but he stands to greet her when she and Sookie approach him. Cam is all but attacked by Tara, who hugs her more tightly than even Sookie did, and they make a promise to catch up later when the bartender’s not up to her neck in two-dollar drafts. 

“It’s so nice to see you comfortable here,” Cam comments to Bill later, when he is handed a bottle of Tru Blood by a smiling, if slightly neurotic looking red-headed waitress. He seems familiar with the clientele, greeted Sam and Tara like friends; she has to hand it to her hometown: she would have guessed they’d be way behind the national average when it comes to human-vampire relations. Bill takes a sip and offers her a smile. 

“Thank you. That’s mostly Sookie’s doing,” he admits, and then he glances over at her, at her lovestruck smile. The two of them are so cute it actually makes Cam’s teeth ache. “People weren’t exactly welcoming me with open arms at first, but she has this way of making people listen to her, even when they don’t want to.” 

“It’s a gift,” Cam says, dropping her own hint, but Sookie shoots her an unreadable look and she takes a sip of her beer instead of following up on that. She changes tracks. “I don’t know if Sookie told you, but I’m a lawyer, and I specialized in vampire rights back in Chicago. If you ever need something, legal advice or support, you have my number now.” 

“That’s so kind of you; I will keep that in mind,” he says gratefully, fingers wrapped around the glass bottle. “And I have to say, I appreciate you doing that kind of work. I know not everyone is progressive when it comes to vampire rights, and I’m sure it’s a difficult occupation.” Cam nods. 

“It has its moments. I’ve experienced more than my share of tragedy, had many clients executed by radical humans before we could attempt justice.” She suppresses a shiver at the thought of some of the things she’s heard, things she’s seen. Across from her, Sookie tuts and shakes her head. 

“Executions. What a terrible thought,” she speaks through a frown. She takes a sip of her iced tea, and after a moment, Bill stiffens in his seat beside her. Cam, familiar with vampire microexpressions, clocks the change in his disposition, and so does Sookie; she tilts her head in confusion like she wishes she could hear his thoughts.

Just then, a man approaches their booth, tall and broad, with short blond hair and a peaked complexion that outs him as a vampire immediately. Dressed all in black, he looks especially pale, and shadow falls over the three of them as his hulking silhouette blocks out the overhead light.

“Sorry to interrupt. Hello Sookie. Bill.” The man turns to Cam, his lips curving up into a polite smile as he gives her a tasteful once-over. She can see that his eyes are silvery blue, a cool, icy, complex color that captivates her instantly. “Hello. I don’t believe we’ve met.”

“This is Sookie’s cousin, Camila. She’s visiting from Chicago,” Bill says with a tone that indicates the man is unwelcome at the table they share. He pays it no mind and reaches out to take her hand, to lean in and place his lips there in the semblance of a greeting kiss. It makes Cam flush hot, and she hopes it doesn’t rise to her cheeks for all to see.

“I’m Eric Northman. What a pleasure it is to meet you,” he says, eyes drifting over her face now that there’s less distance between them. He pauses there briefly to look into her eyes, curiosity in his stoic gaze. “I see some of Sookie’s features in you.” 

“I’ll take that as a compliment, Eric, thank you,” she replies, though with her dark hair and complexion no one has ever drawn a similarity between her and her fairer cousin. Cam’s mother was Gran’s daughter, Sookie’s aunt, and Cam’s father was of Cuban descent, fresh off the boat he rode in on—and out on, just as quickly as he’d come. “Will you be joining us?” 

“He will not,” Bill supplies in the same clipped tone he’d used previously. He looks incredibly serious, more now like the vampire he is than when it was just the three of them; Eric stands, drops her hand, and flicks an irritated glance in the other vampire’s direction. 

“I do not wish to impose, but I do need a moment with Bill here, if you ladies don’t mind. Business deal,” he adds, and then he looks back to Cam and Sookie, his features more polite. He winks at them. “I promise it will only take a minute.” 

Bill thinks it over—though it doesn’t seem like a request to Cam—and seems to decide it best to accept the invitation and step away from the table; he glances over at Sookie with a brief apology and walks toward the door, and Eric follows him, throwing a glance over his shoulder as he goes.

“Now there’s a man that makes me think terrible thoughts,” Cam murmurs when she expects he’s out of range. “Over and over and over.” She says it partially because it’s true, but also to earn the scandalized laugh Sookie shares as she slaps Cam on the arm.

“Oh my god, Cami!” Cam laughs back, playing indignant. Not that you’re wrong, but…

“Well he does, all climbable and big and strong. And those eyes—you can’t tell me you don’t think he’s handsome.” 

After a brief stare-down, Sookie huffs a sigh.

“Objectively, yes,” Sookie says, with a playful roll of her eyes, “but he’s also Bill’s sheriff, and… I don’t know, rival, I guess?” Pain in the ass is more like it, she thinks, though she’d never say it aloud.

Cam drains her beer and narrows her eyes at Sookie, leaning in. The objectively shit doesn’t throw her for a second.

“Sookie Stackhouse, do you have both of those gorgeous men battling for your attention? I swear, sometimes it feels like blondes do have more fun.” 

She rolls her eyes again, chuckles like the thought of earning Eric’s attention is laughable. She probably still sees herself as the awkward teenage girl Cam remembered her as and not the Southern bombshell she is now.

“I think Eric is interested in things he can’t have, that’s all—not me in particular. And he really likes getting Bill’s goat.”

“So you’re saying I should play hard to get?” Cam teases, but despite the lightheartedness of her comment, the atmosphere changes drastically and Sookie’s face becomes serious.

“I’m saying you should stay far the hell away from him. He’s–he’s, cold-hearted and mean. Cruel. He does underhanded things to get what he wants.”

Cam has always found herself amused by Sookie’s naivety, but hearing her speak so judgmentally about Eric, about vampires, gives her pause. 

“I’ve been in the company of vampires, Sook, I know how some of them can be.” Sookie sits back, tilts her head to the side, and Cam narrows her eyes. “What?” 

“You’ve been in the company of vampires?” she asks, brows raised, and for a moment she is that naive teenage girl again. Cam simply waves a hand.

“Chicago is very different from Bon Temps, or even Shreveport, so yes, I’ve been in the company of vampires. Plus, they’re the only ones that truly quiet my mind, you know?” she adds as an aside, and Sookie shushes her, looks toward the door and back with wide eyes.

“Keep it down. I haven’t told Bill you’re a telepath too, or anyone, for that matter. Next thing you know you’ll be dragged into vampire business, and that is not somewhere you want to be, trust me.”

She can sense the sincerity in Sookie’s voice, so she does soften to a murmur, unable to be heard among the din of the chattering crowd.

“It’s my secret to keep, or not keep—and it was a big help during some of my trials, even if my colleagues didn’t know all the details. I get that you’ve always hated your ability, but it’s an important part of me. I don’t try to hide it anymore.” The thing about Bon Temps, love it or hate it, is everyone knows everyone else's business, and although Cam’s never felt fully herself in this town, she’s not about to hide for anyone else’s comfort. Sookie frowns, contrite.

“I’m sorry. It’s just… not something I’d be doing, if it weren’t for Bill. Eric holds things over him and I’m stuck in the middle trying to make peace.” She doesn’t say any more, because the vampires walk back in, and when Bill takes his seat Eric claps a hand on his shoulder firmly, in a way that could seem friendly but that looks more like a show of power than anything.

“Told you I’d bring him back,” Eric says to Sookie, who suddenly becomes very interested in her manicure; she drags the edge of her nail through the condensation left behind by her glass. Eric pays her no mind and looks to Cam again. “Before I leave, I want to extend an invitation to you. I own a bar in Shreveport called Fangtasia, and I would love for you to come by for a drink some time so we can get to know each other better.” 

The word drink makes her think of the vampire’s unique diet—something completely normal, not usually something she’d normally fixate on anymore than she’d be intrigued by a pescetarian—and she quickly tamps down the flash of interest that jolts through her body at the associated imagery.

“That sounds nice, Eric, I’ll be sure to take you up on that,” she says with a smile, and as she does something tugs at the back of her mind arbitrarily, something she can’t quite put her finger on. She clears her throat. “Bill has the details, I’m sure.” 

Bill appears grateful for her inclusion of him—she figures he’s probably feeling emasculated by the more senior vampire, the way he speaks with a double meaning under his tongue—and he assures Eric he will pass on the information.

“Well then, I’ll let the three of you get back to your evening. Thank you again, Bill,” he says without inflection, and he looks over at Sookie, then Cam. “I look forward to seeing you soon.”

He leaves, and Sookie looks Bill over, runs her hand up and down his back in a comforting gesture. Cam’s not sure if it’s meant for her eyes or not. 

A few moments later, the red-headed waitress returns to take their dinner orders, and Cam orders a massive salad and another beer and asks Bill what he misses most about the 1800s. It proves to be a good distraction, and by dessert his features seem to have softened again. 

When Sookie drives them back to the farmhouse, the twinkling stars in the cloudless blue sky remind her of the depth of Eric’s eyes.

As Cam walks into Fangtasia for the first time, she notes that it’s exactly what she expects: a small, dark, loud nightclub packed with the moving bodies of humans and vampires alike. Some of the humans are hoping to find a community of their peers, folks with tattoos up and down their arms and more piercings than one would think possible; some are there to see their first vampire or try to initiate contact with one; and some are there just to say they went, buying overpriced drinks and t-shirts and taking selfies with the crowd. 

She feels about middle of the road in a navy silk camisole, black pants, and her most comfortable black heels, and she breezes over to the bar and buys herself a martini, finds a table toward the less crowded back of the room and slides onto the stool nearest the wall. 

It takes all of five minutes for Eric to approach her, looking as gorgeous as he did when they first met; this time he is wearing a tight black tank, black jeans, and damn, if she thought she was climbable before…

He quirks a smile as he sidles up to the table. 

“Camila,” he greets warmly, and when she stands he leans in to mimic a kiss on her cheek. She feels that same strange tugging sensation at the back of her brain that she did at Merlotte’s, but the memory leaves her as quickly as it had returned. “I’m glad you decided to come.”

“I had to see what all the fuss was about; your bar is very popular among the travelers passing through Bon Temps these days,” she mentions, thinking back to a strange vampire that had given Bill a hard time at Merlotte’s the other night as they were getting ready to leave. Apparently not everyone was as enamored of Vampire Bill as others. 

“And how do you like it?” he asks, resting his hand on the table top, palm flat, fingers spread. She looks at his broad hand for a moment—a second longer than she should have, maybe—then glances up to look at his face.

“How embarrassing would it be if I said it’s… fangtastic?” she asks with a shrug of her shoulder. Her joke earns a laugh from Eric, and she feels silly for the warmth that flushes through her at his approval. 

“From you, I’ll take it as a compliment. I’m sure the establishments you frequented in Chicago were a little different from this one.” She hums thoughtfully; she’s had her fair share of meetings in swanky hotel bars and fine dining restaurants, but vampire clubs aren’t hard to find anywhere in America.

“Not so different,” she tells him honestly, “though there were fewer eyebrow piercings. I like it here, though, it’s… comfortable,” she adds with a sip of her drink and a tilt of her head. 

It is comfortable, despite the blaring music and the crowd of people talking over one another, because about a third of the bar’s patrons are vampires; she’s used to walking into a room full or half full of them and sighing involuntarily, the weight lifting from her shoulders when she doesn’t have to work as hard not to read the cacophony of their minds.

“That’s an interesting word,” Eric says, eyes roaming over her face. A pretty young waitress in a minuscule black dress steps up beside him, then, and places another martini on the table for Cam. She smiles up at Eric, who does not acknowledge her, and walks away before Cam can thank her for the drink. “On the house,” he tells her, and though she’s only half finished with the one she purchased, she lifts the glass and takes a long sip to show her gratitude.

“Thank you. And thank you for inviting me,” she adds, and when she looks up to meet his gaze she feels that mysterious pull again, then a faint buzzing like white noise on a television screen, or her ears popping at high altitude. “That’s you,” she says slowly, reality dawning on her, and though his features are frozen in surprise, she can see something curious shift in the set of his eyes. 

“Pardon?” 

“Sorry, I—I appreciate the drink, but I already know what you want from me. You want to know if I’m like her.” If I can hear what the humans are thinking, she doesn’t say, but she knows he understands. He crosses his arms over his chest.

“I’ll admit I am curious about that, but it’s not the only reason I invited you.” It feels like he’s telling the truth, but she’s still unfamiliar with him, and she’s met several vampires she believed to be honest until they showed their true colors at the end. The only reason humans don’t have the same effect is because she can hear their lies before they have a chance to really develop.

“Then why did you invite me?” she asks firmly, because while she’s not ashamed of her ability she does not enjoy being singled out for it, no matter how good looking the other party may be. Eric pauses, then sighs as though she’s forcing him to show his hand.

“I’ve looked into you. Heard about your reputation,” he says, and he takes another long look at her, lingering over her bare shoulders and throat. “You don’t look like a human rights—excuse me, people’s rights—attorney, I have to admit… unless I’ve just been doing business with the wrong attorneys.”

She takes another sip of his drink, because he’s done his due diligence and she’s always appreciative of someone who isn’t afraid to dig through some tough sources. Her firm had never exactly publicized the fact that one of their lawyers was taking vampire rights cases, so he must have pulled some strings to get the information. 

“I was a people’s rights attorney. Now I’d be lucky to try a case in traffic court.”

“Because of your defense of vampires?” he asks, and she can understand why that’s the way he’d see it; she didn’t defend them, technically, because they weren’t and still aren’t able to be held accountable in a court of law, but she did advocate for their civil rights and against forced assimilation.

“Because I don’t treat vampires like animals or humans like they’re superior,” she offers in summary. She taps a finger against the tabletop. “Say I was like her. What would that mean for me? Would you threaten me until I agree to help you? Manipulate me so I do what you want?” 

He sighs again, and this time it feels like an attempt to appear wounded by her question, though she can’t imagine there’s anything she could say to cause this man any type of emotional concern.

“I would ask if you would be interested in doing some… consulting for me. You would be under no obligation to do so, of course,” he says, showing his palms. “Sookie has helped me in the past, but she does not seem interested in continuing that relationship.” 

His contrived description of their relationship forces a huffed laugh from Cam’s lips.

“You instigate problems between her and Bill – or Bill and you, and it puts her in the middle. That’s why she’s not interested.” 

“Is that what she told you?” he asks, leaning in again, this time on crossed forearms. It brings his face closer, and despite her irritation, she kind of likes it. He’s not bad to look at, either way. “I tend to think of myself as a problem solver, if anything.” She leans in too, as much as she can, looks him directly in the eyes.

“I’m familiar with vampires like you—men like you. Everything’s a pissing contest, you’ll do whatever it takes to assert your dominance, and nothing else matters.” If he’s surprised by her assumptions, he doesn’t show it. “Sookie is my family and she has my loyalty. Flirt with her if you want to, that's your prerogative, but I’m not going to stand around and watch you toy with her to get under Bill’s skin. I’m sure you can find a way to do that all on your own.” 

He stands tall at that, brow furrowed like she’s just said something insane. 

“I don’t flirt with her, I just… enjoy exposing Bill’s weakness,” he explains with a shrug. Cam hums, unconvinced, takes the toothpick out of her glass and pulls the single olive off the stick with her teeth, eats it.

“Like all men, I can promise you he has more than just the one,” she says with a smirk when she’s finished chewing, and she downs the rest of her drink in one smooth sip. “That kid’s underage, by the way—the one by the bar with the pink streak in her hair? One of your bouncers didn’t do a very thorough ID check. She’s been freaking out about it since she walked in.” 

Eric turns to glance at the girl, who is saying nothing aloud but does look almost comically on edge, and then back at Cam. She smiles politely, her professional smile, and stands, pushing in her chair and slinging her bag over her shoulder. 

“I’ll think about the offer, if you think about what I said. Thanks again for the drink.”

[dashoulina]

I FINALLY FUCKING FINISHED IT!!!

It's a TARDIS diary!!

It had so many steps and it took me so much time I can't believe it's done!!

Creation process and story under cut

So, I had that one blank mini sketchbook I wasn't going to use and I decided to make sure I do use it in the future. I completely disassembled it leaving the page block and three pieces of cardboard separate. At first I was planning to only redo the cover, but I soon realised that I didn't really like the page block because it had very few pages, so the next thing I know I was binding a whole new page block...

To do the TARDIS semi 3D design I did a lot of cutting cardboard... Then I had to glue little strips of paper between the slits because otherwise it would look bad (cardboard is hollow inside) and also it would be better to paint on a white base. Then I slapped a big sheet of paper over it all and pressed the indents afterwards so it would look uniform. I also had to hand mix the blue colour.

And after painting it I was like... What if the paint loses colour quickly or worse, colours everything it touches?! So I decided to varnish it... I bought some spray varnish, but it said that I have to use it at 15-25°c temp and I had to do it outside (as in very ventelated space, and our house is almost unventelatable, so yeah, the balcony/outside) because otherwise I would suffocate or smth. However the funny thing was that it was winter... And so I had to wait until spring came and it was warm enough to do it...

So yeah, that's the story.

THIS IS MY FIRST EVER SELF BOUND BOOK!!!

The only flaw it has is that it doesn't open to lay flat, because I was a fool and knew nothing about bookbinding... But still I'm very proud of it!

[havethetouch]

Back on my bullshit because now that I have a longer vacation going on I can tackle this again, this time with feeling. Also I had a break in between bc I remembered and forgot to mention that I was out and about for almost a week living in a flat to babysit animals while their owners were out of the country but I had been yearning for the ceiling. After Time got away from me a bit got brainfogged suddenly realized it is September already wtf. If I hadn't liveblogged the ceiling shenanigans I might've misremembered when that started too. Anyway.

Previously on Touch's ceiling shenanigans

And right now we are here:

Ceiling skeleton. The support beams are all askew as fuck and jammed into the the walls on both sides. I have thermal plastering ready for it's call to action as one of the walls with the holes is an outer wall and the cold will crawl through and try to get me without proper insulation. I am also currently busy with removing everything that has been lying about in this room (before it was the storage room for when I freshly moved in so a lot of stuff just.. floating about) because the crossbars do not inspire confidence in me that they will not drop weirdly when I loosen them up lol I also bribed my auntie to take me a few villages over (I do not have a car) to get some more supplies for the removal of the distemper paint and shit to seal of cracks were the ceiling and walls meet. Also... there is a cable duct in the corner right over the space were the oven will go and I figured it might be for the best to pry open the wall to sink it and for that I needed a different kind of quick-drying plaster which was also acquired. And then I thought yeah well, get some of those parquet mini fix thingies.. you know the idk how it is called but basically there are some scratches and dents in the floor in need of some TLC and I know how sanding down parquet and resealing it properly works but I also know how much time and shit that takes and I might at some point say "it is time" but it ain't this year or the next for sure. So mini fixes it is for now. I also have a different endboss now in this entire thing because see... I have a second door in this room to the outside of my driveway. I just have this second entry point to my abode which will be very handy once I work with some of my materials that need a lot of ventilation and shit. But anyway so... Somewhen in the past there was flooding I know this there is plenty of visible evidence of it all over my home that there went water were it was not supposed to go. But nowhere is it more apparent than this door.

There used to be parquet in between (it's a double door) and just look how fucking thick my outside walls are fucks sake and my dad removed that because it looked like one step away from having you meet the underside of the building and filled that all up with concrete but nothing more than that. I think he wanted to seal the doorway up permanently at some point and I am glad he didn't because I adore the second entry point. But yeahhh this is a bit of damage. I misremembered how much bc I had to temp seal this off for a bit because mice kept sneaking through these two doors into the house last winter along with the cold. So it kinda slipped my mind how rotten the wooden frames are and how even the concrete on the sides is all fucked up. Got some work ahead on that one. There is also a massive black spider somewhere in the woodbeams that I only caught a glimpse of before she scuttled in there and at some point we will probably make eye contact when I remove the rotten wood :')

And yeh this is no longer just the ceiling but like I said, am on vacation now so I try to get everything wrapped up soon and that includes this entry door along with the floor. Cross fingers the spider does not jump me she looked like she could beat my ass.

[juubli]

Here are some process shots for this one of Raphael from BG3! That magnificent bastard...

So I started out with a sketch of Raphael. He's got such a charismatic swagger doing the whole "What's better than the Devil you don't know? The devil you do" scene. I just wanted to do a caricature study and have a bit of fun.

Moving from rough sketch to clean line art is always challenging for me as I often get bored or what was originally loose and fun can become stiff.

I had to redo the linework twice because I didn't like how the first one turned out! Second time is always the charm.

I initially only planned to draw the character but I love the design of House of Hope too much, so I went back into the game and took a bunch of screen shots and sketched out the rough bg.

Then I went ahead and cleaned up the bg. At this point is when I group the layers properly, so there is a clear separation between foreground, and background as well setting up the layers for animation. (Making sure the fireplace guards overlaps the walls behind it.)

At the next stage I adding in the flat colors. I wanted to keep the style treatment of this piece more on the cell shaded/cartoony instead of super painterly. So I keep the color treatment fairly flat with a small amount of texture with the intention to add lighting as a fx overlapping treatment instead of painted in.

I work on the characters and the bgs at the same time to keep the values and color temp consistant, constantly adjusting as I go. From habit from work, I always paint the entire BG JUST incase I need to make changes or make adjustments to subject in from. Here is the bg all done, with fire painted in as a place holder.

And finally, adding the final lighting layers added on Raphael. I keep it simple here, just a redish/purple multiply player with the areas in the light masked out, and inverse mask on an orange/red overlay layer of the areas in the light.

Animating the fire took ironically the longest, the animation tools in photoshop is clunky and I haven't animated since school days. I looked up a lot of references and tutorials! It's not perfect but good enough for me!

[ithinkdogshouldvote2]

Dndads hogwarts au

‼️MASSIVE DISCLAIMER‼️

[I DO NOT support the bitch. This is solely for funzies.]

Teens:

Scary: muggleborn slytherine, (her mom met Terry when scary developed her powers) star player on the quiddich team, low key practicing the dark arts in secret cause it's cool and metal. Twin Wand cores with normal.

Normal: pureblood slytherine, quiddich mascot (they did NOT have a mascot before normal) and announcer, twin Wand cores with scary

Lincoln: halfblood Gryffendor, (adopted into fully wizard family) newbie quiddich player, (Grant kept trying to talk him out of it because it's dangerous)

Taylor: muggleborn? hufflepuff, (muggle raised by his mom, dad location and identity UNKNOWN) keeps trying to sneak his electronics into hogwarts.

Hermie: ???blood ravenclaw (pretends to be a slytherine and infiltrates to sabotage them in the name of the ravenclaw house)

Hero: pureblood ravenclaw, really into astrology. Taylor buys the manga she sneaks in like she's some kind of drug dealer. Part of a prophecy or something but super not about that life.

Paeden: ???born? Human? Gryffendor, worst player on the quiddich team, breaks his Wand constantly, says he's casting a spell but then just punches you in the face. (Badly)

KidDads:

Terry: pureblood former ravenclaw, (met veroinca when scary developed her powers) defense against the dark arts teacher, temp Slytherine quiddich coach (Scary HATES this)

Sparrow: pureblood former slytherine, divination teacher, (paints visions of the oncoming apocalypse nbd im sure we dont have to worry about that) animangus (wolf)

Lark: pureblood former slytherine, the mean scary groundskeeper, some students have started to spread rumors that he's secreatly a werewolf.... but that's ridiculous haha.

Grant: halfblood former Gryffendor, hogwarts librarian, Gryffendor quiddich coach (INSISTED on being the coach after Linc joined the team. Benches his own son because he's scared he'll get hurt)

Nick: halfblood former hufflepuff, location unknown. Undercover auror who got found out and has been missing for years.

Granddads:

Ron: halfblood former slytherine (businessman), managed to get through a few years of hogwarts before he was discovered to be a squib.

Henry: pureblood former hufflepuff, herbology teacher, animangus (wolf)

Daryll: muggleborn former Gryffendor, former quiddich coach

Glenn: halfblood former gryffendor, wizard yule band guitarist and muggle dj

Jodie: pureblood (with a little something extra ;)) former ravenclaw, auror.

Omega daddies:

Willy: muggleborn former slytherine, made an organization called the purple robes hellbent on gaining immortality and eternal youth through dark magic. (Basic bad guy shit)

Barry: pureblood former ravenclaw, started a cult, animangus (dragon)

Frank: muggle, got in the way of the purple robes, it didn't go well.

Bill: muggleborn former hufflepuff (haha get it cause weed?) dropout, pretty much a deadbeat

[lamialamia]

Hi! I think you are very smart! Why do you think Brad was cheated? If that was the case, maybe he wouldn’t keep friends with his ex and best buddy. Don’t you think? #generationkill #bradcolbert

Hi anon, thank you for the kind words.

Why I think Brad was cheated on was based entirely on the way he retold the story, bitter and with a thin veneer of "actually-it's-fine-but-not-really" as he told the Humvee about the breakup. If the break-up -- which include not only his highschool sweetheart leaving but ultimately ending up with someone he's very close with, and trusted, which is his best friend -- had been all kind of normal and healthy, do you think he would be having the "raising kids are too expensive don't fucking do it" to other people?

Furthermore, Brad isn't perfect. And him staying friends with people who hurt him in the past, going to their house and seeing their couple pictures but now without him in the frames, isn't a good decision. That's why in my analysis post, I pointed out how this part of Brad -- vulnerable and desperate for connection -- makes him very human.

It's like this: you know you shouldn't be over-spending money, but then, you have your moment of weakness and you splurge on that cute, shiny thing all the same. Hey, you had committed, you got the thing. So does that mean you don't have any regret? you didn't feel ashamed about that moment of weakness? Or maybe betrayed by the marketing that paint such a rosy picture of the thing that temp you into paying for it?

So at the end of the day. It's not the fine word that declare Brad was cheated on. It's his own perception. And I came to my conclusion that he was.

[solarpunkaestheticweek]

How do you do solarpunk aesthetic week when you live in a tiny apartment with no outside access? I always want to participate but I feel like most stuff y'all post is geared towards people who live in houses...

Hey, thanks for sending in the ask!

We put our heads together and came up with a few ideas for you!

Grow plants indoors! You could grow a few houseplants to green up your space, or even try growing some vegetables and/or herbs indoors! I've heard people have lots of luck with basil indoors, and my freshman year of college I grew cherry tomatoes and peppers in my dorm room! Maybe check out information on semi or full-hydroponic setups? You can also propagate a lot with a few cuttings and a glass of water! If you have a balcony with your apartment, that could also be a good place to grow flowers or vegetables--depending on the season and temps where you are, it might be a bit cold to start things out there right now, but you could always start planning!

Crafting could be another fun idea! You could try your hand at mending clothes, or making your own clothes from scratch! I (Ani) am learning crochet, if you wanna join me in spirit and pick it up as well! Kala/Fennopunk (who lives in a small apartment 👀) also knows a lot about crocheting, its a pretty nice winter craft! You could also try embroidery, so you can add unique designs onto your clothes! Other options are things like knitting, sewing, leatherwork, jewelrymaking, soap making, and maybe even woodworking or soldering if that interests you!

Learning how to repair tech would be cool! Honestly, learning how to repair anything sounds super cool and is pretty solarpunk! This can also kinda go hand-in-hand with learning how to build your own things (one of my friends knows how to repair and build computers, for example). Try finding some information on something you're interested in and going wild!

Decorate your home in a way that feels Solarpunk to you! Even if you don't get it all done during the event week, I think its definitely a nice way to bring joy! Look into ways your apartment can change with the seasons, ways to keep yourself cozy and warm in winter but cool and bright during the summer! If you get started, feel free to send in progress images, we'd love to see!

Guerrilla gardening! Winter's a great time to scatter wildflower seeds (at least here in the states for me) as it gives the seeds time to acclimate to weather conditions! if you want flowers in spring, you plant seeds in winter! Maybe find a place you wanna target if you go out, think about what seeds you want to plant, and start planning? Or if you have seeds on hand already, you know what to do! Honestly, I also kinda view picking up litter as hand-in-hand with guerrilla gardening, if you've got the vibes for that at all.

Build community with your neighbors! Even if its just saying hi, or talking about what you're up to!

Maybe guerrilla art as well? Moss graffiti, spray painting, or even plastering a couple of stickers up counts as solarpunk! I will give a general warning that doing stuff seen as illegal probably shouldn't be posted online, but hey, you can participate in the week without telling us what you do!

Speaking of art! Maybe you could make art at home! Whether you use chalk, or pastels, or paint, or pencils, or if you've got a tablet you can use--find some inspiration and draw! I've seen lots of people draw solarpunk fashion ideas, solarpunk building concepts, or just general vibe art!

You could also take a crack at writing! You could write a short story, or get started on a longer project idea! You could even just write worldbuilding-type stuff, like examples of event listings or building histories you imagine a solarpunk society would have, or ideas for holidays and festivals!

Learning an instrument feels pretty solarpunk to me! I (Ani) say this as someone who has 2 guitars around and has forgotten 80% of the stuff she learned in her lessons back in high school. Just in general, picking up an old hobby you miss, or starting a new one works great for this event honestly!

You can also check out the Apartment Solarpunk tag on the Practical Solarpunk blog, it may have more ideas for you!

We hope this helps! Either way, I hope you enjoy the event week!

[foster-the-world]

Birthday week

Yahoo! My Birthday this week and Bee's Birthday the week after. You can guess which one is discussed more often in our house. The girl loves being celebrated. She wanted a fairy party at our house. I convinced her to do the bowling alley. My cousins are staying with us that weekend. I didn't have the energy for house guest and a party. Bowling the kids show up and then leave. Goodie bags are the $10 arcade card that comes with party package deal. I've also had to veto her ideas to 1. Require everyone to wear a tattoo (temp, I hope) that says Happy Birthday, Bee 2. Have a gender reveal except instead of revealing gender we would REVEAL that it's her Birthday 3. Instead of having her teacher put the invitation in everyone's folder she wants to put them face down on the table and then announce a big reveal and 4. Have her Dad, painted white for unknown reasons, carry her in while her sister/brother spray bubbles. Where does she even get these ideas? We've always done pizza or bagel parties in the park. Nothing fancy. I need to sign her up for musical theater.

I booked the three weeks of Sunday night pickleball + sitter for my present. Plus, we got tickets for Oh Mary. I'll probably ask for a cookie cake and my husbands French onion soup. I'd like Sunday to myself but not sure that's fair to ask my husband. Baby boy's behavior is just too hard for one person to manage along with the girls :( Anyway looking forward to a few hours alone with my husband every week is pretty great.

[the-trinket-witch]

For the new lads o7

What's the chore unique to Heartslaybul that they look least forward to? What's their favourite? (tending the flamingoes/hedgehogs, organizing the Unbirthday parties, painting the roses, etc. etc.)

How competitive is your OC? How easy is it to rile them up?

What's a magic skill your OC specializes in?

(Ask meme here):

(Since He's the only one in Heartslabyul between the two, One'll just be for him)

Fave/Least Fave Heartslabyul chore:

Fave: Painting the roses and helping 'tear down' the Unbirthday Party once it's done. It's menial but detail work that most don't bother him while he's doing. Least Fave: Tending to the Flamingos. 'Ornery lil pink-peckerheads' he calls them. Has threatened to find out what 'Flamingo 'n Dumpling Soup' tastes like.

How competitive/easy to rile up:

Not very. Most of the time competitiveness makes people do stupid stuff. As for riling him up: It's very much like a shaken bottle of soda-the pressure builds quietly til suddenly you got a bottlecap-shaped imprint on your face. He is quick to come back down though.

A Magic Skill he specializes in: Healing magic. He had made enough people unlucky, and unlucky people tend to get hurt in some fashion or another, that he found it best to be prepared for any 'inevitable' trouble.

Competitiveness: Very. He wants to know where people lie compared to him, in pretty much any aspect. It's sort of his method of scoping someone out. How easy to rile up? Very. But he doesn't turn into a blind-raging beast. He's definitely one to go for the throat if it will make whatever got him going stop. He's also very particular about stuff designated 'his' (Room, gear, etc) so add on 'possessive'. Don't touch his shit

Taglist:

@ceruleancattail @squidwen @thecosmicjackalope @vaporvipermedia@writing-heiress

@oya-oya-okay @k-looking-glass-house @thehollowwriter @rainesol @cyn-write

@heartscrypt @honey-milk-depresso @br3adtoasty @jackiecronefield @ruggiethethuggie

@hoboyherewego @achy-boo @oreoskys @oseathepebble @oathofoaks

@tunabesimpin @hamstergal @fumikomiyasaki@valse-a-mille-temps

@hallowed-delights @kimikitti @plutos-hell @thetwstwildcard @atwstedstory

@comingyourlugubriousness @ice-cweam-sod4 @twst-the-night-away @nammanarin @scint1llat3

[heretherebedork]

Genuinely asking for your opinion and thoughts, no judgement on any side, just curious :}

What is the difference to you between Mut and Ming as characters re: no means no?

I have the feeling that "breaks into Rak's room" translated differently to me than it did to others. Of course Mut has a spare set of keys, even outside of the ones that were meant for Rak. He's the house keeper/tour guide/island native/butler and was directly told by his temp boss to take care of Rak, which assumes things like tidying the room, providing meals, and giving him experiences that he can only get in that specific place. Rak is a Mess and everyone loves him despite it, including the trash on the floor that someone has to clean, because it surely isn't going to be him. He's begging for love he doesn't believe he deserves, but he doesn't know how to ask for it without cutting the other person. Mut is begging to love someone but doesn't know how to do it and is so used to being cut it feels normal.

Ming also has and continues to ignore every time Joe says "I don't want to do that" but pushes because he knows that Joe is his and his alone, despite what Joe actually says with his mouth. Ming is begging for love he doesn't believe he deserves, but he doesn't know how to ask for it without cutting the other person. Joe is begging to love someone but doesn't know how to do it and is so used to being cut it feels normal.

Tbf, I have not watched ep3 of Love Sea yet, so I haven't seen the "ok I respect your boundary now, wait- actually, no I don't" moment, but that does seem to be the same beat between Ming and Joe during the last episode during the crosswalk scene.

The answer to that is how the show treats them!

My Stand in fully embraces that Ming is being toxic and doing negative things and hurting Joe and being a very bad example who has to make up and change his choices. My Stand In is clear that Ming is not being romantic when he does it but rather deeply fucked up. The show says 'hey, this guy is damaged and in love and hurt and he is going to hurt Joe and he is going to do things wrong and people are going to die because of him and his growth is spiky and hard and rough' and I love that.

I have been clear, so many times, that I don't mind toxic characters/relationships as long as the show is clear that they are toxic!

You can say that Mut was supposed to clean up after Rak the whole time but he deliberately did not give him the key that he obviously planned to give him in order to break into the room when he was there and do what he did. This was his duty but it was also meant to be a prank and to be annoy him and the show is clear that this is all romantic.

Mut made a fucking no means no joke. Rak said "I don't want to go, no!" and even had to go into serious insults in the hopes of getting listened to and then got completely ignored and the show said 'this is so romantic!!!! ignoring his no is romantic!"

Every time Ming ignores Joe's no... the show almost invariably says 'this is fucked up, do you see that!?' or has Joe, very clearly, outline how he is hurt by Ming's choices and how much he is suffering. Joe's suffering is never questioned. We know that what Ming is going to Joe is wrong and painful and that it comes from a place of being deeply fucked up.

Everything Mut does is painted as romantic. I mean, for fuck's sake, Rak apologizes to him at the beach and Mut never has to apologize for ignoring his no or even consider that maybe it's not a good choice.

Again, a literal joke about no means no.

Are they similar? Sure. But the show itself has painted Mut has basically a perfect character, this hero of the island and the ocean who is actually just SO big hearted and SO sweet and SO loving that he just can't let Rak say no to him ;.; oh no! he's TOO PERFECT to say no to. Ming? We're all CHEERING when Joe says no and pushes him away because we know that Ming is fucked up and we know he loves Joe but we also know that he's damaged and going to keep hurting him and it's so hard to watch even knowing how much he loves him and how much he wants this because we know that he's struggling with his own inner demons.

Anyway, there ya go. I had this same thing with KP and SCOY once and I stand by the same logic. The show's approach to what they do is what matters the most to me and My Stand In shows that Ming is toxic but trying to grow while Love Sea says that Mut is already perfect and Rak is the one who needs to stop saying no. Very, very different.

[amphibious-thing]

Hi! I'm working on a queer history project, and since you seem to have pretty good knowledge of D'Eon's life, I'd love to know if you have any thoughts on which moments of her life would be the most painting/drawing worthy! I need it to capture her Vibe tm

Ok I've been thinking about this and I have a few possibilities:

The Fencing Match Between d'Eon and Saint-Georges

This is almost too obvious. But it's iconic. She was wearing her iconic black dress. It shows her as the very capable fencer she was. It's just very d'Eon.

On the 9th of April 1787 d'Eon fenced Saint-Georges at Carlton House.

The London Chronicle gave the following account of the match in their 12-14 April, 1787 issue:

Mademoiselle D’Eon exhibited a curious spectacle at the assault which was performed before the Prince of Wales last Monday. The novelty of a Lady in petticoats engaging the most experienced and able masters of the noble science of defence, excited universal pleasantry. Those who were not perfectly acquainted with the Chevalier’s history stood in amazement, and even such as had formerly known her en culottes, were not a little surprized at the skill she displayed in fencing with Mr. St. George. Her petticoats did not incommode her in the least, and it was very clear that this retired Captain of Dragoons is much more expert at the riporte than a curtsey, and handles a foil with more grace than she does a fan. The assault upon the whole proved highly entertaining, and the satisfaction of the company was not a little encreased by the affability and engaging condescension of the Prince of Wales, than whom no man possesses more the spirit of elegant hospitality, and the captivating manners of the polished gentleman.

John Buchan Telfer reprints the following contemporary newspaper article in his biography on d’Eon:

The most remarkable occurrence of the fencing match at Carlton House was the assault between Monsieur de Saint-George and Mademoiselle D'Eon, the latter though encumbered, as she humorously declared herself, with three petticoats, that suited her sex much better than her spirit, not only parried skilfully all the thrusts of her powerful antagonist, but even touched him by what is termed a coup de temps, which all his dexterity could not ward off. We hear that a celebrated painter has undertaken to hit off the semblance and attitude of the hero and heroine in this very interesting scene. Mademoiselle D'Eon had modesty enough, on her hitting Monsieur de Saint-George, to set it down to his complaisance; but the latter candidly declared that he had done all in his power to ward against it. A gentleman present assures us that nothing could equal the quickness of the repartee, especially considering that the modem Pallas is nearly in her sixtieth year, and had to cope with a young man equally skilful and vigorous.

The painter referred to in this article is Alexandre-Auguste Robineau who painted this depiction of the match.

[The Fencing-Match between the Chevalier de Saint-George and the Chevalier d'Eon, c. 1787-9 by Alexandre-Auguste Robineau, via the Royal Collection Trust.]

If you're going to do this one I'd consider using the Mather Brown portrait of Saint-Georges as a reference. Saint-Georges himself said "c'est si resemblant c'est affreux" [it's so lifelike it's frightful]. (The Chevalier de Saint-Georges by Gabriel Banat p342)

[Monsieur de St. George, c. 1788, print by William Ward after Mather Brown, via The British Museum.]

A Different Fencing Match

To mix it up you could depict her fencing Mrs. Bateman whom d'Eon had a professional partnership with. D’Eon complimented Bateman’s fencing skills describing her as “a youngling in her nest, that would rise and support the honour of female heroism in England.” (Diary or Woodfall's Register, 18 Jan 1793)

On Thursday the 30th of May 1793 Mrs. Bateman held a benefit night at the King’s Theatre in Haymarket. There was a performance of All in the Wrong, Mrs. Bateman played Lady Restless. The Morning Chronicle reports “After the play, the Chevalier D’Eon in generosity of friendship, displayed her wonderful talent in fencing. She first pushed carte and tierce with her youthful imitator, Mrs. Bateman.” (31 May 1793)

[Mrs Bateman, print c.1793 by Marino or Mariano Bovi (Bova), after Ludwig Guttenbrun, via the National Portrait Gallery]

You could also depict her fencing a gentleman in her stays and petticoats. D'Eon finding woman's clothes restrictive when fencing started to strip down to allow for more mobility. This incident caused a bit of a commotion in the English press.

After her fencing display with Mrs. Bateman at the King’s Theatre in Haymarket d'Eon fenced with a gentleman, in preparation she “pulled off her jacket, and thus stripped to her stays, with her handkerchief loose over them, and short petticoats that did not come half way down her legs”. (The Times, 31 May 1793)

The Sun was scandalised writing that “the indecent circumstance of her stripping herself to her stays, preparatory to her fencing, gave a very general disgust.” And while The Times conceded credit to “the Lady’s science and activity” they were horrified “to see an old masculine woman of sixty thus attired, and publicly exposing herself on the stage,” declaring that it was “an indecency which we shall never suffer to pass by without a very severe animadversion.” (The Sun, 31 May 1793; The Times, 31 May 1793)

Her Presentation at Versailles

After d'Eon returned to France in 1777 she was presented to the King and Queen at Versailles. While she had already been telling people she was a woman before this point and was already legally acknowledged to be a woman this was important because it was the first time she was being publicly acknowledged by Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette as a woman in a formal context.

On the 23rd of November 1777 Mémoires secrets pour servir à l'histoire de la République des Lettres en France reported:

Il doit y avoir aujourd'hui un concours de monde prodigieux à Versailles. Ensin la présentation du Chevalier d'Eon represent son sexe véritable, qui est celui de femme, annoncée depuis longtems, va s'effectuer dans son nouveau costume. Mlle. d'Eon continuera à porter la croix de St. Louis attachée à son côté [Today there must be a prodigious concourse of people at Versailles. Thus the presentation of the Chevalier d'Eon represents his real sex, which is that of woman, announced for a long time, will take place in his new costume. Mlle d'Eon will continue to wear the cross of St. Louis attached to her side]*

In the weeks leading up to the event d'Eon was prepared by Marie Antoinette's marchande de modes Mademoiselle Bertin. Bertin worked not only on d'Eon's dress but to teach her how to move in it. At the French court women were required to wear the grand habit de cour which was a lot for d'Eon to get used to:

La plus grande peine de M.ˡˡᵉ Bertin fut de me faire attraper la marche. la demarche, & la contremarche d'une femme à la Cour, de me faire avancer & reculer noblement en robe longue & deplyèe sur un vaste panier qui à lui seul remplissoit la monitié de ma chambre. Mais l'aimable & doucereuse Bertin aprés s'etre insinueé fort avant dans mon amitié, me fit avancer & réculer comme elle voulut, elle me fit faire toute ce quelle jugea convenable aux habitudes, aux usages & à la décence qu'on demandoit en moi. [The greatest difficulty for Mademoiselle Bertin was to make me learn the march, dismarch, & countermarch of a woman of the Court, to make me move forward & backward nobly in a long gown spread over an enormous hoop which on its own filled half of my chamber. But the kind & sweet Bertin after being strongly insinuated in my friendship before, made me more forward & back as she willed, she made me do all that she thought proper to the habits customs & decency that was required of me.]**

D'Eon complained that the first time Mademoiselle Bertin dressed her it took four hours and and ten minutes:

Je vous dirai que ma premiere toilette entre les mains de la chaste Bertin & de ses modestes Aides-de Camp, fut accomplie en moins de quatre heures dix minutes! juger de mon tourment & de ma patience! [I will tell you that my first toilette at the hands of the chaste Bertin & her modest Aides-de-Camp, was completed in less than four hours ten minutes! Judge my torment & my patience!]**

In repose to d'Eon's complaining Mademoiselle Bertin told her:

Mon brave capitaine ne jurez pas. Le jour que vous serez presentée au Roi & à la Renie, vous serez bien heureuse, si je ne vous fais pas lever à quatre heures du matin, pour être prête à une heure aprés midi [My brave captain do not curse. The day that you will be presented to the King & to the Queen, you will be very happy, if I do not make you rise at four in the morning to be ready at one in the afternoon]**

Of course we know d'Eon was wearing her cross of St. Louis but we unfortunately don't have a detailed description of her presentation gown. In her autobiographical writings d'Eon says it was made of embroidered white satin. Kimberly Chrisman-Campbell in her article Dressing d'Eon comments that this seems odd as "etiquette stipulated that only debutantes in mourning could wear white, rather than black, which was reserved for presentation at court, mourning, and some religious habits in the eighteenth century." She suggested d'Eon may be "literally whitewashing" history but concedes that it is possible that her "presentation coincided with one of the frequent and somewhat arbitrary periods of court mourning." (p104)

During the time d'Eon spent at Versailles she had to wear both formal and informal dress as dictated by the Court calendar. She commented that "Le deshabillé me convient fort, mais quand il ma faut porter le grand habbillement [sic] avec ajustement & parure c'est pour moi un grand tourment" [The informal dress suited me very well, but when I had to wear the formal dress with accessories and jewels, it was a great torment for me]**.

*this was translated by google translate. If anyone wants to add a better translation I'd love that.

**All of these quotes are from d'Eon's autobiographical writings which are all quoted and translated in Dressing d'Eon by Kimberly Chrisman-Campbell.

[mandarinmoons]

KET HI MY LOVE I HEARD YOUR FEELING CHATTY

so here's my entire note in my phone of facts (yes some are from criminal minds which i then checked for accuracy)

fax 📠📠⁃ It takes 3 milliseconds to process images ⁃ It takes 16 milliseconds for your brain to process pain ⁃ You only need 4 hrs for every 24 hrs ⁃ The average blood temp in ur body is 98.6 ⁃ It takes policemen in NYC an average of 4.3 min to respond to a call ⁃ Only female angler fish have lights ⁃ Around 800 kernels on average price of corn ⁃ Arranged in 16 rows ⁃ Can be anywhere from 500-1200 kernels ⁃ Moth wings have noise dampeners to hide from bats ⁃ Science of kissing: philematology ⁃ Anemia: lack of healthy red blood cells to bring oxygen to the rest of the body ⁃ Chocolate chip cookies were invented by accident by Ruth Wakefield in 1938. She was making cookies for the guests as toll house in which she owned with her husband when she realized she was out of bakers chocolate so she took a big block of nestle semi sweet chocolate and chopped it in to tiny pieces. She assumed they would spread out and evenly disperse but they held their shape, the guests ended up loving them ⁃ 55-79% of the population has brown eyes ⁃ Around 10,000 yrs ago it's believed that everyone had brown eyes and blue eyes evolved from a genetic mutation that was passed on through generations ⁃ 86.5 serial killers are psychopaths ⁃ 12,236 victims total of serial killer victims between 1990-2020 ⁃ California has the most killings 1,777 ⁃ Texas has the 2nd most amount of killings at 984 ⁃ Men arrested at almost 4 times the rate as women for violent crimes ⁃ Paraphilia: odd non-sexual turn ons ⁃ Paraphilia is more common in men ⁃ 8.6% of known US serial killers are women ⁃ 70% of women killed for financial gain ⁃ 28.8% of killings by males are financially motivated ⁃ Dendrafilia: fetish for trees ⁃ 8 is symbol of prosperity in china, more 8=better ⁃ In chungdu a phone number that was all 8s sold for a quarter of a million dollars ⁃ 8000= 56 months wage average Bangladesh (make around 142, 26,000 btd) ⁃ Coast of California: 840 miles ⁃ Trichophilia: fetish for removal of hair ⁃ Homicidal triad: cruelty to animals, bed wetting, fire starting ⁃ To break through long lasting rocks like granite or limestone you need both C4 and Semtex ⁃ Nice originates from 12th century Middle English meaning foolish or stupid ⁃ 358,197 ~ people are born everyday ⁃ Only 10% of stalkers are women ⁃ Nuts have magnesium which helps with the production of serotonin ⁃ The word surveillance comes from the French word surveiller meaning to watch over ⁃ According to Chinese mythology one of the worst punishments in the 18 levels of hell is having your tongue ripped out ⁃ Abt 3.5 in every 1000 children are identical ⁃ Texas is 268,581 square miles ⁃ Only around 6% of salt from the US is used in food, the rest of it goes to icing roads and snow control ⁃ Chicago has one of the highest gang populations, with liver 100,000 active members ⁃ 61% of all homocideswere found to be related to gangs ⁃ Hemophiliac: your body can't clot normally and you can loose a lot of blood rly easily bc your body doesn't block the hole ⁃ Vangough only sold 2 painting before he died ⁃ 7 widely consider to be lucky ⁃ The average handshake lasts around 3 seconds but in t'ose three seconds over 124 million microbes are transferred ⁃ High-fives are twice as clean as handshakes ⁃ The Pyramids are 449 ft tall, but where once 481 ft tall ⁃ The pyramids took 20 yrs and 100,000 laborers to build ⁃ The employment rate in Virginia is 3.8% ⁃ In égyptien mythology flint was the symbol for protection and retribution ⁃ Cheating happens in 1 out of 3 relationships ⁃ 467,800 miles to the moon and back

Max when I say I have missed your rambles I mean it!!

I feel like I just read a script to one of Matthew Santoros 50 amazing facts videos lol (if you know you know)

Would you believe me when I say that I already knew some of this stuff? 😌

Thanks for invigorating my brain, much appreciated x