#His Ex Girlfriend Wants Him Back Quotes

[lotusunique]

The Engagement pt.3

Armando Aretas x Black Fem! Reader

Hey guys I know this took a little while to come out but like I said, nothing but the best for my readers!

With that being said, this has strong themes of toxic relationships and major smut! Enjoy 🌺💋

I also wanna give credit to @zari-0115 she helped me write the smut scene so W to her! She’s the best

You knew he’d be here. You were told he’d be here. You just didn’t realize how much it would actually hurt. You didn’t realize the air would start thinning around you when you saw his new girlfriend wrapped around him looking like they were the happiest couple on earth.

You feel a tight squeeze on your hand before realizing Armando was standing beside you.

“C’mon”,he says,taking your hand in his. You sift through the crowded party, hand in hand, before finally making it through the balconys sliding doors. You put your hands on your knees , and attempt to steady your breathing.

“Look up and count to ten”,Armando lifts your chin up before turning your head to look at the view in front of you. You stare out at the beautiful picture. The sunset and the ocean colliding in a way that’s so gorgeous with the pool infront of you glistening. It makes you wonder what you did to deserve to see this.

“One.Two.Three. Four. Five”, you start to count,feeling the tension and anxiety fade away. “There you go, inhala exhala”,he says rubbing your arms softly. “Thank you”,you smile up at him.

“What’s with the panic attack?”,Armando asks. “I don’t know. I saw my ex and my chest just started like caving in”, you explain trying not to let the tears hiding behind your eyes, out. You take a seat on the cool pavement

“That blonde tonto wit the bad hair cut?”, he asks with a disgusted look as he sits next to you.

“Unfortunately yes. I don’t even know why I dated him. But when someone manipulates your heart, it’s hard not to fall for the fake version of them”, you sigh.

“Oh look at me sounding like a Pinterest quote and shit”,you laugh. “What happened?”,he looks over to you. “Well he didn’t physically do anything to me. But i just realized it was like he was jealous of what I was doing with work and when I finally had my own place it was like he hated me for it.”,you start to explain.

Armando’s blood starts to boil the more you talk. “I don’t wanna talk your head off about old shit tho”,you shrug. “Im here to listen”,he says geniunely.

You give a slight nod,“It got to the point where he would ridicule me for everything and belittle me. And at some point I started believing he was right. And I got in this really low place..I wasn’t eating, couldn’t sleep, didn’t even show up to work for a week.”, you sigh getting war flashbacks from arguably the worst time of your life.

“Why did Kelly and Dorn invite him if he did all that to you?”,he asks. “They don’t know about anything that actually went down. They just know we didn’t work out. After everything I still wanted to protect his image.”,you say fidgeting with your finger tips .

Armando grabs your hand, “promise me something”. You raise an eyebrow. “Promise you’ll never let anyone give you anything less than what you deserve”. He looks into your eyes, waiting for you to promise.

“I promise”,you nod. “And don’t let that dickhead fuck this party up for you okay.”,he says rubbing the palm of your hand with his thumb.

“Thank you again Armando. Like for coming and helping me with all this.”,You look over at him. The world is calm for a moment and it seems like it’s only you and Armando.

“I don’t know if this is dumb to tell you or not. But Armando I think I -“

You’re cut off by Armando smashing his lips into yours. You lean into the kiss as he cups your face. You two get so deep into the kiss that at some point your back is on the pavement and he’s on top of you. Without coming up for air the two of you deepen the kiss. Within an instant Armando falls over into the pool, the splash getting you wet.

“Oh shit”,you let out a loud laugh. He resurfaces,wiping the water out of his eyes. “Oh this is funny to you?”,he smiles up at you. “Oh no of course not. It’s hillarious”, you cackle. “Yea yea now help me out”,he sticks his hand out for you. He grabs on hold of your hand before he smirks and pulls you in next to him.

You resurface in the water, “no the fuck you didnt”,you laugh. Everyone walks outside hearing the commotion. “What is going on here”,Kelly laughs.

“Um nothing”,you giggle. “Who cares just jump in”,Marcus says pushing past Mike to jump in the pool. “Man you better watch my suit,”, He says, dead serious by the look on his face.

The two of you climb out of the pool as everyone files back into the living room. You make your way to you guys’s room as your wet clothes cling to your bodies. “You wanna shower first?”, you ask turning to him. “Nah ladies first”, he smirks over at you . You head into the bathroom,starting up the shower, getting the temperature just right. You loved the build of the bathroom. There was a huge see through shower with beautiful deep brown brick walls and a huge granite sink.

You peek your head out the bathroom seeing Armando snatch off the wet t-shirt. It’s not like he didn’t look amazing with the shirt on but got damn if he didn’t look just as good with it off.

You get into the shower feeling the warm water and bubbles up your skin. A wide smirk spreads across your face as a bright idea pops into your head. “Hey Armando can you hand me my towel I left it on the bed”,You call out.

“Yea sure”,he says putting the towel over his shoulder and walking into the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist. He walks in with his hand over his eyes. “Why don’t you move your hand and put them somewhere else”,you smile. He slowly removes his hand before looking upon your body and stepping into the shower with you.

He places soft kisses on your neck, tracing his hands up and down your skin. You let out soft moans as he scoops you up, causing you to wrap your legs around his waist.

In this moment you two were the only things that matter. He looks up at you, “Are you sure you wanna do this”,he looks into your deep brown eyes.

“Yes, I want you”,you say as a wide smile appears across your face. He smiles before kissing you so passionately.

He immediately starts fast, pounding into you with your back against the tile wall. He slides in you going deeper, until he hits your cervix causing you to yell out in pleasure.

Armando carries you to the bed, your legs still wrapped around his waist, before laying you down, towering over you he places soft kisses on your boobs, taking one of your nipples in his mouth and swirling his tongue around it. He enters two fingers into you causing you to arch yourself upwards with every touch. Your toes curl as he massages your clit. Just when you’re close to finishing Armando removes his fingers. You look down at him, your eyes meeting his, you all but beg for him to give you your release. He smiles up at you mischievously while taking his fingers and putting it up to his mouth to taste you.

He then lifts you up and turns you over like you weigh nothing. He slips himself inside of you and pounds in and out repeatedly. You grab hold of the pillows to keep yourself up right, squirming at each jolt you can hardly keep your ass up. “Hold on Mi Amor” he says instructing you not to finish just yet. Right when he feels you pulsing under him he slips himself out… yet again. “Why are you teasing me?” You whine. Armando doesn’t answer he just flips you over and begins to go down on you, alternating between his tongue and fingers devouring you while he pleasures your nipples with his other hand. He finally lets you release not soon after he enters you again for him to then be finished.

The two of you plop down onto the soft satin sheets, heavy breathing and giggling in between. “You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting to do that”,You smile over at him. “I’ve been waiting for that since the day I met you”,He says cupping the side of your face.

“You getting soft on me Aretas?”,you laugh. “You know ain’t shit bout me soft Mama”,He looks over at you with a sarcastic smirk. “Call me mama again and we gon have to may have to go run it back ”,You say before climbing on top of him, a mischievous smile across your face. “Let’s do it then mama”,he smirks up at you.

[holylulusworld]

Go to hell

Title: Go to hell

Written for @buckybarnesbingo (Round 6)

Card: B004

Collaborator(s): Holylulusworld

Square Filled: K4: "Oh, hell no."

Ship/Main Pairing: Mobster!Bucky Barnes x Ex!Reader

Rating: Mature

Major Tags/Triggers/Warnings: jealousy, ex! sugar babe trope, mentions of daddy kink (but no one is into it), groping, fluff, hopeful ending

Summary: He let you go.

Word Count: 1,3k+

BBB BuckyBarnesBingo 2024 masterlist

Written in Bucky’s PoV

She does it on purpose. I just know it.

Why else would she waste her beauty and grace on someone like him?

He’s old enough to be her father, and I’m sure she doesn’t have a daddy kink or daddy issues. I know her well, and she never showed any signs of being into men double her age.

She came here to my party with that man I despise the most. Not weeks ago, she was mine and screamed my name.

I said the wrong things after that night. I saw our relationship in a different light and had to make myself clear.

Now she hangs on that grandfather’s arm like a random arm candy, not the goddess she is. My girl always hated men treating her like a stupid bimbo. She is smart, and charismatic, but hides it well to play the perfect doll for this man.

I unclench my metal fist because, if I don’t, I’ll break that guy’s face. He leans closer to whisper something in her ear and Y/N giggles like a schoolgirl.

That’s not the noise she made when I whispered filthy things in her ear. She whimpered my name, and her knees buckled.

What she does with that man is all for show. She pretends to be with him to get back at me for not fulfilling her wish to make things between us official.

“If you keep in staring at her, you’ll hurt yourself,” Ayo smirks at me before turning her gaze toward the woman I was watching all night instead of enjoying the party. “I wonder how she ended up with him. I thought you and Y/N were going steady.”

“She was fun for a while,” I brush Ayo’s question off. I made my decision and won’t discuss it with people working for me. “Now the fun is over, and she can go out with whoever she wants to.”

“Says the man watching her all night,” ever the observant bodyguard she watched me all night only to find her boss staring at my ex-girlfriend…or rather sugar babe. “If that was my woman, I’d go over there and stab that old man’s face for grabbing her ass.”

“Grabbing her ass?” I jerk my head toward Y/N only to find her smiling at the guy. I exhale sharply when she pushes her ass into his crotch to grind into him.

Ayo dips her head to look at me. “It’s not too late, White Wolf.” She says before turning to take her place in the shadows to have my back like she always does. “Why don’t you go over there and show that little man whom your woman belongs to…?”

My shadow is not wrong. I could go over there and show that bastard Y/N belongs with me. But do I want to? If I step on that man’s toes, it means trouble. Even worse, Y/N will believe that I’m jealous of that old man.

“Ayo said you need my help.” I roll my eyes when Steve stands next to me. He tried to talk me into winning Y/N over the last few days. “How can I help you?” Steve smirks at me, like the cocky bastard he is. “Do you want me to bring her here? I can just throw her over my shoulder.”

“Why are you all so obsessed with her? I don’t want her back. She can fuck whoever she wants to. Even that old man’s dick,” I huff, and look away when she rubs herself against the man’s body.

“Do you want her to fuck him? Imagine she rides him, and he gets a heart attack,” Steve tries to be funny, but I can’t laugh. “She’s meant to be yours, not some old bastard’s toy.”

“She chose him,” I shrug. “And she won’t come back to me. I cannot offer what she wants from me.”

“A good dick?” Steve snickers.

“Commitment.”

“What did Beyoncé say?” God, I hate my best friend when he quotes songs. “Ah, yeah. If you like what you see put a ring on it.”

“You’re not helpful,” I sneer at Steve. “Stop quoting pop stars.”

“Punk. Beyoncé is not a pop star. She’s a goddess…” He grins before downing his drink. “If I had the chance with your girl, I’d put a ring on her finger.”

“You are a slut and love to whore around, Stevie,” I know Steve better than he knows himself. “You’ll never put a ring on a girl’s finger.”

“Maybe not her finger,” he gives me the dirtiest smirk in the history of dirty smirks. “I know better body parts to put rings on. I know that girl wearing a ring on her pussy lips.”

“I didn’t need to know that” I decide to get fresh air. If I stare at Y/N a little longer I’ll change my mind and break that old man’s face.

“Oh, hell no,” I hiss under my breath. All I wanted was to get fresh air, and now I’m staring at her backside because she had the same thought. She’s sticking her ass out, making her short dress rid up. I can see her panties, and my cock stirs in my pants. Treacherous bastard.

She turns around, and my stupid heart does somersaults when she looks me up and down. Y/N smirks, tongue poking out to wet her too-red lips. I remember she loved to leave my cock stained with her favorite color.

“You’ve got to be shitting me!” She exclaims loudly. “Where is he? What did you do to him?”

“I did nothing to your gramps. Why would I? It’s not as if he touched what’s mine,” I snap at her, and she flinches. I regret my harsh words because she turns around to not look me in the eyes.

“Well, then leave me alone. He’ll be back in a minute. At least he’s not afraid to show anyone that he loves having me around.”

She ignores me then, staring into the distance as I stand behind her to admire her ass for a little longer. “Why him?”

“Why not?” There was venom in her voice, but her shoulders shook for a second. “After you tossed me out, I had to get back up and move on.”

“By selling yourself to that slimy bastard?” I don’t know why, but I grab her arms to press her against my chest. “Tell me love.” I nuzzle her neck. “Does he fuck you as good as I did?”

“He needed someone to pretend he still got it. And I needed someone to take care of me. Love didn’t work out for me so, that’s all I get for the time being,” she answers honestly as I drop my hands to her waist. “A limp dick, and a man believing I’m nothing but a doll he can dress and show off.”

She holds her breath when I kiss her neck. “How about I remind you how good it feels to be taken care of by a man not giving a shit on you.”

“Oh, Steve will finally make a move?” I chuckle at her comeback. “I didn’t know he’s into me but why not? I’m free as a bird.”

“Come to my bedroom, doll,” she sighs at the pet name, but doesn’t give in so easily. “Forget about him.”

“I told you that I can’t do this with you any longer,” her voice trembles as she struggles to not give in to my advances. “Love wasn’t in your plans. You told me so.”

“What if…” I bite my tongue for a second and take a deep breath. Maybe she doesn’t care for the old man and his dick. But soon enough someone will come along to turn her world upside down. “I’ll put a ring on that finger one day?”

“One day?” She sounds surprised but allows me to slip my hand between her quivering thighs. I find her panties soaked, and her pussy in need of my touch.

“How about we talk about our relationship in my bedroom?” I purr in her ear. “I promise you won’t regret it.”

“I can’t leave him all alone.”

“You can,” I nip at her earlobe, “and will, baby doll. If you do, I’ll put a ring on that finger…”

Part 2

Tags in reblog.

[imtryingbuck]

Happy Ending

~ gif not mine credit goes to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader, past Steve x fem!Reader

Summary: Happy Ending that’s all.

Word count: 1,109

Warnings: swearing, my awful attempt at fluff and I think that’s it

Masterlist

 Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

You were wrong. About Steve I mean. Steve wasn’t the love of your life. The man sitting on the floor trying and failing to assemble a crib without instructions because and I quote ‘I don’t need instructions Y/N it’s not that difficult’. Him. He’s the love of your life.

You’re standing at the door to the nursery watching this beautiful man struggle and instead on offering help as you know for a fine fact he’d tell you no, you stand and watch. You look around the room and smile. Sam came over two days ago to help paint the room with Bucky whilst you were sat in the living room with Natasha and Wanda going through baby names both women argued with each other for ages about if the baby’s a girl to be named after one of them.

For 6 months you and Bucky dated without anyone knowing until Bucky asked if he could tell Steve as he wanted to introduce you to his newfound family as his girlfriend, you nervously agreed. Bucky came back to your apartment with a black eye and busted lip. Steve was furious claiming that you both betrayed him and when Bucky mentioned that Steve had dated your sister that was a betrayal, their argument had spilled out to the common room, and everyone was in shock not only to see the two super soldiers’ best friends arguing but to learn that you was Steve’s ex-girlfriend. Bucky threw the first punch after Steve made a comment about you which still to this day, he has never told you what that comment was. After meeting the team again things were going great, that was until you was going to the bathroom and walked straight into Steve an argument happens with him calling you all the names under the sun then apologising and proceeding to tell you how much he loves you. You tell him you don’t love him anymore; you tell him you wish him all the best and with that you go and sit next to Bucky.

Another six months go by, and you walk into your apartment and at first your confused you’ve walked into the wrong place when you take in the sight of your floor covered in rose petals and there’s candles lit up, as you walk further into your home you see Bucky standing there with a nervous smile. 

“Hi baby” he says.

“Hi Buck, what’s all this?” Your minds racing thinking you’ve forgotten your anniversary but that’s not for another two weeks.

“I had a whole speech I wrote but standing here looking at you I can’t remember what I wrote” he chuckles lightly. “So I’m just going to say this. Y/N I love you more than anything in this world. You are my happiness, my forever. I- woul- Will you marry me my love?” 

You didn’t even notice he had dropped to his knee; you didn’t even notice the ring, you didn’t even notice the tears rolling down your face as you nod spluttering ‘yes’.

Your baby was conceived that night.

When you told Bucky you was pregnant you was a nervous wreck, your apologising whilst he drops to his knees kissing your stomach over and over and then he’s thanking you for the best news ever. 

Three months later you and Bucky get married in the field that you had your first date, Tony is adamant he’s paying for the whole thing. Natasha and Wanda are both your maid of honour’s as you simply couldn’t decide. Sam is Bucky’s best man. Bruce and Pepper are running around making sure everything is running smoothly. Your parents and sister aren’t there as you haven’t spoken to them since Steve broke up with your sister. Your brother is there with tears in his eyes and he’s the one that walks you down the makeshift isle. Steve makes an appearance which makes your heart race with worry, thinking he’ll do something but luckily he doesn’t. As you’re exchanging your vows there’s not a dry eye around. You see Steve give Bucky a smile with a nod as you both walk past. When the night draws to an end you tell everyone that you’re expecting Baby Barnes everybody cheers. Steve asks if you two could talk and you agree, you walk into an empty room and he asks you if your happy you tell him yes so with a nod he tells you that he’s sorry for not doing right by you. He congratulates you for your marriage and pregnancy, he pulls you into a hug whispering that you will always be the love of his life.

Steve has to watch the love of his life walk up to hers and there’s nothing he can do about it. He lost you and it was all his fault.

The day Baby Barnes decided to make an appearance your husband is a nervous wreck which actually helps you with the pain as your too focused on him to register that soon enough you’ll be pushing a human into the world. After four and half hours of labour you give birth to the most beautiful baby boy. The doctor tells you to keep pushing as another baby is on its way, you and Bucky share a look of horror and confusion. You give birth to a beautiful baby girl.

As your sat there with your family the room starts to fill up with your other family. Like yourselves everyone gets a shock when Bucky shows them your daughter, wide eyes and laughter fill the room. 

The love of your life sits on the bed besides you with your daughter in his arms your son in yours and neither one of you can stop smiling. He tells you he’s so proud of you and repeatedly tell you how much he loves you.

You see the love of your life kissing another girl instead of your heart breaking it flutters. Bucky kisses Winnie’s face all over to make her release that delightful squeal whilst James Junior (JJ as Bucky calls him) is playing with his Captain America shield. Catching the love of your life attention you tell him your pregnant again he cries and tells you he’s so happy and so madly in love with you, the three year olds are confused but as soon as they see their parents laughing they follow along.

Sitting there later that night with the babies in bed yourself and Bucky take a minute to thank Steve for messing up and as Buck puts it ‘letting the most beautiful and incredible person walk away’.

You finally got your happy ending.

Tags: @bruher @cjand10 @themotherof10 @spngingerbread21 @behindmygreyeyes @hnnhbananananana @reguluscrystals @learisa @unaxv

~ banners credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

[fluff-n-cookies]

Randomly off the bat Dabi, Shigaraki and Spinner (separately) With a quirkless girlfriend Who has an Ex that wants to get back with her, BUT……. The ex turns that “HE BROKE UP WITH HER” because she “had no quirk” and that she was “useless to him”

(Those are the quotes she says to them while telling them the short version of the story) Dabi, Shigaraki, Spinner, deals with the situation themselves.

(I love those boys😍 and I thought it be a good idea story for you, so go crazy and have fun with it😅)

Okay, girlie, while I love the fact that you're sharing this stuff with me, I don't think you read this. the yellow paragraph. I hope you send this request to some other writers, @honeybubblebeeeeee is one of my personal favs. I do however like the idea of a reader having no quirk and being abandoned because of it, so I'll put a platonic spin on it.

AND I ALSO DON"T WRITE FOR SPINNER SORRY!!!

Reader was abandoned by their family after being born to a quirk marriage meant to provide children with strong quirks only for their first child to have no quirk. not wanting their reputation destroyed they abandoned our dear reader at 5 leaving her in an orphanage and a note to near come find them less they wanted a bounty on their head. (reader is now 16)

Dabi likes children, he likes how they have this innocent aura, he likes that they, hopefully, have not gone through the horrors he has. Hopefully. On the other hand, he hates quirk marriages, he hates hero's, in fact, I'd even say he hates fathers in general.

To tell Dabi that your relationship with your father or your mother is bad is to get them at the top of his hit list, VIP shit. Endeavor is just a couple seconds behind them.

but what hurts him more, what hurts him the most is if you actually believe them, if you push yourself through hand to hand combat, sniping, and other such practices not for the sake of improving yourself but to prove to them (not that they care) that you are not useless.

Oh how it pains him, to wake up in the dead of night to see your tear stricken face as you berate a poor punching bag to death on the roof. The wind is cool as you swing, and swing again. It's as if you dance for the stars of the night and the stars alone with not a thought for the trees or the mountains. Only ever the stars. 

The sting hurts, the impact of thinly wrapped fists against a leathery wall, but that anger that drains with it is enough to make the pain worth it, is it not?

That anger you feel, is an anger that Touya knows all too well. The type of anger that makes one want to yell of the heavens, yell that they are not a sinner despite being imprisoned in hell. He’ll watch as you swing with fury, fury of not being enough, fury of being thrown away like trash.

one man's trash is another's treasure though, right?

In that case, you're Touya's most darling treasure. Oh the urge to hold you close and tell you everything's going to be okay, as he pets your head, whispering promises of vengeance on your behalf. To give you a reason to smile.

Oh, it's strong.

Oh, the blood he's shed for you.

he won't say anything, if you see him get you water after you nearly faint from mental and physical exhaustion, no you didn't. if you saw him undo the bandages on your arms from training and replace them with new fresh ones, you're delusional. If you saw him stalking your family's socials and calling someone to leak their crimes, shhh, don't tell.

----

"I mean, yeah, you kinda are."

Was his genuine first thought.

I mean, what do you want him to say? that your quirk doesn't determine your worth, like what?

and darling, when I say correct him, I mean correct him, please correct him. Please look dead into his eyes and say "I'm not useless!". for when I say it will escalate, trust me it will Escalate.

this boy has never had a true friend, and on top of that, he was teased as a child for, well being him. So the moment he gets a friend, his heart will swell, for once he feels cherished, and my poor boy, he doesn't show it correctly.

he's just so happy to finally have someone to talk to and joke around with, but doesn't realize just yet what is a joke and what is not. so he'll keep pushing it, it supposedly is an "inside joke" so he'll keep doing it.

So please correct him! tell him that it hurts, and tell him lightly to not risk breaking his heart.

Because he wants to make you happy, he can't stand the fact that you go quiet whenever he calls you quirkless, and that you're progressively distancing yourself more and more. And believe me when I say, it's painful for the both of you.

Please be his friend, and please let him make you happy correctly, you are just so perfect, we can't have such a perfect thing so sad now can we?

---

yeah, done admist some weird shit, and did I mention that I'm a horrible writer?

[httpknjoon]

(re)starting over again | kth; 14

plot | Your four-year relationship with Taehyung was going well and strong. Until he was involved in a car accident, resulting to him losing some memories. By some, it means everything that happened five years ago. Things he remember? His friends, his bakeshop, and his ex girlfriend from the past. With that, you tried to keep up, restarting over again.

words | 4.9K+

genres | fluff, angst, amnesia au

pairing | taehyung x reader, hoseok x reader

note | *cue that tiktok sound* okay, guys. we're back. did you miss us? hi! I'm back with my monthly update 💀 I already outlined everything. there are six chapters left in this series (not including the drabbles). thank you so much for patiently staying around. i appreciate y'all a lot. let me know your thoughts, enjoy reading!

main masterlist | series masterlist

When did texting someone become so hard?

It has been exactly three days since Taehyung got to talk to you again. He offered to drive you home after your date failed to show up. You said yes. You two had a friendly conversation in his car. Like you were old friends, which you were. But were you? It’s complicated. For the first time in years, he heard your laugh and saw you smile just like in the photos he saw when cleaning up at your shared house. He remembered you waving at him with a soft smile on your lips before getting into your apartment building.

You also said you never changed your number and you would reach out. But he wants to update you about the small celebration the bakery will have later next week. He tried typing something but later erased it before he could even finish the first word. He doesn’t know what to type or how to begin a conversation. So he just typed a single character and hit the send button.

It was past six in the evening. You were already in your PJs after a long day at work. Treating yourself with dumplings and beef fried rice from the nearest Chinese restaurant in your area, you let yourself indulge while your favorite sitcom plays on your TV screen.

“You’re not easy-going, but you’re passionate, and that’s good. And when you get upset about the little things, I think that I’m pretty good about making you feel better about that. And that’s good too. So, they can say that you’re high maintenance, but it’s okay because I like…maintaining you.”

You found yourself pursing your lips when your favorite character said that line. It was one of the quotes that stays in the back of your head almost every time. You were about to reach for the remote control to play it back again. But your phone, which you set into silent mode an hour ago, vibrated. Your eyebrows shoot up as you read who sent you a message.

From Jung Hoseok

Hi, YN. I really regret missing our date last time. Would you be willing to give me another chance with a cup of coffee this Friday? I know a great cafe around the city 🙂

The day after he failed to show up at the restaurant, you woke up to a text message from Hoseok apologizing again. You reassured him that you understood and he promised to make it up to you. You didn’t really expect anything from that and thought that he would just pass by like your past dates that Martha set up. So seeing him reaching out again was unexpected.

You smiled as you typed a reply.

To Jung Hoseok

Will there be tea? I don’t drink coffee.

You see those three dots immediately popping in, indicating that he’s typing. So you quickly typed in a follow-up message.

To Jung Hoseok

Just kidding! I’m okay with Friday. Around 5 PM?

He was quick to reply,

From Jung Hoseok

Okay. Should I pick you up?

You thought you would just feel pressured if he picked you up at your home. So you just offered an alternative.

To Jung Hoseok

We can just meet there :) Just send me the cafe’s location.

From Jung Hoseok

[location pin] 

To Jung Hoseok

Thank you! See you this Friday then.

From Jung Hoseok

See you, YN!

That’s a date for Friday, which is a few days from now. Even though he reached out again, you thought of keeping your expectations low. Because it helps avoid disappointment. You probably learned after your last dates with those guys you met before.

You continued playing the episode you were watching. Not even five minutes later, your phone vibrated again. You thought Hoseok forgot something. But immediately after reading the contact name, you froze staring at your screen.

From Aaa Love

👋

Of course, you quickly recognized who it was. Suddenly, you felt a sense of nostalgia in your head after seeing that name for a long time. Years after keeping this contact hidden on your list, you totally forgot that you never changed his contact name even after the accident. You cannot even remember when you hid his name in your list. Maybe it was one of those nights you were drunk with friends and made some decisions.

Before replying, you renamed the contact.

To Kim Taehyung

Hi, Tae 🙂

While waiting for his reply, you recalled that night. You remembered feeling good entering your apartment even though your date didn’t show up. When Jisoo asked you how it went through a video chat, you said that the date didn’t happen.

“Then, why do you look happy?” she asked that time.

That’s when you snapped out of your daze, “D-Do I?”

“Yeah, you’ve been smiling ever since we got on this call.”

“Oh…” your lips formed a thin line before speaking again. “I… I saw an old friend in the same restaurant.”

The last time you and Jisoo really talked about Taehyung was still the time she showed up unexpectedly after her wedding. You cried, she cried.

“Really? Who?”

“Taehyung.”

You wait for her reaction and you gradually see her eyes widen.

“What? What is he doing there? Did you talk?” she asked with surprise in her tone.

“Apparently, he’s doing some business here. And yes, we talked. He offered to drive me home.” you shared.

“And?”

“It was nice.”

Your simple and short answer had Jisoo simply staring at you through the screen. It was like she was studying you. You knew she had a lot to say in her head based on her quiet reaction. But then, she just said,

“Okay.”

From Kim Taehyung

Hello, YN. Just making sure I have the right number here haha

Taehyung finally replied. You let the episode play in the background as you tap on your screen,

To Kim Taehyung

I told you I didn’t change it!

From Kim Taehyung

I know, I’m sorry hehe

Just by the text, you can imagine him awkwardly laughing as he says that. Before you can reply, another text popped in.

From Kim Taehyung

Btw the celebration will be in the bakeshop. Next Saturday, 2 PM.

From Kim Taehyung

It’s a late lunch event with friends and family. We’re hoping you can come 😊

Reading that, a smile formed on your lips. With you working at school, you are usually free on weekends. 

To Kim Taehyung

Will do!

“Can you put dinosaurs in it?”

“Of course, bud. Anything you like.”

Taehyung softly ruffled Jihoon’s hair, who remained focused on coloring his activity book. The little kid’s birthday is coming up soon and the preparations for it had begun. Since Jimin would be the one making the multi-layered birthday Jurassic-themed cake, Taehyung offered to make the cupcakes. 

A couple of toys, specifically, dinosaurs, are all over the table that Jihoon and Taehyung occupy. And ever since he arrived at the shop this morning, the kid kept talking about his favorite animal. Being the best uncle that he is, Taehyung listens while being quietly amazed by how much Jihoon knows about dinosaurs. 

“Ashley just sent a copy of the contract in our e-mail earlier. She wants us to review it first before finalizing.” Jimin spoke while placing an apple juice box on the table.

Jihoon scoots a little to accommodate his father sitting next to him. He stayed busy with his crayons. 

“Have you read it?” Jimin asked.

Taehyung shakes his head, “I haven’t. I think I left my phone on silent while doing those lemon tarts.”

“Well, I think you should read it. They put something they probably forgot to mention before.” his friend noted.

His eyebrows draw together before reaching for his phone. Taehyung immediately clicked on the file sent to him from Ashley. He carefully read word by word written in the document. He thought everything was already mentioned in their online meeting days after he went to Incheon. Until he read one of the sections of the contract.

Staffing Arrangements

The bakery agrees to temporarily assign one of its capable bakers to work at the restaurant in Incheon for four weeks, beginning on the first day of offering the pastries on the menu of the restaurant. During this time, the assigned baker will head pastry production, equip training for restaurant staff, and guarantee regular quality control. The restaurant agrees to cover the entrusted baker's salary, expenses, and even housing if demanded.

After pausing for a few seconds, Taehyung scanned his eyes all over that part again. Just to make sure he understood it right. He looked back up to Jimin, who had his arms crossed over his chest while waiting for a reaction from him.

“So?”

“This means one of us had to stay here while the other had to manage around in Incheon.”

September is usually dry and warmer in Incheon.

After living in this part of the country for around two years now, you already got better at predicting the weather and climate. But today, your predictions were proven wrong when you had to stay under a waiting shed while the harsh raindrops poured continuously. You were too confident that you left your umbrella at home.

4:12 PM

You looked down at your phone. It has been almost thirty minutes since you stood in this shed, waiting for your usual bus to arrive. But you don’t know why there have only been two buses that passed by. You were unable to get on any of those since both were packed, considering the unexpected rainfall. You tried booking a cab but there’s nothing around your area at the moment. Your friend, Aileen already left earlier with her husband while Martha offered to drive you home but you live almost twenty minutes away from her. So, you kindly rejected her offer. Again, you were too confident that you would be able to ride the bus quickly.

Puffing your cheeks, you began dialing someone’s number. He answered after the second ring.

“Hey, Hoseok…” you greeted.

He was quick to reply, “Hi, are you on your way? I’m driving to the cafe.”

“Yeah, uhm, I’m kinda running late for our date tonight.” you chuckled awkwardly, scratching the back of your head. “I’m sorry.”

“Oh, it’s okay. Everything alright?” 

“Haha, yeah. Just waiting for a bus to stop by here the school. It’s raining like crazy today.” you mentioned.

“Yeah, it is… you know, I can pick you up if you want to.” he offered.

Your eyebrows lifted, “Really?”

“Of course, YN.”

“Okay, thank you so much!” you smiled, finally.

“No worries. I’m on my way.”

“Okay, take care,” you said before ending the call.

With your plans of getting ready pre-date at your home canceled, you sat on one of the benches in the shed and touched up yourself quickly. You reapplied your lipstick with your front camera as your mirror. You ran your hand through the stubborn flyaways of your hair before tying it into the easiest half-up, half-down hairstyle you know. You’re still in your usual work clothes, a statement T-shirt (with a friendly and maybe corny quote written on it and jeans. Originally, you would wear something cuter. But this one will do. Even though the cool breeze makes you wish you wore something warmer too.

And less than five minutes later, a black Audi stops right in front of the stop. Your legs bounced restlessly. The windows were tinted dark so you cannot really see who’s inside. But the door on the other side of the car opened and there, you recognized the man from the pictures on Martha’s phone. Almost like sunshine, his smile as he made his way to you made you smile too. Your fidgeting legs had already calmed down as he stopped in front of you.

“YN?” He asked since this was the first time you two really saw each other.

You nodded, “Hi. You’re Hoseok, right?”

Although you were at ease with his arrival, there was still an awkward tension between you two. But it tones down when you two chuckled.

“Yes, nice to meet you.” he smiled again. He quickly noticed you hugging yourself. “It’s cold. How about let’s get you inside?”

“Sounds good.” you agreed.

Joining him under his transparent umbrella, your shoulders brushed against each other, and you could feel his warmth beside you. He opened the car door for you while ensuring no raindrop would touch your skin. You mumbled a small ‘thank you’ when you finally got to sit inside. You watched as he made his way back to the driver’s side of the car.

“Are you okay? Everything’s fine?” he asked immediately.

“Yeah, thank you again for picking me up,” you replied. 

“You’re welcome,” he replied before reaching for something from the backseat. 

Your eyes widened when you saw what it was. It was like your eyes sparkled as he handed you the small bouquet of yellow tulips, tied with a matching gold ribbon. 

“I’m really sorry for missing our date last time.” he apologized, watching you appreciate the flowers.

It has been so long since you received flowers. You cannot even remember when was the last time. So you cannot help but feel this funny feeling in your stomach while you look at the flowers. Especially since yellow tulips are your favorite.

“You didn’t have to. I understand why,” you spoke, tilting your head in his direction. Your voice was small and soft.

“Still, you waited for me alone in that restaurant. I cancelled last minute… Do you love it?”

“Of course, I love yellow tulips!” you exclaimed before taking in its subtle scent.

“I’m glad. I may or may not have asked Martha for help with those.” he chuckled.

Hoseok began driving while you find it more comfortable being around him. He has this infectious smile that brings more warmth in this rainy weather. It probably helps when he’s with patients.

“How long have you been waiting there?” he asked, starting up a conversation.

“Oh, you know, like half an hour.” you sneered at yourself. You hear him gasp. You chuckled, “To be fair, it is a rainy day. I can usually find a ride easily. I just didn’t expect that it would rain today.”

“It’s usually sunny at this time of the year,” he noted.

“It is. I was already waiting for the bus when the rain poured,” you told him. 

“I thought you and Martha usually go home together?” he asked, looking from the road to you for a quick second.

“Sometimes. But I feel bad for making her drive past her house for like twenty minutes,” you revealed. 

You tried offering to pay for her gas but she declined. Although she constantly assured you that it’s fine, you feel like an inconvenience, especially after a busy day at work. You are very aware it’s a you problem. But it’s just the way it is.

You shifted in your seat, “How about you? Did you have work today?”

He nods, “Ah, yes. I got off my shift earlier this day. Then went home to see my dog before dropping her off at my sister’s.”

“Oh, you have a dog?”

“Yeah, a senior dog but Mickey’s still the family’s baby.” he chuckled. “We take turns with her. Some days, she’s with me. Or my sister’s or my parents’.”

“So, you’re originally from here in Incheon?” you asked, curious when he mentioned his family.

He shakes his head, “No, we moved here when I was in high school. I left during college. Then, came back when I began working. I like staying close to my family. And you?”

“No, I moved here from Seoul two years ago.” you shared.

“And what about your family? They stayed there?” he asked.

“Nope, I’m an only child. My parents died years ago– Please, don’t say you’re sorry. It’s fine, it’s been so long.” you chuckled when you saw how his expression changed. “But I do have my Aunty Belle. She’s around the city too. She looked after me until I left to study in SNU.”

“You went to SNU too?” Hoseok exclaimed.

You beamed, “Yes– Wait, we’re here?”

He laughed, “Yeah.”

Distracted, you didn’t notice the car arriving in front of the cafe Hoseok talked about. He told you to wait for him, leaving the car with the umbrella. He opened the car door for you and helped you with the umbrella. He does the same thing when opening the cafe’s front door for you. And when a bell clangs when the door opens, you get reminded of your favorite bakeshop back in Seoul.

“I’ll be having iced americano and a slice of carrot cake. How ‘bout you?” Hoseok turned to you as you two stood in front of the staff.

“I’ll have green tea and banana muffins,” you answered.

After ordering, you two sat on one of the empty pearly white tables and chairs near the glass window while waiting. It was a well-lit place. It has a minimalist and clean aesthetic. Hoseok sat across you, tapping his fingers along to the music playing in the background.

“So, what made you agree to do this blind date?” you asked him.

“Well, I’ve been single for the last three months and I never really tried blind dating before so I said yes when Martha told me about you,” he answered.

“Well, I hope she said nice things.” you two chuckled.

“Don't worry, she did.” He assured you. “How about you?”

“Martha had been setting me up for blind dates these past few months because I’ve been single ever since I came here in Incheon. The last dates I went to were unsuccessful so she promised that this one was gonna be great. So I agreed for the last time.” you told him.

“And so far, how is this one going?” he asked cheekily.

You pretended to think for a second, humming as you rubbed your chin. He laughed.

“It’s going great. You get plus points for my favorite flowers.” you smiled.

“Even though I didn't show up last time?”

He seemed really apologetic about that. He brought it up again for the nth time even though you already told him countless times that it’s okay.

You puffed, “Hoseok, it's fine. I really do understand. I used to work at a hospital, things can get a little spontaneous. No worries about it.”

A staff member came with your orders. She carefully placed your drinks and food on your table. You can feel your shoulders relaxing as you feel the warmth of the tea on your tongue when you take a sip from the cup.

“How was it?”

You smiled, “Nice. Perfect for a rainy day. How did you find this place? I don't think I ever reached this part of the city.”

“This is the only open cafe I see whenever I get off from my shift very late at night. I love their coffee here.” 

You nodded while taking a bite from the banana muffin you ordered. And you quickly recognized its difference from your usual banana muffin. You look at Hoseok who's enjoying his cake.

“How was it?” he asked, pointing his fork at your muffins.

“This feels a little dry and the texture’s a bit rough,” you whispered, not really wanting the nice lady at the cashier to hear you.

You don't want to be critical. But you just got used to having a soft and fluffy banana muffin or even bread with the right amount of sweetness in it.

He leaned a bit forward, mirroring you, “Really?” 

“Yeah, seems like it had a lot of flour,” you added before offering him one of the muffins.

You watched him take a bite and chew on it. After gulping it down, you wait for his opinion.

“It is dry.” he nods before putting the muffin down. “You seem to know a lot about bread. Do you bake?”

No, but I know someone who put his heart out and is a perfectionist in baking.

Instead of saying that, you shake your head.

“Oh, no. But I do love a lot of bread and pastries. I just know friends who bake back in Seoul.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. We probably didn't get to discuss that in the meeting we had.” 

Taehyung, along with Jimin, sat at the same table since that morning. Jihoon’s mom already picked him up earlier and the shop was already sold out by 5 PM so they closed early. Now, they are just having a call with Ashley about the contract.

“So, it means that based here on the contract, you want one of us to stay there in Incheon to oversee the pastries.” Jimin clarified.

“Yes, we just want to make sure that the quality of the products will be the same as what you have there in Seoul. Also, we thought that it might be better for our crew members to personally learn about it from the baker himself.” Ashley explained through the call set in loudspeaker mode.

Jimin looked at Taehyung who nods with that. This time, Taehyung has a question.

“You said that there would be a salary?” 

“Yes. There would be a separate salary for the baker who will be staying here with us for four weeks. And since traveling from Seoul to Incheon can be a hassle, if you want to, we can also provide temporary accommodation with complete furniture. My husband runs a condominium business here so the accommodation would be on one of his buildings.”

Both of the men’s jaws dropped with that information. Their eyes were wide as they met each other's gaze. They definitely didn't expect that information from her. They were unaware of how rich she was. They just know that she runs a great restaurant in Incheon.

Jimin cleared his dry throat, “Okay, thank you for clarifying it. But we hope you can still wait before we sign the contract since me and my friend still have to talk about it.” 

“Sure, of course. Just reach out to us whatever your decision is.”

“Thank you. Have a great night.”

As soon as Jimin ended the call, the two exchanged looks.

“So?” Taehyung began.

Jimin shakes his head, “I can't. Jihoon just began going to school. You know what my co-parenting arrangements with his mom are.” 

Taehyung nods. After learning about Jihoon’s existence, Jimin wanted to make up for those years he missed. He was hands-on in everything that his son takes part in. He is also helping Jihoon’s mom in looking after him since she is currently working in a nine-to-five job.

“It's fine with me. I went on vacation there once. It's nice there. Plus, we can split the salary.” He commented. 

And he didn't really have any obligations here in Seoul. Unlike his best friend. It would be easier and better if he went. Jimin can manage the shop while taking care of Jihoon. Taehyung is flexible in working everywhere. 

“It would also be nice to stay in a new place.”

“No, but the living finances in Seoul are really more expensive than here.”

You don't sure how long has it been since you and Hoseok arrived here in the cafe. You already finished your tea while the ice on his drink has already melted. The only muffin left was half-eaten. The plate of his carrot cake was already on your after he let you finish it when he noticed that you liked it after giving you a taste.

“It is. That's also another reason why I came back here.” Hoseok exclaimed. “I can't stand living with another careless roommate again.”

You laughed when he referenced his bad roommate experience he told you earlier. Hoseok has been funny and nice ever since he picked you up today. He talked about Mickey, his life back in Seoul, and a little bit about his family.

“But you said you stayed in Seoul after graduating, right?” he recalled.

“Yes, I did.”

“How? Did you live alone?”

“At first, I became roommates with my best friend there, who’s also a nurse. That lasted for a couple of years... Then, I moved in with the guy I was dating at the time.” You told him.

“Like in his apartment?”

You shake your head, “We bought a house.”

His jaw dropped, “You bought a house? In Seoul?!”

“Yeah, we did some research and saved up for it starting from our first anniversary. Apparently, foreclosed properties are cheap there.” You shared it like a fact.

Taehyung was the first one to bring up the idea of living together a few weeks before your anniversary. After talking about it, you two did some research and went to a lot of open houses. Then, you found out about foreclosed properties. Taehyung and you looked in about four foreclosed houses before landing on the one you called home. 

“What happened to the house after you broke up?” He asked.

You purse your lips, “He's living in it. But we agreed to talk about it soon.”

How soon is soon though?

“So it was a good breakup?”

“Yeah. I guess so.” 

The last sentence was almost a whisper by the end. You cleared your throat as if something was stuck in it. It was your turn to ask.

“How about you? How was your last relationship?”

Hoseok leaned back on his chair, crossing his arm over his chest, “It was great for the most part. We’ve been together for only one year. I actually proposed to her.”

Your eyebrows scrunched together, “Really? What happened?”

“We had a lot of misunderstandings in the last months of our relationship. It can be about everything. But mostly, she gets mad whenever I have an emergency in the hospital and I understand that. So one day, we harshly broke up during a fight before I left for work.”

“So it's a bad breakup?” 

“Yeah, a bit bitter.” He sneered. “But at least I don't share any property with her.”

It was a teasing remark to lighten up the mood. You grimaced and rolled your eyes. He laughed.

“The lady was too kind to ask us to go,” you said as Hoseok drove.

The moment you and Hoseok realized that the rain had stopped and the sky was already dark, you two got up and left. Hoseok insisted on paying, even playfully threatening to throw your wallet away if you ever pulled it out of your pocket.

“I’m sure she doesn't mind. She gave us free cupcakes.” He replied, pointing to the box resting on your lap.

“Are you sure you don't want to take this?” you asked because he handed you the box as soon as the lady gave it.

“Yeah, just update me with your review about it. I'm interested to hear more about your thoughts.”

You bit your lip from hearing that, “Okay.”

After a few minutes of listening (and singing along) to songs that played in his stereo, you arrived in front of your building. Of course, Hoseok opened your door for you. He helped you with the bag you brought to school so you could carry the flowers and cupcakes.

“Should I help you to your apartment?” He asked while you slid your bag into your arm, struggling. 

You gave up, letting him take your bag and the cupcakes, “Okay. Come in.”

You opened the door to your building and led the way to the stairs. He assured you that he was okay as you kept on looking back at him. And when you unlocked your apartment, you turned around.

"Do you want to go inside? Water, juice, or anything to drink?” You offered before putting the things on the counter near your door.

He smiled, “It's fine, I can't stay for too long. My next shift is at nine. I just want to make sure you'll make it to your door without dropping any of those.”

You looked down at your watch, “Oh my god. It’s already past eight. You should go! I should've taken a cab.”

“YN, it's okay! It's still early.” he chuckled. “Plus, I had a really great time talking with you.”

Your stomach flutters, looking at him. You noticed the same smile you saw earlier.

“I hope this isn't the last time we'll go out.”

You nodded, “Of course. Martha did it right this time.”

“How about next weekend? Sunday?” he asked.

“Sure, I’ll be back from Seoul by then.” 

His eyebrows raised, “Really? I’m going to be in Seoul for a conference on Saturday. When are you coming there?”

“The same day! I’m going to visit some friends.”  

“Maybe we can go there in Seoul together? So you don't have to commute.” He offered.

“That sounds good!” You agreed before looking down at your watch again. “But I think you should go now. I know you still have to do stuff before going to work.”

“Okay. Let's just talk about it later.” 

“Okay. Thank you for the flowers and everything, Hoseok,” you state before leaning in to give a quick kiss on his cheek.

He smiles, “You're welcome, YN. Tonight was great.”

“Text me when you make it to the hospital. Drive safely! Good night.”  You said as he walked back.

“Good night, YN.” He waved before walking down the stairs.

You closed the door to your apartment before leaning your back on it, looking at the yellow tulips on the counter.

What a lovely night.

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[undying-love]

Quotes to think about

"One of my feelings even when he used to lay into me was that he really didn’t mean it. I could always see why he was doing it. There was this attempt [on John’s part] to get rid of the spectre of me, which I understand, because he had to clear the decks just like I did."

"Then also we were like married, so you got the bitterness. It’s not a woman scorned this time, it’s two men scorned — probably even worse. And I had to make way for Yoko. My relationship with John could not have remained as it was and Yoko feel secure."

"Really all that happened was that John fell in love. With Yoko. And so, with such a powerful alliance like that, it was difficult for him to still be seeing me. It was as if I was another girlfriend, almost. Our relationship was a strong relationship. And if he was to start a new relationship, he had to put this other one away."

"I understood what happened when he met Yoko. He had to clear the decks of his old emotions. He went through all his old affairs, confessed them all. Me and Linda did that when we first met. You prove how much you love someone by confessing all that old stuff. John's method was to slag me off."

-----------------------------------------------------

I don't think we pay enough attention to these crazy statements made by Paul and how telling they are. What guy needs to put his relationship with his "friend' aside so he can be with his girlfriend? "If he was to start a NEW RELATIONSHIP, he had to put THIS OTHER ONE away". I'm sorry, but WHAT? And why did John needed to "get rid of Paul's spectre" in order to be with Yoko? What did Paul mean by "John confessed all his old affairs to her...his method was to slag me off". Is he implying that he was one of John's "old affairs"? It seems like he is not very aware of how revealing his words are.

Based on these quotes I think it is quite reasonable to assume that theirs wasn't a platonic relationship. And I don't get why so many people think that it was one-sided on John's part and that Paul rejected him romantically. Paul was (and still is) obsessed with John the same way John was obsessed with him. And you seriously think that two guys who are obsessed about each other would wait more than 10 years (from 1957 to 1968 in India) to make a move? (Btw, I dont think India was as much of a turning point as people think, as they were reportedly still very close while they were in New York a bit later). People who knew them have all made many suggestive comments about them, as well as many biographers. Clearly something was going on that was not platonic or one-sided. And let's not forget John screaming at Yoko "I wish I was back with Paul" during an argument. What does that imply? It does not make sense to yell at your wife that you wish to be back with a "friend" while you are having a fight, right? Saying you want to "be back" with someone sounds like wanting to return to an ex.

[jokeroutsubs]

ENG translation: If we believed that we were "kings", that wouldn't be us

An interview with Bojan Cvjetićanin for Slovenian newspaper Delo, originally published on 24.12.2023. Audio version by IG GBoleyn123

Original article is available here for Delo subscribers. Original article written by Lucijan Zalokar for Delo; photos by Jože Suhadolnik; English translation by a member of Joker Out Subs, native proof reading by IG GBoleyn123.

If you repost quotes from the interview, please link back to this post! And if you repost the photos, do not crop out the photographer credit.

With Bojan Cvjetićanin about the international breakthrough of Joker Out, the movie Kaj pa Ester?, about life on the road, football, sociology…

I met up with Bojan Cvjetićanin in Ljubljana's Stegne industrial zone, where the members of the popular pop rock (in their jargon: shagadelic rock'n'roll) group Joker Out created a rehearsal space for themselves two years ago. "Lately we've been on the road a lot, but this is still a great second home. If only you knew about the parties that happened here. There were fifty people dancing downstairs," he proudly looked from a small gallery towards the space that measures approximately thirty square metres. Even though the clock had just struck three in the afternoon, the 24-year-old Ljubljana resident had a long day behind him, which had been entirely dedicated to media obligations.

In journalistic circles, we often hear indignation about how modern day influencers - especially those who had gained their influence on social media - have no books on their shelves. Joker Out are first and foremost musicians, of course, but with 150,000 followers (Bojan's personal profile has 190,000) on Instagram, we can count them among the big Slovenian influencers. And there are plenty of books on their shelves.

I don't want to falsely portray the popular fivesome as enlightened donors to the Slovenian literary market: most of the books resemble those you can buy for little money in second-hand bookshops, or even get for free at library write-offs, but they still deserve praise for both the aesthetic sense and the content.

I also don't want to falsely portray the books as the only notable objects in the rehearsal space. There are also the golden plate for the Eurovision single Carpe Diem, which got over two million streams in Finland, a transfusion bag (Rh-) that Tomi Meglič¹, Cvjetićanin's biggest teenage idol, personally brought to them, and a small shop's worth of props given to them by fans: pillows with hand-embroidered patterns, plushies, bras with Instagram accounts written on them, various sweets, you could even find a vinyl from a Soviet cover band of The Beatles. If things continue like that, they soon won't have any space left for instruments, but those are just sweet worries. Joker Out, who were formed in 2016, are currently conquering Europe in a way that the Slovenian music scene has never seen before.

¹frontman of Siddharta, whose third album was called Rh-

I've heard that you approach your job with the utmost professionalism and that you wake up at five in the morning for media obligations.

That's true, today we started early in the morning in Maribor. The first few hours were the most tiring because we were constantly changing locations and driving around the city. After the third or fourth activity, we relaxed a little because we got to the studio. After that, everyone started coming to us instead of the other way around.

Slovenian cinemas have started playing the movie Kaj pa Ester? in which you play a boy who enrolled in high school just to get close to his ex girlfriend again. Did you have any problems with trying to get into the high school mentality?

We filmed the movie two years ago, when my memories of high school were much more fresh than they are today. But on the other hand, I played a boy who had just finished the ninth grade of primary school, so I had to put myself into the shoes of a primary school kid, which is much harder. We're also pretty different personality-wise. But almost the entire cast was around the same age, so too old. We joked about that a lot during filming.

Still, that's nothing unusual in the movie world.

Of course, there are 35-year-olds starring in High School Musical and no one is complaining.

Could you draw any parallels between a musical stage performance and filming a movie? You have to play a kind of role during a concert too...

I have to admit that it's completely different. On stage, I never feel like I'm performing. Of course I am actually performing, but I'm still in the role of myself, Bojan, whereas in the movie, I'm someone completely different. It might be easier to compare filming a movie with recording music in the studio, but there are big differences there as well. The biggest one is that for a movie, the director has the main and the final say. You have to trust him. When you film a scene, you don't even see what you've filmed for a long time. The movie in which I play one of the main roles will be played in cinemas, and I don't even know what I will look like on the big screen. It's different with music, because us authors listen to the songs a hundred times, a thousand times; we're the ones who make all the final decisions. That's quite a mental leap, but I didn't have too many problems with it, because I knew the previous projects of that team. V dvoje ('In a tandem') is my favourite Slovenian TV series. On the other hand, I needed time to get used to this new method of working. If I asked to see the scene we'd filmed one more time, but the director said it was good, we kept filming without hesitation.

You said that on stage, you are always in the role of yourself. Does the nature of that role change from concert to concert? And what influences it? The audience, the outfit…

The outfit has an influence for sure. More than I initially thought. Lately we've been playing with our stage look a lot and looking for the right combination. I currently find that the outfit suits me very well, it's just the shoes that bother me because they're too rigid. I have to change them. They're huge and massive, which makes me feel like I'm clumsily marching around the stage, whereas during rehearsals I wear sneakers and I'm therefore a lot more in the mood for dancing.

What about the language you sing in? Many people say that they feel as if by switching between different languages, they are also switching between their personalities.

I agree. When you change the language, your voice has a different colour and register, you come up with different jokes than in your mother tongue. If I lead a concert in Slovenian, Serbian, or English, I'm a different dude every time. This is also influenced by my notion that each time, I'm performing for a different group of people who are connected by a certain mentality. In Slovenia, I'm performing as a local for locals, and I feel like there are different "game rules" than for example in Croatia or Serbia. Elsewhere, I feel like I don't even think about this.

How did you get the idea to start creating and singing in English? You already broke through internationally with Slovenian.

Us creating in foreign languages isn't so much a result of wanting to break through internationally and the mentality that only English ensures global success. If we thought that way, we wouldn't have gone to Eurovision with a Slovenian song. We're primarily driven by a desire to learn new things, to push the boundaries... In the studio, it's similar to being on the stage. If you change the language, you're not only a different person on stage, but also inside your head. Your creativity is different. Playing with languages is actually also playing with your own creativity, because you enter a different space, a different mentality. The song Sunny Side of London could not have been made if we hadn't mentally transported ourselves to an English-speaking space. We want many more projects like that, not necessarily in English.

Can you be more specific? What kind of mentality do you associate Sunny Side of London with?

That song is a sort of homage to all the people who have suddenly become part of our story. Sunny Side of London has nothing to do with London as such. I was looking for a name of a well-known place with which to name all our concerts, and I decided on London.

The first time I said the words Are you guys real? – Is this really happening, are you really here and singing our songs? – on the stage, certain English phrases snuck into my mind. What the hell is going on? and so on. We also experienced, for the first time, foreigners coming up to us and talking about their own experiences connected to our music. That was something completely new for us. We listened to all those stories in English, as our fans of course can't speak Slovenian, even though they can sing our Slovenian lyrics. Sunny Side of London therefore emerged as a collection of all the experiences and stories that fans told us after gigs.

You've already touched on fans who sing your lyrics by heart from Finland to Spain. Could you highlight the nation with the best ear for the Slovenian language?

On the latest tour, when we visited Lithuania, Poland, Czechia and Croatia, there were moments when I felt like I was singing in Slovenia. In Prague, I filmed the audience singing Umazane misli without me. As if I were in Križanke, for example. But it's even more fascinating that people sing well in England and Nordic countries too. It's understandable that our Slavic brothers have the best ear for Slovenian, but northerners aren't far off either.

How much of your international success do you attribute to the Eurovision performance?

A huge amount.

If you had to express it in a percentage?

99.9.

Really?

Definitely. It was an incredible catapult. Whenever I ask the audience at our international concerts if anyone was already with us before Eurovision, a few hands shoot up every time, but those are rare exceptions.

How do you explain the fact that you finished in the relatively humble 21st place in Liverpool, but your visibility still grew in leaps and bounds?

We were very, very, very dedicated to the Eurovision project. We put a lot of time and energy into demonstrating to the people who were open to it that we weren't just a three-minute performance, but very much an existing band that has made many songs and that lives on stage. With time, and of course in connection with the Eurovision performance, more and more listeners got to know that. We clearly showed them: we are here, we are real, try it, connect with us.

Because they had so much different content available, this actually happened. I think it was also because they saw that Joker Out really was made out of five completely regular dudes from Slovenia who live a totally normal life, and at the same time we make music and have a great time doing it. That is already a slight deviation from what's been happening recently, when we're being bombarded from all sides by messages that we need to distance ourselves from each other, that we have to hate each other...

That was the sociologist in you talking.

That's true. The atmosphere in society nowadays is such that it emphasises individuality more than building a team. Young people, however, need and want to be part of a community. And we offered them that chance.

Where does your interest in social sciences come from? Your father is a gynecologist, your mother a pediatrician, and you have a degree in sociology.

I had a very good professor in high school. If you wanted to listen to him, he offered a lot of knowledge. Even though sociologists often think about society in an abstract way, the subject always felt tangible to me. I recognised it in very concrete life situations that I was trying to understand. At my final exams, I did a great job with sociology with very little effort – and then made a mistake and enrolled in economics. I wavered between those two options from the start, and in the end, what tipped the scales were the warnings of many people I knew that sociology doesn't have good employment prospects. I gave in to the pressure and very quickly realised I had made the wrong decision. I gave up on economics after the first semester. That was when I seriously threw myself into the band, we made Gola, and then I transferred to sociology and there was happiness all around.

You clearly won't work as a sociologist for a while yet, if ever...

But I am a sociologist.

In your soul?

No, as my profession. Us musicians are sociologists. A lot of sociological terms could easily be transferred into our environment. Locale, for example. In third year, the professor asked me several times: Well, Cvjetićanin, if you have a concert, is that locale or something else? And then I said it was locale and started rambling on. (laughter)

So you are a singing sociologist?

Exactly.

How do you explain the success of Joker Out from a sociological point of view? How do your songs address the zeitgeist?

I write the lyrics exclusively based on stories that really happened. Not necessarily to me, but to people I love. Therefore, I have a strong emotional relationship with the subject matter. My opinion is that there will always be people who will connect with the story if it's real. Because it's easiest for us to connect with real emotions. Our songs are love songs, they talk about finding yourself and personal growth, some are socially critical... I think that I have managed to find the right balance between being direct and being poetic.

I'll word it differently. The Beatles already sang about love and personal growth. And they weren't the first ones by far. Later on, those same themes were covered by hundreds of successful bands and an infinite number of slightly less successful ones.

I think that nowadays, we most often associate societal changes with technological development. Technological advances largely dictate the rhythm of our life. But those advances are mostly just a substitute for something that already existed in the past. The basic emotions have therefore certainly stayed the same. Love, fear, hatred... I think that the use of language is very important here. Even though the emotions don't change, the way we put them into words does. In music, too. I don't sing about a topic the same way my peers would have in the 1970s. Consequentially, our relationship with emotions is changing and evolving as well. As if our entire society is gravitating towards the point of holding the belief that it's better for an individual to feel less and less, and in a more and more censored way.

On the one hand, excessive use of social media and other media causes us to feel like distinct individuals. On the other hand, it connects us to the world and places us into a very wide picture. In every moment, we are only a click away from becoming cosmopolitan and being able to access all the information, events, and people, but at the same time, that's exactly what reminds us that we are a small and actually not very important dot on this planet. The magnitude of everything that's constantly available to us makes us feel small. I think that we mostly listen to, watch, and use those who manage to poke the spot that unnerves people the most in this context. If performers manage to break through the firewall of someone's VPN, then those people will also show their interest in an analogue way. Otherwise, they will only be a swipe away.

And now a question that's more psychological than sociological: do you ever try to get into the heads of the people who time and again show their interest in very analogue ways?

I have an infinite appreciation for their dedication, because for myself, I don't see the chance of a phenomenon exciting me so much that I would be ready to dedicate so much time and love to it.

So you've never been a very hardcore fan?

If, at twelve years old, I had to highlight one musicians that I would've wanted to meet more than anyone in the world, that would definitely have been Tomi Meglič. That hasn't changed to this day. The only difference is that we meet up with Tomi and we're friends. I still feel the highest possible level of respect for him. Every time he calls me, I am extremely proud of myself. But I still cannot imagine going to, say, Berlin tomorrow if Siddharta were playing there and I had a free day. I'd go to Maribor or Zagreb, but absolutely not across all of Europe the way the biggest fans do. Not even at twelve. I could sooner imagine that at that age, a football match rather than a concert would be the thing that excited me beyond all reason.

We're probably talking about two groups of celebrities that get worshipped as deities by the masses in Western society: footballers and pop and rock musicians. And this is probably linked to emotions again.

True. The thing that wakes up a person's sense of smell, sight, and all other emotions that overcame them as a child, is what has the best possibility of succeeding.

Now please explain how this is connected to football.

If I go to a concert by Siddharta, Big Foot Mama, Magnifico, I turn into a ten-year-old kid who will explode from happiness. There's no Bojan anymore. He gets lost. It's the same with football. When I watch it, I dream about how I played for Slovan² as a kid and what I wanted more than anything was to score a goal and for everyone in the stands to yell: Yeeeees!

²ND Slovan is a football club from Ljubljana

You don't score goals, but you are in a similar position that Tomi Meglič used to be in.

All the band members come from very loving families that have always provided us with a very good support system and instilled basic values in us that we internalised deeply. That is why everything that's currently happening around us hasn't gone to our heads in a way that would make us think that we're bigger or more important than anyone else. If we started believing that we were "kings" because everyone was clapping for us and singing our songs, that would probably be a very strong feeling, but that simply wouldn't be us. We mostly love to see all the people, because we know how much we mean to them and how much they mean to us. Without them, we wouldn't be able to focus on what's most important to us – our music. On the other hand, I can say with a thousand percent certainty that I would easily and happily do my job if I was performing at venues like Cankarjev dom. So, in front of a calmer audience, without unreal hype.

But what I would like most in the world is to turn into a footballer for ten seconds and score a goal at an important match. You know why? Because that is the biggest adrenaline hit that exists. When we perform on various stages, there's mayhem around us for two hours straight. But in football, when a goal is scored, that happens in a millisecond. You go from nothing into total chaos. Everyone loses their minds. I'd love to experience that. Well, I did – much like everyone who played football in primary school. When I scored a goal for Slovan and a hundred people in the stands clapped for me, I felt like I was on Maracanã. Imagine what it would be like to experience that on the real Maracanã.

It's interesting that you highlighted a loving and stable family background. Many of the biggest pop and rock stars in the world grew up in a diametrally opposite environment. From John Lennon and Janis Joplin to Prince and Rihanna. There are actually so many of them that we can talk about a pattern.

I know, because I love to read their (auto)biographies, and I agree with your assessment that their family circumstances are fundamentally different than ours. That is always my answer to the question when someone wants to know how debauched our tours are. When I tell them that we mostly drink water and tea on the road, they just can't believe it. But it's the truth, because we've realised three things. First, we enjoy what we do immensely, and from the experiences of many musicians, we know that you can almost definitely forget about a long career if you start doing everything that we perceive as the proverbial rock'n'roll lifestyle. A band like that breaks up sooner or later, either because of frayed nerves, or exploding egos, or because of money. Second, we've all had to go to work hungover and we know very well that it's unbearable. I especially can't imagine how we could stay healthy and keep our strength and our voice if we were constantly hungover on the road. In that case, the only short-term solution is drugs, which we fortunately [knocks on wood] don't do. And third: I'm sure that you have a much better time on stage if you're aware that you are on it.

Your international breakthrough doesn't have a precedent among Slovenian musicians. Would you dare to point out where the difference is, why you made it and not for example Siddharta, who had filled Bežigrad stadium and later did not hide their international ambitions?

We have to understand that Siddharta didn't have the chance to perform at a festival like Eurovision. It's hard to understand what it means for 160 million people to watch you. That is a bizzarely huge number. All this happened in the time of social media, and we had set up a pretty good mechanism in that area even before Eurovision, and then also used it, whereas Siddharta established itself as a band in the time of analogue media. I can't even imagine how it would've been possible to break through abroad from Slovenia at that time. Because even we are already – even though some things have opened up for us very nicely and we've been joined by the right people – finding out how much of an investment going international demands. Dreams of megalomanical earnings and a luxurious life brought on by a European tour shatter quickly. Even when you start filling up venues, you stay in a kind of hustle mode. You fight. Unfortunately, the costs in the music business are so high that performing abroad is more or less just for promotion for a long time.

You're probably thinking of logistical costs?

Yes. Some of my colleagues have total misconceptions about our earnings. They think that we're literally swimming in money, while we actually earn what amounts to a normal salary.

In March next year you will have eighteen concerts. You will start in Helsinki and end in Milan. How will you travel?

With a tour bus. We've rented it twice so far: for the UK tour and for the tour around Lithuania, Poland, and Czechia. There are beds on it, so we can sleep while driving from one concert to the next. The tourbus is prohibitively expensive, you pay almost half of your royalties for it, but it's the only way for a musician with such a packed schedule to survive in the long run. Sometimes people ask me why we don't travel with a van instead, but you have to understand that we sometimes have concerts two days in a row and the venues are 800 kilometres apart. If we spent all night in an uncomfortable van, then looked for a hotel in the morning and so on, we might be able to endure it for a week, but definitely not all month.

Do you ever sleep in a hotel?

Only on free days.

Will the March tour be your most exhausting one so far?

It will definitely be one of the more exhausting ones, but I am definitely happy that we will be able to sleep on a tour bus. We haven't been on a month-long tour yet, so it's hard to predict anything, but on the Nordic tour this year we played six concerts in five days, because we had two concerts in one day in Helsinki. We didn't have a tour bus there, we flew instead. That meant that after the concert, we got to the hotel at midnight, then we had to be at the airport at three in the morning, a few hours later we were already at the new location, we napped for two hours on a couch, had a soundcheck – rinse and repeat for five days in a row.

Let's not talk only about the negative sides of tours…

Of course. I love sleeping on the bus! I fall asleep like a baby who's being taken for a walk in a stroller. I can't sleep more than nine or ten hours in my bed at home, on a tour bus I easily get twelve hours. Maybe it's because it's constantly shaking a little. The other guys also sleep very well on the road.

But the most magical thing on tours is when I visit a city for the first time just because we have a gig there. That seems unimaginable to me. To meet new people, wonderful fans, to bond as a band, experience new, funny situations, to bring home a bunch of new inside jokes and incredible gifts that fans have made themselves. [Points towards a hand-embroidered pillow in the part of the studio where they keep the gifts.]

Elite athletes often lament that it's true that they compete all over the world, but they often only see the airport, the hotel, and the sports venue.

It's similar for us. When we travel with a bus, we only see the venue. If we happen to have a free day, we walk around the city, but we definitely don't visit all kinds of tourist attractions as some people might wrongly imagine. When we go to Paris, we definitely won't go to the Louvre, and we will see the Eiffel tower through the bus window if everything goes well.

But you meet a lot of interesting people.

That's true. I find it the most fascinating if we meet fans when we don't expect them at all. In a restaurant, on a plane… When we were flying to Poland, it turned out that one of the flight attendants was a big fan of ours. She told us that she was going to three of our concerts and brought us champagne and a model of a Lot Polish Airlines plane.

I was even more surprised in Helsinki. I went to some kind of dark club that had a techno music party. Suddenly I was approached by three people, two guys and one girl, and they told me that they were our fans and that they couldn't believe that they met me in that club. I also couldn't believe that people recognised me in the middle of Helsinki. What's going on?!

In the summer, you took a step back from Instagram for a while. What brought you to that decision?

Many things. I felt creatively empty. I also, for the first time in my life, experienced the internet – not just Slovenian, but global – being completely oversaturated with me. That started negatively pressuring me and eating me up. I thought about it a lot, and the first time I asked myself whether I'd be less Bojan Cvjetićanin if I didn't have an Instagram profile, I turned it off. Immediately after that, I wrote three songs; I felt as if I had cleaned up some of the mess that had built up recently. I returned to social media some time ago; with much healthier habits than before, I think.

How do you see social media? As a space for playfulness, for promotion, part of the job, part of private life?

I think that at the time when they started killing me, I perceived them too professionally. I had a feeling that Instagram was a platform through which I had to achieve all sorts of things. Lately, I prefer to joke around more.

If you repost quotes from the interview, please link back to this post! And if you repost the photos, do not crop out the photographer credit.

[agendabymooner]

keeper ! alex a. x ofc (kpop idol!ofc)

"and she my backup like to say she was my plan b. kinda ironic 'cause with her, i'd start a family."

summary: in which polly jintara berkshire, whose friend was an ex of an f1 driver, juggles her role as a blackpink member and alex albon's girlfriend. OR this is just a series of photos showing how down bad the couple are for one another ❤️

content warning: chatfic + tweets, use of explicit language, a lot of dirty jokes (nothing graphic), alex albon is a blink, references to stormzy songs, fluff

note: the title and quote is referring to my favourite tobi and manny song. anyway enjoy xx (i hope my jokes are funny enough)

masterlist

tagged blackpinkofficial, boamckinnon, thepolsci

liked by nicholaslatifi, jennierubyjane, roses_are_rosie

alex_albon kicking my feet when thepolsci pointed and winked at me tbh 😍😩 have my kids pinned by alex_albon

thepolsci no U HAVE MY KIDS 🥰 liked by alex_albon

landonorris absolutely shameless

georgerussell63 this isn't who we are, alex 🤦‍♂️

user1 bro who did you even go with 😭

alex_albon latifi 😊

user2 WHAT ARE YALL DOING IN A BLACKPINK CONCERT EVEN 😭

user3 alexander albon, driver on sundays and a blink every other day 💖

user4 lad i think it's a spider not a snake?

user5 shhhh don't ruin it for him. he's just being himself <3

user6 i just want him to show up one of these days in an interview and begin bonking the other drivers with his light stick like pLEASE ALEX

williamsracing cool stuff alex, but why didn't you take me there -logan liked by alex_albon

alex_albon big kids only, sorry mate. i'll bring the merch to you tho!

tagged thepolsci, ygentertainment, blackpinkofficial

liked by jennierubyjane, boamckinnon, logansargeant

user1 NO ALEX YOU LOOK COOL NEXT TO HER

user2 we gotta humble him- booooo get back in the car albono

charles_leclerc tell her she's very cool liked by alex_albon

alex_albon she doesn't need reminder 😎

jennierubyjane do we go to you for free marketing?

alex_albon no, you'd have to give me pols for the whole year then i can do free advertising

williamsracing this is not what your pr manager taught you and you know that alex

roses_are_rosie don't worry, your level of coolness heightened a little! liked by alex_albon

alex_albon phew! i thought i brought her down to my level tbh

thepolsci don't say that to yourself, you utter dickhead

alex_albon ily

user3 YES ALEX!!!! STREAM MONEY FOR CLEAR SKIN

alex_albon my real skincare routine is money on loop 🎼

thepolsci when we reach 8 figures you can have my kids liked by alex_albon

alex_albon are we talking combined salary for the next few years bc we can start the process now???

oscarpiastri touch grass

logansargeant this is not who we are alex

tagged thepolsci

liked by pierregasly, lance_stroll, danielricciardo

user1 MAN IS THIRSTY

user2 AND HE'S OWNING HIS THIRSTINESS

user3 now this- this is the standard

user4 are you talking about the picture or the guy who posted it?

user3 yes.

thepolsci screaming crying wailing

thepolsci on my knees frfr 😩😭 liked by alex_albon

alex_albon stay there 😇🏃‍♂️

user5 ALEX ?!!!

user6 MAN IS DOWN BAD

user7 if my gf is a baddie and a keeper i'd be down bad too 😭🤭 don't make fun of my boy like that

tagged alex_albon

liked by logansargeant, roses_are_rosie, jennierubyjane

user1 tbh a trip to paris doesn't hurt 🤔

user2 i want him or i want to be him idk 🧐

user3 ain't no way these two just made stormzy references on their posts

user4 girl serenaded alex with sidemen diss tracks before it's no wonder she posted this with a uk rap song 😭

user5 THAT'S PEAK LMFAO

alex_albon never!!!! liked by thepolsci

thepolsci ily bitch

alex_albon aren't you the sweetest 😩

thepolsci say it back 🥲

alex_albon thx buddy 🤩

thepolsci nvm i h8 you

user6 this is an emotional rollercoaster wtf 😭😭

[jeansplaytoy]

Complaining. - Ony 4

<<part three part five>>

slight arguing, mentions of cheating and feelings (mild), no proofread, i’ll edit it whenever. sorry for the waittt!

you rubbed your eyes, slipping your white painted toes into your fluffy slides. you weren’t even drunk last night but for some reason, that headache just bothered the hell out of you.

“shittt.” you whispered to yourself. you checked your phone and the time. 10:47am. you stretched before standing up, stretching your legs and making your way to the bathroom. you grabbed a towel, running warm water under it before washing your face lazily. you brushed your teeth, went to your room and grabbed your phone.

you made your way to the living room, sitting on your couch, waiting for something to happen. it was a weird feeling, like empty. you can’t say you’d never felt it before, but this time you were just bored. and you were rarely bored.

but conveniently, as you were scrolling through apps on your tv, you got a phone call from an awfully familiar number. you pursed you’re lips together, frowning slightly before answering. “who is this?” was the first thing you asked.

“damn, you deleted my whole number too?” ony spoke on the other line.

you sighed, rolling your eyes. “boy what you want? ain’t yo girlfriend somewhere near you?” you asked. “just because we… quote on quote “date” don’t mean we live together.” ony mumbled. you hummed. “yeah okay.” you muttered.

“so wassup witchu?”

you paused for a minute before answering. “ion know. but i gotta talk to you about something, ony.” you said while playing with your nails. “ight, speak.” ony said in between a yawn.

you quirked a frown before leaning back on your couch. “we need to talk about some shit going on between us because-“before you could even finish, your phone started vibrating and it was a facetime call instead of an audio call. you smacked your lips and answered it with a frown, making ony laugh. he was still in bed, he looked tired.

“my bad, i just wanna see you when you talk. keep going.”

you squinted for a few seconds. “anyway, as i was sayin. we need to talk about some shit between us because i feel-“

all of a sudden, there was a loud ass sneeze and you frowned. “ony what the fuck is wrong witchu?”

“it’s allergy season bruh please.” he rubbed his nose before sniffing and chuckling. “ight keep going.”

you smacked your lips. “nevermind dude just… you wanna come over today?” you asked while rubbing your forehead. ony raised his eyebrows. “like… for what?” he frowned a little. “so we can talk. cus apparently you don’t know how to listen without making dumbass sounds.”

“can we get sum to eat if i come?”

~

so there you were, sitting in the passenger side of your ex boyfriends car, downing a burger and large fry with a drink. as he drove, he glanced at you from time to time, raising his eyebrows at the way it looked like you just feened for food.

“you ain’t eat today?”

“nah.” you mumbled, taking a bite of four fries and looking at ony with furrowed eyebrows. “you must got a problem or sum?”

“you in my car.” he nudged your arm and you continued to eat your food, staring at him. “ion care.” you said, grabbing your drink and sipping through the straw. ony hummed. “so what you wanna talk about. you know my girl ain’t gone like us together.” he sighed, leaning back a little. you frowned and looked at him.

“i’m just playing, damn.” he laughed. “but for real wassup.”

“we need to get our shit together, that’s what. cus i’m not finna be fuckin on you tomorrow and then we have a lame ass argument the next day.” you glanced at him, passing him a fry. “and ion want yo lil bitch to be mean mugging me, but i’m not gon say too much cus she ain’t did too much yet. but that shit you said about her being a replacement, it just made me feel like you wasn’t really talking to me for me, you was just talking to me cus you wanted to brag or sum.”

ony pursed his lips together, putting the car in park as you both sat in an empty parking lot. “so you tryna say i was only talking to you to let it be known that i could easily replace you?” he frowned softly.

you shrugged, finishing your burger. “i mean, i really hate yo ass. i do. but you having her as my replacement? you gotta do better than that. you making it seem like i’m ugly or sum shit.”

ony smacked his lips and rested his eyes at you. “you know you not ugly, i know you not ugly. don’t do that. and how was i posed to find somebody finer than you?”

“you cheated on me with her, ony. then you brought her around the around the group expecting her to just be invited like we all ain’t been friends since bout middle school and her ass just now coming.”

you turned in the seat to face him. “and then the hoe kept staring at me when she saw me and you talking like she had a problem or sum. wassup wit that? i mean i get why she mad, you talkin to the girl you cheated on to get with her, but she ain’t had to look at me like that-“

“why you always shit talkin?” ony stared at you. but it wasn’t a bad stare. it was more like a genuine question stare.

“huh?”

“you too cute to be worried bout what these hoes got going on or what these bitches think about you. i told you bout that.” he said as his eyes continued to rest on yours. he did tell you about that.

you opened your mouth to defend your actions, but nothing came out. it was like ever since you broke up with him, you’ve just been in that same grumpy mood for the whole time.

“you ain’t ever act like then when we was together, you was a lover girl.” ony smiled a little.

“but you cheated on me and i got mad. and ian gone lie, i been mad about that shit for a long time.” you looked at him. “and it’s annoying seeing you with somebody else that think they better than me or sum. i can’t tell nobody but you that.”

“why?”

“cus that’s embarrassing.”

ong smacked his lips. “i’m sorry for doin that to you. ion got no problem wit apologizing. but ion want you to bottle up yo feelings until i come around cus we not even together.”

“and ion want you to be around me as a secret and then start acting different in front of yo girl.” you raised your eyebrow at him. you might’ve been feeling some typa way, but ain’t no way you was finna sit here and feel bad about shit because she was in the way of you and ony getting back on good terms.

ony rubbed his face. “ion act different. that was only when i expected you to be more mad.”

“but you’ll flirt with me one minute and then be a whole other nigga when you get around her.”

“cus that’s my girlfriend.”

“you don’t even like that girl.”

“says who?”

“me, nigga.”

“who the hell is you to say ion like her?”

“why you always tryna argue wit me?”

“cus i love yo ass.”

you paused in your words and pursed your lips together, slowly staring to smile. “you still love me?” you asked. ony stared at you for a few seconds before rolling his eyes. “duh, why you think you in my car?” you slowly nodded. “so that mean you cheated on me wit that bitch for nothing. when you breakup with her, then we can start back talking, but for now? aw nigga you outta luck. now take me home.”

“bruh y/n-“

“take me home, ony.” you said before finally turning around in the seat and buckling up.

the ride home was silent, but not awkward. it wasn’t like you were mad at each other, it’s just that nobody had nothing else to say. you bit the inside of your cheek, looking around the car. you opened the glove compartment and a perfume bottle rolled out of there. it was yours.

you opened it and smelled it. “i was lookin for this.” you mumbled, looking at ony.

“keep it in there.” he glanced at you.

“it’s mine.”

“that’s the only thing in this car you still got, bruh. lemme keep it.” he mumbled, nudging your cheek. you smacked your lips and put it back.

“you better be glad i’m not as mad as i was.”

[sunlightandsuffering]

I'm not sure if this is long enough for me to bother posting it as a chapter, BUT MORE SACRILEGE FOR THE PPL AND BC THEY'RE SO CUTE AND UNHINGED !!

Does Eren feel great about corrupting the local church’s youth group leader and shining example of chastity? No, not really, in fact, his mother would probably murder him for it if she ever found out. 

But in the meantime, he’s sure stories of his ‘new girlfriend’ and possible marriage prospect will mollify her.

Or at least he hopes so, but regardless, that is the least of Eren’s problems. His biggest problem is the pain in the ass cadet he’s been assigned as a partner for the last week and a half of Armin’s paternity leave and said local churchgoing sweetheart’s ex-boyfriend. All in all, Eren has embroiled himself in a plot quite fitting for the church. He can see the headline now, ‘Local Cop Seduces Innocent Church Girl, Leaves Hopeful Cadet Destitute’.

“I hate him,” Jean is muttering darkly from Armin’s desk across from him, fidgeting with his pen in agitation. If only Jean knew that Eren is the ‘him’ he’s referring to. Instead, he’s simply been subjected to a singular break up text, and several quotes about the bible and forgiveness splashed across Mikasa’s instagram story. 

If Eren weren’t in the middle of it he’d find the entire plot amusing, but he doesn’t want Jean to become more irritating than he already is. 

The rhythmic click, click, click of Jean’s pen clicking is what finally sets Eren over the edge. “Leave your personal shit at home, Kirstchein, we have a job to do and that paperwork isn’t going to complete itself.” Jean looks like a kicked puppy as he turns back towards his paperwork, appropriately chastised by his superior, and for a split second Eren almost feels bad for the man. 

But then Mikasa sends him a nude, and he doesn’t feel so bad for the asshole anymore. 

Shoving his phone into one of the many deep pockets of his standard-issue cargo pants Eren stands up, imposing compared the heartbroken cadet in front of him.

“We have shit to do Kirschtein, we’ve got a drug bust in an hour and you’re fucking moping. Get it together.” 

Jean glowers for a moment before booting up his now sleeping computer again and Eren sighs, heading towards the break room to grab a snack, he truly does not get paid enough for this shit. 

How old is he? Seventeen? Because that’s the kind of teenaged nonsense he’s dealing with from his cadet, it’s ridiculous. He grumbles mostly to himself as he snatches a pre-packaged rice krispy treat from the communal bowl on the counter, this is how bad it is, he’s actually fucking eating carbs and sugary ones at that. Whereas Eren is typically infamous for following his regimented diet, continually topping the leaderboards at every physical training camp, Jean’s drama has stressed him out so much that he’s actually fucking eating sugar. 

Eren tears the blue wrapper apart with his teeth before ripping into the sweet treat with dark intent, stupid fucking cadets and overdramatic church girls. Stocking back into the main office space Eren promises himself no more bullshit, from here one it’s police work only. He doesn’t get paid enough to deal with this shit on the job. He’s about to give Jean another lecture, hoping this time it’ll stick, but as he approaches their desk clump he finds Jean on his phone, a looking of absolute betrayal on his face. “Jean what the fuck are you looking at I thought I said–” Eren snatches the phone from his hands only to find Mikasa’s god-damned Instagram story. The cute little icon of her face lighting up the corner of the screen along with a large pink background and some sort of cursive looking font splashed across the screen. “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”

James 1:5

Fuck. The pink image switches as the story runs out, and suddenly the screen is black, lit up with pink writing as another bible verse is proudly proclaimed across her story. 

“Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”

Psalms 37:4

The screen changes again and Eren groans, handing the phone back to Jean who can only be describes as looking utterly betrayed. His pain in the ass little churchgoer has been posting passive-aggressive bible verses on her story all morning from the looks of it, splashes across her social media in varying shades of pink. 

Eren checks his own phone curiously, only to find there’s another notification from said little churchgoer, and from the looks of it, it’s probably another nude. 

God what the fuck has he gotten himself into. “I’m sorry Eren, I just - I can’t, we were together for four years! She was going to give me her virginity, we were going to be each other’s firsts.” Eren winces at that particular comment, because he’d taken Mikasa’s virginity rather spiritedly on the altar of their church, had actually fucked the lord right out of her he’d like to think. Although, judging by the mess of bible verses painted across her social media, there’s at least a little bit of religious insanity left in her. “I have to make a call,” Eren tells Jean abruptly, leaving the cadet to wallow, “Get your shit together by the time I come back.” 

Eren barely makes it outside the precinct before he’s holding the phone to his ear, Mikasa’s number dialed already and ringing insistently. 

She answers on the third ring, sounding breathless, “Eren–” “The bible verses Mikasa? Really?” He’s utterly exasperated and he’s sure she can tell by the way she sighs on the other end of the line, “I just think it’s important that the rest of my community knows that breaking up with Jean was God’s will Eren.” “Mikasa I fucked you on the altar okay, that wasn’t God’s will, I was horny and that was good fucking weed.” He can practically feel her scowl on the other end of the line, “God never gives us more than we can handle Eren, and now I have my ring, it was all his will. The congregation just needs to understand that, and so does my youth group.”

“You couldn’t just tell them you found someone else?” 

Mikasa gasps in affront over the line, “He gave me a promise ring Eren, it’s highly frowned upon within the community to rescind commitment so easily.” 

“You rescinded it pretty easily for me.”

“Because I knew God sent you to me, to put me on the right path.” “You’re absolutely unhinged, you know that, right?” There's silence for a moment, and then there's a breathier quality to her voice as she taunts him,“I’m also not wearing panties.”

“Did God tell you not to?” Eren quips right back, and Mikasa chuckles throatily on the other end of the line, “Can you come home on your lunch break?” 

Eren glances at the clock, cursing at the time, he’s spent far too long talking to his pain in the ass girlfriend. “No, I have to get back now, stop posting bible verses on your story and keep looking at your other university options Mika, I want you to get in on time.” At this, he can feel her wilt through the phone, she’s been stressed as hell since her falling out with her parents and subsequent break up with Jean. As a consequence she no longer has a full ride scholarship to Shiganshina bible college and she’s been stressed about schooling ever since.  Not that Eren had any desire to encourage that particular path of schooling, but he doesn’t want to derail her entire life, doesn’t want to be the mistake she looks back on as the reason she doesn’t have a career or didn’t go to college. 

Since accidentally stealing Jean’s girlfriend Eren has found he more than cares about the religious spitfire, might even love her, just a little. She may be unhinged as all hell, and devout to the point of delusion, but at heart, she’s a good person, if not a brat. His girlfriend had just been a little… misguided. 

She’d worked hard to get into nursing school, and Eren will be damned if he’s the reason she doesn’t get into another one. “Baby,” He intones and Mikasa sighs loudly, “Fine, I’ll work on my cover letter again.” He catches himself as a smile quirks at his lips, “Stop sending me nudes and send me the rough draft, I’ll look at it after my drug bust.” “Oh my God, you’re so boring.” “Don’t take the Lord’s name in vain Mikasa,” He sing songs, and she growls on the other end of the line before hanging up. Maybe God really doesn’t give people more than they can handle, who is to say? Whatever, Eren doesn’t believe in any of that bullshit anyway. He turns back towards the precinct, phone tucked into his pants, “Kirschtein you’d better not still be mooning over that crazy religious nut you call an ex-girlfriend.” 

He is so totally going to hell. 

She shows up at around dinner time, eight hours into his twelve-hour shift, and firmly destroying any hopes of having a peaceful Wednesday night catching up on paperwork. 

She’s balanced delicately on the edge of his desk, glowering at Jean like he’s the one who’s wronged her. 

And even at eleven on a Wednesday night, she’s scantily clad, dressed in ripped jeans and a low cut scoop-neck sweater that catches Eren’s attention immediately. Because just like the first time he met her, her cleavage is eye-catching, his girlfriend’s tits are the stuff of wet dreams, the kind of breasts you show to plastic surgeons as inspo pics. 

And Jean is fucking staring at them. 

Was Mikasa Jean’s girlfriend first? Yes, yes she definitely was, and he has no doubt that despite her previous virginal status that Jean has ample experience with her rack. Doesn’t stop Eren from being pissed off that his douche canoe cadet is staring at his girlfriend’s rack. 

Jean is looking at her with simply too much interest, lust shining in his eyes as he looks her up and down, unable to look away from the plump milky tops of her breasts. 

Eren won’t have it. 

They’re arguing as he approaches them, half-assed insults on Jean’s part and scathing words from Mikasa that have Eren biting back a grin. 

“You’re a boy Jean, I needed a man, and God finally sent him to me.” This is Eren’s cue to make an entrance, and he sure does, barely sparing Jean a glance, instead wrapping a hand around Mikasa’s waist, blocking Jean’s view of her lithe little body. Without an ounce of hesitation, Eren dips his head into a low bow, worshipful as he places a kiss on each breast, wet, sloppy and leaving a sheen of saliva in his wake. Mikasa squeaks at the contact, not expecting the touch, and at her sweet little noise he can’t help but press one more loving kiss to the creamy flesh, his hands skating up over her waist to give her beautiful tits a squeeze. It’s quick, fleeting, just enough to make her smile turn dopey, eyes fogging over with desire, and he’s sure her sweet nipples are hard already, wants nothing more than to kiss her tits all day, but alas he has things to do. He completes his greeting with a kiss to her lips, long and slow with plenty of tongue, a hello that has Mikasa sighing into his mouth, melting in his arms. When he finally pulls back she is utterly dazed, his sweet little church girl the picture of debauchery, lips swollen with his kisses, and her sweater now slightly askew. Eren doesn’t acknowledge Jean at all as he greets her, one last squeeze to her hip as he gets her settled against his desk, “Hi baby.” This is what finally causes Jean to explode. 

“Baby? Mikasa this is the man you’re dating?” Eren glances back at him curiously, lying through his teeth as he asks, “Problem Kirschtein?” As if he didn’t steal the little spitfire right out from under his useless cadet.

Mikasa continues to say nothing, looking up at Eren adoringly and finally Jean snaps, gesturing towards the little pixie in his arms, “Eren, this is my ex-girlfriend.” “The one who dumped you for a better guy?” Jean growls in irritation, “That’s the one.” 

Eren shrugs, pressing his cheek against the soft strands of her hair, inhaling her sweet vanilla scent, “Oops.” Jean looks like he’s about to commit murder in the middle of the precinct but Eren is unconcerned, only tugs Mikasa a little bit closer, “Sorry cadet, it just kind of happened.” 

“How?” Jean grits out and Mikasa answers for him this time, snapping out of her kiss-induced daze, “Jean I told you I wasn’t feeling fulfilled in our relationship, it wasn’t what the lord wanted for me. But Eren–” She turns to look up at him lovingly, “He’s what I need, I just know it.” 

“What exactly is it that you need that I can’t provide, Mikasa?” A firm fucking hand that’s what but Eren refrains from that particular comment, knowing it will start world war three when he would much rather leave in a few hours. 

Mikasa reaches out at that, taking Jean’s hand, looking up at him so seriously, Eren would almost think that God was speaking through her, if he believed in God that is. “Guidance,” She tells Jean firmly, and Eren has to hold back a laugh because yeah, sexual guidance maybe, how the fuck did he end up in bed with this crazy little lunatic?

“What about our pastor, what about our parents–” “Shh,” Mikasa quiets Jean, “My decision has been made, and I made it in the eyes of the lord,” she spares a glance back at Eren that secretive little smile on her face, and he almost groans, because they sure did fucking make that decision in the eyes of the lord, right in front of his fucking salad actually, front and centre, no escape. 

Jean is looking at them both in complete and utter affront, a vein standing out prominently on his forehead, “Adultery is a sin you know.” Mikasa scoffs, “So is pride Jean, now if you would be so kind as to swallow yours I would like to spend the last ten minutes of my fiancée’s break with him.” This proves to be the wrong thing to say because Jean gasps, “There’s no way he’s going to marry you Mikasa, Officer Yeager doesn’t seem like the committed type.” 

Mikasa levels a murderous glare at his cadet and Eren continues to enjoy the show, smoothing a hand over her hip to keep the little heathen from leaping over their desks to claw his eyes out. “We’ve already set a date,” Mikasa tells him primly, before turning her back to his cadet dismissively. She’s pouting now as she looks up at him, her hand clutched in the folds of his uniform just a little too tightly for her to be totally okay. 

Eren presses a light kiss to her forehead before leaning down to her ear, a playful nip to the lobe before he suggests they take a breather, “You wanna hang out in my patrol car for the rest of my break.” She nods, leaning into him a little more, pressing the full weight of her delicate little body against him, “Yeah, I’d like that.” Eren leads her out by the elbow, Jean still fuming behind them, and fuck he knows exactly what he’s going to have to deal with later and it’s not good.

But something occurs to him as they edge out the doors of the precinct, keys jingling in his hand, “Mikasa, baby?” “Yeah?” She turns back, the picture-perfect scene of beauty, her hair falling in silky waves down her back, stunning as ever with that pretty face, and her tits trying to steal all his attention. “Did the Lord tell you to wear panties with that little outfit?” A mischievous smile blooms on her face before she’s sprinting towards his car, her reply caught in the wind of the night, “No!” 

Fucking bratty church girls, now he has to fuck her in his patrol car, it’s just good sense.

[moonshynecybin]

Hi! I have been thinking about Marc and the ways he expresses his anger... giving the cold shoulder... the silent treatment if you will (he will speak ABOUT vale but not TO vale let alone WITH vale)... need your input please....

hmm good question.... this got. STUPID long sorry

uhhh marc is, in general, good at keeping his (negative) emotions in check. like i think marc loooooves to think of himself on track as a mature, controlled, and rational dude. above distraction. a killer. a cyborg. idk his dad has talked about how he doesnt really complain much about injury and there's also allll these stories about what a mature kid he was... so i think that when he was young - ESPECIALLY in a racing sense because he was so much younger than most of the people he was competing against - he internalized that in order to do all the stuff he wants to do racing-wise, he reallyyyy has to keep a level head and not well. act his age! and i think that extends to a lot of how he manages his emotions today (at least in a public setting). even in places where im pretty sure hes PISSED (sepang. phillip island 2013.) he just kind of. visibly contains himself. not a confrontational dude in the outright sense he'll clench his jaw and try to work through it.

which is part of what makes his valentino-oriented crazy so interesting. bc people were noticing that marc in 2015 was kind of. being weird. as his and valentino's relationship deteriorated. like they were both outwardly very much like we can keep it on track :) until the big fallout towards the end of the year but uhhhh. well marc has said that vale started pulling back in september of 2014 like he was noticing SOMETHING, and they clashed on track A LOT in 2015, and i think marc sensed vale cooling on him and freaked a lil. hashtag neurotic 22 year old moments. he is my favorite crazy ex girlfriend. like usually he IS good at separating that stuff out and managing his emotions in the racing sense but in assen that year when vale overtook him off track after they made contact he raised a BIG stink with race direction and actually had some uh. not especially chill quotes about it. (it should be noted marc was also flopping for the first time in his motogp career. like in his brain he stopped winning AND vale stopped talking to him he was goin through it) adn all the reporters noticed too they were like. why werent you sucking and fucking in parc ferme. like vale's left turn wrt to spaniard sabotage comes outta nowhere but people WERE noticing that things were changing. i bet marc noticed too. BUT they are not the type of people to talk about these things so they keep it to vague flirting in presscons and escalating on-track tension slash proxy wars waged in race-direction contexts... liek truly you are 22 you are not going to keep your championship title and your hot sports idol bestie is no longer flirting with you on twitter and you COULD just talk to him about that but you'd rather DIE so youre going to ask honda to back you up to race direction about your last race where you DEFINITELY lost bc winning is the ONLY thing thatll make you feel better. even though thatll help convince your hot sports idol that you are engaging in a benedict arnold level betrayal scheme against him. an insane time to be marc marquez. 2015 really kind of is a study on how both of them handle losing: NOT WELL.

and then the thing about sepang is that then the lid is blown clean off and marc spends the ENTIRE race being annoying on purposeeeee. hes so fucking pissed and hurt at valentino that he decides to get under his skin for REALSIES instead of focusing on his race. like idk he probably would have fought hard for the win without the drama that how he works but uh. i think he was being annoying specifically to bite at vale's edges. and part of that is bc marc is naturally and effortlessly annoying. but i think part of it was SPITE. like his team advised him not to speak on anything from that presscon and he didnt, but he can still fuck him over on track. get under his skin. like he cant tell vale to his FACE that he's angry and confused and hurt. but he CAN let him know on that fucking racing line. where he cant be ignored. idk like i cant see marc letting anyone else get under his skin like that.

AND another big ass exception to the marc marquez anger management philosophy is from misano 2019 where vale messes with his qualifying lap. a lovely anon sent me some videos of marc talking to the press and jesus christ i dont think ive ever seen him angrier oh my god. AND the anon also linked the race from that weekend where he won and he celebrated harder than ive seen him celebrate some TITLE wins like he went. notably nuts. the commentators were all like uhhhh. he mustve REALLY wanted to get one over on vale adjfhlkdh... idk if any of this answered your question but his relationship to his emotions fascinates me hes so weirddddd. and its interesting to me that he can shrug off jorge ruining his last race at honda and be friendly but also be like. kind of aloofly pissed at bezz. because of valentino! he can repress the rest of it, but valentino shines through the cracks.

[sometimes-men-need-help-too]

Woman ‘dehumanised’ partner and wouldn’t let him go to the toilet

A domineering girlfriend subjected her lover to a campaign of belittlement and humiliation over his weight, hair, sex drive and his breath.

Student nurse Sarah Rigby, 41, forced NHS project manager Gareth Jones to eat salad, wear a hat and swallow tooth paste and mouth wash in the wrongful belief he was fat, bald and had bad breath.

During their abusive six month relationship, Rigby – who has six children from other partners – taunted 40-year old Mr Jones over his sexual performance and dismissed him as ‘the money source’.

She was quoted as saying: ‘If I’m not pregnant this month, I am going to find someone else to have sex with and get pregnant. I need to get pregnant this month. If I don’t, I’ll dump you.’

In other instances, Mr Jones, who moved in with Rigby was thrown out of her house in Winsford, Cheshire whilst dressed only in his underwear, was refused his own door key, and would not be allowed alone in the property whenever she went out.

She wouldn’t let Mr Jones use the toilet in her home either – only at the pub or library.

The victim would be ‘frisked’ by Rigby before leaving the house and was condemned to pound the streets or do his job from their local library, pub or supermarket cafe until she came home.

Mr Jones was also forced to forfeit his £4,000 a month wage, allow her to check his phone on demand, and he even resorted to giving his own mother a ‘duress code’ to indicate when it was safe for them to speak without Rigby listening in.

In one row he was hit in face by a glass candle holder leaving him with a scar across his nose.

When Rigby’s children became the subject of family court proceedings involving her ex-partner, she made Mr Jones pay for a £3,000 expert report and file a false witness statement supporting her plea to get custody.

During one tirade, Rigby told him: ‘I may not control social services, but I can control you and I am loving it.’

At Chester Crown Court, Mr Jones told how he was driven to the brink of suicide by the abuse as Rigby, who admitted coercive behaviour, was given 20 months jail suspended for two years and was banned from contacting the victim for five years under the terms of a restraining order.

He said he was now so haunted by his experiences he kept minimal possessions and would have a ‘grab bag’ with him containing a tooth brush, and washing products and a towel at all times.

He also accused Rigby of showing ‘contempt’ for him by turning up to court appearances flaunting a £400 Marc Jacobs shoulder bag he was ordered to buy her.

Mr Jones told the hearing: ‘After the abuse started, the effect of being constantly belittled and abused made me nervous, feel degraded and worthless.. My image of myself became distorted and I had low self esteem – I still feel like this to a degree.

‘When she used to say things like I had halitosis and forced me to drink half a bottle of Listerine or eat toothpaste, I started to believe that I had things wrong with me.

‘I was forced to wear a hat every time we went out together because she didn’t want to be seen with someone who was receding and kept on that she wanted me to have a hair transplant. l also felt degraded as Sarah used to try and intimidate me and ridicule my manhood regularly.

‘I had regular bruising on my body from when Sarah used to kick, bite, scratch or claw me. I was nervous to consult my GP for fear she would find out and beat me further. As Sarah would not allow me to eat – l was called a “fat, smelly slob” – l became paranoid about food.

‘If she kicked me out and I was able to stay with my parents, I would be afraid to eat with them in case she summonsed me back and would be able to smell food on my breath. She regularly kicked me out, making sure I had no belongings with me and as a result I started hiding a toothbrush, shower gel and a small towel in my work briefcase.’

Mr Jones also said his relationships with friends and family became strained as Rigby isolated him from everyone.

He added: ‘After leaving, I became extremely stressed. I was petrified that she would take reprisals and arrange for someone to come to my parents’ house to damage property or even that she would arrange to have me beaten up or worse.

‘I no longer feel open to having a relationship as I’m still afraid that I’ll be abused again. I do not feel l can trust another woman at present. When I am out in public and I see someone with the same hairstyle and colour of Sarah’s, I become scared. I also feel nervous about telling people what has happened to me due to the stigma behind males not being seen as victims of domestic abuse.’

The court heard the couple met in the summer of 2021 through the Plenty of Fish dating website.

Mr Jones contacted the police in early March 2022 when he went to work out of the house. Police later urged Rigby to return the victim’s possessions including his work computer and sentimental items, but she repeatedly denied she had anything to return.

In interview she falsely claimed Jones had been violent, coercive, controlling and manipulative towards her.

In mitigation defence counsel Miss Jade Tufail said Rigby had been diagnosed with PTSD due to an undisclosed ‘trauma’ she suffered in her childhood.

But the judge Mr Recorder Eric Lamb told Rigby: ‘Your conduct has led to a substantial detrimental effect upon Mr Jones, who even today when speaking of the impact of the relationship upon him was plainly close to tears and in great distress when speaking on where the relationship had left him.

‘There were multiple methods of controlling or coercive behaviour intended to humiliate and degrade him.’

[wolvesofinnistrad]

Read on Ao3 Here.

Its been about 6 months. 

6 of the best months of a relationship Buck has ever had. And its not even about it being a guy, discovering his bisexuality. Its just... Tommy.

Hes great in so many ways, and the dynamic is so different that for the first time Buck has been able to relax, not always feel like hes chasing after someone. Actually, hes found out he quite likes being the one that gets chased, romanced, flirted with.

Everything is going great and hes even, in the back of his mind, been starting to think this might be it, this might be a long term thing after all which he'd have never expected. And then Eddie fucks it all up by telling him his most recent girlfriend, Beatrice or something Buck honestly hasn't kept track lately, broke up with him because quote "i can never have a place in your life when you've got Buck so entrenched in it."

Hes never had anyone imply that his and Eddies friendship, the little family hes made with Eddie and Chris, is somehow wrong or off-putting. Eddie was more annoyed than anything and didn't seem to care. But Buck... Buck got worried. Not because he cared about what Betty or whatever thought, but because he wondered if it wasn't true. If maybe their dynamic would scare people off eventually, and did that mean it would scare Tommy off as well?

So that's how hes sitting here, curled under a blanket on the couch, a new sectional he bought because Tommy's back didn't get enough support in the last one, spilling his guts to his boyfriend. When hes done he looks up at Tommy, expecting, well, something. Anger, confusion, heartbreak, but... Its not there. Tommy smiles at him, placing a hand on his leg over the blanket. "Evan... i understand how important Eddie and Chris are to you. I would never make you choose. I would never try to cut them out or deny you that."

Buck takes that in sits with it for a moment but finds it doesn't fully alleviate his concerns.

"But what if... i mean, if were together, you know, for the long haul. It wont affect you? What i have with them?"

Tommy smiles, he looks away for a minute and laughs.

"Can i be really honest with you Evan?" He says, meeting his eyes now. 

Buck nods.

Tommy inches closer, drawing up one of his legs beneath him. "When we first started dating i knew you all were close, but i didn't really understand until later that you were a 'family.'" He pauses, thinks. "But when i did, yeah, there was a moment i was a little worried where i fit in. Where there was space for me in your life. And then i had an idea, and once i wrapped my head around it that way, re-conceptualized how i looked at things, it didn't scare me anymore."

Now that's surprising to hear, Buck wants to know what could have so easily changed his mind. "And what was it that made you not worry then?"

Again Tommy laughs. "I started thinking of Eddie like he was your ex husband."

Bucks eyes bug out a bit. "My what?!"

Tommy shrugs. "It was easier in my head than just saying your best friend who you're co-parenting with. I've dated guys with kids, with exes before. It wasn't a stretch to think of it like Eddie was your ex and Chris was your kid from another relationship. Once i put it in my head like that, i didn't worry about whether we could have a life together. You'll always be tied to them, but it didn't mean you couldn't have a life with me to." He reached over and took Bucks hand, squeezed it tight. "And honestly Evan? I'm starting to think I'd like that. A life with you."

Despite how weird it is to think of his little family with Eddie and Chris that way, how Tommy sees it, there's something relief and happiness coursing through him. Knowing that Tommy's already figured out how he can keep some of the most important people in his life and incorporate them into a new life hes building for himself. For him and Tommy. 

"Evan?" Tommy asks, scootching closer on the couch, their knees knocking together.

Buck realizes its been too long since he's said anything, but when he speaks he simply says "move in with me."

For all of a second Tommy looks shocked, then elated, then seemingly guarded. "Evan... You don't have to lock me down or something i just exp-"

Buck cuts him off, "its not that. Trust me, I've done that before. Held on so tight, clung because i was scared of being left behind. This isn't that. This is..." he stops, lets his mind and body calm enough to get this right. "This is me holding on because I don't want to let go. Because i want to stay, right here, with you. I'm not scared of being left anymore, I'm scared of not putting down roots. Of not letting the best boyfriend I've ever had,"

"Only," Tommy interjects.

"Best," Buck reiterates, gripping his hand tighter, boyfriend I've ever had know that i want this. I want him. I want a life with you too. And hearing that i think, it was just the final thing falling into place, the last weight weighing on me. I... I've been thinking of asking you for a while, but i wanted so bad to get it right this time. And i think i am, but Tommy." He looks into his eyes. "Tommy you're the first time I've felt like if i got it wrong it would still be okay, we could make it work anyway. So move in with me. Please. Or.. heck, we could get a place of our own if you like?"

Tommy kisses him then. Its slow and passionate but all consuming. Its like nothing hes ever had before. And it feels so right. For once it feels Right.

A week later Tommy sends him a photo of a house for rent. Rent to own actually.

"Wheres that at?" He asks, because its a nice place, he can see the potential.

"Its literally a block away from Eddie's house, I saw it as I was driving away." He says, and Buck can almost hear the laugh and smug smile miles away.

"Its perfect." He writes back. But what he means is, 'you're perfect.'

[stanweirdosalliance]

Jason Schwartzman insisted on wearing women’s underwear when filming ‘Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World’

The actor felt it would be appropriate for his character, ‘evil ex’ Gideon Graves to steal his girlfriend Ramona Flowers’ pants and even wore the perfume of Mary Elizabeth Winstead – who plays his on screen lover – every day.

He is quoted by website Movie Retriever.com as saying: “I came up with this idea, mostly out of fear, that my character, Gideon Graves, by the time we meet him, he has Ramona Flowers back. I had this idea that my character flew from New York to Toronto with like just a carry-on bag and he didn't wear any underwear because he rarely wears underwear.

“They spent the night together and the next morning because she's his again and he wants ownership – he thinks in that way – he would have worn her underwear; to own her; to have her underwear on him. And I also wore her perfume every day.

“I asked the costume department to go find me some red silk panties. I came into my dressing room and there were 20 different pairs – silk, mesh, silk-mesh. Every day while I was working and while you watch Gideon Graves, he's wearing Ramona Flowers' panties.

Jason insists he is prepared to do whatever it takes to get into character in his films.

He added: “I've never been formally trained as an actor. For that reason, I don't really have one technique that's the exact same every time. So, I just kind of do the best I can. It's sort of like learning a new city. Every time it's just different.”

[kay-elle-cee]

@jilytoberfest 31 Prompts: Day 1 || 689 Words || Read on Ao3 —

“Excuse me?”

Lily looks up from her phone, startled by the proximity of the deep voice calling for her attention. The volume of the pub around them necessitates close proximity for any sort of conversation, and she blinks as her eyes focus on a (very) attractive man sliding into the seat next to her. Quickly, her eyes dart around looking for Dorcas, who should really be on her way back from the loo any second now, to no avail.

“You’re here with Meadowes, right?” The man asks, a black eyebrow raising knowingly, something unspoken and humorous dancing on his lips.

Rolling her eyes, Lily leans back in her seat and drops her attention to her phone. This happens all the time. “You’re not her type, sorry.”

The man lets out a sharp laugh that draws her gaze up once more, and it lingers to take in the untamable curls that fall in front of square-rimmed glasses. “I’d say not.” At the raise of her brow, he shakes his head with a smile. “I’m James. Marlene’s friend.”

Lily sucks a breath through her teeth and reaches for her half-empty drink. “I see.” Taking a long sip, she sets it down and straightens out the napkin on the table, fixing this man—James—with a tired, knowing look. “And I take it Marlene also disappeared to the toilets about ten minutes ago, and has yet to return?”

“‘Gone to get us drinks,’ actually,” James replies, fingers quoting around his friend’s excuse.

“Wonderful. And here I thought Dorcas wanted to have a girls' night.”

“To be fair to Dorcas, I think she is.”

Lily just stares blankly at him. “Does that usually get a laugh?”

“An exasperated groan, actually.”

“Good,” she nods, taking another sip of her drink. “You don’t need the encouragement.”

James places a hand over his heart in mock-pain, a smile spreading on his lips. “So Dorcas lured you here under the pretense of a girl’s night? Marlene said we were coming to a pub quiz. Imagine my disappointment.”

“This is so messy,” Lily sighs, tracing the top of her glass. “The last time they broke up—”

“I know,” James sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Their schedules just really don’t line up. Maybe that’s why they pulled us into it—someone to hold them accountable.”

“Fat load of good that does when they don’t even tell us the reason we’re here. I have other things I could be doing other than sitting alone in a pub on a Tuesday night.”

“Yeah I’m a little peeved at McKinnon. I actually rearranged my schedule because she said they were down a member.”

Lily’s lips twitch. “You rearranged your schedule for a pub quiz?”

“I rearranged my schedule to help a friend,” he answers, aghast.

“Your friend should be more appreciative and not run off to snog her ex-girlfriend in the toilets,” Lily grimaces, finishing her drink.

He sighs, bringing his beer bottle to his lips (and drawing Lily’s gaze there as well). “It’s not the first time she’s done something like this. I’m afraid I’m rather gullible when it comes to my friends.”

“It’s Dorcas’ first time pulling something like this.” She clears her throat and tears her eyes away from his lips, a flush crawling up her neck as she sees she’s been caught. James quirks an eyebrow.

“Maybe we should teach them a lesson. Make sure they don’t do it again.” 

Her pulse quickens. “Maybe. They shouldn’t leave their poor, suffering friends alone in a bar.” Green eyes flicker down to full lips for the quickest of moments. “Do you have an idea?”

“I do,” James breathes, and he’s leaning in towards her. “But I’d feel pretty shit following through without even knowing your name.”

She honest-to-God blacks out for a second, before remembering the four-lettered thing. “Lily.”

“Lily,” he repeats, and the sound of her name in his mouth sends a jolt of electricity through her. “I’m James.”

Her smile is fleeting as she spots two figures heading their way, and she rushes her next words. “You’ve already said that, and they’re coming. Now shut up and kiss me.”

[patrophthia]

masterlist

last updated: dec, 07, 2023 don't like masterlist ? find my work here !

most of my work, if not all, are written using fem pronouns.

🌷: fluff | 🌾: angst | 🍀: humor | 🪷: smut | 🌟: personal fav

◎ mauraders era

halloween blurb

get up | series masterlist

new jeans 2nd ep ‘get up’ out now and every all streaming platform! which track would like to listen to today?

→ sirius black

sycamore girl | 12.3k 🌷 / 🍀 / 🌟

sirius black has the smartest plan in mind for scamming his family, and it might or might not be faking a marriage.

libraries and abs | 1.7k 🌷 / 🍀

sirius makes sure that his girlfriend does well on her test if that was the last thing he does.

make you mine | 1.7k 🌷

part of my get up series

it's hard having crushes, its even harder when you're someone who's on the shyer side crushing on someone as popular as sirius black; good things lily evans has it in herself to play a little bit of matchmaker!

★ blurbs (fics under 1k words)

just kiss already! | hello kitty clips

→ remus lupin

can i kiss you? | series 🌷 / 🍀

an AUs series of established relationship!reader and remus.

bad habits | 1.6k🌷 / 🌾?

remus bites his tongue, it’s a bad habit.

it wasn’t implied? | 4.2k 🌷 / 🌾

to quote clairo: girlfriend or girl that’s a friend? is what you wanted to ask remus when everything becomes a little too complicated.

★ blurbs (fics under 1k words)

it’d be an honor |

→ james potter

falling for ya | 1.7k 🌷 / 🍀

mutual pining with james

the triwizard tournaments | 7.4k 🌷 / 🌾

what happens when james claims that you’re his girlfriend to save face? well let’s find out!

what letters? | 3.1k 🌷 / 🌾

what happens when your letters to james gets lost on their way over right after you confessed your feelings to him? apparently way too much confusion for the both of you

say the word and i’m down | 4.5k 🌷 / 🌾

part of my get up series

your boyfriend is a dick but your best friend james always has your back so maybe, maybe it was time you ended things with him

→ regulus black

what once was | 2.6k 🌷 / 🌟

academic rivals to lovers but it’s with regulus!

willow | 3.8k 🌷

life was a willow and it bent right through your wind

idiots to lovers | 2k 🌷

an argument leading to confessions in the rain!

dresses and fish bait | 0.59k 🌷 / 🍀

reg being annoying bf/best boy at the same time

cruel summer | 1.1k 🌷 / req

regulus purposely throws a game just so people could know about the two of you.

how you get the girl | 1.7k 🌷/ req

best friend CFO!regulus au!

★ blurbs (fics under 1k words)

better man | what’s wrong with secretary, lupin? | the carpet incident | meowtoos | does it pawther you? | unicorn and squids | a(cceptable)

◎ golden era

→ george weasley

christmas gifts | 1.6k 🌷/ req

your biggest comfort will always be the weasley, whether they force you to join their christmas or not

→ theodore nott | headcanons

love is sour grapes | 5.9k 🌷/ 🌾 / 🌟

theodore is a quiet piece of shit and that leads to miscommunication and complicated feelings

impossible | 2.4k 🌷

fluffy established relationships with theo after reader gets a little (tiny teenie bit) hurt whilst playing quidditch

red ears, and redder string | 7.2k 🌷 / 🌾 / req

red string soulmate!au with theodore!!

fairy of shampoo | 3.9k 🌾 / req

theodore doesn’t know how to talk to reader

take you to the basics | 3.9k 🌷/🍀/ 🌟

theodore is new to this dating thing and his friends + the golden trio are there to help!

try again | 1.1k 🌾 / req

the classic trope of blaise zabini meddling between you and your exes relationship during draco’s engagement dinner

just curious | 2.2 🌾

words of advice: don’t fall in love with your best friend’s other best friend!

attention is what i want! | 4.3k 🌾

it’s no secret that you have a crush on theodore nott, theo knows it, hell the whole school knew it; maybe if they didn’t then it’d be easier for you to get over him after you embarrassed yourself in front of the whole school. at least you got a new friend because of it.

mini skirt | 3.5k 🌷🪷

blaise zabini’s idea of how to play matchmaker might be different from the traditional way of doing it but at least you ended up getting dicked down, so you guess his method works too.

★ blurbs (fics under 1k words)

ASAP | you’re nice | hey emo boy! | too spicy for your heart | you’ve bewitched me | you’re my favorite comic | ditto | thought you loved me | make it make sense | just fine | dirty little liar

◎ riddle era

→ tom riddle

do not make him ‘go away’ | 4.6k 🌷 / 🍀 / 🌟

the head boy tom riddle might or might not just fancy a certain hufflepuff who doesn’t seem fazed by his charms.

show me how | 1.2k 🌾?

tom can’t love, but he’s willing to learn how.

love again | 2k 🌷 / 🍀 / req

tom finds himself attracted to someone who wasn’t phased by his charms

from the glue | 1.1k 🌷/ req

tom never thought he’d find love, but you’re here now and so he loves you.

★ blurbs (fics under 1k words)

know you better | new jeans, do you see? | not funny riddle untitled |

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