#Hero x Villain

[the-modern-typewriter]

Determined heroes and the villains obsessed with them are my absolute weakness, esp when the hero is absolutely at their mercy. You write protagonist/antagonist so well, thank you for sharing!! Once life stuff settles I want to be a patron again!

"You simply don't give up, do you?"

The hero panted for breath, but still couldn't seem to draw enough air into their heaving chest to reply. They doubled over, bracing one hand against the wall. At least, currently, it looked like a wall. They mustered a glare for the villain.

"You're in my domain, sweetness," the villain said, unbothered. "The only exit you have is the one I give you. You could run five marathons and still not find the way out."

"Then give me an exit!"

"When I get bored, of course."

Abruptly, the wall beneath the hero's hand shimmered and shifted, reality bending nauseatingly to something else. Instead of the endless fancy hotel corridors that the hero had started with, they were suddenly stumbling off-balance into a big squashy armchair. Its softness enveloped the hero on every side, whispering reprieve, a relief for their aching muscles.

They were in an old-fashioned library, filled with dark winding bookcases and honeyed light flowing still and golden through enormous windows. A roaring fireplace sprung to life, filling the room with a welcoming crackle.

"Or would you prefer outside?" The villain raised a hand to snap their fingers, in offer. "Are we feeling more brisk, fresh autumn air or sunny beach vibes?"

"I'd prefer you let me go."

"Well, we both know that, but in the absence of me granting that particular wish, you may wish to play along. Unless you'd prefer I get cross about you trying to run? Maybe create something to actually chase you while you're all tuckered out? All labyrinths have their minotaurs, my dear. Would you like to meet mine?"

No. No, absolutely not.

The hero swallowed. They considered their options for a moment, trying to decide if any particular setting would give them an advantage when reality itself seemed so smittenly under the villain's control.

"...outside would be nice," they said. "What's the best view you've got?"

The villain smiled and snapped their fingers.

The armchair stayed, as did the library shelves, but the walls around them fell flat like an unpacked box and crumbled, transforming into a sweeping bio-luminescent ocean. It was unlike anything the hero had ever seen. It barely seemed like something that could be seen on earth! They glanced up to find an expansive swirl of aurora shading a perfectly clear starry night with bright pinks and greens. The stars, themselves, were nonsense. Nothing like the formations of the world the hero knew.

The hero's breath caught, eyes going wide.

A steaming cup-and-saucer of hot cocoa popped into existence by their left elbow. They could smell the chocolate, sweet as it mixed with the salt of the water around them. A dizzying display of casual power.

"Okay, that's good," the hero allowed. "I'll give you that."

"Only the best for my honoured guest."

The villain sat themselves down opposite, though instead of a squashy armchair they had an elaborate but comfortable looking throne.

"How long does it usually take you to get bored?" the hero asked. "Because, you know, I've learned my lesson."

"Oh?"

"It's ridiculous to try and fight you."

"You're fighting me right now, in your way. Trying to convince a god to give you what you want. Trying your luck."

"You're not a god."

"No, gods are a cute mortal inventions. But I thought the comparison might make sense to you."

The hero's stomach squeezed. Another glance at the sky, at the calm waters of an eternally stretching sea, had them gathering more details. Namely that if this entire universe had an orbit, a centre of gravity, it was the hero's unassuming armchair. Or, worse, the hero themselves.

They turned their attention back to the villain, as if everything around them wasn't in some way the villain.

"Okay," the hero said. "Then surely gods, for want of a better word, have better things to do than sitting with me. Isn't this a bit like having hot chocolate with an ant?"

"But a very charming ant."

"We're more charming outside of captivity. Could do dinner."

"See," the villain cooed. "You just don't give up! This is why I knew I simply had to meet you. And I know you wanted to meet me. You've been trying so hard to find me, out in your little world."

"Is that a no to dinner?"

An elaborate banquet table replaced the library shelves.

"That's not real food," the hero said, with as much surety as they could muster. "You know I can't live on air and fairytales, yeah? If you keep me here forever, or until you get bored, I'll starve."

"Which do you think will happen first?"

"Excuse me?"

"Forever. Or me getting bored of you. Which will come first?"

"Forever, probably, is the vibe I'm currently getting."

The villain laughed, so the hero assumed they'd given the correct answer. It was...it was terrifying. More terrifying was the fact that a small part of the hero wanted to be flattered. They'd never had a universe literally revolve around them before.

The hero took a sip of the cocoa, out of some dangerous, dubious curiosity. It tasted like a childhood memory. Safety as the nights drew in. There was no safety from the abyss they were talking to, though, was there? Not really.

"If this is your domain, then this is...you," the hero said. "Which means if I were to find a way to beat you, it would be here. Seems risky to let me so close."

The villain's smile grew, like they knew something that the hero didn't.

"And you're probably not going to let me die," the hero reasoned, "no matter what I do. Even if you set a minotaur on me, or whatever."

The villain shrugged. "Why kill you when I could stretch your entrails like strawberry laces and hang you up in my study like Christmas lights?"

"Wouldn't that kill me?"

"Not here. Not if I don't want it to. It would hurt, though."

"Most people stomp ants. Especially the biting kind."

"Do you want me to kill you?"

"No. I'm just trying to understand what this...is."

"I believe humans call it 'seduction.'"

The hero nearly choked on the cocoa. They carefully set their drink aside, noting the little clink it made despite themselves. Real. Disturbingly real.

"Seduction is trapping me in your domain?" the hero asked.

"Many of the great love stories start with forced proximity."

"Less start with Stockholm Syndrome."

"And less still involve the two of us," the villain said cheerily. "But isn't the novelty exciting? You like what I can do. You said it was good."

"I meant that it was impressive."

"I am. As are you. A perfect fit."

"Are ants impressive?"

"You made the ant comparison, not me."

The hero studied them.

"Drink your cocoa," the villain said, rolling their eyes, oh so indulgent. "I'll let you go eventually. Unharmed."

"When you get bored."

"Before you starve to death. That would be far too mundane an end to our game."

That was...something. Even if it seemed too easy. Even if it seemed like no promise whatsoever that the villain wouldn't end up drawing them into their domain again. In the real world, surely, the hero could win. They could fight cultists. But that still left this. Them.

"Do you promise? That you'll let me go?"

"Promises," the villain mused. "That's almost as cute an invocation as gods. Very well." They leaned in, eyes bright, smile turning to a grin revealing dozens upon dozens of sharp teeth. "I promise."

Surrounded by sea and stars on every side, with no conceivable way to run, the hero could only hope they meant it.

[some-messed-up-writing-for-you]

Short Prompt #1390

Ice and snow bit at Right Hand’s face, forcing them to pull their scarf up higher. The wind continued to howl regardless of their annoyance.

“Boss, I understand you’re immune to the cold,” they grumbled, eyeing the villain. “...But I can’t say the same for the rest of us.”

The henchmen around them wouldn’t dare complain, but it was pretty obvious the temperature was getting to them. Still, they worked hard on excavating the site.

“Bah, you humans… so delicate,” Villain growled softly, but acknowledged the concern with a huff. “Fine, we’re done for the day.”

Somewhere not too far away, a certain sidekick was hiding in the snow. They were totally going to ambush the enemy, impress Hero, and DEFINITELY not get caught in five seconds!

[autocrats-in-love]

Prompt (463)

The villain check their makeup in their pocket mirror one last time.

“Why are you getting so dressed up to fight the hero?” the villain’s sidekick asked.

“Uh-” the villain stuttered. “I just want to look professional.”

“You’re wearing glittery eyeshadow.”

“Shut up!”

[sunnynwanda]

suductive AFAB villan x AMAB hero where they end up tied up and when trying to tease the hero the hero breaks free and decides to have their way with the villan

Fair Warning

Warnings: suggestive/ slightly spicy, knife play, mutual pining - yep, they're hot for each other

Hero coughs, spitting on the ground to get rid of the all-too-familiar sickening sweet taste of the chloroform. He runs the tip of his tongue over his busted lip, cursing under his breath as he slowly becomes aware of his body. His hands are chained up over his head, eyes blindfolded.

He swears again, practically growling as the recognition of his enemy's signature moves sinks in.

Villain is going to pay for this. Dearly.

He barely manages to finish the thought when something cold and rather sharp grazes the skin of his collarbone, causing a unpleasant shiver across his shoulders. Next comes a quiet snickering laugh, and Hero almost smiles sneers at the sound.

"You little-" he grumbles, but Villain cuts him off, musing into his ear.

"Uh-uh," the dagger presses into Hero's skin, drawing blood and a sharp inhale through his nose. Villain grins and, upon realising that he cannot, in fact, see her cocky smirk, pulls the blindfold off. "Hello there."

Hero cannot help himself as he rolls his eyes at her theatrics, watching as Villain purses her full delicious lips, feigning offense. "You're not gonna greet me? How rude."

Her dagger trails a tantalizing path along his jawline, earning a groan from the back of his throat and another reaction from farther down his body. One he is increasingly more aware of.

"Stop it," he warns, eyes dark as he takes in their surroundings, calculating an escape route in less than four minutes. Two minutes to free his hands, one to wipe that smug smirk off her pretty face and another to make it out of the window.

"Stop what?" Villain inquires, tilting his chin up with the blade, her lips dangerously close to Hero's skin when she leans in, speaking in a seductive whisper. "Am I making you uncomfortable?"

"Not the word I'd choose," Hero roughs out, his voice hoarse. He bites the inside of his cheek as he tries not to focus on the scent of her hair that floods his nostrils or the growing discomfort in his pants. Maybe kevlar was not the best choice for a costume.

Villain hums, leaning back as her hand drags down his chest, mapping out his muscles through his shirt as she goes. "Mmm, what word would you use then?"

His eyes zero in on her lips until they curve into a smirk, the sight downright sinful. Hero coughs, trying to ignore the images flashing through his mind. Not the time, Hero. Not the time.

"What are you-" His question is cut short when Villain turns the dagger, slicing his shirt open for her eager eyes.

Hero inhales when his smouldering skin comes into contact with the cool air of her lair. Villain ignores his reaction, allowing her free hand to glide over his skin, relishing in the shiver that runs down his spine.

"Are you gonna be a good boy and do me a favour?" She asks, flattening her palm over his stomach before meeting his gaze, too distracted to notice the subtle movement of his fingers against the chain.

"You know the answer is no," Hero mutters, looking at her with heavy-lidded eyes. He has half a mind to agree and see where exactly she's going to take this but decides against it. For now.

"You haven't even heard it yet," Villain reasons, her bottom lip forming a pout that he's desperate to bite into. She steps forward, standing much closer than safety protocols allow.

"Doesn't matter," Hero shakes his head for good measure, his entire demeanour demonstrating conviction.

"Oh, but it does," Villain argues, her tone playful as her fingers trace the outlines of his abs in their descent down his body.

"No..." Hero warns, unsure if he's responding to her words or actions. Both would be an outright lie, but none of it matters when he finally manages to unhook his chain and avoid her noticing.

"But-" Villain makes one more attempt, but Hero interrupts her with a fair warning.

"Shut it," he snaps, jerking forward in a mock attack. "Before I make you regret drugging me and bringing me here, where no one can help you."

That statement earns a disbelieving chuckle from Villain. "Oh? You think you can?" She teases, narrowing her eyes as she watches his chest rise and fall in ragged breaths.

"Try me," Hero offers her a wolfish grin, tilting his head to the side, the challenge clear in his tone.

Villain licks her lips with an amused grin, leaning closer to him - exactly where he wants her.

"Asshole," she taunts, the tip of her nose brushing his.

"Brat," Hero growls, jerking forward again and smashing his lips to Villain's. Before she can process what's happening, he rips the chains down and apart, and, in mere seconds, it's her arms that are up in the air, wrists chained together in one swift motion.

"Fuck..!" Villain groans, earning a deep chuckle from her nemesis.

"That's exactly what I'm gonna do to you," Hero assures her, shrugging his ruined shirt off his shoulders before stepping closer. His hands move to her hips, shifting her to the wall behind her. She meets his gaze, defiant yet clearly flushed. "Got something to say?"

"Yes," Villain nods, gasping when he hoists her up, pinning her against the wall with his body as his hands wrap her legs around his waist.

"What would that be?" Hero murmurs, plucking the dagger out of her fingers and holding her gaze as he uses it to cut her costume open down the front.

Villain glares at him for the payback, attempting an indignant look, but her hiss turns into a stiffled moan when Hero's head dips into the crook of her neck. She bites her lip, exhaling loudly when his hips buck against hers. "This was the favour."

"For me to have my way with you, baby?" Hero chuckles at her admission, his mouth attaching to her burning skin as his hands grip her thighs greedily. "I know."

A/N: Gosh, I've been waiting to write for so long, you don't even know... Thank you so much for reading (all of you) and for the request (whoever you are, I like your mind xD)! It had me typing wildly at 1 am. I hope I understood the requested genders correctly, but if it's wrong, please let me know.

Masterlist

Taglist: @marvellousdaisy@alltimelowing@lateuplight@surplus-of-sarcasm@betwist @excusemeasibangmyheadonawall @enemies-to-idiots-to-lovers @miaowmelodie @thatonerandomauthor @hhabaddon @burningoutlikeicarus @daemonvatis @weepingcowboywolfbat @thelazywitchphotographer @kaiwewi @soul-of-a-local-bard @pigeonwhumps @aflyingsheepnamedrose @thatneptune @ohwellthatslifesstuff @worldsfromhoney

@thiefofthecrowns @crow-with-a-typewriter @qualityrabbitsoup @stargeode @villain-life @villainsblood

@whumpifi @glassthedumbass @silviathebard @misskowe @ayeshaturnedtoashes4444 @m4iloblu3

[noobtiedoo]

Hero: Why do I feel like you haven't put that much effort into your plans today?

Villain: I don't know what you're talking about.

Hero: Come on. Usually, we're well matched, but I beat you so easily today.

Villain: ... It's dumb luck. That's all.

Hero: Uhuh, and this would have nothing to do with the fact I've only recently recovered?

Villain: Ha! Of course not. Why would I go easy on you just for that?

Hero: Your ears are turning red.

Villain: Shut up.

[the-bar-sinister]

Obsessed with villainous displays of affection.

violence on their beloved's behalf.

deranged compliments and praising bad deeds.

stealing nice things for their beloved.

jealousy and possessiveness.

encouraging their beloved to be worse.

crimes together.

[bebx]

love the classic damsel in distress trope, but the damsel in question is a pathetic fictional man bleeding out in the dark somewhere on the floor before his ridiculously gorgeous knight comes for his rescue just when he’s about to pass out, and the ridiculously gorgeous knight in question is actually a deranged villain who is his archenemy. but they both have these frustratingly unresolved sexual tension going on where they both hate each other but are also super possessive and protective of each other in the sense that no one else can hurt this little guy but me!!!! and so the knight carries his pathetic damsel in his arms bridal style back to his goth castle where they have hot, kinky gay sex ever after (after he nurses his pathetic enemy’s ass back to health, of course, can’t risk bruising our fragile damsel when he’s already half dead).

[villainousauthor]

Hero stares down at the paper in front of them with mounting dread. Their stomach is all tied in knots, and they feel a cold sweat at the back of their neck.

"You know, you don't have to do this if you truly don't want, I'm not forcing you." Villain purrs behind Hero, voice against their ear. The threat is unspoken. If Hero doesn't sign, they'll continue with their rampage. Continue killing, destroying, maiming.

The pen shakes in Hero's hand as they continue staring down at the paper. It's just a piece of paper, made of thick cardstock, cream white. Yet Hero has been staring at it for fifteen minutes, as if it'll bite them.

Certificate of Marriage

The font is too pretty, all stately and official looking. Hero feels as if they may throw up any minute.

"I don't understand why.." Hero finally finds their voice, asking the question that's been bouncing around in their mind since Villain first pulled the paper out as they suggested a truce.

"You already know my terms. In exchange for leaving your hero friends unharmed, for leaving the civilians of the city unharmed, I want you." Villain's voice is something possessive, filled with fire and heat. "This just makes it more official. More binding."

Hero shudders, and they feel as Villain steps closer behind them, a dark shadow looming over them. They know this goes beyond simply wanting to make their agreement more binding and they both know it.

"You know it's not legitimate- it's not legally binding without an officator." Hero stumbles over their words, not even sure if that's true.

Villain snorts, not usually one to be worried about legality of course. They put a hand to Hero's shoulder, warm and rough.

"I can find a priest to threaten. No one needs to know how and when we signed. Unless you'd rather make a big ceremony of this." Villain's tone is now teasing, amused by the idea of a wedding. "That could certainly be done if you prefer."

Flushing hot, Hero shakes their head quickly. No, they would not prefer that. This is already nerve-wracking and humiliating as is. A part of them wants to outright refuse, to tear the paper the shreds, and throw it in their face, but Hero knows this is the chance to get Villain to back down.

"I wouldn't be unkind to you." Villain says, voice suddenly softer and more serious. They lean forward, face resting against Hero's neck. The most terrible part is that Hero knows they mean it. They wouldn't be unkind or cruel, and that makes this all the more difficult. "You'd belong to me, but I'd take care of you."

Hero already knows there's no choice. They knew from the beginning that there was no other option. They have to do what is best for everyone else. Shakily, they finally nod.

"So selfless, so sacrificial to others." Villain says as they place a feather light kiss against the shell of their ear. "We'll have to work on that once you're with me."

They take Hero's hand currently holding the pen in their own, their grasp strong, as they lift it to the paper.

[save-the-villainous-cat]

“I’ll admit,” the villain whispered, their hand slowly sliding along the hero’s leg - from their knee to their thigh to be precise - “I’m a bit rusty.”

“You?” the hero asked.

“We haven’t seen each other in six months,” the villain said. “That’s enough time to rust.”

“I thought you would have gotten your fun elsewhere.”

“Well, I didn’t.” Softly, the villain pressed a kiss to the hero’s throat and the hero (stupidly so) forgot their responsibilities very quickly again.

The hero didn’t consider themselves particularly greedy in bed. They took what partners threw at them and usually, that was enough. With the villain, it felt different. They felt more confident, they felt terribly secure. The hero wasn’t a passive party anymore.

“Six months are enough to move on,” the hero whispered.

Their stomach dropped when they realised that the villain was giving them a hickey. Instinctively, the hero grabbed their enemy’s clothes but only got a hold of one of the bullet proof vest’s straps. Though the hero tried to pull them closer, the villain didn’t move until they were done on the hero’s throat.

With a wet sound, they parted.

“You’ll understand how desperate I am right now, then.”

“Is it smart to continue this?” the hero asked. Six months. Six. Often, their thoughts would circle around the villain. As if they were an addict.

“…do you want to continue this?”

“Well, yes…”

“Then what’s the problem?” Again, they leaned in and this time, they left a trail of kisses on the hero’s neck.

Within milliseconds, shivers ran down the hero’s spine and their brain fried. Their heart was loud enough for both to hear.

“I don’t know…maybe something changed, maybe you changed.” The villain looked at them, their usually focused and serious eyes suddenly soft.

“Love, what are you talking about?”

“Maybe there is someone else you…” The hero took in a deep breath. Six months were a long, long time and if the villain had found someone else during that time…someone who was simply more fitting, the hero didn’t want to stand between them. The villain was charismatic, chatty, nice when they had to be. Surely there had been someone who had shown interest while the villain was in hiding.

“You’re aware I am extremely picky when it comes to my partner.”

“Yes, I know. But—”

“And stupidly loyal.”

The hero didn’t know what to say to that. They knew what loyalty meant to the villain. It wasn’t a term they used carelessly.

“Don’t worry,” the villain murmured. They pressed an innocent kiss to the hero’s lips and continued with another one that was a little more daring.

The hero had almost forgotten what it felt like to be kissed. What it felt like to have the villain’s tongue in their mouth.

Even as the villain pulled away, the hero couldn’t form a single coherent thought.

“You’re my nemesis,” the villain reminded them. Two of their fingers traced an invisible path down the hero’s chest. “You’re irreplaceable.”

The villain was methodical. They were gentle. Their hand stopped on the hero’s lower stomach.

“And now, be a darling and spread your legs. I’ve been craving the sounds you make for half a year.”

[anime-villian-irl]

"id let the world burn for you"

"I'd kill for you"

"id die for you"

"I'd sacrifice the world for you"

BORING!

Yawn snore snore. Honk shoo honk shoo.

I got twelve other guys ready to that for me. You already do that. You already destroy the world I would just happen to be there while you did.

The real question is.

Would you save the world for me?

Would you put aside your hatred for humanity and put my love for it Infront? Would you save the world because I love the world? Would you stop killing because I hate killing? Would you find a way to live because I want you alive?

Death and destruction are easy as hell. Do you know how fucking easy it is to kill someone? To blow up a building? Shure security is in the way but if it wasn't there it would be easy as hell.

You'd do the basics Shure. But would you do the hard thing and save the world because I asked you to?

Would you push aside your hatred of everyone but me because I asked you to nicely?

Would you?

[the-modern-typewriter]

Imagine a villain straight refusing to fight another member of the Hero Team just cuz his hero archnemesis is not present

"Where are they?"

"Oh, not again." The protagonist could feel a headache coming on. "Look-"

"-Are they hurt?" The villain's eyes went dark and dangerous. "Who hurt them?"

"They're fine! Oh my god."

"Then where are they?"

The protagonist definitely had a headache. "It's their day off."

"They didn't tell me they had the day off. What's wrong?"

The really concerning part was that the hero probably would tell the villain which days they were working and which they weren't. The two of them were as bad as each other! The hero was going to be unbearable when they came back and found out that the team had fought the villain without them.

"Can we just get this over with?" the protagonist tried.

"No."

The protagonist sighed. They pinched the bridge of their nose and took a few deep breaths. "Okay," they said slowly. "But you realise I'm still going to have confiscate your nightmare robot."

"It's not for you. And don't think I didn't notice you dodging the question!"

The protagonist considered their options; lies, truth, everything in between.

The villain's nightmare robot hunkered down a little more pointedly in the middle of the bridge. Several people honked their horns. It was, honestly, embarrassing for everyone involved at that point.

"Their grandma died."

"Oh no." The villain's whole face softened. "Grandma L or Grandma P?"

Of course he knew the hero's grandparents. Of course he did. "Look, about the robot-"

"-I'll reschedule," the villain said.

"I can't let you keep the robot. My boss would have my head."

"That sounds like a 'you' problem. I have flowers to send."

The protagonist's eye twitched. "If you try and walk away with it-"

"-Do you really want to traumatize this entire bridge of innocent civilians?"

"I'm sure they're traumatized having to listen to you two idiots on a weekly basis."

"I'm taking the robot. When are they back?"

"They haven't said," the protagonist said, through gritted teeth. "As you know-"

"-They'll be doing all the funeral arrangements. Yeah. You know what, give me their number. I'll text them."

"I'm not giving you their number."

"Why not?"

"It's against policy."

"I'd like to express my condolences."

The protagonist looked them dead in the face. "Mm. That sounds like a 'you' problem. I have a robot to confiscate."

The robot slammed a fist into the bridge. It wobbled precariously.

The protagonist raised an eyebrow, unimpressed. They folded their arms across their chest.

"You're a real piece of work, you know that?" the villain snarled.

"I hate you too, don't worry."

"I should kill you."

"They'd have so much paperwork when they got back from the funeral. It would really improve their month, you killing me."

They ended up glaring at each other.

"If I give you the bloody stupid robot, will you give me their number?"

The protagonist smiled sweetly. "That's the only smart thing I've ever heard you say."

Everyone, generally, preferred it when the hero was around.

They all made sure it didn't happen again.

[the-cypress-grove]

Insults (Fantasy Edition)

They're as useful as a wet blanket in the middle of winter

I could talk to my horse and have a better conversation

She did love her family, but she'd rather have an ocean between her and them.

He was the kind of man to stumble across rational thought quite by accident and dismiss it as absurd

'Quite frankly, I'd rather eat Hemlock.'

I know the gods do not exist, because if they did, they would've struck you down by now.

Well, you're clearly got some troll ancestry.

That's probably the wisest thing you've ever said and yet still you are wrong.

Do you just sit there all day and hope some sort of sentient through floats in your direction

She was tolerable. From a distance.

They were often wrong but never in doubt.

[autocrats-in-love]

Prompt (462)

The villain smiled. “Aw, did you just call me a nickname?”

“I called you a pain in my ass,” the hero snapped.

“Still counts!”

[thepenultimateword]

Prompt #269

Hero:

Your profile says you like stargazing. Would you wanna fly around some time? I can get us an extra good view 😉

Villain:

This is Villain.

Hero:

Dang it!! Stop being on every powered people dating app I use!

Villain:

I think the real question is how you keep matching with me on every dating app you use.

Hero:

I’m not doing it on purpose!!! I’m just not used to seeing you in civilian clothes and keep getting confused!!

And you have to match with me too you know! So I could say the same about you!! Why are you swiping up when you know it’s me?!

Villain:

Honestly? Because it’s hilarious 😆🫰

Hero:

I’m blocking you. AGAIN.

Villain:

Awww, but that stargazing date sounded fun.

[wiingdings]

cat people