#Henry would have fuckin died

[whencartoonsruletheworld]

never have I played any nights at Freddy fazbears

pls explain the whole plot and all lore to me as if I were small and slightly stupid

oh great timing i literally JUST explained this to my asoue discord

this is a VERY simple summary, but things to keep in mind while reading:

very very VERY little of this is directly spelled out for us. the creator, scott cawthon, LOVES to confuse people on purpose and the vast majority of the lore is gleaned from hidden minigames, secret cutscenes, and easter eggs. this makes things very confusing and controversial within the fanbase, so im gonna try to explain where there are differing opinions

really, there's two main stories: the first main story was completed with FNAF6 and Ultimate Custom Night, the story going on rn is the second and it is still ongoing. as such, a lot of the lore is still a mystery to all of us.

For clarity's sake, I will divide this between: THE AFTON STORY, the one the movie's gonna tell a part of, and THE GLITCH STORY, which the games are going through

dont worry i will make it fun to go through so it doesnt feel like school

ok lets go

THE AFTON STORY

First, let's get a visual chart in here. don't worry it's just for show

These are the important families we will be talking about; the Emily family, with father Henry and daughter Charlie, and the Afton Family, with father William, two sons (Michael and a boy who is still unnamed, he might get named on friday? We call him Crying Child "CC") and a daughter, Elizabeth. Don't worry about the mothers they're not important

Okay so here's the thing: of these four children, all but Michael die VERY early on in the timeline

The problem is we do NOT know THE ORDER each of them died. There's a lot of arguments on all sides but I personally think the order is sad boi->charlie->baby so imma present it in that order. But keep in mind that we don't actually know because of the confusing way the lore is dropped.

okay so for starters.

Backstory/FNAF4

purple guy is william afton and he and this guy vcalled henry start opening a restaurant chain starring freddy fazbear

in the original location they've got two animatronic suits, fredbear and spring bonnie. the other location has freddy, bonnie, foxy, chica

the og location suits are ~special~ tho, bc henry and william are crazy inventor dudes. these suits are called "springlock suits". they function as full animatronics but you can wind all the wires and gears and endoskeleton and shit back and step into the costume yourself. only problem is the safety is jackshit and if you like. cry or sweat or breathe wrong the springlocks will fail and the metal will come crashing back and crush u to death. u should have enough time to get to the back room so u dont bleed out in front of the customers tho. springlock suits are important remember those

michael is in his early teens and has just learned how to be a shit to his siblings and is trying out this hot new bullying thing. he's picking a lot on CC because CC is terrified of the freddy animatronics. it is said that he "saw something" that scared him, it could be anything as benign as "saw someone go into the suit and got freaked out" to something as serious as "saw one of those aforementioned springlock failures and person bleeding out." could also be charlie or elizabeth's death if those happen earlier in the timeline. again we dont know bc cawthon likes to confuse us

CC is not scared of the freddy characters tho, he has all the plushies and calls them his friends. he's just scared of the animtronics. unfortunately his dad works there so he has to be there like 90% of the time so he's having a wonderful time. hence the moniker "crying child". bc he cries all the time

anyway at his birthday party, michael decides it would be really funny to shove CC up into the animatronic's mouth for kicks. this goes about as well as you'd expect cause the mouth closes and fuckin. crushes his head

kid goes into a coma for a while but eventually flatlines. while he's in the coma we hear michael tearfully apologizing, and his fredbear plush talks to him (presumed to be william) saying he will "put him back together"

anyway that was fun. so next up charlie emily gets FUCKING MURDERED

Backstory/FNAF1-2

for some reason charlie gets locked outside the pizzeria. william's driving by and decides to stab her bc why not

honestly most of us believe that this occured after CC just bc it gives william motivation to be pissy at his business partner and kill his kid abt it, but also a book that released a month ago implies that william might have been nightmare gassing his kids for shits and giggles so. who knows. dont worry about that btw its not relevant rn

anyway the thing is willie and henry had an animatronic designed to protect the children called the puppet. the puppet sees charlie outside and goes out to help her but it's raining so it fries up the puppet's circuits and it crashes on top of her dead body. cheery!

except this is where it gets wild bc charlie proceeds to like. possess the puppet

possession is really complicated in this universe but basically there's no real way to communicate openly with people and the possesser might not even be aware of who or where they are or anything really but. yeah the lil girl def possesses the puppet

its after this that william starts killing kids for funsies. a lot of us presume that he saw the puppet getting possessed and was like "holy shit a way to bring crying kid back" but again he might've just decided this was fun

anyway he lures five kids into the Secret Freddy's Backroom That Is Not On The Maps by wearing the spring bonnie costume. after killing them he shoves them into the other animatronic suits (freddy, bonnie, chica, foxy, fredbear "golden freddy") and yeah they start gettin possessed

the fifth missing kid was stuffed in fredbear and here's where it gets veeery theoretical cause we dont have straight confirmation of this but just some theories. it's VERY likely that crying child was also haunting fredbear at this point, and shoving another kid in there got two kids haunting the same bitch and it causes fredbear (golden freddy) to be really fucking weird and glitchy and eldritch or w/e. anyway you dont have to worry about that rn cause golden freddy doesnt show up much they're too busy ascending or smth

now this is where the lore gets confusing-- the first game claims that after the last two were lured, someone was caught on camera, arrested and charged. however we know for a fact willie-boi wasnt caught so either 1) this got retconned when cawthon decided to actually make lore, 2) he wasnt convicted and somehow still kept a hold on the fazbear empire during this, or 3) a lot of us theorize that henry was framed for the crimes and thats why he disappears from the timeline until the sixth game. cause yeah he disappears from the timeline until the sixth game. personally i believe the third it makes a lot of sense but yeah willie-boi stops killing at about five kids

anyway will is going full scientist with all these animatronics and he's like. ripping parts off them and putting them on other animatronics to see what happens. we THINK. again this is really vague but this is just kinda the most logical explanation here.

anyway this is what happens in fnaf2 and what it does is like. split the souls and shit. and he's like "oh this is sick" except this makes all the suits act erratic as hell and very angry towards adults (theyre cool with kids tho) and eventually one of them causes the infamous Bite of 87. we're not entirely sure what it was but one of the animatronics bit off the frontal lobe of someone in 1987. this caused this location to get shut down and willie boi just puts the pieces back on the og animatronics and is like "well shit what do we do now boys"

FNAF5: Sister Location

anyway so this is where we think elizabeth dies in the timeline. william makes these things called the "funtime animatronics"-- we know they are made after a fnaf location shuts down, though it's not specified which. these animatronics are built SPECIFICALLY to kidnap children. ballora is built as a distraction for parents, the other two are built to only move when not seen, and then Circus Baby™ has an arm that can grab kids and drag thtem into her until willie lets em out. she is programmed to only do this when a child is alone in the room so william tells elizabeth "do not go see baby when you are alone in the room"

so elizabeth is like 6 and she goes to see baby when she is alone in the room and baby grabs her but the arm is fucked up and the kid dies p badly

funtime's location is then immediately closed due to "gas leaks" and william rents out the funtimes for parties. at the same time he starts shoving some haunted parts into the funtime animatronics to see what happens. we THINK.

important location here btw is the "scooping room." it's actually very good horror but basically it's a bitch that is supposed to rip the endoskeletons out of the suit whenever theyre malfunctioning. super smart idea that will cause no nightmares going forwards.

anyway the animatronics all kinda know that william killed them so after a while (a few years??? who knows) they start trying to kill him and he's like "hmm. i cannot go into this bunker anymore. let me send michael, my last surviving kid who i hate." this is where michael, now an adult, re-enters the timeline.

mikey boy is told by his dad that he can bring his baby sis back to life if he goes down into this bunker and does some shit. michael is like "oh sweet" bc honestly he probably still feels guilty about literally killing his bro and so he goes down to the bunker.

the animatronics eventually tell him "go into the scooping room it'll be totes mcgotes" and when he gets there he finds out that the animatronics have killed all the other employees, scooped themselves, and fused their endoskeletons into one conglomerate called ennard

ennard is like "yeah we cant escape here cause they just bring us back so we're gonna use you as a skinsuit k thnx" and they scoop him and use him as a skinsuit

it's really good horror i promise

BUT this turned out to be a bad plan because Humans Decay so after like a week ennard gets puked up by the MikeSuit and escapes into the sewers.

here, meanwhile, is where mike pulls a reverse uno card and possesses his own decaying corpse

LIKE A FUCKING BADASS

he then calls up his dad and is like "hey dad :) elizabeth's fine now :) BUT :) they fucking killed me :) because they thought i was you :) you sure sent me down here to die huh :) anyway :) im gonna come find you :) you have a ten minute head start start running :)"

actor really fucking sold that monologue too ngl

so he's like. PISSSSSSED and rightfully so he is walking around in his own corpse. so he goes to find his dad

Backstory/FNAF3

this is about when peepaw willie goes back to the original fnaf location (we THINK) and is like "ok im just gonna take apart all the animatronics and do something with these"

only when he destroys the suits the missing kids' ghosts show up and spook him. so this guy who's been studying ghosts is like "oh fuckshit there's ghosts here" and tries to hide in the spring bonnie suit. only he laughs and this causes the springlocks to malfunction and FUCKING VIOLENTLY KILL HIM. get springlocked idiot

except then HE possesses the spring bonnie suit and this is springtrap. but also he's in a super secret back room while this happens so he is trapped there for a while

FNAF6

so ennard, michael and william are fuckin around for a couple years. at some point ennard decides that elizabeth is kinda a freak actually and kicks her out of the hivemind so she just rebuilds herself a circus baby suit and keeps wanderin around so now we got four bitches doing who knows what

eventually it's been 30 years since the last freddy's closed and someone opens up a haunted house parody of it. mike goes to work there as a security guard* and guess what they found springtrap and bring him to the attraction thinking he's just an animatronic. after five nights of fucking with him mike sets the place on fire to try and finally kill his dad fr. it does not work

*note that this isnt confirmed to be michael but we kinda. all know it's probably him. it really seems to be him

anyway then michael finds out that an actual fazbear's is opening and needs an owner so he goes and becomes owner of the restaraunt. while some guy on a cassette tape is giving him tutorial instructions he sets up the place and also collects several animatronics. these are:

scraptrap (peepaw post-fire and really pissed)

scrapbaby (elizabeth now thinking that maybe if she kills things her dad will pay attention to her)

molten freddy (remains of ennard still not entirely sure what's going on)

lefty (a bear solely built to capture the puppet, who was still fuckin around the fnaf2 location i guess. anyway now the puppet is here thats important)

so after our five nights scrapbaby comes on the speaker system and is like "omg dad if we kill people will you love me. we're gonna kill soooo many people it's my passion actually" and that's when the cassette tutorial guy interrupts her

and he just goes "yeah. you're not doing that"

anyway he's like "hi guys. you remember me??? henry??? from 30 years ago?? i owned half this business? you killed my daughter and stuffed her soul in a puppet? lmao yeah i literally lured you all here and you came like the fucking idiots you are. im setting the place on fire, we're all gonna die and go to heaven. except for YOU, WILL. you are not going there. lmao bye" and he sets the place on fire and they all burn. it's more epic when he says it tbh

now henry mentions that he had an escape route ready for the building owner but he figured out the owner was michael and was like "i feel like you wanna stay and burn with us" and michael's like "fuck yeah"

you might think that wraps up the story nicely but OH NO THERE'S MORE

Ultimate Custom Night

see, the next game is ultimate custom night where you can choose which animatronics hunt you and their level of difficulty. it is through hidden messages and shit that we find out that ucn is, canonically, william being tortured in hell. which is sick af

anyway the tormentor is a spirit labelled "the vengeful spirit" in the files, and "the one you should not have killed" by the animatronics. we sometimes hear either a light voice behind the other animatronic lines (could be either a woman with a light voice, a little girl, or a little boy), and the pic that sometimes shows up as a hallucination is a distorted photo of scott cawthon's son. we know for a FACT this spirit is someone from the fnaf6 fire cause they reference the fire more than once while poking willie with a stick. it's probably not elizabeth cause she was just tryin to get her dad's attention. it's not charlie/puppet bc one of her lines is like "ffs just stay out of my way for ONCE." we also know for a fact it's not henry cause they were like "henry sure tried to release us huh. not happening im not letting you go that easily bitch haha" so that narrows it down to michael and the missing kids

now here's the thing.

the vaaaaast majority of the fandom is convinced that the vengeful spirit is cassidy, the missing child that was stuffed inside golden freddy with cc. this is because golden freddy is in a looot of ultimate custom night and if you beat the hardest mode you just get a quick cutscene of him glitching and then everything fades to black

however. i have seen legiterally no convincing evidence that this is the case. all we know about cassidy is she is the golden freddy missing kid and was talking to cc through the logbook. and we BARELY know this. in the alternate universe book she first showed up in (the silver eyes) she wasn't even the golden freddy kid. people point out a similar situation to her and cc in fazbear frights where one of the kids was tormenting william (stitchwraith) but that's literally a whole separate universe and completely separate characters with separate backstories and personalities

there's a sprite in security breach who fights glitchtrap (explained below) who was named in the files as "cassidy" so ppl point to that but 1) they changed that name after people made a deal out of it, 2) that could mean literally anything, 3) the protag of the next game was named "cassie" and her story kinda paralleled the sprite's first game so uuhhhh anyway

honestly i think it's WAY more likely the vengeful spirit is mr michael "i'm going to come find you and set you on fire twice" afton, using his childhood likeness to fuck with his dad. this is strengthened by one of the easter egg cutscenes in ucn, where the vengeful spirit talks to a benevolent spirit who tells them to "leave the demon to his demons. there is nothing for you here." the audio in the background is someone distortedly screaming "HENRY" and "MICHAEL"

one of the animatronic lines also says "is this a prison for you or for me? perhaps both" implying that the vengeful spirit feels like they belong in hell, which would fit with mike's "i killed my brother" self-loathing. the golden freddy glitch could very easily be his mental anguish as well as william's, with the optional cutscene telling us that while michael is self-harming by torturing his dad in hell, he has the ability to move on and find peace if he can forgive himself. honestly i really like that open ending there

another point towards "vengeful mike" theory is that we play as him for most of the games (definitely 5 and 6, most likely 1 and 3, some theorize 4) and so him being the vengeful spirit is way more emotionally impactful than "random kid #5"

however every time i bring this up to the fnaf fandom they get really really pissy at me because y'all love ur angry lil girl cassidy headcanons and honestly that is completely fair i also love angry lil girls. im just saying this bc we're going over whats canon rn and i firmly believe in vengeful mike (thank @birdsareblooming for that) but yknow. cassidy is also fun as hell

i wrote a whole essay on this btw these are just the cliffnotes. do you guys wanna see the essay

anyway that's where the afton story ends but OHHH NO MR CAWTHON CANNOT STOP

if you just want a quick catchup before the movie you can stop here but anyway. let's talk mimicry

THE GLITCH STORY

the games coming out recently are kinda a sequel-story and bc theyre still coming out we are still very confused about what the fuck is canon and what is not so this one will be a lot more guessing. i digress let's talk about

Help Wanted

so back on earth, it's the 2020s-2030s. turns out the fazbear company is still functional and they're like "well shit guys what the FUCK do we do about all of That"

so they decide they need a brand cleansing and what they do is they secretly hire an "indie game developer" to make the fnaf games in-universe, to make light of the tragedies and make people take them less seriously. they pretend to have beef with this indie dev but eventually put all of his games into a VR game as a show of "good faith." somehow this actually does work in revitalizing the brand image

also sidenote but the books imply that the indie dev was kidnapped and gaslit into making the games but thats not important

now see there's a glitch in the game and the beta-tester jeremy mentions it and then gets increasingly withdrawn and obsessive. because it turns out there is a Bitch in here

now. the identity of the Bitch is uh. controversial in the fandom rn. i will say for clarity that i am in Party Two and will probably be biased towards that but here's the thing. the Bitch is either:

a digital upload of william afton's soul (somehow escaping hell)

THE MIMIC

Help Wanted Interlude: The Mimic

see, the other books (silver eyes, fazbear frights) are set in a parallel universe-ish to the books, similar rules and worldbuilding but cawthon can fuck around all he wants with no consequences. there were charliebots and springtrap mpreg at one point it was nuts. but the thing is right now they're kinda trying to tell us that the current series, tales from the pizzaplex, is game-canon. god only knows if they'll stick to that so some people think the books are in the game's universe, others think they're parallels to the games and not 1-1 exact much like the others

but anyway they give us crucial lore on The Mimic so here we go

some guy named edwin (some think he's a parallel to henry or william, but rn we're just gonna assume he's canon) is a single dad to a toddler. however he's working for fazbear making all these animatronics and he's sooo busy and needs something to distract the toddler so he creates a fucked up nightmare animatronic called The Mimic, whose programming is extremely basic: "copy whatever you see being done"

the toddler actually loves the fucked up nightmare animatronic and teaches him to play patty-cake and carry around stuffed animals or w/e. anyway then the toddler runs out into the street and gets hit by a car

edwin is still grieving and the mimic comes up carrying the toddler's stuffed animal and still copying him and when the mimic that edwin programmed to copy things is still copying things edwin snaps and just beats the fuck out of it bc he needs a grief outlet. he then abandons the thing but however the mimic has just learned Violence

some employees come by to see where edwin's animatronics are and the mimic just starts killing all of them bc. well. it's supposed to copy things. it will copy things

there's a BIG GAP here in what happens to it next but it disappears for the next 30 years. however it is heavily, HEAVILY implied that it witnessed at least one of the missing children incidents

fazbear actually has a Lot of mimic endoskeletons but bc they start copying violent shit they shut them all down. however they all run on the same program, "mimic1" and fazbear keeps that tech around cause you know it could be helpful

Back to Help Wanted

now here is where the "we only THINK this is canon we dont knkow yet" comes in

back to the vr game, they are just shoving random old pieces of code in there to speefd up the process of making the game cause capitalism doesnt like long development times. this puts the mimic1 program into the program and it immediately sees All Of Afton's Crimes In 4K. it decides "oh yeah i can mimic this but i should probably get a physical body in order to do that"

so beta tester jeremy sees the mimic program, which takes the form of Spring Bonnie Suit. this is Glitchtrap

now keep in mind that some people do still believe that all this aint happenin and the spring bonnie glitch is just william. again i personally believe the mimic cause it makes more sense than "william escaped hell somehow" but w/e

anyway, glitchtrap is fuckin around. it tries to possess beta tester jeremy and in order to stop it, jeremy does the sensible thing and cuts his own face off

so glitchtrap is like "hmm. that didn't work out" and decides to go for the more subtle approach. the next beta tester, currently unnamed, starts recording tapes inside the game to send to the next beta tester so they dont fuck with glitchtrap. glitchtrap however seals itself inside the tapes so that when the beta testers try to delete it, it'll instead be inside the tapes and cant be removed lmao. it then "mimics" tape girl's voice and adds a last tape saying "let him possess you its ok i promise"

it also mimics her intro of "hello can you hear me" in the one time it speaks so. mimic

anyway the next beta tester is this gal named vanessa and she gets possessed like suuuper quickly and glitchtrap is like "oh fucking FINALLY"

Security Breach Therapy Tapes

vanessa's acting weird at work so company requires her to go to therapy, however she has the same therapist as Another Patient. this patient will be named later however right now we're calling them Patient 46. they do not talk but have the same therapist as Vanessa and is creepy about it. anyway whenever a therapist prods too much into either Vanessa or P46's life, or discovers them fucking with fazbear tech, the therapist mysteriously goes missing and shows up later dead and mangled by machinery

they go through like five of these bitches at least, but it's clear P46 is another bitch possessed by glitchtrap but they're like more possessed than vanessa is so glitchtrap likes them better

BUT THAT'S ALL BORING, WE'VE GOT A PIZZAPLEX NOW!!!

Security Breach

fazbear opens a giant 80s-style mall with a ton of attractions like disneyland or w/e and call it the Mega Pizzaplex. There's state-of-the-art animatronics in here that are basically sentient ai. they might be possessed but we're not actually sure rn they might just be advanced robots

they start with "glamrock" freddy, bonnie and chica, along with roxy wolf instead of foxy. we're not sure why rn. anyway at some point something suspicious happens and bonnie is found mangled and he's replaced with montgomery gator, a c-list animatronic they had to run the golf course. he doesnt seem to take the spotlight well and has started breaking things but its probably fine

anyway they eventually realize they can automate the staff and stop paying human beings and they jump on that cause they love cutting costs. they've got staffbots everywhere except for ONE person- vanessa, who is hired as the security guard. we find a note saying that her interviewer found her too inexperienced for the position, but someone "very" high up in the company pushed her into the role. this is implied to be glitchtrap taking over the systems

so vanessa and P46 are shoving glitchtrap into the systems because, well, guess what? the pizzaplex is built on top of the fnaf6 location. the one where henry set them all on fire, and they're trying to do some sort of shit with the burnt remains of springtrap. if you believe in william!glitchtrap he's trying to get his body back; if you believe in mimic!glitchtrap he's trying to fuse himself to afton's corpse in order to gain a corporeal form. it also helps that there is The OG Mimic Endoskeleton in this area (its explained in the books im not going into it) but it's pretty fuckin damaged so they gotta spend some time fixing it before fusing it with peepaw's corpse

but the night they're supposed to do that, something goes wrong: a child is loose in the pizzaplex

glamrock freddy had a malfunction onstage, and when he wakes up in his room, there is a child hiding in his stomach compartment (used for oversized piñatas and cakes). this child is named gregory and he looks suspiciously like the crying child and we dont have an explanation for that but no, matpat, he's not a robot, it's probably just symbolism

anyway gregory actually has like very little memory of what's going on and barely remembers his own name but he says that vanessa the security guard is trying to fuckin kill him so he needs to get tf out of the pizzaplex. freddy's like "well you're shit out of luck cause the doors close and seal until 6am but that's fine we can make it til then" and gregory's like "fucking JOY"

long story short gregory has to run around the pizzaplex while every animatronic but freddy is trying to kill him. freddy is not trying to kill him bc his malfunction caused him to enter Safe Mode and it turns out that Safe Mode is safe from the glitchtrap virus. everyone else, however, gets glitchtrapped and is trying to kill this kid

you dont find out why until like laaaate in the game and even THEN you're confused until one of the goosebumps-knockoff short stories confirms a thing, and that thing is:

gregory is patient 46

oh shit

turns out gregory was possessed by glitchtrap for FUCK knows how long and was used as its body for like the entire time. and when he eventually wakes up un-possessed (no idea how that happened) he has no memory of whats going on at ALL and is understandably fucking terrified. doesnt remember being possessed or killing ppl or anything he just wakes up and runs. glam freddy likely malfunctioned cause glitchtrap was like "oh my god go GET that stupid kid" and glam freddy was like "but???? protecc????" and entered safe mode

so gregory eventually fuckin DEMOLISHES all the other animatronics and uses their parts to upgrade freddy. freddy is like "hey where'd you get these parts" and gregory's like "uhhhhhhhhh dont worry about it" "hey where are my friends" "DONT WORRY ABOUT IT"

while this is happening, a possessed vanessa is in a bunny suit calling herself vanny and also trying to kill him. this is just as confusing to us as it is to you

anyway there are six endings to security breach. according to the most recent game, there is a chance that two of them are canon. WE DO NOT KNOW which of the two is canon. these are the endings:

Princess Quest Ending: greg and freddy try to confront vanny and she gets freddy ripped apart by staffbots. gregory then finds an arcade game in her room and plays and beats it which sets her soul free (presumably he knew how to do this cause he's remembering bits and pieces of being possessed??? idk). anyway once the game is beat she is unpossessed and takes gregory and freddy's decapitated head out of the pizzaplex

Burntrap Ending: gregory and freddy avoid vanny and go to the fnaf6 basement where freddy starts acting all fucked up and then thtey find the Springtrap corpse, now Burntrap (fused with the mimic? glitchtrap? yknow). it tries to kill them so you have to Boss Fight everything and then set him on fire again. THEN a tangled mess of animatronic wires with a funtime freddy head (remains of ennard???) shows up and drags him off. again, just as confusing for us as it is for you. freddy and gregory escape. no idea where vanessa is

ONE of these is canon. we do not know which. this is making the fanbase super chill and normal /lying

Evidence for Princess Quest: in ruin, we see a headless glamrock freddy in the exact same area he is in pq. we also have no sign of vanny trying to help glitchtrap. you can collect gregory's fanart of his own game and pq is the only one he didn't draw. princess quest arcade game has sword sticking out of it

Evidence against Princess Quest: aforementioned headless freddy is labelled a prototype on his foot and we know for a fact that our freddy does not have that stamp. he also has a gift inside his stomach when freddy gave his stomach gift to gregory already (and it was a diff color). the pq arcade game has sword sticking out of it BUT that could symbolize the princess being skewered, and surrounding the game is art of the escaped glitchbunny

Evidence for Burntrap: labelled as "true ending" in the files, only ending to be FULLY animated instead of switching to comic form and also only one with boss fight, the tangled animatronic mess is definitely canon (we see it, gregory draws it so he saw it too which means he went in the basement where it was), while vanny isn't seen her grafitti is everywhere and appears to be recent

Evidence against Burntrap: the "true ending" label, like cassidy, could mean literally fucking anything. also if vanessa is still under his control why the fuck doesnt she help him where is she

so yeah we're having fun figuring THAT out

Ruin (the end so far thank god)

the most recent game we got, then, was the dlc for the above game, this dlc is called ruin. a few months after this, a lil girl named cassie wanders into the ruins of the pizzaplex cause her best friend gregory told her to meet him there. when she gets there she finds a walkie-talkie and he's like "girl im trapped under the pizzaplex you need to shut down the security and come get me" and she's like "sounds great"

she finds vanny's mask and puts it on and enters an AR world where a glitched bunny is trying to kill her (this one isnt glitchtrap actually) and a friendly little AR bear is telling her to keep going she's doing a great job (this one IS glitchtrap probably)

anyway it turns out her backstory is her dad worked for the pizzaplex and she had a birthday party there with her Favorite Character Roxy and literally none of her friends showed up. she was sad about it until gregory showed up and became her friend. then gregory went missing and she was sad

anyway the last security node is favorite character Roxy and roxy recognizes her and is nice to her and its very sad

cassie eventually goes down to the fnaf6 basement and is like "ok gregory i opened the door are you okay" and PSYCH, IT'S NOT GREGORY

IT'S

THE

MIMIC

the mimic immediately tries to kill her bc it likes violence but roxy shows up to save her. the real gregory calls her on the walkie-talkie and is like "bITCH GET OUT OF THERE" and she's like "IM TRYING" and gregory's "friend" (whose pronouns are very specifically blurred out, so it could be either freddy or vanessa) uses the building maps to help her to an elevator. however when she gets in the elevator gregory's like "yeahhhhh sorry we cant let you be followed :(" and drops the elevator, trapping her there

it's like a 99% chance this last bit was not gregory but it was the mimic, seeing as gregory is not even in the pizzaplex and the mimic lost cassie right next to the elevator fuse box that it could easily rip out. so you know

anyway we end with either roxy finding cassie or the mimic using roxy's voice finding her so this kid's fucked lmao

also other questions about if mimic is burntrap is that we see the mimic p naked in this game and not in a fun corpse skinsuit so where did bunny go??? however i will also mention that there is a secret ending that shows us that the FUCKING SCOOPER is here so. personally i think that answers that question. get scooped idiot

oh also if you noticed "hey 'cassie' sounds a lot like 'cassidy,' the golden freddy kid who was sharing a body with the crying child, who has a similar design to gregory," congrats! we've noticed that too! we have no fucking idea what it means! :D

and thaaaaat's five nights at freddy's

that didnt take too long did it

[lakesouperior]

🐻🐤🐰🦊 just some thoughts on the fnaf movie

🐻the attention to detail that was put into it, with all it’s little details and easter eggs. the posters in the background, (and i haven’t seen anyone bring this up), the guy who got face-mauled by the cupcake wearing a midnight motorist t-shirt. the spring lock scene. the fact that scariest of all the jumpscares (of which there weren’t a lot but it’s kind of for the younger demographic ig they can’t make it too bad) was freaking balloon boy. the highest kill count going to MVP Carl the Cupcake. this is what i mean when i say movies from established franchises should be made by fans, for fans.

AND THE MATPAT CAMEO. HIS ACTING ISNT EVEN BAD AND EVEN IF IT WAS I EOULD STILL LOEV ITTT DVDNFB

🐤 you can tell they put a lot of thought into the child actors. abby is phenomenal. the five missing children? properly creepy and sad looking.

🐰 characters were all really well written and entertaining. the karen aunt, for all that she is an antagonist and very much hateable, still manages to be funny. even background characters are hilarious, like Doug for example, and don’t even get me started on the friggin matpat cameo i nearly screamed in the movie theater.

🦊 vanessa and mike are naturally each other’s narrative foils (and stand-ins for respectively Michael Afton/Elizabeth Afton (MichaElizabeth if you will) and Charlotte Emily imo), and them saying the same line, the “that’s two jobs”, mike at the beginning, and vanessa at the end, TO THE SAME CHARACTER?? TO THE BIG FUCKIN BAD HIMSELF??? WHO THEY BOTH HAVE DEEP HISTORY WITH???? literally this is good writing. i’m not saying the movie is perfect because it isn’t, but this is good writing.

🐻 and vanessa, as much as she kind of is, doesn’t feel like a coward because her worst fear does come true. her own father, the person who she thought the world of, tries to kill her as soon as she steps out of line. her fear wasn’t unjustified. she spent her entire life under his control — has literally never known anything else, and to still rebel after so long must’ve been the hardest, most terrifying thing in the world but she still did it because she’d grown to care for mike and abby.

and this is what i mean when i quote that one post: “strong female characters ≠ characters who are female and punch good, but strong female characters = well-written female characters” like yeah, vanessa’s an antagonist, or an anti-hero i suppose, but she’s still, once again, likeable and mysterious and funny. and the “bring her here again and i’ll fucking shoot you”?? that was probably her first act of true rebellion, aside from telling mike more than she should’ve about the pizzeria.

🐤 mikes arc is a very obvious “let go of the past and learn to cherish the present” which isn’t exactly revolutionary, but i think it’s done quite well though it could be improved a bit. and as much as you think he is an absolute cabbage head for telling them they could have abby for even a second, but you still, once again, get it.

our man’s running on like two hours of sleep and also meds, finally getting to see his baby brother up-close and even touch his face for the first time in probably more than a decade of blaming himself, and then getting told he could go back and see his parents again, the grief over who he probably hasn’t been able to process since he had to take care of abby when they died (possibly even took his own life in the father’s case if he’s supposed to be a henry stand-in like i think and doesn’t that just make it fifty times worse)

and it’s set up that he wants that perfect family back, the kind that he had during his childhood, that abby never got to experience.

and maybe he feels guilty for that. maybe he thinks, in his sleep-deprived and grief-ridden mind, for only a moment, that she would be better off, since she seems to like the animatronics and their ghost children better than him and he still feels like he doesn’t know how to raise a kid.

🐰 speaking of abby, for once Child Character in the horror movie isn’t just there to do some stupid shit for Plot Reasons (cough, The Curse of La Llorona, cough cough). i mean yes, she does go with them at the climax, but she has been given no reason not to trust them and considering the fact that they are other children, it would honestly be more suspicious if she didn’t trust them (also we’ve been shown she doesn’t really have friends before the end, so they’re also her first and only friends, no wonder she’s clinging to them) plus she’s been left alone with the aunt she does not like, possibly still believing mike is abandoning her. you get it.

she’s also very entertaining in her sassiness. like “are you here to arrest my brother?” or “yeah, love you too bro, kinda don’t wanna die tho, can we leave?” literally i can’t stand kids in general, but especially so in in horror movies, but i would give my life for abby.

🦊and the drawing thing? it’s beautiful and sad and really hammers home the fact that these monsters, however scary they have been made by their brutal and cruel deaths, they were, and are, just children who didn’t deserve to die and communicate the same way children like abby do. it also makes abby herself relevant to the plot and actually useful.

🐻and about abby; i have my own Theory there. we know she wasn’t in the picture during Garrett’s disappearance, which means she’s at least twelve years younger than mike. it’s actually quite common for couples who are going through a rough patch to have kids to try to fix it, which i think is what happened here, made even more possible if they also had her as a sort of replacement for Garrett. this, as i said earlier, makes mike’s indecision all the more understandable — if abby doesn’t just look a lot like Garrett, but was actually supposed to be him and would’ve never existed if not for the tragedy.

but that’s Just A Theory. 🐻🐤🐰🦊

[newsiesrewritten]

Newsies Rewritten Footcanons

It’s not headcanons if it’s canon to my media rewrite.

Also taking suggestions for a better name LOL

One of the other family leaders in Brooklyn, Dorothy, also known as Dotty (aka the Uksies Spot) is the same age as Spot despite being Spot’s apprentice for a while. The two consider each other their younger sibling, and Dotty is constantly talking about overthrowing Spot.. as every sibling does.

Otto Wiesel is estranged from his father, he only briefly sees the Delanceys and he pretend like he doesn’t know him. He is also a full grown adult and tries to stay as far away from the newspaper industry as a whole. He used to be Wiesel’s muscle before the Delanceys show up.

Kid Blink was the first to scab because he had taken on the responsibility of Tommy Boy and he had led the first strike before the one Jack led, only for that one to fall through. He respects Jack for trying but didn’t believe it would work. (He also admittedly was saving up to get Tommy Boy some form of actual education and couldn’t afford to starve another day.)

He also knew his own David, David Simmons, who scabbed after becoming a popular interviewee of the strike Ann, Kid, and Simmons held themself. The two are close still, and Kid Blink often disappears with him for the night if the bunkhouse gets too crowded.

Racetrack will not stop talking about the damn horses. Rally speech? About the horses. Daily conversation with Albert? How ‘bout them horses? Albert is SICK of it.

Medda and Spot are closer than Medda and Jack are. Medda taught Spot to built his confidence and “grow into his shadow.” As he says. He brought a pair of pale baby pink suspenders that he wears for special occasion in memory of what she’d done for him.

Pulitzer spent so much time and energy on Katherine because she was not only the spitting image of his wife, but she also had her heart stop at the age of 2 due to pneumonia. Her survival deemed her the miracle baby of the six surviving children.

Katherine is the third born child of Pulitzer, though raised as the eldest daughter after her sister Lucille died when Katherine was 15. (Katherine would’ve realistically have been 17 years old during the strike of 1899.)

She doesn’t really interact with her siblings as she’s busy pursuing her reporting career but gets to know them after seeing how the newsies act around each other.

The first thing Jack buys after the strike is a brighter blue shirt. (To symbolize his commitment to the Manhattanites ofc.)

York is at the rally and when he finds out Crutchie had been taken away, he tries to beat on Jack for not protecting his cousin. (Even though they are estranged.)

Jack’s a bitch. I don’t know if you know this but Jack is somewhat unlikeable in Davey’s eyes for a GOOD fuckin’ portion of the rewrite.

Davey Irish goodbyes the newsies A LOT, he just slowly backs away and if no one notices it, he just leaves. He just doesn’t really know how to say goodbye.

Sarah and Katherine meet during Once and For All and have been good friends ever since.

Jacobi and Henry have a friendly rivalry, since Henry’s family runs a deli. Though Jacobi never admits he has a soft spot for the boy, he can sometimes be spotted teaching Henry how to perfect some of the recipes and showing Henry some of his personal record keeping books that he uses to keep track of deli costs.

[skyblueartt]

Can you describe your William and Henry personalities?

OHH sure thing!! It’s like having OCs with less steps LMAOO because we honestly know so little about their personalities before all of the horrors happened! I just make things up lmaooo- kinda just taking my favorite things I’ve seen from the fanbase as well as me just makin up some stuff because why not. I’m still relatively new to this fanbase so ah whatever, fuck it we ball!! Here’s my own personal interpretations of the guys

I’m also at work rn shhhh haha

William- I feel like he is VERY very charming. Eerily charming, even. Smooth talker, can say things that make him appear very personable and likeable. Is it all an act? Probably. Especially after he takes up his new “hobby” after his son dies. I feel like the man is a natural born performer. I imagine that he has a flair for the dramatics and probably has a great stage presence. I mean, he is a performer at the restaurant after all! I also like the idea that William is very egotistical, but deeply insecure. Idk, just think that’s interesting! Also- this guy is VERY eccentric and just an all around like weirdo, like I’m sure he’s very known around town. That whacky British guy who co-owns that chuck-e-cheese place popular with kiddos who is also really fuckin intelligent cuz he makes robots. Like. What a fuckin guy. Even though he’s a bit of a weirdo, since he’s so damn charming, nobody would ever think it possible for him to become this notorious fuckin killer. Terrifying! I also like to think that William has a bit of a strange sense of humor. This is self indulgent because I love dark humor and funny villains 😭

Henry- ah MAN I feel so bad for this guy. I wish we knew more about who he was before the murders! From Fnaf 6, I gather that he’s remorseful, feels guilty, sad, exhausted, and just fucking done. But who was he before everything? Idk! Personally, I LOVE to make him a nice guy who just got every damn thing in his life taken away from him, because that’s just really sad to me LMAO. :( I think Henry could look intimidating sometimes, right, like he’s a bigger guy with a beard and whatever- but he’s actually a really kindhearted guy. To me :’) though he could absolutely beat somebody up and win everytime. For sure. somebody once described him as “the personification of a bear” with how he looks and that’s so fuckin cute. I feel like he’s also got a sense of humor, and I adore imagining that he’s the only Mfer out there to encourage William’s weird ass jokes. He balances Will out, I imagine! Like yin and Yang. Not as sociable as William, I’m sure he’d rather just chill by himself with his robots (bro fuckin loves building robots). But with his loved ones, he’s super kind and funny and just a cool guy- just like, a cool dad or uncle figure. Probably would hug me so tight that I couldn’t breathe, and tbh I love that. Although AFTER Charlie’s death….oh BOY. I headcanon that he has a lot of bad coping mechanisms (alcohol), definitely shut off from the rest of the world, the “color from his life” is gone. Depressed in every sense of the word. I could yap more but I think ya get the jist!! (In my head, it’s fun to imagine Henry and post scoop Mike reconnecting because damn their lives were both ruined by the same guy. Traumatized found family!)

Not my OCs but damn do I treat them like they are😭 they are very fun characters to write and draw!

[toxifoxx]

🐻🛠️?

🐻🛠️ (Henry Emily) ⬆⬆⬆

shidddd have i really never done a headcanons post on henry?!?! time to correct that. putting this under a readmore again cause it got long

born and raised in utah i think. maybe in a different town from hurricane but he does live in utah. in a semi-rural area

has siblings!! jen is his older sister. still a little fuzzy on if he'd have more siblings or not - i think he would, but they're not important enough for me to give much thought to (SORRY)

he's sort of the weird kid. on account of his autism actually! he grows up pretty isolated unfortunately, most kids at school avoid him or find him strange. and if they're not offput by his resting bitch-face they end up getting offput by his interests.

in his family, though, he's seen as very smart and talented. perhaps even the star child! i think they dont really understand him all that much. the concept of autism is puzzling to them. but they're supportive of his interests in engineering/robotics and encourage him to pursue that.

family isnt mormon, but they are catholic! henry isn't exactly a bible-thumper or even super into it or anything but the catholic upbringing definitely influences how he thinks. this especially applies to his relationship with william, feeling constant guilt like it's something wrong and they shouldn't be together.

on the contrary henry's family probably wouldn't even mind. jen definitely wouldnt. i think his dad is shitty and homophobic and his mom also internalized some of those ideas but both of them would've come around to it eventually…RIP

college is the first time he isn't a complete outcast - he's still not exactly social, or even well-liked, but certain people are drawn to his autistic swag (namely william, clara, and maria. definitely a couple others, probably mostly people in the same major as him)

him and william have a bit of a tense relationship when they first meet. they get on eachother's nerves & also william is being a fuckin prickkkk. but he mellows out a little (A LITTLE.), they get to know eachother, and find common ground with their shared interest in engineering. (even though william is majoring in business)

despite having MULTIPLE flings with william he ends up marrying maria, mostly as a desire for normalcy, but he does also love her, she's incredibly kind and understanding and almost everything he could ever want. unfortunately she dies shortly after giving birth to their first child, charlie.

henry loves charlie very much since she's his only kid. but as much as he loves her he's like, similarly a workaholic as william, and so he can be quite neglectful and isnt always watching her. this is why the puppet exists

mentioned it before but he stops believing in god after charlie's death. his faith is like completely shattered by that.

smoker, occasional drinker. both habits get worse after charlie dies.

oh also i think henry is kinda apathetic towards gender. he wouldn't fall under the trans umbrella he just Doesnt really care how he's perceived. and he doesn't make a huge effort to appear masculine he just kind of falls into that category by default.

a slight accent to his voice. like he used to have one but it dissipated. i was gonna say he sounds slightly, vaguely southernish but that doesn't make sense

bro loves the outdoors!! hiking, camping, fishing… all things william hates because 1. hates getting dirty 2. burns to a crisp in the sun. even so, henry can convince him to come a couple times. maybe the whole family. god that sounds like a nightmare actually

also also mentioned before but him and william are so close they might as well be raising their kids together. family but not officially. ya know.

though they did have elizabeth together. there is still that. so. maybe they should be raising them together

henry learned to sew from his mother, maybe the basics of cooking too. had to actually fully learn to cook after the death of his wife.

i feel it'd be quite fitting if he worked as a mechanic for a while. like maybe during college.

oh!! and he does woodcarving. he used to make little wooden carvings of bunnies for william. nowadays he usually does them as gifts for the kids (if they have something particular they like: e.g. a fox for michael, a bear for evan)

haven't settled on it yet but i do like the idea of henry being the fnaf 3 guard. its fun.

fnaf 3 to fnaf 6 henry is basically a tired old man who's ready to shuffle off this mortal coil but sticks around mostly for the purposes of putting an end to the shit he and william started. getting that final closure. perhaps for justice, but that's a smaller part of the picture. henry is a little bit selfish, after all

maybe took remnant after discovering an excess that william had hidden away. he was born in 1940 he'd be 83 in 2023. which is quite fucking old. i think he'd need it a little bit

i tried to go over ones i mostly haven't said before, so there's a few things left out (and why some important story beats are missing). feel free to ask again if you want to hear more, this is getting long enough already LDSLGKDSJGLS

[loganlermanstanaccount]

What you deserve

pairing: Joel Miller x reader

(AO3 mirror)

summary: you confessed. Joel shut down. now he's trying to pick up the pieces.

warnings: angsty asf guys (whoops) , hurt/comfort with a twist! (mostly hurt, minimal comfort)

a/n: part 2 is up! read here.

wc: 800

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He walks into the room so quietly you jump at his voice.

"Ellie said you'd be here."

You don't turn around; fingers fumbling around the med bag you were rearranging. Had been rearranging. It was hard to do much with Joel's voice rattling around in your head.

Jackson was hard. The journey, even harder. Tess, Henry, little Sam. A list of names crossed out in a black ledger. In the heat of the moment, almost you. So finding this little safe haven just west of Wyoming was a miracle and a half. But somehow, you wished you were back out there. Like Joel, you'd take a clicker head on, just to avoid this conversation.

He rubs his wrists demurely and pads behind you. Close, heavy. Hands glancing at your waist.

"Don't." It comes out shakier than you meant it. Unsure. "Please, don't."

He pauses, steps away. "Just wanted a look at ya. That's all." No response. And then he says, "If I didn't know any better, I'd think you're avoidin' me."

You manage a dry chuckle and your shoulders heave, "...good thing you don't know any better."

"I mean it. Are ya…. are you ok? I wasn't thinking, sweetheart, I promise-"

Now, you turn around and look at him, and his voice dies in his throat. Joel Miller, square-jawed, handsome, even in the moonlight streaming into the clinic. Even pallid and pale from the stab wound at the base of his stomach. His brows are knitted together, worried. About you? It was fucking ironic, considering things.

"I just need time, Joel. I'll be okay, but I need time. And some space. And for you not to call me sweetheart, and look at me like-" -like that. Like you hung the moon and stars out in Jackson tonight. "Coworkers. Like you told Tommy. I'm fine, promise."

"Jesus." He steps closer, so this time you can feel his breath on your cheek. He takes your palms and kneads them in each hand. God, this isn't fair. He knows what he does to you, and yet here he is; cradling your hands and looking into your soul. He hasn't said a word and yet you can't move. You should, but you can't.

"M'sorry… listen- listen to me. Please, and then I'll fuck off wherever you wan' me to. Just need you to hear it."

You can't even look him in the eye.

"I thought I was gonna die, twice maybe, on the way back here. The first time, I was stupid. Raiders, fucking idiots, stompin' around the place. 10 years ago, I woulda seen them in time, gotten Ellie away. Wouldn't have gotten stabbed; not a chance. It was my fault. The second time," He pauses, hooks his thumb under your chin. He wants to see you when he says,

"The second time, I told Ellie to leave and get straight back to you. Thought that was it, thought I was a fuckin' goner and then, 10 minutes later, she comes back with a rusty needle and thread from God knows where - and tries to patch me up. All I could think, was that if I survived this, you would kill me. I could hear your voice, clear as day; 'Joel, you so much as get an infection from these shitty stitches I'll finish you off myself', 'Joel, I told you to practice first aid with Ellie every now and then, or you're both gonna regret it,' " He's smiling now. It's sweet and he's so pretty in the gentle light.

" 'Joel, you come back in one piece' "

"Except you left," you say, staring right back at him. "Before I could tell you to come back safe, Joel. Before I could say goodbye."

"I know. And m'sorry, doll. I meant what I said….before. It hurt to say it, but I did. I can't give you what you deserve."

A small sob, and you shake your head. "No, we're not… we're not doing this again-"

"Just hear me out, okay? We don't just work together and it was dumb of me to say so. I'm sorry. Maybe I should've said something when Tess told me. H-how you felt. I'm sorry." and now, a little quieter, "You deserve more than what I can give you. What we do, smuggling shit in the QZ, it's not- it's not a life. That's what you need. A warm bed every night. Dinner parties. Those disgusting fuckin' noodle packets ya like to hoard. All you can eat, sweetheart. Friends. A family, maybe. Someone who can protect you. A life. Please don't cry… you know I don't like to see you cry,"

He wipes the tears from your cheek. "That's why I said what I did. Not to spite you. But because you know I'm an emotionally stunted ass who's only gonna hurt you."

***

part 2

[delinquentbookworm]

thoughts about Henry and Mercedes, after episode 47

thinking about Henry and Mercedes leaving their home, their entire plane of existence, to go and do their best to care for the people that their sons sacrificed and left for dead. the absolute hell they must have gone through to establish a point of safety and peace in all that chaos and violence. it's a terrifying world of cannibalism and memory stealing and various factions struggling for power, but even so, they wouldn't hide Oakvale. if they did then the people looking for help wouldn't be able to find them. so they're exposed and vulnerable and every time a group of attackers comes along looking to hurt them or exploit them, the first thing Henry and Mercedes do is try to make peace. try to offer them shelter, ask them if they really want to be enacting all this violence. and sometimes that works! and sometimes it doesn't.

Henry stewarding Oakvale and being terrified of turning into Barry. being terrified that he might be slipping without realizing it, he could be falling under the Doodler's influence. is he encouraging the villagers to idolize him? is this a cult? he fuckin hopes not, but would he even be aware of it if he was? he's seen the way people act in this world, so convinced that what they're doing is totally normal, even as they tear someone limb from limb, even as they're pushing other people into vats of molten cheese.

Mercedes leaving her life behind and taking up arms, learning how to kill to defend her people. she gets good at it. really good at it. they both wonder if this is the doodler too, if she's being changed, if she's starting to enjoy it. Henry assuring her that this isn't her responsibility, she doesn't have to do this. Mercedes getting fuckin pissed off whenever he suggests that she isn't just as responsible, as if Lark and Sparrow aren't her sons as well, as if she doesn't have just as big a role in everything that happened.

occasionally, they get phone calls from back home, and it's never anything good. Ron calls them to let them know that Darryl died. then a call from Terry Jr, Ron disappeared and they think he drowned. Henry agonizes about whether or not he can justify going to their funerals. Henry normally doesn't leave Oakvale, doesn't like leaving it undefended, doesn't trust Barry on his own, even with the bracelets (they had to move the bracelets from his ear to his hand after they caught him trying to cut his ear lobe off to get rid of them). but just one day back home would be minutes in this world. surely that's okay. surely he can make that exception to go say goodbye to his friends.

both times, he's terrified that he's going to come back to ruin and devastation. both times he feels incredibly guilty to be able to leave, to be able to take a day off, when billions of others can't. both times he gives flowers grown on the world that Darryl and Ron were born on, before code purple swapped everything round. both times, Glenn offers him a joint, asks to at least get a drink together before he runs back to the old world. both times, Henry declines and disappears before he can get too comfortable, before he can be tempted by the safety and the calm, before he can be convinced to stay

in the present day, Lark and Sparrow didn't seem surprised that Mercedes had passed away. they already knew. so Henry must have called to tell them at the time. were Lark and Sparrow expecting it, did they see it coming? how long had it been for them, since they'd last seen her? how long had it been for Mercedes, how long had she gone without seeing her beautiful boys, before she died?

thinking about Henry without his wife, without his friends, without his sons, caring for a village full of traumatized and terrified people, the only family he has left is his abusive father, living in a world that is constantly trying to destroy everything he's built, and the fuckin emotional fortitude it must take to still, after all that, offer the Doodler a cup of chamomile tea.

[dee-in-the-box]

so. thought a little too hard about my headcanons for Dsaf 3. and now i'm a bit sad. so now y'all get some!

Jack listening to Henry's tapes and getting about...five more reasons to want to tear that man to shreds. at lest three of them involved Dave. the other two involve Dee and himself.

Dee first coming out of her box in The Flipside looking like the Puppet, but then shifting into looking like herself again when she sees Jack. and then shifting into the Puppet again when the fight starts. just. my Dee shapeshifting headcanon <3 (basically, after she died, Dee could shift her ghostly appearance into being either the Puppet or a ghostly version of herself)

Jack looking at Blackjack and just seeing a younger version of himself, frozen in time. this young man in his early twenties, his whole life ahead of him, who had all of that ripped away from him cruelly. his sister. his brother. himself. all by the same man. reduced to a snarling ball of rage, who wants nothing more than to rip Henry to shreds where he stands. the only reason he hasn't done so is because he's been convinced that doing so won't truly set him free. when Fredbear told Jack that, despite the souls desiring vengeance, killing their killer would not set them free, Blackjack took that to mean that it wouldn't set him free either. he's been stewing in his rage and grief for decades, neither feeling ever subsiding in that time. if anything, his rage has only increased. he lost everything because of Henry. why wouldn't he be angry? and so, if everyone else must move on, and leave him there to guard Henry and make sure he doesn't cause any problems, alone, then he will.

Jack finally helping to set him free, looking his younger self in the eyes and saying maybe that means that killing Henry is the one thing that will set him free. and even if it isn't...well, he needs to be dealt with, anyway. what if he gets out and causes problems again? just...Jack looking at Blackjack and feeling both like he's looking at a window into the past, yet also like he's looking at a different person entirely. because he and Blackjack are separate people, technically. but it's also him looking at himself.

Jack holding Dave's hand as they confront Henry, and squeezing it a little bit reassuringly. Dave tightening his grip as he gets more stressed.

Peter's death in the Henry fight being the thing that makes Jack say that their anger pushes them harder, and Dee's death leading to the line "We're gonna fuckin' FLAY you alive, Henry!" from Jack...like. just imagine how enraged he probably sounded, seeing Dee go down again. do you think it reminded him of the day she died? the day he went back to the diner to find her and bring her home, only for him to keep calling out for her and looking for her as the horror dawned on him that he couldn't find her? do you think that's what was running through his mind?

Jack and Dave reaching the end, and jack admitting that he can't go with them. Blackjack interjecting that...there is something they can try. no guarantee that it'll work, but it's worth a shot. Blackjack can try to fuse back together with him; not necessarily the same thing as shoving someone's soul back into their body, which is a big no no, apparently, but maybe a piece of him will break off, and it'll become Jack's soul. maybe them fusing will trick the universe into thinking Jack has a soul. who knows, but hopefully it'll work. and it does. Jack, by some miracle, gets his own soul out of this in a way that'll allow Blackjack to still exist. he also gets Free Afterlife Top Surgery™, because at this point he deserves it. he's been through so much shit.

at the end of the fire, Jack just looks at Dave and Blackjack and says "Come on, guys. Let's go home."

i just. aaaaaaAAAAAAAAA-

also, some Afterlife headcanons for y'all:

Peter: "Jackie, with all due respect, you have the weirdest taste in men." Jack just hanging out with Dave in the corner: "Peter, wtf-"

Steven just immediately laid down on the floor of the Afterlife and slept for a while. he was. So Fucking Tired.

Jack: "Okay, therapy circle time-" Dave: "Absolutely not, we don't have time to unpack all that." Jack: "Dave, we have nothing BUT time to unpack all of that-"

Peter and Caroline reunion <3

[princess-glassred]

I already have a Reddie Cinderella au but a fuckin Benverly Cinderella au where instead of searching for the girl who fits the slipper, beverly is searching for the boy who wrote the January Embers poem would be sooooo cute.

Poor Bev's just this princess who's being auctioned off by her creepy dad to the highest bidder like she's a hunk of meat. Pretty much every man in her life has given their unfiltered opinion on her and it's made her against marrying anyone (she does want to get married, but the men in the royal court have soured it for her). Her betrothed Tom Rogan is a piece of shit who ""sees her poential"" to be a good queen IF she's got a good man by her side to keep her in check.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the kingdom, is a poor orphaned servant named Ben hanscom. His daddy died serving for the royal gaurd and his mom passed away from an illness a couple years after, leaving him in the care of his step father Mr. Keene, his (slightly) younger step sister Greta and his older step brother Henry. Mr. Keene has Ben slaving away in his apothecary since he's fat and probably wouldn't be useful in snatching up a spouse anytime soon. He's treated like a black sheep, Greta likes getting him into trouble and being a jerk for no reason, while Henry likes to attack him with physical abuse and make jokes about his weight. Ben happens to like cleaning and working for Mr. Keene though, because he's logically minded and good at figuring out how things tecnically work (although its kinda degrading with Henry around to make fun of him all the time). It's worth noting that if Ben wasn't around Henry would probably be in the same situation, considering he's not actually Mr. Keene's son and was just sold to him by his dad for booze money.

Bev and Ben meet when she's pretending to be a maid to sneak away from her father, the only hint that she's even a princess is the palace key she keeps around her neck. She tells Ben her name is "Bevvie" to hide her identity and he buys it. The two become really fast friends after that, routinely visiting each other whenever they can. Ben even introduces her to his one and only friend, Mike the farm boy, and now all of them are kind of buddies. When the ball comes Ben has no interest in meeting princess Beverly (even though he assumes she's a wonderfully nice gal) he just wants to see bevvie again. Mostly because he wrote her a poem and neglected to give it to her before, so he HAS to give it to her at the ball. His step family ruin it though, because Ben's considered an embarassment and they can't have ANYONE interfering with Henry's attemps at marriage and Greta's wannabe socialite career. They rip up the poem right in front of him and it's quite heart breaking.

Just when all is lost though, Ben finds not one, but TWO fairy god parents here to help him. They introduce themselves as Richie Tozier and Eddie Kaspbrak, married couple, business men, and expert fairy god parents. They dress in modern clothes, which Ben finds very confusing, especially since 40 year old man in hawaiin shirt is hardly what comes to mind when you think "fairy god parent" but whatever. They seem well meaning enough, although they can't stop bickering for like 2 seconds to actually help. They bring back the poem to prove they're legit and give him all the cinderella fixings. Eddie is a little paranoid about Ben getting home on time though, so he gives him a midnight curfew so he leaves on time. Also Richie calls Ben haystack cause he sleeps in a barn lol.

The ball comes around and the usual stuff happens, Henry and Greta embarrass themselves, Bev hates everything about it, and Ben makes a grand entrance that shocks everyone. Ben is pretty shocked himself, as he realizes he's been friends with the princess all along and freaks tf out. Beverly instantly runs to him to ask where on earth he got that wonderfully designed suit and he mumbles out some bullshit excuse that doesn't really make sense. They fall in love but just as midnight comes around Ben remembers he forgot to give her the poem again! He leaves it behind by accident on the ground when he's running away, and bev's dad picks it up.

He seems interested in knowing who sent it, and for a moment Beverly honestly tells him she doesn't know because she met a lot of suitors last night. He insists they go searching for the guy, comparing hand writing to the post card from house to house. All while Bev just wants to get it over with so she can see Ben again and tell her how she really feels..

Sorry that was so long, i got really into the idea. I know i never make benverly stuff, so i wanted to try it.

[toxi-works-at-culvers]

also what are some of your headcanons for him? i'd love to know:)!

ohh i have so many thoughts about him, thank you for asking! :3c

some general stuff first i guess? i think he genuinely loved his kids! and i think that he also liked kids in general, since he opened up fredbear's and all. i don't think he was the best dad, but i think he genuinely tried. and i don't really like when he's portrayed as abusive because i don't feel like it makes sense for his character.

basic stuff: 6 ft 2 in tall, built like a fuckin twig, scariest gray/green eyes you will ever see. charming bastard smile. missing a tooth because he's definitely gotten into a fight before. wears purple in almost every outfit and dresses more formally than needed. bisexual. somewhere in his mid-30's in 1983

hobbies include robotics, designing animatronics, acting, journaling, and juggling (canon btw)

british. that's not even a headcanon but i feel like it's being forgotten lately (matthew curtis' voicelines for him + he's not gonna have an accent in the movie… sad!)

very afraid of death

has a very high opinion of himself

probably had a cat at one point. i feel like he would

i think his hair would start graying kind of early because of stress. the man's a workaholic and has definitely done more than a few all-nighters :P

i also think he got married kind of early (in his 20's or so) from societal pressure and also oopsies!! accidental pregnancy! so yeah. michael was an accident but william still loved him - but once elizabeth and evan were born william kind of ends up ignoring michael in favor of them. and that causes michael's teen angst to get especially angsty which is why the bite of 83 happens

he 100% used to have a thing with henry. there's no way they weren't at least a little fruity. (from the silver eyes, "a search of his house had found (…) stacks of journals full of raving paranoia, passages about henry that ranged from wild jealousy to near worship." tell me that's not homosexual.) but anyways they both have families now, yet william still lowkey kind of wants henry. but will never have him because they are both doomed by the narrative :) (edit to also say. they are like a divorced old couple tbh.)

his opinion about henry swaps around a lot. sees henry as being superior and better than him even if, technically, william has made wayyy more advanced animatronics. or sometimes thinks that he's the best and henry would be nothing without him.

and now his personality!! i kind of try to base most of it on how he's portrayed in the books, with my own touch added on. basically he's silly! he's a great actor and he's very theatrical. he's also very charismatic, good at interacting with people as well as getting what he wants. but underneath all that he's kind of an asshole, he's really selfish and only really cares about himself. he's egotistcal and he doesn't admit his faults because he thinks he can't be wrong. so yeah. (this actually got really long so i condensed it down. more elaboration under the cut)

gets springlocked and dies in 1993. returned to the fnaf 1 location because he wanted to destroy the old animatronics, thinking that it might free the souls and let him avoid their wrath or something idk. kind of backfired on him.

post springtrapping he's had a lot of time to reflect, but rather than feeling guilty he feels like he needs to get revenge. he wants to kill everyone who's ever wronged him and that's what keeps him going, even in death. (also the only one he might ACTUALLY somewhat regret is killing charlie, because of how it broke his relationship with henry. but otherwise he doesn't feel guilty at all.)

and most importantly, the fnaf 6 ending (with henry's speech) is canon and he's dead after that :) no glitchtrap, no mimic, no FUCKING FEAR GAS!1!1!11

(the original, longer version of his personality here lol) i think that william is actually a very silly goofy guy! he's dramatic, he's an entertainer and an actor as shown by how he acts when he's wearing the springbonnie suit. although he's definitely playing it up for an effect there, he's still kind of uhh. theatrical i think. but he's also very charismatic and could probably smooth talk his way out of prettty much anything, which is part of the reason he doesn't get arrested after the MCI (also the lack of evidence). at the same time he has kind of a weird vibe to him, you can just tell there's something wrong with this dude, like maybe he's trying a little too hard to look normal.

and thennnn there's what's beneath the surface. william is kind of insensitive, self-centered/selfish, and egotistical. he also absolutely refuses to admit his own faults or shortcomings. something bad happened? not his fault! he was wrong about something? no he wasn't! another thing, william is very paranoid and usually feels like anyone or anything could be a threat to him (mostly because of that one passage from the silver eyes, "had spent so much of his life fighting like a cornered rat." and ANOTHER thing from the silver eyes, "he had taken on the mantle of bitter sadism as an integral part of himself. he would strike out against others and revel in their pain, feeling righteously that the world owed him his cruel pleasures.")

at first he kills charlie because he wants to bring evan back, and feels he deserves some kind of revenge on henry because it was HIS animatronic that did the bite after all, right? but along the way he realizes he enjoys killing. and that it feels so good to have power when he hasn't for most of his life. so he keeps going, and eventually all that comes crashing down on him. and it's tragic! because he used to have what many would call a perfect life. but he completely ruined that with his own selfish desires.

[missredherring]

Mark Strong Masterlist

🌶️= spice

Archie (Rocknrolla)

Ask Prompts:

“I’m gonna come to your house with a giant fuckin’ boombox in my hands.”

“Fight me!” “You’re like three feet tall, stop telling people to fight you.”

“I’ll take care of it.”

“Remove the hand before I remove it for you.”

“Will you marry me?”

“We’re not having this conversation again.”

First kiss.

“Quick, kiss me!!” 🌶️

“I want to bend you over and fuck you until you can’t walk.”

"You look wonderful tonight."

The first time you cook for him and the Wild Bunch.

“What’s in it for me?”

"Thick thighs save lives." 🌶️ (Plus Size Reader)

"Welcome home, love."

“Then we better make this quick.”

A Real Mouthful 🌶️

“Can I suck you off?”

In the Quiet 🌶️

A month later Archie asks you to meet him in a parking garage. He opens the trunk of a car and shows you two bodies inside. You look down at them. The big one was knife-happy and it was the small one’s idea to brand you. You nod and the trunk is closed. The car will be dropped off at a warehouse by the docks and men will clean the mess up.

Speakeasy Slide

The shrill scream of a whistle broke the happy atmosphere of the club. A lightning strike of terror went through your body. It seemed like the entire bar froze, only to jump into action when the whistle sounded again.

Throw Your Spark Into Oil and Fire - Prequel

He’s a little surprised that his keys still work in the lock when he opens the door to his house. There’s a layer of dust on the foyer table he puts his bag down on. It feels wrong; still, quiet, empty, and cold. A small card had been knocked off by his bag. He picked it up and read it. “Welcome home. -Lenny.”

Marry Me, Archie

His pace slowed and he turned to you, his face carefully neutral. “What was that?”

Merlin x Reader x Archie:

Family Matters - Part One, Part Two

There, in the midst of bar crawlers, was a man who looked like the spitting image of Merlin.

Merlin (Kingsman)

Ask Prompts: 

“I’m gonna come to your house with a giant boombox in my hands and tell you that I love you.”

Quick! Kiss me!

A Night Out

"I love it when you grab the sheets when you’re about to cum." 🌶️

The moment Merlin realizes he’s in love with you.

“Fuck it. Might as well have fun, if we’re going to get caught.”

Purely staring at Reader's lips. 🌶️

“Why are you so jealous?”

The Tailor on Savile Row

The way you looked down at his handiwork and back at him with some awe made his chest ache. Your appreciation and admiration made him feel like an ordinary man. He hadn’t felt ordinary in a long time.

Drive On, Drive On - Part One, Part Two 

 It was the please that had you accepting the request, sending your ETA, and starting the car. At least this one was polite. Agents had been known to send demands or orders rather than requests. Sometimes they didn’t even bother going their locations, expecting the drivers to just know where they were.

Destiny Calls - Part One, Part Two

Rage surged and he wanted to rip Morgana to shreds. She knew that he’d come for Nimue. Across of the centuries, the many lives he’d lived and died, the one constant was Nimue and the boys. His search for her, for all of them, was what kept him sane. That and the hope that they could finally live together in peace again. But Morgana would always rise along side them and death would come shortly after.

A Man Possessed

Merlin is possessed by the spirit of Lord Henry Blackwood.

A Letter From the Dead

"I got a birthday card from a friend in which she’s written 'You already know everything I’d write in here.' I can understand that; I feel more than words can say. But that was still pretty shitty of her, and I’m going to give it a try."

Slow Hands

“Oh, you’re doing the dishes? Bless your heart.” He smiled when he heard you behind him. Then he yelped and jerked back, splashing water out of the sink and two freezing hands touched the back of his neck.

Stealing Moments

This was a mission, you reminded yourself, but you could enjoy moments like this, right?

[mrmcflowers]

Game theory

I'm so tireed but this wqas insane ramble I went on with my brother and uh lore. Theory. Game. So. I think that the fnaf 2 animatronics were mainly designed by Henry but the engineering was done by William (Because of the mediocre melodies it seems like his MO might be plastic instead of Willaim's fabric plush-based designs.) William gets an actual divorce from his wife and she takes Elizabeth (That's why there is an empty girls bedroom in the minigames) So william is having a bad time! Henry is still goin trying to be the best he can be but like his family is totally normal and nothing is wrong. william kills Charlie/Cassidy/whatever over some probably dumb shit. William goes home and CC has run back to freddy's in hopes to see his sister again since they used to play there. henry and william get a divorce (Henry doesn't know what happened but heavily suspects him). Willaim still has partial ownership of the freddy's name so he takes over the Freddy's location in 1st so he can be an ass in his own restaurant without Henry catching on. But he realizes ohhh shit the daughter is still like... alive. So he kills a few more children and stuffs them into the freddy's 1 suits. (i think that the og suits in fnaf 2 are the same suits in fnaf 1 but henry has them where he can keep an eye on them and as they've rotted has tried to fix them somewhat but gave up realizing that it's sort of not worth it! More worth it to hunt down william and destroy him and set these kids free.) CC sees it happen (Or knows how Charlie died I haven't 100% figured out the timeline) and is rightfully scared of his dad (That's where he goes from the switch to loving freddy's ("He's gone back to that place again" and having his birthday be there probably annually to being scared shitless.) Henry sort of finds out so kicks William kind of out of the business (this is where he adopts the fnaf 1 animatronics), William still can't go back so he makes his own animatronics to further his research into the whole possession thing. He tries to make them seem like the animatronics Henry makes (plastic) thus, the sister location animatronics first two based off his ex wife and daughter he doesn't get to see. CC sees someone getting yoinked with funtime freddy (Fnaf 4 Fredbear could be a mix of the og yellow bear and funtime freddy.) CC dies at some point (I am so tired and the lore is so jumbled) And William blames it on mike so he neglects Mike even harder and goes really deeply into making the funtimes so he can try and fix his "Good" son. He still gets partial visitation (That's why no adult has noticed his funky ass killer animtronics because no /adults/ have contact with him. And neither or his kids would fuckin snitch because they're afraid of him. He makes Baby sets it up, it kills elizabeth which REALLY fucks him up because like, CC (in his mind) was prob a cry baby and mike was a fuck up. Elizabeth was prob his favorite! Especially because she doesn't look like him and he doesn't have to raise her. Mike is reflection of himself and he hates it. Mike might go leave and live with his mother for a while (Mike "Scmidt") and maybe goes no contact while William continues to spiral? Idk the rest BUT This is sort of unrealted but I think the glamrocks are inspired by Henry's designs, not Williams. All plastic and nice. Maybe even Monty was a scraped mediocre melody (He's fit with the southern mismatched farm theme.) They also seem way closer to the toy animatronics then the ogs. Anyway that was my incoherant tired ramble.

[rockcattomato]

Been relistening to the first season (Third time round) now that I have Patreon so I can hear the bonus episodes. And, idk if it was in one of the first Seven talking dads or not, but I’ve been thinking about something will said.

He was talking about reading a book about writing, and it said for your characters that you needed to think about what your character liked, what they hated, and what they wanted more than anything else in the world.

And they went through, one by one. And said what they’re character’s answers were.

I’m not going to say all of them but if you haven’t listened to this take a moment to sit and think about the answered, I sure wish I had had the chance.

Ok, ready?

Henry liked nature (ofc), he hated any sort of conflict, and he wanted more than anything else, to eb what he considered perfect. This is amazing and I love Henry for it. Bc deep inside every aspect of his character is his hypocrisy. He wears leather Birkenstocks, his favourite TV show isn’t actually the sunrise, he hates conflict and yet can’t control his own emotions. He wants more than anything else to be free of this, to be perfect. (We can discuss how this affects Lark, Sparrow, and Normal later if you would like).

On to Ron. I’ve forgotten what he hated. He like organisation. And more than anything else, he wanted to be the only voice in his own head. Someone asked oh so like Willie’s voice? And Beth said no, he wants to be the only person in his head, he doesn’t care who, but he doesn’t want their voice. So much of Ron’s character is just him making decisions outside of the norm, he is original, he is weird. And yet, he is what he believes to be a businessman. Everything that he does, while still being insane. Is formed by societies pre formed values, and its so interesting when you pay attention to how constricted Ron is by them.

Next up, Darryl. He liked the team, he liked community. He wanted more than anything else for those he cared about to be safe. And what he hated? What Darryl hates, is who he thinks he is. If you listen back to the beginning, he despises himself at the start. I’m just gonna let you sit with that one.

And finally, Glenn Close. He’s a joke, he’s a rockstar. He’s cool. He likes drugs and music and his life bc he’s fuckin awesome man (overall, it’s freedom). He hates cops, rules, people telling him what to do. And what he wants more than anything else? For everything to stay the same man! Bc his like is awesome and he likes it just the way it is. (Just imagine all that in Freddy’s voice, it makes sense dont worry). Except, you know what happens? It changes. In every way imaginable, he loses his son he gets his wife back only to find out she’s not even his, he fucking dies man. For Glenn, out of all the dads, nothing stays the same.

Ignore me, thinking about these insane weirdos. I love them, and have been thinking about this for weeks.

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 5/9/2023

i almost never devour a book in one sitting without getting distracted, i rarely scrub back to the beginning of a scene to immediately rewatch it, and i have never force-quit a video game in order to immediately replay the level, but all of those things happened this week. cowboy machine go brrr.

listening

wolf by the yeah yeah yeahs (sextile remix). neo noir movie music, long establishing interior shot as you move through a dim mirrored lounge, making eye contact with all the denizens before the diegetic music cuts back in.

rare remix where i like the remix much better than the original. driving and pleasantly jangly, grooveable with some velocity to it. music to feel like a lone wolf protagonist to. spotify link

the release radar is one of spotify's best features and i wish something as set-and-forget existed for bandcamp

reading

Lone Women by Victor LaValle is a gothic horror western. only part of the gothic horror is due to the familial burden placed upon eldest sisters. this book is largely concerned with inheritance, sisterhood and female friendship (in scare quotes and otherwise) but not in a TERFy way.

Adelaide Henry carries an enormous steamer trunk with her wherever she goes. It’s locked at all times. Because when the trunk opens, people around Adelaide start to disappear. (bookshop.org link)

i try to read a couple reviews before writing my own, and there’s been a lot of grumbling that this book is comprised solely of diversity points. to which i say: do you really think interracial lesbians and trans people and autistic kids did not exist in 1915??? this is a pretty typical friend group. the weirdos band together.

i liked this book a great deal and had a good time with it. however, i think the denouement comes together a little too pat. i would have liked this book to be slightly longer than its 306 print pages. there are a lot of characters to juggle and there are two specifically i would have liked to see more so they feel a little less deus ex machina. however x2, i am deeply grateful to LaValle's wife who insisted on this specific ending. there are tragedies that happen in the book, but the book is not a tragedy.

there are in fact a fuck of a lot of threads being carried at all times, despite all these threads coming together somewhat unevenly in the last few chapters. there is a literary sleight of hand so effective (bc you are so relieved a group of characters hasn’t died and THEN so many things immediately happen) that you completely forget to question why the fuck this group left and came back in the first place (although you can come up with a satisfactory answer on your own by like. thinking for a minute). the suspense is sustained and effective as well, i was worried the whole time about something and devoured it in one sitting without getting up (mack, curled up against my side in bed, appreciated this a lot).

how scary is this book? more suspense and dread. there are very few detailed descriptions, there is simply. a lot of blood.

how horny is this book? i do very much like the pair of secondary lesbians (bisexuals? unclear. could be both/either. the distinction would not come for nearly another sixty years anyway). i complain a lot about when women aren’t horny enough, but if you make them both willing to fucking kill in a blink for each other and give me an achingly tender scene like this, im fine with this fairly tame level of horny!

watching

A scruffy garbage boy becomes the pupil of a famed gunfighter, and the stage for confrontation is set when the gunman overruns the boy's town through violence and corruption.

as an orphan with daddy issues, Day of Anger (1967, dir. Valerii) really fuckin hit for me. it's also an a-tier western i would let other people watch, slightly clunky at times but killingly sincere. really fun and unusual jazzy score, good camerawork. i really loved this but am having difficulty explaining why. it's coherent? do you know how rare that is for a spaghetti western???

it also has the best one minute forty-four seconds in any western ever, imo. why the fuck not have a joust!!! i do not watch spaghetti westerns for their restraint or subtlety!!! the HAHAHA SICKOS.meme moments, where it really fucking embraces its genre, are some of the best moments in the film. more FUCK yeah WHY NOT moments in other movies please.

this is one of lee van cleef's three "tutorship" movies (along with Death Rides A Horse and For A Few Dollars More), where he gets paired up with the spaghetti western version of a james bond girl. i don't remember who tagged one of my posts but he really is peak evil dilf here. the way he sets up his own destruction because he as a person cannot do anything else is just. pour it into my open mouth. yes thank you yumyumyum

it is not a complex plot, but thought and care was put into it. scott mary, the van cleef boy in this film, has a real character arc and an ambiguous ending. along with the score and lvc at his evil best, this is a novel example of a spaghetti western. the two-hour cut is here for free on tubi btw.

ty to @pasta-pardner for complaining that no one was talking about this movie, bc apparently that's a really effective hook for me. i love to feel exclusive.

playing

call of juarez: gunslinger, and i have finally determined that it was free on steam a couple two-three years ago and that's how i obtained it. mystery solved.

the conceit of this arcadey episodic first person shooter: you are semi-retired bounty hunter Silas Greaves, telling stories in a saloon to get free drinks out of your audience. the level can rapidly change as Silas' story changes: as he remembers things or as audience members argue with him. this is overall a pretty successful schtick and continues to be silly goofy fun.

i had so much fun with the first train level, where you are scrambling up through a derailed train over a ravine, that i immediately replayed it. i have never ever done this with a video game before. everything feels so precarious, it encourages speed without literally blowing the track up behind you. it is VERY fun to kick down train car doors and go into bullet time. it is VERY fun to defend a tunnel with a gatling gun. imo the sort of gleeful high-velocity gunfights this game wants you to have work best when you are fighting through a fairly contained level like a train-- the maps where you are running and gunning through an entire town can feel a little overwhelming.

the maps are generally the kind of over the top nonsense you expect from a spaghetti western-- in one level you are scrambling around under/on top of/through a giant trestle bridge trying to stay alive and deactivate some dynamite so the bridge and train stay unexploded. you fight through the ricketiest mine you can imagine! you fight on a steamboat beached in a swamp! you fight in a flooded graveyard in the same swamp! this game is not pretty, per se, but it is handsome. it uses vertical space really well.

the level with Indians is both better and worse than i hoped. Silas is after some Apaches who have escaped their reservation, and is sympathetic about them wanting off the reservation, but you sure do have a whole level about shooting guys anyway. this game leans really hard into, like, woo-woo nature medicine man abilities. luckily they are contained to the one level. this is pretty okay for 2013 (a named tribe, a sympathetic portrayal, they are defending instead of attacking or kidnapping) but they could have done better then and they can do better now.

additionally, i have some beef with the duel minigame-- im old. my reflexes are Not Good. there's a mexican standoff where there are three different things to keep track of and i have failed that duel seventeen times. i may be soft-locked due to a skills issue.

making

fallow week. im kind of frozen with fear about moving prep and really need to kick shit into gear despite the fact it is all very expensive and very scary. even when you have local people to look at apartments for you, the mere thought of renting an apartment without like Being There and seeing what the light is like and poking around under cabinets for mold and interrogating the neighbors is deeply uncomfy for me.

but onward! because we have to!

[skyblueartt]

❓

🎭

🐻❔

Headcanon game!

Thanks for the ask!!! Just prefacing this saying that I’m a relatively very new FNAF (the videos games, I don’t know much of anything about the book universe) fan! These are just random ideas I have :)

🐻❔Mrs. Emily- Ohh boy this is a character I honestly don’t have a ton of headcanons for yet! I didn’t even think of a name for girly. BUT I once saw somebody use the name ‘Hazel’ for Mrs. Emily and I like that one a lot!! Hmm I can’t explain why, but I totally headcanon Henry as gay LOL right, so my HC is that…he’s in denial for some time about this, gets with a woman, and said woman ends up getting pregnant. Because of this, getting married feels like an obligation to them, I guess. But I HC that the two separated a few years later because Henry was very unhappy and he knew that he wasn’t making his wife happy either. I TOTALLY HC that leading up to the divorce, he’d tell his wife (I guess I’m calling her Hazel now!) that he’d “be at work late” when in reality he was at the bar drinking with William after work and venting about how nervous and unhappy he was…ummmmmmmmm Mr. Emilyyyyy lying like that is not good !!! :( he did not feel good about it tho. Honestly I feel like she got the vibe that he didn’t like the ladies. I HC that after the divorce they’re not on bad terms, it’s just a little awkward. Idk! My headcanon is that Henry loved Charlie more than anything in the world, and hey, Hazel was happy that he was a very loving father to her. There’s that at least lmaooo

❓Sammy Emily: AHHhhhh I’m gonna be so real with you, I got nothin :( I’m so sorry Sammy I’m sure you’re a wonderful kiddo- but I’m like, a person who knows absolutely nothing about the books 😅 when I was like formulating my own interpretation/understanding of fnaf’s lore and characters from the video games I totally didn’t know that Sammy existed so to lowkey just. Retconned him unknowingly so ahh SORRY, SAMMY :’0

🎭Charlie Emily: CHARLIEEE ohhh I love her! I randomly headcanon that she was about 7-ish when she died, but honest to god that is just the first random age that popped into my head. I feel like she’s a rough-n-tough little kid, like a little tomboy. She LOVES being outside, she looooves exploring, she loves being independent and doesn’t understand why she can’t just go exploring alone all the time!! (We later see what happens when she um. Wanted to explore alone at night one time. I’m so sad ). Type of kid to collect rocks and bugs and enjoys playing in the mud and. Man I feel like she either played baseball or soccer. Idk, I just feel like she would

I LOVE to think that she’s fascinated by her dad’s robots! Whenever she gets to go to the workshop with him, she’s fuckin trilled. She peaks her head up over the big desk and just watches with stars in her eyes :’) Henry picking her up and letting her get a closer look at the animatronics-

“Pretty cool, huh kiddo?”

“Uhh YEAHH!!!”

Charlie loves to make people laugh, especially her dad! She loves both of her parents, of course, but she’s a daddy’s girl at heart. Her dad is cool because he lets her eat pizza for breakfast and they stay up late watching movies on the weekends.

I feel like she’s besties with Elizabeth, I just am obsessed with this idea. She likes Evan but they don’t talk a lot, since I feel like Evan was a pretty quiet kiddo. She really likes Mike tho, she views him like her cool older “cousin” :)

Her favorite color in the whole wide world of GREEN. She probably begs her dad to paint her bedroom green. Since I feel like she’s such an outdoorsy kid, maybe green reminds her of nature!

AhhhHh mannnnn. I need a good timeline AU because I love this kiddo. Charlie you’re a real one, sorry your dad’s best friend was a freak

[yallemagne]

I dunno if I'm gonna include citations because I can't. I just. Don't make me read Harry's words.

DROSIAN SORId DORINA

DORIAN finally has thoughts of his own-- and yeah, his first draft was shitty-- but he feels remorse for his cruel words and lack of sympathy and the desire to make right by Sibyl. Now, too little too late, but it's a sign of humanity. And we don't exactly know whether he actually does want to do the right thing or if he's so scared of the possibility that his cruelty makes him a bad person that he's just doing whatever he can to repent. He does say to Henry that he's afraid he isn't feeling as bad as he should, but that's a natural response to death. He's in shock and has not had much time to process, and if Sibyl died for her grief then what is he to do??

Either fucking way, Henry sees Dorian's first thoughts and PISSES ALL OVER THEM. Henry sees Dorian feeling remorse and says BLAH I WOULD KILL TO HAVE SOMEONE DIE FOR ME. (Dorian's portrait is noting that down for later /j.)

He isn't comforting Dorian, he's just saying "You're FINE. You're blameless. It's fucking good that the bitch died. Honestly, it's poetic. Women love being abused, why else would they take it? I wish someone would die because of me, then I'd have a reason to love." Henry, I wish you'd die for me, choking on your own dick, you massive bitch. You absolute stain of a man.

This is the part where it is Henry's fault. Dorian is so willing to accept whatever makes him a good person, and he's having a (slightly) older man tell him that he doesn't need to feel bad for anything, that it's just good that there's nothing linking him to the death or else he'd be suspected as a murderer. Dorian was so willing to marry Sibyl and keep his promise, but he learns "oh, she's dead? oh, I wouldn't have needed to apologize even if she had lived? that makes it so much easier! I'm still a good person!"

Wilde should have fuckin given Sibyl two gay dads and just had her live like I asked. It wouldn't make the book... inherently better... but I'd be less angry.

Also, tiny lil footnote, but the foreshadowing--

Was it all true? Had the portrait really changed? Or had it been simply his own imagination that had made him see a look of evil where there had been a look of joy? Surely a painted canvas could not alter? The thing was absurd. It would serve as a tale to tell Basil some day. It would make him smile.

--has got me FUCKED UP.