#He's the blog mascot now (?)

[bunnygirllover45]

Johann's very rushed info sheet.

[theguiltygearheritageposts]

(EDIT: Using this pinned to share a link about a way to help Palestine. There are many more ways so please do your research https://www.tumblr.com/borrelia/744888893446537216/very-good-things-have-happened-in-the-notes-of?source=share)

Here comes a...n explanation about where have I been

Hello there, @theguiltygearheritageposts mod here. Like the title says, I wanted to explain why I haven't been here much except for reblogging current issues posts, for their awareness.

I've been quite busy with real life stuff.

While as always I still love Guilty Gear, I do experience burnouts. I have been in a sort of "hiatus by default except whenever something gg-related catches my interest" state for a while in my other gg blog, after all.

The 1 (or 2? I'm so out the loop right now I can't properly remember lol) year long queue for this blog ran out and, while I should try refill it, I didn't feel like it.

So, is this blog still active? I don't know, I think the type of hiatus mentioned above would be a good fit. Were there a lot of interest, I could lend this blog's handling to someone that really wants to tend it.

I'm still going to reblog (not gg related) awareness/resources posts about current world affairs when able, because they can have some level of awareness here.

Though, if I get submissions of posts, an occasional guilty gear heritage post might pop here and there. Preferably, were a huge ammount of submissions to be sent, I'd take a good while or not be able to queue them.

I am aware this isn't the best, most exciting outcome but I hope it's alright.

Thanks you all, especially to all the people who have ever chimed in to reblog, like or say something nice. You're the reason why the good corners of this fandom are so worth it!

[the-witchs-cafe]

Hop from Pokemon Sword and Shield would turn into a witch in Puella Magi Madoka Magica!

Cause of Witchification: All his life, Hop believed that he was destined to become just like his big bro, and that he had what it took to achieve just that; to carve his name unto stone and begin the tale of his legend, all in the efforts to make his brother proud as he walked in his footsteps. After all, he's attributed his vast knowledge on Pokemon battles to him continuously recording and rewatching Leon's matches, and, in a sense, Leon was the closest thing he had to a father figure; of course it'd be natural to be like the person he admires most.

In truth, the air of pride and arrogance he had showcased throughout the game's first half was nothing but a front; he had nothing to his name, a fact that has been hammered unto his head time and time again as he kept on losing to both Bede and the player with no time to breathe in between these hopeless matches- and, in the back of his mind, he knew that. After all, the walls of their home only displayed the memorabilia of Leon, with nothing to remember Hop by; an air of competition was bred by the other figures of authority in Hop's life, whether any of them were aware of the effects of their favoritism or not.

Hop looked up to his big brother - how could one not when his face has been plastered over every nook and cranny across Galar? -, he practically idolized him, so when he was presented with the reality that his pathetic display of weakness was doing nothing but tarnishing his big brother's name, it destroyed what little hope he had in himself and prompted him to take up other methods of battling that were so...unlike him. He even had to abandon Wooloo, his first partner, under the belief that it is was for the best if he had to live up to Leon's name, even after he had promised that they would be in the pokemon league together.

In the end, even after stopping Eternatus thanks to his intuition and knowledge, even after saving all of Galar with the player, his self-worth has been reduced to nothing. After witnessing his childhood friend defeat his hero, he realized that...there was nothing left for him. Everyone's moving on with their lives, including Leon, and he is now there left in the dark; lost after chasing the light of legend that is eternally so far away...

"You know, even when Sonia was saying that you and me looked like we could become heroes, I never really felt like one…"

Estimated time of witchification is speculated to be either during the aftermath of the second Darkest Day or in the middle of the post-game story.

[wacky-wonders]

will anybody help him :[

(+ a little speedpaint just for fun )

[scramblecat]

woaaaah holy shit blog color scheme update… cyan and magenta had a good 4 year run and I pay my respects. it is time however for my Signature Color to replace them

[sealofarchives]

I’m nom nom eating your blog

Donnie: I’m not going to question how that person is eating op’s blog-

Laverne: OP greatly appreciates the message lol (btw requests are still open soooo~ :3c)

[curlyflesh]

symbolism - POLLE

a mutual of mine pointed out that polle & anya’s text colors are the same, if not similar shades of blue. while we know that the anya symbolism we got during jimmy’s ‘purgatory’ hallucinations was the womb/pony centipede, the final polle scene at the top of the mouthwash hill could be one too

at first, i thought polle might have represented a godly figure that will pass judgment (considering polle is the mascot for the corporation), but i think she could also represent a fragment of anya that jimmy neglected, a part of her he didn’t hurt…

i know people have observed that through jimmy’s eyes, anya switches the way she talks to him since he’s her abuser. she cheers him on when he accomplishes something, she shrinks when he gets upset. at first she’s very enthusiastic and sweet, but then she becomes insecure and apologetic

so i’m like …. maybe the final polle hallucination is a part of anya that reflects who she truly is, someone who is wise cunning and self-assured, like her last moments when she is a door away from him,, she uses the rest of her strength to choose her own ending, albeit painful

polle is passing judgment now because anya didn’t get to. this is a parallel to the psych eval that anya didn’t want to perform with jimmy and not to mention the whole cartoon horse sexual fantasy thing …. it connects to this so ironically in an awful way. the pony baby, polle as anya…

“why are you still so concerned with him?”

this is probably one of my favorite lines of the game. after every purgatory scene he fails to take responsibility for the crew. after his epiphany/breakdown in front of curly, he misuses anya’s words to apologize to curly only. but polle knows damn well failing curly wasn’t his worst moment. why does polle know? yeah.

it makes the ending of the game even more fucked up. the fact that that was jimmy’s last chance to feel guilt, after the womb scene And the ID hallway where he doesn’t even conjure up her face but he continued to completely disregard her in yet Another dehumanizing form, as the pony express mascot.

i’m sure there’s even more to consider (like the very first scene where jimmy crashes the ship and sees polle), but yeah that’s all i got for now! check out my blog for even more analyses :)

[waywardsou2]

Logan x Trans!MaleReader

Reblogged from my writing blog

Summary: Being a mutant was hard enough as it is, but being on trans on top of that. Well, you might as well be cursed. Luckily Logan has your back when it counts the most.

Word Count: 2.1k

Tags: misgendering, dysphoria, transphobia, comforting, fluff, slurs

You were in charge of the supply run for the school this week. It was always strange carrying around Charles’ credit card, over the years he had been able to invest in stocks- knowing when they would dip and rise, he had amassed money from government funding and social projects, as well as working many jobs over the decades he has been alive so he had more than enough money to provide for all of the children at his school, but still the sum baffled you.

But if it meant that the school could stay stocked and at the highest capacity to care for the children, and the teachers living in the school then you didn’t think on it too hard.

You went about grabbing what you needed by the handful and stocking your trolley. Even grabbing a few extra things for you and Logan. Any time you had been on shift to go for the supply run you made sure to grab some extra snacks for Logan and you to keep in your room. You grabbed a bag of Skittles for yourself and some Recess cups for Logan (you had no idea how he could stand eating those).

As you were grabbing some breakfast cereals to stock the cabinet with you overheard a group of people whispering behind you. You turned and out of the corner of you eye saw them pointing at you as they continued to talk

“Why does she look like that? She looks like some cringe teenager?”

“Who does she think she’s fooling with that hair cut?”

“She was probably in prison and is growing it out”

Their voices were hushed but sounded like thunderclaps in your ears

She

She

She

You dropped the box of cereal you were holding, it made a skittering sound as it crunched on the floor. Your heart rate increased as their words reverberated around your mind, your chest tightening and not from your binder. Why today?

“Young miss? You dropped this” A middle-aged lady come into your view as you stared at the box on the floor, its bright logo staring you in the face. It’s mascot smiling gleefully. Her hand came into view as she picked up the box and handed it back to you. Trying to snap your self out of your downwards spiral you smiled sheepishly at her but the smile didn’t meet your eyes.

“Thank you” you took the box and shoved it into your cart. She smiled back at you and continued with her own shopping

The group from before were now snickering at you, before you could grab the last box you needed and head to the checkout the tallest boy in the group threw a packet of biscuits at you and said “Hey tranny, shouldn’t you be in the circus or something?”

The whole group laughed but you just stared. You turned around to face them, glaring them down with as much hate you could muster. All of it was controlled like a grenade ready to explode, the blast steadily building with each second passing as the chemical reaction grew inside the chamber.

Right now, it was anger, bubbling and building but never exploding. All the rage being pent up as you walked towards the checkout. Your feet felt heavy, your footsteps echoing more than last time as you stomped down the isles. Your heart beat fiercely but you looked on blankly, your eyes seeing but not processing what was in front of you. You just wanted to get out of here and get home. Go back to the school and hide away.

Deep down you just wanted to be seen. Being a mutant was hard enough as it was, having to keep a secret from the world and everyone who would ever know you outside of the school. And now, no matter how hard you tried the world still didn’t see you how you were. As a young boy, just like any other human.

But you weren’t, you weren’t and you would never be. Because society decided to define you based on your internal organs and bone structure. Just thinking about it made you irritated. That notion occupied your thoughts quite often and it angered you, all this hate and bigotry towards a group of people because they were simply different. Why did everyone else get to decide your fate? Why did they get to decide who you were and who you were supposed to be? It was bullshit.

As you drove back to the school you anger leaked out. It showed in the whites of your knuckles as you gripped the steering wheel. In the crease at the top of your nose in between your two brows. In the speedometer on your car screaming higher and higher as you broke the speed limit two times over, your foot flat to the floor on the pedal.

As you pulled into the gravel driveway the car screeched to a stop as you cut the ignition and yanked of your seat belt, opening the door with more force than necessary and slamming it shut with equal strength.

You began grabbing bags out of the trunk and bringing them to the kitchen. Leaving them with a few of the kids who smiled and thanked you as they began unpacking the bags you placed on the bench. Their smiles were genuine and warm as they helped you put the items away. You went back for the last bag and as you shut the boot and took a step away from your car you turned and came face to face with Logan. Almost bumping directly into him. You jumped and almost dropped the bag

“Jesus Logan, we need to get you a bell or something”

He chuckled but looked playfully disgusted by the idea.

“I’m not a cat” he laughs at you

“Well you already have the ears and the claws” you say pointing at the curls in his hair.

He laughs and gives you a punch in the arm as he reaches forward to take the bag from your hand. But you don’t let him take it. Usually you would have let him help you but today you didn’t.

It was stupid really, the reason you held onto he bag. The masculine clique of being strong and being able to provide had entered your mind on the way home, all the overcompensating masculine cliques imaginable had played out in your mind as you tried to combat the dysphoria that was consuming your brain.

He tilted his head at you when you pulled away from him but he didn’t press you any further. He walked along side you as you took the last of the groceries to the kitchen and put them away with the help of the few kids that were still unpacking the bags. You moved through the kitchen in a whir, putting things in their place at record time and then depositing the bags back into your car before walking back inside.

Now with nothing to do you felt to wired, to unoccupied. You didn’t want to talk about what was on your mind. You were to mad about. But slowly that anger began to dissolve. The feeling hollowing out your chest, taking up space and crushing your organs.

You had managed to evade Logan in your flurry around the kitchen, not that you meant to but you just weren’t thinking. Your mind was so full but blank. Like TV screen playing static. Numbly you walked to your shared room with Logan, you pulled off your shirt and looked at yourself in the mirror with your binder on. There was a slight pudge out the arm holes from the extra weight your binder couldn’t hold. You didn’t get it. You looked like a boy, like any other man you might have seen on the street. So how did they know? How were you still being misgendered? The thought made you angry again and you glared at yourself in the mirror, getting mad at your own face for betraying you. You pulled your binder up over your head. But because you hadn’t been careful to pull up from the arms first it got stuck, with your arms caught at an awkward angle

You tried to grab at the binder but couldn’t pull it up and over your head. You heard a knock on the door, and you ducked out of view, turning around so that your back faced the door as Logan’s voice accompanied the previous knocking. “Hey, you good?”

You sigh frustratedly, how was this the third time this week you had been caught like this “No���I’m stuck, again”

The door opened and clicked shut quickly as you heard Logan walk up behind you.

“Trying to get it off, or back on?”

You contemplated telling him you were putting it back on, but you had been wearing it for 6 hours already and you ribs were hurting, you knew you were pushing your limits. You sighed and told him to help you take it off.

Gently he grabbed onto the fabric and pulled it over your head, making sure to keep his hands away from your skin as much as possible as he freed you from your predicament.

You snatched your hoodie off the end of your bed and pulled it back on. Adjusting it so your body underneath was hidden, and your curved figure became blocked out and flatter.

He looked at you as you adjusted you hoodie with a sad and now knowing smile on his face.

“What happened” he asked softly

You stopped fussing with your shirt and you looked at him. All the anger from before was completely gone, and instead, the was replaced with the sting of sadness and the feeling of tears welling up behind your eyes.

You bit the inside of your cheek hoping that it would deter the tears in your eyes, but it didn’t. You didn’t know how to explain it, you didn’t want to say it to him. You felt pathic and you were embarrassed, but your heart ached.

It shouldn’t have bothered you but it did, and you didn’t know how to tell him

“Why don’t they see me” you couldn’t explain what had happened but you didn’t need to. He got the gist of it.

He pulled you forward into him softly, holding you against him and locking his arms around your back. Keeping you pressed closed to his chest. Your head resting right over his heart. The organ beating rhythmically and acting as a metronome that was grounding you.

The sound of his life brought you calmly back to earth, bringing you here into the moment, pulling you out of the hole you had been spiralling down. His deep long breaths added to the grounding atmosphere that he had created between the two of you. Those negative feelings were slowly fading away from you, the same way that mud and filth dripped down your fingers as you washed your hands clean of it.

It fell away from you and left you feeling clearer, lighter and calmer.

You closed your eyes and breathed deeply following the rhythm he set naturally and took it in, leaving behind the past hour and reveling in the comfort of this moment. Appreciating every moment you could take with him, basking in the glow that radiated from him whenever the two of you were together.

And in this moment, everything faded away except the two of you. And all of that pain and anger and fear melted away.

He placed a kiss on the strands of your hair and then rested his chin on your head.

“You will always be one of the strongest, most capable men I’ve ever met. And anyone who doesn’t see that is a joke”

You pulled away so you could look at him, and your eyes softened, you could see the pure unbridled love in his face as he looked at you. He cupped your face and pulled you in for a kiss, and that last bit of negativity slipped away from you.

Who cared about what other thoughts of you, they didn’t know you and they didn’t matter. Logan knew you, and he loved you however you were. He would never let you forget that because when he had met you at Charles’ school there was no doubt in his mind that you were the most beautiful man he had ever seen.

And that feeling never changed, each time he saw you no matter what state you were in or what you were wearing, each and every time, you would always be beautiful.

It didn’t matter what your body looked like under your clothes; it didn’t matter what society said you were supposed to be. All that you were, in its truest form, was more than he could have ever asked for in a partner. It didn’t matter to him that you were transgender because you were you. And that was enough for him, he hoped one day that you would be enough for you too.

This one goes out to all of my trans brothers out there, keep fighting boys. You've made it this far you can keep going!

And once again, I take requests. If you would like a one shot like this one or any of my other works then send me an ask!

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Hi maggots, it's Asmi!

It seems we have arrived at That Point again, when I need a new intro post. So here we are! The Official (kidnapped) Good Omens Mascot and uh Maggot Prince has returned with a fresh post.

First, before I talk about myself, here are some important links that people ask me for and I want to make sure they're accessible:

The Official Maggots Server of Doom on Discord: The server of kindness and chaos and brainrot where we just vibe (I promise you'll be welcome there, whoever you are, maggot, so many people who were shy are now screeching at me and I love that). Link here.

Weirdly-Specific-But-Ok The Youtube Channel: Yes, thanks to the 10khaos post, I made a Youtube channel. I intend to cause a lot of chaos on it, I have already begun. Hehe. Link here.

My Ko-fi: Ummmm this exists? Wahoo a Ko-fi. No pressure and I appreciate you all whether you're a silent lurker, causing chaos, supporting me with words or supporting me on Ko-fi. I love you. Link here.

My PO address and email: I'D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU, SNAIL MAIL OR MAIL OR OTHERWISE! Link here.

The Good Omens Ad: A lot of you ask me what Good Omens is about. Never fear! I wrote an advertisement for it ages ago, and @1800ineedshelp edited it fabulously. Link here.

Okay I think that's the important parts, I'll edit it later, and now... uh HELLO!

I'm Asmi, I'm 20 years old, he/him, very queer and probably napping at any given moment of the day. Because of a chaotic post, I now have a fandom. My fans, such as they are, are known as maggots. There is a lot of significance behind that (accidentally, I just picked it because it looked like mascot kind of).

I am the Official Good Omens Mascot, because I was kidnapped by the fandom in January after I made a summary post of Good Omens without watching it, just by what I saw on my tumblr dash. I have grown very fond of this title and the fandom, and have since watched the show (some episodes twice).

Also, this blog is a safe space for all queer people, and yes that includes aroace-spec people, trans people, all queer people. If you don't agree with that, there's the door *points to a pit of boiling sulphur*.

ANYWAY YES ENOUGH TALKING WELCOME TO THE CHAOS JUST BE KIND AND RESPECTFUL OF EACH OTHER, BE AS IRREVERENT TO ME AS POSSIBLE, AND WE'LL GET ALONG GREAT. YOU DON'T NEED TO INTERACT TO BE PART OF THIS FAMILY, EVERYONE IS WELCOME! WAHOO!

[if you see talk of spare organs, the Wibbles Incident, Fae kidnapping, Red Bull-induced madness, me thirsting over Crowley etc, don't worry about it, it's normal here. just be careful when gardening and/or fishing is mentioned, it's a trap.]

I LOVE YOU!

[croucify]

✶ hamzahthefantastic universal studios hcs

A/N: this is based on los angeles universal studios btw aaand don’t have any ideas for fics rn so i finished this draft i started when i was on vacation!!!! if u have any reqs send em in <3

✶ gets u both early access for the mario world, waking u up SOOOO early so u guys can be first in line before it gets long

✶ points at EVERYTHING he sees in the park

“oh my god is that yoshi?”

“babe holy shit, they have pinocchio from shrek as the cinema attendant for the tickets”

✶ when it gets too sunny and u guys are in line, he moves to where the sun is hitting u and kinda becomes an umbrella/wall so his back was now the one being hit by the sun

✶ tries his best to keep his hands off u and to not make u two like those couples hugging each other when in line for rides

✶ gets excited when he sees the mascots taking pics and begging you to take one with them

“please take one of me with the minion and i promise it will be my last… unless we see shrek.” he tells you as he held your hand in his while pouting a bit to convince you.

✶ takes pictures of you and all the parts of the park, not wanting to miss a part of it

✶ u two eat before the studio tour but he ends up napping with his head on your shoulder as the tour guide yapped and yapped (getting up early got to him)

✶ at waterworld, he chooses to sit first row which gets the both of you splashed by water

“i’m taking this as a sign to buy a shirt here now…”

✶ but when he sees the prices of the clothing pieces at universal, he curses himself out but still ends up getting u both matching shirts

✶ when someone recognizes him at the park and asks for a picture, he always immediately asks for ur permission if it was alright for u as he always separates his personal life from his work life

✶ holds your hand when you guys are in rides so he could “keep you safe” but he ends up being the one screaming and squeezing your hand during the ride

✶ takes loooootttsss of pictures of u, asking u to stand there and post and some were taken in secret

✶ in harry potter world, he speaks in a british accent when talking to anyone even to u and when he gets to the wand experience, he says all the spells completely wrong but still with a british accent

that’s all :P

✶ taglist — @cdbabymp3 @noturbabe22 @dabuggh3 @thatmartinkitten @tumb1rgir1z @mfcherry @ldrvinyl @certainfestivalnerdshepherd @seasidelily @jisyng @brucewayngfreal @beamuah @maybankfr @nickmillersn1gf @ivvees-blog @freak4hamzah @anonymousmay22 @beensleepy

LMK IF U WANNA BE ADDEDDD!!!

[bunnygirllover45]

Idk if anyone has asked about this before… buttttt what’s the lore abt one and magical girl,,, They were the first thing you posted on this blog I’m sure about it.

the magical girl is so lovely!

Yep haha, been posting abt them for a while. The lore is pretty simple, after all, they're OCs that I draw just for fun (and bc I love magical girls); Usami one day found this weird guy while rescuing some people in a shady van, saw the poor guy, and decided to bring him home, One doesn't remember abt himself and it's a little... weird, sometimes he acts like a dog (or a very angry cat, it depends on his mood.) And now the poor girl has to deal with her new... partner in crime?? mascot?? sidekick?? who worships her like a goddess.

and yeah, Usami is really lovely! I love my precious girl.

[eternal-kosmo-ghoul]

“even i’m not into that shit”

❤︎ synopsis — the sleep token members being fucking morons and fucking around

pairing: sleep token members x gn!reader (can be platonic or romantic)

theme: crack ✦

a/n: I’M BACK !!!! hopefully i don’t disappear for like a good fifty years after this. this is my third set of stupid ass headcanons. i pulled my shitty humor out of my ass for this one, enjoy !!! (the original ask got swallowed by my dumbass because i accidentally posted the unfinished fic 💀 this is dedicated to my bestie @dead-end-fanfiction)

cw: i think the title speaks for itself

▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆▆

➵ vessel

i just know this man is the most unhygienic motherfucker to ever exist

more specifically with his teeth. he cannot brush his teeth to save his life

like ??? this all powerful, dark deity, has the most stinky ass breath that if anyone dares to even breath it in, they’d disintegrate on the spot

like what the fuck vessel, you’re better than this

i love vessel but he just does weird shit sometimes

he sleeps butt ass naked

and one time you accidentally walked in on him while he was literally stripping to get ready for bed

he stood there like an npc while you were freaking out

“…. what’s wrong—“ “what’s wrong is that YOU’RE BUTT ASS NAKED IN FRONT OF ME—“

vessel is easily fascinated by human things. i mean - he was once human, so he likes to keep in touch every now and then.

however, out of all of the human things he had to have an obsession with.

… it was rubber ducks

this isn’t even explainable— how do you explain this all-powerful sleep entity to be obsessed with rubber ducks

he literally has a whole room dedicated to his collection of anything rubber duck related. give him a gift that has something to do with ducks and he’s making out with you on the spot

that’s not a joke, he did that with you before

➵ ii

this motherfucker is on his last limb and he’s being held together by paper clips

ii’s not even the leader but he cannot catch a break to save his life

he’s the only one that knows how to cook

one time he left ivy and the vesselettes in the kitchen by themselves. came back to house fires and high pitched screaming that definitely was not from the ladies

ii makes bomb ass banana cream pie though

ik for a fact this man does NOT keep his room clean

you once walked into his room to ask him a favor and there were like - a million drumsticks everywhere on the floor while he sat in the center of it

how does one possess that many drumsticks???

“dude what the f— clean your room!” “it gives me inner peace, y/n. go away.”

ii’s scared of the jollibee mascot

he once went out with his buddies to get some of that fast food. that giant red and yellow fuckass bee then came out of nowhere and spooked the shit out of ii

he then socked the guy in the face so hard the dude wearing the costume had a bloody nose

ii quickly fled the scene to not get arrested

after that he’s had a fear of fast food mascots in general, it’s kinda funny.

don’t bring ii near the jack in the box mascot though, he’s got some trauma from what he’s seen on twitter

➵ iii

zesty ahh mf

plays his bass like he’s fingering someone’s asshole like 🤨 whatcha doin’ iii ??

the type of man to set like fifty million alarms but never wakes up to any of them

however he wakes up everyone else in the process

it gets annoying hearing the “by the seaside” ringtone every morning at 6am. so one day you came into his room and poured ice cold water on him to wake him up

iii didn’t wake up from that btw, you thought it was dead

“…. bro wtf wake up—“

thankfully he wasn’t

biggest kpop stan

he’s a boy group stan and his favorite group is ateez

constantly blasting guerilla too

also i feel like iii owns a tumblr blog too

he’d be out here posting some shih like “pov you’re locked in a room w him for twenty four hours and you have to tickle his balls wyd” 💀

he probably posts also moodboards or some shi and tags them like an actual tumblr blogger

#it took my ahh fifty hours to make this plz repost it

stalks his fans on twitter

gets scared by said fans on twitter

“wdym they wanna get me pregnant”

breaks his bass every four hours during practice and vessel chews his ahh out every time

but it’s funny because you’re always there to help him

➵ ivy

he likes to act like he’s tough shit but ivy is a huge nerd

literally the definition of “magical in bed” except the magic is him explaining the gaming system of magic the gathering

hot asf but has no bitches frfr

also the definition of loser trapped in a hottie’s body

i’d like to believe that ivy has a crunchy ipad kid cough

and i mean CRUNCHY. bro will start choking on his saliva and start coughing like a dying seal

it’s quite hilarious, but also concerning at the same time

the first time you heard him cough like that, you were like 😟

“AEUGH- HEUGH— BEUHSHAK-“ “ivy—“

that pretty sums up the entire interaction

this bitch looks like he ate glue as a kid

more specifically glitter glue. the pink kind.

idk that sounds like ivy

he gets literal death coffee in the morning too btw

no ice. no sugar. straight shots of espresso.

eight shots, btw.

the coffee looks blacker than the black hole.

iii tried some of his coffee one time and spat it all in your face. ivy watched with his hell coffee in hand as you beat the shit out of iii

yeah, safe to say ivy was banned from having that kind of coffee for a while

so yeah. that pretty much sums up the kind of person ivy is

[letswrites]

(not) another ordinary night- L.N

Hello, everyone! This is one shot is based on this request by @babyoperatorclameagle-blog. Thank you for the request and I hope it meets your expectations!

Disclaimer: nsfw, it contains smut!!

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Lando looked at himself in the mirror. He looked good, of course, he knew that. He wore a white shirt not tucked into his black jeans. The 3 top buttons were open, leaving a part of his collarbones and chest visible. He smelled good, a manly scent, and his mascot watch was on his wrist, as usual. Still, he wasn’t really excited about going out. He knew exactly how the night would go. He would jump into his new McLaren, drive to a club in Monaco, a lot of flashlights would blind him temporarily, he would have some drinks, a few random girls would try to get a one night stand with him, and he would let one-or many- have this. But not because he cared about them, because of his own needs. And that night was one of those ordinary nights.

He was at famous cub in Monaco, sitting on a stuffed bench, holding his glass of gin, pretending he was listening to his friend while he stared at a group of girls. They were giggling among each other and looking at him every now and then. Typical. If felt choreographed. He didn’t actually care about them, just one girl in particular. She was not the most beautiful of the group but she had something different, she didn’t even think about glancing at him, not for a miserable second. She knew her friends were babbling about him, of course, she knew. He knew she knew. And even so, she remained focused on her drink.

It was the most intriguing thing ever. He couldn’t even remember the last time this happened to him. He loved. So he excused himself for his friend and walked toward the girls. They turned euphoric, naturally, except from that one specific girl. When he reached them, he smiled to all of the girls “Good night, ladies”, giggles and very shy ‘good nights’ showered on him “Are you having a good night?”, they nodded, some said yes or now is even better, but they weren’t his focus, his focus barely looked at him. “Excuse me, girls” he moved to her side and leaned on the bar counter “Hey…”, she looked at him “Hi” “I’m Lando, nice to meet you”, he offered his hand to her, she shook it “Nice to meet you, Lando” “Do you… have a boyfriend?”, she chuckled, bittersweet “No. Not anymore” “It was a recent break up?”, she nodded “What happened?”, she turned her drink down her throat, hoping it would burn till she forgot her ex “He cheated” “No!” “Yeah” “I don't think this is possible” “Well, it is” “What a jerk, huh?” “Totally” “I can’t believe a beautiful girl like you was cheated”, she blushed “Thanks…” “Would you…”, he leaned over her ear and whispered “...would you like to feel better?”, he stroked her hair, lightly “To feel good, feel desired again?” “W-what?” “I can make you feel all of these, and more”, she shivered with his breath against her neck “I-I… do you want to…?” “Yeah” “Well, why not?”, she shrugged “Are we leaving now?”, he nodded. She joined her belongings inside a minuscule bag and stood up from the bar stool “Bye, girls, don’t wait for me”. 

Lando held her hand and guided her to the back door, it was a deal with the club owner, so he could take his hooks up home without being caught by a camera. In his McLaren, she seemed numb. “Where are you taking me?” “My apartment” “Oh! This is a very nice car, by the way” “Thank you”, he looked at her “Can I ask you something?” “Sure” “Do you know who I am?” “Yeah. Lando Norris from F1. McLaren driver. Oscar Piastri’s teammate. You’re on the run for the title but Max Verstappen is very difficult to beat” “Wow! Are you a fan?” “I watch it sometimes” “And you weren’t interested in giggling and staring at me like your girlfriends?” “Why would I? You’re just a person” “Damn” “What?” “You’re driving me crazy” “Did you expect me to kiss your ass and venerate you?” “No! That’s exactly what I like about you” “Good”, and they kept silent for the rest of the ride.

At Lando’s place, he told her to sit on the couch while he grabbed something for them to drink. Usually he would you just jump for the fucking part, but he was tired of that species of ritual. So he promised her a glass of wine but all he got was Sprite and cranberry juice, so he just put them on a fancy glass and hoped none of them threw up with the combination. “Here” he offered her the glass “Thank you. You have a nice place” “Thanks”, he sat at her side “This… doesn’t seem to be wine” “It’s not. It’s sprite with cranberry juice” “Why?” “Is all I had” “Well, cheers, then” “Cheers”, they sipped it, making a disgusted face. “Please, don’t drink this anymore”, she laughed, almost gasping “This is so bad” “I’m sorry” “It’s ok. I think it is better we just get naked and end up with this soon” “You want to just end up with this?” “No! Let's just do it, alright?” “Ok”. He held her jaw, rubbing her face with his thumb and leaned to kiss her lips. She was a good kisser, it was a good point. Soon, their hands started to explore each other's bodies, and the kiss got deeper and deeper. She started to open the buttons of his shirt, and when she had access to his torso, she rubbed his chest up and down, feeling his skin, feeling his muscles. She moved to straddle him. She had an attitude, another good point. His hands moved to her hips, motivating her to move them on his lap.

But he didn’t have to, she was already grinding on him. He groaned against her lips, feeling himself bulging already. He pulled the strains of her dress down on her shoulders, freeing her tits “No bra, huh?” “Suck my nipples”, her energy switched, somehow, she was not the girl he wanted to rescue and take care of that he found on the bar anymore, she was a powerful woman, who knew what she wanted. And she wanted her nipples to be sucked “Your wish is my command”, he took her breast in his mouth, licking her nipples, making circles with his tongue, biting it lightly. She whined while she continued to dry hump his hard cock “Yes”. While Lando was enjoying his time sucking her nipples, she was impatient already, so she opened his jeans and slipped a hand inside his boxers, palming his hard dick. He groaned again “Fuck” “Take those off so I can do my job”, he smirked, lifting his hips and stripping down his pants and boxers. She didn’t wait much after he was done with it, taking his cock in one hand and starting to stroke it, rubbing his tip with her thumb from time to time, he was going crazy, she had him literally on the palm of her hand, and he knew he wasn’t going to last longer.

“W-what are you doing?” “You don’t like it?”, she squeezed his member, lighty, and Lando could feel his precum dripping down already “Fuck… I like it…a lot” she squeezed it again with a mischievous look on her face “Would you like it better if I put it in my mouth?”, just the thought of having her mouth around his cock just made him even more horny “Yes. Yes, I woul…” but he didn’t have a chance to finish his sentence, he cummed already. Damn, it was so embarrassing. She noticed, of course, and she was about to look down but he didn’t let her, he just kissed her, desperate, what would he do now? She pulled away “Did you just…” “I’m sorry, I… I’ll get hard again quick, just… hold on”, she smirked, he was so cute, where did all that confidence he held on the club went? “Let me help you”. She stood from his lap and fully undressed herself, slowly, letting her hands rub her own skin while she took her clothes off, just to tease him. “Is it helping?”, he started to stroke himself even though the overstimulation hurt. He didn't care, he had to have her around him. “Fuck… yes”, he threw his head back, stroking harder while imagined her on top of him, doing all of those things her hips were doing over their clothes. She smirked, then walked towards him and sat on his lap again, leaning down to kiss his neck. “Stop stroking, just focus on me”, she whispered “Ok” “Just hold my hips so I won’t fall”, he obeyed. She started touching her tits with one hand and stimulating her clit with the other, she moaned, then started fingering herself.

“God… Lando, I fucking need you”, she pleaded, he already was hard again. How couldn’t he be after watching her touching herself right in front of him? With one hand he lifted her ass and with the other he aligned himself with her and with no mercy he penetrated her, they both moaned, Lando rolled his eyes, but he tried not to, he wanted to focus on her, he wanted to see every move, every expression of her. She started to ride his dick “You’re so pretty, damn… oh my god.” she moved on top of him, changing the angle of her grinding, giving them both more pleasure that they could have taken. “Yes, yes, yes…” “Fuck, Lando… I’m close”, Thank God, he thought, he didn’t think he could wait much more. “I want you to cum inside of me” “What?!” “I’m on the pill, go ahead” usually he wouldn't do that, but she seemed very honest in the car so he decided to do it. A few more thrusts and he cummed, filling inside of her with his fluids. She cummed a few moments after still riding his half soften, half hard member. “Damn” he cursed, that was not another ordinary night.

[judesmoonbeauty]

Love Begins From a Mean Lie: Victor Collection Event Story

Fan translation only. Not 100% accurate. Please expect grammatical errors. Cybird owns everything. Feel free to re-blog, but please do NOT post my translations elsewhere. What I obtain is what will be translated. Translation notes are marked with *** Dividers: @/natimiles

It was one day when I went to submit a report to Victor........

Victor: This is a grave situation!

Victor looked through the documents and let out a curt voice.

Kate: Huh, is there something wrong...?

Victor: No Kate, your work is perfect as usual! It’s just……

Victor: WILIAROGJUDROGALELHARIWILJUDELL!

(Uh, is that some kind of spell…?)

Victor: ....This is the order of the cursed people you wrote in your most recent report.

Victor: Do you notice anything?

Kate: Notice?

Victor: I’m not in it!

Kate: Ah, that's true.

Victor often has a busy schedule as the Queen's aide…….

He can't put in as many Crown assignments as the others.

Besides, I had not written a report on Victor recently, as I was accompanying the others on missions.

Victor: ……. Actually, Her Majesty the Queen told me that she didn't have enough information about me.

Victor: So, Kate! Will you write about me with your own hand?

Kate: I'll leave it to me, that's what I do!

Kate: But ..... Is there any mission that you can participate in from now on, Victor?

Victor: That's the thing. Crown assignments are allocated based on everyone's abilities.

Victor: Adding me after the fact would please everyone, but I can't deny that it will detract from the mission.

Victor: Besides, even though Her Majesty the Queen wants the information, the Queen's aide's job is not going away.

Kate: As usual, you've been busy……

Victor: …..Yes! How about you interview me?

Victor: I'm sure Her Majesty will be pleased if you put it all together and give it to her.

Kate: An interview....... Okay, I will! I look forward to working with you.

…….Thus began the interview to write down Victor's information.

Victor: My name is Victor. I am a the Queen's aide and a member of the Crown!

Victor: Height 183.5cm! Birthday is February 20th!

Victor: If you deliver any presents to Crown Castle, I'll be grateful for them!

Victor: Charming points? There are many, but if I had to choose just one, it would be the mole on my mouth.

Victor: This is also one of the "Seven Wonders of Vic," where if you press it, the left and right sides will be switched the next day!

Victor: I’m a cheerful person, who loves everyone at Crown and is loved by everyone at Crown. (👀??? That last bit is news to me.)

Victor: ……Come to think of it, we were talking about how Crown doesn't have a mascot.

Victor: I guess you could say I'm the mascot!

Victor began speaking without pause, and I took notes earnestly so as not to miss a single word.

(…..Hmmm. There's a lot of subjectivity in Victor's work, so we'll have to separate that properly.)

(Any other questions…….)

Kate: Victor……when do you usually sleep? I feel like you’re always awake.….

On sleepless nights, I wander into the kitchen and find Victor busy making sweets.

Early in the morning, I woke up for some reason and was taking a walk in the garden, and I saw Victor watering the flowers……

Victor was always there when I noticed it, so I wondered when he slept….. 

Victor: I'm just like everyone else. Sleep at night and get up in the morning! That's the secret to good health!

Kate: That’s right. When we met in the morning, you didn’t even have bedhead, so I thought you weren’t sleeping.

Victor: No way! I'm a normal human being. I need my sleep.

Victor: I have naturally good hair, but I don't miss taking care of it every night, so it's hard for me to have bedhead.

Victor: But, it’s not like I don’t sleep at all alright? If you don’t mind, why don’t you come wake me up?

Kate: Eh…..

Victor: If I could see your face when I woke up,…….I would be so happy that day.

Kate: …..Ah, I’ll think about it.

Victor: Hehe, you’re always welcome!

Watching someone wake up makes me feel like I'm trespassing on their private life, which makes me feel a bit uneasy…..

(The only people who are allowed to see that kind of thing are the people who are really close to you.)

(….. I wonder if even the always energetic Victor is a bit languid when he wakes up from sleep.)

Even though I refused, I couldn't help but imagine Victor waking up.

(....should not. I need to concentrate on the interview! Next question is....)

Kate: Recently, have you done anything bad Victor?

Victor: Hehe...there's always evil in Crown! Good question.

Victor: Bad things…….I guess so. I lied to an innocent child for my own personal greed.

Victor: As an apology, I'm going to prepare a delicious royal cake for the child! That’s usual news.

Kate: Victor is preparing a cake to apologize! That’s new.

Victor: Of course, it depends on the degree of lying....... By the way Kate, what kind of cake do you like?

Kate: I’m torn...... I like anything with chocolate, and strawberry shortcake too....

Kate: Oh, and items made with seasonal fruits are also hard to give up.

Kate: .... But I'm not being lied to by you now Victor, am I?

Victor: …..Do you believe so? Maybe without you even realizing it, I could be telling a terrible lie.

Kate: Then let's go to a cake shop together.

Kate: I have a lot of questions and choices to make, so please bear with me.

Victor: Hehe……You're so cute and confused, I might just buy the whole store.

(Victor would really buy everything …..)

Victor: Now, what's the next question?

Kate: Next, yes….

Kate: Victor is full of himself and cheerful……

Kate: You don’t seem to have anything to be afraid of, but is there anything?

Victor: Afraid of…..huh.

Victor: ……Everyone at Crown.

Kate: Oh, maybe that’s why you’re “afraid of cake”? ***

Victor: "Afraid of cake"?

Kate: By telling people that you’re scared of what you like……

Kate: It's an oriental story where….. you can get what you like from someone who scared you.

Kate: Victor, I think you intentionally said you were scared because you love everyone in the Crown.

Victor: Hehe, that’s an interesting story.

Victor: It's true that I cherish and love everyone at Crown……but what I just said is true.

Victor: If the Crown follows its path to the end and conquers evil with evil…..

Victor: ……Someday I will be judged by them.

Kate: What…..?

Victor: …..I think there is such a possibility.

I didn't think Victor had any crimes that would warrant being judged by the Crown…..

I don't know everything about him, so I couldn't deny it.

Kate: Because you're afraid of being judged... Are you afraid of Crown?

(Like God announcing death, the Crown announces destruction to evil.)

(Victor may also fear Crown as a symbol of his own destruction.…)

Victor: ….It’s a little different.

Victor: If I'm guilty, I think I deserve to be judged. There’s no fear there.

Victor: Just…

Victor: I'm so happy now that I'm spending time with everyone...I'm sad and scared that it will end someday.

(Victor isn't afraid of being punished...he's sad that his days are coming to an end.)

(In that case….)

Kate: …. I don't know what crime you’re guilty of Victor.

Kate: That sin, if it can be atoned for in some way….I don’t know.

Victor: ….Yeah.

Kate: But ……I, too, want these days to continue!

Kate: So if I can help, please give me a shout.

Kate: I will always help you Victor, just as you always do!

Before I knew it, I told Victor that I wanted to help him, and he smiled kindly at me.

Victor: …..Thank you, Kate.

-Then I asked many other questions and finished the interview with Victor.

Kate: Hmmm ........ I wrote a lot, but….

Kate: Does Her Majesty the Queen really want this information .....?

There are some parts where Victor's way of thinking and personality are well written.

Even if Her Majesty the Queen were to read it, it would contain information that would be neither harmful nor helpful.

Victor: Of course, I’m very happy! I'll be sure to give it to Her Majesty the Queen later!

Victor's jewel-like eyes sparkled as he picked up my report and smiled.

Victor: ……Thank you for writing about me, Kate.

When I returned to Crown Castle after the interview, I met William.

In the color of the setting sun shining into the hall, his red eyes that never lose their edge find me, and they flicker happily.

William: …. It seems it took quite a while to submit the report today.

William: Did you have afternoon tea with Victor?

Kate: No, it seems that Her Majesty the Queen actually wanted information about Victor…..

Kate: I interviewed Victor and compiled it into a report.

William: Hmm? …..that’s an odd story.

Kate: What…?

William: Her Majesty the Queen knows Victor better than anyone. She wouldn’t say she doesn’t have enough information.

Kate: What…? Does that mean Victor lied? Why?

William: Regarding Victor's lie this time...Is there anything that concerns you?

Kate: Concerned about…..

FLASHBACK

Victor: ….. Thank you for writing about me, Kate.

What left a particularly strong impression on me was the happy look on Victor's face when he saw my report after the interview.

FLASHBACK ENDS

(Could it be….)

Kate: Victor lied…..

Kate: …..Because he wanted me to write about himself?

William didn't confirm or deny my guess, and smiled leisurely.

William: …..Our work must not be known to others.

William: Only those who walk under the light are etched into Britain's glorious history.

William: There's no need to complain about it. But….

William: Sometimes you may wish to carve it with your own hands and leave it behind.

William: -As Britain flourishes and shines brightly, there is a dark shadow that falls over it.

(Victor wants me to write it down…..?)

(….If so, he’d be happy.)

As a fairytale keeper, I can record Victor's steps and make him happy.

Thinking like that, I became even more motivated.

(Besides, I would like to continue to write about it.)

(…If I do that, I'm sure I'll be able to get closer to Victor.)

***Just a note about the "afraid of cake" scene and being linked to a story or tale in the East. I couldn't find anything myself and I'm 100% sure I translated this scene inaccurately. So, take it with a grain of salt.

[Master Lists]

[shiftythrifting]

I've never submitted to a blog before so I hope I'm doing this right

I give you this Sergei (one of the meerkat mascots of compare the market - an insurance comparison site in the UK)

He doesn't look special but he has a backstory...

There's a character in our D&D campaign named Sergei who is currently missing, I saw this guy in a charity shop in May and sent a picture to the group chat saying "guys I found him, he's here he's fine"

I have since been back to that charity shop at least 3 times and HE IS STILL THERE!!! This image was taken at the start of September, they've pushed him to the back of the other teddies now. It makes me so so sad every time I see him, I almost brought him the last time I was there but I know I don't have space for him.

If next time I go back to that charity shop he is still there, I think I have to bring him home

it is destiny if you meet again

[pokepollsters]

Introducing: PokéPollsters' Weekly Little Cup Polls!

I've been wanting to broaden the horizons of this blog for a little while now, and alongside my planned playthrough-by-post, I'd like to introduce this new series of polls beginning in the new year!

Running alongside our regular tournaments, we'll have one poll a week, asking a simple Pokémon related question. Usually a yes or no, or an either/or, or at most a handful of answers. Now we can find out the consensus on all your burning questions, like:

Do you prefer a 2d or 3d art style?

Is Pikachu a good mascot Pokémon?

Will the Generation 10 games include voice acting?

Or we can even help Professor Oak with the question he's never quite figured out:

Are you a boy, or a girl?

(Though that one may require some more nuanced answers, buddy!)

And best of all, since this blog is nothing without the followers, the submission box will be open for any questions you want an answer to!

Simply submit your question with a poll, making sure it's set to a week- as I'm still not certain how much I can edit submissions- and it'll be added to the queue! This is subject to my vetting, so keep in mind:

It must be a simple question, either yes or no, pick one or the other, or at most 11 options. (One space in the poll must be kept for a 'See Results' option!)

It must be Pokémon related, though it can be to do with any part of the franchise.

And nothing mean-spirited- we don't judge others for having different tastes in Pokémon, characters, games, or whatever else the question may be about.

Otherwise, be as creative as you like!

Polls will run from Sunday to Sunday, giving you all week to determine an outcome. The first poll will be up Sunday 5th January, and I'd like to do monthly round ups at the end of each month where I make note of that month's outcomes!

So I hope you're all excited for something new on here, and the submission box is waiting for you! In the meantime, please keep supporting and voting on the regular tournaments, your enthusiasm means everything to me. Thank you so much everyone!