#He laughs at her so so much. So often. They are united in haterism like ‘thank god we’re normal’ and then realize they are so obnoxious

[fumifooms]

thanks for infecting me with marchil its so so fun to just see them pair themselves up in the background now

especially love how much she picks him up like a cat (and when he has the opportunity to do it to her too he just lugs her around like a sack of oats) gosh i love them they're so funny

YAAAAAA 🎉🎉 I’m so glad to hear it welcome to the sillies corner 🤝

THEY’RE SOOO SO FUNNY

They’re worsties that cannot get enough of each other

[shallitickleyournerdbutton]

After the heartache of the Volume 8 finale, I would like to return to a happier point in the show and suggest some memes/jokes that I like to think the students at Beacon would have had. More closely inline with the RWBY Chibi-verse, than the actual show - where Nothing Bad Ever Happened.

"Who's child is this?" being used to refer to Ruby - the youngest student at Beacon - when she's left unsupervised and/or doing something odd.

"I'd let Glynda punish/whip me for one corn chip."

Every now and again "Missing - Have you seen this person?" posters for Professor Peach will pop up around campus. No one knows who it is that keeps making them.

Vomit Boy candids being taken and shared any time Jaune is Suffering™️ on some form of transport.

The Great One plush of Pyrrha exists in-universe... and becomes the go-to prize for any stupid competition between the students. There's at least a dozen of these dolls on campus now, owned by various people and won as "spoils of war."

There's a dedicated chalkboard in the combat room for tallying how many times Nora has launched someone into the stratosphere. Notable mentions are listed on the board alongside her of other people who have achieved this feat - including Yang, Yatsuhashi, and Glynda.

(She launched both Port and Oobleck one day when they kept annoying her. Sometimes, their screams can still be heard if you listen closely enough.)

"There's that old guy again..." "Oh, shopkeep? Yea, he's everywhere. Don't think too much about it."

This leads to "Don't think too much about it." becoming something of a slogan for every time anything unusual happens.

"Candy canes, kids! One for Sun Wukong, one for Yang Xiao-Long, ooh four for Coco Adel, you go Coco!"

"I--"

"Andnoneforweissschneebye~"

Team STRQ having something akin to legend status at Beacon, whispered in hushed voices for fear and reverence of their names. There's a war between the students regarding team JNPR as their successors vs. the students who insist JNPR are not anywhere near worthy of such a title.

"How many team CRDLs does it take to beat Pyrrha?"

Blurry fancam-style videos of the Qrow vs. Winter fight out in the courtyard being traded around like baseball cards with other students. Some try and manufacture a "rematch" of this with the materials they've got - trying to get Ruby and Weiss to fight each other. 

That weird sing-song "HellOooOo~" that Yang sometimes does being mimicked by everyone. And I mean everyone.

Any time there's a significant lull in conversations or classes, someone often asks "Why are we here?" which never fails to make everyone in the vicinity groan.

"Ozpin is compensating for something" jokes about his office chair - including at least one popular response being "it's the war crimes", without them knowing just how accurate they actually are.

"On a scale of Ren-Nora, how excited do you want me to be?"

"Ladies Love Lavender" referring to Lisa Lavender having her own in-universe fandom mostly comprised of women. (Lavender being associated with lesbians irl, and I just think this would be funny.)

The sight of Ren just picking up and carrying Nora away from something is so commonplace that other people start doing it to their friends when they Need To Stop.

"Why is Blake's bow so big?" "Because it's full of secrets."

Blake being a closet faunus being such a poorly hidden secret that by the time she finally takes off the bow no one actually even notices. 

The betting pool surrounding exactly what it is in Ozpin's cup - coffee being one of the least popular options, and souls being the top choice.

Using Yatsuhasi as a unit of measurement. 

Photoshopping adorable images of Velvet onto various "cute" animal memes.

Everyone wanting to be spanked by Coco Adel. 

"I'd let Fox blow me up too."

"Why is Weiss' hair so long?" "To reflect the length of her father's crimes."

Everyone mimicking Pyrrha's memetic "I'm sorry!" anytime they apologise for anything. Even going as far to do it while apologising to things that don't require apologies - like inanimate objects.

"Are Port and Oobleck, you know... 💅?"

In fact, just that 💅 being used to refer to a large number of people at Beacon. Actual LGBT students picking this up and using it towards grimm when they're attacked to question the sexuality/homophobia of the grimm targeting them over their peers.

Threatening Neptune with water anytime he flirts with a girl who is clearly Not Interested in him.

No one knowing who, exactly, the other two members of team SSSN are - with wild theories abounding about who they may be. Popular choices include Shopkeep, Zwei, and Professor Peach.

This persists even after their tournament fights where they're shown. Scarlet and Sage are perfectly content with this, and participate.

"Arslan's/Pyrrha's back must be aching from constantly carrying her entire team."

And the respective responses of, "Reese/Nora are alright."

Similar jokes about Glynda also carrying the entire faculty/academy on her back.

"Salutations!"

The war between the "Irondaddy" fanbase, and his haters - who refer to him with various derogatory versions of his name. "Metalpenis", "Coppercock", "Chromeshaft", etc.

Anytime someone is doing something ~questionable~ donning a pair of glasses and/or imitating Oz or Oobleck pushing them back up their nose with accompanying menacing body language. (Kubrick Stare optional.)

Mercury having a foot fetish, courtesy of the people who caught him sniffing shoes at the festival.

"Did <character> just die?" "You know, it was really unclear." any time someone takes some insane damage in a fight and isn't seen for some time afterwards.

Everyone trying to locate and get a pic of the ~mysterious~ fourth member of team CMSN, who has only ever been spotted once - her tournament fight in the first round. Beacon's version of "Where's Wally?"

The Sympathy Fund for Emerald and her one-sided crush on Cinder. "She could honestly do so much better."

People offering themselves up as tribute to spar with Pyrrha/Yang/Coco/Sun just so they can be beaten up by the hottest people on campus.

"I drink milk!" being used as a defensive argument in wildly inappropriate contexts.

Naming grimm really boring names and attempting to keep them as pets. 

The innumerous times Port has allowed a "zoo-break" to happen under his watch and everyone having to assist in recovering his prized subjects.

"Where the fuck are all the fourth years?" "Ozpin's soul collection."

Candid shots of Glynda Suffering™️ being shared similarly to the ones of Vomit Boy.

Ranking people based on their Patience Levels - Pyrrha, Ren, Glynda, Emerald, and Fox being frequent top markers based on the bullshit they put up with from their respective teams.

"Saint Pyrrha" being a common nickname for her, and her neverending niceness towards people who absolutely do not not deserve it.

Weiss' "Hey!" being replicated amongst the student body and slowly growing more and more high-pitched in its replication until it eventually just becomes a shrill noise. Even so, everyone still knows what it means - and Weiss is absolutely unamused by all of this.

In fact, a lot of early!Weiss' comments being mercilessly mocked by everyone - "I'm a victim!" being one of them.

Renowned fear permitting amongst the student body regarding Yang's red eyes meaning Serious Business. Morphs into references of "going full Yang" to mean having rage-fuelled temper tantrums.

"Never miss a beat, never miss a beat" becoming a mantra for focusing on a task. This inspires several remixes of Neon saying it, and again with no one knowing who it is making them.

By all means, feel free to add any more that you all think of! I could use a laugh!

Also, check the notes for additions!

[theysayitscrazy]

Doctor’s Orders || Chapter Ten

MASTER LIST // AO3 // FFN

In the three weeks since Clay had been home, his gunshot wounds had healed smoothly, and he’d started physical therapy twice a week at a place down the street from the house. When he wasn’t doing that, Kara had him doing stretches and exercises around the house to help loosen any stiffness he might have gained from the strenuous physical therapy.

Clay didn’t even mind the extra work she had him putting in. He was simply happy to be spending so much time with her. He had another week before she cleared him for duty officially, so they were taking advantage of all the time they could get. Their friends and family had scaled back their visits to give them sometimes to themselves after they had disappeared one to many times while visitors were over.

Especially after the incident when Jason and Metal walked in on them out on the pool deck. Kara had been naked and riding him in a lounge chair. Her glorious breasts bouncing and on view for all to see. They hadn’t known it at the time though. They’d both been too wrapped up in each other, but when Metal refused to meet Kara’s eyes that evening and Jason was walking with a slight limp from a sprained ankle, the whole sordid story came out.

Apparently, they had tripped over each other as they scrambled away from the scene. Metal claimed his eyes were scarred for life and Jason mentioned emotional and physical trauma. Kara had laughed her ass off and pressed a kiss to Clay’s cheek, not embarrassed in the slightest.

When Sonny had bitched and moaned about Goldilocks disappearing upstairs with the green-eyed demon one too many times, Clay had kindly told his friend, “I will fuck my wife whenever I damned well, please, and you can stay and listen, or you can go home.”

Kara had snapped at him for being a dick, but had also added with a smirk, “I don’t mind if you boys listen as my sexy man fucks me good.”

It had earned her a roomful of groans, but Clay could see the level of respect go up in Sonny’s eyes. Clay felt good knowing his wife felt comfortable joking around with his team. Especially since she was already so close with two other SEAL teams, he wanted her to mesh well with his own unit.

It had been a hard first six months on Bravo without her knowing them. Things hadn’t started off the best with Jason’s grudge against his father, but they’d quickly gotten over that. When he told Jason he was married already, he’d been a little confused. Him and the rest of the team saw him as a kid still. Twenty-seven and still wet behind the ears. It didn’t matter that he’d led his own missions on Team 3, or that he already filled in as 2B9 on Bravo in his first six months.

They only saw what they wanted to see.

So, he only showed him pieces of his life. They didn’t ask too many questions, and he didn’t over share. It was hard to open up to a group of guys already set in their ways and had been a team for years before he joined up. Their rookie, they called him. He often rolled his eyes at them. If they’d only known half the shit, he’d already done in his twenty-seven years.

Kara was of the opinion that it did matter. “If they want to see a twenty-seven-year-old kid that’s wet behind the ears, that’s on them, baby. It’s their loss. You have so much going for you; you don’t need their approval.” She had seen the look on his face, so she continued. “All you can do is prove it. Yes, I don’t think you should have to prove shit to anyone, but you are the new guy. They don’t trust you yet either. It’ll take time. So just do your job and use that sexy as hell brain of yours to wow them to bits, like you do me.”

Clay had to smile at the memory. The conversation had led to them in bed, as most conversations did when she got passionate about something. It was one of the first things he loved most about her. Her passion. She was a strong and intelligent woman with a passion to take on the world, and an attitude to not give a fuck when people didn’t like her. She had her haters for it, but she never once let anyone stand in her way for something she cared about.

He found himself staring at her from across the room. She was wearing a red tank top that hugged her curves and really brought out the colors of the hibiscus and lilies tattooed on her arms. The reds and pinks standing out against the black ink. The black skirt she wore was another gauzy thing that hugged her waist and flowed around her like water. She had a leather braided headband situated on her head with handpicked flowers from the yard braided into the leather band. She was barefoot and smiling as she joked with Trish in the kitchen.

She looked like a bohemian goddess as the sun lit up her face. Absolutely fucking beautiful.

He was sitting in the living room area of their large great room, hanging with Bravo and Alpha. It was their official housewarming party. Everyone they knew, and their families were everywhere throughout the large house and backyard. SEAL teams, hospital staff and Bravo support staff were scattered about the large home.

“Yo lover boy, you zone out over there?” Sonny drawled from across the living room.

Clay looked away from staring at Kara bustling around in the kitchen and rolled his eyes at his buddy. “You need something?” he asked.

Sonny chuckled and shook his head as Jameelah ran by.

“Nah brother, just making sure you weren’t daydreaming’ about sneakin off with the green-eyed demon,” Sonny grinned.

Clay laughed, “Well, I was,” he grinned.

“Aren’t you supposed to recovering from gunshot wounds?” Hawk laughed.

Clay grinned at his brother, ��What can I say? I’m only doing what the doctor ordered.”

Kara walked over then as Trish headed outside with Jameelah following. “And what did the doctor order?” Kara asked with a coy smile on her lips.

Clay pulled her down into his lap with a grin. “Nothing but rest and relaxation,” he answered.

She grinned and pressed a kiss to his lips, “I’d say I’ve been taking pretty good care of you lately,” she smirked and glanced at the group as they all broke out into loud groans.

Her and Clay started cracking up.

“I can’t wait till you two go back to normal,” Metal groaned and rolled his eyes.

Kara grinned brightly at him. “Bullshit. You’ve been bitching about my hours for months. And I quote, ‘you’re crabby, you need to get laid.’”

Metal smirked and shrugged. “Well can it be done now? Like fucking shit, walking in on it is getting old,” he grumbled.

Kara barked out a laugh. “I mean, you could call first.”

“Why would I do that?” Metal asked, looking confused.

~*~

Jason laughed at Metal’s confusion. “I mean, we could. We probably should,” he amended with a shrug.

Kara rolled her eyes at him, and Jason only grinned at her. In the last three weeks since they’ve gotten to know Kara, she’d quickly grown relaxed around him and Bravo. Whatever hesitation she first had with him was long gone. He still hadn’t had a chance to talk to her about it, and he wanted to, but it had never been the right time.

They were all laughing and joking around in the living, just Bravo and Alpha team together. Their wives and families and Kara’s hospital friends were outside. Whiskey team had been spun up the day before and weren’t back yet.

Jason was thoroughly enjoying himself when there was a knock at the door. While everyone went on laughing and ignoring it, Jason wondered who it could be. Everyone was that was coming seemed have been there for hours already, and everyone had walked in without knocking.

Derrick was closest to the door. He stood up and answered it. When he froze slightly, Jason got curious. Derrick quickly moved out of the way. Lieutenant Commander Blackburn entered first, in full camo uniform. Behind him was Lieutenant Commander Rockwell, CO of Alpha Team was also in full uniform. They stepped inside and gave a glance to the men in the room as two others entered the house.

Admiral Pike, a decorated five-star Admiral and currently the most ranking officer within Navy, entered in a crisp white uniform. Tall and broad shouldered, the man had salt and pepper hair and steely gray eyes. In his sixties, he was still hard muscles and thin built. He was still an intimidating and imposing man with a reputation of being a hard ass.

All the men in the room immediately sprang to their feet and stood at salute. “At ease gentleman,” Admiral Pike nodded briskly.

Jason glanced at Kara to see her on her feet. She had to get up to let Clay rise and salute the Admiral, but even though she was no longer in the Navy, she had still shown respect and saluted the man. She didn’t look all that pleased though.

“You know,” she drawled, causing several eyes in the room to spring her way. “When I invited you to my housewarming party, I was expecting John and Linda, not Admiral Pike and Deputy Director Higgins,” she took raised an eyebrow at the men as she took a sip of her whiskey neat.

Eyebrows around the room raised at Kara’s bold statement.

“Apologies Lieutenant, I’m afraid this isn’t a social call.” Admiral Pike shifted on his feet under her penetrating gaze. “And it’s Director now,” Pike nodded at the tall dark hair man standing next to him. While tall and dark haired, he was otherwise unremarkable. No distinguishing features, maybe slightly handsome, but not quite. Dark eyes, average face. He was an average looking man.

“Oh, my apologies, Director,” she put emphasis on the title, “And congratulations,” she raised her glass to him.

Jason narrowed his eyes on her. It was almost like she was mocking the guy. And who exactly was he? Director for what department or organization?

The Director gave a bit of a smirk, “Kara,” he greeted.

“Karl,” Kara responded, an odd look in her eye.

That’s when it clicked for Jason. Karl Higgins. Director of the C.I.A. Jason’s eyes shot across the room to Ray. He had already put two and two together and was watching Kara with narrowed eyes.

“Perhaps we could speak in private?” Admiral Pike suggested.

“My office is just through there,” she nodded at door just to right of the stairs to the second floor.

Admiral Pike led the way, and Director Higgins followed. Kara squeezed Clay’s hand before she let go, squared her shoulders, and followed the men into her office.

Clay followed her, but stopped in front of Blackburn, just outside the office door as it closed behind Kara. He watched the door close before he turned to his CO. “Eric, what’s going on?” Clay demanded.

Blackburn held up a hand and motioned for everyone to stay calm. “We can’t go into too much detail right now, but there’s a mission coming down the pipeline. Bravo and Alpha are going to deploy together, but it’s still a couple a week’s away.”

“And my wife?” Clay demanded, speaking to Blackburn in a way that Jason had never heard from the Petty Officer before.

“Is in negotiations with both an Admiral and the Director of C.I.A,” Blackburn answered, his voice even and calm, even though Clay wasn’t. “What does that tell you?”

Jason shifted on his feet. He didn’t like this one bit. Clay’s shoulders were tense. “She left the Navy,” Clay argued.

The office door opened, and Director Higgins glanced out. “Spenser,” he motioned to him.

Clay didn’t have to be asked twice, he immediately walked into the office and closed the door behind him.

Jason immediately walked over to Blackburn, “Eric, come on. You can’t give us anything more?”

Eric sighed and said, “If Kara agrees, she’ll be reinstated in the Navy and will deploy with Bravo and Alpha.” He glanced around the room as he said it.

Jason glanced at Metal to see him close his eyes and tilt his head back in silent disbelief. He clearly knew how badly this was going to wreck her.

“I’m sorry I can’t tell you more, until we know more, and you’re officially read in,” Blackburn sighed.

~*~

Clay walked into the office and quickly closed the door behind him. He found Kara leaning against her desk in the back of the room, facing the Admiral and Director, who sat in armchairs in the center of the large room.

Their office had been set up for business purposes. They entertained clients here for their Cyber Security firm. There were bookcases lining two walls and both Kara and he had their own desks. They were side by side, but apart and facing the door that led out into the Great Room.

He wanted to go straight to Kara and ignore the Admiral and Director completely. But he was an enlisted Petty Officer, and he couldn’t do that. So, he stood at attention at the door, his arms stiff at his sides and he stared ahead. He chose Kara as his focus point.

He could read her like and open book. Her stiff posture, the stone-cold mask over her face. She was scared and pissed off.

“At ease, Clay,” Admiral Pike greeted informally.

Clay immediately walked across the room and went to Kara. He stopped before her, and she looked up at him. She shook her head slightly, indicating it wasn’t the time, so he took up residence beside her. He propped a hip up on her desk and faced the two men that had the nerve to bring business to Family Time.

“Clay,” Admiral Pike greeted informally.

“What’s all this about, Sir?” Clay asked, a little annoyed at this point.

“We’re here to ask Kara to rejoin the Navy,” Pike started.

Clay’s eyes shot to Kara. She gave him a look that meant they’d talk about it later.

“It would be temporary. She’d be re-enlisted with her same rank, plus with the added hours of her fellowship, she’d be promoted and commissioned as Captain, an O6 officer. You’d keep the title and benefits afterwards, of course,” Pike explained, glancing at Kara. “And the Navy will match your fellowship hours for the duration of the deployment. You’d be done with your Fellowship afterwards.”

“What’s the mission?” Clay asked, ignoring her potential promotion and all their hopes and dreams handed to them on a silver platter. If the Navy was bending over backwards for her, it had to be for a reason.

“Africa,” Kara said evenly, she didn’t meet his eyes as she pushed off the desk and walked over to sideboard under a window that faced the backyard. She set her glass down and poured herself another three fingers of her favorite single malt.

Clay watched her for a moment, knowing damn well how badly this was breaking her. She stared out the window, glass in hand and lost in her own thoughts. Clay turned back to the two men that had come into his home and turned his life upside down.

“Why?” he asked, trying to wrap his head around it. For as smart as he was, he was failing in the moment. Failing his wife.

“Because you and Kara have firsthand knowledge of the enemy. You’ve faced him before,” Director Higgins stated.

Clay tensed. “Shien Abubakar,” he stated. His eyes darted back to his wife. She was tense, knuckles white on her glass of single malt.

“Why now?” Clay asked. “We went after him before, we never got him.”

“He surfaced again, and with some new evidence we can narrow in on him,” Higgins explained.

Clay narrowed his eyes, “What new evidence?”

Higgins blanched; he wasn’t expecting to have to explain this, then. Clay shot his gaze to Admiral Pike, but Pike’s eyes were on Kara. Clay turned to Kara and waited. “The ballistics report came back from the bullets I dug out of your body. Captain Linstrott was kind enough to send me a copy of the report,” she explained and turned to face him. “I had a hunch, so I forwarded the report to Karl,” she nodded at Higgins. “Turns out, I was right,” her voice cracked, and tears lined her eyes.

Clay heard all he needed to. “It was a hit,” he concluded.

Kara nodded and blinked away the unshed tears. “The restaurant, the hospital. It was a coordinated hit to take us both out at the same time.” Her voice was steady as she met his gaze.

His jaw popped as he ground molars. His knuckles cracked when he clenched his fists. He went to her and pulled her into his arms. He needed to hold her. She wrapped an arm around him with the hand not holding her glass and rested her forehead against his chest. He cradled her head against him with one hand and wrapped the other around her waist. “Clay,” she barely breathed a whisper of his name, against his chest, so only he could hear, as her fingers clenched the back of shirt. Her fingernails dug into his skin, and he knew then, just how absolutely wrecked she was.

His heart broke for her. For him. For them and all their plans for their lives.

He had to make this right.

“What’s the plan?” he asked. He geared himself up and snapped himself out of the shock he was feeling. Kara needed him on his game. He could do this. They’ve done it before.

Kara pulled away and looked up at him. He glanced down at her and nodded. She needed him strong, he’d give her that. She nodded back and squared her shoulders. She’d be strong too. They could do this.

“The plan is,” Admiral Pike started. “Bravo and Alpha with deploy together for a joint operation. Bravo will take point, and Alpha will provide back up. Kara will deploy with Bravo, and act in the same capacity as team doctor, as she did while assigned to Alpha Team. Deployment is two months, could go longer.”

Kara pulled away from Clay and set down her whiskey glass. She went back to the front of her desk and leaned back against it and crossed her arms. “I’m not staying on a ship,” she stated firmly.

Admiral Pike actually chuckled. “I wouldn’t expect you to.”

“I’ll have concessions,” Kara stated.

“I’d expect nothing less from you,” Pike grinned. “Let’s hear them.”

“I pick my team. No one is on my team without my say so,” she stated evenly.

Clay fought back a smirk. Here was his girl. His fierce and fiery wife. Arms crossed and making demands to an Admiral.

“I figured as much,” Pike nodded. “Hawkins?”

Kara nodded. “Yeah, and few others.”

Pike nodded.

“I’ll want top of line equipment. MRI, CT, XRAY.”

Admiral Pike nodded, “You name it, you have it. I will spare no expense to this excursion,” he told her.

Clay paused. He knew just how damned expensive that equipment was.

“There’s a Marine base in Accra, Ghana,” Pike explained. “You’ll be stationed there. It’s on the coast, a Navy War ship will be stationed in the bay. The ship is currently in Norfolk and will depart in 1 week. Get me a list and I’ll make sure whatever, and I mean whatever you want is on that ship.” He leveled her with a serious look.

She nodded once. “I won’t sleep in the barracks,” she added with a small smirk. “I’m a married woman, and a Captain at that. I will share quarters with my husband on base.”

Admiral Pike laughed and nodded. “I already assumed that’d be the case. You will have Captain’s quarters for you and your husband.”

Clay had to smile at that. He otherwise kept quiet though. He let Kara run her own show. She had a way with people.

“And I’ll want dedicated choppers for MEDEVAC and CASEVAC. I won’t be stuck shitty like before. I want dedicated QRF standing by at all times, dedicated to our team and our teams only.”

Admiral Pike nodded. “Get with Jag tomorrow and write up everything you want. And I’ll sign off on it. And Kara,” he paused, looking at her intently. “And I mean everything.”

Kara locked eyes with him in a meaningful gaze for a moment before she nodded at him. Then she set her sights on Karl Higgins. “And what does the CIA want from me?” Kara looked expectantly at Higgins.

The Director shifted slightly in his seat. “The CIA would ask that you’d use your language skills and analytical skills while in the region to assist in the capture of any other HVT’s while over there,” Higgins said smoothly.

Kara narrowed her eyes on him. “Don’t bullshit me,” she demanded. “Exactly what do you want?”

Higgins shifted and got to his feet. “Ten years ago, the two of you managed to put such a significant dent into the Boko Haram network, that they’ve been a nonissue for the last decade. Together, your skills for detecting patterns and tracking people are unparalleled. We’d like you to continue doing what you did back then.”

“I won’t kill anyone,” Kara contested.

“You won’t have to,” Higgins shot back. “You would have two SEAL teams under your command to do that for you.”

Kara let out a hiss and glared at the Director. “That’s what this is about,” she growled. “You finally getting your way after all these years,” she accused the man. “Me leading a team.”

Higgins shifted, “You were one our best,” he stated plainly. “It was only natural progression had you stayed in the agency.”

Clay could see the fire smoldering in Kara’s green eyes.

“Had I stayed in the agency, I would have been Director by now,” she growled.

Clay smirked and had to nod in agreement. She had a point. Her tenacity, drive and sheer will power alone would have had her reaching for that top spot had she stayed.

“And I have no doubt about that,” Higgins agreed. “Look Kara, I’m sorry it had to be this way. I know in the end you never wanted this life. I respected that. I still do. This is just one of those things that came up, and as it’s personal, I thought you’d want to be at the reigns,” he conceded.

She nodded once. “I’m only in, until we bag Abubakar.”

“Understood,” Higgins nodded.

“And Ellis?” Kara asked.

“You’ll be her supervisor. You’ll be the ranking field agent, but Mandy Ellis will assist you in every way possible. She’s been read in and knows the history here. She’s ready to help,” Higgins hesitated nodded.

Kara paused, as if once again realizing the history she had in Africa. Clay shuffled over to her and slid his hand into hers. She squeezed it and looked up at Higgins. “I’ll have a laundry list for you too, tomorrow,” she grinned wickedly at the Director.

Higgins finally grinned broadly and nodded at her. “I’d expect nothing else. As always you will have the full support of the agency. Whatever you need, you can have. Just name it.”

“Oh, you know I will,” she smirked at him.

“So, you’ve agreed?” Admiral Pike asked.

“Yes, Sir,” Kara nodded in affirmative.

~*~

Jason was pacing the length of the Great Room. Derrick and Ray had told Trish and Naima to keep everyone outside, so it was only Bravo and Alpha Teams in the house. Jason paced by his men without a care for what they thought. They were all stressed out. Kara had become family to them in the last three weeks. She’d made it very clear that her and Clay had plans for their future and their family, that did not include her re-enlisting in the Navy.

When the office door opened, Jason stopped pacing and turned to see Clay walk out with Admiral Pike, Director Higgins, and Kara following behind. Neither Spenser made eye contact with the men in the room. Clay opened the front door and turned back toward the Admiral and Director.

Admiral Pike paused and turned back to Kara. “Kara,” he paused, feeling the eyes of the room on him. “I appreciate this. I know what kind of sacrifice you’re making to do this. I owe you one, you and Clay both,” Admiral Pike look at Clay too as he spoke the words.

Clay’s jaw clenched. Jason could see the vein popping as he ground his molars.

“Yeah, you do,” Kara shot out, her eyes hard as she stared up at the Admiral, her hand out.

Admiral Pike nodded and grinned ruefully down at her.

When he finally shook her hand, Kara said, “And John,” the look she leveled at Admiral Pike had chills running down Jason’s spine, her hand was still holding the Admiral’s. “You know I always collect my debts.”

The room went deadly still and silent as the threat lingered in the air.

Admiral Pike cracked a grin and laughed. “Still as ruthless as the day I met you,” he nodded at her.

She grinned wickedly back. “And don’t forget it.”

Admiral Pike dropped her hand and stood up straight and squared his shoulders. He looked her right in the eyes. “You have my word,” he declared, in front of a room full of Navy SEALS.

Admiral Pike turned to Clay and held out his hand. “That’s a hell of a woman you got there, Petty Officer.”

Clay nodded once at the man and shook his hand. “Don’t I know it, Sir,” Clay answered.

“If you need anything, you know my number,” Admiral Pike added and dropped his hand from Clay’s.

Clay nodded once and Admiral Pike walked out the front door.

Director Higgins walked toward the door. “Kara,” he stopped and paused in the doorway. “You won’t regret this,” he said to her.

Kara’s green eyes were hard as she stared down the Director. “Get the fuck out outta my house, Karl,” she shot at him, a glint in her eye.

The Director laughed and nodded once, then walked out the front door. Lt. Commander’s Rockwell and Blackburn nodded to the men, before they both followed out the door.

Once the door was closed, Kara’s shoulders slumped, and she let out a shaky breath. Clay pulled her into his arms immediately. No one said a word as the two embraced. Both looked absolutely wrecked after the meeting.

Kara pulled away abruptly and headed back into the office, slamming the door behind her.

Clay sighed and stared at the door before he ran his hand over his ballcap covered hair. He rubbed at the black hat and sighed before he walked over the kitchen and pulled out a glass and poured himself a glass of bourbon. Jason had seen him drinking beer all afternoon, so the change to whiskey was a telling sign. Jason walked over to the kitchen area and took a seat at the breakfast bar before Clay. “What can you tell us?”

Clay took a pull from his glass and shrugged a shoulder. “Not much. Not yet,” he shook his head. “We roll out in a couple weeks with Alpha,” he glanced at Derrick. “Bravo will take point with Alpha providing back up. Kara rolls with Bravo,” Clay shared a glance with Metal.

Jason kept his internal groan to himself. He hated straps. Now to have a team members wife strapped to their team? It was too messy. Too many things could go wrong. “And the location?” Jason asked.

“Can’t say yet. Pike said there should be a briefing Monday at base, to bring everyone up to speed,” Clay sighed and met Jason’s eyes.

Jason could see the pain in those baby blues. It was like a stab in the gut to see his rookie hurting so badly.

The office door swung open, and Kara stormed out, eyes red and hair in disarray. She carried a whiskey sniffer that was full. There was well over three fingers of whiskey in that glass. She glanced around the room and her gaze settled on Metal.

“Well, if it isn’t the green-eyed demon doc,” Sonny broke the silence of the Great Room. Kara shot her gaze to him, and he watched her warily. When Kara didn’t say anything, Sonny continued. “I’ve said it before, but you’re scary as hell Doc Spense,” he smirked.

“And why’s that?” Kara asked, her voice low.

“You threatened a five-star Admiral and lived to tell about it,” Sonny nodded at her.

Kara’s green eyes darkened as a rage settled over her face. “That wasn’t a threat,” she told Sonny with a nod. “That was a gods damned promise.”

Kara eyes were hard, and Jason could see her white knuckles gripping the glass in her hand.

Sonny swallowed and almost looked nervous.

Jason couldn’t blame him. There was something dead in Kara’s eyes. That spark that was usually there. The Kara-ness. It was gone. Every muscle in her being seemed different somehow. And the way Clay watched her. That’s what did it for Jason.

Clay’s eyes tracked Kara the moment the office door had opened, and his eyes hadn’t left her. While the concern was evident, there was something else there, a preternatural awareness that she was a hair-trigger away from doing something. But what?

“Kara,” Metal’s voice was hard.

Jason glanced at the man and saw Alpha One sitting there. The Master Chief, not Full Metal, the friend. Kara’s eyes were dead as she met his gaze. She lifted her glass to her lips and took several long pulls from the glass. When she lowered the glass from her lips, it was more than half gone.

Metal was clenching his jaw and staring at her with unrestrained anger.

The sliding glass door opened off the dining room, and Naima walked in holding Jameelah’s hand. “Sorry to interrupt,” Naima glanced around the room, measuring the tension in the room as she glanced around. “Bathroom break.”

Kara’s eyes snapped to hers and something seemed to snap into place.

Naima and Jameelah walked through the tense space and beelined for the stairs, choosing to use the bathroom upstairs over the powder room tucked around the wall behind the kitchen.

Kara set the glass of liquor down on the counter in front of her. Her hands were shaking. She let out a shaky breath and turned to Clay. From where Jason sat, he could see the tears welling in her eyes. Clay didn’t move though; he did not go to her. He still watched her, still with that preternatural stillness. “I can’t do this,” Kara’s voice was breathy and soft. A whispered plea, in a room full of harden warriors, a desperate call for help.

Metal cursed.

Jason sat up straight and glanced around the room. Derrick, Franklin and the other guys on Alpha looked absolutely gutted by her plea, but not one of them said anything. Not one of them went to her. They all looked to Clay.

Jason looked to Bravo, who all looked back at him desperately, except Trent, who had known Kara from before. Trent too, watched Clay.

When Ray went to say something, Clay spoke up. “You don’t have to. You didn’t sign any paperwork. You can turn it down,” Clay’s voice deep and calm, but still, he did not go to her.

Jason eyed him in confusion. They stood some ten feet apart, but it felt like there was an ocean between them.

Kara let out shaky laugh that had Jason turning to look at her. “And you gonna tell an Admiral, no?” she asked Clay.

He pulled his phone out of a pocket on his blue jeans. “I’ll call him right now and tell him no,” he nodded at her and held up his phone. His voice was smooth as steal, but still, he did not go to her.

Kara leaned forward and rested her elbows on the counter of the island and ran her fingers through her hair. She pulled on the locks before she let them go and let out another watery laugh and straighten up. “Why Africa?” she breathed.

Jason couldn’t take his eyes off her. She was a hair-trigger away from breaking, on the precipice of falling over, he could feel it with every fiber of his being.

Clay didn’t answer. He just stared at her with that preternatural awareness and waited. His eyes were hard. His face was an unreadable stone mask. And still, he didn’t not go to her.

“I would gladly go anywhere else in the world,” she breathed. “I would gladly dig ditches in the Korengal Valley before I went back to Africa.”

A hiss went around the room. The Valley was probably the most dangerous place in Afghanistan. To prefer that to Africa? What the fuck had happened in Africa that was so bad, that Kara didn’t want to go back, Jason thought.

Tears flowed freely down Kara’s beautiful face. Pain etched lines around her blazing emerald eyes.

“I know,” Clay nodded. His voice was soft as he rested his hands on the counter of the island and leaned forward and braced himself. There was a shift in him. That preternatural stare hardened, like he was bracing for impact. And still, he did not go to her.

Kara tossed back the rest of her whiskey. “I told you when we were eighteen,” she growled, her eyes dead again. Her voice was gravel. “I would never set foot on that god forsaken continent, if it was the last thing, I ever fucking did.”

The vein in Clay’s jaw popped as he worked his molars. Tears welled in his eyes as he watched her. But still, he did not go to her.

Kara closed her eyes; her breathing ragged. Then her eyes snapped opened, she let out a heart wrenching scream and hurled the whiskey glass into the farmhouse sink behind Clay. Glass shattered and erupted in an ethereal spray of crystal and liquid. There was heart piercing pain in those beautiful green eyes that would haunt Jason for the rest of his days, as would that scream of pain, and terror.

And then Kara was gone. Out of the kitchen, up the stairs and gone. She passed Naima and Jameelah on the stairs. Naima looked utterly terrified as she walked into the kitchen. Ray went to her immediately.

Clay let his head fall into his hands, and let out a ragged breath, the tension leaving his shoulders and body in such a force, he almost collapsed against the island.

“Okay, what the fuck was that?” Jason asked and stood up. He walked around the island toward Clay and caught the expression on all the men’s faces in the room. Alpha looked utterly wrecked. Trent too. They knew some detail that Bravo didn’t. They had some back story that the rest of them didn’t know. Jason hated that feeling more than anything else in the world.

Jason rested a hand on Clay’s shoulder and squeezed it, letting him know he had his back in a silent gesture.

Metal got to his feet.

Clay stood up straight. He lifted his head, wiped the tears from his eyes.

Metal headed moved toward the staircase.

“Do. Not.” Clay’s voice was hard as nails. He glared daggers at Metal.

Metal stopped at the base of the stairs and stared Clay down.

Jason had only seen Metal look at the enemy like that. But Clay… Jason had never seen Clay look so fucking deadly before. Not even in full gear, on the battlefield. Clay would throw down against Metal if he took one step up that staircase.

Metal sneered at Clay, then abruptly turned and stormed out of the house and slammed the front door behind him.

TAGLIST: @rebelwrites @heathermann200 @bravo-four-seal-team

[neshabeingchildish]

Madame President.

“On today’s special episode of Pipe Up! I would like to introduce Psychiatrist to the Supers…” Charlotte turned the TV down. It was recording, anyway. Piper double majored in psychology and sociology in college, worked as a professional counselor in her office, which was what used to be Junk N’ Stuff, became one of those internet professionals who had a thriving career and an online presence/following for it, not to mention all of her old following when she was a public figure… So it was only natural that her dreams of becoming a television lifecoach came true. She had done multiple talk shows as a guest, documentaries, reality projects for clients that she had who were famous, and for the past several years, after helping Charlotte to found SupesSpace (the mental health network for supers and heroes), she had her own show Pipe Up! Pipe Up was about helping and healing the heroes that kept our world safe, but also highlighted the professionals who guided them through those processes. 

It was partially mental health information, from professionals, testimonials from those who had been going through things (often heroes that had been nonconsensually unmasked, or had been forced into the life early - Piper and Charlotte’s soft spots), partially tips for those in need from the very people who did this kind of work, partially backstories of those people, because a lot of times, those not in the field considered them necessary, but rarely knew anything about them or took the time to ask them how they were. Sometimes, Piper’s clients wanted to share their story on the show and it would be special segments.

Today’s guest was the leading supers psychiatrist. Charlotte definitely wanted to see it, but had so much to do today. She was turning over her power to Max Thunderman, of all people. She had no idea that the super community would ever forgive him enough to entrust him with this position, but here they were - he was getting ready to “retire to” President of the Hero League, and she was getting ready to campaign for President of the United States.

There were a lot of people who didn’t like the thought of a super in the White House. Charlotte was tired of the gymnastics that once went into making people comfortable with having her in spaces that “weren’t meant” for her. While, some part of her worried that the Oval office was much too powerful and had too many possible setbacks for her to ever be able to redirect the country in much needed ways (even some of the historically “best” presidents had a tough time of making a dent in the state of things), she still held out hope that she could possibly make some kind of positive difference in an oppressive nation in a world built upon the oppression of others. 

Whenever she and Simone gathered to bring or pick up their children from playdates, she would always tell her, “You know that they’re going to suck your soul out in that position, right? It’s the reason that the Hero League acts in the best interest in humanity first and has sovereignty over supers. This country is a wasteland with a gated community of a certain percentile and that office is to keep the waste where it belongs and to go wherever it takes to obtain more for that gated community. Every U.S. President is a puppet and a clown…” Or some variation of it. 

Charlotte would toss a shady joke in her direction such as, “Every since you got those goddess locs, you’ve been on your bullshit again.” SImone would just smile and shake her head. Those locs looked great on her. Charlotte thought about them, but it was going to be difficult enough to run for a major office in this country with her natural hair, much less that style, as majestic as it looked. And Simone’s skin was shining every since she shed all the green genes. Max was always posting “My Four Girls,” her, in the middle of the twins and their youngest daughter Meaux (Pronounced “Mo”), now what 8 years old, maybe? They had twin boys in between her and the baby girl (Simon and Maximus Jr), maybe a year younger than Charlie - but Charlotte wasn’t keeping up with ages anymore, just how quickly everyone seemed to surpass her height! Charlie was the only kid of all their bunches that seemed like she probably wasn’t going to be taller or as tall (short) as Charlotte. 

Max, with his salt and pepper long hair and beard looked more like a supervillain than president of the Hero League, but insisted that was part of his “mystique.” He was the poster boy for reformation. He was what any villain could look to whenever they tired of their evil ways and for that, people felt somehow safer with him. He was always scrutinized for his past, therefore, they felt like he must’ve been really reformed, to not have had any incidents in nearly 20 years. With this position, Max had goals, but the greatest of them was to “Ride it out here until I die.” 

Meanwhile, Simone had not been involved in politics in a long time. Instead, she opened a center for supers who just want to be able to have normal lives. There were all grades of school and there was housing for those beyond school age. It was basically a supers community where nobody was expected to be the hero. She helped people to start businesses - everything from frozen yogurt shops to boutiques. She studied dance and opened her own dance studio in that community. But, The Center of Hope for Heroes (With the general prohibition sign covering the word Heroes) was in the center of the community and was the heart of it. It wasn’t too far from the Mimi Memorial, so Ray settled in the community with Katelyn, and buried her in tree form at Mimi’s grave. It took him a while to allow himself to care for another dog, but he’d frequently go to the dog shop to try to convince himself to do so. He was just tired of losing others and knowing that this was his fate as an indestructible man. He would last longer than most of the people he cared about. It was depressing, but the lady who owned the pet shop made it a little more bearable. 

She would introduce him to different dogs, but also gave him the information of a licensed supers counselor who worked with heroes who have lost partners. “A lot of people think that because they weren’t in the field with you that meant that they aren’t your partner, but you came home to her everyday and you took care of her, the two of you took care of each other, for many years. She counts as a partner and a friend and her loss is no less important than if you had lost a child or a romantic partner.” He had lost one of those and the potential other. He never really thought about talking to a counselor about it, beyond Piper, though. After he did, he went to check on another dog, and to check on the pet shop owner. She was single… and interested. He couldn’t stop smiling about the possibilities. Mimi would’ve wanted him to move on years ago, but his heart wasn’t ready. He and Katelyn simply coped until he had to face it - not everyone made it, and that was okay. He didn’t have to bury himself with those who left before he did, and they wouldn’t want him to...

.

Jasper was going to go ahead and call in his surrogate again. That was cool. If it was gonna be a girl, he wanted her to be called Bushida, which Charlotte told him she didn’t think that was a name and also that the word that he was probably looking for might not be appropriate for his daughter. If it was another boy, he wanted to call him Bucket. “Do you simply hate your children, or…?” He waved a hand at her. He didn’t care about the haters. Bushida or Bucket were gonna be well loved and have at least one dad that made them laugh ALL of the time. Mitch might be an overgrown child, but children loved that about him. 

Charlotte had so much money that before she even made her donations to charity, she honestly just made sure that her loved ones had everything that they could need. That meant all friends from the Man Cave, and now the Lady Lair - Piper’s family, their parents, even Jasper’s folks, the Thundermans, the Bilsky’s, The Center of Hope for, the Academy, despite Hamilton’s removal, Evelyn was still an important part of her life, and she believed in the school… She still had much to give away for her charity interests, technological advances, and other cares, causes and concerns. And, she would have enough to run a successful presidential campaign, hopefully while keeping her morals in tact.

Running a country with such a system in place and all of the insistence to continue it for all of the purposes that there were to continue it… She knew that wouldn’t be easy, if she even made it to that point. She did still have a husband and children and thought maybe, just maybe… She should actually take a BREAK, for once. 

.

Charlotte looked at herself in the mirror. She looked… similar to how she remembered. She looked at this version of herself a lot less than she had when she was younger. A lot of times, she had her hair and makeup done by someone else. A lot of times, she ate while she got dressed, or conferenced in on of of Hank’s corporate calls while she brushed her teeth on mute, or looked over assignments to dispatch heroes to while she did her skincare routine at her desk. This woman in the mirror - she was some person who had been much too busy to remember to pause every now and then. Even both of the times that she was on maternity leave, she always had a lot of “not on your feet” work to do and taking on a huge role at this moment would mean that she wouldn’t be able to get that break any time soon. It’d likely be about 2 years of campaigning, and then 4 years in office. She would probably look in the mirror in six years and the patch of gray that had grown across the front of her head would be a head full of gray and maybe there would be more worry creases and wrinkle lines.

Charlie helped her put her hair up and they had a mother daughter spa day, which was usually Charlotte trying to relax while a very excited Charlie, with very expensive product on her flopped around and attempted to tell her 50-11 stories. At the end of it, Charlotte never felt reasted, at all… just softer. She’d put Charlie to bed, check around the house to see if Hank was there (he usually wasn’t). Much like both of his parents, he was quite the workaholic. He was generally in the Danger Fortress, though… That was what Charlie had somehow gotten them to start calling the command center from which Charlotte used to assist Mr. Danger. Hank would work on upgrading things for fun, sometimes with Schwoz’s help or guidance. She found him in there, with four holographic screens pulled up with stats from businesses and with campaign projections.. “Hope you’re wrapping up and getting ready to head to bed,” she said.

“I don’t have anything to do in the morning,” he observed, typing notes on a notepad connected to his waist. 

“Fifteen minutes,” she said and made eye contact with him.

“Yes, Mom.” She looked around the room. It felt different, but the design wasn’t new. She just knew that a lot had changed since she set it up. “Miss it?” Hank wondered.

“Not especially. But, I have a lot attached to it. How are Henry’s legs?”

“In perfect shape. I would tell you if anything changed.” He began to shut things down and they left the room together. “Charlie is coming into the lair tomorrow, so I wanted to have everything squared away.”

“Coming in for training?”

He nodded and went into his bedroom, “Homework first though. I told her that I would help her with it because Dad helped her and wound up having to look up all the answers to her math. She got points deducted because she didn’t show the work.”

“Ugh. He’s supposed to grab you when he doesn’t know what he’s looking at!” She complained. 

“I was at the site we’re looking at for Page & Thunderman Corp. But, I’ll handle it tomorrow.” He gave her a kiss on the face and went into the room. She watched him for a moment, kick off his shoes, but neatly place them in a shoe rack, grabbed his night clothes and activated his computer to work on verbal command. 

She went in and checked the crystals that she knew he only kept nearby because of her. “Interface, adjust Hammy’s room for sleep, not work and replace his crystals and put these with those that need cleansing and charging, please.”

“Yes, Madame President.” She furrowed her eyebrows, and left the room. Henry was doing pull ups in his home gym and she got his attention and tapped her watch at him. He nodded, finished his set and grabbed his towel. “Did you know that Interface called me Madame President tonight?”

“Yeah, we programmed her to do that. Well, Hank programmed her to do it, but it was my idea. You always tell me that you gotta envision and claim and manifest.” She smiled at him and he kissed her on the cheek. “You take a shower yet?”

“No, I was waiting on you, Dude. But, Charlie told me about you planting her a violet garden and getting her a statue commissioned?”

“I’m positive that she said ‘commisionerred,’ because that’s what she said every single time, but yeah. I’m using my allowance card, because honestly, what I promised her is gonna cost me.”

“Stop promising her grand things.”

“She’s my daughter,” he said, as though that settled it. She nodded, so it did. “She wants the garden to have a fence with purple lights, a purple birdbath, with a birdhouse hovering above it and a bird feeder inside the birdhouse - all this is supposed to be purple, so I guess I’m gonna have to decide which shades, because naturally I won’t just have a big violet eyesore on the premises. There’s a place for all of the plants on these grounds.”

“I actually already heard the plans. I just wanna get your hot body into the shower so that I can have my way with you and you can put me to sleep.” 

Henry threw his towel away and set his water down and picked her up to go do just that. 

They were laying in bed afterward and Charlotte commented, “You make love to me like I’m still as beautiful as when we started.”

“Well, dang… I was tryin’ to do it like you’re more beautiful now than you’ve ever been!” He smiled at her. She looked emotional. “You okay?”

“I’m tired and I feel old, but I have goals and I know that I won’t rest until I’ve met them. I just want to be able to take a break… but I guess that’s what retirement is for. 65 full stop, right?”

“I’m leaning more towards 45, but…” She looked at him and he said, “Just kidding. These legs have another good 50 years. My heart will give out before they will. So… Maybe 65 for me. I already feel old, though.”

“Your work is physical. You really need to start looking for a sidekick, Hen. You don’t want to be old and trying to train someone through a headset.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I’ll start thinking about it. Maybe I’ll create an ad on FaceMask.”

“I think SymBIOsis would be better for it. More range.”

“Yeah, but FaceMask is tried and true. I KNOW I’ll get legit level sidekick there… if I EVEN do that!”

“Well, I just want us to one day be able to take a break, while I still have some life left in me.”

“You… You get some news or something?” He asked, concerned.

“I looked in the mirror. Some old chick was looking at me. Had the nerve to be moving like I was, like she was me or something.” 

He smiled and nudged her with his nose, “Oh, her… I don’t know how to tell you this, but I’ve been hitting that for years. She really does it for me. I’m sure she always will, and I just can’t let her go.”

“What if she gets older and older and more old?”

“I’m gonna be tapping it until her hips go bad.” 

She cackled at his proclamation. “She must have that good good!”

“The goodest,” he said and winked at her.

.

Two years later

"I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States..."

Hank didn’t want to live in the White House. Henry didn’t want to leave the Charteaux to landscapers, even the finest that they hired to keep up with everything. Charlie just wanted to be a superhero and being the President’s daughter seemed pretty close to that, so she was fine with whatever. She was more concerned about her facial adjustments and her body changes. 

The first concern was the fact that she had glasses. She had to get them when she turned 11, but she was constantly breaking them to the point that now, she had ones that were much too big for her face, in her opinion and the ones that Hank worked on for her were more like goggles… So those messed with her hair, which was already a lot to take care of! The next concern was NOW, she needed braces! And… she hated the thought of it. She’d have to care for them and clean them and all of that? She hated stuff like that! For what? Straight teeth without gaps in them? For her mom’s perfect set? What could possibly go wrong with her body next?

She hated that she asked! Because not too much longer afterwards, she went to the bathroom and there was blood everywhere. Now… she knew what it was and she had been taught what to do when it happened, but when it happened, she just froze for a moment, then rushed to try to clean up and score protection. She didn’t tell her mother about it. She knew that she’d probably have some kind of serious person talk with her and she wasn’t into that. She told Hank and he got her everything that she needed and then binged movies with her and ate snacks. He was sincerely the best brother and she always loved the fact that everybody else thought he was words like “pretentious” and “narcissistic,” but she only knew him as “awesome.”

They were in her second cycle and their new way of handling it whenever she commented, “I wonder now that Mom’s president if that means that I can start trying to look into doing things through Hero League, since she can’t BLOCK me anymore.” She said it with a lot of resentment that Hank didn’t appreciate, but he understood the frustrations. To this day, he had held himself back from trying to become a super because of his anxiety over what Charlotte would say, do, or think if something went wrong.

“I’m sure that she has Maxi on the lookout for stuff like that, but… I mean, maybe she’d go a little bit easier now that you’re 13 and you’ve reached this portion of your journey.”

“What does that mean? Say it like I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Well, you know, because you have a superpower, you can register for legal adulthood when you hit puberty, but you already have to be in a position to take care of yourself, for instance have money, powers, or intelligence that makes you capable of supporting your own lifestyle and needs, OR you have to be a registered hero with the Hero League. I can’t imagine that Mom WOULD support you moving forward with it, but if you want me to try to talk to her, I can always remind her that dad started his job at your age.”

She gasped and asked, “HE DID???”

“Yeah… Dad used to be Kid Danger, didn’t you know that?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t know that he was an actual KID, I thought it was a nickname like that funny guy you listen to on old podcasts! Kid Fury! Dad was a KID kid when he was Kid Danger? That means that I’M ready to be a sidekick too! He’s been looking for one, but he’s been training one the whole time!”

“I don’t know… I was thinking more along the lines of you speak to them about becoming legal, getting your inheritance turned over to you and safely living freely until you’re actually old enough to be a superhero.”

“I AM actually old enough to be one! You just said it! It’s legal and it would be hypocritical for them to refuse me! Daddy did it!”

“I don’t think you’re getting the moral of my message…” She zipped out of the room and he massaged his temples, “Mom is gonna be piiiiiiiiiiiiissed.”

.

Mr. Danger was appointed to President Page by the Hero League for the first ever Head of the Super Secret Service. The Secret Service would still be in effect, but it was unprecedented that an unmasked super was President of the United States and therefore, getting non-pow humans to guard her life seemed unfair and unethical to her. She had never even had bodyguards before, save Mr. Danger, so an entire team felt like a lot for her. But, if they were supers, she felt better and if Danger was in charge of those supers, well - that was the best case scenario. The children had non-pow secret service, simply because she certainly didn’t want to put any of these dutiful people out of work.

Charlotte was in meetings with Mr. Danger posted outside whenever Charlie got her guards to bring her to him. He thought it might be an emergency, but kept a calm face. “Charlie, what is it?”

“Hank told me that you began being a superhero when you were my age, which means that I’m eligible for being your sidekick and I won’t take no for an answer, because that would be unfair!”

“We have to discuss this later, Sweetie,” he said and gestured for them to lead her back to her room.

“Just tell me yes right now. We shouldn’t have to discuss anything, Daddy. You say all the time that I’m way better at what I do than you were when you were younger! I didn’t know that you HAD THE JOB when you were underqualified! I am over qualified then and you need a sidekick…” 

He nodded his head, “Okay, Sweetie, but Mommy’s in here working and Daddy has to guard and keep a lookout, so please, let them bring you back to your room…” She squealed and hugged him and rushed off, telling her guard about how she was going to be a sidekick. Wait.. Had he said that to her? He replayed the conversation in his mind… 

Her: just say yes…

Him: Okay, Sweetie… but… 

“Oh my God… Charlotte’s gonna be piiiiiiiiiiiiised,” he whispered to himself.

.

Charlie handed Hank her designs for her costume and her notes of the features she needed, “You can do this, right?”

“No, Charlie! Mom is not gonna let you be Dad’s sidekick. I don’t care what you think he said to you today,” He looked at the designs, “But, this is excellent work. You… must’ve gotten mom’s fashion bug.”

“Mom? Fashion?” She busted out laughing. “Anyway… So, see here, that violet will be what we can use to keep me tuned into the Interface… And I will actually settle for goggles in costume, since I can’t imagine going to battle with these!” She pointed to the glasses on her face. “This getting  a period thing kinda rocks. I know what they mean when they say you become a woman…” She looked at Hank. He was still studying her plans and apparently hadn’t heard her.

“And the schematics are properly done to scale.”

“Ummm, you bug me about details all of the time.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t expect you to pay attention. I’ve been bugging Dad about details since I was a kid. He still tells me stuff like, “Just take it in a little in the middle and make it a tad longer in the back. I blame mom for knowing what he means by non-measurements and just making it work. But… I need to go to the Danger Fortress…”

“I’m coming!”

“No, we can’t both go. Mom will flip out.”

“Why would she? We’ll have those secret service dudes for decoration and me for protection! I’m a sidekick now, Hank.” He sighed and rolled his eyes, grabbing her hand to help her up. “Should we clean this up before we go? Mommy says it’s rude to just leave a mess, even when there’s a maid.”

“We’re coming back.”

“You’re gonna stop doing a project to come back here?”

“Good point, make it snappy and meet me at the car.”

“Will you leave me if I’m not quick enough?” She asked. He smirked, but didn’t answer, so she hauled ass to clean up their mess and rushed to meet him at the car to go back to the property and work.

.

Charlotte came out of her chambers hours later and all she wanted to do was kiss her husband, hug her kids and try to settle for the night until the next obligation. Mr. Danger was pacing, and not wearing his mask.. Which - technically, he didn’t need it because the world knew who he was, but he still wore it because of work and stuff. “Hey, you okay?” She asked. He yelped at the sound of her voice and smiled at her, “Okay… Tell me what’s going on.”

“Okay. Well. I. May. Have… Possiblyyyyyyyyy… Perhaps… Mayhaps, even… Perchance…”

“Henry!” 

“I told Charlie that she could be my sidekick!” He gasped right after he finally said it out loud and covered his own mouth, like that was going to have him to take it back.

She looked relieved, “Oh. Jeez. You scared me for a moment. I thought it was something serious.”

“She and Hank are at the Danger Fortress working on her costume.”

“Wait. Right now? You told Charlie that she could be your sidekick right now? At her age? In this time? While I’m the president and you’re supposed to be working here on my behalf?”

“That’s the beauty of it, right? If she’s my sidekick, then she’s just at my side in the White House and stuff. We won’t have an assignment assignment for like 4 years!” He cheered, having just thought of this right now.

“Only, that’s not true. You’re one of the Hero League’s best operatives. Max isn’t just letting me HAVE you for four years. You’re creating a system, showing this group how to on the job and I’m sure that within months, maybe even weeks, he’ll have you in the field, on assignment! You… You gotta go tell her that you made a mistake and it can’t happen!”

He sucked in air through his teeth and clasped his hands, “I’ve tried to, but she keeps bringing up great points and now, I don’t know… I’m gonna just give it a shot…” Her face went on a full journey through emotions that he knew, ones that maybe she didn’t even know, and ones that terrified him, before she smiled and blinked her eyes and asked, “Why would you do this?” She clenched her fists and then held out her hands, honestly awaiting an answer.

“Hey, I started at 13 and I was fine.”

Almost immediately, she lost her entire cool, “Ray broke child labor laws, not to mention behaved morally and ethically questionable in hiring you! You were too young and it wore you out! It was incredibly hard for you and he didn't even cut you slack! If I thought for one moment that you would follow in his footsteps, I wouldn't have given you my support in your hero’s journey and certainly wouldn't have bore your children!”

He hated when she did this. She would get mad and go off on him and say something just nasty and hurtful like this. “Char, you're angry, so you're being mean…”

“You're darn right, I'm angry. Our daughter hates me enough already and now I have to go tell her that I'm forcing her not to be able to do what you promised her. Damn you, Henry, for making me have to make her hate me more!” Her voice was loud and high pitched and she knew that she shouldn’t be doing this in the White House, because somebody somewhere would have something to say about it, but her nerves were bad about this. The relationship with Charlie had been struggling since she was a little girl and whenever Charlotte began working towards being the president, a lot of Charlie’s ways and habits just… would no longer fly. She didn’t understand why SHE had to be a presentable aspect of Charlotte’s life and whenever Charlotte explained how difficult it was and how hard on her the public would be because of her marginalizations - race, gender, superpower, it would be even harder to gain their approval. But, Charlie couldn’t comprehend why she would WANT approval of anybody that she worked hard to get it from. Why not just be herself and they could take it or leave it. Hell, Charlotte playing the game was how she was even privileged enough to feel entitled to people receiving her. She was floating on Charlotte’s respectability and...

“Charlie does not hate you. She loves you. You two just don't have much in common. She wants to impress you, like Hank does. She thinks this is the only way to do that. If she can't do it, she won't hate you, but she'll be worried that you'll never see her the way that you see Hank.”

“This is unfair, Hen.” She whispered it, and her voice sounded almost like begging. It was breaking his heart, but of course, he would fix it. Of course, he would answer whatever plea her words couldn’t form.

“Char… Just, give me the chance to have her as my sidekick. Of course, I'm not gonna follow in Ray's footsteps. She'll be fighting crime with me, but I'll be protecting her while we do.”

“She'll be an easy target for any villain with half a brain!”

“I won't allow it. I promise… Char, I promise you, on us - on my love for you, on our family - that I will never let anything happen to Charlie, in the field, or otherwise.”

“On us, huh?”

He nodded once, “On us.” 

She sat in that for a while and he rocked on the balls of his feet, eager for some confirmation that she believed in him and trusted him to do this properly. He was a great father, but he was also a great superhero and with mixing both of those things, yes - he full well knew that it would be much tougher when he had one of the loves of his life in the thick of danger with him, but he wanted both of his girls happy and both of them healthy. “Well, that's a grave promise. Because, if anything does happen to her, Henry, you're dead to me. I mean it.”

“I know. If anything happens to her, I'm dead to me, too. I wouldn't be able to live another day.”

“I want her happy, but I want her safe.”

“We'll make sure that she's both.”

[hillaryisaboss]

Bernie supporters cry about Hillary not uniting progressives and Democrats. That she shouldn't focus on the past. That we should be focused on "moving forward." Yet this conveniently ignores Hillary's new organization, "Onward Together," which supports/funds young progressive organizations and young progressive candidates running for office. But I must ask: wasn't it Bernie who stayed in the primary long after he couldn't win mathematically? If anyone shouldn't discuss coming together for the greater good, it's Bernie "Insurgent" Sanders. The dragged out primary caused lasting damage to Hillary, especially because Bernie allowed his surrogates and supporters to demonize "corrupt" Hillary, often in vile sexist terms. They also bullied, harassed, and terrorized Hillary supporters online. Bernie also gave Trump the perfect playbook: "Crooked Hillary." A nick-name reinforced by decades of GOP smears, innuendo, conspiracy theories, and fake "scandals" that wasted millions in taxpayer money (Hillary has still never been charged or convicted of anything. Ever.) At the end of the day, Bernie didn't unite us when it counted most. So please stop telling Hillary to unite us in 2017, 3 long years before the 2020 Presidential election. We need an accurate assessment of history in order to go forward successfully. Everyone should be outraged that a foreign power influenced the outcome of our election and installed a puppet. We are now the laughing stock of Putin. He wanted a weak America and he got one with Trump at the helm. Remember: Putin was yet another man that feared the strength and power of Hillary Diane Rodham Clinton. Lucky for Putin, he was able to install a 24-hour American circus instead. Let us also remember: Hillary restrained herself during the primary due to the advice of President Obama. Obama reminded Hillary that we had to unite progressives for the general election. To not focus on Crazy Bernie's rape essay's, the fact his plans didn't add up and would raise taxes on low-income and middle-class Americans, that his record of accomplishments is restricted to naming post-offices, and that he would be slaughtered on Fox News for his socialism ("ALERT: Crazy Bernie is going to raise taxes on everyone!!!!") -- Hillary couldn't bring any of this up. Though she did rightfully criticize his pro-NRA record. Sadly, the protracted primary made it so a core chunk of Bernie supporters were never going to vote for Hillary ("Bernie-or-Bust"). It also meant Trump had a head-start on the general election and Hillary had less time to unite Democrats and progressives. But here's the thing: Bernie isn't a Democrat and still to this day attacks Democrats. He wouldn't even appear in an "I'm With Her" ad. Has Bernie ever truly cared about uniting us? Or is he just trying to make himself be remembered as something more than a spoiler? Another Ralph Nader in the books of history. Maybe Bernie should look inward. He should look at his actions during the primary. He divided us when it mattered most. When we needed to come together to beat Trump. On the contrary, Hillary is correcting the record in 2017. Long before the 2020 election. And you bet she'll be out there for **DEMOCRATS** in 2018, too (pssst: you need Democrats in Congress to get anything done, Bernie!) Hillary will slaughter Trump and his minions in her 2018/2020 speeches. Why? Because everything Hillary predicted in regards to Trump is coming true: Unfit. Unqualified. Unpresidential. Propaganda Artist. Scapegoating. Nationalism. Authoritarianism. Incompetent. Inexperienced. Con-man. Bigot. Sexist. Reckless. Dangerous. Fear. Division. Racist-lover. Narcissist. Bully. But the woman who finally deconstructed and dismantled Trump (after so many men failed to do so) is not allowed to discuss "What Happened" from her perspective? The woman who got 3 million more votes in the general election and 4 million more votes in the primary? Apparently, Hillary's campaign of "Love Trumps Hate" and "Stronger Together" appealed to more voters than both of her opponents. Hillary is the popular vote Queen. Never forget that. Maybe Trump and Bernie should be asked why they think Hillary's campaign appealed to more people? I think it's because Hillary's plans and platform appealed directly to 2016 America (not white men like Bernie and Trump). Too bad the media didn't cover her amazingly researched plans and proposals. Donald was just too much fun -- a reality show. Oh and, "...but her e-mails!!!!" Fact is: most losing Presidential candidates are never told to "shut up" and "go away." Gore, Kerry, McCain, Romney? All were given some level of RESPECT. But Hillary? She's told to "shut up" and "go away" even though she received 3 **MILLION** more votes than her general election opponent. Despite all of Hillary's mistakes, Russian interference, voter suppression, Bernie, the media's false equivalence between Trump's negatives and Hillary's negatives, fake Benghazi & e-mail "scandals," and yes -- even sexism... Hillary still won by 3 million votes. And was headed towards an electoral victory after her 3 debate dominations. But then came Comey in the final days. Sabotaging Clinton right at the end. However, Hillary still won the popular vote by millions... and had already made it to the White House twice with her husband, leaving us a great economy and surplus. But I guess I shouldn't be surprised when American society tells a woman of this stature to "shut up" and "go away." So I truly do hope Hillary's book sells millions of copies just to spite the sexist haters. She warned us. She was right. So let's go forward as the 66 million MAJORITY. "Nevertheless, she persisted." Onward Together!!

[idolizerp]

LOADING INFORMATION ON 1NFERNO’S MAIN VOCAL BAE HYUKJAE...

IDOL DETAILS

STAGENAME: Samuel CURRENT AGE: 24 DEBUT AGE: 21 TRAINEE SINCE AGE: 16 COMPANY: Midas ETC: Due to his extensive charity work and clean image he’s known as the nation’s man of good influence

IDOL IMAGE

he’s the ‘all-american boy’, always pulling out english words in the middle of an interview and everyone finds it endearing, almost as if he forgot what he was going to say (and sometimes, he does) but most people think it’s adorable. but not really, no. what samuel did was very simple: he used his resources.

the whole thing about: if you got it, flaunt it? he flaunts it.

he’s the one who wears the cute animals hats, the one who tilts his head from one side and then to the other, catering to the more-than-in-love fans who can’t get enough of his cuteness. he doesn’t mind it, he thinks it’s fun, he thinks it’s a good way to win the fans’ love. he’s not even embarrassed by it, because many are. but he’s not, because if he has it? he flaunts it.

that’s what everyone told him when he was a trainee, anyway.

“use this. use that. no, no, not that. yes! that! that is perfect.”

he listened. he learned.

maybe it was the gentleness in his heart or the fact he was always taught to follow the rules, who knows? at the end of the day, he followed every single thing he was told to do, just as every trainee must.

“maybe say ‘oh my god!” when you’re surprised, they’re gonna love you.”

he said it.

“you should definitely wear this. they will adore you.”

he wore it.

hyukjae has always been perfectly crafted to be the sweet one, to be the one who stands between their group mates when they’re all jokingly having beef with each other, to be the one who laughs at everyone’s jokes and subsequently, to be the one telling the silliest jokes. which people laugh at because they happen out of nowhere more often than not.

and he’s okay with all of it because if he has it, you guessed it, he should flaunt it, right?

spontaneity is important, after all, and while he might not be the loudest personality in the group, he knows how to speak. with a calm, yet direct and articulated tone, samuel speaks with grace and knows exactly how to connect his brain to mouth filter, always making sure to say the right things, careful not to say anything controversial (and so far? so good).

but this image doesn’t work with anyone, or at least, not with a few eager to know about his past. what is he exactly hiding behind those sweet, gentle eyes? no one really knows, and they don’t really like it. despite the image midas has tried so hard to shine upon him, people see beyond all of it (or rather, they don’t see enough) and that is a good reason to not trust him, immediately turning into doubters, into ‘haters’ if you will.

not everyone is going to like you, and everyone knows that. so hyukjae focuses on the positives, on trying not to care much about doubters and people who want to know about his past and focus on what matters: on being a kind person. because the catch is simple: he is. he’s always the one being the nice one, the kind one, and not because midas fabricated it. it’s because he is.

the fans see, love & appreciate how outspoken he is towards animals, how he’s always asking people to consider adopting a pet, how he’s always asking fans to not give him expensive gifts and instead to donate that money to a charity of their choosing (although he always suggests donating to animal shelters). while he tries to do charity on the side, not wanting anyone to know about it, it usually comes out and the fans cannot stop praising him for it.

and it’s truly the little things, isn’t it? perhaps he doesn’t have the most flattering past (or at all) and perhaps the company keeps pressuring him into creating whatever sob story he can come up with. but he doesn’t. because hyukjae pushes samuel to work as hard as he can, to be the best he can be, to be kind and good to others and for the fans to see that.

not the fabrications, but him. just him.

IDOL HISTORY

no one ever understood how his mother married that man. when you put things into perspective? he didn’t either.

she was young. he was ten years older than her. no one really thought the age gap was an issue, the issue could be found somewhere else: he wasn’t a good person. but she didn’t think too much of it, she was young, in love, eager to be one of those school girls who get involved with the bad guys, with the rebel ones. luckily (or unluckily) for her? she got what she wanted. the wedding came only 7 months after they started dating, and not exactly because they were deeply in love with each other (no, his mother claims she fell out of love three weeks into their relationship), but because she got pregnant.

one and then another.

the bae family then decided to move to the united states, to be more specific: chicago, illinois. a year later, bae jiohami gave birth to a healthy baby boy they named ‘hyukjae’, much to her husband’s discontent. the delusion creeping further into his brain everyday; if they were in america now, why keep holding on so hard to their roots? it didn’t make sense to him.

and so, years passed by, where his mother was used to the comfort of a home and his father was used to having someone willing to keep the house clean everyday. essentially, his parents were conformists.

but he surely wasn’t.

hyukjae was the boy who pranced around their place, singing, dancing, disguising himself and pretending to be the star of a show. he was the boy who dreamed, the boy who wanted to reach for the stars, the boy who knew this kind of life wasn’t for him, no, no. he wanted more and he was going to aim for more.

he turned four years old and his father decided they had enough of illinois and decided the whole family should now move to los angeles, california. of course, the boy was more than excited, that was the place where all of the big music and tv stars were, right? and he wanted to be one of them, one of those big music and tv people. what he didn’t know, however, was the reason why. his father’s version? they wanted to find better life opportunities. the real version? his father was afraid. he was afraid of getting caught; a scammer always on the run. he fooled people. he stole from them. he took things he shouldn’t possess. he was bad, and he didn’t want to be held accountable for his actions; so he ran and took his family with him. first from seoul, then from chicago.

adapting? it wasn’t easy. he was only four almost five when he was put to test, when he was told he had to learn another language, when he had to sit with his kindergarten teacher during recess because she was kind enough to teach him as much as she could. at home? his mother did her best. his father did nothing. his older brothers didn’t care. so he realized: he was on his own.

the only thing his father ever did was to suggest a ‘name change’. something that “will make you fit in with everyone else”, and although his mother wasn’t too happy about it, his father convinced her when he suggested the name ‘samuel’.

“it means name of god, darling. it fits him right, doesn’t it?”

and yet, even though easily manipulated, there was one thing he had to applaud to his mother, and that was the passion she gave him. the fire she used to motivate him. even if her english wasn’t good, she tried and at the same time encouraged him to listen to his teachers, to soak in as much as he could, to reach his goals, to make his dreams come true. she tried the same with his brothers, but they weren’t interested at all, no. they were interested in the easy money, in the bad things dad used to do.

except he didn’t ‘use’ to do those things and hyukjae learned that when he was nine.

whenever his father would take him and his brothers out, he’d try to encourage him to steal from people, to pickpocket them. after all, he was a child, who would suspect him? in his father’s words? no one. but hyukjae was terrified at the idea, he was embarrassed to even imagine himself doing such thing, so he didn’t, and every time he refused? he had to face severe consequences.

could he even fight it? no chance.

to suppress the pain, the boy with the dreams kept fighting for them. at school, he was the one who now sat down with his friends and tried to teach them korean. some thought it was silly, some thought it was cool. soon, hyukjae had built a reputation for himself, and luckily, a good one. most of the girls were enamored by his passion, because he didn’t care about singing down the hallways or about auditioning for the school plays, casually always getting the lead roles. he was loved and admired and he was happy about it. very.

but not everything is roses, that is for sure.

when he was thirteen, the chance of “his life” (or so he claimed back then) arrived. a tv show was holding auditions for kids, talented kids. do you know how to sing? dance? do a trick? have a special talent? it didn’t matter! that was the perfect opportunity for any kid who wanted to start a career. he told his mother about it, because he knew his father wouldn’t approve of it. she was elated with the idea so they secretly planned to sneak out of home very early to go to the audition.

that, however, didn’t happen.

unaware that one of his brothers was listening to their conversation, the news didn’t take long to get to his father’s ears, who completely forbid him (and his mother) from going. at the time? she gave up. she said ‘okay’. she turned to hyukjae and apologized. and him? what else could a thirteen year old do if it wasn’t to reassure his mother everything was fine? not much else.

days later, while his father and brothers were sleeping, his mother pulled him out of bed, got him dressed, gave him a backpack with his belongings and said; “we’re going to follow your dreams. let’s go.”

because for once and for him? she’d do anything. she had submitted herself for so long, she had done everything her husband wanted and that was fine as long as he only wanted to mess with her. but when he dared mess with her son? with his dreams? she wouldn’t allow that. she wasn’t leaving america completely happy, however, because she was leaving her two older sons behind, but what could she do when they were the same kind of people her husband was? nothing. and if she could save hyukjae from following their steps? she would.

going back to south korea wasn’t easy. it wasn’t like hyukjae entirely forgot the language (especially because korean was what they used when at home), but adapting? it was hard. he didn’t feel any kind of connection to his roots due to his father’s obsession, and perhaps it had been easy for his four year old self when he had to learn a whole new language and culture, but now as a teenager, it wasn’t easy at all. his classmates weren’t easy either. he was mocked because they had this “idea” he thought he was better than them only because he came from america.

it was not okay, but he pushed himself into believing it was just for the sake of ignoring it and focusing on what truly mattered: his career.

when he had just turned fifteen, hyukjae attended his very first audition at kjh global creative. the line was long and he was intimidated. he saw so many kids, some singing, some dancing, some just trying to look pretty. he didn’t think he was a great dancer, but he did trust his singing abilities, he always did! from his perspective? he thought he did well. and maybe he did, but it wasn’t enough. maybe he was too late, maybe there were far more talented kids in that line, who knows? either way, his mother didn’t allow him to feel disappointed. “you’ll make it next time, i promise.”

his next time came a year later, his mother worked hard to afford singing and dancing lessons for him so this time, he felt much more confident about himself. much more ready and prepared for it. and this time? it was midas media’s turn. just as it was also his turn to prove himself. and he did.

his mother was elated, happy that her son was just one step away from making his dreams come true. but they surely didn’t know that the process wouldn’t be easy at all, though.

everything he practiced as a kid, everything he learned during those singing and dancing classes prior to signing seemed like “nothing” compared to his trainee days. it was exhausting, it was almost painful. he put his entire heart, his entire soul, his entire mind into it. he gave his all, not only professionally, but personally too. he wanted to stand out, he wanted to shine, he wanted to show the world he could be whoever he wanted to be and he knew he wouldn’t be able to do that if he didn’t give his 200% to this. so he did.

and so, five years later, 1nferno happened and he was starstruck. was that a dream? was he about to be woken up by his father? get told he was an idiot for believing he’d make it this far? nope, that didn’t happen. this was real and it hit him to think: that all of those years he spent practicing? that all of those years he spent training? they truly weren’t the beginning of his journey, no. this was.

but then he’s starts getting too fabricated. then he’s being asked to say and do things that can make him stand out because he’s always just /there/, he’s always just /behind/. so he started pulling out the english (a thing he had put in the back of his mind when his korean classmates mocked him for it), he started pulling his ‘cute’ stunts, he started trying to crack jokes. he pulled all of the stops and some work and some don’t, but he keeps trying.

for someone who only wanted to sing? he thought he was doing okay.

that is, until everyone wanted to know more about him. yes, he was born and had spent most part of his life in america, and? what happened over there? yes, he has a family, and? where are they? why does he only talk about his mother? why is his father not being mentioned? how about his siblings? what happened to them?

there were many questions and he didn’t have the answers. or he did, he just didn’t want to share them. he got asked to fabricate them, but he couldn’t do that either. so the people started to mistrust him. they started to think there was something fishy about him. so sure, samuel bae is talented, sweet, cute, he’s kind and he loves animals, he caters to his fans and he does anything to keep everyone happy.

but some people still think his life situation is.. shady.

so the speculations started to rain on him. “his father is probably dead, so it’s horrible he doesn’t want to talk about him.”, “what if his brothers did something bad?”, “i bet his family was involved in some sort of crime, maybe that’s why he avoids talking about them.”

there’s a new theory everyday. a new rumor. a new something.

in the same fashion, there are new fabrications on his shoulders. maybe if he acts a different way, maybe if he tones something down, maybe if he starts doing something new. maybe. maybe. maybe. maybe they’ll leave him alone.

but they don’t and they won’t and hyukjae is aware of it. he’s aware that people will dig and dig and dig until they get the truth, and while they don’t get it? they’ll create, create and create until he gives up and speaks up. but he won’t, he won’t because he’s only human, because that’s something he wants to keep to himself, at least that.

because in the end? he’s only a boy with dreams.

[viralhottopics]

A brief history of Obama’s corny jokes

POTUS loves to laugh, and he loves a good corny joke even more.

Image: ethan miller/ Getty Images

Barack Obama: 44th U.S. president, Harvard Law grad, and middle-aged father who makes the most perfectly terrible dad jokes.

Last year, the annual Thanksgiving Turkey pardoning saw the commander-in-chief directly address his penchant for some good old-fashioned dad humor.

SEE ALSO: The Obamas paid a visit to Sasha and Malia’s donated swing set

So for the past seven years I’ve established another tradition: embarrassing my daughters with a corny-copia of dad jokes about turkeys.

From groan-worthy puns to smoking burns, Obama has been giving us doses of that predictable G-rated humor we all know (and sometimes love) ever since first taking office.

Here’s a look at all the jokes that brought him to where he is today. Cheers to you, Barry.

2009

At the White House Correspondents Dinner, Obama was just barely dipping his toe into the pool of corny dad humor. He played it safe with something self-deprecating, deserving of a playful eye-roll and a cordial courtesy laugh.

John McCain is onto something, he said. There was a point in my life when I started palling around with a pretty ugly crowd, Ive got to be honest. These guys were serious deadbeats; they were lowlifes; they were unrepentant no-good punks. Thats right: Ive been a member of the United States Senate.

Along with that knee-slapper, he like any lovable, dorky dad drew some playfully awkward attention toward his children.

“Sasha and Malia aren’t here tonight because they’re grounded. You can’t just take Air Force One on a joy ride to Manhattan. I don’t care whose kids you are.”

Alright Dad. Alright.

And then there was the shout-out he gave to the famously toned arms of the one and only FLOTUS.

“She’s even begun to bridge the differences that have divided us for so long, because no matter which party you belong to, we can all agree that Michelle has the right to bare arms,” he told the crowd.

2010

Obama delivered another joke-packed speech at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner, this time with a little more sass, and some choice curse words.

“I work a lot so I wasn’t sure that I should actually come tonight. Biden talked me into it. He said, ‘Mr. President, this is no ordinary dinner. This is a big (beep) meal.”

It was a throwback to that time his VP bestie whispered (well, just spoke and loudly enough for the microphone to catch) into his ear, “This is a big fucking deal,” when Obama signed the Affordable Care Act into law that same year.

Ohhh Biden. It makes you wonder what other sweet nothings he’s been whispering into the president’s ear…

Image: alex wong/ Getty Images

2011

When it comes to Obama jokes, they’re often lighthearted, relatively non-offensive and not even really funny all quintessential elements of the standard dad joke.

But sometimes Barry likes to go rogue, like that one time in 2011 when he finally called out Donald Trump for untrue birther claims and criticisms of his presidency.

“All kidding aside, we obviously all know about your credentials and breadth of experience,” Obama said, with a stone-faced Trump hidden in the crowd. “For example seriously, just recently in an episode of Celebrity Apprentice, at the steakhouse, the mens cooking team did not impress the judges from Omaha Steaks.”

It didn’t stop there.

“And there was a lot of blame to go around. But you, Mr. Trump, recognized that the real problem was a lack of leadership,” Obama said. “So ultimately, you didnt blame Lil Jon or Meatloaf. You fired Gary Busey. And these are the kinds of decisions that would keep me up at night.

*roars of laughter and applause*

Well handled, sir.

2012

With the wild birther claims, Obama just kept making lemonade out of lemons. At the White House Correspondents’ Dinner in 2012, he delivered this gem.

“My name is Barack Obama. My mother was born in Kansas, my father was born in Kenya, and I was born, of course, in Hawaii,” he said with a solid wink, of course.

Image: leaksource.wordpress.comvia youtube.com

Oh, that’s just classic Barry.

2013

Poking fun at the haters with some satirical self-deprecation is a hallmark of Obama humor, even when tackling the tough stuff.

I look in the mirror and say, Im not the strapping young Muslim socialist that I used to be, he told the crowd at the White House Correspondents’s Association dinner.

That’s one way to clap back.

Then, showing off his more lighthearted chops at the annual Thanksgiving Turkey pardon later that year, Obama gave the presidential treatment (dad jokes included) to a turkey named Popcorn. He said the bird was just one of 80 turkeys competing for a chance to spare its life from becoming food.

Image: Getty Images

“It was, quite literally, the Hunger Games.”

He saw a little of himself in the bird named Popcorn.

“The competition was stiff, but we can officially declare that Popcorn is the winner, proving that even a turkey with a funny name can find a place in politics.”

See what he did there? Yeah, we did too. Not so sly, Obama.

2014

The dad jokes really started pouring in during the later years of Obama’s presidency, when the annual turkey pardoning became fertile grounds for embarrassing the now teenage Malia and Sasha. And what better way to do that than with some corny puns about turkeys named Mac and Cheese?

“Lets face it if youre a turkey, and youre named after a side dish your chances of escaping Thanksgiving dinner are pretty low. So these guys are well ahead of the curve. They really beat the odds.”

You can almost hear the sighs.

2015

Obama would eventually go all out with the dad jokes, and in 2015, he didn’t hold back.

Remarking on the turkey who would now be spared, Abe, he gave this bit:

“Abe is now a free bird. He is TOTUS, the Turkey of the United States.”

Image: white house via youtube.com

He then elaborated on the coming duties of Abe and his alternate, Honest.

“If for some reason Abe can’t fulfill his duties to walk around and gobble all day Honest is in an undisclosed location, ready to serve as the TOTUS in the TOTUS line of succession.”

It was a less than stellar line that managed to extract at least a little laughter from his daughters, and after the turkey gobbled, Malia even gave her father some much awaited approval: “Okay, that was funny.”

And with that, POTUS acknowledged all the bad jokes his daughters have patiently endured.

“I am going to publicly thank Malia and Sasha for once again standing here with me during the turkey pardon,” he told the crowd. “They do this solely because it makes me feel good not because they actually think that this is something I should be doing.”

2016

As he prepared for his last days in office, Obama seemed to roll up his sleeves and did quite a bit more corny joking at the final turkey pardoning. Maybe it was because he thought he could get away with it a little more easily, given Malia and Sasha skipped the ceremony that year and two of their cousins stood in instead.

Whatever the reason, it’s clear 2016 was the year Obama let loose: He unleashed at least nine different dad jokes in a less than 10-minute speech. Some highlights:

“We should also make sure everyone has something to eat on Thanksgiving, except for the turkeys because they’re already stuffed.”

“Yes we cran.”

And on the topic of ending the dad jokes once he leaves office: “No way I’m cutting this habit cold turkey.”

For Obama, the paternal puns will always be fun.

One last dad joke.

A photo posted by The White House (@whitehouse) on Jan 12, 2017 at 7:29pm PST

BONUS: The Obamas got real emotional at the president’s farewell address

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from A brief history of Obama’s corny jokes