#Harry Hart fan fic

[brinleyparke]

Kingsman Fic Ideas/Prompts

Merwin, Perciwin, Hartwin, or Gen: Charlie gets kicked out or at least punished for the water prank.

Parachute test fix-it (Merwin or Gen): Perhaps Merlin takes a minute to understand why Eggsy has said chip on his shoulder

What if Eggsy and Charlie were the last two in the parachute test?

"Manners maketh man. You'd do well to remember that Mr. Hesketh." Or Harry is none too pleased when he finds out how Charlie has been treating Eggsy. (Can be Hartwin or Harry can be more of a father figure in this)

What if Charlie had passed the loyalty test?

Harry lets Eggsy teach Dean a lesson after Eggsy fails the final test and comes home and finds out that Dean hit his mom.

Post-TGC: (Merwin or Gen) Merlin lives, but Eggsy still feels guilty. He's also angry because Merlin sacrificed himself to repay Eggsy's father, not because of Eggsy himself, which parallels Harry saying, "Can't you see that everything I've done has been about trying to repay him?" in the first Kingsman film.

AU - Canon Divergence, Enemy of My Enemy: Eggsy doesn't kill Charlie. Eggsy and Charlie have to team up against a villain, not necessarily Poppy.

Merwin or Gen: Daisy asks Merlin to dress up as Gru for Halloween so that her and Eggsy can be minions.

H/C after train track test

Maybe Eggsy is upset that he was drugged.

Maybe Eggsy has been drugged before, so he has a panic attack or a nightmare after the train test.

Maybe Eggsy is still freaked out a little because he thought he was gonna die.

Eggsy gets de-aged to 4 years old (mind and body). Harry takes care of him until they can turn him back. (GEN FIC) Based on this fanart:

Eggsy gets de-aged to 4 years old (mind and body). Merlin takes care of him until they can turn him back. (GEN FIC) Based on this fanart:

Eggsy gets de-aged to 4 years old (mind and body). Harry and Merlin take care of him until they can turn him back. (GEN or Merlahad FIC)

Eggsy gets de-aged to 4 years old (mind and body). The agents of Kingsman take turns taking care of him until they can turn him back. (GEN or Merlahad or Harry/Percival FIC)

Harry apologizes to Eggsy for what he said and the assumptions he made in the Black Prince.

Tilde tells her parents about Eggsy.

Merwin or Gen: After the toast to Merlin, Eggsy leaves the room (maybe he goes to the bathroom or something) and breaks down. Harry or Tequila or Ginger Ale comforts him.

Tilde meeting Daisy and Eggsy's mother for the first time.

Post-TGC: Eggsy has nightmares about Merlin and almost losing Tilde, and Tilde comforts him.

During training, Eggsy has nightmares about Dean.

After Merlin's "most dangerous job interview" speech, Harry explains the bruises on Eggsy's cheek and neck.

After the water test, all of the recruits receive physicals. Eggsy doesn't have much medical history because Jamal treated most of his injuries. The doctor and/or Merlin are concerned about the scars and/or broken bones or bone fractures that didn't heal properly.

"When was the last time you ate?" Or Eggsy's first meal at Kingsman. He's not particularly gross or rude about eating; he just eats very fast. Roxy or Merlin is concerned. In other words, Eggsy has food insecurity issues.

"What's his story?" Or during or after TGC: Ginger Ale or Champ is curious about Eggsy, and ask Harry what Eggsy's story is. Or maybe they ask Eggsy himself

Songfic based on "Waiting For Superman" by Daughtry about Michelle waiting for Lee to come back home even after Harry told her he was dead.

Songfic based on "Save Me" by Jelly Roll

Songfic based on "How to Save a Life" by The Fray

Eggsy meets Merlin's nephew, who is fancast as Richard Madden. They hit it off pretty well. (You can make up the name of Merlin's nephew.)

Merwin: Eggsy and Daisy convince Merlin to watch Brave with them.

Eggsy dresses up as Robin Hood for Halloween. 🔥🔥🔥🥵🥵🥵

Arrow x-over: Kingsman needs the Green Arrow's help.

Reacher (TV) x-over: Tequila tries to recruit Reacher.

Reacher (TV) x-over: Dixon or Neagley is recruited to Statesman to be the new Ginger-Ale

Supernatural x-over: While doing recon on what Kingsman believed to be a Satanistic cult, but is actually a coven, Eggsy gets de-aged to 4 years old (mind and body). Harry (or Merlin or Harry and Merlin or all of Kingsman) takes care of him until they can turn him back. Harry or Merlin knows someone in the British Men of Letters and makes some calls to get help reversing the spell. (GEN or Merlahad FIC)

Constantine (Arrowverse) x-over: While doing recon on what Kingsman believed to be a Satanistic cult, but is actually a coven, Eggsy gets de-aged to 4 years old (mind and body). Harry (or Merlin or Harry and Merlin or all of Kingsman) takes care of him until they can turn him back. Someone at Kingsman knows John Constantine and gets in contact with him to ask for his help. (GEN or Merlahad FIC)

[sitp-recs]

You're a Kingsman fan?!? That is one of my top five favorite movies! Do you do any fic for it?

Yes! I wasn’t a big fan of the sequels but the first movie is one of my favourites too 😍 I was in the fandom between 2015-2017 and luckily had a bunch of bookmarks in my old account. They’re not recent but tbh I’d rec anything from the authors below, they’re all excellent. Enjoy!

Tongue in Cheek by venvephe (E, 4k)

Eggsy's never done this before - or, to be clear, he's never had this done to him.

Squeeze by rageprufrock (E, 5.7k)

From the start, Harry’s read Eggsy all over, seen right through him, so Eggsy’s not surprised that he’s barely had time to think about how he wants to feel ruined that Harry gives it to him — just like that.

under my skin (tried so not to give in) by venvephe (E, 12k)

This is a monumentally bad idea, Eggsy realizes, in the fraction of a second between reaching out and tugging at Harry’s tie and seeing his eyes briefly widen before their lips meet.

Only As Directed by rageprufrock (E, 12k)

“Arthur is a bad man,” Roxy had said. “Fucking tell me about it,” Eggsy had muttered, and gone to put on the tarty trousers Harry had picked out for him like a fucking high-end pimp.

Class Of Conduct by fideliant (E, 12k)

Or, Six Things Eggsy Has Learned About Being A Gentleman.

all the tables turn by DivineProjectZero (E, 23k)

Harry Hart has terrible taste in men. So it comes as a bit of a surprise when Eggsy smiles at him and the predator inside Harry cocks its head in consideration.

As Men to Fear the Dark by proxydialogue (E, 25k)

After V-day, the world is a jigsaw in a tumble dryer. Nations across the world have collapsed. Kingsman itself is in shambles. Eggsy, Merlin, and Roxy are working desperately to piece everything back together, while in the shadows, mad and malicious men find footholds in the rubble, using the chaos to their advantage.

Your Highness by Galahard (E, 40k) - AU

The international community is in chaos this morning in the wake of the deaths of many world leaders. The death of the president of the United States has been confirmed, along with the majority of his cabinet. Great Britain can count itself lucky that the Queen has been found and finally returned to her throne, but her heirs are another story. It appears that both princes and their own heirs are among the casualties of what is being referred to as the Valentine’s Day Massacre. Sources close to--

the parting glass by kirkaut (E, 48k)

The words shrivel and die between them. Harry's chest hitches on an indrawn breath. The contours of his face are cast dramatically in the fiery hues of the street at night, highlighting the wrinkle in his forehead and the soft slope of his chin and the silvery pink of his scar. He's beautiful, and Eggsy loves him.

The Spy who Loved Me (Or so they say) by ToriCeratops (E, 54k)

In the wake of V-day the world’s economy hangs in a delicate balance, liable to crumble without warning. One man has the knowledge and the power necessary to send it tumbling down, so that only he remains on top.

Bon Appétit by Galahard (T, 58k) - AU

“This is actually an excellent opportunity for you. Kingsman is one of the most elite cooking schools in London, and they so rarely offer evening courses like this. The fact that they were willing to work with us and allow you to attend is a miracle.”

Once Upon a Different Lifetime by missbecky (M, 58k)

The night before the final test, Harry makes Eggsy a promise: once he is a Kingsman, they will talk about their future together. Then V-Day happens, and although Harry recovers, he doesn't remember that last day he spent with Eggsy.

[wallpaper-inside-my-heart]

💛Smoshblr December Asks Day 21💙

Top 3 tropes in media/fanfic

So in terms of general concepts/tropes I enjoy in all media, there def any iteration of (Enemies/Rivals to) Friends to Lovers; then Found Family <3 and hurt/comfort -> especially in combo with one of the other two tropes!

When in comes to which types of fanfics I specifically seek out most of the time:

(putting these answers and the fanfic recs under the cut, cause this is once again getting way longer than I intended)

I know this is super unpopular, but I love well done miscommunication in fanfics! Hate it in most movies tho!!

-> also what I think constitutes “good” miscommunication basically boils down to “ is the miscommunication plot or character motivated?” cause in a lot of media the miscommunication feels forced and only meant to prolong or escalate the story

-> but if the miscommunication happens bc the characters are, for example, insecure about sharing certain info/feelings it is way more captivating and relatable (to me)

-> so this is ofc directly related to (Mutual) Pining <3 (plus also connected to another fave of mine: Memory Loss/Amnesia & also secret identity)

2. Forced proximity!!

-> I’m counting both sharing a bed and stuff like fake relationship under this umbrella

-> I just love when characters are forced to interact with each other in a different and typically more intimate way than they usually do! (and what it reveals about themselves and their relationship to eachother!)

3. Fix-it fanfics

-> I actually love original stories that have tragic endings! But there are many ways a story can end in a disappointing way and make me immeditaly turn to what all the wonderful fanfic authors have come up with in order to clean up the mess!

I have way too many favourite fanfics tbh... SO I'm actually gonna do both general and smosh ones I enjoyed a lot recently!

Multifandom (I am a huge podfic girlie, so I'm gonna give them a shoutout here!)

Harry Hart and the Honey Pot: An Indiana Jones Adventure - reena_jenkins, samanthahirr - Kingsman (Movies) [Archive of Our Own] -> I love me a good movie based AU from time to time and the kingsman fandom has so many great writers!

2. [podfic] tomorrow will always and forever now be today (tomorrow is our always and forever) - Matriaya - 9-1-1 (TV) [Archive of Our Own] -> this fic changed me as a person istg; like it is such an incredibly well done take on the timeloop trope, I'm-

3. Be My Savior - Chapter 1 - jessebee - Supernatural [Archive of Our Own] -> this is me coming out as lowkey more of a Sabriel than Destiel fan 🙈 Like ofc Destiel have the better canon story, and I do love them very much; However Sabriel fanfics captured my heart when I was a teenager and are still hanging on by a thread! (also I can still make myself cry instantly via a headcanon I created for them ages ago and that's gotta count for smth 😹)

Smosh Fanfics &lt;3

In general of course any and all fics by Katie @jovenshires 🩷🩵 (love you and your writing to death istg🫶) but having to choose one for this, I'm gonna go with right where you left me - jovenshires (imdeansgirl) - Smosh [Archive of Our Own]

2. doing something like this right on the first try - halfwheeze - Smosh [Archive of Our Own] my most recent bookmark and 100% my fave fic I've read these past few weeks! But Mer 🖤💜@tommybowefuneralattendee has so many banger fanfics, it was super hard to choose! <3 But this fic made me truly ship nintendogs, so it deserves this mention

3. I abstained from choosing any of the amazing spommy fics by the lovely ppl I mentioned above, bc I might have spommy brainworms 24/7, but I cannot lose my multishipper rep! 😹🙈 But here is one of my other fave spommy fics from a different author! maybe my animals live in your zoo - creepysounds - Smosh [Archive of Our Own] edit: by the lovely @tommybones 🫶

[fuckyeahharryhart]

FAN FIC: PART 7 KINGSMAN III: REDACTED

SUMMARY: A familiar face shows up at Kingsman. They discuss the possibility of a new adversary threatening the future of Kingsman.

WORD COUNT: 4800

Might be less developed as other chapters. I suck at plot.

------

A tall, decidedly handsome man pushed open the double doors of Kingsman Tailor Shop and strode in as if he owned the place. It was a possibility not to discount as he was dressed almost identically as the Kingsman agents. However, there was something quite different about this gentleman. His distinction had more to do with his bearing, the way he walked, the way he swaggered and less to do with his black leather cowboy boots and his silver flask belt buckle. Though these deviations from Kingsman’s regulation attire were noted. He seemed to take up more space, even though the shop was empty at the time. He was taller than Eggsy, but not quite reaching the heights of Harry, even with his heeled boots. And while Harry carried himself with a subtle, lean and long masculine grace, this man was robust and brawny. His build was closer to Eggsy’s, broad in the shoulders, strong and sturdy. Just taller. Bigger.

The man paused at the reception desk. Drove the pointed, business end of a Kingsman umbrella, the ferrule, onto the hardwood floor. He clutched the grip with both hands and announced his presence, while planting himself with his cowboy boots a little wider than hips width distance apart.

“Tell ‘em in the back that Agent Tequila’s here.” He hollered.

Aside from the smaller details, his voice was the identifying factor. The man announced his presence with a deep, masculine southern drawl. The accent had the formality of Received Pronunciation, but with a twist from across the pond.

He was Agent Tequila, from the United States. He arrived at Kingsman London to assist after the events of The Golden Circle depleted the Kingsman’s ranks. And because Champagne “Champ”, the head of Statesman, their U.S. counterpart, believed some time spent with the good ‘ole boys of Kingsman would add a little class and sophistication to the rough around the edges, but otherwise adept agent.

Tequila, on the other hand, regarded this stint as an opportunity, if not to corrupt the ranks of Kingsman, at the very least, shake ‘em up a bit. Loosen ‘em up. It didn’t have to be suits and ties ALL the time.

His own reflection caught his eye in one of the dressing mirrors and he gave himself a wink. He did have to admit that he carried the suit well and he did look mighty damn fine.  

Not a bad toss up for being a little less comfortable in his Levis and his snap button shirts. He did find himself missing his cowboy hat. The rounded felt hat from the London hat-makers Thomas and William Bowler, felt stuffy and small compared to his Stetson. Granted, it did have an older history in 1849, compared to 1865, but not by much. He was assured that the bowler, in conjunction with the rolled brolly, what they called an umbrella, was the look of a proper city gentleman. He still figured southerners could hold their own when you got right down to it. In the meantime, as long as they didn’t put a bur in his saddle, everything should be fine as paint. No sale on the cowboy boots and the belt buckle. Getting citified only went so far. But otherwise, he reckoned, when in Rome.

The door to one of the dressing rooms swung open and Eggsy stepped out. An odd place to be waiting, seeing that he wasn’t with a client. How the hells long as he been in there, he thought.

Tequila lifted a chin in his direction.

“Well, you got here faster than a one-legged man in an ass-kicking competition -”

He cut himself off when a second person followed him out of the room. Not a client, curiously, but a young woman he had never seen before. Her attire was similar to Kingsman agents, but not exactly. She was dressed in a slim skirt and suit set, a navy Prince of Wales check. Just as their suits were cut to fit a man’s shape, hers was cut to enhance the lines of a more feminine figure. Just as precise, just as exacting. Rather than a men’s dress shirt, she wore a feminine silk blouse with ruffled detailing. Rather than a tie, she had a silk scarf of the same pattern tied around the low bun holding her hair. Her black patent Mary Janes gave another several inches to her already tall height. She made really quite the fetching picture.

Well, there go my manners, Tequila thought.

Eggsy decided it was in all of their best interests if he took care of the introductions, just in case the brash southerner was about to come up with something that sounded slightly insulting. He wasn’t quite sure what to do with his particular curious vernacular just yet. And Eggsy didn’t trust him enough not to say something offensive.

“Agent Tequila, I would like you to meet Gwendolyn Mycroft.” he gestured to the woman who stood next to him, “She is one of Kingsman’s newest additions.”

“Gwendolyn, this is Agent Tequila, he is part of Statesman, our equivalent agency based in the United States. I believe you are familiar with it.”

Eggsy stopped himself. He didn’t quite think it was an appropriate time or in good taste to mention she knew Statesman because she hacked into their computer’s mainframe and then watched her father die.

Gwendolyn held out her hand politely, with an inscrutable expression. It was the way she greeted all unknowns until she was able to form her opinion.

“Pleasure to meet you, Agent Tequila.” she responded properly.

Eggsy wanted to cringe when he saw Tequila take her hand and promptly kiss the back of it.

“The pleasure is all mine, Miss Mycroft.” He drawled. Gwendolyn began to pull her hand back a fraction before he let it go. If she was amused or offended by his gesture, she didn’t let it show.

At least it wasn’t a double air cheek kiss, Eggsy thought. He continued. “Agent Tequila is also here to help us establish the foundation of the new Kingsman.”

Tequila, in Gwendolyn’s direction. “I guess you’re here to do the same.”

Her expression still hadn’t shifted. But her eyes had yet to leave Agent Tequila’s face.

Eggsy spoke for her. “Yes, she is also helping in Field work, Strategy as well as Research and Development.”

“Well don’t you sound as smart as all get out.” Tequila said as a compliment. “Why don’t you join us while Eggsy gives me a tour of this joint?”

Eggsy noticed that Gwendolyn’s expression had not changed a single bit since she first saw the agent from the south. And with Tequila pouring on more charm than usual, he was sure it was going to make for an interesting time at Kingsman. As he invited the agent to take a tour of the shop, he was suddenly very glad that he was married.

——

With the financial support of their new Kingsman distillery and additional backing from Statesman, they were able to begin the rebuild of the shop, ancillary locations and warehouses, though it would still be years until they were able to match the previous Kingsman’s massive collection of artillery, technology, and properties. Kingsman had been steeped in history. Many objects of historical significance they had lost were irreplaceable. But its complete destruction allowed them the opportunity to separate the wheat from the chafe, the good from the bad, to let go of archaic traditions that no longer held significance or value, and prioritise where their main focus should lie.

Reconstructing the Kingsman’s front was one of those top priorities. The tailor shop was running smoothly again, fashioning first rate bespoke menswear as it had prior to the explosions. Kingsman agents were supplied with new suits with fresh bulletproof lining. A new collection of accoutrements accompanied each agent. They prioritized the shop,  as well as rebuilding their armoury and weapons cache.

As long as the agents had their Kingsman armour and the accessories that completed the look, they were mission ready. The rest would be replaced in time. Historical buildings and 100 year old scotch couldn’t protect the world from all the horrible things men did to each other. It was the knights, the brave and honourable men and women that made up the ranks of Kingsman, that would carry on the ultimate mission of their organization, to uphold peace and protect life.

The Kingsman suit didn’t make the man, but the agents definitely embodied the suits as well as every gentleman spy should.  And being a gentleman spy was a matter of being four things. They were polite. They were courteous. They were well mannered. And they had a plan to kill everyone in the room at any given time.

———-

Gwendolyn’s appearance came, by chance, at the most fortuitous moment. While a drive-by shooting was not the most elegant tactic to remove players from the board, if done properly, it was effective. Fast and fatal with little fuss.  With less chance for blowback, but common enough where the news of a drive by shooting was not likely to stir the interest of the authorities other than to increase patrol and warn residents to take precaution.  

Most likely this kind of shooting would be treated as an anomaly. An unfortunate, one-of incident. It also kept agencies such as theirs, from raising alert to a possible threat.

The modus operandi of low life thugs and gangs that did not have enough sophistication for tradecraft, drive-by shootings usually had three purposes, as a warning, to take out a rival, or an initiation of a new member. It was doubtful that Kingsman was the target of a local gang. But sometimes gangs freelanced for those with more power.

Gwendoyn mentioned that it was quite possible that whomever or whatever wanted them out of the picture had outsourced or contracted the job. It would pose even less risk for the controlling party. On the other hand, anytime an organization no longer took care of wet work “in-house” there was always the possibility for indiscretion, for leaks. There was no honor amongst thieves for these kinds of criminals. The only means to motivate them was either through money or power or the fear of losing both.

If this adversary wanted Kingsman off the board, they had power and influence that went deep. Eggsy mentioned if they were able to identify both Harry and himself, have access to their schedule and whereabouts for any given day, that meant they had the resources for hi-tech surveillance. Setting up counter-surveillance should take precedence.

Not necessarily, Gwendolyn had pointed out. Sure it was time consuming and repetitive, but she was able to surveil the same, determine the same schedule, gather the same intel just by physical reconnaissance. Even though she had been a near constant presence for two weeks, she had not raised any suspicions. She was there, expecting Harry and Eggsy, just as the vehicle was. There was no sense setting up hi- tech counter surveillance if the adversary wasn’t using high technology surveillance to begin with.

Sometimes, low-tech, low-fi, the least expected method was the one that was used BECAUSE of it’s near obsolescence.  Gwendolyn emphasized that they shouldn’t rely just on tech to determine who the enemy was. Curious since one of her main strengths was in tech, but her father had always emphasised not to let her talents and skills become a crutch. A good agent looked at all angles of a problem, not just the angle that gave her the best view.

The Golden Circle left a large void in the criminal world that needed to be filled. Luckily, for Kingsman, that meant a lot of in-house fighting and attempts to gain power. Deals and alliances were made and broken. Backs were stabbed. Retribution was had. As challenging as it was to broker a deal in legitimate business matters, it was exponentially more risky when you were dealing with individuals who robbed, lied and killed for a living.

——

On an average London afternoon, slightly cloudy and overcast, with an occasional peek of sunshine through the clouds, Kingsman debated matters of life and death.

They were all seated at the long table in the new dining room, discussing the new threat. The table consisted of Gwendolyn, Agent Tequila, Galahad Sr. and Galahad Jr. They really had to do something about those codenames. But apparently, the name had significance to both Harry and Eggsy and neither of them was ready to give up the handle.

Ever since the betrayal of long-standing agents in both organizations, Chester King, the Arthur that betrayed Harry and Kingsman, and the discovery of Agent Whiskey as a traitor in Statesman, and of course, the destruction of Kingsman and all of its agents, they were taking more care of who was on a need to know basis.  In this case, the circle was a small one. Harry and Eggsy, since they were the targets, Gwendolyn for obvious reasons, and Agent Tequila, whose fresh eyes might be able to discern nuances they had overlooked. It was just as well the group was small. The other remaining active Kingsman were all in the field on other assignments. Everyone was having to do more with less.

Gwendolyn was seated at the head of this small gathering, not that she was taking up the mantle of Arthur. Since she was present at the time of the shooting, had reconnoitred the area and had the most actionable intel so far, she was assigned monitor for this little conference.  It was one of her first times leading a meeting at Kingsman. Herding cats seemed suddenly very relatable.  She was never one to be nervous or doubt her abilities, but the presence of three alpha males, each with strong personalities and convictions, two whose lives could depend on the conversation, kept her at the top of her game.

They were discussing the possibilities when Gwendolyn surmised.

“The way I see it, we are all agreed this was not a random shooting.”

Harry nodded. With his brow drawn together in concentration,  he was listening intently. Eggsy, twiddling his pen, was still pissed that they hadn’t even had a chance to return fire at the tossers. Agent Tequila was staring at Gwendolyn, throwing her a wink every time she glanced in his direction.

She chose to ignore everyone except Harry.

She was cautious not to let her gaze rest on him too long. Despite their evening together in the lounge, Harry treated her exactly the same as he always had. Helpful and kind. Still critical in moments where he knew she could do better. Supportive when he needed to be. He didn’t distance himself in any way. He was comfortable at her side, lightly touching her shoulder, her hand, her back when it was appropriate. If anything, she was modifying her own behaviour. She was careful not to touch him first or stand too close.  If she knew he was nearby or heard his footsteps, with his stride long and purposeful, her body would tense and her heart would beat faster as he approached.

If her eyes wandered and accidentally caught his gaze, he would throw her a wink and the tiniest hint of a smile before she had the chance to look away.  This new twinkle was the only change that she noticed. She had to struggle not to blush every time she saw it. She was determined not to blush in front of these three agents. She spoke clearly and with authority.

“This was a very specific attempt to hit very specific targets. In cases where low-fi is used, it is typically implemented when the actual adversary is either extremely powerful, well known, or technologically advanced, perhaps all three and therefore, wants to avoid using their own resources so they can remain unknown.”

“What about catching the perps?” suggested Eggsy, who still wanted to deliver a job to the face to someone, at the very least.

“The chances of apprehending the actual shooters is slim, but we can still approach that angle.”

She thought for a moment, then added.

“Perhaps we can give them an incentive to inform on their employer. However, I’m sure they have been threatened in the extreme to NOT cooperate with anyone seeking their information. In any case, we may be wasting time looking at a dead end.”

Her father had always looked at the bigger picture and she concentrated on doing the same.  

“What I find most suspicious, is the lack of direct, beneficial outcome resulting in the elimination of the targets.”, she said seriously. She was searching for the improbable.

“Thanks, yeah, for putting it so warmly.” Eggsy said, vaguely amused.

She raised her eyebrows a him, shaping her face into someone that should not be interrupted.

Agent Tequila offered his view point. It wasn’t very helpful, either.

“Seems like someone just wants to get rid of Kingsman. That’s one long ass streak of bad luck.” He shook his head. “Sorry boys, it looks like ya’ll got a lot of folks who wanna see you go down.”

Gwendolyn circled the conversation back to the topic at hand.

“What I mean is, what’s the goal?”

“Eh, to kill us, obviously.” Eggsy said pointedly, looking at the others for agreement. He leaned back in his chair. He assumed that was evident.

“Of course.” Gwendolyn explained with more patience than she felt.

“That’s the action.” She added, questioning, “What is the equal and opposite reaction that they are expecting to achieve?”

She focused on Harry and Eggsy.

“The two of you are obviously integral to Kingsman, but as someone who has been part of the beating heart of these kinds of agencies, they’re going about it the wrong way.”

“How so?” asked Harry. At least he was being encouraging.

“If your goal is to disable an organization, you don’t get rid of the players in the field.” She explained.

“You take out a source of power, such as information, communications. You wipe out their computer system, or target their armoury, or drain their funds. If you are going to take someone off the board, you take out the person who controls access. Sabotage. Make them inoperable, so that no matter how many men they have, no matter how large their army, they are not able to fight. They no longer have means of support.”

At the mention of sabotoge, armoires, wiping out systems, the other two men listened to her with increasing interest.

“That leaves the adversary free to continue their illegal activities without interruption. Not having to deal with threats gives them more resources for whatever generates them money and or power.”

“Not to offend, but after the beating the agency took after V-Day and the absolute knock out from The Golden Circle, most of your efforts have been on regrouping, rebuilding, reestablishing Kingsman’s presence. Kingsman has been mostly laying low. If you were on a revenge list, or you had an enemy that wanted to destroy Kingsman for good, that would have been the most opportune time. While the agency was at its weakest.”

She paused, making sure the men were both paying attention and following her train of thought. Her mind was working on all the possibilities. Experience told her that this was not a simple case of retribution. She was narrowing in on her point.

“Taking out two random agents - “

Eggsy drew back his head and balked, “Beg your pardon. Random?”

Even Harry looked vaguely offended.

Male egos, Gwendolyn thought.

“No offence meant of course. But, ultimately, when you get to the crux of it, in the end you are both agents. Exceptional agents, without a doubt. But taking out two agents, without a focused skill that the organisation’s structure relies on, has no point.”

“Unless,” she said, “that IS the point.”

Now the three agents all had the similar look of confusion on their faces. Three sets of furrowed brows and narrowed eyes turned toward her for clarification.

“Assassination.” She arrived at her point and from here, she was thinking out loud as much as presenting them with information.

Harry was intrigued and nodded slightly to himself. Eggy looked equally surprised and thoughtful. Even Tequila stopped looking at her as if she were a county fair ride he wanted to hop on and started to look involved.

“Assassination has two main purposes. To take out a political figure, a head of state, to disrupt the flow of command. Or, to demoralise the people under their leadership. In your case, you’ve already lost your head of state twice in the past two years.”

She turned to Harry.

“Harry, you’re not even officially Arthur. In fact, Kingsman is yet to designate a permanent head of state. Eliminating that position would do little to disrupt your chain of command. That logic is flawed.”

She continued to clear her path of reasoning, sifting the crucial from the non-essential.

“What’s left?” She asked.

“To demoralise the soldiers?” She made a point of looking around at the empty chairs.

“What soldiers? Most of your agency was destroyed, the agents killed. There are only a handful of working agents who are all out in the field. Most of them are not even in contact until their mission is complete. I have the feeling that we could all be blown up again and those agents would just continue on with their daily operations.”

“That’s lovely.” murmured Eggsy.

“It’s true, though.” Harry said in support.  Most of the agents in the field, the few that they had, were more than capable of handling their missions on their own with little support from HQ.

She leaned back into her chair until they were all awaiting her to continue. Assassination, was an interesting motive, aside from the actual killing and dying aspect.

“Another reason for an assassination,” she was honing the idea in her mind as she was speaking,  “Is to show the power of the organisation behind the killing.”

Her eyes narrowed as she circled her conclusion.

“I believe this was a show.” Her voice was low, secure with her words. Not too dissimilar from a gang initiation ritual, she thought.

“I theorise that this was an attempt of an organisation who has newly arrived into power. They are solidifying their new position by making a statement and asserting dominance over their rivals.”

The men began to shift in their seats, uncomfortable at the thought of a new powerful adversary.

“Please, gentleman. Hear me out.”

At the sound of being addressed gentleman, all three agents straightened up and, with respect, gave Gwendolyn their attention. There were some benefits of being a lady in a room full of men.

“What both of you are,” she said, speaking to both of the Galahads, “is venerated in the intelligence community and feared by the network of criminals around the world.”

She turned toward the younger, brash agent by Harry’s side. “Eggsy, you almost single handedly took out Richmond Valentine and stopped V-Day from being the world catastrophe that it could have been.”

He shrugged, a rare show of modesty for him. Though Gwendolyn had an inkling that he was being facetious. The shrug was more in the lines of “Who, what? Me? Nah, it was nothin.”

Now she turned to the older of the two. Fully engaged in the subject matter, Gwendolyn did not let her eye contact falter this time.

“Harry is part of spy lore now. Let all alone all that he’s done in the course of his career. And then to have survived Valentine’s bullet to the face? Essentially cheated death and to return in time to thwart the largest global hostage situation in history? With Eggsy? Of course, all missions are covet. Classified.  But word gets around through underground channels. For those on either side of good or evil. They must be aware of your existence. They’ve heard of your missions. They might not know exactly who you are, but apparently someone does.”

Harry, in his own dignified manner, accepted the compliments as a matter of fact.

“After the collapse of the Golden Circle, what better opportunity for those in the underworld to try to make a grab for power? It was all of their infighting that allowed you the time and space to rebuild. It seems like their restructuring is in place. Now, whoever has filled the void, needs to establish the new pecking order.  What better way than to take out the two most recognisable agents from one of the oldest, most respected agencies?” She asked the men rhetorically.

Gwendolyn knew what action needed to be taken.

“We need to know who the new power players are.” She said firmly.

The timing was outstanding. “Now what is the be all and end all, of all Galas?  Where only the richest, the most famous, and the most powerful go to see and be seen. THE event that not only national governments around the world use to network, but also the leaders that work underground, through less legitimate channels?

Harry and Eggsy looked at each other. They came to the same conclusion.

“The Monarch’s Ball.” They both said.

“Exactly.” Gwendolyn said emphatically.

“Sounds like a party.” Agent Tequila added.

This time, Harry, Eggsy and Gwendolyn confirmed simultaneously.

“It is.”

----

Thanks for hanging in there! Some chapters may be better than others....

[perksofbeingatallpotato]

Kingsman: The Mushy Pea

Harry Hart x Reader Request Warnings: None Word Count: 645 A/N: I began working on this two years ago. Hello anon, terribly sorry. Writer's block. Survived mild covid. Still surviving life and all the other stuff. I wanted this to be really cute and fluffy, that's probably why I kept putting it off and why it took me this long. Hope you guys will like it despite it being short. Let me know. Request: “Oh yay! Great! Can you please do a Harry Hart x reader where the kingsman have lunch together all the time and he finds out he's in love with her when she laughed at that one time he had a "single mushy pea on the brim of his spectacles"? Please make it a fluffy end. It's based on a kingsman red carpet interview about colin being a messy eater dressed perfectly and all, and I love that little flaw. It's cute. Thanks.”

It's not every day that all Kingsman agents are sent out on missions, there are days when you just have to clock in, do a bit of office work, and clock out as if working a normal day job.

There were even times when you tried to pretend to be an actual tailor and hang around the shop, but in reality, you were checking out the fabrics you want for your next suit. By the third time you did it, the tailors knew what you were up to, but they didn’t say a word, maybe they loved having you around.

Sometimes, you'd even pop by Merlin's office and annoy the hell out of that Scotsman until he kicks you out, or be a useful side-kick and help him oversee a mission.

Most days like this seem slow when you're used to all the action out on the field. It is kind of boring waiting around for something to blow up or a terrorist to come out of hiding and the sorts.

The highlight of a normal day at Kingsman is eating lunch together with the other agents. Sharing a meal, exchanging stories that aren't classified, and chatting about current events give everyone a sense of normalcy in this otherwise extraordinary line of work. Though the discussions are usually centered on Eggsy's antics and embarrassing moments, because, well, he's always the first one brave enough to share his mishaps.

Today's lunch was fish and chips. Roxy was out on a mission, so it was just you, Eggsy, Percival, and Harry at the table. You often take a seat between Eggsy and Roxy, across from the senior agents. It wasn't intentional, there are no factions, you all just kind of got used to this seating arrangement.

Once the food was served, everyone started digging in. It could be the gloomy weather, or they went on a sparring session at the gym because no one hasn't said a word yet.

Harry was sitting across from you, gulping down his plate. A perfectly-dressed man, posh and all, eating as if his life depends on finishing everything on his plate.

After a few spoonful, you looked at him and noticed something. It took you a while, but a wide grin spread across your face when you figured out what it was.

You broke the silence by laughing at Harry.

Of course, he looked at you and raised his eyebrows.

This caught Eggsy and Percival's attention, they looked at you, puzzled. When your laugh finally died down, you pointed out that there was a mushy pea perched on the brim of Harry’s spectacles. And they laughed at it too.

Harry Hart, the epitome of a perfect gentleman, a messy eater.

Who would have ever thought?

Despite being the center of attention, he smiled at you. Suddenly, he felt like butterflies were fluttering inside his stomach.

As someone who once aspired to be a lepidopterist, he knew that it was impossible, but he was sure that what he felt at that moment was real.

He shrugged, "I eat like a warthog." And then he laughed along with the group.

Harry took off his glasses to remove the mushy pea and smiled again at you.

You turned back at your plate, as did the others. Harry then went on to explain how he is used to inhaling his food because, for him, he could taste it better that way rather than eating it slowly.

You laughed, "isn't that the opposite of how our sense of taste works?”

He just chuckled in response.

Harry suddenly felt tongue-tied. It was at that moment that he knew that all he wanted to do is to make you laugh, so he could hear it over and over again, and to make you happy, for the rest of his life.

And that's what he set on to do.

[killaren]

Please don’t repost! my IG: @mirmaidsgraphics

[elrhiarhodan]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Kingsman (Movies) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Gary "Eggsy" Unwin, Harry Hart | Galahad, Merlin (Kingsman), Roxy Morton | Lancelot, Percival (Kingsman) Additional Tags: Christmas fic, Too Many 1960s Television References, Harry Hart is a Little Shit, BAMF Merlin, Merlin is a Little Shit (Kingsman), Not Kingsman: The Golden Circle Compliant, Kingsman Family, POV Eggsy Unwin, Eggsy Unwin is a Little Shit, everyone is a little shit, Ugly Holiday Sweaters, Completely Unrealistic Technology, Kingsman Backstory, Eggsy's sad backstory

Summary:  Eggsy returns from a long holiday in New Zealand, visiting with his mum and Daisy, when he gets a top-level secure message to report to Sublevel Twelve, Room Twenty-Five at HQ. Despite the lack of sleep and horrific jet lag, Eggsy has no choice but to comply. Harry meets him at the lifts and takes him to a very special room where some very special Kingsman work is done.

Author’s Notes: For @anarchycox, for a prompt:  "Merlin running the most terrifyingly organized secret santa event ever, like everyone is sure that they will die if they spill who they have or break the rules, but his people will have a magical christmas surprise or else." This was a great jumping off point for something that went quite a bit differently, but I hope they enjoy it.

[kfawkes]

Promise - [Eggsy Unwin x Reader]

[AHHH THIS WAS SO FUCKING MUCH FUN HOLY SHIT lol. This is sorta like a TGC sequel…. kinda??? Sorta, lol with a fix it where everyone is happy lol. But its angsty af too because yes. :) Hope you like it anon!!!! Also hope you like the end I worked hard on that for you lol. As usual the codename Tristan is used for you :)

Pairing: Eggsy x Reader with Roxy, Merlin AND Harry lol. I had fun with this one.

Words: 3.1K I am so sorry hahahaha

Warnings: Cursing, angst, sorta spoilers but not really?

— Read on Ao3!]

“You can’t actually be suggesting that we don’t tell her. This is her fi—” Roxy started, quite loudly might you add.

“Of course not, but she doesn’t need t—“

Roxy was standing across from Merlin, and he seemed to have been just as affected by whatever the hell was happening. You clearly had walked in on a moment, a tense one at that. And by the shift in air and cascade of silence as you stepped forward, you had a feeling just who the ‘her’ in question was.

But… what the fuck were they talking about?

Roxy took an uneasy step from Merlin, pulling her top lip between her teeth as she slid her slender fingers to her hips; unable to look at you. Merlin behaved just as suspiciously, shuffling his weight and pulling a hand across his chin while he absently tapped his notepad to his thigh.

It was hard for you to talk at first, and not knowing what was happening didn’t help one bit. One thing you did know was that you really didn’t like when people talked about you… especially when the conversation was heated and/or involved not telling you something.

Before you spoke you sent out a soft smile; one not nearly as convincing as you wanted it to be as you crossed your arms. “Tell me what?”

Neither of them had even tried denying you were their subject; but after a moment they both slid their eyes to yours almost guiltily as if on queue. Roxy gritted her teeth before stepping towards you, twiddling her fingers anxiously at her navel.

“What?” When you spoke this time, you didn’t bother masking your confusion and near engulfing anger. Those nerves sent their familiar prickle of anxiety through you so strongly it tingled clear to your fingertips, and you needed to know what was going on. “What is it?”

“Eggsy… He-there’s been… something happened during the mission.” Roxy’s brows were dark, and so were her pale amber eyes.

“Wh… what do y—,” You paused to swallow down the lump that began forming in your throat as your mouth went dry. Moving your eyes from Roxy to Merlin’s offered no sense of comfort, and his were much darker than hers had been… Now as you finish he wasn’t even able to even look at you anymore. “What happened?”

Neither of them offered their response, and your eyes immediately began filling with warm tears; they pressed ferociously at your lids begging for release. “He’s… Eggsy’s okay, right? He— there w-was an accident, he—he’s hurt… bu-but he’s okay, he’s fine… right?”

But you knew by the look they sent you that Eggsy was anything but ‘fine’.

“He’s not…” You breathed lightly trying to ground yourself as you leaned back on Merlin’s desk.

Roxy stepped forward again, attempting to place a hand to your shoulder, but you pulled back forcefully. You weren’t mad at her, of course you weren’t… But you knew what that touch meant and you didn’t want to believe it— you wouldn’t.

Only, by the way she looked at you as she shook her head softly, you knew you couldn’t deny it.

Those eyes of hers were so heavy and full of despair; and in that second it felt like a bomb had been dropped atop your head. You couldn’t hear anything… you couldn’t see anything, there was just a dull persistent ringing clanging in your otherwise still mind.

“No. There– it’s not possible.” You began shaking your head profusely standing in protest; the denial setting in, sinking its teeth into your worried flesh. And now you were losing your balance as the sickly feeling stuck to you like tree sap.

You were so light headed, so fucking confused that you nearly forgot where you were. The tears weren’t gentle, but coursing and pouring with a vengeance and all you could see were flashes of his face…

Flashes of black and Eggsy’s smile…

Another flash of darkness began creeping, poisoning your mind and vision as you nearly felt his hands sliding up your neck and into your hair…

Then all you could hear was dull ringing in the silence; the voices of your friends and coworkers were muffled and echoing as if in the distance…

“No… please no.”

———

It’s quite… it’s so damn quiet.

It’s been this way since you lost Eggsy and all you felt was emptiness. Deep, dark, emptiness and part of you wondered if this would ever get better.

Since Eggsy died, you had trouble doing the simplest things. Everything you did was a chore. Breathing was a chore, eating was a chore… Even the things you loved were hard for you to do, and you knew it wasn’t right. That he wouldn’t want you to rot away alongside him wherever the hell that was…

But you couldn’t help it. There just didn’t seem to be a point anymore as terrible as that sounds. And if there was? You were having a hard time seeing it lately.

You’d never loved anything the way you loved Eggsy, and not having a body to bury made everything that much worse. It was like you couldn’t find closure… because as crazy as it sounds, without a body there was still a chance he could be alive, wasn’t there?

Eggsy would never give up on you, you couldn’t give up on him. Even though you knew, deep down you knew… it was pointless.

All you could hear right now is Eggsy promising you he’d always make it back to you. That you’d never be alone…

Funny enough… you were alone, and that’s exactly how you felt.

And that just made things harder to accept. It was hard to accept that the only person you ever loved was gone forever. That someone could be here one day, and just… gone the next. That everything you admired and cared for had just been erased suddenly; like wiping a fucking computer. Reduced to a name on a tombstone and a bunch of fucking pictures and memories too painful to revisit.

It was hard to move on when you had someone like Eggsy showing you just how special you were… Showing you everyday that you were meant to be his. That he was it: your end game.

It’d been 6 months, and it still felt fresh every morning you woke in that bed; cold and alone. A painful reminder that you lost everything locked around your ring finger, unspoken vows and broken promises… But you had to try to be a person, didn’t you? If not for yourself, at least for Eggsy.

So today, like all days you rolled over lazily— exhausted even though you’d slept at least 10 hours. The funny thing about being depressed was that you could sleep as much as you wanted, but you still woke up just as tired. Or… maybe that wasn’t funny now that you thought about it.

You eyed the empty space beside you with heavy eyelids, curling your lips into a pained frown. The wound reopening and poring its fresh blood across you and for a second you could almost see Eggsy there again… Laying shirtless on his stomach; with his broad shoulders hiding the lower half of his face, his arms stuffed under his pillow effortlessly… That golden crown of hair every which way from the night before, and his restful slumber shining in the sunlight.

You reached your hand out, wanting to feel his warmth there, but you only felt emptiness instead. The cold, crisp reminder that he was really gone and like a wave it overtook you once more. Pulling you into its wild current and you couldn’t breathe.

And as the feelings take you over, you shoved your face into his pillow almost desperately. It still smelled like him, but if you kept this shit up it wouldn’t for much longer and that scared you.

JB and Prince noticed your fit, but of course they did… Within seconds they both began licking your face and the fingers you draped over it affectionately. They missed Eggsy almost as much as you did, that much was clear but they didn’t understand where he went the way you did… how could they?

You wiped your eyes with the long sleeves of his button up, throwing your heavy arms around them both, pulling them tightly into a hug.

“I’m sorry you guys…” You whispered into JB’s head as you pressed kisses to both of them.

You were half ready to just call in today… let Roxy and Harry deal with whatever needed to be done while you ate a tub of lavender ice cream while crying and watching some romantic movie with a happy ending. But when you looked at your phone and read the message across the screen, you felt a strange trickle rushing through you.

MESSAGES

Merlin

‘It’s urgent. Bring JB.’

———

When you made it to Kingsman things felt… weird. Off. Like something wasn’t right. But it wasn’t every day your coworkers asked you to bring in your dead fiancés dog to work, so clearly something was up.

The message alone was enough to get you out of the house in less than 10 minutes, but considering you basically gave up on personal care or looking– well, not dead, that was close to your average nowadays.

When you pushed through the doors of the shop Merlin, Roxy and Harry were all there clearly awaiting your arrival. As you stepped closer they all stood anxiously and you felt it like a truck had slammed into your chest at full speed.

“What the hell is this… is this an intervention or something? Cause if it is, I’m goi—” You started taking a defensive step towards the door as you pull JB closer to your chest protectively.

“No, Tristan… It’s nothing like that.” Roxy started shaking her head with brows lowered. The look she wore was one you didn’t know so well and it made you more nervous than you were before.

“Then… what is it like? This is— kinda… weird don’t you think?” You were rather uneasy and talking faster than you wanted to be, but seriously just… what the fuck was this?

“We… we have something to show you.” Merlin cleared his throat before talking, his hand held his other wrist tightly. “Try not to… be alarmed if you can manage.”

Harry just sent you a soft smile lowering his head slightly in a nod; and you tried to read the expression behind his eye, but his too was nearly impossible to understand.

“Okay… what?” You breathed out with chest heaving tenaciously. JB was beginning to wrestle about in your arms, so you dropped him to your feet lightly.

“Do you remember when Eggsy and I found Harry… How he didn’t really know who he was?” Merlin asked raising his brows at you passively releasing his grip on his wrist as he signal towards Harry.

“Yeah, of course. What about it?” You asked tossing them all a quick glance, feeling as though you were late and seriously unprepared for a performance. “What are you trying to say…”

You didn’t realize it at first with how overwhelmed you were feeling, but Harry had left the room.

Merlin was talking still, but now you weren’t listening… Instead you were watching as Harry walked slowly down the stairs tucked behind the register. You listened as a second set of feet made their way behind him… Your eyes followed as JB ran from your side and up the stairs, barking excitedly.

All you could see were two legs in a pair of bright white adidas. After a moment two arms kneeled down to pet him and your breath was so fast, that you felt like your heart was seconds away from bursting through your chest; Aliens style.

But you just watched anxiously as the hands lifted JB up, and continued their decent down the steps leisurely…

Time itself was moving so slowly that it felt like everything had almost stopped and you didn’t know what to expect… what you’d see…

But when the man reached the base of the stairs… it was Eggsy, just like you knew it would be.

He was there, just standing and looking from Roxy to Harry, then ending on Merlin… Smiling wide and pure as JB licked his face excitedly.

Tears filled your eyes immediately, and you felt your whole body begin to shake as you stare at him. Watching in awe as he looked at JB still holding that perfectly cheeky smile you loved so fucking much. The smile you were sure you’d never see again…

“An who’s this?” Eggsy asked not looking from the pug he held tightly, enjoying the shower of affection.

Eggsy still hadn’t noticed you standing off in the corner by the door and it was apparent that he didn’t recognize JB at all… At that realization you took in a deep pained gasp; one that was far too loud, throwing your hand over your mouth as the salted tears slipped from your eyes aggressively.

He darted his gaze to yours immediately upon your exhale, clearly being caught by surprise; and at first he looked so young and innocent… like someone else entirely. And he didn’t know who the fuck you were…

“This guy yours?” Eggsy asked, hardly seeming to notice you…

You pulled your hand from your mouth, still not moving or speaking as you send your tongue to wet your lips. When he looked at you again, you shook your head ever so slightly back and fourth in silent reply.

In the next seconds you watched as Eggsy’s eyes changed. That azure stare shifted as he narrowed his eyes on yours; scanning you like the pages of a book he could hardly make out. A moment later he stepped closer, each footstep more cautious than the last; with eyes still pushed to thin slits. The expression he wore was one you’d seen a hundred times before. It was the same look he made when he was trying to remember an actors name, or the title of some song stuck in his head…

Like something was on the tip of his tongue… but he just couldn’t figure out what it was.

He cocked his head slightly, standing between the two tables holding their respective items sporting that same bewildered look. His lips parted as he place JB to the ground taking another leery step in your direction. “I… I know you, don’I?”

You still couldn’t speak, but you nodded once with lips clenched together like they were glued in place.

“Wh… where do I…” Eggsy started with uncertainty, then turned to look at Harry sharply. He pulled his hand to his head gripping his eyes shut behind a tight fist, his face pulled about uncomfortably.

You stepped closer to him instinctively, wanting nothing more than to protect him. To hug him, and tell him how much you loved him and missed him. You didn’t even give a shit how he got there, or that he was legally dead… You could figure all that shit out later.

What mattered now was that he was here… that he was alive.

After a moment Eggsy lifted his face to yours, his eyes wide matching your own. His lips parted again as he swallowed deeply before saying your name.

In a flash you closed the space between each other, pressing your bodies together tightly like you couldn’t be close enough. The pull was so strong it was magnetic and you never wanted to let him go. The way he kissed you was deep, fervent, and you honestly didn’t care if you were just stuck in some sick dream.

When you separated you noticed that the others had already retreated someplace else; offering the privacy you so desperately needed. You were full of questions, and desperate for answers but nothing came out but more tears.

Eggsy put both of his hands around your face, holding you softly between them as he wipe the tears away with his thumbs. “How long’s it been, luv? Why’s it feel like years since I done that?”

You pulled your hands to rest around his wrists as you rub your thumbs on the  back of his hands. When you spoke, you could hardly raise above a whisper and your tone was lined with reluctance. “6 months and 22 days…”

Eggsy shook his head unbelieving, released a pained exhale at your chest; his mouth opening and taking many shapes before he pulled his lip tightly between his teeth. He looked like he was going to break for a moment, but his eyes lightened and he smiled at you so sweetly that all of your worries began seeping away.

“Did you miss me?” He asked softly, his words sweet like honey as he kissed you on the tip of your nose.

“That’s what you have to say? Seriously?” You laughed pushing him playfully in the stomach, feeling the familiar way he flinched at your soft pokes; and for a moment you were back to normal. Back to before you had to live a life without him in it, if you could really call what you did living…

He pulled you closer, locking his arms around your waist securely. “Bit better than ‘I lived’, innit?”

“I don’t know what the fuck I expected.” You confessed, deciding that this was most definitely the response you’d anticipated. Leave it to Eggsy to crack a joke after coming back from the dead, so to say…

But it really was nice to laugh again and it was amazing to have him back– even his shitty one liners.

Eggsy kissed you again, softer than the last time; like he was soaking you up as he pulled one hand to the back of your neck softly. Breathing you in like a long forgotten scent, and in a way: you were. “I love you so fuckin’ much, you know that don’ya?”

“Love you too, Eggy.” You scanned each new pale scar that decorated his chin as you pulled your fingers across the one over his eyebrow; tracing it lightly. “I can’t lose you again…”

“You ain’t gonna. Was a one time thing— my dyin’, I swear it.” He reassured you with confidence so strong, there was no denying he believed it wholeheartedly.

So you kissed him, finally feeling whole again. “Do you promise?”

“Promise, luv. Told ya, didn'I? Was always gonna come back to ya… jus lost my way for a bit.”

You weren’t sure he could really make a promise like that again, but for now you were prepared to believe anything that slipped from his perfect lips. And if you’d learned anything from this mess, it was that if anyone could keep their word… it was Eggsy.

“Always.”

[hotsaucess]

Not an April Fools prank. I actually worked on my fic today. I got like 3 paragraphs done.

[panickedpansexualprincess]

Me: Just. Trying to figure out how to fit this all together. Cause Harry’s not really.... the Bear type... Jess: No, no he’s not. Me: And neither are Merlin or Eggsy, so.... Jess: Well, you don’t have to if it doesn’t fit. Me: Yeah, but Mary gave me the prompt. Mmmm. Maybe.... undercover? Jess: Yeah! It could be for a mission- they do all kinds of weird shit for missions, right?

/aka, me gigglecackling at @fandomjunkie2004‘s enthusiasm as she cries out that last bit, as I read up further into the Leather and Bear community in London

[brinleyparke]

I added several new prompts, including 2 crossover prompts.

[fuckyeahharryhart]

If you’ve been reading my fanfics, this is my original female characters wardrobe.

Her name is Gwendolyn.

She doesn’t have a code name yet.

She is Merlin’s secret daughter from his life before Kingsman when he was still Haymish Mycroft.

She grew up on her own at a secret branch of Kingsman.

She is also a badass spy who takes after her parents. Her mother, who was Bhutanese, was also a spy and was Haymish’s handler.

After the death of her father, she went to London to take her father’s place. 

SPOILER ALERT: She makes it with Harry Hart, because of course she does.

Imagine Merlin + the Queen of Bhutan = Gemma Chan

(who IRL is half Scottish! What?!)

FanFic link on home page:

[plasticnightmaredoll]

This blog is no longer active

I have decided to “close” this blog because I don’t have the time or energy to invest in it anymore, and haven’t even been on Tumble in months. I’ll keep the blog up just in case I come back.

Blog/Self Intro

I figured this might be easier than flooding my blog header description with content.

About Me

My online alias is Goji Hime. 

Pronouns are she/her.

Header image is a commission completed by @stillfuckinbetterthanyou and features Telltale Riddler, me, and Silco. 

Avatar is me from the same commission piece.

Massive fan of Lady Gaga.

Happy gamer who can’t game for crap lol.

I’m a self-shipper/fictosexual, and my f/os are listed on my masterlist page as well as in this post. I’m happy to share my f/os as well, so no worries!

The weird title for my blog can be explained as follows: “Plastic” and “Doll” are from “Plastic Doll,” one of my favorite songs by Lady Gaga, and my favorite song off of her Chromatica album. The song also hits me in a personal way that I won’t go into here. “Nightmare” is present in my blog title because I like horror games and movies, and I love Doom, which has always had a “Nightmare” mode of gameplay. 

Do Not Interact

DNI if you hate reader-insert writings and/or canon character x o/c pairings. I mean, follow if you want but don’t be mean about these kinds of writings, is what I’m saying.

DNI if like pairings with and/or post content involving underage characters.

DNI if you are extremely possessive of your s/os and don’t like the idea of sharing them.

DNI if you don't like self-shippers and/or fictosexuals.

DNI if you are racist, sexist, and/or are trans/ace/aro/pan/biphobic.

DNI if you hate animals/support animal cruelty.

DNI if you are intent on causing drama. I will shut that shit down.

DNI if you are a hard-core BlackCage (Erron Black x Cassie Cage) fan, and/or are a die-hard Cassie Cage fan. And don’t come bitching to me about either of these. I don’t want to fucking hear it.

About My Writing

Here is a masterlist of writings, headcanons, drabbles, etc. for your viewing pleasure =D

Here is a link to my AO3 account as well.

I tend to write (female) reader insert works, but will once in a while use an o/c.

Feedback and constructive criticism of my work is encouraged! Just don’t be a dick.

I don’t take requests, though, for my writings, just fyi. If I ever do, I’ll be sure to make a post about it and will update this one.

Sometimes, I am inspired be other people’s works, and I will mention it in any case where this is so.

I don’t write or support pairings involving underage characters.

I also DO NOT write pairings in such a way that involves non-consensual content or abusive behavior, or tries to “romanticize” such things. Some possessiveness and jealousy can be present in some of my works but nothing that is terrifying and/or creepy.

That being said, if I ever do write fics or h/cs that would involve non-con material, abuse, severe depression, etc. I swear, I will post a warning before the writing, for one, and I won’t use such material for “shock value” nor do I intend to write such content in a disrespectful, immature manner. I take these things seriously, so, if I put anything of the sort in a fic, there’s a reason, and it’s, again, NOT for shock value.

There are some age gap pairings I do support and follow (i.e. one of my OTPs is Eggy Unwin x Harry Hart from the “Kingsman” movies), and sometimes I write stuff involving age gap pairings, BUT, thanks to a kind user, I promise that I will try to remember to post a disclaimer stating if the fic involves an age gap pairing AND what the age gap is. This way, no one who is uncomfortable with such content is caught off guard while reading, which can be upsetting, I understand.

If I ever forget to post some sort of trigger warning for a fic or set of h/cs, then by all means, message me and let me know so I could update tags and warnings accordingly. I wouldn’t intentionally forget to do such a thing, but accidents happen, and I don’t want people to feel upset by my work when it could be avoided.

[zebraljb]

Fic Questions

Tagged by my lovely @tastymoves...

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

433.

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

4613257 - because we ALL know I’m longwinded when I write

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Eight: Kingsman movies, real person fiction (I’ve written one Armie Hammer/Timothee Chalamet story, one story involving Anderson Cooper, one story involving Adam Lambert), Backstreet Boys members, NSYNC members, Boondock Saints movies, Boondock Saints actors, Lord of the Rings Actors, Phantom of the Opera characters

4) What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Talk to Me (Kingsman AU Merwin, 1189), Driving the Nail (Kingsman Merhartwin, 885, the first story in the series),  Photographs & Memoris (Kingsman Harwin, 867), Return to Sender (Kingsman AU Hartwin, 834), and On the Road (Kingsman Merwin, 782).

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try to, but sometimes when people just leave hearts, I feel awkward and don’t know what to say. I suppose thank you is good enough, but I feel like it isn’t.

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

I do not do angsty endings. I don’t think I’ve ever even tried. I am a huge fan of the happy ending. I’ve put angst in the middle, but never at the end.

7) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

When I wrote in the boyband fandom, I would write BSB/NSYNC crossovers, but I’m not sure that counts.  I did put James Bond in Talk to Me, though...

8) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

When I first started writing in the Kingsman fandom, I received some scathing remarks when I made Harry Hart a bottom. I also received some nasty remarks once because someone said that I made it sound like all men like other men to have penises, basically that I was shaming any transgender people who identified as male and didn’t have penises. Most of you reading this know I never ever want to offend anyone, and it really hurt my feelings when this person attacked me so savagely about something that I never even thought twice about.

9) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I do. I used to write a lot naughtier, but now I seem to always do best when it is wrapped in a good relationship, or when hidden feelings are under the surface.  My boys like happy sex.  Then again...if you’ve read the Driving the Nail series, you know I’ve explored puppy play and other kinks. I haven’t written that for a while...I think I’m due to go back there soon...

10) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Hopefully not

11) Have you ever had a fic translated?

A few, yes.

12) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, because fic writing is the only place in my life where I am 100% selfish. I’m not ready to move over and let anyone else drive.

13) What’s your all time favorite ship?

This is hard, but Hartwin. They are beautiful together, Harry adores his Eggsy, Eggsy worships the ground Harry walks on, and I will die on this hill.

14) What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

My last NSYNC story. It was good, but I slowly lost steam.

15) What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue. Bantering dialogue.

16) What are your writing weaknesses?

Plot, good descriptive paragraphs.

17) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I don’t have any thoughts on this.

18) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Before the internet was a thing, in 1990, I wrote New Kids on the Block stories.

19) What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?

It would probably be Talk to Me.  It started with a tiny spark of an idea, and grew into this thing and people loved it.

@stronglyobsessed, @dauntlessdiva, @elton-hercules-john

[zoefandom127]

i’m gonna post the first chapter of this along with some of my other fics before i post the rest of the chapters.

Catch Me

Charlotte woke with a groan. A splitting pain erupted from her head and caused her to wince. She tried to open her eyes but the light just made the pain in her head worse. She took a deep breath and counted to three before she forced her eyelids to open up.

She looked around and saw that she was in a big box. The top and bottom side of the box were metal while the rest was glass. There was a door that had a metal walkway attached to it. The path led to the floor of a building she didn't recognize.

Charlotte made a move to get up but found that she was restricted. She looked down and saw that she was in a metal chair, hands bound to the arms. Her thighs were bound down by the seat of the chair. There were no legs to the chair, though, leaving her legs free and her feet planted firmly on the ground. The chair was held up by two long poles coming down from the top of the box and connecting to the back of the chair. Weird.

As Charlotte's vision adjusted, her eyes began to focus on her surroundings more. She looked through the clear glass and was met with a blue sky. Weirder. She leaned her body to look down through the glass and saw that she wasn't on the ground. Actually, she was nowhere near the ground.

The girl's mind went haywire from that moment on. She had been afraid of heights ever since she went on that roller coaster with Henry. She already wasn't a big fan of being away from the beautiful, sweet earth but Henry persuaded her to join him. Turns out the ride was having some technical difficulties so when they went on a loop, they got stuck halfway. Upside down. For ten whole minutes.

It was the most traumatizing experience Charlotte had ever had.

"Okay. This is okay. Everything's fine. I'm just, um, not on the ground. In the sky. Thousands of feet in the air. Everything is perfectly fine." Charlotte thought. Full on conversations with herself in her head were definitely her favorite coping mechanism.

Charlotte willed the bile to stay down whilst she continued observing her surroundings. Her eyes searched the floor presented in front of her. She saw a lithe figure tweaking a large control panel. The figure was dressed in a black high-low trench with a red and black belt wrapped around her waist.

The figure turned around and Charlotte gasped at the sight of the person's face.

Gwen.

...

Henry exited the elevator and entered the ManCave. He had already finished his shift at Junk N' Stuff and hadn't had anything else to do so he decided to see if he was needed.

"Hey Ray." Henry asked.

"Hey kid, 92...93...94," Ray breathed out.

Henry saw the grown man lifting 100 pound dumbbells while Shwozz timed how long. Ray was barely sweating as he counted how many curls he did.

"95...96...97...98...100!" Ray dropped the dumbbells and bowed. "And that my friends is how it's done."

"Dude," Henry deadpanned, "you totally skipped a number."

"What? No I didn't." Ray countered.

"Yes you did. You didn't say 99."

"I know what I said, kid. '96, 97, 98, 100.'"

"Dude, you just did it again!" Henry spoke.

"Okay kid, obviously, you're death because I definitely know how to count."

"Death? Do you—do you mean deaf?!" Henry sputtered.

"Yeah, that's what I said."

"Unbelievable. You know what? Never mind."

A beeping went off suddenly and Shwozz ran over to the ManComputer. Henry looked around for his best friend but couldn't find her.

"Hey, where's Charlotte?" he asked.

"No idea. She never came in today." Shwozz spoke, accent very present.

Weird. Usually Charlotte's always "present and punctual" as she likes to say. It's odd that she's not here.

"It's a video call. Oh! Maybe it's that hot reporter you went out with." Shwozz said.

"Play it." Ray stated as he and Henry popped a bubble into their mouths to get in uniform. Ray was quickly trying to fix his hair as he waited for the reporter's call.

Shwozz hit the reply button on the keyboard and waited for the connection to stabilize.

"Well, hello there Captain Man and Kid Danger. Or should I say Ray Manchester and Harry Hart." a feminine voice spoke, a smirk evident on her face.

"Uh, actually it's Henr—" Henry started.

"Gwen." Ray growled.

"Oh and I almost forgot!" Gwen turned the camera around to focus on a glass like box, revealing a person trapped inside, "Special guest: Charlotte Bolton."

i hope this fandom isn’t dead lol

[hotsaucess]

Ghost part 1

(summary: in 1997 Lee Unwin died, six months later his son Eggsy Unwin went missing. In 2015 Harry Hart sees a ghost. Note: super angsty. I hate hurting Harry like this but the muses demand it.

Update: Made minor edits to fit better with later chapter(s))

Harry Hart has two major regrets in his life. The first is the tragic and untimely demise of one Lee Unwin.

Lee had been a wonderful man. Strong, determined, brilliant and so very kind. One of Harry's dearest friends. Practically a brother. He was also a near perfect recruit. He would have been a wonderful Kingsman as well if it hadn't been for Harry's stupid mistake. If Harry had just Seen that damn granade then Lee would be alive and both Harry's regrets would have never happened. But Harry can't change the past, Lee died and six months later Harry's biggest regret still happened.

Eggsy Unwin was a sweet little boy. Always had been. Energetic and bright, full of innocent hope. His bright light dimmed a little after his father died but he was so strong and kind, just like his father. Harry had always adored the boy. Harry had promised Lee he would always protect his wife and son. For six months after Lee died it was so easy. Caring for this wonderful family had never been a burden. It was all so Easy.

Until it wasn't. Until he failed. Until he lost that bright hopeful boy. He failed Lee. He failed Michelle. And most painfully of all he Failed sweet, kind little 7 year old Eggsy Unwin. And he kept failing him, and failing him. Harry was so sure that he could protect Eggsy that when he was taken a mere six months after Lee's death Harry was crushed.

Harry tried so hard to hold on to hope. He searched every possible lead to find Eggsy. But trails ran cold. Harry hit dead end after dead end and after so many years with no new leads Harry just had to accept that the boy was most likely dead.

The man Harry was now was almost unrecognizable to the man he has been back when the Unwin family was whole. Physically Harry didn't really Look too different from before, the years showed of course in the multiplying lines on his face and the strands of grey streaked through his hair. No the change was in his eye's and how he carried himself. Harry was a man defeated, a man weighted down by the pain of a life of lose and regret. He was still a brilliant agent but his soul-deep sadness was always visible in his once bright eyes.

Merlin and Harry had grown apart through the years. Or more accurately Harry had pushed them apart. Harry had built up his walls so high that even his best friend could not break through. Merlin had tried, never stopped really, but he realized that Harry wouldn't let him in. Merlin still considered Harry his best friend, he cared so deeply for him but he had to change how he showed it. He always kept a close eye on Harry, made sure he took care of himself, made sure Harry didn't get too reckless. He knew that Harry felt he had nothing left to lose and Merlin wasn't about to let Harry die too. Not by his own hand or the hand of an enemy. He had been successful so far but the worry was always there.

Harry is disgusted by these heinous people. He could barely call them people. They are Monsters. Kidnappers, human trafficers, drug dealers and hired guns. He despised them all but he had to infiltrate them in order to take them down. He had finally managed to get into their main base. He was making his way to find the boss when he stopped dead in his tracks.

He had gone mad surely. It has to be the only explanation. He couldn't breathe because in front of him, as real and solid as himself, stood a ghost.

"Lee?"