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poisonheadcrabsalesman · 1 month ago

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Mind Games

Chapter 1/2 - The Milland bodysharing thing I have been kicking around for a while now. Beware all ye read this, there's brief descriptions of body functions (specifically some piss stuff). I"ll probably mark this explicit on ao3 later.

"Oh, this is awesome!" He says around a mouth of half-eaten bacon cheeseburger. "Yeah, okay, I see why you guys get cravings." Wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, he then grimaces at the feeling. The corners of his borrowed mouth pull down and his brow furrows - skin and muscle moving and he’s aware of it. Sauce on skin, half a day’s stubble scratching the back of his hand, and then the rough texture of recycled paper napkins wiping away the mess. There’s so much to consider when dealing with the physical.

Roland resumes chowing down on their meal, mind drifting and ideas floating by a mile a minute. His thoughts focus on the burger in front of them and veer widely into multiple tracks that Miller cannot keep up with. The beginning of a headache flashes a warning spike of pain behind Miller’s eyes and Roland backs off. His borrowed hand grabs some fries and his thoughts linger on the cloying feel of oil and salt on his fingertips.

Miller sits passenger in his own body, by choice, and enjoys the sensation of being right and of the secondhand joy of discovery and experience.

"Whoa, carbonation is a thing that tastes! Neat!" Roland exclaims, with his mouth, so Miller takes it upon himself to call him out, and maybe slow him down too.

Just because he was a Spartan didn't mean he didn't get stomach aches.

You've been spending too much time on Waypoint picking up stupid lingo. Also, slow your roll, food's not going anywhere.

"Relax, Jared. Wow that's funny to hear coming out of your mouth. Anyways, I won't do anything unbecoming of a Spartan, especially not a mission handler, we came to an agreement. I get a burger with fries, and a nap."

It's funny that you think you can escape the consequences of this body if you eat too fast. If I'm going to suffer, so are you, Roland.

Also, can you chill with the leg bouncing?

"Oh, I didn't notice that. Huh." He stops jiggling Jared's leg and clumsily grabs more fries, trying some plain, some with ketchup, and some with the 'secret' sauce that he knows is just-

Do not ruin the secret sauce for me.

"Fine, fine. I forgot how much bleeds through like this. Oh we're out of soda." A smile forms on Jared's face and he doesn't like it.

"You still have your stash, right?"

He does. He knows Roland knows he does. He knows Roland knows he knows he does and that he knows Roland knows.

The silence extends and the grin turns vicious.

...you can have one.

"Two! And I'll cut the nap short, give you the keys back early."

Fine.

"Great! I always wanted to try these!" He has the gall to sneak over to Jared's stash while rubbing his hands together like a cartoon villain.

Just two! I'm saving the energy drink, do not drink the energy drink, Roland.

"Yeah yeah whatever, I didn't want it anyway."

Jared knows that's a lie.

He grabs a tea and a root beer, and the container of fries again before hitting play on the datapad and resuming their show. Watching it in real time wasn't as slow while in the meat suit, but it was still pretty similar to how they usually hung out, other than the shared emotions and physical feelings. Their reactions were there for the other to see instantly, rather than something they chose to voice. There was comfort in the familiarity of the time together, but with all of the sensations shifted to the left.

Please do not refer to my body as a meat suit.

Roland ignores him and cracks open the root beer, head tilted as he listens to the hiss as his eyes drift back to the screen for both their sakes. He sips at it and smacks his lips, and Jared has to wonder if he doesn't like it even though they're sharing the same taste buds right now.

"It's weird...but alright." He silences a burp with a fist and blinks at how it settles their gut.

Jared doesn't know what's weirder, watching someone learn about human sensations firsthand, or that Roland has access to all of recorded human history and he still had to learn the hard way about burping through your nose after drinking carbonation.

"Hey! I heard that." He settles more in the chair, wiggling to get comfortable before deciding to sit forward and jiggle his leg again. "Human bodies are weird and messy, but food does seem to be worth it. We have to try more next time. I want coffee."

We'll see. I’m not sure how you’ll react to caffeine and if I want to deal with that. Why don't you try the tea first though, it's sweet and I know I like it.

Miller barely thinks the words and Roland is pawing at the bottle, leg going a mile a minute. He doesn't even question Miller's tone so he resigns to fade back into passenger mode and not draw attention to anything beyond their show.

"Oh this is evil, it's a drink that makes you thirstier." Roland says after coming up for air after downing half the bottle. He sighs and crosses his legs, then uncrosses them, and Jared can feel his brow furrowing again. Confusion at a new sensation, processing input and trying to label something just out of reach.

But then something happens in the show and it catches Roland's attention, but Miller is too busy trying not to think too loudly as he watches Roland. Watches him drink more as he zones out to the familiar outro and scratch at the stubble Jared hadn't shaved.

Roland yawns, stretches, and then stands to pace. He’s off-balance. Too many new inputs without sources he recognizes. The weird feeling has only been getting worse, a strange pressure growing and he doesn't know what it is and Miller has been quiet for a bit. Too quiet.

"You know what's happening, and you’re keeping quiet, aren't you? Spartan Miller!"

Ooh Spartan Miller, the supergenius AI doesn't know what's happening to him. Come on, Roland, figure it out.

He squirms some more, pacing around the space with an off-kilter gait that gets worse as he thinks about it. He's never felt stuff like this before and Miller's not throwing him a bone! He even sounds whiny like Miller in the shared headspace. Hey! All of his usual 'senses' came with labels and obvious causes. This was entirely new and while beginning to border on painful, it wasn't entirely unpleasant.

It was just an unknown feeling, a strange pressure building, and the unknown part of it was both intriguing and terrifying. They were playing some kind of game and Roland didn't like to lose. Especially not to Miller.

Miller, who was sitting so smug in the back of his own mind and watching Roland struggle.

Sounds like you're giving up already.

"Shut up. I'll figure it out, human bodies aren't that complicated."

The judging silence that follows only leaves him more annoyed and the pressure is so distracting. It had started off as a feeling niggling in the back of their shared brain, but now it was taking up so much of their attention, he couldn't think or focus on anything else.

Go look in the mirror.

Roland sighs and stomps their way into the tiny bathroom attached to Miller's quarters, a perk of his rank and the Infinity being a retrofitted colony ship. It’s almost comical how he has to wedge Miller’s bulk into the tiny space and hunch to fit through the door.

"Okay, happy now?" He asks as he glares at Jared's face in the mirror and makes it frown.

Turn on the sink.

"Why?" And he twists the knob and fidgets as the tap runs, "Whatever. It's not like we're thirsty, I drank-"

His hands grab the sink edge and he shifts his weight from foot to foot as he makes the connections and Jared's triumphant smugness radiates through their shared mindspace. It's not as strong as the pressure is now that Roland understands what it is, where the urge originated from and what's going to happen now.

Everything alright, Roland?

He can feel Jared pushing at the mental connection, still a passenger, but he's putting more of his focus, more of his being into mentally being in Roland's way. Ignoring him as best he can, he hobbles to the toilet and fumbles with Miller's pants.

Trying to thread his dick through the hole in the front proves to be too much of a challenge so he pulls them down around his thighs and hisses as the cold air of the room somehow makes the pressure even worse.

He takes him in hand and aims and waits. And waits.

The pressure hurts a bit now and he whines, realizing he also left the tap running. The sound of the water is all-consuming and he can't just...do it. The urge is there and he's trying, but he can't.

Human bodies aren’t complicated, huh?

Jared is weighing heavy in their mind and watching, waiting for him to give or for this to end and Roland can't figure it out.

Forcing himself to relax proves fruitless too because he doesn't know what to do, and the noise and discomfort are building off each other in his mind.

Need help?

Roland grumbles and acquiesces, just so it'll be over. He shifts back and lets Miller take control of his body again, but clings close to see how it's done, and feel some relief because he feels like he's going crazy.

"Can't believe an AI can be pee-shy." Jared huffs and adjusts and then just goes.

Someone moans with their mouth as the pressure is finally, finally released and tension drains from Jared's body. Roland shivers and then so does Jared at the feeling.

They stand there for a while, tap running while they wait and wait.

When it's done, Jared tucks himself away, flushes, and then stretches and yawns.

"Wow, I feel lighter now. You really drank all of that and couldn't put the clues together." He says, smiling into the mirror as he washes his hands.

Roland sulks. He slinks at the back of Miller’s consciousness like a cat who’s been thwarted from catching a bird by the cruel presence of a closed window.

But he also learned some things, and in the end, that was what this whole experiment was about.

And there would be more, he's sure of it.

"Aw, are you sulking? It's fine. Come on, you still have a nap to try."

Roland grabs for the controls with a bit more force and startles the both of them before he shuffles back to the bunk. “Fine. I want to see what’s so good about unconsciousness anyways.”

If we have weird dreams, it’s your fault.

He grumbles with Miller’s mouth and then tries to get comfortable. They lay there for all of a minute before an itch starts somewhere between mind and body and Roland flops them on Miller’s side and huffs. He drags the blanket across their shared body like it’s offended him in some way. Another twenty seconds tick by in annoyance and he rolls the other way. “This is hard.”

It takes time. Try focusing on breathing and laying still.

“Don’t usually do that.” Roland murmurs with his face mushed against a pillow. Miller’s eyes are shut and he focuses on the breathing and all the points of contact they have with the bunk. Pressure on his hip and knee from how they lay, the pillow against his face and his arms beneath it, his rib cage expanding as he breathes. Roland doesn’t have to think about it, it’s an involuntary process, much like his own subroutines. There’s comfort in the automatic, when a system knows how to keep itself running.

The warmth of his body heat and the light weight of the blanket help, as does the slow focused rhythm of Miller’s breathing. Their shared mind drifts in all sorts of directions in a very not-AI sort of way. Hazy half-remembered thoughts and trailing ideas for things to do and the zen-like emptiness of a body and mind beginning rest.

Sleep takes them, and so does half a REM cycle that’s then interrupted by an alarm on Miller’s datapad.

Groggy and confused, they roll over and squint at the ceiling. There’s drool, dried and crusty on Miller’s face and a damp spot on his pillow. Disgusting, Roland thinks. They feel heavy and slow and very unmotivated until Miller sighs and forces them to sit up.

Miller was hoping he wouldn’t feel exhausted after a short nap, but you can’t win ‘em all.

“What do you mean sometimes you feel worse after sleeping?” Roland whines with Miller’s voice.

The human body is full of surprises.

“This sucks.”

Yup. Becoming a Spartan didn’t fix everything.

“If anything, it gave you more problems.”

A bemused snort escapes him and the fickle feeling of holding in a laugh.

You always know what to say, Roland.

“You’re right, I do! And now it’s time to take the keys back, cuz I’m done with this biology stuff.”

A second passes and both minds are quiet.

Something is wrong. Miller’s heart-rate kicks up and panic prickles on the back of their shared neck, hair rising as the swooping sensation in their gut does nothing to distract from the sense of wrongness. Like the feeling of realizing you’ve made a mistake while walking downstairs in the dark, that final unexpected precipice sending panic that bulldozes all logic and experience.

They’re stuck. Together. Or swapped. Miller isn’t in the chip per se, but he can’t take the wheel again. Roland’s stuck and can’t give back the controls without an intense feeling of vertigo causing them to crash to the bunk.

“Oh god… We need to tell the commander…”

Oh god, we need to tell the commander.

#my writing #Roland the AI #Spartan Miller #ta-da!#happy birthday you little yellow fuck im doing more ai possession to no one's surprise #read the warning

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