#Happy Holi Messages 2018

[strawberrychampagneglass]

Roses - pt. 1

Paige x Azzi

CW: cursing, implications of domestic violence (ONLY AT THE END), angst, maybe some fluff?, pining

9.3k words DAMN

A/N: holy shit guys I did not think I could pull this off and to think that this is gonna be a series is wild to me. Jokes aside, this took me about 2.5 weeks so expect (somewhat) infrequent updates due to school work and all that. Ik y'all have been waiting so I'll drop the first chapter. Something to be mindful of: initially this thing was in GSV then I changed it to LA last minute and then I changed Nika to Cam and Gabby to Dearica because Gabby and Nika didn't make sense to me at all so yea enjoy AND PLEASE DO GIVE ME FEEDBACK!!! I appreciate it a lot I WILL ADD A MASTERLIST WHEN MY HEART COMPELS ME TO

October 15th, 2028

Los Angeles, California

“Azzi,” her urgent voice calls out to the dark. She nearly trips over the entrance mat as she enters her apartment in the early morning hours. She drunkenly yells for her again as she stumbles towards her bedroom. 

The only response she gets is an echo of her voice.

She lands in her bed with a soft thud, her hand searching for the familiar warmth of another body. When she feels the cold bed sheet under her hand instead, the only thing she can hear is the hammering inside of her head while her heart throbs, threatening to pry itself out of its cage. Tears well in her eyes as she falls asleep. 

When she wakes up and checks her phone, she has one notification: a text message from Curt Miller. While it makes her heart palpitate as she remembers the happy memories, alarms blare in her head, reminding her of the bad that outweighed the good. 

Her excitement quickly turns to bitterness. Paige doesn’t want to play on the same team as Azzi. Not after the incident in her redshirt senior year. Not after their catastrophic argument at the 2025 WNBA draft. Not after she saw a new person with her Azzi. Not after she saw the diamond-studded ring on her fourth finger. 

Most of all, not after she built a stronghold with the most formidable defenses around her heart. 

July 29th, 2018

Minsk, Belarus 

The Belarusian crowd roars during the FIBA U17 Women’s Basketball World Cup final, drowning out the melody created by a screeching flute and deep, dulcet drum. With a very comfortable 32 point lead against the French in the middle of the fourth quarter, Paige is subbed out. She accepts the high-fives from her teammates before taking a seat at the end of the bench. Cheers flood the bench while they watch the clock wind down intently, waiting to relish in the intoxicating adrenaline following the victory. 

The blonde raps her foot against the floor anxiously; her jaw propped up by her clenched fists. From the point of view of her teammates, she is engaged in the game. However, inside of her mind, a storm brews.  She thinks of her best friend, the brunette girl with the number 6 on her back who is sat two seats to her left. Paige indulges in the memory of her fingers lingering on Azzi’s for that extra second after a high-five, their intertwined hands during the national anthem, and even when their shoulders brushed together in the team huddles and neither of them moved.

Her mind continues to wander until the bench unexpectedly explodes with chants of “USA” as the clock winds down into the last minute of the game. Paige springs from her seat on the bench, hollering as the adrenaline pumps through every vein in her body. When the final buzzer sounds, she shakes hands with the opposing team before hurling herself into the sea of navy jerseys. 

The rest goes by in a blur, her adrenaline depletes rapidly. The energetic girl is uncharacteristically quiet during their team dinner and even on the bus ride home where she opts to sit alone in the back, leaning her head against the cool window that soothed her aching head. 

As the bus pulls up to the hotel, Paige and Azzi lock eyes from opposing ends of the bus. The fatigue she once felt is quickly replaced with delight when Azzi gives her a tired smile with softened eyes, making her heart beat erratically. It’s still early in the evening, but the team agrees to celebrate in Cameron Brink’s room, without the coaches’ knowledge. While the team shuffles off the bus in a single-file line, Paige pushes through the never-ending hoard of her teammates until her eyes rest on a familiar brunette. She puts her hand on the brunette’s cold shoulder, catching her attention as she leaned into the warmth of Paige’s hand. Azzi chooses to ignore the pink that rose to the older girl’s cheeks and smiles at her. 

“Are you going to Cam’s?” Paige asks sheepishly, trying to hide her smile. Azzi chuckles before responding with a nod. 

“She is my roommate, so I guess I’m obligated to go.” Paige grins from ear-to-ear as they chat until they reach their respective hotel rooms. She changes into sweatpants and opts for a Hopkins Basketball hoodie. Although it's the middle of summer, the temperatures in Minsk are frigid compared to the Minnesota heat. 

Furtively leaving her hotel room, she spots her teammate, Zia Cooke, attempting to sneak several bottles of cheap vodka into Cam’s room, her shoulders are tense and eyes rove across the empty hallway. Paige giggles before walking over to the shorter girl to offer a hand. When her teammate’s eyes land on her friendly face, the muscles in her shoulders loosen.

“Paige, thank god,” she breathes, relieved. “I was so scared that Carla or Stephen would jump out of their rooms.” Paige laughs at the image of Coach Berube catching Zia while looking like a deer in headlights, juggling 5 bottles of vodka. Feeling bad for her teammate, she takes three bottles from her arms and opens the door to Cam’s room. The two girls are met with 10 pairs of curious eyes who cheer at the sight of the vodka bottles.

***

An hour later, the potent odor of vodka floods the room. Most of her teammates gossip about their crushes back home; others watch the late-night shows on the Belarusian TV channels, a few are even snoring obnoxiously on Azzi’s bed. Paige, who is completely sober, feels irritated from her spot on the floor as she watches the dramatic show that is being projected on the TV. She isn’t sure if it was the lack of alcohol, or if it was the sight of her best friend who presses her body against Hailey Van Lith while an arm that wasn’t hers is strung around the brunette’s waist and resting on her toned abdominal muscles. 

When Azzi notices the blonde’s glare at Hailey, she walks off the bed and carefully treads towards the table of alcohol, pouring a full glass of vodka. Her eyes flick to Paige, who stares at the glass of vodka in her hand. Unamused and frustrated, Paige returns her attention to the show on the TV until she feels a warm hand tilt her chin back. Azzi looks at her, emotionless, as she stands behind her. They stare at each other wordlessly before the older head lands on a soft, toned leg. Her lower lip meets the cool rim of the glass that Azzi filled with vodka.

The brunette moves her face closer before she tips the glass upward while noticing a light streak of red across Paige’s cheeks. “Drink,” she whispers, and Paige complies. She feels the alcohol burn her esophagus as she swallows the oily and bitter liquid. Their faces linger in the close proximity as they breathe in synchronization. It takes every ounce of self control in Paige’s body to not close the distance between their lips. 

“You look pretty,” Paige smiles, hoping for a laugh and a friendly slap across the shoulder from her friend. Instead, Azzi returns a frown with furrowed eyebrows, moving her head away. 

“Paige, I can’t enjoy my evening when you’re glaring at everyone I’m sitting with,” Azzi huffs with an edge to her voice. “Go get drunk and leave me alone.” Paige scowls; she knows that Azzi isn’t exclusive to her, but she wants some exclusivity. At the end of the day, they’re just best friends, nothing more. Nevertheless, the thought of another girl’s body pressing her body flush against Azzi infuriates her. From her spot on the floor, she feels the warmth of her friend’s body disappear as she walks back to her spot next to Hailey. 

She grabs her wallet and phone and leaves the room. 

***

When she returns to her hotel room hours later, she slams the newly-bought bottle of vodka on her nightstand, shaking the entire room. It isn’t a big bottle; it’s around the size of a Gatorade bottle. The cashier at the convenience store didn’t bother checking the 16-year-old’s ID, assuming she was of legal drinking age. She popped the cap off the bottle and brought it to her mouth. Her lips begin to form a suction around the opening as she tilts her head back, swallowing the searing liquid. She throws the rest of the liquid down her throat when the thought of Azzi’s words cross her mind. She tightens her grip on the bottle and her tongue scours for the last few drops of the liquid, hungry for the feeling of the alcohol. She sits on her bed in silence, staring at her feet until she feels the effects of the alcohol course through her veins. Her vision begins to blur and the entire room begins to swirl. Through her blurred vision, she still manages to identify the lamp that sits perfectly still on the nightstand. Her free hand reaches for the dangling chain that serves as a lever for the light. Giving it a slight tug, the light flickers briefly before illuminating the entire room. To her shock, a familiar brunette girl with bronze skin sits across from her.

“Are you done being an alcoholic so we can talk?”

“Azzi, what the fuck?” the blonde stammers, frustrated. She sets the bottle down and stares at her friend in disbelief. When Paige gets no response from her, she stands up and starts stumbling towards the door, nearly tripping over herself.

“Paige, wait,” Azzi catches the blonde, observing the older girl’s cloudy eyes. Even while drunk, her blue eyes remind her of her lake house; her second home. The thought makes her heart flutter despite the agonized look painted across her best friend’s entire face. “I’m sorry, we can talk about this if you want. I know I hurt you, and I take full accountability for it.” 

Paige knows she is in damage control mode, but she has a soft spot for the girl; a part that is willing to forgive her and move on. 

She chooses to ignore it and let her irritation control her words. “You didn’t want to talk before, so you don’t get to talk now,” she hisses. Azzi flinches, unaccustomed to her hostility. “You told me to leave you alone, and now you’re in my room, begging for forgiveness. I don’t understand you.” Her arms fly erratically before reaching the collar of her hoodie, tugging it down to ease her tense muscles.“For god’s sake, we’re best friends. Sure, best friends tell each other everything, but my best friend doesn’t get to tell me to leave her alone and show up in my hotel room 2 fucking hours later.”

“I’m not yours, Paige. You don’t have any right to control my actions.” The retort makes Paige wince. “If I want to be with Hailey, you have to respect that. I have a right to be frustrated because I don’t belong to you.” 

“Okay, how about a heads up next time instead of you getting cozy with someone else in front of your best fucking friend. I thought we agreed that we would ‘see each other later’” 

“She was drunk and she came up to me, and we did see each other. There was nothing binding about that agreement. I can be friends with other people and you can too, unless I’m your only friend.” Azzi’s anger rises as well as she picks at her cuticles. 

“You’re an asshole.” Paige breathes, releasing the hoodie. “You tried to get me drunk while trying to seduce me.” The other girl’s mouth opens before getting cut off. “Then, you went back over and cuddled up to her. I don’t have a problem with you seeing people, but even a short-term notice would’ve been nice. It’s fucking awkward when I’m sitting there–surrounded by drunk people who are all passed out on the damn floor–and my best friend is cuddling up to a person we barely even know.” 

“You know what? You sound really fucking insecure right now. Maybe you should go book a flight back to fucking Minnesota and we’ll never have to see each other again. You’ll never get jealous over me when I go on dates with other people.” As soon as the words leave her mouth, she wishes that she can take them back and shove them down her throat. Paige stares at her, emotionless. After a few minutes, Azzi’s voice cuts through the thick air. “Say something, please. You’re freaking me out.” 

“I wish I was yours, Azzi,” Paige whispers softly, so softly that Azzi thinks she mishears. She scowls, but her heart flutters from the confession.

“I need you to tell me that when you’re completely sober. I can’t trust you when you’re drunk.” she sighs, looking at the blonde who has tears brimming in her eyes. However, she can’t shake the warm, fuzzy feeling in her heart from her words. She can’t describe the feelings, and the thought of treading into unexplored emotional territory makes her queasy. 

“I wish I was yours,” Paige urges, with genuine sincerity in her tone despite the alcohol.

“Paige–”

Before she could finish her sentence, Paige grabs her wrist and pulls the younger girl into her. The blonde drags her along a premeditated route, stumbling several times. Biting the nails on her free hand, Azzi’s mind swarms with endless possibilities of danger; they could be kidnapped by random Belarusians, the coaches could catch them while getting a midnight snack, or they could get lost and never see their families again. But Paige was Paige, guiding her to their destination. The warmth radiating from the other girl’s body hypnotized her. It felt safe. Too safe. 

Paige leads her through the maze of the city until they reach the edge of a river. Even under the late-night sky, airplanes weave between silhouettes of clouds; their green and red lights blink, bringing life to the sky. The city is calm and serene at this hour, with the occasional passer-byer that ignores the two girls. The solitude is disrupted by cars gliding across the bustling road across the river bank with horns that blare occasionally. Street lights hug the river bank; streaks of yellow and orange rippled back and forth on the water. The breeze is soft, like a baby’s blanket. It carries the occasional, faint scent of cigarette smoke which is unexpectedly comforting. 

The two sit in mutual silence, away from each other. They both avoided the topic of the prior conversation. Paige hums softly, her body warm from the alcohol. “I didn’t know they had fireworks this late at night.” Her speech is slurred, yet Azzi still laughs in response. The sound of her laugh is like a piece of music written by Beethoven to her; a sound that can be played over and over without getting old. 

“They’re not fireworks, they’re street lights reflecting off the water.” The blonde squints, squatting on the large cement block that she had been sitting on. As she cranes her head closer, nearly falling off the block, Azzi scrambles to catch the blonde as she reflexively yanks her waist backwards. They laugh before Paige puts her hand on hers. 

“You’re acting really sober,” Paige declares while studying Azzi’s facial features. 

“I am sober, so I think it’s a good thing that I’m acting sober.” The younger girl chuckles, punching her friend’s arm lightly with her free hand. Flustered, Paige averts her gaze to the shimmering undulations on the surface of the water. Unsure of whether it was the alcohol that was twisting her mind, or if it was the dim, golden lighting that lights up the left side of Azzi’s face, all she can think about is that her best friend is beautiful.  It drives Paige insane; her bronze skin gleams and her umber eyes light up and become a light, almost golden shade of brown. 

“Sometimes I wish that you could be in Minnesota with me all the time.” 

“Well, you could come to Virginia and stay with me…” Azzi proposes before smiling at Paige, but she doesn't meet her eyes. The blonde is scrunching her face with her attention on Azzi’s arms, and not her face. “What’s wrong? Paige?”

“You’re cold,” Paige whispers, shifting her weight so she and Azzi sit facing each other. Trailing her hand up the other girl’s arm, her fingertips dance along the mountain ranges of goosebumps on her tender skin. Paige’s warm touch makes her feel something. Their eyes clash, uncertainty swarming in both pairs. “I meant what I said earlier,” Paige glances at her lips, breaking the eye contact. “I wish I was yours.” Her hand reaches for Azzi’s cheek, cupping it lightly, and the brunette melts into her touch.

Panic rises as a lump in her throat. They’re young–too young. Azzi’s feelings are new and confusing. She doesn’t know what love feels like and it scares her. As a kid, she was told that “love” was when two people cared for each other a lot. It was obvious that they care for each other a lot. They talk for hours, each word flowing effortlessly while they howl in laughter about something that the other said. Every touch they share is electric: sparks fly erratically through every vein of their bodies. After every argument, Paige is the first to apologize because she knows that Azzi overthinks. 

She moves her face closer and drapes her hands on the blonde’s nape. Paige takes the bait.

Her slightly-parted lips meet Azzi’s warm and soft lips. She closes her eyes, pulling the younger girl’s face in before pulling away after several seconds. The kiss is short, but sweet. Azzi looks at her hands, not wanting to meet the blue eyes knowing that she made a mistake, and the kiss shouldn’t have happened. The once well-established boundaries of their friendship are permanently breached. Yet her cheeks flush and she misses the warmth provided by the close proximity of Paige’s body.

“Raise your arms,” Paige mutters shyly as Azzi is enveloped in the warmth of a thick hoodie. Paige’s hoodie. The scent of Paige’s rosy perfume encases her and a contented sigh escapes her lips. 

“Are you cold?” Azzi observed her best friend’s exposed arms. 

“Nah, I’m alright. You can keep that by the way,” she motions to the hoodie that hugged Azzi’s torso. “It can be a souvenir from Belarus from me. Something that can remind you of tonight forever.” The brunette smiles and wraps her arms around the blonde; she is the clay that Paige can shape into anything she wants. They just fit together. 

The girls dance through the city and totter unsteadily to the hotel, where they collapse in the comfort of Paige’s bed, satisfied laughs slipping out of their mouths after sneaking past the rooms of their teammates. 

“Would you like me to walk you back to your room, Madame Fudd?” Paige teases before a pillow slams into her face. “Hey! Azzi!” She shrieks, scrambling to grab another pillow before falling flat on her face. Azzi laughs hysterically for a few moments until the room stills into an unsettling quiet. 

“You’re so chivalrous, Bueckers.” Azzi looks around her room, fidgeting with her fingers. “But, uh, since there’s a few drunk bodies on my bed,” The blonde cocks her head at her and smirks; the simple motion makes her heart lurch. “And also because you also don’t have a roommate and I thought that you might be a little lonely tonight, especially because you’ll be hungover in the morning, I was wondering if I could stay here tonight.” Paige breaks out into an ear-to-ear grin and tackles her in a bear hug, shoving them to the bed where their bodies melded into each other. 

Amongst the clamor, there is an uneasy feeling in Paige’s gut that she can’t shake, but she chooses to ignore the feeling as she lets her body intertwine with the younger girl’s. 

October 19th, 2028

New York City, New York

Azzi is selfish. 

Anything she gets her hands on, she wants to keep for herself. She is a hoarder who wants to keep everything that she loves forever. 

Unfortunately, when you fall in love with everything, you can’t have it all.

She paces back and forth at the gate, biting her nails and avoiding the gaze of her fiancé. Tugging the collar of her hoodie from her high school days over her head, she allows a satisfied sigh to escape her mouth as she is cloaked with a comforting rose scent. It was nostalgic; it held so many memories that felt so important and so irrelevant at the same time. But the scent made her feel hopeful of something she couldn’t place. 

“Is everything okay, babe?” startled, she drops the hoodie to smile weakly at her fiancé.

“Yeah, I’m okay. Just a little tired. The thought of everything scares me a little.” Azzi chuckles. Instead of a friendly smile from her fiancé, she notices his scowl at the text on her hoodie. Her heart drops into her stomach, knowing that this would prompt an argument from him over a certain college teammate. 

“I’m so happy you finally chose to leave the cesspool of New York,” her fiancé sneers, “and, I’m so excited to soak up the LA sun.” Azzi doesn’t react to his comments, avoiding an argument at all costs. He came to all her games and cheered her on, but he always hated New York City. It was either too cold or too hot, too rainy or too sunny and never the perfect balance between the two. 

As long as he’s happy, I am too. 

Los Angeles, California

Paige is protective. 

She loves her possessions and hates it when people take them. She wants to shield everything she loves from hurt and pain. 

Orange and pink rays of sunlight stream through the tall glass panes by Paige’s bedside, bathing her bedroom in a warm glow. She stirs awake, her sore body begging for 15 extra minutes of sleep. Her throat feels raw and her eyelids are weighted. Instead of fighting against the weight, Paige lets her eyes close while thinking about the consequences of not showing up to Azzi’s welcome party. When she first caught wind of the news, she called Cameron Brink to come to her apartment. She complained to her for hours while blackout drunk before inevitably passing out. When she woke up the next morning to dozens of angry texts from Cam, she apologized profusely, showing up to her apartment with the shoes that her friend had been eyeing for months and bags of Sour Patch Kids.

It was safe to say that Paige wasn’t allowed anywhere near alcohol tonight if she chose to go. At least, not under Cam’s watch. 

The Sparks had an extremely successful campaign last year and capped off the season with a championship title along with Paige’s first league MVP and finals MVP awards. The feeling is still surreal, and the thought of it pumps more adrenaline through her body. Even though the season was extremely successful, the threat of injuries plagued the guards last year. Also, the Sparks were in desperate need of a guard with the ability to knock down shots and step into the role of a strong playmaker.

Was she expecting Azzi to join the Sparks? Eventually, yes. She is desperate for a championship run. 

Did she want to celebrate a piece of her past she let go before her birthday? No. 

Is she happy about it? Absolutely not. 

Her phone began to vibrate violently under her pillow, prying her from her thoughts. She rolls over to scrutinize the contact name with a groan. Her blood runs cold and she taps the green phone icon on the 4th ring.

“Paige! Thank god I got in contact with you.” Katie Fudd exhales. Paige feels the weight of her panic that reciprocates her own through the phone. “I know we haven’t really talked in about, um, three years,” she pauses, unsure of how to continue when she hears Paige’s sharp inhale, “but, have you heard from Azzi recently? She’s supposed to be arriving in LA today, at least that’s what the media says.” 

“No, I…I haven’t heard anything, Katie,” she rasps, her throat ablaze. Her lips run dry. The media?

Paige makes small talk with Katie, catching up on major events in their life while both of them try to avoid the topic of Azzi. It was brought up once and Paige could barely perceive the muffled, yet pained sobs on the other end of the phone.

“I know you have your Unrivaled league coming up in the new year, but it would be great if you could come visit us during Thanksgiving or even Christmas,” Katie proposes as they near the end of their conversation. 

“I’ll take a look at my schedule and try to pull some strings, but no promises. I have plans to visit my dad and Drew over the Thanksgiving weekend in Maryland, so we’ll see what happens.” Paige replies, acknowledging the piece of her that wants to let the past go. The part where she was too close to Azzi and her family. She knows that visiting them means treading into foreign territory. 

“We miss you, Paige. Jon and Jose miss their ‘son’ too,” Katie laughs, relieving Paige of a heavy, bone-crushing weight on her heart. “Happy early birthday too, we could never forget. We love you, you’re still family to us.”

Paige smiles, a genuine ear-to-ear grin. “Love you too, Kaite. Tell the brothers and Tim I say hi as well.” She says before hanging up. 

“You’re still family to us.” The words rang in her head, warming her frozen heart. It wasn’t enough to thaw it, but it was enough to invoke thoughts of hope. She was torn from her reverie by a knock at her door. Humming to herself as she sauntered out of her bedroom, she opened the door to her apartment.

“Woah, I never thought I’d see you smiling like you’re on Disney Channel,” the blonde at the door laughs, surprised. Paige scowls at her words which prompts Cam to laugh harder. “I did bring breakfast though, knowing your current mental state. You look like shit, Paige.” She sets two paper bags on Paige’s kitchen island. They sit across each other on the spinning bar stools Cam loves. 

The two chat buoyantly; Cam tells her stories about her boyfriend, Ben, and his new obsession with cars or whatever. Paige doesn’t really pay attention to her rambling because of a painful ache in her heart. Even though it had been a year since Cam moved to Los Angeles, the two still learn new details about Over the past year, Cam used the fact that the shorter woman struggled to maintain a relationship for more than a few weeks as the butt of all her jokes. Despite being annoyed at first, Paige was quite amused with herself.

“Azzi’s mom called me earlier,” Paige abruptly says, interrupting Cam in her spiel about her brother’s recent breakup.

“...is that why you were smiling earlier? Paige, not even 5 days ago you made me-”

“From what I’ve…figured out, they haven’t been able to get in contact with Azzi. Katie seemed distraught when she accidentally brought her up.” 

“Are you implying that she got kidnapped?” Cam laughs uncomfortably, trying to avoid the weight of the situation. 

“It’s a possibility.” Paige mutters. Cam stops laughing and an uneasy silence drapes the room like a heavy curtain.

“I guess we’ll find out later, but don’t stress about it. You could be overthinking the entire situation. Don’t make that face, I know that you don’t want to go, but out of respect for your future teammate, you need to.” Cam sighs while rubbing circles on her temples. “I’m going to pick her and her supposed fiancé up at the airport. I’ll let you know how it goes.”

“Thanks for breakfast, Cam. Drive safe,” she calls out as the door to her apartment shuts. And suddenly, her mind is thrown back 5 years to the keychain that Azzi bought them in their early 20s as a gift. Drive safe, I need you here with me. I love you. 

***

“Azzi Fudd! This is Kendra Andrews with ESPN. What are your thoughts on the Sparks franchise?” 

“What prompted the move from New York to LA?” 

“How do you plan to integrate yourself into the team?” 

“What excites you the most about the LA Sparks franchise?”

Dozens of reporters and journalists surround her. They fight amongst each other to thrust microphones into her face. Sweat beads down the back of Azzi’s neck as she tries to answer as many questions as she can while being mindful of her fiancé’s limited patience. He had gone on his phone, ignoring Azzi as she drowns in a sea of cheap cologne and felt-tipped microphones. She quickly interrupts the reporters after 10 minutes and bid a polite farewell. Her heart stings with a bit of remorse when some of the reporters in the crowd express their frustration through whisper-shouts to their colleagues because they got a different answer than what they would’ve hoped. As she makes her way to her fiancé, her head hanging low, she mentally prepares herself for the incoming argument. 

“You’re a piece of shit,” her fiancé hisses, “you took ten fucking minutes to talk to some fans.”

“Please, not here. Not while the reporters are still around,” Azzi whispers, frantically scouting for reporters. 

“Save your bullshit for later. Call an Uber and get me out of here.” While leading her fiancé towards the airport exit, Azzi picks at her cuticles. “Oh, and next time,” her fiancé continues, “don’t be a pussy-sucking people pleaser and just give them an autograph. I don’t have the time for this, there are better things I should be doing that does not include waiting for you.” Tears begin to well but she blinks them back, trying to put up a facade for the public as she smiles half-heartedly for selfies. The lump in her throat threatens to roll out of her mouth. The thought of a night in the hotel sends a cold bead of sweat down her back. She doesn’t want to be left alone with her fiancé. She doesn’t trust him. 

A firm hand grabs Azzi’s wrist, pulling her back into the present. She rips her hand away reflexively before processing the familiar face that belonged to her temporary roommate in Belarus. For the first time since she left New York, Azzi breaks out in a full-faced smile and throws herself into Cam’s open arms.

Her mind wanders to the other future WNBA teammate, who she had not seen since the 2025 WNBA draft. The thought of her quickened her heart, but the feeling sours when she becomes aware of her fiancé by her side. 

“I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever, oh my god,” Cam laughs, punching Azzi’s arm lightly, a gesture from her USA basketball days when Coach Berube made an off-handed comment. She flinches in response, which Cam chooses to ignore. “Oh, and you must be Azzi’s fiancé. I’ve heard so much about you, and it’s so nice to meet you. I’m Cam,” the blonde chirps, turning her attention to Azzi’s fiancé, offering a friendly smile and a hand. “I don’t think I ever got your name.” Her fiancé remains silent, but his jaw muscles tighten and his cold, green eyes look at her with animosity and spite. Not wanting to raise suspicion, Cam plasters a smile and leads them to her car.

Cam makes a mental note to tell Paige about their interaction with an emphasis on the flinch. 

“...This is the Uber you ordered?” her fiancé snarls when the other woman is out of earshot. 

“You need to calm down. She’s my teammate, and this is a thoughtful gesture,” Azzi retorts before covering her mouth. Her breathing becomes shallow and her face pales as her fiancé inches his face closer to her ear until his hot, rancid breath drowns out her awareness of everything around her. The hustling environment of the airport disappears and her world is engulfed in silence until four words snap her out of her trance. 

“Drop this shit, now.” 

***

The ride to the hotel where the two would be temporarily staying was brisk, although Azzi wished it would have lasted longer. The brunettes reminisced on their college days while laughing hysterically. 

“Have you talked to Geno after he finally retired?” Cam asks playfully, making eye contact with Azzi through the rear-view mirror. Instead of Azzi’s warm brown eyes, she meets her fiancé’s swampy green eyes. The blonde feels a chill run down her spine, unable to detect any emotion on the fiancé’s face. 

“Nope, not at all.” Cam raises her eyebrows, clearly amused. 

“Wow, it’s been two years since he retired. He even went to the draft to support you and, um, nevermind.” The blonde shakes her head, cursing to herself. Azzi laughs awkwardly, trying to lift the guilt off her friend’s shoulders, but her fiancé is unamused. “About time though, I thought that he nearly got a heart attack during the March Madness championship in 2025.” The two erupt in laughter, tears falling from their eyes. Her fiancé glares at Cam through the mirror, prompting her to awkwardly change the topic to the Sparks and their team culture. Azzi ignores the glare and continues her conversation with her friend. 

Her fiancé isn’t completely out of the loop despite his apathy towards Azzi’s WNBA career. He knows who Paige Bueckers is, the national championship they won in 2025, but he only vaguely knows about the relationship that she and Azzi shared during their collegiate campaigns. If their relationship was an iceberg, her fiancé only sees the tip of the iceberg, the visible part that the media shared, the two in a million SLAM cover, their rise to stardom in USA U16 basketball, and most importantly, their adversities through injury together. What she doesn’t know is the true depth and complexity of their relationship, veiled beneath a thick layer of dark, murky water that neither she nor Paige are ready to uncover. As their lives began to diverge, so did the currents in the water; they pushed and pushed on their relationship until it came crumbling down, splitting the iceberg into two parts that are now just Azzi and just Paige. 

Thanking Cam as they slip out of the car, Azzi checks into the hotel room where she and her fiancé sit on opposite sides of the king-sized bed. Her head hangs and she looks at her hands before her fiancé breaks the silence first.

“Hey,” he sighs, walking over to Azzi. When she lifts her head to meet her fiancé’s eyes, branches of tears stream from her eyes and down her cheeks, splitting into multitudes of different directions. 

“Am I not good enough for you? One moment you hate me, and the next you’re suddenly in love with me again.” Azzi sobs, pulling her hair in frustration. “I’m trying my hardest, and it hurts when you don’t reciprocate the feelings.” She wipes her eyes while her fiancé stares at her in disbelief, masking his anger. He paces to the door before walking back to Azzi, feigning an empathetic look. 

“No, baby, you’re perfect.” Her fiancé mutters , pulling the brunette’s head to his chest as he kisses her forehead softly while wiping her tears. “I love you so much. I appreciate everything you do.” Azzi could feel that his words felt wrong and uncomfortable coming out of his mouth. 

“Love you too”

***

Paige walks in circles around her room while Cam summarizes the airport pickup, sprawled out on the blonde’s bed. “You didn’t even get his name. Damn.” Paige’s voice is laced with worry. 

“All you need to know is that her fiancé is fucking weird. He was like ‘I’m so sick of this bullshit’ the whole time without speaking a single word. I introduced myself to him like a normal fucking person and he stood there and stared me down, as if I was competition or something.” Cam breathes, putting her face in her hands. Paige feels the same, unable to piece together the puzzling situation. “This whole situation is  crazy. I was talking about Geno’s retirement and she hasn’t talked to him in years. Isn’t that weird? I feel like he’s also the jealous type. She wore your Hopkins hoodie and her fiancé kept eyeing it the whole time.”

Paige’s heart skips a beat at her words. Her Hopkins hoodie. The one from the night in Belarus: even though it had been over 10 years, Paige remembers it clearly. It was the first time she was in love. “That’s weird. You picked them up from the airport, and he was glaring at you the entire time in the car. Then, you- like, jokingly punched her. How hard was this punch?”

“KK-punching-Ice-after-losing-a-bet-about-your-life hard.” 

“Okay, so not that hard.”

“I’m pretty sure I heard her fiancé call her a stuck-up pussy eater while they argued about the reporters before I picked them up.” Paige raises an eyebrow at the statement before coughing awkwardly, mumbling under her breath.

“Just– be careful Paige. She isn’t yours anymore. I know you’re still not over her,” She winces at her friend’s words, “and it’s the harsh truth, but I seriously think that you need to find someone else to distract you.” 

“We both know that finding someone else hasn’t worked for me either. I’m worried about her. She’s my best friend, my ride or die.”

“She betrayed you. You need to move on. Best friends don’t betray each other like… that.”

***

Flanked by her fiancé, Azzi walks through the large, wooden doors of the restaurant next to her hotel. It was a short walk, but she took in the salty smell of the city. The breeze was sharp and it nipped her exposed arms. She was shivering and rubbing her hands up and down her arms. 

“You must be Ms. Fudd,” the waitress waiting for her arrival smiles at her, “your table is over here, please follow me.”  The short walk through the labyrinth of tables set with velvety red cloths that had a golden trim on its edges was interrupted by a crimson-colored curtain. The chatter behind the curtains feels daunting, and she wants to turn around and run back to Arlington. The waitress pulls the curtain to the side to reveal a table full with people, her teammates, laughing and talking boisterously amongst themselves. The first person to stand up is Cam, who embraces her in a loose hug. Seconds later, nearly all of her new teammates have thrown themselves into her arms.

The last person to stand up is the blonde. Her wavy, blonde hair, lighter from the Californian sun, is tucked behind her ears and falls down her back like a loose shawl. Her skin glows gold against the yellow lighting of the dining room. She wears a freshly ironed button-up dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up to expose her toned forearms. Only the right side of her shirt was tucked into her brown trousers that hang loosely from her hip, ghosting her ankles. A beige bomber jacket that matches her pants is slung around her shoulders and a watercolor-patterned scarf is draped around her neck. The gold studs and helix ring on her left ear reflect the light of the chandelier that hangs from chains above the dining table. When their eyes meet, Azzi searches her eyes for a sense of comfort in her familiar blue eyes that her dark mascara emphasizes. Instead, she finds nothing in her cold and emotionless eyes. Paige embraces her new teammate in a stiff and loose hug, her muscles tense when Azzi’s hands roam her back. Immediately, she is engulfed in her rosy perfume, the same scent that she finds solace and comfort in. Her stomach churns, yet there is a certain warmth that flickers in her heart. Everything about the blonde screamed Paige, and Paige is beautiful. 

“Welcome to LA,” she says while pulling out of the hug. Refusing to look at her, she turns to the man looming in the corner while offering a hand. At the table, Cam sucks a sharp breath in, casting a warning glance at Paige which is ignored. Azzi stiffens and her heart hammers. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Paige, and you are?”

“I’m Charles,” he murmurs, accepting the handshake and offering a small, sly smile. Azzi’s eyes widen. Her fiancé is rarely friendly, especially not to Paige. They glare at each other for a brief moment before she takes a seat next to Cam. 

Her fiancé and her sit side-by-side at the table, across from Paige and Cam. Charles slides his hand into Azzi’s under the table, squeezing it softly. The small gesture makes Azzi smile as she leans into her fiancé, enjoying his comforting presence. It isn’t much, but it’s enough to take her mind off of the blonde sitting directly across from her, laughing with her WNBA teammates. It annoys her.

Azzi is selfish. 

***

The entire table has some sort of alcoholic beverage in their hands or in their stomachs. Paige sits awkwardly, sipping a Shirley Temple whose sugary and overly sweet grenadine has become bitter on her tongue. Nausea seeps into the edges of her head and begins to spread like wildfire and she finds herself rubbing circles on her forehead. She can’t stand the sound of Azzi’s bubbly laughter across the table. The sound that threatened to burn a hole through her heart. 

“So, how did you guys meet?” Dijonai Carrington cocks an eyebrow at the couple while swirling her cocktail in her cup. 

A brief panicked look flashes across Azzi’s face before Charles cuts in. “We met in college.” His answer is curt and dry, yet polite. Several of her teammates cooed at his response, gushing over the couple. The two women jump into a conversation about their college lovers. 

That should’ve been me.

“What a fucking people pleaser.” Paige snickers to Cam while blinking back the unwelcome moisture that began to form under her eyes. She throws back the rest of her drink before dropping her head into her arms.

“Are you sure you don’t want any alcohol? Like, a thousand percent positive?” Dearica Hamby, the star forward of the Valkyries asks Paige while rubbing the taller woman’s back. Through the seemingly innocent image of the question, she notices genuine concern painted in the woman’s softened eyes.

“She’s alright without it,” Cam answers before she could open her mouth. “We made an agreement that she would have no alcohol tonight because I had to clean up after her last time.” The entire table howls in laughter, and Paige joins them with a half-hearted smile while heart fractures. 

If her smile didn’t split into a frown at the corners of her mouth or her chin didn’t wrinkle, Azzi’s heart wouldn’t have stopped and she would’ve been laughing with her teammates. 

“Yeah, I had to show up to her apartment with shoes and a shit load of candy because I felt so guilty.” She sneaks a glance at the brunette sitting across from her. Instead of laughing with the team, she was engaged in a conversation with her fiancé, prompting her to avert her gaze. It takes every piece of her dignity not to stare at the brunette. Her dark, curly hair is braided and hangs just above her shoulders; the same hairstyle that she jokingly called a bob back in their college days. She wears a baby blue knitted tank that reveals her muscular arms and white, flowy linen pants that hug her hips. 

However, when Paige’s eyes pass by the soon-to-be married couple, searching for something, they follow the pattern of their intertwined arms and hands hidden under the table. Looking at Cam, she whispers, “I need to get out of here.” the taller woman waves a hand at her, signaling for her to go ahead. She files through her wallet and grabs a few hundred-dollar bills and hands them to Cam, which she graciously accepts. Dearica flashes her a sympathetic look before returning to her drinking game. 

“I got a call from my mom and I gotta take it. I’ll be right back.” Announcing to the table, she grabs her phone and stands up, stepping over her drunk and overly rowdy teammates. When she finally slips behind the thick velvet curtain, she finally feels as if she can breathe. The curtain has become a barrier between her and a certain pair of brown eyes that burns holes through the back of her head. She knows that man. The blur of dark curls and olive and brown skin became too vivid. She needs to get out. It hurts her. 

Paige is protective. 

*** 

The neat blonde bun disappears behind the curtain with a soft, almost inaudible swoosh. She tries to talk with her teammates, laughing at their jokes, but everything feels forced. The image of Paige's stiff posture and the death grip she had on her phone haunts her. All of a sudden, her fiancé’s once soft hand feels heavy and scratchy against her skin.

“I need some air. I’ll be right back,” She announces as she gets up, dropping her fiancé’s hand. Cam and Dearica pause their argument over their stupid drinking game and stare at her with their mouths agape. There is undeniable panic swirling in both pairs of wide-open eyes, but Cam gives a hesitant nod.  

“Is everything alright babe?” Charles’s voice is soft but urgent. “I can come with you.” Azzi looks at him with a warm smile before giving him a quick kiss on the cheek. 

As she exits the restaurant, she is met with an intricate spectacle of orange, pink, and blue. The light of the day quickly disappears, but she discerns a hunched silhouette on the beach that glows under the golden light. Her attention shifts to the orange circle that barely peeks out through the edge of the horizon as it slowly sinks underneath the water, leaving a trail of orange and pink light rippling across the surface of the water. Waves crash loudly against the shore before they are drawn back to the ocean while laughter and joyful screams from children join the peaceful ambience. 

“Are you just gonna stand there or do you wanna sit?” A tired voice rips her out of her thoughts as she tears her gaze from the astonishing scene in front of her. She glances at the woman sitting next to her who has her knees up to her chest and her head resting on her forearms. Azzi decides to sit a few feet away from her. For a split second, it feels like their fragmented friendship could be salvaged again. 

She slips her sandals off and lets her feet absorb the texture of the flaky sand while shivering when a gust of wind hits her skin. Instead of ignoring the mechanical sound of teeth chattering, Paige shakes the jacket off her shoulders and hands it to her which Azzi graciously accepts. When she wraps it around her shoulders, she is engulfed in the aroma of roses again. 

“I thought you had a call to take,” Azzi remarks, her voice soft. Veins snake down the woman’s arms and hands until they disappear behind her knuckles. Her pale skin had become golden and her biceps protrude from the rest of her arm. The neat braids in her hair are now ruffled and frizzy, and small wisps of hair dance with the breeze. On her wrist is a beaded bracelet that reads “RESILIENCE.” The bracelet from her camp before their explosive argument. The sight of it makes her heart flutter, but when she reaches her face, a cold wave of dread washes over her as she notices the smeared mascara and faint patches of salty skin on her cheeks. 

“Yeah, I did.” Paige answers bluntly, her voice cracking slightly. An uncomfortable silence falls upon them; the air heavy from their unspoken words. Azzi’s heart throbs at her cold tone. “What brings you out here?” she asks after a few moments. 

“I felt nauseous.” Paige scoffs at her response, shaking her head. 

“Bullshit.” 

“Paige, why are you so fucking blunt?” Azzi exasperates, throwing her hands up in the air in surrender. “You hugged me earlier and that whole time, you were stiff as a rock. It’s been 3 fucking years, it’s time to grow the fuck up.” When Paige says nothing in response, Azzi continues. “I’m trying to be the bigger person here and you’re being unfair. I told you that we can stay friends and then you fucking gho-”

“Your fiancé,” the blonde sneers, tearing Azzi out of her rant. Her voice is shaky and dangerously close to breaking. Through the golden light, she can see the tears brimming behind her smudged eyelashes. “He’s the one that you met at Ted’s, right?” Azzi stays silent, giving Paige the confirmation she needed. “You’re not being the bigger person, not at all. You’re only talking to me because you want something out of me. Azzi, you’re being selfish.”  The last word hits Azzi like a cold bucket of water. 

“You’re being unfair,” Azzi says shakily, refusing to meet the blonde’s eyes. 

Paige lets out a strangled sputter before opening her mouth. “I’m being unfair? Me being mad over you getting cozy with another man after our natty suddenly means that I’m being unfair?” 

“No, that’s not what I meant. You’re being unfair because you’re hurting him with your comments. Do you think I can’t hear the derogatory names you’ve called him tonight?” Azzi scrunches her face and turns to the blonde, whose attention is on the sand that snakes between her toes. 

“Are you happy?” the older woman finally asks after a period of silence.

“I don’t know.”

“What?” Her blue eyes dart towards hers. 

“P.” Paige freezes at the use of her nickname, “I miss you. My offer still stands. We can go back to our friendship.” The last words are quiet, almost as if they aren’t supposed to be spoken. Memories of what they were rush through both of their minds. The women have something unreadable in both of their eyes as they stare at each other. 

“No, we.. we can’t.” Paige finally speaks, tearing her gaze away from her, letting out a shaky breath and gets up to leave, but before she can take a step forward, she feels a forceful hand clasp around her wrist that prompts a wave of panic to flood through her. “Azzi, let me go. You can’t do this. You’re getting married soon for god’s sake.”  

“Our last night in Belarus, I know you remember it. You wear the same perfume, you even gave me your hoodie. Shit, Paige, that was the time I knew that I fell in love with you. Every little thing you did for me felt like you were giving me your entire world. You fell in love with me too. Every argument we had, we made up, and we can make up from this too. I’m asking you to believe in us again. I won’t leave you.” For a split second, Paige’s eyes soften and she lets her walls down. She desperately wants to let go of her "tough guy" facade and let herself taste Azzi's lips again.

“No. You don’t get to say that now. Not when you have a fiancé waiting for you in the restaurant.” The vulnerability that Paige showed is once again blocked by the ramparts of her castle. The remembrance of Charles’s presence hits Azzi like an 18-wheeler. “It’s evident that you can’t own up to any of the mistakes that you made.” 

“You’re not taking any accountability for it either! Do you think I haven’t tried?” Paige flinches, backing away from Azzi who is now screaming. “You had to address it at the fucking draft. For fuck’s sake, let me explain my side of the story.” 

“I tried to give you space because clearly, you wanted to fuck around with him. You don’t get to explain your side of the story. It was the night of the March Madness championship and you ch-”

“Oh, shit.” A new voice joins their argument. Paige whips her head around and sees Dearica and Cameron looking at them with wide eyes. “Azzi, I don’t think you should-” 

“No it’s okay,” Paige feigns a smile before pulling out of Azzi’s grip. “Welcome to the City of Dreams, Azzi. I’m sorry for having to leave so abruptly.” 

And she’s gone. Packed away in the backseat of an Uber. It hurts Azzi more than it should. The doors to Paige’s heart that used to be held open for Azzi are now barricaded off, isolating her. 

“What the fuck happened?” The blonde turns to Azzi with an edge of hostility in her tone. Dearica glares at her, and Azzi’s heart free-falls into her stomach. 

“Azzi?!” Charles’s deep voice calls out, and Azzi is grateful to be saved from the awkward confrontation. When his eyes land on her, they soften and he wraps her into a tight embrace. Every piece of contact between them feels scratchy and uncomfortable, especially in Paige’s jacket. “Don’t fucking leave me again.” He snarls into her ear before glaring at her jacket. 

The other women turn to leave before exchanging an uncomfortable look with each other. 

***

An empty bottle of tequila is the only company Paige has on her bar table. Right as she lets the effects of the alcohol take her consciousness, her front door flies open. Every muscle in her body tenses and she buries her head into her arms in hopes that she will disappear. 

“P?” It’s Cam. Her body relaxes. 

A second pair of heavy footsteps make their way to the table. She stiffens again.

“It’s me, don’t worry. You’re alright” The other voice belongs to Dearica. She exhales and looks up. Cam’s eyes are fixed on the empty bottle of tequila and a heavy breath falls out of her mouth. 

“Again? Seriously, Paige?” When Paige puts her head back down into her arms, Cam’s hands rub her back. 

“Yeah. Again.” Sobs begin to wreck the blonde’s body and she shakes violently. Dearica and Cam exchange a panicked look before embracing their teammate. 

“I’m sorry, Paige. What she did is fucked up” Dearica’s voice is soft and reassuring. “We tried to talk to her but, her, um, we were interrupted.” She and Cam are walking on thin ice; one bad step and their teammate will plunge in the freezing cold water.

“Let’s get you to bed. You have a big day tomorrow, so let’s make the most out of it.” Cam and Dearica carry their teammate, whose body is shaking violently while sobbing to bed.

For the 5th night in a row, she cries herself to sleep. 

I need you.

***

“Charles, why do you want to marry me?”

“Because I love you baby, and I want to spend every second of my life with you. With us.”

“...Okay.”

“I promise I’ll never hurt you. I’ll be the one to protect you forever.” 

“Azzi Fudd. What the fuck was that?” Charles sneers. His emerald eyes are alive, burning with acrimony. She doesn’t look up from her phone screen where her fingers shakily hover over the call button under Paige’s name. 

“I’m sorry? I told you I was getting some air and I ran into Paige.” Her tone is surprisingly even and steady despite her trembling body. When a dark look falls across his face, she shudders. Suddenly, her phone is ripped from her hands and shattered against the wall with a loud smash that rings in her ears.

“Don’t fucking talk back to me. You saw what happened to your phone, and I know that you don’t want to be next.” He slams the door of their hotel room and stomps down the hall. When she doesn't hear the obnoxiously loud footsteps anymore, she allows her body to collapse and cries into her pillow while she thinks about the promises that they made on their engagement night.

I need you.

[preseriesdean]

for @spnficrecfest day ten 🧡

2x05 SIMON SAID

have a cigar by deadlybride 5.6k words, rated E, published 2020 What happened with Andy and Ansem unsettles Sam. Dean doesn't seem worried.

2x14 HOUSES OF THE HOLY

The real green thing will come by victoria_p 1k words, rated T, published 2007 He'd like to blame the whiskey, but he thinks it's more than that, this whatever-it-is between them that's been there for years.

2x20 WHAT IS AND WHAT SHOULD NEVER BE + 2x22 ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE

Worthless cartography by Goshen / applecrumbledore 15.6k words, rated E, published 2022 Dean didn’t know what finally made him go for it. The djinn’s dream was a catalyst, but the call was coming from inside the house, and he’d been letting it ring for a very, very long time. (They get one night together right before Sam is taken to Cold Oak. Dean has to deal with that.)

2x22 ALL HELL BREAKS LOOSE

When I Fall Asleep it Is Your Eyes That Close by britomart_is 1.9k words, rated E, published 2009 Sam is alive. Dean is happy.

3x11 MYSTERY SPOT

North of Wednesday by Mollyamory 3.5k words, rated G, published 2008 Sam's behind the wheel before he realizes he doesn't have the keys. Dean does. There should be another cheesy eighties song coming on any second, because it's like he wakes up again, without ever falling asleep.

This Fortress Made of Us by mickeym 10.8k words, rated E, published 2009 Sam really didn't do very well without his brother.

What Went Wrong Yesterday by SinnamonSpider 16.2k words, rated E, published 2017 With Broward County in their rearview and a new case in their laps, Sam struggles to come to terms with the six months he spent alone after Dean’s death - and the fact that it never happened at all. And on top of it all, he now has to deal with the feelings for his brother that have been dragged to the surface.

4x17 IT'S A TERRIBLE LIFE

How Many Floors to Realize by lazy_daze 26.2k words, rated E, published 2009 In which Zachariah decides to keep stringing them along a little while longer, because damn if they aren't somewhat entertaining, right?

5x01 SYMPATHY FOR THE DEVIL

Lesser Evils by Dyed_Red 9.3k words, rated E, published 2020, non-con “So you’re just gonna, what – torture us for an hour while your guys hightail it to Buffalo? That’s your master plan here?” “Oh I can do a lot in an hour or two, Sammy. Like having your surrogate daddy here carve Dean a new face. Like backsliding you off your pretty bandwagon. Like…Seeing how far big brother will go for his sweet baby Sam.”

5x04 THE END

Further than a Ship, Faster Than a Bomb by queenklu 622 words, rated M, published 2010 Set during 5x04, when there was a glorious moment of two Dean Winchesters at the same time. "You left him."

5x14 MY BLOODY VALENTINE

The Heart of Life by queenklu 626 words, rated T, published 2010 A Vonnegut Valentine.

5x18 POINT OF NO RETURN

the tabernacle reconstructed by redmyeyes 2.9k words, rated M, published 2022 They pulled on clothes, afterwards.

6x18 FRONTIERLAND

You Have One Saved Message by killabeez 3.1k words, rated T, published 2011 Sam gets a new smart phone.

6x22 THE MAN WHO KNEW TOO MUCH

These Things I Know Are True by killabeez 4.6k words, rated E, published 2011 Cas is off the rails, Sam's barely keeping it together, and Dean's trying to figure out where they go from here.

8x21 THE GREAT ESCAPIST

Last Temptation by merle_p 3k words, rated M, published 2021 Sam is running a fever again, the kind of fever no Ibuprofen or cold compress will bring down, the kind of fever that is eating him up alive, eviscerating him from the inside. He is too hot and too cold and too pale, delirious and shaking, resonating with whatever divine energy the trials are subjecting him to, and Dean is not sure how much longer he can stand to see him be in this state.

10x12 ABOUT A BOY

capitulation by deadlybride 8.5k words, rated E, published 2018 When they don't manage to turn Dean back into his adult self, Sam spends a month researching how to fix it.

Betelgeuse by hellhoundsprey 2.8k words, rated E, published 2020 The hex bag never burned.

Telescope by doctor_idiot 7k words, rated E, published 2017 Sam stares at his brother in his baggie hoodie with the rolled-up up sleeves and he wants to cry.

11x17 RED MEAT

Chosen by killabeez 2.5k words, rated E, published 2016, mcd This might be their last night on earth, so Sam figures, what the hell.

[hkthatgffan]

Well, today's the day! Hilda comes to an end. I figured now more than ever is time I make this post on just…how I feel about this incredible show ending and why it means so much to me…and why I'm grateful to Luke Pearson and the whole Hilda team. So, long post below ahead!

I found Hilda in 2018 via a post on the Gravity Falls sub of the trailer. Right from the start, something felt special about this show. And like many, I tuned in to watch it when it began. I didn't know what would be in store as I began it, but I was excited. This was at the end of the summer as GF hype for Lost Legends and the box set died down. So, getting in to a new show seemed like the best idea. It took literally hearing that theme song for me to instantly fall in love with Hilda. There was something so familiar and wholesome just bursting out of that opening. It was a feeling hard to really explain. By episode 3 and specifically the ending of it…I knew I had my next favourite show.

Everything about Hilda just felt perfect to me. The animation was incredible, Hilda as a character was enjoyable and full of life, the story felt fresh even if the core concept seemed familiar and all in all, I just loved the atmosphere this show radiated. It also made me so happy to see Canada have a part in Hilda. The Canadian animation industry is one I love given how much of a part of my childhood it was. And so to see it have a hand in this incredible show just made me so happy. Mercury Filmworks did amazing with Hilda. And I think that's how I began to understand why Hilda feels so familiar; it reminds me of those old cartoons I grew up on. Those Canadian Nelvana shows that were so wholesome & yet so fun to watch…while also not afraid to be bold. Hilda was that kind of show for a new generation!

I also didn't shy away from poking some nods to Gravity Falls. It was a great way to help spread Hilda's existence to more people and to this day I get messages from people who tell me they found Hilda because of my tweets, or videos or more. That means the world and I am grateful to have helped you discover this show. And like any show I fell in love with, I also bough the books and other merch for it. The Hilda graphic novels were amazing to read and see how the show grew from them, the figurine still just fits in my shelf, and the tie in books and more are always fun to collect. I'll miss it. Not to mention the memes…of which I made a few. The Hilda fandom is insane, yet so funny. Like all fandoms it has its ups and downs but I've met some amazing people because of Hilda and some who I remain great friends with. You know who you are <3

Hilda's conclusion means that the last of my holy trinity shows is now over…and with that, the end of an era. Truthfully, IDK what my plans are post Hilda. It was the last show still airing that I truly was 110% passionate about. That's not to say there aren't other shows, But there will never be another Hilda for me. Hilda is a show unlike any other I have seen. Yeah, perhaps it's not the most popular or the biggest or the best cartoon out there. But OMG, no other show since ever made me as happy and passionate as Hilda did. It's one of a kind!

I said in 2018 that Hilda is everything out of a cartoon that I wanted. I still believe that.

No cartoon is perfect and our definition of perfection is our own. If you ask me though…Hilda is the closest cartoon I have ever come across to my definition of perfection!

With that, while I am heartbroken to bid farewell to Hilda…I am happy I got to experience this show as it aired. I'm grateful for all the memories I made in the 5 years I had it. I'm grateful for the adventure and above all else…I'm grateful to have seen Hilda! ❤️

2018-2023

[aydaptic]

Hey,

I know that might be a bit weird but I just wanted to say how much I appreciate you and your work. Your writing style is so good and the webcomic and your art progress is so cool. Your work is like one of my safe places, whenever I'm feeling down I go read it.

Just wanted to say that and I hope you know how much you are appreciated. Sending so much love to you.

Hi there ����

Not weird at all. I appreciate the kind words -- way more than you think -- and I legit mean that. As sad as it might sound, my Alive series in general (and engaging with its readers) has pretty much been my main source of happiness ever since I started the journey way back in 2018.

I'm ecstatic that my works are a safe space for you. Blessed that there are ppl out there (at all) who enjoy what I do when I'm so disconnected from the fandom. Hearing others look forward to updates, leave comments, DM me, give me fanart, support me financially in any small amount, overall just talk about my works with friends/me and/or publicly, etc. means the world to me.

Contrary to popular belief (when it comes to ppl who know I exist,) I'm a less-known creator. The popularity of A&E (WebComic | Fanfic) is happenstance. I know ppl are afraid to DM me bc they think I don't have time for them -- they believe that I get dozens of DMs every day when I'm lucky to get a single one in a year -- and it's very sad. I love to talk to my readers about my works being why I reply to every single comment. Many of them in detail. The number of times I've gotten a "holy PHCK I had no idea you would reply" is heartbreaking, ngl. That said... I'm not blind to the fact of how fortunate I am that ppl are engaging with my work at all.

Much love to you as well for this lovely message!

[madhogthymaster]

Brain Bubble: I Need to Seriously Gush About Unicorn Wars

I need to seriously gush about Unicorn Wars, from the makers of the extremely memorable Psiconautas, Los Niños Olvidados. It is NOTHING like the advertisement implied it to be. It's a complete subversion and I am positively reeling. This is how I feel right now!

Imagine a commentary on how the army traumatizes children into becoming killers, a la Full Metal Jacket, plus the use of religious fervor as a propaganda tool that fetishizes war as holy and righteous. Now, imagine if all that turned into 2018's Annihilation.

Are you picturing it? Okay, good.

Unicorn Wars has SOMETHING to say about the military-industrial complex, fascism and myth-making (it's not subtle about it) but it is also the somewhat intimate journey of a mind twisted by resentment and trauma, using aggressive Psychedelia as its backdrop. However, what it is ULTIMATELY about is so unbelievably heavy handed yet gloriously high concept that I cannot help but applaud. I clap and holler at the sheer audacity of this violent Carebears cartoon going as hard as humanly possible with its parting message. Having watched Psiconautas back in the day, I came into this with certain expectations. I expected gorgeous animation and grody brutality. I expected a juxtaposition between cute, cuddly characters and gory death, a depressing tone all throughout.

It certainly was all that but multiplied tenfold, with a more cohesive thematic and narrative throughline. You must trash your preconceived notions of what animated filmmaking can or should be before entering the house that Birdboy built. Unicorn Wars is not simply Apocalypse Now by way of Happy Tree Friends. That is only the initial hook, the bold-faced lie spouted by a deceptive trailer, but that hook will turn into a nasty haymaker to your gut before you even realize it. It shall make you vomit well-animated rainbows and piss purple...

Watch it!

[strangesmallbard]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love 💗

OH MAN….let’s see!

1. The Problem With Sending Messages - Teixcalaan Series.

written in 2021, this is a teixcalaan series epistolary fic in which three seagrass spends 6.4k words trying and failing to send mahit dzmare one (1) email. i experimented a lot with form and style, and i’m still wildly proud of the results!! also very happy with how i wrote three seagrass’ characterization.

2. Sounds Like Something Breaking - Once Upon a Time

written in 2013 (holy shit lmao), this is a canon-divergent au where cora lives after getting her heart back + her and regina try to rebuild their relationship afterwards (also swan queen). even though my writing has definitely improved, i’m still very fond of this fic and grateful for the fandom connections i’ve made as a domino-effect result.

3. love, let my nightmares turn into dreams - His Dark Materials

written in 2020, this is a post-canon au where the abyss drops marisa in mary’s world without her daemon, and they eventually fall in love years later. i loved exploring what an emotionally healthy version of marisa might look like, realistically, plus developing how marisa/mary would communicate in a relationship. (long live mariysa we made that surprise three minute scene WORK for us)

4. ‘cause i love you, a bushel and a chlorophyllum molybdites - Motherland: Fort Salem

written literally a few weeks ago, this is a post s3 fic that just explores how talder negotiates a long-term committed relationship. has some of my favorite romance + comedy writing i’ve done in a while. i also started this fic in the hospital while recovering from emergency orthopedic ankle surgery, so it just has a. Very special place in my heart now LMAO

5. the mountain troll - The Worst Witch

started in 2018, this au follows mildred hubble in her third year at cackle’s academy, figuring out her place in the witching world, Dealing With Ethel, and watching her mom and ms. hardbroom develop a bewildering friendship (that may just turn into something more!) i don’t know if i’ll ever be able to finish this fic but omg it has such a special place in my heart! and so does everyone who left a kind, encouraging comment on it 💜

(special mentions also include: we were in the gold room, and once upon a time, there was)

[ao3feed-irondadspiderson]

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43944750

holy moly (it's a real do-nothing day) by RJam9 (i could change address and try another state, i could change my name, it won't do anything) - The school year has managed to continue on without incident, even with the Rogue Avengers having officially been pardoned. However, what is more important is that the Midtown High Academic Decathlon Team won their national competition. Technically, they don’t get any awards other than boring money stuff from it, which — when Tony Stark hears about it — he intends to rectify. Which means they get a special, end-of-the-year field trip to Stark Industries on the behalf of Tony’s two interns; Peter Parker and Harley Keener. Peter is not enjoying this. Harley might be enjoying this a bit too much. - (or, since i’ve technically already done a twitter fic, i’m tackling the next biggest trope in irondad content — welcome to the mandatory field trip fic, everybody!) Words: 36569, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 4 of i'll become a trumpet or a drumset (in a sad orchestra) Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: Gen Characters: Peter Parker, Harley Keener, Tony Stark, Cindy Moon, Sally Avril, Abe Brown, Charles Murphy (Marvel), Betty Brant, Flash Thompson, Michelle Jones, Ned Leeds, Roger Harrington, Happy Hogan, Minor Original Characters - Character, (default enemies family members workers), others mentioned and cameos Relationships: Harley Keener & Peter Parker, Harley Keener & Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Academic Decathlon Team (Spider-Man: Homecoming) & Peter Parker, Sally Avril & Cindy Moon, Abe Brown & Charles Murphy, Roger Harrington & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Harley Keener & Tony Stark Additional Tags: Post-Spider-Man: Homecoming, Pre-Movie: Avengers: Infinity War (2018), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, aka iw is never happening here never ever ever, Humor, Attempt at Humor, out of character warning bc idc, Ironbrothers, Ironfamily, Harley Keener & Peter Parker Friendship, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Acting as Harley Keener's Parental Figure, POV Outsider, Peter Parker's Field Trip to Stark Industries, i cant believe thats a tag now, Peter Parker is a Little Shit, Harley Keener is a little shit, theyre such assholes, Gun Violence, Canon-Typical Violence, Banter, Swearing, Texting, Chatting & Messaging, Twitter, Social Media, i am expanding bitches, i am also insane if you cant tell, no beta we break up like the avengers. like a band

[thewahookid]

March 6 - Our Lady of Graces ( Padua, Italy, 1630)

A singer gives back after miraculous healing by Our Lady of Guadalupe

Rosy Oros, a Mexican immigrant from Santa Maria, California, told Angelus News that she has always loved singing. Though she never became a well-known singer, she has worked extensively in the TV, radio, and recording industries.

This year, Oros was given the opportunity to sing at the annual “Las Mañanitas” celebration in Los Angeles in honor of Our Lady of Guadalupe on December 11. The celebration included Aztec and folk dances, veneration of a relic of St. Juan Diego’s tilma, the rosary, midnight Mass, and songs sung individually by Oros and six other guest singers.

“I am so humbled and blessed to be able to stand there and in my own simple way give thanks to the Virgin,” Oros told Angelus News. “It may seem insignificant but I know that she is receiving it with a lot of love and that it makes her happy, because she knows my heart. She interceded for me to live. We always look for the opportunity to thank her and to be in communion with her.”

In 2018, Oros suddenly went into septic shock after a medical procedure, which left her in a coma. Afterwards, she suffered a cerebral thrombosis and additional internal and external bleeding. Doctors gave her a 2% chance of survival.

Oros said that Our Lady of Guadalupe played a pivotal role in her healing. The clinic where she spent the early days of her recovery was named for Our Lady of Guadalupe. A prayer group also told Oros and her husband that they received messages of healing from Mary.

“She said ‘I am with you, do not be afraid,’” Oros said. “‘You will heal from this but we will do this together, facing the sanctuary.’ In other words, she wanted me to get closer to her Son while holding her by the hand.”

Oros said that one day she opened her eyes and saw two brown eyes looking back at her.

“Those eyes belonged to an image of Our Lady of Guadalupe hanging just a few feet away, at once filling her heart with love and hope that the Virgin Mary she’d held dear since childhood would intercede with Jesus to help her make it out of the clinic alive,” Angelus News reported.

After that, Oros and her husband looked for ways to thank Our Lady for the miraculous healing. Oros said that both of them are now more devoted to the rosary, Jesus, and the Catholic Church, and they often make pilgrimages to the Basilica of Guadalupe in Mexico.

Hannah Hiester, December 21, 2023

www.catholicvote.org

Hail, Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with you; blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

[whatsonmedia]

Film Friday: 5 selected Movies this week!

WhatsOn editorial Rufaiath has selected this week’s top movies for you. Watching movies is the finest way to utilize time, especially when the weekend is just around the corner. Holidays require some downtime, so if there’s a movie on the side, why not watch it? Without further ado, let’s look at the films on the list. My Name Is Vendetta My Name Is Vendetta gives you a stable revenge tale that brings grounded fight sequences and sturdy emotional recognition to its narrative. After vintage enemies kill his family, a former mafia enforcer and his feisty daughter flee to Milan, where they conceal out at the same time as plotting their revenge. While it by no means manages to in reality excel, enthusiasts of this department of cinema need to be capable of locating sufficiently to realize to make it really well worth the 90-minute ride. https://youtu.be/mKRYPFKQdZg The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special Star-Lord, Drax, Rocket, Mantis, and Groot interact in a few lively shenanigans in an all-new unique created for Disney+. Full of caprice and heartfelt vacation cheer, The Guardians of the Galaxy Holiday Special offers a festive deal with complete adventure — or even discover a deeper connection among characters in an effort to come up with all of the feels. Happy vacations indeed! https://youtu.be/HMx7a6YyTjI Holy Spider A striking movie in any case, particularly with what goes on in Iran proper now... It's nicely built and permits us to look at the extra society through this Iranian woman. In HOLY SPIDER, we comply with our own circle of relatives guy Saeed as he embarks on his personal spiritual quest to "cleanse" the holy Iranian metropolis of Mashhad of immoral and corrupt avenue prostitutes. After murdering numerous women, he grows ever greater determined approximately the shortage of public hobby in his divine mission. https://youtu.be/27wZZ6O1IBc Bhediya Set withinside the forests of Arunachal, Bhediya is a tale of Bhaskar, a person who receives bitten by a wolf and starts to convert into a creature. As Bhaskar and his friends attempt to discover answers, a group of twists turns, and laughs ensue. With this, his third film, Kaushik has set up a way of life of turning in strong social messages through a mass amusement package. His debut, horror-comedy “Stree” (2018), changed into a feminist fable, while “Bala” (2019) handled alopecia and pores and skin sedation shaming. In “Bhediya,” the number one message is to shop the surroundings, and the alternative Indian exercise this is denounced is the dependency of describing human beings from the Northeast pejoratively as Chinese — casual racism is every day withinside the relaxation of the country. https://youtu.be/mfl--nI-Bhs Mukhosh Mukhosh does come alive a touch withinside the 2nd hour. However through then sixty-plus endless minutes were spent on what should've been wrapped in twenty. We move again to the primary scene, and in addition again whilst Kingshuk, all younger and wide-eyed, meets the professor of psychology, David his hero cum nemesis—gushing with adulation. 'You're higher than X,' he tells him; David blushes, 'You're embarrassing me. Years later, Kingshuk can be chasing him down the use of his very own thoughts of psychology. The scene has an experience of play that is lacking from the relaxation of the film. And it is greater than what it should've been. https://youtu.be/k2auzjsaVNc Read the full article

[newsyatra]

Happy Holi 2018 Msg Poetry Shayri Doha To Forward On Wishes Whatsapp Facebook Am | हैप्पी होली 2018: इन दोहों और कविताओं के साथ करें विश

Happy Holi 2018 Msg Poetry Shayri Doha To Forward On Wishes Whatsapp Facebook Am | हैप्पी होली 2018: इन दोहों और कविताओं के साथ करें विश

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होली आने वाली है. 2018 में होली 2 मार्च को मनाई जाएगी. हिंदी कैलेंडर के आखिरी महीने यानी फागुन के आखिर दिन पड़ने वाले इस त्योहार पर काफी कुछ लिखा गया है. अगर आप होली पर कुछ अच्छे, छेड़-छाड़ भरे, कुछ रोमांटिक एसएमसएस, व्हॉट्सऐप या फेसबुक पर भेज सकते हैं.

मौसम-ए-होली है दिन आए हैं रंग…

[scotianostra]

Happy St Patrick’s Day.

St Patrick is the patron saint of Ireland, and always will be, however a long standing theory is that he was born in what is now Scotland. It makes sense, several of our saints, most notably Columba, are said to have been from Ireland, so why not?  A 2018 delves into the matter in depth, but the theory is by no means new.

It is said his father, whose name was Calpurnius, was in a respectable station in life, being municipal magistrate in the town in which he lived. What town this was, however, is not certainly known, whether Kilpatrick, a small village on the Clyde, five miles east of Dumbarton, Duntochar, another small village about a mile north of Kilpatrick, or Dumbarton itself. But these are only the areas quoted in what is now Scotland I wont go into the ones saying England.

His father is supposed, (for nearly all that is recorded of the holy man is conjectural, or at best but inferential,) to have come to Scotland in a civil capacity with the Roman troops, under Theodosius. His mother, whose name was Cenevessa, was sister or niece of St Martin, bishop of Tours; and from this circumstance, it is presumed that his family were Christians.

He was captured as a teenager by Niall of the Nine Hostages who was to become a King of all Ireland.

He was sold into slavery in Ireland and put to work as a shepherd. He worked in terrible conditions for six years drawing comfort in the Christian faith that so many of his people had abandoned under Roman rule.

Patrick had a dream that encouraged him to flee his captivity and to head South where a ship was to be waiting for him. He travelled over 200 miles from his Northern captivity to Wexford town where, sure enough, a ship was waiting to enable his escape.

Patrick’s devotion to Ireland started with a dream which he wrote about as…..

“I saw a man coming, as it were from Ireland. His name was Victoricus, and he carried many letters, and he gave me one of them. I read the heading: ‘The Voice of the Irish.’ As I began the letter, I imagined in that moment that I heard the voice of those very people who were near the wood of Foclut, which is beside the western sea-and they cried out, as with one voice: 'We appeal to you, holy servant boy, to come and walk among us.’”

The vision prompted his studies for the priesthood. He was ordained by St. Germanus, the Bishop of Auxerre, whom he had studied under for years, and was later ordained a bishop and sent to take the Gospel to Ireland.

Patrick arrived in Slane, Ireland on March 25, 433. There are several legends about what happened next, with the most prominent claiming he met the chieftan of one of the druid tribes, who tried to kill him. After an intervention from God, Patrick was able to convert the chieftain and preach the Gospel throughout Ireland. There, he converted many people -eventually thousands - and he began building churches across the country.

He often used shamrocks to explain the Holy Trinity and entire kingdoms were eventually converted to Christianity after hearing Patrick’s message.

Patrick preached and converted all of Ireland for 40 years. He worked many miracles and wrote of his love for God in Confessions. After years of living in poverty, travelling and enduring much suffering he died March 17, 461.

He died at Saul, where he had built the first Irish church. He is believed to be buried in Down Cathedral, Downpatrick. His grave was marked in 1990 with a granite stone.

Saint Patrick’s Day is observed on 17 March, the supposed date of his death. It is celebrated inside and outside Ireland as a religious and cultural holiday. In the dioceses of Ireland, it is both a solemnity and a holy day of obligation; it is also a celebration of Ireland itself, although recent events have meant it will be more subdued than normal. I once read many years ago that there is more alcohol in the world sold on St Patrick’s Day than any other day of the year, and I quite believe that, but again am not getting into an argument.

Find out more about the paper from the link below https://www.irishcentral.com/roots/history/saint-patrick-born-scotland

The second pic is St Patrick's Rock or St Patrick's Stone located in the River Clyde close to the Erskine Bridge. It is reputedly the location from which the 16 year old Saint Patrick was kidnapped by Irish pirates whilst he was fishing.

[horsesandhockeyplayers]

Erik Johnson's Race Horses

I have painstakingly compiled a list of horses EJ has owned. Racehorses are often owned in partnership so I had to go through the list of partnerships with ERJ Racing (spoiler alert there were a lot). I did this once in 2019 and he only had 70 or so.. Our boy has been a busy busy man. Also, this has taken me over 8 hours to compile and I have regrets man.... so many regrets. Y'all better reblog this because holy fuck did I not anticipate this time suck.

All horses can be looked up on Equibase.com with their name or googled for photos. Erik doesn't currently own *all* of these horses. If they are not sold at auction and are no longer racing Equibase doesn't have current information. But he has owned all these horses at one point and currently owns some.

The list is currently over 120 horses and is under the cut. I've probably missed some.

Key:

Colt: Intact horse under the age of 5

Ridgling: Cryptorchid horse where one or both testicles are retained inside the body

Horse: Intact male horse over the age of 4

Filly: female horse under 5

Mare: female horse over 4

Abbey Vale-- 2010 Gelding

Absolute Weapon -- 2017 Ridgling (cryptorchid)

Achiever-- 2015 Horse

Ack -- 2016 Horse

Almithmaar -- 2015 Gelding

Ardenlee Star -- 2017 Gelding

Barbwire-- 2018 Colt

Benefactor -- 2014 Gelding

Big Handsome -- 2014 Horse

BizNasty -- 2016 Gelding

Borque -- 2014 Gelding (owned with Eddie Olczyk)

Bowies Hero -- 2014 Horse (Won the 2019 Eddie Read)

Brilliant Cut --2018 Filly

Broome -- 2015 Mare

Bucky’s Pick -- 2014 Gelding

Call Me Daddy-- 2017 Colt

Canadian Game -- 2015 Gelding

Cats Blame -- 2014 Gelding

Charter Oak -- 2019 Colt

Claw -- 2018 Gelding

Collins Avenue -- 2016 Gelding

Colormemoney-- 2015 Gelding

Comical -- 2017 Filly

Commander -- 2017 Gelding

Competing -- 2014 Gelding (Also owned with Eddie Olczyk)

Contagion -- 2016 Gelding

Convex -- 2017 Gelding

Convince -- 2015 Mare

Cougar Creek --2014 Mare

Crazy Sexy Munny -- 2016 Mare

Crosscheck Carlos -- 2014 Horse

Curlin Road -- 2013 Gelding

Dancin in Paradise --2016 Mare

Danny O -- 2015 Gelding

Deep Breath -- 2015 Mare

Demon -- 2018 Colt

Devil’s Beauty -- 2012 Mare

Dis Smart Cat -- 2013 Mare

Doghouse -- 2018 Gelding (Out of Erik’s Mare Don’t Tell Jackie)

Don't Tell Jackie -- 2013 Mare (Named for Erik's Longtime girlfriend and suspected wife Jackie Johnson)

Dr. Troutman -- 2014 Gelding

Falcone -- 2015 Gelding

Flip the Coin Jan -- 2015 Horse

Fluent in Sarcasm -- 2017 Gelding

Fortheluvofbourbon -- 2017 Gelding

Free Cover -- 2016 Mare

Harlan Estate -- 2018 Colt

Home Run Kitten -- 2011 Gelding

Honorable -- 2018 Colt

Impossible Task-- 2017 Gelding

Italiano --2015 Horse

I Want One -- 2017 Filly

Joejoe’s Kingdom -- 2015 Gelding

Ladymidtown -- 2016 Mare

Landeskog -- 2016 Gelding

La Vitesse -- 2014 Mare

Lazy Daisy -- 2017 Filly

Line Drive -- 2015 Mare

Lozlovian -- 2018 Gelding

Mack Daddy Too -- 2018 Colt

MacKinnon -- 2019 Colt

MacWinnon -- 2016 Gelding

Mad Mango --2012 Mare

Magically Honored-- 2017 Filly

Magnificent Mags -- 2018 Filly

Midnight Swinger -- 2013 Mare

Mr Game Seven -- 2013 Gelding

Munny Spunt -- 2014 Mare

Nice Ice -- 2015 Mare

Nitro Time -- 2018 Colt

No Thanks Erik -- 2016 Mare

Olin’s Honor -- 2016 Mare

On a Toot -- 2014 Mare

Pardsy -- 2017 Gelding

Passed by Paul -- 2014 Gelding

Patrol -- 2017 Colt

Pats Property -- 2018 Colt

Pivottina -- 2016 Mare

Playa Chica -- 2015 Mare

Pocket Personality -- 2014 Gelding

Point Streak -- 2014 Mare

Policy -- 2016 Gelding

Popular Kid -- 2014 Gelding

Preacher Roe-- 2011 Gelding

Princess Dorian -- 2014 Mare

Rantenen -- 2018 Colt

Rager-- 2017 Gelding

Rather Nosy -- 2016 Mare

Sally Dangles -- 2016 Mare

Salsa Bella -- 2015 Mare

Sarsaparilla --2018 Filly

Scoring -- 2017 Gelding

Secret Message -- 2015 Mare

Sex Symbol -- 2017 Filly

Shane’s Girlfriend --2014 Mare

Shehastheritestuff --2013 mare

Sheplaysthefield -- 2014 mare

Shooters Shoot -- 2017 Gelding

Slewgoodtobetrue -- 2016 Mare

Sober -- 2018 Filly

Sorryaboutnothing -- 2013 Gelding

Speeding -- 2018 Filly

Splashy Kisses -- 2016 Mare

Stripping -- 2017 Filly

Sun and Shadow --2015 Gelding

Surfside Sunset -- 2014 Gelding

Tap it All -- 2014 Mare

Tell Me I’m Pretty -- 2017 Filly

Text Dont Call -- 2017 Filly

The Creep-- 2016 Gelding

The Great One --2018 Colt

That Kenney Kid -- 2018 Filly

Tig Tog --2015 Mare

Tonahutu- 2014 Mare

Toothless Wonder -- 2016 Gelding

Towards the Light -- 2014 Gelding

Truck Salesman -- 2016 Gelding

Twisted Road -- 2014 Horse

United Patriot --2015 Ridgling (Cryptorchid Male)

Very Scary -- 2019 Filly

Wacky Jackie-- 2015 Mare (Named for Jackie Johnson)

Wakes Up Happy --2017 Filly

War Beast-- 2017 Gelding

War Bomber -- 2018 Gelding

Weapon --2018 Gelding

Weekly Call -- 2016 Horse

Whacked -- 2015 Mare

Where’s the D -- 2013 Mare

Wife Approved --2013 Mare

With Herself --2015 Mare

[katzkinder]

Day 8: Melancholy/THANK YOU!

I ended up joining Servamp fandom here on tumblr about... Four years ago now? In 2018, right after moving to a different state and leaving everything I knew behind. I found the anime by complete chance while browsing the Josei tag, and now... Here I am!!

I don’t know where I would be right now without this fandom, I really, truly, don’t. I’ve met so many wonderful, kind, amazing people through this series, rediscovered my love of creation, and made tons of friends!

To everyone who’s been with me on this journey... THANK YOU!

First up, @hello-vampire-kitty thank you for your hard work translating the chapters! I really appreciate the translation notes you add, and how clearly important it is to you to treat this series with the love the English localization won’t /hj

@xchibikai thank you for providing the RAWs! You’ve been doing it for so long, and without you and Kitty, we’d all be totally lost! Not to mention your Tsukimitsu sib art always makes me feel so warm and fuzzy; it’s so cute!

@servamp-announcements Even though you just started, I’m already so grateful! The formatting on posts is really easy to read, and the blog theme is also very easy to navigate! I especially appreciate that you provide sources and links back to the original announcements 🥰

@ryotakun-translations it looks like I can’t tag you, but I still wanted to give my thanks! Commissioning translations from you is always so easy and pleasant, and I know I’m getting quality work when I do.

@kalu-chan Thank you for uploading the interactions from Final Servamp Quest, and the translation for both the White Day routes and Gear of Night Trick! Your doc was super easy to navigate, and it must have taken a long time.

@rubyleaf We haven’t really ever talked before, but I still wanted to take a moment to say thanks!! Your fanfic Guilty Pleasure Friends is AMAZING, and I really admire the dedication it takes to keep updating something like that for so long. I love reading it during long car rides, and the cafe scene to this day brings me so much joy

@crazyanime3 I’ve been taking excellent care of the boys you sent me... Was it already two years ago?? Thank you for helping me start my collection way back when! I still have the little message and doodle you sent along with the buttons, saved somewhere safe

@snowlilys-wife @cottoncanada @shinychxndelure Thank you for being so supportive and accepting! I love talking with you all and hashing out scenarios and headcanons is always really fun! Also, y’all are funny af

@mahi-does-some-art @pomfry @hisakata-resutomoshibi @yarrayora @haru-jje @unwelcomedfox  @revoleotion @xthunderbolt @madburnishes @tipzycat y’all some talented and also incredibly sweet motherfuckers, holy shit. I’m so, so glad I met all of you.

@joydoesathing your genderbend designs are always so creative and I love so, so many of them! I think my favorites are Gil and Hugh. I also love your Virtues au a lot, too! Your eye for character design is incredible, and then you do all that in pen on top of it? Amazing!!

@chayam-chi Your art is so cute! You’re such a sweet person, and so funny, too! I always look forward to seeing you on my dash, and I look forward to seeing where you go from here!!

@danozi1 Your sense of humor and the creepy cuteness of your works always scratch a very specific itch for me, and also you have Good Taste

@mystivio @meiwaku-san Your panel colorings are so good and always leave me floored. Like, coloring goals, full on.

@random-husky I’ve super duper enjoyed everything you’ve posted this week, from your ideas to your compositions, you’re so creative!!

@kiwitheweebartist you’re getting better and better every day! Your little commentary posts and random thoughts are all very cute and it makes me smile whenever I read one.

@kchk-55 @d01110010rr You’re so young, but already so talented?? I’m amazed! I hope good things find you both going forward, and that school and life in general is easy on you. If anyone is mean to y’all, I’ll beat them up!!

@jutsuzuban MIKEY. YOU. I love you!!

@niccodoesart Sushi! I love the way you color; you’re so good with markers! The way you draw feet is so cute ❤

@faith-gigliorosa Your edits are so cool, holy shit. I always look forward to them! Ballad of the mona lisa is still one of my favorites.

@blackrose4242564 @theartcat2 @maria-the-mage @wingedpaperpeachpurse @radioactivesweet @fgfhfhfhf @ourelenabespalovafan @ezuja-deatro @ninjagirl142 @pause143 I see you guys in my notes for practically everything I post and thank you so much for your support!!!

@bluemoonfantasiesiii there’s a lot of things I could say to you and about you. There’s a lot of things I want to express. There’s a lot of moments and talks that I hold dear to my heart, but I think the best way to sum up my feelings towards you, is this... ......... >:3c

... That was a lot of people, huh. |D Sorry if I annoyed anyone with this, but I just... Wanted to express my sincere gratitude to each and every one of you. I’m a better, happier person for each person I’ve met here, and I’ve never quite had this kind of experience within a fandom before. I’m glad Servamp was the first time I held my hand out within an online community to quite this degree, and thank you to every single person who reached back.

A very merry, very belated, HAPPY 10TH ANNIVERSARY to you all!

[honeybunhalo]

That supercorp au sounds absolutely amazing, I need know just much I needed it *wheeze*

I’m all here for it. Two gay moms raising their punk kid, so lovely

Oh my god HOLY SHIT! It's you!

Thank you so much for messaging me! I literally love your art so much I reblog your stuff all the time on my other side blogs! I’m so happy this grabbed your attention! I really really appreciate you showing interest in the Supercorp + Kon AU. I have so many little things planned for this and a timeline I’m still sorting out but I would also love to share it. If you wanna exchange ideas I’d be down too. I’m thinking of posting a bunch of unfinished sketches of the au. I have a short intro comic planned for it and wrote most of the ending story for it.

Short version of how the AU is structured so far:

Half this story takes place when Kara and Clark find Kon and a lot of Kon adjusting to life with Kara and Lena. Kon is rescued early from Cadmus so he looks around 8 to 9ish years old. (I wanna give him lots of time to be a kid relative to his canon story).

The second half is Kon a few later when he’s in early high school and recounting life to this point. You get to see how a kid who grew up with Kara and Lena as their parents would see how much they complement and love each other. Then other more nefarious things happen.

There’s an intermediate story between those two above with Kon and Jon. Kon still knows the boy who is technically his half brother and they spend some weekends together. Even if ties with Clark are strained that doesn’t mean the rest of the Superfamily has to suffer with that. — I left out a lot but that’s the general gist.

(I wrote this before the Lois and Clark show that I refuse to acknowledge because I’m so angry about the family set up as if Clark doesn’t have other kids that could have been Jon’s older brothers like Kon or Chris. It genuinely saddened me so much. I guess that’s why we make fan content right?)

It’s a pretty expansive AU at this point because I need it for my soul. There are a lot of things that could be one-shots but I still wanted to make this universe lived-in (does that make sense?) I like to take a lot of time with emotional pacing because that’s what I like to read. Very indulgent introspective works. — also the core four exist as cameos later on. (I wrote this without watching the flash show since season 3 so idk what’s going on there. It’s gonna be more comic based versions of characters that aren’t important CW!Supergirl cast members)

I also have text document notes of me rambling on about the character themes between these three because I have lost control over my life. I’ll stop there because I will go on forever if I don’t.

I can give you a little sample of one of the things I’m working on. Specifically drawings I’ve made in the past two years but never posted.

That last image was literally part of a slideshow I made in 2018.

Childhood trauma on main with a healthy half course of Sapphic suffering spawned this into being. My asexual ass over here making domestic family au. This is my comfort AU

I'm definitely going to post more now that at least a handful of people seem interested

[theyarebothgunshot]

ROSE I SWEAR TO GOD WHAT THE HELL ITS HAPPENING????? AT THIS POINT I JUST THINK THEY JUST FORGOT TO COME OUT????? THEY ARE ACTING LIKE THAT AND BEING “WAIT WHY ARE PEOPLE FREAKING OUT SO MUCH”???? OH MY LITERAL GOD HOLY CRAAAAAAAAAAP

y'all weren't kidding when you said you could feel something big was coming huh. sigh. hi! welcome to: the gang freaks out about misha's text in my inbox

instantly my first thought upon seeing misha’s text: “he sounds like that in the morning.”

they woke up together on the regular <3

GUNSHOTS WAKE UP DID YOU SEE MISHA’S TEXT??? he misses jensen so much :(((

yes :(( and me too :((

*adjusts tinhat* d-do you think misha originally took that photo to send to jensen? like a “hurry up and come in here, the pink blankey and i miss you.” ...

oh my god anon its too early for this i dont need to get emotional!!! on god i believe he texts him pics like this every day

have you seen misha's text yet??

no

girl wake up new cockles content

july is gonna be our month i can feel it!!!!!!!!

hi did anybody else get the fact that he never said that pic was while filming supernatural. like it was a little weird to not add 'in vancouver while filming [episode title]' My theory is that its a little joke because that pic is ACTUALLY in jensens apartment NOW when hes filming the boys from like a week ago. It seems like something he would do amen

oh my god i cant do 'cockles are living together rn' truthing today but you are very brave <3

ROSE ROSE ROSE ARE YOU AWAKE????? MISHA’S JENSEN TEXT!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK I’M SCREAMING????? HELP!!! what 👏🏽 was 👏🏽 the 👏🏽 reason 👏🏽 misha ??? he really said i miss my march 1st baby OUTLOUD without really saying it outright i- MISHA WHATS UR @ SERIOUSLY!! - 🦋 anon

misha said happy pride to my husband and our perceivers and i thank him for that <3

Rose I hope you have a very nice sleep and are not suffering throughout this major cockles event in the middle of the night. ANYWAYS I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY I CAN'T BREATHE 'SPARE ROOM' 'HIS BLANKY' SIR - anon anon

*looks into the camera* so anyways i woke up pretty much around the time you messaged me this and i am dead tired now

hehehe once again you've made the mistake of going to bed. I think imma stay up to see your reaction to the sleepover in a few hours ;) -🐢

hope i didnt dissapoint dsjhfsjfhsjhf

I’m just here to apologize that once again you were asleep when the fandom decided to start on fire <3

thank you darling i feel like i deserve some financiel compensation tbh

To all of the other anons who will undoubtedly be in gunshot's traditional freak out post with me (looking forward to all of y'alls reactions 😂), I really hope you've enjoyed this fantastic ending to pride month. Misha really chose to share that info wth us!! I haven't slept much this week because each night gets crazier. We're all thriving in this dumpster right now - 🐢

god bless we ARE all thriving!!!!

i cant deal with the Love You script dropping on the same day that misha posts both a t&s pride post and That Text. so misha is invested enough to know that the script dropped today in all likelihood. and. i. help. help. help.

🍭

yeah yeah yeah exactly nonnie exactly

my tumblr has been crazy, i haven't been able to send you asks until now 🥺 my posts are not showing in the tags...anyway tumblr staff already fix the problem with the asks so at least I can be loud in here.

crazy everything is just crazy! Misha's post, Misha's message, Goodbye Stranger script...all I'm missing is for Jensen to pull a heller!Jensen on main and i'm dead

Hope you have a beautiful day!!

-🐣

yeah tumblr fucked up and turned on my asks yesterday wtf, i hope your problem gets fixed soon!

and i hope you have the best day too!!!

we get to see misha today too i can't do this

oh god me neither

THEY WERE DOING LAUNDRY TOGETHER AFTER ALL

JDFHJSHFHSJ YEAH FUCKING HELLLL

this is just me speculating but is it a coincidence Misha is thinking about “lasts” especially the last night sleeping at Jensen’s, on the last day of pride????? *insert incredibles coincidence I think not gif*

its never a coincidence, everything this chaos machine does is on purpose

You woke up much earlier than expected! I legit thought that I had lost track of time scrolling through the madness that is the cockles tag right now. Sorry that you're going to be dragging for the rest of your day. Misha ensures that only he gets sleep when he pulls these stunts -🐢

lmao it was already light outside and i kept thinking about the misha text so i thought fuck it lets forget sleep, i need to cockles truth on main before i have to go to work <3

I’m sorry. I died. 🦚

me too!

*head in hands*, affectionate - tea anon

happy second month of pride everyone

cheers to that!!

had a thought: that one time the fan asked misha about them sharing clothes in 2018 and he joked, “it’s easy for our clothes to get mixed up, that’s all. whose is whose, you know, when you’re putting it on.” and “now everyone’s like ‘hmm, how’d the laundry get mixed up, guys?’” i hate him. i hate that it’s not implausible now. i hate.

how many times do i have to tell y'all that misha uses jokes to mask the truth <3 he was telling us the truth!