#HOW DO I MAKE WRITING TAGS FASTER OR EASIER AT LEAST hELP

[violainebriat]

It's a bit weird typing out a full post here on tumblr. I used to be one of these artists that mostly focused on posting only images, the least amount of opinions/thoughts I could share, the better. Today, the art world online feels weird, not only because of AI, but also the algorithms on every platform and the general way our craft is getting replaced for close to 0 dollars. This website was a huge instrument in kickstarting my career as a professional artist, it was an inspiring place were artists shared their art and where we could make friends with anyone in the world, in any industries. It was pretty much the place that paved the way as a social media website outside of Facebook, where you could search art through tags etc. Anyhow, Tumblr still has a place in my heart even if all artists moved away from it after the infamous nsfw ban (mostly to Instagram and twitter). And now we're all playing a game of whack-a-mole trying to figure out if the social media platform we're using is going to sell their user content to AI / deep learning (looking at you reddit, going into stocks). On the Tumblr side, Matt Mullenweg's interviews and thoughts on the platform shows he's down to use AI, and I guess it could help create posts faster but then again, you have to click through multiple menus to protect your art (and writing) from being scraped. It's really kind of sad to have to be on the defensive with posting art/writing online. It doesn't even reflect my personal philosophy on sharing content. I've always been a bit of a "punk" thinking if people want to bootleg my work, it's like free advertisement and a testament to people liking what I created, so I've never really watermarked anything and posted fairly high-res version of my work. I don't even think my art is big enough to warrant the defensiveness of glazing/nightshading it, but the thought of it going through a program to be grinded into a data mush to be only excreted out as the ghost of its former self is honestly sort of deadening.

Finally, the most defeating trend is the quantity of nonsense and low-quality content that's being fed to the internet, made a million times easier with the use of AI. I truly feel like we're living what Neil Postman saw happening over 40 years ago in "amusing ourselves to death"(the brightness of this man's mind is still unrivaled in my eyes).

I guess this is my big rant to tell y'all now I'm gonna be posting crunchy art because Nightshade and Glaze basically make your crispy art look like a low-res JPEG, and I feel like an idiot for doing it but I'm considering it an act of low effort resistance against data scraping. If I can help "poison" data scrapping by wasting 5 minutes of my life to spit out a crunchy jpeg before posting, listen, it's not such a bad price to pay. Anyhow check out my new sticker coming to my secret shop really soon, and how he looks before and after getting glazed haha....

[picturesdarkpurple-69]

AUSTRIA*GIVES THE WHOLE CANDY SHOP*

Thank you @j-ellyfish (let me know if you don't want to be tagged) for the help in understanding his character more! I haven't had many opportunities to write for him, so it took me a bit to get my thoughts together and hopefully y'all approve.

Candy bowl time below 🍬:

• candy corn – be overstimulated or edged?

- Edged, most of his partners seem to get a kick out of almost bringing him to orgasm and while he may complain, he can't deny how good it feels when he's allowed to finally blow his load.

• tootsie roll – in secret, be groped or grope others?

- Be groped, he's used to people getting handsy with him and isn't phased anymore when someone's palm slips a little low to grab his ass.

• peanut butter cups – watch porn or read erotica?

- Read erotica, he finds that some of it is actually quite tastefully written and it's more stimulating than the shody acting in most porn.

• redhots – ice play or wax play?

- Wax play, of the few times he's tried it (usually at the pleading behest of Miss Hungary), it's always been a pleasant experience, especially when it's dripped down his lower stomach or hip dips.

• twix – be watched or watch others get off?

- Be watched getting off, he's willing to push past his insecurities to give his partners quite a show so long as they give him the proper encouragement.

• snickers – join a gangbang or orgy?

- Orgy, there's less pressure to perform like in a gangbang and with an orgy he can just relax in a chair and get his dick sucked with little effort.

• bubblegum – tits or ass?

- Tits, he's not one to say it out loud, but he adores getting the opportunity to feel up a lovely pair of soft breasts.

• jolly rancher – receive or give oral?

- Receive oral, it's one of the few acts he'll actively request of his partners and he's kinda known for being a little selfish in the oral department.

• skittles – watch themself in the mirror or listen to a recording of their voice?

- Listen to a recording of their own voice, insecure in his looks, he'd rather listen to his voice then see what he looks like when orgasming (even though his partners tell him they love it).

• licorice – roleplay sexy nurse, sexy teacher, or sexy maid?

- Sexy maid, he likes the fantasy of someone willing to service him at any moment (and he gets the benefit of someone cleaning his house).

• kitkat – wear shibari or a chastity belt/cock cage?

- Chastity belt/cock cage, being forced to wear one, having to keep himself composed all day, it gets his heart racing just thinking about how much he'll need to beg to be let out.

• m&m’s – gasp and groan or scream and moan?

- Gasp and groan, he can be a bit self-conscious about how he sounds, so he makes an effort to keep himself quiet most of the time.

• lollipop – missionary or doggy style?

- Missionary, it's physically easier to do for his lazy ass and he likes the closeness it brings between him and his partners.

• dots – film a sex tape from a distance or take up close nudes?

- Film a sex tape, he'd rather not do either, but at least with the tape it would show less angles and his face would be harder to see.

• almond joy – cum in or on them?

- Cum on, less annoying to clean.

• laffy taffy – do they masturbate on their own or use a guide?

- Use a guide, when masturbating, he likes to have a little help getting there, just turn his brain off and do as instructed.

• whoppers – change their first time or keep it the same?

- Keep it the same, it wasn't bad, he had a good time, and it doesn't feel like something worth it to change.

• gummy bears – have a partner with premature ejaculation or erectile disfunction?

- Premature ejaculation, even though it's not his fault, he'd struggle to not take it personally if he couldn't physically arouse his partner.

• milk duds – dildo or vibrator?

- Vibrator, less clean up, faster to cum with, and can sometimes make enough noise to hide his own voice.

• smarties – overpower their partner or be overpowered?

- Be overpowered, he's more of a submissive in bed and will let others take the lead.

• nerds – be with an experienced partner or virgin?

- Experienced partner, he would rather have someone who already knows what they're doing over needing to teach someone the basics.

• swedish fish – put on lingerie/bondage wear or be completely nude?

- Lingerie, it's more aesthetically pleasing, especially on the right partner (he means Miss Hungary).

[tangledinink]

*A quick question from an awed procrastinator*

How do you make so many AUs and stories?

(even if something is my hyperfixation and I love doing it, I still go at a snails pace, and I was wondering if you have any "weird tricks" or things that help you finish faster?)

Also also, your AUs are some of my favorites, the angst, the comfort, and the art is just *chef's kiss*

Oh gosh, I mean, part of the answer is procrastination? I'm very lucky that both the job I'm currently at (so far, at least, fingers crossed) and the job I had previously allows me to kind of do my own thing during downtime, so long as I stay on top of all my work responsibilities. Getting to write/draw is like the little reward I get when my work is done u w u And so sometimes a part of my day also involves... avoiding doing work things for a little while by writing or drawing instead. Not Doing Boring Work Tasks is a great motivator for creative projects, lol.

I also just have tend to draw pretty fast, lmao, and I am also hugely motivated by attention u w u I am again very lucky in the sense that a lot of you lovely folks on tumblr decided you liked the stuff I made pretty early on in my TMNT stint, and I am blessed with tags and comments and replies engaging in my work, which is HUGELY motivating. I wanna work on my projects because I wanna get to post them and see what people think!!! I wanna hear what people have to say about the next step in the story!!!

I guess the best advice I have is to not be afraid of shortcuts, especially at the beginning. Let some stuff happen off-screen. Exposition dump every now and again. Copy and paste is your friend. Etc etc etc. Let go of the idea of 'this needs to be perfect' and embrace 'it just needs to be done.' Not every scene or paragraph or panel or even comic I make is going to be a showstopper. But phoning some stuff in makes it easier for me to REALLY lay into that one big dramatic part of the story where I really want it to count. And if I spend forever fussing over the set-up at the beginning, I'm never gonna get to the dramatic scene, anyway! So just do it. Worry about quality control later. Just make it first. Sometimes you don't feel like writing or drawing or doing whatever. Do it anyway.

(Having fandom friends who can hype you up and you can send things to as you're making it is very helpful, too!)

[yasmindifference]

any tips for getting your fics noticed? i hardly get any engagement ;_;

I'm not an expert, but here are a few things that might help!

Tags Prioritize your tags!

It can be tempting to tag as many things as possible in the hopes of grabbing people's attention, but you also risk turning them away with a block of tags. Keep in mind that while readers might be overjoyed to read a 300k fic, that's because they're emotionally invested in it! They're not emotionally invested in your tags, and they're only gonna stick with them to a certain point.

To wit: if you have 15 tags about what you should've been doing instead of writing your fic and 4 tags about the content of the fic, chances are, the casual browser isn't gonna see the fic-related tags. They'll have moved on by the third tag about your neglected homework.

So I recommend really thinking about and focusing the content of your fic: which characters are really important? which relationships feature? which tropes/themes play the biggest parts? Figure out what really deserves highlighting, and tag that!

That said, some people enjoy going wild in the tags, and in the end, fic is about fun. You don't have to minimize your tags if you don't want to! Just be aware of how those extraneous tags pile up.

Summary I can't overstate how important the summary is. Number one tip: Do not include any kind of mention that you're bad at summarizing, the story is better than the summary, etc. I understand the temptation (summaries are hard!) but nothing turns me off a fic faster than the author denigrating themselves in the summary. The summary is your chance to advertise! If you're using it to criticize yourself, what am I supposed to assume about your story?

Other than that, just try to make it interesting! Again, it's your chance to advertise: what's happening in your fic that's fun? What are the characters going through? Toss a fun quote from the fic in there, explain the point of the fic, boil it down to the main trope, etc. There's no "one right way" to summarize, but here's a tip: if your summary bores you, it'll probably bore your readers, too.

Readability Anon, this is SO important. Is your fic easy to read? I don't mean in terms of content or even grammar, I mean layout. There have been many, many fics with fascinating summaries where I couldn't even make it through the first chapter because they were just physically hard to read.

Break up your paragraphs! You need to give your readers' eyes a break every now and then. A "big block of text," as it's called, is usually a pretty quick turn off. There's no hard and fast rule, but I typically try to keep my paragraphs under five lines. (Note that's not sentences - five lines.)

Think of it this way: people are going to be interrupted while they're reading. Maybe the doorbell rings, maybe they get a text, maybe they're reading under the desk while they're in class. If you've got twenty things happening in every paragraph, chances are they'll be losing their place repeatedly. Give your readers a fighting chance!

And for the love of potatoes: ALWAYS start a new line when the person speaking changes. Just look:

"Did you finish the reading?" she asked. "No," he said, "I got abducted by aliens last night." She raised her eyebrows. "Aliens, huh?" "Aliens!" "Was it fun at least?" He sighed. "No, they were just looking for directions to the post office. The one on Jefferson, not the one on Seventh." "Why does everyone want to go to the post office?" she wondered. "Who even sends letters anymore?" He shrugged.

That's hard to follow! There's a lot of lines there and a lot of quotes and not a lot of descriptive tags...and the ones that are make it harder to keep track of who's talking, not easier! Compare that to this:

"Did you finish the reading?" she asked. "No," he said, "I got abducted by aliens last night." She raised her eyebrows. "Aliens, huh?" "Aliens!" "Was it fun at least?" He sighed. "No, they were just looking for directions to the post office. The one on Jefferson, not the one on Seventh." "Why does everyone want to go to the post office?" she wondered. "Who even sends letters anymore?" He shrugged.

It's still a boring conversation, but at least it's one you can read! This is especially important when you have multiple characters using the same pronouns. Keep who's talking clearer by giving each speaker an individual line!

The readability goes for summaries, too - if your summary is a twenty line long block of text, chances are people are going to scroll past it.

Expectations Finally, and potentially most importantly: manage your expectations. A fic for a popular pairing is usually going to get more engagement than a fic for a rarepair. A fic in a lively fandom is likely to get more engagement than a fic in a fandom that's mostly died out.

Does your fic contain a controversial kink? Have you warned for a common trigger? Is the fic centered on a minor character most casual fans couldn't pick out of a lineup?

It's wonderful to write for characters/pairings/kinks/whatever that aren't popular. I'd never want to discourage you from that! But it's important to keep in mind that a less popular subject is, by nature, going to get less engagement.

And also: consider the dates! It's tempting to compare engagement on your fic with engagement on the most popular fics in the fandom/pairing/whatever. But was that fic with ten thousand kudos posted earlier this year? Probably not! Chances were, it's taken a long time for that fic to gather that much engagement. Don't compare your numbers three days after posting with a fic that's been up three years.

I hope any of this is helpful, anon! Good luck! ♡♡♡♡

[idontknowbutitsbjutifl]

#im just tired#im trying to figure it out on my own#any tips how get my shit together?#pls no 'go to therapy'#i aint ready for this for now

Sry for reblog but reacting to your tags would be too long for a comment : D Putting it on sideblog! Lemme know if you want me to delete it though <3 - Teryster

List of things that helped me/saved my ass before going to therapy:

I accepted as fact that I cannot DO anything until I'm safe, financially secure, well fed, slept 8 hours, feel clean, talked to a friend and worked out/stretched. Those are basic needs, not a treat or lucky accident. I forgive myself for not being functional if I didn't fulfill my needs first.

Tying to that, I got rid of abusive/toxic environment. It was very hard and I wasn't half aware of what was happening, but once I did it, it was like dropping dead weight and seeing clear for the first time. I was afraid I'm not gonna make it on my own - but once I was free of the abuse, I had suddenly more energy, clearer mind and I wasn't so afraid. I was capable to handle being alone and taking care of myself because I gained Safety.

I started thinking of myself as a machine that needs to cool off, get cleaned, repaired, upgraded or refuelled.

I learned to see all parts of me (body, brain, whatever) as my own team I'm fond of and not an enemy that backstabs me. I kid you not that shit did WONDERS - once I viewed my body as my friend, it started working FOR ME. Damn bruh

I stopped lying to people ("I can't go to work I broke my leg" while I was just crying in bed, or telling people I'm ok when I'm not, or cancelling a meetup telling people I got too much work while in reality I was too depressed to talk to anyone) and became honest - it was then way easier to be honest with myself too.

If I have Bad Days, I go through a list of things that could have caused it (because I can't tell like other people can I guess lol) and if I find nothing, I proclaim that day a Take It Easy Day. I don't expect anything from myself and anything I do is a Victory. It will pass, and it will pass faster if I just let it happen and wash away. If I fight it it gets worse, for me at least!

I don't keep my thoughts for myself - I either share them with friends that I have established healthy boundaries with, or I write it, or vent it through smth. But I do Process those thoughts and emotions (or more like I'm still learning : D). Keeping it in, even if it's the dumbest cringe thought, makes my brain so much worse. It's like wiping your brain free of rot.

I recognized that I'm never gonna be "normal" and it's always going to be struggle, but I had days now where I woke up and felt good and felt HAPPY. Comparing it to my worst days, it's definitely worth to fight for.

I stopped calling my to do list as list of things I need to do, but now I call it "getting rid of stressors" fkjfkjf Somehow it really motivates me to get shit done!

When I encounter a Fear (checking an email, calling a doctor, etc) I push myself to RUN INTO IT HEAD ON RIGHT THERE RIGHT NOW. Sometimes it's hysterical - I was once opening my postal box while softly yelling, but I did it!! It's still hard for me this one but it helped SO MUCH with those endless weeks/months of fearing something and then finally doing it and wow guess what, it wasn't bad at all : D

I take time to celebrate victories, but spend little time mourning failures. Still not so good at this but the system helped so much with depression!!

I identified the toxic cycles I can get into sometimes and I can now tell when they're coming (most of the time OTL) and avoid them! Like, for example, self-fullfilling prophecy where I subconciously want to fail on purpose to Be Right about myself being a failure. Like no, bitch, we work for success lets go!!

I found a really fun, fulfilling job that has a Meaning to me

I live with friends that share my interests and we help each other!

I watch funny videos of americans failing at shit and being dumb uvu instant boost

I don't appreciate my brain being a little bitch like sir can u stop making me depressed? give me a break bro 😞

[chimchiminiekookie]

Soulless Youth | Chapter 2

|2|

Summary: She wanted freedom but craved for restraints, a wilting flower sheltered in her own home who was suddenly thrust into a boarding school she considered the closest to be the outside world which was filled with politicians, beautiful young men and aristocrats. They were reckless and obnoxious, but maybe they’re just what she needed, “We may be young forever, but don’t be fooled; that doesn’t make up for the fact that we’re a dying breed, we might as well live it up.”

Pairing: bts (Jimin and Jungkook probably but with moments with other members XD) x reader

Genre: vampire!bts

Word Count: 7,747

AN: Hi guys, I think I went a little overboard when I saw how good you all were receiving the character profiles, lol. so I accidentally ended up writing 7k+ words, oops. I hope you guys like it, the second semester starting tomorrow so I might be a bit inactive, but I’ll be writing in my free time so once I log back on, I’ll have something for you guys! :) So, I decided to upload it without images, I hope you guys enjoy it though. :)

Character Profiles

| 1 | 2 |

When you finally closed your eyes to drift off to sleep, you dreamt of a girl with big eyes and blonde hair. Her eyes were brown but turned emerald green and she was smiling at you as she twirled inside a school bus.

"Hi!" She jumped in front of you.

"Hi?" You looked unsure of what to do, "I'm sorry but who are you?"

"I'm Lisa! You're new at Cross Academy so I wanted to visit you!"

"Why am I dreaming about you?" You were awestruck at the girl as she grabbed your hands in hers, "did I see you earlier or-"

"It's cause I wanted to be here silly!"

"Are you a vampire?"

"Last I checked." She giggled.

"How come I don't know you then?" You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, "I know the purebloods and the nobles."

"Nobody knows me." She tilted her head to the side while thinking then corrected herself; well they didn't know about me at first I mean." She sat down on the seat next to yours then sighed, "Anyways, it's really great to meet you. But just keep this between us okay? Or not, it's your choice!"

That's when you woke up with Namjoon standing at the foot of your bed. Apparently everyone's been trying to wake you since the afternoon because the only shop in town that makes and distributes the school uniform closes at 5 and everyone's been crowded around the store since morning.

You walked with the others in the town square where a large bell tower was positioned when Namjoon stopped everyone right in front of it.

"Alright, so for this trip, we're buying books and uniforms, strictly those items only, we don't have time for any detours." He seemed to point the words at Taehyung, Jimin, and Hoseok who already seemed to be looking at random shops.

"Hoseok. Jimin." He called them quietly but they followed right away. 

"Taehyung." Taehyung seemed determined to disobey Namjoon so he started running off while Hoseok tried to calm Namjoon down.

"You look bothered by something." Yoongi suddenly spoke from behind you.

"Oh! Yeah I guess so." You shrugged.

"Can we do anything about it?" Jungkook moved closer to you.

"Actually it's about my dreams-"

"Speaking of, I had a wonderful one last night!" Jungkook beamed, "I was all alone in a hospital's blood bank!" He swooned.

"Yes, well anyway, I've been having trouble with my dream; I can't seem to forget about it."

"Oh, well if it's a problem about dreams then you should ask Yoongi-"

"Don't say it, don't even think about it. I refuse to even associate myself with that ghastly toddler." Yoongi rolled his eyes, "and besides, if she already has the dream and wants to forget it, then we should be asking Namjoon."

"Oh, no we can't she's getting here late so she wouldn't be here to help even if she wanted to be." Jungkook shrugged.

You tried to follow the conversation but ended up lost anyway, "I'm sorry, but who are we talking about?"

"Well I was going to suggest Yoongi's sister, but Yoongi's suggesting Namjoon's friend." Jungkook wiggled his eyebrows at you giving emphasis on the word friend.  

You stared at Yoongi with wide eyes, "I never knew you had a sister."

"Yeah, well I do, and she's a pain in the ass."

"What's she like?"

"She’s a retard." He muttered and walked ahead of you towards the others who were trying to get Taehyung down from a store roof he'd climbed.

You tried to scower your brain for a sister older or younger in the Min Family's history but you couldn't. "But the history books on your family don't mention a sister. Older or younger, you're the only one recorded."

"Look Y/N, just drop it. It's not something I wish to talk about." Yoongi's cold tone gave you the idea to shut up before he got angry.

"Sorry." You spoke in a tiny voice. You started to lag behind the group bothered by how Yoongi suddenly snapped at you when you bumped into someone.

"So Yoongi snapped at you huh?" The orange haired boy was snickering.

"Yeah, it scared the shit out of me actually."

He lazily put his arm around your shoulders, "Don't worry about that. He's like that to everyone."

"I just don't see what's wrong with his sister."

Jimin suddenly pulled you two to a stop, "You asked about his sister? Well no wonder he snapped at you."

"Why, what's wrong with his sister?"

"It's nothing to do with his sister perse but what she is." Jimin nervously looked at Yoongi. "This proximity may not be the best if we're gonna be talking about the boy who can control sound waves." He whispered in your ear before pulling you away all the way to the other end of the town.

"What about the others?"

He scoffed and ran a hand through his hair, "Don't worry about them, we’ll find them. That line for uniforms isn't going to magically disappear so we have a good 20 or so minutes." He looked at you then sighed, "You're new here so why don't I tell you about the do's and don'ts with Yoongi?"

He took your silence as a yes and continued, "Don't talk about his family and I mean mother, father, and sister. This is almost taboo. Don't touch his things, and don't bother him before noon else he'll really bite you head off. Most importantly, don't stick your nose in his business; Yoongi's a pretty private guy so he'll tell you what he wants to tell you when the time comes. But since you're so confused, I'll tell you a little about him."

"How do you feel about humans?" His eyes were dark brown but they still pierced you as he looked into your eyes.

"Don't dislike them but I'm not fond either." You remembered the mobs in the 19th century in a temporary home your father had bought which led to his near death.

"Well Yoongi's one of the vampires who absolutely despises them." He licked his lips before continuing, "You see, Yoongi's mother was killed during the war between the Vampire Council and the now nonexistent Vampire Hunter's Association. She was just in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong person, and the only one who willingly avenged his mother's death and killed the hunter who killed his mother was the vampire council, specifically Namjoon's dad which explains his loyalty to Namjoon and the council."

"That doesn't explain why he hates his sister."

"Oh right. Sorry, about that. His father remarried but she was human, he turned her but not before conceiving a child-"

"His little sister." You both spoke at the same time.

"So, he hates them because they're a reminder of what happened to his mother."

"But is she really terrible?" You looked at Jimin confused face and specified, "His sister I mean."

"She's kind of ditzy. She's definitely out there. If you know what I mean. But yeah, she's nice. Well from the one time I actually talked to her.” He shrugged.

“But if her mother’s a human then…”

“Exactly, point number two of why Yoongi hates his sister, she’s a Half-blood but one born from the union of vampire and human. Point number three of why he hates her is because she’s ruined the Hio Bloodline, centuries of purebloods all down the drain just because his dad didn’t feel like using a condom one night.” Jimin laughed at his own joke.

“It’s not funny.” You stared seriously at Jimin, “Watching a pure bloodline crumble in front of your very eyes, it’s soul crushing. It feels as if everything that your ancestors have worked hard to build has crumbled and for it to be his own sister. No wonder he hates her, the Hio bloodline was the purest and one of the longest bloodlines in our history.” You looked at Jimin who stayed rigid and silent as he listened to you talk, “You wouldn’t understand you’re just-“

“I’m just what?” He stood up, “A noble? What’s wrong with that?”

“Nothing is wrong with being a noble; it’s just that purebloods take pride in their bloodline.”

He stood up suddenly and stood directly in front of you, his eyes flashing icy blue, “and what of you? If you and I were to end up together, would you rather to not conceive all for the sake of your precious bloodline?”

“No. I wouldn’t, and besides, in what world would I ever dream of you and I getting together. My father has plans for me, as does yours probably, and I can assure you that he will at whatever cost maintain our ‘precious bloodline’ as you so put it.”

He laughed humorlessly and scoffed, “You and every other pureblood out there, God you’re all so stuck up! You’re kind are endangered Y/N!” He laughed to spite you, “How many more houses are completely pureblooded? Five, six? Seven at most? Out of those seven, three are already living in our dorm and one of the remaining four is female.” He looked at you when you didn’t let out a sound, opting instead to look down at your feet instead.

“Shit.” He sighed running his hand through his hair, “Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it that way.” He sat back down next to you, “It’s just nobles are looked down on in favor of purebloods, doesn’t it just get old? It must get lonely up at the top.”

“It does.” You spoke up suddenly, “But that doesn’t matter to me. Noble or Pureblood, I don’t care. Everything I’ve ever done was in order to please my father, and if he wants to maintain our bloodline, that’s out of my hands. He gave me life, I owe him that much.” You stared up at Jimin.

“You’re dad isn’t here. None of our parents are, so you’re free to live how you want to here.” He looked out into the square, “When Jungkook is at home, he barely smiles, let alone talk. But when he’s here, he’s himself, even if just a little bit.”

“Yoongi may hate his sister, but he still keeps a picture of her tucked away in his desk drawer.” He looked back at you, “No matter how self-centered we are Y/N, there’s always even the tiniest bit of human in us.” He got up and grabbed your hand, “Now let’s go.” He pulled you up.

When you got home, it was already nightfall, upon entering the dorm, everyone went their separate ways. By this time you noticed, Yoongi had taken the extra care to ignore you. You made it up the stairs and before turning right to your room, you decided to pay Yoongi a visit. You knocked on his door, three times, four times, and then you heard feet shuffling then the door opened.

“Oh, Y/N. Hello, what brings you here? Do you have any problems?” Namjoon was dressed in his pajamas but if you looked past his tall build you would be able to see Yoongi slumped by his desk on his computer.

“I actually needed to talk with Yoongi.”

“Be my guest then.” He moved aside to let you in only to hover in the doorway when you and Yoongi stared silently at each other.

“I wanted to talk to him alone if possible.” You gave Namjoon the faintest of smiles before he hurried out the door.

“What do you want?” Yoongi stared at his computer again.

“I wanted to apologize if I struck a chord when I asked about your sister.” You breathed deeply, “I understand that you don’t like talking about it so-“

“I’m not mad about that, not even at you to be honest.” He swiveled his chair to face you, “I know who you were dreaming about.” He rolled his eyes.

“Really?”

“Yeah, I’ve been thinking about it the whole day.” He pinched the bridge of his nose, “That would be my sister, Lisa.”

“Yeah! That’s her name! How’d you know it was her?”

“She’s a Dreamweaver.” He stared at your confused expression and sighed, “She can manipulate dreams, go in and out of them at will.”

“But how come I’ve never heard of her?”

“Her mother and my dad got together at the peak of the war between vampire hunters and vampires so recording a crime worthy of treason during the time wasn’t a good idea.”

“Oh, well would you hate me if I talked to her?”

“I wouldn’t have a problem with it, go ahead. That’s none of my business anyway.” He looked at your guilt filled face and chuckled, “I don’t hate her like the others would tell you, I dislike her but I don’t hate her. Now get out before I deafen you.” You clumsily ran out the door and muttered a quick thanks to Yoongi who had already gone back to typing on his computer.

“Did you settle it?” You let out a shriek from Jimin sudden presence.

“Yeah, it was fine. His sister’s been visiting me in my sleep.” You stared at Jimin who was leaning against the wall.

“Oh, so it was Lisa. You should ask for her number next time and give it to me.” You scoffed at his sudden change of attitude and started walking downstairs.

“Don’t worry; I’ll be sure to do that.”

“Why the sudden change of attitude?” He was following you.

“I could ask you the same.” You rolled your eyes.

“This is who I really am, better get used to it.” He gave you a wink.

You stopped in front of the entrance to the dorm and faced him, “I know you’re better than that.” You gave him a disappointed look and slammed the door behind you before he could follow you out the door. You immediately shrieked when you found Jungkook on the stairs as if he was waiting for you.

“Come with me.” He grabbed your wrist and dragged you away.

“Look, I saw Jimin take you somewhere earlier and I just want to give you a fair warning, my cousin is something of a manwhore. Or he wants us to think he is.” He let go of your wrist and crossed his arms over his chest and continued walking, “He’s really sensitive, but I can say he’s fond of you.”

“Well, he’s fond of nearly every female he meets.” You rolled your eyes.

“That doesn’t make him a bad person.” This made you shut up.

“The only reason he’s like that is because of me.” He had stopped you in front of a dormitory and you looked at him puzzled.

“Lisa asked me to bring you here.” He shrugged.

You slowly walked up the stairs and before you could knock on the door, the door slammed open to a think blonde girl who beamed at you.

“Y/N!” She gave you a big bear hug, “It’s so great to see you! I’m sorry I had to ask Jungkook to bring you over but I couldn’t risk Yoongi seeing me.”

“You know he doesn’t hate you right?”

She nodded eagerly and giggled, “Oh I know! It’s because of something else. But now’s not really a good time to talk about that.” She gingerly grabbed your wrist in her hold and pulled you upstairs to what you assumed was her room.

“You’re like me! I see it in your dreams.” Her eyes twinkled with hope, “For the longest time I’ve waited for someone like me. Nobody understands me, so a lot of the time I’m alone. You will be my friend right?”

“O-of course.” You smiled nervously at her.

“Great! So you’ll need this.” She shoved some clothes in your arms.

“What are these? I have clothes at the dorm.”

“None for a party like this.” She scoffed, “By the way, when my roommate gets here we should all go to town to find something that doesn’t look like it came from the Victorian era for you.”

“I’m sorry, but what’s this for?”

“The party our dorm’s throwing tonight! You’re going, so I can show you off to everyone!” She squealed.

“Okay, I’ll go but on one condition.” She looked at you quizzically, “I need you to give me your number.”

That’s how you ended up later that night in front of the dormitory booming with music dressed in the cropped black halter top, skinny jeans and bomber jacket Lisa had given you. You didn’t even get to tell anyone you were going out; apparently they all went out except for Yoongi who was the one who told you they all left. Lisa opened the door with an even bigger smile than before if that was even possible.

“Y/N! I’m so glad you’re here!” She latched on your arm and you smiled to yourself, growing up you never really had a female friend to do stuff with, with the exception of Jennie of course.

“I want you to meet someone.” She jumped up and down in excitement, “She just got here but I really want you to meet and get along with her.” She pulled you to a room where you instantly saw Namjoon.

“Namjoon!” His head snapped to you and he gave you a welcoming nod.

“Okay so Y/N… this is Jennie Kim!” Lisa gestured with her two hands to the pretty girl sitting on the sofa who was watching your every move.

“Well well, as I live and breathe, Y/N!” She got up to hug you.

“You know each other?”

“We grew up together before I came here.” Jennie smiled at you. “Go ahead and enjoy, we’ll catch up later when things have quieted down.” She waved you away.

You made your way to the coat rack to hang your jacket when eye contact with Jungkook who looked bored at Jimin’s side while his cousin talked to a bunch of girls, he waved you over but you shook your head. “Manwhore.” You mouthed to him. He let out a laugh and patted Jimin shoulder before he made his way towards you.

“Thank God I found you over here. I felt like I was going to die.” He drank the rest of his drink. “Let’s get you one of these.” He gestured to the red cup in his hand.

“I’d love that, thank you.” You followed him to the kitchen completely unaware of the blue eyes that followed your every move.

“Namjoon realized that if we mix alcohol in blood, then that becomes the equivalent to liquor in our culture.” Jungkook laughed. “Sounds disgusting, but tastes phenomenal. I swear!” He handed you a cup.

“Guys!” Lisa wrapped her arms around you two, why don’t we move this to the living room.” She smirked and pushed you two along with her to the living room.

You leaned against a wall and Jungkook put his hand next to your head as you made small talk.

“You’re gonna fit in here just fine.” He whispered.

“Really? I was really nervous about that!” You tried to yell over the speaker, “By the way, are you guys a thing?” You gestured to Lisa and Jungkook who only busted out laughing.

“Like I’d ever! No offense Kookie!”

“None taken.” He smiled and waved his hand.

“So if you have any plans of making him yours, please go right ahead.” Lisa pushed you two together to make a point. “And make it fast before one of his fan girls pull a fast one and drink form him before you can.” She looked around before smirking, “I’m just gonna leave you two here. You two play nice now.” She gave you two a wink.

“I am so sorry about her.” You giggled. “And I’m sorry if I’m a lightweight.” You looked at the cup in your hand, “I’ve never drank before so…”

“That isn’t your fault actually, there’s more alcohol than blood in that.” He looked into the empty cup in your hand, “why don’t I get us a few more?” you nodded slowly and stayed put when he left.

“What are you doing here?” You found his eyes before you could process what he was saying.

“Lisa invited me here.” You leaned your head back, “She’s my best friend now apparently.”

“Just because she asked you to come here doesn’t mean you have to.” Jimin rolled his eyes.

“But I actually did have to; I got you this by the way.” You took his hand in yours slowly pausing at how warm his hand was, “here.” You put the small piece of paper with Lisa’s number on it only for him to crumple it and throw it on the floor, “I never really fucking wanted it.”

You heard a number of voices calling Jimin that had you straightening up, “Better go get’em them.” You gave him a condescending smile before he left.

When people started going home and the music finally died down, you sat outside on the front porch with Kookie swirling your drink in your hand. “Your cousin’s a jerk.”

He took a small sip and chuckled, “He’s just like that because he doesn’t know how to express his fondness clearly.”

You stared at his hand and remembered how warm Jimin’s was and without thinking, you grabbed it in yours and intertwined your fingers with his. He looked at you with a flushed face as he stammered.

“You know, for cold-blooded killers, our hands are pretty warm.” You stared at them then smiled at him and then you realized just what you were doing, “S-s-sorry!” You quickly let his hand go only for him to chase you hand and hold it in his again.

“It’s fine. I like it.” He smiled up at the night sky as the quietness of the night surrounded you two.

A few hours later when the sun began to rise, Jungkook went home and everything in the Lilac dormitory was quiet, including Lisa and Jennie who were currently pushing you up the stairs to their room so you could sleep over. They pushed you on one of the beds and started jumping and when they got tired they laid next to you and squealed about everything that happened.

“You know, Jimin was staring at you and Kookie the whole night.” Lisa nudged you.

“Is that why you were so dead set on leaving me alone with Kookie?” you raised an eyebrow at her. Jennie laughed aloud.

“And what about you? Where were you when I needed you?”

Lisa suddenly got up and started jumping around, “She was probably playing tonsil hockey with Namjoon.”

“Yah! Lisa!” Her eyes widened dramatically as she hit Lisa with a pillow.

“You and Namjoon? Really?” You stared at Jennie in disbelief.

“Reaaaaally.” Lisa teased, “It was business at first, but she really couldn’t resist.”

“Business?” You tilted your head.

Jennie sighed and tried to get Lisa to calm down, “Basically, Namjoon and I are arranged to be married, and somewhere along the line, I guess I really fell for him.” You smiled at Jennie’s sweet words before being interrupted by Lisa’s fake gagging noises.

“You are seriously sickening Jennie!” She hopped on the bed and started jumping on Jennie.

The morning after, you seriously started regretting your chosen schedule when you found Lisa sleeping at the foot of the bed hugging your leg and Jennie on the floor probably sleeping their hangovers away. You slugged your way to class in your haphazardly thrown on uniform which Namjoon just so happened to drop by after Jennie asked him to but not before he scolded you about sleeping anywhere else but the dorm.

“Wow, you make the walk of shame look beautiful.” Jimin caught up to you.

“Why are you here so early?” You squinted your eyes at him.

“I have class and judging from your appearance so do you.” He had a bounce in his step, “So I take it things didn’t go so well with Jungkook last night? He came home and you didn’t so you must’ve slept with someone else-“

“Can you for once not be a jerk? God, you’re so hot and cold. One minute your fine and the next you’re the biggest jerk to have ever graced the planet. If you must know, I slept over at the Lilac Dorm.” You rolled your eyes at him, “You’re unbelievable, seriously.” You scoffed at him.

“Wait.” He grabbed your wrist suddenly, “Don’t do that again.” He stared at you straight in the eyes, “You had me worried and kept me up all morning.” He sighed, “The room you’re looking for is at the end of the hall, see you in Biology later.” He left without giving you another look.

When you got your text book in history, the teacher who you think was called; Mrs. Song let you out early. But when you made your way to the courtyard under a tree to shield you from the sun, you only then realized that it was only 2 and your next class was later at 6. You glared at the patches of sun that wasn’t covered by the tree’s leaves until you fell asleep. You woke up with your lips against someone’s neck, looking up you realized it was Jimin who was looking down at you.

“W-what are you doing here?!” You jumped up in surprise.

“Relax, I got here a few hours ago and I wanted to sleep so I did, but you started to lean on me and what kind of gentleman would I be if I woke you up?” He got up and stretched, “Anyway, we should get going, Biology’s just about to start.” He pulled you up and for the first time, walking with him was quiet.

You arrived in the lab late, but seeing as you were new, Mrs. Lee let you off with a measly warning, you heard someone whispering your name and that’s when you saw her. Lisa was sitting by herself waving at you to sit next to her but you only shrugged your shoulders with a pitiful look on your face when Jimin dragged you to the nearest empty table. You were caught by surprise when a pencil was poked into your back, turning around to snap at the person you were met with Lisa.

“Could we switch?” She gave Jimin a sickly sweet smile.

“Hmm.” He pretended to ponder her request, “How about no?” He gave her a smile as well.

She looked at you with desperation in her eyes and pleaded, “Look, I really need you to be my partner since I’m pretty sure the only other person who would take this subject is who I think it is and right now there’s only one empty seat and-“

“Ah, Mr. Kim please sit next to Ms. Manoban, seeing as it’s the only available seat.” Lisa’s face got paler than it already was and she stiffened in her seat glaring at Jimin who was laughing silently by himself. "I hate you. I swear to God, don't you dare fall asleep I'll haunt your fucking nightmares asshole." She whispered venomously.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He shrugged.

You looked at Taehyung who was sat next to Lisa. He gave you a smile and a quick two finger salute while Lisa remained paralyzed in her seat.

"Jimin." You nudged him. He didn't look at you as he scanned the book.

"Jimin." You squeezed his hand.

"What?" His eyes snapped up to yours.

"Are they?" He gave you an incredulous loo and scoffed.

"Yeah right." He looked at you, "She wishes."

"Then does she...?"

"Absolutely." He gave a mischievous smirk in Lisa's direction.

"And does he know?"

"Hah! That's funny; he's as dense as a brick wall!" Jimin wiped fake tears from his eyes as he laughed.

You stared back at Lisa as she gave you a pleading look; you mouthed a sorry and gave her a thumbs up. When class ended, Jimin was practically skipping with glee at the situation he'd created. Lisa slumped as she sat in Jimin's former chair.

"He is such an asshole." She sighed.

You patted her on the back and gave her a sympathetic smile, "You could always switch partners with me-"

"Yeah, maybe." She returned your smile and then frowned suddenly, "When hell freezes over." She stomped her feet as she followed you to the lecture hall to Vampiric Mythology and Ethics.

"What even happens in this class?" She crossed her arms over her chest and huffed, "Are we gonna eat garlic to prove a myth wrong or something?"

You pulled her inside, "Garlic isn't lethal to Vampires, it just burns our throat. I doubt any experiments are gonna happen, this is a Social Science, purely conceptual."

"Seriously? I thought that only happened to me cause my mom's huma- oh hey Jungkook!" She flailed her arms around to try and get his attention which worked when he started approaching you two.

"Hey. I haven't seen you since the party." Lisa pointed out which caused both yours and Jungkook's faces to go red.

"Wait..." She pointed an accusing finger at the both of you, "Did something happen?" The mischievous twinkle in her eyes had come back.

"Nothing happened." You insisted.

"You'll dream about it, I know you will." She pointed at Jungkook.

"Don't you dare tell her anything." You looked at Jungkook who pretended to lock his lips.

"Why don't you go ahead and sit over here." She pulled your seat along with you into the middle. "Now you have the best of both worlds, your beautiful endearing best friend and you possible future boyfri-"

"Welcome to Vampiric Mythology and Ethics!" A small round man made his way to the front of the class, "today we'll be talking about some of the known myths in our community."

You heard the door slam shut and a few minutes later you felt Jungkook turn around, swiftly you did the same only to find Jimin, you nudged Lisa and she looked behind as well. She gave you a quiet thank you then proceeded to flip off Jimin.

"Okay so any questions? Does anyone want to bring up a myth they'd like to be proven or disproved?" The teacher was walking along the front and looked to be juggling invisible items in his hands.

Lisa's eyes widened and stretched her arms up and stood up just as fast, "Can garlic really kill us?"

"Actually no. We'll only burn our throats a little but that's about it.

She clutched your arm tightly, "Oh my God Y/N, you were right!" You giggled at Lisa's childishness.

"Yes, Mr. Byun."

"Well uh, I've heard about this thing, I think it was called Blood Tethering?"

"Ah yes, one of our lesser known myths. That is in fact true." The teacher quickly wrote the words blood tethering on the board, "This is the sacred rite between vampires who back then were arranged to be married, but given our modern times, it is used by vampires who, to put it simply, have fallen in love."

"How do you do it?" Jimin's voice was loud through the quiet classroom.

"Well, this is called a blood bond nowadays, a tether. When two vampires are in love, this is the exchange of blood between the two. They continuously feed off each other." He crossed his arms, "now there are myths surrounding this blood tether, first of all, telepathy is indeed true but only towards the individual which you shared a blood bond with and this also depends on how strong it is or grows, for example right now I can talk to my wife in my head even though when we first shared blood, we could barely hold a telepathic conversation between rooms. Secondly, a vampire's thirst can only be quenched by the vampire's true love." The class erupted in fake puking noises. "Yes yes I know, it's very cheesy, but this is true. You could drink another person or vampire bone dry and still mot be full when you've found the one."

"What about if the other isn’t really in love?" you raised your hand.

"Well, the blood tether still remains a sacred rite to this day especially in the more prominent pureblood households as rare as the House of Ravnos to the more common ones such as the House of Malkave, so I hope none of you plan on giving away blood to whoever whenever, but this is called a partial tether.  One partner feels everything I mentioned whole the other only experiences the ability  to communicate telepathically." The sound the bell suddenly caught the teacher's attention, "oh my, we've gotten so engrossed in the topic, research on myths on blood preferences and i 'll see you next week class."

"Ugh, that was brutal, three classes three hours each. I don't know how I survived." You walked with Lisa home. She massaged your shoulders while walking with you "at least you get hone first. I have to walk a few more blocks by myself!" She complained.

"Aw. You poor child." You made a pouty face at her. "Anyway, I really need a power nap. Bye!"

"We're going out later don't forget!" You gave her a thumbs up before entering the house.

But in the end you did forget, which may have become a good thing because when Lisa knocked on the door angrily, it was Taehyung who opened it.

"Y/N! Lisa's looking for you!"

"Shit! Tell her I'll be down in five!"

"Take all the time you need!" She yelled back still mesmerized by Taehyug.

He looked at Lisa then at the stairs, "She'll be down in five." He shrugged, "come right on in. Go ahead and wait for her in the living room. I was just watching some anime." She blindly followed Taehyung on the couch.

"What is up with all the screaming in this house?" Jimin came running down the stairs dressed up and ready to leave the his eyes landed on Taehyung and Lisa, "Oh, I get it. Hey Taehyung." He said in a sing song voice.

Lisa quickly gave Jimin a "Get the hell away from us." Look but that only made him want to approach them all the more.

"Who's your friend there Taehyung?"

"This is Lalisa Manoban. Yoongi's little sister. She has Bio with us and she’s in our Literature class also she's in my AP Chem class."

"You seem to know a lot about her buddy."

"I guess so. Well I know a lot about everybody. Like how you deliberately took a schedule that was the closest to Y/N's and-"

"I really need to leave." He slammed the door.  

"I'm sorry I forgot but my nap really became sleep." You ran down the stairs.

"It’s fine just don't let it happen again." Lisa said in a dazed voice. Jennie's waiting for us she smiled.

"Bye Taehyung." You quickly pulled Lisa out of the front door.

You sat with Jennie and Lisa at a plaza purely inhabited by vampires near a smoothie shop. You caught Jennie staring at you with a scrunched up nose.

"You really need new clothes." Jennie puckered her lips and grabbed her chin between her thumb and bent index finger.

You hugged yourself instinctively, "but I like my clothes."

Jennie and Lisa then exchanged a look then got up and proceeded  to drag you to a store called Wasteland.

Lisa squealed on delight as she ran through the aisles, "as you may have noticed, this is Lisa's favorite store." You laughed as you watched her twirl and pick out clothes for you, ":isten, I won't always be here so I'm really glad you're here both for her and for me."

"Jennie-"

"Look, about what happened when we were younger, I'm just really sorry that you took all the blame for what happened to that kid back then and I wanna thank you because I wouldn’t have met Namjoon if they didn’t send me to Cross."

"It's nothing. I would've messed up sooner or later and they would have made me undergo homeschooling, and I’d like to think that as destiny." You stared at her as she hugged herself tightly still guilty at the fact that she let you take the blame all those years ago, "I don't care about that. What’s important is that we're here and I really need new clothes." You made her laugh.

You stood in line as Jennie and Lisa stood on each of your side. "I don't think I can wear this." You face paled as you gave the woman at the counter your card.

You walked out the store next to Jennie as Lisa led the way. “You like him.” She broke the silence.

“Excuse me?” You laughed.

“Jimin, you really like Jimin. He like you too but he’s too much of a coward to make a move because he doesn’t think he’s ‘worthy’ enough for you.” She rolled her eyes.

You sighed in defeat, “I don’t think I’m allowed to like him Jennie, my dad would kill me if he found out.”

"Y/N, you aren't a damsel in distress anymore. You've escaped the tower and now you need to know what it's like to be free, and if that means going out with a guy who your father doesn’t approve of then do it. He’s not here to tell you what not to do anymore. Go be with him if you like him so much, Lisa may hate him but she’ll get over it." Jennie shook your shoulders as you three walked back to Jennie's car, but the three of you stopped midway in shock due to the state Jennie's car was in. The glass was broken and the tires were cut, while the body was vandalized and smeared with what smelled like pig blood. She quickly dropped her bags and took out her phone pressing the buttons a few times before someone finally answered.

"You need to come here right now." She said urgently, "I don't care if you're studying! I said that we needed you here so you better come here." She tapped her foot impatiently.

"Holy shit." Somebody yelled from behind you catching you completely by surprise.

"Oh my God!" You screamed out at Namjoon's sudden presence he, apparently popped up from behind you and stared at the damage

"We need to take this to the council. Well I need to take you two back to campus first." He hugged the three of you and you felt a sudden spark until you opened your eyes only to be standing in the middle of your dorm's living room.

For the next two weeks Namjoon and Jennie were nowhere in sight. Lisa told you constantly not to worry and even though you tried, you couldn't help but worry especially when Hoseok would try and fail miserably to control the boys whenever you were all gathered together, Yoongi looked paler as he helped Hoseok in disciplining the boys, and everyone acted fine on the outside like this was a normal thing, but it was Jimin who helped you through the past couple of weeks. A week later they came back without even a pip of what happened to them, they never mentioned it so you never asked, according to Jimin this was how it usually was when Namjoon disappeared for days.

"I just don't see why it's such a big deal." You sat in the middle of Jimin's floor.

Jimin paused from his reading and looked at you from his bed, "Well why wouldn't it be? A pureblood whose mother has a prominent position in the senate got her car practically defaced. I don't know if you've been listening Y/N, but the riots are getting worse. Hate crimes like what happened a couple weeks ago are sure to happen. It was only a matter of time."

"Poor Jennie, I can't imagine how shaken she must be." You drew patterns on the carpet with your finger.

"You should feel more bad about the ones who defaced her car. They'll have hell to pay if it was Jennie who handled them."

"Executions ended in the 19th century. There's no way they'd hurt a coup of vampires who messed with a car right?"

Jimin pinched the bridge of his nose, "Y/N you of all people should know how prestigious purebloods are in our community. This simple act is proof of going against the Council and their constitution so it may not seem like a big deal to us but to the council, it’s an act of defiance." He stared at your confused face and sighed, "Taehyung. Come on out, I know you're there. You'll need to explain this to Y/N."

You looked around the room but it remained silent, "Taehyung's in here?"

"He's been here since you got here." He rolled his eyes and pointed at the open window where a bird was perched.

You stared at it for a while before Jimin got up to close the window and lock the bird outside when you heard his voice, "God! Okay okay! I've been here for the past hour. We're the only three in here so getting locked out while everyone else is in class for a few hours isn't exactly the best idea." He scratched the back of his head.

"Y/N here has some questions for you."

He looked at you and sat down pulling Jimin with him so all of you were sitting on the floor, "Go ahead. I'm very willing to answer your questions. But don't expect much. If it's stuff likwhat your were talking about earlier it’s better to ask Namjoon but he'd never tell you anything you didn’t already know."

"Cut the act Taehyung. You don't need to act like you don't know anything here." You squinted your eyes at him, "in fact, you know better than anyone what's happening."

He looked down and grinned a devilish grin, " Man, nothing gets past you does it? Hahaha Jimin, I like her! More than I did before." He laughed and then stopped suddenly, he looked at you seriously almost like a switch, "I know everyone thinks I’m an idiot, but you’re the first one who’s figured it all out. This has all been one giant joke for me, because when the time comes, and it will, I’m the one everyone least expects to step up. All that responsibility by big brother’s being dealt with, I mean just look at how Jin turned out, I don’t want that. But I know about the dark side of the council, deep in our home I can hear the whispers in between the walls, I can hear them."

"Tae. What dark side? What are you talking about?"

"This is the difference between Malkave and Erebus. The council is at your father's feet, but it’s Malkave who made it what it is today. We're a political family who is neutral in this pending war of Blood which was a good idea to your father to assign them the prominent family in our politics.” He approached you and slowly stroked your hair in a teasing manner, “Now Y/N, do you know why that's dangerous?" He brought his lips to the shell of your ear and spoke softly and slowly as if what he was about to tell you held the secret to the universe, "because we lack morals and the ability to distinguish right from wrong." He whispered.

"I need you to tell me what I need to hear Tae, what does the council do to vampires who go against the constitution?"

He gave you a breath of a laugh then smiled, "They kill them." He spoke deeply. "All vampires who have powers are required to help too, orders are sent out by the council to get rid of an Ashblood gone astray and we kill them." He sighed then gave you a bored look, "the rest will have to come from everyone who's involved though. I don't feel comfortable sharing too much." He got up then dusted his clothes.

"Thanks Taehyung." You looked up at him to find that he was already giving you a goofy smile.

"No problem Y/N!" He laughed, "You owe me though." He gave you a stern look before giving you a goofy smile again then left

Jimin touched your shoulder softly, "you okay Y/N?"

"I think we need to hold a house meeting." You looked at Jimin. He's been the only one willing to help you these past couple weeks seeing none of the others would even mention Namjoon. "Jimin, I wanna say thanks. You're the only one who's helped me."

"It's no big deal. I know how much you hate being left in the dark." He ruffled your hair and led you out his door. You stopped in front of him where the doorframe acted as the only thing in between you two, "You would've cried like a baby if I didn't help you out. Just go on a date with me, and we'll call it even" He joked.

You thought for a minute before you reached up to him and kissed the side of his mouth, "Sure, one of these days, let's go out." You gave him a small smile, "I really mean it Jimin, thank you. I was wrong about you." You retreated to your room and closed the door slowly. You waited near the telephone plugged in your room, and made up your mind. You dialed Lisa's number and it rang a few times before she finally picked up.

"Hello?" Her voice was gloomy.

"Lisa."

"Y/N! Hey! You didn't come to class today and Jimin didn't either so I thought you guys were skipping or something."

"Lisa, listen. I need your help. You need to bring Jennie here."

"Sure, no problem. I'll see you later okay?"

"Yeah, see you later." you sighed.

You sat around in your room waiting for everyone to come home, you opened your door and stared at Jimin's door contemplating on hanging out with him again when you realized just how embarrassing what you did was so you closed it back shut and you picked up a book and read to pass the time and when you heard Jennie's confused voice from downstairs, you slowly walked out and stared at them from the top of the stairs.

"Guys." They stopped their chatter and looked at you. "Let's all go to the living room." You led them.

They found a seat  on the sofa or on the floor as they made themselves comfortable, you stood in front of them and let out a breath.

"Did something happen?" Namjoon asked, you looked at Namjoon then at everyone else.

"We need to talk."

[slutforagoodsmut]

Imagine: Dracula’s daughter

She had always been a daddy’s girl, that was certain. Since she was an infant she was attached to him by the hip, always followed him around the castle, always found him fascinating. Of course she loved her mother and Alucard as well. Days her father was busy she’d stay in her mother’s laboratory, watching Lisa mix medicines and asking questions.

“What is this?” she’d ask, barely able to look over the table. Her mother would only laugh and pick her up, sitting her down on the smooth slab of her work space. 

“This is a new medicine I’m working on. It will help sick people become strong and healthy, just like you!” Lisa would poke her daughter’s tummy and the little dhampir girl would squirm in a fit of giggles. She loved her mother, she looked up to her.

Her and her brother always found things to do around the castle, painting and writing poetry, playing tag or hide and seek, which Alucard always won for some odd reason. 

“You cheated!” she whined, crossing her arms. 

“I did not!” Alucard stuck his tongue out at his sister. “I’m just older and faster than you!”

“By a minute! You are older by a minute!” 

And at the end of the day, the young dhampir would always find herself in her father’s study, reading a book beside him or begging him to read to her. She’d always end up falling asleep in his lap and he’d carry her to bed, tucking her in and kissing her goodnight. He loved her, he loved his little girl with all his undead heart. Of course there was Lisa, the love of his life, and he did love his children equally, but she always had a special place in his heart.

As the years went on, the girl blossomed into a beautiful young woman. She had long, onyx locks like her father and a sharp tongue like her mother. She was snarky and always had something to say, but she was kind and she was loving, and she had such a big heart full of passion and wonder. She wanted to help others just like her mother, often visited houses of the ones who Lisa was close to and aided her mother if she needed it. Alucard and her loved to duel one another, and she made sure she always won. They picked on each other and instigated but it was all out of great fun. The princess took long walks with her father at night and he told her about his new discoveries between vampires and humans, and her being her, was always fascinated and wanted to know more. 

Like Alucard and her mother, she had the privilege of stepping out into sunlight without a problem. She grew her fangs in before her brother when she was a small infant, which to this day she enjoys hanging over his head. She was tall and strong, and very fast, as well as very skilled with a sword. She had long nails she could extend and retract and could turn into animals, making it easier to stalk her prey at night. 

Everything was....perfect, you might say. Her life was perfect, sure she lacked friends but she had a wonderful home and a loving family that she could depend on. 

That all changed after that horrific night in 1475. When Lisa Tepes was killed everything crumbled to dust. The love in the castle had disappeared, it was so cold and dark and stunk of misery. 

She grew strained from her father once Alucard had left home. She didn’t want him to go and he didn’t want to leave her, but they both knew it was for the best. 

In a year, it was almost like two complete strangers shared a home. Dracula made no effort to connect with his daughter as he was so caught up with damning the whole world to hell, and in that time his daughter pushed him away. She barely spoke with him, didn’t even attempt to at this point. He was so angry, so angry with the world and with everyone in it. Lisa wouldn’t have wanted this, her children knew that. Their mother was a part of the human race, mortality ran through the children’s blood. They were a part of them, and their father wanted to burn them all. 

She grew angrier and angrier with her father as the dreadful days passed on. He let these other vampires into their home and they did whatever they wanted! And what did he do, wallow away into nothing in his library, sitting in front of the fireplace every single day! Pathetic! Absolutely pathetic! 

One day, she had enough. Dracula’s daughter couldn’t stand a single day more in that castle, enraged with her father she planned to leave. She considered leaving without telling him, but she couldn’t bring herself to do it. So, with a satchel over her shoulder holding her most valuable things, she walked into her father’s library. The back of his chair was to her, and yes, he stared into his fireplace like he always had. 

“I’m leaving.” she spoke up, gripping the strap of her bag. Nothing, he didn’t say a word, he didn’t even move a muscle in his seat. His daughter only sighed, a tear rolling down her cheek as she turned away. “Goodbye, father.”

Part of her never wanted to see him ever again. Part of her wanted nothing more to do with her father, but she knew deep down their paths would cross again, and she’d end up in that castle once more. 

She was alone, really alone this time, she had no one to turn to, she kept her distance from strangers and if they gave her trouble she’d risk the danger and bear her fangs, making them all run away in fear. The one night, one fateful night, she had run into her brother and two others who accompanied him. She was running through the woods as night creatures attacked, she’d slaughtered as many as she could, but they were closing in on her. In that moment she felt powerless till three beings came out of the thick woods and ended the monsters’ rampage.

“Alucard?” she whispered, leaning herself against a tree, holding her side which bled a concerningly amount. 

He gasped, his eyes widened with shock as he looked at his dear sister. “Sister?”

“You have a sister?” The strange woman spoke up in her thick accent. 

“Oh god, not another one of you....” A tall dark haired man grumbled, slapping his hand over his face. 

Alucard’s sister ran over to him and threw her arms around him as hard as she could. She couldn’t believe it. She had so many questions. How was he here? Why wasn’t he underground like he said he’d be? Who were these people? 

Overtime, these questions were answered. The woman was a speaker, her name was Sypha, and that other oaf of a man was a Belmont, Trevor Belmont, a vampire’s sworn enemy. She thought they died off years ago, but never mind that. Her brother had woken from his year of slumber when the two of them accidentally found him (more so Trevor than Sypha) and asked if he’d help them in their quest.

“We’re going to the castle...” Alucard spoke softly. His sister sat across from him, staring quietly into the fire they had made. She wasn’t stupid, she could put the puzzle pieces together. They were going there to end Dracula’s terror for once and for all. Her heart broke, just like it had before. She had to come to terms with killing their father, it was such a painful thing to imagine but...if that meant millions and millions of people would survive, then so be it. 

“It just hurts, ya’know? I mean, how could anyone go through with the idea of murdering their father?”

“He’s not our father, not anymore at least.”

Alucard was right, she hated to admit it. That monster conducting all of this genocide wasn’t their father. Their father was loving and caring, and this man....wasn’t any of that. The king of darkness was blinded by a rage and there was no looking back. Their father died when Lisa Tepes took her last breath. 

One by one, she slit the throats of dozens. Striking her sword through vampire soldiers, beheading the generals who held councils in her very home, the ones who practically took her home away from her. Was it truly still her home, she couldn’t tell, all she knew it as now was Vlad Dracula’s hideout, nothing more. She would get her revenge on every last one of them, her fists driving through their chests and yanking out their still beating hearts, crushing them in her palms. How dare they mock her home as if it were their own little sanctuary. How dare they. 

“Alucard--you, Belmont and Sypha fight off those night creatures! I’m going to find our father!” She yelled as she climbed the steps. 

Alucard impaled a night creature “Be careful! He’ll hurt you!” 

But she was already down the hall and up the steps to her father’s library. Millions of thoughts ran through her mind. The guilt of it all, having to go through an act that would be considered unspeakable under God’s law. Half vampire or not, she knew she’d be damned to hell in the end. 

She took in a few breaths before peeking in. Her father, to her surprise, was not slumped in his chair but standing, he grabbed one of his forgemasters, Isaac, and threw him through his mirror. Isaac let out a scream and the mirror broke into pieces, falling on the ground. 

“Father.” She spoke, walking into the room. Dracula tensed up, turning his body towards the door, bearing his fangs. 

“My child, the betrayer.”

Her chest tightened, eyes wide. Betrayer? He thinks she betrayed him?

“I did no such thing.” 

“Lies!” He snapped, his eyes blood red. “You walked out of this castle and turned your back on your own father!” 

“Well you had already turned your back on me!” She screamed at him. “You didn’t try to make me stay! You didn’t even attempt to!”

“I knew what side you were on from the beginning. You were a lost cause.” Dracula’s voice was cold and harsh. 

Tears sprouted at the corner of her eyes. “How could you even say that?! You act like you were the only one who lost someone!” 

Dracula turned away from his daughter, seething with anger. 

“You weren’t there! You were never there! All you’ve done was cause havoc!” 

“I did it all for her!” Dracula roared, whipping around and towering his large body over hers. 

“And look where that got you!” She bellowed back at him, eyes now blood red as tears streamed down her face. “Look where that got you. You pushed Alucard away, you pushed me away. Mother would never--” Her body was thrown across the room and she hit the bookshelf, falling to the ground. She wheezed out, coughing out blood. He struck her. He...struck her. Her vision was foggy, but she could make out her father standing on the other side of the room. She tried to stand up but she couldn’t, her body didn’t let her. Again she tried, but she couldn’t do it. She hadn’t had blood in such a long time, she’s grown too weak. Why she didn’t consider that going into this mess she doesn’t know, but it was a stupid mistake. Suddenly her world went dark, and she laid unconscious on the ground. 

It wasn’t too long till she had woken up from her spot, her father no longer in the library. She could hear screaming from above her. She gasped, getting up as quick as she could and stumbling over herself. Alucard. 

She ran and ran, going up another floor, and then another. The dhampir suddenly collided with Sypha and Belmont. 

“You’re alright!” Sypha exclaimed. 

“Where is he!? Where is Alucard?!”

“Upstairs, with Dracula!” 

Her vampire senses tingled. His room. They were in Alucard’s old room. She bolted up the floors and down the hall. They were screaming, things were being shattered, she could feel the whole castle shake beneath her feet. 

Alucard was thrown against the wall, their father closing in on him, ready to finish the job. 

“ENOUGH!” His sister shrieked at the top of her lungs, stepping in between them.  Her father stopped in his tracks. 

There she stood, sword in both hands, pointing the tip against her own chest. 

“What--What are you doing?!” Dracula bellowed. 

Alucard shook his head, fear in his eyes. “No, don’t do it!” 

“I’d rather kill myself than live in this world with you, you monster!” 

With that, somehow Dracula had come to his senses. The night filled the room, the moonlight shining in through the window. Dracula gasped, his eyes no longer flaming with hatred, but filled with sadness. His daughter kept the sword where it was and she began to cry, hard, endless tears rushing down her pale face. 

“Look what you’ve done father...” She sobbed, hands trembling. 

Dracula stared at her, then at her brother, then finally his hands. “What am I doing? I....” he choked on his words. “My children, my son and daughter. I’m killing them Lisa. I’m killing our children.” He walked over to a painting that hung on the wall. It was of all of them; Dracula and Lisa, both holding their bundles of joy. He looked at his children again and truly realized how much hurt he’s caused them. How much pain he’s caused his daughter. She mourned in their home, alone, while he selfishly sought out revenge. “My daughter would rather end her life than live in a world with her father.” he looked at her, tears now running from his eyes, “These are the walls we raised them in, loved them unconditionally. These are the walls we painted, the toys we made for our son. I’m so sorry....I....what have I done?” Dracula walked over to her and took the sword out of her hands, pointing it’s sharp tip against his own chest and placing it back in her hands. 

“Your greatest gifts to me, and I’m killing them.”

Alucard got up and stood next to his sister, placing his hands around hers. He wouldn’t let her do this alone. 

“I must already be dead...”

Her heart pounded in her chest so hard she thought she was going to throw up. “I love you....” the girl managed to get out in a strangled cry, looking her father in the eyes. She could see it in his pleading eyes, silently begging them to put an end to his misery, to theirs and the world’s. In those quiet moments, he hoped she knew how much he truly loved her. How special she really was. 

She shut her eyes tightly for a second as her and her brother drew her sword into her father’s chest. He groaned in pain, blood spilling out of his mouth as more coppery tears spilled out of his eyes. 

She would forever be his little girl. 

WOOOOH that was a long one! I told ya’ll I’d write some sad shit. Ok I’m gonna go cry myself to sleep now, like, comment and reblog!🥳🥳

[aftqrglow]

A Blessing, Beautiful And True

pairing: bucky x fem!reader

word count: 3.2k

warnings: use of she/her pronouns; swearing if you squint; mentions of death; mentions of food

a/n: this is a rewrite of one of my old fics that i absolutely hated with my entire being. i hate this a little bit less djaksjsjs also pls ignore how i literally cannot write a good ending to save my life.

dedicated to @xsamsharons for lending me her name. i hope i did it justice mi amor ily <3

Bucky learnt to value things.

Not the great, terribly material things people around him seemed to rush after. Not money, not even when he was barely getting by.

No, for Bucky, it was the small, seemingly insignificant things.

The tiny toy WWII soldier figurine he found at a yard sale one Tuesday afternoon, the one with the missing arm. The near-exact model of the car his father used to drive—rusted around the tiny steel axel, the rubber wheels worn from use. That yellow screwdriver set that sat at the very back of the tool cabinet in the garage, unusable because of the cracked plastic handles and rusted steel, that looked exactly like the kit he had once used to fix up the plumbing in his first apartment.

Bucky was used to valuing the broken little things.

He never truly understood what loving something whole, something complete felt like—not until he met you.

You, in your white sweater and blue jeans, hair tossed up in a braid. You, your eyes that dancing with unbroken light, like the rays of the sun on the ocean on a bright summer’s day. You, with the sort of kindness he never truly thought he would ever be worthy of, not until you showed him that he was.

You, the girl he fell in love with before he could ever truly know what love was.

Steve might’ve been the first to notice. He was with him that day, the day he first saw you. They had been hunting for a Christmas present for Tony, and even though Bucky wasn’t exactly thrilled to have to attend, he wasn’t about to show up empty handed.  

Steve didn’t even realize that the sly-footed assassin wasn’t by his side until he had walked the two blocks from the mall to his car. Hands ghosting over the gun tucked into the holster hooked into his waistband, Steve retraced his steps, his heart thundering in his throat.

Until he heard Bucky’s laugh.

Not the obviously fake chuckles he used to placate those around him. No, this was the laugh he remembered, the laugh he thought Bucky had lost.

This was Bucky’s laugh—his Bucky’s laugh, before the world stole him away. Pure and innocent.

Happy—so undeniably, inexplicably happy.

The tension eased from his shoulders when he saw you. Steve knew who you were, of course. Everyone did—or at least, everyone who had been around after the Battle of New York. Everyone who had seen you walk among the rubble, bleeding through your jeans, helping dig survivors out of the rubble, guiding them to shelters. Everyone who had seen you do everything you could help those who needed it more than you did, until your legs finally gave way and the only reason you didn’t collapse to the floor was because Steve caught you.

But Steve also happened to know why you’d done it. Because you were kind. Because you were selfless. Because you knew what it was like to lose everyone you loved, and to garner the strength to build yourself up anyway.

You’d lost people too—everyone you loved, killed during the Battle. Your family. Your friends. It might’ve seemed cruel to be spared. Might’ve seemed like a cold, dark twist of fate—and for a time, it did.

Steve had never known anyone to be resilient the way you were.

And maybe, just maybe, he thought to himself, as he watched his friend from through the glass, maybe you would teach him to hold on to the tiniest sliver of hope too.

—

Bucky didn’t even like books.

The only book he’d read—aside from the coursework assigned to him in his school days—was The Hobbit. And even that had taken him an ungodly amount of time to finish.

So yeah, Bucky didn’t exactly like books.

But he still visited the tiny bookstore on the corner every day.

He didn’t even buy anything. He just looked around, running his fingertips over the spines of the books that jutted out of the wooden shelves, the sunlight turning his eyes into uncharted waters of the oceans, swimming with undiscovered secrets and untold lies.

You would talk to him. All the time, and with no trace of the usual pity or sympathy that he heard when he spoke to people. You talked to him in a way that made him feel like himself, in a way that made him feel like he just might rediscover the man he used to be.

That first time he’d seen you was burned into the back of his brain, the image of you standing there with a hip braced against a bookshelf, dressed in a white sweater and jeans, your hair pulled into a braid over your shoulder. He had watched as a strand escaped, falling into your face.

And him—he'd stood there, watching you talk to another woman he couldn't recall because really, how could he look at anything else but you? Bucky was certain he looked like a gaping idiot, both wanting your attention to turn to him, and dreading the fact that he would surely make a fool of himself if you so much as looked at him.

Back in the 40s, things would've been so much easier. He would already have said something witty to make you laugh, he would already have been telling you about the carnival down at the beach and asking if you wanted to go with him.

But when your friend left, and you asked him if there was anything you could help him with, his voice sounded strange to his own ears as he croaked, "Books?"

You had laughed—and he found himself laughing along. A true laugh—for the first time in a long time, the sound didn’t sound fake to his own ears. For the first time in a long time, he felt like himself.

Bucky had taught himself to value that which wasn’t whole—because he wasn’t, either. Love was give and take. Love was equal.

If he was to deserve your love, he would have to be whole again. If he was to deserve your love, he would make himself whole again.

—

There was a sudden shift in the way Bucky viewed the world.

It had been three days since he last saw you, but he walked in through those doors anyway. He had no cause, no reason—he just couldn’t go any longer without seeing you.

You were sitting by the bay window at the very back, reading a book. He took a second just to take you in, to get used to the fact that you weren’t just a figment of his imagination.

The second you looked up, your face split into a grin, like you were truly, genuinely happy to see him. He couldn’t remember the last time someone had smiled at him that way. “Hey, you’re back! It’s Bucky, right?”

He nodded. He couldn't trust himself to speak, not when he was sure he would stumble over his words, not when he couldn't bring himself to string together a coherent sentence in your presence. 

"What can I help you with today?" you asked, snapping your book shut and placing it on the table. 

"Uh... What're you reading?"

You glanced down at your book before looking up to meet his eyes again. Blue, you thought, supressing a smile. Icy blue, but warm nonetheless—familiar in the way most things aren’t. "Wuthering Heights. You've never read it?"

He shook his head no. "Never been much of a reader, no. Is it any good?"

"It's one of my favourites," was your answer, watching as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. The light caught the steel of the chain around his neck—the chain of one of those military-issue dog tags.

And maybe that was how it started—on that dreary cold Wednesday, when you'd stood next to the bookshelf by the window, telling him about your favourite book, but really all he could focus on was the late afternoon sun rendering the hue of your eyes several shades lighter, the soft slope of your nose, the fullness of your mouth. Every little detail about you was etched permanently into his mind—and he wanted to learn more.

He wanted to know everything there was to know about you. 

It was about closing time when he decided he had to go. Not because he wanted to, but because he had promised he would have dinner with Sam and Steve. And as much as Bucky wanted to stay, he was a man of his word.

Which is why when he promised you he would come see you as soon as he finished reading the book, you knew he meant it.

—

And you were right.

Two days later, he was back. 

It was raining that day, early in the morning when you were just about to open up. And there, standing under the awning in the freezing rain, was Bucky, the collar of his coat turned up against the wind, drenched to the bone.

"What're you doing here?" you asked, eyes wide.

"I just... I don't know," he said. Because he didn't. Bucky didn't even like books—but he did like being around you. There was a strange sort of calm about you, a sense of peace he'd only known in Wakanda. Around you, he was just Bucky—not Sargent Barnes, not the Winter Soldier—just Bucky. 

He liked being just Bucky.

You shook your head, but he could've sworn he saw the corner of your mouth tilt upwards as you fished your keys out of your pocket and unlocked the door. "Well, come on inside. I'll turn up the heat and get you something warm to drink. Christ, Buck, you could get pneumonia or something.”

He only nodded once. It didn't matter that he wouldn't get sick—not when the serum in his veins healed his body faster than normal. It didn’t matter that even if he could sick, he wouldn’t have cared, not when you were looking at him like that, with concern in your eyes for something other than your own safety.

You had a coffee machine in the back room, you told him. He followed you, lingering in the doorway as you bustled about, humming a tune under your breath. He recognized it as a song from that one Marvin Gaye album Sam couldn’t stop talking about. He recognized it as a song he wanted to listen to for the rest of his life, if only you were the one singing it.

He recognized that, for better or for worse, you would be his undoing.

—

After that, he came to see you every day.

When the weather got colder still, he brought you steaming cups of hot chocolate from your friend Bella’s café down the street. And on the days when he didn’t, he would head into the back room and make you coffee. You’d never had to tell him how you took it—after that in the rain, he’d somehow remembered what you liked.

You weren’t about to tell him, but you remembered what he liked too.

It started out simple—plum cider that you found on your weekly trip to the farmer’s market. An old vintage copy of The Hobbit from the forties. Rubber silencers for his dog tags that he never used but carried around in his pocket anyway—until eventually, you had something new for him every week, some insignificant thing that he looked at with the kind of childlike awe that made your heart twist into knots in your chest.

He walked you home too. Every evening, with his hands stuffed in his pockets, slowing his stride so that he could walk alongside you. He would stand outside, across the street, hands in his pockets, waiting for you to walk into the apartment you shared with Bella. Only leaving when the lights came on and he knew you were safe.

Bucky wasn’t much of a talker—you learnt that about him. He would spend all day sitting quietly in a corner of your store, reading one of the books he found on the shelf of used copies you kept in the back of the room.

He seemed to love those used books more than the new ones—books someone had already read, books that had already been loved.

He felt a little that way sometimes, too. A little too used for love, not loved enough for use.

But never when he was with you.

And you—you were falling for Bucky Barnes. A little by little, day by day, without even realizing it—not until it all came rushing to you one afternoon, like a dam breaking, like the ocean of his eyes pulling you under, especially when you felt his gaze on you from time to time, watching you as you worked.

That afternoon, a new shipment of books came in. You didn’t even have to ask him for help—he was already on his feet, snapping his copy of Anna Karenina shut, mumbling a soft, “I’ve got it,” as you signed for the order. Hefted the two cartons of books like they weighed nothing at all, and carried them inside.

There was a strange tightness in your stomach as you watched him, standing in the middle of your store—the only thing the Battle of New York hadn’t taken away from you—and you wondered just how it took so damn long to realize that the feeling of familiarity didn’t lie among these books, but rather, in Bucky himself.

—

It was a slow day, so the two of you spent the rest of the afternoon restocking the shelves. He asked you about each of the books, watching your eyes light up as you talked about your favourite ones, until conversation lapsed into a comfortable silence, the two of you basking in each other’s company as you worked.

You didn't even realize how much time had passed until you heard the door open and your friend Bella breezed in. She'd been here the first day Bucky had walked in, had noticed the way your eyes shifted to him mid-conversation like you couldn’t focus on much else when he was around. “Ready for lunch, y/n?”

You looked at Bucky, opening your mouth to ask if he wanted to come along. Not because you didn’t trust him to be alone at the store, but because you wanted his company. Because being around him felt like coming home.

He only waved you off. "Go ahead. I've got plans with Stevie. I'll be here when you're back though."

You believed him. You believed that he would always be around, for as long as you wanted. And you wanted forever.

"Was that the guy from before?" Bella asked, looping an arm through yours as you left the store, walking down the street. She brushed her fiery hair out of her eyes, turning her head slightly to look at you, yellow-green eyes filled with curiosity. “What’s his name?”

"Bucky. He... He's a friend," you said. 

"Well," Bella said. "He sure doesn't feel the same way."

"What do you mean?" you asked, confused.

"Y/n, he looks at you like you put the stars in his sky. Are you sure he's just a friend?"

"I... I don't know, Bella."

Because you didn't know what else to call him. Because you and him weren't friends in the way people usually are—you had always been more.

Bucky was always more.

—

"I've barely seen you," Steve said, picking up his can of Diet Pepsi and taking a sip. "Where have you been?"

"Around," Bucky mumbled. Because how could he explain why he was spending so much time at the bookstore with someone he'd only just met? How could he explain the magnetic pull he felt toward you, the inexplicable desire to just be around you?

How could he explain the way you made him feel like himself again?

But Steve knew. Steve always knew. He saw the growing stack of novels on his friend's bedside table, saw him reading at the kitchen table, book propped up against the jug of milk.

He also knew that all this was because of y/n. Because Bucky mumbled that name when he was too exhausted to even know what he was saying. Because Bucky talked in his sleep—and Steve could hear him calling that name through the thin walls that separated their rooms. "You've been at the bookstore?"

Bucky set his drink down. There was so use denying it—his friend would see right through him. Steve had known him for too damn long to believe in his lies. "She's so... I can't even put it into words. She makes me believe that there's good in this world. That all the things I did wrong don't even matter—not when I'm with her. It’s the way she looks at things, the way she’s capable of finding a little bit of good in everything. Like she found something good in me, Steve."

Steve knew it was true. Because he hadn’t seen Bucky this way for a very long time. Because he hadn’t seen that light in his friend’s eyes in a very long time, and ever since he met you, it hadn’t gone away.

—

Bucky had to leave for a couple of days.

He didn't tell you why—just that it was a work thing. How long would he be gone? He didn't know.

"I'll be back soon," he said. "I promise."

And he was. Five days later.

But Bucky was quiet—quieter than usual. 

It was a Sunday, and you’d somehow managed to drag him along to the farmer’s market with you. He walked alongside you, hands in his pockets, like he was aching to reach out and touch you but desperately holding himself back.

He’d almost gotten himself killed on that mission.

You took up too many thoughts in his head, too much space in his heart. And when the bullet narrowly missed him, grazing his ribs, his only thought was whether or not you’d miss him if he was gone.

You deserved better than someone who’s life was tied to the death of others. Someone who didn’t have so much blood on his hands.

A few paces ahead of you, Bella walked hand-in-hand with Bucky’s friend Sam. You were glad that Bucky had introduced them, glad that Sam made Bella happy in ways you’d never really known or understood before.

“Look at them,” you said, watching with a smile on your face as Sam quietly slipped a couple of oranges into Bella’s bag. “They look real happy.”

Then, turning to look at him, you smiled, and he couldn’t hold himself back anymore. Because you might deserve better, but he was selfish and stubborn, and the only thing he had wanted in so goddamn long was you you you.

“Go out with me,” he blurted, every thread of self-control he had so carefully cultivated to keep his head in your presence snapping. He felt like he was taken back to that December evening he saw you for the first time, when the words refused to leave his mouth, when you’d rendered him tongue-tied and helpless. Only this time, he couldn’t stop the words from coming out, not as he said, “One date, y/n. One date, and if you don’t have a good time, we can just forget it ever happened and move on.”

His heart shuttered when he saw the small frown creasing your brow, your voice soft as you asked, “Are you sure?”

“I’ve never been more sure of anything. I want to do this for the rest of my life with you, y/n,” he said quietly. “But for now, I’ll take that date.”

“Okay,” you said, nodding slowly. “Okay, Bucky, I’ll go out with you.”

He couldn’t help it. Bucky wrapped his arms around your waist, drawing you to him, lifting you off your feet and spinning you around until you were both laughing, childlike and breathless, blissfully unconscious of the knowing look on Sam and Bella’s faces.

Because really, how could he see anything but you? You had been it from the first day he saw, and you were it now—a blessing, beautiful and true.

tags:

@goldengoddess @wherearethesantreys @ughlantsov @for-bebbanburg @mriddlemethis @xleiaorgana @xsamsharons

if you would like to be added to or removed from my taglist, just send me a message or an ask off anon!

[shmaptainwrites]

Can I request a Coffee shop AU with the fluff number 3? Maybe Aaron's trying to help her bake a new recipe or she's showing him how to make a certain coffee and he burns his fingers?

Ps. I didn't intend for that the first question to sound like a coffee order "I'll have a latte with two shots of..." 😅🙈

Yes of course honey! I hope you enjoy it :)

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x gn!Reader

Warnings: Aaron accidentally cuts himself :(

Note: This is set when Hotch is still a lawyer, but he didn't get married to Haley

Bittersweet Cafe

There was nothing Aaron liked more than before or after a long day to go to the coffee shop across from the courthouse. Most of the other lawyers went to the faster paced commercial stores like Starbucks, but he liked the quiet.

It became his favourite place to work, where he would prepare for his cases and even on occasion spend his days off.

Maybe it helped a little bit that you were the owner, the kindest soul he’d ever met, someone who was constantly looking to give to others. Your cafe was a safe haven for those who just needed a place to be themselves, it was a place where the workers knew your name, a community with a sense of spirit.

Which is why he thought the least he could do when you were understaffed was to put his preparatory work aside and offer a helping hand.

“Oh Aaron, you don’t have to do that,” you waved your hand. “You’ve got that big case to prepare for,”

“(Y/N), it’s just high profile, we have witnesses and the defendant was caught in the act. It’ll be easier than most days, come on let me help out,”

You looked around, realizing now you were the only one behind the counter because your employee’s shift had ended and she needed to get to class.

“Alright, come put on one of these aprons and write your name on this,” you handed him a blank name tag and a chalk marker.

He hopped over the counter and came to the back while you quickly turned the sign showing that you had gone out for lunch.

“Okay, I have an hour to teach you how the hell to use all this stuff,” you pointed to the large espresso machines. “You think you can handle it?”

“Sweetheart, I finished law school a year early, I think I can do this,”

“We’ll see about that Mr. Cocky,” you teased.

Aaron actually wasn’t that bad at picking up how to use the different machines, he watched you use it once then internalized the instructions before doing it himself almost perfectly each time. So coffee definitely wasn’t his problem.

“Let’s try cookies then, see if you can work in the kitchen,” you grabbed his sleeve and dragged him into the back room where you had a small kitchen set up where you’d make your baked goods.

“Don’t you normally make these in the morning?”

“Yes, but I didn’t get a chance to make these ones because I was understaffed genius, and plus it’s Chantal’s birthday and these are her favourites and she’s coming later so I want to make sure there’s some for her,”

Aaron smiled a little as you explained your reasoning for needing the sweet treats, but you quickly moved on to telling him what he needed to do.

It took less than thirty seconds for something to go wrong.

Aaron was attempting to slice the frozen stick of butter so it would fit in the measuring cup, but the knife slipped and cut his finger.

“Shit!” he exclaimed and quickly dropped what he was holding before going to squeeze his finger and try to breathe through the stinging pain.

“Well I guess you’re not good at everything,” you teased and he frowned playfully.

“I just cut myself, aren’t you supposed to be nice to me?” he asked and you shrugged while grabbing the first aid kit and coming over to him.

“I don’t know, am I?” you raised a brow and he just rolled his eyes. “Okay, if you’re gonna be such a baby, what do you want me to do?” you said, first taking his hand in yours and examining the cut.

“I dunno,” he mumbled. “But… maybe if you kiss it better I'll feel alright,”

You could feel the heat rise to your cheeks, but you kept your expression serious.

“Aaron, how am I supposed to kiss your finger, it’s bleeding,” you asked, knowing exactly what he was trying to get to.

“Well,” he grabbed a small piece of gauze from the first aid kit and held it against his finger. “I’m sure it would have the same effect if you kissed me here,” he pointed to his lips.

“You’re really cheesy for a lawyer, you know that, right?” you asked, throwing your arms around his neck.

“If it gets you to kiss me then it’s worth it,” he hummed.

“Hmm, you’re about to be a very happy man then,”

You pushed yourself up on the tip of your toes and let your lips gently fall on his. You both tasted like different types of coffee, perfectly brewed, mixing together and making a fantastic blend.

His uninjured hand came to hold your head closer, squeezing you a little tighter when he heard you sigh.

When you pulled away you looked at him with a slightly cheeky smile on your face.

“I hope you don’t mind that being you method of payment,”

“I’d take it, gladly,” he nodded, dipping down and stealing one more kiss. “But I think maybe you should make those cookies, I don’t want to ruin Chantal’s birthday. I can stick to making the coffee,”

“Good plan,” you chuckled.

There was never a doubt that it was always a good day at the Bittersweet Cafe.

[shoutogepi]

Best Friends

┌───────── ⋆⋅✧⋅⋆ ─────────┐

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : 𝐓𝐨𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐢 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐨 𝐱 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 2.7k

[ ☁︎ ]  angst

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 : unrequited feelings :’( really brief mention of sex (not nsfw tho!) & also (underage?????) alcohol consumption! 

𝐛𝐢𝐨 : On your last night in the dorms, Shouto realizes he has feelings for you, his best friend. 

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 : idk honestly i started writing this last night and was gonna abandon it... but then val tagged me in an angst ficrec and i was like ok well! this is a sign to post bc then i will have at least one sho angst on my masterlist lolll oops :o

└───────── ⋆⋅✧⋅⋆ ─────────┘

   ─── ・°* ﾟ✧:* • ｡ﾟ:*･☽･*: ｡ﾟ•*:✧ ﾟ*°・ ───

🅃onight was the last night in the dorms. Three long years had come and went, and now everyone’s belongings were cleaned out and secured away with cardboard and tape, leaving an empty wing that was currently filled with bodies, neon lights, and red solo cups. Music was pounding through the hallways, reaching every room and allowing no one total escape from the celebration.

You had been occupying the dance floor with Mina and Tsuyu for the last half hour, and now that you had sweat off the latest drink of the night, it was time for you to set off and find your more moderate-tempered companion. The pink-skinned girl wiggled her eyebrows at you when you alerted them of where you were heading off to, Tsuyu planting a love tap on your ass as you made your way from the swarm of people. The frog girl wasn’t usually so loose, but the alcohol that pumped through everyone’s veins had left only a select few unaffected. Tsu, just like you, was one of the ones that was happily allowing the weight of daily student life slip from her shoulders.

There were plenties of warm bodies swaying with the heavy bass rattling the hallways, shadows of couples and interested singles leaning against the walls, whispers and rowdy laughs echoing as the entire graduating class of UA partied the night away. Skimming by the line outside the bathroom, your feet found their way toward the end of the hall easily enough, taking the path you had so many times before.

A creak sounded as you pushed the cracked door open, the sight of the open shoji screen allowing moonlight to stream onto the bamboo mat floor which crunched quietly underneath your tentative steps.

“Shouto?” you whispered his name, eyes taking in the silhouettes of the packed boxes against the walls before you turned and saw a shadow sitting on the mattress beside the door.

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

Your voice jolted Shouto from his wandering thoughts, his attention turning to you right away. He seemed surprised to see you standing there, and he peered up at you from his slightly hunched position on the couch. He acknowledged you with your name, his voice low and steady. By the sound of it, you wondered briefly if he had even had a drop to drink tonight.

Blinking at him a few times, you tried to adjust your eyes to the contrast between the bright moonlight and dark shadows. When you could finally see the planes of his handsome, somber face, you spoke, trying your best not to slur. “What are you doing over here all by yourself?”

He paused, lagging for a second before the corners of his mouth curled and his eyes crinkled at the sight of you. “Just thinking,” he answered, examining you in that intrigued way he always did. After a moment he must have reached the conclusion that you were some level of smashed, for he patted the empty space next to him on the bed with a smirk and said, “Come sit with me.”

For a moment you wondered why he was alone, but then your brain caught up with you, and you realized that his other friends were probably busy with their own issues or endeavors. Ever since Midoriya finally grew a pair and asked Uraraka out, the two had been going at it like rabbits every spare second they had. And you could only imagine how busy Iida was as class rep, trying to keep the party at least a little bit under control. Momo was definitely helping him, and you had seen Bakugou begrudgingly holding Kaminari up with Kirishima under his other arm when you’d passed by them in the hall… Leaving only you to come and rouse the half and half hero from his solitude.

“Well that’s not allowed tonight!” You exclaimed, fist slapping against the side of your thigh. You would’ve used both hands for emphasis had the other not been occupied with a half-full plastic cup. Your legs felt like jello as you moved toward him, his cool hand wrapping around your arm to offer his support and steer you into the spot beside him. You almost fell but he held you up with the one arm, chuckling as your butt finally met the safety of the duvet.

“Thinking’s forbidden?” he laughed at your insistence, the sound rich and deep as his hand lingered on your wrist.

“Yes,” you nodded vehemently, pulling your hand away from his to cradle your precious cup and shooting him a playful, sideways glare.  “Brain turned off for the night. It’s in the fine print of the party rules, of course.”

Shouto gave you a funny look, eying you from the side. He repositioned himself, sitting upright and closing his eyes. It was hard for him to remain stoic when the quiet sound of your amused giggles tickled his ears, but he managed a nod before his eyes settled on you again. “Okay, I think it’s off.”

Conversation was always natural between the two of you, he never had to struggle to keep it flowing. And he liked talking with you, being in your presence. Which was the only reason why he was still entertaining this ridiculous charade.

“How do you feel?” you inquired, a goofy grin on your lips.

There was a twinkle in your eyes as you teased him, but Shouto held no qualms with your playfulness. Most people were still afraid to joke with him, believing that he was too obtuse to understand humor. Sure, he had struggled with the transition to school life in the beginning of their first year, but after you had transferred into their class second year, he found himself opening up even more than he already had.

“I feel… the same.” The grin on his lips remained, his eyes settled on your drunken form. His gaze flicked to your smile, shining in the moonlight and making something twinge in his stomach. He cleared his throat, pushing down the feeling that haunted him every time he looked at you too long. “This doesn’t really work, does it?”

You pretended to entertain the thought for a moment, eyes rolling as you considered it animatedly before your lips broke into a beautiful smile again. “No,” you giggled, shoulders shrugging in your cute, drunken fit. “But it’s easier when you’re not sober!”

He turned, faux surprise hung from his brow. “You’re drunk?” Sarcasm dripped from his voice and splashed onto you where his jean-clad thigh brushed against yours.

“Shut up!” You punched at his shoulder and pushed him away from you, shuffling yourself in the process.

Your hair swished with the movement and suddenly the soft, sweet scent of you was crashing over him. He breathed it in shamelessly, allowing himself to indulge in the warm feeling that suddenly emanated through his chest.

“You could try it, if you wanted. It really does help,” you offered your cup to him, shrugging.

Shouto eyed the red plastic cup, hesitant. He really wasn’t one to drink, but then again, neither were you. Tonight was about celebrating your graduation from UA, opening the next chapter of your lives. The thing was, he wasn’t sure if he was ready to move on when it meant leaving all his relationships either behind him or pushed to the side. Okay, maybe he was kidding himself… there was only one person he would miss having in his daily life, and that person was sitting right beside him— the same one who was the source of his conflicted feelings.

“Or not!” your hand retreated and you took a little sip, the sweet jungle juice washing down your throat easily. “No pressure. It’s your choice, Sho.”

He nearly groaned at the nickname, the one he only allowed you to call him. Grabbing the cup from you, his calloused fingers brushed over your soft knuckles. He smirked at the excitement that surfaced in your gaze as he brought the lip of the cup to his mouth, emptying the contents in one long go. The liquid was sickly sweet, masking the bitter poison that entered his body alongside it.

“That was… truly disgusting.”

“Whaaat?” You balked, grabbing for the cup in dismay. He kept it out of reach, even though it was empty, setting it on the far table instead. “It’s good, I dunno what you’re on. It’s really, really good. Heheh, just like me…”

Shouto blushed at the innocent innuendo, looking at you as you closed your eyes and let out a noise between a sigh and a laugh. He gulped, realizing that the alcohol was already taking effect and he was beginning to slip under its influence. Your method of “turning your brain off” was proving to be much more effective with the alcohol’s aid, but that was a whole other issue which he failed to foresee. 

He usually preferred to keep his brain on and fully functioning, especially when he was alone, with you. That way, when you roused the butterflies in his stomach and pulled on his heartstrings, he could tell himself to just ignore it and focus on how important your friendship was to him. But now, his defenses were failing him, and there was nothing he could do to stop his heart from beating faster, palms getting clammier.  

“You’re good?” he reiterated quietly, watching the way your tongue swiped across your lips, enchanted by it.

You chortled, finding the thought entertaining, apparently. “Yes! I feel really good right now.”

“Ah,” he murmured, sitting back and allowing the pillow he had propped up to sink around his form. “I feel... kinda good, too.”

A mix between a laugh and a scoff escaped you at his confession. “You feel something already, Sho? Wow, that’s so efficient.”

Shouto didn’t really know what you meant by that, but he only smiled softly at the happy look on your face. He closed his eyes and listened to the fast rush of blood in his ears, the feeling of warmth prickling at his skin. He wasn’t drunk, per se, but he felt a little lighter than usual.

You had said that drinking would turn his brain off, but it seemed only part of it wasn’t functioning. The other side of his mind was working overtime, much to his chagrin. 

He was suddenly aware that this would be one of his last moments with you before everything would change. You were going to an internship not too far from his, only an hour away by train. But seeing you wouldn’t be nearly as easy as walking down the hallway… and it could only happen if the both of you found a time that worked and had the motivation to travel the distance to meet one another. He wasn’t sure if you wanted to do all that, just to see him.The realization hit him hard. 

No more sneaking to one another’s room and having whispered, midnight conversations. No more studying together and simply being in your presence. No more opportunities to let his gaze linger on you longingly, nor chances for him to grab your hand when your knuckles brushed against his in the middle of your walks. 

He felt sick at the thought of living without you. Maybe… maybe it was time for him to face his feelings head on. He had spent so long denying the recognition of them, the acceptance of them. The loss of you was imminent, unless he could finally force himself to say something, and it had to be soon.

As if you had picked up on his distress, you hummed quietly and shuffled closer to his side. His quirk spiked at the sudden proximity, heat flaring up as your head came to rest on his shoulder.

“I’m a sappy drunk, so I apologize for what I’m about to say,” you mumbled into his t-shirt, his skin prickling as your warm breath wandered through the seams and onto his skin. 

He huffed out a laugh to ease your worries, but he stayed absolutely still, unwilling to move a muscle in case it would somehow scare your body off of his. 

Then you whispered, “M’so lucky to have met you, Sho.”

Shouto choked on thin air, subtly wiping the moisture on his palms across the tops of his denim-covered thighs. Your scent surrounded him, and he couldn’t resist resting his head on top of yours, slowly breathing between your locks. “I… I feel the same, Y/n…”

It was quiet for another moment, his mind playing out a hundred ways to confess, trying to find the right words. Meanwhile, you were simply enjoying his reciprocation and the peacefulness of the quiet away from the party, completely unaware of his inner turmoil.

You sighed and he shivered as your breath scattered across his collarbone again, almost jumping when your fingers landed softly over his. How you remained so soft with their vigorous training, he had no clue. But your fingers felt so warm, so right lacing with his. His throat was thick with apprehension, a lump forming there as the seconds ticked by. It wasn’t often the two of you were sitting so close together, and he wondered if he was a piece of shit for thanking whatever God there was out there for you being kind of inebriated and so touchy right now. 

Slowly, he turned to look at you, eyes wide and conflicted, taking in how truly astonishing your beauty was up close. You lifted your head from your perch on his shoulder, gaze locking with his before your lips curled into a meek smile. Digits tightening around his, you squeezed his hand and rubbed your thumb across his knuckles.

He could feel his heart pounding in his chest, screaming at him to do something— anything— whatever it took for him to just form the words and tell you that he was in love with—

“Thank you for being my best friend.”

—you… He blinked, the words registering. 

You continued. “I know we’re moving away from each other, but I never wanna lose you. I cherish our friendship too much for that to happen, Shouto.”

Your words cut him. 

Friends. Friendship. 

His blood felt like it had frozen in his veins and he had become a statue, stock still as you carried on thoughtlessly, eyes now flickering over to the moon hung low in the indigo night sky. 

“Please promise me that we'll never change. We might grow as people, but… our friendship will stay intact, right? I don’t wanna grow apart.”

It hurt. 

Time had stopped and his lungs shriveled up, his body aching as if you had just lodged your knee straight into his ribs. His tongue tasted bitter suddenly, and he could almost hear the sound of his heart cracking.

But Shouto was good at hiding his emotions, years of compartmentalizing them giving him an edge that no one else he knew had. He kept his face neutral, even if it felt like he was withering and dying inside.

“I just… don’t ever wanna lose you.”

It was almost impossible to force his lips into a thin, hollow smile. But he managed, even if it felt like prying iron with a crowbar. He looked into your eyes and nodded.

He understood. To some extent, he truly understood. 

“I don’t want to lose you either, Y/n... Don’t worry,” he took a deep breath, forcing the next words out even if he felt like he was about to be sick.

He cherished his bond with you too much to risk chancing it, confessing to you, and throwing it all away after your certain rejection.  He loved you too much to ever hurt you, and he was too selfish to let go of you, too. The only one that would suffer from this was him, and he was alarmingly alright with that.

If it meant that he got to hold onto you, even for just a little bit longer. 

If it meant that you would be happy... Even if he wasn’t.

“We’ll always be friends... I promise.”

   ─── ・°* ﾟ✧:* • ｡ﾟ:*･☽･*: ｡ﾟ•*:✧ ﾟ*°・ ───

.

.

˚‧º·(˃̣̣̥∩˂̣̣̥)‧º·˚ ˚‧º·(˃̣̣̥∩˂̣̣̥)‧º·˚ ˚‧º·(˃̣̣̥∩˂̣̣̥)‧º·˚ 

afJSNKJKDKJ WRITING ANGST FOR MY BABY IS SO HARD AHH I LOVE U SHO PLS... reader is so dumb to see u only as a friend i hate that dumb bitch  ughhh (TдT)

➥ masterlist

𝐂𝐨𝐩𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 © 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐩𝐢 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟏 . 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

[alreadyblondenow]

Never get to hold you | Lee Haechan

Lee Haechan x female!reader x Lee Jeno

▸ Fluff, smut, angst? Haechan is poor ▸ Part of To All the Members I’ve Loved Before: Dear 127, hosted by me ​

Summary: Growing up in a fucked up household, Haechan has always been thankful for his friend Jeno for treating him like his real brother. From giving him food, to letting him stay in their big house, to lending him money for school. Jeno has always been an angel. Until one day, Haechan found another angel, you. Finally his life is now brighter than ever… but not for long, because Jeno likes you too. Will Haechan let this once in a lifetime love slip and give you to his true friend who’s always been nice to him? Or will he be selfish?

Work count: 6k flat amazing

Warnings: Smut, toxic household, mentions of parents fighting, Haechan is poor here, if you are not okay with the idea please click away. Unprotected sex, couch sex, mentions of rough sex, overstimulating, Haechan smoked one cigarette, mentions of alcohol, alcohol consumption, mentions of Haechan’s sister, break up, slight cheating? but not really A/N: Pure fiction. Haechan’s character here is inspired by Justin Fooley from 13 reasons why. And the friendship is inspired by Bryce and Justin’s friendship. hehe. Originally this is a cheating au, but I’ve been writing a lot of cheating au so.... lets do the right thing for now. HAHA. also I did not include a lot of smut just because it doesn’t fit the story so i hope you understand that and still enjoy reading this. <3 

A peaceful night that’s what Haechan longs for. A night free from the screaming and shouting of his parents, the glass shattering and never-ending blaming. He turns the volume up of the song he’s listening to from his mp3 player, closed his eyes, and tried sleeping. It’s not calming or whatsoever but it’s better than hearing the bickering.

For Haechan, sleep does not fix anything but it sure does make him feel better once he wakes up and finally faces another fun day in school. Yes. That’s right, Haechan loves going to school for it makes him feel like he’s a normal person. Not everyone in school knew how fucked up his life is and that’s another thing why he loves going to school. School and his friends have been his escape.

“You’re coming tonight right?” Jeno sneaks from behind and swings an arm on his best friend.

“Of course I’ll be there. I have to drive your drunk ass home-“ Haechan jokes but he was soon interrupted by something so unfortunate.

His shoes gave up on him.

“I think I should go and get this fixed before class starts. Not again,” Haechan said, stopping to remove his worn-out shoes and check them further while Jeno watch him.

“I have my Balenciaga shoes in my locker I don’t use that anymore. If you don’t want to keep it or accept it, at least use it for the day,” Jeno smiles at his friend and pats his back. But before Haechan could even say no to his best friend, Jeno is long gone for the school bell rang already.

Every since Haechan is new in town, Jeno has been a good friend to him. Both very different boys but they are brothers by heart and got each other’s back. For Haechan, Jeno is an angel to which he almost feels bad for not giving something in return for all the things Jeno gave him. Not just material things but Jeno offers financial help to Haechan too, in fact, Jeno is the reason why Haechan’s mother got a job at a store Mrs. Lee owns.

So you see, being a loyal and true friend is the only thing Haechan can give in return for now.

After school, Haechan fixed his wretched shoes before going to his part-time job. There, while he looks over the convenience store, he does his homework on the side and makes sure that he studies in advance so he can get closer to the college and scholarship that he’s aiming for and finally get out of this hell hole.

“You like studying so much?”

A voice made him drop his pen and went to work immediately. Punching the cashier and putting the stuff you bought in a plastic bag with a shy smile. A shy smile that miraculously lights up your day, he’s like a sun you thought.

“College. You’re new here right? I saw you earlier with the student body president. I’ve been there, being new in town will get easier... with the right people” Haechan says.

“Well, I had a bad first day, but thank you.... Hyuck. It’s great to know that eventually, everything will get better ” you read his name tag and smiled so sweetly at him. Oh, you wish it’s not obvious that you’re flirting.

When you left you’re all he could think of. He can’t stop thinking about your smile, how it’s obvious that you’re flirting with him but he thinks you’re so cute rather than flirty, he even beats himself up for not asking your name and making you stay longer.

As he walks his way home under a quiet night and with nothing in his head but your smile, he replays his only memory of you in his head while smiling alone and looking like a complete idiot. But when he was just a few walks from his house, he hears the screaming and shouting again.

He ran towards the door and straight to his sister’s room, not giving a fuck about why his parents are fighting. He hugs his little sister who’s in tears and basically shaking from fear, keeping her close to him to let her know that he is here now. And this is the sadness and reality he had to face every day.

“You scared?” He whispers but his face shows no fear to show his sister that his big brother is ready to protect her.

“Where were you?” She whines and snuggles to her brother more.

“I was at work, sorry. You know something wonderful happened to me today,” Haechan ready himself to tell his sister how you two met for the first time. She has always loved Hyuck’s stories and she’s always interested in the people his brother is friends with, especially Jeno.

“Well, why didn’t you ask her name? Will you see her again?” She asks eagerly. “I want more stories about her, she sounds sweet even though your conversation was too short”

“Yeah I know. Maybe I can talk to her by Monday and tell her, ‘hey my little sister wants us to be friends’” he jokes.

And so the night went on, exchanging stories with his sister until his parents stopped fighting and eventually his sister fell asleep in his arms. To be honest,  he didn’t want to leave his sister alone after what happened tonight, but he promised Jeno that he will be there so he needs to be there.

Going to Jeno’s birthday celebration in a bar downtown is the last thing he wants to do after having a hard night. The bar was loud, packed, and it’s giving him a headache. So he promised himself that he will stay here for half an hour only, which did not happen because his heart feels heavy.

So he went out to have a cigarette and to clear his mind, having a debate with his conscience whether he’s going back in or not.

“The answer is no,” you said from behind which made him turn immediately and face you. “I’m watching you for a few minutes already and your feet is obviously hesitating to go back inside”

“It’s that obvious? Am I really that easy to read?” he takes one final hit from his cigarette before he throws it away. You nod with a smile to answer his question. It’s obvious that you’re happy to see each other again. “Why aren’t you inside? It’s cold out here,” he would give you his jacket if only he’s wearing one right now but he’s not.

“Everyone is loud inside and I feel like I’ve had enough of the screaming and overflowing booze, you know?” You answered awkwardly. Little did you know that Haechan feels the exact same thing. “But I should probably go and not ruin the silence here too so-“

“I can’t stop thinking about you” Haechan finally blurted out. He didn’t mean to but those are the words that came out from his mouth the moment he saw you turn and was about to walk away. “I don’t even know your name but my sister thinks your cool” he added, trying to sound fun and interesting. Heck, he’s trying to make you stay.

And it's working.

“You have a sister and you told her about me?” Haechan nods with a shy smile, “Well what did you tell her?” You asked with a flirty tone.

“I told her that I’ve never seen a smile so beautiful and that I feel stupid for not asking your name” he shamelessly flirts and came closer to you, making your heart beat faster and making you really nervous.

“Take me some somewhere quiet and I’ll tell you my name” you flirted back.

And without any second thoughts, he brought you to a place where you two can laugh out loud freely, and there's no loud music to bother the moment. You introduced yourself and all he did was giggle and tell you that his little sister will be happy about this. Haechan made you laugh nonstop, telling you the happy memories he holds dear and even small parts about his life, without fooling you and making you think that he’s someone else.

Now that he gets the chance to talk to you again, he wanted to embrace you while he pours all his honesty to you and hopes that you don’t mind liking someone fucked up like him. But Haechan thought that telling you that he’s poor as a rat on your first night together is not something worth staying for, so he shrugged it off and continue asking more about you.

Until you both lost track of time and he offered to walk you home, which you think it’s sweet.

“Do you want to have some water first, before you go? It’s a long way back. M-my parents are not home so no need to be shy,” you offered with a hint of other intentions that he surely understood. And thankfully he accepted.

The moment you closed the door, he stopped you from opening the lights, his hands are on your face and your lips touched immediately. Returning the kiss without hesitation, heads turning continuously and both tongues are wanting for something more.

You motion him to the couch and push him until he falls on the cushions and let out a quiet giggle. It was a pity that you wouldn’t see his bright smile. “You okay with this?” he slips his hand inside your shirt and smoothly removed it.

“More than okay,” you said and started to undo his belt and remove his pants. Soon, you’re both wearing only your underwear while grinding on top of each other. Shy to make a move but your kisses and moans say otherwise. You’re the one who initiates it this time, unclasping your bra and making him knead and cup your boobs shamelessly.

“Do I need a condom?” he asks, removing his boxers brief, throwing it on the floor, and immediately slipped his hand inside your panties while you’re on top of him kissing him like there’s no tomorrow.

You moaned softly when his fingers made contact with your very wet slit and told him, “No. But pull out?” he nods and told you he will. And because of that assurance, you finally removed your panties and went on top of him.

“It’s hard to pull out if you’re going to be on top, maybe next time?” He says and effortlessly switched your positions, putting him on top of you. He pulls away for a second and pumped his cock in between your opened legs, came in closer to kiss you before he pushes his in.

His kisses were gentle and sweet like he’s not about you fuck you in the next few seconds. But when he finally lined his cock and slowly thrust in, both of you moaned and forgot that you were kissing for a second. Sharp gasps escaped your mouth while delicious groans escaped from his. Slowly he takes his time pushing in and out without thrusting all the way, which surely builds the momentum and it definitely made you want more of him.

“I’ll go deeper” thankfully he noticed and pushed in finally. Thrusting a little bit quicker than earlier while his fingers are busy drawing circles on your clit.

Soon, you’re both on edge. Too shy to admit it but you can’t stop clenching and unclenching around him, “Stop doing that,” he says and kissed your neck, bitting the shell of your ear to hear you giggle while he makes you moan deliciously.

He came first as expected because you can’t stop moaning behind his ears and making him feel good with your tight walls. He shoots his cum on your stomach, away from your pussy while his other hand is continuously drawing fast circles and making you cum in no time.

You shivered like crazy and tried closing your legs but Haechan got a hold of it and overstimulated you.

“Wild-brutal, that’s you” you said while you continue to shiver, curl yourself in a ball and beg him to stop.

He kisses your body, avoiding his cum but still managed to suck your nipples good as you come down from your high. When you’re finally calm, you reached for the tissue on the coffee table to wipe yourself clean but he snatched the tissue from your hand and did it himself. After that, you moved your body and make room on the small couch so he can lie beside you, using his arms as your pillow, keeping you close to his sweaty body.

“You’re the second girl I kept in my arms tonight,” he says softly. Looking into your eyes directly. You know that it's his sister and it made you smile and planted a kiss on his lips.

“Can you keep it that way then?” you said, softly like how he spoke. He nods and tightens his hug.

“To be honest I feel like I’m a slut right now because I slept with you first... on my first day of school, my first day of meeting you-“

“Sssh. You think too much. You’re not a slut. I like you, you like me. It’s a normal reaction” he kisses your lips and your cheeks one too many times to make you giggle and eventually let go of your thoughts. “I have to go back to my friends” he added.

“What- No, stay, please. My parents wouldn’t mind” you begged but he shook his head and got up from his comfort.

“I’ll find you again”

“Well give me your phone” you said, eager to make him stay. Eager to stay in his life.

“I don’t have one because I can’t afford one” Haechan was shy to tell you the truth but he didn’t want to lie to you. But of course, you understand him instead of prying. You sat up, kissed him sweetly and told him,

“It’s fine. You know where I live, so we're going to do this old school then” you giggle and make the most of the few minutes you have with him. He reached for your panties and helped you wear them together with your shirt, leaving a soft kiss on your lower abdomen.

“Is that fine? Going old school?” He asks smiling and asking for another kiss.

“More than fine, that means I get to see you always” he giggled and told you that’s right and continued wearing the rest of his clothes.

The next day, Haechan woke up with a smile on his face by just merely thinking about you and thinking of going to your house tonight and surprise you after he hangs out with Jeno at the amusement park.

As his day went on with his best friend, all he thinks about is you. Did you eat already, how was your sleep, do you think of him, and what are you doing now? These are questions that he wanted to ask you because he misses you already, but also, these are the questions that attracted the universe into putting you both in the same place.

Just a few minutes ago, Haechan is thinking about you but now you’re right in front of him... with a blindfold at The Kissing Booth and about to kiss Jeno.... Jeno of all people.

There, Haechan stood and watch you and Jeno kiss in front of the audience. Watching your friends take a video and giggle as much as they want because you have no idea who you’re kissing right now. Oh they would kill to be in your position and taste Jeno’s lips. While you... you think about the gentleman who made you laugh over and over again last night, the gentleman who’s honest about everything, and the gentleman who made you feel good on your family couch last night.

And when you removed your blindfold, you can’t help but feel disappointed. It’s not Haechan you’re kissing, he hasn’t found you again.

When Jeno came closer and attempted to kiss you again, you pushed him away in front of many people, smiled and whispered, “We had our fun already, I think that’s enough. Sorry, I was hoping you’d be someone else” and came down from the stage to join your friends.

The disappointment in Jeno’s face was evident. He felt like he violated you or something and wanted to apologize further but you didn’t give him a chance. He saw Haechan standing in the corner with a soda in his hand and joined him, “That was something. I feel like I was taken to another dimension while I was kissing her. Damn I like her already” Jeno admits, having no clue that Haechan knows exactly what he’s talking about.

“Hey.... Haechan” you taped his shoulder which made him and Jeno turn around. You didn’t want to be bold and flirty with him in front of his friend so you just said hey.

Jeno was shocked to the core when you approached his friend and not him, and he was even more shocked to see you smile so sweetly at Haechan. “You know each other?” he asks you both nervously.

“Yes”

“No”

“N-no. Not really. Dude, everyone knows her. New girl in town plus she came by the store during my shift yesterday after school” Haechan explains. Completely denying that you two shared something special the other night.

Good thing Jeno believed and accepted Haechan’s explanation, so this time he didn’t waste any more time and shoot his shot. “I want to apologize to you. Can we go for a walk? Alone together-“

“Good idea man. I think I should go. I have a shift at the store, s-see you at school. B-both of you,” he says and awkwardly walks out and left you with Jeno.

You wanted to follow him, you would rather want to watch him work at the store than be with Jeno and waste your time strolling around the park, you’ve been wanting to be with him ever since you opened your eyes this morning and now you can’t believe that he denied you in front of his friend.

The whole time he was walking in circles around his neighborhood, Haechan can’t stop thinking about you and Jeno. Even hating the universe more for making him and Jeno like the same girl. Fuck, he murmured frustratingly until he came to a thought that maybe life brought you to Haechan’s life so he could finally give something back to his best friend.

Maybe he’s doing the right thing by letting you and Jeno get to know each other.

“You’re a fool,” his sister teases him while he watches her brush her teeth. Haechan just snorted and let out a small laugh knowing that his little sister is smart and that she’s growing up wise.

“But when you grow old you can’t just commit to something or someone if you know to yourself that you can’t. Be honest,” he kisses her sister good night and tucked her to bed. Wishing for her sister to grow up strong and smart, and not like him.

///

After a few weeks of seeing Jeno and going out on dates with him, you force yourself to think that what happened between you and Haechan is just a one time thing. That you were just horny teenagers that night who both had a bad day that’s why you thought it was something special.

It’s not that you’re using Jeno to forget Haechan, but Jeno is the one making his moves and trying so hard to impress you. He’s almost as nice as Haechan you thought. Maybe that’s why they’re best friends, and maybe that’s why now you look forward to seeing Jeno every day because you see Haechan in him.

Until one night, you and Jeno had a rather hot night that leads you two to his bed. Sex with Jeno is rough and fast and to be honest you forgot how many condoms he used because the sex was that good. And in that very moment, you realized that the only difference between Jeno and Haechan is the way they fuck. Jeno made you forget Haechan whenever you two are in bed and that made you want Jeno to fuck you more each day.

But Jeno is a natural sweetheart, a lover boy who shows you that he is a great man and a good person. “I know we fuck too much and it's obvious that something is bothering you” he says, hugging you closely while you’re on top of him after a very good car sex. “You can tell me, you know?” he added but you just shook your head no. “Okay okay, I understand. I love you. Whatever you’re going through or whatever that’s bothering you, continue to lean on me. Use me if you must,”

And right then and there, you decided to return the love Jeno is giving you.

It was not easy but it was worth it. Jeno loved you so much, more than you could ever imagine. You spend your senior year together, made memories each day, have good sex after school or during weekends, be the life of the party together, and meet each other’s family.

“Are you happy with me?” he whispers behind your ear while he hugs you from behind.

“What kind of question is that?” you said, turning around to meet his eyes and rake his hair away from his face. Not giving a fuck about the people watching you two flirt in the middle of a crowded place with drunk teenagers.

“Just a question. My way of checking if I’m still a good boyfriend” he admitted shyly. You rolled your eyes and came closer to him, planting a soft kiss on his lips which soon became heated and his hands roamed freely around your body.

“Mhmm. I'm happy, I love you” you whisper and you mean it.

“I love you too” he smiles and continues the kiss.

And while you two are in your own private world minding your business, Haechan watches from afar with a beer in his hand. Jealous, but not mad. Happy, but for you and his best friend. You deserve each other, he thought.

So as you and Jeno make your relationship strong and pour all your love on each other, Haechan became even more hardworking, focused more on his studies, and looking for more jobs to save more money. It was his way of forgetting you.

During a party that Jeno threw in his house, everything was intensely wild and everyone got drunk during the party, except Haechan because he was late due to his shift from one of his part-time job.

He saw you laughing with your friends near the poolside. You look beautiful tonight, as always. And at the same time, you look drunk already and all he wanted to do is take care of you but that’s not his job.

“Great that you’re here man, ugh. I’m so drunk” Jeno whines, almost about to throw but he’s still in control. “Here. Promised her dad I’d bring her home, but obviously, I can’t now. I can’t drive while I’m like this, knowing that she’s in the car with me. Too risky. Please dude, thank you”

And just like that, the responsibility and the power to take care of you is passed unto him.

“Baby, Haechan will bring you home- I can’t drive” Jeno admitted to you. Giving you his jacket before he walks you towards his car.

“W-what? Let me stay then, I’ll take care of you. Then you can drive me home when you’re sober” you said but your boyfriend said no and told you you’re as drunk as him. So you didn’t have a choice but to go inside the car with Haechan. He watched you two kiss goodbye and say your I love yous with each other before he drives away and takes you home.

The drive was silent. You didn’t dare to open your mouth and ask how he’s been, he didn’t dare to open his mouth and tell you that you’re beautiful. And it stayed like this until he reaches your house and parked in front of it.

“Do you remember the night that you walked me home?” you started, and you think it’s the alcohol that's talking. Haechan just nods and lets out a heavy sigh. “I wish it never happened. I wish I didn’t flirt back then and went back inside that bar instead of asking you to take me somewhere quiet” you admitted, feeling your heart break but you can finally breathe better now that you told him what you really feel. But deep inside you didn’t mean it. You’re just saying that because you’re still mad at him for denying you.

He unbuckles his seatbelt and reached for you, shamelessly hugging you, and placed a sweet kiss on your temple. You feel his tears and that made you hug him back. Staining his shirt with your tears that you kept for months.

“I’m sorry. I can’t give you what Jeno can give you. My life is a mess, I’m a trash and you deserve someone better. Someone who can take care of you, I can’t” he hugged you a little bit tighter to let you know that he’s sincere. And after a few minutes of silence, he explained his part to you and you listened attentively not because he owes you an explanation but because you miss his voice.

“When I was new here, bullies just won't stop teasing me, then Jeno became my friend and suddenly they all stopped. Jeno didn’t mind if I’m poor, he just wanted a brother and found it in me. That’s why whenever I’m in need he’s always to the rescue, my books, my mother’s job, this Rolex watch that I only use whenever I need it at work. I remember he gave this to me because he didn’t want to give me cash because he was afraid that will make me feel small. So instead he gave me this watch and expected me to pawn it. But I can’t because it’s like a token of our friendship”

“I get it. Bro code” you said calmly and watch him nod. “But who are you to tell me who to love. My heart still belongs to you when Jeno was courting me, I think about you when he kisses me-“

“Do you still feel the same way?” he blurted out, looking at your lips and thinking of kissing it one last time before you have your closure. But he won't.

“I love Jeno but you still have this great effect on me, you still have my heart” you admitted.

“I’m sure you understand me now. Why I don’t want to hurt my friend” you nod because you do understand him, you don’t want to hurt your boyfriend either, “He’s an angel” Haechan added.

When Haechan left and drove away, you feel like he took your heart away with him. Like that one specific night you had sex with him and you didn’t want him to go. You know what you said. You don’t want to hurt Jeno and you do love him, but what can you do? Your heart still belongs to Haechan.

After that understanding with Haechan, you suddenly became cold towards Jeno and all you could think about is Haechan. Obviously, Jeno can see right through you. He knows you, whenever something troubles you, you will keep it to yourself and you won’t tell it to him. So he made a way to cheer you up, but it ended up annoying you.

He invited you to his house to have a sleepover and movie night with him. The thing is, Jeno knew you love having sex with him so the moment you two are alone in his room with all the lights off and only his big flat-screen TV is on, he tried putting you in the mood and became way too touchy.

“Stop” you whine as Jeno starts kissing your neck while his hands roam free around your body. It feels good you can’t lie, but you’re not in the mood so you pushed him a little too hard which made him even more frustrated.

“What did I do wrong? I wish you could open up to me more, Y/n” he gets up from his bed and gave you space. “You’ve been like that for days and days already, I don’t know if I did something wrong. Baby, just tell me. I’ll fix it,”

And there it is. Your very reason why you loved him “Why do you have to be so nice?” you murmur and sat beside him. You knew that this isn’t the right time to tell him about Haechan, but he asked what's bothering you so you’re going to tell him the truth and do the right thing. Bravely, you told him every inch of your feelings, the truth about you and Haechan, and hopes that he will not get mad at you or his friend.

He listened. While Holding your hand. Close to tears but he won’t cry in front of you. Not yet. But now that he knows the truth about you and his best friend, he felt like he stole you from him.

“Don’t be mad at him, he just feels obligated to give back to all the kindness you have done to him and his family” you wait for his reaction. You expect him to get mad or throw a fit but all he did was kiss your knuckles, hold them tightly, and kept you close while he can.

“So what now? Do you need time? Space even? It hurts like hell, I must admit but I can’t force you to stay” he says, with tears in his eyes and trying so hard to look strong.

“I need space from the both of you, choosing is not easy. I don’t want to hurt you in the future Jeno” you said.

“I can’t force you to stay, but I can beg right? I love you-“ He cups your face and leaves too many kisses on your lips, saying he loves you over and over again, begging you to please choose him.

“I’m sorry Jeno, please don’t beg. You don’t deserve this,” you made him stop begging and pull him into a tight hug. Inviting him to come to bed with you and savor this night together while you can because, on the next day, you will leave him.  

///

When you broke up with Jeno and focused all your energy on school, you walk almost every day from school to your house just so you can sort out your thoughts.

Jeno stopped begging you to come back after a few months and got himself a new girlfriend while Haechan… well, he’s doing his best with avoiding you. Still, breaking up with Jeno is a wise decision because now it’s clear that you don’t love him like how you love and long for Haechan.

“Fuck” you curse at the rain for pouring out of nowhere and you have no choice but to enter the store that Haechan is looking after. Just like the rain, you came out of nowhere and shock him. But shocking him and ruining his peace was not your intention, you’re just waiting for the rain to stop so you can go and walk again.

Shivering because of the store’s air conditioning, you hug yourself to keep yourself warm in every way you can but it’s not enough. You tried going out again but the rain kept pouring and it started to rain hard again when you tried and open the door. But then you heard the sound of the air conditioning being turned off, and Haechan is behind you holding the remote and some extra clothes.

“You’ll get sick if you stay wet. Here-“ he awkwardly hands you an extra shirt and his hoodie, “You can change back there. There’s no one else in this store except me,” he says and points at the door for the staff room. Of course you accepted his offer and you’re happy that he still cares.

When you got back, you saw him preparing you a hot drink and made you sit on one of the vacant chairs. “How are you?” he asks, stirring the drink and puts it in front of you carefully.

“I’ve been well, thank you for asking. How about you? How's your sister?”

“I’m doing good too. And my sister is fine”

And after that, an awkward silence made you both giggle and feel shy about being alone in this cold store. But not for long. Haechan initiated the conversation and made small talk with you. If he’s being honest right now, he doesn’t want you to shut up. He wanted you to talk and talk freely without being shy… like that first night you spend together.

When the rain stopped, he walked you home again and you both enjoyed the cool breeze and wet street. Admiring the calmness that the rain brought. “Why did you avoid me? After me and Jeno broke up?” you asked calmly.

“I know we learned the hard way and we’ve been through some stuff” he came closer and put strands of your hair behind your ear, “I’ve been helping myself to be better for you so this time I won’t fuck us up, and I wasn’t avoiding you. I’m giving you time to heal” he smiles and looked into your eyes deeply.

“Can we start again?” he finally blurted out. “This is my final attempt on keeping you, and… I just want to fight for you this time”

The rain was a blessing after all. You don’t know if the rain was a sign of starting over again but you’re glad that you decided to walk today and got soaked in the rain and did not have a choice but to enter that convenience store. But you’re happy that the rain brought you back together, so you hugged him tightly as your answer and warned him with all your might.

“If I wake up tomorrow and you deny me again, I swear Lee Haechan-“

And just like that, he cuts you off with a kiss, an act of promise so you won’t need to worry for the next day. “My sister will kill me if I let go of you again” he giggles and continue kissing you.

Who would have thought that you need only the rain for you and Haechan to get back together? Because after that night, he kept his promise to you. He never left your side and you never left his. Life wasn’t easy for him still, but you made sure you stayed with him through thick and thin.

Even though Haechan can’t bring you to expensive dates or movie dates, being with him while he’s working at the convenience store is more than enough for you. “I love my job. I can earn money while having a study date with you in this cold store” he says, kissing your temple while you’re busy reading and studying beside him.

Your remaining high school days were full of him and you wouldn’t trade it for anything.

After graduation, you and Haechan planned on living together even though you’re both going to different schools, thankfully your schools aren’t that far from each other. Living together is not easy, your parents warned you. But Haechan made it easy for you because he loves you so much. Nonetheless, you would still choose a hard life with and just so you could be together the moment you open your eyes in the morning until you close them to end your day at night.

“It's you and me from now on, Y/n” he whispers beside your ear, hugging you from behind so tightly like you’re going somewhere and finally kiss you good night.

MAIN MASTERLIST FAQ / WIPS / CALENDAR ABOUT B

To this blog’s audience, please do not steal my works save yourself from the shame. Do not translate my works, they’re not worthy. Also if you see someone who stole my work, kindly reach out to me.

[storytellerofuntoldlegends]

an icarus and his sun: chapter 8

A/N: hello i have returned!! this chapter was weirdly difficult for me to write, but from here on out i think the writing will go much smoother! but unfortunately i do have classes to be worrying about soon, so who knows how much time i will have to write. but still!! very excited about this fic and how you guys will react to upcoming events >:) (plus i added some implied nature wives (katherine and shelby) to this bit so this fic is basically turning into me making empires smp gayer) also check out this stunning art of chapter 5 by @artanogon! and if you wanna make art of this fic, you absolutely can, just be sure to tag me so i can see it!

Warnings: depression of the heartbreak variety, past violence

AO3 Link - Tumblr Masterpost

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Jimmy was trying his hardest to not be mopey as he helped Katherine with rebuilding. He knew that he had promised that he would help her- but his own confusing feelings about Scott, his lack of building know-how, and the dejected look Katherine had as she looked at the slight crater where her castle used to be had Jimmy feeling far out of his league. But he put on a brave face- he needed the distraction, after all.

They began with filling in the crater, mostly silent as they moved dirt over with their shovels. Then once the ground was level, they could begin with setting up the framework of the castle. They spoke more to each other then- but it was mostly Katherine telling Jimmy where to put the support beams. Jimmy wanted to say something, anything to break the tension and melancholy air- but he couldn’t think of a single thing to say to Katherine that didn’t lead back to the tragedies they had experienced. Jimmy wished that Joel or Lizzie were there- but they were off gathering more materials for Katherine’s castle, and probably wouldn’t return until nightfall. So until then, it was just Jimmy and Katherine, silently stewing in their respective sadnesses.

Luckily- or maybe unluckily- someone much more chipper than either of them came along. Jimmy almost didn’t recognize her at first- but quickly realized that the figure approaching them was the mushroom gnome queen, Shrub. Or Shelby-she had said they could call her that too. She was dressed far more casually than she had been at the ball, a polka-dotted red kerchief tied over her head, brown overalls over a green shirt, and red boots with white polka dots. She had a bag slung over her shoulder, and Jimmy could see the tops of mushrooms peeking out of it.

“Um- hello! I- I wanted to offer some gifts from the Undergrove, maybe they could help with rebuilding! Or they could just look pretty- or just be a peace offering- or a gift of sympathy for what happened,” Shelby rambled, seeming just as skittish as she had at the ball, but was less afraid and more excited. Katherine set down the beam she was holding, and gave Shelby a small smile.

“The gift is much appreciated, thank you. It was nice of you to stop by- I apologize for the appearance of the Overgrown. Usually it’s prettier here,” Katherine said, looking over her lands for a brief moment before focusing back on Shelby.

“Oh! Well, what I saw of it at the ball, your empire is lovely! I’m sure it will be back to its former glory soon… if you’d like, I can help! I’m good with plants and I’m not a bad builder!” Shelby offered with an encouraging smile. Katherine practically glowed at the praise of her empire, and smiled back.

“I’d love to have your help- it’s just been me and Jimmy working all day, and most of our time was spent filling in the crater. Some extra hands would definitely help things go faster,” Katherine replied, gesturing at the land around her. Shelby beamed back at her, setting down her bag of mushrooms.

“Then I’m more than happy to help! We gnomes are small but mighty, just tell me where to lug these beams around and I’ll do it!” she chirped. Katherine blinked in slight surprise at her eagerness, but looked over to the stack of beams beside them.

“Well, there is one that needs to go across those two over here for the entrance. If you’re as strong as you say, then maybe you can help Jimmy with getting it up there- I’ll set some scaffolding up so you guys can reach it,” Katherine explained, going over to where two beams were upright and doing just that. Jimmy watched her set up the scaffolding for a moment, until he felt a pair of eyes on him. He turned and looked down to Shelby, who quickly looked away once she realized she had been caught staring.

“Is everything okay? You seem jumpy,” he asked, brows furrowed in confusion. Shelby chuckled nervously.

“Oh. Well- you see, gnomes can’t swim. And I’m kind of afraid of the water and water related things because of it. But you and the ocean lady seem like really nice people! So… sorry for being jumpy. It’s a habit,” she admitted sheepishly. Jimmy let out a good-natured laugh.

“I mean you’re right to be spooked by Lizzie, she can be scary when she wants to be- but most of the time she’s very nice! And trust me, there is not a single threatening thing about me,” Jimmy said, tone turning a bit rueful at the end of his statement. Shelby frowned.

“The guy with the goggles and his friend sure seemed to think otherwise, why else would they bother you like that?” she asked. Jimmy blinked in surprise at that.

“You… you think Fwhip and Sausage are afraid of me?” he asked in disbelief.

“Well… not afraid, but definitely threatened. I’ve seen it before, back where I came from. You’re someone who won’t bow to people easily, and people like them don’t like that,” Shelby explained with a shrug. Jimmy considered this for a moment.

“Huh. I guess… I never saw it like that before,” Jimmy said, a small smile coming to his face.

Their conversation was ended by Katherine waving them over, and Jimmy and Shelby picked up one of the beams to carry over to where the scaffolding had been set up. Shelby was surprisingly strong for her stature, and carrying around the beams and placing them where they needed to be was much easier than before she had arrived. It was less quiet with Shelby around too, as she cheerfully asked questions about their empires, as well as sharing some things about her own empire. But then there was one question that caused Jimmy’s blood to freeze in his veins.

“So you said that Joel and Lizzie were getting more building materials, but what about your partner? Is he with them too?” Shelby asked, and for a moment, Jimmy was confused.

“My… what?” he asked.

“The elf guy you were dancing with at the ball! You’re very cute together, by the way,” Shelby continued, completely oblivious to the tension in the air her statement created. However she soon noticed Jimmy’s pained expression, and it was her curious smile changed to a concerned frown.

“We uh. We were never together. And he betrayed us,” Jimmy said stiffly.

“Oh- oh I’m so sorry. You guys had just looked so happy together, I had just assumed- I’m sorry,” Shelby rambled, and Jimmy gave her a weak smile.

“It’s alright. I guess I was kinda happy- but it was never real. Not for him, at least,” Jimmy replied, throat feeling tight. He hadn’t really meant to burden all of his issues onto Shelby, but his mouth was moving a little faster than his brain was at the moment, and he couldn’t hold back his words.

“Well- well then that guy is missing out! You seem great, and he gave you up for what, tactical gain or political advantage or something?! He doesn’t deserve you!” Shelby declared, hands on her hips as she smiled up at Jimmy confidently. If someone he barely knew had so much confidence in him, then why shouldn’t he? Jimmy smiled back at Shelby.

“Maybe you’re right,” he conceded. Shelby gave him a half laugh, half playful scoff.

“Of course I’m right! Now c’mon, this castle isn’t gonna rebuild itself!” she chirped, heading over to the stack of beams. Jimmy could only stare after her for a moment, dumbfounded. Katherine seemed just as amazed by the gnome’s boundless positivity, a smile growing across her face.

“She’s spirited,” Katherine murmured. Jimmy chuckled.

“Yeah, you two are like birds of a feather,” Jimmy murmured back.

"We both are definitely nature-oriented," Katherine added with a chuckle. She looked at Shelby fondly for a moment, until her expression turned into a frown as she noticed something in the sky. Subconsciously her hand started reaching for Jimmy’s, and he took it as he looked up to the sky with her. Two figures were flying in- and the tension in Jimmy’s shoulders relaxed ever-so-slightly when he recognized them as Pearl and Gem. But he still gave Katherine’s hand a gentle squeeze all the same.

“What’s going on? Are we under attack again?!” Shelby asked anxiously, coming over to stand beside them and look up at Pearl and Gem flying in.

“Don’t know yet- they weren’t directly behind the explosion… but they are allied with the people who were,” Katherine said apprehensively. Shelby looked down from the sky, frowning in concern- and upon noticing Jimmy and Katherine’s joined hands, she grabbed Katherine’s other hand with a comforting smile. Katherine flushed slightly, but smiled back at Shelby gratefully.

“Please don’t be alarmed!” Gem shouted as she came in for a landing. Frankly, that didn’t make Jimmy feel any less alarmed.

“We aren’t allied with Fwhip and Sausage anymore. We don’t want any part of what they’re up to,” Pearl clarified, landing beside Gem.

“Really?” Jimmy asked warily. Gem looked to Jimmy with an open, pleading expression.

“I meant what I said when we told you that we didn’t know what Fwhip was up to. He left myself and Pearl completely in the dark, while Sausage and Scott were the only ones who knew about the full plan. But even then, I don’t think those two had the full picture, they looked surprised that we hadn’t known about the TNT. The point is- Pearl and I were tired of being part of an alliance that lied to us, and lied to us to hurt others! Katherine- if I had known what was going to happen, I would have never gone along with it and would have tried to put a stop to it,” Gem explained, turning her focus to Katherine as she spoke.

“So… you two are… on our side then?” Katherine asked slowly. Pearl gave her a gentle smile.

“If you’ll have us, yes. We also figured you could use our help rebuilding,” Pearl replied. Katherine looked to Jimmy, as if she was asking for his opinion. Jimmy blinked, and looked at Pearl and Gem. They seemed… candid, at least. But after Scott… Jimmy wasn’t sure who he could trust anymore besides his steady allies. However, they weren’t Scott. And furthermore, it really wasn’t his call to make. It was Katherine’s.

“It’s your empire, Katherine. If you don’t want them here, then just say the word. But you won’t get a fight from me if you do want them to help,” Jimmy said gently. Katherine smiled, and looked back to Pearl and Gem.

“I would absolutely appreciate your help. We’ve almost got all the framework for the castle set up- but having someone with wings help us out with some of the taller parts would be lovely,” Katherine said. Pearl beamed, and Gem clapped her hands excitedly. Gem came closer and Katherine let go of Shelby and Jimmy’s hands to talk over building plans with Gem, Shelby following after her and listening as well. Pearl, however, walked over to Jimmy with a mildly timid expression.

“Pearl?” Jimmy asked.

“There’s something I think you should know,” she blurted. Jimmy blinked in surprise, tilting his head to one side in confusion.

“I… okay,” Jimmy said semi-apprehensively. Pearl took a deep breath, like she was unsure of how to continue.

“Gem and I just came from a meeting with the Wither Rose Alliance. Well… it wasn’t much of a meeting, Gem and I broke off ties with the alliance pretty quickly and then left. But… there’s a… there’s something about Scott,” Pearl explained slowly. Jimmy tensed, swallowing nervously.

“Oh?” Jimmy asked, trying to keep his tone neutral.

“Like I said, Gem and I didn’t stay long so I don’t know for sure- but there was something off about Scott. He just… didn’t seem himself. I think he was just as unhappy with Fwhip as we were with him. I… I just know he meant a lot to you. And I think you meant a lot to him too. I just… I don’t want to get your hopes up, but maybe… maybe you should give him a chance,” Pearl continued. Jimmy’s mouth fixed into a firm line.

“It’s a nice thought… but I don’t think I can trust him anymore. Not after everything that happened,” Jimmy said, throat tight as he tried not to cry. Part of him really wanted to hope that maybe there was some sort of misunderstanding, that Scott really did care about him- but Jimmy couldn’t afford that kind of hope. Pearl nodded in understanding.

“That’s fair. Like I said… just thought you should know,” she said, before walking over to join Katherine in her discussion for the build. Then Jimmy- only feeling ever so slightly useless now that Katherine had so much more help- swallowed the tears that thinking about Scott caused, and joined them.

-

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[xwing-baby]

I Don’t Trust You (Din Djarin x gn!Reader)

for @propertyofdindjarin​ - sorry its so late but i hope you enjoy this!!

Characters: Din Djarin x gn!reader (i dont think i used any gendered language in this but let me know if i did and ill change the tag)

Word Count: 8k (this really ran away with me lol)

Warnings: enemies to lovers, description of injury, canon level violence, little steamy (kissing, insinuated smut), threat of death, like one swear word, pre show! Din

Summary: The Mandalorian killed you two years ago, yet here you are alive and well on a different planet. The Mandalorian is called in to help you and your team of royal guards find a missing princess. Things go horribly wrong and you are left to journey home with your worst enemy...

A/N: shout out to the random radio 4 play that gave me the idea for the plot of this and to @propertyofdindjarin for the request for enemies to lovers! i’ve never done this trope before and im not sure if i really did it justice but i enjoyed writing it at least hahah i hope you like it too darling and thanks for requesting! 

--

“The Master is calling in reinforcements from a bounty hunter for this mission,” The general in charge of your squad spoke as the team dressed.

“Who?”

“A Mandalorian,” The general answered.

“We don’t need a Mandalorian,” You spoke up bitterly, looking up as you finally pulled your boots on. The general sighed, used to your defiance and vocal hatred of The Mandalorian. He rolled his eyes at your attitude.

“We need all the help we can get on this,”

“I don’t need a Mandalorian,” You corrected yourself.

“I don’t care about your opinion. My word is final. And besides, there is nothing you can do he is arriving… now,”

A knock at the door turned everyone’s heads. The general nodded and it was opened to reveal the shining armour of the Mandalorian. You scowled as you watched the Mandalorian swan into the room, newly polished armour glinting in the light. You frowned and turned your attention away from him, just the sight of him made you exasperated.

You didn’t understand why The Master would want to bring him in, he was expensive and more importantly an asshole. All the hard work you and your team would put in on this mission would undoubtedly be overshadowed by him. He would be praised no end and paid a handsome fee while you would probably be berated for not meeting his standard and not get any reward for returning the princess.

It was the second attempt to get the Master’s daughter back from her kidnappers. The first time had been a complete failure and caused the gang to go into deeper hiding. It had taken weeks to locate her new location, there was no room for error this time. The princess had to be returned.

The Mandalorian had noticed you the moment he entered the room. He was surprised to see you alive at all, he’d assumed you were dead, having killed you two years prior. But here you were in a brand new system, alive and well. He didn’t say a word on the matter, he’d been paid for your bounty already, it wasn’t his fault you had miraculously survived.

You sat in silence, glaring at the Mandalorian across the room, while the General spoke about the plan for the mission. You grumbled and rolled your eyes when he made suggestions. The nerve of him. Coming here invited and not trusting your plan. The grumble earned you a sharp elbow in the ribs and a hiss to shut up.

With the plan set, you began the long trip out to the location. It was far, a days trip by speeder at least. Across plains, over mountains, through valleys and finally to the destination. A small building atop a large hill. It was strangely open, considering how long it had taken to find. The sun was going down by the time you arrived. You were apprehensive to approach so quickly, wanting to wait out but you had no power amongst this group, especially with the Mandalorian validating the plan there was no way you’d win. The group dismounted the speeders mere feet from the entrance, loaded their guns and went inside, barely stopping for a second once their feet touched the ground.

You however did not follow. Ordered to stay outside, they didn’t trust you. You were to keep watch, not that there was anything to watch for. Two years on the planet and you were still considered an outsider. Your reputation had not preceded you but it quickly caught up. Within two weeks of your arrival, whispers of your real name had floated across the galaxy until it landed into the mouth of the Master. You were allowed to stay, only if you joined the royal guard to put your skills to use.

The royal guard didn’t trust you, used you as a scapegoat on any occasion and sent you in many suicide missions purely because you were expendable. But as even the Mandalorian knew, you were very hard to kill. You came back every single time with nothing more than a scratch. Instead of your action gaining their trust it bred jealousy and mistrust.

You scuffed around the site, listening out for signs that the mission was complete or anyone was in trouble. The moon rose slowly into the sky, stars appeared with it giving you some entertainment as you tried to spot the constellations familiar to you. A twinge of anxiety cut your stomach, they should have been out long ago. You should have followed to help

Suddenly, a bone-breaking thunderous sound erupted from below and the ground began to shake. You were frozen to the spot until your spot began to fall away. The ground beneath you shook and collapsed inwards. You scrambled out the way, moving to where the ground was stable again. The building your squad had gone inside had collapsed, screams and cries of terror could be heard from inside. The building fell, then fell further. All you could do was watch in horror as where the building once stood, a crater appeared. Dust plumed from the wreck, filling your lungs and scratching your eyes. You coughed and spluttered, shielding your face from it.

Soon the dust settled and things became clearer. The devastation was all that was left. And the Mandalorian. Stood alone on the opposite side of the great crater, he looked down into the hole for a moment, thinking, before making his way around to where you were. He didn’t stop to talk to you as he passed, simply readjusting his vambrace and walking away. Disturbed by his lack of reaction it took you a moment to react, you watched him walk a few paces ahead before running after him.

“Hey!” You called after him, “Where are you going?”

“There’s no speeders. We’ll have to walk,” He said, not stopping.

“They’ll kill us if we return without the princess!” You protested.

“They’ll kill you when you don’t return with the girl,” Mando corrected you, “Unless you want to walk climb in there and search through rubble, the only thing to do is walk back,”

“It’ll take days! There’s no way you’d make it back to the city in one piece,”

“Who said I was going back there?”

“You have to finish the job,”

“The job is finished,”

“You arrogant son of a bitch,” You scoffed as he continued to walk away. He picked up his pace, “I told Illana that we didn’t need you,” You shouted angrily. Din didn’t reply, trying to block out your whinging. “You’re a waste of money, everyone knows Mandalorians don't work well in teams. There’s a reason you all got wiped out,” You snarled. That comment bristled Din. He knew you were only baiting for a fight, angry your squad had died and he wasn’t going to give you what you wanted. It wasn’t advantageous for anyone, “What happened in there? You blow it up to make the job easier? You killed them all,”

Din ignored your questioning. He hadn’t killed them, he had barely made it out alive

“She was just a child and you killed her, for what? Tell me!”

He turned when he heard the load up of a blaster behind him. Your blaster, loaded and waiting in your hand was pointed at his back while he walked ahead. He whipped around just as fast, his blaster pointed at you too.

“Really?” He asked.

“Talk,”

“It was a trap,”

“Liar!” You shouted.

“The girl was tied to some kind of trap that blew up the mines below the building. I was not in the room when the extraction happened. I didn’t do anything,” He explained, you didn’t reply, grinding your teeth as you tried to get your head around it. “Why would I kill them? I needed her alive,”

You hated that he was making sense. There was no real logical reason for him to kill the princess. He needed her alive to get his payment just as you did. You glared at him, fingers twitching over your blaster.

“Keep walking,” You said sternly. You turned the safety back on to the blaster though never lowering it. Din lowered his weapon. “I’m not having you anywhere out of my sight. Can’t trust you as far as I could throw you,”

Din huffed in agreement and turned to continue walking. Your blaster wasn’t going to do anything more than scuff his armour, he didn’t worry about you attacking him from behind. If you’d wanted to kill him you would have tried by now. Whatever made this whole ordeal go faster was what he was going to do.

You walked across the grassy plain for hours in total silence. At least outwardly silent. In your mind, you were cursing his name in every language you knew to any deity you could think of. Cursing him, his stupid armour and his stupid helmet. You cursed the planet, you cursed the city, you cursed the entire universe for forcing you to be stuck with the one man you hated most. You wished you had followed the squad and died with them, it would be more pleasant than this. At least with the pace the Mandalorian kept, you were going to be back to the city in record time, this nightmare could end.

Soon the grass gave way to shrubs and weeds, trees that were rare before now crowded around you. You came to a path, well-trodden and open, surprisingly. If it was this clear it was only a good thing, you were on the right path back.

“Stop,” You ordered as the path forked out in two directions. Din had chosen one path already, a few paces ahead. He stopped and turned around to see what the problem was. You were facing the second path, motioning with your blaster to cross over. “There’s a shortcut,” You said, “That forest opens back up in the West of the city. If memory serves me correctly it’ll cut our journey in half,”

“I don’t trust you,�� Din said warily.

“Never said you had to trust me. If you carry on that way it’ll take another three days to walk around a huge lake and a ravine. This way cuts that out and we’ll be back in the city in two days,”

You walked forward into the break of trees, turning back when you didn’t hear him follow. He hadn’t moved, still calculating the decision. “Not scared are you, Mando?” You taunted him. “We don’t have much sunlight. Move,”

For a moment Din contemplated shooting you right there. You were rude and arrogant, nobody would question your death at all if he did it. His hand hovered over his blaster, before finally deciding against it. He needed the payment and with you alive at the end of it he would have proof he didn’t slaughter the entire garrison.

He followed you into the forest, walking in front of you as before. The trees were so dense, a few minutes of walking cut out all light. Spotlights of dusty yellow light broke through the canopy providing enough light inside to see your footing directly in front of you but nothing more. Roots covered the floor, winding around your ankles trying to pull you in so your body could supply nutrients for the plants. Branches caught on the Mandalorian’s shoulders, snapping back into your face often when they released. You learnt quickly to keep a few more paces back to stop the attacks.

You had heard stories about these forests. Fables told to the children in the city warning them of the dangers of the expansive green land. Most of them you knew to be just stories, but like most legends in the universe, there was truth to some. That knowledge kept you alert as you continued the walk.

Suddenly, the Mandalorian stopped in his tracks. You nearly crashed into him, not looking where you were going you were met with metal.

“Keep walking,” You ordered. He didn’t move, turning his head to look up at the canopy. You frowned, growing impatient. “What?”

“Quiet,” He hissed. You paused as you heard another shuffle you had thought to be Din moving. It was above you, beside you and behind you. Then you heard it, a shrill echoing cry from above. A cry you had been told to fear since day one on this planet.

They descended from every side. Five or six strong and lean warriors armed with metal spears and knives swarmed you and Din before you even had time to run.

A flurry of metal and blaster bolts occurred. You were quick on the draw taking two warriors quickly before another knocked your gun from your hands. It was immediately lost to the undergrowth. Dodging one strike then another you grabbed hold of one of the warrior's weapons, forcing it back on them to push them back. Pull, push, slash. A splash of blood as the spear cut into his skin and another dead.

You had one left. Flipping a small knife in his hand, the warrior snarled at you before pouncing. Taking out your own, you threw yourself at the warrior. Each attempted strike on your part was blocked effortlessly. Your advance became a backwards pace as you were slowly overpowered. The knife scraped against your vambrace as you blocked yet another strike creating sparks.

The warrior growled something in a language you didn’t understand as you stepped backwards again, finding yourself cornered to a tree. You growled and surged forward again, catching a slice to his cheek and shoulder before being pinned to the bark.

You cried out as a sharp bite pierced your skin, the warrior slipping past your armour and plunging their blade into your side as your hands came up and used your knife to slice their throat. A spray of blood hit your face as they fell to the ground. You fell backwards leaning against the tree for support as your head went light, you watched Din take out the remaining warriors. One on their spear, another with his blaster. He was surrounded by bodies but looked like he’d barely broken a sweat. He surveyed his area before finally noticing you. The ambush had happened so fast he barely had time to spare a glance in your direction to see how you were.

You grimaced as he walked over. He didn’t come close, not helping you, just watching. He saw the leather strapped blade on the ground beside you and the body next to you. You hissed as you tried to push yourself up, even minimal effort was aggravating the wound.

Your hand let go of the injury, revealing the blood to Din. You wiped it on your pant leg, laughing dryly as you looked up at him. You could barely see him, eyes hazy, even speaking was an effort as your throat was stinging with the threat of vomit. Din lurched forward holding out his hand. “I don’t need your help,” You garbled, trying again. This time you were successful, only for a moment as your world spinning and went black for a moment., “Stars above,” you gasped, falling forward into the Mandalorian. He caught you quickly before you fell to the floor.

“Where are you hurt?” He asked urgently.

“Under there,” You slurred, waving your arm weakly at your side. Your eyes were dropping, skin pale. It was the end, killed by a forest warrior’s blade with the Mandalorian by your side. Not how you wanted to go.

--

You came too in the dark. You startled, immediately on guard. The sudden movement made you cry out as pain overtook your body.

“Don’t move,” Came a gruff reply. It was the Mandalorian. Ignoring his request, you slowly pushed yourself to sit up, wincing at the pain but you couldn’t just lay there.

You then realised your armour was gone, top feeling practically bare in your undershirt. A bandage was wrapped around your ribs, soaked in blood. He had saved you.

You looked at him across the fire, confused. You had expected him to leave you for dead. You certainly should have died. Either the gods were playing a horrific joke on you by drawing out this quest with your supposed enemy or he had cared for you. You wondered how long you’d been out for. Could have been a few hours, a few days. You doubted he would care for you for that long but evidently, the bounty hunter was full of surprises.

“You should have left me,” you finally spoke. Your voice was coarse and you coughed to clear your throat. “Why’d you do that?”

He shrugged. You frowned but decided not to press the matter. You preferred living over being dead.

“How long was I out?” You asked.

“A few hours,” He replied, “Nice to have you quiet for so long,”

“Where’s my armour?”

“Here,” He said, patting the pile of metal next to him. You watched him carefully now. You needed that back if you were going to make it and didn’t entirely trust he would give it back. Parts were beskar. You knew he would try and stake a claim to it despite the fact he knew where you’d gotten it from. He’d tried it before and that had ended with you at the bottom of a rocky gorge, “I’ll give it back in the morning. You need to rest and you can’t in that,”

“It’s very important to me,” You stated.

“I know,” He said.

“How do I know you won’t take it?”

“You’ll have to trust me,” Din said. You were not about to do that. You pushed yourself to stand up, grinding your teeth to not let out the sharp pain that was splitting through your side, “Sit down,” Din ordered.

“Give me-,” As you stood up your vision went blurry, you stumbled forward into the fire pit. Luckily the Mandalorian had quick reflexes and caught you before you fell into the flames

“I didn’t save your life for you to fall into a fire,” he scolded you, helping you back to the ground. Sit,”

You shoved his hands off you and shuffled away from him. “I’ll kill you if you take it,” you grumbled.

“You would try,” Din agreed. Both of you knew you would not be a threat. While the Mandalorian had managed to flush out most of the poison some of it remained in your system. Not deadly in dosage but enough to weaken you significantly. You wouldn’t be able to get real help until you returned to the city.

Silence fell over the camp again. You stared into the fire, watching it spit and spark. A physical manifestation of your rage and embarrassment. Not only were you weak and wounded, but you were also stuck with the one person you swore would get revenge on if you ever crossed paths again. Now the only revenge you could manage was maybe to scratch his armour. You had slaughtered people, entire towns had met their end through your hands. Now your life lay in the Mandalorians’s. You hated it.

You glared at him for what felt like hours. Neither of you was going to give in to sleep, too suspicious of the other to succumb to the vulnerability. The three moons travelled slowly overhead, animals scratching around the clearing of the forest none would dare to venture into the foreign light of the Mandalorian’s fire but you could feel a thousand eyes in the darkness watching you intently.

Suddenly he stood up. Suspicious you watched him walk the short distance to you. Without warning, he passed a silver packet of food to you and walked behind you. You looked dumbly at the packet and turned your head to see what he was doing. You had barely looked over your shoulder before his gloved hand came to the side of your face, pushing you away.

“Turn around and I’ll kill you,” Din warned you.

“Ok! Kriff, calm down I don’t want to look anyway,” You scoffed at him. Somehow, his insistence that you didn’t see his face only made the idea more enticing. You heard a scuff of metal and the sound of something heavy on the grass, his helmet was off.

You kept your head straight forward, moving only to look at what you were eating. It was very similar to eating next to a wild animal, any movement you made while he ate could be your last. You knew enough about Mandalorians to know it wasn’t him being territorial but to do with his ‘creed’. They could never remove their helmets, never show their faces to anyone except family. It didn’t seem like the Mandalorian behind you had any family, there was barely a caring bone in his body. Except he had saved your life, though that was more an act of self-preservation than anything else you thought.

Din wouldn’t usually risk eating like this with someone like you nearby. There was no privacy, no guarantee you wouldn’t turn and catch him but his hunger was overtaking his logic. It had been days since he’d eaten, he was the lowest on credits in his life the small amount he’d earn from this bounty was desperately needed. If he was going to be paid at all now.

He ate quickly, wolfing down the scraps he had found in your pack. It was bland and chalky but it was food, nutrients, and that was all that mattered. He had to survive until the next. Once he finished, he picked up his helmet and placed it back on his head. Safe inside his metal shell he stood up and walked to his previous spot on the other side of the fire.

He watched you while you ate. He took in the way your skin glowed in the firelight. Wisps of unruly hair caught the light giving you a halo over your head except there was nothing angelic about you. You knew murder and destruction just as well as he did. You’d killed many and cursed more to the haunting image of your destruction. You were one of a small few in the galaxy who had survived the Mandalorian.

There was something oddly satisfying at the fact you couldn’t get away now. You couldn’t do anything if he tried to kill you again now. All your power, all your strength, was in his hands. It was a dark feeling he wanted to avoid, he didn’t think about it too much. If he’d wanted to kill you he would have left you to die.

Once you finished your food you threw the packaging into the fire and settled back. You watched the Mandalorian pick through your pack, pulling out whatever he could find useful for the rest of the travel. You knew we wouldn't find much, the thing had only been packed for a two-day trip maximum. You ached from head to toe, tired and more hungry than the nutrients bar could stave off you longed for your bed. Soft and warm it was the only good thing in this place, the only thing that had kept you here for so long. Comfort was never something you had been given freely, you were going to hold onto this one for as long as you could.

Soon you couldn’t fight sleep any longer. You lay down next to the fire, watching the Mandalorian until you could no longer keep your eyes open.

—

The next day something had shifted in your dynamic. The fact he’d saved your life had changed things. You weren’t so angry at him. He was careful with you, helping you up from the ground and you didn’t miss the way his helmet stayed on you for longer than needed as you pulled your armour back on. He’d cleaned it too, wiping off the blood and dirt from the metal.

You walked mostly in silence, Din still in front of you. You may not hate him anymore but you didn’t entirely trust him yet. He was on neutral ground as far as you were concerned. He'd tried to kill you once, he’d saved you once, They cancelled each other out and now all was left as to gain any opinion either way about who this man was. Was he a killer or was he kind? His actions thus far, surprisingly, offered the latter. Despite that, your hand never left your blaster, though not drawn it was ready in its holster if he decided to turn on you.

Every time you hissed or groaned as you walked, he would stop, look at you and check you were okay before continuing. If it wasn’t for the cold nature of his helmet it would have been endearing.

You travelled together through forest and fields, over a small mountain and down a ravine. Your legs ached, back sore from carrying your pack but at least your stab wound had gone numb. Your pain receptors were so fried now your brain was trying to forget it all together so you could survive.

You flagged behind Mando, gritting your teeth and forcing yourself forward until you couldn’t take it anymore. You let out a small cry of defeat before calling for the Mandalorian to stop. You sat on a rock above a reed bed, leaning on it with one arm while the other pried your armour from your body. Din stopped walking as soon as he heard you.

“I need to rest for a bit,” You admitted, struggling with your straps. One-handed it was impossible to get them off but if you didn’t you couldn’t breathe. You pulled and tugged at the buckles until you were stopped by the Mandalorian’s gloved hand on yours.

“I’ll do it,” He said quietly. You moved your hand, turning a little to let him have better access to the buckles holding the metal to your body.

You didn’t say a word, knowing you couldn’t do it by yourself. His skilled fingers worked the buckles open and pulled the chest pieces away from your body. There was care in his touch, his fingers momentarily gracing over your exposed skin for a moment. The light touch sent shivers down your spine. You turned your head for fear of showing just how affected you were by his touch. You sighed in relief when the weight was gone and the strain on your muscles was decreased.

“Thank you,” You mumbled.

“We can set up camp here for the night,”

“It’s not even dark,” You protested, “Give me a few minutes we can keep walking. It’s not safe out in the open like this,”

“You’re in pain,”

“I’ll be in pain wherever we are,” You said, “There are caves just over there, it will be safer to stay there,”

“That’ll be two hours walk,”

“I can do it,”

“I’m tired too. We’re staying here,” He said, “You can bathe in the river, clean the wound again,”

“Mando-,” You protested.

He wasn’t listening anymore. He’d set down the weapons on his back and set to creating a fire. If it was going to be as cold as last night you were going to need one.

You were silently relieved. Your entire body was screaming for a break, the wound throbbing so much you could have thrown up. You needed to rest. You knew you weren’t far from the city now, it was on the other side of the pass, you could see ships land and take off in the distance, specks leaving white trails in the sky. You would be back by the next evening, you predicted. Only one day left free of consequences.

As the decision had been made to stay by the river for the night, you decided you could get out of your armour again. You sat up slowly, leaning to one side to avoid putting pressure on the wound on your side. You piled the pieces up next to the rock.

Din was still busy searching for suitable wood, a good distance away from you you decided it was safe to strip off and explore the water you could hear behind the reed bed. You pulled aside the plants, creating a path for yourself and revealing a beautiful stream. The water was crystal clear, reflecting the sunset colours above you.

You waded into the water, holding up your tunic so it didn’t get wet. The current wasn’t strong, stones were stable under your feet and you let yourself walk further into the river until it got to your hips. Creatures in the water scattered as your legs invaded their home. You pulled your tunic over your head, throwing the fabric back onto the riverbank, then untied the Mandalorians bandages leaving them with the tunic too. The cool water soothed your aching muscles, washing away the sweat and dry blood as it passed over your skin. You groaned at the heavenly feeling before dipping down under the surface, letting the world melt away in the stream.

Din returned to find you missing. He dropped the sticks he’d found and looked around for you. He hadn’t heard a struggle, he’d have seen someone if you’d been taken. He spotted your armour in a pile while you’d been lay, too neat to be stripped of you in a hurry you must have taken it off. None of his weapons missing either. Then he heard your voice from behind the tall reeds surrounding the lazy river, a pained groan. He was quick to action fearing you’d fallen and been hurt again. He barrelled through the reeds, nearly falling down the riverbank into the water until he saw you. Entirely naked, facing away from him, standing waist-deep in the cool water. Every scar, every bruise, every lump and bump was on view under the golden sun instantly transfixing Din.

He didn’t want to stare but he couldn’t bring his eyes away from the view. Drenched in golden light, your wet skin sparkled. His eyes fell slowly down your body, his own body was fighting between leaving you alone and joining you in the water. Your shadow cast on the opposite bank of reeds showed a broken image of everything you had hidden.

“Can you pass me my clothes when you’re done staring please Mando?” You spoke up suddenly, looking over your shoulder with a smirk on your lips. Din startled, snapping himself out of the trance he’d fallen into, nearly falling in the water. He coughed and spluttered, the sound coming out strangely through his vocoder, which made you laugh. He nodded, muttering something you couldn’t hear before disappearing back through the reeds to retrieve your clothes.

You were used to washing with no privacy. Being in the places you’d been, privacy was a luxury. You could ignore the lustful stares men gave but something about Din watching you set you on edge, it excited you. You couldn’t see his face, couldn’t tell where he was looking but his vision bore like laser’s into your skin. You felt electric. He could have watched forever and you wouldn’t mind at all.

You dunked under the cold water, cleaning yourself and cooling off the heat of your body. You found your clothes laid out on the bank, where Din had been standing before. You smiled, dried off and dressed before re-emerging from the reeds.

The sun was going down now, barely a sliver above the horizon. Stars came out, colouring the night sky with constellations. The Mandalorian had a good fire going. A field rat hung over the flames cooking away.

“Sit close to the fire so you can dry off properly,” He said as you approached. You smiled and nodded, feeling brave enough to sit next to him rather than across as you had done the other night. He was opposed to your decision and didn’t move when you settled down next to him in the grass. “The wound looked like it's healing well,” He said after a moment of quiet.

“That’s all you were looking at?” You asked with a smirk.

“I didn’t mean to pry,” He apologised, a little ashamed at his voyeurism.

“I didn’t say I minded,” You smiled, sweet on the surface but the wicked fire in your eyes told him exactly what he wanted. He shivered under your gaze and moved quickly to get away from your scrutiny, turning his attention to stoking the fire again. You laughed to yourself and settled back onto your elbows to watch the stars.

This night was so different from the one before. You didn’t watch him so intently, trusting that he wouldn’t suddenly try to rob you or kill you. You were relaxed, as much as you could in the circumstances. Your earlier question of the character of the Mandalorian was slowly being answered. He was a mixture of good and kind, and cold and calculated. You couldn’t forget how viciously he had attacked you all those years ago, how bloody and raw those warriors had been left in the forest. But simultaneously you couldn’t forget his kindness in saving you, his care for your wellbeing as you walked today. How bashful he became when you confronted him about his peeping. You could hear the embarrassment in his voice. If he was a cold and heartless killer like you thought him to be, he would not take your teasing. He wouldn’t be embarrassed. No, this Mandalorian much like everyone else was complicated. Under that beskar somewhere lay a man, who unfortunately you were starting to like.

You couldn’t hate him. Not when he had found and cooked food for you to share. Din had pulled the field rat off the spit, opened it up and pulled out the cooked meat. He passed you half before collecting his own. You initially curled your lip at the charred remains in your lap but there was no other choice. It was that or starve.

Din opened his mouth to speak, to tell you to stay put as he sat behind you but was astounded at how quickly you’d turned your back on him giving him the privacy he needed. Metal hit the ground with a thud, you stayed perfectly still. Din noticed instantly, his chest becoming heavy as he saw your fear. You had been friendly all day, talking as if you were friends but the way you sat in front of him like caught prey reminded him that wasn’t the case.

You surprised him, it was rare for people to understand so quickly, let alone someone like you. Someone who hated him, had tried to kill him, usually, they’d mock him and refuse unless he threatened them, like he’d done to you last night. You didn’t say a word. You respected him.

So, he ate slower. Taking the time to enjoy his food, as much as you can enjoy slightly burnt field rat. He picked at the meat, pulling it apart with his fingers. His quiet groan of pleasure at the taste of his food made your ears prick and hair stand up on edge. You’d teased him for watching you in the river, but if he sat behind you and made sounds like that you were going to have to do something. Call it Stockholm syndrome, some kind of weird lapse of judgement due to the stress of your predicament but you found yourself liking the Mandalorian. He had tried to kill you before, he should terrify you, but the fact he was such a mystery, and a dangerous one at that, made him all the more enticing.

Din didn’t miss the way you’d pricked up at the noise he’d made. He didn’t mean to, it had just slipped from his lips. A new kind of hunger took over him as he finished his meal. He wanted you. The memory of you in the river cast over him. He wondered how soft your skin would feel, fresh from the mineral waters you’d bathed in. You smelt so fresh from where he was sitting, how much better would it be with his nose in your hair. He’d been hungry for days, but this hunger had gone unsolved for months, he could hardly remember the last time he’d held someone, kissed someone, fucked someone.

Without realising it Din had moved closer to you. His hands ghosted over your hair, wanting desperately to run his fingers through it. He wanted to touch you, to feel you. He leant over, just outside your peripheral vision and placed a kiss on your cheek. It was short, shorter as you startled at the sudden touch. Din retreated quickly, your sudden movement startling him too.

“What was that?” You asked sharply. Din frowned, instantly regretting his action. To his surprise, you didn’t make a move to look at him.

“Wh-what do you mean?” He stuttered, all confidence draining from his body.

“Kiss me properly if you’re going to kiss me,” you said confidently. A simple touch of his lips to your cheek had set you alight, you were startled but didn’t want him to stop.

Din grinned in the dark and surged forward to kiss you properly. The sharp scratch of stubble surprised you as he kissed you. His lips were soft as passion dripped into your mouth as your mouth opened to him in a gasp. The Mandalorian pulled you closer, turning you to face him properly. You hissed in pain when his hand brushed over your wound. He whispered an apology, moving down to your jaw. His nose brushed along your jaw taking in the clean and earthy scent of you.

His kiss travelled down your neck. The burn of his stumble on your soft skin made you sigh and open up to him more. Din could feel himself falling into you, your scent and taste, the noises that you were making just from his kisses were driving him insane. He could stop if he needed but he didn’t want to. He could trust you.

His hands stroked down your arms, taking your wrist into his grip. He continued his assault on your neck as he lifted it. He placed your hand over your eyes, holding your wrist tight to keep it in place. His warm hand over yours was oddly comforting.

“Move your hand and I stop, yes?” He whispered in your ear, his hot breath tickling you and sending a shiver up your spine, “I don’t want to kill you, but I will,”

“I understand,”

--

If there was any way you could have predicted the ending of your adventure with the Mandalorian there would be no way you could have predicted the events of the previous night.

He was good. Surprisingly good. You were a little shocked, having thought he was some celibate mercenary monk type character, but he knew what he was doing. If there weren’t stars above you, he’d made you see more. He was careful not to hurt you but didn’t hold out. Edges of your previous hatred for one another dipped in, adding so much to the event. You woke up sore in a completely different and entirely satisfying way.

You set out for the final stretch of the journey with a smile on your face. Your blaster was left alone in its holster and the Mandalorian walked beside you. You trusted him.

The final stretch was the most challenging. Through a rocky ravine, you had to climb over boulders and through tight passes. If you could have gone over you would, but the hundred-foot sheer cliff faces took that option away from you pretty fast. The Mandalorian walked slower to allow you to keep up, taking hold of your chest armour when the weight became too much to take anymore. You still couldn’t understand the reasoning behind his kindness but accepted it easily. He wouldn’t leave you more than ten foot behind, despite your insistence on leaving you to catch up on your own he refused and waited for you before enforcing a rest stop so you could catch your breath and continue. After hours of walking through the rocky pass, red stone finally gave way to green grass and blue sky once more.

You saw the city gates on the horizon and your heart began to ache. You had almost forgotten what you were walking back to. You had to tell the Master that his daughter was dead, that your entire team was burnt alive and you were the only survivor. You were dead for sure. Being the outsider anyway put you on rocky ground, this would be the final straw.

Din could sense your nervousness. Even if you didn’t express it verbally, he knew you were anxious to return. He thought you were brave for doing so, but you didn’t have a choice. If you ran you could never stay hidden from the Master. You were dead either way, at least if you brought yourself in you could argue your case.

Citizens lined the wall of the city, flags waving and cheering songs danced on the breeze as soon as you and the Mandalorian were spotted. You walked through the outlying villages with heads hung low as the people ran up to you expecting their princess in tow. When they saw the two of you alone their cries of joy turned to silence.

You reached the city gates and it seemed nobody had noticed, bells rang out and drums echoes from inside. Children waved from the wall, happy and excited to see you. The whispers started, turned into murmurs and soon the yells of praise and joy were spitting insults and exclamations of pain. People yelled out questions, what had happened to the princess, where was she, who’d killed the princess. Why hadn’t you saved her? Your heart sunk, you couldn’t lift your eyes from the ground as you and the Mandalorian were escorted to the palace.

Din always hated a failed mission, letting targets getaway in mistakes was what kept him up at night, but this was so much worse. He didn’t have any personal connection to the girl but the vitriol spat at you and him as you walked through was tough to take. He kept his head up, trying to think of a plan for what might happen next.

The news of your failure had spread fast, arriving at the Master’s feet before you did. You knelt at his throne, the Mandalorian standing beside you.

“What news do you bring?” The Master asked. He didn’t need your answer, he just wanted to watch you squirm.

“I am afraid we were unsuccessful Master. An accident occurred at the camp and we two are the only survivors of the event. There was no way of recovering your daughter, I apologise,” You said finally looking up at him. Your voice was calm, collected and confident. There was nothing you could do now, it didn’t matter whether you were visibly upset or not.

“Mandalorian? Do they speak the truth?”

“Yes. Charges were set in the mines beneath the location and set as soon as we arrived,” He elaborated.

“I appreciate the aide Mandalorian, however without a successful return of my daughter I cannot pay you,” The master said. Din nodded, having expected as much, “Guards arrest L/n,”

“I assure you we did everything we could to get your daughter, none of this was their fault,” Din insisted.

“You are dismissed, Mando,” The Master ordered. Din didn’t move, his blaster raised at the guards approaching, standing between you and them to protect you.

“Stop it,” You hissed at him, alarmed that he was putting his survival at risk for you.

“Put the blaster down, Mandalorian. You are far outnumbered here. I suggest you leave me while you still can unless you would like to join L/n in front of a firing squad,”

“It’s not worth it,” You whispered, as you pushed yourself to stand up. You gritted your teeth as pain shot through you. You both knew this was how it would end, there was no other way, “I accept my fate,” You spoke loud enough for everyone else to hear. Din didn’t accept it, he refused to. He had only just got you into his life, whatever the relationship was between you two he wasn’t going to let you die for something that wasn’t your fault.

You were surrounded inside the palace. Din’s defiance was only drawing more soldiers in. The chances of either you or Din coming out alive were drawing in. You knew the Mandalorian was worth more, something inside you told you he had a great destiny before him. While our crossed paths had arrived at a pleasant spot you would like to continue, if that was the final destination of your lives then you wouldn’t be the one pulling him to a halt with you.

You stepped into the Mandalorian’s vision, soldiers drawing closer, and you placed your hand over his blaster. You looked directly into his visor, staring directly into his eyes. You didn’t have to speak, he knew it was over. Slowly, Din lowered his weapon and stepped back. With his hands up he nodded to the Master who smiled smugly and gave you one last look. As soon as the Mandalorian walked away the guards were on you, hands roughly tugged behind your back and into harsh cuffs.

Din didn’t look back. Couldn’t. If he did he would do something he would regret. The Master’s voice echoed out of the Palace doors relaying your sentence. You were to be executed at sundown. Din pulled himself into a comfortable stoic calm, and indifference forced upon himself to allow him to carry on. He walked out of the city with nothing. Penniless, hungry and alone.

The Razor Crest provided some comfort as it always did. No matter what changed around his outside could always be corrected inside the silver confines of his ship. He had enough fuel to get him to the next populated planet, hopefully, he would find work there to get food. He settled into the cockpit, flicking through maps for a while to see where he could go. After a while, the exhaustion of not sleeping properly for three days caught up and Din fell asleep in the pilot seat.

--

“Oi! Mando! Open up!” Hard rock being thrown at the front of the Crest and the sound of your voice startled him awake. It was dark now, the moon high in the sky above him. Din’s heart sunk, it was just a dream. You were gone now.

He let himself wonder for a moment if he could have done more, knowing that probably wasn’t true. The galaxy had a way of making things work out the way they should no matter what he did. He settled back against his chair again, head resting on his chest when something slammed against the side of the ship and shouted for him again and he knew he wasn’t dreaming.

He did a double-take when he saw you at the door. Dishevelled and breathing heavily, you grinned up at him. “I thought you were dead,” He said.

“I will be if you don’t let me in in a minute,” You looked over your shoulder as speeder lights approached over the brim of the hill. Din had barely stepped aside before you barreled into the ship.

He stared at you in the low light of the hull. confused by the image you presented. Your armour was half missing, only your chest plates and one thigh plate remained and you were covered in blood. You were not only alive but you had fought well for it. Considering the state you had been in just hours before, barely able to stand up unaided, he was astonished.

“What? It’s not my blood if you’re worried about that,” You wiped your face with the back of your hand then wiping it on your pant leg. “Hurry up and get this ship in the sky. We need to go right now,”

A blaster shot ricochet off the side of the Crest, the sound of bikes coming closer, setting Din back into motion. He raced back up to the cockpit to set off. You followed quickly and watched as the Mandalorian set to getting the ship into the air while under attack. You jumped into the seat behind him, giddy with excitement as the weight of what you had just done inside the city walls had not yet settled in. You were high on adrenaline. The engines roared into life and suddenly the Mandalorian turned back to look at you.

“I’m glad you’re not dead,” He said.

“I’m glad I’m not dead too,” you smiled, warmth spreading through your body at the sentiment,  “now please can we go,” A shot hit the front window making you duck instinctively. “Go!”

--

happy may the fourth guys!! omg i missed writing din so much!! 

tags: @beskar-falcon @peterssweetpea @beskarbabs @wille-zarr @this-cat-is-dea  @dameronology @fandom-blackhole @artsymaddie​

[beyondxmeasure]

Thank you to my lovely mutuals, @thebreadvansstuff and @dontworrylouis for tagging me in this challenge. I don't always do these types of things, but I saw it going around, and it got me thinking! So thanks for that!

Probably my number one goal is to keep myself accountable no matter what I put on this list and be able to cross everything off this time next year. We shall see, won't we... But for actual, tangible goals, here goes...

Complete my Big Bang in under 50K words. I've been working so hard this year at being a more concise writer. For some reason, it's easier for me to write tens of thousands of words than it is to just write one thousand.

Write fewer words in a more impactful way. Speaking of keeping it short and sweet, I want to tell a story well from start to finish in under 5K. One-shots, ficlets, drabbles, etc. I'd also love to figure out how to be a better writer faster and complete (more/shorter) works in less time.

Post outside of fic fests. I've literally only posted my work within fic fests and I think it would feel nice not to have the pressure of a deadline looming over me.

Complete my Fitness Instructor Harry fic. This will be my first ongoing chaptered fic that I post. I've only ever posted completed works, so it will be interesting to see how it goes to post something over time.

Finish other WIPs I've had on the back burner. Currently, I have at least 27 fic ideas between both fandoms I write for that I've been kicking around for the past two years. I want to finally turn at least some of those into finished works.

Advent Fic. Speaking of back burner WIPs, there was an idea I had in back December that I was really excited about but never made it past the brainstorming stage. I’d like to made that into my first Advent fic.

Sign up for fewer fic fests. My last three goals sort of lead up to this. In order to focus on my other writing that I already have going, I need to stop putting new things onto my plate. Of course, if I can make something already in-progress work for a fest, then mayyyybe.... but I tend to over-commit and put far too much pressure on myself in general for something that is supposed to be my fun escape from real life.

Help my Eroda Fic Fest idea to become a reality. Yeah, so I know I just said less fic fests... But it doesn't count if I create the fest myself, right? Right. Sure!

Tagging randomly... @homosociallyyours @littleroverlouis @beanno28 @reminiscingintherain @uhoh-but-yeah-alright @lightwoodsmagic @scrunchyharry @beelou @jaerie @jacaranda-bloom @kingsofeverything @crinkle-eyed-boo @creamcoffeelou @disgruntledkittenface @dinosaursmate @bearmustard @greenfeelings @larry-hiatus @larrysballetslippers @solvetheminourdreams

[lvnatiq]

Modern!au Felix Escellun x tattoo artist!gn!reader | Headcanons

a/n: Hey!!! I’m back at it again with my beautifully fucked up request fill. I’m still working on three other things, while I make you wait I took it upon myself to not starve this fandom. So here you have it. Please reblog or comment so that I have a crumb of motivation to keep up.

Should I do a smutty pt. 2 ? Who knows lmao.

Your hand slipped through the pile of designs that your colleague (and your close friend) had sent you to choose and pick apart from.

Unfortunately you were spending the night at the beautiful library of your uni, trying to balance off your school work with your actual work.

You didn’t mind spending your time under the faint scent of books and the mere sound of wood beneath you feet, but what you ‘do’ mind is the fact that the library is way colder than you thought it would be after the midnight.

Good thing that the yearning for finishing your work and leaving as soon as possible made it easier to concentrate on the task at hand.

It also made it easier for you to not notice the presence of an unexpected company.

That was until you felt the warm floral yet musky scent invade your senses as you felt the weight of cotton drape around your shoulders.

You slowly turn your head towards the owner of the coat who’s already making their way out. Desperately trying to find a way to make them stop but failing to raise your voice because of the circumstances.

The last picture of the person buried in your head was their hair caressed by the wind and their quick steps.

Fast forward to a week later, going completely out of luck with finding a place to stay you decide to ask help from your friend whom interestingly has a lot to offer.

With things going a lot smoother than you expected you stopped by the tattoo shop to finish your appointments with couple of customers before you left to meet up with your possible candidate.

“Don’t bother I’ll just call him here so you could talk comfortably.”

Your work seemed to take a lot longer than usual. So you kindly accepted your friends offer as you wrapped up the leftover stuff, finishing up the last customer.

“Hey, oh-“

The sight of your guest tickled your memories as you kept glaring at the glorious figure in front of you.

Felix, completely avoiding eye contact, placed the fallen hair strand behind his ear as he kept his eyes on the table of the tattoo equipments.

You quickly got up as you grabbed his coat from the hanger and walked back where you left him.

“Thank you for the coat, you really saved me back there.”

“Oh- no problem.”

That day you two chatted and melted the ice in between. Deciding to rent the close by apartment and start your roommate era.

Your friend smiled to themselves knowing all too well that felix was completely crazy about you.

Your encounter at the library wasn’t a coincidence either, well don’t think of him as a stalker now, he just dumped a couple of coins in the fountain wishing that you would be there that night. That’s all.

As you two moved in together you realized that there were a lot of things to be ‘caught off guard’ about him but you were most baffled by the tremendous amount of books felix owned.

“Hey Lover boy ! Would you mind recommending me some of them ?”

Felix blushes terribly and you love it so much that you constantly bother him in order to catch a glimpse of his flustered state.

Unbeknownst to you, the pile that felix left on the doorstep of your room was consisted of the books that he thought of you as he read.

Felix, abandoning his night owl habit, decided to fix his sleeping schedule for the better. Definitely not because he wanted to see you at morning before you got off to the work.

Insisting on offering you a ride on your way back home with his nice car.

Nearly every single day.

He knows that it may annoy you but he knows how much you are devoted to your responsibilities so he at least wants for you to save a bit of energy before you dive into the work.

Speaking of his nice car, it tickled your curiosity so you decided to check the price tag on the web and... well...

“Felix... you don’t so some sketchy illegal shit for a living right ?”

“It’s nearly impossible for me to work at the moment because of my studies. Why did you ask ?”

“Your car costs more than the apartment we are living in right now.”

With that, you discover that Felix’s father owns one of the most prominent chains of pharmaceutical companies and that he basically flee from his fathers mansion because he was pressuring Felix to take over his position in the future.

Being his puppet was not a thing to be tolerated in Felix’s book.

That being said, your domestic life with felix was pretty soft to say the least.

Cleaning together, cooking while talking about how your day went or getting to enjoy his expressions while he spilled his frustration against authors that didn’t affect him well.

Occasionally noticing the new cooking books appearing out of nowhere

and the delicious smell of food welcoming you after work, quite often than you expect.

Finally, more skinship.

One day whilst you two got through the gates of your apartment block you noticed the open doors of the elevator so instinctively you held Felix by the hand and ran into the mirrored box.

What you didn’t notice was the fact that you didn’t let go of his hand as you two went up.

From that day on Felix used every single opportunity to sneak his hand into yours.

Don’t blame him, it’s just that your hands are warm and the feeling of security that radiates from your fingertips is his medicine.

You absolutely avoided to tease or point it out to him because you knew that he would never do it again so you went with the flow.

You really enjoyed it though.

Snaking your arms around his waist while he is organizing the bookshelf. Feeling him shutter into your arms.

Nights became more and more enjoyable once he started to accompany you.

Everytime you caught him slacking on the sofa, you used his lap as a pillow.

Felix is extremely easy to figure out, mainly because he can’t hide anything.

Also, well

He is ticklish and you use his weakness against him, a lot.

Diving your fingers down to the sides of his tummy you started to tickle every possible sensitive spot you could catch on.

“Spit it out.”

“I-I wan’t you to- give me my first tattoo.”

Telling his words apart from his adorable giggles, needless to say you were ecstatic.

“Alright. What do I get in return ?”

“Name your price.”

You thoughtfully stared at the ceiling, humming as you blurted out your very obviously well thought out response.

“I want you to show me what keeps you up all night.”

You can’t be serious.

If you asked for an organ, he would’ve been more compliant.

You didn’t know what you got yourself into.

You basically asked for him to show you his ‘masterpieces’ that he showcases on AO3. Something that you were already well aware of.

“Deal ?”

“No !”

“Good ! Let’s see what you got.”

Felix anonymously contributed to the community by writing some of the most famous slow-burn stories on the web.

Just so you know, his author persona blew up thanks to the mind blowing, earth shattering smuts he wrote.

Yeah you heard that right

Smuts

Well he is fucking panicking now.

Nonetheless days kept on going as felix prayed each night to every single deity that you forgot your ‘deal’.

The days go on even if his worries don’t.

Did I say that Felix is a whimpering, whiny mess ? he struggles to stay in one position as the needle drags upon his skin.

“If you plan to keep on moving, I might as well strap you down felix. 5 more minutes and then we are done. Please behave.”

When you put it like that how can he refuse I mean you made things worse he is internally screaming at what you just said but he is not going to refuse a command when it’s given by you.

In exchange for giving him a tattoo you decide to let him give you one even though he’s inexperienced.

He’s terrified because he thinks that something would go wrong, his hand would slip or something and he would scratch that pretty skin of yours with a horrendous tattoo.

But you assured him nevertheless and offered him to draw something very minimal and easy. He accepted eventually.

As it turns out Felix is a natural. His hand is extremely steady and the tattoo turns out great.

Throughout the process he’s constantly asking if you’re hurt because he thinks that he’s doing something wrong but in fact he’s very delicate and gentle with the strokes and his touch.

You decide to be evil and use it against him. After you touch up your tattoo you lean in very closely and turn your cheek towards him.

“What are you doing ?” He stutters.

“I can’t possibly ask you to kiss my freshly made tattoo, so won’t you give me a kiss so that it heals faster.”

If his hands were steady before they weren’t now.

As soon as his lips left your cheek you held him by his wrist and pull him back close again so that you can lean in onto his ear.

“Don’t think that I’ve forgotten our deal. I am excited to see what you have in store for me tonight.” You winked.

Then the worst thing happened

The “tonight” came.

Felix was running in circles around the living room with one hand on his forehead wondering what could get worse after this.

Maybe you’ll be disgusted or scared hell if he knows.

He wanted to do nothing to harm your relationship in anyway because you and what you two have is all he ever wanted.

...and he believes that he has a tendency to ruin things.

But what happened was beyond his expectations.

Your eyes followed every single sentence throughout the screen, the white light traced your expressions as your eyebrows raised up and down and the corners of your lips inched closer to your ears. Your lower lip became a victim of your teeth’s assault.

He was so confused. Still waiting for you to lash out or make fun of him, at least.

“I used to think ‘what am I gonna do with you’ when it comes to you. Mostly out of frustration.”

Yet here you were with the laptop closed shut and your arms behind your head as you closed your eyes and groaned.

Slowly the smile plastered on your face grew.

”Now I know what to with you.”

[satoruvt]

for a moment i forget to worry

pairing → xu minghao x reader

word count → 3196

genre → fluff + angst, college au ↳ tags: strangers to friends to lovers </3, college kinda sux, ROOMMATE CHAN MAKES AN APPEARANCE OR TWO, dance major minghao, reader is completely lost but its ok who isnt, lots of cute couple stuff, pov ur entire relationship with minghao. thats it, a sad break up scene, a solid amount of crying

summary → there’s something about minghao. maybe it’s the way he dances, vibrant and youthful, or maybe it’s the way he loves you. based off of hunger by florence + the machine.

warnings → i hint at sex but its pretty vague, i also mention a breakdown type deal (revolving around school/life after school)

a/n → first of all this was NOT supposed to be 3k words i dont know how it happened. second of all i’m only kind of happy with this HAHA i feel like the story itself isnt bad but i wanted it to match the song more ... idk :/ i hope u guys like it regardless !!!

pieces of you masterlist

The first time you see him is by accident.

Really - all you’re doing is trying to find Chan. You’re passing by the practice rooms, looking into them in hope he’ll be there, stopping to gaze at decorations and medals and trophies lined up on the walls. It’s when you approach a room that music plays from that you think you’ve found Chan, but when you gaze in, it’s definitely not him.

You don’t know who it is, but he moves like nothing you’ve ever seen before.

It’s hypnotizing, almost makes you want to drop your things and dance with him. There’s a sense of youth that comes from him and it’s almost overwhelming - but it’s not in energy, necessarily, but rather from the precision of his movements, the technicalities that he seems to both follow and break at the same time. Something vibrant seeps out between the seams of his body, colors you can barely recognize as they splash against anything they can reach. It’s almost tangible. 

You watch him long enough for him to finish his performance (an unknowing one) with the last notes of a song you forgot was even playing. His eyes meet with yours, slow as he completes an eloquent turn, and at the same time, a hand meets your shoulder.

A small wave of embarrassment washes over you, and you turn towards whoever touched you, effectively breaking eye contact. “What are you doing here?” Chan asks, hair still wet from what you assume was a shower.

“Looking for you,” you tell him, following as he starts to walk towards the exit. “I wanted lunch, and you owe me for that time I took your British literature quiz for you.”

Chan groans but agrees to pay, and you laugh, though the world seems a little paler than it did a few moments ago.

The second time you see him is by chance.

(Maybe.)

You’re waiting for a lecture to start, tapping your fingers against your laptop idly as you watch students trickle in last minute. It’s not a strict course, but it does start at nine in the morning, and most everyone shows up with a coffee.

You look down to brush a stray hair off of your table, and when you look up again, the dancer from before walks through the door, then looks right at you.

You feel a blush heat your face and it’s like he wants to make sure that you know that he knows, because he almost refuses to look away. You break eye contact first (like the last time, you remember for no reason) but still watch as his figure moves up the stairs, past the rows, and you hope he’ll just move past you too…

He doesn’t. He takes the empty seat right next to yours, and you don’t say anything, instead finding the peeling sticker on your laptop incredibly interesting. The professor comes in and decides that today he’ll take extra long to set everything up, apparently, and you want to scream.

“So,” the dancer says, voice quiet. It takes your breath away, the way he sounds. “Mind if I ask why you were watching me the other day?”

You cast a glance at him - not too long, you don’t think you could handle more than five seconds tops - and finally open your laptop so it makes you look busy. “I was waiting for a friend.”

“And?”

The smile in his voice is palpable. You’re already exasperated.

“You…” you start, finally deciding to look at him as some sort of subconscious power move. “You’re a beautiful dancer. It was hard not to watch.”

Beautiful doesn’t even cover half of it, but you figure he already thinks you’re weird for watching him, so you hold back the thoughts of youth and vibrancy and color. The dancer looks at you, almost blank for a moment, before a soft smile draws itself on his face. It makes your heart beat a little faster. He says “thank you” with a gentle tone, sincerely felt.

The class starts, and the two of you don’t speak throughout the next hour and a half. You type out notes on your laptop and you see him write down names of the paintings being shown on the projector, little thoughts and notes written afterwards.

By the end of class, your professor assigns an optional partnered project, and you’re more than prepared to head back to your apartment and start on it yourself. The dancer stops you before you leave, however, asks if you’d like to be his partner.

(And he says it like that, would you like to be my partner, polite and somehow sweet.)

You know your answer. “I don’t even know your name,” you stall, standing from your chair. 

“Minghao,” he tells you. “I’m Minghao, and I’d like for you to be my partner.”

You say yes easily, put your number into his contacts even easier. The sky is blue when you leave the lecture hall, trees dotted with pink and purple flowers, and it is all so bright that you forget it wasn’t this way in the first place.

The third time you see him is for school.

Underneath the excitement of giving Minghao your number, there is the knowledge that it’s for the sake of an assignment. He texts you the day after to ask if you’re free to meet up to work and you tell him sure.

(Sure is what you send back, but he doesn’t have to know that you burst into Chan’s room immediately after, plunging face first into his bed just to scream into his pillows. Chan had sighed, turned around in his desk chair to look at you, then asked what happened. He gave you two minutes to rant and then kicked you out, back to your own room.)

You and Minghao agreed to meet at the library on a day that neither of you had any afternoon classes, and you get there early, spend some time working on other classes. You have somewhere around thirty minutes to freak out to yourself before you see Minghao come in, dressed like he knows what he���s doing to you (which is really just a hoodie and jeans, but you think it’s the cap that really pulls the whole boyfriend look together), smiling when he finds you at a table in the corner.

“How are you?” is the first thing he says when he sits down, and you pull down your laptop screen a little to see him better.

“I’m good,” you say, feeling your heart pound. “What about you?”

Minghao sends you a kind smile. “Really good. Should we get started?”

You lose count of how many times you see him after that.

Meeting up to work on the project soon becomes just meeting up, and after the project’s done and turned in, it happens even more. You hang out and get lunch, send each other texts and stupid videos, take walks around campus together. The weeks pass, summer mellows into fall, then into the early days of winter. You develop a genuine friendship with him, finding comfort in his presence, looking for him wherever you go. 

(Although the crush is still there, potent and patient, stubborn in a way you’ve never experienced before. You wonder if it’s a sign of some sort.)

You’re in one of the practice rooms with him, sitting in the corner. You had a class nearby and he’d wanted to practice a little more, so you told him you’d work on your own stuff while he finished up and then the two of you could grab something to eat.

But you made a small error on your part - the dancing. You’d forgotten the way he moves (you haven’t seen him dance since that first time) and in no time at all you’re letting your screen go dark in front of you and watching him. Honestly, it’s not your fault, you really can’t help it. 

But of course he notices.

Minghao meets your eyes through the mirror and raises his eyebrows at you, and all you can do is look away, desperately try to get your laptop up and running again so at least it seems like you weren’t watching him for too long.

“You’re staring,” he says, long after you’ve looked away.

“Sorry,” you tell him anyways, immediate, quick. 

Then he says, “I never said anything about stopping.”

In a second, you look up from your laptop and up at him. He moves closer, crouches in front of you. His eyes are kind - they’re never not - but you think you see something a little more in them. “Sorry, I think I missed that last part,” you respond, blinking. Minghao smiles like you’re endearing.

“I said I want you to keep looking at me.”

You think you’re barely breathing when he shuts your laptop for you, slides it off of your lap and onto the floor (gently, with care, and it’s a wonder to you how he can focus on that right now). He practically crawls over you, one of his hands eventually reaching the junction of your jaw and neck and holding there. “I’m gonna kiss you now, if that’s okay,” he says, but doesn’t move. You nod as soon as his words reach your brain, eager and quick.

And the next few hours get a little wound up in your head, a little mixed in with the feeling of his body - that moves so youthfully, with so much vibrancy that it reaches everything around you - melting into yours and the sound of him asking you to tell me what you need, honey, and the still-playing slow jam music he was practicing to.

You watch him sleep next to you, hand curled around yours against his pillows, and think that nothing bad could ever touch him.

The two of you… come together, after that.

Neither you nor Minghao use any proper labels, but you both seem to know. No labels are needed, really. You have each other and that’s all there is to it. And everything is really good.

You work together and laugh together like you’ve always known each other. He tries to teach you to dance with him when you’re in the practice room with him, pulls you up by your hands and guides you through your giggles. He was the first person you called when you realized that you had no idea what you were working towards, didn’t have a clue what you actually wanted to do with your life. He gets along well with your friends and you text his because they’re basically yours, now, too.

Winter turns back into spring, slow and easy. Vibrant and youthful. You’re not able to meet Minghao’s parents, but he meets yours (and you’re sure a quick introduction to his mom over a FaceTime call has to count for something). The two of you take advantage of the newfound warmth of the season and try to get out as much as you’re able to, with picnics and city dates and anything you can think of. A drawer in his dresser is reserved for your things, you bought an extra toothbrush for him to use when he stays over.

You watch him dance. It still feels like the first time, like color and breathlessness. You tell him he’s beautiful every time, feel yourself fall a little deeper when he still gets bashful amidst his comedown. You tell him you love him for the first time after he gets done with a performance - a proper one, for a showcase of the dance club he’s in. He says it back.

You think he put all the stars in the sky just for the two of you to gaze at them together.

Things shift the beginning of your junior year.

Minghao tells you about a program he’s applying to, a proper dance academy in New York that could really kickstart his career. Training under some of the best choreographers and performers in the world.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” You ask him after he tells you, and he shrugs, leaning back in his chair. You’re studying at his apartment tonight.

“It’s just…” he frowns. “It’s so far away, you know?”

Oh. You hadn’t even thought about that, too caught up in the excitement of him being able to apply at all. A quick sigh leaves your lips, and then you reach for his hand, hold it between both of your own.

“That’s okay,” you tell him, though now that you’re thinking about it, you feel nervousness in the pit of your stomach. “We can work something out, though, when we get that far. We’ll figure it out.”

Minghao nods, a fond look in his eyes. He pulls one of your hands to his lips. “We’ll think about it if I even get accepted,” he says.

It’s bittersweet, but a promise nonetheless.

Fifteen minutes after you get a call from Minghao, there’s a knock on your door. 

You wouldn’t necessarily say you’re worried, but, well. Everyone’s experienced the jump of anxiety when they get hit with the “I want to talk to you about something” line. Nonetheless, you stand from the couch to open the door, mentally preparing yourself for any and everything. 

“Hey,” you greet when you see Minghao, opening the door to let him in. His face is unreadable. “Everything okay?”

He walks a few steps into your apartment, waits for you to close the door before turning back around to face you. Then he holds up a piece of paper, the creases from where it was folded still bending. You send him a confused look.

“I got in,” he says, a grin breaking on his face, and you blink, then feel your jaw practically hit the floor. Minghao only nods like he understands, and before you know what you’re doing, you launch yourself at him, holding him close.

“Oh my god, Hao, that’s amazing,” you say into his sweater, then step back to get a proper look at him. Youthful, vibrant. “I’m so proud of you.”

He seems to soften at your words, pulls you back into him again with a gentle kiss to your head. “Thank you for believing in me,” he tells you, tenderness palpable in his voice. All you can do is squeeze him tighter.

Minghao spends a lot of time away from you after that.

You’re not really hurt in any way - even though he got into the academy in New York, he still has to practice. You get it, this is important. He doesn’t text you as often, isn’t able to stop by as much, and you miss him, but you know how much this means for him. But it gets… weird, almost, after a while. Strange, even for him. It feels weird that he’s set to leave at the end of January and it’s December and he’s distant.

Both of you are laying in your bed, looking at the glow-in-the-dark stars on your ceiling, when you decide to bring it up. “You’ve been… kinda far away lately,” you start, nudging him with your shoulder gently. “Everything okay?”

His eyes stay on your ceiling, but you feel the way he sighs. “It’s about the program,” he says.

“Okay.”

“And about… you and me.”

Oh. That doesn’t… sound the best. “About, like… what we’re gonna do?”

Minghao nods.

You say, “I wouldn’t mind visiting every so often. It’d be hard, but I’m sure we could find something to work.”

Minghao shakes his head, says, “no.”

You pause, and when you look at him he’s already looking at you. What does he mean by no? Does he want you to move with him? Or does he -

He reaches for your hand and you think oh.

His eyes are a little glassy. You feel the tears come, too.

“Oh,” you say out loud. Minghao squeezes your hand. “So this is… this is it?”

Your room is suddenly cold, and you want to crawl under the covers and stay there. The person in front of you is blurred into something unrecognizable, but you can’t be bothered to blink away your tears.

“I think so, love,” he whispers back to you. “I think it has to be.”

The two of you cry like that for a while. In your bed, loosely intertwined and broken. Even the way Minghao cries carries a kind of vibrancy that’s overwhelming, makes you think of the first time you saw him so long ago, and now -

When you manage to get a better grip on yourself, you ask him if you can still see him off at the airport. He says, “I don’t know what I’d do if you didn’t.”

Then you ask if you can kiss him again. He responds by kissing you first. 

And it’s sad, it tastes like salt and sorrow and you feel like the promises you never got the chance to make are broken. It feels like the most beautiful blue you’ve ever seen, and you know it’s only a branch of Minghao’s color.

He leaves soon after that, pulls on his shoes and his coat and turns around at the door to give you a tired smile. After he’s gone, you drag yourself to Chan’s bedroom, and once he sees the state you’re in, he offers up one side of his bed. Neither of you say anything, but the friendly reassurance of his hand in yours says enough.

You don’t fail to notice that everything seems to be washed out, a blandness you’re not used to.

The last time you see him is at the airport.

It’s a cold day, despite being sunny. The airport offers little warmth, but you figure it doesn’t matter. You won’t be here for long. 

It doesn’t take you very long to find Minghao - you still look for him wherever you go, even if you’re not looking for him. Even then, it’s still so easy for you to find him, to pinpoint that vibrancy, that youth. He’s talking to a few others, you think you met them. Soonyoung and Jun.

Minghao meets your eyes and you freeze, but then he waves you over with a gentle smile. You follow like you think you always will. 

You greet Soonyoung and Jun and the four of you talk, albeit a little awkwardly, even when Soonyoung tries his hardest to lighten the mood. Eventually he has to leave, and Jun follows with a shy goodbye. They both hug Minghao before they go.

You’re not sure what to say, but after a minute, you find words. “I don’t know what I’ll do without you,” you tell him, a little selfishly. 

Minghao says, “you’ll do good. I know you will. I’m not worried about you.”

He pulls his phone out of his pocket to check the time, and you think he’ll give you a stiff and sad goodbye, but he steps a little closer to you. Looks at you the way he used to.

“Maybe…” he starts, then pauses. “Maybe we’ll meet again.”

Maybe, you think. Maybe.

“I hope so,” you tell him, then watch as he leaves.