#HES SO GOATED! BASED. THE MAN FR

[noxtivagus]

YOSHI PPPPPPPPPP FFXIV MY LOVE FFXVI MY LOVE FF MY LOVE

[redbullgirly]

Can you do a Lewis Hamilton smau where she is basically like Barbie? I feel like since Barbie is a fashion icon and so is Lewis, it would be a match made in Heaven. I read your pinned post and tried to make a request based on your rules. Sorry if it isn’t good enough

HI BARBIE! HI KEN! [part 1, LH44 smau]

Lewis Hamilton x reader

Masterlist & Hi Barbie! Hi Ken! [part2, LH44 smau]

Summary: Lewis Hamilton is part-time Formula One driver and full-time fashion icon. And so is his girlfriend, Y/N Y/L/N, who's also known as a real life Barbie.

Warnings: None... but a lot of pink XD. Also this story is set in December 2023, so no broken hearts over Lewis going to Ferrari... actually maybe just a little teaser.

Author's Note: Hi Anon! This request is great and thank you so much for it, it definitely is good enough! :) I had fun writing and creating this, even though at the end it's kind of different than what I firstly intended to do. The original idea was to make Y/N very Barbie coded, but at the end I'd say she's Barbie inspired and I focused more on the fashion icon part of the request. Though there's a sweet storyline about why her nickname is Barbie, so I hope you won't be disappointed! :)

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lewishamilton A lot happened in 2023 season and there was also a lot of outfits 🤞🏾✨

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user1 MY GOD THIS MAN IS BEAUTIFUL!

yourusername this was definitely one of my favs 💝

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lewishamilton What can I say... pink is the color of real men 🫶🏾

yourusername but do i still wear it the best?

lewishamilton Of course ma'am

user2 I love them sm 😭

user3 can we talk about the fact they're the best couple ever?!

user4 so sweet🥰

user5 And the fact she's literally the only person he interacts with in the comments...

user6 You are the best Lewis, can't wait for another season 👏

user7 🔥❤️

mercedesamgf1 Did someone say Barbie and Ken?💘

user8 YES

user9 admin you're so real for this... they literally ARE our barbie and ken 🤭

user10 The only question is who is the Barbie and who's the Ken? xd

user11 lol imagine barbie lewis💀

user12 GOAT ⬆️♥️

carmenmmundt Me and goergerussell63 when?

gourgerussell I don't really think pink is my colour...😬

yourusername don't worry honey, if he won't wear pink w you i will 😘

carmenmmundt Oh I knew why you're my favourite Y/N 😘

georgerussell63 No wait I changed my mind darling!!

carmenmmundt Hmm now I'll have to think about it 🤔

georgerussell63 Y/NNNNN

yourusername 😌😚

user13 i love how he always manages to get y/n into his posts

user14 The power boyfriend Lewis has over me😩😩

user15 RIGHT?!

user16 he's just so... asdgsagfsgd 😫

user17 I literally need this version of him to live!!!

user18 i'm weak for bf lewis🥵

user19 Y/N looks SO GOOD in that coat

user20 I need to know how she does it

user21 fr

user22 The best driver and a fashion icon... damn he's got some talent 🙇‍♂️

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yourusername great season and now it'll be even better winter break w my love 💋💞

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f1 Our own Barbie🤩

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user1 yeeeees

user2 Wait I'm new in formula one, why do we call Lewis Hamilton's gf Babrie??

user3 idk user2 she just gives off the energy 😆

user4 Actually I think Lewis himself once called her Barbie in an interview when there were rumors about them dating and then it just stuck with her 🤷‍♀️

user5 oh really?!! tbh i had idea he ever called he barbie himself... y/n is just iconic xd

user6 IT'S Y/N'S WORLD AND WE'RE JUST LIVING IN IT 🗣🗣

lewishamilton Can't wait to spend the winter break with you ✨

yourusername *mwah*

user7 pls I'm so excited for them!!

user8 the vacation photo dumps are gonna slay🤭

alexandrasaintmleux stoppp you're so pretty!🎀

yourusername nooo you are alex 🥹🫶

user9 they could never make me hate these two just 'cause they're dating the hottest drivers on the grid🫡

user10 The outfit in the second photo? HELLO?!

kellypiquet 🤍

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charles_leclerc I see you like the Monaco circuit very much👀

yourusername i see you're stalking my photo dumps very carefully charles leclerc 🤨

charles_leclerc Well I have a feeling we'll see each other more often soon so I have to get to know you better😉

this comment has been deleted by charles_leclerc

charles_leclerc Caught in the crime😂

user11 WHAT WAS THAT CHARLES?!

user12 omg I wasn't the only one to see it? I'm not delusional right?🫣

user13 idk what you saw 'cause i didn't but this interaction is so funny to me XD

user14 mommy- sorry... MOTHER

user15 ❣️❣️

user16 y/n & lew >>>>

twitter

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yourusername i'm barbie. he's just a ken (and he won some trophy for p3 in the championship... idk where it is) 💖💄

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user1 I live for Lewis leaving the trophy there💀

user2 and the way y/n basically confirmed this by saying she has no idea where it is😭

lewishamilton You're everything. I'm just Ken 🙏🏾✨

yourusername exactly... though you're the best ken ever 💞

sebastianvettel Isn't he more like Allan then?

yourusername ohhh true seb 🤭

user3 YOU WANNA TELL ME THE SEBASTIAN VETTEL SAW BARBIE

yourusername yeah we made him watch it and he cried during gloria's speech 💓

sebastianvettel I'm not ashamed about it.

yourusername and that's why i love u seb 🫶

user4 why aren't all men like sebastian???😩

user5 I love these three with all my heart y'all don't understand

user6 my fav driver watching my fav movie and crying during speech about feminism is my roman empire

user7 AAAHSDFHFGSDHSG😍

f1 If there was a prize for fashion icons, the Hamilton household would definetly win it! 🏆

liked by the author

user8 not admin calling them hamilton household🥹

user9 Lol that would be the only fairly given trophy this year

user10 OMG I just realized that one day Y/N and Lewis WILL be both HAMILTON😭😭

user11 I'll tattoo the date of their wedding on my arm fr

user12 that's real dedication user11 💀

user13 TRUE DEFINITION OF A QUEEN... LOVE YOUUUUUU

kellypiquet Gorgeous darling!💖💖💖

yourusername we both babeee 💖🫶

user14 the IT wags casually supporting each other

user15 I love they're still friends even though their bfs are probably the biggest rivals xd

user16 not the shade about the trophy💀

user17 Waiiittt what happened?

user18 someone who was at the ceremony said lewis gave him the prize 'cause he didn't want it😭

user17 Oh and Y/N wrote in her caption she doesn't know where it is?

user18 exactly😭

user17 Whoops... I love her, she's queen for that

user19 and the fact fia tried to deny these rumors💀

user20 Absolutely love this look 🤍

user21 you and lew are just such a good looking couple

user22 THE DRESS I REPEAT THE DRESS🥰

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lewishamilton 🇲🇨 with the best company.

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roscoelovescoco Mom's look's so handsome's ☺️☀️

liked by the author and yourusername

lewishamilton Agreed

yourusername awww my boys are too sweet 🥹💕

user1 lewis complimenting his gf not w one but TWO accounts makes my heart melt

liked by yourusername

user2 I want a man like him🤧

user3 WE LOVE ROSCOE CALLING HER MUM

user4 Lewis, Y/N & Roscoe are the best trio ever🥰

user5 parents and their son

user6 literally omg

yourusername wow who's that handsome boy laying on a couch 🥴😻

lewishamilton Handsome you say?😏

yourusername yeah, right next to u 🥰

lewishamilton Oh no, I should've seen that coming😒

roscoelovescoco Thank's mom's I'm handsome's boy's 😊👅

user7 these interactions give me the will to live

user8 I love the Hamilton family🥺

user9 lol y/n calling roscoe handsome xd

user10 The funniest part about this is that Lewis manages Roscoe's profile😭

user11 omg yes user10 not him playing being offended on his main and then being all sweet as roscoe...

user12 Love forever ❤️

user13 Y/N is so beautiful I can't believe my own eyes

user14 the two belong together forever 🙌🫶♾️💫

user15 fr

user16 If they ever break up I'll stop believing on love

mercedesamgf1 Mr. & Mrs. Mercedes

user17 pls give him decent car in 2024 to win another championship🙏

user18 The most iconic couple in history of motorsport 💅

user19 ❤️😍

user20 what's Ferrari doing in the likes?🤨

user21 lol calm down... he's literally lewis hamilton🤣

user22 No but it's weird... they never like other team's things

user23 and after the rumors during monaco gp too 🥸🥸

user24 I think this photo dump caused global warming... like daaammmnnn they're both so fine 🥵

user25 let's just say roscoe isn't the only one calling them mommy and daddy-

user26 lmao

user26 but true🫢

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yourusername barbie has a great day everyday... especially when she gets pink mercedes she wanted 🛍🤍

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lewishamilton Seems like Ken is good for something

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yourusername maybeeee

lewishamilton You want pink Ferrari too, don't you?

yourusername ☺️☺️

user1 ohhh to have a man like that

user2 OMG LEWIS PLS GET HER PINK FERRARI

user3 Yeah, Y/N will slay in that car😌

user4 i wanna be barbie too if she gets pink mercedes

user5 but first you'll need to have a ken like lewis hamilton

francisca.cgomes this barbie is so prettyyyy

yourusername love u! 💓

user6 Okay okay I NEED the bikini😫😍

user7 QUEEN

user8 Y/N looking gorgeous like always🫶🏼

user9 gold digger alert!!!!🤮

user10 Girl go away, you clearly know nothing about their relationship xd

user11 jealousy alert!!!

user12 the first pic does something to me 😩

user13 The most beautiful woman ever

user14 Lewis won lottery w her

user15 yes she's literally so pretty and they seem so happy together🥰

user16 fr I don't think I've seen him this happy before

user17 yeah he looks so much calmer and even younger when y/n is with him at event and gps...🥹

user18 Plus the OUTFITS?! I love them sm

user19 Where is Lewis 🙂?

user20 c'mmon he doesn't have to be in every post she makes🙄

user21 stunning as always 💘

user22 SLAYING AS ALWAYS

twitter

Y/N’s interview

photo 1: Y/N: How did you and Lewis meet?

Y/F/N: Oh, you guys'll love the story!

photo 2: Y/N: It was actually in a toy store. Lew was there with his niece and I was there because... [laughs] Let's say I still like to collect dolls and lego, sue me.

photo 3: Y/N: Anyway, Lew's niece saw me, thought I'm a real life Barbie and wanted to say hi. [laughs] It was honestly so sweet that I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm just a normal girl.

photo 4: Y/F/N: So does she still think you're Barbie? [laughs]

Y/N: Yeah, I think so... She calls me Auntie Barbie! [laughs too]

photo 5: Y/N: But back to Lewis - I didn't recognize him and just thought he's really cute. We talked for few minutes, though then I had to leave and didn't have the courage to ask for his number.

photo 6: Y/N: But few days later he followed me on Instagram and I was just like - yes!

Lewis’ interview

Interviewer: Lewis, you recently followed a known influencer and model on Instagram. Is there something going on between the two of you?

Lewis: Are you talking about Barbie? Oh, shoot, sorry... [laughs] I mean Y/N?

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yourusername aesthetic life w the best man, cute son and lots of flowers 🌸💖

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roscoelovescoco I got's mom's the's flowers's 😊🌷

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yourusername thx roscoe baby!! 🫶 guess daddy will have to learn from you 😌🤍

user1 ... are we gonna talk about the fact y/n just called lewis daddy?

yourusername ... no please don't, you know what i meant 😭🙈

user2 Too late Y/N, the twitter girlies are going to go nuts about this (me included)

landonorris Awww look at that grumpy little dude 🥺

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pierregasly Mate are you calling the seven world time champion grumpy little dude?🤣

user3 lando tf-

user4 This is so funny for no reason😭

user5 Lewis being called grumpy little dude wasn't what I expected from this winter break tbh

landonorris ROSCOE

landonorris I WAS TALKING ABOUT ROSCOE GUYS

user6 💀💀

pierregasly Lol

yourusername why did you even think it was about lewis peirregasly ??🧐

landonorris YEAH MR. TRIPOD TELL US

pierregasly Goodbye...👋

user7 u and lew are so sweet

user8 MOTHER IS MOTHERING 😍

alexandrasaintmleux Shining like a star✨💖

yourusername and you're my sun ☀️💖

user9 I want a man who gives me so many flowers!!!

user10 yeah and they're beautiful and tasteful too

lewishamilton So lucky to have you darling! 🫧🫶🏾

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yourusername we're both so lucky lew 💗🫶

user11 and i'm lucky i was born in the same century as you so i can witness this love

user12 I LOVE Y/N & LEWIS🥰

user13 I'll ask again... When is he going to put a ring on it? 💍 C'mon Lewis you obviously love her sm

user14 Your guys love is so special ❤️

user15 if this is the content we'll be getting during winter break, i don't think i want it to end

user16 races are great... but boyfriend material lewis hamilton is better🤤

user17 REAL

THE END

Author's Note: Hi and thank you for reading! I'll be glad for likes, reblogs, comments, follows and any other ways of support. PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF YOU WANT PART 2! I really enjoyed this version of Lewis and Y/N... and perhaps I have a lot of pictures that unfortunately didn't make it to the story because picture limit isn't very friendly. Love you and have a great day! :)

[konata-izumi-kinny-writes]

Rescue Bots x Reader romantic hcs

Seperate

[A/n: I know its weird that i like these four. Shish.]

Anyways here yall go.

Heatwave

Beeg frumpy man

Literally just picked you up and said, "I love you. You're mine now." And walked off with you

Hes a tsundere at first but grows softer the longer you're with him.

Fr he needs someone who'll listen to him rant or smth without making fun of him

Give this big boi a hug

He'll be confused, but he'll grow to like it

Kiss the big man.

He got BIG soft lips, well, big compared to you but you get the point.

You may be wondering how the flip they're soft.

The answer is, 'a flip ton of bendy cords and fuel lines layered with some memory foam and waterproof carbon fiber cloth' (same goes for the others)

Another thing you can do is pepper his face plates with kisses

Automatically starts blushing.

VERY protective and lowkey jealous

He carries you around like a baby. Theres no reason for it, thats just what he does. If Kade has any snarky remarks to say about it, you bet Heatwave is gonna clap back with something better.

Treats you like glass.

You're just so teeny tiny compared to him and he doesn't want to hurt you.

He'll feel absolutely terrible if he does.

Despite all of that though, he does generally treat you like a normal person. As well as letting you have your own life.

Do NOT make self deprivating jokes around this dude. For multiple reasons.

1, they make him stressed and sad (he won't admit that hes sad in front of the others tho)

2, It automatically triggers him to be even MORE protective

3, Heatwave will aggressively tell you how much he loves you and how pretty/handsome you are

For example,

'*Squishes your face with his fingers*, "Shush. You're fragging amazing. Say anything like that again, and i'm snuggling you for the entire godamn day."'

He doesn't yell at you though. Just has an aggressive tone.

He does the same for any insecurities you have too.

Oh, and he means every word he says when it comes to his bellicose praises.

"...I warned you, Dear."

*proceeds to pick you up in his hands and lay down somewhere while holding you against his chassis*

LOTS of kisses. Like for real you'll be out of breath when he's done with you.

It doesn't end there either.

He sometimes puts you in the passenger seat if there's an emergency so he can still keep an eye on you.

Depends on the emergency

He gets angrier than usual if you're the one in danger, he only calms down once you're safe.

Chase

He loves and supports you so much aaa-

He was VERY blunt when he confessed to you

"(Name). Forgive me for saying but I have fallen in love with you, and wish for you to be my conjunx endura. You don't have to feel the same, but you have the right to know."

He was lowkey surprised when you said you felt the same

Chase proceeded to kneel down and pull you into a hug. You responded with hugging him back along with a kiss on the faceplates, the rest is history.

He loves any kind of affection you give him, just don't use sarcasm, he can't pick up on it.

His love language is usually physical touch, words of affirmation, and quality time

Chase only wants three things from you throughout this relationship.

Your happiness, your affection, and your safety.

Though he does want to keep you safe he's not really overprotective.

He insists on carrying you if you're somewhere where one of them could step on you.

You used to go on patrol with him...

Until you almost got merc'd by a haywire lawn mower.

Since then you stay at base, and he always looks forward to seeing you run up to him when he gets back.

Hes not a fan of scary movies, but he'll be fine if you're holding his hand or hugging him.

Bring an inhaler, you'll need it for how much he'll make you laugh

At this point he's still trying to learn human culture... that (un)fortunately includes slang

"(Name), look. I have acquired an 'annelid on a string'"

"Dearest conjunx, what is 'Goated with the sauce' and why does a caprine have a condiment?"

"(Name), what does it mean to 'simp' for someone?"

Whether you feed this fire or not is up to you.

Pet names include; Dearest, Honey, Love, My Light, My Conjunx Endura, ....scrinkle (I'm not sorry)

Despite the mixups with slang, hes still pretty damn blunt.

Not to mention, even with how monotonous Chase is pretty romantic when hes talking to you.

This means that you can tell that he's being honest whenever he starts whispering sweet nothings to you.

And Chase mean everything he says.

And he always looks you in the eyes when he says one specific line, just so you know he really means it.

"I love you"

Blades

Oml hes so friggin nervous.

He didn't confess to you... Kade did

He heard Blades talking to Dani about you so he decided to mess with him.

"HEY (NAME), BLADES TOTALLY HAS A HUGE CRUSH ON YOU!!"

"NO I DON'T, SHISH!!!"

He only admitted it once you said you felt the same

"...you do!? This isn't a cruel joke right?... I.. love you too."

He leaned down and gave you a kiss on the forehead

HES SO SWEET TO YOU

Lots of snuggles, hand holding, kisses, hugs, carrying you around, you name it!

Flip, he loves touching you in general.

You're just so squishy compared to his kind, he can't help but be enamored

Big touch-starved snugglebug

He likes watching tv with you on his chest

Sometimes the baking shows he comes across motivate him to bake something for you.

Half the time its good, half the time it isn't.

Pet names are; Sweetie, Honey Bunny, Cupcake, Lil Squisha, and My Spark if he's feeling really romantic

Don't yell at him please :(

He will be more anxious and sad if you do.

Its enough from others, it hurts more if its from you.

Unless you're happy and excited. He'll be yelling with you.

Very protective and jealous

He isn't too overbearing with it though

Hes just nervous and scared

Nervous about something/someone hurting you, and scared that someone will take you from him.

Thats why he doesn't take you with him on missions, even with how much he misses you.

Please comfort him when hes scared, he REALLY needs it.

Blades loves your laugh so much

He'll find the cheesiest jokes to say just to get the smallest noise out of you.

He'll be very impressed with whatever talent you have, and will try his best to support you.

KISS THE BEEG NERVOUS BOIBOI

He needs it... badly.

Will immediately turn blue and get extremely flustered, but he loves it and won't stop you

He gives you little trinkets he finds at random... well, they're little to him.

"Y/N! I got something for you :3" *Proceeds to place the biggest tumbleweed you've ever seen right in front of you*

Sometimes, Blades legit out of nowhere picks you and and carries you somewhere where nobody else is around

He proceeds to lay down and put you on his chest

Totally peppers your face in kisses before looking you right in your eyes and saying how much he loves you.

"I love you so much, Honey bunny. You're my little cupcake and i won't give you up for anything or anyone. I promise."

Boulder

Hes so sweet to you

It took some encouragement and advice from Gram for him to confess to you, but he did it!

He went out and picked a bouquet for you too

He sat down criss cross applesauce and told you how he felt after taking a deep breath.

"(Name)... I have.. developed some strong feelings for you.. romantic ones. You don't have to say yes, but i still want to ask.. will you please be my love for life?"

You of course said yes and gave him a hug before he could even give you your bouquet

He closed his eyes and returned the hug, all the while rubbing your back.

Dates at the zoo are a must. Obviously. Like cmon now. This is Boulder we're talking about.

Will bring you random plants and animals and ask if he can keep them

If not that, then he'll pick flowers and other plants for you. Ofc he makes sure theyre not spiky.

He paints for you.

GIVE HIM SMOOCHES

Theres nothing he loves more than your lips

Well- he loves your tummy too.

Its a tie

ANYWAYS-

SNUGGLE THE BIG HIMBO HE NEEDS IT

(They all do but you get the point)

Like Heatwave, he carries you like a baby. But he just does it because he thinks you're cute.

Like for real, to Boulder, you're the cutest little fleshy he's ever seen.

Until he sees a baby.

He looks at you with the most "🥺" expression ever

"[Name]-"

"No we're not having a baby, bubbas. Sorry"

"🥺"

His pet names for you are; Dearest, Bunny, My Flower, Small one, Sweetie, Dove, Angelfish, Wifey/Hubby/Lovey (whichever you prefer or identify as)

He loves you, but no. You can't go w him on emergencies.

Literally on the verge of tears if you're the one in danger

If that happens, prepare to be snuggled for 3 days straight.

[rosenbergamot]

i like to think that theres just sometbing in the hermitcraft server code that transforms u into a hybrid. like. these were just regular ass humans before they started living there and by proximity the server has started to morph them into Something else. it started slowly at first in the earlier seasons and has only gotten more potent and effective as it goes on, almost as if its building and feeding off their energy.

and now doc is a. cyborg goat thing. rens a Dog. false and grian have bird wings. mumbo has shifted forms so many times that none of them can even tell if he was originally a human. cleo has become a FULL ON CORPSE. joe hills is a puppet now. like this is just normal for them. they just learn to live with it. these are permanent modifications made to their bodies and their minds and theyre all just like Yeah. Price i pay for being a hermit i guess XOXO

AND SOMETIMES IT CHANGES FROM SEASON TO SEASON (or from month to month, even) like joe wasnt a puppet last season but some force greater than him decided to yank his soul out of her body and now theyre a puppet. tango switched from blaze to Cold blaze and back to blaze between seasons. it FUCKED with him. imagine having ur core temperature shift so much like that. iskall rejoins and suddenly his bones are shifting all over again into a new form that the server has deemed is most appropriate for him this season. and its agonizing, sure, but its also like a 🙄🙄 eye roll moment bc we’ve been through this!!! god its like puberty all over again.

cub waking up one day and having to break the news to scar that hes no longer a vex . scar gets so sad he chews a hole through his base. jevin becoming less slimey and more solid and is so confused and uncertain about his entire life now because he cant fit in parts of his base when hes this solid. enderman mumbo who shifts and now no longer has a legitimate excuse to not make eye contact with people.

imagine being joel and skizz and talking to the past newcomers ab the weird stuff going on with ur body. skizz has noticed his shoulder blades have been aching recently, as if something underneath the skin is trying to pop out. joel has these weird growths on the top of his head. gem and pearl just laugh and go yeah man thats normal. shouldve been there when i became a weird alien thing last season lol.

theyre both just like ??? AND NOBODY WANTED TO TELL US ABOUT THIS???? to which all the other hermits shrug bc its such a widely accepted fact. its doing some cocomelon shit to their brain fr

[goferwashere]

PO!! Wii Boxers as Odetari Songs :3

Odetari brainrot foreverrrr

based entirely on vibes/sound. Not too many deep lyrics or explanations to be found here sorry y’all I just need to get this out of my system this is 4 fun

If u want deep analysis of lyrics tho go look to @/oohbuggypie bc omllll bro KNOWS how to dissect lyrics

Glass Joe - LOOK DONT TOUCH

- Bit of a more chill vibe, upbeat which I think makes sense for him

- also SCORPIO bc watch his title Defense fight with it playing the background and his idle syncs up up w the song perfectly

Von Kaiser - GET UP OFF ME

- I was fighting his TD when this came on

Disco Kid - THROAT GOAT

- So much of the vocals have such a teasing vibe to them idk… feels like disco

- Also less of a ‘dark’ sound to it?? Idk if that’s the right word but it’s less intense than some of his other stuff

King Hippo - I PEEP

- Relatively chill, idk how to explain it

Piston Hondo - I <3 LATINAS

- hunch

Bear Hugger - BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER

- GET THIS SHIT JUMPIN 🗣️💥

Great Tiger - DOUBLE TROUBLE

- come on now… the clones??? Double trouble??

- Also this instrumental is the best one you can’t argue with me bc I’m right.

- Very upbeat and fast yess..

Don Flamenco - LOVE POTION

- He’s a charmer fr

Aran Ryan - RED EYES BLACK DRAGON CHAIN

- idk

Soda Popinski - MUDDY CUP

- yeah

- Bro listening to this while watching him swing during his fight like u know he’d get down to this in the club

Bald Bull - DXE DXE DXE

- I do think he’s chill outside the ring, but that man has a crazy ass persona

Super Macho Man - 2 EASY

- 🤑

Mr. Sandman - GMFU

- boss ass song for a boss ass bitch

- He will get u FUCKED UP. (In the ring)

[justabackroundcharacter]

Thoughts while watching Wish:

- base princess personality trope

- Never getting over the face that the goat is named Valentino

- 7 dwarfs vibes with the friends

- Hans type character

- Weird ass love song to wishes

- Evil Chris Pratt went from 1-100 really fast

- The wife was 1000000% the kings wish and he used magic to get it

- Angry guy is played by GIZMO MY BELOVED

- 100 year old man move like a 60 year old fr

- Asha also goes from 50-100 real fast

- My favorite song was a little disappointing:(

- What she’s singing and what the animation gives dosent match

- Wifey is CLUELESS

- We could’ve had A STAR BOY INSTEAD WE GET THIS THING

- Star is still cute

- When you are a Star and accidentally make a devils trap in the tree lol

- IM A STAR ⭐️

- thanks for not eating me John

- Throwing books like your cramming for a test

- King is bipolar like actually tho

- EVERYTHING IS FINE

- What are you five ?

- DANCING CHICKENS

- Best friends help each other commit crimes against the kingdom

- King really is evil he made everyone go to an assembly and they aren’t even in school

- WAIT WAS KING SUPPOSED TO BE AN ALIEN

- how old is the king ? Do we know at all ?

- Casually dooms yourself to an eternity of pain because you got insecure

- HE HAS A SECRET LAIR LIKE HAWKMOTH

- ok how do wishes work again ? Was gramps not free to still inspire people

- Not the mom pleading for her daughter to only get her wish trampled on (definitely don’t need to look at how accurate that is)

- Star said SQUARE TF UP

- He’s literally just your king hit him with your bookshelf

- Returns to your stable if anyone asks pLaY dUmB

- when you have to speed run the 5 stages of grief bc you are the main character damnit

- I know what your thinking- WELL I DONT girl that star doesn’t have an expression on his face

- I can not swim *proceeds to jump into the water with reckless abandon *

- You’ve been hit by, you’ve been stuck by LOSS OF YOUR WISH

- ‘AMYIA darling your just in time come meet my new TOY’ why would you WRITE IT LIKE THAT

- Hot take anyone who calls their partner darling is on THIN FUCKING ICE

- King man went insane that is fun

- HANS KNOCK OFF BETRAYED THEM I FUCKING KNEW IT

- Dont worry im a talking mouse but very clean

- When you only want to be a loyal knight but you end up betraying your friends- happens to the best of us dude

- Good find Valentino - my butt found it

- introverts deserve sanctuary— louder for the people in the back

- STRIKE, STRIKE newsies vibes

- YES fulfill your Sabos wish

- doc and dopey slayed

- They all did

- They are like any queer friend group fr

- the chase scene is cool

- YAZ QUEEN GET YOUR HUSBAND

- I was fooled by the love I felt- Its ok queen you were definitely manipulated not your fault

- Don’t destroy never land you bastard

- A stick ? What am I supposed to do with this ?

- The MUSHROOMS 🍄

- Poor gizmo can’t catch a break no matter what universe he’s in

- a dress on a tree more likely than you think

- Dude bro dear got into the mushrooms fr

- Sometimes a plan is just you and your six friends jumping from a high place

- FUCKING HANS GOT ME AGAIN

- thanks John

- Your so right bunnies are terrifying

- Nope nope nope nope nope

- StAr GeT aWaY fRoM tHeRe

- WAIT IS HE MAGIC MIRRIR GUY

- Yay singing again

- THE power of collective singing will always save the day

- GREEN SMOKE

- MyWiShEs dude get a grip

- Simon and queen should be besties now

- LONG LIVE THE QUEEN

- Peter Pan origin story 👀👀

- ZOOTOPIA ?!?

- bippty boppty boo the magic wand is fixed

- Give GIZMO THE WAND 😭he deserves it

- Fireworks yay

- 5/10 movie

[isa-ghost]

"also a lot of people who don't get this are tubblings. which is a whole can of worms. but I've been in the trenches........... ive s e e n." Isa, my gosh, I've seen some hell as a fellow Tubbling and sometimes crow. It's when people say "Chayannne should ignore phil and hang out with Tubbo more to feel better," that has driven me up the wall in these conversations. Not only at that point is this some sort of weird projection thing they've got going on, but it also make it clear how little they know or really care about Chayanne. bc Chayanne does need emotional support, and I feel like ANY q!tubbo knows that Chayanne AIN'T getting that from him. he gets to just chill with Tubbo, sure, but to say Tubbo should basically replace Phil shows a complete lack of understanding Chayanne and the entirety of the Death family. it just feels really.... ick

REEEAAAALLLLLL EVERYTHING YOU JUST SAID IS BASED AND TRUE.

I'm the reverse of you, a Crow and sometimes Tubbling (I've watched them both 4+ years tho).

And not only that!!! It's a complete mischaracterization of qTubbo too!!!! Don't even get me STARTED. That man is here to vibe and roll with the punches. He handles things very dryly and copes with humor. That is NOT what Chayanne needs!! They're not only ignoring Chayanne's characterization, they're blatantly disregarding what they KNOW about qTubbo because they watch fucking him!!!! Dare I say out of spite, purely because they hate Phil that much. They did the same shit with Leo and Foolish before Town of Fobo. It's two faced as hell.

And I'm too hated by a little cluster of Tubblings here on Tumblr to even bother saying much else about the way they all horrifically mischaracterize qTubbo bc I don't want that drama. 😭 But omg they butcher that man AND Phil, because they hate Phil. It's wild. Like are we watching the same stream??? Be so fr.

One thing I will sa is that my friends and I kinda realized the age difference has a huge influence on it all. They think Phil's "old" so he should have the perfect solution every time all the time. Whereas they can't stop infantalizing and babying Tubbo to save their fucking life so he's "trying his best" or whatever. It's tiring. Treat that fucking 20 year old like a 20 year old!!! He's not your little uwu cozy snowy town goat boy teenager from dsmp anymore!!!

And dare I touch the hornet's nest of A Lot Of Their Babying is because of Tubbo's neurodivergence in & out of rp, and his in-rp trauma. The infantalization and woobification of nd people and people with trauma in fandom. But what else is new, let's be honest.

[mioakem]

Ranking gen 1 boys based on looks alone 🤪

Owen- self explanatory 🤷‍♀️, probably smells bad too

Ezekiel- I know damn well he smells disgusting and has dandruff under that hat, and he’s short

Trent- if his head wasn’t so damn long he would be higher

Noah- short and his head is so damn big and for what 😭

Cody- also short but at least he has a normal sized head

Harold- probably smells bad and I’m not a fan of the stubble

Geoff- ok crimson chin

Tyler- I love him sm but he lowkey looks like a goat

Duncan- would be way higher if he wasn’t built like a wiener dog

Justin- also self explanatory, just wish his chin wasn’t so big 😔

Dj- my type fr

Alejandro- literally my man

[sherbovania]

every bayonetta angel and demon, ranked best to worst

(in my based and platinumpilled opinion. only including bayo 1/2 appearances for simplicity)

grace and glory. they are my friends :D

alraune. one of the most fun fights in 2 if i’m being honest

fortitudo. goated recurring boss PLUS his fight is the first chapter that i pure platinum’d in bayo 1 :]

beloved. never once let me down

glamor. blinged tf out ice on his wrists

phantasmaraneae. i like when he go boom

affinity. i think they would be excellent marketable plushies. special shoutout to the trumpet affinities they mean everything to me

applaud. like affinity but taller. they make easy combo fodder and for that i thank them for their service o7

braves. what if beloved was small and T-posed on you in groups of 3

temperantia. concrete man take me by the hand

jubileus. woman :D

urbane and gravitas. This Is A Certified Bayonetta 2 Classic

joy. very fun anywhere that isn’t infinite climax difficulty. things start to get less fun there

greed. pupy :] he shoot fire and ice

fearless and fairness. kind of the same deal as greed but sometimes fearless will snipe me across the field and i don’t like that

valiance. Another Certified Bayonetta 2 Classic

iustitia. funny meatball

ardor. movin and groovin on my ass

inspired. i shoot him once and he dramatically goes completely limp and i think that’s funny

insidious. automatically cool bc he’s a manta ray

gracious and glorious. still my friends but they won’t let me witch time their attacks anymore :(

gomorrah. automatically lower on the list bc he kills jeanne like 5 seconds before you face him

sapientia. my least favorite of the original boss fights but i still like him

pain. he’s neat

pride. pain 2

irenic. that is a car

valor. hard to time his hits sometimes

fury. he’s just a little guyyyyyyy he’s just a little birdie

cachet and compassion. how are they that small swinging blades like that

dear and decorations. the childlike voice from decorations kinda freaks me out. otherwise laughably weak

acceptance. what if affinity was a horse

accolade. what if applaud was a horse

enchant. kind of a nothingburger enemy but also kinda lame

hideous. kinda finicky

hatred. keeps blocking my shit and resetting my combos

enrapture. lame asf for stealing all my hard earned magic

belief. he just kind of unnerves me

kinship. sometimes fires missiles i can’t see coming. puts the L in angel

worship. tedious to fight and will make me catch strays even though i swear i dodged fr fr

resplendence. we don’t ever actually fight him so he doesn’t count (i think he looks kinda neat though)

malicious. annoying

resentment. GRAAHHHHHHH (shoots my de-aging beam and kills you instantly). also ugly

sloth. what the fuck. why

fidelity. stop dropping landmines and start killing yourself

harmony. get the fuck down from there stop shooting at me

allegiance. fuck you for blocking midair kill yourself

if i missed any: no i didn't <3

[zyafics]

i’m breaking my rafe-only content blog for u elle i hope u know how much i love u 🌷🙂‍↕️ ⬇️

“Do you think my hair will get just as luscious as yours did after you got back from Winterfell?”

no fr how is he serving face every episode of s2

Luke didn’t, which was why he was so antsy to get there and almost didn’t pack the fur lined gloves their mother had laid out for them.

glad to know the universal lack of appreciation for mothers telling u to wear a coat is seen in game of thrones’ dragon fantasy

“Nyke ivestretan zirȳla, paktot Vermax?” Jacaerys whispered to his dragon, stroking Vermax’ neck with his gloved hand and the creature let out a puff of smoke. I warned him, didn’t I Vermax?

do u google translate this or do u know high valyarian (is that how u spell it?)

“Ah, the infamous Prince Lucerys,” Cregan said with a smile, shaking Luke’s hand. Based on his face, Jacaerys could tell his brother was struggling to keep a straight face; Cregan’s handshakes were nothing but firm.

baby boy lukie ur aliveee 🥹🥹🥹🌷

“Ten and eight, my lord. And please, call me Luke.”

bro what does that mean r u eighteen

Jacaerys almost tuned out Cregan’s voice as he introduced you, but it was like your name was ringing in his ears. He was sure he had never been quite taken with any lady as with you right from the first meeting. Jacaerys cleared his throat, hoping his voice would come out even.

i feel like i’m being introduced like i’m in bridgerton

His eyes lingered on your slender fingers for longer than they should have.

bro have u ever had a woman’s touch

The way you accentuated the honorific had Jacaerys sweat, something he never thought he’d do in Winterfell.

this man has, in fact, never met a woman

He wondered if all women from your land looked like you or if it was just you that had him so enthralled

why r u thinking of other women 🤨

He couldn’t even understand what it was about you that had him so shaken to the core. Jacaerys had never been the kind of man who stuttered around when it came to women. He knew what he had to offer, he knew a lot of women found his status appealing.

“who stuttered around when it came to women” bro ur giving mr darcy energy from pride n prejudice

But something about you was just…. Infuriating. It made him lose his footing.

yo what did i do

“What did you think of her friend?” Luke finally asked and Jacaerys rolled his eyes. There it was. “She’s pretty, right? I think she might be interested in me.”

no i am 20 that’s illegal / no thank u

“Exactly. She makes you shiver in your boots like a child and swallow your words like Vermax does goats.”

👢 👢👢

“You can refer to me as anything you want,” Jacaerys said quickly. Too quickly.

it’s like his first crush hehe

“I wouldn’t want to seem disrespectful,” you added. “Folks are already whispering about the “foreign lady”, I do not wish to give them more reason to be suspicious.”

YO-

A corner of your mouth tugged up in a grin. “You wish to be close with me?”

omg i’m such a flirt 🙂‍↕️🌷

“And who is going to tame that one wild curl that always does whatever it wants at the back of your head?”

they r so brothers-coded we were ROBBED in the show (i haven’t watched a single episode)

“These are usually my chambers I stay in when I visit Winterfell,” you said nonchalantly, taking in the chambers and Jacaerys’ possessions that laid scattered around. “You can imagine my surprise when Cregan told me it was occupied for someone else when I arrived.”

this would’ve started our enemies to lovers storyline 😠

Your mouth quirked up in a smirk and you brushed your hair back with a flick. “I must say, I have to admit that I thought you less nervous when no one was around.”

omg i’m such a flirtttt

“You make me nervous because I do not know how to act around you. You make me stutter, lose my footing. I was never anything less than charming when it comes to talking to ladies, but you for some reason…”

i call bs 😐

Jacaerys dared to glance at you, swallowing thickly when he realized that you had come closer, his eyes roaming over your exposed skin. He exhaled sharply, feeling his cock stirring in his breeches, thankful that his tunic was untucked, covering his excitement.

BREECHES TOOK ME OUT 😭😭😭☄️ i’m crying

“You don’t even know the affect you have on me… You had me on my knees,” he murmured, pushing your gown up. “I’m the crown prince of the seven realms. I don’t kneel for anyone.”

oh this line EATS

“I will die an immediate death if I don’t,” you said, extremely serious. “Lay back.”

damn i am dickmatized

“I really enjoyed your company,” you then said, your voice a bittersweet tone. Jacaerys pressed his nose against your neck, biting back the question if you wanted to come with him, see King’s Landing. He knew he was being foolish.

and he is pussywhipped goodnight 😴

final thoughts — i had so much fun reading this. it’s fun navigating this new fandom even though i know next to nothing except for snippets off of tiktok. also.. the language is so different and i love how u cater ur writing style to the fandom you’re writing in (obx feeling more modern versus this one is more eloquent + medieval). also some of the words choices took me OUT���nothing on ur writing, but because i giggle when i read stuff like breeches hehe (7 year old boy mentally fr). anyways, i love love LOVE the dynamic you’ve written for jace + luke, like that was the spotlight for me. they’re so BROTHERS with that dynamic and it’s devastating we’ll never have that experience in hotd. also. baela who? 🤭

and i burn for you (and you don’t even know my name) | j.v

summary:

“Something like that, “ you sighed, eyeing him briefly. Jacaerys tried not to flinch at the clear rejection and pressed his lips together.

“I should leave-”

“No, please, don’t leave on my behalf…. My prince.”

OR; Jacaerys doesn’t quite know how to behave himself around you

pairing: jacaerys velaryon x reader

warnings: 18+, MDI, doesn't follow canon, Jace has been aged up to 20!

word count: 7,5k words (oh)

author's note: this is very much is an indulgent story bc i miss Luke and Jace🥲 also inspired by close to you by gracie abrams ! pls let me know ALLL YOUR THOUGHTS!!!🫶🏼

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“Do you think my hair will get just as luscious as yours did after you got back from Winterfell?”

Jacaerys’ rolled his eyes at his brother. They were on their second day of journey from King’s Landing to Winterfell. It was to be Cregan Stark’s name day and he had cordially invited Jacaerys and his family to the celebrations. His mother could not just leave her throne at King’s Landing, and Daemon wouldn’t go without her. Joffrey, Viserys and Aegon where still too young to go, so only Jacaerys and Luke rode to Winterfell on dragonback. They could’ve made it in one day if they had wanted to, but they were in no hurry. Well, Jacaerys wasn’t. He knew what temperatures were expecting him. Luke didn’t, which was why he was so antsy to get there and almost didn’t pack the fur lined gloves their mother had laid out for them. Jacaerys couldn’t wait until the biting, cold winds hit Luke’s face for the first time. He would treasure the memory forever.

“Har har, good one,” Jacaerys said dryly. “The court jester should watch out or you will be going for his position in no time.”

Luke grinned at his older brother wickedly, opening his mouth once more to say another jest, Jacaerys had no doubt about it, but the words died on Luke’s tongue when the winds suddenly turned cold, whipping his hair around like icicles.

“Seven hells!” he cursed and Arrax let out a soft whine, not used to the coldness, just like his rider.

“Nyke ivestretan zirȳla, paktot Vermax?” Jacaerys whispered to his dragon, stroking Vermax’ neck with his gloved hand and the creature let out a puff of smoke. I warned him, didn’t I Vermax?

It wasn’t much longer until the two brothers reached Winterfell, their dragons landing just in front of the gates of town. Jacaerys could already see Cregan’s imposing figure standing by the gate as he climbed off of Vermax, carefully patting his snout. He took the bags off his saddle, Lucerys doing the same before leaning his forehead against Vermax’.

“Sȳz valonqar. Umbagon va, ao rȳbagon issa? Se jurnegon hen syt Arrax” Good boy. Stay near, you hear me? And take care of Arrax.

Vermax let out a soft rumble, pressing his snout against Jacaerys’ hand, before he and Arrax leapt back in the air, disappearing across the woods with few wing flaps. Jacaerys wasn’t sure where exactly they went, but he assumed it was some warm cave. Winterfell didn’t exactly have a dragon pit.

“Woah,” Luke gasped, astounded by the amount of white surrounding them.

“I told you,” Jacaerys said, shouldering his bags as Cregan approached them, several pages in tow.

“Prince Jacaerys!” Cregan’s voice boomed across the snowy field, before he stopped in front of the two princes. “What an honor to have you.”

The two men sized each other up, before breaking out in laughter as Cregan pulled Jacaerys into a hug.

“It is good to see you, my friend.”

“And you, Cregan,” Jacaerys replied, patting Cregan’s back that was cloaked in a warm fur. He really ought to ask him what animal pelt it was, he never seemed to be cold. Luke was shifting on his feet next to him and Jacaerys took a step back to introduce his brother.

“Lord Cregan, this is my brother.”

“Ah, the infamous Prince Lucerys,” Cregan said with a smile, shaking Luke’s hand. Based on his face, Jacaerys could tell his brother was struggling to keep a straight face; Cregan’s handshakes were nothing but firm.

“Lord Cregan, it is an honor to finally make your acquaintance.”

“I have heard much about you.”

“Ah,” Luke sighed, hand still enclasped in Cregan’s. “I’m sure all lies.”

“Only good things, your brother has shared high praises of you.”

Luke glanced over to his brother in surprise and Jacaerys only raised his eyebrows at him. Cregan finally let go of Luke’s hand, clapping him on the shoulder, sending the younger man nearly flying.

“How old are you, Lucerys?”

“Ten and eight, my lord. And please, call me Luke.”

“Very well,” Cregan said with a grin. “You’re the prime age of a young prince, Luke. Are you courting anyone?”

“No,” Luke replied, his cheeks reddening. Jacaerys only snickered, ignoring the deathly glare his younger brother sent him.

“No worry. There are a few of very beautiful ladies that will be attending, maybe one or two will catch your royal eyes.”

Cregan gave Jacaerys a knowing look, but he only rolled his eyes, stretching his hands, the coldness starting to seep into his gloves.

“I am about to lose feeling in my limbs, can we continue this dreadful conversation inside?”

“Of course. I apologize, I forget that you are not accustomed to our weather,” Cregan said, motioning for the pages to help the them with their bags. “Let’s get you into the warm, shall we?”

Cregan lead the two brothers towards the Great Keeps, giving Luke a very brief rundown of the grounds as he did. Jacaerys could already feel his fingers warming up; he even dared to take off his gloves.

“We are currently having tea, I would love for you to join but if you wish to get some rest, we can meet again after,” Cregan said, stopping in front of the dining halls.

Jacaerys glanced over to Luke, who only gave him a shrug. “I could do with some food.”

“As do I.”

“Very well.”

Cregan pushed open the door to reveal a lively dining hall, one that Jacaerys was familiar with. He spotted faces he recognized, when his eyes stopped in the middle of the table, surprised to see Lady Alysanne Blackwood sitting next to you, someone he didn’t recognize. Immediately, you turned your head to look at him, as if you had felt his eyes on you. Jacaerys tried not to falter under your gaze.

“Who’s that?” Luke whispered and Jacaerys fought the urge to elbow him.

“The Princes Jacaerys and Lucerys Velaryon!” Cregan announced, causing a ruckus as everyone pushed their chair back to stand. You only followed after Alysanne gently nudged you, folding your hands in front.

“Thank you for having us,” Jacaerys said, him and Lucerys both bowing. “Please, sit.”

As everyone took their seats again, Cregan led him and Luke to the middle of the table, where three seats were empty next to Alysanne and you.

“My princes, may I introduce Lady Alysanne of House Blackwood and Lady-”

Jacaerys almost tuned out Cregan’s voice as he introduced you, but it was like your name was ringing in his ears. He was sure he had never been quite taken with any lady as with you right from the first meeting. Jacaerys cleared his throat, hoping his voice would come out even.

“Lady Alysanne, it’s nice to see you again,” Jacaerys said, bowing to her as Luke followed suit.

“The pleasure is mine, your graces. I hope your journey was swift,” Alysanne replied. “I hear you travelled on dragonback.”

That seemed to pique your interest as you straightened your back, eying Jacaerys with a new found interest. Jacaerys tried to ignore the heat unfurling in his lower stomach. He had seemed to take beat too long to reply, because Luke cut in, throwing a look at his older brother.

“Yes, my lady. It only took us a day and half’s journey.”

“Ah, I envy you. To travel on dragonback and have a short journey. It took me a moon’s turn to get from Raventree Hall to Winterfell,” Alysanne said with a small sigh, turning to you. “Nearly took you two moon’s turns, didn’t it?”

Jacaerys had kept his eyes steadfastly on Alysanne as she spoke, but when she turned to you, he took the chance to do the same. You nodded, fingers between the stem of the chalice you had been drinking from. His eyes lingered on your slender fingers for longer than they should have.

“Two moon’s turns is quite a long journey,” Jacaerys finally pressed out, hoping his voice didn’t sound odd. “Where in the Seven Kingdoms does your house lay?”

Your eyes met his for the first time and Jacaerys felt like he was looking in the eyes of a predator, as if he hadn’t been riding a dragon for nearly all of his life.

“I am from a land beyond Essos,” you finally spoke, voice as smooth as honey. Before you could continue, Alysanne whispered something under her breath and you let out a small laugh, shaking your pretty head, speaking again. “I’m afraid we’re not part of the Seven Kingdoms, *your grace*.”

The way you accentuated the honorific had Jacaerys sweat, something he never thought he’d do in Winterfell. He managed to give you a wry smile; luckily, Cregan finally gestured towards the empty seats and as Jacaerys sat down - two seats away from you - he let out a breath of relief, desperate for a quick respite. His behavior was mortifying and unbefitting for a crown prince.

“Are you alright?” Luke whispered from his left as he reached for a particularly large meat pie. “It is unlike you to let me do the talking.”

Jacaerys waited as the butler poured him some mulled wine, only stopping him when it was nearly full to the brim. He lifted the chalice, taking a big drink from it, feeling Luke’s eyes on him the whole time.

“It appears the journey has tired me more than I had expected.”

Luke narrowed his eyes at him, but as soon as he bit into the meat pie, the suspicions slid of his face.

“Seven hells, what kind of meat do they put in these?” he almost moaned, already reaching for another. Slob, Jacaerys thought, reaching for some bread himself, leaving his brother to his own world as he discovered the cuisine of the North. Jacaerys glanced over to his friend, but Cregan was in the middle of a conversation with Alysanne; they were speaking in hushed tones, Jacaerys could barely make out a word even though he was sitting right next to them.

The way Cregan was whispering to Alysanne suggested a certain familiarity; a familiarity that Jacaerys was surprised by; he hadn’t known that Cregan had taken on a lover, and Alysanne no less, though he could see what had drawn his friend to her.

Jacaerys didn’t pay attention for half a second before his eyes impulsively laid on you. He didn’t want to be caught staring, but you seemed preoccupied listening to Alysanne as she talked, so he allowed himself a few moments to take you in. Your hair fell over your shoulder in soft waves, the bodice of your dress was snug around your chest. The more he looked, the dryer his throat became, suddenly the bread in his mouth tasted days old. Letting out a soft cough, Jacaerys reached for his wine, nearly finishing all of it in one to, desperate to quench his thirst.

He wondered if all women from your land looked like you or if it was just you that had him so enthralled. Jacaerys was lost in thoughts so deeply, he didn’t even realize that Cregan had turned his attention to him.

“Did someone catch your eye?”

“What?”

Jacaerys teared his eyes from you to look at his friend, who was sipping on his wine, eyebrows raised. Despite trying to seem nonchalant, the crown prince knew a pink flush creeped on his cheeks; he’d blame it on the wine if Cregan would ask.

“I was enjoying the festivities.”

“You’re surely enjoying something.”

“I’m positively not enjoying this conversation,” Jacaerys sniffed. Cregan laughed, placing his heavy hand on his shoulder. Jacaerys tried not to falter under it.

“I like her. She’s a good friend of Lady Alysanne’s. Though if her behavior grates you: her land does not have a king or queen, so she might not be familiar with our customs. She is also especially forward; I fear that was a given, considering the company she seeks.”

Jacaerys knew immediately what Cregan was alluding to. Alysanne had a reputation for not holding her tongue when something displeased her, there were a good handful of people who quite dislike her for it.

“I’m sure you will get along with her fine, my prince.”

Jacaerys hummed, glancing over to you for a split second before looking away for fear of being caught again, but in doing so, he missed you looking back at him with raised brows. After the table was cleared, you and Alysanne excused yourselves to your chambers. Jacaerys stared after you until you disappeared from sight, his hands clasped.

“Let me show you to your chambers for some rest,” Cregan offered. “Jacaerys, I had the same chambers prepared as last time.”

The three men walked through the hallways of Winterfell once more, stopping in front of Jacaerys’ chambers.

“Someone will fetch you for supper, please get some rest in the meantime,” Cregan said, clasping Jacaerys on the back. Jacaerys glanced over at Luke, who waved him off, so he entered his chambers as Cregan walked Luke to his, with the latter chattering excitedly.

As the door shut behind Jacaerys, the chambers were engulfed in silence and he was finally able to breathe. The room was comfortably decorated, of course in no way as lavish as his chambers in King’s Landing, but everything he would need was there. Taking off his cloak and his doublet, Jacaerys hung them over the small bench that sat near the fire, before he laid down on the bed, staring up the canopy with a sigh.

Gods, he really needed to get it together. He would not allow himself to act like such a fool in front of you again. He couldn’t even understand what it was about you that had him so shaken to the core. Jacaerys had never been the kind of man who stuttered around when it came to women. He knew what he had to offer, he knew a lot of women found his status appealing. But something about you was just…. Infuriating. It made him lose his footing.

Jacaerys was still questioning his life choices that led to this moment, when the door suddenly flung open, and he knew immediately who it was without having to move; there was only one person in whole Winterfell who would barge into his chambers like this.

“Your chambers are so much nicer than mine!” Luke crowed, throwing his hands up in the air before he dropped onto the bed next to Jacaerys. “I do have to say, even though it is freezing outside, the Northeners know how to keep it comfy in their chambers.”

Jacaerys let out a small sigh.

“What are you doing here, Luke?”

“Gods, why are you such in a sour mood?”

“Maybe because I am tired from the journey and you’re sitting here talking about meaningless things,” Jacaerys lamented with a pointed look in his younger brother’s direction, who only pursed his lips, his eyes sparkling with mischief.

“Let me move onto meaningful topics then,” he agreed. “You didn’t tell me Lord Cregan is betrothed to Lady Alysanne.”

“He’s not, as far as I know,” Jacaerys replied, resigning himself to the fact that Luke wasn’t going to leave anytime soon. “I was taken by surprise just as you were.”

Luke didn’t answer; for a brief second Jacaerys wondered if he had fallen asleep, and he wasn’t sure if he’d be happy about or not.

“What did you think of her friend?” Luke finally asked and Jacaerys rolled his eyes. There it was. “She’s pretty, right? I think she might be interested in me.”

“What makes you think she would be interested in you?” Jacaerys pressed out, annoyed. He knew Luke was baiting him, but what if he wasn’t? His younger brother turned over to look at him, the corners of his mouth tugging up.

“I knew it. You’re absolutely smitten with her.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I barely exchanged two words with her,” Jacaerys said defensively.

“Exactly. She makes you shiver in your boots like a child and swallow your words like Vermax does goats.”

“Blasphemous,” Jacaerys snapped, his cheeks growing hot. “I’m the Crown Prince of the Seven Realms, I do not get flustered around a lady.”

“I cannot wait until you talk to her again,” Luke remarked gleefully.

Jacaerys reached over to grab one of the fluffy pillows that was resting against the headboard to whack Luke in the face with it.

The next day, Jacaerys found himself with some time by himself. Cregan was greeting some more of the guests that were arriving for his celebration that evening, and Luke had wanted to see the training grounds of Winterfell, so Jacaerys ventured out by himself, walking the walls. He passed a few guards, who bowed respectfully as they marched past him. They asked if he got lost, if they should walk him back inside where it was warm, but he declined.

Despite the cold snow that was falling from the sky, Jacaerys enjoyed leaving the castle for a few moments. Winterfell was peaceful, the white that covered the grounds allowed him to breathe, a stark contrast to the grounds of King’s Landing. As the cold winds started to pick up, Jacaerys turned to head back, but he stopped in his tracks when he saw you standing by yourself at the wall, staring out at the distance. Jacaerys hesitated.

His interaction with you last night at supper was… Passable. He had managed to keep the conversation going, he still wasn't happy with himself. But this was unfamiliar territory, he hadn’t ever been alone with you. What if he made a fool of himself?

Before Jacaerys could decide what to do, his feet already carried him over to you. At the sounds of the snow crunching under his soled shoes, you turned around, your eyebrows risen in surprise. Your cheeks were red from the cold, despite the fur-lined cloak that engulfed your shoulders.

“Oh, it’s you,” you said, your breath visible in the cold air.

“Only me,” Jacaerys confirmed, bowing his head slightly in greeting. You did the same. “Come out here for some quiet?”

“Something like that, “ you sighed, eyeing him briefly. Jacaerys tried not to flinch at the clear rejection and pressed his lips together.

“I should leave-”

“No, please, don’t leave on my behalf…. My prince.”

You added the honorific after a brief pause, and Jacaerys stayed rooted in his spot. You seemed like you were in deep thought, and your voice was hesitant when you spoke again.

“I am unsure as to what the difference is, if I’m being quite honest. Do you want me to refer to you as my prince or as your Grace?”

“You can refer to me as anything you want,” Jacaerys said quickly. Too quickly.

The frown on your face smoothed, a grin growing in its stead. “Indeed?”

“I meant,” Jacaerys pressed, trying to sustain any sort of dignity. “You’re not from Westeros, you do not need to address me as your Grace or my prince.”

“I wouldn’t want to seem disrespectful,” you added. “Folks are already whispering about the “foreign lady”, I do not wish to give them more reason to be suspicious.”

Jacaerys felt a flash of hot anger coursing through him at the belief of anyone uttering a bad word about you.

“Are you being mistreated, my lady?”

A laugh escaped your lips. “I did not tell for you to fight in my honor, I have endured worse than some meaningless gossip.”

You tossed your hair back, and for a brief second, your scent carried over to Jacaerys’ nose. You smelled… Sweet. A scent that was unfamiliar to him, but not exactly unwelcome. With a small sigh, you turned your head to look at him. Damn it, did you say something?

“So... Your grace or my prince?”

For some reason, either address didn’t feel right. Well. They felt right, but not right. Never before had Jacaerys felt anything when being referred to with the correct title except for a sense of respect and pride that he was being recognized for his status. But for some reason, having you address him with either had Jacaerys feel things in regions where he shouldn’t. And both seem equally catastrophic.

“Either is fine,” he finally settled on. “But if no one is around… It is alright for you to call me by my given name.”

“Jacaerys?”

A shiver ran down his spine at the sound of his name rolling of your tongue so easily. He was done for. No matter what you referred to him as, it made him weak in the knees.

“Or Jace.”

“Is that not improper?” you asked. “I would hate for folks to think I’m getting too familiar with the crown prince.”

He definitely wouldn’t mind getting too familiar with you.

“My friends call me that… And people that I’m close with.”

A corner of your mouth tugged up in a grin. “You wish to be close with me?”

Jacaerys flushed, stuttering. “I-“

“I’m only jesting,” you said, your gloved hand reaching out to touch his arm and even though there were about five layers between, Jacaerys could *feel* your skin on his. He was in trouble. “I will address you properly in public but if no one is around, Jacaerys….”

Your voice trailed off and you took a step towards him, leaning in so you could speak to him in a small whisper.

“I hope we can become friends.”

With that, you bowed your head, stepping back and turned to depart, leaving Jacaerys standing by himself. He exhaled a breath - a breath he had not realized he had been holding this whole time.

Somewhere in the distance, Jacaerys could hear Vermax screech out, no doubtedly feeling exactly what his dragon rider was struggling with.

“Yes, Vermax, you and me both,” Jacaerys muttered with a small sigh, enduring the cold for a little while longer before he retired inside, knowing he had to start getting ready for Cregan’s celebrations soon.

“How much longer are you going to stare at your reflection?”

Jacaerys resisted the impulse to roll his eyes. He was tense enough as it was, giving into Luke’s teasing was not going to help it.

“I’m representing mother at this celebration, a single hair out of place and rumors about my legitimacy as heir might start,” Jacaerys pointed out, wiping off the fleck of dusts that sat on the shoulder of his doublet.

“Of course, we would not want that,” Luke said, his voice taking that annoying tone which Jacaerys knew meant he wasn’t taking him serious. “You are most certainly not trying to look absolutely perfect for a certain lady.”

Jacaerys met Luke’s eyes through the mirror, his forehead creased. “I did not ask you to wait for me. No one is stopping you from going by yourself.”

Luke sighed, pushing himself off of the bench to approach him, hands reaching out to smooth out Jacaerys’ cloak.

“And who is going to tame that one wild curl that always does whatever it wants at the back of your head?”

Jacaerys winced when Luke gently tugged on said curl, setting it in its place, before the younger prince grinned at him through the reflection as the two of them stood in front of the mirror, Luke's shoulders slightly higher than Jacaerys'. He despised the fact that his younger brother was starting to overtake him in height. Jacaerys hoped that Joffrey would stay shorter than him.

“You look fine, Jace,” Luke assured him. “And even if a hair might be out of place, she will think it charming.”

Jacaerys decided against deeming that comment with an answer, instead straightening his shoulders.

“Let’s go then.”

The two brothers headed the the Great Hall and the closer they got, the louder the music became. Jacaerys tried not to pick on his clothes as they walked through the hallways, knowing he was just being antsy at this point. When they finally reached the threshold of the hall, the herald bowed to them both respectfully, waiting until the music quietened down, the guests looking at them.

“Presenting His Grace, Prince Jacaerys Velaryon, heir to the Iron Throne, and his brother, Prince Lucerys Velaryon of House Targaryen!” the herald announced.

The guests all bowed, which Jacaerys and Lukereturned, before they were being led to their seats and Jacaerys tried not to stumble over his feet when he realized that Cregan had sat Luke to his right, whereas Jacaerys sat next to him.

Right next to you.

Jacaerys ignored Luke’s smirk as he sat down, and instead offered you a small smile.

“My lady.”

“Your grace.”

You sent him a conspiratorial smile, before your attention refocused to Cregan, who suddenly stood, lifting his chalice.

"Good evening, my dear guests. On this occasion, the celebration of my name day, I am deeply honored to be surrounded by such loyal friends, family, and allies. I thank everyone who made their long and burdensome journey to celebrate this day with me. Raise your cups, my friends, enjoy the festivities, the music and most importantly, the food. Now, let the feast begin!"

Everyone clapped as Cregan took his seat again, the lively music beginning to play. Immediately, people rose to occupy the dancefloor. You stayed seated, sipping on your wine and Jacaerys watched you out of the corner of his eye, reaching for his own wine, hoping it would ease his nerves. You looked pretty; wearing a dark red dress, the fabric seeming to melt against your skin like it was sown onto your body. Jacaerys tried to not let his gaze linger too much on your cleavage, which was tasteful, but still incredibly distracting. He couldn’t help but think how you and him seemed to be dressed to compliment each other.

“You look very beautiful,” Jacaerys blurted out. You turned to him, eyebrows risen in surprise and his cheeks reddened. “I apologize if it was too forward, I-”

“You look very handsome yourself,” you said, returning the favor with a grin. “At least I know what took you so long to get here.”

By now, Jacaerys was sure that the color of his face rivaled the color of your dress.

“Thank you,” he said, fingers tracing the stem of the chalice. “I try to look my best.”

“It is working in your favor, my prince,” you all but purred quietly, making Jacaerys grip his chalice so tightly, his knuckles turned white.

“Are you alright?”

“Fine,” Jacaerys pressed out, letting a small sigh pass his lips. “I apologize. I am usually more… Composed,” he admitted. You raised an eyebrow at him, but he couldn’t help but feel like you were biting back a smile.

“And you’re not composed right now?”

“No. You…” he paused, letting go of the chalice, stretching his hand out. “You make me nervous.”

He dared to look up to you, searching for any sign of distaste, only to see your gaze focused on his hands, before you lifted your eyes to meet his.

“How?”

“You vex me.”

“In a good way, I hope.”

Jacaerys let out a breathless laughter, shaking his head. “In a very much not good way. This is not behavior befit for a crown prince.”

“Well, it’s just your luck that I have not a single idea of what behavior is befit for a crown prince,” you assured him, placing your hand on his, presumably to console him. It had quite the opposite reaction. “It is just me, you may speak freely.”

“I-” Jacaerys paused, his eyes darting around the countless of guests mingling in the Great Hall, the threat of a listening ear everywhere. “I cannot.”

You nodded in understanding, but Jacaerys could tell that his answer had disappointed you by the way you turned your head away from him. Silently, he cursed himself, feeling the desire for you coiling in his stomach, but unable to act on it.

For the rest of the night, Jacaerys tried to pick up the conversation with you again, and while you did speak with him, it seemed dull, like you were uninterested. He felt incredibly stupid, knowing he had messed up, but despite that, he couldn’t jump over his shadow to address the problem. So he didn’t. He pushed his disappointment in himself aside and tried his best to control the jealousy he felt whenever you accepted the dance of another man, acting like didn’t care at all, especially when Luke was watching, shaking his head.

Cregan was luckily too busy to entertain his guests to meddle, occasionally drawing Jacaerys into his side to clink their cups. Overall, (despite his personal failings) the celebration was a success. It was late in the night, nearing the hour of the wolf when Jacaerys finally retired to his chambers. He had dropped Luke off at his own chambers just before, his younger brother having one too many of the mulled wine and immediately dozing off in clothes.

Shutting the door with his foot, Jacaerys unpinned his cloak, tugging his doublet off, draping it over the small ottoman. His hands were in the collar of his tunic, ready to take it off when short raps on his door made him pause. Was that Cregan fetching him for another drink?

Jacaerys opened the door and his eyebrows rising in surprise when he saw who it was.

“My lady…”

You were standing in front of him, dark cloak slung around your shoulders, about the last person he had expected to come knocking on his door after his last conversation with you had gone. Your face was bare from any trace of cosmetics, but your cheeks still held a rosy glow. Jacaerys peered out into the dark hallway, expecting a handmaiden or anyone accompanying you, but alas, you were by yourself.

“It is late. Is something the matter?” he asked, concerned.

“Everything is fine,” you assured him. “I was feeling a bit restless, I was wondering if you were up for some company?”

Despite feeling exhausted just a few seconds ago, Jacaerys was wide awake now, his heart thrumming with excitement at the prospect of spending time with you alone. But he couldn’t help but hesitate, questioning whether it was smart of him to put himself in a situation he couldn’t control, especially with you.

You sensed his hesitation, tilting your head curiously.

“I can leave, if you wish.”

Before you could even attempt to retreat, Jacaerys’ hand shot out to stop you, and as he saw the amusement on your face, he knew you had never intended to leave.

Minx, he thought to himself, opening his door wider to let you inside. Swiftly, you passed by him and Jacaerys made sure no one saw you enter, before shutting the door. As he turned around, he found you had already settled on the cushioned couch, appearing comfortably at ease.

“These are usually my chambers I stay in when I visit Winterfell,” you said nonchalantly, taking in the chambers and Jacaerys’ possessions that laid scattered around. “You can imagine my surprise when Cregan told me it was occupied for someone else when I arrived.”

Jacaerys tried not to imagine you laying in his bed as he sat down on the bench.

“They are the chambers I stayed in when I visited last time. I assume Cregan wanted me to feel comfortable.”

“The lengths we would go to to make sure you felt comfortable,” you said with a look in his direction and Jacaerys flushed, clearing his throat.

“Do you like these chambers for a reason or are you merely a creature of habit?”

“These are the only chambers that don’t have the fire place directly facing the bed,” you explained, your arms gesturing to the layout of the chambers.

“I know the Northeners like to keep the fire on at night to feel cozy, but I tend to get a little… Hot.”

Oh.

His mouth ran a little dry and he only managed to blink at you, as you grinned, your eyes slowly trailing down his body.

“I imagine it is the same for you. What is it again, the motto of your house?”

Jacaerys opened his mouth to answer, but nothing came out of it.

“Fire and blood?” finally pressed out and you arched an eyebrow at him.

“Are you asking or telling me?”

“Telling.”

Your mouth quirked up in a smirk and you brushed your hair back with a flick. “I must say, I have to admit that I thought you less nervous when no one was around.”

“You thought me less nervous when it is just you and I alone in a room?”

“Now when you say it like that…” you mused. “I told you that you do not have to worry about your behavior, I do not know any of the rules you have to abide by.”

“That’s not why I’m nervous,” Jacaerys said with a small laugh and you creased your forehead, looking at him questioningly.

“Is that not what you told me at supper?”

Jacaerys sighed, a chuckle leaving his lips and he had no other choice than to confess.

“You make me nervous because I do not know how to act around you. You make me stutter, lose my footing. I was never anything less than charming when it comes to talking to ladies, but you for some reason…”

Your face contorted from confusion to understanding and then glee.

“And I was starting to think you were letting me down easy.”

“I- what?” The indignation in Jacaerys’ tone made you laugh. “Let you down? Surely you must be jesting.”

“What was I to think? I was not exactly being subtle, my prince.”

Jacaerys bit down on his lower lip, nearly hard enough to draw blood, but he eased off.

“I’m trying my best to uphold my honor. And yours.”

You let out a small laugh, lifting your hand to deftly unhook your cloak. Jacaerys averted his eyes as soon as the cloak slid off your shoulders, but he could out of the corner of his eyes that you were wearing nothing but a nightgown with long, see through sleeves. Jacaerys had never seen a nightgown like that before.

“Would it not be dishonorable to deny yourself what you truly want?”

Jacaerys dared to glance at you, swallowing thickly when he realized that you had come closer, his eyes roaming over your exposed skin. He exhaled sharply, feeling his cock stirring in his breeches, thankful that his tunic was untucked, covering his excitement.

“What if your future husband would cast you aside knowing you have laid with another man?”

You smiled at him, your hand reaching out to trace the neckline of his tunic.

“I think if my husband were to cast me aside for enjoying the pleasure of sex, he is not the right man for me.”

Jacaerys held his breath as you looked at him through your lashes. He managed to stay wrong for about three more seconds, before he let out a frustrated groan, his hand curling around to pull you close, pressing his lips on yours.

You sighed softly into the kiss, your mouth pliable as Jacaerys moved against his, the kiss nearly driving him insane.

He needed more.

Tightening his grip on your waist, Jacaerys pulled you into his lap, situating your legs on either side of him.

“I have been going insane,” Jacaerys whispered against your lips, his finger tips dancing up your arm. “Trying to keep my composure, act like a prince, but one look from you and I lost the ability to string a sentence together.”

“Please,” you gasped as his hand wrapped around the back of your head to tilt it back, placing featherlight kisses on the column of your neck.” Cregan was telling me to behave - for once - because his great friend, the crown prince of the Seven Realms was to attend his nameday celebrations, but how could I when you’re just so-”

Your sentence trailed off in a sigh and Jacaerys pulled back to look at you, an eyebrow arched.

“I am so...?”

“Infuriatingly handsome.” Your voice was breathless as you spoke, hands slipping under his tunic and Jacaerys lifted his arms to help you take it off before you discarded it to the floor carelessly. “Like you were carved out of marble.”

You caressed him with your fingertips over his chest, your touch so tantalizing he had to shift his hips to ease the pressure on his breeches, a motion that did not go unignored by you at the sound of the small whimper that left your mouth, a sound that went directly to his south. He leaned in to kiss you again, before maneuvering you off his lap, standing so he could lead you over to the bed. His touch was gentle, but firm as you followed his lead to lay down at the edge of the bed, your nightgown bunching up at your calves.

“You don’t even know the affect you have on me… You had me on my knees,” he murmured, pushing your gown up. “I’m the crown prince of the seven realms. I don’t kneel for anyone.”

He might make an exception for you.

With his hands on your calves, pulling you closer, Jacaerys got to his knees, peppering small kisses on your inner thigh, making you squirm. He could smell the warmth of your musk as he neared your cunt, your smallclothes displaying a small patch of wetness he couldn’t help but be thrilled by.

“Lift your hips,” Jacaerys said, and when you did, he tugged your smallclothes off easily. He let out a soft breath when coming face to face with your cunt, sliding one finger through your folds. The moan out of your mouth sounded like heaven to him.

“Jace…” you sighed and his breeches got impossibly tighter, but he wanted you to finish first before he could even think about himself. Jacaerys applied a little pressure on your pearl with his thumb, inching closer, his breath hot on your lips before he licked a strip up your cunt. You responded with a small groan, your hands tangled into his locks and he knew he was on the right track.

He kept drawing circles on the small nub over your cunt, his tongue exploring between your folds, trying to elicit every moan and sigh out of your mouth possible, repeating his motions that seemed to please you the most. Soon, Jacaerys had you writhing on his bed, your hand tightened around his hair in a grip that nearly hurt, but he didn’t care.

“Jacaerys…” you breathed out, your hips lifting from the bed; he merely pushed it down with his free hand. “Don’t- I’m so..”

Jacaerys nuzzled his mouth even further into your cunt he not thought possible, the circles he was drawing onto your pearl becoming tighter, smaller until you let out an especially loud moan of his name, your cunt pulsating.

With a breath heave, you fell back into the cushions and Jacaerys pulled back from between your legs, not without leaving a lingering kiss on your inner thigh. You looked absolutely marvelous, blissed out on his bed, your sweaty hair sticking to your forehead. If he had to guess, he must not look any better, his entire face must be covered in you.

“Is this behavior befit for a crown prince?” you asked, chest still heaving. Jacaerys quirked a smile at you, brushing his hair back.

“For a lady like you, without question.”

A small laughter escaped your lips, and you tugged him down to kiss him, your hands slipping beneath his trousers and then his breeches, wrapping around his cock. Jacaerys hissed, bucking into your hands, realizing he was still fully clothes from the waist down. Giving you one last kiss, he reluctantly pulled away from you, taking his boots off, and then slowly pushing his trousers off, his smallclothes along with it.

He couldn’t help but flush as he stood in front of your inquisitive eyes, still wearing your nightgown but looking incredibly debauched, your gaze… Hungry. He got on the bed, crawling towards you on his knees, fingers gingerly pushing your nightgown off your shoulders - you didn’t lift a hand to help him, but merely watched as his eyes grew wide when he finally pushed your nightgown down, as it pooled around your waist.

“You were made by the gods,” he mumbled into your skin, mouth latching on the sensitive skin of your tits, his other hand gently rolling your nipples until it formed into a stiff peak. He leaned up, kissing you deeply and as he moaned into your mouth, he pulled away, breathing hard.

“Do you…” he trailed off, unsure how to word it.

“I will die an immediate death if I don’t,” you said, extremely serious. “Lay back.”

As Jacaerys settled into the mountain of cushions, you knelt in front of him, nightgown long gone. You positioned yourself over his lap, just as he had earlier, hand wrapping around his cock to guide it to your cunt, which was still sopping wet. Jacaerys let out a slow, guttural groan as you lowered yourself onto his cock, until he was fully sheated inside of you.

“Are you feeling alright?” he pressed out, his hands finding your hips to pull out incase you were feeling uncomfortable.

“Perfect,” you breathed, lips parted and eyes hooded. You leaned a hand on his chest, impulsively rolling your hips and Jacaerys moaned, throwing his head back. Slowly, the two of you found your rhythm as you rode him, in slow, but deep hip thrusts. His chambers was filled with the sound of skin hitting skin, whispers of his name and moans of yours. It wasn’t long until Jacaerys felt the familiar tension in his lower stomach, knowing he was close, while you were still moving on top of him, head thrown back.

If he had it his way, he would shoot his load into you, making you his, but the last thing he wanted was to trap you, so he stilled your hips, holding you in place and turning you so he was on top of you. Your hair fanned out on the bed, and Jacaerys kissed you, tongue licking into your mouth as he drove your cock into you with deep, but slow thrusts; his thumb was pressing into your pearl simultaneously.

“Jace,” you whined, your walls clenching and he nearly lost it right then and there. “Please…”

Jacaerys snapped his hips into you harder, leaning his head against yours as he did and after one particular deep thrust, you held onto his bicep as you moaned his name in a way that would ingrain into his brain for the rest of his life and he quickly pulled out, before he emptied his load in thick, white spurts onto your stomach. With a small groan, Jacaerys collapsed onto the bed next to you, neither speaking for a few seconds, catching your breath.

Jacaerys was the first to rise, pushing his hair back, standing to find a wet rag to clean you up. His touch was gentle as he cleaned your stomach, disposing of the dirty rag, lingering on the side of the bed.

“Do you want to stay? For a little while, at least?”

You turned your head to look at him, corners of your mouth tugging up. “If you’ll have me, my prince.”

Jacaerys snorted out a laughter, settling into bed next to you, making sure to pull up the blanket to cover your naked body, even though a warmth was emanating from you, it was rivaling his own.

“Are you sure you’re not a distant kin of Aegon the Conqueror?” he asked, pressing a soft kiss on your shoulder. “You would fit right into our house.”

“I find it very flattering that you think I have royal blood in me,” you laughed as your fingertips traced along his arm.

“It is only a question,” Jacaerys mused. “I think you would get along well with my mother.”

“A foreign girl in front of the esteemed queen of the Seven Realms? I wouldn’t stand a chance. Her royal knights would behead me as soon as I curtsied the wrong way.”

And as the fire crackled in the far corner of the chambers, pressed against your side, Jacaerys knew that while you spoke in jest, he wouldn’t mind you meeting his mother, even if that was highly unlikely. Coming the following morning it seemed like he would never see you again, with you returning home and him returning to King’s Landing.

And while he was a dragon rider, he wasn’t sure if that distance would be easy for him to cover, considering the fact he had duties he had to attend to.

“I really enjoyed your company,” you then said, your voice a bittersweet tone. Jacaerys pressed his nose against your neck, biting back the question if you wanted to come with him, see King’s Landing. He knew he was being foolish.

“As did I yours.”

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

author's note: hehehehehe did u like it?

[m1ckeyb3rry]

AIKU AND PROF BIRCH THEY BOTH HAVE THE MF STUBBLE LMFAOOOOOOO

LMAOO no wait that’s so real Karasu being like “maybe *I* need a ground type then I can compete with yuki and show him I’m the man”

Oh yeah huh I didn’t even register that LMAOSJ er anyways HAHAH wait this can be fake death instance #1 Karasu scared shitless like “oh fuck no is she dead where’d she go damn where’s staraptor when I need it” LMAO the way we both thought about the death instance is so funny I hadn’t even read that part of your response yet truly on the same wavelength!! Bro that’s fr me we keep talking about Karasu and I have to keep reminding myself that hes not the love interest in pursuit

LMAOA I imagine them standing outside the base for the abusers or sth getting ready to go in and otoyas like “woohoo a date with nurse joy here I come!” And readers like “we’re so cooked” but in the end they somehow succeed time to cook up what Tullia and Karasu are doing LMAO wait imagine idk like a sorta filler ep moment maybe when you don’t feel like writing/posting something that super central to the main plot and we get the team split up first we see otoya reader then we get a snippet of Karasu tullia LMAO truly dumbass x dumbass chemical reaction there’s no strong duo than that!!! HAHAH another tally already this is so funny maybe he sends his staraptor out like usual but no one can find them fast enough to help them and they’re just like “hey guys!” Cue the “ARE YOU FUCKING INSANE” LMAO

REAL early gen art >>>> im never getting over the scovillain jumpscare it fr haunts me like what the hell is that…

Omg gojo dynamic from pi I agree that was peak (watch me be one of those people swerving to Karasu)

Ok circling back to birch because I saw the separate post first SO REAL ITS REALLY IS GIVING BIRCH??? Bro even his shirt and pants are kinda reminiscent of aiku colors and like I said the fuckass STUBBLE and the vibes just match too well he definitely would get chased into a tree by some runt pokemon LMAOOOOO retired soccer player Aiku is just Prof birch fr

Yeahhh I thought legendaries might’ve been too much which is why I only kinda considered it as a side plot only but when I was thinking of that I fr thought yk zekroms head is kinda giving karasus hair LMAOOO zapdos also gives really strong chigiri vibes but RAYQUAZA I love rayquaza I remember using its mega really often LMAO

Real an iPad is a more convenient size wise also I’m ngl I am a Google office (??) HATER I remember having to move a doc from word to gdocs and the entire formatting got fucked up and I was like what the fuck just happened????? Like the margins and spacings doubled and shit but wtv….i don’t use it unless i have too google sheets is also ASS bro my dumbass just said “wait is pages not on apple comps/macs” then I remembered that you said you have a windows….the way I already forgot that info from like two seconds ago….

JJK BORUTO crying lowk unless the sequel directly address and includes the current characters I probably won’t bother with anything beyond whatever makes it to my social media feeds either

LOOKING FORWARD TO IT aikulations or not I’ll be ready to laugh

YOU DESERVE IT you truly at the goat of goats wait that’s also so cool that’s essentially what I do when I read (except in reverse order) I lowk wonder how many things we imagine are the same (like small details yk) like I have a very clear visual of what the restaurant they sat in looks like and the outside and the parking lot (buildings and architecture are my greatest enemies in terms of drawing and layout though so I fear I won’t be able to draw it out but maybe I can find a similar looking place?? We’ll see LMAO) but yeah that essentially happens whenever I read stories and books too it’s kinda funny when I see cover art for a book and I’m like oh that’s not what I imagined but ok go off

But OMG???? I will keep my eyes peeled fs but if you’re saying it’s something insane it’ll definitely be something where I lose my mind over so now I’m even more curious LOL also that’s so me I definitely unintentionally pass out more than I should only to wake up and be like haha oh shit

LMAOO tiktok please send a hot audio Mira’s way!!! Im still amazed by bfb though 41k is actually insane for a one shot if anything I feel like that just means your next long fic is just gonna be HUGE wait actually speaking of assuming pursuit is like the pi long fic equivalent for bllk where do hollyhock and peregrine fall on the scale? Just kinda curious LOL not sure if you meant for those to be of the same length or if they’re not like long long if ykwim

Also I’d like you to know that right as I was about to hit send i select all’ed (??) this entire ask and almost deleted it I think if that happened I would’ve passed out

- Karasu anon

THE AIKU BIRCH PARALLEL I WAS CRYINGGGG it was too good 😭 the vibes match up SO well too i can just see niko rescuing him with a random starter pokémon so well LMAOAOA niko the true protagonist of pursuit boruto nagiy/n daughter charles and kurona are just side characters in his adventure

okay ykw is hilarious i just checked yuki’s team and he has an electric type too (manectric) so karasu DEFINITELY needs a ground type because of his electric type ptsd 😭 once he gets garchomp and lucario though he honestly has a good shot at beating yuki just in terms of type match ups though…like talonflame easily takes breloom, honchkrow can deal with alakazam, lucario packs up steelix, garchomp beats noivern and manectric, so the only one left is azumarill and ngl i think one of the birds like staraptor or pidgeot has a decent chance against that KFFJDJSJ so at the end of the day karasu does clutch up 🤩

LMAOO the funniest thing is like because she gets deino relatively early (i think it’ll be her third pokémon??? she’ll catch joltik beforehand) none of karasu’s birds have fully evolved yet so he’s just like WHERE IS MY DAMN STARLY in my mind his birds don’t evolve until he runs away because they need that freedom and consistently tough battling to really be pushed into evolution yk?? but no you’re so right pursuit karasu is so ideal man like nagi’s lucky reader brotherzoned karasu immediately or else he’d be in trouble (jk)

LITERALLY bro otoya’s just thinking about how nurse joy will love him after his (she won’t) meanwhile reader’s like yeah we’re done for but somehow they pull it off (probably thanks to joltik aka undisputed goat of reader’s team) but omg imagine it’s like reader and otoya going through hell trying to save all of these pokémon and then the chapter just cuts to tullia and karasu trying on clothes FJSKDJSJ infernape’s getting a massage karasu’s buying treats for starly it’s truly such a contrast 😭 HELP reader and otoya are subject to an entire lecture from karasu afterwards (mostly otoya because reader told karasu it was his fault) they’re just sitting there like niko after the game against team z LMAOAOAOA

IT HAUNTS ME TOO DW I THINK ABOUT IT QUITE FREQUENTLY AND NEGATIVELY HAHAAHA the early gen art with the water color vibe is so pretty though i love it!!

please it’s okay i’m doing my best not to swerve myself 😟 it’s fine though as long as i give a pi gojo vibe to him too it should be okay i hope…like this is our stressed out bird obsessed big brother DJFJSJS we have to lock in and go crazy for nagi fr

okay wait imagine that pursuit is kind of like a prequel to the main games?? in the sense that reader and nagi and all fix training and the perception of trainers so it’s closer to what it’s like in the game series…and then niko is the protagonist of the games themselves (i can def see him w one of the little zygarde cells as well as zygarde itself) with nagiy/n’s daughter, charles, and kurona as the little trio of rivals ☝🏻 nagiy/n’s daughter getting yveltal (taking after her mother in terms of looking sweet but having demonic team members), kurona getting xerneas, and charles getting nothing (him with a legendary is TERRIFYING)

brooo google suite sucks but it’s more convenient than word because i can access it on my phone without any extra effort 😓 so a bit more convenient than word for that reason but it’s so glitchy and annoying that i just switched to pages straight up LMAOAOAOA

i feel like everyone must picture smth different!! especially because i don’t describe settings to the point that it’s very obvious what you’re supposed to be imagining just general vibes yk…i feel like it’s probably based on your prior experiences?? but if you ever draw or find reference images do send them in hehe i will appreciate it 🤩

AAHHH I’M ASSUMING IT LIVED UP TO THE HYPE pursuit drop last night was crazy fr 😰 given that the mini prologue was 2.5k words alone i think we can predict that the word count is going to be insane 😭 peregrine if i had to guess would be in that 80-100k word count range and hollyhock could be more or less than that really depending on how deep i decide to go with the lore and how much of the in between i decide to show!! if that makes sense LMAOO

[noxtivagus]

AGHHHHH I SCREAMED SO LOUDLY WHEN I SAW CLAUDE

[madaraservingcunt]

Madara Uchiha is one of the hottest fictional characters of all time alongside Guts from Berserk and Jin Kazama from Tekken. Madara Uchiha needs to be pregnant with the pure power of determination and science i'll make madara carry my babies. madara uchiha is so hot like why bother simping for characters like either sasuke or aizen when madara exists. Madara is buff and muscular as fuck, madara is more interesting personality wise, madara actually fucking accomplishes what he sets out to do (he actually unleashed the Infinite Tsukuyomi. yeah kaguya sadly kills him not too long afterwards but still he fucking did it.). aizen and sasuke are just skinny twink #3278 and #3279. both aizen and sasuke are ai generated as fuck, they are literally the average generic skinny twink with twig arms and twig legs and they're marty stus who hate women. Both Sasuke and Aizen looks like if an ai generated an image based on a prompt "conventionally attractive man". Both Aizen and Sasuke will never be as cool or as sexy as the great lord Madara Uchiha. if you look up something like "someone so beautiful that they're ugly", you will 100% see a picture of either Sasuke Uchiha or Sosuke Aizen as the first result. Buff Giga Chad Alpha Male Raikage should've cucked both Aizen and Sasuke, Raikage should've married both Momo and Sakura to make them suffer (leave Hinata and Naruto alone, my GOAT Jesus Naruto suffered enough). anyways madara daddy is a goat, thank you blog-chan for giving me these sweet ass madara gifs and art to like and stare at for hours. i hope you have a good day!

I'm so glad you enjoy the blog enough to spend hours looking at our king 👑 🤩

He is the shawty in all of our hearts.

Thank you anon for giving me such a fun inbox! I hope you have a good day too 😊 I'm not sure how long ago you sent this, but it was nice to revisit and see people still send me fresh asks 😭 I don't deserve yall fr.

I missed you guys! Yalls creativity is unmatched.

I'm going to try going through my inbox and dusting off my .png folder to get back to memes for you guys 🫶

[sambergscott]

notes from the palm springs commentary !! 🏝

i know not everyone has access to hulu and i know i'd be gutted if i couldn’t watch it too so bc i'm lucky enough to have an american friend who let me use her hulu account i thought i'd share the commentary with you all on here <3 

- their first bit of commentary is “there’s a title” (cristin) and “there’s a goat” (andy)... 10/10 anaylsis thanks guys

- andy joked that they talked about waiting for an earthquake but decided they didn’t have the budget to wait that long (he said the glowing lights at the end were real tho 🙄)

- andy: “we’re gonna start off pretty racy” djfdjfkdjgh

- “for all those kids out there, the b99 fans, you probably don’t wanna watch this”.... but andy,, we absolutely Do

- andy was cristin’s least favourite person in the movie

- nyles spread eagle on the bed was in the script not an acting choice

- according to andy there were 700,000 bugs just hatched where they filmed the wedding scenes that they had to edit out in post (also it was suuuuuper cold and cristin was shivering)

- ANDY CALLED HIMSELF A BUTT UGLY WEIRDO. NO SIR. U ARE THE FURTHEST THING FROM THAT.

- the dance move when he clapped his hands over his head “lightly hurt his schlong”

- they had 20-30 options for orchid explosion by fournier, cristin pitched some too that she “does not remember!” (she said that very cute)

- they talk about how great june squibb is and how andy is impressed that she wasn’t complaining about the cold/shooting at 5am/the fact that they improved a lil bit.  “she doesn’t not give a what”

- during the make out scene on the rock cristin goes “ohhh ~spicy~”

- they also had to have a snake wrangler come out before they shot that scene and he was like “uhh i think it’s good?”

- andy was excited about having to get shot by an arrow when he was reading the script (it was also the moment they realised this movie was zanier than first thought)

- the cave was the same place they shot the old batman movies

- they started working on palm springs on november 9th 2016…. hence the wedding date

- cristin said they did about 30 takes (at least) of her opening her eyes/sitting up.. basically the entire first half of the first day shooting she spent doing the same thing

- “i just think you’re the coolest cristin, way to go man!” “you too andy!”

- the beer is fictional and has a meaning behind it.. the tortoise is to do with a myth about the universe or smth

- andy wants someone to make the beer fr

- “so here is cristin in the desert pretending to be hot” “he means physically” “TEMPERATURE HOT… i have no opinions on her appearance”

- they wanted to skip past the set-up-y parts to avoid it being too groundhog day and add diff dynamics and comedic elements that come from that

- according to andy, nyles has been in the loop an “insanely long time” (cristin and andy like that you don’t know the exact number of years bc however many years it’s been nothing has changed for nyles)

- cristin’s fondest memories were spending days in that dusty ass car together (i too would like to be that girl in his car)

- “i like your hat” “of course you do” was improved by andy and jk

- andy said jk is a “national treash”

- andy loved shooting the montage w jk (and he thinks that montage + the scene at the end is why jk signed up to do ps)

- “i went full butt” - andy samberg, 2021

- HE HAS A STUNT DOUBLE CALLED SETH WHO HAS A SIGNIFICANTLY BETTER BUTT THAN HIM (but andy’s butt was funnier so they went with his)

- the very last shot of the movie was nyles getting the handjob in the car

- max or other andy i can’t remember who talked for a while about how talented our andy is. can’t wait for that oscar nom!!!!!

- if andy were in a time loop he’d try to catch up on shows for a few years (and then try and leave)

- cristin is horrified that he’d choose to watch all of MASH to get him through a time loop

- cristin LOVED filming all the deaths

- andy said that their dance scene in the denim jacket replaces every iconic dance scene ever like fame/dirty dancing/etc etc and he’s right

- he dropped her in that scene bc his arms are “weak and floppy like a baby calf”

- the tattoo moment was the only fully improved scene

- they REALLY wanted it in the movie

- cristin insisted on the hook hand and eye patch and they obliged and she said she kept the hook hand and put it on her mantle and andy was like “prove it prove it prove it prove it prooooooove it”

- she did Indeed prove it

- orange in the movie significies intimacy and that whole montage is coloured orange to show them falling in love

- they loved shooting the tent scene

- the first night they filmed it there was a sandstorm and rain and they had to hide under a tarp and they came back the next night and they were able to get looser with it bc it was the last day of shooting and they’d basically done the whole thing the night before

- the dinosaurs bit was a “symbolic moment between the characters - they are 2 people who don’t believe they can be loved so they’re feeling something impossible and therefore they should see something impossible”

- the wake-ups were like an acting exercise in a way bc each wake up was diff emotionally based on where they were in the loop

- nyles finally cares about something (her) for the first time in maybe hundreds of years and he immediately gets slapped down :(((

- “suck my dick officer bitch” was cristin’s ad lib!!! (if anyone makes a montage of her life’s work she would like it to either begin or end w suck my dick officer bitch, andy said why not both)

- “for some reason i rolled up one of my sleeves [after nyles woke up after their fight] and then we couldn’t get out of it so that was a lesson! it was a terrible choice”

- andy loves the overhead pool shot

- everytime andy watches the confrontation at the wedding he feels terrible for tala, we love an empathetic king

- re: roy’s arc andy talks about how important it is to relish what you’ve got and it was v v v v sweet

- everyone laughed so hard in the arrow/garbage bin scene

- apparently tyler’s shirtlessness in the shower was distracting for people in early tests and they had to tone it back w colour correction 💀

- cristin was like “did that happen when i had to take my shirt off?” and andy was like “uh huh yeah”

- the goat was on set for a couple of days + apparently cristin would talk to it in between takes 🥺🥺🥺 can she get any cuter

- max talked about how they lucky they were to get andy and cristin and how the movie wouldn’t have worked without them, they were so on the same wavelength and there was an early meeting where nobody else could get a word in bc they were talking so much

- nobody was in it for the paycheck, “it was for the love, and dare i say it, for the art” <3

- they took 3-4 nights to shoot the entire wedding, andy can Not stress enough how much they were rushing

- they haven’t busted out any bloopers yet bc they used pretty much every frame they could/reused them in different places

- cristin doesn’t want to know if nana knows bc the mystery of it is what makes the movie so great!

- andy said there’s no definitive answer to a lot of stuff bc a lot of the people working on the movie had diff opinions

- the french song w the slo mo bit of sarah in the bar was cristin’s choice

- andy is v confused why people think spuds is nyles’ dad,, he’s just tricking him into getting a ride and andy’s sorry to everyone who thought it was real

- cristin liked that the payoff at the end felt like payoff while still staying true to who nyles and sarah are and not just super romantic bc “it’s a romcom!” [andy said throwing his arms in the air]

- cloudbursting was andy’s idea from the very first meeting about the movie but we been knew

- andy: “here’s the ending! nobody knows what it means!”

- the family at the end was the producer’s family, they drove a very long way to do that 2 second scene lol

- andy and cristin were swaying to when the morning comes at the end 🥺

- andy clapped and shouted “WELL PRODUCED” when his/tli’s credit came up hahaha

[symphonic-scream]

I don’t know which parents you want miraculous for (just the characters you like? Just the “good” parents? All of them indiscriminately?) but here are some ideas.

Monkey Anarka isn’t even a question, man. Villains can suck her banana because she’s here to cause as much chaos as humanly possible.

Something about Tiger Audrey just makes sense. She “exalted” Gabriel to the elite position he’s in now, and she’s all about that influence/clout/whichever dub you prefer.

Mouse Marlena. She has a husband who loses his temper over stupid stuff and four kids; rowdy, hyperactive af young twins who love to cause problems on purpose, a famous blogger teenage daughter who runs straight into danger every day, and a boxer adult daughter who has her dad’s temper and a tendency to start beef. Also she’s the head chef in a high end restaurant. Do you know how crazy that job is? She must be the CEO of multitasking.

Turtle Tom. Weredad shows just how protective he is.

Snake Sabine. Three alliterations in a row! I promise I’m not doing this on purpose. She’s mature, calm, and knows what’s up. She has the patience of a saint and the commitment to make sure she doesn’t stop resetting until she’s done everything she can to help.

I tried to come up with something different from her son for Claudie, but the horse is a really good fit for her. Both her current job and her aspiring career have to do with transportation.

Rabbit Tomoe. She’s serious, analytical, and organized, and she has that talent of giving enough damns to set things straight, but not so many that she sticks her nose where it doesn’t belong. She’s cool enough to handle the pressure of being the “last chance” holder, and she’d stop at nothing to achieve the timeline she sees as the “correct” one.

Dragon Jagged. I was going back and forth on this, but even though he’s far from perfection as a dad, he won’t accept anything less than the perfect representation of the image he’s going for in both his sound and his visuals. Now that I think about it, you could say perfectionism is what caused him to be a dead beat in the first place; he thought he wasn’t good enough, so he chose dipping out over being less-than-perfect. Also he’d love the superpower, and his suit design would be fire.

Goat Andre. Just- just hear me out. I don’t know what it does beyond whatever theories I have, but let’s come back to this one. Trust me.

Bee Otis because I think he’d benefit from a straightforward physical power that performs one simple action.

Don’t laugh- I think Alim should have the butterfly. Maybe the s1 crack theorists were fr onto something. His job would give him knowledge of art, history, and world culture, and his proper demeanor would make him much more careful and a better manager than incompetent Hawkmoth. He’d have the background to create well designed champions, especially the badass mythology-based ones we love so much. Alim would never let himself “lose” an akuma on a train or accidentally akumatize a baby.

Pig Roger. Haha get it? It’s funny. I think he’d benefit from the least violent miraculous, and he could channel his desire for order and control into simply making others comply by realizing what they want for themselves.

We don’t know what the rooster does, but I’m giving it to Fred. It makes sense to me, so we’ll get back to this.

Gabriel sucks at butterflying, so he gets the dog. He’s (overly) loyal to his dead wife, and he’s super resourceful (one of his only positive traits).

I’m not doing Mrs. Rossi because they literally used a background character model for her. We know nothing about her.

I think these are all the parents of the miraculous kids we have so far. I’d feel terrible if I forgot anyone. I was hesitant to give anyone the bug or cat because all the parents are more minor characters, and those two are so important.

That leaves the fox, peacock, and ox, the last of which I think a lot of them are actually going to fit with, but we know close to nothing about it. I don’t think anyone fits with the other two better than my matches, especially since the parents tend to be played off as silly adults, and those miraculous require really smart users.

Actually, scratch that. Amilie can have the fox because I feel like she’s hiding something under that silly, sweet personality.

I hope to see more parents in s5 because too many of these kids don’t have canon families yet!

Oh damn this is very in depth and very thought out thank you

[troybeecham]

Fr. Troy Beecham

Sermon, Proper 29 A, 2020

The Last Sunday after Pentecost, often called the Feast of Christ the King

Matthew 25:31-46

“Jesus said, “When the Son of Man comes in his glory, and all the angels with him, then he will sit on the throne of his glory. All the nations will be gathered before him, and he will separate people one from another as a shepherd separates the sheep from the goats, and he will put the sheep at his right hand and the goats at the left. Then the king will say to those at his right hand, ‘Come, you that are blessed by my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world; for I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you gave me clothing, I was sick and you took care of me, I was in prison and you visited me.’ Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry and gave you food, or thirsty and gave you something to drink? And when was it that we saw you a stranger and welcomed you, or naked and gave you clothing? And when was it that we saw you sick or in prison and visited you?’ And the king will answer them, ‘Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these who are members of my family, you did it to me.’ Then he will say to those at his left hand, ‘You that are accursed, depart from me into the eternal fire prepared for the devil and his angels; for I was hungry and you gave me no food, I was thirsty and you gave me nothing to drink, I was a stranger and you did not welcome me, naked and you did not give me clothing, sick and in prison and you did not visit me.’ Then they also will answer, ‘Lord, when was it that we saw you hungry or thirsty or a stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and did not take care of you?’ Then he will answer them, ‘Truly I tell you, just as you did not do it to one of the least of these, you did not do it to me.’ And these will go away into eternal punishment, but the righteous into eternal life.”

The Gospel reading for this last Sunday after Pentecost, increasingly known as the Feast of Christ the King, is often called the ‘parable of the sheep and the goats’. But there’s a problem with calling it that because it isn’t actually a parable. Jesus always introduces his parables by saying something like ‘the kingdom of heaven is like this’, which this Gospel reading does not have. Moreover, this Gospel reading is not even about sheep and goats. I have heard sermon after sermon focusing on the Greek and Hebrew words for sheep and goat, and they all are missing the point. Christians have also habitually read and preached this narrative (at least for the last hundred years or so) as Jesus telling his disciples how to care for the poor, but this entirely misses the point of what Jesus is saying. So, if it is not any of these things, what is Jesus saying to us in this narrative?

To begin with, we must look at the larger context of the readings from the Gospel according to St. Matthew that we have been reading for the last several weeks. Beginning in chapter 24, we find Jesus and his disciples at the Temple in Jerusalem, just days from his arrest, trial, crucifixion and resurrection. Jesus tells his disciples to look at the splendor of the Temple, and it was splendorous…one of the ancient 7 wonders of the world. He tells them that the Temple will soon be destroyed (which it was, in 70 AD), and after that, at a time that only the Father knows, the end of time and the dawning of the Kingdom of God will come. The disciples are astonished, dumbfounded, and ask Jesus what will the coming of the Kingdom of God look like, and what will be the signs of it nearing. As you will recall, for the last several weeks Jesus has been teaching us that very thing. He has told us that the coming of that great day will be sudden and unexpected, and so we must remain vigilant and faithful. He has given us the stories about the faithful and wicked servants, the wise and foolish virgins, and the talents/bags of gold to illustrate the urgency of remaining faithful to him. It is urgent because there will be a Day of Judgment, and the all the peoples of the earth will be judged. In the face of the coming of that day, how are his disciples to live among the peoples of the world?

In this morning’s narrative, we read about a king, judging the peoples of the world. We read of sheep and goats, being divided to the left and right, some going to paradise and others to punishment. We are unused to such stark words from Jesus, at least in the last century or so. Earlier generations were habituated to the concept of judgment, reward, and damnation, but we have largely moved away from such ideas in Western religious culture, largely in response to the horrors of the world wars of the 20th century. Over the last few decades we have become more habituated to the gentle shepherd Jesus, buddy Jesus, anti-capitalist Jesus, socialist Jesus…all kinds of new ways of thinking about Jesus, all of them very human, and almost none of them recognizing him as the incarnate Son of God to whom the Father has given all authority and judgment, and who will one day judge all the peoples of the world. This Sunday is a sobering reminder that Jesus is the Son of God, the King of kings and the Lord of lords, and he will be the Judge of all humankind.

So, what are we to make, then, of this narrative about that Last Day, the Day of Judgment, and the one who will be the Judge?

The first thing we must do is to look at this narrative with fresh eyes. We have become used to hearing the focus being on the sheep and the goats, and how our behavior determines which of the two we will be when we stand before the Lord. But the focus of the entire narrative is on Jesus himself, exalted as the Son of God and Judge of all creation. He is the Son of Man who sits on the throne of his glory, with his angels all about him.

This makes focusing on debating the criteria of judgment an error of profound proportions. We are used to hearing something like this: the ‘least of these’ are the poor of the world; the sheep are those who care for the poor rather than a pallid set of beliefs that lead to no change; and the goats are those who neglect Jesus’ teaching; all of which turn this narrative into a general argument of the importance of caring for the poor. Caring for the poor is theologically important and entirely commendable, but again, this Gospel narrative is not about that, and we make it so to our peril and the peril of those who will never be given the chance to know and love Jesus our Savior.

Contrary to the popular reading of this narrative, we see instead Jesus as our heavenly Judge. He will one day invite those on his right to ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world…’. This judgment will come as a complete surprise, and the king has to explain that ‘Whenever you did this for the least…you did it for me’. In the same way, those on his left are also surprised that they have encountered the king in his moment of need and are horrified at being judged to suffer eternal punishment. If this narrative was Jesus’ way of teaching us about helping the poor, then those who helped or failed to help the poor, especially we who have been reading it and doing it for two millennia, would hardly be surprised to find that they had been doing as the king asked.

But there is nothing in the narrative itself that speaks about entrance into the kingdom of God as a reward based on a life of good works. This is difficult for us to hear. Western Christianity has largely wandered back to the ancient error of thinking that salvation can be earned by anything that we can do or that we fail to do. Salvation is the free gift of God, something that God gives to his children. Rather than proposing a system by which we can merit eternal paradise and escape eternal punishment, this narrative uses the language of family, of inheritance. Language about inheritance echoes God’s promise to the people of Israel, to whom God has given the land of Israel as an ‘inheritance’, not because of they were particularly good or faithful; quite the contrary. They were made inheritors of the promise because God chose them as his people, and they inherit as a son inherits from a father in the ancient world. You don’t need to be ‘good’, you need to be a child of God, chosen by God and adopted by God. The New Testament is replete with this language of adoption by God, and of receiving the inheritance because of God’s gracious generosity now made possible to all peoples through his Son, Jesus, the Son of Man, the Resurrected Savior.

How, then, may we be adopted, how do we become children of God in Jesus? In his Great Commission to his disciples, Jesus said that all must be baptized to become his disciples. He also said that any who would follow him must partake of his Body and Blood. Here we find his two Sacraments by which we become one with him. Many found this teaching too difficult to accept and departed from him. In the Gospel according to St. Matthew, Jesus also only ever refers to his brothers or sisters as those who do the will of God by becoming his followers, those who will take up the cross and follow him. This is particularly clear in Matthew 12:49, when Jesus astonishes everyone by saying that his family are those disciples who obey his commands and who take up their cross and follow him, and not simply those related by blood or human community. Many had trouble with this and left Jesus, because Jesus is clear that to follow him often means to be rejected by family and society, to become homeless, to experience persecution, and even death. We in the West have come far from having to experience these things as disciples of Jesus, but our Christian sisters and brothers around the world face this on a daily basis. Christians are the single most persecuted religious group in the world. In the last decade Christianity has nearly been eradicated in the lands of its birth in the Middle East and North Africa by Islamic violence. On average, a Christian is martyred for the Faith every 11 minutes according to credible estimates by international observers.

In very real terms for many, to follow Jesus means they will be like him, becoming a refugee, expelled from family, jailed, reliant on the charity and provision of others, and face death. With this in mind, the narrative then identifies the ‘least of these’ as not being the poor of the world in general, but is a direct reference to being a disciple of Jesus and the consequences of that choice in a world hostile to his Gospel. When read like this, those on the king’s right are people who have welcomed his persecuted disciples, and in doing so have welcomed Jesus himself because his disciples have become one body with him through Holy Baptism, the Blessed Sacrament, and through faithfulness to his commands. This echoes what St. Paul comes to understand when he hears Jesus say to him as he is on his way to persecute the disciples of Jesus in Damascus: ‘Why do you persecute me?’ To persecute the disciples of Jesus because they are his disciples is to persecute him, and to persecute him is to persecute the one who will sit on the Throne of Judgment at the last day.

The division of the people of the world, then, is not between those who do or do not care for the poor of the world, but between those who care for the followers of Jesus or don’t, and in so doing show their attitude to the king himself. There is no doubt that this reading of this narrative is challenging, but it does have the virtue of being faithful to the words of Jesus.

In the end, this narrative is entirely about Jesus, who he is and who he will be: he is the exalted Son of Man, who brings the needs of people of God into the presence of the Father; he is the exalted king who even now sits on the right hand of the throne of God as rightful king; and he is the true Shepherd, through whom the Father exercises his reign and his entrusts his final, just judgement. It is also about who he is in his disciples.

For many of us, to be united with Jesus in the Sacraments and through faithfulness to his commands carries little risk; but for many hundreds of millions of his disciples around the world it entails truly risking being hungry, thirsty, naked, a stranger, sick, in prison, or murdered. This has been true for Christians in many parts of the world in many ears in history. It is perhaps only we who have been free from persecution who have drifted away from understanding Jesus’ intent in this narrative. We have been reading ourselves into the narrative as the noble helper rather than being aware of, and doing all that we can do to share in easing the sufferings of, the powerless disciples of Jesus in need of help around the world.

We must be careful here to not turn this again into a way for us to meritoriously earn salvation, or to make the misguided step of setting up our own seats of judgment about who we think will be rewarded or punished. We are not judges! Jesus is saying that his judgement will not just take place on the grounds of whether or not people like and help his disciples. Rather, his judgment is based on the grounds of whether they receive his disciples because we are living the lives Jesus has called us to live: making disciples of all peoples, calling people to repentance, baptizing them and teaching them to obey all of his commandments, and proclaiming the coming of the Kingdom of God. It is because how people receive the disciples of Jesus because they are his disciples is how they receive him, the King of Glory, the Son of God, Savior and Judge of all.

We cannot possibly now know who will be judged as blessed or as condemned. We do not know the secrets of people’s hearts, nor do we know all the deeds of a person, and so we judge no one, not even ourselves. Instead, we trust in Jesus, the Son of God who took on our humanity, who suffered at our hands, accepted being an outcast, and was cruelly murdered by us, the very ones he came to save. We trust in Jesus, who destroyed death by accepting his own death, and rose triumphant from the grave. We trust in Jesus because he will judge us all in love. We trust him because his own prayer is that all people may become one in him, and therefore become one with the Father just as he and the Father are one. And in that trust, sisters and brothers, we who are his body, his Church, must faithfully engage the world as his disciples, proclaiming the good news of salvation both with the testimony of our lives and with the words of our mouths, making disciples of all peoples, baptizing them in his name, and teaching them to be faithful to all of his commandments. We must accept the risk, taking up the cross and following him. We must not fail to offer the good news of his salvation to any person. And he will be with us, through persecution, suffering, and all manner of things, unto the end of the ages.

Almighty and everlasting God, whose will it is to restore all things in your well-beloved Son, the King of kings and Lord of lords: Mercifully grant that the peoples of the earth, divided and enslaved by sin, may be freed and brought together under his most gracious rule; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and forever. Amen.