#HES A GRASS/ICE TYPE KINDA GUY

[nick-close]

Glenn Pokémon PITCH

-Roggenrola (obviously)

-Weedle (funny) (beedrill is also funny)

-one of the eevees (leafeon? Weed dog? Could see umbreon tho.)

-delibird (Christmas, his main guy)

-swirlix (munchies)

-gulpin (gulpin on deez nuts)

-darumaka (fire and little guy)

-meloetta (singer and also he deserves a mythic Pokémon ppl r confused how he achieved)

(Before someone says ‘there’s a literal weed cat’ I think Glenn is a dog guy which I hate but is true. Also he had leafeon first.)

He doesn’t battle them they just hang out. Also probably has an oddish but I already gave him too many guys. I can also see Tandemaus (ik they’re mice not rats but yk)

[arc-misadventures]

A Pokémon Trainers Adventures

Today a group of Pokémon trainers in training were all meeting together at a diner catching up on their adventures throughout the lands of, Sinnoh on the way to becoming, Pokémon Masters

Ruby: Whoo! It's great to see you guys again!

Blake: It's great to see you too, Ruby.

Nora: It feels like it's been years since we last met.

Ren: It's only been five months.

Nora: Years...

Pyrrha: It's been years in, Nora's time.

Ren: ...

Weiss: That makes sense.

Ren: An uncomfortable amount of sense.

Yang: So, what crazy adventures did you guys go on while becoming Pokémon masters?

Nora: Oh, me first!

Yang: Alright, go ahead, Nora.

Nora: Okay... I was deep in the industrial zone, searching for, Pokémon to add to my party... When suddenly from out of the shadows appear a derange vacuum cleaner coming straight at me, with murderous intent in it's eyes! I call out my, Bronzor, Blingy ,and we engaged in a grueling duel to the death with this killer vacuum! It was a fierce duel, but we managed to defeat the vile vacuum cleaner! But, after we destroyed the evil vacuum, a Pokémon flew out of the machine, but before it could escape, I threw a Great Ball at it, and I caught, Rotoma!

RWBYP: Rotoma?

Ren: The vacuum cleaner was possessed by a, Rotom. When, Nora caught him, so she named it, Rotoma

RWBYP: Ohh!

Yang: Nice name!

Ruby: Okay, my turn! So, I recently defeated the gym leader of, Veilstone City, Gym Leader, Maylene!

Yang: Oh, nice job, Ruby!

Blake: Well done!

Ruby: Thanks! It was a tough to fight her, and her fighting type Pokémon gave my guys a run for their money. We barely managed to eke out a win. I've been doing some training to strengthen my, Pokémon so we're not stuck on the ropes again.

Pyrrha: Smart move, Ruby. That's what I did after I beat, the gym leader of, Calavane City, Byron. He may have mostly metal type, but my, Luxray was knocked out in the first round with ease!

Weiss: Yeah, gym leaders may specialize on one type of Pokémon, but that doesn't mean they're a pushover if you have a Pokémon that their pokemon is weak against. Like when I lost to, Gardenia with my, Glaceon.

Ruby: But, aren't water type, Pokemon, weak to grass types?

Weiss: Vaporeon is the water type eeveelution. Glaceon is the ice type eeveelution.

Ruby: Ohh! So she curb stomped your Pokémon then?

Weiss: She bullied poor, Mr. Snappy...

Yang: Mr. Snappy?

Blake: That's what, Weiss calls her, Sharpedo.

Yang: Oh that's cute!

Blake: So, what about you, Ren, anything interesting happen to you?

Ren: Oh, well... I found a Pokémon egg a while ago, and I was nursing it, and it recently hatched into a, Riolu.

Yang: Oh, a Riolu! That's a nice Pokémon to have!

Blake: Are you having a hard time training it?

Ren: No, she's a delight to have around, I'm enjoying training her with the rest of my other Pokémon. What about you, Yang, did you do anything interesting?

Yang: Oh, I've been entering some Pokémon beauty contest lately. I haven't won anything yet, but we've gotten pretty close to. So, we've been training for the next competition. What, about you, Blake?

Blake: Not much, bar getting my ass handed to me by the gym leader of, Hearthome City, Fantina. Her ghost type Pokémon do not play around...

Pyrrha: Yeah, I still haven't beaten her myself.

Weiss: Her Pokémon scare me...!

Nora: Me too!

Ruby: Well, I don't I think her Pokémon are really cool!

Yang: Of course you like ghosts.

Ruby: What, they're cool!

Pyrrha: Hahaha! So, what about you, Jaune?

Jaune: Hmm... what?

Pyrrha: You've been pretty quiet. Has something interesting happen lately?

Jaune: Well... kinda...

Yang: Ohh~! You got an interesting story to tell! Let's hear it!

Jaune: Well...

~~~

Unlike the rest of his friends, Jaune was just having an adventure, exploring the lands of, Sinnoh. Exploring the land, meeting new people, and Pokémon. Occasionally engaging in a battles with his fellow trainers, and when he decides he ready to, engage in a match with a gym leader.

He didn't have a lot of problems, or more accurately, challenges whenever he got into a Pokémon battle. He even had a fight against, Sinnoh's Pokémon champion, and honestly, he enjoyed the conversation the pair had afterwards more so than the battle itself. So, instead of worrying about Pokémon battles, gym badges, and what not, he just went on an adventure with his Pokémon, and meeting new Pokémon, and people.

And, one day while, Jaune was enjoying the beauty of a pound filled with lily pads, enjoying the elegant lotus blossoms upon the lily pads. A content sigh escaped his lips as he just enjoyed the moment. But as, Jaune was watchin the pound, he saw a dark shadow from the cave the pound fed into grow darker, and darker across the lily pads, as he eyes were drawn upward. His eyes widened in stunned awe, as he looked into the deep crimson eyes of the being on the other side of the void: Giratina.

Jaune: ...

Giratina: ...

Jaune: ...

Giratina: ...

Jaune: Hi.

Giratina: ZEHHAAA!!!

Jaune: ...

Jaune: Okay...

~~~

Jaune: ...

Pyrrha: Jaune? Jaune you okay...?

Jaune: I have a date with the, Sinnoh Pokémon Champion, Cynthia!

RWBYNPR: WHAT?!

Yang: You've got a date with who?!

Weiss: That's fucking bullshit!

~~~

Jaune: Oh gods...

: So because you thought your friends wouldn't believe the fact you saw the legendary banished Pokémon, Giratina. You instead said that you had a date with, Sinnoh's Pokémon champion?

Jaune: Honestly, I don't think they would believe me if I had a date in general, much less with who I said it was with.

: Honestly, I have a hard time believing it myself.

Jaune: Cynthia, we're on a date right now?

Cynthia: ...

Cynthia: Oh yeah...

[kotonesh1omi]

Guys I've been re-watching MHA recently, and I've gotten to the episodes in which class 1-A fights class 1-B.

When Kaminari and his team were worried about Ibara I thought: "yeah that makes sense, Kaminari is an electric type and Ibara is a grass type, and grass resists electric! Of course they're worried!"

So now I've been thinking about which Pokémon types every character would be, so here are my thoughts for class 1-A:

Izuku: normal and fighting; he's normal type due to him being quirkless before

Katsuki: fire and fighting; since there's no explosion type he'll have to be a fire type, and fighting due to his great physical capabilities

Shouto: fire and ice; i think it's pretty obvious why

Kaminari: electric; also pretty obvious

Fumikage: dark; also also pretty obvious

Mina: poison; due to her acid, which is kinda like poison?

Ochako: psychic; i mean, Gravity is a psychic attack so it kinda makes sense (i don't really have a reason for all of them tbh)

Momo: normal

Kyoka: normal; if only there was a sound type...

Sero: normal

Hagakure: normal and ghost; she's a ghost type since she's invisible!

Tsuyu: water

Mineta: normal

Ojiro: fighting

Sato: fighting

Kirishima: rock and fighting

Aoyama: fairy; i honestly have no idea for him, i just thought: dazzling gleam and rolled with it

Shoji: fighting

Kouda: normal

Iida: steel

I'll try to do fakemon designs, but I don't promise anything. Do you guys agree with the types that I gave them? Or would change some of them? Please do tell me, i'd really like to know your opinions!

I'll make a part two with class b... Eventually

[rhytmrocket]

hi so uh

i have a playthrough of pokemon shield in which im only using poison types (as soon as i got access to them) and so uh here's my team of dumbass creatures

explained below the cut (left-right, top-bottom), we have:

Bria, a sassy roserade who's kinda just there cuz i like roserade, and is thus a swing slot. functionally, she's kinda just a diet nikki with grass stab who happens to also serve cunt

Chia, a quirky garbodor who's my lead in major battles. she sets up spikes+tox spikes and explodes. the sweetest fuckin thing

Niro, a timid low-key toxtricity who mainly functions as electric stab. he's the resident chill guy who lowkey (heh) doesn't give a fuck

Nikki, a timid haunter who's my special-attacking nuke. she's kinda just Bria +speed, ice coverage, and stab on shadow ball but -grass coverage. but who needs grass coverage. she is a nefarious schemer

Ura, a quiet skuntank who's my physical attacker and main source of coverage. dark stab, flamethrower, dig, and a psychic immunity are quite nice to have. she's a powerhouse in battle and incredibly sleepy out of battle

and Quoisse, a bashful toxapex who stalls and has water stab. also my primary second-choice in double battles cuz blockhaus (i forgot its english name) is cool and it's cooler than protect. ironically, she highkey hates everyone except me

i also have Vic, a bashful toxicroak who shares the swing slot with Bria, but i didn't have space on the canvas to draw him and was too exhausted to do him separately. so i'll draw him later. he's basically just fighting stab and earthquake user since dig isn't really the best ground type option bc it's vulnerable to said eq (which Ura is already weak to) and two turns is a long time. he likes breaking things, such as the bones of steel types (do steel types have bones?)

so yeah those are my dogs :>

[champion-level-astroturfing]

[A video is posted...

It starts out being filmed by Shardy; the phone is clearly in his hand, taking in the aisles of a large Pokemart before it angles downwards to focus on Blue Diamond the Glaceon. The little guy is walking next to his friend, demure in a bright green harness, and dragging with him an entire cushion. It's a smooth blue, with a happy little cartoon Eiscue on it, and big enough for him to comfortably lie on.

"Doing okay with that?" asks Shardy's voice, incredibly amused. Blue makes a muffled chirruping sound, perfectly happy with his burden, and Shardy laughs.

"Alright, well, that's your treat. Time for Her Majesty's."

He moves the phone up to show where he is: the Grass-type aisle, in front of a row of shelving units stacked high with all shapes and sizes of plant pot. The fancy kind he originally picked out is visible about halfway up the second unit.

"She's gotta like one of these at least," he says, with possibly unwarranted confidence. There's the sound of a Pokeball opening, and he pans down to show Queen Fezzerie the Third, ten seconds out of the ball and already poised to throw a tantrum.

"Hey girl," says Shardy, and when her head snaps up immediately with a gaze of utter displeasure he corrects to "Your Majesty Queen Fezzerie. The third. Sorry. Hey. Since you didn't like the pot I got you before, I thought you might like to pick out your own? That way it's definitely exactly what you want."

The little flower 'mon considers for a moment, then imperiously reaches her blooms upwards in the universal signal to be lifted. She's small enough that Shardy has to go down on one knee to easily provide a hand for her to ride on, and that if nothing else seems to please her.

Once raised to the appropriate level, she studies the offerings with a critical gaze before something catches her eye. She gestures with some excitement to one of the upper shelves; the camera follows the gesture and settles on something grand.

It's a rather large pot, shaped with elegant curves and moulding around the rim, painted with abstracted flowers and leaves. The quality is evident.

Shardy makes a faintly dubious noise and zooms in on the price tag.

It's just as high as you might expect.

Shardy isn't exactly poor, but that's a big chunk of change. He whistles through his teeth.

"Oh boy. Your Majesty, you sure about that one?"

The Roselia bristles a little, and nods firmly.

"Look, it's pretty, sure. But it's kinda big for you, maybe? I think maybe that one over there would fit you better-"

Fezzerie lets out an insulted squeal, and stamps her foot.

"Hey, there's a bunch of other really good ones that don't cost three trillion poke, promise. Look- ouch!"

Tired of being sweet-talked out of her expensive tastes, Fezzerie has upped the ante. Tiny purple-tipped spines have popped up across her body, and she is giving Shardy's hand and arm a thorough pummelling with every Poison Point she has.

"Ow ow ow fuck ow fucking fuck that hurts-"

The view blurs and spins as Shardy drops his phone; it lands face down and for a moment everything is black, before it flips back up and spins round to capture the scene. Now that the ghosts are piloting the video quality is infinitely worse, but what's happening is still clear enough.

Shardy is on his knees, clutching his hand; it looks swollen, strangely coloured. Queen Fezzerie III is on the floor again, but she is being backed into a corner by Blue, who is puffed up in furious offense, fur glittering with tiny ice crystals, teeth bared, his cushion forgotten. A woman in Pokemart uniform is approaching with rapid steps, concerned.

"Sir? Sir are you alright?"

"'Sfine," Shardy mumbles. "Blue- careful, don't- don't hurt her. 'Sjust Poison Point, that's not... 'snot deadly, is it?"

"Oh, ouch," the Pokemart employee says, sympathetic but also somewhat relieved. "No, sir, it's painful but we'll go and get you an Antidote and you'll be right as rain- um- well, you should- your hand-"

Her voice drops back into worry as Shardy, who has been trying and failing to get up, lifts a hand that has now swelled to a grotesque size on the end of an arm that's visibly trembling and goes, "Huh."

Then he falls face-first onto the Pokemart floor, and the video cuts out.]

[unamusedyams]

because I am Normal, here's my attempt at giving Kazuma and Ryunosuke pokemon teams.

KAZUMA'S TEAM:

Themes: Samurais/blades ; intimidating and headstrong ; bit of darkness.

Gallade - A Psychic/Fighting type with blades on its elbows. Its Pokedex entries often talk about how it jumps to protect others.

Samurott - A Water type samurai Pokemon like come on. But also could be replaced with Milotic because I want to give him more pretty Pokemon.

Froslass - An Ice/Ghost type mostly for type coverage. The kimono-esque look is a bonus but you could also argue something something icy glare(?)

Runerigus - A Ground/Ghost type. It has the ability Wandering Spirit which reminded me of when he "died" and got amnesia ooo.

Meowscarada - A Grass/Dark cat Pokemon. Initially this was Sceptile for type coverage, but then last minute I wanted to add a cat for Nyasogi. Then I realized Meowscarada is a cat with a mask (Nyasked Apprentice?? >:o) and yeah that's about it.

Kingambit - A Dark/Steel samurai Pokemon this is soooo Kazuma-core✨ Its his ace with Supreme Overload ability let's go.

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

RYUNOSUKE'S TEAM:

Themes: Dragons ; bit of an underdog story ; friendly looking but powerful.

Gyarados - A Water/Flying Pokemon but a blue dragon in spirit. It starting from Magikarp then evolving into a super powerful mon to kinda represent turnabouts. To be honest, I did think of having Palafin for that instead but I think Gyarados' ✨aesthetic✨ fits him better.

Flygon - A Ground/Dragon type for coverage but also he needs more dragons on his team! That's about it really rip.

Maushold - A Normal type mouse Pokemon.... CHUUNOSUKE MY BELOVED. Also FOUND FAMILY (LITERALLY.)

Darmanitan - A Fire/Psychic (zen mode) type based on daruma doll. Hehehe.

Heracross - A Fighting/Bug type I put here because... I have a soft spot for him. He's just a friendly :] guy!! and arguably that's also what Ryuu is. Could also be swapped for Decidueye bc archery or something.

Dragonite - A Flying/Dragon type that's his ace. Its Pokedex entries says that it likes to help people out lost at sea and bring them to shore (metaphors...)

[joelsreligion]

Don't Tell (part 1)┊ dbf!Joel x Reader

(a/n) K this is part 1 of the series :D. This chapter's shorter than what I intend the rest of them to be but I just wanted to set the scene and introduce the characters n what not. The other chapters WILL have smut (how exciting ik) but for rn it's kinda just an intro so bear w me. The next part will be out VERY SOON! K bye. Enjoy!

(Summary) (3.3k) You come back home from college and reunite with your dad, Joel, and Sarah

(Warnings) very minor talk of oral f receiving

It was the middle of June and you had been back home for about a week. You’d just finished your third year of college and was back home for the summer to spend time with your dad. You’ve been far away since you left. Not super far like across the country or anything, but far enough that it became too heavy to drive down from your school to your dads house so often; so you guys settled on weekly video calls and daily phone calls. You missed him though. You guys were super close and he called you every chance he got. He updated you on everything; his hobbies, his friends, the pasta he cooked occasionally, the lake house, and the recent promotion he just got granted. 

You laid back slouched on your couch with your bare feet on the ottoman in front of you; popsicle in one hand and phone in the other. The monotone sound of some commercials filled the room and the window was opened to try and filter out some of the hot air with the cool breeze from outside. It smelled nice. There was a warm, cozy, sitting-outside-by-the-lake tone to the wind that reminded you of past summers you spent fishing with your dad. The sun wasn’t too far away from starting to set and you heard a loud slam of the front door.

“Hey kid c’mere!” your dad yelled from the kitchen

You kicked the ottoman away, set your phone off, and pushed the swinging door open with your free hand. 

“Grab a bag from the car yeah?”

“You went grocery shopping? I thought you said were gonna go to the mail office or something.” 

You put on some sandals by the door and waited for him to set the bags on the counter so he could follow you back out to the driveway. 

“I did. Jus’ figured we could make some burgers ’night n watch the game later. You didn’ have plans did you?” He grabbed two bags from the car and put one in your hand. He walked over to the passenger side, grabbed his phone, and locked the car as he followed you back in the house. 

You didn’t have many friends in your area. All the time you spent here you were hanging out with your dad. All the time you spent at school was spent in study rooms. It’s not that you weren’t social, you were! Sometimes too social. But your dedication to school got the best of you and you often sacrificed your social life for your academic one. 

“Nope” you smiled. This was the first time you guys were getting the chance to do something together. Since you told him your plans to stay home for the summer, he cashed in on all his favors and sick days at work to spend time with you. You were everything to him and he was more than happy to take time off for you. 

You set the bag of vegetables next to the sink and continued working on your ice cream.

“Alright, cool. Hey do me a favor yeah? You wanna water the lawn while I prep the stuff in the backyard?” He subtly tilted his head towards the front of the house and gave you a pleading smile. 

“Dad it’s barely a lawn. It's all yellow. The grass’s dead”

“Which is why it needs to be watered” he counters 

You tilt your head down and look at him with a ‘seriously?’ type of expression. He pretends to read the receipt in his hand to avoid the eye contact.

“We’re inna drought” you try justifying.

“Watering the front lawn once isn’t going to change that fact, kid.”

He put the receipt down on the counter and looked at you with a soft expression.

“Please”

Your mouth morphed into a smile. You were so happy to be home. 

“Fine, just cause you asked nicely.”

You walked out to the side of the house and started to unravel the hose from the faucet. The sun began to set so it wasn’t super hot out, but still warm enough for your shorts and tshirt to feel a little heavy on your body. You turned the faucet on and walked over to what was left of your lawn and began to water it. You kinda got lost in the movements, it was slightly relaxing just to watch the water fall on the patches of grass and tune out your surroundings. As you moved onto the surviving blades of grass next to the sidewalk, you saw a dog run towards you. You were so out of it you didn’t even realize it was Mrs.Moores’ until he jumped up at you and landed with his front paws on your thighs. 

“Hey Moose. What’s up.” You crouched down on the floor and started to rub his belly when he rolled over. Sarah ran towards you with a smile and started to apologize right away.

“Sorry, sorry. He loves you, he can’t help it.”

You laughed and stood up to give her a hug.

“No it’s fine, the feelings are mutual. What’re you doing with Mrs.Moores’ dog?” 

“She’s out of town till Saturday and asked me if I would take him out and just walk him. My dad got home yesterday and wanted to give your dad something so he just came with me around the block” She explained

“Your dads back? Where’d he go?”

“He was down in Houston for a week n a half. He had a job out there he needed to get started and just handed it over to some of his employees.”

Joel and your dad had been best friends since before you were born. They met in middle school and went to the same schools ever since, it was kind of like if their lives merged into one at the age of 13. They had birthdays a week apart, and had kids a couple years apart so they could “grow up together like they did.” Your dad and Joel honesty saw themselves more like family. They hung out so often that you felt like they had more of a social life than you did. You truly didn’t mind though. You loved hanging out with Sarah and you felt lucky to have her as your unbiological (but what felt biological) sister. And you loved seeing your dad with his friend, he laughed more often and it seemed to relieve some of the stress he always carried. 

From the corner of your eye you noticed a familiar, tall and dark featured man walking towards you two. One hand had a level ruler in it and the other hand was swinging at his side. His smile lit up his face and he extended his arms as he got closer to give you a hug.

“Heeyy, look whos home!”

He looked different. His hair was browner and his eyes were darker than you remember. His shoulders framed his torso in a way that made him look threatening and his height didn’t help that thought. He closed his arms around you and your arms reached around his back to try and return the hug. Your breath caught a little in your throat when you felt how muscular his back was. 

“Hey, how are you?” you asked smiling

Joel let go of you and took his place next to Sarah. You couldn’t look away from him. His eyes were so captivating and comfortable and you felt a little flutter in your stomach that you barely noticed. 

“I’m great. Jus’ got home yesterday n wan’ed to return this to your dad,” he held up the ruler “..is he in there?”

“Yeah, he’s in the backyard. He’s making burgers if you guys want any.”

“Oh sick yeah, I’d love one” Sarah mused from Joels side. 

“Yeah go inside, he should be back there. I’ll finish up out here and join you guys inna bit.”  

“Sounds good,” Joel said.

You finished watering the grass, or what was left of it, and wrapped the hose back in its place. Your mind was occupied with thoughts of Joel. Nothing specific, just.. him. His nose, his laugh lines around his eyes, the way his hair fluttered in the cool Texas wind, and his build completely stealing your entire focus. You noticed things about him you never noticed before and he made you feel something he never made you feel before. There was a knot in your stomach and you felt a light blush threaten on your cheeks. 

What the hell’s happening. 

There’s no way you’re.. attracted to Joel?

Noo no, nope. Not Joel, the man that drove you to school in the mornings. The man that hosted your birthday parties in his backyard when your dad had to work. Or the man that gave you your first driving lesson. He’d read you bedtime stories when you slept over his house when you were a child and Sarah couldn’t sleep. Your dads best friend, Joel. No, absolutely not, you can’t. 

In the moment in which you entered your home, washed your hands in your kitchen sink, and as your heart started to race, you made a decision. You cannot have these thoughts for him. It’s so foreign. He was like a surrogate parental figure to you. It would completely mess up your life and everyone elses. It would ruin your dad and you’d lose Sarah, these things you knew for sure. You can’t have feelings for someone that you wouldn’t have the slightest chance of being with, and if that man is someone your dad trusts with his life, then all the more reason to stay away. 

But.

But what if? What are the chances he might’ve had similar thoughts? What if you don’t lose Sarah and what if your dad doesn’t find the fault in that pairing?  

No chance, the rational side of your brain cut in. Anyone with the smallest amount of common sense would be able to see how messed up that is. What if he doesn’t feel the same way? Will he tell your dad if something happens? Can he even see you as someone else besides his daughters best friend? 

No fuck that. You think. I’m not a kid, this is ok. But it isn’t. Every bone in your body is telling you this isn’t ok and you’re trying your hardest to convince yourself that it’s justifiable. 

No, ok. There are no thoughts, there are no feelings, nothing happened. Literally nothing happened. Maybe I was just surprised to see him. I haven’t seen him in 5 years, it could be that. It could be the fact that I haven’t seen him or even thought about him at all…. But god he looked so good. 

Thoughts of his toned arms engulfing your body and his natural musky scent when he hugged you filled your mind. Your skin suddenly had goosebumps and you felt a shiver on your lower spine. You dried off your hands and made your way to the backyard. As you got closer, you could see Joels side profile through the window. He was leaning on the counter behind your dad as he grilled burgers and Sarah played with Moose on the grass. 

You didn’t realize it, but you’d stopped walking. You took in Joels frame and paid attention to every detail to try and paint this moment in your memory forever. The way his brown hair looked golden under the setting sun, his nose bringing your attention to his face and the movement of his lips making you aware of the sudden heat between your legs. You looked at how round and muscular his arms looked under his dark green shirt and you were mesmerized by the way he had his arms crossed below his chest. His legs were also crossed and you noticed your chest start to rise a little faster than you’d like. You felt the same warmth creep up your cheeks and spread down your whole body. You squeezed the back of your couch for some extra stability and tried to slow your breathing. 

You couldn’t look away from him though. It felt like at any moment he might disappear and you wanted to try and remember every detail about him for your own sake. Just then, he felt you staring and looked in the house. 

It was quick.

3 seconds.

 That’s it. 

He looked you in your eyes, quickly glanced his eyes up and down your shape, and then averted his attention back to the conversation with your dad. 

Oh god.

You had to go outside now. Right now. You didn’t want him to think there was any reason you were standing there like a weirdo just staring at him. You found some composure and opened the sliding door out to the backyard. The slightly warm air hit your skin and it suddenly felt too cold to be wearing shorts. Your hair blew back from the sudden exposure and you blinked quickly to try and help your eyes recuperate from the breeze. 

You walked over to your dad and tried your hardest to avoid Joels’ stare on you. You turned your back to Joel and leaned over the grill next to your dad and pretended to be interested in the grilling.

“Are they almost ready?” You asked. You were nervous all of a sudden. Your voice fought back a slight quiver and your hands threatened to tremble. 

“Yeah they’re almos’ done kid. Joel was just about to help me grab some plates, you wanna help?”

“Oh, uhm…” you could feel Joel look at you. The blush on your cheeks and the slight rise of your chest were the only things you noticed. Not really, is what you wanted to say. “..maybe next time. I wanted to talk with Sarah for a bit n catch up.”

Please say ok. Please say ok. Please say ok.

“Alright, I’ll letchu know when they’re done” Your dad said while flipping a burger.

You smiled and pushed away from the grill. You turned around and noticed that it hadn’t just been your imagination, Joel was staring at you. His eyes met yours almost immediately and you were reminded of the heat between your legs. You tried to ignore it though. You didn’t wanna think about it too much. You gave Joel a little smile and tried to act as if nothing had happened. You smiled, he didn’t, he just stared at you. His eyebrows slightly furrowed and the two lines between them made an appearance. His eyes were so soft and delicate but also piercing and endless. You forced yourself to look away from him and set your eyes on Sarah sitting by the pool with Moose. 

You made your way over to her and tried to look as normal as possible. You talked for maybe a couple minutes and then you heard..

“Sarah we gotta get goin’” Joel yelled from the grill. You turned at the sound of his voice and Sarah made a disappointed noise from the floor.

“What? We just got here, the burgers aren’t done yet.” She scratched Mooses’ stomach and you stared at Joel with a slightly confused look, but he didn’t look at you. Your dad was plating the burgers and you wondered if he even noticed what Joel had said.

“Yeah I know, I forgot we had to do somethin’. We’ll come over another day, come on, lets go.” 

He looked uneasy. Not extremely so, but you noticed it. His fists balled in his jean pockets and he looked like he really wanted to leave. Sarah got up from the ground, dusted herself off, and turned to face you.

“Sorry we didn’t get to hangout much today. You can come over tomorrow though if you want and we’ll watch a movie or something.”

“Yeah no problem, I’ll see if I’m free.” You offered a light smile and gave her a hug. You followed behind Sarah as she walked over to her dad and you watched Moose rub up on Joels’ leg. Your dad took a break from the food and walked over to Joel.

“Think about it n let me know alright?” Your dad said, patting Joels shoulder

“Yeah sounds like a nice idea. I’ll letchu know.”

“Let him know what?” Sarah questioned

“Her dad..” Joel nodded towards you “..invited us to the lakehouse next weekend.” He looked at you. Joel looked at you and you looked back at him. He watched you fight off the squirm you tried suppressing and you swore you saw the slightest look of contempt pull at his face. You looked into his eyes for another second but immediately looked away. It was too much, looking at him like this. Your head filled with dirty thoughts of him going down on you and using his fingers to make you beg.  

Shit. 

“It’d be a lot o’ fun man, I haven’t been up there since last summer n it’ll be good for the girls to hangout more y’know?” Your dad said “We could go fishin’, light the fire n what not.”

Your dad was always a little more sentimental than Joel. Joel was hard to read. If you didn’t know him the way you did, you would’ve thought he was a stone-headed smartass who rarely cared about anything. But you did know him. You knew that even though he barely expressed it, he was just as sentimental as your dad and that he loved being around you guys whenever he got the chance. 

“Yeah sounds good. We’ll get together soon and plan it out.” Joel said. 

“I’m so excited ohmygod.” Sarah said with a huge smile. She picked Moose up from the floor and started to rock him back and forth. 

You didn’t say anything. You couldn’t say anything. You felt a little excited, sure, but you didn’t know if it was the best idea to be in a house together with Joel for a couple days given your newfound infatuation. Joel looked at you when he noticed how silent you were and saw you fidgeting with your fingers. 

“You guys should get goin’. Don’t wanna make you late to whatever it is you have to do.” Your dad started to walk out your guests and you stayed back near the grill. They got to the sliding door and Sarah looked back at you. You both smiled and waved and then they walked out of sight. 

When they were gone, your dad finished up the burgers just in time for the game to start. You both walked inside with your food, sat on the couch, and watched the Rangers play the White Sox. You usually liked watching the games with your dad, but you couldn’t focus this time. You were barely hungry and your mind kept wandering off to Joel. 

You thought about how hot you felt under his stare, how his rough calloused fingers might feel guiding your hips to his use, how his mouth might know exactly how to play with your pussy just right to make you so wet and bring you over the edge. 

The warmth between your legs grew into a pulsating mess and you shifted in your seat and squeezed your thighs to try and alleviate the ache. Your dads eyes didn’t leave the tv and you excused yourself to go to the bathroom. You didn’t want to touch yourself. It felt too strange, rubbing yourself to a man you've known your whole life. It felt wrong and outlandish. 

At least I know it’s wrong, you told yourself.

You washed your hands and sat on the hood of the toilet seat for a couple minutes with your head in your hands. 

I’m ok. I’m… I feel ok. I’m fine. You thought

You walked back out to the living room in time to catch the second half of the 4th inning. You took your place next to your dad and tried your hardest to focus on the game. By the 9th inning, you were dozing off to sleep and your dads shoulder supported your head. You fell asleep to the sound of the announcer calling out strikes and the cool breeze rushing over your legs. 

[jils-things]

umm rhys pkmn team ideas 🩶

i had this all sorted out AWHILE back with my friends but figured hey why not archive this thought here ehehehe also im really enjoying my new "style" in infodumping so i like to see more of it

this team doesn't have to be THE canon if it conflicts with the story that the devs plan, but if i had to expand his character a lil bit, this is how it goes!

so rhys is not exactly the kind of champion to focus on one type (i.e: wallace and water types/steven with steel types) but he would be like blue and red who has a variety! except that rhys focuses on two types - ice and steel type.

why ice and steel - well, for one i think those types are super underrated (and i would be lying if i said its not boring to reuse the fire water grass cycle lol) and i kinda the design philosophy in gym leaders how their types reflect their personality in a way. ice types are cool, calm and collected. "chill" if you will. steel types are determined, bold and dare i say potentially misleading (jasmine)

i see rhys as a man who is very calm, humble and sweet (ice) but when time strikes where he must act serious (and its not just battling, say - whatever happened to carmine), he's a stern, almost emotionless man who will do whatever he can do get what's needed.

so these two types bounce off him really well! also, its fun to break the stereotypical "if x is a fighting type then it means they gotta be a martial artist" - no rhys is not a fuckin KNIGHT as a steel type user nor is he wearing A SCARF OR SKI MASK as an ice type user lmao

ok heres the actual team tho

his ace is steelix (courtesy of nero suggesting that and sandslash) i wouldve added lucario but nah that guy is so overrated (and he would absolutely lean on the "he's riley's son" narrative AHDHSDJSJ) so i went with bisharp instead. i also did not want to pick metagross (even if its such a good pick) because..... f/o association AJSHDHSJA

funnily enough some of the 'mons pokedexes had a lot to do with leading a team or showing superiority which is like... haaa... champ privilege SHDGDVSJSHHA

froslass is there because her pokedex says this:

"It freezes hikers who have come to climb snowy mountains and carries them back to its home. It only goes after men it thinks are handsome."

anyways our running gag is that rhys is a handsome motherfucker and everyone is literally a fan of him and this froslass said 👍 /lh

[liverpool-enjoyer]

footballers as pokemon types

OOOOH THIS IS PERFECT FOR MY POKEMON LOVING ASS. requested by @imjusthereforideasagain !! thank you sm for requesting <3

leo: psychic and normal type!! not implying its the reason for his skills, rather the way he hyperfixates on football reminds me a some psychic types. mans is using calm mind 24/7. also normal type, cause i feel like he rlly is Some Guy. hes OBJECTIVELY the goat n has more God given talent in a strand of hair than i do in my entire body, but hes also a dude you bump into at publix while in line for a pub sub.

ney: electric type!!! now if you play/watch pokemon you know pretty much everyone who trains a certain type kinda has a similar personality. ney definitely gives electric type. hes always "!!!" what can i say his personality is jus,,, electric ;))

jordan: hendos a fire type!! as captain he has to inspire his team n be their guiding light in a way,,, n also use will o wisp to burn em when they get outta hand.

virgil: ice and steel type!!! ice cause hes as calm (and cool) as you like. however ice is literally the WORST type in the game defensively, n that aint virgil at all. hes the goat of defenders, an abolute wall. a STEEL wall you could say. like literally there are eighteen types in the game n steel resists ELEVEN of em. i realize this leaves him quad weak to fighting n fire but IGNORE THAT.

luis: the mans a dark type. i love this lil blorbo but the man can play DIRTY. n the dark type is all abt using underhanded tactics to win (its actually called the evil type in the original translation lmao), with literally every move having some secondary effect. and how can i forget: bite is a dark type move (for some reason).

andy: a water type!!! like water takes the shape of its container, man can ADAPT. waters also the most abundant type in the game and has been paired with literally every other type. jus like how andy is friends w every one of his teammates!!

trent: grass type!! now what does trent do (well,,, besides defend). he ASSISTS. he DELIVERS. grass is an AMAZING supportive type, w moves like stun spore, grassy terrain, n how could i forget LEECH SEED??? not to mention cotton guard which literally raises your defense by THREE stages instead a two which is more than any other defense boosting move in the game.

sergio: he is a fighting type. what,,, what more do you want me to say. jus ask mo salah (sorry luv). hes kinda like if you skill swapped gallade to give it the contraty ability n used close combat, where instead of a defense DROP it jus,,, gets better every time.

milly: a rock type!!! hes become quite formidable over the years, n this is way overthinking but it could also parallel how rock type gym leaders tend to be the first you face in the game as theyre meant to show new trainers the ropes, jus like how milly does w the younger players of lfc!! also PLS gimme credit for holding back n not going w the "milly is boring" joke n making him a normal type. cause i did think abt it.

klopp: ok papas a GHOST TYPE. fun fact this is my favorite type in the game n the best in my opinion. anyway. klopp is so intelligent he feels like an old soul, passing on old ass wisdom. he works subtly, like how gengar sneaks around in the shadows before you actually see it. this MIIIIIGHT be (most definitely is) based off @liverpoolfanfiction 's AMAZING supernatural au now that i think abt it.

alisson: a fairy n steel type!!! he is jus,,, THE sweetest, how could i not slap the fairy typing on him. hes the kinda guy who knows his friends are upset based on lil tiny cues, like how the hatterene line detects strong emotions. n hes a steel type for the same reason virgil is. the most defensive type in the game!! resists more than half the fuckin types!! no ones getting through our keeper!!!

[darkx-the-dragon-kn1ght]

Chapter 22- Part 1

So, in order to battle Cain, I want to do at least a bit of level grinding, especially now that the level cap is higher again. I’m thinking Lv. 34-35? That sounds reasonable. Plus, it’s Tuesday, and the Trainer at the Battle Corner today is actually somewhat reasonable from what I’ve looked up, so this should be relatively painless. I’ll be heading to Grand Hall in order to-

…Uuuuh, sorry, am I interrupting something? They’ve got some kinda ritual going on? Cool, okay, I’ll check on that later-

Oh- shoot, new Trainers too? Alright, well, I was gonna rearrange my team at the Grand Hall PC, but I guess I’ll go back to Lapis Ward and do it there real fast.

At any rate, here’s the team I’ll be going with for the time being, and you might notice a familiar face in there as well:

Yup, Bloom’s back! Figured I could use a Grass-type again, and I think Decibel could use a break for now, at least until the level cap’s at a point where she’ll be able to evolve (which will be two Badges from now, based on the level caps displayed on the Trainer Card). Granted, Bloom himself still isn’t at his own full potential and won’t be until I can find a Shiny Stone, but he’s still partially evolved, so it’s an improvement.

For now, I’ve swapped his Rose Incense with the Exp. Share to help with leveling him up to the others’ levels in the coming battles. Though, I have noticed this blonde lady in the corner who wasn’t there last time I was here…who is she?

Okay, this must be something to adjust the game’s difficulty…I think. But despite the chaos we’ve seen so far, I’m not yet at a point where I need to lower the game’s difficulty, so I will not be using this lady’s services.

Alright, random flirting aside, um- what’s this Growlithe doing over here?

Oh- wait, this is Ms. Craudburry’s house, isn’t it? Aha, the police must be here to investigate the robbery- welp, time to get as far away from here as possible! Back to North Obsidia Ward!

What does this guy have to say about the ritual happening in front of him?

Oh, so it’s got something to do with that Link Stone thing people mentioned before- again, I’ll check it out later. Right now, it’s fighting time!

Alright, not too scary- one or two Zen Headbutts should beat it.

I mean, Kirin didn’t level up from that, so…I guess this battle counts as meaningless, since nothing changed? Maybe this second battle will be more meaningful.

Okay, I know where this is going. Into Glare we go!

She’s got Crunch, that’ll make short work of Wonder Guard…even if it tries to hinder her with Confuse Ray.

And this is a job Riptide can handle pretty well.

Ice Fang, here we go!

Man, lots of people flirting with Xera today- and since Cain is around, I doubt that’s gonna fully let up any time soon.

Next

[eridan-ampora]

gotta figure out pokemon types for the ancestors or whatever

handmaid: ok honestly she is an enigma. handmaid understanders where are you

summoner: flying & fairy are options ofc? normal's a contender too

psiioniic: electric, steel, psychic

signless: god damn idk. maybe you just walk in and he gives you the badge. would saying fire type be mean.

disciple: i think fighting would be cool here but there are also just like, so many normal type cats

dolorosa: bug, grass, ice, ghost... she's got some Vibes.

redglare: all i can think is dragon and this is 100% just because of her lusus. unfortunately googling lawyer pokemon has gotten me nowhere. flying? ...salamence & like, unfezant might be kinda neat actually. & then there's also the "justified" ability that mainly fighting types have... hm.

mindfang: bug, psychic, dark, poison

darkleer: ground, rock, steel, dark again,

highblood: okay i know there's actual clown pokemon but i feel like there's More We Could Do With This Guy. ghost?

dualscar: poison? dragon? water? the seahorse pokemon are obvious but i feel like clawitzer kinda fits the vibe too honestly

condesce: water? dark? psychic again??? cmon 😭

[ghostliebites]

self-indulgent TF2 infodump <3

OK so I’m gonna start off with: this is all stuff involving Rookie + a fun TF2 AU I’m doing, it’s not like a canon lore infodump!

Rookie Stuff

alrighty! So last night I finished a proper ref for Rookie, complete with scars n’ everythin’ (yippee!!) and today I’m gonna work on his mimic outfits for each class!! prolly won’t get em all done today but even one or two is a good start for once hehe. I’ve got ideas for a lot of em but I’m better at coming up with stuff as I’m drawing it tbh :P

I!! don’t know!! if I’ve talked about how Rookie’s class works so!! here is an explanation:

BASICALLY the Rookie is the “Ultimate Backup”, he’s WAY more useful in lore TF2 as opposed to game TF2. in the game he’d either be OP or completely useless, broken either way lmao. HOWEVER I HAVE STILL INDULGED MYSELF IN MAKING HIM GAME STATS, VOICELINES, WEAPONS, ETC cuz that’s fun af and I’m tryna make him somewhat useable lmaoo.

ok ok, so Rookie’s class basically mimics the other classes (wait wait, hear me out, please-). he can mimic whichever class is needed, in lore there’s only one of each yk? so with Rookie, any merc can effectively be in two places at once. however Rookie is like a slightly nerfed version of whatever class he mimics, he’s got way less experience than all of them but is a very fast learner. in-game, Rookie would be able to swap his skillset without having to die but it’d have a 20sec cooldown (30 when carrying intelligence) and when mimicking, he has a similar loadout to the class he’s mimicking. HOWEVER he can only customise his base loadout (so just Rookie, not mimicking a class) and his mimic loadouts are fixed, he pretty much has lesser versions of each class’ stock weapons. he also doesn’t get rid of his melee weapon when mimicking and pretty much gains 2 melee options (unless mimicking Heavy, he doesn’t pick up an extra melee then). some mimics come with speed changes, most don’t. Also Rookie’s stock weapons are kinda crap!! but that’s cuz if you’re playing him, why would you not mimic?? then there is no point in playing him!! also his outfit changes to reflect the class he’s mimicking so he’s not a total wild card, the opponent can tell what his skillset is when against him!

ok that was more than I intended to write, maybe I’ll make a post in future more abt Rookie if people are actually interested lmao

Pokemon AU!!

ALRIGHT!!! So I’m making a silly pokemon AU where all the mercs are gym leaders with the exception of Medic who is the pokemon professor and Rookie who is just a guy!! going on his pokerman journey!! Saxton Hale is the pokemon champion and the elite four is the Administrator, Miss Pauling, Maggie and Zhanna. Gray Mann is the “bad guy” and has a whole army of robot pokemon, he feels like it’s his right to be the champion and so plans to take over!! all his pokemon are like robot versions of the gym leader’s strongest pokemon!

oh also Medic has an albino pidove called Archimedes and Sniper has a hoothoot called Sir Hootsalot (naturally). Also all of them have 1 mega besides Medic cuz I love megas and also they’re meant to be a challenge to overcome!! they’re gym leaders and the champion league!! of course they have megas!!

Gym Leader Types + Teams:

Sniper (flying): Pidgeot (mega), Noctowl, Skarmory

Scout (electric): Manectric (mega), Jolteon, Eelektross

Soldier (fighting): Lucario (mega), Conkeldurr, Machamp

Spy (dark): Sableye (mega). Bisharp, Honchkrow

Demo (ghost): Banette (mega), Aegislash, Dusknoir

Pyro (fire): Charizard (mega Y), Heatmor, Arcanine

Engie (steel): Metagross (mega), Bronzong, Excadrill

Heavy (rock): Tyranitar (mega), Gigalith, Golem

Pokemon League Types + Teams:

Saxton Hale (champion): Aggron (mega), Golurk, Pangoro, Drapion, Krookodile, Darmanitian

Administrator (dragon): Garchomp (mega), Hydreigon, Noivern, Haxorus

Miss Pauling (fairy): Mawile (mega), Granbull, Togekiss, Clefable

Maggie (grass): Venusaur (mega), Whimsicott, Breloom, Tangrowth

Zhanna (ice): Abomasnow (mega), Beartic, Mammoswine, Walrein

and then ofc, Rookie has a silly team: Zorua, Meowth, Gengar + Smeargle. he starts off with a Zorua who was his childhood friend and eventually collects the others. all of his team have moves that reflect Rookie’s class in the TF2 universe. Zorua not only can transform but has the move copycat, Meowth has the move assist, Gengar has the move metronome and Smeargle has sketch (which is permanent change but at some point he does sketch the move mimic hehe >:)). and at some point Rookie aquires both a keystone and gengarite so he can mega his gengar yippee!!

final note, Rookie develops a crush on Sniper when he gets absolutely ruined on his first attempt to beat him in a gym battle. Sniper then develops a crush on Rookie when Rookie returns a while later after more training and wins the gym battle :]

[a-tale-of-legends]

So I know I said I would redesign Marlon and I will at some point ( well technically I already have a long time ago lol, but I wanna see if I can do anything different - if not then I'll show y'all his old redesign),BUT! I don't like his team. I think it kinda sucks. It does not feel like a good final gym leader team. So I changed it :D

The one thing I noticed about Marlon is that he seems to really like his bulky water types. So I took that and ran with it. And what's a more fitting bulky water type pokemon than Alomomola! Truthfully, fit a very casual playthrough of pokemon,it's movest might make kids want to tear their hair out, especially when it's naturally so bulky, but I do think at least some challenge is good. Then again, I gave it flip turn, which is not in gen 5 so maybe it'll be easier to deal with since I don't think the so in pokemon battles is that smart in switching pokemon, especially for wish support. But I digress, Alomomola's job is mostly support, rain dance for boosting water moves + swift swim Seismtoad, flip turn for pivoting and wish for more support. And the gym leaders signature move in scald, which I think really fits Alomomola's style ( especially when it gets the burn, further supporting its team mates). I.... probably should have given it a damp rock, but I think it's fine? It's going to be flip turning ( I know, I know, let's just pretend there's modern moves here-) to its other teammates, so if rain stops, then it could always set it up again. Leftovers might be a much, but I didn't know what else to put.

Wailord is one I was silly with. I wasn't 100% sure of what I wanted to do, so I gave it gem boosted water spout, scald bc that's the TM Marlon gives out, and then. Rest and sleep talk. Cause why not. It's very silly, albeit kinda ineffective if Wailords hp is down. Water spout would be null by that point and scald.....well scald wouldn't be bad, but it's a 50/50 chance sleep talk would choose it. Kinda flimsy movest but I. Didn't know. Honestly, looking at it now, bounce probably should have stayed. Yeaaaaaaah, I think it would have worked. And I don't like bounce, but hey. I thought this movest was silly, so why not. Though I will say, rest was kinda playing into that bulky water type thing. Might be counterintuitive with wish though.

Siesmitoad was originally going to be a lead before I realized Alomomola existed. My bias in having a hazard came through here, but when thinking about Marlon as a character I'm not entirely sure if that's his style? I'm not sure lol, but I kept it anyway, with toxic. The rest was easy, liquidation and earthquake being STAB. If rain is still up, this guy is pretty deadly! Probably should have given it a rindo berry tho.

Carracosta was honestly really simple. Shell smash, 3 moves, and a sitrus berry for extra health. I will say, I probably should have used aqua jet, bc this thing is not fast naturally, so it could still die easily. ( Realizing I didn't EV the thing whoops lol). Aqua jet is not as powerful, but the utility of it could be much more useful.

And now for Marlon's ace, Jellicent, which honestly is almost 1 to 1 with his challenge mode(?) variant. The only difference is that I gave him ice beam instead of energy ball,to deal with grass types. I get why Mantine was added in his challenge mode team, but I wanted to stick to the theme here. Plus, Marlon's team was already a " click thunderbolt and win" team, and I wanted to try and disrupt that. And now....well now it's a " click a grass type love and win team" but I do think it's better than before!

And yeah! As you can tell from my ramblings, there's still some improvements to be made with the move slots but I think overall I think I like what I built.

[mrs-starkgaryen]

Well, well, well, dissecting time just so I can remind Maggie that I am in her walls (thanks you've passed your illness onto me)

1. "Afterwards, Mason pulls his clothes back on as you are absentmindedly drawing stars in the steam on the windows of his Chevy Silverado."

A) Even at home, she's dreaming/ thinking about the stars (Hollywood stars)

2. "It was good, not that you finished; you didn’t say anything, he didn’t ask, but even if he had you would have told him not to worry about it. It can take forever, especially with an audience. You’d rather wait until you’re alone."

A) Don't worry baby girl, Aegon is gonna make you finish in front of him and I'll you'll love it

3. Mason smirks and taunts: “I don’t know, with the way you talk about him you sound kind of obsessed.”

A) we all are Mason, shut up

4. “You ever feel like people are the best versions of themselves before you really know them? Then you get too close and all the cracks start showing.”

A) well I didn't like that foreshadowing

B) she's gonna get close to Aegon and we know he's a messed up man 😭

C) I'll she'll still love him though

5. “And it’s only until the end of the year,” your father adds. “Then the vacation is over.” Then the meager allowance they are funneling to you will stop and you will be ordered to return home to pursue an honorable course of existence. You have six months to succeed in Hollywood, or the dream dies."

A) Or when Aegon dies...

B) Maggie, are you in my walls? This is my family 😭

6. “Well, regardless of whatever you have going on in California, you’ll either have to get them done now or after you have children,” Mom says. “I love you and Clara and Tripp, but you destroyed my body. At least doctors can repair breasts. My bladder is still useless."

A) mother? What you doing here, loca?

B) how Sunshine is so sunny, idk. I guess you have to have rain to appreciate the sun

C) no wonder she think she needs plastic surgery- not just for Hollywood but she probably feels like she needs to live up to her parents expectations somehow (cuz she feels like she is disappointing them with her choice of job?)

7. Outside the sun is setting, and you gaze westward as the aging daylight turns the tall green grass and silhouettes of horses to gold like the mines that first brought settlers to California. You slide your phone out of the pocket of your denim shorts and take a photo, then post it to your Instagram story with the caption Home and a smiley face emoji.

A) Sunshines reminder that social media is fake lmao

B) but this is a mood- it gives crying whilst doing a thumbs up picture 😭👍🤳

Also those dogs? I love dogs but these ones are scary! The family and the dogs seem to hate her?! My God. Are they picking up on the family hostility to her?

If they don't shape up, unlike the bats- I won't mind if Jace steps on one of these.. (jk)

8. A minute later, you receive a DM. Aegon has typed: This explains the big horse girl energy

A) Aegon ever heard of playing it cool?

B) damn he's down bad

9. You have just finished ringing up a Like It-sized Apple Pie A La Cold Stone when Josh says: “Hey, there’s an old guy asking for you."

A) oh an old man, imagine if he meant Aegon-

B) HE DID! Mf ain't old

C) I also squealed like she did when I recognised the shoes 🥰

10. When Aegon begins to pull it away, you grab his hand and don’t let go until you’ve licked the spoon clean. He laughs hysterically as he watches you. “I haven’t had strawberry ice cream in forever,” you say.

A) and if I say 👀

B) foreshadowing...

C) also hello Simon Bassett from Bridgerton?

11. “Don’t tell me you’re a vanilla girl.”

A) for now Aegon...

B) He will show her the different flavours

C) also could symbolise that she is kinda naive and then as the story progresses- she's not so sweet anymore 😀

13. “It’s small,” Aegon warns. “It’s an episode of Grey’s Anatomy.”

A) said every man ever 😉😂

B) ooh will she be in season 56, episode 28?

14. “Because once you begin to treat scalpels and needles as prescriptions for everything you don’t like about yourself—or everything that other people don’t like about you—..... that are carving away your humanity one incision at a time. I’ve seen it happen to more people than I could count, and I don’t want it to happen to you. Because you seem very, very human, and I’d like you to stay that way. Which means you don’t cut yourself up because some agent or producer or casting director told you to.” Then he adds, perhaps as an afterthought: “And anyway, you don’t need implants.”

A) did he have to do something to make people (or him) like himself more?

B) omg did his dad make or encourage his siblings/ family to change to become more famous, to carry on his legacy in Hollywood? Did Aemond try and change himself and now he's took a step back into scriptwriting cuz atleast then he can control his own story?

C) she's gonna lose or nearly lose her humanity in this industry, I can see it. It's gonna break her down and then Aegon and her have feel better sex..

15. “Always so agreeable,” Aegon muses. So desperate is more like it.

A).... need I say more

16. “The Chinese zodiac. You’re a horse. So you’re the only horse I like.”

A) you're killing me

B) she's gonna like riding this horse 😭 (I'll let myself out)

17. His face is some amalgamation of emotions you can’t read, and this is unusual.“Why do you think I paid in cash?”

A) either becca is crazy

B) or his family are and they'll update becca

C) or both. Like I said before- maybe they set him up wirh becca to calm him down, to make him (the targaryens) look good in the papers

18. “I got you a vanilla latte, vanilla girl.”

A) a possible other nickname?

B) all her nicknames are cute and sunny, like her until this industry snuffs it out 😀

19. Then you are in the scenes under intensely radiant artificial light, and just like it did in your roles back in Minnesota, the real world vanishes and all that exists are these characters, these moments, and your body and mind become theirs, and perhaps even your soul too. Your husband is handsome and kind, and here in this liminal fictional space you love him, and when the surgeons wheel him off to the operating room you are full of blind naïve surety. Then the doctors update you on his condition and you are still hopeful, but it becomes a fragile thing, like something that shatters when it’s dropped from a height. And then he is dead, he has been taken away from you, he has been stolen, and you are eclipsed by a blood-red wrath that is animalistic and unforgiving. After each take when you are ripped back through the veil and into reality, you can’t remember exactly what you did or said, and the director doesn’t have many critiques so you aren’t sure how it’s going.

A) This whole thing felt like a summary for the story

B) at first she's whisked away in a world of Hollywood: glitter and glammer. She's "full of blind naive surety"..

C) Then it's she's less so but she still tries to be optimistic? As she realises this is not what she signed up for

D) husband is dead, Aegon is dead? Then she's full of rage

E) under artificial light? The Hollywood spotlight..

F) she starts to give them her body (plastic surgery), her mind (she starts to doubt and panic in fame) and then her soul (Hollywood kills her optimism and dream)

Also- Are the eyeshadows representing things?

A) In the first chapter she had shimmery, pink, warm brown eyeshadow (showing that she is warm, positive and sparkling with a dream, it's all new).

B) when she's with Mason, it's sparkly black. Like she's not 100% with him but that's okay because she still has her dream that she's gonna be able to be an actress and subconsciously be with someone better...

C) in the ice cream shop, she has bright pink- so bright in optimism still and pink meaning flirtatious feelings for Aegon?

Idk, all this is my crazy mind and I love whatever you come out with!

A Curse [Chapter 2: Harbor Gateway]

A/N: Thank you for the warm welcome you have given this series!!! I am sick with bronchitis currently so this has been a big bright spot in an otherwise miserable week 😅 I can't wait to show you where this story is going, I hope you're ready for it 🥰💜

Series summary: You are an aspiring actress. Aegon is a washed-up and disenchanted agent...at least until he sees something special in you. But within paradisical seaside Los Angeles you find terrible dangers and temptations, secrets and lies. Maybe Aegon's right; maybe the City of Angels really is a curse.

Chapter warnings: Language, a tiny bit of sexual content (18+ readers only), age-gap relationship, entertainment industry misogyny, some body dissatisfaction/dysmorphia, ice cream, judgmental parents, aggressive Akitas, we're literally in Minnesota!!!

Word count: 6.1k

💜 All my writing can be found HERE! 💜

Tagging: @lauraneedstochill @mrs-starkgaryen @chattylurker @neithriddle @ecstaticactus, more in comments! 🥰

🏝️ Let me know if you’d like to be added to the taglist 🏝️

Afterwards, Mason pulls his clothes back on as you are absentmindedly drawing stars in the steam on the windows of his Chevy Silverado. On the other side of the glass is inky Minnesota night, a full moon dissolving away, glowing freckles of constellations. You’re staying with your parents and Mason has roommates, so the truck was the expedient choice. It was good, not that you finished; you didn’t say anything, he didn’t ask, but even if he had you would have told him not to worry about it. It can take forever, especially with an audience. You’d rather wait until you’re alone.

Mason glances down at the used condom on the floor of his Silverado, hastily discarded, viscerally slick in a way that becomes sickening in the letdown, as the endorphins and the adrenaline slip away and the blood pumps slow and unclouded. He smirks as he asks: “You sure you don’t want to get back on the pill?”

You sigh, drawing another star. You are still naked and sprawled across the back seat, glistening with sweat in the moonlight. “Well I tried three different prescriptions and had three miserable experiences, and I’m really not interested in playing side effect roulette again. And I can’t risk my skin going insane and random bleeding when I’m running around all over L.A. trying to get parts.”

“What about that little sperm assassin T-shaped thing?”

You look at him. “An IUD?”

“Yeah.”

You wince, engraving another star into the steam on the window. “I don’t think I like the idea of having a piece of metal shoved up inside me.”

He laughs. “But you’ll get silicone implants?”

You shrug; you can’t deny the irony. “I don’t need an IUD to be an actress.”

“Look, I’m not complaining about the tits thing,” Mason says, holding up his hands. “Obviously I’d enjoy them too. And you’d still have them when you move home, so it’s not a waste even if the acting thing doesn’t work out.”

You already know he feels this way, and yet still, it hurts. “When I move home?”

He smiles and crawls back on top of you, his Carleton College hoodie whispering against your belly and chest, soft royal blue cotton on damp skin. He had been a Political Science and International Relations major who took Theater Arts 195: Acting Shakespeare for an arts credit. He was beyond terrible and had no appreciation for the field whatsoever, but he was tall and strong and jolly, an earnest corn-fed Midwestern boy, and when one day after class he’d asked if he could take you to Culver’s for a burger and frozen custard, you’d said yes.

Here and now, in the back seat of his Chevy Silverado, Mason kisses your forehead. Then he ghosts his thumb over the ridge of your orbital socket and cheekbone, where your dark glittery eyeshadow has smudged like a spreading bruise: Galaxy by Anastasia Beverly Hills, Elysian by Natasha Denona. “I’m not saying you aren’t good. But how many people on this planet get to be movie stars? It’s just not realistic. And it’s about so much more than talent. It’s about who you know, and luck, and chemistry, and looks, and a bunch of other things that are mostly out of your control. You’re never going to be the type of girl who’s an influencer or winning Miss America, you’re just not. But that doesn’t mean you aren’t very, very pretty. And I loved you anyway.”

Loved, past tense. You and Mason stopped using that word a year ago; now the nostalgia is painting memories like the walls of an old house. His memories, anyway. You sit up and start yanking on your clothes: oversized yellow Santa Monica crewneck, black sweatpants with elastic cuffs at the ankles. “I think I’m going to get the gummy bear implants.”

Mason licks his lips. “Yum.”

“They’re a type of silicone, but they’re supposed to feel more natural and be less dangerous if they rupture.”

“Will you have scars?” he says as if the notion has just occurred to him, troubled, perhaps a little revolted.

“Well yeah, they have to end up under my skin somehow.”

Mason shudders, then he has another thought. “Who’s going to take care of you after surgery when you’re all sore and zonked out on opioids?”

“My roommate Baela said she would. She’s had friends who have gone through it already.”

“Okay, good. I wouldn’t want you to be alone out there.” Mason touches the back of your head, a quick fond gesture. He’s the only man you’ve ever been with, and even that took a while, months of trying to envision him undressing you before you were sure you could do it without flinching, without being afraid or shy or bewildered. But in the end it had been easy, always easy, which is why you keep coming back to him like a comet. Your elliptical orbit takes you far away and then close again, and such natural patterns are effortless to keep.

You say, the edges of your lips curling into a furtive smile: “I’m definitely not alone.”

Mason groans. “You’re going to hook up with that new agent guy, aren’t you?”

“What? No! No way, he has a fiancée.”

He rolls his eyes, but he’s more amused than annoyed. “Okay, whatever.”

“You know I don’t date anyone.” Which is why each time you’re home visiting, Mason gets a text: Want to get lunch at Culver’s? or Can you drive me to Target? or Pick me up around 9 p.m.?

Mason smirks and taunts: “I don’t know, with the way you talk about him you sound kind of obsessed.”

“I’m just grateful. Someone finally gave me a chance.” You look to the window; the steam and your hand-drawn stars have evaporated away. “And yeah, he’s interesting and he’s cute, and he’s kind of mean but then unexpectedly caring sometimes, and I think he’s one of those people who are really good at what they do but only when they’re inspired…but that doesn’t mean I’m into him romantically.” A pause. “And even if I was, there’s no harm in a super-secret, one-sided crush.”

“Okay. Have fun with all the adulterous sex.”

You chuckle. “Thanks, but that is not the plan.” You slip on your flip-flops, shimmy out of the back seat, and trot around the Silverado to the passenger’s door. Mason climbs into the driver’s seat and turns his key in the ignition. You ask: “What happened to that ballerina girl who was in your Instagram stories for a while?”

“Had to ghost her, she got super clingy and controlling. She was texting me at work all the time and got pissed off when I was putting a ton of hours into that election thing for CNN.” Mason is a political analyst. He turns to you. “You ever feel like people are the best versions of themselves before you really know them? Then you get too close and all the cracks start showing.”

“I think people are wonderful. You just have to find the ones you click with.”

“I should have figured you’d say something like that.” He steers his truck out of the otherwise empty parking lot in Lac Lavon Park. “I’m looking forward to you being home again.”

“I’m not.”

You both laugh, and then Mason drives you to your parents’ house.

At the dining room table, Mom and Clara are researching wedding venues, vast countryside estates and metropolitan historic hotels. Clara got engaged two weeks ago during a vacation to Turks and Caicos. In the living room, Dad and Tripp are watching commentary on the NBA Finals. Tripp’s name isn’t really Tripp; he is the third James in a row, named after your father and grandfather, and Tripp is short for triple. All over the house, there are Akitas lolling in plush dog beds and clicking around on Brazilian Cherry hardwood floors. They have faces like teddy bears, but their dark eyes track you mistrustfully, as if you are an intruder.

No one asks where you have been. They barely acknowledge that you are back. “Hello, dear,” your mother calls distractedly from the dining room, and that’s all. You jog upstairs to the bathroom you share with Clara before anyone can notice your smeared makeup and the unsavory post-car-sex sweat gleaming on your skin. You get into the shower, turn on water so hot it is nearly scalding, and close your eyes. With your back pressed to the jade green tiles, your hand wanders down over your belly and stops between your legs. Your mind cycles through fantasies, but nothing seems to be working.

It’s not real. It can’t hurt anybody.

You imagine that Aegon is the one touching you, and in under a minute it’s over.

~~~~~~~~~~

“I want there to be horses,” Clara says, scrolling through her phone and ignoring the food on her plate: roast chicken, homemade mashed potatoes, green beans sauteed in garlic and olive oil, panzanella salad. Mom prepared it all herself, not because there was no help available—your parents have a housekeeper named Angela who comes by several days per week—but to prove she could. In the living room are shelves heavy with books by Martha Stewart, Ina Garten, Cat Cora, Julia Child, Nigella Lawson. You hear echoes of ambient clicking, Akitas meandering down hallways and staircases.

“Horses?!” Tripp replies with a mouthful of mashed potatoes, gesturing to the sliding glass door. “Don’t you get enough horses in your everyday life? Don’t you have like five right out there?” Your parents’ house sits on ten acres of land, including a barn and several paddocks for Clara’s rescued Thoroughbreds.

“I want beautiful horses,” Clara insists. “Unusual, photogenic, so they can be in the background of all the photos. Maybe Friesians or Haflingers?”

“I’m not sure we can sort the venues by types of horses available, dear,” Mom says. All that’s on her own plate is a heap of green beans and a few pieces of skinless white meat chicken.

Clara moans and drops her face into her hands. “It’s so overwhelming!”

“You’ll find a place you like, Clara Bear,” Dad says mildly, painstakingly slicing meat off a drumstick with his fork and knife.

“And Owen is no help at all. Every time I ask for his opinion he just tells me to do whatever I think is best, but I don’t know what’s best, that’s why I’m asking him!”

Your mother pats Clara’s shoulder reassuringly. “Guys don’t care about weddings,” Tripp says, twisting around in his chair to see the television in the living room. On a rerun of E! News, the hosts are discussing Chris Hemsworth’s rigorous fitness regime and Meghan Trainor’s “mommy makeover.” You peek under the tablecloth. One of the Akitas, Yuki, is glaring as she waits for you to drop something for her to eat.

“You could do something like that,” Mom says to you, and you realize you haven’t been listening to the conversation.

“Sorry, do what?”

“You could be a wedding planner or a real estate agent. Those are actual careers, but there’s more creativity involved, isn’t there? And didn’t you take a design class in college? That would certainly come in handy.”

“Hm,” your father says with a frown, still dissecting his chicken. He would rather you go to law school like Tripp. You would rather lie down in traffic.

“I took a set design class, Mom. Because I was studying how to be an actress. And that’s what I’m doing right now in Los Angeles, trying to be an actress.”

“You could become an architect!” Mom bursts out with sudden enthusiasm. “Wouldn’t that be fun?”

You titter evasively. “I can’t draw, Mom. Or use the modeling software, or do math.”

“You know, you don’t need any specific degree to get into law school,” Tripp says, and your father gives him a nod of approval. “You could have majored in dance or bagpiping or Egyptology, it doesn’t matter. All they want is a high undergrad GPA and a 168+ LSAT score, and I bet you could get that if you studied. You can even retake the test a few times if you need to.”

“Why do you do that?” Clara snaps at him. You eat your panzanella salad and pretend not to be listening. Beneath the tablecloth, Yuki growls. You toss her a few cubes of Italian bread so she won’t bite you.

Tripp shovels mashed potatoes into his mouth. “Do what?”

“Why are you always wasting your time trying to convince her to grow up and get a real job? If she wants to embarrass herself, let her. I have problems that I’m trying to solve, so how about applying yourself to those instead?”

“Are you serious? You think I should be calling around to wedding venues asking about their selection of exotic draft horses?”

Clara aggressively stabs at her green beans with her fork. “Fuck off, Tripp.”

“Hey, hey, kids, no swearing,” your mother says. “It’s Father’s Day. Be respectful.”

Dad turns to you. “You could be an entertainment lawyer, how about that? You could work in intellectual property or negotiating contracts.”

You smile warily. “I’ll think about it, Dad.”

Clara says to your parents: “Well I hope all the money you’re throwing out the window to support her in California isn’t coming out of my wedding fund.”

You close your eyes and think: I can’t spend my life in a cubical. I can’t spend every minute of every day trying to forget who I am.

“Shh, shh,” your mother pleads, rubbing the back of Clara’s clenched hand. “You will get exactly what we promised you, that amount is still set aside for your wedding. Nothing she does affects you.”

“And it’s only until the end of the year,” your father adds. “Then the vacation is over.” Then the meager allowance they are funneling to you will stop and you will be ordered to return home to pursue an honorable course of existence. You have six months to succeed in Hollywood, or the dream dies.

Your father is now asking Tripp about his summer associate position at Latham & Watkins in Chicago. Your mother is advising Clara to get a wedding dress with a corset back so it can be adjusted in the event she gains or loses weight at the last minute. Underneath the table, Yuki is growling again; she noses your knees threateningly.

“I got an agent,” you say, and everyone looks at you.

“Really?” Mom asks, sounding a little perplexed.

“Who is it?” Dad says.

“Aegon Targaryen. He has a small office in Elysian Park.”

“Oh, I think I recognize the last name.”

“His family is in the industry.” You are beaming; you can feel the heat rising in your face. “But Aegon kind of does his own thing and tries to stay out of the limelight. He was an actor when he was my age. And I guess he thinks I can get roles, so that’s really exciting.”

Your mother seems concerned as she nibbles at a shred of white meat. “Is he an older man?”

“Not that much older. He’s thirty-five.”

“Well, be careful, darling,” your father says gravely. “Who knows what his intentions are.”

Clara evidently agrees. “Men can be so creepy. I had this one professor in pharmacy school who cheated on his wife with one student, then cheated on her six months later with a different student. And then he retired to Boca Raton and was never heard from again.”

“Oh, that reminds me!” Tripp says to your father. “We read about Clinton v. Jones in torts class, it was wild, I didn’t know he was such a freak even before the Monica Lewinsky thing…”

After dinner, while your father and Tripp are flipping through television channels in the living room and Clara is upstairs on the phone with Owen, you go to the kitchen where your mother is washing dishes in a bubble-filled sink. Again, she doesn’t have to do this; Angela will be here to clean the house tomorrow. But it’s part of being a perfect homemaker, and if she’s not good at this then she’s not good at anything.

She glances over when she hears you come in. “Did you get an appointment with one of the doctors your father recommended?”

“I did, yeah. I have a consultation on Friday.” You lean against the marble countertop and cross your arms so you don’t fidget nervously. From a dog bed on the floor, Mochi glowers at you. “Do you think I should get the surgery?”

She shrugs; you’re not certain if she is more indecisive or apathetic. “Your cousin Madison had a nose job the summer before college. Your old classmate Emma got a blepharoplasty and then met her husband three months later. Practically all of my friends have had breast augmentations, and I’ve certainly never regretted mine. I think if you’re going to get anything fixed, it makes sense to pick that.”

You try again to elicit a strong opinion, whether an endorsement or objection. “I don’t think I’d want to do it if I didn’t feel like it was necessary to be an actress.”

“Well, regardless of whatever you have going on in California, you’ll either have to get them done now or after you have children,” Mom says. “I love you and Clara and Tripp, but you destroyed my body. At least doctors can repair breasts. My bladder is still useless.”

You stare at Mochi distractedly. The dog huffs, unwelcoming. “What was the recovery like?”

“Oh, hell,” your mother says. “But once you heal up it’s worth it. I can wear square necklines and strapless dresses again.”

“Technically, you could have worn whatever you wanted.”

She gives you an impatient look, a you’re too old for that sort of frustration. “No one wants to see some sad flabby woman.” She is including your father in this statement. You remember being home for Thanksgiving Break during your freshman year at Carleton and inadvertently stumbling upon emails from one of the hospital interns when you used his laptop to buy movie tickets: indecent inuendoes, flirtatious photos, no smoking gun but certainly more than was appropriate between colleagues. You had tried to tell your mother, and she had deflected over and over again until you realized that she didn’t want to know; it was easier to be carried by the currents of momentum than to rock the boat until it sank. “This agent of yours…is he celebrating Father’s Day with his family?”

“No, Aegon lost his dad when he was in college.”

“That must have been difficult,” she says vaguely as she scrubs a pot with a green Scotch-Brite dish wand. Your parents are now at the age when their friends have begun to succumb to strokes and heart disease and cancers, and the lurking specter of mortality both horrifies and fascinates them. “What did he die of?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Mom?!” Clara shouts from upstairs. “Osaka is puking in the hallway!”

Your mother sighs and dries her hands on a dish towel, then leaves you alone in the kitchen. You linger there for a while, listening to the faint drone of CNN from the living room television, then leave the house through the sliding glass door in the dining room. Outside the sun is setting, and you gaze westward as the aging daylight turns the tall green grass and silhouettes of horses to gold like the mines that first brought settlers to California. You slide your phone out of the pocket of your denim shorts and take a photo, then post it to your Instagram story with the caption Home and a smiley face emoji.

A minute later, you receive a DM. Aegon has typed: This explains the big horse girl energy

You laugh and respond: They belong to my sister, I am personally very anti-horse

You hope he’ll continue the conversation. You don’t have to wait long. How’s Minnesota? Aegon asks.

You stop and consider how to answer, then decide not to overshare. Devoid of palm trees…but good!

There is a pause—perhaps thirty seconds—and then Aegon types: How’s the ex-boyfriend?

Is he curious or jealous? You smile. Still not standing in the way of anything :)

Aegon reacts with a heart emoji, then immediately switches it to a thumbs-up. You cannot ignore the wave of warmth and fondness and exhilaration that overwhelms you. Logically, you know he’s engaged to another woman. Emotionally, it doesn’t seem relevant.

You think: It’s just a crush. It can’t hurt anybody.

Then you remember what your mother asked, and as you stand outside in the fading dusk light you Google Aegon’s father Viserys Targaryen. He has his own Wikipedia page. You scroll to the bottom, where it reads in nondescript black letters: On October 27, 2009, Targaryen passed away at his Malibu residence after a long illness.

~~~~~~~~~~

You have just finished ringing up a Like It-sized Apple Pie A La Cold Stone when Josh says: “Hey, there’s an old guy asking for you.”

“What?” You look towards the ice cream freezer and there he is, dark jeans, green Nike Killshots, a yellow Hawaiian shirt that’s too big for him. “It’s my agent!” you shout as you rush over to meet him, loud enough that everyone in the shop turns to stare.

“Shh,” Aegon says, but he’s laughing.

“What are you doing here?” you ask from behind the counter.

“I got some good news, and I wanted to tell you in person.”

“Cool! Should I make you ice cream first?”

“Um, sure.” Aegon surveys the menu of Signature Creations. He seems overwhelmed; he actually looks a little panicked.

“Are you usually a chocolate or vanilla person? Or peanut butter, or coffee? Or mint?”

“Strawberry,” Aegon says.

“Strawberry,” you echo, surprised. “Okay, I think you’ll like Our Strawberry Blonde.”

“Neat.”

“Because, you know, it has strawberries and you’re blonde.”

“Sounds literally perfect for me,” Aegon says, smiling.

“What size?”

“Uh…” He reads the labels on the cups in the display case. “The big one.”

“No, you have to say the real name.”

He chuckles. His cheeks are pink, his turbulent blue eyes sparkling. “I’m not saying that.”

“Then I’m not making you ice cream!”

He groans. “I want an Our Strawberry Blonde in the size Gotta Have It.”

“Cup, cone, or waffle cone bowl?”

“Stop asking me questions or you’re fired.”

“Waffle cone bowl,” you decide. Aegon studies you as you work, his head tilted thoughtfully to the side: scraping a mound of strawberry ice cream out of the freezer with your metal spatulas, taking it to the cold countertop, and smashing in graham cracker pie crust, caramel, fluffy whipped topping, and fresh strawberries. You use one of the spatulas to expertly scoop the mixture into a waffle cone bowl, not spilling a drop. Then you hand Aegon his ice cream and ring him up at the cash register. He pays in cash.

You ask Josh, the manager on duty, if you can take your fifteen-minute break now. He frowns. “I thought you were going to refill the yellow cake and Oreo cookie mix-ins first.”

“Hey,” Aegon says. He waves a ten-dollar bill in the air to show it to Josh and then dunks it in the tip jar. “Do it yourself.”

“Fine,” Josh mutters to you. “But you don’t get a second over fifteen minutes.”

There’s no time to waste. You hurry to a small table by the window. It’s 8:30 p.m., and outside the world is indigo-dark and threaded with inorganic sparks of headlights, streetlights, kaleidoscopic neon signs. Your eyeshadow is vibrant and pink, because no one cares about that when you work at an ice cream shop: Push by Natasha Denona, Coax by Urban Decay.

Aegon takes his first taste of his ice cream as he sits down in the chair across from you. “You were right, this is delicious. A bop, not a flop.” Then he notices the bruise on your right wrist. “What the hell happened to your hand?”

“Oh. One of the Akitas bit me. Don’t worry, I can cover it up with concealer.”

Aegon is irritated. “Why is your mother letting her Akitas bite you?”

“It was my fault. I forgot that Oni doesn’t like when people pet his feet.”

Aegon sighs, stirring his Our Strawberry Blonde. “You want some of this?”

“I can’t,” you say reluctantly.

He raises an eyebrow. “What do you mean you can’t?”

“I already had a little cup when I got here this afternoon so I have regrettably hit my ice cream quota for the day.” And then, when Aegon clearly does not approve: “I try not to restrict too much but obviously staying the same size takes effort. That’s not a disorder, it’s just reality.”

Aegon seems to debate arguing, then instead scoops up a heaping spoonful of ice cream and holds it out across the table. “Come on. It doesn’t count if it’s on my spoon.”

You smile sheepishly and open your mouth for him. Your lips close around the plastic spoon: coldness, sweetness, the grit of pulverized graham cracker pie crust, the infinitesimal black seeds of strawberries that catch between your teeth. When Aegon begins to pull it away, you grab his hand and don’t let go until you’ve licked the spoon clean. He laughs hysterically as he watches you. “I haven’t had strawberry ice cream in forever,” you say.

“Don’t tell me you’re a vanilla girl.”

“I am,” you confess. “I know the joke. But I really do always get the vanilla-adjacent flavors. Cookie dough, French vanilla, sweet cream, cheesecake…”

Aegon smirks playfully. “Pathetic.”

“So you’re an enlightened being because you eat strawberry ice cream.”

“Boring people like vanilla. Kids like chocolate. Interesting adults like strawberry.”

“Do you actually have good news for me or did you just come here to be a ghoul?”

“I got you a part.”

“What?!” you squeal, and people are gawking again. This time, Aegon doesn’t tell you to be quiet. “Seriously?”

“Seriously,” he replies, grinning like he can’t help it.

“A part in what?”

“It’s small,” Aegon warns. “It’s an episode of Grey’s Anatomy.”

You scream; Josh scowls at you from behind the counter. “Oh my God, no way, no way!”

“You’re going to be the wife of a guy the doctors kill with negligence. Three scenes, two are pretty short and unremarkable but then you get to yell at the surgeon in the last one. Gives you the opportunity to show some range and make an impression.”

You can’t believe this is happening. “They aren’t going to make me audition first?”

“Well…it’s very last-minute,” Aegon says. “The actress who was supposed to do it has a drug problem or something, I guess, so she ghosted and they were scrambling for a replacement. And I completely fabricated your credentials.”

“What? Really?”

“Yeah, I typed up a resume and sent it over and they loved it. So try not to talk about your actual experience because none of it will match.”

You shake your head, stunned, amazed. “What if they try to contact one of my alleged former employers?”

“Then they’ll be talking to Aemond, and he will lie and say you were an absolute pleasure to work with.”

Aemond Targaryen: Aegon’s younger brother, a screenwriter, a philanthropist, a well-respected entity in Hollywood, and you know this from the Googling that preceded your first meeting with Aegon last week. “And Aemond doesn’t mind helping you commit fraud?”

“It’s not a favor I call in very often.” Aegon finishes his ice cream, then begins breaking apart the waffle cone bowl and shoving shard-like pieces into his mouth.

“When’s the shoot?”

“Very very early on Thursday, that’s the bad news.” Thursday is two days from now. “So I’ll have to pick you up at your apartment at like 5 a.m.”

“That’s fine. I’ll be ready.”

He smiles, gnawing on a chunk of his waffle cone bowl. “I figured.”

“You’re going too?” The hope is unmistakable in your voice.

“Of course I’m going.”

“I didn’t think agents usually went to film shoots.”

“Well, fortunately for you, your agent is imminently fleeing Los Angeles and has already parted ways with most of his clients and really has nothing else going on besides hiding in his office and playing a Nintendo 64, so I figured I could make it. And also if I’m going to be enthusiastically recommending you to people, I should probably see you work at some point.”

You wiggle your eyebrows flirtatiously. “Do I get to make out with my fake husband?”

Aegon is amused. “From what I understand, you get to chastely kiss him once. They’re sending the script over to my office first thing in the morning, so you’ll only have a day to learn your lines.”

“That’s enough time. I’ll make it work.”

“Always so agreeable,” Aegon muses. So desperate is more like it.

Thursday. “Is the shoot just one day?”

“Yeah, they should be able to get everything they need from you on Thursday morning. Why?”

“I have a doctor’s appointment on Friday and I was just wondering if I’d have to reschedule it.”

Aegon is immediately vigilant. “What kind of appointment?”

“Uh…” You smirk guiltily. “It’s just a consultation. No slicing yet.”

“And you’re going to cancel that,” Aegon says flatly.

“Seriously?”

“Do you want implants because you want them or because you think other people want you to have them?”

You hesitate. “Both.” That’s probably a lie.

Aegon leans back in his chair and studies you. “Yeah, you’re cancelling that appointment.”

“Why?”

“Because when I agreed to sign you, you told me that you’d do anything I say. And I’m telling you to cancel it.”

“But why don’t you want me to get implants? Everyone gets implants.”

“Because once you begin to treat scalpels and needles as prescriptions for everything you don’t like about yourself—or everything that other people don’t like about you—it’s very difficult to stop. First it’s your tits, then it’s your eyes and your nose, then it’s your chin and your cheeks and your neck and your ass, and it’s just this revolving door of painful, dangerous, unnecessary procedures that are condemning you for being mortal, that are carving away your humanity one incision at a time. I’ve seen it happen to more people than I could count, and I don’t want it to happen to you. Because you seem very, very human, and I’d like you to stay that way. Which means you don’t cut yourself up because some agent or producer or casting director told you to.” Then he adds, perhaps as an afterthought: “And anyway, you don’t need implants.”

You smile, then reply quietly: “You’ve never seen me.”

Aegon grins. “I don’t care if you have twelve nipples under there like a fucking beagle, you don’t need plastic surgery.”

You both laugh, and the tension evaporates, and even if you don’t cancel the appointment—Aegon is one person, the entertainment industry is omnipotent and eternal—you are glad he seems to like you the way you are. Behind the counter, Josh is waving manically to get your attention and summon you to return to work. You pretend not to see him.

Aegon asks: “Why don’t you like horses?”

“They freak me out. They’re all teeth and legs and they’re huge, I’m always scared they’ll step on me.”

“Your dad’s a doctor, right? I thought all rich girls had horses.”

“Where I’m from, a lot of women ride horses to distract themselves from the fact that their husbands are riding their receptionists or interns. I’d rather have no horse and no awful cheating husband.” And Aegon stares at you and turns serious, because perhaps you’ve inadvertently addressed the elephant in the room: he has a fiancée, and neither of you are acting like she exists. You swiftly pivot. “I’ll make an exception for you, though.”

He appears startled. “What?”

“The Chinese zodiac. You’re a horse. So you’re the only horse I like.”

“Oh, yeah. Right.” Aegon chuckles uneasily and gets up to throw his trash away, then stands under the florescent lights with his hands in his pockets, his blonde hair falling out of its gel and hanging over his forehead. He gazes down at you pensively; you are still seated at the table. “When does your shift end?”

“I’m closing tonight, so I’ll be done around 10:30 or 11.”

“Okay. Can I come back to pick you up and drive you home?”

You are puzzled. “Why?”

He gestures to the inky dark window, incredulous. “Because obviously you shouldn’t be walking alone in Harbor Gateway at midnight? You know there was a shooting a block from here last week. I looked it up.”

“I walk home all the time.”

“You really need to stop doing that.”

“You are being very dramatic for a non-actor.”

“Listen, I can’t go to my house and try to fall asleep while I’m wondering if you’re getting mugged or murdered.”

You look at Aegon. He does seem genuinely worried. “You can drive me home.”

“Great. See you in two hours.” He strides away and shoves open the glass door; the little metal bells hanging there jingle.

“Aegon?”

He halts mid-step and turns around. “Yeah?”

“Does Becca know where you are right now?”

His face is some amalgamation of emotions you can’t read, and this is unusual.“Why do you think I paid in cash?”

And before you can reply, he’s gone.

~~~~~~~~~~

On Thursday, June 19th, Aegon picks you up in his white Chrysler Sebring convertible while the city is still asleep. The sky is dark, the streetlights passing by overhead, infinite pinpoint supernovas. There are hardly any other cars on the road. Aegon’s hair is a mess and his eyes are bleary; he’s sipping a Starbucks coffee with one hand and holding the steering wheel with the other. He is wearing a suit, but he still manages to look unpolished, his white shirt half-untucked and his black tie too skinny. He sets his coffee down in one of the cup holders and passes you something venti-sized and iced.

“I got you a vanilla latte, vanilla girl.”

“Aw, thanks! Skim milk?”

“Nope,” he says, smiling. You smile back and take a gulp of it, cold and sweet and bracing. “What’s your hype song?”

“I can’t tell you,” you say, embarrassed.

“Why not?”

“You’re going to terrorize me.”

“Don’t Stop Believing? Don’t Stop Me Now? I Gotta Feeling?”

“Lose Yourself.”

Aegon throws back his head and cackles, his hair flying in the wind. “That’s definitely a fireable offense. I’m ditching you the second we finish this shoot.” But he taps around on his phone and plugs in the aux, and then Eminem is thudding through the speakers as the Sebring sails north and the red-gold dawn rises on the horizon, a celestial message from the East Coast, an omen from the future.

Aegon drives you to Prospect Studios in Los Feliz, just east of Hollywood. Filming will be indoors on a soundstage. You spend what feels like forever in hair and makeup, and the costume designer—who had prepared for a different actress—dresses and redresses you over and over again, frowning at your chest and waist and thighs, and you have a sudden pang of nauseating panic and dread: I don’t belong here. What the fuck was I thinking?

Then you are in the scenes under intensely radiant artificial light, and just like it did in your roles back in Minnesota, the real world vanishes and all that exists are these characters, these moments, and your body and mind become theirs, and perhaps even your soul too. Your husband is handsome and kind, and here in this liminal fictional space you love him, and when the surgeons wheel him off to the operating room you are full of blind naïve surety. Then the doctors update you on his condition and you are still hopeful, but it becomes a fragile thing, like something that shatters when it’s dropped from a height. And then he is dead, he has been taken away from you, he has been stolen, and you are eclipsed by a blood-red wrath that is animalistic and unforgiving. After each take when you are ripped back through the veil and into reality, you can’t remember exactly what you did or said, and the director doesn’t have many critiques so you aren’t sure how it’s going.

But when it’s over, while you are still standing on the soundstage with the other actors, Aegon puts on his sunglasses and smiles at you from across the room; and you remember what he said outside his office on the day you first met—you are so bright, sunshine—and you know you’ve done a good job.

[lavendertownfreak]

Yo! Found my old Trainer card from when I attempted the Johto league! Most of these lads live with friends/family now… except Una of course! Shortly after the Indigo League busted my ass is when I went here to Lavender Town and caught Penny as a Spinarak. Memories… Introductions:

Snek is my Feraligatr. Big cuddle bug. Very friendly. Kinda unfortunate that his kin show affection by biting.

Nature: Adamant

Ability: Strong Jaw

Moves: Crunch/Ice Fang/Waterfall/Dragon Dance

Wings is just kinda a guy. I mean this in the most affectionate way possible, but Wings doesn’t have much personality. He USED to be super shy, but when he evolved into Pidgeot, he just kinda became… stoic I guess. Good fighter tho.

Nature: Serious

Ability: Keen Eye

Moves: Air Slash/Twister/Hyper Voice/Roost

Una is my baby girl. I love her. This is the journey where I caught her! She’s very friendly, likes hugs, but is actually quite calm and nice.

Nature: Calm

Ability: Rain Dish

Moves: Surf/Sludge Bomb/Ice Beam/Barrier

Soka is a good lad. Very strong battler, and actually still kinda lives with me (he chills out in the area behind the gym, tends to the garden we have in honor of Mr. Fuji). Strong will, and is more than willing to suplex Groudon if the need arises.

Nature: Jolly

Ability: Guts

Moves: Brick Break/Strength/Megahorn/Aerial Ace

Redwood is a little goofball. Think of him as the class clown of the party. Still very nice tho. He has something of a green thumb (for reference, he joins Soka in tending the Garden). We joke that he genuinely thinks he’s a grass type lol.

Nature: Jolly

Ability: Rock Head

Moves: Head Smash/Wood Hammer/Earthquake/Focus Punch

Silver is a strange one. I found her in the fuckin Goldenrod Radio Tower of all places. She’s a little asshole, and I say that 100% affectionately. She’s my little lightning wizard lol. Had Silver living with me and Vi for a bit, but now she just kinda… is around. If you ever see a Misdreavus with a hair bow here in Lavender Town (specifically by the cemetery and/or gym), that’s probably Silver. If she tries to smite you with the wrath of Thunderus, then that is DEFINITELY Silver.

Nature: Sassy

Ability: Levitate

Moves: Shadow Ball/Psybeam/Thunder/Dazzling Gleam

If I find any more old trainer cards of mine, I’ll post em here! Oh, also here’s Penny’s set if you wanna know:

Nature: Careful

Ability: Merciless

Moves: Poison Fang/Leech Life/Night Shade/Sticky Web

[celestialholz]

So, The Harvest...

Oh, you thought I wasn't coming back for you after spending five hours on Surrendering Sunflora, did ya? Thought you were slipping under my radar? Guess again, my spicy little friend...

The Harvest is of course Brassius' other named Artazon sculpture, and it tells its own compelling narrative, because... well, of course it does, have I taught you all nothing? Imagine this guy does something straight for 0.3 of a second.

Fellow gay theorist mini Holz will be demonstrating these for you today:

For simplicity's sake, we'll call these A, B and C respectively. Now, I've commented before that C is the perfect example of The Harvest being part-Brass, part-Hass and part-Arboliva, because of its colours, spikiness and form, but what's a story with only its ending?

And so, if one must be relevant to types, so must the others.

This is, as were the Sunfloras, allegorical. I've had to take the meanings from these, as representations of their types. But I've said it before and I'll say it again - this is what artists do, and this is also what people who makes game do. They ask you to consider their minds at the time of creation, and that's kinda of my whole deal, ripping that shit open like it's a goddamn Christmas present.

We start, therefore, with A. A's colours represent the Fire and Electric types - a passion, a spark, a zest and a joy in living. In colour theory, yellow is happiness, and red is fire - a blaze of emotion. And yet, it's circled by pale blue 'olives' - in Pokemon terms, the Ice type, and a type our dear Brassie is weak to. This is his beginning - creativity, smothered by the cold of depression. We know he was saved by Hass, which leads us to...

... B. B is saturated now in Ice - the cold has crept in, the depression and illness is defining him more than the joy in art. Except... now it's joined by pink. And this pink is damn close to the Psychic type, a type filled with knowledge, mental strength, and sunshine allegories - Solgaleo and Solrock, anyone? Or, you know, a man who looks far too much like a Sunflora...

B, therefore, is Brass finding Hass, at his lowest ebb. Hass is getting under his skin, showering him in praise, showing him that he's worth all the self-belief and self-confidence in the world, healing him... which is where the Dragon-type indigo comes in. This time, Hassel orbits him; he circles the outside, understanding, encouraging, boosting that mental strength by showing Brass how worthy and brilliant he is. Which leads to only one conclusion...

... C. C is harmony. C is the man we find before us in the game, the end product of all that boosting, all of Hassel's kindness - the confident, established artist, the man who has allowed colour and vibrance back into his life, orbited now once again by Electric olives - the spark's back. They almost look like miniature suns. Imagine that...

Grass and Dragon, in perfect complement.

Where this gets even more fascinating is that whilst you can find several versions of each colour variant in Artazon, the first place you encounter them is in the central plaza - and whilst A and B host a confused couple, each wondering where their love is...

... C stands separate, unconcerned.

Because C? C is anything but alone. It doesn't need one to wonder where the other is - they're right here, and they always will be.

Just to put the cherry on the cake of this adorable saga, though, we must head a town over. Game Freak so deep in their lore mini Holz has to cross Paldea to piece it together. Fucking spectacular, you funky little company.

Welcome to the central plaza of Levincia instead, where we find this homosexual lassooing his own C on a digital ad board with his own whip. And what's he lassooing it away from? The purple - or, in this case, the Poison type.

... You know, that one type that infects, that creates toxicity. One of those other types Grass is weak to. Nothing toxic will destroy this harmony, not on this man's watch; he will never regress back to the darkness and the depression whilst he has that Dragon beside him, whilst that spark remains.