#HAH. gotcha

[rodismancave]

Megs’ asleep time to post about how I feel about him

[absurdumsid]

Okay I gotta request my rare pairing error x swan aka swapdream nightmare if you still taking requests of course

he cares a lot abt his health

Error! Sans belongs to CrayonQueen/LoverofPiggies

Swapdream! Nightmare belongs to Song_A

[elliespuns]

Jackson Ellie is the type of girl you'd expect ignoring you if you had a crush on her but the fact is that she probably had a crush on you long before you did and instead of straight telling you she just keeps drawing these little sketches of you, pinning them on the board above her bed. (but you're not Dina, so dream on)

[mossy-crow0]

get piper mcleaned

[landfilloftrash]

juuuuust adding a couple of nickels to my gargantuan pile. doooon’t even worry about it.

[daisyachain]

There are works which are not [genre] but works made that have read a lot of [genre]. YJ is not an anime but it is a cartoon that has watched a lot of anime. MTMTE is not a comedy but it is a space opera that has watched a lot of sitcoms. I’d like to learn the term for a work that is deep in conversation with a genre without belonging to that genre even as a hybrid. Specifically works that address, lampshade, satirize, employ genre signposts without obeying genre conventions.

[localratwithcowboyhat]

m30w:3

Evil M30w m30w ! >:3

[brainjvice]

No because . I hate when people push the sibling trope onto characters who definitely do NOT have that relationship nor are actually siblings. I actually hate it more than the parent version of this. Like i can call someone's mentor a 'parent' for shits and giggles. But sibling???? No.

[thedoodlemuffin]

My first attack on Art Fight this year

River belongs to @mth3gr34t

[fefeps]

sometimes i wonder if i've done my best in making the "sexy villain" sexy, and then i go and show my roster to ppl and the first thing they do is lust after Huvixi so... yeah, i've succeeded

[tiredf-o-u-r]

Welp upon further reflection I guess cause my triggers are pretty surface level first base level intimacy then people will find out about all that pretty quickly so shoutout to not wasting time I guess

[purekittydownthere]

OP these tags are so real

if you think brock cares more about the boys than he does doc you're not only wrong you need to go back and rewatch the show.

[slut4megantheestallion]

Arcane characters - what it's like to share a bed with them (Fluffy Headcannons)

Pairings - Vi, Mel, Jinx, Caitlyn, Sevika, Jayce, Viktor, ekko, silco.

Summary: what it's like to share a bed with them.

Genre:Fluff

-Vi

●Vi is a cuddler through and through. The second you're in bed, she's throwing an arm over you and pulling you close like you might disappear overnight.

●She sleeps deeply but has a habit of shifting around a lot, especially on rough nights when old memories resurface. She might tighten her grip on you in her sleep, mumbling something incoherent before settling down.

●Her body is warm, and she always runs a little hot, which is a blessing in colder months, but it might make you overheat in the summer. She doesn't mind if you push her away to cool off, but she will absolutely drag you back the second you stop sweating.

●"Babe, where do you think you're going? You're my teddy bear, 'member?" She mumbles, half-asleep, pulling you back against her chest.

●if you have trouble sleeping, she'll absentimindedly rub circles into your back, sometimes humming and old Zaunite tune she remembers from her childhood.

●Waking up next to her usually means lazy morning kisses and a smug grin as she stretches. "Sleep, okay? Sweetheart? 'Cause you snored like a bear." (She's lying, but she thinks it's funny.)

-Mel

●Sharing a bed with Mel is like sleeping next to a goddess draped in silk - she always smells faintly of jasmine and wears the softest, most elegant nightgowns. She's still a sleeper and barely moves throughout the night. The only time she shifts is if you're having trouble, in which case she'll reach out and run her hands through your arm soothingly.

●"Shh, love. Close your eyes. I'm right here," she whispers, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

●Her bed is insanely luxurious, with the softest sheets and plush pillows. It feels like sleeping in a cloud, and she enjoys indulging in late-night talks while wrapped up in warmth.

●Mornings with Mel are slow and peaceful. She wakes up early, but she stays in bed longer if you're still asleep, watching you with a soft smile as she traces gentle patterns on your arm.

●If you wake up before her and try to leave, her arm will tighten around your waist. "Leaving already?" She murmurs, voice husky with sleep. "Stay a little longer..."

-Jinx

●Sleeping next to Jinx is chaotic but fun - she moves around a lot, talks in her sleep, and sometimes ends up sideways on the bed.

●"Hah! Gotcha!" She giggles in her sleep, suddenly flinging an arm over you like she just won a wrestling match.

●She doesn't necessarily need to cuddle, but she does like having you close. If you're not touching in some way, she'll grab your arm, your shirt- anything- just to feel you near.

●Some nights, when she's feeling restless, she'll start whispering nonsense or poke your cheek until you grumble at her. "Heeeey, ya awake? No? What if I.... boop!- Okay, okay, I'll stop!"

●She actually sleeps better when you play with her hair, and if you start stroking it, she'll instantly melt and snuggle into your side.

●Mornings? Absolute gremlin mode.

●"Ughhh, five more minutes, cupcake. No, ten. No,actually - just gimme the whole day."

-Caitlyn Kirraman

●Caitlyn sleeps with perfect posture - no tossing, no turning, just peaceful, controlled breathing, until you're in the bed.

●The moment you're there, she softens completely and instinctively pulls you close, resting her chin on top of your head.

●"Comfortable?" She murmurs sleepily, pressing a light kiss to your hair.

●She's the type to wake up early, but if she doesn't have immediate duties, she'll stay in bed a little longer, stroking your arm absentimindedly while enjoying the warmth.

●Love pillow talk at night. If you're both lying awake, she'll ask about your day, your thoughts, your dreams - anything to pull you into comfort.

●Her bed always smells fresh and immaculately clean, with crisp linens and just the right amount of fluff.

-Sevika

●Sharing a bed with sevika is like sleeping next to a human furnace - she radiates warmth and sleeps like a rock.

●She's not overly clingy, but if she's in a particularly protective mood, she'll hook an arm around your waist and keep you there like a personal pillow.

●"You move too much." She grumbles when you try to shift. "Relax."

●She's got a deep, steady heartbeat, and resting your head against her chest is enough to knock you out instantly.

●Sometimes, in the dead of night, if she wakes up and notices you're still awake, she'll rub your back absentimindedly, muttering, "Go to sleep, doll. I got you."

●Mornings are slow and lazy, and she usually pulls you back down if you try to get up too early. "Stay. too early to deal with people."

-Jayce

●Jayce is a big guy, which means big warm cuddles. You're basically trapped in a muscle cocoon all night.

●He snores lightly, but if you poke him, he'll mumble a half-asleep apology and shift to a quieter position.

●If you're cold, he immediately tucks you into his chest and rubs your arm to warm you up. "Damn, babe, you're freezing, C'mere."

●In the mornings, he grumbles like a bear but will wake up fast if you start playing with his hair. "Mmm... that's nice... wait, what time is it?"

-Viktor

●Viktor sleeps like a cat in a sunbeam- curled up, comfortable, and completely at peace once he finally drifts off.

●He often falls asleep mid-conversation, and you'll hear soft murmurs of unfinished thoughts as he dozes.

●If he wakes up and finds you cold, he'll drape his blanket over you without a second thought, even if it means he's left shivering.

●in the mornings, he's slow to rise, muttering in groggy confusion as he rubs his eyes. "... What time is it? No, too early... five more minutes."

-Ekko

●Ekko is a cuddle bug, no doubt about it. He loves wrapping himself around you, tangling your legs together like it's the most natural thing in the world.

"Mmm, you're comfy," He murmurs sleepily, nuzzling into your shoulder.

●If you have trouble sleeping, he'll start rambling about random stuff - stories from the Firelights, funny memories, or crazy theories - until you eventually doze off. He sometimes mumbles in his sleep, and you'll hear bits of phrases like, "No, don't touch that... ugh, dumbass..."

●Mornings are playful - he wakes up with a sleepy grin and tries to tickle you awake if you're being stubborn about getting up.

-Silco

●Sharing a bed with silco is surprisingly comfortable - he doesn't move much, but his presence is incredibly calming.

●He's a light sleeper and will wake up instantly if you seem distressed, rubbing soothing circles on your back without saying a word.

●He doesn't cuddle outright, but he always makes sure some part of him is touching you - whether it's an arm resting beside yourself or his hand loosely holding your fingers.

●if you try to get up too early, he'll softly murmur, "Stay," without even opening his eyes.

[stuffmyfriendssay]

Amab this, afab that. How about acab huh? How about that?

[darlingdaisyfarm]

Listen I’m going insane from how you write Stan and been rereading your spicy chatting headcanons and…. Am I too greedy if I’ll ask for sex call with him?? 🥲

when the pervy old man meets his match

tags: smut, nsfw, fem reader, phone sex, competitive dirty talk, established relationship, reader is just as much of a menace as Stan

hey honey thank you so much! here it is! it's honestly just full of dialogues lmao. sorry i wrote this in a depraved frenzy and did not look back. if there are mistakes, pretend you don’t see them. if it’s too filthy, no it’s not<3 mb I'll correct it later

your phone rings and it's midnight. a little devilish smile appears on your lips. you know exactly who it is.

“finally,” you purr, picking up. “was wondering how long it’d take for you to crack, old man.”

“tch. crack?” Stan scoffs. “sweetheart, i was givin' you a chance to call first. figured you’d get too desperate to wait.”

you smirk, rolling onto your back. ”oh, is that what you think?”

“i know it.” he laughs. “ain’t had my hands on ya in three whole days. bet you’re losin’ your goddamn mind over it.”

cocky bastard.

“hmm,” you hum in amusement. “who said i haven’t had my hands on myself instead?”

“heh, sure, doll, then you just laid there all frustrated, wishin’ it was me instead of your hand.”

“oh, no, Stan,” you interrupt innocently. “i came.” he stops breathing. “mm, and it felt so good, too, made such a mess. you would’ve loved it.”

Stanley goes silent. oh, you’ve got him now. “. . . the fuck’d you just say?”

you stretch out on the bed, imagining the look on his face. jaw tight. eyes dark. grip white-knuckling his phone.

“you heard me,” you coo. “been keeping myself nice and satisfied while you’re gone.”

a lie. a blatant, filthy lie. of course you want him. but you won’t say that. not yet.

“what’s the matter?” you murmur, teasing. “dont tell me. . . you jealous of my fingers?”

Stan lets out a harsh breath. “yeah, actually,” he growls. “bet they don’t even get the job done right and you still finish all needy and desperate, just wishin’ it was my cock instead.”

fuck. your breath hitches slightly, so tiny, but Stan hears it.

“. . . ohhh, that gotcha, huh?” his voice dips, turning low. “ya can play all confident, sweetheart, act like ya ain’t fuckin’ sufferin’ without me, like ya ain’t practically drippin’ just hearin’ my voice—“

you swallow. hard. your smile fades from your confident face

“but we both know the truth, don’t we?”

no, you don't give up. “you sound real worked up, Stanley. do you need me to take care of it for you?”

a sharp inhale from the other end. “heh,” he grits out. “you wish.”

“yeah, sounds like you’re getting all hot and bothered over there. you’re already touching yourself, huh? couldn’t help it?”

“hah,” Stan scoffs, but his voice sounds weaker now. oh, you’re winning.

“c’mon, baby,” you whisper in a honey-sweet voice. “tell me. are you hard?”

he exhales through his teeth. “maybe.”

“aw, poor Stanley, been away from me too long, huh? you must be so worked up, all desperate and aching. . .”

Stan grins. “sweetheart, i’m a grown-ass man. i ain’t desperate for anything.”

you pause long enough to make his skin prickle. then softly and slowly you say quietly “so you’re not hard right now?”

fuck. his body betrays him instantly. because, obviously he is. painfully so. has been since the second he heard your voice, if he’s being honest. but like hell is he gonna admit that to you.

“nah,” he lies too quickly.

you giggle. “liar.”

“shut up,” he mutters.

“sorry, Stanley, i cant shut up, thinking about how i’d drop to my knees for you, pull your pants down real slow, press my tongue right up against that thick cock and—”

“oh, for fuck’s sake—“

“you’d be so sensitive, all needy and throbbing for me. i could get you begging in five minutes.”

“like hell you could!”

your laugh is pure evil. “oh, really?” Stan knows that tone, he’s in trouble. “wanna prove it, old man?”

Stan grits his teeth. “you little minx,” he growls. “fine. you wanna play? we play. wanna know what i think?” your stomach tightens, you're so not ready to hear that. but it's so damn sexy when he gets like that. “i know you’re sittin’ there all wet and needy, waitin’ for me to take over.”

your breath catches as your fingers start moving faster.

“aww, see? can hear it in your breath, baby. you love lettin’ me take control, huh? love bein’ my little plaything?”

you grip the sheets.

“y’think about my cock, huh?” that bastard teases. ”you ache for it and dream about me splittin’ you open, fuckin’ you deep ‘til you cry.”

your thighs press together as you try to bring yourself to orgasm while he talks.

“tell me, baby, what’s your favorite way for me to fuck ya?”

you stop for a second, breathing. “. . .i dunno, you tell me.”

Stan groans and laughs. “that’s what i thought. you like it every way i give it to ya. you like gettin’ thrown around, pinned down, bent over. like when i take my time, when i tease, when i make you beg for it. like when i spread your legs and fuck ya slow, so deep your little cunt flutters around me, just tryin’ to suck me in.”

you let out a quiet sob, rubbing your clit harder. shit. okay. he came prepared.

“remember the last time i had ya?” fuck. he's dirty for this. “spread ya out on the kitchen table, pushed those pretty little legs open, had ya beggin' for my cock while i just tapped it against that messy little cunt.”

heat spikes through your belly. your brain melting

“and you were so fuckin’ wet, so messy for me. couldn't even hold still. had to pin ya down, keep ya in place, make ya take it nice and deep. and god, the way ya screamed when i finally gave it to ya,” he groans, pumping his twitching cock. “cried so pretty for me, took every single inch like a good fuckin’ girl.”

you exhale.

“aw, babyy,” Stan mocks. “gettin’ all squirmy over there? miss me poundin’ that tight little cunt open? miss feelin’ my cock knockin’ up against your cervix?”

oh, this bastard. he knows exactly what he’s doing. knows how to talk you into a goddamn frenzy, how to drag you through every memory, making you feel it all over again. but you won’t let him win.

“eh, big talk for a man who passed out immediately after a blowjob.”

Stan huffs.

“it's just,” you muse. “i think i might need to find someone who can actually keep up with me.”

“sweetheart,” he growls. “don't fuckin' start with me.”

you grin. “what, old man? afraid someone else could fuck me better?”

“honestly, you're such a fucking brat.” he mutters resentfully.

“and you're all alone, jerking off to the thought of me like some pathetic old pervert.”

Stan groans and that sound makes you clench around nothing.

“hehe, you stroking it, old man? pumping that fat cock real slow, thinkin’ about how tight my pussy is?”

his eyes widen. wow. . . you're too brave today. he likes that. “sweet moses,” you hear him groaning.

“tell me, baby, am i right? it's throbbing? just begging to be buried inside me?”

“fuckin’ hell,” Stan hisses. “fuck, f-fuck, shit. . .”

wide cocky smile appears on your face. oh you love this. love how you can hear the tension in his breath, imagining how he’s gripping himself too tight, trying to hold on, trying not to lose.

but he’s gonna. he’s so gonna.

“y’know what i was thinking about earlier?” you murmur.

Stan swallows. “wh-what?”

you grin. “how deep you get when you fuck me.” Stan's response is low whimper when he circles his leaking tip with his fingers. “no, seriously, you stretch me so wide, Stanley. get all the way up against my cervix, push me down into the mattress, just ruining me. i love hearing your groans when i bite your shoulder.”

his breathing is much heavier now, he's already so close.

“Stanley? you close?“

“y-you’re gonna fuckin’ regret this,” he grits out.

“what’s wrong, old man? you were all big and bad a second ago. now ya can’t even keep up? i know how bad you want it, how much you miss the way i take you so deep, so tight”

Stanley is so fucking close.

“you’re leaking, huh? and you’re still trying to hold back,�� another mocking sympathy from you. “so stubborn, determined not to let me win. guess i’ll just have to break you, then. oh yeah,” you laugh when you hear another moan from him. “that gotcha, huh? i know you’d love that, you’d love me getting on top, riding you all slow and deep, keeping you right on the edge ‘till you’re begging me for it, begging me to let you cum inside of me.”

“f-fuck, baby, just. . . just like that,” his voice is shaking.

“you gonna cum, Stan? gonna make a mess all over yourself just from hearing my voice?”

“you—fuck—you little—”

suddenly his phone vibrates with a notification. you just sent him a photo.

he barely has time to open it before he sees you, spread out as you fuck yourself open on your fingers.

Stan sucks in a sharp breath. “what. . . the fuck”

“somethin’ wrong?” you coo.

silence, hes silent until you hear choked loud “oh oh oh, fuckkk” and you know he lost, so fucking hard. his orgasm hits hard, violent, brain-melting, his body tensing, groaning your name through gritted teeth. you hear the sharp inhale, the shaky breath, the low, drawn-out moan as he spills messy over his fist.

“awww, couldn’t hold out, huh?”

Stan pants, breathless. “fuck you.”

“you wish,” you smirk, giggling.

“okay okay. you won.” Stanley admits, rubbing his sweaty forehead. “you won, baby.”

“but you put up a good fight, old man!”

he groans. “hot belgian waffles, what the hell am i gonna do with you?”

“maybe bend me over the second you get home and teach me a lesson?”

Stan chuckles. “oh, sweetheart, you have no idea what you just signed up for.”

[slamminslamminmcgill]

mm finally watched deadpool and wolverine today, and my god... 🥵 so many thoughts...

Idek which ones to put here. What do you think a p*ss kink would look like with both of them? Or just more of them making reader squirt their brains out.

The dialogue you write between them sounds so natural. Like I can literally read it in their voice. -🐮

LFGGGG thank y’all for giving me an excuse to talk abt this 🙏 i got more ideas but this post would’ve been WAYYYY too long sooo be on the lookout for more debauchery

warning: piss, anal, dp, dubcon, light degradation/humiliation, intox (alcohol for logan)

anatomical terms: cunt/pussy

as with most of the fucked up kinks y'all try in this polycule, it happens spontaneously the first time.

logan had just finished inside your ass, and out of the three of you, it takes him the longest to cum. it also takes a lot out of him. he roars and jams his claws through wade's temples (whoopsie! that's why your bed has red vinyl sheets hehe) so there's a dramatic break in the action afterwards.

"ah... hah... ngh, fuck..." he's panting, heaving almost, and slides out of your now gaping hole, "fuck, that was good..." he retracts his claws from wade’s skull, then purrs in your ear and smooches your neck, "good job, kid."

wade, still hard as steel in your cunt, claps excitedly for him. "yay! good job, YOU, peanut! UGH, i love watching you fill him up. you get so... beastly~."

you giggle, nuzzling into wade's tits, feeling goofy and content. a warm load up one hole, and a thick cock up the other.

logan smiles, kissing you on the back of your head this time. “you gonna be okay alone with him for a sec? i gotta go piss.”

"mhm!"

"'kay. i'll be right back, pumpkin." another kiss to your neck, and he's off, walking flaccidly to the bathroom, shaking his fuzzy cheeks.

you drop your head back down against wade’s chest and sigh, "i gotta piss too, actually."

"oh, yeah, yes you do, mister!" deadpool pats you on your shoulders, "always make sure to pee before, during, and after sex!"

you absentmindedly chuckle, until you realize what it is he just said, “wait… during?!"

"hey! thou shalt not knock what thou hast not tried!i know it sounds icky, but hear me out."

he thrusts upwards into you sharply

“fuck!!!”

“so! i want you to imagine…” *THRUST* “how good it’d feel…” *THRUST* “to be really filled up.” *THRUST* “and i mean FULL!” *THRUST* “like your pussy is a searing hot water balloon about to explode. and then when it does?” *THRUST* “when it all comes flooding out of you? oh darling, the relief…” he moans dramatically, gripping your hips and shifting you back and forth on his shaft, “hottest thing you’ll ever experience, i swear. there’s nothing else like it… wanna try it?”

you’re skeptical, but wade wilson is a hell of a salesman. “…fuck it. let’s do it.”

“yippee!!! okay, just gotta get soft so i can piss. dead kittens… calculus homework… grandma deadpool! there we go! okay… phew… here goes…”

it’s a tense, awkward silence as he starts. you’re not sure what to expect. then, you begin to feel it. that searing heat swelling inside you, pooling between his cock and your skin, flooding what little space there was inside you. you gasp, and attempt to squirm to cope with the sensation, but wade holds you still.

“don’t move! don’t move, my little urinal boy! mmm, i gotcha, just… just trust me on this… i’m almost done…”

“you two are fucking disgusting.”

logan’s voice coming out of nowhere makes you jump, and then wade’s piss spills out of you. and just like he told you, it feels fucking incredible. you’re twitching, spasming, moaning pure nonsense as wade fucks your drenched, desecrated cunt. loud splashing accompanies the brutal pace of his hips.

“your loss, peanut! imagine wasting your piss on the bathroom toilet when you could’ve given it to this even cuter toilet!” he pecks you on the cheek with a loud “mwah~!”

from then on, it becomes you and wade peeing on each other just to mess with him. since he’s never told y’all to stop, you both figure that he likes it, but he’s too embarrassed to admit it.

the three of y’all are showering together

“so, just asking as a throuple here, are we all pro- or anti-peeing in the shower?”

“if you get piss on me, i’ll stick my claws through your fucking corneas.”

“promise?!”

”don’t. you fucking. dare.”

“aw, boo, you’re no fun.” wade pouts, then grabs you by your wet hair and pulls your ear towards his lips. “you, though… you’re TONS of fun.” he playfully bites your ear, and then your neck. “so fun, in fact, that you’re gonna get on your knees and drink every drop of piss that i give you, right?”

i feel like the only time y’all can get logan to participate is while he’s drunk. he’s too sloshed to feel shame for it.

maybe y’all are in bed together, all cuddled up in a tangled mess of limbs, and he grumbles something about needing to take a leak.

“oh, don’t worry about getting up, honey-bun!” wade fishes under the blankets for logan’s soft cock, “lemme take care of that for you.”

“wh… the fuck are you talkin’ about?”

“ugh please, don’t act like you haven’t thought about pissing down my throat. can’t i just once do something nice for you?”

he grumbles, not wanting to indulge wade, but not wanting to get up even more.“fine. whatever. i hope you choke on it.”

“oh, i will.”