#HAAAAAAA DID I SLEEP? NO

[phyyne]

as Rite Here Rite Now is in theatres and I could FINALLY SEE THE GHOULETTES i'm sharing this fanart again !!!

what did y'all thought about the movie???? i loved it so much HAAAAAAA !!! i want to draw Ghouls again so bad, finally drawing clear designs for my headcanons for all of them and the original design/oc i have in mind too........ (i'll have to do that on top of the preparation for the art fight and finishing Ace Attorney and working -anyway I won't sleep much this week lmao)

Here it is !! the finished illustration of the new Ghoulettes !! they've been on my mind for two weeks now, im happy i was able to do something that i like with them !!!

i think i'll post ref sheets of their designs in the next few days, as well as some other sketches i did !

quick explanation for their names : i really liked Eden and followed that idea, and because i feel like cellos are water/bass instrument i looked up what seas where important in the Bible and how they were called at different time periods and found that the dead sea was called Nekra in ancient greek, and the red sea Erythra. Lume was already popular, and i actually enjoy it so i just kept it like for Eden !

Voilà ! hope you'll like this fanart hehe

and it's in time for the Fanart Friday of @thebandghostofficial ! perfect !

[scandalousfemale]

Fall to Pieces

Rafe Cameron x Y/N

An unexpected and unnecessary part 2 to Lists, though it can be read as a stand-alone.

Y/N helps Rafe get sober after he told her what he had done. She’s conflicted because now she’s getting glimpses of a better Rafe but she can’t forget or forgive him so he makes it right the only way that he knows how.

WC: 5,308

Warning: smut, mentions of shooting the sheriff (but he did not shoot the deputy), mentions of jail, mentions of drugs and withdrawals, mentions of funerals (they think Sarah and John B are dead), spoilers, unprotected sex, mention of birth control, mentions of anger, mentions of parental unit dying/going to jail, mentions of PTSD, mentions of nightmares, y/n pulls a knife out on Barry and regrets it immediately, mentions of drugs 

A/N: Hello! Thank you for taking the time to even look at this fic, I worked really long and hard on it and I had a great time writing it. It was my first time ever writing smut so if it sucks, I’m so sorry. I’m also running on no sleep because I’ve been editing this all night. That being said, I tried my best to proofread, I’m sure that there are tons of mistakes anyway. Again, thank you for reading my fic! I ended it the only way that felt right to me. Oh, and it’s inspired by Fall to Pieces by Avril Lavigne

It’s been 7 months since Rafe showed up at your door and ripped your heart out of your now gaping chest. 6 months and three weeks since his family held a funeral for his sister in which he couldn’t attend because he was going through withdrawals. 6 months since his friends and family started asking you about his whereabouts. You’ve lied to everyone you knew back on the Outer Banks, telling them that you haven’t seen him since that summer.

You’ve convinced yourself that you were okay with taking care of him even if you weren’t together but for the first three weeks while he was at his worse, every time you had to touch him, you wanted to throw up (most times you did). You just can’t help but picture him killing Peterkin, sometimes you have dreams where you see it happen and you didn’t do anything to stop it, then you’d wake up next to him and have to move to the sofa just from the disgust. Though you’re not exactly sure what really happened that day, and he wouldn’t tell you, your overactive imagination filled in the blanks for you every night for those first few weeks.

The fifth week was better, in the sense that your disgust was slowly being taken over by hate. You hated that he had put you in this situation. You hated that you allowed yourself to care enough to take care of him. You hated that you love him but most of all, you hate his father for screwing up his children so much that one would rather die than go back to him and the other couldn’t stay sober long enough to know right from wrong.

You were also able to convince your parents to help you co-sign and move into a house near the school instead of staying in the dorms. You said that it’s because of all the teens partying around you and that you couldn’t concentrate on studying but really, it’s because of the noise complaints that you’ve been getting. It’s been hell studying for finals while sleeping next to someone going through cold shakes or nightmares. You’ve told yourself multiple times that Rafe was going through withdraws while also suffering from PTSD but it didn’t make you feel any better when you started missing classes or came home to your living room completely destroyed because he had a rage fit due to the cravings. You’ve offered to send him to rehab but he wanted no trace of where he could be so you complied.

A month after getting everything straightened out, you were finally moving out. You were happy that you could go further into the city where Rafe could go out more, spend more time around other people than surround himself with his mistakes, and four walls. Though the process wore on him, you could tell that he was becoming a better person. He was more patient and understanding. It would be a lie to say that his fuse wasn’t still just as bad when someone would trigger it but it seems you’ve been doing a lot of that anyway—lying.

  Seven months into living together and him finally being sober, you want to say that he reminds you of the old Rafe but he doesn’t. He’s much more mature, his sad eyes tell a story that he’s seen way too much, too soon. Some days, you wish that you could take his pain away. Other days, you wish that he’d drown in it…at least you wish you thought that.

Renting a U-Haul, and maybe to fill your own fantasy of moving in together like a normal couple in college, you had Rafe help you pack. Was it a good idea? Probably not. Most of the time you ended up yelling at him for packing the bedroom things with the living room items. When you saw him put the dishes in with the DVDs, you had banished him to the house for the rest of the day, telling him that you’d pack the kitchen away by yourself. You were happy that you’d actually done that though because it gave you the excuse to give the two of you some space. You had found yourself getting close to him again. Leaning in when you laughed, touching his arm to show him something on your phone or when you window shop. You didn’t want to give him mixed signals but how could you not when you’re confused yourself?

So, you left Rafe unpacking all the boxes of clothes and moving around the furniture while you came back and tackled the kitchen. You almost wished that you had asked him to come along just for his company but after waking up in his arms last night, groggy from being tired, you figured that it was best to put some distance between the two of you.

A soft knocking sounded from your door and the smile that appeared on your face should’ve been criminal. You were almost too happy to see him. You couldn’t—wouldn’t let yourself forget what he did, though it was hard to remember when you’ve never seen Rafe in that state. Pushing your thoughts aside for the millionth time, you yanked the door open, your smile immediately dropping. You tried to shut the door as quickly as you opened it but a hand lands in the middle of the door and pushes it open the rest of the way.

“Now, that’s no way to greet an old friend,” Barry said, as condescending as ever.

“You’ve lost that title the minute you started selling drugs,” you narrowed your eyes at him.

He was right. Barry and you go way back, back before you were considered a “kook”, before you even knew what it meant to be a part of figure 8. Well, technically your moms go way back. You two were destined to be friends since you’ve come out of the womb. You shared secrets, scars, heartbreaks, skinned knees, all the same. You held him when his mom died and invited him over to your place every single day, unknowingly introducing him to his future clients. Your mom loved him like a child and if you ate, he ate. Until, of course, you started dating Rafe at fifteen and Barry started finding new friends. About a year later, the friendship was over. One night you walked in on him selling drugs to Rafe. You told them both that you wanted nothing to do with either of them if Barry kept selling and Rafe kept distributing but neither of them listened. Barry continued selling but stopped coming around, breaking your mother’s heart. As for Rafe, well, we know that story.

“Yes, of course. Big, bad, naughty, Barry,” he rolled his eyes and though his words had a hint of humor, his eyes did not. He shoved past you and made his way inside your apartment.

“What do you want?” You said in a clipped tone, eyeing his figure to see if he has any visible weapons on him or not because last time he showed up at your apartment, he was not so kind.

“Rafe,” Barry said matter of factly with a bright smile. As if he wasn’t talking about someone who supposedly dropped off the face of the earth seven months ago.

You stared at him and shrugged, “your guess is as good as mine.”

“Y/n, I’m not going to ask you twice and I don’t exactly do well to being lied to, where is Rafe?” He leaned against the refrigerator with his arms crossed in front of his chest, eyeing you.

“I haven’t seen him,” you lied through gritted teeth. You backed yourself into your kitchen, feeling comfort that there was an exit behind you while Barry was in your line of sight.

“Baby, if you only knew what he’s done, you wouldn’t be protecting him right now,” Barry chuckled as he took a step towards you, “he owes me a debt and I’ve given him long enough. Now, I’m here to collect. Listen, it’s either me or the SBI, it’s your choi-,” he didn’t have the time to finish before you found your hand wrapped around your kitchen knife bringing the blade down on the sink beside you.

You tried to speak between breaths, “Stop it! Stop!”

Barry’s irritating smile has finally dropped from his face. His hands out in front of him as if he was prepared for you to lose it and charge at him...and maybe you might. At this point, you’re not really sure what you planned to do. You just needed to protect Rafe.

“He’s mine,” you breathe out a declaration you haven’t let left your lips since the night of Rafe’s confession, “you don’t get to take him, the SBI doesn’t get to take him, fucking death doesn’t get to take him from me without my permission. Now, get the fuck out of my apartment right now because I do not know where he is and if I did, I would never tell you,” you said with an eerie calm washing over you. You keep taking steps toward Barry who hasn’t moved back once.

“Come at me, baby, I have nothing to lose,” Barry said with his arms at his side, faking vulnerability while his shifty eyes were telling another story.

“Yes, you do,” you assured him, “We both do, but the difference between us is that I’m willing to lose it all. Are you?”

“You think I’m going to just forget what his little sister did? She stole from me. Now I have leverage over my best seller— my best thief, and you want me to let that slide because a chick with a knife who can’t even keep it steady enough to point at me wants to threaten me? I’ll come back every single day if I have to.”

“His little sister is dead, haven’t you heard? Her and John B got washed away in the storm and you still have the nerve to talk about her? You can come back every day if you want to. I’ll give you the keys to the place. In case you haven’t noticed, I don’t live here anymore.” You gestured toward the empty living room and the boxes beside the two of you.

For the first time, Barry let his guard down long enough to take a look around the apartment.

“I left him,” you continued your half-lie. You did leave Rafe, at your new house, “when I found out what happened, I left him and I couldn’t handle being on campus where I knew he could find me,” where you knew anyone else could find him, “so I’m leaving.” You shrugged, feigning indifference. Setting the knife down on the sink as if that wasn’t the most insane thing that you’ve ever done. You dug into your purse. “Here’s something for your troubles, yeah?” Your mother always told you to have cash on you and finally, it has come in handy, you pulled around about three grand, almost 1/3 of what you got for selling your car.

“Take it,” you shoved the money against his chest. With no hesitation Barry’s clammy hands landed on yours, pressing both your hand and the money against his chest. The contact instantly brought you back from your previous panic. You couldn’t even believe that you had pulled a knife out on him, what were you even going to do with it? It’s not like you were…it’s not like you were Rafe. At the realization, you met Barry’s eyes with so much sadness, “this is the last thing I’m going to do for you, Barry. For your mom, I hope you can get a real job one day,” you said sincerely.

“Always had a thing for the bad boys, huh, y/n?” Barry said, the joking tone in his voice disappearing as he took the money from underneath your palm, letting your hand fall.

“Just the lost ones,” you admitted, “goodbye, Barry.”

He pocketed the cash, giving you one last look before turning around and leaving you to the boxes.

   The house was surprisingly mostly unpacked, except for the two new boxes that you had brought back with you, though in your defense, you didn’t have a lot of things to begin with. After a long-needed shower—more so on Rafe’s part since you left him to do the grunt work all day, you had fixed up dinner for the both of you.

Something had shifted inside of you since the talk with Barry. You could no longer ignore your feelings now that they’re right in your face but you’re still so conflicted. You love Rafe. You love him so much and he’s sober and trying for the first time. You’re seeing him in a new light but today, after picking up that knife, you can’t get over the horrible things that he’s done and it’s tearing you apart inside.

From the archway of the kitchen, you can’t help but look at the boy on your sofa. He’s probably watching some dumb show, his long legs stretched out in front of him while he’s nursing a bottle of water, the sadness in his eyes looking more and more permanent. Your fists clenched up beside you as tears threaten to fall as you made your way in front of him. You can’t count the number of times you’ve seen him like this, the number of times you’ve fantasized about him like this but with your children crawling all over him as you’d laugh and sip a cup of coffee. Now that’s really all it’ll be, a fantasy.

Rafe had set the bottle on the coffee table in front of him as if sensing a confrontation coming on and it fueled your anger even more. You hated that he knew you so well and that you two were so well connected that you could both feel the shift of the energy between the two of you without saying one word. You finally made it in front of him, your knees touching, you couldn’t take your eyes off of his.

He waited, looking back at you as your tears fell from your face and his hands twitched like he wanted to reach out towards you but thought better of it.

“I hate you,” you said pathetically as your shoulders slumped. You angrily wiped away your tears as you shook your head at him. The boy who once was your dream. Rafe didn’t even flinch at your words, he knew it already. He hoped that you’d change your mind about him but he knew from the very first night that things would never be the same.

Without saying a word, Rafe reached for your fists, kissing your knuckles knowing that you’d never use them against him. As if apologizing for even causing you to form them.

“I hate you so much and I can’t forgive you for what you did; I’ve tried,” you said through your tears, “but I also love you so much,” you whispered your confession. His head snapping up at you, searching for your lies and finding none.

Before you could even think, one of his arms snakes around your waist, pulling you down to straddle him as the other came up to your face, forcing you to now look up at him.

“You still love me?” Rafe finally spoke, brushing away a few of your tears with the pad of his thumb.

“I’ve always loved you but you make me hate you,” you said as you leaned your face against his palm, missing the feeling of intimacy with him.

It was almost like something had changed within him, as if he was arguing with himself and finally made up his mind when he leaned in closer to your face, his lips brushing against yours, “Don’t. Tonight just, just love me, okay?”

How could you say no to that? You nodded and it takes him all but a second for his lips to touch yours, knowing that the minute you gave him an inch, he’d take a mile.

The kiss was electric. It was something that you had no idea you were even craving until his were on yours and you couldn’t get enough. Your tongue swiped at his lower lip, taking it in between your teeth and giving him a soft bite, using his gasp as an invitation for your tongue to enter his mouth. Rafe didn’t deny you as his hands worked his way to your hips that’s been subconsciously rocking against his. You worked your hands up his shirt, lingering on his abs, feeling them expand and contract with every breath he takes before removing your lips from his just to pull off his shirt.

Heavenly. It was the only word that came to your mind when you looked at his body. Rafe didn’t give you much time to marvel at the sculpted figure that is his body before pulling your face towards his again, “fuck, y/n,” Rafe breathe and it sent a shiver down your spine. You can already feel the wetness pooling between your legs, knowing full well that the thin layer of your pajama pants is doing nothing but allowing him to feel it, too. Just like how you can feel him grow underneath you, making you whimper when you rock against him the right way. You made your way down his neck, kissing and biting him, marking him like you were teenagers again. Rafe growled at you when you bit a little bit too hard into his shoulder.

“Y/n, baby,” Rafe rasped, trying to get your attention but it was useless, “princess,” he said almost inaudible as you were about to rub out your own orgasm against him. Suddenly, his hand came down hard on your backside, and instead of yelping, you moaned for him to go harder which all but caused him to pull you away from him. Your arms suddenly empty and your chest heaving, you looked at Rafe’s plump lips and eyes that are dark with desire. He stood up and didn’t waste a moment, he allowed you to jump onto him, supporting your weight with his arms around you.

You quickly yanked off your top, allowing your breast to press up against him when you wrap your arms around his neck, “I need you,” you admitted against his neck. More than he knew. In more ways than he could give but for now, you could accept him like this. You felt your back slam against the wall as he fists your hair in his hands, forcing your head back so he could kiss your neck and leave some marks of his own. By the time he reached your bed, you needed your release. He had set you down on the bed, almost too gently. You reached for his pants but his fingers wrapped around your wrist, “I want to taste you first,” he said with what you thought was supposed to be a smile but he was already preoccupying himself with pulling off your shorts. You were almost sure that he moaned just by the sight of your spread legs as if he hadn’t already seen you like this a hundred times.

You laid back and spread your legs further, reaching for his head with his hand but instead he interlocked his fingers with yours saying, “don’t rush me, princess, I want to remember this.” It felt like an eternity before you felt his lips on your inner thigh, causing your body to shudder. Slowly, you felt his tongue delve into you, flicking your clit just right enough for you to buck your hips against him. He wrapped his lips around your clit as his tongue worked it just the way you liked until your nails are leaving marks on him as you scream, “Yes, Rafe, right there, please don’t stop!” Your words along with your moans, giving him the confidence that he still remembers how to make you cum; and you did. Hard. You could’ve sworn that you went cross-eyed for a moment as your thighs attempted to shut around his head. He brought his hands up to hold them back as he continued, bringing on another shaking orgasm.

“I need you in me, Rafe,” you said as this point, almost delirious but you needed the closeness. “I need you to fuck me like you just—like you hate me,” you said but you weren’t sure if you meant it. Granted, in your state, you’d take him any way that he’d come but you just thought back to all the times you’d slept with him in that last month before everything went to shit. When he was at his worst with drugs that most times, he couldn’t get it up, and when he could, it would be rough and fast.

Rafe crawled up your body, using his thumb to wipe his lower lip and then sucking it clean, causing your eyes to flutter. You pushed down his pants until they were around his knees and he kicked them all the way off himself but he didn’t pounce on you and started drilling you. He almost seemed…hesitant.

“I know you hate me but I don’t,” Rafe started, slowly as he began inserting himself into you, inch by inch, “I can’t fuck you like I used to right now. I can’t fuck you like I’m angry, I need to-,” he stopped himself with a moan as you clenched around him, “I just need you to fuck you like you love me okay?” He rasped, looking more vulnerable then you’ve ever seen him. You nodded, grabbing a hold of his hair as you wrapped your legs around him, you kissed him deeply before looking at him in his eyes, “I love you Rafe,” you breathe and that was all it took for him to lose his control.

After basically wrestling around in the sheets, you both came multiple times. Each time with whispers of promises of forever that you both knew was just something said in the heat of the moment. When you both felt spent, though not nearly having enough of each other, Rafe had gotten up to go to the bathroom and get a wet cloth to come and clean you up. You haven’t been this reckless since you two were sixteen and had a pregnancy scare, so you were thanking the heavens for your birth control right now.

Rafe had put the towel away in the bathroom again but didn’t bother to put on his clothes as he laid next to you in bed. You rested your head against his chest as his finger started trailing your spine.

“I saw Barry today,” you said suddenly.

“Yeah?” Rafe tensed, pulling you closer to him as if he could protect you, “What did he want?”

“Other than a trip down memory lane?” you offered, “you.”

Rafe didn’t say a word as he kissed the top of your head and you drifted off to sleep.

  The sun was evil, you were sure of it. The blinding light had awakened you and all you tried to do was burrow deeper into the hard body next to you. Only except, the body wasn’t there. Blindly, you reached out beside you, almost in a panic when you couldn’t feel anything other than the cold sheets, indicating that it has been vacant for some time. You finally opened your eyes and sat up; your body deliciously sore but you couldn’t even enjoy that right now. You walked into the living room, naked as the day you born, only to see a small duffel bag by the door.

“Rafe?” You called out, only to have him appear from the kitchen with an orange juice in his hand. He took a look at you and his eyes lingered on your body, the marks that he left on you. The marks you left on his neck and chest, obvious as well, but you couldn’t concentrate on that, “I can’t believe you,” you spat out as you turned on your heel and made your way back into the bedroom.

You didn’t make it past the door frame before Rafe’s arm snaked around you and pressed your back to his front, his lips coming down to your ear, “stop,” he said, his tone was almost like an order but you knew it was a plea, “whatever it is that’s going on in that head of yours, stop it.”

You turned around in his arms, willing yourself not to cave when his face was inches from yours. Willing yourself not to cry when his bag is inches away from the door, “you’re leaving me,” you stated.

“I’m not leaving you,” Rafe corrected, “last night was just…amazing but it did remind me that being sober isn’t the only thing that I had to get done. I have loose ends, y/n. I have things that I need to make right. So, yes, I am leaving but do not think for a second that I’m leaving because of you. I’m alive because of you.”

“Nice speech,” you said bitterly, crossing your arms across your chest as you stepped out of his grasp, “you’re leaving right after we had sex. It’s still a douchebag move to make.”

“Y/n, I told you. I had a realization. Trust me, if I didn’t-,” he stopped himself, watching you as you pulled his shirt over your head, “if I didn’t have to go, I wouldn’t but I need to like, I don’t know. Clear my head or find myself or whatever the fuck it is. I need to go back to my dad and show my face. Fuck, I need to visit Sarah’s grave.”

“And you can’t do all of that with me? Here I am again, re-arraigning my whole life for you and Rafe Cameron can’t eve-,” he cut you off by lifting you up, making you wrap your legs around his waist. His kiss was hard and bruising.

“Shut the fuck up,” Rafe parroted the line he said seven months ago, only this time, he whispered it with a smile ghosting around his lips.

“I love you,” he said as he caressed your face with one hand, the other still holding you up, “I love you and you do not fully love me like before. I can see it in your eyes, princess. We laugh and we might’ve fucked yesterday but it does not change anything. You don’t trust me so I need to go and make things right, okay? You told me that I needed to love myself before you can be with me again, before you can love me again. So, that’s what I’m going to do. Okay?” he said as he set you down on your feet again.

You nodded, you understood. You weren’t dumb enough to think he’d stay here forever anyway, no matter how much you took care of him and he was right. There are still days where you can’t look at him and having sex last night might’ve made it clear where you both stood with each other but it doesn’t change the fact that sometimes you still hated him-you were just too drunk off sex to act on it.

“Yeah. Okay,” was all you could say. Though you gripped onto his hand like a child as he walked to the front door, picking his bag off the floor and effortlessly resting the strap on his shoulder. He turned to you and reached into his pocket, leaving a small gold chain necklace in the palm on your hand. A lame replacement for his own hand, you thought, but you willed yourself not to grab onto him again.

“Thank you. For literally everything. For changing your whole life for me. For stopping everything. No amount of thank you will ever be enough,” Rafe said sincerely and though it looks like he wants to, he doesn’t kiss you.

“Will I see you again?” You asked, your voice small. You gripped the necklace to your chest.

“I don’t know. But I fucking hope so, y/n,” Rafe said before turning around and walking out of your door.

                                                        Epilogue

“It’s been two years, dad,” you fidget on the bar stool in your parent’s house, you were finally back in the Outer Banks for the first time since Sarah’s funeral. A small simple gold chain hangs from your neck. You don’t remember the last time you took it off.

“A lot of things have changed, y/n. He might not be who he was anymore,” your dad warned, his eyes trained on yours and even though you know he meant that maybe Rafe isn’t like the boy you fell in love with when you were fifteen, all you wished for was that he wasn’t like the boy he was when he was nineteen.

You held up your glass of water, as if you’re making a toast, “then here’s to changes,” you smiled as your dad shook his head.

 When Rafe had left your house, two years ago, he had come back to the Outer Banks like a boy on a mission. You weren’t exactly sure what had happened but rumor has it, he reached out to JJ, Kiara, and Pope to help put his father in prison. From there, they had recruited the help from Mrs. Lana Grubbs, who somehow had enough information to put Ward away for good. Of course, in the midst of getting his father in jail, he had to come clean about his involvement in the murder of Sheriff Peterkin—something that should’ve been a capital offense, but with the help of a very good lawyer (thanks dad) and being involved in the arrest of Ward Cameron, it was brought down to voluntary manslaughter. Rumor also had it that Ward Cameron could’ve gotten away, he could have stuck to his original story, seems like the police bought it anyway but once he heard that Rafe was basically selling himself out for this, he complied, knowing that his son would get less time. By all means, Ward was not a good father and even a worse excuse of a man but you’d like to believe that that was his way of telling Rafe that he loved him enough to do this, especially since he’s lost Sarah.

You sat outside of the prison, in your car. You saw the barb wires and the guards and almost got cold feet. You wrapped your hands tightly around the steering wheel until your knuckles turned white and took a deep breath. You didn’t know why you were so nervous but you felt like if you exit your car, you’d turn into a puddle of goo. After a couple of breathing exercises, you’ve gathered enough courage to walk up to the gate, giving the officer your ID, hoping that you’re still on Rafe’s visitations list. After a couple of minutes, just enough to make you sweat, they led you back to a room. Metal chairs had lined up against the glass, a phone at the side of each divider.

Reminding yourself to breathe, you sat down on the cold steel. You picked up the phone, eager to hear Rafe’s voice. As the rows of inmates started filling up each seat, sitting in front of their loved ones, your eyes searched for him. All the orange jumpsuits looking the same but then you felt it. That connection, that energy that you once shared with this man who was once the love of your life and now almost a stranger. He sat down across from you as you looked up at him, a grin painted on his face, and for the first time in a while, his smile reaches his eyes, “hey princess.”

tags: @millyelliot @snkkat

[spicy-pozole]

OH MYYYY GOOOOOSH

HEY DON’T FORGET TO CALL JUMIN ON DAY 8 AFTER ‘DATING IN COMMON SENSE’ BECAUSE

[dontasktheradiodemon]

Chat log - 8/6/2021

From the day that Alastor came back from being totally silent for three weeks. @hiss-and-vinegar messaged him to welcome him back.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 AH! THERE, IT'S GOOD TO SEE YOUR POSTS AGAIN.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Did YOU notice I wasn't posting?! I didn't! Good golly, how many people noticed?!

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I DIDN'T THINK MUCH OF IT, I SAW YOU IN PERSON FROM TIME TO TIME, I ASSUMED YOU MUST BE

🐍 :3

🐍 BUSY ~

🐍 NYA HA HA HAAAAAAA

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 You know,

🎶 That's

🎶 That's exactly what happened.

🎶 I'm utterly ashamed.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍

🐍 ALASTOR,

🐍 I LITERALLY DON'T SPEND AS MUCH TIME ON HERE EITHER BECAUSE I SPEND IT WITH MY WIFE

🐍 WHY ARE YOU ASHAMED!!!!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Because! You CHOSE to leave everything behind to be with your wife! That's what you wanted to do! On purpose! But it's not what I wanted to do and it isn't on purpose!

🎶 I'm the Radio Demon! If I'm not broadcasting then who am I?!

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 NECK DEEP IN COILS, PRESUMABLY!!!

🐍 OH THAT SAYS WHO... IT STILL STANDS

🐍 ARE YOU SAYING YOU DIDN'T CHOOSE TO BE WITH YOUR MAN??

🐍 THAT HE KIDNAPPED YOU??

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 H̴̛͖̥̰̠̱̞̾̇̈̇̐̚̚͠͝͝ṡ̸̨̻̥̦͈̦̂h̵̰͓̗̀̋̇͛͛͗̊͋̽͝hhs̴̲͇̫͍̩̐͛̎fff̸̹̟̪̳̜͕̣̬̻̭̣̥͕͔̞͑̌͂͊͊̌̽̇̿̄́͠h̷̠̥̲̳̔̓̑́̿̃̉̓̓̏̓

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 HOW EVIL! BUT I DOUBT IT!!!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I mean, yes, I have been neck deep in coils, but

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 YOU CAN TURN OFF YOUR KNOBS FOR A MONTH AND CHILL, MAN

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'm going to accuse him of kidnapping me, like a dastardly villain. He'll think it's funny.

🎶 If he doesn't, I'm telling him you said it.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 NYA HA HA

🐍 I LOOK FORWARD TO IT!!

🐍 AND HE'LL SAY "WHY WERE YOU TALKING ABOUT ME"

🐍 AND YOU'LL THINK ABOUT BEING NECK DEEP IN COILS

🐍 I WIN

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'll probably be neck deep in coils when he asks me.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 But see, listen, here's the thing, I don't want to turn off my knobs! That's—that's turning off my identity! Yes, I—I chose to be with my man, but I don't want to choose him Instead of what I'm doing, I want to choose him Along With what I'm doing.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 THEN BROADCAST WHILE YOU'RE SITTING WITH HIM. OH WAIT, NO, YOU'VE ESTABLISHED THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE

🐍 WHY NOT SEQUESTER A ROOM ABOARD THE AIRSHIP FOR BROADCASTING?

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Well apparently it was impossible the last three weeks! Three Weeks! Good lord!

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 :3a

🐍 YES, WE SIR PENTIOUSES ARE IRRESISTIBLE LIKE THAT! HAAA HAHAHA

🐍 GET OWNED!

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I believe I have been.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 WHY ARE THERE NO GIFS OF AIRHORNS

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 There's an idea, though. Probably not this airship, we're already tight enough for room—our kitchen looks like a hallway, you should see it sometime, it's ridiculous—and it's not as though we need a dedicated radio room; and anyway if I started formally Broadcasting out of the airship, well, then the jig is up, isn't it? But maybe on a future ship, once we need a reliable way for them to communicate with each other... and the secret's got to come out eventually, after that point it won't matter if everyone knows I'm broadcasting from his ship...

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Oh, I'll do you one better

https://youtu.be/QPM6FFD2eCk

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 NOW YOU'RE MAKING SENSE, MY DEAR CHAP!! THINKING AHEAD!!

🐍 LOUD AND POWERFUL

dontasktheradiodemon

((It immediately plays out of the nearest radio))

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍

🐍 YOU SCARED FAT SNAKE YOU BITCH

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'm a monster.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 SHE IS SLITHERING ABOUT, STARTLED!!!

🐍 ANYWAY I'M GOING TO SLEEP!!! YOU BETTER CATCH UP ON 3 WEEKS OF NO RADIO, NYA HA HA

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 Give her my sincerest apologies, I'll make it up to her on my next visit.

🎶 I'd better! Pray you don't wake up to a deluge of notifications.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 I LIKE IT WHEN YOU DO IT.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'm touched. Pray you do, then.

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 THERE ARE VERY SELECT FEW WHO ARE PERMITTED TO BOMBARD MY NOTIFICATIONS.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I'll consider it an honor, and abuse my privilege accordingly!

hiss-and-vinegar

🐍 THAT PINK ONE ISN'T ALLOWED.

dontasktheradiodemon

🎶 I—You know, I'm not going to argue that one.

[purplesurveys]

1345

Do you remember the last movie you saw while on a date? Are we still surprised this is still Knives Out? Hahahaha. I don’t think the answer will change for a while. How many purses do you own? Only a couple, but I regularly use just one. I prefer using my wallet and placing it in a bigger bag. Do you expect to be married in the next two years? Oh my goodness no. Only a whirlwind romance would make that possible at this point haha. What would you do if you found out you were pregnant? In a hypothetical world and assuming I’m with a hypothetical partner, I’d actually be super delighted and start getting ready for that new chapter of my life. Could you handle being married to the last person you texted? I don’t even want to start thinking about the idea of getting married to a parent.

What are you excited for? The weekend, haaaaaaa. What’s the last thing you put in your mouth? Fussili pasta, aka leftovers from New Year’s haha. Have you told anybody you loved them today? Yes, Angela’s parents and one of my aunts. Did you sleep alone last night? Yes. Do you currently have a hickey? No. Have you hugged or kissed anybody today? Other than my dogs, no. Who was the last person you took a picture with? Hans and Angela last night, when they unexpectedly picked me up last night and dragged me out to dinner. It was super sweet of them and I had lots of fun hehe. Who was the first person you texted this morning? I didn’t text anyone this morning but the first person I sent a message to through Messenger was Angela’s mom. Who will you be sleeping with tonight? Nobdy. What time did you go to sleep last night? I’m not so sure but it had to be anywhere between 2 and 3 AM. What kind of cell phone do you have? iPhone 8. Do your parents pay for it? I’m not sure if my dad continues to pay for it but he was the one who got me the phone. Would you rather pierce your tongue or lip? Lip. How old will you be on your next bday? I’ll be 24. Favorite thing to get at McDonald’s? I don’t really have a ‘favorite’ thing to get from McDonald’s, just because I feel like their menu isn’t too adventurous nor filling. If I had to get something from there I’d get either a Shake Shake Fries or McNuggets. If you’re on a laptop, how much charge does it have left? It’s plugged in most of the time now, so at the moment it’s at 100%. Do you know anyone named Alex? Yes, several people. Who’s house did you last sleep over at? My aunt and uncle’s. They invited me over to drink and encouraged me to stay the night since it was obviously unsafe for me to drive. Your first time having sex how old were you? I started fooling around a bit when I was 17, but didn’t start having sex til I turned 18. Top or Bottom? Bottom.  Ever had a one night stand? No, not interested. Ever gave/had a bj? Not a blowjob per se but I have given head. Watch porn? Just occasionally. Foreplay? Sure, if the mood is right. Would you ever record you having sex? I’ve never done it before but I’m open to it, sure.  Do you believe in sex before marriage? WELL

[maijily]

So heres Ali. Gave you a cyborg eye.

Also I think you might be the same age as me and that scares me.

Also I have a thing where I apparently know everyones alternate self and they all live near me and I think I might be you and my best friend is auther. Idk I’m just weird like that and its late and I need sleep so haaaaaaa. Enjoy. -Pan

Ali's Notes: How did you know you and I were the same-- OHHHH HEY LOOK AT THAT PORTRAIT!! I realize now that I never told you my hair color/length (I pondered it but decided ''not important information'' like an absolute moron and I deserve to be murdered for that), but'cha know what, HELL yes this is amazing. (How did you know I have a cyborg eye...? Ah, not important)

I kinda don't want to know how much work went into this because it'll just kill me inside knowing you spent so long on this with the stupid info I gave you, just... THANK YOU. I can't believe you're willing to put so much time into my fanatics, this is absolutely beautiful and, since you think we're so similar, know that I WISH I could be anything CLOSE to you.

[crybabykiko]

You need to sleep babie🥺🥺 But ig if you are awake i will fill your time🥰 BUT SLEEP SOON CAUSE ITS IMPORTANT!! 32, Sweet with Daichi pls🥺 I love you babie

Ah-ha-haaaaaaa- its because I'm a clown. You got it bb. 💖 

Song: Summer Girls by LFO (listen here) AAAAAAH PEAK 90s Summer! This song is from like, '99 but it was my older sister's fav and it just became one of those summer classics ya know? Nostalgia and bad rapping go hand in hand.

 Warnings: none really, sad at the end (???) but it’s still Fluff. 

 Participate in my Summertime Fine tag here! 

 Walking along the pier with your friends, you passed a group of boys you had never seen before. They looked at you, you looked at them, nothing crazy. You figured hey, just random tourists. It wasn't until you ran into them again at a bonfire for the locals that you realized maybe this was a fated encounter. 

Everyone was making s'mores and mingling, when you decided to introduce yourself to the unfamiliar faces. 

 "Hey, I'm y/n..." you started. "I uh-I've never seen you around here before."

 There was a dark haired one, he seemed to be the leader, as he spoke first. "I'm Daichi! These are my friends... say hi boys..." The two others awkwardly smiled and waved.

 "We're from a few towns over. We heard this place has some legendary summer parties, so we decided to scope it out." 

 You, knowing everything about your hometown, were intrigued by the trio, and you were especially automatically smitten with Daichi. You didn't expect you summer to start off like this, but you welcomed the possibility. 

The next few weekends were spent with all 3 of the boys and you. You showed them your hangouts, taught them your lingo, and spent all summer doing what young people do, living carelessly and having fun.

 On the last night of summer, there was always a last hurrah type of bonfire party, one that had good food, great music, and astonishing fireworks. You spent half the night looking for your new friends, but they were nowhere to be found. You were a little disappointed. But suddenly, you saw black as a pair of hands covered your eyes. It was Daichi. But he was all alone. 

 "Where are Suga and Asahi?" you asked?

 "They both got grounded for missing curfew," he responded, sucking on his teeth.

 "And you didn't?" 

 He laughed.

 "No, I definitely did... but I snuck out. Wanna go for a walk?" 

 For some reason, this made you nervous. Butterflies were piling up in your stomach at the thought of being alone with him. You had never been alone with him... what could he possibly want with you... alone? 

 You walked next to each other slowly, away from the roar of the crowd and the warmth of the fire. 

 "I've had a lot of fun with you this summer, y/n," Daichi began. He stopped short a minute, causing you to pause too.

 "I want to remember this feeling and live it forever."

 By then, the fireworks had started, your favorite part of the night. You started to run back toward the fire out of habit, only to be pulled back into his arms for a quick kiss. If this is what people in movies felt like, you understood why it was a big deal. The kiss was quick and warm. It knocked the wind out of you in the 0.2 seconds it took to happen. Stunned, you just instantaneously ran back to the crowd to watch the fireworks together. 

You didn't even realise you were still holding his hand. 

 You never saw him again after that day, but you'd always remember your Summer boy, and he would always remember his Summer Girl. 

 Ahahaaaaaaaaa It's almost 5am and I'm openly weeping

[glitchtrapfan]

Best Gift.

Specter was having trouble sleeping on the train, not because of the train moving along the tracks but because he keep thinking about one thing and that thing is Cagney’s birthday party.

Specter didn’t know what to give Cagney for a gift, he was running out of ideas and needed to think of one.

Specter realized that he needed help so he got out of his room and want into T bones room, Specter knock at his door and T bone answer.

“Specter you should be asleep it’s 3:14 AM.” T bone says not wearing anything and just looking like a normal skeleton.

“T bone did you ever give gifts to someone.”

“Well I did give one gift to someone which was a birthday card.”

“I should write a birthday card then.”

“Yes you should but you must write it like you mean it, put passion into it.” T bone says yawning loud.

“Thanks T bone.” Specter says as he leaves to go back into his room.

Specter grabs some paper and his pen and was about to write but then his head lands on the table and he falls asleep.

Specter wakes up still tired and look at his alarm clock, it was 1:03 PM and Specter realize he had no time to joke around anymore.

“What Am I going to do, Cagney’s birthday party is going to start in 4 hours and I have no clue what to do, I could write the card down but it might not be good enough.”

Specter was panicking but needed to calm down so he splashed some water on his face from the sink in his bathroom.

“Alright Specter think of what to give him, Cannot do the card because I don’t even know what to say, so think about what he might like.” Specter told himself through the mirror.

Specter look around his room and found some string and a compass.

Specter decided to make a locket, He removed everything inside the compass so he had just the gold metal and made holds at the bottom of it, then he put the string in it and after some short time got it to connect with the compass, he grab a pair of scissors and cut a photo of him and Cagney and put it in the compass.

“I hope this looks good to Cagney.” Specter says holding up the compass.

Specter saw it was 3:13 PM, so he went to the store to buy a gift box for his present, Specter also bought a bow tie and put it on his neck.

“I look nice today.” He said to himself as he got his gift and heads to Cagney’s birthday party.

Specter makes it the party and all his other friends are here, Hilda, Beppi, Grim, Von bon, Djimmi and Cala were all here.

“Hey Specter you got yourself a bow tie.” Hilda says looking at his floating eyes next to him.

“Yeah I needed to look good for the special day and I even got a gift.”

“Gift that means we all have gifts.” Beppi says excited about the party.

“I hope that he likes my gift.” Grim says nervously.

“Grim of course he will love it.” Djimmi says comforting Grim.

“Von Bon your gift will be the lamest.” Beppi says mocking Von bon.

“Says the guy who can’t even tie his shoes.”

“Who needs to tie when you got balloon shoes.”

“Hilda what did you come up with.” Cala ask Hilda.

“It’s a surprise.” Hilda says winking at them.

Cagney comes outside his house with a birthday hat and in his cute form.

“Today is my 25 birthday and I want to celebrate it with all my friends.” Cagney says.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY CAGNEY CARNATION!” Everybody says.

Cagney comes over and hugs everybody.

“So what crazy gifts do you guys have.” Cagney says sitting down on a chair.

Grim goes first and breaths fire in the air.

“Great your going to burn down the forest.” Cagney says looking up at the fire.

Grim wrote a message in the fire saying. “Thank you for being a great friend.”

Specter was amazed at what Grim did.

Cagney claps.

“Love it Grim but make sure not to burn down the forest.” Cagney says.

“Sorry Cagney.” Grim says sitting back down.

Cala gets up and grabs some water bottles, she drinks them all and spits out the water on the ground.

The message said. “Cagney is the best.”

Cagney claps and Specter was again amazed by the gift.

“I love it but felt the same as Grim.”

“Well I got a present that’s different from the others.” Von bon says as she gets out a huge cake.

Everyone was shock at how big it was.

“Take that everyone, I have the better gift.” Von bon says as the cakes start to fall backwards and crash into the ocean behind them.

“HAAAAAAA!” Cagney turns into his normal form and burst out laughing, Beppi does the same.

Specter felt bad for Von bon, must have took her long to make it.

“Now it’s me and Djimmi’s turn.” Beppi says.

Beppi and Djimmi make shadow puppets with there hands, it shows Cagney eating people, Him takings over the town and then falling asleep.

Cagney loved it and hugs them.

Specter realized that his gift might not be that great.

“Cagney those gift are great but let’s show how it’s really done.” Hilda says as she turns into her flying form and goes into the sky.

She makes the stars follow her and turn them into words.

The words came together and read “Cagney is the greatest friend ever and I’m so glad we meant that first time when we were young.”

Hilda flys back down and next to Cagney.

Cagney hugs Hilda and kiss her cheek.

Everyone was clapping but Specter was much slower, He felt like his gift was a joke now at this point.

“Specter your the last one.” Cagney says waving his hand over to come to him.

Specter hesitated but comes over with his gift.

“It’s not really that great, Everyone put more effort then me.” Specter says looking down at the ground.

“Specter don’t be sad, are gifts were just more stylish.” Hilda says.

“Specter your gift will be fine.” Cagney says opening the gift.

Cagney saw the locket and pick it up, he then open it to find him and Specter hugging.

“I know it’s not very creative.” Specter says ready for the worse.

“Specter this is.... the best gift today.”

“WHAT!” Everybody But Specter and Cagney says.

Specter looks up in confusion.

“Cagney i don’t understand.” Specter says looking at him.

“Your gift is the only gift that I can actually keep with me, Everybody else had great gifts to show but I couldn’t keep them.” Cagney says putting the locket over his neck.

“My cake would be too if it didn’t fall.” Von bon says.

“Cagney it’s not great as Hilda or Beppi and Djimmi.”

“Your right it’s not creative but even the uncreative can be the best gift.” Cagney says hugging Specter.

“Thank you Specter, your gift was amazing and I’ll keep it forever.”

Specter hugs back and smiles wide.

“Still not better then mine.” Beppi says and gets hit on the head by Djimmi.

Everyone want home feeling something different, Specter felt something he never thought he would feel again and that is love.

Specter goes to bed and actually gets some well deserved sleep.

Wednesday will be the day where I write new stories, Hope you enjoy and comment if you like it as well.

[ottobooty]

4, 19, 24, 37, 45, 57, 65, 74, 80, 96

Neoma,,,,,,,

4. how did your elementary school teachers describe you?

Problem child. Trouble Maker. Gifted. 

19. sleeping position?

Fetal position usually. Sometimes I’m a starfish or I sleep on my stomach.

24. favorite crystal?

Snowflake Obsidian.

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

Duffel bag. I feel like I can fit more in a duffel than I can a suitcase.

45. which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero?

Sci-fi Fantasy. I....don’t really like superhero films.

57. the three biggest struggles you’ve overcome?

Loving myself, recognizing negative self talk and when it;s RSD, not talking over friends when they’re talking to me about things.

65. any permanent scars?

My tattoos HA HAAAAAAA. And my laparoscopy scars on my stomach.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

I’m a stubborn bastard and I usually have to be at an 8 before I give in.

80. earth tones or jewel tones?

B...both?

96. desktop background?

[wtfocklvr]

Thank u @hugunderthestars <3

Rules: answer these 20 questions and then tag as many other people as you want

Naturally I’m going to do Zoenne <3<3

1. When did you start to ship them? Since wtFOCK first started because I fall in love with every Noorhelm!

2. How much do you ship them 1-10? A Million

3. Why do you ship them? They're so in love and I love it. Senne is literally a little puppy dog in front of Zoë and it’s adorable. They have insane chemistry and they were both there for each other when they were vulnerable.

4. My opinion: OTP ENDGAME LOVES OF MY LIFE OWN MY HEART FOREVER AND EVER

5. Favourite scene? My favourite scene is when Zoë receives the “nothing happened” text from Viktor and runs to Senne.

6. Favorite quote? Iconic: “Zeker als die al vol zit met jou” shbdjwbehjwbshnas I LOVE THAT SOOOOO MUCH

7. Favorite social media post? “Smoelentrekker” and “My Happy Place” because they were so happy that day!

8. An underrated moment of them? I don’t know if it’s underrated but like can we talk about the passion and emotion in my favourite scene. Likeeee the running to him and dragging him into a classroom.

9. The most heartbreaking moment? Senne confronting Zoë, obviously...

10. Funniest moment? When Senne finds his blanket, that Zoë took, on her bed.

11. The song that reminds you the most of them? ahhhhhhh there’s so many so: Someone to Stay - Vancouver Sleep Clinic, Always - Gavin James, Nightcall - London Grammar, You’re Mine - Oscar and the Wolf, Big Jet Plane - Angus & Julia Stone

12. Favourite change they made from the og? Okay obviously Senne taking Zoë to the police station but I also liked the way they did Zoë’s interaction with Gill.

13. A change from the og you didn’t like? Would’ve loved an “I know what you’re playing other than girls” line from Zoë

14. Something you wish to see from them? Honestly anything! They’re adorable.

15. Favourite moment in s1? Zoë confronting Senne after he’s rude to Amber

16. Favourite moment in s2? Haaaaaaa I keep going back to this but their reunion at school. Also, the last scene and, of course, their reunion when Senne’s going to leave

17. What do you love the most about them? They’re both just generally morally right people and I love how they’ve both supported each other.

18. What do you miss the most about them? THEM. JUST THEM. So basically EVERYTHING :) Honestly barely coping without them.

19. Any headcanons? Idk just anything where they’re being cute

20. Random thought about them? CAN I HAVE A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THEIRS ONE DAY? and also can a Senne come into my life right now? But actually though my random thought is that Zoë, Jana, Robbe, Amber etc are all the same age as me! Like we’re in the same school year and it’s so strange because they seem so much older. I can’t imagine having such a serious relationship right now.

@emptytattooss @itsallaskam @edonori @gendryaisendgame @lackofadrenaline

[lumiilys]

Sometimes I just have soft thoughts about being in a polyamorous relationship with Jumin and Jihyun

It’s 11pm and I’m sleep deprived, please forgive me if it doesn’t make sense

• warmn cuddles jejdjejdjdjdj

• baking and dancing together

• THROWING FLOUR AT JUMIN

• jihyun making tea for everyone in the morning before work and cuddling in bed while drinking it

• coming home and seeing them cuddling and watching dramas or something and then joining them haaaaaaa

• big warm baths together, lots of bubbles

• lots of throwing bubbles

• so many cuddles

• teaching Jumin about commoners stuff

• teaching Jumin to cook something other than pancakes

• then cooking dinner together

• WATCHING THE SUNSET TOGETHER

• DID I MENTION UUUUUUH CUDDLES?????

• Elizabeth is baby and you know it

• Peaceful walks together all holding hands

• Painting with Pwi 💙💙💙

• cuddling in a big warm bed in the middle of winter shhshshs warm and soft

• c- cuddles!!!

hhhhhh I can’t fuckgin put my thoughts into words but I love them so Damn much please help. I can’t convey it properly dhdjfjfj

[dontasktheradiodemon]

Party in Pentious’ Parlor - roundabouts Oct 24

In which Angel (@sluttyspiderpolkacock) and Alastor come over to Sir Pentious’s (@hiss-and-vinegar​) and Valera’s (@autokrates​) hotel room for a little hangout/party. Which is interrupted when the eggs that Valera’s been carrying decide now is the perfect time to escape.

Things get very exciting and dramatic for a bit there, especially considering that the eggs aren’t even fertilized.

Highlights include: Angel and Alastor getting invited, respectively, to be Valera’s babe of honor and Sir Pentious’s best man; Valera repeatedly going This Is Fine :) while laying fucking eggs; Alastor deciding teleporting a bunch of booze bottles into midair and letting them crash on the carpet is a great idea; Angel getting all emotionally invested in a bunch of eggs before learning they’re duds; and Sir Pentious fainting in the bath tub.

Valera

Party in Pentious' Parlor is go! Alastor was set to bring snacks, but Valera had prepared drinks for the evening in advance. A few bottles of various alcohols had been set aside, alongside chilled water and a few juices to either enjoy on their own or for mixing purposes. One last look around, hands on her hips. Drinks, check. Entertainment... Some ASMR videos and an eclectic assortment of movies they could fall back on if the music wasn't enough.

Yeah, that seemed sufficient. This wasn't a proper soiree with the nobility, no need to break out the band. A waggle of her fins, and she drops down on the couch, the door to Pentious' suite opening at the flick of her wrist. Prrprrprr

Sir Pentious

Ah, excellent. A party! Sir Pentious didn't sit around doing nothing, he was at the very least helping set things up and throwing Eggbois out of the room.

Valera looked close to bursting and he'd be redamned if he'd let her fall down or something equally as embarrassing. Tail support whenever necessary. Once everything was all set up, he coiled up by the couch, chin resting on his hands as he lay his elbows on himself.

"THE PARTY LOOKS EXQUISITE, MY DEAR."

Valera

Throwing out the eggbois was a monumental task in and of itself, there was always another one popping out of a drawer wearing Val's bra as a headpiece.. Or maybe that was just the one time. Either way, the room was sufficiently cleared for the evening, and that meant Val could take this brief privacy to reach over and slide her hand into Pentious'. Once they had proper guests, he'd most likely try to maintain a bit of distance, so. Best to get her sappiness in now.

"Couldn't have done it without your help, dearest. Are you excited?"

Sir Pentious

"I SUPPOSE I AM! WILL I GET TO SHOOT ANYONE THIS TIME AS WELL? NYAAAA HA HAAAAAAA!"

Nothing like an incredibly loud maniacal laugh right next to your head. Pentious ASMR. His fingers glide over the ring, and he *beams*.

Valera

She snorts, scooting closer to press a kiss to Penny's cheek. Hard to imagine a time when that cackle had been enough to startle her out of sleep. She barely even noticed it now.

"You're not allowed to shoot Angel Dust. Alastor is at your discretion. But if you do, warn me so I can start recording."

Sir Pentious

He's grinning so wide, "FROM THE CONVERSATION THAT WE HAD BEFORE, I DOUBT HE'LL DO ANYTHING THAT COULD WARRANT MY SHOOTING HIM!! HE SEEMS TO WANT TO REMAIN ON HIS BEST BEHAVIOR AROUND ME! WHICH I AM FINE WITH, I DO NOT HAVE TO WATCH OVER MY SHOULDER."

He will anyway, because he's Sir Pentious.

Valera

"He's certainly desperate to befriend you, love. Though actually, that does remind me. In the interest of not having this party go the way Broadway almost did.." An unpleasant memory even now! They'd talked after, sure, but he'd been so upset. The guilt lingered for *weeks.* Her hand squeezes his, tight as she dares.

"I'm going to need you to set the boundaries here. I'll follow your lead, but. Some kind of structure to fall back on would help. Obviously I'm not going to try and straddle you in the middle of the party, but. You know." A wiggle of their clasped hands. She's not sure even THIS would be alright!

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious is watching her with his big wide eyes, watching all of her gesturing and fin flicks. What?? Oh.

He waves a hand, "I AM FINE WITH CONTACT. AS LONG AS ANGEL DUST DOES NOT TRY ANY UNTOWARD ADVANCES ON MY PERSONAGE, THEN I WILL NOT RAISE A FUSS."

Valera

That was both reassuring and completely not helpful at the same time. A sigh, and she smiles at him, a glint of mischief entering her eyes.

"Alright, got it. Drape across your coils and hang off you like a designer scarf."

Sir Pentious

"IF YOU INSIST."

He shrugs! Look at him, this man is socialized to his fish wife. He's really to have a party!!

Valera

Oh. That wasn't the reaction she'd expected. She's caught a bit off guard there, but she manages to dull her reaction down to a nonplussed sort of stare instead of an outright sputter. A few weeks ago he'd have stared at her _aghast_ at the very _idea_ of the faintest whisper of PDA.

"Oh. Well, alright then! I'd expected-- Nevermind." She clears her throat, shifting to sit up properly. "Come here then. I'm not going to make my fiance sit on the floor in his own suite. I'm sure the couch can handle both of us just fine."

Sir Pentious

He slowly uncoils himself, sliding up onto the couch and leaning her head to his shoulder.

A few weeks ago, he hadn't proposed. He was *flying.*

Valera

Well wasn't this nice? Look at him go! From barely tolerating a hand hold to _manually placing_ her head on his shoulder. Not that she'd resisted in the slightest, her arms had wrapped around him the second she clued in on what he was trying to accomplish. Is this fiance privilege? Must be. Gods only know what he'll decide to okay when they're actually married.

Prrr..

Alastor

The party don't start until the Radio Demon walks in because the Radio Demon is the only guy in Hell who always shows up to a party with snacks, and not crappy snacks like a single bag of chips. And also because as far as the Radio Demon was concerned the party did not actually exist until he was present to observe it.

"Hello~! Now, look at this—THIS is a room to have an event in! My! When you check out, we'll have to leave it like this to hold special events." He set a large tray covered in tiny sandwiches next to the drinks, and then poured himself some juice. Gotta have a glass of something in his hand. "That plate on the top right has Veci meat, by the way—I believe both of you had a hand in getting that to me?" He nodded to Valera and Sir Pentious.

Valera

Now, normally Valera would extract herself from Pentious the second she caught the faintest hints of static in the air. But with this sudden shift in boundaries, and the level of comfort she's at? She doesn't even move beyond raising a hand to wave hello to their first guest of the evening. If anything she lays herself out further, giving her fiance a little squeeze as she flashes Alastor her most winning smile.

"Ooh, I'll have to try those later! Glad you could make it, Alastor. Come have a seat, we've just been chit chatting about what we've been up to the last few days. Katsu's been doing his damndest to stress me out, it seems."

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious is a happy snake! C: What a good smile. At the sight of Alastor, he perks up a little more, his hood opening just a touch and he wiggles his talons in the deerman's direction. Ah! Meat of that shark-like veci that Penny shot to death at the first ever party he'd been to with Valera's people. What a fun evening that was.

Angel

Failing to show fashionably late would've been such a movie star faux pas, especially for the most ( in ) famous porn actor in all of Hell. He wasn't irresponsible, however, as he too touted platters and platters of baked goods he'd ( compulsively ) spent the last 24 hours baking ( of his complete and total free will ) . Six of them. A rather ambitious balancing act for the ways his bones begged he BOOGEY, but if nothing else, he was a Pro.

" VALERA ~ ! BABY ~ ! " Angel belted a dramatic entrance as a pop of his hip bumped the door fully ajar. " Good ta see ya! " A nod to each the other gentleman as he set the breadths of his labors beside the other snacks. " Tell me if I'm wrong, but I believe THESE are ya favorites? " He kept the last plate on his person to bring to the lounging couple, a flourish of frosted silver upon their laps. Saving himself the potential conflict of planting a kiss on Valera's forehead, he saluted back to Alastor.

" Ya get dibs on the muffins, Smiles, since I know ya liked 'em ~ "

Alastor

Oh what was Angel doing with snacks? Alastor was to be the snack supplier. Hmph.

On the other hand: more snacks. And Angel's got to do something to offload his recent surplus, Alastor supposed. "Very generous!"

He grabbed a muffin, pulled up a chair near the couch, sat, and replied to Valera's comment. "That's your... nephew, isn't it? Why, what sort of trouble is he getting himself into?"

Valera

If she hadn't been wrapped around Pentious, Valera would have flung herself at Angel, eggs or no eggs. Alas, she must settle for beaming up at her favorite spider as she takes one of her, oh yes, _very much_ favorite treats. "Darlin', I'm so glad to see you. Wouldn't be the same without you here!"

Give her a moment while she devours a snack, _then_ she can turn her attention to Alastor, settling back down against Pentious to _bask_. "The very one. The silly boy thinks he has to use his power to try and fix everything he sees." A pointed raise of her eyebrow at the radio demon. Oh yes, she knows. "Negotiating with demons, throwing himself into danger.. You know, the average hero complex."

Sir Pentious

Oh Angel was here. Sir Pentious' head does that Cobra-esque head movement of sizing someone up as the spider-demon walks in, holding platters of snacks. Hmm! Those would have to be investigated, though for the moment he was content to remain here with his tail slithered all around the couch. He is Looking.

"A FOOLISH LAD, INDEED. WASTING HISSS TIME ON A HERO COMPLEX, HE COULD BE TAKING MATTERSSSS INTO HISSS OWN HANDSSS TO CRUSH HISSS ENEMIES AND NAYSSSAYERSSS."

He's looking up at Angel, still, though the comment was not pointed towards him.... and then he's kind of looking away... What does one SAY to Angel Dust without provoking him or being provoked in return? Hmm. A thought comes to mind! "SSSO! WHAT KIND OF FAVORSSS AM I PRIVY TO, ANGEL DUSSST?" Oh, that part.

Angel

Deepset chuckles reverberated his fluff as he draped his long limbs over the far end of the couch, an idle hand affectionately twirling a strand of Valera's hair. " They ain't SPIKED or anythin', Pen! Ya have my word I wouldn't be doin' that ta y'all ~ " he responded with a fingergun followed by a sneer, " Unless, a course, ya wanna cash in that favor I owe YOU fa layin' off m'boss. THEN we can 'ave us one a MY parties! "

His many eyes glazed over the display as he trailed his snickers. Protein was probably a safer bet than all the carbs he'd inadvertently been loading upon himself. He quickly realized how increasingly WEAK he became for good food the more time he spent at the hotel. Moderation. He'd be fine with moderation. Angel easily reached across the spread for the smallest sandwich to painstakingly nibble on.

" Youse gotta do-gooder nephew? " he asked through pursed lips, " I... think I seen 'em. If he's doin' any DEALIN' though, can't 'elp but think a the usual resident suspect ~ " Angel bobbed the toe of his crossed leg in Alastor's direction. " So. What's my nephew-in-law been gettin' into? As resident drunk uncle, I'm obligated ta know an' give some super sus' advice. "

Alastor

He makes a mental note of which sandwich Angel went for; if he's gonna keep their hotel guest fed, he's got to know what he eats, doesn't he?

He shrugs off the accusation. Making deals with someone's nephew? Certainly isn't him. "Yes, do tell! You're going to have to unpack this 'do gooder' idea a little more for us! You see—in the part of the mortal realm where I came from, making deals with demons is the exact opposite of what a hero does."

Valera

Valera adjusts her position slightly, tail curling around to loosely drape over Angel Dust's waist. Affection for affection, who wouldn't appreciate having their hair played with by the prettiest spider in the joint? It was either that or a glorified seatbelt in case Pentious tried to shove him off. Either way, it's a *heavy* tail. "Oh you wouldn't believe it, Angel Dust. The boy's... Eighteen? Nineteen? And thinks he has to help everyone. Complete bleeding heart. That's only started getting shaken now, since his fool of a mother made a bad deal with Alastor and paid the price for it." A pause, and she nods towards Stick. "Not this one, I mean Match."

She sighs, eyes rolling. "I can't comment on the morality of dealing with demons, but. Apparently he thinks it could work out as long as he negotiated his terms better than she did. And he isn't *wrong*, necessarily, but why make a deal in the first place? Like Penny said, he's already powerful enough on his own without a demon's help."

Angel

" Ah, poor kid. I remember kids, but they were Forty-Two Gang kids. Not so bright-eyed and bushy-tailed as ya nephew sounds... unless ya can count a fuckin' fix fa murder bright-eyed an bushy-tailed. I GUESS ya can... " He thought hard, more so mouthing a sliver of meat than having intention to chew and swallow. Yet.

" What's he tryna' get outta dealin' wit' a demon? Some fine print ta hilight? A loophole ta wiggle through an' give the basta'd a taste a their own medicine? If he's got any fresh takes on double crossin' the likes a the devils, I'm gonna 'aveta hit 'em up. " Dare he say he's been trying to do just that with his own deal he'd been trapped in for the last... eighty years or so...? No. He couldn't be doing that. What he did need was a drink. Angel placed his once-bitten sandwich on a napkin and went for an entire wine bottle as the thumb of another hand gently stroked Valera's tail for comfort. For anchoring. As they spoke, he was already hitting the clouds.

" He bein'... careful at least? Careful as ya can be when dealin' wit' a- ah fuck it. " Angel took out his phone as he took a long swig. " I'm givin' 'im a talkin to. What's his url again? "

Alastor

Paid the price, hah. Alastor would say it was his alternate who paid a price for her dissatisfaction with her bargain—but he supposes he's just a little bit biased, isn't he?

"Sounds bright-eyed and busy-tailed to me!" Alastor sees why Angel likes those kids. Heck, Alastor kinda likes them now and he hasn't even met them. "So, when you get right down to it, Katsu's motive is less heroism and more of an ego trip? Mommy makes a mistake and her baby boy wants to run out and do the exact same thing, just to prove to her that he can do it better?" Alastor scoffs. "How disrespectful. Childishly so."

He glances at Angel's barely touched sandwich. "I brought a half dozen different types if you don't like that one."

Valera

A shrug, and she squeezes her tail a little tighter around her legitimate and befluffed spider spouse. "Stolen-Godhood, Angel. With a hyphen. The url is literal, but he's a sweet kid. Fair warning that he'll call you uncle given the opportunity, he's big on found family."

Valera glances to Alastor, somewhere close to amused. "All he told me was he wanted to try to improve things. If that's an ego trip, it's an unusually selfless one. Though I think if I were his age I'd be inclined to do the same thing. Proving that you can do better than your elders is part of the standard teenage angst!" She squints, reaching out for a pair of sandwiches. One for herself, the other to drop into Pentious' hand. "..Though I think he'd fit in pretty well with those kids of yours, Angel. He's already offered massive violence on my behalf and *really* wants to steal the wallets from all my guests."

Sir Pentious

Oh! Excellent. A sandwich for Sir Pentious. He was going to have to get up for one but now he doesn't need to move, other than to lift the snack to his mouth and begin nibbling away. Mostly he's just been listening to this conversation about his foolish nephew that he did not know all too well, but one that seemed to desperately want to be close to him.

Found family, hmn... "DOES KATSSSU NOT HAVE ANYONE ELSSSSE? I ALWAYSSS THOUGHT MEREDITH LOOKED RATHER YOUNG TO BE HISSS MOTHER, BUT I AM ONE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY OR SO YEARS OLD, SSSO WHAT DO I KNOW?" A big grin, his eyes squinting into amused half moons before he turned to look over at Alastor, gesturing with the sandwich in hand.

"THESE ARE GOOD!"

Angel

" N-no! They're good! Ditto's ta Penny! I'm just, uh, pacin' m'self. Gotta keep this body flawless, ah ~ ? " he sang with another long swig before finally allowimg the bottle to dangle off the edge of the sofa, " I'll, er... try 'em all... " A lie? A wish? Not even he could tell, but he found himself distracted by a flurry of anonymous messages offering him affections.

" Uncle Angel's got a nice ring to it, " he mused, freeing his third set of hands run along the smooth, satisfying surface of that gorgeous tail, " Those lil' buggers are prolly runnin' around somewhere down 'ere, but if they ever found ME out, SHIT would I 'ave some fuckin' PROBLEMS on m'hands. Yeah. They'd get along wit' ya nephew, alright. TOO FUCKIN' WELL. Nothin' about the wallets. They could EAT the fuckin' rich fa all I care, but I wouldn't trust 'em not ta get on Big V's bad side. Can't go... RISKIN' THAT. "

Oh would you look at that, the bottle's empty. He needs another. After placing the empty glass down beside the leg of the sofa, Angel reaches to do just that.

Alastor

“I can think of few goals more egotistical than to decide one has both the authority and the ability to shove one’s way into everyone else’s problems, fix everything for these poor helpless strangers, and then go home to congratulate oneself on one’s heroism.” Alastor shakes his head, tisk tisk. “Someone who truly wants to help asks HOW to help—and you didn’t mention this nephew of yours asking. On the other hand, someone who just barges in only wants to flaunt what a good person he is. Just another way to stroke off an overly-engorged sense of self-importance.”

Alastor beams at Sir Pentious. He’d hoped so! “I can give you the recipe.” It isn’t far off from something Sir Pentious himself might bring to a picnic, in Alastor’s opinion—soft bread, meat so tender it nearly falls apart—but pizzazzed up.

He waves Angel back when he sees him reaching for the table. "No no, allow me!" He's not getting him more wine. He's getting him one of each sandwich. That's what you said you wanted, isn't it? Isn't it, Angel? "These rapscallions of yours sound fun! If you do run into them, bring them by the hotel!"

Valera

Valera hums, resting her head on Pentious' chest as she thinks back. Did she have any spicy backstory? Not specifically, but if he followed the same trend as the others she'd known... "I think he got disowned by his biological family? Possibly for protecting a woman from being accosted by a drunk politician, but I'd have to ask for specifics." A shrug, fingers tippy tapping up to grip her fiance's shoulders as she pointedly side-eyes Alastor. "I could be off base, but I think that's what happened. Having a criminal record in Japan can ruin your life. Assault charges against a man in power? Even worse."

But that was neither here nor there. "Regardless. I'd be very sad to see a bunch of bratty kids get on the bad side of any Overlord! Keep a few eyes out, my dearest Angel. I'm sure Charlie would love to get her hands on them." Another affectionate squeeze, muscles rippling under Angel's hands as he strokes along her scales. Oh, but she purrs. Too bad she can't reach the sandwiches without getting up, she's eyeing the Veci flesh hardcore.

Angel

Angel zones out a few, processing the things Alastor says. He was right. To his surprise. His words sounded like they came straight out of some self-help manual the resident lesbian hotel staff kept insisting he read. Which he totally has. In a hypothetical world where he had x-ray vision.

Valera was also right. He couldn't be letting ANYTHING happen to those kids. He'd have to do so under his boss' radar. Can't have THAT sort of reputation hitting the elite, right? Right? Everyone was SO right. It was overwhelming. WHERE WAS THE WINE? HE SWORE IT WAS THERE-

OH, this was very WRONG. Angel finally came too at the sight of a full plate in front of him. His eyes widened and sparkled like the post Extermination sky, but his brows steeped with guilt. Nonetheless, he mustered a teary grin. He couldn't be rude. He'd have to. For many reasons. Most apparent was the hint of drool and all but immediate pleading of his bowels to Get A Grip. He compromised by offering Valera the Veci sandwich out of Alastor's selection. That was the one he started with, right?

" I'm... gonna have to, " he relented with a drag of his sights to the adjacent corner of the room as he took another bite from a sandwich at random. His expression reacted with bliss. " I wouldn't TRUST THEM ta their own devices soon as their hypothetical stake down 'ere hits reality. It comes ta that, I'm gonna be countin' on y'all. "

Alastor

He shrugs off the side-eye on the grounds that he knows he's said and done nothing to warrant it.

Well, if Valera wants the Veci sandwiches, they should say something! Alastor can lean over, grab the plate, and offer it to—oh, Angel got to it. Alastor gives Angel a sharp look for giving away his food; but he started out with that flavor, didn't he? He'll let it slide. Instead Alastor serves himself one and offers the plate to Sir Pentious, want one?

"If they are down here, they've most likely been dead for decades, haven't they? I'm sure they can handle themselves as well as anybody can by now." Angel might have known them as children, but that isn't what they are anymore, not a chance.

Valera

Luxury was a fancy little sandwich being handed to you while you lounge on your man's chest. She accepts the sandwich with a cheerful wiggle of her fins, and a moment later it's gone.

"Mmm! Delicious, you'd never guess he was so insufferable in life. Fine work, Alastor." A pause while she shifts her position again, a hand moving down to rub her stomach. Maybe that was enough food for now, her innards were complaining. "I assume you've heard all about the soiree by now, yes?"

Sir Pentious

*Politicians.* Ah, that would do it, wouldn't it. SIr Pentious doesn't have much to contribute to the conversation, mostly just watching the others and petting Valera's hair. And then he's kind of being addressed again! More sandwiches!! He will happily take the veci meat kind, and bite into it. Mmmm... murderous intent.

"I HADN'T TOLD HIM HOW IT HAD GONE--IT ssssSLIPPED MY MIND."

Angel

Since when was the Radio Demon the angel on anyone's shoulder? He nodded reflectively and sunk back into the sandwiches. They really were good. He could easily absentmindedly eat the whole plate before realizing what he was doing- oh there went HALF.

Alastor

Alastor perks up at the mention of the soirée. "I keep meaning to ask for the story, and we keep getting on other topics instead." He turns away from Angel now that he's sure he's eating and focuses his attention on Sir Pentious. "I've been dying all over again to hear the bloody details!"

Valera

Oh good, Angel was handling the sandwiches without her help. Thank goodness for that! Maybe between the three demons, they could actually clear a platter, bunch of skinny old men that they were.

Valera looks at Pentious in mock offense, gasping ever so daintily as she presses a hand to her cheek. "All this time and you didn't tell him? Well you'd better get to it before I do, my dear. I doubt anyone but Angel would want to hear *my* version of the story."

Sir Pentious

"IT DID NOT COME UP AND I DIDN'T REMEMBER TO TELL HIM!!! AS I SSAID, IT SSLIPPED MY MIND!" Something something old man. Anyway, he sits up straighter, splaying his talons against his chest as he begins to recount the tail, "VALERA INVITED ME TO ONE OF HER PEOPLES' PARTIES! SOME FANCY TO DO, THAT SsssORT OF THING. I KNEW THAT THAT ONE MAN, THE SSSTEWARD THAT HASSS BEEN PESSSTERING VALERA SSO, HE WAS AN ENORMOUS BRUTE OF A FELLOW. HE REALLY MADE A POOR FIRSSSST IMPRESSION, YOU SEE, AS HE CONTINUALLY REFERRED TO VALERA AS 'RUNT' TO HER FACE! AND TO MINE."

Sir Pentious produces his cane--where was he keeping that--and holds it up, "SO I WARNED HIM NOT TO INSSSULT VALERA, FOR SHE WAS BETTER THAN HIM, AND TO NOT INSSSULT ME, EITHER. HE CONTINUED TO DO SSSO.... AND SO, I DID WHAT ANY GENTLEMAN WORTH HISSSS *SALT* WOULD." With a press of a button, the cane transformed into that automatic tinkertoy looking rifle, "I PRESSED THE MUZZLE OF MY RIFLE AGAINST THE SIDE OF HIS HEAD AND BLEW HIS ssssssSKULL APART! NYAAAA HA HA HA HA HAHAAAAAAAAA!"

Alastor

"Oh, I'm sure your version of the story is plenty fascinating," he tells Valera; but yeah, he wants Sir Pentious's. As evidenced by the fact that as soon as Sir Pentious starts telling it, his attention is totally riveted—complete with his invisible studio audience providing oohs, aahs, and applause where appropriate.

He nearly scoots off the edge of his seat when he leans forward to inspect the tinkertoy rifle-cane. "Did you make—? Well, of course you did, what a stupid question! Clever, very clever!" Can he hold it? He wants to hold it. He's half reaching for it like he's just waiting for an invitation to touch it. "Was this the kind of party where committing a murder to defend the honor of one's betrothed is encouraged, or did you two have to beat a hasty retreat?"

Valera

Valera had been content to let Pentious tell the story, but Alastor's questions were enough to have her snort, blurting out a response before she could think about it. "What, you think I'd have to run from my own party?! In my own--" Ahem. She clears her throat, laying herself back down.

"Apologies. Don't mind me. Go on, dear."

Sir Pentious

Oh Alastor is doing the grabby hands. Sir Pentious eyes him a moment before handing the weapon off. It's not loaded anymore, anyway.

"NO NO, WE DIDN'T RUN. IT WAS VALERA'S COURT. THEY COULDN'T *TOUCH* ME. WOULDN'T DARE! I MADE THEM ALL MY--".... Sweats. He clears his throat, "I MADE THEM *QUITE* AWARE OF WHO I *AM*. THEY WERE ALL *QUIVERING* BEFORE MY MIGHT!! OHHH, IT WAS *INVIGORATING.*"

Alastor

“Well, how should I know! On Earth, if a world leader’s fiancé murders someone during a state party, the party’s overrun by police and journalists and that’s the end of the event; in Hell, the same act would probably garner polite applause.”

He eagerly claims the cane and starts examining it, turning it over in his hands and holding it close to study how it re-folds itself when it switches between rifle and cane. Oh, what a beautiful piece of work. He’d love to try this out, see whether the gimmick has taken away from any of its efficiency as a gun...

What did you make them, Sir Pentious? All your what? Go on, Alastor would love to hear. Look at that smirk of his, and it’s getting wider. Whadja make ‘em? “A first impression they won’t soon be forgetting, I’m sure! Pity I didn’t get to see it—you are a sight when you’re performing for an audience!” He’s a sight to see at any time. Go on, keep preening. “No doubt they’d never been in the presence of a bona fide supervillain before.”

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious is really basking in this praise and attention. Look at him! He's petting his talons down his hood, his eyes are closed as he smiles. Oh, he is bad and he knows it!

"THEY ARE TOO USED TO THEIR MAGIC, IT SEEMED. MY MACHINES ARE A COMPLETE *MYSTERY* TO THEM, AND WITH MY FIRST VIOLENT ACT, I WENT FROM MERE PALACE RUMOR TO *FEARSOME LEGEND.* AH, IT WAS LIKE MY LIVING DAYS, THOSE FINAL YEARS! UNTOUCHABLE AND POWERFUL! NO ONE COULD COMPARE TO MY MAGNIFICENCE!!!" He takes Valera's hand, and presses a kiss to it. There's a ring there! "I WON'T HAVE ANY MEMBERS OF THAT COURT INSSSULTING MY LOVE TO MY FACE, OR BEHIND MY BACK. THEY WILL BE DEALT WITH SSSSWIFTLY."

Angel

OH. There's a RING NOW! Angel takes to it with a similar but respectfully distant interest as Alastor took to the cane. He stretches over his now empty platter a little. _He wants to see it, TOO..._

Alastor

“And no one’s ever going to compare, I’m sure! A bunch of too-proud magicians who don’t know what to do in front of a few pieces of cleverly constructed steel—not all that different from down here, is it?”

It’s why Alastor’s convinced that Sir Pentious is the only wanna-be conqueror with a shot at the throne: in terms of magic, the strongest sinner will never equal a fallen angel—but the most sublime, secular human virtue is the capacity to invent machinery that far surpasses any mere mortal’s strengths. Sure, John Henry beat the drill machine—once—but imagine if he’d been running it. And imagine if Sir Pentious had designed it.

For a second there Alastor got so caught up in this man-overthrows-the-devil fantasy that he almost misses the new ring. (It only briefly squeezes his heart.) So that IS what Sir Pentious was robbing a jewelry store for. Alastor knew it.

... He teleports another sandwich onto Angel’s plate while he’s distracted.

Valera

Ah, looks like Angel's caught on! Valera purrs, eyes squinting up as she glances over to her totally legit spusband. "Ah! Yes, we never told them, dearest. Here, Angel, admire my love's workmanship." She pulls her hand away, turning her head to give Pentious a quick peck to the lips as she extends her hand out for the local spider to get a good look at. Oh yes, it *is* shaped nontraditionally. An eel curled around her finger, woven through tiny holes pierced through the webbing to twist in a dramatic shape.

She is looking VERY smug about this. She's been DYING to talk about this since he proposed.

Sir Pentious

Yep. This man's ego is being inflated so much he'll probably float away at this rate. And now everyone was looking at the ring that Valera was wearing.

"I DESIGNED *AND* CRAFTED THAT NUMBER MYSsssSELF! ONLY THE ABSsssOLUTE BESSST FOR MY WIFE."

Angel

" Holy shit that's BLINDIN'! " Angel exclaimed with drama dialed to eleven. He quickly jerked back upon realizing he made himself a fluff sandwich. Nonetheless, the show went on as he brushed the crumbs from his chest and salvaged the important parts. " Nothin less than whatcha deserve, Val. M'glad fa ya both ~ " He smiled sweetly, genuinely. Their love was contagious. " Ya gotta date set fa the I Do's? "

Alastor

Oh, "workmanship"? He didn't just grab one from the jewelry store? (Well, no, of course he wouldn't.) Alastor leans forward to look too. "I was starting to worry you two were going to get to the wedding and realize you'd forgotten a ring." In truth, he half suspected they were going to get to the wedding and realize they'd forgotten to propose entirely. "Why an eel—it's what you get when you cross a fish with a snake?"

Valera

Valera beams back at her friend, smugness forgotten in the face of such a sweet display. Who could be anything less than ecstatic at a time like this?  "Thank you, Angel Dust. No date set yet, but we'll get there."

Alastor could joke, but it had been a real possibility with these two. She snorts, turning her hand to admire the way the ring sparkled. "I wouldn't have put it past us. We nearly _did_. But yes, a nice symbolic cross between us. Penny has a ring too, he just keeps it in his pocket."

Pausing as an idea comes to mind, she grins even wider, reaching out to pat at Angel's hand. "Hey, hey. Be my babe of honor. You wanted to help me plan anyway, might as well get the fancy title. "

Sir Pentious

Oh! That reminded him. Babe of honor... Hmm. Sir Pentious turned his head right over to Alastor, that enormous C smile over most of his face! He leans over on the armrest of the couch, chin resting on the backs of his fingers as he flicks his tongue at the deerman.  Hello~

Angel

Oh how WIDE his eyes BLEW. His jaw dropped but he was speechless. Dramatically, his eyes darted. His throat produced demonic giggles of glee behind clasped hands. Had Angel really been given the opportunity to play such a vital part of what was touted as one of the most important days of one's life? She was right, yes, he had already pitched the assistance. Though he hadn't told anyone or made his presence known, he HAD been browsing their fashion tag ( for reasons undefined but browsing nonetheless. )

When he finally gathered his graces, he grabbed Valera's hand in all four of his and excitedly bounced as much as the muscular tail around his waist would let him.

" OH FUCKIN' HELL YEAH GIVE IT TA ME!! " Angel exclaimed, " If THAT ain't the highest fuckin' honor a BITCH could HAVE! "

Suddenly, he had to be free. He had to wiggle. His arms reached for her, fluff and hips vibrating at a higher frequency than the naked eye could track. Grabby GRABBY. He had to join the newlywed pile and SQUISH her.

Alastor

He watches the exchange between Valera and Angel with quiet surprise, before scooting back into his chair a little and pulling the cane rifle onto his lap to give the vibrating pile of limbs more room to excitedly wiggle around. Are they that close? But they hardly know each other, don't they? Does Valera have so few friends to call upon to perform such an important wedding function? Or maybe Alastor's mistaken—he's only been aware of their familiarity with each other for a few weeks, but then again he's also only been tuned into the same band of the internet as them for a few weeks—perhaps they've been acquainted much longer and simply hadn't brought it up...

... He is being Looked At by Sir Pentious. Alastor meets his gaze questioningly. "Yes?"

Valera

The response is both immediate and everything Val could have hoped for. They wiggle their fins as Angel starts vibrating, the excitement nearly palpable and highly infectious as he clasps her hand in his own. "Wouldn't settle for anything less than the best, babe. I know you'll be *amazing*."

Oh that spider is a WIGGLIN', and good for him! He's freed in moments, and before she can blink Valera is lovingly squished by a pink and white pile of vibrating fluff. They loop their arms around Angel in turn, nuzzling their nose against his cheek with a girlish giggle. Oh wow, that chest fluff really IS as soft as it looks, they could cuddle into that *forever*. But alas, their stomach doesn't really appreciate this kind of squishing nonsense, making its disapproval known with an unpleasant churn that leaves Valera wincing. But fuck that, they're going to cuddle this fuzzy spider _anyway_.

Sir Pentious

Oh shit Angel is suddenly cuddling up on Valera--Sir Pentious' head whips back around to watch with a bit of an indignant pout--but. He had to just *remind* himself that there was no way that Angel would be interested in her that way. This was... friendly cuddling? He and Alastor had lied on each other before, just not this. Aggressively. Sir Pentious was rather certain he would *crush* the deerman under his weight should he attempt something like that.

Back to Alastor--Sir Pentious resumes his charming little pose, "I WASS THINKING... YOU COULD BE MY BESSST MAN!" He didn't really... have any friends, after all. Alastor was one of the few people he knew that really wanted to be around him, and actively enjoyed his presence, and Pentious enjoyed his as well. Platonically, this was the nicest little arrangement he'd had in *years*.

"THAT ISS, IF WEDDINGSS ARE YOUR THING."

Angel

How he loved this fucking fish. Angel couldn't remember the last time he felt so happy for someone else. Valera's wedding. His system full of eggs. The bright future they'd surely have. He could cry. Tears beading from all eight corners, his heightened sensitivity caught on and cut his celebration short. In fact, it hit him like a TRUCK. He was covered in hypersensitive hairs. Sensitive enough to convey SYMPATHY PAINS.

" Oh, fuck, Val, you...? " Angel tuned in. Those weren't nice sounds. He was too close to see his face but he was nonetheless worried. " You ok? Ya ain't soundin' good in there, Babes... " He ceased to let go, but his excitedly suffocating hold turned to more of one carefully beholding glass. Soothing fingers raked their hair, smoothed over scales. A hand even dropped to their stomach to venture a possible feel of the movement. Angel bit his lip, heart beginning to pound through his dense volume of fluff. " ... Snacks not agreein' wit' ya...? Want me t' getcha some water? "

Alastor

Really? Him? HIM? Are they that close? But they hardly know each other, don't they? Does Sir Pentious have so few friends... oh, yeah, he probably does. Who else would be able to do it? Two eggs standing on each other?

Can Alastor go through with it? Can he stand just a few feet away, close enough to touch Sir Pentious as he recites his vows, and watch?

A broad, exuberant smile crosses his face as his heart plummets into his stomach. "Why—my good sir, it would be the greatest honor! And here I thought I was going to have to sneak into the back and steal a slice of wedding cake when no one was looking! I'd come give you a hug too, but the sofa is..." he glances over as Angel starts fussing over Valera, "... looking a little... cramped."

Valera

Valera chuckles, a hint of nerves creeping into their voice as they loosen their grip on Angel and sit up. Their hands rest on Angel's shoulders now, more for support than to keep him close. "Oh don't let us stop you, Alastor." Deep breath. It was probably nothing, they're fine. A gentle squeeze, and they drop their hands down to pat their stomach. Behave, damn you. "Yes, some water sounds good, if you wouldn't mind!"

They're fine. This is fine. They're even smiling! It's a queasy smile, but hey! Points for trying.

Sir Pentious

Oh! Alastor said yes! Nevermind Valera suffering right next to him, Sir Pentious is beaming--all teeth! And those excited half moon eyes. He's looking absolutely delighted. He reaches a hand out to take one of Alastor's, squeezing it with glee, "GOOD, *GOOD!* A MAN I CAN TRUSSSST BY MY SSSIDE. YESSS, INDEED. IT WILL BE--"

His head whips backwards, and he looks to Valera with deep concern, "MY DEAR???" That deep breath, and the fact that Angel was talking to her like that... C o n c e r n . "ARE YOU IN PAIN?"

Angel

He knew that face too well. Gently clasping the sides of their face, Angel glanced to Alastor in a vaguely implicit plea to get the water for him. " Ya look like ya gonna pass out... " He then looked at Penny. Did he know what to do when Valera felt sick? ' In sickness and in health ' and all that jazz...?

But he looked just as confused. What did Alastor know? What did HE know?? If it had been one of his girls in the club he'd immediately flip on his professional switch and handle the situation with three hands tied behind his back.

But THIS was VALERA.

" ... Water ain't gonna be fixin' that, Sweets, uh... " Panic - rimmed eyes looked to Penny and Alastor as he shifted and braced himself to handle more of their weight. _What do we DO?!_

Alastor

And regardless of what Valera says, THAT'S why now is not the appropriate time for him to fling himself all over Sir Pentious. (That, plus, the witnesses.)

He's keeping the hand though. He figures he's about to lose access to it.

Everyone else is already fussing over Valera, no need for Alastor to pile on and give them one more question they have to reply to. He nods slightly at Angel's look, cheerily says, "Brace yourselves!" before opening a portal in the air next to him and watching in mild interest as a dozen booze bottles from the bar downstairs fall through and crash on the ground. He fishes out a plastic water bottle that survived the fall from among the glass shards and offers it to Angel to pass to Valera.

Valera

Oh, well! That sure was a lot of loud breaking glass and a LOT of alcohol hitting the air at once, what a _stench_. In an interesting maneuver, Valera manages to both flinch away and gag at the same time, fins flat to their head as they huddle against Angel's chest and eke out a low whine from their throat. Not a dignified look, really. Lets pretend that didn't happen.

A shake of their head and they pull back, pupils blown wide and smile turned to something of a grimace. "Well if I wasn't in pain *before* I sure am *now*. Cheers, loves." They'll be taking that (slippery with alcohol) water bottle now, thank you. Not a snatch, not from Angel, but they're determined to chug the entire thing down. As fish do. "If what I think is happening is happening? Uh. Fuck." Another wince, and they try again. "I'll be fine, this'll be over in like. Five minutes, I'll probably swear a lot, and then we can all relax. No worries." See? It's all good, no need to fret you poor idiots.

Sir Pentious

--NOW HOLD ON JUST A FUCKING MINUTE!!

There was A LOT HAPPENING! First, Alastor opens a portal and the floor to his room is POSITIVELY RUINED with alcohol and broken glass! The LOUD NOISE, the STENCH-- his hood FLOOPS open and he pulls his hand away from Alastor only to *snarl* at the deerman, "WHAT ARE YOU *DOING* YOU BLITHERING--" Oh, oh-- oh back to Valera. He's looking her over, fingers flexing as he looks her up and down in sheer *panic.*

Oh no, oh no. Oh no! Is she having her eggs???? His experience with child birth was None Experience, but the way of childbirth in Victorian England was not exactly the most *hopeful* of ventures. These eggs were duds, but it wasn't like that was taking away from Penny's anxiety. What was he supposed to do???? "F-FIVE MINUTESS??? MY LOVE, YOU ARE POSSITIVELY *BURSSSTING*, YOU CANNOT BE SSSERIOUSSS! THERE ARE PLENTY OF WORRIESSSS TO BE H-HAD!"

Oh, he's looking pale. Local snake is starting to shake! He can't sweat, so instead he'll just grab the brim of his hat and pull it down in panic!

Angel

Bursting? Uh... O h . Penny's panic dissuaded his own and the pieces started coming together. If The Father was going to be preoccupied and The Best Man was probably going to be NEEDED, it was up to him. It had to be up to him. Planting a soft kiss onto Valera's crown, he cradled their head into his chest and released his tertiary set of arms. This was going to take a LOT of care and a LOT of power.

Angel took a few moments to concentrate, maneuvering his hands about Valera's body to gauge both where her weight was distributed and where she was tender. He then stook out a leg and straightened his back as they were lifted into his many arms, cradled to the best of his ability.

" I'm takin' 'em t' the en suite, " Angel announced as he maneuvered himself and his precious bundle of eggnant fish around the mess, " Um, you two... " He appeared to be struggling much more with his words as opposed to the way he seemed to be breaking all laws of physics. A spindly form such as his shouldn't be able to support such a concentrated mass of raw muscle, right? Especially not one filled with eggs, RIGHT?

" ... Come help when ya can... " Angel didn't intend to be rude or condenscending, but his mouth failed where the sincerity of his eyes attempted to fill before he turned on his heels and made his way.

Alastor

Static hisses quietly around him in alarm as Sir Pentious pulls away. Ow. He probably deserved that, he startled the room more than he'd expected. "In retrospect, I could have been a little less expedient." It's almost an apology.

Damage control. He dropped the mess in a place where it wouldn't NEED to be maneuvered around—he was overly generous in his estimation of everyone else's tolerance for sudden noises, that didn't mean he hadn't put ANY thought into his actions—but even so, he's gonna briefly open a second portal under the pile of broken glass. It doesn't un-soak the carpet, but now the bottles are Husk's problem. Alastor can clean the carpet later, right now he's sure that's a distant second on everyone's list of concerns.

He stands and puts a hand on Sir Pentious's shoulder—he'll risk Sir Pentious's wrath when he clearly needs somebody grounding him. "Steady. Their quantity means they're small and their shape means they're aerodynamic, they"—he narrowly suppresses the urge to say *they'll slip right out*—"have no risk of causing complications." He hasn't a damn clue  if that's true. But he sure sounds like he does. "And we've got magic to help ease the process, haven't we?"

Honestly, in his heart of hearts, he doubts Valera needs anything but to be given a little polite distance by the pair of half-panicked busybodies fussing over them. But if it will calm everyone down enough to let Valera to get through their five minute ordeal without having to manage everyone ELSE'S distress as well, then Alastor had better help more directly. His lower body is already turned toward the bathroom door as he prepares to go see what he can do—but not until he's sure that leaving won't mean turning his back on Sir Pentious during a building panic attack. Either Alastor's got to stabilize him or he's got to make sure that Sir Pentious is going to come along to have his panic attack in the bathroom.

Valera

Bless Angel Dust and all the brain cells he seems to have stolen from the rest of the party. Valera is more than happy to curl up and let him carry her to the en suite, purring softly to self soothe as much as try to comfort her spindly rescuer.

"Bathtub should work." There's the fake casual tone again, but it was better than being hysterical right now. If it was only going to be her and Angel here for this, best to make sure it went smoothly. Which meant taking his sudden competence and rolling with it. "Drop me in, and uh. I don't know, hold my hand?"

Sir Pentious

OooOoohh dear. Alastor's hand is on his shoulder, and Pentious has only just watched Angel carry away his wife. Pentious places a hand to his mouth, listening to Alastor attempt to reassure him with the.... *autonomy* of the situation. He pales further, looking a little ill.

His tongue is hanging out of his mouth in the most pathetic fashion, and he looks towards the en suite, going on quite the face journey. He should be there, but he couldn't *move*, it was like being tied to a dead weight!

*Foolish, stupid old man. Failing your wife again?* Oh no this was a TERRIBLE time for panicked thoughts. His hand grips Alastor's once more, and his mind races as he just looks like he might die!

Angel

" I ain't gonna DROP ya, tesoro ~ " he cooed as he gently lowered them and got lucky with the first cabinet he opened. Without leaving her side, he folded a towel over the edge for her head. " I dunno if ya done this before, but I sure haven't so... "

Angel knelt before the tub and held Valera's hands, dipping the bottom half of his face below the brim as four pairs of puppy dog eyes stared at them, brows twisted wtth worry. " D'ya... want the warm water fa the cramps...? Eggs can't drown, right? "

Alastor

Well, THAT didn’t help. So much for the appeal to logos. Shoot for pathos instead, he supposes.

Alastor lowers his voice. “Listen.” He squeezes Sir Pentious’s hand reassuringly. “Valera’s going to be just fine. I promise you. But I bet she’ll feel better about the whole thing if she has her genius, notorious fiancé at her side.” He nods toward the door encouragingly. “Don’t you think?”

If he thought it would help, he’d pull Sir Pentious into a hug and hold him tight, until whatever’s in his head putting those horrible expressions on his face is gone. But he doubts anything but Sir Pentious’s fiancée can help. So he has to just, sort of, try to telepathically transmit a hug through hand-holding.

Valera

Good thinking, Angel. All Valera's research and prep kind of flew out the window as soon as the situation got real. She settles back, sighing in relief as her hand curls tight around his. "Thanks, babe." She turns her head, flashing him the cheekiest wink she can muster up. "Don't worry, fish are remarkably hard to drown. Water sounds great. Think it'll be us two, or are the two old timers going to show up and make this a _real_ party?"

Sir Pentious

Telepathic hug...

Sir Pentious' eyes widen, his talons tapping against Alastor's hand as he's grounding himself with the other's voice. Genius, *notorious* fiance! Oh, yes... Yes! He SHOULD be there!! Sir Pentious sits up, quite suddenly, and turns his head to Alastor.

"YESSS, YOU'RE RIGHT! YESSS. I SHOULD BE THERE... I CANNOT HAVE THAT SSSPIDER SHOW ME UP!!! I..." Urp. "I WILL! HANDLE THISS!! AS I SHOULD!"

And... he slithers off of the couch, adjusting his bowtie as he enters into the en suite, trying not to look like he's about to die.

Angel

_No fucking DUH..._ Angel silently cursed to himself as an extra hand went for the water and tested it for warmth. That was the benefit to being in Hell ; it came out hot and they had to wait for _cold._

" I dunno, " he sighed, " Pen was lookin' pretty shaken up. He might need a minute or two t'- oh! Speak a the serpentine devil ~ ! " Exasperation turned to relief as he scooted to make way to Valera on his knees. " You ok t' take over fa me? " he said with a respectful offering of his fiancé's hands.

Alastor

Success! Alastor keeps his grip on Sir Pentious's hand as long as he can, but lets him slip free before they reach the en suite. That's for Valera now.

He hovers in the doorway. "Do you need any other assistance, or would I just be adding to the tripping hazards if I came in?" He wouldn't mind coming in—if there's no way he can help, he'd be happy to sit on the toilet lid and provide color commentary—but the room already contains a guy with six arms and a fifteen-foot snake, he doesn't really need to add to the crowd if he's not going to be productive.

Valera

Oh, speak of the devil indeed! Valera grins up at Pentious, in far better spirits now that she's in nice warm water and laying back. Infinitely better than trying to sit on a couch while her body tried to act up. It was unfortunate that her pretty silk nightgown was getting just short of boiled, but ah well. Sacrifices must be made and all that.

Oh, and Alastor too? Goodness, she really did know how to summon them. Another wince, and then she clears her throat and pipes up, overly cheery again. "Unless you've got a nice strip of leather that might survive my teeth gnawing on it, I don't know!"

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious makes his way forward, flicking his tongue in long stretches, *clearly* stressed out with his crazy eyes... but he hunkers down by the tub so that he can grasp Valera's hands in his, and stare into her eyes. Was he looking handsome right now? Absolutely not, but he had to be here! He must! For his wife's sake. And... not. Think about the eggs, and. Urp. Oh, he is paling. Keep the smelling salts on hand,,

"ALASSSTOR." Sir Pentious turns his head round, backwards, "DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE THISSSS ROOM!"

Angel

" Yeah, Al, c'mere. " With a grunt, Angel pushed off his knees and braced himself against the edge of the tub near the running faucet. If not for how _tensely_ he taut his muscles in the high stress of the moment, being on his knees would've felt as natural as laying down...

... but this wasn't about _his_ pain.

" Think they're gonna need ya... " he said assertively with a fish ( pun not intended ) through his fluff for a pen of waterproof liner. " Ya think ya can cash in a favor wit' ya friend Prince, uh... " He couldn't help a nervous snicker as he held it out and ushered Alastor forward. " _Demon's epidurals?_ Whatever it takes, I'll make up fa it. "

Could he compare labor to being shot? Maybe being shot in the DICK, but if that sigil was powerful enough for him to be poked and prodded through with close to no pain at all? Valera deserved that level of relief. He wanted that for him more than anything right about now.

Alastor

"I won't, I'm not leaving." He picks his way around Sir Pentious's tail to stand next to him and squeeze his shoulder again. See? Right here, not going anywhere.

He takes the liner, glances over Valera's body thoughtfully, then says, "I can give you a magical painkiller, but it involves drawing an infernal prince's sigil directly on your skin as close to the point of greatest pain as possible. Do you have any objections to any part of that process? If you DO, I have other painkillers, but they're slower."

Valera

Valera scoots to the edge of the tub, both hands wrapped around Pentious' to try and comfort him with gentle squeezes. "I'll be fine, love. But if this is too much, I won't be upset if you need to leave." Mwah, a kiss for the back of his hand.

Oh, hm. Interesting proposal there, pain relief does sound rather tempting with the way her body is feeling. "If we had more than, at my guess, ten minutes before this was over, I'd consider alternatives. But what's a little infernal magic between friends?" Better to feel hungover later than break Pentious' hand now! Hit her with your best personal space invasion, Alastor.

Sir Pentious

The talk of painkillers is kind of going over Sir Pentious' head. It's not like they didn't exist back when he was alive, but he was more fixated on trying to keep his stomach contents inside of his body, and not faint on the spot, also. Alastor's hand on his shoulder, as well as Valera's hands on his was *very* comforting, and he just kind of sat there, looking stricken with concern.

"HOW-- *INVASSSSIVE* WILL THISSS SSSSSIGIL BE???"

Angel

" He ain't gonna be shovin' it up 'is VAGINA or anythin'! " Angel proclaimed with a twist and drag of his neckline to reveal his bandage, " Just aroun' the top, like he did me 'ere... " He then circled a claw around the spot where his wound was healing. _Modesty ain't the goal here, Penny, c'mon ~_ he mused silently, instead urging the snake prioritize better with his Look. He also reached down to give a section of Penny's tail a gentle pat. Physical reassurance seemed to be doing... something for them both. " It works wonders. _Trust us ~ "_

Alastor

"It was up top for YOU, Angel, because your INJURY was up top. For Valera, in order for me to get as close to the point of the pain as possible—well, truth be told, the only downside to trying to shove it up the aforementioned anatomy is the fact that I wouldn't be able to draw like that! As it is," he nods to Valera, "if you'd be so good as to expose a bit of skin somewhere abdominal where I can draw, please. At least as much surface area as the palm of your hand, as close as you can get to the point of maximum pain."

Valera

Another little squeeze for Pentious' hand, this poor fool looked like he was about to keel over, and then Valera pulls her hands free. Unfortunately, they were needed elsewhere.

"Alastor, as much as I trust your unwavering capacity for professionalism, I think I'll pass on the infernal fisting, for both of our sakes." A snort, and she unbuttons over her stomach, scooting back to make sure it was above the water's surface. Angel's eyeliner was good, but she doubted it was _that_ good. "Have at it, but you may need to towel the area off to get better traction. Fish are slippery and all that."

Sir Pentious

His hood FLOOMPS out with indignant fury at being spoken to that way by Angel, and he moves his tail away from the other!!

"DO NOT TOUCH Me, YOU-" Wait, where. Oh no.

Sir Pentious is going to sit on himself, hands clasped together on his lap and just. Scream internally as he would have to watch Alastor touch his fiancée in such.

Specific places. The talk of slippery and needing better traction as him swallow hard, trying not to think about the fact he was *in the birthing chambers oh God oh God oh God he feels like he's unlocked some long buried repressed memories.*

Sit neatly, Penny. No need for fuss.

Angel

Angel sighed and drained some of the water. That couldn't be a bad call, right? He also reached to revisit the cabinet from prior for another towel. A second one. He gave them both to Valera.

" Here... one fa dryin' and another if ya wanna... cover up, " he mumbled, eyes darting around the room for anything else he could do to try and settle the atmosphere.

Coming up empty, he shifted back towards the faucet to give Alastor some space. He could touch _her_ tail, right? An ankle? Angel leaned back. He'd be at the ready where he was guaranteed to be needed.

Alastor

"Infernal fss—!" Hold on while Alastor's studio audience cracks up. "Hah, no! I don't have the right manicure for that, do I!"

Alastor waits until Valera has toweled a patch of skin dry, then perches on the edge of the tub, leans across it to brace one elbow on the opposite side, and hastily scrawls out Prince Gaap's sigil. He doesn't straighten up until it's started to glow. "There! Instant painkiller—and partial invulnerability to injury as well. You can take a stab or two but don't climb into any trash compactors."

He offers the liner to Angel and squeezes Sir Pentious's shoulder again. There, not so bad, is it? Alastor didn't even have to touch Valera, it was all the liner.

Valera

"Just so, my dear fellow! Maybe next time." She doesn't have a good angle to really study the sigil, but she cranes her head down to take a look, fins flaring in surprise. "Oh! Gaap, huh? How fitting, this sort of thing is just up his alley."

Instant relief! She could _kiss_ the radio man. But she'll settle for laying back again, fixing her position and getting comfortable. Just in time, it'd been getting pretty hard to keep up appearances.

Sir Pentious

Very prickly snake man may have to apologize to Angel Dust later, for being so thankless. This was the primary reason Pentious had so few friends.

He's just watching Valera now, focused on her and reaching out for her hand.

Angel

With a deep sigh of relief, Angel put his liner away and busied himself with fussing over the tap. Particularly the chain connecting the handle to the plug. It was so entertaining. Was he being too loud and obnoxious, jingling and making faces at the thing to manually steer himself from further upsetting Penny? _Perhaps._ But now that Valera was comfortable at long last, the remainder of his nervous energy had go go _somewhere._

Alastor

"Oh, do you know him!" He perks up. "Where did you meet?! We haven't been narrowly missing each other at big parties for the past decade, have we? Say, if I..."

He trails off as he remembers what, exactly, they're in the middle of.

Then he cheerily adds, "Maybe we'll exchange Gaap gossip later."

Valera

She offers a slightly strained smile, but keeps her tone light. "Later, yes. We'll have lunch, make a day of it. It'll be fun." Deep breath, this is it lads.

The actual laying process is, at least on Valera's end, largely uneventful and over with in a few minutes of undignified grimacing and shifting in place. There's a brief stab of dulled pain as the process begins in earnest, but with the combination of adrenaline and magic, she barely feels a thing beyond 'vague discomfort'. Thanks, Alastor.

Three pristine white orbs, roughly the size of ostrich eggs, with soft, leathery shells. The proud (?) Mother sits up, taking a moment to catch her breath before she nudges them out of her robe. She lifts and inspects each egg in turn, turning them this way and that, then drops them back into the water and drapes herself over the edge of the tub, looking quite pleased with herself. "Sturdy shells, healthy sizes and weights. For all intents and purposes, picture perfect eggs. Damn I'm good." Thumbs up for the audience.

Sir Pentious

What was the great Sir Pentious doing for most of this? Trying to not throw up, actually. He kind of looks more like a White Snake right now, swaying a little from side to side... once he sees those eggs? And the thought that they came from inside of her? Oh, and also, the various faces she made before?

Sploosh. He just *fainted*, with his head RIGHT into the tub.

Angel

Valera's making faces... VALERA'S MAKING FACES! At the sound of her beginning grunting, Angel promptly turned from his stimming and leaned towards her from a respectful distance, all four hands clenching the edge of the tub for dear life. For a moment he worried the sigil wasn't working, or was somehow rubbing off in the water. He was a FOOL. His liner wasn't designed for scales. WHAT WERE THEY GOING TO DO-?!

If his face wasn't already stark as a sheet, his fleeing soul took the rest of his pigment from his body upon reaizing he wasn't squeezing just the tub. Sometime during their labor, he'd crept closer and closer and found himself squeezing the living daylights out of Alastor's arm. Angel flailed his arms away as quickly as he realized, but not fast enough to escape THE SPLASH.

All his glorious volume. GONE.

He hugged the rim of the tub right next to Valera to shield himself, just to find himself close enough to the eggs to see their texture. The size of his eyes mirrored their diameter. A BABY could come out of those... They'd need care... protection... guidance... The rest of the en suite felt silent as a void save for the turn of his head towards Valera. Back to the eggs. And to him again. Angel shrunk.

" C... " he struggled, " Can... I hold 'em...? "

Alastor

Initially, Alastor's content (more or less) to remain sitting on the edge of the tub, gaze pointed politely at the ceiling to allow Valera a modicum of dignity.

Which means he’s unalert when SOMEBODY grabs his arm. He beeps out a startled *di-di-dah-dah-di-dit* and shoots Angel a look. Under the circumstances, he’ll let it slide. Considering that Alastor’s the only person in the room who isn’t emotionally compromised, he must look a pillar of reassuring stability, mustn’t he?

When Sir Pentious faints, Alastor elects to share some of that stability, slithers down to the floor, pulls Sir Pentious from the tub, and holds him upright. That's a totally normal friend thing to do, right? Supporting a pal? Helping a homey? Embracing a buddy? Tenderly cradling a comrade in your loving arms? Oh so softly humming a sweet melody to sooth an unconscious amigo? Affectionately allowing a friendaroonie to rest his head upon your shoulder—

Oh, is the show over? Alastor glances into the tub, offers a round of applause from the studio audience, and dryly says, "Well done."

All that fuss for so little. Considering the meager help they provided and the eggs’ infertility, they were less three midwives assisting in a birth and more three gawkers watching somebody shit out an unusually large constipated turd. Alastor should have handed Valera a water bottle, administered a painkiller, and left—and he faintly resents the other two for trapping him in this rude intrusion.

But, well. He's here now. Arms available to all who need support, apparently.

Valera

Sparing a bemused look at Alastor holding up Pentious' unconscious pasta noodle of a corpse, Valera scoops one of the eggs out of the water and offers it out to Angel. "I think the father is usually supposed to hold the results of his efforts first, but seeing as my poor beau wants to play the part of Alastor's fashionable new accessory? You may have the honor."

A snort as she hands the egg off, and she flicks a few drops of water onto Penny's face. "Rise and shine, Sir Pentious. The ordeal is over, wake up before Alastor decides to start eating your children like some kind of opportunistic mongoose."

Sir Pentious

The flecks of water kind of don't do much for him at the moment, since he did end up getting an entire *faceful* of water not that long ago. Maybe smelling salts or something would do the trick!

Angel

If Angel's eyes got any bigger, they'd surpass the borders of his face. An EGG. He was holding AN EGG. His dead demon heart aflutter, he could not contain the way he vibrated. He even forgot how self conscious he would've been in the moment to be sporting a damp, flattened chest.

Gently smoothing his thumbs over the soft, leathery surface, he moved to kneel before the cuddling comrades, affectionate amigos, bosom buddies. " Hey, Pen, buddy... " Angel had no smelling salts on hand, but he attempted to call the snake's attention as he carefully held the egg out to him, ready to retract like LIGHTNING if he so happened to get startled. " It's ya happy lil' mistake ~ Val's wantin' ya t' hold 'em ~ "

He sang and smiled brightly to fruitless avail. Not wanting to risk crossing Penny's boundaries again, he looked to Alastor. " Your turn. Smack 'im, or somethin'. He's more t' forgive you fa that than me, " Angel suggested with a snicker.

Alastor

"I would never," Alastor says, as if the very suggestion was unimaginable. "They're YOUR eggs, OBVIOUSLY the mother and father should have the first opportunity to eat them! I was even going to offer to fry them up for you." What kind of a guest do they take him for, honestly.

"I'm not smacking him. Hold on, I've got some salt of hartshorn." As much as he'd like to continue cuddling his chum, he supposes it's going to look weird if he doesn't help. He opens a small portal—AWAY from Angel—and rummages through it until he withdraws a package of smelling salts. There, sniff that. Wakey wakey.

Valera

"I appreciate the thoughtfulness, Alastor! How did you know I was absolutely starved?"

A snort, and Val drags more of herself out of the tub, upper torso hanging over the edge as she watches the scene. She's never seen someone react to smelling salts before!

Sir Pentious

Well, that whiff was definitely enough to get his eyes fluttering open, and his face *wrinkling* at the scent.

"UGH--WHAT... WHAT?" He was all wet, and he hated that a great deal, and he was being held in Alastor's arms. Hm. Sir Pentious' head swivels to and fro, and he looks to Valera. There's a big smile!

And then he immediately remembers what had happened and pales again, "OH." Feeling foolish, his neck sinks into his collar, "MUSSST EVERYONE SSSTARE AT ME!!!?"

Weh!

Angel

" This lil' thing'd be starin' at ya TOO an' callin' ya DADDY if it 'ad eyes. An' a mouth. " Angel continued presenting the egg in both hands as if it were the most precious thing to exist. He had just the right amount of hands to hold all three as such, but perhaps Penny would gather enough of his graces to fish them out of the tub himself. He agreed with Valera. He should have the honor. ~~But that didn't stop his staring longingly at them from the corner of his eyes.~~ It would take everything in his person to refrain from IMMEDIATELY getting another egg in his hands as soon as Penny relieved him. " C'mon, Pen, say HELLO t' my LIL' FRIEND ~ " he snorted.

Alastor

Alastor loosens his embrace but doesn't quite break it, then politely tips his head back and looks at the ceiling—there, see? Not staring anymore.

"Eyes, a mouth, or an actual life inside it," Alastor mutters wryly, then tips his still-tilted head sideways to roll his eyes to Valera. "I'd bring you some catering from the next room over, but I don't think I've been forgiven yet from the last time I got you a snack."

Valera

Valera watches Pentious' reaction with a snort, then hauls herself up to sit on the edge of the tub and start wringing water out of her poor nightgown. Ugh, wet silk... Ah well, a little magic and it's as flouncy and befluffed with heaps of lace as ever, and now she can properly step out of the tub and join the rest of them on the floor without turning it into a hazard. There, it's a floor party now.

"Perhaps not, Alastor! I suppose I'll survive another hour or so before I start gnawing at anyone's kneecaps." A dramatic sigh, a long stretch, and she settles in to start finger combing her hair. "Angel, honey, I see you eyeing them. It's alright, you can hold them all." A pause, and she scoots over to cuddle up to Angel's side so she can half-murmur to him. "Not sure if Penny dear is up to even looking at them, look how pale he is! My feelings would be hurt if I hadn't expected some level of horror at the process."

Sir Pentious

Feelings *hurt*? Oh no. Usually he wouldn't care but this was Valera, his love, his light. There's a big frown as he looks at one of the eggs.

It's okay now, don't think about how it came out of her--he reaches a shaking hand toward the egg. Being called daddy by a little eelish child.... His eyes to THE THING as he takes hold of the egg with both hands....

And brings it in close against his chest. There might not be anything inside, but.... The fact there *could* be at a later date, a child between him and Valera....

Oh those big eyes aren't going away.

Angel

He didn't need to be told twice. Soon as he handed off the first egg to Penny, Angel dove back into the tub for the rest and promptly sat back up with them. He must've cleared the tub with how much water he threw, but the widest smile he could muster as he cuddled the two duds didn't care.

" They gotta be WARM though, don't they...? " he pouted first at Valera, then down at his chest. Forget FORM. NOW the famous fluff lost its FUNCTION. " Ya got a blowdrier in 'ere? Just gimme a minute wit' it and I'll be toastin' these babies in NO TIME! "

Alastor

Sir Pentious is taking the egg, does that mean it's safe to look at him again—? Oh. Oh look at that wonder on his face.

Nope. Definitely wasn't safe to look yet. Alastor drags his gaze away.

Now, why does Angel care about keeping the eggs warm? If anything, they ought to be kept cold to keep them from spoiling longer. They'd only need to be warm if something was in them—

Alastor's ear twitch as something in him quietly dings in realization. He turns to catch Valera's eye: *do you want to tell him or shall I?*

Valera

Catching Valera's eye is a bit harder than usual with the way she's watching Pentious go from grossed out to over the moon, but once he has it her eyes flicker between him and Angel. Processing, processing, give her a moment while she sorts through egg brain..

"I don't think we have one in here, actually? Penny doesn't have hair, and I don't need one. We'd have to ask Charlie or Niffty.. it's okay though, they'd be..." Oh wait.

The light turns on, and she nods a _go ahead_ to the cherry red radio man. Time to scoot her way to Pentious and give him a lil peck on the cheek with only A LITTLE hesitation. "Hi honey." A familiar doll manifests in Valera's hands, offered out to the proud father himself. She's still SOMEWHAT worried he might faint again, so. Look! A cute doll, easier to think about that!

Sir Pentious

His eyes are so big, it's amazing that they can do that considering he's not a feline. When he's kissed on the cheek, he looks to Valera, flicking his tongue--oh there's a cute doll!!! He remembers this doll. Going to take the doll too................ COBRA PURR. It sounds very horrifying unless you're in love with Sir Pentious,

Don't mind him, he's off in his own world here. Only barely listening to everyone else.

Angel

Off in his own adjacent world, Angel continued holding and beaming at the eggs like a proud mother of twins. If a drier was out of the question at the moment, he could towel dry. They had plenty of towels. He made a quick makeshift nest for the eggs in the middle of his crossed legs before doing due diligence with his fluff.

Then it dawned at him that he wasn't the only one in the room with hair. Fur. No matter. Fluff was fluff and it included deer fluff.

" Hey, Al. " Angel peeked at him from beneath a towel. " Ya got a drier in that void a yours I could borrow? " he asked as a pair of spare hands tucked in the eggs.

Alastor

Oh he's got a cobra purring against him. Said cobra isn't paying attention to him but it doesn't matter. He's being purred on. Hold on. Give him a second. He's having a moment of euphoria here—

—hold on who's talking to him. "Hm?" For a split second, between having rapidly dumped the prior conversation out of his short-term memory and the deep rumbling that Sir Pentious is putting out, he interprets "drier" as a clothing drier and nearly asks if Angel's planning to scramble the eggs in one. "I'm afraid not!"

Then he leans toward Angel as much as he thinks he can get away with without reminding Sir Pentious of where he's sitting, props his elbow on the rim of the tub and his cheek against his hand, nods toward the carefully-constructed nest, and asks, "Oh, Angel? You ARE aware that those eggs aren't alive, aren't you?"

Valera

Pentious and his horrible cobra purrs, charming two people in existence and nobody else. Valera grins, all set to snuggle into his side until she remembers that there are other people in the room. It's fine, she'll settle for a casual drape over his tail as she tunes back in.

"Oh? Uh, yeah Angel. They've got everything they need in there, but no spark of life to kick them off. I feel like I've mentioned that before?" She cocks her head, looking at Angel and his little nest. "Though if I'd known you'd get so parental over them..." A shrug, and she makes a vague, wiggly fingers motion at the eggs in his lap.

Angel

" You-uh... What? " Angel's brows sloped like a church steeple as he fought with how little to believe his ears. For all he knew, Alastor could be mocking him. His eyes almost narrowed, but rapidly MOISTENED as he took in what Valera had to say. _Guess they were RIGHT and HE was a paternally lovesick FOOL._

" ... No... " he responded solemnly with a pout, " Must a... went over m'head... " Was that a SNIFFLE? Angel was, in fact, sniffling. Whether it'd come to ANYONE'S surprise was up for debate. Either way, he was embarassed. So he twisted towards the tub and buried his face into his arms as the others hugged the nest.

" What a... " SNIFFLE. " We gonna be doin' wit' em', then...? " He popped a daring eye at Alastor. _' Don't say " eat them " , don't say " eat them " , **BRO. YA BETTA NOT SAY " EAT THEM " I SWEAR T' MARY JOSEPH AN' JESUS...!**_ '

Alastor

Alastor wants very very badly to laugh at Angel. Instead he stretches out one hand to Angel’s back. Pat pat.

“That’s entirely up to the parents!” Please say eat them, please say eat them, he’d really like to eat them—

Valera

Oh noooo... Valera reaches out, smiling sympathetically as she pats Angel's knee. Many pats on all sides for this spider, there there. "I know I'm the one who made them and all, but I'm leaving that up to my beau! ..Who's probably still out of it. Hang on." She slaps at Penny's back with her tail, just enough to jostle him.

"Babe! What do you want to do with the eggs? Keep them? Throw them out? Feed them to Alastor? Pretty sure Alastor wants to eat them, he's been joking about it the whole time."

Sir Pentious

Oh and jostled he is. His upper body wiggles in place like a cartoon character, comical woobwoobwoo sound and all!

He makes a *face* at Valera for that, promptly remembers he's holding an egg and a doll, and floomps out his hood--Sorry Alastor. You get a hood to the face. Smells like Sir Pentious though.

"EAT THEM??? THROW THEM OUT?!? NO!!! THEY ARE *MINE* AND NO ONE CAN HAVE THEM!!" And with that, he shoves the egg in his hat. The hat is making something akin to an uwu face.

"ANGEL DUST, GIVE ME THE OTHER EGGS AT O----Are you crying???"

Angel

" NO!! " A muffled Angel yelled from a towel, " I AIN'T CRYIN'! YOUSE THE FATHER! **YOU'RE** CRYIN'! "

Without freeing his face from the towel, his secondary and tertiary hands felt about the nest before carefully offering them off to Penny like the precious gems they were.

" THEY AIN'T ALIVE. REMEMBER?? " SNIFF! " THERE AIN'T! NOTHIN' T' BE CRYIN' ABOUT! " If he were to lift his face from that towel, it'd be covered in dusty pink make up and runny mascara. It's his now. He'll have to grope his way down the halls to his room before giving it up.

Alastor

Alastor’s immediately filled with a horrible mix of rage and terror at Valera’s words—it’s fine when HE talks about eating the eggs because he’s been very careful to phrase it as an OFFER to fry them up should the parents be interested, but if Valera’s words are Sir Pentious’s first introduction to the topic he’s going to think Alastor’s been preparing to snatch them up and dart off to the nearest skillet, and there’s another shard chiseled off of the very slender pillar of trust Alastor’s managed to build up with Sir Pentious—

And before he can start to consider damage control, he gets smacked in the face with a hood. He might have enjoyed the scent if he didn’t suddenly have his nose smashed into his face.

By the time Alastor manages to see around Sir Pentious’s hood, Angel is crying, Sir Pentious looks like he might be on the verge of crying, and Alastor’s not sure what to do but exchange a glance with Valera. All this for a bunch of duds.

Valera

Valera's trying not to laugh, she really is. But the melodrama happening in the bathroom is better than any soap opera she's ever seen, and it's happening live, audience participation mandatory! She grins gleefully at Alastor, all her teeth on display, then schools her expression back to the picture of sympathy as she scoots closer to stroke Angel's hair. There there, get a hug you sad spider.

"Hey, it's okay Angel. You're alright! I might be crying too, if I wasn't deathly averse to being vulnerable." Or if she were particularly emotional at the moment, but she's high on adrenaline and magic, not to mention SUPER hungry.

Sir Pentious

.................. He's gonna take these eggs, thank you. Into his hat they go. And then put his hat back on his head.

Strangely, the hat doesn't seem all that different, and it's also not drooping at all.

... Weird.

SIr Pentious sits back, and looks at Alastor with a *squint*. "WERE YOU GOING TO EAT THEM??? THEY CAME OUT OF MY WIFE, ALASTOR." That's as *Dude* as it gets.

Angel

Angel turned into Valera's chest to hide and try to preserve some dignity. He carefully wiped his face and eyes, intending to do so until no more makeup came off, but Penny yelling at Alastor caught his attention. A reddened eye subtly peeked from the fluff of the towel to catch the next act of drama now that he was off center stage.

Alastor

“*Valera* said I was going to eat them,” Alastor clarified patiently. “*I* said—*after* this initial accusation was made—that if the parents *wanted,* I would be *willing* to cook them up for you. I didn’t broach the topic and once it was broached I didn’t even ask to eat them myself. This is character assassination.”

Valera

The accused fish snorts, no venom in their voice as they lovingly combs their claws through Angel's hair. The gentlest little head scratches. You would accuse them, Alastor? They're over here looking like the next Virgin Mary comforting this weeping wannabe dad, and you accuse them of character assassination? Unbelievable. They'd be offended if they didn't love every second of this. "A vicious attack against the local cannibal, truly. He has a point though, he never said it outright."

They'll leave the implications of that statement up to interpretation, right now they have to nuzzle their face into top of Angel's head and purr for him. See? Much too busy comforting their friend for such things.

Sir Pentious

Sir Pentious blinked, looking from Alastor to Valera before he LAUGHED, putting an arm around Alastor and *bumping* his head to the deerman's.

"CHARACTER ASSSSSASSSSSINATION?? WHY, THAT MUSSSST BE THE ONLY THING THAT CAN KILL YOU IN HELL, MAN! NYA HA HA HAAAAAAA!"

Angel

There's still a bit of blackened smudge around his eyes, but OH is he in _BLISS!_ Instinctively, Angel's cheek chases the rumble of their throat and digs into the bones of Valera's collar for some more of that sweet, _sweet_ sensation. No drama. Just purring ~

Followed by snickering. Alastor's a bit _invested,_ isn't he?

Alastor

Is he ever invested. His eyes fly wide open when Sir Pentious pulls him in to bump, and then slide shut as he leeeans into the touch.

"The Radio Demon's only weakness." He's grinning dumbly, oh, this is so nice. Can he hug back, he's gonna hug back. "When you're as dangerous as I am, the only part of you that can be damaged is your reputation!"

Valera

Valera narrows her eyes, but holds her tongue, ignoring Pentious and Alastor in favor of doting on Angel. Just gonna curl her tail around the spusband and stay in her lane here.

A gentle murmur into that soft fluff. "I'm sorry Angel, if I'd known you were so excited about them being fertile eggs, I could have done something about it! But tell you what. Whenever I have a *real* clutch, I'll let you suggest a name, okay? Not guaranteed to use it, but I'll consider it."

Sir Pentious

It's a good thing that Sir Pentious couldn't see that eye narrowing, or else the mood would have taken a sharp turn into frigid winters. He was completely oblivious to Alastor's true feelings for him, assuming this was all well and good for friends to do. It was acceptable in his day, at least, for male friends to hang out like so and topple over one another. Although, he didn't really have friends of his own to topple with, so... this could be why he was so strange about it.

"AH, YESS! THAT ISS TRUE!! I SSTILL CONSSIDER MYSSSELF A MAN OF REPUTATION, OF A CERTAIN SSSTANDING! ALTHOUGH I DOUBT YOURSSS IS TARNISHED FROM WANTING TO EAT EGGSS. YOU DO EAT *PEOPLE.* IF YOU ARE SSSO SSSTARVED FOR AN OVAL DISH, YOU COULD GRAB ONE OF MINE!!!" A pause, "EGG BOIS. I MEAN EGG BOISS." WHat else would you have meant,

And then his eyes kind of go cross eyed.

"WHY ARE WE ALL SSITTING ON THE FLOOR!?"

Angel

The spider stifled some more GIGGLES when Valera offered him the high honor. TOO high an honor. Not so much because of WHO she was asking, but where the MOBSTER came from and the CUSTOMS they had.

" Oh, no. Babe. _No~_ " Angel earnestly prepared to administer himself a burn. " Have ya EVER heard a the names mafiosi come up wit' fa each other? Ontop a that, I gave M'SELF the name Angel Dust. Ya gonna end up wit' a name like Ecstasy. 'Cause that's what it fuckin'... FELT LIKE thinkin' these bambinos was live... "

He then plastered a playfully shameful hand over his face, sandwiching his head between that and Valera's chest. " Or _Babyface Bobby._ " YEAH. NO. Don't HUMOR HIM.

" Well there's only one seat in 'ere, " Angel joked with a jut of a thumb towards the toilet, " This place ain't made fa an audience, but 'ere we ARE... " He pushed up from Valera just enough to see their face. " Ya doin' ok, Sweets? "

Alastor

"It's not the eating of eggs that would damage my reputation," Alastor said, with an artificial air of great dignity. "It's the suggestion that I would start demanding the infertile offspring of a friend to eat without first waiting to see what said friend wants to do with them! I am not so inconsiderate to my friends!"

His invisible audience laughed at Angel's toilet explanation, and he cheerfully added, "The floor is a perfectly adequate seat!" Then he leaned over to elbow Angel. "If a child can be named Joy or Felicity with no trouble, I don't see any problem with Ecstasy." Look at that shit-eating grin.

Valera

The grin on Val's face is edging towards Maniacally Cheerful as opposed to comforting and maternal, but it's fine. Angel can't be upset if he's busy cracking up like a microwaved egg. The daintiest little gasp, and she places the very tips of her fingers to her cheek.

"But hun, darling, baby, that's exactly what I want! You think any kid unfortunate enough to come out of me is getting a *normal* name? I expect only the FINEST suggestions." A pause to dramatically chef kiss her fingers, and she carries on with gusto. "I'm talking the WORST puns imaginable. Same goes for you, Alastor. Don't let me down."

Sir Pentious

Well now they're all speaking loud enough for Penny to hear them... And he's frowning. Puns??? Of course, he liked a good pun, but. All he could imagine was his beloved future daughter being mocked for having a ridiculous name!

So he begins moving like he's intending to get up, "THE FLOOR ISSS NOT NEARLY AS COMFORTABLE AS THE SSSOFA. I SHALL RETURN THERE! THE LEFTOVER TEA CALLSSSS TO ME." And he swivels his body around, moving to just PICK UP Valera, pulling her into his arms, "ALSO I AM TAKING *MY* WIFE WITH ME." Why does he say that so pointedly. Why are you so aggressive, Penny.

He. Can't fully lift her, but she can ride the Penny Engine out of the bathroom, byeeee.

Angel

In the midst of tossing his head back to LAUGH, Angel bumped his head on the edge of the sink. He only cringed for a second, though, as he all but immediately continued bursting.

" 'AIGHT VAL, I won't let ya down. If ya get yourself another set of triplets, Joy, Felicity, and Ecstacy are contenders. "

He leaned out of the way of the shifting masses of enormous tails, waving off his friend with an imaginary hankie. " Go ahead. I'll clean up all the water and be back after I, uh... dry. " Being seen without his fluff was worse than being seen without makeup. And now the three of them had experienced both.  Angel hid his embarassment best he could with a casual jut of his chin in Alastor's direction.

" Ya need help cleanin' up the bottles, too? "

Alastor

Alastor gets to his feet. Goodness, he’s soaking too. With a flick of one hand he casts the worst of it out of his clothing, leaving himself only slightly damp.

“The glass has already been dealt with.” The glass has already been relocated, at any rate; whether or not it’s been dealt with is up to Husk now. “I can clean up the booze myself!”

He glances around the bathroom, decides he’s been plenty helpful enough already and no need to clean up the water too, and sweeps out to rejoin the party. There’s a whole table of snacks he left behind and he’s starving.

[lovemesomesurveys]

TEN HOW’S:

How did you get one of your scars? Surgery.

How did you celebrate your last birthday? Dinner and a movie with family.

How are you feeling at this moment? Tired and hungry.

How did your night go last night? It was okay.

How did you do in high school? I did well. A’s and B’s.

How did you get the shirt you’re wearing? Hot Topic.

How often do you see your best friend? I see my mom everyday, we live together. How much money did you spend last month? That was Christmastime... I don’t even wanna add it all up. How old do you want to be when you get married? I don’t plan on ever getting married.

How old will you be at your next birthday? 30.  D’:

NINE WHAT’S:

Your mothers name? I don’t want to give that out.

What did you do last weekend? Nothing.

What is the most important part of your life? My family. What would you rather be doing? I should be sleeping. What did you last cry over? stress. unhappiness. <<<<

What always makes you feel better when you’re upset? ASMR or sleep.

What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other? I just would like someone patient, understanding, and kind with a good sense of humor. What are you worried about? Health stuff. What did you have for breakfast? I’m going to have some oatmeal soon, actually. EIGHT HAVE YOU’S:

Have you ever liked someone who had a girlfriend/boyfriend? Just little crushes in high school, nothing serious that I was going to pursue or anything. Have you ever had your heartbroken? Yes. Have you ever been out of the country? Once. Have you ever done something outrageously dumb? Haaaaaaa. Too many things. Have you ever been back stabbed by a friend? Yes. Have you ever had sex on the beach? Nope. Not the drink or the real thing. Have you ever read an entire book in one day? Many times. SEVEN WHO’S:

Who was the last person you saw? My brother.

Who was the last person you texted? My mom. Who was the last person you hungout with? Mom. Who was the last person to call you? Mom again. Who did you last hug? Take a guess... ^^^ Who is the last person who texted you? My Nana. Who was the last person you said “i love you” to? My doggo. SIX WHERE?S:

Where does your best friend live? Here in the same house. Where did you last go? Walmart. Where did you last hang out? Walmart? ha. That’s about as much as I do besides doctor appointments. Where do you go to school? I’m  d o n e  with school. Where is your favorite place to be? My bed. Where did you sleep last night? Here in bed. FIVE DO’S/DOES:

Do you like someone right now? Not in the romantic sense, no. Do you think anyone likes you? Not in that way. Do you ever wish you were someone else? I have wished that. Honestly; though, I’d just like to be a healthier and better version of myself. Do you know the muffin man? Yep. Makes great banana (without the nut) muffins. Does the future scare you? Extremely. FOUR WHY’S:

Why are you best friends with your best friend(s)? We just have a close bond and she’s the one who has always been there for me and has been my rock and biggest supporter. I couldn’t do it without her.

Why did you get a myspace? Back when I got one it was like the cool, new thing and I had to check it out.

Why did your parents give you the name you have? They liked it.

Why are you doing this survey? Just because. THREE IF’S:

If you could have one super power what would it be? Teleportation. If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you? Oh man. So many things I’d like to change... If u were stranded on a deserted island & could bring one thing what would you bring? If I had phone that had good reception then I’d be okay cause I’d call for help and could be tracked. TWO WOULD-YOU-EVER’S:

Would you ever get back together with any of your ex’s if they asked you? No. Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love? If I could save them? Absolutely I would. No questions asked. ONE LAST QUESTION

Are you happy with your life right now? No.

[followerofmercy]

@unexpected-profundity tagged me for 20 questions :D

I would like to tag @trifoyle and @vass-rieh, if you guys want to

1. Nickname

I tend to just respond to whatever people yell in my direction, so I go by Reagan and Morgan semi-frequently. I also love the really friggen weird ones that have nothing to do with my actual name, like Crystal, Storm and Ms. Albright. (Mr. Albright was a teacher that recently retired, and as far as I’m aware, did not have a wife or children).   I also respond to “hey you,” “NERD,” “lady,” etc, and went by Dragon when I had my old username.

2. Gender

F

3. Meyers-Briggs

INFP HELL YEAH. However, I’m only like... 3% more introverted than extroverted. I can do both and it is extremely helpful. 

4. Height

5′5″

5. Favorite features

I’m assuming physical features, so my hair and skin tone. I’m white AF with friggen anime-length brown hair. Seriously, my hair is loooong. I colored it a few months ago to give it a reddish undertone and darken it a few shades. (I can also wear anything except white or flesh tones, which is nice)

6. Favorite color

Red and gray! Red is so powerful and symbolic, blood and love and rage, etc, while gray is subtle and you can do so, so much with it. I love the sheer amount of color on overcast days, all the different blue-grays in the clouds. It’s only dreary if you don’t know what to look for. 

7. Favorite animal

Uhhhhhh. Hard to pick? Tossup between cuttlefish, elephant and giraffe, leaning towards cuttlefish. Soft genius bois. 

8. Average hours spent sleeping

At current work or at college, 6-8 hours. When on vacation, 8-10. I get kinda lethargic on vacations. I don’t like it.

9. Dogs or cats

Dogs are superior work animals, cats make better pets. They’re better at entertaining themselves when I’m busy. 

10. Morning or evening person? 

Hard to say? I think I define this differently than most people. I consider “morning people” people that can function right out of bed - they don’t need an hour to “wake up,” and I fall in that category. Once I’m up, I’m up and moving (makes me great for jobs where I’m on-call during sleeping hours - like my current job). However, I vastly prefer being awake later in the day and I hit a second wind at night without fail. 

11. Dream trip?

Piranha fishing in the Amazon, checkin’ out bugs and fungi in Australia, or fishing in Alaska. 

12. Dream job?

Something meaningful? I’m trying to get in with a prison ministry organization stationed around here, though apparently I love kids? I honestly didn’t expect that? This camp counselor thing is great. ANYWAY. I want something where I make a difference to people, ideally working with individuals, and maybe where my science background is relevant. (OH I LOVE COOKING - I also really want to open a candy shop. Currently working on that with my mother.)

13. When did you make this account?

Uh. Dunno? Sometime? And like unexpected-profundity said, I have no issue with people digging all the way back into my posts. I don’t think that’s creepy at all. This is an archive of things I choose to share, not my diary. 

14. How many followers do you have?

HOLY POOP WHEN DID I GET 49?! Uhhhh hi and thanks. I also have an askblog for my original story @askwordsworthconsolas but I have done literally nothing with it yet. Gonna reblog all the oc asks I do over there eventually. Someday. 

15. How many pets do you have?

My dad has a dog, I have a cat and five chickens, as well as innumerable fish in our koi pond/self-sustaining ecosystem thing. When I live somewhere that allows pets, I get random toads or lizards from the wild, let them chill out in my terrarium for a week until I get bored of them, then return them to the wild. I hatched some eggs from an anole once. 

16. Best place to visit in your country?

I highly recommend the Great Lakes, specifically Lake Huron. Beautiful, dangerous expanse of water, lots of fish. 

17.  Favorite ice cream flavor?

Vanilla tbh. I really, really like vanilla everything. 

18. How often do you read?

Haaaaaaa I feel called out. When I was younger and had more free time and less things that I wanted to actively learn, I read all the friggen time. 4-6 hours a day. Now... not so much. I like writing better? 

19. Favorite study locations

Somewhere quiet and away from others. I can NOT study in a group. I typically end up in my room. 

20. Favorite book series? 

Young Wizards series by Diane Duane. Very nuanced for a young adult series, lots of mature concepts without making things too grim dark and cynical. Actually, it’s not cynical at all. It’s all about persevering in the face of inevitable loss because every person, every second is WORTH IT. (I’m also like 99% sure there’s a lot of Christian subtext in it, with the forgiveness and the love and the redemption arcs of so many people.) But! It’s not, like, super glaring. I like it because it resonates with me, but it’s not obvious. 

[havocinthebluebox]

Get to know me tag

edI was tagged by @tasha-lemon to do this fun little thing, let’s do this ! Thank you my dear ! 

rules: answer 30 questions then tag 20 blogs you would like to know better.

1. nickname: Sissi is the main one

2. gender: Female

3. star sign: Aquarius

4. height: 1m73 if I remember well, or 5 ft 8

5. time: 22h20

6. birthday: Febuary 11

7. favourite band(s): Just one or two or we’re not out of the woods ! Let’s say Motorhead or Ensiferum.

8. favourite solo artist(s): Bruce Springsteen and Lady Gaga

9. song stuck in my head: La Pulce d’Acqua and La Demoiselle, the French version of this song, both by Angelo Branduardi. Both of them alternately. I am tired. 

10. last movie watched: The Shape of Water. I was really mesmerized !

11. last show watched: Food Wars

12. when did i create my blog: In 2011, since I think it was the same year as @tasha-lemon.

13. what do i post: Anything and everything. Things that I enjoy !

14. last thing i googled: “Gengar”, I wanted to check the english translation.

15. do you have other blogs: Yep, two : Professionnal and NSFW.

16. do you get asks: Sometimes yes !

17. why did you choose your url: A good account of my mental state and way of thinking. Plus a Doctor Who reference !

18. following: 600 +/-

19. followers: 222, what are y’all doing here ?! Thank you by the way ! 

20. favourite color(s): Blue !

21. average hours of sleep: Never enough !

22. lucky number: 4

23. instruments: Only voice. I’d like to learn to play an instrument !

24. what am i wearing: Oversize black sweater with the kitschest illustration on it (come on, it involve a guitar shaped like an axe !) stolen from my boyfriend a long time ago, and black panty.

25. how many blankets i sleep with: 1 duvet, but my bed is covered in plaids because I like this place to be cozy as hell ! I dont really need it when my boyfriend is here because he is a fuckin radiator too (poke @tasha-lemon).

26. dream job: Chocolate connoisseur. But editor, bookseller or writer seem more realistic !

27. dream trip: Currently it’s Scandinavia.

28. favourite food: Crepes and chocolate. Chocolate crepes.

29. nationality: Cocoricooooo motherfuckers !

30. favourite song now:  Victory Song by Ensiferum but it does vary from day to day.

Tagging : all of my lovely followers willing to do this ! 

[tasha-lemon]

♡ get to know me tag

Because i was tagged by @imyourliquor-youremypoison and i like tag and thank you babe ^^ !!

rules: answer 30 questions then tag 20 blogs you would like to know better.

1. nickname: Tasha

2. gender: female

3. star sign: Cancer ^^

4. height: Let me check ... 5 ft 4 in ^^ !

5. time: 05:01 PM.

6. birthday: 26 june

7. favourite band(s): Caravan Palace !! The Gazette !!

8. favourite solo artist(s): Lady Gaga

9. song stuck in my head: I’m fucking glad i currently do not have a song stuck in my head, thank youXD.

10. last movie watched: I watched Godzilla with my boyfriend because he’s in a fucking kaiju moove. And i love kaiju.

11. last show watched: Space Dandy

12. when did i create my blog: ... Ho boy, i’m a old tumblr girl. October 2011. Booya babe.

13. what do i post: All i want now.

14. last thing i googled: Cned, because i’m following my class with this.

15. do you have other blogs: Nope. I’m a single lady on tumblrXD.

16. do you get asks: When @havocinthebluebox post a tag and I asked her first XD.

17. why did you choose your url: It’s my official nickname.

18. following: 463

19. followers: 169 (why this number is so high... But i love you ^^ !)

20. favourite color(s): FUCKING BLUE !

21. average hours of sleep: 7-8

22. lucky number: 4

23. instruments: Did my mp3 works ?

24. what am i wearing: Turquoise t-shirt, blue pajama’s pants, and an old sweat.

25. how many blankets i sleep with: 1, my boyfriend is a fucking radiator

26. dream job: Mmm... writer.

27. dream trip: Japan (again, forever), Island, Australia (I want to see white shark i want to see white shark HAAAAAAA), Scandinavia, Norwey, Italia souns fun...

28. favourite food: Chocolate. This is a food right now.

29. nationality: French

30. favourite song now: Lone Digger - Caravan Palace (It’s my favorite song since i discovered it, two years ago.)

Tagging @havocinthebluebox @a-random-fandom-friend @fitzchivalrysfool and who want to do this.