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its44intheehouse · 8 months ago

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pairing: lewis hamilton x Wolff!fem!reader

author’s note: GOD this might be awful but please keep in mind that it’s my first story and english is not my first language :) WILL most probably go through major adjustments.

summary: in which her father, Toto Wolff, has always told her to stay away from the young drivers. He never said anything about the older ones though…

warnings: 18+ smut/nsfw, masturbation(f), oral sex(f receiving), fingering, cursing, size kink, unprotected sex, squirting, creampie, age-gap, praise kink, bit of choking.

Being the daughter of a Formula 1 Team Principal never failed to be exciting.

Always VIP treatment, lots of traveling to beautiful countries, numerous job opportunities and getting to meet famous people. You were always grateful for your privileged life but never took advantage of it in a selfish way, although you enjoyed the things it had to offer from time to time. You always refused being treated differently just because of your status. You just weren’t that type of person. You liked working for the things you desired. Your adventurous side always loved a challenge, and that was also the thing your father admired and feared the most about you.

He always encouraged this side of you, ever since you were a kid. If you wanted to learn how to skate, he’d buy you a skateboard. If you spontaneously wanted to spend the next 3 months away from home in another country, he’d book your flight. One day you showed up at his office to show him your first tattoo. You always said you’d never get a tattoo, you didn’t think it would look good on you. But one day you randomly found yourself in front of a tattoo salon and couldn’t resist the curiosity. Your father was never a big fan of tattoos, but he laughed anyway, called you crazy and snapped a few pictures of the tattoo before sending them to your mom.

Toto didn’t have a lot of rules for you. He always told you “Just don’t get yourself in jail, maybe.”. But the most important and unwritten rule was “never involve yourself with the young drivers.”.

He thought they were immature boys and walking red flags, although he deeply respected them for performing in such a dangerous sport as Formula 1. You, on the other hand were never interested in any of them anyway. You befriended a few of the drivers, sometimes partied with them, but no one really caught your interest. No one besides Lewis Hamilton.

Lewis was your father’s most prized possession in the team. 7 times World Champion (or 8 if you ask me), a genuine person, an expert in what he was doing and the best he could get.

Lewis Hamilton emanated power everywhere he went. He always took his work and image very seriously, always told it as it was and his charming personality never failed to impress everyone in the room. Even the drivers looked up to him, hoping to one day be as great as him. Your first encounter with him was when you were only 15 years old, and to say that you were immediately intimidated by him was an understatement.

The nervousness you constantly felt when you were around him was originally a reaction to all the things you heard about the driver. But as time passed, you found yourself intimidated for others reasons. Maybe it was because you were a teenager and your hormones were going crazy, or because of all the books and fanfiction you used to read at that time, but you couldn’t take your eyes away from him anymore. Everything about him drew you in. His tall and muscular body, his numerous tattoos that gave him a dangerous and playboy vibe, his soothing but rough voice adorned with the most beautiful british accent, his braided hair and smooth skin… That man was basically sex on legs. One of God’s finest pieces.

He instantly took a very protective role in your life. To him, you were basically a child, especially due to the big age-gap between you. But you were also his boss’s daughter so he naturally felt the need to protect you.

Now, at 23, you managed to keep a close friendship with the driver. He was always there if you needed advice for something, always there to rant to about your crazy life and always there for a good time. You spent a lot of vacations with him and his friends. Went to a lot of road trips, skateboard dates, dinner or breakfast dates, countless movie nights, sometimes just the two of you. And although your crush on him never went away, in fact the adoration and attraction only deepened, he not once tried anything with you. He always kept things friendly between you two, decent.

And it frustrated the shit out of you. Sometimes you would catch him staring at you, or even touching you for a minute longer, but never more than that. And you slowly began losing hope that one day he’d see you as more than a friend and his boss’s daughter.

————————————————————————

It’s Friday night. Since you didn’t have any plans for today and were bored out of your mind, you decided to call Lewis to ask if he would go out with you tonight. He apologized and told you that he wasn’t really feeling like doing anything crazy tonight, but insisted that you could come over and spend time together, maybe watch a movie or something. You accepted immediately.

So here you were now, 1AM in his living room, with your head on his lap and eyes closed. You didn’t mean to fall asleep really, but your fucked up sleep schedule was beginning to take a toll on you, making you doze off at very random times. Plus, the way his hand was mindlessly running through your hair felt too good.

You slowly open your eyes when you feel Roscoe licking at your hand. With a groan, you try to sit up and take in everything that’s going on. How long have you been asleep for? “Suits” is still playing on the TV, the room is almost dark except for the light of the television, Roscoe is sitting by the couch, looking back at you with his tongue hanging out, and Lewis is on his phone, probably reading through his emails.

“Thought you’d never wake up.” He chuckled, locking his phone and throwing it on the couch.

“I’m so sorry, Lewis.” You sighed, rubbing your face with your hands in hope of getting rid of the sleepiness and the headache you just woke up with. “I didn’t mean to, lately I’ve been having trouble with sleep. Maybe it’s because of school, I don’t know. My schedule doesn’t really allow me a healthy bed time anymore.”

He looks worried as he reaches out to you, shaking your arm a little.

“You can sleep here if you want. It’s late, you’re obviously very tired. I don’t want you driving back home in this state.” He proposes.

“Yeah? I can?” You chuckle, placing your hand on his. Your stomach flutters when you feel his soft, warm skin.

He looks rather angelic in the low light. His eyes are shiny but tired, his lips look soft and juicy, and his body is comfortably spread on the sofa.

“You know you can, bunny.”

Bunny. He loves to call you that. Ever since you were a teenager, he’d always call you that. You found it cute.

“Okay, then. Can I borrow some clothes, though? These jeans aren’t the most comfortable thing in the world to be honest.” You say, getting up from the couch.

“Yeah, sure.”

You follow him to the guest room. The bed looks cozier than ever, and you quickly find yourself hopping into it, groaning at the feeling of the comfortable and soft mattress. Lewis laughs and leaves you for a moment, but comes back a few seconds later, throwing some clothes on the bed beside you.

“Got you a shirt and some pants. But I’m not sure the pants are gonna fit though. You’re… a lot smaller than me for sure.” He spoke, crossing his arms to his chest. “Sorry.”

“No, Lewis. It’s all good.” You giggle, waving your arm lazily. “Thank you.”

You take a moment to look at him again. He has a soft smile on his face and his body is leaning against the door frame, the dim light in the room accentuating the muscles in his arms. He looked huge. And delicious.

Jesus.

“Good night.” He gently whispered. You say it back and then he finally leaves the room, leaving you all alone. And frustrated.

With a deep sigh, you grab the clothes he gave you and inspect them a little. A simple tie dye t-shirt(he loves these), and a pair of shorts, probably the smalest he had in his wardrobe. And they still looked big. Making a decision, you throw the pants on a chair and only keep the t-shirt, then start to change out of your clothes.

Once that was done, you floop back on the bed and check your phone real quick, before turning off the lights and pulling the blanket over your body.

————————————————————————-

You woke up sweaty. With a groan, you quickly pull the covers off your hot body to try and get some air. Your hair is sticking to your forehead and the massive headache you just woke up with already makes you irritated.

Stretching your body a little, you reach for the phone sitting on the nightstand to check the time. 4AM.

“God dammit.” You curse under your breath, rubbing your face with your palm.

You could feel the faint smell of Lewis’s cologne on the t-shirt he gave you. Le Labo’s Rose 31, his favorite. Biting your lip, you bring the material to your nose and inhale the scent. A moan almost escaped you. You could basically feel him, it was like he was in the room with you again. And that definitely didn’t help your current state.

You start wondering what he might be doing right now. He’s probably sound asleep, spread on his king sized bed with nothing but his boxers on, quietly snoring, like he always does. You wish you were there to see him. Admire him. Touch his skin.

Subconsciously, you let your hand travel down your chest and under the shirt, touching at your hot skin. A shiver hits you, and you curiously start to feel around your stomach with your fingers. With eyes closed, you imagine Lewis touching you like that.

It wasn’t unusual for you to think about him like that. But in your defense, you just couldn’t help it. Everything about him felt masculine. His energy, his body, his voice, his gestures. He was basically the man you always dreamed of having, even for one night. You always wondered what he would be like in bed.

Maybe he’d whisper softly in your ear, call you “sweetheart”, take his time on making you feel good, praising you for how good you are for him. How good you take him. Or maybe, he’d manhandle you, make you do whatever he asks, put you in any position he wants while choking you with his big arms and mockingly slapping your face, degrading you for being such a whore, as his cock would slide in and out of you at an abusive pace, making your juices drip out of you with every deep, harsh thrust.

You don’t even remember the exact moment your fingers started rubbing your clit through your panties. You were definitely soaked, the wetness making a faint noise everytime your middle finger would flick at your pussy down to your enterance. A needy whimper escapes you. You needed more.

With the other hand, you quickly grab at your boobs, softly massaging them one by one and pulling on your sensitive nipples. It was all too much but still not enough. The material of your panties was drenched at this point, so you quickly moved them aside.

Circling your awaiting hole a few times, you insert a finger inside slowly.

“Mm, fuck.” You moan, hiding your face into the pillow so you could hopefully hide the sounds you were making.

You imagined Lewis doing this to you. Sitting between your thighs so he can have a clear image of your creamy pussy as he is pumping his fingers in and out of you. He’d have his mouth on you from time to time, sucking your clit harshly and moving his tongue from one hole to the other. His deep brown eyes would never leave your figure, trying to take in every single inch of you and memorize it, so he can always remember how desperate and ruined he makes you.

“Such a pretty pussy. U’re doing so good for me.” He’d praise.

The squelching sound of your cunt momentarily takes you off the trance. Your hand is wet and you’re working one more finger inside of you now, as your other hand desperately rubs at your sensitive button. You can’t believe you’re doing this in Lewis’s house, especially when his room is so close to yours, but you shamelessly don’t care enough about that right now, not when you’re so close to your orgasm.

“Mphh, Lewis…” You cry out, eyes shut.

As your back arches off the mattress, you start scissoring the fingers inside your pussy faster. You gasp for air as your legs begin to shake violently, your swollen clit throbbing uncontrollably. You moan louder than expected as you come all over your fingers, and the thought of Lewis hearing your needy sounds almost excites you more.

After a few moments, you remove the fingers from your pussy. You needed a shower so bad, maybe it would wash away the shame you were feeling at the pit of your stomach. Were you too loud? Did he hear how pathetic you’ve been, just from his scent and a few scenarios of him fucking you with his mouth and fingers?

Sitting up, you scrunch your face in disgust at the feeling of your drenched and cold underwear. You curse in your head for not taking them off early on. What the fuck were you supposed to wear now?

Deciding to swallow your shame, you finally get up from the bed to make your way to the bathroom that was connected to your room. After washing your hands twice with the expensive soap bar, you look into the mirror to see just how messy you really were. Your cheeks were flushed, your mascara was smudged, skin was glowy with sweat and your hair looked like a bird nest. Basically, it was as if you had just taken part in a gangbang.

With a sigh, you take off your panties and run them through the water, trying to wash away the sin you had just committed. Getting lost in thoughts, your stomach almost startles you as it begins to growl loudly. The little amount of energy you had left and now you felt hungry, and incredibly thirsty. Balancing your options, you wonder if you should leave the room to go get something to eat from the kitchen. Your panties were still wet and you couldn’t imagine wearing them now, but you knew you’d never be able to fall asleep again if your stomach constantly demanded food. Plus, drinking tap water was never an option.

“Fuck.”

Slipping your underwear back on, you inspect yourself in the mirror a little and pull on Lewis’s t-shirt, making sure that it covers enough, just in case.

The whole penthouse is silent as you walk to the kitchen. A few lights are still on, but that’s just how Lewis prefers it. You assume Roscoe is in his room fast asleep as well, because you don’t run into him on your way. Opening the fridge, you immediately grab a bottle of water and place it on the counter, before scanning for some food. The indian takeout boxes were really calling your name right now, so you grabbed two of them before closing the door with your foot.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

You almost drop the boxes from your hands when you hear his voice. Turning around, you find him staring at you, with a little smirk on his face.

“You almost shit your pants, bunny. Did I scare you?” He laughs, approaching you.

“Jesus, Hamilton. Almost gave me a heart attack, could’ve died right here on your kitchen floor.” You exhaled, dropping the boxes on the table and placing a hand on your chest, trying to see if your heart was still beating.

“I’m sorry. Won’t do it again.” He chuckles and briefly massages your shoulders, before pushing past you to grab a bottle of water from the fridge. After he takes a few sips, he speaks again. “Why aren’t you sleeping?”

“Why aren’t you sleeping?” You bite back, drinking from your own water, almost gulping down the whole thing.

The thought of what you just did a few moments ago creeps into your head again, and you suddenly wish the ground would swallow you. What if he heard? You get self conscious remembering that you’re only wearing his shirt and your destroyed pair of panties that were still wet and uncomfortable, so you pull on the hem to hopefully try and cover yourself as much as possible.

His top lip twitches for a second, then he smiles and shrugs. “Was thirsty.”

He looked absolutely delicious now, with nothing on but a pair of grey shorts and his braids down. His abs were shining underneath the dim lights, and all you wanted right now really was to drop down on your knees and lick them. You couldn’t look further down though, you feared you might pass out if you saw the imprint of his dick in his pants.

You had the opportunity to take a peek, though. Multiple times. Especially on race weekends, when he would just grab his dick in his hand and struggle to readjust himself through the racing suit before hopping in the car. You knew he was big. You fantasized about how he would feel on your tongue, heavy and large. About how he would fuck your throat rough, making you choke on his cock. About how he would hardly be able to slide into your tight, warm pussy, but when he would finally make it, he’d rip you apart with it until you were left a crying, overstimulated mess.

“Why are you so red, bunny? Are you ill?” He asks, furrowing his brows.

When you finally snap out of your filthy thoughts, he’s already in front of you, checking your temperature with the back of his hand, looking concerned.

“N-no.” You almost sound unsure, your voice cracking a little.

“No?” He shakes his head, cupping your flushed cheeks in his hands.

You couldn’t make eye contact with him, even though you knew he was intently watching you. He was so close that there was almost no space to breathe anymore, and you couldn’t take it, so you hesitantly backed off.

A cheeky smirk was plastered on his face though, and he quickly looked you up and down before grabbing a fork and digging into the food left on the table. You just stood there, petrified. No thoughts behind your eyes.

“Aren’t you gonna eat?” He spoke again.

Well, the hunger disappeared, that’s for sure.

You shake your head then clear your throat. “Not hungry anymore. I think I’ll just go back to bed.”

“Hm.”

He doesn’t say anything after that, so you grab the bottle of water and make your way past him, whispering a “good night” softly. After a few seconds, he speaks again.

“Maybe this time you’ll be able to get some sleep instead of moaning my name while you’re touching yourself.”

Your stomach drops. Maybe you’re imagining things. Maybe you’ve gone crazy. But there’s no way this was happening right now. This can’t be real.

You’re stuck in your place for a few moments, calculating your possibilities of escape. Throwing yourself out the window sounds like a good idea now. But you feel cornered, and you can’t think of what to do or say. You were doomed, for sure. But you choose to play dumb instead, so you anxiously turn to him and speak.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve been asleep the whole time.”

He says nothing, and that worries you even more.

Then he throws the fork in the sink and finally faces you. He lifts his eyebrows and leans on the counter, with his arms folded to his chest.

“No, you weren’t.” He spoke. “Come here.” He gestures with his hand.

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you decide to listen to him and get closer.

“Please don’t tell dad.” You beg. There was no point in denying anymore. He knew.

He chuckles then, and furrows his brows, looking at you funny. God, you just wish all this would be over already. It felt humiliating.

“You think I’d tell Toto about how his daughter is pleasuring herself to the thought of me?”

His words come out as a whisper as he carefully moves a strand of hair behind your ear.

“I don’t know…”

“What were you thinking about?”

You finally get the courage to look into his eyes then. You’re not sure you heard him right.

“What?”

“I think you heard me just right, princess. What were you thinking about when you had these pretty fingers deep inside your pussy?” He asks, lifting your hand and pressing a few kisses to your fingers.

A whine almost escapes your mouth while you’re watching it happen. You’ve never heard Lewis talk like that, especially towards you, and it both sexually frustrated you as well as made you impossibly shy. A deep shade of red is present on your face and you seriously don’t know if you should just risk it all and tell him about your little fantasies or act dumb about it.

“Y/n”

You snap out of it. “I-I don’t know what to say, Lewis. This is so humiliating.” You sigh deeply, covering your face with your hands.

“Hey, hey.” He shushed you, pulling you into his arms. He smelled so good, and his skin felt hot pressed against yours, even with the t-shirt you were wearing as a barrier. “No need for that, bunny. It’s just me.” His words come out as a whisper as he is moving his hand up and down your back. “…Just us.”

Lifting your head slowly, you look into his eyes and bite your lip. This was all you ever wanted. For him to want you back. And now that he finally hinted that he might be into you in that way, had you at a loss of words and action.

Fuck it, you thought. It’s been too long. Too much time spent on secretive glances, crushing, overthinking, masturbating to the thought of him. Maybe you could finally get something out if it.

“I was thinking of you… Touching me.”

“Good girl. How was I touching you, hm?” The praise goes straight to your core as his head falls to your neck to press a few wet kisses, and you swore you could die right there on the spot. His hands squeeze your waist a little before traveling down to your ass, massaging patiently, waiting for you to respond to his question.

You moan at the action, getting lost in the feeling of him touching you like that. In a second, he lifts you up by your thighs and you unconsciously wrap your legs around his waist. He sits you on the counter then positions himself between your bare legs. His warm hands touch the insides of your thighs, making your breath hitch. You still can’t believe this is happening.

“You look so good in my clothes…” He mumbles, lifting one of his hands to your shirt and squeezing your skin a little. When he reaches your breasts, he squeezes harder.

“Mm… Lewis…” You whine pathetically, waiting for more.

“That’s what you were moaning a few minutes ago, baby?”

You look up to find him staring at you intently with his teeth pulling at his lower lip. His eyes were darker, full of lust. You enjoy having him like this, you realized. A man, the man you dreamed about, about to pleasure you.

“Yes.” You confess sincerely, batting your eyelashes at him.

“You’re such a naughty girl…” He whispers, touching your soft cheek with his finger.

His other hand starts wondering further underneath your shirt, and you find yourself opening your legs wider, waiting desperately for his touch. You can feel one of his fingers pressing against your clit only a few seconds later, and you can’t help but moan already. He rubs tight, circular circles on your sensitive button and groans, pushing your body back. You lean back and let him lift your legs on the counter.

“Shit, bunny. You look so delicious right now."

He reaches the band of your underwear and pulls on it urgently, leaving you bare in front of him. Normally you'd get self conscious everytime a man saw you naked, but for some reason that wasn't the case now. The desire to have Lewis eat you out was much bigger than any insecurity you may have. You grow impatient already just thinking about it and you feel your pussy clenching around nothing. He notices.

“I’m going to eat this pretty pussy.”

“Please.” You say immediately, eager to feel his tongue on your most sensitive spot.

He pulls you closer to the edge of the counter and gets on his knees, holding onto your shaky legs. You played this scenario in your head over and over again so many times, and you craved to see it finally happen. You really need to see him.

Standing up a little, you think you might just pass out. There he was, propped between your legs, licking a fat stripe of your pussy. He makes eye contact then and moans, connecting his lips to your puffy clit and sucking, hard.

Your body twitches on instinct and you whimper, pushing your needy pussy into his face. He moans and starts licking up and down your cunt, pushing his tongue inside you from time to time.

“Yes… Just like that.” You manage to say.

He’s hungrily lapping at your cunt like he hadn’t eaten in days, collecting all your sweet essence with his eager mouth. You can’t help but yelp a little when you feel two of his thick, long fingers pushing inside your tight pussy. It stings a little, but he doesn’t let you adjust, instead he pushes them deeper and curls them, making your eyes roll and your jaw drop.

“Oh my god." You gasp, arching your back so hard that you think it might break in half. His mouth is still attached to your sensitive clit, pressing torturous licks on it.

He pulls away a little bit, looking at how his two fingers push in and out of you, all shiny with your juices. His darkened eyes were glued to your pussy, like he was hypnotized by the sight. And he was. Suddenly, his eyes snap to yours and you think you’d never seen something hotter in your entire life.

“Look at you, baby… Hear the sounds your pretty pussy is making for me? You’re so fucking wet.” He humms and gives your puffy clit a sharp slap, fucking his fingers faster inside you.

You scream his name, like you always dreamed of doing. You’re desperately trying to hump his hand to get more, already feeling the familiar tightness in your lower stomach building rapidly. He doesn’t like that, so he quickly pushes your hips down with his free hand, keeping you in place. You don’t get to protest, because then he curls his fingers right on your g-spot, having your body tense immediately. You’re almost breathless and trashing your tiny body on his counter, and when he gets his hand on you and starts to flick your clit with rapid movements, you know you’re done for.

“That’s it. Cum all over my fingers like a good girl.”

You don’t hear anything for a few seconds after that. Your ears are tingling, your toes are curling and your whole body is shaking violently. Your orgasm washes over you in an instant, your pussy clenching down on his two fingers.

While you’re busy trying to catch your breath, he doesn’t stop. He continues to fuck you with his fingers, a bit slower now, and he reattached his mouth to your pussy, licking it slowly.

Feeling overstimulated, you immediately jerk away from his touch, twitching uncontrollably.

“N-no… too much!” You whimper, pushing his head back.

“Mm.” He slowly removes his fingers, and you feel yourself clenching around nothing. He’s chasing a trail of cum that your pussy is pushing out with his tongue and moans. “Such a sweet pussy. Sweetest I’ve ever had.” He praises.

You don’t say anything. Mostly because you can’t. Your whole body feels like jelly, still shaky from the powerful orgasm you just had. But you knew he wasn’t done with you yet. No, he gets up and grabs your chin forcefully, smashing your lips together. You can taste yourself on his lips and it makes your head spin and your pussy leak. Again.

When he finally pulls away, he takes a moment to look at your fucked out expression and humms, licking his lip.

“Was it good, bunny?” A smirk creeps out on his face.

“Yes…” You reply, the shyness taking place in you again as you batt your eyelashes at him.

“Good…” He whispers softly, tugging slowly on your bottom lip. “God, I want to fuck you so bad right now.”

God, the things this man makes you feel. He just fucked you stupid with his mouth and fingers and now he wants to fuck your pussy? It had to be a dream.

You want to take advantage of this moment for as long as you can.

“Fuck me, Lewis. I want it.”

The way you just look up at him so innocently but so seductive at the same time, with lips swollen, slightly messy hair and smudged mascara, makes his dick twitch. It isn’t the first time he’s rock hard for you though. No. You never knew this, but he had his eyes on you too. For the past few months, at race weekend, everytime he’d see you, you’d have him losing his mind. Walking around in short skirts and crop tops, or those lovely sundresses you adore so much. It made his dick throb, and he had to make up some excuses a few times just to run back to his driver’s room and touch himself. But he wasn’t only attracted to you because of those things. Your energy captivated him completely, and he knew he wasn’t the only one dreaming about having you. He wasn’t blind, nor stupid. He saw the way the other younger drivers or random people in the pit crew looked at you. How they smiled at you or tried to make you laugh, subtly touching you. It made him feral.

Toto was his boss. They go way back. Lewis admired your father, in many ways, and the bond they formed through working together was tight, for sure. He knew about the stupid rule he had for you, about dating or messing around with the drivers, and he respected that. Up until recently, when he started looking at you in a different light, and the rule suddenly frustrated him deeply. He never had a problem staying away from you. The need to protect you was the only thing on his mind. Then he started to finally see you.

How smart you were, how much joy you bring when you walk into a room. How everyone stops to look or listen to you when you talk. How adventurous you are and openly emotional without a care about what other people might think of you. The way you’re always there for people, the warmth you possess. Your unintentional seductiveness. Your charm.

Now, he had you exactly where he wanted. He wasn’t sure at first if he should tell you that he heard your sweet sounds when you masturbated to the thought of him, but he became desperate. All he needed was confirmation that you felt the same way about him as he felt about you. And he got it. He wasn’t gonna let you slip away this time. And he was done thinking about how complicated the situation is with your father.

Grabbing at your hand, he helps you get off the counter. You look at him confused, scared that he might realize that everything was a mistake and he’d changed his mind. But the thought quickly vanishes when he starts kissing your neck and nipping at your skin, lifting your shirt with his hands.

“I’m not gonna fuck you in a kitchen. My sweet baby deserves a bed, no?” His raspy voice sends goosebumps on your skin and you nod, letting him walk you backwards to his room, as he finally manages to get rid of the only material left on your body.

When you get to his room, he carefully pushes you on the bed, with him on top. The cold air in the room hits your sensitive flesh and makes your nipples harden. Licking your lips, you raise your head from the soft pillow to look at him. His gaze is darkened and his bottom lip sits between his teeth, pulling at it desperately, like he was trying so hard to keep his control. You wanted him to lose it. All of it.

“Please, Lewis… Fuck me. Wanted this for so long.” A whine escapes your lips and you pout, caging his body between your legs as your legs wrap tightly around his torso.

Your confession made him groan. He wanted to keep this moment in his memory forever. How needy you are begging for him to fuck you, how pretty you looked all spread out on his bed, with your hair tousled on his pillow, your lips puffy from his kisses and your eyes glossy and dazed.

Finally, he gets rid of the shorts he was wearing, pulling them off along with his boxers. You're left speechless as you shamelessly stare at his very erect cock. It's thick and you can spot a few angry veins almost popping, running up towards the head. It's standing proud and tall glued to his pelvis, almost reaching his belly button, and it has your mouth water.

He notices how you stare at him with your cheeks flushed and your lip between your teeth and smirks, tapping your thigh a few times to get your attention.

"What's wrong, baby?"

"It's so big..."

"Yeah? Never had a real man before, princess?" He asks, raising your leg to his shoulder and pressing soft kisses on your soft skin while maintaining eye contact with you.

You shake your head timidly.

"Gonna make you feel so good. You trust me?"

"Yes." You respond immediately, squirming under him.

"Just hold on for a sec. I gotta have some condoms in here." He lets go of your leg and leans towards his nightstand to search for the condoms.

"W-wait." You stopped him, pressing a hand to his chest. You were anxious when your next words left your lips. "I... I'm clean, and on birth control, so if you want, there's no need for that."

He turned his head to look at you and stopped in his tracks.

"Want me to fuck you bare, bunny?" He reached a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and looked at you lovingly, with a grin on his face.

"Mhm." You mumbled, nodding your head. "If that's okay with you, of course!" You rushed the words out.

"I'm more than okay with that." He hummed, caressing your hip with his thumb. "Come 'ere."

He pulled you lower on the bed and leaned forward, gripping your cheeks and smashing his lips with yours. He kisses you slow at first, taking his time to taste you. Then, as his hands start to explore your naked body, it turns wild. You feel dizzy as you wrap your hands around his neck to bring him even closer and your hot bodies stick to each other. It feels so intimate, you've never experienced something like this with someone before. His erection is standing right between your legs and it makes you raise your hips eagerly. You want him inside already.

"So eager." He whispers and smirks, pulling away a bit.

You glance down and lick your lips as he lines himself up, watching him tap your clit a few times with his cock, then pushing his head through your sensitive folds to collect all your juices. It sends jolts of electricity through your body and you whimper, spreading yourself a bit more. When he finally slides in, it's so overwhelming that you let your mouth hang open with a loud moan. The stretch is stinging a lot, but there's another sensation that comes with it that makes it so pleasurable at the same time.

Lewis watches you carefully and stills his movements, to let you adjust to his size. Your eyebrows are slightly furrowed as you try to relax as much as you can to accomodate your thight walls around him. Once you feel the pain diminuate a bit you nod your head, letting him know that he can move further.

He slips in a little more then and lets himself moan at the heavenly feeling of your bare, tight pussy squeezing him tightly.

"Doing sooo good, baby. Taking me like a pro." He praises, moving your damp hair out of your face.

He bottoms out inside you and you whimper. He's so deep that you could swear you felt it in your stomach, but you want more.

As if he could read your mind, he slowly pulls out a bit then pushes himself inside again, making you let out tiny mewls and moans as you got to feel every ridge and vein of his cock. Lewis humms and buries his face in your neck, leaving wet, hot kisses all over it before going down to your breasts and taking one of them in his mouth and swirling his tongue around your hard, sensitive nipple. He starts to thrust his hips in a steady rhythm while taking your other breast in his mouth and all you can do is arch your back and whine, overwhelmed by the intense feeling.

"So fucking tight." He hissed, leaning back to grab your thighs and lift them on his shoulders, the new position allowing him to hit your spot better. You felt so full of him, and you were ready to cry from the pleasure.

"Lewis." You let out a loud moan and touch his abs, scratching them as he suddenly surprises you with a rougher pace that makes you roll your eyes back and let out a cry.

“Shit.” He curses, groaning when he feels your pussy clench around his fat cock. “Thought about fucking this pretty pussy every single day lately. And now look at you, all fucked out on my bed.”

His words make your head spin. You had no idea he thought about this just like you did, so many times.

“Y-you thought about me?” You manage to ask between moans, looking down for a second to catch a glimpse of his dick sliding in and out of you at a fast pace.

He went in for a messy kiss then pulled back a little, looking at you with half closed eyes. “You have no idea.” He mutters, grabbing your neck softly.

The sounds in the room are intoxicating. It’s filled with heavy breaths, moans, skin slapping repeatedly and the filthy sound of your impossibly wet pussy getting filled to the brim by Lewis. Your gaze is locked with his and it feels like there’s just the two of you left in this world. Nothing matters anymore. Not your dad, not your age gap, nothing. It’s so intense and intimate that it almost has your heart burst out of your chest.

Your thighs are trembling as he folds them to your chest, and your hands are frantically searching for something to grip onto, while incoherent sounds are dripping off your lips.

“You wanna cum, princess?” He asks, smirking down at you.

“Yes! Yes, please please don’t stop.” You beg, shaking your head as short screams leave your mouth.

He’s quick to drag a hand down to your pussy and starts rubbing your clit harshly with his thumb to force your release. The added pleasure makes you pulsate rapidly around his cock and you find yourself arching your back off the mattress again, struggling to breathe as your orgasm is nearing quickly.

“Come on, want you to make a mess on this cock, baby. Can you do that for me?”

You nod your head pathetically and yelp when he pinches your swollen clit, letting out a loud cry as your orgasm washes over you. It hits you so quickly and so violently that it makes your breath get stuck and your eyes squeeze shut while your legs are uncontrollably shaking. Your juices are dripping down Lewis’s cock and onto the mattress underneath you, and it’s a sight to die for as he watches it all happen.

“Good girl. Did so good f’ me.” He coos, but doesn’t stop the movements of his hips, although he slows down a bit to let you come down from your orgasm.

When you open your eyes to look at him, you find him already looking at you, with an enamored expression on his face. His hand is softly caressing your thigh while he is admiring the post-orgasmic glow of your skin.

Soon enough, he is picking up his pace again and you whine in discomfort and overstimulation, furrowing your brows.

“Can’t. Please. Can’t.” You squirm underneath him.

“You can, baby. Come on, just a little bit more.”

Using his arms, he spreads your legs wider so he can have more access to you. His thrusts quicken again and his fingers attaches themselves to your clit again, pressing into it in circular motions. You were squeezing him so tightly that he could barely move inside you but he pulled through, ramming his hips into yours with brutal force, trying to chase his own release.

“Oh.” You gasped and glued your eyes down to where your cunt was greedily sucking him in. Your milky essence is visible at the base of his cock and the sight is downright filthy.

“Fuck.” He grunts, also watching where you two are connected before he lunges towards you and grips your neck more tightly and yanks you forward a bit. You prop up on your elbows and look at him with wide, doe eyes, moaning uncontrollably. “Where do you want it, bunny?”

“Inside!” You respond immediately, placing one of your hands around his wrist. “Want you to come inside me. Please.”

Your eagerness to take his cum inside your tiny walls makes him shiver with enthusiasm. His tip hits your g-spot with every powerful snap of his hips and it made you part your lips in bliss. Lewis takes the opportunity to slide his tongue inside your mouth, kissing you messily. You suddenly start to feel a different kind of pressure at the pits of your stomach and you wince, pulling back from the kiss.

“Lewis… I think there’s something wrong. Feels different.” You slurred, your eyes widening in fear.

“It’s alright, baby. I’m here. Give me one more, yeah?” He grunted, flicking at your clit with his palm rapidly.

The bed is moving with the rhythm of his aggressive thrusts and you feel your muscles contract and twitch with every move. You’re fluttering around him desperately as you scratch down his back with your polished nails and he moans deeply.

“Fuck. Gonna stuff this cunt. Come on, come for me. again, baby.” You know he is close by how much you can feel him throb inside of you.

With a particularly sharp thrust your orgasm washes over you, and you scream, letting your back fall on the mattress as you squirted, your juices making a mess on both you and Lewis. The sight makes him burst instantly and he groans, throwing his head back while he stills inside of you, pumping you full of his cum.

You’ve never done this before. I mean, you definitely heard of squirting, but no one was ever able to get you to this stage. You quickly become self conscious. What if he didn’t like it? What if he found you disgusting now? Terrified, you look up to him only to find out how wrong you were. He is already looking your way, with a huge smirk on his face.

“Look at that. My girl squirted all over the place.”

You blush deeply at his words and cover your face with your hands, but he is quick to grab them and pin them to the bed around your head.

“Why are you hiding? What’s wrong?” He chuckled, amused by the childish action.

“I… I’ve never done that before.”

“Did it feel good though?” He asked with a smug grin.

“Mhm…” You bite your lip and writhe slightly, making him moan at the sudden movement.

He carefully pulls out of you and leans back on his heels, only to see both of your releases slowly drip out of your cunt. He humms and brings two fingers there to massage around your hole, and then he pushes them inside, fucking the cum back into you.

You whine and he stops, looking back at you.

“Wait here for a second, hm? I’m going to draw you a bath.”

You nod and thank him quietly, watching him lovestruck as he gets up from the bed, collects his boxers from the floor and pulls them on, then disappears to the bathroom.

Few minutes later you’re both in the tub, your back is pressed against his chest and your eyes are closed in relaxation while he is lazily running his hand through your hair.

Even though the silence is comfortable, you can’t help but start to overthink. What was he thinking about? You didn’t necessarily think he regretted what you did, but what did it mean? Was he going to ghost you after that? Act like nothing ever happened? You wouldn’t judge him, especially considering the situation with your father, but you hoped that it wouldn’t be the case. Part of you was convinced that he wouldn’t just leave you in the dark like that. That wasn’t Lewis. Could never be Lewis. But your insecurities are still eating you alive.

Then he takes you by surprise again by reading your mind. “What are you thinking about?”

“I was actually wondering what were you thinking about.” You chuckle, leaning your head back a bit to look at him. God, how can this man be so beautiful?

He smiles softly and nuzzles his nose along your cheek, pressing a sweet and tender kiss to it.

You let out a breath and sigh, closing your eyes at the sensation. “I was just asking myself… what now, I guess.” You shrugged, with a heavy heart.

He furrows his brows and grabs your chin, forcing you to look at him. “What do you want?”

You gulped and licked your lips, looking at him through your lashes. “I want you.”

“Then you have me. And you know I want you too. But it’s going to be a lot more complicated than that.” He whispers to you and you feel your heart drop on the spot, afraid of what he might be insinuating.

Noticing the broken look in your eyes, he quickly places his hands on both your cheeks and leans forward. “What I mean by that is, that we should be careful. I know keeping things a secret isn’t healthy, but giving the circumstances, I don’t think it would benefit either of us right now if someone found out about what we have going on. I promise that it won’t last forever, I would never keep you a secret, but for now that’s just the way things are.”

You take in his words. You know he is right. And you’ll take anything as long as it means that he’ll be finally yours. Even though the thought of keeping a secret like that, especially from your dad, makes you feel uneasy. But you’re so ready to give it a shot, just for him. What if everything turns out alright in the end?

“I know. And I understand.” You nodded, closing your eyes and pressing your lips against his in a tender kiss.

When you pull back, he gives you a quick wink and a smile, tapping the inside of your thigh lightly. “Come on, let’s get you to bed.”

#lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton smut #lewis hamilton imagine #f1 smut #f1 x reader #f1 fanfic #f1 #formula 1 #lh44 #lh44 x reader

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lovexjoe · 5 months ago

Text

Unspoken

Part 1

Synopsis: Jack and Y/N have been best friend for years. She recently ended her 2 year relationship, due to moving to Atlanta for a better job opportunity. What’s going to happen when she stays with Jack for a week ?

Warning: fluffy, angst?, language and smut🧎🏽‍♀️

Y/N POV

Great!!! I finally found an apartment for myself, but I have to stay at a hotel for a week due to maintenance. I sighed as I begin to search the internet for a hotel suitable to my needs. Currently I’m at Jack’s house, cause he offered to let me stay the weekend as I sorted myself out. Moving to a new state is draining. I left a lot of my things back home as my mom said it’s good to just start fresh. So I packed what I needed and hopped on the plane. I left so much behind, even my 2 year relationship. Surprisingly, I’m okay and even happier that it ended. There wasn’t a spark between us. He treated me well, but the relationship over all was boring. I guess I kept it going for so long, because it was better than being alone.

“Alright what’s got you so stress? You been glue to the computer since you woke up” Jack says as he sits down next to me on the couch.

“The apartment won't be ready for another week and I need to find a hotel beca-”

“Hell no! Come on, you know you can stay here till it’s ready. I’m not taking no for an answer either. Now can you stop stressing before you explode. That vein on your forehead is serious” He starts his usual teasing. I laughed and playfully shoved him.

Arguing with him was useless. It was his way or no way. I finally close my laptop and enjoyed whatever tv show he was currently hooked on. He stretched out his left arm and placed it on the back on the couch. I crawl into my usual spot: snuggled up with a blanket.

“I missed you. I know you’re stressed but I’m happy to finally spend some time with you this week.” Jack says honestly. You were taken aback but also happy as well to be here with him.

“Me too”

Jack’s POV

She takes her usual spot on the opposite end of the couch, I so badly want to pull her close to me. As selfish as it sounds I hope her apartment takes an extra week so she could stay longer. And those god damn PJs she wears is gonna end me. She could wear a turtleneck and I’d probably still have the same reaction.

I had met her through Druski as she was working with him for a while on video concepts and managing his social media. As soon as they linked up, she got his account to gain a million followers within a month. Thats why Jack put his full trust in her when it came to his social media. He’ll give her a heart attack here or there when he posts some random video of him trying to dance. Keyword is try because he looks like he’s glitching half the time.

~~~~~

They indulge in a few episodes together before both of their stomachs start grumbling. Jack grabs his phone to open up UberEats. She gives him an insane look.

“Jack you already ordered UberEats for breakfast, do you ever actually cook?” She arched her brows at him and he just looks at her cause lowkey she ate him up with that one.

Oh yea forgot to mention, she got attitude that could last a lifetime and he fucking loved it.

“You know I can’t cook!” He tried to justify but she’s already up and headed to the kitchen scanning the pantry and fridge for a simple meal.

“Alright since you insist on me staying here for a week, you have to learn how to cook to at least survive.” She points the wooden spoon at him which causes him to laugh and throw his hands up in the air.

“Goddamn Gordon Ramsey when did you even grab that!?”

“Mmm don’t worry about that, give me a cutting board and knife stat! We making the world’s simplest meal. Pasta!”

Pasta? Yeah no, he has spent his entire life over and under cooking pasta noodles. He watches her work the kitchen like a natural, pulling out ingredients he didn’t know what was what but he tried his hardest to pay attention. She started with washing, then cutting then cooking. When it started to heat up in the kitchen, she tossed her hair up in a messy bun and in that moment Jack swore his heart could burst outta his chest. He was trying his best not to stare inappropriately, but she was down right beautiful.

Her ex was an idiot for letting her out of his sight, but he had to thank him because he’s not letting this chance pass up. There’s been multiple times throughout their friendship that her previous relationship and his hookups were not too fond of what they had. Which caused a few months of silence here and there. It use to kill him that he couldn’t reach out to her or hear her voice. She’s the reason why most of his hookups never lasted. Even during sex he wasn’t fully present, always distracted.

As she finished up the tomato basil pasta, she turns around bumping into Jack not realizing he was so close to her. She felt so small around him, he looks down at her and smiles.

“Hi” he says as he looks into her green hazel eyes that complimented her tan skin.

“Hi…” she wish he would just kiss her, but she probably wasn’t what he even wanted. This man has the whole world at his feet. Why would he want her? They both stood there for a few extra seconds, just admiring their favorite features of the other.

He swore she bite her lip

She swore he was staring at her lips

Kiss me already they both thought.

The sizzle of the pot reminded her she needed salt, so she purposely pushes up against him to grab the salt

“Excuuuuseee me” she says innocently causing him to blush.

“Smell yummy, thank you seriously” He says as she hands him his plate. As she makes her plate last, but Jack grabs it and heads over to the dinner table. Pulling out her seat for her, she happily sits as he grabs them some wine.

“Oh my god, this is amazing!” He hums enjoying all the flavors that melt in his mouth. She’s really getting brownie points right now cause once his tummy is full he is a happy camper.

This could be them, she thought. If only he wanted her.

This could be them, he thought. If only she wanted him.

After a few glasses of wine and enjoying the food together. Jack knew she was gonna crave something sweet because anytime he took her out dessert was always a must. He took her plate and nods his head for her to follow him.

He grabs a bowl, vanilla ice cream, sprinkles, chocolate drizzle and whipped cream. Instantly her smile appears on her face, he still remembers her favorite toppings. How could he not though? He remembers everything about her. They both assisted each other is building the sundae.

“Time for the finale!! Whipped cream!” She shakes it up and hands it to him to do the honors. Jack holds down the nozzle but it was stuck. He shook it one more time confused cause he literally just bought it when he told Y/N to stay at his crib. Yes he fully stocked the house and made sure it was squeaky clean before she got there. He even went to target and Ulta and stocked up on products she’d like or needed for the guest room.

“This thing is stupid!” He holds the nozzle facing Y/N and it shoots out straight onto her neck and face. They both looked shock but Jack was trying so hard to hold his laughter in.

“Oh you little shit!” They both busted into laughter.

The wine definitely taking effect as laughter filled the air. Their stomach hurting so much from being full and the happiness that overcame them. Grabbing a towel, Jack pulls her close and the two still having the giggles. She wasn’t in control anymore because she couldn’t believe the words that was escaping her mouth.

“Lick it off of me….” Jack freezes. Is he dreaming? Is she fucking with him? Wouldn’t be a nice joke but the way she was looking at him she’s lucky she doesn’t get bent over this island right now.

“Are you sure?” He looks into her eyes wanting to confirm because if he starts god only knows if he’ll have the strength to stop.

“Yea….make me your dessert.” She wipes some whipped cream off her neck slipping her finger in his mouth to suck it off. The need growing between them as she felt his tongue lick her finger dry. His lips meeting her neck, licking up all whipped cream on her as her moans escape her mouth.

Fuck. He thought this was it, she’s gonna get eaten up tonight, he had to taste her. He was hungry for it. His hands caressing her face, as their lips finally meet. They both dreamt of this moment endless amount of times, but nothing….nothing could compare how this really felt. The little sounds she makes got him bricked up and aching. It’s almost as if she knew what effect she had on him cause her hand begins to palm him through his joggers. He groans into her mouth, causing a certain wetness to form in her panties. She never knew Jack had an aggressive side to him, she always teased him of being vanilla.

He picks her up and sets her onto the island. Slipping her shorts off and spreading her legs. No panties? Fuck, her pussy glistened from her wetness under the lights. She closed her legs, starting to feel shy.

“Nuh uh, open those legs for me. Lemme see that pretty pussy.” Oh god she loves this. He gets on his knees, kissing her lips, taking in her scent causing her hips to buck.

“Jaack please don’t tease,” she feels his breath on her as he laughs, knowing exactly what he was doing. He takes her clit into his mouth, slowly sucking and swirling his tongue. He was so fucking handsome and with your pussy in his mouth made him even hotter. Working his tongue up and down your folds, you lift you hips slightly to ride his face.

Fuck fuck fuck

Jack couldn’t believe how fucking beautiful you looked under the island lights. Everything about you just amazed him. He works his movement with yours as he sees your body tensing up.

“Fuck Jack, I’m- fuck I’m gonna cum!” In that moment he slips two of his fingers in, curving them upwards pumping them in and out. The only thing that could be heard was your cries and the wetness of your pussy. His fingers were big and long you could only imagine what he’ll stretch you out to. He pulls you close to him, placing little kisses along your cheek and neck. He lets you ride out your orgasm from his fingers. He only just begun with you, but he notices the slight sheen of sweat that covered your body.

“You have no fucking idea how long I’ve wanted you.” He places a soft kiss on her lips.

“Jack I need you, please.” She reaches into his jogger to pull him out. His tip already leaking with precum. Teasing him, she rubs his length between her wet folds causing him to groan. The lust that filled both of their eyes as they watch his tip play with her clit. Jack slipped in not being able to handle it anymore.

Y/N lets out a soft cry not realizing how big he really was. Her back was cold against the marbled island, but the way Jack started pounding into her she couldn’t possibly give a fuck about anything

“Jaackkk” she cries out throwing her head back

“I know it’s big baby, you can take it. Be good for me and take it.” His thumb starts to rub circles on her clit as he continues his ruthless thrusting. She was drunk off of his fucking. Not a single thought was running through her head besides the fact that he felt so fucking good and was deep.

“Look at you. Such a good fucking girl taking me. So beautiful baby.” He whispers his praises into her ear, till he feels her clenching him tightly. His free hand grabs the back of her hair firmly to make sure he was looking at him as she cums.

“Mmm fuck, where do you want it?” She better answer quick cause those hazel eyes looked fucked out and he could barely hold on.

“Inside me! P-please please”

Jesus Christ

He nods as he increases his speed, hitting a new spot for her causing her to come undone. She couldn’t even stop the babbling.

“I love you I-I love you Jack.” He kisses her passionately, emptying himself deep inside her.

“I love you too.” He says out of breath.

He picks her up carrying them to his bedroom. She was completely out of it, her eyes closed and sleep slowly taking over her. He couldn’t imagine this moment any better. It happened so naturally. He tucks both of them in pulling her closely. She was his. He was hers. Thank god for that fucking apartment delay.

~~~~~~~~

Y/N woke up feeling satisfied and definitely sore. Some of their friends were suppose to be flying in today to vibe for the next two days. She looks at the sleepy man next to her and smiles. They really had some nasty sex last night when just prior to that they were just best friends. She places a soft kiss on his forehead and decided to make them breakfast. She picked out some boxers and one of his t-shirts and got to work. As she was making them pancakes and eggs, the door bell rang and it was probably Druski since he had the earliest flight. She opens the door to see a girl, who looked like a super model holding a duffel bag.

“Y/N, right?”

“Uhh yeah…I’m sorry who are you?”

“I’m Jack’s girlfriend….”

Part 2? 😌

TAGLIST

@dyttomori @harlowcomehome @itsyagirljaz

#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow smut #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow fanfic #jackman thomas harlow

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daysofyellowroses · 10 months ago

Text

red rose

kerry von erich x afab!reader | 10.9k | 18+ minors dni | tw: mentions of death, language, some smutty implications

It wasn't exactly something you had planned for, certainly not at this stage of your life. Then again, life never did seem to work out the way you had expected. After a very happy and loving childhood and slightly turbulent but overall great teenage years, your world got turned upside down when you turned eighteen.

so i finally finished this, i did not expect it to be over 10k 🫢 i am already thinking i want to write a little part two for this, but i got a whole lot more to write before that! i hope you enjoy this, and if you perservere the whole way through i love you! 🫶🏻💗

🌼

The drive took hours, the immense heat didn't help the feeling of exhaustion that settled over you. It was a rare occasion that you drove back home to Denton from Austin, particularly in the last few years. Now you wouldn't just be visiting, you would be staying.

Your mom had been driving home from work when she got into a car accident, one which ultimately claimed her life. It left an empty space in your heart, one you felt could never be filled. Her death felt impossible to process, you couldn't do anything but feel totally numb. You hadn't cried when you were told by the doctors that she had passed away from her injuries. You hadn't cried when you went to her funeral. You couldn't, the tears wouldn't come. There was just a hollow void in you, you couldn't focus on anything.

After the funeral, you received an acceptance letter from college, which you ignored. You weren't in the right headspace for it, and despite your dad trying to convince you to go, you refused. That was when the guilt sunk in. Why should you get to go on with your life, have new experiences when your mom would never have that opportunity again?

Your dad withdrew into himself too, the two of you didn't talk and when you did it was to fight and argue, both unable to handle your grief.

You needed to get away, and planned to go to Dallas for a new start. That didn't pan out, so you headed to Austin instead, with a renewed determination to start over. And you did, you got yourself a place to stay, a job in a bar, and started getting back on your feet. Over time you got your own apartment and started working in a hair salon, doing basic jobs at first before deciding to professionally train.

After about six months you had gotten in contact with your dad again. It started slow, occasional phone calls or letters, then you visited one Christmas. You weren't super close, but he was the only other person in the world who loved your mom as much as you did, your tether to her. Then, a year or so ago, just when you had thought you were starting to really build a solid bond with your dad, he went quiet. Barely any calls, wouldn't let you visit.

You feared the worst when two months went by with no contact. The neighbors would have contacted you, you knew, but you still worried. Then you got a call from a stranger, who turned out to be your dad's nurse. She explained that he hadn't wanted you to worry, sympathizing when you said you only worried more if he was silent. There was a knot in your stomach when you asked what was wrong, trying not to imagine your dad slowly wasting away in front of you or losing his memories of your mother and you.

When the nurse informed you that your father had rheumatoid arthritis, the knot in your stomach loosened, but only slightly. You learned that the nurse could only visit your father three times a week, and his insurance didn't cover more care. So, you took the decision to give up your life in Austin and head back home to look after your dad.

The sun was just beginning to set when you drove down the familiar road, passing the few neighbors' houses. You turned eventually, heading down the long driveway. Your heart thudded as you spotted the large garage, dozens of cars dotted about in the yard. None of them had been worked on for a long while, you suspected, the owners no doubt not pushing for a quick return.

You drove up to the house, taking a deep breath as you parked your truck. You only took one suitcase up to the door with you, deciding to get the rest of your stuff later. Pushing the doorbell, you took a step back and glanced at the light blue bird feeder hanging by the door. Your mom would sit on the porch for hours and watch birds come and go, she always looked so peaceful when she did.

A few moments later, the door opened and revealed your father on the other side. Neither of you said anything, neither of you moved for a moment before you both stepped forward and wrapped your arms around each other.

“You didn't have to come,” Your father murmured, holding you close. “I'm fine.”

“I know you are,” You nodded, gently rubbing his back. “I wanted to come. Now let me get my things inside, I want this unpacking out of the way.”

Once you had taken your things up to your old bedroom and unpacked, you sat on the end of the bed for a moment. It had been a while since you'd visited, but you got the same feeling you did every time. The memories came back full force, from playing with barbies with your best friend to sneaking a boy in through your window late at night. The teddy bears, posters of bands and trophies had been put into storage but the bedsheets were the same ones you'd had as a teenager. There was still a cork board above the desk with faded concert tickets, photos and birthday cards pinned to it.

You made your way downstairs, finding your dad in the living room and letting him know you'd make dinner. It was easy, moving through the kitchen again. Every time you'd visited the muscle memory came back. It always stung a little that your mom wasn't there, singing along to the radio as she chopped vegetables, the knife moving in rhythm. She always made up her own lyrics when she couldn't remember the real ones, her version always stuck in your head when you heard the songs again.

Once dinner was ready, you brought the plate to your dad on a tray in the living room. You watched him out of the corner of your eye, the way he struggled with his knife. He didn't ask for help and you waited until he set his cutlery down in frustration before you quietly got up and cut up his dinner for him.

It was only when you were laying in bed later that night that you realized that things like that would be your life from now on. Parents look after their children, then children look after their parents years and years later. It felt too soon to be looking after your dad. He wasn't even retired yet, you weren't even thirty yet. But, life doesn't always go to plan.

In the morning, you thought you were dreaming when you woke up. It took a minute to adjust, to remind yourself you weren't just visiting. There was nowhere else to call home anymore. You took a shower and got dressed before making breakfast, having more small talk with your father. You noticed his shirt wasn't quite buttoned right but elected to ignore it.

“I'm gonna take a walk,” Your father informed you after breakfast. “the air is fre-”

“Freshest this time of day,” You smiled, giving him a nod. “I remember. I'm gonna clean up, is Carla coming today?”

“Tomorrow,” Your father replied, clearing his throat. “She comes on different days each week. She covers a big area.”

“I see,” You nodded, watching your father for a moment before clearing the plates. “Well I got this under control. Enjoy your walk.”

Once you'd cleaned the kitchen, you decided to do the rest of the house too. It wasn't bad, just needed a little sprucing up. When you got to your dad's bedroom you took a breath before walking in. Your mom's things weren't there anymore, they had been put away into storage, but her presence was still there. As you made the bed you thought about all the times you'd climbed into your parents bed after a nightmare, the birthdays and mother's days you'd take your mom a tray, feeling so proud when she told you she loved it.

When you were vacuuming, you glanced out the window and spotted a figure heading into the garage, unable to make them out clearly. You made your way out of the house and over to the garage, the air already feeling hot.

“Hello?” You called, holding your hand over your forehead to shield your eyes as you turned into the garage. “Can I..”

You let out a sigh as you spotted your father leaning over the hood of a truck, lowering your arm.

“Dad, what are you doing?” You asked, walking over and folding your arms. “You told me you were taking a walk.”

“I was,” Your dad nodded, looking over to you as he gestured to the truck. “Then I remembered I had this sitting in here. I gotta get it back by tomorrow, Ed’s gonna need it.”

You took a deep breath, slowly lowering your arms and stepping closer to the truck.

“If it really needs to be fixed by tomorrow, then let me do it.”

“Let you do it?” Your father repeated, a concerned look on his face. “I couldn't ask you to do that.”

“Then good thing you're not asking,” You smiled. I'm a little rusty but you can just give some guidance if I'm going wrong. I didn't spend half my teen years here for nothing.”

“Well, if you're up for it,” Your father nodded, taking a step back. “Give it a whack.”

An hour or so later, you popped the key in the ignition and let out a cheer when the truck started. Your dad stood up from where he'd been sitting, walking over to the window.

“Well look at that,” He smiled, opening the car door for you. “You never lost it.”

“Apparently not,” You grinned, turning off the ignition. “I can drop this over to Ed, if you want?”

“If you want,” Your dad nodded, looking down at his shirt and frowning slightly before looking back to you. “You'd be doing me a favor really. He said he wasn't in a rush but..I don't want to delay him.”

“Okay, I'll drop it over,” You nodded. “I'll pick something up for dinner, too. Do you need anything else?”

Your dad thought for a moment before shaking his head and gently patting the door of the truck.

“I'm all good. I'll let you get off.”

“Alright, I'll see you later.” You smiled, closing the door and starting up the truck. You presumed Ed lived exactly where he always had, and honestly you were a little amazed he was still alive. When you were a child he was about a hundred years old, god only knew what miracle was keeping his heart ticking.

When you were out on the road, you lowered the windows and turned on the radio, enjoying the fresh air as you sang along to the music.

‘So smile for a while and let's be jolly, love shouldn't so melancholy, come along and share the good times while we can..’

When you arrived in town, you drove to Eds's first, parking up outside and looking up at his house. The place hadn't changed in probably 50 years, not so much as a paint job. You took the keys and headed to the front door, pushing the door bell before taking a step back.

After a few minutes, a woman you didn't recognise opened the door and you wondered if you'd somehow gotten the wrong house. She certainly didn't resemble Ed, with her kind eyes, warm smile and curly brown hair. Ed looked like Mr. Magoo on a bad day.

“Hi,” You smiled, gesturing over your shoulder to Eds's truck. “I'm looking for Ed Hicks, I'm dropping off his truck.”

“That thing,” The woman rolled her eyes with a smile. “He shouldn't even be driving it, yet he still gets it dropped for repairs. Come on in darling, he's here.”

You followed the woman inside, heading into a living room that looked like it should have been in a shack in the woods. In the corner, Ed was sitting on an armchair watching the TV, looking exactly as you'd remembered him.

“You got a visitor Ed,” The woman told Ed, raising her voice. “This young lady has come to drop your truck back. Don't tell me you've been driving again?”

“Nope, cross my heart,” Ed patted his chest before looking over to you. His eyes were so pale you were amazed he could see you but he recognised you right away.

“You back at your daddy's then?” Ed asked once you'd walked over and shaken his hand, giving him a nod.

“Yes, I am,” You told him. “He was busy so I thought I'd drop your truck back, needed to head into town anyway. How have you been, Mr. Hicks?”

“Oh you know me,” Ed shrugged, looking back to the TV. “I get by. Still waiting for this one to marry me though,” He gestured to the woman. “any day now.”

The woman laughed affectionately as she shook her head.

“Stop it you, you old charmer. Now I need to get going, you need anything else?”

“I'm all good, you get yourself gone,” Ed waved his hand. “I got my stories.”

You said your goodbyes and left the house with the woman, turning to her as she closed the door.

“I know this sounds a little strange, but your voice is really familiar,” You raised a brow. “Have we met?”

The woman looked at you for a moment before nodding and smiling, folding her arms.

“I was thinking the same thing, we most certainly talked recently. I'm Carla, I'm a nurse, I do a lot of home visits around here.”

“Carla..of course,” You smiled. “I think you look after my dad?” You gave her the details and noticed her face lit up a little as she nodded.

“I certainly do,” She smiled. “So you must be the daughter he's so proud of,” She grinned. “You know I gotta say, it is really admirable what you're doing. If I could, I'd be out at your dad's more but..I can just about manage to hold onto the days I do have.”

The two of you walked down the porch steps and towards the curb, stopping by a little red car.

“You need a ride somewhere?” Carla asked, opening her purse and taking our her keys. “I've got another visit but I can take you somewhere if you need.”

“I just need to go to the supermarket, if that's okay?” You asked, deciding to worry about getting home later.

“Of course,” Carla nodded, unlocking her car. “Hop on in.”

You got in the car and put on your seat belt, looking over to Carla as she started the engine.

“Can I ask you something, if you don't mind?”

“Of course you can honey,” Carla smiled, looking over to you before looking back and pulling away from the curb. “What's on your mind?”

You looked out the window, taking a deep breath.

“My dad..it's bad, isn't it? His condition? Like..I know a lot of people function just fine with arthritis but I've noticed little things he can't do anymore.”

Carla let out a soft sigh, her hand gently touching your arm.

“I won't lie to you darling, your dad's arthritis is severe, in fact..the hospital wants to run more tests just in case he might be developing Parkinson's. You came at a good time, he's going to need the extra help.”

“Yeah,” You nodded, keeping your eyes on the world outside the window. “I think I did. It just feels..strange. How do you do it every day? Look after people, see them become frail in front of you?”

“Well I love my work,” Carla replied, gently squeezing your arm before letting go. “It feels like I'm making a difference. You'll get that feeling, it just takes time. And your dad isn't so frail, he just needs more time to accept his limitations. It hasn't been easy on him.”

“I know,” You nodded, looking over to Carla. “I'm sorry I haven't been around much, but I'm glad you've been looking after him. He can be a little stubborn about accepting help but I hope he hasn't been too difficult.”

“He's been a dream,” Carla smiled. “I know that he's frustrated that he can't do all the things he used to, but he's getting a little better at accepting it every day. The hardest part seems to be work. He keeps telling me he's gonna get back out to the yard and fix up all the trucks but..it's just not possible.”

You nodded before looking back out the window, the familiar sights flashing by.

“I found him by Eds's truck this morning, I told him I'd do it and let him tell me what to do but..I could tell he wanted to be doing it himself.”

“Well that's not a bad thing,” Carla looked over to you. “He may not be able to work himself but if he feels like he's contributing then that might ease the disappointment. Are you a mechanic yourself?”

You smiled to yourself as you shook your head, glancing over to Carla.

“No, I'm a hairdresser. I used to help my dad out in the yard when I was a teenager, picked up some things. I never really thought of it as a job, more just a hobby.”

“Hobby or not,” Carla raised a brow, gently touching your arm. “Might be something to think about. Is here okay to drop you off hun?”

“Perfect,” You nodded, glancing at the window. “Thank you so much.”

“Anytime,” Carla smiled. “I'll be out at yours tomorrow, see you then.”

The afternoon passed by quick enough, you got a coffee in the diner, made small talk with people you knew in another life, went to the supermarket, bumped into one of the neighbors who offered you a ride home. It was like you'd never left, the familiarity sinking into your bones.

Your dad was watching TV when you got home, a sight you never thought you'd see on a warm afternoon. You made your way to the kitchen, trying to ignore the knot in your stomach as you unpacked the groceries and started preparing dinner. You turned the radio on, humming along to the music as you moved about the kitchen with ease. When you were plating up dinner, you felt the knot in your stomach tighten as you got a knife and fork to cut up your dad's food. It was spaghetti, which made it easier to disguise that it had been cut, but you knew you'd have to keep doing it.

You took the plates into the living room, placing a tray on your dad's lap before sitting down yourself.

“How was town?” Your dad asked, picking up his fork and glancing over to you. “Anybody about?”

“A couple,” You nodded, dipping your fork into your pasta and pushing it around a little. “Nobody too exciting.”

“Ah, never is,” Your dad shrugged, looking back to the TV. “Oh turn up the volume, the match is coming on.”

You reached for the remote, raising the volume and glancing over to your dad.

“What match?”

“Wrestling,” Your dad explained, pointing to the TV. “David's making his debut tonight. Should be a good one.”

“Oh,” You raised a brow, looking back to the TV. “I didn't know he was getting into wrestling..does Kevin still do it?”

“Sure does,” Your dad nodded. “He's good too. Reckon he'll be even better now with his brother on side.”

You sat back a little, your eyes watching the screen as the presenter explained the upcoming bout. When it cut to a reporter standing with Kevin and David Von Erich, you couldn't help but smile. They looked so different from when you had last seen them, but they still had that familiarity, a boyish charm.

When David looked down the camera lens and gave a warning to the opponent, you bit your lip slightly, smiling to yourself as your Dad praised him. The match was fun to watch, your dad's enthusiasm made you think of how he was when you were a child, his passion and support for the things he loved shining through. The last thing you wanted was for him to lose that joy, to have things in his life that brought him happiness.

The actual wrestling didn't interest you all that much, but it was entertaining and fun to see Kevin and David show off their skills, raise their arms triumphantly when they won.

“What did I tell you? They got something special there,” Your dad looked over to you. “You know, you should pop over and visit them one of these days. They'd love to see you.”

“Maybe,” You nodded, getting up and placing your tray on the coffee table. “I have things to do so..I'll have to see when I got some time.”

You gathered up your dad's tray, taking the dishes out to the kitchen and resting them on the counter. Taking a deep breath, you closed your eyes and tried to clear your mind, not wanting to give certain memories an outing.

You focused on cleaning the kitchen, taking your dad a beer when you went back to the living room.

“Just the one,” You smiled, sitting down on the couch. “So don't get too excited.”

“I won't,” Your dad laughed, shaking his head. Hell, even if I wanted another one I couldn't. Carla..the nurse,” He corrected himself, clearing his throat. “She can always tell. Scolds me something terrible.”

“Well she's just doing her job,” You shrugged, sitting back against the couch and smiling as you looked at your dad and noticed the slight smile on his face.

“She means well.”

“Mm, she does.” Your dad nodded, picking up his newspaper from the arm of his chair and slowly opening it, his face particularly obscured but not enough to hide his smile.

“Just gotta remember that sometimes.”

“I met her today, actually,” You glanced to your dad as you said it, watching as he didn't look away from the paper but didn't turn the page either. “She said she was coming by tomorrow.”

“Yeah, she will be,” Your dad nodded. “I saw it on the calendar.”

You rolled your eyes with a smile, sitting back and reaching for the remote to find something new.

The next morning, you woke up naturally and stretched slowly in your bed as you glanced to the window. You had left the curtains half open, the warm sunlight filtering into the room. After taking some time to get up, you made your way downstairs and paused in the doorway of the kitchen as you spotted your father sitting at the table reading the paper. It wasn't so much what he was doing but how he looked, with his carefully gelled hair and good brown suit. His shirt was buttoned properly and you felt guilty for wondering how long it would have taken him, if you should have knocked on his door and offered help.

“Morning dad,” You raised a brow, walking over to him and placing a kiss on his cheek. “You're looking snappy. Don't tell me I forgot your birthday?”

“Nah course not,” Your dad laughed softly, shaking his head. “It's just polite to dress for company.”

“Of course,” You nodded, smiling as you put on some coffee. “I'm sure company always appreciates it.”

You watched the machine brew for a moment before taking a deep breath and looking over to your dad.

“I was thinking..maybe today I could take a look at more of those trucks in the yard.”

“Hm? Why would you want to do that?” Your dad asked, and the knot in your stomach returned as you went to put on some toast.

“Because,” You began, popping two slices of bread in the toaster. “I enjoyed it. And-” You stopped yourself from speaking the words you knew your dad didn't want to hear.

‘Because you can't anymore.’

“I need something to keep me occupied,” You continued, looking over to your dad. I'll probably only get started on one truck but I want to dust off my old skills. You didn't teach me to waste them right?

“Right,” Your dad nodded after a moment, lowering his paper. “You're right..if you want to take a look I won't stop you.”

After breakfast you took a shower and got dressed in a simple blue sundress, glancing out the window as you heard a car approach. You smiled as you saw it was Carla's, heading out of your room and down the stairs. Your dad was in the living room, pacing back and forth a little until the doorbell rang and he rushed to answer it.

“Morning sweetheart,” Carla smiled at your dad after he greeted her, the smile on his face wider than you'd seen for a long while. “Don't tell me I forgot your birthday?”

As Carla was running through some medical checks with your dad, you went out to the yard and made your way to the garage. You took a set of keys and found the truck it belonged to before getting into the garage. The radio was turned on, there was some shelter from the already immense heat, and you soon found yourself getting back into the swing of mechanics. A little while later you were under the hood when you heard a truck coming up the drive. You figured it would be a drop off, possibly just a courtesy one. No doubt the whole town knew about your father's condition.

When the truck door opened and closed and you heard multiple voices, you ducked out from under the hood and grabbed a cloth to wipe your hands, immediately dropping it in shock when you saw who was walking towards the garage.

“Oh my god!” You shrieked excitedly, rushing forward and wrapping your arms around Kevin Von Erich when you got close enough. He laughed and gave you a tight hug back, each of you holding each other's arms as you pulled apart.

“I can't believe it,” You grinned. “It's been..well a long time.”

“Too long,” Kevin smiled, his eyes shining. “We were so sorry not to be here for your last visit.”

You waved your hand, smiling as you looked up at Kevin.

“Don't be silly. You big shot wrestlers have busy schedules, I get it. Caught you on the TV last night, almost couldn't believe my eyes.”

“You wouldn't be the only one!”

You laughed as Kevin turned around with a playful frown, your smile growing as you spotted Mike. You gently squeezed Kevin's arm before rushing over to Mike, his arms wrapping around you and swaying with you as you hugged him back.

“You are not Michael Von Erich,” You teased as you pulled back, raising a brow. “you're way too grown up. Look at you!”

“Aw come on I ain't changed that much,” Mike grinned, the tips of his ears growing pink. “It's just been a minute. It's so good to see you.”

“Don't I get a hug?”

You rolled your eyes playfully, giving Mike a wink as you stepped aside and folded your arms.

“I don't know,” You shrugged, raising a brow. “You're a real big mouth hot shot wrestler now, you really need the girl next door hugging you?”

“Yes, right this second.”

“Oh yeah?” You smiled widely as you rushed forward, David's arms immediately wrapping around you and lifting you up as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

When he set you down carefully, he gave you a wink and you gave him one back, stepping back and turning to Kevin and Mike.

“What brings you all over? I know it ain't that truck.”

The Von Erichs looked at each other for a moment before looking back at you, Kevin clearing his throat.

“Well we heard you were back in town, and..that it's more permanent this time. We were sorry to hear about your dad, hopefully he's doing okay.”

You looked at the three men in front of you for a moment, smiling as you folded your arms.

“Damn, word travels fast. Was it Ed?”

“Ed.” They chorused, making you laugh.

“Of course,” You nodded, dropping your arms. “Well I am back, and thank you, my dad's doing well. He's got his nurse with him today so..all good.”

“Hope it's not rude to ask if you want to come over for dinner some time?” Mike asked, resting his hands in his back pockets. “and your dad, of course. Mom keeps insisting.”

“So I really can't say no then,” You smiled. “That would be great, really.”

“Perfect,” David grinned, walking over to you and slinging his arm around your shoulder. “Knew you couldn't resist.”

“How could I,” You grinned, resting your hand on David's back. “I've had your mom's cooking before.”

“Amen to that,” David grinned. “Listen, what are you up to later?”

“You tell me,” You raised a brow, looking up at David with a grin. “Do I need to cancel my plans?”

“Absolutely,” David nodded, looking serious for a moment before grinning. “I'm taking you out for a burger, we're catching up properly.”

So, a few hours and one fixed up transmission later, you took another quick shower before changing into a clean t-shirt and jeans. Your dad was in an extremely chipper mood after Carla's visit, and you promised him you would be back in time to make dinner.

When David pulled up outside the house in his truck you felt like a teenager again, skipping down the porch steps and getting in beside him.

“Right on time,” You grinned, leaning over to kiss his cheek. “That a new habit?”

“Not the only one,” David grinned, turning the truck around and heading down the driveway. “You hungry?”

“Starving,” You nodded, sitting back and turning up the radio a little, singing along under your breath.

‘Go lightly from the ledge, babe, go lightly on the ground, I'm not the one you want, babe, I'll only let you down..’

You smiled as David turned up the radio, the two of you singing together as he drove towards town.

‘You say you're looking for someone, who'll promise never to part, someone to close his eyes to you, someone to close his heart, someone to die for you and more, but it ain't me, babe, no, no, no, it ain't me, babe, it ain't me you're looking for, babe..’

When David parked up in town, you were laughing at some silly joke he'd made, wondering if there would be any moment where you didn't feel seventeen again. You both headed into the diner, sliding into a red leather booth you'd sat in countless times in your life.

“I don't need to look at this, but it feels polite.” You plucked the menu from its metal stand and opened it, smiling as the wave of nostalgia hit you. Your mom taking you for a milkshake after school, hanging out with friends, one order of fries between six of you, and of course being there with the boys next door.

“I don't think you can beat a cheeseburger,” David grinned, sitting back and tilting his head slightly as he watched you read the menu. “I mean why would you not want a classic?”

“To be adventurous,” You teased, putting your menu back. “Try something other than a cheeseburger, chili fries and a coke. Unless you updated your order since we were last here?”

“Hey I know what I like,” David grinned, giving you a wink. “And like you ain't gonna order a chili dog and a strawberry shake.”

“Why would you not want a classic?” You grinned, laughing as David rolled his eyes playfully.

“Fair enough,” He nodded, glancing around the diner and sitting up a little. You were about to say something when two girls appeared at your table, probably just about twenty one. They blushed as they asked David for an autograph, giggling when he winked at them, handing back the flowery notebook.

“You're really famous now,” You grinned, gesturing to where the girls had stood. “you'll have a fan club next.”

“You could be the president of it,” David smiled, resting his arm along the back of his seat. “Give out all the buttons with my face on them.”

“Wow, you haven't thought about this at all, huh?” You teased, sitting up a little as the waitress came over. You both ordered your classics, choosing to let it slide.

“Oh you know who I met yesterday?” You raised a brow, looking over to David. “Nancy Moss, who apparently still hates my guts even though I ain't seen her since high school.”

“She hates you?” David raised a brow. “Nah, she never hated you.”

You shook your head, sitting back and holding your hands up. “She did, and still does.”

“I don't get it,” David frowned. “Why would she hate you?”

"Because of you," You grinned, pointing over to him. "I think she was jealous."

David looked surprised, glancing around for a moment before leaning on the table and meeting your eyes.

"Jealous? Of what? It's not like you and I ever dated. Not.." He cleared his throat, looking a little embarrassed in an endearing way. “not technically, anyway.."

"I think that annoyed her more," You shrugged, resting your arms on the table. "We weren't a couple but I got to ride around in your truck, I was always at your house, you were sneaking into my bedroom at night.."

"You were the one sneaking me in," David held up his hand with a grin. "how would she even know about that anyway?"

You shrugged with a smile, resting your hand on your cheek. "I may have said some things that she overheard, not my fault if she was eavesdropping."

“Oh I see,” David grinned, sitting back and gesturing to himself. “Bragging about me huh? Can't say I blame you.”

“In your dreams,” You rolled your eyes with a grin, sitting up as the waitress brought your drinks. You thanked her before sliding your glass closer, lightly swirling the straw in the thick pink liquid.

“How are your parents by the way?” You asked, taking a sip of your milkshake.

“They're good,” David nodded, clearing his throat and sliding his glass closer. “Thanks. We're all good. You should definitely come by, they'd love to see you.”

“Yeah,” You nodded, lifting your straw and slowly dropping it, taking a deep breath. “I'll definitely try and drop by.”

“Good,” David nodded, taking a sip of his drink before leaning a little closer and reaching out to touch your arm. “Oh you know what? You should come to the Sportatorium on Saturday night, bring your dad. We got a big match coming up.”

“That I can't object to,” You smiled, meeting David's eyes. “My dad will be beside himself with excitement.”

“That's great,” David. “So will you be when you see me do my thing.”

“Oh I've seen your thing many times,” You raised a brow with a smile. “Hope it's as good as I remember.”

When you arrived back home, you felt like you were riding on a high. The afternoon had been easy and fun, you couldn't remember when you had laughed so much. You said goodbye to David and went inside the house, finding your dad in the living room reading the evening paper.

“Hey,” You smiled, walking in and sitting down on the couch. “How was your day?”

“Hey darlin’,” Your dad smiled, setting the paper down in his lap. “It was alright, Carla left that for you,” He gestured to a white envelope on the coffee table. “tried to sweet talk her into letting me read it myself but my charms need some polishing I guess.”

“I'll get you a cloth,” You laughed softly, leaning forward to pick up the envelope. “I don't know why she'd leave me something.”

“I don't either,” Your dad sighed, looking down at his paper. “Anyway, how was your date?”

“Date? It wasn't a date,” You grinned, opening the envelope. “Just two old friends catching up.”

You peeled open the envelope and took out the letter inside, your heart sinking a little when you heard your dad mutter ‘that's right, it was the other one.’

“Oh this is nothing, just her contact details in case of an emergency,” You smiled, folding the paper back up. “I'm gonna freshen up then start dinner.”

“Alright sweetheart, take your time.” Your dad nodded, picking his paper back up as you left the room, holding the envelope to your chest.

You made your way upstairs, heading into your bedroom and sitting on the end of your bed. Taking a moment, you let out a breath before taking the letter back out from the envelope. Technically you hadn't lied, Carla's details were indeed on the letter, just written above the rest of it. As it turned out, your father would have to be taken into hospital the following week for some tests, and Carla felt (accurately) it would be better to tell him closer to the time, but didn't want you to be surprised.

Once you had carefully folded the letter back up and hidden it in your room, you went to the bathroom and splashed some water on your face, trying to push the thought of hospitals from your mind.

A couple of hours later, you placed a tray on your father's lap and sat down on the couch, looking over to the TV.

“Oh I forgot to say, I got some invites for you,” You smiled. “David invited us next door for dinner, and he's gonna get us tickets for the match next Saturday.”

“You're kidding?” Your dad held the remote in mid air as he looked over to you. “In the Sportatorium? Well, I'll be damned. You thank that boy for me won't you? I can't believe it. Oh just wait til I tell Earl.”

You laughed softly, picking up your own tray from the coffee table and setting it on your lap.

“I wasn't sure about dinner at theirs,” You began, taking a breath. “We don't have to go if you don't want.”

“Don't be silly,” Your dad looked over to you, setting the remote on the arm of his armchair. “Of course we can go. Fritz and Doris are old friends, and good neighbors. Why wouldn't we..” He stopped himself, looking back to the TV and letting out a sigh, his hand moving to his neck.

“I uh..I believe not all the boys still live at home. Some of ‘em went off, training..”

“I see,” You nodded, keeping your eyes on the TV and trying to keep your heartbeat steady. “In that case I'll tell David we'd be delighted.”

The week seemed to pass slowly, not that you objected. You spent most days out in the garage working on the various cars and trucks, finding yourself enjoying it more and more. Sometimes your dad would come out and give you instructions you didn't need, but followed anyway. You cooked, cleaned, made sure your dad had his good clothes for when Carla visited. You watched his eyes light up when she laughed at his corny jokes. She called you sweetheart and thanked you at least three times for a cup of coffee. You went into town, you noticed people stopped asking how long you were visiting for. Everyone sent their regards to your father.

One evening you and your dad visited the Von Erichs for dinner. It felt like old times instantly, your dad and Fritz putting the world to rights while Doris insisted you didn't need to help with the dishes but gave you all the gossip when you did. Kevin told you about a girl he was seeing, and you already couldn't wait to meet her. Mike invited you to a gig, and you promised you'd go. David constantly took the seat next you and made you laugh so much you ached.

The evening after, you had gone into town with Kevin and David to meet Pam, Kevin's girlfriend. You adored her instantly, the two of you clicking right away. You hadn't intended to get drunk, but you were having a good time and the drinks kept appearing and you didn't object. When one of the bars you visited was having a karaoke night, you and Pam were up on the stage before the alcohol-induced confidence could fade.

‘Look into his angel eyes, one look and you're hypnotized, he'll take your heart and you must pay the price, look into his angel eyes, you'll think you're in paradise, and one day you'll find out he wears a disguise, don't look too deep into those angel eyes’

By the time Mike came to pick you all up, you were wrapped around David to steady yourself, the world spinning on a loop. You struggled not to fall asleep on the ride home, resting your head on David's shoulder and focusing on the feeling of his hand on your shoulder.

When you got home, David took you inside to make sure you got to bed safely, your eyes closing the second your head hit the pillow.

“I had fun tonight,” You murmured softly, turning onto your side and letting out a sigh. “tell me ‘m fun.”

David laughed softly beside you, his hand gently touching your hair. “You're very fun. And a heck of a lot more.”

“Yeah?” You sighed softly, pulling the blanket up a little. “Then..then why wasn't I enough for him?”

“Hey,” David’s voice was soft and made you want to sleep. “don't be worrying about all that, you hear me? That's all over now. It was all just..a misunderstanding. You need to get some sleep, I'll see you tomorrow.”

By the time Saturday came around, you were feeling pretty good, greeting your dad when you went into the kitchen for breakfast. You could have sworn he hid some of his paper but couldn't be sure, there was no reason for him to. You moved about the kitchen getting breakfast ready, unable to shake the feeling your dad was hiding something.

You waited until he went to get dressed, looking under the table and finding a slightly scrunched up piece of newspaper on the floor. You picked it up and smoothed it out, trying to see what would be so offensive. Heatwave incoming, American athletes to withdraw from the Olympics, Cowboys win game, nothing to write home about. You left the paper back where you found it before cleaning up the kitchen, your suspicions melting away.

The evening came around quick, and you were looking forward to seeing the match. Your dad seemed a little quiet, to your surprise. He'd been so excited all week, now when it was time to go he didn't seem as enthusiastic. You didn't push it, especially when he didn't say anything about it.

The Sportatorium was already bustling with activity when you got there and parked up, feeling excited for the night ahead. You went in with your dad, finding your seats and smiling when he seemed to relax more.

It was halfway through the match when you saw him.

At first you thought you were just seeing things, imagining it. Imagining him.

But he was there, sitting in the front row with Mike, cheering on his brothers.

You felt your heart sink into your stomach, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath. You could hear your dad cheer beside you, the crowd going wild as a body slammed down on the mat.

You watched the rest of the match and refused to look anywhere else but the ring, wanting to run away more than anything.

When the match ended, you told your dad you weren't feeling well, needing to get out of the arena as quickly as possible. You felt like you couldn't breathe until you got into your truck, wanting to crawl into your bed and forget the world.

Your dad gave an enthusiastic debrief on the way back home, and you felt guilty for not sharing his excitement. When you got home you went up to your room and leaned against the door for a moment. You felt sick, your heart pounding in your chest. After getting ready for bed, you opened up the wooden chest at the end of your bed, rooting through it and eventually pulling out your last high school yearbook.

Taking it into bed, you opened the book and looked through the photos of your old classmates, smiling at some of the quotes, laughing at the others. You flipped to the back of the book, where your friends had written messages on the white pages. You traced your finger over them, smiling to yourself until you found it.

There it was, in black and white.

‘I love you now & always, can't wait to spend forever with you ❤️ KVE’

“Fucking liar.” You muttered, slamming the book shut and flinging it down to the end of your bed.

The following morning you didn't want to leave your bed, a restless night leaving you exhausted. You reluctantly got up and got ready, already dreading what was to come. You went downstairs and met your dad in the kitchen, the two of you heading out to your truck.

“I know you hid something from me,” You told your dad as you started your truck. “I wasn't sure why at first but now I know. And I'm grateful, but I can't avoid him forever. He's back, I saw him last night. He's going to be there today, and we will talk to him because we are good neighbors, and I don't want to embarrass you by causing a scene.”

Your dad was quiet for a moment, and you could feel your heart racing. Eventually, he silently reached out and took your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“I'm proud of you sweetheart, always will be,” He murmured softly. “You can do this.”

When you got to church, you wanted to be anywhere else, especially when you spotted David's truck. You walked into the building with your dad, putting on a smile and making your way up the aisle. You spotted the Von Erichs right away, giving them a polite nod as you walked by, feeling your stomach drop as you realized the only free seats were in front of them. Your dad walked down the pew first, your heart racing as you felt eyes on you. You sat down, almost anticipating a hand on your shoulder, blue eyes burning into yours.

The service seemed to last forever, you wanted desperately to just turn and run, feeling trapped like a deer in headlights. When the reverend finally ended his sermon, you followed your dad outside and made polite conversation after polite conversation. Eventually you couldn't put it off anymore, and you found yourself with the Von Erichs. You felt like they were all looking at you like you were about to attack, electing to put on your brightest smile and stepping closer to Kerry.

“Well hey stranger,” You gave him a hug, feeling him hesitate for a moment before he hugged you back and the familiarity could have killed you. “It's so good to see you again.”

You pulled away, taking a step back as your dad greeted Kerry, your hand hammering in your chest. David gave you a reassuring smile and Kevin subtly squeezed your arm. After some small talk, you made your way to your truck with your dad. Neither of you said a word until you were back home and in the kitchen. You'd gone to put on some coffee and burst into tears.

Your dad immediately wrapped his arms around you, stroking your back and holding you close.

“It's okay darlin’,” He murmured, letting out a sigh. “Your mama wasn't shy with the truth, and you know how she knew things about us we didn't even know? She knew all about you. She told me, and I'm sorry I wasn't there for you.”

“It's okay,” You whispered, pulling back and wiping away your tears. “It was a long time ago. I just..I just want to forget about it.”

“Alright darlin’,” Your dad nodded, letting out a sigh. “Come on, you need some rest.”

He refused to listen to your protests, taking you to the living room and draping a blanket over you as you got on the couch. You wanted to insist you were fine but all you could do was wrap the blanket around yourself and close your eyes.

You were dimly aware of noises around you, your dad reading the paper, the radio playing in the background. A dog barking in the distance. At one point, just as you were drifting between sleep and wakefulness, you could have sworn you heard voices in the hallway.

‘Please sir, I just need to talk to her.”

‘It's not a good time right now.’

The next day, you went out to the garage after breakfast and focused on fixing things you could salvage. Your dad hadn't confirmed your suspicions there had been a visitor the day before, and you didn't ask. Part of you wanted it to be true, and you hated yourself for that desire.

The sun was high in the sky when you heard footsteps approaching, reaching for a clean rag to clean your hands.

“Almost done, I'll be in to make lunch in a second.”

“Hi.”

You took a deep breath as you heard the voice, clutching the rag in your hands before turning and seeing Kerry standing at the entrance to the garage.

“Why didn't you just drive over?” You asked, tossing the rag aside and walking back to the truck in the middle of the garage.

“I wanted some fresh air.”

“Well now that you've had it you can go home,” You sighed, feeling your hands tremble slightly. “Sorry to make you waste a trip.”

“I'm not going anywhere,” Kerry told you, walking closer. “I need to talk to you.”

“Who says I want to talk to you?” You sighed, keeping your eyes on the engine.

“Please just let me explain,” Kerry sighed. “You see, I-”

“Explain what?” You interrupted, stepping back and looking over to Kerry. “That you're sorry? You never meant to hurt me, you wish you could take it back, you've lived in regret, blah blah blah. Bullshit. Save your breath.”

Kerry was silent for a moment, keeping his eyes on you before he looked away and nodded.

“I understand that you're upset, but-”

“Oh, you understand,” You scoffed, placing your hands over your heart. “That makes me feel so much better, you understand. If you understood then you wouldn't have done what you did. You never even gave me an answer, you know that? One minute we're planning our future, you're telling me you love me, we're forever, we're going to start a new life. The next minute I'm standing right here waiting for you and you never show. Then I hear you're gone. You're with her and you're heading off to start a future with her. How the fuck could you possibly understand how I feel?”

“David,” Kerry replied. His tone was soft but there was a hardness in his eyes. “That is how I understand. I thought that was all over between you, then I heard you two got back together after our graduation. I took it as you choosing him over me, I had to protect myself.”

“Am I seriously hearing this?” You laughed, shaking your head. “Some idiot told you I was with David and you just believed it?”

“Can you blame me?” Kerry muttered. “Not like you didn't have previous. I wasn't gonna sit around waiting for you again.”

You felt something inside you snapped, and you stormed over to Kerry with a fire in your eyes.

“How dare you say that to me?!” You snapped. “As if you ever sat around waiting for me, don't make me laugh. I was the one sitting around waiting for you to open your eyes.”

“Oh yeah?” Kerry frowned, his voice raising slightly as he stepped forward, his tone growing harsh. “Was this before or after you fucked my brother?”

You took a deep breath, holding Kerry's gaze.

“Don't you dare, Kerry Von Erich, throw that in my face. You never fucked anyone? Not my best friend, not every girl that was throwing herself at you? And not that it's any of your fucking business,” You held your hand up. “But the only reason David and I started doing anything was because you had stood me up again and he was consoling me. I have been in love with you since I was thirteen years old, and I thought I was destined to be your friend forever. If I couldn't have you then David was the next best thing. But I couldn't officially date him because I knew you'd never want me then. Then I did get you, I finally fucking got you and you saw me, and I..”

You stopped yourself as you felt tears welling up, trying to push them away.

“I couldn't believe my luck, I wanted to believe that we could be together forever, you made me feel so loved and so safe and happy then you just ripped it all away. I..I can't deal with this,”

You stormed past Kerry, the tears fully flowing. He called after you, tried to grab your arm but you pulled it away. You could hear him following you, trying to talk to you. You blocked it out, heading up the porch and into the house. Heading into the kitchen, you got yourself a glass of water and tried to calm yourself down.

“Please just let me explain,” Kerry pleaded behind you, fresh tears welling up in your eyes. “I swear I never meant to hurt you.”

You set your glass down, turning around and taking a deep breath.

“I don't believe that. If you didn't want to hurt me you would have just left, but you left with someone else. You left with my best fucking friend, so don't tell me you didn't want to hurt me.”

You walked past him, heading to the living room and freezing on the spot when you got there.

“It's not what you think,” Kerry sighed as he approached. “I can explain if you-”

He looked at you before following your gaze.

You felt like time stood still as you ran across the living room and dropped to your knees, your dad lying unconscious on the floor.

“Dad,” You gently shook his shoulder. “Dad it's me, wake up. Come on, wake up now..”

You felt panic set in as he didn't respond, holding your hand to his hot forehead.

“Dad..please wake up, you're not leaving me. Come on..”

A few minutes later, Kerry appeared by your side, dropping to his knees beside you.

“I called an ambulance, they're on the way,” He explained, gently touching your back. “He's going to be okay, don't you worry.”

“How can you know that,” You murmured, closing your eyes as more tears filled your eyes. “What if I've lost him too?”

“Hey, don't say that,” Kerry wrapped his arms around you and you didn't object, sobbing into his chest. “He's going to be fine,” Kerry whispered, stroking your back. “It's not his time yet, you got him for a whole while longer.”

“I'm still mad at you, you know,” You muttered, taking a shaky breath. “But thank you.”

Everything seemed to happen in a blur. You only remembered clinging to Kerry as paramedics came into the house and got your dad into the ambulance. You held his hand on the ride to the hospital, your head buried in Kerry's shoulder.

Being back in the hospital waiting room felt like a nightmare. You wanted to be anywhere else, wanted to run away from it all. When Kerry went to get some coffee you wanted to beg him not to leave, but couldn't. When he came back you accepted the coffee with a grateful nod.

“I think we should talk,” You sighed softly, looking over to him. “I don't need another thing hanging over my head. So..just tell me why you left?”

Kerry looked down at his cup for a moment before looking back at you and giving you a nod.

“Alright let's get this out there. I know that I wasn't perfect, far from it. I swear to you that I had no idea how you felt about me, if I had even suspected you saw me as something other than a friend then..”

He shook his head, laughing softly.

“I wouldn't have been such an idiot. I was crazy about you but I thought you saw me as more like a brother. So I thought I should just date anyone else, try and get over you. Then you and David started hanging out more and I really thought you weren't interested in me. So I just wanted anyone else as a distraction, I was so angry at David for stealing you even though you weren't mine to steal. I would hear you laughing in his room and it would kill me, I just wanted to know why you chose him over me.”

You took a sip of coffee, your heart aching in your chest. After a moment of silence you took a deep breath and looked over to Kerry.

“Why didn't you just come to me when you heard that stupid rumor that me and David were together again?”

Kerry looked up for a moment, letting out a sigh before looking back at you.

“Honestly? I didn't want to hear you confirm it. It would have killed me. I shouldn't have believed it, but I did. I thought you had realized I wasn't good enough for you and I just wanted to get away. So when the opportunity came up I took it.”

You wrapped your hands around your cup, letting out a soft sigh.

“And my best friend?”

Kerry shook his head, clearing his throat.

“That wasn't anything. We fooled around a little at a party. I was just desperate to get the thought of you being with David out of my mind. She asked if she could come with me when I was leaving but we went our separate ways when we got there.”

You went to reply but stopped when a doctor walked towards you. You reached your hand out to touch Kerry's, hesitating for a moment before he took your hand and gave it a gentle squeeze.

As it turned out, your dad was indeed going to be fine. He had suffered a minor heart attack, and while he was to be kept overnight for observation, he would make a full recovery.

“Don't say I told you so.” You looked over to Kerry when the doctor left.

“Never would,” Kerry held his hand over his heart. “I promise.”

You took a deep breath, looking up for a moment.

“I should go see him. I was so scared I wouldn't be able to.”

“Go on,” Kerry smiled softly. “I'll be here.”

You made your way to your dad's ward, finding his bed and letting out a shaky breath when you saw him. He was still with you, still breathing. You sat down beside the bed, touching his hand.

“Thought you were gonna leave me too,” You murmured softly, watching his chest rise and fall slowly. “I would have brought you back to life and killed you again for doing that to me. I should've known you'd pull through, you're too stubborn to go this soon, right? And you got a lot more to pack into this life. Asking Carla out, for one. You think she's going to be won over by the jokes? You need to woo her, she'd be good for you.”

You stood up, stepping closer to the bed.

“I'm gonna be right back here in the morning, okay? You're in safe hands. I love you so much.”

You leaned down and placed a kiss on his forehead before pulling back with a smile and heading back to the waiting room. Kerry was still waiting for you, and you tried not to feel too pleased about it.

“I think I'm gonna head home,” You sighed softly, sitting back down beside Kerry. “I'll come back in the morning, I don't really want to spend the night trying to sleep in one of these chairs.”

“Fair enough,” Kerry nodded. “I can call Kev, get him to give you a ride home.”

“Okay,” You nodded. “Thank you.”

“And by home I mean our home,” Kerry took your hand. “You think I'm gonna let you spend the night alone in your place then you got another thing coming.”

Any urge to protest faded away, you nodded and watched Kerry go to phone Kevin to pick you up. You let out a breath, looking up for a moment before smiling to yourself.

As it turned out, it was exactly what you needed. Kevin came to pick you up, and very kindly agreed not to tell anyone about your dad. He brought you back to the Von Erich household and any fear you had about things being awkward melted away when Kerry and David seemed to be on perfectly normal terms with each other.

The boys played football and you cheered them on, feeling a lightness settle over you. When Kerry and Mike won they grabbed you and lifted you up like a trophy, your laughter filling the air as the sun dipped lower in the sky.

You ate dinner and helped Doris with the dishes and sat half on Kerry's lap when you all watched TV, his arm around your waist. You felt as if the last few years hadn't happened, you were back where you'd always felt happiest.

When the time came to go to bed, you insisted Mike didn't need to give up his bed for you, feeling guilty when he insisted he would. You wouldn't sleep anyway, knowing Kerry was in the bed across the room. You stared up at the ceiling for a while for a while before throwing the blanket off and getting up.

You padded across the room before you found yourself standing by Kerry's bed. He was awake too, looking up at the ceiling before he turned and his eyes met yours, the light of the moon making them seem even more blue.

“Can I get in?” You asked, smiling a little as Kerry immediately moved over and pulled the blanket back for you.

“Couldn't sleep either?”

“No,” You sighed softly, getting into the bed and laying down with your back to Kerry. He moved the blanket over you and kept his hand by your shoulder for a moment before pulling it back.

“Today was..a lot. Just feel like I need to come back down to earth.”

“I get you,” Kerry murmured softly. “Sometimes you just need something familiar.”

“Well this certainly is,” You raised a brow, smiling as you felt Kerry's hand near your waist. You reached down and pulled his arm around you, relaxing into his touch.

“I can't remember how many nights I slept in this bed.”

“Enough to make us experts at keeping quiet,” Kerry laughed softly.

“I know,” You smiled with a groan. “Oh poor Mike..did he ever find out I was sneaking in here?”

“Nah,” Kerry murmured softly, wrapping his arm around you a little tighter. “Sometimes in the morning he'd ask if I got up in the night or he'd tell me I talk in my sleep. I never corrected him.”

“Well I'm glad we really could keep quiet then,” You murmured softly, turning over and meeting Kerry’s eyes.

“I never said but..thank you for being there with me today. I know I didn't say the nicest things to you, and I stand by them, but..I really appreciate what you did.”

Kerry smiled and gently stroked your waist, giving you a slight shrug.

“Don't mention it, honestly. You would have done the same for me, and..no matter what happened between us I still love you, I'll always love you.”

“I'll always love you too,” You smiled softly. “We both did stupid things, we both ended up right back here. I'm sure that means something but I don't want to think about it too much right now.”

“That's okay,” Kerry smiled, letting out a breath. “It's been a long day, why don't you get some sleep.”

“I will,” You murmured softly, glancing down for a moment and taking a deep breath. “But I need to do one thing first.”

You leaned in closer, closing your eyes as your lips pressed against Kerry's. For a moment you worried he wasn't going to kiss you back, but your heart soared when he did, his arm pulling you closer.

In the morning there would be a chat about the future, you would have to bring your dad home from the hospital, carry on with normal life.

But, the night was young enough to not worry about all that, and you planned to make the most of it.

#the iron claw #the iron claw fanfiction #the iron claw fic #kerry von erich x reader #jeremy allen white

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bengiyo · 1 month ago

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Love in the Big City Eps 5 & 6: That Apartment Was Too Small

I’m late this week to write this post. Despite everything going on in the world and in my life, I have struggled with how similar episodes 5 and 6 played like Part 3 of the book. When I read over my reaction post for Part 3, I felt like I could post it with a few edits as a reaction to these two episodes. I’ve also read so many great posts about this section, so I’ll throw some quick thoughts down on some of the things that stood out in this section.

The T-aras Continue to Be a Great Change

Presenting the drama in a more linear format required baton passes between the sections that the book didn’t require, and I really loved having the T-aras as pallbearers who also took care of Yeong when he wanted to go out the night of his mom’s funeral. I love how they also feel like they’ve matured as they’ve gotten older.

Making us love the T-aras so much makes their flippancy about being around someone they know, or suspect, is positive hit like a ton of bricks in the flashback. What’s so sad about this is it puts this wall up inside of Yeong that keeps him from ever telling them about his situation with Kylie. We know the T-aras love him dearly, and I think they would have adapted quickly to take care of their friend. I couldn’t help but think about the hospital scene from Part 2 and wonder how uncertainties Yeong felt about them complicated that moment for him.

I also love that they’re the ones who got to meet and approve of Gyu-ho, and that they suggested Yeong take him on a trip to help rekindle the romance. Yeong not being completely alone has been one of my favorite changes, because few of us are ever as alone as we think we are.

Gyu-ho Feels so Alive

We see so much of Gyu-ho from Young’s perspective in the book, and I loved seeing him come alive and share space with Yeong in the drama. I loved seeing the mundanity of their relationship. I loved seeing Yeong consolidate and clean up the room to make it livable for Gyu-ho just as much as I loved seeing them struggle with their living habits. I loved seeing them fight over little things, and then seeing Gyu-ho adapt to that and cover annoyances (especially with the water bottles).

Unfortunately, Kylie ruins so much of Yeong’s ability to commit to this relationship, and I think it’s why staying in Mi Ae’s apartment might be one of my favorite choices of the drama. When we read Part 3, I kept thinking about how small Young’s apartment was, and how it didn’t seem right for the two of them to stay there. Here in the drama, we see that Yeong’s mom made sure to take care of her affairs, and I wondered at how much Yeong had stashed away from that, but also figured he wouldn’t want to stay in the home his mom had.

I think, for Yeong, Gyu-ho is just so radiant and beautiful a person that Yeong is worried he’ll infect with HIV and make “dirty.” He brings that word up a lot, and it made me so, so sad. Kylie is everywhere in their relationship. It’s in Yeong’s need to fake a blood test to get a decent job he hates. It’s in his inability to pursue work opportunities in other countries. It’s in their inability to have unprotected sex without worries. All of this culminates to make Yeong feel like he’s ruined Gyu-ho’s future for just being with him.

Conversely, it’s so frustrating to watch Gyu-ho from this perspective doing everything he can to make Yeong feel loved and valued. I felt so much for Gyu-ho when he got a solid job as a nurse and wanted them to get a bigger place together. I also felt for Gyu-ho searching for potential new partners on the apps. It sucked in the book and it sucks here when Yeong tries to shove Gyu-ho to go have sex with someone else when that’s not what Gyu-ho wants at all; he’s a romantic.

As such, they could not make this relationship work. Gyu-ho is probably the one person in the series we’ve seen Yeong trust to the most. The T-aras prickled his shame. Mi Ae outed him. Yeong Su turned out to be gross. Nam Gyu died. I believe Yeong when he said he was writing as hard as he could to build a future where he was independently wealthy enough to take care of himself and Gyu-ho, and it was so sad to see him completely lose the love he found in the present for that.

Onto the Finale

That’s all I’ve got this week. I find myself looking forward to this section because I’m so excited to see what Habibi turns into with this version. I’ve meditated on the fallout of the Gyu-ho breakup, and I’m excited to see what the drama does with that.

#Ben watches #Ben writes #love in the big city #litbc book club #korean bl #bl series #lgbt tv

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kankuroplease · 6 months ago

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could you do an Hc of Sena please, he's the only one left 😆 I would like to understand why he would have preferred to be the only child and why he dares to hit little Mika 😫 I don't forgive him even if he is rather beautiful 😑... in short, by the way I really like your art I live for it 😍lol, and the little aburame are adorable I think their glasses are stylish 🤩

He is the chaotic neutral sibling that has a LOT of red flags 🚩

A fussy baby but nothing new to his parents, they’d just wrap him a little tighter and soothe him with back pats until he relaxed/calmed down.

He never really got along with his siblings (the triplets) as their personalities clashed and he often wasn’t allowed to get his point across before their parents intervened

Unlike Leonie’s aloof demeanor towards the comments about their shared skin condition, Sena found it extremely annoying to have it mentioned

So he fought those kids

Unlike Mika, who was the “perfect” son, he seemingly couldn’t do anything right/kept making mistakes

“You should follow Mika’s lead” was a common phrase he heard and that was extremely annoying

And Mika trying to extend him his help just angered him more, so he would fight with him because there’s no way Mika couldn’t see that he was treated like the “golden” child while he (Sena) was the “problematic” child

Having so many siblings felt suffocating; Asahi always had his friend around, Kuri was like a second mother, Frederick was overzealous, Leonie was always clinging to Mika, and Mika could do no wrong. So by the time Elke was born, he was over it.

He just wanted to leave

And he took every opportunity to push his luck and travel further and further away from home as child

First it was leaving the house as a young child without asking

Then it was going to the end of the village

Then it was crossing the river

Then it was camping out overnight by himself in the forest

That one actually got him in trouble and lectured by his father and made his mother question why he was behaving like that

They’re his family, he can talk to them and tell them anything

Sena simply said he was unhappy being one of many and wanted to leave

After the shock wore off and his mother told his father to go somewhere (because he was trying to argue with a child), his mom said that she really wanted him to be happy and she can understand his want for independence

However, she needed him to stay. He has his whole adult life to wander wherever he wants. He even has family he can meet back in their homeland, but he shouldn’t run from things just because they’re a little hard

So with a pinky promise to not hold him back once he was old enough AND to let him stay at grandma’s 3 days of the week

With that, Sena got some alone time which allowed him to breathe and grow an appreciation for his time with his siblings

Because Ebba had him working HARD jobs for trying to sass her

He trained under his grandmother’s guidance and has a natural with ninkens around town, often times getting them to obey his orders

It wasn’t until he was a pre-teen that he accepted his own ninken companion which was given to him by a wolf

Like “where’d you get the pup?” “A she-wolf” “oh.. wait, whaaaat?”

His popularity grew as he got older, with his previous aggression morphing into him becoming aggressively confident and more sociable

His white forelock proved to be a great ice breaker with the ladies and if that failed, their was Mika’s adorably oblivious self that made a great wingman

He learned he had a sliver tongue that could talk his way out of most situations and if he couldn’t, a little space seemed to cool people off

True Communication was never important to him as he never felt a need to go that deep or express every thought he had

Sometimes he just craved solitude to clear his head. Sometimes the weight of everything was too much and he’d shut down if he didn’t get that space from the situation

He was the teen that was always coming home late and sometimes not at all, that would joke his way out of trouble with his parents

A little bit of a playboy. He had multiple girlfriends and they all would argue over him/with him because he gave them the same sweet words

He fully accepted he was a jerk in most cases. Tell him something he doesn’t know he just didn’t care to people please

As much fun as he was having, he was also bored of the same old routine and told his parents it was time for him to go

Which of course they tried to protest, but he reminded them that while young, by societies standards he was a man and they had said he could venture out when he was old enough

Besides he had Shin (his ninken) to keep him safe on top of being the only kid they had to complete Ebba’s shinobi training

He wouldn’t die and if he did, just know he died doing something he’s longed to do.. plus they had 7 other kids to wipe their tears

He didn’t have a send off but he left everyone a letter stating he was going to the land of fire to see what all the fuss was about

And he did end up there eventually, after a few adventures of wandering around

He even ran into Arashi and his husband on a pirate ship. Little bro grew facial hair and saved his ass 😅

Once in the land of fire, he was pleasantly surprised by how different it was

He knew where to find the Uchiha’s and his uncles thanks to his mother, but he didn’t really make himself known to them

He was more interested in checking out the Inuzuka clan/visiting his aunt Meiko

It was there that he caught the most alluring scent he’d ever smelled and it was coming from the most wild woman he’d ever seen (Tsume)

Freshly home from a mission hosing off her ninken while talking excitedly about the upcoming festival with her comrades

She commanded the area and her eyes pierced right through him when they met his. Looking him up and down with a curious stare

And just as he was about to say something, she blast him with the hose

Giving him a wolfish smile and coy shrug before she and her comrades burst out laughing at his stunned face

It took him a moment to snap out of his daze, but he chuckled and simply said “thanks, I needed that” before carrying on with his day

His nice jacket drenched, shoes squeaking every so often, and once fluffy hair weighed down with water stuck to his forehead all made him smile

She’s feisty. He likes that.

He tried to pry information out of his aunt about the the wild haired brunette, about this heigh, modest bust, tight ass, boisterous, and really fuckin’ hot girl he had the pleasure of getting sprayed by

But she smacked the back of his head for saying those things and told him to keep it in his pants up least that girl rip it off him if he tried anything (rightfully so. The horny bastard)

he was causing quite the scene with the Inuzuka women because he really knew how to entertain (thanks Kuri, Frederick, and Mika)

The Inuzuka men appreciated his crude humor and tales of the lands he’s seen

But none of that brought him any closer to the one girl he wanted to get to know

However he was confident that he could at least get to talk to her at the festival, so he made sure to pay a visit to the one man he heard of that he knew for a FACT would have access to some impressive Yukatas

(Uncle) Tenko

And he was right! (Or his mother was right about her brother being a flashy man). Even in his older years, his extravagant lifestyle was evident

Tenko asked him about what took so long for him to show himself (his mother only sent him a letter every two months asking if he’d visited Konoha yet) and Sena didn’t really have a good reason other than not wanting to have live up to a name he doesn’t even possess (the Uchiha name)

No hard feelings though, If his nephew needed his help impressing some young thing. He would help him

A nice black Yukata with all the trimmings was all his. Oh and that girl he’s raving about? Sounds like, Tsume.

He could be wrong, but go ahead and tell her half of those descriptive words he used to her face

If he gets a swift knee in the balls, that’s definitely her

With that information and his outfit he went in the festival on a mission: don’t piss her off

When he found her at the festival, she was just as radiant as ever, standing like she boss she was

He could barely think over the music and his own heartbeat, but he did manage to properly introduce himself

She was clearly a bit tipsy as she hummed aloud and asked her Ninken should she introduce herself to this bastard before sticking her hand out and saying her name

“It’s Tsume~”

Her handshake was firm and she pulled him closer to whisper she knows he’s been asking about her before playfully walking her fingers up his chest before pushing him back

She told him to accompany her and he jumped at the chance

She bought a dog collar from a stall and half jokingly told him it’s his as he’s her guard dog for the night (he put it on and barked, shocking her for a moment before they both laughed)

The evening was full of laughs, odd questions to get to know each other, lots of play fighting, and falling over every other thing as they drank more and more. It was perfect to him

He wanted to get to know her better and wanted her to get to know him

He was ready to stay somewhere for once without wondering what else was out there

And when Tsume and him grew closer, he started thinking about how this is what they call love

She pushed him and he loved that

She was perfectly rough around the edges

She liked hearing about his travels before coming to Konoha

They found it fun to compare traditions of the Inuzuka there versus his home town

When he found out that they would be parents, he was excited

When he held Hana, he felt so much joy

He looked like her mother but she had his eyes. His perfect little one

He could hold her all day

Then the peace was shattered and suddenly he understood why his parents wanted out of the land of fire

He tried talking to Tsume about packing up and coming back to his country

She didn’t want to leave her people and insisted he should fight for them and his daughter too

It was around this time he pulled his first disappearing act to clear his head

He really was just off in some inn thinking of what the right thing to say or do was. Maybe even cry a little

It wasn’t for long, but long enough that Tsume and him got into a big argument

His irresponsibility was surfacing and creating a wedge between them

The fought, made up, things would get difficult and he’d need to “clear his head” again and the cycle would repeat

with each time becoming a little longer than the last

He didn’t want to make her mad, but he lost the ability to make her as happy as he once had

Eventually, they learned that they were expecting another child and while he was excited. Tsume was not.

She knew his pattern by then and they were in a rough patch; meaning he was likely to pull a disappearing stunt AGAIN the moment another argument broke out

But she gave him a warning; if he disappeared on his family again, he might as well do it for good. She couldn’t keep doing this and the kids deserved reliability.

In a much happier au, he’d get his mess together and communicate properly with everyone. Staying for his family and mend his relationship the Tsume because he truly loves her. Watching Hana and Kiba grow up first hand

Following the regular timeline, Tsume and him would get in a big argument when she finds out that 1. He hasn’t even told his family about their children 2. He’s withheld crucial information about who he is/who he’s related to

Which leads to him storming off in the night and her shouting at him that this was no longer his home or family

He barely got to even hold Kiba or bond with him and that keeps him up some nights

He sees the kids every time to time, with Hana clearly remembering him and telling him how likely her mom is to rip off his face if she catches him talking to her

And Kiba sort of flies right past him without knowing it’s him when he’s in town

Tsume isn’t quite as angry with him anymore, but she doesn’t think he’s a good influence for their children nor that he should just be able to drop in and out of their lives when it’s convenient for him

He ends up settling back into his home country with none of his siblings knowing about the family he made/lost

Keeping the pictures he has of the kids and Tsume and his younger years together in an album in keeps in the closet

His father knows and is very disappointed in him (which, fair. He’s disgusted with himself too)

Mika and Leonie feel like he’s hiding something, but at the same time he tells them it’s not up to him if/when he’ll be able to tell them his story. He respects someone’s (Tsume’s) wishes too much

He knows he doesn’t have a right to bother her anymore, but he still wants her/what they could’ve had

He’s selfish and he knows that

He was lucky once and he fucked that all the way up and he knows it

But still

#ask #my art #tw suggestive #OC: Sena Inuzuka #kpz naruto founder au #Tsume Inuzuka x OC #tsume inuzuka #knfau 🖼️#kpz pack 🐺

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signsofthegods · 2 months ago

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Hera is more than just the nonchalant suburban mom some of yall paint her for.

Hera is just as much an old queen in New York picking up stray queer kids and giving them a place to stay.

Hera is in the women putting on a full face for a 16 hour shift in a dementia unit and comforting confused and frightened people who think they’re 11 and can’t find their own mom.

Hera is the first in line at ANY right for marriage rally. She doesn’t care if you’re marrying six people or just one person of the same sex, she is there.

Hera is in the “Did you eat?” No? Here, have this.”

Hera is in the older siblings help dress their younger brothers and sisters for the day, for the ones who have stepped in for their parents to get away for a night or who have stepped in permanently.

Hera is woven into the fabric of handfasting ties and hides between the stones of wedding rings, promising the same good blessing to each band from Kay Jewelry and Walmart.

Hera is in the mom splitting the dollar cheeseburger from McDonald’s with her toddler in the backseat when that’s all they can afford.

Hera is in the quiet moment you embrace your spouse(s) after a long day, just holding each other and relishing in the warmth.

Hera is in the kind hearted folks who pick animals off the street and take them home, nourish them back to plump little things rather than skin and bones.

Hera is in promises of any kind, from childhood pinkie swears to vows on an altar.

Hera is in waitresses, nurses, customer service, any pink collar job that takes the blunt load of the shit in people’s days.

Hera is in the rural women across the globe whose back doesn’t break under the weight of physical labor and family needs. Her hands watch over the backs that do.

Hera is the mom fighting for silent dances, better ramps, bus accessibility and equal opportunity for the disabled children who are so often left out.

Hera is in the women in beat up jeans and dirt who wish for the days their hands were delicate enough for nail polish.

It is with great respect that we should regard the Queen of the Gods, mother to all and protector of humankind.

#hera #worship #deity #hellenistic polytheism #neopaganism #neopagan #devotional

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supermarioterrarium · 3 months ago

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Hi, everyone. I know this is, uh, not typical for me, and I would prefer not to for lots of reasons, but I am kind of desperate right now.

I have been struggling for years to hold an in-office job. The past few I've tried for, I've experienced multiple severe panic attacks on the way to, at, and returning from work, and have been forced to quit or been fired, with the most recent incident being this past September. Recently my docs have diagnosed me with agoraphobia (in addition to the already-known depression, anxiety, and being on the autism spectrum), which they think I've been suffering from for a long time without realizing.

I've applied for help from the state, and for short- and long-term disability, but none of it is in effect yet. I've been trying to doordash to make enough money for rent and other costs this month, but that's been stressful because of the uncertain amount, as well as.. driving around to places and people I don't know. It's been very difficult. I'm also applying for as many remote roles as I can find, as newly-listed as I can. Lots of these roles are fake and/or already inundated with hundreds of applications. So this has been difficult as well.

My family is, at least right now, unable to support me through this. But I really, really don't think I can survive losing my apartment. It is my space. I do not have uninvited eyes on me here. I am free to be myself. If I am forced to move back in with my mom, or worse, to become homeless, I will lose my safe place. I will lose the space where I'm comfortable being loud and silly in my friends’ Minecraft RP server. I want to recover on terms and at a pace that will help me rather than hurt me, and find a remote job that suits me. And I am afraid that I won't make it that long. I am afraid I will not make it past this month.

I do not know what the best avenue for this is, and I worry that I'm asking without having really earned the right to, but I need to ask for your help.

Between doordash and whatever money you can part with, I need to make around $1100-$1200 USD in order to pay my bills and rent.

Please do not feel obligated to contribute. Please also do not contribute if doing so would put you in any financial trouble. I do not want you to sacrifice your well-being for mine. Any help that can be provided is extremely appreciated.

Additionally, if anyone has any leads on legitimate remote work – I have a great amount of experience in clerical and administrative roles in a number of industries (law, insurance, education, etc.). If you know of any opportunities, please, please let me know!

#emergency #disability #agoraphobia #depression #anxiety #diabetes #autism #neurodivergent #fundraiser #gofundme #rent #utilities #please help if you can

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girlishwhimsies · 1 month ago

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unfortunately i have to yap more on the economic divides.

just there are so many implications and complications when it comes to generational wealth vs cycles of poverty. cycles of poverty my beloved in fiction and beloathed in life

i yapped a lot in the tags of my last post so read those too but i will be yapping so much here too!!! the way it affects familial relationships consumes me, two bits father leaves and suddenly now his mom has to go work and she sure as hell can’t get a great job cause she’s a greaser so she probably doesn’t have much education and she’s an asian woman in the 60s!! she’s now a single mom with kids to take care of. so she ends up working as a waitress or something similar and uses that money to scrape by, food stamps were starting to become a thing in the 60s as well so she def used those. and then she has two children. she can’t get them through college and two bit knows he has to step up and be the man of the house and that means finding some way to make money so he has to drop outta school cause he needs to get a job. that’s what greasers do and that’s what was always gonna end up happening to him. the cycle didn’t start with him or end with him but it has to keep going l

ace and steve too. bounced around to different homes, never having one home with a steady flow of income, having to find ways to get through it. ace who didn’t trust any men, especially when money was involved, and only trusted those close to her!!! the cycle of poverty hits them all again as her and her brothers can’t rely on a father to bring in income. god plus the way that poverty creates addicts due to the stress of it all and then addiction further fuels poverty since you have to buy your vices. some addicts can’t hold a steady job which makes it even worse. all cycling in on itself over and over again. and that’s not even mentioning the clear redlining that tilly mentions in her ace backstory (this may even be a whole other post tbh) the town is designed to keep the poor poorer and the rich richer.

johnny who in my mind is clearly food insecure (y’all saw the way that boy snatched that food from dally and hid it away immediately right) never quite sure where he is gonna get food from besides the curtis’s since his parents spend most of the money on alcohol. the anxiety that would bring him and it impacts his story so hard cause he always is at a disadvantage due to that. there is a reason that boy looks so small

dally has always travelled, choosing to steal to get what he needs cause he never stays long enough anywhere to get a full job. he’s been labelled a hood since day one anyway and wouldn’t get a great job anyway cause of his skin color so he decides to lean into it and do what he has to do to get by.

then we have the curtis brothers. who were so close to getting out of tulsa. they were able to try to break the cycle and send darry off to college after he was one of the first to get through high school and make it out just for him to have to come straight back. no matter how hard darry tried he couldn’t ever end it but at least he can try to get pony through school and get him a better job that he can succeed in and love comfortably with

more various thoughts i couldn’t fit into any one greaser story- a lot of the kids were most likely mistakes and/or teen pregnancies that they really couldn’t afford to have but had to go through with it anyway. the cycle of addiction that runs through these families. the parents hopes and dreams of getting out never getting fulfilled. the way race plays into poverty as well

then you have the socs who have all the money they need, who have the opportunity to get out and choose not to take it cause tulsa is a source of pride for them. they benefit from the cycle too even if the kids don’t always realize it. just ugh. the way all of it comes into play with the overarching story

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fyeahdprian · 13 days ago

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youtube

DPR IAN on how the "inhumane" K-pop industry intensified his dissociative identity disorder

SBS The Feed December 10, 2024

DPR Ian - or Christian Yu - is one of the few Australians selected to become a K-pop idols. He launched from a life of music and metal in Australia's Wollongong to idol stardom when he moved to Korea on a whim and was scouted to join the hugely successful K-pop group C-Clown. He's now independent and creating a new blueprint for the industry with DPR - the Dream Perfect Regime collective and his videos (which he edits himself because the guy can do everything) amas millions of views. But it's been a whole ride to get here.

-----

Ian: That's actually me switching. That's not me acting because you feel it. You know when you're going to switch because you feel it. I can't do it on command.

DPR Ian is one of the few Australians selected to become K-Pop idols. He launched his life of music and metal in Australia's Wollongong to idol stardom when he moved to Korea and was scouted to join the hugely successful K-pop group, C-Clown. He's now independent and creating a new blueprint for the industry with DPR, the Dream Perfect Regime collective. And his videos, which he edits himself because the guy can do everything, amass millions of views, but it's been a whole ride to get here. Welcome home. Ian: Thank you.

I'm really interested in your determination to move to Korea and that period of your life. What was your life in that? Were you planning? How did you prep for that?

Ian: At that time, I was like, I better really just take a plane and head over to Korea. No plans. And I just told my mom, "I'm going", and she's like, "just get into uni first". So I got into uni. But, then my mom was like, you've got to save money yourself. I did a gig handing out pamphlets at the time.

Oh, the promotional. Gig?

Ian: Yes.

Yeah, I've done that.

Ian: You've done those?

Hundreds

Ian: You did that too. Oh. My. Lord. I mean the money's great. I can't believe you did that too. Yeah, it's weird. I remember one term, it was like a chocolate and I had to dress up as a chocolate.

Was it like a bar? Chocolate bar?

Ian: Yeah, I was avoiding any eye contact with people that I knew.

Ian: Luckily I got the money saved up and went to Korea. And it was a rough journey because I didn't know nothing about Korea. And I remember the first few months I got scammed. I lost all my money and I had to stay at these saunas. You don't sleep there, you don't stay there. But I had to stay there. I didn't want to tell my mum that I failed in the first three months of going there. I told her, I was like, "I'm going to get a job". And she's like, "if nothing happens in the two months, you have to come back". I was scouted in the street and went into the trainee days, idol days.

So you managed to stay a couple more months. And those months where the opportune months that kind of changed your life?

Ian: Apparently so.

[MUSIC] "Yeah. This is how the world plays. Yeah, this is how the world plays.

Ian: Immediately they put me into the training rooms. I met all the other trainees and all that. This was bit weird.

[MUSIC] Hey, what's up everyone? We are C-Clown.

And what was the training schedule.

Ian: For us back in the days? Very strict. Wake up like five, head to the studio. Practice, practice, practice. If you're late a minute, you have to kneel on the floor and you have to sit in the corner like time out, and you'd go back home, 1:00 AM, 2:00 AM 3:00 AM and then you just repeat that throughout the whole week. It's a lot better now. That's what I hear. But back in 2010s 2012s, it was at its peak era of do you have slave contracts? It was just so shady, but getting the backhand of that just did something to me. It's a pretty intense process. Oh man. I thought it was inhumane, but that's literally the life that trainees live.

Yeah, well a lot of people really want that.

Ian: Oh my god. They don't know. See, I didn't know that either. You don't know what that gruesome and grueling side of that life is because no one really tells you. You just think, okay, "the minute I'm an idol, it means it's an immediate success", which is not the case. But you have all these other hidden layers of groups that don't even make the cut line and there's about a hundred of them.

You've chatted a bit about your bipolar and your dissociative identity disorder. For people who don't understand that experience, how would you explain it to them?

Ian: Well, I don't even know where to start. For example, DID, it's like disassociating yourself. So it's kind of waking up in a new body, new mind, new likes, new dislikes. It's kind of living with I think another you that is completely separate from who you identify as a person. For me anyway, personally, I never really get a choice of when that takes a turn and you just keep going back and forth from that person. If you decide not to show people your most vulnerable side, you would have a choice to not show it.

Right. I see what you're saying.

Ian: But I never really got a chance to not show it. I'll switch out. I would all of a sudden be, I'll be doing something as somebody else. And it would feel like when I come back, I wouldn't really understand what I did or who I was or none of that. So it would be unbelievable.

Ian: I knew what I was doing when I started naming it. His name is Mito. You should never just name your personas or your altars. That gives it so much more power. But the thing is, for people that are going through it, you can't tell them not to do that. So the first time I showed Mito to the world was a music video called So beautiful. That's actually me switching. That's not me acting because you feel it. The reason is, you when you're going to switch because you feel it. It's not, I can't do it on command. Now what happens with the DID is, if you can't associate yourself with an emotion and it's something that you want to go further away from, you'd create an area in your mind that you'd run to. It's okay in the beginning, but the more and more you're faced with trauma, the minute you feel it, you're out. So it's no longer like I'm going to go back. It's like your body's immediate response to just open the door and kick you out. So I didn't know that. So I didn't know that during my idol days. I just thought this is the only way I can cope with it. The only way. So I just kept doing that.

Well, you have DPR now.

Ian: Yes, I do. Apparently. Shame.

Good to know. What do you want to take from that experience?

Ian: I think. Being an idol taught me what I shouldn't do. There wasn't really an independent show for artists. Because we had to follow a systematic, or a system, in order for us to make it or get there. But I wanted to break that. I just wanted to show people that you could be very genuine with what you do artistically and still have an audience.

Ian: My name is DPR Ian and I'm back home. Thank you. Guys.

#2024 #video interview #interview #2024 interview #christian yu #dpr #dpr ian #dream perfect regime #dream reborn tour 2024 #drwt #Youtube #mito #cclown #did #so beautiful

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sjsmith56 · 19 days ago

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Unfinished Business - A Private Man, Chapter 26

Summary: Tracey and Janice go missing, leaving Bucky to call in some extra help to find them.

Length: 5.9 K

Characters: Bucky, Tracey, Janice, Rhodes, Daredevil, Spider-Man, Tracey’s dad, Tracey’s former neighbour.

Warnings: Profane language, violence causing injury, racist and misogynist insults.

Author notes: Tying up a loose end with Janice’s ex and Tracey’s former neighbour getting their just dessert. Divider by vecteezy.com.

<<Chapter 25

That final week of 2024 was the week Bucky put his official notice in at the docks. He never betrayed Rick's revelations to him about the future of the jobs at the docks. Having worked for the man for a year and a half he had faith that the manager would make sure everyone there was given an opportunity to continue on where they were needed. Matt Murdock came out to the docks on Monday, December 30th, had lunch with Bucky, and agreed to represent John Walker, promising to make sure the man was given every chance to redeem himself. Bucky took the opportunity to ask if Matt was interested in becoming one of the Avengers. A smile creased the lawyer's face before he shook his head.

"No, I think I do better dealing with issues on my own," he replied. "I work too much outside of the law when I'm dealing with some of the lowlifes I've had to take on. If you ever need me to have your back though, just call."

"My offer to treat your injuries still stands," said Bucky. "Witch hazel is great for bruises and inflammation, especially if you wrap a cloth soaked in it around the injury. That's free advice."

"I'll remember that," smiled Matt, then he put his hand out. "It's been a pleasure helping you. You're a good man."

"So are you," replied the super soldier. "I'm leaving the docks, now that the Avengers are going ahead. Tomorrow, January 2nd and 3rd are my final days. You still have my number?"

"Yeah," replied the lawyer, standing up. "I do." He leaned down and spoke to Bucky in a voice that was low enough that only he could hear it. "The Power Broker. Is she on your radar?"

"She might be if she gets out of line," he replied. "Why?"

"She provided some crucial information that was passed on to Colonel Rhodes, but it came with the proviso that the Avengers stay out of her business. I think he agreed to her terms. I'm not an Avenger and if she ever sets her sights on my beat, I won't ignore it."

Bucky smiled and nodded. "No, you're not an Avenger. She doesn't know about you. Be careful around her. She was on the good side once and knows how to exploit that."

With a nod Matt stood up, unfurled his white cane and left the café. Bucky finished his lunch, paid the tab, and headed back to finish out the day. While he was finishing some paperwork, he received a text message from Tracey.

T: Just heard from my mom. My dad signed the divorce papers. She can sign them this afternoon at the lawyers. Their house has sold. She's finally free.

B: Good to hear. What a good way to end the year.

T: She also let slip she's going out New Year's Eve with Rhodey to some Washington party. Said not to expect her home until the 2nd of January.

Bucky remembered the talk with Rhodes about his intentions on Christmas Day. Something told him that Janice was the one determining how their relationship progressed, which was fine by him.

B: He's a good man. I'm sure he'll use protection. 😉

There was no response for a time, and he wondered if he had stepped over a line, until he got her reply.

T: I better have the talk with her, just in case. 😜

He laughed out loud when he saw it, loving Tracey just that much more. He sent her a kissing emoji as his reply and got back to his paperwork. By the time he got out of there the weather had turned nasty. Running a little faster he arrived home a little earlier but was surprised to see Amina still around but neither Tracey nor Janice was there.

"Oh, Mr. Bucky, you're home," she said anxiously. "Mrs. Janice called to say she had car trouble. Mrs. Tracey went to get her but that was an hour ago. Neither one has called, and they don't answer their phones. I didn't want to leave Mrs. Rebecca on her own but I'm sorry I have to get home to my children."

"Did Mrs. Janice say what kind of trouble?" he asked.

"No, but I don't think it was anything bad," said Amina. She looked out the window. "Perhaps it has to do with the weather. Mrs. Tracey didn't think it would take her long to get her mother."

"Okay, you go ahead and go home," he said. "I can call you a taxi, if you want. I don't mind paying."

Amina agreed and a taxi arrived within ten minutes, which considering the weather was fast. After he gave the driver enough to pay for her taxi Bucky began to wonder if something else had happened. He phoned both Tracey and Janice, with neither answering their phones. He called Janice's lawyer and learned she had signed the divorce papers that afternoon and was planning to drive home right after.

Rebecca, who had been napping when Bucky arrived home woke up and came out of her bedroom. She could tell immediately that he was worried.

"Why don't I go next door?" she suggested. "I can stay with Tom and his wife while you go look for them."

"Okay, let me call him," said Bucky. "Something's not right. I can feel it."

After helping her over to the neighbour's house Bucky called Chris Brandon, the officer he had dealt with several times. He explained what was going on and asked if there was any way he could help him find his wife and mother-in-law.

"Officially, no," he replied. "Someone has to be missing for a full day before we become involved. But as one law enforcement officer to another I can maybe get a trace going on their cellphones and see if we can locate them. Are you giving me permission to trace their numbers?"

"Yes," agreed Bucky, giving him both phone numbers.

It was about ten minutes later when Brandon phoned back. "Both phones have been traced to a location in an industrial area. I've already sent a unit over there just to see but it's going to take them some time to get there because of the weather. I would like to give you the location of the phones, but you can't just go in there guns blazing."

"What aren't you telling me?" demanded Bucky. "Please, Chris, Tracey is pregnant and if anything happens to her, I'll be a lot harder to deal with."

"Walter Steinhauer, the man who stalked her, was released on bail Friday," said Brandon. "His cell mate at the Metropolitan Detention Center who paid the $100,000 bail, was Martin Harris, your wife's father. He got out last month. I understand your mother-in-law was divorcing him."

"He supposedly signed the papers this morning," said Bucky. "Janice signed at her lawyer's office this afternoon. If the women's phones are at the same location, they must be together but why are they in an industrial location? It doesn't make sense. Look, I don't kill anymore, Chris, but I can't sit by and let either of those men hurt these women if they're involved. I'll call a friend for backup and if those men are holding them, they will be alive when you arrive to take them into custody, I promise."

There was a long pause before the police officer answered and gave Bucky the address of the warehouse. Immediately Bucky hung up and dialled Matt Murdock, giving him the address and the details.

"Matt, the men have to be left alive," said Bucky. "I promised. But I need you to back me up in case one of them tries to hurt either Tracey or Janice."

"I will," said Matt. "I can be there in 20 minutes."

"Okay," said Bucky, "I'll meet you there."

Quickly, Bucky changed his clothes, putting his gear on, and bringing a couple of knives with him. Then he began running towards the industrial area where the warehouse was. He went his top speed, not wanting to waste any time getting there. Right away he saw the SUV. Brushing the snow away from the window and peeking inside the vehicle he saw two cell phones, presumably the women's. He scouted the perimeter of the building determining the best way in. His cell phone vibrated, and he took it out of his pocket, seeing it was Rhodes.

"Hey," he answered with a grimace. "What's up?"

There was a pause. "You tell me, you usually answer with your name. I've been trying to phone Janice, but she doesn't answer."

Busted. He sighed. "Janice and Tracey are in trouble. I think her ex and Tracey's stalker joined forces to take them. I'm at a warehouse in northwest Queens, waiting for my backup."

"I'm on my way," said Rhodes.

"No," cautioned Bucky. "It will take you too long and he's not exactly legal."

"Bucky, don't tell me he's that vigilante from Hell's Kitchen."

"Okay, I won't tell you," replied Bucky. "We won't kill them. I don't do that, but the police are delayed because of the weather making the streets unsafe. He was close and he's willing to help."

"Then you call Peter," said Rhodes. "If he's there with you I can make a plausible case that it's a legitimate Avengers mission." Bucky didn't answer. "Buck, please. Don't go off the books on this. You'll set us back a long way if you go rogue now."

Bucky sighed. "Alright I'll call Peter but if it looks like either of the women are in jeopardy, I'm going in. I won't wait."

"Fair enough," said Rhodes. "I'm still coming but I'll take a portal. Your friend, he wants to remain anonymous?"

"Yeah, please," answered Bucky.

"Okay, call Peter now."

Rhodes hung up and Bucky called Peter, just telling him to get over there as soon as he could. When Murdock arrived, Bucky was aware of the smell of his aftershave first before the vigilante appeared beside him, wearing an outfit with a mask that concealed his entire upper face.

"Slight complication," said Bucky. "My Avengers boss called, and I had to tell him the truth. He wants this by the books. I had to call in Spider-Man for official backup."

"Peter? No problem. We know each other. I represented him before when he was accused of killing Mysterio."

"He knows about you?" asked Bucky.

Matt grinned. "His spider sense is very good," he replied. "He figured it out quickly." He nodded towards the warehouse. "Anything?"

"Yeah, they're in there but I haven't heard anything since I got here. With Peter we can come at them from different directions."

Within minutes Peter arrived. With a grin he greeted Matt. "Hey Mr. Murdock, how's it been?"

"You know, saving the world, one false accusation at a time," he replied. "You're here to make this a legitimate Avengers operation. Do you know what we're up against?"

Peter looked confused. Bucky shrugged. "I just told him to get here as fast as he could. Tracey and Janice are being held by a guy who was Tracey's stalker, and her dad, who's not a very nice man."

Suddenly all three men stopped as they each heard something from inside the warehouse. Recognizing the sound of a man angrily yelling, Peter webbed up to the roof while Bucky and Matt prepared to enter from a doorway. Bucky tested the door and found it was unlocked. They both slipped in silently.

Inside the warehouse, both women were tied up with zip ties, sitting on a pile of pallets. Martin Harris, a big burly man with greying hair was pacing back and forth, his face twisted as he spewed verbal venom at Janice.

"My signature on those papers means shit," he said. "You're mine and you're going to stay mine, till death us do part, just like the vows."

"Dad, by now the police have been notified and they're going to come looking for us," said Tracey, keeping her eye on her former neighbour Walter. "Not to mention my husband."

"Your husband," he sneered. "That killer? You married the Winter Soldier, a fucking assassin!"

His face was right in front of Tracey's as he screamed the words at her. Then he slapped her twice, one of them with the back of his hand that rocked her and brought blood to her mouth. Walter put his hand up tentatively, seemingly shocked at the violence of her father.

"Don't hurt her," he protested. "I'd never hurt you, Tracey. You know that. I just want to take care of you."

"You helped him, Walter," stated Janice, her eyes steely. "In the eyes of the law, you're just as bad."

Marty hit Janice with his closed fist, knocking her over to her side. Tracey looked anxiously at her mother, noticing she was dazed. Then she saw a shadow flicker near a set of offices and suddenly felt calm, somehow knowing that it was Bucky.

"What a coward you are," she said to her dad, distracting him. "You're pathetic, you know that? Tell me, did your first wife actually die or did she leave you?"

"You know nothing about her," said her father. "She was a good wife, never talked back, never challenged my authority, always followed my lead. Not like this bitch. Every time I had to discipline Janice she deserved it."

"Sounds like you treated both women like a dog," said Tracey. "I can't believe you think that's what marriage is."

Suddenly, Bucky was there, standing between her and her father as he raised his hand to strike her again. "I can't believe you think it's okay to lay a hand on a woman," he said, then he noticed Walter trying to back away. "Don't you move, Walter. You already know how strong I am, and I was gentle with you before. You try to leave and you're going to get hurt."

"I didn't hurt either of them, I swear!" whined Walter. "It was all him. When he found out I was Tracey's neighbour he came up with this plan. He made me pull some wires from his wife's car so it wouldn't work. He knew Tracey would come to get her."

"You fucking blabbermouth!" yelled Marty as he made a move to hit Walter.

He didn't even get a chance as Matt tackled him from behind and began punching him. Walter made another move to leave, and a web came down from the ceiling, wrapping itself around him as he struggled against it. Bucky allowed Matt to deal with Marty as he kneeled in front of Tracey, cutting through her ties.

"I'm okay," she said gratefully. "But I think he hurt Mom. See to her."

With a nod, Bucky shifted his focus to Janice, cutting her ties. She fell forward limply, barely responsive, and he picked her up, carrying her towards the office where he knew a high countertop was. Laying her down on it he quickly examined her, calling her by name. Tracey followed him and took over.

"Call an ambulance," she said, after taking a closer look at her mother's pupils. "I think she has a concussion."

Bucky pulled his cell phone out and went to the door that he and Matt entered. He looked out just as Rhodes came out of a portal. In the distance he could hear a police siren. Pointing inside for Rhodes' sake he made the call for the ambulance and told the dispatcher to tell the police he had located the missing women, and the men who had abducted them. Heading back inside he left Janice with Tracey and Rhodey, entering the warehouse portion where Matt had finished with Marty as Peter bound him with a web.

"Police are almost here," he said. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," said Matt. "Abusers like him almost always don't hit back when someone stronger faces them. I probably broke his nose, but he'll be alright. How's Janice?"

"I've called an ambulance," replied Bucky. "Tracey's concerned." The sound of the siren was even closer, and Bucky put his hand out to Matt, knowing he had to get out of there to avoid questions. "Thanks."

"No problem," said Matt, then he looked at Peter. "Spider-Man, nice to see you."

"You too, Daredevil," replied the young man, as Matt disappeared, leaving through a doorway away from where the police approached. He looked at Bucky. "You want me to stay?"

Bucky nodded. "Yeah, I'll let the cops know you're guarding them. Remember, I'm the one that beat up Marty when he tried to attack Walter. Thanks."

Returning to the office Bucky waited at the door then identified himself to the approaching officers as an Avenger, doing the same for Rhodes and letting them know Spider-Man was guarding the suspects. As one of the policemen went in there the other approached where Janice was, watching as Tracey kept monitoring her.

"You call an ambulance already?" he asked. "Who did this to her?"

"My father," said Tracey. "She just signed the divorce papers at the lawyer's office this afternoon. He had someone pull some wires so her car wouldn't start, making me come to get her. When I arrived, he and the other guy, who had been previously arrested for stalking me, got into my vehicle, forcing us to drive here." She gave a ragged breath then looked at the cop. "I think he was planning to kill her and give me to the stalker."

"Why are the Avengers here?" asked the officer.

"She's my wife and the other is my mother-in-law," said Bucky. "I knew something was wrong when they weren't home on time and pulled some strings to find out where their phones were. I called my boss, Colonel Rhodes, and Spider-Man for backup. Her dad is a violent man. We got here just after he hit both women and tried to attack his accomplice when he disagreed with the violence. I may have hit him back a bit too hard."

"Understandable," replied the officer. "I'll just go and check on the other two and get Spiderman's statement."

"Who was that with you?" asked Tracey, in a low voice, when the officer was out of earshot.

"Matt," whispered Bucky. "I'll tell you more later."

The two officers came out with both men, covered in web debris and their hands cuffed behind their backs. Marty sneered when he saw Rhodes.

"You again," he said. "You've been fucking my wife, haven't you? You fucking ni...." Without hesitating Rhodes punched Marty in the nose, bringing out a yell of pain then a demand from him. "I want him arrested for assault!"

"What assault?" asked the first cop. "You insulted the man and his lady, and he defended their honour."

"I haven't been with your ex-wife," said Rhodes, standing in front of Tracey's father. "But I'll tell you something. When she's ready I'm going to treat her like the queen she is, and I guarantee she won't ever give you a second thought. You're a loser, Harris. You had a beautiful wife and daughter, and you treated them like shit. Now you get to do some real time. Good luck with that."

The officer pulled Harris out and a whimpering Walter followed behind them, escorted by the second officer. Peter was right behind them. Bucky looked meaningfully at Rhodes who grinned slightly.

"Yes, I like her a lot," he said. "We agreed not to do anything until her divorce was finalized. Your mom is an amazing woman, Tracey. I can see where you get your best qualities from."

At that moment the ambulance pulled up and the paramedics took over assessing Janice. Since she was still dazed, they wanted to take her in to be assessed for a concussion. Tracey gave Bucky the car keys while she asked to go with her mother to the hospital. Remembering her phone was in the SUV he ran out to get it for her before she left. Rhodes leaned over Janice and gently touched her cheek.

"We'll meet you at the hospital," he said softly. "You're going to be okay, and Marty will never lay his hands on you again."

"James," she whispered, then smiled at him.

After getting the name of the hospital Bucky kissed Tracey goodbye and looked at Rhodes and the young Avenger. "Do you need a ride home, Peter?" he asked.

"No, I'll go home the way I got here," he said. "It would take too long by car for you to drop me off then go back to join Mrs. Barnes and Mrs. Harris at the hospital. She'll be okay. They're both strong women. They remind me of my Aunt May."

"Thanks for backing me up," said Bucky. "I appreciate it."

"Anytime," said the younger Avenger. "See you."

With a leap they watched him shoot out his webs in the falling snow, still amazed at how easily he could do that. Getting inside the car both men took a deep breath before Bucky started it up and began driving. Neither said anything for a good five minutes then Rhodes looked at the super soldier.

"How do you do it?" he asked. "I wanted to pummel Marty when I saw how Janice looked. Then he opened his mouth and I wanted to kill him."

"It's hard sometimes," replied Bucky. "I'm a protective guy, always have been. But I'm also very aware that with just one punch too hard I could lose all credibility in the eyes of the public. Right from the moment I turned myself in after the Battle of Earth I've repeatedly told people that I don't kill anymore. It's the price I have to pay to stay free and be able to look the people I love in the eye. Having Tracey with me helps. She's such a gentle caring person. So is Janice. I think you were right about them having the same qualities. Maybe that's how she coped with that beast of a husband. You meant what you said about Janice?"

"Every word," answered Rhodes. "I sacrificed all sorts of relationships to the work and now here I am at 56, partially paraplegic, alone, and there's a beautiful woman who likes me and makes me feel good. I'm going to do all I can to hold on to her and make her feel like she's special every day."

"You're 56?" asked Bucky. "You should be looking to start slowing down."

"I will, once I get the Avengers up and running properly," he said. "You're what, 110?"

"108 in March," smiled Bucky. "But everyone tells me I don't look a day over 40. I figure I have another ten to fifteen years in me of being an Avenger. By then our kids will need to have a dad that can be around more. With most of my settlement in investments I can probably step back and be there for them."

"You'll be a good dad, Buck," said Rhodes. "I know the younger Avengers already look up to you and I've heard some good things about your volunteer work at the newcomer centre with the kids there. In fact, we're writing in volunteer work as a requirement to be an Avenger in the future. It's why Sam and I talked about you being in a leadership role. What you've come through in your own life is inspiring, it really is."

"I don't like being put on a pedestal," replied Bucky. "You know I tried to talk to Karli Morgenthau, tried to tell her how she was handling things wasn't the right way. She called me old. Said I should sit it out. Makes me wonder if Ross tried to get her and her followers."

"He did," stated Rhodes. "She and her followers were his first targets. Thought he could buy them off like mercenaries. She wouldn't have it and it made her even more militant. The man was so single minded. Couldn't see how his actions made things worse."

"He's still unrepentant, isn't he?"

"Yeah, still thinks there's a way out of this for him. All it takes is a different man in the White House who agrees with Ross to give him a pardon and he's back in business. That's why this version of the Avengers has to work. If Ross ever gets out and regains his influence, we could be back at square one."

It was a warning that both men took to heart as they arrived at the hospital. Checking in at the reception they were routed to the correct cubicle in the emergency room, where Janice was on a gurney, looking better but with a terrible bruise forming on her face. Tracey hugged Bucky when they entered as Rhodes went directly to her mother.

"How are you?" he asked, concern etched on his face.

"My head and neck hurts like crazy," replied Janice. Gingerly, she touched her jaw. "This is going to keep me away from the New Year's Eve party. I can't go out looking like this."

"Then we'll stay in," he said, smiling fondly at her. "It was just an excuse to show you off, you know. They can wait to see the prettiest woman of my acquaintance."

She smiled and blushed, taking his hand in hers. Bucky looked at Tracey, an idea forming in his head.

"Is there dancing at this party?" he asked Rhodes. "Old school dancing?"

"Yeah," replied Rhodes. "You want the tickets? There will be some big wigs there. Might want you for a few photo ops as many of them are fans of yours. You can stay at my apartment."

"Are you sure you want to go?" asked Tracey. "I would have to get something nice to wear."

"That's not a problem," said Bucky. "I just had an urge to take you out dancing."

Her shy smile settled it, and Rhodes gave them his apartment key, choosing to stay in Brooklyn with Janice, expecting her to be released soon. Bucky called a service for Janice's car to be picked up and taken to the repair shop. When Janice was released, they all went to the SUV, and he drove them home. After going next door to get Rebecca, Bucky took Tracey out to buy a dress before the stores closed. They made some dinner, and the four of them had a relaxing evening.

The following day Bucky worked at the docks in the morning. When he got home after making a brief stop, he and Tracey packed an overnight bag then requested a portal to Rhodes' apartment in Washington, staying in his guest room. When they got ready for the New Years Eve party Bucky pulled out a black suit, and shirt, both of them made of a very fine fabric. Tracey was surprised at the sight of it.

"When did you get that?" she asked. "I've never seen it."

"It was a gift from Shuri," he said. "Thought it would go better with your new dress than my grey one."

Bucky had received a haircut on the weekend and went to shave but Tracey stopped him.

"Leave it," she said. "I like it when you have a little bit of stubble."

Pulling her into his arms he kissed her on the lips, then moved down to her neck. He could smell her perfume and he pressed his face into the soft skin.

"I like it when you wear that," he whispered. "It's Beautiful, isn't it?"

"You should know, you got it for me," she smiled. "Every time I wear it, I can hear your voice calling me beautiful."

"It's because you are," he said. Then he let her go. "We better stop, or we'll never get to the party."

Backing slowly away from him, Tracey undid her robe, revealing the daring underwear she was wearing. He watched as she took her dress off the hanger and stepped into it. Turning her back to him he came over and did up the back, stopping to kiss her neck and smell her perfume again.

"Damn, you look even better in it than when you tried it on," he whispered. "Hold on a moment." Retreating to his dress jacket he pulled a small box out and brought it over to Tracey, opening it to reveal a pair of diamond stud earrings. "I picked these up today before I got home. Wanted something for you to wear that went with the dress."

"Bucky, you didn't have to get me these," she said, gently touching them. "They're much too expensive."

"Just in case I don't tell you enough how much I love you, you can look at these and know how I feel every time you wear them," he said, kissing her again.

"You're a beautiful man," Tracey whispered. "I know that just with how you look at me. Thank you."

He watched as she put them on, then finished dressing himself, earning a compliment from her on how stylish he looked. Pulling his phone out he called an Uber and picked up the tickets on the kitchen counter. When their driver texted them that he was there Bucky helped Tracey on with her coat and they stepped out into the night air. Their driver did a double take when Bucky got in.

"You're Bucky Barnes," he said. "Wow. Would you mind if I took a selfie with you behind me?"

"Go for it," said Bucky. "Just get us to the hotel in one piece and on time."

The driver snapped the picture and put the car into gear. There was a long line of taxis, limousines, town cars and other ride services dropping off passengers at the hotel. When they got to the door a doorman opened their door and offered his hand to Tracey as Bucky got out on his side. He took Tracey by her hand and began to walk in. Right away they were noticed, and photographers began taking photos of the couple, calling on them to stop and pose. Ignoring them just like everyone else they stepped inside and were directed to a coat check for Tracey's coat. From there they joined the line of people into the event, handing the doorman their tickets and being directed to their table. Two other couples were already seated, a Department of Justice lawyer and his wife, and a Marine Corps chief warrant officer with his wife. After introductions were made Bucky got up to get himself and Tracey a drink. The other two men joined him, and they waited in line at the bar together, chatting amiably. Bucky couldn't help but notice their attention go to his left hand, but he said nothing. Finally, the chief warrant officer raised his left pant leg, showing Bucky his prosthetic leg.

"I've been stuck behind a desk for six years because of this thing," he said, then he gestured at Bucky's arm. "The worst is when I feel like I have to scratch an itch. It just about drives me crazy. Can I ask you truthfully if you still experience phantom pain?"

"No, I don't," said Bucky. "But every once in a while, I wake up with it around my dick, which is weird because I'm right-handed."

Both men looked at him with their eyes wide open then the chief warrant officer started to laugh. "You're full of shit," he said.

Bucky shrugged. "Had you going though," he grinned. "What are you drinking?"

They both told him, and Bucky ordered the drinks for everyone, paying with a tap of his bank card then leaving a twenty-dollar bill in the jar as a tip. By the time they got back two more Marine warrant officers with their wives, friends of the chief warrant officer, were there and more introductions were made. It turned out all three military men were long time friends who enlisted at the same time, coming up through the ranks together, an unusual thing. All three had been sergeants at one point and met at this party every year to blow off steam, as they were now relegated to desk jobs until mandatory retirement.

Dinner was punctuated with conversations about missions, people they had served with, and places they had been. Tracey watched as Bucky let the conversation ebb and flow, occasionally asking questions for verification or emphasis. When the dishes were cleared, and the band started to set up the conversation turned to him and although he answered questions about the Howling Commandos no one brought up the Winter Soldier, until the slightly drunk lawyer asked how he seemingly survived with his sanity intact; how he didn't put a bullet in his own head at some point. The chief warrant officer looked a little angrily at the lawyer, having had a few drinks himself and he turned to Bucky.

"Sarge, you don't have to answer him," he said. "We three have been there at one point or another, wondering if what we went through was worth it all. I stay because of this beautiful woman who still loves me, and these two assholes that won't let me go. You have nothing to prove to us."

Smiling slightly, and patting Tracey's hand, which had gently been placed on his when the lawyer asked his question, Bucky cleared his throat and looked at the lawyer.

"I ask myself that every day," he said, not really angry at the question because he knew so many people wanted to ask but were afraid to. "A whole life was stolen from me and when I got free there were times I wanted to put a gun in my mouth and end it but then HYDRA would have won. I'm just asshole enough to want to prove to them that I'm still here, doing some good in the world, and they're not. So, every morning I wake up and I see this beautiful woman beside me, and I thank the universe for bringing us together. With her I'm going to have the life I want; a house, a family, and people who love me for the man I am, not for what my abilities can do for them." The music started and Bucky stood up with Tracey then he turned back to the others. "In the words of Auntie Mame, who my 94-year-old sister so happily quoted a few months ago: "Life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death." Gentlemen and ladies, I'm no sucker. I'm going to have my fill of life and I've only just begun."

With a smile to them he led Tracey to the floor and began dancing as the band started playing "The Way You Look Tonight." The several hundred people at that Washington New Year's Eve party that night all noticed the tall, muscular and handsome man dancing with the beautiful, dark-haired woman. Word had already gone around that it was Bucky Barnes and his wife. Together they glided effortlessly over the floor, so obviously in love, with their eyes only on each other. If there were any negative whispers about what he once was the couple ignored them. What mattered to them was the here and now, and for several hours they just danced. It's what they came to the party to do.

Chapter 27>>

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