#Gotta hand it to the Yiga Clan though
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Dont mind me, just having a fun date night with my girl in this cage
#totk#Gotta hand it to the Yiga Clan though#they got Zelda's height right..#yiga clan dedication to detail#tears of the kingdom#the legend of zelda#legend of zelda#zelink#zelda#tears of the kingdom spoilers#totk spoiler#totk quest#tears of the kingdom spoiler
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For some positive takes on Totk
Ganondorf’s design is just amazing. I kinda miss the Trident he has had for years, but damn, they just went hardcore on his design. It’s probably my favorite Ganondorf design of the bunch.
The final fight with Ganondord was mechanically pretty fun. I liked the permanent loss of hearts. It kinda offsets the healing issue botw/totk has. And his flurry rush is so damn cool.
The Horned Statue is freaking hilarious. It trying to make deals with a fish is funny imagery.
The Bargainer Statues are fun lore additions which I appreciate. I keep calling them Poe Collectors, though.
I really liked the Temple of Time in the sky is actually a temple that keeps track of time, like a big clock that tells everyone when to wake and when to sleep. It makes sense, honestly. Like yeah, a Temple of Time would do that.
The Japanese/Mayan? blend of the Zonai makes for a very interesting, unique culture for this new race. It’s striking and distinct. I prefer it over the Sheikah tech.
While I think the dungeon itself was very weak, the Wind Temple concept is amazing. The idea of an ark in the sky is very reminiscent of ancient Japanese lore, and reminds me of Okami’s ark in the end-game. The lead-up was also pretty great overall. The final leap into the air is something I will remember for a long time.
The beginning of the Thunder Temple is also so good. The atmosphere! The descent into a dank dungeon! I wish it was a better dungeon, but to me, it was the best dungeon in the game.
Tauro (I think that his name?) is very endearing. I can’t explain it. I think his goofy design and child-like joy over his research just puts a smile on my face. He just seems so genuine.
I really liked the regional phenomenon for the Gorons and the Zora. For one, they are both unique ideas to the series. The Zora usually face freezing as their threat, but sludge is a new idea and it works really well. As for the Gorons, it was genuinely off putting and I liked that.
You all are too hard on Sidon’s ability. It’s great! Boosts Zora weapons on the fly, gives you a water attack AND a temp shield? It’s more technical than Tulin’s, sure, but once you learn all the little secrets, Sidon’s ability goes really far.
I gotta say, I like Link’s design. I still prefer my green-cladded, left-handed Peter Pan Link, but they truly found a great design for this Link too. It’s distinct, cool, and flexible with other looks.
The story had some really great ideas in it. I always enjoy seeing eras without a hero. There is potential in those stories. The imagery of Link trying to catch Zelda at the start, and him finally catching her in the end, was great. Ganondorf already knowing them before the start of the adventure gets your heart pumping. Like man, what an entrance for the main bad guy.
Master Kohga remains the best character in these games. I didn’t love him in BotW, but AoC changed my mind, and Totk cemented it. In fact, I love the glow-up the Yiga Clan gets overall. They are funny and interesting. I kinda wish they did just a little more with them, because each interaction was an enjoyable one in this game.
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Oooh, are you taking requests again?? We missed you! ❤️❤️❤️ I've been dying to request something: Kohga has been away from the base and when he returns, lovesick Sooga is besides himself with horniness and shows his master how much he missed him (twist: Kohga's only been gone for like two hours 😂)
Sooga is literally a big pubby-needs affection and will literally be just SAD if you're not constantly at his side. Let's do it!
(Also? Missed you guys too ❤️)
Sooga's heart was in agony. Being in charge of the clan was an exhausting, grueling job, made worse by loneliness. Kohga had left to attend to an important task, and unfortunately Sooga wasn't allowed to accompany him. He had been gone for so long, Sooga was worried he'd forget what his love looked like. He was currently helping sharpening the tools in the armory, when he caught commotion just outside the room. Only two things caused so much hustle-an attack, or-
"Master Kohga!!"
The blacksmith, used to everyone bolting out for Kohga, leaned over to grab the blade Sooga would've dropped, had it not been for him.
"Tell Kohga I said welcome back, Sooga."
Sooga nodded at him as he bolted, and there he was. Kohga. Their leader, their shining example of the clan, and most importantly, his husband (not officially or legally, but in his heart. He was READY to make it official though, let's make that clear).
"Yes yes, I'm back, you degenerates, don't crowd, don't crowd."
"You heard the Master, all of you."
Sooga stepped in, giving Kohga the space he demanded. The yiga's listened well, but sometimes they were just too excited to keep their distance. Kohga lightly patted his tit in appreciation, and Sooga couldn't resist grabbing his hand, and planting a kiss on it. The very public display of affection made many of them whoop and holler- the yiga's were practically children. Kohga was failing to calm them down, but he was chuckling, showing it was all in good fun.
"Hey you idiots- if you guys don't knock it off, NO ONE gets their gifts!"
Everytime Kohga went shopping, he always picked up these special chocolates for the clan, and knowing he brought them again, made them go so damn bananas-you'd think they were rioting. Kohga chuckled, gesturing to the giant crate right behind him.
"Sooga, make sure everyone gets one, yeah? I'll be in my room-"
"May I join you after?"
Kohga was so intelligent, he could tell he was observing the signs Sooga was putting out. The grip of his hand, the rather submissive tone in his voice. Kohga chuckled.
"Course. I'll be waiting for ya. But, unfortunately, ya gotta let go of my hand."
"I would cut off my hand if it meant keeping this hold right now."
For most, that'd be morbid. But for Kohga, it was just yiga brand sweetness. He chuckled, giving a shake of his head.
"You're so fucking dumb. Come on, the faster you get started, the faster you get to be with me."
Sooga tried not to whine as he obeyed, and watched Kohga walk away. He turned to look at the clan, and they were waiting anxiously, hungrily. Sooga COULD pass them one at a time, like his master requested. Or, he could have someone do it for him. As long as the task was done, right?
"Cil."
Cil tore himself away from the crowd, disgust evident in his tone.
"That display was disgusting, and so was everyone who supported-"
"Pass these out."
"W-but that's your job."
"And now it's yours. I have other duties to attend to."
Sooga rammed his shoulder into the crate, and the second the lid came off, everyone went NUTS. Sooga almost felt bad for watching Cil get absolutely dog piled for treats. Almost. Crossing this off his list, he excused himself to Kohga's room, and there he was. He had just sat down, and had poured himself a cold glass of juice. He seemed surprised when Sooga came in, but definitely didn't seem upset by it.
"Huh. You finished that awfully fast. You didn't just let them have at it, did you? That's how fights start."
"Of course not. I let Cil handle it. After I popped open the lid."
Kohga snorted, but tried to compose himself, mainly for the sake of spilling his drink.
"Oh you're a fucking dick, Sooga-that's fucking funny."
"I missed you. The fact that he's possibly getting his hair pulled out is just a bonus."
He helped himself to a seat on the bed, right next to Kohga. Kohga didn't acknowledge it for a second, favoring a sip of his drink. He was making him sweat on purpose, he could tell. Kohga took a fair drink, before snapping his fingers, and opening his palm. Sooga followed the command, and put his chin in Kohga's oh so soft hand.
"What made you give him a task that I told YOU to do? You usually do your job like a good boy."
Sooga whined, putting his hand over Kohga's, hoping his Master could read his fondness.
"I missed you too much. I'd be mourning you if I didn't see you immediately."
Sooga stepped out of line, finding himself looming over him. Usually he didn't do this without permission, but he couldn't HELP it. Kohga chuckled in a bit of surprise.
"Geez- someone's squirmy."
"You've been gone for so long- I was almost thinking you took another lover."
"...I've been gone for two hours."
"You'd only need two minutes."
That made Kohga LAUGH. It was such a beautiful, loud, charming laugh. He went in for a kiss, only for Kohga to hold a finger up.
"Hold on, I'm NOT wasting this juice, it slaps harder than my cheeks are gonna in a second."
Sooga was so fucking in love, he couldn't believe it. He waited for his Master to finish his drink, before he put the empty glass on the night stand, and open his arms to Sooga.
"Alright, come here, big boy~"
Sooga obeyed immediately. He dove in for a kiss, and almost swooned upon feeling Kohga's arms wrap around his neck. He sank into the kisses, finally letting his heart feel from the aching loneliness. One kiss, two, three, four-Sooga found himself quickly losing track, given the fingertips that danced across his arms. Sooga mumbled against his lips, knowing he sounded like he just discovered what love was like.
"I missed you. I missed you so much. Not being able to kiss you was agony."
"Oh it was just the kissing you missed."
They both chuckled at that. It was rare for Sooga to be vulgar, given his respect for his Master, but every once and a while, his body spoke instead of his mind.
"Let me clarify-not touching you was agony. Not being able to fuck you was torture."
Kohga chuckled as Sooga buried his face in Kohga's neck, adorning his skin with kisses. Pair that with him slowly starting to grind his body upon his, and Kohga was starting to understand just how much Sooga missed him.
"Not even a minute in and you're grinding your dick on me- pervert."
"Says the one trying to use his feet to try to pull down my attire."
"You got some mouth on you today. I like it~"
With a bit of work, Sooga managed to get their clothes off. It felt so much better, getting rid of that cloth. As thin as it was, it was separating him from his Master, and he hated it. He pushed himself inside his ass without much fanfare, and he adored the swear that escaped his Master's lips. It wasn't the roughest sex they've ever had, but it didn't matter to either. It just mattered that he was inside of him, just that he got to touch him.
"I missed you. Everything about you. Including your tummy. I really missed it. It's so soft and sweet, just like you."
"I fucking hate that you talk like a sap, but you're hung like fucking deli meat."
Sooga adored him and his words. He adored pushing himself in and out, adored how much Kohga was trying to keep his composure, but was failing. His cock was starting to leak, and Sooga was taking great pride in knowing it was because of him. He kissed him, right under his ear, trying not to swoon and focus on delivering his Master his pleasure.
"I'm only so sweet on you because I love you. I love you so much. You should stop leaving me. You should stay here forever, I could do this forever. I'll please you until you beg me to stop."
Sooga gripped into his ass, digging into such nice, full cheeks. Kohga actually yelped, clearly not expecting it. He lightly smacked him on his shoulder, as if trying to get him to behave, but he knew he loved it.
"Is it you missing me, or you worried someone's gonna try to take me from you?"
"...both."
The idea made Sooga just. Angry. He bucked against him, making Kohga cry out in surprise, and Sooga knew he hit just that right spot. Kohga dug his fingers into his hair, peeling away that pesky hair tie, and digging his fingers into his hair. He grabbed a fistful of it, and Sooga knew it was an act of desperation.
"T-then you should...just cum in me. That way people know I'm yours."
"You're...mine?"
He looked into his eyes. Even without the mask, he could see the flushed features and soft eyes. Kohga nodded.
"Y-yeah. I'm yours big guy. You just...gotta fill me. Come on, you're close."
"I am. And I WILL."
And Sooga meant it. Pushing himself in till his balls pressed up against his body, he came. Sooga had to cum outside plenty of times, but Sooga MUCH preferred doing it inside. It felt so much more special, it felt almost romantic. Kohga pumped his own cock as Sooga spilled inside of him, quickly cumming right after Sooga. It was so sweet, Kohga letting him go first this time around. They sat there, sticky in sweat and cum. Kohga sighed in content, going absolutely limp in his arms.
"Good boy Sooga. Very...good boy, shit."
Sooga chuckled, kissing his Master's forehead.
"Let me get us a towel-"
"Noooo, wait. Stay. You feel good like this."
"I'm sorry- who missed who here?~"
"Wipe that smirk off your stupid face, and kiss me."
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I wrote a (very) short Yiga Husbands story, because I really need to get back into the mood of writing on my own time again. Be warned, it’s pretty angsty and unpolished, but I thought it was still good enough to post.
Copyright © @russieraholic. Do not Re-post. (By the way, Reblogging is different than Reposting! Reblogs are appreciated!) I should also mention that if anyone wants to make artwork, continuations, or spinoffs of this story you’re welcome to! Just tag and credit me in your work (because well, that’s not only the right thing to do, but I want to see it too!) (Though I heavily doubt this will become viral.)
Writing theft is art theft!
Sheer, frigid winds were commonplace in the desolate, snowy Tabantha Tundra. Really it was more of a large valley, but that is precisely why the wind tunneling was so fierce and brutal. The snow was at least three feet deep and made traversing the landscape hell, if hell could freeze over.
For Sooga, that seemed to be the case. An endless frigid hell. Despite being wrapped snugly in several coats, and numerous scarves covering all but his one good eye, the air still gnawed at him with the cold teeth of a thousand winter wolves. He should not be here. He did not want to be here. But... Sooga had searched all of Hyrule for his beloved, and nothing, no place at all, had come to bear fruit. This was the last place he needed to scour.
Sooga had started the arduous journey in the southeast, working in a snaking pattern to cover practically every square inch of grass, dirt, gravel, sand and snow in the land. It had taken him weeks to do so- and he started as soon as he heard the news that Master Kohga had disappeared without a trace, in action. Usually Sooga never failed to accompany his beloved master in combat. It was a rare exception that he needed to stay back at the hideout, but tensions were high that day and he needed to hold down the fort.
How funny that the one day that the two were apart, was the day that Kohga vanished. It strongly led Sooga to believe that whatever happened, was planned by an outside force. Like an opportunistic predator, it had lied in wait for the perfect moment to strike. Sooga had a few suspects in mind, but most of them had plenty of evidence supporting that it was not them.
Astor, however, had been proving to be quite malevolent ever since he decided that the Yiga Clan was not worth his ‘precious time and energy’, so to speak. He had been taking soldiers down left and right, and had even broken into the hideout to steal goods more than once. It only made sense that the next step would be to harm the leader. In addition, strongly supporting this theory, he had disappeared in the same timeframe that Kohga had. It all fit together too perfectly.
Sooga got his head out of the clouds, steeling himself and continuing to scan the landscape, his eye catching anything that was not the flat white snow, or the frozen-over trees we had familiarized himself with. It was like identifying an out-of-place bump on a blank white canvas; difficult, but not impossible. Accompanying him was a Blademaster, and a handful of footsoldiers that doubled as medics, who were equally as cold as Sooga himself. They were doing their best to help with the search, but spent most of the time huddled closely together to conserve heat.
The man grumbled, slightly annoyed that his men were not taking the matter as seriously as they should have been. “Yiga Clan. I am fully aware that the circumstances are relentless. But the importance of finding our Master vastly outweighs any temporary discomfort that we experience. Stay vigilant. I did not select you few without reason. We must press on.”
After what felt like hours of searching, and likely was, in fact, almost an entire day, the group was just about to give up. However, at the very edge of the tundra, just before the land came to an abrupt stop and dropped off into a spine-chillingly deep trench, lay a lump of snow, that just barely caught the corner of Sooga’s eye. It was out of place, especially since it had just snowed and the tundra was for the most part, very flat. It looked a bit too large to be a wolf or fox, but too small to be a bear.
Strangely, Sooga felt an unrelenting force pressing him to investigate more. As he drew closer, inexplicably his heart started to sink. With every laborious step he took, it continued to plummet until it felt like a fifty-pound weight had replaced it. Yet he trudged on, needing to find out what lay beneath the snow layer.
He started to brush away the snow layer carefully, not wanting to scare whatever was under it, if it was a living thing. But what he started to uncover explained why he felt so drawn towards the location- and very quickly, the soft brushing of the snow away turned into frantic digging. Sooga’s soldiers finally caught up to him, and saw how frantic he was acting.
“HELP ME, DAMN YOU! DON’T JUST STAND THERE!” He barked.
Immediately the soldiers moved to help him and very quickly understood why Sooga snapped at them. It was a disgusting, grotesque sight to see. But they did it- they found Kohga. Which was their ultimate goal. Sooga had never cried before, but this was the end of that record. Salty tears were freezing to his cheek as they fell.
Poor Kohga was nothing short of absolutely mangled. The snow just around him was as red as the completely torn-up suit he wore. His left leg was sliced clean off, which was in fact so clean that it looked like someone had taken their time with a scalpel to slice every vein and artery with precision. His rib cage looked crushed, and there was a band tied tightly around his right wrist that had clearly cut off his circulation. His right hand was in an advanced state of necrosis.
The medics immediately checked for a pulse and any signs of life, as Sooga held the man in his arms. “It’s okay... I-It’s okay... you’re going to be okay... the pain is over now... I’m here....” he cried, unsure of who he truly was reassuring. Kohga, or himself.
A footsoldier looked to Sooga. “He’s alive but we’ve gotta get him back quick. I dunno what we’ll be able to do for him, if anything, but we’ll try...”
Sooga looked down, a searing pain in his heart. “Do it, then. There is no time to lose.”
The soldiers took hold of Kohga and in a puff of smoke and talismans, disappeared with him, back to the hideout where the medical team may or may not be able to stabilize him. It was a matter of luck, really, at this point. Sooga stayed behind, however. He stared at the bloodstained snow, trembling now not because he was cold, but because he was absolutely devastated. Regret, grief, and self-blame all started to plague his mind, like a dark storm cloud creeping over the land.
This was his fault. There were no two ways about it. He deserved a thousand times as much pain as Kohga was going through. That was just a fact, at this point. Common sense and self-preservation was the only thing keeping him from going to Astor and asking to be stabbed through the chest ten times by a rusty blade.
“Kohga...” was the only word that could escape Sooga’s lips.
#yiga clan#yiga husbands#sooga age of calamity#aoc sooga#sooga x kohga#kohga#master kohga#tw gore#tw blood#tw: gore#tw: blood#tloz: age of calamity#age of calamity#Astor#astor prophet of doom#Yiga#loz aoc#loz fanfic
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If that is what you wish (1/?)
[AO3] || [discord]
my friendship with volink is over, kohga/sooga is my new comfort ship now jk i’ll always love volink
now i have to actually write more of them uhhhhhhhhhH
Sooga was born to serve; it was all he knew in his blood, a long bloodline that once served the royal family who feared their technology; now he served his clan as their general, their leader, second-in-command to the Top Banana himself.
Whatever Master Kohga wanted, he always got it in the end.
As absurd as some of his requests might have been, Kohga’s wishes were fulfilled in a timely manner. Sooga made sure of it — without question or objection. With any order that came, Sooga would only answer, “If that is what you wish.” Kohga was easy to please as long as his needs were met, and Sooga kept his master as a priority over himself. He was there at Kohga’s beck and call, coming to his master’s aid at precisely the right time—
“Sooga, you’re late!” Kohga thrashed in his corner against the wall of rock. His plans had fallen through the last of its cracks. “I nearly got peeled like a banana!”
The assassin ignored the tantrum from him, kneeling before Kohga to carefully cradle him before hauling him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. Kohga’s thrashing ceased almost immediately, his body going limp over his shoulder. It wasn’t the first time Sooga had held the clan’s leader like this.
Sooga craned his neck to stare at the Gerudo Chief and her entourage. “Forget these cowards.” And cowards they were, the four of them against one. Gerudo, two Hylians, a Sheikah — despicable. His free hand reached into the pouch in the backside of his belt — after shooing away Kohga’s wandering fingers. “It’s time to retreat.” He spared no second smashing the bomb into the Gerudo sands, shrouding them in a thick cloud of smoke to make their escape. Urbosa’s curses were drowned out by the sound of Master Kohga’s giddy laughter.
Once they were safe away from any prying eyes in an abandoned outpost beyond the Molduga’s dwellings, Master Kohga finally wiggled his way out of Sooga’s grip, both of his feet sinking into the desert sands.
“I almost died, Sooga!” he exclaimed, throwing his arms up in the air dramatically before clutching the sides of his face and shaking his head. “Gods, the amount of stress they put me under nearly burst my bubble, I can’t believe they made me use the secret technique! My perfect, perfect plan failed, and if you had showed up even a second later—“
“I apologize, Master.” Sooga’s voice was cool through the heat of Kohga’s anxieties, but even if his master was in the clear, safe from any obvious dangers, there was a pang of guilt that still struck through him. The idea of losing Master Kohga by his own mistakes was not an option. Sooga bowed his head. “I will make sure it does not happen again.”
The desert breeze filled the seconds that passed between them. The gravity of the situation was beginning to sink in: there was an uprising beginning to brew, and the Yiga definitely weren’t up to par like they had imagined.
Kohga let out a long exhale. “I know you won’t, big guy.” He turned his head to study the long, deep crack in the mask that hid Sooga’s true face. Kohga knew that underneath, the assassin’s words held truth; his loyalty was unmatched by any other member of the clan. Sooga was wrapped around his finger. “I know you won’t.
“Even if it did,” he started, bringing a hand up to comically rub at his chin in deep thought, “I think you’re more than over-qualified to take my place. Problem is, you’d gotta take my name. ‘Master Sooga’,” he enunciated with air quotes, “doesn’t have quite a nice ring like ‘Master Kohga’.”
Sooga’s posture stiffened at the idea. It thrilled him to know that Kohga recognized his strength and leadership skills — the consequences, on the other hand…
“... I could never, Master Kohga.”
“Lighten up, will ya?” Kohga barked a laugh as he gave his second-in-command a playful shove to his shoulder. “I ain’t ready to retire yet! With you by my side, I know you won’t let that come to pass, hmm?”
The assassin’s head bowed even lower despite Kohga’s praise. His hands balled into tight fists at his side. No, he could never allow his master to fend for himself alone, putting his life at risk again — he would make sure of it.
“If I may, Master Kohga?”
Kohga nodded and waved his hand nonchalantly. “You may.”
Sooga stood back to his full height and kept his eyes fixed on Kohga. “To guarantee that you are spared from an unforeseen demise where I am not present, I suggest that from this point forward, I shall take your place in orchestrating our efforts to bring Hyrule to its knees. Or, at the very least, you are not alone.”
His master carefully considered his words. Kohga hummed lowly in thought, back to rubbing his chin as he always did. “Not a bad idea, I’d say…” He trailed off to stare off in the distance. He paused too long for Sooga’s liking. “It’s a deal I can’t say no to, but that’s not my choice to make.”
“Understood, Master Kohga. Wherein the circumstances may allow it, I implore you to consider the offer.”
“Good talk.” Kohga clapped his hand on Sooga’s shoulder. “Now get us outta here! The sun’s making me sweat, and we’ve got an audience to entertain.”
“If that is what you wish.”
——
“So, you turned and fled, is that it?”
Astor was seated at the opposite end of the table from where Kohga sat and Sooga stood. Though the curtains were pulled, sealing out the setting Gerudo sun, and the candlelight cast dark shadows over his face, Sooga could see that this so-called “prophet” was not pleased. Kohga didn’t seem to care too much; he sat sideways in his seat, idly humming a tune that didn’t sound like an actual song.
Sooga wondered if Kohga was able to take matters seriously.
“Hm-hmm, hm-hmmm….” Kohga shrugged. “Well, if they hadn’t interrupted me—“
“It seems that, as low as my expectations of you were, I was overly optimistic.”
Both pairs of Yiga eyes fixed onto Astor as he stood from his place. Kohga jumped to attention, insulted that the prophet would see him as anything less than competent; Sooga’s hands were already wrapped around both hilts of his blades, ready to strike if need be.
“Well, no matter.” Their pale guest paid them no mind as he moved around to the middle of the table with the likes of a glowing ancient core in his hands, stopping at the front of the altar where their destiny lay among the piles of bananas.
With the imminent threat gone, Kohga relaxed instantly and threw himself back into his chair, folding his arms behind his head and crossing his legs, humming his little tune. Sooga, on the other hand, was slower to let his guard down, but complied with a wave of his superior’s hand. His glare remained on Astor’s back.
Sooga despised him.
Astor held the core outward as an offering to the guardian that hid among the fruit, idly flashing a strange orange light through its purple smog. “My harbinger,” he cooed, “show me the future!”
The guardian screeched in only a language that Astor seemed to understand, unfazed by the thick clouds of dark magic that spiraled in the room. The Yiga stood mesmerized by it, Kohga left completely awestruck. The core lifted from Astor’s hands to glow its eerie purple energy, bursting forth into a cloud of space, shrouding the three of them in stars and constellations that the Yiga weren’t familiar with.
“Ah, yes…” Through a tear in the clouds, a glimpse of Hyrule Castle falling into darkness could be seen — the Calamity and their destiny achieved. “The future as it will and must be. I will not allow anyone to alter its course.” The clouds slowly dissipated into the air, the ancient core slowly winding down and back into Astor’s hands. The guardian grew silent and still, leaving only the orange glow from its singular eye as a signal that it was still listening. “No one at all, not even you two.
“Now then… there are matters from this point forward that I need to discuss with you, Kohga.” He turned his head to address his underlings. His eyes briefly met with Sooga’s. “Alone.”
Quick to detect foul play, the assassin took a step forward to put himself between Kohga and Astor. “Absolutely not. Whatever you can discuss with Master Kohga, you can discuss with me. I stand by him wholeheartedly.”
Astor’s lips twitched into a snarl. He wasn’t used to being told “no”. “I admire your dedication and nobility, truly, but your time to play your part will come. As I said, these are matters not concerning you.” His eyes narrowed. “I will not repeat myself. Leave.”
Sooga didn’t have much time to even move so much as a muscle before Kohga’s elbow met his midsection.
“Sooga!” He snapped loudly, surprising the both of them. “Leave us alone. We’ll be alright for a little bit, won’t we? No need to worry your pretty little head.” Kohga motioned for him to lean down, pulling him closer by the chin to whisper into his ear. “I’ll fill you in on the details when it’s all said and done.”
The taller Yiga held his doubts, but complied with a curt nod. “If that is what you wish.”
Sooga stood and eyed Astor guardedly, watching his thin lips curl into a smug smile as they traded places, the prophet now skulking to Kohga’s side. Sooga had barely stepped out of the room before his master called out, “Don’t forget to shut the doors behind you!”
He turned to seal the doors behind him, seeing that Kohga had waved him off and leaned ever closer to Astor. Just above a whisper, Kohga asked, “Ain’t he a dandy?”
Astor grimaced. “Indeed.”
The doors shut behind him.
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Okay but, I love the idea that after the events of AoC that Master Kohga, Robbie and Purah hang out sometimes because they're all freaking chaotic and goofy. There's even a little sidequest that talks about how the Yiga clan gave some supplies to the lab.(So it seems like they're on good terms now.)
Poor Impa, she's probably like "Oh no, now I have to deal with three of them..". 😂
Chaotic uncle Kohga? He tries teaching little baby Jakahl how to spawn the spiky metal balls and Purah and Robbie have to tell him "He's a baby, teach him when he's older."
While Impa is the overprotective aunt and is like "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! That's dangerous! Why are you encouraging him?!"
okay admittedly i had never considered it but like.............u might have SWAYED ME.
like. i'm in the middle of cleaning, saw this ask while waiting for the sink to fill, and as i was mopping i just. this silly scenario came to mind ignore me i'm just riffing but like.
Purah, Robbie, and Impa are with a group going to the Yiga Hideout to like. idk. Work on stuff with them as a part of continuing to mend the relationships and whatnot.
All three of them were probably on the fence about even bringing Jakahl with them in the first place, but with the yiga having done nothing nefarious in YEARS and no signs of them returning to Ganon, they figure the best way to break the cycle is to not hide things from the next generation.
Jakahl is supposed to at the very least stay with Impa for the main part of the day. Seeing as Purah and Robbie are probably going to be dealing with who knows what kind of machinery, Impa insisted he stay with her. (he's maybe. 7 or 8 at this point?? idk a younger child but not helpless)
Jakahl...gets bored. Impa's work being more of a historian, it's not that Jakahl doesn't like spending time with her, he'd just...rather be doing something a little more exciting. In his boredom, he. Accidentally. Teleports himself away. (with purah having very limited powers and robbie having none, nobody really eXPECTED HIM TO HAVE THEM? SO??)
Impa is INSTANTLY. OH GODDESS. WHERE DID HE GO??? WE GOTTA FIND HIM
The others she's with try to calm her down like, "it'll be fine. nobody here will hurt him, and if he gets too close to something that could hurt him, he'll end up near his parents anyways"
But she says, "Nothing here will hurt him, but his parents???? will LEVEL this place trying to find him if we tell them we LOST HIM"
And half the yiga have probably had their asses handed to them by Purah and Robbie so like. Instant search party. Research can wait whERE IS THE CHILD-
Tearing up the place, they can't find him. Everywhere they look, they just. Can't find him.
Eventually, Impa, in her own teleporting frenzy, falls down in front of Purah and Robbie, absolutely frazzled.
Purah laughs at first. "You good?"
She stays kneeling on the ground. "Can't find him..."
Robbie hears her clearly, and is instantly like "uh-oh".
"Can't what?" Purah asks, kneeling down in front of her.
"Jakahl- he poofed away, I didn't know he has powers- he poofed away and i can't find him- I can't find him-"
And there is just. A noticeable TENSION in the air as Purah stands up and looks at Robbie. A bit of a. Manic. Smile on her face. "Robbie," she says, her voice strained and up an octave.
He grabs her hand. "It's gonna be okay- he's our kid. He's smart- he won't get hurt. We raised him-" (and don't be mistaken, he is JUST AS WORKED UP AS SHE IS. he just knows oNE of them has to be rational in this moment)
She ignores him, turning on all the scientists they were working with. "If anything happens to my baby- if anyone lays a single hand on him I will level this place!!!" and poofs away with Robbie in tow before anyone can say anything else.
Hell hath no fury like a mother who can't find her child.
Meanwhile.
Jakahl is having the time of his life. Poofing in and out of places, getting further and further away, stirring up a little trouble before poofing away again.
But then he exhausts himself. On his last poof, he ends up at that back arena area where you meet Kohga for the first time in BoTW.
Falls right on top of a sleeping Kohga, bouncing off him almost comically, landing in the sand.
Kohga is iNSTANTLY on alert like. "WHO'S THERE? WHO'S LOOKIN' FOR A FIGHT WITH THE ALL MIGHTY MASTER KOH-"
and then he just. sees this small child, who is exhausted and about to start crying bc. It's finally caught up to him that he can't poof around anymore AND that he has NO IDEA where Aunt Impa is.
A crying kid is the laST thing Kohga wants so he's just. He kneels down. "Whose kid are you??"
Jakahl has clammed up, and won't talk.
Looking him over. "Well. White hair. You're a Sheikah kid...didn't those scientists come visit today or somethin'?"
Jakahl nods.
Looking at his face, Kohga puts together who he is. "Oh, yeah. You're those wack job's kid. Jack Fruit, right?"
He shakes his head.
"Close enough, though?"
He shrugs.
Kogha hums, sitting across from him. "How'd you get out here?"
Jakahl finally answers him, and at least now that he's got him talking, Kohga relaxes.
"Can you help me get back to my mom and dad, or aunt impa?" Jakahl asks.
Kohga shakes his head. "Nah, kid, that's work! They'll come lookin' for you. You're exhausted from all that poofin' around. Take it easy."
Eventually, Sooga comes to find Kohga, intent on telling him that Purah is essentially, tearing the place apart looking for her son.
Needless to say, he's surprised to see that Kohga is just. Entertaining the kid. He doesnt' have a large spike ball out, but he's got a few tiny ones and making them float around, and it's absolutely got Jakahl entertained.
"Master Kohga..."
"Oh, hey Sooga! Check this out!"
"His parents are looking for him. His mother is tearing the base apart-"
Kohga just laughs, not taking his focus off Jakahl. "Bring 'em here! he's fine." More quietly, just to Jakahl, "See, told you they'd come get you. Way easier."
Barely a few seconds after Sooga is gone, Purah poofs in the arena, right behind Jakahl, scooping him up. She poofs away again, handing him off to Robbie and Impa who arrived a fraction of a second after she did, and then she is BACK in front of Kohga, snatching him up by the collar as the mini spike balls fall around them.
"WHAT WERE YOU DOING?"
He's nOT looking for an ass beating from her, Robbie, or IMPA (bc if he thinks about it too hard, he can sTILL feel how walloped he got by her back before the calamity [in the Destroy The Yiga Clan mission]) but he's able to play it cool.
"Relaaaax, Purah. Was keepin' the kid entertained till you lot showed up. He was poofin' around too much and exhausted himself."
"I was having fun!" Jakahl yells from across the arena.
"Promise?" Purah asks.
She can see him nodding, and can tell that Robbie and Impa are confirming with him again.
Her anger is just. Instantly gone. "Guess you get to live another day, Kohga," Purah says, letting go of him. He falls to the ground, and she just. Plops down in front of him. "Damn, I'm worn out. Big base, you got here."
And just like that, tensions are resolved, and now that it's over, it's easier to laugh at. (impa tho...is gonna need a Minute to recover)
Kohga, "Some promising powers on that kid! Should let me teach him how to summon the spikes!"
Jakahl instantly looks at both his parents, "PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE"
They shake their head, looking at one another, Impa breathing a sigh of relief.
Purah, "He needs to be a little older."
Robbie, "Wait 'till he's like...ten."
and impa is just like "NOOO W H Y"
and thus Uncle Kohga is a regular in their life, much to Impa's chagrin. (she'll come around to him eventually, but the poor woman has probably gotten a few stress ulcers from their combined shenanigans)
#that was A LOT#IM SORRY#let me not hijack ur character like that 😅#purobbie#hwaoc#iaintcallinyafordinner#long post
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Shadows of Hyrule | Chapter 78
Link quite literally slept through the next two days, only getting up when his stomach demanded that he eat. When his phone alerted him to a call or text, he lifted his head enough to check to see who it was from. Unless it was Mipha, he mostly ignored these alerts. He would have slept through the rest of the summer if he had the chance, but there was still one last thing he needed to; return the Master Sword. The Triforce on hand was a reminder of that. It was dim, but it had been pulsing softly ever since he and Zelda sealed Ganondorf away. He knew he couldn’t waste any more time, but a part of him was sad to part with the sword. It wouldn’t be there waiting for him, leaning against the wall in the corner of his room. As anxious as he was to get back to his normal life, normal life seemed rather dull.
Still, Link finally pulled himself out of his bed, and without a word to his father or his friends, he left the house with the sword and made his way back to the forest where he had found it. If it were still there. The last time they tried to close the portal, the forest seemed to have mysteriously disappeared with no explanation at all. This time, however, the forest was there, just as he had remembered it, seemingly waiting for the return of the Master Sword.
There was no voice to call to him, but he didn’t need it to guide him like he had the first time he wandered through. It was as if he had navigated his way through the bizarre forest time and time again; he knew the path like the back of his hand, picking his way over the brush, weaving in and out between the trees. He was unfazed when a fog crept in around him, but just as quickly as it appeared, it disappeared, and soon the forest opened up into the meadow. In the center, in the light of the sun, was the pedestal that homed the Master Sword.
Link looked down at the ancient pedestal, covered in dirt and moss. There was a deep slit in the center where he had pulled the sword six months ago. And now, it was time to return it, though it felt as if he were saying goodbye forever to a very close friend. He turned his gaze to the sword in his hand and let his fingers run over the blade. He turned back to the pedestal and before he changed his mind, he placed the sword back into its hold, pushing it in until it would not go any further. He kept his hand on the hilt for a moment, then pulled upwards, but the sword did not budge. He let a light sigh escape his lips, then worked off the string of the charm his father had given him and slid it into his pocket.
“ Goodbye, Master... Thank you...”
Link looked down at the sword and smiled. He saluted it casually before turning his back on it and making his way out of the forest. Once he was passed the treeline, he looked over his shoulder, expecting the forest to disappear. Though it remained, he was sure it would be gone soon enough, protecting the precious weapon that now slept within.
*****
When Link returned, Daruk, Revali, and Teba were waiting for him.
“Where the hell have you been?” Daruk asked.
“Yeah, way to ignore our texts,” Revali said. “Now that you got a girlfriend you’re too good to respond to us?”
“Yeah,” Link said. “Because those group messages were so important.”
“I don’t know how I got dragged into that,” Teba said. He sneered at Revali. “Why the hell did you add me to that?”
“But if you weren’t in it,” Link started, “you would have missed all those gems like.” He paused and fished his phone out of his pocket, scrolling through the messages. He grinned and pointed at the screen, reading the text out loud. “When someone says ‘hold your horses’ they are telling you to be stable.”
“It’s true!” Revali said. “I just realized that!”
“Were you high?” Daruk asked.
“Yeah, probably,” Revali said with a grin.
“What do you want?”
“We are here to discuss the official disbanding of Hyrule’s Champions,” Revali announced.
“Excellent,” Link said. “Just in time. I just dumped the sword.”
“Aw,” Revali said. “Now you’re not cool like the rest of us.”
Link rolled his eyes.
“Do you think you can handle the city this year while we’re off being awesome?”
“Don’t be like that,” Teba said. “You know he’s gonna miss us terribly.”
“We are the only friends he’s got,” Revali said with a frown. “Poor Link.”
Link shrugged. “I’m sure I’ll survive.”
“He’s got a girlfriend now,” Daruk said. “He’s already doing better than you.”
“But does he get laid?” Revali said. “At least I got laid.”
Teba snorted. “When was the last time that happened?”
“Hey,” Revali snapped. “I’ve been a little busy saving the world.” He turned back to link. “Speaking of the Yiga Clan.”
“No one was talking about the Yiga Clan,” Teba said.
“Look,” Link started. “I talked to him, alright?”
“And?” Daruk asked.
“And,” he said slowly. “He told me not to worry about it.”
“That’s exactly what they say when we should be worried about it.”
“He has it under control,” Link said. “We don’t need to be involved.”
“Maybe he’s the one with the Yiga Clan,” Revali said.
“Shut it,” Link growled. “I’m staying out of it. I trust him.”
Revali nodded. “Alright. Fine. If Mr. Hero says it’s fine, then it’s fine.” He wiped his hands together. “Won’t be our problem, anyway. Just remember, you’ll be missing half your crew. Don’t get into trouble. Or killed.”
Link smiled. “You take the fun out of everything.”
“I’m going to miss this,” Revali said, then shrugged. “I’m sure I’ll find someone in college to pick on.”
Link frowned. “You’re replacing me? I thought we had something special.”
Revali winked and threw him two finger guns. “Come on, men” he said, turning away. “I still got some partying to do before I gotta ditch this city.” He turned to Link over his shoulder. “Not you.”
“It’s fine,” Link said. “I’m gonna go get laid.”
Revali threw his hand up in the air, half of a high-five. “Nice!”
Teba shook his head and lowered Revali’s hand for him. “Come on, Idiot,” he said. “Or I’m ditching you to get laid, too.”
Daruk followed them out of the driveway. “I can’t believe everyone’s getting laid except me.”
*****
The rest of the summer went just as Hyrule’s Champions hoped it would go. They stayed out late and slept through the mornings, more often than not in each other’s company in one way or another, and usually with three extra tagalongs; Aryll, Riju, and Teba. They spent their days roaming the city or keeping the local restaurants open with their bottomless pits. And from time to time, they dropped by their favorite arcade, only to be chased out by the owner an hour later after an unruly game of laser tag.
And everywhere they went, they were recognized. Children ran up to the for autographs. Teens asked for selfies. Even the older crowd seemed to regard them with a respectful nod, despite the varying degrees of gossip and arguments that had ensued following the first media outbreak. And when it got to be too much for them, they escaped the city to the countryside, returning to their favorite lake with a case of beer.
But the summer quickly came to a close, and before they knew it, Urbosa, Daruk, Revali, and Teba parted ways with their friends to begin their first year in college. Urbosa moved south to the Gerudo region to study law at a prestigious college. Daruk went to Akkala to a school known for their boxing and wrestling teams, which he decided to get into, proudly stating to his friends that he would have to hold back, otherwise there would be no challenge for him.
And despite his father’s refusal to help get into college, Revali managed to follow Teba to a school in Hebra, stating that he would have a babe on each arm and a suit made of ‘hundos’ when he graduated. As far as the group knew, he simply went in with the intent to get a degree in business, but whether he would actually graduate was an entirely different story, considering the college was known to be one of the biggest party schools in the kingdom. “Well, there’s nothing else to do up there,” was Revali’s defense.
The city - and their lives - were much quieter once their friends left for college. But senior year was quickly approaching for Link, Mipha, and Zelda, with promise of heavy work loads and one final push for college applications. It would be enough to occupy their minds and give them a normal life once more, but still, they couldn’t help but to miss the way things were a year ago when the group was whole.
But the night before their first day of senior year, they were all dragged into another group text message, courtesy of Urbosa.
My little babies are seniors tomorrow. Pack a healthy lunch and study hard! I’m looking at you, Link!
Revali didn’t hesitate to jump at the opportunity to tease Link. Let’s be real here. He’s not going to college. He’s gonna milk the hero thing for the rest of his life.
Teba’s response was next. Why am I a part of this…
Because youre our cheerleader, bitch, texted Revali.
Revali we’re sitting next to each other. There was a lull in the chat for a moment until Teba texted again. Revali punched me.
Urbosa responded with an emoji shaking its head.
You bitches are coming to my first fight, Daruk texted.
Link doesn’t condone violence, Revali said. Make love not war guys.
Dude, Link replied. Youre like a 3 days drive away.
Its a 4 hour drive, loser. Dont you miss me?
Link replied with a heart emoji. So much.
Why dont you stick it in his butt, came Revali’s mature reply.
Don’t be jealous of our relationship, Link said.
Does Mipha know? Teba asked.
We have an open relationship, Mipha finally chimed in.
Does that mean youre open for business? Revali said.
Eat shit, Link quickly replied.
Link and Mipha sitting in a tree, Revali texted.
Oh shit, Link said.
Revali finished the song with a series of kissing emojis and various other symbols that suggested more than kissing.
Omg dont tell her that Link said.
Link, we’re dating.
He responded with two blushing emoji faces.
Where the fuck is Zelda, Urbosa texted.
After a moment, Zelda’s text came through. Hylia, why have you put me into this insufferable group of people.
You love us, Revali said.
Destiny, Daruk said. Isn’t that kinda her thing?
We belong together, Revali texted.
Revali is singing, now, Teba said. I cannot believe I’m stuck with him for the next four years.
Welcome to my hell, Link said.
I’m muting you all, Zelda said. Some of us have school in the morning.
Suckas, Revali said.
Revali, you do, too, Teba said.
I didn’t come here to go to school.
Good night idiots, Zelda said.
Good night my precious lil babies, Urbosa texted. I love you all and i hope you have a good first day of school! Send mama pictures! And BEHAVE!!
What happens if we don’t behave? Revali asked, following that with a series of winking faces. Are you going to spank me?
Zelda left the chat.
Mipha left the chat.
Link left the chat.
Urbosa left the chat.
Ha.
Daruk left the chat.
FUCKERS.
Teba left the chat.
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Time to Wake Up
And more. This is the last one tho. What a ride. @eradition also, kinda sorta spoilers for the game at the end. Sorta.
———-
Link and Kari traveled to the last Divine Beast, Vah Naboris, on horseback as swiftly as they could. They stopped at a nearby stable for the night only to leave their horses behind and travel on foot to the Kara-Kara Bazaar. Kari chuckled, remembering when she first met Urbosa. She was wounded from a fight before entering the bazaar only for Urbosa to find her, bandage her up, and take her home.
“–ri?” Link called.
“Hah?”
“You okay? You kinda spaced out there.” Link asked, a bit worried about her.
Kari nodded. “I’m fine. Just feeling a bit nostalgic. It’s been over a hundred years since I’ve been here.” Kari gave a small smile. “Nothing’s really changed now that I look closely.” She giggled happily. The two went to the town, only to have Link be turned away due to the no voe rule. But Kari was allowed in. Link was left to find a way in on his own while Kari got information. She looked around and saw so many places that made her remember hanging out with Urbosa, or just doing her own thing. The shops, the open areas. It made her happy that it was all so familiar. Then she saw something near the center of town. A large carving on the ground of the town’s center. Kari gulped when she relized what it was. A carving of her symbols, which were shaped like waning crescent moons. A little explanation was written off to the side.
“This symbol is in remembrance of Champion Urbosa’s adoptive child, Kari. The girl who froze herself in time to prevent an enemy from threatening the champions from a possible early defeat. May she forever be remembered by the gerudo people and maybe even across all of Hyrule.” Kari gulped and stared at the carving for a while.
“Sav’aaq.” A woman called upon seeing the child staring at the ground. Kari looked up.
“Ah, Sav’aaq.” She replied fluently, startling the woman slightly.
“So fluent. Ah, sorry. I don’t meet many Sheikah vai who are that fluent with our language. Much less a child.”
Kari giggled. “I can only imagine.” She smiled kindly.
“I just came by to see if you wanted me to further explain the–” The woman gasped and widened her eyes slightly upon seeing the symbol on the child’s forehead, which was also on her torso, back, backs and palms of her hands, and tops and bottoms of her feet. That same symbol depicted on the ground. “P-pardon, what might be your name, young vai?”
“Kari.” She smiled. The woman widened her eyes more and bowed. “H-hey, n-no need to bow miss. But, Sarqso for the gesture.”
The woman stood. “My apologies. I-I just never thought I’d ever meet someone such as you.”
Kari smiled nervously. “Mama must’ve bragged about me while I was frozen. I swear to Hylia mama you can be a bit dramatic… She must’ve missed me. Can’t blame her.” She thought and sighed.
“Would you mind coming with me? I believe there is someone you should meet.” The woman escorted Kari to the chief’s house happily. There she was introduced to Riju.
“So, you are Kari. I’ve heard stories about you from my mother. She from her mother and so on.” She smiled kindly. “I never thought I would actually meet you. You are spoken of highly throughout the whole gerudo race to this day.”
“Oh boy, mama seriously. Even after one hundred years you still manage to embarrass me.” Kari chuckled shyly. “W-wait. If you heard stories of me through your mother, and she before her… Nah, probably just rumor or spread of the stories.”
“If you are suggesting that Lady Urbosa and I are related, then yes. Though, you would have been the younger sister to my ancestor. Urbosa’s birth daughter left on a journey to find a husband long before you arrived in Kara-Kara Bazaar and met Lady Urbosa.” Riju giggled. “Anyway, I suppose your fight with that follower of ganon went well? Core, am I right?”
Kari, who was still shocked she had an older sister at some point, shook her head. “N-no.” She replied. “Well, I dunno. When I unfroze from energy loss Link managed to chase him off since I had gotten weak. It’s hard maintaining a small area frozen in time. I’m surprised I stayed that way for so long.” She sighed.
Riju hummed. “Well, that is no good. But at least you are alive. That is something to be grateful for.” Kari nodded bitterly.
“I mean… I guess…” She replied. “Anyway, I’m here to get information on how to calm Naboris. Mama’s trapped there and I gotta help her.” Riju chuckled.
“I’ve heard of how determined you are, it’s very infectious.” The Gerudo Chief informed. Kari blushed. “Anyway, I know of a few things. It can’t be reached on foot so a sand-seal would be best for this trip. And since it uses lightning, you will not be able to get too close to it unless you want to be struck down on the spot.” She informed. That was when another vai walked in. Kari stared at the vai and sighed.
“… Looks good on him. Blue really brings out his eyes. Though he’s wearing it rather sloppily.” She thought, eyeing the disguised hero. Riju swiftly found out about Link’s identity and decided to have him stay, since he could calm Naboris. She gave them more information on how to approach the divine beast, using an item called the thunder helm, which could protect them from the lightning. However, the two would have to get it from the Yiga clan, who stole it from them. So, the two set out to get it. While exiting the building, Kari wrote something down on a piece of paper after hearing a woman pleading for help from a guard nearby. Something about her husband being ill and needing Molduga guts to cure him. Kari would do this while on the way to the Yiga clan hideout.
Not long later, the two encountered one. “Kari, seriously?!”
“Shut it, I won’t be long!” Kari called and raced towards the giant beast, swiftly killing it with a few hard hits from ranged attacks. It took her about thirty minutes to kill the beast, grab the guts and other items, and head back to Link.
“And you complain about my side quests.” Link huffed.
“Hey, this one was to save a man’s life. Yours were mainly about giant horses, rupees, and shrines.”
“Hey don’t hate my horse! He’s giant and strong and can easily plow through enemies!”
Kari rolled her eyes. “Yeh, and he’s also slow and doesn’t listen well.”
“Venice doesn’t listen. You even did that quest to get him.”
“Hey, Venice and I get along just fine thank you! Just because I bash you about your love for side quests doesn’t mean you can bash my horse!” The girl growled.
“Fine, fine. I will admit, I do more quests than you. But it does keep a stable income, so you shouldn’t complain too much.”
Kari grumbled. “Fine.” She looked around. “I think we’re close.” She mumbled and put her guard up. The two managed to sneak in and snoop around. They then found a secret area that held the leader, called Kohga. The three fought, ending in a victory for Link and Kari. They left, grabbing all of the Yiga clan’s loot along the way and their mighty bananas as well. Once finished they left back for town Kari gave the guts the woman who gave Kari three hundred rupees in return and said she would name her child after her, if she ever had one. Kari blushed at the outcome and watched the woman run off to get her things to head back to her husband. After that Link and Kari gave the helm back to Riju, who used it to help Kari and Link get on Naboris.It took some time, but the two managed to get on the divine beast and look around. Kari smiled widely as a memory resurfaced.
“Mama, what’s it like being a champion?”
“Hmm? Why do you ask?”
“It seems hard. I mean, it’s a lot of pressure, yeh?”
“Well, yes, it is a lot of pressure. The lives of so many people are riding on my and everyone else’s shoulders.”
“Sounds stressful. But you show so much passion in doing it.”
“Yes, it is stressful, but it is worth it. … Kari, listen to me. When you find something you are passionate about promise me one thing. Go for it. Full force. Put all of your passion, energy, everything into it. Work hard, be smart, be brave, don’t be afraid to take risks. But also take care of yourself and stay healthy. If you are truly passionate about something, the stress won’t really matter in the long run. You’ll hit rough patches and sometimes it will be hard, that is true for life. But that will make it much sweeter when you succeed.”
“I promise! If I ever find something like that I’ll work hard at it! Just like you, mama.”
“That’s my Vehvi.”
“Hey, Mama.”
“Yes hun?”
“You’re lap is super comfy.”
“Haha! It’s like a bed to you, isn’t it? I mean, you are rather small.”
“AM NOT! I’M A GIANT!”
Kari chuckled happily at the memory. “… I’ll work hard, mama.” She mumbled.
“Well, well, well. Link, I was wondering when you’d show.” Urbosa’s voice echoed followed by a gasp. “K-kari?!” She sounded surprised and relieved, yet also worried.
“Mama, I’m here. Don’t worry, Link and I will free you! I promise!” She called out and rushed onward with Link, getting the maps and terminals like with the other divine beasts then going to the last terminal. Kari narrowed her eyes, stopping Link before he activated the main terminal. “Link, if things follow the same pattern as the last three divine beasts.” Kari’s eyes showed pure rage. “Then I will take this enemy down. Alone. Please.” Link gulped and sighed.
“Kari… Just, please be careful. Okay?”
Kari chuckled. “If push comes to shove I’ll just freeze myself again for a while so you can kill it.” She replied.
Link sighed in defeat. “Please don’t let it come to that.”
“We’ll see.” Kari shrugged and Link activated the terminal. An enemy formed and Link took cover while Kari stood her ground, ready to fight.
“Kari, that is Thunder Blight Ganon. It is insanely fast, so be on your guard.”
The sheikah child nodded. “Hey!” Kari called. “You may be strong, but I’m stronger!” She roared, her eyes forming three silver rings around her pupils which were now slits. “Because I have a reason to fight!” Kari vanished and reappeared behind the beast, only to have it zip away. It then raced back to strike the girl, but she blocked and attacked with her scarf ends in the forms of blades. Kari was doing her best to keep up with the beast’s speed. Attacking, dodging, blocking, doing everything she could to avoid much damage. It eventually started to use metal pillars as lightning rods to get the girl down. Kari gulped and did her best to avoid the attacks, but she was struck last second by one of the attacks.
“KARI!” Urbosa called as the child yelped in pain. Kari laid on the ground for a moment, eyes wide as a bit of static circulated her body. Thunder Blight Ganon approached the child to finish her off. “KARI, GET UP!” Urbosa called. Link rushed in to attack, but was quickly shoved away by the enemy.
Kari groaned and shakily stood as Thunder Blight Ganon raised its sword to attack. The child smirked. “I’m not d-dyin here. N-not in front of mama. She won’t have to feel that pain again.” Kari managed, gripping her scarf. Both ends pierced through Thunder Blight Ganon and swiftly ripped through it, upward, killing it instantly. Kari gasped and stood on both feet while Link sighed in relief and reclaimed Naboris from Ganon.
Urbosa’s spirit then approached the two. Upon seeing Kari she gulped and raced to her. Kari did the same. The two cried and did their best to calm each other. “Kari, my sweet Kari. Are you okay? You’ve been eating enough, right? You look a bit skinny. Nothing broken? Are you warm or cool enough?” Urbosa asked.
“I’m okay Mama. Nothing’s broken. Link’s been making sure I eat enough. Yes I’m cool enough. And I’ve been this skinny for a while. It might be a temporary side effect of being frozen in time for so long.” Kari replied with a sniffle.
Urbosa sighed solemnly. “I-I’m so sorry you had to see me like this. I thought our reunion would be different.”
Kari sniffled, wiping her nose on her sleeve. “I-it’s okay mama. I’m-I’m just happy to see you, even if it’s just your spirit. But… I’m also sad because I’ll never be able to hug you again a-and you’ll move on without me eventually.”
Urbosa gulped sadly, collecting herself before speaking again. “Just because I’m dead physically does not make me dead permanently, Kari.” The child blinked out of confusion. “Someone only truly dies when they are forgotten. Not when they are killed. That person lives on in the memory of others. That is why I told stories about you to the gerudo people and to those who would listen. So, in my heart and theirs, you lived on. I was unsure back then if you were… physically gone. I knew you were just frozen but I was not sure if that would last, so I did what I thought was best.” Kari teared up and hiccuped.
“Aw, mama. Sarqso.” She smiled and hiccuped. “S-Sarqso.” She repeated.
Urbosa smiled happily as she saw her daughter’s pure smile for the first time in one hundred years. “You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.”
“I can only imagine.” Kari replied, wiping her eyes and nose again. Link sighed.
“Hey, uh, hate to break it to you guys. But we gotta go.”
Kari looked up at Link. “Ya know. I’ll stay here and talk with mama. You can go back and do those quests and shrines and all that. Okay? I… I wanna catch up with mama. Tell that to Riju too, I think she wanted to talk with me some more when shr had the chance.” Kari informed then approached Link and handed him a whistle. “Here. I made this myself. It has my power imbued in it so when you blow it I’ll hear you wherever you are and warp to you. Only use it when you’re about to fight Ganon, okay?” She informed and smirked. “Because I wanna help bring down the man or beast or whatever responsible for all of this.” She said. Link nodded and took the whistle.
“Got it. You take care of yourself. Okay?” Link smiled and waved goodbye to the two. Urbosa drove Naboris to a good spot to lock onto the castle and crossed her arms. Once that was done she sat down with Kari with a smile.
“So, where should I start? Oh I know, so I woke up about three months ago and–” Kari began telling Urbosa her adventures she had with Link happily. Making gestures and a few jokes and enjoying the time she had left with her mother. Eventually the time came when the two had to part ways so Kari could defeat Ganon with Link. It was a long and hard battle, but they won barely. As for Core, he was not seen or heard from. He must have fled when Ganon was sealed again. But, he might return when Ganon threatens Hyrule once again.
Years had passed since Ganon’s defeat. Kari was living in Zora’s domain with her husband, Sidon. She was now technically one hundred and twenty seven. She had gained a good amount of muscle from fights in the past and training as well as a few scars. Things were peaceful now, still a few monsters here and there, but still overall not as bad as they were. Everything was going well with Hyrule now.
“Mama!” A young voice called behind the sheikah woman as she walked home from training.
“Mama, mama!” Another voice called. The woman turned and smiled. A young gerudo girl and a young rito boy raced to her side. “Mama, what’s for dinner?” The rito boy asked with a smile.
“Not sure. How about you two help me decide?”
“I wanna eat something with volt fruit in it!” The gerudo girl giggled happily, her long hair flowing in the gentle breeze and her piercing teal eyes shimmered in the light of the sunset.
Kari chuckled and the rito boy huffed, ruffling his silver and white feathers. “No way, those are gross!” He stuck out his tongue in disgust while his sky blue eyes squinted slightly.
“Says you, Revba! Volt fruits are delicious!” The gerudo girl stuck her tongue out at her brother in a taunting manner.
“Stop that!” The rito boy growled, apparently named Revba, while ruffling his feathers more.
Kari chuckled and sighed. “Alright, settle down you two. Urboha, don’t antagonise your brother, you know how he hates it. Now come on, you are both helping me with dinner.”
“Yes mama.” The two called in unison, following the sheikah woman happily.
“Hey, hey mama.” Urboha called happily while pulling up her long hair into a high, floofy ponytail. “Tell us about granny Urbosa again while we cook! Please!”
“No, no, tell us about Great Uncle Revali!” Revba called while trying to flatten his feathers to the way he liked them. Kari rolled her eyes at the two.
“How about I tell you something else? Your father and I thought about adopting two more kids. A goron and a Zora. Maybe a third, a hylian. But nothing is certain.”
“Really?! Awesome!” Revba chuckled, a wide smile on his face. “I can’t wait to have a little sibling!”
Urboha smiled. “Yay, more siblings!” Kari giggled at her children’s happiness. “Hey, are we gonna see Uncle Link and Aunt Zelda any time soon? Or Uncle Yunobo? Or Aunt Riju? Or even Uncle Teba and Aunt Saki?”
“I dunno. Maybe. Your aunts and uncles are very busy you know. So if they can visit, I’m sure they will let us know.” Kari smiled. “Right, let’s get cooking. My mama taught me this recipe so it should be delicious.” Kari smiled and cooked with her two children, telling them stories about the champions from so long ago while doing so.
You’ve grown so much, Kari. I’m proud of the vai you’ve become.
#//i cry#urbosa#kari#kari named her gerudo daughter after urbosa#and her rito son after revali#her zora child will be named after mipha#and her goron child after daruk#aaah!#link#zelda#revali#teba#mipha#sidon#riju#daruk#yunobo#eradition#time to wake up
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time for MORE ZELDABLOGGING hell yeah today’s stream of consciousness:
i’ve decided that i wanna go south bc like im never gonna catch up with my brother and im Not in the mood to do heat-resistence stuff so i might as well see a thing he hasn’t, right?!
if i get too bored i can always turn around and go north!!
furthermore he’s getting closer to hyrule castle and i dont wanna lol
fast traveled to the dueling peaks and found the tower already
ooh and lake hylia is south as well! tho ofc im doing the southeast one first
and i’ll probably get tired of storyless exploring before i get out that far hahaha
wow the tower is close to the border, i can see the lake hylia province from here
there’s an Immense palm tree lookin jungle and i think i see a giant armos?
but the mountains divide it pretty neatly so it looks to be an easy walk assuming those guardian statues don’t move
ah. of course they move.
at least they can’t get up and walk around :|
too bad you can’t play around in the menu while you wait out rain. i’d rewatch m memories and shit
i climbed this one red looking cliff and the sky went green and the weather changed to all cloudy forever so im probably about to die
and just like that, glided to the tower. easy peasy
ah, the faron province!! cooool
ah wow!! it’s bigger than i realized *w*
watching a lightning storm from one of these towers is fucking terrifying
that lightning does Not fuck around
the maddening thing about this game is seeing so much cool shit in the distance and you can’t check it out yet, or it would be such hard work
i see some glowy shit and a giant pink tree and i wanna explore everything but also it’s so Much
it’s kind of creepy out here :/ maybe i want to go do story after all lol
im ging back to the shrine you hang glide off of so i can start from somewhere familiar >_>
idk why im so cautious playing this game. like. its a game. its not like it can hurt me
im having trauma flashbacks looking at eventide island
wait is this a
i hear town music!!! omg omg
PEOPLE ;_;
ohhhh my gosh what a beautiful peaceful beachside town
reminds me of bodhum/new bodhum and bits and piece of ff11, which i say with the greatest reluctance
i love everyone in this village just bc they are here
oh god it’s so beautiful i love beaches so much i want to live here
oh my gosh there’s a gerudo here!!!!!! OH MY GOD I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU SINCE MM TALK TO ME
she’s asleep in the inn lol
oh hey the painter dude is here too
some of these hylian npcs are poc which is so do cool and overdue
ooh a chest game
i lost lmao
OH MY GOD
the gerudo lady is awake and she is. so tall oh my god
im gay
i am Gay
I Am Gay
oh, man. oh man
are they all so beautiful. so Strong. good god
i wish this village was bigger i could have happily stayed here for hours
omg
someone a long time ago was standing on a mountain that looked like a broken heart and was like, is this not the place to find your soulmate…? but i haven’t found mine yet
someone mentioned a similar legend here and on the map i see a mountain with a whole heart on it pfffft
im so sick of seeing these stone cirlces everywhere…i can’t blow them up..what do you DO with them? complete the pattern maybe??
oh my god it worked
i’ve passed by so many…how will i ever get all these seeds……..
i know the game wants me to sail here but i hate sailing, it’s tedious, i want to control my boat with the fucking control stick
holy fuck dude the sword im using is so strong?? it cut down a palm in a single swipe!!
the longer i play the more i hate the blood moon
oh no i found a hinox
i was going to avoid him but he has an orb….
idk where it goes tho so there’s no point there’s no point the blood moon will bring him back okay Okay
hes a red one anyway so no big, when the time comes
oh my god ANOTHER hinox with an orb
i bet they go to the twin shrines near the village
but i’m supposed to find a tablet before i do that…….i don’t wanna skip another quest like the zora helm also thats a Long walk jesus christ
NNNONONONO GOD
GUARDIAN THAT CAN WALK OVER THERE NO FUCKING THANKS SO GLAD IT DIDN’T SEE ME
so fucking glad
exploring is so dangerous Why
why do i suck SO much at combat
oooh a bokoblin camp with a black mobiln :/ Yikes
aaand bomb arrows takes care of THAT
i love seeing farosh flying around here but i can NEVER CATCH HIM
i was just a few minutes too late to getting him at a really good spot
but the dragons seem to take the same route over 24h, so there’s that
oh hey im back at green cloud plateau
okay Um am i crazy or did i just hear something roar? was that the wind??
oh god i see a question mark from here something already knows im close
oh ogd oh god why i bet it’s big and awful
IT’S A LYNEL LOL
i dont have any healing or defense stuff no way
oh no i think there’s a shrine up there where he is ): but i can’t get it
AND A HINOX RIGHT NEXT TO HIM? NO THANKS LOL
jesus i knew i’d die here
at least there’s no orb on this one
oh noooo more lightning god the storms here are brutal
omg i found shelter behind a waterfall and there’s the shrine i was sensing!! yes!!!!!
holy fuck im not safe here either i nearly just got fried
in the shrine we go holy shit
may the weather be better when i get out
damn i keep finding ore today… #blessed
I SAW FAROSH AGAIN HE WAS SO CLOSE BUT I WAS STILL TOO SLOW…okay they DEFINITELY take the same route everyday i think
or at least if not at the same time, the same places
ugh i went over to this one place and the weather turned to all lightning forever
KASS? HOLY SHIT DUDE YOU’RE GONNA GET FRIED
im so glad to see him ;_; it’s creepy out here
uh…i think…i have to get struck by lightning…on this hill…oh my god i’ll die???
maybe my lightning rod will work……? please…………..?
aaaaand it did nothing. great. ok
/saves game
……../dons metal armor weapons and shield
LMAO IT WORKED HOLY SHIT
oh my god im alive!!!! i had mipha’s grace just in case but i took an electric elixir
jesus FUCK
yes nice i didnt even have to do anything just get the…chest…….
B R O
i got rubber tights!!! electric resistance!!!!! NICE
ah and when i came out the storm was over :3
but kass is gone ): i wanted to tell him i figured out his song!!!
i knew i should have talked to him before i went in :/
lol i find a boat after playing in the water for 100 years…..not that i wouldve used it, but
aw i met and saved a traveling couple, i’ve saved them before
oh my gosh a STABLE!! all the way out here!!!!
THERE ARE PEOPLE
man i wondered what that couple was doing out in such a remote place
oh wow beedle gave me a single ancient arrow…apparently it deals huge damage even to guardians
maybe this is what the start screen meant by the right tools!!!!
but there’s only one…
robbie from akkala gave it to him…NICE i’ll remember
ah some guy here said there was something glowing at the top of floria waterfall…i gotta check that out
ooh a shrine back here too…nice
god there’s a chest in here that’s REALLY hard to get bc camera angles but it has an ancient core (looked it up) and i need one to upgrade my runes………smh
man…nah. im out. there will be other cores & this is crazy ridiculous
its just the stasis rune anyway and i use that one the least
five big hearty radishes means TWENTY FIVE EXTRA HEARTS
but you can only have a max of 30 lol so
AAAH HERE COMES FAROSH AND IM FINALLY AHEAD OF WHERE HE’LL BE OH MY GOD
I HIT HIM I HIT HIM
I FINALLY GOT A SCALE
almost died for it but. i got it. he throws electricity involuntarily and it’s major stuff i shoulda worn my rubber gear
i kinda wanna wait and see if i can get another……..but i have shit to do
holy shit farosh came back around & i got another scale…wish i could hit his horn
AAAH NO A GIANT STONE THING IS HERE….i have no idea how to fight them im leaving
well idk if the stone thing or the dragon or the shrine was what was supposed to be glowing up here but i don’t see anything new
im almost done exploring this province, actually
gotta walk along one beach and climb the heart mountain and that’s it!
a little tempted to grab my horse since it’s such an easy direct road, but i’d be getting on and off all the time ):
fml there’s a guardian on this beach…pls dont move pls dont pls dont
oh thank god its stuck in the sand
omg there was a chest in the sand but it WASNT A CHEST it was one of those yellow octoroks!!!! but!! i shot it! and got money!!!!!!!! #nice
NOOOO another stone thing!!
but you know the last one took a lot of damage from one accidental bomb so maybe
how do you fight it?? i can’t damage it???
OH OMG THE ORE THING!!! OKAY LET’S DO THIS SHIT let’s go i cooked up so much good food
oh my god i took him down in just a handful of bomb arrows…THATS what ive been running from?
not nearly as scarly as lynel tbh
and i’ve been marking the minibosses on my map so now i can look for jewels there if i ever need to
i found a fuckton in this region but lol i sold them all
i know one great fairy needs 10k rupees and like…..Yikes
im getting pretty good with my bow, i can hit far off targets bc i know how high to aim and shit
i’ve kind of been wondering what happens if you get to the edge of the map
but the wind gets so strong on the beaches i bet you just either run out of stamina if swimming or can’t make the boat get past it if sailing
but what happens if you get to a land edge though…?
i actually dislike getting to edges of maps haha it creeps me out. that disreality unrealization shit. no thanks
in la noire the edges of the map have u-turn streets and you realize the cars are all just on one endless track and no one is in them and no one ever goes home and you start to wonder if this actual universe is a simulation and it freaks you out
anyway.
omfg someone from the yiga clan selling bananas like i actually could have bought some if i wanted LMAO
he actually had me fooled for a moment even though i know what npcs named “traveler” mean
why do they all give me bananas when they die anyway………whats going on with this.
oh my god this dude at the heart shaped pond is in love with this gerudo lady here. and like. same oh my god she’s so Big
but lol you can choose to say “yeah talk to her” or “nope, rival time!”
me: aggressively wants to flirt with the gerudo lady but not in a straight way
pls this cutscene was so cute
but she deserves better than a weirdo like this guy
he like, gave me a twenty, and she fussed at him for being stingy, so then he have me a hundred, and THEN
HE ASKED FOR HIS MONEY BACK LMFAO no way fucknuts
wow and with that im All Done with this province O:
i mean yeah i got quests and shrines to come back and do, but i’ve SEEN everything, yk
maybe now i’ll go up to death mountain haha i feel so slow ): i hope what i saw and did made up for my slow story progress
whoa this weapons guy said he’d remake mipha’s trident if i ever broke it!! what a relief
ah i finally figured out the shrine puzzle by zora’s domain…gotta give that thing a dragon scale. but i like my dragon scales too much so i won’t. maybe later
oh hey the death mountain region tower! that was easy
uhhh what…is that
oh my god a FLYING GUARDIAN are you KIDDING me??? why???????
and they’re everywhere! fantastic!!! my ass is DEAD
oh okay this region is called akkala
at least i get guardian arrows here eventually :|
oh my god ONE SAW ME FUCK
oh my god
I RAN UP TO THE TOWER AND IT’S COVERED IN THE BLIGHT
what is that thing crawling all over death mountain?!
what is happening OH my god!!! so much!! everything!!! all at once!!!!!!!!
wait
that’s the divine beast
oh my god
oh my god.
oh my god it’s so big but even still it looks tiny in comparison to the mountain, oh my god
omg it gets cold up here only at night?? omg
NO there’s a still guardian up here too ;_;
i’m gonna try to kill it!!! good first try it can’t move and there’s cover RIGHT here
second try really but im stronger now
now, i have bomb arrows and lightning rods
ok lightning rod does nothing, bomb arrows dont work in the rain, but i killed it with shock arrows!!
and it wasnt v hard bc i was behind cover the whole time lol
but like, with those arrows - i used maybe 9 or 10? and that was all i used, i threw a couple of bombs at it too i guess
now to figure out how i even get IN here w/ all this gunk…..
fuck a bokoblin near a cooking pot saw me and accidentally set itself on fire lmao
ok i can’t climb past the blight, i tried, but how the fuck do i get rid of it i dont see any eyeballs )))):
……………………….w ait
this bokoblin has a shield with the hylian crest on it. the HYLIAN crest
these ruins have the red carpet with the double line of gold on the side
i’m crying this was someplace special
i don’t know what it was bc it can’t be the temple of time or hyrule castle but it was someplace real i recognize the style of it so faintly and it’s COVERED IN BLIGHT
oh my god………..this is so Much
ah ok a beam fell when i shot the first eyeball and i was like why arent there anymore?? but apparently i can magnesis it
oh wow i found a piece of a room…….totally trashed, jesus christ
must’ve been a lab or library
omg its thundering outside…..that has nothing to do with zelda but it makes this creepier
THERE’S A GUARDIAN AT THE TOP SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME
its not alive tho thank christ
jesus fuck the divine beast is SO BIG and the mountain is still SO MUCH BIGGER i feel so tiny every time i look
anyway it’s 5am and there’s lightning so i gotta unplug for many reasons, this is a fine stopping place, can’t wait to get my ass kicked by that thing and rescue a goron, holy fuck
#loz blogging#botw spoilers#not too spoiler heavy bit a lil bit#personal#snap story incoming#this storm is gonna be a real humdinger#i worry all the time about my aunt's outdoor feral cat colony ):
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I had a cursed thought and now you are gonna deal with it.
Y’know how Yigas have long ass torsos that kinda make them look like they’re supposed to be running on all fours?
Yeah. CAN YIGAS SUCK THEIR OWN DICKS??? I FEEL LIKE THEYRE FLEXIBLE ENOUGH???
*reads this*
UGH. FINE. fucking shit, I open my inbox and you fuckheads give me THIS to work with. Fuck.
You know what it was like, being a member of the yiga clan? It was great! A cool hideout, plenty of bananas, and plenty of hot guys to look at. Well. That was also a con. Why? Because he couldn't fuck any of them. Not because he was just a low class yiga (though it definitely didn't help), but because everyone was busy as shit. Everyone was preparing for Sooga and Kohga's trip to who the fucks cares, and no one would give him the time of day. Sure it was selfish, but fuck, you had more sausages around here then a fucking deli, does stuff to a guy.
"Alright, come on, surely you can find ONE guy who needs a load off."
He looked around the busy main area, trying to see if someone was slutty and or desperate enough. Then he saw him. Von. Aka, the guy that needs to fuck or he'll die, like some perverted Shark. He fucks upper and lower class yiga, hell, he even fools around with recruits who aren't even a yiga just yet. He was no Kohga, surely, but what idiot waits around for gold when you snag a bunch of silver now? He was about to check himself out in the mirror, when he recalled the mask.
"Right. That's. Not a thing I gotta worry about- hey! Von!"
He quickly walked up to him as he was in the middle of carrying some boxes. Von looked at him and nodded as he set it down.
"Hey little man. What's up?"
"Wellll, I know you're working, but I thought, hey, how great would it be if I could get some tension out of those big shoulders of yours? We could do it in your room, or, even on this box, fuck it."
He leapt up onto the crate, arms outstretched as if he was expecting the other to be impressed. Von took a hold of his hips, and he thought he was gonna get it good, when he just lifted him off, and onto the floor.
"Raincheck, buddy. I gotta get all these supplies in, or Sooga is gonna kill me. You gotta find someone else, at least for tonight."
He grumbled, folding his hands over his chest.
"Ugh, no fair. Everyone else is busy."
"Sorry, I know what you mean. But you got your shot with SOMEONE."
He looked around, before back at Von, shrugging.
"How about Cil? He's a loser."
Von looked at him as if he grew a second head, before barking in laughter.
"HA. You and Cil? No. Watch, imma show you what it's like trying to get in that suit- Yo Cil! Me, you, closet, twenty minutes!"
Cil was on the other side of the room, making notes for Sooga. A few clan members watched the exchange, especially since Cil didn't even look up from his notes in order to respond.
"Get fucked by a pitchfork, Von."
"Love you!!!"
"Get fucking rabies."
Von motioned to Cil, before grabbing another box, shrugging.
"See? If I can't fuck that, YOU can't fuck that. Looks like it's just you and your hand tonight, bud."
He groaned, choosing to just walk out of this situation entirely, and making his way to his room. Well, it was more of a group room, but as it was empty at the moment, he deemed it his. Only upper class yiga got their own rooms, the rest of them slept together in huge rooms with many many beds. He had only a shelf of stuff to his name, same as everyone else. At least he had a rare moment of privacy. He hopped into bed, sighing.
"Alright, alright. Let's get this over with."
He whipped himself out, and started to pump his cock. It was a slow, lazy touch that was doing nothing for him. He was horny, but his hand didn't seem to get the goddamn memo. He sat there for who knows how long, before he groaned, face palming.
"This is stupid. You know you need more."
He did. He needed a mouth. Something wet, something hot. Unfortunately, even the ones that liked it in their sleep, seemed to be busy as shit. What to do, what to do. Then, he had an idea. An awful idea. He looked around, making sure no one was there to see this. He then looked at his cock. Not totally flaccid, not totally hard, but he knew he wanted a chance to cum. Just one.
"I mean...it's not weird if it's yours. Right?"
Ugh, at this point, who cared. He lifted his legs and lower body as far as he could, till he was face to face with his own dick. One benefit of being a yiga? It made your body flexible as SHIT.
"I need to trim at some point."
He was more or less stalling. Because this wasn't something guys...usually did. Maybe someone like Von. Actually...that was kinda hot to think about. Big, strong man like that, sucking his cock ravenously. The thought made his own twitch, and he grumbled.
"Alright, alright, I hear you."
He had to hold onto his lower back and sit up a bit simultaneously, so it wasn't totally comfortable, but the second he felt the breath against his tip, he realized it was worth it. He put the tip in his mouth, and the sensation was...weird. he could simultaneously feel the shock up his spine, and the drool accumulating in his mouth. He pushed himself further in, getting so excited, he took himself halfway in, slowly starting to push himself in and out of his mouth.
And he realized he liked this. The fact that he could control a cock so freely? It was incredible. Not some toy, but a real, full fledged dick, pulsing in his mouth. He shoved it in further, getting so riled up, he was taking it fully, balls against his chin, and not even fully realizing it. He just knew that he liked the work, liked how he had to contort his body to self satisfy. He bet he looked hot. He bet if some big, beefy, blade master caught him, he'd touch himself to this.
He hadn't been so close so quickly before. His head was empty, drool cascaded down his chin and his front. It felt good. It tasted good. Before he knew it, he was practically fucking his own skull, bucking against his mouth till he hit the back of his throat. Oh the way he gagged, the way he was so hard on himself, desperately using himself as a fucktoy. Then, he came. It felt good, feeling himself throb as cum ran down his throat. Sure, he came while someone's dick dumped a load in him, that wasn't new. It was feeling him and only him do it simultaneously, THAT was fucking magical.
He, very slowly, pulled himself out of his mouth, letting his body go limp, before he coughed, wiping his mouth free of cum and drool. He sat there, looking at his satisfied length, before just staring up at the ceiling.
"I. I sucked my own dick. Can we all do that? Is THIS A THING?"
Fueled by the thought of a group of yiga's sucking their own dicks, especially for him to watch, nearly leapt up out of his bed, to share the news to his friends.
#asks#lemon#yiga#dont worry i know this was more of just a funny idea#i just felt like#personally obligated to do something with it#and this poor yiga#i gave him a new kink and he doesn't know how to handle#smh
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If you are taking asks and are not overwhelmed at the moment, I have a request: I could use some wholesome BFF stuff with Kohga and Mipha. I haven't seen my bestie since before covid since travel is still meh and man, my heart could use some friends stuff. Especially if it's Mipha being a good sis and caring for/hugging her stupid Yiga bestie, because I miss hugging and taking care of my own bestie 😭
We can ABSOLUTELY get you that, dear anon!
"Are you sure about this?"
"Are YOU sure about this?"
They agreed to do something unique for their next BFF date. They decided to do some kind of outfit swap, handmade by each other. Granted, Kohga struggled and needed help from Sooga to make it, but after weeks of work, they finally made it happen. They were at the yiga clan base, dressing in separate rooms. Mipha looked over at herself, uncertain. Definitely not a look she'd ever thought of sporting.
"I suppose...do you have everything on, Kohga, or do you need help?"
"I got it, I got it. Okay, ready?"
"On three. One. Two."
"Three!"
They both stepped out of the room, and took a minute to look each other over. There was uncertainty. Confusion. Then suddenly they were holding each other's hands, jumping in place.
"Oh you look so CUTE!!"
"YOU look so cute! Oh my Ganon, twirl for me girl, twirl for me!"
Kohga held onto her hand as he twirled her. Now, he was as gay as they came, but he had to admit, the yiga outfit made this girl's body look GOOD. Slim frame, itty bitty waist, and just the cutest little butt you've ever seen. She giggled in embarrassment, hiding her face in her yiga mask.
"Oh hush! YOU'RE the one who looks so good! You're right, red really WAS your color! Oh you'd make a FINE Zora prince! It looks delightful!"
Kohga looked at himself, looking smug as hell.
"I DO look good, don't I? Damn I look hotter than usual! Good work, Mipha!"
Aside from him keeping his yiga mask, he was pretty much in the perfect suit of armor. He even undid his usual man bun, for the sake of the helm. Kohga turned around to show Mipha her own handiwork (aka his ass), head huge in pride.
"SERIOUSLY. My ass looks GOOD in these."
Mipha giggled, covering her giggles in her hand.
"I'm...glad you like it."
Kohga ducked down to look in between his legs, right at Mipha.
"Hey. What's wrong?"
"I just...well. I want to show my work to Link. I made him his own armor, but I don't...know if he'll like it."
Kohga immediately turned into friendship mode, hands on his hips.
"Mipha I swear to fuck- you know what, come here-"
Kohga suddenly scooped her up In his arms, before taking her right outside. Sooga and Link had been outside, awaiting their respective partners. They seemed to be discussing their weapons, before turning their attention to the two.
"K-Kohga please put me down-"
Kohga did just that, before gesturing to himself wildly.
"Link. Thoughts. Now."
Link gave him a once over, before giving them both a thumbs up. Mipha, embarrassed as hell, covered her face in her mask. Kohga wouldn't let her weasel her way out of this though, and pulled her to his side.
"Right? MIPHA made this. Isn't she just talented?"
Sooga interuppted, still looking at his weapon.
"She DID have a nice frame to work with, Master Kohga. Less we forget."
"See- THIS is how a man compliments you. Like THAT."
Mipha of course, was ever doubtful. Mipha saw it. Kohga it. Everyone did.
"Kohga it's sweet of you, but this is all-"
Kohga knelt down, and after moving her mask from her face, squished her cheeks.
"You. Are the shit. I love you. LINK loves you. I want you, to so BADLY, see how great you are. Do I gotta kill someone to do it? I'll fucking do it, Mipha, test me."
Mipha looked at him, face littered in uncertainty, before she suddenly jumped at him, wrapping her arms around his neck in a hug. Kohga returned it immediately, clearly fighting every urge to not squeeze the life out of her. Sooga chuckled from behind them, clearly feeling the warmth from here.
"How precious. Why, if I didn't know any better, I'd say you've grown soft, Master."
Kohga pulled away from the hug, pointing a finger of accusation at him.
"YOU. Shut your whore mouth. YOU, Link, marry this bitch."
Link nodded, motioning to Sooga. Sooga shrugged.
"I think Link is suggesting a duel wedding. I wouldn't mind it, personally."
"No that's not what I-"
"YES! LINK! We SHOULD have a duel wedding!"
"MIPHA YOU TRAITOR"
#asks#Kohga#Mipha#link#Sooga#link is gonna marry her up dont worry#and kohga would fucking die for mipha TEST HIM.
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I’ve actually been meaning to ask this for a long ass time- temperature shit. Would these fuckers be into temperature play? Because I definitely think Sooga could use some ice cubes on ‘im.
I've NEVER done temp play before? Always been curious about it though? I feel like I'd be into the ice cube things-anyhow lets go!
The Gerudo desert was a hot place. Shocker. But because it was so scalding, it meant the yiga had to adapt to it. The suits alone sometimes didn't do enough, so they had to resort to other measures. Ice cream, chilly elixirs, and of course, ice cubes. The yiga stole a FUCK ton of ice blocks from the gerudo ice house, and the whole clan was reaping the benefits. Including Sooga. Sooga didn't show it, but he didn’t handle the heat so well- he tended to sweat like a whore in church. Kohga personally liked the scalding heat, but that didn't matter.
"Hey idiot. Here."
Sooga looked up from his spot on the floor (he was trying to meditate to forget how shitty he was feeling), suddenly getting smacked in the face with a cold, wet towel. Sooga chuckled, moving it from his face, and around his neck. He immediately looked less miserable.
"Thank you, Master Kohga. Truly."
"Yeah yeah, I know you hate the heat. You always try to fucking hide it, it's stupid."
Kohga sat right next to him on the floor, setting a tray down between them. A bucket of ice cubes, and two banana pops. Sooga took one of the banana pops, gratefully putting it in his mouth.
"Surprised you’re sharing these with me. Usually you hide them."
"You look like you're gonna keel over, so I'll make an exception this once. Enjoy it."
Kohga watched as Sooga helped himself. Maybe it was Kohga being a pervert, but damn did this man look pretty with something in his mouth. He watched as the ice cream dripped right down in between is tits. Sooga swore under his breath, looking around for a rag.
"Apologies, I wasn't paying attention. Do you uhm, have-"
"Eh I got it."
Kohga cupped his chest, before leaning down, and licking it off his chest. He didn't savor it like he'd prefer, but he could tell Sooga just wanted the possible stain off. He nodded in a 'your welcome' gesture, before continuing with his own treat. Sooga sat there, stiff as stone, totally and utterly confused. Kohga motioned towards him.
"Speak."
"I...I liked that. Why did I like that?"
That IS weird. They tried the same thing with whipped cream once, and as delicious as it was, Sooga didn't care for it. So, what made ice cream so different? Kohga thought on it for a second, before an idea came to mind.
"I think...I think I have an idea. If you're not too hot to play."
"Never."
Sooga could be in the middle of fending off loads of monsters, and STILL want to make love to him. He tossed his head back, took the popsicle whole, before peeling the stick away (god DAMN this man made it look effortless). Kohga leaned him against the bed, hand on his chest.
"Tell me how this feels."
Kohga exposed his titties (he COULD do this with his clothes on, but why wouldn't he get a proper view of these puppies??), cupping them in his hands, before latching his lips onto one of his nipples. He squeezed them in his hands as he sucked, watching as Sooga sighed in content. Titty play was more for Kohga, but he did like it fairly well himself.
"It's nice. Everything about you is nice."
Kohga pulled away with a nod.
"Okay, now tell me how THIS feels."
Kohga took an ice cube, put it in his mouth, sloshed it around his mouth for a second, before taking it back out. Sooga cocked his head a bit.
"I'm so confused as to what you're doing-"
Kohga latched his mouth back onto the nipple, and was that reaction BEAUTIFUL. Sooga stiffened on the spot, and his breath hitched yet again. Kohga pulled away, wiping his mouth and laughing.
"Ha! I fucking KNEW it! You ARE into cold shit!"
Sooga looked down at himself, flabbergasted. Nipples hard as hell, and a bulge in his pants.
"I'm...so confused-"
"Doesn't matter. Let's see how badly you need to cool down, big guy."
Kohga didn't let him speak as he crawled into his lap, planting his fatass right onto his bulge, and pressing his lips against his. Maybe it was the heat, maybe because this was was all something new, but when Kohga pressed his lips against his, he felt so much more eager. Wanted so much more of his tongue. Kohga used this as a distraction, pressing the ice cube right against his nipple. Sooga tried to pull away, mainly in surprise, but Kohga kept him still. He kept one hand wrapped around his neck, keeping his cute little thing from running off on him.
"Hey hey. Since when do you get all squirmy?"
Sooga averted his glance, for but a moment.
"It's just. Odd, how much you know. How you...do these weird, new things."
"You say it like it's bad."
"No no, don't-"
He paised for a moment, the coldness of the ice cube still at his nipple cascading dripping down his body. Contrast that to Kohga’s hot, thick ass, it was quite the contrast.
"Don't...misunderstand, I like it. I really do. I just...feel as though I cannot surprise you the same way."
"Always gotta be gushy with you, huh? Sooga, you're sweet. Really sweet. That's what I like about you. You're fun to play with."
Sooga was suddenly on his back, with Kohga’s lips against his own, and his hand. Oh his hand. It made that little cube travel from his nipple, to his stomach, each time making goosebumps form on his skin. Kohga’s body was hot, the air was hot, the towel around his neck was cold, the ice cube was cold. It was a contrast that made his poor little head spin. And that's why Kohga loved his dumbass.
"M-master Kohga, you're-"
"Shhh. You'll like it."
The ever shrinking ice cube cascaded down his perfect stomach (seriously, could fry an egg on this fucker, Kohga loved it), before it glided down to his cock. It was slow, cold, yet, Kohga’s hand was so soft, eager. Sooga was about to say something, when Kohga peeled away from him, putting his finger over his mouth. Silence. Sooga was always so chatty when he was nervous, self concious. Kohga USED to try to talk to him through it, and sometimes he still does, but he found that showing him was far more affective. So, after kissing his forehead (mushy, he knows), he decided to do just that.
He put what was left of the ice cube (if Sooga wouldn't be embarrassed by it, he'd be snapping some pics, because goddamn Sooga looked good when he was wet and ready) in his mouth, and after swallowing, he scooted himself in between his legs, pulling out Sooga’s cock. He didn't hesitate, grabbing his balls, and taking Sooga into his mouth. It must've been like sticking your dick in a freezer, he'd imagined. Sooga went still for a moment, and he thought Sooga didn't like it.
He was wrong. When Sooga felt him trying to pull away, he held onto his head, and used his legs to keep his body in place.
"Stay there. Stay...right there."
Kohga didn't need to be told twice. He slurped and sucked, just how he knew Sooga liked it. Slowly, with his lips wrapped around him firmly and his tongue exploring every inch. Sooga liked his fat tongue, he could tell by the way his toes curled. It was so cute. SOOGA was cute, laying there, letting himself be ravished by the much needed cold. The cold didn't last much longer however. Sooga never did last too long against his mouth, and in just a moment, his hot cum warmed Kohga’s cold mouth. Sooga's grip on him gave way; legs finally freeing him, and his hand flopping onto the floor.
Kohga chuckled, sitting up and wiping the cum from his chin. He'd lick Sooga clean, but he liked how messy and pathetic he looked.
"So, temperature play is something you like, I guess. You feel any better?"
"Y...yes, Master Kohga. Much better. Thank you."
"SOMEONE had to do it. Swear, you're the only Yiga who can't handle the heat."
Kohga finished off the rest of his (now fairly melted pop), watching as Sooga just sat there, limp.
"I can only handle YOURS, Master Kohga."
"Pfft. You flirt. You feel good enough to hop into the bath?"
"...I don't want to leave the floor. Its nice here. Think I'm going to cheat on you with the floor."
"You always did like hardwood."
Sooga looked up at him, in disbelief, before they both snorted like idiots. For a guy who so loved the cold,
He had nothing but a fiery love for his Master.
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We need something with that new tattoo thing you just reblogged, like now
Oh you mean the one I just recently reblogged? done by @gspaepro? lets fucking GO. Also this shit is now canon in design, since I have the permission from them
Yiga rituals were very intricate. Motions and actions done in silence, motions done underneath candlelight and in the shadows. It was why traditional romance just. Didn’t suit their style, their way of life. Stuff like coffee dates, stuff like retiring in a farm, even wedding rings were not very common. It was one of the MANY reasons why it boggled Kohga’s mind, why he thought buying him an expensive ass wedding ring was the way to his heart. Don’t get Kohga wrong, it was a sweet gesture, but it was so...solid, so finite. It made Kohga feel like he’d be boxed in, like a cow behind a fence. He didn’t like it.
“But you still shouldn’t have done that.”
He told himself. It had been years since Sooga attempted a proposal, and just yesterday, he tried again. Kohga was mad at first, but now that he sat here, in his bed, thinking about it, he realized that it wasn’t fair to Sooga. poor guy really poured his heart out to him, only to have it be rejected. It was why he avoided him all day, and had Von watch him in the meantime (usually he reserved that for Cil, but he REALLY didn’t feel like getting hit on right now). He needed to make it up to him. He needed something that wasn’t so ridged as those stones. Then it clicked. He went to the door, and turned to Von, who was laying the flirts on THICK to some foot soldier.
“Von, grab ass later. I need you to summon Sooga for me.”
“Yes, Master Kohga. You, me, your quarters. Tonight.”
He shot the flustered foot soldier a wink, and went off to go get Sooga. Wherever the hell he was. Kohga set everything up, just in time for him to knock at his door.
“Come in.”
Sooga opened the door slowly, helping himself in, and just. Standing there. Poor guy looked so stiff, as if he didn’t practically live in this room.
“Master Kohga, I just wanted to say-”
“Shh. Sit down for me, right here.”
Sooga sat down on the stool right by the bed. There was a silence as Kohga sat down on the bed.
“Sooga, I’m not mad. Okay? I get it. You really, really thought I was ready, after who knows how many years-”
“Three.”
“W-really three years ago? Fucking hell time flies. Anyhow, I’m sorry. I snapped because I was uncomfortable. But you didn’t deserve the way I yelled at you. So, I want to make it up to you.”
Sooga hesitated. He put his arm on the small table, as Kohga motioned for him to do.
“Master Kohga...are you...?”
“Yes. I’m going to give you something better than some stupid ring. Not that it’s stupid, It’s beautiful really. I just. Sooga, it’s not me. I want something that’ll let us BREATHE you know? So. I’m going to SHOW you what you are to me. Not with some rocks. Not with some gold and silver and something you can buy. It’s something I need to show you. Take off your sleeve for me.”
Sooga obeyed. Tattoos were a very intimate, very special part of the Yiga culture. You had to have one JUST to be a Yiga. Anything else done after that were usually done in bouts of passion, to show brotherly connections, to show a friendship unlike any others, or in this case, love. And to get such a sign of affection from his Master? His body was already his to play with.
“You are an artist, Master Kohga. I already boast that I have the most respectable brand out of everyone here.”
“Sounds like you. Idiot.”
He chuckled. Kohga wiped down the arm, just so nothing would get infected. Using a very special type of Yiga ink (that only Kohga was allowed to give for the clan to use. He made it himself, afterall), Kohga seemed to already have an idea in mind, and started to work. Tattoos were painfully slow to do, especially with the design Kohga had in mind. But Sooga didn’t mind. A few hours of pinpricks were worth it, just to be near his Master.
“May I ask...what made you decide to give me such a gift?”
“It felt...feel. The ring kinda...sorta...doesn’t. Feels restrictive. Like a bedazzled leash.”
“That sounds like a gift you WOULD like, though.”
“Shut up, you.”
They both chuckled at that. Sooga sat still, watching as the needle pricked his arm over and over, watched as the needle pushed the ink into his skin. Sooga always LOVED watching him tattoo people, on the rare chances he did so. Such careful, so caring of a touch.
“You know. This reminds me of when I first fell in love with you.”
“How so?”
“When you gave me my first tattoo. The one right on my thigh. I was so...transfixed. Such a strong man, with such a gentle touch.”
“Pfft. I remember that. You were such a string bean back then!”
Kohga chuckled. Those arms weren’t always so huge and bulging, and the rest of his body wasn’t always so meaty.
“I was. I saw nothing wrong with it. That is, until I noticed the man I had affections for, was constantly surrounded by big, bulky men. Suffice to say I was...jealous.”
“Even of Cil?”
“ESPECIALLY of Cil. You two looked so close back then. He was constantly at your hip. I always thought you touched him like this.”
“I mean, I DID do his tattoos. One of them anyway.”
Kohga was careful as he worked, making his motions slow, as if he’d startle Sooga if he moved too fast.
“One? What of the other?”
“He copied the one I did, put it on his other hand.”
“No wonder they always looked so different to me. It lacked the warmth of your style.”
“God you gotta make shit romantic all the time, eh?”
Sooga was so awestruck by the pattern. Lines and curves started to decorate his arms, slowly finding rhyme and reason against his skin.
“I can’t help it. When I’m near you, love is all I think about. You’re...the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
“I get that a lot. Usually four times a week.”
He chuckled. After the lines, Kohga painted what looked to be almost like serpents. He was curious.
“What is the meaning of this design?”
“These lines and shit? They represent stability.”
“And the snakes?”
“Means ‘ties that bond’, essentially. It’s...stupid. But my dad had tattoos like these, kinda.”
“I’m honored to share in the resemblance.”
“I’m gonna add more to it though, If I'm gonna be railing that ass, I don’t wanna think about my old man. Old MEN sure, but not mine.”
Sooga chuckled, shaking his head. His Master had SUCH a way with words. he watched as the lines and curved and snakes soon gave way to the classic Yiga symbol. Done as carefully as the first one had been done. He watched as Kohga carefully, and slowly, added what looked like sickles to the symbol.
“Sickles?”
“It’s more or less Yiga branding. To show where your ties are. Case you somehow forget where you belong.”
“Wouldn’t ever. Even if I had amnesia. I would know in my heart where I belong.”
“Sounds like something stupid you’d say. That’s all your stupid, mushy gushy bullshit.”
Kohga added dots, little criss cross designs, and of course-
“Bananas?”
“....because you’re sweet.”
“And you call ME mushy!”
Sooga threw his head back in laughter, which was cut short as Kohga smacked his arm, making Sooga wince.
“Ow! It’s TENDER, dammit!”
“Then quit makin’ me wanna do it! You moron! And it’s...more than just some stupid lovey shit. See how its one, two, and then one?”
“Yes?”
“That’s...us. Us together. We’re more together. Plentiful. That and I might be kinda hungry.”
“Do you need a break?”
“I’m already being romantic, if I stop now I’m not gonna finish, and this tattoo is gonna look ugly as shit.”
“Unlike you.”
Kohga shook his head, scoffing. Absolute idiot. More criss crosses, more dots. Then something Sooga knew immediately.
“Yeah, it’s your weapon, big guy. You remember when you got it?”
“Yes. You gave it to me, upon announcing my new duty of protecting you. It was such an honor. Such blades being crafted, and for ME.”
“You know, I designed it myself.”
Sooga looked at the blades at his hip, then at the red ink. Bright, like the spilled blood of their enemies.
“You did?”
“Yep. You’re...different, Sooga. You needed something that was more than them. I-woah, you okay?”
“Yes, s-sorry. You just. Touched me and...sometimes it makes me jump.”
Kohga chuckled, lightly strumming his thumb over the spot he just touched.
“Right here?”
“....yes. You’re just. You have very soft hands. Always so delicate. It’s why I...I wanted to put a ring on your finger.”
“This again.”
“I’m s-sorry! I just. I just really. Really love you. With all that I am. I wanted to show it to you. But...I think I see what you mean.”
“How so, big guy?”
Sooga paused as Kohga continued his work, cautious as ever.
“You don’t want the traditional means of matrimony. You want to be free. You want to do as you please, and you feel as though a ring in a confine. I make you feel restricted. And for that I’m...sorry.”
Kohga put the needle down, lightly blowing at the ink. He looked down at his work, and even though his ass hurt from sitting down for so long, he was in fact, VERY proud of himself. Long sleeve of red, detailed, careful designs and patterns. Something that meant something to them.
“You know what those last two slashes are?”
“I...no.”
“It means instead of just one strike, you have two. Two weapons, instead of one. It means...you have me. Ring be dammed.”
“Does this mean i...understand you properly?”
Kohga looked up at him, before grabbing his face, and pressing his lips against his. It was an out of the blue kiss, one rough and full of affection Kohga had for him. It lasted only a second, and Sooga missed it right when Kohga pulled away.
“Yeah. You did. I need YOU. I need our lives. I need to exist with you. I don’t need this other crap. I need...what I show you, right here.”
Kohga’s soft fingers slid over his work, and it almost made Sooga shuddered. There was something so tender, so sweet and loving about the touch. Even the way his skin felt raw and sore, it made his heart thud in his chest. Sooga caught Kohga’s hand in his own before it could pull away.
“What if I sold the damn thing, and we went on a vacation? A long one.”
“I’m listening.”
“To some far off land? I’ll pack, I’ll even carry you over every mountain and hill.”
“Hmmmm...not QUITE convinced.”
“I’ll make every beauty of the world feel hideous in your presence.”
“Now THAT’S what I’m talking about. Let’s do it. After THIS has healed, of course.”
“This might heal. But my heart will never, not so long as your gaze stabs it so.”
“This...is gonna be a long vacation. I can’t wait.”
Kohga chuckled, holding onto his shoulders and kissing him again. Just one more time.
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Okay you mentioned Kohga having the hots for king Rhoam. I'm sorry, but can we see something with that???
I make ONE fucking joke, and Ya'll take it to the next level. Fuck you, let's get this over with.
"Kingie! Long time no see big guy!"
Kohga was planning on just hanging out at the hideout today, when he was given a summon by the king. Not that Kohga minded a trip to the castle, he was always fed pretty well. He dove in for a high five with the king, but from the way he glared, he could tell he was NOT in the mood. Even the blade master he brought with him had to cringe at the rejection. Sooga joined him too, but seemed unfazed by the rather cold attitude.
"I'm glad you came at such short notice. I have something very important to discuss with you."
"Oh is it about the fact that we're buying up all the bananas? Look, we still gotta do SOMETHING evil to-"
"It's NOT."
His voice was steely, firm. Someone was NOT happy. His glare was so menacing, his boys took a step forward, as if the king was about to try to beat his ass. Kohga patted their shoulders, making them ease up a bit.
"Easy boys, easy. Look, you two wait out here, imma have a chat with Kingy here."
Sooga of course held protests, but Kohga held his hand up, silencing him.
"Trust me. You two hunks can dash in and protect me at any time. Not that I need it. Though I DO like the attention."
His men bowed, keeping their place. Kohga followed King Rhoam, right to his secret study, in the library, beyond the metal book case. He hated royals, but he had to hand it to Rhoam, there were so many sneaky spaces to hide and explore (and coming from the chief of the Yiga clan, that was high praise). Rhoam shut it behind them both, and Kohga took a look around. This was way different from the main rooms in the castle. Much more personal, snuggly even. A few crates of supplies, a desk full of scattered books, a few chairs, and even a few weapons hung on the wall besides them.
"Nice spot. How many people know about this little place?"
"The ones who built it, and my daughter."
"Well, aren’t I special?"
Kohga chuckled, pulling up a seat and helping himself to the surprisingly comfy chair. He might steal this, honestly. King Rhoam took a seat in front of him, clearing his throat.
"I suppose you're wondering why I summoned you?"
"If it's not about the bananas, then no not at all."
Kohga was already kinda bored, and he started to hum, playing with his hands. He found it easier than just sitting there and looking someone in the face.
"It's about my daughter, Zelda. She complained about you."
Kohga stopped, finally looking at his face. He was about to ask if he was serious, and apparently he was.
"Whaaaat? ME? What did I do?"
He sighed, before folding his arms across his chest.
"She is growing tired of your men. Apparently you give them permission to try to court her."
Kohga wanted to argue with that, but then he thought about it. He was kinda at fault, getting whatever clan member interested to hit on her. Flowers, treats, poetry, even just getting a few smooth talkers to try their hands at getting her attention. He just shipped Mipha and Link so hard, he decided to boot out the competition. Not that he hated her, of course not. Kohga shrugged.
"How is that a problem? I'm throwing HUNKS at her! No clue how that makes ME the bad guy! It’s because they’re Yiga, isn’t it?”
“It’s because she’s already in love with her knight. I’m already planning on giving him my blessings, should they finally decide to wed.”
Kohga should’ve expected it honestly, this old fashioned kinda ranting. Sure they were both kinda up there in age, but they were NOT alike. Kohga shook his head, standing up from his seat.
“Look, I don’t have kids, so I dunno what it does to ya, but you’re taking things WAY outta proportion here. You’re already ready for your daughter, seventeen, to get married.”
King didn’t seem to get it, as if this was a totally normal thing.
“Well yes. Royals marry around this age, why dawdle?”
Kohga put his hand on Rhoam’s shoulder, who didn’t seem to love it, but didn’t exactly push Kohga off.
“Look, let the girl have a little FUN before she gets hitched! She’s got the rest of her life for that stuff, if anything I’m just giving her choices.”
“I’m...not following.”
“For the love of- look. If she wants me to back off, I’ll tell my guys to heel. But I don’t really think she’d complain about me. She only really clams up about you. So it’s why I’m thinking SHE’S not complaining. YOU are.”
He knew by the look in his face that he was right. Kohga chuckled, hands on his hips.
“You don’t gotta lie like that! Makin’ me think I was a bad guy here! If YOU have problems, say you do. Doesn’t mean I’ll listen, but at least you wouldn't be a liar.”
His brows furrowed, but Kohga found it hard to take him seriously at this point.
“I am saying this for the sake of my daughter. If she is to remain pure-”
“Oh great, purity culture bullshit. Look, Kingy, don’t blame her for the fact that you haven’t gotten any lately.”
He put his hand over his chest, as if he had something just terribly hurtful.
“I beg your pardon?!”
“You heard me! You know If I didn’t know any better, you’re just mad because everyone’s gettin’ some lovin’ but you.”
Kohga leaned against the King’s chair. This was some juicy shit, you bet your bananas he was gonna milk it for all it was worth.
“When WAS the last time you got off? Few months?”
King Rhoam looked at him as if he had gone insane, before pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Almost nineteen years, roughly.”
“Holy-you haven’t nutted since your kid was born? Fucks sake, I’d be grumpy as hell too, no wonder.”
He wasn’t even expecting him to answer, honestly. King Rhoam scoffed, as if regretting giving him a response.
“We’re derailing the topic at hand-”
“Now now, I’m not done yet.”
Kohga moved in front of him, one hand at the chair, and pinning Rhoam between the seat, and Kohga’s face.
“Look, I get it. You wanna take care of what you have, you’re constantly stressed, I can only imagine how bad you have it. And knowing I was the cause of some of that stress? Selfish of me really. Let me make it up to you there, Kingy.”
Rhoam looked perplexed at his choice of words, like he figured he would be. Kohga always did have the hots for the clueless ones.
“I’m saying, let me end your streak.”
Still nothing. Holy hell, he forgot he loved idiots. He sighed, pointing down to the king’s crotch.
“Let me polish the royal scepter. Take a gander at the royal jewels. I’m essentially saying let me get you off.”
THAT seemed to get a rise out of the king, given the way he damn near jumped out of his chair.
“That is NOT why I summoned you here! In the SLIGHTEST! The AUDACITY!”
Kohga let go off the chair, putting his hands on his hips.
“One, you have the audacity to NOT immediately say yes, I’m a goddamn treat. Two, why the hell not? You ever fuck anyone that WASN’T the Queen?”
No response. So that was a no. Oh this was going to be some fucking fun. Kohga put his hands on his knees, leaning in so his mask was so close to touching his face.
“Tell you what, because I like newbies. You let me do my thing. And if you don’t like it, you just say the word. In exchange, I’ll tell my guys to heel. Eh? Cool offer?”
King Rhoam didn’t immediately say no, like he expected him to. He seemed stunned at first, but hey, you miss every shot you don’t take. He was going to get a no any-
“Alright. Fine. So long as this does NOT leave this study.”
Holy SHIT. This guy did NOT just say yes. Kohga fumbled a bit, clearly not knowing how to react. He wasn’t bluffing in the slightest, he just had no clue that the king would ACTUALLY take him up on that. He chuckled, poking Rhoam on his nose.
“Well look at you! Growin’ outta that royal shell, color me surprised! Alright, stays between us. Now, you just sit right there, and let ol’ Kohga do his thing.”
He made the king tilt his head up a bit, so he couldn’t see him. Not letting him see what he was doing would make him freak out a lot less, and he could be in denial about the fact that a dude was gonna suck him off. Kohga pushed aside his mask, just enough to reveal his lips, before he got down on his knees. He parted the King’s legs, taking but a moment to massage them. Lot’s of clothes made the guy look almost fat, but Kohga knew better. Those were some toned muscles under that, just how Kohga imagined. He kept massaging for a moment longer, getting him used to being touched, before he un did his belt, and pulling him free of his cloth confines. And holy. Shit. King Rhoam was a dilf dream down here. He wasn’t absolutely massive, but he certainly wasn’t a pipsqueak. He was long, thick, with plenty of white pubic hair. Kohga softly stroked the length of it, and watched as Rhoam seemed to freeze upon the contact.
“Right right, been a while. I’ll go slow, I’ll go slow. Easy does it.”
He had a rather lovely curve downward, and Kohga could only picture how well it’d go down his throat. He kept his motions nice and slow, till he noticed the King’s grip on the armrests loosen. Then he started to up the ante, just a little bit. With his other hand, he cupped his balls, lightly rubbing them in his palm. Then he heard him groan. It was faint, but Kohga caught it. That was the sound of a man who hadn’t been touched in a long, long time. Even by himself, apparently. He was already getting stiff in his hand.
“You’ve...done this before.”
“Not with a royal at least. But yeah, Kohga’s seen a few bananas in his day.”
Rhoam clearly had some kind of retort, before he seemed to jump upon feeling Kohga kiss the head. Kohga tried not to snicker, finding his sensitivity just hilarious. His age seemed to not affect his need for attention. Especially given that a few kisses around the base was enough to get him nice and hard in his hand. He made his touch a bit firmer on his balls, and his stroking a bit quicker on his length. And Rhoam was LOVING it. His head was tossed back, his breathing got all nice and fast, and he could see, past that beard, him biting his bottom lip.
“There we go, all nice and comfy. Any chance you want me to stop here?”
Rhoam was so out of it, he couldn’t do anything but shake his head. Kohga chuckled. He was gonna love this. Feeling him start to throb in his hand, he decided to really wow ol’ Kingy here. He pulled his hand away, using it to palm at himself, before he put the head right in his mouth. Rhoam’s breath hitched, and Kohga loved that. Love how he was making a royal so weak. He pushed himself to make more, stopping shy of halfway down his length. It was enough to make Rhoam squirm in his seat, and even put his hand right on top of Kohga’s head. How cute. Kohga groaned as he pushed his head back and forth, really getting a feel for that thick cock. Then he pulled away, nice and slowly, drool still connecting them.
"Why did you-"
"You were about to cum. I could tell. I want this to be REALLY good for you, so you're going to wait."
"I DEMAND you-"
He was halted when Kohga took a hold of his balls. Nothing too hard, just enough to get him to shut up.
"No no no. You don't get that attitude with me. You rule Hyrule, I rule your cock. I decide when you cum. And because you wanna act up, you get a punishment. Look at me."
Rhoam looked, despite not wanting to, at all. Kohga kept massaging him, tediously and slowly.
"You wanna cum? You wanna shoot your load down my pretty throat? You gotta ask for it like a grown up. No tantrums. Go on. Ask."
Rhoam clearly didn't want to, but Kohga’s lips (and throat) was a blessing, not a right. So he sighed, and made himself obey.
"I...would like to orgasm-"
"Try again. Cum. Make me WANT it."
Rhoam swallowed, before trying again.
"I would...like to cum. In your mouth."
"There we go, much better. Knew you could be a polite boy."
He took a minute to suckle at his balls, really coating them in drool, before taking Rhoam fully in his mouth. That's right, every bit of that royal cock found it's way into his mouth, and Kohga gagged. It was intentional, and it made Rhoam moan desperately. So close. Kohga wasted no more time, and acted like the perfect dick sucker he knew he was.
Kohga was relentless. He groaned loudly as he bobbed his head back and forth, practically fucking his own mouth from the force. Rhoam was really getting into it now, cursing and panting under his breath, especially when Kohga pulled away to aggressively suck at his tip. Kohga was absolutely, and positively cock hungry, and he wasn’t afraid at all to show it. Kohga slurped, and gagged, slurped and gagged, grumbling as if he was an animal, greedy for the chance of tasting cum. Then he got it.
King Rhoam came, and Kohga gulped it down, only pulling away to smear it against his throbbing length. It was a big load, just how he thought it'd be. Ribbons and ribbons of cum littered their clothes, the floor, and the insides of his stomach. He pulled away once he knew no more would be cumming, feeling no more reason to. King Rhoam was a SIGHT to behold. A shaking, panting, cum covered mess. Kohga chuckled, taking a quick second to clean up. A good cock sucker could clean himself up in a flash, as if nothing ever happened. He stood back up, pulling King Rhoam’s face by his beard, and he kissed him. Not because he liked him, nor did he think he was cute. It was because there was something humiliating about making the King himself, taste his own load. He pulled away, wiping his lips, and putting his mask right back down. He could see that little bit of cum on his lips, and it was so goddamn funny to him.
“Glad we had this little chit chat, Kingy wingy. You ever need to get a load of your chest, you know who to send for. Though, I don’t do anything for free. Can I take the chair?”
Rhoam just sat there, looking bewildered, before he gently nodded. Kohga clapped his hands a bit, grabbing the chair, and giving Rhoam a little bit of a wave. He managed to meet up with Sooga and the Blade master, who didn’t even get to say hello before he made them carry the chair he was holding. Sooga looked at it curiously, turning to Kohga.
“Are we stealing this?”
“Nope! Said I could have it! It’s a real nice chair.”
“Why would he give it to you?”
“We had a nice long chat. Wasn’t something I saw...comin’”
Kohga grinned behind his mask. He was an absolute STUD, no doubts about that.
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Shadows of the Yiga | Chapter 8
Talon wasn’t around when Link and Aryll got to the ranch, but they made their way into the paddocks, anyway, each retrieving their favorite horse and bringing them into the barn. The old, battered farm truck pulled up in front of the barn as they brushed and saddled the horses. Talon stepped out, grunting and muttering under his breath as his stiff joints cracked. He stretched his arms over his head, then mosied toward them with his rifle in hand. He spat at the ground before entering the barn, acknowledging Link with a nod and tipping his straw hat to Aryll.
“It’s yer day off, Kid,” he said in a gruff voice. “Fact, shouldn’t she be in school?”
“We’re playing hooky,” Aryll said with a wide grin.
“You know,” Link started, “you’re not supposed to announce it to everyone you talk to.”
Aryll rolled her eyes. “It’s not like I’m telling my teachers.”
Talon smiled and nodded. “Right, then. So, yer cleaning dem stalls afta, hm?”
“Link said I could do it,” Aryll said, still grinning over her horse’s back.
“I dun care who does it,” he said. He thrust the rifle into Link’s arms. “Dem bears ‘ave been out ‘n about, yanno. Shoot ‘em ‘fore they get at my cuccos ‘gain.”
Link shrugged and secured the rifle onto the saddle. It wasn’t the first time he had to shoot a bear or two that had wandered onto the property. Link would have allowed them to take a cucco or two, mainly out of revenge, but it would have only made them come back more frequently, and then he’d never hear the end of it from Talon.
“You trust this idiot with a gun?” Aryll said, frowning.
“If ‘e can defeat the great Ganondorf with a sword, I think ‘e can handle a rifle.”
“He can’t shoot himself in the foot with a sword,” Aryll pointed out.
Talon grinned. “Would you ratha I give ‘im a sword, den?”
Aryll seemed to consider her options for a moment.
Talon slapped Link on the back with a wrinkled hand and tipped his hat at them once more. “‘Ave fun, now.” He shot an invisible rifle. “Shoot ‘em dead.”
“Poor bears,” Aryll said as Talon mosied back into his truck. “All they want is dinner.”
“They’ll eat you for dinner,” Link said.
“Beats peanut butter and banana sandwiches,” she said with a shrug.
They brought their horses out of the barn where they both climbed into their saddles. Aryll took a moment to coo to her horse, reaching down to scratch the gelding’s ears as Link and his steed started onward. Her gelding trotted to catch up to his companion, slowing to a walk as he reached his side. His ears and tail flicked happily as they walked.
They followed the path around the open pastures, along the tree line, and eventually into the woods, where they continued to follow various trails as they twisted this way and that. When the path widened and flattened, they broke into a gallop, racing one another. Most of the time, Link let Aryll slip passed him.
She stood in her stirrups, thrusting a fist in the air and whooping loudly in an attempt to rub her victory in Link’s face.
Before long, the trees thinned, and they eventually stepped out of the forest and into a clearing. Rolling hills stretched out into the countryside of Hyrule and to the horizon. To their right, the land sloped downwards toward a dirt road. Beyond the road lay a thick forest, and the mountain range seemed to spring up from the trees. To their left, the land stretched on until it met the edge of Lake Hylia. The lake was far too wide to see beyond it, but somewhere, the highway stretched over the lake, busy with passing motorists oblivious to the landscape that Aryll and Link enjoyed.
It was like a secret only she and her brother knew about, and it quickly became Aryll’s favorite place to escape to. They often rode out to it, letting their horses stretch their legs, galloping along the ridge of the hills, without a care in the world. It didn’t matter who won or lost; it wasn’t a race, but an escape from their own realities.
This time, however, they did not run away from their lives. Instead, they looked out over the landscape as the horses grazed quietly. A gentle breeze blew through their manes and tails and Aryll sighed. It felt like the first time in a long time where she felt relatively at peace. Despite all that had transpired, she and Link had both come out on top, and she was reminded that over the years, they always did. No matter what life threw at them, they always prevailed, and she felt comfort in that. Link would never let it be otherwise. And neither would she.
She turned to her brother, who was no longer enjoying the peace that came with the view, but instead had his nose in his phone, his fingers flying along the screen as he texted. Aryll took out her own phone, flipping through the filters on her camera until she settled on one with dog ears and a tongue. She held it out at arm’s length until Link was in the picture. He glanced up with an annoyed look on his face, and she snapped the picture.
“Mipha says hi,” Link said dryly as he turned back to his phone.
Aryll glanced at him. “You’re texting her?”
“She called Saturday asking about you.”
She pinched her lips together. “Whatcha talkin’ about now?”
“How many kids we’re gonna have.”
Aryll frowned. “I know you’re being a jerk, but I’d be okay with that.” She watched as he snorted and otherwise ignored her comment, recalling the end of the conversation she overheard in the hospital. Link and Kit were talking about some kind of Yiga Clan. She hadn’t thought anything of it then, or the days that followed, but the more she recalled the moment, the more intrigued she became. It seemed a serious topic, or, at least at one point, but Link had blown it off completely.
“So,” she started, keeping her gaze on Link, hoping to catch a reaction from him when she continued. “What’s the Yiga Clan?”
Link’s fingers paused, but his gaze did not move off the screen. He continued the message after a moment, then slipped the phone back in his pocket. He turned his gaze to the horizon. “The Yiga Clan?”
“Yeah,” Aryll said carefully. “I heard you and Kit talking about it in the hospital.”
His brows furrowed. “You mean his crazy conspiracy theories?”
“I thought the Yiga Clan was real,” she said. “Dad mentioned them once or twice, didn’t he?”
“Yeah, the cult of losers, sure.”
Aryll hesitated. “You said they were rogue Sheikah.”
Link’s gaze met hers. He was angry and suspicious with her. After a moment, he turned away. “They’re nothing to worry about.”
“I don’t know,” Aryll said slowly. “Rogue Sheikah sound like a big problem. What do they want? To bring Ganondorf back or something?”
Link hesitated. “There’s nothing they can do to bring him back,” he said. “Not without breaking Zelda’s seal. And there’s no way to do that without…”
“Without?” Aryll pressed.
“Without the Master Sword,” he said simply. It was the truth, anyway. But he was sure that if it came down to it, they could do whatever they wanted if they had another piece of the Triforce to aid them.
“Oh.” Aryll turned her gaze away. She sensed her brother was hiding something more, but she didn’t press further. “Well, that’s good, then. I don’t want you to be a hero anymore.”
“It’s not exactly a job I can quit,” Link muttered.
“Well, if there’s no danger, then there’s no need for a hero, right?”
Link shrugged. “Sure.”
“You have no sword anymore, anyway,” she continued. “You’d be useless.”
“I don’t need a sword to be useful,” Link said.
Aryll glanced at the rifle on his saddle and bit her lip. “I guess,” she said. “Either way, you don’t stand a chance against a rogue Sheikah.”
“Nope,” he said with a sigh.
Aryll frowned. “Are you sure? That they’re not… a problem?”
Link glanced at her. “Don’t you think if we were in danger, I would have done something about it by now?”
“I guess.”
“Don’t listen to Kit’s shit,” Link said. “The war’s been over for ten years. Everything’s fine.”
Aryll nodded. Of course she was being ridiculous. She got herself nervous over nothing. If the world was in trouble, Link would know about it. And he would fix it.
It was just after noon when they returned to the barn. Once the horses were untacked and back grazing in their paddocks, Link and Aryll turned to the task of mucking stalls and otherwise cleaning the barn for Talon. Talon moseyed into the barn a couple hours later as they were finishing up, and he had his hands on his hips as he inspected the barn with a nod.
“Guess I gotta pay ya for the day,” he said gruffly. “Even though ya came in on yer day off.”
“Nah,” Aryll said with a grin. “I did all the work today.”
“So, I gotta pay you?”
Aryll put a hand on the old man’s shoulder and winked. “This one’s on me since I took your horse out.”
“Ah, he could use a lil’ work,” Talon said. “He’s been gettin’ fat out there on that grass all day.”
“Any time,” Aryll said as she dusted her hands together. “I can drive now. Link said I could take his car whenever I want.”
“The actual phrase was ‘over my dead body,’” he reminded her with a sly glare.
“We’re still working on it,” Aryll said with a nudge to Talon. “Someday.”
“Guess I’ll see ya this weekend?” Talon said, tipping his hat to them. “Don’t work too hard there, Kid.”
Aryll let her brother drive on the way home, and Link opted to stop to treat them both to ice cream sundaes before making it home for the evening. Both of their sundaes were much larger than necessary, which made up for the fact that they hadn’t eaten lunch, and it seemed reasonable enough to label it as their dinner, too, as neither of them would feel hungry for the rest of the night.
When they got home, Aryll plopped herself down on the couch, letting her legs hang over one end as she lay against the couch on one side. While Link busied himself with the mail, Aryll flipped through the channels on the tv. After finding nothing of interest, she let it stay on a channel that had soap opera reruns playing and instead occupied herself with her phone.
Still, nothing on it caught her interest, and when Link finally sat beside her with a sigh, she took his phone and decided to flip through his apps.
“There’s nothing weird on here, right?” she asked carefully. She opened his social media apps, and finding nothing of interest, chose to send suggestive emojis to Revali insead. She then moved on to searching the internet, particularly searching for an obscene image to plaster on Link’s background. After saving to his phone a variety of images, from fat, naked men, to pink unicorns, She opened the gallery to select one to make as his new background. She scrolled through the albums in search for the images she downloaded, but a few particular albums caught her attention instead.
One album in particular seemed to have images from years ago. Some of them included Link and Mipha together, while others ranged from Link and Riju posing with laser guns and Revali flipping the camera both middle fingers. Among these were even a young Aryll, and a few of her and her father together. It seemed even then, she felt the need to steal her brother’s phone and put ridiculous pictures on it.
A particular video caught her attention, and she opened the file to play it. A six year old Aryll held the phone out in front of her, making faces at herself and giggling. It shifted and moved violently as she skipped about the room. Her face returned, and her tongue stuck out at the corner of her mouth as she concentrated. The image on the screen flipped to her father leaning against the counter. He looked up from his phone and grinned.
“Stop playing with my phone,” came Link’s voice from somewhere off screen. The camera turned to her older brother, standing in the doorway, his brows kit together in annoyance. Aryll giggled from behind the camera and the video jolted again as she hurried out of her brother’s grasp.
“Argh!” came Link’s voice once more. “What the hell? Stop it!”
The video spun around, revealing Link’s head in his father’s arms as Rusl proceeded to dig his knuckles into his son’s skull. Link squirmed in a desperate attempt to get out of his father’s grasp.
“You’re an immature weasel!” Link shouted.
“No evidence!” Rusl shouted, throwing his hand out in a playful attempt to block the camera. Link took advantage of his dropped stance and freed himself. He rubbed his head with his hand and frowned as Aryll giggled.
“I think he lost some brain cells,” Aryll’s voice said.
Rusl grinned. “How can he possibly lose any more? There’s nothing in there!”
The camera dropped and Aryll giggled as her father scooped her up, and the video ended. Aryll held her gaze on it for a moment with a smile, then closed the gallery, completely forgetting her mission to plaster ridiculous images all over her brother’s phone. She let it drop to the couch and sat up, pulling her knees to her chest.
“I’m glad you let me steal your phone all the time,” she said. “And you kept everything.”
Link had been watching her at the corner of his eyes. He turned his gaze back on the tv. “That’s not true,” Link said. “I deleted all the poop emoji pictures you downloaded.”
Aryll grinned. “I forgot I was obsessed with those.”
“You were a weird child,” Link said. “It was mildly concerning.”
Aryll threw a pillow at him. “That’s because I grew up in a weird family.”
“For the record, I was completely normal.”
“Yes, because having the spirit of a hero and a magic triangle on your hand is totally normal.” She rolled her eyes.
“And I still managed to barely skate by in high school,” he reminded her. “Totally normal.”
“Totally lazy.”
“I saved the world. How does that make me lazy?”
“Is that on your resume?”
“Right between barely passed high school and college dropout,” Link said dryly.
“Employers must have been throwing themselves at you.” She sighed and got to her feet. “Speaking of passing high school. I do have finals next week I need to study for.” She offered him a crooked smile. “Thanks for today.”
“Sure.” Link watched his sister leave the room. When she was gone, he trudged into the kitchen, pulling a beer from the fridge. He popped the top, tossed the bottle cap on the counter, and dropped back onto the couch to zone out in front of the tv.
*****
Kohga stood on the cliff just outside of the hidden base, overlooking the vast, empty desert. He had heard Dorian’s approach, but offered the Yiga soldier no greeting. Dorian stood a few yards away from the Yiga leader in silence, making no effort to move any closer, waiting for him to speak. And he did.
“The ward remains over the city,” Kohga said. “All these years it has held strong. But I’m not surprised. Even in her aging years, Impa has remarkable abilities.” He glanced over his shoulder at Dorian. “I would have preferred it if you had killed her when I asked, but I can’t say I didn’t understand your resilience. You’ve gathered a lot of intel from within the city walls. And it seems you were right, afterall. My patience has paid off.” He turned to look back out over the desert. “I knew it would be next to impossible to get my hands on Zelda, but it seems Link has finally come out from the shadows, just as I hoped he would. The ward is strongest inside the city. Every time he leaves those boundaries, it grew weaker around him. My men have found him at last. We can finally get our hands on the great Chosen Hero and his little piece of the Triforce.”
“Zelda will look for him,” Dorian confirmed with certainty. “I cannot promise she will be alone, however.”
“I am not concerned about those Champions,” Kohga said, blowing him off with a wave of his hand. He looked over his shoulder at Dorian once more and grinned. “Are you?”
“Of course not.”
“Good,” Kohga said with a nod. “I know you will be able to finish them just as you did Rusl. They will hardly be a hindrance in our plan. It’s only a matter of time before we have the Triforce in our possession. I am confident we will be able to use it to its full potential and revive Ganondorf once more. And I will have much pleasure in turning Hyrule’s Heroes against them.” He turned to face Dorian completely. “You have done well, Dorian. Keep up your appearances with Impa and Roham. Should anything more of note transpire, do be sure to let me know, hm?”
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Shadows of Hyrule | Chapter 77
Just as Link expected, the media had gathered around the hospital, anxiously waiting for Hyrule’s Champions to make their appearance. But to his relief, they were also greeted with heavy security detail, and despite Revali’s eagerness to brag to the cameras, they made it through the crowd without incident and into the awaiting town cars.
All Link wanted to do was go home and sleep in his bed for the rest of the summer. But even though the war was over, there were still some loose ends that needed tying up. For one, the sword needed to be returned to where he found it, which would - hopefully - close the last portal, sealing Ganondorf away once and for all.
Secondly, there was the matter of Revali’s mysterious remark to him and Zelda. Something still weighed heavily on the minds of the Champions. Something that Link and Zelda were completely unaware of. Link hadn’t the slightest idea what had happened while they were seperated, but the thought festered in his mind and made him sick to his stomach. He wanted nothing more than to put the entire thing behind him.
And as he thought about it, another realization came to mind. There was still the unanswered question about the Yiga Clan. Zelda had her suspicions that there was a mole among the Sheikah entrusted with the safety of the royal family. She had mentioned that Impa had warned her not to look into the Yiga Clan. Surely she wouldn’t have made such a warning if there was nothing to hide.
He hoped, at the very least, the hardest part was over.
The Champions found themselves in each other’s company once more. They were gathered together at the park. The same park they so frequently visited. The park where their last soccer game was suddenly interrupted by Ganondorf’s return. On this cool, summer evening, however, the park was empty as they huddled together, keeping their voices low as they spoke.
“So,” Link started, shoving his hands in his pockets. “What’s the deal?”
The four Champions exchanged wary glances for a moment before Revali spoke.
“We think the Yiga Clan is still in business, and we think there’s a mole in the Sheikah. Someone is working with them.”
“Right,” Zelda started, slightly hesitant. “I know.”
Urbosa narrowed her gaze on Zelda. “What do you mean you know?” she hissed.
“I mean. Well. I… had my own suspicions,” she admitted.
“Since when?” Daruk asked.
“For a while,” she said.
“And you didn’t think to tell us?” Revali said.
Zelda narrowed her gaze on him. “It was just a suspicion.” she said. “It’s not like there was anything I could do about it unless it amounted to something. I have no proof.”
“Well,” Revali started, crossing his arms and turning his attention to Link. “If it’s proof you need, your father’s got it.”
Link’s brows furrowed. “What the hell are you talking about?”
“It seems he and Dorian are out to kill each other,” Daruk said. “It’s a wonder they haven’t offed the other yet.”
Link shook his head. “They’re best friends.”
“So, threatening each other with loaded weapons is your idea of friendship?” Urbosa said.
“I wish I had known that,” Revali said with a grin.
“What are you talking about?” Link sneered.
“Look,” Daruk started seriously. “After you got gutted for a second damn time, we thought we were fucked. Zelda was holding that dickwad back with everything she had, and we needed to get her out of there and come up with a damn plan.” He hesitated. “We went to the base outside the city, but your dad had other plans. I thought he and Dorian were going to kill us all right then and there.”
“He said he should have killed Dorian when he had the chance,” Revali said simply.
“And he was the reason everything happened,” Urbosa said.
“Everything?” Zelda echoed. “Like…”
“Like opening the portals and giving Ganondorf every advantage he could, probably,” Daruk said.
“Exactly what a Yiga bastard would do,” Revali confirmed.
“No,” Zelda said quickly. “Dorian… he’s not with the Yiga. He’s Impa’s second in command. She trusts him.” She grew angry. “And don’t you dare tell me she’s one of them, too!”
“Probably not,” Urbosa said. “But it’s likely she doesn’t have a clue.”
“Or she does,” Daruk pointed out, “and she’s just not telling us.”
“And she won’t say anything,” Urbosa said.
“No, she won’t,” Zelda said slowly. “She knew I was looking into the Yiga Clan. She pulled me aside and told me to stay out of it.”
“That’s enough for me,” Daruk said. “Sounds like the Yiga Clan is still a very real threat. And if Dorian is a mole, that’s even more bad news for us.”
“What do you think they’ll do?” Mipha asked.
“I’m sure they’ll do everything in their power to bring Ganondorf back and fuck up everything we’ve done to get rid of his sorry ass,” Revali said.
“How could they do that?” Mipha’s brows furrowed together.
“I’m sure they have their ways,” Urbosa said. “And we shouldn’t wait to find out. I’m not doing a second war with that giant dick.”
“What do you want me to do about it?” Link muttered.
“Oh, I don’t know,” Revali said, rolling his eyes. “Get your dad to talk.”
“He won’t,” Link said. “He won’t tell me shit.”
“How can you be so sure about that?” Zelda said. “After everything we’ve been through already -”
“Because he’s been hiding shit from me since the beginning,” Link snapped. He hesitated and kicked the toe of his shoe into the dirt. “And he probably has every reason to. If I needed to know, he would have told me.”
“I’d say if it has to do with the safety of Hyrule, you should know,” Urbosa said. “You are the Chosen Hero, after all.”
“Yeah,” Link grunted. “Let me know what that means anything to anyone. It doesn’t give me any special treatment.”
“So, you can’t put that on your resume?” Revali said.
Link sighed. “Are we done? I have a sword to get rid of a portal to close.”
“I’ll see what I can find,” Zelda said. “About Dorian and the Yiga.”
Urbosa pinched her lips together. “Be careful. Don’t do anything without us.”
“I’m the princess of Hyrule,” she said. “What is he gonna do? Kidnap me in my own home?”
“I’m not coming to anyone’s rescue,” Link said, turning his back on his friends. “My job is done.”
“Don’t relax too much,” Revali warned him. “We may be kicking Yiga ass next.”
“Sure,” Link said over his shoulder. “As long as I can sleep the rest of the summer away, first.”
*****
His father was home when Link got home. He and Aryll were happily stuffing their faces with pizza when Link entered. He sat himself at the table with a heavy sigh and reached across to snag his own slice.
“Did they have pizza in the olden days?” Aryll asked with a mouthful of pizza.
“The olden days?” Rusl repeated.
“Yeah. Like. Do you think Hylia liked pizza?”
“I don’t think they had pizza, Ary,” Link said.
Aryll frowned. “Those poor people.” She shrugged and took another bite of her slice. “So, tomorrow,” she continued, changing the subject. “We’re gonna get a puppy, right?”
“I don’t think so,” Rusl said.
“But you said if we won we could get a puppy!”
“In my defense,” Rusl said. “I was fairly sure we would lose.” He grinned at Link.
“Ha. Ha,” Link said sarcastically.
“Well,” Aryll said. “We win. And I get a puppy.”
Rusl put his chin in his hand and sighed. “We’ll see.”
“When I’m a Mom, I’m gonna get all the puppies and do what I say!”
Rusl laughed sharply. “We’ll see about that.”
“Yeah huh!”
“That’s the best part of being a parent,” he said. “You get to be the biggest hypocrite you want, and your best excuse is ‘because I said so.’”
“You say that all the time, Daddy.”
His grin widened. “It’s a wonderful world, Ary. Someday you’ll appreciate it.”
Aryll turned a helpless gaze to Link, and her brother simply shrugged.
“Why do you bother, Ary?” he said. “You’re old enough to know by now.”
“I’m six!”
“When I was your age,” Rusl said, “I had to walk -”
“Uphill, both ways, in the snow,” Link said dryly.
Aryll gasped at Link. “You’re turning into him!”
“No way.” Link shook his head. “I have a better excuse than that.”
“What, saving the world?” Rusl said. “That won’t get old fast.”
“I’m milking that one forever.”
“Does that mean you and Mipha are gonna have babies?” Aryll asked.
Rusl snorted and Link choked slightly on his pizza.
“Hylia, I hope not,” Rusl said. “Do you really think he could keep a damn kid alive?”
“He could make them peanut butter and banana sandwiches!”
Rusl nodded. “Ah, yes, a key category in the food pyramid, with all the nutrients a growing child needs.”
“Don’t you have to go to bed or something?” Link said to his sister.
Aryll shook her head. “No! It’s summer! I get to stay up all night!”
“Go to bed, Ary,” Rusl said.
Aryll frowned. “Do I gotta?”
“Yes,” they said in unison.
Aryll turned her gaze to each of them, then sighed. “Alright,” she said as she slid off the chair. “But only because I’m gonna build a fort in Link’s room and play his video games.”
“Have fun,” Rusl said as Aryll skipped out of the room.
Link listened as her feet hurried up the stairs and waited for the faint sound of a closing door before he spoke.
“So,” he started, taking another slice of pizza. “What’s the deal with Dorian?”
Rusl met his son’s gaze, his brows furrowed.
“Come on,” Link said. “Don’t do this shit. Everyone told me what happened.”
Rusl still did not answer his son. He picked at his pizza for a moment.
“Is Dorian working with the Yiga Clan?” Link pressed, his gaze narrowed on his father. “Is he going to fuck up everything we’ve done to stop Ganondorf?”
Rusl met his son’s gaze once more. If there was anything he knew, Link could not have guessed what it was. His father’s expression was completely void of any emotional response. He held his gaze on his father, and when endless minutes passed of no response, he got to his feet angrily.
“Stop hiding things from me!”
Rusl smiled and returned to his pizza. “Your job is done. There’s nothing more you need to worry about.”
“There is if the Yiga Clan is going to undo everything we’ve done,” Link sneered. “I’m not doing this again.”
Rusl’s smile disappeared. He regarded his son once more. “I won’t let you do it again,” he said softly. He took a bite of his pizza. “Stop worrying. You’ve done your part. Leave the rest up to us.”
Link hesitated. “What about Dorian?”
Rusl leaned back in the chair and met his son’s gaze. “Don’t worry about it. It doesn’t concern you.”
Admittedly, Link was not happy with this answer, but he trusted his father. “I thought you were friends.”
“It’s complicated.”
“Is that what your Facebook status says?” Link grinned.
Rusl smiled and got to his feet. “Promise me you’ll drop it,” he said fiercely.
Link hesitated, then nodded. “Fine,” he said. “But I can’t promise Revali will, or anyone else.”
Rusl considered this with a shrug. “Convince them. I don’t need any more trouble than I already have.”
Link frowned. “I don’t like this.”
“I know.” Rusl sighed. He patted his son’s shoulder as he left the kitchen without another word.
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