#Got inspiration from the song “Somebody To Die For” by Hurts

[heliantart]

"Farewell, Partner"

TW : BLOOD (AND ANGST) UNDER THE CUT

❝Don't go gentle into that good night❞

[beyondthebackup]

Hatred. Lust. Obsession. Death. (BxA Playlist)

I worked on this...all day. Combed through almost 100 songs. It's my first time doing something like this, but I had to get my feelings and thoughts on this ship out somehow. Thank you to @a-for-alternative for the inspiration and feedback. I hope you enjoy.

Hatred

Afraid - The Neighbourhood

You're too mean, I don't like you

Fuck you, anyway

You make me wanna scream at the top of my lungs

It hurts but, I won't fight you

You suck, anyway

You make me want to die, right when I

When I wake up, I'm afraid

Somebody else might take my place

I Get It - CheVelle

How dare you catch me counting?

How dare you call at all?

How dare you call this suffering?

How dare you call at all?

You're right, I get it

It all makes sense, you're the perfect person

So right, so wrong

Let's all live in your imaginary life

You Don't Know Me - Son Lux

I feel you tracing my scars

But you don't know me

You don't know me at all

I see you down on your knees

But you don't own me

You don't know me at all

Rose - A Perfect Circle

So no longer will I

Lay down, play dead

Play your doe in the headlights locked down and terrified

Your deer in the headlights shot down and horrified

When push comes to pull comes to shove

Comes to step around this self-destructive dance

That never would've ended 'til I rose, I roared aloud

Here I will, I am

You Know My Name - Chris Cornell

I've seen angels fall from blinding heights

But you yourself are nothing so divine

Just next in line

Arm yourself because no-one else here will save you

The odds will betray you

And I will replace you

You can't deny the prize it may never fulfill you

It longs to kill you

Are you willing to die?

The coldest blood runs through my veins

You know my name

Dance With The Devil - Breaking Benjamin

Trembling, crawling across my skin

Feeling your cold dead eyes

Stealing the life of mine

I believe in you

I can show you that I can see right through all your empty lies

I won't last long

In this world so wrong

What If I Say Please - Late Night Alumni

Cry your premeditated tears

So tenderly, so insincere

Such feigned, calculated reasons

These warm smiles, they're freezing

So don't appeal me parading like a pantomime, I mean

It's unfeeling and I'm unwilling; let me be

What if I say please?

Girl With One Eye - Florence + The Machine

I slipped my hand under her skirt

I said don't worry, it's not gonna hurt

Oh, my reputation's kind of clouded with dirt

That's why you sleep with one eye open

But that's the price you'll pay

I said, hey, girl with one eye

Get your filthy fingers out of my pie

I said, hey, girl with one eye

I'll cut your little heart out ‘cause you made me cry

I Know Where You Sleep - Emilie Autumn

Fake, crawl, search, kill, fake, crawl, search, kill

Oh my god oh my god, I touched you?

I can never live it down, I can never live it down!

God save the queen, I loved you!?

I can never live it down, I can never live it down!

Oh, oh, I fucked you?

Welcome Home - Coheed and Cambria

But if you really loved me, you would have endured my world

Well you're just as I presumed

A whore in sheep's clothing

Fucking up all I do

Yeah and if so here we stop

Then never again will you see this in your life

Loveust

The Walk - Imogen Heap

That's where this ends

No mistakes, no misbehaving

Oh, I was doing so well

Could we just be friends?

I feel a weakness coming on

No, it's not meant to be like this

Not what I planned at all

I don't want to feel like this

So that makes it all your fault

I Caught Myself - Paramore

You got it, you got it

Some kind of magic

Hypnotic, hypnotic

You're leaving me breathless

I hate this, I hate this

You're not the one I believe in

With God as my witness

Now when I caught myself, I had to stop myself

I'm saying something that I should have never thought of you,

You're pushing and pulling me down to you

But I don't know what I want

Tear You Apart - She Wants Revenge

Either way he wanted her and this was bad

He wanted to do things to her it was making him crazy

Now a little crush turned into a like

And now he wants to grab her by the hair and tell her

I want to hold you close, skin pressed against me tight

Lie still, and close your eyes girl

So lovely, it feels so right

I want to hold you close

Soft breasts, beating heart

As I whisper in your ear I want to fucking tear you apart

I Get Off - Halestorm

I get off on you

Getting off on me

Give you what you want

But nothing is for free

It's a give and take

Kind of love we make

When the line is crossed

I get off

Gingerbread Man - Melanie Martinez

I'm the icing covering his body

I wanna hold him so close, so tightly

Baby, how do I say this politely?

Love me harder and don't be nice, please

I wanna feel your crumbs on my body

I want to break you in pieces, fight me

Baby, don't be so scared of biting

Want to eat each other into nothing

Hundred - The Fray

Its hard I must confess

But I'm banking on the rest to clear away

Cause we have spoken everything

Everything short of I love you

You right where you are

From right where I am

Somewhere between

Unsure and a hundred

Third Eye - Florence + The Machine

Cause there's a hole where your heart lies

And I see can it with my third eye

And though my touch, it magnifies

You pull away, you don't know why

'Cause your pain is a tribute

The only thing you let hold you

Wear it now like a mantle

Always there to remind you

Pagan Poetry - Bjork

On the surface simplicity

But the darkest pit in me

And it's pagan poetry

Pagan poetry

This time, I'm gonna keep it to myself

This time, I'm gonna keep me all to myself

But he makes me want to hand myself over

Mechanical Love - In This Moment

And I know you'll never understand me

No matter how hard we try

And I know I'll never understand you

And your mechanical love

I still hear you in my sleep

Your running through my veins

Your whispers, your machine

We knew it was meant to be

But never meant to last

I'm sorry, you always knew

Tender - Stuck In The Sound

Please believe that I won't

Won't give you a chance

To see me fall

Now I'm losing my head

You'll never see me

Never see me again

In love

Obsession

The Diary of Jane - Breaking Benjamin

Try to find out what makes you tick

'Cause I lie down sore and sick, do you like that? Do you like that?

There's a fine line between love and hate

And I don't mind, just let me say that I like that, I like that

Desperate, I will crawl

Waiting for so long

No love, there is no love

Die for anyone

What have I become?

Decode - Paramore

How can I decide what's right

When you're clouding up my mind?

I can't win your losing fight, all the time

Nor can I ever own what's mine

When you're always taking sides

But you won't take away my pride

No, not this time

You Know You Like It - DJ Snake & AlunaGeorge

You know you like it but it drives you insane

You know you like it but it drives you insane

You know you like it but you're scared of the shame

What you want? What you gonna do?

I'm So Sick - Flyleaf

Hear it! I'm screaming it!

You're heeding to it now

Hear it! I'm screaming it!

You tremble at this sound

You sink into my clothes

This invasion

Makes me feel

Worthless, hopeless, sick

Liar (Manic Depressive Mix by ASP) - Emilie Autumn

I want to hold you to the sun

I want to be your faithful one

I want to show you all the beauty you don't even know you hold

I'm hurting you for your own good

I'd die for you, you know I would

I'd give up all my wealth to buy you back the soul you never sold

I want to mix our blood and put it in the ground

So you can never leave

I want to win your trust, your faith, your heart

You'll never be deceived

Liar

Love Me Dead - Ludo

You're a faith-healer on T.V.

You're an office park without any trees

Corporate and cold

Gushing for gold

Leave me alone

You suck so passionately

You're a parasitic, psycho, filthy creature

Finger-bangin' my heart

You call me up drunk

Does the fun ever start?

The Horror of Our Love - Ludo

I'm a killer, cold and wrathful

Silent sleeper, I've been inside your bedroom

I've murdered half the town, left you love notes on their headstones

I'll fill the graveyards until I have you

Moonlight walking, I smell your softness

Carnivorous and lusting to track you down among the pines

I want you stuffed into my mouth

Hold you down and tear you open

Live inside you, love, I'd never hurt you

But I'll grind against your bones until our marrows mix

I will eat you slowly

Breezeblocks - Alt J

She may contain the urge to run away

But hold her down with soggy clothes and breezeblocks

Germolene, disinfect the scene, my love, my love, love, love

But please don't go, I love you so, my lovely

Please don’t go, I’ll eat you whole

I love you so, I love you so, I love you so

A Love Suicide - Yutaka Minobe

I will do you harm, I will break my arm

I'm a victim of your charms

I want to be dead

When I am, I'm in bed

I can be so mean, you can beat me

I would like to shame you

I would like to blame you

Just because of my love to you

And love itself is just as innocent as roses in May

I know nothing can drive it away

Though love itself is just as brief as a candle in the wind

And it's greedy just like sin

Run - Thien Baccarin

Run.

Death

Protect Me - Placebo

Maybe we're victims of fate, remember when we'd celebrate?

We'd drink and get high until late, and now we're all alone

Wedding bells ain't gonna chime with both of us guilty of crime

And both of us sentenced to time, and now we're all alone

Protect me from what I want, protect me from what I want

Protect me from what I want, protect me, protect me

Cage of Bones - Son Lux

Let's be anyone but you and me today

Trade this heavy cage of bones for flight

And when the sirens reach out for us

We'll be far away

Oh, what a noise we'll make

Drowning out our mistakes, we can't erase

This is the chance we take

We shout until our bones break, we can't replace

Are we now what we'll be?

Are we fixed or free?

Blue - A Perfect Circle

I didn't want to know, I just didn't want to know

Best to keep things in the shallow end

'Cause I never quite learned how to swim

I just didn't want to know

Close my eyes just to look at you

Taken by this seamless vision

I close my eyes, ignore the smoke

Call an optimist, she's turning blue

Such a lovely color for you

Call an optimist, she's turning blue

While I just sit and stare at you

Come As You Are - Yuna

Come as you are, as you were

As I want you to be

As a friend, as a friend

As an old enemy

Take your time, hurry up

Choice is yours, don't be late

Take a rest as a friend

As an old memoria, memoria

And I swear that I don't have a gun

No, I don't have a gun

Running Up That Hill - Placebo

You don't wanna hurt me

But see how deep the bullet lies

Unaware I'm tearin' you asunder

Oh, there is thunder in our hearts

Is there so much hate for the ones we love?

Oh, tell me, we both matter, don't we?

It's you and me

Won't be unhappy

And if I only could

I'd make a deal with God

And I'd get Him to swap our places

Be runnin' up that road, be runnin' up that hill, be runnin' up that building

With no problems

Lacrymosa - Evanescence

Out on your own

Cold and alone again

Can this be what you really wanted, baby?

Blame it on me

Set your guilt free

Nothing can hold you back now, love

Last Flowers - Radiohead

And if I'm gonna talk

I just wanna talk

Please don't interrupt

Just sit back and listen

'Cause I can't face the evening straight

You can offer me escape

Houses move and houses speak

If you take me there you'll get relief

It's too much, too bright, too powerful

Passive - A Perfect Circle

"Dead as dead can be"

My doctor tells me

But I just can't believe him

Ever the optimistic one

I'm sure of your ability

To become my perfect enemy

Wake up and face me

Don't play dead 'cause maybe

Someday, I will walk away and say

"You disappoint me"

Maybe you're better off this way

In The Lake - Emilie Autumn

In the lake

You will find me

Behind your house

Behind your house

And from that lake

I will remind you

Of your promises broken

Your cruel words spoken

My ocean is bluer than the heart you had to break

My sea is deeper than your lake

Vienna - The Fray

Maybe in five or ten yours and mine will meet again

Straighten this whole thing out

Maybe then honesty need not be feared as a friend or an enemy

This is the distance

And this is my game face

There's really no way to reach me

There's really no way to reach me

Is there really no way to reach me?

Am I already gone?

[esters-notepad]

One thing I like about using Johnny Cash songs for inspiration: it gives me an excuse to dig deep into very American cliches. Like this story. Communist infiltrations? Secret military bases? Brainwashed soldiers, thinking themselves patriotic, but only awaiting the right key word to start furthering the Red agenda? Yes, it's really cheesy. But it was fun to write!

Day nine @chrumblr-whumblr: mind control

Johnny Cash song: 25 minutes to go

Warning. 25 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

What? What did I...? Did I do that?

Warning. 24 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

My hands... they still look like my hands. Why did I turn the key for the self-destruct?

Warning. 23 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

Edwards is shaking my shoulder: "What the hell, Harvey? What was that?" I just shake my head, but my brain doesn't clear. "Come on, Harvey, turn it off!" Edwards shouts. Of course. Turn it off. How simple. Why didn't I think of that? Turn it off. Turn the key back. Why aren't my hands moving?

Warning. 22 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

Edwards swears loudly and pushes me away. Then, suddenly, a loud bang. Edwards lies on the floor in a growing puddle of blood. Carter has drawn his pistol. Carter shot Edwards? Why?

Warning. 21 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

Nothing makes sense any more. The control room is so empty. Where is everyone? Where is Captain Miller? Lieutenant Robertson? Where's the Colonel? Somebody come and save me! I... I don't think I can save myself. And it's definitely too late for Edwards.

Warning. 20 minutes until self-destruct. The self-destruct process can no longer be aborted. Please evacuate.

Somebody is coming down the corridor. Two technicians. Jordan and Brown. Carter shoots at them, and they shoot back. I should shoot Carter in the back, now that he's facing away from me. I should... Damn, my hands won't move again. What is wrong with me? And where is everybody? Out to lunch, or what?

Warning. 19 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

Jordan and Brown have fallen and aren't getting up. Carter holsters his pistol again and strolls towards me. "Well done, Comrade Harvey", he says. I'm not a Red! I... "Maybe I should introduce myself," Carter continues. " Major Mikhail Ivanovich Kartashov, of the GRU. Thank you for your assistance. I could not have done this alone. As a token of my government's gratitude, I won't shoot you." He whips a pair of handcuffs from his pocket and chains me to a pipe by the wall. "I'll even leave you the choice whether you shoot yourself, or wait for the base to explode." That's right. My pistol is still in its holster. I should draw it. I should shoot Carter. Kartashov. I should shoot him. Why don't I?

Warning. 18 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I can't shoot him. I can't strike him. I can't even spit in his face. I curse him internally. He stands up and says: "I believe it's time to evacuate. Farewell, Comrade Harvey. You were the best candidate I ever worked with." Candidate? I've been brainwashed? That... that would explain things. That would explain a lot. Maybe everything. Carter...shov is gone. I need to get out, as well. I have to warn them that he isn't Michael Carter from Iowa, but Mikhail Kartashov from the USSR. I have to get my hand loose.

Warning. 13 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

It's hopeless. The pipe won't budge. I can't break the handcuffs. Maybe if I shoot my hand off... but no, I'd bleed out before I even got close to the evacuation shaft. I'm trapped down here. Can I pray, or did those damn Reds take that away from me, too? Dear Jesus, help! Please catch Kartashov. Please let him die when the base explodes, or let the others figure out he's an impostor, or something. Please don't let him hurt this country further.

Warning. 12 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

Please forgive me for what I've done. I didn't mean to... no, sorry. Help me take responsibility. My hands turned the key. Forgive me. Please take care of my wife after I'm gone. God, I'm cold! I don't really want to die. Please help me to meet death as a man.

Warning. 11 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I wonder when the Reds got to me. I wasn't even in Korea. Did they... do they have brainwashing facilities here? In America? God help us! I never thought they could have infiltrated us that far. It's chilling to think of.

Warning. 10 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

This base is probably not the only one. This might be the start of a bigger offensive. Maybe even the start of World War Three. Everything going according to their plan, just like it did here. And I can't do anything about it. Jesus! You have to help us. Please stop those godless Communists from taking over the world!

Warning. 9 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I have to get out of here. I have to warn them. About Kartashov. About all the rest. Somebody let me out! If I could at least reach the telephone... Maybe I could drag it closer, somehow? I have to get the word out!

Warning. 8 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I can't. There's no way. Forget about it. It's hopeless. I guess the Reds win this round.

Warning. 5 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

As if anybody could get out of here in five minutes... Alice, my dear. I'm so sorry to leave you like this.

Warning. 4 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I have to get out! Cut me loose! Damn handcuffs! Damn pipe! Damn that Kartashov!

Warning. 3 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I'll never see Alice's face again. Or the sky. Or the mountains. I'll die down here. It's really happening. I'll be dead soon.

Warning. 2 minutes until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I guess it's for the best. I did betray the whole base, after all. Even if I'd somehow gotten out, they would have condemned me to death for what I did.

Warning. 1 minute until self-destruct. Please evacuate.

I wonder if I'll see the explosion coming, like in the movies? Or if it just... ends? I wish things had been different. Jesus, forgive me. Jesus, help me. Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy

[souleaterpostanime]

SE-POST Reread part 3/4

chapter 20:Well took only 20 chapters to show Maka's mother, just probably in a way people don't like. But I thought it would be more interesting to show her as deeply flawed and hurt by the world and not as a paragon of virtue (partially because the later would maybe be even more difficult to write without resorting to killing her of for drama, which would be cheap, especially when just having a perfect person die is more boring than somebody whos flawed and who you havent fully resolved your isuess with yet...) But anyways, I think the chapter worked overall, one could complain about the convenienves of charachters meeting and going to places in oportune times but eh, I dont think that is a real problem. Also I hope I captured Spirits personality more or less, thought the concept of two awkard people talking and messing up while trying to fix it would be funny, but not sure if it landed, but atleast it mostly worked for me. Anyways, think the next chapter will let me write something more substantial about this mini arc, but we'll see.chapter 

21: Play "Cold shoulder to cry on" by Werewolf hair if you want an eno enough song for the sad parts of the chapter lol. But nah seriously, dunno, yeah maybe I shouldnt have rushed the art of this one, cause some action panels got ruinned by not being clear enough, but I think the jist of it survived. Think the idea of taking vikings, who were known to pillage and enslave people and to combine it with a overzealous social worker who can't wait to take away kids for any reason more clvever than people would admit. Especially when I kinda was "inspired" by a scandal of one of these organizations ,in Norway I think, taking away the kid of a family, just because they were another etnhicity and culture, guess old habbits die fast with nazi collaborators... But maybe I'm to harsh on them, but after hearing a few months ago that scandinavians dont even give food to their guests, it seems I was right all along, lol. Nah weird jokes aside, I guess maybe I showed Makas mood changing a bit too fast, and maybe the small.teases for charachters who will apear more in the next chapter could be kinda distracting, but I think they served the porpuse to show the time passing of Maka sleeping and waking up. Still this chapter was important to set up some developments in the future, even if it may went a bit "too real" with just parents bickering and causing kids to cry... Eh who knows If these notes seem usesless to you, just comment to ask a question, maybe I'll have something more intersting to say?chapter 

22:Yeah this one isn't one of the best... Just the fact the art kinda sucks again and maybe I also overdid it with the switching of perspectives and flashbacks, most be confusing for any reader. Still I think I thought I could use a chapter to pay off some things, and to set up them further. And also Liz having a trip from an exotic icecream flavor and anxiety is kinda funny, and I think a feat like that suits her charachter. Also making the one woman that saved Giriko kinda stupid seemed to work in a weird way. Still dunno, maybe the whole commentary on Blairs role and the choice of being human may be a bit to weird, but eh, I already commited to that, so if any "cringe reaction" community finds my stuff they will have enough material, unless I pull of what I plan to do succesfully, then I cant wait for the 10 hour long video essays exhalting my genius. (And atleast I didnt just discard a charachter I found "problematic", which would have been the easy way). Anyways eh who knows, maybe somebody reading this got something out of this, I atleast did.chapter 

23:At the first pages when rereading this one I though "man will this be more boring and tedious than I remember?" But then by the time I finished I was somehow really engadged lol, funny how a "ship" I did partly just for the hell of it developed in such a way that I like it that much, especially as someone who doesnt really care for romance storys and shit. Maybe one could say I wrote Ragnarok to be a bit too nice with Tsubaki, but with all the charachter development and stuff I guess its justifiable, makes the contrast more noticable. Still I remember thinking if Tsubakis homesickness could come off as a "first world problem", especially in a silly action story with death and monster like soul eater, but eh dunno seemed to be a idea that could work with her, especially as a bigger part of her regrett and feelings of being ignored. Maybe for it to work I had to make Blackstar to much of a dick, but some sacrifices have to be made, guess I have to give him more positive moments. But funny thing I got a comment on this chapter once which said the art was hard to read, and while I agree with that sentiment, especially in fights, I didnt really notice that this much in this chapter, especially when it was so dialog focused, and even if some panels looked goofy. But I think thats the problem of being the maker of if - you cant really tell what isnt clear to you because you now what happens better than anybody else. So whenever you dont get something stay free to comment, no mater how harsh your critique will sound. Anyways I end it with saying this: I want some cherry pepsi.chapter 

24:This one felt surprisingly short when reading, maybe because it didnt have as much dialog and discussion as the last one or maybe I was engadged in whats happening. Still I hoped I conveid the concept of Crona having a good day and succeding well, so it would make sense that his anti demon wavelength would be strong enough to temporatily purifie his blood. Also I hope there were enough hints to show he hasnt solved all his problems (think the blind man was obvious enough, maybe even a bit too much?). Still liked the villian at the start, and the misdirect who the crimson king is (and the hint that this wouldnt be a only positvie title, but one showing a split in sanity too... Dunno maybe Im trying to get too much out of the musical reference). Anyways, the action in it looked better than I remember ed, so thats a plus too. And yeah I think this is the point things finally start to heat up, but maybe Im misrembering. But next is the infamous Kim chapter so we'll see...chapter 

25:I normally dont talk a lot about the coverpages in the notes, mostly because Im not satisfied with most, they just seem rushed or just fundementally broken from the beginning, except maybe for the flow and composition of them. But in this one I even remember the first time really being proud with the cover, while it not being super simplistic. Even now, while the feeling has diminished a bit and I see in more ways how it isnt all good and looks amateurish in a few ways, I still overall am satisfied enough with it, and see it as a succesfull atempt in rendering, unlike for example the witch mass one that was just a mess. Guess it helps that I just like the whole idea of the picture, think it conveis the feeling of the chapter in a way.(just sucks that I didnt notice the typo and still am to lazy to correct it lol) Anyways, speaking of the content of it, maybe I didnt make it clear enough that Death was being kinda a dick partly because I wanted to show his "aging" when old people can get angry and irritated, not hiding their prejudices, but maybe it just went out of charachter, even if he was more like that in his youth in a way?Anyways, dont know how people see the whole Kim and Jackie dynamic, I guess I didnt have a lot to work of from the show, think they got more charachterization in the comic, which probably is more different. Still I got a backstory planned, which will show why they are childhood friends and how they didnt meet just at the academy like in the source material (I mean, maybe thats the wronf word, think the anime didnt clarify that and I base everything on that so I aint breakin' no lore lol) Still maybe this could be seen as generic drama, of a teenager being depressed and her friend showing support but eh, seemed to work, maybe it doesnt count as emotional manipulation? Also Maka getting teary eyed when mentioning how she didnt go saving Soul right away may be a bit too much, but I think in her current mental state it may be justifiable. Oh and "violence on tv" was a good joke, I dont care.chapter 

26:Hm, maybe something was missing to make Cronas mood change seem believable, but I did build it up for some time and I think exploring some childish entitlment and resentment due to trauma may be more intetestting than just the played out self loathing and crying I mean how many people do you know that instead of being happy for what they have, are pissed that they didnt get it sooner or got even more, you know what I mean, think everybody thinks in a immature way like that sometimes, especially when agitatated. But besides that, think the whole parralel between Crona and Kim worked mostly in this chapter, maybe it got a bit clunky in the perspective shifts and flashbacks but eh. Think both sides got shown as not really being "good guys" in this situation, with Kim lashing out horribly and Crona being filled with anger the whole day, which makes him snap easier. Still both are also partly justified in their actions and feelings. I dunno, maybe this ambiguity is too much for a story like that? chapter 

27:The most dramatic chapter of the story I had done to this point, probably. The fight went a bit quicker than I remember, still was intersting to incorporate such a unique weapon like Jaqueline, even if I probably didnt use it in the most creative ways. I guess one could complain that I gave Crona a bew abilitie out of nowhere with the whole pausing of the resonance and then finishing it later, but I thought with all the training from Stein and his recent confidence boost, he would be able to do something like that, specially when it fits the whole music/noise team and in the end it doesnt seem to be something to complicated just a clever/sneaky way of using soul resonance. Anyways, think Crona being "betrayed" wasnt completly justified but in a situation like that it was understandable, even if Crona could have actually even died (maybe not high risk, probably would have been found unconsious before getting heatstroke or starving but with all the commotion who knows) Anyways, yeah pushing a little kid is never ok, but just shows how messed up Crona was mentally at the moment and how strong his hatred for witches got, atleast he seemed to regret it instantly, but I wonder if for some readers that is crossing a line Anyways, at the mirror scene I made the dialog to be ambigious on porpuse so you are not sure if its Crona speaking about himself, witches or his imagination as the witches roasting him, it was supposed to flow from one to another. And the glass breaking is just a cool visual, even with my art.Anyways the shaved head might seem like a very weird decision, but with the whole trope of meaningful haircuts, I thought it would work as a fun visual meatphor and something to ease tension but also show the "transformation".

[elytrafemme]

ok firstly HI. HI HI HI <333 HI :D

REALLLLL RAEL ASF okay my faves would be like: dog years, letter to God (1974), the end, letter to God (1983), lonely is the muse, arsonist, life of a spider (draft), letter to God (1998)

I LUV READING UR THOUGHTS ON ONLY LIVING GIRL IN LA & HOMETOWN ESPEC when i have listened to the album those two have not been my faves but like... I appreciate the opening being a six minute song u are so real for this and also hometown the refrain the way she sings it is like DEVASTATING augh. Ugh. YEAH!

DOG YEARS IS CRAZY when she was dropping the insta promos i was like oh this is going to be devastating to the culture and it WAS. it's kind of unlocked things in me i fear its like soo good.

EXACTLY EXACTLY WITH THE LETTERS TO GOD EXACTLY!!!!!!!! I think 1983 was my OG fave and agree that i dont love 1998 as much but i think like... first of all crazy cool conceptually to have those but the progression going thru it like u said of I wanna be sick I don't wanna be somebody they're tryna get rid of -> I don't wanna be sick I don't wanna be somebody you're wanna get rid of -> You have to be sick I've finally found somebody I don't wanna get rid of . ACTUALLY SEVERELY FUCKED UP OF HER.

the end originally didnt hit as crazy for me and then i relistened to it when the album dropped and i was like what the FUCK man. ending the song on "my treatment starts today" and also making that the first single is genuinely like. halsey u are a fucking genius

Darwinism is such an incredible track when i was first listening to it i was like. the snippet led me in one direction and then i heard the song and was like this is a different direction and iactually love where they took this and i also love them. like musically such an incredible song

LONELY IS THE MUSE IS MY TOP SONG THIS YR IM SO SURE OF IT ive not been listening to it as much since the album dropped (ill explain in a moment) but it is one of the best songs ever written imo. so where do i go in the process when i'm just an apparatus <- this lyric is maybe my fave but even just the refrain being i always knew i was a martyr and that Jesus was one too but i was built from special pieces that i learned how to unscrew so i could always reassemble to fit perfectly for you or anybody that decides that im of use (i might have mistyped some of that srry) like THEY GET IT. THEY FUCKING GET IT!!!! When i first heard it i was like oh halsey just transcribed my life crisis rn ok cool awesome. and then its all i listened to

Shout out to arsonist when i heard a song was going to be fiona apple inspired i was SO EXCITED and like. Fuck. that song is so crazy good i love it so bad. i love the different directions they took all these songs in theyre so unique like fuckkkkk

life of the spider is quite seriously the only thing i have listened to since the album dropped. like occasionally ui'll listen to TGI or like... Two other songs. but i have been looping life of a spider nonstop. u understand me halsey understands me but like this song... again is like oh let's just transcribe mare's current thought process and life crisis and make it a beautiful incredible song and im like okay no for sure. cause i'm the spider in the kitchen weaving webs through every year and i worked real hard on the last one but the last one got me here i'm minding my own business but my presence makes you curse i should be getting better but i'm only getting worse and God how dare i even thinking of choosing here to die cause then i'm just a problem that you have to take outside <- GENUINELY THE MOST INSANE LYRICS EVER WRITTEN. BEST LYRICS EVER WRITTEN. I love this fucking song top 5 songs ever for me like. fuck them seriously for this but also. God. GOD.

NO NO NO TRUE LIKE I FEEL LIKE UGh so much artistry was put into this album they put so much care into every song!!! which is why even though there are some songs that are not as faves for me (only living girl hometown & hurt feelings i am so sorry beautiful beautiful nation) this album is truly a no skip and every single song especially those three have so much love and vision put into them. i'm literally writing a zine article abt this album and im like i have so much shit to say how do i even do this........ also i appreciate what u said about the album order bc i was originally on the fence about whether it was like Purposefully ordered but reading ur thoughts and thinking through it like. yeah! yeah. there's nothing i would change here.

and on the tiktok note genuinely like while halsey obviously does write bops and is a pop artist so they have songs on this album that are like... ego and panic attack where i can see this being like The Hits, it's also so important that this album really ISN'T made to be like a host for a bunch of radio hits. so many of these songs are not palatable for that! they're honest and brutal in a way that can't be easily like commercialized and i dont know thats really meaningful to me too

SORRY THIS IS SUCH A LONG RESPONSE but i love hearing ur thoughts on music always i am a very loyal arowrath post reader and i saw all ur stuff about TGI and im like well i need to be brave and reach out to him its very imperative for me at this time. sorry for my lengthy yap hehe i hope u are doing so well beams at u!!! <3333333

ps i havent heard any of the extra tracks or the vma performance hwich i need to because my friend told me that victoria de angelis from måneskin is bass for that performance and like i gotta be there man. i gotta

i have been deeply appreciating ur TGI posting and was wondering what ur fave songs off of it are !! - mare

HI MARE im free from academia for the day (FINALLY) so i can answer this yayayaayy

as of right now. and this is in album order And im about to list off like a good third of the album sorry in advance but: only girl living in la, dog years, letter to god 1974, letter to god 1983, darwinism, lonely is the muse, and life of the spider

first of all. only girl living in la is an INSANE way to start an album. Like i knew i was absolutely in for it seeing the track list and that we were Starting with a 6 minute long song i was like Oh she loves me specifically she knew id been tormented by songs that are 2 minutes long for too long. i dont think ive ever finished the first song on an album and been, like, scared to listen to the rest of it before (good thing)

dog years. i canteven say anything yet Like theres no words. probably one of my favorites out of my favorites

letter to god 1974 and letter to god 1983 are twins to me. (well triplets shoutout letter to god 1998 no disrespect to my girl its just the first two are my faves personally) Thank u halsey for addressing the "wanting to get really sick so people would pay attention to you" to "getting really sick and it turns out people kinda dont gaf if ur in ur 20s about it" pipeline

hometown- is anyone else trying so hard to escape their hometown or is it just me and halsey and gerard "i know im never getting out of belleville" way. also i love her voice on this one

darwinism- i was reading it as being about physical disability but apparently she said it was about neurodivergence either way is anybody else feeling ostracized from the rest of society or is it just me and halsey out here

lonely is the muse- INSANE FUCKING SONG vocally lyrically musically everything. when i found out there was gonna be a Whole Album and lonely is the muse was on it i realized i was going to die.and then i did. <3

life of the spider- i knew there was a tori amos song on the album and the one tori amos song im really familiar with is me and a gun so of course i was terrified .and i was right to be. love a song i cant listen to without having a panic attack one of my favorite genres. insanely haunting song i cant really listen to this one casually yet or possibly ever i have to like sit down and prepare. this morning i saw a spider in my bathroom and started crying. tomorrow more of the same. "favorite" not in the way where i listen to it a lot favorite in the way where i can barely listen to it at all

also one more thing i feel like in general the album is organized very well does that make sense. like the songs are in a specific order that is good and makes sense. only girl living in la -> ego -> dog years -> letter to god 1974 is an insane run of songs generally let alone first on the album but also it like. makes sense why theyre in that order. also darwinism -> lonely is the muse -> arsonist -> life of the spider i can say the same of. like yeah thats the exact order those songs should go in. this is really not a Shuffling Album to me at ALL theres a specific order they all go in and i really like that Bc half the time These Days it feels like everythings so focused on having 2 minute long songs with 15 second clips that blow up on tiktok that its always nice to have an album thats like. Ok thankgod they actually give a fuck about this and its not optimized for social media analytics

thank u for reading My essay ^___^<3 u sent this 5 hours ago when i was working on my school stuff and i waslike oh thank god i get to talk about music later. A little treat for meeee to rewind and such.And then immediately i wrote A lot of sentences but, like, for fun this time so it counts as Rewinding

[ruewrote]

ℎ𝑖𝑚, ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑚𝑒.

PAIRING: carter grant x fem!reader WARNINGS: strong language, gore GENRE: angst SONG INSPIRATION: reflections by the neighbourhood WORD COUNT: 808

navigation | ask

today was no different from the others, me with a book in hand, her sat on his lap - laid against his chest as he spoke to our friends. oh yeah i’m kind of in love with my bestfriend.

it's pretty cliche, i’d fallen for him faster than i could catch myself.

it was beyond stupid feeling this way about him especially because i knew i’d never be able to tell him about it, because let’s be honest he only really sees me as a close friend and as he should, but i really wish he wouldn’t.

it had to be about two months since his and isabella’s relationship had started, it was bad enough him having her crush on her and talking about her all the time - now you have to sit and do everything with them.

i had to watch as she presses a kiss to his cheek before making her way to go and grab herself some juice from the cafeteria. carter smiling at the girl as she walked away before re-joining the conversation.

all i could do wish was that he would look at me the way he looked at her.

from time to time i think about how it could��ve been me in that position instead.

my legs slowly swung back and forth waiting for carter to show up, the anticipation made my heart only beat faster, but it soon slowed when i realised he wasn’t going to show up. i was waiting a whole two hours before i gave up and started to make my way back home.

the streetlights flickering on, and a light rain started pouring. great.

on the way home, i was trying to make up some sort of excuse for his tardiness. checking my phone every few minutes to see if he had messaged me, but nothing.

this was nothing a good ole’ milkshake couldn’t fix. my hand which was pressed against the glass to the door of the diner, i saw carter there and he certainly wasn’t alone. he was sharing a milkshake with her.

realising what i had just witnessed, i turned around with a heart full of hurt.

he ditched me for her? i don’t think i’ve seen him happier. who am i to ruin that?

my bottom lip wobbled as i continued my way on home.

putting myself through enough pain, i put my things away and made my way back to class as the bell rang. half listening to augie blabber on about a new badge that he was trying to achieve. 

too deep in thought to notice someone was very close behind me. all i felt was impact of the floor, after, realising carter had dragged me back a little too hard. obviously losing my balance from the sudden contact.

“woah! i didn’t think you’d fall over dude, im sorry.” carter, of course. he helped you up from up off of the floor and you continued your way back to class with a now sore ass.

“it's all good, it's not like it’s the first time you've done it before,” playfully nudging his arm with mine as we walked along to the scouts' room that soon stopped when isabella made an appearance and pushed me to the side.

i walked into the room silently, carter? of course, he didn't - as soon as he entered, he let out a huge burp, “was that really necessary carter?” scout leader rogers asked him and he muttered an apology.

whilst grant was getting lectured by rogers, i finally got time to talk with ben, he knew what was going on and how i felt about his other close friend, “hey dude, how are you feeling?” i slightly leaned onto his shoulder and whispered to him.

he looked down at you and lightly shrugged, “isabella is starting to get on my nerves too.” you moved way and to look back at him and he nods.

i leant back into my own space to get ready to hear about recruiting more scouts, sighing deeply as i pick at my nails, bad habits die hard especially when you have anxiety.

“augie, a unicorn is gonna fly out of your ass before somebody joins,” carter huffed and sat down. as did ben, augie and i next to him. “carter! language.” rogers warned.

“he's right though, nobody's going to show up it's just a waste of time.” ben agrees.

“we got to have some sort of hope guys, i to joined late but i’m here right now,” i excitedly implied but was soon shut down by a rude comment by carter.

“y/n’s right! ye of little faith, where's the scout spirit?” everyone went silent before roger’s made an announcement, “well! we all know it's augie’s special night tonight” we all started clapping and cheering for him unenthusiastically, him appreciating the praise. 

© ruewrote.

[thuganomxcs]

SONGS TO WRITE YUSUKE:  whether  it  be  melodies  that  give  you  inspiration  for  your  muse  or  songs  that  get  you  into  the  writing  mood   —   pick  10  songs  you  find  that  give  you  the  urge,   the  drive,   or  the  creativity  to  write  your  muse   !!

1. Battle scars - Lupe Fiasco, Guy Sebastian.

“These battle scars, don’t look like they’re fading. Don’t look like they’re ever goin’ away. They ain’t ever gonna change.” Despite this giving me break up vibes, those lyrics gives me so much Yusuke vibes post the dark tournament. He’s dealt with two ‘deaths’ in his life in one little instances and it’s really left scars on him. It was at the moment Yusuke truly felt as though he’s taken the time he’s spent with his loved ones for granted and he’d be damned if he doesn’t cherish them even more now.

2. No love - Eminem ft Lil Wayne.

“I’m giving no mercy mark my words, ain’t letting up, relentless I smell blood. Don’t give a fuck. keep givin’ ‘em hell, where was you when I fell and needed help up?” Definitely one of those early pre-season one vibes with this song. This song definitely helps me vibe with Yusuke’s life before he got his life together. Back where people hated him without TRULY knowing him, the time where Keiko was the only one that shows any public kindness towards him. (I know you cared about him too in your own way Kuwabara, you’re still the GOAT.)

3. Judgment - Ryu ga Gotoku Zero .

“Wow, Breakin’ the law Breakin’ the world 壊せ 切り裂けTenderness” This entire song gives me Yusuke vibes, THANK GOD for Yakuza 0 because this lil piece here screams vibes for badboys. Whether it’s Yusuke during the start of the series or at the end of it, this song definitely reflects him in some way or another imo.

4. Daydream Generation.

“I know how it hurts when you been betrayed by people you trust, the pain never fades.” This is cheating considering it’s the ending of the entire series. I think this song could very well vibe with the entire cast to be honest but I always get a vibe to write as Yusuke when this pops on the playlist.

5.Old School - Overkill.

“They said that this would never last, we never gave a fuck!” This ENTIRE song is just attitude. It really vibes well with his flippant feelings for authority. Not to mention the name of the song is really tight if you’ve seen Yusuke in the ring.

6. Enemy - Imagine Dragons.

“Pray it away, I swear I’ll never be a saint no way.” I can honestly drop any single of imagine dragon,this one though..that ONE little sentence at the end is what gets me. It’s like Season 1 all over again, probably just those few minutes after he’s got ran over by car-chan. It’s kinda like ‘I got nothing but bad in me’ type of feeling when I hear it but OH he found out how wrong he was.

7. What about the rest of us - Action Bronson & Joey Badass.

“Lord have mercy, it’s the world we live in was only design for somebody wealthy.” To me this song speaks of how alienated Yusuke feels from the world around him. Like the song says with the prior statement, to him it really does feel like the world was made for the wealthy when people like him mean less than dirt to the ones with money.

8. Stand Proud - JJBA

“All right now. All right now. All right now 誇りのBullet (JOJO! JOJO! JOJO!)” This song itself is just hype. It was the chapter in the series I didn’t overall liked BUT I’d be damned if I don’t admit their openings were CLEAN. Either way just when this chorus hits I could literally that spark I need to get to my drafts. This is actually one of the songs that does play when i’m doin’ early morning drafts.

9. Headlights - Eminem ft Nate Reuss

“If the plane goes down, or if the crew can’t wake me up. Just know that I’m alright, I was not afraid to die.” This entire song is literally a redemption song. It gives me fees for both Yusuke and Atsuko, their relationship wasn’t perfect but there was still enough love there to fix them.

10. Dead and gone - T.I

“I turn my head to the east, I don’t see nobody by my side, I turn my head to the west, still nobody in sight.” This song right here is a letter to how much Yusuke’s friends and family shaped him by the end of the series. The old him was literally ‘dead and gone’.

tagged: @curseleads​ (thanks for tagging the boy)

tagging: @universestreasures​ (yusei), @pluviacuratio​ , @theothervonkarmagirl​ , @healingwords​ (ann), @adamnedmartyr​ , @xkokuryuhax​ , @chibitantei​ , @solforger​ , @acandlelitdeath​ , steal it homies

[anonymous-swiftie]

If you are on twitter, please retweet this:

https://twitter.com/ASwiftie00/status/1334245577933148164?s=19

Dear #Swifties,

I'm new on tumblr, and I really don't know how to use it.

I know you are the best supporters of the music industry and I'm here to ask your help.

I'm fighting with a crippling depression, that due this covid situation just got worse.

I'm at my lowest, I truly don't know if I will make it through this time.

I always dreamed to talk to Taylor, since I was a teenager. She is the only one that make me feel like I do fit in this world.

I've created this account because I know she is very active here, and I'm trying to reach her with this part of my story.

You can read everything below.

I didn't write any personal information because I don't want this to be seen by my family or somebody that can recognise me.

I don't want upset anyone.

I know that everyone hope to meet or chat with her, and so you are probably wondering why you have to share this here.

You're totally right, maybe it's a stupid idea to ask you this, but I haven't anything left in my pocket to fight this situation, and you're my only hope right now.

Thank you.

#taylor #swift

*******************************************

Dear Taylor,

I keep writing and deleting this, over and over again.

I feel so dumb to write my personal story here, but this truly is my last chance to feel better and try to overcome this giant monster called depression.

I genuinly don't know if I can make it through this year. It's the worst period of my entire life and i don't even know if it's worth living this hell anymore.

I know you have millions of supporters (that probably write you every single day, and they are all better fans than I am, that's for sure) but I know that you proved, time after time, to be so down to earth and to use your time to read your fans messages.. so, in this moment, I'm just trying to share a part of my story with you.

You are the one that make feel understood, since I was like 13teen.

I'm so sorry if my English isn't very good but I'll do my best.

I'm not very active on social media , because I'm very shy when I have to talk about myself.. but If this could work, I must do it.

I will try to send a letter, If I can find the strength to mark this feeling on paper.

**IF I'M WRITING TO SOMEBODY FROM HER STAFF, PLEASE JUST LET THIS MESSAGE REACH TAYLOR**

I'll try now to resume, because I don't want to bother you too much.

This has been a crazy year so far, and the all the time I spent by myself during the lockdown didn't help at all.

This situation brought me back to childhood.

I spent a lot of my days back and forth in hospitals, due to my allergies.

I had to wear a mask all the time I wanted to go outside to avoid severe allergic reaction (that's why this Covid thing awakened some hurting memories)

I didn't have real friends back then, 'cause I've spent most of the summers at home, watching other kids playing around, from my window, or from the windows of my classroom.

It was so hard to make new friends, because the only thing that other kids saw was my mask.

I was the masked kid.

I was the strange kid.

I couldn't play with them.

Everytime I tried to play with them, the only thing I heard was "oh you are ill , I don't wanna be like you so stay away".

This situation made me start to write things in my personal diary.

I wrote small sentences, as a kid, and that was the only thing I could do alone inside an empty classroom during all summer.

This situation continued  for many years.

I wasn't the cool kid before, I wasn't the cool guy after.

The only things that let me enjoy those days were writing and listening to your songs.

I started to listen to your music thanks to my English teacher. She was a fan of folk and country music and she gave me a pic in which you were singing near a lake (I still have that photo somewhere, I strongly remember the white banner with your name written in red on it) and told me to listen to the cd she gave me that day.

I immediately fell in love (I think I still have a crush on you, I'm sorry).

I loved your album. I loved your voice. I loved the lyrics.

I remember having a "test" in school: each one of the class had to write their favourite lyrics and let the others guess the song.

If the someone guessed It, We could play the cd.

I chose Love Story and I translated it in Italian.

The class guessed the song, and I played it.

After the lunch break I went back to my desk and I saw some bullies that were breaking my cd-album and they started to laugh at me because I loved your music an I loved writing poems.

I was a boy so I was a loser because I enjoyed those things.

That felt terrible, but I continued to love your songs even more .

Those were my inspiration to write and to study english.

I felt so good when I listened to your album and this still happens.

Then I went to a private high-school.

Nothing changed, I still was the nerd guy that always got good grades and I have to say that the first year was quite good, but the second year was the start of the apocalypse.

I choose that school because two girls that I knew from childhood went there.

One of the cool new guys started to spread a fake "news" about me.

He said to everyone that I was the boyfriend of one of the two girls that I mentioned before.

So he was the cool guy and one of the girls believed him and told me to f*** myself.

The other girl was her best friend, so you could imagine by what happened next.

After 14 year spent together, I was nobody.

I didn't have "friends" in that class anymore.

I didn't say hello to anybody for 4 years, and nobody would say anything to me.

Nobody to talked with me.

That's great when you're a teenager.

I hated to wake up every morning.

I had an eating disorder, I lost like 22pounds in less than a month. Got hospitalized twice. I kept vomiting for 3 years, every single morning before school.

During that time I only talked with one of my cousins, who lived like 2 hours by car from me.

He was older than me but he always tried to help.

He knew that I loved to write poems so he started to give me guitar lessons.

I made it through a lot of things thanks to him.

I'm sorry, It's hard for me to write this part of the story.

I still get emotional when I think about this.

On the 10TH of December 2013 (some days after his birthday) we received a phone call from his mother: She warned us that he didn't return home after the last working shift.

I wrote a message to him like 3 hours prior to that phone call.

Never had the opportunity to get a reply again.

This year is the seventh year that he is missing.

That destroyed me.

I felt empty.

I felt like nothing couldn't help me.

I still feel that everytime I care about someone in my life, it will disappear someday.

This have happened several other times.

You know when ignorants say that men don't cry, is real bullshit. Men cry. I cried a lot.

I wrote so many poems , lyrics, thoughts in that period of time, that I destroyed my hands.

That was the only way to close my eyes and let me reach another reality because the real one was way too much for me.

Be a sensible man in this world is somehow a curse.

All these things made me afraid  even to hug someone 'cause I feel I'm too ugly or just to scared to be refused.

I will stop here my story, but there's so much more to tell.

I make it through all of these things and memories because I keep dreaming that one day I could meet you and we could talk together.

Dreaming about the fact I could spend a day with you made me find the power to battle my depression.

I'm 25 now and this year I'm not dreaming anymore.

I was going to start again university, I wanted to get a degree in marketing and have the chance to live in the us.

For years I believed that I would make it and hopefully be part of your marketing team.

I'm so stupid. All these years I kept dreaming to avoid pain.

I wanted to pursue my passion and continue to write lyrics but all I was doing was putting myself in unrealistic realities.

This covid situation made everything clear.

When everyone had someone to facetime (or video call) I was alone.

When everyone had someone asking them "how are you?" I only had myself looking in the mirror saying: "Will I ever feel better?"

I've never been the one for anybody, and I think I'll never be.

I won't be the one among all your fans to realize his dream.

Nobody likes me, and I'm exposing myself once again just because I want the opportunity to smile at something that could happen to me.

I'm tired to smile only for others best moments.

I've always seen the sun through a window.

I want to feel happy.

I want to burn my face with the sun.

I'm so sick of hiding my pain,

sick to cry when I'm alone in my car before going to work,

sick to let my eyes rain on my pillow every night.

I'm sick to say to my mother that I'm fine, just because I don't want to make her feel bad.

It's not her fault.

She is battling with a degenerative autoimmune disease, why I should put other weight on her shoulders?

I didn't give up to my weakness before because I don't want to hurt her.

I always say to her that soon she will feel better, that's why your song It's stuck in my head.

But when she won't be here anymore, how I can go through all of that?

I don't even know if will ever get better for me.

Will this pain ever stop?

Sometimes it's so hard to live and so easy to die.

Hope that my dream to spend some time with you can become true.

Thank you for everything, you gave me the strength to go on for many years.. But this time is so hard to put on my armor and continue this battle.

But is this even worth if thy I try to surround myself with people and I always feel lonely?

D.

@taylorswift @taylornation @jackleopards-thedolphinclub

[randomfandomimagine]

A Whisper Among The Noise (Clark Kent x Reader)

Character: Clark Kent

Fandom: Superman/Man of Steel (DCEU)

Tags: Songfic, angst with a happy ending, pining

Warnings: A bit angsty in the middle

Word Count: 2,1k words

Requested by @caritobbg​: Hello again!!! ❤️ I'm still in love with "I Still Love You" whith Jaskier 😍❤️ hahahaha I'm gonna ask if you could write another ficlet songfic with Clark Kent x Fem! Reader? 😍 The song's called Secret Love Song p.II by Little Mix ❤️ Reader's in love with him, but when she founds out about a mysterious girl that he likes, she felt so bad and sing that song infront of everyone at an after-office party. Then, Clark tell her that she's that girl 😍 Love your blog!!!! 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

A/N: Better late than never 😅 By this point I was running out of inspiration a bit, but I still kind of like the result and I hope you love it! Thanks for being so lovely and patient and understanding. Enjoy!! 💜

Clark Kent x Gender Neutral Reader

_

You absently scratched your nail against the ridges on the red solo cup you were holding and that you had barely drank a sip of. The party was lively and loud, and although you didn’t regret coming, you were starting to feel a bit restless. Everyone was shouting over the music and chatting in groups, and after you had said hello to them, you were now hiding in the corner as you felt your social battery drain.

A hand softly pressed against your arm, and you would have been startled by the sudden contact as well as by the promise of new interaction if it weren’t for whom that hand belonged to. You could tell it was him not only by the gentle way in which he called you, but also the unmistakable way his touch made you feel. Warm, flustered, loved. The butterflies returned to your stomach, like they had never left ever since the last time you talked to him.

“Y/N” His deep voice enveloped you as you turned around to face him.

“Hey, Clark” You didn’t speak too loudly, but he seemed to hear you nonetheless.

“What…” He began to say, but he paused and leaned closer to your ear so you could understand him over the blasting speakers. “What are you doing here all alone?”

Suddenly feeling self-conscious, even under the fond way in which he watched you, you shrugged your shoulders. Wanting to distract yourself from the intense way he made you feel, you continued to play with the cup in your hands.

Why can't I hold you in the street? Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor? I wish that it could be like that Why can't it be like that? 'Cause I'm yours Why can't I say that I'm in love? I wanna shout it from the rooftops I wish that it could be like that Why can't it be like that? 'Cause I'm yours

 “Well, I…” Knowing he expected an answer, you made an effort to reply and raise your voice enough so that he could hear you. “I guess I’m a bit over it already”

When you looked up at him, you saw Clark dedicating you an understanding smile. His hand, which still lingered on your arm, carefully squeezed you.

“Would you like me to drive you home?”

“I wouldn’t want you to leave the party early because of me…”

“I don’t mind at all” His smile widened, acquiring an inviting expression. “I don’t like parties that much anyway”

“You really wouldn’t mind?” Your hand fell atop of his, timid and longing.

“It would be my pleasure” Clark dedicated you that smile, the one that light up your entire world.

The two of you paused, lingering on your reciprocal touch, and stared at the other. At that time, the music in the background seemed to dim. Perhaps it was because of your heart beating wildly in your chest, all the more with each second that your touch and his continued. Or maybe it was that the intensity of your gazes that made everything around you duller.

When your eyes drifted down to his lips, like they had a mind of their own, you had to bite your lip not to audibly gasp. You inched closer to his mouth on an instinct, ever so slightly, so little in fact that he didn’t seem to notice.

“Come on” He finally said, moving his hand to gently push it against the small of your back. “Let’s get you home”

You obeyed, hoping you weren’t blushing as his hand also lingered in that new spot. Titling your head down, you started walking towards the exit. Your mind boiled with thoughts, all regarding the very man that so kindly insisted in personally accompanying you home.

_

When Clark stopped the car, it felt like all the questions fighting for attention in your brain only grew louder with the absence of the party music. Like every time you interacted, he was the perfect gentleman, a sweetheart, always kind and thoughtful and gentle. Back at the party, you had been even closer than ever. All those stolen moments you shared paled in comparison to that one. Surely, he must have noticed your moment of weakness and decided not to act on it, to pretend like he didn’t realize. He couldn’t be that oblivious.

It made sense, seeing as his heart was apparently taken. There were rumors in the office, of Clark being hung up on someone. He always seemed absent-minded, lost in a beautiful romantic daydream of that special person. If only you could be so lucky, but having your feelings reciprocated felt like an impossible dream. You could see that now, clear as day despite the darkness that surrounded you.

“Are you okay?” Clark’s husky voice startled you slightly in the stillness of the car. “You’re very quiet”

“I was just wondering…” You dared to look him in the eyes, forgetting how beautiful and piercing they were. For a moment, it took your breath away. “Are the rumors true? Do you… are you… and someone in the office…?”  

“Maybe… why do you ask?” He attentively stared at you, but his tender expression wasn’t endearing this time. It was heartbreaking, because someone else caused it.

“I…” Unprompted, a deep sadness overwhelmed you. The electric magic that seemed to fill the air whenever he was around disappeared, replaced with a cold void.

“Y/N, what’s wrong?” Clark placed a hand on your wrist, but this time the gesture didn’t feel as lovely either. “You’re acting strange”

Tears arrived to your eyes. You had a sudden realization that, no matter how close and intimate you got with Clark, it would never be enough. He was thinking of someone else.

Every time I see you, I die a little more Stolen moments that we steal as the curtain falls It'll never be enough As you drive me to my house I can't stop these silent tears from rolling down You and I both have to hide on the outside Where I can't be yours and you can't be mine

But I know this, we got a love that is homeless

Was he really that blind to your love to give you hope? Especially when his harbored someone else? Was that undeniable connection doomed because of another person?

He was staring at you, yet again expecting an answer. His insistent gaze made your heart race, made you flustered as usual. This wasn’t fair…

“I’m in love with you” You spit out before you could stop yourself.

The silence seemed to grow. It loomed over you, lurking in order to swallow you at any moment, and take your empty heart with it.

“Oh…” Clark retrieved his hand, dragging his fingers along your skin.

Feeling all kinds of stupid and hopeless, you averted your gaze. Your wrist felt cold and hot at the same time. That spot missed his touch, but it remembered it.

“I’ll…” He cleared his throat. “I’ll walk you to the door”

Moving your head so he couldn’t see your face, you looked out the window. He stayed in the seat, so you nodded your head without making eye contact. When you made to open the door, he exited the car himself.

In the time that it took him to round the vehicle to reach the copilot door, you took a deep breath to calm yourself. You didn’t want him to know how much you were hurting. It would only make things worse.

It's obvious you're meant for me Every piece of you, it just fits perfectly Every second, every thought, I'm in so deep But I'll never show it on my face

Before he could, you opened the door and walked out of the car. There stood Clark’s tall figure, illuminated by a streetlight behind him and making him look like an angel in a halo. You and him… it would have been too good to be true.

You started walking to your front door, with him standing by you and watching your every move. He was worried, and you could tell. You couldn’t even be mad at him or that person that stole his love. After all, you wanted him to be happy, even if it was with somebody else.

As you walked, you subtly wiped the tears from your cheeks and busied yourself with getting your keys out. They rattled in the silence of the night, making your ears ring. It was the only sound filling the void other than your slow, feeble footsteps. Your front door was closer each second, and with that a sense of anticipated relief reached you bit by bit, desperately attempting to take over the hurt.

“Y/N?” Clark piped up, but you didn’t feel strong enough to hear what he wanted to say.

“Thanks for taking me home” Was all you told him, already lifting your arm with your keys prepared.

“Wait” He spoke in an ushered whisper, delicately stopping your hand when you were opening the door. His fingers were warm even in that chilly night. “I don’t think you understood me before”

“You don’t have to explain” You told him, mentally begging him to stop talking. “Really, Clark”

“I do” His grip on your wrist tightened a little. “Because I am in love with that someone…”

“Clark…” You began, gritting your teeth and struggling to keep faking.

“Will you look at me?” His hand gingerly rested against your cheek, tilting your head so you reluctantly stared into his blue eyes. “That someone is you… how could you think it was anyone but you?”

You gawked at him, unable to believe him. He backed off slightly, letting go of your wrist and giving you some space. As usual, he seemed to know exactly what you needed.

“Why didn’t you tell me before?” You weren’t angry, you weren’t sad, nor disappointed. Shock was the only thing you could feel among the sea of emotions that threatened to drown you.

“I thought you knew…” He continued, given your quietness. “I was waiting for a sign”

“A sign?”

“A sign that you… loved me back”

“I knew you loved someone, I just… I never thought it was me…”

Clark frowned, seemingly as heartbroken as you were. He made to touch you again, but this time he hesitated. You could see it in his eyes, the regret and guilt and fear. After all this time being so unapologetically affectionate, he was afraid to hurt you again. He was afraid to harm you in any way, even if it hadn’t been his intention. All that pain and uncertainty… it was all for nothing. Clark loved you, he always had. There was no one else, only you.

“I’m sorry if I ever hurt you” Once again, he read you like an open book. He knew you so well, and he cared so much, that he read your thoughts.

“Get out of my head…” You spoke in a whisper, fascinated by him.

Relieved by the shift in the atmosphere, from tense and sad to hopeful and light, he chuckled. His brow was still furrowed, but now it showcased that fondness from always. Knowing what you did now, you realized it wasn’t only that. It was fondness, and an absolute adoration that you were surprised not to have seen until then. It was always there, you were just too blind and too afraid to see it.

“Can I…?” Clark began, but you interrupted him.

“Yes” You replied before he could finish the question, you knew what he was going to say anyways. And the answer was yes, one hundred times yes.

He smiled and moved closer to you. Feeling his warmth in the chilly night, you shivered as he lovingly wrapped his arms around you. Like they belonged there and always had, your hands settled on his chest. He deeply breathed in, as though he couldn’t contain such emotion. Then, he finally leaned in.

Your eyes closed at the touch of his lips, feeling goose bumps now that it finally happened. He held you tight at last, tighter, as tight as he could, as he pressed you against him. Your hands went up to his shoulders, holding on to him as your legs threatened to give in under the weight of your immeasurable happiness.

The kiss was magical, warm, passionate and tender. It was loving and sweet and cathartic. When it ended after a few seconds, you slowly opened your eyes. Clark was staring at you, receiving you with a bright smile. He didn’t say anything, but you understood anyway.

There was no noise anymore and he didn't have to whisper in your ear, but he still reached you deeply. He saw you in ways no one else could, he talked to you and read you without the need of words, and that kiss was proof of it all, like a whisper among the noise.

Tag list: @call-me-harley-quinn​ / @wonderlandfandomkingdom​ / @locke-writes​ / @lotsoffandomrecs​ / @emmacata​ / @scared-to-be-lonely345​ / @everyday-imfangirling​ / @danietoww04​ / @sylleblossomstar​ // If you want to be added or taken off the tag list for these fandoms or characters, send me an ask!! // Feedback and reblogs are appreciated!

[modern-naiad]

Angst Fic Songs

Here is a list of songs I believe would make wonderful angsty fics, use the lyrics or just get inspired! There is a Spotify link is at the end, have fun writing and be sure to tag me if you use one of these, I'd love to see the end product! 

Back to Black- Amy Winehouse

The Night We Met- Lord Huron

You’re Somebody Else- Flora Cash

What Now- Rihanna

Stay- Rihanna ft. Mikky Ekko

Misery- Maroon 5

Skinny Love -Birdy/Bon Iver

Slow Dancing in the Dark- Joji

Die For You- The Weeknd

Mr. Brightside- The Killers

Who- Lauv ft. BTS

Amnesia- 5 Seconds of Summer

Ghost of You- 5 Seconds of Summer

Landslide- Dixie Chicks

Somebody I Used to Know- Gyote

Somebody Else- The 1975

Infinity- One Direction

From the Dining  Table- Harry Styles

This Town- Niall Horan

When I Was Your Man- Bruno Mars

All I Ask- Adele

Someone Like You- Adele

When We were Young - Adele

You Belong With me- Taylor Swift

Back to December- Taylor Swift

Drew Barrymore- SZA

Pictures of Us- The Vamps

One- Mary J. Blige & U2

Linger- The Cranberries

We Don’t Talk Anymore- Charlie Puth & Selena Gomez

What Hurts The Most- Rascal Flatts

Need You Now- Lady A

Not Over You- Gavin DeGraw

Leave (Get out)- Jojo

The One That Got Away- Katy Perry

A Thousand Miles- Vanessa Carlton

You- Regard, Troye Sivan. Tate McRae

good 4 u- Olivia Rodrigo

I Hope- Gabby Barrett ft. Charlie Puth

Beautiful Liar- Beyonce, Shakira

July- Noah Cyrus

As the World Caves In- Sarah Cothran

I Don't Do Drugs- Doja Cat ft. Ariana Grande

How Do You Sleep- Sam Smith

Talk to You- Ricky Montgomery

Here is the link to the Spotify playlist:

 https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1k3WhjCnDEx8Ux9HAsjqQ1

Feel free to reblog 💕

Fluffy fic songs

updated 7/20/21

<3 @marvel-ing-at-it-all

[firstaidspray]

OC Tag - Song Challenge

step 1 →create your oc (or ocs) in this picrew

step 2 → list 5 songs that inspired (or capture the feel of) your oc. if you chose multiple, feel free to pick your favorite or do songs for all of ‘em! (and feel free to list fewer or more songs if you want)

I decided I wanted to redo this and put it under a readmore without the meanings lol, and do it for a couple more of my ocs because they have really really good playlists and I'd like to share some of that with you all. Even if you don't care. Too bad.

Reverie (The Righteous Gemstones)

1. Bitch by Meredith Brooks

I'm a bitch, I'm a tease / I'm a goddess on my knees / When you hurt, when you suffer / I'm your angel undercover / I've been numb, I'm revived / Can't say I'm not alive / You know I wouldn't want it any other way

2. She Talks To Angels by The Black Crowes

She keeps a lock of hair in her pocket / she wears a cross around her neck / yeah, the lock of hair is from a little boy / and the cross is someone she has not met / not yet

3. Halo by Soil

Bitter sins, how they grow within / so you tell me it ain't right / I am all sins / and you're my reason for life

4. Follow Me Down by The Pretty Reckless

Nights avoiding things unholy / your hand slips across my skin / I go down on you so slowly / don't confess none of your sins

5. Pain Lies on the Riverside by Live

I have forever, always tried / to stay clean and constantly baptized / I'm aware that the river's banks, they are dry / and to wait for a flood / is to wait for life

Juliette Chrysler (Vice Principals / Killing It)

1. Homecoming Queen by Hinder

A shame, shame, shame that our homecoming queen / had a lot to prove and so many to please / she's just somebody's daughter / just looking for somebody to love her

2. I Want You to Want Me by Letters to Cleo

I want you to want me / I need you to need me / I'd love you to love me / I'm begging you to beg me

3. #1 Crush by Garbage

Violate all my love that I'm missing / throw away all the pain that I'm living / you will believe in me / and I can never be ignored

4. Girl Next Door by Saving Jane

I get a little bit / she gets a little more / she's Miss America / and I'm just the girl next door

5. Brown Eyed Girl by Everclear

Now that the years gone by / yeah, now that I'm on my own / I saw you just the other day / oh my, baby you have grown

Dolly Dobson (The Devil's Rejects)

1. Be Yourself by Audioslave

Even when you've paid enough / been pulled apart / or been held up / every single memory of / the good or bad, faces of love / don't lose any sleep tonight / I'm sure everything will end up alright / you may win or lose

2. If You Could Only See by Tonic

Seems the road less traveled / shows happiness unraveled / and you got to take a little dirt / to keep what you love / that's what you gotta do

3. Letter to God by Hole

I've lost all self-esteem / by burying everything / and I feel nothing, nothing

4. Lady Picture Show by Stone Temple Pilots

She hides because she don't know nothin' / don't know nothin' anymore / she keeps a funny face / it's locked and bagged / it's just outside the door

5. Killpop by Slipknot

Will she ever find / one million of a kind? /it's cold and lonely / but that's because she told me / lost inside her dirty world / no one hurts this pretty girl but her

Gehenna (Hellraiser)

1. Gehenna by Slipknot

Free my severed heart / give me you / I want it / I don't wanna be myself

2. You've Seen the Butcher by Deftones

You slowly enter / 'cause you know my room / you crawl your knees off / and then you shake my tomb

3. Adrenalize by In This Moment

I crave excess, turning wine into sweat / dripping down my neck / I can't deny, I'd die without this / make me feel like a God, adrenaline and sex

4. Judith by A Perfect Circle

It's not like you killed someone / it's not like you drove a hateful spear into his side / praise the one who left you / broken down and paralyzed / he did it all for you

5. Ouija Board by Chevelle

Never say die unless you mean it / you're the salt of the earth left uneasy / right or wrong, if the world explodes / well you and I are one

[lauwrite1225]

And there it is! 500 followers! Thank you so much guys, you really are amazing and i love you all very much 💕

As promised, here's a challenge!

Rules :

A prompt consist into a few lyrics of a song. You can write whatever these few lines inspire you, but you can also use the full song if you prefer! Here's a playlist with all the songs.

Same goes for moodboards!

I almost only write The Last Kingdom, but you're not limited to only this fandom, Star Wars, Shadow and Bone and Vikings are also very welcomed!

It can be x OC, reader or character x character, or no ship at all! You're totally free!

You can be 2 to pick the same prompt and you can pick maximum 2.

Smut is allowed ;)

Send an ask or reply to the post with your prompt

Deadline : 31th july (but i'm not strict on it, change can happen, it's fine if you are late :) )

When you post, put the #Lau500Followers and tag me!

And the most important : HAVE FUN

Prompts list :

1. Little Lion Man - Mumford & Sons @maggiescarborough

But it was not your fault but mine

And it was your heart on the line

I really fucked it up this time

Didn't I, my dear?

2. Scared to be lonely - Dua Lipa, Martin Garrix @emilyhufflepufftlk @morosemagick

Is it just our bodies? Are we both losing our minds?

Is the only reason you're holding me tonight

'Cause we're scared to be lonely?

Do we need somebody just to feel like we're alright?

Is the only reason you're holding me tonight

'Cause we're scared to be lonely?

3. Fourth of July - Fall out Boys @flowers-in-your-hayr

I'll be as honest as you let me

I miss your early morning company

If you get me

You are my favorite "what if"

You are my best "I'll never know"

4. The Enemy - Andrew Belle

Don't try to follow me

I would hold you down if I could

Make you the enemy

I would let you down

5. Forest Fire - Brighton @solinarimoon

I keep imagining those flames that did rise

And blackened up the sky

The light that showed you barefoot in the snow

And then the fire started building up inside

Exploding blinding lights

Now I'm the one left screaming through the night

6. Gone, gone, gone - Philips Philips

When enemies are at your door

I'll carry you way from war

If you need help, if you need help

Your hope dangling by a string

I'll share in your suffering

To make you well, to make you well

7. I Walk the Line - Johnny Cash (Halsey's Cover)

You've got a way to keep me on your side

You give me cause for love that I can't hide

For you I know I'd even try to turn the tide

Because you're mine, I walk the line

8. Somewhere only we know - Keane @for-bebbanburg @geekandbooknerd

And if you have a minute, why don't we go

Talk about it somewhere only we know?

This could be the end of everything

So why don't we go somewhere only we know?

Somewhere only we know

9. Somebody to die for - Hurts @unlockyourmind-wp

Because no matter where they take me

In death I will survive

And I will never be forgotten

With you by my side

Cause I don't need this life

I just need...

Somebody to die for

10. You and I - PVRIS @magravenwrites

I know it's warmer where you are

And it's safer by your side

But right now I can't be what you want

Just give it time

I tag the few people who were interested ;) @morosemagick @maggiescarborough @solinarimoon @for-bebbanburg @emilyhufflepufftlk @flowers-in-your-hayr

[dolceminerva97]

♪Tina's Music Snippets #1: The Fall of the Pilot.

Agustina flies over the South Atlantic Sea, her attacks over the Royal Navy ships are quick and ferocious. Her gender doesn't stop her from being in the Air Force, for she is The Motherland.

Onboard the British ship there is someone who can sense her presence. Arthur commands the fleet not to attack that plane: he will take care of it, personally. There's no doubt she is piloting it; he can recognise the way she flies. He should know... he taught her himself.

Arthur manages to hit her just in the right spot. His motives are clear: he wants to damage the plane enough to force Tina to land without making it explode violently nor give Agustina any unnecessary fatal wound. She's not gonna die, so there's no need to hurt her too much. After all, Arthur's still shocked that he has to wage war against her on the first place.

The hit seems to be manageable and Agustina sets her course to land safely, but the situation escalates and she soon struggles to keep stability. The plane starts spiralling out of control.

The fall is imminent. Tina ejects herself on the last minute and lands in the cold, freezing water of the South Atlantic sea, near the coast of the islands. She manages to swim to the shore, where she immediately collapses due to hypothermia. Somebody will find her body, eventually....

Some songs make me imagine very vivid movie scenes with my oc's history — this is one of them. Since the actual idea is something impossible to draw, I figured I could do a "cover art" version to illustrate the concept.

I got partially inspired from a friend who incorporates music into her art, I've actually wanted to do this for a long time! I have other music snippets I'd like to illustrate if copyright happens to let me post them lol

Tina's soundtrack has a very distinct style for her different character arcs. Argentine progressive rock is the protagonist of this era of her life: 70s and 80s. Argentina went through violent and turbulent times that affected her psyche to a significant degree. Her traumatic experiences in Malvinas were the last nail in the coffin.

When I listen to this section of the song, an intense action scene comes to mind: it's a battle between pilot Tina vs Admiral Arthur during the Falklands war. The song has an intensity to it that illustrates their fight perfectly. I'm not very good at writing so I don't think I could ever explain with words the visual badassery that goes on my mind with this lmao. Still, in case you read it, I hope you could visualize a little of it while hearing the music YwY

[delightfullyatomicfest]

John and Yoko interview with Melody Maker pt 2

MELODY MAKER DECEMBER 13 1969- 

JOHN LENNON’S “PEACE Crusade” inspires a variety of emotions in people. Sadly, few of those emotions are worthy ones. John and Yoko have been mercilessly lampooned and vilified by the public and the mass media, and a great proportion of this reaction has been thoughtless and hurtful. 

It would surely have been enough to make any lesser man, whose heart was not in his cause, retire from the field to a more comfortable, less publicised existence. But not the Lennons. 

They have kept up their output of peaceful propaganda in the face of a ceaseless barrage of insults, and the time will surely come when even their most jaundiced and gout-ridden detractors will realise their essential honesty, and their right to exercise it in the way they most see fit. 

But like it or not, John Lennon and his lovely wife are in the process of becoming leaders in the public eye. They stand for a cause, and as public figures they can be held responsible for the failings and excesses of that cause. 

This is not how they want it. Leadership in any form is the last cloak which Lennon wishes to put on, as he told me. 

“I’m not falling for that one. Like Peter Seeger said, we don't have a leader but we have a song -‘Give Peace A Chance'. So I refuse to be leader, and I'll always showmy genitals or do something which prevents me from being Martin Luther King or Ghandi and getting killed. Because that’s what happens to leaders. Our whole mistake is having leaders and people we can rely on or point a finger at.” 

Yoko, as always at John's side, chipped in: “For instance, many people say if you want to do that kind of thing, about peace, don't do anything that is misleading like showing your genitals. Always keep a clean image so that people can believe in your peace movement. 

“But that's exactly what the establishment is doing (“And that's what the Beatles did too” - John) , taking their children to church on Sundays. 

This is showing that, ‘I'm the President of the United States and I'm alright and I'm healthy and very moral et cetera.' You don't get anywhere that way-you become just another hypocrite, and you're playing the establishment game. We don’t want to do that. We try to be honest and the point is, if we are really honest, just to make it between us is a lifetime thing, and if we can't make it together and endure each other, the world is nowhere. 

“If ordinary couples can make it together and make it with their children and so forth, love-wise (“She doesn't mean ‘make it' as you ‘lay"’ - John) , then you can look after the world.” 

John continued, “One thing we've found out is that love is a great gift, like a precious flower or something. You have to feed it and look after it, and it has storms to go through and snow, but you have to protect it. It's like a pet cat. You know, people get a cat and they don't want to feed it, or they get a dog and they don't want to walk it. But love has to be nurtured like a very sensitive animal, because that's what it is. 

“And you have to work at love; you don't just sit round with it and it doesn't just do it for you. You’ve got to be very careful with it; it’s the most delicate thingyou can be given. It's a very delicate situation.” 

What will John and Yoko do about Vietnam and Biafra, which John mentioned in the letter that accompanied his MBE back to the Queen? 

“We'll keep promoting peace in the way we do, which, whichever way you look at it, is our way, because we're artists and not politicians. We don't organise; we do itin the best way we know how, to make people aware that, if they want war to stop, only they can do it. 

“The politicians can’t do it. I think our whole movement is successful, as shown by Nixon, who's having to wriggle around a bit now and make propaganda films about the Moratorium claiming that the ‘silent majority' is with him, with a highly polished Negro in an Italian suit 

saying how great it is to be American. Nixon has been moved by the peace movement - that includes John and Yoko and all the people in the world who are doing it, and that’s how we're going to change it. We’re not going to Vietnam to die for it or going to Biafra to die for it. We’ve considered everything, not dying but going to the places. 

“People prefer a dead saint to a living annoyance like John and Yoko. But we don’t intend to be dead saints for people’s convenience. They prefer Ghandi and Martin Luther King since they died, but you should see them in India now, celebrating Ghandi Year - anything less like Ghandi's principles going on in India you’ve never seen. It’s a hoax. And so we don't intend to be dead saints - or living saints either. People don't like saints.” 

Their highly unusual Wedding Album has caused its share of controversy. Why did they make it? 

Yoko: “It's like a diary, it reflects our love and peace ideas.” 

John: “When people get married they usually make their own wedding albums. We're public personalities and I'd enjoy reading Jackie and Onassis' album. Our wedding was public, we were sharing our diaries and our feelings with the world. So one side shows our involvement with each other, and the other side shows what we do together outside of our involvement with each other, which is promote peace.” 

Isn't there a danger that the diary of Yoko and John will become too public? 

“We have nothing to hide. ‘ Everybody's got something to hide except for me and my monkey 9 , you know? We keep certain parts of our life private because we’re not as wild as people think. I doubt if we'll ever make love in public, or invite the TV cameras into our bedroom, and I doubt if I’ll ever go to the toilet in public. Just because I think some things, I don’t want to show that side of me.” 

Yoko: “We’re from a certain generation, you can’t deny that, and for people in our generation it is so difficult, and maybe the next John and Yoko will...” 

“Show all,” said John. “Maybe we will before we die. People hide themselves from each other all the time, and everybody’s frightened of saying something nice about somebody in case they don’t say anything nice back, or in case they get hurt, or of looking at somebody in case they say, ‘What are you looking at? ’ 

“Everybody’s so uptight and they’re always building these walls around themselves. All you can do is try and break the walls down and show that there’s nothing there but PEOPLE . It’s just like looking in the mirror, there’s nothing to worry about- it’s only people.” 

Yoko : “And even we are not relaxed enough as people. We have many complexities and tensions. We try hard to be honest and expose ourselves, but there are certain things that we just can’t. . . Maybe in the next generation they can, good luck to them. We’re trying hard as we are” 

John has always tried to carry out his philosophies and campaigns in a sense of fun. Are they, as some cynics suggest, in fact taking the mickey? 

“That’s true, although we’re not taking the mickey. Everybody’s frightened of being conned, of being tricked. If you say something nice to somebody they ’re not sure if you mean it, so that rather than respond to your loving movement they’ll rej ect you, and that’s what the press do . 

Because they’re frightened of what we did with the MBE about the Biafra thing, they’ll write about my Auntie Mimi’s reaction to me giving the MBE back, because they don’t want to fall for the con of ‘Is he joking? ’ 

“Of course we’re joking as well. We mustn’t take ourselves too seriously, otherwise it’s the end. We think the mistake of everyone - Ghandi and Martin Luther King AND the left wing AND the students and all society - is taking it too seriously. If you take it seriously, it IS serious. What we try and do is be non-serious about things, but we are very serious about being not serious.” 

Yoko : “We maybe too serious, even. We try to have a sense of humour and we try to smile at everyone a really genuine smile from the bottom of our hearts. But it’s very difficult for our generation to really genuinely smile, but we’re trying.” 

John: “It’s like when I sent the MBE back, and I wrote that it was against Britain’s involvement in Biafra and Vietnam and against ‘Cold Turkey’ slipping down the charts. When we thought of that we were screaming with laughter, and so a few snobs and hypocrites got very upset about mentioning ‘Cold Turkey’ with the problem of Biafra and Vietnam, but that saved it from being too serious and being another colonel protesting! You have to try and do every thing with humour, and keep smiling.” 

Richard Williams 

[anarmorofwords]

so because of all the music talk today I thought i'll finally share my Matthew playlist, ft. a selection of some particularly fitting lyrics etc. - inspired by @itsjusta-j-really's format I'm just putting them under the cut (also because there's A Lot)

warning: many songs on this playlist deal with heavy topics, such as addiction, suicidal thoughts etc., so please keep that in mind

also, you might cry, I'm not sorry

gonna tag @thepictureofsdr @underestimatedgenius too because you like Matthew so maybe you'd be interested

false confidence - Look at you all dressed up for someone you never see// You're here for a reason but you don't know why (...) Don't let those demons in again// I fill the void up with polished doubt, fake sentiment// Surrender yourself

redemption - Father, help me, do you understand?// All my life, I've been a wicked man// Show me mercy and comfort me// I need to find redemption (...) I've never been this far from peace// I'm disappearing out of reach again

achilles come down - I'll just say read this post

spirits - I got guns in my head and they won't go// spirits in my head and they won't go (...) I'll be a dreamer 'til the day I die// and they say, oh, how the good die young?

I'll be good - I thought I saw the devil, this morning// Looking in the mirror, drop of rum on my tongue (...) My past has tasted bitter for years now (...) I've been cold, I've been merciless// But the blood on my hands scares me to death// Maybe I'm waking up today

comfort crowd - This hurt that I'm holding's getting heavy// but I'ma keep a smile on my shoulders 'til I'm sweaty (...) Telling you, "I'm fine I don't really need nobody"// but you say through a sigh// that I said that lie already

broken - If you see the boy I used to be// could you tell him that I'd like to find him// and if you see the shell that's left of me// could you spare him a little kindness *sobs*

dancing with the devil - It's just a little red wine, I'll be fine (...) // twisted reality, hopeless insanity// I told you I was okay, but I was lying

when you wash your hair - You did some things that you forgot// drinking wine and smoking pot// you tried to be someone you are not

the fire - 'Cause I've been a devil, I've been a saint// somebody help me, I can't change (...) Ashes in the cold, now I'm running toward the fire// (Runnin' toward, runnin' toward the fire)

mad world - all around me are familiar faces// worn out places, worn out faces (...) And I find it kind of funny// I find it kind of sad// the dreams in which I'm dying// are the best I've ever had

four - *inhales**cries* In this game of hide and seek// I can't help but think that ordinary has swallowed the key// bodies fashioned out of dirt and dust// for a moment we get to be glorious (...) Maybe my heart needs to break to be sure (...) I lost my balance when I needed it most (...) I'm stuck swimming in shadows down here// it's been forever since I came up for air

unsteady - Mama, come here// approach, appear// daddy, I'm alone// 'cause this house don't feel like home (...) whoa, if you love me, don't let go// Hold, hold on, hold onto me// 'cause I'm a little unsteady

ready to go - Jackie's just 17, and hard to please (...) You don't know what she's seen, or where she's been// The devil's dancing toe to toe// when the reaper comes, I'll be ready to go

the show must go on - The show must go on, yeah// inside my heart is breaking// my makeup may be flaking// but my smile, still, stays on (...) another heartache, another failed romance, on and on// does anybody know what we are living for?

tortured soul - Whiskey taste is on my breath// part of me is scared to death// what if I told you the truth? One more sip for a tortured soul// your diggin' my heart in deeper hole// and a thousand thoughts going through my mind

icarus - look who's digging their own grave// That is what they all say; you'll drink yourself to death (...) Icarus is flying too close to the sun// and Icarus' life, it has only just begun (...) Standing on the cliff face, highest fall you'll ever grace// it scares me half to death// look out to the future, but it tells you nothing

perfect places - every night, I live and die// feel the party to my bones (...) meet somebody, take 'em home// let's kiss and then take off our clothes (...) meet somebody, take 'em home// let's kiss and then take off our clothes

sinners - I'll be drinking late with you// until the morning comes around (...) Yeaaah, I must be good for something// yeaaah, yeaah, yeah// oh sinners come down, come gather 'round (...) Drinking gin and dropping lines// wasting beats in this heart of mine// until the morning comes around

monster - If you knew the truth, you'd probably hate me// (...) I need a fight// I've got you, in my sights// only one of us will make it out alive// I'm turning into a monster // My tongue is a weapon and I'm locked and loaded (...) Delirium takes over me// you're just another casualty

play with fire - Insane, inside the danger gets me high// Can't help myself got secrets I can't tell (...) Fire, fire // I've always liked to play with fire// oh, watching as the flames get higher

monster - Ever since I could remember, Everything inside of me, Just wanted to fit in (oh, oh, oh) I was never one for pretenders (...) Everything I touch isn't dark enough// If the problem lies in me

[justahopelessssromantic]

Somebody That I Used To Know

A/N: Thank you so much for this idea @gemini0410 💖 I hope you like it! Just a little something inspired by the song Somebody That I Used To Know by Gotye

If you would like to be added to any of my tag lists please just let me know! The same goes for if you ever want to be removed from any 😊 and if for some reason I don’t have you on one that you should be just let me know please ❤️ Thank you all so much for reading and your continued support! 

*gif not mine*

Warnings: Angst

Word Count: 1185

Angel and your relationship was perfect, or at least it seemed that way at first. Now you were just strangers who would pass each other on the streets every now and then getting a glimpse of the other’s life without you. You never expected things to end as ugly as they did but they had and now everything was different. 

Angel watched as you walked by hand in hand with your new man glancing his way. Whenever he saw your face it would bring back so many memories of your time together and he would wonder how it came to this. 

Neither one of you were truly happy in your relationship but still you were a big part of each other’s lives. The time you shared together meant something to Angel regardless so the fact you cut him off completely when all was said and done stung. Now when you would bump into each other you treated him like a stranger, like it all meant nothing to you which only twisted him up more.  

The beginning of the relationship seemed so blissful. You were so happy, so in love it was infectious. Angel would find himself feeling light, being tricked into believing he felt the same way as you but in truth he didn’t. Still seeing you happy was enough for him to stay, for him to pretend that he was happy and maybe just maybe in time he would be. 

You used to say you were so happy you could die. 

The longer your relationship went on the harder it was for him to ignore. No matter what he did he still felt incredibly lonely in the relationship which led him to throw himself more into his work with the rebels. The more he was away from you the lonelier you became too. 

You stuck it out a little longer. You could say the two of you were even addicted to the certain kind of sadness you had found yourselves in. One day you had had enough and you called it off. There was lots of yelling and screaming, neither one of you wanted to admit just how toxic your relationship had become but finally when the dust settled you had decided it was for the best. You just didn’t make sense together. 

You said that you could still be friends even though you didn’t believe it deep down. 

“Angel this will only work if you promise you won’t get hung up on me.” You had said. You knew how clingy Angel could get. That was part of the reason your relationship went on for so long. He just needed someone in his life who was all his and for a while that was you. 

“I won’t. I promise, querida.” And he meant it at first. He wanted to be able to stay connected to you somehow but the split rocked him. He wasn’t happy or in love with you but he got used to having you there to fall back on after a long day. 

Now he had no one so in those late drunken hours of the night he would call you. You would ignore them but it became too much. You knew you should not have believed him and did what you should have done the minute the split was finalized, change your phone number. It was hard but you had to cut him off, not only for yourself but for him too. 

You caught eyes with him offering a small smile as you walked by not exchanging any words with him. Each encounter with you was just more painful than the last. Angel could not understand how you had become a stranger, how you could act as if nothing ever happened between the two of you. 

Like every tale of a relationship gone sour, there were two sides. From your side of things Angel did not treat you well. He would screw you over time and time again and it all became too much. You did not believe he meant to, he was just unhappy in your relationship and life that he took it out on you. Still it hurt and with each nasty word he said.

Angel believed he was a fuck up, he always had and somehow along the way that blame got put on you. When things didn't go well on a run it was because you were distracting him. If he had a rough day at work it was because you kept him up all night with your working late. If he was unhappy it was because he would come home to a messy house, the least you could do was clean it wasn’t like you had as stressful a job as him. These were just some of the many things that were put on you. The shitty thing is for a while you believed him, you believed that all his problems were your fault and you were to blame until one day you decided you had enough. It wasn't your fault.

The day he found out about EZ’s deal with the feds was the day you realized it was time to end things. He had come home drunk off his ass understandably, stumbling into his home.

“What’s going on Angel?” You asked seeing how he was clearly in distress and in the roughest shape you had seen him in. 

“EZ fucking betrayed me. My own flesh and blood, my baby brother.” He slurred plopping down onto the couch taking his boots off. He wasn’t in a good head space to begin with. He shouldn’t have come home. He should have gone anywhere else but he didn’t. He was here, he came here first and now you were going to get the brunt of it. “You know none of this would have happened if it wasn’t for you. If I wasn't so distracted trying to keep you happy. If it wasn’t for your neediness I would have seen the signs. I would have known and would not have been played so effortlessly by my own family!” He spat. All the stress had built up plus the painful betrayal from not only his brother but his father as well brought him to this breaking point. It wasn’t your fault, he knew that. Still it was easier to blame anyone else.

You were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. 

You knew he was in pain but that didn't make his words hurt any less. It was in this moment you knew you had to get out of the toxic relationship. It was what was best for the both of you.

You let him sleep it off taking care of him throughout the night before you ended things the next morning. It wasn’t pretty but you had finally come to the decision together that you just weren’t good together anymore. You had drifted apart that was all. 

You never told him how badly he had hurt you. 

He never realized how badly he had hurt you. 

And now you were just somebody that he used to know.

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