#God why am I theorizing about this movie I’m not even that interested?
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Given that D-16 seems to already have the Decepticon logo in every scene we see him in I think it’s likely that he has it right from the start. And that “the heck is that mark on your arm?” is going to be a driving question in the movie. Especially given he seems surprised to find something that looks like the mark.
#Transformers#Maccadam#TF1#Working theory is that he was created either by the proto-Decepticon faction#as a weapon of some sort#Or that he’s a failed Quintesson experiment they tossed#Either way I think he’ll turn out to not be a “normal” Cybertronian#In this continuity#Not sure how I would feel about that if it turns out to be true :\#But then I am garbage at predicting things so who fuckin’ knows?#God why am I theorizing about this movie I’m not even that interested?#Also kinda funny since I think the logo was originally meant to look like Soundwave?
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Deleted lines of dialogue in Frozen 2
We know that F2’s plot suffered from last minute changes and even leaks that we got before the release contradict the final material, but that’s another can of worms for another post. What I wanna talk about in this post is something I happened to notice a few days ago while watching the Frozen 2 Outtakes video available with the Blu-ray version of the movie. Here’s a link to it. My apologies if there’s a post out there already talking about this, but I haven’t seen one so I thought I might as well give it a go.
Basically, the video is a recollection of funny moments that arose when the voice actors were recording their lines. But… I don’t know if this was deliberate or an oversight on Disney’s part, or if they didn’t care too much about it at the end of the day and released it anyways. The thing is, we can see the original dialogue they were supposed to record as tiny subtitles, and good god, there are tons of deleted lines, including an earlier version of Some Things Never Change, and some point to the existence of completely different scenes from the ones we got. Here’s what I mean:
I don’t recall ever coming across deleted lines for Frozen 1 apart from the famous “That’s no blizzard, that’s my sister”, so this is pretty interesting.
But in addition to that, while digging through some old files I found recorded lines of a Frozen 2 book that came out before release (Specifically on October 4th, 2019, when the Frozen Fan Fest was being held with the first released merch). That’s a long, long time ago and I don’t remember the name of the book, sadly, but you can listen to the recording I made right here. If someone does remember the name of the book that’d be really cool. I think the original recording was provided by Snow on the Arendelle Kingdom Discord server, so credits to her.
UPDATE: The book was found along with other interesting pieces of info! It’s called Frozen 2 Read-Along Storybook and CD. Credits to @lovewillthaw-j and their amazing detective work! Here it is.
What’s particularly interesting about this one is that no merch released on October 4 had the ending of the movie. Every book was cut off at the moment Anna received Elsa’s message in the cave, with no mention of Show Yourself or Elsa’s death for that matter. Now, we don’t know if they were trying not to spoil the movie, or if they legitimately didn’t have a final ending at the time the books were made. Knowing how… messy Frozen 2’s development was, I think we can all sort of agree it was the latter.
Because of this, there is some really intriguing stuff. Nods to scenes that aren’t in the final movie, shameless hints to Elsa’s permanent death, events happening in a different order… I don’t know if these lines were recorded only for the book, but I doubt they were, because many of those lines are actually in the movie or are referenced in books and some have really slight modifications like changes in tone of voice. I guess we’ll never Find The Truth™, but we can analyze these lines too because they can give us an idea of what earlier versions of the movie were like.
So let’s look at them one by one. Looooong post ahead.
Frozen 2 Outtakes Video
“Should have left it to me. Love you too. You blew it Kristoff. Oh. I’m alone. It’s fine.” ��� Kristoff/Sven
This one definitely happens during Kristoff’s first proposal attempt. Before this line, Anna says, “She couldn’t act out ice?” and we can assume Kristoff absent mindedly responds with “Should have left it to me”. That makes sense, considering he delivers ice for a living and ice is his life. Then we got “Love you too”, which Kristoff says in the final movie, but then we got Sven dialogue as he tells him “You blew it, Kristoff.” “Oh, I’m alone,” is what would go before he finally says, “It’s fine.” The reason the dialogue is all mixed up is because Johnathan Groff is the one recording the lines and he does both Kristoff and Sven’s voices (well, technically, Kristoff).
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“Hey. What the—What is this? Hang onto me. What’s happening? Run. The mist is rising. We are being pushed by the…” – Kristoff
We can tell this happens when the Arendellian gang was crossing the mist wall for the first time. The scene was evidently going to be longer and more chaotic than what we actually got. Apparently they run and that would’ve been pretty cool.
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“The winds are restless. Like how I sometimes feel in the fall. But I’m not ready. I love these days, I’m grateful for them all.” – Elsa (Alternate Some Things Never Change)
Now this is what I call a quality deleted line. I recommend you guys watch the video to hear the little part that Idina sings to have an idea what Elsa’s part in Some Things Never Change was originally going to be like. Definitely a bit sadder than what we got. I think this line gives the idea that Elsa wasn’t feeling too comfy in Arendelle even though she enjoyed the company of her family immensely, or if we go with the idea that fall represents change, Elsa is feeling restless in the face of change. She’s not ready to ‘change’ and wants to keep enjoying her days in Arendelle. She can’t let them go. How ironic. Interpret it as you want!
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“I’d freeze this moment if I could find a way…” – Elsa (Alternate Some Things Never Change)
Same scene. Sadder atmosphere for her part of the song. It’s a shame we don’t know what goes next.
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“Water drowns with a stallion’s might.” – Elsa
Wowowowowow. Now this is interesting, because I have no idea where to place this line of dialogue meaning there might’ve been another scene foreshadowing the Nokk. In the final movie, the only moment we see the Nokk is during When I Am Older and it was very brief and played for laughs. But this line gives the idea that the existence of an angry murderous water horse was going to be mentioned earlier on. Now I have a lot of ideas as to what she might’ve referred to (maybe that’s just a comparison she made on the fly and didn’t know the water spirit was a horse? Maybe it’s like a riddle she solved to know what the water spirit was?) but to be honest I think there’s no way to know. Fun to theorize, though.
Also, total confirmation the Nokk is a male!
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“It’s magic. It’s amazing. There’s a voice. I need to follow it.” – Elsa
This line probably happened when they visited Pabbie and evacuated Arendelle. A different take on how she explained to Anna why she wanted to go on the journey. Honestly, I prefer what we actually got. She sounds quite desperate and hypnotized in this one. VOICE. I HEAR. MUST FOLLOW. I don’t know what you guys think. The actual explanation in the final movie is not great either but I prefer it.
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“Hey Elsa. It’s your mom. Remember, mothers are always right. Now, be who you are!” – Olaf (Longer Post Credits Scene)
We were robbed. This line and another one points to a longer post credits scene. I suspect they weren’t able to include it because of time constraints, because c’mon, this is hilarious. An animator on Instagram said that they were not able to model the inside of Elsa’s ice palace for the post credits scene because they ran out of time, so they used Ahtohallan pillars and changed the lighting so that it gave the ‘feel’ of the ice palace. I’m sorry I can’t provide a link right now because I don’t remember who the animator was, but if I find it again or someone else does I’ll update this.
UPDATE: The Instagram comment in particular was found! Thanks to @super-mam-te-moc for the screenshot.
Okay, kind of got derailed there. They didn’t have enough time to finish the post credits scene and that’s the only coherent answer I can find as to why this was deleted.
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“They’re all looking at us, aren’t they? Okay, got any advice? How do I free the forest?” – Elsa
Very similar to what’s in the movie but here Elsa asks Bruni if he knows how she can free the forest. The fact that Elsa asks a little cute salamander this… kind of gives the idea that Elsa was completely clueless, same as the rest of the gang, and the rest of the writers. Jkjk!
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“Emotional and slightly haunting memory of Mother? Is that you?” – Olaf (Longer Post Credits Scene)
Same as above. We were robbed. Twice.
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Unused Recorded Lines from Frozen 2 Book
“Teeth? Oh. Pillow fort! Disturbed! Aw, c’mon, you definitely look disturbed!” – Anna
Shorter or summarized charades scene. Anna never mentions a pillow fort in the final movie.
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“I know that rumble.” – Kristoff
This probably goes when Pabbie and the trolls appeared at the evacuation place. Seems like in an earlier version, there was more buildup before the appearance of the trolls. Kristoff hears the rumble of the rocks before anything else. Deleted scenes seen in trailers also point to a slightly different ‘troll appearance’ scene.
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“I won’t leave her side.” – Anna
During Pabbie’s visit. We know thanks to trailers Anna’s little talk with Pabbie changed a bit. Here Anna displays her worry for Elsa even more.
Here’s a comparison between the trailer:
And the final movie:
What’s particularly interesting about this is that a later point in the movie, during Kristoff’s third failed proposal, Anna suddenly remembers Elsa and runs off hurriedly saying, “I swore I wouldn’t leave her side”. Coincidence? I THINK NOT. She never explicitly says so in the final movie, but it seems like she did in an earlier version.
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“We’ll fix it together. / Together. / Together.” – Anna, Kristoff and Olaf respectively
Probably as they were going to go on the journey, considering the lines are said chronologically? They discovered the power of teamwork. Weird Elsa doesn’t say ‘together’. Maybe they left it out because, coughcoughtheydidn’tfixanythingtogether.
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“Uhm, I sense no way in, but this is fun nonetheless.” – Olaf
Definitely during the arrival at the mist wall. Olaf doesn’t say anything as he bounces off in the final movie.
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“Hah! It let us in, but it clearly does not wanna let us out.” – Olaf
Same as above. Anna is the one who says they’re trapped in the final version.
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“Your father was… / King Agnarr of Arendelle.” – Mattias, Elsa, respectively
In the final version Mattias immediately says “Agnarr”, while here Elsa finishes his words after his pause. To be honest, it makes more sense in the final version, considering Mattias would remember Agnarr’s name without a doubt.
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“I’m fine. I just… actually, I’m starving.” – Anna
This probably goes right after the “Don’t Run Into Fire” argument. I didn’t think much of this line at first but it’s actually really interesting, because in the final movie, right after Elsa and Anna’s argument, Elsa places Iduna’s scarf on Anna’s shoulders and with this perfect timing they find out she was Northuldra, leading to the whole “Vuelie” scene. But here, there’s no comforting with scarf, and it seems like this scene leads to the one after Vuelie in the final movie, with Anna eating as she talks to Mattias, and Elsa and Honeymaren talking about the spirits.
Which means… that in an earlier version, the discovery of Iduna being Northuldra was probably going to happen later on. Pretty crazy, right?
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“If I lost her… I think I’d lose myself.” – Anna
All right. I think that this line is one of the most important ones. Thanks to books having this line in them we can pinpoint exactly when Anna utters it: expectedly, when she was talking with Mattias. The delivery of this line is also particularly heartbreaking, so I recommend you guys hear the audio file.
I don’t wanna ramble too much but there’s a lot to be said about this line. But yes, I’ll actually end up rambling. Warning.
Along with “I won’t leave her side”, it seems like earlier versions of the movie showed Anna being even more anxious and worried about Elsa’s wellbeing. As we know, Anna and Mattias were talking about ‘doing the next right thing’, and being prepared when life throws you down a new path. This is obvious foreshadowing to The Next Right Thing. But why were these two cut? Don’t they deepen Anna’s character and show just how deathly scared this whole adventure had her?
Well, here’s some speculation. These two lines are obviously foreshadowing Elsa’s death. The thing is, there exists the likelihood that at the times these lines were written and recorded, there was no such thing as Elsa’s revival. We’ve known for a long time that Elsa was going to die for real in Frozen 2, but test audiences were left traumatized and probably in need of PTSD treatment, hating it so much that the ending and everything that came with it was rewritten around June. Including, I speculate, these two lines which blatantly foreshadow Elsa’s big oof.
There’s not much foreshadowing to Elsa’s death in the final version. That’s because it was a minor thing. She died before the climax of the movie and her death scene didn’t feel final nor dramatic enough to fool the audience and make them believe she was really, really, won’t-breathe-ever-again kind of dead. Some watchers didn’t even realize she died, because the scene was not supposed to feel like her end. Not even the score, Ghosts of Arendelle Past, has a final feeling to it. It just kind of ends there in an ominous tone and they stress the fact that she sent an important ice message before freezing, giving hope of events resolving themselves.
But these two lines do foreshadow of a terrifying event. One that’s not minor nor temporary. These two lines, probably among others we’ll never find out about, and Anna’s worried sick attitude in earlier versions, give more weight to Elsa’s death, Elsa’s permanent death, and ultimately, The Next Right Thing.
Or maybe not and I’m wrong and there was no need for a 4 paragraph long overanalysis of two lines. Maybe they just deleted them just cause. Who knows the ways of writers…
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“All this time… the four spirits. Right there.” – Elsa
Maybe this goes during Honeymaren’s talk about the spirits? Right there, meaning, they were all along depicted in Iduna’s scarf and nobody in Arendelle realized? We’ll never know.
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“You mean like a voice?” – Elsa
Probably happened when Honeymaren was talking about the fifth spirit crying out the day the forest fell.
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“She made it across the sea.” – Anna
“I know why the spirits evacuated Arendelle.” – Anna
“Olaf, I know how to free the forest.” – Anna
Okay, I’m gonna talk about these three at the same time because it’s the same scene. Obviously, these lines of dialogue take place in the cave as Anna receives Elsa’s message, right before The Next Right Thing. We know that for sure because The Next Right Thing was one of the first Frozen 2 songs to be written and the writers knew that’s where they wanted the story to go. This seems like a pretty different setup, but to be honest, it feels like a placeholder. Anna doesn’t even react to the fact that there was a statue of grandpa slicing an innocent man in two right in front of her which just feels weird.
And all in all, the lines just don’t have the sadness of the final version. Anna doesn’t sound nearly as disappointed and her voice doesn’t lower that much. She sort of sounds determined in the last line! So determined to wreck her home to pieces with a gigantic flood… ahaha Anna…
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Okay, it was pretty fun to overanalyze all 23 deleted lines that I managed to find. There are even more deleted goodies out there thanks to the merch, but we’re gonna leave that for another moment.
There’s no doubt that Frozen 2′s development had plenty of problems along the way and I think it’s pretty interesting to learn what it could’ve been and could’ve had. These lines are just the tip of the iceberg and I’m more than interested to know what exactly the test audiences saw in those infamous test screenings...
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UPDATE: More deleted stuff!
@theupsidedownpyramid collected more deleted lines found in the trailers right here!
@yumeka36 made a really interesting analysis of the Frozen 2 Novelization with even more deleted lines and scenes here!
#frozen 2#frozen#elsa#anna#kristoff#olaf#sven#frozen 2 deleted scenes#frozen 2 deleted dialogue#frozen 2 outtakes
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I started rambling about my experience with kh and then it turned into khux and then it just turned into me rambling about Ryou and my art journey????? enjoy I guess,
it’s very long but there’s art in there :)
It’s funny to think about my kh journey as a whole tbh, I grew up watching my mom play video games, which included kh1 and 2. I wasn’t allowed to play the playstation2 we owned BUT I did have a gameboy so the first game I played was CoM (after my mom finished it ofc,) so I guess you could say I’ve always been passionate about kh “””side games””” lmao but I did fall off of kh very quickly bc again, I wasn’t allowed to play our PS2 and also I Am A Terrible Gamer I’ve Never Finished CoM I’m sorry you all had to find out like this, but then 358/2 came out when I was in middle school and!!! I didn’t care and I didn’t play idk why lol
Anyway, fast forward to high school I’m like 15 and my older sister, who HAS been keeping up with kh, has a wallpaper on her phone of roxas and ventus. And bc I haven’t kept up I say “nice roxas wallpaper” and she says “thanks but it’s roxas and ventus” and I proceeded to get so mad that I was determined to prove to her that her wallpaper was just roxas twice and then I fell down the BBS rabbit hole and suddenly I was reading about vanitas and then I’m reading the fan translations of the BBS novel and I’m crying??? I am sobbing???? and that’s how I actually got into kh for real lol we are vanitas stans before we are people,
It’s so funny how I thought I was some kh super fan, knowing all this stuff that I spent so long reading and rewatching cutscene movies, but I never once, SOMEHOW NEVER ever came across khx. It’s so absurd and bizarre I seriously have no idea how I never once encountered khx prior to khux. I suppose that has to do with the fact I wasn’t involved in the fandom? In early high school I had stepped away from fandoms as a whole and I didn’t have any interest in really posting content or interacting with fans anymore bc of how burnt out I was from a previous fandom,
but khux released! and I was so hype and excited for it! on launch day I was a senior in high school, I had ran around to every “nerd” and weeb I could find in school to ask them to join my party and fun fact about me is I have crippling social anxiety I literally refuse to start conversations irl so holy shit I was OUT HERE doing the MOST
My player just originally had my name (Matt) but everyone in my party had fun names so Ryou was born! High school was one big yugioh phase for me and ryou bakura is one of my favorite characters ever so it was just the logical name choice lol I quickly started creating Ryou, the character, as well. I was also leaving my homestuck phase and that + vanitas obsession made This character design (art circa 2016)
If y’all are familiar with my kh oc’s you might notice that keyblade now belongs to my kid Monty LOL
Anyway that got scrapped quickly for the chip and dale outfit (which is where Ryou’s trademark goggles are from <3) Goggles have been a staple of my character designs for a LONG TIME so like, it had to be done, (that’s a separate ramble about a separate oc tho)
OG Ryou was an interesting guy; he was a young party leader with this overwhelming responsibility on his shoulders bc of his status as a party leader. In his original story, he also struggled heavily with darkness, much like Terra but for Ryou it was more that the darkness was controlling him and not like a source of power like it was for Terra
A big part of early Ryou I kept, however, was the crushing awareness of loss. One of my party members (the strongest one at the time,) had left without saying a word and I was very confused and hurt. This was around the time the ephemera plot was happening so I decided to incorporate it into Ryou’s story; having him experience losing a friend to darkness since it’s so normal for wielders in Daybreak Town to just disappear, and this would unintentionally become a theme for both me and Ryou as khux friends would just randomly disappear.
I was desperate for khux at this point and I decided to watch the fan translations for khx and GOD, god, was I obsessed. I couldn’t stop thinking about the foretellers. And I’m not going off about that here bc I already did that, but I actually started entering fandom again! I did it slowly, I started on tumblr before this blog was made altho it was me sending anons to the few khux related blogs I could have lol a friend convinced me to get twitter where I got involved with the ffxv fandom, which led me to the kh fandom and eventually the khux fandom there which is what REALLY got me going on khux.
I joined discord servers, most of the servers I’m in are khux related, and from there I joined the khux oc rp (shout out to anyone there who might be reading this lol here’s some art from the beginning of the rp,)
It’s SO FUNNY how the RP influenced me so heavily. I hadn’t RP’d in YEARS, I used to have a strict no oc rp policy, but here I was? And the funny part is, I had barely developed Ryou. I had scrapped his original story and all I had was POST WAR Ryou so I literally had to reverse write him; I had only ever written him as a depressed, guilt ridden adult, but it was a fucking blast and I have such fond memories of this rp when it was active,
But anyway, this encouraged me to get more serious about art! I started drawing, writing, cosplaying, and roleplaying when I hadn’t done any of that stuff in a very long time. The first time I ever drew a background was for a deviant art khux competition actually LOL
also! I always think extremely fondly of the drawing I did of Aced in the keyblade war. It was also one of the first backgrounds I ever drew and it felt like my real starting point in the khux fandom. It got a ton of notes on here and someone wrote a tiny fic in a reblog which just made me SO HAPPY like it really felt like people were noticing me :) I was going to draw a matching Ira but!! I just never did!! One day tho, it’s on my art bucket list to redraw this along with Ira,
Aside from my personal growth, khux was great for my social life ngl, I made SO MANY friends online and got to meet a ton of people irl over the years! It’s crazy to think about all the people I now know and talk to? It honestly makes me really emotional. I’ll never forget taking the train into NYC and meeting up with discord friends. Going to conventions and talking with people about the latest khux update? Absolutely insane and those were some GOOD TIMES, if I thanked every khux friend or even just person who made an impact on me then we’d be here for a LONG TIME,
Fun fact, for my Lauriam cosplay all I needed to buy was the wig I just owned his outfit LOL also? Probably retiring that cosplay ngl people treated me like absolute garbage when I wore him and it led to a lot of confidence issues for awhile ngl. That’s probably one of the only memorable negative experiences I have with khux; it was great when khux people recognized me but for kh fans that weren’t in khux? They were FUCKING MEAN??? fuck kh fandom at large, I only care about khux fandom,
This leads me to another huge part of my experience in khux fandom: THEORIES!! I used to write SO MANY and oh my god my brain was so full all the time. It was a huge appeal for me in the fandom; I had been previously writing theory posts in the RWBY fandom and it just migrated over to khux for me lol I had done a ton of theorizing around Lauriam tbh, it was really the only reason I liked his character at all bc initially I did not care about the dandelions, anyone who wasn’t Skuld I was like “please leave Now thanks”
A funny part of khux fandom I never intended to be apart of is the MEMES, I really only started doing memes as stress relief bc college had me so busy all I had time/energy for was these quick little shit post drawings.
The first meme I made, file name “invi despair” LOL we need to get her a girlfriend smh anyway, I think in my senior year of college I did a bunch of rapid fire memes all in one month bc the stress of finals was getting so bad afdgfhdgf as far as I know my impact on this fandom will be my memes bc all I do now is enter a kh/khux server and introduce myself and I go “yeah I draw art. here’s a meme” and everyone goes OH YOU, honestly I am nothing if not a clown
I’ve talked so much idk where I’m going with this. Khux is just a good game even if the gameplay actually kind of really sucks yknow lol but it was the first game I played where I like, REALLY got into the meta and the mechanics. I used to read so much on the mechanics and watch youtube videos on which medals were worth pulling for. I was never a whale or a top player exactly, but I could rank well if I tried lol I’ve made it to the top 100 for solo rankings, my party has made it to top 10, and in pvp I’ve made top 300. I’m not the highest level in my party but FUCK do I know how to manipulate this game LOL
And with all that hard work, the strategies, the theorizing, the content I’ve made-- it’s been my life for 5 years. I’ve logged into khux almost every single day. At the end, I have logged 1820 days in khux out of 1910 days. Kinda crazy. Crazier I’ve never spent money on khux either lol the only “money” gone into it was one time my mom gave me a google play store gift card and I used it on my birthday for a VIP xemnas medal which eventually made it to regular pulls anyway but it was nice and a little treat :)
I’m not a gacha fan, I don’t care for it, so I don’t think I’ll be touching another gacha again. But for kh? This was pretty fucking awesome, even if it sucked a lot sometimes LOL It was worth it for the people I’ve met most of all I think. I would honestly be a completely different person without khux and that’s REALLY insane to think about.
#the khux hyperfixation is REAL#but yall knew this about me#there's so much more I could say but it's 2am and this is long enough already#im rambling
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So Doctor Who’s Back!
I know that no one follows me to read the stuff I post, mainly because it’s never really interesting, and I post at like... midnight and shit, BUT I just watched the Series 13 premier of Doctor Who and I have things i wanna say but can’t say to my partner because I want her to watch it first so here we go!
Also this is all 100% my opinion.
Spoilers galore if you click Read More!
First off, while it was not perfect, I enjoyed it A LOT! Like, way more than I expected to. By the end of series 12 I was incredibly bored and ambivalent and that really bummed me out, but after this episode??? My mind was racing and I wanted to know more and I am genuinely intrigued.
Two of the biggest things that got me excited were my reactions to the Doctor and Yaz and their relationship. I FINALLY feel like Yaz is a character! She has agency and she’s talking back to the Doctor and there’s a conflict between them! Yaz is frustrated because she cares but the Doctor won’t let her in! And I finally get the angle they’re playing with 13!!! She’s more cut off and secretive than any of the other Doctors in New Who! I love that!! The way she avoids everything and keeps everything to herself because she thinks she can take care of it but it just leads to shit going even worse!!!!!! In one episode I felt like Yaz and 13 had more character than they did for most of series 11 and 12.
One of the things I disliked about this episode was it felt really messy, BUT, I also feel like I can’t exactly judge it as just a standard series opener, because this isn’t a common series, this is essentially a 6-part movie so this was Act One and basically just a giant Inciting Incident. So yeah, for a normal episode it’s pretty messy, and even for a part one it could be tightened up a bit BUT I wasn’t bored! I was intrigued and questioning things and wondering what was going on and fascinated and I want answers!!!! I CARE!!!!!!
The creepy crystal face dude is really fun, and here’s where i have to eat my words about the Series 12 reveal. I personally didn’t care about the Doctor being “the source of regeneration”, what got to me was I couldn’t figure out why I needed to care. Why should I care that you added a weird bit of backstory to a character? How does that effect the present? But I was focused on the wrong part! I should’ve been focused on the Division and the shit they made the Doctor do and then wiped their mind! Oh what a fool I am.
And then there’s the Flux. I am genuinely curious what the Flux is. I am kinda hoping/theorizing that the Flux is this naturally occurring thing that just occurred way too early (maybe because of the Doctor??) and because 13 is so impulsive and quick draw and do first, think later, she’s actually going to make it worse? We’ll see.
The stuff going on with the TARDIS is probably my favorite thing though???? The doors going in weird spots (god that was so fun) and the leaking and the malfunctions, it all has got me so curious because the TARDIS has NEVER been that wonky and I wanna know why!! Then again, I don’t blame the TARDIS for breaking down when the Doctor is LITERALLY BUSTING OPEN THE CONSOLE WITH A FUCKING MALLET! I’m not even talking about shooting vortex energy into the Flux, I’m talking about before!
I’ll say this, Dan is pretty “fine” to me. Obviously it’s part one so there’s time for him to grow, but so far he’s a pretty average dude who seems very nice. I will say though, the stuff with the Dog People is a neat concept and a fun little twist of, “I’m not the bad guy! I’m trying to help and you’ve been wasting time!” and the fact that the Doctor was coming after Dog Man for stuff about the Division (while Yaz knows NONE OF THIS) is very good.
And it’s crazy how all the cut aways - The Sontarans, Vinder, Claire - all felt so wonky and messy, but I will say, that end bit where it showed all of them and their moments of a kind of “Here we go!” bit actually worked for me. I was really swept up by it and my brain really was going “WHAT IS GONNA HAPPEN????” So kudos to that!
All in all, I really liked it. I had more nitpicks like using the sonic too much, the fact that it really didn’t need to be set at Halloween or called “The Halloween Apocalypse”, and that whole beginning escape felt very fan film, but also it kinda set the chaotic energy that 13 and Yaz really give off? Honestly this episode really made me wish (even more) that this series was just Yaz and 13, but I’m sure Dan will grow on me, and so far it seems like Yaz will be an interesting character to use as a “I’ve been here a bit, lemme tell you what’s what” kind of character.
I really hope that this is a sign of what’s to come and that Chibnall has finally found how to make Doctor Who work for him and that this will be a banger of a series.
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I, lying awake in bed because that’s how it always is the day before you have something important to do... am going to try to guess what the plot of Bioshock Infinite is, based on what I’ve seen in the first few hours and with knowledge of the other two (and a half?) games. Spoilers for the entire Bioshock series, except maybe Infinite, but I intend to knock it out of the park.
So. The first Bioshock is set in a futuristic (by 1950’s standards) city at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean, created by a hardcore libertarian named Andrew Ryan as a way to once and for all live in a society free of government regulation. I won’t get into all the “sea slugs that produce a gene-altering wonder drug” and “child slaves brainwashed to drink corpse blood” stuff; very interesting, very important to the plot, but if I tried to explain the world of Bioshock I’d be lying here typing on my phone until the sun comes up. That stuff aside, the major plot points are that you’re not actually a guy who just happened to crash-land near the entrance to the city but are, in fact, Andrew Ryan’s son, and the guy who’s been guiding you through the city was actually using a Manchurian Candidate-style activation phrase to manipulate you into doing whatever he wanted. It’s a big, mind-blowing reveal (as is the realization that your character is actually about four years old... science fiction, man).
Bioshock 2 didn’t really have any big plot twists... or plot, for that matter ...but it was developed by an entirely different team, while the original’s team also did Infinite, so I’m expecting a return to form. Just as an aside, Bioshock 2 had a short DLC campaign called Minerva’s Den, which had a fantastic story, and a twist that the player can figure out on their own if they’re paying attention. Your goal is to get a very smart computer (for 1968) out of the underwater city and back to the surface so you can use it to cure all the victims of the slug-borne gene manipulation, and you’re guided over radio by the computer’s creator. At the end, you learn that the one guiding you was actually the computer itself, and that you’re its creator, slowly recovering from brainwashing. For the record, the endings to all three of these have made me cry.
So! With those kinds of twists in mind, what am I expecting from Bioshock Infinite? Well, I went into the game only knowing the names of the protagonists, that rather than underwater it was set in a floating sky city, and that there was some kind of religious theming but also a lot of old-timey Americana. As it turns out, the people of this city worship— no, have DEIFIED the founding fathers, and are lead by a man called Father Comstock. I’m pretty sure that name is a reference to the Comstock Act, similar to Andrew Ryan being named after Ayn Rand... but he could actually be called Father Cornstalk and I just haven’t been paying attention.
Anyway. Just a few minutes into the game, I noticed that a statue of Comstock looked suspiciously similar to my character... before deciding that I didn’t actually have that clear of a mental image of my character, they wouldn’t pull the “secret son” thing twice, and as much as I love it there probably isn’t going to be any time travel. Le sigh.
UNTIL!
So, your goal is to get a girl named Elizabeth out of the city, and there is some legitimately weird stuff going on with her prison. Like, they have some of her personal possessions from various points in her life in containment: a teddy bear, a diary, and a bloody cloth labeled “menarche”. Gross. Why would you keep that. Well, when an electric current (or something visually similar) is applied, the bear and diary change color, and the blood disappears from the cloth. The reason I’m not sure if it’s electricity is that there’s some kind of siphon system set up, it looks like a bunch of subwoofers, and it’s absorbing... something? When she sings, maybe? Is the energy being siphoned what changed the quantum states of those objects, or whatever was happening? There was also a chart showing that when she hit puberty... something, really spiked, which is what forced them to build the siphon. I can’t claim to know what’s happening here, but when I finally saw her she was day dreaming about Paris, and.. I guess opened some kind of portal, TO Paris? But then a bus or something barreled towards her, so she quickly closed it. In the couple seconds that the portal was open, I saw the marquee on a movie theater that... well, was in French, but I’M PRETTY SURE said “Return of the Jedi”. I should probably mention that this game is set in 1912. That smells like time travel to me, baby!
So, this is where it gets interesting, and confusing, and complicated. I think Elizabeth is Comstock’s daughter, from various signs and posters about Comstock’s seed being their salvation, and The Lamb of God being locked in the tower, and such... and signs about a “false shepherd” who would try to take her away (again, lots of weird divergent Christian sect stuff). One sign showered the false shepherd’s hand as having the initials AD branded on the back, which the protagonist Booker does indeed have. Before rescuing Elizabeth, Comstock confronts you, and seems to know all about Booker’s past, including his wife Anna (who died in childbirth), and claims to know his future as well. Being a prophet and such. Thing is, the way it’s presented, that whole thing could’ve all been in Booker’s head...? Shortly after rescuing Elizabeth, you run into someone who mistakes her for someone named Annabelle. Hmm HMMM. I’ve also run into a diary by someone named Rosalind Lutece (I think she’s one of the creepy twins who keep popping up everywhere) talking about physics and what sounded like the concept of quantum superpositioning, as well as a little informational kiosk in which she claims quantum mechanics are what enable the city to float. There were also a couple diaries that seemed to imply Elizabeth came from... somewhere else, and a part of her might still be there, or something?
SO. Finally, we get to the part where I theorize on what’s going on. In short... iunno.
Okay, well, I feel like my idea should be obvious by now. I think Comstock might be a future, or ALTERNATE REALITY FUTURE, version of Booker, and Elizabeth is... either a past version of his wife, before she went back in time and married him, or an alternate-reality version of his daughter? But then who is the Annabelle that the girl thought Elizabeth was? Did Booker’s child not die along with his wife, and was secretly wisked away to skytown? Comstock’s wife is consistently referred to as Lady Comstock, but what if her name is Annabelle too? Maybe it’s the same concept as the Heinlein story By His Bootstraps, with the protagonist only realizing that he IS now the old man from the beginning, and has to get his younger self into this weird time loop in order to live the life he’s lead?
I might be going a little off the rails; I mean, I’m pretty sure that the statue of Comstock I saw earlier actually reminded me of Handsome Jack, a character from another game I haven’t played who happens to wear an outfit similar to Booker’s. That said, there’s DEFINITELY some kind of time travel or dimension-hopping shenanigans going on here. There are good writers on this game, and I refuse to believe the Annabelle/Anna thing is a Batman v Superman-level coincidence.
The weird part is that in the tower where they were keeping Elizabeth, they have documentation of her dating back to one year old, so she was clearly exhibiting... something, unusual, even as a baby. The game also has yet to explain Vigors, its versions of the Plasmids from the first two Bioshock games, which were basically superpowers granted by the substance produced by those sea slugs. If I had to guess, Vigors are... a result of some kind of quantum something-or-other, which they made from whatever it is they were siphoning off of Elizabeth? Maybe it’s a Scarlet Witch kind of thing... you don’t actually change yourself, you just find yourself in an alternate reality where everything else is 100% the same, except you’re a version of yourself who can shoot crows out of your hands.
Right, so. My... official theory is... that... I have no idea what’s going on. Yeah, sorry, something in that mess up there is bound to be close, but when you get into time travel and/or dimension-hopping, all bets are off the table. Or all bets, a literally infinite number of bets, are on the table. Which is a lot to try to comprehend.
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Is Dylan really Kieran? A Theory Dissection:
So I’ve taken the time to process everything that’s happened in the amazing season finale of Purple Hyacinth because I didn’t want to rush into posting about it and I really wanted to let my thoughts about it simmer for a bit. I also decided to reread the entire season over the course of a couple days to get the best idea of how it worked as a whole. Once again if you haven’t read this yet please do yourself a favour and check it out it’s really phenomenal.
I’ll probably make a few posts about PH over the next couple weeks as we wait for season 2. However I won’t post an analysis of the finale mainly because Lanxyuu already did an amazing job of that already. Check it out if you’ve got the time, it’s 10000 words of pure analytical gold. Writing about any of that would be redundant. That being said the first thing I’m gonna talk about is the whole ‘Is Kieran actually Dylan’ theory that’s the new hot thing in the fandom, mainly because I’ve received a lot of requests to discuss it and also because I feel like I can add my own points to the debate.
So let’s just get it out of the way: do I think Kieran is Dylan? As of right now the answer is no. I just don’t think we have enough evidence to prove it, and what’s there is more circumstantial. That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy theorizing about it. I’ve found that discussing and sharing theories and ideas is one of my favourite ways to interact with a fandom. So I’m gonna put all of the evidence that I’ve observed in the entire first season both in favour of and against this theory and show why I think we can’t say that Kieran is Dylan. I’m not telling you to not believe it. Believe what you want! Like I said it’s fun to do this. I’ve just been specifically asked my opinion and I want to be able to justify it through what I’ve seen in the comic itself.
For more of my posts about Purple Hyacinth check out my ‘ph posts’ tag!
So with all of that out of the way, let’s get started!
Evidence in favour of Kieran being Dylan:
One of the things I think most of us can agree on is that Dylan probably isn’t really dead. In general if I’m not shown a body, I don’t believe they’re dead. I’ve seen far too many movies and TV shows and have read far too many novels to be fooled by that. As of right now, in my head, Dylan is alive, or at least wasn’t killed in the bombing. So obviously if he isn’t dead then that frees him up to show up in the plot at some point or maybe he was there all along...?
This kind of ties into my next point: what happened to him then? His hat was found at the scene, so he must have lost it at some point before the explosion. This is all speculative, but he could have been snatched up by Tim and the driver in Lauren’s parents car. We heard Tim mention that children were in the car so it’s somewhat plausible that Dylan could have been kidnapped. Maybe he saw something suspicious and snooped around a bit which lead to him being snatched up or something. From there he’s tortured and broken and made into an assassin for the PS. Only he isn’t broken. He steels his resolve and does as he’s told because he’s now set on biding his time and getting revenge on those who robbed him of his life and humanity. It makes for a pretty compelling character arc.
The tragedy of his character arc could also be supplemented by the fact that when he was young, he wanted to be a doctor and save lives, but they made him into an assassin who takes lives. Brutally. Violently. Painfully. All of this would emphasize why he views himself as such a monster. The person he is now goes against everything the person he once was values. It’s this dichotomy that reinforces his ‘monster’ persona and allows him to justify this view of himself.
Another point is that this could explain why Kieran hesitated when he could have killed Lauren way back in episode 3. Of course he would hesitate to kill someone who was his close friend. Most of his murders were of people he either didn’t know or didn’t know very well. If he’d had a close friendship with her in childhood, it would obviously make him stop for a moment when he realizes who she is, just like he does in that episode. We even see Lauren say that if she knew why he hesitated then ‘everything would be different’. Obviously if she found out that he was her-long-lost-thought-to-be-dead friend, the person who symbolized her guilt for not stopping the bombing, the plot would be waaaaaay different. Just like the line about being the most blind of all in the prologue, the implications of this line are going to play a major role in the story, and this theory could explain that.
Then there’s those god damned purple hyacinths. Obviously Dylan’s knowledge of these flowers, both in their cultivation and meaning, are things that Kieran must know too. We pretty much know that they’re his signature for both their royal symbolism and their use in mourning, and that Kieran must have a stash of them growing somewhere. There’s also the fact that Lauren, who we know is very intelligent and well educated even at 12, doesn’t know the meaning of purple hyacinths other than their use as a symbol by the royal family. This tells me that their symbolism outshines their meaning in the traditional sense within the pop culture. Honestly, I didn’t even know the meanings of most flowers except for roses until I started reading this Webtoon. I’m not saying that people don’t know the meaning at all, I’m just saying it may not be common knowledge.
The final point I wanna talk about in favour of this theory is their appearances, since that will bleed nicely into the points against it for obvious reasons. So many people, myself included, have noticed that if you switch Dylan’s hair and eye colouring for Kieran’s, he’d basically look like little Kieran, and yes, I see it too. You could say that he could be dying his hair, it’s not crazy to believe hair dye exists in this world. How else does Belladonna have pink hair if they didn’t have access to dye? Unless it’s just stains from the blood of her victims… Actually that could be a theory lol but that’s not the point. Point is Kieran could theoretically have his hair dyed black, but it’s a bit of a stretch, as I explain in...
Evidence against Kieran being Dylan:
While he maaaaay be able to change his hair colour from light blond to black, there’s no way for him to change his eye colour from grey to blue. If rectangular glasses don’t even exist in this world yet (thank you Soph for this justification for why you gave him Harry Potter glasses), there’s no way that they’d have access to contact lenses yet. The other argument is that his eye colour changed with age but that feels a bit too... convenient for my taste. Odds are our boy Kieran is sporting the look he was born with. Additionally, with everything going on in his life and his priorities, when would he have the time to constntly maintain this look, and why would he feel the need to disguise himself in the first place? He already operates in the shadows of the night and none of the authorities, other than Lauren, were able to get close enough to describe his appearance. There would simply be no need for all of that extra disguising.
Speaking of his appearance, we’ve seen one of his victims recognize him before he murders them. He says something interesting: ‘You were that boy’. Now this whole thing is one of my favourite mysteries of the series, so you best believe I am jumping on this shit the second we get more info about it. But for now, I want to use it to show that this aristocrat, who were loyal to the crown and presumably hadn’t seen him in years, took one look at Kieran’s face and immediately recognized him from when he was a child. If this man knew he had these same features as a boy, then it’s safe to assume that he’s always looked like this. This also links him to the aristocracy, since there’s no reason why this man of high status in opposition the PS would know anything about him unless he knew him before he entered the PS. Dylan, on the other hand, was the son of a gardener. He was friends with Lauren sure, but he clearly was of a lower station in society than someone like Lauren or the other aristocratic families. It’s doubtful that he’d leave such an impression on this high society man.
On top of all of that, if he were really Dylan and this man really did see through his change in appearance, why wouldn’t Lauren see through it too? She was one of his best friends and thinks about him constantly. If this man was able to recognize him in a single moment but she still doesn’t recognize him after months, then odds are he just isn’t Dylan.
There’s also the fact that Kieran doesn’t lie when he tells Lauren his name. It’s the same name that people like Belladonna know him by and it’s the name he uses when he becomes the archivist in Lauren’s precinct. Like he said before: there’s no need for him to hide his identity. He’s protected by his reputation and the PS itself. I can see an argument where he could have ‘renounced’ his old name because the person he once was is dead and only the monster remains, which is again a cool theory , or you could say it’s to keep people from knowing that he’s actually alive. But there would be no real need for him to change his name. He could have two names just like the hyacinths have two meanings. I will say that this theory about ‘Kieran White’ not being his true name could also work in favour for him not being Dylan too as, if he was an aristocrat, the PS could have changed his name to hide him from his family as well, but that’s neither here nor there, just something to consider. For now we know that he really is Kieran White and there’s no evidence to disprove that (yet).
Finally, many of the points listed in favour of the theory; the motive, the character arc, the knowledge of flowers, it’s all circumstantial. For all we know, Kieran could be Dylan Rosenthal, or he could be some boy connected to the aristocracy or even the royal family. He could be Dylan Rosenthal, or he could be his own character with his own arc yet to be fully revealed who’s connected to Lauren somehow. The meaning of purple hyacinths could come from Dylan’s prior knowledge, or they could common knowledge and Kieran just bought ‘Gardening for Dummies’ or some shit to make sure he didn’t kill them. Any number of different things could really be at play that we simply don’t know yet. But we do know that a man recognized him at a glance while Lauren, Dylan’s best friend, didn’t recognize him whatsoever. We do know that there’s no proof that hair and especially eye colour can be changed in this world. We do know that we still have quite a ways to go in this story and that the answers aren’t what we expect.
Eph and Soph have done an amazing job of revealing the story to us in disjointed pieces so that when we finally get that one piece that fits, may of them fall into place too. How many of us realized it was her parents’ car in the picture before it was revealed in episode 49? Or thought that Harvey was a spy all along? I don’t think we know nearly enough about him to prove he’s Dylan, but what we do have at this moment is enough to disprove it. What we have now is primarily speculation versus hard physical evidence. We need to accept that we don’t have all the pieces to the puzzle yet and that we’ll only receive new ones little by little.
So, until we learn more about Kieran’s past or until we see ‘changing-eye-colour’ join ‘lie-detecting’ as a new supernatural ability, I’m afraid that I can’t fully get behind this theory. Again, this doesn’t mean I’m telling you not to believe it. Thinking about all the implications of Kieran being Dylan is a lot of fun, just like thinking about Kieran’s backstory and motives is fun. And I could be wrong about all of this, who knows? Writing this just got me really excited to see where his arc will lead us and even more excited for season 2!
Thanks again to everyone who wanted me to discuss this! I had a lot of fun writing it and would love to hear feedback from you guys about any thing you may want to contribute that I may not have mentioned. This post was born of a sleepless night into morning and a need to get all my thoughts out of my brain so it could finally turn off and let me sleep. I already have an idea about what I’m gonna write next so stay tuned and thanks again for all the support!!
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Dark Road Impressions and theories
I’m actually really excited for the World Building lore. That and the characterization. So! Let’s start from the beginning.
Opening Scene:
This is pretty straight forward but knowing Xehanort is a ‘Destinate’ is still the coolest thing. He’s lived his life on the same sleepy island going to the same school and playing on the same island as Sora. He ‘lays like a starfish’ and dreams of something greater. That simile is minor but it’s indicative of his islander nature. Another small thing I focus in on is the mention of other surrounding islands. We know the name is plural and we know there’s a ‘main island’ but the one-off line does suggest that there’s some kind of island ecosystem which is comforting for anyone trying to develop a Destiny Islands culture. I would be crazy not to mention the inciting drive of Xehanort’s curiosity. His dreams of the Player and the desire to see his ‘friends from another life’. Well by golly that sounds a lot like reincarnation to me. That’s a very new concept to Kingdom Hearts, but not entirely far off.
We await the fate of our Player in KHux but we can easily assume it’s an unfortunate one. But what would make the heart linger and the thought of reincarnation really does open a can of worms in terms of heart mythos. Though, it would fit rather well. Consider the Final World and the lingering, persisting hearts that land there after death. I’ve theorize that they are bound to the Final World by the hearts left behind as a sort of heart-ghost phenomenon. And then we ask what happens when hearts actually do pass on past that limbo. Hearts are a powerful thing with a lot of meaning. The idea of death concurring the heart is almost laughable, so a form of heart reincarnation would make perfect sense. Perhaps they pass on to form the ‘spark’ that a newborn heart blooms from-- since we know hearts are grown. And memories are deeply inlaid in the construction of a heart so Xehanort being haunted by these memories is very fitting.
Scala Scenes:
So I’m guessing Xehanort lied to everyone about knowing where he came from. They simply know he is from the outside world but the fact that Eraqus floats the idea that he’s from the surrounding city to a negative means that Xehanort never confirmed or denied the theories about him. We know he’s not amnesiac bc the opening scene is a flashback. So he’s playing dumb-- why?-- probably out of curiosity after initial befuddlement. It plays into this very interesting dichotomy he’s got going on. Think, he’s lived his life on this small world, afraid that his dreams were nothing more than that. Xehanort was hungry for something more and suddenly his prayers are answered. When he arrives at Scala-- it turns out that all of his peers are essentially the same as him. All they know is Scala. He’s the mysterious one. He’s their waypoint to a greater reality. It must be a thrilling scenario. It’s got to be fascinating, leaving little room for his own sense of awe. I might be compelled to leave my peers mystified once I gained my bearings. That being said, a couple world building points. The surrounding spires of Scala are abandoned cities. That... is a very strange and questionable thing. It’s clearly important to the history of the world so we have to ask... why?? I’ve thought in the past that maybe they were different parallel versions of Scala but that started to hurt my brain to think of this world as a singularity but perhaps... they are ‘failed cities’? Like erected and abandoned after not working out. Ohh... what if Scala is a singularity. What if, when Brain created Scala as a final escape from the Data Worlds (and Keyblade War), there was only one scenario where he actually succeeded in carrying the Dandelions with him. What if those other cities really are different timeline’s Scala’s left abandon by the failure of those timeline’s Brain. Ohhh it worksssssssssss
Classroom Scene:
Ok when I heard there was a ‘Baldr’ I immediately though ‘oh dear Nomura grace me with that sweet sweet character design. And then story goes There are seven upperclassmen! And then I’m like GIVE ME COOL CHARACTERSSSS Okay but in all serious, I am pleased to hear that there are some grade levels in this here school. I am curious as to why the upperclassmen went missing and even more curious about the mission that Baldr was sent on. The parallels with the stray apprentice are not lost to me, but the explanation of Baldr’s sister being missing is very heart tugging for me. Ever since Lauriam became the first sibling in the KH series, I’ve been fascinated by there being blood relatives in the KH verse, only because lineage and relation has never been relevant before. You all know that familial bonds is a well of untapped potential and I can sense it coming. It’s a rescue plot, which is very interesting. Yes, I wonder why a master would send younger students to go after the older ones but I’m gonna guess that Master’s are strapped. I am also encouraged that they make a distinction that they are in teams vs. going solo. Ehhh we’ll see. I like that they address there being multiple ways of travel and it looks like they are using the Lanes Between. With Keyblade Armorrrrrr. God, this stuff is cool. Everyone’s designs are bitchin and it is interesting that the No Heart design still has the Nobody insignia. Now....Release the keyblade vehicle designs Nomura.
First World Visit:
Okay, this is where things get interesting. They address the conundrum of the Heartless. THANK YOU. But they address it as a mystery. Clearly the Emblem Heartless are like the projections from the BoP which is common knowledge, so we might be learning about that copy floating around. That’s our key to the mystery. But let’s talk about world maturity!!!!!!! That’s what I’m gonna call it, cause it makes a ton of sense. Like really. I’m cackling. Because isn’t it contrived??? Worlds have this sort of newborn state where the set is there but the people aren’t? We know time moves differently but sometimes the clock doesn’t even start until a predetermined moment??? Time isn’t even flowing for the Disney Worlds until... you guessed it! Until Sora and co-visit or brush with it. Which means only ONE thing. They aren’t worlds at all. If they were Worlds, they’d be living out their backstory in some fashion relative to Xehanort, maybe not at the same pace but still to some degree. No, they exist and are frozen until it’s time for the Disney movie to start. The World isn’t a World. It’s a Story. A set narrative. You know I talk about this is my Heart of Stories theory. Cause now we have to ask about the original worlds and what story they are playing. How equal they are to their Disney World Peers. Because they too are stories, which means the entire universe is just a story and Kingdom Hearts is literally the heart of that story. Enter the metaverse.---I’m breathing heavy. Keep the Dark Road content coming.
#kingdom hearts#kingdom hearts dark road#khdr#kingdom hearts speculation#kingdom hearts meta#kingdom hearts analysis
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Survey #366
“you can’t take me from me”
If you’re a girl, have you ever had the urge shave your hair? No. Do you live by a forest? Not anymore. :( How old are your parents? Late 50s. What do you prefer: Small cars, hybrids, trucks or SUVs? Uh, I guess normal ones? Like the ones with four doors and not that horribly low to the ground. What’s the scariest book you’ve ever read? I've never read a book that was scary to me. Do your parents drink? Dad doesn't anymore, and Mom very rarely does, usually just for special occasions. Does downloading music without paying make you feel guilty? Yes, so idk why I still do it. .-. Do you have any pet fish? Nah. What’s your favorite seafood to eat? I only like shrimp. Does your house have air conditioning? Yes. Name the creepiest horror movie character for you: Ghostface, ever since I was a kid. I was horrified of him, and I still think his design is mega creepy. How many college degrees do you want? I wanted to get at most a Bachelor's (I never saw reason to go higher in the fields I was interested in, except for my brief wildlife biologist aspiration), but now I know I'm not getting any degrees. Do you like animals? I love animals. Have you ever written anything longer than 10 pages? Yes. What do you wear to sleep? Pj pants and a tank top. How many keys do you carry with you? One. Have you ever attended a professional sporting event? Yeah. Sometimes Dad and I would go to hockey games together. I don't really care for sports, hockey included, but it was still something we bonded over since I was normally in the living room on the laptop while he was watching it. Which do you value more, intellect or work ethic? Work ethic. Both are important, but I'd rather have a dedicated, worthy employee versus a lazy one that just happens to have brains. Have you ever been covered in mud? Yes, as a kid. Ever been to a cabin on a mountain? No, but omG I fucking wish. Ever lost your voice? Yes. Do you take your time when making an important decision? I take way too much time because I obsess over doing the right thing. Are you a cautious person? Very. Do you chew gum? Sometimes. What makeup product do you never use? A lot, really. Bronzer is literally never, I haven't touched blush in forever, and the same goes for foundation. Have you ever been offered drugs on the street? No. Have you ever seen a jellyfish? Only at aquariums. Do you ever put bread in your soup? UGH, NO. Bread should NOT be soggy. Do you want some soup? No, I don't even really like soup. Is there anything in the USB key slots in your computer/laptop? Yeah, the sensor thing for my wireless mouse. Did anyone ever draw on your face when you were sleeping? I don't believe so; I'd certainly feel it and wake up. Have you ever done that to someone else? Pretty sure no. Is there any TV show you watch religiously? No. Do you like the window seat or aisle seat on an airplane? WINDOW. I hate the aisle seat, mainly because I get dizzy when I can't see outside for some reason? I really don't know how that works, but when I sit at the window and can see what the plane is doing, I don't get dizzy. I also really want to just stare outside as I listen to my iPod. Has anyone ever really insulted you? Yes. Do you ever make banana sandwiches? I have a peanut butter and banana sandwich rarely. What’s your favorite movie soundtrack? Probably Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron. Phil went HARD, y'all. Did your parents teach you how to cook/bake when you were growing up? There were rare occasions where I helped cook, but I never really learned. If you could own any three fictional objects from any book/movie/show, what would you choose? (does not have to all be from the same book/movie/show) Ohhh, interesting. I'm going to include games in this, because that's what I'm most informed in. ... And I'm still blanking. OH! Definitely a Dreamvisitor from Wings of Fire, as I think it'd be pretty cool or even useful to see into other's dreams and even communicate. The Obsidian Mirror from the same series would also be pretty cool, but also seems somewhat immoral to me, I guess, to be able to spy on others. I mean it could be useful in some cases, but still. I somehow can't think of a third one, even after expanding my options to games. A lot of game objects are just too specific to their fantasy universe and not helpful in real life. What’s the shortest amount of time you’ve worked somewhere? Not even two hours lmaoooo. Have you ever negotiated a pay raise? No. Have you ever been a victim of identity theft? No. Do you know anyone who’s had their kids taken by Child Protective Services? No. What is your favorite smell/scent? Cinnamon rolls. How long can you run without stopping? I honestly don't think I *could* run without my knees immediately being like "um excuse the fuck out of you" and crumpling. What age do you want to live to? I know this varies from person to person, so I can't say an exact age, but I do. NOT. Want to live to where I'm a liability/require other people to take care of me, like give me a bath and stuff. No. Fuck-ing. Thank you. If you had a time machine, when would you go to? I'd honestly want a glimpse into my future, just to see how I'll be. At the same time though, I feel like knowing would suck if I saw something bad instead of a good life. Like, I'd possibly be suicidal again if it's just crap. I feel like if I was legitimately offered this, I would say no. Have you ever been infatuated with someone and you didn’t even know why? No. I think. Have you ever felt an earthquake? No. Is your more photogenic side your left or right? Well, because of how my hair is positioned, my left side. My hair is parted very far to the left, so the right side of my face is sorta cut diagonally by hair. Do you currently owe money to anyone? No. If you were ever to be on the news, what would you want it to be for? Something heroic, I guess. What’s the fastest you’ve ever driven? Accidentally, probably up to like 80 on the highway. Have you ever donated blood? Have you ever done a blood test? I have to both. Have you been inside of a burning building? What happened? Z O I N K S no. Do you believe in astrology/horoscopes? Nope. Have you ever dined alone at a restaurant? No. Have you been in a car accident? What happened? Yes. Some idiot was carrying wood in the back of his truck, and it wasn't secured whatsoever. He hit a bumpy spot, and some of the wood dropped to the road, and he began to swerve out of control. Nailed the side and bumper of my mom's car. Mom drove into a ditch, but in some manner to avoid us flipping over, which judging from the impact point, cops theorized was "supposed" to happen. Nowadays I am terrified to ride or drive behind trucks carrying anything in the back. Have you ever lived alone? No. Have you ever been stung by a bee? Once, on my leg. Have you ever bought stuff at a thrift store? Yeah, I love thrift shops. What was your very first email address? The one I still use now, so I won't share it. It fits me well, but I still hate sharing it, haha. It's just not very "adult-ish." How often do you take naps? Just about every day. Have you ever won a game of pool? Idr. Have you ever seen a tornado in real life? NOOOOOOOOOOO. Have you been in a long-distance relationship? Yes. Have you swam in the ocean? Yeah, I love it. Have you gone ziplining? No, but it'd be cool! Have you been rock climbing? No, just those mock walls at school field days and stuff. Have you hitchhiked? No. Have you had stitches? Where? My chin and then at the very base of my spine. Have you ridden in a taxi? What about an Uber/Lyft? None of those. Have you ridden on a horse? Not legit, but at childhood festivals where there are some horses that walk in a circle... the poor things. I would LOVE to ride a non-restrained, tame horse. Ugh, I wish I could have a horse in general. Their ability to bond with humans is magical. I'll never actually have one, though. I could nooot do all the care they require, and I don't plan on living somewhere where having a horse is appropriate. Have you taken part in a protest? What for? No, just boycotting. Have you ever signed a petition? Yes. I can't remember all of them. Have you ever been fired from a job? Why? No. Have you ever given someone else a haircut? No. What is the longest your hair has been? Just past the small of my back. Have you ever been stranded because your car broke down? No. Thank god for phones, lol. Have you performed on stage? What did you do? Yes, for school band concerts as well as dance recitals. Have you ever used a tanning bed? What about tanning spray? No. How do you prefer to celebrate your birthday? Just quiet and chill with my family, but still give me alone time, please. Who is the best cook that you know? /shrug Do you believe in Bigfoot? What about the Loch Ness Monster? The Loch Ness Monster I don't, but I find surviving sasquatches very possible. There's just too many reported sightings to be totally ignored. I'm not 100% on them still being around, though. I feel like we would've caught one by now. Do your friends tend to be male or female? Female. If you could change anything about human nature, what would it be? Our proclivity to violence when angered. Have you ever fainted? Yes. What skills would you like to learn? Cooking, how to handle money in various contexts, social skills... There's a lot of things. What animal do you have the most possessions *of*, or featuring? Meerkats, for sure. If you smoke marijuana, what is your preferred or typical method? I don’t. Do you remain friends with anyone you met at your first job? No. Are there any flowers planted outside your house? No. Do you have a favourite outfit that you like to wear for nights out? I don't have "nights out." When you have a soft drink, do you prefer it in a bottle or can? I like cans because the metal helps it stay cold. Who was the last person to embarrass you? What did they do? I don't know. When you’re upset, do you tend to comfort eat or lose your appetite? I am a BAD comfort eater. Who was the last person to send you a message on Facebook? Does/did that person go to the same school as you? My online friend Sammy. No. Has a stranger ever offered to buy you a drink? No. When was the last time you used a public toilet? Ummm I think for my birthday lunch at The Cheesecake Factory. Who did you have your first kiss with? Do you remember what colour his/her eyes were? Jason has brown eyes. Are there any themes from TV shows that you like to sing along to? That '70s Show and especially Supernatural.
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Skekso for the character thing ?
I have almost half of the skeksis down LMAO. Good keep them coming.
Why I like them
I look back on his death scene in the movie just as skekSil is reaching for his scepter he lunges for it, proclaims “I’m still emperor”, and dies shortly after. I remember his voice actor, Jason Issacs, talk about how the skeksis fear being irrelevant on top of death. For the majority of his life skekSo fought so hard to keep his empire. He silenced anyone who spoke out against him, basically enslaved an entire race to avoid them turning on him, and kept his own kin in check through fear and violence. He knew that they were always eyeing the throne and any sign of weakness would be exploited. The Emperor keeps up this facade of a strong, brutal, but benevolent ruler. But as he aged, he grew paranoid that all he has ever worked for could end. And that he could cease to exist and fade from memory.
His conversation with skekVar put such an interesting light on his character and added a ton of depth. He views the “nightmares” of his life as SoSu with dread and the pain the division caused. What awaits all of them once their life ends. With everything here it’s no wonder why he clings on to life, to power, to his own individuality. It also brings up an interesting idea that his behavior and decisions were based on SoSu’s experiences. That the reason he fights so hard to keep himself alive is the subconscious need to express himself in a way he never could as SoSu. Also just the fact that even though he was scared of death, he experimented with the Darkening, knowing full well that it’s causing him to rot rapidly. All for the sake of power. It just makes him such a cool villain.
Why I don’t
I mean he orchestrated a genocide, pushed several of his subordinates to commit atrocities along with giving them impossible tasks which led to punishment, abused a good plenty of them, let his fear of death influence his decision making, was an awful leader in general.
Favorite episode (scene if movie)
When he’s alone with skekVar and he’s divulging how he’s been experimenting with the darkening. Good scene.
Favorite season/movie
Once again, AOR over movie by a long shot.
Favorite line
(When skekSo chooses skekVar to take skekSil’s place at his side)
skekVar: I am honored, sire. skekSo: No! You are commanded.
Favorite outfit
I mean I love his outfit, but him in his bathing gear is jarring in such a good way.
OTP
skekSo and urSu. If they actually worked together, they may have accomplished what the urskeks were sent to Thra to do. Also I just like the thought of their relationship dynamic: sort of chaotic with a lot of compromises.
Brotp
I talked about how skekSo and skekVar would have had a positive friendship last post so let’s talk about something else. I’m actually interested in seeing something between skekSo and skekMal. The Emperor has control over one of the most wild, unpredictable skeksis but apparently was noted to admire him. I know he was trying to revive him as a way to keep himself in denial about his own demise, he did want the Hunter to have a funeral. And he did honor him by having his body hosted up next to his throne. I theorize skekSo had challenged skekMal when they were much younger and asserted his power over him (their fight was likely pretty bloody). Or when skekMal witnessed skekSo beating skekShod down for defying him the Hunter was impressed. I feel like the two would have a mutual respect for each other.
I also like the idea of skekSo and skekGra getting along when the latter was still the Conqueror. He was expanding skekSo’s kingdom after all, I feel like they’d be on good terms. And then becomes mortified when skekGra comes up to him and dare suggest they should hang with their mystics and that they were actually one being and this would end skekSo’s empire. I like to think he drilled that nail into skekGra’s head himself.
Head Canon
When he was younger, he had dark hair/fur/feathers with iridescence. Kind of like a starling.
Unpopular opinion
Everyone would have been better off if skekSo wasn’t put in power. Of course the other skeksis would have fought for power, but they’d have a much weaker rule and perhaps they may have had better chances at making it to the next Great Conjuction.
A wish
I just want to see more of skekSo’s descent and how much he’ll sacrifice to remain in power.
An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen
Anything like that scene with Seladon to not happen again. That was brutal.
5 words to best describe them
Cruel | Paranoid | Power-hungry | Dictator | Thanatophobic
My nickname for them
Grandpa Piss
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Kid!Logan au pt.4
Fandom: Thomas Sanders, Sanders Sides
Pairings: platonic LAMP
Summary: Logan would say that he signed up for a movie night, not this, but he didn’t really sign up at all, now did he?
Masterlist Link
They go to Roman’s house.
Logan hates it.
“No need to look so gloomy, Shortstop.” Roman grins as he hops out of the car.
Logan sulks in the backseat, reluctant to exit. The two-story house is big and nice and has a manicured lawn with the most elegant looking plastic flamingo he has ever seen positioned by the mailbox and Logan hates it.
“Could we not have gone to Patton or Virgil’s house for this gathering? Were those not options?”
Roman’s dramatics are difficult enough to bear when at school. In his own home though?
“My place is small,” Virgil explains, still sitting in the backseat with him. Patton has already gotten out so it’s just them two. “As for Patton, he’s got a big family. It’s always been easiest to hang out at Roman’s.”
Logan turns towards him. From the way he talks, the three of them have been coming over to Roman’s for a long time. He wants to ask about it, understand how people can remain so close for so long, and distantly he wonders if their bond will waver once they’re out of high school, like so many friendships do.
“Why are you still in the car?” Logan asks. “Do you not want to go inside?”
Virgil looks out the windows, eyes lingering towards the front door the other two have disappeared through. “I know we kinda pushed this on you, and I’m sorry.”
An apology.
That isn’t what he expects, nor is he quite comfortable with the subdued air around Virgil. Logan shakes his head, voice dripping with disdain, “If anything, I am more than happy to blame this entirely on Roman.”
Virgil stifles a laugh with his hand. “Ya know, I can talk to him. Make him take you home if you really don’t want to stay. He’s not really an asshole, just an extrovert.”
“Thank you, but that won’t be necessary.” Logan opens the car door, ready to get out. “I might as well stay and let you all get this ‘hanging out’ with me out of your systems. You’ll soon find I’m not the most ‘fun’ person to be around.”
Virgil smirks. “Don’t hold your breath.”
They go inside and the interior is just as gorgeous as the outside. Afternoon sunlight streams in through gossamer curtains, shining bright across the wood floor. The rooms are washed in soothing creams accented by rose gold light fixtures. Potted plants litter the place, the touches of green standing out. In the dining room they pass, Logan spies a twinkling chandelier.
“What do Roman’s parents do?” Logan asks conversationally.
“Eh, his mom’s a realtor and his dad is . . . something.”
“Something?”
“I forget how to pronounce it but it’s like in engineering or something. He takes contracts out of state a lot. Why do you ask?”
Logan looks around them pointedly. “Well they certainly don’t appear to be lower class.” He looks up at Virgil to find his gaze boring into him. “What?”
Virgil shakes himself. “Nothing, just . . . Most kids don’t really make those kinds of observations.”
Logan frowns. “I am not most kids. I am only me, and that���s all I know how to be.”
“. . . is that why you don’t try to pretend?”
“Pretend what?”
From across the house, they hear Roman shout, “Are you guys coming or what? I can hear you breathing in there.”
“No you can’t, shut up!” Virgil rolls his eyes. He knocks lightly at Logan’s shoulder. “C’mon, before Princey throws a hissy fit.”
Logan is led down a hall to the other end of the house where a den opens up. Two of the walls are made up entirely of windows, letting in more than enough natural light. In the middle of the room there’s a green table with a short net splitting the middle. Roman has a couple of paddles in his hands, waving them around.
“Today is the day you will know utter defeat, Shea!” Roman declares, aiming one of the paddles at Virgil.
Virgil tilts back his head and lets out a deep, evil chuckle. “In your dreams, Prince.” He tosses his bag onto a nearby chair and takes position at the other end of the table.
“Why is there a ping pong table here?” Logan asks in bewilderment, coming to stand next to Patton.
“To play ping pong,” Patton answers wisely.
Logan face palms. “No, I meant that I was under the impression that we were to have a movie night?”
“We have a loose definition for movie nights.” Virgil shrugs. He’s picked out a paddle for himself and spins the handle in his hand.
“We can still watch something later if you want,” Patton offers. “Virge and Ro usually play a few rounds first though.”
“With Patton as our lovely score keeper!” Roman bellows in an announcer voice.
“I’ve got a whistle,” Patton shows Logan gleefully, as if that makes it official.
“That is indeed a whistle,” is all Logan can think to say.
“Enough chit-chat,” Roman interrupts impatiently and—mother of god, he’s posing at Virgil to intimate him or something. “The gauntlet has been thrown down! You must answer its call.”
“That eager to lose?” Virgil taunts.
“The only one who will be losing today is you, Surly Temple.”
They’re standing at either end of the table now, but Roman is still armed with two paddles.
“Isn’t that against the rules?” Logan points out. “It’ll give him an unfair advantage.”
Virgil doesn’t look bothered in the slightest. “Not that it matters.”
Patton leans down to whisper to Logan, “Roman’s never won a single match.”
“Is he that bad?”
“No, Virgil’s just that good.”
Now Logan’s eager to watch.
Virgil serves first. Roman smacks the ball lightning quick, his eyes sharp and more calculated than Logan is used to seeing. For as swift as Roman’s strikes are, Virgil’s are barely able to be followed. Logan theorizes that his movements are linked to muscle memory and sheer instinct. There’s a way that Virgil moves with serpentine fluidity, yet his strikes exude all the hunting prowess of a big cat.
While Virgil is fast on the attack, Roman is left playing goal keeper.
“That’s six to two!” Patton announces after Virgil scores yet again.
“I’ve never been interested in sports,” Logan mentions, eyes drinking in the frustrated snarl on Roman’s face. “But this is enthralling.”
“Oh, so you think you can do better?” Roman growls at Logan. “Just you wait. I’m still in this!”
“I’m rootin’ for ya, Roman!” Patton cheers. “You got this!”
“Aren’t you supposed to stay neutral?” Logan asks.
“Eh, well, he needs all the help he can get.”
“Patton! I can hear you!”
“Whoops! Sorry, kiddo!”
Logan shakes his head. In truth, he’s older than these kids, and these silly antics are why he didn’t bother pursuing social connections outside of school. They’re loud and childish, and he has no need of them. That’s what he told himself going into this.
That’s what he tries to tell himself now.
Wonder of wonders, he’s fighting down the urge to smile.
By the time Virgil scores his ninth point, he’s grinning like a shark. In school, he isn’t one to talk much. Logan had easily picked up on his introverted nature and his nervous tendencies like hiding in the hood of his jacket or picking at his nails or clothing.
Here, paddle in hand and Roman struggling to catch up, he’s in his element. This is Virgil outside of school, walls down.
“He’s a real powerhouse, isn’t he,” Patton laughs softly. He must have noticed Logan’s staring.
“I haven’t seen him so energized before,” Logan hums in agreement.
“You should get him talking about his favorite bands or shows or games,” Patton says with a fond smile. “He can talk for hours about Kingdom Hearts or Evanescence. Oh! And spiders. He really loves spiders, even if they are abominations who roam the Earth spreading nothing but misery and despair and should all be annihilated by way of fire.”
“Patton . . . are you okay?”
“I’ve seen things.”
“Patton, serve’s up,” Roman calls for his attention.
He snaps out of the haunted stare he’d been giving Logan. “Right! Go ahead!”
The score becomes ten to six. Virgil needs one more point to win, according to the rules. They’re both panting lightly after their exertions.
“It’s not too late to forfeit,” Roman goads him.
Virgil’s eyes gleam in amusement. “Aw, it’s cute that you still think you have a chance.”
He tosses the ball into the air and smacks it down with unrelenting force. Roman, still in his banter mode, is unprepared and doesn’t have time to raise his paddles. The ball goes right for his face and he falls flat on his butt.
“Game, set, and match.” Virgil drops the paddle like a mic.
Everyone startles when Roman leaps to his feet, the ping pong ball clenched between his teeth.
“A-hah!” Roman grunts victoriously.
“What the fuck, dude,” Virgil says, one eye squinted and the other wide.
“Did you catch that with your mouth?” Patton asks in awe.
Roman stands tall, fists on hips, bellows of laughter seeping around the ping pong.
“Even I must admit that’s impressive,” Logan acknowledges. “But you do realize that you still lost for failing to keep the ball in play?”
His pride-struck expression falls. Roman goes to argue, but in his rush he accidentally chokes on the ball.
“Spit it out, you moron!” Virgil practically vaults over the table, he’s there so fast beating on Roman’s back. Roman’s hands clutch desperately at his throat, pupils blown wide in fear. Patton’s there in an instant but isn’t sure what to do.
Logan does the only logical thing and punches Roman in the gut.
The little white ball dislodges and pops out of his mouth. It soars through the air to bounce sadly away. Roman coughs repeatedly, face red and eyes watering as Virgil and Patton hold him up.
“Are you okay? Can you breathe okay?” Patton asks frantically. He pats at Roman’s back to help him along. Roman nods through his coughing.
Virgil runs his hands through his hair and blows out a heavy gust of air. “Holy shit, I cannot believe that just happened.”
“Now what have we learned today, kiddos?” Patton asks sternly.
“Just punch away all of your problems,” Virgil answers.
Patton is not amused and Virgil giggles, borderline hysterical.
Roman gets his breathing under control. He stands up straighter, wiping the spittle away from his mouth. He looks at Logan in a whole new light.
“You saved my life,” Roman rasps.
“I didn’t mean to,” Logan automatically responds. His fist is still raised and slightly shaking. “I know the Heimlich maneuver would have been a better method . . . but I just—my body acted without thinking. I apologize, Roman—”
Without warning, Roman sweeps him up in a hug. Logan is very, very not okay with this.
“Awww,” Patton cooes.
“Roman, please, my feet are meant to be on the floor.”
“You brought me back from the brink of death,” Roman sniffles, far too emotional for Logan’s tastes.
Logan stops squirming and accepts his fate (Roman’s biceps have to be made with steel). “Is this that bonding thing I’ve heard about?”
“Shhh, just accept it.”
“It burns.”
“That’s the bond setting in.”
“I think I’m allergic.”
“Maybe we should move on to something a little less exciting?” Patton suggests. “We’re having a little too much of a ball in here.”
“I’m never playing ping pong again,” Virgil swears.
“Movies then?”
“Yes please.”
A/N: Alternate scene, because I almost had Patton be the one to punch Roman in the stomach.
Patton’s there in an instant, fist pummeling into Roman’s mid-section. He heaves up the ball and nearly his lunch.
Patton stands proud and blows off imaginary dust from his fist. “Works every time.”
“Patton,” Roman gets out between wheezes and coughs. “You beautiful man . . . I hate you.”
Patton just pats Roman on the head.
“I’m sorry, I think I need to just--” Virgil cuts himself off by lying down on the ground to stare up at the ceiling. Logan is half-inclined to join him.
Patton lets out a laugh. “Nothing like a near-death experience to get the ole blood pumper going, am I right?”
Both Roman and Virgil flip him the bird.
“You’re doing the ‘I love you’ hand sign wrong, kiddos. It’s three fingers, not one.”
Logan crouches down beside Virgil. “Do you think you could teach me how to play ping pong once you’re emotionally stable?”
Logan wants to learn.
For scientific reasons of course.
Not because he wants to beat Roman into the ground or anything.
General Tag List: @spectralheartt @a-pastel-pan @notalwaysthevillian @rose-gold-roman @ijustrealizedhowdumbmynamewas @katie-the-noble-fangirl @yourroyalydramaticanxiousness @aroundofapplesauce @merlybird500 @beach-fan @jemthebookworm @whats-going-on-kiddos @randomsandersides @gamerfreddie @unring-this-bell @that-royal-ravenclaw @analogicallythinking @lilygold23 @punsterterry @naw2702 @levy-the-b00kw0rm @iolanomsgranola @tacohippy56900 @lottavic @camariechris
Kid Logan au list: @under-the-blue-moonlight @broadwaytheanimatedseries @just-fic-me-up @joyful-milkshake-observation @absolutesandersidestrash @midnightmagi @justcallmepancake @justanotherpurplebutterfly @aamikan @nerd-in-space @thestrangedino @deathshadowrules @entitydark @vintage-squid @max-is-tired @theitalianalchemist @deceitfullyanxiousprince @thesynysterunknown @skullfire2004 @shai-uwu @teacupfulofstarshine @the5thcoy
#sanders sides#platonic lamp#logan#logan sanders#virgil#virgil sanders#patton#patton sanders#roman#roman sanders#kid logan au#writing#fanfiction
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Mirror, Mirror: When Movie Characters Look Back at Themselves by Sheila O’Malley
“I always feel it behind me. It’s myself. And I follow me. In silence. But I can hear it. Yes, sometimes it’s like I’m chasing myself. I want to escape from myself. But I can’t!” —Peter Lorre as child-murderer, M (1931)
There was a period in the ‘60s and ‘70s when you could barely call yourself a male movie star if you didn’t do a scene where you stared at yourself in the mirror, doing various “private” things. The device shows up before then, too, but the floodgates opened in the ‘60s and ‘70s. Meryl Streep has observed, “Often the scenes that are the most exciting, and most illuminating in film, are the ones with no dialogue…where a character is doing something alone, where the deepest most private self is revealed or explored. Exposed.”
Mirrors have multiple thematic uses (as well as the obvious directorial choice to add visual interest to the frame). But if a character is inarticulate, then seeing him “deal with” his reflection can fill in some gaps. It’s a great storytelling shortcut. If the character has a firm public “mask,” a “mirror scene” can let us see who he is when no one is watching. We all lie, to some degree, out there in the world (or on social media). We construct a “self” and a mirror scene allows the character to strip that away.
Speaking stereotypically (or, in archetypes), what is expected of male characters in terms of public persona is different from the pressures on female characters. Not better or worse, just different. Crying, showing uncertainty, weakness, vulnerability … can be a minefield. This is why the glut of male mirror scenes in the 70s makes a kind of sense: as the women’s movement rose, men began to wonder about their place, as well as buck against some of the gender norms imposed on them (or, in some cases, re-entrench said gender norms, Travis Bickle’s “You talkin’ to me” the most classic example).
Shakespeare’s use of the soliloquy—in particular for Kings and prospective Kings—could be seen as mirror scenes, with the audience as the mirror. A man goes into a private space, showing the audience things he cannot show on the battlefield or in the court. Hamlet, one of the most introverted of Shakespeare’s characters, showing non-gender-norm qualities of uncertainty and sensitivity, has a massive six soliloquies. (“O that this too too solid flesh would melt”, “O what a rogue and peasant slave am I”, “To be or not to be”, “Tis now the very witching time of night”, “Now might I do it pat” and “How all occasions do inform against me.”) It is impossible to imagine the play—or Hamlet—without them. In Richard II, after Richard is forced to surrender his crown, what is the first thing he does? Like a true narcissist, he calls for a mirror. As he stares at himself, he wonders,
“Was this face the face That every day under his household roof Did keep ten thousand men?”
and throws the mirror on the ground.
Mirrors are powerful and mysterious symbols. The doubling-up can mean all kinds of things. Alice steps through the looking glass into another world. Goethe’s Faust looks into the witch’s mirror and sees a beautiful woman staring back. Dorian Gray takes a mirror to compare his face with the one in the attic portrait. (Like Richard III, Dorian smashes the mirror.) A mirror is crucial in Tennyson’s “The Lady of Shalott,” where “The Lady” is cursed to view the world only through a mirror. But then Lancelot rides by and she can’t help it, she has to sneak a peek. Maybe the most famous fictional mirror is the Evil Queen’s in “Snow White,” the one she asks every day, “Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who’s the fairest of them all?” Richard III doesn’t look for a reflection of his beauty. He wonders where his “self” even is, without the crown.
An early male mirror scene—and one of the best—is Peter Lorre’s in Fritz Lang’s M (1931). Our first glimpse of Lorre’s face comes without warning. As a handwriting-analyst theorizes in voiceover about the child-killer’s psychology, we see him, staring at himself in the mirror. He pulls at his face, slowly, manipulating his mouth into a smile, trying it on for size, maybe seeing what it looks like to the children he seduces. He bugs his eyes out, turning this way, that, a maniacal presence, almost like a shark rolling its eyes backwards as it attacks. He has no sense of what human beings feel like, of what he looks like, of how to even make a facial expression. It’s one of the most chilling private moments in cinema.
Speaking of “private moments”: Constantin Stanislavski wrote a lot about how actors needed to feel “solitude in public.” He wrote: ”During a performance, before an audience of thousands, you can always enclose yourself in this circle…You can carry it with you wherever you go.” Lee Strasberg developed his “private moment exercise” to help actors achieve “solitude in public.” There are things you do when you are alone which you would stop doing if someone walked in. Maybe you sing along to the radio. Maybe you talk to yourself. Maybe you pick your nose. Maybe you do all of these things simultaneously. Our “public” selves are drilled into us from a very young age. There are “good manners,” there are “contexts” to be memorized—what flies at home will not fly outside the home. Breaking down the public face, letting an audience see who you are when you are by yourself, is part of the actor’s job. (It’s not a surprise that the '70s came to be dominated by private-moment mirror scenes, considering the influence of the Strasberg method on acting styles.)
One of the most important mirror scenes, and a huge influence on Martin Scorsese, is Marlon Brando’s in Reflections in a Golden Eye, directed by John Huston. Brando plays Major Weldon Penderton, a closeted gay man married to a frustrated, luscious Elizabeth Taylor. Late at night, Penderton sits alone, staring at pictures of naked male statues from Greek antiquity. The character lives in an almost totally male world (the military), turned on by young soldiers, and terrified of revealing himself. In one scene, alone downstairs in the house, he walks into the hall and stares at himself in the mirror. After a moment of vacuity, he begins to talk to himself, or, more vulnerably, to an imaginary other person. He pretends to respond to what the other person says, he practices laughing, and he smiles, but the smile is superimposed. He can’t get it to look real. What he says is a kind of murmur, a “pretense” of conversation. This is the kind of vulnerability Brando could achieve like no other. Without this scene, the Major could have been a caricature. All we see is his fuddy-duddy sexless stiff public mask. The mirror scene shows his confusion at how to be a man, how to navigate even a casual conversation.
Alain Delon has a stunning mirror moment in Purple Noon (1960), Rene Clement’s adaptation of Patricia Highsmith’s The Talented Mr. Ripley. Delon plays the sociopath Tom Ripley, in thrall to his casually masculine friend Philippe Greenleaf (Maurice Ronet). Delon’s chilly presence onscreen works to beautiful effect: He doesn’t show us much. But then, he tries on Philippe’s clothes, a sleek pinstripe jacket, fancy shoes. He checks himself out in the mirror. Most actors would leave it at that. But Delon understood the homoerotic implications of the script, not to mention the character’s dangerous narcissism. Delon leans into the mirror and gives himself a rapturous long kiss, slitting his eyes open at one point, to check out what he looks like.
It’s interesting to contrast this with the same scene in the 1999 adaptation, The Talented Mr. Ripley, starring Matt Damon. Director Anthony Minghella makes the subtext practically text, by placing mirrors in almost every scene (the final shot of Ripley is through a mirror). When Ripley tries on his friend’s clothes, he dances around to Bing Crosby’s “May I,” doing a vaudeville burlesque. It’s a different kind of rapture than Delon’s swooning kiss. Damon’s drag-style dance is more for the audience, an explicit display of inner gay-ness, what Ripley is hiding beneath his good-natured submissive public persona. It’s a good scene, although I prefer Delon’s. Delon’s kiss is Stanislavsky’s “public solitude”—and it shows the terrifying void within the character. There is no self. The entire world is a mirror.
In Karel Reisz’s gritty Saturday Night and Sunday Morning, Albert Finney’s Arthur, in a whirl of work, sex, and alcohol, is suddenly caught by his reflection one hungover morning. He was beat up the night before. He plays at being a sniper through his window, targeting local women with pellets. It’s a thin line between playfulness and murderous acting-out. Finney digs into this aspect of the character when he suddenly speaks to his reflection. It is a statement of bravado before descending into confusion: ”I’m me and nobody else. Whatever people say I am that’s what I am not, because they don’t know a bloody thing about me. God knows what I am.”
For the opening sequences of Rocky, we see Rocky Balboa’s normal “day in the life.” We are introduced to him through various public selves. But when he goes home to his dank apartment, feeding his turtles, gentle and quiet, his loneliness is so acute it reverbs off the screen. Childhood photographs of him line the mirror frame, and Rocky stares at them, his big-lug face almost crushed in disappointment. Holding a container of turtle food, he starts to talk to himself. What he’s saying doesn’t sound like anything, just private-moment murmurings, but in the next scene, when he goes to visit the girl in the pet store, it becomes clear. He was practicing a joke to tell her, a joke designed to make her laugh, show her he’s a safe person, he’s nice. Rocky practicing a joke in the mirror is one of Stallone’s most vulnerable moments as an actor (and evidence of his gift as a screenwriter).
John Travolta’s mirror moment in 1977’s Saturday Night Fever is star-making, not just because of Travolta’s almost otherworldly gorgeousness (as well as how he revels in said gorgeousness, behavior considered coded-female). Surrounded by 1970s icons—posters of Rocky, Serpico, and Farrah Fawcett—he blow-dries his hair, places gold chains around his neck, and stands like a superhero in his black speedo briefs, shot from below. Perhaps the most revealing thing about the scene is that when his father barges into the room, Travolta’s Tony Manero does not stop what he is doing. His lack of embarrassment tells us everything we need to know about the character.
Francis Ford Coppola’s epic, Apocalypse Now begins with a hallucinatory sequence showing a PTSD-rattled Martin Sheen, holed up in a hotel room in Saigon, tormented by memories. In one shocking moment, Sheen stands unsteadily, and lurches around in front of the mirror, flailing his arms out in imitation martial-arts moves, an attempt to combat his helplessness and anguish, his impotence. But the gap between reality and fantasy is too great, and he, like Richard III, smashes the mirror.
Richard Gere’s mirror moment in American Gigolo is a distant cousin of John Travolta’s. His Julian has carefully crafted an immaculate persona for his female clients, and part of the movie’s pull is watching it get stripped away. At home, Julian wanders around, practicing Swedish, working out, picking out clothes for his next appointment. He’s vain, but vanity is part of his job. Smokey Robinson’s “The Love I Saw In You Was Just a Mirage,” and it’s perfect because Julian literally is a mirage. To his clients, to himself, even. When he stands in front of the mirror, flexing his muscles, he is more Evil Queen than Richard III, a destabilizing of gender norms around male sexuality (and self-presentation) which is so much a part of the film. (When Julian meets a private detective, it’s at a joint called the Me & Me Coffee Shop. Julian’s hall of mirrors shatters by the end of American Gigolo: in the final scene, he talks to Lauren Hutton through a glass partition in prison. The mirror is no more. He can see through it now to the other person, and, crucially, he can be seen, too, as he really is.)
The most famous mirror moment is, of course, Robert De Niro’s in Taxi Driver. In the insomniac voiceover, his Travis Bickle says, “I think that someone should become a person like other people,” showing the character’s alienation from other humans. You aren’t already a person, to Travis: you have to become one. As Travis descends into psychosis, dreaming of 1. impressing the cool blonde (Cybill Shepherd) who rejected him after he took her to a porn movie on their first date and 2. rescuing the child prostitute Iris (Jodie Foster), he begins to amass a small arsenal, putting together boot holsters and straps to go around his wiry body. In the unforgettable moment when he checks himself out in the mirror, he goes into a zone of macho fantasy. (Schrader’s script said only “Travis speaks to himself in the mirror.” De Niro’s “You talkin’ to me” was his improvisation.) De Niro goes so far into his sense of privacy, it’s almost embarrassing to watch. And yet it’s so human, too. (If you say you’ve never talked to yourself in the mirror, or sung in the shower, you’re lying.)
De Niro’s second mirror moment is Raging Bull’s final scene, when the bloated Jake La Motta recites Marlon Brando’s “I coulda been a contender” monologue from On the Waterfront, before standing up and doing a series of “pumping up” exercises, to get ready to go onstage. (Side note: Mary Elizabeth Winstead closes out Eva Vives’ wonderful 2018 film All About Nina, about a troubled stand-up comic, with a re-creation of the scene from Raging Bull.) What’s fascinating about the Raging Bull scene is that Jake La Motta has no “self” to reveal. It’s almost like there’s no inner life at all. He doesn’t “get it.” He never did, he never will. De Niro blanks himself out in a very unnerving way, opposite to the dangerous vengeful-spirit fantasy he inhabits in Taxi Driver.
Although Walter Hill’s Johnny Handsome descends into a cliched crime movie with paper-thin characters, the opening sequences are dark, cynical, and atmospheric. Mickey Rourke plays Johnny, a man with a deformed head, an “ugly” appearance which has separated him from other humans. Reminiscent of the Joan Crawford film A Woman’s Face, a caring plastic surgeon (Forest Whittaker) offers to operate on Johnny, to give him a chance at a new life. When Rourke unwraps the bandages and sees his new face (i.e. Rourke’s real face), Rourke has a mirror moment like almost no other, a moment worthy to be placed alongside Brando’s and De Niro’s. He touches his face with wonder, bursting into tears. That’s touching enough, but then, as he glances back at Whitaker, Rourke goes deeper. A look of fear, and lifelong anguish floods his eyes, as he says, “I feel like I still have a mask on” and then, after that, Rourke goes even deeper into a maelstrom of emotion: gratitude, bafflement, awe, despair. The scene is Rourke’s finest hour.
Up until recently (with a couple of exceptions), when women stared at themselves in the mirror in the movies, it was obvious what they are doing: touching up their makeup, checking out their mask. Once again, in the 1960s and 70s, women started doing “mirror scenes” equivalent to men’s mirror scenes, where the purpose was not perfecting the public mask, but to - as Sylvia Plath wrote in her poem “Mirror” - search “my reaches for what she really is.” Faye Dunaway has a great one in Jerry Schatzberg’s Puzzle of a Downfall Child. Gena Rowlands has quite a few “mirror scenes” in the movies she did with Cassavetes (there’s a couple of stunners in Opening Night). In my favorite moment in Sofia Coppola’s The Bling Ring, after breaking into Paris Hilton’s house, Katie Chang goes into a daze of mad-woman fantasy, staring at herself in Paris’ mirror. It’s not hard to imagine the character slipping into the Manson family, if a Manson came along. She’s as blank as Jake La Motta. In La Verite’s opening scene, Brigitte Bardot stares at her face in a broken shard of a mirror, right before marching off for her court date. Her “self” is fragmented, broken. Jennifer Jason Leigh has an extraordinary extended “mirror scene” in Georgia. The moment is everything: self-hatred, rage, searching and longing, and bone-deep narcissism.
Men staring at themselves in the mirror let us into their secret worlds, their fantasies and anxieties, uncertainties and vulnerabilities. It’s not about being self-obsessed. It’s trying to find the self, the self that is not allowed free rein, be it a benign self or a malevolent one.
In Caravaggio’s “Narcissus,” Narcissus leans towards his reflection in the water, his posture pulled downwards with a seductive tug. He braces himself by his hands on the ground, and his knee, bulging out beneath his torso, is the only barrier between Narcissus and his reflection (and, perhaps, drowning). In the painting the reflection below is cut off; all we see are the forearms and that gleaming sturdy knee. Even though Narcissus’ body is barely visible, even though he’s hunched over himself, his energy is childlike, soft and open. He gives his reflection a caressing stare, a swooning look. He yields. This is not just vanity. This is something else.
#musings#film writing#film essay#oscilloscope laboratories#beastie boys#adam yauch#independent film#mirror#taxi driver#robert de niro#Martin Scorsese#american gigolo#fritz lang m#peter lorre#the bling ring#sofia coppola#shakespeare#richard ii#saturday night fever#john travolta#rocky#sylvester stallone#gena rowlands#faye dunaway#marlon brando#reflections in a golden eye#raging bull#jake lamotta#johnny handsome#mickey rourke
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Fanfiction Reader Tag
Tagged by @eyeliner-vampire ♡ ♡
Fanfiction Reader Tag!
1. When did you start reading Fanfic (How old you were or how long ago)?
When I was probably...11 ish? so like 13 years ago
2. Do you have an AO3 account?
Yeh (LadyWisteria)
3. Do you read WIP (work in progress)? Why or why not?
All the time. I’m not picky about this at all. I’m a simple person. I see fic I think I’ll like? I read. doesn’t matter if it’s finished or not. I’ll make up my own ending til it is lol. also authors need that encouragement. finishing stuff is hard
4. What time of day is your ‘fic reading time’?
Usually late at night (like 1 a.m. and later..much later) but sometimes I’ll waste an afternoon instead (2 p.m. ish til I either have to go to work or I finish the fic)
5. How much time do you spend reading fic per week?
Not remotely as much time as I used, that’s for sure. Anywhere from an hour (if I’m rereading That favorite fic) to 2-4 hours if my friend has sent me a longfic again.
6. Do you listen to podfic (fanfic recorded like an audiobook)?
I...didn’t even know this was a thing tbh, so no. Sounds very neat but also I don’t listen to audio books anymore bcus my attention span re: audio input has gotten so bad over the years I can’t focus for more than a few minutes.
7. What’s your favorite fic genre to read?
AUs AUs AUs. and fantasy. and fantasy AUs (although good long AU fics are harder to find). I am a very simple person. I see magic mentioned, I read. I also read a lot of romance fic (proving once again that fanfic writing is often better than mainstream original writing, bcus romance is one of my least favorite YA/movie genres). I don’t read as much of them but I also love mystery and paranormal fics
8. Are there any genres that you tend to avoid?
Super angsty no happy ending type stuff. “Major Character Death” is an automatic nope lmao (unless the summary looks reaallyyy interesting or it was recc’d to me). Tragedy is definitely Not my thing
9. What tag(s) do you track?
I don’t track any fic tags (I stopped tracking tags at all since Tumblr changed it from “keeping track of new posts in said tag” to “dropping random posts from that tag into the middle of your dash, and usually the same three”)
10. How do you find new fic?
Nowadays I mostly just read what friends send me or the new stuff a very few writers I follow post, but sometimes I also come across stuff through Twitter or Tumblr and curiosity wins out
11. How do you organize your fic bookmarks?
I..don’t? Is this a thing people do?? If I wanna reread something I either search through my bookmarks by title/author or just. filter by fandom.
12. Do you subscribe to authors or stories?
Yeh. I only keep up with a very select few of them though. altho part of that is due to several of them being people I followed on fanfic.net years and years ago and never unfollowed, even though our interests may no longer be the same. (the other part is me going “oh I’ll read that later” and then just. never doing it.)
13. What is your favorite fanfic trope?
fake dating and bed sharing are always good
everyone is gay. also Good
14. What kind of plot line are you always here for?
“everything’s the same but they’re soulmates” (oh my god they were soulmates)
mafia AU
MAGIC
I really like in-between scene fics too. the events and character interactions that happen off-screen. I like writing those
15. What can an author do to make you love them?
write about my faves frequently
cool AUs
write about minor characters
good sense of humor
16. What can an author do to make you avoid them?
not into mpreg fics
a/b/o fics make me super wary I usually pass on those, even if the summary looks mildly interesting. they’re rarely if ever done in a way that isn’t rapey and gross
don’t care for fics period that have rapey scenes but you’re supposed to find them romantic
adult/minor ships
characterization is a big deal to me so if I don’t like how they handle the characters, especially faves I probably won’t be back
17. What do kudos mean to you?
when I get one I have a few seconds of “oh someone kinda liked this thing I wrote” and then I carry on about my day >.>;;; (I do appreciate them tho)
18. What kind of commenter are you (No comment, short comment, keyboard smash)?
I don’t comment as often as I mean to or wish I did, but when I do they’re loong comments (I’ve passed the AO3 character limit at least once kshg)
I tend to quote favorite parts and then react to them, and I like to theorize and ask questions about character’s thoughts at a certain part or what author imagines happens before/after the fic
19. Have you ever stopped reading a fic? Why or why not?
Yes. Once because I stumbled into a very sexually explicit fic when that was. Not at all what I was expecting (I was also very young lol), I think there was a very few I quit because they were boring or very poorly written, but most often I “quit” a fic for the same reason I don’t do audio books anymore lmao: because my attention span is sht and my motivation and commitment are extremely fickle things. I either forget or just wander away for a bit and then forget. Often I mean to come back and finish it; it’s just a matter of how long it takes. (I also second hand embarrassed out of a fic so hardcore that it’s been a whole 9 months since I’ve touched it khdfgd)
20. Have you ever read a fic more than once? What is it about that fic that makes you want to read it again?
YES. This requires like a minimum 4 separate posts to really answer but:
Behind Bricks and The Penance of a Killer by Deathbelle
this person is my fricking favorite author ever and these are two of my fricking favorite fics ever, I must’ve reread Behind Bricks 6 or 8 times now and Penance is the BokuAka-centric companion piece to my favorite fic of all time that I always wanted
Mending Bonds and If the Heart Breaks, Does That Mean There’s No Home? by RussianSunflower3
Mending Bonds is soft found family fluff centering on a very minor fave of mine and If the Heart Breaks is very angsty found family fluff that also focuses on some minor characters and it always hurts my heart but the ending and the soft middle always heal it right back up (“[Hanamaki] has a heart big enough for everyone in the world, and then some.” ohhhh my godd)
Boiled Frogs by ReginaGalaxia
this one is. a really hard read centered around emotional abuse and manipulation and hoooo boy it is a rough read especially if you’ve experienced any of that personally but it’s so well written and the character dynamics are great and in its lighter moments it’s fricking hilarious.
(bits and pieces of) The Roost by Ugglabarn
bits and pieces only bcus Roost has a lot of very heavy dark content that I’d have to be in a specific mood to reread the whole thing because it hurts my heart way too much but also it’s one of the best Fukurodani-centric longfics I’ve ever read (PLUS AN AU..!!) and I love love how they write the characters and how much focus there is on the minor members and ships and in its lighter moments Roost is also really funny the most recent chapter was hilarious
Expensive Hotel by Crown_of_Winterthorne
smut. explicit smut. excellent explicit smut with loving polyamorous boyfriends and plenty of consent discussion and kissing. my entire jam right there
Class 1-A Whomst? by Ya_Boi_Hal
this is the funniest chatfic I’ve ever read in my life and the first good chatfic I ever read. absolutely hysterical. also has some really good serious content in the middle and some Aizawa dialogue that punched me right in the feels. 12/10 will read again. sometimes I just randomly say “Mineta whomst??” and cackle to myself
and back in the day it was:
The Flame of Betrayal by DataIntegrationThoughtEntity
I guess traitor! Tahu was a popular trope back when Bionicle fandom was at its peak?? and not everyone liked it apparently but I enjoyed this fic greatly every time I read it it was well written and had interesting OCs and I am actually highly tempted to go reread it again
and Asleep Beneath a Wheat Field by Feline Freak
this was a very peculiar little OC-centric one shot that was also very sad and I don’t know why it grabbed me like it did but I remember rereading it 3 or 4 times at least
21. Do you like sequels?
The fics I like don’t usually come with sequels but The Penance of a Killer is one so Yes
22. Do you like dabbles?
I guess? I haven’t read too many I don’t think but hey, more fic is more fic. Who’s gonna complain about that?
23. What do you wish more fic authors would do?
Write about minor characters more
24. What do you wish more authors would stop doing?
that thing where they latch onto one facet of a character’s personality - or worse, one that fandom made up - and write them as if that’s the only trait they have
25. Do you like one-shots or multi-chapter?
Multi-chapter. I mean both are great obviously but the majority of my faves are multi-chapter and obviously if I like a fic I’m gonna wanna spend as much time in that universe as possible
26. How long do you like chapters to be?
Usually I feel the longer the better. once in a while I’ll hit one that’s so long it’s kind of distracting but extremely rarely
27. What’s your favorite POV (point of view) to read (first, second, third)?
Third
28. What do you think of OC’s?
I didn’t use to care for them very much but as I started reading fic by more advanced writers I found several I really liked. have a very small list of OCs from recent fics I’ve read I would actually kill a man for I love them so much
29. Do you download fic?
No, but seeing as my absolute favorite Bionicle fic vanished off the face of the earth several years ago and I cannot find anything about it an y wh ere sometimes I think about saving my faves. I never got to finish reading that fic and I am absolutely devastated every time I think about it.
30. Tell me something else about your fic reading! Anything else!
best thing is when my friend and I buddy read a fic and send each other our favorite parts
Tag!
@yaelathewordsmith and @samantha-girlscout ♡ ♡ ♡
#Toa does a meme#long post#i didn't forget about this i've just been picking at it ever since u tagged me
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Of Significant Figures
→ summary: It’s funny how no matter what you think of, it always comes down to Kim Namjoon. You’re literally head over heels WHIPPED for him. Just one tiny problem though. What do the numbers above his head mean???
→ pairing/rating: namjoon x reader | PG-15
→ genre: basically a whole load of fluff and crack before it all goes down to some angst | est. relationship!au
→ warnings: gun violence, death, brief mentions of suicide, suggestive dialogue
→ wordcount: 3.3k
→ a/n: idk the title gave me chem flashbacks and i CRINGED but it is what it is
♫: Learn to Love by Hwan Chi Yeol | Fine by Jung Seung Hwan
You’re not exactly a connoisseur of numbers. Yeah, you’re okay at mathematics — you didn’t have too much trouble in medical school either. But why the fuck does it have to be you?
Why do you have to see these… these numbers? Damn straight. You see numbers above people’s heads. Sure you’ve seen that shit happen in books, movies, iNtErNet nOveLs (cough guilty pleasure fanfictions) but the stories those main characters harbored… it wasn’t anything like what you’ve experienced.
For one, those characters actually know what the numbers above people’s heads mean. And it’s usually something like how many days someone has left to live, or how much money they have or make. Second of all, those characters care too much about those insignificant numbers — in fact, the whole plot of their existence revolves around the fact that they see figures that others cannot.
It’s totally different for you. You don’t know what the numbers mean. You have no idea why the numbers never go over two hundred or are never under zero. You don’t even understand why the numbers always increase.
But sometimes things are to be left a mystery. The numbers didn’t stop you from graduating med school. They didn’t stop you from getting a job. They didn’t stop you from getting a boyfriend that you know you’re going to marry soon. They didn’t stop you from living.
Honestly, you think you’d be content dying without knowing what the numbers mean. Besides, it’s not like you’re too concerned with it — you can’t even see your own number. Yet your boyfriend has different thoughts.
“Y/N, you should figure it out,” Namjoon says, taking a sip of his morning coffee as he adjusts his black-rimmed glasses.
“But I’ve tried,” you protest, huffing as you cross your arms over your chest. “I’ve tried for years, Joonie. And I can never seem to understand it.”
“Don’t you have a general idea about it, love?” he asks, resting his chin on his hand as he stares at you with twinkling eyes. “You’re a successful doctor, honey. You can figure anything out.”
You smile softly. “I wish, baby… But it’s much harder than you think. I thought they were lucky numbers at first, seeing how there’s literally no correlation between them and the person… But then the numbers always increase, so I had to rule that thought out.” You roll your eyes. “If the universe was going to give me such an ability like this, I wonder why they didn’t bother to tell me what it even meant.”
Namjoon laughs, his cheeks dipping in to reveal his lovable dimples. “We’ll figure it out, love. Besides, if the numbers increase, that only means it’s indicating the number of times someone has done something.”
You wiggle your eyebrows. “Done what?”
“Oh, I dunno.” He grins. “Maybe... Make love,” your boyfriend whispers, leaning across the cafe table to give you an ironic chaste kiss on your lips.
You roll your eyes, giggling lightly. "How greasy," you mutter, all the while tugging at the collar of your turtleneck because despite your feign of interest, woo! it was getting hot in there. “But it can’t possibly be that. I’ve seen children with numbers above their head. They do have figures but it’s just always significantly less than adults.”
Namjoon hums, brows furrowing as he thinks. “Didn’t you say my number’s relatively high?”
“Yeah, Joonie, yours is one of the highest I know. It’s 112 right now but it was 107 last week,” you say, scrunching your brows. “What have you been doing to raise those numbers, babe?”
Your boyfriend chuckles. “Maybe it’s the number of times I’ve wooed you. Plausible, huh?”
You pout slightly, puffing out your lips. “I think your number would’ve gone down if that was the case,” you say in your teasing voice.
Joonie laughs out loud, giving you a knowing look. “You know you love me.”
“More than the world,” you answer without a beat.
Namjoon smiles, taking another sip of his coffee. It’s silent for a while as both of you take in the morning sun’s rays at your favorite coffee shop. You’re absentmindedly admiring every little feature on your boyfriend’s face as he does the same to you.
“I didn’t want to break the silence but…” Namjoon sighs, “just to end things on a positive note, we’re going to figure it out. I know we are.”
You nod, smiling lovingly at your boyfriend.
But you highly doubt his statement.
The glowing white numbers above people’s heads are hardly annoying. They’re just something you know you have to live with. Besides, it’s fun to make theories about what they are. Especially with your slightly inappropriate best friend.
“What if they’re the number of times someone masturbates?” your best friend snorts, slapping his thighs as he laughs out loud.
“Oh, c’mon, Jimin, you’re disgusting,” you laugh. “I’ve seen seven-year-olds with 3’s and 4’s above their heads. And besides, I’ve told you over a hundred times; your number’s a solid 12. I don’t exactly believe that you’ve only masturbated 12 times in your whole life. You’re a horny bitch —”
“Point taken,” he snorts, raising up his hands in defense. “But it would also make sense why Namjoon’s number is so fucking big. I swear to god if someone masturbates more than me, it’s probably hi —”
“Oh shut up, I’m THIS close to unfriending you right now,” you giggle, rolling your eyes. “What are you? A teenager? Act your age, please.”
“As if you act like a doctor. I would rather die than get your treatment, Dr. Y/N.”
“I called you over so we can theorize, not banter back and forth like a couple of prepubescent teens,” you sigh. “Anything else?”
“Well, on a more serious approach, has my number changed in the last few months?” Jimin asks, face set in a stern look which meant he was finally starting to become serious.
“No. Your number’s been 12 for years now — one of the smallest numbers I’ve seen,” you say. “What are you not doing to maintain that?”
“To be honest, not much,” Jimin snorts. “I’m an unemployed useless piece of trash.”
“C’mon, don’t say that,” you say, frowning. “We all know you should’ve ended up better.”
“I dunno, Y/N,” he sighs. “I barely get out of the house, you know? Today’s the first day in a week I’ve even left the apartment.”
“Oh, Minnie,” you say, reaching over the dinner table to place your hand on top of his. “You can always ask for help, you know. I’d love to hire you anytime.”
Jimin shakes his head, a shit-eating grin replacing his worried frown. “You know I’m not professional enough to save lives. Appreciate the offer though, doctor.” Your best friend does a mock salute that makes you giggle. “Anyway, how’s Namjoon? Has his number been skyrocketing these days too?”
“He’s okay, I think. He doesn’t like to show that he’s stressed but he’s a fucking prosecutor, Jimin. He probably gets more stressed out than you and I do combined. I don’t know if it correlates with his increasing number,” you hum thoughtfully. “I really wonder what it is…”
Jimin pushes his hair back with his hand, giving you a worried look. “I’m not saying it is definitely this… but what if it’s the number of times he’s thought of committing suicide?”
You almost spit out your water in shock. “Namjoon and suicide don’t go together,” you snap, making Jimin flinch in his seat. He lowers his head, staring at his shoes as if he were the guiltiest person in the world. “Sorry… I —” you sigh, massaging your forehead. “You know we trust each other as if our lives depend on it. We tell each other everything. Meaning, he would tell me if he thought of… such things.”’
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have said that,” Jimin says, shaking his head. “It was never a possibility anyway.”
“It’s fine, it’s fine,” you murmur.
The once happy mood is replaced with graveness as you and Jimin both look down at your laps, unsure of what to say next.
“Hey… you’re going to marry him, right?” Jimin asks, fiddling with his metals rings wrapped around his fingers. He refuses to make eye contact with you.
You nod. “Yeah… He’s going to propose soon. Once our jobs settle down though. I think Joonie’s in the middle of a particularly hard case. I mean, we haven’t been able to see each other’s faces in a while.”
“Ah…” Jimin says absentmindedly. “Well, if that’s the case, want a ticket?”
“A what?”
“A ticket for a concert. The one you’ve always wanted to go to? TXT or something? I just had one rolling around in my crummy little apartment so I thought I’d just give it to someone who’d actually go…” He smiles at you, handing you a firm, rectangular ticket that, sure enough, had your favorite band’s name scrawled across it.
“God, Jimin!” you shriek, putting a hand over your mouth to muffle the scream you just about had coming. “Why did you only buy one? We could’ve totally gone together! HOLY SHIT!” you yell. “AND IT’S ONLY IN A MONTH. WHAT AM I GOING TO WEAR? OH FUCK — I BETTER TRY TO CLEAR OUT THE SCHEDULE FOR THAT DAY!”
Jimin chuckles at your teenager-like excitement, laying back in his seat as he watches you fangirl over a ticket. He knows you’re right. He totally could’ve presented two tickets to you — one for you, one for him. But he couldn’t bring himself to. The second ticket sits heavily in the pocket of his jeans.
You belong with Namjoon. You deserve each other. He will only ever be a best friend to you.
And while Jimin’s thinking such thoughts, you’re too distracted to even realize the 12 that had hovered over his head for years had morphed into a brightly glowing 13.
“Babe, is work okay?” you say in your worried voice, wrapping your arms around Namjoon from the back.
“I’ll have to ask the same thing to you,” your boyfriend chuckles, whirling around to press his lips to your forehead.
You huff. “You’ve lost weight, Joonie — I know how stressful this case is for you. Besides, you can’t just deflect my question with another question.”
“I’m fine, Y/N,” he coos, cupping your cheek to leave a fleeting kiss on your lips.
“Are you really?” you mutter, hugging his waist, bringing him closer to you. His warmth, his feeling, his smell — it’s all so welcoming that you want to stay like this forever.
“Completely,” Namjoon answers, kissing the top of your head before wrapping his lean arms around you as if he was protecting you from all the harm in the world. “I love you, Y/N. I’d never keep anything from you.”
You hum into his chest, a small smile spreading over your lips. “Me too. I love you too,” you whisper.
The first thing you notice when your boyfriend comes home from work is the white, glowing number above his head. It’s not it’s usual 112. Now it’s 119 to be exact. It’s only after your eyes leave the sparkling number is when you realize Namjoon’s grinning so widely it looks like half of his face is his smile — the rest drowning in his adorable dimples.
“Work went well?” you say, stretching from the couch. “I feel so unproductive now,” you joke.
“Aw, don’t say that love,” Namjoon soothes you, moving over to cuddle with you on the couch. “It was your day off, anyways. You should be resting.”
You smile, nuzzling your face into his chest. “Did the case end well? It did, I assume.”
Namjoon softly runs his fingers through your hair, holding you in his warm arms as he nods happily. “They’re convicted,” he sighs. “Guilty from the start — don’t know what their lawyer was trying to prove.” He grunts, giving you an apologetic smile. “Sorry, work stuff is tedious. I shouldn’t bore you with that.”
“Honestly, I can even listen to you talking about monkey-shit for ages,” you giggle, reaching out for his hand.
“Maybe I’ll research that just to test it out,” Namjoon jokes, encompassing your hand with his. “Anything new with the numbers?”
“Yours went up today. 112 to 119,” you murmur, shrugging the question off.
Namjoon frowns, shifting in his position to look at you with worried eyes.
“What’s wrong?” you inquire, worry lines stretching across your forehead. “Think it’s got something to do with the case?”
“If it went up today, then yes,” he answers, squeezing your hand. “Lemme try to think what I’ve done seven times today…”
Although you’d rather have him not obsess too much about something of the unknown, you leave him be.
“All I can think of is going to the restroom seven times,” Namjoon sulks, tugging you tight into his chest. “Bullcrap. Didn’t you say Jimin’s only got 12 as his number? No way in hell he’s pissed only a dozen times in thirty years.”
You giggle. “I think the real question is, why are you urinating so often? The day’s not even halfway over and you’ve peed seven times, Joonie. Maybe I should check up your bladder.”
Your boyfriend huffs cutely. “I just had a lot of coffee, Y/N. That’s not the focus, here. We really need to figure out what the damn numbers mean! What if they mean something important? What if knowing what they mean can unlock something advantageous for you?”
“Alright, I know, I know, Joon…”
But at this point in your life, you want to focus on everything but the numbers. Maybe you were given this ability without knowing its meaning, its potentials because it was intentional. Maybe you weren’t supposed to know.
You’d very much like to keep it that way.
“Are you sure you’re fine going alone?” Namjoon asks for the hundredth time as you slip on your comfy sneakers.
“Yes, yes,” you say, swinging your backpack over your shoulder. “It’s just a concert. Besides, I’ll be around a lot of people — probably screaming little teenage girls but… anything to see my favorite band, right?”
Namjoon smiles, walking over to hug you tight. “Too bad the ticket next to yours was bought or else I would’ve gone with you,” he mumbles against your neck.
“To what? See me fangirl over some sweaty males?” you giggle.
“I’d go just to watch you,” Namjoon responds without missing a beat.
“Aw, I love you, you know that?” you mutter, pulling away from the hug to leave a platonic kiss on his lips.
“I know, Y/N. I love you too.” He grins as you open the front door, waving as you start to walk out. “Have fun! Stay safe, love!’
You wave right back, smiling widely at the love of your life before the door blocks your view. The last thing you had seen had not been Namjoon’s face but the glowing 120 above his head.
It’d gone up again.
The concert takes your breath away. The songs, the dances, the chants crowd. Everything had fit your imagination and more.
Many of your friends and family members tell you that you have the vocation to be a doctor — but they don’t believe fangirling over younger boys is one of the reasons. In your defense, it’s not like you would want to date the members, you’re just a very… avid fan of their songs.
When no one’s around in your office, you like to blast their music, singing along with them as you complete your charts or do some internet research of a symptom your patient insisted they had.
Once you even forced Namjoon to learn a part of their hardest choreographies — more for a good laugh and not a good show.
You smile at the memory, clutching the strap of your backpack as you follow the crowd out of the booming stadium. It’s funny how no matter what you think of, it always comes down to Kim Namjoon.
The venue is bustling with squealing fans and last-minute merchandise stands. There is an overload of glowing numbers that usually would’ve hurt your head, but you’re too energized from the concert to care. You quickly fish out your phone to text Namjoon that the performance’s finished. He’d insisted he picked you up, feeling bad he hadn’t been able to take you to the stadium — even though it was almost a two-hour drive from the house.
[LOVE♥]: I’m here, baby. Just waiting for you. Text me where you are when it’s over so I can drive to you! Did you have fun? Were they as amazing in real life as well? Or am I still better??
[LOVE♥]:
───▄▄▄▄▄▄─────▄▄▄▄▄▄ ─▄█▓▓▓▓▓▓█▄─▄█▓▓▓▓▓▓█▄ ▐█▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓█▓▓▒▒▒▒▒▓▓█▌ █▓▓▒▒░╔╗╔═╦═╦═╦═╗░▒▒▓▓█ █▓▓▒▒░║╠╣╬╠╗║╔╣╩╣░▒▒▓▓█ ▐█▓▓▒▒╚═╩═╝╚═╝╚═╝▒▒▓▓█▌ ─▀█▓▓▒▒░░░░░░░░░▒▒▓▓█▀ ───▀█▓▓▒▒░░░░░▒▒▓▓█▀ ─────▀█▓▓▒▒░▒▒▓▓█▀ ──────▀█▓▓▒▓▓█▀ ────────▀█▓█▀ ──────────▀
[LOVE♥]: What do you think of this? Spent an hour waiting for you to type it out. Do you like it?
You stifle a giggle, about to text back something cute when you hear a loud bang! Your head jerks up at the sound, ears still ringing. Then there’s another bang! And another. Then screams.
Someone nearly knocks your phone out of your hand as they push past you. You’re too shocked to comprehend what’s going on. It’s almost in slow motion as you look around to see fans letting out blood-curdling screams. It’s chaotic.
Pushing and running and falling and trampling. Numbers are increasing like crazy: 20’s becoming 30’s, 40’s becoming 50’s, 60’s to 70’s. You’ve never seen this kind of utter pandemonium in your life. Your head hurts from the white numbers blinding your vision; you can barely make out what’s happening.
Why are the numbers increasing? Who are they running from? What are the loud noises?
But you manage to see something out of ordinary, there, a good distance from you, someone in all black, holding a fucking gun that everyone seemed to be fleeing from. You can barely make out any of his features — all except the glowing number over his head. 88. Bang! Then 89. Bang! 90. Bang! Bang! Bang! 91, 92, 93.
The numbers are getting larger — literally, he’s coming towards you.
You’re shaking, feet cemented to the concrete, legs frozen beyond movement. You’d just had an epiphany. You didn’t think you’d finally learn what the numbers meant after all these years… like this.
Thirty years worth of memories flies right by your eyes. Everything clicks in place. Everything.
Your blood runs ice cold and the raucous sound of gunshots painfully pierce through your ear. Your heart beats in your head and you’re starting to hear a high-pitched ringing. You’re not scared of dying. You’re not scared of being shot (though at the moment, you might not even be thinking straight).
You’re scared of Kim Namjoon. Absolutely petrified.
120
His phantom number crowds your vision and you feel faint, betrayed, wronged.
120
You trusted him.
1
You loved him.
2
Now you’re terror-stricken.
0.
Deceived.
BANG!
It doesn’t even hurt when you fall hard on the ground, clutching your wounded side. It does get harder to breathe as you can barely make out a glowing 99 of your killer’s become a perfect 100.
Nice to know I’m his hundredth kill.
You’re filled with anger, bitterness, regret. But most of all, confusion. It doesn’t make sense. 120′s too much. Namjoon would never. Kim Namjoon wouldn’t hurt a fruit fly. Would he?
You were right. Even with your last breath, everything you think of comes down to him.
a/n: there are a lot of ways to interpret this ending – no idea is wrong! but to know what i meant/believe happened, click here!
masterlist
#kim namjoon#kim namjoon fanfiction#namjoon fanfiction#rm fanfic#namjoon fluff#namjoon angst#namjoon crack#seeing numbers au#namjoon#of significant figures#osf
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I watch horror movies for fun. I find a lot of enjoyment in movies where the main focus is a group of often-innocent people being killed. I can also find entertainment from movies where people are slowly broken down, where the psychological aspects of horror are played with— one of my favorite films is the Bill Paxton-directed 2001 psychological thriller/horror film titled Frailty. It’s a movie that deserves much more attention than it got.
I use Bill Paxton in particular here as a way to bridge into my main topic, the worst fucking movie I’ve ever seen in my life. I just rewatched the 1992 movie The Vagrant, starring Bill Paxton, and I had near-completely blocked it from my mind. As soon as the opening music started, an indescribable rage seethed through me. I saw red. I almost called off our scheduled movie night, insisting that we switch to something enjoyable. I didn’t. That was a mistake.
For those of you who don’t know, and I’m not expecting many of you to, The Vagrant is a movie about the psychological breakdown of a man who has just purchased a new house, and is understandably stressed about the life-changing step forward in adult life. This breakdown is orchestrated by a psychologist(?) who theorizes about the way he could destroy someone’s life, using Graham (Bill Paxton) as a guinea pig. It is described as a “horror comedy.” It is not a funny movie in the slightest. Every attempt at humor The Vagrant made fell completely flat; in one of my preview posts I noted that it attempts to pass an assault scene off as funny. The movie does this twice. It doesn’t succeed either time.
There is a grand total of two tolerable characters in the movie; Graham, Bill Paxton’s character, and Graham’s friend Chuck (the only one to believe that a vagrant has been breaking into Graham’s house). X-Ray is also fine, but he’s there for a grand total of two short scenes before he is killed. Every other character on screen achieves varying levels of completely unlikable, rage-inducing bullshit. Just attempting to put this down into a post makes me want to rip my hair out, I can’t possibly describe the bone-deep disgust this movie makes me feel. This is the reason I don’t normally talk about movies I don’t enjoy— because it’s so difficult to put to words exactly why I’m frustrated. I feel like Ms. White in the movie Clue, sitting here rambling at you all: “Flames, flames on the sides of my face, breathing, heaving breaths.” I just can’t get it out coherently; there’s nothing beneficial about this movie, nothing enjoyable. Even Bill Paxton, who I normally adore in his roles, does nothing for this movie.
The fact that The Vagrant attempted to pass off two assault scenes as funny, and a traumatized man being triggered as scary... I feel like I’m running a risk of damaging my keyboard I’m typing so aggressively. My fingers hurt. I am genuinely angry. I talked about My Bloody Valentine 3D and its awful portrayal of mental illness as scary— The Vagrant is its cousin in “we think triggers are scary, and no sane person could possibly be traumatized by having their ENTIRE LIFE destroyed in a stranger’s fucked up science experiment.” No, that would be ridiculous. How could any upright American man POSSIBLY develop a trigger based off of a sound he consistently heard when the vagrant BROKE INTO HIS HOME and did things like DESTROY HIS BELONGINGS AND URINATE IN HIS FUCKING BLENDER. SOMEHOW this is supposed to be funny. Somehow, a man confessing to his friend that he is scared shitless because of a stranger invading a place that is supposed to be safe is meant to be funny, and not upsetting. Somehow, the death of said traumatized man’s mother, the mistreatment of her corpse in front of him, is supposed to be funny. SOMEHOW, the TWO ENTIRELY SEPARATE ATTEMPTED ASSAULTS are supposed to be FUNNY, all because it’s a man being assaulted. I am fucking SEETHING right now, I can’t imagine in what world this movie is a fucking comedy. I can’t. There is no part of The Vagrant I can remotely STAND, even Bill Paxton. Nothing about this movie is good, and by god it deserves to be forgotten in the annals of other early nineties shit.
My keyboard’s taken a bad enough beating just from me typing this short piece out. Fuck The Vagrant; watch other Bill Paxton movies. He’s done plenty of excellent genre pieces, and plenty of schlocky ones too. Watch Monolith (1993) instead. Watch Near Dark, watch Aliens, fuck, even watch The Dark Backward (1991) if you want some hot bullshit that’s weird enough to be entertaining and actually has an interesting visual style.
There’s nothing good about The Vagrant.
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A yamishipping stuffing and chub idea?
This ended up equal parts kink and... idk if I’d call it plot, exactly, but exploration, I guess? More Mariku/Atem than anything, but a bit of Mariku/Bakura too.
Wordcount: 1448 (yeah it ended kind of long for these)
Warnings: Very brief emeto warning, like half a sentence.
Having yourown body after ages of sharing one was an… interestingsensation. Atem had been overwhelmed with pain during the memory world game, andhad been too focused on the duel when he faced off against his partner. Marikuhad always had Marik’s consciousness humming at the back of his mind, even oncehe’d gained control. Bakura had… well, honestly, Ryou’s body felt like he was apuppeteer, with little more than the barest of physical sensations.
So when they’dbeen brought back, everything rushed in at once. Hunger, thirst, wind againsttheir faces and clothes against their backs.
They’d beendrawn back by Ryou. He’d been trying to summon something else, but Bakura hadbeen too closely intertwined with him for too long, and the gods had beenlooking for a chance to give Atem a few more years of the life he was denied.
Nobody wasreally sure why Mariku was there. Perhaps the dissolving of the shadow’ssentience left him nowhere to go.
The onething they shared, though, was a deep, almost painful hunger. Ryou theorizedthat these bodies had never eaten, and all three of them had the metabolism of teenage boys- not a good combination.
Ryou had saidthat he would call Yugi in the morning, but had laid out some clothes (toolarge for Atem, too small for Mariku, and even though they would have fitBakura he insisted on remaining in his robes) and ordered plenty of takeout. “Idon’t know how much you’d need, so we can just save whatever you don’t eat.”
Ryou was currentlysitting on the couch, poring over a spell book, Atem had settled down at thetable, and Bakura and Mariku were arguing over a bowl of pork noodles.
“There’senough for all of us.” Atem murmured, but both turned to glare daggers at him. “Iknow you’re hungry, I am too, but there’s no need to fight.”
“You knowwhat? You’re actually right.” Mariku moved over to a box of cupcakes, thendrizzled soy sauce over them and dropped a few noodles on.
Atem lookedlike he was about to be sick when Mariku stuffed it in his mouth in one bite.He turned to his own plate, which had a generous helping of chicken and rice, focusingon the sweet smell.
Within a fewminutes, all three of them had dropped the tension and focused on eating.Mariku made bizarre combinations, often of sweets with meat, Bakura rippedthrough everything like he was a wild dog, and Atem had eventually stoppedtrying to pick what he remembered from when he’d watched Yugi eat and hadstarted eating anything within reach. Noodles, fish, meatballs, containers ofpie and pastries… the table was roughly divided at first, but within half anhour they were all reaching for whatever they wanted most at the moment. Mariku’s face and cheekswere covered in sauce and frosting, and he often grabbed food off of Bakura’splate just to annoy him. Bakura retaliated by harshly shoving something inMariku’s mouth that puffed his cheek up like a chipmunk’s.
After an hour, the table had been cleared, and Ryou had stoppedlooking for answers and started looking at them.Right now, they weren’t a pharaoh, a thief king, and a monster of shadows, theywere three teenagers who had cleared a feast in less time than it took to watcha movie. The other two had shirts on, but Bakura’s belly bulge was easy to seewhen he stretched up his arms.
“Wow…” Ryou murmured, half in awe.
Bakura burped, thumping his chest. “Have any more?”
Ryou raised an eyebrow. “That was enough for six people.” Hesighed. “I’ll go shopping tomorrow.” He pulled from the fridge a half-strippedham, a carton of ice cream, and a few waffles he popped in the microwave.Bakura claimed the ham, and Mariku the ice cream, which left the waffles for Atem.
As he waited, he set a hand on his stomach. He knew Yugi hada bit of meat on his bones, although the thick leather usually hid it, and itmeant his new body felt unusually lean. That is, except for the small potbellythat pushed the fabric of his tunic out. Curious, he pressed his fingers down,pushing a hiccup out from his lips.
It… made sense, he supposed. If they really had never eatenin these bodies, any food would show immediately. And they’d had plenty. Bakurawas ripping the meat off the ham like he hadn’t eaten in 3,000 years, andMariku was starting to turn an odd color even as he continued to eat. Atem himselfhad cleared what felt like half a dozen kilos and then some, but his stomachstill gnawed with hunger.
When Ryou set the waffles down, he tore into them with justa fork, stuffing them into his mouth. Ryou crossed his arms.
“Guess I don’t need to get the syrup out, then.” Atem had half-finishedthe first waffle in less than fifteen seconds, even after everything he’d alreadyeaten. “Maybe your stomachs are all portals to the shadows and you’ll just eatright through all my pocket money.”
“I’d rather not intrude.” Atem set a hand on the back of hischair, standing up on wobbly legs. “You can call Yugi now, I wouldn’t want to botherhim, but I’m sure he’d-“
“Yugi can wait until the morning. For all I know you’lldisappear by then, and I’d rather not get his hopes up. Besides, Malik… he’sgotten better. I doubt he’d want to see his other half.”
“I don’t want to see him either!” Mariku shouted, beforeleaning forward and gagging into the now-empty ice cream carton.
“And I can deal with himfor now.” Ryou nodded at Bakura. “I’m sure it took a lot of energy to get full bodies,so eat as much as you need to. I’ll order more.” He headed for his bedroom,presumably to call for takeout without the noises of three arguing spirits.
Atem glanced at Ryou’s back, then the door, then finally thetable again. It seemed no matter how much he ate, he never quite got full, but he could at least finish what he started.
He ate the waffles, then walked over to the couch, collapsingon it. Mariku followed shortly, plopping down next to him. He tugged his shirtup and off, fumbling with his cape for a moment before getting it off too. Hehad a similar small belly to Atem’s- although Atem was slightly horrified tosee nearly-visible ribs above it.
“Do you still want to kill me?” The question slipped outbefore Atem could fully register it, but Mariku just laughed.
“I have no clue! When the shadows got wiped….” He set twofingers against the side of his head, then flicked them up, miming a gun goingoff. “I don’t know what of me is left. That’s mostly what I was made of, so whoknows what I am now?
That was… strangely candid. Atem turned to Bakura, still atthe table. Bloody juice had smeared his chest and swollen stomach. “What about-“
“If you finish that sentence, I might just do it, so I wouldn’t.”Bakura said sourly, and Atem looked down.
“…Fair enough.” He returned to prodding at his stomach. Hewanted to tug up the tunic, but didn’t feel any underwear beneath it and wasn’tabout to go nude in front of those two. The food inside was tightly packed, andafter poking an air pocket, a burp bubbled up. Mariku grinned, leaning forwardsto press his hands against Atem’s bloated belly, which got another belch beforeAtem slapped a hand to his mouth. Mariku laughed at that.
“You’re human. Better to accept it than pretend you’re stillgod-king.” He kept kneading at the flesh through the fabric, and even though heoccasionally dug his fingernails in, Atem found it was… almost nice. Niceenough that he didn’t mind his eyes were starting to… starting to… droop…
Ryou re-entered the room to find Bakura picking his teethlazily while Mariku and Atem were slumped over each other. “I don’t know if itwas a food coma or they’re dead.” He said, and Ryou hurried over to checkbefore he saw they were both breathing.
“…It’s probably just strain from coming back.” Ryoumurmured. He looked up when he heard a thud- Bakura’s head had hit the table aswell. He couldn’t help a soft smile as he lifted the former spirit up and droppedhim on the couch, taking several pictures.
Wouldn’t that be awakeup call to Yugi tomorrow morning.
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Dude, tell us more about Slender Man!! If even you think it's irredeemably bad, I need to know more!
Where to fucking start…Don’t see it, first word of advice. I work at a movie theater so I get the tickets for free, but even then this did not feel worth it. I don’t think there was ever a time in my life I sat in a theater so bored and miserable at the same time. Sure The 15:17 to Paris is dull as fuck, but at least some of the bad acting was enjoyable (not to be a dick but… it was kinda funny at Parts), the finale is genuinely excellent, and above all else it had a lot of heart. But my God does Slender Man make The 15:17 to Paris seem like a watchable film in comparison. Believe it or not I do (kind of) have something positive to say about Slender Man in regards to its cinematography. Some of the lighting and shot composition is genuinely beautiful, there’s a wonderful sense of atmosphere set up in earlier scenes that I honestly would have loved had they accompanied a better movie. Truth be told though, I’m not so sure I can even say the cinematography is “good” overall at the end of the day, because there are WAY too many instances of ugly close ups, artificial lighting in settings that don’t feel lifelike, and terribly goofy camera movements that attempt to be “scary” and “jarring” that end up being comical at best. Footage being passed off as “found iPhone videos” look like they were shot in crisp 4K, Unsane doesn’t look that good and it was actually shot on an IPhone!!!!! Have these filmmakers even considered the fact that maybe making your found footage look imperfect and hard to decipher, like an actual iPhone would produce at midnight in the middle of a forest, would end up making these segments SCARIER??? These motherfuckers are actually spending more money on something LESS FRIGHTENING! The incompetency this movie boasts in its knowledge on modern day technology puts Unfriended: Dark Web to shame, and that was the focal point of that movie! I have very little to say about the characters because the film offered me no characters to really talk about. Any sort of depth or intrigue to their personalities are told to us rather than shown in any sort of compelling way, and I theorize this is due in part to the major editing that had to be done on this previously gorey movie. Not to say the uncut version of this piece of shit would be… well… good, but it certainly could have been a less painful experience. Gotti is a movie that could be made decent through major editing and a couple of reshoots, Slender Man would just have to be scrapped and remade entirely to ever hope to be a 5/10. So yeah, long story short there are no characters, and thus no one to be afraid for, nor anyone to emotionally latch on to for any sort of investment. But who needs that, right? Slender Man relies on the same cheap jump scare techniques most modern day horror movies do, though admittedly less so (substituting nothing in its place, as Jay Bauman of Red Letter Media points out) but there is a difference. In movies like The Haunting in Connecticut or Wish Upon, generic spooky images accompanied by a stock loud sound manages to be… startling and unexpected, it does manage to get to you even if it’s incredibly cheap, easy, and not very scary. Slender Man doesn’t even achieve that. I mean… wow. Youtubers with access to Windows Moviemaker and no knowledge on editing have done better, in fact they FREQUENTLY do better. It’s a sad sad day when The Scary Maze Game is a more excellent practice in horror than a theatrically released film, yet here we are. I’ve had a long history of watching horror movies I never found scary in the least. Most of the time I find this in movies that are so bad they’re good, or just much older and outdated in their scares. Modern day horror films at least manage to have a startling moment or two, something uncomfortable, or something unnerving, even if it’s for a brief second, even if it’s a 1/10 piece of shit, I always find SOMETHING that feels like it would work for somebody. But honest to God if Slender Man isn’t one of the least scariest horror movies I’ve ever seen, I was not moved by ANYTHING in this fucking movie, not one God Damn thing. The presence of Slender Man himself and his mythology is so underwhelming, handled with such little care and so little attention that I felt like I was watching a fan film. Something that made the urban legend (a series of photoshopped pictures that spooked the internet for a whole 2 week’s or something like that) so frightening is that he was hidden in photos, you had to really look for this mysterious figure, and once you did you couldn’t unsee it, and the entire picture was changed and made more frightening. It’s corny but hey, it’s kinda fun. This movie is in no way reminiscent of that kind of charm, nor is it anything like the computer game that popularized it. It just takes a generic horror movie, I don’t want to say plot so I’ll just say outline, and sort of kind of uses that as a vessel for Slender Man to, I don’t know, be scary? He kills some people sure, but half the time it feels more like he’s there to be menacing, for no other reason that the fact that he looks creepy and there’s a good 2 seconds of backstory about why he’s such a threat. He’s never cleverly hidden in the shadows, he doesn’t move in a uniquely creepy fashion, you’re never wondering whether or not he’s present and watching our characters every move, he’s either there or he’s not. The effects to bring this urban legend to life are truly atrocious as well, either utilizing cheap CGI or a plastic dummy that doesn’t move a whole lot. He moves like doctor octopus sometimes so… hey, that’s something, I guess. This dialogue is so dreadfully terrible, and delivered in such a dull and lifeless fashion that I was having Phantom Menace flashbacks. Gotti might as well have been written and directed by Quentin Tarantino when compared to this garbage. I’m honestly not kidding, that movie and Unfriended: Dark Web have better dialogue and more charisma in their presentation than this giant pile of cinematic trash, and those movies are awful too. There is no justifiable reason for our protagonists to take such an interest in this slender man mythology. Literally, the minute they hear about it they decide to go on some suspect website and partake in some sort of challenge to summon him. Why do they do this? I don’t know. It’d be one thing for this to be a popular urban legend floating around town, kind of like The Blair Witch, and them being interested in it for that reason, but no, these girls just do it because some hot guy at school talked about it once. The ending of this movie is so rushed, I’m talking Fant4stic levels of rushed. Characters experiencing new conflicts seem to just vanish or become irrelevant, incredibly key moments are shown in a matter of seconds, a minute tops. And some things feel like they happen ten times over, as if multiple scenes of the exact same idea needed to be communicated in this already bloated film, it’s very repetitive and in the ends leads to absolutely nothing. There are a couple of so-bad-they’re-good moments for sure. Some really cringe worthy lines of dialogue got a chuckle out of me. One moment in particularly where two teenagers are hooking up on a couch and the guy stands up, starts shaking his head and sticking out violently his tongue (because he’s possessed by Slender Man? Or the girl is imagining that he is?) had me laughing my ass off at the theater, I’ll be showing that to everyone because it was that funny and I guarantee 99% of people who see it will laugh too. But it’s not worth sitting through the whole movie to get there. Not even close. I would never make anybody sit through this terrible terrible film, I would feel guilty and ashamed of myself if I ever did such a thing. Ultimately the movie is bloodless, lacks any sort of emotional weight, is in no way scary, and feels like a flat and lifeless product. There’s really no other way for me to say it, I hate this movie, I truly have hate in my heart for this atrocious piece of garbage. I didn’t hate The 15:17 to Paris, I didn’t hate Unfriended: Dark Web, I didn’t hate Gotti. It takes a lot for me to hate a movie, even if it’s an absolute piece of trash I am not so quick to hate it just because it sucks. I have the utmost confidence in saying I hate Slender Man, I have no real desire to ever watch it again, and I would not in any way recommend it to anyone. Maybe if they release an unrated cut I’d be… sort of interested in checking it out to see if it’s even watchable, but that’s being pretty optimistic. This is inarguably the worst movie I’ve seen all year, and is without a doubt one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen in a theater. Fuck Slender Man and everything it stands for.
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