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binniesthighs · 4 years ago

Text

two tails | reader x minho |

Three

Pairing: self insert, female reader x lee minho

Genre: strangers to lovers, neighbors to lovers, fluff

Tags: neighbors au, comfort fic, catowner!minho, catowner!reader, author!reader, bestfriend!seungmin, floristnpunk!jisung, gradstudent!jeongin, agedup!skz, slow burn, plot driven, gradual romance, lil bit of angst, strained parental relationship, explicit language, mentions of food and alcohol, mentions of previous kinda sad relationships

Word count: 5.4k (y e e h a w)

Tagging: @lauraneuuh

Chapters

P | ONE | TWO | THREE | ?

zeal noun

: eagerness and ardent interest in the pursuit of something: fervor

₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎

Seungmin never liked your cooking, or at least, he’d often mumble this into his spoon while beginning his second serving. He was probably just being nice, or respectful. Your best friend of four years had never been less.

Aside from the fact the he had a 70 pound golden retriever, never had you once seen a strand of that golden hair cling to the cloth of his winter coats. In the autumn, he would drive you in his hand-me-down ‘91 Mitsubishi to the city where you would tutor the English students just so you wouldn’t have to bear the cold of the subway. In the summers he would toss soju down his throat with you, sitting on the carpet of your living room and turning his head to the side with a hand raised to hide his glass. In the spring, he would remember your birthday--several months before his--and take you to coffee shops and bookstores, then the grocery store (which he knew you hated) and would buy for you the most expensive beef he could find.

You would cook the meat for the two of you, and he would say that he liked it...even if you had charred it black on the edges.

Seungmin flicked at the little aluminum tab on his beer can while he watched you murder yet another plate of perfectly fine vegetables on your stovetop.

“At least it smells nice.” You flipped the circle of white onion.

“It does.” He returned, nonchalant, flicking the beer tab a little poink.

“You’re being uncharacteristically quiet. Too tired to complain about those dicks from the marketing team? They put you on a shitty pitch again didn’t they?”

“Every pitch is a shitty pitch there. God, you wouldn’t believe the kinds of slogans that they make me say sometimes. It’s humiliating.”

“Hey, you’re the one that took the pay raise over that job at that high school.”

“Well, you didn’t have rent staring you dead in the face and a dog that’s practically active and sentient enough to be a real child.” He slugged down a sip of his drink. “I’m a single father you know.”

“As if!” You choked out your laughter. “Since when did you turn into Hyunjin? You were never one for dramatics anyway.”

“Go get your vegetables, they’ll burn.” He nodded his head to the stove. The thing was, they were already burnt.

You salvaged what you could of the vegetables then placed them over your rice balls (not intended to be balls in the first place) and the chicken strips which had undoubtedly been seasoned just a little too much. You slid the ceramic bowl in front of him. At least it was steaming. That was a good sign.

Seungmin nodded a little in thanks, then let out a less than obvious sigh before taking his first bite.

“Spicy...but good.”

The way that his breath sounded thin made it convincing enough to you that it wasn’t just “spicy.”

He scrunched up his face in that adorably puppy-like way that you had long gotten used to.

“Really. Tell me. It isn’t the pitches. Don’t pretend like I can’t read you.”

Your best friend squeezed his eyes shut with a rather generous slug of his beer. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Whaaaat?” You whined a little while opening up your own can. “Oh my god. It’s that girl from the art division. She has a boyfriend doesn’t she? Dammit.”

“No.” Your friend drew the disdain in his eyes up to you from the chicken that had made his nose start to run. He wiped at it quickly.

“I hope it’s not my mother that’s getting to you. She’s too damn nosy for her own good and twice as cocky as she should be. Don’t listen to her. What did she tell you anyway?”

Seungmin poked at his food with his fork then twisted a crispy-tipped red pepper. “Have you talked to him again?”

“--Minho?”

You shied at the memory of meeting him on his morning run two days prior. He would go out at nearly 8:00 on the dot every morning, just when the sun started to peek into the dewy pink and blue mornings.

“You should put on a sweater if you’re going to get up this early for those plants of yours. Don’t want you catching a cold.”

“Yes.” You answered your friend. A tiny ache pinged at your chest--and it wasn’t the kind that felt all twisted. “He asked me to watch the meteor shower with him this weekend. I hope I can cook something edible for him.”

Seungmin’s knee bounced, “Aren’t you at least at little suspicious of him?”

“Suspicious? Why would I be?”

“You hardly even know anything about him, or where he came from, what he does for a living--”

“--Now you’re starting to sound like my mother Seung. Relax. Besides, sometimes it doesn’t take much to feel...comfortable around a person. I mean, look at us! Soju nights started like, three weeks after we met. And I do know where he works. He works for a company that makes windows; fancy ones.”

“Windows?” He cocked a brow.

“He did say that it was kind of boring...”

“I just--” Your friend sighed out, resting anxious hands on his knees. Here he was again, being nice and respectful, like always. “--You could get hurt if you’re not careful.”

“What?”

“I’m saying, don’t get your hopes up.”

“Geez Seung...” Your voice trailed off with a different pain in your chest. This was the kind that twisted.

His expression softened, and he lent a hand to your shoulder, lingering, squeezing lightly. “Your mom...she told me to look after you...not like I do that already with you falling all over yourself and burning things...I don’t want to see you get hurt.”

“Hm. Thanks.”

“You’re also miserable to deal with when you’re sad. You make me blow my grocery budget with how much frickin’ ice cream and freezer tater tots you force me to get.”

“You like those tater tots too though.”

₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎

Bomi purred in your lap swaddled into a little ball of white, orange, black and brown. She was napping, or rather, trying to nap with the way that her little cat-shaped eyes blinked slowly. You tried your best to soak every little moment of it up: you knew that with her, it would be fleeting. There was something supremely calming about being close to your little furball like this. After all the love that you poured over her in the form of useless cat toys and new cat food every week, this somehow made it all worth it.

You tapped lightly at your keyboard, not too harshly, just lightly enough so that you wouldn’t startle your sleeping cat. The tips of your toes were cold, but you didn’t dare to move to grab a blanket to ruin the moment. Outside, a light spring rain befell on your small cement patio. Droplets of the warm showers patted at the roof of your home softly.

Your eyes had grown tired and dry at this late hour, but the end of the chapter was near. One more time you hovered your mouse over the little notification bar, clicking at it for that one last push of motivation:

Bomi needs to quit MESSING AROUND. Blaze is right in front of her!!! Ahhhh I want them to get together soooo bad

Is Herbie okay?? Poor bb, its so cute how we would do anything for Bomi.

Bomi:

Blaze:

*now kiss*

Are we really getting to the end of Book 1??? This has been such an amazing story N/n, I always look forward to your updates <3 they make my Thursdays hehe

I can feel like something big and bad is coming...oh no...I hope that Blaze and Bomi make it through

A thankful little chuckle hummed on your lips, then you pressed enter to start a new paragraph.

“Oh Bomi,” You exhaled, “If only Blaze knew how you felt too.”

Chapter 27

...The group journeyed through the cavern with flickering white flames dancing and casting shadows on the stone walls dripping in stalactites. Bomi held on to the hilt of her sword tighter with a sense of dread creeping up her throat. Blaze looked onward, much as he had been doing these days.

His leg was wrapped in a bloodied bandage: a reminder of the battle won against the Boar in Hilgram. He had jumped in front of her as he had countless times before.

“Hello??” Blaze’s voice echoed against the long and winding chambers of the cave. In his tone he was confident, but his shoulders still shook with an uncertainty.

Herbie’s little hedgehog feet patted the damp floor, and he looked up at his Princess with fear in his soft black eyes. The little velvet banner wrapped around his body had been torn and tattered from one too many battles.

Had it been darker, Bomi wondered if she had reached out for Blaze’s hand to find in him. She shook her head with her resolve, eyes painfully shut. It was only in the darkness that she allowed herself to want for him.

₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎

Today must be one of those spring-summer days.

Your warbled reflection chased after you in the blue glass of the university’s library windows. You had hoped that no one was on the other side watching you as you wrinkled up your nose to look like one of those devilish gargoyles that you had been writing of the night before. From the inside, rows and rows of books were lined up perfectly, however there were almost no students inside. It always did make you a little sad how few students would be there when you clocked in for your mandatory office hours.

Spring-summer days meant that the businesswomen on the sidewalks had exchanged with trousers with flowing skirts and little clicky ballet flats and each businessman had his tie and collar tugged down. There was a comforting warmth to the spring air that reminded you of your own college days when you and your friends--long gone now--had stayed up late to study, then would scour the buzzing streets for snacks. Things were much simplier then.

At the library’s entrance, budding tulips and geraniums of light purple hues were greeted by round bumblebees. Had the city not been as loud as it was, you could nearly hear the cicadas in the park on the east edge of the shining silver building.

You bowed slightly to the attendant at the desk who always would smile at you with adorable smiling eyes to match. She would often wear earrings of strange shapes that you had never seen before. She wore a lanyard too that had little cat paw prints decorating it; it was because of this you knew she was someone you could trust.

“Are you having a nice week?” You said to her customarily.

“Oh, I am. It’s always the same around here. My daughter will be having her baby soon! Sometimes I think that I’m more excited than she is.”

“You’ll have to tell me when that happens so I can bring her a gift, okay?”

The attendant smiled warmly, and nodded you off with a little oh, you don’t have to.

“Remember your key card this time?” She watched as you jingled around your own keys with the obsessive amount of plastic and silicon keychains.

You tsked. It seemed like nearly everyone in your life had now known how forgetful you tended to be sometimes.

“Yes. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be over there.”

Once more the two of you exchanged little bows and you made your way over to the back of the four storied library with the atrium of trees in between. There was a marble fountain encircled by the trees that had little oval shaped leaves. Two tiny birds, all black, bounced from branch to branch. It was your secret, but you had written about that fountain many times in your writing, but you were the only one who knew that it was real.

You tapped the reader to hear that familiar do-do doot along with the flash of the green lock. As always, the study room was a bit messy with eraser shavings sprinkled about and the odd dry marker laying next to the trashcan where someone had tried to toss it in, but had missed. The minute hand on the wall clock scooted right on to the 12.

“Are you busy?” That fluff on white hair peeked into your study room just like clockwork.

“For my favorite student? Do you even have to ask?”

Jeongin, the oldest and most attentive student in your class hopped in with his adorably boy-ish charm. Regardless of the fact that he was in the last year of his grad degree, it was impossible for him to look that old. You didn’t have the heart to tell him, but he technically shouldn’t have been in your class for undergrads, but you weren’t going to stop him.

“Why’d you decide to take this class anyway?” You would ask him.

He’d answer, “For fun.” with that cute little smile of his.

“I hope I’m not bothering you.”

“I just got here.” You pulled out a seat for him.

“Oh. Good. I was wondering if you could proof read my short story again. I’m having trouble with the ending. I just don’t think I understand all the way how to make it full circle like you said in lecture.”

He unzipped his leather backpack: obviously a gift from someone in his family that must have thought it would make him look his age. It didn’t. What didn’t help further was how he had adorned it with all kinds of keychains; much like your own keys. It was because of this that you knew he was someone you could trust.

His manuscript already had dozens of scribbles in his own handwriting with tons of question marks riddling the margins.

“Let me take a look.”

You skimmed the pages of the short story--one which you had already read the week prior--for all of his new edits. The notes made it a bit hard to read, but you were used to how he would make a mess of his papers now. He leaned in close to you with glossy eyes that might have even twinkled a little like a cartoon. Both of his knees bounced furiously while he watched you read, and would look from the paper, to your face, then back to the paper, then back to your face...

“Is-is it good? Better?”

Jeongin had written a love story. His first one that you had known of. It was about a boy and a girl who had met on an airplane, and had been seated together. The two of them found out that they had shared so much about their two lives without ever meeting until this very moment. They had realized they went to the same high school, worked in the same building, and were travelling for the same reason: to meet up with someone that they had once loved. It was beautiful, tragic, and in some ways, familiar.

“I think that it’s wonderful Jeongin. The edits that you made to it from last week really help with the narrative flow as well as the vertical plot. You’re really good at asking the deeper questions behind the piece like “why are they really there,” and “why is it important that they are there.” All you need to do is tie it up.”

“But howwww?” Jeongin slumped in his wheely chair. “What should I say?”

“Well...” You tapped your pen to your lip. “The ending scene is when they land at the airport right? Why don’t you have your main character say something that calls back to all of their similarities and makes it seem like they’ve known eachother all along?”

“But I don’t want it to seem like they’re going to forget eachother.”

“They won’t. You established that they’ve both found something different than what they were looking for in the first place.”

Your student’s face tangled up into concentrated knots and he puffed those thin strands of bleached white hair away from his eyes.

“I could say...‘see you at home’? Or...maybe that’s too cheesy--”

“--No it’s not! If you like it, I think that it also fits the story well. Its like, now they understand, and they’ve got something in eachother now that they hadn’t had before; also juxtaposing with your themes of travelling to make a reference to home.”

“Damn, you’re much better at this kind of stuff than I am...” Jeongin wrote down the new ending on his print out.

“Its just...what I like to do.”

“I’m glad I came.” He grinned out with his mischievous and trademark smile. “How’s your story going by the way? Almost finished?”

“Oh...”

A heat rose in your cheeks. You had decided to tell Jeongin about Princess Bomi a few weeks back, but you had neglected to tell him exactly what the story was about. That was a secret better kept to yourself.

“Its...good. I think. My readers seem to really like it.”

“Maybe you’ll let me read it someday. I bet there would be tons of other people who would like to read it too, you know, outside of the internet.”

“That’s what I’ve been told...” Hyunjin’s urgings echoed in your head. “Maybe...” Your eyes wandered to those scribblings of his. “How about we make a deal?”

“What kind of deal?”

“Once we get both of our stories sorted, lets submit them together. I’m sure people would like to read yours too.”

“Mine?!” Your adorable student’s face flushed as deeply pink as the sweater he wore. “Oh no, no no no no no.”

“I’m telling you it’s good! Its relatable, raw, well written. It never hurts to try. How about submitting it for the literary journal they do at the end of the semester?”

“You mean the one that all the arts majors read and fuckin’ eviscerate?? Hell no.”

“Hey, I could get eviscerated too by my chief editor.”

Jeongin gulped with his terrified, brown, cartoon-character glistening eyes boring holes into his manuscript.

You sang, “~Wanna go down together~?”

“A-as long as we’re going down together...I guess it’s worth a shot.”

“Alright then!!”

He made a little sound of disgust, then shoved his papers back into his much-too-old-for-him bag. “That was all I needed to ask you for. Thank you.” He bowed with respect. “I won’t be bothering you for too long today.”

“You wrote a good story Jeongin.”

“Mm. Thank you.” His smile turned into a tiny flustered line.

₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎

STUPID NEW CAT FOOD. AGAIN.

In one hand, you held the crinkled up grocery list with angry doodles of your cat folded into the corners of the page. You didn’t quite know if cats had eyebrows like the ones you had drawn onto your cat’s smug face, but you were for certain that this cat must’ve had them...and they were angry.

Bomi had selfishly decided at the end of your week that she no longer liked the last brand of cat food that you had found on the shelves of the grocery store. It was the brand stored next to the one that you had nearly concussed Minho with.

You were at your wits end. There must have been something wrong with your cat--to hell with her being a picky eater. Maybe she really was just a little alien inside there. A little alien that hated cat food. The image of you sitting at your dining table across from Bomi eating two plates of people food crossed your mind. She picked up the fork with her white paw and dabbed at her mouth with a cloth napkin. The idea didn’t seem the most out of reach.

In your other hand was your phone opened to the maps app with the small blue dot leading you to the specialty pet store.

“Damn spoiled, stuck up, good for nothing, pain in my as--”

“Hey! Blossom??”

Your head whipped around so fast you cracked the bones of your neck with a startling pop. You rubbed at your neck to ease the pain.

“You okay?”

At first you figured you must have dreamt him up in your neck-induced-pain. You cursed at your overactive imagination, still just as strong as it was when you had been small.

Blaze in the flesh he was alllll the way from his battered Converse to his stupidly handsome curly hair.

You laughed out incredulously with a hand still glued to the back of your neck.

“Didn’t think that I would be seeing you around here again. Or at least, I was kind of hoping that I would.”

He marched right up to you with that same smile you had pictured on Princess Bomi’s companion countless times before. Today he wore a leather jacket over the arms that you knew were covered in all kinds of flowers and vines. It hadn’t quite hit you yet that he had said he was hoping to see you.

“Sorry if I startled you. I was just...really surprised.”

“You’re fine, it’s fine.”

You neck didn’t tell you it was fine.

“What are you doing around here?”

“Pet store.” Was all you could get out. It shouldn’t have come as a surprise to you, but for someone who worked at a flower shop, he did end up smelling an awful lot like flowers. It was a sweet aroma, much like your garden.

“Ahh, I just got off.”

You walked on, also not noticing that he had started to follow you a couple steps behind.

“I realized I didn’t get your name last time.”

“Oh. It’s Y/n.”

He hummed with a smirk. “I do kinda like Blossom more.” He crammed his hands into his pants pockets with a wistful little sigh. “Pretty nickname for someone as pretty as yourself.”

“Psh. Stop.” You had said it sarcastically, but you didn’t intend for your heart to skip as harshly as it did when he had said so.

“You’ve got a pet then? Dog? Cat?”

“Cat. Just one.”

“I wish I could take care of a pet like that. Don’t think I would be too good at it though. I see myself as more of a plant person. They’re quiet, don’t do too much, and they sort of love you back in their own way.”

“How's that?”

“By growing. And flowering. Changing colors and looking good in your windowsill. Nothing too crazy.”

“I...guess I can see what you mean.”

He flicked at the black hoop pierced into his lip in the way that you certainly hadn’t forgotten; and you were one for forgetting much.

“Mind if I go in with you? I don’t have a whole lot going on.”

Jisung. You had also remembered his name. He carried Blaze with him in the way that he had that fiery glint in his eye like he knew he was getting away with something. He was brash and forward, and charming as all hell. The sunset of blood orange and cotton candy pink seemed to melt into his shoulders where he stood before you in the golden hour of the evening. A yellow carnation was tucked into the pocket of his jacket.

“You don’t have to...”

He had already made up his mind, and swung open the door to the pet shop neighboring the floral shop. You didn’t know how you had missed it.

The squawking of birds chimed with the bells hung over the shop door.

“You coming?” He held it open for you.

You sheepishly entered before him, nearly tripping on the little incline to the entrance and catching yourself three seconds before disaster.

Jisung prompted, “Lead the way.”

Normally you would have been concerned over the cleanliness of the store, but that seemed insignificant compared to the way that he looked around all in his Blaze-like wonder. He widened his eyes at the rows of fish tanks and twiddled with the little feather cat toys at the ends of the isles.

Granted, he seemed much more immersed in the kinds of aquatic plants and moss balls that they had rather than the cute bunnies and mice, but still, you couldn’t help but shy away when he caught your glances.

“Glad that I joined ya Blossom.”

₍⸍⸌̣ʷ̣̫⸍̣⸌₎

There was something about Minho that felt like a lullaby. He wore a lavender colored sweater when he arrived at your doorstep: of course it was pooling into paws at his hands as always. The collar dipped deep enough for you to see the tops of his collarbones, and they were gorgeous and curved. His eyes wrinkled a little under his wire framed glasses when he would smile: that of which would also look like the little grin of a bunny. Effortlessly his brown hair kissed his forehead.

He would speak softly and carefully, and listen to everything that you had said to him as if it was the most important thing in the world. His feet were too big for your spare pair of house slippers and he had a tiny hole in his khaki pants right by the waistline. Minho greeted Bomi with a tiny “aigoo” and she let him sweep her up into his arms where he bounced her lightly. She would never let you do that. Traitor.

“Your home is very...you.” He had complimented. You had no idea what that meant.

His lips were pink and glossy with drips of that peach soju that you had bought in the hopes that he would like it. It turned out that it was his favorite flavor.

You wanted so badly to kiss the peachy flavor off of those lips.

He had laughed a little at your array of cat-related home decor, laughing the most at your dish towels that had two fat cats on them that looked like chefs. He said that he had seen a movie once and the characters reminded him of that.

The two of you sat outside on your patio on the wire chairs that would imprint designs into the back of your legs. The air mixed with the smell of your citronella candle and the scent of the roasted duck that you had attempted to make for him. You really shouldn’t have tried to make something for the first time when it was also his first time coming over.

Maybe he was just being nice, but he had said it tasted good.

It did not taste good, but rather harshly of salt and too much rosemary.

Bomi rubbed at his legs under the table and even hiked herself up on two feet to peek into his lap. As much as it hurt to see your traitorous cat act this way, it was because of this that you knew he was someone that you could trust. Minho gave her head scratches and insisted to help you with the dishes--a mistake on his part. It took all of two minutes before you had a mishap with the detachable sink head, and soaked through his sweater.

“Maybe I just shouldn’t trust you with water then?” He chuckled while dabbing away at the fabric.

“That probably would be best.”

Minho was a lullaby in the way that he laid down next to you on that quilt you had made in a crafting class some years ago. All of the patches were disjointed the the color scheme made very little sense, but it was stull functional. He kept his hands folded to his chest with reverence. His chest rose and fell calmly, and his body heat floated over to you. His presence was something familiar and still something that you couldn’t place.

“Are you getting tired?” He asked you gently.

You lied, “No, just resting my eyes.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t have had that much soju then.” He joked into the open air.

“How much longer?”

“At least thirty more minutes.”

He was so warm. Warmer than any chill of the spring night.

First you would have kissed the peachy flavor on his lips. Then you would have cuddled all up into that lavender sweater which you imagined to be even softer than cat’s fur--or rather--it looked like it could have been.

“Do you know any constellations?” Minho pointed up to the sky.

“Not really.”

“Well, that one is Ursa Major...and over there...that’s Leo. Can you see that it sort of looks like a triangle?”

“Yes.” You had said, but really you didn’t have a clue, you liked it more hearing him talk about them. “Where did you learn about constellations?”

“Long time ago. I think it was in school, but, that was so, so long ago.”

The cool grass under the quilt rustled when he had leaned back up to sit, then dragged quilt attempt #2 over your body and his.

“It was getting a little cold.” He quietly announced.

His simple action of doing just that heated up your whole body now knowing that the two of you were trapped together, inches apart.

Minho tucked his arms to prop up his head. “Thank you for cooking for me. I haven’t had someone other than my mother cook like that for me in a long while.”

“I’m sorry...I know that it was pretty inedible--”

“--And thank you for allowing me to come over too. I...realize...I don’t really know what I’m doing that well. I kind of invited myself...I hope that I’m not putting pressure on you or anything...”

“--Doing what well?” Your heart leapt into your throat.

“I just haven’t done this in a really long time.”

This.

What the hell was “this?”

“I’m not following...”

“Letting myself do something fun. Something nice and relaxing.”

You had formed a painful little “Oh.” on your lips. Your idea of this was different from his after all.

“--Something nice and relaxing with you.”

Another “Oh.” formed, but this one was a thankful one.

“Can I tell you something?” Minho’s voice was barely in a whisper.

“What is it?” You looked over at him and he was wrapped in the navy blue light of the night. You could have sworn that you could see the faintest inkling of stars in his eyes.

He looked back at you in earnest. “I’ve been...scared, too, since moving back out here.”

“W-why?”

“There was something in me that was telling me that moving out here wouldn’t fix everything, and that I would be stuck forever on those things that happened, and the things that made me unhappy.”

“Minho...what are you saying?”

“-Got my heart broken. Back then. As cliché as the sounds.” He laughed, and it even sounded a twinge embarrassed. “I ran away from it to here. I had figured that it would give me time to get it all back together again.”

“I-I’m so sorry.”

“Running is good and all when you can physically remove yourself from what’s chasing you, but some things...”

Your chest felt heavy. “I know exactly what you’re talking about.”

“You do?”

The first summer cicadas had started their nighttime chant, and their hisses ebbed and flowed like sea waves.

“I feel like...these expectations that my family has of me, my mother...I can’t ever escape them. They’re always there and burned into my head. I think of them even when I don’t want to: get a better job that “contributes”, get married, have grandkids...”

You paused with your own eyes cast up to the sky. The massive expanse seemed unfathomable.

“Why is it that we can’t ever be happy doing the things that are supposed to make us happy?”

The first meteor flew past your eyes with the speed of light, barely slow enough for you to catch it.

The second was a bit slower, and traced after it a millisecond of white spectral dust.

“Did you see that??” Without thinking, you poked once at Minho’s arm.

You couldn’t see, but he had grinned with a weak smile. “I did.”

All at once, the sky was illuminated with brilliant streaks of light and their white hot heads that would fade and dissapear just as quickly as they arrived. They tore through the sky with astonishing speed and you traced the outline of each line as fast as you could.

“There’s so many.” You wondered aloud.

Under the warmth of the haphazard blanket, fingers twisted into yours: careful and tentative, soft and curious.

Minho breathed out, “I feel pretty happy right now.”

123 notes · View notes

merinnan · 4 years ago

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DMBJ Explore with the Note Ep 2

Okay, I wasn't sure if I'd get to ep 2 today, but I need Iron Triangle shenanigans to cheer me up after the feels fest that was Train to Busan

So here we go! DMBJ S2 Ep 2!

The counts at the start of ep 2!

Season 2 Xiaoge Rescue Count: 1 for Wu Xie, 1 for protagonists, 2 for everyone

Season 2 Wu Xie Swoon Count: 0

Cumulative Xiaoge Rescue Count: 11 for Wu Xie, 16 for protagonists, 18 for everyone

Cumulative Wu Xie Swoon Count: 6

- Opening with Wu Xie wandering around somewhere, so I'm guessing this is another dream/nightmare

- 'Somewhere' turns out to be a sunken ship

- Minus all the water

- I'm expecting a jump scare any moment now

- Not as bad a one as I expected, but still

- a wild Sanshu suddenly appears!

- This dream Sanshu being just as creepy as the dream Sanshu in the previous ep

- And just as murderous

- And now he wakes up thanks to Pangzi, and it's daytime now

- Looks like the storm is over, too

- OMG Pangzi that is not how you're supposed to meditate

- lol @ Wu Xie's confused reaction to it

- Hahah, A-Ning was not successful in hiding the booze from Pangzi

- Wu Xie, baby, I love your confidence here about there being no complicated traps, but it's entirely misplaced

- He definitely has to suspect that that's Xiaoge after the whole ghost ship thing, he wouldn't be giving that cute little smile otherwise

- Oh god, the English dubbing is so bad. The words and lips don't sync at all

- And it looks like her boss is a foreigner this time?

- This water is so murky

- This swimming around underwater making exaggerated gestures bit could have been much shorter than it is

- Like seriously

- It wouldn't be quite as bad if the water wasn't just this constant murky green so that you could actually see properly

- But as it is I'm mostly just looking at this dirty green screen with some shapes moving past sometimes

- I get padding out an episode, but it's been almost five minutes of this now

- Oh, at least now we're at least getting little flashes of Wu Xie recognising this stuff from his grandfather's notebook

- But still

- HURRY THE FUCK UP AND GET TO THE TOMB

- 5 1/2 mins before something even marginally interesting happens >.<

- Because apparently now the statue is opening its eyes. Maybe.

- Wait no, I counted wrong

- 7 1/2 MINS

- 8 1/2 mins before they get to any breaking and entering

- 8 1/2 mins to do what should have taken 2

- It wasn't even marginally interesting filler >.<

- Just....dirty green screen with some dark shapes, and the occasional close up on faces or wrist notepads

- And this knife is cutting through the mortar holding these bricks together suspiciously easily

- Oh, the evil hair is making its first appearance

- Evil Hair Count: 1

- Yes, touching it is a great idea! Well done!

- Oh, it scared it away this time

- Apparently, the evil hair being scared away is what triggers the brick door to automatically open for them

- Oh, I like this shot of the wetsuit hood almost looking like a hoodie hood. I'm not sure if that was intentional, but I still like it.

- SUDDEN CORPSE APPEARANCE

- Oh, sudden thing swimming real fast into/around them

- Most of this episode has just been...murky green

- Like. They've been in the water for 10 minutes so far. And the only important/interesting things that have happened have been finding Sanshu's stick, finding the statues that reminded Wu Xie of shit in the notebook, Wu Xie thinking the statue eyes opened, the appearance of the evil hair, the door opening, the corpse appearing, and now this thing swimming by them. All of which could have been done in, like, a third of the time.

- Since they all took only a few seconds each

- Oh, it was evil hair lady, who is now swimming away super fast when Pangzi shot at her.

- I'm amazed he could see clearly enough in the murk to even aim, tbh

- Oooh, dramatic music

- It would be nice if I could see clearly enough to know the reason for the dramatic music

- PANGZI. WU XIE. YOU HAVE NOTEPADS ON YOUR WRISTS.

- YOU DO NOT NEED TO TAKE OUT YOUR OXYGEN MOUTHPIECES TO TRY TO TALK UNDERWATER

- YOU ARE WASTING YOUR OXYGEN

- OH HI EVIL HAIR LADY

- I will make that Evil Hair Count: 2, because it was a lovely shot of her hair as well

- Oh, they've made that maelstrom-like tunnel the entrance to the tomb in the drama

- Oh god, the greenscreen

- I think Chongqi is the only one I've seen so far that does greenscreen even halfway well

- It took them 11 1/2 mins to get into the tomb

- An entire quarter of the episode was just them fucking around underwater where the viewer could barely see what was happening at the best of times

- Since the ep is 45 mins including opening and ending credits

- Oh, they've come out into the room with the pots, except it has a pool in it this time

- Sigh. Of course they gave A-Ning pink-accented gear.

- They all have a different colour on their goggles to tell them apart, but in the underwater stuff it was too dark to tell what colours she and Xiaoge had. Now that they're out of the water, I can see that hers is pink.

- And I'm like

- WHY

- PLEASE

- STOP

- Why are there spiderwebs in the underwater tomb?

- The babby zombie footprints!

- Yes, Pangzi, those tiny little footprints are Sanshu's

- Hahah, I love little shit Wu Xie

- Apparently spiders even have to be built into underwater ones. Either that, or spiders can now dive

- Maybe when they built the tomb, they made sure to have spiders in there. Which also means they had to ensure there was spider food in there.

- Oh, hey, in the drama they actually think to look inside the jar! But babby zombie is not in there this time.

- Oh, it was in one of the other jars instead

- Okay, time to follow the baby in the jar

- Oh, this hallway

- A-Ning is about to be a very bad girl

- Also, so many cobwebs

- So many

- I think that lends credence to the 'spiders were put here when the tomb was built and so have lived here for thousands of spider generations'

- WHY ARE ALL THE CANDLES LIT

- WHO LIT THEM SO RECENTLY THAT THEY'RE STILL BURNING

- I still can't get over them subbing 'Sanshu' as 'Uncle San'

- And random English because why not

- I was about to say the traps are stupidly obvious in this hall, then I remembered the Starfinder adventure I ran where the trigger was a giant mosaic on the floor that practically screamed 'trap' & the PCs just walked over it. And then were surprised when the trap triggered.

- Oh, here we go, A-Ning's about to do the thing

- Complete with evil villain smirk as she does so

- I wish there was better lighting in this hallway, because A-Ning's moves are amazing and I would like to be able to see them better

- Xiaoge Rescue Count: 2 for Wu Xie, 2 for protagonists, 3 for everyone

- Those are some wuxia-esque spinny moves from A-Ning there

- Nooooo, Xiaoge, don't leave Wu Xie there without you!

- I wondered how they were going to have Wu Xie get hit by them since Xiaoge stopped him from being hit by the initial shots

- Dammit, A-Ning

- I appreciate that Pangzi's first reaction is to run to check on Wu Xie

- Even though that got him shot himself

- lol, these two dummies sitting there screaming once they notice all the arrows that they hadn't noticed before

- Good Pangzi, showing off that you're actually smart by realising Something Is Up with these arrows

- "Does it feel this good to be shot to death?"

"I've never died before, I have no idea"

- Hahahah, waving the arrow to see it that would attract more firing

- Then oh so carefully peeking up over the edge

- Ah, finally Xiaoge reveals himself properly!

- That face mask is just ridiculous

- lol, Wu Xie's reaction

- Those wide puppy eyes

- lol, Xiaoge's little smirk at Wu Xie

- And again. THEY'RE SO CUTE I CAN'T

- Here we are at the first chamber switcheroo

- I wish they'd subtitle at least the important parts of Wenjin's notebook when Wu Xie reads it and gets clues

- They were good with subtitling the wrist notepads when they were aimlessly swimming around for 11 mins

- But nothing else

- "Do you have Alzheimers" OMFG, Pangzi

- Pangzi gonna Pangzi

- I seem to say something along those lines about all of the Iron Triangle

- But it's true

- Ahahah, Wu Xie's facial expressions when he's brushing off Pangzi here

- It's little shit Wu Xie all over

- Look, okay, flashbacks are fine and all, but does it have to be a flashback to the FUCKING GREEN MURKY WATER

- Okay, at least that part wasn't too long

- That container is not sealed, that paper should not have been dry

- Certainly not so dry that exposure to air made it crumble and blow away

- Professor Zhang?

- HOW WERE THE IMPRINT OF WORDS LEFT BEHIND IN THE DUST?!

- IDK why they needed two archaeological teams in this flashback

- Also, hi, flashback Xiaoge

- Hey, it's the copper snek fishy

- Oh, that was a good cliffhanger to leave this episode on!

- Xiaoge remembering that he has been there before

So! Ep 2 ends with:

Season 2 Xiaoge Rescue Count: 2 for Wu Xie, 2 for protagonists, 3 for everyone

Season 2 Wu Xie Swoon Count: 0

Season 2 Evil Hair Count: 2

Cumulative Xiaoge Rescue Count: 12 for Wu Xie, 17 for protagonists, 18 for everyone

Cumulative Wu Xie Swoon Count: 6

#alicia watches dmbj #dmbj #daomu biji #explore with the note #xiaoge rescue count #wu xie swoon count #evil hair count #wu xie #xiaoge #zhang qiling #wang pangzi #iron triangle

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dangermousie · 5 years ago

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So, I watched 15 episodes of Ever Night in one day

That is sort of cheating because since this is a rewatch, I skipped through most of Ning Que and MSS’s neverending camping trip. I got a NOTP, y’all.

These puppies though:

Though this is still mega long and cap heavy and thus behind read more,

Here because I am into blood on flctional men’s faces. Maybe Ning Que should be hanging out with My Country boys.

OMG, I’d forgotten the annoying evil hag was also in the first season. Whenever she appears, she’s always after a non-insane character. Is it a hobby? But NQ giving no fucks and getting into her face and actually terrifying her was delicious. I love it when he’s a bastard to people who deserve it.

This literally made me laugh because he is so shameless in his pragmatism and poor conceited Long Qing is so lost:

And that should have been the end of it but LQ doesn’t know when to stop and the moment he brought Sang Sang up, he got way more of a reaction he bargained for because nobody even hints at messing with SS - NQ will end you. His customary pragmatism deserts NQ utterly.

And that is how you end up with an arrow through you very fancily attired chest.

Oh, Ning Que. That is the most romantic thing I’ve heard in ages and you don’t even realize you love her that way. But honestly, the two have been together and each other’s everything for so long, I don’t think there is room for another person there unless one of them dies. (Also, I cracked up at MSS during this because boy, the lady just realized she might have quite an uphill climb into NQ’s affections.)

This is here because it’s patented NQ - I mean who says that to a demon-possessed super powerful evil dude doing his best to murder you - and it cracked me up.

Nobody throws a pity party like Long Qing, who is clearly a creature of extremes, and having deservedly lost his cultivation powers thanks to NQ, has decided instead of going home to be a boring royal prince or marrying a sugar mama princess who seems to want him no matter what, that wandering around barefoot in the snow and declaiming he is the lowest of the low and unworthy of his fiancee’s love and how dare she crash his pity party for one, is superior. I mean, you do you, LQ, you do you. His girlfriend must really be into the drama, fabulous hair, or the qi-enhanced D, because otherwise sticking with him is - would not be my choice, much as it’s fun to watch.

As I said, girl lives for drama because she follows him to his hovel and offers sex, but why would LQ want sex when he can have a good wallow instead? If NQ and SS are pragmatic, LQ is the opposite, probably because he never had to be practical in his life. Though he’s gone from I am the bestest prettiest child of light to I will be the most wretched person ever in record speed - so I think absolutism and exceptionalism (I will be wretched in a way nobody ever has been before) are perhaps even more of a thing for him.

And more of this. Dude, give it a rest!

I love this bit. I love whenever NQ gets all righteously angry and revenge-driven because honestly, he deserves to get it. And I love his fear that his targets would die through other means while he trains and just that deep-seated burning rage under the surface. I love it.

Meanwhile SS got a master (who, if she knew, is the one who wiped out NQ’s family and other horrid stuff) but also found her birth parents. I love that she has no idea how to react to this because the notion is so alien to her.

And finally, NQ is back and I love everything about it - how SS’ joy falls when she sees the beautiful and elegant MSS he brought back (such a contrast to SS’ shabby clothes and stuffed mouth) and MSS is sizing up the competition and NQ, so oblivious, the dumb boy, only knowing how glad he is to see SS and basically shining around her and asking for a hug and being so puzzled by why SS is being stand-offish (I am not sure SS herself realizes; they are such dummies) and being hurt his homecoming not what he thought and just my puppies!!!!!!

His cajoling her like a kid until she gives him a hug, as she desperately resists because she’s so angry even though I don’t think she realiy realizes why she is angry is just the most adorable amazing thing.

And then she finally does and I love it because it really comes across as the two of them being able to breathe again (and I crack up because she’s so tiny, she can’t even make a headrest for him haha and he still has to bend down to even put his chin on top of her head.)

I think this is the crux of their roadblock though - because his remembering she wanted a particular toy as a small kid and buying it when he saw it again in the middle of all the fighting and God knows what else he was involved in is astonishingly sweet but I think it’s also a sign of his failing to consciously realize what his subconscious has figured out - neither one of them is a kid any longer.

Only in wuxia, would a couple time involve burying their separate enemy wuxia masters next to each other.

That was so painful because I get them both - I get why he hates her master but I get why she liked him - she doesn’t remember any massacre and it’s all abstract to her and the old man was loving and protective.

But guess what. They seem to back off and cool down except something much worse happens in terms of potential stumbling block. You know you are watching wuxia when the OTP’s issues involve “ummm, I am suddenly a demon, still wanna date?”

(ahhh, the irony!)

(hahahahaha)

This is mega long and you get a prize (the prize is that you are not a demonist) for reading this epic thing.

#cdrama #ever night #chen feiyu #song yiren

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jakoby-axbxrn · 5 years ago

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CHARACTER QUESTIONNAIRE: JAKOBY SEARYN

BASICS - 1. Height? 5’9” 2. Eye colour? Sunset orange. 3. Do they need glasses? No. 4. Scars and birthmarks? He has a lot of tiny scars that are mostly faded just from years and years of hunting and gathering, and his hands are pretty calloused from using his longbow. He also has a slightly faded scar through the end of his right eyebrow, near his temple, from when he was knocked unconscious by Lord Klaus Firion. 5. Tattoos and piercings? He has no tattoos, and no piercings. 6. Right or left handed? Ambidextrous, with a tendency to favor his right. 7. Any disabilities? Physical or mental. No physical disabilities. Definitely has lingering psychological trauma and anger issues from the events of his father’s murder. 8. Do they have any allergies? None. 9. Favourite colour? Green. 10. Typical outfits? Mostly just simple clothes, leathers and a dark green hooded cloak when he’s hunting, or a similar white cloak for more wintry and snowy conditions. 11. Do they wear any makeup? No. 12. What weapon do they use, if any? He has a dagger and handaxe in case anything too aggressive or ferocious gets close enough, but he primarily uses his longbow. He also sometimes uses his handaxe to get through any natural obstacles in the forest.

PERSONALITY - 13. Are they more optimistic or pessimistic? He tends to lean towards being optimistic, but can be quite cynical at times. 14. Are they introverted or extroverted? He’s more extroverted than introverted, but he also deeply enjoys the solitude of hunting in the forest. 15. What are their pet peeves? When someone acts like they’re better than him, or anyone else. 16. What bad habits do they have? He tends to speak the same way to everyone, no matter who it is, which can make him come off as uncouth sometimes. 17. Do they have any phobias? He's never been in the situation where it's been an issue, but he is claustrophobic. Specifically being buried alive. 18. How do they display affection? Jakoby is definitely a hugger. 19. How competitive are they? Not very, and when he does get competitive, it's only playful. 20. If they could change one thing about themselves, what would it be? He'd change how reckless his anger makes him. 21. Do they have any obscure hobbies or routines? When he and Rae go out to hunt, on good weather days, they both like to spend at least an hour together either in a tree or at the base of one, enjoying the sun and relaxing.

BACKSTORY - 22. What are the names and ages of their close family members? Parents, siblings, etc. His mother, Helene, is 54. His father, Phaestus, was 54 when he died. His son, Levi, is three years old. 23. Is their family alive and are they still in contact with them? The living family he has left is his mother and son. They all live in the same house, and he and his mother run a business together selling animal pelts and meat. 24. Where are they from? City, nation? Jakoby was born in the forest just outside of Itresa in Eowesoa. 25. Did they have a childhood best friend? He had two. His human best friend was a boy who lived in the city. They ended up dating for a while when they were teenagers. His other best friend is Asrael, and they will be best friends until the end of their days together. 26. Have they had any pets? Technically, yes, he has Asrael, but as his animal companion, she is so much more than that to him. 27. Did they grow up rich or poor? What were their living conditions like? While his family wasn’t poor while he was growing up in Eowesoa, they definitely weren’t rich. They were always well fed due to him and his father hunting all the time and doing fairly well with their business, but half of everything they hunted went towards supporting and feeding the family. So not rich, but semi self-sufficient. 28. What is their educational background? Jakoby was completely home taught. His father taught him everything he knows about hunting, as well as how to use nature-based magic as a ranger. His mother taught him how to read and write as well as how to properly handle money, and the business side of things. 29. As a child, what did they want to be when they grew up? He wanted to be an amazing hunter and ranger just like his dad. 30. What advice would they give to their younger self? Cherish every single moment you have with everyone you love. 31. Growing up, were they ever bullied or were they the bully? Jakoby has never been the type to bully anyone. He was bullied some, but most of the time, he was able to just shrug it off. 32. Who do they look up to/who is their role model? His father.

PRESENT - 33. Do they currently have a place of residence? Yes, in Runswick. 34. What is their most treasured possession? His longbow. It was handmade by his father, and it’s a beautiful piece of craftsmanship. 35. What is their drink of choice? On any given day, he’s probably drinking tea or coffee. But when it comes to alcohol, he usually just goes for a standard ale. He isn’t much of a drinker though. 36. Which king/queen are they loyal to, if any? He was born and raised in Eowesoa, and now resides in Hegaehend, but he doesn’t feel any loyalty towards any of the royals. He does carry a particular distaste towards Nickolas. 37. Have they ever killed anyone? The only people he has killed were the two men Lord Marceau Lomanne had sent to hunt down and kill his wife’s handmaiden and Levi when he was still just an infant. 38. What was their last promise and did they keep it? The last promise he made was to his son, Levi, telling him he would be right back before going and confronting Ved, and yes, he did keep it.

LOVE - 39. What was their first kiss like, if they’ve had one? It was slow and sweet, and caused the sensation of butterflies in his stomach. 40. Are they in a relationship/have a love interest? Not currently, no. But he’s a hopeless romantic and is always open to love. 41. Have they ever been in love? Yes. He experienced young puppy love with the best friend turned boyfriend from his youth. He was also deeply in love with Rebekah while they were together. Deep down, he still is, but knows that the likelihood of them ever being able to really be together is slim to none. 42. Have they ever had their heart broken? A few times, yes. The most recent heartbreak he felt was when finding out that Rebekah wasn’t even able to give Levi a name before sending him away to protect her son.

SPIRITUALITY - 43. Do they follow a god, if so who? He isn’t really an avid follower of any of them. 44. What do they think happens to them after death? He’s not sure. He hopes it’s at least something peaceful, but thinking about it for too long usually leads to him not feeling great.

#romtask #character questionnaire #cw: mention of claustrophobia #// idk if that tag is necessary but better safe than sorry

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mrpenguinpants · 6 years ago

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Dabi x Hawks Roommate/Marriage AU

I just went through a really stressful uni application process. I’ve got 2 essays due tomorrow. But I’m here. Again. I feel like I make these too long but whatever. Anyways

Oh yeah btw, I’m totally down to write shit. So just send me a request. It doesn’t have to be dabihawks (I’m literally only writing dabihawks cause I'm obsessed) or hero academia. (I’m really just lonely so) Also does not have to be headcanons, idm writing actual fics. Headcanons are just easier for me.

This is also not connected with the tattoo artist dabi x dancer hawks, this is just self-indulgent stuff

Hawks and Dabi moved in together when Dabi saw an ad on his college board for a roommate

“So I’m broke af and really lonely so I’m looking for a roommate. Contact me with the info below. It’s okay if you’re a murderer. College is kicking my ass and I’ll gladly accept death.”

Dabi calls him that day

“I’m not a murderer but I can probably get us both killed in a week”

He meets with Hawks after school as they walk back to his apartment

“Basically, just don’t do anything that lands me in deeper debt. Pay for rent and whatever else you need, and don’t be a dick. Either than that, I’m sure when we actually start living together we can make some ground rules”

Dabi is a tiny bit concerned “You serious? Not that I’m not accepting but shouldn’t you be a bit more concerned with who you let in your home?”

“Please, I don’t have anything worth stealing, I’m broke, and I’m ready to die at any given moment. Unless you start shitting on the floor I don’t think we’ll have a problem. Is there something I should be concerned about?”

Dabi moves in the next week

If there was anything Dabi should have been concerned about, its Hawks

Hawks literally has no s h a m e

Dabi lived with his siblings before moving out when he graduated from high school. He has some level of decency

Hawks, however, has been an only child with neglectful parents

Not that Dabi minds too much, anyone is better than his father, but it’s only been a week and Dabi has seen Hawks butt-ass naked 4 times. Not that he minds

But there is only so much his homosexual heart can take

So Dabi sits him down one night over take-out (none of them know how to cook. The only time they do is when Hawks friend Rumi comes over or when Dabi’s sister sends him food)

“Dude, I know we just met and just started living together and it’s great. But you need to put your dick away when I’m here”

“Is it distracting?”

“Yeah. It is. I don’t know what kinda things you’re into but I don’t walk around with my fucking dick in the air”

“I’m gonna be real with you right now. I really just want to get laid...by you...like right now”

what is shame amirite?

They just stare at each other for the longest time before Dabi shrugs

“Sure”

After that, they got a lot more comfortable with each other (because I can’t be bothered to do slow burns (pun intended))

(Gonna be real with you, this part is just me throwing ideas out)

One day, Hawks comes home stressed out and looking like death itself before throwing himself on the couch next to Dabi and laying his head on his legs

Dabi just looks at him “Rough day at work?”

Hawks just explodes at that “THIS FUCKING CUNT OH MY GOD. SHE WAS GIVING ME SO MUCH SHIT ABOU-”

Dabi nod along as Hawks yells his feelings

“I don’t know what I’m doing anymore. I just want to sleep for a century”

Hawks looks at him with the biggest puppy eyes Dabi has ever seen

“You wanna get shit-faced drunk even though it’s a Tuesday?”

“PLEASE”

During their first days of living with each other, Hawks and Dabi decide to eat dinner together. You know, talk and get to know the other

Since they both don’t know how to cook they just order takeout

It’s really awkward

“So, how was your day?”

“Uh, it was...goood”

“Cool. Cool”

God kill me

Dabi reflects on his life when he was still living with his siblings and what they talked about at the table. About 99.9% of it was them shit talking on their dad

“So, you know that security lady. The one that hangs around the cafeteria?”

“Yeah? What about her?”

“She’s a bitch, isn’t she?”

“OH MY GOD LET ME TELL YOU THIS ONE TIME-”

Yeah. Dabi’s got this. Turns out Hawks loves to shit talk and rant about people

He calls his sister and mom later that day to thank them

They think he’s high but whatever works

Dabi’s family comes to visit him over the break. Hawks is freaking the fuck out cause what if they don’t like him and make Dabi move out? How is he gonna survive on this own? What if they are really scary and murder him? (not that he is opposed to that but he rather die later and with Dabi)

Dabi isn’t that concerned. It’s only his sister and mother coming to visit and they are just coming to make sure he’s still alive

“Hawks. You need to calm down. Trust me, they’re cool”

“BUT WHAT IF THEY DON’T LIKE ME. WHAT IF THEY DON’T GIVE ME THEIR BLESSING????”

“Hawks, we’re not dating nor are we getting married”

“Dude, we ride together we die together-”

“I don’t think that saying works here”

“-We’re practically soul mates at this point”

“...shit you’re right”

Dabi introduces Hawks as his boyfriend to his family

His family is proud of him even though they are 110% sure Dabi blackmailed or paid him

It happens after they graduate college. They decided to stay together in the same shitty apartment

They were sitting together on the couch watching Disney movies (Hawks request)

Hawks is leaning on Dabi as Dabi is bored out of his mind

“Dabi?”

“Yeah?”

“We’ve been together for like 4ish years now right?”

“Yeah”

“And if I were to die what would you do?”

“Probably kill everyone, burn the world to the ground and then kill myself”

“I love you-you know that?”

“I do”

Insertawkwardpausehere

“-So I was wondering if you wanted to get married or..something”

“Yeah sure”

They both pause. Look at each other. Before screaming

“Wait really?!” they both yell at the same time. Hawks is literally in tears rn

“I-I don’t really have a ring, I mean I can go into the kitchen right now and get some tin foil bu-”

“Woah Woah wait Hawks. You wanna get married??”

“BITCH IF YOU GO BACK ON THIS RIGHT NOW IM KICKING YOU OUT”

“FUCK YEAH I WANNA GET MARRIED”

“GOOD”

“GREAT”

“FANTASTIC”

“AMAZING”

They calm down after an hour

“Are you sure though Hawks? It means you’re gonna have to be with my crusty ass”

“Dabi, I’ve seen your dick. It’s not crusty”

“I think that was the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me”

“I literally proposed to you”

“And I accepted”

Dabi calls his family to tell them the good news and Hawks calls Rumi. It was 4am so obv they didn’t pick up so they left a voice message

“Sup fuckers, I got married to my bird boyfriend. Tell our homophobic father he ain’t invited to my wedding”

“RUMI!!! I JUST PROPOSED AND HE SAID YES! WHAT DO I DO! AM I DYING? I THINK I’M DYING”

Just letting you know, I’m totally continuing this in the future. I WILL MAKE MY BOYS HAPPY

#dabihawks #dabi bnha #bnha hawks #boku no hero academia #bnha #mha #bnha headcanons #hotwings #dabi is a todoroki #roommate au #college au #i want these boys to get married #fuck it it's 4am i'm writing these boys getting married you can't stop me #marriage #dabi is touya

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formerprincess · 6 years ago

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A tale written with fangs and claws || Chapter 50

Chapters: 50/? Fandom: Teen Wolf (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Liam Dunbar/Theo Raeken, Corey Bryant/Mason Hewitt Characters: Liam Dunbar, Theo Raeken, Mason Hewitt, Corey Bryant, Nolan (Teen Wolf) Additional Tags: Alpha Liam Dunbar, Slow Build, Friends to Lovers, Dunbar Pack, Bisexual Liam Dunbar, Werewolf Theo Raeken, Alpha Theo Raeken, Canon-Typical Violence, Smut, Mates, Liam and Theo are mates, Top Theo Raeken, Bottom Theo Raeken, Top Liam, Bottom Liam Dunbar Series: Part 1 of Morning Dew Pack

New adversaries show their faces in town and the core pack gets some valuable insight from no other than Peter Hale himself. In the end, Liam has to make a decision that breaks his heart.

Liam came down the stairs and made his way over to the coffee maker to fill himself a cup full of the tasty drink. The only other person in the kitchen was Nolan who sat perched at the kitchen island and read a magazine. “Good morning,” Liam greeted. “Morning,” Nolan replied but continued to read. Out of curiosity, Liam glanced at the article that had captured his friend’s attention so much. “20 signs he’s into you?” He read out loud and Nolan jumped. He dropped the magazine (one of Sadie’s as Liam realized) on the counter and squeaked. “I was just curious!” “About what exactly? How you detect someone liking you?” Nolan looked like he really wanted to lie but then decided to be honest instead. He sighed gravely. “Yeah.”

Liam narrowed his eyes. Now he was on a case since he remembered a similar talk a few days prior. “Is there someone you would want to like you?” “Maybe,” Nolan said evasively. “And is this somebody a tall werewolf who works in a flower shop?” Nolan squeaked again. “Are you that good or do you have cameras around? Or is it in my chemosignals? Please don’t say it’s the latter because that would mean he can smell it too and I would probably die of embarrassment!” “Relax! Your chemosignals are fine. I’m just that good.” Liam grinned. “To be fair, I was just assuming and you confirmed I was right.” “Oh.” Nolan looked stunned. “You got sneaky!” Liam chuckled and shrugged. “Sorry, not sorry. So you like Brett. That’s awesome. You should absolutely ask him on a date.” “Hah! Hah! No!” Nolan shook his head. “If he says No I will be humiliated and would have disturbed the pack dynamic. No way, Jose!” “And if he says yes?” Nolan shook his head again. “Nope. My imagination is not big enough for that!” “Oh my god!" Liam could not with these two. They were both ridiculous. Had he and Theo been that ridiculous before they started dating?

“Just go and ask him, Nolan, I’m sure it will be fine!” The hunter tapped at the magazine. “According to this article, Brett is not into me! That settles it and I can spare myself the humiliation.” “Those articles are garbage.” “Don’t let Sadie hear it, those are basically her bible.” “You both are being ridiculous! You for believing that shit and she for even subscribing to it!” But Nolan held his ground and grabbed the magazine. “I won’t ask him out!” He declared and then left the kitchen in the direction of the living room. Liam groaned.

Theo entered the kitchen just as his boyfriend considered locking Brett and Nolan into a tiny room together. “Good morning, baby.” “Good morning.” Liam popped his elbow on the counter and put his chin on the palm of his hand. “I am so happy I never had to ask you out.” Theo had opened the fridge but now closed it without taking something out. “A part of me feels insulted,” he declared. “No! I meant I’m happy I never had to worry if you would say yes before I asked you. I just acted and it worked out fine. I’m happy it did, obviously.” The First Beta stepped on the other side of the kitchen island and braced his arms on top of it. “Is there a special reason why you’re talking about this?” “Nolan and Brett are driving me nuts. I trust you to keep quiet about it so I’m telling you. Brett likes Nolan and Nolan likes Brett but both are too chicken shit to do something about it because Liam you are absolutely crazy and what are you even thinking?” “And you’re the only one who knows about it,” Theo realized. Liam grinned innocently. “Now you know as well.” “I’m not helping you setting our friends up. I’m not good at playing matchmaker, puppy.” “We could do it the Thiam way!” “The Thiam way would mean one of them becoming an Alpha and making the other his Beta, gaining a pack, let the Betas gain control, and then just kiss the other. I doubt you can recreate the Thiam way.” Liam sulked and Theo chortled. He walked around the island and wrapped his arms around Liam. “Our way is pretty unique, little Alpha, and I am happy about it. It was perfect for us and nobody else.” He was right, Liam realized, and he just nodded and leaned in to brush his lips against Theo’s. “My logical Beta is right like so often. Doesn’t it get boring to be right so many times?” “Nope,” Theo smirked and kissed Liam again.

****** “The giraffe baby was so cute. It’s still a baby but already so tall. I like the dots the giraffes have and how they walk.” “The dots are amazing but I also liked the seals. How they played in the water was really entertaining.” “Thank you for taking me to the zoo, Liam.” Liam squeezed Landon’s shoulder. “Anytime, buddy.” They just came home from a fun day at the zoo, just the two of them. Liam had promised Landon a day where it was just the two brothers doing stuff and Landon had wanted to go to the zoo. It had been an amazing day.

They now entered the pack house. Tim sat in the living room and read a comic. Now he raised his head and smiled at them. “Hey, you two, how has your trip been?” “It was so funny. We could see how the lions got fed and then we watched the seals play around and there was a giraffe baby. The meerkats got a new compound and we saw rhinos and elephants. Liam bought me some things at the zoo shop and look at that.” Landon showed Tim a picture of the two brothers they had taken on one of those picture machines set all around the zoo. It had a cheetah patterned frame and the zoo mascot in the right upper corner. Landon and Liam both had a picture and Landon proudly showed his copy while Liam’s was currently sitting in his bag. “It was really fun. Here, we made some videos.” The young Alpha pulled his phone out of his jeans and opened his video folder. “This one was in front of the hyena habitat.” He started the video. Liam had filmed the habitat with the animals chilling in the sun or gnawing at some flesh and bones they got fed earlier on and then the camera panned around, showed Landon watching the hyenas and then Liam had filmed himself waving at the camera. In the background, you suddenly heard the hyenas laughing. “It was so funny, I never heard those sounds before. I know people said hyenas laugh but I seriously never heard it until now. Listen to that,” Liam explained to Tim right as Lori walked in, munching on a sandwich.

Suddenly Tim pointed at the phone. “They laugh like this annoying group!” He exclaimed loudly. Everybody stared at him. It was weird seeing the usual quiet Tim being so agitated. “Is this normal or scary?” Landon asked and looked at Liam. “Right now he's scaring me,” Liam replied and made a face. “Remember how I told you about this group with their loud and obnoxious laughs? They sounded just like the hyenas!” “Laughing like a hyena? Isn’t this something people sometimes say?” Lori shrugged her shoulders and took another bite from her sandwich. “Where’s the big deal?” “It’s not a big deal but when you hear this over and over it gets annoying. And it wasn’t just alike, it sounded exactly like those animals in Liam’s video.” “I’m sure about the annoying part. It was fun at the zoo but having a group of people doing it? That gets old very fast,” Liam agreed with it. “I’m the last person to trash talk somebody’s habits or whatever but that was just plain weird,” Tim defended himself. “I know you’re not making fun of anybody. When you notice something unusual about somebody else it is just normal to react. And if it’s an annoying habit, it’s only more noticeable.” Liam smiled at his Beta. Tim really was one of the nicest people he knew. So when he said something, it must have been absolutely annoying.

****** "Ten bucks saying the housemaid killed the wife,” Theo betted from his place on the couch. He was rested with his head against Liam’s chest and the couple watched some sort of detective series Corey had dug out. It was an old one but Corey liked old movies and series and had convinced the others to watch it with him.

Not all members of the pack were there though. The girls had decided on a girls night out and had dressed up to go out and dance the night away. Landon was at a friend’s house and stayed the night there as well so the guys could watch some movies about murder without worrying about a child seeing something he was not supposed to see.

Liam now gave his boyfriend an amused look and reached into Theo’s lap where the bowl of popcorn was placed. He grabbed a handful and threw some into his mouth to chew on it. “I’m saying it was the wife’s sister,” Caden betted against Theo. “Now it’s getting interesting! Okay, I accept. Let’s see who wins.” Theo took some of the popcorn Liam had gathered for himself, ignored the Alpha’s noises of protest, and put it in his mouth. He chewed and smirked at Caden. “What if you both are wrong?” Mason asked. “Then they both keep their money and everyone is happy,” Liam decided and ran his hand through Theo’s hair. His mate leaned his head back and enjoyed the soft treatment. “Hmm, sounds fair,” he mumbled and Liam chuckled. “If you’re getting handsy, I’m leaving,” Tim warned from his place at the floor. “Hey, be happy we have an Alpha couple that is that much in love and shows it like this. I met packs where the Alpha kept such a strict grip on their SO, it was clear there was no love and just fear. I rather have them get handsy and lovey-dovey than Theo cowering in front of Liam and never see them touching,” Brett suddenly said. He was curled up in one of the settles and had his arms wrapped around a pillow. Liam had tried to sit him and Nolan next to each other in the beginning, but Nolan ended up on the other couch with Corey and Mason. “Really?” Tim craned his neck to look at Brett. “Yeah.” The tall werewolf nodded. “Some Alphas are... let’s call it what it is, they’re assholes and control freaks. Their Betas are not allowed to do much and they have to follow strict rules. Of course, that also applies to the Alpha’s mate.” “I can’t imagine that. Especially after knowing these two.” Corey jabbed his thumb in the direction of Liam and Theo. Liam had listened to the conversation but wrapped his arms around his boyfriend. He couldn’t imagine ordering Theo around as well. Not only because it would never work with Theo’s character but also because he saw Theo as his equal. And when Theo submitted to him because he wanted to, it was beautiful and intimate and just for the two of them. Liam would never take advantage of it.

“I honestly never thought about what kind of Alpha I wanted to be. A good one, yes, but I never really considered what that would entail. I just went with my gut feeling. You guys made it easy for me and now we have the wonderful pack we have,” he praised his Betas. “You’re sweet, Liam, but we all know we didn’t make it easy for you. Some of us gave you a run for your money,” Mike retorted. “Okay, yes, but that also shaped me as an Alpha. And you all came around in the end. Sadie, you, Tim, Brett. I’m happy about that.” “We realized what you and the pack offered was a family, something some of us never really knew. That’s why.” Mike shrugged and Brett hummed affirmatively. “Heartwarming but, guys, the detective is about to solve the case.” Corey pointed at the screen and immediately had everyone’s attention. They watched the man on screen reconstruct the crime and when he was about to announce the killer, the front door flew open and the girls came in.

“You won’t believe what happened!” Sadie called out but was shushed by Caden and Theo. “Shh, I’m about to win ten dollars!” Both said at the same time and the blonde blinked owlishly. Then she glanced at the screen and scoffed. “Stop that video, what we have to say is important!” “Really, guys, you need to hear this,” Lori backed Sadie up while Maya and Ever nodded. Corey sighed but then pressed the pause button. “Okay, we’re all ears,” he said. “So, we’re at this club and it’s not completely empty but not overly crowded either. You had to wait a while for your drinks but that’s fine. Music was good and we talked while we waited. But there were those two girls who acted absolutely entitled and like the world belonged to them. One asked the barkeeper something and she didn’t like what he answered so they started to argue.” Sadie was completely riled up and talked fastly. “All of sudden, she reaches over the bar, grabs one of the glasses there, and slams it over his head. Just like that. It was like a scene from a bad soap opera.” “What?” The boys could not believe that. It seemed like something from a bad movie. “And here’s the thing why we’re telling you this: Not only were they aggressive as hell but when she turned to look at her friend, their eyes flashed. Just not like a werewolf’s eyes,” Maya added to the story. “What do you mean not like a werewolf?” Theo inquired. “Well, a wendigo’s eyes are white, right? A werewolf’s eyes are golden. Their eyes looked like a mixture of these two. Very pale and almost impossible to make out a color.” Now Ever took over. “The friend of the girl looks at Sadie and goes: Out of my way, Blondie, or I will claw your face off. And then the girls plus three guys who belonged with them stormed off.” “You all know I can get angry,” Sadie said, “But they were completely off the rails. Their chemosignals basically glowed with aggression. It was crazy.” “Thankfully every other patron thought the light in the club had been the reason for their eyes looking strange. That way we didn’t have mass panic,” Lori summed it up. “So what? We now have to worry about a group of unknown weres on top of somebody watching us and trying to run us over by car?” Caden questioned and they all looked at each other quite unsure. Corey hummed. “I wouldn’t care about them, to be honest. Seattle is a big city, only logical we’re not the only supernaturals here. This is not Beacon Hills and even in Beacon Hills, there were other supernaturals not in contact with the McCall Pack. If the other weres can’t keep their emotions in check and lash out, it’s not our problem. Sure, if we meet them again we might interfere and try to talk to them, but in the end, it’s their business. We have enough on our plate already.” Mason stared at him in wonder. “Wow, you're usually all about helping others.” “I am but how high are the chances any of us will meet this group again? It was one club in the city, it didn’t even happen in our closest environment. There are other packs out there except we are not the police for the supernaturals. They have to keep themselves in check and we have to worry about our pack. Landon may call us Avengers but we are not. It was fine back home but this city is just too large to police every other supernatural running around. And Caden already named it, we still haven’t figured out who wanted to run Liam over and who’s watching us. That is more important than some crazy were-creature.” Corey had a valid point. Theo nodded. “What we can do is call Chris Argent. Maybe he can check on that. It’s his profession, right?” “Who is Chris Argent?” Caden inquired. “He’s a hunter but a hunter only hunting the supernaturals posing as a threat for humans and good supernaturals. He’s on our side. I will try to get a hold off him tomorrow,” Liam explained.

****** Getting a hold off Chris Argent wasn’t that much of a problem. The problem was that he was busy with another werewolf problem somewhere in Canada. When Liam called to alert him of some supernaturals causing troubles in Seattle, he sighed brokenly and Liam could basically see the frown on the man’s face. “I will be honest with you, Liam, compared to what I’m about to deal with here, this sounds like child’s play. Doesn’t mean it’s not important but I’m currently hunting a group of werewolves who killed an entire party. Not one single person survived the attack. I hope the barkeeper will get well soon and I promise you I will check on it as soon as I can but for right now, I trust you to deal with the problem. Is that alright with you?” Really, what was Liam supposed to answer? That sounded really bad and clearly needed Argent’s attention. He had monitored the daily news in Seattle and no new reports about strange attacks or something surfaced so maybe it just had been one were on the loose. “Yeah, we can handle it, don’t worry. Just be careful up there.” “I have a backup, don’t worry,” Argent said grimly and ended the call. Liam sighed but then grabbed his gym back and met Mason by his car. He had promised his best friend a round of good training and that’s where they were heading now.

“We’re all on our own, okay. We handled wendigoes and psychotic witches, we can handle that as well. Or do you want to call Scott and ask for help?” Mason asked after Liam filled him in. “Help with what? There was one girl going crazy in a club and aside from the flashing eyes nothing supernatural happened. To call Scott to town would honestly be a bit too dramatic, don’t you think? Also, I’m the Alpha and don’t need another Alpha’s help with that.” Liam shook his head. “True. I have the utmost faith in you. You will manage whatever this turns out to be. You’re quite good at saving the day.” Liam laughed. “Thanks. Means a lot coming from you.”

The best friends joked around during the ride to the gym and even when they got out of the car. They made their way to the entrance when the door opened and a guy stepped out. He was bulky, had almost no neck, and a buzzcut. His skin was leathery and Liam would highly advise him to stop tanning so much if he had a say in this. When the guy left the gym he bumped into Mason. Mason huffed at the impact and even staggered a few steps back. “Whoa, dude!” The dude glared at him. “Don’t get into my way and you don’t have to worry about a thing,” he snapped at Mason and then continued his way over the parking lot. Liam and Mason stared after him. “The effects steroids have on people,” Mason grumbled and dusted off his shirt. He noticed Liam still staring after the guy. “Come on, don’t blow up, I’m fine.” But Liam shook his head. “It’s not that. I mean, I could kick his ass for being so rude to you but something about this guy was strange. His scent was strange.” “How so?” Mason asked curiously. “Don’t know. Since I learned to work with my wolf and pay closer attention to the world around me, there are some people whose scent is just off. Not just their chemosignals, just their natural scent. It’s off.” “In Germany, they say Jemanden nicht riechen können, which literally translates to not being able to smell somebody. It means you can’t stand a person. It’s very fitting.” The twenty-year-old gave Mason an amused look. “Always teaching me new things. How do you remember all this stuff?” “How do you remember historic stuff?” Mason asked back and laughed. He slung one arm around Liam’s shoulders. “Come on, the gym is waiting for us!”

****** Liam fried some meat in a pan and at the same time gave instructions to Mason. His best friend helped him in the kitchen tonight and Theo was currently laying the dinner table in the dining room. Again there were only Liam and his Betas, Landon was with a friend again. The two boys had a school project together and Landon would stay the night at his friend’s house. Liam would pick him up tomorrow. “The chicken is ready, I think we can already gather the others. Guys, dinner’s ready!!” Liam swayed the pan and carried it over to the table. Mason followed with the salad. The rest of the pack gradually filtered into the dining room and took their places. One look at the table and Liam realized they were missing the salad dressing and the tortillas for the wraps they were making. “I’ll help you get the tortillas,” Mason stated and followed Liam back into the kitchen where he grabbed the tortillas. Liam walked over to the fridge to get the dressing but then haltered in his movements.

He had pinned his copy of the picture Landon and him took at the zoo to the fridge and now that he looked at it, remembered something. “Something’s wrong?” He heard Mason ask behind him. Liam looked over his shoulder and pointed at the picture. “Remember the rude guy at the gym yesterday? I said his scent was off. It reminded me of something but I couldn’t put my finger on it. I just remembered. I caught the same smell at the zoo, only stronger. One of the habitats smelled like that.” He opened the fridge and grabbed the dressing. “You know which habitat it was? The hyenas’ habitat.” Liam closed the door again and Mason gave him an impressive look. “You sure?” “I am absolutely sure,” Liam confirmed while the friends walked back into the dining room. “What are you absolutely sure of?” Theo had overheard the last part of their conversation and now was eager to get an answer. “The guy at the gym yesterday, his scent was the same as the one surrounding the hyenas’ habitat at the zoo.”

“Uhm, that’s nice, baby?” They all looked at Liam like he had lost his mind and he realized they could absolutely not follow him or get why this was worth talking about. He didn’t know it himself. But something told him, it was worth mentioning. Tim came to Liam’s aid. “See? You meet a guy smelling like a hyena, I meet a group laughing like hyenas. Coincidence? I think not!” “Or maybe, and I’m just putting this out there, you two are just a tiny bit neurotic and need to lay down for a while?” Mike interfered. “Who cares how people laugh or smell?” Mason looked from Tim to Liam. “Your mind is reeling. You’ve got that look on your face, like always when you’re piecing something together. What are you thinking about?”

Liam would admit freely he wasn’t the brightest and there were other people smarter and more intelligent than him in this pack. But every now and then his mind got on a roll and he came up with a theory. Sometimes crazy but no matter the times, his theories always managed to capture Liam’s interest. He just had a hard time voicing his thoughts, so he shrugged. “We have a group of unknown weres in the city. People smell like a certain animal and even laugh like that animal. Do were-hyenas exist?” He finally concluded lamely, put the dressing on the table and sat down.

His friends laughed, except for Theo, who just stared at him. “You might not be wrong,” the twenty-two-year-old finally said calmly. “What?” When everybody laughed, Liam had realized how ridiculous that had sounded and already discarded the thought. It had been dumb anyway. But that Theo took it serious surprised him. “We know there are different kinds of weres. Wolves, coyotes, chameleons, jaguars, lions. Who says there aren’t more we know nothing about? Also, keep in mind, there is a group of unknown weres running around. I wouldn’t pass the possibility of them being were-hyenas completely aside.” “Theo, I was just making a silly comment. There are no such things as were-hyenas.” “You said that about werewolves once too.” Liam’s eye twitched. Theo beat him at his own game and used Liam’s own history and arguments against him. He didn’t like it one bit. Mason had to help! “Mase, did you ever came across were-hyenas during your studies?” Mason shook his head. “No, but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist. We both know this is not really a science, Lee.” “See,” Liam crooned triumphantly but then his face faltered. “Hey, you’re supposed to be on my side!” “I am on your side, you both are saying the same thing.” “Oh and if you didn’t read about them who could possibly help us?” Liam asked sarcastically. “Scott maybe?” Nolan offered from his place. “Or he could ask Deaton.”

If Liam was honest with himself, he was kind of curious if he had been right. If he had been, he could chalk it up as one of the little times he had been right on the first try. So he went to fetch his cellphone and called Scott while he returned to the dining room again. Scott picked up after the fourth ring. “Liam, hello!” “Hey, Scott, I hope I’m not disturbing you or something. You’re on speaker, by the way, the pack can hear you too.” “Hello, guys! No, you’re not disturbing, I’m just at Derek’s loft, having pizza with Malia.” “Hello, stranger!” Malia called from the background while Liam’s Betas also greeted Scott and Malia. “Scott, I’ll make it quick, it’s just a tiny question. Do you know if there are other types of weres out there than we already know?” Liam questioned and Scott was silent for a while. “Aside from wolves, coyotes, jaguars and such?” “Aside from them, yeah,” Theo confirmed. “I don’t know. I never met other types than the ones we knew. Not in Beacon Hills and not anywhere else. Has this something to do with you calling Chris, Liam?” “We’re trying to figure this out ourselves. See, we had some encounters all around the city that makes us think there might be were-hyenas. They share certain traits with the animals, the people we met, and since there is a group of unknown weres in the city, it was just a silly thought. Maybe you could have helped us but we will figure it out ourselves.” “What do they smell like?” Malia asked. Scott seemingly had also put the call on speaker. “Like the hyena habitat in the zoo, just a bit fainter.” “I never met someone smelling like a hyena. It must smell weird.” “It does smell weird,” Liam agreed with her on that one. “Maybe it’s just us getting a bit paranoid. There are always things happening and we’re looking for an explanation. We’re probably just throwing everything together while in reality, it’s completely unrelated.” Liam was backpedaling. His theory had been silly from the start and that it was now turning into this expert talk was embarrassing for Liam.

“You should probably ask somebody who actually knows things.” Liam jumped in his seat when the voice of no other than Peter Hale came through the speakers. “Oh yeah, Peter is here too,” Scott cheerfully announced. “Yeah, thanks for the heads up,” Liam mumbled. “You said we should ask somebody who knows things. Figured you’re talking about yourself, hm?” Theo now asked Peter. Peter chuckled lowly. “I suppose you could continue to ask around, maybe someone else can give you the answer in a few months. Probably years. Yeah, years is more likely.” “You do not know the answers to all questions of the universe,” Malia snubbed but her father ignored her. “I’m in a good mood today so I will share part of my knowledge with you. Gather round, children, this will be educational.” “He sounds like an adult Theo sometimes,” Sadie noticed. Theo stared indignantly at her. “What did I ever do to you?” “Shh,” Liam hissed. He wanted to hear what Peter was willing to share. “To answer your initial question: Yes, there are indeed were-hyenas out there. There are actually many kinds of weres out there, some you never heard of. Tigers, bears, leopards, just to name a few. That’s where the problem starts. You must understand, there is a hierarchy between the weres. On top are the strong ones like wolves or lions, us wolves being the better species obviously.” Malia growled lowly in the background. Peter ignored his daughter. “For most weres this is fine but there are some of the lower weres who feel cheated about their place in the food chain. Some coyotes share this mindset but they are mostly loners so they rarely act out on this, but hyenas, for example, clearly belong to the ones unsatisfied with their stance. They have a deep-rooted hatred for the ones standing above them and they live to cause trouble for them.” “Define trouble,” Corey cut in sharply. “All kinds of stuff. Hyenas live to cause havoc, they’re belligerent, aggressive, and they want to change the hierarchy in their favor. In order to do that, nothing is off limits for them. They’re dangerous, mostly because they are shifty.” “So trouble could mean watching someone from the shadows and trying to run an Alpha over with a car?” Maya guessed. Scott shrieked. “Somebody tried to run you over with a car??” “I’m fine, Scott,” Liam called out. “Peter, since you know so much about hyenas, do you know anything about how they attack? It would be good to know that to be prepared.” “They won’t attack you. They are cowards. Hyenas are always in a group and rarely alone but even as a group they would not attack a werewolf, less alone a pack of wolves. They will continue to make your life difficult until they lose interest and leave town again. That’s what they do. You surely can fight them but if hyenas are threatened, they will fight back and they bite. They fight unfair, that you should be worried about. Little ankle biters. Nasty creatures. They will search for your weakness and use it against you.” “So your advice is to do nothing and ride it out?” Sadie needed clarification. “I’m not telling you what to do. I admit, seeing you get pummeled by a pack of hyenas would be hilarious to see. Don’t give me that look, Scott, your former Beta is not the most impressive Alpha around.” “I just don’t understand why they targeted us. You said they hate all wolves but we did nothing to them.” Tim could not wrap his head around that part. Peter sighed. “Your Alpha is very young, you all are. It makes sense they see you as less of a threat than a pack with an older, more experienced Alpha.” Liam gritted his teeth. He was getting tired of people underestimating him just because of his age. It was getting old. He may be young but he already had some accomplishments, okay? People needed to give him some credit. “Thank you, Peter. Scott, talk to you soon.” He ended the call and leaned back in his chair.

“What’s on your mind?” Theo asked and put a hand on Liam’s knee. “I’m pissed. Pissed at people assuming it is okay to target my pack because I’m just twenty years old and not the tallest guy on the field. I’m pissed because me being me brings problems to my pack. I hate it!” “Hey, no, this is not your fault. You heard what Peter said about hyenas. They are supernatural bullies and pick on who they deem weak because they feel picked on themselves,” Lori hurried to encourage her Alpha. “But they picked us because I’m just me,” Liam argued back. “And they will see how wrong they have been. We are strong, Liam, and we are because you are strong, Alpha. You hold us all together. They don’t know who they’re messing with,” Theo backed Lori up and squeezed Liam’s leg. “Let them come and make our life miserable, we will get through this. I mean, this wolf would love to snatch a hyena but I’m also okay with waiting until they come to us.” Sadie shrugged. “The question is if they come or if they continue to lurk in the shadows. To me, their behavior is absolutely not logical.” Mason shook his head. “Really? To me, it is very logical,” Theo answered, “I mean, step one was clearly just watching us. Step two is slowly making themselves known. They’re like we are here now, are you scared? and they will become more and more prominent, just to annoy us. There is a system behind. Maybe they think it intimidates us, who knows?” "It’s good that we now know what they are and what they want. It makes us more cautious. I still would say we continue with our lives as if nothing happened. If they want to tease us and get a reaction out of us, just doing what we normally do and ignoring they’re lurking might probably make them so mad they leave cause they didn’t get a rise out of us.” Corey, in his role as the consultant, always the voice of reason. “Uh, ignoring the problem until it goes away. I’m a fan of that,” Mike said jokingly. Liam was still pissed but even he had to admit Corey was right. Maybe this time they didn’t have to fight and could sit out the problem. Maybe one time they could have the luck on their side. He sincerely hoped so.

****** Liam strolled into the coffee shop and smiled. Theo was working the late shift on this day and he had decided to pay his boyfriend a little visit. Only three tables were occupied and nobody was ordering at the counter. Theo was wiping the machine but he stopped when Liam walked in and smiled at the young Alpha. “Is your boss still here?” Liam inquired. “Left an hour ago,” Theo informed and smirked. He rounded the corner to meet Liam there and wrap his arms around his boyfriend’s waist. “Good. So I can do that.” Liam grabbed Theo by the collar of his shirt and dragged him into a deep kiss. Theo’s hold on him tightened and he kissed Liam back with fervor. Theo’s boss would have probably yelled at them for making a disgusting scene but since she wasn’t here Liam saw no problem in kissing his boyfriend. The two elderly women at one table even whooped at them so they must give a nice picture.

The bell above the door announced new customers and several pair of steps told the Alpha couple a group had arrived. The steps stopped in front of the counter and suddenly a scornful scoff sounded up. The couple broke apart and turned their heads. The group’s members ware all about the same age as Liam; three guys, all looking like the newest issue of Rich White Guys and two girls, one with black hair and one brunette. The girls looked like they could give Blair Waldorf a run for her money. Literally, both could have been the main characters in Gossip Girl. Their outfits were expensive as hell, the brunette one had a designer bag hanging off her elbow, wore a plaided miniskirt, a white blouse with a yellow bow matching her skirt, and her makeup, as well as her manicure, was perfectly executed. She had her perfectly shaped eyebrow raised and looked Liam up and down, her full lips twisted in a sneery smirk.

“Can I help you?” Theo asked. “Want to order something?” She ignored him and rather addressed Liam. “You are the most unimpressive Alpha I’ve ever met.” Liam raised an eyebrow and let go of Theo. “Excuse me?” “I mean, you are so normal. We have class.” She pointed at her friends and herself. They all snickered maliciously. “Which makes me wonder even more why you wolves are on top while we have to scrape at the bottom.” It clicked who they were. “Oh, so you are the hyenas.” The black-haired girl nudged her friend. “Did you hear that? He knows who we are. Our reputation caught up with us.” The other girl laughed. “We are just that perfect.” “Oh come on, we had our fair share of arrogant women this year already,” Theo scolded. “Listen, I have no idea what your problem is, but I suggest you get a good therapist and leave us alone. We didn’t do anything so let us live in peace and be bitchy somewhere else.” The brunette one glared at him and raised her hand to press her fingers together at the tips. “Don’t talk to me ever again. You are nothing more than the Alpha’s bitch and you’re really not worth my time. I talk to the Alpha and the Alpha alone.” Liam growled. “Want to say those things about my mate again?” He snarled, ready to stalk over and slap her self-righteous smile off her face. But Theo held him back. “Liam, no. They’re not worth your breath.” The hyenas giggled and she continued to insult the couple. “Actually, you both are not worth my time. Just know this, we deserve to be at the top and we will do what it takes to get there. You wolves lived long enough on the sunny side, it’s our turn now. Be warned.” She flashed her eyes in the same pale, indescribable color Maya had told the pack about, then she turned around on her heels and the group marched out of the shop. Liam growled again, his wolf was ready to pounce. “Want to take this outside and see who will come up on top?” She just giggled again and then said something Liam didn’t quite get. “Sorry? What did you say?” She turned around in the doorway, a fake smile on her face. “I said your little brother is very cute.” Then she started laughing, alongside her friends, and left the shop. Tim had been right, they really laughed like their animalistic counterparts. Liam snarled and lunged forward but Theo wrapped both arms around his waist. “There are humans in the shop, there are humans in the shop,” he told Liam repeated and pulled him flush against his chest. Liam pressed his face against his mate’s shoulder and closed his eyes. Everything inside him screamed to run after her and rip her apart but Theo was right, he only would expose werewolves again. “I’m here. It’s okay,” Theo mumbled into his ear and stroked over his hair. Well, Liam wasn’t so sure of that.

****** He laid in bed and stared at the ceiling. The night had been short, Liam didn’t sleep long, and then he had laid there and watched the light at the ceiling turn greyish pink and then brighter while the sun rose more and more. The encounter with the hyenas yesterday played in his mind like a broken record and he couldn’t shake it off. So he laid there and pondered about all the possibilities this could go while he played with the strands of his hair absentmindedly.

“You barely slept during the night. What’s on your mind?” Theo said softly. He laid on his side, facing Liam, and watched his boyfriend. Liam didn’t reply and kept in twisting his hair between his fingertips ere he sat up. “I made the decision to bring Landon out of town,” he announced brokenly. “What?” Theo sat up too and put a hand on Liam’s shoulder. “Why?” Liam braced his arms on his tucked up knees. When he now looked at Theo, he looked sad. “I have no idea what these hyenas are going to do. Peter said they’re going for our weaknesses. Landon is human and he is a child. I could never forgive myself if something happened to him. I can protect all of you but only to a certain point. I know you guys can take care of yourself but what is he supposed to do? No, I rather bring him out of town and know he is safe. The minute it’s safe to come back, I will get him again but for now, I have to make sure nothing happens to Landon.” “And where will you take him?” “The lake. There is no safer place for him than there.” Liam wiped his eyes. “I see if he’s awake and tell him to pack.” “Are you really sure about this, Lee?” “It’s the only option. Imagine them kidnapping him. He endured so much already in his young life, he doesn’t need another traumatic experience.” Theo seemed to understand. He gave him a comforting smile and kissed his cheek and then Liam rolled out of bed and left the room.

Liam slowly opened the door to Landon’s room after a soft knock and peeked inside. Landon said on the floor and solved a puzzle. When he spotted Liam, he smiled brightly. “Good morning!” “Good morning.” Liam stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. He smiled sadly. “Laddie, I need to talk to you.” “Sure.” Landon moved away from his puzzle and looked expectantly at his big brother. Liam felt his heart actually break a little bit. He needed to do this and he decided to not beat around the bush. He crouched down in front of Landon and put his hands on his baby brother’s shoulders. “I want you to know that I love you and I will never stop loving you. But there are bad people out there and I have to fight them. They are mean and very devious and I cannot let them continue. But I can only fight them when I know you are safe. You’re not safe when you’re staying in Seattle.” He exhaled loudly. “Therefore I have to bring you out of town, okay? To know you are safe there and I can fight the bad guys. Do you understand that?” Landon listened and his eyes filled with tears. “But I don’t want to leave you! Please, don’t send me away!” Liam felt his own eyes stinging with tears. “I want you around all the time but it is too dangerous for you right now! I promise you, as soon as the bad guys are gone, I’ll bring you back home. Please, don’t think I don't want you around. I love you so much, Landon, but I have to protect you. I need to protect you.” “Where are you taking me?” Lanson’s voice was quivering and he cried. “To a beautiful place. You meet the rest of my pack and they are awesome. You will love it there. It has a wonderful lake and nature around is just so amazing. I always loved being there. And again, as soon as it’s safe here again, I will take you back here.” Liam now cried as well and hugged his brother tightly. Landon clung to him. “Do you still love me, Liam?” “I will never stop loving you. You’re my little brother, we always stick together. And we will talk and video chat every day, okay? Just because we’re not together doesn’t mean we can’t talk. You can always call me. I want you to know that.” He felt Landon nod. “I know that. I love you, Liam. Why can’t we both live at the lake?” “I wish we could, Landon, but it’s not possible right now. I know this is all too much and happens so fast but somebody has to stop them.” They hugged for some moments longer and then they separated again. Liam smiled weakly. “Get dressed and I get dressed and then I will help you pack your stuff and then we will drive.” The young boy nodded and wiped his tears away. It was just as hard for him as it was for Liam.

The rest of the morning was quiet and solemn and when it was finally time for the brothers' departure all pack members hugged Landon and wished him the best. Liam helped Landon put his bags in his car and then Landon hopped in on the passenger seat. “I can come with you, support you,” Theo offered. “No, I need you here as Second Alpha when I’m gone in case those hyenas show their ugly faces. I will be okay.” Liam kissed his boyfriend goodbye and then got into the driver’s seat of his car. The pack had gathered in the driveway and they waved when the car slowly rolled into the street. Liam saw some of his Betas wiping away their tears. They all had become fond of Landon and it was hard letting him go, even if it was for his safety.

“Tell me about where you’re bringing me, please,” Landon prompted after they had been on the road for a while. “It’s a beautiful lake with woods around and the people live there in cozy cabins. It is actually where I became an Alpha after the former Alpha transferred his power to me. The rest of my pack lives there and you will come to love them as much as me. They are good people and I wouldn’t be the Liam I am today without them. They helped me a lot, mostly Byron, he is the former Alpha.” Liam glanced at Landon. “You know I’m not sending you away because I don’t want you around but because I want you to be safe, right?” “I know.” Landon looked out of the window. “It’s because of those stupid evil people.” “Yeah. As soon as they are defeated, I will bring you back home and we will do all the things we want. Going to the zoo again, the cinema, eating lots of ice cream. Everything you want.” Landon turned his head and looked at Liam. “You promise me this? That you come back?” “Of course. Hey, you are my little brother, I love to have you around.” He went for a comforting smile but Landon still didn’t seem sold. “I didn’t mean if you meant to come and get me. Do you promise me to come back and not die? Please, don’t die like mom.” It came as a shock to Liam that his brother was thinking in that direction. Then again, he should have seen it coming. He pulled his car to the side of the road and halted there. Once the vehicle stopped, Liam turned in his seat to face Landon. “I promise, no I swear, that I will come back to you. I won’t be dying for a long time. We have way too much stuff to do and adventures to experience for me to die soon. You’re not losing me that quickly.” Liam reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out the little wooden wolf Byron had once gifted him. “Here. Byron gave me this wolf when I had a difficult time and now I want to give it to you. It means you’re never alone, I’m always with you, even though we are apart. And it can remind you of my promises to come back.” He held the wolf out and Landon took it with shaky hands. He turned it around and ran his fingers over the wood. “It’s beautiful. You really want to give me this? It was a gift to you.” “Byron won’t mind. He will understand why I gave it to you.” “Thank you, Liam.” The brothers hugged over the console and Liam kissed the top of Landon’s head.

****** Liam always loved arriving at the lake and no matter how often he went there, it never lost its beauty but today a big part of him just wished it wasn’t for such a sad reason to drop his brother off. He knew it was the right decision, Landon’s safety was the most important thing, but that didn’t mean it was any less hard. He parked in front of Byron’s and Lana’s house and got out of the car. Lana was in the front and tended to her flowers. Once she spotted Liam, she looked surprised. “Liam, I wasn’t aware you would be coming. Is everything okay?” “Hey, Lana.” He hugged her. “Is Byron there too?” “He is. Byron! Can you come here, please? Liam’s here!” She called into the open front door. Soon enough Byron appeared and he looked as confused as his wife. “Liam, always great to see you but your face tells me something is wrong.” The young Alpha looked back to his car. “Landon, it’s okay, you can come here.” The child slowly followed his invite and stepped around the car. He smiled shyly at Lana and Byron and finally grasped Liam’s hand. Liam focused on the former Alpha couple. “I told you about Landon when we last talked. I now need you to take my little brother in for a while. Please.” Lana switched from surprised to worried. “Maybe we should sit down and then you explain. Follow me, I have some fresh lemonade.”

And so the four of them found themselves in the living room and Liam explained everything to Lana and Byron. “I don’t know how serious she really was but what she said clearly targeted Landon and I’m not having it. I cannot be around Landon 24/7, none of us can, but I need him to be safe. If something happened to Landon, I would lose my freaking mind. Yes, sending him away hurts me but it is the best decision I can make at this point. I know, what I’m asking for has a huge impact on your life, but I don’t know where else to take him so he’s safe,” he finally ended. “Liam, when I asked you to become my successor and you agreed, it changed your entire life. There is nothing you could ask from us that would be too much. And we will happily give Landon a home and protect him while you take care of the hyenas,” Byron explained in his usual calm and collected ways. Landon smiled shyly. “Thank you. Your house is very nice, I like the colors. You surely won’t mind having me around?” “You are as polite and amazing as your brother so we will love to have you around,” Lana assured him. “You can have our guest room and we will get you some toys and things you need. I know the teacher of the local school, he can go there, we will take care of everything.” “I will give you the money for everything,” Liam offered immediately. Lana huffed. “Don’t be silly. We have that covered. You have other things to take care of right now.”

Liam smiled gratefully at her and she patted his knee. Then she smiled warmly at Landon. “Want me to introduce you to the pack and show you around?” Landon nodded but then glanced questioningly at Liam. The twenty-year-old nodded encouragingly. “Go ahead. I will stick around for a few hours before I drive back to Seattle.” His baby brother smiled. “Okay.” And then he followed Lana.

Byron and Liam followed a little bit behind.

“Will this ever get easier?” Liam asked the former Alpha. His heart was still breaking to know he would leave Landon behind. “Decisions like that? No,” Byron denied. “They only would get easier if you stopped caring, simply because you would not care enough to make them. And that is not the type of person you are.” “It tears me apart to leave without Landon. I trust all of you and I know he will have a wonderful time here but leaving him just hurts so damn much. I hope we can get rid of the hyenas soon and he can come back.” Byron gave Liam a pat on the back. “If you need any help, you know we’re just one call away.” He gave the older man a crooked smile. “I know.” Liam turned serious again. “It just annoys me so much that people constantly think they can overpower me because of my age or my looks.” “But this a problem of our society. People have a certain image of what somebody is supposed to be. If you don’t fit in the image, they think it’s okay to walk over you. I wish I could say it will stop one day but there will always be people underestimating you. The only thing you can do is to pick your battles and prove them wrong in the way right for you. I know you have a bright future ahead as Alpha of your pack, Liam. I can’t wait to see what you will do with this pack in the next years. We all are eager to see and we all support you. No matter if you’re twenty or fifty.” It helped Liam to talk with Byron and hear those words. Having people look down on you didn’t help your self-esteem but having people believing in him did. They all counted on him and he had great support. “Thank you, Byron.”

****** Landon got a warm welcome from the rest of the pack and the other kids immediately accepted him in their group and they began to play. Liam smiled when he saw Landon so carefree and happy. It was the right decision.

But then it was time to say goodbye and the brother found each other hugging tightly. Liam tried to will down the tears, he didn’t want to make this harder for Landon than it already was. “I love you so much, buddy,” he whispered into his brother's ear and Landon sniffled. “I love you too, Liam. Please be careful.” Liam smiled and ran a hand through Landon’s hair when they parted. “I will be.” He slowly got up to his full height and hugged Byron and Lana. “Thank you again, guys.” “No need to thank us. Be careful and if you need help, call us.” “Yeah.” Liam waved. “Bye. And, Landon, I will call you tonight.” The boy nodded eagerly. “We will talk every night over the phone and tell us about our days. Starting tonight.” “Exactly. Be nice to Byron and Lana and do good in school. Bye.” He hugged the kid one last time then he got into his car. He waved out of the rolled-down window, the former Alpha couple and Landon waved back, and the car slowly drove towards the street. He waved until he couldn’t see them anymore.

When he was finally on the highway, Liam called Theo over the speakerphone. His mate immediately picked up. “Hey, I’m on my way home. Everything okay?” His voice was thick with emotions. “Everything quiet, no hyena showed up. Are you okay?” Theo asked softly. Liam took a deep breath and fought back the tears. “He is happy and safe, that’s all that matters. It still hurts though.” “I can imagine. Are you okay to drive? I can come and pick you up with Mason.” “No need, I will be fine. There is not much traffic, I should be home soon. And then I’m ready to kick some hyenas’ asses.”

At least, the new danger now has a name and a face. Also, I was bawling when writing the last part of the chapter. What have I done? But on the other hand, Liam now can focus on the threat at hand and believe me, they have no idea who they're messing with. Like stated in the chapter, people underestimate him and that is never a good idea. What do you think? As always comments/theories/wishes/and what else you can think of are highly appreciated! I hope you don't hate me too much for this emotional rollercoaster I sent us all on.

Love you guys!

#Thiam #Morning Dew Pack series #A tale written with fangs and claws #My writing #alpha!liam #let's continue this wild ride #I am sponsering tissues in case anybody needs them

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fweeble · 6 years ago

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Episode 3: Across the River and into the Trees

Hello, I’m Fwee, a mature and responsible adult who is absolutely not imitating a Labrador wagging its entire butt with its tail. Of course not. It’s rude of you to assume I am. Honestly. I’m just here, with my drinks and tissues and pillows, watching some Nanner Fish. A normal hoomun.

This is The Episode, if I’ve got my timing right!

A second in and already more beautiful scenery. Thank you, Mappa! The prison looks so much better in the morning. A screenshot from last episode for comparison:

Impressive.

Is anyone familiar with legalese because this sounds like a giant lie. Does anyone know????

Hirata Hiroaki is doing an amazing job. My heart. This is exactly the Max Lobo I heard in my head whenever I read Nanner Fish. Q vQ <3

Max in a nutshell, guys. Never change, Max. Never change.

You survived ‘Nam, Max, you can survive prison. Or Iraq. Afghanistan? Nope, I was right. It’s Iraq in the anime timeline. You have swole army arms, Max! Swole!

Charlie absolutely not bringing up the fact that, unlike many in the prison (most likely), he’s army trained.

Eiji: Master of the Oblivious Guilt Tripping. He’s a nine-dan.

I absolutely believe that Max picked that book just as a token symbol of protest. Because Max is nothing if not a drama queen.

To be fair, Max, you have 15 years on the kid. Just roll with it.

Oh Max, no. Your happy puppy expression hurts me. This is Ash Lynx, Max. His words hurt.

I warned you. Q vQ

That’s Ash, Max. It’ll never grow on you, but you’ll get used to it. Or not.

I’m sorry. I’m laughing so hard. Elite hoodlum. What’s even better is that every time they say “chinpira” I think of a low level yakuza with a popped collar, horrendously flashy shirts (think tiger button ups), and a blazer. Super imposing that onto Ash is hilarious and the best thing.

Gorgeous. Gorgeous. *blows kisses at Mappa*

*hysterical laughter*

Live in hope, Max, live in hope. Your dreams are going to be your only salvation.

Ash’s face. *SNERK*

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaash. Maaaaaaaaaaaaax. Max, breathe.

0 to 9,000. Good job, Ash! I’m laughing at that carrot that overlaps with Ash’s leg: the colors are so close they blend, it loses its third dimension and looks an awful lot like confetti. Let’s pretend everyone is celebrating that Ash kicked this creep in the face.

Charlie owes you several lifetimes’ worth of big times, Max. You just don’t know it yet.

I’m left to believe that these guards are very incompetent. The true crime shows I watch has lead me to believe that guards are supposed to pat down inmates before they’re allowed back into their cells or solitary. That, or I’ve been lied to.

Or: Ash is very good at squirreling away forks.

It’s probably a little of each column, huh.

PLOOOOOOOOT!!!

OKAY GUYS, A TINY BIT OF BACKGROUND SINCE I DON’T WANT TO SPEND TOO MUCH TIME ON THIS. BE WARNED, SOME POTENTIAL SPOILERS AHEAD:

So, in the original manga, this was set right after the Vietnam War, during a period in which the US govt was doing some skeevy shit (not that it is absolutely squeaky clean now, but that’s another thing entirely) which included MK Ultra. If y’all want a quick and dirty low-down on MK Ultra, just check out Wiki. Anyways, this is significant because the govt’s drug of choice was LSD, it occurred around the same time period as the ‘Nam War, and their goal was, well...

If you were aware of these things while reading the manga, this was a huge clue as to what “Banana Fish” might actually be. This is one of the huge weaknesses in bringing the show into the present day, I think, since it loses some of this nuance. But that’s just me being nit-picky, I guess.

BACK TO THE SHOW: You are most definitely correct, Dr. Meredith, without a doubt.

Still the 5 billion dollar question, Ash. The question everyone wants answered.

*strangled noises* So beautiful. So much awful. Why this juxtaposition.

*screeches* BAD TOUCH DINO, BAD TOUCH DINO, BAD TOOOOUCH.

CSMDKFMWOIFJMDSLKF. LOOKIT THIS TINY BABY CHILD!! SAVE HIIIIIIM! SAVE HIM!!!!

SOMEONE LOP OFF DINO’S GROSS HAND. MCLKSDMFLSDF.

Skiiiiiippppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeer......

MY HEART. THEY DID SUCH A GOOD JOB IMPROVING ON THIS IN THE ANIME. The manga comparison:

I BELIEVE IN YOU, ASH.

BOOOOOOOO. THEY TONED DOWN ASH’S SASS!

THIS IS THE SASSY BOY I KNOW AND LOVE. I REMEMBER YOU, ASH! *blows kisses*

Or this was a decision the translator made for the manga. Either way, infinitely more fond of this interpretation. u vu <3

One: HNNNNNG, GORGEOUS. I LOVE ALL THE DETAIL ON THE STAIRWELL, DO PRISON STAIRWELLS ACTUALLY LOOK THIS LOVELY???

Two: CMKSLDMFLSFD. Fucking hell.

Even the books on their shelves are beautifully rendered. *totally missing the point*

Doc, please never treat a rape survivor like this. 8/

The way Ash asks for a capsule will never fail to make me giggle. He sounds like a spoiled child.

*sighs* I know this is the same background but I seriously love the textures for the room. Mappa really is outdoing themselves.

Resident asshole cook, Sanji, is channeling his captain, Luffy, in a New York prison and about to summarily get his ass stabbed by a pissed off blond child with no time for shenanigans: more at 12.

*wriggles in seat with excitement* *plays the maracas* WHO’S EXCITED.

Hmmmmm, new exposition to match the Iraq timeline, huh? Interesting.

Wait, is this the new reason why they head to LA?

Oooooor not???

Just new exposition for the new Iraq plot line???

Seriously, the art direction!!! *BLOWS SO MANY KISSES AT MAPPA*

Oh, my heart. My soft, squishy, little baby heart.

*clutches chest* Ash... *makes strangled dying manatee noises about all the reasons why Ash has so many trust issues*

ASH, PLEASE...

Just leave me to drown in this salty sea of tears.

*helpless hysterical giggling* Ash sure is turning on the charm.

Well... to be fair... both are one year away from majority in their homelands, so... maybe, emotionally around the same place?

Ash’s love and loyalty for his boys. *clenches fist* I have feelings and they are strong.

Fuck Arthur with a spiked baseball bat. 8(

Oh, Max... so much of your life is wrapped up in guilt... 8( 8( 8(

Oh my fucking god, the music. *light porn disco music starts*

*cracking up*

SOMEONE SAVE ME I CAN’T BREATHE I AM LAUGHING SO HARD. THE MUSIC, THE AMOUNT OF TIME THAT PASSES. ASH CASUALLY STROKING EIJI’S FACE AND HAIR. EIJI JUST GOING ?????? LIKE A DEER CAUGHT IN HEADLIGHTS. AHAHAHAHAHAHA. *wheezes*

EIJI, YOU’VE GOT THE REFLEXES OF A CAT TWO YEARS DEAD AND BURIED.

LITERAL TEARS. AHAHAHAHAHAHA. IBE, CHARLIE --YOUR FACES!!!

YoI babies, please don’t expect anything more than this if the anime sticks to the mango. Y’all won’t get more hanky panky than this.

THE SILENT CONVERSATION! O vO

THE FUCKING WINK AND STAR. I’M DYING. MAPPA PLEASE.

ARREST THEM AND CHARGE THEM FOR MY MURDER.

IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK, IBE!

Eh, you may be right on that point.

I love Ibe. I love his face. Heeee.

The #1 thing I took away from Nanner Fish about prisons was that capsules are invaluable and that I should French kiss my besties as a way to pass messages. My messages would probably be screaming for help, but that’s just me. I wouldn’t last in prison.

Look at that reflection on the picture hung on the wall??? Hnnnnnnnnnnng. Mappa, please. You’re doing indecent things to my heart.

*more strangled noises over Mappa’s gorgeous backgrounds*

Booooooo. Eiji, you’re going out in that?

#1 thing I will miss about original Nanner Fish mango is Eiji looking 80′s fabulous as he goes into Chinatown.

But mostly this:

ICONIC.

WOULDN’T IT BE MELTED BY THE TIME HE GOT BACK, IBE????

HOLY SHIT, MAPPA. YOU’RE TRYING TO KILL ME.

*high pitched noises* Lookit that. That’s gorgeous. Dino’s a leazebag but that’s... hnnnnng.

Wait, are you wearing the same clothing, Arthur?

(He is.)

It’s okay. Your voice is the only lovely thing about you. Keep talking.

Smooth as fine chocolate. u 3u

One: Fuck off, Arthur.

Two: *HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER* THE SOFT PORN DISCO MUSIC IS BACK. Not quite Hawaiian shirt, but A+++ for effort.

*cries* You’re so pink, Eiji.

LOOKIT HIS PANTS. HIS CUTE BANANA LEAF PANTS. EIJI, PLEASE.

Fuck Arthur. Leave my Shorter alone.

Y’all aren’t gonna tell him to be careful about using Shorter’s name?

I AM SO RELIEVED THEY LEFT NADIA’S CHARACTER DESIGN ALONE. HI NADIAAAA.

CRYING. YOU ARE SO CUTE, MR. CHANG.

SERIOUSLY, THAT ATTENTION TO DETAIL. MUWAH. Also: suspicious person alert. Poor Eiji isn’t trained for counter-surveillance. Q vQ

I’D LIKE SOME FREE WONTON SOUP TOO, MR. CHANG. PLEASE.

Don’t forget Ibe’s sundae, Eiji!!

*blows kisses at Mappa*

*dying manatee noises* Maaaaaaaaaaaax. Q AQ

*blows even more kisses at Mappa* Muwah. Muwah. u 3u <3

All together with me: FUCK OOOOOOOOOOOOFF ARTHUUUUUUUR.

But boy am I in love with your voice. u vu <3

Episode 3 is over and I’m excited for episode 4! More of my boy Shorter~~ Yes, good. I’m excited!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It’s been a super long day, so I hope y’all have had a better day than me! <3

<<Episode 2 Masterlist Episode 4>>

#Fandom: Banana Fish #Banana Fish #Nanner Fish Liveblog #spoilers #tw: spoilers

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of-rats-and-asters · 7 years ago

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Fanfiction: Welcome to the real world -chapter 3

Chap. 1 / Chap. 2 / Hi everyone! First things first, I want to thank Glittercracker once again for the *amazing* beta-reading. Thank you so much for bearing with me and my awkward mistakes lmao. Also thanks to voxiferious for the help with some vulgar expressions XD And also thanks to you all, readers! I am amazed to see this story seems to interest quite a lot of people, this is very gratifying ! All kudos, comments and bookmarks mean a lot and keep me going! Thank you all! Once again I hope you'll enjoy this chapter!

“You’re crazy”.

“Safu! Let me explain at least!”

“He’s the most dangerous convict we’re currently hosting. Possibly the most dangerous convict we’ve ever hosted. He was put in jail for a freaking murder attempt! For God’s sake Shion, what are you thinking?”

Shion let out a tired sigh. “First, he was only suspected of murder attempt, no proof has been made against him. They put him in jail for the violence and prostitution – let me speak!”

She didn’t understand him. Shion had come after work once again to discuss the arrival of VC-103221. She had heard of this Nezumi long before he came to their establishment. As a psychiatrist, the federals had asked her opinion on Nezumi’s transfer to the NCIR. She had never hidden her concern about the project. Criminals who showed no remorse, no fear of authority were prone to backslide. However, she hadn’t been the one deciding, and here she was now in this delicate situation. Shion was known for his kind heart and optimistic mind. But both as his best friend and a practitioner, she was worried for him. Nezumi’s outburst against Arugo earlier this day had led to a formal investigation. Several testimonies had shown that Arugo had been the one starting the fight. But it didn’t excuse Nezumi for his violence. It was his second day in the facility, and Nezumi was already making waves… Shion knew well that during the next weekly meeting, there would be demands for a psychiatric examination on him. And for some reason, he had come to ask Safu to volunteer.

“I hope you realise this is corruption. This is a serious matter, Shion, I don’t understand you.”

Shion looked down at his fingers, twisting them. His voice was soft and a tiny smile was showing on his lips.

“He’s… uncanny, for sure.” Shion’s gaze rose to meet Safu’s. “But I swear, I feel it deep inside me, he’s not a bad man. He’s full of wrath but… he looks like he had such a tough life. He deserves more time. To adjust. To get to know us. But…”

“But he’s an insolent, infuriating and provocative jerk. Shion…” Safu huffed before taking her head in her hands. “What are you doing to me? OKAY. I’ll volunteer.” Shion’s face brightened immediately. He looked like a puppy who just saw his owner bringing the leash for the morning walk.

“Thank you Safu, I love you so much, you’re the best.” He took her warmly in his arms. As her head laid on his shoulder, he missed the bittersweet expression on her face. “Yeah, Shion… me too…”

Nezumi woke up with his heart beating fast and sweat rolling between his shoulder blades. The air was fresh and he was shivering. He guessed he must have had another nightmare but he couldn’t remember it. And for all he knew, he didn’t care. Only the present mattered. He extended his arm to fetch the clock, and saw it was only 4 am. He had awoken almost an hour too early, but already too late to get back to sleep. So he’d better get up, and simply go through his morning work-out. The routine, the regularity of the exercises were what grounded him. It felt good, to push hard on his arms, to get his heart to beat fast for a reason, to get his brain to empty and his back to burn. This morning especially, the effort was even more rewarding than usual. His sharp breath breaking the silence. Time to shower, he decided.

The shower. Oh! This was the best reward he could have. He had made the right choice, he thought, as warm water was running on his head, slowly reaching his scalp, and along his spine, down his thigh and between his ankles, giving him delicious chills. He was so much better here. Alone, calm. Busy, even. And most importantly, he was not permanently shut in one of those atrocious concrete cells. If there was a fire, he thought, the flames would rise to the sky.

Nezumi didn’t think very often of the past. But the previous day’s odd vision was still in his mind as his lower back burned once more beneath the scalding water. But was it too hot or was it only his mind playing tricks once more? Anyway, it was time to get clothed and go outside. This time he took a backpack and a few books as he made his way to the cafeteria. It was still very early – too early – and very few men were sat at the large tables. Nezumi considered taking a seat too, but the glares he received and the whispering quickly made him change his mind. Too early to deal with this shit. He took an apple, and walked to the bus area. But the drivers weren’t there yet. Checking his watch, Nezumi repressed a sigh. One hour left… He could have just sat next to the bus, but he didn’t like staying there. When he was reading, it was easy to sneak behind his back. Looking around him, Nezumi noticed the building Shion had come from the previous day. It was a bit further away, and gave a nice view on the cafeteria. He supposed he would also hear the driver when he arrived. Once he reached the entrance, he was glad to notice the stairs. Sitting there, he took his book, and started reading. .

“Nezumi?”

Startled at the soft call of his name, Nezumi almost dropped his book as he got up to face the source of the voice. “Shion…” Nezumi muttered, as his heartbeat slowed to a decent rate. He wanted to shout at the other man for alarming him. But of course, he couldn’t do that. Instead he searched for this watch, fumbling with his sleeves. “Am I late?”

“Don’t worry, you still have half an hour. I always come in advance.” Shion smiled as if nothing had happened. As if he hadn’t entered Nezumi’s safety zone without the other man noticing. A bright smile, and kind ruby eyes that pierced through Nezumi’s mind. “You’re reading?”

“Wow, your sharp mind struck once again, I see.” Nezumi’s tone was defiant, his gaze dark. Shion’s eyes widened a bit as he took a step back and cocked his head on this side.

“Wow. Good morning, too, Nezumi.” He looked offended.

Of course. He couldn’t understand his reaction. Nezumi gave a sigh, his shoulders dropping. “I am sorry, Your Majesty. Please forgive my rudeness.” He really needed to get his shit together, rules here were different. He got up, shoving his book back in his bag and looking up at Shion, who was staring back from the top of the stairs. His head was still cocked but his eyes had softened. With the rising sun reflecting on them, they wore an almost mystical look.

“Why do you call me that?” he asked.

“Call you what?” Nezumi replied lazily as he took the first steps toward the bus, which was now open for them to climb in.

“Your Majesty. It’s inappropriate!” Nezumi closed his eyes as Shion’s voice reached his ears. He was right behind him, having to trot to catch up with him. Suddenly he felt the smaller man’s hand closing on his arm. It took all his will power, and a sharp inhale to avoid turning too violently on his coordinator.

“Is it?” he breathed through clenched teeth. Shion’s stare at him was serious, and unwavering. His grip was strong but not painful. An easy twist of his wrist and the roles were reversed, Nezumi taking Shion’s arm to pull at him and whisper in his ear, ��It doesn’t seem inappropriate to me. I didn’t choose you but still you have complete power over me. You live in a wealth I’ve never achieved and certainly never will. You think you can change my life but you have no idea what world our folk lives in. You’re there, commanding people when you have no right to, when you’ve never had to prove anything whereas we always have to prove ourselves. You’re unreachable…”

To this, Shion took a step back, seeming unsure what to say. “You’re wrong…”

“Pardon me?” Nezumi snorted. “We’re not allowed to go in the same buildings as far as I know. I can’t even put my hand to your throat – ” he raised his free hand to place his fingers lightly over the white-haired man’s wind pipe, feeling his heavy gulp as he did so “ – without risking being taken away immediately by your guards.” The last words were merely a murmur, a string of air brushing at Shion’s cheeks.

Shion shook his head at the statement. His eyes locked on Nezumi’s glare as he pressed his hand against Nezumi’s, thus forcing his throat harder against the other man’s palm. “You can reach me,” he whispered. “We live in the same world Nezumi. Only we don’t have the same view of it….”

Nezumi huffed at the ridiculous sentence. He shook his hands away and resumed walking to the bus, but stopped when Shion spoke to his back.

“It’s like the forest, Nezumi… Like I showed you yesterday… Some are broken and ill, but with care and time… I am sure we can nurse them back to health and beauty.”

Looking over his shoulder, Nezumi answered flatly, “I am not so sure, Your Majesty. Some fires burn the forest to the roots, and the only things left are ashes that gather in your airways and choke you as you breath them in.” And with this, he left the coordinator to take a seat at the back of the bus. His back itched but he ignored the minor discomfort.

Once arrived in the forest, Shion brought the group to a new area where they started collecting samples again. The other inmates worked in pairs. They all had their roles. Some were there to collect the samples, others had to organize them. They took notes and talked light-heartedly. Nezumi observed them as Shion was occupied collecting soil, looking fascinated at the numerous insects he saw, noting everything frenetically on a small notepad. His curious eyes so focused, they looked almost brown.

At some point, an inmate started using a large liana to whip a colleague, shouting lewdly as he did so. Everyone laughed, rolling their eyes as Shion asked for them to calm down and get back to work, hiding a small smile. Nezumi would have imagined a coordinator would be harder on them than that. He didn’t understand how Shion managed to get his team together with such a lenient attitude, but still. Somehow it worked, as everyone was getting their work done.

At the lunch break, everyone took their sandwich and sat on the ground, chewing happily. Shion was once again chattering with everyone, asking for news. One of the guys’ wife had given birth the day before. She had been pregnant right when he was imprisoned for stealing money at his workplace.

“Hey boss, you think they’ll let me see my baby at the hospital? I made my appeal a few weeks ago but they said I’d have to wait to get the answer. The wife isn’t too happy, but well you know… hormones n’ everything, she ain’t an easy one!”

Another guy burst out laughing. “Admit you only wanna have your way!! Hormones, hey?”

Almost everyone laughed loudly as Shion answered to the guy softly, telling him he had asked the hierarchy, but as he only had a few weeks left here before being released, he would probably have to wait. The guy’s shoulders dropped in disappointment.

“And you, boss, you have a kid and a wife waiting for you at home?” another asked.

Nezumi didn’t miss few men snickering, looking right at him. “As if that fag would ever go for a woman.” Nezumi pointedly ignored them as Shion smiled. “No wife for me, guys… And as for kids….” He patted the ground, holding a flower delicately between his fingers, “I guess this forest is sort of my baby.” He smiled tenderly at the flower.

“And now…. Time to baby sit again everyone!” He winked at the group, getting up again as they were half-heartedly complaining. “Nezumi, come with me!”

Nezumi got up and gathered his stuff before following Shion. Silently he took the boxes his coordinator handed him. “I want to collect some flowers with their roots. We’ll grow them back at the facility.” Nezumi nodded, getting to work.

“Your Majesty?” he asked after a while.

Shion was kneeling beside him. His hand deeply buried in the soil, he stopped moving, waiting for the other man to continue.

“Do you have a family? At home, I mean…”

“Here is my family, Nezumi.” Shion smiled easily. “I live here, you know.”

“Yeah, one of the apartments above mine, I saw that. But… don’t you have parents, friends, outside of here?”

Shion took his time to answer. “I have my mom, but she lives in town and I can go see her fairly often. As for my friends. Well my colleagues are my friends. There is also Safu. She works as a psychiatrist here you know. We went to school together.”

Nezumi hummed. “You look like a workaholic to me.”

“Find a job you love and you’ll never have to work a day in your life, as the saying goes.” Shion’s voice was cheerful. “And you Nezumi, don’t you have a family, friends, waiting for you to join them outside?”

Nezumi froze, his silver eyes looking empty for a second, before he closed them. “Why would I burden myself with people? I’m great on my own you know.” Shion seemed to hesitate. Nezumi caught his eyelashes – white, he noticed – fluttering, and his Adam’s apple moving as he gulped. Eventually he spoke, his voice careful.

“I’m sorry Nezumi… I checked your record yesterday.” Nezumi didn’t answer, but he resumed working, gaze focused on his task. He should have known better.

“It says you were suspected of trying to…”

“You should know when to stop for your own good, your Majesty.” Nezumi’s voice was gentle but his eyes were hard. “Don’t try to understand me, the only ones who tried are now dead.”

Shion fell silent for a few seconds, looking at the other man. He was quite beautiful, this man. His muscles stood out below his T-shirt. Even stained with dirt, his hands were elegant; his long, raven hair attached in a ponytail apart from a few strands sticking to his neck. His neck, so delicate and strong at the same time. Pale skin that led to a strong jaw… and even stronger eyes. Mesmerizing eyes the color of a blade. Shion breathed deeply. This beautiful man, who had spent more years in prison than most of the convicts here. He reminded him of shattered mirrors, whose numerous facets were so hypnotizing, but showed a distorted reflection of reality. Shattered mirrors were both amazingly entrancing and extremely sharp. So sharp.

Suddenly his eyes got teary, he didn’t know why. Nezumi’s eyes widened at the sight of the first tear rolling along Shion’s cheek. But as Shion resumed working without a word, he did the same.

When it was time for them to get their dinner, the convicts all went to the cafeteria. Most of them were exhausted from their day of hard working, and so the ambiance was rather quiet, considering the amount of people gathered in the building. Nezumi got himself a plate and a place next to a group of silent guys who didn’t seem to be too much of a nuisance. He ate his supper tranquilly. His mind wandered to the day’s events. Shion was too curious for his own good. He had the feeling the man wanted to get to know him. To get inside his skin, inside his head and analyse him like he analysed the pieces of bark they collected. You’ll only find fire. And at this rate you’ll end as scorched and hurt as the others. The others. There was a time when he wasn’t so hostile to his fellows. But that time was over now, and the only contacts he still sought were those from whom he had something to gain. Speaking of which…

“HEY! The rat! I heard you were a whore back in prison!” The man calling out to him seemed rather smug, all his friends laughing heavily around him. Nezumi was used to it. He could have ignored the remark but right now it seemed a nice distraction enough. Turning in his direction, he took note of the broad shoulders and nice enough lips. The guy looked rather clean. A good point for him. It was a change from those scums he had to hang out with lately. Yeah, this guy would do, after all.

Nezumi winked at him, lips turning up oh so slightly.

“Are you interested?” He got up, taking a few steps toward the guy, who stopped laughing altogether as whistles could be heard around them. “I can give you a sample if you wish.” The words were breathed against the guy’s neck as Nezumi sat on the table next to him. The guy turned to him, an eyebrow quirked in defiance. “Bored already?”

Nezumi’s smile broadened. “You have no idea…” Over the guy’s shoulder he could see a few guards speaking to one another, one of them running to the coordinator’s room. The image of a single tear rolling down a pale cheek, above a reddish scar flashed in front him. His lips crashed against the other guy’s, and he ignored his surprised inhale as he kissed the man fully.

In all honesty it wasn’t a really good kiss. The guy was apparently self-conscious, and he lacked the boldness Nezumi craved. But still it was lips, and tongue, and around them he could hear the whistles and people cheering excitedly. It was enough to clear his mind and get his body to go numb. The guy cupped his jaw, letting a moan as Nezumi licked his lips and it was enough of an invitation to get closer and grind against him. The guy’s breathing was hard and Nezumi could feel him shaking as he took his hands lower on his body. But right when it was getting interesting he felt a strong grip on his shoulder and didn’t have time to register as he was brutally thrown away from the panting guy’s lap.

“NEZUMI!!! IN MY OFFICE! NOW!”

Shion’s furious glare paralyzed Nezumi for a second, and he was still so far gone. But his coordinator didn’t give him the time to think further as he took him by the neck and strongly pushed him onward. This woke Nezumi up, and he broke away from the white-haired man, noticing his own rasping breathing as he retorted, “Hey, give me a break will you?!”

“How. DARE. YOU?!” Shion was furious. Almost scary. His blood-coloured eyes were fixed at Nezumi in a threatening glare. Nezumi shook his shoulders looking at the door, then at the man. “Show me the way, sir. I’m new, here, if you remember.” He dropped in a tone that was, hopefully, nonchalant.

Shion took him once again by the T-shirt and dragged him, mumbling something that sounded a lot like, “The hell I know you’re new here….”

They arrived in Shion’s office and the door slammed hard behind them. Shion didn’t take the time to sit behind his desk, he leaned against the doorframe, arms crossed.

“Explain yourself.”

Nezumi looked at him dumbfounded. He felt dizzy, blood slowly coming back to his brain as he took in his surroundings. He was starting to note the number of potted plants in the place, when Shion punched the door, startling him.

“EXPLAIN YOURSELF!”

Well. That was unexpected. “What is there to explain, if I may ask?”

“Oh. I don’t know. Like why the hell were you almost getting off on that guy’s lap in the middle of the fucking cafeteria?”

“Well I didn’t know making out was forbidden, you told me nothing about it yesterday.”

“That. Is not. The. Question.” Shion was trembling, his face red and eyes still furious, but his breathing was getting steadier.

Nezumi decided this little game had lasted long enough. He was tired, and needed to be alone “The guy made advances on me, I wanted to kiss him, we kissed, end of the story. What’s the issue with that?”

Shion’s exasperated sigh was enough of an answer. “Nezumi the guy was almost coming on you!”

“Well it’s not my fault if I’m a good kisser. Wanna try it?”

Nezumi didn’t expect Shion’s slap but the guy was too slow and he was faster, catching Shion’s hand before it hit his face.

“WHAT’S THE PROBLEM WITH YOU?!” the white-haired man almost howled at him.

“I could ask you the same question,” Nezumi growled. “Do you often hit your men, Shion?”

Shion looked like someone had just punched him in the face. Suddenly he started shaking, blushing heavily. His arms went limp. Nezumi released him, judging he was no threat anymore. Still he kept a cautious eye on him as Shion sat on his chair, taking his head in his hand.

“Please, forgive me, I forgot myself.” Shion’s shaky voice was low. Under Nezumi’s scrutinizing gaze, he took a series of deep breaths before finally raising his eyes. “What got into to your head Nezumi?”

“And what got into yours? We were only kissing. Nothing to panic about to my knowledge.”

“Normal people don’t go nearly having sex in public right after their arrival in an inmate reintegration center….”

“I arrived three days ago!”

“Still, Nezumi. What were you thinking? Did you want to get something from him? No one is allowed to use money here you know.”

“I’ve had enough,” Nezumi barked, turning around, but as he tried to open the door, the knob somehow refused to obey. “The fuck?” he growled, looking at Shion. “You locked us in?!”

“I wanted to have a proper talk with you.”

“Great! Don’t you have better things to do Shion? Your days are longer than mine and still I’m exhausted. Let’s be done with it.” The last sentence was almost a plea. Shion sighed deeply.

“I can’t have you prostituting yourself again… It’s for your own good….”

“For fuck’s sake SHION, I. Was. Not. Prostituting. Myself. I just freaking kissed a guy, that’s all!!” Nezumi was now gesturing broadly, hands above his head. Clearly frustrated way beyond his usual tolerance level.

“Nezumi you need to understand. Don’t give them reason to throw you back there…”

“That’s none of your business to my knowledge!”

Shion’s eyes hardened “Actually. It is. As your coordinator I’m responsible for your actions. But you’re right, I’m exhausted. You exhaust me. I still have a meeting in 10 minutes I need to attend. So I’ll let you go for now, but I don’t want to hear more about you tonight.” Nezumi’s relieved sigh was audible to the both of them. And he hated himself for that.

Shion got up to unlock the door. Before they parted ways, he took a last look at his convict. “Nezumi. You have to know. They’ll request a psychiatric examination for you. I won’t be able to prevent it. So if you want to avoid being sent to I-don’t-know-what-medical-facility. Please. Behave”. Nezumi’s eyes widened. Shion made an attempt at reaching toward him before obviously thinking better of it and dropping his arm.

“Goodnight Nezumi.”

As the other man left, Shion rested his head against the cool doorframe.

#no.6 #nezushi #fic #fanfiction #no6 #WTTRW

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vaguely-concerned · 7 years ago

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Some Uncharted 3 feels

- My sister and I just finished up Uncharted 3: Drake’s Deception, and let me tell you… she chose the perfect fucking game to introduce me to the series because a) parental substitute stories are my ultimate narrative Jam and I will eat it up with not one spoon, not two spoons, but every spoon made available to me, b) the early parts of the game with Chloe and Charlie are g e n i u s and I loved all these treasure hunting weirdos (Charlie’s interspersed British History info dump while Nate was doing his own Francis Drake info dump was golden) and c) the moment I had to control tiny little bb Nate scrambling over the rooftops every protective instinct rose up in me and I adopted him as my son. He just feels so vulnerable in this one, even as an adult, I want to slap Marlowe’s filthy British gaslighting hands away from him and keep him safe. (‘Sullly hasn’t come back for you yet’ how D A R E you monster)

- I feel a deep eternal spiritual connection with Sully, because we both took one look at this disaster child and went ‘...well nothing for it I must now protect him for as long as I live’. (There were frequently hilarious moments when I was cottoning on to what kind of insane leap the game/Nathan ‘No Trace Of Impulse Control’ Drake wanted me to do next and I was like ‘oh no… no baby child you’ll break your neck I hate this’ and one second later Sully would be like ‘...you sure about this, kid’ and I was like ‘THANK YOU SULLY THIS IS MADNESS’ and then of course Nate would do it anyway while I turned my head so I wouldn’t have to look at the craziness I had wrought with the dual shock controller)

- It’s perfectly understandable why Nate marries Elena in the end and I am very happy for them, but with all objective truth in the universe we must all come to accept that no one in this game is more Marriage Material than Salim. Always there with a freakishly durable horse and a perfectly timed rescue to sweep you off your feet — literally, because you’re an idiot who routinely jumps from your horse onto trucks at breakneck speed and yet he lets you sit behind him on his horse until you find yours again; a Gentleman. Beautiful eyes. Excellent sense of dramatic timing, maybe good hair under the coverings, could immediately feel the cosmic vibrations of hurt puppy, I-am-doing-the-best-I-can-I-swear-everything-just-keeps-happening-to-me energy around Nathan Drake and chose to protect him… truly, the perfect man.

- I sort of got the thing they tried to do at the end with the Talbot/Marlowe bond mirrored with the Nate/Sully one, but I feel like it would have been better if it was built up more before they reach the city? Like at this point your distaste for Talbot is so strong that you’re like ‘well GOOD your mother figure sucked anyway, choke on quicksand assbutt’, and it could have been more gutting if he was just a tiny bit more likeable. Marlowe had some really good indirect characterization going on though, like the fact that after twenty years she STILL hasn’t figured out that the reason Sully suddenly ‘stabbed her in the back’ was that she fucking hit a kid in the face in front of him. (It wasn’t subtle, Katherine, he’s standing there like D: D: D: right behind you)

- GOD the damn shipyard stuff dragged on FOREVER and for no narrative reward whatsoever — if you think about it it could literally be removed from the game completely and… nothing at all would change except Nate would maybe have a few more ribs still intact — and also the gameplay was tiring, but it was tremendously effective in making you feel what Nate feels and so I forgive it. I felt fucking harrowed by the time he wakes up on that beach, enough so that I didn’t even bother to go ‘uh. Sure. sure he washed ashore safely from what looked very much like the open ocean. That’s… likely’. I was just happy he was okay. Ssssh it’s psychological storytelling okay let’s not question it. Also being on a sinking cruise ship was admittedly some of the coolest level design I’ve ever seen, so there’s that.

- On an unrelated note I wonder what the hell Marlowe was paying her goons for them to keep trying to murder me after their employer had set fire to the chateau with them still inside it with no way out and while a plane was getting torn to pieces around them. That’s dedication, I’m actually impressed.

- No one wears a henley shirt quite like Nathan Drake. Like my feelings for him are more parental than anything but damn that boy sure knows how to pull off a Look.

- Talking about parental feelings, who else melts every time he starts expounding on a special interest? He’s such a ditz about everything else and yet… is it English renaissance and/or connected to Francis Drake in even the vaguest possible way? My boy will talk your ear off about it. God bless this ADHD poster child.

- They really did some cool things with his characterization otherwise too — this game feels a little like a coming of age story, despite the fact that he’s like… thirty five, because there’s this childlike quality to him, that slight manic brittleness of an abandoned, hurt child that is both tremendously endearing and slightly unsettling. (He… kills a lot of people in this game, u guise, and while most of it is made out to be basically self defense he, uh, doesn’t seem all that broken up about it) Marlowe revealing his real backstory so off-handedly and leaving you to puzzle together the fact that he has made himself into his own escapist character worked so well and might have hit me even harder if I’d played the first two. From how strongly he reacts to Elena’s comments about it he must realize on some level that Sully is getting older and that would trigger that fear that he’s going to leave the Adventure and by extension him behind, taking the one stable thing he’s had in his life since he was like fifteen away. (Thank you, Sully, for staying alive like a champ even though you’re the resident mentor and Nate’s terrified imagination murdered you like… four times in this game, this is the kind of dedication and survivability I like to see in a father figure)

I love that in the end what lets him heal is feeling safe in the fact that these people love him and won’t leave him even though he’s pulling the most insane shit and that is all that hole in him he tried to fill with adrenaline and Adventure really needed and he can let go enough to have real emotional closeness. Aaaand also he needed to sink a fucking city into the sand in the process b/c of who he is as a person, I guess. Let me reiterate: god bless him.

- Most difficult parts: when they try to make you shoot hallucination!Sully (I’m such a wimp, I couldn’t lol) and when you have to fight Charlie. I failed that fight thrice because I didn’t want to hit him back. Also when they make you think Charlie’s about to die, that was straight up mean

- “*deep sigh* This is why we can’t have nice things” I am Sully and Sully is me. Really though, that man is the true hero of this story. He’s been saying ‘Careful Nate’ and ‘Nate find another way so you won’t fucking die’ and ‘HOLY SHIT KID’ for twenty years and it has never worked and yet he still tries. Inspiring.

- The voice acting was amazing — I have never understood the hype around Nolan North before, he’s just everywhere in games, it would be like noticing the presence of air, but then I heard the way his voice went tiny when he said ‘Sully?’ and everything inside me went !!!!!

I get it now

- My one real complaint: I hope whoever’s responsible for all the ‘running towards the floaty camera’ scenes steps on one Lego annually for the next decade, those parts took years off my life

- Marlowe is a class act on the good old Villain Stuff — I burst out laughing when it turned out she was a member of an ~*ancient secret society*~ because… of course. Of COURSE she is — and I deeply respect that. Quoting T. S. Eliot at you while you’re dying in the desert? They just don’t make ‘em like that anymore, guys.

- This game is the ultimate proof that if you successfully create emotional connection with the characters, your plot can be as openly silly and full of holes as you like and people will roll with it. I mean that ending made no sense whatsoever but I was too busy whimpering through Nate’s hallucination panic attack thingy to care and that is… no one should have that kind of power, Naughty Dog, why u hurt me this way and make me forget what logic is

- Most brilliantly funny and understated moment: baby Nate casually reaching out for Sully’s beer and Sully being like ‘lol no kid’ in the most knowing, already fond way. The physical acting in these games is just phenomenal, which I guess is the upside of all the mocap stuff? (also makes sure they’re quite short and streamlined tho ha ha)

- We got ‘The Lost Legacy’ with the PS4 too so I’m going to start that — I think I will miss Nate but I also love Chloe and her cynical yet caring ass with the passion of a thousand suns so it’ll be okay ha ha

#uncharted 3 drake's deception #uncharted #thinky thoughts #meta #‘Made himself into his own escapist character’ *spots mccree out of the corner of my eye; sweats nervously* I may… have a Type in sons #uncharted 3

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idealisticrealism · 7 years ago

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Blindspot 3x01 recap

Okay so honestly, until the episode actually aired I wasn’t sure this recap would happen. This hiatus has been all too easy for me, because the finale-- or, specifically, the time jump paired with the realisation that Weller really was going to have a kid-- really made me question whether this was still the show I fell in love with, and if I really wanted to dedicate any more of my time to it. Plus, since I avoid spoilers, there were some serious concerns-- for example, whether Weller even knew why Jane left-- that I had, that I didn’t have the answers to yet.

Which meant that basically I went into this episode not really expecting to feel particularly positive about it. But instead-- like with the second half of S2 after that rather unpleasant start-- damn Gero managed to pull me back in, as he somehow always does.

So here goes. Recap time. But fair warning: this review is about my personal feelings towards the show, and therefore you may not agree with what you read. Feel free to come and talk to me about it anyway.

Honestly I (like everyone else) knew a wedding was coming, but unlike everyone else I wasn’t all that interested to see it. I mean, I’m happy for them and all, but I’m more interested in seeing the being-married part than the actual getting married. But then the flowers, and the music, and the family looking so beautiful, and Patterson OFFICIATING, and Hirst and Stuart being there (side note: I am only now recognising Stuart as an actor from Gero’s old show the LA Complex, along with about six other actors who have been on this show over the years lol). But anyway, considering my biggest problem with S2 was the baby fiasco, I was expecting to feel the same nausea when seeing the baby onscreen as when I thought of it at any other time (it’s literally one of my least fave tropes, guys, so I’m sorry but I will always hate the existence of the baby), but it was fairly easy to just ignore it. I was bummed not to see Sarah or Sawyer, who would literally have never missed this wedding and tbh would have been a waaaaaaaay better inclusion in S2 and 3 than the unwanted offspring, but whatever. #Foreverbitter

That said, seeing the team laughing and dancing and having an amazing time was just the best. And of course the Jeller lovey-doveyness was so great, and maaaann I really wish we could have heard those speeches. Reade and Tasha dancing was a little bit borderline for me-- they’re so cute and I love them as best friends but PLEASE GERO JUST LET THEM BE BEST FRIENDS. DON’T PUT THEM TOGETHER. PLEASE DON’T.

Ngl I don't at all like that Jeller moved to Colorado. Big nope for me, though I understand why it happened, and god I did love the scene with the fam helping them pack and then tough-as-nails Tasha crying??? Let me die. But I also identify with her the most rn, bc she GETS it. With Jeller gone, their family will never be the same. The roadtrip montage was cute, and the carrying over the threshold???? Ughhhhh save me. I love that they took on the project of the house, the two of them making the perfect team (was there a baby in this montage? Nope, not that I saw. No babies here. Maybe just Allie’s new puppy that they look after from time to time. Yeah, let’s go with that. Bethany is a puppy they babysit and no one can force me to view it as anything else).

So as much as I’m enjoying this montage of domestic bliss, I’m kinda ready for it to end because GUYS PLEASE I’M TOO USED TO ANGST AND SLOW BURN, YOU CAN’T OVERLOAD ME WITH FLUFF LIKE THIS. And then phew it ends, leaving us in the new Jeller residence with Weller just returning from napping in the laundry beside Bethany’s basket because she still howls when she’s left alone and so he had to pet her until she fell asleep. Awwwww, so nice of these two to look after Allie’s puppy while she works nightshift. I love that Jane cooked dinner-- I bet Weller’s been teaching her and lots of sweet and sexy kitchen times have ensued. Jane gushes about the puppy’s cuteness and Weller suggests maybe they should get one of their own. Good thing they’re talking about a puppy and not a child because wow “one of our own” sure had a very exclusionary implication, like Jane was not at all connected to any other puppies/babies that might exist. But anyway I gotta move on before the world I’ve carefully constructed in this Matrix starts glitching. Saved by the bell, or rather the phone-- it’s Keaton with a warning that their lives are in danger, and here’s yet another topic that threatens to glitch my reality. Keaton tortured Jane for THREE MONTHS. Brutally and without true remorse. He should be persona non grata with literally everyone (the team and the fans alike), but instead the writers have turned him into the team’s new buddy. This is the biggest issue I’ve had with the show, I think-- not Keaton specifically, but what he represents. Because honestly when I think about certain plot points in theory, I feel very strongly and very negatively about them; but when the show goes “no it’s fine everything’s actually great” it somehow sucks me in and I just go ‘oh okay cool everything is great, that’s good then’’, and I just?? For example, I really enjoyed watching Keaton in the finale, and then I thought about it after the episode ad was like ‘wait no I hate him, how did I forget I hate him?’ Like I stg Gero is a wizard, and like anything truly magic related, that’s both a good and a bad thing. But anyway rn I’m appreciative of Keaton because he just helped save Jane and Weller’s lives. So I guess he gets points for that, though technically Jane has saved his life a couple of times already now. Jeller proceed to beat the crap out of their attackers, and aaahhhh, isn’t this so much more THEM than painting walls and picking out cushions? Their Colorado life was a nice little holiday but it wasn’t them. Naturally the gunshots wake little puppy Bethany who is now barking in distress, but they check on her and she’s fine. Keaton rocks up to explain that some Sandstorm member has put out a hit on Jane for $10M, and now no one can stop a shit-ton of mercenaries from coming after Jane. Keaton and Jane are in agreement about putting Jane into a version of WitSec-- hopefully with much more comfortable lodgings than the last time she was put up by the CIA. (#Yesstillbitter). Weller tries to reject the idea, then decides he’s coming too, bc “You’re my wife” ughhhhhh, but Jane can’t let him walk away from the rest of his life. She knows what that’s like, after all, though lbr giving up her life as Remi was the best thing she ever did. Unfortunately for Weller, he has a very hardheaded wife and he sleeps very heavily when he’s cuddling a fluffy puppy, so Jane bails in the middle of the night, and nope nope nope I never needed to see her crying as she pulled off her wedding ring, thanks Satan (I mean Gero). But lbr, Weller is Jane’s everything, and she would do anything-- including break her own heart-- to keep him safe. Oh, Jane, you noble idiot. At least this whole scene has allayed one of my concerns going into this season-- Weller definitely knows why Jane had to go, so he knows it was done out of love, and not for the lack of it. I still think she could have kept the ring, but I suppose by leaving it she was telling him that she was okay, that she was leaving of her own accord and hadn’t been kidnapped or murdered or anything.

Have I mentioned lately how much I really hate time-jumps??? After the finale, I desperately hoped that they had been married the majority of that two year gap and that their separation was only like three or so months. I even mostly-completed a oneshot postfinale fic along those lines, but then we found out about the 18 month thing and I was like “well screw you too, show” (#yepdefinitelybitter) and abandoned the story entirely. Plus, it’s been otherwise proved non-canon now, so that was rather a waste of time. But anyway, it’s now 18 months after Jane disappeared (undoubtedly aided by Keaton) and you just know the whole family will have been scattered to the winds. Another reason to hate time jumps. Speaking of the team, Hirst shows up at Weller’s apartment-- which he somehow still has; renting it out, I guess?? But damn he’s clearly richer than I thought he was. He’s about to sell it though bc he’s spending all his time and money searching for Jane, just as he has for the last 18 months. And on one hand, I can totally be like “awww he loves her so much” but on the other hand I want to be like “wtf you sadistic writers, you’re literally going to rip apart a couple who loves each other for A YEAR AND A HALF, which is a FREAKING LONG TIME (seriously where were you 1.5yrs ago? Think about that and how much of forever ago it was) and then also literally have the love of Weller’s life disappear into thin air, when he had already spent 25 years of his life searching for the last person he loved who disappeared, and OH YEAH, WHO TURNED OUT TO HAVE BEEN DEAD THE WHOLE TIME???” Legit, if you actually take two seconds to think about it, this entire plotline is freaking awful and upsetting and yet the show will literally brush it off like it’s nothing, or merely a tiny insignificant blip in their lives. Just watch. And so again, this is one of those moments where Gero bedazzles us into not being upset by things which very much should upset us. But ANYWAY, Hirst is there because the team has been kidnapped, and I use the word ‘team’ lightly here, because they literally haven't seen each other in like a year because everything fell apart after Jeller abandoned them to go puppysit in Colorado. Anyhow, a mysterious box with Jane’s name on it (or her maiden name at least, no one can convince me that the woman for whom Weller is her home wouldn’t have taken his name and the belonging that went with it) was left in Reade’s apartment, likely because he’s the only one left in NYC because all the others bailed. Seriously I feel like this team’s breaking apart has given ME abandonment issues, so I have no idea how they’re all managing. But anyway the other nifty thing about the box is that it has coordinates on it, very possibly leading to Jane’s location. Congrats, Weller, looks like you don’t have to sell your apartment after all. And you totally have all the info you need to go find Jane, plus an excellent excuse, given that only she can open the box and help them save their friends (who they completely ditched two years ago). Fun times.

Jump to Nepal, and the scene from the finale. Now we know for sure that the hug was because Jane had never wanted to leave him, which is nice. Also that whoever left the box (lbr we all already know it’s Roman) literally made it so the two of them HAD to solve this together. Looks like someone ships his his sister and brother in law lol… Aaaand okay now Jane is glowing. She admits that it must have happened when she was in an accident some months ago that had her in and out of consciousness for days, and wow how must that feel for Weller? Hearing that she literally almost died months ago and he would never have known about it? Dammit Jane, I know you suffered without him too and that you were doing it for ‘good’ reasons, but I still think you were wrong to do it. If anyone has a time machine up their sleeve, please donate it to these guys so they can go back and make better choices.

But all realistic feelings aside, the pair are straight back into tattoo solving mode (admit it guys, you’ve missed this) and quickly figure out that the first clue is a reference to the place that Weller proposed to Jane-- St Mark’s Square in Venice. Which on one hand is ugh so sweet and romantic but on the other is… kinda unoriginal? Lol. But regardless I need to hear more about his proposal. How long were they in Venice? How long had they been together? Did he intend to propose the whole time or did it just happen? Why did they holiday in Venice as opposed to other locations? Tell me EVERYTHING, GERO. But anyway Jane’s like ‘It’s happening all over again’ and it’s easy to assume she’s unhappy about that, but then again, maybe she’s actually not? Technically working with the team on the tattoos was the best time of her life (with some exceptions here and there). Weller offers for her to stay out of it if she wants to-- which is big of you, Weller, it really is. I mean we all know you're desperately hoping she comes with you, but then again you want her to be safe, so… this must be conflicting lol. But of course Jane is down to rescue their best friends (again, friends that they abandoned #irrationallybitter), and lbr is probably super sick of climbing that damn cliff, PLUS can’t face leaving her hubby a second time, so together they set off to Venice. Yay!

Weller has taken some full-body shots of the new tatts (I feel like that had to be slightly awkward for both of them) and sends them through to the lab, where they are received by Stuart (onya for moving up in the world, buddy), Hirst, and… RICH DOT FREAKIN COM. I mean, we’ve all known for a while that he was returning, and suspected long before that, but honestly this is the moment that makes the episode for me. My fave is back and is making jokes about nudes, and all is right with the world. Jane is like ‘wtf’, and so Weller gives her a rundown on all she missed-- namely, that her entire ‘family’ has become estranged-- Reade is working in a position that tbh feels above his ability and experience level, give that his predecessors are the superhuman Mayfair and the wonderboy Weller; Tasha the CIA-hater is now working for the man who tortured Jane; Patterson has literally moved as far across the country as she can, to do work as far from their FBI work as possible. See what happens when parents abandon their children, Jane?? Everything falls apart, so you better go fix it. Also, two things: first, I wanna know all about Rich’s dealings with the FBI in the last two years. Give me a spin off just about that, please. Secondly, did Rich and Patterson try to find Jane after she disappeared and how did they feel about their (apparent) lack of success? But anyway ugh literally every line of Rich’s is pure gold. I love that he’s staying in the same safe-house she did?? Keeping it in the family lol. And then ugh for all his jokes about the nudes etc, you can tell he’s legitimately concerned that they’re about to walk into a trap. Oh my baby loves and misses his friends and wants them back in one piece and I juST LOVE HIM SO MUCH

Meanwhile, in the fun bunker, Reade and Zapata wake up after being drugged, and while he’s all business, she’s like “it’s good to see you, even if it takes being kidnapped for it to happen” and we discover that they haven't spoken at all in the year since Zapata went to the CIA. Dammit Jeller, see what you did??? Everything is broken!!! And now a long-haired Patterson is herded into their cell, and is understandably all ‘wtf’ about it. Well, at least they’re all in the same room again, right?

Seeing Jeller in Venice is weird. I walked right there in the spot where they're walking, many times. I saw everything they’re seeing now. And ugh Jane says it seems like forever ago that they were last here, whereas for Weller it feels like it just happened. Which subtly demonstrates how they’re no longer in sync, and then ugh Weller tells her that this was the first place he came to after she disappeared, going straight to the place that only they knew about, hoping that she was waiting for him. But she wasn’t, and ugh you can tell how much that hurt him, realising that she was never going to come. How long did he wait for her before he realised that?? Ugh. But I appreciate that she immediately stops to apologise and try to explain herself, including making it clear that her love for him was the driving factor behind everything she did. The choice of language by the writers is clever, though, because we (and Weller) hear her say ‘loved’ and neither of us know for sure if that love is still present tense or not. Which of course it is, but still, the suspense… But ugh poor Weller. He’s still so hurt. Jane can you just give him another hug please? For longer this time? Like, say, forever?

Also sidebar: I’m holidaying in Vanuatu atm, and there’s an old guy swimming in the pool that I’m sitting beside, and he looked up at me as I was writing that last sentence and at first I thought maybe it’s because he’s a man and I’m female in a bikini, but then he goes (in a cute, accented voice) “Don’t work so hard. You’re on holiday! You should be relaxing!” hahaha. Don’t worry, buddy, I’ve been lazing by this pool for hours now, and I’m currently writing about some of my favourite fake humans. I’m all good.

Meanwhile back in the Blindspot world, Jeller find a case on the roof that has her tattoo on the side, and while Weller is all ‘wait for the bombsquad!!’ Jane ignores him and immediately opens it. Ah, Weller, did you miss this? I mean it’s just like old times. Inside the case there’s a phone, and Jane calls the number, and Roman answers almost too eagerly. He’s clearly pleased to be interacting with them both, and proud of himself for his genius plan for ‘tormenting’ them (while also bringing them back together, freeing Jane from the hit on her, and giving him an excuse to interact with them whenever he wants). Aw, my psychopathic lil boy just misses his family. Honestly it sounds like he’s gone through a fair bit of trouble to get to the guy who holds the hit out on Jane and give them a way to take him down… a way that involves kinda almost killing Jane but eh, could be worse? And then ooooh they realise from the bells that he’s right there in the square too, and omg as Jane is asking him how they get their friends back (answer: apparently they don’t) she’s spinning around looking for him, and right behind her is a walkway with a snack bar on one side of it, and man I have such clear memories of walking along that walkway to our hotel or stopping into that snack bar for gelati. Ugh, I miss Venice. And then he says her name again (dude it’s Jane WELLER, not Doe) and she spots him and takes off after him and Weller suddenly panics because he doesn’t know where she is (ugh my poor boy) but luckily he manages to take the exact right turn to find them (do you know how easy it is to get turned around in Venice????? He’d have never found them) and he jumps onto Roman’s getaway boat which is badass, and after what seems like several minutes of an unpleasant upper-body workout he manages to pull himself up on the boat and attack Roman. Meanwhile Jane, who got left behind earlier, has managed to just about catch up to them despite having commandeered what appears to be the Italian version of a motor-pontoon. Also Roman manages to keep his sunnies on throughout their fight which is pretty damn impressive considering that Weller has bodyslammed him a couple of times as well as punching him full on in the face more than once. But eh. Weller does manage to dislodge Roman's jacket as he gets literally kicked off the boat, though. Good thing Captain Jane and her trusty vessel aren't far behind, and pick him up. I like that she called him Weller; that’s right Jane, just because it’s your name now too doesn’t mean you can’t still call him that. Oooooh but rather than being grateful for the rescue, Weller is too busy being upset with Jane for ditching him, which he’s understandably just a tad sensitive about these days. Looks like these guys have still got a little bit to go in terms of getting their groove back. And while Jane is lamenting Roman’s escape, Weller shows her the phone from the pocket of Roman’s jacket, his voice all proud. Yeah, son, you did good.

Back at the lab, Stuart is still being antagonized by Rich, who I have to say pulls off those flowered shirts better than I would have believed possible. Though lbr, I gave up on trying not to be inexplicably attracted to Rich a long time ago. While they’re cracking the encrypted phone, Jeller go ahead with Roman’s plan to get rid of Jane’s bounty. Not that the munchkin is happy about it, of course, but Jane is determined to have her life back-- lbr, after getting to see Weller again after all this time, there’d be no way she could ever let him go again. While Weller’s super against the death-mimicking drug, it gets support from Stuart and Rich, the former in simply confirming that it does what Roman says it does, and the latter detailing his own uses for it which include faked-death border crossings and, of course, ‘some sex stuff’. Not sure I wanna hear the sex stories, but the border crossings one sure has me intrigued. The guys do bring up one catch: if she doesn’t have the antidote within 90 mins, she’ll actually die. Weller is NOT down with that, but before he can even get past the opening statement of his list of all the reasons why this is a Bad Idea, Jane stabs herself in the leg with the needle. His face is the most hilarious thing, like ‘Aaaaand she did the thing. Of course she did the thing. Why do I even ever try to talk her out of the thing, she always just does it anyway.’ lol. But let’s not forget there, he could literally grab the antidote right out of that case and stab her with it right now, completely counteracting the drug’s effects and preventing the plan from being able to go ahead. But she begged him to do it for her-- for them-- and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for her. Especially if it gives him the love of his life back. And come on, it’s not a true Jeller moment until one of them does something the other tells them not to, nearly dies, and is saved by the other, so…

In the fun bunker, the (now loosely defined) team is trying to figure out where they are (no clue), and why they were taken, and Reade immediately assumes it’s something to do with Zapata’s work at the CIA, and the two of them are immediately at each other’s throats about it before Patterson plays mediator, trying to get everyone to focus. On one hand I agree with Reade, bc the CIA is pretty shady and I don’t trust them, but Zapata’s probably right when she says that it must be about their time in the FBI since all three of them are here. However some Spanish-accented military dudes appear a moment later and tell them to break into a fancy safe or die, and hmmmm that is not quite what I expected. While Patterson assesses the crackability of the safe (fairly easy apparently, and dude how could I ever forget how much I love Patterson) Reade gets his wet-blanket on, and starts preaching about how they shouldn’t open it bc it’s a government safe and might have dangerous secrets inside etc, whereas Zapata is all “pshh, that’s a problem for another day. Today’s problem is not dying” which I fully support. And then they’re at it again (and not ‘at it’ in the sexy way, which in this moment would be uncomfortable for all kinds of reasons) but in the squabbly bickery way, but Patterson interrupts with some much needed truth bombs: Reade is mad at Zapata for leaving, Zapata’s mad at him for freezing her out after she left, and the team fell apart after Jeller left and they’re all still trying to deal with that loss. And ughhh everyone missed each other and they’re all unhappy in their separate lives and clearly the solution here is for everyone to come back to the team and stay together forever and never let Gero break them up ever again ugh. But anyhow, like all Patterson rants, this one results in everyone being like ‘sorry mom what do we need to do’ and ugh I’ve missed themmmmmm

Back in Venice, Weller is rolling a duffel bag with his estranged wife’s death-adjacent body inside. Act natural, Weller, because this would be a really awkward time to get stopped by the cops. Also sidenote, he’s rolling that bag like it doesn’t weigh much at all, which I'm going to pretend is just because he’s jacked and not because there’s actually nothing in the bag that they filmed with lol. Anyhow, the bag is now up on the altar in a church filled with bad guys, and time is running out before Jane needs the antidote. Of course the bounty guy is late. Thanks for my blood pressure issues, Blindspot. Also another sidenote, but the guy who greets him is totally a silver fox. Too bad he’s soon to be either arrested or dead. Finally his boss arrives-- he got caught up watching a glassblower, which tbh I completely understand, bc that kind of thing is awesome-- and then lolllll he listens with a stethoscope for like 2 seconds and then does a blood pressure and then declares Jane dead?? Um, no. As someone who has certified the deaths of many people in the last three years, and also interacted with a lot of death-adjacent people, let me tell you that a) a blood pressure is useless, b) he would need to listen for at LEAST two minutes with the steth, and c) there are several other simple checks he should have done that totally would have given Jane away. But whatevs, his lack of any medical understanding totally works in our favour. Weller is all “cool I love that she’s dead and that I’m getting all the moneys for it, hey can I have a sec with the body please?” but nope, the dude has his cronies ready to take her to the in-house crematorium (wow, talk about a one-stop shop) and Weller’s al ‘coolcoolcool’ *punches the dudes out and stabs Jane’s body right through the bag before being pulled away and having his ass handed to him*. And okay Jane would not have woken up instantly like that but DAMN if it doesn't look cool with her slowly emerging from the bag like an avenging angel (cool parallel with the pilot, of course) and then she’s all ‘how dare u hurt my man’, leading to a shot like in those cartoons where two characters are brawling inside a closed room or building and all you see is like the door bending outwards and clouds of dust puffing up and windows rattling etc, and then BAM BABY, JELLER IS BACK AND KICKING BUTT and also looking like they’re both a little turned on by it which is kind of awkward but at the same time I fully support it and Idk there’s just a lot of emotions going on rn

Rich excitedly confirms that Roman’s plan actually worked and Jane is now free, and ugh I like to think that it’s not just because he can’t believe it worked but more that he’s just really happy for them bc he ships them so much and it also means that they’re going to be coming home and basically I just want the whole gang back together ugh. That might be a little difficult though, as Rich informs them of the not-so-good good news-- Roman sold the other three into slavery, but thankfully he’s freaking awesome (and knows it) because he’s managed to figure out where they were taken. Lol at Weller's “Ugh he’s worse than Patterson” hahahaha. Ugh I just LOVE THESE GUYS. And so the others are apparently being held by the Venezuelan government, and Rich tells Jeller where, but they can’t have any official help (Oh Stuart: “shouldn't we just call the president or something?” my sweet summer child) and so Keaton is there to hook them up with some of his contacts and goddammit why is hating him so damn hard. And awww I love that lil baby Stuart is getting to play with the big kids these days, and awww Hirst is determined to get their ‘friends’ back (not their ‘agents’ or their ‘team’) and ugh this FAMILYYYY. It’s becoming increasingly apparent that the original family of five has now been joined by the cool wine aunt, the awkward and often annoying but also kinda useful uncle, the wacky flamboyant cousin, and the shy young nerd cousin now added into the mix.

In the fun bunker, Patterson is casually cracking the safe while snacking on her MRE, while Reade whines about his own food and Zapata messes with him for entertainment. Ah, good times. Then Patterson opens the safe-- literally the others seem to be barely there for anything other than moral support-- and they realise that the safe contains a government computer, probably with a bunch of dangerous secrets on it. Uh-oh. Before they can argue more about the merits of dying for the cause, though, the baddies arrive. They want Patterson to decrypt the computer which is gonna take a hella long time. Awww ‘we paid for the best computer specialist in the FBI’, and ughhh she really is. And then it turns out that Reade and Zapata are literally just there as incentive for her to get crackin’ or they’ll be killed. Eeeep. But our Patty Pat is a genius, and the baddies made the epic mistake of providing sustenance in the form of MREs. Basically if they use the hot packets from the food to turn the computer into a flashbang, they can distract the baddies long enough to overpower them and escape. Ugh I’m so proud of my lil baby genius. And she makes Reade apologise to the food for badmouthing it hahaha. Man I have missed this lil team so much!!

Up in the sky, Jeller are rushing to save their buddies, but also having The Talk-- aka the ‘what are we now?’ talk, bc lbr Jane so desperately wants their life together back, both as a married couple and as kickass FBI agents, but she doesn’t know if she has the right to have it back or if it's even what he wants, and then he’s all ‘yep let’s be married again we can just sweep this past 18 months under the rug please I’m good with that let’s just do that’ and ugh Jane admits that leaving him and their life was the hardest thing she’d ever done, but-- and man does he feel the ‘but’-- she really found herself after she left him. Oh man, what a kick in the guts. I totally get what she’s saying-- it’s not that she doesn’t want to be with him, or that she can only truly be herself without him, it’s that the puppy-sitting life in backwater Colorado is just not for her (Well, duh). She did it once to make him happy, but she can’t go back to it again or she’ll go stir-crazy. Well, good thing these new tattoos have given them both the perfect excuse to go back to their lives of kicking ass in NYC! Poor Weller though, he doesn’t understand yet, and the way his voice gets a little choked up just kills me. Oh Weller, just because she discovered who she is as a person without you (bearing in mind that pretty much her entire life that she can remember, you’ve been there), doesn’t mean she doesn’t love you with all her heart!

Now Jeller are at the compound, about to search every building individually when the others save them a bunch of time by causing a hell of a ruckus (exploding computers, gunfire, all-round hell breaking loose-- you know, the usual) and so Jeller have to adjust their plans. In a big, kick-ass way. I love the three making their big escape and then seeing the tank a roll up and aim towards them and they’re all ‘shit alright you got us geez we surrender’ and then BAM, the tank destroys the bad guys’ vehicles and probably everyone’s eardrums as well. I just love the wtf moment that these three must have when Weller suddenly pops up out of the tank-- dad’s here guys! Time to go! And then they’re inside and mom is driving and they all probably think that they’re hallucinating from something in the Mexican Style chicken stew and ughhhh they must be so relieved and Jane literally drives over a car bc ain't nothing getting in the way of getting her family to safety. Also lol Patterson must have been raking it in with the app designing because she’s all ‘I gotta buy me one of these’ haha. I’d love to see her cruising around NYC in one hahaha. And then ugh Jeller are all in sync again , taking out the baddies following them and the team is half-confused, half-happy and they have so many questions and then Reade’s “We got time, this tank is slow as hell’ lolllll. Well he’s not wrong…. wonder how long it took for things to get awkward??

Aaaand the team is safely back at the NYO, and Jane is in the scanner again, and Keaton is there again for whatever reason-- oh, because he wants the CIA to take the tattoo cases, while Hirst is all ‘bish please” in her excellent southern accent. So lemme guess, this is about to be a joint task force… and yep, Reade is all ‘this is the most sensible option’ like he totally doesn’t just want Zapata back. Haha yeah Keaton, you get me on this. It’s nice to see Reade stepping up and going head to head with the big kids, though I still don’t think he’s ready to be in this position (Are we forgetting the whole Jones thing and the drug binge??). But whatevs. Reade goes to tell the team about the joint task force and they’re like yeah duh, we’re all already in’. Well, except Patterson, who is playing a little hard to get. Maybe she’s still struggling to deal with all the Sandstorm trauma? And then omg “Rich is gonna brief us in Stuart’s lab” was the perfect sentence to say right then to convince her to stay haha. Well played, Reade. Patterson is not happy at all about Rich being involved, though Reade defends him which feels kinda weird but I also like it. I wanna hear more about their interactions. Again, spin-off, anyone?? Weller is all ‘oh god please where is the briefing just give us the briefing’ so after a lil more Patterson/Rich bickering (ah how I’ve missed that), Stuart tells them what they already know-- lots of tattoos to crack, so they better get…. Cracking (*insert finger guns here*). Patterson is now all in, refusing to leave this to Rich and Stuart (“No offense Stuart” hahahaha), and Jane is in too, despite Hirst offering for her to be free if she wants. Aww, Hirst. You are a sweetie pie. And then Rich: “Backstreets back alright! Six best friends and Stuart!” And UGH YES. Give me all the Rich, and all the Patterson and the Stuart and the ughhhh all of it. I do love that all joking aside, Rich does very genuinely tell Jane it's nice to see her again. He loves his Jane and he would do anything for her ugh

Oooh Jeller in their old apartment, and he’s all unsure whether she really wants to be there with him and she makes it clear that there’s nowhere else she wants to be, and yaaaas my boy acknowledges that the move to Colorado really didn’t fit her and that she’d given up a lot of her own happiness and personal meaning just to make him happy. So now they just need to strike a balance, which is all she wants-- to be there with him and be happy and in luuuurve while also kicking butt and saving people. And then ugh he pulls her ring out of his pocket and he’s been carrying it EVERY DAY since she left and he rushes to tell her that she doesn’t have to put it back on until she’s ready and ugh she takes it and kisses him and then lord save me from how husky her voice goes when she tells him she’s missed him so much and ughhhhh he’s missed her too and ugh my babies are about to have reunion sex on multiple surfaces in the house and I’m so happy for them. Damn Gero yet again you have managed to make the thought of 18 awful months completely disappear in the face of this excellence, and it’s all too easy to just let you make me forget, and ugh I want to stay upset about it but I just can’t. Damn it you crafty wizard, how have you gotten me so under your spell….

Lol Aunty Hirst checking in with Reade, seeing if he’s okay with all his fam coming back, but also warning him (and us) that none of these people are the same as they were two years ago. And to prove that point, uncle Keaton and Zapata are having their own, much shadier little conference about one of the tattoos, one that clearly points to something related to either them or the CIA in general, but it’s something they’re both very familiar with and won’t let the others find out about. Oooh, secrets. Speaking of secrets, Rich and Patterson have apparently been interacting regularly over the last two years??? And before anyone goes there, NO, I I don’t think their relationship is at all romantic or sexual. I think they’ve been business partners of a sort (probably with Boston as well, since he and Patterson kinda became buds) and I also think that Patterson has been secretly helping Rich help the FBI with their cases. But again, I want to hear ALL about whatever they’ve been up to bc ugh I love these two and their dynamic though I also kinda wanna give Rich a hug and tell Patterson to be nicer to her weirdo cousin haha. Oh wait, you thought we were done with the secrets???? Nope, Jane is looking unhappy and hiding a bunch of passports (probably given to her by Keaton) away the moment Weller leaves, and he steps outside their (apparently-renovated) building and immediately encounters Roman, who basically blackmails him to help him with tattoo-related stuff or he’ll tell Jane about ‘what happened in Berlin’. Weller is agrees to help immediately, which kinda makes it seem like whatever happened in Berlin was really, really bad. And again NO IT WAS NOT SOMETHING ROMANTIC OR SEXUAL. Geez, people. Neither Jane nor Weller would have slept with anyone else during their separation. To think so would be to have no understanding of either of the characters, or their character growth. Far more likely Weller did something that would be considered illegal or amoral, like killing someone, or something. Personally I think he and Roman encountered each other in Berlin and had an altercation wherein Weller injured and very nearly killed Roman, and Roman only survived by pure luck? That feels like a thing he’d want to keep from Jane, that he nearly killed her only family? Plus then he would kind of ‘owe’ Roman as well,. But idk, maybe it was something even shadier. Guess we’ll find out….

And so okay, I admit it. You've won, Gero. You’ve done a ton of things that have upset me or that I object to on multiple levels, but try as I might I can’t escape from your web. Looks like I’m stuck with this show, which means you guys are stuck with me and my recaps...

#Blindspot #Blindspot recap #Jeller #goddammit show how do you pull me in like this

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indomitablemegnolia · 7 years ago

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I looked at the riot of the crowd; yes, I know very few people would consider twelve people around a modest sized beach bonfire a rioting crowd, but I was never like most other people. God, it felt wonderful seeing so many I love happy, laughing. Yes, some; well, many, had fallen away over the long journey through hell to sunshine, but finally, we can see it, we can feel it; home. All that was ever needed was for one thing, one tiny thing to fall into place and the rest, mere details fell like dominoes. I kept pinching myself making sure this wasn’t pure fantasy; every pinch I prayed that if it was fantasy, that this pinch wouldn’t have the audacity to wake me up back in that land of gray and black. Those charcoal hues; god, I still wash daily from my skin, never coming clean. Hope had always waited just at the threshold of the day to come, whispering this one might be happier. So often it was just a dream of possibility; that possibility of happier, that kept us going; especially in those times we were starved; we literally would assess daily looking at eachother wondering which we would eat first. Today, so different from those days not so long ago; there was a lightness to the air. I can smell the salty surf, still taste the buttery lemon sweetness of the fresh caught crab. I could feel the warmth of the bonfire against my side. The air was crisp, smelled clean, deliciously invigorating. The sky, that sky, deep indigo, the darkest blue before true black, sprinkled with twinkling lights, mmm the stars yes, but also strings and strings of lights hung beautifully overhead making an amazing contrast. I have always written; some write in an effort to find themselves, pulling themselves through some façade with a spit finish shine. I always have known who I am, exactly where I was and why I had taken up residences in Dante’s seventh ring of hell; NO, I have never felt the need for a quest of self-discovery. I always write in the hopes of finding you. In writing, though I discovered I am a criminal of the worst type; I am a thief, stealing moments of sunshine; I am a fraud saying damnably that every little thing would be alright, but the worst was the horrible truths. My fingers like knives; my screen a victim that I would wound with each keystroke, I would maim and destroy, every result, every dream murdered, but always a journey well worth it. Though, I have never found you; which might be a good thing as I would have broken and bloodied you, as well. I always found myself just within inches of you, then being torn away amazingly to some other unknown hell. I still love that boy with green eyes and wide shoulders; that thievish smile that could whisk away my girlish mind and heart… alas now I am far from a girl and he, no longer a boy; growing always a horror, but in the ether, I know you became a glorious man. I know I somehow missed my chance; missed him entirely, never finding him in this world, but there is always the next and the one after, and even the one after that. My brother laughs, deep, hearty, beautiful; I smile, looking up out of my own thoughts; yet, I lament that I only have the one brother now. Of those in life that take their leave, I had never imagined that they would be among those that would have cut our mooring, setting us further adrift with a happy smile; waving us a happy farewell. I watch as my family hugs, holding each other. This is all I ever need, these few that I LOVE, to be happy. Plucking on a guitar my father sings one of his nonsensical songs and I remember back to being that girl who thought those songs to always be the very best; Glad, that these were all part of my story, part of my stories. As a great con artist once told me, as he was cleaning me out, that to make it convincing all good lies need at least eighty percent truth, if not more, to make it that much more believable, the con is in the details; those little threads of gold and silver that sew the story together; it really is simple that the human mind sees the plain and simple truth, pulls it in, but we focus on those thready details. Like a ghost, I see some phantom shadow, in the dark just past the firelight boundary; shaking my head clearing the bourbon cob webs, I thought I spied Life, himself; I thought I saw him, wide shoulders lovingly held in a dark warm pea coat, the white of his teeth as he smiled. Dark jeans and shirt with that damn face. I sighed, sinking back into the music, into memory, it would be a delicious little story; my father along with several friends raise their voices, rousing that music to a divinely atonal fit of harmonious laughter. I basked in it and swirled the ice in my glass, letting the firelight play with the colour. I know that Life had told me that he no longer cared for me; that I never really was worth his time; leaving me in a heap to die in a desert; Terminus, like his brother, thought me too much effort to keep, like a badly behaved puppy abandoned but the highway; he didn’t feel the need to step into lifes footprints just yet; so, alas it couldn’t be either of them. Ironically, I was not alive enough for one; yet not enough of a corpse for the other; dammit, it seems everyone else simply is ALIVE or they die, easily, happily. Here I was, stuck in almost a purgatory state, but I suppose I shouldn’t complain, there are worse options… there are always worse options. Watching the waves crash, listening to the rush and fall, the light wind kissing my face and I rested back against the driftwood log, taking a long drink. I had known battle; I have battled bloody for the things I wanted… needed. I have found… most of my wishes; I now knew what it feels like to be as free as the air; I had seen and felt so much; I have tasted every flavour found and found, yes, some that left the palate soured for decades; Of late I have known ease and pleasure and both were so delicious, I have some friends and love my family, but I… I still long to be dearly loved; god don’t get me wrong I am loved, but not passionately; not that tarry to the edge of madness kind of love, love. I stand, shrugging, I down the rest of my drink smiling into the warm hug it wrapped me in. I look down at my bare feet, toes buried in the sand, the cuffs of my Levi’s stopping mid-calf. What an end to the story. I shiver as warm softness at my back delights my senses, I breathe in a familiar scent. I lean my head slightly to the side closing my eyes. I felt his warm breath caress my ear, his frame dwarf my own, the mellow hint of bourbon and possibly tobacco carried on his sigh. It danced across my neck to my ear, caressing my cheek, brushing my lips. “Stories,” His voice low almost a whisper, husky and deep, like rolling thunder, delicious, “all we are made of is stories.” His lips, almost, not quite, but almost, graze the lobe of my ear; god, he didn’t have to touch me, that damn voice made my knees weak. “Good stories, bad stories, sometimes even sad stories, it is all that we are.” My soul simpered almost panting; though, the breath in me had seized, I panted; this was the sound that caused the entire universe to mellow to a low hum. “It has been said that stories are nothing but lies.” I sighed out, breath escaping my lips. “Oh, but those stories that seem the most full of lies hold our deepest hidden truths.” He growled low in my ear, nuzzling my neck. “Lie to me.” he pleaded I laughed and squealed as his sigh seeped into my every synapse, “The truth is I never knew how to describe you to anyone. You were always beautifully yourself and to me… that is perfection.” “Mmm, what a delightful lie, deliciously truthful. I found you, finally. If you had known where I searched, all of the hells I have seen that you had already passed through, always missing you by moments...“ He pulls me tight, the air rushed from my lungs; oh, the dizzying passion made my knees weak. “You and I… we were meant to be the most wonderful collection of unwritten poems and never to be painted masterpieces.” His words intoxicated my mind, I never am sure what is real and what simply happened in my mind. Real or not, he delighted my senses his lips his teeth delighted my neck, teasing, kissing, softly licking. I let out a soft moan falling back; wrapping myself into him; folding myself into his arms; he curled me close lavishing my neck with kisses making my bones dissolve. I sigh, I gasp, I am lost in that world of feeling. The literal rumble of his voice reverberates off of my every cell, “I had always thought your laugh would be my favourite thing about you, but god that moan… once I heard those sighs, that gasp, it is like a siren’s song. I would happily drown.” He sighed turning me in his arms, holding me tight cradling me in the safety of his strong arms. My eyes take him in, he was not Life, not Terminus, he was living breathing, he was real. A human, but still it is that face that always haunts me. “Finally, safely I am home.” I relaxed in his arms “No, sweet there is no such thing as safety; there is no such thing, we can hold each other in the darkness, but that doesn’t make the darkness go away. The nightmares still walk; horror is still there, but when we are here to hold each other we feel not alone which is the best a human could hope for. ‘its fine’ we whisper to each other, ‘I am here,’ ‘I love you,’ we even lie ‘I will never leave.’ So just for a moment, we are not alone and the darkness isn’t so terrible.” I tense and try to push away from him, my moment shattered. “Then why even bother, it is not even worth it, go back to the dark.” “Oh, but my sweet it is always worth having tried; even if we fail, if we fall like a meteor forever burning across the sky it is always worth having tried. Better to have flamed in the darkness to show others the way; to have lived if just for a second; to have flown if only for the 86 seconds from the sky to the ground; it is better to have loved, than have sat alone in the darkness, cursing those who never knew we were there.” “And if we do burn out like that meteor?” “Oh, darling, but if we don’t.” He kissed me sucking every ounce of oxygen from my lungs, he tasted of strong bourbon and mellow tobacco, his lips soft their caress wanting, begging, not demanding, pleading . His hands held my face caressing, touching, playing with my hair He lifted those lush lips and spoke even deeper, so earnest, his eyes locked on mine. “And if we do burn out, I was just born when you kissed me; I will die when you leave, but in those few wonderful moments, we love, I will have lived.” He pulled me into his thick jacket holding me to him, he kissed my lips, my neck, we spent moments so close to the sun even though the moon hung high in the sky. We talked of shoes and ships, of cabbages and kings and sealing wax and why his name tasted of honey on my tongue and why does time move and keep moving; yet, love stands still; we paddled comfortably not gripping or clinging or holding on too tightly; in this field of dreams wondering never where it would all go and whether to or why fors of this world. We never asked was this…or was this not truly love… we just were. The fire crackled and the surf roared and for moments, our hearts beat in synchrony. ~Indomitably. ..whatever

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carraville · 7 years ago

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Hi there I'm writing a fic and wondered if you could help me with something. I don't know an awful lot about David beckham Paul scholes and Phil Neville. I know your a man Utd fan and you'll probably love them all haha but just tell me what they're like from what you can gather as people and players. Even if it's just your opinion that's fine! Thanks so much for your help

ok SO i do love them a lot and i know much more about them than i ought to, so much so to the point that it might be more useful if you had something more specific you need to ask about, because i…am far too involved in them??? buT general-wise i wrote a draft primer on the co92 a while ago and I’m just going to copy and paste from there and hope this helps!!!!

putting this under a read more because this is....long

BECKS:

Everyone and their mum (especially their mums, probably) knows who David Beckham is, but did you know him when he thought that curtains were not just to make windows pretty but also for hair? Did you? Because curtain becks is almost as bad as half-alive mullet becks (although nothing can beat cornrow becks in the history of what the fuck were you thinking, let’s be real).

What can I tell you about Becks that you don’t already know? He has OCD and has to have an even number of coke cans in the fridge. He took cooking classes when he was at Milan and learnt how to make pasta (a far cry from his humble beginnings in Gary Neville’s kitchen). His middle name is Robert for Bobby Charlton. He’s honestly a more down-to-earth and clever bloke than people give him the credit for and he’s really just a little boy who’s loving what he does and works incredibly hard for it? A lot of people always remember the underwear modeling (for good reason, I mean, have you seen) but in doing so they dismiss his playing days, which is ridiculous because he was so fucking good. And hey, you can be good at both football and looking like a life-sized, anatomically correct Ken doll! His crosses were exquisite, his free kicks were sublime, and the partnership he had with Gaz is still guilty of murder for killing me through old, grainy youtube videos. Also everyone’s always keen to stress that he’s never really let fame change him or the way he deals with people, which is lovely.

If you wanna kill urself, watch his retirement interview with Gary, because it perfectly sums up who he is. Boy from Leytonstone who wanted to play football. He’s so insistent on being remembered as a player that it really breaks your heart that more people don’t. No one talks about how he tried that Wimbledon goal every day in training, or how he still hits exquisite free kicks aged 40plus because he practiced them for so damn long. He’s a beautiful talented hardworking boy and I lov him!! and he’s not arrogant or anything at all he’s just so cool!

Becks left United in 2003 after a bit of a bust up with Fergie, even though they remain on great terms nowadays. It broke everyone’s heart, it broke Gary’s heart, but it wasn’t so bad for Becks bc he found a Spanish goalkeeper to frolic around with. Still couldn’t watch us play for years, though, so there!!! In 2007 he moved to LA Galaxy, in 2013 he moved to PSG, and he retired then. It was great, he got thrown into the air and shit bc he was retiring so it wouldn’t matter if he broke his legs. ffs lads.

Fun fact: I still laugh at the fact that his house in Hertfordshire was called Beckhingham Palace

SCHOLESY:

My favourite story of him regarding this Intense Dislike for Humanity is this one: after the 2008 CL final, which we won, he was the first and only one on the team bus while everyone else was ostensibly getting drunk off their tits. At the next press conference, reporters asked him if he’d wanted to have some time to himself and reflect on how he’d finally gotten redemption for 1999. He stared at them and said, “I just wanted to go home.”

IDC IF IT’S AN URBAN MYTH IT BASICALLY SUMS HIM UP ENTIRELY.

My other favourite story of him is him telling AC Milan’s president that ‘if you want me to play for you, you’ll have to buy this club’, because we’re the best club in the world. Seriously, his love for United is so great. Sometimes he’s described as an Oldham fan, but he’s said before that it was United first and Oldham second. Did I say ‘said’? I probably meant smoke-signalled it because this bitch is so hard to get interviews with. There’s this great one where he’d just retired or something so the BBC got him to do an interview and their first question was ‘is this a living hell for you, then?’ and his response was ‘it is, really, yeah…I’ve been thinking to myself ‘why the hell did I agree to this???’. I know people have been knocking him for talking a lot more nowadays but a) he’s a pundit, it’s his job to talk and b) I rly think it’s just because it’s his only link with football that he has left?? So he puts himself thru it, because he just loves football so much, and that makes me love him even more? The directors of CO92 had a kickabout with him and described it as watching a little boy play again and I think that’s just the most beautiful and pure thing and Scholesy is so pure. Except when he’s setting people on fire.

BC HE DOES THAT A LOT, like, you think he’s quiet so he ain’t gonna be up for much banter but, my dude, he is the most savage person you will ever encounter. The closest I’ve ever seen him come to pissing himself laughing was when he was describing attacking Phil with a 50-yarder and knocking a POOR INNOCENT BOY flat on the ground. Laughing at that! Also his sense of humour is absolute wreckage. Gary has the best story:

People think Scholesy’s shy and quiet but he’s one of the most cutting people I know. Example: the day Diana Law, who worked in United’s press department, was chatting with the players. “Gary, you remind me of my brother for some reason,” she said. “Why?” Scholesy replied, quick as a flash. “Is he a knob too?”

HAHAH u knob. AnyWAY this is getting long but tldr tiny ginger little shit who hates the world and would probably hate how much i love him. He debuted for United in 1994, scoring twice against Port Vale, and retired in 2011, then unretired in 2012 and waltzed into our starting XI, and then retired again in 2013. So the only person we could find to replace Paul Scholes was Paul Scholes. smh.

Fun fact: he used to steal all of Gary’s shit and hide things and he’s SUCH A LITTLE SHIT, both literally and figuratively, I love it

PHIL:

ok phil is just the sweetest purest cinnamon roll you will ever meet, ever, I mean you probably won’t ever meet him but u know what i mean. Sometimes I think he’s too sweet bc he’s such a dumb pushover. Someone once said he was everyone’s favourite Neville just by virtue of being not Gary. Which is hilarious. ANyway he’s a fuckin sweetie pie and family man who constantly refers to his kids has his babies even tho Harvey is, like, old enough to drive I think?? and he’s an incredibly good dad to Isabella especially who has cerebral palsy but he’s so!!!! supportive!!! and god what did we do to deserve this dumb boi. If we were doing a CO92/Spice Boys crossover he would be Redders hands down because he also gets a lot of stick, from his commentary to his analysis (I s’pose it doesn’t help when ur bruv keeps winning shit like pundit of the year), but he always takes it on the chin and laughs it off and keeps on being such a good person, kind to everyone he meets and genuinely good-natured. I love his self-deprecating humour, it’s the best thing. He also loves United a lot, altho probably not as much as he loves Gaz uwu

Ok, so he’s not the world’s most exciting or greatest player, but he was honestly rly talented and people can forget that?? I mean you don’t just make captain of Everton bc you’re the United captain’s lil bro. He scored some amazing goals when he was at United - maybe the olden day Jesse Lingard - not a great goal scorer but a scorer of great goals. And he was always so intent and almost enthusiastic going into things, which kinda mirrors his puppy personality, which I lov. because don’t let his puppy dog eyes and smile fool u, ok, he’s just as driven as all of them and he will get what he want. probably just with less blood and dead people than, like, scholesy.

He’s two years younger than the rest of them so he made his debut in ‘95 and then heartbreakingly left in 2005, going on to captain Everton (but not before scoring an own goal against us bc he loves us still really). He retired in 2013. All these kids retiring in the same year! Tsk. It’s like they planned it or something.

Fun fact: he was a brilliant cricketer and used to play with Freddie Flintoff. A tear shed for the hungover Philip at Buckingham Palace that we never had

#Anonymous #answered #i remember word counting this and it was like.....2k or 3k with the other lads as well #istg #there were also embarrassing pics but im too lazy to copy them over

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malefistache · 8 years ago

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Fanfiction: Henry’s Gift A Dragon Queen and Swan Queen happy ending. Inspired by my fanvideo

Summary: When Henry sends the Evil Queen to start over, her heart guides her to Maleficent. More than a happy ending this is an exciting beginning for the both of them, and the revelation of this story steers some feelings deep inside Emma.

“The Evil Queen went to the place where she could get a fresh start.”

After writing this, Henry turned to look at his mother, the not-so-evil Queen, and watched in amazement as a glowing aura engulfed her body and burst into light of many colors until there was nothing left in this realm, just the surreal memory of her brief but deeply marking presence.

“Where do you think she went?” asked her son.

“There’s no way to know for sure but… I have my ideas.”

Regina smiled fondly as she imagined the path her heart—the Evil Queen’s heart—had taken her. There were two roads she hadn’t dared explore in the past because any happiness that came near her grasp had always been taken away before she could have a taste. But this time was different. This time she knew love was strength and she was strong enough to beat fate and make her own destiny. Moreover she deserved it; Regina finally felt it in her heart, felt worthy.

Mother and son had dinner at Granny’s before heading home. Mary Margaret would be telling Emma the news of Regina’s resolution, let her know villains could get happy endings when love transformed their hearts from the inside out. It was good news for her daughter and her fiancé, a former villain too. They could be happy as well. They didn’t have to wait for the other shoe to drop, live their lives in fear of the utmost end. Not anymore. She was excited to tell them, especially Killian who needed the hope most.

Mary Margaret went to the docks to let her one-day son-in-law hear the great news: villains could get happy endings. She asked him to share them with Emma.

If only she had known their current situation. Known they’d just had a break up because he’d rather lie and get rid of the ghosts of his past than face the truth with Emma and beat their forsaken fate together.

Together… Killian remembered their argument.

If the Evil Queen could get her way, so could he. He was just as redeemed as her in his eyes and everyone else’s, wasn’t he? He’d done too much to win Emma’s heart and he wanted his happy ending, he wasn’t about to let it go just because he murdered a grandfather in the past. Besides, Emma didn’t mind it was her own grandfather; she was just mad he hadn’t told her. They could work it out even if her father might not. Emma would always forgive him. She was finally and completely devoted to him. He’d finally broken her walls; broken a wild horse into submission.

He made his choice to go back to her, but as he was going into the Jolly Roger to let his faithful servant Smee know he’d changed his mind about leaving Storybrooke behind so he could find himself, Gideon stopped him on his track.

“Seems the wind is in your favor,” came a voice from the quarterdeck.

“Gideon.” Hook was unpleasantly surprised.

“Do you hear that?” Gideon pointed above and around them at the sails. “It’s the sound of you going home, Captain.”

“What the bloody hell are you talking about, son of a… crocodile!” Hook yelled angrily.

“See, I need the power of the Savior and for that I need you gone.”

“You won’t take Emma from me! I’m not going anywhere without her!”

“Yes you are. And before you go: think a happy thought. You will need it.”

Gideon used his magic and sent Hook and his crew far into the sea and away forever through a whirlpool portal.

He sent him home, to the place where he’d found his true identity: Neverland.

He was Captain Hook, a pirate whose truest love was the Jolly Roger. Killian was the fake identity he had been forcing himself to present during the last months to Emma and her parents, but it was no longer him, it hadn’t been for nearly three hundred years. He’d only used his alter ego to obtain this prized possession: Emma the Savior. Neverland would remind him who he really was; a ruthless pirate who would stop at nothing until he got what he wanted, even if it took pretending to be a hero.

Gideon could see through the façade, could see how his influence darkened Emma’s heart and it tainted the Savior power through her, and for his purpose he needed the purest form of said magic he could attain.

“You will taint it no more,” Gideon vanished in a swirl of red smoke.

The next day, Emma went to visit her parents to share her own news with them, the news of her break up and of Hook’s murder of David’s father.

It had happened long ago but the wound was still fresh in her father’s heart after the Evil Queen had steered the wheel on the event to cause another crash in their lives and hurt them. But what had hurt was the truth behind the lie, behind the secrets Hook kept from them to keep up his heroic character and false redemption. It was all a lie to gain and maintain the favor of their little princess whose walls had been broken down rather than given time to heal and allowed to open a door to make way for someone worthy of her love. Henry had opened a door into her life; Hook had demolished his way inside her head and heart.

David was dumbfounded, angry and ashamed of having trusted Hook and even opened his heart to him despite the red flags and gut feeling that had lingered deep down since Neverland. He felt betrayed too as he’d let Hook play him like a puppet. He could only imagine what Emma was going through this moment: his same heartache, only a tenfold.

Snow was deeply sorry too because ever since they met, in a way, she’d pushed Emma toward men only to get hurt. First Graham, then Neal and now Hook. It was so big her need to see Emma emulate her ideal of happiness she didn’t really care who her daughter shared her life with, so as long as she was married to a man and hopefully had another child to make up for not raising Henry— like she chose to have to make up for giving her up. Now she was starting to see the errors of her ways. You couldn’t force love. True Love could only be found on your own search and journey together, grow strong roots before wanting to pick the fruit from the tree; the taste would be bitter, if there was any bearings to be picked.

True Love took time, patience, and beating their demons together. Literally.

Snow saw it more clearly then. She’d seen it before they had memory of the curse and she’d seen it in Ruby and Dorothy more recently.

It had always been on her face but she’d chosen to usher the strange thought away and pushed her daughter in a different direction than what came naturally to her: going after Regina. Emma was always looking after Regina, after her happy ending, even when it meant giving up her own— what she thought it was: Hook. Emma’s happy ending was seeing Regina happy, just as Regina showed all through their journey in hell Emma’s happiness was her true motive to come and stay with them, even when she’d just recovered what looked like her happy ending: Robin. The two of them only truly cared to see the other woman happy regardless of whom it was with, regardless of paying the price to make it happen.

Snow knew. But how was she to push her daughter again? Forcing things would always backfire because it wasn’t letting life take its natural course. On the contrary, if she were to meddle again she could ruin something genuine. As strange as the idea felt, it was stranger not to see what was clear as day.

All she could do for her daughter was embrace her. Show her, let her feel she was there for her. Mom and Dad would never abandon her again, she could let her sadness pour out, but it didn’t. Emma was holding back, as always. She still didn't allow herself to feel deeply; it scared her. She might open a can of worms she wasn’t ready to handle.

Oh, Emma. Snow sighed.

“I love you babygirl. Whatever you need, whatever you want you can count on us. We’re never leaving your side,” her mother spoke into her hair.

“Emma, my sweet princess...” David’s voice was breaking. “I’m sorry for not having been able to protect you from heartache. If only I could go back—”

“Stop. Dad. It isn’t your fault. There’s nothing you could’ve done to prevent it,” Emma gave him a sympathetic look. “I’m an adult. I can handle this. This isn’t something you want your parents interfering with— relationships.”

“We know…” Snow responded sadly.

David cried as he kissed Emma’s forehead, trying to convey all his feelings in that fatherly gesture.

“Mom, have you seen Henry? I haven’t seen him since he left with you and Regina to solve the split thing. Speaking of which, how did that go? Is Regina whole again, is she well?” Emma wiped the tears from her face and focused on her mother whose face twisted in a weird way. “Oh my God, what happened? Is Regina hurt? What happened, where is she?!” Emma was entering her panic mode and getting up from the table and already moving her hand slightly as if to poof away at whatever answer she heard.

“Easy, Emma. Regina is well,” Snow gently took her magical hand.

“So she’s back in one piece?” Her daughter asked.

“Not quite… but close enough.”

“What do you mean? Mom, Dad, explain?”

“Basically the Evil Queen used the shears to make herself a complete separate individual from Regina but Regina realized her evil half was hurting because Regina hated her—hated herself, and when she realized the root of her self loath she also realized she’d come a long way. She could forgive herself and has learned to love who she’s become thanks to us, to her family, and shared this love with the Evil Queen to help her make peace together. And after that the Evil Queen lifted the curse on me and Charming.”

“Whoa, that’s deep. But also messed up…” Emma’s brow furrowed. “Wait. You’re telling me we permanently have two Reginas in town?” Emma twitched her head lightly and she reminded her mother of a puppy.

There was a tiny glint of amusement in green eyes as well as confusion, but all in all she looked happier than she’d come home. “How will Regina mayor with her twin-clone?” Emma almost chuckled at the idea.

“She will mayor on her own. In fact, Henry was able to write a happy ending for his other mother, the twin-clone, like you say. Just not… here.” Snow answered.

“Huh?” Emma didn’t look as cheered up anymore.

“Just wait until he shows you,” her mother told her. This would be interesting.

“I will ask him later. I look like sh—awful right now and don’t want him to see me like this,” Emma corrected the word at her parent’s grimace.

“You could stay a while, maybe the week? Your room is still vacant, sweetheart,” Snow offered with a warm smile.

“That’s a great idea! I will go pick up your stuff from that scary house of yours and bring it over,” David went to get the keys of his truck.

“Wait. What? Hold on, I haven’t even said yes,” Emma was the dumbfounded one now. “Scary house, huh?” She raised an eyebrow at her father.

“Oops?” Her father apologized, kind of.

“It’s okay, dad. I don’t really want to go back to that scary house alone either.”

Her parents smiled at each other and David made it through the door to go pick up some of Emma’s belongings, which weren’t really many if you ignored the furniture.

Emma decided and asked her parents to hold the news of her sad story for a little while until she felt comfortable enough to share them. They had dinner and she went to sleep early. She first wanted to see how was Regina doing without her evil half and do some sheriffing in peace, seeing as how Gideon had not made an appearance in the last days. He seemed to be granting them a time of grace for some odd reason. Maybe he was reconsidering his position now that he’d had a taste at Emma’s superior power when he couldn't kill her.

Emma was acting funny during the short moments Regina saw her while working. She could read there was something wrong in her but she wanted to respect Emma's wall and let her share her troubles whenever she was ready. She wasn't sure how much she knew of the Evil Queen's new story because Emma had made no comments about it at all. It did make Regina a little nervous too but it was nothing to be ashamed of.

Emma had learned from her mother that Robin was gone for good too and it gave her some peace of mind to know this. Why? She didn’t know, but it felt good to know him gone once and for all. But she also wondered if it was him the Evil Queen had followed behind in this new story that appeared to Henry and which her mother kept changing the topic to avoid confirming her suspicions. Mary Margaret kept waving it away saying it was Henry’s story to share but she would be seeing him until the weekend because she was still upset and didn't want to burden him, besides he really needed to catch up with school and Emma didn't feel right asking Regina directly, so she just focused in work and would look at Regina without saying anything for long moments and then turn on her heel and leave, leaving her wondering what the hell was going on inside that blonde's head.

Emma picked Henry up from school on Friday evening, like she always did when it was her turn to have him for the next week. She couldn’t continue hiding she was back with her parents and had broken up with Hook and he had left town as soon as there was no lock to the outside world. She would be telling him after dinner.

They were upstairs in Emma’s old/new bedroom when Henry finally pulled out a newer, yet old storybook they were used to seeing from the Author’s library, which had materialized a new page the day after the Evil Queen was given a fresh start.

“The Evil Queen went to the place where she could get a fresh start,” Emma read from the page Henry wrote.

“And this is the page that manifested the day after! I swear I had nothing to do with that, but I may have done a bit here and there because her story was missing something, or rather: someone,” Henry excitedly said to Emma “so I had to use my skills to give her the missing piece,” he said proudly as he handed her over the book that continued writing itself.

In the picture there was the Evil Queen sharing True Love’s Kiss with Maleficent. Not Robin and not Daniel: Maleficent.

Emma was in shock. Her expression was very hard to decipher.

#swan queen #dragon queen #ouat fanfiction #sq fanfic #fic: Henry's Gift

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stargleeksil-blog · 7 years ago

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Criminal Minds s05e05 “From Cradle to Grave” review - or more aptly named, Hotch is being a bitch to Derek and I don’t like it.

Episode 05 – Cradle to Grave

I think it goes without saying that I apologize profusely for my burst of hormone back there in the previous review, I mean, what the fuck is up with me lately? I’m blaming it on the fact that I’m currently sick right before American Halloween…

I’m also not looking forward to this episode, because it suggests babies involved, and that’s just wrong.

Let’s see what happens and hope I don’t barf.

Well, here we go, a woman giving birth. Oh god. Blagh.

So she gave birth in a prison cell, they take her baby, and if it’s a girl they do something with her? Oh god.

“What’s next?”

Hotch reviewing cases with JJ is the cutest.

“What’s your take?”

“Really?”

Wait, he’s never let her weigh in her opinion before? That strikes me as beyond odd.

“Henry’s just going through a clingy stage.”

Awwww.

Wait. So Aaron is letting her leave early? Nice.

Crap. Dis bitch is back.

Wait. Is Hotch in trouble? Oh god.

Wait. Why would Hotch lie to JJ like that?

Pretty puppy in an elevator.

Pretty puppy getting a text.

Ooh, another email from the boss.

Wait. That’s the third email from Hotch. What’s up?

“Reid, what did I miss?”

“Oh, man, you’re not going to believe this. Some moron just posted a blog called ‘What Would Carl Sagan Do?’” oh my god, I am so in love with poodle.

“No, Reid, the case. What’s the case?”

“What case? What are you talking about?”

Wait, what’s going on now?

“… emails from Hotch …”

Oh dear.

Something’s up.

“Emails from Hotch? I didn’t get any emails from Hotch, did I?”

“Nothing.”

And can I just say, it’s so cute that he keeps a calculator nearby, even though he’s a genius XD

Uber weird.

“Did you get a chance to look at the files?”

“I just got them.”

How the fuck can he look at them if he just got them, huh?

Also, Derek is right, why is he the only one getting those emails and not the rest of the team? So weirded out.

“I’ll review it right now. Just give me an hour.”

“That’s not necessary.”

Then why send it to him? What the fuck is going on here? I don’t like where this is headed.

Ready for what, JJ? What the fuck is going on here?

Yikes, this case sounds psycho crazy sadist. Yeesh.

Yikers. He kills them shortly after giving birth in captivity. I’m having chills, and not the sexy kind.

William D. Tammeus: “You don’t really understand human nature unless you know why a child on a merry-go-round will wave at his parents every time around – and why his parents will always wave back.”

So does this mean I don’t get human nature?

Kidding, I get it. I think. I mean, I have an idea, but it might not be what this Tammeus guy has in mind, so according to him I may not have a true grasp of human nature. That’s unsettling, considering I’m human, and it’s in my nature … :O

I’m one again jealous of glassware. Frack.

My poodle trying to sit in a cool way with his leg pulled up, but he mostly looks like a man-child and I love him for that.

“Makes him good with his hands.”

They should really stop giving him these lines … it gives me way too much fodder XD

“Which makes his compulsion psych 101 – killing his mother over and over again for giving birth to him.” Damn, my baby is smart.

“I hate to say this, but what if the women are just a means to an end?”

Oh god, is this episode going to make me barf? Probably.

Oh dear.

And it’s not even three in the afternoon yet. Fuck.

Wait, they induced the labor? Fuck! Oh my god, that poor lady.

“All three moms had records. Drug use, drunk and disorderlies. But what’s more interesting is what he does after he kidnaps them.”

And by interesting, you definitely mean gross and inhumane, right?

So they cleaned her up, made her as healthy as possible and impregnated her so she could give birth? Oh dear. Fuck.

“What kind of sexual sadist gives his victims prenatal drugs?”

“The kind who takes care of the kids he’s having.”

Shit.

But baby boy doesn’t think so.

Hmmm.

I really hope this pans out for the better.

“He could be breeding.”

Gross.

Poodle in shades.

So adoption is the American way of child trafficking? Gross.

“There’d be a paper trail, though, wouldn’t there?”

“There are ways to hide your tracks.”

And do you have to smile when you say that to JJ, you sick weirdo?

Wait. So that’s an umbilical cord in that jar? EW!

Why do they have to give it to my baby? Ugh.

So gross.

I mean, don’t get me wrong, birth is amazing, and I’m still amazed that we can actually grow tiny human beings inside us, but saving that thing? Ew.

“Okay, know this – most adoption folk are like the nicest, most dedicated people in the world. There are, however, one or two skeezy ones.”

“How skeezy?”

“Super skeezy. I’ve got a spread sheet from one of them expecting compensation fro the baby I’m having.”

Wait what? Did she pose as a pregnant woman? I don’t follow.

“Something you want to tell me, Garcia?”

I knew it.

“Oh, that’s the sad part, my prince. The genetically perfect offspring of Penelope Garcia and Derek Morgan wouldn’t fetch top dollar.”

See, that, I find hard to believe.

“And then there’s the Swedish supermodel rule.”

“The what?’

“If I were to deliver a blond-haired, blue-eyed bundle of joy, I’d be set for life.”

Oh god, I died right now. I love you, lady.

“I would.”

“Morgan. I’d like for you to write up a preliminary profile.”

Wait. What? Didn’t they just finish up assessing they don’t have anything yet? I get the confused puppy look.

“We don’t have enough for that.”

Thank you.

“Well, that’s why it’s preliminary. A work-in-progress profile helps show us what we’re missing.”

Seriously?

“Okay. Sure.”

Yeah, because my baby is a good boy.

“He has, like, this access to God.” That sounds dangerous.

“So why not run her DNA against adoption records in surrounding states? Are you kidding? I think you’re brilliant.”

It’s not often that my goddess doles out such compliments. JJ, you should be honored.

“Hey, JJ, if we find this little girl, what’s going to happen to her?”

Why is my baby girl all of a sudden concerned?

“I lost my parents. Granted, I was older than she is, but …”

“What got me through where the people closest to me, and … if Monica’s daughter is with a good family and we take her away from them …”

Oh jeez, Penelope, you perfect human being, you.

“These people have a right to their granddaughter.”

JJ is also right. Damn.

“You’re right. Yeah. This sucks.”

Word to mouth.

So he’s finally learned to use a flip phone properly?

Also, it’s 2010, why is he still using a flip phone?

“What’s that?”

“Your profile. I disagree with your analysis.”

Wait. Did he just seriously eliminate like half his theory? What the fuck is up with you, Hotch? Why you dissing my baby like this?

“Hotch, are you serious?”

“It’s not a law review article, it’s just something for us to brainstorm.”

Thank you.

“But you only focused on one angle, Morgan, that the prenatal drugs indicate the presence of a wife or a girlfriend. We need more options.”

“Which I can give you once we make the proper deductions.”

“Hotch, you’re asking me to guess.”

What the fuck is going on here?

“Morgan, in order for the profile to be useful, it has to generate multiple scenarios about what the unsub is doing.”

What the fuck?

“Rewrite it.”

WHAT?

Fuck you, Hotch!

Just because Strauss is crawling up your ass and giving you prostate cancer, doesn’t mean you have to contaminate my puppy. Go to hell.

So the babies weren’t dropped off at an agency, they were dumped in a basket on the steps of churches like in old timey 19th century novels? Yeesh.

“Outside the murders, nothing about this unsub’s behavior profiles like a sexual sadist …”

“As I wrote.”

Baby, don’t get too hard on yourself, stop it.

And Hotch, you better watch yourself, cuz this mama is about to give you a good ass whooping.

“He could be married, though, his wife being a passive participant, taking care of the moms.”

See? You’re not useless, I love you, honey.

“Morgan, you’re here with me. We’ll finalize the profile.”

And my baby’s like, shit, he’s punishing me.

I thought you liked a spanking? No? Good to know.

Contemplative poodle is a pretty poodle.

This is where my poodle’s genius shows. And I love it.

“These kids you deduced to – have you looked at their files?”

“No. right now I’ve only been tracking churches. Why?”

Oh dear.

“Because you just uncovered another pattern.”

Oh baby, I love my poodle.

“They’re keeping the boys.”

Yup.

Dear lord, this is turning out to be sick.

Wait. They’re forcing the new girl to be the old girl’s midwife? Fuck. Damn.

“JJ, I need you to call these fertility specialist and get them over here for interviews.”

“Whoa.”

So it seems like a lot.

“Yeah, I know. Hotch wants to focus on the prenatal drugs the unsubs are giving the victims.”

Okay…

“He thinks we can build a new suspect pool, and he wants it done yesterday.”

Yeesh. Hotch is one big bitch.

“There’s two pages of names here. Shouldn’t we narrow it down?”

Uh yeah.

“JJ, just do it, okay?”

Wait. Hold up. Did my puppy just blow up at JJ? What the fuck?

“I’m sorry.”

Good puppy.

“Is everything okay?”

“Hotch has been on me ever since we got here, and for the life of me, I can’t figure out why.”

Uh, maybe because Strauss is up his ass?

So that lady just mixed up drugs and figured out how to induce pregnancy? Fuck.

Fuck, she has to actually measure with her hand how dilated she is, poor thing.

Fuck, I hope they make it there in time.

“What’s this?” Uh-oh. Angry puppy.

“It’s a tactical arrest plan. I’d like you to write it up for this case.”

Scoff.

“You want me to write up how we apprehend these unsubs without risking the lives of the children?” Wait, what? Shouldn’t it be better to just have him out there doing it, rather than coming up with the words for it? He’s a man of actin. Ask Reid to do it, you meanie.

“Hotch, I’ve led dozens of tactical assaults. You’ve never made me write up one of these before.”

“That’s because I always do it for you after each case.”

Wait what?

Scoff.

“You know what?”

What, baby?

“I’m sorry Strauss is coming down on you.”

They should really rethink how they phrase things.

“This is not about Strauss.”

Yeah, right.

“Look, I understand that you’re under the gun. But I gotta say it. I’m really not all that surprised.”

Wait, what?

“Of course the bureau’s worried about you.”

“Man, I’m worried about you.”

Cutie.

“But just because you’re the one who’s under the magnifying glass, that doesn’t mean I can’t do my job.”

So true.

“Morgan, there’s a big part of your job that I do for you because I don’t need you worried about paperwork and politics.”

Fuck you, bitch, who asked you to?

“I don’t have to justify my orders to you, and you do have to follow them.”

I hate it when he makes sense.

“I’ve always followed your orders, when they made sense.”

“Well, if you have a problem with this one, tell me now.”

“You’re the boss.”

Damn.

“Okay, so the gold star of the day goes to Agent David Rossi and his short list of one disease these prenatal drugs also treat.”

Oh honey, look how he’s so proud of getting Garcia’s approval XD

“Breast Cancer.”

Damn.

Yikes. The lady had to go through labor anyway even though she lost the baby? Dear lord.

“Well, that kind of physical and emotional trauma, there’s our stressor.”

Yup.

“I volunteer with a new mom counseling group.”

My cutie.

“Morgan, what’s your plan?”

So now he’s asking him to review his plan? What’s going on here?

“I think we should do a soft entry.”

I want it to be hard, honestly XD

“See if we can get the kids out before the parents even know what’s happening.”

“You’d be in the door first?”

Of course, gotta see those legs at work on kicking down doors.

“Do you have another idea?”

“Send Prentiss and JJ first.”

Wait. What?

“Children are more likely to trust a woman, and we need that presence.”

I guess he does have a point.

Doesn’t mean I like it.

“Hotch is right.”

See? We’re perfect together XD Okay, this is hot.

And so is this.

“FBI.”

Well, that is menacing.

“Ma’am, why don’t you give me the baby. We can talk about it.”

Yup.

“Why would I want to do that?”

Because he’s not your kid, and you need to let go. Bitch.

“What you’ve been doing is wrong. You must know that.”

Oh honey, trying to reason with a crazy person is never going to work.

Thank god they found them.

He’s so cute trying to reason with her.

“I would have been a wonderful mother.”

“Then prove it. Let him go.”

Bah.

What have we discussed about hot people holding babies? Are they purposefully trying to kill me prematurely?

At least it’s a happy ending to this case.

Wait. The kid they rescued was Monica’s? And he gets to go with his grandparents? Oh honey, that’s wonderful.

They’re really sticking with this full-circle trope, huh?

“Have a seat.”

Uh-oh.

“The bureau thinks that my ability to lead this team has been compromised.”

Well, duh.

“What do you think?”

Wait, now he wants Morgan’s input?

“Sometimes I question you, Hotch.”

Yeah, no kidding.

“But at the end of the day I do respect you.”

Damn straight. “You’re the leader of this team, and my job is to have your back.”

“Well, that’s not important to the bureau.”

Damn.

“They’ve been questioning me since Foyet’s attack. And they’re not entirely wrong.”

True.

“If Strauss replaces me, this whole unit will come under scrutiny. Members will be reassigned, budgets will be cut.”

Damn. So not happening.

“Come on, Hotch, nobody’s gonna replace you.”

I love you, baby.

“Fight Strauss.”

“I’ll go to the mat for you. So will everybody else. You know that.”

Damn straight.

“Unless I step down.”

Wait. Pump the breaks.

“Step down? What are you talking about?”

“I’m resigning as unit chief at the end of the week.”

“What?” WHAT?

“No!”

“Hotch, look, yeah, okay, sometimes your actions, I may disagree with them ��”

“But it’s not enough for you to leave this team.”

I love how he’s trying to protect his own.

“I’m not leaving the team, I’m just no longer in charge.”

Then who is.

“You are.”

“Me?”

What?

Fuck yes.

“Look, I had the chance to be unit chief in New York, and I said no.”

“I turned it down because I like this team.”

“Strauss can’t fire you like this.”

No, but she can reassign him. Damn.

“And we can avoid that if I promote internally.”

“This is wrong.”

“It’s the only way to keep the team together.”

Oh dear.

“This is why you’ve been pushing me so hard, huh?”

“I haven’t been pushing you that hard.”

“Will you do this?”

“This would be temporary.”

Wait. So Morgan’s gonna be in charge? Oh damn.

“Once we catch Foyet, all this goes back to normal.”

Oh honey, I love you, but I get you need to follow someone.

“Let’s get started.

“What’s all this?”

That’s a shit ton of paperwork, dude.

“This is the job, unless you have other plans?”

Hotch, you little shit.

“Not tonight.”

Penelope too busy with Lynch?

Okay, wow. This episode definitely threw me for a loop. So we started out by Hotch being a dick to my baby boy, which doesn’t sit well with me at all, then we have that awful case that has me ready with a barf bucket, and then they put Morgan in charge till they catch Foyet? Holy crap! I can’t wait to see my hot stuff barking orders. Hot.

All righty, I’m going to head straight for the next one, I want to crank these out asap. See you tomorrow <3

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