#Glit asks the real questions

[doctor-glitterbomb]

Glit snuggles up to TC, bemused. "Are you just saying that by rote? Because nothing that I suggested he do is illegal. I suggested that Star wait until Metalhawk requests something he shouldn't get--which happens at least five times a day when he's on the palace grounds--and politely deny it, then complain to him about how dreadfully rude Driveby's been being. How could any of that be illegal?"

"Star," Glit said gently, "consider this: dead mechs don't suffer. Make sure Metalhawk finds out about this in the most embarrassing way possible. Make sure he understands that Driveby's invitation to events here at the palace has been permanently revoked, preferably right after you've just had to deny some request of his--so he thinks they're related events. Then watch as his career goes up in smoke."

[ashanimus]

Ash Liveblogs MTME #28

IM SORRY I have notes for some of the others but I wanted to read and get caught up but dear gOD that weird crossover hurt my already waterlogged brain where is my war criminal sitcom---OH my fuck WHAT

This was not on Rung's bingo card asdlf;sdiajg

Oh dear GOD

I HAVE QUESTIONS. QUESTIONS THAT DONT NEED ANSWERS. THE LAST HORRIBLE QUESTION ABOUT TRANSFORMERS I ASKED WAS WHERE GLIT CAME FROM AND NATE KINDLY SPARED ME BUT DEAR GOD

This is the funniest thing I've ever seen a "heroic" character yell at someone in anger, I'm going to remember this until I die. The way work is going, possibly even by face palm! Thanks Rod!

Yes yes blah blah, I know youre going to pardon Megatron, Optimus where are my ships and what have they been doing for the last six months

FADSG

Why is Swerve "let me be the one to tell Tailgate he's been displaced out of time"the one in charge of this panel

Also, Swerve, bring to the party!? Excuse me!!? The only thing the people on this god damn boat have brought to the party are DISORDERS

Oh okay this makes more sense

Eeeesh

Optimus, Rod...y'all. I know part of the joy of this comic is how messy it all is but there's something real weird to me about Optimus sitting in judgment of Megatron of all people. Like it makes sense that Rod's all, well, this:

But surely, SURELY Guys, there is a difference between symbolic and cruel? ALthough perhaps to a political, end, there can't be.

WEFJFASG WE ARE COPING I SEE

Chromedome...

They're all doing their best and their best is a goddamn disaster---ASDLAKSJG WHIRL NO

Whirl, there's no way you come out on top on this one in any way

Back to that symbolic/cruel thing I see. But also, Megatron more than anyone has the perspective to understand what Whirl was at the time (where I don't really see the same kind of wisdom in Whirl, who is better at perceiving other people's fears in what feels like an attempt to distract from his own) -- someone also at the end of a social rope with few options doing what he was told. Doesn't change it but, it is interesting. I'm very tired. I need to be more awake for this.

HMMMMM

[rere-the-writer]

Aaah that last klaus one shot was so fluffy!! Could you do poly!mikaelsons with like a super sweet reader / just overall fluffy moments :)

Yes all of the fluff!

Warnings: Fluff, like all of the fluff

A/N: wanted an excuse for the idea of painting Elijah like some sexualized lady.

Hayley noticed that the Mikaelsons were running all over the Abattoir cleaning things up, seemly excited for something. She was confused hearing Rebekah yell that she got fresh sheets while Kol ran up carrying blankets.

"I'm home!" Hayley heard a voice say and looked seeing you, a woman with a beautiful caramel tan hair cut in a cute bob dressed in a sundress. Kol was the first to reach you picking you hugging you spinning you both.

"My beautiful darling!" Kol said happily as you laughed hugging Kol peppering him with kisses. Rebekah squealed happily running over surprising Hayley when the blonde hugged you kissing you like no tomorrow.

"Hello to you too Beka." You say flushing as Kol hugged you from behind sandwiching you between the Originals as they hugged you.

"Stop hogging the girl." Klaus said as Rebekah and Kol let you hug the hybrid smiling as he buried his face in your neck. He took in your scent noting you changed your perfume not that he minded finding it lovely.

"I would like to hold our wife too." Elijah said surprising Hayley as you hugged the noble vampire but he had a different idea instead cupped your cheek kissing gently at first but it quickly turned into something more hungry.

"Elijah! You'll scare her!" Rebekah says as you squeaked while Rebekah and Kol saved you from being eaten by Elijah when they saw the glit in his eye.

"I'm sorry but who is this?" Hayley asked walking over as you looked at her up and down.

"Hi I'm Y/N L/N." You tell Hayley with a smile as Rebekah wrapped her arms around you.

"Come love, let's get you unpacked and you can tell me and Kol about your trip."

"Okay." You said following after Rebekah with Kol close behind. Elijah smiled as Hayley moved next to him.

"Who is she?"

"Our lover. She was seeing her family back in Greece. Her sister was getting married." Elijah answered Hayley surprising while Klaus brought you other bags in.

"Your lover? You share a lover?"

"We do. She would be the third person we've shared." Elijah said watching you run down the stairs. You jumped into Elijah's arms as he caught you with ease not caring at Hayley was staring.

"Hello baby. Need something?"

"Can I stay in your room tonight?" You asked Elijah as his eyes darken a growl coming from deep in his chest.

"Does my baby want to be devoured?" Elijah whispered hotly in your ear making a shiver run down your back nodding. As Hayley frowned watch Elijah take you up to his bedroom to help you settle in.

Over the week Hayley was trying to get used to the fact that the Mikaelsons was dating you and how soft you were. You baked and cooked for them as you were all too sweet which made Hayley wonder why they would date you.

Hayley walked in seeing you cuddled up to Kol as Rebekah cuddling you. The three of you taking about the movie you were watching.

"If we were to get married I want to be a winter wedding too." You tell them as Rebekah hummed rubbing your side as Kol ran his hand over your hair.

"You would marry us?"

"Yeah I mean I am practically married to Beka and Eli. So why not marry all of you." You said as Kol laughed as Rebekah smiled.

"You'll look just gorgeous in a wedding dress." Rebekah said as you lightly kiss kissing her head. Hayley left surprised with how easy it was for them to be affectionate with you.

"Klaus have you.....seen Elijah?" Hayley trailed off walking into Klaus's art studio two days later. Hayley swallowed staring seeing Elijah dressed in tight pants with a white botton up that was have open and a bit wet sticking to his strong chest as he layed on a bed seemly posing.

While you sat on a stood in front of an esle holding a canvas as you were painting Elijah with careful brush stokes. Klaus was digging in an old chest for colors you needed for your painting.

"Need something Hayley?"

"No moving Elijah." You tell the vampire as he gave a apologetic smile laying his head back in position.

"What is this?"

"We are helping our lovely girl pass her art history course." Klaus says as you stood walking around the painting leaning over Elijah moving his hair a bit more in his face.

"That doesn't answer my question."

"I have to recreate a Renaissance style painting. My professor is a real piece of work by making us paint so we can understand the history better." You say pushing up your glasses sitting back down as Klaus walked over with paints you needed.

"Oh....did she do this one?" Hayley asked pausing seeing another painting of Rebekah in a 10th century dress sitting in a chair with Kol standing behind her.

"Yes, she got an A on that one." Klaus praised as your cheeks warmed as Hayley looked at Elijah swallowing again. Elijah looked too good layed out as he was and Hayley noticed how you bit your bottom lip a bit.

"Isn't kinda objectifying Elijah."

"It isn't if he was the one who started this. I was just going to paint some flowers or a sunset." You tell Hayley as Elijah smirked undoing another botton on his shirt when he caught how you squeezed your thighs together.

"I refuse for you to not get an A. Also think of it as me flirting." Elijah says as you let out a laugh while Klaus chuckled.

"Babe, this too much just to flirt." You tease as Klaus stood behind you resting his chin on your shoulder helping you as Hayley walked out forgetting what she wanted Elijah for.

"Rhea called." You say as you were braiding flowers into Hope's hair when Hayley walked in to pick up Hope as Klaus was sitting behind you also braiding flowers in your hair.

"What did your sister need?"

"She wanted to know if I married you all yet." You answered Klaus as he chuckled finishing up the braid. Hope smiled up at you much like her father she adored you.

"You call her back and tell her Elijah and Rebekah is looking for the prefect ring." Kol teased getting smacked by a pillow from Rebekah to which Hope got up to joined Rebekah.

"What going here?" Elijah asked standing next to Hayley seeing you helping beat Kol with pillows. Elijah ignored how Hayley seemed to lean into him.

"A pillow fight and proposals 'Lijah." Klaus answered seeing you laugh with Hope as you both were getting attack by Kol and Rebekah.

"I see. Hayley, what brings you by?"

"To take Hope to see Mary." Hayley said as you all paused when you accidentally hit the older Mikaelson with a pillow.

"Eli.....I'm sorry." You squeaked out seeing the predatory glit in Elijah's eyes as he made his way to you. Your laughter rang out when Elijah tickled you.

"Hope is going to be awhile." Klaus said when Hope joined Elijah in tickling you while Rebekah and Kol was hitting him with pillows. You were panting laying on Elijah as Hope layed Kol trying not to fall asleep and Rebekah was laying next to Kol as you all were tired from the fight.

Hayley was surprised when she got the invite to a ball that Klaus was throwing. A proposal ball, Hayley felt jealously flood her knowing that she was going to lose Elijah. Mean while you were cuddling Rebekah and Elijah as you were watching a random movie with your vampire lovers.

"I love you all"

"And we love you." Rebekah said kissing your head as you snuggled closer to the two as you all enjoyed the quiet.

[konvenient-pop]

Okay, so, here comes an annoying post about me being annoyed

With the topic of Jenny and Kai

To start this off right, I want to begin with by saying this is not a hate post at all. In actuality I am an EXO-L, and particularly a huge fan of Kai/Nini despite this blog not representing that. I have a lot of respect for him as a person first and foremost, as well as in his career as an idol. Although my respect isn't reflected with Jennie personally, as I deliberately refused to hop on the Blackpink bandwagon for the sake of preserving an original opinion after a few years of watching over their comebacks to make the decision of draining my life energy for another group, I still have respect for her as an idol. No matter what I will have at least a basic respect for the people choosing to enter this career, since we all know what that means longterm. Or at least most of us who have made the mistake(?) of spiraling into the darker side of this industry.

But at the risk of sounding pretentious or scaring people for no reason, returning to my original point, I don't know jack shit about Jennie. Well, beside basic surface level information or personality overviews from Weekly Idol or what have you. Again, all surface level. For now I am fine with that, she seems cool and honestly like a genuinely straightforward person in terms of setting up her goals. Or at least that's the picture I've crafted in my head after having listened to her on old G-Draon's tracks, as she was probably offered the oppertunity and had enough sense/drive to take it. So, okay, cool. She's cool, Jongin is Jongin and as a couple they are whatever.

Whatever being cool, cool being something I can go 'Oh?' at with raised eyebrows and move on with my damn life. Or as I failed to name it, basically sonething of minimal interest. Now, let's pause. So, I have no problem with this couple, so why the hell am I even bothering with this post? Well, that's because it's goddamn annoying to see all the 'I came here for JenKai' or otherwise judgmental comments on YouTube. To vent, why the hell can't people just be indifferent to things they have no knowledge over? Like, sure, you know one of the two and can say 'Well he/she is such and such trait, but I don't know about him/her', but why badmouth? This is my problem. This is what annoys me.

As far as I'm concerned at this point there's no point in judging these couples anymore, because again for the nth fucking time we do not actually know these people we dedicate our lives to. Sure, you can claim otherwise since we get years of interviews and yeaes of reality shows and years of behind the scenes videos and what the fuck ever, but let's be serious here. We aren't their friends, we aren't their family. What we get is what they chose to show. Of course most idols tend be genuine in terms of trying to show their honest personality or giving factual information, but at the end of the day it's just a video. One video, one clip, one moment in time that does not dictate their entire personality, struggle, interests, or life. That's something I often see people in this fandom forgetting and honestly at this stage of stanning cancel my subscription if we can't be logical about relationship reveals.

That's not to say most fans haven't been. In fact so far I've seen quite the opposite with mostly support, which is cool and something that I'm not use to but thank the gods for it. But there are still some you know what's here and there. They're really not that bothersome in terms of overall big picture whatever, since they are just words on my computer or phone I can click off of and will likely drown in a sea of support. Still, I just want to vent and ramble and maybe point out something that we all already knew for the sake of a friendly(-ish?) reminder. And for that to happen, I too will attempt honesty.

Being real, my first reaction was mostly worry and (negitively concentrated) confusion. Worry for fan reaction over actual puppy Nini. Confusion because how the hell did that happen and why would they get together? It took about half the day, but then I finally used my good sense to reroute my thoughts back to that very important fact. I don't know them. As people, or as a couple. I don't know their everday lives. I, nor you reading, have any right to judge if they are good for one another or not. No matter if opposites actually attract or similar people enter similar love, it is not up to me to decide for them based off what I think I know even if I do want them to be together. I have no right, nor actual authority to do so especially being just a fan. All in all, I am not in this relationship. Neither are you and this applies to you and every other fan out there.

So, basically that's just to say people enter relationships at their own will, as their own people most of the time with knowledge of who their partner is as a person, and it's never any of our business beyond the basic level of having an objevtive opinion that shouldn't affect them (*COUGH COUGH* sending hate messages or death threats *COUGH COUGH*) because we are lucky they even decide to share any of this shit with us. Does that make any sense? Don't know, don't care, I refuse to go reread and edit this just to sound nice. Why? Because I'm probably deleting this, as long as I don't forget. Why? Because I honestly just wanted to talk about how annoying it's going to be reading those 'Jennie get your man'/'Jennie's boyfriend this'/'Kai and Jenny that' and etc type comments over the next few months, but this ended up turning into a whole thing.

But yeah, I find that shit annoying. Mostly because it almost belittles idols, degrading them to only face value in a way because they are 'only' recognized for who they date. It is annoying with them and it was annoying with Bora and Feeldog. And I love these people too much to watch that. Though, of course, I know it is not done in offense. People just like couples and are excited love still exists in the world for their precious idols, I know. I get it. I just hate having to look at an idol and think of their current or past significant other. Feels like I'm doing them a disservice, espscially when they started out as just their original selves that I spent YEARS getting to know but suddently I don't feel like I know them anymore as just that. Their pure, individual selves.

I don't know. My bitch ass is dramatic like this and usually I would never speak on this because I want K-pop to just be good fun despite its dark secrets, questionable concepts, and unfavorable features, but sometimes certain shit just gets annoying. And then I feel the need to rant for months before ranting to non K-pop friends or making a whole post no one asked for. In any case, since we're enjoying a rare rant post specifically centered around couples in the industry, might as well give my opinion on the few funny thing that came out of this.

With the outing of Kai's newest relationship, I can finally say seeing my idols date doesn't feel weird anymore. Usually I would get weeks of a weird mourning type feeling, despite knowing and accepting I won't be with my idols romantically. Which, by the way, I actually prefer since I am gross thank you very much. But like, its just a feeling I usually have. Kind of mourning what can't be, kind of fearing how someone knows a part of them I don't. Yeah, I know it is gross and weird, but again to remibd you I spent years draining life energy just to feel like I 'know' and to feel 'close' to these people so logically its the emotional connection (and lowkey emotional dependence), which is why I always feel I can understand when fans say they get sad or cry once idols start marrying or whatever. But, thank the gods, lately said feelings have been coming and going quicker. I assume its due to most of my idols getting older now and my actually wanting them to find love and create their happy ever afters if possible, especially with most of them wanting to get married and actually wanting kids unlike myself.

Like recently, recently for me being years ago sorry, with both UKISS's Dongwo and Eli having to marry in secret and revealing their sons to the world helped really set those new type of support feels in place for me. Going back and knowing who wants what, I now want themselve to achieve these things. Be it love, a family, or simply something new and/or outside of their idol career (quick cringey magical support hwaiting to my not actual husband Bang Yongguk), I want for them to want these things and to continue wanting normal things. Why? Because they are, hopefully you guessed it, normal human beings. Outside of all the glits and glamour of being an idol, representing their home, and trying too damn hard for fans, they are just people.

As it always goes and as cheesy as it probably sounds by now, just people like you and me. People who want things and feel they need to achieve or have certain things to live a fulfilled life or feel accomplished in life before they die. So, yeah, there ya go. My support got some type of Pokemon upgrade ('Idol's Dreams' I chose you?) and I am annoyed because I can't stop my brain from being reminded of other people in the face of my idols. Rip individuality I guess, until that dies down. Anyway, back to your scrolling. I don't know why this ended being so long.

P.S.: As for the rest of those few funny things (1) I am still salty over the treatment and reaction of Baekhyun/Taehyeon and Kai/Krystal by fans (also dramatic and emotionally leave Krystal alone), (2) Hyuna/E'Dawn, despite being great and hopefully a love revolution that will be real I do think they also handled that situation poorly as far as business goes but I do love and support both in case anyone cared, (3) quick claps for the recent emotional growth of K-pop fans tbh as far as relstionships so far, and (4) for whatevet reason I wasn't expecting people to drag my girl Krystal into this. Usually I'm on top of my game with guessing and predicting, but bless her for the next few (hopefully just) weeks. Being the ex is always annoying as fuck.

[melyaliz]

It’s Britney Bitch

Summary: The Story of how Jennifer and Dick went to see Britney in Vegas. 

Pairing: Dick x OC 

Notes: So many ideas for this... it’s a bit choppy but was WAY too much fun to write. Dick’s love for Britney is inspired by my best friend who will fight you if you look at Britney wrong. 

Maia @royslittleharper

Annabella @the-shadow-of-atlantis

Tagging: @guns-n-lilies @coffee-randomness @daisyboobear @werewitchling @nightwing-rules

Sometimes being a hero was just too much. While Dick was normally good at compartmentalizing his lives some days it was just too much. One small slip up, one civilian lost and it would all come crashing down on the boy.

 Today was one of those days.

 Dick lay on his bed just staring at the ceiling letting the events of the past week play out in his head. Over and over again. Lost in a circle of “what ifs”

 The sound of music a the knock on his door suddenly broke the cycle.

 “Go away” he yelled

 He was answered by another knock. Sighing he pulled himself up walking toward the door.

 “I’m not in the moo..” his words were cut off by Jen throwing a fuzzy pink boa around his neck pulling him into the hallway. His sister Annabella holding up a jukebox blasting Britney Spears.

 “Come Dance!” Jen sang twirling around pulling him toward the stairs. He couldn’t help but laugh at their ridiculousness as he let them lead him down to the living room where the speakers blasted his favorite's from the pop star.

 A few hours later Bruce found them sprawled out on the couch. Annabella’s head resting in Jennifer’s lap asleep while Dick and Jen watched Britney's music video “Baby One More Time”. Dick explaining all the work that was put into the production his hand gently playing with Jen’s as she giggled at his excitement of the performance.

 “She’s a true entertainer.”

 “Yep.”

 ----

 Jen let out a long breath as she bent down over her feet on her Yoga mat. Slowly she moved from a downward dog to a Warrior slowly breathing. Deep breaths, in and out, trying to clear her head as her phone buzzed. Dick frantically trying to explain himself and why did had not told her about Jason’s resurrection.

 But she wasn’t having it. Not today.

 Let him stew in his dishonesty.

 Jerk.

 Suddenly she heard her doorbell buzz and the sound of a beat she couldn't quite place. Frowning, confused, she stood walking toward the door, the beat getting louder. 

 Opening the door she was greeted by Dick holding up his cellphone blasting Britney, the pink fuzzy boa around his neck. He threw it around her before taking a step in.

 “Dick I’m still mad…”

 “Shhhhh,” he said shutting the door. “Just dance with me,” he added before pulling her toward the living room by the boa that was around her neck. She couldn't help but crack a smile as he sang the words to their favorite song “Circus”.

 -----

 "So Dick's birthday is in a month..." Faith said as she stretched before their practice session. Damian frowned from his place next to the punching bag.

"tt, So?"

 "I just have a great idea for a gift.”

 “You?” Damian said, “what are you going to get him? A box of ice cream?”

 “Ohhhh something so good I will become his favorite and he will ask me to be the next Robin.”

 Damian froze studying her, sometimes he had a hard time reading his cousin. While she was always saying outlandish things which he had learned to discredit, there was always those few that held some grains of truth to them. He knew she would never be Grayson’s favorite, but the thought didn’t sit well with him.

 “First off, am the heir to Batman and I could get Grayson a better gift in my sleep.”

 “Wana bet?”

 Tim sighed watching them. He knew Faith well enough to know she had an ulterior motive. Whenever she got that look in her eye she was scheming. Damian hadn’t been with them long enough or cared enough to really notice when Faith was up to no good.

 “If I win you have to be MY sidekick for a week.”

 “And if I win I get to be Robin for a week.”

 “You’re on!”

 Of course, everyone wanted to get in on the bet. Annabella joking that the idea of being Robin for a week was too tempting to pass up. Stephanie saying she already had the costume while Gigi really just wanted to be “part of the Bat-fam”

 Dick had never gotten so many gifts for his birthday.

 Stephanie found him the box of the iconic Wheaties with Nightwing’s face on them.

 Annabella had a remade Dick’s first costume “I fixed it, after all, I was the one who burned it last time” she said as he laughed looking it over.

 Tim and updated his suite with some amazing new features.

 Gigi got him a book with all the best Nightwing tweets. Several included the trending hashtags #nightbooty and #bestbatbooty. Maia may have stolen it to read a few out loud.

 Faith gave him a mini figure of Nightwing keyring. “For your belt” she giggled “he can have your back.”

 Damian couldn’t help but snicker as he proudly presented him with a katana from Japan, a one of the kind apparently. And better than anything else, especially a stupid little keychain which he didn’t fail to point out to Faith.

 “He can put little-wing on the hilt!” Faith cooed looking over the blade.

 “Don’t you dare!” Damian said glaring at the brunette who flashed him a sweet smile while Tim pried the blade from her hands concerned what the smaller boy would do to his girlfriend. The younger Wayne was about to add something else but Dick’s laughs cut him off.

 “Maia, what are these?” he asked holding up a pair of booty shorts with “Britney Bitch” written in pink rhinestones on the butt.

 “Open mine.” Jennifer said handing him an envelope, “and all will become clear.”

 Everyone fell silent as Dick opened the card quietly reading it then pulling out two tickets, his eyes growing wide. “No” he gasped holding them up.

 “Yep,” the older O’Neal sister said a huge smile on her face, “Two front row tickets to see Britney’s Vegas show opening day.”

 “OHHH!!!” Annabella squealed, “I get to do costumes!”

 “Take tons of pictures!” Gigi added, “I want to have tweets and everything!”

 “I’m so jealous” Maia cried, “I tried to get Jen to let me go instead of her!”

 “No way!” Jen laughed, “I am not missing this for the world.”

 --------

 "Hey Jen, can you just help me with this body glit..." Dick's voice cut off as all thoughts left him as Jennifer walked out.

 "That bad?" She giggled as he stood there mouth agape taking her in her "Slave for You" outfit complete with a stuffed animal boa constrictor. Slowly his expression grew to a lopsided goofy grin as he let out a low chuckle. 

 "You look amazing, Annabella knows her stuff."

 Jennifer giggled twirling around letting the beads and lace around her hips sparkle. “Right?” taking a step closer to him. Dick felt his heart pick up feeling slightly like a teenager again as he watched her, “now come here so I can bedazzle you”

 “Of course,” he said shivering slightly at her touch. They both may have already had a few drinks with dinner and a few more while getting ready. Which is what he choked up his nerves too. Just the alcohol.

 Nothing else.

 The concert hall was already packed by the time they go there. Of course, they had to take pictures and then stop to take a few more with other fans. A Bachelor party was so in love with their outfits that they ended up buying them drinks. One of the guys informing Dick that “if he wasn’t taken he would be tonight.” Jennifer was doubled over laughing so hard as Dick sat on the groom-to-be’s lap.

 “Just don’t tell my hubby,” the man said laughing.   

 “You guys are just too cute!” one of the girls in the group said taking a few more pictures, “You need to party with us all night!”

 Which they did. Drink and more drinks with a million more pictures before Britney came descending down like an angel from heaven. Quite literally in white feathers and all.

 Song after song while they sang at the top of their lungs dancing along with the beat.

 The music swelled and Dick couldn't help but admire the way Jen looked in the glow of flashing multi-colored lights laughing and dancing along with the beat. Sure he still had feelings for her, almost 10 years later. But he was grateful because they had something stronger than sexual attraction. They had a friendship. Something that had been tested by everything. From a failed relationship both togeather and separately. Fights, disappearances, and even deaths. Yet here they were, like old times, just enjoying the silly things in life together. Experiencing the world with both arms open.

 And he as grateful they were fri...

 "Happy birthday" her voice cut off his musings mid thought. Her bright eyes looking up at him as they glowed in the light of the music. Beautiful blue almost magical. Her smile, the smile that seemed to emanate from her very body, that smile that would make him weak in the knees. That smile that he would do anything to see.

 Who was he kidding? He was in love with her, he would be until his dying breath.

 Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was the magic of Britney, but suddenly all his resolve was gone. That small thin thread of friendship he had been clinging too disappeared with the smoke that filled the air as he leaned forward kissing her.

 And to his pure delight, she kissed him back.

 He must have been dreaming, there was no way this was real. Yet here they were, and God did she taste amazing.

 Pulling away he found himself lost in those blue beautiful eyes totally forgetting where he was. Not even the power of Britney Spears herself could bring him back from the heaven he had been pulled into.

 "Wana get out of here?" He asked, more of a plea than a question. She nodded slipping her hand into his.

 He had never run so fast in his life.

 Pulling her with him hearing her laughs ringing in his ears as they darted around other guests of the hotel. A laugh that was more beautiful than any other sound in the world. God, it took all his self-control to not take her right there in the middle of the Planet Hollywood.

 They were in the room moments later as he pulled her into another kiss. Hands desperately moving over at her outfit (or lack there of), her hair, her skin. Anything and everything. Just to feel her, taste her, just to get her as close to him as possible.

 They landed on his bed her looking up at him with those beautiful blue eyes as he undid her bra-let.

 "Are you sure you want this?" She whispered doubts filling her eyes as she studied him. He felt himself melt seeing her under him for the first time in a long time so vulnerable. If it had been anyone else he would have taken this as a cue to slow down but he knew Jen. She was a clear communicator even more so when drunk. "because I don't know if I can promise anything later and..."

 Gently he leaned  down kissing her, "I want this more than you will ever know"

 -------

 "I won" Faith sang skipping down the Batcave holding out her phone. Damian scowled as he walked up to the girl who stood smugly holding up her phone.

 "You gave him a keychain, I had a katana"

 "Oh silly, that was simply a division, " Faith said showing the others her phone.

 "What... is that GRAYSON?"

 Stephanie giggled leaning forward to look at the pictures Faith was showing them, "man they look amazing" There was a picture of Dick dressed up in his Circus outfit complete with top hat and open tux jacket. Body glitter over his face and bare chest.

 There were a few of Jen in her outfit kissing her snake.

 Another picture showed Dick holding Jen's hand up as he spun her around.

 “Who took these pictures?” Tim asked

 “I have my ways.” Faith giggled before swiping to another photo.

 One of the everyone’s favorite non-couple (after Maia and Roy) kissing under the flashing colored lights.

 "Jen's the one who got him those tickets" Damian mumbled going back to the mat unconvinced of how this was Faith’s gift.

 "That's what they think... but where do you think she got the idea? Who do you think casually mentioned it to Annabella what their outfits should be? Who do you think kept saying what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas? And who knew put in the right situation those two would finally get over it?" Faith said sweeping her hands open as she revealed her master plan. Tim laughed shaking his head

 "You really are a little puppet master."

 “I mean… it’s Britney Bitch” Faith giggled, “Anything can happen.”

[readbookywooks]

“- if you like. I don't mind about the pike.” “I can't do that,” said Amschat. “Was that a lie?” “No! There is wild country around us, robbers and - things.” Esk nodded brightly. “That's settled, then,” she said. “I don't mind sleeping in the fleeces. And I can pay my way. I can do -” She hesitated; her unfinished sentence hung like a little curl of crystal in the air while discretion made a successful bid for control of her tongue. “- helpful things,” she finished lamely. She was aware that Amschat was looking slightly sideways at his senior wife, who was sewing by the stove. By Zoon tradition she wore nothing but black. Granny would have thoroughly approved. “What sort of helpful things?” he asked. “Washing and sweeping, yesno?” “If you like,” said Esk, “or distillation using the bifold or triple alembic, the making of varnishes, glazes, creams, zuumchats and punes, the rendering of waxes, the manufacture of candles, the proper selection of seeds, roots and cuttings, and most preparations from the Eighty Marvellous Herbs; I can spin, card, rett, Hallow and weave on the hand, frame, harp and Noble looms and I can knit if people start the wool on for me, I can read soil and rock, do carpentry up to the three-way mortise and tenon, predict weather by means of beastsign and skyreck, make increase in bees, brew five types of mead, make dyes and mordants and pigments, including a fast blue, I can do most types of whitesmithing, mend boots, cure and fashion most leathers, and if you have any goats I can look after them. I like goats.” Amschat looked at her thoughtfully. She felt she was expected to continue. “Granny never likes to see people sitting around doing nothing,” she offered. “She always says a girl who is good with her hands will never want for a living,” she added, by way of further explanation. “Or a husband, I expect,” nodded Amschat, weakly. “Actually, Granny had a lot to say about that -” “I bet she did,” said Amschat. He looked at the senior wife, who nodded almost imperceptibly. “Very well,” he said. “If you can make yourself useful you can stay. And can you play a musical instrument?” Esk returned his steady gaze, not batting an eyelid. “Probably.” And so Esk, with the minimum of difficulty and only a little regret, left the Ramtops and their weather and joined the Zoons on their great trading journey down the Ankh. There were at least thirty barges with at least one sprawling Zoon family on each, and no two vessels appeared to be carrying the same cargo; most of them were strung together, and the Zoons simply hauled on the cable and stepped on to the next deck if they fancied a bit of socialising. Esk set up home in the fleeces. It was warm, smelled slightly of Granny's cottage and, much more important, meant that she was undisturbed. She was getting a bit worried about magic. It was definitely getting out of control. She wasn't doing magic, it was just happening around her. And she sensed that people probably wouldn't be too happy if they knew. It meant that if she washed up she had to clatter and splash at length to conceal the fact that the dishes were cleaning themselves. If she did some darning she had to do it on some private part of the deck to conceal the fact that the edges of the hole ravelled themselves together as if . . . as if by magic. Then she woke up on the second day of her voyage to find that several of the fleeces around the spot where she had hidden the staff had combed, carded and spun themselves into neat skeins during the night. She put all thoughts of lighting fires out of her head. There were compensations, though. Every sluggish turn of the great brown river brought new scenes. There were dark stretches hemmed in with deep forest, through which the barges traveled in the dead centre of the river with the men armed and the women below - except for Esk, who sat listening with interest to the snortings and sneezings that followed them through the bushes on the banks. There were stretches of farmland. There were several towns much larger than Ohulan. There were even some mountains, although they were old and flat and not young and frisky like her mountains. Not that she was homesick, exactly, but sometimes she felt like a boat herself, drifting on the edge of an infinite rope but always attached to an anchor. The barges stopped at some of the towns. By tradition only the men went ashore, and only Amschat, wearing his ceremonial Lying hat, spoke to non-Zoons. Esk usually went with him. He tried hinting that she should obey the unwritten rules of Zoon life and stay afloat, but a hint was to Esk what a mosquito bite was to the average rhino because she was already learning that if you ignore the rules people will, half the time, quietly rewrite them so that they don't apply to you. Anyway, it seemed to Amschat that when Esk was with him he always got a very good price. There was something about a small child squinting determinedly at them from behind his legs that made even market-hardened merchants hastily conclude their business. In fact, it began to worry him. When a market broker in the walled town of Zemphis offered him a bag of ultramarines in exchange for a hundred fleeces a voice from the level of his pockets said: “They're not ultramarines.” “Listen to the child!” said the broker, grinning. Amschat solemnly held one of the stones to his eye. “I am listening,” he said, “and they do indeed look like ultramarines. They have the glit and shimmy.” Esk shook her head. “They're just spircles,” she said. She said it without thinking, and regretted it immediately as both men turned to stare at her. Amschat turned the stone over in his palm. Putting the chameleon spircle stones into a box with some real gems so that they appeared to change their hue was a traditional trick, but these had the true inner blue fire. He looked up sharply at the broker. Amschat had been finely trained in the art of the Lie. He recognised the subtle signs, now that he came to think about it. “There seems to be a doubt,” he said, “but 'tis easily resolved, we need only take them to the assayer in Pine Street because the world knows that spircles will dissolve in hypactic fluid, yesno?” The broker hesitated. Amschat had changed position slightly, and the set of his muscles suggested that any sudden movement on the broker's part would see him flat in the dust. And that damn child was squinting at him as though she could see through to the back of his mind. His nerve broke. “I regret this unfortunate dispute,” he said. “I had accepted the stones as ultramarines in good faith but rather than cause disharmony between us I will ask you to accept them as - as a gift, and for the fleeces may I offer this roseatte of the first sorting?” He took a small red stone from a tiny velvet pouch. Amschat hardly looked at it but, without taking his eyes off the man, passed it down to Esk. She nodded. When the merchant had hurried off Amschat took Esk's hand and half-dragged her to the assayer's stall, which was little more than a niche in the wall. The old man took the smallest of the blue stones, listened to Amschat's hurried explanation, poured out a saucerful of hypactic fluid and dropped the stone in. It frothed into nothingness. “Very interesting,” he said. He took another stone in a tweezer and examined it under a glass. “They are indeed spircles, but remarkably fine specimens in their own right,” he concluded. “They are by no means worthless, and I for example would be prepared to offer you - is there something wrong with the little girl's eyes?” Amschat nudged Esk, who stopped trying out another Look. “- I would offer you, shall we say, two zats of silver?” “Shall we say five?” said Amschat pleasantly. “And I would like to keep one of the stones,” said Esk. The old man threw up his hands. “But they are mere curios!” he said. “Of value only to a collector!” “A collector may yet sell them to an unsuspecting purchaser as finest roseattes or ultramarines,” said Amschat, “especially if he was the only assayer in town.” The assayer grumbled a bit at this, but at last they settled on three zats and one of the spircles on a thin silver chain for Esk. When they were out of earshot Amschat handed her the tiny silver coins and said: “These are yours. You have earned them. But -” he hunkered down so that his eyes were on a level with hers, “- you must tell me how you knew the stones were false.” He looked worried, but Esk sensed that he wouldn't really like the truth. Magic made people uncomfortable. He wouldn't like it if she said simply: spircles are spircles and ultramarines are ultramarines, and though you may think they look the same that is because most people don't use their eyes in the right way. Nothing can entirely disguise its true nature. Instead she said: “The dwarves mine spircles near the village where I was born, and you soon learn to see how they bend light in a funny way.” Amschat looked into her eyes for some time. Then he shrugged. “Okay,��� he said. “Fine. Well, I have some further business here. Why don't you buy yourself some new clothes, or something? I'd warn you against unscrupulous traders but, somehow, I don't know, I don't think you will have any trouble.” Esk nodded. Amschat strode off through the market place. At the first corner he turned, looked at her thoughtfully, and then disappeared among the crowds. Well, that's the end of sailing, Esk told herself. He's not quite sure but he's going to be watching me now and before I know what's happening the staff will be taken away and there'll be all sorts of trouble. Why does everyone get so upset about magic? She gave a philosophical sigh and set about exploring the possibilities of the town. There was the question of the staff, though. Esk had rammed it deep among the fleeces, which were not going to be unloaded yet. If she went back for it people would start asking questions, and she didn't know the answers. She found a convenient alleyway and scuttled down it until a deep doorway gave her the privacy she required. If going back was out of the question then only one thing remained. She held out a hand and closed her eyes. She knew exactly what she wanted to do-it lay in front of her eyes. The staff mustn't come flying through the air, wrecking the barge and drawing attention to itself. All she wanted, she told herself, was for there to be a slight change in the way the world was organised. It shouldn't be a world where the staff was in the fleeces, it should be a world where it was in her hand. A tiny change, an infinitesimal alteration to the Way Things Were. If Esk had been properly trained in wizardry she would have known that this was impossible. All wizards knew how to move things about, starting with protons and working upwards, but the important thing about moving something from A to Z, according to basic physics, was that at some point it should pass through the rest of the alphabet. The only way one could cause something to vanish at A and appear at Z would be to shuffle the whole of Reality sideways. The problems this would cause didn't bear thinking about. Esk, of course, had not been trained, and it is well known that a vital ingredient of success is not knowing that what you're attempting can't be done. A person ignorant of the possibility of failure can be a halfbrick in the path of the bicycle of history.